1 00:00:29,271 --> 00:00:34,063 City by the mighty dirty river 2 00:00:34,900 --> 00:00:40,109 City by the greasy rolling sea 3 00:00:40,782 --> 00:00:43,617 I crawl so small 4 00:00:44,202 --> 00:00:48,412 And it stands so tall 5 00:00:48,998 --> 00:00:52,747 And it all belongs 6 00:00:53,127 --> 00:00:55,831 To me 7 00:00:58,548 --> 00:01:00,920 Welcome to Joe's apartment 8 00:01:01,009 --> 00:01:03,759 It's our apartment, too 9 00:01:03,845 --> 00:01:06,217 We've been around for a hundred million years 10 00:01:06,305 --> 00:01:08,762 And we'll be here long after you 11 00:01:11,435 --> 00:01:14,057 Let's go to our place It's a great big space 12 00:01:14,147 --> 00:01:16,816 It's where I wanna be 13 00:01:16,899 --> 00:01:19,686 Where friends all meet And life is sweet 14 00:01:19,777 --> 00:01:22,104 'Cause everything's for free 15 00:01:22,198 --> 00:01:24,949 It's the joint, it's a gas 16 00:01:25,034 --> 00:01:27,522 It's a big fat boot in the ass 17 00:01:27,993 --> 00:01:30,744 Let's toast! Raise your glass 18 00:01:30,829 --> 00:01:36,949 Here's to Joe! A man with class 19 00:01:37,293 --> 00:01:41,208 So! Hello from Joe's apartment 20 00:01:41,297 --> 00:01:44,214 You're gonna love the view 21 00:01:44,466 --> 00:01:47,173 It's a nest that beats the rest 22 00:01:47,262 --> 00:01:50,132 We're so glad that you're our guest 23 00:01:50,222 --> 00:01:53,674 Come on in, we're all undressed 24 00:01:53,934 --> 00:02:00,185 Joe's apartment, we welcome you! 25 00:02:01,943 --> 00:02:03,436 Nice singing! 26 00:02:05,029 --> 00:02:06,606 The movie's starting. 27 00:02:34,097 --> 00:02:37,263 Dear Mom, I made it to New York safe and sound. 28 00:02:37,350 --> 00:02:39,094 Hands up, pinhead! 29 00:02:55,703 --> 00:02:57,990 Dear Mom, I made it to New York. 30 00:02:58,078 --> 00:02:59,823 Hands up, pinhead! 31 00:03:09,131 --> 00:03:10,162 Dear Mom-- 32 00:03:10,257 --> 00:03:12,000 Hands up, pinhead! 33 00:03:12,217 --> 00:03:13,248 Please send money. 34 00:03:33,654 --> 00:03:36,858 Don 't worry, Mom, I'll pay you back soon. I'm bound to get a job. 35 00:03:36,950 --> 00:03:38,943 I'm a college graduate. 36 00:03:41,370 --> 00:03:44,786 But first things first. I got to get an apartment. 37 00:03:44,915 --> 00:03:47,205 I hope I can get one really cheap. 38 00:03:47,418 --> 00:03:49,410 $1,500 a month? 39 00:03:50,128 --> 00:03:52,453 There's a hole in the ceiling. 40 00:03:52,839 --> 00:03:54,797 It's a private atrium. 41 00:03:58,554 --> 00:04:02,005 $1,100 a month for 300 square feet. 42 00:04:02,266 --> 00:04:04,138 That's a sweet deal. 43 00:04:05,517 --> 00:04:06,631 No vacancy. 44 00:04:06,726 --> 00:04:07,971 $1,500 a month. 45 00:04:08,061 --> 00:04:09,972 Nothing for that price range. 46 00:04:10,940 --> 00:04:12,434 Try Nebraska. 47 00:04:31,627 --> 00:04:34,378 Oh, my God, mister. Are you all right? 48 00:04:39,341 --> 00:04:43,719 Two days, seven hours, twenty-three minutes and four seconds. 49 00:04:44,806 --> 00:04:47,177 That's how long I've been lying here. 50 00:04:48,809 --> 00:04:50,302 Are you okay? 51 00:04:52,020 --> 00:04:54,974 Of course not. I'm an artist. 52 00:04:59,862 --> 00:05:03,444 I wanted to express how cold, how pitiless this city really is. 53 00:05:03,531 --> 00:05:05,570 Nobody touched you for two days? 54 00:05:05,658 --> 00:05:07,366 Spitting doesn't count. 55 00:05:09,080 --> 00:05:11,368 You must be from out of town. 56 00:05:11,666 --> 00:05:12,779 Yeah. 57 00:05:13,791 --> 00:05:14,990 Iowa. 58 00:05:16,252 --> 00:05:18,659 -What's your name? -Joe. 59 00:05:18,921 --> 00:05:20,747 Walter. Walter Shit. 60 00:05:21,715 --> 00:05:23,174 Walter Shit? 61 00:05:23,843 --> 00:05:24,839 Yeah. 62 00:05:25,929 --> 00:05:27,090 Yeah. 63 00:05:30,057 --> 00:05:31,884 Looking for a place? 64 00:05:32,142 --> 00:05:34,052 Something for $100 a month. 65 00:05:37,272 --> 00:05:42,148 Hey, junior here thinks he's going to find his own rent-controlled apartment! 66 00:05:47,657 --> 00:05:49,530 Rent-controlled apartment? 67 00:05:49,617 --> 00:05:50,732 Yeah. 68 00:05:50,827 --> 00:05:54,695 A place where the rent's been frozen since the 1950s. 69 00:05:55,124 --> 00:05:57,958 Those places are hard to find because no one ever leaves them. 70 00:05:58,042 --> 00:06:01,375 Not unless the landlord gives them a little help. 71 00:06:53,136 --> 00:06:55,175 I love the real estate business. 72 00:07:09,610 --> 00:07:11,402 They're tougher than they look. 73 00:07:11,487 --> 00:07:15,151 See? There's really no way to get a rent-controlled apartment. 74 00:07:15,240 --> 00:07:16,402 No way at all? 75 00:07:16,490 --> 00:07:19,446 I mean, only if it's your mom's apartment... 76 00:07:19,537 --> 00:07:20,995 and she croaks. 77 00:07:21,455 --> 00:07:23,447 How you doing, Mrs. Grotowski? 78 00:07:28,044 --> 00:07:29,455 Oh, my God! 79 00:07:32,507 --> 00:07:36,255 Joe, Mrs. Grotowski doesn't have any family. 80 00:07:36,803 --> 00:07:39,672 You pose as her son, take her apartment. 81 00:07:39,972 --> 00:07:41,087 What? 82 00:07:41,515 --> 00:07:43,258 I couldn't! 83 00:07:45,394 --> 00:07:47,138 Oh, my God! 84 00:07:47,479 --> 00:07:48,594 Joe! 85 00:07:50,315 --> 00:07:52,307 It's your mother! 86 00:07:53,901 --> 00:07:56,227 And she's dead! 87 00:07:59,908 --> 00:08:01,070 Thank you. 88 00:08:06,957 --> 00:08:08,534 My first place! 89 00:08:22,345 --> 00:08:23,508 Quiet! 90 00:08:23,597 --> 00:08:25,341 Got to hide! Got to hide! 91 00:08:25,433 --> 00:08:28,350 -Never seen him around before. -Where's the old lady? 92 00:08:28,435 --> 00:08:31,270 -Luggage! I don't like it! -Stay undercover. 93 00:08:31,355 --> 00:08:32,933 Right, another stupid human. 94 00:08:33,023 --> 00:08:34,980 -Shut up! -Can it, both of you. 95 00:08:41,906 --> 00:08:43,187 Oh, no! 96 00:08:46,119 --> 00:08:47,992 Yummy, yummy! 97 00:08:55,002 --> 00:08:57,707 Damn. Ralph's out there. Poor sucker. 98 00:09:06,262 --> 00:09:10,259 This is the greasiest, ugliest bug I've ever seen in my life. 99 00:09:17,440 --> 00:09:19,765 -Look at that. -Our kind of guy. 100 00:09:19,859 --> 00:09:21,850 He likes good living. That's for sure. 101 00:09:21,943 --> 00:09:24,268 -He's not so bad. -He's got potential. 102 00:09:25,573 --> 00:09:28,692 Did you hear that? "Greasy." Nice compliment. 103 00:09:29,076 --> 00:09:30,903 I thought you was smushed for sure. 104 00:09:30,995 --> 00:09:32,323 Who's out there? 105 00:09:32,413 --> 00:09:34,701 Schlomo and Pauli, who else? 106 00:09:35,248 --> 00:09:38,866 -Schlomo, I quit drinking. -Me, too, Pauli. 107 00:09:38,960 --> 00:09:42,875 Ever since I joined this health club. It's a great lap pool. 108 00:09:43,632 --> 00:09:45,209 Diver down. 109 00:09:46,134 --> 00:09:47,759 We're gonna get drunk. 110 00:09:47,844 --> 00:09:51,544 Hold on. He's having a taste of Old Hound Dog instead. 111 00:09:51,639 --> 00:09:53,465 I'll drink to that. 112 00:10:09,237 --> 00:10:13,071 I can't tell you how happy I am to be finally out on my own, Mom. 113 00:10:13,244 --> 00:10:15,071 No, no thanks, Mom. 114 00:10:15,163 --> 00:10:18,365 I can find a job by myself. Look how easy I got a place. 115 00:10:19,624 --> 00:10:20,952 Yes, Mom. 116 00:10:21,167 --> 00:10:24,251 No, Mom. Right, Mom. Good, Mom. 117 00:10:24,795 --> 00:10:27,335 Isn't his mom supposed to be dead? 118 00:10:29,010 --> 00:10:30,383 Landlord! 119 00:10:39,268 --> 00:10:42,019 I hope everything's going fine up in heaven, Mom. 120 00:10:42,104 --> 00:10:44,677 Pray to you later. Amen! 121 00:10:44,773 --> 00:10:47,062 Joe, who are you talking to? 122 00:10:52,195 --> 00:10:53,820 Who the hell are you? 123 00:10:54,616 --> 00:10:56,739 Joe Grotowski. 124 00:10:57,493 --> 00:10:59,651 Joe F. Grotowski. 125 00:11:00,538 --> 00:11:02,198 Vladimir Bianco. 126 00:11:02,790 --> 00:11:04,498 My cousin, Jesus. 