1
00:00:14,275 --> 00:00:20,531
# See them
tumbling down #

2
00:00:20,573 --> 00:00:24,327
# Pledging their love
to the ground #

3
00:00:24,368 --> 00:00:26,746
A way out west
there was this fella,

4
00:00:26,787 --> 00:00:29,040
fella I want
to tell you about,

5
00:00:29,081 --> 00:00:32,543
fella by the name
of Jeff Lebowski,

6
00:00:32,585 --> 00:00:34,420
at least that
was the handle

7
00:00:34,462 --> 00:00:36,339
That his loving parents
gave him.

8
00:00:36,380 --> 00:00:39,258
But he never had
much use for it himself.

9
00:00:39,300 --> 00:00:43,137
This Lebowski,
he called himself The Dude.

10
00:00:43,179 --> 00:00:46,932
Now Dude, that's a name
no one would self-apply

11
00:00:46,974 --> 00:00:48,851
where I come from.

12
00:00:48,893 --> 00:00:51,228
But then, there was
a lot about The Dude

13
00:00:51,270 --> 00:00:54,148
that didn't make a whole
lot of sense to me,

14
00:00:54,190 --> 00:00:56,942
and a lot about
where he lived, likewise.

15
00:00:56,984 --> 00:00:58,819
# Along with the
tumbling tumbleweed #

16
00:00:58,861 --> 00:01:00,321
But then again,

17
00:01:00,363 --> 00:01:04,283
maybe that's why I found the
place so dern interesting.

18
00:01:08,079 --> 00:01:12,333
They call Los Angeles
The City of Angels.

19
00:01:12,375 --> 00:01:15,252
I didn't find it
to be that exactly.

20
00:01:15,294 --> 00:01:19,048
But I'll allow there
are some nice folks there.

21
00:01:19,090 --> 00:01:21,842
'Course I can't
say I seen London,

22
00:01:21,884 --> 00:01:23,719
And I never
been to France,

23
00:01:23,761 --> 00:01:26,639
And I ain't never seen no
queen in her damned undies

24
00:01:26,681 --> 00:01:28,641
as the fella says.

25
00:01:28,683 --> 00:01:30,518
But I'll tell you what,

26
00:01:30,559 --> 00:01:32,436
after seeing Los Angeles

27
00:01:32,478 --> 00:01:35,856
And this a-here story
I'm about to unfold,

28
00:01:35,898 --> 00:01:38,734
Well, I guess
I seen somethin'

29
00:01:38,776 --> 00:01:40,152
every bit as stupefyin'

30
00:01:40,194 --> 00:01:42,530
as you'd see in any
of those other places,

31
00:01:42,571 --> 00:01:44,949
and in English, too.

32
00:01:44,991 --> 00:01:47,827
So I can die
with a smile on my face

33
00:01:47,868 --> 00:01:51,247
without feeling like
the good Lord gypped me.

34
00:01:51,288 --> 00:01:53,624
Now this here story
I'm about to unfold

35
00:01:53,666 --> 00:01:56,544
took place back
in the early nineties,

36
00:01:56,585 --> 00:01:58,921
just about the time of
our conflict with Saddam

37
00:01:58,963 --> 00:02:00,840
and the Iraqis.

38
00:02:00,881 --> 00:02:04,552
I only mention it 'cause
sometimes there's a man,

39
00:02:04,593 --> 00:02:06,554
I won't say a hero,

40
00:02:06,595 --> 00:02:08,556
'Cause what's a hero?

41
00:02:08,597 --> 00:02:10,933
But sometimes
there's a man,

42
00:02:10,975 --> 00:02:13,853
and I'm talking
about The Dude here,

43
00:02:13,894 --> 00:02:16,647
sometimes there's a man,

44
00:02:18,065 --> 00:02:20,943
he's the man
for his time and place.

45
00:02:20,985 --> 00:02:23,946
He fits right in there,

46
00:02:23,988 --> 00:02:25,823
and that's The Dude,

47
00:02:25,865 --> 00:02:27,742
in Los Angeles.

48
00:02:27,783 --> 00:02:31,120
And even if
he's a lazy man,

49
00:02:31,162 --> 00:02:33,539
and The Dude was
most certainly that,

50
00:02:33,581 --> 00:02:36,917
quite possibly the laziest
in Los Angeles county,

51
00:02:36,959 --> 00:02:38,836
which would place him
high in the running

52
00:02:38,878 --> 00:02:41,756
for laziest worldwide.

53
00:02:41,797 --> 00:02:44,550
But sometimes
there's a man,

54
00:02:44,592 --> 00:02:47,845
sometimes...
There's a man.

55
00:02:47,887 --> 00:02:52,224
Wow, lost my train
of thought here.

56
00:02:52,266 --> 00:02:55,019
But, hell.

57
00:02:55,061 --> 00:02:57,438
I done introduced
him enough.

58
00:02:57,480 --> 00:02:58,939
All for
a collective action.

59
00:02:58,981 --> 00:03:00,858
This will not stand.

60
00:03:02,360 --> 00:03:04,820
this aggression
against Kuwait.

61
00:03:04,862 --> 00:03:10,451
# Here on the range
I belong #

62
00:03:10,493 --> 00:03:15,748
# Drifting along
with the tumbling #

63
00:03:15,790 --> 00:03:22,588
# Tumbleweed #

64
00:03:32,974 --> 00:03:35,351
Where's the money,
Lebowski?

65
00:03:35,393 --> 00:03:37,645
I want that money,
Lebowski.

66
00:03:37,687 --> 00:03:40,231
Bunny says you're
good for it.

67
00:03:40,272 --> 00:03:45,444
Where's the money,
Lebowski?

68
00:03:45,486 --> 00:03:47,446
Where's the fucking
money, shithead?!

69
00:03:47,488 --> 00:03:49,323
Well, it's

70
00:03:50,366 --> 00:03:52,743
It's down there somewhere.
let me take another look.

71
00:03:52,785 --> 00:03:56,288
Don't fuck with us!

72
00:03:57,581 --> 00:03:59,417
Your wife owes money
to Jackie Treehorn,

73
00:03:59,458 --> 00:04:02,336
That means you own
money to Jackie Treehorn.

74
00:04:02,378 --> 00:04:05,297
Ever thus to
deadbeats, Lebowski.

75
00:04:05,589 --> 00:04:07,675
No, no, don't do that-

76
00:04:08,467 --> 00:04:10,344
Not on the rug, man.

77
00:04:11,387 --> 00:04:12,847
See what happens,
Lebowski?

78
00:04:12,888 --> 00:04:14,724
You see what happens?

79
00:04:14,765 --> 00:04:16,142
Nobody calls me
Lebowski.

80
00:04:16,183 --> 00:04:19,520
You got the wrong guy.
I'm The Dude, man.

81
00:04:19,562 --> 00:04:21,439
Your name's
Lebowski, Lebowski.

82
00:04:21,480 --> 00:04:23,357
Your wife is Bunny.

83
00:04:23,399 --> 00:04:26,736
My wife-
my wife Bunny?

84
00:04:26,777 --> 00:04:29,155
Do you see a wedding
ring on my finger?

85
00:04:29,196 --> 00:04:30,948
Does this place look
like I'm fucking married?

86
00:04:30,990 --> 00:04:33,492
The toilet seat's up,
man.

87
00:04:41,083 --> 00:04:43,044
What the fuck
is this?

88
00:04:43,085 --> 00:04:46,088
Obviously,
you're not a golfer.

89
00:04:49,759 --> 00:04:52,970
Isn't this guy supposed
to be a millionaire?

90
00:04:55,181 --> 00:04:57,933
Yeah, what do you think?

91
00:04:57,975 --> 00:04:59,852
He looks like
a fucking loser.

92
00:04:59,894 --> 00:05:02,730
Hey, at least
I'm housebroken.

93
00:05:02,772 --> 00:05:04,649
Fucking time wasted.

94
00:05:04,690 --> 00:05:06,859
Thanks a lot,
asshole.

95
00:05:35,388 --> 00:05:38,724
# The man in me will do #

96
00:05:38,766 --> 00:05:42,019
# Nearly any task #

97
00:05:42,061 --> 00:05:44,939
# And as for compensation #

98
00:05:44,981 --> 00:05:47,817
# There's a little
he would ask #

99
00:05:47,858 --> 00:05:51,153
# Take a woman like you #

100
00:05:51,195 --> 00:05:53,531
# To get through #

101
00:05:53,572 --> 00:05:56,075
# To the man in me #

102
00:05:58,869 --> 00:06:02,123
# The storm clouds
are raging #

103
00:06:02,164 --> 00:06:04,792
# All around my door #

104
00:06:05,584 --> 00:06:07,420
# I think to myself #

105
00:06:07,461 --> 00:06:11,340
# I might not
take it anymore #

106
00:06:11,382 --> 00:06:14,218
# Take a woman
like your kind #

107
00:06:14,260 --> 00:06:19,265
# To find the man in me #

108
00:06:20,975 --> 00:06:23,853
# But, oh #

109
00:06:23,894 --> 00:06:26,772
# What a wonderful feeling #

110
00:06:28,190 --> 00:06:32,987
# Just to know
that you are near #

111
00:06:34,488 --> 00:06:39,368
# That sets
my heart a-reelin' #

112
00:06:40,161 --> 00:06:43,122
# From my toes #

113
00:06:43,164 --> 00:06:46,917
# Up to my ears #

114
00:06:46,959 --> 00:06:50,254
# The man in me
will hide sometimes #

115
00:06:50,296 --> 00:06:53,132
# To keep from being seen #

116
00:06:53,174 --> 00:06:55,051
# But that's just because #

117
00:06:55,092 --> 00:06:59,430
# He doesn't want to
turn into some machine #

118
00:06:59,472 --> 00:07:02,350
# Take a woman like you #

119
00:07:02,391 --> 00:07:04,226
# To get through #

120
00:07:04,268 --> 00:07:06,270
# To the man in me #

121
00:07:10,566 --> 00:07:12,026
I'm throwing
rocks tonight.

122
00:07:12,068 --> 00:07:13,444
Mark it, Dude.

123
00:07:13,486 --> 00:07:15,821
This was a valued rug.

124
00:07:17,365 --> 00:07:19,742
Yeah, man, it really
tied the room together.

125
00:07:19,784 --> 00:07:21,619
So this was
a valued

126
00:07:21,661 --> 00:07:23,037
What tied the room
together, Dude?

127
00:07:23,079 --> 00:07:24,038
My rug.

128
00:07:24,080 --> 00:07:25,456
Were you listening to
The Dude's story, Donny?

129
00:07:25,498 --> 00:07:26,457
What?

130
00:07:26,499 --> 00:07:27,833
Were you listening
to The Dude's story?

131
00:07:27,875 --> 00:07:29,335
I was bowling.

132
00:07:29,377 --> 00:07:31,754
So you have no frame
of reference here, Donny.

133
00:07:31,796 --> 00:07:33,130
You're like a child

134
00:07:33,172 --> 00:07:34,632
who wanders in
in the middle of a movie-

135
00:07:34,674 --> 00:07:35,549
Walter, what's
the point, man?

136
00:07:35,591 --> 00:07:37,426
There's no reason-
here's my point, Dude-

137
00:07:37,468 --> 00:07:38,844
There's no fucking reason-

138
00:07:38,886 --> 00:07:40,346
Yeah, Walter,
what's your point?

139
00:07:40,763 --> 00:07:42,223
Walter, what
is the point-

140
00:07:42,264 --> 00:07:44,141
Look, we all know
who is at fault here.

141
00:07:44,183 --> 00:07:46,018
What the fuck are
you talking about?

142
00:07:46,060 --> 00:07:47,937
No, what
the fuck are you-

143
00:07:47,979 --> 00:07:49,939
I'm not-

144
00:07:49,981 --> 00:07:52,358
We're talking about unchecked
aggression here, Dude.

145
00:07:52,400 --> 00:07:53,734
What the fuck is
he talking about?

146
00:07:53,776 --> 00:07:54,819
My rug.

147
00:07:54,860 --> 00:07:56,237
Forget it, Donny.
you're out of your element.

148
00:07:56,278 --> 00:07:58,155
Walter, the chinaman
who peed on my rug,

149
00:07:58,197 --> 00:08:00,157
I can't go
give him a bill.

150
00:08:00,199 --> 00:08:01,951
So what the fuck
are you talking about?

151
00:08:01,993 --> 00:08:03,327
What the fuck
are you talking about?

152
00:08:03,369 --> 00:08:05,246
The chinaman is not
the issue here, Dude.

153
00:08:05,287 --> 00:08:07,123
I'm talking about drawing
a line in the sand, Dude.

154
00:08:07,164 --> 00:08:09,542
Across this line,
you do not-

155
00:08:09,583 --> 00:08:12,920
Also, Dude, chinaman is not
the preferred nomenclature.

156
00:08:12,962 --> 00:08:14,839
Asian-american,
please.

157
00:08:14,880 --> 00:08:17,758
Walter, this isn't a guy
who built the railroads here,

158
00:08:17,800 --> 00:08:19,135
this is a guy-

159
00:08:19,176 --> 00:08:20,636
What the fuck
are you talking-

160
00:08:20,678 --> 00:08:22,054
Walter,
he peed on my rug.

161
00:08:22,096 --> 00:08:24,056
He peed on
The Dude's rug.

162
00:08:24,098 --> 00:08:25,933
Donny, you're
out of your element.

163
00:08:25,975 --> 00:08:28,352
Dude, the chinaman
is not the issue here.

164
00:08:28,394 --> 00:08:29,353
So, who

165
00:08:29,395 --> 00:08:30,730
Jeff Lebowski.

166
00:08:30,771 --> 00:08:32,148
The other
Jeffrey Lebowski,

167
00:08:32,189 --> 00:08:34,025
the millionaire.

168
00:08:34,066 --> 00:08:35,026
That's fucking
interesting, man.

169
00:08:36,485 --> 00:08:38,821
Plus, he has
the wealth, obviously,

170
00:08:38,863 --> 00:08:40,323
and the resources,

171
00:08:40,364 --> 00:08:41,741
so that
there's no reason-

172
00:08:41,782 --> 00:08:43,242
there's no
fucking reason

173
00:08:43,284 --> 00:08:44,618
why his wife
should go out

174
00:08:44,660 --> 00:08:45,619
and owe money
all over town,

175
00:08:45,661 --> 00:08:46,537
and then they come

176
00:08:46,579 --> 00:08:48,539
and they pee on
your fucking rug!

177
00:08:48,581 --> 00:08:49,457
Am I wrong? No.

178
00:08:49,498 --> 00:08:50,458
Am I wrong?

179
00:08:50,499 --> 00:08:51,334
Yeah, but-

180
00:08:51,375 --> 00:08:53,336
Ok, then. Ahem.

181
00:08:53,377 --> 00:08:55,254
That rug really tied
the room together,

182
00:08:55,296 --> 00:08:57,131
Did it not?

183
00:08:57,173 --> 00:08:58,049
Fuckin' a!

184
00:08:58,090 --> 00:08:59,425
And this guy
peed on it.

185
00:08:59,467 --> 00:09:00,426
Donny, please.

186
00:09:00,468 --> 00:09:01,844
You know, this
is the fucking guy-

187
00:09:01,886 --> 00:09:03,346
I could find this
fucking Lebowski guy.

188
00:09:03,387 --> 00:09:04,722
His name is Lebowski?

189
00:09:04,764 --> 00:09:06,223
That's your name, Dude.

190
00:09:06,265 --> 00:09:07,642
This is the guy

191
00:09:07,683 --> 00:09:09,518
who should compensate me
for the fucking rug.

192
00:09:09,560 --> 00:09:11,020
His wife goes out

193
00:09:11,062 --> 00:09:12,438
and owes money
all over town,

194
00:09:12,480 --> 00:09:13,856
and they pee on my rug?

195
00:09:13,898 --> 00:09:15,858
They pee on
your fucking rug.

196
00:09:17,276 --> 00:09:18,694
That's right, Dude.

197
00:09:23,574 --> 00:09:24,825
This is the study.

198
00:09:24,867 --> 00:09:26,744
As you can see,
the various commendations...

199
00:09:26,786 --> 00:09:28,746
" Jeffrey Lebowski. "

200
00:09:28,788 --> 00:09:31,123
Honorary degrees,
etcetera.

201
00:09:31,165 --> 00:09:32,541
Very impressive.

202
00:09:32,583 --> 00:09:34,919
Please feel free
to inspect them.

203
00:09:34,960 --> 00:09:36,837
No, I'm
not really that-

204
00:09:37,880 --> 00:09:39,757
That is the key to
the city of Pasadena,

205
00:09:39,799 --> 00:09:41,634
Which Mr. Lebowski
received 2 years ago

206
00:09:41,676 --> 00:09:44,637
In recognition of
his various civic...

207
00:09:44,679 --> 00:09:47,056
That's the Los Angeles

208
00:09:47,098 --> 00:09:49,058
Chamber of Commerce
Business Achiever Award,

209
00:09:49,100 --> 00:09:50,434
which is given-

210
00:09:50,476 --> 00:09:51,727
not necessarily given every year.

211
00:09:51,769 --> 00:09:55,147
Is this him with Nancy?

212
00:09:55,189 --> 00:09:57,024
Yes, indeed,
that is Mr. Lebowski

213
00:09:57,066 --> 00:09:59,026
with the first lady, yes.
it was taken when-

214
00:09:59,068 --> 00:10:01,821
That's Lebowski
on the left there?

215
00:10:01,862 --> 00:10:03,823
Yeah, of course.
Mr. Lebowski on the left-

216
00:10:03,864 --> 00:10:05,241
so he's a cripple-

217
00:10:05,282 --> 00:10:07,618
you know,
a handicapped guy?

218
00:10:07,660 --> 00:10:09,537
Mr. Lebowski
is disabled, yes.

219
00:10:09,578 --> 00:10:11,038
This picture
was taken

220
00:10:11,080 --> 00:10:13,457
when Mrs. Reagan was
first lady of the nation,

221
00:10:13,499 --> 00:10:15,835
Yes, yes.
Not of California.

222
00:10:15,876 --> 00:10:16,836
Pope John.

223
00:10:16,877 --> 00:10:18,629
In fact, he met
privately with the President,

224
00:10:18,671 --> 00:10:19,547
though unfortunately,

225
00:10:19,588 --> 00:10:21,549
There wasn't enough time
for a photo opportunity.

226
00:10:21,590 --> 00:10:22,925
Oh, Nancy's pretty good.

227
00:10:22,967 --> 00:10:24,844
Oh, wonderful woman.
we're very happy-

228
00:10:25,886 --> 00:10:28,222
those are Mr. Lebowski's
children, so to speak.

229
00:10:28,264 --> 00:10:30,141
Different mothers?

230
00:10:30,182 --> 00:10:31,642
Racially, pretty cool.

231
00:10:33,060 --> 00:10:34,937
They're not literally
his children.

232
00:10:34,979 --> 00:10:37,356
They're the little
Lebowski Urban Achievers,

233
00:10:37,398 --> 00:10:38,858
Inner-city children
of promise

234
00:10:38,899 --> 00:10:40,234
but without
the necessary means for-

235
00:10:40,276 --> 00:10:42,236
necessary means for
a higher education.

236
00:10:42,278 --> 00:10:44,155
So Mr. Lebowski
is committed

237
00:10:44,196 --> 00:10:45,948
to sending all
of them to college.

238
00:10:45,990 --> 00:10:46,949
Excuse me.

239
00:10:46,991 --> 00:10:48,826
Thank you. Thank you.

240
00:10:48,868 --> 00:10:49,744
Far out.

241
00:10:49,785 --> 00:10:51,746
Think he's got room
for one more?

242
00:10:51,787 --> 00:10:52,621
One...

243
00:10:54,665 --> 00:10:56,125
You never
went to college.

244
00:10:56,167 --> 00:10:57,543
Please,
don't touch that.

245
00:10:57,585 --> 00:10:59,253
Yeah, no, I did,
but, you know,

246
00:10:59,295 --> 00:11:01,130
I spent most
of my time,

247
00:11:01,172 --> 00:11:03,049
occupying various
administration buildings,

248
00:11:03,090 --> 00:11:05,426
smoking a lot
of thai stick,

249
00:11:05,468 --> 00:11:06,927
breaking into
the R.O.T.C.,

250
00:11:06,969 --> 00:11:08,346
and bowling.

251
00:11:08,387 --> 00:11:09,847
to tell you
the truth, Brandt,

252
00:11:09,889 --> 00:11:11,223
I don't remember
most of it.

253
00:11:15,978 --> 00:11:19,857
Ok, sir, you're a Lebowski,
I'm a Lebowski,

254
00:11:19,899 --> 00:11:20,733
That's terrific.

255
00:11:20,775 --> 00:11:25,029
But I'm very busy,
as I imagine you are.

256
00:11:25,071 --> 00:11:26,947
What can I
do for you, sir?

257
00:11:26,989 --> 00:11:28,824
Well, sir,
it's,

258
00:11:28,866 --> 00:11:30,326
this rug I have.

259
00:11:30,368 --> 00:11:32,828
It really tied
the room together.

260
00:11:32,870 --> 00:11:34,747
You told Brandt on
the phone, he told me.

261
00:11:34,789 --> 00:11:37,124
Where do I fit in?

262
00:11:37,166 --> 00:11:38,542
Well, they were-

263
00:11:38,584 --> 00:11:39,919
They were looking
for you, these 2 guys.

264
00:11:41,379 --> 00:11:42,338
I'll say it again.

265
00:11:42,380 --> 00:11:45,257
You told Brandt on
the phone, he told me.

266
00:11:45,299 --> 00:11:47,134
I know what happened.
Yes? Yes?

267
00:11:47,176 --> 00:11:48,552
Oh, so you know that

268
00:11:48,594 --> 00:11:50,554
They were trying
to piss on your rug?

269
00:11:50,596 --> 00:11:52,431
Did I urinate
on your rug?

270
00:11:52,473 --> 00:11:54,350
You mean, did you
personally come

271
00:11:54,392 --> 00:11:55,726
and pee on my rug?

272
00:11:55,768 --> 00:11:57,228
Hello! Do you
speak English, son?

273
00:11:57,269 --> 00:11:58,646
Parla usted ingles?

274
00:11:58,688 --> 00:12:02,024
I'll ask you again.
Did I urinate on your rug?

275
00:12:02,066 --> 00:12:04,944
No, like I said,
Woo peed on my rug.

276
00:12:04,986 --> 00:12:06,737
I just want to
understand this, sir.

277
00:12:06,779 --> 00:12:09,156
Every time a rug
is micturated upon

278
00:12:09,198 --> 00:12:12,034
In this fair city, I have
to compensate the person-

279
00:12:12,076 --> 00:12:13,452
Come on, man,

280
00:12:13,494 --> 00:12:15,454
I'm not trying
to scam anybody here.

281
00:12:15,496 --> 00:12:17,331
You know,
I was just-

282
00:12:17,373 --> 00:12:19,250
You were just
looking for a handout

283
00:12:19,291 --> 00:12:21,127
like every other...

284
00:12:21,168 --> 00:12:24,046
Are you employed,
Mr. Lebowski?

