1
00:03:00,997 --> 00:03:02,726
You derelicts know what time it is?

2
00:03:02,966 --> 00:03:03,694
What?

3
00:03:03,867 --> 00:03:06,631
It is bug-betting time! All right?!

4
00:03:07,036 --> 00:03:09,869
First bug to get fried wins $2.
I got the green one.

5
00:03:10,039 --> 00:03:11,370
$2 on the June bug.

6
00:03:16,145 --> 00:03:20,377
You must actually let go of the
money in order for it to be a bet.

7
00:03:20,550 --> 00:03:23,986
Round and round she goes,
where she stops... Number 2!

8
00:03:34,163 --> 00:03:36,654
Any of you shitheads ever get bored?

9
00:03:37,734 --> 00:03:39,167
You ever get bored?

10
00:03:40,737 --> 00:03:42,500
'Cause I got a riddle.

11
00:03:44,240 --> 00:03:47,334
Takes about 2 ounces of
brains to figure it out.

12
00:03:47,744 --> 00:03:50,679
Anybody think they got a
brain with 2 ounces of brain?

13
00:03:50,847 --> 00:03:52,906
There's a rumor Earl does.

14
00:03:54,183 --> 00:03:58,176
For chrissakes, boys, come on, a little
self-confidence from the gallery.

15
00:03:58,354 --> 00:04:00,015
This ain't long division.

16
00:04:00,189 --> 00:04:02,749
- How much we got to lose?
- Want to liven things up?

17
00:04:02,926 --> 00:04:04,689
That's a hell of an idea!

18
00:04:05,595 --> 00:04:09,031
Everyone puts in 20 bucks.
Pot goes to whoever solves the riddle.

19
00:04:09,198 --> 00:04:10,756
You'll get the riddle.

20
00:04:12,602 --> 00:04:14,934
I'm the one asking the riddle.

21
00:04:15,104 --> 00:04:17,868
I already know the answer.
I don't get a guess.

22
00:04:19,042 --> 00:04:22,102
Although we could say if I get
to 500 bounces on the wedge...

23
00:04:22,779 --> 00:04:25,441
...and no one gets the
riddle, I get the pot.

24
00:04:26,115 --> 00:04:28,879
Now, I know you're thinking
it's an impossible riddle.

25
00:04:29,052 --> 00:04:30,610
It's not. It's easy.

26
00:04:30,787 --> 00:04:33,449
And if somehow, by the
grace of fluke luck...

27
00:04:33,623 --> 00:04:37,719
...I win and y'all don't agree that
it was an easy riddle, then...

28
00:04:38,394 --> 00:04:39,952
...I'll refund your money.

29
00:04:43,299 --> 00:04:44,061
I'm in!

30
00:04:44,334 --> 00:04:45,596
Money in the bank.

31
00:04:45,768 --> 00:04:46,564
I'll hold it.

32
00:04:46,736 --> 00:04:47,464
Give it.

33
00:04:47,637 --> 00:04:50,731
A man's driving down
the road with his son.

34
00:04:50,907 --> 00:04:52,135
He gets in a crash.

35
00:04:52,408 --> 00:04:53,466
Two ambulances come...

36
00:04:53,643 --> 00:04:56,476
...and they take the man and
his son to different hospitals.

37
00:04:57,413 --> 00:04:58,812
Different hospitals.

38
00:04:59,248 --> 00:05:02,308
Son goes into the operating
room, all right?

39
00:05:02,652 --> 00:05:04,813
Doctor looks at him, says:

40
00:05:05,488 --> 00:05:07,581
"I can't operate on this boy.

41
00:05:07,924 --> 00:05:09,152
He's my son."

42
00:05:09,325 --> 00:05:11,657
Now, how is that possible?

43
00:05:12,261 --> 00:05:14,252
How is that possible?

44
00:05:25,441 --> 00:05:26,840
Clock's ticking.

45
00:05:27,010 --> 00:05:28,500
Father's at the other hospital?

46
00:05:28,678 --> 00:05:30,009
He didn't sneak over?

47
00:05:30,179 --> 00:05:31,669
No one beamed him aboard.

48
00:05:31,948 --> 00:05:36,180
All right, what if the father
married the son's daughter?

49
00:05:36,352 --> 00:05:37,683
This is a family riddle.

50
00:05:38,154 --> 00:05:39,348
Think clean thoughts.

51
00:05:39,522 --> 00:05:40,853
Give us a hint.

52
00:05:41,024 --> 00:05:42,457
You want a hint?

53
00:05:43,292 --> 00:05:45,021
The doctor's a woman.

54
00:05:47,463 --> 00:05:49,294
The doctor's a woman.

55
00:05:51,200 --> 00:05:53,464
The doctor's the son's mother.

56
00:05:53,803 --> 00:05:57,796
Feminists pose the riddle to
reveal sexual stereotypes.

57
00:05:57,974 --> 00:06:00,306
I take it you're a feminist.

58
00:06:02,311 --> 00:06:05,974
I've been called many things,
but never been saddled with that.

59
00:06:06,149 --> 00:06:07,810
You might try being saddled.

60
00:06:08,051 --> 00:06:09,985
Smell of leather, a whip's sting.

61
00:06:10,987 --> 00:06:13,717
I'm just a humble golf pro.
Could I help you?

62
00:06:13,890 --> 00:06:15,380
You're Roy McAvoy?

63
00:06:17,326 --> 00:06:19,817
I pictured something different.

64
00:06:20,496 --> 00:06:21,895
I have a 7:00 lesson.

65
00:06:22,231 --> 00:06:23,664
I thought I had a Dr. Griswold.

66
00:06:27,170 --> 00:06:28,501
That's me.

67
00:06:38,748 --> 00:06:42,184
First thing you must learn is
this game ain't about hitting...

68
00:06:42,351 --> 00:06:43,682
...a ball in a hole.

69
00:06:43,853 --> 00:06:47,687
It's about inner demons,
self-doubt, human frailty...

70
00:06:47,857 --> 00:06:49,415
...and overcoming that crap.

71
00:06:49,592 --> 00:06:52,254
What kind of doctor
did you say you were?

72
00:06:52,428 --> 00:06:53,417
Psychologist.

73
00:06:53,930 --> 00:06:58,196
I'm a neo-Jungian, post-modern
Freudian, holistic secularist.

74
00:07:00,203 --> 00:07:01,363
Okay.

75
00:07:02,038 --> 00:07:04,438
Inner demons and human
frailty is my life's work.

76
00:07:04,607 --> 00:07:07,440
I used to practice in El Paso,
but I moved here now.

77
00:07:07,777 --> 00:07:09,711
What is all this stuff?

78
00:07:09,879 --> 00:07:11,608
I got it from the Golf Channel.

79
00:07:11,781 --> 00:07:14,375
Well, it's a waste of money.

80
00:07:14,784 --> 00:07:19,050
I'm sure there are some
excesses and repetitions here,

81
00:07:19,222 --> 00:07:21,554
but I believe in gathering knowledge.

82
00:07:21,724 --> 00:07:24,716
There must be some truth to the
golf swing illustrated here...

83
00:07:24,894 --> 00:07:28,057
I thought you would kind of
help me sort through it.

84
00:07:28,231 --> 00:07:30,461
I have dozens of golf videotapes.

85
00:07:30,633 --> 00:07:31,964
I bet she has a golf watch.

86
00:07:32,301 --> 00:07:33,393
Got a golf watch?

87
00:07:33,970 --> 00:07:35,904
I think I got a good one.

88
00:07:36,239 --> 00:07:37,399
Right there.

89
00:07:37,807 --> 00:07:39,240
Take it off.

90
00:07:39,475 --> 00:07:40,134
Off?

91
00:07:40,309 --> 00:07:42,641
All of it, right now. All of it.

92
00:07:42,812 --> 00:07:45,144
You're a smart woman, for chrissakes.

93
00:07:46,782 --> 00:07:49,273
Don't you know the work of
hustlers when you see it?

94
00:07:49,452 --> 00:07:50,783
Well, no.

95
00:07:52,088 --> 00:07:53,316
I mean...

96
00:07:54,157 --> 00:07:56,921
...I can always tell when
someone's lying to himself.

97
00:07:57,093 --> 00:08:00,256
But I'm susceptible and frequently
wrong when a person lies to me.

98
00:08:00,429 --> 00:08:02,920
This stuff cost me over $200.

99
00:08:03,099 --> 00:08:05,260
It's $200 of shit.

100
00:08:06,502 --> 00:08:08,595
Well, that's just great.

101
00:08:08,771 --> 00:08:11,672
Let's do this the old-fashioned way.
Just swing.

102
00:08:12,441 --> 00:08:13,601
All right.

103
00:08:22,185 --> 00:08:23,174
Come up.

104
00:08:26,122 --> 00:08:27,350
Excuse me.

105
00:08:32,195 --> 00:08:33,457
Fuck.

106
00:08:35,631 --> 00:08:37,462
You talk like a golfer.

107
00:08:37,633 --> 00:08:40,193
That's a pretty girl to
have such an ugly swing.

108
00:08:41,804 --> 00:08:42,964
Oh, God!

109
00:08:43,139 --> 00:08:44,629
Oh, that hurt.

110
00:08:44,807 --> 00:08:45,865
Shit!

111
00:08:47,710 --> 00:08:49,143
"Fuck." "Shit."

112
00:08:49,312 --> 00:08:51,143
These are technical golf terms.

113
00:08:51,314 --> 00:08:53,305
You're using them on your first lesson.

114
00:08:53,883 --> 00:08:55,316
This is promising.

115
00:08:55,484 --> 00:08:56,314
Great.

116
00:08:56,719 --> 00:08:59,552
Wise-ass. Show me. Just go ahead.

117
00:09:13,736 --> 00:09:15,169
Something like that.

118
00:09:16,072 --> 00:09:17,562
That's impressive.

119
00:09:17,840 --> 00:09:20,172
I tend to process things verbally...

120
00:09:20,343 --> 00:09:23,176
...so can you break down
into words how you did that?

121
00:09:28,751 --> 00:09:31,686
"What Is The Golf Swing,"
by Roy McAvoy?

122
00:09:33,522 --> 00:09:35,922
I think of the golf swing as a poem.

123
00:09:36,092 --> 00:09:38,185
He's doing that poetry thing again.

124
00:09:38,361 --> 00:09:41,592
The opening phrase of this
poem will always be the grip.

125
00:09:41,864 --> 00:09:45,766
The hands unite to form a single
unit by the simple overlap of the...

126
00:09:46,936 --> 00:09:48,028
...little finger.

127
00:09:48,204 --> 00:09:48,932
Right.

128
00:09:49,272 --> 00:09:51,365
Lowly and slowly...

129
00:09:51,540 --> 00:09:55,203
...the club head is led back, pulled
into position not by the hands,

130
00:09:55,378 --> 00:09:57,539
...but the body, which turns
away from the target,

131
00:09:57,713 --> 00:10:00,614
...shifting weight to the right side
without shifting balance.

132
00:10:00,783 --> 00:10:05,049
Tempo is all, perfection unattainable,
as at the top of the swing...

133
00:10:05,221 --> 00:10:08,122
...there's a hesitation,
a little nod to the gods.

134
00:10:08,958 --> 00:10:11,051
A nod to the gods?

135
00:10:11,560 --> 00:10:14,290
To the gods that he is fallible.

136
00:10:14,897 --> 00:10:16,797
That perfection is unattainable.

137
00:10:16,966 --> 00:10:20,902
Weight shifts to the left pulled
by the powers in the earth...

138
00:10:21,070 --> 00:10:23,231
...it's alive, this swing,
and a sculpture...

139
00:10:23,406 --> 00:10:25,738
...and down through contact...

140
00:10:25,908 --> 00:10:28,069
...striking the ball crisply...

141
00:10:28,311 --> 00:10:29,573
...with character.

142
00:10:29,745 --> 00:10:33,579
A tuning fork goes off in
your heart, your balls...

143
00:10:34,483 --> 00:10:37,577
...such a pure feeling is
the well-struck golf shot.

144
00:10:38,487 --> 00:10:40,478
Then the follow-through to finish...

145
00:10:40,656 --> 00:10:42,089
...always on line.

146
00:10:42,258 --> 00:10:44,988
The reverse-C of the Golden Bear...

147
00:10:45,594 --> 00:10:48,495
...the steelworkers' power and
the brawn of Carl Sandburg's...

148
00:10:48,831 --> 00:10:50,594
...Arnold Palmer!

149
00:10:51,600 --> 00:10:53,431
He's doing the
"Arnold Palmer" thing.

150
00:10:54,270 --> 00:10:56,170
And the unfinished symphony of...

151
00:10:56,505 --> 00:10:58,268
...Roy McAvoy.

152
00:11:00,109 --> 00:11:01,838
What's unfinished?

153
00:11:02,945 --> 00:11:06,779
I have a short follow-through.
It has an unfinished look.

154
00:11:07,516 --> 00:11:08,505
Why?

155
00:11:09,952 --> 00:11:14,116
Some say it's the easiest way to
play in the winds of west Texas...

156
00:11:14,290 --> 00:11:18,351
...some say it's because I never
finished anything in my life.

157
00:11:19,128 --> 00:11:21,619
You can decide. But the point is...

158
00:11:21,864 --> 00:11:24,128
...every finishing position is unique.

159
00:11:26,635 --> 00:11:28,535
That's what the golf swing's about.

160
00:11:29,872 --> 00:11:32,807
It's about gaining control
of your life and...

161
00:11:33,042 --> 00:11:35,135
...letting go at the same time.

162
00:11:37,546 --> 00:11:38,808
Jeez Louise.

163
00:11:38,981 --> 00:11:41,973
There's only one other acceptable
theory about how to hit the ball.

164
00:11:42,151 --> 00:11:44,711
Oh, boy, well, I'm afraid to ask.

165
00:11:44,887 --> 00:11:46,878
What's the other theory?

166
00:11:47,056 --> 00:11:49,047
Grip it and rip it.

167
00:11:51,727 --> 00:11:53,718
Well, you know...

168
00:11:54,397 --> 00:11:57,730
...while I do appreciate your
poetic sensibility, Mr. McAvoy...

169
00:11:57,900 --> 00:11:59,731
Call me Roy, Molly.

170
00:11:59,902 --> 00:12:04,566
Call me Dr. Griswold, Roy. I think I'm
more of the grip it and rip it school.

171
00:12:05,141 --> 00:12:07,132
Then let's tee it up.

172
00:12:07,510 --> 00:12:08,909
All right, waggle.

173
00:12:10,246 --> 00:12:11,338
Waggle.

174
00:12:12,848 --> 00:12:13,837
No, look.

175
00:12:14,016 --> 00:12:15,574
He's got her waggling now.

176
00:12:16,018 --> 00:12:17,417
Waggle the...

177
00:12:17,586 --> 00:12:19,349
...club head, okay?

178
00:12:20,356 --> 00:12:22,688
It's a relaxing ritual we do.

179
00:12:23,526 --> 00:12:24,925
Just waggle it.

180
00:12:27,363 --> 00:12:29,593
Waggle it and let the big dog eat.

181
00:12:31,867 --> 00:12:32,925
What big dog?

182
00:12:33,202 --> 00:12:34,931
The driver, the #1-wood.

183
00:12:35,104 --> 00:12:36,867
- This is metal.
- All woods are.

184
00:12:37,039 --> 00:12:38,939
The driver's known as the big dog.

185
00:12:39,108 --> 00:12:42,100
I'm just saying let him
loose, let it rip...

186
00:12:42,278 --> 00:12:44,041
...let the big dog eat.

187
00:12:56,692 --> 00:12:59,456
You know, this is without a doubt
the stupidest, silliest...

188
00:12:59,528 --> 00:13:02,895
...most idiotic, grotesquely
masquerading game ever invented.

189
00:13:03,065 --> 00:13:05,397
Yes, that's why I love it.

190
00:13:05,568 --> 00:13:07,900
If you hit one good shot...

191
00:13:08,070 --> 00:13:10,800
...and that tuning fork
rings in your loins...

192
00:13:12,308 --> 00:13:13,741
...and you can't wait...

193
00:13:13,909 --> 00:13:14,898
...to get back.

194
00:13:15,244 --> 00:13:16,643
Try it again.

195
00:13:28,824 --> 00:13:30,985
The big dog just ate something.

196
00:13:32,761 --> 00:13:35,662
Did that tuning fork ring in your loins?

197
00:13:35,998 --> 00:13:38,330
Well, I wouldn't go that far.

198
00:13:40,002 --> 00:13:42,334
I always say quit on a good shot.

199
00:13:42,505 --> 00:13:44,496
We'll call that lesson #1?

200
00:13:45,274 --> 00:13:46,502
Okay.

201
00:13:47,009 --> 00:13:48,169
And...

202
00:13:49,111 --> 00:13:50,772
...if you wouldn't mind...

203
00:13:50,946 --> 00:13:52,675
...paying me in cash?

204
00:13:53,015 --> 00:13:56,951
There's a little situation
I'm dealing with the IRS.

205
00:13:57,119 --> 00:14:01,522
I got to bob and weave around the
facts of life, if you know what I mean.

206
00:14:02,525 --> 00:14:04,288
Can I ask you a question?

207
00:14:04,960 --> 00:14:08,361
If you're such a legendary
golfer, as everyone says...

208
00:14:08,531 --> 00:14:11,466
...then why are you, at your age,
out here in the sticks...

209
00:14:11,634 --> 00:14:14,626
...operating a barely-solvent
business, ducking the IRS...

210
00:14:14,803 --> 00:14:19,035
...collecting a few dollars for beer
when you're capable of much more?

211
00:14:23,479 --> 00:14:25,879
Perhaps I'm chock-full of inner demons.

212
00:14:27,383 --> 00:14:28,645
No.

213
00:14:28,817 --> 00:14:30,717
You're chock-full of bullshit.

214
00:14:31,654 --> 00:14:32,814
Anyway...

215
00:14:32,988 --> 00:14:34,546
...same time next week?

216
00:14:40,062 --> 00:14:43,225
What'd you mean I should
try being saddled sometime?

217
00:14:45,167 --> 00:14:48,330
Were you being literal or
was that some Freudian deal?

218
00:14:49,071 --> 00:14:50,231
Molly?

219
00:14:50,406 --> 00:14:51,236
Doctor?

220
00:14:51,407 --> 00:14:53,238
What kind of saddle?

221
00:15:19,068 --> 00:15:22,560
David Simms. What the
hell are you doing here?

222
00:15:22,738 --> 00:15:24,330
Hey, there, Romeo.

223
00:15:24,974 --> 00:15:26,134
Been a while.

224
00:15:27,576 --> 00:15:29,066
Tin Cup around?

225
00:15:29,411 --> 00:15:32,574
No, he's in Houston on business.

226
00:15:32,748 --> 00:15:33,578
You know.

227
00:15:34,249 --> 00:15:37,241
I thought you were supposed to
be out on the pro golf tour.

228
00:15:39,922 --> 00:15:44,655
You tell Tin Cup that I'm in town for
my big charity Best Ball Tournament.

229
00:15:45,594 --> 00:15:47,357
I got a spot for him.

230
00:15:47,496 --> 00:15:49,589
If he ever gets back from...

231
00:15:50,432 --> 00:15:52,093
Houston.

232
00:15:52,267 --> 00:15:53,928
Yeah, wherever.

233
00:15:54,370 --> 00:15:55,598
I thought you hated him.

234
00:15:55,771 --> 00:15:58,604
Hell, I haven't even thought
about him in a dozen years.

235
00:16:01,276 --> 00:16:04,268
Not since the good old days at
the University of Houston...

236
00:16:04,513 --> 00:16:07,004
...where we won all
them titles together.

237
00:16:07,950 --> 00:16:09,383
God almighty.

238
00:16:09,685 --> 00:16:12,950
He says he carried you on
his back all them years.

