1
00:00:10,310 --> 00:00:12,175
[ Applause ]
2
00:00:12,245 --> 00:00:14,008
Before I start signing these,
3
00:00:14,114 --> 00:00:16,742
I need to thank somebody
who's here tonight.
4
00:00:16,850 --> 00:00:19,910
When I had her at State--
That didn't sound right.
5
00:00:20,020 --> 00:00:23,285
I never had her.
I wanted her, but never had her.
6
00:00:23,356 --> 00:00:25,688
What I meant was
when I took her class.
7
00:00:25,759 --> 00:00:29,251
I had the worst case
of writer's block in the world.
8
00:00:29,329 --> 00:00:33,026
All I had were terrible ideas.
I hated them all.
9
00:00:33,099 --> 00:00:35,033
I was just about
to drop the class
10
00:00:35,101 --> 00:00:40,937
when she said something to me
that changed everything.
11
00:00:43,043 --> 00:00:47,946
She said, "Terrible ideas
are like playground scapegoats.
12
00:00:48,014 --> 00:00:51,177
Given the right encouragement,
they grow up to be geniuses."
13
00:00:51,284 --> 00:00:55,118
She told me to take one,
and work on it.
14
00:00:55,188 --> 00:00:57,816
Well, I did.
15
00:00:59,759 --> 00:01:02,853
Frances Mayes,
who loves terrible ideas,
16
00:01:02,929 --> 00:01:05,159
may I please French kiss
you now?
17
00:01:05,231 --> 00:01:06,528
MAN:
Go for it, Willie boy!
18
00:01:06,599 --> 00:01:09,033
Married, William.
Sorry.
19
00:01:12,739 --> 00:01:13,797
Proud of me?
20
00:01:13,873 --> 00:01:15,670
Ridiculously.
21
00:01:15,742 --> 00:01:17,937
Frances, these are amazing.
What did you do?
22
00:01:18,011 --> 00:01:20,138
Chocolate is timing, my friend.
23
00:01:20,213 --> 00:01:22,511
- The rest is magic.
- Hey, Professor.
24
00:01:22,582 --> 00:01:25,551
- Where is the wine?
- Over there.
25
00:01:25,652 --> 00:01:27,313
Tom is one lucky bastard.
26
00:01:27,387 --> 00:01:29,753
A literary wife
who makes brownies.
27
00:01:29,823 --> 00:01:31,552
I swear, if you tell me
you cook in the nude,
28
00:01:31,624 --> 00:01:33,455
I'll go home and kill myself.
29
00:01:33,526 --> 00:01:35,585
Never in the nude.
Always in a thong.
30
00:01:35,662 --> 00:01:39,689
Actually, if you knew Frances,
you'd know these are avoidance.
31
00:01:39,766 --> 00:01:40,926
Thanks.
32
00:01:41,000 --> 00:01:43,093
- How's the novel going?
- Not so well.
33
00:01:43,169 --> 00:01:46,866
But the procrastination
is coming along fabulously.
34
00:01:46,940 --> 00:01:49,340
Soon it will breed
abject self-loathing,
35
00:01:49,409 --> 00:01:52,276
and then I'll just become
a writing machine.
36
00:01:52,345 --> 00:01:55,542
What about Tom?
How's his book going?
37
00:01:55,648 --> 00:01:57,775
Fine.
He's home writing right now.
38
00:01:57,884 --> 00:01:58,816
You know Tom?
39
00:01:58,885 --> 00:02:02,218
I met him recently,
sort of by coincidence.
40
00:02:02,288 --> 00:02:06,782
The other coincidence is that
you reviewed a book of mine.
41
00:02:06,860 --> 00:02:09,761
I did?
Did I like it?
42
00:02:09,829 --> 00:02:11,922
You didn't.
43
00:02:11,998 --> 00:02:14,967
Well, I'm sorry.
44
00:02:15,034 --> 00:02:18,299
I'm sure there were a lot
of other critics who loved it.
45
00:02:18,371 --> 00:02:21,465
And I really hope
you didn't take it personally.
46
00:02:21,541 --> 00:02:25,500
You called my lead character
"unrealistic."
47
00:02:26,513 --> 00:02:29,505
I think bad reviews
should just be forgotten.
48
00:02:29,616 --> 00:02:31,174
Give him a brownie.
49
00:02:31,284 --> 00:02:34,014
I would like to give you this.
It comes in peace.
50
00:02:34,120 --> 00:02:37,612
You said you just couldn't
get interested in a novel
51
00:02:37,690 --> 00:02:39,920
where the protagonist was a guy
52
00:02:39,993 --> 00:02:44,327
who spent all of his time living
out his horny teenage fantasies.
53
00:02:44,397 --> 00:02:48,356
I just find that ironic.
54
00:02:48,434 --> 00:02:51,335
Ironic. Why?
55
00:02:53,139 --> 00:02:55,004
Ask your husband.
56
00:03:05,885 --> 00:03:07,876
What did he just say?
57
00:03:27,740 --> 00:03:29,230
MAN:
Frances?
58
00:03:29,309 --> 00:03:30,799
Frances?
59
00:03:33,313 --> 00:03:35,873
I've got some
unfortunate news for you.
60
00:03:37,784 --> 00:03:40,753
I just got off the phone
with your husband's attorney,
61
00:03:40,853 --> 00:03:44,482
and they're going to
pursue alimony.
62
00:03:46,593 --> 00:03:48,527
How can we be talking
about alimony
63
00:03:48,595 --> 00:03:51,996
when I hardly make enough money?
64
00:03:52,065 --> 00:03:54,863
But you supported him
during the marriage.
65
00:03:54,934 --> 00:03:56,060
Yes.
66
00:03:56,135 --> 00:03:58,968
But while he was researching
and writing his book,
67
00:03:59,038 --> 00:04:01,302
I worked while
he pretended to be...
68
00:04:01,374 --> 00:04:04,309
Unfortunately,
this is just about the math.
69
00:04:04,377 --> 00:04:05,810
He was having an affair.
70
00:04:05,878 --> 00:04:08,210
California's a no-fault state.
71
00:04:08,281 --> 00:04:10,010
His attorney indicated
your husband
72
00:04:10,116 --> 00:04:12,277
would prefer an alimony buy-out.
73
00:04:12,385 --> 00:04:15,582
Since you two were living
rather modestly,
74
00:04:15,655 --> 00:04:18,249
I don't think
the number should be too bad.
75
00:04:18,324 --> 00:04:24,490
They're probably talking about
something like $200,000.
76
00:04:24,564 --> 00:04:26,054
I don't have that money.
77
00:04:26,132 --> 00:04:28,396
Unfortunately, you do.
78
00:04:29,535 --> 00:04:30,729
The house?
79
00:04:30,803 --> 00:04:34,739
Its value went through the roof
since you bought it.
80
00:04:36,142 --> 00:04:38,372
And renovated it
with my mother's money.
81
00:04:38,444 --> 00:04:42,710
Well, it's all
community property now.
82
00:04:44,717 --> 00:04:49,780
So he gets
half the house and alimony.
83
00:04:49,856 --> 00:04:53,314
There's leeway, and we'll make
all the arguments we can.
84
00:04:53,426 --> 00:04:56,918
But there is a bargaining chip.
He wants the house.
85
00:04:56,996 --> 00:05:00,295
- He wants to keep living there?
- Yeah.
86
00:05:00,366 --> 00:05:02,493
And if you let him have it,
87
00:05:02,568 --> 00:05:06,732
you could end up with
a lot of money in your pocket.
88
00:05:06,806 --> 00:05:09,434
I understand he wants it
pretty badly.
89
00:05:09,509 --> 00:05:13,172
I'm sorry.
This is so surreal.
90
00:05:15,481 --> 00:05:19,611
How would he even find the money
to buy me out of my half?
91
00:05:21,988 --> 00:05:23,580
Oh.
92
00:05:24,624 --> 00:05:25,989
Oh.
93
00:05:27,193 --> 00:05:28,626
Wow.
94
00:05:28,695 --> 00:05:31,323
Apparently, she likes the place.
95
00:05:31,397 --> 00:05:33,729
It's near the right schools.
96
00:05:35,768 --> 00:05:38,066
Schools?
97
00:05:38,137 --> 00:05:39,468
She's...
98
00:05:47,580 --> 00:05:50,048
You're gonna get over this.
99
00:05:50,149 --> 00:05:52,583
You will, Frances.
100
00:05:54,120 --> 00:05:56,452
Someday,
you're gonna be happy again.
101
00:05:58,791 --> 00:06:00,884
Right.
102
00:06:00,960 --> 00:06:02,359
And the desk?
103
00:06:02,428 --> 00:06:04,259
The desk goes.
104
00:06:04,330 --> 00:06:07,697
No, the desk can stay.
105
00:06:07,767 --> 00:06:09,928
- The couch?
- Yes, please.
106
00:06:10,002 --> 00:06:12,903
[ Speaking Spanish ]
107
00:06:15,608 --> 00:06:19,100
Wait a minute.
No, the sofas can stay.
108
00:06:19,178 --> 00:06:22,705
[ Speaking Spanish ]
109
00:06:22,782 --> 00:06:25,080
How about the chairs?
110
00:06:25,151 --> 00:06:26,618
They stay, too.
111
00:06:26,719 --> 00:06:32,954
Actually, everything's going
to stay except those boxes.
112
00:06:33,025 --> 00:06:35,152
Those boxes
with the books in them.
113
00:06:36,863 --> 00:06:39,195
If you don't mind.
114
00:06:39,265 --> 00:06:41,062
You're sure?
115
00:06:41,134 --> 00:06:42,328
Yeah.
116
00:06:42,402 --> 00:06:44,267
The bedroom?
117
00:06:45,605 --> 00:06:46,697
Nope.
118
00:06:46,773 --> 00:06:49,901
- Kitchen?
- No.
119
00:06:49,976 --> 00:06:51,967
[ Speaking Spanish ]
120
00:06:54,580 --> 00:06:57,640
So then we're done.
121
00:06:58,684 --> 00:06:59,981
We're done.
122
00:07:22,175 --> 00:07:24,268
You getting a divorce?
123
00:07:26,179 --> 00:07:28,204
It shows?
124
00:07:28,281 --> 00:07:30,181
These are furnished,
short-term apartments.
125
00:07:30,283 --> 00:07:32,717
That's who we get.
126
00:07:32,785 --> 00:07:35,777
Your neighbor in 2-B.
He's an attorney.
127
00:07:35,855 --> 00:07:38,847
His divorce has been
dragging on for three years.
128
00:07:38,925 --> 00:07:40,790
Nice guy.
129
00:07:40,860 --> 00:07:43,124
Gives free legal advice
to the other tenants.
130
00:07:43,196 --> 00:07:45,721
[ Man crying ]
131
00:07:45,798 --> 00:07:49,393
If his crying gets on your
nerves, just bang on the wall.
132
00:07:49,469 --> 00:07:52,063
- He'll stop.
- Sorry.
133
00:07:54,207 --> 00:07:57,734
Guy above you is a doctor.
He hands out the sleeping pills.
134
00:07:57,810 --> 00:08:00,074
- What do you do?
- I'm a writer.
135
00:08:00,146 --> 00:08:04,446
So you can help the others
with their suicide notes.
136
00:08:04,517 --> 00:08:05,347
Wow.
137
00:08:05,418 --> 00:08:08,148
You're one of those
funny landlords.
138
00:08:08,254 --> 00:08:10,017
Not really.
139
00:08:11,257 --> 00:08:13,384
Well, here's your keys.
140
00:08:14,393 --> 00:08:17,055
Have a good stay.
141
00:08:17,129 --> 00:08:18,960
Thanks.
142
00:08:31,911 --> 00:08:33,378
Home.
143
00:08:42,255 --> 00:08:43,222
PATTI:
Ta-da!
144
00:08:43,289 --> 00:08:45,689
You start a marriage
with cake and champagne.
145
00:08:45,758 --> 00:08:47,123
Finish it that way, too.
146
00:08:47,193 --> 00:08:50,685
The beginning and the end
should be fun, fun, fun.
147
00:08:50,763 --> 00:08:52,788
Too bad about those years
in the middle.
148
00:08:52,865 --> 00:08:54,992
- Sorry.
- Make a wish.
149
00:08:55,067 --> 00:08:56,694
Things got crazy
at the hospital.
150
00:08:56,769 --> 00:08:59,499
Hi. You made it
in time for the toast.
151
00:08:59,572 --> 00:09:01,938
Bravo.
And it only took a year.
152
00:09:02,008 --> 00:09:04,135
- To freedom.
- To freedom.
153
00:09:04,243 --> 00:09:05,403
Thanks.
154
00:09:09,916 --> 00:09:13,317
You're not drinking.
You're not drinking.
155
00:09:13,386 --> 00:09:14,683
Fifth time was a charm.
156
00:09:14,754 --> 00:09:16,984
Oh, my God!
157
00:09:17,056 --> 00:09:19,456
Patti!
When are you due?
158
00:09:19,525 --> 00:09:21,288
- May.
- May!
159
00:09:21,360 --> 00:09:22,691
Oh, my God!
160
00:09:22,762 --> 00:09:24,389
I'm going to be an auntie!
161
00:09:24,463 --> 00:09:28,024
I'm going to be an auntie.
Yes.
162
00:09:30,570 --> 00:09:32,265
It changes our plans a bit.
163
00:09:32,338 --> 00:09:33,771
Well, of course.
164
00:09:33,839 --> 00:09:37,172
We were about to take a 10-day
tour to romantic Tuscany.
165
00:09:37,276 --> 00:09:40,109
But I don't want Patti flying.
166
00:09:40,179 --> 00:09:42,010
Small sacrifice.
167
00:09:42,081 --> 00:09:45,482
We decided to change
our coach tickets
168
00:09:45,551 --> 00:09:49,487
into an upgraded ticket for you.
169
00:09:52,358 --> 00:09:54,326
Oh.
170
00:09:54,393 --> 00:09:56,623
This is amazing.
171
00:09:56,696 --> 00:09:57,890
Really generous.
172
00:09:57,964 --> 00:10:01,900
Thank you, but no.
173
00:10:01,968 --> 00:10:04,402
How can you say no to Tuscany?
174
00:10:04,470 --> 00:10:06,267
No.
Like that.
175
00:10:06,339 --> 00:10:08,500
That's your depression speaking.
176
00:10:08,574 --> 00:10:11,839
It doesn't speak Italian.
It speaks high-school French.
177
00:10:11,911 --> 00:10:13,344
Besides,
I'm not depressed anymore.
178
00:10:13,412 --> 00:10:16,711
Then what are you still doing
living with those losers?
179
00:10:16,816 --> 00:10:19,842
- Those are my people.
- That's not a place you live.
180
00:10:19,952 --> 00:10:21,544
Guys, come on.
181
00:10:22,722 --> 00:10:24,212
Thank you so much.
182
00:10:24,323 --> 00:10:28,555
But there is no way I can go
on a romantic tour of Tuscany.
183
00:10:28,628 --> 00:10:30,721
- I'm not ready to meet anyone.
- You won't.
184
00:10:30,796 --> 00:10:33,287
- We can assure you.
