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This is the city. Los Angeles, California.

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465 square miles of constantly
interfacing humanity...

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representing every race, colour...

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creed and persuasion...

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that God,
no matter how he is worshipped...

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chose, in His infinite wisdom,
to deposit here...

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in the cultural nexus
of the Pacific Rim.

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Almost 4 million people
work and play here.

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And like any other place
anywhere...

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there are those who have it
and those who want it.

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Those who have it, enjoy it...

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no matter how they got it.

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Those who want it, can get it
by attempting to better themselves...

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in a sympathetic community populated
by decent citizens cheering them on.

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Or they can try to take it
the easy way.

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Because even in the City of Angels,
from time to time, some halos slip.

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That's where I come in, doing my job to
the best of my ability on a daily basis.

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I work here.
I carry a badge.

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♪♪

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Dragnet!

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♪ Police, police
police officer, ma'am ♪

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♪ Their job
Their job ♪

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♪ To enforce the laws
To enforce the laws ♪

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To enforce the laws ♪

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♪ Enforce
Enforce the laws ♪

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♪ To enforce the laws
Their job: To enforce the laws ♪

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♪ J-J-J-J-Just the facts, ma'am ♪

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♪ Just the facts, ma'am
Just the facts, ma'am ♪

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♪ D-D-D-D-Dragnet
Dragnet ♪

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♪ To enforce the laws
To enforce the laws ♪

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♪ To enforce the laws ♪

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♪ Dragnet, Dragnet, Dragnet ♪

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To enforce the laws
To enforce the laws ♪

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♪ To enforce the laws
To enforce the laws ♪

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Police officers, ma'am.

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Just the facts, ma'am.
Just the facts, ma'am.

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♪ J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J-J ♪

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- ♪ To enforce the laws ♪
- ♪ M-My name's Friday ♪

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- ♪ M-My name's Friday ♪
- ♪ Enforce the laws ♪

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- ♪ M-My name's Friday ♪
- ♪ Their job ♪

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♪ To enforce the laws ♪

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♪ And preserve the safety
of decent citizens ♪

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♪ Dragnet, Dragnet, Dragnet ♪♪

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Ladies and gentlemen,
the story you are about to see is true.

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The names have been changed
to protect the innocent.

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For example, George Baker
is now called Sylvia Wiss.

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Hey, who called
the fire department?

48
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What the hell is going on here?

49
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Chief, where's the fire?

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See the fire?

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I see the fire.
I see the fire.

52
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Good! When you wake up...

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tell Jerry Caesar
he's out of business.

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It was Wednesday, January 7.

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A cool day in Los Angeles,
with westerly winds...

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and light, scattered clouds
at 3,000 feet.

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I was working day watch
out of Robbery-Homicide...

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at the same desk
my late Uncle Joe occupied...

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when he served with the department
20 years ago.

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Many aspects of the officer's routine
have changed since Uncle Joe's time.

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Now there are new methods,
new philosophies, new equipment.

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The standard service revolver
and simple lead sap...

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have given way to Taser guns
and anodized metal batons.

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But there's one thing
that never changes.

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The face of crime. It just gets bigger
and badder and uglier every day.

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My partner's name is Frank Smith.
The boss is Captain Gannon.

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My name's Friday.

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- Joe.
- Captain.

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Frank's late.
Must've been held up in traffic.

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- Frank won't be coming in today.
- 24-hour virus?

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- Or tomorrow.
- Forty-eight?

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Frank quit.
Bought a goat farm.

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Moved to Ukiah. Left you this note.

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He was too broken up to talk about it.

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Said he knew you'd understand.

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Every man has a dream to chase.
Frank's was that goat farm.

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- I understand. But tell me something.
- Yeah?

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Those 3.6 million citizens who expected
him to be on the job this morning...

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will they understand?

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8:47 a.m.

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Captain Gannon had assigned me
to investigate the Pagan robberies...

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a pattern of serial crimes
which had occurred throughout the city.

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They'd seemed merely irritating,
but were gaining notoriety...

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through their growing frequency
and naked brazenness.

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I was to contact my new partner
at the central receiving lot.

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A less experienced officer might have
been concerned he was getting potluck.

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But I knew that any detective
the department had to offer me...

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was automatically worthy
of my respect.

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- Sergeant Friday?
- Who wants to know?

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I'm Pep Streebek,
your new partner.

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- Not looking like that, you aren't.
- Really? What's that mean?

92
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It means I don't care what
undercover rock you crawled out from...

93
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there's a dress code for detectives
in Robbery-Homicide.

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Section 3-605...

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.10,.20,.22,.24,.26,
.50,.70,.80.

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It specifies clean shirt, short hair,
tie, pressed trousers...

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sports jacket or suit and leather shoes,
preferable with a high shine.

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9:05 a.m.

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Streebek's unauthorized outfit
and facial growth were history.

100
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For the first time in 12 years, I rolled
into traffic with a new partner.

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Male, Caucasian...

102
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six feet, 165 pounds...

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no distinguishing scars.

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He had an extensive list
of merit citations which was tainted...

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by his total disregard
for departmental procedure.

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He pictured himself
as some hipster, free-bird cop.

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But his wings were about
to be clipped...

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because now he was going to play
the detective game by my rules.

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Friday, we're allowed to go 55.

110
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On some occasions, even faster.

111
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I'm well aware of the
federally-mandated speed limit.

112
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But did it ever occur to you
that by going 8 miles an hour slower...

113
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we might save gas and ease the burden
on the taxpayers who pay our salaries?

114
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A little extra gas
isn't gonna put the city in hock.

115
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Besides, this looks bad.

116
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Live a little!
It's the vertical pedal on the right.

117
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9:47 a.m.
We arrived at the Griffith Park Zoo...

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Los Angeles's habitat for wild animals
sustained in dignified captivity.

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An adult male lion and a security guard
had been tranquillized with a dart gun...

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and subsequent robberies
had occurred.

121
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These animals have it pretty good.

122
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Simulated surroundings,
three squares a day.

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If these creatures could talk, they'd
give the citizens a vote of thanks.

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Friday, these animals...

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were trapped, stunned and roped,
crated and shipped, dropped into cages.

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You think they were in the wild
forming lines, jockeying for position...

127
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saying, "Take me!
I want to live on damn cement"?

128
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When I look in their eyes,
I get a different message.

129
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We'll leave it at that.

130
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Are you the police?

131
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Friday, Streebek. Robbery.
You have some Pagan cards?

132
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Yeah. Three of them.
Left in separate cages.

133
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Let me show you where I found them.

134
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This is Ben, our boa constrictor.

135
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The missing giant anaconda was still
here last night at 8:30.

