1 00:00:22,522 --> 00:00:26,390 LA GRANDE BOUFFE 2 00:02:00,753 --> 00:02:03,347 Are you taking the preserves too? 3 00:02:03,456 --> 00:02:05,219 I have to take a gift. 4 00:02:10,296 --> 00:02:12,491 And you're also taking... 5 00:02:12,599 --> 00:02:15,796 your recipes and your knives. 6 00:02:32,785 --> 00:02:36,346 Your poor father bought you the best German knives. 7 00:02:36,456 --> 00:02:39,983 And at 14, you left Carpugnino... 8 00:02:41,828 --> 00:02:45,127 With your knives! You've told us all that. 9 00:02:45,231 --> 00:02:47,199 But what I don't see is... 10 00:02:47,300 --> 00:02:51,134 what you plan to do with your damned knives this weekend. 11 00:02:52,872 --> 00:02:56,740 And do you have lemon dishwashing products? 12 00:02:56,843 --> 00:02:58,640 Yes, there's that too. 13 00:02:59,812 --> 00:03:03,680 Lemon freshness, nature's own cleaner. 14 00:03:03,783 --> 00:03:06,047 Did you remember rubber gloves? 15 00:03:12,625 --> 00:03:14,456 The new kind. 16 00:03:16,729 --> 00:03:18,356 More sensitive. 17 00:03:21,568 --> 00:03:23,433 For housework... 18 00:03:25,471 --> 00:03:27,439 gloves are important. 19 00:03:28,675 --> 00:03:32,008 Flexibility and toughness. 20 00:03:32,111 --> 00:03:36,241 Flexibility, not to lose the feel of the object. 21 00:03:36,349 --> 00:03:37,907 Toughness... 22 00:03:39,752 --> 00:03:42,016 for doing the work. 23 00:03:52,098 --> 00:03:56,728 That makes exactly four weeks of taped shows. 24 00:03:56,836 --> 00:03:59,270 I can leave in peace. God, what a feeling! 25 00:03:59,372 --> 00:04:00,805 But then what? 26 00:04:00,907 --> 00:04:04,638 Then the project I told you about. 27 00:04:04,744 --> 00:04:07,907 Right now I need rest and solitude. 28 00:04:08,014 --> 00:04:10,676 What's wrong? Take it easy. 29 00:04:10,783 --> 00:04:14,480 TV isn't your life. Think about your life. 30 00:04:14,587 --> 00:04:17,750 I think I'd better. I'll try yoga. 31 00:04:19,058 --> 00:04:23,119 Before I go, I'll do a good deed... give my daughter a gift. 32 00:04:28,201 --> 00:04:30,169 I've been waiting 45 minutes. 33 00:04:45,585 --> 00:04:47,985 When one decides to get away... 34 00:04:48,087 --> 00:04:51,716 Where are you going? Why did you ask me to come? 35 00:04:51,824 --> 00:04:53,815 To see you before I leave. 36 00:04:53,926 --> 00:04:56,326 If I wait to hear from you... 37 00:04:58,031 --> 00:05:01,398 - Seen your mother? How is she? - I guess she's fine. 38 00:05:01,501 --> 00:05:06,404 - I take it you don't see her much? - Oh, that paternal authority. 39 00:05:06,539 --> 00:05:08,530 I'm going. 40 00:05:08,641 --> 00:05:10,609 A series of news reports. 41 00:05:13,212 --> 00:05:16,079 Would you like to use the apartment? 42 00:05:16,182 --> 00:05:18,514 No hell-raising. 43 00:05:18,618 --> 00:05:21,644 Watch out for the neighbors... all old fools. 44 00:05:21,754 --> 00:05:24,018 Fuck paternal authority. 45 00:05:25,158 --> 00:05:26,455 What else? 46 00:05:35,335 --> 00:05:38,202 I'd like you to find him a job before you go. 47 00:05:38,304 --> 00:05:41,831 He's a great dancer. I want you to get him work. 48 00:06:19,712 --> 00:06:22,374 No more shuttle, and the bus has gone. 49 00:06:45,638 --> 00:06:48,835 There they are. Careful. It's heavy. 50 00:07:08,828 --> 00:07:11,922 You can roll it. 51 00:07:50,503 --> 00:07:52,095 10:00. 52 00:08:07,420 --> 00:08:09,115 Wake up. 53 00:08:15,294 --> 00:08:18,923 That work still isn't finished. 54 00:08:24,570 --> 00:08:27,733 Give me a number where I can reach you... 55 00:08:27,840 --> 00:08:29,671 in an emergency. 56 00:08:33,212 --> 00:08:36,272 Why must I always tell you where I go? 57 00:08:36,382 --> 00:08:38,316 I have to know. 58 00:08:38,417 --> 00:08:40,282 Your slippers. 59 00:08:41,721 --> 00:08:44,281 God, give me patience. 60 00:09:25,765 --> 00:09:27,528 The court having deliberated... 61 00:09:27,633 --> 00:09:31,569 and, in accordance with the evidence, convicted... 62 00:09:32,738 --> 00:09:34,797 If my colleagues could see me. 63 00:09:36,042 --> 00:09:38,272 They take me for a serious man! 64 00:09:40,079 --> 00:09:42,673 For the last time, where are you going? 65 00:09:42,782 --> 00:09:44,409 But I've told you... 66 00:09:44,517 --> 00:09:47,816 to a legal conference in London. 67 00:09:47,920 --> 00:09:51,117 That's not true. You're a liar. 68 00:09:59,765 --> 00:10:03,257 Let's not fight, especially today. 69 00:10:03,369 --> 00:10:05,132 Why particularly today? 70 00:10:07,840 --> 00:10:09,364 Don't worry. 71 00:10:09,475 --> 00:10:14,174 I've arranged for you to have a power of attorney at the bank. 72 00:10:15,481 --> 00:10:17,073 Understand? 73 00:10:19,385 --> 00:10:22,115 What are you talking about? 74 00:10:26,225 --> 00:10:28,523 No, not that. 75 00:10:28,628 --> 00:10:32,189 You're responsible to your parents, poor dears. 