- Oh?
185
00:10:34,834 --> 00:10:37,496
It's a gay tour
of romantic Tuscany.
186
00:10:37,570 --> 00:10:39,902
So it would be
very relaxing for you.
187
00:10:39,972 --> 00:10:41,667
You know, mostly couples.
188
00:10:41,741 --> 00:10:44,505
No one would be there
to hit on you.
189
00:10:44,577 --> 00:10:48,240
And you could concentrate and
listen to your own inner voice.
190
00:10:48,347 --> 00:10:50,247
My inner voice?
191
00:10:50,349 --> 00:10:53,216
My inner voice
that would be saying,
192
00:10:53,285 --> 00:10:55,549
"What am I doing
on a gay tour of Tuscany?"
193
00:10:55,621 --> 00:10:58,715
Frances, it's Italy!
Italy.
194
00:10:58,791 --> 00:11:02,283
Plus, you could use it
as a time to start writing.
195
00:11:02,361 --> 00:11:06,127
Well, I'm busy. I have to
review all those books.
196
00:11:06,198 --> 00:11:08,894
Instead of working
on your own book.
197
00:11:08,968 --> 00:11:10,435
Wow.
198
00:11:10,503 --> 00:11:13,165
Are you being mean
or just hormonal?
199
00:11:13,239 --> 00:11:15,104
[ Buzzer ]
200
00:11:15,174 --> 00:11:18,974
Okay. Don't kill each other
until I get back.
201
00:11:22,615 --> 00:11:25,083
Can we please just talk
about the baby?
202
00:11:25,151 --> 00:11:26,982
I think you're in danger.
203
00:11:27,086 --> 00:11:28,644
Of?
204
00:11:28,754 --> 00:11:31,723
Of never recovering.
205
00:11:31,824 --> 00:11:35,988
You know when you come across
one of those empty-shell people?
206
00:11:36,062 --> 00:11:39,657
And you think,
"What the hell happened to you?"
207
00:11:39,732 --> 00:11:43,031
Well, there came a time
in each one of those lives
208
00:11:43,102 --> 00:11:44,967
where they were at a crossroads.
209
00:11:45,037 --> 00:11:47,870
Crossroads.
God, that is so "Oprah."
210
00:11:47,940 --> 00:11:51,876
Someplace where they had to
decide to turn left or right.
211
00:11:51,944 --> 00:11:54,640
This is no time to be
a chickenshit, Frances.
212
00:11:54,747 --> 00:11:56,476
I'm not being a chickenshit.
213
00:11:56,549 --> 00:11:57,914
I'm not.
214
00:11:57,983 --> 00:12:00,474
Okay, promise me
you'll think about it.
215
00:12:00,586 --> 00:12:02,383
I'll think about it.
216
00:12:02,455 --> 00:12:03,786
Okay.
217
00:12:04,890 --> 00:12:07,017
MAN:
I got a feeling about you.
218
00:12:07,093 --> 00:12:09,960
- Are you looking for a place?
- Yeah, I guess.
219
00:12:10,029 --> 00:12:12,259
- You getting a divorce?
- What?
220
00:12:12,331 --> 00:12:14,026
We got short-term apartments.
221
00:12:14,100 --> 00:12:16,068
But don't worry.
Some stay for years.
222
00:12:16,135 --> 00:12:18,729
We got a writer.
We got a doctor.
223
00:12:18,804 --> 00:12:21,364
The doctor could help you
straighten out your life.
224
00:12:21,440 --> 00:12:23,499
[ Man crying ]
225
00:12:30,983 --> 00:12:32,450
Hey!
226
00:12:32,518 --> 00:12:33,610
Sorry.
227
00:12:33,686 --> 00:12:36,211
It's okay.
228
00:12:36,288 --> 00:12:39,689
- Do you want to come over?
- No!
229
00:12:39,759 --> 00:12:43,058
[ Crying ]
230
00:12:43,129 --> 00:12:44,892
Maybe later.
231
00:12:50,870 --> 00:12:53,464
Maybe later.
Oh!
232
00:13:10,723 --> 00:13:11,747
Hello?
233
00:13:11,824 --> 00:13:14,725
Patti, when do I leave?
234
00:13:22,268 --> 00:13:25,101
Hi, I'm David.
This is your driver, Eduardo.
235
00:13:25,171 --> 00:13:28,106
And you are "Gay & Away"!
236
00:13:30,609 --> 00:13:35,410
And welcome to your first day
of a romantic tour of Tuscany.
237
00:13:35,514 --> 00:13:39,109
Now, I saw most of you getting
to know each other on the plane.
238
00:13:39,218 --> 00:13:42,085
But I wanted to make sure
you've all met Frances.
239
00:13:42,154 --> 00:13:43,883
WOMAN:
Hey, Frances.
240
00:13:43,956 --> 00:13:46,356
- Now, Frances is straight.
- Oh, poor girl.
241
00:13:46,425 --> 00:13:48,723
And she just survived
a terrible divorce.
242
00:13:48,794 --> 00:13:52,025
And according to her friend
Patti, she needs our support.
243
00:13:52,097 --> 00:13:58,058
So, Frances, why don't you stand
up, and let everyone say hello?
244
00:13:59,038 --> 00:14:01,199
No.
Come on.
245
00:14:01,273 --> 00:14:02,205
Hi!
246
00:14:02,274 --> 00:14:05,266
You're the bachelor, Frances.
Have some fun!
247
00:14:08,547 --> 00:14:11,880
Okay, everyone,
follow the flower.
248
00:14:11,951 --> 00:14:14,943
Good God, I cannot believe
it is raining.
249
00:14:15,054 --> 00:14:18,990
Okay, everyone, we're here!
Yeah! Okay!
250
00:14:19,091 --> 00:14:20,991
Oops.
Sorry.
251
00:14:30,502 --> 00:14:33,801
DAVID: You're empty.
You need a little more?
252
00:14:33,873 --> 00:14:35,704
Whoo!
You want more wine?
253
00:14:35,774 --> 00:14:38,538
- Little more vino?
- Excuse me.
254
00:14:38,611 --> 00:14:41,876
- Can a black gal get a drink?
- Yes, she can.
255
00:14:41,981 --> 00:14:44,415
Frances, little more?
256
00:14:44,483 --> 00:14:45,381
Mm-hmm.
257
00:14:45,451 --> 00:14:48,511
You've got to loosen up, honey.
We having a party!
258
00:15:33,132 --> 00:15:34,360
Buongiorno.
259
00:15:34,433 --> 00:15:36,867
[ Speaking Italian ]
260
00:15:37,903 --> 00:15:39,598
Si.
261
00:15:50,716 --> 00:15:53,514
- [ Speaking Italian ]
- What?
262
00:15:53,619 --> 00:15:55,314
[ Speaking Italian ]
263
00:16:35,127 --> 00:16:37,459
RODNE Y:
Pretty awesome, isn't it?
264
00:16:38,397 --> 00:16:41,457
Yes, I think you could say that.
265
00:16:41,533 --> 00:16:44,058
Pretty awesome.
266
00:16:44,136 --> 00:16:47,105
God, how am I gonna get
through all of these?
267
00:16:47,172 --> 00:16:50,164
I mean, how do you begin
to describe all of this?
268
00:16:50,976 --> 00:16:53,604
If you have a pen,
I could write it for you.
269
00:16:53,712 --> 00:16:55,680
Are you a good writer?
270
00:16:57,282 --> 00:16:59,682
I used to be.
271
00:16:59,752 --> 00:17:00,650
All right.
272
00:17:00,719 --> 00:17:03,313
Well, have a go.
273
00:17:04,990 --> 00:17:05,957
To my mom.
274
00:17:06,025 --> 00:17:07,549
Dear Mom.
275
00:17:10,195 --> 00:17:12,720
FRANCE S:
Dear Mom.
276
00:17:12,798 --> 00:17:15,164
It's market day in Cortona.
277
00:17:15,234 --> 00:17:20,262
The piazza is an ongoing party,
and everyone is invited.
278
00:17:21,340 --> 00:17:24,173
Clich�s converge
at this navel of the world.
279
00:17:24,276 --> 00:17:27,439
You almost want to laugh,
but you can't help feeling
280
00:17:27,546 --> 00:17:31,482
these Italians know more
about having fun than we do.
281
00:17:31,550 --> 00:17:33,347
I eat a hot grape
from the market,
282
00:17:33,419 --> 00:17:36,149
and the violet sweetness
breaks open in my mouth.
283
00:17:36,221 --> 00:17:38,781
It even smells purple.
284
00:17:38,857 --> 00:17:42,554
I wish I could stay longer, but
the bell reminds me of time.
285
00:17:42,628 --> 00:17:47,998
"Ding-dang-dong," the bell
says, instead of "ding-dong."
286
00:17:48,067 --> 00:17:50,865
- I wish you were here.
- Love...
287
00:17:52,037 --> 00:17:53,561
Rodney.
288
00:17:55,774 --> 00:17:57,105
Thanks.
289
00:18:02,414 --> 00:18:04,473
"It even smells like purple"?
290
00:18:04,583 --> 00:18:06,517
My mom will never believe
I wrote this.
291
00:18:06,585 --> 00:18:10,419
Keep it.
"Ding-dang-dong goes the bell."
292
00:18:11,757 --> 00:18:13,315
I'm sorry.
293
00:18:32,711 --> 00:18:34,008
Bramasole.
294
00:18:34,079 --> 00:18:35,569
"Bramasole."
295
00:18:35,647 --> 00:18:37,376
[ Speaking Italian ]
296
00:18:41,120 --> 00:18:45,250
It's a nice little villa.
Rather run-down, but redeemable.
297
00:18:45,324 --> 00:18:47,121
Are you going to buy it?
298
00:18:47,192 --> 00:18:48,352
No, no, no.
299
00:18:48,427 --> 00:18:51,419
I'm just a tourist
here for the day.
300
00:18:51,497 --> 00:18:53,328
So?
301
00:18:53,398 --> 00:18:56,367
Well, who wouldn't want to buy
a villa in Tuscany?
302
00:18:56,435 --> 00:19:03,568
But the way my life's been going
that would be a terrible idea.
303
00:19:03,642 --> 00:19:04,973
A terrible idea.
304
00:19:05,043 --> 00:19:07,375
Mm-hmm.
305
00:19:07,446 --> 00:19:09,744
Don't you just love those?
306
00:19:37,276 --> 00:19:39,938
Sorry, everybody.
Unscheduled stop.
307
00:19:40,012 --> 00:19:43,778
Look at the sheep.
Oh, my gosh.
308
00:20:10,275 --> 00:20:12,766
Stop the bus!
309
00:20:12,844 --> 00:20:15,210
Stop the bus!
310
00:20:52,584 --> 00:20:53,551
[ Knocking ]
311
00:20:53,619 --> 00:20:55,177
Hello?
312
00:20:57,556 --> 00:20:59,183
Hello?
313
00:21:03,128 --> 00:21:04,755
Shit.
314
00:21:25,951 --> 00:21:27,441
Oh, excuse me.
315
00:21:27,552 --> 00:21:29,520
Oh, I'm sorry.
[ Speaking Italian ]
316
00:21:29,588 --> 00:21:30,885
Can I help you, signora?
317
00:21:30,956 --> 00:21:33,982
Yes, I thought
the house was for sale.
318
00:21:34,059 --> 00:21:36,823
Oh, no.
The house is for sale.
319
00:21:36,895 --> 00:21:40,058
But, unfortunately,
someone's already buying it.
320
00:21:40,132 --> 00:21:43,693
We like it very much,
and we'll buy it today.
321
00:21:43,769 --> 00:21:46,932
Very good.
One moment please.
322
00:21:47,005 --> 00:21:48,472
Excuse me.
323
00:21:50,309 --> 00:21:53,472
They want it.
They agree on the price.
324
00:21:53,545 --> 00:21:57,242
So soon?
Then we asked too little.
325
00:21:57,349 --> 00:21:59,647
Ask for 20 million lire more,
at least.
326
00:21:59,718 --> 00:22:01,709
[ Bell ringing ]
327
00:22:01,820 --> 00:22:03,879
I'm sorry.
328
00:22:03,955 --> 00:22:05,081
I'm sorry.
329
00:22:05,190 --> 00:22:08,318
I'm afraid that there has
been a change in the price.
330
00:22:09,461 --> 00:22:11,895
It is now 20 million lire
more expensive.
331
00:22:11,963 --> 00:22:14,796
WOMAN: Why? It didn't get
more valuable in five minutes.
332
00:22:14,866 --> 00:22:17,300
The contessa feels
she has asked too little
333
00:22:17,369 --> 00:22:18,631
since you agreed to buy it.
334
00:22:18,704 --> 00:22:20,604
MAN:
That logic is absurd.
335
00:22:20,672 --> 00:22:22,663
Excuse me?
336
00:22:22,741 --> 00:22:25,972
What is the price?
337
00:22:26,044 --> 00:22:27,944
Are you bidding against us?
338
00:22:28,013 --> 00:22:30,846
Wait.
We accept the new price.
339
00:22:30,916 --> 00:22:33,316
No, this is a beautiful house.
340
00:22:33,418 --> 00:22:36,615
And whoever wants it
has to pay double.
341
00:22:36,722 --> 00:22:39,782
The contessa says that
342
00:22:39,858 --> 00:22:42,827
since there is so much
interest in the house,
343
00:22:42,894 --> 00:22:45,124
the price is now double.
344
00:22:45,197 --> 00:22:46,755
Since the last 10 seconds?
345
00:22:46,832 --> 00:22:48,197
Normale.
346
00:22:50,035 --> 00:22:53,163
You greedy Americans.
You think you're so entitled.
347
00:22:53,238 --> 00:22:55,069
You ruin everything.
348
00:22:55,140 --> 00:22:57,301
A lot of us feel
really badly about that.
349
00:22:57,376 --> 00:23:00,868
We're going.
We'll look in Provence.
350
00:23:00,946 --> 00:23:01,878
Fascists!
351
00:23:03,949 --> 00:23:06,577
And her?
How much will she pay?
352
00:23:07,619 --> 00:23:09,109
We'll see.
353
00:23:09,221 --> 00:23:11,280
Is it really double the price?
354
00:23:11,390 --> 00:23:13,381
[ Speaking Italian ]
355
00:23:15,727 --> 00:23:18,195
I can't pay double the price.
356
00:23:19,030 --> 00:23:21,498
But please tell the contessa
357
00:23:21,566 --> 00:23:27,937
that this is what I got for
my house recently in dollars.
358
00:23:28,006 --> 00:23:30,406
[ Speaking Italian ]
359
00:23:30,475 --> 00:23:33,137
Minus the work on the place.
360
00:23:35,313 --> 00:23:37,543
Hammers, buckets.
361
00:23:39,351 --> 00:23:41,012
Men.
362
00:23:41,119 --> 00:23:42,711
Chocolate.
363
00:23:44,756 --> 00:23:47,418
And a rental car
to drive off a cliff
364
00:23:47,492 --> 00:23:50,723
when this all turns out
to have been a terrible mistake.
365
00:23:50,796 --> 00:23:52,855
That's what I can pay.
