1 00:00:27,080 --> 00:00:31,417 Good afternoon. Wide World ofSports is in the Republic of San Marcos 2 00:00:31,542 --> 00:00:35,254 where we're going to bring you a live, on-the-spot assassination. 3 00:00:35,379 --> 00:00:38,799 They're going to kill the president of this lovely country 4 00:00:38,924 --> 00:00:41,593 and replace him with a military dictatorship. 5 00:00:41,718 --> 00:00:44,805 Everybody is about as excited and tense as can be. 6 00:00:44,930 --> 00:00:48,850 The weather this afternoon is perfect and, if you've just joined us, 7 00:00:48,975 --> 00:00:51,311 we've seen a series of colourful riots 8 00:00:51,436 --> 00:00:54,773 that started with the bombing of the American Embassy, 9 00:00:54,898 --> 00:00:57,359 a ritual as old as the city itself. 10 00:00:57,484 --> 00:01:00,778 Then the leader of the Labour union, Julio Doaz, 11 00:01:00,903 --> 00:01:03,906 was dragged from his home and beaten by an angry mob. 12 00:01:04,031 --> 00:01:07,326 It was one of the most exciting spectacles I've ever seen. 13 00:01:07,451 --> 00:01:10,746 We'll probably have a videotape replay of that later on. 14 00:01:10,871 --> 00:01:13,958 All around, there are colourful flags and hats. 15 00:01:14,083 --> 00:01:18,545 Now the moment we've been waiting for is here. Everyone is getting quiet. 16 00:01:18,670 --> 00:01:22,715 The president will leave his office and walk down the steps of the palace. 17 00:01:22,841 --> 00:01:28,012 For that, we're going down on the playing area. Take it away, Howard. 18 00:01:29,806 --> 00:01:32,350 This is tremendous, Don, just tremendous. 19 00:01:32,475 --> 00:01:36,855 The atmosphere heavy, uncertain, overtones of ugliness. 20 00:01:36,980 --> 00:01:41,316 A reminder, in a way, of how it was in March of 1964 at Miami Beach 21 00:01:41,442 --> 00:01:43,902 when Clay met Liston for the first time 22 00:01:44,027 --> 00:01:46,488 and nobody was certain how it would turn out. 23 00:01:46,613 --> 00:01:49,867 The crowd is tense. They've been here since ten this morning. 24 00:01:49,992 --> 00:01:55,289 And... And I think I see... the door beginning to open. 25 00:01:55,414 --> 00:01:59,001 EI presidente may be coming out. 26 00:02:00,835 --> 00:02:03,296 The door opens. It's he. 27 00:02:03,421 --> 00:02:05,465 It's EI presidente. 28 00:02:11,929 --> 00:02:13,973 He turns! 29 00:02:25,609 --> 00:02:27,736 And down! 30 00:02:32,949 --> 00:02:36,411 It's over. It's all over for EI presidente! 31 00:02:36,536 --> 00:02:40,707 This reporter is going to get to him, if he can, through this mob 32 00:02:40,831 --> 00:02:43,459 for one last word before he expires. 33 00:02:43,584 --> 00:02:46,253 As you can see, this crowd is not to be trifled with. 34 00:02:46,378 --> 00:02:49,965 They're in a frenzy. They're trying to get over to EI presidente 35 00:02:50,091 --> 00:02:52,551 even as I am trying to do now. 36 00:02:52,676 --> 00:02:56,806 Would you people let me through? This is American television. 37 00:02:56,931 --> 00:03:00,768 American television. Please let me through. 38 00:03:00,893 --> 00:03:02,936 We're getting through now. 39 00:03:03,061 --> 00:03:05,313 Here we are. Here we are. Sir. 40 00:03:05,438 --> 00:03:09,150 Sir, you've been shot. When did you know it was all over? 41 00:03:09,275 --> 00:03:11,945 Fascist... dictator. 42 00:03:12,737 --> 00:03:16,658 You're upset. That's understandable under the circumstances. 43 00:03:16,783 --> 00:03:20,703 I guess now you'll have to announce your retirement. 44 00:03:22,871 --> 00:03:25,040 Well, good luck to you, sir. 45 00:03:25,165 --> 00:03:27,835 Now, if you folks will bear with me for a moment, 46 00:03:27,960 --> 00:03:31,839 I'm going to try and get in a word with the new dictator of San Marcos. 47 00:03:31,964 --> 00:03:35,884 That's assuming I can get through this noisy, demonstrative crowd. 48 00:03:36,009 --> 00:03:38,262 I wonder if you people would let me through. 49 00:03:38,387 --> 00:03:40,639 I see the general off in the distance. 50 00:03:40,764 --> 00:03:44,350 The new dictator talking to one of his men. 51 00:03:44,475 --> 00:03:46,936 Excuse me. Excuse me, sir. 52 00:03:47,061 --> 00:03:52,567 General. General, congratulations. General Emilio Molina Vargas. 53 00:03:52,692 --> 00:03:55,820 General, a word from you, if you will, sir, for our viewers. 54 00:03:55,945 --> 00:04:00,366 For many years, I have waited for this day, but now I am the state. 55 00:04:00,491 --> 00:04:04,411 You may say that, sir, but many important diplomats contend 56 00:04:04,536 --> 00:04:07,622 that you remain the most hated man in the state. 57 00:04:07,748 --> 00:04:11,376 I will shut down the newspapers. I will train my soldiers. 58 00:04:11,501 --> 00:04:13,128 We'll find the rebels. 59 00:04:13,253 --> 00:04:17,799 They may be in the form of democratic guerrilla factions off in the hills. 60 00:04:17,924 --> 00:04:20,218 No, sir. We'll find them. Don't worry. 61 00:04:20,343 --> 00:04:23,013 - Good luck to you, sir. - Thank you, sir. 62 00:04:23,138 --> 00:04:25,806 Well, you've heard it with your own eyes. 63 00:04:25,931 --> 00:04:29,060 Now we're going to have to see what the future brings. 64 00:04:29,185 --> 00:04:33,606 Now, from the little dictatorship of San Marcos in Latin America, 65 00:04:33,731 --> 00:04:38,027 Iet's go back to Jim McLane in our studios in New York. 66 00:06:21,876 --> 00:06:24,503 Gentlemen, the Exec-usiser. 67 00:06:24,628 --> 00:06:27,881 The latest work-in-progress at General Equipment. 68 00:06:28,006 --> 00:06:30,425 It's only in the development stage, 69 00:06:30,550 --> 00:06:33,219 but it should be in the market within two years. 70 00:06:33,344 --> 00:06:35,388 It certainly looks impressive. 71 00:06:35,513 --> 00:06:39,225 The Exec-usiser is a device to help busy executives exercise 72 00:06:39,350 --> 00:06:42,437 without ever pausing in their crowded work schedule. 73 00:06:42,562 --> 00:06:45,982 More Americans suffer heart attacks from lack of exercise. 74 00:06:46,107 --> 00:06:49,359 You know why? Because there aren't enough hours in the day 75 00:06:49,485 --> 00:06:53,697 to keep physically fit and still function effectively in one's business. 76 00:06:53,822 --> 00:06:56,909 This is Mr Fielding Mellish, our research tester, 77 00:06:57,034 --> 00:06:59,953 who will demonstrate the Exec-usiser. 78 00:07:00,079 --> 00:07:03,791 Every part of the body receives an adequate exercise work-out. 79 00:07:03,916 --> 00:07:08,003 The pedalling develops the muscles to keep the leg muscles flexible. 80 00:07:08,127 --> 00:07:12,048 When Mr Mellish pulls the drawer out, a weight has to be lifted 81 00:07:12,173 --> 00:07:15,676 on top of the desk which exercises his arms and his back muscles. 82 00:07:15,802 --> 00:07:18,763 The telephones are both spring activated. 83 00:07:18,888 --> 00:07:24,977 Both muscles in the biceps are given a work-out to sustain flexible arms. 84 00:07:25,103 --> 00:07:27,730 On the back wall, there's a handle for each arm. 85 00:07:27,855 --> 00:07:30,816 As he pulls, the back muscles are brought into action 86 00:07:30,941 --> 00:07:33,860 in a manner that keeps the back flexible and strong. 87 00:07:33,985 --> 00:07:36,655 The basketballs at the side of the machine, 88 00:07:36,780 --> 00:07:41,410 as they're handled by Mr Mellish, develop reflexes. 89 00:07:44,663 --> 00:07:48,250 - How many can you put out a year? - We'd like you to manufacture them. 90 00:07:48,375 --> 00:07:51,168 We can let you have the idea, let you have our package. 91 00:07:51,293 --> 00:07:53,838 We can let you have it all on a royalty basis. 92 00:07:53,963 --> 00:07:57,383 We can show you how to turn it out. We can show you how to save money. 93 00:07:57,508 --> 00:07:59,969 - And you think it'll sell? - No question. 94 00:08:00,094 --> 00:08:04,807 If we can get it in the office, we can get it in the armed forces. 95 00:08:04,932 --> 00:08:07,309 You'll do business with the uS government. 96 00:08:07,435 --> 00:08:09,478 I'm not suited to this job. 97 00:08:09,603 --> 00:08:13,106 Where do I come off testing products? Machines hate me. 98 00:08:13,231 --> 00:08:16,568 I should be working at a job that I have some kind of aptitude for. 99 00:08:16,693 --> 00:08:19,404 Donating sperm to an artificial insemination lab. 100 00:08:19,529 --> 00:08:23,074 - Every day we gotta hear this. - Why did I quit college? 101 00:08:23,199 --> 00:08:26,911 - I could've been something today. - What would you have been? 102 00:08:27,037 --> 00:08:29,914 I don't know. I was in the Black Studies programme. 103 00:08:30,040 --> 00:08:32,624 By now, I could've been black. 104 00:08:32,750 --> 00:08:36,378 - ..consistent loser at the table. - That's my weakness. I lose. 105 00:08:36,503 --> 00:08:39,715 - I don't know what I'll do tonight. - Get a date. We'll double. 