76 00:10:32,298 --> 00:10:37,201 But I won't be involved in all this! The picture stays here. 77 00:10:37,303 --> 00:10:39,669 I've given my life for what? 78 00:10:39,772 --> 00:10:41,763 To not know where you're going! 79 00:10:47,213 --> 00:10:50,273 I understand. 80 00:10:50,383 --> 00:10:52,647 You're going to the whores again. 81 00:10:52,752 --> 00:10:55,880 - Give me the picture. - Never! 82 00:10:55,988 --> 00:10:57,615 You're crazy. 83 00:11:02,928 --> 00:11:06,489 Don't do it. Don't go there. 84 00:11:06,599 --> 00:11:08,829 Think of your career! 85 00:11:08,934 --> 00:11:11,630 Promise me you won't do it. 86 00:11:11,737 --> 00:11:15,264 I'll sacrifice myself, as I always have. 87 00:11:15,374 --> 00:11:18,366 We can keep it in the family. 88 00:11:18,477 --> 00:11:23,278 Nicole, do you know what you're saying? 89 00:11:23,382 --> 00:11:27,443 Who rocked you in her arms? Who suckled you? 90 00:11:35,227 --> 00:11:37,024 I've got to go. 91 00:11:40,633 --> 00:11:42,863 You always rape me, and... 92 00:11:45,604 --> 00:11:48,471 Do you think whores can take my place? 93 00:11:48,574 --> 00:11:50,166 No, Philippe. 94 00:12:21,841 --> 00:12:23,832 Eating alone, eh? 95 00:13:23,035 --> 00:13:26,436 It's a house my father bought... 96 00:13:26,539 --> 00:13:30,999 just after World War I, from a Polish engineer... 97 00:13:31,110 --> 00:13:33,510 to give to my mother. 98 00:13:33,612 --> 00:13:35,580 But she'd never live here. 99 00:13:35,681 --> 00:13:37,581 Lend me your hat? 100 00:13:37,683 --> 00:13:41,084 She found it too frivolous... 101 00:13:41,187 --> 00:13:44,452 so we stayed at the apartment in Paris. 102 00:13:47,126 --> 00:13:48,753 There's old Hector... 103 00:13:49,929 --> 00:13:52,898 my father's old chauffeur. 104 00:13:52,998 --> 00:13:54,795 How old is he? 105 00:13:54,900 --> 00:13:58,961 I can't say, but I've always known him. 106 00:13:59,071 --> 00:14:01,403 Now he lives here alone... 107 00:14:03,609 --> 00:14:05,236 with the dog. 108 00:14:08,948 --> 00:14:10,506 This is Ugo. 109 00:14:13,185 --> 00:14:15,449 This is old Catherine. 110 00:14:15,554 --> 00:14:20,116 I think you will be pleased. I spared no expense. 111 00:14:20,226 --> 00:14:23,024 Everything is of the finest quality. 112 00:14:25,464 --> 00:14:27,022 Can we go in now? 113 00:14:27,132 --> 00:14:30,590 Tell your friends the dog is very mean. 114 00:14:30,703 --> 00:14:34,799 Watch out for the dog. He's not always nice. 115 00:14:54,059 --> 00:14:56,550 - How are you, Hector? - Fine, Mr. Philippe. 116 00:15:03,469 --> 00:15:06,336 - Where are you going? - Upstairs. 117 00:15:06,438 --> 00:15:08,372 Who is that, Hector? 118 00:15:08,474 --> 00:15:11,409 A man from the Chinese Embassy. He has a gift. 119 00:15:21,320 --> 00:15:25,188 Excuse me. I'll see to my guests and be right with you. 120 00:15:25,291 --> 00:15:27,316 I have plenty of time. 121 00:15:32,898 --> 00:15:34,559 Exploring, Captain? 122 00:15:40,039 --> 00:15:44,032 It's a stroke of luck... 123 00:15:44,143 --> 00:15:46,008 your finding me here! 124 00:15:46,111 --> 00:15:48,170 I rarely come to this house... 125 00:15:48,280 --> 00:15:50,612 though it's mine, or was my father's. 126 00:15:50,716 --> 00:15:54,846 Excuse me, sir. Mr. President, I've got to see the kitchen. 127 00:15:54,954 --> 00:15:58,651 - There's work to be done. - Please sit down. I'll be right back. 128 00:15:58,757 --> 00:16:02,853 Hector, let's see the wonders you've wrought in the kitchen. 129 00:16:38,530 --> 00:16:40,157 Taste this! 130 00:16:41,300 --> 00:16:43,200 - Blood pudding? - No, thank you. 131 00:16:43,302 --> 00:16:45,964 Is the wind still from your place? 132 00:16:47,272 --> 00:16:49,001 Where's the cheese? 133 00:16:50,843 --> 00:16:52,811 Nobody for blood pudding? 134 00:17:00,085 --> 00:17:03,418 Marcello, our friends want you. 135 00:17:03,522 --> 00:17:07,151 Sir, allow me to offer you a little welcoming snack. 136 00:17:07,259 --> 00:17:12,026 We are gathered for a gastronomic seminar. 137 00:17:12,131 --> 00:17:15,100 Allow me to present a small gift. 138 00:17:18,771 --> 00:17:21,171 It is a character... 139 00:17:21,273 --> 00:17:24,436 from our theater called ''The Red Lantern. '' 140 00:17:26,345 --> 00:17:28,142 It's really superb! 141 00:17:33,118 --> 00:17:35,814 ''Beware of Greeks bearing gifts. '' 142 00:17:37,122 --> 00:17:39,647 They want you. 143 00:17:39,758 --> 00:17:41,988 I'll take the Chinese room. 144 00:17:43,662 --> 00:17:47,462 I'm terribly sorry to have to decline... 145 00:17:47,566 --> 00:17:49,796 your gracious offer. 146 00:17:51,236 --> 00:17:53,966 The car keys. I left my suitcase. 147 00:17:54,073 --> 00:17:55,631 Can I taste? 