1 00:00:32,300 --> 00:00:36,634 MALE NARRATOR: Prepare thyself for one twisted tale. 2 00:00:38,239 --> 00:00:42,869 Through the chapters of time, legends have been told 3 00:00:42,977 --> 00:00:46,310 of brave knights, evil warlocks, 4 00:00:46,414 --> 00:00:50,544 beautiful maidens, magical prophecies, 5 00:00:50,752 --> 00:00:53,516 and other serious shit. 6 00:00:57,258 --> 00:00:59,123 (SCREAMING) 7 00:00:59,661 --> 00:01:01,959 Be not afraid. 8 00:01:02,163 --> 00:01:03,926 This is your destiny. 9 00:01:04,832 --> 00:01:06,766 You will bear my seed, 10 00:01:07,335 --> 00:01:09,860 giving birth to a new beast, 11 00:01:10,872 --> 00:01:12,339 a new age: 12 00:01:12,707 --> 00:01:17,269 An age where I will command mankind in fear! 13 00:01:17,378 --> 00:01:18,402 (GROANS) 14 00:01:18,513 --> 00:01:20,105 (SCREAMING) 15 00:01:20,214 --> 00:01:21,545 KNIGHT: To arms! 16 00:01:27,722 --> 00:01:28,746 (YELLS) 17 00:01:33,928 --> 00:01:35,828 At ease, Maiden. 18 00:01:37,565 --> 00:01:39,624 When the light of the world flickers, 19 00:01:39,834 --> 00:01:41,392 we, the Golden Order of Knights, 20 00:01:41,502 --> 00:01:43,367 restore the rule of good. 21 00:01:43,571 --> 00:01:44,697 You're safe now. 22 00:01:45,340 --> 00:01:46,807 Then let us pray 23 00:01:47,008 --> 00:01:50,239 that 100 years from now when these two moons meet again, 24 00:01:50,345 --> 00:01:54,213 there will be a hero as brave as you, my lord. 25 00:01:56,484 --> 00:01:58,645 A hero as brave. 26 00:02:08,029 --> 00:02:09,428 Oh, fuck me. 27 00:02:09,530 --> 00:02:11,020 DWARF EXECUTIONER: Prince Thadeous of Mourne, 28 00:02:11,399 --> 00:02:14,027 you are hereby sentenced to death by hanging 29 00:02:14,168 --> 00:02:15,692 for your illicit behavior 30 00:02:15,803 --> 00:02:18,829 with the noble Dwarf King's second wife Regina. 31 00:02:19,474 --> 00:02:21,999 DWARF KING: You're a disgrace to any kingdom! 32 00:02:22,110 --> 00:02:24,271 I say hang the bastard. 33 00:02:24,612 --> 00:02:25,840 - Get on with it! - (DWARVES AGREEING) 34 00:02:26,047 --> 00:02:27,674 And your minstrel, Courtney, 35 00:02:27,882 --> 00:02:29,577 is to be tarred and feathered 36 00:02:29,717 --> 00:02:32,652 for unlawful association with a deviant. 37 00:02:32,820 --> 00:02:35,345 Children, I'm allergic, please. Let's not. 38 00:02:35,656 --> 00:02:38,887 Please! These allegations, they're being greatly exaggerated. 39 00:02:39,227 --> 00:02:41,127 It was more or less just heavy petting 40 00:02:41,229 --> 00:02:43,857 with a brief moment of penetration. 41 00:02:43,965 --> 00:02:45,023 (ALL EXCLAIMING) 42 00:02:45,133 --> 00:02:46,657 Disgusting! 43 00:02:46,868 --> 00:02:49,598 He deserves to die! Kill him! Hang the bastard! 44 00:02:49,737 --> 00:02:51,830 - THADEOUS: Hey! Easy! That's not nice. - (DWARVES SHOUTING) 45 00:02:51,973 --> 00:02:54,134 You, bloodthirsty little fucker! 46 00:02:54,275 --> 00:02:56,539 Show me some respect, I'm a prince! 47 00:02:57,078 --> 00:02:59,171 To the bowels of hell! 48 00:02:59,313 --> 00:03:00,280 Good night, Prince. 49 00:03:00,581 --> 00:03:01,946 Oh, dear gods. 50 00:03:05,453 --> 00:03:06,511 (SILENCE) 51 00:03:06,621 --> 00:03:07,918 - (ALL GASP) - (EXHALES) 52 00:03:09,157 --> 00:03:10,317 (COUGHING) 53 00:03:13,461 --> 00:03:14,928 Your Highness, what are you doing? 54 00:03:15,029 --> 00:03:16,189 I'm escaping, Courtney! 55 00:03:16,297 --> 00:03:18,424 Quit playing with those children and help me! 56 00:03:19,333 --> 00:03:20,322 Kill him! 57 00:03:21,235 --> 00:03:22,566 Get him! After him! 58 00:03:22,670 --> 00:03:23,659 COURTNEY: Your Highness, wait for me! 59 00:03:23,771 --> 00:03:24,738 THADEOUS: Why are they upset? 60 00:03:24,839 --> 00:03:26,466 All dwarf queens are unfaithful. 61 00:03:26,908 --> 00:03:28,603 Hurry, Courtney, back to the kingdom! 62 00:03:28,709 --> 00:03:30,700 COURTNEY: Forgive us with your tiny hearts! 63 00:03:30,945 --> 00:03:32,503 THADEOUS: Faster sheepies, faster! 64 00:03:32,613 --> 00:03:33,807 COURTNEY: Please wait, sir! 65 00:03:34,449 --> 00:03:36,917 THADEOUS: Courtney, you've proven yourself useless yet again. 66 00:03:37,018 --> 00:03:38,076 COURTNEY: Who's that? 67 00:03:38,419 --> 00:03:39,613 THADEOUS: We're safe and we're stoned. 68 00:03:39,720 --> 00:03:40,880 COURTNEY: Ganja! 69 00:03:42,023 --> 00:03:43,012 THADEOUS: They're gaining on us. 70 00:03:43,124 --> 00:03:44,091 COURTNEY: Oh, the dragon! 71 00:03:44,292 --> 00:03:45,987 Those Highland Dwarves have got weapons! 72 00:03:46,127 --> 00:03:47,151 Coming through. 73 00:03:47,295 --> 00:03:48,523 (LAUGHS) Boobies! 74 00:03:48,629 --> 00:03:49,653 (SCREAMS) 75 00:03:50,364 --> 00:03:51,490 Watch out, Courtney! 76 00:03:51,599 --> 00:03:52,657 (EXCLAIMS) 77 00:03:53,501 --> 00:03:54,763 I'm telling father we should go 78 00:03:54,869 --> 00:03:57,133 to war with these double-crossers. 79 00:03:57,238 --> 00:03:58,205 (CLUCKING) 80 00:03:58,306 --> 00:04:00,297 (EXCLAIMS) Poultry! 81 00:04:00,508 --> 00:04:02,908 Livestock! Courtney, this is no time to be napping. 82 00:04:03,010 --> 00:04:04,500 I'm a chicken. 83 00:04:05,680 --> 00:04:07,443 Let's get back... Oh, look! 84 00:04:07,548 --> 00:04:09,743 Mmm. A little feast to break up this pursuit. 85 00:04:09,951 --> 00:04:11,213 Dangerous, yet delicious. 86 00:04:11,319 --> 00:04:12,513 COURTNEY: I'm jumping out this window. 87 00:04:13,187 --> 00:04:14,176 (EXCLAIMS) 88 00:04:14,288 --> 00:04:15,585 He's angry! 89 00:04:15,790 --> 00:04:17,257 Courtney, break my fall with your body. 90 00:04:17,358 --> 00:04:19,883 COURTNEY: Ow! Please don't hurt my bottom! 91 00:04:21,095 --> 00:04:23,063 Run, Courtney! Pick up the pace! 92 00:04:23,164 --> 00:04:25,462 Why do people so little run so fast? 93 00:04:27,768 --> 00:04:29,235 (YELLING) 94 00:04:31,205 --> 00:04:32,604 (WOMEN YELLING) 95 00:04:35,877 --> 00:04:36,866 (GASPS) 96 00:04:36,978 --> 00:04:37,967 That was close. 97 00:04:38,079 --> 00:04:39,842 Courtney, I've had enough of this nonsense! 98 00:04:40,548 --> 00:04:42,072 Crack-a-lacka, you little varmint. 99 00:04:42,183 --> 00:04:43,707 COURTNEY: They're devils, sir! They're devils! 100 00:04:44,018 --> 00:04:45,952 - DWARF: Get him! - COURTNEY: They're muscular. 101 00:04:46,053 --> 00:04:47,782 - THADEOUS: Get off me! - COURTNEY: That's it, sir! 102 00:04:48,155 --> 00:04:49,488 Your Highness! 103 00:04:49,655 --> 00:04:52,300 YOUR HIGHNESS 104 00:04:57,131 --> 00:04:59,759 TALLIOUS: Please tell me that you completed your simple task 105 00:04:59,867 --> 00:05:02,392 and secured the treaty signed by the Lord of the Dwarf Village. 106 00:05:03,904 --> 00:05:05,667 Father, they sent a beautiful woman 107 00:05:05,772 --> 00:05:07,603 to distract me and I was defenseless. 108 00:05:07,774 --> 00:05:09,969 Don't bandy words with me, Thadeous. 109 00:05:10,077 --> 00:05:12,705 Your brother is to return from his quest at any moment. 110 00:05:12,813 --> 00:05:14,804 Please go and bathe yourself. 111 00:05:15,082 --> 00:05:16,811 Why must I bow to greet him? 112 00:05:17,017 --> 00:05:18,575 No one does anything special for me 113 00:05:18,685 --> 00:05:20,414 when I do extraordinary things. 114 00:05:20,787 --> 00:05:23,051 And what extraordinary things have you done of late? 115 00:05:23,156 --> 00:05:24,953 Do tell me. Enlighten me. 116 00:05:25,292 --> 00:05:27,385 Courtney, what extraordinary things have I done? 117 00:05:28,228 --> 00:05:30,890 You took a bubble bath, ate some toast, 118 00:05:30,997 --> 00:05:32,589 had a sleep for one hour, 119 00:05:32,699 --> 00:05:36,260 and commissioned a naked statue of your fine self. 120 00:05:37,904 --> 00:05:40,168 God, if your mother could see you now. 121 00:05:40,273 --> 00:05:41,672 Hear ye! Hear ye! 122 00:05:43,393 --> 00:05:44,121 (CLAMORING) (BELL TOLLING) 123 00:05:44,226 --> 00:05:45,250 Oh, dear gods. 124 00:05:45,361 --> 00:05:47,727 It is with blossoming personal joy 125 00:05:48,397 --> 00:05:51,366 that I announce the return of the mighty, 126 00:05:51,467 --> 00:05:53,697 the magnificent, the merciful, 127 00:05:54,003 --> 00:05:56,631 Prince Fabious! 