106 00:08:39,840 --> 00:08:42,718 - OK, I'll call Barbara. - Have her bring a friend. 107 00:08:42,843 --> 00:08:45,971 - Forget it. - I had a date. She called it off. 108 00:08:46,096 --> 00:08:48,724 - There's a dock strike. - See what Norma's doing. 109 00:08:48,849 --> 00:08:51,934 - She's always ready for action. - Who? 110 00:09:12,913 --> 00:09:15,165 You... You busy tonight? 111 00:09:16,458 --> 00:09:18,710 Some old friends are coming over. 112 00:09:19,586 --> 00:09:23,298 We're gonna show some pornographic movies. 113 00:09:24,257 --> 00:09:26,301 You need an usher? 114 00:09:26,426 --> 00:09:30,806 You're cute. I'm busy. 115 00:10:32,740 --> 00:10:34,782 Get a copy of Time magazine 116 00:10:34,907 --> 00:10:40,455 and I think I'll take Commentary and the Saturday Review. 117 00:10:41,122 --> 00:10:44,709 And... Iet's see, Newsweek. 118 00:10:45,460 --> 00:10:49,172 I'll just... grab one of these. 119 00:10:52,341 --> 00:10:54,384 Take 'em all. 120 00:10:54,509 --> 00:10:56,720 Fifty, a dollar, dollar and a quarter... 121 00:10:56,845 --> 00:10:59,639 Hey, Ralph, how much is a copy of Orgasm? 122 00:10:59,765 --> 00:11:02,017 - Just put 'em in a bag, will you? - What? 123 00:11:02,142 --> 00:11:05,437 Orgasm. This man wants to buy a copy. How much is it? 124 00:11:05,562 --> 00:11:08,065 Doing a sociological study on perversion. 125 00:11:08,190 --> 00:11:11,026 I'm up to advanced child molesting. 126 00:13:12,975 --> 00:13:15,644 Come back. Back, back. More, more, more. 127 00:13:15,770 --> 00:13:17,813 Back, back, back. 128 00:14:02,772 --> 00:14:05,775 Hi. I'm collecting names on a petition 129 00:14:05,900 --> 00:14:09,612 to request our government to break relations with San Marcos 130 00:14:09,737 --> 00:14:12,782 which is ruled by a military brutal dictatorship 131 00:14:12,907 --> 00:14:16,452 opposed to any concept of civil liberties. Would you sign? 132 00:14:16,577 --> 00:14:18,621 Sure. 133 00:14:19,955 --> 00:14:22,833 - I'm sorry. I broke the point. - That's OK. 134 00:14:22,958 --> 00:14:27,504 Want to come in? I have a pencil. And I'll give you another pencil. 135 00:14:28,797 --> 00:14:31,216 Have you been following it in the newspapers? 136 00:14:31,341 --> 00:14:34,010 Soon there's gonna be a revolution in San Marcos. 137 00:14:34,136 --> 00:14:38,598 The united States should support the rebels and not the dictatorship, 138 00:14:38,724 --> 00:14:42,143 which, as you know, has been our history. 139 00:14:43,561 --> 00:14:45,187 What do you do? 140 00:14:45,312 --> 00:14:48,607 I'm a products tester for a large corporation. 141 00:14:48,733 --> 00:14:51,652 I make sure products are safe and practical. 142 00:14:51,777 --> 00:14:54,030 Today I tested an exercise machine 143 00:14:54,155 --> 00:14:57,658 and an electrically warmed toilet seat for cold days. 144 00:14:57,783 --> 00:14:59,827 Would you like some coffee? 145 00:14:59,952 --> 00:15:03,329 If you're hungry, I could open a can of ribs if you want. 146 00:15:03,455 --> 00:15:06,750 Ribs? I'd love some coffee, but I have a lot of work to do. 147 00:15:06,875 --> 00:15:10,795 Here, I'll make you some. It'll take two seconds to make some coffee. 148 00:15:10,920 --> 00:15:14,340 How can I find out more about your cause? I have a lot of spare time. 149 00:15:14,466 --> 00:15:17,844 Would you like to volunteer for the Volunteers for San Marcos? 150 00:15:17,969 --> 00:15:21,556 Is it possible to discuss that over dinner tomorrow night? 151 00:15:21,680 --> 00:15:25,392 Doesn't have to be tomorrow night. I'm open for the next six years. 152 00:15:25,517 --> 00:15:29,229 I have a yoga class tomorrow night and I couldn't miss that. 153 00:15:29,355 --> 00:15:31,607 Yoga. I love yoga. 154 00:15:31,732 --> 00:15:36,111 Do you really? Yoga - it's one of my great passions. 155 00:15:36,987 --> 00:15:39,448 I love Eastern philosophies. 156 00:15:39,573 --> 00:15:42,825 It's... metaphysical and redundant. 157 00:15:42,950 --> 00:15:45,620 - Yes. - Abortively pedantic. 158 00:15:45,745 --> 00:15:48,289 - I know just what you mean. - Thank you. 159 00:15:48,414 --> 00:15:50,666 Have you ever read the I Ching? 160 00:15:51,542 --> 00:15:56,297 Not the actual Ching itself, but I've dabbled in Kierkegaard. 161 00:15:56,422 --> 00:15:59,300 - Oh, well, of course he's Danish. - Yes. 162 00:15:59,425 --> 00:16:01,928 He'd be the first to admit that. 163 00:16:02,053 --> 00:16:04,930 Yeah... Yeah. 164 00:16:06,682 --> 00:16:10,811 You know, I was just saying to... Have you ever been to Denmark? 165 00:16:10,936 --> 00:16:13,605 I've been to... Yes, to the Vatican. 166 00:16:13,730 --> 00:16:16,400 The Vatican? The Vatican's in Rome. 167 00:16:16,525 --> 00:16:21,279 Well, they were doing so well in Rome that they opened one in Denmark. 168 00:16:22,155 --> 00:16:26,283 I was just saying to someone the other day that the Scandinavians 169 00:16:26,409 --> 00:16:29,912 seem to have such an instinctive feel for the human condition. 170 00:16:30,037 --> 00:16:33,874 That's very wise. You know, that's... I think, pithy. 171 00:16:35,126 --> 00:16:37,378 It was... pithy. 172 00:16:37,503 --> 00:16:40,715 It had... great pith. 173 00:16:40,840 --> 00:16:43,384 Yeth. Pith. 174 00:16:43,509 --> 00:16:45,552 Pith. 175 00:16:45,677 --> 00:16:50,432 Lithen, I have to... Listen, I have to go. I have a lot of work to do. 176 00:16:50,557 --> 00:16:53,018 I'd love to have coffee, but I don't have time. 177 00:16:53,143 --> 00:16:56,688 - I have an early class tomorrow. - It'll just take a second. 178 00:16:56,813 --> 00:17:00,358 I know, but I have more bells to ring and I have an early class. 179 00:17:00,483 --> 00:17:02,944 - Really? You a student? - Yeah. City College. 180 00:17:03,069 --> 00:17:07,823 That's a great school. I ate in their cafeteria once. I got trichinosis. 181 00:17:07,948 --> 00:17:11,785 - Oh. I'm a philosophy major. - That's a wonderful subject. 182 00:17:11,910 --> 00:17:16,498 Wonderful thing. What is the meaning of life and death? Why are we here? 183 00:17:16,623 --> 00:17:20,377 - You like Chinese food? - Yeah. That sounds... When? 184 00:17:20,502 --> 00:17:22,796 The night after tomorrow? 185 00:17:22,921 --> 00:17:27,925 That's... I can't. I have a meeting of my women's liberation group. 186 00:17:28,051 --> 00:17:31,262 You're not... You don't have hostility to the male sex? 187 00:17:31,387 --> 00:17:35,058 Women's rights do not automatically mean castration. 188 00:17:36,559 --> 00:17:41,522 Don't say that word. Now I've got to walk around like this for two days. 189 00:17:41,647 --> 00:17:45,609 I know. I'm that way on that word appendicitis. I can't take that. 190 00:17:45,734 --> 00:17:49,029 - But castration. - Castration, appendicitis. Either. 191 00:17:49,154 --> 00:17:52,866 - No, there's a difference. - No, there isn't. 192 00:17:52,991 --> 00:17:55,035 What about Saturday? 193 00:17:55,160 --> 00:17:59,081 Listen, why don't you take my phone number here 194 00:17:59,206 --> 00:18:01,249 and call me on Sat... 195 00:18:01,375 --> 00:18:04,878 Call me on Saturday. It's those two pieces right there. 196 00:18:05,003 --> 00:18:09,298 OK? Bye. I may be bombing an office building, but I'll find out. 197 00:18:09,423 --> 00:18:13,344 - OK. It was nice to meet you. - Nice meeting you, too. 198 00:18:18,224 --> 00:18:21,310 Oh, wait. You forgot to sign my petition. 199 00:18:24,105 --> 00:18:25,523 Sorry. 200 00:18:25,648 --> 00:18:29,067 Nancy. You may call me Fielding. 201 00:18:29,192 --> 00:18:32,904 I think Mr Mellish is a little formal. 202 00:18:33,029 --> 00:18:35,073 The two of us together. 203 00:18:35,198 --> 00:18:38,576 Fielding from the Latin meaning "strong" or "with strength". 204 00:18:38,702 --> 00:18:41,371 You'll come to lean on that strength after a while 205 00:18:41,496 --> 00:18:43,540 and to know you can rely on me. 206 00:18:43,665 --> 00:18:46,334 I've always been a great champion of the underdog. 207 00:18:46,459 --> 00:18:49,253 I think anyone could tell you that, my pet. 208 00:18:51,714 --> 00:18:55,676 You see, Nancy, I've always been devoted to humanity. 209 00:18:55,801 --> 00:19:01,557 To a guy like me, the greatest crimes are the crimes against human dignity. 210 00:19:24,871 --> 00:19:27,206 How is it? Can you hear the music clearly? 211 00:19:27,331 --> 00:19:29,875 This should be a great seller in California. 212 00:19:35,547 --> 00:19:37,799 You wanna play poker tonight? We got room. 213 00:19:37,924 --> 00:19:40,385 - I can't. I got an appointment. - What kind? 214 00:19:40,510 --> 00:19:42,554 - I'm gonna picket an embassy. - What? 215 00:19:42,679 --> 00:19:44,723 Don't worry. I know what I'm doing. 216 00:20:09,746 --> 00:20:12,207 It's a little light. 217 00:20:12,332 --> 00:20:14,793 I'll get the shade. 218 00:20:23,968 --> 00:20:27,555 - Do you have any candles? - No. Why? 219 00:20:27,681 --> 00:20:31,266 This light for the mood - it's not right, right now. 220 00:20:36,522 --> 00:20:38,774 That's too light. 