1 00:01:47,557 --> 00:01:50,151 Do you consider the book to be autobiographical? 2 00:01:51,594 --> 00:01:53,653 Well, I mean... 3 00:01:53,830 --> 00:01:56,663 ...isn't everything autobiographical? 4 00:01:56,833 --> 00:02:01,293 I mean, we all see the world through our own tiny keyhole, right? 5 00:02:01,504 --> 00:02:03,404 I mean, I always think of Thomas Wolfe. 6 00:02:03,606 --> 00:02:06,871 Have you ever seen that little one-page "Note to Reader"... 7 00:02:07,043 --> 00:02:09,170 ...in the front of Look Homeward, Angel? 8 00:02:09,946 --> 00:02:14,883 Anyway, he says that we are the sum of all the moments of our lives... 9 00:02:15,051 --> 00:02:18,851 ...and anybody who sits down to write will use the clay of their own life... 10 00:02:19,022 --> 00:02:20,546 ...that you can't avoid that. 11 00:02:20,723 --> 00:02:25,626 So when I look at my own life, I have to admit, right, that l... 12 00:02:25,929 --> 00:02:30,423 I've never been around a bunch of guns or violence, you know, not really. 13 00:02:30,633 --> 00:02:34,569 No political intrigue or a helicopter crash, right? 14 00:02:35,205 --> 00:02:39,266 But my life, from my own point of view, has been full of drama, right? 15 00:02:39,909 --> 00:02:42,377 And so I thought, if I could write a book... 16 00:02:42,579 --> 00:02:46,982 ...that could capture what it's like to really meet somebody... 17 00:02:47,217 --> 00:02:49,879 One of the most exciting things that's happened to me... 18 00:02:50,053 --> 00:02:52,351 ...is to meet somebody, make that connection. 19 00:02:52,555 --> 00:02:56,582 And if I could make that valuable, you know, to capture that... 20 00:02:57,260 --> 00:03:00,559 ...that would be the attempt, or... 21 00:03:01,097 --> 00:03:03,588 Did I answer your question? 22 00:03:04,167 --> 00:03:06,601 I'll try to be more specific. 23 00:03:07,070 --> 00:03:09,766 Was there ever a French young woman on a train you met... 24 00:03:09,939 --> 00:03:12,271 ...and spent an evening with? 25 00:03:16,145 --> 00:03:19,080 See, to me, that... I mean... 26 00:03:19,249 --> 00:03:22,685 ...that's not important, you know? - So that's a yes? 27 00:03:23,620 --> 00:03:27,613 All right, since I'm in France and this is the last stop of my book tour, yes. 28 00:03:28,424 --> 00:03:30,255 Thank you. 29 00:03:30,426 --> 00:03:33,827 Mr. Wallace, the book ends on an ambiguous note. 30 00:03:33,997 --> 00:03:35,328 We don't know. 31 00:03:35,531 --> 00:03:38,125 Do you think they get back together in six months... 32 00:03:38,401 --> 00:03:41,768 ...like they promise each other? 33 00:03:42,405 --> 00:03:44,305 Like they promised? 34 00:03:45,909 --> 00:03:48,605 I think how you answer that, you know, is... 35 00:03:49,445 --> 00:03:52,710 It's a good test, right, if you're a romantic or a cynic. 36 00:03:52,949 --> 00:03:56,942 Right? I mean, you think they get back together, right? 37 00:03:57,120 --> 00:03:58,644 - You don't, for sure. - No. 38 00:03:58,821 --> 00:04:00,812 And you hope they do, but you're not sure. 39 00:04:01,024 --> 00:04:04,687 - That's why you're asking the question. - Do you think they get back together? 40 00:04:04,928 --> 00:04:07,021 I mean, did you in real life? 41 00:04:08,498 --> 00:04:10,329 Did I in real...? 42 00:04:10,700 --> 00:04:13,294 Look, in the words of my grandfather, okay: 43 00:04:13,469 --> 00:04:16,563 "To answer that would take the piss out of the whole thing." 44 00:04:17,473 --> 00:04:20,965 We just have the time for one last question. 45 00:04:21,177 --> 00:04:22,872 What is your next book? 46 00:04:25,481 --> 00:04:27,972 I don't know, man. I don't know. 47 00:04:28,217 --> 00:04:31,675 I've been... I've been thinking about this... 48 00:04:31,854 --> 00:04:34,550 Well, I always kind of wanted to write a book... 49 00:04:34,724 --> 00:04:38,387 ...that all took place within the space of a pop song. 50 00:04:38,594 --> 00:04:41,722 Like three or four minutes long, the whole thing. 51 00:04:41,965 --> 00:04:45,457 The story, the idea, is that there's this guy, right... 52 00:04:45,668 --> 00:04:48,364 ...and he's totally depressed. 53 00:04:48,571 --> 00:04:52,735 His great dream was to be a lover, an adventurer, you know... 54 00:04:52,909 --> 00:04:55,673 ...riding motorcycles through South America. 55 00:04:55,878 --> 00:04:58,608 And instead he's sitting at a marble table eating lobster. 56 00:04:58,781 --> 00:05:01,875 He's got a good job and a beautiful wife, right, but that... 57 00:05:02,051 --> 00:05:05,418 Everything that he needs. But that doesn't matter... 58 00:05:05,621 --> 00:05:08,590 ...because what he wants is to fight for meaning. 59 00:05:08,858 --> 00:05:11,088 You know? Happiness is in the doing, right? 60 00:05:11,294 --> 00:05:13,592 Not in the getting what you want. 61 00:05:13,796 --> 00:05:17,288 So he's sitting there, and just that second... 62 00:05:17,500 --> 00:05:21,732 ...his little 5-year-old daughter hops up on the table. 63 00:05:21,904 --> 00:05:25,203 And he knows that she should get down, because she could get hurt. 64 00:05:25,408 --> 00:05:30,107 But she's dancing to this pop song in a summer dress. 65 00:05:30,747 --> 00:05:32,738 And he looks down... 66 00:05:32,949 --> 00:05:35,440 ...and all of a sudden, he's 16. 67 00:05:36,285 --> 00:05:41,746 And his high-school sweetheart is dropping him off at home. 68 00:05:41,924 --> 00:05:45,485 And they just lost their virginity, and she loves him... 69 00:05:45,661 --> 00:05:49,620 ...and the same song is playing on the car radio. 70 00:05:49,899 --> 00:05:52,834 And she climbs up and starts dancing on the roof of the car. 71 00:05:53,069 --> 00:05:54,593 And now he's worried about her. 72 00:05:54,771 --> 00:05:59,071 And she's beautiful, with a facial expression just like his daughter's. 73 00:05:59,409 --> 00:06:01,570 In fact, maybe that's why he even likes her. 74 00:06:01,778 --> 00:06:04,679 You see, he knows he's not remembering this dance... 75 00:06:04,914 --> 00:06:08,611 ...he's there. He's there, in both moments, simultaneously. 76 00:06:08,818 --> 00:06:12,254 And just for an instant, all his life is just folding in on itself. 77 00:06:12,455 --> 00:06:15,151 And it's obvious to him that time is a lie. 78 00:06:17,460 --> 00:06:19,928 That it's all happening all the time... 79 00:06:20,096 --> 00:06:23,657 ...and inside every moment is another moment... 80 00:06:23,933 --> 00:06:25,764 ...all happening simultaneously. 81 00:06:25,968 --> 00:06:29,062 Anyway, that's kind of the idea. Anyway. 82 00:06:30,373 --> 00:06:32,773 Our author has to be going to the airport soon... 83 00:06:32,975 --> 00:06:35,876 ...so thank you all very much for coming over this afternoon. 84 00:06:36,112 --> 00:06:39,343 And a special thanks to Mr. Wallace for being with us. 85 00:06:39,582 --> 00:06:40,981 Thank you. Thank you. 86 00:06:41,150 --> 00:06:43,846 We hope to see you here again with your next book. 87 00:06:50,460 --> 00:06:53,827 Thank you all. How much longer before I have to go to the airport? 88 00:06:53,996 --> 00:06:55,623 Oh, you should leave at 7:30... 89 00:06:55,865 --> 00:06:58,390 - Seven-thirty at the very latest. - Okay. 90 00:07:03,306 --> 00:07:06,639 - Hi. - Hello. 91 00:07:09,245 --> 00:07:11,975 - How are you? - Good, and you? 92 00:07:13,749 --> 00:07:16,547 I'm good, yeah, I'm great. I'm... 93 00:07:17,353 --> 00:07:19,685 Do you wanna, maybe, get a cup of coffee? 94 00:07:20,423 --> 00:07:22,891 Didn't he just say you have a plane to catch? 95 00:07:23,926 --> 00:07:26,861 Yeah. But, I mean, I have a little time. 96 00:07:27,230 --> 00:07:30,529 - Okay. - Yeah? All right, well, let me... 97 00:07:30,733 --> 00:07:32,826 I'll meet you outside. Okay. 98 00:07:34,570 --> 00:07:36,936 Excuse me. I'm just gonna go get a cup of coffee. 