128 00:05:56,939 --> 00:05:58,304 (ALL CHEERING) 129 00:05:58,774 --> 00:06:00,366 (FANFARE PLAYING) 130 00:06:06,015 --> 00:06:08,813 WOMAN 1: Hey, Prince Fabious, we adore you! 131 00:06:08,951 --> 00:06:10,418 MAN 1: Welcome home, Prince Fabious. 132 00:06:10,519 --> 00:06:11,577 WOMAN 1: You're my king, Prince Fabious. 133 00:06:11,854 --> 00:06:14,823 Welcome home! You are adored. 134 00:06:15,157 --> 00:06:16,146 MAN 2: It's Prince Fabious! 135 00:06:18,127 --> 00:06:20,561 WOMAN 2: Prince Fabious, I'm here for you now. 136 00:06:20,796 --> 00:06:22,559 Brother! 137 00:06:24,366 --> 00:06:26,891 Oh, my god, I missed you so. 138 00:06:27,002 --> 00:06:30,369 (EXCLAIMS IN DISGUST) Great to see you. 139 00:06:30,573 --> 00:06:32,040 Father. 140 00:06:32,141 --> 00:06:33,165 My son. 141 00:06:35,044 --> 00:06:36,136 Welcome home. 142 00:06:36,612 --> 00:06:37,909 FABIOUS: As you all know, 143 00:06:38,113 --> 00:06:40,445 the evil wizard Leezar has plagued our kingdom 144 00:06:40,549 --> 00:06:43,416 with his foul creatures and wicked ways for years. 145 00:06:43,786 --> 00:06:46,346 But with my brave trusted knights 146 00:06:46,555 --> 00:06:47,522 and my dear Simon. 147 00:06:47,623 --> 00:06:48,612 (SQUAWKING) (ALL EXCLAIMING) 148 00:06:48,724 --> 00:06:51,284 Join us, my mechanical friend. 149 00:06:52,027 --> 00:06:56,123 We have dispatched the latest of these cold blooded enemies. 150 00:06:56,732 --> 00:06:58,324 Behold! 151 00:06:58,867 --> 00:07:03,327 The head of Leezar's mighty Cyclops! 152 00:07:03,505 --> 00:07:04,938 (ALL CHEERING) 153 00:07:06,909 --> 00:07:08,001 MAN: Fuck, yeah! 154 00:07:08,210 --> 00:07:10,678 ALL: (CHANTING) Fabious! Fabious! Fabious! 155 00:07:17,486 --> 00:07:18,646 (CHANTING STOPS) 156 00:07:18,787 --> 00:07:24,089 Once again, Prince Fabious has made me as proud as a father could ever be. 157 00:07:24,293 --> 00:07:26,659 All the land owes him gratitude. 158 00:07:26,762 --> 00:07:27,729 (SQUAWKING) 159 00:07:27,830 --> 00:07:29,354 This is not the only good news 160 00:07:29,465 --> 00:07:31,433 that I've brought home with me today. 161 00:07:31,900 --> 00:07:35,802 Father, Brother, kingdom... 162 00:07:36,405 --> 00:07:37,463 (CROWD MURMURING) 163 00:07:37,906 --> 00:07:39,635 TALLIOUS: She is radiant! 164 00:07:39,975 --> 00:07:42,535 FABIOUS: I'd like you to meet my bride-to-be. 165 00:07:42,745 --> 00:07:44,144 Belladonna. 166 00:07:44,246 --> 00:07:45,611 (ALL CHEERING) 167 00:07:50,135 --> 00:07:51,363 TALLIOUS: Belladonna, my dear, 168 00:07:51,469 --> 00:07:53,869 why don't you delight us with your story. 169 00:07:54,072 --> 00:07:57,041 BELLADONNA: Oh, no. It's a story of strife and sadness. 170 00:07:57,242 --> 00:08:00,336 FABIOUS: No, no, it's not. It's a story of love. 171 00:08:00,545 --> 00:08:01,671 - THADEOUS: You don't have to tell it. - FABIOUS: Shh. 172 00:08:01,780 --> 00:08:02,838 If she doesn't want to tell it. 173 00:08:03,048 --> 00:08:05,608 FABIOUS: She will tell. This is a table full of your loved ones. 174 00:08:06,051 --> 00:08:07,541 BELLADONNA: Oh. Okay. 175 00:08:08,086 --> 00:08:09,815 I've been held captive by Leezar 176 00:08:09,921 --> 00:08:11,616 in the Tower of Disorder since I was but a child. 177 00:08:11,723 --> 00:08:14,021 Never knowing love nor human contact. 178 00:08:14,559 --> 00:08:15,890 (EXHALES) But I never gave up hope. 179 00:08:16,227 --> 00:08:19,924 Singing every day, praying that someday my hero would find me. 180 00:08:20,031 --> 00:08:21,555 And I did. 181 00:08:21,666 --> 00:08:23,964 We had just slaughtered the Cyclops. 182 00:08:24,169 --> 00:08:26,797 (ALL CHUCKLING) We were on our way home, and on the wind 183 00:08:27,005 --> 00:08:28,802 I heard the most beautiful song. 184 00:08:28,907 --> 00:08:29,896 (GIGGLES) 185 00:08:30,008 --> 00:08:33,375 Fascinating, really. May we take pause for one moment. 186 00:08:34,245 --> 00:08:35,269 Yes, sir. 187 00:08:35,380 --> 00:08:36,540 Look at Courtney's new haircut. 188 00:08:36,748 --> 00:08:39,342 Doesn't it make his head look like the tip of a penis? 189 00:08:39,451 --> 00:08:41,248 (LAUGHING) It's hilarious. 190 00:08:41,553 --> 00:08:42,747 Thadeous, please. 191 00:08:42,954 --> 00:08:44,353 What is your problem? 192 00:08:44,489 --> 00:08:47,049 You, Fabious, you're being selfish and greedy. 193 00:08:47,359 --> 00:08:49,054 Stealing all the attentions. 194 00:08:49,227 --> 00:08:51,923 Today is not just for you two. 195 00:08:52,030 --> 00:08:54,828 Today is Thundarian's birthday. 196 00:08:55,467 --> 00:08:57,094 Thundarian, is it your birthday? 197 00:08:57,235 --> 00:08:58,429 It's not my birthday. 198 00:08:58,636 --> 00:09:00,365 It's not Thundarian's birthday, Thadeous. 199 00:09:00,472 --> 00:09:01,632 TALLIOUS: Enough, enough. 200 00:09:01,740 --> 00:09:04,174 My heart's desire, what is this? 201 00:09:04,476 --> 00:09:07,411 No. That's a... We call that a fork, 202 00:09:07,512 --> 00:09:09,537 and you use that for your food. 203 00:09:09,647 --> 00:09:11,046 Right there. Fucking idiot. 204 00:09:11,149 --> 00:09:12,138 (LAUGHING) 205 00:09:12,250 --> 00:09:13,649 FABIOUS: Having spent years in the tower 206 00:09:13,752 --> 00:09:17,313 has made her ignorant to some of our customs and things in general. 207 00:09:17,689 --> 00:09:18,747 TALLIOUS: Why, yes, of course. 208 00:09:18,857 --> 00:09:19,983 If your mother were here today, 209 00:09:20,091 --> 00:09:22,355 she would be a very proud woman, Fabious. (EXCLAIMS IN DISGUST) 210 00:09:22,560 --> 00:09:23,720 FABIOUS: Thank you, Father. 211 00:09:23,928 --> 00:09:27,887 Which is why I ask your permission to marry her at once. 212 00:09:28,833 --> 00:09:30,664 The glory of romance! 213 00:09:31,002 --> 00:09:32,970 I call upon my criers to proclaim 214 00:09:33,071 --> 00:09:36,837 that tomorrow we'll see the greatest wedding this kingdom has ever known. 215 00:09:36,975 --> 00:09:40,035 And tonight, we celebrate! 216 00:09:40,278 --> 00:09:41,438 (ALL CHEERING) 217 00:09:43,631 --> 00:09:45,098 (DOGS BARKING) 218 00:09:45,799 --> 00:09:47,494 (FOLK MUSIC PLAYING) 219 00:09:52,205 --> 00:09:53,638 I don't like this. 220 00:09:53,740 --> 00:09:56,470 Courtney, will you make funny faces to entertain me? 221 00:09:57,077 --> 00:09:58,510 (LAUGHING) 222 00:10:00,747 --> 00:10:01,907 No. 223 00:10:02,115 --> 00:10:05,243 Never triangle face. I hate triangle face. It scares me. 224 00:10:05,452 --> 00:10:06,419 Apologies. 225 00:10:07,721 --> 00:10:08,779 Ah. 226 00:10:09,089 --> 00:10:11,114 Good evening, Your Royal Highness. 227 00:10:11,224 --> 00:10:12,213 COURTNEY: Julie. 228 00:10:12,426 --> 00:10:14,257 Hello, fucking Julie. 229 00:10:14,461 --> 00:10:18,056 What a wonderful, wonderful evening, sire. 230 00:10:18,532 --> 00:10:21,023 Yet another glorious achievement 231 00:10:21,134 --> 00:10:25,332 in the whole firmament of starring moments for your brother Fabious. 232 00:10:25,572 --> 00:10:29,668 (LAUGHS) We shall remember it for the rest of our lives. 233 00:10:32,145 --> 00:10:33,908 Isn't that amazing how he can talk 234 00:10:34,014 --> 00:10:35,743 and suck my cock at the same exact time? 235 00:10:35,949 --> 00:10:37,746 Yes, it is. Incredible. (LAUGHING) 236 00:10:38,351 --> 00:10:41,047 Oh, clean yourself up. 237 00:10:41,154 --> 00:10:42,678 Should have closed your eyes, Julie. 238 00:10:43,056 --> 00:10:45,820 I know your vulgarity masks your pain. 239 00:10:46,126 --> 00:10:47,423 No, it doesn't. 240 00:10:47,527 --> 00:10:49,722 I was trying to remember the last time we had 241 00:10:49,830 --> 00:10:52,628 one of these wonderful evenings for you, sir. 242 00:10:52,933 --> 00:10:54,992 Surely there must have been one 243 00:10:55,202 --> 00:10:59,332 somewhere in the history of this kingdom, of your illustrious life. 244 00:10:59,439 --> 00:11:01,930 There must've been some moment 245 00:11:02,175 --> 00:11:03,733 that we can all remember. 246 00:11:03,844 --> 00:11:05,778 And I'm trying to think now 247 00:11:06,513 --> 00:11:08,105 and there's nothing. 248 00:11:08,949 --> 00:11:12,214 Courtney, I think I've had enough of this foul party. 