136
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I know because that's when it gets
its final feeding.

137
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It's not always its final feeding.

138
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Sometimes it hides a little snack
for later.

139
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Just the facts,
if you don't mind, ma'am.

140
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What exactly does a Central Bolivian
Anaconda choose to feed on?

141
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It eats whole, live groundhogs.

142
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- You skip breakfast, Friday?
- Whoever stole it's gotta feed it.

143
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We also seem to be missing
one of these.

144
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What is the approximate dry weight
of the Madagascar Fruit Tree Bat?

145
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You mean you don't know?

146
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This is the one
I understand the least.

147
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Somebody must've wanted that lion's mane
bad to pull a stunt like that.

148
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Although, as Mohawks go,
it's not that bad. It'll grow back.

149
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How do you tell that to kids who haven't
seen a lion and won't want to again?

150
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Kids, it'll grow back.

151
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Yea!

152
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10:35 a.m.

153
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Arsonists posing as firemen
had left a Pagan card...

154
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in the charred ruins
of a downtown warehouse.

155
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We were advised to contact
the owner of the stolen merchandise...

156
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soft-core porno lord, Jerry Caesar...

157
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at his notorious pleasure compound
in the coveted Bel-Air section.

158
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Oh, thank God! Vibrator repair?

159
00:11:56,725 --> 00:11:59,512
No, ma'am.
Los Angeles Police Department.

160
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Sorry.

161
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It's enough to churn your guts,
isn't it?

162
00:12:12,658 --> 00:12:15,612
This girl pruning this bush
with her...

163
00:12:15,702 --> 00:12:19,118
That a slut peddler like Jerry Caesar
could build a modern day Gomorrah...

164
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in the same city where they recorded
"We Are the World."

165
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- Hi.
- Hi.

166
00:12:33,470 --> 00:12:35,047
Don't get too friendly.

167
00:12:39,434 --> 00:12:41,011
Hi. Can I help you?

168
00:12:41,102 --> 00:12:44,637
Police officers, ma'am.
L.A.P.D. Robbery. I'm Friday. This is...

169
00:12:44,731 --> 00:12:47,056
- April!
- That's right.

170
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She was a Baitmate.

171
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Bait magazine.
She was featured.

172
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I get the hang of it.
In the April issue.

173
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No, Mr Silly. February!
My name is April.

174
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Don't tell me. Your favourite movies are
The Sound of Music and Yes, Giorgio.

175
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You love to go bobbing for apples.

176
00:13:04,583 --> 00:13:06,955
Your major turn-offs are...

177
00:13:07,044 --> 00:13:11,089
anchovies, people
who don't use coasters and...

178
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And men who smoke in public places.

179
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Let's go meet Jerry.

180
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There's Jerry over there.

181
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I'm gonna have a place
like this someday.

182
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Dream on, Streebek, dream on.

183
00:13:51,713 --> 00:13:53,670
It's about time.

184
00:13:53,756 --> 00:13:55,963
I called you cops three hours ago.

185
00:13:56,050 --> 00:13:59,051
Yes, sir. My name's Friday.
This is Detective Streebek.

186
00:13:59,804 --> 00:14:01,298
What's missing?

187
00:14:01,389 --> 00:14:03,880
How about the entire run...

188
00:14:03,975 --> 00:14:07,806
every single copy of our
25th Anniversary double issue of Bait.

189
00:14:08,896 --> 00:14:11,469
- Bait.
- That's his skin magazine.

190
00:14:11,565 --> 00:14:15,563
You say.
The intelligent subscriber regards it...

191
00:14:15,653 --> 00:14:18,570
as a politically-oriented,
socially-impacted monthly.

192
00:14:18,656 --> 00:14:22,404
I'm not gonna allow a gang
of cement heads to intimidate me...

193
00:14:22,493 --> 00:14:24,781
just because I refused to publish
their stupid manifesto.

194
00:14:24,870 --> 00:14:29,366
- Tell us about that.
- Here. Read it for yourself.

195
00:14:31,251 --> 00:14:33,457
"Manifest of the International
Brotherhood of Pagan.

196
00:14:33,545 --> 00:14:37,495
We believe bad sex and good drugs are
the cornerstone of a great democracy.

197
00:14:37,591 --> 00:14:41,042
- The peak of pornography..."
- We get the general idea.

198
00:14:41,136 --> 00:14:45,133
My publishing company is not a
private platform for a bunch of yahoos.

199
00:14:45,223 --> 00:14:47,714
I don't care how many copies
they buy.

200
00:14:47,809 --> 00:14:51,509
I don't have to publish their junk just
because they got 1st amendment rights.

201
00:14:51,604 --> 00:14:53,811
I've got 1st amendment rights, too.
Look 'em up.

202
00:14:53,898 --> 00:14:56,472
I don't have.
I can quote 'em to you.

203
00:14:56,568 --> 00:15:00,102
Anyhow, how much do you figure
a monthly run of your...

204
00:15:00,196 --> 00:15:02,153
"magazine" is worth?

205
00:15:03,116 --> 00:15:07,943
It's more money than you'll ever see
in your life. And I do that every month.

206
00:15:08,037 --> 00:15:09,496
My money's clean.

207
00:15:09,580 --> 00:15:13,874
I'll tell you what you do before you go
home and start polishing your pennies.

208
00:15:13,959 --> 00:15:17,210
Go out and get my magazines
back on the stand where they belong.

209
00:15:17,296 --> 00:15:22,124
Listen, hotshot, I don't care for you or
the putrid sludge you're trowelling out.

210
00:15:22,218 --> 00:15:26,796
But until the laws are changed,
my job's to get back your boxes of smut.

211
00:15:26,889 --> 00:15:29,689
Since I'll be doing it holding my nose,
I'll be doing it with one hand.

212
00:15:31,435 --> 00:15:34,768
Excuse me. Jerry, it's time
for your collagen treatment.

213
00:15:34,855 --> 00:15:37,891
And don't forget, you're having
your pores sucked at 3:00.

214
00:15:38,984 --> 00:15:40,526
Thank you, Sylvia.

215
00:15:40,610 --> 00:15:43,066
Boys, as you can see,
I've got my work to do.

216
00:15:43,155 --> 00:15:46,358
Why don't you get the hell out of here
and do yours?

217
00:15:52,664 --> 00:15:55,071
You have very strong hands.

218
00:15:55,166 --> 00:15:57,455
Hey, Sylvia Wiss!

219
00:15:58,878 --> 00:16:00,254
Yes, that's me.

220
00:16:00,338 --> 00:16:03,209
They oughta transfer you to
Missing Persons. You know everybody.