148 00:17:57,076 --> 00:17:58,771 The small one. 149 00:17:58,877 --> 00:18:02,074 I understand your refusal perfectly. 150 00:18:02,181 --> 00:18:06,447 If an aura of sentiment does not cling to a house... 151 00:18:06,552 --> 00:18:10,955 if the least of its walls is not steeped in family tradition... 152 00:18:11,056 --> 00:18:13,957 then the idea of a home is an empty one. 153 00:18:15,394 --> 00:18:17,055 A fierce, wild boar... 154 00:18:17,162 --> 00:18:19,926 ready for all the subtlest marinades. 155 00:18:20,032 --> 00:18:22,364 That's good meat. 156 00:18:22,468 --> 00:18:27,064 Two superb soft-eyed deer, the flesh redolent... 157 00:18:27,172 --> 00:18:28,867 of the Couves forest. 158 00:18:28,974 --> 00:18:30,498 Is it frozen? 159 00:18:30,609 --> 00:18:33,908 So what? I'm all for progress when necessary. 160 00:18:36,448 --> 00:18:39,042 That's good meat. 161 00:18:44,123 --> 00:18:47,183 Ten dozen semi-wild guinea hens... 162 00:18:47,292 --> 00:18:48,919 fed on grain and juniper. 163 00:18:56,268 --> 00:18:58,202 Our friends want you. 164 00:19:01,140 --> 00:19:02,573 Nice sweater. 165 00:19:14,786 --> 00:19:16,583 Beautiful car, eh? 166 00:19:19,892 --> 00:19:24,352 You know, Bugatti had his shoes made to order... 167 00:19:24,463 --> 00:19:27,489 like gloves, with a separate big toe. 168 00:19:29,268 --> 00:19:31,759 - To drive? - No, for every day. 169 00:19:31,870 --> 00:19:33,735 There was an artist! 170 00:19:35,174 --> 00:19:37,836 Look. What magnificence. 171 00:19:37,943 --> 00:19:40,776 Three dozen young Ardennes roosters. 172 00:19:40,879 --> 00:19:44,212 - What's going on? - Twenty dozen Bresse chickens. 173 00:19:44,316 --> 00:19:48,218 Codfish. Oh, wow, does it stink! 174 00:19:48,320 --> 00:19:50,345 A hindquarter of beef... 175 00:19:50,455 --> 00:19:53,015 from the rich pastures of Charolais. 176 00:19:54,193 --> 00:19:57,253 You'll see how much fun it is to cut up. 177 00:19:57,362 --> 00:20:01,093 Five young salt-marsh lambs from Mont St. Michel. 178 00:20:01,200 --> 00:20:03,225 A good cook could make... 179 00:20:03,335 --> 00:20:05,064 a good surgeon! 180 00:20:07,039 --> 00:20:10,065 Always clowning, while we do the work. 181 00:20:17,182 --> 00:20:18,979 Don't be vulgar, Ugo. 182 00:20:22,421 --> 00:20:24,514 The feast begins. 183 00:20:52,050 --> 00:20:53,540 That's good meat. 184 00:21:02,060 --> 00:21:04,585 I always did that as a child. 185 00:21:04,696 --> 00:21:07,187 Do you remember, Hector? 186 00:21:11,303 --> 00:21:12,930 He's asleep. 187 00:21:43,368 --> 00:21:46,997 You can go now. Time for bed. 188 00:21:47,105 --> 00:21:49,505 Thanks for everything. 189 00:21:49,608 --> 00:21:51,599 Still know how to drive? 190 00:21:53,045 --> 00:21:55,741 I still have my license. 191 00:21:57,549 --> 00:21:59,346 Take the car back. 192 00:22:01,019 --> 00:22:03,351 Don't say a thing to Nicole. 193 00:22:10,329 --> 00:22:13,765 There's so much to do to put this kitchen in order. 194 00:22:17,569 --> 00:22:19,127 Can we sing? 195 00:22:20,205 --> 00:22:22,230 Remember, not a word to Nicole. 196 00:23:00,078 --> 00:23:03,241 Looks like Michelangelo's Pieta. 197 00:23:03,348 --> 00:23:06,044 I'm sure it's intentional. 198 00:23:06,151 --> 00:23:08,119 A trifle blasphemous. 199 00:23:23,034 --> 00:23:25,025 Marcello, ready to race? 200 00:24:05,844 --> 00:24:08,210 Fifteen seconds. 201 00:24:08,313 --> 00:24:09,803 I lose. 202 00:24:19,958 --> 00:24:22,518 The expression of a whole era. 203 00:24:27,232 --> 00:24:29,860 I'm a sex maniac. 204 00:24:29,968 --> 00:24:33,165 You're getting hot over a funeral. 205 00:24:34,306 --> 00:24:38,003 We're not getting hot. It's a collection I made as a boy... 206 00:24:38,109 --> 00:24:41,169 which is both sentimental and artistic. 207 00:24:41,279 --> 00:24:43,270 Now this is life. Look. 208 00:25:00,165 --> 00:25:01,996 Let's see. 209 00:25:04,503 --> 00:25:07,233 What artistic lighting. 210 00:25:46,845 --> 00:25:49,177 What a splendid drawing. 211 00:25:49,281 --> 00:25:51,613 A Gall� drawing, 1890. 212 00:25:52,751 --> 00:25:54,275 Beautiful. 213 00:25:54,386 --> 00:25:56,911 Open this, please. 214 00:25:57,022 --> 00:25:58,887 Which dessert? 215 00:25:58,990 --> 00:26:01,788 Preserves or Crepes Suzette? 216 00:26:01,893 --> 00:26:03,724 I'll have CrEEEpes Suzette. 217 00:26:06,464 --> 00:26:10,901 Gentlemen, we're not here for a vulgar orgy. 218 00:26:12,270 --> 00:26:15,000 We can't just sit here forever. 219 00:26:15,106 --> 00:26:17,666 We must clear up this dining room. 220 00:26:37,395 --> 00:26:39,363 ''Off to work we go. '' 221 00:26:46,438 --> 00:26:49,498 No, no oranges today. 222 00:26:50,775 --> 00:26:53,266 Tomorrow for breakfast. 223 00:27:18,703 --> 00:27:23,970 We have to skim the fat from the bouillon. 224 00:27:25,110 --> 00:27:27,840 We have to feed these turkeys... 