239
00:16:13,122 --> 00:16:16,523
I didn't have much craft
back then, just a little...

240
00:16:16,692 --> 00:16:18,387
...native ability.

241
00:16:19,395 --> 00:16:20,953
Now, old Roy...

242
00:16:21,296 --> 00:16:23,457
...he's a hell of a ball-striker.

243
00:16:23,699 --> 00:16:24,791
What do you want?

244
00:16:26,702 --> 00:16:29,535
- I want to win my own tournament.
- I bet you do.

245
00:16:29,972 --> 00:16:34,136
He can help me if we can behave
like grown-ups together.

246
00:16:35,310 --> 00:16:36,902
You never know.

247
00:16:39,782 --> 00:16:41,215
You tell him that.

248
00:16:41,417 --> 00:16:43,044
I'll be sure to tell him.

249
00:16:43,986 --> 00:16:45,817
What's the catch?

250
00:16:48,924 --> 00:16:50,323
Hello, Cup.

251
00:16:51,326 --> 00:16:53,157
There is no catch.

252
00:16:53,562 --> 00:16:55,223
I put together a tournament...

253
00:16:55,431 --> 00:16:57,922
...with an elite field of players...

254
00:16:58,067 --> 00:17:00,160
...and a half-million dollar purse.

255
00:17:00,569 --> 00:17:03,732
And, by God, I'm tired of seeing
the money head out of town.

256
00:17:03,939 --> 00:17:05,338
Make more birdies.

257
00:17:10,946 --> 00:17:12,846
That's where you come in.

258
00:17:13,082 --> 00:17:14,743
I need you on my team.

259
00:17:15,084 --> 00:17:17,678
Well, I repeat: What's the catch?

260
00:17:17,853 --> 00:17:21,186
We're playing Cottonwood,
where you once shot a 59.

261
00:17:21,356 --> 00:17:24,519
Where you can still
shoot a 65 in your sleep.

262
00:17:24,693 --> 00:17:29,255
You know every bump on the fairway
and every subtle break on every green.

263
00:17:29,765 --> 00:17:31,198
Hot tub, Roy?

264
00:17:33,368 --> 00:17:34,699
It's a spa.

265
00:17:37,039 --> 00:17:39,269
You and me at Cottonwood?

266
00:17:39,775 --> 00:17:41,470
Kind of like old times.

267
00:17:45,481 --> 00:17:46,277
Yeah.

268
00:17:46,482 --> 00:17:48,973
Well, put her there, partner!

269
00:17:49,485 --> 00:17:52,886
These two homeboys will show the
world what golf in Texas is about!

270
00:17:53,789 --> 00:17:56,053
I'll be a birdie-making machine!

271
00:17:56,992 --> 00:17:59,722
Whoa, whoa, wait a minute there, Roy.

272
00:17:59,895 --> 00:18:03,729
I didn't mean I wanted you to play
with me. I want you to caddy.

273
00:18:03,899 --> 00:18:07,232
You know, read the greens,
club me, that kind of stuff.

274
00:18:15,010 --> 00:18:16,068
Caddy?

275
00:18:16,645 --> 00:18:18,237
Come on, Roy.

276
00:18:18,413 --> 00:18:21,507
I can't bring a guy in off the
street to play in my tournament.

277
00:18:23,652 --> 00:18:27,748
For chrissakes, guys, this
has become a big-time event.

278
00:18:28,090 --> 00:18:31,423
Hell, I got corporate sponsors
and 30 bucks a ticket.

279
00:18:31,593 --> 00:18:35,427
This guy off the street can
kick your ass at golf anytime.

280
00:18:35,597 --> 00:18:37,030
Like he did in Junior Golf.

281
00:18:37,166 --> 00:18:39,100
Like he did in... No, fuck it.

282
00:18:42,538 --> 00:18:44,028
I'll give you $100.

283
00:18:44,540 --> 00:18:46,770
And 5% of any earnings.

284
00:18:47,676 --> 00:18:49,439
Get out of here!

285
00:18:49,678 --> 00:18:53,341
Take your pinche color coordinated
sponsored chingada and...

286
00:18:53,549 --> 00:18:56,609
...and take a flying fuck on the...
No, I got it.

287
00:19:00,122 --> 00:19:01,783
I was just offering work.

288
00:19:01,957 --> 00:19:03,117
Thank you very much.

289
00:19:08,363 --> 00:19:09,853
I'll take the job.

290
00:19:10,799 --> 00:19:13,063
Yeah, we'll take the job.

291
00:19:43,799 --> 00:19:46,461
It might be more than
you got in your bag.

292
00:19:46,635 --> 00:19:48,125
I could make that.

293
00:19:51,473 --> 00:19:52,701
Shit.

294
00:19:55,644 --> 00:19:56,702
Is he on?

295
00:19:57,379 --> 00:19:58,539
He's on.

296
00:19:58,814 --> 00:20:00,805
Pretty good shape too.

297
00:20:01,583 --> 00:20:04,814
Tin Cup can do it. I seen
him do it lots of times.

298
00:20:05,554 --> 00:20:08,045
You have extra-large huevos.

299
00:20:24,907 --> 00:20:26,067
Son-of-a-bitch.

300
00:20:26,241 --> 00:20:27,902
I told you.

301
00:20:28,076 --> 00:20:32,342
I had to. Your caddy said he'd
get on the green from here.

302
00:20:34,416 --> 00:20:35,678
I could.

303
00:20:40,856 --> 00:20:43,086
I got to hand it to you, Roy.

304
00:20:43,425 --> 00:20:47,361
For 15 holes, you seemed
to grasp the concept here.

305
00:20:47,529 --> 00:20:51,192
I'm trying to win this tournament
and your job is to help me.

306
00:20:54,369 --> 00:20:55,358
7-iron.

307
00:20:55,537 --> 00:20:56,868
I'm going to lay up.

308
00:21:00,542 --> 00:21:02,942
You can make that shot. Hell, I can.

309
00:21:03,111 --> 00:21:04,203
Easy.

310
00:21:05,547 --> 00:21:10,041
I know I can make this damn shot,
but the smart play is to lay up.

311
00:21:11,219 --> 00:21:15,588
These people didn't pay 30 bucks to see
a tour star lay up on a short par 5.

312
00:21:15,757 --> 00:21:18,590
I'm sitting on a 2-shot
lead with 3 to go.

313
00:21:18,760 --> 00:21:21,251
Thanks to you, my
partner's in his pocket.

314
00:21:21,430 --> 00:21:22,829
Suddenly, par's a hell
of a number to me.

315
00:21:23,365 --> 00:21:25,765
13 years on the tour,
you're still a pussy.

316
00:21:25,934 --> 00:21:30,200
Goddamn it, David, just hit
the fucking 3! Hit it!

317
00:21:30,772 --> 00:21:33,002
13 years in the driving range.

318
00:21:33,208 --> 00:21:36,507
You still think this game is
about your testosterone count.

319
00:21:37,012 --> 00:21:38,206
Back up.

320
00:21:41,717 --> 00:21:44,015
230 to carry, and the tour stars...

321
00:21:44,219 --> 00:21:45,516
...lay it up.

322
00:21:56,732 --> 00:21:58,461
Simms, from the rough.

323
00:21:58,633 --> 00:22:00,032
That's a smart play.

324
00:22:07,642 --> 00:22:09,473
You in a hurry, or what?

325
00:22:09,644 --> 00:22:10,372
Why?

326
00:22:10,545 --> 00:22:13,639
I bet Mickelson and McCord your
caddy can knock it on from here.

327
00:22:15,384 --> 00:22:18,376
Come on, guys, we're trying
to win a tournament here.

328
00:22:18,553 --> 00:22:21,488
We are. But I got 5-1.
I think they're good odds.

329
00:22:21,656 --> 00:22:22,748
He can do it.

330
00:22:22,991 --> 00:22:25,323
Let him hit it, it's only an exhibition.

331
00:22:25,494 --> 00:22:26,483
Come on.

332
00:22:26,762 --> 00:22:28,389
You can do it. I got a ball.

333
00:22:28,663 --> 00:22:29,391
Right here.

334
00:22:29,998 --> 00:22:31,056
Come on.

335
00:22:31,266 --> 00:22:33,393
Balls versus brains.

336
00:22:34,169 --> 00:22:36,069
You hit that shot, keep walking.

337
00:22:36,271 --> 00:22:38,000
'Cause your ass is fired.

338
00:22:46,081 --> 00:22:48,515
How'll you do that in front of everyone?

339
00:22:49,084 --> 00:22:51,279
Especially when I knock it on the green.

340
00:22:51,420 --> 00:22:54,082
It looks like the caddy
wants to hit the shot.

341
00:22:54,790 --> 00:22:56,348
What's going on down there?

342
00:22:56,691 --> 00:22:57,851
Boys...

343
00:22:58,026 --> 00:23:00,290
...things have officially changed here.

344
00:23:00,429 --> 00:23:03,193
Forget the 2-shot lead.
Forget the 3 holes to go.

345
00:23:03,365 --> 00:23:05,196
You need a glove.

346
00:23:05,867 --> 00:23:07,027
It'll help.

347
00:23:07,202 --> 00:23:08,863
Some side action.

348
00:23:09,037 --> 00:23:13,440
And the $250,000 purse has
just gotten a little bigger.

349
00:23:14,376 --> 00:23:17,106
You don't think this guy
can pull this shot off?

350
00:23:17,312 --> 00:23:20,110
I'll tell you, I don't
think there's any chance.

351
00:23:20,315 --> 00:23:23,045
This impending disaster's
a driving range pro.

352
00:23:23,218 --> 00:23:26,381
His name is Roy McAvoy
and he's called Tin Cup.

353
00:23:26,555 --> 00:23:30,389
I'm told he was a pretty good college
player, then went on mini-tours.

354
00:23:30,826 --> 00:23:33,556
He'll have to have been a great
college player to pull this off.

355
00:23:33,728 --> 00:23:36,822
He's got 240 yards, he's a
got a television audience.

356
00:23:36,965 --> 00:23:39,331
And he hasn't hit a golf ball yet.

357
00:23:39,468 --> 00:23:41,402
We don't see this everyday.

358
00:23:41,570 --> 00:23:44,232
National television, no warm-up.

359
00:23:44,406 --> 00:23:46,067
I don't know who this guy is.

360
00:23:46,241 --> 00:23:50,735
If he gets it out of there, I'd be
surprised. A pro I'd give 10-1.

361
00:23:50,912 --> 00:23:52,402
Dollar bills.

362
00:23:56,151 --> 00:23:57,743
He's not that good!

363
00:23:59,154 --> 00:24:01,349
Do you believe this?

364
00:24:04,860 --> 00:24:06,487
What a caddy!

365
00:24:06,661 --> 00:24:08,993
- Great shot.
- Thanks for the glove.

366
00:24:11,366 --> 00:24:12,025
You.

367
00:24:12,100 --> 00:24:14,432
Yeah, you, come here. Come here.

368
00:24:15,604 --> 00:24:16,468
Can you carry that?

369
00:24:17,272 --> 00:24:18,364
Pick it up.

370
00:24:22,377 --> 00:24:23,503
Nice shot.

371
00:24:23,678 --> 00:24:25,509
Come here a second.

372
00:24:26,381 --> 00:24:28,679
Take a hike. The loop's over.

373
00:24:28,884 --> 00:24:30,112
What?

374
00:24:30,285 --> 00:24:31,946
You can't fire me.

375
00:24:34,122 --> 00:24:35,384
How can you?

376
00:24:35,524 --> 00:24:38,288
Hey, I just knocked it stiff from 250.

377
00:24:38,793 --> 00:24:40,454
He's always been a jerk.

378
00:24:40,795 --> 00:24:42,126
What about my money?

379
00:24:42,297 --> 00:24:44,959
You hit the shot that took
you out of the money.

380
00:24:45,133 --> 00:24:47,033
Welcome to life on the tour.

381
00:24:48,970 --> 00:24:51,803
The Sports Machine brings
you a bizarre incident...

382
00:24:51,973 --> 00:24:55,136
...at the charity golf event
with tour star David Simms.

383
00:24:55,410 --> 00:24:56,968
Let's go to west Texas...

384
00:24:57,145 --> 00:24:59,705
...where driving range
pro "Tin Cup" McAvoy...

385
00:24:59,915 --> 00:25:03,043
...serving as a caddy to
David Simms at the celebrity event...

386
00:25:03,218 --> 00:25:05,982
...grabbed the 3-wood
out of his own bag...

387
00:25:06,154 --> 00:25:10,147
...and drilled a 240-yard shot
over water to the 16th green...

388
00:25:10,425 --> 00:25:12,222
If I had to do it over...

389
00:25:13,228 --> 00:25:15,059
...I'd still hit that shot.

390
00:25:15,497 --> 00:25:16,828
I know.

391
00:25:17,732 --> 00:25:21,031
You'd bury yourself alive to
prove you could handle a shovel.

392
00:25:21,236 --> 00:25:23,500
You know why?

393
00:25:25,073 --> 00:25:27,507
It's the only way you
could beat Dave Simms.

394
00:25:27,676 --> 00:25:28,665
No.

395
00:25:29,077 --> 00:25:31,238
'Cause you get that look on your face.

396
00:25:31,446 --> 00:25:33,937
Because that shot was a defining moment.

397
00:25:34,082 --> 00:25:37,745
When a defining moment comes along,
you define the moment...

398
00:25:37,953 --> 00:25:39,944
...or the moment defines you.

399
00:25:40,455 --> 00:25:43,356
I did not shrink from the
challenge, I rose to it.

400
00:25:43,525 --> 00:25:47,689
1981, Fort Washington Golf Club,
Fresno, California, ring a bell?

401
00:25:48,263 --> 00:25:50,595
The final tour-qualifying round?

402
00:25:50,765 --> 00:25:52,756
I was playing to win.

403
00:25:53,602 --> 00:25:57,265
Tried to hit the same impossible
cut 3-wood into the wind.

404
00:25:57,606 --> 00:26:00,700
- I was playing to win.
- 5 in a row, out of bounds.

405
00:26:00,875 --> 00:26:02,536
You finally pulled it off...

406
00:26:02,711 --> 00:26:05,544
...and tapped it in for a
crowd-pleasing 13.

407
00:26:05,981 --> 00:26:08,211
A 12 would have got you on the tour.

408
00:26:08,383 --> 00:26:09,543
Now that...

409
00:26:09,718 --> 00:26:11,379
...was a defining moment.

410
00:26:11,620 --> 00:26:14,054
And the definition was "shit."

411
00:26:14,723 --> 00:26:17,283
Greatness courts failure, Romeo.

412
00:26:17,792 --> 00:26:20,124
You may be right, but you know what?

413
00:26:20,895 --> 00:26:23,386
Sometimes power is good enough to win.

414
00:26:31,539 --> 00:26:33,063
We owe her $12,000.

415
00:26:33,241 --> 00:26:35,141
No, I owe her $12,000.

416
00:26:35,310 --> 00:26:38,143
Fine, you owe her $12,000.
Like it makes a difference.

417
00:26:38,313 --> 00:26:39,507
It does.

418
00:26:39,648 --> 00:26:41,309
I only got one rule:

419
00:26:41,516 --> 00:26:44,417
Never bet money you don't
have on a dog race...

420
00:26:44,586 --> 00:26:47,953
...with an ex-girlfriend who is also
a stripper. You broke that rule.

421
00:26:48,123 --> 00:26:51,615
You need tell her something
nice to start off with.

422
00:26:51,826 --> 00:26:53,817
An ice-breaker. That's not hard.

423
00:26:54,029 --> 00:26:57,328
I'll say something. If it don't
come out right, you say it better.

424
00:26:57,532 --> 00:26:59,261
Doreen's looking for you.

425
00:26:59,434 --> 00:27:00,594
I'll bet.

426
00:27:07,175 --> 00:27:08,267
Tin Cup.

427
00:27:08,443 --> 00:27:10,604
Haven't seen you in 3 days.

428
00:27:10,779 --> 00:27:11,609
Been busy.

429
00:27:13,181 --> 00:27:14,170
Hi, sweetie.

430
00:27:14,349 --> 00:27:15,338
Hi, honey.

431
00:27:22,190 --> 00:27:24,124
That better be you, Roy.

432
00:27:24,292 --> 00:27:26,123
Just be nice.

433
00:27:31,299 --> 00:27:32,459
Doreen...

434
00:27:33,568 --> 00:27:36,799
...you're looking
particularly lovely tonight.

435
00:27:37,072 --> 00:27:39,370
It's nicer than the leopard suit.

436
00:27:39,574 --> 00:27:40,802
Cut the shit.

437
00:27:41,209 --> 00:27:43,074
You owe me $12,000.

438
00:27:43,211 --> 00:27:45,577
We're going to pay it, don't worry.

439
00:27:45,714 --> 00:27:47,306
I know you'll pay me.

440
00:27:47,482 --> 00:27:50,144
12 smackeroos. Where is it?

441
00:27:52,387 --> 00:27:54,480
- There.
- What is this?

442
00:27:55,223 --> 00:27:57,487
With equity and inventory it's worth...

443
00:27:58,093 --> 00:28:00,152
...12 grand, more or less.

444
00:28:00,328 --> 00:28:03,229
This is how you think you'll settle up?

445
00:28:03,398 --> 00:28:05,593
By giving me the driving range?

446
00:28:05,734 --> 00:28:10,228
Only on condition you don't sell
right away, and we keep our jobs.

447
00:28:10,405 --> 00:28:14,171
What in the world would I want
with your stupid driving range?

448
00:28:14,409 --> 00:28:15,603
Equity.

449
00:28:15,744 --> 00:28:16,733
Inventory.

450
00:28:16,911 --> 00:28:17,900
Cash flow.

451
00:28:18,113 --> 00:28:20,843
Plus an enhanced stature
in the community...

452
00:28:21,015 --> 00:28:25,111
...and a pre-paid membership
in Salome Chamber of Commerce.

453
00:28:25,920 --> 00:28:27,410
What are your labor costs?

454
00:28:28,189 --> 00:28:30,123
Everybody gets what they get.

455
00:28:33,261 --> 00:28:35,252
The tractor kid gets four.

456
00:28:36,030 --> 00:28:38,260
The tractor kid gets 5 bucks an hour.

457
00:28:39,434 --> 00:28:41,527
Give me, like, 6.

458
00:28:42,937 --> 00:28:45,132
And Romeo gets 10. Cash.

459
00:28:45,273 --> 00:28:46,706
What do you get?

460
00:28:48,276 --> 00:28:49,436
Me?

461
00:28:49,644 --> 00:28:52,272
To stand around and hit golf balls...

462
00:28:52,447 --> 00:28:55,541
...when you're not breaking for
beers or to gather the guys up...

463
00:28:55,717 --> 00:28:58,049
...to bet on which
crow'll fly off first.

464
00:28:59,154 --> 00:29:01,145
You mean my managerial salary?

465
00:29:01,289 --> 00:29:05,726
I'm referring to every nickel you take
from the till, every bag of nuts.

466
00:29:05,894 --> 00:29:08,158
That is what I'm referring to.

467
00:29:08,296 --> 00:29:10,287
He'll take the deal.

468
00:29:11,733 --> 00:29:13,166
What is the deal?

469
00:29:13,668 --> 00:29:17,399
Let's just say the driving
range is worth $10,000.

470
00:29:17,572 --> 00:29:19,563
You still owe me 2.

471
00:29:55,643 --> 00:29:57,235
She's been here a while.

472
00:29:58,980 --> 00:29:59,912
Am I early?

473
00:30:00,415 --> 00:30:05,148
Mr. McAvoy, I can appreciate that you
have a fairly laid-back lifestyle...

474
00:30:05,320 --> 00:30:06,912
...but I have hours to keep.

475
00:30:07,088 --> 00:30:10,819
All right. A former paramour
once ascribed my...