366
00:23:52,931 --> 00:23:55,764
Signora.
367
00:23:55,834 --> 00:23:57,597
You've not even seen the house.
368
00:23:57,669 --> 00:23:59,102
Oh.
369
00:24:00,539 --> 00:24:02,268
Well.
370
00:24:05,076 --> 00:24:06,600
Well, I...
371
00:24:08,180 --> 00:24:12,378
I can't go back
to San Francisco.
372
00:24:13,485 --> 00:24:15,578
CONTESSA:
No.
373
00:24:15,687 --> 00:24:16,619
No.
374
00:24:16,688 --> 00:24:18,155
I'm sorry, signora.
375
00:24:18,223 --> 00:24:20,851
The contessa's family lived here
for generations,
376
00:24:20,926 --> 00:24:26,296
so understandably it is
very difficult for her to sell.
377
00:24:26,364 --> 00:24:28,662
Money is not the only issue.
She needs--
378
00:24:28,733 --> 00:24:31,463
[ Speaking Italian ]
379
00:24:31,536 --> 00:24:33,401
A sign.
380
00:24:33,472 --> 00:24:36,635
I understand.
I believe in signs, too.
381
00:24:37,609 --> 00:24:41,045
Well, thank you.
Thank you.
382
00:24:47,686 --> 00:24:48,618
Oh!
383
00:24:48,687 --> 00:24:50,552
- Oh.
- Oh.
384
00:24:50,622 --> 00:24:51,611
Please.
385
00:24:51,690 --> 00:24:53,681
[ Speaking Italian ]
386
00:24:55,627 --> 00:24:58,289
What did she say?
387
00:24:58,363 --> 00:25:01,526
In Italy, what happened to you
is a very good sign.
388
00:25:01,600 --> 00:25:02,965
- It is?
- Yes.
389
00:25:03,034 --> 00:25:05,867
And now... would you
like to see the house?
390
00:25:05,937 --> 00:25:09,065
First, we open an account.
Then you transfer the money.
391
00:25:09,140 --> 00:25:12,132
Here is the legal description.
"Two oxen, two days."
392
00:25:12,210 --> 00:25:13,871
- I'm sorry.
- It's old-fashioned.
393
00:25:13,945 --> 00:25:17,506
The land is measured by
how long it would take two oxen
394
00:25:17,582 --> 00:25:18,571
to plow it.
395
00:25:18,683 --> 00:25:22,175
Oh.
Oh, that makes sense.
396
00:25:28,860 --> 00:25:30,122
Just like that?
397
00:25:30,195 --> 00:25:32,789
Before the money's
been transferred?
398
00:25:32,864 --> 00:25:34,593
It's a house, not a Vespa.
399
00:25:34,666 --> 00:25:37,100
What are you going to do,
steal it?
400
00:25:37,168 --> 00:25:40,899
Besides, Signor Martini
likes you.
401
00:25:54,819 --> 00:25:57,982
Okay. We'll take care
of the rest later.
402
00:25:58,089 --> 00:25:58,714
Normale.
403
00:25:58,790 --> 00:26:00,121
Normale?
404
00:26:00,191 --> 00:26:00,850
Normale.
405
00:26:00,926 --> 00:26:02,359
Normale.
406
00:26:05,163 --> 00:26:08,360
FRANCE S: I have bought a house
in a foreign country.
407
00:26:08,433 --> 00:26:12,392
A house and the land it takes
two o xen two days to plow.
408
00:26:12,470 --> 00:26:13,869
Not having a plow or an o x,
409
00:26:13,939 --> 00:26:16,169
I'll have to take their word
on that.
410
00:26:16,241 --> 00:26:18,971
Buyer's remorse is
a very common affliction
411
00:26:19,077 --> 00:26:20,339
among new homeowners.
412
00:26:20,412 --> 00:26:24,041
Just because you have
a sudden urge to weep,
413
00:26:24,149 --> 00:26:26,617
that doesn't mean
you've made a mistake.
414
00:26:26,685 --> 00:26:29,779
Everybody knows old houses
have their quirks.
415
00:26:31,356 --> 00:26:33,950
Especially 300-year-old houses.
416
00:26:35,560 --> 00:26:42,659
I have inherited 10, 000
empty wine bottles, one grape,
417
00:26:42,734 --> 00:26:46,431
every issue of "La Nazione"
printed in 1958,
418
00:26:46,504 --> 00:26:49,564
and assorted previous tenants.
419
00:26:50,575 --> 00:26:53,169
Ugh! [ Screaming ]
420
00:27:01,086 --> 00:27:03,748
[ Girl crying ]
421
00:27:06,458 --> 00:27:10,485
The trick to overcoming buyer's
remorse is to have a plan.
422
00:27:10,562 --> 00:27:13,429
Pick one room
and make it yours.
423
00:27:13,498 --> 00:27:15,966
Go slowly through the house.
424
00:27:16,034 --> 00:27:18,867
Be polite, introduce yourself,
425
00:27:18,937 --> 00:27:21,735
so it can introduce itself
to you.
426
00:27:24,876 --> 00:27:26,969
You did what?
427
00:27:27,078 --> 00:27:29,376
Frances bought a house
in Tuscany!
428
00:27:29,481 --> 00:27:31,176
And you're gonna
live there alone?
429
00:27:31,282 --> 00:27:34,774
Well, I'm not there alone.
I'm there with bugs.
430
00:27:34,886 --> 00:27:37,684
- How's the belly?
- It's growing.
431
00:27:37,756 --> 00:27:41,248
I can't believe you did this.
Did you already sign?
432
00:27:41,326 --> 00:27:43,294
Yes.
433
00:27:43,361 --> 00:27:46,558
Why? What?
You think I shouldn't have?
434
00:27:46,631 --> 00:27:48,758
Are you telling me
I made a mistake?
435
00:27:48,833 --> 00:27:51,393
- I don't know. Did you?
- Well, I don't know.
436
00:27:51,469 --> 00:27:54,996
You're the one who made
the "empty-shell person" speech.
437
00:27:55,073 --> 00:27:57,041
Oh, yeah.
That was me.
438
00:27:57,108 --> 00:27:59,269
Okay. Wow!
439
00:27:59,344 --> 00:28:01,005
You bought a villa in Tuscany!
440
00:28:01,079 --> 00:28:04,173
- So, what's the place like?
- It needs a little work.
441
00:28:04,249 --> 00:28:06,308
- Well, who's gonna do it?
- I am.
442
00:28:06,418 --> 00:28:07,146
You are?
443
00:28:07,218 --> 00:28:09,277
I never realized
you were so handy.
444
00:28:09,387 --> 00:28:12,117
I can do things.
Remember, I fixed that drain?
445
00:28:12,190 --> 00:28:14,590
The drain in your kitchen?
No, that was me.
446
00:28:14,659 --> 00:28:16,820
I handed you the rubber thingy.
447
00:28:16,895 --> 00:28:20,353
The plunger?
That was Tom.
448
00:28:20,432 --> 00:28:23,492
I can't believe it.
Why did you just say his name?
449
00:28:23,568 --> 00:28:26,662
I'm sorry.
I forgot. I'm sorry.
450
00:28:26,738 --> 00:28:29,263
I can make this work.
You know?
451
00:28:29,340 --> 00:28:33,208
Of course I didn't mean I was
gonna do all the work myself.
452
00:28:33,278 --> 00:28:35,542
I can hire the descendents
of Roman gods
453
00:28:35,647 --> 00:28:37,080
to do the heavy lifting.
454
00:28:37,182 --> 00:28:39,650
Then, just supervise,
tell them what to do.
455
00:28:39,718 --> 00:28:42,312
So, have you met him yet?
456
00:28:42,420 --> 00:28:44,581
- Who?
- The guy you're gonna meet.
457
00:28:44,689 --> 00:28:46,680
Patti, please.
458
00:28:46,791 --> 00:28:48,383
You know what?
459
00:28:48,460 --> 00:28:50,826
It's starting to rain here
a little bit.
460
00:28:50,895 --> 00:28:53,455
- So I think I have to go now.
- Wait, Fran.
461
00:28:53,531 --> 00:28:55,658
I want you to kiss
the belly for me.
462
00:28:55,734 --> 00:28:57,099
- Fran.
- Bye-bye.
463
00:28:57,168 --> 00:28:59,295
[ Click, dial tone ]
464
00:28:59,370 --> 00:29:01,270
Can you Star-69 Italy?
465
00:29:01,339 --> 00:29:02,306
No.
466
00:29:02,373 --> 00:29:04,034
I'm gonna try.
467
00:29:07,645 --> 00:29:08,236
Hello?
468
00:29:08,346 --> 00:29:09,813
[ Thunder crashes ]
469
00:29:12,751 --> 00:29:14,116
Okay.
470
00:29:24,395 --> 00:29:26,260
One 1,000,
471
00:29:26,331 --> 00:29:28,128
- 2-- Aah!
- [ Thunder crashes ]
472
00:29:28,199 --> 00:29:29,291
Jesus!
473
00:29:29,367 --> 00:29:31,631
[ Humming Tchaikovsky's
"1812 Overture" ]
474
00:29:33,605 --> 00:29:35,334
Okay.
475
00:29:49,320 --> 00:29:52,346
[ Hinges squeaking,
wind whistling ]
476
00:30:11,442 --> 00:30:12,739
Stop it.
477
00:30:13,711 --> 00:30:16,771
- Stop it.
- [ Screeching ]
478
00:30:20,785 --> 00:30:21,979
Oh, my God.
479
00:30:22,086 --> 00:30:24,611
Oh, my God.
480
00:30:24,722 --> 00:30:28,715
You're gonna be okay.
You're safe here.
481
00:30:30,528 --> 00:30:33,361
Just don't fly around, okay?
You'll freak me out.
482
00:30:33,431 --> 00:30:36,195
[ Cries ]
483
00:30:36,267 --> 00:30:38,132
Oh, God.
484
00:30:49,848 --> 00:30:50,974
Signora?
485
00:30:51,049 --> 00:30:53,017
[ Knock on door ]
486
00:30:53,084 --> 00:30:55,348
Signora Mayes?
487
00:30:55,420 --> 00:30:57,285
Buongiorno.
488
00:31:00,058 --> 00:31:02,185
I see you have survived
the storm.
489
00:31:02,260 --> 00:31:07,698
I'm alive.
But the washing machine is dead.
490
00:31:07,765 --> 00:31:10,563
Yes.
It was electrocuted.
491
00:31:10,635 --> 00:31:12,830
I'm happy to see
that you were not.
492
00:31:15,073 --> 00:31:19,908
You came to check on me?
493
00:31:19,978 --> 00:31:23,971
You're meeting the contractors
today, and I came to help you.
494
00:31:24,082 --> 00:31:25,640
I believe one of them is here.
495
00:31:25,750 --> 00:31:27,411
Here?
496
00:31:27,485 --> 00:31:28,611
Downstairs.
497
00:31:34,826 --> 00:31:36,316
Oh.
498
00:31:36,394 --> 00:31:39,659
Oh, yeah.
He's here.
499
00:31:39,731 --> 00:31:42,427
I was hoping to take
this wall down
500
00:31:42,500 --> 00:31:45,697
and return these two small rooms
into one big room.
501
00:31:45,770 --> 00:31:47,738
Oh, wonderful.
502
00:31:47,805 --> 00:31:49,466
You should have been
an architect.
503
00:31:49,540 --> 00:31:52,703
You have excellent taste.
504
00:31:52,777 --> 00:31:54,745
So, do you think it can be done?
505
00:31:54,779 --> 00:31:57,475
Hidden pipes, a week.
506
00:31:57,548 --> 00:31:59,948
The bathrooms, 3 days.
507
00:32:00,018 --> 00:32:03,078
Signora, give me
the keys of this place,
508
00:32:03,154 --> 00:32:06,954
and in one month, I will give
you the keys to your palace.
509
00:32:07,025 --> 00:32:09,323
Just...
510
00:32:10,361 --> 00:32:12,659
Just leave it to me.
511
00:32:12,730 --> 00:32:15,563
[ Sighs, speaking Italian ]
512
00:32:20,605 --> 00:32:23,369
Boom! Boom! Boom!
513
00:32:23,441 --> 00:32:25,272
Oh.
514
00:32:28,579 --> 00:32:30,012
Oh!
515
00:32:30,114 --> 00:32:32,912
[ Speaks Italian ]
516
00:32:32,984 --> 00:32:34,417
[ Thud ]
517
00:32:40,024 --> 00:32:42,857
[ Speaking Italian ]
518
00:32:42,927 --> 00:32:45,760
He says he fixed it himself
many years ago.
519
00:32:45,830 --> 00:32:47,593
Really?
520
00:32:47,665 --> 00:32:50,395
Oh. You want to see
the rest of the house?
521
00:32:50,468 --> 00:32:52,459
Okay.
Yes, yes.
522
00:32:54,072 --> 00:32:57,235
[ Speaking Italian ]
523
00:32:57,308 --> 00:32:59,367
He suggest that
he rebuild the wall.
524
00:32:59,444 --> 00:33:01,571
[ Speaking Italian ]
525
00:33:01,679 --> 00:33:04,876
It is important for the
structure of the garden.
526
00:33:04,949 --> 00:33:08,009
- [ Speaking Italian ]
- He has a team of experts.
527
00:33:08,119 --> 00:33:09,450
[ Whistles ]
528
00:33:16,461 --> 00:33:17,655
Buongiorno.
529
00:33:17,729 --> 00:33:19,754
Hello, miss.
530
00:33:19,831 --> 00:33:22,595
We are not Italian.
We are from Polonia.
531
00:33:22,667 --> 00:33:25,227
Poland. Oh.
Do you all speak English?
532
00:33:25,303 --> 00:33:28,795
Only me.
And only a little.
533
00:33:28,873 --> 00:33:29,931
I am Pawel.
534
00:33:30,008 --> 00:33:32,568
Oh, Pawel.
Nice to meet you.
535
00:33:34,112 --> 00:33:35,101
Buongiorno.
536
00:33:35,179 --> 00:33:36,373
Jerzy.
537
00:33:36,481 --> 00:33:37,812
Jerzy.
538
00:33:40,385 --> 00:33:41,716
Hello.
539
00:33:43,254 --> 00:33:44,380
Zbignew.
540
00:33:44,455 --> 00:33:45,979
Zbignew.
541
00:33:46,891 --> 00:33:48,654
Frances.
542
00:33:51,629 --> 00:33:53,096
What do you think of Nino?
543
00:33:53,164 --> 00:33:57,032
I know his mother.
If he does a bad job, he's...
544
00:33:57,101 --> 00:33:58,728
Well, then.
545
00:34:00,071 --> 00:34:01,732
Okay. Yes.
546
00:34:01,806 --> 00:34:02,738
Okay. Yes.
547
00:34:02,807 --> 00:34:04,399
Yes, yes.
548
00:34:11,149 --> 00:34:13,310
Okay. Yes.
549
00:34:15,520 --> 00:34:18,455
[ Grunting ]
550
00:34:36,507 --> 00:34:39,203
See, Frances?
No problem.
551
00:34:43,081 --> 00:34:44,742
Nino!
