1 00:00:16,480 --> 00:00:22,157 # See them tumbling down 2 00:00:22,240 --> 00:00:26,119 # Pledging their love to the ground # 3 00:00:26,200 --> 00:00:29,510 [Man with Western drawl] Out west there was this fella, 4 00:00:29,600 --> 00:00:31,636 fella I want to tell you about, 5 00:00:31,720 --> 00:00:34,792 fella by the name of Jeff Lebowski - 6 00:00:34,880 --> 00:00:38,156 at least that's the handle his parents gave him. 7 00:00:38,240 --> 00:00:41,550 But he never had much use for it himself. 8 00:00:41,640 --> 00:00:45,349 This Lebowski, he called himself the Dude. 9 00:00:45,440 --> 00:00:49,672 Now, Dude, that's a name no one would self-apply 10 00:00:49,760 --> 00:00:51,591 where I come from. 11 00:00:51,680 --> 00:00:56,276 There was a lot about the Dude that didn't make sense to me, 12 00:00:56,360 --> 00:00:59,477 and a lot about where he lived, likewise. 13 00:01:01,080 --> 00:01:02,911 But then again, 14 00:01:03,000 --> 00:01:06,834 maybe that's why I found the place so darn interesting. 15 00:01:10,040 --> 00:01:14,352 They call Los Angeles the City of Angels. 16 00:01:14,440 --> 00:01:17,477 I didn't find it to be that exactly. 17 00:01:17,560 --> 00:01:20,677 But there are some nice folks there. 18 00:01:20,760 --> 00:01:23,991 'Course I can't say I seen London, 19 00:01:24,080 --> 00:01:26,389 and I never been to France, 20 00:01:26,480 --> 00:01:30,234 and I ain't never seen no queen in her damned undies. 21 00:01:30,320 --> 00:01:33,198 But I'll tell you what, 22 00:01:33,280 --> 00:01:35,350 after seeing Los Angeles 23 00:01:35,440 --> 00:01:38,193 and this story I'm about to unfold, 24 00:01:38,280 --> 00:01:42,592 well, I guess I seen somethin' every bit as stupefyin' 25 00:01:42,680 --> 00:01:45,353 as you'd see in any other places, 26 00:01:45,440 --> 00:01:47,556 and in English, too. 27 00:01:47,640 --> 00:01:50,359 So I can die with a smile on my face 28 00:01:50,440 --> 00:01:53,512 without feeling like the good Lord gypped me. 29 00:01:53,600 --> 00:01:56,160 Now, this story I'm about to unfold 30 00:01:56,240 --> 00:01:58,310 took place back in the early 90s, 31 00:01:58,400 --> 00:02:03,110 about the time of our conflict with Saddam and the Iraqis. 32 00:02:03,200 --> 00:02:06,476 I only mention it 'cause sometimes there's a man - 33 00:02:06,560 --> 00:02:10,519 I won't say a hero, 'cause what's a hero? 34 00:02:10,600 --> 00:02:13,398 But sometimes there's a man - 35 00:02:13,480 --> 00:02:16,358 and I'm talking about the Dude here - 36 00:02:16,440 --> 00:02:18,874 sometimes there's a man... 37 00:02:18,960 --> 00:02:23,511 Well, he's the man for his time and place. 38 00:02:23,600 --> 00:02:25,670 He fits right in there, 39 00:02:25,760 --> 00:02:28,274 and that's the Dude, 40 00:02:28,360 --> 00:02:30,237 in Los Angeles. 41 00:02:30,320 --> 00:02:33,039 And even if he's a lazy man, 42 00:02:33,120 --> 00:02:35,953 and the Dude was most certainly that, 43 00:02:36,040 --> 00:02:39,476 quite possibly the laziest in Los Angeles county, 44 00:02:39,560 --> 00:02:41,391 which would place him high 45 00:02:41,480 --> 00:02:44,472 in the running for laziest worldwide. 46 00:02:44,560 --> 00:02:46,790 But sometimes there's a man, 47 00:02:46,880 --> 00:02:48,757 sometimes... 48 00:02:48,840 --> 00:02:50,831 there's a man... 49 00:02:50,920 --> 00:02:54,708 Wow, lost my train of thought here. 50 00:02:54,800 --> 00:02:57,792 But... ah, hell. 51 00:02:57,880 --> 00:02:59,632 I done introduced him enough. 52 00:02:59,720 --> 00:03:02,757 [George Bush] 'This will not stand. 53 00:03:02,840 --> 00:03:06,515 'This will not stand, this aggression against Kuwait.' 54 00:03:06,600 --> 00:03:12,311 # Here on the range I belong 55 00:03:12,400 --> 00:03:17,599 # Drifting along with the tumbling 56 00:03:17,680 --> 00:03:22,470 # Tumbleweed # 57 00:03:28,320 --> 00:03:30,356 Aaaah! 58 00:03:35,280 --> 00:03:37,191 Where's the money, Lebowski? 59 00:03:38,840 --> 00:03:42,389 I want that money, Lebowski. Bunny says you're good for it. 60 00:03:42,480 --> 00:03:44,994 Where's the money, Lebowski? 61 00:03:45,080 --> 00:03:47,196 Where's the money, Lebowski? 62 00:03:47,280 --> 00:03:49,475 Where's the fucking money, shithead? 63 00:03:49,560 --> 00:03:51,073 < It's, uh, ohh, uh... 64 00:03:51,160 --> 00:03:54,835 it's down there somewhere. Let me take another look. 65 00:03:54,920 --> 00:03:57,718 Don't fuck with us! 66 00:03:59,160 --> 00:04:01,993 Your wife owes money to Jackie Treehorn. 67 00:04:02,080 --> 00:04:04,992 That means YOU owe money to Jackie Treehorn. 68 00:04:05,080 --> 00:04:07,799 Ever thus to deadbeats, Lebowski. 69 00:04:07,880 --> 00:04:09,279 Don't do that... 70 00:04:11,560 --> 00:04:13,551 - Not on the rug, man. - See? 71 00:04:13,640 --> 00:04:16,632 See what happens, Lebowski? You see what happens? 72 00:04:16,720 --> 00:04:19,632 Nobody calls me Lebowski. You got the wrong guy. 73 00:04:19,720 --> 00:04:21,358 I'm the Dude, man. 74 00:04:21,440 --> 00:04:25,433 Your name's Lebowski, Lebowski. Your wife is Bunny. 75 00:04:26,440 --> 00:04:29,000 My... my wife... my wife, Bunny? 76 00:04:29,080 --> 00:04:31,150 Do you see a wedding ring? 77 00:04:31,240 --> 00:04:33,435 Does this place look like I'm married? 78 00:04:33,520 --> 00:04:35,795 The toilet seat's up, man. 79 00:04:42,880 --> 00:04:44,791 What the fuck is this? 80 00:04:44,880 --> 00:04:47,917 Obviously, you're not a golfer. 81 00:04:49,760 --> 00:04:51,876 - Woo? - Yeah? 82 00:04:51,960 --> 00:04:55,270 Isn't this guy supposed to be a millionaire? 83 00:04:55,360 --> 00:04:57,032 [Woo] Fuck! 84 00:04:57,920 --> 00:05:01,754 - Yeah, what do you think? - He looks like a fucking loser. 85 00:05:01,840 --> 00:05:04,593 Hey, at least I'm housebroken. 86 00:05:04,680 --> 00:05:08,434 Fucking time wasted. Thanks a lot, asshole. 87 00:05:14,800 --> 00:05:17,997 # La la la la la la la la la 88 00:05:18,080 --> 00:05:21,834 # La la la la la la la la la 89 00:05:21,920 --> 00:05:24,070 # La la la la la la la la la 90 00:05:24,160 --> 00:05:27,038 # La la la la 91 00:05:28,560 --> 00:05:30,676 # La la la 92 00:05:32,040 --> 00:05:34,918 # La la la la la la la la la 93 00:05:37,800 --> 00:05:40,394 # The man in me will do 94 00:05:40,480 --> 00:05:44,598 # Nearly any task 95 00:05:44,680 --> 00:05:47,592 # And as for compensation 96 00:05:47,680 --> 00:05:50,990 # There's a little he would ask 97 00:05:51,080 --> 00:05:53,674 # Take a woman like you 98 00:05:53,760 --> 00:05:56,228 # To get through 99 00:05:56,320 --> 00:05:58,880 # To the man in me 100 00:06:00,800 --> 00:06:04,315 # The storm clouds are raging 101 00:06:04,400 --> 00:06:07,551 # All around my door 102 00:06:07,640 --> 00:06:09,631 # I think to myself 103 00:06:09,720 --> 00:06:13,190 # I might not take it any more 104 00:06:13,280 --> 00:06:16,875 # Take a woman like your kind 105 00:06:16,960 --> 00:06:20,430 # To find the man in me 106 00:06:23,080 --> 00:06:25,594 # But, oh 107 00:06:25,680 --> 00:06:28,672 # What a wonderful feeling 108 00:06:30,520 --> 00:06:34,513 # Just to know that you are near 109 00:06:36,520 --> 00:06:40,832 # That sets my heart a-reelin' 110 00:06:42,200 --> 00:06:45,078 # From my toes 111 00:06:45,160 --> 00:06:48,914 # Up to my ears 112 00:06:49,000 --> 00:06:52,310 # The man in me will hide sometimes 113 00:06:52,400 --> 00:06:54,914 # To keep from being seen 114 00:06:55,000 --> 00:06:57,150 # But that's just because 115 00:06:57,240 --> 00:07:01,153 # He doesn't want to turn into some machine 116 00:07:01,240 --> 00:07:04,198 # Take a woman like you 117 00:07:04,280 --> 00:07:06,669 # To get through 118 00:07:06,760 --> 00:07:08,637 # To the man in me # 119 00:07:10,440 --> 00:07:12,078 Whoo! 120 00:07:12,720 --> 00:07:16,076 I'm throwing rocks tonight. Mark it, Dude. 121 00:07:16,160 --> 00:07:19,436 [Walter] This was a valued rug. This was a... 122 00:07:19,520 --> 00:07:22,318 It really tied the room together. 123 00:07:22,400 --> 00:07:24,436 So this was a valued... 124 00:07:24,520 --> 00:07:26,158 - What tied the room together? - My rug. 125 00:07:26,240 --> 00:07:28,071 - Were you listening, Donny? - What? 126 00:07:28,160 --> 00:07:30,515 Were you listening to the Dude's story? 127 00:07:30,600 --> 00:07:31,919 I was bowling. 128 00:07:32,000 --> 00:07:35,879 You have no frame of reference, like a child who wanders in... 129 00:07:35,960 --> 00:07:37,712 Walter, what's the point? 130 00:07:37,800 --> 00:07:39,791 There's no reason - here's my point, Dude - 131 00:07:39,880 --> 00:07:42,155 - there's no reason... - Yeah, what's your point? 132 00:07:42,240 --> 00:07:44,435 - Huh? - Walter, what is the point... 133 00:07:44,520 --> 00:07:46,829 We know who is at fault here. 134 00:07:46,920 --> 00:07:48,797 What the fuck are you talking about? 135 00:07:48,880 --> 00:07:51,519 No, what the fuck are you... I'm not... 136 00:07:51,600 --> 00:07:54,512 We're talking about unchecked aggression here. 137 00:07:54,600 --> 00:07:56,272 - What is he talking about? - My rug. 138 00:07:56,360 --> 00:07:58,715 Forget it, you're out of your element. 139 00:07:58,800 --> 00:08:02,475 The Chinaman who peed on my rug, I can't go give him a bill. 140 00:08:02,560 --> 00:08:05,154 So what the fuck are you talking about? 141 00:08:05,240 --> 00:08:07,276 The Chinaman is not the issue here. 142 00:08:07,360 --> 00:08:10,272 I'm talking about drawing a line in the sand. 143 00:08:10,360 --> 00:08:12,555 Across this line, you do not... 144 00:08:12,640 --> 00:08:16,076 Also, Dude, "Chinaman" is not the preferred nomenclature. 145 00:08:16,160 --> 00:08:18,037 "Asian-American," please. 146 00:08:18,120 --> 00:08:21,556 This isn't a guy who built the railroads here... 147 00:08:21,640 --> 00:08:24,029 - What the fuck... - He peed on my rug. 148 00:08:24,120 --> 00:08:27,749 - He peed on the Dude's rug. - You're out of your element! 149 00:08:27,840 --> 00:08:30,593 Dude, the Chinaman is not the issue here. 150 00:08:30,680 --> 00:08:32,875 - So, who... who... - Jeff Lebowski. 151 00:08:32,960 --> 00:08:36,509 The other Jeffrey Lebowski, the millionaire. 152 00:08:36,600 --> 00:08:39,319 That's fucking interesting, man. That's fucking interesting. 153 00:08:39,400 --> 00:08:42,392 < Plus, he has the wealth and the resources... 154 00:08:42,480 --> 00:08:44,948 so there's no reason, no FUCKING reason 155 00:08:45,040 --> 00:08:47,554 why his wife should go out, owe money, 156 00:08:47,640 --> 00:08:50,108 and then they pee on your fucking rug! 157 00:08:50,200 --> 00:08:51,872 - Am I wrong? - No. 158 00:08:51,960 --> 00:08:53,552 - Am I wrong? - But... 159 00:08:53,640 --> 00:08:55,392 < OK, then. Ahem. 160 00:08:55,480 --> 00:08:58,995 That rug really tied the room together, did it not? 161 00:08:59,080 --> 00:09:01,196 - Fuckin' A! - And he peed on it. 162 00:09:01,280 --> 00:09:02,793 Donny, please. 163 00:09:02,880 --> 00:09:05,633 I could find this fucking Lebowski guy. 164 00:09:05,720 --> 00:09:08,757 His name is Lebowski? That's your name, Dude. 165 00:09:08,840 --> 00:09:12,196 He should compensate me for the fucking rug. 166 00:09:12,280 --> 00:09:15,829 His wife owes money, and they pee on MY rug? 167 00:09:15,920 --> 00:09:19,469 - They pee on your fucking rug. - They peed on my fucking rug. 168 00:09:19,560 --> 00:09:21,278 That's right, Dude. 169 00:09:21,360 --> 00:09:24,432 They peed on your fucking rug. 170 00:09:26,080 --> 00:09:29,117 This is the study. The various commendations... 171 00:09:29,200 --> 00:09:31,191 [Dude] Jeffrey Lebowski. 172 00:09:31,280 --> 00:09:34,352 - Honorary degrees, etcetera. - Hmm, very impressive. 173 00:09:34,440 --> 00:09:36,829 Oh, please feel free to inspect them. 174 00:09:36,920 --> 00:09:40,196 - Oh, I'm not really that... - Oh, please, please. 175 00:09:40,280 --> 00:09:42,589 That is the key to the city of Pasadena, 176 00:09:42,680 --> 00:09:46,958 which Mr Lebowski received in recognition of various civic... 177 00:09:47,040 --> 00:09:48,792 Oh, that's the Los Angeles 178 00:09:48,880 --> 00:09:51,553 Chamber of Commerce Business Achiever Award, 179 00:09:51,640 --> 00:09:54,108 which is... not necessarily given every year. 180 00:09:54,200 --> 00:09:57,510 Hey, is this, uh, is this him with Nancy? 181 00:09:57,600 --> 00:10:01,559 Yes, indeed, that is Mr Lebowski with the First Lady... 182 00:10:01,640 --> 00:10:04,108 That's, uh, Lebowski on the left there? 183 00:10:04,200 --> 00:10:06,714 Of course. Mr Lebowski on the left... 184 00:10:06,800 --> 00:10:09,758 He's a cripple... you know, a... handicapped guy? 185 00:10:09,840 --> 00:10:13,150 Mr Lebowski is disabled, yes. This picture was taken 186 00:10:13,240 --> 00:10:16,118 when Mrs Reagan was First Lady of the nation. 187 00:10:16,200 --> 00:10:19,033 - Yes, yes. Not of California. - Pope John. 188 00:10:19,120 --> 00:10:21,509 He met privately with the president, 189 00:10:21,600 --> 00:10:24,114 but there was no time for a photo opportunity. 190 00:10:24,200 --> 00:10:26,316 - Nancy's pretty good. - Wonderful woman! 191 00:10:26,400 --> 00:10:28,152 These are, uh... 192 00:10:28,240 --> 00:10:31,312 Those are Mr Lebowski's children, so to speak. 193 00:10:31,400 --> 00:10:33,436 Different mothers? Racially, pretty cool. 194 00:10:33,520 --> 00:10:35,112 [Laughs] 195 00:10:35,200 --> 00:10:37,714 They're not literally his children. 196 00:10:37,800 --> 00:10:40,030 They're the Little Lebowski Urban Achievers, 197 00:10:40,120 --> 00:10:42,395 inner-city children of promise 198 00:10:42,480 --> 00:10:45,153 but without the means for a higher education. 199 00:10:45,240 --> 00:10:47,959 Mr Lebowski is committed to sending them to college. 200 00:10:48,040 --> 00:10:50,508 Excuse me. Thank you, thank you. 201 00:10:50,600 --> 00:10:53,433 Far out. Think he's got room for one more? 202 00:10:53,520 --> 00:10:55,715 One, uh... Oh! 203 00:10:56,720 --> 00:11:00,030 You never went to college. Please, don't touch that. 204 00:11:00,120 --> 00:11:02,918 Yeah, I did, but I spent most of my time... 205 00:11:03,000 --> 00:11:05,912 occupying various administration buildings, 206 00:11:06,000 --> 00:11:07,911 smoking a lot of Thai stick, 207 00:11:08,000 --> 00:11:10,514 breaking into the R.O.T.C. And bowling. 208 00:11:10,600 --> 00:11:12,909 To tell you the truth, I don't remember much. 209 00:11:13,000 --> 00:11:14,718 < Oh. 210 00:11:15,720 --> 00:11:17,517 Hmm. 211 00:11:18,320 --> 00:11:21,471 OK, sir, you're a Lebowski, I'm a Lebowski, 212 00:11:21,560 --> 00:11:23,391 that's terrific. 213 00:11:23,480 --> 00:11:26,392 But I'm very busy, as I imagine you are. 214 00:11:26,480 --> 00:11:28,755 What can I do for you, sir? 215 00:11:28,840 --> 00:11:32,230 Uh, well, sir, it's, uh, this rug I have, 216 00:11:32,320 --> 00:11:35,073 it really tied the room together... 217 00:11:35,160 --> 00:11:38,835 < You told Brandt, he told me. Where do I fit in? 218 00:11:38,920 --> 00:11:42,037 Well, they were looking for you, these guys. 219 00:11:42,120 --> 00:11:44,076 - Uh... - I'll say it again. 220 00:11:44,160 --> 00:11:47,197 You told Brandt on the phone, he told me. 221 00:11:47,280 --> 00:11:49,032 I know what happened. Yes? 222 00:11:49,120 --> 00:11:52,510 So you know that they were trying to piss on YOUR rug? 223 00:11:52,600 --> 00:11:54,909 Did I urinate on your rug? 224 00:11:55,000 --> 00:11:57,468 Did you personally come and pee on my rug? 225 00:11:57,560 --> 00:12:00,677 Hello! Do you speak English? Parla usted ingl�s? 226 00:12:00,760 --> 00:12:03,672 I'll ask you again. Did I urinate on your rug? 227 00:12:03,760 --> 00:12:06,718 No, like I said, Woo peed on my rug. 228 00:12:06,800 --> 00:12:08,870 < I want to understand this, sir. 229 00:12:08,960 --> 00:12:12,509 Every time a rug is micturated upon in this city, 230 00:12:12,600 --> 00:12:14,158 I have to compensate... 231 00:12:14,240 --> 00:12:17,915 Come on, man, I'm not trying to scam anybody here. 232 00:12:18,000 --> 00:12:19,718 I... I was just... 233 00:12:19,800 --> 00:12:23,110 You're just looking for a handout like every other... 234 00:12:23,200 --> 00:12:25,873 Are you employed, Mr Lebowski? 235 00:12:25,960 --> 00:12:29,430 Uh, wait, let me explain something to you. 236 00:12:29,520 --> 00:12:32,830 I am not Mr Lebowski. You're Mr Lebowski. 