221
00:16:03,299 --> 00:16:08,294
Don't you read the papers? Saturday is
Bait magazine's 25th anniversary party.

222
00:16:08,388 --> 00:16:11,591
Caesar is reuniting all
of his former Baitmates.

223
00:16:11,682 --> 00:16:16,807
Miss Sylvia Wiss, right here,
was the very first Baitmate ever.

224
00:16:16,896 --> 00:16:18,307
Fascinating.

225
00:16:18,397 --> 00:16:23,225
Sergeant, if I asked your honest opinion
about something, would I get it?

226
00:16:23,319 --> 00:16:25,276
You can bet the house on it.

227
00:16:26,447 --> 00:16:29,234
Would you say these look like
the breasts of a 43-year-old woman?

228
00:16:32,745 --> 00:16:35,948
No. No, they don't, Miss Wiss.

229
00:16:36,040 --> 00:16:39,455
They're quite impressive,
bordering on spectacular.

230
00:16:39,543 --> 00:16:41,452
We have to be running along now.

231
00:16:41,545 --> 00:16:43,952
What's your hurry?

232
00:16:44,047 --> 00:16:46,669
Wouldn't you like to have
an early lunch?

233
00:16:47,884 --> 00:16:50,375
Listen, Joe,
it's the darndest thing.

234
00:16:50,470 --> 00:16:53,970
I seem to have
left my notebook in the car.

235
00:16:54,057 --> 00:16:57,924
It's gonna take me 15, 20 min...
A half an hour to find it.

236
00:16:58,019 --> 00:17:02,812
Why don't you pump Sylvia privately
for information?

237
00:17:02,899 --> 00:17:04,939
And I'll, you know...

238
00:17:05,026 --> 00:17:08,810
- Nice meeting you, Miss Wiss.
- I had a good time, too.

239
00:17:08,905 --> 00:17:12,488
Come on. Let's go to the car
and find that notebook.

240
00:17:13,910 --> 00:17:15,819
Are you crazy?

241
00:17:15,912 --> 00:17:17,821
Sylvia Wiss wanted you.

242
00:17:19,123 --> 00:17:21,032
Let me tell you something.

243
00:17:21,125 --> 00:17:24,494
There are two things which differentiate
the human species from animals.

244
00:17:24,587 --> 00:17:28,335
One, we use cutlery.
Two, we can control our sexual urges.

245
00:17:28,424 --> 00:17:32,920
You might be an exception, but don't
drag me into your private hell.

246
00:17:34,847 --> 00:17:37,764
You've got a lot
of repressed feelings, don't you?

247
00:17:37,850 --> 00:17:40,720
Must be what keeps your hair up.

248
00:17:51,029 --> 00:17:55,276
- What is bothering you besides me?
- I'm thinking about those Pagans.

249
00:17:55,367 --> 00:17:59,447
If all they were after was revenge
against Caesar, it's slime versus slime.

250
00:17:59,538 --> 00:18:04,246
But when they attack great institutions
like our city zoo, my hackles turn red.

251
00:18:04,334 --> 00:18:07,703
You'll lose those red hackles
if you eat those chili dogs.

252
00:18:07,796 --> 00:18:09,373
I can handle it.

253
00:18:09,464 --> 00:18:13,248
They're the worst thing for you.
Filled with nitrates, toxins, poisons.

254
00:18:13,343 --> 00:18:15,252
And you're doubling up on them.

255
00:18:15,345 --> 00:18:19,259
Mister, outside of cigarettes
I only have one vice: Chili dogs.

256
00:18:19,349 --> 00:18:22,303
So pipe down and let me
enjoy my lunch in peace.

257
00:18:22,393 --> 00:18:26,011
Do you know the things that can fall
into an industrial sausage press...

258
00:18:26,105 --> 00:18:29,688
not excluding rodent hairs
and bug excrement?

259
00:18:29,776 --> 00:18:31,852
I hate you, Streebek.

260
00:18:41,203 --> 00:18:45,699
Except for you and canned cling peaches,
I'd be hard-pressed to find anyone...

261
00:18:45,791 --> 00:18:48,562
that doesn't know you should never leave
your car keys in the ignition.

262
00:18:48,586 --> 00:18:51,871
It's called a mistake. But I don't
suppose you ever make any of those.

263
00:18:51,964 --> 00:18:54,336
At ease, Streebek.
We got another one.

264
00:18:54,425 --> 00:18:56,962
Chemical train hijack
at the freight yards.

265
00:18:57,052 --> 00:18:59,625
Damn Pagans must be living on No-Doz.

266
00:18:59,721 --> 00:19:02,047
Yes, sir. We'll roll
as soon as we requisition a new...

267
00:19:02,140 --> 00:19:05,556
One more thing.
Police and fire departments...

268
00:19:05,644 --> 00:19:09,558
have been reporting vehicles stolen,
so keep an eye on your car.

269
00:19:15,362 --> 00:19:18,647
1:15 p.m. After requisitioning a replacement vehicle...

270
00:19:18,740 --> 00:19:21,361
we were issued
a new Ford Escort subcompact...

271
00:19:21,451 --> 00:19:26,445
and responded to the call at Southern
California's largest railhead...

272
00:19:26,539 --> 00:19:30,240
with more than 1,000 miles of track
lying parallel over 2 million ties...

273
00:19:30,335 --> 00:19:32,292
hewn from majestic redwood forests.

274
00:19:33,546 --> 00:19:37,129
3,000 gallons of two deadly chemicals
had been siphoned individually...

275
00:19:37,216 --> 00:19:40,253
from their respective
hijacked tanker cars.

276
00:19:40,344 --> 00:19:43,760
We questioned the battered
train engineer, Señor Tito Provencal...

277
00:19:43,848 --> 00:19:47,430
and attempted to determine the precise
identification of the missing gases...

278
00:19:47,518 --> 00:19:51,219
from the owner of the
chemicals company, a Mr Roy Grest.

279
00:19:51,313 --> 00:19:56,271
Actually trichlornitromethan
and the pseudo-halogenic cyanogen.

280
00:19:56,360 --> 00:19:58,400
Pseudo-halogenic cyanogen.

281
00:19:58,487 --> 00:20:02,152
They're shipped in separate containers.
Mixed properly in the exact ratio...

282
00:20:02,241 --> 00:20:05,526
they form a liquid fertilizer
that's clear as water.

283
00:20:05,619 --> 00:20:07,944
- But you wouldn't want to smell it.
- Why is that?

284
00:20:08,038 --> 00:20:11,324
It burns the eyes, lungs, and throat,
causes vomiting...

285
00:20:11,416 --> 00:20:13,705
and if continuously inhaled, death.