99 00:07:37,173 --> 00:07:39,403 - I'll be back at 7:15. - Did you sign all these? 100 00:07:39,575 --> 00:07:42,203 - Yeah, I sure did. - Get your driver Philippe's card... 101 00:07:42,411 --> 00:07:44,902 ...so you can call his cell if you're running late. 102 00:07:45,148 --> 00:07:47,708 We'll put your bags in the car so you're not late. 103 00:07:47,917 --> 00:07:50,442 - All right, thanks for everything. - Thank you. 104 00:07:52,788 --> 00:07:54,756 Which one's Philippe? 105 00:08:12,708 --> 00:08:16,041 - I can't believe you're here. - I live here in Paris. 106 00:08:17,446 --> 00:08:20,779 Are you sure you don't have to stay? You're not supposed to talk more? 107 00:08:20,983 --> 00:08:23,042 They're sick of me. I spent the night here. 108 00:08:23,252 --> 00:08:26,585 - You did? - Yeah, they got a loft upstairs. 109 00:08:26,956 --> 00:08:29,322 - How are you? This is so weird. - I'm fine. 110 00:08:29,559 --> 00:08:33,256 - It's good to see you. - It's good to see you. 111 00:08:35,631 --> 00:08:38,065 - So you want to go to a caf�? - Yeah. 112 00:08:38,267 --> 00:08:40,633 Okay. There's one a little further that I like. 113 00:08:40,803 --> 00:08:44,705 I thought I was gonna totally lose it in there when I first saw you. 114 00:08:44,907 --> 00:08:46,636 How did you know I was gonna be here? 115 00:08:46,842 --> 00:08:51,245 It's my favorite bookstore in Paris. You can sit down for hours and read. 116 00:08:51,414 --> 00:08:53,405 I love it. There's fleas, but, you know... 117 00:08:53,583 --> 00:08:55,949 I know. I think a cat slept on my head last night. 118 00:08:56,118 --> 00:08:58,746 I saw your picture on the calendar about a month ago... 119 00:08:58,921 --> 00:09:00,786 ...and that you were going to be here. 120 00:09:01,224 --> 00:09:04,125 It's funny, because I read an article on your book... 121 00:09:04,293 --> 00:09:08,286 ...and it sounded vaguely familiar. - Vaguely? Yeah. 122 00:09:08,664 --> 00:09:12,498 But I didn't put it all together until I saw your photo. So... 123 00:09:12,668 --> 00:09:14,829 Did you have a chance to read it? 124 00:09:15,037 --> 00:09:16,470 Yes, I... 125 00:09:16,639 --> 00:09:19,107 I was really, really surprised, as you can imagine. 126 00:09:19,308 --> 00:09:21,936 I mean, I had to read it twice, actually. 127 00:09:22,144 --> 00:09:24,169 - Yeah? - Yeah. 128 00:09:25,615 --> 00:09:28,209 No, I liked it. It's very romantic. 129 00:09:28,384 --> 00:09:31,046 I usually don't like that, but it's really well-written. 130 00:09:31,287 --> 00:09:34,279 - It's well-written. Congratulations. - All right. Thank you. 131 00:09:34,690 --> 00:09:36,555 - Wait. - What? 132 00:09:36,792 --> 00:09:40,751 Before we go anywhere, I have to ask you... 133 00:09:41,163 --> 00:09:42,721 Sure. What? 134 00:09:42,898 --> 00:09:45,890 Did you show up in Vienna that December? 135 00:09:47,770 --> 00:09:52,139 - Did you? - No, I couldn't. But did you? 136 00:09:52,308 --> 00:09:55,675 - I need to know. It's important to me. - Why, if you didn't? 137 00:09:56,045 --> 00:09:58,036 Well, did you? 138 00:09:58,214 --> 00:09:59,704 No. 139 00:10:01,350 --> 00:10:02,840 Thank God you didn't. 140 00:10:03,052 --> 00:10:04,849 - Oh, my God. - Thank God you didn't. 141 00:10:05,054 --> 00:10:08,546 Thank God I didn't and you didn't. If one of us had showed up alone... 142 00:10:08,724 --> 00:10:11,158 ...that would have sucked. - I was so concerned. 143 00:10:11,327 --> 00:10:15,195 I felt horrible about not being there, but I couldn't. My grandma died... 144 00:10:15,398 --> 00:10:17,662 ...and she was buried that day, December 16th. 145 00:10:17,867 --> 00:10:20,427 - The one in Budapest? - Yes. You remember that? 146 00:10:20,670 --> 00:10:23,434 - I remember everything. - Of course, it was in your book. 147 00:10:23,606 --> 00:10:26,905 But anyway, I was about to fly to Vienna, you know... 148 00:10:27,109 --> 00:10:31,170 ...and we heard the news about her, and of course I had to go to the funeral. 149 00:10:31,347 --> 00:10:33,076 Yeah, I'm sorry to hear that. 150 00:10:33,249 --> 00:10:37,015 I know. But you weren't there anyway. 151 00:10:37,219 --> 00:10:39,710 Wait. Why weren't you there? 152 00:10:39,922 --> 00:10:43,255 I would have been there if I could have. I made plans... 153 00:10:43,459 --> 00:10:45,689 You better have a good reason. 154 00:10:45,895 --> 00:10:47,226 What? 155 00:10:49,332 --> 00:10:50,765 Oh, no. 156 00:10:51,434 --> 00:10:53,459 No, you were there, weren't you? 157 00:10:53,703 --> 00:10:56,365 Oh, no, that's terrible! 158 00:10:56,572 --> 00:10:58,267 I'm laughing, but I don't mean it. 159 00:10:58,441 --> 00:11:00,306 Did you hate me? You must've hated me. 160 00:11:00,476 --> 00:11:02,740 - Have you been hating me all this time? - No. 161 00:11:02,912 --> 00:11:04,243 - Yes, you have. - No. 162 00:11:04,447 --> 00:11:06,278 But you can't hate me now, right? 163 00:11:06,482 --> 00:11:09,610 - I mean, my grandma... - I don't hate you. It's no big deal. 164 00:11:09,852 --> 00:11:12,377 I flew all the way over there, you blew the thing off. 165 00:11:12,588 --> 00:11:15,648 My life's been a big nosedive since, but it's not a problem. 166 00:11:15,891 --> 00:11:18,724 - No, I'm kidding. - Don't say that. I can't believe it. 167 00:11:18,928 --> 00:11:21,396 You must have been so angry with me. I'm so sorry. 168 00:11:21,564 --> 00:11:24,089 I wanted to be there, more than anything in the world. 169 00:11:24,266 --> 00:11:26,996 - Honestly, I swear... - You can't be angry, my grandmother... 170 00:11:27,169 --> 00:11:30,832 I know. I honestly thought that something like that might have happened. 171 00:11:31,006 --> 00:11:33,099 I was definitely bummed, but... 172 00:11:33,275 --> 00:11:36,972 Mostly I was mad we hadn't exchanged any phone numbers or any information. 173 00:11:37,146 --> 00:11:39,137 That was so stupid. No way to get in touch. 174 00:11:39,315 --> 00:11:41,647 - Nothing to go on. - I didn't know your last name. 175 00:11:41,817 --> 00:11:45,014 Remember, we were both afraid if we started writing and calling... 176 00:11:45,187 --> 00:11:48,748 ...that it would slowly fade out. - It definitely wasn't a slow fade. 177 00:11:48,924 --> 00:11:50,152 No, it sure wasn't. 178 00:11:50,326 --> 00:11:52,157 We wanted to pick up where we left off. 179 00:11:52,328 --> 00:11:55,695 Which would have been fine if it had worked. Oh, well. 180 00:11:57,032 --> 00:11:58,590 So... 181 00:11:59,168 --> 00:12:02,399 - How long were you in Vienna, then? - Just a couple days. 182 00:12:03,939 --> 00:12:06,100 Did you meet another girl? 183 00:12:06,308 --> 00:12:08,902 Yeah, her name was Gretchen and she was amazing. 184 00:12:09,111 --> 00:12:11,807 The book's really a composite of the two of you. 185 00:12:12,014 --> 00:12:15,814 No, I'm kidding. You wouldn't believe... I even went back to the train station. 186 00:12:16,018 --> 00:12:20,114 I put up signs of my number in the hotel in case you'd been delayed. 187 00:12:20,289 --> 00:12:22,951 - I was a total dork. - Let's go this way. Did you get any calls? 188 00:12:23,359 --> 00:12:26,351 Just a couple hookers looking for a gig. 189 00:12:26,562 --> 00:12:29,122 No, it was awful, I mean, what do you want me to say? 190 00:12:29,298 --> 00:12:30,697 It's so sad. I'm so sorry. 191 00:12:30,933 --> 00:12:33,993 I walked around for a couple days. Eventually, I flew home. 192 00:12:34,203 --> 00:12:36,467 I owed my dad 2000 bucks... 193 00:12:36,672 --> 00:12:38,663 ...who had warned me about French chicks. 194 00:12:38,874 --> 00:12:40,739 What did he tell you about French women? 195 00:12:40,976 --> 00:12:43,035 Nothing. He's never met any French women. 196 00:12:43,245 --> 00:12:45,509 He's never been east of the Mississippi. 197 00:12:45,681 --> 00:12:49,913 Why didn't you put, "Six months later, the French bitch didn't show up"? 