476
00:30:10,992 --> 00:30:14,985
...fluid sense of time to being
born under the sign of Pisces.

477
00:30:15,163 --> 00:30:18,326
Something about floating
through the universe.

478
00:30:18,500 --> 00:30:20,661
Oh, you amuse me, Roy.

479
00:30:21,002 --> 00:30:25,598
But I'm the only woman born after World
War II who thinks astrology's bullshit.

480
00:30:25,773 --> 00:30:27,832
Let's see if the big dog'll eat.

481
00:30:28,176 --> 00:30:29,268
Waggle.

482
00:30:30,612 --> 00:30:31,476
I'm waggling.

483
00:30:31,546 --> 00:30:32,843
Set up to the ball.

484
00:30:33,615 --> 00:30:34,843
I am.

485
00:30:38,419 --> 00:30:40,944
You're trying to wring the club's neck.

486
00:30:41,456 --> 00:30:42,855
Show a little warmth.

487
00:30:43,124 --> 00:30:44,853
A little compassion.

488
00:30:45,527 --> 00:30:47,620
Remember this game's about trust...

489
00:30:47,795 --> 00:30:48,853
...and touch...

490
00:30:49,631 --> 00:30:51,121
...and letting go.

491
00:30:51,299 --> 00:30:54,530
So while I subtly enhance
your technical prospects...

492
00:30:56,137 --> 00:30:59,197
...why don't you tell me
about your personal life.

493
00:30:59,374 --> 00:31:01,035
That's none of your business.

494
00:31:02,644 --> 00:31:04,373
Your boyfriend's a golfer.

495
00:31:04,546 --> 00:31:05,535
That's my bet.

496
00:31:05,713 --> 00:31:07,977
He's the reason you're learning.

497
00:31:08,483 --> 00:31:10,178
Hell, I probably even know him.

498
00:31:10,251 --> 00:31:11,775
Get your hands off her.

499
00:31:15,056 --> 00:31:16,216
Hi, honey.

500
00:31:16,991 --> 00:31:18,253
Hi, darling.

501
00:31:18,693 --> 00:31:21,924
He's taking her to Miami
for the fucking Doral!

502
00:31:22,297 --> 00:31:24,197
I can't compete with that!

503
00:31:24,365 --> 00:31:26,356
You are having a bad week.

504
00:31:26,534 --> 00:31:28,593
She must think I'm a nothing.

505
00:31:28,803 --> 00:31:33,365
Such a loser, a lousy driving
range pro, living in a Winnebago.

506
00:31:33,541 --> 00:31:35,304
She doesn't know you live here.

507
00:31:35,443 --> 00:31:38,071
She knows I'm not taking
her to no Doral...

508
00:31:38,212 --> 00:31:41,204
...for massages and mimosas all weekend.

509
00:31:42,951 --> 00:31:45,943
- I didn't leave it out.
- Well, I didn't.

510
00:31:48,122 --> 00:31:50,113
I must do something with my life.

511
00:31:50,325 --> 00:31:52,225
You just threw that in the spa.

512
00:31:52,393 --> 00:31:55,453
Must rise to a level worthy of
the women who think I'm a joke.

513
00:31:55,630 --> 00:31:58,565
You could go out and win the
U.S. Open. That'd impress her.

514
00:31:58,967 --> 00:32:00,059
What?

515
00:32:00,234 --> 00:32:01,064
Win the Open.

516
00:32:01,736 --> 00:32:04,068
She'll think, "You're wonderful, Roy."

517
00:32:05,974 --> 00:32:08,135
Romeo, that idea has promise.

518
00:32:08,343 --> 00:32:12,473
The U.S. Open? The biggest
golf tournament in the world?

519
00:32:12,647 --> 00:32:14,581
Not just the biggest...

520
00:32:14,916 --> 00:32:17,908
...the most democratic golf
tournament in the world.

521
00:32:18,086 --> 00:32:19,986
- What do you mean?
- It's open.

522
00:32:20,355 --> 00:32:21,481
So?

523
00:32:21,656 --> 00:32:24,591
Anyone with a 2 handicap or
better's got a shot at it.

524
00:32:24,759 --> 00:32:27,922
You just must get through a local
and sectional qualifier, then like...

525
00:32:28,096 --> 00:32:31,429
...Doral or Colonial or
AT&T, they can't keep you out.

526
00:32:31,866 --> 00:32:35,597
They can't ask you if you're
a garbage man or a...

527
00:32:35,770 --> 00:32:38,500
...driving range pro whose
checks are signed by a stripper.

528
00:32:39,007 --> 00:32:40,941
You qualify, you're in.

529
00:32:41,109 --> 00:32:42,440
You don't got the game.

530
00:32:42,610 --> 00:32:44,271
I got every shot in the book.

531
00:32:44,445 --> 00:32:46,276
I'm talking about the game.

532
00:32:46,447 --> 00:32:49,177
The mental game. La
cabeza, you don't got it.

533
00:32:49,617 --> 00:32:53,519
Since you're the authority,
teach me what I ain't...

534
00:32:53,888 --> 00:32:55,378
...and never will be.

535
00:32:55,523 --> 00:32:58,014
What for? You never listen to me.

536
00:32:58,693 --> 00:33:00,524
This time'll be different.

537
00:33:00,695 --> 00:33:01,957
- Right.
- I promise.

538
00:33:02,130 --> 00:33:06,294
You don't have the money to get
your golf clubs out of hock.

539
00:33:06,634 --> 00:33:07,794
That don't fit.

540
00:33:08,403 --> 00:33:10,200
Don't force it if it don't...

541
00:33:11,806 --> 00:33:14,036
Is that what those things were?

542
00:33:14,208 --> 00:33:15,402
Flowers.

543
00:33:16,477 --> 00:33:20,641
You're going to play me
for $400 with those?

544
00:33:20,982 --> 00:33:23,815
And I'll give you two strokes a side.

545
00:33:24,218 --> 00:33:26,311
You ain't got no 400 bucks.

546
00:33:26,487 --> 00:33:28,045
My car title's collateral.

547
00:33:29,057 --> 00:33:31,924
I ain't interested in
that piece of shit.

548
00:33:32,994 --> 00:33:35,929
That's 'cause you think
of it as transportation.

549
00:33:36,064 --> 00:33:37,929
Think of it as bragging rights.

550
00:33:38,166 --> 00:33:42,728
Think of sitting around the bar crowing
about the Cadillac you won from me.

551
00:33:44,005 --> 00:33:47,065
They'll forget all about the
Winnebago you lost to me.

552
00:33:50,978 --> 00:33:53,208
I'll call the INS on you, you midget.

553
00:33:53,381 --> 00:33:56,214
I'll be playing a pink lady today.

554
00:33:56,484 --> 00:33:59,317
That little pink fag ball
supposed to intimidate me?

555
00:34:00,154 --> 00:34:02,645
Not unless I knock it by you.

556
00:34:02,990 --> 00:34:04,548
Louisville Slugger, please.

557
00:34:13,334 --> 00:34:14,323
I believe you're away.

558
00:34:14,502 --> 00:34:16,231
Don't worry about it.

559
00:34:16,471 --> 00:34:18,996
I thought I caught it on the toe.

560
00:34:23,077 --> 00:34:26,069
You drive for show and you
putt for dough, big mouth.

561
00:34:26,247 --> 00:34:29,080
Did you hear that?
Boone was being profound.

562
00:34:29,250 --> 00:34:31,741
Stay out of the rough. I recommend...

563
00:34:32,086 --> 00:34:33,348
...the shovel.

564
00:34:33,521 --> 00:34:34,852
That's what I think.

565
00:34:41,429 --> 00:34:43,260
I want a legitimate swing.

566
00:34:43,431 --> 00:34:44,762
No scooping.

567
00:34:50,371 --> 00:34:51,770
I'll finish.

568
00:34:56,711 --> 00:34:58,611
Get the hell off my course.

569
00:34:58,946 --> 00:35:00,573
Need a receipt?

570
00:35:02,550 --> 00:35:05,383
You know what I think? She's
got you by the huevos.

571
00:35:05,553 --> 00:35:10,286
Your job is to teach me patience and
humility. Don't advise me on love-life.

572
00:35:10,458 --> 00:35:12,585
Not all my thinking
occurs below the belt.

573
00:35:12,827 --> 00:35:16,285
I stand for a few things besides
my next romantic interlude.

574
00:35:16,464 --> 00:35:20,958
You'll have no trouble telling her you
can't teach her until after the Open.

575
00:35:21,135 --> 00:35:24,468
That'd make an issue out of
something that's not an issue.

576
00:35:24,806 --> 00:35:26,068
Besides, I'm focused.

577
00:35:26,240 --> 00:35:27,229
I am!

578
00:35:27,408 --> 00:35:28,807
This is my quest!

579
00:35:28,976 --> 00:35:32,070
This is my stand for the
guys who've had their...

580
00:35:32,246 --> 00:35:35,238
...fill of soulless
robots like David Simms.

581
00:35:35,817 --> 00:35:37,808
He may be a soulless robot...

582
00:35:37,985 --> 00:35:42,479
...but he's a rich, happy soulless robot
with a beautiful doctor-lady girlfriend.

583
00:35:42,657 --> 00:35:45,990
How'll getting into the Open
change her opinion of you?

584
00:35:46,661 --> 00:35:49,494
It'll show her I'm not
who she thinks I am.

585
00:35:49,664 --> 00:35:52,098
You are who she thinks you are, man!

586
00:35:52,266 --> 00:35:56,100
No, I will not give you time
off to go win the Open.

587
00:35:56,270 --> 00:35:57,931
I don't care if it's your quest.

588
00:35:58,105 --> 00:35:59,663
How about my destiny?

589
00:35:59,841 --> 00:36:03,504
Or your destiny. Or any other term
you remember from Cliff Notes.

590
00:36:03,678 --> 00:36:05,612
That looks stupid.

591
00:36:05,780 --> 00:36:07,338
You get mean, then petty.

592
00:36:07,515 --> 00:36:11,451
If you had been just a little nicer
to me when we were an item...

593
00:36:11,619 --> 00:36:14,349
...then maybe I wouldn't
be such a nasty boss.

594
00:36:14,522 --> 00:36:17,116
I have a business to run.
Bye-bye.

595
00:36:17,291 --> 00:36:20,192
Becky, come here, sweetheart.
Right now, hurry up.

596
00:36:20,361 --> 00:36:24,457
Your natural thing is really sweet,
but we don't do natural here.

597
00:36:24,632 --> 00:36:28,033
We do big and bold, colorful
hair, lots of it. Look at me.

598
00:36:28,202 --> 00:36:29,794
That's what we do.

599
00:36:33,307 --> 00:36:36,640
If you're going to take that
tone then we'll talk later.

600
00:36:36,811 --> 00:36:41,544
I'm sorry, I have things to do.
I don't need to be treated like that.

601
00:36:41,716 --> 00:36:43,547
So, good-bye.

602
00:36:45,386 --> 00:36:48,981
It wouldn't kill you just once
to tell her she's beautiful...

603
00:36:49,156 --> 00:36:51,056
...or that she can dance...

604
00:36:51,225 --> 00:36:52,385
...or she's sexy.

605
00:36:52,560 --> 00:36:56,052
Here I am, ready to charge forth
in pursuit of my destiny...

606
00:36:56,230 --> 00:36:58,721
...and I can't get time
off work to do it.

607
00:36:59,834 --> 00:37:03,065
I'm no expert here, but
it seems to me that...

608
00:37:03,237 --> 00:37:05,705
...the pursuit of destiny
isn't something...

609
00:37:05,907 --> 00:37:08,671
...you need to get off
a $7 per hour job to do.

610
00:37:08,843 --> 00:37:10,902
I'm stuck, man. I'm buried.

611
00:37:11,078 --> 00:37:12,340
I need help.

612
00:37:12,513 --> 00:37:15,175
I need advice. I need counseling.

613
00:37:16,584 --> 00:37:17,744
I need a shrink.

614
00:37:18,019 --> 00:37:19,748
You don't know no shrinks.

615
00:37:20,521 --> 00:37:21,852
I know one.

616
00:37:23,524 --> 00:37:25,924
No, no, no, not the doctor-lady.

617
00:37:26,193 --> 00:37:27,353
Why not?

618
00:37:27,495 --> 00:37:31,522
You can't ask her advice about
the woman you're trying to hose.

619
00:37:32,033 --> 00:37:33,261
Why not?

620
00:38:51,779 --> 00:38:53,178
I didn't say shit!

621
00:38:56,517 --> 00:38:58,849
Get in the other room, please.

622
00:39:00,788 --> 00:39:03,518
Sue Ann, honey, it's okay. Okay.

623
00:39:03,691 --> 00:39:06,353
You're going to be fine.
Take a deep breath.

624
00:39:08,629 --> 00:39:10,620
She was crying when she came out.

625
00:39:10,798 --> 00:39:12,459
So maybe it's something you said...

626
00:39:12,633 --> 00:39:14,624
That's the patient exit room.

627
00:39:14,802 --> 00:39:19,034
I knew it was some kind of room.
There were no magazines.

628
00:39:19,206 --> 00:39:21,197
Why are you here?

629
00:39:22,710 --> 00:39:24,200
Therapy.

630
00:39:25,646 --> 00:39:28,046
You've come for therapy? Okay, look.

631
00:39:28,215 --> 00:39:32,481
You need to make an appointment
because I have a client in half an hour.

632
00:39:32,653 --> 00:39:34,814
That's fine, I'm not that fucked up.

633
00:39:35,322 --> 00:39:38,553
Why don't you just have
a seat right there.

634
00:39:38,726 --> 00:39:40,216
Right over there.

635
00:39:58,179 --> 00:40:00,079
So how do I do it?

636
00:40:01,082 --> 00:40:04,677
Therapy, I mean.
How do I start doing it?

637
00:40:06,754 --> 00:40:10,588
In your parlance, "Kick back
and let the big dog eat."

638
00:40:16,697 --> 00:40:20,758
Suppose there's a guy and he's
standing on the shore of a river...

639
00:40:21,535 --> 00:40:26,438
...and river's full of piranhas,
alligators, eddies, shit like that.

640
00:40:26,607 --> 00:40:29,542
And nobody'll even go
down there to dip a toe.

641
00:40:29,710 --> 00:40:34,613
And on the other side of the river's
a million bucks, on this side a boat.

642
00:40:36,951 --> 00:40:38,782
I guess my question is...

643
00:40:38,953 --> 00:40:42,548
...what would possess
a guy to swim for it?

644
00:40:42,723 --> 00:40:44,054
He's an idiot.

645
00:40:44,225 --> 00:40:46,284
No, see, he's a hell of a swimmer.

646
00:40:46,460 --> 00:40:50,556
His problem is more like why
does he always have to...

647
00:40:50,731 --> 00:40:52,289
...rise to the challenge?

648
00:40:52,466 --> 00:40:54,127
He's a juvenile idiot.

649
00:40:54,201 --> 00:40:56,135
You don't understand.

650
00:40:56,837 --> 00:40:59,965
We're talking about you
and your inner demons.

651
00:41:00,574 --> 00:41:02,872
That human frailty you blather about.

652
00:41:02,943 --> 00:41:05,935
Not some mytho-poetic
metaphor you come up with...

653
00:41:06,313 --> 00:41:09,077
...in a feeble and transparent
effort to do yourself credit.

654
00:41:09,617 --> 00:41:11,778
You're going to make me feel lousy?

655
00:41:12,219 --> 00:41:14,779
I want to feel better. What
kind of therapy is this?

656
00:41:15,122 --> 00:41:19,024
You don't have any inner demons.
You have inner crapola.

657
00:41:19,693 --> 00:41:21,183
Inner debris, garbage...

658
00:41:21,262 --> 00:41:23,787
...horseshit in staggering amounts.

659
00:41:23,864 --> 00:41:26,765
I'm not some just jerk
driving range pro...

660
00:41:26,934 --> 00:41:30,768
...who drinks too much booze,
eats too few vegetables, okay?

661
00:41:31,205 --> 00:41:32,399
Sit down.

662
00:41:32,540 --> 00:41:37,204
You're getting defensive, and I want
you to just tell me why you're here.

663
00:41:39,213 --> 00:41:40,407
A woman.

664
00:41:41,215 --> 00:41:42,409
A woman.

665
00:41:43,217 --> 00:41:44,980
Have you asked her out?

666
00:41:45,419 --> 00:41:47,649
Nah, she's seeing a guy.

667
00:41:47,821 --> 00:41:50,790
But he's a real horse's
ass, if you ask me.

668
00:41:50,858 --> 00:41:53,918
Maybe if you shared your heart
with this woman at dinner...

669
00:41:54,061 --> 00:41:56,427
...these issues would be in the open.

670
00:41:57,731 --> 00:41:59,062
I'm afraid she'll say no.

671
00:41:59,233 --> 00:42:04,000
So, your speeches about swimming
across shark-infested waters...

672
00:42:04,171 --> 00:42:07,072
...are about your golf game and
not about your personal life?

673
00:42:09,076 --> 00:42:09,940
Good, then...

674
00:42:10,077 --> 00:42:12,511
I didn't know we'd get
into my personal life.

675
00:42:12,680 --> 00:42:14,238
This is therapy, Roy.

676
00:42:14,448 --> 00:42:15,506
I know, but...

677
00:42:15,683 --> 00:42:17,674
...I didn't know it was that kind.

678
00:42:17,851 --> 00:42:21,343
Let's make this simple.
Please, sit down right here.

679
00:42:21,956 --> 00:42:26,859
Those risks you love to take on the golf
course you talk so poetically about.

680
00:42:27,361 --> 00:42:31,764
You need to apply those risks to
your personal life as passionately.

681
00:42:32,032 --> 00:42:34,023
I should just ask her out?

682
00:42:34,268 --> 00:42:37,704
And risk coming right over the
top, hooking it out of bounds?

683
00:42:37,871 --> 00:42:39,202
Absolutely, Roy.

684
00:42:39,373 --> 00:42:41,534
- That's good.
- No, I'm sorry.

685
00:42:41,709 --> 00:42:42,767
Look...

686
00:42:42,977 --> 00:42:47,539
...all you must do is walk up to
this woman, look her in the eye...

687
00:42:47,715 --> 00:42:48,704
Look at me.

688
00:42:49,283 --> 00:42:52,275
Look her in the eyes, that's right.
Let down your guard...

689
00:42:52,486 --> 00:42:56,718
...and don't try to be cool,
just be honest and take a risk.

690
00:42:56,890 --> 00:42:59,620
And then, whatever happens,
if you act from the heart...

691
00:42:59,793 --> 00:43:01,556
...you can't make a mistake.

692
00:43:18,812 --> 00:43:20,006
Dr. Griswold...

693
00:43:20,414 --> 00:43:21,403
Yes?

694
00:43:22,082 --> 00:43:24,016
I think I'm in love with you.

695
00:43:24,918 --> 00:43:26,476
From the moment I first saw you...

696
00:43:26,553 --> 00:43:30,421
...I knew I was through with
bar girls and strippers and...

697
00:43:30,591 --> 00:43:33,822
...when you first started talking
I was smitten with you...

698
00:43:34,028 --> 00:43:37,327
...and I'm smitten with you more
every day I think of you and...

699
00:43:37,531 --> 00:43:41,831
...the fact you know I'm full of crapola
makes you more attractive to me.

700
00:43:42,036 --> 00:43:44,596
Usually I can bullshit
people, but not you.

701
00:43:44,772 --> 00:43:47,673
And in addition, you
got great legs and...

702
00:43:48,108 --> 00:43:51,771
...most women I'm thinking about
how to get into their pants, with you...

703
00:43:53,681 --> 00:43:55,046
I'm just...

704
00:43:55,282 --> 00:43:57,546
...thinking about
getting into your heart.

705
00:43:59,553 --> 00:44:00,611
Stunned?

706
00:44:02,289 --> 00:44:03,051
So...