286
00:20:13,794 --> 00:20:16,249
Sort of like your aftershave.

287
00:20:26,681 --> 00:20:31,224
It's time to "Advance"
with the Reverend Jonathan Whirley...

288
00:20:31,311 --> 00:20:35,640
founder of MAMA,
the Moral Advance Movement of America.

289
00:20:35,732 --> 00:20:40,773
Today, Dr Whirley's special guest is
police commissioner for Los Angeles...

290
00:20:40,862 --> 00:20:43,400
Ms. Jane Kirkpatrick.

291
00:20:43,489 --> 00:20:46,027
Dr Whirley.

292
00:20:46,117 --> 00:20:50,494
Thank you, George,
and welcome once again to Advance.

293
00:20:51,622 --> 00:20:52,867
Commissioner...

294
00:20:52,957 --> 00:20:55,530
Please, will you call me Jane?

295
00:20:55,626 --> 00:20:59,493
Only if you call me Jonathan.

296
00:20:59,588 --> 00:21:02,506
Have you seen this guy?
What a mental fur ball.

297
00:21:02,591 --> 00:21:04,999
Happens to be one of my favourite shows.

298
00:21:05,094 --> 00:21:07,051
Why don't you listen and learn?

299
00:21:07,137 --> 00:21:12,132
What a deep honour it is for this city
that you have chosen Los Angeles...

300
00:21:12,226 --> 00:21:16,638
to be the new focal point for
the Moral Advance Movement of America.

301
00:21:16,730 --> 00:21:20,858
It's quite simple, Jane.

302
00:21:20,943 --> 00:21:24,109
If one wishes to effect a financial
upheaval in this country...

303
00:21:24,196 --> 00:21:26,687
one should set his or her sights
on Wall Street.

304
00:21:26,782 --> 00:21:30,482
If one wishes to revolutionize
the political system...

305
00:21:30,577 --> 00:21:33,578
he or she would naturally
go to Washington.

306
00:21:33,663 --> 00:21:37,246
But when dealing...

307
00:21:37,334 --> 00:21:40,584
with pornography, filth, crime...

308
00:21:40,670 --> 00:21:42,828
degradation...

309
00:21:42,922 --> 00:21:46,505
what better place is there to begin with
than Los Angeles...

310
00:21:47,510 --> 00:21:50,083
the current capital of depravity...

311
00:21:50,179 --> 00:21:53,844
in what sadly passes
for the modern world.

312
00:22:03,693 --> 00:22:05,270
2:15 p.m.

313
00:22:05,361 --> 00:22:09,987
We had been advised to follow up on
a theft at 8823467 Magnolia Boulevard.

314
00:22:10,074 --> 00:22:12,363
At this time of day,
it took us 20 minutes to get there.

315
00:22:12,451 --> 00:22:14,444
The complainant was the landlady,
Enid Borden.

316
00:22:14,537 --> 00:22:16,612
Some Pagan cards had been found.

317
00:22:21,877 --> 00:22:24,582
- What the hell do you want?
- Police officers, ma'am.

318
00:22:24,671 --> 00:22:26,747
About time you pencil dicks showed up.

319
00:22:26,840 --> 00:22:29,296
Why couldn't you have gotten here
before that big, bad...

320
00:22:29,384 --> 00:22:32,884
stupid-looking piece of sewage breath
stole my wedding dress?

321
00:22:32,971 --> 00:22:35,640
Sewage breath would be
your nickname for...

322
00:22:35,724 --> 00:22:37,266
Muzz. Emil Muzz.

323
00:22:37,350 --> 00:22:39,639
Not much of an improvement.

324
00:22:39,728 --> 00:22:45,102
That ass-wipe also stiffed me for two
months' rent when his cheque bounced.

325
00:22:45,191 --> 00:22:47,350
Goddam puss-faced pimp stick.

326
00:22:47,444 --> 00:22:49,732
All that was left in his room...

327
00:22:49,821 --> 00:22:52,110
was a big box of these things.

328
00:22:56,953 --> 00:23:00,203
Any idea where Emil Muzz could be now?
Friends? Family?

329
00:23:00,289 --> 00:23:03,789
He was a loner.
Took off in the middle of the night.

330
00:23:03,876 --> 00:23:05,999
Useless scum-lapping shitbag.

331
00:23:06,087 --> 00:23:08,293
Just the facts, ma'am.
He leave anything else behind?

332
00:23:08,381 --> 00:23:12,165
Yeah, a tape deck which I had to sell
to make up for the lost rent.

333
00:23:12,259 --> 00:23:16,257
So there's nothing you can do about it,
you slimy little jizz bucket.

334
00:23:16,347 --> 00:23:20,558
Yes, ma'am. Although you could be cited
for swearing at us.

335
00:23:20,643 --> 00:23:22,635
Says who, flathead?

336
00:23:22,728 --> 00:23:26,678
The California penal code 314.1
covering obscene conduct in public.

337
00:23:26,774 --> 00:23:28,184
Good enough for you?

338
00:23:28,275 --> 00:23:31,810
Them magazines and papers
were his down in the trash.

339
00:23:31,904 --> 00:23:33,896
No cheques or money. I looked.

340
00:23:33,989 --> 00:23:36,314
I should've thrown it in the river
the day he left...

341
00:23:36,408 --> 00:23:39,824
but unlike some people,
I have a heart, goddam it!

342
00:23:39,911 --> 00:23:42,237
That miserable bag of puke.

343
00:23:44,624 --> 00:23:48,124
I think we're finished here,
don't you, Detective Streebek?

344
00:23:50,088 --> 00:23:53,291
Didn't she say she threw
some of his stuff in the trash?

345
00:23:53,383 --> 00:23:56,337
There it goes. Let's roll.

346
00:24:11,109 --> 00:24:13,516
Am I glad I got transferred
into Robbery-Homicide!

347
00:24:13,611 --> 00:24:17,110
You can almost reach out
and touch the tension.

348
00:24:17,198 --> 00:24:19,950
What the hell was that?

349
00:24:20,034 --> 00:24:21,943
It has its days.

350
00:24:22,036 --> 00:24:24,194
Yeah. Like today.

351
00:24:24,288 --> 00:24:28,997
Sitting in a park, getting eaten
by ducks, sifting through garbage.

352
00:24:29,084 --> 00:24:32,916
Hello! Photographs of people.
Kinda faded.

353
00:24:33,005 --> 00:24:36,290
- Maybe one of them's Muzz.
- We couldn't be that lucky.

354
00:24:39,428 --> 00:24:42,180
Hey, phone number.
Think it means something?

355
00:24:42,264 --> 00:24:45,715
There's only one way to find out,
isn't there?