249 00:11:12,319 --> 00:11:13,308 Yes, sir. 250 00:11:13,420 --> 00:11:14,717 (JULIE LAUGHS MOCKINGLY) 251 00:11:16,490 --> 00:11:18,355 THADEOUS: Stupid Julie, I'll show him. 252 00:11:19,526 --> 00:11:21,357 I am Thadeous, 253 00:11:21,561 --> 00:11:25,088 the greatest sword fighting man to ever live. 254 00:11:25,298 --> 00:11:29,997 I will murder anyone whoever tries to insult me 255 00:11:30,103 --> 00:11:32,196 or challenge me. (SQUAWKING) 256 00:11:32,772 --> 00:11:35,935 Some balls you have, Simon, showing yourself to me. 257 00:11:36,176 --> 00:11:37,837 (CHITTERING) 258 00:11:38,111 --> 00:11:40,102 No matter what you say, we'll never be friends 259 00:11:40,213 --> 00:11:42,511 because I hate mechanical inventions 260 00:11:42,716 --> 00:11:44,013 and you know this. 261 00:11:44,117 --> 00:11:45,311 (CHITTERING) 262 00:11:45,418 --> 00:11:47,477 Wipe that smile off your face. 263 00:11:48,722 --> 00:11:50,280 Hey, Simon. 264 00:11:50,490 --> 00:11:53,653 You should swing from your hips, Brother. You'll get more leverage. 265 00:11:53,760 --> 00:11:55,785 Here, let me show you. 266 00:11:56,029 --> 00:11:56,996 Oh, god. 267 00:11:57,097 --> 00:11:59,691 Put your hands there, yeah, 268 00:11:59,900 --> 00:12:01,993 and swing. 269 00:12:02,202 --> 00:12:05,365 Gods, get off of me. I know how to use a sword. 270 00:12:05,605 --> 00:12:07,368 - Do you? - Yes. 271 00:12:07,574 --> 00:12:09,542 We'll see about that. 272 00:12:09,743 --> 00:12:11,506 Okay, enough. I don't want to do swords with you. 273 00:12:11,611 --> 00:12:12,635 I'm doing it by myself. 274 00:12:12,746 --> 00:12:14,145 Defend yourself, Brother! 275 00:12:14,247 --> 00:12:15,646 - Stop it. - There you go. 276 00:12:15,749 --> 00:12:16,738 Stop. 277 00:12:16,850 --> 00:12:18,317 Defend yourself! 278 00:12:18,518 --> 00:12:20,486 - (FABIOUS EXCLAIMING) - Stop it. 279 00:12:21,821 --> 00:12:22,810 Oh, shit! 280 00:12:22,923 --> 00:12:24,720 You just nicked my knuckles! 281 00:12:24,858 --> 00:12:27,656 Oh, you'll be all right. It's not as if I cut your head off or anything. 282 00:12:27,928 --> 00:12:29,987 Why would you bring that disgusting thing here? 283 00:12:30,196 --> 00:12:32,221 It's getting juices in our water supply. 284 00:12:32,432 --> 00:12:34,059 It's a souvenir of my kill. 285 00:12:34,367 --> 00:12:37,097 I always take one from a foe that's tasted the cold, 286 00:12:37,203 --> 00:12:39,364 unrelenting steel of my blade. 287 00:12:39,873 --> 00:12:41,773 Souvenir of your kill? 288 00:12:41,875 --> 00:12:45,743 That sounds like a rather stupid, bloodthirsty tradition. 289 00:12:47,247 --> 00:12:48,612 What's your problem? 290 00:12:48,715 --> 00:12:50,182 Why are you such a sourpuss? 291 00:12:50,283 --> 00:12:52,877 I'm not being a sourpuss. I just didn't wanna be at that celebrations. 292 00:12:54,470 --> 00:12:56,461 All I want is for you to be a part of this moment. 293 00:12:56,672 --> 00:12:59,163 I want you to be gay with me and father. 294 00:12:59,275 --> 00:13:01,402 I don't want to be gay with you two. 295 00:13:01,510 --> 00:13:02,499 (SIGHS) 296 00:13:02,611 --> 00:13:03,839 I'd rather just stay in here 297 00:13:03,946 --> 00:13:06,346 with my blade and fuck things up. 298 00:13:06,649 --> 00:13:07,843 Why would you say that? 299 00:13:07,950 --> 00:13:10,418 Because, Fabious, it's true. 300 00:13:12,054 --> 00:13:13,351 (GRUNTING) 301 00:13:14,089 --> 00:13:17,081 I'm sick and tired of everyone sucking up on your tits 302 00:13:17,192 --> 00:13:19,126 because you are to become king. 303 00:13:19,328 --> 00:13:22,593 All the while, no one gives two turtle shits about me. 304 00:13:22,965 --> 00:13:27,368 But Thaddy, first borns like me, we become king. 305 00:13:27,469 --> 00:13:30,768 Second borns, you can be whatever you want to be. 306 00:13:30,973 --> 00:13:32,770 I want to be king. 307 00:13:33,709 --> 00:13:35,233 Maybe we can both be king. 308 00:13:35,477 --> 00:13:38,935 No, I want to be king by myself. 309 00:13:39,148 --> 00:13:41,013 Well, cheer up, Brother. 310 00:13:41,116 --> 00:13:42,481 I have something else that you can be. 311 00:13:43,018 --> 00:13:44,576 What? 312 00:13:44,687 --> 00:13:46,314 Best man at my wedding. 313 00:13:46,855 --> 00:13:49,847 I can think of no one else I'd want by my side 314 00:13:50,292 --> 00:13:52,920 as I sing my vow passionately into her eyes. 315 00:13:53,028 --> 00:13:55,360 Sounds tedious and boring. 316 00:13:55,698 --> 00:13:57,290 If I'm not mistaken, it's tradition 317 00:13:57,399 --> 00:14:00,300 that the best man gets to finger the bridesmaids. 318 00:14:00,402 --> 00:14:03,166 Really? I've never heard of this tradition. 319 00:14:03,872 --> 00:14:05,066 (SNIFFS) 320 00:14:07,810 --> 00:14:09,277 You have a fucking deal. 321 00:14:09,378 --> 00:14:11,608 Oh, you're gonna be so handsome! 322 00:14:11,714 --> 00:14:14,376 Who's gonna be the most handsome best man? 323 00:14:15,017 --> 00:14:16,211 Probably me. 324 00:14:16,318 --> 00:14:19,287 Who's the prince with the most dashing moustache? 325 00:14:19,888 --> 00:14:21,014 Me. 326 00:14:21,123 --> 00:14:23,387 Who gives the warmest hugs? 327 00:14:23,492 --> 00:14:24,823 Me, of course. 328 00:14:25,494 --> 00:14:26,984 I love you, Thadeous. 329 00:14:28,630 --> 00:14:30,689 Okay, that's cool. 330 00:14:31,700 --> 00:14:34,999 MALE ANNOUNCER: All gather for the royal wedding! 331 00:14:35,104 --> 00:14:36,662 (ALL CHATTERING) 332 00:14:48,751 --> 00:14:51,379 Hello there, best man. 333 00:14:51,854 --> 00:14:52,821 Best man? 334 00:14:52,921 --> 00:14:55,822 If he wanted a best man, he should have chosen me. 335 00:14:55,924 --> 00:14:57,949 How many quests have I been on with Fabious? 336 00:14:58,060 --> 00:14:59,027 - Countless. - Mmm. 337 00:14:59,862 --> 00:15:03,093 I gave my hand to save his life on the battlefield. 338 00:15:03,198 --> 00:15:06,065 And yet he chooses Thadeous as his best man. 339 00:15:06,335 --> 00:15:09,793 That sorry sack of shit. 340 00:15:10,005 --> 00:15:12,735 Such a poor excuse for a prince. 341 00:15:12,941 --> 00:15:16,502 He's nothing more than a self-entitled, rotten child! 342 00:15:16,879 --> 00:15:17,846 MANIOUS: Idiot. 343 00:15:20,115 --> 00:15:21,946 - You look beautiful. - Thank you. 344 00:15:22,151 --> 00:15:23,118 FABIOUS: Belladonna... 345 00:15:23,919 --> 00:15:25,887 Oh, my love. 346 00:15:28,924 --> 00:15:32,223 Oh, Fabious, I can't wait until the cervix is over, 347 00:15:32,327 --> 00:15:34,386 and to lie together as one: 348 00:15:34,930 --> 00:15:36,192 No, the service. 349 00:15:36,298 --> 00:15:41,463 The cervix is a circular wing of muscles that contracts or expands. 350 00:15:41,703 --> 00:15:43,364 It's up in your vagina. 351 00:15:43,639 --> 00:15:46,164 That's where my penis will go after the wedding. 352 00:15:46,275 --> 00:15:47,264 (CHUCKLES) 353 00:15:47,376 --> 00:15:49,037 Have you not consummated your love? 354 00:15:49,144 --> 00:15:50,133 FABIOUS: Not yet. 355 00:15:50,546 --> 00:15:52,207 Belladonna has never been with a man 356 00:15:52,314 --> 00:15:55,306 so we've decided to preserve her purity till after the wedding. 357 00:15:56,151 --> 00:15:58,813 She's given me this ribbon from her fair hair. 358 00:15:58,921 --> 00:16:02,550 To hold on to until we can be together in a sex-way. 359 00:16:03,492 --> 00:16:04,891 Yes. 360 00:16:06,762 --> 00:16:08,354 TALLIOUS: Enough, enough. 361 00:16:08,497 --> 00:16:09,486 (SIGHS) 362 00:16:09,598 --> 00:16:11,225 If Thadeous wishes to play forgetful 363 00:16:11,333 --> 00:16:12,800 on his brother's day of days, 364 00:16:12,935 --> 00:16:14,493 then wait we shall not. 365 00:16:14,770 --> 00:16:18,228 I can't get married without my brother. He's my best man. 366 00:16:18,373 --> 00:16:21,501 His time has passed. Pick another best man. 367 00:16:21,610 --> 00:16:22,634 No. 368 00:16:22,744 --> 00:16:25,474 - Julie, you be best man. - Here you are. 369 00:16:25,781 --> 00:16:26,805 Godsdammit. 370 00:16:29,017 --> 00:16:32,077 THADEOUS: Oh, Brendan, you trolls have it so easy. 371 00:16:32,454 --> 00:16:35,821 Out here playing recklessly in your beautiful mud. 372 00:16:36,024 --> 00:16:39,323 Eating your scraps of horse meats and crumbs. 373 00:16:40,162 --> 00:16:41,959 - Green grass. - Green grass. 374 00:16:42,464 --> 00:16:45,092 And do tell, how do you get so dirty? 375 00:16:45,567 --> 00:16:49,298 You just take the earth and rub it upon your face? 376 00:16:49,805 --> 00:16:51,102 Your Highness, 377 00:16:52,508 --> 00:16:55,568 the wedding has... Hello. The wedding has started. 