237 00:12:32,920 --> 00:12:35,753 I'm the Dude. So that's what you call me, 238 00:12:35,840 --> 00:12:39,116 you know, uh, that or, uh, his Dudeness, 239 00:12:39,200 --> 00:12:42,033 or Duder, or, you know, uh, el Duderino, 240 00:12:42,120 --> 00:12:45,112 if you're not into the whole brevity thing. 241 00:12:45,200 --> 00:12:48,556 - Are you employed, sir? - Employed? 242 00:12:49,880 --> 00:12:53,714 You don't look for a job dressed like that on a weekday? 243 00:12:53,800 --> 00:12:56,712 Is this a... What day is this? 244 00:12:56,800 --> 00:13:00,190 < Well, I DO work, sir. So if you don't mind... 245 00:13:00,280 --> 00:13:02,510 No, I do mind. The Dude minds. 246 00:13:02,600 --> 00:13:04,556 This will not stand, you know. 247 00:13:04,640 --> 00:13:07,632 This aggression will not stand, man. 248 00:13:07,720 --> 00:13:11,508 - I mean, your wife owes... - My wife is not the issue! 249 00:13:11,600 --> 00:13:15,513 I hope that my wife will learn to live on her ample allowance. 250 00:13:15,600 --> 00:13:18,751 If not, that's HER problem, not mine, 251 00:13:18,840 --> 00:13:20,751 just as the rug is your problem, 252 00:13:20,840 --> 00:13:25,152 just as every bum's lot in life is his own responsibility, 253 00:13:25,240 --> 00:13:27,515 regardless of who he chooses to blame. 254 00:13:27,600 --> 00:13:30,592 I didn't blame anyone for the loss of my legs. 255 00:13:30,680 --> 00:13:33,399 Some Chinaman took them from me in Korea. 256 00:13:33,480 --> 00:13:36,472 But I went out and achieved anyway. 257 00:13:36,560 --> 00:13:40,269 I cannot solve your problems, sir, only you can. 258 00:13:41,880 --> 00:13:44,235 - Oh, fuck it. - "Oh, fuck it." 259 00:13:44,320 --> 00:13:46,914 Yes, that's your answer to everything. 260 00:13:47,000 --> 00:13:48,399 < Tattoo it on your forehead. 261 00:13:48,480 --> 00:13:51,631 Your revolution is over, Mr Lebowski! 262 00:13:51,720 --> 00:13:54,234 Condolences! The bums lost! 263 00:13:54,320 --> 00:13:57,835 My advice to you is to do what your parents did! 264 00:13:57,920 --> 00:13:59,638 Get a job, sir! 265 00:13:59,720 --> 00:14:03,713 The bums will always lose! Do you hear me, Lebowski? 266 00:14:03,800 --> 00:14:05,233 The bums... 267 00:14:07,160 --> 00:14:09,435 How was your meeting, Mr Lebowski? 268 00:14:09,520 --> 00:14:13,832 OK. The old man told me to take any rug in the house. 269 00:14:13,920 --> 00:14:17,913 Well, enjoy, and perhaps we'll see you again, Dude. 270 00:14:18,000 --> 00:14:21,754 Sure, if I'm in the neighbourhood, you know, 271 00:14:21,840 --> 00:14:23,637 and, um... 272 00:14:23,720 --> 00:14:25,950 I need to use the john. 273 00:14:35,760 --> 00:14:38,399 - Blow on them. - Huh? 274 00:14:38,480 --> 00:14:40,755 Go ahead, blow. > 275 00:14:40,840 --> 00:14:45,436 You want me to blow on your, uh, toes? 276 00:14:45,520 --> 00:14:48,637 Uh-huh. I can't blow that far. 277 00:14:54,920 --> 00:14:56,797 Are you sure HE won't mind? 278 00:14:56,880 --> 00:15:00,509 He doesn't care about anything. He's a nihilist. 279 00:15:00,600 --> 00:15:03,068 Oh, that must be exhausting. 280 00:15:03,160 --> 00:15:04,878 You're not blowing. 281 00:15:04,960 --> 00:15:07,793 He has to be getting along, Mrs Lebowski. 282 00:15:07,880 --> 00:15:09,950 Oh, you're Bunny. 283 00:15:11,400 --> 00:15:13,550 I'll suck your cock for $1,000. 284 00:15:17,600 --> 00:15:19,192 Wonderful woman. > 285 00:15:19,280 --> 00:15:21,840 We're very fond of her. Very free-spirited. 286 00:15:21,920 --> 00:15:24,480 Brandt can't watch, or he has to pay 100. 287 00:15:25,360 --> 00:15:26,952 That's marvellous. 288 00:15:29,000 --> 00:15:32,629 Uh... I'm just gonna go find a cash machine. 289 00:15:36,160 --> 00:15:38,754 Whoo! Slamming them tonight! 290 00:15:38,840 --> 00:15:40,910 You guys are dead in the water. 291 00:15:41,000 --> 00:15:43,673 [Walter] All right! Way to go, Donny! 292 00:15:43,760 --> 00:15:47,309 If you will it, it is no dream. 293 00:15:47,400 --> 00:15:50,392 You're 20 minutes late, man. What the fuck is that? 294 00:15:50,480 --> 00:15:52,311 - Theodore Herzel. - Huh? 295 00:15:52,400 --> 00:15:56,313 The state of Israel. If you will it, Dude, it is no dream. 296 00:15:56,400 --> 00:15:59,995 The carrier. What's in the fucking carrier? 297 00:16:00,080 --> 00:16:03,516 Hmm? Oh, Cynthia's dog. I think it's a Pomeranian. 298 00:16:03,600 --> 00:16:05,670 I can't leave him, he eats the furniture. 299 00:16:05,760 --> 00:16:08,194 I'm watching it while they're in Hawaii. 300 00:16:08,280 --> 00:16:11,556 - You brought it bowling? - "Brought it bowling"? 301 00:16:11,640 --> 00:16:14,677 I didn't rent it shoes, I'm not buying it a beer, 302 00:16:14,760 --> 00:16:16,796 he's not taking your turn, Dude. 303 00:16:16,880 --> 00:16:20,111 If my ex-wife asked me to take care of her dog 304 00:16:20,200 --> 00:16:22,794 while she and her boyfriend went to Honolulu, 305 00:16:22,880 --> 00:16:24,552 I'd tell her to fuck herself. 306 00:16:24,640 --> 00:16:26,596 Dude, you don't have an ex, 307 00:16:26,680 --> 00:16:29,592 and this is a fucking show dog with fucking papers. 308 00:16:29,680 --> 00:16:34,071 You can't board it. It gets upset. Its hair falls out. 309 00:16:34,160 --> 00:16:36,116 - Over the line! - Huh? 310 00:16:36,200 --> 00:16:39,510 Sorry, you were over the line. That's a foul. 311 00:16:39,600 --> 00:16:41,511 Bullshit. Mark it 8, Dude. 312 00:16:41,600 --> 00:16:44,353 Excuse me, mark it zero. Next frame. 313 00:16:44,440 --> 00:16:46,590 < Bullshit, Walter. Mark it 8, Dude. 314 00:16:46,680 --> 00:16:49,831 This is not 'Nam, this is bowling. There are rules. 315 00:16:49,920 --> 00:16:52,150 Hey, Walter, come on, it's Smokey. 316 00:16:52,240 --> 00:16:55,277 His toe slipped over. It's just a game. 317 00:16:55,360 --> 00:16:58,796 It determines who enters the round-robin. Am I wrong? 318 00:16:58,880 --> 00:17:00,598 - Yeah, but... - Am I wrong? 319 00:17:00,680 --> 00:17:02,557 Yeah, but I wasn't over. 320 00:17:02,640 --> 00:17:05,234 Give me the marker, Dude. I'm marking an 8. 321 00:17:05,320 --> 00:17:08,790 Smokey, my friend, you're entering a world of pain. 322 00:17:08,880 --> 00:17:11,269 - Walter... - You mark that frame an 8, 323 00:17:11,360 --> 00:17:14,158 you're entering a world of pain. 324 00:17:14,240 --> 00:17:16,913 - I'm not... - A world of pain. 325 00:17:17,000 --> 00:17:19,309 Look, Dude, this is your partner. 326 00:17:19,400 --> 00:17:21,118 Has the world gone crazy? 327 00:17:21,200 --> 00:17:23,873 Am I the only one who cares about the rules? 328 00:17:23,960 --> 00:17:25,279 Mark it zero! > 329 00:17:25,360 --> 00:17:28,352 - They're calling the cops. - Mark it zero! 330 00:17:28,440 --> 00:17:31,034 - Put the piece away. - Walter... 331 00:17:31,120 --> 00:17:33,634 You think I'm fucking around? Mark it zero! 332 00:17:40,320 --> 00:17:42,276 All right, it's fucking zero. 333 00:17:42,360 --> 00:17:45,557 < You happy, you crazy fuck? 334 00:17:46,880 --> 00:17:49,155 It's a league game, Smoke. 335 00:17:52,000 --> 00:17:53,069 You can't do that, man. 336 00:17:53,120 --> 00:17:55,554 These guys are like me. They're pacifists. 337 00:17:55,640 --> 00:17:57,596 Smokey was a conscientious objector. 338 00:17:57,680 --> 00:18:00,319 I, myself, dabbled in pacifism, 339 00:18:00,400 --> 00:18:02,391 not in 'Nam, of course. 340 00:18:02,480 --> 00:18:04,948 You know he's got emotional problems. 341 00:18:05,040 --> 00:18:07,270 You mean, beyond pacifism? 342 00:18:07,360 --> 00:18:10,716 He's fragile, very fragile. 343 00:18:10,800 --> 00:18:14,395 Huh... I did not know that. 344 00:18:14,480 --> 00:18:17,517 Well, it's all water under the bridge, 345 00:18:17,600 --> 00:18:20,114 and we do enter the next round-robin. 346 00:18:20,200 --> 00:18:22,589 - Am I wrong? - No, you're not wrong. 347 00:18:22,680 --> 00:18:25,797 - Am I wrong? - No, you're just an asshole! 348 00:18:25,880 --> 00:18:29,350 [Police siren] OK. We play Quintana and O'Brien next week. 349 00:18:29,440 --> 00:18:32,034 < They should be pushovers. 350 00:18:32,120 --> 00:18:34,509 Man, will you just... 351 00:18:34,600 --> 00:18:36,750 Just take it easy, man. 352 00:18:36,840 --> 00:18:39,070 That's your answer for everything, Dude. 353 00:18:39,160 --> 00:18:44,029 Look at our current situation with that camelfucker in Iraq. 354 00:18:44,120 --> 00:18:46,350 < Pacifism is not something to hide behind. 355 00:18:46,440 --> 00:18:48,556 Just take it easy, man. 356 00:18:48,640 --> 00:18:50,517 I'm perfectly calm, Dude. 357 00:18:50,600 --> 00:18:53,956 - Waving the fucking gun around? - Calmer than you are. 358 00:18:54,040 --> 00:18:55,678 Just take it easy! 359 00:18:56,640 --> 00:18:58,596 Calmer than you are. 360 00:19:00,440 --> 00:19:02,351 [Answer-machine beeps] 361 00:19:02,440 --> 00:19:04,476 'Dude, this is Smokey. 362 00:19:04,560 --> 00:19:06,551 'I don't want to be a hard-on about this. 363 00:19:06,640 --> 00:19:08,517 'I know it wasn't your fault, 364 00:19:08,600 --> 00:19:11,876 'but Gilbert and I will submit this to the league 365 00:19:11,960 --> 00:19:14,474 'and ask them to set aside the round, 366 00:19:14,560 --> 00:19:16,516 'maybe forfeit it to us. 367 00:19:16,600 --> 00:19:19,319 'So, like I say, you know, fair warning. 368 00:19:19,400 --> 00:19:21,595 'Tell Walter. I'm sorry.' 369 00:19:21,680 --> 00:19:23,955 [Beep] 370 00:19:24,040 --> 00:19:26,918 'Mr Lebowski, this is Brandt at, uh, 371 00:19:27,000 --> 00:19:29,434 'well, at Mr Lebowski's office. 372 00:19:29,520 --> 00:19:31,750 'Please, call us when it's convenient.' 373 00:19:31,840 --> 00:19:33,717 [Beep] 374 00:19:33,800 --> 00:19:37,236 'This is Bill Selliger of the Southern Cal Bowling League. 375 00:19:37,320 --> 00:19:39,311 'I just got an informal report 376 00:19:39,400 --> 00:19:42,790 'that a member of your team, a Walter Sobchak, 377 00:19:42,880 --> 00:19:45,474 'drew a firearm during play. [Knock on door] 378 00:19:45,560 --> 00:19:49,394 'This contravenes a number of by-laws and article 27... ' 379 00:19:50,600 --> 00:19:52,989 - Dude. - Hey, Monty. 380 00:19:53,080 --> 00:19:57,198 Dude, I... I finally got... the venue I wanted. 381 00:19:57,280 --> 00:20:00,716 I'm performing my dance quintet, you know, my cycle, 382 00:20:00,800 --> 00:20:03,872 at Crane Jackson's Fountain Street Theatre on Tuesday night. 383 00:20:03,960 --> 00:20:08,078 And, well, I'd love it if you came and gave me notes. 384 00:20:08,160 --> 00:20:09,991 I'll be there, man. 385 00:20:10,960 --> 00:20:13,554 Uh... Dude, uh, 386 00:20:13,640 --> 00:20:15,631 tomorrow's already the 10th. 387 00:20:15,720 --> 00:20:17,517 Far out. 388 00:20:20,360 --> 00:20:22,555 Oh. Oh, all right, OK. 389 00:20:22,640 --> 00:20:25,154 Just, uh, slip the rent under my door. 390 00:20:28,160 --> 00:20:29,718 [Bill Selliger] '... serious infraction 391 00:20:29,800 --> 00:20:32,360 'and examine your standing. Thank you.' 392 00:20:32,440 --> 00:20:34,078 [Beep] 393 00:20:34,160 --> 00:20:36,720 'Mr Lebowski, Brandt again. 394 00:20:36,800 --> 00:20:39,872 'Please, call when you get in, and I'll send a limo. 395 00:20:39,960 --> 00:20:43,669 'I hope you're not avoiding this call because of the rug, 396 00:20:43,760 --> 00:20:46,513 'which, I assure you, is not a problem. 397 00:20:46,600 --> 00:20:48,591 'We need your help, and, uh... 398 00:20:48,680 --> 00:20:50,875 'well, we'd like to see you. 399 00:20:50,960 --> 00:20:52,678 'Thank you. It's Brandt.' 400 00:20:52,760 --> 00:20:53,954 [Beep] 401 00:20:54,040 --> 00:20:57,430 We've had terrible news. Mr Lebowski's in seclusion. 402 00:21:01,400 --> 00:21:03,914 Mr Lebowski. 403 00:21:04,680 --> 00:21:07,752 [Mozart's Requiem] 404 00:21:09,040 --> 00:21:11,474 Funny... 405 00:21:12,040 --> 00:21:15,476 I can look back on a life of achievement, 406 00:21:15,560 --> 00:21:17,710 challenges met, 407 00:21:17,800 --> 00:21:19,677 competitors bested, 408 00:21:19,760 --> 00:21:22,399 obstacles overcome. 409 00:21:23,200 --> 00:21:26,875 < I've accomplished more than most men 410 00:21:26,960 --> 00:21:29,428 < and without the use of my legs. 411 00:21:30,440 --> 00:21:31,998 < What... 412 00:21:32,080 --> 00:21:35,516 What makes a man, Mr Lebowski? 413 00:21:36,680 --> 00:21:38,796 - Dude. - Huh? 414 00:21:40,480 --> 00:21:43,153 Uh, I... I don't know, sir. 415 00:21:43,240 --> 00:21:46,277 Is it being prepared to do the right thing? 416 00:21:47,840 --> 00:21:50,070 Whatever the cost? 417 00:21:50,160 --> 00:21:52,879 < Isn't that what makes a man? 418 00:21:52,960 --> 00:21:54,951 Sure, that and a pair of testicles. 419 00:21:56,320 --> 00:21:58,276 You're joking. But... 420 00:21:59,960 --> 00:22:01,996 Perhaps you're right. 421 00:22:02,080 --> 00:22:04,469 You mind if I do a "J"? 422 00:22:05,600 --> 00:22:06,874 [Crying] Bunny... 423 00:22:08,320 --> 00:22:10,311 Excuse me? 424 00:22:10,400 --> 00:22:12,834 < Bunny Lebowski, 425 00:22:12,920 --> 00:22:15,718 < she is the light of my life. 426 00:22:15,800 --> 00:22:18,792 Are you surprised at my tears, sir? 427 00:22:20,440 --> 00:22:22,556 Fuckin' A. 428 00:22:22,640 --> 00:22:25,757 < Strong men also cry. 429 00:22:26,240 --> 00:22:29,789 Strong men also cry. 430 00:22:29,880 --> 00:22:31,916 [Clears throat] > 431 00:22:32,000 --> 00:22:35,072 I received this fax this morning. 432 00:22:37,440 --> 00:22:39,556 As you can see, 433 00:22:39,640 --> 00:22:41,596 it is a ransom note. 434 00:22:41,680 --> 00:22:44,433 [Dude] "We have Bunnie." 435 00:22:44,520 --> 00:22:48,832 < Sent by men who can't achieve on a level field of play. 436 00:22:48,920 --> 00:22:51,514 [Reading to himself] "Gather one million dollars 437 00:22:51,600 --> 00:22:54,512 in unmarked, non-consecutive twenties." 438 00:22:54,600 --> 00:22:57,398 - Weaklings! - "Await instructions." 439 00:22:57,480 --> 00:22:59,198 - Bums! - "No funny stuff." 440 00:22:59,280 --> 00:23:02,636 - Bummer. - Huh? 441 00:23:02,720 --> 00:23:04,597 This is a bummer, man. 442 00:23:04,680 --> 00:23:06,477 That's, uh, that's a bummer. 443 00:23:06,560 --> 00:23:10,155 Brandt will fill you in on the details. 444 00:23:23,640 --> 00:23:26,837 Mr Lebowski will make you a generous offer 445 00:23:26,920 --> 00:23:30,799 to act as courier once we get instructions for the money. 446 00:23:30,880 --> 00:23:32,279 Why me, man? 447 00:23:32,360 --> 00:23:35,318 He believes the culprits might be the people 448 00:23:35,400 --> 00:23:37,789 who, uh... soiled your rug, 449 00:23:37,880 --> 00:23:42,271 and you're in a unique position to confirm or disconfirm this. 450 00:23:42,360 --> 00:23:44,555 He thinks the carpet-pissers did this? 451 00:23:44,640 --> 00:23:47,074 Well, Dude, we just don't know. 452 00:23:50,840 --> 00:23:53,832 [Spanish guitar] 453 00:24:46,000 --> 00:24:48,753 ['Hotel California' in Spanish] 454 00:25:19,360 --> 00:25:21,510 Fucking Quintana. 455 00:25:21,600 --> 00:25:23,909 That creep can roll, man. 456 00:25:24,000 --> 00:25:25,956 Yeah, but he's a pervert, Dude. 457 00:25:26,040 --> 00:25:27,712 Yeah. 458 00:25:27,800 --> 00:25:30,678 No. He's a sex offender with a record. 459 00:25:30,760 --> 00:25:34,196 He did six months for exposing himself to an 8-year-old. 460 00:25:34,280 --> 00:25:37,272 When he moved to Hollywood, he had to go door-to-door 461 00:25:37,360 --> 00:25:39,078 to tell everyone he was a pederast. 462 00:25:39,160 --> 00:25:41,435 [Donny] What's a pederast, Walter? 463 00:25:41,520 --> 00:25:43,875 Shut the fuck up, Donny. 464 00:25:45,880 --> 00:25:49,316 - So... How much they give you? - 20 grand, man. 465 00:25:49,400 --> 00:25:52,995 - And I get to keep the rug. - Just for making a hand-off? 466 00:25:53,080 --> 00:25:55,196 Yeah. They gave Dude a beeper. 467 00:25:55,280 --> 00:25:58,909 - So whenever they call... - What if it's during a game? 468 00:25:59,000 --> 00:26:02,754 - If it's during league play... - What's during league play? 469 00:26:02,840 --> 00:26:05,752 Life doesn't stop and start at your convenience, 470 00:26:05,840 --> 00:26:08,832 - you piece of shit. - What's wrong with Walter? 471 00:26:08,920 --> 00:26:11,480 I figure it's easy money. It's harmless. 472 00:26:11,560 --> 00:26:14,996 - She probably did it herself. - What do you mean, Dude? 473 00:26:15,080 --> 00:26:17,674 Rug pee-ers didn't do this. Look at it. 474 00:26:17,760 --> 00:26:21,548 A young trophy wife marries this guy for his money. 