356
00:24:51,231 --> 00:24:53,603
It's for you. The president.

357
00:25:08,248 --> 00:25:09,493
It's ringing.

358
00:25:13,336 --> 00:25:16,290
- Good afternoon. Caesar residence.
- Bingo.

359
00:25:16,381 --> 00:25:19,050
- Hello. May I help you?
- Emil Muzz, please.

360
00:25:19,133 --> 00:25:22,585
- He's not here right now.
- This is Sergeant Friday, L.A.P.D.

361
00:25:22,678 --> 00:25:24,718
Could you tell us where he is?

362
00:25:24,805 --> 00:25:27,510
He's Mr Caesar's driver...

363
00:25:27,600 --> 00:25:31,847
and Mr Caesar's sailing on his yacht.

364
00:25:31,937 --> 00:25:34,096
That's it.
The limousine from the mansion.

365
00:25:34,190 --> 00:25:35,981
Yeah, and Emil Muzz.

366
00:25:36,066 --> 00:25:38,640
Let's check Enid Borden's description.

367
00:25:38,736 --> 00:25:40,527
Well...

368
00:25:40,613 --> 00:25:42,854
"Big, bad, stupid-looking."

369
00:25:42,948 --> 00:25:44,608
An exact match.

370
00:25:58,422 --> 00:26:00,498
Police officers. Emil Muzz?

371
00:26:04,886 --> 00:26:07,294
We need to ask you
a few questions.

372
00:26:07,389 --> 00:26:09,346
Blow it out your pants, cop.

373
00:26:09,432 --> 00:26:12,469
Good, Muzz.
Give yourself a hard time.

374
00:26:20,652 --> 00:26:22,312
I'll drive!

375
00:26:45,718 --> 00:26:47,627
- What are you doing?
- Calling for backup.

376
00:26:47,720 --> 00:26:50,637
- Why?
- There are regulations for pursuit.

377
00:26:50,723 --> 00:26:54,341
- We're gonna follow every one of them.
- Forget it. This is our collar.

378
00:26:54,435 --> 00:26:56,474
- Our collar, huh?
- I think so.

379
00:26:56,562 --> 00:26:58,803
Let me tell you something,
Mr Lone Wolf.

380
00:26:58,897 --> 00:27:02,646
The dedicated people of the Los Angeles
Police Department are one big family...

381
00:27:02,734 --> 00:27:05,439
from my brother, the traffic cop,
to my sister, the metre maid.

382
00:27:05,529 --> 00:27:09,147
And when one of us makes a collar,
we all make a collar.

383
00:27:09,241 --> 00:27:12,775
Are you on any medication that as
your partner I should be made aware of?

384
00:27:12,869 --> 00:27:16,072
2-King-14.
I am requesting a backup...

385
00:27:20,585 --> 00:27:23,420
Oh, no! Ahh!

386
00:27:38,978 --> 00:27:40,093
Look out!

387
00:27:54,910 --> 00:27:56,369
Look out! Muppets.

388
00:28:15,806 --> 00:28:20,681
Reckless endangerment of human life,
wilful disregard of private property...

389
00:28:20,769 --> 00:28:24,434
- He's really racking up the violations.
- Not him, you!

390
00:28:24,523 --> 00:28:28,057
Your ticket back to civilian life, Mr
I-Like-To-Throw-The-Book-Out-The-Window.

391
00:28:28,151 --> 00:28:29,859
That's a good idea.

392
00:28:37,327 --> 00:28:39,153
Ever been to Hawaii?

393
00:28:50,423 --> 00:28:52,665
Look out!

394
00:29:00,558 --> 00:29:02,431
Surf's up, but not for you.

395
00:29:02,518 --> 00:29:05,803
You'll be hanging 10 downtown.
Read him his rights.

396
00:29:05,896 --> 00:29:07,972
Emil Muzz, guess what!

397
00:29:08,065 --> 00:29:10,141
You are under arrest!

398
00:29:12,820 --> 00:29:15,393
Sit down, unless you're growing!

399
00:29:15,489 --> 00:29:18,525
We've got you on
'87 motre vehicle violations.

400
00:29:18,617 --> 00:29:21,369
It's only time before we tie you in
to one of those Pagan jobs.

401
00:29:21,453 --> 00:29:23,576
And you stole
your landlady's wedding dress...

402
00:29:23,664 --> 00:29:27,032
which is the only endearing thing
about you, so talk to us.

403
00:29:29,628 --> 00:29:32,415
Listen, you public pawn.
My attorney's on his way.

404
00:29:32,506 --> 00:29:35,709
We both know I'll be out
on bail.

405
00:29:35,800 --> 00:29:38,089
So take off these cuffs
and open the door!

406
00:29:38,178 --> 00:29:43,338
I wouldn't worry about the door. Scum
who'd represent you would ooze under it.

407
00:29:43,433 --> 00:29:47,217
Joe, why don't you go get
a couple cups of coffee?

408
00:29:47,312 --> 00:29:50,063
I could use one.
You want anything?

409
00:29:50,148 --> 00:29:53,980
Chewing gum, Snickers bar,
and my attorney, badge kisser!

410
00:30:10,084 --> 00:30:11,744
Well, Emil.

411
00:30:13,379 --> 00:30:15,537
It's just you...

412
00:30:16,674 --> 00:30:18,880
and me...

413
00:30:18,968 --> 00:30:20,925
and your balls...

414
00:30:21,011 --> 00:30:23,217
and this drawer.

415
00:30:40,363 --> 00:30:42,023
4:15 p.m.

416
00:30:42,115 --> 00:30:46,611
By the time I had returned with coffee,
Muzz was singing like Beverly Sills.

417
00:30:46,703 --> 00:30:49,787
He had been planning to attend a meeting
that night at the Pagan clubhouse...

418
00:30:49,873 --> 00:30:53,123
but he refused to divulge the time
or location of that meeting.

419
00:30:53,209 --> 00:30:55,534
Muzz, let's run through it again.

420
00:30:55,628 --> 00:30:59,377
You say you're a Pagan, but you work for
Jerry Caesar. That makes you a plant.

421
00:30:59,465 --> 00:31:02,087
Make it easy on yourself.
Lead us to the stolen magazines.

422
00:31:02,176 --> 00:31:04,335
Jump on this and spin, cop.

423
00:31:04,429 --> 00:31:07,595
I'm not saying another word
until my attorney gets here!

424
00:31:07,682 --> 00:31:08,927
Joe...

425
00:31:09,016 --> 00:31:13,477
wouldn't a couple of Danishes
go good with this coffee?

426
00:31:22,112 --> 00:31:26,027
At 7:13 p.m., Captain Gannon authorized
us to stake out Muzz's clubhouse...