552
00:34:44,816 --> 00:34:46,283
Oh, God!
553
00:34:46,350 --> 00:34:47,817
[ Shouts in Italian ]
554
00:34:47,919 --> 00:34:50,387
Run! Oh!
Aah!
555
00:34:50,455 --> 00:34:52,514
[ Wall crumbling ]
556
00:34:56,594 --> 00:34:59,085
[ Silence ]
557
00:35:02,700 --> 00:35:05,032
[ Wall crumbling ]
558
00:35:14,312 --> 00:35:16,678
Okay. Yes.
559
00:35:31,729 --> 00:35:33,458
[ Speaks Polish ]
560
00:35:33,531 --> 00:35:35,123
Kurwa mac!
561
00:35:35,199 --> 00:35:38,134
"Kurwa mac"
means "holy shit" in Polish.
562
00:35:38,202 --> 00:35:40,693
I learned that that day.
563
00:35:40,771 --> 00:35:43,069
The fact I'm trying to speak
Polish in Italy
564
00:35:43,141 --> 00:35:46,599
is just one of the many
surprises around here.
565
00:35:51,816 --> 00:35:53,613
Is he a licensed electrician?
566
00:35:53,718 --> 00:35:56,653
No. He's a licensed
literature professor.
567
00:35:57,655 --> 00:35:58,622
Oh.
568
00:36:02,693 --> 00:36:05,253
Czeslaw Milosz.
569
00:36:06,998 --> 00:36:08,397
I like him.
570
00:36:08,466 --> 00:36:10,457
Czeslaw Milosz.
571
00:36:15,406 --> 00:36:19,365
It is only natural getting to
know people should take time.
572
00:36:21,879 --> 00:36:25,542
Every day I watch for
the old man with the flowers.
573
00:36:30,087 --> 00:36:34,751
And I wonder, was he born here?
574
00:36:35,326 --> 00:36:37,157
Did he love someone here?
575
00:36:38,229 --> 00:36:40,493
Did he lose someone here?
576
00:36:47,905 --> 00:36:51,864
He doesn't seem as curious
about me, but that's all right.
577
00:36:53,211 --> 00:36:56,874
These days, I'm something
of a loner myself.
578
00:37:00,685 --> 00:37:03,483
I'm pretty good
at staying entertained.
579
00:37:03,554 --> 00:37:06,045
Mostly, I like to hang out
at a bar I know
580
00:37:06,157 --> 00:37:08,990
conveniently located
in my backyard.
581
00:37:10,895 --> 00:37:14,228
Fortunately, there are things
here you can't do alone.
582
00:37:14,298 --> 00:37:17,028
It's my neighbor Placido who's
teaching me about olives.
583
00:37:17,101 --> 00:37:18,796
Today is okay.
584
00:37:18,869 --> 00:37:22,134
But never pick
when it's wet, huh?
585
00:37:22,206 --> 00:37:23,673
Okay.
586
00:37:23,741 --> 00:37:25,208
These look good.
587
00:37:29,747 --> 00:37:30,941
Oh, my God.
588
00:37:31,048 --> 00:37:32,879
- Pap�!
- Si?
589
00:37:32,950 --> 00:37:35,578
- I'm finished.
- Good. Gather up the net.
590
00:37:36,254 --> 00:37:38,017
Okay.
591
00:37:54,972 --> 00:37:56,963
- Chiara!
- Si?
592
00:37:57,041 --> 00:37:59,168
Go and see
if Gianni needs some help.
593
00:38:00,044 --> 00:38:01,238
Okay.
594
00:38:01,345 --> 00:38:03,108
Go, go.
595
00:38:05,316 --> 00:38:06,544
Ciao.
596
00:38:08,486 --> 00:38:10,716
Oops!
597
00:38:10,788 --> 00:38:12,915
Everything okay?
598
00:38:12,990 --> 00:38:14,321
Si.
599
00:38:15,559 --> 00:38:16,992
Grazie.
600
00:38:22,633 --> 00:38:25,067
Francesca?
Are you busy tonight?
601
00:38:25,136 --> 00:38:26,398
No.
602
00:38:26,470 --> 00:38:29,303
Then come to dinner.
It's unhealthy to eat alone.
603
00:38:45,823 --> 00:38:47,791
[ Crying ]
604
00:38:49,627 --> 00:38:52,323
Stop it, Mom.
It's embarrassing.
605
00:38:52,396 --> 00:38:54,728
- Is she okay?
- Of course. She's fine.
606
00:38:54,799 --> 00:38:57,131
Mama, that's enough.
607
00:38:57,201 --> 00:39:01,069
My granny's very sensitive.
608
00:39:01,138 --> 00:39:03,231
She cries all day.
609
00:39:06,344 --> 00:39:08,869
Are we celebrating
something in particular?
610
00:39:08,946 --> 00:39:10,743
Gratitude to the saints
for saving us
611
00:39:10,848 --> 00:39:15,148
from droughts, mad dogs,
and glandular disorders.
612
00:39:15,252 --> 00:39:17,777
Good evening, everybody.
Sorry I'm late.
613
00:39:17,888 --> 00:39:19,913
Katherine!
Hand me your hat.
614
00:39:20,024 --> 00:39:22,151
Do you like it?
615
00:39:22,927 --> 00:39:26,124
I suppose it wasn't a terrible
idea, buying a villa.
616
00:39:26,197 --> 00:39:30,224
Are you up there all alone?
No lord and master, no consort?
617
00:39:30,301 --> 00:39:33,168
No.
Do you have one?
618
00:39:33,237 --> 00:39:35,501
One? Ha!
619
00:39:39,577 --> 00:39:41,602
[ Grandmother speaks Italian ]
620
00:39:41,679 --> 00:39:43,909
I knew this would happen.
Remember?
621
00:39:43,981 --> 00:39:44,879
Don't blame me.
622
00:39:44,949 --> 00:39:47,417
I told him not to get her
that computer.
623
00:39:47,518 --> 00:39:51,682
She got an e-mail lover,
you see, from Ecuador.
624
00:39:51,756 --> 00:39:54,657
Finally, she had to
tell him her age.
625
00:39:55,292 --> 00:39:58,455
No mail!
626
00:39:58,529 --> 00:40:00,463
You had it coming.
627
00:40:00,531 --> 00:40:03,295
You're wrong.
I hurt in my heart.
628
00:40:03,367 --> 00:40:06,734
Even though I'm old,
my heart still aches.
629
00:40:06,804 --> 00:40:08,601
I'm so sorry.
630
00:40:13,811 --> 00:40:16,041
- L'amore.
- Si.
631
00:40:16,113 --> 00:40:17,910
[ Speaks Italian ]
632
00:40:17,982 --> 00:40:19,711
Si.
633
00:40:19,784 --> 00:40:21,752
- [ Speaks Italian ]
- Hmm?
634
00:40:21,819 --> 00:40:23,514
[ Speaks Italian ]
635
00:40:23,621 --> 00:40:24,451
Celibe?
636
00:40:24,522 --> 00:40:26,183
Celibe.
637
00:40:27,324 --> 00:40:28,450
Celibate?
638
00:40:28,526 --> 00:40:30,357
- Celibate!
- Si.
639
00:40:32,396 --> 00:40:34,990
No. I mean...
640
00:40:35,065 --> 00:40:41,163
Well, actually, I have to admit
it has been a while.
641
00:40:41,238 --> 00:40:43,604
"Celibe" in Italian
means "single."
642
00:40:43,674 --> 00:40:45,801
He's not asking
when you last had sex.
643
00:40:45,876 --> 00:40:49,039
He's asking whether or not
you're married.
644
00:40:49,146 --> 00:40:51,239
Thank you.
645
00:40:51,348 --> 00:40:54,010
No, I'm not.
646
00:40:55,219 --> 00:40:59,952
- Everything all right, darling?
- Oh, terrific. I'm just eating.
647
00:41:00,458 --> 00:41:02,426
He is.
648
00:41:05,796 --> 00:41:07,491
Oh, my God.
649
00:41:07,932 --> 00:41:10,059
- I feel like such an idiot.
- Don't.
650
00:41:10,134 --> 00:41:13,399
Flirting's a ritual in Italy.
Just enjoy it.
651
00:41:13,471 --> 00:41:15,803
Taste this.
It's gorgeous.
652
00:41:17,208 --> 00:41:18,573
Mmm!
653
00:41:19,710 --> 00:41:22,338
- How do you do it?
- Do what?
654
00:41:22,413 --> 00:41:24,074
This.
655
00:41:24,181 --> 00:41:27,810
Well, hats make me happy.
656
00:41:27,918 --> 00:41:29,613
And ice cream.
657
00:41:29,687 --> 00:41:32,417
Ice cream changed my fate.
658
00:41:32,490 --> 00:41:34,151
It was because of ice cream
659
00:41:34,225 --> 00:41:37,023
that my beloved Fefe
discovered me.
660
00:41:37,094 --> 00:41:38,254
Fefe?
661
00:41:38,329 --> 00:41:39,421
II Maestro.
662
00:41:39,497 --> 00:41:40,623
Who?
663
00:41:40,698 --> 00:41:43,132
Federico, darling.
664
00:41:43,200 --> 00:41:44,758
Fellini?
665
00:41:44,835 --> 00:41:48,635
He discovered me in the
Piazza Novena with my parents
666
00:41:48,706 --> 00:41:50,401
eating an ice cream.
667
00:41:50,474 --> 00:41:51,668
I was gobbling it down,
668
00:41:51,742 --> 00:41:55,109
letting it run all over my chin
because I was hungry.
669
00:41:55,179 --> 00:41:57,340
"Do you like ice cream?"
He asked me.
670
00:41:57,448 --> 00:42:01,179
I didn't know who he was.
I was 16.
671
00:42:01,252 --> 00:42:05,689
"You are my imagination
come to life," he told me.
672
00:42:07,391 --> 00:42:10,792
He wasn't just a great director.
He gave great advice.
673
00:42:10,861 --> 00:42:13,193
I'm listening.
674
00:42:13,264 --> 00:42:19,225
Fefe said you have to live
spherically in many directions.
675
00:42:19,303 --> 00:42:22,363
Never lose
your childish enthusiasm,
676
00:42:22,439 --> 00:42:25,101
and things will come your way.
677
00:42:30,814 --> 00:42:34,614
So now I was getting posthumous
advice from Il Maestro,
678
00:42:34,718 --> 00:42:36,811
and I tried to follow it
by pulling ivy,
679
00:42:36,887 --> 00:42:40,118
spherically
and with childish enthusiasm.
680
00:42:42,793 --> 00:42:44,761
Oh, my God.
681
00:42:54,572 --> 00:42:56,199
Niente qui.
682
00:42:59,543 --> 00:43:02,034
Niente.
Not here.
683
00:43:07,952 --> 00:43:10,011
Did you look under the bed?
684
00:43:16,594 --> 00:43:18,528
Could you look under the pillow?
685
00:43:23,467 --> 00:43:25,230
Huh!
686
00:43:25,302 --> 00:43:27,270
No.
It's a joke.
687
00:43:32,242 --> 00:43:34,210
Maybe he moved out already.
688
00:43:34,244 --> 00:43:37,304
Snakes are famous
for changing their minds.
689
00:43:42,486 --> 00:43:44,954
What am I doing here
all by myself?
690
00:43:46,023 --> 00:43:48,150
Don't you think it's strange?
691
00:43:48,225 --> 00:43:50,250
Me in this big house?
692
00:43:51,528 --> 00:43:53,257
Excuse me.
693
00:43:54,331 --> 00:43:55,798
I'm sorry.
694
00:44:03,407 --> 00:44:04,999
You are cold, Signora Mayes.
695
00:44:05,075 --> 00:44:06,406
Yeah.
696
00:44:07,578 --> 00:44:09,102
Thank you.
697
00:44:18,889 --> 00:44:23,087
Do you know the most surprising
thing about divorce?
698
00:44:23,160 --> 00:44:26,061
It doesn't actually kill you,
699
00:44:26,130 --> 00:44:30,863
like a bullet to the heart
or a head-on car wreck.
700
00:44:30,934 --> 00:44:32,492
It should.
701
00:44:33,837 --> 00:44:38,240
When someone you've promised to
cherish till death do you part
702
00:44:38,308 --> 00:44:43,211
says, "I never loved you,"
it should kill you instantly.
703
00:44:44,381 --> 00:44:47,475
You shouldn't have to wake up
day after day after that,
704
00:44:47,584 --> 00:44:51,350
trying to understand how
in the world you didn't know.
705
00:44:51,422 --> 00:44:54,357
The light just never went on,
you know.
706
00:44:54,425 --> 00:44:56,586
I must have have known,
of course,
707
00:44:56,660 --> 00:45:01,029
but I was too scared
to see the truth.
708
00:45:01,098 --> 00:45:04,329
Then fear just makes you
so stupid.
709
00:45:04,401 --> 00:45:06,995
No. It's not stupid,
Signora Mayes.
710
00:45:08,405 --> 00:45:09,838
L'amore � cieco.
711
00:45:09,907 --> 00:45:13,604
Oh, love is blind.
Yeah, we have that saying, too.
712
00:45:13,677 --> 00:45:18,171
Everybody has that saying
because it's true everywhere.
713
00:45:19,283 --> 00:45:21,581
I don't want to be blind
anymore.
714
00:45:22,619 --> 00:45:23,950
This house has three bedrooms.
715
00:45:24,021 --> 00:45:26,512
What if there's never anyone
to sleep in them?
716
00:45:27,458 --> 00:45:32,020
And the kitchen, what if there's
never anyone to cook for?
717
00:45:32,096 --> 00:45:34,826
I wake up in the night
thinking, "You idiot.
718
00:45:34,898 --> 00:45:37,731
I mean, you're the stupidest
woman in the world.
719
00:45:37,801 --> 00:45:41,396
You bought a house for a life
you don't even have."
720
00:45:44,308 --> 00:45:46,333
Why did you do it, then?
721
00:45:51,115 --> 00:45:53,413
Because I'm sick of being afraid
all the time
722
00:45:53,517 --> 00:45:56,213
and because I still want things.
723
00:45:56,320 --> 00:45:59,585
I want a wedding in this house,
724
00:45:59,656 --> 00:46:03,956
and I want a family
in this house.
725
00:46:09,032 --> 00:46:12,126
Signora,
between Austria and Italy,
726
00:46:12,202 --> 00:46:16,195
there is a section of the Alps
called the Semmering.
727
00:46:16,273 --> 00:46:19,970
It is an impossibly steep,
very high part of the mountains.
728
00:46:20,077 --> 00:46:22,375
They built a train track
over these Alps
729
00:46:22,479 --> 00:46:24,504
to connect Vienna and Venice.
730
00:46:24,581 --> 00:46:28,381
They built these tracks before
there was a train in existence
731
00:46:28,452 --> 00:46:30,420
that could make the trip.
732
00:46:32,089 --> 00:46:37,493
They built it because they knew
someday the train would come.
733
00:46:58,715 --> 00:47:02,617
I think your snake has gone
for the evening.
734
00:47:02,686 --> 00:47:04,745
Yes.
I think you're right.