475 00:26:21,640 --> 00:26:23,949 She figures he isn't giving her enough. 476 00:26:24,040 --> 00:26:25,917 You know, she owes money. 477 00:26:26,000 --> 00:26:29,595 - That fuckin'... bitch. - It's all goddamn fake, man. 478 00:26:29,680 --> 00:26:31,750 It's like Lenin said. 479 00:26:31,840 --> 00:26:34,798 You look for the person who will benefit, 480 00:26:34,880 --> 00:26:37,917 - and, uh, uh, you know... - I am the walrus? 481 00:26:38,000 --> 00:26:40,275 You know, you'll, uh, uh... 482 00:26:40,360 --> 00:26:42,316 You know what I'm trying to say. 483 00:26:42,400 --> 00:26:44,709 - I am the walrus. - That fuckin' bitch! 484 00:26:44,800 --> 00:26:47,519 - I am the walrus. - Shut the fuck up, Donny! 485 00:26:47,600 --> 00:26:50,034 V.I. Lenin. Vladimir Ilyich Ulyanov! 486 00:26:50,120 --> 00:26:52,315 What the fuck is he talking about? 487 00:26:52,400 --> 00:26:55,312 Fucking exactly what happened. That makes me sick. 488 00:26:55,400 --> 00:26:57,994 - What do you care, Walter? - Those rich fucks. 489 00:26:58,080 --> 00:26:59,832 This whole fuckin' thing. 490 00:26:59,920 --> 00:27:02,798 I didn't watch my buddies die face-down in the mud 491 00:27:02,880 --> 00:27:05,838 so that this fucking strumpet, this fucking whore... 492 00:27:05,920 --> 00:27:08,275 I don't see any connection with Vietnam. 493 00:27:08,360 --> 00:27:09,793 No literal connection. 494 00:27:09,880 --> 00:27:12,713 Face it, there's NO connection. Your roll. 495 00:27:12,800 --> 00:27:15,519 - But my point is... - Your roll. 496 00:27:15,600 --> 00:27:17,511 < Are you ready to be fucked? 497 00:27:18,440 --> 00:27:21,876 I see you roll your way into the semis. 498 00:27:21,960 --> 00:27:24,520 Dios mio, man. 499 00:27:24,600 --> 00:27:27,558 Liam and me, we're gonna fuck you up. 500 00:27:27,640 --> 00:27:31,838 Yeah? Well... you know, that's just like, uh... 501 00:27:31,920 --> 00:27:33,797 your opinion, man. 502 00:27:34,640 --> 00:27:37,313 Let me tell you something, pendejo, 503 00:27:37,400 --> 00:27:40,312 you pull any crazy shit with us, 504 00:27:40,400 --> 00:27:42,675 you flash a piece out on the lanes, 505 00:27:42,760 --> 00:27:45,718 I'll take it and stick it up your ass 506 00:27:45,800 --> 00:27:48,837 and pull the fuckin' trigger till it goes click. 507 00:27:49,560 --> 00:27:53,348 - Jesus. - You said it, man. 508 00:27:53,440 --> 00:27:56,432 Nobody fucks with the Jesus. 509 00:28:01,120 --> 00:28:03,111 8-year-olds, Dude. 510 00:28:04,760 --> 00:28:07,832 [Bowling game on tape] 511 00:28:24,600 --> 00:28:28,115 # La la la la la la la la la 512 00:28:28,200 --> 00:28:31,829 # La la la la la la la 513 00:28:31,920 --> 00:28:35,151 # La la la la la la la 514 00:28:35,240 --> 00:28:36,912 # La la la la 515 00:28:39,200 --> 00:28:40,792 # La la la 516 00:28:40,880 --> 00:28:45,317 # La la la la la la la la la la 517 00:28:47,040 --> 00:28:50,237 # The man in me will do 518 00:28:50,320 --> 00:28:53,869 # Nearly any task 519 00:28:53,960 --> 00:28:56,679 # And as for compensation 520 00:28:56,760 --> 00:28:59,320 # There's little he will ask # 521 00:28:59,400 --> 00:29:00,879 Aaaah! 522 00:29:00,960 --> 00:29:03,758 # Take a woman like you 523 00:29:03,840 --> 00:29:05,910 # To get through 524 00:29:06,000 --> 00:29:08,036 # To the man in me 525 00:29:10,960 --> 00:29:14,316 # The storm clouds are raging 526 00:29:14,400 --> 00:29:16,994 # All around my door 527 00:29:17,080 --> 00:29:19,389 # I think to myself 528 00:29:19,480 --> 00:29:23,155 # I might not take it any more 529 00:29:23,240 --> 00:29:26,755 # Take a woman like your kind 530 00:29:26,840 --> 00:29:28,910 # To find 531 00:29:29,000 --> 00:29:30,991 # The man in me 532 00:29:33,080 --> 00:29:35,674 # But oh-ohh 533 00:29:35,760 --> 00:29:37,910 # What a wonderful feeling 534 00:29:38,000 --> 00:29:40,958 [Pager beeps] 535 00:29:41,040 --> 00:29:44,237 # Just to know that you are near... # 536 00:29:49,760 --> 00:29:52,399 Ohh, man. 537 00:29:55,520 --> 00:29:57,431 Oooh... 538 00:29:57,960 --> 00:30:00,758 [Pager continues to beep] 539 00:30:02,080 --> 00:30:03,877 [Brandt] They called 80 minutes ago. 540 00:30:03,960 --> 00:30:06,633 Take the money, drive north on the 405. 541 00:30:06,720 --> 00:30:09,757 They will call you with instructions in 40 minutes. 542 00:30:09,840 --> 00:30:13,674 One person only. They were clear on that, or I'd go with you. 543 00:30:13,760 --> 00:30:16,399 - What happened to your jaw? - Oh, nothin'. 544 00:30:17,760 --> 00:30:21,435 Here's the money. And the phone. 545 00:30:21,520 --> 00:30:24,114 Please, Dude, follow their instructions. 546 00:30:24,200 --> 00:30:25,599 All right. 547 00:30:25,680 --> 00:30:29,116 - Her life is in your hands. - Oh, man, don't say that. 548 00:30:29,200 --> 00:30:31,111 Mr Lebowski asked me to repeat that. 549 00:30:31,200 --> 00:30:33,430 - Her life is in your hands. - Shit, man. 550 00:30:33,520 --> 00:30:35,272 Her life is in your hands, Dude. 551 00:30:35,360 --> 00:30:38,193 Report back to us as soon as it's done. 552 00:30:46,640 --> 00:30:48,471 Where the fuck are you goin'? 553 00:30:48,560 --> 00:30:50,437 Take the ringer. I'll drive. 554 00:30:50,520 --> 00:30:53,080 - What? The what? - The ringer. 555 00:30:53,160 --> 00:30:55,037 The ringer, Dude. 556 00:31:02,000 --> 00:31:04,275 - What the... - Have they called? 557 00:31:04,360 --> 00:31:07,352 - What the hell is this? - My dirty undies, Dude. 558 00:31:07,440 --> 00:31:09,908 Laundry. The whites. 559 00:31:10,000 --> 00:31:13,595 I'm sure there's a reason you brought your dirty undies. 560 00:31:13,680 --> 00:31:15,750 The weight. The ringer cannot look empty. 561 00:31:15,840 --> 00:31:17,592 What the fuck are you thinking? 562 00:31:17,680 --> 00:31:19,955 You're right, Dude. I got to thinking, 563 00:31:20,040 --> 00:31:22,759 why should we settle for a measly fuckin' 20 grand... 564 00:31:22,840 --> 00:31:25,559 We? You said you just wanted to come along. 565 00:31:25,640 --> 00:31:27,949 Why should we settle for 20 grand 566 00:31:28,040 --> 00:31:30,600 when we can keep the entire million? Am I wrong? 567 00:31:30,680 --> 00:31:33,399 Yes, you're wrong. This isn't a game, man. 568 00:31:33,480 --> 00:31:35,710 It is a game. You said so yourself. 569 00:31:35,800 --> 00:31:38,394 - She kidnapped herself. - I said I thought... 570 00:31:38,480 --> 00:31:40,789 [Telephone rings] 571 00:31:44,000 --> 00:31:44,989 Dude here. 572 00:31:45,080 --> 00:31:47,116 [Man, German accent] 'Who is this? ' 573 00:31:47,200 --> 00:31:50,670 Dude the bagman. Where do you want us to go? 574 00:31:50,760 --> 00:31:53,513 - 'Us? ' - Shit! 575 00:31:55,480 --> 00:31:58,870 Yeah, you know, me and the driver. 576 00:31:58,960 --> 00:32:02,157 I'm not handling the money, driving the car... 577 00:32:02,240 --> 00:32:05,073 - 'Shut the fuck up! ' - Are you fucking this up? 578 00:32:05,160 --> 00:32:07,151 Who is that? 579 00:32:07,240 --> 00:32:09,708 That is the driver. I told you... 580 00:32:09,800 --> 00:32:11,233 [Dial tone] 581 00:32:11,320 --> 00:32:13,709 - Shit! - What the fuck's goin' on? 582 00:32:13,800 --> 00:32:15,870 - Walter! - What the fuck is goin' on? 583 00:32:15,960 --> 00:32:19,157 He hung up! You fucked it up! You fucked it up! 584 00:32:19,240 --> 00:32:21,959 - Her life was in our hands. - Easy, Dude. 585 00:32:22,040 --> 00:32:24,315 We're screwed now. We don't get shit. 586 00:32:24,400 --> 00:32:27,233 They're gonna kill her. We're fucked, Walter. 587 00:32:27,320 --> 00:32:30,596 Nothing is fucked, Dude. You're being very unDude. 588 00:32:30,680 --> 00:32:32,910 They'll call back. She kidnapped... > 589 00:32:33,000 --> 00:32:34,479 [Telephone rings] 590 00:32:34,560 --> 00:32:37,757 You see? Nothing's fucked here, Dude. 591 00:32:37,840 --> 00:32:40,149 They're a bunch of fuckin' amateurs! 592 00:32:40,240 --> 00:32:42,515 Hey, will you shut the fuck up? 593 00:32:42,600 --> 00:32:45,398 Don't say peep while I'm doin' business here. 594 00:32:45,480 --> 00:32:47,710 OK, Dude, have it your way. 595 00:32:48,760 --> 00:32:51,320 - But they're amateurs. - Fuck. 596 00:32:52,560 --> 00:32:54,391 - Dude. - 'OK, we proceed, 597 00:32:54,480 --> 00:32:56,550 'but only if there's no funny stuff.' 598 00:32:56,640 --> 00:32:58,437 Yeah, yeah. 599 00:32:58,520 --> 00:33:00,476 'So no funny stuff, OK? ' 600 00:33:00,560 --> 00:33:03,120 Just tell me where the fuck to go. 601 00:33:06,720 --> 00:33:09,154 That was the sign, man. 602 00:33:09,240 --> 00:33:12,312 So all we gotta do is get her back. 603 00:33:12,400 --> 00:33:15,517 No one can complain, and we keep the baksheesh. 604 00:33:15,600 --> 00:33:17,158 Terrific, Walter, 605 00:33:17,240 --> 00:33:19,674 but how are we gonna get her back? 606 00:33:19,760 --> 00:33:21,671 That's the simple part, Dude. 607 00:33:21,760 --> 00:33:25,389 We make the hand-off, I grab one, beat it out of him. 608 00:33:25,480 --> 00:33:28,631 - Huh? - Yeah. That's a great plan. 609 00:33:28,720 --> 00:33:31,996 That's fucking ingenious, if I understand it correctly. 610 00:33:32,080 --> 00:33:34,036 It's a Swiss fuckin' watch. 611 00:33:34,120 --> 00:33:36,873 Yeah, the beauty of this is its simplicity. 612 00:33:36,960 --> 00:33:39,520 If it gets complex, everything can go wrong. 613 00:33:39,600 --> 00:33:41,591 If I learned one thing in 'Nam, it's... 614 00:33:41,680 --> 00:33:43,557 [Telephone rings] 615 00:33:45,240 --> 00:33:47,708 - Dude. - 'You're coming to a bridge. 616 00:33:47,800 --> 00:33:49,631 'When you cross the bridge, 617 00:33:49,720 --> 00:33:53,918 'you throw the bag from the left window. You're being watched.' 618 00:33:54,000 --> 00:33:55,479 [Dial tone] Fuck! 619 00:33:55,560 --> 00:33:57,437 What'd he say? Where's the hand-off? > 620 00:33:57,520 --> 00:34:00,830 There isn't one, we throw the money out of the car. 621 00:34:00,920 --> 00:34:04,310 < We throw the money out of the moving car! 622 00:34:04,400 --> 00:34:07,631 We can't do that. That fucks up our plan. 623 00:34:07,720 --> 00:34:09,790 Call 'em and explain it to them. 624 00:34:09,880 --> 00:34:13,953 You're plan is so simple I'm sure they'll understand. 625 00:34:14,040 --> 00:34:17,635 I'm throwin' the money, Walter. We're not fuckin' around. 626 00:34:17,720 --> 00:34:19,915 Bridge is comin' up. Give me the ringer. 627 00:34:20,000 --> 00:34:23,356 Fuck that. I love ya, but you have to face the fact 628 00:34:23,440 --> 00:34:26,034 - you're a goddamn moron. - No time to argue. 629 00:34:26,120 --> 00:34:27,712 - Hey, man. - The bridge. 630 00:34:27,800 --> 00:34:30,155 Hey, Walter! Hey! Walter! 631 00:34:30,240 --> 00:34:32,356 There goes the ringer! 632 00:34:33,080 --> 00:34:35,071 - What the fuck? - Here, your wheel. 633 00:34:35,160 --> 00:34:38,994 At 15 mph, I roll out, grab one and beat it out of him. 634 00:34:39,080 --> 00:34:40,832 - The Uzi. - Uzi? 635 00:34:40,920 --> 00:34:43,150 - I'm not rolling out naked. - Walter, please! 636 00:34:43,240 --> 00:34:45,037 15, Dude. This is it. 637 00:34:45,720 --> 00:34:47,312 [Uzi firing] 638 00:35:00,480 --> 00:35:02,038 Aah... aah. 639 00:35:06,560 --> 00:35:09,791 We have it! We have it! 640 00:35:10,960 --> 00:35:13,793 We have it! 641 00:35:13,880 --> 00:35:15,916 [Gasping] We... have it! 642 00:35:28,760 --> 00:35:30,955 Aw, fuck it, Dude. 643 00:35:31,040 --> 00:35:33,031 Let's go bowling. 644 00:35:36,600 --> 00:35:39,353 [Portable phone rings] 645 00:35:47,040 --> 00:35:49,190 [Ball hits pins] 646 00:35:54,080 --> 00:35:56,799 [Phone continues to ring] 647 00:36:09,480 --> 00:36:12,552 Etz chaim he, Dude, as the ex used to say. 648 00:36:12,640 --> 00:36:14,596 What the fuck does that mean? 649 00:36:14,680 --> 00:36:17,069 What the fuck are we gonna tell Lebowski? 650 00:36:17,160 --> 00:36:18,957 Huh? Oh, him. Uh... 651 00:36:19,040 --> 00:36:21,031 [Phone still ringing] 652 00:36:21,120 --> 00:36:23,350 Well, what exactly is the problem? 653 00:36:23,440 --> 00:36:25,396 The problem is... 654 00:36:25,480 --> 00:36:27,675 What do you mean, what's the... 655 00:36:27,760 --> 00:36:29,876 [Ringing stops] There was no... 656 00:36:29,960 --> 00:36:32,394 We... we didn't, uh... 657 00:36:32,480 --> 00:36:35,199 They're gonna kill that poor woman. 658 00:36:35,280 --> 00:36:37,316 The poor woman... 659 00:36:37,400 --> 00:36:40,870 That poor SLUT kidnapped herself. You said so yourself. 660 00:36:40,960 --> 00:36:43,428 I said I THOUGHT she kidnapped herself. 661 00:36:43,520 --> 00:36:46,751 - You're the one who's certain. - 100% certain. 662 00:36:46,840 --> 00:36:49,434 - They posted the next round. - Shut the fuck... 663 00:36:49,520 --> 00:36:51,988 - When do we play? - This Saturday. 664 00:36:52,080 --> 00:36:54,071 Saturday? They have to reschedule. 665 00:36:54,160 --> 00:36:55,752 What am I gonna tell Lebowski? 666 00:36:55,840 --> 00:36:58,229 I told that fuck at the league office... 667 00:36:58,320 --> 00:37:00,880 - Who's in charge of scheduling? - Burkhalter. 668 00:37:00,960 --> 00:37:03,872 I told that kraut I don't roll on Shabbos. 669 00:37:03,960 --> 00:37:06,793 - He already posted it. - He can fuckin' unpost it! 670 00:37:06,880 --> 00:37:10,077 Who gives a shit? They're gonna kill that woman. 671 00:37:10,160 --> 00:37:12,151 What am I gonna tell Lebowski? 672 00:37:12,240 --> 00:37:14,913 She'll get tired of her game and go back. 673 00:37:15,000 --> 00:37:17,389 - Why not on Saturday? - I'm Shomer Shabbos. 674 00:37:17,480 --> 00:37:19,118 < What's that? 675 00:37:19,200 --> 00:37:21,077 What do I tell Lebowski? 676 00:37:21,160 --> 00:37:23,754 Saturday is Shabbos, the Jewish day of rest. 677 00:37:23,840 --> 00:37:26,400 I don't work, I don't drive a car, 678 00:37:26,480 --> 00:37:29,040 I don't handle money, I don't turn on the oven, 679 00:37:29,120 --> 00:37:31,236 and I sure as shit don't fucking roll! 680 00:37:31,320 --> 00:37:32,992 Sheesh. 681 00:37:33,080 --> 00:37:35,196 Shomer Shabbos! 682 00:37:36,280 --> 00:37:39,192 - Walter, how am I gonna... - Shomer fucking Shabbos. 683 00:37:39,280 --> 00:37:42,670 - That's it! I'm outta here. - Come on, Dude. 684 00:37:42,760 --> 00:37:44,637 [Mouthing] 685 00:37:44,720 --> 00:37:46,438 Dude! Dude! 686 00:37:46,520 --> 00:37:48,511 Look, you just tell him... 687 00:37:48,600 --> 00:37:51,637 Tell him we made the drop and everything went... 688 00:37:51,720 --> 00:37:54,234 - How'd it go? - Went all right. 689 00:37:54,320 --> 00:37:57,517 Walter, we didn't make the fuckin' hand-off. 690 00:37:57,600 --> 00:38:00,558 They didn't get the fuckin' money! They're gonna... 691 00:38:00,640 --> 00:38:02,517 They're gonna kill that poor woman. 692 00:38:02,600 --> 00:38:05,114 # They're gonna kill that poor woman # 693 00:38:05,200 --> 00:38:08,033 If you can't go by car, how do you get around on Shammos? 694 00:38:08,120 --> 00:38:09,917 Really, Dude, you surprise me. 695 00:38:10,000 --> 00:38:13,117 They're not gonna do shit. What can they do to her? 696 00:38:13,200 --> 00:38:14,519 They're amateurs, and meanwhile, 697 00:38:14,600 --> 00:38:18,354 who's sittin' on a million fucking dollars? Am I wrong? 698 00:38:19,080 --> 00:38:22,197 Who's got a million fuckin' dollars in our car? 699 00:38:22,280 --> 00:38:23,872 Our car, Walter? 700 00:38:23,960 --> 00:38:27,714 What do they got? My dirty undies. My fuckin' whites. 701 00:38:27,800 --> 00:38:29,791 [Telephone rings] 702 00:38:31,840 --> 00:38:33,990 Say, Dude... 703 00:38:34,080 --> 00:38:36,878 where is your car? 704 00:38:36,960 --> 00:38:38,632 Who's got your undies? 705 00:38:38,720 --> 00:38:41,359 - Where's your car, Dude? - You don't know? 706 00:38:41,440 --> 00:38:45,479 It was parked in a handicap zone. Perhaps they towed it. 707 00:38:46,600 --> 00:38:49,319 You fuckin' know it's been stolen. 708 00:38:49,400 --> 00:38:53,154 Well, certainly, that's a possibility, Dude. 709 00:38:53,680 --> 00:38:55,910 Oh, fuck it. 710 00:38:57,200 --> 00:39:00,670 - Where you goin', Dude? - I'm going home, Donny. 711 00:39:00,760 --> 00:39:03,832 - Phone's ringing, Dude. - Thank you, Donny. 