221 00:20:47,950 --> 00:20:50,202 - Is it warm in here? - Warm? 222 00:20:50,327 --> 00:20:52,370 Warm. 223 00:20:59,377 --> 00:21:01,838 Where's the bathroom? 224 00:21:01,963 --> 00:21:04,632 - The bathroom? - Right there. 225 00:21:22,315 --> 00:21:24,776 Leave a little air. 226 00:22:09,486 --> 00:22:11,529 I love you. I love you. 227 00:22:11,654 --> 00:22:13,906 Say it in French. Please say it in French. 228 00:22:14,031 --> 00:22:17,326 - I don't know French. - Oh, please. Please. 229 00:22:17,451 --> 00:22:19,870 What about Hebrew? 230 00:22:20,037 --> 00:22:25,042 I was... I was always very shy when it came to girls. 231 00:22:25,167 --> 00:22:27,419 I remember when I was a little boy, 232 00:22:27,544 --> 00:22:31,882 I once stole a pornographic book that was printed in Braille. 233 00:22:32,007 --> 00:22:34,676 I used to rub the dirty parts. 234 00:22:34,801 --> 00:22:39,263 And l... I guess I had a good relationship with my parents. 235 00:22:39,389 --> 00:22:42,058 I... They very rarely hit... 236 00:22:42,183 --> 00:22:45,978 I think they hit me once, actually, in my whole childhood. 237 00:22:46,104 --> 00:22:51,067 They started beating me on the 23rd December 1942 238 00:22:51,192 --> 00:22:55,487 and stopped beating me in the late spring of '44. 239 00:22:55,612 --> 00:22:59,741 I was a nervous child. I was a bed-wetter. 240 00:22:59,866 --> 00:23:04,496 When I was younger, I used to sleep with an electric blanket 241 00:23:04,621 --> 00:23:07,791 and I was constantly electrocuting myself. 242 00:23:08,291 --> 00:23:12,587 It's funny, I had this dream that I've had since I was a child. 243 00:23:12,713 --> 00:23:15,214 I had it again one night last week. 244 00:23:15,339 --> 00:23:17,383 Where I'm... 245 00:24:16,606 --> 00:24:19,901 I have to tell you something and I don't know how to break it. 246 00:24:20,026 --> 00:24:22,695 - Fielding... - Why? ls something the matter? 247 00:24:22,820 --> 00:24:25,281 Have you seen X-rays of me? 248 00:24:26,949 --> 00:24:29,410 I saw X-rays of you. 249 00:24:31,120 --> 00:24:35,458 - I fail to see the humour of this. - You didn't see the X-rays. 250 00:24:35,583 --> 00:24:37,834 - Tell me what's the matter. - Nothing. 251 00:24:37,959 --> 00:24:41,463 You know when your heart beats? Well, my heart is beating. 252 00:24:41,588 --> 00:24:45,092 I just don't think we should see each other any more. 253 00:24:45,217 --> 00:24:47,678 - Really? - Yeah. 254 00:24:47,803 --> 00:24:49,930 - I'm sorry. - Why? What's the matter? 255 00:24:50,055 --> 00:24:53,767 There's just something missing for me and I don't know what. 256 00:24:53,892 --> 00:24:56,353 What do you mean? Something missing from me? 257 00:24:56,478 --> 00:24:58,729 - Yes. - What do you mean? Like what? 258 00:24:58,854 --> 00:25:00,898 Like... 259 00:25:01,023 --> 00:25:03,067 Can you say what is missing from me? 260 00:25:03,192 --> 00:25:06,487 No. Maybe if you could guess a few things, I could try. 261 00:25:06,612 --> 00:25:10,116 - What do you mean? Can you tell me? - I don't know what's missing. 262 00:25:10,241 --> 00:25:13,119 - Is it personality or looks? - Well, no. 263 00:25:13,244 --> 00:25:15,287 - Am I not smart enough? - No. 264 00:25:15,413 --> 00:25:17,456 - Because I'm not... - No. 265 00:25:17,581 --> 00:25:19,666 It has nothing to do with height? 266 00:25:19,791 --> 00:25:22,419 It has nothing to do with the fact you're short 267 00:25:22,544 --> 00:25:25,171 or the fact that you're not bright enough. 268 00:25:25,296 --> 00:25:28,466 Nothing to do with the fact that your teeth are in bad shape. 269 00:25:28,591 --> 00:25:31,970 So what, then? I don't understand. Has it got to do with... 270 00:25:32,095 --> 00:25:35,598 It's not my personality. Do you have fun when you're with me? 271 00:25:35,724 --> 00:25:38,393 No... But it's not that. 272 00:25:38,518 --> 00:25:40,769 It's not that I don't have fun with you... 273 00:25:40,894 --> 00:25:45,024 We have fun when we laugh. Don't tell me that we haven't laughed. 274 00:25:45,149 --> 00:25:49,111 - It's not that we haven't laughed. - Certainly I laugh a lot. 275 00:25:49,236 --> 00:25:52,823 - Sometimes you don't laugh and... - I can't put my finger on it. 276 00:25:52,948 --> 00:25:55,868 - Something's missing. - What? Can you be specific? 277 00:25:55,993 --> 00:25:58,120 The relationship isn't going anywhere. 278 00:25:58,245 --> 00:26:01,205 - Where do you want to it go? - Where could we get it to go? 279 00:26:01,331 --> 00:26:04,000 That's not... I don't know where. I love you. 280 00:26:04,125 --> 00:26:06,502 I mean, I love you and you love me. 281 00:26:06,627 --> 00:26:09,297 No. And it's not because I don't love you. 282 00:26:09,422 --> 00:26:11,674 - Then you love me? - No, I don't. 283 00:26:11,799 --> 00:26:14,177 - That's what I mean... - But that's not why. 284 00:26:14,302 --> 00:26:17,180 Something is missing. I need a very strong man. 285 00:26:17,305 --> 00:26:19,349 - I'm strong. - I need a leader. 286 00:26:19,474 --> 00:26:21,725 I have all the qualities of leadership. 287 00:26:21,850 --> 00:26:24,519 I'm interested in so many vital political things. 288 00:26:24,645 --> 00:26:28,523 - Me, too. That binds us together. - I wanna work with pygmies in Africa. 289 00:26:28,649 --> 00:26:31,068 I wanna work with lepers on a leper colony. 290 00:26:31,193 --> 00:26:33,195 No, that's perfectly OK. 291 00:26:33,320 --> 00:26:37,407 I love leprosy. If that's what you're asking me. I'm perfectly willing... 292 00:26:37,532 --> 00:26:42,203 I like leprosy. I like cholera. I like all the major skin diseases. 293 00:26:42,328 --> 00:26:44,997 - You're immature, Fielding. - How am I immature? 294 00:26:45,122 --> 00:26:47,583 Emotionally, sexually and intellectually. 295 00:26:47,708 --> 00:26:51,003 - Yeah, but what other ways? - Maybe it's my fault. 296 00:26:51,128 --> 00:26:55,257 - Maybe I just can't give. - Why don't you receive? I'll give. 297 00:26:55,383 --> 00:26:58,886 - I'm not ready to receive. - Then you give and I'll receive. 298 00:26:59,011 --> 00:27:00,638 I can't receive... 299 00:27:00,763 --> 00:27:03,431 I'm a person who can only receive if another is giving. 300 00:27:03,556 --> 00:27:06,935 - I can't give. I'm sorry. - If we each receive, it might work. 301 00:27:07,060 --> 00:27:12,232 I can't. My trouble is I'm receiving and I'm not able to give or receive. 302 00:27:12,357 --> 00:27:16,486 - I would give if you could receive. - I don't know how I can help you. 303 00:27:16,611 --> 00:27:21,490 - If we both receive or both give... - I can't receive and I can't give. 304 00:27:21,615 --> 00:27:25,744 It's not going to work out. It's no use, Fielding. I'm sorry. 305 00:27:25,869 --> 00:27:28,956 Goodbye. I'm sorry if I hurt you. 306 00:27:31,291 --> 00:27:34,670 Don't worry about me, sweetheart. I'm like a cat. 307 00:27:34,795 --> 00:27:37,131 I'll always wind up on my feet. 308 00:27:40,759 --> 00:27:44,470 Can you believe that? She says I'm not leader enough for her. 309 00:27:44,595 --> 00:27:48,182 - Who's she looking for - Hitler? - Women are very temperamental. 310 00:27:48,308 --> 00:27:52,020 We went everyplace together. We did everything. We fell in love. 311 00:27:52,145 --> 00:27:55,857 - I fell in love. She just stood there. - Did you have trouble in bed? 312 00:27:55,982 --> 00:28:01,404 You kidding? Do I look like the kind of guy that'd have trouble in bed? 313 00:28:01,529 --> 00:28:05,073 - I didn't. I didn't. - Was that any reason to quit the job? 314 00:28:05,198 --> 00:28:09,536 I'm so depressed. I'd kill myself if I thought that she would marry me. 315 00:28:09,661 --> 00:28:12,748 - What are you gonna do? - I gotta get out of here. 316 00:28:12,873 --> 00:28:14,916 I'm going down to San Marcos. 317 00:28:15,042 --> 00:28:18,962 We were gonna go down there together. We were gonna write a paper on it. 318 00:28:19,087 --> 00:28:21,298 She was gonna write it. I was gonna type it. 319 00:28:21,423 --> 00:28:24,091 I gotta see what conditions down there are like. 320 00:28:24,216 --> 00:28:26,260 Jesus. Life is so cruel. 321 00:28:27,511 --> 00:28:29,138 See what I mean? 322 00:28:32,224 --> 00:28:34,477 - Hi, Mom. Hi, Dad. - Fielding. 323 00:28:34,602 --> 00:28:35,811 Sponge. 324 00:28:35,936 --> 00:28:40,066 I wanted to tell you that tomorrow I'll be going out of the country. 325 00:28:40,191 --> 00:28:43,486 What? Why are you going out of the country now? 326 00:28:43,610 --> 00:28:47,947 - It's a very long story... - Martin, Martin. A girl? 327 00:28:48,073 --> 00:28:52,035 - So what are you gonna do? - I'm going down to South America. 328 00:28:52,160 --> 00:28:56,081 - To a country called San Marcos. - I've never heard of it, dear. 329 00:28:56,206 --> 00:29:00,043 - And... - Are they nice people there? 