735
00:47:11,628 --> 00:47:13,289
Signora.
736
00:47:14,531 --> 00:47:17,591
Please stop being so sad.
737
00:47:17,668 --> 00:47:19,135
If you continue like this,
738
00:47:19,203 --> 00:47:22,263
I will be forced
to make love to you.
739
00:47:22,339 --> 00:47:25,638
And I've never been unfaithful
to my wife.
740
00:47:38,455 --> 00:47:39,945
Buonanotte, signora.
741
00:47:40,057 --> 00:47:42,048
Yes.
Buonanotte, Signor Martini.
742
00:47:42,125 --> 00:47:44,184
Grazie.
743
00:47:45,429 --> 00:47:46,828
Prego.
744
00:47:57,708 --> 00:48:00,973
A train track through the Alps
before there was a train.
745
00:48:01,044 --> 00:48:03,444
Signor Martini wants me
to have faith.
746
00:48:03,513 --> 00:48:07,347
Something I've never been good
at, and now I'm even worse at.
747
00:48:07,417 --> 00:48:11,114
Not that I don't want faith.
I'm jealous of the believers.
748
00:48:11,188 --> 00:48:12,917
But as a fallen-away Methodist,
749
00:48:12,990 --> 00:48:16,255
I do not expect to emerge
from all of this a Catholic,
750
00:48:16,326 --> 00:48:19,955
although I admit some
interior juggling is going on.
751
00:48:20,030 --> 00:48:22,965
To my surprise, I have become
friendly with Mary.
752
00:48:23,033 --> 00:48:26,264
It started the night she stood
by me through the storm,
753
00:48:26,336 --> 00:48:29,305
knowing full well
I'm not a Catholic.
754
00:48:29,373 --> 00:48:32,740
Yet, somehow, she seems more
like Mary, my favorite aunt,
755
00:48:32,809 --> 00:48:35,141
than Santa Maria.
756
00:48:35,212 --> 00:48:39,273
Aunt Mary is everywhere here,
her calm presence assuring us
757
00:48:39,383 --> 00:48:43,285
that all things will go on
as they have before.
758
00:48:43,353 --> 00:48:46,049
[ Singing "Adeste Fidelis" ]
759
00:49:02,172 --> 00:49:03,264
Buon Natale.
760
00:49:03,340 --> 00:49:04,432
Buon Natale.
761
00:49:04,508 --> 00:49:05,805
This is my wife, Flora.
762
00:49:05,876 --> 00:49:07,343
Oh!
763
00:49:07,444 --> 00:49:08,775
And my daughter, Stella.
764
00:49:08,845 --> 00:49:12,542
Stella, buon Natale.
765
00:49:12,649 --> 00:49:14,446
Bellissima.
766
00:49:14,518 --> 00:49:16,850
What a beautiful family.
767
00:49:16,920 --> 00:49:18,114
Wow.
768
00:49:18,188 --> 00:49:21,214
I thought I might see you,
so I have a gift for you.
769
00:49:24,127 --> 00:49:25,719
It is San Lorenzo.
770
00:49:25,796 --> 00:49:27,957
He is the patron saint of cooks.
771
00:49:28,031 --> 00:49:31,228
Apparently, he was martyred on a
grill and seared until he said,
772
00:49:31,301 --> 00:49:33,235
"Turn me over.
I'm done on this side."
773
00:49:33,303 --> 00:49:34,463
No!
774
00:49:34,538 --> 00:49:37,166
Yes. And now he is
the favorite saint of chefs.
775
00:49:37,240 --> 00:49:38,730
Oh!
776
00:49:38,809 --> 00:49:40,640
I think if you prayed to him,
777
00:49:40,711 --> 00:49:43,305
he will help you find
someone to cook for.
778
00:49:44,281 --> 00:49:46,511
Thank you, Signor Martini.
779
00:49:53,657 --> 00:49:56,023
[ Laughs ]
780
00:49:56,093 --> 00:49:57,560
Merry Christmas, Signora.
781
00:49:57,627 --> 00:49:59,720
Buon Natale.
782
00:50:02,666 --> 00:50:05,260
[ Speaking Italian ]
783
00:50:17,481 --> 00:50:20,917
My prayers to San Lorenzo
were quickly answered.
784
00:50:20,984 --> 00:50:24,750
I realized I already
had someone to cook for.
785
00:50:25,789 --> 00:50:27,552
Plenty of someones.
786
00:51:30,487 --> 00:51:31,954
- Bravo!
- Ahh!
787
00:51:34,758 --> 00:51:35,816
- Bravo!
- Bravo!
788
00:51:35,892 --> 00:51:37,086
Bravo!
789
00:51:37,160 --> 00:51:38,320
Aah!
790
00:51:38,395 --> 00:51:39,555
Aah!
791
00:51:39,629 --> 00:51:41,859
[ Speaking Italian ]
792
00:51:45,335 --> 00:51:48,566
- Good.
- See, Frances? Italian is easy.
793
00:51:48,638 --> 00:51:50,868
[ Speaking Italian ]
794
00:51:50,941 --> 00:51:53,136
[ Speaking Italian ]
795
00:51:55,245 --> 00:51:56,212
No!
796
00:51:56,313 --> 00:51:59,373
Aah! Aah! Aah!
797
00:52:15,265 --> 00:52:17,233
Have you talked to her yet?
798
00:52:19,936 --> 00:52:21,301
Si.
799
00:52:22,105 --> 00:52:23,766
I have talked to her.
800
00:52:23,840 --> 00:52:26,536
Why don't you go
sit next to her? Go on.
801
00:52:26,610 --> 00:52:28,100
Okay.
802
00:52:52,002 --> 00:52:53,970
Katherine!
803
00:52:56,773 --> 00:52:58,707
Francesca!
Come up!
804
00:52:58,775 --> 00:53:00,606
I'm having my portrait painted.
805
00:53:02,712 --> 00:53:03,974
Katherine?
806
00:53:04,080 --> 00:53:06,378
Come through.
I'm in here.
807
00:53:16,193 --> 00:53:17,854
Oh.
808
00:53:21,565 --> 00:53:25,524
- I'll come back another time.
- Why? You don't bother me.
809
00:53:25,602 --> 00:53:29,368
Frances, this is Zeus.
810
00:53:29,439 --> 00:53:31,532
He's an art student
from Macedonia.
811
00:53:31,608 --> 00:53:35,044
He's staying with me while
he's studying the Tuscan light.
812
00:53:35,111 --> 00:53:37,102
More vino, darling.
813
00:53:42,319 --> 00:53:43,843
Hmm.
814
00:53:44,888 --> 00:53:47,356
He's not bad.
815
00:53:47,424 --> 00:53:49,324
He's not good, either.
816
00:53:51,661 --> 00:53:55,358
Look, I'm going to go,
but I'll come back another time.
817
00:53:55,432 --> 00:53:57,900
Oh, you're so boring!
818
00:53:57,968 --> 00:53:58,764
What?
819
00:53:58,835 --> 00:54:00,268
I said you're boring.
820
00:54:00,337 --> 00:54:02,464
Look at you!
821
00:54:02,539 --> 00:54:03,767
You're sad.
822
00:54:03,840 --> 00:54:05,467
Again!
823
00:54:05,542 --> 00:54:09,308
You're like a big black hole.
824
00:54:09,379 --> 00:54:10,812
Excuse me, but I...
825
00:54:10,880 --> 00:54:15,180
Fefe always said,
"Regrets are a waste of time.
826
00:54:15,252 --> 00:54:19,348
They're the past crippling you
in the present."
827
00:54:19,422 --> 00:54:20,980
I just walked in the door.
828
00:54:21,091 --> 00:54:25,687
How are you ever going to be
happy if you keep wallowing?
829
00:54:25,762 --> 00:54:29,323
Listen,
when I was a little girl,
830
00:54:29,399 --> 00:54:31,867
I used to spend hours
looking for ladybugs.
831
00:54:31,935 --> 00:54:36,031
Finally, I'd just give up
and fall asleep in the grass.
832
00:54:36,106 --> 00:54:40,042
When I woke up,
they were crawling all over me.
833
00:54:41,011 --> 00:54:42,444
So?
834
00:54:42,512 --> 00:54:47,415
So go work on your house
and forget about it.
835
00:54:47,484 --> 00:54:49,315
I said go!
836
00:54:49,419 --> 00:54:51,614
I'm going!
837
00:54:55,825 --> 00:54:58,658
Work on the house
and forget about it.
838
00:55:00,430 --> 00:55:02,898
Gee, why hadn't
I thought of that?
839
00:55:04,034 --> 00:55:06,969
There comes a time
in every remodeler's life
840
00:55:07,037 --> 00:55:09,870
when one doesn't want
any more helpful advice.
841
00:55:09,939 --> 00:55:13,170
There comes a time when you
no longer want shaky guys
842
00:55:13,276 --> 00:55:15,301
staring at you thinking
God knows what,
843
00:55:15,378 --> 00:55:16,572
whispering things in Polish
844
00:55:16,680 --> 00:55:19,274
you're really glad
you don't understand.
845
00:55:19,382 --> 00:55:20,781
[ Speaking Polish ]
846
00:55:22,852 --> 00:55:25,878
There's only so much you can
take before there comes a time
847
00:55:25,989 --> 00:55:27,957
when you just have to get out.
848
00:55:58,388 --> 00:56:00,447
[ Speaking Italian ]
849
00:56:04,494 --> 00:56:06,587
Signorina.
850
00:56:06,663 --> 00:56:07,960
Bella!
851
00:56:08,031 --> 00:56:09,259
Great.
852
00:56:11,868 --> 00:56:13,597
Hilarious.
853
00:56:14,204 --> 00:56:16,001
Goodbye!
854
00:56:19,309 --> 00:56:20,571
[ Whistling ]
855
00:56:28,251 --> 00:56:30,776
You are American?
856
00:56:30,854 --> 00:56:32,947
English? Irish?
857
00:56:35,725 --> 00:56:37,818
There you are.
I've been looking for you.
858
00:56:37,894 --> 00:56:39,156
You said you were gonna meet me.
859
00:56:39,229 --> 00:56:42,027
I've been looking for you
for 20 minutes.
860
00:56:42,098 --> 00:56:44,032
- Who are you?
- I'm sorry.
861
00:56:44,100 --> 00:56:46,364
Mi scusi.
Thank you.
862
00:56:46,436 --> 00:56:48,961
Wait. You just kissed me
and you're going?
863
00:56:49,038 --> 00:56:50,369
Yes.
864
00:56:50,440 --> 00:56:52,237
I'm sorry.
865
00:56:54,043 --> 00:56:55,203
Okay.
866
00:57:06,956 --> 00:57:10,016
[ Whistling ]
867
00:57:20,203 --> 00:57:21,568
You are too late.
868
00:57:21,638 --> 00:57:22,696
I'm sorry?
869
00:57:22,772 --> 00:57:25,263
I've already found
somebody else.
870
00:57:27,877 --> 00:57:29,469
My loss.
871
00:57:31,481 --> 00:57:32,641
I was wondering
if you'd help me.
872
00:57:32,749 --> 00:57:34,307
I'm trying to find
an antique store
873
00:57:34,417 --> 00:57:37,318
that sells replacement parts
for a chandelier.
874
00:57:37,387 --> 00:57:39,082
Chandelier.
875
00:57:39,155 --> 00:57:40,520
- Vetre-ria.
- Vetreria.
876
00:57:40,590 --> 00:57:43,024
- Vetreria, yes.
- Okay.
877
00:57:43,092 --> 00:57:45,492
Via di La Casanova.
878
00:57:45,562 --> 00:57:46,927
Ah, Via di La Casanova.
879
00:57:46,996 --> 00:57:48,861
- Si.
- You know it?
880
00:57:48,932 --> 00:57:49,864
No.
881
00:57:49,933 --> 00:57:51,025
Oh.
882
00:57:51,100 --> 00:57:53,398
But I know where there is
another store.
883
00:57:53,470 --> 00:57:56,303
- My cousin owns one.
- Your cousin owns a vetreria?
884
00:57:56,372 --> 00:57:58,636
Yes. Antiques.
885
00:57:58,708 --> 00:57:59,732
Is it far?
886
00:57:59,809 --> 00:58:01,299
About three hours.
887
00:58:01,377 --> 00:58:04,073
Two if I drive fast.
888
00:58:04,147 --> 00:58:04,875
Two hours?
889
00:58:04,948 --> 00:58:11,945
Okay. One if I drive really,
really, really fast.
890
00:58:12,055 --> 00:58:16,515
That's very nice, but thank you.
No.
891
00:58:16,593 --> 00:58:21,428
I know you think maybe I'm
just trying to pull you up.
892
00:58:21,498 --> 00:58:23,796
Pull me up?
893
00:58:23,867 --> 00:58:25,198
Pick me up.
894
00:58:25,268 --> 00:58:27,327
Pick me up.
895
00:58:27,403 --> 00:58:28,870
Yes.
There is that chance.
896
00:58:28,938 --> 00:58:32,965
But you are the one who grabbed
me and pretend I'm your husband.
897
00:58:33,042 --> 00:58:35,374
You're probably one of those
crazy American women
898
00:58:35,478 --> 00:58:39,278
like "Charlie's Angels",
and you are going to kung-fu me
899
00:58:39,382 --> 00:58:40,610
and steal my car.
900
00:58:40,717 --> 00:58:42,947
But I'm willing to take
the chance.
901
00:58:43,019 --> 00:58:44,486
You're willing?
902
00:58:46,589 --> 00:58:48,489
What is your name?
903
00:58:48,558 --> 00:58:50,150
Marcello.
904
00:58:51,294 --> 00:58:52,522
Of course it is.
905
00:58:54,831 --> 00:58:56,765
[ Horn honks,
man shouting in Italian ]
906
00:58:56,833 --> 00:58:58,801
[ Speaking Italian ]
907
00:58:58,868 --> 00:59:00,699
Do traffic lights mean anything?
908
00:59:00,770 --> 00:59:02,237
Sure.
909
00:59:02,305 --> 00:59:04,000
Green light.
Avanti, avanti.
910
00:59:04,073 --> 00:59:06,473
- Avanti.
- Yellow light. Decoration.
911
00:59:06,543 --> 00:59:08,135
And what about red lights?
912
00:59:08,244 --> 00:59:09,871
Just a suggestion.
913
00:59:38,474 --> 00:59:42,740
Marcello. You're crazy.
914
00:59:42,812 --> 00:59:45,474
Thanks a lot.
915
00:59:45,582 --> 00:59:46,640
He doesn't have it.
916
00:59:46,749 --> 00:59:49,411
Why am I not surprised?
917
00:59:49,519 --> 00:59:52,818
- Uncle, I want an ice cream.
- You want an ice cream?
918
00:59:52,889 --> 00:59:55,289
- How many have you had today?
- Two.
919
00:59:55,358 --> 01:00:00,591
Only two? Then get another one.
Give me a kiss first.
920
01:00:03,499 --> 01:00:07,435
Maria, get her an ice cream.
Nice and big.
921
01:00:07,503 --> 01:00:09,198
This is your bar?