712 00:39:07,480 --> 00:39:09,914 [Phone ringing] 713 00:39:13,840 --> 00:39:15,319 [Ringing stops] 714 00:39:16,520 --> 00:39:18,556 Uh... yeah... 715 00:39:21,000 --> 00:39:24,788 Green... uh, some brown or... 716 00:39:24,880 --> 00:39:27,155 rust colouration. 717 00:39:27,240 --> 00:39:30,118 Was there anything of value in the car? 718 00:39:30,200 --> 00:39:32,873 < Oh. Uh, yeah... 719 00:39:32,960 --> 00:39:36,111 uh... a tape deck, some Creedence tapes, 720 00:39:36,200 --> 00:39:38,430 and there was a... uh... 721 00:39:39,800 --> 00:39:42,030 My briefcase. 722 00:39:42,880 --> 00:39:44,791 In the briefcase? 723 00:39:46,360 --> 00:39:48,954 Uh, uh, papers. 724 00:39:49,040 --> 00:39:51,031 You know, um, just papers. 725 00:39:51,120 --> 00:39:54,317 Uh, you know, uh, my papers. Business papers. 726 00:39:56,120 --> 00:39:58,031 And what do you do, sir? > 727 00:39:58,120 --> 00:39:59,917 I'm unemployed. 728 00:40:02,600 --> 00:40:05,672 [Home telephone rings] My rug was also stolen. 729 00:40:05,760 --> 00:40:07,955 Your rug was in the car? 730 00:40:08,040 --> 00:40:09,871 No, here. 731 00:40:09,960 --> 00:40:12,190 Separate incidents? 732 00:40:13,080 --> 00:40:15,719 [Answering machine] 'The Dude is not in... ' 733 00:40:15,800 --> 00:40:18,872 Do you find them much, these stolen cars? 734 00:40:18,960 --> 00:40:21,554 Sometimes. > 735 00:40:21,640 --> 00:40:25,315 - No hope for the tape deck. - Or the Creedence. 736 00:40:25,400 --> 00:40:28,756 Well, what about, uh... [Answering machine beeps] 737 00:40:28,840 --> 00:40:30,432 The briefcase? 738 00:40:30,520 --> 00:40:33,159 [Woman] 'Mr Lebowski, I'd like to see you. 739 00:40:33,240 --> 00:40:36,630 'My name is Maude Lebowski. I'm the one who took your rug.' 740 00:40:36,720 --> 00:40:37,835 Whoa. > 741 00:40:37,920 --> 00:40:41,549 Guess we can close the file on that one. 742 00:40:41,640 --> 00:40:45,155 [Heavy door opens and closes] 743 00:40:45,720 --> 00:40:48,632 [Woman chanting breathily] 744 00:41:12,920 --> 00:41:14,319 Huh. 745 00:41:14,400 --> 00:41:16,630 [Chanting reverberates in room] 746 00:41:16,720 --> 00:41:18,836 [Heavy thud] 747 00:41:18,920 --> 00:41:21,514 [Mechanism rumbling] 748 00:41:26,320 --> 00:41:28,470 [Woman] Elfranco, ayudame abajo. 749 00:41:28,560 --> 00:41:32,678 I'll be with you in a moment, Mr Lebowski. 750 00:41:50,200 --> 00:41:53,988 Does the female form make you uncomfortable, Mr Lebowski? 751 00:41:54,080 --> 00:41:56,116 Is that what this is a picture of? 752 00:41:56,200 --> 00:41:57,713 In a sense, yes. 753 00:41:57,800 --> 00:42:01,156 My art is strongly vaginal, which bothers some men. 754 00:42:01,240 --> 00:42:05,199 The word itself makes some men uncomfortable. Vagina. 755 00:42:05,280 --> 00:42:06,793 Oh, yeah? 756 00:42:06,880 --> 00:42:10,156 They find it difficult to say, but without batting an eye, 757 00:42:10,240 --> 00:42:14,153 a man will refer to his dick or his rod or his... johnson. 758 00:42:15,160 --> 00:42:17,674 - Johnson? - All right, Mr Lebowski. 759 00:42:17,760 --> 00:42:19,478 Let's get down to cases. 760 00:42:19,560 --> 00:42:21,835 My father agreed to let you have the rug, 761 00:42:21,920 --> 00:42:24,229 but it was a gift from me to my late mother, 762 00:42:24,320 --> 00:42:26,197 and not his to give. Now... 763 00:42:26,280 --> 00:42:28,191 Your face. 764 00:42:28,280 --> 00:42:30,669 - As for this kidnapping... - Huh? 765 00:42:30,760 --> 00:42:34,753 I know all about it, and that you acted as courier. 766 00:42:34,840 --> 00:42:38,879 Let me tell you something. It stinks to high heaven. 767 00:42:38,960 --> 00:42:42,111 Right, but let me explain something about the rug. 768 00:42:42,200 --> 00:42:45,397 - Do you like sex, Mr Lebowski? - Excuse me? 769 00:42:45,480 --> 00:42:47,471 Sex. The physical act of love. 770 00:42:47,560 --> 00:42:49,551 Coitus. Do you like it? 771 00:42:49,640 --> 00:42:51,517 I was talking about my rug. 772 00:42:51,600 --> 00:42:54,956 - You're not interested in sex? - You mean coitus? 773 00:42:55,040 --> 00:42:58,874 I like it. It's a myth about feminists that we hate sex. 774 00:42:58,960 --> 00:43:02,794 It can be a natural, zesty enterprise. But some people - 775 00:43:02,880 --> 00:43:05,474 satyriasis in men, nymphomania in women - 776 00:43:05,560 --> 00:43:08,120 engage in it compulsively and without joy. 777 00:43:08,200 --> 00:43:11,397 - Oh, no. - Oh, yes, Mr Lebowski. 778 00:43:11,480 --> 00:43:15,075 They cannot love in the true sense of the word. 779 00:43:15,160 --> 00:43:18,436 Our mutual acquaintance, Bunny, is one of these. 780 00:43:18,520 --> 00:43:20,397 Listen, Maude, 781 00:43:20,480 --> 00:43:24,189 um, I'm sorry if your stepmother is a nympho, 782 00:43:24,280 --> 00:43:26,874 but what has that to do with, uh... 783 00:43:26,960 --> 00:43:30,555 - Do you have any Kahlua? - Take a look at this, sir. 784 00:43:30,640 --> 00:43:32,232 Hmm? 785 00:43:33,600 --> 00:43:35,955 Oh, I know that guy. 786 00:43:36,560 --> 00:43:38,516 He's a nihilist. 787 00:43:39,880 --> 00:43:41,916 < Karl Hungus... 788 00:43:54,600 --> 00:43:57,160 - 'Hi. - Hello. Meine dispatcher says 789 00:43:57,240 --> 00:43:59,834 'there's something wrong mit deine kabel. 790 00:43:59,920 --> 00:44:03,037 'Come in. I'm not sure exactly what's wrong. 791 00:44:03,120 --> 00:44:05,714 'Zat's why they sent me. I am an expert. 792 00:44:05,800 --> 00:44:06,755 'The TV's in here.' 793 00:44:06,840 --> 00:44:09,070 You recognise her, of course. 794 00:44:12,920 --> 00:44:16,037 [Bunny] 'That's my friend. She came over to use the shower.' 795 00:44:16,120 --> 00:44:18,236 The story is ludicrous. 796 00:44:18,320 --> 00:44:21,278 'Meine name is Karl. Ich bin expert.' 797 00:44:21,360 --> 00:44:23,157 'You're here to fix the cable.' 798 00:44:23,240 --> 00:44:26,676 [Maude] You can imagine where it goes from here. 799 00:44:26,760 --> 00:44:30,150 - He fixes the cable? - Don't be fatuous, Jeffrey. 800 00:44:30,240 --> 00:44:33,437 Little matter that she pursues a career in pornography 801 00:44:33,520 --> 00:44:35,670 nor that she's been "banging" Jackie Treehorn, 802 00:44:35,760 --> 00:44:38,069 to use the parlance of our times. 803 00:44:38,160 --> 00:44:41,869 But I am one of the two trustees of the Lebowski Foundation, 804 00:44:41,960 --> 00:44:43,757 the other being my father. 805 00:44:43,840 --> 00:44:45,671 < The Foundation takes youngsters... 806 00:44:45,760 --> 00:44:47,512 Shit, yeah, the achievers. 807 00:44:47,600 --> 00:44:50,114 < Little Lebowski Urban Achievers, yes. 808 00:44:50,200 --> 00:44:53,192 I asked my father about his withdrawal of $1 million, 809 00:44:53,280 --> 00:44:55,840 and he told me about this abduction. 810 00:44:55,920 --> 00:44:58,753 It is preposterous. This compulsive fornicator 811 00:44:58,840 --> 00:45:01,115 is taking my father for the proverbial ride. 812 00:45:01,200 --> 00:45:03,430 - But my... - I'm getting to your rug. 813 00:45:03,520 --> 00:45:05,317 My father and I don't get along. 814 00:45:05,400 --> 00:45:08,517 We don't approve of each other's lifestyles. 815 00:45:08,600 --> 00:45:12,275 But I hardly wish to make his embezzlement a police matter. 816 00:45:12,360 --> 00:45:16,512 I propose that you try to recover the money. 817 00:45:16,600 --> 00:45:19,910 Well, uh, I could do that. 818 00:45:20,000 --> 00:45:22,833 If you do so, I will compensate you 819 00:45:22,920 --> 00:45:25,832 to the tune of 10% of the recovered sum. 820 00:45:25,920 --> 00:45:27,433 A hundred... 821 00:45:27,520 --> 00:45:31,877 ...thousand, yes, bones or clams or whatever you call them. 822 00:45:31,960 --> 00:45:35,509 Yeah, but... but, uh... what about my, uh... 823 00:45:35,600 --> 00:45:38,558 Your rug. With that money you can buy any rug 824 00:45:38,640 --> 00:45:41,200 that doesn't have sentimental value for me. 825 00:45:41,280 --> 00:45:43,191 I am sorry about that crack on the jaw. 826 00:45:43,280 --> 00:45:45,840 Oh, that's fine. That doesn't even, uh... 827 00:45:45,920 --> 00:45:48,559 Here's the number of a doctor who will look at it. 828 00:45:48,640 --> 00:45:51,393 You'll receive no bill. He's a good man. 829 00:45:51,480 --> 00:45:54,199 - That's thoughtful, but... - Please see him. 830 00:45:54,280 --> 00:45:56,032 He's a good man. 831 00:45:57,840 --> 00:46:00,354 Oh, well... all right. 832 00:46:02,200 --> 00:46:03,030 He says, "My wife's a pain. 833 00:46:03,080 --> 00:46:05,514 "She's always bustin' my friggin' agates. 834 00:46:05,600 --> 00:46:08,319 "My daughter's married to a loser bastard, 835 00:46:08,400 --> 00:46:10,994 "and I got a rash so bad on my ass 836 00:46:11,080 --> 00:46:14,755 "I can't sit down. But you know me, can't complain." [Laughs] 837 00:46:14,840 --> 00:46:17,877 Ah, fuckin' A, man. I got a rash, man. 838 00:46:17,960 --> 00:46:19,632 Fuckin' A. 839 00:46:19,720 --> 00:46:21,756 I gotta tell you, man, 840 00:46:21,840 --> 00:46:25,196 earlier in the day, I was feeling shitty, man. 841 00:46:25,280 --> 00:46:26,872 Down in the dumps. 842 00:46:26,960 --> 00:46:28,916 Lost a little money... 843 00:46:29,000 --> 00:46:32,276 Hey, you know what? Forget about it, huh? 844 00:46:32,360 --> 00:46:35,989 I can't be worried about that shit. Life goes on, man. 845 00:46:36,080 --> 00:46:37,957 Home, sweet home, Mr L. 846 00:46:41,440 --> 00:46:45,149 Hey, yo. Look. Who's your friend in the Volkswagen? 847 00:46:45,240 --> 00:46:46,753 Huh? 848 00:46:46,840 --> 00:46:49,593 Yeah, he followed us here. 849 00:46:49,680 --> 00:46:52,831 When did he start foll... Aah! What the fuck? 850 00:46:52,920 --> 00:46:55,388 In the limo, you son of a bitch. No arguing. 851 00:46:55,480 --> 00:46:57,710 Careful, man. There's a beverage here. 852 00:46:58,960 --> 00:47:01,838 Start talking and talk fast, you lousy bum. 853 00:47:01,920 --> 00:47:04,229 We've been trying to reach you, Dude. 854 00:47:04,320 --> 00:47:07,039 Where's my goddamn money, you bum? 855 00:47:07,120 --> 00:47:08,917 W-well, we... 856 00:47:09,000 --> 00:47:10,672 I... I... I don't... 857 00:47:10,760 --> 00:47:13,797 They did not receive the money, you nitwit! 858 00:47:13,880 --> 00:47:17,509 - Her life was in your hands! - This is our concern, Dude. 859 00:47:17,600 --> 00:47:20,068 No, man, nothing is fucked here. 860 00:47:20,160 --> 00:47:22,071 - Nothing is fucked? - No, man. 861 00:47:22,160 --> 00:47:25,232 The goddamn plane has crashed into the mountain! 862 00:47:25,320 --> 00:47:28,949 Come on, who are you gonna believe, those guys or... 863 00:47:29,040 --> 00:47:31,076 We dropped off the damn money. 864 00:47:31,160 --> 00:47:32,991 We? 865 00:47:33,080 --> 00:47:35,036 I. 866 00:47:35,120 --> 00:47:38,669 The royal we. You know, the editorial. 867 00:47:38,760 --> 00:47:41,354 I dropped off the money exactly as per... 868 00:47:41,440 --> 00:47:43,749 I've got certain information, all right? 869 00:47:43,840 --> 00:47:46,434 Certain things have come to light, and... > 870 00:47:46,520 --> 00:47:48,954 Has it ever occurred to you 871 00:47:49,040 --> 00:47:53,079 that instead of, uh, you know, running around, 872 00:47:53,160 --> 00:47:56,755 uh, blaming me, given the nature of all this new shit, 873 00:47:56,840 --> 00:48:00,515 this could be a lot more, uh... 874 00:48:00,600 --> 00:48:02,511 Uh, uh, uh, complex? 875 00:48:02,600 --> 00:48:06,752 I mean, it might not be such a simple, uh... you know? 876 00:48:06,840 --> 00:48:09,798 What in God's name are you blathering about? 877 00:48:09,880 --> 00:48:13,190 I'll tell you what I'm blathering about. 878 00:48:13,280 --> 00:48:16,431 I've got information. New shit has come to light. 879 00:48:16,520 --> 00:48:18,636 And... and, shit, man... 880 00:48:20,120 --> 00:48:22,270 She kidnapped herself. 881 00:48:24,480 --> 00:48:26,232 < Well, sure, man. 882 00:48:26,320 --> 00:48:29,198 Look at it. A young trophy wife, 883 00:48:29,280 --> 00:48:31,430 in the parlance of our times. 884 00:48:31,520 --> 00:48:34,432 She, uh, uh, uh, owes money all over town, 885 00:48:34,520 --> 00:48:37,398 including to known pornographers. 886 00:48:38,320 --> 00:48:41,278 And that's cool. That's cool. 887 00:48:41,360 --> 00:48:44,352 I'm saying she needs money, man. > 888 00:48:44,440 --> 00:48:46,590 And... and, you know, 889 00:48:46,680 --> 00:48:49,592 of course they're gonna say they didn't get it, 890 00:48:49,680 --> 00:48:52,638 uh, uh, because she wants more, man. 891 00:48:52,720 --> 00:48:55,917 She's gotta feed the monkey. I mean, uh... 892 00:48:57,480 --> 00:49:01,109 Hasn't that ever occurred to you, man? Sir? 893 00:49:03,280 --> 00:49:06,875 No, Mr Lebowski, it had not occurred to me. 894 00:49:06,960 --> 00:49:10,316 That had not occurred to us, Dude. 895 00:49:10,400 --> 00:49:13,517 You guys aren't privy to all the new shit, so... 896 00:49:13,600 --> 00:49:15,716 uh, you know. But... 897 00:49:15,800 --> 00:49:18,951 Hey, that's what you pay me for. 898 00:49:20,600 --> 00:49:23,672 Speaking of which, do you think that you could... 899 00:49:23,760 --> 00:49:25,796 give me my 20,000 in cash? 900 00:49:25,880 --> 00:49:29,236 My concern is... and I gotta check with my accountant... 901 00:49:29,320 --> 00:49:31,959 but this might bump me into a higher tax... 902 00:49:32,040 --> 00:49:34,270 Brandt... Give him the envelope. 903 00:49:34,360 --> 00:49:38,319 Oh, if you've already got the cheque made out, that's cool. 904 00:49:38,400 --> 00:49:40,789 < We received this this morning. 905 00:49:42,040 --> 00:49:45,476 Since you have failed to achieve, 906 00:49:45,560 --> 00:49:48,836 even in the modest task which was your charge, 907 00:49:48,920 --> 00:49:52,515 since you have stolen my money, 908 00:49:52,600 --> 00:49:55,637 since you have unrepentantly betrayed my trust... 909 00:49:55,720 --> 00:49:57,438 I have no choice 910 00:49:57,520 --> 00:50:02,310 but to tell these bums to do whatever is necessary 911 00:50:02,400 --> 00:50:07,190 to recover their money from you, Jeffrey Lebowski. 912 00:50:07,280 --> 00:50:10,716 With Brandt as my witness, I will tell you this: 913 00:50:10,800 --> 00:50:15,112 Any further harm visited upon Bunny 914 00:50:15,200 --> 00:50:18,556 will be visited tenfold upon your head. 915 00:50:20,880 --> 00:50:25,829 < By God, sir, I will not abide another toe. 916 00:50:25,920 --> 00:50:30,789 # I hear the cottonwoods whisperin' above # 917 00:50:30,880 --> 00:50:33,599 That wasn't her toe, Dude. 918 00:50:33,680 --> 00:50:37,434 - Whose toe was it, Walter? - How the fuck should I know? 919 00:50:37,520 --> 00:50:39,988 Nothing about it indicates... 920 00:50:40,080 --> 00:50:42,469 - The nail polish, Walter. - Fine, Dude. 921 00:50:42,560 --> 00:50:46,473 You can get nail polish and apply it to someone else's toe. 922 00:50:46,560 --> 00:50:48,471 Where the fuck are they gonna get... 923 00:50:48,560 --> 00:50:51,438 You want a toe? I can get you a toe. 924 00:50:51,520 --> 00:50:53,590 Believe me, there are ways, Dude. 925 00:50:53,680 --> 00:50:55,750 You don't wanna know about it. 926 00:50:55,840 --> 00:50:59,549 I can get you a toe by 3 pm, with nail polish. 927 00:50:59,640 --> 00:51:02,518 These fuckin' amateurs. They send us a toe, 928 00:51:02,600 --> 00:51:06,036 we're supposed to shit ourselves with fear. Jesus Christ! 929 00:51:06,120 --> 00:51:09,078 They're gonna kill her and then me. 930 00:51:09,160 --> 00:51:12,391 Dude... that's... 931 00:51:12,480 --> 00:51:15,278 That's just the stress talking, man. 932 00:51:15,360 --> 00:51:17,476 We have what appears to me 933 00:51:17,560 --> 00:51:20,120 to be a series of victimless crimes. 934 00:51:20,200 --> 00:51:24,352 - What about the toe? - Forget about the fucking toe! 935 00:51:24,440 --> 00:51:27,512 Could you keep your voices down? This is a family restaurant. 936 00:51:27,600 --> 00:51:29,750 Dear, for your information, 937 00:51:29,840 --> 00:51:33,150 the Supreme Court has rejected prior restraint! 938 00:51:33,240 --> 00:51:34,958 This is not a First Amendment thing. 939 00:51:35,040 --> 00:51:38,077 If you don't calm down, you'll have to leave. 940 00:51:38,160 --> 00:51:41,311 Lady, my buddies died face-down in the muck 941 00:51:41,400 --> 00:51:44,233 so we could enjoy this family restaurant! 942 00:51:44,320 --> 00:51:46,959 - I'm outta here. - Dude, don't go away, man. 943 00:51:47,040 --> 00:51:48,837 This affects all of us. 944 00:51:48,920 --> 00:51:50,672 There are basic freedoms! > 945 00:51:55,080 --> 00:51:57,275 I'm stayin'. 