330 00:29:00,168 --> 00:29:05,422 Nice? It's a turbulent situation and I've been following it for a while. 331 00:29:05,547 --> 00:29:09,051 Sure you have. You should've stayed in school and followed study. 332 00:29:09,176 --> 00:29:12,471 - I have a son myself... - Will you stay out of this, please? 333 00:29:12,596 --> 00:29:13,931 Sorry. 334 00:29:14,056 --> 00:29:16,517 Ruth, don't talk to him about going away. 335 00:29:16,642 --> 00:29:20,562 Talk to him about becoming a doctor. Who will I leave this hospital to? 336 00:29:20,688 --> 00:29:24,732 Will you cool it, Martin? Don't get on his back. Let him alone. 337 00:29:24,857 --> 00:29:27,568 Dr Mellish, you should let him have his own way. 338 00:29:27,694 --> 00:29:34,117 Ruth, we've been married 27 years. My name isn't Martin. It's Al. 339 00:29:34,242 --> 00:29:36,077 AI Mellish, remember? 340 00:29:36,202 --> 00:29:38,663 I wanted my son to be a great surgeon. 341 00:29:38,788 --> 00:29:41,249 - I have no aptitude... - Yes, you do, son. 342 00:29:41,374 --> 00:29:45,502 Listen to me, son. You can do this. You can be a fine surgeon. 343 00:29:45,627 --> 00:29:49,673 - Look, take over. Give me a clamp. - Fielding can't... Clamp, clamp. 344 00:29:49,798 --> 00:29:52,050 Give me that. Here, take this, son. 345 00:29:52,217 --> 00:29:54,469 - Martin... - Finish this operation for me. 346 00:29:54,594 --> 00:29:59,766 - No, I can't. It's ridiculous. - Why are you bossing Fielding? 347 00:29:59,891 --> 00:30:04,563 - It's so ridiculous. - You know Fielding. 348 00:30:04,688 --> 00:30:10,818 Sponge. Jesus. I'll finish this one, but... I didn't even wash. 349 00:30:10,943 --> 00:30:13,195 - Right there. - I've got it in there. 350 00:30:13,321 --> 00:30:17,033 - Now take the clamp and take it out. - Should that be blue like that? 351 00:30:17,158 --> 00:30:18,826 - Where? - Right there. 352 00:30:18,951 --> 00:30:21,620 - Fielding, go. - Wait one second. 353 00:30:21,746 --> 00:30:25,916 - God bless you, but go. - I'm doing my best. He's pressuring me. 354 00:30:26,042 --> 00:30:28,293 - Yes. - Put you're finger right there. 355 00:30:28,418 --> 00:30:32,172 - Fielding, get out of here. - Your father doesn't give you... 356 00:30:32,297 --> 00:30:35,967 - South America... tomorrow. - Go, go. God bless you. 357 00:30:37,135 --> 00:30:39,179 - Go. Gesundheit. - I've got to go. 358 00:30:39,304 --> 00:30:43,266 - You're really going? - You're losing the patient. 359 00:30:43,391 --> 00:30:45,852 - Nurse. - Listen to me. 360 00:30:45,977 --> 00:30:51,315 Could you get me out of here by seven tonight? I'm going to the theatre. 361 00:31:06,080 --> 00:31:10,625 And now, as is our annual custom, 362 00:31:10,750 --> 00:31:15,338 each citizen of San Marcos will come up here 363 00:31:15,463 --> 00:31:21,177 and present His Excellency with his weight in horse manure. 364 00:31:21,761 --> 00:31:24,222 Horse manure? I thought they were diamonds. 365 00:31:24,347 --> 00:31:27,016 - We are an agrarian country. - Yes, but... 366 00:31:27,141 --> 00:31:29,643 We will fertilise your personal crops. 367 00:31:29,768 --> 00:31:32,938 Sometimes food is more valuable than gold. 368 00:32:31,368 --> 00:32:34,079 We captured this rebel soldier, Excellency. 369 00:32:34,204 --> 00:32:38,083 Has he given us any information about when they plan to strike? 370 00:32:38,208 --> 00:32:41,962 Not yet, but he will when our men get through working him over. 371 00:32:49,511 --> 00:32:54,223 We keep playing to him the entire score of Naughty Marietta. 372 00:32:54,349 --> 00:32:57,477 - It will make him talk. - Oh, please. No more. 373 00:32:57,602 --> 00:33:00,855 I can't stand operetta. Please. 374 00:33:00,980 --> 00:33:03,149 Talk and we'll stop the phonograph. 375 00:33:03,274 --> 00:33:07,904 I'll talk. I'll talk. But please turn it off. Please. 376 00:33:08,029 --> 00:33:10,406 When is the revolution set for? 377 00:33:10,531 --> 00:33:12,658 The first week of July. 378 00:33:12,783 --> 00:33:15,786 You're a liar. That's only two months away. 379 00:33:15,911 --> 00:33:22,834 No. Esposito is timing it to coincide with the American Fourth of July 380 00:33:22,960 --> 00:33:26,672 so as to imitate his hero George Washington. 381 00:33:26,797 --> 00:33:28,799 Where does he get weaponry? 382 00:33:28,924 --> 00:33:31,176 Esposito has a way of getting weapons, 383 00:33:31,301 --> 00:33:33,302 but I do not know the plan. 384 00:33:33,427 --> 00:33:37,014 Time is getting short, but I have a plan. 385 00:33:50,027 --> 00:33:55,407 His Excellency requests the pleasure of your company at dinner this evening. 386 00:33:55,532 --> 00:33:58,201 - What? - Dinner at the palace. 8pm. 387 00:34:03,999 --> 00:34:06,251 Dinner with Vargas? 388 00:34:07,585 --> 00:34:09,629 Dinner with the president? 389 00:34:11,006 --> 00:34:14,049 Dinner with the president. 390 00:34:14,174 --> 00:34:16,427 Dinner with the president. 391 00:34:25,769 --> 00:34:28,188 Excuse me, se�or. 392 00:34:28,314 --> 00:34:32,192 I was trying to find someplace for practice. 393 00:34:56,923 --> 00:34:59,176 Se�or Fielding. 394 00:35:01,511 --> 00:35:05,098 This is Colonel Diaz... and Lieutenant Arroyo. 395 00:35:05,223 --> 00:35:10,228 May I say what a great pleasure it is to entertain an American intellectual? 396 00:35:10,354 --> 00:35:15,274 Somebody with whom I can exchange political ideas and opinions. 397 00:35:15,399 --> 00:35:19,111 - I brought you some cake. - Thank you very much. 398 00:35:20,905 --> 00:35:23,366 These are prunes. I like cherry. 399 00:35:23,491 --> 00:35:26,577 They don't make cherry on Tuesday. 400 00:35:26,702 --> 00:35:30,164 Se�or Fielding, dinner is served. Will you please? 401 00:35:57,690 --> 00:36:01,694 May be some poison in my food... but I am OK. 402 00:36:01,819 --> 00:36:06,782 I have been poisoned so many times, I have developed an immunity. 403 00:36:36,519 --> 00:36:38,895 You are not tense... are you? 404 00:36:39,021 --> 00:36:40,772 Tense? No. 405 00:36:53,744 --> 00:36:57,872 - Dinner was delicious. - Thank you, sir. The check, sir. 406 00:36:59,123 --> 00:37:01,792 - Who had the roast beef? - I had. 407 00:37:01,917 --> 00:37:04,378 That's... Who had the corned beef and cabbage? 408 00:37:04,503 --> 00:37:07,923 - That was mine. - I don't understand something. 409 00:37:08,049 --> 00:37:11,344 There's two roast beefs on here. What did you have? 410 00:37:11,469 --> 00:37:14,138 - Chilli con carne. - There's two roast beefs. 411 00:37:14,263 --> 00:37:16,724 - There's an extra roast beef. - I had only one. 412 00:37:16,849 --> 00:37:19,768 - There's one chilli, two roast... - Who had the chilli? 413 00:37:19,893 --> 00:37:23,146 - I had the chilli. - Are you on Diner's Club? 414 00:37:23,271 --> 00:37:26,816 - You have Bank of America? - Yes. 415 00:37:26,942 --> 00:37:29,486 All right. Here. 416 00:37:30,612 --> 00:37:33,281 Let's go to the salon for a brandy. 417 00:37:38,244 --> 00:37:41,372 Can you keep it down? I'm getting a headache. 418 00:37:41,872 --> 00:37:45,542 And so I want to do only what is right 419 00:37:45,668 --> 00:37:47,711 for my people. 420 00:37:47,836 --> 00:37:51,590 That is to protect them from communism. 421 00:37:51,715 --> 00:37:53,759 I am sure you understand that. 422 00:37:53,884 --> 00:37:56,220 Esposito and his rebels are not communists. 423 00:37:56,345 --> 00:38:00,682 - They are communists. - I think I know a bit about politics. 424 00:38:03,434 --> 00:38:06,104 I'll pick it up. Excuse me. 425 00:38:07,438 --> 00:38:10,066 If I give a better life to my people, 426 00:38:10,191 --> 00:38:13,736 I have to exterminate a few troublemakers. 427 00:38:15,238 --> 00:38:17,615 That's the price we pay. 428 00:38:17,740 --> 00:38:21,451 Yeah, well, I gotta be going. It's... Iate for me. 429 00:38:21,576 --> 00:38:25,580 It has been a real pleasure to have this little chat with you. 430 00:38:26,790 --> 00:38:28,834 - Viva San Marcos. - Viva. 431 00:38:28,959 --> 00:38:31,003 Viva. 432 00:38:48,019 --> 00:38:50,896 - He is perfect. - I could kill him now. 433 00:38:52,023 --> 00:38:55,318 He brings cake. He doesn't even bring an assortment. 434 00:38:55,443 --> 00:38:57,278 You cannot forget that? 435 00:38:57,403 --> 00:39:01,531 No, no, we'll kill him as planned - dressed as rebels. 436 00:39:01,656 --> 00:39:03,908 Then an outraged united States 437 00:39:04,034 --> 00:39:08,538 will see how bloodthirsty beasts Esposito and his men are 438 00:39:08,663 --> 00:39:11,291 and we'll get all the support we need. 439 00:39:11,416 --> 00:39:13,668 When can our men get the rebel uniforms? 440 00:39:13,793 --> 00:39:18,757 The tailor is going on vacation, then he needs three days for alterations. 