225 00:27:27,946 --> 00:27:31,939 chocolate, nuts and cognac. 226 00:27:32,050 --> 00:27:34,450 It gives an exquisite taste. 227 00:27:34,552 --> 00:27:36,179 So? What do we do? 228 00:27:36,287 --> 00:27:38,414 Are you my assistant or not? 229 00:27:38,523 --> 00:27:41,515 Then wash your hands. Did you pee? 230 00:27:41,626 --> 00:27:43,457 What an idiot. 231 00:27:44,663 --> 00:27:47,291 - What time is it? - 6:30. 232 00:27:50,568 --> 00:27:54,766 When I was a kitchen boy at the Charlton Ceneto... 233 00:27:54,873 --> 00:27:57,205 know what time I got up? 234 00:27:57,308 --> 00:27:58,775 4:00. 235 00:28:00,478 --> 00:28:03,072 Here's the stock. 236 00:28:05,884 --> 00:28:07,647 The dough. 237 00:28:09,454 --> 00:28:11,285 - What's that? - Conical strainer. 238 00:28:12,657 --> 00:28:15,251 We're going to strain... 239 00:28:15,360 --> 00:28:17,328 the stock. 240 00:28:17,429 --> 00:28:19,920 Oh, very good. 241 00:28:20,031 --> 00:28:23,990 Stock in the kitchen is my stock in trade. 242 00:28:59,738 --> 00:29:01,865 Hello, Marcello. Up already? 243 00:29:06,411 --> 00:29:08,140 I didn't sleep. 244 00:29:22,961 --> 00:29:24,724 You're all set up! 245 00:29:24,829 --> 00:29:27,423 I like my chimney-nook. 246 00:29:27,532 --> 00:29:29,466 It's my little world. 247 00:29:30,869 --> 00:29:32,734 A real homebody. 248 00:29:36,608 --> 00:29:38,439 Sorry, but... 249 00:29:38,543 --> 00:29:41,808 I can't stay on under these conditions. 250 00:29:41,913 --> 00:29:45,974 What's wrong? You don't like the house? 251 00:29:46,084 --> 00:29:47,779 The change of atmosphere? 252 00:29:49,254 --> 00:29:53,213 In my job, I get used to sleeping anywhere... 253 00:29:54,492 --> 00:29:56,483 but I need to get laid. 254 00:30:00,799 --> 00:30:05,896 Sure, we're shutting ourselves in here. 255 00:30:06,004 --> 00:30:09,269 But we didn't take a vow of chastity! 256 00:30:11,509 --> 00:30:15,036 Patience. We'll talk about it later. 257 00:30:15,146 --> 00:30:18,172 For now, let's think about breakfast, okay? 258 00:30:39,971 --> 00:30:42,269 A nice hot chocolate... 259 00:30:42,373 --> 00:30:44,000 around 11:00... 260 00:30:44,108 --> 00:30:47,305 whets the appetite for dinner. 261 00:30:47,412 --> 00:30:49,039 Who wrote that? 262 00:30:49,147 --> 00:30:50,774 Brillat-Savarin. 263 00:30:58,756 --> 00:31:00,587 What have we here? 264 00:31:01,793 --> 00:31:03,658 Kidneys Bourguignon. 265 00:31:06,397 --> 00:31:08,865 It's for me. 266 00:31:08,967 --> 00:31:10,832 Shit! That's typical. 267 00:31:12,170 --> 00:31:13,899 A beautiful theme. 268 00:31:15,540 --> 00:31:17,167 Very sexual. 269 00:31:50,642 --> 00:31:54,408 Actually, inviting girls... 270 00:31:54,512 --> 00:31:56,377 is a good idea. 271 00:32:02,787 --> 00:32:04,948 I like women too. 272 00:32:05,056 --> 00:32:07,923 I just think that on this occasion... 273 00:32:08,026 --> 00:32:10,085 we could have done without. 274 00:32:19,737 --> 00:32:22,001 I'm no party pooper. 275 00:32:22,106 --> 00:32:25,007 You should do a special menu. 276 00:32:27,612 --> 00:32:30,012 ''A dinner offered by... 277 00:32:30,114 --> 00:32:33,242 four Burgundian gentlemen... 278 00:32:33,351 --> 00:32:35,683 to three nice Canterbury whores! '' 279 00:32:36,688 --> 00:32:38,656 Ah, so they're whores, eh? 280 00:32:49,901 --> 00:32:51,926 What did you expect? 281 00:33:01,846 --> 00:33:03,871 I've got a great menu idea. 282 00:33:03,982 --> 00:33:05,745 ''The Whore Menu''! 283 00:33:08,052 --> 00:33:12,853 A saut� of fat and lean given by four gourmand gourmets, epicures... 284 00:33:12,957 --> 00:33:15,357 for three young ladies in twelve courses. 285 00:33:15,460 --> 00:33:17,018 That's it. 286 00:33:17,128 --> 00:33:20,791 Crayfish AAA la Mozart on a bed of rice AAA la Sully, with Sauce Aurora. 287 00:33:20,898 --> 00:33:22,160 Not bad. 288 00:33:39,650 --> 00:33:43,211 Can we see Boileau's linden tree? 289 00:33:43,321 --> 00:33:45,289 The one in the garden? 290 00:33:45,390 --> 00:33:46,857 Who sent you? 291 00:33:46,958 --> 00:33:48,516 The teacher. 292 00:33:48,626 --> 00:33:52,460 She wants to see Boileau's linden tree? 293 00:33:52,563 --> 00:33:56,055 Well, now, you tell her to come whenever she wants. 294 00:33:57,468 --> 00:33:59,163 Are you an Arab? 295 00:33:59,270 --> 00:34:01,932 No. Don't worry. I'm not an Arab. 296 00:34:02,040 --> 00:34:03,871 Listen, children. 297 00:34:03,975 --> 00:34:07,536 Do you see this tree? It's a linden tree. 298 00:34:07,645 --> 00:34:12,082 Mr. Boileau used to come sit under it. Who knows who he was? 299 00:34:13,751 --> 00:34:15,548 No, you don't. 300 00:34:15,653 --> 00:34:19,089 Boileau was a great French poet. 301 00:34:19,190 --> 00:34:22,250 He was born in 1636 and died in 1711. 