285
00:12:24,088 --> 00:12:25,548
Wait, let me-

286
00:12:25,589 --> 00:12:27,425
let me explain
something to you.

287
00:12:27,466 --> 00:12:30,845
I am not Mr. Lebowski.
You're Mr. Lebowski.

288
00:12:30,886 --> 00:12:33,222
I'm The Dude. So that's
what you call me,

289
00:12:33,264 --> 00:12:36,517
You know, that
or his Dudeness,

290
00:12:36,559 --> 00:12:39,437
Or Duder or you
know el Duderino,

291
00:12:39,478 --> 00:12:42,231
If you're not into
the whole brevity thing.

292
00:12:42,273 --> 00:12:45,151
Are you employed, sir?

293
00:12:45,192 --> 00:12:46,652
Employed?

294
00:12:48,195 --> 00:12:49,530
You don't go out
looking for a job

295
00:12:49,572 --> 00:12:51,949
dressed like that,
do you, on a weekday?

296
00:12:51,991 --> 00:12:54,827
Is this a-
what day is this?

297
00:12:54,869 --> 00:12:56,746
Well, I do work, sir.

298
00:12:56,787 --> 00:12:58,247
So if you don't mind-

299
00:12:58,289 --> 00:12:59,540
No, I do mind.

300
00:12:59,582 --> 00:13:01,042
The Dude minds.

301
00:13:01,083 --> 00:13:02,918
This will not stand,
you know.

302
00:13:02,960 --> 00:13:04,837
This aggression
will not stand, man.

303
00:13:04,879 --> 00:13:06,756
I mean, your wife owes-

304
00:13:06,797 --> 00:13:09,634
My wife is not
the issue here!

305
00:13:09,675 --> 00:13:11,552
I hope that
someday my wife

306
00:13:11,594 --> 00:13:13,554
will learn to live
on her allowance,

307
00:13:13,596 --> 00:13:15,431
which is ample,
but if she does not,

308
00:13:15,473 --> 00:13:17,350
that is her problem,
not mine,

309
00:13:17,391 --> 00:13:18,851
just as the rug
is your problem,

310
00:13:18,893 --> 00:13:21,228
just as every bum's
lot in life

311
00:13:21,270 --> 00:13:22,647
is his own
responsibility,

312
00:13:22,688 --> 00:13:25,024
regardless of who
he chooses to blame.

313
00:13:25,066 --> 00:13:28,819
I didn't blame anyone
for the loss of my legs.

314
00:13:28,861 --> 00:13:30,738
Some chinaman took them
from me in Korea.

315
00:13:30,780 --> 00:13:33,157
But I went out
and achieved anyway.

316
00:13:34,575 --> 00:13:36,744
I cannot solve
your problems, sir,

317
00:13:36,786 --> 00:13:38,496
only you can.

318
00:13:39,372 --> 00:13:42,249
Oh, fuck it.

319
00:13:42,291 --> 00:13:43,751
Yes, that's your answer.

320
00:13:43,793 --> 00:13:45,127
That's your answer
to everything.

321
00:13:45,169 --> 00:13:46,629
Tattoo it
on your forehead.

322
00:13:46,671 --> 00:13:49,423
Your revolution is
over, Mr. Lebowski!

323
00:13:49,465 --> 00:13:50,925
Condolences!

324
00:13:50,966 --> 00:13:52,343
The bums lost!

325
00:13:52,385 --> 00:13:55,638
My advice to you is to do
what your parents did!

326
00:13:55,680 --> 00:13:57,556
Get a job, sir!

327
00:13:57,598 --> 00:13:59,517
The bums will always lose!

328
00:13:59,558 --> 00:14:01,435
Do you hear me,
Lebowski?!

329
00:14:01,477 --> 00:14:04,355
The bums
will always lose!

330
00:14:04,397 --> 00:14:07,733
How was your meeting,
Mr. Lebowski?

331
00:14:07,775 --> 00:14:12,154
Ok. The old man told me to
take any rug in the house.

332
00:14:12,196 --> 00:14:13,656
Well, enjoy,

333
00:14:13,698 --> 00:14:16,033
and perhaps we'll see you
again sometime, Dude.

334
00:14:16,075 --> 00:14:18,452
Yeah, sure, if I'm
in the neighborhood,

335
00:14:18,494 --> 00:14:21,747
You know, and...

336
00:14:21,789 --> 00:14:25,084
I need to use the John.

337
00:14:33,759 --> 00:14:35,136
Blow on them.

338
00:14:36,178 --> 00:14:39,265
Go ahead, blow.

339
00:14:40,099 --> 00:14:43,436
You want me to blow
on your, toes?

340
00:14:45,396 --> 00:14:47,398
I can't blow that far.

341
00:14:52,862 --> 00:14:54,822
Are you sure
he won't mind?

342
00:14:54,864 --> 00:14:56,741
He really doesn't
care about anything.

343
00:14:56,782 --> 00:14:58,617
He's a nihilist.

344
00:14:58,659 --> 00:15:00,536
Oh, and that
must be exhausting.

345
00:15:00,578 --> 00:15:02,038
You're not blowing.

346
00:15:02,079 --> 00:15:04,957
Our guest has to be getting
along, Mrs. Lebowski.

347
00:15:04,999 --> 00:15:08,669
Oh, you're Bunny.

348
00:15:09,295 --> 00:15:11,756
I'll suck your cock
for $1,000.

349
00:15:15,468 --> 00:15:17,553
Wonderful woman.

350
00:15:17,595 --> 00:15:18,929
We're all-we're all
very fond of her.

351
00:15:18,971 --> 00:15:19,930
Very free-spirited.

352
00:15:19,972 --> 00:15:21,349
Brandt can't watch,
though,

353
00:15:21,390 --> 00:15:22,850
Or he has
to pay 100.

354
00:15:22,892 --> 00:15:25,561
That's marvelous.

355
00:15:27,188 --> 00:15:31,192
I'm just gonna
go find a cash machine.

356
00:15:35,363 --> 00:15:36,739
Slamming them
tonight.

357
00:15:36,781 --> 00:15:38,658
You guys are
dead in the water.

358
00:15:38,699 --> 00:15:41,952
All right!
Way to go, Donny!

359
00:15:41,994 --> 00:15:45,331
If you will it,
it is no dream.

360
00:15:45,373 --> 00:15:47,249
You're fucking
20 minutes late, man.

361
00:15:47,291 --> 00:15:48,626
What the fuck is that?

362
00:15:48,668 --> 00:15:49,627
Theodore Herzel.

363
00:15:50,670 --> 00:15:53,047
The state of Israel.
If you will it, Dude,

364
00:15:53,089 --> 00:15:53,923
It is no dream.

365
00:15:53,964 --> 00:15:55,424
What the fuck you
talking about, man?

366
00:15:55,466 --> 00:15:57,343
The carrier. What's
in the fucking carrier?

367
00:15:57,385 --> 00:15:58,719
Cynthia's dog.

368
00:15:58,761 --> 00:16:01,138
I think
it's a Pomeranian.

369
00:16:01,180 --> 00:16:02,640
I can't leave him
home alone

370
00:16:02,682 --> 00:16:03,557
or he eats
the furniture.

371
00:16:03,599 --> 00:16:05,017
I'm watching it

372
00:16:05,059 --> 00:16:05,935
while Cynthia
and Marty Ackerman

373
00:16:05,977 --> 00:16:06,852
are in Hawaii.

374
00:16:06,894 --> 00:16:08,354
You brought a fucking
Pomeranian bowling?

375
00:16:08,396 --> 00:16:09,730
What do you mean,
"brought it bowling"?

376
00:16:09,772 --> 00:16:11,148
I didn't rent it shoes,

377
00:16:11,190 --> 00:16:12,650
I'm not buying it
a fucking beer,

378
00:16:12,692 --> 00:16:14,527
he's not taking
your fucking turn, Dude.

379
00:16:14,568 --> 00:16:16,445
Man, if my
fucking ex-wife

380
00:16:16,487 --> 00:16:17,947
asked me to take care
of her fucking dog

381
00:16:17,989 --> 00:16:19,323
while she and her boyfriend
went to Honolulu,

382
00:16:19,365 --> 00:16:20,825
I'd tell her to
go fuck herself.

383
00:16:20,866 --> 00:16:22,243
Why can't she board it?

384
00:16:22,284 --> 00:16:24,245
First of all, Dude,
you don't have an ex.

385
00:16:24,286 --> 00:16:25,746
Secondly, this is
a fucking show dog

386
00:16:25,788 --> 00:16:27,123
with fucking papers.

387
00:16:27,164 --> 00:16:28,624
You can't board it.
It gets upset.

388
00:16:28,666 --> 00:16:29,542
Its hair falls out.

389
00:16:29,583 --> 00:16:30,543
Walter-

390
00:16:30,584 --> 00:16:31,919
The fucking dog
has fucking papers.

391
00:16:31,961 --> 00:16:33,754
Over the line!

392
00:16:34,797 --> 00:16:36,132
I'm sorry, Smokey,
you were over the line.

393
00:16:36,173 --> 00:16:37,133
That's a foul.

394
00:16:37,174 --> 00:16:38,634
Bullshit.
Mark it 8, Dude.

395
00:16:38,676 --> 00:16:41,429
Excuse me, mark it
zero. Next frame.

396
00:16:41,470 --> 00:16:44,348
Bullshit, Walter.
Mark it 8, Dude.

397
00:16:44,390 --> 00:16:46,350
Smokey, this is not
'nam, this is bowling.

398
00:16:46,392 --> 00:16:47,226
There are rules.

399
00:16:47,268 --> 00:16:49,020
Hey, Walter, come on,
it's just-

400
00:16:49,061 --> 00:16:50,021
Hey, man, it's Smokey.

401
00:16:50,062 --> 00:16:51,439
So his toe slipped
over a little.

402
00:16:51,480 --> 00:16:53,441
You know, it's
just a game, man.

403
00:16:53,482 --> 00:16:54,817
This is a league game.
This determines

404
00:16:54,859 --> 00:16:56,444
who enters
the next round-robin.

405
00:16:56,485 --> 00:16:57,320
Am I wrong?

406
00:16:57,361 --> 00:16:58,321
Yeah,
but I wasn't-

407
00:16:58,362 --> 00:16:59,238
Am I wrong?

408
00:16:59,280 --> 00:17:00,656
Yeah,
but I wasn't over.

409
00:17:00,698 --> 00:17:01,532
Give me
the marker, Dude.

410
00:17:01,574 --> 00:17:03,034
I'm marking an 8.

411
00:17:03,075 --> 00:17:04,952
Smokey, my friend,

412
00:17:04,994 --> 00:17:06,829
You're entering
a world of pain.

413
00:17:06,871 --> 00:17:07,830
Walter, man.

414
00:17:07,872 --> 00:17:09,623
You mark
that frame an 8,

415
00:17:09,665 --> 00:17:11,250
You're entering
a world of pain.

416
00:17:11,292 --> 00:17:12,626
I'm not-

417
00:17:12,668 --> 00:17:14,545
A world of pain.

418
00:17:14,587 --> 00:17:16,547
Look, Dude,
this is your partner.

419
00:17:16,589 --> 00:17:18,924
Has the whole world
gone crazy?!

420
00:17:18,966 --> 00:17:20,843
Am I the only one
around here

421
00:17:20,885 --> 00:17:21,719
who gives a shit
about the rules?!

422
00:17:21,761 --> 00:17:23,220
Mark it zero!

423
00:17:23,262 --> 00:17:24,639
They're calling
the cops, man.

424
00:17:24,680 --> 00:17:25,640
Put the piece away.

425
00:17:25,681 --> 00:17:26,641
Mark it zero!

426
00:17:26,682 --> 00:17:27,933
Walter, put
the piece away.

427
00:17:27,975 --> 00:17:28,934
Walter-

428
00:17:28,976 --> 00:17:30,353
You think I'm
fucking around here?

429
00:17:30,394 --> 00:17:32,063
Mark it zero!

430
00:17:38,069 --> 00:17:40,446
All right,
it's fucking zero.

431
00:17:40,488 --> 00:17:42,990
You happy,
you crazy fuck?

432
00:17:44,784 --> 00:17:46,786
It's a league game,
Smoke.

433
00:17:49,163 --> 00:17:50,539
You can't do that, man.

434
00:17:50,581 --> 00:17:52,041
These guys, you know,
they're like me.

435
00:17:52,083 --> 00:17:53,542
They're pacifists.

436
00:17:53,584 --> 00:17:55,336
Smokey was a
conscientious objector.

437
00:17:55,378 --> 00:17:56,837
You know, Dude,
I, myself,

438
00:17:56,879 --> 00:17:58,756
dabbled in pacifism
at one point,

439
00:17:58,798 --> 00:17:59,632
not in 'nam,
of course.

440
00:17:59,674 --> 00:18:03,052
And you know he's got
emotional problems, man.

441
00:18:03,094 --> 00:18:04,929
You mean,
beyond pacifism?

442
00:18:04,971 --> 00:18:07,723
He's fragile,
Very fragile.

443
00:18:07,765 --> 00:18:12,019
I did not know that.

444
00:18:12,061 --> 00:18:13,938
Well,

445
00:18:13,980 --> 00:18:15,439
it's all water
under the bridge,

446
00:18:15,481 --> 00:18:17,817
and we do enter
the next round-robin.

447
00:18:17,858 --> 00:18:18,818
Am I wrong?

448
00:18:18,859 --> 00:18:20,236
No, you're not wrong.

449
00:18:20,277 --> 00:18:21,153
Am I wrong?

450
00:18:21,195 --> 00:18:22,154
You're not wrong,
Walter,

451
00:18:22,196 --> 00:18:23,531
you're just an asshole!

452
00:18:23,572 --> 00:18:24,949
Ok, then.

453
00:18:24,991 --> 00:18:26,450
We play Quintana
and O'Brien next week.

454
00:18:26,492 --> 00:18:28,369
They should be pushovers.

455
00:18:29,787 --> 00:18:31,747
Man, will you just-

456
00:18:31,789 --> 00:18:33,124
Just take it easy,
man.

457
00:18:33,165 --> 00:18:36,043
You know, that's your
answer for everything, Dude.

458
00:18:36,085 --> 00:18:37,336
And let me
point out something.

459
00:18:37,378 --> 00:18:39,922
Pacifism is not-look
at our current situation

460
00:18:39,964 --> 00:18:41,841
with that
camelfucker in Iraq.

461
00:18:41,882 --> 00:18:43,718
Pacifism is not something
to hide behind.

462
00:18:43,759 --> 00:18:46,637
Just take it easy, man.

463
00:18:46,679 --> 00:18:47,930
I'm perfectly calm, Dude.

464
00:18:47,972 --> 00:18:50,349
Yeah, waving
the fucking gun around?

465
00:18:50,391 --> 00:18:51,851
Calmer than you are.

466
00:18:51,892 --> 00:18:53,728
Will you
just take it easy?

467
00:18:53,769 --> 00:18:56,272
Calmer than you are.

468
00:19:00,067 --> 00:19:01,944
Dude, this is Smokey.

469
00:19:01,986 --> 00:19:03,321
Look, I don't want to
be a hard-on about this,

470
00:19:03,362 --> 00:19:04,822
and I know it
wasn't your fault,

471
00:19:04,864 --> 00:19:07,241
but I just thought
it was fair to tell you

472
00:19:07,283 --> 00:19:09,118
that Gilbert and I will be
submitting this to the league

473
00:19:09,160 --> 00:19:11,037
and asking them to
set aside the round,

474
00:19:11,078 --> 00:19:13,456
I don't know,
maybe forfeit it to us.

475
00:19:13,497 --> 00:19:16,751
So, like I say, just thought,
you know, fair warning.

476
00:19:16,792 --> 00:19:18,794
Tell Walter. I'm sorry.

477
00:19:20,171 --> 00:19:24,425
Mr. Lebowski, this
is Brandt at,

478
00:19:24,467 --> 00:19:26,927
well, at
Mr. Lebowski's office.

479
00:19:26,969 --> 00:19:29,889
Please call us as
soon as it's convenient.

480
00:19:31,766 --> 00:19:33,142
Mr. Lebowski,
this is Bill Selliger

481
00:19:33,184 --> 00:19:34,727
of the Southern Cal
Bowling League,

482
00:19:34,769 --> 00:19:36,646
and I just got
an informal report

483
00:19:36,687 --> 00:19:40,024
that a member of your team,
a Walter Sobchak,

484
00:19:40,066 --> 00:19:42,485
drew a firearm
during league play.

485
00:19:43,277 --> 00:19:44,737
If this is true,
of course,

486
00:19:44,779 --> 00:19:46,155
it contravenes a number
of the league's bylaws

487
00:19:46,197 --> 00:19:47,657
and also article 27
of the league-

488
00:19:49,575 --> 00:19:50,951
Hey, Monty.

489
00:19:50,993 --> 00:19:53,329
Dude, I finally got-
I got the,

490
00:19:53,371 --> 00:19:55,331
the venue I wanted.

491
00:19:55,373 --> 00:19:57,249
I'm performing
my dance quintet,

492
00:19:57,291 --> 00:19:58,626
you know, my cycle,

493
00:19:58,668 --> 00:20:00,628
at Crane Jackson's
fountain street theater

494
00:20:00,670 --> 00:20:02,046
on Tuesday night,

495
00:20:02,088 --> 00:20:03,923
and, well, I'd
love it if you came

496
00:20:03,964 --> 00:20:05,925
and gave me notes.

497
00:20:05,966 --> 00:20:07,843
I'll be there, man.

498
00:20:11,097 --> 00:20:13,432
tomorrow's
already the 10th.

499
00:20:13,474 --> 00:20:15,893
Far out.

500
00:20:17,895 --> 00:20:19,730
All right, ok.

501
00:20:19,772 --> 00:20:23,275
Just slip
the rent under my door.

502
00:20:26,070 --> 00:20:27,238
... serious infraction

503
00:20:27,279 --> 00:20:30,282
and examine your standing.
Thank you.

504
00:20:31,659 --> 00:20:33,619
Mr. Lebowski,
Brandt again.

505
00:20:33,661 --> 00:20:36,330
Please do call us as
soon as you get in,

506
00:20:36,372 --> 00:20:37,832
and I'll
send a limo.

507
00:20:37,873 --> 00:20:39,250
I hope you're not
avoiding this call

508
00:20:39,291 --> 00:20:40,751
because of the rug

509
00:20:40,793 --> 00:20:43,629
Which, I assure you,
is not a problem.

510
00:20:43,671 --> 00:20:46,048
We need your help,
and...

511
00:20:46,090 --> 00:20:48,426
Well, we'd very much
like to see you.

512
00:20:48,467 --> 00:20:50,886
Thank you.
it's Brandt.

513
00:20:51,762 --> 00:20:53,723
We've had some
terrible news.

514
00:20:53,764 --> 00:20:56,183
Mr. Lebowski's in seclusion
in the west wing.

515
00:20:59,478 --> 00:21:01,397
Mr. Lebowski.

516
00:21:07,570 --> 00:21:08,988
Funny...

517
00:21:09,989 --> 00:21:13,826
I can look back
on a life of achievement,

518
00:21:13,868 --> 00:21:15,244
challenges met,

519
00:21:15,286 --> 00:21:17,621
competitors bested,

520
00:21:17,663 --> 00:21:20,166
obstacles overcome.

521
00:21:21,584 --> 00:21:24,337
I've accomplished more
than most men

522
00:21:24,378 --> 00:21:27,381
and without the use
of my legs.

523
00:21:30,092 --> 00:21:34,347
What makes a man,
Mr. Lebowski?

524
00:21:34,388 --> 00:21:35,348
Dude.

525
00:21:38,267 --> 00:21:40,645
I don't know, sir.

526
00:21:40,686 --> 00:21:44,690
Is it being prepared
to do the right thing?

527
00:21:45,983 --> 00:21:47,818
Whatever the cost?

528
00:21:47,860 --> 00:21:50,237
Isn't that what
makes a man?

529
00:21:50,279 --> 00:21:53,741
Sure, that and a pair of testicles.

530
00:21:53,783 --> 00:21:55,117
You're joking.

531
00:21:55,159 --> 00:21:56,577
But...

532
00:21:57,995 --> 00:21:59,830
Perhaps you're right.

533
00:21:59,872 --> 00:22:02,750
You mind
if I do a "j"?

534
00:22:02,792 --> 00:22:05,169
Bunny...

535
00:22:06,671 --> 00:22:08,047
Excuse me?

536
00:22:08,089 --> 00:22:10,925
Bunny Lebowski,

537
00:22:10,966 --> 00:22:13,844
She is the light
of my life.

538
00:22:13,886 --> 00:22:17,473
Are you surprised
at my tears, sir?

539
00:22:18,683 --> 00:22:20,017
Fuckin' a.

540
00:22:20,059 --> 00:22:28,359
Strong men also cry.

541
00:22:30,569 --> 00:22:33,489
I received this fax
this morning.

542
00:22:35,366 --> 00:22:37,326
As you can see,

543
00:22:37,368 --> 00:22:39,745
it is a ransom note.

544
00:22:39,787 --> 00:22:42,123
"We have Bunnie. "

545
00:22:42,164 --> 00:22:44,542
Written by men who
are unable to achieve

546
00:22:44,583 --> 00:22:46,919
on a level field
of play.

547
00:22:46,961 --> 00:22:48,337
"Gather one million dollars

548
00:22:48,379 --> 00:22:52,049
in unmarked,
non-consecutive twenties. "

549
00:22:52,091 --> 00:22:53,050
Weaklings.

550
00:22:53,092 --> 00:22:54,218
"Await instructions. "

551
00:22:54,260 --> 00:22:55,052
Bums!

552
00:22:55,094 --> 00:22:55,928
"No funny stuff. "

553
00:22:55,970 --> 00:22:58,848
Bummer.

554
00:23:00,266 --> 00:23:02,226
This is a bummer,
man.

555
00:23:02,268 --> 00:23:04,228
That's a bummer.

556
00:23:04,270 --> 00:23:08,774
Brandt will fill you in
on the details.

557
00:23:21,370 --> 00:23:23,247
Mr. Lebowski
is prepared to make

558
00:23:23,289 --> 00:23:26,125
a generous offer to you
to act as courier

559
00:23:26,167 --> 00:23:28,044
once we get instructions
for the money.

560
00:23:28,085 --> 00:23:29,545
Why me, man?

561
00:23:29,587 --> 00:23:32,423
He believes the culprits
might be the very people

562
00:23:32,465 --> 00:23:35,343
who soiled your rug,

563
00:23:35,384 --> 00:23:36,719
and you're in
a unique position

564
00:23:36,761 --> 00:23:38,638
to confirm
or disconfirm

565
00:23:38,679 --> 00:23:40,139
that suspicion.

566
00:23:40,181 --> 00:23:42,058
He thinks the
carpet pissers did this?

567
00:23:42,099 --> 00:23:44,560
Well, Dude,
we just don't know.

568
00:25:17,069 --> 00:25:19,530
Fucking Quintana.

569
00:25:19,572 --> 00:25:22,325
That creep
can roll, man.