127 00:11:05,459 --> 00:11:07,416 Vlad and Jesus Bianco? 128 00:11:07,919 --> 00:11:09,581 You are related? 129 00:11:10,047 --> 00:11:12,337 Speaking of relations, I knew your old lady... 130 00:11:12,426 --> 00:11:15,093 and she never talked you up! Not once! 131 00:11:15,177 --> 00:11:17,928 -I've been away at college. -ls that so? 132 00:11:18,013 --> 00:11:20,635 Well, $50 rent, college boy. 133 00:11:20,891 --> 00:11:23,049 -Cash! -Now! 134 00:11:27,272 --> 00:11:29,348 Sorry about your moms, man. 135 00:11:29,441 --> 00:11:32,227 But maybe you won't be missing her long. 136 00:11:33,486 --> 00:11:34,814 Amen. 137 00:11:44,914 --> 00:11:48,116 Dear Mom, thanks for another loan. 138 00:11:48,750 --> 00:11:50,576 I haven 't found a job yet... 139 00:11:50,668 --> 00:11:53,291 but I'm on the lookout for something good. 140 00:12:36,463 --> 00:12:38,585 Thank you for calling 91 1. 141 00:12:38,673 --> 00:12:42,292 Your call is important to us. Please stay on the line. 142 00:12:42,511 --> 00:12:46,341 Your local police precinct will be with you shortly. 143 00:12:53,562 --> 00:12:55,686 Central Complaint Department, please hold. 144 00:12:55,773 --> 00:12:57,896 I don't know. Please hold. 145 00:12:58,859 --> 00:13:01,065 I can't help you. Please hold. 146 00:13:01,152 --> 00:13:03,691 Like, who cares, man? Please hold. 147 00:13:03,822 --> 00:13:07,605 Alligators in the subway. Interesting, ma'am. Please hold. 148 00:13:09,160 --> 00:13:13,372 No, sir. Don't try to saw it off yourself. Please hold. 149 00:13:17,085 --> 00:13:21,378 -Central Complaint Department. -I'm calling from 324 1/2 East 8th Street. 150 00:13:22,215 --> 00:13:25,749 No water, no heat, no power. 151 00:13:26,343 --> 00:13:28,917 Roof leaking, drug dealing. 152 00:13:29,013 --> 00:13:31,338 People falling out of windows? 153 00:13:32,600 --> 00:13:36,182 Congratulations, sir. This is the worst call I've had all day! 154 00:13:36,269 --> 00:13:37,349 Really? 155 00:13:42,734 --> 00:13:44,690 Coffee break! 156 00:13:46,529 --> 00:13:48,024 Please hold. 157 00:13:49,825 --> 00:13:51,022 Hello? 158 00:14:04,965 --> 00:14:06,375 Lily, what's up? 159 00:14:06,465 --> 00:14:08,292 Oh, Blank. Hey. 160 00:14:09,384 --> 00:14:12,884 This garden of yours is really coming along. 161 00:14:13,013 --> 00:14:16,381 -Quite a change from the old air shaft. -Oh, yeah. 162 00:14:16,891 --> 00:14:19,809 It's such a relief after all those calls. 163 00:14:23,232 --> 00:14:24,855 It ain't bad now. 164 00:14:24,940 --> 00:14:27,561 Wait till there's a riot or a fire! 165 00:14:28,486 --> 00:14:29,946 Serious O.T. 166 00:14:30,072 --> 00:14:34,116 I wish we could do something other than put people on hold. 167 00:14:34,783 --> 00:14:38,198 What are you doing in this dead-end city department anyway? 168 00:14:38,286 --> 00:14:40,325 Child, go work for your dad. 169 00:14:40,412 --> 00:14:42,869 The man's a U.S. senator. 170 00:14:43,416 --> 00:14:46,667 Wear a nice dress, sit next to his podium. 171 00:14:46,837 --> 00:14:50,170 You could get into politics, easy. 172 00:15:05,896 --> 00:15:08,268 -Mr. Bianco. -Check it out. 173 00:15:08,357 --> 00:15:11,108 Please, Senator, just call me Alberto. 174 00:15:11,193 --> 00:15:13,815 Have you brought me good news, Alberto? 175 00:15:13,905 --> 00:15:17,819 My second to the last tenant has just taken flight, Senator. 176 00:15:18,159 --> 00:15:20,317 We two saw her off personally. 177 00:15:20,411 --> 00:15:23,659 Wonderful. She'll love the condo you bought her. 178 00:15:23,912 --> 00:15:26,533 Nothing is too good for my tenants. 179 00:15:26,873 --> 00:15:28,584 And how about your last tenant? 180 00:15:28,669 --> 00:15:31,040 We made his final arrangements. 181 00:15:32,339 --> 00:15:34,580 And soon the building will be yours. 182 00:15:34,883 --> 00:15:38,749 The U.S. government will have acquired the last property we need... 183 00:15:39,804 --> 00:15:41,381 for the brand new... 184 00:15:42,391 --> 00:15:43,590 Manhattan... 185 00:15:44,601 --> 00:15:46,391 maximum security... 186 00:15:46,477 --> 00:15:48,268 federal penitentiary. 187 00:15:50,648 --> 00:15:53,055 The biggest prison in the world. 188 00:15:55,443 --> 00:15:58,066 Whatever happened to the Lower East Side? 189 00:15:58,655 --> 00:16:00,613 How did it decay so badly... 190 00:16:01,200 --> 00:16:04,153 that the only thing that'll sprout in its soil... 191 00:16:04,244 --> 00:16:05,323 is a jail? 192 00:16:05,412 --> 00:16:07,737 We can't take all the credit for that. 193 00:16:07,830 --> 00:16:10,035 But we're glad we could help. 194 00:16:20,633 --> 00:16:22,674 Oh, look at those kids. 195 00:16:23,011 --> 00:16:25,468 They could get hurt, playing in this empty lot. 196 00:16:25,556 --> 00:16:28,474 I used to get plenty of cuts and scratches... 197 00:16:28,559 --> 00:16:31,051 but that's all there is around here. 198 00:16:32,854 --> 00:16:34,183 Hi, guys. 199 00:16:34,690 --> 00:16:36,183 What are you making? 200 00:16:36,273 --> 00:16:37,768 A crack house. 201 00:16:40,362 --> 00:16:41,821 Oh, my God. 202 00:16:42,489 --> 00:16:43,864 This is awful. 203 00:16:43,949 --> 00:16:47,281 This should be a public garden, with safe places for kids to play... 204 00:16:47,368 --> 00:16:48,827 with flowers and trees. 205 00:16:48,912 --> 00:16:52,363 Lily, this ain't no cute little building atrium. 206 00:16:52,539 --> 00:16:55,030 This is the nastiest neighborhood in New York City. 207 00:16:55,876 --> 00:16:57,417 Come on, girl. 208 00:17:36,248 --> 00:17:38,537 -Conference. -What's up, Ralph? 209 00:17:38,626 --> 00:17:42,954 This new guy, Joe. He don't wash, clean, vacuum. He don't give a crap. 210 00:17:43,046 --> 00:17:45,797 He's the dirtiest slob on the planet. 211 00:17:46,508 --> 00:17:48,547 I think I'm in love. 212 00:17:48,968 --> 00:17:50,877 -Me, too, Ralph. -I vote we keep him. 213 00:17:50,970 --> 00:17:52,595 We got to break him in, that's all. 214 00:17:55,975 --> 00:17:57,434 Oh, my gosh! 215 00:18:08,279 --> 00:18:11,482 Looks like the landlord wants to change Joe's lease. 216 00:18:11,573 --> 00:18:13,282 They aren't doing no paint job. 217 00:18:15,535 --> 00:18:19,485 Let's not kid ourselves. If Joe gets greased, we're next. 218 00:18:19,581 --> 00:18:23,579 I won't stand for it! Let's teach them toe-heads some respect! 219 00:18:25,335 --> 00:18:27,245 Roaches to the rescue! 220 00:18:27,671 --> 00:18:30,210 I love the smell of this old couch. 221 00:18:30,300 --> 00:18:32,505 -Double time! Double time! -Hang on! 222 00:18:32,592 --> 00:18:35,167 Hurry! These goons will bust Joe's skull! 223 00:18:35,513 --> 00:18:36,592 He knows it, too. 224 00:18:36,681 --> 00:18:38,888 -Feel him shaking? -Spring is in the air. 225 00:18:38,975 --> 00:18:41,382 -Stay cool, Joe. -Take it easy, Joe. 226 00:18:41,477 --> 00:18:44,015 Don't worry, Joe. We got your back. 227 00:18:44,105 --> 00:18:45,185 Who.... 228 00:18:48,733 --> 00:18:50,691 Where is he? 229 00:19:08,711 --> 00:19:11,795 -Troops! Antennas up! -Sir, yes, sir! 230 00:19:12,756 --> 00:19:14,381 Bombs away! 231 00:19:16,342 --> 00:19:18,218 Give me a kiss, asshole. 232 00:19:19,471 --> 00:19:21,131 God, they talk? 233 00:19:21,431 --> 00:19:24,681 That's right! I'm about to kick your ass, too! 234 00:19:25,185 --> 00:19:26,845 Disgusting little.... 235 00:19:27,103 --> 00:19:30,139 Your mama's cooking sucks! I wouldn't even touch it. 236 00:19:38,364 --> 00:19:40,690 I think he got me! He got me! 237 00:19:40,825 --> 00:19:44,028 I'm heading up to that big Dumpster in the sky. 238 00:19:44,579 --> 00:19:46,155 You missed! 239 00:19:56,463 --> 00:19:58,622 Over here, fruitcake. 240 00:20:00,845 --> 00:20:02,256 Let's go! 241 00:20:04,806 --> 00:20:06,882 It's a roach clip. Get it? 242 00:20:11,520 --> 00:20:13,478 Now you're in trouble! 