302 00:34:22,360 --> 00:34:25,056 He wrote beautiful things. He loved nature. 303 00:34:25,163 --> 00:34:28,860 And so he came here to rest and wrote poems. 304 00:34:28,966 --> 00:34:33,801 ''Hasten then softly, and never lose heart. 305 00:34:33,905 --> 00:34:38,239 Twenty times on the loom, keep on weaving your art. '' 306 00:34:38,342 --> 00:34:40,207 Understand what it means? 307 00:34:42,447 --> 00:34:45,314 Mr. Bugatti was an artist... 308 00:34:45,416 --> 00:34:48,112 like a painter or a musician. 309 00:34:48,219 --> 00:34:50,449 This car is his art. 310 00:34:53,157 --> 00:34:54,954 Do you like cars? 311 00:35:06,804 --> 00:35:08,431 Want some? 312 00:35:17,548 --> 00:35:20,711 Sir, are you the chef? 313 00:35:20,818 --> 00:35:23,946 At your service. Eat, eat. 314 00:35:24,055 --> 00:35:28,116 - Smells good. - Yes, it's stuffing for the pullets. 315 00:35:28,226 --> 00:35:32,060 We're doing another stuffing for the suckling pigs. 316 00:35:36,067 --> 00:35:38,297 Know what they'll do with the fish? 317 00:35:38,402 --> 00:35:39,869 Eat them! 318 00:35:39,971 --> 00:35:43,805 My mean friends want to eat them all. 319 00:35:46,244 --> 00:35:48,303 For the pig, something simple. 320 00:35:48,412 --> 00:35:51,438 With the chestnuts, smoked bacon. 321 00:35:51,549 --> 00:35:53,346 Truffles. Beautiful, eh? 322 00:35:58,923 --> 00:36:00,652 Kidneys Bordelaise. 323 00:36:04,829 --> 00:36:07,389 Smells wonderful, but I'm having chocolate. 324 00:36:07,498 --> 00:36:10,467 Oh, but you've never heard of Roussel. 325 00:36:10,568 --> 00:36:12,763 He was a great writer. 326 00:36:12,870 --> 00:36:15,270 Little known, somewhat surrealist. 327 00:36:15,373 --> 00:36:17,841 He used to roll all three meals into one. 328 00:36:17,942 --> 00:36:22,140 He always began with hot chocolate and cream... 329 00:36:22,246 --> 00:36:26,706 and then something like Kidneys AAA la Bordelaise. 330 00:36:34,859 --> 00:36:37,123 It's easy to make. 331 00:36:48,639 --> 00:36:50,266 Wonderful! 332 00:36:55,913 --> 00:36:57,904 Well, I have to go now. 333 00:36:59,083 --> 00:37:00,573 Now? 334 00:37:01,752 --> 00:37:04,152 Tonight we're giving a little dinner. 335 00:37:04,255 --> 00:37:08,316 If you'd care to be our guest, we'd be delighted. 336 00:37:08,426 --> 00:37:12,021 I don't think Mlle. Andrea would be comfortable... 337 00:37:12,129 --> 00:37:14,461 with Marcello and Michel's guests. 338 00:37:14,565 --> 00:37:17,762 - Why not? - I'm not sure I can come. 339 00:37:17,868 --> 00:37:20,769 - She's a woman of the world. - Exactly. 340 00:37:26,777 --> 00:37:28,745 I don't know if I'll come. 341 00:37:31,349 --> 00:37:34,648 Marcello, the great pilot! 342 00:37:37,255 --> 00:37:40,281 Pleased to see you. Come this way. 343 00:37:40,391 --> 00:37:42,825 Come on. Come in. 344 00:37:53,838 --> 00:37:55,863 Take off your things. 345 00:37:58,009 --> 00:37:59,636 My friend Ugo. 346 00:38:08,352 --> 00:38:09,819 And you? 347 00:38:12,089 --> 00:38:14,990 - Do you like boas? - What about you? 348 00:38:17,461 --> 00:38:19,361 What a meringue! 349 00:38:20,798 --> 00:38:22,663 - And me? - Chocolate meringue. 350 00:38:26,937 --> 00:38:28,495 That's nice. 351 00:38:28,606 --> 00:38:32,007 - It's a farce. - What's a farce? 352 00:38:32,109 --> 00:38:36,045 The girls arrive, and everyone disappears! 353 00:38:36,147 --> 00:38:39,310 - Predictably. - Predictable to you. 354 00:38:39,417 --> 00:38:42,784 - Oh, listen. - I've had enough! 355 00:38:42,887 --> 00:38:46,084 Since we aren't eating, I'll give it to the fish! 356 00:38:47,391 --> 00:38:49,825 Eat, little fishies! Eat! 357 00:38:53,030 --> 00:38:54,861 Philippe is going crazy. 358 00:38:56,200 --> 00:38:59,067 Hello. My name is Michel. 359 00:39:01,672 --> 00:39:03,105 Very pretty. 360 00:39:08,679 --> 00:39:11,842 Ugo, time to go to the kitchen. 361 00:39:11,949 --> 00:39:14,247 Okay, go to the kitchen. 362 00:39:16,087 --> 00:39:18,988 You don't even look at me, a poor little orphan. 363 00:39:19,090 --> 00:39:21,422 Yes. Let's go to the kitchen. 364 00:39:23,994 --> 00:39:26,121 - You're the third? - Ladies and gentlemen! 365 00:39:26,230 --> 00:39:28,630 In the splendor of her flesh... 366 00:39:28,733 --> 00:39:30,257 Gita! 367 00:40:06,036 --> 00:40:08,163 Oh, you look great like that! 368 00:40:12,076 --> 00:40:15,443 What's the chicken doing in here? In an aquarium? 369 00:40:18,816 --> 00:40:20,408 Isn't that weird? 370 00:40:22,019 --> 00:40:23,714 It's a chicken-fish. 371 00:40:23,821 --> 00:40:25,652 Isn't France wonderful. 372 00:40:25,756 --> 00:40:27,451 You aren't French? 373 00:40:27,558 --> 00:40:29,822 There's my p�t�... 