570
00:25:22,366 --> 00:25:23,826
Yeah, but he's
a pervert, Dude.

571
00:25:25,286 --> 00:25:29,123
No. He's a sex offender
with a record.

572
00:25:29,165 --> 00:25:30,041
He did 6 months at chino

573
00:25:30,082 --> 00:25:31,917
for exposing himself
to an 8-year-old.

574
00:25:31,959 --> 00:25:33,919
When he
moved to Hollywood,

575
00:25:33,961 --> 00:25:34,837
hHe had to go
door-to-door

576
00:25:34,879 --> 00:25:36,839
to tell everyone
he was a pederast.

577
00:25:36,881 --> 00:25:39,258
What's
a pederast, Walter?

578
00:25:39,300 --> 00:25:41,093
Shut the fuck up,
Donny.

579
00:25:43,971 --> 00:25:45,431
How much
they give you?

580
00:25:45,473 --> 00:25:47,350
20 grand, man.

581
00:25:47,391 --> 00:25:49,352
And, of course, I still
get to keep the rug.

582
00:25:49,393 --> 00:25:50,227
Just for making
the hand-off?

583
00:25:50,269 --> 00:25:53,648
Yeah. They gave
Dude a beeper.

584
00:25:53,689 --> 00:25:55,524
Now, so whenever
these guys call-

585
00:25:55,566 --> 00:25:56,525
What if it's
during a game?

586
00:25:56,567 --> 00:25:58,819
Oh, I told them if it
was during league play...

587
00:25:58,861 --> 00:26:00,237
What's during
league play?

588
00:26:00,279 --> 00:26:01,739
Life does not
stop and start

589
00:26:01,781 --> 00:26:02,657
at your convenience,

590
00:26:02,698 --> 00:26:04,617
you miserable
piece of shit.

591
00:26:04,659 --> 00:26:05,534
I figure...

592
00:26:05,576 --> 00:26:06,535
What's wrong
with Walter, Dude?

593
00:26:06,577 --> 00:26:07,953
I figure
it's easy money.

594
00:26:07,995 --> 00:26:08,954
It's all
pretty harmless.

595
00:26:08,996 --> 00:26:10,331
She probably
kidnapped herself.

596
00:26:11,374 --> 00:26:12,333
What do you mean, Dude?

597
00:26:12,375 --> 00:26:14,251
Rug pee-ers
did not do this.

598
00:26:14,293 --> 00:26:15,628
Look at it.

599
00:26:15,670 --> 00:26:17,129
A young trophy wife

600
00:26:17,171 --> 00:26:19,048
marries this guy
for his money.

601
00:26:19,090 --> 00:26:21,425
She figures he isn't
giving her enough.

602
00:26:21,467 --> 00:26:22,843
You know, she owes money
all over town.

603
00:26:22,885 --> 00:26:25,638
That fuckin'...
Bitch.

604
00:26:25,680 --> 00:26:27,556
It's all goddamn
fake, man.

605
00:26:27,598 --> 00:26:29,058
It's like Lenin said.

606
00:26:29,100 --> 00:26:31,936
You look for the person
who will benefit,

607
00:26:31,978 --> 00:26:34,355
and you know...

608
00:26:34,397 --> 00:26:35,231
I am the walrus?

609
00:26:35,272 --> 00:26:37,233
You know you'll...

610
00:26:37,274 --> 00:26:38,651
You know what
I'm trying to say.

611
00:26:38,693 --> 00:26:39,652
I am the walrus.

612
00:26:39,694 --> 00:26:41,529
That fuckin' bitch!

613
00:26:42,571 --> 00:26:43,447
I am the walrus.

614
00:26:43,489 --> 00:26:45,324
Shut the fuck up,
Donny!

615
00:26:45,366 --> 00:26:48,744
V.I. Lenin. Vladimir
Ilyich Ulyanov!

616
00:26:48,786 --> 00:26:49,745
What the fuck
is he talking about?

617
00:26:49,787 --> 00:26:51,038
Fucking exactly
what happened.

618
00:26:51,080 --> 00:26:52,957
That makes me
fucking sick.

619
00:26:52,999 --> 00:26:53,958
What do you care,
Walter?

620
00:26:54,000 --> 00:26:55,918
Those rich fucks.

621
00:26:55,960 --> 00:26:57,837
This whole
fuckin' thing.

622
00:26:57,878 --> 00:26:59,839
I did not watch
my buddies die

623
00:26:59,880 --> 00:27:00,756
facedown in the mud

624
00:27:00,798 --> 00:27:02,258
so that this
fucking strumpet,

625
00:27:02,299 --> 00:27:03,634
This fucking whore-

626
00:27:03,676 --> 00:27:06,053
I don't see any connection
to Vietnam, man.

627
00:27:06,095 --> 00:27:07,054
Well, there's
a literal connection.

628
00:27:07,096 --> 00:27:08,931
No, Walter, face it,
there isn't any connection.

629
00:27:08,973 --> 00:27:10,433
Your roll.

630
00:27:10,474 --> 00:27:11,851
Have it your way,
but my point is-

631
00:27:11,892 --> 00:27:12,852
Your roll.

632
00:27:12,893 --> 00:27:13,728
Your roll.
My point is-

633
00:27:13,769 --> 00:27:15,521
Are you ready
to be fucked, man?

634
00:27:15,563 --> 00:27:20,443
I see you roll your way
into the semis.

635
00:27:20,484 --> 00:27:21,819
Dios mio, man.

636
00:27:21,861 --> 00:27:25,239
Liam and me, we're
gonna fuck you up.

637
00:27:25,281 --> 00:27:26,657
Yeah?

638
00:27:26,699 --> 00:27:29,035
Well... you know,
that's just like...

639
00:27:29,076 --> 00:27:31,829
Your opinion, man.

640
00:27:31,871 --> 00:27:35,333
Let me tell you
something, pendejo,

641
00:27:35,374 --> 00:27:38,252
you pull any
crazy shit with us,

642
00:27:38,294 --> 00:27:40,629
you flash a piece out
on the lanes,

643
00:27:40,671 --> 00:27:43,049
I'll take it away from you
and stick it up your ass

644
00:27:43,090 --> 00:27:44,842
and pull
The fuckin' trigger

645
00:27:44,884 --> 00:27:47,094
till it goes click.

646
00:27:48,262 --> 00:27:49,138
Jesus.

647
00:27:49,180 --> 00:27:50,640
You said it, man.

648
00:27:50,681 --> 00:27:55,061
Nobody fucks
with the Jesus.

649
00:27:59,398 --> 00:28:01,567
8- year-olds, Dude.

650
00:28:45,695 --> 00:28:48,197
# The man in me will do #

651
00:28:49,073 --> 00:28:51,826
# Nearly any task #

652
00:28:51,867 --> 00:28:54,745
# And as for compensation #

653
00:28:54,787 --> 00:28:57,123
# There's little
he will ask #

654
00:28:58,666 --> 00:29:01,836
# Take a woman
like you #

655
00:29:01,877 --> 00:29:03,921
# To get through #

656
00:29:03,963 --> 00:29:05,881
# To the man in me #

657
00:29:08,676 --> 00:29:11,929
# The storm clouds
are raging #

658
00:29:11,971 --> 00:29:15,349
# All around my door #

659
00:29:15,391 --> 00:29:17,226
# I think to myself #

660
00:29:17,268 --> 00:29:21,522
# I might not take it
anymore #

661
00:29:21,564 --> 00:29:24,525
# Take a woman
like your kind #

662
00:29:24,567 --> 00:29:26,319
# To find #

663
00:29:26,360 --> 00:29:29,196
# The man in me #

664
00:29:31,282 --> 00:29:33,534
# But #

665
00:29:33,576 --> 00:29:36,495
# What a wonderful feeling #

666
00:29:38,372 --> 00:29:43,377
# Just to know
that you are near... #

667
00:30:00,478 --> 00:30:01,854
They called about
80 minutes ago.

668
00:30:01,896 --> 00:30:02,730
They want you
to take the money,

669
00:30:02,772 --> 00:30:04,732
drive north on the 405.
They will call you

670
00:30:04,774 --> 00:30:06,651
on the portable phone
with instructions

671
00:30:06,692 --> 00:30:07,526
in about 40 minutes.

672
00:30:07,568 --> 00:30:09,528
One person only. They
were very clear on that,

673
00:30:09,570 --> 00:30:11,447
Or I'd go with you.
One person only.

674
00:30:11,489 --> 00:30:12,448
What happened to your jaw?

675
00:30:12,490 --> 00:30:14,492
Oh, nothin',
you know.

676
00:30:15,284 --> 00:30:17,286
Here's the money.

677
00:30:18,162 --> 00:30:19,622
And the phone.

678
00:30:19,664 --> 00:30:22,541
Please, Dude, follow whatever
instructions they give.

679
00:30:22,583 --> 00:30:23,542
All right.

680
00:30:23,584 --> 00:30:25,836
Her life is in your hands.

681
00:30:25,878 --> 00:30:26,837
Oh, man,
don't say that.

682
00:30:26,879 --> 00:30:28,756
Mr. Lebowski asked me
to repeat that.

683
00:30:28,798 --> 00:30:29,757
Her life is in your hands.

684
00:30:29,799 --> 00:30:30,633
Oh, shit, man.

685
00:30:30,675 --> 00:30:33,052
Her life is in
your hands, Dude.

686
00:30:33,094 --> 00:30:35,471
Report back to us
as soon as it's done.

687
00:30:44,689 --> 00:30:46,023
Where the fuck
are you goin', man?

688
00:30:46,065 --> 00:30:47,525
Take the ringer.
I'll drive.

689
00:30:47,566 --> 00:30:49,443
What? The what?

690
00:30:49,485 --> 00:30:50,820
The ringer.

691
00:30:50,861 --> 00:30:52,780
The ringer,
Dude.

692
00:30:59,996 --> 00:31:02,331
Have they
Called yet? What the-

693
00:31:02,373 --> 00:31:03,749
What the hell is this?

694
00:31:03,791 --> 00:31:05,251
My dirty undies,
Dude.

695
00:31:05,292 --> 00:31:06,627
Laundry.
The whites.

696
00:31:06,669 --> 00:31:09,046
Walter, I'm sure
there's a reason

697
00:31:09,088 --> 00:31:10,548
you brought
your dirty undies, man.

698
00:31:10,589 --> 00:31:11,924
That's right, Dude.
The weight.

699
00:31:11,966 --> 00:31:13,843
The ringer
cannot look empty.

700
00:31:13,884 --> 00:31:15,720
Walter, what the fuck
are you thinking, man?

701
00:31:15,761 --> 00:31:17,722
You're right, Dude.
I got to thinking.

702
00:31:17,763 --> 00:31:19,056
I got to thinking
why should we settle

703
00:31:19,098 --> 00:31:20,558
for a measly fuckin'
20 grand-

704
00:31:20,599 --> 00:31:21,934
We? What the fuck we?

705
00:31:21,976 --> 00:31:23,352
You said you just wanted
to come along.

706
00:31:23,394 --> 00:31:24,353
My point, Dude, is

707
00:31:24,395 --> 00:31:25,730
why should we
settle for 20 grand

708
00:31:25,771 --> 00:31:27,732
when we can keep
the entire million?

709
00:31:27,773 --> 00:31:29,650
Am I wrong?
Yes, you're wrong.

710
00:31:29,692 --> 00:31:31,027
This isn't
a fuckin' game, man.

711
00:31:31,068 --> 00:31:33,446
Oh, but it is a game.
You said so yourself.

712
00:31:33,487 --> 00:31:35,031
She kidnapped herself.

713
00:31:35,072 --> 00:31:35,990
I said I thought-

714
00:31:41,787 --> 00:31:43,247
Dude here.

715
00:31:43,289 --> 00:31:45,124
Who is this?

716
00:31:45,166 --> 00:31:47,918
Dude the bagman, man.
Where do you want us to go?

717
00:31:47,960 --> 00:31:49,378
Us?

718
00:31:53,466 --> 00:31:56,052
Yeah, you know,
me and the driver.

719
00:31:56,093 --> 00:31:58,554
I'm not handling the money,
driving the car,

720
00:31:58,596 --> 00:31:59,930
and talking on the phone
all by my-

721
00:31:59,972 --> 00:32:01,223
Shut the fuck up!

722
00:32:01,265 --> 00:32:02,725
Dude, are you
fuckin' this up?

723
00:32:02,767 --> 00:32:04,268
Who is that?

724
00:32:05,186 --> 00:32:07,021
That is the driver.

725
00:32:07,063 --> 00:32:09,440
I told you-

726
00:32:10,483 --> 00:32:11,442
What the fuck's
goin' on?

727
00:32:11,484 --> 00:32:13,319
Walter! What the fuck
is goin' on?

728
00:32:13,361 --> 00:32:14,236
He hung up, man!

729
00:32:14,278 --> 00:32:17,156
You fucked it up!

730
00:32:17,198 --> 00:32:18,658
Her life was
in our hands, man.

731
00:32:18,699 --> 00:32:19,533
Easy, Dude.

732
00:32:19,575 --> 00:32:21,452
We're screwed now.
We don't get shit.

733
00:32:21,494 --> 00:32:23,454
They're gonna kill her.

734
00:32:23,496 --> 00:32:24,330
We're fucked, Walter.

735
00:32:24,372 --> 00:32:26,040
Nothing is fucked,
Dude.

736
00:32:26,082 --> 00:32:28,417
Come on, you're
being very un-Dude.

737
00:32:28,459 --> 00:32:29,835
They'll call back.

738
00:32:29,877 --> 00:32:31,379
Look,
she kidnapped-

739
00:32:32,296 --> 00:32:34,131
You see? Nothing's
fucked here, Dude.

740
00:32:34,173 --> 00:32:35,633
Nothing is fucked.

741
00:32:35,675 --> 00:32:37,551
They're a bunch of
fuckin' amateurs!

742
00:32:37,593 --> 00:32:40,346
Hey, Walter, will you
just shut the fuck up?

743
00:32:40,388 --> 00:32:42,723
Don't say peep while I'm
doin' business here, man.

744
00:32:42,765 --> 00:32:44,684
Ok, Dude,
have it your way.

745
00:32:46,686 --> 00:32:48,020
But they're amateurs.

746
00:32:51,899 --> 00:32:52,817
Ok, we proceed.

747
00:32:52,858 --> 00:32:54,735
But only if there's
no funny stuff.

748
00:32:54,777 --> 00:32:56,237
Yeah, yeah.

749
00:32:56,278 --> 00:32:57,655
So no funny stuff, ok?

750
00:32:57,697 --> 00:33:01,158
Just tell me where the fuck
you want us to go.

751
00:33:04,662 --> 00:33:05,955
That was the sign, man.

752
00:33:05,997 --> 00:33:09,959
So all we gotta do
is get her back,

753
00:33:10,167 --> 00:33:12,044
No one's in a position
to complain,

754
00:33:12,086 --> 00:33:14,046
And we keep
the baksheesh.

755
00:33:14,088 --> 00:33:14,922
Yeah, terrific, Walter,

756
00:33:14,964 --> 00:33:16,924
but you haven't told me how
we're gonna get her back.

757
00:33:16,966 --> 00:33:17,842
Where is she?

758
00:33:17,883 --> 00:33:19,343
That's the simple part,
Dude.

759
00:33:19,385 --> 00:33:20,720
We make the hand-off,

760
00:33:20,761 --> 00:33:23,139
I grab one of 'em,
beat it out of him.

761
00:33:24,682 --> 00:33:26,058
Yeah. That's
a great plan.

762
00:33:26,100 --> 00:33:28,519
Walter, that's
fucking ingenious,

763
00:33:28,561 --> 00:33:29,854
If I understand it
correctly.

764
00:33:29,895 --> 00:33:31,355
It's a Swiss
fuckin' watch.

765
00:33:31,397 --> 00:33:32,231
That's right, Dude.

766
00:33:32,273 --> 00:33:34,150
The beauty of this
is its simplicity.

767
00:33:34,191 --> 00:33:36,027
Once a plan
gets too complex,

768
00:33:36,068 --> 00:33:37,445
everything
can go wrong.

769
00:33:37,486 --> 00:33:39,488
If there's one thing I
learned in 'nam, it's-

770
00:33:44,285 --> 00:33:46,120
You're coming
to a wooden bridge.

771
00:33:46,162 --> 00:33:47,538
When you cross
the bridge,

772
00:33:47,580 --> 00:33:48,539
you throw the bag

773
00:33:48,581 --> 00:33:50,458
from the left window
of the moving car.

774
00:33:50,499 --> 00:33:51,959
You're being watched.

775
00:33:53,878 --> 00:33:55,254
What'd he say?
Where's the hand-off?

776
00:33:55,296 --> 00:33:56,756
There is no fuckin'
hand-off, man.

777
00:33:56,797 --> 00:33:58,632
At the wooden bridge, we throw
the money out of the car.

778
00:33:59,759 --> 00:34:01,552
We throw the money
out of the moving car.

779
00:34:01,594 --> 00:34:03,929
No, we can't
do that, Dude.

780
00:34:03,971 --> 00:34:05,723
That fucks up
our plan.

781
00:34:05,765 --> 00:34:07,725
Well, call 'em up and
explain it to them, Walter.

782
00:34:07,767 --> 00:34:09,226
Your plan
is so fuckin' simple

783
00:34:09,268 --> 00:34:10,645
I'm sure they'll
fuckin' understand it.

784
00:34:10,686 --> 00:34:12,146
That's the beauty of it.

785
00:34:12,188 --> 00:34:13,022
Wooden bridge?

786
00:34:13,064 --> 00:34:14,023
I'm throwin' the money,
Walter.

787
00:34:14,065 --> 00:34:15,441
We're not fuckin'
around, man.

788
00:34:15,483 --> 00:34:16,942
Ok, Dude,
bridge is comin' up.

789
00:34:16,984 --> 00:34:17,818
Give me the ringer,
chop-chop.

790
00:34:17,860 --> 00:34:19,320
Fuck that, Walter.
I love ya,

791
00:34:19,362 --> 00:34:21,739
but sooner or later you're
gonna have to face the fact

792
00:34:21,781 --> 00:34:22,740
you're a goddamn moron.

793
00:34:22,782 --> 00:34:24,158
Ok, Dude.
No time to argue.

794
00:34:24,200 --> 00:34:25,117
Hey, man.
The bridge.

795
00:34:25,159 --> 00:34:26,035
Hey, Walter!

796
00:34:27,578 --> 00:34:29,372
There goes the ringer!

797
00:34:30,790 --> 00:34:31,749
What the fuck?!

798
00:34:31,791 --> 00:34:33,125
Here, Dude, your wheel.

799
00:34:33,167 --> 00:34:35,419
At 15 mph, I roll out.

800
00:34:35,461 --> 00:34:37,046
I double back, grab one,
and beat it out of him.

801
00:34:37,088 --> 00:34:38,422
The Uzi.
Uzi?!

802
00:34:38,464 --> 00:34:40,341
You didn't think I was
rolling out of here naked?

803
00:34:40,383 --> 00:34:41,342
Walter, please-

804
00:34:41,384 --> 00:34:43,260
15, Dude. This is it.
Let's take that hill!

805
00:35:02,989 --> 00:35:11,038
We have it!

806
00:35:26,971 --> 00:35:28,723
Fuck it, Dude.

807
00:35:28,764 --> 00:35:30,266
Let's go bowling.

808
00:36:07,762 --> 00:36:08,721
Etz chaim he, Dude,

809
00:36:08,763 --> 00:36:10,640
as the ex used to say.

810
00:36:10,681 --> 00:36:12,558
What the fuck is that
supposed to mean?

811
00:36:12,600 --> 00:36:14,352
What the fuck are we
gonna tell Lebowski?

812
00:36:18,773 --> 00:36:20,650
Well what exactly
is the problem?

813
00:36:20,691 --> 00:36:22,693
The problem is-

814
00:36:23,569 --> 00:36:24,570
What do you mean,
What's the-

815
00:36:25,488 --> 00:36:26,822
There was no...

816
00:36:26,864 --> 00:36:29,367
We didn't...

817
00:36:30,284 --> 00:36:32,620
They're gonna kill
that poor woman, man.

818
00:36:32,662 --> 00:36:34,038
What the fuck are you
talking about?

819
00:36:34,080 --> 00:36:35,039
The poor woman-

820
00:36:35,081 --> 00:36:36,040
that poor slut

821
00:36:36,082 --> 00:36:36,957
kidnapped herself.

822
00:36:36,999 --> 00:36:38,542
Come on, Dude,
you said so yourself.

823
00:36:38,584 --> 00:36:40,419
Man, I said I thought
she kidnapped herself.

824
00:36:40,461 --> 00:36:41,754
You're the one who's
so fuckin' certain.

825
00:36:41,796 --> 00:36:43,255
That's right, Dude.

826
00:36:43,297 --> 00:36:44,757
100% certain.

827
00:36:44,799 --> 00:36:46,217
They posted the next round
for the tournament.

828
00:36:46,258 --> 00:36:48,636
Donny, shut the fuck-
when do we play?

829
00:36:48,678 --> 00:36:49,428
This Saturday.
Quintana and-

830
00:36:49,470 --> 00:36:51,430
Saturday? Well, they
have to reschedule.

831
00:36:51,472 --> 00:36:53,849
Walter, what am I
gonna tell Lebowski?

832
00:36:53,891 --> 00:36:56,227
I told that fuck down
at the league office-

833
00:36:56,268 --> 00:36:57,645
Who's in charge Walter-
of scheduling?

834
00:36:57,687 --> 00:36:58,646
Burkhalter.

835
00:36:58,688 --> 00:37:00,523
I told that kraut
a fuckin' thousand times

836
00:37:00,564 --> 00:37:01,649
I don't roll
on Shabbos.

837
00:37:01,691 --> 00:37:03,025
He already Walter-
posted it.

838
00:37:03,067 --> 00:37:04,527
Well, he can fuckin'
unpost it!

839
00:37:04,568 --> 00:37:05,945
Who gives a shit?!

840
00:37:05,987 --> 00:37:07,738
They're gonna kill
that poor woman, man.

841
00:37:07,780 --> 00:37:09,240
What am I gonna tell
Lebowski?

842
00:37:09,281 --> 00:37:10,157
Come on, Dude,

843
00:37:10,199 --> 00:37:11,617
eventually she'll get tired
of her little game

844
00:37:11,659 --> 00:37:13,035
and, you know,
wander on back.

845
00:37:13,077 --> 00:37:14,537
How come you don't roll
on Saturday, Walter?

846
00:37:14,578 --> 00:37:15,454
I'm Shomer Shabbos.

847
00:37:15,496 --> 00:37:16,455
What's that, Walter?

848
00:37:16,497 --> 00:37:17,331
Yeah,
and in the meantime,

849
00:37:17,373 --> 00:37:18,833
What do I tell
Lebowski?

850
00:37:18,874 --> 00:37:20,251
Saturday, Donny,
is Shabbos,

851
00:37:20,292 --> 00:37:22,128
The jewish day of rest.
That means I don't work,

852
00:37:22,169 --> 00:37:25,047
I don't drive a car,
I don't fuckin' ride in a car,

853
00:37:25,089 --> 00:37:27,049
I don't handle money,
I don't turn on the oven,

854
00:37:27,091 --> 00:37:29,427
and I sure as shit
don't fucking roll!