922
01:00:09,272 --> 01:00:12,139
We are a family.
I work here.
923
01:00:12,208 --> 01:00:15,006
And I sleep there.
924
01:00:15,111 --> 01:00:17,238
Above my cousin's antique store.
925
01:00:17,313 --> 01:00:18,610
[ Speaking Italian ]
926
01:00:21,217 --> 01:00:22,445
Did you ever taste this?
927
01:00:22,552 --> 01:00:24,383
- What is that?
- It's limoncello.
928
01:00:24,454 --> 01:00:25,318
We made this.
929
01:00:25,388 --> 01:00:27,583
- You made it?
- Yeah.
930
01:00:27,657 --> 01:00:31,787
We take the lemon, and we take
off the skin of the lemon,
931
01:00:31,861 --> 01:00:34,193
and then we put in the bottle
932
01:00:34,263 --> 01:00:38,757
with 3/4 of alcohol
and 1/4 of sugar.
933
01:00:38,835 --> 01:00:40,427
Mm-hmm.
934
01:00:40,503 --> 01:00:47,773
And you put the skin
of the lemon in the bottle,
935
01:00:47,844 --> 01:00:53,476
and you leave it
until it's dried color.
936
01:00:54,751 --> 01:01:00,587
And I forget the rest.
937
01:01:00,657 --> 01:01:02,591
But just try it.
938
01:01:09,666 --> 01:01:12,100
- Do you like it?
- I like it.
939
01:01:14,370 --> 01:01:17,464
You got your ice cream.
Bravo.
940
01:01:18,741 --> 01:01:20,868
My nephew.
941
01:01:20,943 --> 01:01:22,069
Yes.
942
01:01:51,774 --> 01:01:54,140
[ Squeaking ]
943
01:01:57,413 --> 01:01:58,937
Hello.
944
01:01:59,015 --> 01:02:01,347
Well, hello.
945
01:02:01,417 --> 01:02:03,851
Hello.
946
01:02:03,920 --> 01:02:06,855
Oh!
947
01:02:06,923 --> 01:02:08,652
Ciao.
948
01:02:08,725 --> 01:02:10,022
Ciao.
949
01:02:10,093 --> 01:02:13,688
[ Purring ]
950
01:02:13,763 --> 01:02:15,856
Veramente? No.
951
01:02:15,932 --> 01:02:17,866
What?
952
01:02:17,934 --> 01:02:21,062
He says,
"Take me home with you."
953
01:02:21,137 --> 01:02:22,126
He does, does he?
954
01:02:22,205 --> 01:02:24,036
Esattamente.
955
01:02:24,107 --> 01:02:26,871
Ciao, piccolo, Ciao.
Ciao.
956
01:02:26,943 --> 01:02:28,501
[ Meowing ]
957
01:02:37,653 --> 01:02:42,750
I run into you in the street
in Rome, and now we're here.
958
01:02:42,825 --> 01:02:44,486
Didn't you have plans today?
959
01:02:44,560 --> 01:02:47,290
Didn't you have something
you had to do?
960
01:02:49,332 --> 01:02:52,096
So what?
961
01:02:52,168 --> 01:02:54,432
If you smash
into something good,
962
01:02:54,504 --> 01:03:00,602
you should hold on
until it's time to let go.
963
01:03:01,577 --> 01:03:03,511
And now is not the time.
964
01:03:05,782 --> 01:03:07,511
Not in my opinion.
965
01:03:08,584 --> 01:03:09,846
No.
966
01:03:14,924 --> 01:03:17,620
You have beautiful eyes,
Francesca.
967
01:03:18,761 --> 01:03:21,958
I wish I could swim inside them.
968
01:03:27,603 --> 01:03:28,069
What?
969
01:03:28,137 --> 01:03:31,504
No. It's just that's
exactly what American women
970
01:03:31,574 --> 01:03:34,441
think Italian men say.
971
01:03:34,510 --> 01:03:37,172
I guess.
972
01:03:39,816 --> 01:03:41,215
Thank you.
973
01:03:47,323 --> 01:03:49,416
Marcello, I'm sorry.
974
01:03:49,492 --> 01:03:51,426
I'm so sorry.
975
01:03:52,428 --> 01:03:57,024
I'm sorry.
I'm really nervous, you know.
976
01:03:57,099 --> 01:03:59,260
I was married for a long time.
977
01:03:59,335 --> 01:04:03,101
And since then,
there hasn't been anybody.
978
01:04:07,210 --> 01:04:09,872
Would you like to help me
change that?
979
01:04:13,749 --> 01:04:16,411
You are asking me
to sleep with you?
980
01:04:17,453 --> 01:04:18,818
Yes.
981
01:04:20,056 --> 01:04:21,580
Hmm.
982
01:04:21,691 --> 01:04:24,285
That is exactly
the kind of thing
983
01:04:24,360 --> 01:04:26,419
we Italian men think
American women say.
984
01:04:26,495 --> 01:04:28,690
Oh!
985
01:04:28,764 --> 01:04:30,129
Yeah.
986
01:04:33,269 --> 01:04:35,931
You honor me with your offer.
987
01:05:21,918 --> 01:05:23,180
Francesca.
988
01:05:23,252 --> 01:05:24,719
Yes?
989
01:05:27,924 --> 01:05:30,825
I'm going to make love
all over you.
990
01:05:30,893 --> 01:05:32,258
Okay.
991
01:05:41,904 --> 01:05:43,565
Okay.
992
01:05:47,109 --> 01:05:48,906
Ohh!
993
01:05:48,978 --> 01:05:50,411
Yeah.
994
01:05:53,516 --> 01:05:56,883
[ Marcello singing in Italian ]
995
01:06:25,982 --> 01:06:27,540
Mamma mia!
996
01:06:28,751 --> 01:06:30,082
Che bella spalla.
997
01:06:30,152 --> 01:06:32,677
- What is spalla?
- Shoulder.
998
01:06:36,359 --> 01:06:38,418
And what do you call this?
999
01:06:38,494 --> 01:06:40,189
La gola.
1000
01:06:40,262 --> 01:06:41,320
La gola.
1001
01:06:41,397 --> 01:06:43,194
Mm-hmm.
1002
01:06:43,265 --> 01:06:44,755
And this?
1003
01:06:45,768 --> 01:06:47,201
Il capezzolo.
1004
01:06:47,269 --> 01:06:48,531
Il capezzolo.
1005
01:06:48,604 --> 01:06:49,593
Uh-huh.
1006
01:06:51,073 --> 01:06:52,802
And this?
1007
01:06:55,211 --> 01:06:56,473
Esausto.
1008
01:06:56,545 --> 01:06:57,534
Exhausted?
1009
01:06:57,613 --> 01:06:59,410
Exhausted.
1010
01:06:59,482 --> 01:07:03,851
At least for the next 5 minutes.
1011
01:07:03,919 --> 01:07:05,546
Okay.
1012
01:07:06,522 --> 01:07:07,853
Okay.
1013
01:07:10,026 --> 01:07:11,618
Me too.
1014
01:07:14,964 --> 01:07:18,297
It's terrible that you bought
that villa in Cortona.
1015
01:07:18,367 --> 01:07:19,391
Why?
1016
01:07:21,704 --> 01:07:25,834
Because it's not in Positano,
and I am.
1017
01:07:28,577 --> 01:07:32,308
You have to promise
to come back here.
1018
01:07:32,381 --> 01:07:34,576
Promise me.
1019
01:07:34,683 --> 01:07:36,310
When?
1020
01:07:37,420 --> 01:07:39,411
Can you come this weekend?
1021
01:07:41,457 --> 01:07:43,652
I think so.
1022
01:07:45,094 --> 01:07:46,391
You think so?
1023
01:07:46,462 --> 01:07:48,692
Hmm.
1024
01:07:48,764 --> 01:07:50,629
You think so?
1025
01:07:57,406 --> 01:08:00,671
Yes! Yes! Yes!
1026
01:08:00,743 --> 01:08:01,573
Yes!
1027
01:08:01,644 --> 01:08:02,576
Yes!
1028
01:08:02,645 --> 01:08:04,806
Yes!
1029
01:08:04,914 --> 01:08:06,973
Thank you.
Thank you.
1030
01:08:07,049 --> 01:08:10,075
# I knew it, I knew it,
I knew it #
1031
01:08:10,186 --> 01:08:11,744
Whoo!
I still got it.
1032
01:08:11,854 --> 01:08:13,287
I still got it.
1033
01:08:13,355 --> 01:08:14,515
I still got it!
1034
01:08:14,590 --> 01:08:16,558
Thank God!
1035
01:08:18,427 --> 01:08:19,325
Oh, yeah.
1036
01:08:28,370 --> 01:08:29,803
Buongiorno.
1037
01:08:32,374 --> 01:08:34,274
Buongiorno!
1038
01:08:34,376 --> 01:08:35,866
Do I still look sad to you?
1039
01:08:35,945 --> 01:08:37,810
No.
1040
01:08:37,880 --> 01:08:39,609
Ladybugs, Katherine.
1041
01:08:39,682 --> 01:08:41,707
Lots and lots of ladybugs.
1042
01:08:41,817 --> 01:08:45,048
Lovely.
When do you see him again?
1043
01:08:45,121 --> 01:08:46,554
Tomorrow.
1044
01:09:14,016 --> 01:09:15,313
What?
1045
01:09:15,384 --> 01:09:16,817
What?
1046
01:09:16,886 --> 01:09:18,444
Oh!
1047
01:09:18,554 --> 01:09:19,543
Ha!
1048
01:09:22,691 --> 01:09:24,090
I would have told you
I was coming,
1049
01:09:24,160 --> 01:09:26,424
but you would have
talked me out of flying.
1050
01:09:29,231 --> 01:09:31,529
Oh, look at you!
1051
01:09:31,600 --> 01:09:33,795
God damn it, Frances.
1052
01:09:36,305 --> 01:09:38,899
- I...
- What?
1053
01:09:38,974 --> 01:09:40,566
I gotta go pee!
1054
01:09:42,778 --> 01:09:45,178
You must be so exhausted.
1055
01:09:45,247 --> 01:09:46,305
Oh!
1056
01:09:46,382 --> 01:09:49,476
Pbht! See this?
1057
01:09:49,585 --> 01:09:52,019
Tell me there's a baby in there.
1058
01:09:52,087 --> 01:09:53,349
Mm-hmm.
1059
01:09:55,257 --> 01:09:58,454
Big old baby in there.
1060
01:09:58,527 --> 01:10:00,358
Right now.
1061
01:10:01,664 --> 01:10:03,097
I'm with you.
1062
01:10:06,769 --> 01:10:08,327
Oh, jeez.
1063
01:10:14,109 --> 01:10:17,374
So, what's it like
having one of these in Cortona?
1064
01:10:18,414 --> 01:10:20,405
I hear the town midwife's good.
1065
01:10:20,516 --> 01:10:24,282
She puts a knife under the bed
to cut the pain.
1066
01:10:25,621 --> 01:10:27,714
Florence is an hour away.
1067
01:10:27,823 --> 01:10:29,085
You're gonna deliver this baby
1068
01:10:29,158 --> 01:10:31,922
in a hospital gown
designed by Armani.
1069
01:10:54,383 --> 01:10:56,851
She ran out on me.
1070
01:10:58,220 --> 01:11:03,749
She said she realized she didn't
want to be a mother after all.
1071
01:11:12,434 --> 01:11:15,926
[ Crying ]
Oh, disaster, Frances.
1072
01:11:19,775 --> 01:11:21,970
How do you do it?
1073
01:11:25,481 --> 01:11:28,917
How do you ever breathe again?
1074
01:11:36,659 --> 01:11:38,320
Pretty soon.
1075
01:11:43,332 --> 01:11:45,630
God, I missed you.
1076
01:11:45,701 --> 01:11:50,934
FRANCES: Marcello, I really
think I'd better stay here.
1077
01:11:51,006 --> 01:11:54,464
Oh, I'm sorry.
How about next weekend?
1078
01:11:54,543 --> 01:11:57,034
Okay, well how about
the one after that?
1079
01:11:58,247 --> 01:12:01,307
No, of course, I understand.
1080
01:12:01,417 --> 01:12:03,749
I won't forget you.
1081
01:12:04,753 --> 01:12:06,948
I think a lot about you, too.
1082
01:12:07,056 --> 01:12:08,182
Okay.
1083
01:12:08,257 --> 01:12:10,987
Well, until then.
1084
01:12:11,060 --> 01:12:12,425
Bye.
1085
01:12:14,196 --> 01:12:17,563
There's something strange
about these trees.
1086
01:12:17,633 --> 01:12:18,759
It's like they know.
1087
01:12:18,834 --> 01:12:21,667
And they know
that we know that they know.
1088
01:12:21,737 --> 01:12:25,138
They're creepy.
Creepy Italian trees.
1089
01:12:25,207 --> 01:12:26,105
The baby's gonna like them
1090
01:12:26,175 --> 01:12:27,870
'cause it's gonna be
a creepy Italian baby
1091
01:12:27,943 --> 01:12:29,638
who goes around saying,
"Ciao, Mamma,"
1092
01:12:29,712 --> 01:12:34,172
and doing that backward
hand-wave thing.
1093
01:12:35,984 --> 01:12:38,384
Life is strange.
1094
01:12:43,826 --> 01:12:46,260
Where were you going
when I arrived?
1095
01:12:46,328 --> 01:12:47,920
Nowhere important.
1096
01:12:47,996 --> 01:12:49,793
What's he like?
1097
01:12:49,865 --> 01:12:51,594
He's a creepy Italian.
1098
01:12:51,667 --> 01:12:54,101
- So go see him.
- I will.
1099
01:12:54,169 --> 01:12:57,434
I want to spend time
with my creepy American friend.
1100
01:12:57,506 --> 01:12:59,701
I refuse to screw up
your love life.
1101
01:12:59,775 --> 01:13:01,834
Don't be ridiculous, Patti.
1102
01:13:01,910 --> 01:13:04,140
You are my love life.
1103
01:13:46,054 --> 01:13:48,022
[ Water dripping ]
1104
01:14:05,374 --> 01:14:09,310
PATTI: Frances,
could you come up here, please?
1105
01:14:09,378 --> 01:14:11,778
There's hot water
in the toilet bowl.
1106
01:14:14,750 --> 01:14:16,308
Oh, my God.
1107
01:14:16,418 --> 01:14:18,909
- That's close to boiling.
- Mm-hmm.
1108
01:14:19,021 --> 01:14:21,683
They must have crossed
a pipe somewhere.
1109
01:14:21,757 --> 01:14:23,748
Oh, this is really bad,
isn't it?
1110
01:14:23,826 --> 01:14:27,922
Well, it's not good, unless you
want to give your ass a facial.
1111
01:14:27,996 --> 01:14:30,590
That's a contradiction in terms.
1112
01:14:30,666 --> 01:14:34,966
I guess it'd be more
of an ass-cial.
1113
01:14:35,037 --> 01:14:37,369
[ Woman giggling in distance ]
1114
01:14:47,182 --> 01:14:48,774
- [ Chuckles ]
- [ Gasps ]
1115
01:14:49,985 --> 01:14:52,351
Oh, God. Go.