378 00:16:55,677 --> 00:16:57,702 I do not care. 379 00:16:58,013 --> 00:17:00,311 I'd rather stay with this fine gentleman. 380 00:17:00,482 --> 00:17:01,574 Hiding here with my true friends. 381 00:17:01,683 --> 00:17:02,741 Yes. 382 00:17:02,851 --> 00:17:06,947 Let the whole entire wedding wonder and worry where I am. 383 00:17:09,992 --> 00:17:15,055 (SINGING) This is the day that I've been waiting for 384 00:17:17,032 --> 00:17:20,468 Sand in the kingdom 385 00:17:20,602 --> 00:17:23,298 Our love is born 386 00:17:24,439 --> 00:17:29,809 Flowing from the ocean to the moons 387 00:17:32,014 --> 00:17:37,008 Your heart now I hold 388 00:17:39,855 --> 00:17:45,191 (SINGING OFF-KEY) You have a beauty I can't ignore 389 00:17:46,895 --> 00:17:52,026 Bastion of all I do adore 390 00:17:54,202 --> 00:17:57,638 BOTH: Giving this moment 391 00:17:57,873 --> 00:18:01,434 Our love that's true 392 00:18:02,444 --> 00:18:07,438 Our hearts now are one 393 00:18:11,820 --> 00:18:12,878 (LEEZAR APPLAUDING) 394 00:18:12,988 --> 00:18:14,751 - LEEZAR: Bravo! - (ALL MURMURING) 395 00:18:15,390 --> 00:18:16,914 Bravo! 396 00:18:17,326 --> 00:18:18,759 Bravo! 397 00:18:18,860 --> 00:18:21,351 Reveal yourself, stranger. Are you lost? 398 00:18:21,563 --> 00:18:25,829 A thousand pardons. I mean not to intrude on such a joyous occasion. 399 00:18:26,835 --> 00:18:29,167 However, today I just could not help myself. 400 00:18:30,889 --> 00:18:31,583 - Leezar! - (GASPS) 401 00:18:31,689 --> 00:18:33,680 You're not welcome here, devil! 402 00:18:33,991 --> 00:18:35,049 (BLOWS) 403 00:18:37,061 --> 00:18:39,052 If you come in peace, say so, 404 00:18:39,163 --> 00:18:41,427 otherwise prepare to meet your doom. 405 00:18:41,532 --> 00:18:43,397 LEEZAR: Oh, brave Fabious. 406 00:18:43,701 --> 00:18:47,637 You murdered my Cyclops. But I have other perils in store for you. 407 00:18:48,439 --> 00:18:51,101 Ones that are beyond the bounds of your imagination. 408 00:18:51,308 --> 00:18:52,639 One, in particular, 409 00:18:52,877 --> 00:18:54,572 involving an ancient prophecy destined 410 00:18:54,679 --> 00:18:57,239 to be fulfilled by a powerful warlock, 411 00:18:57,348 --> 00:18:58,406 me: 412 00:18:58,749 --> 00:19:02,082 And, of course, a very beautiful virgin that looks just like 413 00:19:02,186 --> 00:19:03,153 (GASPS) 414 00:19:04,522 --> 00:19:05,511 - her. - (CROWD GASPS IN HORROR) 415 00:19:05,823 --> 00:19:09,554 I was keeping that one for something very special. 416 00:19:09,760 --> 00:19:13,287 And I dare say it was rude of you to steal her from me. 417 00:19:13,497 --> 00:19:14,759 Now I'm here to get her back. 418 00:19:15,032 --> 00:19:17,557 And just how do you plan on doing that? 419 00:19:17,735 --> 00:19:18,759 Magic, 420 00:19:18,869 --> 00:19:20,234 (CRACKING NECK) 421 00:19:20,337 --> 00:19:21,429 motherfucker. 422 00:19:21,639 --> 00:19:22,663 TALLIOUS: Not a moment more. 423 00:19:22,773 --> 00:19:24,673 - Knights, to arms! - Take him! 424 00:19:26,677 --> 00:19:28,008 (ALL SCREAMING) 425 00:19:28,612 --> 00:19:31,706 Do you honestly think your band of worms can stop me? 426 00:19:31,816 --> 00:19:32,976 (GRUNTS) 427 00:19:36,287 --> 00:19:38,812 Arise therefore, my mothers! 428 00:19:38,923 --> 00:19:39,890 (GRUNTS) 429 00:19:47,465 --> 00:19:48,432 Watch out! 430 00:19:57,508 --> 00:19:58,475 (YELLING) 431 00:20:03,447 --> 00:20:04,607 Come with me. 432 00:20:06,016 --> 00:20:07,483 Leezar! 433 00:20:12,957 --> 00:20:14,117 (GRUNTING) 434 00:20:18,195 --> 00:20:20,755 I shall not go back to that dreadful tower! 435 00:20:20,865 --> 00:20:21,923 Look into my eyes! 436 00:20:22,333 --> 00:20:24,961 You will learn to love me! Do you understand? 437 00:20:25,069 --> 00:20:26,400 (GROANING) 438 00:20:29,907 --> 00:20:31,101 FABIOUS: Come on. 439 00:20:31,208 --> 00:20:32,641 (LAUGHING) 440 00:20:41,318 --> 00:20:43,081 Impossible. 441 00:20:43,854 --> 00:20:44,946 (SHRIEKS) 442 00:20:50,494 --> 00:20:52,121 (SCREAMING) 443 00:20:52,963 --> 00:20:54,487 (ALL LAUGHING) 444 00:20:57,334 --> 00:20:59,325 Farewell, Kingdom of Mourne. 445 00:20:59,436 --> 00:21:03,065 As always, it has been my pleasure. 446 00:21:03,174 --> 00:21:04,607 (EXCLAIMING) 447 00:21:06,744 --> 00:21:07,836 (SCREAMS) 448 00:21:16,353 --> 00:21:17,752 (PANTING) 449 00:21:20,958 --> 00:21:22,425 COURTNEY: I thought it was from riding sheep, 450 00:21:22,526 --> 00:21:24,221 but it turns out just to be an ear infection. 451 00:21:24,328 --> 00:21:25,352 (LAUGHING) 452 00:21:25,462 --> 00:21:26,429 You fucker! 453 00:21:28,332 --> 00:21:29,390 Good times. 454 00:21:29,500 --> 00:21:31,127 No one get up. I'm very tired. 455 00:21:31,235 --> 00:21:32,793 I'm going straight to my bed chambers. 456 00:21:33,170 --> 00:21:35,263 Brother, thank god you're alive. 457 00:21:35,472 --> 00:21:36,939 When you didn't show up for the wedding, I feared the worst. 458 00:21:37,041 --> 00:21:38,030 Why are you crying? 459 00:21:39,726 --> 00:21:41,284 Leezar has taken my love. 460 00:21:41,494 --> 00:21:42,620 - What? - Yes. 461 00:21:42,795 --> 00:21:46,128 So, your brother is about to embark on yet another quest. 462 00:21:46,499 --> 00:21:48,091 This time to rescue Belladonna 463 00:21:48,201 --> 00:21:50,192 and rid the land of that loathsome wretch 464 00:21:50,303 --> 00:21:51,395 once and for all. 465 00:21:51,571 --> 00:21:53,562 Wow, how noble of him. 466 00:21:54,007 --> 00:21:57,306 Well, it was nice to see you, as short as the visit was. 467 00:21:57,410 --> 00:22:00,971 I look forward to hearing about it. Good luck and good bye. 468 00:22:01,281 --> 00:22:04,148 Thadeous, this is Fabious' 28th quest. 469 00:22:04,884 --> 00:22:06,374 How many have you been on? 470 00:22:06,486 --> 00:22:09,080 Courtney, how many quests have I completed? 471 00:22:09,222 --> 00:22:10,348 Uh... 472 00:22:10,723 --> 00:22:12,918 The answer is none. 473 00:22:13,059 --> 00:22:15,619 It is finally time for you to become a man. 474 00:22:15,762 --> 00:22:18,663 You must journey with your brother to rescue his bride. 475 00:22:18,932 --> 00:22:20,593 THADEOUS: Father, you can't be serious. 476 00:22:20,733 --> 00:22:21,893 If you want me to go on to a quest, 477 00:22:22,001 --> 00:22:23,366 then let's start with something easy, 478 00:22:23,469 --> 00:22:26,097 like boiling a chicken or beating off in front of a Pegasus. 479 00:22:26,205 --> 00:22:27,172 Elementary things. 480 00:22:28,892 --> 00:22:32,293 Look around you at the harm that has befallen this castle! 481 00:22:34,764 --> 00:22:36,789 This quest is your last chance 482 00:22:36,899 --> 00:22:39,333 to prove to me and the kingdom 483 00:22:39,435 --> 00:22:42,495 that you are a man worthy to bear the family crest, 484 00:22:42,605 --> 00:22:45,768 and to show that at your core, you are not rotten, 485 00:22:46,308 --> 00:22:49,539 but you are brave, and honorable, and noble. 486 00:22:49,745 --> 00:22:52,578 All the qualities expected of a prince. 487 00:22:52,682 --> 00:22:53,944 The choice is yours. 488 00:22:54,283 --> 00:22:56,843 Either journey with your brother and the Knights Elite, 489 00:22:56,952 --> 00:22:59,750 or you can face banishment from the kingdom. 490 00:23:00,589 --> 00:23:01,647 Shit. 491 00:23:12,368 --> 00:23:13,665 (HORSES NEIGHING) 492 00:23:23,512 --> 00:23:24,672 (SIMON SCREECHING) 493 00:23:27,683 --> 00:23:28,980 You see, Courtney, 494 00:23:29,085 --> 00:23:32,213 I alone understand how to properly prepare for a quest. 495 00:23:32,521 --> 00:23:36,457 Masculine garments, proper, good collie to smoke upon. 496 00:23:36,659 --> 00:23:38,320 How is Steven doing? 497 00:23:38,527 --> 00:23:40,324 He looks like he's stoned, sir. 498 00:23:40,529 --> 00:23:41,791 Fabious has Simon, 499 00:23:41,897 --> 00:23:45,424 and now I have Steven, a far superior creature companion. 500 00:23:45,534 --> 00:23:46,796 Wouldn't you agree? 501 00:23:47,002 --> 00:23:49,664 He will fare very well, indeed, I'm sure, Your Highness. 502 00:23:49,772 --> 00:23:52,570 I do hope this adventure is not too stressful or boring. 503 00:23:52,708 --> 00:23:57,008 Either way I intend to get properly fucked up if no one disagrees. 