243 00:20:15,191 --> 00:20:17,435 Ought to stomp your freaking head! 244 00:20:23,407 --> 00:20:26,076 Slip on something more comfortable. 245 00:20:28,120 --> 00:20:31,703 Hiya, Hansel and Gretel, lay off our buddy Joe. 246 00:20:32,958 --> 00:20:35,993 -Okay. Just let us go, please! -Are you listening? 247 00:20:36,085 --> 00:20:39,703 Because if you ain't, you'll get a roach in every meal you'll ever have... 248 00:20:39,797 --> 00:20:41,836 for the rest of your freaking life! 249 00:20:41,924 --> 00:20:43,749 -You got that? -Yeah! 250 00:20:43,841 --> 00:20:45,551 We know where you live! 251 00:20:45,887 --> 00:20:48,093 We live where you live. 252 00:20:58,858 --> 00:21:00,567 -What a fall! -Leaving so soon? 253 00:21:00,652 --> 00:21:02,976 -The party's just started! -See you. 254 00:21:03,070 --> 00:21:04,564 Hate to be you! 255 00:21:11,035 --> 00:21:13,194 -A spare! -You was robbed! 256 00:21:14,415 --> 00:21:17,948 You was great, Ralphie. What a couple of pansies. 257 00:21:18,042 --> 00:21:20,081 Joe, are you all right? 258 00:21:21,671 --> 00:21:22,786 Get back! 259 00:21:22,881 --> 00:21:24,374 -Joe. -Buddy! 260 00:21:24,465 --> 00:21:28,332 -That ain't no way to treat your friends. -My friends? 261 00:21:28,427 --> 00:21:33,173 Sure! We like the way you run things here, so we wanted to keep you around. 262 00:21:35,433 --> 00:21:36,928 You can talk. 263 00:21:37,102 --> 00:21:39,640 Talk? We can sing! 264 00:21:42,023 --> 00:21:43,767 Garbage 265 00:21:43,859 --> 00:21:46,564 Garbage 266 00:21:46,696 --> 00:21:49,860 Garbage 267 00:21:50,448 --> 00:21:51,527 Sorry. 268 00:21:52,075 --> 00:21:54,744 The garbage in the moonlight 269 00:21:54,827 --> 00:21:57,948 Gives off a lovely smell 270 00:21:58,080 --> 00:22:00,618 Sipping sewage with my baby 271 00:22:00,708 --> 00:22:03,282 In our little roach motel 272 00:22:03,378 --> 00:22:07,076 Please, don 't tell 273 00:22:18,933 --> 00:22:23,511 On an ocean trip on a garbage ship With a cockroach I adore 274 00:22:23,604 --> 00:22:28,481 We 'll take a taste of the medical waste That washes up on shore 275 00:22:28,569 --> 00:22:31,025 Oh, sweetheart, say you love me 276 00:22:31,113 --> 00:22:33,863 And crawl underneath my rug 277 00:22:33,948 --> 00:22:37,566 You're one in a thousand billion, baby 278 00:22:37,660 --> 00:22:42,286 Oh, won 't you be my bug? 279 00:22:42,415 --> 00:22:45,285 Oh, won 't you be my bug? 280 00:22:45,376 --> 00:22:50,121 Please, be my bug 281 00:23:08,815 --> 00:23:10,724 God, what a nightmare. 282 00:23:32,253 --> 00:23:34,330 I'm up. I'm up already. 283 00:23:54,983 --> 00:23:57,984 -What's that? -I'm trying to get some shuteye here. 284 00:23:58,445 --> 00:24:00,652 Morning. My name's Ralph Roach. 285 00:24:00,740 --> 00:24:02,531 This is my associate, Rodney Roach. 286 00:24:02,616 --> 00:24:04,239 What's happening, Joe? 287 00:24:05,494 --> 00:24:07,534 Another hot and muggy, Joe? 288 00:24:07,662 --> 00:24:10,829 -What are you doing on my breakfast? -Little nosh, that's all. 289 00:24:10,915 --> 00:24:13,406 -How's it hanging today? -Word up. 290 00:24:14,252 --> 00:24:16,291 How do you like the Knicks? 291 00:24:16,462 --> 00:24:17,921 How many of you are there? 292 00:24:18,006 --> 00:24:22,051 This apartment? Not a lot. About 20,000, 30,000, 40,000. 293 00:24:22,176 --> 00:24:24,050 Mostly family, you know. 294 00:24:24,137 --> 00:24:25,762 -And you can talk? -Sure. 295 00:24:25,846 --> 00:24:28,632 We just don't talk much. Not to people, anyhow. 296 00:24:28,723 --> 00:24:31,974 No point. People smush first, and ask questions later. 297 00:24:32,060 --> 00:24:34,469 But not you, brother. You're different. 298 00:24:34,814 --> 00:24:36,272 Oh, yeah? 299 00:24:44,863 --> 00:24:46,276 Joe, Joe! 300 00:24:46,366 --> 00:24:49,533 Let's be friends. We just saved your life, remember? 301 00:24:49,619 --> 00:24:50,865 Besides, Joe... 302 00:24:50,955 --> 00:24:54,654 if those two friends of yours come back, we might come in useful. 303 00:24:54,749 --> 00:24:58,083 So, how about a live-and-let-live philosophy here? 304 00:24:59,169 --> 00:25:01,292 "Slobs of a feather swarm together." 305 00:25:01,380 --> 00:25:03,207 -Makes sense to me. -That's fair. 306 00:25:03,299 --> 00:25:05,091 -What's yours is ours. -Stereo rights? 307 00:25:05,176 --> 00:25:07,049 Just warn us before you flush. 308 00:25:07,136 --> 00:25:08,879 I got to get out of here. 309 00:25:11,139 --> 00:25:13,889 -Where are you going? -None of your business. 310 00:25:13,974 --> 00:25:16,892 -Mind if we hang out with you? -Yes! 311 00:25:17,729 --> 00:25:19,521 -Come on! -Don't be that way, Joey! 312 00:25:19,606 --> 00:25:20,720 Can't we? Please? 313 00:25:20,815 --> 00:25:23,271 -You won't even notice us. -We'll be good. 314 00:25:23,360 --> 00:25:24,557 What's up his butt? 315 00:25:24,651 --> 00:25:28,981 We ought to keep an eye on him, in case he needs our help. 316 00:25:29,073 --> 00:25:31,825 -Right as usual, Ralph. -Excellent idea, Ralph. 317 00:25:59,016 --> 00:26:00,297 Ritardo's! 318 00:26:01,729 --> 00:26:04,138 Come on in. The cheese is fine. 319 00:26:05,149 --> 00:26:06,643 You're fired! 320 00:26:07,359 --> 00:26:09,767 Here are your enlargements, sir. 321 00:26:13,115 --> 00:26:14,525 You're fired! 322 00:26:15,325 --> 00:26:16,405 You're fired! 323 00:26:18,288 --> 00:26:20,160 -You're fired! -You're fired! 324 00:26:24,375 --> 00:26:26,996 Poor Joe. Having trouble keeping a job. 325 00:26:27,128 --> 00:26:28,753 We're doing our best to help. 326 00:26:28,838 --> 00:26:30,877 Guess we got to keep on trying. 327 00:26:32,425 --> 00:26:35,924 -Love this guy! Breakfast? -Don't mind if I do. 328 00:26:39,932 --> 00:26:43,097 -Don't panic or nothing. -What do you mean? 329 00:26:43,184 --> 00:26:45,177 Well, it appears to me... 330 00:26:45,270 --> 00:26:49,220 that one of our most dreaded natural enemies somehow got in! 331 00:26:49,816 --> 00:26:50,896 Oh, my God! 332 00:26:50,985 --> 00:26:53,392 Joe, wake up! A cat! 333 00:26:56,864 --> 00:26:58,739 Don't let it get me! 334 00:27:04,748 --> 00:27:06,739 How's everybody doing tonight? 335 00:27:09,168 --> 00:27:11,161 Thank you! Good-looking crowd. 336 00:27:11,671 --> 00:27:13,628 Anybody here from New Jersey? 337 00:27:14,131 --> 00:27:15,507 What exit? 338 00:27:16,008 --> 00:27:17,254 He's dying out there. 339 00:27:17,344 --> 00:27:20,130 Some pretty cool cats from there: Sinatra, Bruce. 340 00:27:20,221 --> 00:27:22,426 Say, nice set of whiskers, sir. 341 00:27:23,348 --> 00:27:25,506 Poor Ralphie. I can't look! 342 00:27:29,269 --> 00:27:31,429 It's Cousin Tiny from Texas! 343 00:27:31,523 --> 00:27:34,228 Howdy, cousins! Just buzzing through! 344 00:27:34,318 --> 00:27:37,234 Let's have ourselves a little rodeo! 345 00:27:47,122 --> 00:27:49,079 It's chicken-pickin ', finger-lickin ' good 346 00:27:49,166 --> 00:27:50,908 I got my honey in a sunny neighborhood 347 00:27:50,999 --> 00:27:52,957 It's a wrassling, hassling, dazzling show 348 00:27:53,044 --> 00:27:56,579 Grab a lady and do-si-do A little bitty kitty-cat rodeo 349 00:28:12,812 --> 00:28:14,519 Scrape it, Clyde! 350 00:28:15,606 --> 00:28:18,311 Now you ought to bring your daughter 'cause it's hotter 351 00:28:18,401 --> 00:28:20,856 When he's shaking and a-baking and breaking it in 352 00:28:20,944 --> 00:28:23,316 He's a-gripping, he's a-slipping 353 00:28:23,780 --> 00:28:27,114 Come on, mister, bring your sister Bring her to the rodeo 354 00:28:28,869 --> 00:28:30,150 Go, Joe! 355 00:28:30,246 --> 00:28:32,239 -Go, Joe! -Attaboy, Joe! 356 00:28:33,500 --> 00:28:37,413 -Look at those claws digging into his face! -That's got to hurt! 357 00:28:40,590 --> 00:28:42,665 Good arm, Joe! Good arm! 358 00:28:47,929 --> 00:28:49,968 You saved my life! 359 00:28:50,348 --> 00:28:54,298 No human being has ever saved the life of a cockroach. 