707
00:44:03,190 --> 00:44:06,717
...so what about dinner and
we can talk about us...

708
00:44:06,794 --> 00:44:07,783
...and if we have a future...

709
00:44:07,861 --> 00:44:10,125
...and how to drop that
horse's ass boyfriend of yours.

710
00:44:11,298 --> 00:44:12,629
Slow down.

711
00:44:12,800 --> 00:44:14,631
I'm staring eagle in the face.

712
00:44:14,802 --> 00:44:18,203
Just cut the golf talk, please.
Because this is a mistake.

713
00:44:18,372 --> 00:44:21,535
I'm acting from the heart,
how can that be a mistake?

714
00:44:21,709 --> 00:44:22,641
Right?

715
00:44:22,810 --> 00:44:24,209
Wrong, Roy.

716
00:44:24,378 --> 00:44:26,209
I mean, shit!

717
00:44:26,380 --> 00:44:28,371
I didn't know you meant me.

718
00:44:28,582 --> 00:44:30,379
Would your advice have been different?

719
00:44:38,659 --> 00:44:42,823
This session is over. I have
someone coming soon. Leave.

720
00:44:44,998 --> 00:44:46,989
I take it your answer is no.

721
00:44:47,334 --> 00:44:51,395
Our relationship is and will
remain strictly professional.

722
00:44:53,107 --> 00:44:54,233
That's it?

723
00:45:00,681 --> 00:45:04,742
I'm going to qualify for the U.S.
Open and kick your boyfriend's ass.

724
00:45:09,523 --> 00:45:13,015
Whatever you think of me, you
should know he hates old people...

725
00:45:13,193 --> 00:45:14,683
...children, dogs...

726
00:45:15,129 --> 00:45:18,530
...and that broad's crying
still in the exit room.

727
00:45:18,699 --> 00:45:20,530
You're still in the exit room.

728
00:45:31,145 --> 00:45:31,941
Hello?!

729
00:45:32,279 --> 00:45:34,042
Dr. Kasseldorf?

730
00:45:34,214 --> 00:45:35,374
You're there.

731
00:45:36,049 --> 00:45:40,247
You said to call if something
came up that confused me...

732
00:45:40,521 --> 00:45:44,321
...and shrinks need shrinks...
But, it happened. You said it would.

733
00:45:44,925 --> 00:45:48,361
A patient thinks he's
falling in love with me.

734
00:45:48,529 --> 00:45:51,521
He's not really a patient,
he's my golf pro, but...

735
00:45:51,732 --> 00:45:55,896
I know that under the circumstance I
should recommend another therapist.

736
00:45:56,069 --> 00:45:58,060
But there aren't any in Salome.

737
00:45:58,238 --> 00:46:02,231
He'd have to drive 100 miles
to Midland or Odessa.

738
00:46:02,409 --> 00:46:05,071
I'm not sure you could
count on help there.

739
00:46:05,245 --> 00:46:06,405
Me?

740
00:46:06,580 --> 00:46:09,174
No, my self-esteem is fine.

741
00:46:09,316 --> 00:46:10,806
My self-esteem is fine.

742
00:46:11,585 --> 00:46:13,746
He's a good-looking man.

743
00:46:14,087 --> 00:46:16,317
Green eyes. I don't know, I mean...

744
00:46:16,490 --> 00:46:18,185
That's not the point, is it?

745
00:46:18,325 --> 00:46:19,815
He's, you know...

746
00:46:19,993 --> 00:46:21,984
...he's kind of cute. He's cute.

747
00:46:23,697 --> 00:46:24,322
But...

748
00:47:51,685 --> 00:47:53,516
You got a beautiful swing.

749
00:47:54,421 --> 00:47:56,184
I'm a beautiful guy.

750
00:47:56,857 --> 00:47:59,519
Look, Roy, I came to apologize, okay?

751
00:47:59,693 --> 00:48:00,682
For what?

752
00:48:00,861 --> 00:48:02,590
You did what I said...

753
00:48:02,796 --> 00:48:05,924
...and I poured cold water
over your efforts. I didn't get it.

754
00:48:06,533 --> 00:48:08,933
I'm a terrible shrink, probably.

755
00:48:09,102 --> 00:48:11,366
Should've stayed in real estate.

756
00:48:11,538 --> 00:48:15,804
Actually, I should have never left
Ohio for that cowboy in Amarillo.

757
00:48:16,543 --> 00:48:18,374
Ever been to Amarillo?

758
00:48:18,612 --> 00:48:20,045
Cowboy?

759
00:48:20,314 --> 00:48:24,375
Yeah. It's not as romantic when
you're actually with one, trust me.

760
00:48:24,551 --> 00:48:27,384
So, the oil man in Dallas or Houston,
I don't know where he was from.

761
00:48:27,554 --> 00:48:29,317
Anyway, he looked great.

762
00:48:29,656 --> 00:48:33,922
After that, I went to the Gulf
and ended up in trailer sales.

763
00:48:34,461 --> 00:48:36,554
Then condos in Corpus Christi.

764
00:48:36,897 --> 00:48:41,630
The bottom, just, boom, fell right out
of the market so I needed a new gig.

765
00:48:41,969 --> 00:48:43,459
A new gig?

766
00:48:43,637 --> 00:48:45,229
Yeah, therapy.

767
00:48:45,405 --> 00:48:49,136
I took all the classes.
I'm legitimate. Legal.

768
00:48:49,343 --> 00:48:52,835
Certified. Fuck! I'm certifiable.
I'm really sorry.

769
00:48:52,980 --> 00:48:54,641
Oh, boy.

770
00:48:55,482 --> 00:48:57,245
Can I have a doughnut?

771
00:49:04,925 --> 00:49:05,653
Thanks.

772
00:49:08,595 --> 00:49:09,857
Okay, look...

773
00:49:09,997 --> 00:49:12,488
I am flattered you asked me out.

774
00:49:13,367 --> 00:49:15,767
I can't accept because
I'm involved with David.

775
00:49:15,936 --> 00:49:19,099
I haven't seen him treat old
people, children or dogs badly.

776
00:49:19,439 --> 00:49:20,872
I'm sorry.

777
00:49:21,008 --> 00:49:24,500
I got carried away with the
David thing. I should have...

778
00:49:24,778 --> 00:49:28,179
I just want to make a
proposal, all right?

779
00:49:29,282 --> 00:49:32,445
As long as you understand that
it's strictly professional...

780
00:49:32,619 --> 00:49:34,382
...we're not going out.

781
00:49:34,521 --> 00:49:35,510
Tee it up.

782
00:49:36,390 --> 00:49:39,621
I think I can help you with
the mental aspects of the game.

783
00:49:39,793 --> 00:49:43,456
Romeo is your swing doctor,
I'll be your head doctor.

784
00:49:43,697 --> 00:49:44,629
What?

785
00:49:45,132 --> 00:49:47,965
You just said yourself
you're a crumby shrink.

786
00:49:48,135 --> 00:49:49,966
I can improve, Roy.

787
00:49:50,137 --> 00:49:53,129
I don't have the money to
pay you! I'm broke!

788
00:49:53,306 --> 00:49:57,208
You don't need any money to pay me!
We'll trade services.

789
00:49:57,978 --> 00:50:01,914
I'll give you my services
for golf lessons and...

790
00:50:02,049 --> 00:50:04,643
...I can help you
through the qualifying.

791
00:50:05,819 --> 00:50:07,980
If you make it into the Open...

792
00:50:08,422 --> 00:50:11,152
I'm on my own, you'll be with David.

793
00:50:20,734 --> 00:50:22,065
I don't want this.

794
00:50:30,744 --> 00:50:34,840
Third in the group, playing out
of Salome, Texas: Roy McAvoy.

795
00:51:08,215 --> 00:51:10,376
Ben Hogan, now, who's he?

796
00:51:10,550 --> 00:51:14,782
I find him mildly attractive when he's
obnoxious and arrogant like this.

797
00:51:14,988 --> 00:51:16,114
Oh, good.

798
00:51:16,289 --> 00:51:17,881
That's his best side.

799
00:51:27,134 --> 00:51:28,499
They bugging you?

800
00:51:28,802 --> 00:51:32,898
Way I'm swinging today, nothing bugs
me except insufficient applause.

801
00:51:34,007 --> 00:51:35,565
Give me the lumber.

802
00:51:35,742 --> 00:51:38,074
I think you want to hit the 2-iron.

803
00:51:39,079 --> 00:51:40,910
I said I want the big dog.

804
00:51:41,515 --> 00:51:43,142
You got a tight par 5 here...

805
00:51:43,316 --> 00:51:46,581
...with out of bounds on the left.
The 2-iron seems best.

806
00:51:46,820 --> 00:51:49,755
I'm not going left or right
of those trees, okay?

807
00:51:49,923 --> 00:51:53,518
I'm going over those
trees, with a little draw.

808
00:51:55,028 --> 00:51:57,758
That way I get home in 2. That
way I'm putting for eagle.

809
00:51:58,765 --> 00:52:00,926
You don't need an eagle to qualify.

810
00:52:01,101 --> 00:52:02,830
Practice playing it safe.

811
00:52:03,036 --> 00:52:05,027
- No mistakes wins the Open.
- I want the course record.

812
00:52:05,172 --> 00:52:06,332
The lumber.

813
00:52:09,943 --> 00:52:11,843
You won't listen to me, will you?

814
00:52:12,679 --> 00:52:15,273
Even when I'm trying to help you, man.

815
00:52:16,449 --> 00:52:17,677
After all these years you
think I'm full of shit?

816
00:52:17,851 --> 00:52:19,944
I'll get penalized for slow play.

817
00:52:20,120 --> 00:52:21,553
Give me the driver.

818
00:52:21,688 --> 00:52:25,454
You're a head case. You always
have been, always will be.

819
00:52:25,625 --> 00:52:26,785
Let's ask her.

820
00:52:26,960 --> 00:52:28,188
Dr. Griswold.

821
00:52:31,464 --> 00:52:33,557
Should I hit the big dog or the 2?

822
00:52:33,967 --> 00:52:36,959
Soliciting shot selection
advice is a 2 stroke penalty.

823
00:52:38,071 --> 00:52:39,470
Trust your feelings.

824
00:52:39,639 --> 00:52:42,199
Now give me the driver and shut up.

825
00:52:45,645 --> 00:52:46,805
The driver?

826
00:52:46,980 --> 00:52:47,969
Fine.

827
00:52:48,582 --> 00:52:49,571
Here.

828
00:52:50,083 --> 00:52:52,074
Hit the driver, Tin Cup.

829
00:52:57,657 --> 00:53:00,217
I changed my mind. Give me the 3-wood.

830
00:53:01,094 --> 00:53:03,654
You can't throw that
dog leg with a 3-wood.

831
00:53:03,830 --> 00:53:05,092
You want to bet?

832
00:53:07,100 --> 00:53:09,000
Fine, take the 3-wood.

833
00:53:09,169 --> 00:53:12,229
Take it and show me
what a golf pro does.

834
00:53:18,178 --> 00:53:20,738
Guess I'm going with
the safe shot, boys.

835
00:53:23,016 --> 00:53:25,917
But, you know, sometimes I fan that 2.

836
00:53:28,121 --> 00:53:30,180
You better give me the 3.

837
00:53:30,523 --> 00:53:32,354
Is this normal behavior?

838
00:53:32,525 --> 00:53:36,017
The word normal and him don't
often collide in the same sentence.

839
00:53:38,431 --> 00:53:41,628
And sometimes I catch
that 3 a little thin too.

840
00:53:42,135 --> 00:53:44,262
- Don't do this.
- I've hit flies with the 4.

841
00:53:45,538 --> 00:53:47,130
Hit the damn ball.

842
00:53:47,274 --> 00:53:49,139
I've hooked my 5.

843
00:53:49,776 --> 00:53:51,266
I've shanked the 6.

844
00:53:51,444 --> 00:53:53,935
Sculled the 8. Fatted the 9.

845
00:53:54,147 --> 00:53:55,205
Chili-dipped the wedge.

846
00:53:56,049 --> 00:53:57,710
And I've bladed the sand.

847
00:53:58,718 --> 00:54:00,151
Putter?

848
00:54:00,887 --> 00:54:03,549
There is Mr. 3-Wiggle, isn't there?

849
00:54:08,461 --> 00:54:10,452
But then there's the 7-iron.

850
00:54:11,231 --> 00:54:13,665
I never miss with the 7-iron.

851
00:54:18,171 --> 00:54:20,799
It's the only truly safe club in my bag.

852
00:54:22,976 --> 00:54:25,570
The bag's lighter. You happy?

853
00:54:25,912 --> 00:54:27,675
No, I'm not happy, man.

854
00:54:28,248 --> 00:54:29,738
I'm tired!

855
00:54:31,084 --> 00:54:35,487
My life's too short to watch you blow
up all... I've done it too many times.

856
00:54:36,756 --> 00:54:37,586
Quitting?

857
00:54:38,925 --> 00:54:40,756
Goddamn!

858
00:54:41,494 --> 00:54:43,985
First sign of adversity, you quit.

859
00:54:44,331 --> 00:54:47,994
God! First time you can
qualify for the Open!

860
00:54:48,201 --> 00:54:49,828
What's wrong with you?

861
00:54:51,938 --> 00:54:54,600
Who wants to bet I can't
par with a 7-iron?

862
00:54:58,011 --> 00:54:59,273
Anybody?

863
00:55:03,950 --> 00:55:05,440
Take the bet.

864
00:55:05,618 --> 00:55:07,711
Shut up and hit the ball!

865
00:55:30,043 --> 00:55:31,738
You the man, Cup.

866
00:56:16,089 --> 00:56:17,579
Thank you, boys.

867
00:56:23,863 --> 00:56:27,355
What do you think my best shot was?
The 7-iron on 12?

868
00:56:27,534 --> 00:56:30,298
- That was a good one.
- Or was it 7-iron on 14?

869
00:56:30,437 --> 00:56:31,802
That was better.

870
00:56:31,938 --> 00:56:36,432
What about that bunker shot on 18
which to my recollection was a 7-iron.

871
00:56:36,609 --> 00:56:37,940
Yes, it was!

872
00:56:38,111 --> 00:56:39,100
All good.

873
00:56:39,312 --> 00:56:40,210
You're the man.

874
00:56:40,880 --> 00:56:41,710
Hey, Doc!

875
00:56:43,950 --> 00:56:45,212
How'd I do?

876
00:56:45,718 --> 00:56:47,709
You failed miserably.

877
00:56:47,887 --> 00:56:49,548
What're you talking about?

878
00:56:49,722 --> 00:56:51,451
I qualified for the sectionals.

879
00:56:51,624 --> 00:56:52,556
You did.

880
00:56:52,725 --> 00:56:53,453
I did.

881
00:56:53,893 --> 00:56:55,053
With a 7-iron.

882
00:56:55,395 --> 00:56:56,453
Yes, siree.

883
00:56:56,629 --> 00:57:00,565
Look, your job isn't just
to qualify for the Open.

884
00:57:00,733 --> 00:57:02,564
It's to prepare for the Open.

885
00:57:02,735 --> 00:57:05,135
My job is to help you prepare.

886
00:57:05,839 --> 00:57:08,569
Now, you said trust my feelings.
I did.

887
00:57:09,142 --> 00:57:12,339
I didn't know you felt like
breaking all your clubs...

888
00:57:12,479 --> 00:57:14,572
...and getting in a contest
with your caddy.

889
00:57:14,747 --> 00:57:15,839
Who quit.

890
00:57:15,982 --> 00:57:17,415
He always quits.

891
00:57:19,085 --> 00:57:20,074
He ought to be here.

892
00:57:20,353 --> 00:57:21,081
To the quitter.

893
00:57:22,989 --> 00:57:24,081
The little quitter.

894
00:57:24,757 --> 00:57:25,655
Nonetheless.

895
00:57:25,859 --> 00:57:27,156
Nonetheless...

896
00:57:27,861 --> 00:57:30,921
...from the mental aspect,
which is my domain...

897
00:57:31,164 --> 00:57:32,995
...you've regressed.

898
00:57:33,500 --> 00:57:36,162
And are fumbling between
delusion and denial.

899
00:57:36,369 --> 00:57:38,269
Regression, delusion, denial.

900
00:57:38,438 --> 00:57:41,271
Why must you use all the
psychological language?

901
00:57:42,675 --> 00:57:44,108
Having a bad day?

902
00:57:46,012 --> 00:57:46,944
No.

903
00:57:47,113 --> 00:57:48,273
Hi, honey.

904
00:57:51,384 --> 00:57:52,373
Shot a 65.

905
00:57:54,187 --> 00:57:56,382
Parred the backside with a 7-iron.

906
00:57:57,123 --> 00:57:58,021
Why?

907
00:57:58,191 --> 00:58:01,126
Yeah, that's exactly right.
That's the question, "Why?"

908
00:58:01,294 --> 00:58:03,387
Because he broke his other clubs.

909
00:58:04,197 --> 00:58:05,459
Snapped them in two.

910
00:58:06,299 --> 00:58:08,199
- Jesus.
- Not all of them.

911
00:58:08,401 --> 00:58:09,959
Romeo broke two.

912
00:58:12,405 --> 00:58:14,134
I'm on your side here.

913
00:58:14,307 --> 00:58:15,968
We go way back.

914
00:58:16,142 --> 00:58:19,305
I hope you qualify for the Open.
But if you do...

915
00:58:19,479 --> 00:58:21,709
...you better play with control...

916
00:58:21,981 --> 00:58:23,972
...or you'll get slaughtered.

917
00:58:24,150 --> 00:58:27,551
Good players shoot an 82 in the Open.

918
00:58:28,054 --> 00:58:29,544
You see...

919
00:58:29,722 --> 00:58:32,156
...it means you just can't go for it.

920
00:58:32,559 --> 00:58:36,495
I swear to God, this guy is
not who you think he is.

921
00:58:36,663 --> 00:58:38,221
It's a known fact...

922
00:58:38,431 --> 00:58:41,332
...if a camera's not on him he treats
old people and kids like dirt.

923
00:58:41,501 --> 00:58:42,490
And dogs.

924
00:58:42,835 --> 00:58:44,063
Jesus.

925
00:58:44,337 --> 00:58:46,328
Yeah, don't forget dogs.

926
00:58:46,940 --> 00:58:50,239
Okay, guys. You know what?
We better go. Come on.

927
00:58:50,443 --> 00:58:51,740
I guess so.

928
00:58:53,513 --> 00:58:55,743
You ever shoot par with a 7-iron?

929
00:58:58,585 --> 00:59:00,348
Hell, Roy...

930
00:59:00,520 --> 00:59:02,750
...it never occurred to me to try.

931
00:59:04,023 --> 00:59:07,515
I bet you $1,000 against my car
that I can beat you any game.

932
00:59:09,862 --> 00:59:11,022
Any game...

933
00:59:11,197 --> 00:59:12,357
...any golf club.

934
00:59:13,533 --> 00:59:15,967
Come on, Roy, this is ridiculous.

935
00:59:16,102 --> 00:59:17,364
Chicken?

936
00:59:23,543 --> 00:59:27,536
What, are you going to lay up
the way you did in the Masters?

937
00:59:36,990 --> 00:59:38,719
Any game, I name it?

938
00:59:39,225 --> 00:59:43,127
No, it's okay. I'm just going
to teach old Roy here a lesson.

939
00:59:43,496 --> 00:59:46,988
Why do men insist on
measuring their dicks?

940
00:59:51,571 --> 00:59:53,402
All right, let's measure.

941
00:59:54,741 --> 00:59:58,074
Roy! For God's sakes
I wasn't being literal!

942
00:59:58,511 --> 01:00:00,138
David, let's go.

943
01:00:00,313 --> 01:00:02,645
Wait. Molly, I got this one.

944
01:00:03,082 --> 01:00:07,143
We'll just call this Roy's mental
preparation for the U.S. Opening.