946 00:51:58,560 --> 00:52:00,471 I'm finishing my coffee. 947 00:52:05,480 --> 00:52:08,040 Enjoying my coffee. 948 00:52:12,960 --> 00:52:15,315 [Telephone rings] 949 00:52:22,520 --> 00:52:25,432 [Answering machine] 'The Dude is not in. 950 00:52:25,520 --> 00:52:28,398 'Leave a message after the beep. Thanks, man.' 951 00:52:28,480 --> 00:52:29,674 [Beep] 952 00:52:29,760 --> 00:52:32,991 'Mr Lebowski, this is duty officer Rolvaag of the LAPD. 953 00:52:33,080 --> 00:52:35,230 'We've recovered your automobile. 954 00:52:35,320 --> 00:52:37,276 'It can be claimed at... ' 955 00:52:37,360 --> 00:52:40,113 Far out, man. Far fucking out! 956 00:52:40,200 --> 00:52:41,918 [Banging] 957 00:52:49,680 --> 00:52:52,797 Hey! This is a private residence, man. 958 00:53:01,200 --> 00:53:03,430 Ah, nice marmot. 959 00:53:08,560 --> 00:53:10,437 [Marmot squealing] 960 00:53:11,600 --> 00:53:16,993 Vere is the money, Lebowski. Ve vant the money, Lebowski. 961 00:53:21,640 --> 00:53:25,679 You zink ve are kidding or making with the funny stuff? 962 00:53:25,760 --> 00:53:28,399 Things you haven't dreamed of, Lebowski. 963 00:53:28,480 --> 00:53:31,199 Ve believes in nossing, Lebowski, nossing. 964 00:53:31,280 --> 00:53:34,033 Ve come back and ve cut off your chonson. 965 00:53:34,120 --> 00:53:35,553 Excuse me? 966 00:53:35,640 --> 00:53:38,473 I said we'll cut off your johnson! 967 00:53:38,560 --> 00:53:40,391 Just think about that, Lebowski. 968 00:53:40,480 --> 00:53:42,311 Ja, your viggly penis, Lebowski. 969 00:53:42,400 --> 00:53:45,073 Maybe we stomp on it and sqoosh it, Lebowski. 970 00:53:47,200 --> 00:53:48,997 [Glass shatters] 971 00:53:54,120 --> 00:53:55,951 [Man] It was discovered last night 972 00:53:56,040 --> 00:53:59,112 - lodged against an abutment. - Oh, man, lodged where? 973 00:53:59,200 --> 00:54:02,237 You're lucky she didn't get chopped, Mr Lebowski. 974 00:54:02,320 --> 00:54:04,117 A joyride situation. 975 00:54:04,200 --> 00:54:06,953 They abandon the vehicle once they hit the wall. 976 00:54:07,040 --> 00:54:10,271 My fucking briefcase! Man, it's not here. Shit! 977 00:54:10,360 --> 00:54:12,032 I saw the report. Sorry. 978 00:54:12,120 --> 00:54:14,509 You gotta get in on the other side. 979 00:54:14,600 --> 00:54:18,957 The side-view was found on the road by the car. 980 00:54:19,040 --> 00:54:22,749 You're lucky they left the tape deck, and the Creedence. 981 00:54:22,840 --> 00:54:26,230 Aw, Jesus! What's that smell, man? 982 00:54:26,320 --> 00:54:29,039 Probably a vagrant slept in the car 983 00:54:29,120 --> 00:54:31,111 or just used it as a toilet. 984 00:54:31,200 --> 00:54:33,430 Hey, man... 985 00:54:33,520 --> 00:54:36,353 Are you gonna find these guys, you know... 986 00:54:36,440 --> 00:54:39,557 I mean, you got any promising, uh, leads or... 987 00:54:39,640 --> 00:54:42,632 Leads? Yeah, sure. 988 00:54:42,720 --> 00:54:46,599 I'll just check with the boys down at the crime lab. 989 00:54:46,680 --> 00:54:49,877 They got four more detectives working on the case. 990 00:54:49,960 --> 00:54:52,269 They got us working in shifts. 991 00:54:56,920 --> 00:54:58,831 Leads? 992 00:54:58,920 --> 00:55:00,911 [Dude] I hope the big Lebowski kills me 993 00:55:01,000 --> 00:55:04,276 before the Germans can cut my dick off. 994 00:55:04,520 --> 00:55:07,956 That is just ridiculous, Dude. No one'll cut your dick off. 995 00:55:08,040 --> 00:55:10,873 - Thank you. - Not if I have anything to say. 996 00:55:10,960 --> 00:55:13,428 - That makes me feel secure. - Dude. 997 00:55:13,520 --> 00:55:16,239 - It makes me feel warm inside. - Now, Dude. 998 00:55:16,320 --> 00:55:18,470 This whole fuckin' thing. 999 00:55:18,560 --> 00:55:22,838 I could be sitting here with just pee stains on my rug. 1000 00:55:22,920 --> 00:55:25,753 - But, no, man, I gotta... - Fucking Germans. 1001 00:55:25,840 --> 00:55:28,752 Nothing changes. Fucking Nazis. 1002 00:55:28,840 --> 00:55:31,070 They were Nazis, Dude? 1003 00:55:31,160 --> 00:55:34,152 Come on, Donny, they were threatening castration. 1004 00:55:34,240 --> 00:55:36,196 - Are we gonna split hairs? - No. 1005 00:55:36,280 --> 00:55:38,191 - Am I wrong? - Well, he... 1006 00:55:38,280 --> 00:55:39,872 They were nihilists, man. 1007 00:55:39,960 --> 00:55:42,315 They kept saying they believed in nothing. 1008 00:55:42,400 --> 00:55:44,960 Nihilists. 1009 00:55:45,040 --> 00:55:47,429 Fuck me. 1010 00:55:48,120 --> 00:55:51,795 Say what you want about the tenets of national socialism, 1011 00:55:51,880 --> 00:55:53,996 at least it's an ethos. 1012 00:55:54,080 --> 00:55:56,719 And also, let's not forget, Dude, 1013 00:55:56,800 --> 00:56:00,110 that keeping wildlife, um, an amphibious rodent 1014 00:56:00,200 --> 00:56:02,760 for, um, you know, domestic... 1015 00:56:02,840 --> 00:56:04,717 within the city... 1016 00:56:04,800 --> 00:56:06,677 That ain't legal either. 1017 00:56:06,760 --> 00:56:09,877 - Are you a fucking park ranger? - No, I'm just... 1018 00:56:09,960 --> 00:56:12,872 Who gives a shit about the fucking marmot? 1019 00:56:12,960 --> 00:56:16,077 - We are sympathising, Dude. - Fuck sympathy. 1020 00:56:16,160 --> 00:56:20,039 I don't need your fucking sympathy. I need my johnson. 1021 00:56:20,120 --> 00:56:23,351 - What do you need that for? - You've got to buck up! 1022 00:56:23,440 --> 00:56:26,750 You cannot drag this negative energy into the tournament. 1023 00:56:26,840 --> 00:56:29,798 Fuck the tournament. Fuck you, Walter. 1024 00:56:29,880 --> 00:56:32,713 Fuck the tournament? 1025 00:56:32,800 --> 00:56:36,509 OK, Dude. I can see you don't want to be cheered up. 1026 00:56:36,600 --> 00:56:39,797 Come on, Donny. Let's go get us a lane. 1027 00:56:43,240 --> 00:56:46,437 - Another Caucasian, Gary. - Right, Dude. 1028 00:56:48,160 --> 00:56:50,515 Friends like these, huh, Gary? 1029 00:56:50,600 --> 00:56:52,591 That's right, Dude. 1030 00:56:55,240 --> 00:56:58,391 [Jukebox plays Tumbling Tumbleweeds] 1031 00:57:12,840 --> 00:57:16,753 [Western drawl] Do you have a good Sarsaparilla? 1032 00:57:16,840 --> 00:57:18,751 [Bartender] Sioux City Sarsaparilla? 1033 00:57:18,840 --> 00:57:21,229 Yeah. That's a good one. 1034 00:57:23,000 --> 00:57:25,116 How you doin' there, Dude? 1035 00:57:25,920 --> 00:57:27,990 Not too good, man. 1036 00:57:28,080 --> 00:57:31,755 - One of those days, huh? - Yeah. 1037 00:57:31,840 --> 00:57:33,398 Well... 1038 00:57:33,480 --> 00:57:36,233 A wiser fella than myself once said, 1039 00:57:36,320 --> 00:57:39,471 "Sometimes you eat the bar and..." 1040 00:57:39,560 --> 00:57:41,676 Much obliged. 1041 00:57:41,760 --> 00:57:44,194 "And sometimes the bar, well... 1042 00:57:44,280 --> 00:57:45,998 "he eats you." 1043 00:57:46,080 --> 00:57:49,277 Hmm. That some kind of Eastern thing? 1044 00:57:50,080 --> 00:57:52,036 Far from it. 1045 00:57:57,480 --> 00:57:59,835 I like your style, Dude. 1046 00:57:59,920 --> 00:58:02,195 Hmm. Well... 1047 00:58:02,280 --> 00:58:04,510 I dig your style, too, man. 1048 00:58:04,600 --> 00:58:06,989 You got a whole cowboy thing going. 1049 00:58:10,280 --> 00:58:11,998 Thankee. 1050 00:58:12,080 --> 00:58:15,789 - There's just one thing, Dude. - What's that? 1051 00:58:15,880 --> 00:58:19,111 Do you have to use so many cuss words? 1052 00:58:20,840 --> 00:58:23,354 What the fuck are you talking about? 1053 00:58:25,480 --> 00:58:28,472 OK, Dude, have it your way. 1054 00:58:29,680 --> 00:58:32,069 Take her easy, Dude. 1055 00:58:32,160 --> 00:58:34,469 Yeah. Thanks, man. 1056 00:58:39,360 --> 00:58:41,590 Call for you, Dude. 1057 00:58:44,880 --> 00:58:46,108 Hello? 1058 00:58:46,200 --> 00:58:49,112 [Maude] 'Jeffrey, you have not gone to the doctor.' 1059 00:58:49,200 --> 00:58:52,272 Uh, oh, yeah. No... no, I haven't yet. 1060 00:58:52,360 --> 00:58:54,828 'I'd like to see you immediately.' 1061 00:58:54,920 --> 00:58:56,478 Oh? 1062 00:59:07,040 --> 00:59:11,477 - So you're Lebowski. - Yeah. 1063 00:59:14,000 --> 00:59:15,956 < Maude has told me all about you. 1064 00:59:16,040 --> 00:59:19,077 She'll be back in a minute. Sit down. 1065 00:59:19,160 --> 00:59:22,391 - Do you want a drink? - Yeah, sure. White Russian. 1066 00:59:22,480 --> 00:59:24,914 The bar's over there. 1067 00:59:29,000 --> 00:59:33,118 - So what do you do, Lebowski? - Who the fuck are you, man? 1068 00:59:33,200 --> 00:59:34,679 [Snickers] 1069 00:59:34,760 --> 00:59:36,557 Just a friend of Maudie's. 1070 00:59:36,640 --> 00:59:38,710 The friend with the cleft asshole? 1071 00:59:38,800 --> 00:59:40,677 [Laughing] 1072 00:59:40,760 --> 00:59:43,194 What do you do? 1073 00:59:43,280 --> 00:59:45,236 Oh, nothing much. 1074 00:59:45,320 --> 00:59:47,276 [Maude] Hello, Jeffrey. 1075 00:59:47,360 --> 00:59:50,511 Yeah, how are you? Listen, Maude, 1076 00:59:50,600 --> 00:59:53,068 I got to, uh... 1077 00:59:54,400 --> 00:59:56,391 tender my resignation or whatever. 1078 00:59:56,480 --> 01:00:01,508 It looks like your mother really was kidnapped after all. 1079 01:00:01,600 --> 01:00:03,318 She most certainly was not. 1080 01:00:03,400 --> 01:00:06,358 Hey, man, why don't you fucking... 1081 01:00:06,440 --> 01:00:09,512 listen occasionally? You might learn something. 1082 01:00:09,600 --> 01:00:12,353 - Now, I got... - Don't call her my mother. 1083 01:00:12,440 --> 01:00:13,793 [Man snickering] 1084 01:00:13,880 --> 01:00:15,996 She's the perpetrator and not the victim. 1085 01:00:16,080 --> 01:00:18,833 I got pretty definitive evidence... 1086 01:00:18,920 --> 01:00:21,753 - From who? - From the main guy, Uli. 1087 01:00:21,840 --> 01:00:24,752 Uli Kunkel? Her co-star in the beaver picture? 1088 01:00:24,840 --> 01:00:27,513 Beaver? You mean vagina... 1089 01:00:27,600 --> 01:00:29,830 I mean, you know the guy? 1090 01:00:29,920 --> 01:00:32,798 I might have introduced them for all I know. 1091 01:00:32,880 --> 01:00:34,791 - Do you remember Uli? - Hmm. 1092 01:00:34,880 --> 01:00:38,156 He's a musician. Used to have a group, Autobahn. 1093 01:00:38,240 --> 01:00:41,391 They released one album in the late 70s. 1094 01:00:41,480 --> 01:00:44,517 < Their music is sort of a... ugh... technopop. 1095 01:00:44,600 --> 01:00:46,909 < So he's pretending to be the abductor? 1096 01:00:47,000 --> 01:00:49,116 - Well, yeah. - Look, Jeffrey, 1097 01:00:49,200 --> 01:00:51,760 you don't kidnap someone you're acquainted with. 1098 01:00:51,840 --> 01:00:54,274 The idea is that the hostage can't identify you 1099 01:00:54,360 --> 01:00:56,794 - after you've let them go. - I know that. 1100 01:00:56,880 --> 01:00:58,836 [High-pitched laughter] 1101 01:01:01,160 --> 01:01:04,197 What the fuck is with this guy? Who is he? 1102 01:01:04,280 --> 01:01:07,670 Knox Harrington. The video artist. > 1103 01:01:07,760 --> 01:01:11,230 - So Uli has the money? - Well... 1104 01:01:11,320 --> 01:01:13,675 Uh, no, not exactly, uh... 1105 01:01:13,760 --> 01:01:16,433 This is a very complicated case, Maude. 1106 01:01:16,520 --> 01:01:17,953 [Telephone rings] 1107 01:01:18,040 --> 01:01:20,998 < A lot of ins and outs and what-have-yous... 1108 01:01:21,080 --> 01:01:23,036 < A lot of strands to keep in my head. 1109 01:01:23,120 --> 01:01:25,395 < A lot of strands in old Duder's head. 1110 01:01:25,480 --> 01:01:26,879 Then who has the money? 1111 01:01:26,960 --> 01:01:29,713 It's Sandra, about the Biennale. 1112 01:01:29,800 --> 01:01:33,156 I have to take this. Do you have that doctor's number? 1113 01:01:33,240 --> 01:01:36,550 - It's not bruised any more. - Please, Jeffrey, 1114 01:01:36,640 --> 01:01:40,189 I don't want to be responsible for any delayed after-effects. 1115 01:01:40,280 --> 01:01:41,998 [Speaking Italian] 1116 01:01:42,080 --> 01:01:43,877 After-effects? 1117 01:01:43,960 --> 01:01:45,791 [Maude] S�. S�. 1118 01:01:56,360 --> 01:01:58,555 [Rock music] 1119 01:02:11,840 --> 01:02:15,116 Could you slide your shorts down, Mr Lebowski, please? 1120 01:02:15,200 --> 01:02:17,919 Hmm? No, man. She hit me right here. 1121 01:02:18,000 --> 01:02:19,672 I understand. > 1122 01:02:19,760 --> 01:02:23,275 Could you slide your shorts down, please? > 1123 01:02:24,360 --> 01:02:26,794 [Creedence Clearwater] 1124 01:02:32,440 --> 01:02:35,034 # Just got home from Illinois 1125 01:02:35,120 --> 01:02:37,156 # Lock the front door, oh, boy 1126 01:02:37,240 --> 01:02:41,199 # Got to sit down, take a rest on the porch 1127 01:02:41,280 --> 01:02:43,635 # Imagination sets in 1128 01:02:43,720 --> 01:02:45,836 # Pretty soon I'm singin' 1129 01:02:45,920 --> 01:02:49,595 # Doo doo doo Lookin' out my back door 1130 01:02:49,680 --> 01:02:52,353 # There's a giant doing cartwheels 1131 01:02:52,440 --> 01:02:54,635 # A statue wearin' high heels 1132 01:02:54,720 --> 01:02:57,075 # Look at all the happy creatures 1133 01:02:57,160 --> 01:02:58,798 # Dancin' on the lawn 1134 01:02:58,880 --> 01:03:01,314 # A dinosaur victrola 1135 01:03:01,400 --> 01:03:03,356 # Listenin' to Buck Owens 1136 01:03:03,440 --> 01:03:07,433 # Doo doo doo Lookin' out my back door # 1137 01:03:07,520 --> 01:03:08,839 Ow! Ooh! Ooh! 1138 01:03:08,920 --> 01:03:12,356 # Tambourines and elephants are playing in the band 1139 01:03:12,440 --> 01:03:16,069 # Wondrous apparition 1140 01:03:16,160 --> 01:03:18,720 # Provided by magician 1141 01:03:18,800 --> 01:03:22,952 # Doo doo doo Lookin' out my back door 1142 01:03:40,600 --> 01:03:42,352 # Tambourines and elephants 1143 01:03:42,440 --> 01:03:45,238 # Are playing in the band 1144 01:03:45,320 --> 01:03:48,039 # Won't you take a ride on the flyin' spoon? 1145 01:03:48,120 --> 01:03:49,951 # Doo doo doo 1146 01:03:50,040 --> 01:03:51,792 # Bother me tomorrow 1147 01:03:51,880 --> 01:03:54,110 # Today I'll buy no sorrows 1148 01:03:54,200 --> 01:03:58,034 # Doo doo doo Lookin' out my back door # 1149 01:04:05,080 --> 01:04:07,548 [Dramatic music] 1150 01:04:47,680 --> 01:04:49,830 He lives in North Hollywood, 1151 01:04:49,920 --> 01:04:51,911 on Radford, near the In 'n' Out Burger. 1152 01:04:52,000 --> 01:04:53,752 The In 'n' Out Burger's on Camrose. 1153 01:04:53,840 --> 01:04:55,990 - Near it. - Those are good burgers. 1154 01:04:56,080 --> 01:04:57,832 Shut the fuck up, Donny. 1155 01:04:57,920 --> 01:05:00,753 The kid's in ninth grade, and his father... 1156 01:05:00,840 --> 01:05:04,753 Are you ready for this? His father is Arthur Digby Sellers. 1157 01:05:04,840 --> 01:05:06,592 - Who the fuck is that? - Huh? 1158 01:05:06,680 --> 01:05:09,114 Who the fuck is Arthur Digby Sellers? 1159 01:05:09,200 --> 01:05:12,317 Ever heard of a show called "Branded"? 1160 01:05:12,400 --> 01:05:15,551 "All but one man died there at Bitter Creek"? 1161 01:05:15,640 --> 01:05:17,676 I know the fucking show. So what? 1162 01:05:17,760 --> 01:05:21,469 Fucking Arthur Digby Sellers wrote 156 episodes, Dude. 1163 01:05:21,560 --> 01:05:24,074 - The bulk of the series. - Oh. 1164 01:05:24,160 --> 01:05:26,594 - Not exactly a lightweight. - No. 1165 01:05:26,680 --> 01:05:30,116 And yet his son is a fucking dunce. 1166 01:05:30,200 --> 01:05:32,509 We'll go there after the what-have-you, 1167 01:05:32,600 --> 01:05:34,397 we'll brace the kid. 1168 01:05:34,480 --> 01:05:36,391 We'll be near the In 'n' Out Burger. 1169 01:05:36,480 --> 01:05:38,835 Shut the fuck up, Donny! 1170 01:05:38,920 --> 01:05:42,595 We'll brace the kid. He should be a pushover. 1171 01:05:42,680 --> 01:05:44,796 We'll get that fucking $1 million back... 1172 01:05:44,880 --> 01:05:46,757 If he hasn't spent it already. 1173 01:05:46,840 --> 01:05:48,717 A million fucking clams. 1174 01:05:48,800 --> 01:05:51,951 - Yes, we'll be near the, uh... - In 'n' Out. 1175 01:05:52,040 --> 01:05:53,598 Hey, shh! Shh! 1176 01:05:53,680 --> 01:05:56,592 Some burgers, some beers, a few laughs. 1177 01:05:57,640 --> 01:06:01,599 Our fucking troubles are over, Dude. 1178 01:06:05,600 --> 01:06:07,909 [Car rattling] 1179 01:06:12,000 --> 01:06:15,072 Oh, fuck me, man! 1180 01:06:15,160 --> 01:06:18,152 That kid's already spent all the money, man! 1181 01:06:18,240 --> 01:06:20,629 New 'vette? Hardly, Dude. 1182 01:06:20,720 --> 01:06:24,190 I'd say he still has 960, $970,000 left, 1183 01:06:24,280 --> 01:06:27,397 depending on the options. Wait in the car, Donny. 