360 00:28:56,187 --> 00:29:00,099 This is a breakthrough in "interspecio" diplomacy! 361 00:29:00,773 --> 00:29:03,977 Yeah? Well, stop following me to work already! 362 00:29:04,069 --> 00:29:06,477 -For God's sake! -You got it, Joe. 363 00:29:06,572 --> 00:29:08,481 -Forget about it. -Don't worry. 364 00:29:08,574 --> 00:29:10,531 We don't follow you to work no more. 365 00:29:10,617 --> 00:29:13,025 Yeah, right. I've heard that before. 366 00:29:14,287 --> 00:29:17,622 Give me a "J"! Give me an "O"! An "E"! 367 00:29:17,708 --> 00:29:19,747 -What's that spell? -Joe! 368 00:29:20,002 --> 00:29:22,208 -What's that spell? -Joe! 369 00:29:22,838 --> 00:29:27,084 Dear Mom, the job situation has been a little tricky. 370 00:29:27,717 --> 00:29:30,837 But I know I'm going to land something soon. 371 00:29:36,726 --> 00:29:38,268 Congratulate me. 372 00:29:38,353 --> 00:29:40,973 This is the first of my works to use paint! 373 00:29:41,813 --> 00:29:44,599 I call this piece lnstant Minority. 374 00:29:45,316 --> 00:29:46,941 I did the whole block. 375 00:29:47,527 --> 00:29:50,278 But people are black or white or brown. 376 00:29:50,363 --> 00:29:52,023 Nobody's purple! 377 00:29:54,159 --> 00:29:55,618 Periwinkle! 378 00:29:55,786 --> 00:29:58,738 You're now the world's smallest minority. 379 00:29:58,829 --> 00:30:01,582 How am I supposed to get a job looking like this? 380 00:30:01,665 --> 00:30:03,458 -You know how to play drums? -No. 381 00:30:03,543 --> 00:30:05,204 Perfect! You want a job? 382 00:30:09,089 --> 00:30:14,000 I'm doing a musical performance. You can sit in for my drummer. He's dead. 383 00:30:14,135 --> 00:30:15,547 Well, sure. 384 00:30:15,637 --> 00:30:17,380 What? He's dead? 385 00:30:17,472 --> 00:30:19,299 Actually, it's a very funny story. 386 00:30:19,391 --> 00:30:23,140 There's a crack dealer in our building and my drummer called him-- 387 00:30:24,938 --> 00:30:29,480 Slit his throat so badly that his own mom couldn't identify him at the morgue. 388 00:30:30,400 --> 00:30:31,977 I'll miss that guy. 389 00:30:32,068 --> 00:30:33,611 Is it a deal? 390 00:30:34,989 --> 00:30:37,777 Excellent. Here. You can put these up. 391 00:30:39,284 --> 00:30:42,202 That's a cool name for a band. 392 00:30:57,176 --> 00:30:58,339 Shit. 393 00:31:02,015 --> 00:31:03,474 -Hi. -Hi. 394 00:31:03,849 --> 00:31:05,309 It's a band. 395 00:31:05,643 --> 00:31:06,924 What is? 396 00:31:07,937 --> 00:31:09,052 This. 397 00:31:10,983 --> 00:31:12,440 That's nice. 398 00:31:14,275 --> 00:31:16,268 I'm the drummer. 399 00:31:16,569 --> 00:31:18,066 We kick ass. 400 00:31:18,322 --> 00:31:20,030 I guess you must. 401 00:31:22,576 --> 00:31:24,368 What are those for? 402 00:31:24,829 --> 00:31:27,319 It's a community garden. 403 00:31:27,539 --> 00:31:31,917 We'll plant flowers and have a playground for kids, vegetables for families. 404 00:31:33,171 --> 00:31:34,416 Cool. 405 00:31:34,506 --> 00:31:38,751 Yeah, but the lot is totally bare of soil. We'll need fertilizer. 406 00:31:39,175 --> 00:31:41,417 -Fertilizer? -Yeah, a lot of it. 407 00:31:41,511 --> 00:31:44,215 And then I saw your sign. I thought... 408 00:31:44,305 --> 00:31:46,594 that is exactly what we need. 409 00:31:49,519 --> 00:31:51,725 Well, maybe I can help out. 410 00:31:52,522 --> 00:31:54,430 Wonderful. I'm Lily. 411 00:31:55,857 --> 00:31:57,056 I'm Joe. 412 00:32:15,002 --> 00:32:19,249 Dear Lily, it was great to meet you. I'm into gardening, too. 413 00:32:19,423 --> 00:32:23,372 I can plant trees, weed flowers, dig bulbs.... 414 00:32:23,468 --> 00:32:26,836 Boobs, Joe, not bulbs! Tell her you dig her boobs! 415 00:32:26,929 --> 00:32:28,921 Dames like compliments! 416 00:32:30,725 --> 00:32:35,302 Nothing like the sight of a woman with a sack of grubs hanging off her abdomen. 417 00:32:35,395 --> 00:32:38,350 Can't you see I'm trying to have some privacy? 418 00:32:39,482 --> 00:32:42,981 Hey, Joe, what's this idea you people keep kicking about "privacy"? 419 00:32:43,068 --> 00:32:45,642 Explain it to us. We don't get it. 420 00:32:46,154 --> 00:32:48,612 People need to be alone sometimes. 421 00:32:48,700 --> 00:32:51,819 That's a false philosophic concept. 422 00:32:52,119 --> 00:32:54,954 -You are never alone. -Not in New York City. 423 00:32:55,039 --> 00:32:58,788 Us roaches see everything you do. So what? We're all friends here. 424 00:32:58,877 --> 00:33:00,702 Okay. Fine. Shut up. 425 00:33:01,420 --> 00:33:02,665 Oh, I like that. 426 00:33:02,755 --> 00:33:04,832 -"Shut up," he says. -Shut up yourself. 427 00:33:04,924 --> 00:33:07,593 -No manners, this guy. -Who needs you? 428 00:33:07,801 --> 00:33:10,339 -So long, Romeo. -I bet she's a dog. 429 00:33:18,645 --> 00:33:21,480 Dear Lily, I want to help your garden. 430 00:33:21,648 --> 00:33:25,692 That's "plow your garden," Joe. Tell her you want to plow her. 431 00:33:31,657 --> 00:33:33,566 I said shut up already! 432 00:33:33,658 --> 00:33:34,857 Come on, Joe! 433 00:33:34,952 --> 00:33:37,656 Dames secretly like it when you give them shit. 434 00:33:37,746 --> 00:33:40,663 We need fertilizer. Lots ofit. 435 00:33:44,836 --> 00:33:46,035 What are you doing? 436 00:33:46,130 --> 00:33:49,214 Giving you a neck rub. You seem a little tense. 437 00:33:49,341 --> 00:33:51,748 -Okay, okay! We're gone! -Chill out. 438 00:34:28,420 --> 00:34:29,535 Wait. 439 00:34:29,962 --> 00:34:31,422 Hey, get out! 440 00:35:39,571 --> 00:35:43,320 You've got to be more careful with those enthusiastic greetings. 441 00:35:43,408 --> 00:35:45,031 I'm an old man. 442 00:35:45,200 --> 00:35:46,694 Oh, Daddy. 443 00:35:47,786 --> 00:35:52,116 I got a call from your job supervisor the other day. 444 00:35:52,875 --> 00:35:57,288 He told me that you're spending a lot of time in that little atrium of yours. 445 00:35:57,379 --> 00:35:59,254 But I must insist.... 446 00:36:02,759 --> 00:36:05,466 Tell me where you got those earrings. 447 00:36:06,931 --> 00:36:08,046 Saks. 448 00:36:08,349 --> 00:36:11,930 The atrium is just a dry run for my first big project. 449 00:36:12,227 --> 00:36:15,761 What? I'm sorry, a project? What project? 450 00:36:15,855 --> 00:36:18,772 I'm starting a community garden in the East Village. 451 00:36:18,857 --> 00:36:20,935 That's nice. Whereabouts? 452 00:36:21,153 --> 00:36:24,356 East 8th Street in Avenue B. In your old neighborhood. 453 00:36:24,448 --> 00:36:26,439 Isn't this great, Daddy? 454 00:36:26,532 --> 00:36:27,730 Pumpkin... 455 00:36:27,825 --> 00:36:30,825 I'm building a federal prison on that site. 456 00:36:32,411 --> 00:36:35,367 A prison? In the middle of the East Village? 457 00:36:35,791 --> 00:36:39,740 Why not? With all the crime and drugs, it's already a prison. 458 00:36:42,422 --> 00:36:45,257 Not until my 30-day gardening permit expires. 459 00:36:45,341 --> 00:36:49,174 And by that time, I'll have the whole East Village behind me. 460 00:36:49,263 --> 00:36:51,421 Now, if you'll excuse me... 461 00:36:52,808 --> 00:36:54,680 I have some mulching to do. 462 00:37:10,616 --> 00:37:12,524 Hey, what's that smell? 463 00:37:12,617 --> 00:37:14,860 -It's odoriferous. -It's "splendoriferous." 464 00:37:14,953 --> 00:37:19,247 -Joe, you are a prince among men. -Always thinking of your buddies. 465 00:37:21,001 --> 00:37:22,080 Letter for Ralph. 466 00:37:22,169 --> 00:37:24,244 -Mail call! -Anything for me? 467 00:37:24,545 --> 00:37:27,001 -Letter for Rodney. -A postcard from Uncle Sid. 468 00:37:27,089 --> 00:37:28,418 How is Tampa? 469 00:37:28,591 --> 00:37:30,050 Garbage magazine? 