Go, go, go.
1116
01:14:52,421 --> 01:14:54,116
PAWEL:
I'm sorry, Frances!
1117
01:14:54,189 --> 01:14:56,555
He's sorry.
1118
01:14:56,625 --> 01:14:58,786
We have nowhere else
to be together.
1119
01:14:58,861 --> 01:15:00,294
What does that make me?
1120
01:15:00,362 --> 01:15:04,230
Saint Francesca,
patron saint of horny teenagers?
1121
01:15:04,299 --> 01:15:06,267
Pawel, you were doing it
in my bed.
1122
01:15:06,335 --> 01:15:07,927
I don't even do it in my bed.
1123
01:15:08,003 --> 01:15:09,937
Please, Francesca, help us.
1124
01:15:10,005 --> 01:15:12,872
My father don't let us see
each other.
1125
01:15:12,941 --> 01:15:15,637
Maybe he thinks you're young
and shouldn't be...
1126
01:15:15,711 --> 01:15:17,838
It's because I'm Polish.
1127
01:15:17,946 --> 01:15:20,346
It will be terrible
if we are not together.
1128
01:15:20,382 --> 01:15:22,247
[ Speaking Italian ]
1129
01:15:30,592 --> 01:15:33,186
"Assassinate."
Did you say "assassinate"?
1130
01:15:33,262 --> 01:15:35,662
Did she say you were going
to assassinate somebody?
1131
01:15:35,731 --> 01:15:38,427
No, she misunderstand.
1132
01:15:38,500 --> 01:15:40,263
I didn't say...
1133
01:15:40,335 --> 01:15:43,702
Amore, I didn't say,
"assassino."
1134
01:15:43,772 --> 01:15:47,003
I said, "I'm going to ask Nino"
1135
01:15:47,075 --> 01:15:50,875
for money to help us
get married.
1136
01:15:50,979 --> 01:15:53,880
- Oh!
- "Ask Nino." Oh!
1137
01:15:53,916 --> 01:15:56,714
I didn't understand.
1138
01:15:56,818 --> 01:15:57,580
Married?
1139
01:15:57,653 --> 01:16:00,315
You barely understand
what the other is saying.
1140
01:16:00,389 --> 01:16:02,448
We are in love.
1141
01:16:02,524 --> 01:16:04,424
And I go with him this weekend.
1142
01:16:04,493 --> 01:16:08,486
To the flag-throwing festival.
I am going to throw the flag.
1143
01:16:08,564 --> 01:16:10,794
Throw the flag.
Why?
1144
01:16:10,866 --> 01:16:14,495
Because I can do it
as good as any Italian man.
1145
01:16:14,570 --> 01:16:16,003
That's why.
1146
01:16:16,071 --> 01:16:17,629
And her father will see.
1147
01:16:17,706 --> 01:16:19,298
PLACIDO:
Francesca?
1148
01:16:19,374 --> 01:16:21,672
- Francesca?
- My father.
1149
01:16:22,711 --> 01:16:25,339
- Francesca.
- Placido, hi.
1150
01:16:25,447 --> 01:16:27,381
My daughter says
you are taking her
1151
01:16:27,449 --> 01:16:30,316
to the festa in Montepulciano.
1152
01:16:30,385 --> 01:16:31,409
This is true?
1153
01:16:31,520 --> 01:16:33,886
Just a moment, please.
1154
01:16:37,059 --> 01:16:39,857
I told him you're taking me
so he will stay home.
1155
01:16:39,928 --> 01:16:42,021
I don't want to lie
to your father.
1156
01:16:42,097 --> 01:16:44,964
Come on, Frances.
Who cares?
1157
01:16:45,033 --> 01:16:46,625
PAWEL:
Frances?
1158
01:16:47,603 --> 01:16:52,131
If I am not with her,
I will die of a broken heart.
1159
01:16:55,310 --> 01:16:56,800
You won't die.
1160
01:17:13,128 --> 01:17:14,425
[ Cheering ]
1161
01:17:14,496 --> 01:17:16,020
Isn't he great?
1162
01:17:22,804 --> 01:17:24,772
Oh, there he is!
1163
01:17:30,379 --> 01:17:32,370
These are straight men.
1164
01:17:32,481 --> 01:17:35,382
In tights twirling flags.
1165
01:17:35,951 --> 01:17:38,078
- Fantastic!
- Yeah.
1166
01:17:42,524 --> 01:17:45,118
Oh, this is it!
1167
01:17:48,897 --> 01:17:50,728
He is fantastic!
1168
01:17:53,368 --> 01:17:55,495
Fantastico!
1169
01:18:16,058 --> 01:18:17,389
Whoo!
1170
01:18:39,247 --> 01:18:41,306
- Yay! Bravo!
- Bravo!
1171
01:18:45,120 --> 01:18:48,681
CHIARA:
Pawel, I love you!
1172
01:18:48,757 --> 01:18:49,883
[ Crowd gasps ]
1173
01:18:49,958 --> 01:18:50,617
Oh!
1174
01:18:50,692 --> 01:18:51,989
[ Gasps ]
1175
01:18:57,199 --> 01:19:00,225
Pawel!
Mi scusi. Pawel!
1176
01:19:00,302 --> 01:19:02,202
- Oh, oh.
- Easy.
1177
01:19:02,270 --> 01:19:03,965
Easy. Easy.
1178
01:19:04,806 --> 01:19:06,296
Mi scusi.
1179
01:19:11,646 --> 01:19:12,772
I throw the flag.
1180
01:19:12,848 --> 01:19:14,475
Si, amore.
1181
01:19:18,520 --> 01:19:20,351
They're fine.
1182
01:19:21,623 --> 01:19:23,113
Let's go.
1183
01:19:23,191 --> 01:19:28,128
What is it about love
that makes us so stupid?
1184
01:19:30,031 --> 01:19:31,828
Take the man with the flowers.
1185
01:19:31,900 --> 01:19:33,595
Same deal every day.
1186
01:19:33,668 --> 01:19:35,192
I mean, enough already.
1187
01:19:35,270 --> 01:19:38,637
Why can he just let it go
and get over it?
1188
01:19:49,584 --> 01:19:51,609
Francesca, you see my daughter?
1189
01:19:51,720 --> 01:19:53,654
She seems so different.
1190
01:19:53,722 --> 01:19:56,452
- Really?
- Oh, Chiara is not herself.
1191
01:19:56,525 --> 01:19:57,492
Oh.
1192
01:19:57,592 --> 01:20:02,188
Maybe do you know
what's bothering her?
1193
01:20:02,264 --> 01:20:04,198
Placido, I don't know.
1194
01:20:04,266 --> 01:20:05,028
Oh.
1195
01:20:05,100 --> 01:20:09,537
Hey, Frances, look.
You can see Bramasole from here.
1196
01:20:09,604 --> 01:20:10,730
See?
1197
01:20:11,606 --> 01:20:13,130
Thank you.
1198
01:20:22,350 --> 01:20:23,612
It's Marcello!
1199
01:20:23,685 --> 01:20:25,585
Oh, my God!
1200
01:20:29,157 --> 01:20:30,818
- Wait a minute.
- What?
1201
01:20:30,892 --> 01:20:33,190
What's he doing?
Don't go!
1202
01:20:33,261 --> 01:20:35,161
Where are you going?
1203
01:20:35,230 --> 01:20:36,254
Patti!
1204
01:20:36,331 --> 01:20:37,628
Marcello!
1205
01:20:37,699 --> 01:20:39,326
Marcello!
1206
01:20:44,406 --> 01:20:46,203
Marcello! Ah!
1207
01:20:51,813 --> 01:20:52,973
Marcello!
1208
01:20:59,120 --> 01:21:01,247
Aaah!
1209
01:21:03,925 --> 01:21:05,153
Wait!
1210
01:21:08,763 --> 01:21:10,754
Marcello!
1211
01:21:14,336 --> 01:21:18,534
We tried you on your cell,
but you were in a dead zone.
1212
01:21:18,607 --> 01:21:20,768
I cannot believe
you let him leave.
1213
01:21:20,842 --> 01:21:23,436
- He said he couldn't wait.
- Couldn't wait?
1214
01:21:23,511 --> 01:21:26,036
- Why?
- He was on his way to Arezzo.
1215
01:21:26,114 --> 01:21:27,741
He was nearby
and thought he'd take a shot.
1216
01:21:27,816 --> 01:21:30,011
He was very disappointed, okay?
1217
01:21:30,118 --> 01:21:31,915
You've got a snail in your ear.
1218
01:21:32,020 --> 01:21:32,611
Good.
1219
01:21:32,687 --> 01:21:33,210
Really?
1220
01:21:33,321 --> 01:21:35,312
No!
Get it out!
1221
01:21:35,423 --> 01:21:37,118
He left you a note.
1222
01:21:39,928 --> 01:21:41,759
Hold still.
1223
01:21:41,830 --> 01:21:45,698
He's going north
for a couple of weeks.
1224
01:21:50,639 --> 01:21:51,503
Oh, my God.
1225
01:21:51,573 --> 01:21:53,734
He had a dream
about me in a white dress.
1226
01:21:53,808 --> 01:21:55,673
A white dress?
Holy shit!
1227
01:21:55,744 --> 01:21:59,145
Damn it, Patti,
why didn't you make him wait?
1228
01:21:59,214 --> 01:22:01,182
I mean, come on,
You're a tough dyke.
1229
01:22:01,283 --> 01:22:03,774
You could have tied him
to a chair!
1230
01:22:03,885 --> 01:22:07,582
You could have
faked labor at least!
1231
01:22:07,656 --> 01:22:09,749
I wouldn't have had to fake it.
1232
01:22:11,226 --> 01:22:14,753
[ Inhales, exhales deeply ]
1233
01:22:14,829 --> 01:22:17,457
Ten fingers.
Ten toes.
1234
01:22:17,532 --> 01:22:20,365
[ Inhales, exhales deeply ]
1235
01:22:20,435 --> 01:22:23,427
I commend you
on a classic choice.
1236
01:22:25,974 --> 01:22:27,339
What's her name, Mom?
1237
01:22:27,409 --> 01:22:29,001
Alexandra.
1238
01:22:29,110 --> 01:22:32,011
Alexandra.
1239
01:22:34,816 --> 01:22:38,183
In Italian, the literal
translation of "to give birth,"
1240
01:22:38,253 --> 01:22:41,654
"dare alla luce,"
is to give to the light.
1241
01:22:41,723 --> 01:22:43,884
Alexandra.
1242
01:22:45,593 --> 01:22:47,527
Welcome to the light.
1243
01:22:50,865 --> 01:22:51,957
All right.
1244
01:22:52,033 --> 01:22:52,829
Hi!
1245
01:22:52,901 --> 01:22:55,301
Yes! Yes!
1246
01:22:56,504 --> 01:22:58,529
Hello, sweetheart.
1247
01:22:58,606 --> 01:23:00,005
Alexandra.
1248
01:23:00,041 --> 01:23:02,566
- Alexandra.
- [ Toys squeaking ]
1249
01:23:02,677 --> 01:23:04,508
Okay, I can...
1250
01:23:04,579 --> 01:23:06,570
Hey, baby.
1251
01:23:06,648 --> 01:23:09,082
Oh, you're so cute.
You're so cute.
1252
01:23:19,928 --> 01:23:21,054
Oh!
1253
01:23:40,615 --> 01:23:42,515
Frances.
1254
01:23:44,919 --> 01:23:47,183
We are finished.
1255
01:24:11,579 --> 01:24:13,103
Poland.
1256
01:24:30,899 --> 01:24:32,491
Dziekuje.
1257
01:24:34,903 --> 01:24:36,234
Dziekuje.
1258
01:25:06,201 --> 01:25:08,692
Come back soon.
I'll cook for you.
1259
01:25:09,704 --> 01:25:10,830
Pawel, you too?
1260
01:25:10,905 --> 01:25:13,271
Chiara is waiting!
1261
01:25:17,879 --> 01:25:21,440
Patti, you want to
come with me to town?
1262
01:25:21,549 --> 01:25:23,176
We could bring the baby.
1263
01:25:54,315 --> 01:25:56,044
[ Knock on door ]
1264
01:26:57,445 --> 01:26:59,811
I have to buy a white dress.
1265
01:27:14,896 --> 01:27:16,386
Excuse me.
1266
01:27:16,464 --> 01:27:20,696
- Could you give me a lift?
- With pleasure.
1267
01:27:22,070 --> 01:27:23,002
Grazie.
1268
01:27:23,071 --> 01:27:25,062
[ Speaking Italian ]
1269
01:27:40,688 --> 01:27:42,349
[ Speaking Italian ]
1270
01:27:44,192 --> 01:27:45,181
Grazie.
1271
01:27:45,260 --> 01:27:48,957
I could wait and take you back.
1272
01:27:49,030 --> 01:27:52,261
Thanks, but I've got
my boyfriend.
1273
01:28:00,475 --> 01:28:02,102
Marcello!
1274
01:28:03,344 --> 01:28:04,971
Marcello!
1275
01:28:07,448 --> 01:28:09,245
Francesca.
1276
01:28:09,317 --> 01:28:11,547
Wait there, I'm coming down.
1277
01:28:20,628 --> 01:28:21,788
Francesca.
1278
01:28:23,097 --> 01:28:26,157
Look how beautiful you are.
1279
01:28:26,234 --> 01:28:28,532
It's incredible to see you.
1280
01:28:31,205 --> 01:28:33,173
Every time we made plans,
it didn't happen.
1281
01:28:33,241 --> 01:28:35,766
So this time, I thought
I'll surprise you.
1282
01:28:35,877 --> 01:28:37,868
I am surprised.
1283
01:28:39,947 --> 01:28:41,778
What brings you to Positano?
1284
01:28:41,849 --> 01:28:44,647
What brings me to Positano?
1285
01:28:46,821 --> 01:28:49,517
What brings me to Positano?
1286
01:28:49,590 --> 01:28:50,989
WOMAN:
Marcello.
1287
01:28:51,059 --> 01:28:52,993
We're going to be late.
1288
01:28:53,061 --> 01:28:54,858
One moment, darling.
1289
01:28:54,929 --> 01:28:57,090
I'll be right there.
1290
01:29:02,337 --> 01:29:03,827
Wow.
1291
01:29:07,041 --> 01:29:08,565
I came at a bad time.
1292
01:29:08,643 --> 01:29:11,544
Francesca, wait.
Wait. Wait!
1293
01:29:11,579 --> 01:29:14,707
I'm sorry you're hurt.
But what did you expect?
1294
01:29:14,816 --> 01:29:16,875
What did I expect?
1295
01:29:16,984 --> 01:29:19,919
You came to Bramasole.
You left that note.
1296
01:29:19,987 --> 01:29:21,284
I thought that you...
1297
01:29:21,356 --> 01:29:23,221
Wait.
Just a minute.
1298
01:29:23,291 --> 01:29:26,522
Months ago,
we had a beautiful affair.
1299
01:29:26,594 --> 01:29:30,724
And if you think I wanted more
of you after that, you're right.
1300
01:29:30,798 --> 01:29:33,426
Because I did, of course.