855
00:37:29,468 --> 00:37:30,845
Sheesh.

856
00:37:30,886 --> 00:37:32,763
Shomer Shabbos!

857
00:37:34,265 --> 00:37:35,558
Walter,
How am I gonna-

858
00:37:35,599 --> 00:37:37,018
Shomer fucking Shabbos.

859
00:37:37,059 --> 00:37:38,936
Oh, fuck! That's it!
I'm outta here.

860
00:37:38,978 --> 00:37:40,479
Oh, come on, Dude.

861
00:37:42,773 --> 00:37:44,233
Dude! Dude!

862
00:37:44,275 --> 00:37:47,153
Look, you just tell him-

863
00:37:47,194 --> 00:37:48,529
Tell him we made the drop,

864
00:37:48,571 --> 00:37:49,947
and everything went,
you know...

865
00:37:49,989 --> 00:37:51,032
Oh, yeah,
how'd it go?

866
00:37:51,073 --> 00:37:52,825
Went all right. Dude's car
got a little dinged up.

867
00:37:52,867 --> 00:37:55,244
Walter, we didn't make
the fuckin' hand-off, man.

868
00:37:55,286 --> 00:37:57,246
They didn't get
the fuckin' money!

869
00:37:57,288 --> 00:37:58,622
And they're gonna-
they're gonna-

870
00:37:58,664 --> 00:38:00,124
They're gonna kill
that poor woman.

871
00:38:02,877 --> 00:38:04,337
Hey, Walter, if you
can't ride in a car,

872
00:38:04,378 --> 00:38:05,755
how do you get around
on shammos?

873
00:38:05,796 --> 00:38:07,256
Really, Dude,
you surprise me.

874
00:38:07,298 --> 00:38:10,134
They're not gonna kill shit,
they're not gonna do shit.

875
00:38:10,176 --> 00:38:11,052
What can they do to her?

876
00:38:11,093 --> 00:38:12,053
They're a bunch
of fuckin' amateurs,

877
00:38:12,094 --> 00:38:13,429
And meanwhile,
look at the bottom line.

878
00:38:13,471 --> 00:38:15,431
Who's sittin' on
a million fucking dollars?

879
00:38:15,473 --> 00:38:16,932
Am I wrong? Walter-

880
00:38:16,974 --> 00:38:18,851
Who's got a fuckin' million
fuckin' dollars

881
00:38:18,893 --> 00:38:20,227
sitting in the trunk
of our car?

882
00:38:20,269 --> 00:38:21,228
Our car, Walter?

883
00:38:21,270 --> 00:38:23,147
And what do they got?
My dirty undies.

884
00:38:23,189 --> 00:38:25,066
My fuckin' whites.

885
00:38:30,363 --> 00:38:32,239
Say, Dude.

886
00:38:32,281 --> 00:38:33,699
Where is your car?

887
00:38:34,659 --> 00:38:36,035
Who's got your
undies, Walter?

888
00:38:36,077 --> 00:38:37,036
Where's your car, Dude?

889
00:38:37,078 --> 00:38:39,497
You don't know,
Walter?

890
00:38:40,498 --> 00:38:42,333
It was parked
in a handicap zone.

891
00:38:42,375 --> 00:38:43,292
Perhaps they towed it.

892
00:38:44,794 --> 00:38:47,129
You fuckin' know
it's been stolen.

893
00:38:47,171 --> 00:38:50,091
Well, certainly that's
a possibility, Dude.

894
00:38:55,262 --> 00:38:56,639
Where you goin', Dude?

895
00:38:56,681 --> 00:38:58,140
I'm goin' home, Donny.

896
00:38:58,182 --> 00:39:00,017
Phone's ringing, Dude.

897
00:39:00,059 --> 00:39:02,061
Thank you, Donny.

898
00:39:18,160 --> 00:39:20,037
Green.

899
00:39:20,079 --> 00:39:22,832
Some brown or...

900
00:39:22,873 --> 00:39:25,251
Rust coloration.

901
00:39:25,292 --> 00:39:28,129
And was there anything
of value in the car?

902
00:39:29,588 --> 00:39:32,425
A tape deck,

903
00:39:32,466 --> 00:39:33,843
some Creedence tapes,

904
00:39:33,884 --> 00:39:36,721
and there was a...

905
00:39:36,762 --> 00:39:39,765
My briefcase.

906
00:39:41,475 --> 00:39:43,477
In the briefcase?

907
00:39:44,478 --> 00:39:46,355
Papers.

908
00:39:46,397 --> 00:39:48,357
You know, um,
just papers.

909
00:39:48,399 --> 00:39:51,527
You know, my papers.

910
00:39:51,569 --> 00:39:53,070
Business papers.

911
00:39:54,488 --> 00:39:56,324
And what do you do,
Sir?

912
00:39:56,365 --> 00:39:57,867
I'm unemployed.

913
00:40:01,662 --> 00:40:03,748
My rug was
also stolen.

914
00:40:03,789 --> 00:40:05,624
Your rug was in the car?

915
00:40:05,666 --> 00:40:06,584
No, here.

916
00:40:08,586 --> 00:40:09,962
Separate incidents?

917
00:40:10,963 --> 00:40:13,341
The Dude is not in.

918
00:40:13,382 --> 00:40:17,053
Do you find them much,
these stolen cars?

919
00:40:17,094 --> 00:40:19,430
Sometimes.

920
00:40:19,472 --> 00:40:21,432
Wouldn't hold out much hope
for the tape deck, though.

921
00:40:21,474 --> 00:40:23,351
Or the Creedence.

922
00:40:23,392 --> 00:40:26,270
Well, what about...

923
00:40:27,063 --> 00:40:28,022
The briefcase?

924
00:40:28,064 --> 00:40:29,440
Mr. Lebowski,
I'd like to see you.

925
00:40:29,482 --> 00:40:31,442
Call when you get home,
and I'll send a car for you.

926
00:40:31,484 --> 00:40:32,318
My name is Maude Lebowski.

927
00:40:32,360 --> 00:40:34,737
I'm the one
who took your rug.

928
00:40:35,780 --> 00:40:39,784
Guess we can close
the file on that one.

929
00:41:24,370 --> 00:41:27,248
El Franco, aydame abajo.

930
00:41:27,289 --> 00:41:30,793
I'll be with you
in a moment, Mr. Lebowski.

931
00:41:47,768 --> 00:41:51,147
Does the female form make you
uncomfortable, Mr. Lebowski?

932
00:41:51,188 --> 00:41:53,649
Is that what this
is a picture of?

933
00:41:53,691 --> 00:41:55,151
In a sense, yes.

934
00:41:55,192 --> 00:41:57,945
My art has been commended
as being strongly vaginal,

935
00:41:57,987 --> 00:41:58,946
which bothers some men.

936
00:41:58,988 --> 00:42:01,824
The word itself makes
some men uncomfortable.

937
00:42:01,866 --> 00:42:03,117
Vagina.

938
00:42:04,660 --> 00:42:06,537
Yes, they don't like hearing it
and find it difficult to say,

939
00:42:06,579 --> 00:42:07,955
whereas without
batting an eye,

940
00:42:07,997 --> 00:42:09,957
a man will refer to
his dick or his rod

941
00:42:09,999 --> 00:42:12,376
Or his... Johnson.

942
00:42:13,294 --> 00:42:14,253
Johnson?

943
00:42:14,295 --> 00:42:15,629
All right, Mr. Lebowski.

944
00:42:15,671 --> 00:42:17,131
Let's get down to cases.

945
00:42:17,173 --> 00:42:19,550
My father told me he agreed
to let you have the rug,

946
00:42:19,592 --> 00:42:21,927
but as it was a gift
from me to my late mother,

947
00:42:21,969 --> 00:42:22,928
it was not his to give.

948
00:42:22,970 --> 00:42:24,347
Now-

949
00:42:24,388 --> 00:42:26,223
Your face.

950
00:42:26,265 --> 00:42:28,142
As for this kidnapping...

951
00:42:29,685 --> 00:42:30,936
Yes, I know all about it,

952
00:42:30,978 --> 00:42:32,438
And I know that
you acted as courier.

953
00:42:32,480 --> 00:42:33,856
Let me tell you something.

954
00:42:33,898 --> 00:42:35,358
The whole thing stinks
to high heaven.

955
00:42:36,776 --> 00:42:38,653
Right, but let me
explain something

956
00:42:38,694 --> 00:42:40,154
About the rug.

957
00:42:40,196 --> 00:42:42,531
Do you like sex,
Mr. Lebowski?

958
00:42:42,573 --> 00:42:43,449
Excuse me?

959
00:42:43,491 --> 00:42:45,826
Sex. The physical act
of love. Coitus.

960
00:42:45,868 --> 00:42:47,328
Do you like it?

961
00:42:47,370 --> 00:42:49,246
I was talking
about my rug.

962
00:42:49,288 --> 00:42:51,123
You're not interested
in sex?

963
00:42:51,165 --> 00:42:52,625
You mean coitus?

964
00:42:52,667 --> 00:42:53,542
I like it, too.

965
00:42:53,584 --> 00:42:55,544
It's a male myth
about feminists

966
00:42:55,586 --> 00:42:56,420
That we hate sex.

967
00:42:56,462 --> 00:42:58,756
It can be a natural,
zesty enterprise.

968
00:42:58,798 --> 00:43:00,257
However, there
are some people-

969
00:43:00,299 --> 00:43:03,135
It is called satyriasis in men,
nymphomania in women-

970
00:43:03,177 --> 00:43:05,930
who engage in it compulsively
and without joy.

971
00:43:05,972 --> 00:43:06,931
Oh, no.

972
00:43:06,973 --> 00:43:08,849
Oh, yes, Mr. Lebowski.

973
00:43:08,891 --> 00:43:11,352
These unfortunate souls
cannot love

974
00:43:11,394 --> 00:43:12,853
in the true sense
of the word.

975
00:43:12,895 --> 00:43:16,148
Our mutual acquaintance
Bunny is one of these.

976
00:43:16,190 --> 00:43:17,650
Listen, Maude,

977
00:43:17,692 --> 00:43:21,445
I'm sorry if your
stepmother is a nympho,

978
00:43:21,487 --> 00:43:22,947
but, you know,

979
00:43:22,989 --> 00:43:25,241
I don't see what this
has to do with...

980
00:43:25,282 --> 00:43:26,617
Do you have any Kahlua?

981
00:43:26,659 --> 00:43:28,536
Take a look
at this, sir.

982
00:43:30,579 --> 00:43:32,999
Oh, I know that guy.

983
00:43:34,375 --> 00:43:36,877
He's a nihilist.

984
00:43:53,561 --> 00:43:55,438
Hello. Meine dispatcher says

985
00:43:55,479 --> 00:43:57,356
there's something wrong
mitt deine kable.

986
00:43:57,398 --> 00:43:59,233
Yeah, come on in.
I'm not really sure

987
00:43:59,275 --> 00:44:01,235
exactly what's really
wrong with the cable.

988
00:44:01,277 --> 00:44:03,154
Zat's why they sent me.
I am an expert.

989
00:44:03,195 --> 00:44:04,530
The TV's in here.

990
00:44:04,572 --> 00:44:06,574
You recognize her,
of course.

991
00:44:10,870 --> 00:44:12,246
Oh, that's my friend Shari.

992
00:44:12,288 --> 00:44:14,123
She just came over
to use the shower.

993
00:44:14,165 --> 00:44:16,125
The story
is ludicrous.

994
00:44:16,167 --> 00:44:19,420
Meine nommen is Karl.
Ich bin expert.

995
00:44:19,462 --> 00:44:20,921
You must be here
to fix the cable.

996
00:44:20,963 --> 00:44:24,258
Lord, you can imagine
where it goes from here.

997
00:44:24,300 --> 00:44:25,635
He fixes the cable?

998
00:44:25,676 --> 00:44:27,053
Don't be fatuous,
Jeffrey.

999
00:44:27,094 --> 00:44:29,430
Little matter to me
that this woman chose

1000
00:44:29,472 --> 00:44:30,931
to pursue a career
in pornography

1001
00:44:30,973 --> 00:44:33,351
nor that she has been
"banging" Jackie Treehorn,

1002
00:44:33,392 --> 00:44:35,227
to use the parlance
of our times,

1003
00:44:35,269 --> 00:44:36,729
however,

1004
00:44:36,771 --> 00:44:39,523
I am one of the 2 trustees
of the Lebowski Foundation,

1005
00:44:39,565 --> 00:44:41,025
the other being my father.

1006
00:44:41,067 --> 00:44:42,943
The Foundation takes
youngsters from watts and-

1007
00:44:42,985 --> 00:44:44,320
Shit, yeah,
the achievers.

1008
00:44:44,362 --> 00:44:45,821
Little Lebowski
urban achievers, yes,

1009
00:44:45,863 --> 00:44:47,740
and proud we are
of all of them,

1010
00:44:47,782 --> 00:44:50,618
I asked my father about
his withdrawal of $1 million

1011
00:44:50,660 --> 00:44:51,619
from the Foundation account,

1012
00:44:51,661 --> 00:44:53,537
and he told me
about this abduction.

1013
00:44:53,579 --> 00:44:54,955
But I tell you,
it is preposterous.

1014
00:44:54,997 --> 00:44:56,457
This compulsive fornicator

1015
00:44:56,499 --> 00:44:58,834
is taking my father
for the proverbial ride.

1016
00:44:58,876 --> 00:44:59,752
Yeah, but my-

1017
00:44:59,794 --> 00:45:00,753
I'm getting to your rug.

1018
00:45:00,795 --> 00:45:02,630
My father and I
don't get along.

1019
00:45:02,672 --> 00:45:04,131
He doesn't approve
of my lifestyle,

1020
00:45:04,173 --> 00:45:06,050
and, needless to say,
I don't approve of his.

1021
00:45:06,092 --> 00:45:08,928
However, I hardly wish to make
my father's embezzlement

1022
00:45:08,970 --> 00:45:09,845
a police matter,

1023
00:45:09,887 --> 00:45:12,640
so I'm proposing that you
try to recover the money

1024
00:45:12,682 --> 00:45:14,141
from the people
you delivered it to.

1025
00:45:14,183 --> 00:45:17,436
Well, I could do that.

1026
00:45:17,478 --> 00:45:20,439
If you successfully do so,
I will compensate you

1027
00:45:20,481 --> 00:45:24,819
to the tune of 10%
of the recovered sum.

1028
00:45:24,860 --> 00:45:25,736
A hundred...

1029
00:45:25,778 --> 00:45:28,155
Thousand. Yes.
Bones or clams

1030
00:45:28,197 --> 00:45:29,156
Or whatever you call them.

1031
00:45:29,198 --> 00:45:31,534
Yeah, but...

1032
00:45:31,575 --> 00:45:32,952
What about my...

1033
00:45:32,994 --> 00:45:34,954
Your rug, yes.
well, with that money

1034
00:45:34,996 --> 00:45:36,330
you can buy
any number of rugs

1035
00:45:36,372 --> 00:45:38,124
That don't have
sentimental value for me.

1036
00:45:38,165 --> 00:45:41,043
And I am sorry about
that crack on the jaw.

1037
00:45:41,085 --> 00:45:43,921
Oh, that's fine.
That doesn't even...

1038
00:45:43,963 --> 00:45:44,922
Here's the name and number
of a doctor

1039
00:45:44,964 --> 00:45:46,841
who will look at it
for you.

1040
00:45:46,882 --> 00:45:47,758
You will receive no bill.

1041
00:45:47,800 --> 00:45:49,218
He's a good man,
and thorough.

1042
00:45:49,260 --> 00:45:51,637
That's thoughtful,
But-

1043
00:45:51,679 --> 00:45:52,638
Please see him, Jeffrey.

1044
00:45:52,680 --> 00:45:54,557
He's a good man,
and thorough.

1045
00:45:56,475 --> 00:45:57,977
All right.
All right.

1046
00:45:59,395 --> 00:46:00,730
So he says, "My wife's
a pain in the ass.

1047
00:46:00,771 --> 00:46:02,732
She's always bustin'
my friggin' agates.

1048
00:46:02,773 --> 00:46:05,943
My daughter's married
to a real loser bastard,

1049
00:46:05,985 --> 00:46:08,321
and I got a rash
so bad on my ass

1050
00:46:08,362 --> 00:46:09,822
I can't even sit down.

1051
00:46:09,864 --> 00:46:12,742
But you know me, I can't
complain. "

1052
00:46:12,783 --> 00:46:14,618
Fuckin' a, man.
I got a rash, man.

1053
00:46:17,580 --> 00:46:20,458
I gotta tell you,
Tone, man,

1054
00:46:20,499 --> 00:46:22,918
Earlier in the day, I was
really feeling shitty, man.

1055
00:46:22,960 --> 00:46:24,837
Really down
in the dumps.

1056
00:46:24,879 --> 00:46:26,255
Lost a little money...

1057
00:46:26,297 --> 00:46:29,133
Hey, you know what?
forget about it?

1058
00:46:29,175 --> 00:46:30,134
Forget about it.

1059
00:46:30,176 --> 00:46:31,427
Yeah, fuck it, man.

1060
00:46:31,469 --> 00:46:32,845
I can't be worried
about that shit.

1061
00:46:32,887 --> 00:46:33,721
Life goes on, man.

1062
00:46:33,763 --> 00:46:36,265
Home, sweet home,
Mr. L.

1063
00:46:39,060 --> 00:46:41,437
Hey, yo. Look.

1064
00:46:41,479 --> 00:46:42,938
Who's your friend
in the Volkswagen?

1065
00:46:44,899 --> 00:46:47,318
Yeah, he followed us
here.

1066
00:46:47,360 --> 00:46:49,236
When did he start foll-
Aah!

1067
00:46:49,278 --> 00:46:50,237
What the fuck?!

1068
00:46:50,279 --> 00:46:52,657
In the limo, you son
of a bitch. No arguing.

1069
00:46:52,698 --> 00:46:55,034
Hey, careful, man.
there's a beverage here.

1070
00:46:56,494 --> 00:46:58,245
Start talking

1071
00:46:58,287 --> 00:46:59,246
and talk fast,
you lousy bum.

1072
00:46:59,288 --> 00:47:01,123
We've been frantically
trying to reach you, Dude.

1073
00:47:01,165 --> 00:47:04,168
Where's my goddamn
money, you bum?!

1074
00:47:05,086 --> 00:47:06,420
Well, we...

1075
00:47:07,463 --> 00:47:08,422
They did not

1076
00:47:08,464 --> 00:47:10,341
receive the money,
you nitwit!

1077
00:47:10,383 --> 00:47:11,717
They did not receive
the money!

1078
00:47:11,759 --> 00:47:14,136
Her life
was in your hands!

1079
00:47:14,178 --> 00:47:15,638
This is our concern,
Dude.

1080
00:47:15,680 --> 00:47:18,057
No, man,
nothing is fucked here.

1081
00:47:18,099 --> 00:47:18,933
Nothing is fucked?!

1082
00:47:18,975 --> 00:47:19,934
No, man.

1083
00:47:19,976 --> 00:47:20,935
The goddamn plane

1084
00:47:20,977 --> 00:47:23,354
Has crashed
into the mountain!

1085
00:47:23,396 --> 00:47:24,230
Look, man, come on.

1086
00:47:24,271 --> 00:47:27,525
Who are you gonna believe,
those guys or...

1087
00:47:27,566 --> 00:47:29,443
We dropped off
the damn money.

1088
00:47:32,863 --> 00:47:34,240
The royal we.

1089
00:47:34,281 --> 00:47:35,741
You know, the editorial.

1090
00:47:35,783 --> 00:47:38,119
I dropped off the money
exactly as per-

1091
00:47:38,160 --> 00:47:41,455
Look. Man, I've got certain
information, all right?

1092
00:47:41,497 --> 00:47:44,333
Certain things have
come to light, and...

1093
00:47:44,375 --> 00:47:46,752
You know, has it
ever occurred to you

1094
00:47:46,794 --> 00:47:50,631
that instead of
you know, running around,

1095
00:47:50,673 --> 00:47:54,343
blaming me, given the
nature of all this new shit,

1096
00:47:54,385 --> 00:47:57,346
thhis could be
a lot more...

1097
00:47:57,388 --> 00:48:00,224
Complex?

1098
00:48:00,266 --> 00:48:03,644
I mean, it might not be
just such a simple,

1099
00:48:03,686 --> 00:48:04,520
You know?

1100
00:48:04,562 --> 00:48:06,022
What in God's
holy name

1101
00:48:06,063 --> 00:48:07,857
Are you blathering
about?

1102
00:48:07,898 --> 00:48:10,818
Well, I'll tell you what
I'm blathering about.

1103
00:48:10,860 --> 00:48:12,236
I've got information, man.

1104
00:48:12,278 --> 00:48:14,155
New shit has come to light.

1105
00:48:14,196 --> 00:48:16,574
And, shit...

1106
00:48:18,075 --> 00:48:20,494
She kidnapped herself.

1107
00:48:21,787 --> 00:48:24,248
Well, sure, man.

1108
00:48:24,290 --> 00:48:27,043
Look at it. You know,
a young trophy wife-

1109
00:48:27,084 --> 00:48:29,045
In the parlance
of our times, you know-

1110
00:48:29,086 --> 00:48:32,340
She owes money all over town,

1111
00:48:32,381 --> 00:48:34,300
Including to known
pornographers.

1112
00:48:35,760 --> 00:48:38,638
And that's cool.
that-that's cool.

1113
00:48:38,679 --> 00:48:42,433
I'm saying,
she needs money, man.

1114
00:48:42,475 --> 00:48:43,934
And, you know,

1115
00:48:43,976 --> 00:48:46,228
of course they're gonna say
they didn't get it,

1116
00:48:46,270 --> 00:48:50,024
because she wants more, man.

1117
00:48:50,066 --> 00:48:53,569
She's gotta feed the monkey.
I mean...

1118
00:48:54,862 --> 00:48:57,740
Hasn't that ever occurred
to you, man?

1119
00:48:57,782 --> 00:49:00,076
Sir?

1120
00:49:01,160 --> 00:49:02,536
No, Mr. Lebowski,

1121
00:49:02,578 --> 00:49:04,538
it had not occurred
to me.

1122
00:49:04,580 --> 00:49:06,457
That had not occurred
to us, Dude.

1123
00:49:06,499 --> 00:49:08,334
Well, ok, you know,

1124
00:49:08,376 --> 00:49:10,836
you guys aren't privy
to all the new shit, so...

1125
00:49:10,878 --> 00:49:13,547
You know. But...

1126
00:49:13,589 --> 00:49:17,093
Hey, that's what you-
that's what you pay me for.

1127
00:49:18,386 --> 00:49:21,222
Speaking of which,
do you think that you could,

1128
00:49:21,263 --> 00:49:23,641
give me my 20,000 in cash?

1129
00:49:23,683 --> 00:49:26,519
My concern is-and I gotta
check with my accountant-

1130
00:49:26,560 --> 00:49:28,938
but this might bump me
into a higher tax,

1131
00:49:28,980 --> 00:49:29,939
Brandt...