441 00:39:18,882 --> 00:39:22,593 - Too long. We'll get another tailor. - But he does such nice work. 442 00:39:22,718 --> 00:39:26,096 Take a look at this jacket - it was much too big. He took it in for me. 443 00:39:26,221 --> 00:39:30,142 - He doesn't even charge much. - No. We get another tailor. 444 00:39:30,267 --> 00:39:33,270 I want it to look like the rebels killed him 445 00:39:33,395 --> 00:39:35,898 not later than tomorrow afternoon. 446 00:39:39,026 --> 00:39:42,195 - Here he comes. - I don't feel good in these clothes. 447 00:39:42,320 --> 00:39:46,574 Nor do l. He made cuffs in my pants. What kind of tailoring is this? 448 00:39:46,699 --> 00:39:50,411 He's not our regular man. Do the best you can. 449 00:40:33,995 --> 00:40:36,747 So long, suckers. 450 00:40:41,335 --> 00:40:45,755 Hey, wake up. Esposito wants to see you. You all right? Hey, wake up. 451 00:40:45,880 --> 00:40:49,801 Hey, you, wake up. Esposito wants to see you. 452 00:40:49,926 --> 00:40:52,429 Where... Where am l? 453 00:40:52,554 --> 00:40:54,806 Please. No more Polish women. 454 00:40:54,931 --> 00:40:58,101 We are in the rebel camp with Esposito. 455 00:40:58,226 --> 00:41:00,895 Blood. That should be on the inside. 456 00:41:01,021 --> 00:41:04,732 - Esposito wants to see you. Come on. - Esposito tried to kill me. 457 00:41:04,857 --> 00:41:08,777 It was Vargas that tried to kill you, but in the uniforms of our people. 458 00:41:08,902 --> 00:41:13,240 So your government would blame Esposito. Come on. Come on. 459 00:41:41,726 --> 00:41:45,771 - I'm Fielding Mellish. - Vargas has told everyone you are dead. 460 00:41:45,896 --> 00:41:50,192 That we killed you. It is in all the newspapers. 461 00:41:50,317 --> 00:41:54,029 Yeah, well, I'm very much alive and I mean to lodge a formal complaint. 462 00:41:54,154 --> 00:41:55,280 Complaint? 463 00:41:55,405 --> 00:41:59,952 You cannot bash an American citizen without State Department permission. 464 00:42:00,077 --> 00:42:03,914 Vargas cares very little for diplomatic procedures, my friend. 465 00:42:04,039 --> 00:42:08,501 - We'll straighten him out. - I'm afraid you cannot leave here. 466 00:42:08,626 --> 00:42:12,129 He uses you to make a big propaganda against us. 467 00:42:12,254 --> 00:42:16,676 He doesn't want you to show up and tell the world the truth. 468 00:42:16,801 --> 00:42:21,639 So, what do you think will happen if you show your face anyplace but here? 469 00:42:21,764 --> 00:42:24,809 He will cut your throat and bury you. 470 00:42:24,934 --> 00:42:29,271 Cut my throat? Do you realise what that will do to my gargling? 471 00:42:29,396 --> 00:42:32,232 It is war, my friend. 472 00:42:32,357 --> 00:42:35,652 - Yeah, but I'm an American citizen. - Sure. A dead one. 473 00:42:35,777 --> 00:42:38,113 How long before I can go back to New York? 474 00:42:38,238 --> 00:42:41,116 After we win the revolution, we are free. 475 00:42:41,241 --> 00:42:43,493 - When is the revolution? - Six months. 476 00:42:43,618 --> 00:42:46,621 Six months? I got a rented car. 477 00:42:46,745 --> 00:42:50,874 - You have a chance to die for freedom. - Freedom is wonderful. 478 00:42:51,000 --> 00:42:55,296 On the other hand, if you're dead, it's a drawback to your sex life. 479 00:42:55,421 --> 00:42:58,299 - Are you such a snivelling dog? - Depends what you mean. 480 00:42:58,424 --> 00:43:00,467 I'm a good-sized snivelling dog. 481 00:43:02,177 --> 00:43:05,222 History sometimes chooses strange ways. 482 00:43:05,347 --> 00:43:07,599 Today you are fearful. 483 00:43:07,724 --> 00:43:11,227 Perhaps one day you will be a tiger. 484 00:43:11,352 --> 00:43:15,315 Don't hold your breath. If you ever need a squirrel, call me. 485 00:43:16,316 --> 00:43:20,612 All right, men, let us sing the song of the rebels. 486 00:43:20,737 --> 00:43:23,823 Rebels are we, born to be free 487 00:43:23,948 --> 00:43:27,160 Just like the fish in the sea 488 00:43:40,339 --> 00:43:43,634 I'll have the grapefruit sections, two poached eggs, 489 00:43:43,759 --> 00:43:46,595 cinnamon toast and regular coffee. 490 00:43:51,891 --> 00:43:53,643 Perfect. 491 00:43:58,189 --> 00:44:00,524 What the hell is this stuff anyhow? 492 00:44:00,650 --> 00:44:02,693 Lizard. 493 00:44:48,112 --> 00:44:51,823 Uno... dos. Uno... dos. 494 00:44:51,948 --> 00:44:55,868 Uno... dos. Uno... dos. 495 00:44:55,994 --> 00:44:58,037 Uno... dos. 496 00:45:16,221 --> 00:45:19,516 Camouflage can often save yourlife. 497 00:45:19,641 --> 00:45:22,728 It's essential that you learn the art. 498 00:45:46,792 --> 00:45:52,047 In the event of snake bite, you make an incision and suck out the poison. 499 00:45:52,172 --> 00:45:56,092 Remember, you suck out the poison. What do you do? 500 00:45:56,217 --> 00:45:58,345 Suck out the poison. 501 00:45:58,470 --> 00:46:02,140 - Suck out the poison. - Suck out the poison. 502 00:46:03,224 --> 00:46:08,146 I cannot suck anybody's leg who I'm not engaged to. 503 00:46:24,161 --> 00:46:30,376 Snake bite! I got bitten by a snake! I got bitten by a snake! Help! 504 00:46:41,177 --> 00:46:44,389 Our food has run out. We must make a raid on the town. 505 00:46:44,514 --> 00:46:46,891 - It will be very risky. - You must not go. 506 00:46:47,016 --> 00:46:49,894 - I do not mind the risk. - Another will lead the raid. 507 00:46:50,019 --> 00:46:52,855 Not our future president. 508 00:46:52,981 --> 00:46:55,440 - What about sending Fielding? - Me? 509 00:46:55,565 --> 00:46:58,026 The men have a growing respect for you. 510 00:46:58,151 --> 00:47:01,697 - It is a chance to prove yourself. - I don't wanna prove anything. 511 00:47:01,822 --> 00:47:05,659 You will fight a hero and, if necessary, you will die a hero. 512 00:47:05,784 --> 00:47:10,038 Better get some rest, Luis. You're beginning to talk gibberish. 513 00:47:10,163 --> 00:47:12,624 This short straw will go. 514 00:47:20,089 --> 00:47:22,967 Well, as long as it was fair. 515 00:47:47,240 --> 00:47:49,492 - Yes? - Coffee, please. 516 00:47:53,997 --> 00:47:56,874 - I also want something to go. - Yes. 517 00:47:56,999 --> 00:47:59,543 Do you have any grilled cheese sandwiches? 518 00:47:59,668 --> 00:48:03,213 - Yes, sir. - Well, let me have a thousand. 519 00:48:03,339 --> 00:48:09,762 And... 300 tuna fish... and 200 bacon, lettuce and tomato sandwiches. 520 00:48:09,887 --> 00:48:13,599 - You want the cheese on rye? - 490 on rye. 521 00:48:13,724 --> 00:48:19,228 Let me have 1 10 on whole wheat... and 300 on white bread. 522 00:48:19,354 --> 00:48:23,483 - Fernandez wanted on roll. - And one on roll. 523 00:48:24,275 --> 00:48:27,362 - And the tuna? - All the tuna on whole wheat. 524 00:48:27,487 --> 00:48:31,032 All the bacon, lettuce and tomato we'll have on toast. 525 00:48:31,157 --> 00:48:35,495 Right. And... what to drink? 526 00:48:37,412 --> 00:48:43,835 Let me have 700 regular coffees, 500 cokes and 1 ,000 7-ups. 527 00:48:43,961 --> 00:48:46,922 And also coleslaw for 900 men. 528 00:48:47,047 --> 00:48:51,260 Right. You want anything with these sandwiches? 529 00:48:52,636 --> 00:48:54,680 Mayonnaise on the side. 530 00:48:56,223 --> 00:48:58,266 Right. 531 00:49:10,278 --> 00:49:13,573 - Everything is ready, sir. - Which one is the roll? 532 00:49:13,698 --> 00:49:17,201 - I have it right here. - OK. What about the coleslaw? 533 00:49:17,326 --> 00:49:19,828 It's coming, sir. 534 00:49:19,953 --> 00:49:21,997 Adelante. 535 00:49:24,332 --> 00:49:26,376 Coleslaw, sir. 536 00:49:32,924 --> 00:49:36,136 - That will be 24,000 pesos, sir. - Get your money from Vargas. 537 00:49:36,261 --> 00:49:39,972 We're the rebels. Let's go. Move this out. Come on. 538 00:52:45,649 --> 00:52:48,735 While we carry out a diversionary raid, 539 00:52:48,860 --> 00:52:53,573 you three will kidnap the British ambassador. 540 00:52:53,698 --> 00:52:58,161 He will be held until Vargas agrees to free the sympathisers he has jailed. 541 00:52:58,286 --> 00:53:00,205 I will drive. 542 00:53:00,330 --> 00:53:05,292 You two will seize him and you will inject him with sodium pentathol. 543 00:53:05,417 --> 00:53:10,047 Now, once he is asleep... there will be no trouble. 544 00:55:19,128 --> 00:55:22,006 Should they attack, our men are ready. 545 00:55:23,967 --> 00:55:26,427 They are too weak to defeat me. 546 00:55:26,553 --> 00:55:29,638 We have nothing to worry about them. 547 00:55:29,763 --> 00:55:33,058 We shall continue our policy of harassment. 548 00:55:33,183 --> 00:55:38,021 Of course, if they're foolish enough to try to overthrow, 549 00:55:38,146 --> 00:55:42,109 then I have made a deal for reinforcements 550 00:55:42,234 --> 00:55:44,278 with the uJA. 551 00:55:45,237 --> 00:55:47,698 You mean the CIA, Excellency. 552 00:55:47,823 --> 00:55:50,658 The uJA is the united Jewish Appeal. 553 00:55:51,659 --> 00:55:54,328 The united Jewish Appeal? 554 00:56:13,847 --> 00:56:17,142 - Any word on where we're heading? - I hear it's San Marcos. 