504 00:24:14,029 --> 00:24:16,896 Belladonna, wake up. Wake up. 505 00:24:17,099 --> 00:24:19,090 Who is that? Where am I? 506 00:24:19,235 --> 00:24:21,066 'Tis I, Fabious. Your love. 507 00:24:21,170 --> 00:24:22,330 (GASPS) 508 00:24:22,772 --> 00:24:23,739 Fabious? 509 00:24:23,939 --> 00:24:25,668 You're still in Leezar's lair. 510 00:24:25,775 --> 00:24:28,471 But fear not, I'm here to rescue you. 511 00:24:28,577 --> 00:24:30,442 Fabious, it's really you. 512 00:24:30,546 --> 00:24:32,571 I knew you'd come to find me. 513 00:24:32,848 --> 00:24:34,713 (LAUGHING RAUCOUSLY) 514 00:24:38,854 --> 00:24:42,688 I can't do this. I can't do it. It's so mean. 515 00:24:43,726 --> 00:24:47,526 You should've seen the look on your face. It's me! 516 00:24:48,297 --> 00:24:49,821 You're still a prisoner. 517 00:24:50,032 --> 00:24:52,694 I've seen a beautiful world beyond this prison, 518 00:24:52,802 --> 00:24:54,997 and I count the hours till I escape. 519 00:24:55,304 --> 00:24:57,169 I wouldn't be so sure of that. 520 00:24:57,273 --> 00:25:01,403 Lookie there. The twin moons drawing slowly together. 521 00:25:01,710 --> 00:25:04,178 Time moving them closer. 522 00:25:04,380 --> 00:25:08,214 Just as time moves you and I closer together. 523 00:25:08,551 --> 00:25:11,714 And when the two moons unite, so shall we. 524 00:25:12,121 --> 00:25:15,613 Perhaps, keeping you in this tower has left you ignorant. 525 00:25:15,724 --> 00:25:18,158 You're so easily deceived. 526 00:25:18,460 --> 00:25:22,419 For example, I have heard that your Prince Fabious 527 00:25:22,631 --> 00:25:25,691 has made his bed recklessly with many maidens. 528 00:25:27,837 --> 00:25:32,501 And I heard that he has fungi on his genitalia as a result. 529 00:25:32,741 --> 00:25:35,107 Also, he organizes orgies 530 00:25:35,444 --> 00:25:38,174 with wenches and barbarians alike 531 00:25:38,280 --> 00:25:42,683 and he takes sperm on him and gives it to women freely. 532 00:25:43,118 --> 00:25:45,052 Spilling his seed willy-nilly 533 00:25:45,254 --> 00:25:48,417 as he makes his way through that orgy. 534 00:25:48,691 --> 00:25:50,682 I don't believe you. 535 00:25:50,826 --> 00:25:54,694 He is not the dashing young man you believe him to be. 536 00:25:55,030 --> 00:25:55,997 So 537 00:25:57,833 --> 00:26:01,735 these are the harsh realities of the outside world. 538 00:26:03,706 --> 00:26:05,333 Welcome home. 539 00:26:08,210 --> 00:26:10,508 SOLDIER: Halt! Steady. 540 00:26:14,083 --> 00:26:15,050 Oh. 541 00:26:15,217 --> 00:26:17,242 Sorry to disturb you two love birds 542 00:26:17,453 --> 00:26:20,217 but we've arrived at the home of the Wize Wizard. 543 00:26:20,422 --> 00:26:21,855 Who the hell is the Wize Wizard? 544 00:26:22,157 --> 00:26:23,954 He's an ancient seer who helps many 545 00:26:24,059 --> 00:26:25,822 on their quest with added insight. 546 00:26:25,928 --> 00:26:28,897 Great. Well, let me know how it goes. 547 00:26:29,098 --> 00:26:31,032 Leave him in his carriage, Fabious. 548 00:26:31,133 --> 00:26:33,363 You and I will seek counsel with the Wize Wizard. 549 00:26:33,469 --> 00:26:34,493 No. 550 00:26:34,603 --> 00:26:37,868 Come, Brother. This is the first stop on your first quest. 551 00:26:37,973 --> 00:26:40,498 We shall go together. 552 00:26:46,749 --> 00:26:48,182 (ARMOR SQUEAKING) 553 00:26:50,920 --> 00:26:52,251 (GRUNTING) 554 00:26:52,354 --> 00:26:53,378 Brother, 555 00:26:53,589 --> 00:26:55,181 you look ravishing in that armor, 556 00:26:55,291 --> 00:26:57,452 but I don't think you'll need it. 557 00:26:57,626 --> 00:27:00,459 The Wize Wizard is a peaceful, little old man. 558 00:27:01,330 --> 00:27:03,389 I'm wearing it. You're just being jealous. 559 00:27:03,599 --> 00:27:04,588 Shit! 560 00:27:04,700 --> 00:27:05,667 Thadeous! 561 00:27:07,269 --> 00:27:08,827 Fuck. 562 00:27:10,339 --> 00:27:13,035 Hello? Anyone home? 563 00:27:15,778 --> 00:27:18,838 THADEOUS: Looks as if someone is cultivating glorious herbs in here. 564 00:27:18,948 --> 00:27:20,848 FABIOUS: Hey, Wize Wizard, is that you over there? 565 00:27:21,183 --> 00:27:24,710 WIZE WIZARD: Who dares enter my den? 566 00:27:25,387 --> 00:27:28,982 It is I, Prince Fabious and my brother, Prince Thadeous. 567 00:27:29,191 --> 00:27:31,056 We come to seek counsel. 568 00:27:31,193 --> 00:27:33,593 Come, come. Give me kisses. 569 00:27:36,832 --> 00:27:38,094 (MOANING) 570 00:27:42,071 --> 00:27:43,834 Kiss him. 571 00:27:43,973 --> 00:27:44,940 Fuck, no. 572 00:27:45,040 --> 00:27:46,029 Pretty please. 573 00:27:46,141 --> 00:27:47,369 Kiss it on the mouth. 574 00:27:47,943 --> 00:27:49,877 For the quest. 575 00:27:50,045 --> 00:27:52,309 I do it every time I come. 576 00:27:54,984 --> 00:27:58,044 Hello. Nice to meet you. 577 00:27:59,521 --> 00:28:00,579 (MOANING) 578 00:28:01,290 --> 00:28:02,689 Oh, god. 579 00:28:02,891 --> 00:28:04,358 Sit, sit. 580 00:28:04,460 --> 00:28:05,518 Sit. 581 00:28:05,627 --> 00:28:09,586 Fabious has been coming here since he was a boy. 582 00:28:09,798 --> 00:28:11,857 You did this when you were a child. 583 00:28:11,967 --> 00:28:12,991 FABIOUS: Yes! 584 00:28:13,302 --> 00:28:14,894 We had great times, didn't we? 585 00:28:15,270 --> 00:28:17,261 Yes, yes, we did. 586 00:28:17,373 --> 00:28:18,362 (WIZE WIZARD CHUCKLES) 587 00:28:18,474 --> 00:28:20,237 You would kiss him? 588 00:28:20,342 --> 00:28:21,707 WIZE WIZARD: Mmm-hmm. 589 00:28:21,810 --> 00:28:24,574 Yeah, sometimes we would do other things. 590 00:28:24,747 --> 00:28:26,408 Like what? 591 00:28:26,648 --> 00:28:29,776 When I was younger, we'd take our shirts off and jump on the bed. 592 00:28:29,885 --> 00:28:32,445 Playful secrets. 593 00:28:33,322 --> 00:28:34,289 Don't tell father. 594 00:28:34,390 --> 00:28:35,379 WIZE WIZARD: Hmm. 595 00:28:35,591 --> 00:28:37,821 Breathe deeply of these herbs 596 00:28:37,926 --> 00:28:39,723 and share a vision with me. 597 00:28:39,828 --> 00:28:40,852 FABIOUS: Of course. 598 00:28:40,963 --> 00:28:41,930 (CLEARS THROAT) 599 00:28:43,899 --> 00:28:45,230 (CHUCKLING) 600 00:28:46,235 --> 00:28:48,931 Yes. Allow me to puff as well. 601 00:28:49,038 --> 00:28:50,198 WIZE WIZARD: Hmm. 602 00:28:50,806 --> 00:28:52,296 (SIGHS) 603 00:28:53,142 --> 00:28:55,906 (WHISTLES) Those are some powerful herbs. 604 00:28:56,111 --> 00:28:58,136 Giving me dark visions. 605 00:28:58,347 --> 00:28:59,837 Shall we pack this again? 606 00:28:59,948 --> 00:29:02,439 I'm not getting visions. I'm not sure if it's working, Wizard. 607 00:29:02,551 --> 00:29:03,540 (GROANING) 608 00:29:03,652 --> 00:29:06,143 Visions. Visions. 609 00:29:06,288 --> 00:29:08,552 Thadeous, are you seeing what I'm seeing? 610 00:29:08,757 --> 00:29:09,951 You making a fool yourself. 611 00:29:10,059 --> 00:29:11,526 Handle your shit, Fabious, please. 612 00:29:11,627 --> 00:29:12,753 No, I can't. 613 00:29:14,063 --> 00:29:16,361 Please, interpret these visions, Wizard. 614 00:29:16,632 --> 00:29:19,692 Prophecies foretell of an evil wizard 615 00:29:19,835 --> 00:29:22,463 laying his seed inside a virgin 616 00:29:22,571 --> 00:29:24,801 under the eclipse of the two moons. 617 00:29:25,174 --> 00:29:27,699 What? What evil prophecy is this? 618 00:29:27,810 --> 00:29:29,243 The child she would spawn 619 00:29:29,344 --> 00:29:31,869 is said to be a dragon most powerful. 620 00:29:32,181 --> 00:29:36,277 Ew. Leezar wants to make love to Belladonna to create a dragon? 621 00:29:36,385 --> 00:29:38,444 - That's fucking disgusting. - (FABIOUS GROANS) 622 00:29:38,587 --> 00:29:39,884 FABIOUS: I cannot let this happen. 623 00:29:40,155 --> 00:29:41,281 When is this eclipse? 624 00:29:41,390 --> 00:29:43,017 In five nights' time, 625 00:29:43,358 --> 00:29:47,385 but you will need an enchanted blade to do this warlock in. 626 00:29:47,496 --> 00:29:50,056 A blade made of unicorn horn. 627 00:29:50,432 --> 00:29:53,299 Say where I can find such a sword and it shall be mine. 628 00:29:53,402 --> 00:29:57,236 It rests in the depths of the most perilous hidden labyrinth. 629 00:29:57,606 --> 00:30:00,040 Just beyond Muldiss Darton. 630 00:30:00,242 --> 00:30:01,300 Muldiss Darton. 631 00:30:01,510 --> 00:30:03,978 Well, what is Muldiss Darton? 