1132
00:49:29,981 --> 00:49:31,857
Give him
the envelope.

1133
00:49:31,899 --> 00:49:35,236
Oh, well, if you've already
got the check made out,

1134
00:49:35,277 --> 00:49:36,320
That's cool.

1135
00:49:36,362 --> 00:49:38,781
We received this
this morning.

1136
00:49:40,199 --> 00:49:43,452
Since you have
failed to achieve,

1137
00:49:43,494 --> 00:49:46,831
even in the modest task
which was your charge,

1138
00:49:46,872 --> 00:49:50,626
since you have
stolen my money,

1139
00:49:50,668 --> 00:49:54,046
since you have unrepentantly
betrayed my trust...

1140
00:49:54,088 --> 00:49:55,423
I have no choice

1141
00:49:55,464 --> 00:50:00,344
but to tell these bums to do
whatever is necessary

1142
00:50:00,386 --> 00:50:04,140
to recover their money
from you, Jeffrey Lebowski.

1143
00:50:04,181 --> 00:50:06,934
And with Brandt
as my witness,

1144
00:50:06,976 --> 00:50:08,352
I will tell you this:

1145
00:50:08,394 --> 00:50:12,231
Any further harm
visited upon Bunny

1146
00:50:12,273 --> 00:50:16,986
will be visited tenfold
upon your head.

1147
00:50:18,487 --> 00:50:23,743
By god, sir, I will not
abide another toe.

1148
00:50:23,784 --> 00:50:29,123
# I hear the cottonwoods
whisperin' above #

1149
00:50:29,165 --> 00:50:32,543
That wasn't her toe, Dude.

1150
00:50:32,585 --> 00:50:34,253
Whose toe was it,
Walter?

1151
00:50:34,295 --> 00:50:35,254
How the fuck should I know?

1152
00:50:35,296 --> 00:50:37,631
I do know that nothing
about it indicates-

1153
00:50:37,673 --> 00:50:39,050
Man, the nail
polish, Walter.

1154
00:50:39,091 --> 00:50:40,551
Fine, Dude.

1155
00:50:40,593 --> 00:50:42,428
As if it's impossible
to get some nail polish,

1156
00:50:42,470 --> 00:50:43,846
Apply it
To someone else's toe.

1157
00:50:43,888 --> 00:50:45,348
Someone else's-

1158
00:50:45,389 --> 00:50:47,224
Where the fuck
are they gonna get-

1159
00:50:47,266 --> 00:50:49,143
You want a toe?
I can get you a toe.

1160
00:50:49,185 --> 00:50:51,520
Believe me,
there are ways, Dude.

1161
00:50:51,562 --> 00:50:53,439
You don't wanna know
about it, believe me.

1162
00:50:53,481 --> 00:50:55,441
Hell, I can get you a toe
by 3:00 this afternoon,

1163
00:50:55,483 --> 00:50:56,317
with nail polish.

1164
00:50:56,359 --> 00:50:58,319
These fuckin' amateurs.

1165
00:50:58,361 --> 00:50:59,320
Walter-

1166
00:50:59,362 --> 00:51:00,738
They send us a toe,

1167
00:51:00,780 --> 00:51:02,156
we're supposed to shit
ourselves with fear.

1168
00:51:02,198 --> 00:51:03,157
Jesus Christ. Walter-

1169
00:51:03,199 --> 00:51:04,033
Now, the point is-

1170
00:51:04,075 --> 00:51:05,534
They're gonna kill her,
Walter,

1171
00:51:05,576 --> 00:51:07,453
And then they're gonna
kill me.

1172
00:51:09,372 --> 00:51:10,831
That's...

1173
00:51:10,873 --> 00:51:12,750
That's just the stress
talking, man.

1174
00:51:12,792 --> 00:51:15,628
Now so far we have
what appears to me

1175
00:51:15,670 --> 00:51:18,047
To be a series of
victimless crimes.

1176
00:51:18,089 --> 00:51:18,923
What about the toe?

1177
00:51:18,964 --> 00:51:20,424
Forget about
the fucking toe!

1178
00:51:20,466 --> 00:51:22,343
Excuse me, sir,

1179
00:51:22,385 --> 00:51:23,719
Could you please
keep your voices down?

1180
00:51:23,761 --> 00:51:25,221
This is a family restaurant.

1181
00:51:25,262 --> 00:51:26,555
Please, dear.

1182
00:51:26,597 --> 00:51:28,557
For your information,
the supreme court

1183
00:51:28,599 --> 00:51:30,935
has roundly rejected
prior restraint!

1184
00:51:30,977 --> 00:51:32,853
Walter, this is not
a first amendment thing.

1185
00:51:32,895 --> 00:51:34,230
If you don't calm down,

1186
00:51:34,271 --> 00:51:35,731
I'm gonna have to ask you
to leave.

1187
00:51:35,773 --> 00:51:39,026
Lady, I got buddies who
died face down in the muck

1188
00:51:39,068 --> 00:51:41,946
so you and I could enjoy
this family restaurant!

1189
00:51:41,988 --> 00:51:43,447
All right,
I'm outta here.

1190
00:51:43,489 --> 00:51:44,824
Hey, Dude,
don't go away, man.

1191
00:51:44,865 --> 00:51:46,742
Come on, this affects
all of us, man.

1192
00:51:46,784 --> 00:51:49,078
Our basic freedoms!

1193
00:51:53,499 --> 00:51:54,458
I'm stayin'.

1194
00:51:56,377 --> 00:51:58,879
I'm finishing my coffee.

1195
00:52:03,092 --> 00:52:05,094
Enjoying my coffee.

1196
00:52:19,859 --> 00:52:22,737
The Dude is not in.

1197
00:52:22,778 --> 00:52:24,655
Leave a message
after the beep.

1198
00:52:24,697 --> 00:52:26,073
Thanks, man.

1199
00:52:27,074 --> 00:52:29,035
Mr. Lebowski, this is
duty officer Rolvaag

1200
00:52:29,076 --> 00:52:30,453
of the LAPD.

1201
00:52:30,494 --> 00:52:31,954
We've recovered
your automobile.

1202
00:52:31,996 --> 00:52:34,248
It can be claimed at the
North Hollywood auto circus

1203
00:52:34,290 --> 00:52:35,124
there on Victory.

1204
00:52:35,166 --> 00:52:36,625
Far out, man.

1205
00:52:36,667 --> 00:52:38,169
Far fucking out!

1206
00:52:48,679 --> 00:52:51,182
This is a private
residence, man.

1207
00:52:58,773 --> 00:53:01,776
Nice marmot.

1208
00:53:10,284 --> 00:53:14,955
Ve vant the money,
Lebowski.

1209
00:53:19,377 --> 00:53:21,754
You think
ve are kidding

1210
00:53:21,796 --> 00:53:23,631
Or making with
the funny stuff?

1211
00:53:23,673 --> 00:53:24,632
There are things

1212
00:53:24,674 --> 00:53:26,550
you haven't dreamed of,
Lebowski.

1213
00:53:26,592 --> 00:53:27,551
Ja. Ve believe
in nothing.

1214
00:53:27,593 --> 00:53:29,428
He believes in nothing,
Lebowski, nothing.

1215
00:53:29,470 --> 00:53:30,846
and tomorrow
ve come back

1216
00:53:30,888 --> 00:53:31,847
and ve cut off
your chonson.

1217
00:53:31,889 --> 00:53:33,224
Excuse me?

1218
00:53:33,265 --> 00:53:34,725
I said we'll cut off
Your Johnson!

1219
00:53:34,767 --> 00:53:37,144
Just think about that,
Lebowski.

1220
00:53:37,186 --> 00:53:40,147
Ja, your viggly penis,
Lebowski.

1221
00:53:40,189 --> 00:53:44,068
Ja, and maybe we stomp on it
and sqoosh it, Lebowski.

1222
00:53:50,574 --> 00:53:52,952
It was discovered
last night in Van Nuys

1223
00:53:52,994 --> 00:53:55,454
lodged against
an abutment.

1224
00:53:55,496 --> 00:53:56,455
Oh, man, lodged where?

1225
00:53:56,497 --> 00:53:58,332
You're lucky she
didn't get chopped,

1226
00:53:58,374 --> 00:53:59,333
Mr. Lebowski.

1227
00:54:00,376 --> 00:54:01,752
Must've been
a joyride situation.

1228
00:54:01,794 --> 00:54:03,129
They abandoned
the vehicle

1229
00:54:03,170 --> 00:54:04,130
once they hit
the retaining wall.

1230
00:54:04,171 --> 00:54:06,048
Oh, my
fucking briefcase!

1231
00:54:06,090 --> 00:54:07,925
Man, it's not here.
Shit!

1232
00:54:07,967 --> 00:54:08,843
Yeah, I saw that
on the report. Sorry.

1233
00:54:08,884 --> 00:54:11,721
You gotta get in
on the other side.

1234
00:54:11,762 --> 00:54:14,640
The side-view was
found on the road

1235
00:54:14,682 --> 00:54:17,018
by the car.

1236
00:54:17,059 --> 00:54:18,936
You're lucky they left
the tape deck, though,

1237
00:54:18,978 --> 00:54:20,855
And the Creedence.

1238
00:54:20,896 --> 00:54:24,233
Jesus! What's that smell, man?

1239
00:54:24,275 --> 00:54:26,152
Probably a vagrant
slept in the car

1240
00:54:26,193 --> 00:54:29,030
or maybe just used it
as a toilet and moved on.

1241
00:54:31,490 --> 00:54:33,826
Are you gonna find
these guys or, you know,

1242
00:54:33,868 --> 00:54:37,246
I mean, you got any
promising, leads or...

1243
00:54:37,288 --> 00:54:38,622
Leads?

1244
00:54:38,664 --> 00:54:41,042
Yeah. Sure.

1245
00:54:41,083 --> 00:54:43,044
I'll just check
with the boys

1246
00:54:43,085 --> 00:54:43,919
down at
the crime lab.

1247
00:54:43,961 --> 00:54:46,339
They got
4 more detectives

1248
00:54:46,380 --> 00:54:47,840
Working on the case.

1249
00:54:47,882 --> 00:54:50,217
They got us
working in shifts.

1250
00:54:54,597 --> 00:54:56,432
Leads.

1251
00:54:56,474 --> 00:54:59,852
My only hope is that
the big Lebowski kills me

1252
00:54:59,894 --> 00:55:01,646
Before the Germans
can cut my dick off.

1253
00:55:01,687 --> 00:55:03,522
Now, that is just
ridiculous, Dude.

1254
00:55:03,564 --> 00:55:04,940
No one's going to
cut your dick off.

1255
00:55:04,982 --> 00:55:06,317
Thank you, Walter.

1256
00:55:06,359 --> 00:55:07,818
Not if I have anything
to say about it.

1257
00:55:07,860 --> 00:55:08,736
Thank you, Walter.

1258
00:55:08,778 --> 00:55:10,738
That makes me feel
very secure.

1259
00:55:11,697 --> 00:55:13,240
That makes me feel
very warm inside.

1260
00:55:13,282 --> 00:55:14,158
Now, Dude.

1261
00:55:14,200 --> 00:55:16,535
This whole
fuckin' thing.

1262
00:55:16,577 --> 00:55:17,536
I could be sitting here

1263
00:55:17,578 --> 00:55:19,955
with just pee stains
on my rug.

1264
00:55:20,998 --> 00:55:22,333
But, no, man,
I gotta, you know.

1265
00:55:22,375 --> 00:55:23,334
Fucking Germans.

1266
00:55:23,376 --> 00:55:25,252
Nothing changes.

1267
00:55:25,294 --> 00:55:27,129
Fucking Nazis.

1268
00:55:27,171 --> 00:55:28,047
They were Nazis, Dude?

1269
00:55:28,089 --> 00:55:29,423
Oh, come on, Donny.

1270
00:55:29,465 --> 00:55:31,342
They were threatening
castration.

1271
00:55:31,384 --> 00:55:32,843
Are we gonna
split hairs here?

1272
00:55:32,885 --> 00:55:33,844
No.

1273
00:55:33,886 --> 00:55:34,720
Am I wrong?

1274
00:55:34,762 --> 00:55:35,721
Well, he

1275
00:55:35,763 --> 00:55:37,139
They were
nihilists, man.

1276
00:55:38,182 --> 00:55:40,017
They kept saying
they believed in nothing.

1277
00:55:40,059 --> 00:55:42,061
Nihilists.

1278
00:55:42,979 --> 00:55:44,480
Fuck me.

1279
00:55:45,898 --> 00:55:46,732
I mean,
say what you want

1280
00:55:46,774 --> 00:55:48,234
about the tenets

1281
00:55:48,275 --> 00:55:49,151
of national
Socialism, Dude.

1282
00:55:49,193 --> 00:55:50,653
At least
it's an ethos.

1283
00:55:50,695 --> 00:55:52,530
And also,
let's not forget-

1284
00:55:52,571 --> 00:55:54,031
Let's not forget,
Dude-

1285
00:55:54,073 --> 00:55:55,825
That keeping
wildlife,

1286
00:55:55,866 --> 00:55:57,243
an amphibious rodent

1287
00:55:57,284 --> 00:55:59,620
for you know, domestic...

1288
00:55:59,662 --> 00:56:02,540
Within the city...

1289
00:56:02,581 --> 00:56:04,041
That ain't legal
either.

1290
00:56:04,083 --> 00:56:05,918
What are you,
a fucking park ranger now?

1291
00:56:05,960 --> 00:56:07,837
No, I'm
just trying-

1292
00:56:07,878 --> 00:56:10,256
Who gives a shit
about the fucking marmot?

1293
00:56:10,297 --> 00:56:12,133
We are sympathizing
here, Dude.

1294
00:56:12,174 --> 00:56:13,217
Fuck sympathy.

1295
00:56:13,259 --> 00:56:15,636
I don't need your
fucking sympathy, man.

1296
00:56:15,678 --> 00:56:18,055
I need my
fucking Johnson.

1297
00:56:18,097 --> 00:56:19,432
What do you need
that for, Dude?

1298
00:56:19,473 --> 00:56:20,933
You have got to
buck up, man!

1299
00:56:20,975 --> 00:56:22,727
You cannot drag
this negative energy

1300
00:56:22,768 --> 00:56:24,228
Into the tournament.

1301
00:56:24,270 --> 00:56:26,689
Fuck the tournament.
Fuck you, Walter.

1302
00:56:29,066 --> 00:56:31,444
Fuck the tournament?

1303
00:56:31,485 --> 00:56:32,820
Ok, Dude. I can see

1304
00:56:32,862 --> 00:56:33,821
you don't want to be
cheered up here.

1305
00:56:33,863 --> 00:56:34,739
Come on, Donny.

1306
00:56:34,780 --> 00:56:36,198
Let's go get us
a lane.

1307
00:56:41,078 --> 00:56:42,955
Another Caucasian, Gary.

1308
00:56:42,997 --> 00:56:44,373
Right, Dude.

1309
00:56:45,875 --> 00:56:47,752
Friends like these Gary?

1310
00:56:47,793 --> 00:56:49,670
That's right, Dude.

1311
00:57:11,776 --> 00:57:14,153
Do you have
A good sarsaparilla?

1312
00:57:14,195 --> 00:57:16,447
Sioux city sarsaparilla?

1313
00:57:16,489 --> 00:57:18,991
Yeah. That's a good one.

1314
00:57:21,285 --> 00:57:23,120
How you doin'
there, Dude?

1315
00:57:23,162 --> 00:57:25,539
Not too good, man.

1316
00:57:25,581 --> 00:57:27,541
One of those days?

1317
00:57:29,460 --> 00:57:30,336
Well...

1318
00:57:30,378 --> 00:57:34,256
A wiser fella than myself
once said,

1319
00:57:34,298 --> 00:57:37,134
"Sometimes you eat
the bar and-"

1320
00:57:37,176 --> 00:57:39,136
Much obliged.

1321
00:57:39,178 --> 00:57:42,431
"And sometimes
the bar, well...

1322
00:57:42,473 --> 00:57:43,849
He eats you. "

1323
00:57:43,891 --> 00:57:47,144
That some kind
of eastern thing?

1324
00:57:47,186 --> 00:57:49,188
Far from it.

1325
00:57:54,986 --> 00:57:57,822
I like your style,
Dude.

1326
00:57:57,863 --> 00:57:59,740
Well...

1327
00:57:59,782 --> 00:58:02,118
I dig your style, too,
man.

1328
00:58:02,159 --> 00:58:05,079
You got
a whole cowboy thing going.

1329
00:58:08,791 --> 00:58:09,750
Thankie.

1330
00:58:09,792 --> 00:58:12,253
There's just one thing,
Dude.

1331
00:58:12,294 --> 00:58:13,629
And what's that?

1332
00:58:13,671 --> 00:58:17,174
Do you have to use
so many cuss words?

1333
00:58:19,468 --> 00:58:21,470
What the fuck
are you talking about?

1334
00:58:23,264 --> 00:58:24,223
Ok, Dude,

1335
00:58:24,265 --> 00:58:27,143
Have it your way.

1336
00:58:27,184 --> 00:58:30,021
Take her easy, Dude.

1337
00:58:30,062 --> 00:58:32,565
Yeah. Thanks, man.

1338
00:58:37,194 --> 00:58:39,196
Call for you, Dude.

1339
00:58:43,492 --> 00:58:46,245
Jeffrey, you have
not gone to the doctor.

1340
00:58:46,287 --> 00:58:49,123
I haven't yet.

1341
00:58:50,166 --> 00:58:52,626
I'd like to see you
immediately.

1342
00:59:05,681 --> 00:59:08,017
So you're Lebowski.

1343
00:59:11,687 --> 00:59:13,856
Maude has told me
all about you.

1344
00:59:13,898 --> 00:59:15,858
She'll be back
in a minute. Sit down.

1345
00:59:15,900 --> 00:59:17,652
Do you want a drink?

1346
00:59:17,693 --> 00:59:20,029
Yeah, sure.
White Russian.

1347
00:59:20,071 --> 00:59:22,073
The bar's over there.

1348
00:59:26,369 --> 00:59:29,121
So what do you do,
Lebowski?

1349
00:59:29,163 --> 00:59:31,082
Who the fuck are you,
man?

1350
00:59:32,083 --> 00:59:33,918
Just a friend
of Maudie's.

1351
00:59:33,959 --> 00:59:35,878
Yeah, the friend
with the cleft asshole?

1352
00:59:37,880 --> 00:59:40,257
What do you do?

1353
00:59:40,299 --> 00:59:42,134
Nothing much.

1354
00:59:42,176 --> 00:59:43,636
Hello, Jeffrey.

1355
00:59:43,678 --> 00:59:44,553
Hello.

1356
00:59:44,595 --> 00:59:45,930
Yeah, how are you?

1357
00:59:45,972 --> 00:59:46,847
Listen, Maude,

1358
00:59:46,889 --> 00:59:49,892
I got to...

1359
00:59:51,268 --> 00:59:54,146
Tender my resignation
or whatever,

1360
00:59:54,188 --> 00:59:56,524
Because it looks like your mother

1361
00:59:56,565 --> 00:59:58,442
really was kidnapped
after all.

1362
00:59:58,484 --> 01:00:01,320
She most certainly
was not.

1363
01:00:01,362 --> 01:00:04,240
Hey, man, why
don't you fucking...

1364
01:00:04,281 --> 01:00:05,658
Listen occasionally?

1365
01:00:05,700 --> 01:00:06,617
You might
learn something.

1366
01:00:06,659 --> 01:00:08,536
Now, I got-

1367
01:00:08,577 --> 01:00:10,079
Please don't call her
my mother.

1368
01:00:10,997 --> 01:00:12,331
She's most definitely
the perpetrator

1369
01:00:12,373 --> 01:00:13,833
and not the victim.

1370
01:00:13,874 --> 01:00:16,752
I'm telling you, I got
pretty definitive evidence-

1371
01:00:16,794 --> 01:00:17,628
From who?

1372
01:00:17,670 --> 01:00:19,130
From the main guy-
Oolie.

1373
01:00:19,171 --> 01:00:20,548
Oolie Coco?

1374
01:00:20,589 --> 01:00:22,425
Her co-star in
the beaver picture?

1375
01:00:22,466 --> 01:00:25,219
Beaver?
you mean vagina-

1376
01:00:25,261 --> 01:00:27,638
I mean,
you know the guy?

1377
01:00:27,680 --> 01:00:29,557
I might have introduced them
for all I know.

1378
01:00:29,598 --> 01:00:31,517
Do you remember Oolie?

1379
01:00:32,476 --> 01:00:34,854
He's a musician. Used
to have a group-Autobahn.

1380
01:00:34,895 --> 01:00:36,355
Look in my LP's.

1381
01:00:36,397 --> 01:00:39,233
They released one album
in the late seventies.

1382
01:00:39,275 --> 01:00:42,153
Their music is sort of
a- ugh-technopop.

1383
01:00:42,194 --> 01:00:44,530
So he's pretending to be
the abductor?

1384
01:00:44,572 --> 01:00:45,448
Well, yeah.

1385
01:00:45,489 --> 01:00:48,326
Look, Jeffrey, you don't
really kidnap someone

1386
01:00:48,367 --> 01:00:49,327
you're acquainted with.

1387
01:00:49,368 --> 01:00:50,119
The whole idea

1388
01:00:50,161 --> 01:00:51,620
is that the hostage can't
be able to identify you

1389
01:00:51,662 --> 01:00:53,122
after you've let them go.

1390
01:00:53,164 --> 01:00:54,582
I know that.

1391
01:00:57,960 --> 01:01:00,338
What the fuck
is with this guy?

1392
01:01:00,379 --> 01:01:01,839
Who is he?

1393
01:01:01,881 --> 01:01:02,757
Knox Harrington.

1394
01:01:02,798 --> 01:01:04,175
The video artist.

1395
01:01:05,593 --> 01:01:07,053
So Oolie
has the money?

1396
01:01:07,094 --> 01:01:08,429
Well...

1397
01:01:08,471 --> 01:01:10,848
Not exactly.

1398
01:01:11,891 --> 01:01:14,393
This is a very
complicated case, Maude.

1399
01:01:15,186 --> 01:01:16,145
A lot of ins,
a lot of outs,

1400
01:01:16,187 --> 01:01:18,522
a lot of what-have-yous,
and,

1401
01:01:18,564 --> 01:01:20,441
a lot of strands
to keep in my head, man.

1402
01:01:20,483 --> 01:01:22,443
A lot of strands
in old Duder's head.

1403
01:01:22,485 --> 01:01:23,319
Hello?

1404
01:01:23,361 --> 01:01:24,820
If Oolie doesn't have it,
then who does?

1405
01:01:24,862 --> 01:01:27,657
It's Sandra, about the Bearnali.

1406
01:01:27,698 --> 01:01:29,158
Look, I have to take this.

1407
01:01:29,200 --> 01:01:31,035
Do you still have
that doctor's number?

1408
01:01:31,077 --> 01:01:32,953
Oh. No, really. It's
not even bruised anymore.