555 00:56:17,267 --> 00:56:21,396 - For or against the government? - CIA's not taking any chances. 556 00:56:21,521 --> 00:56:25,233 Some of us are for it and some of us are gonna be against it. 557 00:56:25,358 --> 00:56:27,402 Viva San Marcos! 558 00:56:45,252 --> 00:56:49,673 Hello, hello? Miami? Fontainbleau Hotel? 559 00:56:49,798 --> 00:56:54,594 Listen, I want to make a reservation for one single room. Yes. 560 00:57:01,476 --> 00:57:04,145 What are the... What are your prices? 561 00:57:04,270 --> 00:57:06,606 For a single room? 562 00:57:35,132 --> 00:57:37,593 I can't believe it. I'm finally going home. 563 00:57:37,718 --> 00:57:41,847 - Well, you have earned it. - I'm gonna miss everybody. 564 00:57:41,973 --> 00:57:45,476 - Well, my friends, we have done it. - You have. 565 00:57:45,601 --> 00:57:47,645 And you. All of us. 566 00:57:47,770 --> 00:57:52,357 At last this country can finally bask in the sunshine of a true democracia. 567 00:57:52,482 --> 00:57:56,194 Where no man is better than the next and there's equal opportunity. 568 00:57:56,319 --> 00:58:00,198 - Respect for law and order. - Right now, I am the law. 569 00:58:00,323 --> 00:58:04,452 But soon we'll hold elections, let the people choose their leaders 570 00:58:04,578 --> 00:58:09,749 and you can voluntarily step down and return to your simple farming. 571 00:58:09,875 --> 00:58:12,626 What's the matter? You look glassy-eyed. 572 00:58:12,751 --> 00:58:17,172 These people are peasants. They are too ignorant to vote. 573 00:58:17,298 --> 00:58:21,051 - But they have common sense. - I am the ruler of this country. 574 00:58:21,176 --> 00:58:23,762 There will be no elections until I decree it. 575 00:58:32,229 --> 00:58:35,106 You are accused of killing over a thousand people, 576 00:58:35,231 --> 00:58:38,067 of torturing hundreds of women and children. 577 00:58:38,192 --> 00:58:42,614 - How did you plead? - Guilty. With an explanation. 578 00:58:44,908 --> 00:58:49,037 Ready... aim... fire! 579 00:58:50,163 --> 00:58:53,665 That's... 21 . Where's 21? 580 00:59:01,256 --> 00:59:05,385 Ready... aim... fire! 581 00:59:28,282 --> 00:59:30,326 Hear me. 582 00:59:30,451 --> 00:59:33,329 I am your new president. 583 00:59:34,412 --> 00:59:37,082 From this day on, 584 00:59:37,207 --> 00:59:41,461 the official language of San Marcos will be Swedish. 585 00:59:41,586 --> 00:59:44,381 Silence. 586 00:59:44,506 --> 00:59:49,261 In addition to that, all citizens will be required 587 00:59:49,386 --> 00:59:54,140 to change their underwear every half hour. 588 00:59:55,224 --> 01:00:00,187 underwear will be worn on the outside 589 01:00:00,312 --> 01:00:03,190 so we can check. 590 01:00:03,315 --> 01:00:08,654 Furthermore, all children under 16 years old 591 01:00:09,613 --> 01:00:13,742 are now 16 years old. 592 01:00:14,451 --> 01:00:17,287 What's the Spanish word for "straitjacket"? 593 01:00:17,412 --> 01:00:19,998 The power has driven him mad. 594 01:00:20,790 --> 01:00:23,251 We must have a new leader. 595 01:00:23,376 --> 01:00:27,589 Another must represent the revolution immediately. 596 01:00:27,714 --> 01:00:29,048 Who? 597 01:00:29,173 --> 01:00:32,886 Someone willing to put his life in peril 598 01:00:33,011 --> 01:00:35,930 and willing to carry on 599 01:00:36,054 --> 01:00:38,974 against all the terrible hazards that await us. 600 01:00:39,099 --> 01:00:41,184 I know you're gonna find the guy. 601 01:00:41,310 --> 01:00:45,480 Excuse me. I was due at my mother's house for dinner eight months ago. 602 01:00:45,647 --> 01:00:48,525 - I'm going home. - No. The revolution will fail. 603 01:00:48,650 --> 01:00:51,153 - Why me? - Because the men respect you. 604 01:00:51,278 --> 01:00:53,322 You always loved our cause. 605 01:00:53,447 --> 01:00:56,325 Besides, compared to these men, you are educated. 606 01:00:56,450 --> 01:00:59,744 What is this with my education? I had two days of college. 607 01:00:59,869 --> 01:01:03,372 I need three years and 363 days to get a degree. 608 01:01:03,497 --> 01:01:06,918 This is a country of peasants. At least you can read. 609 01:01:07,043 --> 01:01:10,463 I don't want to be president. You're making a big mistake. 610 01:01:10,588 --> 01:01:14,175 You gotta be smart to be a president. Let me be vice-president. 611 01:01:14,300 --> 01:01:16,344 That's a real idiot's job. 612 01:01:16,469 --> 01:01:20,972 You're looking at me in a strange way, fellas. Look, l... 613 01:01:22,057 --> 01:01:24,559 I'm gonna be president, right? 614 01:01:40,908 --> 01:01:43,869 The Americans won't recognise us - they think we're communists. 615 01:01:43,994 --> 01:01:47,248 The communists won't recognise us - they think we're American puppets. 616 01:01:47,373 --> 01:01:51,752 The one person who recognises us was arrested on a morals charge. 617 01:01:51,877 --> 01:01:55,381 - We need money. - What is the chief export of San Marcos? 618 01:01:55,506 --> 01:01:58,841 - Dysentery. - We grow bananas. 619 01:01:58,967 --> 01:02:01,844 Bananas, bananas. 620 01:02:01,970 --> 01:02:06,599 If I could only think of a way to convince the uS to give us money. 621 01:02:07,183 --> 01:02:08,810 Get me Sanchez. 622 01:02:08,935 --> 01:02:13,481 I don't know, my friend. Without it, the revolution will fail. 623 01:02:13,606 --> 01:02:18,944 Thousands will have died in vain and soon a new dictator will seize power. 624 01:02:21,238 --> 01:02:23,282 - Hello? - It's me. 625 01:02:23,407 --> 01:02:25,742 I'm perturbed over the economic situation. 626 01:02:25,868 --> 01:02:28,829 You must go to the united States. You must convince them. 627 01:02:28,954 --> 01:02:30,998 - They will listen to you. - Me? 628 01:02:31,123 --> 01:02:34,042 - You're the president. - Here I'm president. 629 01:02:34,167 --> 01:02:37,462 - Over there I'm a college dropout. - But they don't know. 630 01:02:37,588 --> 01:02:39,630 After all, Fielding Mellish is dead. 631 01:02:39,755 --> 01:02:42,508 I can't hear you. I think we have a bad connection. 632 01:02:42,633 --> 01:02:45,303 Hang up. I will call you back. 633 01:02:48,306 --> 01:02:52,727 I actually think I probably could go to the united States and fake it. 634 01:02:52,852 --> 01:02:55,396 I know you can do it, Fielding. 635 01:02:55,521 --> 01:02:57,523 I'll bet that I could. 636 01:03:15,665 --> 01:03:20,003 I am Mr Hernandez, the official interpreter. 637 01:03:20,128 --> 01:03:23,672 - Welcome to the united States. - Welcome to united States. 638 01:03:23,797 --> 01:03:25,633 - Thank you. - Thank you. 639 01:03:25,758 --> 01:03:28,636 - Did you have a good flight? - Did you have a good flight? 640 01:03:28,761 --> 01:03:31,639 - Yes, I did. - Yes, I did. 641 01:03:31,764 --> 01:03:36,727 - We hope your stay in our country - We hope your stay in our country 642 01:03:36,852 --> 01:03:39,396 - will be delightful. - will be delightful. 643 01:03:39,522 --> 01:03:42,815 - I am looking forward to it - I am looking forward to it 644 01:03:42,941 --> 01:03:47,278 - with great anticipation. - with great anticipation. 645 01:04:12,678 --> 01:04:15,347 I'm Bill Simmons. This is Tom Sloan. FBl. 646 01:04:15,472 --> 01:04:17,933 We're here to see that your safety is ensured. 647 01:04:18,058 --> 01:04:21,562 We'll act as your shield in the event of trouble. 648 01:04:23,396 --> 01:04:26,941 We missed him. We get most of them. 649 01:04:32,613 --> 01:04:35,908 What am I appearing at a fundraising dinner for? 650 01:04:36,033 --> 01:04:38,286 I know nothing about public speaking. 651 01:04:38,411 --> 01:04:41,914 All you have to do is open up with a joke, a funny story. 652 01:04:42,039 --> 01:04:45,542 Once you have them laughing, then you hit them for money. Simple. 653 01:04:45,667 --> 01:04:49,087 Very simple. Open with a funny story, then hit 'em for money. 654 01:04:49,629 --> 01:04:52,007 I'm... I'm reminded tonight of the... 655 01:04:52,132 --> 01:04:55,176 of the farmer who had 656 01:04:55,302 --> 01:05:01,057 incestuous relations with both his daughters simultaneously... 657 01:05:02,851 --> 01:05:05,644 It's the... It's... It's the... 658 01:05:05,769 --> 01:05:09,481 It's the... wrong crowd for this joke. 659 01:05:09,607 --> 01:05:15,654 Although the united States is a very rich country 660 01:05:15,779 --> 01:05:19,074 and San Marcos is a very poor one, 661 01:05:19,200 --> 01:05:22,703 there are a great many things we have to offer your country 662 01:05:22,828 --> 01:05:24,871 in return for aid. 663 01:05:24,996 --> 01:05:28,708 For instance, there are locusts. 664 01:05:28,833 --> 01:05:35,673 We... We have more locusts than... Locusts of all races and creeds... 665 01:05:35,798 --> 01:05:40,345 These locusts, incidentally, are available at popular prices. 666 01:05:41,679 --> 01:05:45,599 So, by the way, are most of the women of San Marcos. 667 01:05:46,558 --> 01:05:51,313 Now, then, despite the tiny size of our nation, 668 01:05:51,438 --> 01:05:55,067 few people realise that we lead the world in hernias. 