632 00:30:04,179 --> 00:30:05,806 It's a place of legend. 633 00:30:06,048 --> 00:30:07,606 (EXHALES) 634 00:30:13,204 --> 00:30:15,468 FABIOUS: Oh. Powerful magic. 635 00:30:15,639 --> 00:30:18,301 This crooked compass will catch the light 636 00:30:18,409 --> 00:30:21,537 and point the way to the labyrinth's location. 637 00:30:21,746 --> 00:30:23,043 Be warned, 638 00:30:23,147 --> 00:30:27,083 they say the walls of this maze drive men to madness. 639 00:30:27,284 --> 00:30:29,411 But if you can find your way, 640 00:30:29,520 --> 00:30:31,784 the blade will be yours. 641 00:30:32,957 --> 00:30:34,822 Thank you, Wize Wizard. 642 00:30:34,925 --> 00:30:38,156 Not so fast. First you must answer a riddle. 643 00:30:38,496 --> 00:30:43,433 What journey be long and twisted and sensitive at hand? 644 00:30:43,634 --> 00:30:48,367 To what end must man go to discover the depths of his ecstasy? 645 00:30:48,939 --> 00:30:51,203 Think hard, strong warriors. (CHUCKLES) 646 00:30:52,109 --> 00:30:53,542 Fuck, I know this. 647 00:30:53,644 --> 00:30:54,633 Oh. (CONTINUES CHUCKLING) 648 00:30:54,745 --> 00:30:55,734 FABIOUS: I've got it! 649 00:30:56,313 --> 00:31:00,977 You want us to twist what is long with our sensitive hands. 650 00:31:01,285 --> 00:31:03,082 He wants us to jerk him off. 651 00:31:03,287 --> 00:31:05,812 Just punch the tip and twist it. 652 00:31:05,923 --> 00:31:08,892 Yes, but we are not going to do that. 653 00:31:09,593 --> 00:31:12,653 If it's for the quest, we will do what needs to be done. 654 00:31:12,763 --> 00:31:13,957 (CHUCKLING) 655 00:31:14,598 --> 00:31:17,931 I'll work the tip, you tickle his balls. 656 00:31:19,003 --> 00:31:20,231 (MOANING) 657 00:31:24,575 --> 00:31:25,542 Yuck! 658 00:31:26,177 --> 00:31:27,166 Pervert. 659 00:31:27,278 --> 00:31:28,336 Did you get any information? 660 00:31:28,546 --> 00:31:30,571 Let's just make camp. 661 00:31:30,681 --> 00:31:33,616 Sick. This quest sucks. 662 00:31:34,652 --> 00:31:36,051 It used to be you that joined him. 663 00:31:36,153 --> 00:31:37,279 Yes. 664 00:31:39,256 --> 00:31:42,248 Don't worry. All will be well. 665 00:31:46,730 --> 00:31:47,788 Ha! 666 00:31:49,099 --> 00:31:50,157 (CHIRPING) 667 00:31:50,267 --> 00:31:51,461 (GROANING) 668 00:31:51,569 --> 00:31:54,094 Attentions please, warriors. 669 00:31:54,305 --> 00:31:55,932 I propose a toast. 670 00:31:56,140 --> 00:31:58,700 Let us drink till thine asses are drunk. 671 00:31:58,909 --> 00:32:00,809 Brother, we do not celebrate 672 00:32:00,911 --> 00:32:02,708 until we complete the quest at hand. 673 00:32:02,813 --> 00:32:04,405 It is the code of the Knights Elite. 674 00:32:04,515 --> 00:32:07,746 What of my code where we drink like men? 675 00:32:07,852 --> 00:32:09,046 Thadeous, we have some traditions 676 00:32:09,153 --> 00:32:10,814 of our own out here on the road. 677 00:32:11,789 --> 00:32:14,690 Manious, prepare the warrior's tidings, if you will. 678 00:32:14,892 --> 00:32:19,090 If it is the first night of your first quest, well... 679 00:32:24,501 --> 00:32:25,468 MANIOUS: Here it comes. 680 00:32:25,736 --> 00:32:26,725 (GRUNTING) 681 00:32:26,837 --> 00:32:28,270 THADEOUS: Disgusting. 682 00:32:30,274 --> 00:32:32,242 Feast upon the heart of the beast. 683 00:32:32,343 --> 00:32:33,935 No, thank you, I'm not hungry. 684 00:32:34,044 --> 00:32:36,410 It is a tradition among men: 685 00:32:36,780 --> 00:32:38,577 - Eat it. - Eat it. 686 00:32:38,782 --> 00:32:40,841 - BOREMONT: Eat it. - Eat it. 687 00:32:40,951 --> 00:32:44,648 - KNIGHTS: (CHANTING) - Eat it! Eat it! Eat it! 688 00:32:57,067 --> 00:32:58,329 (ALL LAUGHING) 689 00:32:59,203 --> 00:33:00,227 (CHITTERING) 690 00:33:01,639 --> 00:33:03,539 You fuckers! That's not funny! 691 00:33:03,807 --> 00:33:05,240 You're not supposed to eat it. 692 00:33:05,476 --> 00:33:06,636 You all were chanting. 693 00:33:06,744 --> 00:33:09,542 Maybe there's some donkey cock in your carriage! 694 00:33:09,780 --> 00:33:12,146 Fuck you, Boremont! Manious, fuck you! 695 00:33:12,316 --> 00:33:13,510 I hate all of you. 696 00:33:13,617 --> 00:33:14,948 Thadeous! 697 00:33:15,352 --> 00:33:16,478 Come back. 698 00:33:17,054 --> 00:33:19,181 Thadeous, come here. 699 00:33:21,859 --> 00:33:23,053 (RETCHING) 700 00:33:27,665 --> 00:33:28,893 Ah. 701 00:33:34,338 --> 00:33:36,067 (CHANTING SPELL) 702 00:33:46,517 --> 00:33:47,814 Dark master, 703 00:33:48,018 --> 00:33:50,953 it is I, Julie. 704 00:33:51,088 --> 00:33:52,077 (URINATING) 705 00:33:52,189 --> 00:33:54,123 We have crossed the hazel meadow, 706 00:33:54,325 --> 00:33:57,522 and are now taking rest at the Cliffs of Kuneman. 707 00:33:57,728 --> 00:34:00,993 Now that the Princes of Mourne have left their stronghold 708 00:34:01,198 --> 00:34:03,462 their vulnerabilities are in your hands. 709 00:34:03,667 --> 00:34:04,793 My hands. 710 00:34:04,935 --> 00:34:06,562 Bring Prince Fabious to me alive. 711 00:34:06,837 --> 00:34:09,567 I would like him to witness as I impregnate his love. 712 00:34:09,773 --> 00:34:10,899 (LAUGHS) Impregnate. 713 00:34:11,041 --> 00:34:12,508 As for Thadeous and his boy, 714 00:34:12,609 --> 00:34:16,136 toss them from the Cliffs of Kuneman. They're useless. 715 00:34:17,614 --> 00:34:18,581 Fart. 716 00:34:20,299 --> 00:34:22,164 Knock, knock. May I come in? 717 00:34:22,367 --> 00:34:25,029 No, leave me alone. Get out of here. 718 00:34:25,170 --> 00:34:29,402 Thadeous, you must calm down. It's over. 719 00:34:29,674 --> 00:34:32,142 You ate the heart, you passed the initiation. 720 00:34:32,243 --> 00:34:33,210 Passed? 721 00:34:33,311 --> 00:34:35,302 You made me look stupid in front of all your friends. 722 00:34:35,513 --> 00:34:38,004 And don't think I'm not telling father because I'm going to. 723 00:34:38,116 --> 00:34:41,381 Thadeous, we were just having some fun, and it was perfect. 724 00:34:41,586 --> 00:34:43,816 Now they know you're not to be fucked with. 725 00:34:44,022 --> 00:34:45,990 Excuse me, sir, sorry for the intrusion. 726 00:34:46,091 --> 00:34:48,355 I have just witnessed a most disturbing incident. 727 00:34:48,560 --> 00:34:50,357 FABIOUS: There must be a misunderstanding. 728 00:34:50,462 --> 00:34:52,293 Julie is my most trusted confidant. 729 00:34:52,397 --> 00:34:53,625 (LAUGHS) Julie is an idiot. 730 00:34:53,731 --> 00:34:55,096 No, he's not. He's a gentleman. 731 00:34:55,233 --> 00:34:56,757 Julie is what, Your Highness? 732 00:34:57,035 --> 00:34:58,400 I'm not sure, Julie. 733 00:34:58,503 --> 00:35:00,664 Courtney said he saw some suspicious behavior. 734 00:35:00,939 --> 00:35:05,035 You, I saw you talking with Leezar. 735 00:35:06,010 --> 00:35:07,204 (LAUGHING) 736 00:35:07,445 --> 00:35:10,903 How dare you watch me in my private moments. 737 00:35:11,583 --> 00:35:13,016 (CASTING SPELL) 738 00:35:13,685 --> 00:35:15,050 (ALL GROANING) 739 00:35:15,453 --> 00:35:16,511 (LAUGHING MANIACALLY) 740 00:35:16,621 --> 00:35:18,054 He's stolen my vision. 741 00:35:18,323 --> 00:35:19,347 FABIOUS: Get him, Courtney! 742 00:35:21,626 --> 00:35:22,615 Come here! 743 00:35:22,727 --> 00:35:23,887 (GRUNTING) 744 00:35:25,730 --> 00:35:26,754 You old beast. 745 00:35:27,499 --> 00:35:29,330 Courtney, just restrain him with all your might. 746 00:35:29,434 --> 00:35:30,924 No, slay him! 747 00:35:31,269 --> 00:35:32,258 Murder him! 748 00:35:32,437 --> 00:35:33,699 Die of me. 749 00:35:38,109 --> 00:35:39,406 What? 750 00:35:39,611 --> 00:35:42,079 (GRUNTING) Don't move, you're surrounded. 751 00:35:42,447 --> 00:35:43,505 - (GASPS) - THADEOUS: Ew! 752 00:35:43,781 --> 00:35:45,043 Julie has no dick! 753 00:35:45,150 --> 00:35:46,174 Ew. 754 00:35:46,317 --> 00:35:46,518 Boremont! 755 00:35:46,518 --> 00:35:47,382 Boremont! 756 00:35:47,585 --> 00:35:48,643 JULIE: Help! 757 00:35:49,854 --> 00:35:50,946 (EXCLAIMING) 758 00:35:51,189 --> 00:35:52,178 Knights! 759 00:35:52,290 --> 00:35:53,757 A turncoat has been discovered! 760 00:35:53,958 --> 00:35:55,425 Prince Fabious, what is wrong? 761 00:35:55,627 --> 00:35:56,958 Boremont, seize Julie, 762 00:35:57,061 --> 00:35:58,494 I'm afraid he's betrayed us! 763 00:35:58,630 --> 00:36:00,723 That thing is a dickless traitor! 