1409
01:01:32,995 --> 01:01:34,455
Oh, please, Jeffrey,

1410
01:01:34,497 --> 01:01:35,331
I don't want
to be responsible

1411
01:01:35,373 --> 01:01:37,375
For any delayed
after-effects.

1412
01:01:38,793 --> 01:01:39,752
After-effects?

1413
01:01:39,794 --> 01:01:41,796
See, see.

1414
01:02:08,990 --> 01:02:10,741
Could you slide
your shorts down,

1415
01:02:10,783 --> 01:02:12,451
Mr. Lebowski, please?

1416
01:02:14,161 --> 01:02:16,038
No. No, man.
She hit me right here.

1417
01:02:16,080 --> 01:02:17,540
I understand.

1418
01:02:17,581 --> 01:02:20,084
Could you slide
your shorts down, please?

1419
01:02:30,261 --> 01:02:32,638
# Just got home
from Illinois #

1420
01:02:32,680 --> 01:02:35,057
# Lock the front door,
oh, boy #

1421
01:02:35,099 --> 01:02:38,728
# Got to sit down,
take a rest on the porch #

1422
01:02:38,769 --> 01:02:41,147
# Imagination sets in #

1423
01:02:41,188 --> 01:02:43,524
# Pretty soon I'm singin' #

1424
01:02:45,067 --> 01:02:47,445
# Lookin' out my back door #

1425
01:02:47,486 --> 01:02:49,822
# There's a giant
doing cartwheels #

1426
01:02:49,864 --> 01:02:52,241
# A statue
wearin' high heels #

1427
01:02:52,283 --> 01:02:54,618
# Look at all
the happy creatures #

1428
01:02:54,660 --> 01:02:56,537
# Dancin' on the lawn #

1429
01:02:56,579 --> 01:02:58,539
# A dinosaur Victrola #

1430
01:02:58,581 --> 01:03:01,334
# Listenin' to Buck Owens #

1431
01:03:02,877 --> 01:03:03,753
# Lookin' out my back door #

1432
01:03:05,087 --> 01:03:09,091
# Tambourines and elephants
are playing in the band #

1433
01:03:12,386 --> 01:03:13,846
# Wondrous apparition #

1434
01:03:13,888 --> 01:03:16,641
# Provided by magician #

1435
01:03:18,184 --> 01:03:21,187
# Lookin' out my back door #

1436
01:03:38,287 --> 01:03:40,122
# Tambourines
and elephants #

1437
01:03:40,164 --> 01:03:42,541
# Are playing in the band #

1438
01:03:42,583 --> 01:03:45,920
# Won't you take a ride
on the flyin' spoon? #

1439
01:03:47,463 --> 01:03:49,256
# Bother me tomorrow #

1440
01:03:49,298 --> 01:03:51,717
# Today I'll buy
no sorrows #

1441
01:03:53,678 --> 01:03:56,764
# Lookin' out my back door #

1442
01:04:45,479 --> 01:04:46,939
He lives
in north Hollywood,

1443
01:04:46,981 --> 01:04:49,358
on Radford, near
the in-n-out burger.

1444
01:04:49,400 --> 01:04:50,735
The in-n-out burger's
on Camrose.

1445
01:04:50,776 --> 01:04:52,153
Near the in-n-out burger.

1446
01:04:52,194 --> 01:04:54,030
Those are good burgers,
Walter.

1447
01:04:54,071 --> 01:04:55,448
Shut the fuck up,
Donny.

1448
01:04:55,489 --> 01:04:56,449
The kid is in
ninth grade, Dude,

1449
01:04:56,490 --> 01:04:59,327
And his father is-
Are you ready for this?

1450
01:04:59,368 --> 01:05:01,829
His father is
Arthur Digby Sellers.

1451
01:05:01,871 --> 01:05:03,748
Who the fuck is that?

1452
01:05:04,790 --> 01:05:06,542
Who the fuck is
Arthur Digby Sellers?

1453
01:05:06,584 --> 01:05:09,420
Ever heard of a little show
called branded, Dude?

1454
01:05:09,462 --> 01:05:10,338
Yes, I know-

1455
01:05:10,379 --> 01:05:12,340
All but one man died
there at bitter creek?

1456
01:05:12,381 --> 01:05:15,217
I know the fucking show,
Walter. So what?

1457
01:05:15,259 --> 01:05:17,928
Fucking Arthur Digby Sellers
wrote 156 episodes, Dude.

1458
01:05:18,971 --> 01:05:20,348
The bulk
of the series.

1459
01:05:21,390 --> 01:05:22,725
Not exactly
a lightweight.

1460
01:05:22,767 --> 01:05:23,726
No.

1461
01:05:23,768 --> 01:05:26,145
And yet his son
is a fucking dunce.

1462
01:05:27,688 --> 01:05:30,441
Anyway, we'll go there
after the what-have-you,

1463
01:05:30,483 --> 01:05:32,026
we'll brace the kid,
should be a pushover.

1464
01:05:32,068 --> 01:05:33,444
We'll be near
the in-n-out burger.

1465
01:05:33,486 --> 01:05:36,322
Shut the fuck up,
Donny!

1466
01:05:36,364 --> 01:05:38,240
We'll go out there,
we'll brace the kid,

1467
01:05:38,282 --> 01:05:40,242
He should be a pushover.

1468
01:05:40,284 --> 01:05:42,119
We'll get that fucking
$1 million back-

1469
01:05:42,161 --> 01:05:44,538
If he hasn't spent it
already.

1470
01:05:44,580 --> 01:05:45,831
A million fucking clams.

1471
01:05:45,873 --> 01:05:48,250
And yes, we'll be near
the...

1472
01:05:48,292 --> 01:05:49,752
In-n-out.

1473
01:05:50,670 --> 01:05:51,629
Some burgers,

1474
01:05:51,671 --> 01:05:52,630
some beers,

1475
01:05:52,672 --> 01:05:53,589
a few laughs.

1476
01:05:55,591 --> 01:05:58,970
Our fucking troubles
are over, Dude.

1477
01:06:09,981 --> 01:06:12,733
Oh, fuck me, man!

1478
01:06:12,775 --> 01:06:16,028
That kid's already spent
all the money, man!

1479
01:06:16,070 --> 01:06:17,530
New 'vette?
Hardly, Dude.

1480
01:06:17,571 --> 01:06:22,326
I'd say he still has
960, $970,000 left,

1481
01:06:22,368 --> 01:06:24,245
depending on the options.

1482
01:06:24,286 --> 01:06:25,287
Wait in the car, Donny.

1483
01:06:29,291 --> 01:06:30,668
Pilar?

1484
01:06:32,169 --> 01:06:33,546
My name
is Walter Sobchak.

1485
01:06:33,587 --> 01:06:36,424
This is my associate
Jeffrey Lebowski.

1486
01:06:36,465 --> 01:06:38,718
We came to talk
about little Larry.

1487
01:06:38,759 --> 01:06:40,219
May we come in?

1488
01:06:40,261 --> 01:06:41,637
Yes, yes.

1489
01:06:41,679 --> 01:06:42,596
Thank you.

1490
01:06:47,059 --> 01:06:48,561
That's him, Dude.

1491
01:06:55,776 --> 01:06:58,154
And a good day to you,
Sir!

1492
01:06:58,195 --> 01:07:00,698
Sit down, please.

1493
01:07:05,286 --> 01:07:08,122
Larry, sweetie,
that man is here!

1494
01:07:08,164 --> 01:07:09,540
Is he...

1495
01:07:09,582 --> 01:07:11,042
Does he still write?

1496
01:07:11,083 --> 01:07:12,418
Oh, no, no.

1497
01:07:12,460 --> 01:07:14,337
He has health problems.

1498
01:07:16,797 --> 01:07:19,133
Sir, I just want to say...

1499
01:07:19,175 --> 01:07:20,635
That we're both,

1500
01:07:20,676 --> 01:07:22,637
on a personal level...

1501
01:07:22,678 --> 01:07:25,556
Really enormous fans.

1502
01:07:25,598 --> 01:07:28,851
Branded, especially
the early episodes,

1503
01:07:28,893 --> 01:07:30,853
was truly a source
of inspiration-

1504
01:07:30,895 --> 01:07:32,146
Sweetie, sit down!

1505
01:07:32,188 --> 01:07:33,147
This man is the police.

1506
01:07:33,189 --> 01:07:34,148
Oh, no, ma'am,

1507
01:07:34,190 --> 01:07:35,524
we didn't want
to give the impression

1508
01:07:35,566 --> 01:07:36,525
that we were police
exactly.

1509
01:07:36,567 --> 01:07:38,444
We're hoping
it won't be necessary

1510
01:07:38,486 --> 01:07:39,320
to call the police.

1511
01:07:39,362 --> 01:07:42,239
But that's up
to little Larry here.

1512
01:07:42,281 --> 01:07:43,699
Isn't it, Larry?

1513
01:07:53,876 --> 01:07:56,295
Is this your homework,
Larry?

1514
01:07:59,090 --> 01:07:59,924
Look, man-

1515
01:07:59,965 --> 01:08:00,925
Dude, please.

1516
01:08:00,966 --> 01:08:02,843
Is this your homework,
Larry?

1517
01:08:02,885 --> 01:08:04,720
Just ask him
about the car, man.

1518
01:08:04,762 --> 01:08:05,721
Is this yours, Larry?

1519
01:08:05,763 --> 01:08:07,139
Is this your homework,
Larry?

1520
01:08:07,181 --> 01:08:08,641
Is that your car
out front?

1521
01:08:08,683 --> 01:08:09,517
Is this your homework,
Larry?

1522
01:08:09,558 --> 01:08:11,018
We know it's
his fucking homework!

1523
01:08:11,060 --> 01:08:13,437
Where's the fucking money,
you little brat?

1524
01:08:13,479 --> 01:08:15,356
Look, Larry...

1525
01:08:15,398 --> 01:08:16,357
Have you ever heard
of Vietnam?

1526
01:08:16,399 --> 01:08:18,234
You're entering
a world of pain, son.

1527
01:08:18,275 --> 01:08:19,735
we know that this is
your homework.

1528
01:08:19,777 --> 01:08:21,153
We know that you stole
the car.

1529
01:08:21,195 --> 01:08:22,530
And the fucking money!

1530
01:08:24,073 --> 01:08:25,449
And we know that this
is your homework.

1531
01:08:25,491 --> 01:08:26,826
We're gonna cut
your dick off, Larry.

1532
01:08:26,867 --> 01:08:29,370
You're killing
your father, Larry.

1533
01:08:31,163 --> 01:08:32,540
All right.

1534
01:08:32,581 --> 01:08:34,041
This is pointless.

1535
01:08:35,459 --> 01:08:38,379
It's time for plan "b. "

1536
01:08:39,380 --> 01:08:43,134
You might want to watch out
that front window, Larry.

1537
01:08:43,175 --> 01:08:45,136
Son, this is what happens

1538
01:08:45,177 --> 01:08:47,596
when you fuck a stranger
in the ass!

1539
01:08:49,098 --> 01:08:50,433
Little language problem
here.

1540
01:08:50,474 --> 01:08:53,728
The little prick's
stonewalling me.

1541
01:08:55,688 --> 01:08:57,565
What are you doing, man?

1542
01:09:02,862 --> 01:09:04,322
Here you go, Larry.

1543
01:09:04,363 --> 01:09:06,657
You see what happens?

1544
01:09:06,699 --> 01:09:09,535
You see what happens,
Larry?

1545
01:09:11,579 --> 01:09:12,955
This is what happens

1546
01:09:12,997 --> 01:09:14,874
when you fuck a stranger
in the ass, Larry!

1547
01:09:43,694 --> 01:09:45,154
What the fuck
are you doing, man?!

1548
01:09:46,072 --> 01:09:48,324
I just bought
that fucking car last week!

1549
01:09:49,367 --> 01:09:50,743
I'm gonna
fuckin' kill you!

1550
01:09:50,785 --> 01:09:53,621
I just bought
the fucking car last week!

1551
01:09:53,663 --> 01:09:56,040
I'll kill your
fucking car, man!

1552
01:09:56,082 --> 01:09:58,042
That's not his-

1553
01:09:58,084 --> 01:09:59,418
God damn it!

1554
01:10:02,380 --> 01:10:03,756
You like that?

1555
01:10:05,299 --> 01:10:10,763
I kill your fucking car!

1556
01:10:30,282 --> 01:10:31,617
I accept your apology.

1557
01:10:31,659 --> 01:10:34,537
No. I just

1558
01:10:34,578 --> 01:10:37,456
Want to handle it
by myself from now on.

1559
01:10:39,375 --> 01:10:42,628
That has nothing
to do with it.

1560
01:10:42,670 --> 01:10:44,547
Yes, the car made it home.

1561
01:10:44,588 --> 01:10:46,924
You're calling me at home.

1562
01:10:46,966 --> 01:10:48,426
No, Walter,

1563
01:10:48,467 --> 01:10:50,845
it did not look like...

1564
01:10:50,886 --> 01:10:53,222
Larry was about to crack.

1565
01:10:53,264 --> 01:10:56,183
Well,
that's your perception.

1566
01:10:57,059 --> 01:10:59,937
You know, Walter,
you're right.

1567
01:10:59,979 --> 01:11:02,356
There is
an unspoken message here.

1568
01:11:02,398 --> 01:11:03,357
It's fuck you!

1569
01:11:03,399 --> 01:11:05,359
Leave me the fuck alone!

1570
01:11:07,194 --> 01:11:10,197
Yeah, I'll be at practice.

1571
01:11:26,881 --> 01:11:27,840
Pin your diapers on,
Lebowski.

1572
01:11:27,882 --> 01:11:29,717
Jackie Treehorn
wants to see you.

1573
01:11:29,759 --> 01:11:33,137
Jackie Treehorn knows
which Lebowski you are.

1574
01:11:33,179 --> 01:11:35,431
Jackie Treehorn wants to see
the deadbeat Lebowski.

1575
01:11:35,473 --> 01:11:38,059
You're not dealing
with morons here.

1576
01:12:24,563 --> 01:12:25,940
Thanks for coming.

1577
01:12:25,982 --> 01:12:27,858
I'm Jackie Treehorn.

1578
01:12:29,777 --> 01:12:33,155
This is quite a pad
you got here, man.

1579
01:12:33,197 --> 01:12:35,032
Completely unspoiled.

1580
01:12:35,074 --> 01:12:37,034
What's your drink, Dude?

1581
01:12:37,076 --> 01:12:38,953
White Russian.
Thanks.

1582
01:12:41,163 --> 01:12:43,249
How's the smut business,
Jackie?

1583
01:12:43,290 --> 01:12:45,126
I wouldn't know,
Dude.

1584
01:12:45,167 --> 01:12:47,128
I deal in publishing,

1585
01:12:47,169 --> 01:12:48,045
entertainment,

1586
01:12:48,087 --> 01:12:50,131
political advocacy.

1587
01:12:50,172 --> 01:12:51,549
Which one's Logjamming?

1588
01:12:51,590 --> 01:12:53,426
Yes, regrettably,
it's true.

1589
01:12:53,467 --> 01:12:56,220
Standards have fallen
in adult entertainment.

1590
01:12:56,262 --> 01:12:57,638
It's video, Dude.

1591
01:12:57,680 --> 01:13:00,141
Now that we're competing
with those amateurs,

1592
01:13:00,182 --> 01:13:03,936
We can't afford to invest
in little extras, like story,

1593
01:13:03,978 --> 01:13:05,855
production value,

1594
01:13:05,896 --> 01:13:08,232
feelings.

1595
01:13:08,274 --> 01:13:10,651
You know, people forget

1596
01:13:10,693 --> 01:13:15,031
that the brain is
the biggest erogenous zone.

1597
01:13:15,072 --> 01:13:16,449
On you maybe.

1598
01:13:16,490 --> 01:13:18,326
Of course, you have to take
the good with the bad.

1599
01:13:18,367 --> 01:13:21,120
New technology permits us
to do very exciting things

1600
01:13:21,162 --> 01:13:23,539
In interactive
erotic software.

1601
01:13:23,581 --> 01:13:25,041
Wave of the future,
Dude.

1602
01:13:25,082 --> 01:13:28,336
100% electronic.

1603
01:13:29,879 --> 01:13:32,381
I still jerk off
manually.

1604
01:13:33,674 --> 01:13:34,634
Of course you do.

1605
01:13:34,675 --> 01:13:36,052
I can see you're anxious

1606
01:13:36,093 --> 01:13:37,553
for me to get to the point.

1607
01:13:37,595 --> 01:13:39,930
Well, here it is, Dude.

1608
01:13:39,972 --> 01:13:41,849
Where's Bunny?

1609
01:13:41,891 --> 01:13:43,726
Well, I thought you
might know that, man.

1610
01:13:43,768 --> 01:13:45,227
Why would I?

1611
01:13:45,269 --> 01:13:46,646
She only ran off

1612
01:13:46,687 --> 01:13:48,939
to get away from that
rather sizable debt to me.

1613
01:13:48,981 --> 01:13:51,317
No. She didn't run off.
She's been, um-

1614
01:13:51,359 --> 01:13:53,235
I've heard that kidnapping
story, so save it.

1615
01:13:53,277 --> 01:13:56,155
I know you're mixed up
in all this, Dude,

1616
01:13:56,197 --> 01:13:59,533
And I don't care what you're
trying to get from the husband.

1617
01:13:59,575 --> 01:14:00,951
That's your business.

1618
01:14:00,993 --> 01:14:03,454
All I'm saying is...

1619
01:14:03,496 --> 01:14:04,955
I want mine.

1620
01:14:04,997 --> 01:14:06,332
Yeah, right, man.

1621
01:14:06,374 --> 01:14:08,334
I mean, there are
a lot of,

1622
01:14:08,376 --> 01:14:12,296
Facets to this, a lot
of interested parties.

1623
01:14:13,172 --> 01:14:14,590
Excuse me.

1624
01:14:21,180 --> 01:14:22,640
Oh, yeah.

1625
01:14:22,682 --> 01:14:23,599
Where's that?

1626
01:14:26,978 --> 01:14:28,396
All right.

1627
01:14:32,274 --> 01:14:33,192
Excuse me.

1628
01:15:07,268 --> 01:15:08,644
Forgive me.

1629
01:15:08,686 --> 01:15:11,022
No problemo, man.

1630
01:15:12,481 --> 01:15:16,736
If I can find your money...

1631
01:15:16,777 --> 01:15:19,655
What's in it
for The Dude?

1632
01:15:19,697 --> 01:15:21,157
Well, of course,
there's that to discuss.

1633
01:15:21,198 --> 01:15:22,742
Refill?

1634
01:15:22,783 --> 01:15:24,243
Yeah. The pope
shit in the woods?

1635
01:15:24,285 --> 01:15:25,619
10% finder's fee.

1636
01:15:25,661 --> 01:15:26,620
That all right?

1637
01:15:27,580 --> 01:15:28,539
Done, Jackie.

1638
01:15:28,581 --> 01:15:31,917
Yeah. I dig the way
you do business, man.

1639
01:15:31,959 --> 01:15:33,336
Your money
is being held

1640
01:15:33,377 --> 01:15:35,629
By a kid named
Larry Sellers.

1641
01:15:35,671 --> 01:15:37,048
He lives
in north Hollywood,

1642
01:15:37,089 --> 01:15:38,549
On Radford...

1643
01:15:38,591 --> 01:15:41,552
By the
in-n-out burger.

1644
01:15:41,594 --> 01:15:44,430
A fuckin' brat,
but I'm sure your goons

1645
01:15:44,472 --> 01:15:48,225
Can get it off him.
I mean, he's 15.

1646
01:15:48,267 --> 01:15:51,270
Flunking social studies.

1647
01:15:54,565 --> 01:15:56,942
So, if you could just...

1648
01:15:56,984 --> 01:16:00,738
Write me a check for my
10% of half a million...

1649
01:16:00,780 --> 01:16:03,032
5 grand...

1650
01:16:03,074 --> 01:16:04,492
I'll go out and mingle-

1651
01:16:08,371 --> 01:16:11,290
You mix a hell
of a Caucasian, Jackie.

1652
01:16:12,291 --> 01:16:14,627
A 15-year-old kid.

1653
01:16:14,669 --> 01:16:18,422
Is this
some sort of a joke?

1654
01:16:18,464 --> 01:16:19,924
No, no joke.

1655
01:16:19,965 --> 01:16:23,719
No funny stuff, Jackie.
the kid's got it.

1656
01:16:23,761 --> 01:16:25,262
Hi, fellas.

1657
01:16:27,682 --> 01:16:29,684
The kid just wanted
a car.

1658
01:16:32,395 --> 01:16:36,148
All The Dude ever wanted
was his rug back.

1659
01:16:36,190 --> 01:16:37,692
I'm not greedy.

1660
01:16:38,567 --> 01:16:41,946
It would really...

1661
01:16:41,988 --> 01:16:43,489
Tie the room together.

1662
01:16:45,783 --> 01:16:48,619
Darkness washed over The Dude.

1663
01:16:48,661 --> 01:16:51,539
Darker than
a black steer's took us

1664
01:16:51,580 --> 01:16:54,417
On a moonless prairie night.

1665
01:16:54,458 --> 01:16:57,878
There was no bottom.

1666
01:17:13,477 --> 01:17:16,981
# What condition
my condition was in #

1667
01:17:18,774 --> 01:17:21,652
# I woke up this morning
with the sun down #

1668
01:17:21,694 --> 01:17:24,196
# Shinin' in him #

1669
01:17:26,365 --> 01:17:31,120
# I found my mind
in a brown paper bag #

1670
01:17:31,162 --> 01:17:32,163
# But then #

1671
01:17:34,582 --> 01:17:38,336
# I tripped on a cloud
and fell 8 miles high #

1672
01:17:38,377 --> 01:17:42,340
# I tore my mind
on a jagged sky #

1673
01:17:42,381 --> 01:17:44,717
# I just dropped in #

1674
01:17:44,759 --> 01:17:49,055
# To see what condition
my condition was in #

1675
01:17:49,096 --> 01:17:51,349
# Yeah, yeah, oh, yeah #

1676
01:17:51,390 --> 01:17:54,268
# What condition
my condition was in #

1677
01:18:00,566 --> 01:18:04,236
# I pushed my soul
in a deep dark hole #

1678
01:18:04,278 --> 01:18:06,781
# And then
I followed it in #

1679
01:18:08,699 --> 01:18:11,535
# I watched myself
crawlin' out #

1680
01:18:11,577 --> 01:18:15,956
# As I was crawlin' in #

1681
01:18:15,998 --> 01:18:17,750
# I got up so tight #

1682
01:18:17,792 --> 01:18:20,127
# I couldn't unwind #

1683
01:18:20,169 --> 01:18:22,046
# I saw so much #

1684
01:18:22,088 --> 01:18:24,423
# I broke my mind #

1685
01:18:24,465 --> 01:18:26,342
# I just dropped in #

1686
01:18:26,384 --> 01:18:30,388
# To see what condition
my condition was in #

1687
01:18:41,399 --> 01:18:44,860
# What condition
my condition was in #

1688
01:18:49,865 --> 01:18:53,327
# Someone
painted echoes on #

1689
01:18:53,369 --> 01:18:54,245
# In big black letters #

1690
01:18:54,286 --> 01:18:56,163
# On the dead inside #

1691
01:18:58,165 --> 01:19:00,042
# I kept my foot
on the gas #

1692
01:19:00,084 --> 01:19:01,919
# As I left the road #

1693
01:19:01,961 --> 01:19:05,256
# Blew out my mind #

1694
01:19:05,297 --> 01:19:09,552
# 8 miles out of Memphis,
and I got no spare #

1695
01:19:09,593 --> 01:19:13,848
# 8 miles straightened up
downtown somewhere #

1696
01:19:13,889 --> 01:19:15,850
# I just dropped in #

1697
01:19:15,891 --> 01:19:20,271
# To see what condition
my condition was in #

1698
01:19:21,689 --> 01:19:24,025
# I said,
I just dropped in #

1699
01:19:24,066 --> 01:19:28,321
# To see what condition
my condition was in #

1700
01:20:33,094 --> 01:20:36,931
But the charge was true

1701
01:20:36,973 --> 01:20:41,227
and they say
he ran away

1702
01:20:41,268 --> 01:20:42,269
branded!