198 00:12:50,085 --> 00:12:51,677 No, but I did, I did. 199 00:12:51,887 --> 00:12:54,822 - You did? - Yeah. No. I made it more hopeful. 200 00:12:55,024 --> 00:12:57,549 I wrote this fictional version where you do show up. 201 00:12:57,760 --> 00:13:00,228 - Oh, what happens? - Well... 202 00:13:01,530 --> 00:13:03,157 What? 203 00:13:03,566 --> 00:13:06,558 We make love for about 10 days straight, that's one part of it. 204 00:13:06,735 --> 00:13:09,533 - Interesting. So the French slut, right? - Yeah, exactly. 205 00:13:09,738 --> 00:13:12,229 It's just then they get to know each other better... 206 00:13:12,408 --> 00:13:14,399 ...and realize they don't get along at all. 207 00:13:14,610 --> 00:13:17,909 - I like that. It's more real. - My editor didn't think that way. 208 00:13:18,080 --> 00:13:20,207 Everyone wants to believe in love. It sells. 209 00:13:20,382 --> 00:13:22,373 Yeah, exactly, so... 210 00:13:23,085 --> 00:13:25,679 So things are going well for you, right? I mean... 211 00:13:25,888 --> 00:13:29,085 - Your book is a bestseller in the U.S. - It's a tiny bestseller. 212 00:13:29,291 --> 00:13:31,282 - Oh, come on. - All right. Officially, yes. 213 00:13:31,527 --> 00:13:34,621 Most people haven't read Moby Dick. Why should they read my book? 214 00:13:34,797 --> 00:13:37,061 I haven't read Moby Dick and I liked your book. 215 00:13:37,233 --> 00:13:39,531 - Thanks. - Even though... 216 00:13:39,735 --> 00:13:42,499 ...I thought you idealized the night of it. 217 00:13:42,705 --> 00:13:44,400 Come on, it's fiction, right? 218 00:13:44,573 --> 00:13:46,234 - I'm supposed to... - I know, I know. 219 00:13:46,442 --> 00:13:49,639 I know. I thought there were times where you made me... 220 00:13:49,879 --> 00:13:54,248 Well, I mean, her, right? No, me. Okay, whatever. 221 00:13:54,416 --> 00:13:57,510 - A little bit neurotic. - You are a bit like that, aren't you? 222 00:13:57,720 --> 00:14:00,951 - You think I'm neurotic? - No, no, no. Come on, I'm kidding. 223 00:14:01,123 --> 00:14:02,988 Where did I do that? I didn't do that. 224 00:14:03,158 --> 00:14:05,888 Oh, maybe it's just me, you know... 225 00:14:06,061 --> 00:14:09,087 Reading something, knowing the character is based on you... 226 00:14:09,298 --> 00:14:11,960 ...it's both flattering and disturbing at the same time. 227 00:14:12,167 --> 00:14:13,657 How is it disturbing? 228 00:14:13,903 --> 00:14:18,101 I don't know. Just being part of someone else's memory. 229 00:14:18,274 --> 00:14:20,902 Seeing myself through your eyes. 230 00:14:21,076 --> 00:14:23,476 How long did it take you to write it? 231 00:14:24,446 --> 00:14:26,243 Three or four years, on and off. 232 00:14:26,448 --> 00:14:29,611 Wow, that's a really long time to be writing about one night. 233 00:14:29,818 --> 00:14:32,480 Yeah, I know. Tell me about it. 234 00:14:32,788 --> 00:14:35,256 I always assumed you had forgotten me. 235 00:14:35,658 --> 00:14:38,422 No, I had a pretty clear picture of you in my mind. 236 00:14:38,627 --> 00:14:41,027 - I have to tell you something. I just... - What? 237 00:14:41,196 --> 00:14:44,996 I've wanted to talk to you for so long that now... It's just surreal, you know? 238 00:14:45,200 --> 00:14:46,963 I feel like everything should be... 239 00:14:47,136 --> 00:14:49,570 How long do we have? Twenty minutes and 30 seconds? 240 00:14:49,772 --> 00:14:52,070 We got more than that. I wanna know about you. 241 00:14:52,274 --> 00:14:54,868 Tell me, what are you doing? What are you up to? 242 00:14:55,110 --> 00:14:59,706 Where to start? I work for Green Cross. It's an environmental organization. 243 00:14:59,949 --> 00:15:01,280 What are they all about? 244 00:15:01,483 --> 00:15:04,043 We basically work on different environment issues... 245 00:15:04,219 --> 00:15:06,847 ...from clean water to disarmament of chemical weapons. 246 00:15:07,022 --> 00:15:09,490 International laws that deal with the environment. 247 00:15:09,658 --> 00:15:12,024 - What do you do for them? - We're going this way. 248 00:15:12,461 --> 00:15:13,792 Different things. 249 00:15:13,996 --> 00:15:17,864 Like, last year I was in India for a while, working on a water-treatment plant. 250 00:15:18,667 --> 00:15:22,000 Well, the cotton industry there is a major source of pollution, so... 251 00:15:22,171 --> 00:15:25,106 I mean, it sounds like you're actually doing something. 252 00:15:25,307 --> 00:15:28,743 Most people, myself included, just sit around and bitch. 253 00:15:28,911 --> 00:15:33,575 You know, how America's consuming all the world's resources, SUVs suck... 254 00:15:33,749 --> 00:15:35,148 ...global warming is real... 255 00:15:35,351 --> 00:15:38,718 I'm relieved to hear you're not one of those "freedom fries" Americans. 256 00:15:38,887 --> 00:15:41,321 Hey, you know... But how'd you get into that? 257 00:15:41,490 --> 00:15:44,755 I came out of political science, hoping to work for the government. 258 00:15:44,994 --> 00:15:47,690 - And I did for a little while. Terrible. - Not good? 259 00:15:47,896 --> 00:15:51,525 Yeah, no. Anyway, I got really tired... Let's go this way. 260 00:15:51,734 --> 00:15:54,032 Having this endless conversation with friends... 261 00:15:54,203 --> 00:15:56,433 ...about how the world was falling to pieces. 262 00:15:56,672 --> 00:15:59,072 So I decided what I really wanted to do was... 263 00:15:59,274 --> 00:16:02,641 ...to find things that could be fixed and try to fix them, you know? 264 00:16:02,845 --> 00:16:06,576 You know, I always thought you'd be doing something cool like that. I did. 265 00:16:06,782 --> 00:16:11,719 Thanks. I just feel really, really lucky to be doing a job I like, you know? 266 00:16:11,920 --> 00:16:13,387 Yeah. 267 00:16:13,555 --> 00:16:18,288 I actually alternate in between thinking everything is irrevocably screwed up... 268 00:16:18,460 --> 00:16:20,758 ...and things might be getting better in ways. 269 00:16:20,963 --> 00:16:23,397 Better? How could you possibly say that? 270 00:16:23,565 --> 00:16:25,362 Well, I just mean, you know, like... 271 00:16:25,534 --> 00:16:29,197 I know it sounds weird, but there are things to be optimistic about. 272 00:16:29,405 --> 00:16:34,104 Okay... I know your book is selling, which is great, I'm very happy for you. 273 00:16:34,309 --> 00:16:37,574 But let me break the news to you: The world is a mess right now. 274 00:16:37,780 --> 00:16:40,271 From a Western view, things are getting a bit better. 275 00:16:40,482 --> 00:16:44,077 We're moving industry to developing nations where we can get cheap labor... 276 00:16:44,286 --> 00:16:47,551 ...free of any environmental laws. The weapon industry is booming. 277 00:16:47,723 --> 00:16:50,692 Five million people die a year from preventable water disease. 278 00:16:50,893 --> 00:16:53,885 How is the world getting better? I'm not angry, I'm not angry. 279 00:16:54,096 --> 00:16:56,189 But come on, I want to know. I'm interested. 280 00:16:56,398 --> 00:16:59,890 I realize that there are a lot of serious problems in the world. 281 00:17:00,102 --> 00:17:02,332 - Okay. Thank you. - I mean, I don't even have... 282 00:17:02,571 --> 00:17:05,938 ...one publisher in the Asian market. - Okay. All right. 283 00:17:06,608 --> 00:17:09,577 - Say stop. - What? Stop. 284 00:17:09,745 --> 00:17:13,647 Look, all I'm saying is there's more awareness. People are gonna fight back. 285 00:17:13,816 --> 00:17:16,808 The world might be getting better because people like you... 286 00:17:16,985 --> 00:17:18,612 ...are educated and speaking out. 287 00:17:19,088 --> 00:17:22,421 Even the very notion of conservation, environmental issues... 288 00:17:22,624 --> 00:17:24,990 ...weren't in the vocabulary till fairly recently. 