427
00:31:26,116 --> 00:31:29,319
located in the ecologically-balanced
San Gabriel Mountains.

428
00:31:29,411 --> 00:31:32,495
When a code-5 authorization for
undercover surveillance is approved...

429
00:31:32,581 --> 00:31:36,495
officers proceed to the building
where the department has research...

430
00:31:36,585 --> 00:31:41,413
on the precise behaviour and dress
of today's average street gang member.

431
00:31:47,137 --> 00:31:50,553
Friday, I think we finally found
your look.

432
00:31:50,640 --> 00:31:52,218
9:56 p.m.

433
00:31:52,309 --> 00:31:55,559
We were issued appropriate apparel
and withdrew from receiving...

434
00:31:55,645 --> 00:31:59,477
one distressed
1985 unmarked Ford sedan.

435
00:31:59,566 --> 00:32:03,610
It's right up here, off highway 61!

436
00:32:03,695 --> 00:32:05,983
Yeah. Probably some
rat-hole roadhouse...

437
00:32:06,072 --> 00:32:09,523
where they watch TV
and suck beers all day.

438
00:32:12,078 --> 00:32:16,787
Uh-oh. Highway patrol.
And they're pulling us over.

439
00:32:32,723 --> 00:32:35,759
- Licence and registration.
- What was the offence?

440
00:32:35,851 --> 00:32:38,424
- It's okay. They're Pagans.
- Yeah?

441
00:32:38,520 --> 00:32:42,684
Yeah. Show 'em your card, Muzz, Emil.

442
00:32:42,774 --> 00:32:45,396
Yeah, that's right. That's me.

443
00:32:45,485 --> 00:32:47,811
Muzz, Emil. Emil Muzz.

444
00:32:47,904 --> 00:32:50,277
I've been sick.

445
00:32:50,365 --> 00:32:54,030
Sorry to bother you, fellas.
We can't be too careful, huh?

446
00:32:54,119 --> 00:32:56,491
We don't want any non-Pagans
around here.

447
00:32:56,580 --> 00:32:59,153
Especially tonight, right? Huh?

448
00:33:10,969 --> 00:33:14,005
Follow us, fellas.
The party's just starting!

449
00:33:21,062 --> 00:33:22,604
Bogus cops!

450
00:33:22,688 --> 00:33:26,188
No matter how many times I see that,
it never ceases to disgust me.

451
00:33:26,275 --> 00:33:29,940
People dressing up in strange clothes
pretending to be who they're not?

452
00:33:30,029 --> 00:33:32,698
Exactly! That kind of behaviour...

453
00:33:32,782 --> 00:33:34,988
Just get out that list
of stolen black and whites.

454
00:33:39,413 --> 00:33:42,699
9-9-9-4-7-4.
Oh, yeah, it's hot, all right.

455
00:33:42,791 --> 00:33:44,036
Yeah.

456
00:33:57,180 --> 00:33:59,636
Howdy. I'm Emil Muzz,
and I'm a Pagan.

457
00:34:15,240 --> 00:34:17,778
Good evening, Pagans.

458
00:34:17,867 --> 00:34:20,323
Don't forget your goat leggings.

459
00:34:33,758 --> 00:34:36,083
Must be every other stolen
police vehicle on our hot sheet.

460
00:34:36,177 --> 00:34:38,383
We're onto something here.

461
00:34:38,471 --> 00:34:40,594
You think so?

462
00:34:43,642 --> 00:34:45,931
- I see school is out.
- Yeah.

463
00:34:46,020 --> 00:34:50,017
All I can think of is 38 kids standing
individually on lonely corners...

464
00:34:50,107 --> 00:34:52,396
waiting for a bus
that will never come.

465
00:34:52,484 --> 00:34:55,569
Put your goat leggings on
and try to blend in.

466
00:35:07,958 --> 00:35:10,627
- Put it to sleep.
- Down, boys.

467
00:35:14,798 --> 00:35:18,083
You have to admire their techniques
in crowd control.

468
00:35:18,176 --> 00:35:22,470
Yeah. Cosy little group.
Just like your local Rotarians.

469
00:35:22,555 --> 00:35:26,933
Listen, we get a little wild
at times, sure...

470
00:35:27,018 --> 00:35:29,343
but nothing like this.

471
00:35:42,575 --> 00:35:47,700
I'd say this is shaping up to be a
little more than a series of robberies.

472
00:35:47,788 --> 00:35:52,035
"People against goodness and normalcy."

473
00:35:52,126 --> 00:35:54,368
P-A-G-A-N.

474
00:35:54,462 --> 00:35:56,086
Pagan.

475
00:35:56,172 --> 00:35:57,749
Nice work, Joe.

476
00:35:57,840 --> 00:36:03,082
Ah, here are two who have not yet
sipped the nectar of Shaitan.

477
00:36:10,811 --> 00:36:15,271
Small surprise before
the ceremony starts?

478
00:36:15,357 --> 00:36:17,895
Why not?

479
00:36:20,695 --> 00:36:22,984
- You?
- I had a big lunch.

480
00:36:24,783 --> 00:36:28,827
♪♪

481
00:36:57,231 --> 00:37:01,063
I, your High Priest...

482
00:37:01,152 --> 00:37:05,019
of living Pagan perfection...

483
00:37:05,114 --> 00:37:09,491
do call the name Gathool!

484
00:37:09,576 --> 00:37:11,865
Do call the name Gathool!

485
00:37:12,830 --> 00:37:14,656
Eelbazel!

486
00:37:14,748 --> 00:37:17,619
Ignodrohoth!

487
00:37:17,709 --> 00:37:19,501
Shaitan!

488
00:37:19,586 --> 00:37:23,204
Shaitan! Shaitan! Shaitan!

489
00:37:23,924 --> 00:37:26,000
Prepare the virgin.

490
00:37:30,096 --> 00:37:33,512
"Prepare the virgin."
I don't like the sound of that.

491
00:37:33,600 --> 00:37:36,055
Let's just hope
they're not referring to you.

492
00:37:37,145 --> 00:37:38,888
With this bat...

493
00:37:38,980 --> 00:37:41,851
I do consecrate.

494
00:37:41,941 --> 00:37:43,768
With this bat, he does consecrate.

495
00:37:43,860 --> 00:37:47,063
- The Madagascar Bat from the zoo.
- Good eye.

496
00:37:47,155 --> 00:37:50,072
With this lion's mane...

497
00:37:50,158 --> 00:37:51,782
I do consecrate.

498
00:37:51,868 --> 00:37:56,245
With this lion's mane,
he does consecrate.