470 00:37:30,135 --> 00:37:32,542 -Thanks a bunch, Joe! -My sex toy arrived yet? 471 00:37:32,637 --> 00:37:34,428 Junk mail, junk mail. 472 00:37:34,513 --> 00:37:36,175 Hey, one for me. 473 00:37:36,266 --> 00:37:37,927 -It's from Mom. -No kidding. 474 00:37:38,018 --> 00:37:40,424 -How is the old bag? -Be respectful. 475 00:37:40,519 --> 00:37:42,427 Joe knows I'm kidding! 476 00:37:43,772 --> 00:37:47,605 "Dear Joe, got you a job interview with P.I. Smith & Sons. 477 00:37:47,694 --> 00:37:50,266 "The boss is my old high school classmate." 478 00:37:50,362 --> 00:37:54,360 -P.I. Smith & Sons? Great company. -You've heard of them? 479 00:37:54,449 --> 00:37:56,737 They're the biggest manufacturer in New York. 480 00:37:56,825 --> 00:37:58,284 What do they make? 481 00:38:00,455 --> 00:38:05,032 When I was about your age, I woke up one morning and said to myself: 482 00:38:05,126 --> 00:38:06,786 "Urinal cake. 483 00:38:06,878 --> 00:38:08,621 "That's the future." 484 00:38:09,463 --> 00:38:10,626 So... 485 00:38:11,048 --> 00:38:14,214 I decided to aim for men's room manufacturing. 486 00:38:15,719 --> 00:38:19,551 Now I'm the richest man in the urinal sanitation industry. 487 00:38:21,184 --> 00:38:24,302 Twenty million men piss on my name everyday. 488 00:38:25,728 --> 00:38:27,104 That's great, sir. 489 00:38:27,188 --> 00:38:29,228 So, you're an lowa boy, like me. 490 00:38:29,316 --> 00:38:31,854 Yes, sir. Went to Murchison High School. 491 00:38:31,943 --> 00:38:33,734 Good old Murchison. 492 00:38:33,945 --> 00:38:35,523 "Go, Bullfrogs! " 493 00:38:37,657 --> 00:38:41,701 My mom could do that cheer really well. She was a varsity cheerleader. 494 00:38:41,785 --> 00:38:43,328 I remember. 495 00:38:43,830 --> 00:38:46,782 Your mom was the hottest tomato in school. 496 00:38:51,879 --> 00:38:55,662 Does your mom still wear her hair in that sexy way? 497 00:38:58,552 --> 00:39:01,922 Does mischief still sparkle in her eye... 498 00:39:03,097 --> 00:39:04,508 that minx? 499 00:39:05,976 --> 00:39:09,973 Mommy still got that saucy swing to her hips? 500 00:39:13,065 --> 00:39:15,189 Did Mommy ever give you... 501 00:39:15,569 --> 00:39:17,062 a sponge bath? 502 00:39:19,488 --> 00:39:22,822 Welcome to the research department for P.I. Smith & Sons. 503 00:39:22,908 --> 00:39:26,859 You will play an essential role in our quest for the perfect urinal cake: 504 00:39:26,955 --> 00:39:28,697 Used product retrieval. 505 00:39:28,789 --> 00:39:32,370 Your first assignment, retrieve all used product from the restrooms... 506 00:39:32,458 --> 00:39:35,661 at 58 East 161st Street, the Bronx. 507 00:39:35,753 --> 00:39:38,873 Deliver them to the research department for testing. 508 00:39:39,173 --> 00:39:41,844 58 East 161st Street. 509 00:39:42,552 --> 00:39:45,553 58 East 161st.... 510 00:39:56,107 --> 00:39:57,517 Joe's here! 511 00:39:58,317 --> 00:40:00,392 Let him watch. He's okay. 512 00:40:01,236 --> 00:40:02,315 What's this? 513 00:40:02,404 --> 00:40:05,358 Channel R. The roach public access channel. 514 00:40:06,033 --> 00:40:07,989 You roaches have your own channel? 515 00:40:08,076 --> 00:40:09,404 Shut up! 516 00:40:16,752 --> 00:40:20,166 Are you ready for something itsy-bitsy, baby? 517 00:40:21,798 --> 00:40:24,918 Come and get it, you greasy little tick. 518 00:40:25,426 --> 00:40:28,344 Oh, my God! I'm going to pupate! 519 00:40:30,639 --> 00:40:32,383 You so fine, baby. 520 00:40:32,767 --> 00:40:35,339 Bloats up your crop, don't it, Joe? 521 00:40:48,823 --> 00:40:50,198 Hey, Joe! 522 00:40:51,159 --> 00:40:54,326 -What is it now? -You seem a little down. 523 00:40:54,413 --> 00:40:55,906 Are you okay? 524 00:40:56,373 --> 00:40:57,653 Just great. 525 00:40:57,791 --> 00:40:59,996 I'm lonely, my job sucks... 526 00:41:00,334 --> 00:41:03,666 and I'm in love with a girl who's got a boyfriend. 527 00:41:03,920 --> 00:41:06,493 My life has totally turned to shit. 528 00:41:06,756 --> 00:41:08,999 Funny thing about shit, Joe. 529 00:41:09,302 --> 00:41:12,256 -Good stuff grows out of it. -Yeah, right. 530 00:41:12,764 --> 00:41:16,178 You don't believe me? Check out that bag in the corner. 531 00:41:51,967 --> 00:41:54,540 Where do you want this stupid bush? 532 00:41:55,930 --> 00:41:57,636 Right over there. 533 00:41:58,055 --> 00:42:00,013 Isn't this great, Blank? 534 00:42:01,016 --> 00:42:02,345 This is not my thing. 535 00:42:02,435 --> 00:42:04,557 Why did I say yes to this? 536 00:42:07,942 --> 00:42:09,222 For you. 537 00:42:10,110 --> 00:42:12,149 Elephicalia vermilius? 538 00:42:13,070 --> 00:42:15,277 I did my senior thesis on this flower. 539 00:42:15,364 --> 00:42:18,318 It's only found in Sri Lankan elephant habitats. 540 00:42:18,409 --> 00:42:20,982 It loves rotting, moist conditions. 541 00:42:26,334 --> 00:42:27,578 You know.... 542 00:42:28,460 --> 00:42:30,997 It's a terrific planting for the garden. 543 00:42:32,255 --> 00:42:33,499 Good. 544 00:42:33,714 --> 00:42:34,877 Thanks. 545 00:42:37,094 --> 00:42:38,836 What's "P.I.S. & S?" 546 00:42:41,013 --> 00:42:43,765 It's the bank I work for. 547 00:42:45,351 --> 00:42:48,850 "Prudential lnvestment Stocks and Security Savings...." 548 00:42:50,899 --> 00:42:53,224 I thought you played in a band. 549 00:42:53,736 --> 00:42:54,814 I do. 550 00:42:55,403 --> 00:42:56,564 But... 551 00:42:57,571 --> 00:43:00,061 banking is kind of like my trade. 552 00:43:00,198 --> 00:43:02,820 I'm sort of a rock-and-roll banker. 553 00:43:03,952 --> 00:43:06,278 You wear these overalls to work? 554 00:43:09,959 --> 00:43:11,368 What's this? 555 00:43:14,044 --> 00:43:17,710 Those are super-mulching pellets. 556 00:43:17,799 --> 00:43:20,123 Great for growing things. 557 00:43:20,217 --> 00:43:23,717 -I've never seen them before. -It's a new technology. 558 00:43:24,472 --> 00:43:27,044 Could you get some of these for the garden? 559 00:43:28,392 --> 00:43:30,051 As many as you want! 560 00:43:34,482 --> 00:43:35,891 Thank you. 561 00:43:36,608 --> 00:43:38,103 You're great. 562 00:43:40,237 --> 00:43:43,320 On one condition: You come see my band tomorrow night. 563 00:43:43,405 --> 00:43:45,528 I can put you on the list. 564 00:43:47,368 --> 00:43:48,911 I don't know. 565 00:43:49,580 --> 00:43:50,907 Come on. 566 00:43:55,125 --> 00:43:57,284 Can't resist a man in a uniform. 567 00:44:04,175 --> 00:44:06,464 Thank you for tuning into Alternative Life. 568 00:44:06,552 --> 00:44:09,126 New York's only truly underground forum. 569 00:44:09,222 --> 00:44:10,882 We continue last week's discussion: 570 00:44:10,974 --> 00:44:14,093 "How can we promote better understanding between species?" 571 00:44:14,185 --> 00:44:16,178 Lay off the rat jokes! 572 00:44:16,271 --> 00:44:19,272 How many rats does it take to screw in a light bulb? 573 00:44:19,358 --> 00:44:21,599 How'd you like a punch in the beak, wise guy? 574 00:44:21,693 --> 00:44:23,520 Lay off the bird, sewer breath! 575 00:44:23,612 --> 00:44:25,485 Go gnaw some nuts! 576 00:44:25,655 --> 00:44:27,362 Can 't we all just get along? 577 00:44:27,447 --> 00:44:28,527 No! 578 00:44:34,121 --> 00:44:35,200 Now, guys-- 579 00:44:35,289 --> 00:44:37,697 -Out of the way. -We're watching Charlie Roach. 580 00:44:37,792 --> 00:44:39,499 I've got a date tonight. 581 00:44:40,711 --> 00:44:42,168 Is she cute? 582 00:44:42,253 --> 00:44:44,710 -About time, Joey! -Porkola time, buddy. 583 00:44:44,799 --> 00:44:47,289 -So I want you to stay out of sight. -Who, us? 584 00:44:47,384 --> 00:44:49,754 -Sure, Joey. -No problem, Joe. 585 00:44:49,843 --> 00:44:52,216 -You got the place to yourself. -We're Gandhi. 586 00:44:52,304 --> 00:44:56,598 I'll forget every horrible thing you've ever done to me if you disappear tonight. 