945
01:00:07,320 --> 01:00:11,313
Where the rough is deep, the greens
slick, and the nerves shattered.

946
01:00:11,824 --> 01:00:13,314
I'll take the bet.

947
01:00:18,665 --> 01:00:20,030
What's the game?

948
01:00:20,166 --> 01:00:22,157
Your 7-iron, Roy.

949
01:00:23,836 --> 01:00:25,428
One swing each.

950
01:00:25,772 --> 01:00:27,433
Whoever hits the longest.

951
01:00:28,775 --> 01:00:29,833
It's a lock.

952
01:00:30,043 --> 01:00:33,171
I hit the 7-iron like
John Daly hits the 3.

953
01:00:33,346 --> 01:00:35,041
Winner, winner, chicken dinner!

954
01:00:40,453 --> 01:00:41,613
Here okay?

955
01:00:41,854 --> 01:00:42,946
Fine.

956
01:00:44,290 --> 01:00:46,781
You guys are really being childish.

957
01:00:46,959 --> 01:00:48,051
Leave it to me.

958
01:00:48,461 --> 01:00:50,122
I know what I'm doing.

959
01:00:50,630 --> 01:00:53,121
You know what? I'll
see you both in the bar.

960
01:00:53,299 --> 01:00:54,197
Bye.

961
01:00:58,871 --> 01:01:00,202
Dollar bills.

962
01:01:06,212 --> 01:01:09,306
Them signs are at
least 30 yards further.

963
01:01:09,482 --> 01:01:11,814
That ball must have gone 220.

964
01:01:11,984 --> 01:01:13,884
Nah, 227.

965
01:01:14,887 --> 01:01:16,582
I toed it, but it'll do!

966
01:01:16,723 --> 01:01:18,987
- That's 227.
- Take your time.

967
01:01:19,158 --> 01:01:21,319
Limber up, fine with me.

968
01:01:22,895 --> 01:01:24,328
That's all right.

969
01:01:24,497 --> 01:01:25,725
I don't need to.

970
01:01:26,899 --> 01:01:28,491
Take your jacket off.

971
01:01:29,402 --> 01:01:30,596
I'm fine.

972
01:01:30,737 --> 01:01:34,400
You'll have to muscle up to get
it out there, give it the old...

973
01:01:34,907 --> 01:01:36,499
...steroid jerk!

974
01:01:44,117 --> 01:01:45,914
What the hell is he doing?

975
01:02:07,640 --> 01:02:10,370
He hit it down the
fucking road, didn't he?

976
01:02:10,777 --> 01:02:12,438
It's still going.

977
01:02:22,889 --> 01:02:25,949
You the man, Roy. You the man.

978
01:02:27,059 --> 01:02:29,050
You are definitely the man.

979
01:02:30,797 --> 01:02:31,786
So long!

980
01:02:31,964 --> 01:02:34,455
And the man needs a ride home.

981
01:02:41,507 --> 01:02:43,338
I always liked that car.

982
01:03:01,360 --> 01:03:03,419
I wish Romeo were here.

983
01:03:03,596 --> 01:03:05,587
I'm not cut out for this shit.

984
01:03:05,765 --> 01:03:07,528
I'm an observer by nature.

985
01:03:07,867 --> 01:03:09,425
Earl, shut up.

986
01:03:09,602 --> 01:03:10,933
Give me the big dog.

987
01:03:11,437 --> 01:03:12,597
Big dog!

988
01:03:12,772 --> 01:03:15,036
I thought that was the big fucking dog.

989
01:03:46,806 --> 01:03:48,899
Here, let me carry that.

990
01:03:59,318 --> 01:04:01,252
- You all right?
- Aw, shit.

991
01:04:02,755 --> 01:04:04,245
Give me the bag.

992
01:04:04,423 --> 01:04:05,253
No.

993
01:04:05,992 --> 01:04:07,254
All right.

994
01:04:11,330 --> 01:04:12,592
Get him.

995
01:04:20,273 --> 01:04:23,106
Like a million others you
made in your life, Roy.

996
01:04:23,943 --> 01:04:25,843
Just see it going in.

997
01:04:27,013 --> 01:04:28,446
Just feel it.

998
01:04:29,448 --> 01:04:31,609
Right in the back of the jar.

999
01:04:57,310 --> 01:04:58,709
Lord

1000
01:05:00,446 --> 01:05:02,971
I can't afford to lose

1001
01:05:17,229 --> 01:05:19,163
Romes, you come back!

1002
01:05:20,666 --> 01:05:22,497
You should've been there.

1003
01:05:22,668 --> 01:05:25,330
I drained a 30-foot snake to qualify.

1004
01:05:25,504 --> 01:05:29,497
Earl gives me the straight read,
thing breaks half a dozen times.

1005
01:05:30,843 --> 01:05:33,505
I missed you, pods. I missed you.

1006
01:05:35,514 --> 01:05:38,005
Okay, don't talk. You're still my guy.

1007
01:05:40,920 --> 01:05:44,356
It's a little late to be pissed off.
We're in the Open.

1008
01:05:44,857 --> 01:05:46,256
You and me.

1009
01:05:48,761 --> 01:05:50,353
Fine, be like that.

1010
01:05:51,530 --> 01:05:52,861
Molly been around?

1011
01:05:53,599 --> 01:05:55,931
Neither her nor me or the god of golf...

1012
01:05:56,102 --> 01:05:58,935
...will keep you from
blowing up in the Open.

1013
01:05:59,105 --> 01:06:00,766
I made it this far.

1014
01:06:00,940 --> 01:06:05,377
Didn't I? Didn't I? All I must do is
hold it together for 72 more holes.

1015
01:06:05,778 --> 01:06:09,214
There's a lot of triple-bogies
waiting to grab your white ass.

1016
01:06:09,382 --> 01:06:12,112
You complaining again?
Is that what I hear?

1017
01:06:12,284 --> 01:06:13,615
Shut up.

1018
01:06:14,086 --> 01:06:17,351
You're back whining, pissing,
moaning. You're back.

1019
01:06:18,524 --> 01:06:19,582
You're my man.

1020
01:06:20,259 --> 01:06:23,023
What, you didn't fall in love
with Earl to be your caddy.

1021
01:06:24,030 --> 01:06:26,260
He's a heart attack waiting to happen.

1022
01:06:26,432 --> 01:06:28,696
Cost me 3 strokes a side.

1023
01:06:29,101 --> 01:06:31,865
Hell, I had to carry the
bag the last 4 holes.

1024
01:06:35,708 --> 01:06:36,697
Look...

1025
01:06:36,942 --> 01:06:39,035
...I love old Earl, but...

1026
01:06:39,211 --> 01:06:40,542
...I need you.

1027
01:06:41,947 --> 01:06:43,209
You don't love me?

1028
01:06:44,750 --> 01:06:48,481
Well, yeah, yeah, I love
you too, goddamn it.

1029
01:06:48,988 --> 01:06:50,580
As much as Earl?

1030
01:06:51,257 --> 01:06:52,747
I don't know!

1031
01:06:53,092 --> 01:06:55,754
When I was with Earl,
I was thinking of you.

1032
01:06:59,598 --> 01:07:01,589
Yes, as much as Earl.

1033
01:07:01,834 --> 01:07:03,267
More than Earl.

1034
01:07:04,770 --> 01:07:06,431
More than Earl.

1035
01:07:07,773 --> 01:07:09,001
Am I special?

1036
01:07:12,445 --> 01:07:14,606
If you remove the sexual overtones...

1037
01:07:14,780 --> 01:07:17,340
...and add a golf theme, then, Romeo...

1038
01:07:17,516 --> 01:07:19,347
...I am your Juliet.

1039
01:07:23,122 --> 01:07:24,453
In that case...

1040
01:07:24,824 --> 01:07:26,155
...Julieta...

1041
01:07:26,926 --> 01:07:28,587
...I am your caddy.

1042
01:07:37,803 --> 01:07:39,600
Nobody's heard from Molly?

1043
01:07:39,772 --> 01:07:41,262
You got it bad?

1044
01:07:41,674 --> 01:07:43,608
Something about that chick.

1045
01:07:49,181 --> 01:07:51,115
Little chili-dipper there.

1046
01:07:51,283 --> 01:07:54,116
Be sure to do that in the
Open, it'll impress them.

1047
01:08:03,796 --> 01:08:04,956
I'm watching.

1048
01:08:05,131 --> 01:08:06,189
That ain't a chili-dipper.

1049
01:08:06,365 --> 01:08:09,960
Looks like you got el hosel.
You know, the laterals.

1050
01:08:10,136 --> 01:08:11,364
The "S" word.

1051
01:08:11,537 --> 01:08:12,799
What's wrong?

1052
01:08:12,972 --> 01:08:15,702
I don't know. The shanks are
like a virus. They just show up.

1053
01:08:15,875 --> 01:08:17,536
Nobody can figure them out.

1054
01:08:27,486 --> 01:08:29,215
Something's terribly wrong!

1055
01:08:29,555 --> 01:08:31,386
Something's wrong.

1056
01:08:31,557 --> 01:08:32,990
It's okay.

1057
01:08:33,325 --> 01:08:34,314
Well?

1058
01:08:34,827 --> 01:08:36,226
What's your guess?

1059
01:08:36,395 --> 01:08:38,226
It must be the woman.

1060
01:08:38,397 --> 01:08:39,659
You said a virus.

1061
01:08:39,832 --> 01:08:42,164
A woman can have the same effect.

1062
01:08:43,502 --> 01:08:45,333
What do I do?

1063
01:08:48,407 --> 01:08:50,238
Just keep swinging.

1064
01:08:50,409 --> 01:08:52,001
You'll be fine.

1065
01:09:00,853 --> 01:09:02,753
Don't say a fucking word.

1066
01:09:09,862 --> 01:09:11,693
I'll be inside if you need me.

1067
01:09:23,108 --> 01:09:24,769
Just work it out.

1068
01:09:58,978 --> 01:10:00,468
Hello?

1069
01:10:00,813 --> 01:10:02,405
Is anybody home?

1070
01:10:09,655 --> 01:10:10,644
My God!

1071
01:10:15,828 --> 01:10:17,989
Therapist laughs at the patient?

1072
01:10:18,831 --> 01:10:20,264
Is that how it works?

1073
01:10:20,766 --> 01:10:21,824
Is it?

1074
01:10:22,601 --> 01:10:26,002
A man's laid bare before God,
he's the butt of the cosmic joke.

1075
01:10:26,171 --> 01:10:27,331
I'm sorry.

1076
01:10:27,506 --> 01:10:28,438
Really.

1077
01:10:28,607 --> 01:10:31,599
Some of this shit might
actually work, you know.

1078
01:10:32,177 --> 01:10:34,168
There's something to this hat.

1079
01:10:34,513 --> 01:10:36,777
The golf ball pendulum thing.

1080
01:10:37,783 --> 01:10:39,011
May be onto something.

1081
01:10:39,184 --> 01:10:41,175
Oh, Jesus, Roy.

1082
01:10:41,520 --> 01:10:46,287
Quoting yourself, "It is a paraphernalia
for lost and desperate souls."

1083
01:10:47,793 --> 01:10:51,285
A lost and desperate
soul stands before you.

1084
01:10:52,131 --> 01:10:56,625
I assume I have the confidentiality
of the doctor/client...

1085
01:10:57,036 --> 01:10:58,970
...privilege in regard to this outfit?

1086
01:10:59,138 --> 01:11:00,196
Of course.

1087
01:11:00,472 --> 01:11:01,803
What happened?

1088
01:11:04,810 --> 01:11:06,368
I got the shanks.

1089
01:11:06,545 --> 01:11:07,978
Are you taking penicillin?

1090
01:11:08,147 --> 01:11:10,308
There's a glitch in my swing.

1091
01:11:10,482 --> 01:11:12,313
That's Romeo's department.

1092
01:11:12,484 --> 01:11:14,475
He thinks it's your department.

1093
01:11:14,987 --> 01:11:16,318
Says it's a head thing.

1094
01:11:18,057 --> 01:11:22,050
I just came over to congratulate
you on the sectionals and...

1095
01:11:22,227 --> 01:11:24,218
...to return your car.

1096
01:11:24,396 --> 01:11:26,159
David just wanted to make a point.

1097
01:11:27,166 --> 01:11:28,724
You know what?

1098
01:11:28,901 --> 01:11:33,838
I suppose we could have a therapy
session right here and now.

1099
01:11:35,341 --> 01:11:37,070
I don't want therapy.

1100
01:11:38,911 --> 01:11:40,503
I want you.

1101
01:11:45,250 --> 01:11:46,740
I want you.

1102
01:11:47,920 --> 01:11:49,854
I must get some air.

1103
01:11:52,591 --> 01:11:53,751
Molly, wait.

1104
01:11:55,361 --> 01:11:56,589
Look at me.

1105
01:12:00,199 --> 01:12:03,191
Well, not at the moment,
but just listen to me.

1106
01:12:07,539 --> 01:12:09,268
You're with the wrong guy.

1107
01:12:10,042 --> 01:12:11,600
I'm the right guy.

1108
01:12:14,279 --> 01:12:17,271
Everyone says my face is
screwed up tight as a drum.

1109
01:12:17,449 --> 01:12:21,215
I know it's because I've
been crazy about you...

1110
01:12:21,387 --> 01:12:24,220
...from the moment you came
here wearing this stupid shit.

1111
01:12:25,224 --> 01:12:29,718
The whole thing's inspired me to get
here and caused me to get the shanks...

1112
01:12:29,895 --> 01:12:33,888
...which would humiliate me in front
of a billion people in a game...

1113
01:12:34,233 --> 01:12:36,224
...I used to play pretty good.

1114
01:12:37,636 --> 01:12:39,399
Such is life.

1115
01:12:42,641 --> 01:12:46,907
So dump that phony bastard you're with
and come to the Open in my corner.

1116
01:12:47,980 --> 01:12:48,742
Tell me...

1117
01:12:49,581 --> 01:12:51,811
...you're not just at least...

1118
01:12:52,418 --> 01:12:54,249
...moderately attracted to me.

1119
01:12:55,320 --> 01:12:57,481
You have moments, Roy.

1120
01:12:57,656 --> 01:13:01,752
You tell me which ones are my
moments and I'll duplicate them.

1121
01:13:02,161 --> 01:13:03,594
This is a moment.

1122
01:13:03,762 --> 01:13:04,751
Now?

1123
01:13:05,330 --> 01:13:08,993
I mean, just utterly exposed,
completely vulnerable...

1124
01:13:09,435 --> 01:13:11,164
...inner child trying to get out.

1125
01:13:11,336 --> 01:13:13,827
Yeah? My inner child needs a spanking?

1126
01:13:23,015 --> 01:13:24,949
I don't have a car.

1127
01:13:25,350 --> 01:13:26,783
Need a ride.

1128
01:13:43,335 --> 01:13:47,328
I know a little spot along the
river that's great to watch sunsets.

1129
01:13:47,539 --> 01:13:48,870
- I do.
- Watch the road.

1130
01:13:49,041 --> 01:13:52,704
- I know a spot that's great for sunsets.
- I bet you do.

1131
01:13:53,045 --> 01:13:54,637
Not tonight.

1132
01:13:56,148 --> 01:13:58,378
That means maybe some other night.

1133
01:13:58,550 --> 01:14:00,142
I didn't mean it like that.

1134
01:14:00,319 --> 01:14:03,652
Maybe consciously you didn't mean
it that way, but unconsciously...

1135
01:14:04,490 --> 01:14:06,981
Did you mean it unconsciously?

1136
01:14:07,993 --> 01:14:11,724
Unconsciously, I don't have a
clue what I'm talking about.

1137
01:14:12,564 --> 01:14:14,657
I feel we're making progress.

1138
01:14:14,833 --> 01:14:15,993
I do too.

1139
01:14:16,335 --> 01:14:19,998
I have no idea what it's
progress towards, though.

1140
01:14:20,339 --> 01:14:22,830
Consciously or unconsciously?

1141
01:14:41,026 --> 01:14:44,359
It may not be much of a
river to you, but to me...

1142
01:14:45,264 --> 01:14:47,755
...the Mississippi, the Rio Grande...

1143
01:14:48,367 --> 01:14:50,096
...the Danube...

1144
01:14:50,369 --> 01:14:51,700
...the Amazon.

1145
01:14:51,870 --> 01:14:54,532
I don't know about the Amazon, Roy.

1146
01:14:57,709 --> 01:15:00,701
Isn't it obvious to you
that you and me are...

1147
01:15:00,879 --> 01:15:02,779
...as comfortable together as...

1148
01:15:02,948 --> 01:15:04,210
...a couple of old shoes?

1149
01:15:05,551 --> 01:15:07,109
Old shoes?

1150
01:15:11,890 --> 01:15:14,723
Look, David's a really good person.

1151
01:15:17,796 --> 01:15:21,129
Whenever anybody says they're
with a really good person...

1152
01:15:21,466 --> 01:15:24,060
...it means they're about to leave them.

1153
01:15:24,403 --> 01:15:26,564
You're awfully judgmental.

1154
01:15:31,643 --> 01:15:34,134
It's one of my few redeeming virtues.

1155
01:15:36,148 --> 01:15:38,582
David's involved in a
lot of charity work.

1156
01:15:38,750 --> 01:15:41,981
- Gets his name in the papers.
- Let me just finish.

1157
01:15:42,154 --> 01:15:44,588
Many people don't see he's sensitive.

1158
01:15:44,756 --> 01:15:46,747
Well, so am I. I mean, hell...

1159
01:15:46,925 --> 01:15:50,759
Shit, I'm twice as sensitive
as he is. I mean, I...

1160
01:15:51,430 --> 01:15:53,762
I brought you to the river.
That's a...

1161
01:15:53,932 --> 01:15:55,422
...nature kind of thing.

1162
01:15:56,935 --> 01:16:01,497
It is a nature kind of thing.
It's a very nice river. Thank you.

1163
01:16:02,441 --> 01:16:05,933
But that's not the point. The point
is David is there for me.

1164
01:16:06,111 --> 01:16:07,271
Oh, God.

1165
01:16:07,446 --> 01:16:08,845
Not the...

1166
01:16:09,014 --> 01:16:12,347
..."He's a very good person
and he's there for me" thing.

1167
01:16:12,618 --> 01:16:14,017
Let me be your shrink.

1168
01:16:14,186 --> 01:16:15,847
That's not a good idea.

1169
01:16:16,021 --> 01:16:18,615
You sound like a woman
looking for a way out.

1170
01:16:22,194 --> 01:16:23,456
Warm?

1171
01:16:25,530 --> 01:16:27,122
That's enough, Roy.

1172
01:16:30,702 --> 01:16:31,862
I'm sorry.

1173
01:16:46,985 --> 01:16:48,543
We could kiss.

1174
01:16:49,154 --> 01:16:51,987
No, look, no harm, no foul just a...

1175
01:16:52,391 --> 01:16:54,882
...little, small, innocent kind of...

1176
01:16:55,060 --> 01:16:56,220
...kind of...

1177
01:16:57,062 --> 01:16:58,552
...semi...

1178
01:16:59,231 --> 01:17:00,562
...platonic...

1179
01:17:04,836 --> 01:17:07,396
Roy, there's no such thing as...

1180
01:17:07,572 --> 01:17:09,733
...semi-platonic, Roy.

1181
01:17:11,576 --> 01:17:13,009
There ought to be.

1182
01:17:17,015 --> 01:17:19,006
You should take me home.

1183
01:17:46,778 --> 01:17:47,437
Well...

1184
01:17:48,714 --> 01:17:50,614
Good luck in the Open.

1185
01:19:48,166 --> 01:19:49,827
It's got your name on it.

1186
01:19:51,336 --> 01:19:53,736
It's Lee Janzen and Billy Mayfair.

1187
01:19:55,574 --> 01:19:57,508
They look just like they do on TV.