1184 01:06:27,480 --> 01:06:29,232 [Knocking] 1185 01:06:30,600 --> 01:06:33,068 - [Woman] Yes? - Pilar? 1186 01:06:33,880 --> 01:06:35,711 My name is Walter Sobchak. 1187 01:06:35,800 --> 01:06:38,712 This is my associate Jeffrey Lebowski. 1188 01:06:38,800 --> 01:06:42,588 We came to talk about little Larry. May we come in? 1189 01:06:42,680 --> 01:06:44,750 - Yes, yes. - Thank you. 1190 01:06:48,920 --> 01:06:51,229 That's him, Dude. 1191 01:06:53,160 --> 01:06:55,958 [Machine hissing] 1192 01:06:58,000 --> 01:07:00,798 And a good day to you, sir! 1193 01:07:00,880 --> 01:07:03,155 Uh, sit down, please. 1194 01:07:07,440 --> 01:07:10,159 Larry, sweetie, that man is here! 1195 01:07:10,240 --> 01:07:13,516 Is he... Does he still write? 1196 01:07:13,600 --> 01:07:16,592 Oh, no, no. He has health problems. 1197 01:07:16,680 --> 01:07:17,954 Uh-huh. 1198 01:07:19,080 --> 01:07:22,390 Uh, sir, I just want to say, uh... 1199 01:07:22,480 --> 01:07:25,790 that we're both, on a personal level, 1200 01:07:25,880 --> 01:07:27,791 really enormous fans. 1201 01:07:27,880 --> 01:07:30,792 "Branded", especially the early episodes, > 1202 01:07:30,880 --> 01:07:33,189 was truly a source of inspiration... 1203 01:07:33,280 --> 01:07:35,748 [Pilar] Sweetie, sit down! This is the police. 1204 01:07:35,840 --> 01:07:39,276 Oh, no, ma'am, we are not exactly the police. 1205 01:07:39,360 --> 01:07:41,749 We hope it won't be necessary to call the police. 1206 01:07:41,840 --> 01:07:44,400 But that's up to little Larry here. > 1207 01:07:44,480 --> 01:07:46,710 Isn't it, Larry? 1208 01:07:56,240 --> 01:07:58,231 Is this your homework, Larry? 1209 01:08:00,640 --> 01:08:02,596 - Is this your homework? - Look, man... 1210 01:08:02,680 --> 01:08:05,911 Dude, please. Is this your homework, Larry? 1211 01:08:06,000 --> 01:08:07,718 Just ask him about the car. 1212 01:08:07,800 --> 01:08:10,758 - Is this your homework, Larry? - Is that your car out front? 1213 01:08:10,840 --> 01:08:13,912 - Is this your homework, Larry? - We know it's his homework! 1214 01:08:14,000 --> 01:08:15,513 Where's the fucking money? 1215 01:08:15,600 --> 01:08:17,556 Look, Larry... > 1216 01:08:17,640 --> 01:08:19,232 Have you heard of Vietnam? 1217 01:08:19,320 --> 01:08:22,198 You're entering a world of pain, son. 1218 01:08:22,280 --> 01:08:24,157 We know that you stole the car. 1219 01:08:24,240 --> 01:08:26,196 - And the fucking money! - And the fucking money. 1220 01:08:26,280 --> 01:08:28,316 We know that this is your homework. 1221 01:08:28,400 --> 01:08:31,278 - We'll cut your dick off. - You're killing your father. 1222 01:08:33,720 --> 01:08:36,473 All right. This is pointless. 1223 01:08:36,560 --> 01:08:39,313 OK? It's time for plan B. 1224 01:08:41,760 --> 01:08:45,469 You might want to watch out that front window, Larry. 1225 01:08:45,560 --> 01:08:47,312 Son, this is what happens 1226 01:08:47,400 --> 01:08:49,550 when you fuck a stranger in the ass! 1227 01:08:50,880 --> 01:08:52,757 Little language problem here. 1228 01:08:52,840 --> 01:08:56,071 The little prick's stonewalling me. 1229 01:08:56,160 --> 01:08:57,832 Walter! 1230 01:08:57,920 --> 01:08:59,831 What... what are you doing, man? 1231 01:09:02,400 --> 01:09:03,913 What are you doing? 1232 01:09:05,480 --> 01:09:08,836 Here you go, Larry. You see what happens? 1233 01:09:08,920 --> 01:09:11,354 You see what happens, Larry? 1234 01:09:13,640 --> 01:09:15,392 This is what happens 1235 01:09:15,480 --> 01:09:18,552 when you fuck a stranger in the ass, Larry! 1236 01:09:19,600 --> 01:09:21,397 This is what happens, Larry! > 1237 01:09:21,480 --> 01:09:23,675 You see what happens, Larry, 1238 01:09:23,760 --> 01:09:26,149 when you fuck a stranger in the ass? 1239 01:09:26,240 --> 01:09:27,753 This is what happens. 1240 01:09:27,840 --> 01:09:29,512 You see what happens, Larry? 1241 01:09:29,600 --> 01:09:30,794 [Glass shattering] 1242 01:09:30,880 --> 01:09:32,711 You see what happens, Larry? 1243 01:09:32,800 --> 01:09:34,392 Do you see what happens, Larry, 1244 01:09:34,480 --> 01:09:36,675 when you fuck a stranger in the ass? 1245 01:09:37,800 --> 01:09:40,917 This is what happens, Larry! This is what happens, Larry! 1246 01:09:41,000 --> 01:09:43,150 - [Man] No! - This is what happens, Larry! 1247 01:09:43,240 --> 01:09:45,834 This is what happens when you fuck a stranger... 1248 01:09:45,920 --> 01:09:48,070 What the fuck are you doing? Stop it! 1249 01:09:48,160 --> 01:09:50,594 I just bought that fucking car last week! 1250 01:09:50,680 --> 01:09:53,672 - Whoa, whoa, whoa... - I'm gonna fuckin' kill you! 1251 01:09:53,760 --> 01:09:56,035 I just bought the fucking car last week! 1252 01:09:56,120 --> 01:09:58,588 I'll kill your fucking car, man! 1253 01:09:58,680 --> 01:10:00,318 No! That's not his... hey! 1254 01:10:00,400 --> 01:10:03,073 - God damn it! - No! Oh, no! 1255 01:10:03,160 --> 01:10:05,993 [Man] Fuck you! You like that? 1256 01:10:06,080 --> 01:10:09,117 Fuck you! I kill your fucking car! 1257 01:10:09,200 --> 01:10:12,397 I kill your fucking car! 1258 01:10:15,920 --> 01:10:18,832 [# Oye Como Va #] 1259 01:10:31,640 --> 01:10:33,710 I accept your apology. 1260 01:10:35,760 --> 01:10:39,469 No. I just... want to handle it by myself from now on. 1261 01:10:39,560 --> 01:10:41,835 No, no, no. 1262 01:10:41,920 --> 01:10:44,559 That has nothing to do with it. 1263 01:10:44,640 --> 01:10:47,074 Yes, the car made it home. 1264 01:10:47,160 --> 01:10:49,469 You're calling me at home. 1265 01:10:49,560 --> 01:10:54,953 No, Walter, it did not look like Larry was about to crack. 1266 01:10:56,520 --> 01:10:58,829 Well, that's your perception. 1267 01:11:00,000 --> 01:11:02,514 You know, Walter, you're right. 1268 01:11:02,600 --> 01:11:05,478 There is an unspoken message here. It's "Fuck you"! 1269 01:11:05,560 --> 01:11:07,596 Leave me the fuck alone! 1270 01:11:09,720 --> 01:11:11,995 Yeah, I'll be at practice. 1271 01:11:29,040 --> 01:11:32,191 Pin your diapers on. Jackie Treehorn wants to see you. 1272 01:11:32,280 --> 01:11:35,238 Jackie Treehorn knows which Lebowski you are. 1273 01:11:35,320 --> 01:11:37,880 Jackie Treehorn wants to see the deadbeat Lebowski. 1274 01:11:37,960 --> 01:11:39,757 You're not dealing with morons. 1275 01:11:40,600 --> 01:11:43,672 [Oriental music] 1276 01:12:25,360 --> 01:12:28,397 Hello, Dude. Thanks for coming. 1277 01:12:28,480 --> 01:12:30,471 I'm Jackie Treehorn. 1278 01:12:32,680 --> 01:12:35,672 This is quite a pad you got here, man. 1279 01:12:35,760 --> 01:12:38,069 Completely unspoiled. 1280 01:12:38,160 --> 01:12:41,152 - What's your drink, Dude? - White Russian. Thanks. 1281 01:12:41,240 --> 01:12:43,071 White Russian. 1282 01:12:43,160 --> 01:12:45,549 How's the smut business, Jackie? 1283 01:12:45,640 --> 01:12:47,278 I wouldn't know, Dude. 1284 01:12:47,360 --> 01:12:49,999 I deal in publishing, 1285 01:12:50,080 --> 01:12:52,196 entertainment, political advocacy. 1286 01:12:52,280 --> 01:12:55,750 - Oh. Which one's "Logjammin'"? - Yes, regrettably, it's true. 1287 01:12:55,840 --> 01:12:58,798 Standards have fallen in adult entertainment. 1288 01:12:58,880 --> 01:13:00,677 It's video, Dude. 1289 01:13:00,760 --> 01:13:03,194 Now that we're competing with amateurs, 1290 01:13:03,280 --> 01:13:05,999 we can't afford to invest in extras, like story, 1291 01:13:06,080 --> 01:13:08,275 production value, 1292 01:13:08,360 --> 01:13:10,351 feelings. 1293 01:13:11,280 --> 01:13:13,396 You know, people forget 1294 01:13:13,480 --> 01:13:17,029 that the brain is the biggest erogenous zone. 1295 01:13:17,120 --> 01:13:19,031 On you maybe. 1296 01:13:19,120 --> 01:13:21,111 You have to take the good with the bad. 1297 01:13:21,200 --> 01:13:23,998 New technology permits us to do exciting things 1298 01:13:24,080 --> 01:13:28,153 in interactive erotic software. Wave of the future, Dude. 1299 01:13:28,240 --> 01:13:30,595 100% electronic. 1300 01:13:30,680 --> 01:13:34,229 Hmm. Well... I still jerk off manually. 1301 01:13:35,560 --> 01:13:36,993 Of course you do. 1302 01:13:37,080 --> 01:13:40,516 I can see you're anxious for me to get to the point. 1303 01:13:40,600 --> 01:13:42,318 Well, here it is, Dude. 1304 01:13:42,400 --> 01:13:44,277 Where's Bunny? 1305 01:13:44,360 --> 01:13:47,477 - I thought you might know that. - Why would I? 1306 01:13:47,560 --> 01:13:51,348 She ran off to get away from that sizeable debt to me. 1307 01:13:51,440 --> 01:13:53,954 She didn't run off. She's been... 1308 01:13:54,040 --> 01:13:55,837 < I've heard that story. 1309 01:13:55,920 --> 01:13:59,117 I know you're mixed up in this, Dude. 1310 01:13:59,200 --> 01:14:02,636 I don't care what you're trying to get from the husband. 1311 01:14:02,720 --> 01:14:04,438 That's your business. 1312 01:14:04,520 --> 01:14:06,431 All I'm saying is... 1313 01:14:06,520 --> 01:14:08,750 - I want mine. - Yeah, right, man. 1314 01:14:08,840 --> 01:14:11,479 There are a lot of... facets to this, 1315 01:14:11,560 --> 01:14:14,313 a lot of interested parties. [Telephone rings] 1316 01:14:14,400 --> 01:14:16,914 Excuse me. 1317 01:14:21,920 --> 01:14:23,433 Yeah? 1318 01:14:23,520 --> 01:14:24,839 Oh, yeah. 1319 01:14:24,920 --> 01:14:26,433 < Where's that? 1320 01:14:29,240 --> 01:14:31,071 < All right. 1321 01:14:34,520 --> 01:14:36,238 Excuse me. 1322 01:15:00,800 --> 01:15:02,552 Oh. 1323 01:15:02,640 --> 01:15:04,437 [Door closes] 1324 01:15:09,760 --> 01:15:13,196 - Forgive me. - No problemo, man. 1325 01:15:13,280 --> 01:15:15,236 So, uh... 1326 01:15:15,320 --> 01:15:18,278 If I, uh, can find your money... 1327 01:15:18,360 --> 01:15:21,796 Uh, what's in it for the Dude? 1328 01:15:21,880 --> 01:15:24,348 Of course, there's that to discuss. Refill? 1329 01:15:24,440 --> 01:15:26,192 The Pope shit in the woods? 1330 01:15:26,280 --> 01:15:28,794 10% finder's fee. That all right? 1331 01:15:28,880 --> 01:15:31,440 Mmm. OK. Done, Jackie. 1332 01:15:31,520 --> 01:15:33,795 I dig the way you do business, man. 1333 01:15:33,880 --> 01:15:37,998 Your money is being held by a kid named Larry Sellers. 1334 01:15:38,080 --> 01:15:40,992 He lives in North Hollywood, on Radford, uh... 1335 01:15:41,080 --> 01:15:43,753 by the In 'n' Out Burger. 1336 01:15:43,840 --> 01:15:45,990 A fuckin' brat, 1337 01:15:46,080 --> 01:15:47,911 but I'm sure you can get it off him. 1338 01:15:48,000 --> 01:15:50,434 I mean, he's 15. 1339 01:15:51,400 --> 01:15:53,755 Flunking social studies. 1340 01:15:56,760 --> 01:15:58,990 So, if you could just, uh... 1341 01:15:59,080 --> 01:16:03,790 write me a cheque for my 10% of half a million... 1342 01:16:03,880 --> 01:16:06,678 five grand... I'll go out and mingle. 1343 01:16:11,000 --> 01:16:14,356 You mix a hell of a Caucasian, Jackie. 1344 01:16:14,520 --> 01:16:16,636 A 15-year-old kid. 1345 01:16:17,520 --> 01:16:20,159 < Is this some sort of a joke? [Voice echoes] 1346 01:16:20,240 --> 01:16:22,151 No, no joke. 1347 01:16:22,240 --> 01:16:25,755 No funny stuff, Jackie. The kid's got it. > 1348 01:16:25,840 --> 01:16:27,910 Hi, fellas. 1349 01:16:29,320 --> 01:16:31,595 The kid just wanted a car. 1350 01:16:34,320 --> 01:16:38,108 All the Dude ever wanted was his rug back. 1351 01:16:38,200 --> 01:16:39,474 I'm not greedy. > 1352 01:16:41,520 --> 01:16:43,750 It really... 1353 01:16:43,840 --> 01:16:45,478 tied the room together. 1354 01:16:48,320 --> 01:16:51,835 [The stranger] Darkness washed over the Dude. 1355 01:16:51,920 --> 01:16:54,434 Darker than a black steer's tookus 1356 01:16:54,520 --> 01:16:57,557 on a moonless prairie night. 1357 01:16:57,840 --> 01:16:59,398 There was no bottom. 1358 01:17:12,840 --> 01:17:16,150 # Yeah, yeah, oh, yeah 1359 01:17:16,240 --> 01:17:19,152 # What condition my condition was in 1360 01:17:20,560 --> 01:17:24,712 # I woke up this morning with the sun down 1361 01:17:24,800 --> 01:17:26,597 # Shinin' in 1362 01:17:28,640 --> 01:17:33,236 # I found my mind in a brown paper bag 1363 01:17:33,320 --> 01:17:35,197 # But then 1364 01:17:36,840 --> 01:17:40,799 # I tripped on a cloud and fell eight miles high 1365 01:17:40,880 --> 01:17:45,032 # I tore my mind on a jagged sky 1366 01:17:45,120 --> 01:17:46,792 # I just dropped in 1367 01:17:46,880 --> 01:17:50,714 # To see what condition my condition was in 1368 01:17:50,800 --> 01:17:53,109 # Yeah, yeah, oh, yeah 1369 01:17:53,200 --> 01:17:56,397 # What condition my condition was in 1370 01:18:02,360 --> 01:18:06,194 # I pushed my soul in a deep dark hole 1371 01:18:06,280 --> 01:18:09,078 # And then I followed it in 1372 01:18:11,040 --> 01:18:13,998 # I watched myself crawlin' out 1373 01:18:14,080 --> 01:18:17,993 # As I was crawlin' in 1374 01:18:18,080 --> 01:18:20,548 # I got up so tight 1375 01:18:20,640 --> 01:18:22,995 # I couldn't unwind 1376 01:18:23,080 --> 01:18:24,069 # I saw so much 1377 01:18:24,160 --> 01:18:26,879 # I broke my mind 1378 01:18:26,960 --> 01:18:28,791 # I just dropped in 1379 01:18:28,880 --> 01:18:32,759 # To see what condition my condition was in 1380 01:18:41,160 --> 01:18:43,390 # Yeah, yeah, oh, yeah 1381 01:18:43,480 --> 01:18:46,711 # What condition my condition was in 1382 01:18:52,160 --> 01:18:54,469 # Someone painted echoes on 1383 01:18:54,560 --> 01:18:56,596 # In big black letters 1384 01:18:56,680 --> 01:18:59,353 # On the dead inside 1385 01:19:00,000 --> 01:19:02,195 # I kept my foot on the gas 1386 01:19:02,280 --> 01:19:04,396 # As I left the road 1387 01:19:04,480 --> 01:19:07,790 # Blew out my mind 1388 01:19:07,880 --> 01:19:11,998 # Eight miles out of Memphis, and I got no spare 1389 01:19:12,080 --> 01:19:16,551 # Eight miles straightened up downtown somewhere 1390 01:19:16,640 --> 01:19:18,551 # I just dropped in 1391 01:19:18,640 --> 01:19:21,279 # To see what condition my condition was in 1392 01:19:23,760 --> 01:19:26,399 # I said, I just dropped in 1393 01:19:26,480 --> 01:19:30,632 # To see what condition my condition was in 1394 01:19:30,720 --> 01:19:33,553 # Yeah, yeah 1395 01:19:33,640 --> 01:19:35,790 # Oh, yeah # 1396 01:19:52,080 --> 01:19:54,878 Ah... ah... 1397 01:19:59,960 --> 01:20:01,552 Aaah... 1398 01:20:35,240 --> 01:20:38,630 # But the charge was true 1399 01:20:38,720 --> 01:20:42,508 # And they say he ran away # 1400 01:20:42,600 --> 01:20:44,431 Branded! 1401 01:20:57,640 --> 01:21:00,200 Is this your only I.D.? 1402 01:21:00,280 --> 01:21:02,430 I know my rights, man. > 1403 01:21:04,840 --> 01:21:08,799 - You don't know shit, Lebowski. - I want a fucking lawyer, man. 1404 01:21:08,880 --> 01:21:12,759 I want... Bill Kunstler, man... 1405 01:21:13,880 --> 01:21:15,518 or Ron Coobie. 1406 01:21:15,600 --> 01:21:17,272 Mr Treehorn tells us 1407 01:21:17,360 --> 01:21:21,353 that he had to eject you from his garden party, 1408 01:21:21,440 --> 01:21:23,351 that you were drunk and abusive. 1409 01:21:23,440 --> 01:21:28,468 Mr Treehorn treats objects like women, man. 1410 01:21:28,560 --> 01:21:31,632 Mr Treehorn draws a lot of water in this town. 1411 01:21:31,720 --> 01:21:33,950 You don't draw shit, Lebowski. 1412 01:21:34,040 --> 01:21:37,237 We got a nice quiet little beach community here, 1413 01:21:37,320 --> 01:21:39,550 and I aim to keep it nice and quiet. 1414 01:21:39,640 --> 01:21:41,631 So let me make something plain. 1415 01:21:41,720 --> 01:21:44,154 I don't like you sucking around, 1416 01:21:44,240 --> 01:21:46,151 bothering our citizens, Lebowski. 1417 01:21:46,240 --> 01:21:48,629 I don't like your jerk-off name, 1418 01:21:48,720 --> 01:21:50,438 I don't like your jerk-off face, 1419 01:21:50,520 --> 01:21:52,590 I don't like your jerk-off behaviour, 1420 01:21:52,680 --> 01:21:55,672 and I don't like you... Jerk-off. 1421 01:21:58,000 --> 01:21:59,991 Do I make myself clear? 1422 01:22:02,800 --> 01:22:05,075 I'm sorry. I wasn't listening. 1423 01:22:07,560 --> 01:22:09,516 Fucking fascist! 1424 01:22:10,560 --> 01:22:13,279 Stay out of Malibu, Lebowski! 1425 01:22:13,360 --> 01:22:15,635 Stay out of Malibu, deadbeat! 1426 01:22:17,200 --> 01:22:21,193 Keep your ugly goldbricking ass out of my beach community. 