289 00:17:25,160 --> 00:17:29,256 And they're becoming the norm and eventually might be what's expected. 290 00:17:29,465 --> 00:17:32,434 I agree with what you're saying, but at the same time it's dangerous. 291 00:17:32,634 --> 00:17:35,262 An imperialist country can use that kind of thinking... 292 00:17:35,437 --> 00:17:37,598 ...to justify their economic greed. 293 00:17:39,041 --> 00:17:43,102 Is there any particular imperialist country you have in mind, there, Frenchie? 294 00:17:43,278 --> 00:17:45,473 - No, not really. - No? 295 00:17:50,886 --> 00:17:54,378 - So you wanna sit over there? - Yeah, this is perfect. 296 00:17:54,790 --> 00:17:57,520 Oh, wow. Maybe what I'm saying is... 297 00:17:57,760 --> 00:18:00,661 ...the world might be evolving the way a person evolves. 298 00:18:00,829 --> 00:18:03,855 Like, I mean, me, for example. Am I getting worse? 299 00:18:04,032 --> 00:18:08,230 Am I improving? I don't know. When I was younger, I was healthier... 300 00:18:08,403 --> 00:18:10,894 ...but I was wracked with insecurity, you know? 301 00:18:11,540 --> 00:18:13,633 Now I'm older and my problems are deeper... 302 00:18:13,809 --> 00:18:15,674 ...but I'm more equipped to handle them. 303 00:18:16,411 --> 00:18:18,572 So, what are your problems? 304 00:18:20,149 --> 00:18:24,643 Right now I don't have any. I don't, you know? I'm just... 305 00:18:24,820 --> 00:18:26,549 ...damn happy to be here. 306 00:18:26,989 --> 00:18:28,547 Me too. 307 00:18:31,560 --> 00:18:33,824 So how long have you been in Paris? 308 00:18:34,029 --> 00:18:37,430 I got in last night. I've done 10 cities in 12 days. 309 00:18:37,666 --> 00:18:39,998 I'm wrecked. I'm so glad it's over, you know? 310 00:18:40,202 --> 00:18:41,669 I'm tired of being a huckster. 311 00:18:42,237 --> 00:18:43,727 - Hi. - Hello. 312 00:18:43,939 --> 00:18:45,429 What do you want? 313 00:18:45,674 --> 00:18:47,608 A cup of coffee. 314 00:18:51,380 --> 00:18:55,111 God, I love this caf�. I wish they had places like this in the U.S. 315 00:18:55,551 --> 00:18:58,042 Yeah, I missed caf�s when I was living over there. 316 00:18:58,253 --> 00:19:01,120 I mean, I find a few places I really liked, but there was... 317 00:19:01,356 --> 00:19:05,349 - You were living in the U.S.? - Yes, from '96 to '99. 318 00:19:05,561 --> 00:19:07,119 I was studying at NYU. 319 00:19:07,529 --> 00:19:10,123 Oh, God, don't tell me that, Celine. 320 00:19:10,365 --> 00:19:12,390 - What? - No, it's just... 321 00:19:12,601 --> 00:19:14,296 - Nothing, I mean, l... - What? 322 00:19:14,469 --> 00:19:17,870 I've been living in New York since '98. We were there at the same time. 323 00:19:18,040 --> 00:19:19,598 - In New York? - Yeah. 324 00:19:19,775 --> 00:19:24,474 That's weird. It actually crossed my mind a few times that I might run into you... 325 00:19:24,646 --> 00:19:26,978 ...but the odds are so slim, right? So... 326 00:19:27,583 --> 00:19:29,483 I didn't even know what city you were in. 327 00:19:29,651 --> 00:19:33,143 - Weren't you somewhere in Texas? - Yeah, yeah, definitely. I just... 328 00:19:33,388 --> 00:19:36,880 I was for a long time. I just, you know, wanted to try New York. 329 00:19:38,927 --> 00:19:40,588 What brought you back here? 330 00:19:40,796 --> 00:19:42,787 I had finished my master's, for one... 331 00:19:42,998 --> 00:19:45,228 ...and no visa, no more visa. 332 00:19:45,434 --> 00:19:49,803 And I was starting to get paranoid. All the violence in the medias: 333 00:19:49,972 --> 00:19:53,237 Gang violence, murders, especially serial killers... 334 00:19:54,877 --> 00:19:56,504 But the final straw was... 335 00:19:56,745 --> 00:19:59,612 ...one night I heard some noise on my fire escape... 336 00:19:59,815 --> 00:20:02,375 ...so I called 911, and the cops came eventually. 337 00:20:02,584 --> 00:20:06,076 - Like three hours later. - Yeah, after I had been raped and killed. 338 00:20:06,688 --> 00:20:09,179 No, but it was a man and a woman officer. 339 00:20:09,424 --> 00:20:11,415 I was explaining what I had heard... 340 00:20:11,627 --> 00:20:13,925 ...when the woman had to go move the police car. 341 00:20:14,096 --> 00:20:15,791 I was left alone with the male cop. 342 00:20:15,964 --> 00:20:20,424 Right away he asked me if I had a gun, and I said, "No, of course not." 343 00:20:20,636 --> 00:20:23,503 And he told me, "Well, you better think about getting one. 344 00:20:23,705 --> 00:20:27,038 This is America, not France. Okay?" 345 00:20:27,209 --> 00:20:30,337 And I said to him, "I have no idea how to shoot a gun... 346 00:20:30,545 --> 00:20:33,036 ...and I have no interest in firearms whatsoever." 347 00:20:33,282 --> 00:20:37,048 And that's when he pulled out his gun, like this, and he went: 348 00:20:37,286 --> 00:20:42,724 "Well, one day, you're gonna have something like this in your face... 349 00:20:42,991 --> 00:20:45,323 ...and if you wanna have a long life... 350 00:20:45,928 --> 00:20:49,694 ...you're gonna have to choose between you or them." 351 00:20:50,799 --> 00:20:55,168 And then they left. And the next morning I called for an application to get a gun. 352 00:20:55,370 --> 00:20:57,861 Me with a gun. I mean, that's really scary. 353 00:20:58,073 --> 00:21:00,200 But then I realized something was wrong. 354 00:21:00,442 --> 00:21:03,969 The way that cop had pulled his gun out, and everything, right? 355 00:21:04,179 --> 00:21:06,010 So I canceled my demand for the gun... 356 00:21:06,181 --> 00:21:09,309 ...and I called the police and tried to complain about that cop. 357 00:21:09,484 --> 00:21:12,044 - What happened with that? - It was so much paperwork... 358 00:21:12,220 --> 00:21:15,053 ...and then I got scared, with my shitty student visa... 359 00:21:15,223 --> 00:21:17,657 - Thought you'd get deported? - Exactly. I gave up... 360 00:21:17,826 --> 00:21:19,589 ...and forgot about the whole thing. 361 00:21:19,828 --> 00:21:23,389 - Well, I guess I never forgot. - Obviously. 362 00:21:23,598 --> 00:21:26,158 But still, you know, I really enjoyed being there. 363 00:21:26,368 --> 00:21:29,496 - There's lots of things I miss in the U.S. - Yeah? Like what? 364 00:21:31,473 --> 00:21:33,031 Well... 365 00:21:33,241 --> 00:21:35,732 The overall good mood people have there. 366 00:21:35,978 --> 00:21:38,037 Like, even if it can be bullshit sometimes. 367 00:21:38,213 --> 00:21:41,011 Like, "How you doing?" "Great." "How you doing?" "Great!" 368 00:21:41,416 --> 00:21:43,543 "Have a great day!" 369 00:21:43,986 --> 00:21:47,581 I don't know. Parisians can be so grumpy. Have you noticed? 370 00:21:47,789 --> 00:21:50,417 No, everybody seems pretty happy to me. 371 00:21:51,126 --> 00:21:54,061 - They're not happy. No. - They're not happy? 372 00:21:54,229 --> 00:21:57,596 No, they are. I don't know. I just mean French men. They drive me nuts. 373 00:21:57,799 --> 00:21:59,198 What is it? What about them? 374 00:21:59,534 --> 00:22:02,526 Well, they're very nice. They're great, you know, to be around. 375 00:22:02,738 --> 00:22:04,729 They love food, wine, they're great cooks. 376 00:22:04,906 --> 00:22:06,897 But I've had really bad luck with them. 377 00:22:07,075 --> 00:22:08,702 Why? What do you mean? 378 00:22:09,544 --> 00:22:12,536 - Well, I guess they're not as... - What? 379 00:22:12,748 --> 00:22:14,306 What's the word? 380 00:22:15,384 --> 00:22:18,649 - Horny? They're not as horny. - Horny? 381 00:22:18,887 --> 00:22:23,153 Wait, listen to me on this one. In that regard, I am proud to be an American. 382 00:22:23,325 --> 00:22:25,259 And you should be. In that regard only. 383 00:22:26,428 --> 00:22:28,419 Have you ever spent time in Eastern Europe? 384 00:22:28,897 --> 00:22:31,388 Eastern... No, I don't. Thank you. 385 00:22:32,434 --> 00:22:34,994 I remember as a teenager I went to Warsaw... 