764 00:36:00,999 --> 00:36:02,466 - BOREMONT: A traitor, you say. - BOTH: Yes. 765 00:36:02,667 --> 00:36:05,158 I saw him seeking counsel with Leezar. 766 00:36:05,370 --> 00:36:07,998 Counsel? With Leezar? 767 00:36:08,840 --> 00:36:11,035 Well, if what they say is true, 768 00:36:11,142 --> 00:36:13,906 then, Julie, I have but one question for you. 769 00:36:14,512 --> 00:36:16,446 What were our master's orders? 770 00:36:16,548 --> 00:36:17,606 What? 771 00:36:17,715 --> 00:36:18,909 JULIE: His orders were simple. 772 00:36:19,484 --> 00:36:22,009 Capture Fabious and kill the rest. 773 00:36:22,220 --> 00:36:25,053 Boremont, how could you? 774 00:36:25,156 --> 00:36:26,646 What about the code of the Knights Elite? 775 00:36:26,758 --> 00:36:27,782 BOREMONT: Code? 776 00:36:28,126 --> 00:36:30,026 Upon your choice of best man for your wedding, 777 00:36:30,128 --> 00:36:32,392 your "code" became clear to me. 778 00:36:32,497 --> 00:36:34,294 You hurt my feelings. 779 00:36:34,732 --> 00:36:36,529 Now I shall hurt yours. 780 00:36:38,036 --> 00:36:39,469 Kill them all! 781 00:36:39,671 --> 00:36:41,263 Look out! 782 00:36:43,708 --> 00:36:44,732 (WOOD CREAKING) 783 00:36:45,977 --> 00:36:47,137 (EXCLAIMS) 784 00:36:48,246 --> 00:36:49,235 To the carriage! 785 00:36:49,347 --> 00:36:51,042 THADEOUS: Your friends tried to slay us. 786 00:36:51,149 --> 00:36:53,709 Those bastards! Get in! 787 00:36:55,486 --> 00:36:56,919 (GRUNTING) 788 00:36:59,057 --> 00:37:00,149 After them! 789 00:37:00,258 --> 00:37:01,247 Okay, go! 790 00:37:01,359 --> 00:37:02,553 (URGING HORSES) 791 00:37:11,569 --> 00:37:13,059 We've got company! 792 00:37:13,271 --> 00:37:14,431 Ready yourselves! 793 00:37:14,572 --> 00:37:15,800 These men are fierce! 794 00:37:21,946 --> 00:37:23,038 Oh, gods! 795 00:37:25,316 --> 00:37:26,442 (GRUNTING) 796 00:37:27,218 --> 00:37:28,515 (SCREAMS) 797 00:37:38,096 --> 00:37:39,063 (YELLS) 798 00:37:47,238 --> 00:37:48,705 FABIOUS: Under the cart you go! 799 00:37:52,910 --> 00:37:54,775 Fucking sword! Stab him! 800 00:37:54,979 --> 00:37:56,207 Stab him! 801 00:37:57,115 --> 00:37:58,548 (SCREAMING) 802 00:38:00,685 --> 00:38:02,277 (EXCLAIMS IN DISGUST) 803 00:38:02,387 --> 00:38:04,116 You cut his hair off! 804 00:38:13,831 --> 00:38:14,957 Oh! 805 00:38:15,066 --> 00:38:16,294 Fabious, he's coming! 806 00:38:16,501 --> 00:38:18,128 I know, get up here! 807 00:38:23,274 --> 00:38:24,707 (THADEOUS EXCLAIMS) 808 00:38:24,809 --> 00:38:25,776 Come on! 809 00:38:29,447 --> 00:38:30,471 THADEOUS: Now what? 810 00:38:30,782 --> 00:38:33,444 I have a plan. We jump on the horses and ride away. 811 00:38:34,152 --> 00:38:35,710 But the horses, they're moving. 812 00:38:35,920 --> 00:38:37,785 I know. I know. 813 00:38:38,990 --> 00:38:40,218 (GRUNTING) 814 00:38:40,325 --> 00:38:41,792 Oh, shit! 815 00:38:42,226 --> 00:38:43,352 (EXCLAIMS) 816 00:38:46,130 --> 00:38:47,119 Come on! 817 00:38:47,231 --> 00:38:48,459 What? Want me, as well? 818 00:38:48,666 --> 00:38:49,690 - Now! - (SCREAMS) 819 00:38:53,971 --> 00:38:55,461 Face me, you traitor. 820 00:38:58,843 --> 00:38:59,935 (GROANS) 821 00:39:06,451 --> 00:39:07,782 (GROANING) 822 00:39:20,865 --> 00:39:21,889 Look! 823 00:39:21,999 --> 00:39:23,091 COURTNEY: Oh, shit! 824 00:39:23,201 --> 00:39:24,259 (BOTH SHOUTING) 825 00:39:37,749 --> 00:39:39,341 (MANIOUS AND THUNDARIAN SCREAMING) 826 00:39:40,752 --> 00:39:41,946 We did it! 827 00:39:42,653 --> 00:39:43,950 (GRUNTS) 828 00:39:45,823 --> 00:39:47,051 FABIOUS: Ka-boom! 829 00:39:47,258 --> 00:39:48,657 COURTNEY: (LAUGHING) Yes! 830 00:39:51,763 --> 00:39:53,560 LEEZAR: If I could have everyone's attention. 831 00:39:54,165 --> 00:39:56,656 I'd like to say a few words, if I may. 832 00:39:56,868 --> 00:39:59,166 I have prepared this feast 833 00:39:59,370 --> 00:40:02,237 in honor and appreciation of Belladonna. 834 00:40:02,440 --> 00:40:04,670 Seems like it was only yesterday 835 00:40:04,776 --> 00:40:08,212 that we used sorcery to burn your village to the ground, 836 00:40:08,780 --> 00:40:10,042 come in and snatch you. 837 00:40:10,515 --> 00:40:11,641 But I remember looking at you 838 00:40:11,749 --> 00:40:13,148 all those years ago and thinking, 839 00:40:13,551 --> 00:40:16,019 "Wow, that's a baby." 840 00:40:16,220 --> 00:40:19,155 "And that's the baby that someday I will have to have sex with." 841 00:40:19,357 --> 00:40:20,847 Now, look at me. 842 00:40:21,058 --> 00:40:23,117 A 19-year-old boy, almost a man, 843 00:40:23,227 --> 00:40:24,251 (LAUGHS) 844 00:40:24,362 --> 00:40:25,852 still a virgin. 845 00:40:26,063 --> 00:40:27,155 To the fuckening! 846 00:40:27,365 --> 00:40:29,730 - Yes, to the fuckening! - (SPITS IN DISGUST) 847 00:40:30,133 --> 00:40:33,194 Leezar, what is this rubbish you have set before us? 848 00:40:33,404 --> 00:40:36,032 It's such a funny choice for a feast. 849 00:40:36,240 --> 00:40:37,798 I'm just a little overwhelmed right now. 850 00:40:37,909 --> 00:40:40,207 Dealing with her and you and the fucking prophecy. 851 00:40:40,411 --> 00:40:41,605 I mean, we could all just relax... 852 00:40:41,712 --> 00:40:42,872 JULIE: Master. 853 00:40:43,014 --> 00:40:44,675 What do you want, Julie? 854 00:40:44,949 --> 00:40:47,213 Regrettably, the Princes of Mourne have escaped. 855 00:40:47,418 --> 00:40:49,750 You should've killed them at the wedding when you had the chance. 856 00:40:50,021 --> 00:40:51,488 Fabious is of no purpose to us. 857 00:40:51,589 --> 00:40:52,681 Silence! 858 00:40:52,824 --> 00:40:55,759 His purpose is to destroy you and your evil ways. 859 00:40:55,893 --> 00:40:58,157 Would you shut up, or I will love you less. 860 00:40:58,262 --> 00:41:00,127 Are those fish fingers you're eating? 861 00:41:00,331 --> 00:41:02,993 No more questions! Now find them! 862 00:41:05,150 --> 00:41:06,117 (URGING HORSES) 863 00:41:06,217 --> 00:41:09,186 Shit! Fabious, the horses! They're escaping. 864 00:41:09,287 --> 00:41:12,688 Yes, it's a distraction to lead them off our trail. 865 00:41:12,891 --> 00:41:14,950 And what are we to do now? Walk all the way home? 866 00:41:15,160 --> 00:41:17,628 Home? We're not going home. 867 00:41:17,762 --> 00:41:18,751 Just because the knights betrayed us 868 00:41:18,863 --> 00:41:20,854 does not mean we give up on the quest. 869 00:41:21,066 --> 00:41:23,125 Together we can still accomplish what needs to be done. 870 00:41:23,335 --> 00:41:25,326 How? We're lost, I'm hungry. 871 00:41:25,437 --> 00:41:27,667 This stump, it's putting my asshole to sleep. 872 00:41:27,772 --> 00:41:30,434 Thadeous, your feet are bare. Put your boots on. 873 00:41:30,875 --> 00:41:32,968 They're filthy, I'm having them exfoliated. 874 00:41:33,078 --> 00:41:34,602 No time for exfoliation. 875 00:41:36,648 --> 00:41:38,138 The compass points north. 876 00:41:38,350 --> 00:41:39,942 We shall follow it still. 877 00:41:40,352 --> 00:41:42,513 I will not give up till Belladonna is safe in mine arms. 878 00:41:42,620 --> 00:41:43,587 - Oh, god. - (SIMON SQUAWKING) 879 00:41:47,341 --> 00:41:49,241 Simon! Where have you been? 880 00:41:49,444 --> 00:41:50,638 Shit. 881 00:41:50,745 --> 00:41:51,871 What? 882 00:41:52,046 --> 00:41:54,514 I left goddamn Steven back at camp. 883 00:41:54,749 --> 00:41:55,909 Who's Steven? 884 00:41:56,117 --> 00:41:58,017 He's my loyal animal companion. 885 00:41:58,219 --> 00:42:01,518 And he means just as much to me as Simon means to you. 886 00:42:01,722 --> 00:42:04,190 But I guess I'll never see him again. 887 00:42:04,392 --> 00:42:06,826 Very well. I understand that bond. 888 00:42:07,095 --> 00:42:11,122 Let us return to camp, face the traitors and rescue Steven. 889 00:42:11,299 --> 00:42:12,994 No, fuck it. It's over. 890 00:42:13,267 --> 00:42:16,065 But, perhaps, since my animal companion is no longer here, 891 00:42:16,170 --> 00:42:18,502 it's only fair that we get rid of yours as well. 892 00:42:18,606 --> 00:42:19,573 (CHIRPS SADLY) 893 00:42:20,508 --> 00:42:22,738 No, that would serve no purpose, Brother. 