1703
01:20:55,366 --> 01:20:58,035
Is this your only I.D.?

1704
01:20:58,077 --> 01:21:00,079
I know my rights,
man.

1705
01:21:01,497 --> 01:21:04,333
You don't know shit,
Lebowski.

1706
01:21:04,375 --> 01:21:06,252
I want
a fucking lawyer, man.

1707
01:21:06,293 --> 01:21:08,129
I want...

1708
01:21:08,170 --> 01:21:10,589
Bill Kunstler, man.

1709
01:21:12,091 --> 01:21:13,426
Or Ron Coobie.

1710
01:21:13,467 --> 01:21:14,927
Mr. Treehorn tells us

1711
01:21:14,969 --> 01:21:18,222
that he had to eject you
from his garden party,

1712
01:21:18,264 --> 01:21:21,142
that you were drunk
and abusive.

1713
01:21:21,183 --> 01:21:26,355
Mr. Treehorn treats objects
like women, man.

1714
01:21:26,397 --> 01:21:28,733
Mr. Treehorn draws
a lot of water in this town.

1715
01:21:28,774 --> 01:21:31,152
You don't draw shit,
Lebowski.

1716
01:21:31,193 --> 01:21:34,530
Now we got a nice quiet
little beach community here,

1717
01:21:34,572 --> 01:21:36,449
and I aim to keep it
nice and quiet.

1718
01:21:36,490 --> 01:21:39,327
So let me
make something plain.

1719
01:21:39,368 --> 01:21:41,245
I don't like you
sucking around,

1720
01:21:41,287 --> 01:21:43,622
bothering our citizens,
Lebowski.

1721
01:21:43,664 --> 01:21:46,042
I don't like
your jerk-off name,

1722
01:21:46,083 --> 01:21:48,044
I don't like
your jerk-off face,

1723
01:21:48,085 --> 01:21:49,420
I don't like
your jerk-off behavior,

1724
01:21:49,462 --> 01:21:51,255
And I don't like you...

1725
01:21:51,297 --> 01:21:52,798
Jerk-off.

1726
01:21:55,259 --> 01:21:58,179
Do I make myself clear?

1727
01:22:00,097 --> 01:22:03,392
I'm sorry.
I wasn't listening.

1728
01:22:05,394 --> 01:22:06,729
Fucking fascist!

1729
01:22:08,272 --> 01:22:10,149
Stay out of Malibu,
Lebowski!

1730
01:22:11,192 --> 01:22:13,944
Stay out of Malibu,
deadbeat!

1731
01:22:13,986 --> 01:22:16,322
Keep your ugly fucking
gold-bricking ass

1732
01:22:16,364 --> 01:22:19,158
out of
my beach community.

1733
01:22:19,200 --> 01:22:25,331
# I want to sleep with you
in the desert tonight #

1734
01:22:25,373 --> 01:22:30,252
# With a billion stars
all around #

1735
01:22:31,671 --> 01:22:34,048
Man, could you
change the channel?

1736
01:22:34,090 --> 01:22:36,050
Fuck you, man!
if you don't like my music,

1737
01:22:36,092 --> 01:22:36,926
get your own fucking cab!

1738
01:22:36,968 --> 01:22:38,427
I had a really rough-

1739
01:22:38,469 --> 01:22:40,346
I'll pull over
and kiss your ass out.

1740
01:22:40,388 --> 01:22:42,223
Man, come on,
I had a rough night,

1741
01:22:42,264 --> 01:22:45,768
And I hate
the fucking eagles, man.

1742
01:22:51,774 --> 01:22:53,234
Out of my fucking cab!

1743
01:23:14,380 --> 01:23:16,257
# Devil-may-care #

1744
01:23:16,298 --> 01:23:19,552
# And I'm the devil
with love to spare #

1745
01:23:19,593 --> 01:23:24,056
# So viva, Las Vegas #

1746
01:23:24,098 --> 01:23:27,476
# Viva, Las Vegas #

1747
01:23:40,281 --> 01:23:41,699
Jesus.

1748
01:24:00,092 --> 01:24:01,552
Jeffrey.

1749
01:24:01,594 --> 01:24:03,929
Maude?

1750
01:24:03,971 --> 01:24:05,389
Love me.

1751
01:24:06,766 --> 01:24:09,143
That's my robe.

1752
01:24:09,185 --> 01:24:12,855
Tell me about
yourself, Jeffrey.

1753
01:24:12,897 --> 01:24:15,149
Well, not much
to tell.

1754
01:24:15,191 --> 01:24:20,029
I was one
of the authors

1755
01:24:20,071 --> 01:24:22,948
of the port Huron
Statement.

1756
01:24:22,990 --> 01:24:24,825
The original
Port Huron Statement.

1757
01:24:25,785 --> 01:24:29,789
Not the compromised
second draft.

1758
01:24:31,165 --> 01:24:33,918
And then I,

1759
01:24:33,959 --> 01:24:35,336
you ever hear
of the Seattle 7?

1760
01:24:36,379 --> 01:24:39,256
That was me.

1761
01:24:39,298 --> 01:24:43,552
And, um,
the 6 other guys.

1762
01:24:43,594 --> 01:24:47,431
And then
a music business briefly.

1763
01:24:48,391 --> 01:24:50,726
Yeah, a roadie
for Metallica.

1764
01:24:51,769 --> 01:24:53,646
Speed of sound tour.

1765
01:24:55,564 --> 01:24:58,025
Bunch of assholes.

1766
01:24:58,067 --> 01:24:59,819
And then,
you know,

1767
01:24:59,860 --> 01:25:02,738
A little of this,
a little of that.

1768
01:25:02,780 --> 01:25:06,033
My career's slowed down
a little lately.

1769
01:25:06,075 --> 01:25:09,954
What do you do
for recreation?

1770
01:25:09,996 --> 01:25:15,251
Oh, the usual.
Bowl, drive around.

1771
01:25:15,292 --> 01:25:18,295
The occasional
acid flashback.

1772
01:25:23,884 --> 01:25:26,137
What happened
to your house?

1773
01:25:26,178 --> 01:25:28,139
Oh, Jackie Treehorn
trashed the place.

1774
01:25:28,180 --> 01:25:30,933
He thought I had
your father's money.

1775
01:25:30,975 --> 01:25:33,936
He got me out of the way
while he looked for it.

1776
01:25:33,978 --> 01:25:34,937
Cocktail?

1777
01:25:34,979 --> 01:25:36,355
No, thanks.

1778
01:25:36,397 --> 01:25:37,857
It's not my
father's money.

1779
01:25:37,898 --> 01:25:39,734
It's the
Foundation's.

1780
01:25:39,775 --> 01:25:41,652
Why did he think
you have it?

1781
01:25:41,694 --> 01:25:43,154
And who does?

1782
01:25:43,195 --> 01:25:45,948
Oh, Larry Sellers,
this high school kid.

1783
01:25:45,990 --> 01:25:47,325
Real fucking brat.

1784
01:25:47,366 --> 01:25:50,745
You know, this is a very
complicated case, Maude.

1785
01:25:50,786 --> 01:25:53,539
Lotta ins, lotta outs.

1786
01:25:53,581 --> 01:25:54,457
You know, fortunately,

1787
01:25:54,498 --> 01:25:56,834
I'm adhering to a pretty strict,

1788
01:25:56,876 --> 01:25:59,253
drug regiment to keep
my mind, you know,

1789
01:25:59,295 --> 01:26:01,255
Limber, you know.

1790
01:26:01,297 --> 01:26:03,758
Very fucking close
to your father's money.

1791
01:26:03,799 --> 01:26:06,135
I keep telling you it's
the Foundation's money.

1792
01:26:06,177 --> 01:26:07,595
Father doesn't have any.

1793
01:26:09,472 --> 01:26:11,349
What are you talking about?
he's fucking loaded.

1794
01:26:11,390 --> 01:26:14,226
No, no, the wealth
was all mother's.

1795
01:26:14,268 --> 01:26:16,228
No, he runs stuff-

1796
01:26:16,270 --> 01:26:18,648
We did let him run one
of the companies briefly,

1797
01:26:18,689 --> 01:26:19,940
But he didn't do
very well at it.

1798
01:26:19,982 --> 01:26:21,442
No, he's, you know.

1799
01:26:21,484 --> 01:26:22,818
No, he helps administer
the charities now,

1800
01:26:22,860 --> 01:26:26,238
and I give him
a reasonable allowance.

1801
01:26:26,280 --> 01:26:27,657
He has no money
of his own.

1802
01:26:27,698 --> 01:26:29,533
I know how he likes
to present himself.

1803
01:26:29,575 --> 01:26:31,535
Father's weakness
is vanity.

1804
01:26:31,577 --> 01:26:32,453
Hence, the slut.

1805
01:26:32,495 --> 01:26:37,750
Do you think he,

1806
01:26:37,792 --> 01:26:39,126
What is that, yoga?

1807
01:26:39,168 --> 01:26:41,587
It increases the chances
of conception.

1808
01:26:44,465 --> 01:26:45,424
Increases?

1809
01:26:45,466 --> 01:26:46,717
Well, yes.

1810
01:26:46,759 --> 01:26:48,219
What did you think
this was all about?

1811
01:26:48,260 --> 01:26:49,136
Fun and games?

1812
01:26:49,178 --> 01:26:52,056
I want a child.

1813
01:26:52,098 --> 01:26:54,433
Ok, yeah, ok,
but let me-

1814
01:26:54,475 --> 01:26:56,435
Ahem, let me explain
something about The Dude.

1815
01:26:56,477 --> 01:26:58,354
Look, Jeffrey,

1816
01:26:58,396 --> 01:26:59,855
I don't want
a partner.

1817
01:26:59,897 --> 01:27:01,857
In fact, I don't
want the father

1818
01:27:01,899 --> 01:27:03,734
to be someone
I have to see socially

1819
01:27:03,776 --> 01:27:05,152
or who'll have
any interest

1820
01:27:05,194 --> 01:27:06,654
in raising
the child himself.

1821
01:27:06,696 --> 01:27:10,324
So that doctor-

1822
01:27:10,366 --> 01:27:15,538
Exactly. Now, what
happened to your face?

1823
01:27:15,579 --> 01:27:17,456
Did Jackie Treehorn
Do that as well?

1824
01:27:17,498 --> 01:27:21,335
No it was the chief
of police of Malibu.

1825
01:27:21,377 --> 01:27:22,837
A real reactionary.

1826
01:27:22,878 --> 01:27:26,757
So, your father...

1827
01:27:26,799 --> 01:27:28,634
Oh, yeah, I get it.

1828
01:27:28,676 --> 01:27:29,635
What?

1829
01:27:29,677 --> 01:27:32,054
Oh, man, my thinking
about this case

1830
01:27:32,096 --> 01:27:36,392
had become very uptight.
Yeah, your father.

1831
01:27:37,685 --> 01:27:40,271
Jeffrey, what are
you talking about?

1832
01:27:42,982 --> 01:27:44,442
Walter, if you're there,

1833
01:27:44,483 --> 01:27:48,237
pick up the fucking phone,
man, come on, Walter.

1834
01:27:48,279 --> 01:27:50,156
Pick it up, man,
this is an emergency.

1835
01:27:50,197 --> 01:27:51,157
Come on, enough-Dude?

1836
01:27:51,198 --> 01:27:53,534
Yeah, listen, Walter,
I'm at my place.

1837
01:27:53,576 --> 01:27:54,952
I need you to come
pick me up.

1838
01:27:54,994 --> 01:27:56,454
I can't drive, Dude,
It's Erev Shabbos.

1839
01:27:56,495 --> 01:27:59,832
What?
Erev Shabbos.

1840
01:27:59,874 --> 01:28:02,251
I can't drive.
Man!

1841
01:28:02,293 --> 01:28:03,127
I'm not even supposed
to pick up the phone

1842
01:28:03,169 --> 01:28:04,628
unless it's
an emergency.

1843
01:28:04,670 --> 01:28:06,922
This is
a fucking emergency.

1844
01:28:06,964 --> 01:28:09,342
I understand. That's why
I picked up the phone.

1845
01:28:09,383 --> 01:28:10,718
Walter, you fuck,

1846
01:28:10,760 --> 01:28:12,637
we gotta go
to Pasadena, man.

1847
01:28:12,678 --> 01:28:15,389
Come pick me up or I'm off
the fucking bowling team.

1848
01:28:30,196 --> 01:28:32,865
Get out of that
fucking car, man.

1849
01:28:42,166 --> 01:28:43,542
Who the fuck
are you, man?

1850
01:28:43,584 --> 01:28:46,420
Easy, man.
Relax, man.

1851
01:28:46,462 --> 01:28:48,339
No physical harm
intended.

1852
01:28:48,381 --> 01:28:49,340
Who the fuck
are you?

1853
01:28:49,382 --> 01:28:50,758
Why are you
following me around?

1854
01:28:50,800 --> 01:28:52,218
Come on, fuckhead.

1855
01:28:52,259 --> 01:28:54,637
Relax, man.
I'm a brother Seamus.

1856
01:28:54,679 --> 01:28:56,097
Brother Seamus?

1857
01:28:58,099 --> 01:28:59,433
Like an Irish monk?

1858
01:28:59,475 --> 01:29:01,227
What the fuck are you
talking about?

1859
01:29:01,268 --> 01:29:02,728
My name is Da Fino.

1860
01:29:02,770 --> 01:29:05,648
I'm a private snoop,
like you, man.

1861
01:29:05,690 --> 01:29:07,441
What?

1862
01:29:07,483 --> 01:29:08,317
A dick, man.

1863
01:29:08,359 --> 01:29:11,821
And let me tell you
something. I dig your work.

1864
01:29:11,862 --> 01:29:13,322
Playing one side
against the other.

1865
01:29:13,364 --> 01:29:15,741
In bed with everybody.
Fabulous stuff, man.

1866
01:29:15,783 --> 01:29:17,618
I'm not-fuck it, man.

1867
01:29:17,660 --> 01:29:20,037
Just stay away from
my fucking lady friend.

1868
01:29:20,079 --> 01:29:22,456
I'm not messing
with your special lady.

1869
01:29:22,498 --> 01:29:23,833
She's not
my special lady.

1870
01:29:23,874 --> 01:29:24,834
She's my fucking
lady friend.

1871
01:29:24,875 --> 01:29:26,752
I'm just helping
her conceive, man.

1872
01:29:26,794 --> 01:29:27,628
Hey, man, I'm not-

1873
01:29:27,670 --> 01:29:28,546
Who are you
working for?

1874
01:29:28,587 --> 01:29:30,047
Lebowski?

1875
01:29:30,089 --> 01:29:32,091
Jackie Treehorn?

1876
01:29:32,967 --> 01:29:34,343
The Knutsens.

1877
01:29:34,385 --> 01:29:38,639
The-who the fuck
are the Knutsens?

1878
01:29:38,681 --> 01:29:42,476
The Knutsen's. It's
a wandering daughter job.

1879
01:29:43,477 --> 01:29:45,855
Bunny Lebowski, man.

1880
01:29:45,896 --> 01:29:48,649
Her real name
is Fawn Knutsen.

1881
01:29:48,691 --> 01:29:51,152
Her parents want her back.

1882
01:29:51,193 --> 01:29:53,446
Jesus fucking Christ.

1883
01:29:53,487 --> 01:29:56,240
Crazy? Ran away
about a year ago.

1884
01:29:56,282 --> 01:29:58,617
The Knutsens told me
I should show her this

1885
01:29:58,659 --> 01:29:59,618
when I found her.

1886
01:29:59,660 --> 01:30:01,120
It's the family farm.

1887
01:30:01,162 --> 01:30:03,539
It's outside of
Moorhead, Minnesota.

1888
01:30:03,581 --> 01:30:04,957
They think it'll
make her homesick.

1889
01:30:04,999 --> 01:30:06,834
Oh, boy.
How are you gonna

1890
01:30:06,876 --> 01:30:07,835
keep 'em
down on the farm

1891
01:30:07,877 --> 01:30:10,838
once they've seen
Karl Hungus?

1892
01:30:10,880 --> 01:30:12,256
She's been
kidnapped, Da Fino.

1893
01:30:13,299 --> 01:30:14,133
Oh, I don't know.
maybe not,

1894
01:30:14,175 --> 01:30:16,135
But she's definitely
not around.

1895
01:30:16,177 --> 01:30:20,181
Hey, maybe you and me
could pool our resources.

1896
01:30:20,389 --> 01:30:24,143
Trade information.
Professional courtesy.

1897
01:30:24,185 --> 01:30:25,645
Compeers, you know
what I mean?

1898
01:30:25,686 --> 01:30:28,022
Yeah, yeah, I get it.
Fuck off, Da Fino.

1899
01:30:28,064 --> 01:30:29,940
And stay away
from my special-

1900
01:30:29,982 --> 01:30:33,486
From my fucking
lady friend, man.

1901
01:30:35,279 --> 01:30:37,698
Ze lingonberry
pancakes.

1902
01:30:41,577 --> 01:30:43,496
Lingonberry pancakes.

1903
01:30:46,791 --> 01:30:49,669
Sree pigs in blanket.

1904
01:30:54,382 --> 01:30:56,384
She has lingonberry
pancakes.

1905
01:31:04,475 --> 01:31:06,936
I mean we totally
fucked it up, man.

1906
01:31:06,978 --> 01:31:07,853
We fucked up his payoff,

1907
01:31:07,895 --> 01:31:10,231
we got the kidnappers
all pissed off,

1908
01:31:10,272 --> 01:31:12,149
And Lebowski, you know,
he yelled at me a lot,

1909
01:31:12,191 --> 01:31:14,026
But he didn't
do anything?

1910
01:31:14,068 --> 01:31:15,945
Well, sometimes
it's a cathartic-

1911
01:31:15,987 --> 01:31:18,823
No, no, I'm saying if
he knows I'm a fuck-up,

1912
01:31:18,864 --> 01:31:19,740
why does he
leave me in charge

1913
01:31:19,782 --> 01:31:21,242
Of getting his wife back?

1914
01:31:21,283 --> 01:31:24,537
Because he doesn't fucking
want her back, man.

1915
01:31:24,578 --> 01:31:26,539
He's had enough.
He no longer digs her.

1916
01:31:26,580 --> 01:31:27,957
It's all a show.

1917
01:31:27,999 --> 01:31:30,334
Ok, but then, why
doesn't he give a shit

1918
01:31:30,376 --> 01:31:31,836
About his million bucks?

1919
01:31:31,877 --> 01:31:34,630
I mean, he knows we never
handed off his briefcase,

1920
01:31:34,672 --> 01:31:37,133
but he never asked
for it back.

1921
01:31:37,174 --> 01:31:40,428
The million bucks was
never in the briefcase.

1922
01:31:40,469 --> 01:31:43,556
The briefcase was
fucking empty, man.

1923
01:31:43,597 --> 01:31:46,434
The asshole was hoping
that they would kill her.

1924
01:31:46,475 --> 01:31:48,853
You threw out a ringer
for a ringer.

1925
01:31:48,894 --> 01:31:50,229
Ok, but how does
this all add up

1926
01:31:50,271 --> 01:31:52,231
To an emergency?

1927
01:31:52,273 --> 01:31:54,942
I'm saying I see what
you're getting at, Dude,

1928
01:31:54,984 --> 01:31:56,444
He kept the money.

1929
01:31:56,485 --> 01:31:57,820
My point is,

1930
01:31:57,862 --> 01:32:00,239
here we are,
it's Shabbos,

1931
01:32:00,281 --> 01:32:02,241
the Sabbath, which
I'm allowed to break

1932
01:32:02,283 --> 01:32:05,036
only if it's a matter
of life or death.

1933
01:32:05,077 --> 01:32:06,537
Will you come off it,
Walter?

1934
01:32:06,579 --> 01:32:07,830
You're not even
fucking Jewish, man.

1935
01:32:07,872 --> 01:32:10,249
What the fuck are
you talking about?

1936
01:32:10,291 --> 01:32:11,751
You're fucking
Polish-catholic.

1937
01:32:11,792 --> 01:32:13,252
What the fuck are
you talking about?

1938
01:32:13,294 --> 01:32:14,754
I converted when
I married Cynthia.

1939
01:32:14,795 --> 01:32:16,130
Come on, Dude.

1940
01:32:16,172 --> 01:32:17,631
You know this.

1941
01:32:17,673 --> 01:32:19,550
And 5 fucking years ago,
you were divorced.

1942
01:32:19,592 --> 01:32:20,926
So what are saying?
When you get divorced,

1943
01:32:20,968 --> 01:32:22,428
You turn in
your library card?

1944
01:32:22,470 --> 01:32:24,847
You get a new license?
You stop being Jewish?

1945
01:32:24,889 --> 01:32:26,223
This is the driveway?

1946
01:32:26,265 --> 01:32:27,725
I'm Jewish as
fucking Tevye.

1947
01:32:27,767 --> 01:32:30,144
Man, you know,
it's all a part

1948
01:32:30,186 --> 01:32:32,647
of your sick
Cynthia thing.

1949
01:32:32,688 --> 01:32:34,440
Man, taking care
of her fucking dog.

1950
01:32:34,482 --> 01:32:36,317
Going to her
fucking synagogue.

1951
01:32:36,359 --> 01:32:38,235
You're living in
the fucking past.

1952
01:32:38,277 --> 01:32:39,737
3,000 years of
beautiful tradition

1953
01:32:39,779 --> 01:32:41,656
from Moses
to Sandy Koufax,

1954
01:32:41,697 --> 01:32:42,657
you're goddamn right

1955
01:32:42,698 --> 01:32:44,533
I'm living in
the fucking past!

1956
01:32:44,575 --> 01:32:46,827
I- Jesus.

1957
01:32:46,869 --> 01:32:50,331
What the hell
happened?

1958
01:32:50,373 --> 01:32:58,673
# Viva Las Vegas #

1959
01:33:08,265 --> 01:33:09,725
Where was she, man?

1960
01:33:09,767 --> 01:33:11,143
Visiting friends of hers
in palm springs.