669 01:05:55,192 --> 01:05:59,321 They also fail to realise that before Columbus discovered your country, 670 01:05:59,446 --> 01:06:02,783 he stopped in San Marcos and contracted a disease 671 01:06:02,908 --> 01:06:06,786 which can today be cured with one shot of penicillin. 672 01:06:06,911 --> 01:06:11,666 - It's the same person, all right. - This all smacks of conspiracy. 673 01:06:11,791 --> 01:06:15,294 You realise what a communist missile base in San Marcos would do to us? 674 01:06:15,419 --> 01:06:17,880 Plus he has a history of subversive acts, 675 01:06:18,005 --> 01:06:20,466 demonstrations, and peace marches. 676 01:06:20,591 --> 01:06:24,846 This man is attempting the overthrow of the united States government. 677 01:06:24,971 --> 01:06:30,141 All right, let's pick him up... and throw the book at him. 678 01:06:32,060 --> 01:06:36,356 We'll make an example of this... hepcat. 679 01:06:42,279 --> 01:06:46,490 Hi. I hope I'm not being pushy, but I have always wanted to meet you. 680 01:06:46,615 --> 01:06:52,329 I... I don't mean to bother you, but I think that you are terrific. 681 01:06:52,454 --> 01:06:57,835 Really terrific. Me and my friends have backed you from the very beginning 682 01:06:57,960 --> 01:07:00,004 of this career of yours. 683 01:07:00,129 --> 01:07:02,631 And l... We... I... I'm awestruck. 684 01:07:02,756 --> 01:07:04,800 I really don't know what to say. 685 01:07:04,925 --> 01:07:10,930 You know, it's very funny, but you remind me of somebody I once knew. 686 01:07:11,055 --> 01:07:16,686 A boy. He... He was really... No, he was really nothing like you. 687 01:07:16,811 --> 01:07:20,899 I mean, you're terrific. He was just this little stupid clown. 688 01:07:21,024 --> 01:07:24,611 Just... I don't know why I even mentioned it, but... 689 01:07:24,736 --> 01:07:32,868 He was... He was... He was an idiot. You know, a real idiot and... 690 01:07:32,993 --> 01:07:38,165 Would you... Would you mind if I kissed you... once? 691 01:07:38,290 --> 01:07:41,793 Could l... kiss you once? 692 01:07:45,631 --> 01:07:50,593 That was wonderful. It was practically a religious experience. 693 01:07:50,718 --> 01:07:53,804 - I have a confession to make. - What, love? 694 01:07:55,640 --> 01:07:58,309 I'm Fielding Mellish. 695 01:07:58,434 --> 01:08:00,478 My God. 696 01:08:01,354 --> 01:08:04,440 I knew something was missing. 697 01:08:04,565 --> 01:08:07,360 Good evening. I'm Roger Grimsby with the news at six. 698 01:08:07,485 --> 01:08:11,613 Top stories - the government brings charges against Fielding Mellish 699 01:08:11,738 --> 01:08:13,782 as a subversive imposter. 700 01:08:13,907 --> 01:08:17,244 New York garbage men are striking for a better class of garbage. 701 01:08:17,369 --> 01:08:20,580 The National Rifle Association declares death a good thing. 702 01:08:20,705 --> 01:08:23,500 Details on these and other stories in a moment. 703 01:08:33,843 --> 01:08:38,013 Fielding Mellish, the President of San Marcos, goes on trial for fraud, 704 01:08:38,138 --> 01:08:41,600 inciting to riot, conspiracy to overthrow the government 705 01:08:41,725 --> 01:08:44,520 and using the word "thighs" in mixed company. 706 01:08:44,645 --> 01:08:49,024 Please rise. Court is now in session. Judge Seymour Watson presiding. 707 01:08:49,149 --> 01:08:51,818 The People versus Fielding Mellish. 708 01:08:52,819 --> 01:08:55,488 I object, Your Honour. This trial is a travesty. 709 01:08:55,613 --> 01:08:58,408 It's a travesty of a mockery of a sham of a mockery 710 01:08:58,533 --> 01:09:00,577 of two mockeries of a sham. 711 01:09:00,702 --> 01:09:04,414 I move for a mistrial. There's not a single homosexual on that jury. 712 01:09:04,539 --> 01:09:06,916 - Yes, there is. - Really? Which one? 713 01:09:07,041 --> 01:09:09,085 Is it the big guy at the end? 714 01:09:09,210 --> 01:09:11,253 Call the first witness. 715 01:09:11,378 --> 01:09:15,299 - And you remember Fielding Mellish? - He's got a record. 716 01:09:15,424 --> 01:09:18,844 He was always being picked up at one demonstration or another. 717 01:09:18,969 --> 01:09:20,804 He's a bad apple, a commie. 718 01:09:20,929 --> 01:09:24,433 A New York Jewish intellectual communist crackpot. 719 01:09:24,558 --> 01:09:27,728 I mean, I don't wanna cast no aspersions. 720 01:09:29,104 --> 01:09:30,730 Your witness. 721 01:09:30,855 --> 01:09:34,984 Officer Dowd, have you ever had sexual relations with a girl 722 01:09:35,109 --> 01:09:37,486 with really big breasts? 723 01:09:37,612 --> 01:09:39,655 Yes, sir. I did. 724 01:09:39,780 --> 01:09:43,492 - And how did you find it? - Very erotic. 725 01:09:43,618 --> 01:09:46,495 I was... I was just checking. 726 01:09:48,623 --> 01:09:50,791 Swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth? 727 01:09:50,917 --> 01:09:52,959 I do. 728 01:09:53,877 --> 01:09:56,338 - Name? - J Edgar Hoover. 729 01:09:56,463 --> 01:09:59,799 - Occupation? - Head of the FBl. 730 01:09:59,925 --> 01:10:02,260 Tell the court why you're dressed like this. 731 01:10:02,385 --> 01:10:06,598 I have many enemies and I rarely go out unless I'm in disguise. 732 01:10:06,723 --> 01:10:09,184 Mr Hoover, in your opinion, 733 01:10:09,309 --> 01:10:13,854 is Fielding Mellish a threat to the security of the united States? 734 01:10:13,979 --> 01:10:16,065 Enough to have his phone tapped. 735 01:10:20,486 --> 01:10:22,530 Hello? 736 01:10:23,906 --> 01:10:25,950 Hello? Who is this? 737 01:10:27,034 --> 01:10:29,495 Who is this? 738 01:10:29,620 --> 01:10:37,001 Hello? Who is this? Can you hold on one second? Walter, it's foryou. 739 01:10:37,126 --> 01:10:42,131 All right, I did it! I did it! I'm guilty! 740 01:10:42,257 --> 01:10:44,509 But I couldn't take it any more. 741 01:10:44,634 --> 01:10:47,011 She kept tormenting me. 742 01:10:47,136 --> 01:10:49,180 Egging me on. 743 01:10:49,305 --> 01:10:51,516 Making a fool of me! 744 01:10:54,935 --> 01:10:57,479 Isn't this Epstein vs Epstein? 745 01:10:59,106 --> 01:11:01,149 I'm sorry, l... 746 01:11:01,275 --> 01:11:03,318 Sorry. 747 01:11:04,444 --> 01:11:07,948 Sorry to disappoint you, but I've known Fielding for years 748 01:11:08,073 --> 01:11:11,034 and he's a warm, wonderful human being. 749 01:11:11,159 --> 01:11:14,453 Would the clerk read that statement back, please? 750 01:11:14,579 --> 01:11:19,500 "I've known Fielding for years and he is a conniving, dishonest little rat." 751 01:11:19,625 --> 01:11:22,920 OK, I just wanted to make sure you were getting it. 752 01:11:23,045 --> 01:11:25,381 You're out of order. 753 01:11:25,506 --> 01:11:28,885 - Name? - Sharon Craig. 754 01:11:29,010 --> 01:11:32,388 - And you are? - Miss America. 755 01:11:32,513 --> 01:11:37,017 O mio babbino caro 756 01:11:37,142 --> 01:11:42,105 Mi piace � bello, bello 757 01:11:42,230 --> 01:11:46,860 Vo'andare in Porta Rossa 758 01:11:46,985 --> 01:11:51,364 A comperarl'anello 759 01:11:51,489 --> 01:11:56,535 Si, si, ci voglio andare 760 01:11:56,660 --> 01:12:01,207 E se I'amassi indarno 761 01:12:01,332 --> 01:12:05,044 Tell the court why you think he is a traitor to this country. 762 01:12:05,169 --> 01:12:09,465 I think Mr Mellish is a traitor to this country because his views 763 01:12:09,590 --> 01:12:13,677 are different from the views of the president and others of his kind. 764 01:12:13,802 --> 01:12:16,638 Differences of opinion should be tolerated, 765 01:12:16,763 --> 01:12:18,806 but not when they're too different. 766 01:12:18,932 --> 01:12:21,809 Then he becomes a subversive mother. 767 01:12:23,228 --> 01:12:25,271 Call Fielding Mellish. 768 01:12:25,980 --> 01:12:29,692 Mr Mellish... what is your nationality? 769 01:12:32,362 --> 01:12:36,281 Well, you might say I have two nationalities. 770 01:12:38,033 --> 01:12:40,285 Are you being coy? 771 01:12:42,371 --> 01:12:47,334 Well, I am an American citizen and also the President of San Marcos. 772 01:12:48,418 --> 01:12:51,713 I would not joke with this court if I were you. 773 01:12:53,257 --> 01:12:56,509 - Wouldn't you or couldn't you? - That's enough. 774 01:12:56,634 --> 01:13:00,137 Does the codename Sapphire mean anything to you? 775 01:13:01,180 --> 01:13:03,808 It doesn't. I swear to God. 776 01:13:03,933 --> 01:13:08,354 You swear to God and yet you have no compunction about teaching evolution. 777 01:13:13,901 --> 01:13:16,779 Where were you on the night of June 23rd? 778 01:13:20,323 --> 01:13:24,035 If you cannot resist disrupting the court, 779 01:13:24,161 --> 01:13:26,705 I order the marshal to bind and gag you. 780 01:13:26,830 --> 01:13:28,915 So you followed Fielding Mellish 781 01:13:29,040 --> 01:13:32,752 and overheard him make treasonous remarks about this country? 782 01:13:32,878 --> 01:13:36,131 - I did. - Your witness. 