374 00:40:31,162 --> 00:40:34,154 charcoal-grilled turkey and the rest. 375 00:40:35,699 --> 00:40:37,792 Do you know how to cook? 376 00:40:37,902 --> 00:40:40,029 No. I'd rather eat. 377 00:40:50,481 --> 00:40:53,848 I don't know who you are, where you're from, but I like you. 378 00:41:02,560 --> 00:41:04,892 I decided to accept. 379 00:41:06,831 --> 00:41:08,856 How nice. 380 00:41:08,966 --> 00:41:11,093 You'll be in very good company. 381 00:41:15,406 --> 00:41:16,873 Come in! 382 00:41:24,181 --> 00:41:25,705 What broke? 383 00:41:26,884 --> 00:41:28,408 The carafe. 384 00:41:30,187 --> 00:41:32,052 Make yourself comfortable. 385 00:41:33,624 --> 00:41:36,354 The house is even stranger at night. 386 00:41:38,128 --> 00:41:40,426 I'll leave you with these ladies. 387 00:41:40,531 --> 00:41:42,328 You might play billiards. 388 00:41:45,402 --> 00:41:47,302 Do you play billiards? 389 00:41:51,575 --> 00:41:55,170 The mirage, the dream has become reality. 390 00:41:55,279 --> 00:41:56,712 A woman is here. 391 00:41:56,814 --> 00:41:58,839 - What woman? - The schoolteacher. 392 00:42:00,417 --> 00:42:02,146 You see? She came! 393 00:42:04,021 --> 00:42:06,182 No. We're getting away from all that! 394 00:42:06,290 --> 00:42:08,383 - Don't be shy. - Getting away from it. 395 00:42:08,492 --> 00:42:11,222 Inviting that poor girl with your whores! 396 00:42:11,328 --> 00:42:14,297 I'm going to bed. I leave you to your debauchery. 397 00:42:14,398 --> 00:42:16,559 She's no whore. She's a woman. 398 00:42:16,667 --> 00:42:18,191 The woman! 399 00:42:21,038 --> 00:42:22,903 Leaving, when I arrive? 400 00:42:23,007 --> 00:42:27,706 No, I was just going to the living room to see how things are. 401 00:42:29,713 --> 00:42:31,305 Oh! Beautiful cake! 402 00:42:34,885 --> 00:42:38,343 Yes. Ugo made it. He's a master pastry chef. 403 00:42:38,455 --> 00:42:41,083 We're all his assistants here. 404 00:42:42,459 --> 00:42:46,759 I was a bit embarrassed to see you arrive just now. 405 00:42:46,864 --> 00:42:50,027 They've invited three other girls that I don't know. 406 00:42:50,134 --> 00:42:52,694 Yes, I saw them. They seem very nice. 407 00:42:52,803 --> 00:42:54,395 Really? 408 00:42:54,505 --> 00:42:56,837 You don't mind dining with them? 409 00:42:56,941 --> 00:42:58,738 No. Why? 410 00:42:58,842 --> 00:43:00,434 Because... 411 00:43:00,544 --> 00:43:04,207 I suspect their morals may be a trifle free... 412 00:43:04,315 --> 00:43:06,044 a trifle loose. 413 00:43:06,150 --> 00:43:07,674 We'll see. 414 00:43:21,832 --> 00:43:26,394 Beautiful. A trifle melancholy. Let us say it's awful! 415 00:43:26,503 --> 00:43:27,970 She finds it awful. 416 00:43:28,072 --> 00:43:32,975 The ideal would be to go on eating like this, indefinitely. 417 00:43:33,077 --> 00:43:35,910 - What do you think? - Yes, it'd be magnificent! 418 00:43:36,013 --> 00:43:38,641 The quail for you, the rooster for me. 419 00:43:42,486 --> 00:43:44,784 I say a woman who likes food... 420 00:43:49,693 --> 00:43:51,718 Likes other things too. 421 00:43:53,764 --> 00:43:55,254 Pirate! 422 00:43:55,366 --> 00:43:57,857 Brigand! Excuse him. He's an airline pilot. 423 00:44:00,371 --> 00:44:02,430 At my command, Ugo! 424 00:44:06,443 --> 00:44:09,412 - Your hand is cold. - I have alabaster skin. 425 00:44:13,150 --> 00:44:14,845 Eat! 426 00:44:16,754 --> 00:44:19,780 Mortadella must be eaten in a sandwich. 427 00:44:19,890 --> 00:44:21,687 Aren't you hungry? 428 00:44:21,792 --> 00:44:23,760 I don't like to eat much. 429 00:44:25,162 --> 00:44:26,959 Worse luck for you. 430 00:44:27,064 --> 00:44:28,759 It looks that way. 431 00:44:31,735 --> 00:44:35,102 It isn't necessary to act like an animal. 432 00:44:35,205 --> 00:44:36,763 Italians abroad. 433 00:44:49,653 --> 00:44:52,986 I drink... I'm not sure to what, but... 434 00:44:53,090 --> 00:44:54,717 I drink. 435 00:45:16,346 --> 00:45:18,780 I've reflected on our morning's talk. 436 00:45:18,882 --> 00:45:23,012 I must say, I admire your pedagogic theories. 437 00:45:36,100 --> 00:45:38,830 Relax a little, for God's sake. 438 00:45:40,704 --> 00:45:43,400 This hair gets in my way! 439 00:45:43,507 --> 00:45:45,270 Are you okay? 440 00:45:45,375 --> 00:45:47,400 You okay, my love? 441 00:45:47,511 --> 00:45:49,638 Loosen your seat belts! 442 00:45:49,747 --> 00:45:52,238 Fasten or loosen them? 443 00:46:10,667 --> 00:46:12,635 Tasted the pullet? 444 00:46:13,771 --> 00:46:16,672 Now on to the pork. 445 00:46:25,315 --> 00:46:27,112 The banderillas! 446 00:47:04,555 --> 00:47:06,113 Marvelous night! 447 00:47:06,223 --> 00:47:08,020 Come in. Close the door! 448 00:47:12,529 --> 00:47:14,292 Take off your panties. 449 00:47:36,887 --> 00:47:38,684 Take off your coat. 450 00:47:46,797 --> 00:47:48,424 Do you like cars? 451 00:47:48,532 --> 00:47:50,295 Oh, yes, I adore them. 452 00:47:51,602 --> 00:47:53,399 What kind is it? 453 00:47:53,503 --> 00:47:55,095 A Bugatti. 