1301
01:29:33,501 --> 01:29:36,527
You're a fantastic woman,
Francesca.
1302
01:29:36,604 --> 01:29:38,731
But we were never able
to come together again,
1303
01:29:38,806 --> 01:29:40,967
even though we tried.
1304
01:29:41,042 --> 01:29:43,806
And this sort of thing
must come naturally.
1305
01:29:47,181 --> 01:29:49,172
I told you.
1306
01:29:49,283 --> 01:29:51,478
There was my friend.
She was going to have a baby.
1307
01:29:51,552 --> 01:29:54,316
There were many,
many other things.
1308
01:29:56,057 --> 01:29:58,355
Important things you had to do.
1309
01:30:00,161 --> 01:30:02,186
And you couldn't wait.
1310
01:30:03,398 --> 01:30:04,524
Right?
1311
01:30:08,669 --> 01:30:10,864
Don't worry, Francesca.
1312
01:30:10,938 --> 01:30:12,371
Don't worry.
1313
01:30:13,608 --> 01:30:15,667
There is nothing to regret.
1314
01:30:16,978 --> 01:30:18,843
Do you regret this?
1315
01:30:20,715 --> 01:30:22,046
I don't...
1316
01:30:27,255 --> 01:30:30,281
There is someone for you,
Francesca.
1317
01:30:41,068 --> 01:30:42,558
Goodbye.
1318
01:30:51,145 --> 01:30:52,669
Francesca!
1319
01:31:15,203 --> 01:31:17,763
She's in the fountain!
1320
01:31:17,839 --> 01:31:20,603
- Who is in the fountain?
- The crazy blonde!
1321
01:31:30,184 --> 01:31:32,414
What's going on here?
1322
01:31:32,520 --> 01:31:36,820
She is Sylvia
in "La Dolce Vita."
1323
01:31:40,261 --> 01:31:42,252
She's very good, actually.
1324
01:31:48,369 --> 01:31:49,927
Is she drunk?
1325
01:31:50,004 --> 01:31:51,494
I hope so.
1326
01:31:58,546 --> 01:32:03,245
You know, in "La Dolce Vita,"
he goes in and he gets her.
1327
01:32:04,318 --> 01:32:08,687
Mastroianni. He goes in,
and he fishes her out.
1328
01:32:42,757 --> 01:32:44,190
Katherine.
1329
01:32:59,574 --> 01:33:01,132
Thank you.
1330
01:33:06,080 --> 01:33:08,605
Do you think I make
a good Sylvia?
1331
01:33:08,716 --> 01:33:09,808
You were wonderful.
1332
01:33:09,917 --> 01:33:10,975
Oh.
1333
01:33:14,555 --> 01:33:15,749
Here.
1334
01:33:19,827 --> 01:33:22,660
I see Zeus is gone.
1335
01:33:22,730 --> 01:33:24,891
Back to Mount Olympus.
1336
01:33:24,966 --> 01:33:27,025
I'm so sorry.
1337
01:33:27,101 --> 01:33:30,559
Don't be.
I'm fine now.
1338
01:33:30,638 --> 01:33:34,005
There's nothing like a fountain
and a magnum of French champagne
1339
01:33:34,075 --> 01:33:36,805
to put you right again.
1340
01:33:37,979 --> 01:33:39,344
Really?
1341
01:33:41,616 --> 01:33:43,413
What do you think?
1342
01:33:50,992 --> 01:33:52,755
Oh.
1343
01:34:04,605 --> 01:34:09,474
You know who I really love
the most from all the films?
1344
01:34:10,478 --> 01:34:12,139
Cabiria.
1345
01:34:13,948 --> 01:34:16,439
You remember at the end
1346
01:34:16,550 --> 01:34:20,509
when another man has left her
in the most terrible way,
1347
01:34:20,621 --> 01:34:23,181
and she thinks
it's all over for her?
1348
01:34:25,192 --> 01:34:28,889
Then she sees some children
playing in the street,
1349
01:34:28,963 --> 01:34:30,726
making music.
1350
01:34:31,832 --> 01:34:34,027
And before she knows it...
1351
01:34:35,202 --> 01:34:37,227
she's smiling again.
1352
01:34:39,874 --> 01:34:43,173
That's what Fefe always said.
1353
01:34:43,244 --> 01:34:46,509
No matter what happens...
1354
01:34:48,482 --> 01:34:51,679
always keep
your childish innocence.
1355
01:34:53,554 --> 01:34:58,150
It's the most important thing.
1356
01:35:16,811 --> 01:35:18,403
You're back?
What happened?
1357
01:35:18,479 --> 01:35:19,946
How'd it go with Marcello?
1358
01:35:20,047 --> 01:35:21,708
I don't want to talk about it.
1359
01:35:21,782 --> 01:35:23,181
Chiara's here.
She's upset.
1360
01:35:23,250 --> 01:35:27,084
She's out in the garden
talking with Pawel.
1361
01:35:27,154 --> 01:35:29,019
I can't talk about it now.
1362
01:35:29,090 --> 01:35:31,217
Oh. Fran.
1363
01:35:49,510 --> 01:35:51,535
Stupid.
1364
01:35:51,612 --> 01:35:53,409
Stupid.
1365
01:35:53,514 --> 01:35:56,711
Stupid! Stupid!
Stupid!
1366
01:35:58,519 --> 01:36:00,111
Stupid!
1367
01:36:00,187 --> 01:36:01,119
Aah!
1368
01:36:01,188 --> 01:36:03,418
What more can I do?
1369
01:36:08,529 --> 01:36:10,861
[ Chiara crying in distance ]
1370
01:36:19,273 --> 01:36:21,036
It's okay.
1371
01:36:22,176 --> 01:36:24,576
It's not your fault.
1372
01:36:45,166 --> 01:36:46,531
Babbo.
1373
01:37:00,247 --> 01:37:03,045
I want to ask your permission
to marry your daughter.
1374
01:37:03,117 --> 01:37:04,778
[ Speaking Italian ]
1375
01:37:04,885 --> 01:37:09,754
It's nice,
but it's out of the question.
1376
01:37:09,824 --> 01:37:12,349
I have come here
to ask your permission
1377
01:37:12,426 --> 01:37:13,723
to marry your daughter.
1378
01:37:13,794 --> 01:37:17,389
I will love her forever, and I
know that I will make her happy.
1379
01:37:17,464 --> 01:37:18,795
All young men say this.
1380
01:37:18,866 --> 01:37:20,857
Sometimes it's true.
1381
01:37:20,935 --> 01:37:21,959
Never.
1382
01:37:22,036 --> 01:37:24,300
Never?
What about you two?
1383
01:37:24,371 --> 01:37:27,670
Don't be ridiculous.
I hate him half of the time.
1384
01:37:29,176 --> 01:37:33,875
Placido, don't you want
Chiara to be happy in love?
1385
01:37:33,948 --> 01:37:35,677
Happy.
1386
01:37:35,783 --> 01:37:37,683
Happy is about a lot of things.
1387
01:37:37,751 --> 01:37:39,946
It's not just
about young passion.
1388
01:37:40,020 --> 01:37:42,853
This doesn't last, Chiara,
and when it's over,
1389
01:37:42,923 --> 01:37:45,221
what you will have left
is nothing.
1390
01:37:45,292 --> 01:37:47,192
He has nothing to offer you.
1391
01:37:47,261 --> 01:37:50,492
I have everything to offer her.
1392
01:37:51,632 --> 01:37:52,997
Everything.
1393
01:37:53,067 --> 01:37:56,503
Pawel, let's go.
1394
01:37:57,538 --> 01:37:58,436
Chiara!
1395
01:37:58,505 --> 01:37:59,995
Wait. Wait.
1396
01:38:03,077 --> 01:38:04,874
Won't you give your blessing?
1397
01:38:04,945 --> 01:38:07,539
What if this is it?
1398
01:38:07,648 --> 01:38:09,343
The real thing.
1399
01:38:10,651 --> 01:38:12,118
A love that lasts forever.
1400
01:38:12,219 --> 01:38:14,847
What you describe
is all in fairy tales.
1401
01:38:14,922 --> 01:38:16,150
No, it's not.
1402
01:38:16,223 --> 01:38:19,750
And how do you know?
From personal experience?
1403
01:38:23,964 --> 01:38:26,592
No, I looked for it,
and I didn't find it.
1404
01:38:27,468 --> 01:38:29,868
But that doesn't mean
it doesn't exist.
1405
01:38:29,937 --> 01:38:32,132
That's exactly what it means.
1406
01:38:32,206 --> 01:38:34,333
No one has had it.
1407
01:38:34,408 --> 01:38:36,933
I did!
I had a great love.
1408
01:38:37,011 --> 01:38:38,273
Mamma!
1409
01:38:38,379 --> 01:38:40,779
Your father...
a great love.
1410
01:38:40,881 --> 01:38:42,849
And I'll never forget it.
1411
01:38:42,917 --> 01:38:44,578
Mamma! Mamma!
1412
01:38:44,652 --> 01:38:47,780
He's a poor Polish laborer.
1413
01:38:47,888 --> 01:38:49,287
He is nobody.
1414
01:38:49,356 --> 01:38:51,950
He has no family!
1415
01:38:53,427 --> 01:38:55,122
That's not true.
1416
01:39:00,534 --> 01:39:02,161
He has me.
1417
01:39:04,505 --> 01:39:06,336
I'm his family.
1418
01:39:08,342 --> 01:39:10,401
I'm his family.
1419
01:39:19,753 --> 01:39:22,085
[ Speaking Italian ]
1420
01:39:33,300 --> 01:39:35,393
Chiara.
1421
01:39:35,469 --> 01:39:37,801
[ Speaking Italian ]
1422
01:39:59,660 --> 01:40:00,592
Pawel.
1423
01:40:00,661 --> 01:40:02,993
[ Speaking Italian ]
1424
01:40:13,741 --> 01:40:15,333
[ Speaking Italian ]
1425
01:40:15,409 --> 01:40:17,639
Amen.
1426
01:40:17,711 --> 01:40:19,975
- [ Speaking Italian ]
- CHIARA: Amen.
1427
01:40:20,080 --> 01:40:21,980
[ Speaking Italian ]
1428
01:40:22,016 --> 01:40:23,574
Amen.
1429
01:40:28,589 --> 01:40:30,682
[ Speaking Italian ]
1430
01:40:30,758 --> 01:40:32,123
CHIARA:
Amen.
1431
01:40:47,141 --> 01:40:49,473
Okay, yes.
Okay.
1432
01:41:07,761 --> 01:41:10,195
[ Speaking Italian ]
1433
01:41:10,264 --> 01:41:11,959
Mamma!
1434
01:41:15,602 --> 01:41:17,934
[ Guests chanting ]
1435
01:41:19,440 --> 01:41:20,737
[ Cheering ]
1436
01:41:33,487 --> 01:41:35,580
What are you thinking?
1437
01:41:35,656 --> 01:41:37,214
What do I think?
1438
01:41:37,324 --> 01:41:38,689
Tell me.
1439
01:41:40,694 --> 01:41:43,424
I think you got your wish.
1440
01:41:43,497 --> 01:41:45,590
My wish?
1441
01:41:45,666 --> 01:41:47,861
That day we looked
for your snake
1442
01:41:47,935 --> 01:41:51,336
you said to me that you wanted
there to be a wedding here.
1443
01:42:00,047 --> 01:42:01,674
Yeah.
1444
01:42:01,782 --> 01:42:04,808
And you said you wanted there
to be a family here.
1445
01:42:11,792 --> 01:42:13,384
You're right.
1446
01:42:14,862 --> 01:42:16,659
I got my wish.
1447
01:42:18,132 --> 01:42:20,464
I got everything
that I asked for.
1448
01:42:47,094 --> 01:42:48,891
Mi scusi.
1449
01:42:48,962 --> 01:42:51,795
[ Speaking faltering Italian ]
1450
01:42:55,235 --> 01:42:57,829
You are looking for the American
writer who lives here,
1451
01:42:57,905 --> 01:43:00,032
and you found her.
1452
01:43:01,108 --> 01:43:03,906
If you don't mind, I'll just...
1453
01:43:06,380 --> 01:43:07,210
There.
1454
01:43:07,281 --> 01:43:10,808
It was crawling on you.
1455
01:43:10,918 --> 01:43:12,351
A ladybug.
1456
01:43:12,419 --> 01:43:13,647
Huh.
1457
01:43:18,425 --> 01:43:22,361
Do I know you?
1458
01:43:22,429 --> 01:43:24,021
Not really.
1459
01:43:24,097 --> 01:43:25,997
You reviewed
one of my books once.
1460
01:43:26,066 --> 01:43:27,966
Did I like it?
1461
01:43:28,035 --> 01:43:29,093
Not very much.
1462
01:43:29,169 --> 01:43:31,103
- Oh, no.
- Don't worry.
1463
01:43:31,171 --> 01:43:36,199
It was, by far, the very best
bad review I've ever received.
1464
01:43:36,310 --> 01:43:37,174
You're kidding.
1465
01:43:37,244 --> 01:43:38,176
I'm not.
1466
01:43:38,245 --> 01:43:41,874
It helped me get to
my next book.
1467
01:43:41,982 --> 01:43:45,713
Anyway, I've been traveling
around Tuscany.
1468
01:43:45,786 --> 01:43:48,482
Someone said that
you lived up here.
1469
01:43:51,725 --> 01:43:53,090
I'm Ed.
1470
01:43:53,160 --> 01:43:54,218
Hi.
1471
01:43:54,294 --> 01:43:55,056
Hi.
1472
01:43:55,128 --> 01:43:56,755
Hi.
1473
01:43:56,830 --> 01:43:58,991
I'm Frances.
1474
01:43:59,066 --> 01:43:59,760
Hi.
1475
01:43:59,833 --> 01:44:01,095
Hi.
1476
01:44:01,835 --> 01:44:05,066
There's a wedding going on.
This isn't your wedding.
1477
01:44:05,138 --> 01:44:08,198
That would be unfortunate.
1478
01:44:25,993 --> 01:44:29,622
They say they built
the train tracks over the Alps
1479
01:44:29,696 --> 01:44:33,029
before there was a train
that could make the trip.
1480
01:44:33,100 --> 01:44:34,863
They built it anyway.
1481
01:44:34,935 --> 01:44:37,665
They knew one day
the train would come.
1482
01:44:39,773 --> 01:44:42,640
Any arbitrary turning
along the way,
1483
01:44:42,709 --> 01:44:44,472
and I would be elsewhere.
1484
01:44:44,544 --> 01:44:46,444
I would be different.
1485
01:44:48,515 --> 01:44:50,915
What are four walls, anyway?
1486
01:44:50,984 --> 01:44:52,884
They are what they contain.
1487
01:44:52,953 --> 01:44:55,717
The house protects the dreamer.
1488
01:44:55,789 --> 01:45:00,158
Unthinkably good things can
happen, even late in the game.
1489
01:45:00,260 --> 01:45:02,524
It's such a surprise.
1490
01:45:12,000 --> 01:45:32,000
Subtitle Ripped by GRuPoUToPiA
http://grupoutopia.cjb.net/