587 00:44:56,851 --> 00:44:58,927 -Just disappear. -We're on the same team. 588 00:44:59,020 --> 00:45:00,680 Forget about it. 589 00:45:00,938 --> 00:45:02,481 I mean it. 590 00:45:03,941 --> 00:45:05,222 Thanks, Joe. 591 00:45:05,318 --> 00:45:07,475 Look at that piece of meat. 592 00:45:08,070 --> 00:45:10,313 That is some dope shit, Joe. 593 00:45:10,448 --> 00:45:12,191 Look at that, Joe! 594 00:45:25,627 --> 00:45:28,001 -That hit the spot. -Complements to the chef. 595 00:45:28,090 --> 00:45:29,632 Joe's first date! 596 00:45:31,217 --> 00:45:33,126 Let's make it special. 597 00:45:33,385 --> 00:45:35,674 -Great idea, Ralph. -Special, sure. 598 00:45:35,762 --> 00:45:36,924 I'm in favor. 599 00:45:42,854 --> 00:45:46,187 Come on, buddy, that's it. Let's get him over the curb. 600 00:45:51,277 --> 00:45:52,357 Mr. Smith? 601 00:45:53,406 --> 00:45:55,446 It's a hostile takeover. 602 00:45:57,117 --> 00:46:00,486 Ten minutes ago this company became a wholly-owned subsidiary... 603 00:46:00,579 --> 00:46:02,701 of Featherstone Feminine Products. 604 00:46:02,789 --> 00:46:06,239 They're going to shut down the whole urinal cake division! 605 00:46:06,333 --> 00:46:08,161 Don't forget to take this. 606 00:46:08,252 --> 00:46:11,587 This way, gentlemen. Roll it over here. 607 00:46:14,967 --> 00:46:16,959 My whole life's work! 608 00:46:17,177 --> 00:46:18,672 Ruined! 609 00:46:19,180 --> 00:46:20,588 That's right. 610 00:46:20,679 --> 00:46:23,598 The days of trickle-down economics are over. 611 00:47:16,109 --> 00:47:19,227 Ladies and gentlemen. It's loud, it's bad... 612 00:47:19,319 --> 00:47:21,478 it's Shit! 613 00:47:31,582 --> 00:47:32,993 Easy crowd. 614 00:47:37,379 --> 00:47:39,123 Oh, a new drummer. 615 00:47:41,258 --> 00:47:43,250 Yeah, I hope he's good. 616 00:47:43,384 --> 00:47:44,629 Hit it! 617 00:48:13,872 --> 00:48:15,580 I'm sorry! 618 00:48:16,040 --> 00:48:19,291 There won't be any rock-and-roll tonight. 619 00:48:19,461 --> 00:48:21,952 This is all that's left! 620 00:48:27,385 --> 00:48:30,421 This feeble wimped-out death rattle... 621 00:48:30,513 --> 00:48:33,597 is all that remains of the rolling thunder... 622 00:48:33,683 --> 00:48:35,674 of America's heartbeat! 623 00:48:56,706 --> 00:48:58,530 It wasn't that bad. 624 00:48:58,747 --> 00:49:00,242 Yes, it was. 625 00:49:02,335 --> 00:49:05,336 Maybe you should stick to banking, after all. 626 00:49:06,338 --> 00:49:08,959 I'm not a banker. I'm not a drummer. 627 00:49:09,675 --> 00:49:12,925 I can't even keep a job collecting urinal cakes. 628 00:49:13,095 --> 00:49:14,423 I'm just... 629 00:49:14,888 --> 00:49:16,002 nothing. 630 00:49:17,183 --> 00:49:19,175 I think you're something. 631 00:49:24,689 --> 00:49:27,975 -Why aren't you with your boyfriend? -What boyfriend? 632 00:49:28,067 --> 00:49:31,519 The guy I saw you kiss in the garden a few days ago. 633 00:49:33,656 --> 00:49:36,362 He's probably home kissing my mother. 634 00:49:38,202 --> 00:49:39,662 He's my dad. 635 00:49:45,752 --> 00:49:48,077 The lot is completely planted. 636 00:49:48,169 --> 00:49:51,504 The community is behind it, the flowers are starting to bloom. 637 00:49:51,591 --> 00:49:53,832 Now I just have to show it to my father... 638 00:49:53,926 --> 00:49:57,044 and show him something good can come out of the neighborhood... 639 00:49:57,136 --> 00:49:58,547 and it's worth saving. 640 00:49:58,638 --> 00:50:00,382 Do you want to come to my place? 641 00:50:04,185 --> 00:50:05,892 I've got a towel you could use. 642 00:50:29,042 --> 00:50:32,956 Funky towel Towel's got the funk 643 00:50:33,755 --> 00:50:37,373 Funky towel Towel's got the funk 644 00:50:43,139 --> 00:50:45,345 Baby, I got the love 645 00:50:45,433 --> 00:50:47,591 Baby, I got the power 646 00:50:47,685 --> 00:50:49,844 Come on, girl, and rock my world 647 00:50:49,938 --> 00:50:52,143 And my funky towel 648 00:51:04,201 --> 00:51:06,323 Baby, got the love 649 00:51:06,411 --> 00:51:08,404 Baby, got the howl 650 00:51:08,746 --> 00:51:10,953 Let's get down to party town 651 00:51:11,041 --> 00:51:13,165 And my funky towel 652 00:51:15,629 --> 00:51:19,459 Thick and funky Steamin ' up the dance floor 653 00:51:20,424 --> 00:51:23,341 Get on up and shake that thing 654 00:51:25,054 --> 00:51:28,387 Everybody's gettin ' what they ask for 655 00:51:29,684 --> 00:51:32,850 Everybody, everybody, sing 656 00:51:34,270 --> 00:51:37,437 Sing, sing, sing 657 00:51:38,315 --> 00:51:41,271 Welcome to Joey's toilet 658 00:52:07,802 --> 00:52:09,511 -Make yourself at home. -Thanks. 659 00:52:09,597 --> 00:52:11,174 I've got a towel.... 660 00:52:21,149 --> 00:52:22,476 What are you doing? 661 00:52:22,566 --> 00:52:25,318 Having a party, what does it look like? 662 00:52:25,486 --> 00:52:27,645 I'm serious. I want you out of here! 663 00:52:27,739 --> 00:52:29,980 -Joe, my brother! -Thanks, Joey! 664 00:52:30,074 --> 00:52:32,445 -What say there? -Bust a move. 665 00:52:33,660 --> 00:52:35,737 Funky towel 666 00:52:35,830 --> 00:52:38,155 Towel's got the funk 667 00:52:39,334 --> 00:52:42,169 Okay, I'm dancing. Now, beat it. Leave. 668 00:52:51,635 --> 00:52:54,721 You just flushed the rhythm section out to Coney lsland. 669 00:52:54,806 --> 00:52:57,214 So follow them out there. Lily's here. 670 00:52:57,308 --> 00:52:58,506 She is? 671 00:53:03,272 --> 00:53:05,679 My towels are in the laundry. 672 00:53:05,774 --> 00:53:07,434 Oh, that's fine. 673 00:53:27,922 --> 00:53:29,085 So... 674 00:53:29,631 --> 00:53:31,622 do you live here alone? 675 00:53:32,258 --> 00:53:34,417 Yep. Nobody here but us. 676 00:53:39,682 --> 00:53:41,474 Guys, you promised. 677 00:53:42,726 --> 00:53:45,431 Come on, baby, light my fire. 678 00:53:48,106 --> 00:53:50,479 -Up periscope. -Music, maestro. 679 00:54:00,577 --> 00:54:02,653 How about a smooch, baby? 680 00:54:09,419 --> 00:54:11,292 Your place is so comfy. 681 00:54:12,005 --> 00:54:13,084 Shut up. 682 00:54:14,756 --> 00:54:16,167 I mean... 683 00:54:17,593 --> 00:54:18,755 drink up. 684 00:54:20,554 --> 00:54:22,463 Down the hatch, sweetie. 685 00:54:23,307 --> 00:54:25,880 Here's to life's little surprises. 686 00:54:33,024 --> 00:54:35,777 I think you'll need one of these, Joe. 687 00:54:40,280 --> 00:54:41,692 Pretzel nugget? 688 00:54:43,410 --> 00:54:44,986 Bon appetit. 689 00:54:49,374 --> 00:54:50,952 What a lover! 690 00:54:51,084 --> 00:54:52,577 A real Casanova. 691 00:54:53,085 --> 00:54:54,283 Go get her. 692 00:54:54,920 --> 00:54:56,713 I beg your pardon? 693 00:54:57,174 --> 00:54:58,667 Feeling better? 694 00:54:59,133 --> 00:55:00,413 Well, I'm... 695 00:55:00,967 --> 00:55:02,675 still a little wet. 696 00:55:07,474 --> 00:55:09,762 -What's going on? -Don't push. 697 00:55:10,518 --> 00:55:12,725 I'm sorry. I hope you don't catch cold. 698 00:55:12,812 --> 00:55:14,852 -She wants it. -I smell victory. 699 00:55:15,064 --> 00:55:17,058 At least it wasn't a downpour. 700 00:55:19,653 --> 00:55:21,146 Steady there! 701 00:55:25,449 --> 00:55:27,358 -Steady! -Don't tip it! 702 00:55:34,792 --> 00:55:36,618 Let me out of here! 703 00:55:40,213 --> 00:55:41,709 No, no! Wait! 704 00:55:42,716 --> 00:55:44,294 Oh, my God! 705 00:55:45,927 --> 00:55:47,552 Lily, come back! 706 00:55:54,435 --> 00:55:56,475 Oh, my God. 707 00:55:59,189 --> 00:56:00,470 My garden. 708 00:56:06,072 --> 00:56:07,696 My father was right. 709 00:56:09,365 --> 00:56:12,070 This place does deserve to be a prison. 710 00:56:13,370 --> 00:56:15,861 The East Village sucks! 711 00:56:25,339 --> 00:56:27,416 We're really sorry, man. 712 00:56:27,509 --> 00:56:29,384 -We're sorry. -We didn't mean it. 713 00:56:29,471 --> 00:56:31,129 Tough break, buddy. 714 00:56:31,221 --> 00:56:32,465 We didn't know. 715 00:56:32,555 --> 00:56:35,128 Beer, Joe? Oh, sorry. 716 00:56:35,224 --> 00:56:37,050 She'll never speak to me again. 