1961
01:33:11,185 --> 01:33:12,645
She just picked up
and left.

1962
01:33:12,687 --> 01:33:14,021
Never bothered
to tell us.

1963
01:33:14,063 --> 01:33:16,440
Well, I guess the fucking
nihilist knew where she was.

1964
01:33:16,482 --> 01:33:18,818
Jesus, Dude, she never
even kidnapped herself.

1965
01:33:18,859 --> 01:33:20,319
Who is this gentleman,
Dude?

1966
01:33:20,361 --> 01:33:22,238
Who am I? I'm
a fucking veteran.

1967
01:33:22,279 --> 01:33:24,156
He shouldn't go
in there, Dude.

1968
01:33:24,198 --> 01:33:25,574
He's very angry.

1969
01:33:28,077 --> 01:33:28,828
Hello, man.

1970
01:33:28,869 --> 01:33:33,249
So, she's back,
no thanks to you.

1971
01:33:33,290 --> 01:33:35,126
Where's the fucking
money, Lebowski?

1972
01:33:35,167 --> 01:33:37,044
A million bucks
from fucking needy

1973
01:33:37,086 --> 01:33:38,546
Little urban
achievers!

1974
01:33:38,587 --> 01:33:39,922
You are scum, man!

1975
01:33:39,964 --> 01:33:41,340
Who the hell is he?

1976
01:33:41,382 --> 01:33:42,341
Who am I? Who am I?

1977
01:33:42,383 --> 01:33:43,342
I'm the guy
that's gonna kick

1978
01:33:43,384 --> 01:33:45,219
Your phony goldbricking
ass! That's who I am.

1979
01:33:45,261 --> 01:33:47,138
Man, we know the briefcase
was fucking empty.

1980
01:33:47,179 --> 01:33:49,056
We know you kept the million
bucks for yourself.

1981
01:33:49,098 --> 01:33:50,558
You have your story,
I have mine.

1982
01:33:50,599 --> 01:33:52,935
I say I entrusted
the money to you,

1983
01:33:52,977 --> 01:33:53,853
And you stole it.

1984
01:33:53,894 --> 01:33:55,730
As if we would ever
dream of taking

1985
01:33:55,771 --> 01:33:57,148
your bullshit
money!

1986
01:33:57,189 --> 01:33:59,525
You thought that Bunny
had been kidnapped,

1987
01:33:59,567 --> 01:34:01,027
and you were
fucking glad, man.

1988
01:34:01,068 --> 01:34:03,029
You could use it as an excuse
to make some money disappear.

1989
01:34:03,070 --> 01:34:04,947
All you needed was a sap
to pin it on.

1990
01:34:04,989 --> 01:34:09,243
You just met me.
You-human paraquat!

1991
01:34:09,285 --> 01:34:11,537
You figured, oh,
here's a loser, you know.

1992
01:34:11,579 --> 01:34:13,956
A deadbeat.
somebody the square community

1993
01:34:13,998 --> 01:34:14,957
Won't give a shit about.

1994
01:34:14,999 --> 01:34:17,084
Well, aren't you?

1995
01:34:17,877 --> 01:34:20,755
Well, yeah, but-

1996
01:34:20,796 --> 01:34:22,048
Get out, both of you.

1997
01:34:22,089 --> 01:34:23,049
Look at that
fucking phony, Dude.

1998
01:34:23,090 --> 01:34:24,925
Pretending to be a
fucking millionaire.

1999
01:34:24,967 --> 01:34:27,345
Out of this house now,
you bums!

2000
01:34:27,386 --> 01:34:28,846
Let me tell you
something else.

2001
01:34:28,888 --> 01:34:31,223
I've seen a lot of
spinals, Dude,

2002
01:34:31,265 --> 01:34:33,142
And this guy's
a fake.

2003
01:34:33,184 --> 01:34:34,518
A fucking
goldbricker.

2004
01:34:34,560 --> 01:34:36,020
Stay away from me,
mister!

2005
01:34:36,062 --> 01:34:37,938
This guy
fucking walks.

2006
01:34:37,980 --> 01:34:39,023
I've never been
more certain

2007
01:34:39,065 --> 01:34:40,441
of anything
in my life.

2008
01:34:40,483 --> 01:34:41,317
You stay away from me!

2009
01:34:41,359 --> 01:34:43,819
Walter, for Christ's sake,
man, he's a cripple.

2010
01:34:43,861 --> 01:34:45,237
Come on, come on.

2011
01:34:45,279 --> 01:34:46,238
Get away from me!

2012
01:34:48,199 --> 01:34:49,033
Put him down, man!

2013
01:34:49,075 --> 01:34:50,451
Yeah, I'll put
him down, Dude!

2014
01:34:50,493 --> 01:34:55,581
Rauss! Achtung, baby!

2015
01:35:09,261 --> 01:35:11,681
Come on, man, help me
put him back in his chair.

2016
01:35:30,783 --> 01:35:33,119
Sure, you'll see
some tank battles.

2017
01:35:33,160 --> 01:35:35,037
But fighting in desert
is very different

2018
01:35:35,079 --> 01:35:37,456
from fighting
in canopy jungle.

2019
01:35:37,498 --> 01:35:39,417
I mean 'nam was
a foot soldier's war.

2020
01:35:39,458 --> 01:35:42,628
Whereas, this thing
should you know,

2021
01:35:42,670 --> 01:35:44,130
should be
a piece of cake.

2022
01:35:44,171 --> 01:35:45,548
I mean, I had
an M16, Jacko.

2023
01:35:45,589 --> 01:35:47,425
Not an Abrams
fucking tank.

2024
01:35:47,466 --> 01:35:49,927
Me and Charlie,
eyeball to eyeball.

2025
01:35:50,886 --> 01:35:53,347
That's fuckin' combat.

2026
01:35:53,389 --> 01:35:55,725
The man in the
black pajamas, Dude.

2027
01:35:55,766 --> 01:35:57,643
Worthy fuckin'
adversary.

2028
01:35:57,685 --> 01:35:58,644
Who's in
pajamas, Walter?

2029
01:35:58,686 --> 01:36:01,022
Shut the fuck up,
Donny.

2030
01:36:01,063 --> 01:36:03,441
Whereas, what we
have here...

2031
01:36:03,482 --> 01:36:05,318
Lots of fig-eaters wearing
towels on their heads,

2032
01:36:05,359 --> 01:36:07,320
trying to find reverse
on a soviet tank.

2033
01:36:07,361 --> 01:36:09,155
This-this is not
a worthy-

2034
01:36:10,197 --> 01:36:12,450
What's this
day of rest shit?

2035
01:36:12,491 --> 01:36:14,327
What's this bullshit!

2036
01:36:14,368 --> 01:36:15,745
I don't fuckin' care!

2037
01:36:15,786 --> 01:36:17,246
It don't matter
to Jesus.

2038
01:36:17,288 --> 01:36:18,748
But you not
fooling me, man.

2039
01:36:18,789 --> 01:36:21,125
You might fool the fucks
in the league office,

2040
01:36:21,167 --> 01:36:23,544
but you don't
fool Jesus.

2041
01:36:23,586 --> 01:36:26,422
It's bush league
psyche-out stuff.

2042
01:36:26,464 --> 01:36:28,841
Laughable, man.

2043
01:36:28,883 --> 01:36:32,720
I would have fucked you
in the ass Saturday.

2044
01:36:32,762 --> 01:36:35,931
I'll fuck you in the ass
Next Wednesday instead.

2045
01:36:35,973 --> 01:36:39,477
You got a date
Wednesday, baby.

2046
01:36:43,689 --> 01:36:45,524
He's cracking.

2047
01:36:45,566 --> 01:36:46,525
The whole concept of Asia.

2048
01:36:46,567 --> 01:36:48,944
I mean, many learned men
have disputed this,

2049
01:36:48,986 --> 01:36:54,283
but in the 14th century.
the rabahm, he-

2050
01:37:01,666 --> 01:37:03,417
Well, they
finally did it.

2051
01:37:03,459 --> 01:37:05,920
They killed
my fucking car.

2052
01:37:05,961 --> 01:37:09,256
We want some money,
Lebowski.

2053
01:37:09,298 --> 01:37:11,634
Ja, otherwise,
we kill the girl.

2054
01:37:11,676 --> 01:37:13,552
Ja, it seems
you have forgotten

2055
01:37:13,594 --> 01:37:15,137
Our little deal,
Lebowski.

2056
01:37:15,179 --> 01:37:18,057
You don't have the
fucking girl, dipshit.

2057
01:37:18,099 --> 01:37:20,434
We know you never did.

2058
01:37:20,476 --> 01:37:21,852
Are these the Nazis,
Walter?

2059
01:37:21,894 --> 01:37:23,354
No, Donny, these men
are nihilists.

2060
01:37:23,396 --> 01:37:24,772
There's nothing
to be afraid of.

2061
01:37:26,691 --> 01:37:29,527
Vee don't care. Vee
still want the money,

2062
01:37:29,568 --> 01:37:31,737
Lebowski, or
we'll fuck you up.

2063
01:37:31,779 --> 01:37:34,657
Fuck you.
Fuck the 3 of yous.

2064
01:37:34,699 --> 01:37:38,035
No, without a hostage,
there is no ransom.

2065
01:37:38,077 --> 01:37:39,453
That's what ransom is.

2066
01:37:39,495 --> 01:37:41,455
Those are the fucking rules.

2067
01:37:41,497 --> 01:37:43,457
His girlfriend
gave up her toe.

2068
01:37:43,499 --> 01:37:45,835
She zought we'd be
getting $1 million.

2069
01:37:45,876 --> 01:37:47,253
It's not fair.

2070
01:37:47,294 --> 01:37:50,631
Fair? Who's the fucking
nihilist around here?

2071
01:37:50,673 --> 01:37:52,049
You bunch of
fucking crybabies.

2072
01:37:52,091 --> 01:37:54,427
Cool it, Walter.
Hey, look, pal,

2073
01:37:54,468 --> 01:37:56,429
There never was
any money.

2074
01:37:56,470 --> 01:37:58,222
The big Lebowski gave
me an empty briefcase,

2075
01:37:58,264 --> 01:38:00,641
So take it up
with him, man.

2076
01:38:00,683 --> 01:38:03,019
Yeah, and I would like
my undies back.

2077
01:38:03,060 --> 01:38:04,020
Are these guys gonna
hurt us, Walter?

2078
01:38:04,061 --> 01:38:06,439
No, Donny, these
men are cowards.

2079
01:38:06,480 --> 01:38:09,734
Ok, so we take ze
money you haf on you

2080
01:38:09,775 --> 01:38:11,694
And we calls it
even.

2081
01:38:13,696 --> 01:38:15,031
Hey, no, come on,
Walter, come on.

2082
01:38:15,072 --> 01:38:16,949
We're ending this
thing cheap, man.

2083
01:38:16,991 --> 01:38:17,950
No, what's mine is mine.

2084
01:38:17,992 --> 01:38:18,951
Oh, come on, Walter.

2085
01:38:18,993 --> 01:38:20,328
No funny stuff.

2086
01:38:20,369 --> 01:38:23,247
All right,
all right, I got,

2087
01:38:23,289 --> 01:38:26,042
4 bucks, almost 5.

2088
01:38:26,083 --> 01:38:26,917
I got $18.

2089
01:38:26,959 --> 01:38:28,919
What's
mine is mine.

2090
01:38:28,961 --> 01:38:31,839
We fuck you up, man.
We takes the money.

2091
01:38:31,881 --> 01:38:33,382
Come and get it.

2092
01:38:34,675 --> 01:38:37,053
We fuck you up.

2093
01:38:37,094 --> 01:38:39,055
Show me what
you got, nihilist.

2094
01:38:39,096 --> 01:38:40,431
I fuck you.

2095
01:38:40,473 --> 01:38:41,432
Walter, come on,
he's got a sword.

2096
01:38:41,474 --> 01:38:43,851
Fucking dipshit with
a 9-toed woman.

2097
01:38:53,986 --> 01:38:54,820
Take it easy, man.

2098
01:38:54,862 --> 01:38:56,280
Here's the $4.00.

2099
01:39:01,160 --> 01:39:04,080
I got a fucking ball, man.

2100
01:39:09,377 --> 01:39:10,753
Anti-semite!

2101
01:39:25,059 --> 01:39:26,978
We got a man down, Dude.

2102
01:39:30,398 --> 01:39:32,358
God, they shot him,
man.

2103
01:39:32,400 --> 01:39:33,234
No, Dude.

2104
01:39:33,275 --> 01:39:34,235
They shot Donny?

2105
01:39:34,276 --> 01:39:35,152
There weren't
any shots fired.

2106
01:39:35,194 --> 01:39:37,154
It's a heart attack.

2107
01:39:37,196 --> 01:39:39,532
Call the medics, Dude.

2108
01:39:39,573 --> 01:39:42,451
I'd go myself, but I'm
pumping blood. Might pass out.

2109
01:39:42,493 --> 01:39:46,122
Rest easy, good buddy,
you're doing fine.

2110
01:39:46,163 --> 01:39:48,165
We got help
choppering in.

2111
01:40:14,483 --> 01:40:17,320
Hello, gentlemen.
You are the bereaved?

2112
01:40:17,361 --> 01:40:18,738
Yeah, man.

2113
01:40:18,779 --> 01:40:21,157
Francis Donnelly.
Pleased to meet you.

2114
01:40:21,198 --> 01:40:22,658
Jeff Lebowski.

2115
01:40:22,700 --> 01:40:24,035
Walter Sobchak.

2116
01:40:24,076 --> 01:40:26,954
The Dude, actually, is,

2117
01:40:26,996 --> 01:40:27,955
Excuse me?

2118
01:40:27,997 --> 01:40:29,332
Nothing.

2119
01:40:29,373 --> 01:40:35,129
Yes, I understand you're
taking away the remains.

2120
01:40:37,089 --> 01:40:39,842
We have the urn.

2121
01:40:39,884 --> 01:40:42,887
I assume this is
credit card.

2122
01:40:58,694 --> 01:40:59,528
What's this?

2123
01:40:59,570 --> 01:41:02,448
That's for the urn.

2124
01:41:02,490 --> 01:41:04,742
Don't need it. We're
Scattering the ashes.

2125
01:41:04,784 --> 01:41:07,828
Yes, so we
Were informed.

2126
01:41:07,870 --> 01:41:08,746
However, we must,
Of course,

2127
01:41:08,788 --> 01:41:12,667
Transmit the remains
To you in a receptacle.

2128
01:41:14,085 --> 01:41:16,045
This is $180.

2129
01:41:16,087 --> 01:41:19,840
It is our most modestly
priced receptacle.

2130
01:41:19,882 --> 01:41:22,218
Can we just, $180?

2131
01:41:22,259 --> 01:41:24,136
They range up to 3,000.

2132
01:41:24,178 --> 01:41:26,138
We're...

2133
01:41:26,180 --> 01:41:28,057
Can't we just
rent it from you?

2134
01:41:28,099 --> 01:41:30,935
Sir, this is a mortuary,
not a rental house.

2135
01:41:30,977 --> 01:41:32,645
We're scattering
the fucking ashes!

2136
01:41:32,687 --> 01:41:34,146
Look, just because
we're bereaved,

2137
01:41:34,188 --> 01:41:35,147
Doesn't
make us saps!

2138
01:41:35,189 --> 01:41:38,025
Sir, please,
lower your voices.

2139
01:41:38,067 --> 01:41:39,443
Man, don't you have,
you know,

2140
01:41:39,485 --> 01:41:43,322
Something else we could
put him in, you know?

2141
01:41:43,364 --> 01:41:46,242
That is our most modestly
priced receptacle.

2142
01:41:46,283 --> 01:41:47,284
God damn it!

2143
01:41:50,079 --> 01:41:52,081
Is there a Ralph's
around here?

2144
01:42:17,481 --> 01:42:18,858
Donny was
a good bowler

2145
01:42:18,899 --> 01:42:21,235
And a good man.

2146
01:42:21,277 --> 01:42:23,154
He was one of us.

2147
01:42:23,195 --> 01:42:26,824
He was a man who loved
the outdoors and bowling.

2148
01:42:26,866 --> 01:42:28,826
And as a surfer,
he explored the beaches

2149
01:42:28,868 --> 01:42:30,745
of Southern California,

2150
01:42:30,786 --> 01:42:33,748
from La Jolla
to Leo Carrillo

2151
01:42:33,789 --> 01:42:36,625
and up to Pismo.

2152
01:42:36,667 --> 01:42:41,422
He died-he died as so
many men of his generation,

2153
01:42:41,464 --> 01:42:42,840
Before his time.

2154
01:42:42,882 --> 01:42:46,218
In your wisdom, Lord,
you took him.

2155
01:42:46,260 --> 01:42:49,639
As you took so many bright,
flowering young men

2156
01:42:49,680 --> 01:42:51,932
at Khe Sanh, at Lan Doc,

2157
01:42:51,974 --> 01:42:55,227
and Hill 364.

2158
01:42:55,269 --> 01:42:57,647
These young men
gave their lives.

2159
01:42:57,688 --> 01:43:01,525
So did Donny.

2160
01:43:01,567 --> 01:43:03,486
Donny who loved bowling.

2161
01:43:06,364 --> 01:43:12,119
And so, Theodore
Donald Karabatsos,

2162
01:43:12,161 --> 01:43:14,955
in accordance with
what we think

2163
01:43:14,997 --> 01:43:18,334
your dying wishes
might well have been,

2164
01:43:18,376 --> 01:43:22,129
We commit your final
mortal remains

2165
01:43:22,171 --> 01:43:25,925
To the bosom
of the pacific ocean,

2166
01:43:25,966 --> 01:43:27,969
which you loved so well.

2167
01:43:29,887 --> 01:43:31,889
Good night, sweet prince.

2168
01:43:49,573 --> 01:43:50,992
Oh, shit, Dude,
I'm sorry.

2169
01:43:53,369 --> 01:43:54,328
God damn wind.

2170
01:43:56,288 --> 01:43:57,748
You fucking asshole!

2171
01:43:57,790 --> 01:43:58,624
Dude, I'm sorry.

2172
01:43:58,666 --> 01:44:00,543
Everything's a fucking
travesty with you, man.

2173
01:44:00,584 --> 01:44:02,545
I'm sorry.
It was an accident.

2174
01:44:02,586 --> 01:44:04,422
What was that shit
About Vietnam?

2175
01:44:04,463 --> 01:44:06,340
What the fuck
does anything

2176
01:44:06,382 --> 01:44:07,842
have to do
with Vietnam?

2177
01:44:07,883 --> 01:44:09,218
What the fuck are
you talking about?

2178
01:44:09,260 --> 01:44:10,678
Dude, I'm sorry.

2179
01:44:24,567 --> 01:44:29,071
Come on, Dude.
Hey, fuck it, man.

2180
01:44:32,283 --> 01:44:33,784
Let's go bowling.

2181
01:44:56,182 --> 01:45:00,019
And when you're
sitting there

2182
01:45:00,061 --> 01:45:04,357
in your silk
upholstered chair

2183
01:45:04,398 --> 01:45:09,362
talkin' to some rich folks
that you know

2184
01:45:11,489 --> 01:45:15,451
well, I hope
you don't see me

2185
01:45:15,493 --> 01:45:19,246
in my ragged company

2186
01:45:19,288 --> 01:45:24,669
That you know
I could never be alone

2187
01:45:26,170 --> 01:45:28,047
2 oat sodas, Gary.

2188
01:45:28,089 --> 01:45:28,923
Good luck tomorrow.

2189
01:45:28,964 --> 01:45:30,424
Yeah, thanks, man.

2190
01:45:30,466 --> 01:45:32,343
I'm sorry to hear
about Donny.

2191
01:45:32,385 --> 01:45:35,638
Oh, well, yeah,
you know,

2192
01:45:35,680 --> 01:45:37,056
Sometimes you
eat the bar,

2193
01:45:37,098 --> 01:45:39,934
And sometimes,
you know-

2194
01:45:43,396 --> 01:45:45,231
I wondered if I'd
see you again.

2195
01:45:45,272 --> 01:45:47,149
I wouldn't
miss the semis?

2196
01:45:47,191 --> 01:45:48,651
How have things
been going?

2197
01:45:48,693 --> 01:45:50,528
Oh, you know,
strikes and gutters,

2198
01:45:50,569 --> 01:45:51,946
ups and downs.

2199
01:45:51,988 --> 01:45:53,447
Sure. I gotcha.

2200
01:45:53,489 --> 01:45:56,742
Yeah. Thanks, Gary.

2201
01:45:56,784 --> 01:45:59,245
Well, take care, man.
Gotta get back.

2202
01:45:59,286 --> 01:46:01,038
Sure. Take it
easy, Dude.

2203
01:46:01,998 --> 01:46:04,333
I know that you will.

2204
01:46:04,375 --> 01:46:08,379
Yeah, well,
The Dude abides.

2205
01:46:14,176 --> 01:46:17,096
The Dude abides.

2206
01:46:19,765 --> 01:46:24,145
I don't know about you,
but I take comfort in that.

2207
01:46:24,186 --> 01:46:27,857
It's good knowing he's
out there, The Dude.

2208
01:46:27,898 --> 01:46:31,235
Takin' her easy
for all us sinners.

2209
01:46:31,277 --> 01:46:36,532
I sure hope
he makes the finals.

2210
01:46:36,574 --> 01:46:38,451
Well, that about does her.

2211
01:46:38,492 --> 01:46:41,329
Wraps her all up.

2212
01:46:41,370 --> 01:46:43,247
Things seemed to have
worked out pretty good

2213
01:46:43,289 --> 01:46:45,624
for The Dude and Walter.

2214
01:46:45,666 --> 01:46:47,626
And it was
a pretty good story,

2215
01:46:47,668 --> 01:46:49,628
Don't you think?

2216
01:46:49,670 --> 01:46:52,423
Made me laugh
to beat the band.

2217
01:46:52,465 --> 01:46:55,217
Parts, anyway.

2218
01:46:55,259 --> 01:46:58,638
I didn't like
seeing Donny go.

2219
01:46:58,679 --> 01:47:00,056
But then
I happen to know

2220
01:47:00,097 --> 01:47:04,852
That there's a little
Lebowski on the way.

2221
01:47:04,894 --> 01:47:07,355
I guess that's how the
whole darn human comedy

2222
01:47:07,396 --> 01:47:11,150
keeps perpetuating itself

2223
01:47:11,192 --> 01:47:13,527
down through
the generations.

2224
01:47:13,569 --> 01:47:15,029
westward in the wagons,

2225
01:47:15,071 --> 01:47:18,824
and across the sands
of time until we-

2226
01:47:18,866 --> 01:47:20,117
Look at me.

2227
01:47:20,159 --> 01:47:23,037
I'm ramblin' again.

2228
01:47:23,079 --> 01:47:25,956
Well, I hope you folks
enjoyed yourselves.

2229
01:47:25,998 --> 01:47:29,335
Catch ya later
on down the trail.

2230
01:47:29,377 --> 01:47:31,253
Say, friend,
you got any more

2231
01:47:31,295 --> 01:47:33,297
of that good
Sarsaparilla?