386 00:22:35,170 --> 00:22:37,730 ...when it was still a strict communist regime. 387 00:22:37,939 --> 00:22:40,305 - Which I don't approve of at all. - Sure you don't. 388 00:22:40,542 --> 00:22:42,510 - No, I don't. - I'm just kidding. 389 00:22:42,677 --> 00:22:45,612 But anyway, something about being there was very interesting. 390 00:22:45,781 --> 00:22:49,012 After a couple of weeks, something changed in me. 391 00:22:49,184 --> 00:22:52,347 The city was quite gloomy and gray... 392 00:22:52,554 --> 00:22:55,284 ...but after a while, my brain seemed clearer. 393 00:22:55,457 --> 00:22:57,118 I was writing more in my journal... 394 00:22:57,325 --> 00:23:00,488 ...ideas I'd never thought of before... - Communist ideas? 395 00:23:00,695 --> 00:23:02,856 - Listen, I'm not... - I'm sorry, l... 396 00:23:03,098 --> 00:23:04,827 - Okay. - Go on. 397 00:23:05,067 --> 00:23:07,627 Okay. I'll send you to a gulag later. 398 00:23:07,803 --> 00:23:11,261 No. But it took me a while to figure out why I felt so different. 399 00:23:11,440 --> 00:23:14,102 One day, as I was walking through the Jewish cemetery... 400 00:23:14,276 --> 00:23:16,176 ...I don't know why, but it occurred to me there... 401 00:23:16,344 --> 00:23:20,212 ...I realized that I had spent the last two weeks away from most of my habits. 402 00:23:20,382 --> 00:23:22,373 TV was in a language I didn't understand... 403 00:23:22,584 --> 00:23:25,314 ...there was nothing to buy, no advertisements anywhere... 404 00:23:25,487 --> 00:23:27,114 ...so all I'd been doing was... 405 00:23:27,289 --> 00:23:32,022 ...walk around, think, and write. My brain felt like it was at rest... 406 00:23:32,227 --> 00:23:35,822 ...free from the consuming frenzy. It was almost like a natural high. 407 00:23:36,031 --> 00:23:40,593 I felt so peaceful inside. No strange urge to be somewhere else... 408 00:23:40,802 --> 00:23:42,133 ...to shop... 409 00:23:42,337 --> 00:23:44,464 It could have seemed like boredom at first... 410 00:23:44,639 --> 00:23:46,402 ...but it became very, very soulful. 411 00:23:47,409 --> 00:23:48,967 It was interesting, you know? 412 00:23:49,144 --> 00:23:52,477 Can you believe it was nine years ago we were walking around Vienna? 413 00:23:52,981 --> 00:23:56,678 - Nine years? No, that's impossible. - No, it was. It feels like two months. 414 00:23:56,885 --> 00:23:58,819 But it was summer '94. 415 00:24:01,022 --> 00:24:03,320 Do I look any different? 416 00:24:04,893 --> 00:24:06,622 I do? 417 00:24:07,395 --> 00:24:08,657 I'd have to see you naked. 418 00:24:09,030 --> 00:24:10,998 - What? - I know, I'm sorry. 419 00:24:11,199 --> 00:24:13,565 Your hair was different back then. It was like... 420 00:24:13,735 --> 00:24:16,169 - It's the same... Oh, down. - Yeah, take it down. 421 00:24:16,338 --> 00:24:18,067 Down. Okay, it was down. Okay. 422 00:24:18,273 --> 00:24:20,434 Well? Voil�. 423 00:24:20,709 --> 00:24:22,199 So? 424 00:24:24,246 --> 00:24:26,407 Okay, come on. Tell me. 425 00:24:29,718 --> 00:24:32,278 Skinnier, I think. A little thinner. 426 00:24:33,355 --> 00:24:34,879 Did you think I was fat before? 427 00:24:35,090 --> 00:24:38,025 - No... - Yeah, you thought I was a fatty. 428 00:24:38,226 --> 00:24:42,253 No, you thought I was a fatty. You wrote a book about a fat French girl. 429 00:24:42,430 --> 00:24:44,364 - No, listen. - Oh, no. 430 00:24:44,566 --> 00:24:46,693 Seriously, all right? You look beautiful. 431 00:24:46,902 --> 00:24:48,893 Do I look any different? 432 00:24:49,237 --> 00:24:52,764 No. Not at all. Actually, you have this line. 433 00:24:52,974 --> 00:24:55,408 - I know. - It's like a scar. 434 00:24:55,610 --> 00:25:00,047 - A scar? Like a gunshot wound? - No, no, no. I like it. I'm sorry. 435 00:25:01,383 --> 00:25:06,184 I had this funny... Well, horrible dream the other day. 436 00:25:07,222 --> 00:25:11,249 I was having this awful nightmare that I was 32. 437 00:25:11,426 --> 00:25:14,623 And then I woke up, and I was 23. So relieved. 438 00:25:14,829 --> 00:25:17,423 And then I woke up for real, and I was 32. 439 00:25:17,632 --> 00:25:20,100 - Shit, man. It happens. - Scary. 440 00:25:20,302 --> 00:25:22,964 Time goes faster and faster. Apparently, it's because... 441 00:25:23,138 --> 00:25:26,596 ...we don't renew synapses after our 20s, so it's downhill from then on. 442 00:25:27,776 --> 00:25:30,768 I like getting older, you know? Life feels... 443 00:25:31,079 --> 00:25:34,606 I don't know, it feels more immediate. Like I can appreciate things more. 444 00:25:35,483 --> 00:25:38,077 No, me too, actually. I really love it. 445 00:25:38,520 --> 00:25:40,317 I was once... 446 00:25:40,522 --> 00:25:41,921 ...a drummer in a band. 447 00:25:42,123 --> 00:25:44,717 - You were? - Yeah. We were pretty good, actually. 448 00:25:44,926 --> 00:25:49,124 But the lead-singer guy, he was just so obsessed with us getting a record deal. 449 00:25:49,297 --> 00:25:52,266 It's all we talked about, thought about, getting bigger shows. 450 00:25:52,467 --> 00:25:55,959 Everything was just focused on the future all the time. And now... 451 00:25:56,137 --> 00:25:58,002 ...the band doesn't even exist anymore. 452 00:25:58,173 --> 00:26:00,539 And looking back at the shows we did play... 453 00:26:00,742 --> 00:26:03,643 ...even rehearsing, it was just so much fun. 454 00:26:03,812 --> 00:26:08,010 I just... Now I'd enjoy every minute of it. Could I have a drag of that? 455 00:26:08,283 --> 00:26:11,309 Well, your book has been published. That's a pretty big deal. 456 00:26:11,519 --> 00:26:14,784 You've been all around Europe. Are you enjoying every minute of it? 457 00:26:15,490 --> 00:26:17,355 - Not really. - Not really? 458 00:26:17,559 --> 00:26:18,958 No. 459 00:26:19,494 --> 00:26:22,156 - Do you have another one of those? - Yes, of course. 460 00:26:24,266 --> 00:26:25,790 Here. 461 00:26:26,668 --> 00:26:29,796 In my field, I see these people that... Oh, sorry. 462 00:26:30,005 --> 00:26:32,530 Come into it with big, idealist visions... 463 00:26:32,707 --> 00:26:35,471 ...of becoming the leader that will create a better world. 464 00:26:35,644 --> 00:26:37,839 They enjoy the goal, but not the process. 465 00:26:38,046 --> 00:26:39,911 - Right. - But the reality of it is... 466 00:26:40,081 --> 00:26:43,517 ...the true work of improving things is in the little achievements. 467 00:26:43,718 --> 00:26:46,687 - That's what you need to enjoy. - What do you mean, exactly? 468 00:26:46,888 --> 00:26:50,483 I was working for this organization that helped villages in Mexico. 469 00:26:51,159 --> 00:26:53,650 And their concerns was how to get the pencils... 470 00:26:53,828 --> 00:26:56,228 ...sent to the kid in those little country schools. 471 00:26:56,398 --> 00:27:00,232 It was not about big, revolutionary ideas. It was about pencils. 472 00:27:00,602 --> 00:27:04,060 I see the people that do the real work, and what's really sad is that... 473 00:27:04,439 --> 00:27:06,999 ...the people that are the most giving, hardworking... 474 00:27:07,175 --> 00:27:09,370 ...and capable of making this world better... 475 00:27:09,577 --> 00:27:12,705 ...usually don't have the ego and ambition to be a leader. 476 00:27:12,914 --> 00:27:15,542 They don't see any interest in superficial rewards. 477 00:27:15,750 --> 00:27:18,810 They don't care if their name ever appear in the press. 478 00:27:19,020 --> 00:27:21,818 They actually enjoy the process of helping others. 479 00:27:22,023 --> 00:27:24,719 - They're in the moment. - Yeah, but that's so hard... 480 00:27:24,893 --> 00:27:27,794 ...you know, to be in the moment. I mean, I feel like I'm... 481 00:27:27,962 --> 00:27:31,955 ...designed to be slightly dissatisfied with everything, you know? 482 00:27:32,133 --> 00:27:34,624 It's like always trying to better my situation. 