717 00:56:37,142 --> 00:56:39,349 Come on. There'll be others, Joe. 718 00:56:39,437 --> 00:56:41,891 I don't want any others. I want Lily. 719 00:56:42,355 --> 00:56:43,519 I want to die. 720 00:56:43,608 --> 00:56:45,315 Look on the bright side. 721 00:56:45,776 --> 00:56:47,520 You always got us. 722 00:56:49,988 --> 00:56:51,364 All right. 723 00:56:51,490 --> 00:56:52,865 That's it. 724 00:56:53,365 --> 00:56:56,614 I'm getting rid of you roaches once and for all. 725 00:56:57,036 --> 00:56:58,365 Wait. Don't be rash. 726 00:56:58,455 --> 00:57:00,862 I'll kill every last one of you! 727 00:57:00,999 --> 00:57:02,576 We're family! 728 00:57:02,667 --> 00:57:04,825 Well, I guess this means war. 729 00:57:06,962 --> 00:57:08,373 Joe, let's talk. 730 00:57:08,464 --> 00:57:10,955 This is all I have to say to you, Ralph. 731 00:57:12,637 --> 00:57:15,340 -He's got a bomb! -Run for your lives! 732 00:57:15,888 --> 00:57:17,679 No! Don't do it! 733 00:57:27,775 --> 00:57:30,099 My babies! My babies! 734 00:57:30,193 --> 00:57:32,315 One, two, three, heave! 735 00:57:33,571 --> 00:57:34,567 Heave! 736 00:57:46,750 --> 00:57:49,538 Careful, soldier, don't lose your head. 737 00:57:50,045 --> 00:57:52,536 Oh, Joe's little dolly got hurt. 738 00:57:55,884 --> 00:57:57,462 Red alert! 739 00:58:06,602 --> 00:58:08,678 Armored force, attack! 740 00:58:13,025 --> 00:58:14,436 Let her go! 741 00:58:15,903 --> 00:58:17,563 Timber! 742 00:58:31,460 --> 00:58:33,915 -What the.... -Hello, Joe. 743 00:58:34,003 --> 00:58:35,580 Now can we talk? 744 00:58:36,172 --> 00:58:38,746 -You go first. -No, you go first. 745 00:58:40,386 --> 00:58:42,259 Goddamn, you little sons of bitches! 746 00:58:42,345 --> 00:58:44,504 Get the hell out of my apartment! 747 00:58:44,598 --> 00:58:46,092 Listen to that. 748 00:58:46,183 --> 00:58:48,553 -Your apartment? -I believe we were here first. 749 00:58:48,642 --> 00:58:51,929 We'll be here last, too. We got a long-term lease on this planet. 750 00:58:52,021 --> 00:58:56,896 Roaches will be crawling on the daisy popping out of the last rotting human. 751 00:58:57,443 --> 00:58:58,854 God, you're disgusting! 752 00:58:58,945 --> 00:59:01,980 Like you humans are any kind of fucking prize! 753 00:59:02,072 --> 00:59:04,230 What makes you so much better than us? 754 00:59:04,324 --> 00:59:07,741 War, pollution, New Age music! 755 00:59:08,120 --> 00:59:10,823 I suppose those things are our fault? 756 00:59:16,712 --> 00:59:18,750 We just want to say two things. First: 757 00:59:18,837 --> 00:59:20,961 We're sorry we ruined your life. Second: 758 00:59:21,049 --> 00:59:22,163 Goodbye. 759 00:59:22,258 --> 00:59:23,753 -Toodles. -Sayonara. 760 00:59:23,844 --> 00:59:25,669 What do you mean "goodbye"? 761 00:59:25,761 --> 00:59:29,890 -We took a big risk talking to you. -Since you faked our friendship... 762 00:59:29,975 --> 00:59:32,844 you can't walk off knowing what you know. 763 00:59:35,020 --> 00:59:36,929 Painful decision, Joe. 764 00:59:37,606 --> 00:59:38,769 Wait! 765 00:59:41,943 --> 00:59:43,982 Here, roachy, roachy. 766 00:59:45,614 --> 00:59:47,191 Going to miss you. 767 00:59:48,157 --> 00:59:49,901 I was kidding. 768 00:59:50,035 --> 00:59:53,155 -Any last words? -Don't kill me. 769 00:59:53,413 --> 00:59:54,954 Those are the last words? 770 00:59:55,038 --> 00:59:56,948 Ready! Aim! 771 01:00:04,800 --> 01:00:06,625 Ralph! Rodney! 772 01:00:07,885 --> 01:00:09,129 Help! 773 01:01:31,799 --> 01:01:33,791 Big deal. Please hold. 774 01:01:34,760 --> 01:01:36,586 So what? Please hold. 775 01:01:37,220 --> 01:01:39,675 Don't make me laugh. Please hold. 776 01:01:41,474 --> 01:01:42,968 No, ma'am. 777 01:01:43,059 --> 01:01:46,927 I think you should take the shrapnel out before you cauterize. 778 01:01:47,022 --> 01:01:49,892 -I don 't think I can do it. -Please hold. 779 01:01:51,400 --> 01:01:53,440 Central Complaint Department. 780 01:01:53,528 --> 01:01:56,196 I'd like to speak to Lily Dougherty. 781 01:01:58,698 --> 01:02:00,359 Lily's not here. 782 01:02:00,910 --> 01:02:02,403 Will she be back soon? 783 01:02:02,493 --> 01:02:04,819 No. She's sick. 784 01:02:04,913 --> 01:02:05,992 Sick? 785 01:02:07,958 --> 01:02:09,866 She's sick of her job. 786 01:02:10,125 --> 01:02:11,833 And she's sick of New York City. 787 01:02:11,918 --> 01:02:15,918 And she's sick of having her stupid daydreams dashed to pieces. 788 01:02:17,133 --> 01:02:18,710 And what makes her sickest... 789 01:02:18,801 --> 01:02:22,051 is the unspeakably rotten things some people do to other people... 790 01:02:22,137 --> 01:02:24,260 just when she was beginning to like them! 791 01:02:24,348 --> 01:02:25,842 Lily, is that you? 792 01:02:26,892 --> 01:02:27,970 No. 793 01:02:28,310 --> 01:02:29,687 Lily quit. 794 01:02:29,771 --> 01:02:31,313 Lily, it's Joe! 795 01:02:31,397 --> 01:02:32,477 Lily! 796 01:03:13,896 --> 01:03:15,059 Ralph! 797 01:03:16,982 --> 01:03:18,013 Rodney! 798 01:03:19,901 --> 01:03:22,605 I don't care if you can hear me or not, Ralph! 799 01:03:22,862 --> 01:03:25,483 But you can keep this goddamn city! 800 01:03:26,031 --> 01:03:28,702 I'm going back to lowa! 801 01:03:29,244 --> 01:03:31,865 Here's a souvenir to take with you. 802 01:03:33,705 --> 01:03:35,497 So long, sucker. 803 01:03:35,791 --> 01:03:37,866 I love the real estate business. 804 01:03:46,301 --> 01:03:48,340 The place looks great. 805 01:03:48,428 --> 01:03:50,219 Sure it does, Ralph. Where's Joe? 806 01:03:50,304 --> 01:03:52,427 Around here someplace, I suppose. 807 01:03:55,560 --> 01:03:56,675 Joe! 808 01:03:58,480 --> 01:04:00,389 Joe, speak to me! 809 01:04:00,482 --> 01:04:02,060 Who did this to you? 810 01:04:02,151 --> 01:04:06,146 We did, Ralph. We ran out on him just when he needed us most. 811 01:04:06,986 --> 01:04:09,277 We behaved no better than a bunch of people. 812 01:04:09,365 --> 01:04:12,569 We got to make it up to him. Let's find him a new place. 813 01:04:13,494 --> 01:04:15,652 We got to get Lily back, too. 814 01:04:16,580 --> 01:04:19,071 Forget that, I'm a cockroach, not Santa Claus. 815 01:04:19,166 --> 01:04:23,079 Ralphie, I'm surprised at you. Does this mean you're giving up? 816 01:04:23,169 --> 01:04:26,454 Give up? Give up? What are you saying to me? 817 01:04:27,006 --> 01:04:30,008 How come us roaches have been able to outlast the dinosaurs? 818 01:04:30,093 --> 01:04:32,927 How do we survive poison and persecution? 819 01:04:33,012 --> 01:04:36,048 How do we keep on crawling in the face of the world in arms? 820 01:04:36,140 --> 01:04:37,171 How? 821 01:04:37,266 --> 01:04:40,302 I'll tell you how. Because we never give up! 822 01:04:42,355 --> 01:04:44,181 A true cockroach never gives up! 823 01:04:44,273 --> 01:04:48,057 They can stomp us, they can pop us, but they'll never ever stop us! 824 01:04:50,278 --> 01:04:55,356 Some day, the great H-bomb will drop, and we'll have the planet to ourselves! 825 01:04:58,286 --> 01:05:02,498 I don't care if we call in favors from every roach, rat and pigeon in New York. 826 01:05:02,582 --> 01:05:04,704 We aren't giving up on Joe! 827 01:05:04,791 --> 01:05:07,284 -Great speech, Ralph! -Truly righteous, brother. 828 01:05:19,765 --> 01:05:21,259 Where's the stapler? 829 01:05:25,104 --> 01:05:28,140 -I need five copies. -How do you spell "memorandum"? 830 01:05:32,111 --> 01:05:33,309 Boot it up. 831 01:05:34,904 --> 01:05:36,815 Anybody got a 1942 W-440? 832 01:05:57,508 --> 01:05:58,919 Special delivery. 833 01:05:59,593 --> 01:06:01,836 This is giving me hay fever. 834 01:06:03,889 --> 01:06:06,263 Hey, watch the potholes, homes. 835 01:06:12,190 --> 01:06:14,977 Excuse me, sir. Mind if we borrow this? 836 01:06:56,148 --> 01:06:57,429 Tubular! 