499
00:37:56,330 --> 00:38:00,791
All that's missing is one humongous,
30-foot, groundhog-gulping reptile.

500
00:38:00,877 --> 00:38:04,292
For the final touch
to our brew tonight...

501
00:38:04,380 --> 00:38:08,757
a pristine virgin
in a gown of white.

502
00:38:21,313 --> 00:38:23,769
Evil bringeth here our plea.

503
00:38:23,857 --> 00:38:26,692
She's as pure as she can be.

504
00:38:26,777 --> 00:38:29,564
White and clean as driven snow.

505
00:38:29,655 --> 00:38:32,193
From Orange County, here we go!

506
00:38:37,329 --> 00:38:40,116
Two to one, that's Enid Borden's
wedding dress.

507
00:38:42,250 --> 00:38:45,999
Twenty to one, Enid Borden never looked
that beautiful on her wedding day.

508
00:38:46,087 --> 00:38:48,246
Virgin! Virgin!

509
00:38:48,340 --> 00:38:51,506
Virgin! Virgin!

510
00:38:55,722 --> 00:38:57,880
- Friday!
- Let's move!

511
00:39:05,606 --> 00:39:07,599
Help!

512
00:39:07,692 --> 00:39:09,102
Can you swim?

513
00:39:09,193 --> 00:39:11,731
Red Cross. Junior Lifesaver
with clusters.

514
00:39:11,821 --> 00:39:13,813
Silly me.

515
00:39:19,912 --> 00:39:23,162
- Friday!
- Streebek?

516
00:39:23,249 --> 00:39:25,656
I found the snake.

517
00:39:25,751 --> 00:39:28,289
Help! Help!

518
00:39:29,380 --> 00:39:31,538
- Help!
- Hang in there. I'm coming.

519
00:39:31,632 --> 00:39:34,383
What goes on?
Who are those two clowns?

520
00:39:34,468 --> 00:39:36,875
Who are you?

521
00:39:36,970 --> 00:39:39,841
Friday, Streebek,
Los Angeles police officers.

522
00:39:44,102 --> 00:39:47,637
- Where are you from?
- Anaheim.

523
00:39:49,316 --> 00:39:51,474
Her favourite colour is blue.

524
00:39:51,568 --> 00:39:53,726
Jesus Christ! I'm about to be eaten!

525
00:39:56,156 --> 00:40:00,023
Some big guys grabbed me
off the street last night.

526
00:40:01,661 --> 00:40:06,952
- Were you sexually assaulted?
- No, thank God. They needed a virgin.

527
00:40:08,001 --> 00:40:10,408
You're still a virgin?

528
00:40:11,713 --> 00:40:14,417
My hat's off to you, ma'am.
Hope you stay that way.

529
00:40:17,635 --> 00:40:21,419
Streebek, quick! Do something.
It's constricting.

530
00:40:21,514 --> 00:40:24,265
Distract it.

531
00:40:50,208 --> 00:40:51,952
Anybody need boots?

532
00:40:55,839 --> 00:40:57,214
Stop them!

533
00:40:57,299 --> 00:40:58,709
Go!

534
00:41:13,064 --> 00:41:16,065
Kill the good! Kill the good!

535
00:41:16,150 --> 00:41:20,362
Kill the good! Kill the good!
Kill the good! Kill the good!

536
00:41:20,446 --> 00:41:23,447
Kill the good! Kill the good!
Kill the good!

537
00:41:23,533 --> 00:41:25,157
You are under arrest.

538
00:41:27,328 --> 00:41:29,119
You can remain silent.

539
00:41:29,205 --> 00:41:33,867
If you waive that right, anything you
say can and will be used against you.

540
00:41:33,959 --> 00:41:36,747
For crying out loud!

541
00:41:49,016 --> 00:41:51,507
How come his is so much bigger
than yours?

542
00:41:51,602 --> 00:41:53,927
- Miss?
- The gun.

543
00:41:54,021 --> 00:41:56,891
I've never needed more.

544
00:42:12,956 --> 00:42:14,948
Come on, Joe!

545
00:42:24,175 --> 00:42:26,547
Gosh! I'm terribly sorry!

546
00:42:35,144 --> 00:42:37,469
Our car! We can steal it back.

547
00:42:37,563 --> 00:42:39,188
Right.

548
00:42:39,273 --> 00:42:41,147
I'll drive.

549
00:42:43,402 --> 00:42:46,107
Forget it. We're responsible
for a civilian's safety.

550
00:42:46,197 --> 00:42:49,233
And frankly, you don't belong
behind the wheel of a car.

551
00:42:58,333 --> 00:43:00,622
Hang on and keep your head down.

552
00:43:12,764 --> 00:43:14,424
Good driving!

553
00:43:14,516 --> 00:43:17,137
Yes, you were wonderful.

554
00:43:17,227 --> 00:43:20,560
Excuse me, miss.
I never did catch your name.

555
00:43:20,647 --> 00:43:24,265
Swail. Connie Swail.

556
00:43:24,359 --> 00:43:27,644
- Your name is Friday?
- Joe.

557
00:43:27,737 --> 00:43:29,730
Joe.

558
00:43:31,449 --> 00:43:33,157
Joe.

559
00:43:38,081 --> 00:43:40,239
Pep.

560
00:43:40,333 --> 00:43:42,076
Pep Streebek.

561
00:43:43,211 --> 00:43:45,666
Glad to meet you.

562
00:43:54,221 --> 00:43:57,424
You certainly have
a beautiful home, Miss Swail.

563
00:43:57,516 --> 00:44:01,134
You bet. Can the Beaver
come out and play?

564
00:44:11,989 --> 00:44:13,898
- Good night.
- Good night.

565
00:44:21,164 --> 00:44:23,869
Will I ever see you again, Joe?

566
00:44:23,959 --> 00:44:26,746
Absolutely.
You're our main witness.

567
00:44:26,836 --> 00:44:29,588
We'd like you to come downtown,
take a look at the mug books...

568
00:44:29,673 --> 00:44:32,080
see if you can make a positive I.D.
On the man you saw.

569
00:44:32,175 --> 00:44:34,862
I'll have a policewoman come here
tonight, keep an eye on the house...

570
00:44:34,886 --> 00:44:37,044
and bring you downtown
to Parker Center tomorrow.

571
00:44:37,138 --> 00:44:38,763
Here's my card.

572
00:44:39,933 --> 00:44:43,099
You'll be needed
for further questioning.

573
00:44:52,028 --> 00:44:54,945
I don't know why, but...

574
00:44:55,031 --> 00:44:58,862
somehow I feel
I could tell you anything, Joe.

575
00:45:03,289 --> 00:45:06,622
Friday, January 9, 3:12 a.m.