1188
01:19:57,676 --> 01:19:58,665
Look.

1189
01:20:01,680 --> 01:20:03,170
Look at these balls.

1190
01:20:03,582 --> 01:20:05,015
Brand-new Titleist.

1191
01:20:05,584 --> 01:20:06,676
Look at them.

1192
01:20:06,852 --> 01:20:09,082
Every one of them, brand-new Titleist.

1193
01:20:10,689 --> 01:20:12,748
Sneak a few in the bag.

1194
01:20:13,191 --> 01:20:17,093
We swipe enough free shit,
we may pay for this fiasco.

1195
01:20:17,929 --> 01:20:21,262
Would it be inappropriate if I asked
Lee Janzen for his autograph?

1196
01:20:21,433 --> 01:20:26,370
I think that's a dead giveaway, but if I
got the shanks, we'll be found out soon.

1197
01:20:28,206 --> 01:20:30,606
Hit the 7.
You always hit that good.

1198
01:20:31,042 --> 01:20:31,940
Good thinking.

1199
01:20:32,110 --> 01:20:33,441
Come on, man.

1200
01:20:35,881 --> 01:20:37,439
Keep your head down.

1201
01:20:37,716 --> 01:20:39,547
You're making me nervous.

1202
01:20:45,624 --> 01:20:47,285
- Who hit that shot?!
- Yeah, who hit it?

1203
01:20:47,459 --> 01:20:48,551
Anyone see?

1204
01:20:48,727 --> 01:20:50,058
You're supposed to be pros!

1205
01:20:51,229 --> 01:20:53,459
- A little thin.
- A little fucking thin.

1206
01:20:53,632 --> 01:20:55,122
I still got the shanks.

1207
01:20:55,300 --> 01:20:57,131
- Don't worry.
- Everyone's watching.

1208
01:20:57,302 --> 01:20:58,564
Nobody's watching.

1209
01:20:58,737 --> 01:21:01,467
Just hit them up. Just stand
up there. You can do it.

1210
01:21:15,987 --> 01:21:18,649
The guys down the line
are a little concerned.

1211
01:21:19,090 --> 01:21:20,079
You're Tin Cup?

1212
01:21:20,258 --> 01:21:23,421
Right, McAvoy from West Texas.
We're from West Texas.

1213
01:21:23,595 --> 01:21:24,653
Try aiming left.

1214
01:21:24,829 --> 01:21:27,593
Try backing up and giving
me just a little room.

1215
01:21:31,603 --> 01:21:32,831
That's Johnny Miller.

1216
01:21:33,004 --> 01:21:34,528
I don't give a fuck.

1217
01:21:34,873 --> 01:21:36,363
Jesus, Cup.

1218
01:21:36,708 --> 01:21:39,142
- Can I have your autograph.
- No problem. To who?

1219
01:21:40,211 --> 01:21:41,872
To Romeo, my best friend,

1220
01:21:42,981 --> 01:21:44,209
Good luck to you guys.

1221
01:21:44,549 --> 01:21:47,882
You might want to make plane
reservations soon, the way you're hitting.

1222
01:21:48,053 --> 01:21:50,317
Great Open in '73.

1223
01:21:50,488 --> 01:21:52,422
- What a nice guy.
- Did you get his autograph?

1224
01:21:52,490 --> 01:21:55,459
- Yeah, look... my best friend.
- See who's over there?

1225
01:21:55,827 --> 01:21:56,816
Jesus Christ.

1226
01:21:56,995 --> 01:21:58,986
It's only an autograph, man.

1227
01:21:59,331 --> 01:22:01,060
Simms is here.

1228
01:22:04,102 --> 01:22:05,660
Shit.

1229
01:22:05,837 --> 01:22:07,896
Hit your putter, you can't shank.

1230
01:22:07,973 --> 01:22:11,340
You're the Mexican Mac O'Grady.
Figure out why I'm shanking.

1231
01:22:11,743 --> 01:22:13,677
- Now what?
- Shoot.

1232
01:22:13,845 --> 01:22:15,836
I'm catching it on the hosel?

1233
01:22:16,448 --> 01:22:17,938
Moving my head?

1234
01:22:18,249 --> 01:22:20,240
- I'm laying it off?
- That, too.

1235
01:22:20,452 --> 01:22:21,510
I'm pronating.

1236
01:22:21,686 --> 01:22:25,349
- When you're not supinating.
- I'm clearing too early, too late.

1237
01:22:25,523 --> 01:22:27,855
My swing feels like an unfolding chair!

1238
01:22:31,363 --> 01:22:33,354
Put your change in your left pocket.

1239
01:22:34,132 --> 01:22:35,622
Go on, do it.

1240
01:22:39,971 --> 01:22:43,031
Now, tie your left
shoe in a double knot.

1241
01:22:43,208 --> 01:22:45,699
- Tie my left shoe?
- Right now, do it!

1242
01:22:52,717 --> 01:22:54,150
Turn the hat backwards.

1243
01:22:54,419 --> 01:22:56,751
Turn your hat around.
Do it, Roy!

1244
01:23:01,159 --> 01:23:02,387
Take this tee...

1245
01:23:02,560 --> 01:23:03,891
...and stick it...

1246
01:23:04,496 --> 01:23:05,793
...behind your left ear.

1247
01:23:08,299 --> 01:23:09,891
I look like a fool!

1248
01:23:10,068 --> 01:23:14,061
What do you think you look like
shooting chili peppers up Janzen's ass?

1249
01:23:16,007 --> 01:23:18,305
Do it now or I'm going to quit.

1250
01:23:18,510 --> 01:23:20,501
I swear to God I'll quit.

1251
01:23:21,913 --> 01:23:23,073
Good.

1252
01:23:23,248 --> 01:23:24,237
Take this ball...

1253
01:23:24,416 --> 01:23:26,407
...and hit it up the fairway.

1254
01:23:26,584 --> 01:23:27,744
You're ready.

1255
01:23:42,434 --> 01:23:43,696
How'd I do that?

1256
01:23:43,835 --> 01:23:47,771
Because you're not thinking
about shanking or Molly.

1257
01:23:47,939 --> 01:23:49,201
You're not thinking.

1258
01:23:49,340 --> 01:23:52,332
You're looking like a fool,
hitting the ball pure and simple...

1259
01:23:52,544 --> 01:23:53,272
Fuck you.

1260
01:23:53,445 --> 01:23:56,107
Fuck me, huh? Well, you're cured.

1261
01:23:58,349 --> 01:23:59,611
That's it?

1262
01:24:00,351 --> 01:24:01,613
That's it.

1263
01:24:01,786 --> 01:24:03,947
Your brain was getting in the way.

1264
01:24:05,557 --> 01:24:07,718
That's hardly ever been the case.

1265
01:24:07,859 --> 01:24:09,224
No shit, Sherlock.

1266
01:24:09,360 --> 01:24:10,622
What next?

1267
01:24:12,731 --> 01:24:15,222
You should work on
your short game but...

1268
01:24:15,967 --> 01:24:17,229
...get drunk.

1269
01:24:17,368 --> 01:24:18,801
Get drunk?

1270
01:24:19,471 --> 01:24:21,063
You play better.

1271
01:24:23,241 --> 01:24:24,799
Remember Brownsville?

1272
01:24:26,978 --> 01:24:27,740
Come on.

1273
01:24:27,879 --> 01:24:29,073
When do I tee off?

1274
01:24:29,247 --> 01:24:31,738
At 7:08. We're the first guys going.

1275
01:24:31,883 --> 01:24:34,147
Come on, one more, just do it.

1276
01:24:34,319 --> 01:24:35,149
Come on.

1277
01:24:35,320 --> 01:24:37,254
- Get it down.
- That's in 4 hours.

1278
01:24:37,388 --> 01:24:38,082
Right.

1279
01:24:41,826 --> 01:24:45,762
Here's to the finely-tuned
athlete on the verge of greatness.

1280
01:25:02,981 --> 01:25:04,471
Should have set an alarm.

1281
01:25:06,785 --> 01:25:08,412
The 7:08 pairing...

1282
01:25:08,620 --> 01:25:11,680
...from Salami, Texas, Mr. Roy McAvoy.

1283
01:25:12,924 --> 01:25:14,789
Any time for a quick bucket?

1284
01:25:14,926 --> 01:25:15,915
Tee it up.

1285
01:25:18,129 --> 01:25:21,189
We almost missed the starting
time getting you off the floor.

1286
01:25:21,366 --> 01:25:24,301
You don't handle hooch like you used to.

1287
01:25:25,436 --> 01:25:29,304
I've seen this hole on TV.
Hit the big dog up the chute.

1288
01:25:29,440 --> 01:25:33,308
I've learned my lesson.
I'll play it safe, smart...

1289
01:25:33,878 --> 01:25:35,311
...conservative.

1290
01:25:36,147 --> 01:25:38,547
Fairways and greens. Hand me a 2-iron.

1291
01:25:38,950 --> 01:25:39,882
You sure?

1292
01:25:44,656 --> 01:25:46,055
Here we go.

1293
01:25:53,231 --> 01:25:54,892
Not a good day.

1294
01:25:55,733 --> 01:25:57,166
Be humble.

1295
01:26:04,175 --> 01:26:05,403
Be humble.

1296
01:26:05,577 --> 01:26:06,566
83.

1297
01:26:06,911 --> 01:26:08,572
You're humble now, homes.

1298
01:26:08,980 --> 01:26:10,675
I was hungover.

1299
01:26:11,883 --> 01:26:13,851
Maybe that was a coaching mistake.

1300
01:26:13,985 --> 01:26:16,852
Yeah, maybe it was.
Thanks, amigo.

1301
01:26:17,422 --> 01:26:18,855
David Simms...

1302
01:26:18,990 --> 01:26:23,484
...is the first-round leader at the
U.S. Open after a brilliant 67.

1303
01:26:24,195 --> 01:26:26,356
Well, Jim, I must tell you...

1304
01:26:26,497 --> 01:26:30,866
...I didn't expect to go out
there right out and shoot a 67.

1305
01:26:33,605 --> 01:26:37,200
I've marveled at how you've been
able to balance superb play...

1306
01:26:37,375 --> 01:26:39,275
...with the energy you give...

1307
01:26:39,444 --> 01:26:42,106
...to so many charities
and all of your fans.

1308
01:26:42,280 --> 01:26:45,613
Well, you know I...
This game is about...

1309
01:26:45,783 --> 01:26:48,274
...tradition and integrity and honor.

1310
01:26:48,519 --> 01:26:51,454
You know, the U.S. Open is it for us.

1311
01:26:51,623 --> 01:26:55,389
So I'm going to go out tomorrow
and try to make some good swings.

1312
01:26:55,526 --> 01:26:56,788
Lord willing...

1313
01:26:57,128 --> 01:26:58,527
...I'll do well and...

1314
01:26:58,730 --> 01:27:01,130
The Anti-Christ shoots 67.

1315
01:27:01,733 --> 01:27:02,893
Believe that?

1316
01:27:03,034 --> 01:27:06,401
Yeah, the old Antichrist
had a hot putter today.

1317
01:27:06,971 --> 01:27:08,302
Good seeing you.

1318
01:27:10,141 --> 01:27:12,905
Be well, buddy. I'll see
you out in the trenches.

1319
01:27:13,912 --> 01:27:15,641
I must run right now...

1320
01:27:15,813 --> 01:27:17,474
...but I'll see you later.

1321
01:27:18,049 --> 01:27:20,415
Christ Almighty Jesus.

1322
01:27:21,552 --> 01:27:23,315
The cover or nothing.

1323
01:27:23,488 --> 01:27:26,821
They want you for USA Weekend.
We're saying it's the cover or no go.

1324
01:27:29,060 --> 01:27:30,755
Excuse me, Mr. Simms.

1325
01:27:30,929 --> 01:27:33,420
Would you give our
grandson an autograph?

1326
01:27:33,564 --> 01:27:34,929
Please, Mr. Simms?

1327
01:27:35,066 --> 01:27:38,058
Can you people not see that
I'm busy? I'm working.

1328
01:27:38,336 --> 01:27:39,769
This is my office.

1329
01:27:39,938 --> 01:27:42,566
Do I come to your office
and ask for an autograph?

1330
01:27:42,774 --> 01:27:44,071
I don't think so.

1331
01:27:44,275 --> 01:27:45,503
Jesus.

1332
01:27:45,677 --> 01:27:47,076
What an ugly dog.

1333
01:27:48,079 --> 01:27:49,944
It's okay, Joe.

1334
01:28:03,594 --> 01:28:05,289
- Nice playing.
- Hell of a round.

1335
01:28:05,530 --> 01:28:06,690
Great start.

1336
01:28:06,864 --> 01:28:08,695
I got lucky out there.

1337
01:28:11,536 --> 01:28:12,798
Hello, Cup.

1338
01:28:14,472 --> 01:28:18,033
I heard you put a monster
number up there.

1339
01:28:18,209 --> 01:28:20,200
It could have been worse.

1340
01:28:21,045 --> 01:28:25,379
I played in the Pro-Am with some
asshole movie star here once.

1341
01:28:26,718 --> 01:28:28,481
Shot an 82.

1342
01:28:29,220 --> 01:28:31,211
Now, how in the world...

1343
01:28:31,389 --> 01:28:34,324
...can a great ball-striker like you...

1344
01:28:34,625 --> 01:28:35,819
...a legend...

1345
01:28:37,495 --> 01:28:39,725
...manage to put up an 83?

1346
01:28:40,331 --> 01:28:43,129
Well, I missed a 4-foot putt on 18...

1347
01:28:43,334 --> 01:28:44,733
...for an 82.

1348
01:28:45,336 --> 01:28:46,633
That's how.

1349
01:28:47,071 --> 01:28:51,235
Ain't like playing some muni-track
in Brownsville, is it?

1350
01:28:52,143 --> 01:28:55,010
Does "integrity, tradition and honor"...

1351
01:28:55,413 --> 01:28:57,643
...include kicking a man when he's down?

1352
01:29:00,752 --> 01:29:02,743
This is just guy stuff.

1353
01:29:03,755 --> 01:29:05,154
It's just bar talk.

1354
01:29:05,356 --> 01:29:06,084
No offense?

1355
01:29:06,591 --> 01:29:09,424
This man still has a lot of
great golf shots in his system.

1356
01:29:09,594 --> 01:29:11,084
It's okay. Go away.

1357
01:29:11,262 --> 01:29:14,254
Just... I don't need any
attention right now.

1358
01:29:14,532 --> 01:29:18,024
I'll bet you $100 that
Roy can hit a ball...

1359
01:29:18,169 --> 01:29:20,865
...through the door, over
the patio into the river.

1360
01:29:21,039 --> 01:29:23,940
And, Harold, give me a
vodka tonic with a twist.

1361
01:29:25,610 --> 01:29:27,771
Really, this isn't dignified.

1362
01:29:28,880 --> 01:29:30,939
Oh, I am so sorry.

1363
01:29:32,283 --> 01:29:33,875
I just want to go home.

1364
01:29:34,786 --> 01:29:36,276
What about the river?

1365
01:29:36,888 --> 01:29:40,051
The piranha, the immortality,
all that bullshit?

1366
01:29:40,625 --> 01:29:43,389
You going to drag your
ass home with an 83?

1367
01:29:46,464 --> 01:29:47,954
$200.

1368
01:29:48,466 --> 01:29:49,558
For $200...

1369
01:29:50,301 --> 01:29:55,136
...Roy can hit the ball through the bar,
out the patio, into the river...

1370
01:29:55,306 --> 01:29:58,707
...and make that pelican
right there fly off its post.

1371
01:29:59,077 --> 01:30:00,567
From right here.

1372
01:30:04,415 --> 01:30:05,473
God Almighty.

1373
01:30:05,650 --> 01:30:07,311
This is ridiculous.

1374
01:30:11,222 --> 01:30:13,417
You got the shot, pods.

1375
01:30:13,925 --> 01:30:15,654
Romeo, shut up.

1376
01:30:16,094 --> 01:30:19,655
Just turn it over and start it
off low and go it right to left...

1377
01:30:19,831 --> 01:30:20,923
He can do it.

1378
01:30:21,099 --> 01:30:25,729
You can do it. And I'm not leaving till
one of you men act in a manly fashion.

1379
01:30:25,937 --> 01:30:27,837
Can we get this over with?

1380
01:30:35,446 --> 01:30:36,674
One ball...

1381
01:30:36,848 --> 01:30:38,440
...one swing...

1382
01:30:40,251 --> 01:30:41,013
...one...

1383
01:30:42,019 --> 01:30:43,247
...pelican.

1384
01:30:44,122 --> 01:30:45,111
From there.

1385
01:30:46,124 --> 01:30:47,250
You can do it.

1386
01:30:47,458 --> 01:30:49,756
You're the man. Shut him up.

1387
01:30:59,971 --> 01:31:01,370
One swing?

1388
01:31:01,539 --> 01:31:02,870
One swing.

1389
01:31:03,040 --> 01:31:03,972
4 to 1.

1390
01:31:04,142 --> 01:31:05,632
Give him 10-1.

1391
01:31:08,379 --> 01:31:09,971
I'll need a fairway.

1392
01:31:10,148 --> 01:31:11,638
Here's what he's got.

1393
01:31:11,782 --> 01:31:16,481
30 yards of bar and grill, then must go
through the doors, over umbrellas...

1394
01:31:16,654 --> 01:31:18,485
...then carry 30 yards of river.

1395
01:31:18,656 --> 01:31:20,886
He must pop that pelican off its perch.

1396
01:31:21,058 --> 01:31:22,889
Kind of a thin line.

1397
01:31:23,060 --> 01:31:26,154
Beats that deep shit
rough you were in all day.

1398
01:31:27,365 --> 01:31:28,696
Pelican's on the other side.

1399
01:31:29,167 --> 01:31:31,158
What a tough shot.

1400
01:31:31,402 --> 01:31:35,998
He's just got to be thinking of that
brutal, ego-sapping, manhood-robbing...

1401
01:31:36,174 --> 01:31:38,665
...83 he buried himself under today.

1402
01:31:38,809 --> 01:31:40,401
That's an avalanche of strokes.

1403
01:31:41,245 --> 01:31:42,803
Get control of that guy.

1404
01:31:43,014 --> 01:31:45,073
Will you shut up? Get down.

1405
01:31:58,596 --> 01:32:00,257
Did you see that shot?!

1406
01:32:00,531 --> 01:32:02,192
Oh, my God!

1407
01:32:07,438 --> 01:32:08,928
That should cover it.

1408
01:32:10,775 --> 01:32:11,707
You know...

1409
01:32:12,944 --> 01:32:14,935
...you're all fucking nuts.

1410
01:32:24,855 --> 01:32:28,347
You really look good.

1411
01:32:30,795 --> 01:32:31,887
Oh, God.

1412
01:33:01,659 --> 01:33:03,092
Oh, my God.

1413
01:33:03,494 --> 01:33:05,485
I kind of shanked that.

1414
01:33:07,832 --> 01:33:08,764
Come on!

1415
01:33:09,000 --> 01:33:10,160
Shit.

1416
01:33:10,901 --> 01:33:12,163
God.

1417
01:33:12,903 --> 01:33:14,894
Shit, man.

1418
01:33:15,273 --> 01:33:17,002
Tempo's everything.

1419
01:33:20,111 --> 01:33:21,271
Perfection is...

1420
01:33:21,412 --> 01:33:22,902
...unattainable.

1421
01:33:25,283 --> 01:33:27,274
You know, someone said...

1422
01:33:27,418 --> 01:33:31,684
...golf and sex are the only things
you don't have to be good at to enjoy.

1423
01:33:34,925 --> 01:33:36,290
Can I have a Mulligan?

1424
01:33:36,427 --> 01:33:38,292
- A what?
- Mulligan.