837 01:06:59,193 --> 01:07:00,355 Wash out! 838 01:07:00,695 --> 01:07:02,854 Sewer surfing 839 01:07:03,365 --> 01:07:05,522 Under-turfing 840 01:07:06,033 --> 01:07:08,321 We get our kicks while we're hanging six 841 01:07:08,410 --> 01:07:10,983 On a sewer surfing holiday 842 01:07:27,259 --> 01:07:29,834 We're surfing, we're sewer surfing 843 01:07:40,941 --> 01:07:43,312 Shoo-shoo Shooting the tube 844 01:07:43,568 --> 01:07:46,321 We are going to get there Shooting the tube 845 01:07:46,406 --> 01:07:48,694 Hitting the loo We're dirtier than you 846 01:07:48,783 --> 01:07:50,858 We are shooting the tube 847 01:08:24,774 --> 01:08:26,932 Are you sure this is the right address? 848 01:08:27,026 --> 01:08:28,142 Yes, Daddy. 849 01:08:28,237 --> 01:08:30,561 "324 1/2 East 8th Street. 850 01:08:30,655 --> 01:08:32,778 "Prison dedication, 9:00 a.m." 851 01:08:33,283 --> 01:08:36,449 Funny, I could have sworn this was an empty lot. 852 01:09:30,629 --> 01:09:32,289 -Hi, Lily. -Joe! 853 01:09:32,756 --> 01:09:34,250 What's all this? 854 01:09:34,341 --> 01:09:36,049 I guess it's sort of... 855 01:09:37,176 --> 01:09:38,338 mine. 856 01:09:39,970 --> 01:09:42,047 And I'm giving it to you. 857 01:09:43,808 --> 01:09:45,266 Is it okay? 858 01:09:45,600 --> 01:09:47,843 It's wonderful, but how did you.... 859 01:09:47,937 --> 01:09:50,772 My friends helped. 860 01:09:53,149 --> 01:09:54,347 I see. 861 01:09:56,570 --> 01:09:58,444 Lily, you were right. 862 01:09:58,614 --> 01:10:02,113 This park will do more for the Lower East Side than 1,000 prisons. 863 01:10:02,201 --> 01:10:05,616 My boy, you've done my old neighborhood a great service. 864 01:10:05,912 --> 01:10:08,201 It was all her idea, Senator. 865 01:10:11,542 --> 01:10:12,657 Come on. 866 01:10:16,256 --> 01:10:17,880 My friends... 867 01:10:18,049 --> 01:10:20,207 this extraordinary garden... 868 01:10:20,426 --> 01:10:23,878 is the first blossom of this neighborhood's rebirth. 869 01:10:23,972 --> 01:10:25,383 What is this? 870 01:10:28,516 --> 01:10:32,681 Kill that lying, two-timing Senator Dougherty. Tonight. 871 01:10:33,981 --> 01:10:37,514 Whack his daughter and that damn kid, too. 872 01:10:38,861 --> 01:10:40,983 See all these people here? 873 01:10:41,488 --> 01:10:43,813 Dead by the end of the week. 874 01:10:46,786 --> 01:10:48,445 And that little girl over there-- 875 01:10:48,537 --> 01:10:49,948 Mr. Shirt! 876 01:10:52,665 --> 01:10:55,238 Let me show you a hot new property. 877 01:11:04,426 --> 01:11:08,009 Welcome to Lily Park! 878 01:11:19,607 --> 01:11:21,980 There's an extra toothbrush in the cupboard. 879 01:11:22,069 --> 01:11:23,563 Oh, really, don't bother. 880 01:11:23,654 --> 01:11:27,188 It's the least I could do. Your house burned down. 881 01:11:27,990 --> 01:11:29,900 I'll set you up on the couch. 882 01:11:32,995 --> 01:11:35,748 Joe, you're practically inside. 883 01:11:35,831 --> 01:11:36,994 Ralph! 884 01:11:37,083 --> 01:11:39,538 -Little last minute advice. -Get lost, Ralph! 885 01:11:39,627 --> 01:11:41,666 Look into her eyes and say: 886 01:11:41,754 --> 01:11:44,754 "Baby, I'm going to bop you till your ears bleed! " 887 01:11:44,840 --> 01:11:46,797 Did you need something? 888 01:11:47,384 --> 01:11:48,499 No, thanks. 889 01:11:48,594 --> 01:11:51,927 Play your cards right, Joe, and this could be our new pad. 890 01:11:52,014 --> 01:11:53,970 "Our new pad"? You little.... 891 01:11:54,683 --> 01:11:57,848 We busted ass for you! What kind of thanks do we get? 892 01:12:00,770 --> 01:12:01,885 Ralph... 893 01:12:02,899 --> 01:12:04,098 thanks. 894 01:12:04,943 --> 01:12:06,602 For everything. 895 01:12:07,111 --> 01:12:11,109 Forget it. Sorry about our little misunderstanding back there. 896 01:12:11,698 --> 01:12:14,533 Me, too. Now, how about a little privacy? 897 01:12:14,952 --> 01:12:17,657 Take my advice, just grab her by-- 898 01:12:27,672 --> 01:12:30,078 Gosh, Lily, you look incredible. 899 01:12:30,591 --> 01:12:33,592 -How about a little help here? -No. I mean it. 900 01:12:35,680 --> 01:12:38,965 You're the most beautiful girl I've ever seen in my life. 901 01:12:39,850 --> 01:12:43,599 I bet you say that to all the girls the minute you get them alone. 902 01:12:44,896 --> 01:12:46,638 We are alone, aren't we? 903 01:12:48,692 --> 01:12:49,973 Last I looked. 904 01:12:50,069 --> 01:12:53,105 Oh, please, let me. I can make the bed myself. 905 01:12:53,197 --> 01:12:55,983 Really? Have you ever made a bed in your life? 906 01:12:56,449 --> 01:12:58,157 Sure, watch this. 907 01:13:00,829 --> 01:13:03,581 Swinging pad! What do you think, Rodney? 908 01:13:04,500 --> 01:13:05,745 Brother Ralph... 909 01:13:05,835 --> 01:13:09,832 I believe that we have finally reached the promised penthouse! 910 01:13:10,505 --> 01:13:13,174 Brother bugs and sister insects! 911 01:13:13,257 --> 01:13:15,048 Come on with it, Rodney! 912 01:13:15,133 --> 01:13:17,921 Give a shout out to the Great Big Bug. 913 01:13:18,847 --> 01:13:22,428 With his help, we can turn this antiseptic sanctuary... 914 01:13:22,516 --> 01:13:24,509 into a putrid paradise! 915 01:13:25,519 --> 01:13:28,803 Hold my feeler, Lord Lord, pull me through 916 01:13:28,896 --> 01:13:30,010 Pull me through 917 01:13:30,105 --> 01:13:34,057 Hold my feeler, Lord Lord, pull me through 918 01:13:34,612 --> 01:13:39,024 Hold my feeler, Lord Lord, till I join that golden horde 919 01:13:39,115 --> 01:13:41,108 I'll be hanging 920 01:13:41,951 --> 01:13:43,944 Hanging onto you 921 01:13:49,168 --> 01:13:52,002 Lily, now that we're alone, I should tell you... 922 01:13:52,086 --> 01:13:54,410 I'm sorry about what happened at my apartment. 923 01:13:54,504 --> 01:13:56,462 My friends are sorry, too. 924 01:13:56,548 --> 01:13:57,828 Friends? 925 01:13:58,341 --> 01:14:02,006 I never thought I'd say this, but they're actually kind of sweet. 926 01:14:02,220 --> 01:14:04,012 They must like you a lot. 927 01:14:05,140 --> 01:14:07,014 Not as much as I like you. 928 01:14:10,186 --> 01:14:11,467 Go, Joe! 929 01:14:11,563 --> 01:14:14,682 We've been battered And we've been scattered 930 01:14:15,066 --> 01:14:17,852 We've been splattered into goo 931 01:14:18,570 --> 01:14:22,021 -But the healer, he took my feeler -Praise the Lord, hallelujah! 932 01:14:22,115 --> 01:14:24,866 And he really pulled me through 933 01:14:24,951 --> 01:14:29,114 -Oh, he pulled me through -Oh, that feeler 934 01:14:32,250 --> 01:14:35,950 When I cash my chips and pay the dealer 935 01:14:36,212 --> 01:14:39,378 I'll be holding onto the Lord's feeler, too 936 01:14:40,173 --> 01:14:43,340 Hold my feeler 937 01:14:43,468 --> 01:14:45,507 And my antenna, too 938 01:14:46,555 --> 01:14:50,054 I've been down and I've been trampled 939 01:14:50,142 --> 01:14:53,426 And dug myself down deep in a hole 940 01:14:53,644 --> 01:14:55,304 But I was lifted 941 01:14:55,438 --> 01:14:57,348 By the love of that Great Big Bug 942 01:14:57,441 --> 01:15:00,605 With his feelers 'round my soul 943 01:15:00,900 --> 01:15:02,099 Whoa, Lord 944 01:15:02,194 --> 01:15:04,151 Won 't you hold my feeler? 945 01:15:04,238 --> 01:15:06,907 Hold my feeler and pull me through 946 01:15:06,989 --> 01:15:08,864 I want you to feel my feeler! 947 01:15:08,950 --> 01:15:13,495 My Lord, there 's nothing realer 948 01:15:18,794 --> 01:15:20,538 Joe, that tickles. 949 01:15:22,672 --> 01:15:28,876 Than my ever-loving feeler feeling you 950 01:15:38,479 --> 01:15:41,764 So! So long from Joe's apartment 951 01:15:41,857 --> 01:15:44,940 We're sad to see you go 952 01:15:45,026 --> 01:15:47,564 Thanks for coming, it's been swell 953 01:15:47,653 --> 01:15:50,275 Check back into our motel 954 01:15:50,365 --> 01:15:53,948 Hope you didn 't mind the smell 955 01:15:54,327 --> 01:15:55,952 Joe's apartment 956 01:15:56,038 --> 01:16:02,241 our own sweet home