454 00:47:58,575 --> 00:48:00,543 - Know what this is? - What's it for? 455 00:48:00,644 --> 00:48:02,475 A manifold. 456 00:48:03,780 --> 00:48:05,714 - Like it? - Very much. 457 00:48:12,623 --> 00:48:14,215 It's cold. 458 00:48:14,324 --> 00:48:16,758 Don't worry. It'll warm up. 459 00:48:16,860 --> 00:48:20,796 Come on. Like this. Are you happy? 460 00:48:20,898 --> 00:48:22,729 Like it hard like that? 461 00:48:37,848 --> 00:48:41,409 Wanting to be Marlon Brando is vanity. 462 00:48:48,859 --> 00:48:52,920 Besides, even Marlon Brando is a kind of epiphenomenon. 463 00:48:58,535 --> 00:49:01,163 - Very good! - ''Vanity of vanities. '' 464 00:49:11,348 --> 00:49:14,112 Ooh, Marlon, come here. 465 00:49:16,119 --> 00:49:17,780 Want some? 466 00:49:19,690 --> 00:49:21,521 It's really good. 467 00:49:23,193 --> 00:49:24,990 I really love it. 468 00:49:29,299 --> 00:49:32,427 My love. Oh, my love! 469 00:49:32,536 --> 00:49:34,299 How I love you. 470 00:49:36,840 --> 00:49:38,831 An old record from my youth. 471 00:49:39,710 --> 00:49:43,373 A very sensual melody, you'll see. 472 00:50:47,077 --> 00:50:50,877 Outside of food, all is epiphemomenal. 473 00:50:50,981 --> 00:50:55,418 Sand, beach, skiing, love, work... 474 00:50:55,519 --> 00:50:56,986 your bed... 475 00:50:57,087 --> 00:50:58,748 epiphenomena. 476 00:50:58,855 --> 00:51:00,720 Ecclesiastes says... 477 00:51:11,068 --> 00:51:12,535 Eat, my girl. 478 00:51:12,636 --> 00:51:14,263 Eat, bitch. 479 00:51:24,548 --> 00:51:26,709 Funny, I've never known a judge. 480 00:51:28,285 --> 00:51:30,412 Meting out justice... How exciting! 481 00:51:32,722 --> 00:51:36,522 It is more a case of applying the law... 482 00:51:36,626 --> 00:51:39,288 which is often quite different. 483 00:51:39,396 --> 00:51:41,626 What a beautiful thing to say. 484 00:51:44,201 --> 00:51:47,261 It's as if we're alone together... 485 00:51:47,370 --> 00:51:49,338 out in the country. 486 00:51:54,644 --> 00:51:56,271 Afraid of me? 487 00:51:57,681 --> 00:51:59,979 No. I'm missing two buttons. 488 00:52:04,121 --> 00:52:06,817 Oh, poor baby! 489 00:52:06,923 --> 00:52:10,120 - If you like, I can sew them on. - You know how? 490 00:52:10,227 --> 00:52:14,254 - That's very nice. - Come, my frightened little judge. 491 00:52:14,364 --> 00:52:16,423 Here, eat this. 492 00:52:16,533 --> 00:52:19,559 I don't know if I'll find the sewing things. 493 00:52:25,108 --> 00:52:29,272 Please, let's take a break and go up and have some fun. 494 00:52:31,148 --> 00:52:33,116 There's plenty of time. 495 00:52:33,216 --> 00:52:34,843 Later. Eat. Eat. 496 00:52:34,951 --> 00:52:36,942 All you do is eat! 497 00:52:44,027 --> 00:52:45,995 Don't worry. I won't prick you. 498 00:52:54,437 --> 00:52:56,769 Luckily, he's found a little homemaker. 499 00:52:57,974 --> 00:52:59,635 The poor baby. 500 00:53:44,120 --> 00:53:46,111 Excuse me. 501 00:53:46,223 --> 00:53:48,282 Excuse me, Mademoiselle. 502 00:53:48,391 --> 00:53:50,416 I mean, Andrea. 503 00:54:07,177 --> 00:54:09,372 Allow me to request... 504 00:54:09,479 --> 00:54:12,175 your hand formally in marriage. 505 00:54:12,282 --> 00:54:13,749 Please. 506 00:54:45,649 --> 00:54:47,276 Get up! 507 00:54:54,724 --> 00:54:57,921 My mother died when I was two, two and a half. 508 00:54:58,028 --> 00:55:00,519 My nurse raised me. That's her. 509 00:55:00,630 --> 00:55:02,530 - Poor Philippe. - Beautiful, eh? 510 00:55:02,632 --> 00:55:04,293 Very beautiful. 511 00:55:04,401 --> 00:55:06,335 A lovely face. 512 00:55:06,436 --> 00:55:08,961 Sorry. They're waiting downstairs. 513 00:55:09,072 --> 00:55:11,939 Don't you know how to knock? 514 00:55:14,477 --> 00:55:16,911 He's so stupid! 515 00:55:17,013 --> 00:55:21,211 Don't worry. We'll soon legitimize our situation. 516 00:55:26,489 --> 00:55:30,255 Ugo, you know my friend. She's marvelously gifted. 517 00:55:30,360 --> 00:55:32,157 I'll introduce you. 518 00:55:35,665 --> 00:55:40,125 On the operating table, the redhead dies. 519 00:55:40,236 --> 00:55:43,296 Woman's body, vanity. 520 00:55:50,680 --> 00:55:53,877 Woman's body is vanity. 521 00:56:04,694 --> 00:56:09,028 Gentlemen, I have an important announcement to make. 522 00:56:10,633 --> 00:56:12,191 Gentlemen, please. 523 00:56:14,971 --> 00:56:16,871 Mlle. Andrea and myself... 524 00:56:16,973 --> 00:56:18,907 have decided to marry. 525 00:56:43,032 --> 00:56:44,863 I'm leaving. 526 00:56:44,968 --> 00:56:47,061 I threw up all night. 527 00:56:48,838 --> 00:56:51,329 Figure out the money with Anna. 528 00:56:56,079 --> 00:56:57,546 Bye, sweetie. 529 00:57:01,818 --> 00:57:03,683 Bye, everybody! 530 00:57:40,557 --> 00:57:43,321 Michel, come to the table, please. 531 00:57:43,426 --> 00:57:46,520 I hate these rustic checkered curtains. 