483 00:27:34,869 --> 00:27:38,305 I satisfy one desire, and it just agitates another. 484 00:27:38,473 --> 00:27:42,034 And then I think, to hell with it, right? Desire's the fuel of life. 485 00:27:42,210 --> 00:27:45,043 You know? Do you think it's true... 486 00:27:45,246 --> 00:27:48,147 ...that if we never wanted anything, we'd never be unhappy? 487 00:27:48,383 --> 00:27:53,411 I don't know. Not wanting anything, isn't that a symptom of depression? 488 00:27:53,588 --> 00:27:57,217 Yeah, that is, right? I mean, it's healthy to desire, right? 489 00:27:57,425 --> 00:28:01,054 Yeah. I don't know. It's what all those Buddhist guys say, right? 490 00:28:01,262 --> 00:28:03,628 Liberate yourself from desire, and you'll find... 491 00:28:03,798 --> 00:28:06,995 ...you already have everything you need. - But I feel alive... 492 00:28:07,235 --> 00:28:09,999 ...when I want something more than basic survival needs. 493 00:28:10,171 --> 00:28:13,004 Wanting, whether it's intimacy with another person... 494 00:28:13,241 --> 00:28:14,970 ...or a pair of shoes, is beautiful. 495 00:28:15,176 --> 00:28:18,737 I like that we have those ever-renewing desires, you know? 496 00:28:18,947 --> 00:28:20,642 Maybe it's this sense of entitlement. 497 00:28:20,882 --> 00:28:24,613 You know, like whenever you feel like you deserve that new pair of shoes? 498 00:28:24,819 --> 00:28:28,687 It's okay to want things, as long as you aren't pissed off if you don't get them. 499 00:28:28,890 --> 00:28:30,755 Life's hard. It's supposed to be. 500 00:28:30,959 --> 00:28:33,951 If we didn't suffer, we wouldn't learn a thing, you know? 501 00:28:35,330 --> 00:28:37,264 So, what, are you Buddhist, or something? 502 00:28:38,299 --> 00:28:40,961 - No. - No? Why not? 503 00:28:41,403 --> 00:28:46,136 I don't know. The same reason I don't really consider myself anything, really. 504 00:28:46,508 --> 00:28:49,944 I decided a long time ago that I was gonna be open to everything... 505 00:28:50,145 --> 00:28:52,636 ...but not buy into any one and only belief system. 506 00:28:54,282 --> 00:28:57,410 I went to this Trappist monastery a couple years ago. 507 00:28:57,986 --> 00:29:01,854 - Trappist? - Yeah, they're Catholic. Cistercian. 508 00:29:02,123 --> 00:29:05,718 - Why did you do that? - Why? I'd been doing some reading. 509 00:29:05,960 --> 00:29:09,794 Thought it'd be cool. Have you ever spent any time with monks or nuns? 510 00:29:10,131 --> 00:29:13,464 - No. It's not really my style. - No? 511 00:29:14,235 --> 00:29:18,296 Well, I expected them to be all glowering and stern, but they weren't. 512 00:29:18,506 --> 00:29:21,066 They were quick to laugh, really easy to be around. 513 00:29:21,309 --> 00:29:24,301 Seriously, very attuned to everything, they were just... 514 00:29:24,546 --> 00:29:26,980 You know, they weren't trying to hustle anybody. 515 00:29:27,182 --> 00:29:29,673 They're trying to live and die in peace with God... 516 00:29:29,884 --> 00:29:32,375 ...or whatever part of them they feel is eternal. 517 00:29:32,587 --> 00:29:34,555 It was just so refreshing to be around. 518 00:29:34,722 --> 00:29:37,213 You realize that most of the people that you meet... 519 00:29:37,392 --> 00:29:39,189 ...are trying to get somewhere better. 520 00:29:39,360 --> 00:29:42,557 They're trying to make more cash, get a little more respect... 521 00:29:42,764 --> 00:29:45,198 ...have more people admire them. It's exhausting. 522 00:29:45,400 --> 00:29:48,528 - No kidding. - And it's exhausting to be one yourself. 523 00:29:48,736 --> 00:29:52,103 There I am, right, you know, all greedy to be more spiritual. 524 00:29:52,273 --> 00:29:55,868 "I want to be a better person," you know? You can't escape. 525 00:29:56,044 --> 00:30:02,210 I had this boyfriend of mine many years ago that wanted to be a Buddhist. 526 00:30:02,584 --> 00:30:05,109 So he went to Asia to visit some of those monasteries. 527 00:30:05,353 --> 00:30:09,050 - I've thought about doing that too. - Yeah, you should. I'll tell you why. 528 00:30:09,257 --> 00:30:12,624 He was good-looking, and each time he went to one of the monasteries... 529 00:30:12,794 --> 00:30:15,422 ...a monk offered to suck his cock. 530 00:30:15,630 --> 00:30:17,359 True story. 531 00:30:17,799 --> 00:30:20,734 It all comes down to that, doesn't it? 532 00:30:20,935 --> 00:30:23,096 That's why I really admire what you're doing. 533 00:30:23,304 --> 00:30:25,431 - You know? - What do you mean? Sucking cock? 534 00:30:25,640 --> 00:30:28,803 - No. - No? Wrong answer. 535 00:30:29,010 --> 00:30:32,776 No, I was gonna say you're not detached from life. 536 00:30:33,014 --> 00:30:35,414 You're putting your passion into action. 537 00:30:35,617 --> 00:30:38,279 Well, I try. 538 00:30:38,920 --> 00:30:42,287 You know something? I'm gonna be on planes... 539 00:30:42,457 --> 00:30:44,789 ...and in an airport for the next eight hours... 540 00:30:45,026 --> 00:30:47,392 I'd just love to see a little bit more of Paris. 541 00:30:47,662 --> 00:30:49,129 - Would you walk with me? - Yeah. 542 00:30:49,297 --> 00:30:50,628 - Do you mind? - That's great. 543 00:30:50,832 --> 00:30:52,766 - Do you want to? - Let's do that. Yeah. 544 00:30:52,967 --> 00:30:54,798 What do we owe here? Four-fifty? 545 00:30:55,036 --> 00:30:57,561 No, I got it, I got a little per diem going on here. 546 00:30:57,739 --> 00:30:59,969 - This good, for a tip? - Yeah, that's fine. 547 00:31:00,174 --> 00:31:02,540 - That's more than enough. - Throw that in too. 548 00:31:02,777 --> 00:31:06,269 - Is there anywhere to go around here? - It's sales day today. 549 00:31:06,481 --> 00:31:09,416 - What's that? - It's when everything's on sale in Paris. 550 00:31:09,918 --> 00:31:11,317 It's twice a year. 551 00:31:13,821 --> 00:31:15,482 All right, let's go shopping. 552 00:31:15,657 --> 00:31:18,785 No, no, no. That's a bad idea. I don't wanna inflict that on you. 553 00:31:18,993 --> 00:31:22,929 It's madness. Let's just go to this garden path. It's really nice. 554 00:31:23,231 --> 00:31:25,665 All right. That sounds better than shopping, actually. 555 00:31:25,833 --> 00:31:27,960 Not that I wouldn't do whatever you wanted. 556 00:31:28,136 --> 00:31:31,128 Sometimes I don't even need to buy anything. I just get high... 557 00:31:31,306 --> 00:31:33,103 ...on trying on and looking at things. 558 00:31:33,274 --> 00:31:35,037 Is this where we're going? 559 00:31:35,209 --> 00:31:37,473 - Yeah. - A therapist will tell you that's good. 560 00:31:37,645 --> 00:31:40,011 - Really? Are you ever in therapy? - Oh, no. 561 00:31:40,214 --> 00:31:43,274 - Do I seem like I'm in therapy? - I'm kidding. 562 00:31:43,685 --> 00:31:47,519 - Does it help your sex problems? - My sex problems? 563 00:31:47,689 --> 00:31:49,213 - I'm kidding. - Tell me the truth. 564 00:31:49,457 --> 00:31:51,687 - We didn't have any problems. - No, I'm kidding. 565 00:31:51,893 --> 00:31:54,361 - We didn't even have sex. - That's a joke, right? 566 00:31:54,596 --> 00:31:57,224 No, we didn't. I mean, that was the whole thing. 567 00:31:57,398 --> 00:31:59,457 - Of course we did. - No, no, no, we didn't. 568 00:31:59,667 --> 00:32:02,465 You didn't have a condom and I never have sex without one. 569 00:32:02,670 --> 00:32:04,535 I'm extremely paranoid. There's no way... 570 00:32:04,739 --> 00:32:07,299 I find it scary that you don't remember what happened. 571 00:32:07,475 --> 00:32:08,840 No, listen... 572 00:32:09,010 --> 00:32:11,706 ...I didn't write an entire book, but I kept a journal... 