1427 01:22:21,320 --> 01:22:26,997 # I want to sleep with you in the desert tonight 1428 01:22:27,960 --> 01:22:32,909 # With a billion stars all around # 1429 01:22:33,000 --> 01:22:36,470 Jesus... Man, could you change the channel. 1430 01:22:36,560 --> 01:22:39,916 If you don't like my music, get your own fucking cab! 1431 01:22:40,000 --> 01:22:42,389 I'll pull over and kick your ass out. 1432 01:22:42,480 --> 01:22:46,075 I had a rough night, and I hate the fucking Eagles. 1433 01:22:54,160 --> 01:22:56,549 Out of my fucking cab! Out! Get... 1434 01:22:56,640 --> 01:22:58,710 Hey... man! 1435 01:22:58,800 --> 01:23:00,870 Man, hey! 1436 01:23:07,000 --> 01:23:09,753 [Loud music] 1437 01:23:16,520 --> 01:23:18,954 # Devil-may-care 1438 01:23:19,040 --> 01:23:22,157 # And I'm the devil with love to spare 1439 01:23:22,240 --> 01:23:25,391 # So viva Las Vegas 1440 01:23:25,480 --> 01:23:29,359 # Viva Las Vegas # 1441 01:23:41,000 --> 01:23:44,151 Oh... Jesus. 1442 01:24:01,600 --> 01:24:03,477 Jeffrey. 1443 01:24:04,480 --> 01:24:05,913 Maude? 1444 01:24:06,000 --> 01:24:07,877 Love me. 1445 01:24:09,240 --> 01:24:11,037 Uh, that's my robe. 1446 01:24:12,160 --> 01:24:15,197 [Maude] Tell me about yourself, Jeffrey. 1447 01:24:15,280 --> 01:24:17,555 Well, not much to tell. 1448 01:24:17,640 --> 01:24:22,395 I, um, I was one of the authors 1449 01:24:22,480 --> 01:24:24,596 of the Port Huron statement. 1450 01:24:24,680 --> 01:24:27,035 The original Port Huron statement. 1451 01:24:27,120 --> 01:24:28,599 Uh-huh. 1452 01:24:28,680 --> 01:24:32,389 Not the compromised second draft. 1453 01:24:32,840 --> 01:24:35,195 Uh, and then I, uh, 1454 01:24:35,280 --> 01:24:37,316 you ever hear of the Seattle 7? 1455 01:24:37,400 --> 01:24:40,710 That was me. 1456 01:24:40,800 --> 01:24:45,396 And, um, the six other guys. 1457 01:24:45,480 --> 01:24:49,393 Um... and then, ah, music business briefly. 1458 01:24:49,480 --> 01:24:51,038 Oh? 1459 01:24:51,120 --> 01:24:53,714 - Yeah, a roadie for Metallica. - Oh. 1460 01:24:53,800 --> 01:24:57,429 - "Speed of Sound" tour. - Mm-hmm. 1461 01:24:57,520 --> 01:24:59,875 Bunch of assholes. 1462 01:24:59,960 --> 01:25:02,520 Uh, and then, you know, 1463 01:25:02,600 --> 01:25:04,636 a little of this, a little of that. 1464 01:25:04,720 --> 01:25:07,996 My career's slowed down a little lately. 1465 01:25:08,080 --> 01:25:12,153 What do you do for recreation? 1466 01:25:12,240 --> 01:25:17,314 Oh, the usual. Bowl, drive around. 1467 01:25:17,400 --> 01:25:20,312 The occasional acid flashback. 1468 01:25:25,680 --> 01:25:28,353 What happened to your house? 1469 01:25:28,440 --> 01:25:30,431 < Oh, Jackie Treehorn trashed the place. 1470 01:25:30,520 --> 01:25:33,159 < He thought I had your father's money. 1471 01:25:33,240 --> 01:25:35,959 He got me out of the way while he looked for it. 1472 01:25:36,040 --> 01:25:38,508 - Cocktail? - No, thanks. 1473 01:25:38,600 --> 01:25:41,637 It's not my father's money. It's the Foundation's. 1474 01:25:41,720 --> 01:25:45,190 Why did he think you have it? And who does? 1475 01:25:45,280 --> 01:25:47,748 Larry Sellers, this high school kid. 1476 01:25:47,840 --> 01:25:49,353 Real fucking brat. 1477 01:25:49,440 --> 01:25:53,433 You know, this is a very complicated case, Maude. 1478 01:25:53,520 --> 01:25:56,432 Lotta ins, lotta outs. You know, fortunately, 1479 01:25:56,520 --> 01:25:58,909 I'm adhering to a pretty strict... 1480 01:25:59,000 --> 01:26:02,037 drug regiment to keep my mind, you know, 1481 01:26:02,120 --> 01:26:03,838 uh, limber, you know. 1482 01:26:03,920 --> 01:26:05,876 Very close to your father's money. 1483 01:26:05,960 --> 01:26:09,669 It's the Foundation's money. Father doesn't have any. 1484 01:26:11,480 --> 01:26:14,040 What are you talking about? He's loaded. 1485 01:26:14,120 --> 01:26:16,759 No, no, the wealth was all mother's. > 1486 01:26:16,840 --> 01:26:18,956 No, he runs stuff, uh... 1487 01:26:19,040 --> 01:26:22,316 We did let him run a company, but he didn't do very well. 1488 01:26:22,400 --> 01:26:25,278 - No, he's... - He administers the charities, 1489 01:26:25,360 --> 01:26:28,272 and I give him a reasonable allowance. 1490 01:26:28,360 --> 01:26:30,191 He has no money of his own. 1491 01:26:30,280 --> 01:26:33,590 I know how he presents himself. Father's weakness is vanity. 1492 01:26:33,680 --> 01:26:39,073 - Hence, the slut. - Uh, do you think he, uh... 1493 01:26:40,320 --> 01:26:42,311 What is that, yoga? 1494 01:26:42,400 --> 01:26:44,789 It increases the chances of conception. 1495 01:26:46,360 --> 01:26:48,510 - Increases? - Well, yes. 1496 01:26:48,600 --> 01:26:51,637 What did you think this was about? Fun and games? 1497 01:26:51,720 --> 01:26:54,029 I want a child. > 1498 01:26:54,120 --> 01:26:56,315 OK, yeah, OK, but let me... 1499 01:26:56,400 --> 01:26:59,631 Let me explain something about the Dude. 1500 01:26:59,720 --> 01:27:02,393 Look, Jeffrey, I don't want a partner. 1501 01:27:02,480 --> 01:27:06,234 I don't want the father to be someone I have to see, 1502 01:27:06,320 --> 01:27:10,154 or who has any interest in raising the child himself. 1503 01:27:10,240 --> 01:27:13,038 Oh, so that doctor... 1504 01:27:13,120 --> 01:27:15,031 Exactly. > 1505 01:27:15,120 --> 01:27:17,190 Now, what happened to your face? 1506 01:27:17,280 --> 01:27:19,919 Did Jackie Treehorn do that as well? 1507 01:27:20,000 --> 01:27:23,709 No, uh, it was the Chief of Police of Malibu. 1508 01:27:23,800 --> 01:27:27,236 A real reactionary. So, your father... 1509 01:27:28,840 --> 01:27:31,912 - Yeah, I get it. Yeah, yeah. - What? 1510 01:27:32,000 --> 01:27:34,275 Oh, man, my thinking about this case 1511 01:27:34,360 --> 01:27:38,069 had become very uptight. Yeah, your father. 1512 01:27:39,840 --> 01:27:42,308 Jeffrey, what are you talking about? 1513 01:27:42,400 --> 01:27:43,833 [Dialling phone] 1514 01:27:43,920 --> 01:27:45,399 Jeffrey! 1515 01:27:45,480 --> 01:27:47,471 Walter, if you're there, 1516 01:27:47,560 --> 01:27:49,835 pick up the fucking phone. Come on. 1517 01:27:49,920 --> 01:27:52,514 Pick it up, man, this is an emergency. 1518 01:27:52,600 --> 01:27:53,919 'Dude? ' 1519 01:27:54,000 --> 01:27:57,629 I'm at my place. I need you to come and pick me up. 1520 01:27:57,720 --> 01:28:00,109 'I can't drive, Dude, it's Erev Shabbos.' 1521 01:28:00,200 --> 01:28:01,872 - What? - 'Erev Shabbos.' 1522 01:28:01,960 --> 01:28:04,190 - 'I can't drive.' - Man! 1523 01:28:04,280 --> 01:28:06,840 'I'm not supposed to pick up the phone 1524 01:28:06,920 --> 01:28:09,559 - 'unless it's an emergency.' - This is a fucking emergency! 1525 01:28:09,640 --> 01:28:11,995 'That's why I picked up the phone.' 1526 01:28:12,080 --> 01:28:15,072 Walter, you fuck, we gotta go to Pasadena. 1527 01:28:15,160 --> 01:28:17,230 Pick me up or I'm off the bowling team. 1528 01:28:30,800 --> 01:28:32,870 [Engine doesn't start] 1529 01:28:32,960 --> 01:28:35,679 Get out of that fucking car, man. 1530 01:28:35,760 --> 01:28:38,354 Get out of that fucking car! 1531 01:28:38,440 --> 01:28:40,829 Get the fuck out of the car, man. 1532 01:28:42,240 --> 01:28:44,356 Get out of the fucking... 1533 01:28:44,440 --> 01:28:46,396 Who the fuck are you, man? 1534 01:28:46,480 --> 01:28:50,189 Easy, man. Relax, man. No physical harm intended. 1535 01:28:50,280 --> 01:28:53,192 Who the fuck are you? Why are you following me around? 1536 01:28:53,280 --> 01:28:54,474 Come on, fuckhead. 1537 01:28:54,560 --> 01:28:56,676 Relax, man. I'm a brother Seamus. 1538 01:28:56,760 --> 01:28:58,955 Brother Seamus? 1539 01:28:59,040 --> 01:29:01,474 Like an Irish monk? 1540 01:29:01,560 --> 01:29:04,120 What the fuck are you talking about? 1541 01:29:04,200 --> 01:29:07,795 My name is Da Fino. I'm a private snoop, like you, man. 1542 01:29:07,880 --> 01:29:10,633 - What? - A dick, man. 1543 01:29:10,720 --> 01:29:13,951 Let me tell you something. I dig your work. 1544 01:29:14,040 --> 01:29:15,917 Playing one side against the other. 1545 01:29:16,000 --> 01:29:18,355 In bed with everybody. Fabulous stuff. 1546 01:29:18,440 --> 01:29:19,839 I'm not...! Fuck it. 1547 01:29:19,920 --> 01:29:22,559 Just stay away from my lady friend. 1548 01:29:22,640 --> 01:29:25,029 I'm not messing with your special lady. 1549 01:29:25,120 --> 01:29:26,917 She's not my special lady. 1550 01:29:27,000 --> 01:29:28,991 I'm just helping her conceive. 1551 01:29:29,080 --> 01:29:31,389 - I'm not... - Who are you working for? 1552 01:29:31,480 --> 01:29:34,756 Lebowski? Jackie Treehorn? 1553 01:29:34,880 --> 01:29:36,552 The Knutsens. 1554 01:29:36,640 --> 01:29:40,758 The... who the fuck are the Knutsens? 1555 01:29:40,840 --> 01:29:44,196 The Knutsens. It's a wandering-daughter job. 1556 01:29:45,120 --> 01:29:47,918 Bunny Lebowski, man. 1557 01:29:48,000 --> 01:29:50,355 Her real name is Fawn Knutsen. 1558 01:29:50,440 --> 01:29:53,557 Her parents want her back. 1559 01:29:53,640 --> 01:29:55,949 Jesus fucking Christ. 1560 01:29:56,040 --> 01:29:58,110 Crazy, huh? Ran away about a year ago. 1561 01:29:58,200 --> 01:30:01,829 The Knutsens told me to show her this when I found her. 1562 01:30:01,920 --> 01:30:05,799 It's the family farm outside of Moorhead, Minnesota. 1563 01:30:05,880 --> 01:30:08,713 They think it'll make her homesick. 1564 01:30:08,800 --> 01:30:12,873 How are you gonna keep 'em down once they've seen Karl Hungus? 1565 01:30:12,960 --> 01:30:15,520 - She's been kidnapped, Da Fino. - Oh, man. 1566 01:30:15,600 --> 01:30:17,431 Maybe not, but she's not around. 1567 01:30:17,520 --> 01:30:21,957 Hey, maybe you and me could pool our resources. 1568 01:30:22,040 --> 01:30:25,953 Trade information. Professional courtesy. 1569 01:30:26,040 --> 01:30:28,076 Compeers, you know what I mean? 1570 01:30:28,160 --> 01:30:30,230 Yeah, yeah, I get it. Fuck off, Da Fino. 1571 01:30:30,320 --> 01:30:32,470 And stay away from my special... 1572 01:30:32,560 --> 01:30:35,279 from my fucking lady friend, man. 1573 01:30:37,200 --> 01:30:39,668 Ze lingonberry pancakes. 1574 01:30:42,080 --> 01:30:43,559 [Speaks German] 1575 01:30:43,640 --> 01:30:45,631 Lingonberry pancakes. 1576 01:30:49,160 --> 01:30:51,435 Sree pigs in blanket. 1577 01:30:51,520 --> 01:30:53,829 [Speaks German] 1578 01:30:53,920 --> 01:30:55,478 [Dieter] Huh? 1579 01:30:55,560 --> 01:30:57,198 [Speaks German] 1580 01:30:57,280 --> 01:30:59,240 She has lingonberry pancakes. 1581 01:30:59,240 --> 01:31:01,629 [All speaking German] 1582 01:31:06,760 --> 01:31:09,115 < We totally fucked it up, man. 1583 01:31:09,200 --> 01:31:12,715 We fucked up his payoff, we pissed off the kidnappers, 1584 01:31:12,800 --> 01:31:16,509 and Lebowski, he yelled at me but he didn't do anything, huh? 1585 01:31:16,600 --> 01:31:19,194 Well, sometimes it's a cathartic... 1586 01:31:19,280 --> 01:31:21,271 If he knows I'm a fuck-up, 1587 01:31:21,360 --> 01:31:24,158 why does he ask me to get his wife back? 1588 01:31:24,240 --> 01:31:26,674 Because he doesn't want her back. 1589 01:31:26,760 --> 01:31:29,797 He's had enough. He no longer digs her. 1590 01:31:29,880 --> 01:31:32,758 But then, why doesn't he give a shit 1591 01:31:32,840 --> 01:31:34,592 about his million bucks? 1592 01:31:34,680 --> 01:31:37,558 I mean, he knows we never handed off his briefcase, 1593 01:31:37,640 --> 01:31:39,312 but he never asked for it back. 1594 01:31:39,400 --> 01:31:42,551 The million bucks was never in the briefcase. 1595 01:31:42,640 --> 01:31:45,837 The briefcase was fucking empty, man. 1596 01:31:45,920 --> 01:31:48,912 The asshole was hoping that they would kill her. 1597 01:31:49,000 --> 01:31:51,639 You threw out a ringer for a ringer. 1598 01:31:51,720 --> 01:31:53,915 [Walter] How does this add up to an emergency? 1599 01:31:54,000 --> 01:31:55,433 Huh? 1600 01:31:55,520 --> 01:31:57,988 I see what you're getting at, Dude, 1601 01:31:58,080 --> 01:32:00,799 he kept the money. My point is... 1602 01:32:00,880 --> 01:32:05,351 here we are, it's Shabbos, which I'm allowed to break 1603 01:32:05,440 --> 01:32:08,238 only if it's a matter of life or death. 1604 01:32:08,320 --> 01:32:10,550 Come off it. You're not even fucking Jewish. 1605 01:32:10,640 --> 01:32:12,995 What the fuck are you talking about? 1606 01:32:13,080 --> 01:32:14,991 You're fucking Polish-Catholic. 1607 01:32:15,080 --> 01:32:17,389 I converted when I married Cynthia. Come on. 1608 01:32:17,480 --> 01:32:19,994 - Yeah, yeah. - You know this. 1609 01:32:20,080 --> 01:32:22,469 Five years ago, you were divorced. 1610 01:32:22,560 --> 01:32:25,028 So when you get divorced, you return your library card? 1611 01:32:25,120 --> 01:32:27,714 You get a new licence? You stop being Jewish? 1612 01:32:27,800 --> 01:32:31,509 - This is the driveway. - I'm Jewish as fucking Tevy�. 1613 01:32:31,600 --> 01:32:35,115 Man, it's all a part of your sick Cynthia thing. 1614 01:32:35,200 --> 01:32:38,909 Taking care of her fucking dog. Going to her fucking synagogue. 1615 01:32:39,000 --> 01:32:40,479 You're living in the past. 1616 01:32:40,560 --> 01:32:42,391 3,000 years of beautiful tradition 1617 01:32:42,480 --> 01:32:44,277 from Moses to Sandy Koufax, 1618 01:32:44,360 --> 01:32:49,036 damn right I'm living in the fucking past! I... Jesus. 1619 01:32:49,120 --> 01:32:51,509 What the hell happened? 1620 01:32:52,520 --> 01:32:56,752 # Viva Las Vegas 1621 01:32:56,840 --> 01:32:59,912 # Viva Las Vegas # 1622 01:33:08,440 --> 01:33:10,510 Ah! 1623 01:33:10,600 --> 01:33:12,272 Where was she, man? 1624 01:33:12,360 --> 01:33:14,271 Visiting friends in Palm Springs. 1625 01:33:14,360 --> 01:33:16,476 She just left. Never bothered to tell us. 1626 01:33:16,560 --> 01:33:19,199 I guess the nihilist knew where she was. 1627 01:33:19,280 --> 01:33:20,998 She never even kidnapped herself. 1628 01:33:21,080 --> 01:33:24,868 - Who is this gentleman, Dude? - Who am I? A fucking veteran. 1629 01:33:24,960 --> 01:33:27,599 You shouldn't go in, Dude. He's very angry. 1630 01:33:30,280 --> 01:33:32,236 So, man... 1631 01:33:32,320 --> 01:33:35,710 So, she's back, no thanks to you. 1632 01:33:35,800 --> 01:33:38,553 - Where's the fucking money? - A million bucks 1633 01:33:38,640 --> 01:33:42,394 from fucking needy little urban achievers! You are scum! 1634 01:33:42,480 --> 01:33:44,755 - Who the hell is he? - Who am I? 1635 01:33:44,840 --> 01:33:47,991 I'm the guy that's gonna kick your goldbricking ass! 1636 01:33:48,080 --> 01:33:51,629 The briefcase was empty. You kept the money for yourself. 1637 01:33:51,720 --> 01:33:53,631 You have your story, I have mine. 1638 01:33:53,720 --> 01:33:56,359 I entrusted the money to you, and you stole it. 1639 01:33:56,440 --> 01:33:59,716 As if we would ever take your bullshit money! 1640 01:33:59,800 --> 01:34:03,315 You thought Bunny had been kidnapped, and you were glad. 1641 01:34:03,400 --> 01:34:05,550 You could make some money disappear. > 1642 01:34:05,640 --> 01:34:08,200 You needed was a sap to pin it on. 1643 01:34:08,280 --> 01:34:11,989 You just met me. You... human paraquat! 1644 01:34:12,080 --> 01:34:14,196 You figured, "Oh, here's a loser." 1645 01:34:14,280 --> 01:34:17,477 Somebody the square community won't give a shit about. 1646 01:34:17,560 --> 01:34:21,758 - Well, aren't you? - Well, yeah, but... 1647 01:34:23,000 --> 01:34:24,399 Get out, both of you. 1648 01:34:24,480 --> 01:34:27,756 Look at that phoney. Pretending to be a millionaire. 1649 01:34:27,840 --> 01:34:29,671 Out of this house now, you bums! 1650 01:34:29,760 --> 01:34:31,398 Let me tell you something. 1651 01:34:31,480 --> 01:34:33,755 I've seen a lot of spinals, Dude, 1652 01:34:33,840 --> 01:34:37,196 and this guy's a fake. A fucking goldbricker. 1653 01:34:37,280 --> 01:34:40,431 - Stay away from me! - This guy fucking walks. 1654 01:34:40,520 --> 01:34:43,353 - I've never been more certain. - Stay away! 1655 01:34:43,440 --> 01:34:46,637 Walter, for Christ's sake, man, he's a cripple. 1656 01:34:46,720 --> 01:34:48,551 Get away from me! 1657 01:34:48,640 --> 01:34:50,232 Aah! 1658 01:34:50,320 --> 01:34:53,471 - Put him down, man! - Yeah, I'll put him down! 1659 01:34:53,560 --> 01:34:55,596 Rauss! Achtung, baby! 1660 01:34:58,120 --> 01:35:00,429 [Dog barking] 1661 01:35:02,640 --> 01:35:05,234 [Lebowski whimpers] 1662 01:35:11,120 --> 01:35:14,237 Come on, help me put him back in his chair. 