1425
01:33:38,429 --> 01:33:39,862
What's a Mulligan?

1426
01:33:41,699 --> 01:33:43,360
Just hold still...

1427
01:33:43,534 --> 01:33:44,796
...don't move...

1428
01:33:44,935 --> 01:33:46,425
...and I'll show you.

1429
01:33:46,804 --> 01:33:49,932
In fact, wait a minute,
get on top. I'll show you.

1430
01:33:50,141 --> 01:33:51,369
I'll tee it up.

1431
01:33:52,810 --> 01:33:54,801
Come on, Roy.

1432
01:34:15,166 --> 01:34:17,657
Welcome everyone,
Jim Nantz with Ken Venturi.

1433
01:34:17,835 --> 01:34:19,666
The sun's struggling to appear.

1434
01:34:19,837 --> 01:34:22,499
The course is drying up.
In case you're just joining us...

1435
01:34:22,673 --> 01:34:27,076
...David Simms is tied for the lead
at 5 under par with Peter Jacobsen.

1436
01:34:27,244 --> 01:34:31,340
But the real story today
involves a driving range pro...

1437
01:34:31,582 --> 01:34:34,745
...who shot an opening
round 83 yesterday...

1438
01:34:35,086 --> 01:34:37,748
...but is now making U.S. Open history.

1439
01:34:37,922 --> 01:34:41,756
The single round record in Open history
is in jeopardy because of McAvoy.

1440
01:34:41,826 --> 01:34:45,728
Another driving range pro,
it's all we needed.

1441
01:34:45,863 --> 01:34:49,697
It's heroes that I need.
Not obscure driving range pros.

1442
01:34:49,867 --> 01:34:51,858
Okay, Ben, back at 16.

1443
01:34:53,204 --> 01:34:57,607
This putt he's studied from every
angle and I'm sure he knows...

1444
01:34:57,775 --> 01:35:00,869
...it's got to be firm on the
left-hand edge with this putt.

1445
01:35:01,011 --> 01:35:04,606
Get thumbnails on these guys.
I don't know where he's from...

1446
01:35:04,782 --> 01:35:08,218
...but here he is, going
ten under, if he makes it.

1447
01:35:11,288 --> 01:35:13,518
Look at that. Smooth as silk.

1448
01:35:13,724 --> 01:35:15,214
He's made it!

1449
01:35:15,626 --> 01:35:18,390
10 under par for McAvoy!

1450
01:35:18,729 --> 01:35:20,390
Man alive!

1451
01:35:20,531 --> 01:35:24,023
This is the stuff
of legend, I would say.

1452
01:35:27,238 --> 01:35:28,637
Who is McAvoy?

1453
01:35:29,807 --> 01:35:32,037
You ever hear of this McAvoy guy?

1454
01:35:32,476 --> 01:35:36,640
Roy McAvoy, after a par at 17.
An eagle to shoot 60...

1455
01:35:37,148 --> 01:35:40,481
...although no one has knocked it
onto the green in 2 here today.

1456
01:35:40,651 --> 01:35:42,642
It's not a shot you want
to be aggressive with.

1457
01:35:42,753 --> 01:35:44,744
You gotta be conservative,
you gotta think to shot out.

1458
01:35:44,822 --> 01:35:45,754
He's in great position.

1459
01:35:46,157 --> 01:35:48,148
It's a 3 shot par 5.

1460
01:35:48,325 --> 01:35:51,055
Especially today, a
little wind in the face.

1461
01:35:51,262 --> 01:35:54,561
John Daly ended up in the water
going for this green in two.

1462
01:35:54,765 --> 01:35:57,256
237, man, to carry that water.

1463
01:36:02,006 --> 01:36:03,496
237, man.

1464
01:36:11,348 --> 01:36:12,576
3-wood.

1465
01:36:20,191 --> 01:36:21,021
Hit hard.

1466
01:36:21,192 --> 01:36:25,356
Jimmy, if he lays up, he
takes the bogey out of play.

1467
01:36:25,529 --> 01:36:28,692
He goes for the green,
he brings 6 in, he brings 7 in.

1468
01:36:28,866 --> 01:36:30,959
He must remember he's in contention.

1469
01:36:31,235 --> 01:36:33,829
He has a chance to win.
He must play smart.

1470
01:36:45,716 --> 01:36:47,547
He didn't have enough club.

1471
01:36:48,986 --> 01:36:50,476
Well, what the hell?

1472
01:36:50,621 --> 01:36:52,714
You ride her until she bucks you...

1473
01:36:53,057 --> 01:36:54,547
...or don't ride at all.

1474
01:36:54,725 --> 01:36:57,626
If he can still knock a
wedge close and make par...

1475
01:36:57,995 --> 01:37:02,227
...it'd be one of the most
remarkable turn-arounds in history.

1476
01:37:02,399 --> 01:37:06,392
He's got 85 yards from here and the
drop zone is short of the water.

1477
01:37:06,570 --> 01:37:10,734
He'll need to get it on the upper
level of the multi-terraced green.

1478
01:37:15,412 --> 01:37:20,349
That's a good solid shot leaving
him about 12 feet away for par.

1479
01:37:20,518 --> 01:37:22,349
A par and 62...

1480
01:37:22,586 --> 01:37:25,521
...the all-time Open round record.

1481
01:37:37,368 --> 01:37:38,266
Good stroke.

1482
01:37:38,435 --> 01:37:39,367
He's got it.

1483
01:37:39,870 --> 01:37:40,859
Unbelievable.

1484
01:37:41,038 --> 01:37:43,029
McAvoy has done it.

1485
01:37:43,274 --> 01:37:47,267
You just saw the greatest round
in U.S. Open history.

1486
01:37:47,444 --> 01:37:49,036
62.

1487
01:37:49,880 --> 01:37:54,442
The all-time lowest round in a major
doesn't belong to a Jack Nicklaus...

1488
01:37:54,685 --> 01:37:56,550
...or an Arnold Palmer...

1489
01:37:56,687 --> 01:37:58,279
...Hogan or Sneed.

1490
01:37:58,455 --> 01:38:01,117
It's been shot by the
most improbable artist.

1491
01:38:01,292 --> 01:38:03,556
Roy McAvoy has his signature...

1492
01:38:03,694 --> 01:38:06,424
...on golf's all-time
masterpiece round.

1493
01:38:14,138 --> 01:38:18,905
I've got money from the bet.
Let's go somewhere fancy and celebrate.

1494
01:38:19,209 --> 01:38:22,906
There's nothing to celebrate.
Besides, these are my people.

1495
01:38:23,714 --> 01:38:27,309
I'm a Waffle House guy.
Got to stay in touch with that.

1496
01:38:27,585 --> 01:38:29,485
Plus, he needs his carbohydrates.

1497
01:38:29,653 --> 01:38:33,419
Plus, if the boys in Salome
were in town, they'd come here.

1498
01:38:35,159 --> 01:38:36,217
The legend!

1499
01:38:36,493 --> 01:38:38,825
We've been on a bus 2 days.

1500
01:38:42,333 --> 01:38:43,561
It's so good to see you.

1501
01:38:44,168 --> 01:38:45,931
Sweet 62!

1502
01:38:46,437 --> 01:38:48,337
Put the tables together.

1503
01:38:51,609 --> 01:38:53,236
Does this feel like home?

1504
01:38:53,510 --> 01:38:56,502
We just want you to know we
are with you all the way.

1505
01:38:56,680 --> 01:38:58,944
Doreen, meet Dr. Griswold.

1506
01:38:59,750 --> 01:39:00,944
This is Molly.

1507
01:39:02,119 --> 01:39:02,949
She's my shrink.

1508
01:39:03,454 --> 01:39:05,183
Well, ex-shrink.

1509
01:39:05,356 --> 01:39:07,847
We're sleeping together, so I can't be.

1510
01:39:08,459 --> 01:39:09,858
Knew it. Thanks.

1511
01:39:10,027 --> 01:39:11,187
Knew what?

1512
01:39:11,362 --> 01:39:12,454
Nothing.

1513
01:39:12,630 --> 01:39:13,619
Good luck.

1514
01:39:14,365 --> 01:39:17,528
You know what? I've got
a little extra cash...

1515
01:39:17,701 --> 01:39:21,137
...why don't we go somewhere
a little fancy and celebrate?

1516
01:39:21,271 --> 01:39:22,135
Why?

1517
01:39:22,773 --> 01:39:24,035
In honor of...

1518
01:39:24,208 --> 01:39:25,140
It's the Waffle House.

1519
01:39:25,275 --> 01:39:26,537
I know.

1520
01:39:26,710 --> 01:39:30,146
I've been dreaming about
waffles for 1,800 miles.

1521
01:39:30,280 --> 01:39:31,645
Me too.

1522
01:39:31,782 --> 01:39:34,774
There's a Waffle House like
this in Odessa, Texas.

1523
01:39:35,786 --> 01:39:36,650
No, Midlands.

1524
01:39:36,787 --> 01:39:38,049
It's in Odessa.

1525
01:39:38,222 --> 01:39:41,555
It's in Odessa. I'm from Odessa.
I was born there.

1526
01:39:41,725 --> 01:39:43,158
That's where it is.

1527
01:39:43,293 --> 01:39:44,487
The man.

1528
01:39:44,662 --> 01:39:45,720
To the Cup!

1529
01:39:45,896 --> 01:39:46,726
Cup Man!

1530
01:39:46,897 --> 01:39:48,296
You didn't have to do that.

1531
01:39:49,566 --> 01:39:51,500
You look lovely tonight.

1532
01:39:52,069 --> 01:39:53,400
Thank you.

1533
01:39:55,072 --> 01:39:58,064
I don't know if anyone told you,
but you're a great dancer.

1534
01:39:59,176 --> 01:40:00,302
Really?

1535
01:40:00,911 --> 01:40:04,244
But they had one there.
That's all I'm saying.

1536
01:40:04,415 --> 01:40:06,007
It was Odessa.

1537
01:40:06,183 --> 01:40:09,016
That's not what I was talking about,
you know where we stopped.

1538
01:40:09,186 --> 01:40:11,313
There's an easy way to figure this out.

1539
01:40:11,522 --> 01:40:13,012
You ever tango?

1540
01:40:14,692 --> 01:40:16,182
No.

1541
01:40:16,927 --> 01:40:18,087
Do you?

1542
01:40:21,532 --> 01:40:23,523
Romeo, you dance?

1543
01:40:24,334 --> 01:40:26,097
It doesn't matter!

1544
01:40:27,204 --> 01:40:29,331
It doesn't get much better than this.

1545
01:40:33,844 --> 01:40:38,713
This extraordinary Roy McAvoy,
he just won't go away.

1546
01:40:38,882 --> 01:40:43,114
This humble pro from Salome,
wherever that is.

1547
01:40:43,287 --> 01:40:45,847
- Little town, west Texas.
- It hasn't been discovered yet.

1548
01:40:46,056 --> 01:40:48,047
Over to 18, guys, quickly.

1549
01:40:48,225 --> 01:40:50,125
John Cook at the par 518th.

1550
01:40:50,294 --> 01:40:54,458
No stranger to championship play.
And he's going to lay up.

1551
01:40:55,799 --> 01:40:58,290
Meanwhile, here's Roy McAvoy.

1552
01:40:58,469 --> 01:41:01,233
He has the same shot he knocked
in the water yesterday.

1553
01:41:01,371 --> 01:41:04,238
The thing to do is tune out the
gallery saying "go for it."

1554
01:41:04,374 --> 01:41:07,810
He's back in contention, but he
must continue to play smart.

1555
01:41:08,078 --> 01:41:09,477
Give me a 3-wood.

1556
01:41:14,485 --> 01:41:18,751
He's pulled the 3-wood and he continues
to play without an ounce of fear.

1557
01:41:18,889 --> 01:41:20,948
That is just inexperience,
just pure and simple.

1558
01:41:21,391 --> 01:41:24,758
This is for Venturi up in the
booth thinking I should lay up.

1559
01:41:25,262 --> 01:41:29,255
What does he know? He only won this
tournament before you were born.

1560
01:41:34,905 --> 01:41:39,842
Caught it a little bit high, a breeze
in his face. That's got to go.

1561
01:41:40,477 --> 01:41:43,241
- He's done it again.
- No, not again.

1562
01:41:43,514 --> 01:41:46,608
He has found the water for
the third straight day.

1563
01:41:46,784 --> 01:41:48,513
What was he thinking about?

1564
01:41:48,685 --> 01:41:50,118
Give me another ball.

1565
01:41:52,422 --> 01:41:53,116
What?

1566
01:41:53,357 --> 01:41:54,688
It's a water hazard.

1567
01:41:55,025 --> 01:41:59,018
You go up there and take a drop.
Try to save par, like yesterday.

1568
01:41:59,863 --> 01:42:01,023
You're right.

1569
01:42:01,799 --> 01:42:03,528
What the hell was I thinking?

1570
01:42:04,368 --> 01:42:05,699
He's tied for the lead...

1571
01:42:05,869 --> 01:42:08,633
...this Roy McAvoy, this "Tin Cup"
this empty cup...

1572
01:42:08,806 --> 01:42:10,797
...this air-brain out of nowhere.

1573
01:42:10,941 --> 01:42:12,203
West Texas.

1574
01:42:12,376 --> 01:42:14,367
Thank you for West Texas.

1575
01:42:14,545 --> 01:42:19,039
You went for the green on 18 today.
Do you think that cost you?

1576
01:42:19,216 --> 01:42:21,047
I saved par, didn't I?

1577
01:42:21,952 --> 01:42:22,976
Didn't I?

1578
01:42:23,053 --> 01:42:27,422
You had the same shot yesterday
on 18 without a headwind.

1579
01:42:27,491 --> 01:42:29,118
You don't think I can?

1580
01:42:29,193 --> 01:42:30,182
It's unlikely.

1581
01:42:31,361 --> 01:42:33,852
So am I. Look at me, all right?

1582
01:42:33,931 --> 01:42:37,799
Look what I'm wearing. I'm playing
for Rio Grande Short-Haul Trucking.

1583
01:42:37,868 --> 01:42:39,802
Brink's and Brown's Sanitation.

1584
01:42:41,238 --> 01:42:45,299
First State Bank of Salome.
Woody's Smokehouse.

1585
01:42:46,410 --> 01:42:50,141
You think a guy like me bothers
to worry about the percentages?

1586
01:43:11,902 --> 01:43:14,837
Are you nervous about tomorrow, Roy?

1587
01:43:21,912 --> 01:43:24,346
It won't always be like this, you know.

1588
01:43:24,615 --> 01:43:25,775
What?

1589
01:43:27,017 --> 01:43:29,850
With me, surrounded by
all these guys snoring.

1590
01:43:30,020 --> 01:43:33,251
Stripper ex-girlfriend
laying across from us.

1591
01:43:35,259 --> 01:43:37,750
My caddie sleeping next to her.

1592
01:43:39,196 --> 01:43:41,528
It won't always be like this.

1593
01:43:41,932 --> 01:43:43,923
Yes, it will, Roy.

1594
01:43:44,635 --> 01:43:46,034
It will.

1595
01:44:11,295 --> 01:44:12,728
Dollar bills.

1596
01:44:20,370 --> 01:44:21,769
Dollar bills.

1597
01:44:29,446 --> 01:44:30,970
Dollar bills.

1598
01:44:43,660 --> 01:44:47,426
First up in the final pairing,
from Salome, Texas...

1599
01:44:47,597 --> 01:44:49,758
...Roy McAvoy.

1600
01:44:50,334 --> 01:44:53,132
Fairways and greens, and
don't forget to wave...

1601
01:44:53,337 --> 01:44:54,429
...as I blow by.

1602
01:44:54,771 --> 01:44:57,831
You mean blow up, don't you,
sport? You always do.

1603
01:45:29,906 --> 01:45:33,842
Playing out of Houston, Texas...
...David Simms.

1604
01:45:38,648 --> 01:45:42,482
It's okay, exactly where you are.
You're in great shape.

1605
01:46:00,270 --> 01:46:01,601
How's the lie?

1606
01:46:01,772 --> 01:46:03,763
Shit, it's buried.

1607
01:46:05,776 --> 01:46:07,175
Don't touch it.

1608
01:46:07,377 --> 01:46:08,708
I know the rules.

1609
01:46:13,150 --> 01:46:14,515
What'll you do?

1610
01:46:14,684 --> 01:46:16,049
Go right through there.

1611
01:46:16,353 --> 01:46:17,149
Go for it.

1612
01:46:21,558 --> 01:46:23,492
- Oh, God!
- Don't worry about it.

1613
01:46:23,627 --> 01:46:27,085
It was my fault. I gave you
the wrong club. You'll be fine.

1614
01:46:27,297 --> 01:46:30,198
Don't worry. You did fine.
Give me the club.

1615
01:46:30,600 --> 01:46:34,593
We've just heard Roy McAvoy has
taken a disastrous double-bogey...

1616
01:46:34,771 --> 01:46:36,762
...to open his final round here.

1617
01:46:36,940 --> 01:46:38,430
Trouble back there.

1618
01:46:39,543 --> 01:46:41,238
Just keep making pars.

1619
01:46:41,445 --> 01:46:43,879
I'll take 18 of them, all day.

1620
01:46:44,014 --> 01:46:45,948
Do it, and I'll own you.

1621
01:47:14,277 --> 01:47:15,266
Fore!

1622
01:47:20,283 --> 01:47:22,410
Roy McAvoy's second shot...

1623
01:47:22,586 --> 01:47:26,113
...at the second hole has
gone deep into the woods.

1624
01:47:26,289 --> 01:47:29,224
For a report on his plight,
let's go to Gary McCord...

1625
01:47:29,826 --> 01:47:33,990
...who has spent most of his life
in the woods and in darkness.

1626
01:47:34,131 --> 01:47:35,996
He's in jail here.

1627
01:47:36,133 --> 01:47:37,430
No chance for parole.

1628
01:47:37,601 --> 01:47:42,231
He's got to hit the ball back in the
fairway, pitch the ball on the green...

1629
01:47:42,439 --> 01:47:43,770
...and get up and down for par.

1630
01:47:43,940 --> 01:47:45,771
No chance to hit it on the green.

1631
01:47:47,144 --> 01:47:49,135
$50 says I knock it on with a 7-iron.

1632
01:47:49,613 --> 01:47:50,773
On the green?

1633
01:47:50,947 --> 01:47:51,606
Right.

1634
01:47:52,015 --> 01:47:53,073
You got it.

1635
01:47:53,783 --> 01:47:56,684
Move these people back right here.
I'm going right there.

1636
01:48:00,257 --> 01:48:01,622
What's he got?

1637
01:48:01,858 --> 01:48:02,847
What's he doing?

1638
01:48:04,327 --> 01:48:08,161
He's going to try to ricochet off
the toilet with a hooded 7-iron.

1639
01:48:08,532 --> 01:48:10,261
He's hitting off the shitter.

1640
01:48:10,467 --> 01:48:12,697
I can't believe he's doing this.

1641
01:48:12,869 --> 01:48:14,461
DVT 1, record.

1642
01:48:14,638 --> 01:48:15,730
Record this.

1643
01:48:25,982 --> 01:48:30,646
Roy McAvoy has banked his third
shot at the second hole...

1644
01:48:30,820 --> 01:48:35,723
...between the trees, off a water closet,
or loo, as you might call it...

1645
01:48:35,892 --> 01:48:38,656
...and got it on the green,
somehow, in three.

1646
01:48:38,895 --> 01:48:42,296
May be the shot that gets
him back on track here.

1647
01:48:42,499 --> 01:48:44,490
It could erase that double-bogey.

1648
01:48:44,668 --> 01:48:46,568
Best thing that ever happened to him.

1649
01:49:16,466 --> 01:49:18,457
Oh, that was great.

1650
01:49:18,668 --> 01:49:22,468
I didn't know there was a mirror
in here. Isn't that cute?