532 00:57:46,629 --> 00:57:48,597 We'll change them. No problem. 533 00:57:56,005 --> 00:57:59,964 So you shut yourselves in here every weekend to eat? 534 00:58:00,076 --> 00:58:03,102 No, just now and then. 535 00:58:04,647 --> 00:58:06,615 You eat this much each time? 536 00:58:08,084 --> 00:58:09,745 This is different. 537 00:58:40,016 --> 00:58:42,177 It'd go down better with salad. 538 00:58:42,285 --> 00:58:44,378 You know, dykes are right. 539 00:58:44,487 --> 00:58:47,888 Men are such a pain in the ass. 540 00:58:47,991 --> 00:58:50,858 What do we have to do to amuse you? 541 00:58:50,960 --> 00:58:53,292 Something else besides eat, eat, eat. 542 00:58:55,298 --> 00:58:58,961 - Play the pipes of Pan? - For example, yes! 543 00:59:23,092 --> 00:59:24,753 A pizza proven�ale. 544 00:59:26,362 --> 00:59:29,092 All the aroma of the moors. 545 00:59:29,198 --> 00:59:31,166 And the sparkle of your eyes. 546 00:59:36,839 --> 00:59:39,933 You're grotesque and disgusting! 547 00:59:40,043 --> 00:59:43,809 Why do you eat if you're not hungry? It's ridiculous! 548 01:00:02,198 --> 01:00:04,166 Michel is sick. He wants you. 549 01:00:04,267 --> 01:00:05,894 Okay, I'm coming. 550 01:00:22,485 --> 01:00:23,008 Ohhh, I'm sick. I'm sick! Don't be mean, Marcello. 551 01:00:27,790 --> 01:00:29,781 Easy, Marcello. 552 01:00:29,892 --> 01:00:31,985 Marcello, don't be mean. 553 01:00:34,130 --> 01:00:36,064 It's horrible! 554 01:00:36,165 --> 01:00:39,362 When I was little, my mother... 555 01:00:39,469 --> 01:00:42,199 My mother used to punish me terribly. 556 01:00:42,305 --> 01:00:46,935 This is the first time since I've been grown up. 557 01:00:47,043 --> 01:00:49,204 Cut the tragedy. Open up. 558 01:00:49,312 --> 01:00:51,109 Push! 559 01:00:51,214 --> 01:00:55,480 It will relieve the congestion. 560 01:00:55,585 --> 01:00:57,553 Push. Help. 561 01:01:15,138 --> 01:01:17,038 You don't chew enough. 562 01:01:33,289 --> 01:01:35,314 Some well pur�e. 563 01:01:35,425 --> 01:01:37,859 Good pur�e. It's the adjective. 564 01:01:37,960 --> 01:01:40,827 - This isn't the moment, Philippe. - Want some? 565 01:01:40,930 --> 01:01:45,924 To absorb the air. Michel, I made it especially for you. 566 01:01:47,070 --> 01:01:49,504 You're wrong, Michel. 567 01:01:49,605 --> 01:01:52,403 You should take a little, you know. 568 01:01:57,246 --> 01:01:59,578 Easy. The platter. 569 01:02:02,151 --> 01:02:05,279 - Care for a little? - Oh, yes, I adore pur�e. 570 01:02:09,292 --> 01:02:10,759 It isn't bad. 571 01:02:14,063 --> 01:02:15,997 It lacks butter, Ugo. 572 01:02:16,099 --> 01:02:18,761 It's meant to. 573 01:02:18,868 --> 01:02:21,234 - Why? - It's a medicinal pur�e. 574 01:02:35,651 --> 01:02:39,348 - They'll all croak! - Make an effort, Michel. 575 01:02:39,455 --> 01:02:41,548 It's a matter of will. 576 01:02:43,359 --> 01:02:47,295 Pretend you're a little Indian boy in Bombay... 577 01:02:47,396 --> 01:02:50,593 and you're hungry... very hungry. 578 01:02:50,700 --> 01:02:54,602 If you're very hungry, what do you do? You eat! 579 01:03:00,243 --> 01:03:01,642 Pretending? 580 01:03:05,047 --> 01:03:06,742 Well, then... 581 01:03:06,849 --> 01:03:08,749 eat some more. 582 01:03:19,695 --> 01:03:21,686 Eat some more, my pet. 583 01:03:25,301 --> 01:03:26,768 Eat! 584 01:03:28,171 --> 01:03:30,264 If you don't eat... 585 01:03:32,275 --> 01:03:34,402 you won't die. 586 01:03:40,817 --> 01:03:42,808 You've got to eat. 587 01:03:46,055 --> 01:03:49,718 I thought Philippe would be the first. 588 01:03:49,826 --> 01:03:51,691 The judge. 589 01:03:55,798 --> 01:03:57,265 They're crazy! 590 01:04:05,875 --> 01:04:09,333 Stay cool. Stay cool. 591 01:04:09,445 --> 01:04:12,312 If they want to commit suicide, let them. 592 01:04:12,415 --> 01:04:14,474 Come, Andrea. We're going. 593 01:04:14,584 --> 01:04:16,575 Coming with us? 594 01:04:27,330 --> 01:04:29,730 All four of them are imbeciles... 595 01:04:29,832 --> 01:04:31,823 idiots, mental deficients! 596 01:04:38,808 --> 01:04:42,676 You're wasting your time. Leave too! 597 01:04:44,647 --> 01:04:46,114 No. 598 01:04:47,250 --> 01:04:48,842 I'm staying. 599 01:04:49,552 --> 01:04:51,918 What a tableau! Marvelous! 600 01:04:52,021 --> 01:04:54,114 A Sterlini still-life. 601 01:04:55,591 --> 01:04:57,559 A friend of mine. 602 01:04:58,694 --> 01:05:00,662 A great painter. 603 01:05:01,797 --> 01:05:05,426 I'm not sure the starches are good... 604 01:05:05,534 --> 01:05:07,525 for my gas. 605 01:05:08,738 --> 01:05:10,399 I'm hungry! 606 01:05:12,808 --> 01:05:14,799 This will do you good. 607 01:05:35,965 --> 01:05:37,432 My name! 608 01:05:41,771 --> 01:05:46,708 It was a very delicate idea of Ugo's. Very nice. 609 01:05:50,179 --> 01:05:52,010 It looks good.