1663 01:35:33,480 --> 01:35:35,755 Sure, you'll see some tank battles. 1664 01:35:35,840 --> 01:35:38,434 Fighting in desert is VERY different 1665 01:35:38,520 --> 01:35:42,433 from fighting in jungle. 'Nam was a foot soldier's war, 1666 01:35:42,520 --> 01:35:46,433 whereas this thing should, you know, be a piece of cake. 1667 01:35:46,520 --> 01:35:50,195 I mean, I had an M16 Jacko, not an Abrams fucking tank. 1668 01:35:50,280 --> 01:35:52,589 Me and Charlie, eyeball to eyeball. 1669 01:35:52,680 --> 01:35:55,319 - Yeah. - That's fuckin' combat. 1670 01:35:55,400 --> 01:35:57,960 The man in the black pyjamas, Dude. 1671 01:35:58,040 --> 01:36:00,349 Worthy fuckin' adversary. 1672 01:36:00,440 --> 01:36:03,830 - Who's in pyjamas, Walter? - Shut the fuck up, Donny. 1673 01:36:03,920 --> 01:36:05,797 Whereas, what we have here... 1674 01:36:05,880 --> 01:36:08,235 Fig-eaters wearing towels on their heads, 1675 01:36:08,320 --> 01:36:10,515 trying to find reverse on a Soviet tank. 1676 01:36:10,600 --> 01:36:12,795 - This... this is not a worthy... - Hey! 1677 01:36:12,880 --> 01:36:15,110 What's this day-of-rest shit? 1678 01:36:15,200 --> 01:36:18,033 What's this bullshit?! I don't fuckin' care! 1679 01:36:18,120 --> 01:36:21,635 It don't matter to Jesus. But you not fooling me, man. 1680 01:36:21,720 --> 01:36:23,836 You might fool the league office, 1681 01:36:23,920 --> 01:36:26,354 but you don't fool Jesus. 1682 01:36:26,440 --> 01:36:28,954 It's bush league psyche-out stuff. 1683 01:36:29,040 --> 01:36:31,315 Laughable, man. 1684 01:36:31,400 --> 01:36:34,517 I would have fucked you in the ass Saturday. 1685 01:36:34,600 --> 01:36:38,434 I'll fuck you in the ass next Wednesday instead. 1686 01:36:38,520 --> 01:36:42,479 Whoo! You got a date Wednesday, baby. 1687 01:36:45,840 --> 01:36:47,910 He's cracking. 1688 01:36:48,640 --> 01:36:49,834 The whole concept of Asia. 1689 01:36:49,920 --> 01:36:52,070 Many learned men have disputed this, 1690 01:36:52,160 --> 01:36:55,277 but in the 14th Century, the Rabahm, he... 1691 01:36:56,240 --> 01:36:59,118 [Technopop] 1692 01:37:03,680 --> 01:37:05,875 Well, they finally did it. 1693 01:37:05,960 --> 01:37:08,076 They killed my fucking car. 1694 01:37:08,160 --> 01:37:11,789 We want ze money, Lebowski. 1695 01:37:11,880 --> 01:37:14,030 Ja, otherwise, we kill ze girl. 1696 01:37:14,120 --> 01:37:17,476 Ja, it seems you have forgotten our little deal. 1697 01:37:17,560 --> 01:37:20,279 You don't have the fucking girl, dipshit. 1698 01:37:20,360 --> 01:37:22,920 < We know you never did. 1699 01:37:23,000 --> 01:37:24,592 Are these the Nazis? 1700 01:37:24,680 --> 01:37:26,796 No, nihilists. Nothing to be afraid of. 1701 01:37:28,640 --> 01:37:32,076 Ve don't care. Ve still want the money, Lebowski, 1702 01:37:32,160 --> 01:37:34,230 or we'll fuck you up. 1703 01:37:34,320 --> 01:37:36,914 Fuck you. Fuck the three of yous. 1704 01:37:37,000 --> 01:37:40,470 No, without a hostage, there is no ransom. 1705 01:37:40,560 --> 01:37:43,632 That's what ransom is. Those are the fucking rules. 1706 01:37:43,720 --> 01:37:45,870 His girlfriend gave up her toe. 1707 01:37:45,960 --> 01:37:48,474 She zought we'd be getting $1 million. 1708 01:37:48,560 --> 01:37:49,754 It's not fair. 1709 01:37:49,840 --> 01:37:52,798 Fair? Who's the fucking nihilist around here, 1710 01:37:52,880 --> 01:37:54,871 you bunch of fucking crybabies. 1711 01:37:54,960 --> 01:37:58,873 Cool it, Walter. Hey, look, pal, there never was any money. 1712 01:37:58,960 --> 01:38:01,190 < The big Lebowski gave me an empty briefcase, 1713 01:38:01,280 --> 01:38:03,032 so take it up with him, man. 1714 01:38:03,120 --> 01:38:05,429 I would like my undies back. 1715 01:38:05,520 --> 01:38:08,637 - Are these guys gonna hurt us? - No, these men are cowards. 1716 01:38:08,720 --> 01:38:11,917 OK, so we take ze money you have on you 1717 01:38:12,000 --> 01:38:13,877 and we calls it even. 1718 01:38:14,640 --> 01:38:16,392 Fuck you. 1719 01:38:16,480 --> 01:38:19,790 No, Walter, come on. We're ending this cheap, man. 1720 01:38:19,880 --> 01:38:22,633 - No, what's mine is mine. - Come on, Walter. 1721 01:38:22,720 --> 01:38:26,633 - [Dieter] No funny stuff. - All right, I got... 1722 01:38:26,720 --> 01:38:29,553 - uh, 4 bucks, almost 5. - I got $18. 1723 01:38:29,640 --> 01:38:31,551 [Walter] What's mine is mine. 1724 01:38:31,640 --> 01:38:34,154 We fuck you up, man. We takes the money. 1725 01:38:34,240 --> 01:38:36,549 Come and get it. 1726 01:38:37,160 --> 01:38:39,355 [Dieter] We fuck you up. 1727 01:38:39,440 --> 01:38:41,317 Show me what you got, nihilist. 1728 01:38:41,400 --> 01:38:42,833 I fuck you. 1729 01:38:42,920 --> 01:38:44,433 Come on, he's got a sword. 1730 01:38:44,520 --> 01:38:46,272 Dipshit with a nine-toed woman. 1731 01:38:46,360 --> 01:38:49,432 Fuck you! Fuck you! 1732 01:38:49,520 --> 01:38:51,078 I fuck you, I...! 1733 01:38:56,200 --> 01:38:58,191 Take it easy, man. Here's the $4. 1734 01:39:04,320 --> 01:39:06,231 I got a fucking ball, man. 1735 01:39:11,720 --> 01:39:13,756 Anti-Semite! 1736 01:39:13,840 --> 01:39:15,910 < I fuck you in ze ass. 1737 01:39:16,000 --> 01:39:19,356 I fuck you! I fuck you! 1738 01:39:19,440 --> 01:39:20,998 I fuck you! I fuck you! 1739 01:39:27,200 --> 01:39:29,236 We got a man down, Dude. 1740 01:39:32,520 --> 01:39:34,636 God, they shot him, man. 1741 01:39:34,720 --> 01:39:36,597 - No, Dude. - They shot Donny? 1742 01:39:36,680 --> 01:39:39,717 There weren't any shots fired. It's a heart attack. 1743 01:39:39,800 --> 01:39:42,075 Call the medics, Dude. 1744 01:39:42,160 --> 01:39:45,550 I'd go myself, but I'm pumping blood. Might pass out. 1745 01:39:45,640 --> 01:39:49,110 Rest easy, good buddy, you're doing fine. 1746 01:39:49,200 --> 01:39:51,270 We got help choppering in. 1747 01:39:59,680 --> 01:40:02,035 [Footsteps] 1748 01:40:16,920 --> 01:40:19,593 Hello, gentlemen. You are the bereaved? 1749 01:40:19,680 --> 01:40:21,432 Yeah, man. 1750 01:40:21,520 --> 01:40:23,476 Francis Donnelly. Pleased to meet you. 1751 01:40:23,560 --> 01:40:25,039 Jeff Lebowski. 1752 01:40:25,120 --> 01:40:26,633 Walter Sobchak. 1753 01:40:26,720 --> 01:40:29,280 The Dude, actually, is, uh... 1754 01:40:29,360 --> 01:40:31,874 - Excuse me? - Oh, nothing. 1755 01:40:31,960 --> 01:40:37,432 Yes, I understand you're taking away the remains. 1756 01:40:37,520 --> 01:40:38,999 Yeah. 1757 01:40:39,080 --> 01:40:41,469 We have the urn. 1758 01:40:41,560 --> 01:40:44,757 I assume this is credit card. 1759 01:40:45,840 --> 01:40:47,239 Yeah. 1760 01:40:56,600 --> 01:40:58,158 [Walter] Ahem. 1761 01:41:00,880 --> 01:41:03,075 What's this? 1762 01:41:03,160 --> 01:41:04,957 That's for the urn. 1763 01:41:05,040 --> 01:41:07,349 Don't need it. We're scattering the ashes. 1764 01:41:07,440 --> 01:41:09,396 Yes, so we were informed. 1765 01:41:09,480 --> 01:41:11,755 However, we must, of course, 1766 01:41:11,840 --> 01:41:14,912 transmit the remains to you in a receptacle. 1767 01:41:16,200 --> 01:41:18,111 This is $180. 1768 01:41:18,200 --> 01:41:21,954 It is our most... modestly priced receptacle. 1769 01:41:22,040 --> 01:41:24,395 - Can we just, uh... - $180? 1770 01:41:24,480 --> 01:41:28,268 - They range up to 3,000. - Uh, we're, uh, ahem... 1771 01:41:28,360 --> 01:41:30,396 Can't we just rent it from you? 1772 01:41:30,480 --> 01:41:33,119 Sir, this is a mortuary, not a rental house. 1773 01:41:33,200 --> 01:41:34,679 < We're scattering the ashes! 1774 01:41:34,760 --> 01:41:37,718 Just because we're bereaved, doesn't make us saps! 1775 01:41:37,800 --> 01:41:40,439 Sir, please, lower your voices. 1776 01:41:40,520 --> 01:41:42,476 Man, don't you have, you know, 1777 01:41:42,560 --> 01:41:46,155 something else we could put him in, you know? 1778 01:41:46,240 --> 01:41:48,708 That is our most... modestly priced receptacle. 1779 01:41:48,800 --> 01:41:50,279 Goddamn it! 1780 01:41:51,960 --> 01:41:54,076 Is there a Ralph's around here? 1781 01:42:19,640 --> 01:42:23,189 Donny was a good bowler and a good man. 1782 01:42:23,280 --> 01:42:25,475 He was one of us. 1783 01:42:25,560 --> 01:42:29,712 He was a man who loved the outdoors... and bowling. 1784 01:42:29,800 --> 01:42:31,950 As a surfer, he explored the beaches 1785 01:42:32,040 --> 01:42:33,837 of Southern California, 1786 01:42:33,920 --> 01:42:38,914 from La Jolla to Leo Carrillo and up to Pismo. 1787 01:42:39,000 --> 01:42:43,710 He died... he died as so many men of his generation, 1788 01:42:43,800 --> 01:42:45,518 before his time. 1789 01:42:45,600 --> 01:42:48,592 In your wisdom, Lord, you took him. 1790 01:42:48,680 --> 01:42:52,036 As you took so many bright, flowering young men 1791 01:42:52,120 --> 01:42:57,319 at Khe Sanh, at Lan Doc, and Hill 364. 1792 01:42:57,400 --> 01:42:59,675 These young men gave their lives. 1793 01:42:59,760 --> 01:43:01,876 So did Donny. 1794 01:43:03,560 --> 01:43:06,438 Donny who loved bowling. 1795 01:43:08,040 --> 01:43:10,508 And so... 1796 01:43:10,600 --> 01:43:13,353 Theodore Donald Karabotsos, 1797 01:43:13,440 --> 01:43:17,956 in accordance with what we think 1798 01:43:18,040 --> 01:43:20,270 your dying wishes might well have been, 1799 01:43:20,360 --> 01:43:24,069 we commit your final, mortal remains 1800 01:43:24,160 --> 01:43:27,869 to the bosom of the Pacific Ocean, 1801 01:43:27,960 --> 01:43:30,713 which you loved so well. 1802 01:43:32,440 --> 01:43:34,317 Goodnight, sweet prince. 1803 01:43:48,000 --> 01:43:50,116 Shit. 1804 01:43:51,840 --> 01:43:54,673 Oh, shit, Dude, I'm sorry. 1805 01:43:55,360 --> 01:43:58,750 - Goddamn wind. - Goddamn it, Walter. 1806 01:43:58,840 --> 01:44:01,149 - You fucking asshole! - Dude, I'm sorry. 1807 01:44:01,240 --> 01:44:03,595 Everything's a fucking travesty with you. 1808 01:44:03,680 --> 01:44:05,318 Sorry. It was an accident. 1809 01:44:05,400 --> 01:44:07,072 What was that shit about Vietnam? 1810 01:44:07,160 --> 01:44:10,391 What does anything have to do with Vietnam? 1811 01:44:10,480 --> 01:44:12,232 What the fuck were you talking about? 1812 01:44:12,320 --> 01:44:14,197 Dude, I'm sorry. 1813 01:44:16,000 --> 01:44:18,150 Fuckin'... 1814 01:44:23,560 --> 01:44:25,710 Fuck, Walter. 1815 01:44:26,320 --> 01:44:30,996 Come on, Dude. Hey, fuck it, man. 1816 01:44:34,560 --> 01:44:36,994 Let's go bowling. 1817 01:44:58,520 --> 01:45:02,354 # And when you're sitting there 1818 01:45:02,440 --> 01:45:06,592 # In your silk upholstered chair 1819 01:45:06,680 --> 01:45:10,958 # Talkin' to some rich folks that you know 1820 01:45:14,040 --> 01:45:17,271 # Well, I hope you don't see me 1821 01:45:17,360 --> 01:45:21,194 # In my ragged company 1822 01:45:21,280 --> 01:45:26,718 # Aw, that you know I could never be alone # 1823 01:45:28,320 --> 01:45:30,197 Two oat sodas, Gary. 1824 01:45:30,280 --> 01:45:32,635 - [Gary] Good luck tomorrow. - Yeah, thanks, man. 1825 01:45:32,720 --> 01:45:34,870 I'm sorry to hear about Donny. 1826 01:45:34,960 --> 01:45:38,191 Oh, well, yeah, you know, 1827 01:45:38,280 --> 01:45:41,590 sometimes you eat the bar and sometimes, you know... 1828 01:45:41,680 --> 01:45:43,511 Hey, man! 1829 01:45:43,600 --> 01:45:45,477 Howdy doo, Dude. 1830 01:45:45,560 --> 01:45:47,915 I wondered if I'd see you again. 1831 01:45:48,000 --> 01:45:51,276 I wouldn't miss the semis. How have things been going? 1832 01:45:51,360 --> 01:45:54,158 Strikes and gutters, ups and downs. 1833 01:45:54,240 --> 01:45:57,516 - Sure. I gotcha. - Yeah. 1834 01:45:57,600 --> 01:45:59,431 Thanks, Gary. 1835 01:45:59,520 --> 01:46:02,080 Well, take care, man. Gotta get back. 1836 01:46:02,160 --> 01:46:04,674 - Sure. Take it easy, Dude. - Oh, yeah. 1837 01:46:04,760 --> 01:46:06,751 I know that you will. 1838 01:46:06,840 --> 01:46:10,674 Yeah, well, the Dude abides. 1839 01:46:16,160 --> 01:46:19,152 The Dude abides. 1840 01:46:21,840 --> 01:46:26,311 I don't know about you, but I take comfort in that. 1841 01:46:26,400 --> 01:46:30,234 It's good knowing he's out there, the Dude. 1842 01:46:30,320 --> 01:46:33,278 Takin' her easy for all us sinners. 1843 01:46:33,360 --> 01:46:35,430 Shoosh. 1844 01:46:35,520 --> 01:46:38,671 I sure hope he makes the finals. 1845 01:46:38,760 --> 01:46:43,311 Well, that about does her. Wraps her all up. 1846 01:46:43,400 --> 01:46:48,030 Things seem to have worked out good for the Dude and Walter. 1847 01:46:48,120 --> 01:46:51,669 It was a pretty good story, don't you think? 1848 01:46:51,760 --> 01:46:54,718 Made me laugh to beat the band. 1849 01:46:54,800 --> 01:46:56,995 Parts, anyway. 1850 01:46:57,080 --> 01:47:00,356 I didn't like seeing Donny go. 1851 01:47:00,440 --> 01:47:03,000 But then I happen to know 1852 01:47:03,080 --> 01:47:06,436 that there's a little Lebowski on the way. 1853 01:47:06,520 --> 01:47:10,195 I guess that's how the whole darn human comedy 1854 01:47:10,280 --> 01:47:13,238 keeps perpetuating itself 1855 01:47:13,320 --> 01:47:15,993 down through the generations. 1856 01:47:16,080 --> 01:47:17,991 Westward the wagons, 1857 01:47:18,080 --> 01:47:21,038 across the sands of time until we... 1858 01:47:21,120 --> 01:47:23,076 Oh, look at me. 1859 01:47:23,160 --> 01:47:25,754 I'm ramblin' again. 1860 01:47:25,840 --> 01:47:28,400 Well, I hope you folks enjoyed yourselves. 1861 01:47:28,480 --> 01:47:31,358 Catch ya later on down the trail. 1862 01:47:31,440 --> 01:47:35,592 Say, friend, you got any more of that good Sarsaparilla? 1863 01:47:56,400 --> 01:48:02,839 # Take me down, little Susie, take me down 1864 01:48:05,320 --> 01:48:10,758 # I know you think you're the queen of the underground 1865 01:48:13,560 --> 01:48:18,315 # Send me dead flowers every morning 1866 01:48:21,640 --> 01:48:26,316 # Send me dead flowers by the mail 1867 01:48:29,720 --> 01:48:34,475 # Send me dead flowers to my wedding 1868 01:48:36,480 --> 01:48:44,160 # And I won't forget to put roses on your grave 1869 01:48:44,240 --> 01:48:53,876 # No, I won't forget to put roses on your grave # 1870 01:49:16,520 --> 01:49:22,038 # Bright light city gonna set my soul 1871 01:49:22,120 --> 01:49:25,749 # Set my soul on fire 1872 01:49:25,840 --> 01:49:31,517 # Got a whole lotta money that's ready to burn 1873 01:49:31,600 --> 01:49:36,230 # So get those stakes up higher 1874 01:49:36,320 --> 01:49:38,834 # There's a thousand pretty women 1875 01:49:38,920 --> 01:49:41,798 # Waitin' out there 1876 01:49:41,880 --> 01:49:46,271 # They're all livin' devil-may-care 1877 01:49:46,360 --> 01:49:51,070 # And I'm just the devil with love to spare 1878 01:49:51,160 --> 01:49:56,553 # So viva Las Vegas 1879 01:49:56,640 --> 01:50:00,872 # Viva Las Vegas 1880 01:50:03,520 --> 01:50:08,992 # Viva Las Vegas with the neon flashin' 1881 01:50:09,080 --> 01:50:11,275 # And your one-armed bandits crashin' 1882 01:50:11,360 --> 01:50:15,319 # All those hopes down the drain 1883 01:50:15,400 --> 01:50:21,475 # Viva Las Vegas turnin' day into night-time 1884 01:50:21,560 --> 01:50:24,199 # Night into daytime 1885 01:50:24,280 --> 01:50:26,157 # If you see it once 1886 01:50:26,240 --> 01:50:32,270 # You'll never be the same again 1887 01:50:34,480 --> 01:50:36,311 # I'm gonna keep on 1888 01:50:36,400 --> 01:50:38,914 # Keep on the run 1889 01:50:39,000 --> 01:50:42,993 # If it costs me my very last dime 1890 01:50:43,080 --> 01:50:46,197 # If I wind up broke 1891 01:50:46,280 --> 01:50:48,475 # Well, I'll always remember 1892 01:50:48,560 --> 01:50:53,793 # That I had a swinging time 1893 01:50:53,880 --> 01:50:58,795 # I'm gonna give it everything I've got 1894 01:50:58,880 --> 01:51:03,271 # Lady Luck, please let the dice stay hot 1895 01:51:03,360 --> 01:51:08,878 # Let me shoot a seven with every shot 1896 01:51:08,960 --> 01:51:12,236 # Viva Las Vegas 1897 01:51:13,600 --> 01:51:17,070 # Viva Las Vegas 1898 01:51:17,960 --> 01:51:22,431 # Viva Las Vegas 1899 01:51:23,840 --> 01:51:27,594 # Viva, viva 1900 01:51:27,680 --> 01:51:34,358 # Viva, viva 1901 01:51:34,440 --> 01:51:40,913 # Las Vegas 1902 01:51:45,040 --> 01:51:49,238 # Viva # 1903 01:52:01,800 --> 01:52:06,999 DVD subtitles by European Captioning Institute