1651
01:49:34,150 --> 01:49:36,141
Let me just look at my...

1652
01:50:20,964 --> 01:50:24,024
Looks level. Roll it in like
you know what you're doing.

1653
01:50:26,970 --> 01:50:28,631
Hit it close, sport.

1654
01:51:05,241 --> 01:51:07,471
How did he get the name Tin Cup?

1655
01:51:07,711 --> 01:51:10,805
He was the catcher on the
high school baseball team.

1656
01:51:10,980 --> 01:51:12,971
Star pitcher had a curve.

1657
01:51:13,149 --> 01:51:15,344
Not all his pitches hit Roy in the mitt.

1658
01:51:16,453 --> 01:51:20,355
Team thought "Tin Cup" was a
whole lot better than "Clank."

1659
01:51:28,298 --> 01:51:29,526
Fuck.

1660
01:51:31,735 --> 01:51:32,827
Too bad.

1661
01:51:49,853 --> 01:51:52,185
Can I ask you a question?

1662
01:51:53,256 --> 01:51:55,486
Have you ever had a Latin lover?

1663
01:51:55,859 --> 01:51:59,386
Where does he get his name
from is what I want to know.

1664
01:52:01,765 --> 01:52:05,929
Why did you wait so long to
leave that Simms character?

1665
01:52:06,102 --> 01:52:11,039
It takes time to realize Prince Charming
might be wearing a beer-stained shirt...

1666
01:52:11,207 --> 01:52:12,765
...eating sausage...

1667
01:52:12,942 --> 01:52:16,708
...making $7 an hour
in some driving range.

1668
01:52:16,880 --> 01:52:21,783
You don't try to fix men, I hope.
Men cannot be fixed, especially him.

1669
01:52:22,051 --> 01:52:24,952
I've been pathetically
slow learning that lesson.

1670
01:52:25,588 --> 01:52:27,112
- How are you?
- How are you?

1671
01:52:27,290 --> 01:52:28,120
Good.

1672
01:52:28,291 --> 01:52:29,588
I could use help.

1673
01:52:29,793 --> 01:52:33,593
I've seen what you've done with McAvoy.
It could come in handy.

1674
01:52:33,797 --> 01:52:35,890
Let me give you my card.

1675
01:52:36,065 --> 01:52:37,123
Great.

1676
01:52:37,333 --> 01:52:41,463
If you have more of these, a bunch of
the other guys could use your help.

1677
01:52:41,671 --> 01:52:43,002
Take them all.

1678
01:52:43,173 --> 01:52:45,266
- This is Doreen.
- Hi, how are you?

1679
01:52:45,408 --> 01:52:47,672
My number's there, call any time.

1680
01:52:47,877 --> 01:52:50,471
I counsel couples, so bring
your caddie if you want.

1681
01:52:50,680 --> 01:52:52,477
I'll think about it,
and I'll give you a call.

1682
01:52:52,682 --> 01:52:53,410
Thanks.

1683
01:52:53,583 --> 01:52:55,346
Bye, nice meeting you.

1684
01:52:55,952 --> 01:52:56,680
Cheers.

1685
01:52:56,886 --> 01:52:57,818
Cheers.

1686
01:53:22,979 --> 01:53:25,971
That puts Jacobsen
into a tie at 7, guys.

1687
01:53:26,149 --> 01:53:30,051
That Tin Cup guy is one shot back.
Let's keep abreast of that.

1688
01:53:30,620 --> 01:53:33,521
That birdie by Peter
Jacobsen forged a tie...

1689
01:53:33,790 --> 01:53:35,951
...at 7 under with David Simms.

1690
01:53:36,125 --> 01:53:38,958
And Roy McAvoy
just won't go away.

1691
01:53:39,128 --> 01:53:41,858
He's only one shot back at 6 under par.

1692
01:53:58,381 --> 01:54:02,511
He's throwing darts. If we don't make
birdies, we're playing for second.

1693
01:54:02,819 --> 01:54:05,049
Can you believe McAvoy's still here?

1694
01:54:05,221 --> 01:54:08,315
I can't believe "Tin Cup" might
appear with my name on a trophy.

1695
01:54:08,458 --> 01:54:11,985
It's come down to the 72nd
hole of this championship...

1696
01:54:12,161 --> 01:54:16,063
...and 3 men all battling to be
crowned the Open champion.

1697
01:54:16,232 --> 01:54:18,063
Jacobsen's on the fairway...

1698
01:54:18,234 --> 01:54:19,633
...at 8 under par...

1699
01:54:19,836 --> 01:54:23,328
...tied for the lead with Roy
McAvoy, who's on the 18th tee.

1700
01:54:23,473 --> 01:54:26,636
And David Simms is back
there trailing by one.

1701
01:54:43,259 --> 01:54:45,352
- Jacobsen's laying up.
- Took out an iron.

1702
01:54:45,461 --> 01:54:49,864
Jacobsen's going to lay up.
He's tied for the lead.

1703
01:54:50,033 --> 01:54:52,024
Assures himself of a par...

1704
01:54:52,201 --> 01:54:53,259
...and with his short game...

1705
01:54:53,436 --> 01:54:54,733
...he could make birdie.

1706
01:54:55,939 --> 01:54:57,930
You ain't going to have that luxury.

1707
01:55:00,109 --> 01:55:01,872
Not if you play to win.

1708
01:55:28,137 --> 01:55:30,230
We've seen this position before.

1709
01:55:30,406 --> 01:55:33,466
McAvoy with another
perfect drive at the 18th.

1710
01:55:33,610 --> 01:55:37,706
The last thing he needs right now
is an excuse to go for the green.

1711
01:55:37,981 --> 01:55:39,243
I didn't catch it all.

1712
01:55:39,415 --> 01:55:42,475
Well, that's okay.
You'll have to lay up then.

1713
01:56:18,021 --> 01:56:19,579
This is for par.

1714
01:56:22,759 --> 01:56:24,522
So, birdie wins it.

1715
01:56:25,461 --> 01:56:26,826
That's par.

1716
01:56:28,197 --> 01:56:29,528
He's in the lead.

1717
01:56:31,034 --> 01:56:32,661
They all must catch him.

1718
01:56:32,835 --> 01:56:34,132
You or me, Dave?

1719
01:56:46,616 --> 01:56:48,049
He's laying up.

1720
01:56:49,052 --> 01:56:50,485
He's laying up.

1721
01:56:52,055 --> 01:56:56,549
Birdie to tie, eagle to win.
Gutless wonder's laying up.

1722
01:56:56,693 --> 01:57:00,493
It's birdie to win and par
to tie for you. Lay up.

1723
01:57:01,664 --> 01:57:04,360
You can still make a birdie laying up.

1724
01:57:05,068 --> 01:57:06,558
You know what?

1725
01:57:06,703 --> 01:57:09,399
If I make an eagle that puts me 10 under.

1726
01:57:09,572 --> 01:57:12,700
No one's ever finished an Open
10 under, not even Nicklaus.

1727
01:57:13,342 --> 01:57:17,574
You don't need an eagle to win.
Birdie wins, par ties.

1728
01:57:17,714 --> 01:57:18,874
Lay it up.

1729
01:57:21,651 --> 01:57:25,815
Birdie wins, parties. Hole out
a wedge for a goddamn eagle?!

1730
01:57:28,024 --> 01:57:29,514
This is everything.

1731
01:57:29,826 --> 01:57:33,592
This is the choice it comes down
to, this is our immortality.

1732
01:57:33,730 --> 01:57:37,826
Don't think about immortality,
think "hit the 7-iron."

1733
01:57:41,771 --> 01:57:46,606
No, no, no. This is what always
happens. He's going for it.

1734
01:57:46,776 --> 01:57:47,765
Go for it!

1735
01:57:51,214 --> 01:57:52,772
Molly, get a grip.

1736
01:57:53,282 --> 01:57:56,774
He only needs par to tie.
Tell him to lay up.

1737
01:57:56,953 --> 01:57:59,444
Go for it, Roy! Just knock it on!

1738
01:58:00,389 --> 01:58:04,120
This is why we broke up.
He always went for it.

1739
01:58:04,293 --> 01:58:08,457
My problem is, I've never been
with a man who went for it.

1740
01:58:08,631 --> 01:58:10,963
Honey, he's your guy.

1741
01:58:13,236 --> 01:58:14,897
One swing, Roy.

1742
01:58:15,471 --> 01:58:17,564
One good swing.

1743
01:58:20,243 --> 01:58:22,905
John Daly couldn't do it.
What's he doing?

1744
01:58:23,079 --> 01:58:25,912
Unbelievable he's going
for it 4 days in a row.

1745
01:58:26,082 --> 01:58:28,073
No, 3 days he's put it in the water.

1746
01:58:28,251 --> 01:58:30,742
It'll be 4 days if he hits his 3-wood.

1747
01:58:33,089 --> 01:58:34,647
Come on, baby.

1748
01:58:34,924 --> 01:58:36,255
We're home.

1749
01:58:37,426 --> 01:58:38,916
This has a chance.

1750
01:58:39,095 --> 01:58:40,255
It's got to go.

1751
01:58:40,429 --> 01:58:42,829
This has a chance.
I think he's done it.

1752
01:58:45,768 --> 01:58:46,928
Little gust there.

1753
01:58:58,347 --> 01:58:59,439
Stay up!

1754
01:58:59,682 --> 01:59:00,842
Stay up!

1755
01:59:01,851 --> 01:59:03,011
Stay up!

1756
01:59:20,036 --> 01:59:22,197
You can still make par from there.

1757
01:59:22,371 --> 01:59:23,201
Right.

1758
01:59:23,639 --> 01:59:26,039
Take a drop, we'll make par, we'll tie.

1759
01:59:26,209 --> 01:59:29,474
I nutted that thing.
I mean, I nutted it.

1760
01:59:29,812 --> 01:59:32,212
I know. You put a hell of a move on it.

1761
01:59:32,381 --> 01:59:34,645
Little gust from the gods cost me.

1762
01:59:34,817 --> 01:59:36,717
We'll take our drop, tie...

1763
01:59:36,886 --> 01:59:38,148
...and win the playoff.

1764
01:59:38,321 --> 01:59:40,380
- I can make that shot!
- I know!

1765
01:59:40,556 --> 01:59:42,046
- But not now!
- Now!

1766
01:59:42,825 --> 01:59:45,385
I'm playing it from right here, now.

1767
01:59:46,896 --> 01:59:48,227
Make your par.

1768
01:59:49,065 --> 01:59:49,724
Now.

1769
01:59:50,233 --> 01:59:51,495
Take your drop.

1770
01:59:52,001 --> 01:59:53,059
Give me a ball.

1771
01:59:53,236 --> 01:59:54,897
Unbelievable.

1772
01:59:57,406 --> 01:59:59,397
I can't watch this.

1773
02:00:06,015 --> 02:00:07,073
Fourth shot.

1774
02:00:07,850 --> 02:00:12,253
I don't believe this. He could go
up, use the drop zone, make par...

1775
02:00:12,421 --> 02:00:15,686
...force a playoff with
Jacobsen and get out of here.

1776
02:00:15,858 --> 02:00:19,191
Easy, guys. He can still make 5.
He can still make 5.

1777
02:00:19,362 --> 02:00:21,421
We could still have a playoff.

1778
02:00:43,052 --> 02:00:44,110
Give me a ball.

1779
02:00:44,787 --> 02:00:45,776
Take a drop.

1780
02:00:46,789 --> 02:00:48,222
Give me a ball!

1781
02:00:49,058 --> 02:00:50,389
Just take your drop.

1782
02:00:57,466 --> 02:00:59,730
Dropping 5, hitting 6.

1783
02:00:59,902 --> 02:01:04,134
What's he doing? All he'd have to
do is walk up there and take a drop.

1784
02:01:04,307 --> 02:01:06,741
Make a 5, for crying out loud.
That's insane.

1785
02:01:07,243 --> 02:01:08,972
Somebody tackle him.

1786
02:01:11,414 --> 02:01:12,642
Give me a ball.

1787
02:01:24,994 --> 02:01:26,154
Dropping 7...

1788
02:01:26,329 --> 02:01:28,263
...hitting his 8th shot.

1789
02:01:34,003 --> 02:01:36,665
It's a miracle he lasted this long.

1790
02:01:44,613 --> 02:01:46,774
We ought to have
a camera on Simms.

1791
02:01:46,949 --> 02:01:48,507
He can't watch.

1792
02:01:48,684 --> 02:01:51,517
Someone tell him he doesn't
have to hit it from there.

1793
02:01:53,456 --> 02:01:56,016
He's dropping 9. He's hitting 10.

1794
02:02:09,138 --> 02:02:11,299
God, I'm going to faint.

1795
02:02:12,875 --> 02:02:14,035
Oh, Jesus.

1796
02:02:21,217 --> 02:02:25,381
This is the last ball in the bag.
This gets wet, we're disqualified.

1797
02:02:25,654 --> 02:02:27,383
I can make it across.

1798
02:02:27,556 --> 02:02:28,648
Then do it.

1799
02:02:28,824 --> 02:02:30,382
Quit fucking around.

1800
02:02:40,836 --> 02:02:42,064
He's crazy.

1801
02:02:43,506 --> 02:02:45,497
Oh, God. He's right.

1802
02:02:45,674 --> 02:02:48,837
You're right, Roy!
Just knock it on! Let her rip!

1803
02:02:49,011 --> 02:02:51,502
- You're losing it.
- I have lost it.

1804
02:02:52,181 --> 02:02:53,239
But so has he.

1805
02:02:56,419 --> 02:02:58,353
- He's crazy.
- So are you.

1806
02:02:58,587 --> 02:03:00,020
This is a 12.

1807
02:03:00,189 --> 02:03:03,920
He must start worrying about
qualifying for next year's Open.

1808
02:03:04,093 --> 02:03:05,355
He lost this one.

1809
02:03:05,528 --> 02:03:07,086
He'll end up selling...

1810
02:03:07,263 --> 02:03:10,755
...ties and renting golf
carts the rest of his life.

1811
02:03:10,933 --> 02:03:15,199
I don't know what I'm feeling. This is
the most painful thing I've ever seen.

1812
02:03:15,538 --> 02:03:19,440
He doesn't finish the
hole with this ball...

1813
02:03:19,608 --> 02:03:21,200
...he's disqualified.

1814
02:03:21,377 --> 02:03:24,369
Oh, my God. Dear Lord, please.
Dear Lord.

1815
02:03:48,304 --> 02:03:49,066
Get over.

1816
02:03:55,578 --> 02:03:56,408
He's over.

1817
02:04:24,406 --> 02:04:26,237
I can't believe it!

1818
02:04:28,811 --> 02:04:30,472
I love you!

1819
02:04:32,581 --> 02:04:34,071
My God!

1820
02:04:49,331 --> 02:04:51,492
- Unbelievable!
- Jesus Christ!

1821
02:04:51,667 --> 02:04:53,430
Did you see this?

1822
02:04:54,770 --> 02:04:57,330
That was a 12. That was a 12.

1823
02:04:57,606 --> 02:04:59,938
He was on the green
and in and out in 12.

1824
02:06:04,106 --> 02:06:06,199
Boss, you blew that one.

1825
02:06:06,375 --> 02:06:10,106
- I didn't come here to play for second.
- Simms'll always be second.

1826
02:06:14,950 --> 02:06:18,886
I'll meet you at the Winnebago!
I'll fire up the blender!

1827
02:06:22,458 --> 02:06:24,551
I just gave away the U.S. Open.

1828
02:06:30,299 --> 02:06:34,292
That was incredible! That was
the shot of the tournament!

1829
02:06:34,903 --> 02:06:37,235
I just gave away the U.S. Open.

1830
02:06:37,406 --> 02:06:38,737
It doesn't matter.

1831
02:06:39,575 --> 02:06:43,477
One time in my life I know the
safe play to hit and I still...

1832
02:06:43,646 --> 02:06:45,637
Shit, I still can't make myself do it.

1833
02:06:45,814 --> 02:06:46,746
It doesn't matter.

1834
02:06:46,915 --> 02:06:49,907
My whole career, my whole
life on the line...

1835
02:06:50,085 --> 02:06:52,576
I just made a 12 on the
last hole of the Open!

1836
02:06:52,755 --> 02:06:56,088
You sure did. It was the
greatest 12 of all time.

1837
02:06:56,258 --> 02:06:59,659
No one's going to remember the
Open 5 years from now, who won...

1838
02:06:59,828 --> 02:07:01,659
...but they'll remember your 12!

1839
02:07:01,830 --> 02:07:05,266
My, God, Roy, it was...
Well, it's immortal!

1840
02:07:05,434 --> 02:07:07,425
I am so proud of you!

1841
02:07:11,774 --> 02:07:13,765
I gotta hand it to you.

1842
02:07:13,942 --> 02:07:17,002
When you go down,
you go down in flames.

1843
02:07:18,347 --> 02:07:19,678
Never mind.

1844
02:07:20,282 --> 02:07:21,340
Kiss me.

1845
02:07:22,685 --> 02:07:25,176
- David, you got a minute?
- Not right now.

1846
02:07:26,689 --> 02:07:28,281
Can I have your autograph?

1847
02:07:28,457 --> 02:07:31,358
Sure, I always got time
for my fans, darling.

1848
02:07:31,527 --> 02:07:34,018
Don't you look cute. Come on under.

1849
02:07:41,203 --> 02:07:43,034
Nice par, David.

1850
02:08:29,418 --> 02:08:34,253
By finishing in the top 15 at the Open
you qualified to be in it next year.

1851
02:08:35,090 --> 02:08:36,182
Really?

1852
02:08:37,860 --> 02:08:39,760
I didn't know that.

1853
02:08:39,928 --> 02:08:44,524
With your game you could go back to the
qualifying school and go out on tour.

1854
02:08:46,935 --> 02:08:48,368
Then I wouldn't see you.

1855
02:08:49,271 --> 02:08:53,605
Actually, I picked up a whole
bunch of new clients at the Open.

1856
02:08:53,776 --> 02:08:57,712
Guys said if I could do that for you,
imagine what I could do for them.

1857
02:08:59,615 --> 02:09:02,106
There's a lot of head cases out there.

1858
02:09:03,452 --> 02:09:05,716
A man goes through what I have...

1859
02:09:05,888 --> 02:09:07,378
...he's supposed to learn something.

1860
02:09:07,556 --> 02:09:09,615
I'm trying to figure out what I learned.

1861
02:09:12,060 --> 02:09:13,960
You think I learned anything?

1862
02:09:14,897 --> 02:09:17,957
You learned a little discipline,
some self-control.

1863
02:09:18,133 --> 02:09:19,725
I learned...

1864
02:09:19,902 --> 02:09:23,895
...you can't just listen to your
heart, but also to your brain.

1865
02:09:24,072 --> 02:09:26,802
I'm learning how to listen
to that tuning fork...

1866
02:09:26,975 --> 02:09:29,136
...throw caution to the wind and...

1867
02:09:29,311 --> 02:09:32,644
...take crazy risks I never
thought were possible.

1868
02:09:32,981 --> 02:09:36,144
Come on, Molly, when did
you ever take a crazy risk?

1869
02:09:37,252 --> 02:09:39,152
I'm with you, Roy.

1870
02:09:42,324 --> 02:09:43,985
I'm with you.

1871
02:09:48,263 --> 02:09:49,594
You know...

1872
02:09:50,432 --> 02:09:52,423
...we could kiss...

1873
02:09:53,769 --> 02:09:56,602
You mean like a no harm, no foul kiss?

1874
02:09:56,772 --> 02:09:59,605
Yeah, kind of a semi-platonic little...

1875
02:10:00,442 --> 02:10:01,431
...sweet...

1876
02:10:01,610 --> 02:10:02,838
...innocent...

1877
02:10:03,011 --> 02:10:04,501
Good idea!

1878
02:10:09,501 --> 02:10:39,501
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