783 01:13:45,639 --> 01:13:47,683 Yes, I did. 784 01:13:49,310 --> 01:13:52,521 No. I don't remember. 785 01:13:55,983 --> 01:13:58,027 No. 786 01:13:59,486 --> 01:14:02,864 Don't put words in my mouth! 787 01:14:02,989 --> 01:14:04,949 Yes. 788 01:14:05,909 --> 01:14:09,746 Yes, it's true. I lied! 789 01:14:09,871 --> 01:14:14,375 Ladies and gentlemen, you will retire for your verdict. 790 01:14:16,586 --> 01:14:19,379 Good evening. I'm Roger Grimsby with the news at six. 791 01:14:19,505 --> 01:14:21,965 A verdict has been reached in the Mellish case. 792 01:14:22,090 --> 01:14:24,134 I'll have details in one moment. 793 01:14:42,527 --> 01:14:45,613 - Stick in your throat, son? - These cigarettes, Father. 794 01:14:45,738 --> 01:14:48,783 - What brand are you smoking? - These. 795 01:14:48,908 --> 01:14:51,994 Well, those are for sinners. 796 01:14:52,119 --> 01:14:55,414 - Try these New Testament cigarettes. - New Testament? 797 01:14:55,540 --> 01:14:59,669 - They've got the incense filter. - I'll try one. 798 01:15:04,339 --> 01:15:06,591 What do you think? 799 01:15:08,134 --> 01:15:10,387 Good flavour. Smooth, too. 800 01:15:11,638 --> 01:15:15,267 Stick to New Testament cigarettes and all is forgiven. 801 01:15:15,392 --> 01:15:18,061 Thank you, Father. 802 01:15:18,186 --> 01:15:20,437 New Testament cigarettes. 803 01:15:22,565 --> 01:15:24,608 I smoke 'em. 804 01:15:24,733 --> 01:15:27,194 He smokes 'em. 805 01:15:33,617 --> 01:15:37,538 Fielding Mellish was found guilty today on 12 counts of treason 806 01:15:37,663 --> 01:15:40,124 and was sentenced to 15 years in prison. 807 01:15:40,249 --> 01:15:43,042 The judge suspended it in return for their promise 808 01:15:43,168 --> 01:15:46,004 that Mellish will not move into his neighbourhood. 809 01:15:46,129 --> 01:15:49,007 Now this is all over, is there any possibility 810 01:15:49,132 --> 01:15:51,176 that maybe we could get married? 811 01:15:51,301 --> 01:15:53,344 - I'd love to. - Would you? 812 01:15:53,469 --> 01:15:56,973 I mean, being in women's lib, you'll need somebody to support you. 813 01:15:57,098 --> 01:16:00,185 - Fielding, do you love me? - Of course I love you. 814 01:16:00,310 --> 01:16:03,395 No, but do you love me? You know what I mean? 815 01:16:03,520 --> 01:16:05,981 Yes, I love you. I love you. 816 01:16:06,106 --> 01:16:09,610 Can you, like, define the meaning of love? 817 01:16:09,735 --> 01:16:11,987 What do you mean? It's love. I love you. 818 01:16:12,112 --> 01:16:17,159 I want you in a way of cherishing your totality and your otherness 819 01:16:17,284 --> 01:16:21,622 and in the sense of a presence and a being and a whole coming and going 820 01:16:21,747 --> 01:16:25,750 in a room with grapefruit and a love of a thing, of nature 821 01:16:25,875 --> 01:16:30,254 and a sense of not wanting or being jealous of the thing a person possesses. 822 01:16:30,379 --> 01:16:32,381 Do you have any gum? 823 01:16:32,924 --> 01:16:37,053 Good evening. Wide World ofSports is here in the Royal Manhattan Hotel 824 01:16:37,178 --> 01:16:41,516 for a live, on-the-spot telecast of the Fielding Mellish honeymoon. 825 01:16:42,557 --> 01:16:44,810 Mellish and his new bride were married 826 01:16:44,935 --> 01:16:47,604 in a civil ceremony in downtown Manhattan. 827 01:16:47,729 --> 01:16:51,316 The bride wore the traditional virginal white, as did Mellish. 828 01:16:51,441 --> 01:16:56,154 They had dinner and are both now ready for the consummation of their marriage. 829 01:16:56,279 --> 01:16:58,323 The turnout has been gigantic, 830 01:16:58,448 --> 01:17:01,993 and here for a play-by-play description is Howard Cosell. 831 01:17:02,118 --> 01:17:04,370 Take it away, Howard. 832 01:17:09,542 --> 01:17:13,254 You join us with the action just about to start. 833 01:17:13,379 --> 01:17:18,008 Yes, indeed. Here comes the bride and she's got a lot of fans here. 834 01:17:18,133 --> 01:17:21,846 They are tense, but they swell to a tremendous cheer. 835 01:17:21,971 --> 01:17:26,391 And, as I think is apparent, she is in very good physical condition. 836 01:17:26,516 --> 01:17:31,229 And here comes Mellish. Listen to that crowd roar. 837 01:17:31,354 --> 01:17:37,152 He is wearing a green corduroy suit, jogging and bobbing down the aisle, 838 01:17:37,277 --> 01:17:40,155 buttressed by his trainer and his handlers. 839 01:17:40,280 --> 01:17:43,992 The action has started. They approach one another cautiously. 840 01:17:44,117 --> 01:17:46,160 Nothing unique about that. 841 01:17:46,285 --> 01:17:50,622 Now... Mellish begins to make his moves and so does Nancy. 842 01:17:50,747 --> 01:17:53,125 The two are working together closely, 843 01:17:53,250 --> 01:17:55,335 the action growing more rigorous. 844 01:17:55,460 --> 01:17:58,755 It is swift, rhythmic, coordinated. 845 01:17:58,881 --> 01:18:02,551 What's that? A cut over Mellish's right eye. 846 01:18:02,676 --> 01:18:05,136 The doctor comes in to examine the cut. 847 01:18:05,261 --> 01:18:07,513 No, it will not be stopped. It continues. 848 01:18:07,638 --> 01:18:12,226 I tell you, ladies and gentlemen, I've never seen action like this. 849 01:18:13,436 --> 01:18:15,480 That's it. It's over. 850 01:18:15,605 --> 01:18:19,150 It's all over. The marriage has been consummated. 851 01:18:19,275 --> 01:18:23,779 Nancy and Fielding Mellish, in the most real sense, are now man and wife. 852 01:18:23,905 --> 01:18:28,366 If it's humanly possible, I'll break through these fans to talk to the two. 853 01:18:28,492 --> 01:18:30,952 Excuse me. Excuse me. 854 01:18:31,077 --> 01:18:33,580 Nancy, I know that this is very personal, 855 01:18:33,705 --> 01:18:36,750 but was it everything you expected? 856 01:18:36,875 --> 01:18:41,505 Well, Howard, it all went by so fast. I had no idea that it'd be so quick. 857 01:18:41,630 --> 01:18:44,299 I was expecting a longer bout. 858 01:18:44,424 --> 01:18:46,884 No difficulties of any kind? 859 01:18:47,009 --> 01:18:53,265 Well, as you know, I'm extraordinarily ticklish so I had a rough time there. 860 01:18:53,390 --> 01:18:56,894 I couldn't stop laughing. I thought it'd really get in my way. 861 01:18:57,019 --> 01:19:00,815 But I really trained well for this and I think it held me 862 01:19:00,940 --> 01:19:04,360 so there really wasn't any time that I didn't feel in control. 863 01:19:04,485 --> 01:19:07,570 How about you, Fielding? I was concerned about that cut. 864 01:19:07,695 --> 01:19:10,782 I thought they might stop the action. Did you feel that? 865 01:19:10,907 --> 01:19:13,993 Yes. I thought that I'd have to finish it up quick. 866 01:19:14,118 --> 01:19:16,579 I thought the referee might come in and stop it. 867 01:19:16,704 --> 01:19:18,748 I knew I was leading at that point 868 01:19:18,873 --> 01:19:22,752 and I was just hoping that they'd let me go all the way and I did. 869 01:19:22,877 --> 01:19:27,506 - No disappointments at all? - I had heard he'd be in great shape. 870 01:19:27,631 --> 01:19:30,759 And I felt that he... he wasn't, 871 01:19:30,884 --> 01:19:33,387 that he could use a little seasoning. 872 01:19:33,512 --> 01:19:37,015 The timing was a little off, but I think he'll be fine. 873 01:19:37,141 --> 01:19:40,978 He's not the worst I've had. Not the best, but not the worst. 874 01:19:41,103 --> 01:19:43,981 Are you offended by what Nancy just said, Fielding? 875 01:19:44,106 --> 01:19:47,067 I'm not offended, but I don't agree. I was in great shape. 876 01:19:47,192 --> 01:19:51,487 I thought I had her in real trouble with the right hand. I was in good form. 877 01:19:51,612 --> 01:19:55,074 My breathing was good. I've been training very hard for this. 878 01:19:55,199 --> 01:19:57,243 I just gave a hundred per cent. 879 01:19:57,368 --> 01:19:59,412 When do you anticipate your next bout? 880 01:19:59,537 --> 01:20:03,666 I think we could probably do this again in the late spring. 881 01:20:03,791 --> 01:20:05,835 - Are you... - In the late spring? 882 01:20:05,960 --> 01:20:09,504 Well, I think I'll be ready by the late spring... 883 01:20:09,629 --> 01:20:11,882 As long as the late spring? 884 01:20:12,007 --> 01:20:14,885 I think we should leave the happy couple on that note. 885 01:20:15,010 --> 01:20:18,054 It's hard to tell what may happen in the future. 886 01:20:18,180 --> 01:20:22,100 They may live happily ever after. Again, they may not. 887 01:20:22,225 --> 01:20:27,397 Be assured of this, though. Wherever the action is, we will be there 888 01:20:27,522 --> 01:20:30,316 with ABC's Wide World ofSports to cover it. 889 01:20:30,441 --> 01:20:32,943 Now, on behalf of Nancy and Fielding Mellish 890 01:20:33,068 --> 01:20:35,571 and the others who have made this possible, 891 01:20:35,696 --> 01:20:38,908 this is Howard Cosell thanking you for joining us 892 01:20:39,033 --> 01:20:43,829 and wishing you a most pleasant good night.