573 00:32:11,913 --> 00:32:15,872 ...and I wrote the whole night in it. That's what I meant, you idealizing it. 574 00:32:16,050 --> 00:32:19,315 All right, listen, I even remember what brand of condom we used. 575 00:32:19,487 --> 00:32:21,387 That's disgusting. I don't wanna hear it. 576 00:32:21,556 --> 00:32:24,116 - That's not disgusting. - No. 577 00:32:24,359 --> 00:32:28,853 Okay, when I get home I'll check my journal from '94, but I know I'm right. 578 00:32:31,733 --> 00:32:33,667 - Wait a minute. - What? 579 00:32:33,835 --> 00:32:36,565 - Was it in the cemetery? - No. 580 00:32:36,771 --> 00:32:39,171 No, we went to the cemetery in the afternoon. 581 00:32:39,340 --> 00:32:42,241 It was in the park, very late at night. 582 00:32:42,644 --> 00:32:44,771 - In the park? - Wait a minute, wait a minute. 583 00:32:44,946 --> 00:32:46,777 I can't... I can't... 584 00:32:47,715 --> 00:32:51,014 Is it that forgettable? You really don't remember? In the park? 585 00:32:51,219 --> 00:32:54,052 Okay. Wait a minute, I think you might be right... 586 00:32:54,255 --> 00:32:55,586 You're messing with me now. 587 00:32:55,790 --> 00:32:57,189 - No. - Are you messing with me? 588 00:32:57,392 --> 00:33:00,555 Okay. No, I'm sorry. I think... I mean, you're right, okay? 589 00:33:00,762 --> 00:33:04,220 Sometimes I put things in drawers inside my head and forget about it. 590 00:33:04,432 --> 00:33:07,094 It's less painful to put things away than live with it. 591 00:33:07,301 --> 00:33:10,031 What, so that night was, like, a sad memory for you? 592 00:33:10,238 --> 00:33:12,069 I didn't mean that night in particular. 593 00:33:12,240 --> 00:33:14,299 I meant certain things are better forgotten. 594 00:33:14,542 --> 00:33:17,033 I remember that night better than I do entire years. 595 00:33:17,245 --> 00:33:19,042 - Me too. - Really? 596 00:33:19,213 --> 00:33:21,374 Well, I thought I did. 597 00:33:23,985 --> 00:33:27,648 But maybe l... Maybe I put it away because of the fact that... 598 00:33:27,822 --> 00:33:30,950 ...my grandmother's funeral was the day we were supposed to meet. 599 00:33:31,192 --> 00:33:34,127 It was a tough day for me, but it must've been worse for you. 600 00:33:34,328 --> 00:33:38,924 It was unreal. I remember looking at her dead body in the coffin... 601 00:33:39,100 --> 00:33:43,469 ...at her beautiful hands, so warm, so sweet, that used to hold me... 602 00:33:43,971 --> 00:33:47,270 ...but nothing in that coffin resembled what I remembered of her. 603 00:33:47,442 --> 00:33:49,000 All the warmth was gone. 604 00:33:49,277 --> 00:33:52,075 And then I was crying, so confused if I was crying... 605 00:33:52,246 --> 00:33:57,809 ...because I was never gonna see her again or never gonna see you again... 606 00:33:58,019 --> 00:34:01,853 I'm sorry. I'm sorry to go on like this. I've been a little down this week. 607 00:34:02,090 --> 00:34:05,082 - Why? - I don't know. Nothing bad, just... 608 00:34:05,293 --> 00:34:07,261 Reading your book, maybe? 609 00:34:07,428 --> 00:34:11,296 No, but... Thinking of how hopeful I was that summer and fall... 610 00:34:11,499 --> 00:34:13,729 ...and since then it's been kind of a... 611 00:34:14,302 --> 00:34:15,701 I don't know. 612 00:34:15,870 --> 00:34:20,034 Memory is a wonderful thing if you don't have to deal with the past. 613 00:34:22,777 --> 00:34:25,610 "Memory is wonderful if you don't have to deal with the past." 614 00:34:25,780 --> 00:34:27,441 Can I put that on a bumper sticker? 615 00:34:27,615 --> 00:34:30,311 If you wrote a book about our night, that's a good title. 616 00:34:30,485 --> 00:34:34,353 - And it could be a total different book. - Yeah, there'd be no sex scenes. 617 00:34:34,956 --> 00:34:36,287 - But you know what? - What? 618 00:34:36,491 --> 00:34:37,856 Now that we've met again... 619 00:34:38,059 --> 00:34:40,687 ...we can change our memory of that December 16. 620 00:34:40,862 --> 00:34:44,298 It no longer has that sad ending of us never seeing each other again. 621 00:34:44,499 --> 00:34:48,959 Right. I mean, I guess a memory's never finished as long as you're alive. 622 00:34:49,170 --> 00:34:52,765 Yeah, I know. I have this memory from my childhood... 623 00:34:52,974 --> 00:34:55,534 ...I realized recently never happened. - What? 624 00:34:55,710 --> 00:34:58,679 Well, when I was 8 or 9, my mom was so paranoid... 625 00:34:58,846 --> 00:35:01,713 ...when I was walking home from my piano lesson at night... 626 00:35:01,883 --> 00:35:04,579 ...she'd warn me about dirty old men giving me candies... 627 00:35:04,786 --> 00:35:06,583 ...and then showing me their pee-pees. 628 00:35:06,788 --> 00:35:09,848 She was so obsessed with it that, later in life, you know... 629 00:35:10,024 --> 00:35:13,425 ...I had this image in my head that this really happened. 630 00:35:13,594 --> 00:35:17,155 To the point that I even associated sex with that walk home. 631 00:35:17,331 --> 00:35:21,028 I mean, and sometimes, even now, when I'm... 632 00:35:21,903 --> 00:35:25,862 When I'm having sex, I see myself walking down that street. 633 00:35:26,040 --> 00:35:27,940 I swear. It's so weird, right? 634 00:35:28,109 --> 00:35:32,341 - Is that street nearby? I mean, could...? - Could we? No. 635 00:35:32,513 --> 00:35:34,708 Very far. 636 00:35:35,883 --> 00:35:38,408 Did you ever keep a journal when you were a kid? 637 00:35:38,586 --> 00:35:41,919 Yeah. On and off, I guess. 638 00:35:42,089 --> 00:35:44,250 It's funny, I read one of mine... 639 00:35:44,425 --> 00:35:46,325 ...from '83 the other day. - Yeah? 640 00:35:46,627 --> 00:35:48,288 And what really surprised me is... 641 00:35:48,462 --> 00:35:51,397 ...that I was dealing with life the same way I am now. 642 00:35:51,599 --> 00:35:53,590 I was much more hopeful and naive... 643 00:35:53,768 --> 00:35:58,068 ...but the core, and the way I was feeling things, is exactly the same. 644 00:35:58,239 --> 00:36:00,571 It made me realize I haven't changed much at all. 645 00:36:00,741 --> 00:36:02,231 I don't think anybody does. 646 00:36:02,410 --> 00:36:06,210 People don't want to admit it, but it's like we have these innate set points... 647 00:36:06,380 --> 00:36:09,975 ...and nothing much that happens to us changes our disposition. 648 00:36:10,151 --> 00:36:11,618 - You believe that? - I think so. 649 00:36:11,786 --> 00:36:15,119 I read this study where they followed people who'd won the lottery... 650 00:36:15,289 --> 00:36:17,154 ...and people who'd become paraplegics. 651 00:36:17,358 --> 00:36:21,488 You'd think one extreme is gonna make you euphoric and the other suicidal. 652 00:36:21,662 --> 00:36:24,392 But the study shows that, after about six months... 653 00:36:24,565 --> 00:36:27,830 ...as soon as people had gotten used to their new situation... 654 00:36:28,002 --> 00:36:30,334 ...they were, more or less, the same. - The same? 655 00:36:30,504 --> 00:36:33,735 Yeah. Like, if they were basically an optimistic, jovial person... 656 00:36:33,908 --> 00:36:36,741 ...they're now an optimistic, jovial person in a wheelchair. 657 00:36:36,944 --> 00:36:38,912 If they're a petty, miserable asshole... 658 00:36:39,080 --> 00:36:43,016 ...they're a petty, miserable asshole with a new Cadillac, a house and a boat. 659 00:36:43,184 --> 00:36:46,517 So I'll be forever depressed no matter what great things happen? 660 00:36:46,687 --> 00:36:48,086 - Definitely. - Great. 661 00:36:48,256 --> 00:36:49,951 No, come on, are you depressed now? 662 00:36:50,124 --> 00:36:52,422 No, no, I'm not depressed. 663 00:36:52,593 --> 00:36:55,255 But sometimes I worry I'll get to the end of my life... 664 00:36:55,429 --> 00:36:58,956 ...feeling I haven't done all I wanted to. - Well, what do you want to do? 665 00:36:59,133 --> 00:37:00,828 I... 666 00:37:01,002 --> 00:37:04,028 I want to paint more, I want to play my guitar every day. 667 00:37:04,205 --> 00:37:07,436 I want to learn Chinese. I want to write more songs. 