894 00:42:22,944 --> 00:42:24,878 That would be like me asking you to get rid of Courtney 895 00:42:24,979 --> 00:42:26,708 just because Julie is no longer with us. 896 00:42:26,948 --> 00:42:29,109 I will drown Courtney in the shallow fucking pond right now 897 00:42:29,217 --> 00:42:30,343 if that means fair is fair. 898 00:42:30,451 --> 00:42:31,918 I don't like that idea, sir. 899 00:42:32,019 --> 00:42:33,953 No, Simon can help us. 900 00:42:34,055 --> 00:42:35,022 Simon, 901 00:42:35,389 --> 00:42:37,721 you must take this message to father. 902 00:42:37,825 --> 00:42:40,350 Tell him that the Knights Elite betrayed us 903 00:42:40,461 --> 00:42:43,897 and he must send an army across the valley to Muldiss Darton 904 00:42:44,098 --> 00:42:46,396 and help us retrieve the Blade of Unicorn. 905 00:42:46,534 --> 00:42:47,626 Hurry, Simon! 906 00:42:47,735 --> 00:42:50,795 Fly to Mourne and deliver these desperate words. 907 00:42:51,072 --> 00:42:52,369 Fly! 908 00:42:52,573 --> 00:42:54,006 Fly! 909 00:42:58,179 --> 00:42:59,168 (SNIFFING) 910 00:42:59,280 --> 00:43:02,215 Come on, Manious, you've been sniffing dirt all morning. 911 00:43:02,316 --> 00:43:05,080 We would not be in this position, Julie, 912 00:43:05,186 --> 00:43:07,984 if you wouldn't have gotten caught communicating with Leezar. 913 00:43:08,156 --> 00:43:10,249 And if you ladies were proper assassins, 914 00:43:10,358 --> 00:43:13,725 you'd have cut them down back there as the Dark Lord commanded. 915 00:43:15,229 --> 00:43:16,924 Manious, what do you see? 916 00:43:17,198 --> 00:43:19,826 They stepped towards the sun here. 917 00:43:20,034 --> 00:43:23,265 This blade of grass, one of them pissed on it. 918 00:43:23,604 --> 00:43:27,631 And then they moved, very quickly, mind, towards... 919 00:43:28,409 --> 00:43:29,398 There! 920 00:43:31,345 --> 00:43:32,778 JULIE: That's Marteetee's land. 921 00:43:32,980 --> 00:43:33,947 What? 922 00:43:34,148 --> 00:43:36,844 JULIE: Our mission may be completed sooner than I expected. 923 00:43:37,285 --> 00:43:38,411 (LAUGHS) 924 00:43:40,121 --> 00:43:42,783 If I may be so bold, Your Highness, 925 00:43:42,890 --> 00:43:45,654 what is the meaning of that ribbon that you hold? 926 00:43:45,960 --> 00:43:47,484 This? 927 00:43:47,695 --> 00:43:49,526 It's a gift from Belladonna. 928 00:43:49,630 --> 00:43:50,619 A symbol of her virgin purity. 929 00:43:52,216 --> 00:43:54,514 I hold it and savor it. 930 00:43:54,685 --> 00:43:57,745 You do that instead of have sex with her? 931 00:43:57,955 --> 00:44:00,116 Belladonna is unlike any maiden in the kingdom. 932 00:44:00,257 --> 00:44:02,054 She behaves without judgment, 933 00:44:02,159 --> 00:44:03,683 defies expectation. 934 00:44:04,061 --> 00:44:05,653 When I first heard her voice 935 00:44:05,763 --> 00:44:07,628 a tear came to my eye, 936 00:44:07,731 --> 00:44:09,392 and that tear turned to ice, 937 00:44:09,500 --> 00:44:11,468 and I kept that frozen tear 938 00:44:11,568 --> 00:44:14,036 far from my heart that burns with passion. 939 00:44:15,005 --> 00:44:16,495 If she had a wound, 940 00:44:16,707 --> 00:44:18,675 I would kiss it. 941 00:44:18,776 --> 00:44:21,040 If she had a splinter, 942 00:44:21,145 --> 00:44:24,637 I would pull it from her flesh with mine lips. 943 00:44:24,882 --> 00:44:29,979 Just say we are too late and Leezar has had his way with her, 944 00:44:30,287 --> 00:44:33,848 would you still be able to be with her? 945 00:44:35,025 --> 00:44:36,515 I don't want to think about that. 946 00:44:36,727 --> 00:44:38,627 But just say that we were moments late, 947 00:44:38,729 --> 00:44:42,165 and he was able to get her cookies. 948 00:44:42,466 --> 00:44:43,524 Shut up. 949 00:44:43,634 --> 00:44:47,570 Yes, I know, but what if he butt-fucked her? Would you still like her? 950 00:44:47,671 --> 00:44:49,161 Do I have to write you a poem? 951 00:44:49,440 --> 00:44:51,908 There's never been a love so true as ours. 952 00:44:53,077 --> 00:44:54,510 That's pure love. 953 00:44:54,745 --> 00:44:56,042 Yes, it is. 954 00:44:56,180 --> 00:44:57,613 THADEOUS: No, that's pure love. 955 00:44:57,915 --> 00:44:59,906 There's a naked woman standing behind you. 956 00:45:01,618 --> 00:45:03,711 Who is that? 957 00:45:04,054 --> 00:45:05,919 Is she looking at us? 958 00:45:06,090 --> 00:45:07,751 Who is it? Is it him? Are you looking to him? 959 00:45:07,991 --> 00:45:09,925 Is it Courtney? Is it to me? 960 00:45:10,160 --> 00:45:11,388 It's Courtney. I think it's to me. 961 00:45:12,162 --> 00:45:15,427 COURTNEY: I believe she is taking her trousers off. 962 00:45:15,732 --> 00:45:18,758 Right, I will return momentarily. 963 00:45:18,869 --> 00:45:19,995 COURTNEY: No. 964 00:45:20,104 --> 00:45:21,264 Thadeous, it might be a trap. 965 00:45:21,939 --> 00:45:26,035 The only thing those tits will trap is my warm spray. 966 00:45:26,210 --> 00:45:28,269 Have fun rubbing your ribbon. 967 00:45:28,846 --> 00:45:29,938 Disgusting. 968 00:45:30,047 --> 00:45:31,014 - Come back here, you. - (GIGGLING) 969 00:45:34,234 --> 00:45:37,032 I'm beginning to think he doesn't care about this quest. 970 00:45:37,237 --> 00:45:39,398 What could possibly make you think that, sir? 971 00:45:39,506 --> 00:45:40,473 THADEOUS: Oh, shit! 972 00:45:40,740 --> 00:45:42,970 Oh, shit! It's a trap. A booby trap. 973 00:45:43,176 --> 00:45:44,143 Oh, god! 974 00:45:44,344 --> 00:45:45,777 It was a trap. (EXCLAIMS) 975 00:45:45,979 --> 00:45:47,446 White people, I knew it! 976 00:45:47,647 --> 00:45:48,636 COURTNEY: White people? 977 00:45:48,815 --> 00:45:50,476 - Are they nice or are they mean? - FABIOUS: They're mean! 978 00:45:50,583 --> 00:45:51,845 They're the meanest! 979 00:45:52,218 --> 00:45:53,242 THADEOUS: What do we do? 980 00:45:53,353 --> 00:45:55,184 I don't know. It is against code to strike a woman. 981 00:45:55,288 --> 00:45:56,380 I'm sick of your silly codes. 982 00:45:56,489 --> 00:45:57,717 Punch these ladies in the face! 983 00:45:58,458 --> 00:45:59,652 (THADEOUS GROANING) 984 00:46:04,330 --> 00:46:06,355 (ALL CHATTERING) 985 00:46:07,700 --> 00:46:09,497 COURTNEY: Sire, where are they taking us? 986 00:46:09,702 --> 00:46:12,330 I don't know. Stay close! 987 00:46:12,438 --> 00:46:13,837 (DRUMS BEATING) 988 00:46:13,940 --> 00:46:15,669 (CROWD SHOUTING) 989 00:46:44,704 --> 00:46:45,762 Marteetee. 990 00:46:45,872 --> 00:46:46,861 Mart-who? 991 00:46:46,973 --> 00:46:49,203 MARTEETEE: Silence! 992 00:46:49,742 --> 00:46:52,540 Good day, my little bees 993 00:46:52,745 --> 00:46:56,647 and welcome to my most special of events. 994 00:46:57,150 --> 00:46:59,675 We have a wonderful treat 995 00:46:59,886 --> 00:47:03,982 as you get to witness a sea of babbling men 996 00:47:04,090 --> 00:47:05,990 behold their fates. 997 00:47:06,092 --> 00:47:07,582 (MARTEETEE LAUGHING) 998 00:47:07,927 --> 00:47:11,226 Enter, Dastardly! 999 00:47:11,331 --> 00:47:12,889 (ALL CHEERING) 1000 00:47:18,972 --> 00:47:20,439 (CHEERING LOUDLY) 1001 00:47:24,477 --> 00:47:25,808 (LAUGHING) 1002 00:47:26,245 --> 00:47:27,735 Bloodthirsty creatures. 1003 00:47:35,588 --> 00:47:36,646 Oh! 1004 00:47:38,925 --> 00:47:39,892 (CHEERING) 1005 00:47:39,993 --> 00:47:41,221 (LAUGHING) 1006 00:47:41,961 --> 00:47:45,419 Brother, if I die, you must promise me to continue our quest. 1007 00:47:46,165 --> 00:47:47,132 Ooh! 1008 00:47:56,042 --> 00:47:57,532 - Him. - No! 1009 00:47:57,744 --> 00:47:58,733 Kill him first! 1010 00:47:58,845 --> 00:47:59,812 Stay away! 1011 00:48:02,882 --> 00:48:04,042 Take the knife. 1012 00:48:04,150 --> 00:48:05,242 Why? 1013 00:48:05,485 --> 00:48:06,816 Watch this. 1014 00:48:18,631 --> 00:48:19,655 (GRUNTING) 1015 00:48:19,766 --> 00:48:20,733 (SCREAMING) 1016 00:48:23,102 --> 00:48:24,069 - Oh! - Yes! 1017 00:48:24,270 --> 00:48:25,862 No! 1018 00:48:25,972 --> 00:48:26,996 (CHEERING STOPS) 1019 00:48:27,106 --> 00:48:28,767 Face! Yes! 1020 00:48:30,710 --> 00:48:31,836 Huh? 1021 00:48:32,478 --> 00:48:35,447 (ALL LAUGHING TRIUMPHANTLY) 1022 00:48:36,783 --> 00:48:39,411 We've bested your finest warrior. 1023 00:48:39,619 --> 00:48:41,644 Now grant us our freedom! 1024 00:48:41,854 --> 00:48:42,878 Yeah! 1025 00:48:42,989 --> 00:48:45,958 Bring Marteetee his cauldron! 1026 00:48:46,225 --> 00:48:47,487 (ALL CHEERING LOUDLY) 1027 00:48:48,661 --> 00:48:50,424 What is the cauldron?