668 00:37:07,608 --> 00:37:11,942 There's so many things I want to do, and I end up doing not much. 669 00:37:12,847 --> 00:37:18,683 All right, well, let me ask you this: Do you believe in ghosts or spirits? 670 00:37:18,853 --> 00:37:20,218 No. 671 00:37:20,421 --> 00:37:21,718 - No? - No. 672 00:37:21,923 --> 00:37:25,654 - Okay, what about reincarnation? - Not at all. 673 00:37:25,826 --> 00:37:27,794 - God? - No. 674 00:37:27,962 --> 00:37:30,453 - All right. - That sounds terrible. No, no, no. 675 00:37:30,631 --> 00:37:34,533 But I don't want to be one of those people that don't believe in any magic. 676 00:37:34,702 --> 00:37:36,636 - So then, astrology? - Yes, of course! 677 00:37:36,804 --> 00:37:38,635 - There we go. - That makes sense, right? 678 00:37:38,806 --> 00:37:42,207 You're a Scorpio, I'm a Sag, we get along. 679 00:37:43,144 --> 00:37:44,975 No, no, no. 680 00:37:45,146 --> 00:37:48,172 There's an Einstein quote I really, really like. 681 00:37:48,349 --> 00:37:51,841 He said, "If you don't believe in any kind of magic or mystery... 682 00:37:52,019 --> 00:37:54,852 ...you're basically as good as dead." - Yeah, I like that. 683 00:37:55,022 --> 00:37:58,355 I've always felt there was some kind of mystical core to the universe. 684 00:37:58,526 --> 00:38:03,725 But, more recently, I've started to think that, me, my personality, whatever... 685 00:38:03,898 --> 00:38:06,992 That I don't have any permanent place here, you know. 686 00:38:07,168 --> 00:38:08,829 In eternity or whatever, you know. 687 00:38:09,003 --> 00:38:12,837 And the more I think that, I can't go through life saying this is no big deal. 688 00:38:13,007 --> 00:38:16,499 This is it. This is actually happening. What do you think is interesting? 689 00:38:16,677 --> 00:38:18,838 What do you think is funny? What is important? 690 00:38:19,046 --> 00:38:21,344 You know, every day's our last. 691 00:38:21,716 --> 00:38:25,208 When I feel that way, I usually call my mom to tell her I love her. 692 00:38:25,386 --> 00:38:27,013 - Yeah? - And she's always: 693 00:38:27,188 --> 00:38:31,284 "Are you okay? Do you have cancer? Are you gonna commit suicide?" 694 00:38:31,492 --> 00:38:34,086 It's almost not worth it. 695 00:38:35,296 --> 00:38:38,094 So, what about us? 696 00:38:38,265 --> 00:38:40,790 - What about us? - No, what I mean is... 697 00:38:41,002 --> 00:38:44,563 ...if we were both going to die tonight... - Like the apocalypse was coming? 698 00:38:44,739 --> 00:38:48,869 No, that's too dramatic... But what if just the two of us were going to die? 699 00:38:49,043 --> 00:38:50,977 I mean, would we talk about your book? 700 00:38:51,145 --> 00:38:53,909 - The environment? Or... - lf today was our last day? 701 00:38:54,081 --> 00:38:56,709 Yeah, what would we talk about? What would you tell me? 702 00:38:56,884 --> 00:38:58,408 - Well... - That's hard, huh? 703 00:38:58,586 --> 00:38:59,917 - No, no, I'll do it. - Okay. 704 00:39:00,087 --> 00:39:02,555 I definitely would stop talking about my book. 705 00:39:02,723 --> 00:39:05,385 - I would probably drop the environment. - Okay. 706 00:39:05,559 --> 00:39:09,495 But I would still want to talk about, you know, the magic in the universe. 707 00:39:09,663 --> 00:39:12,894 - I'd just want to do it from a... - What? 708 00:39:13,067 --> 00:39:14,659 ...a hotel room, you know... 709 00:39:14,835 --> 00:39:18,635 ...in between sessions of us wildly fucking until we die. 710 00:39:18,806 --> 00:39:21,639 Wow. Well, why waste time with an hotel room? 711 00:39:21,809 --> 00:39:25,245 Why not do it right there on a bench? 712 00:39:25,980 --> 00:39:28,346 Come here, come here, come here. 713 00:39:28,549 --> 00:39:30,949 Okay. We're not gonna die tonight. 714 00:39:31,118 --> 00:39:33,143 All right. Too bad. I'm sorry. 715 00:39:33,320 --> 00:39:34,844 That was an extreme example. 716 00:39:35,056 --> 00:39:37,490 - I'm sorry. - Okay. 717 00:39:37,658 --> 00:39:39,319 What l... My point was, you know... 718 00:39:39,493 --> 00:39:42,326 ...to truly communicate with people is very hard to do. 719 00:39:42,496 --> 00:39:45,294 No, I know, most of our day-to-day exchanges... 720 00:39:45,466 --> 00:39:46,990 Yeah, no, I mean... 721 00:39:47,168 --> 00:39:49,796 ...not to bring everything back to sex... - But why not? 722 00:39:49,970 --> 00:39:53,098 No, this example, this friend of mine, she was talking about... 723 00:39:53,274 --> 00:39:56,300 - She and her boyfriend... Problems in bed. - Right. 724 00:39:56,510 --> 00:40:00,002 And how when they had been dating for a year she started telling him... 725 00:40:00,181 --> 00:40:03,173 ...what he could do to please her more, and it freaked him out. 726 00:40:03,350 --> 00:40:04,681 - Why? - Totally. 727 00:40:04,885 --> 00:40:06,876 He thought it meant he was a bad lover... 728 00:40:07,088 --> 00:40:08,953 Maybe she shouldn't have waited so long. 729 00:40:09,123 --> 00:40:11,489 - After a year... - But men are so easily offended. 730 00:40:11,659 --> 00:40:14,150 - What, more than women? - Definitely on that subject. 731 00:40:14,328 --> 00:40:15,693 - You think so? - Yeah, yeah. 732 00:40:16,464 --> 00:40:18,557 Well, maybe it's because, you know... 733 00:40:18,732 --> 00:40:22,793 ...men are easier to... To please. - To please? 734 00:40:23,003 --> 00:40:25,995 - Well, I don't know. - Yeah, they are. They're definitely. 735 00:40:26,207 --> 00:40:28,334 Anyway, this friend, she was telling me... 736 00:40:28,509 --> 00:40:32,172 ...next time she dates a man, she's gonna make a little questionnaire... 737 00:40:32,346 --> 00:40:35,804 ...about what they like and dislike... - What, written down, or out loud? 738 00:40:35,983 --> 00:40:37,712 Yeah, mostly written down. 739 00:40:37,885 --> 00:40:41,548 But it wouldn't be just yes or no. It would be a bit more complex than that. 740 00:40:41,722 --> 00:40:45,214 Like, for example, if the question is: "Are you into S & M?" 741 00:40:45,392 --> 00:40:50,227 The answer could be: "No, but a good spanking once in a while doesn't hurt." 742 00:40:50,397 --> 00:40:54,094 Right, or like: "Do you like talking dirty in bed?" 743 00:40:54,268 --> 00:40:57,726 - That kind of thing? - Yeah, but not just like any dirty talk. 744 00:40:57,905 --> 00:41:00,271 Just "What specific word would you like to hear?" 745 00:41:00,441 --> 00:41:01,772 - What, me? - Well, yeah. 746 00:41:01,942 --> 00:41:04,604 For example what specific word would you like to hear? 747 00:41:04,778 --> 00:41:06,405 I don't know. 748 00:41:07,915 --> 00:41:10,440 What do you feel about the word "pussy"? 749 00:41:10,651 --> 00:41:13,415 I love it. 750 00:41:13,787 --> 00:41:15,448 Good. 751 00:41:15,656 --> 00:41:18,625 It's amazing what perverts we've become in the past nine years. 752 00:41:18,792 --> 00:41:22,091 At least now we don't have to pretend each new sexual experience... 753 00:41:22,263 --> 00:41:23,958 ...is, like, a life-altering event. 754 00:41:24,165 --> 00:41:27,623 I know. By now, you've stuck it in so many places it's about to fall off. 755 00:41:27,801 --> 00:41:31,532 And I can't realistically expect you've become anything but a total ho. 756 00:41:31,705 --> 00:41:35,106 - Yeah, thank you. - No, I'm s... 757 00:41:35,709 --> 00:41:38,701 - That's true. What can you do? - What can you do? 758 00:41:38,879 --> 00:41:42,645 So, what kind of songs do you write? I didn't know you did that. 759 00:41:42,816 --> 00:41:44,044 - What kind? - Yeah, sure. 760 00:41:44,218 --> 00:41:45,879 - I don't know, just songs. - Like? 761 00:41:46,053 --> 00:41:48,715 Like, some are about, you know, people. 762 00:41:48,889 --> 00:41:50,550 Relationships. One's about my cat. 763 00:41:50,724 --> 00:41:53,215 - Sing one. - No, I can't. I don't have a guitar. 764 00:41:53,394 --> 00:41:54,952 - Come on. A cappella. - No, no, no.