576
00:45:06,709 --> 00:45:09,663
We returned from Anaheim where we had
dropped off the virgin Connie Swail.

577
00:45:09,753 --> 00:45:12,873
I telephoned Captain Gannon at home,
waking him.

578
00:45:12,965 --> 00:45:15,882
After absorbing minutes
of gratuitous verbal abuse...

579
00:45:15,968 --> 00:45:19,052
I requested him to meet us
as soon as possible at his office.

580
00:45:20,222 --> 00:45:21,846
Come in.

581
00:45:21,932 --> 00:45:24,138
- Evening, Captain.
- Captain.

582
00:45:25,811 --> 00:45:27,768
3:35 a.m.

583
00:45:27,854 --> 00:45:30,939
We related the details of our successful
follow-up on the Pagan robberies...

584
00:45:31,024 --> 00:45:34,310
and briefed Captain Gannon on the
outlandish festival we had attended...

585
00:45:34,402 --> 00:45:36,561
even going so far
as to demonstrate the goat dance...

586
00:45:36,655 --> 00:45:39,821
we had engaged in
as part of our undercover role.

587
00:45:42,702 --> 00:45:46,914
This music was pulsating
over and over again.

588
00:45:50,335 --> 00:45:51,995
Stop it!

589
00:45:52,086 --> 00:45:54,708
At this point, Captain Gannon
became quite upset.

590
00:45:54,797 --> 00:45:56,837
He accused us of being
on a drinking binge...

591
00:45:56,924 --> 00:46:00,293
and based on our appearance, seemed
reluctant to contact the sheriff...

592
00:46:00,386 --> 00:46:02,295
to investigate the area.

593
00:46:02,388 --> 00:46:05,923
Captain, call the sheriff's department.
I have the directions to the compound.

594
00:46:13,440 --> 00:46:15,018
Hay fever?

595
00:46:15,109 --> 00:46:17,351
Illegal hallucinogenic love drugs.

596
00:46:17,444 --> 00:46:20,694
The Pagans were taking them.
We tried to fit in.

597
00:46:20,781 --> 00:46:23,301
If it weren't for the drugs, we couldn't
have gotten away from the snake.

598
00:46:23,325 --> 00:46:25,116
The snake!

599
00:46:25,202 --> 00:46:29,034
I forgot about the snake.
How big did you say it was again?

600
00:46:29,122 --> 00:46:30,581
- 30 feet.
- 20 feet.

601
00:46:30,666 --> 00:46:35,244
We'd like to have you come to the crime
scene and visually verify our report.

602
00:46:35,337 --> 00:46:37,329
If you could call
Commissioner Kirkpatrick...

603
00:46:37,422 --> 00:46:40,756
we believe this incident, because of its
magnitude, is worthy of her attention.

604
00:46:40,842 --> 00:46:44,092
Do you have any idea
what time it is?

605
00:46:44,179 --> 00:46:46,385
- Yes, sir.
- Don't ask him that, Captain.

606
00:46:46,473 --> 00:46:50,422
- It's 4:27 a.m., sir.
- He lives for that. It's in his blood.

607
00:46:52,645 --> 00:46:55,136
Thursday, January 8, 5:45 a.m.

608
00:46:55,231 --> 00:46:58,398
Having gained Captain Gannon's grudging
agreement to contact the commissioner...

609
00:46:58,484 --> 00:47:01,022
and proceed with us
to the San Gabriel Mountains...

610
00:47:01,112 --> 00:47:04,896
we eventually arrived at the scene
of the previous night's debauchery.

611
00:47:12,623 --> 00:47:16,206
What is this?
Some sort of juvenile cop humour?

612
00:47:16,293 --> 00:47:18,963
And where the hell
is this supposed Pagan festival?

613
00:47:19,046 --> 00:47:22,830
I can't understand it. There was a huge
screen with Pagan vision written on it.

614
00:47:22,925 --> 00:47:26,341
Yeah! Yeah! This was the hole
that was filled with water.

615
00:47:26,428 --> 00:47:30,212
We had to dive in to save the virgin
being eaten by the giant snake.

616
00:47:30,307 --> 00:47:33,012
Who are these painted cretins?

617
00:47:33,102 --> 00:47:37,146
- Two of my best men, ma'am.
- That's right. That's right.

618
00:47:37,231 --> 00:47:39,603
They're heading up
the Pagan investigation.

619
00:47:39,691 --> 00:47:43,985
They were heading up the investigation.
Now you may consider them off it.

620
00:47:44,071 --> 00:47:46,692
- But, Commissioner?
- Gannon.

621
00:47:46,782 --> 00:47:49,319
What am I going to tell the press?

622
00:47:49,409 --> 00:47:52,908
That now we are investigating
invisible crimes on the word of two...

623
00:47:52,996 --> 00:47:54,739
trick-or-treaters?

624
00:47:54,831 --> 00:47:58,117
You are a civilian and probably unaware
the department's "regs"...

625
00:47:58,209 --> 00:48:01,376
authorize us to wear specialized apparel
during a simulation surveillance.

626
00:48:02,380 --> 00:48:06,959
- I assume you were once a civilian.
- Yes, ma'am.

627
00:48:07,051 --> 00:48:11,429
If you do not drop that insubordinate
tone, you'll be one again soon.

628
00:48:14,016 --> 00:48:15,808
Wait a minute, Friday.

629
00:48:17,270 --> 00:48:19,939
I've never known you to act this way.

630
00:48:20,022 --> 00:48:24,067
Certainly not the behaviour
your Uncle Joe would have approved of.

631
00:48:24,151 --> 00:48:27,271
You know the kind of man he was.

632
00:48:28,155 --> 00:48:32,319
I suggest you try to be
a little more like him from now on.

633
00:48:32,409 --> 00:48:34,367
Yeah, sir. I'll try.

634
00:48:35,412 --> 00:48:36,491
Good.

635
00:48:53,263 --> 00:48:57,012
I'm sorry, Joe.
He's not in any of these.

636
00:48:57,100 --> 00:48:59,176
And I'll never forget his face.

637
00:49:00,228 --> 00:49:05,270
Okay. I guess this officially closes
my end of the investigation.

638
00:49:09,320 --> 00:49:12,772
As far as your personal safety
is concerned, I wouldn't worry.

639
00:49:12,866 --> 00:49:15,783
That guy's probably
200 miles from here by now.

640
00:49:24,836 --> 00:49:29,213
10:30 a.m. I picked up Streebek at his
sanitationally-questionable commune...

641
00:49:29,298 --> 00:49:32,382
his apartment building in the "come
as you are" section of Venice Beach.

642
00:49:45,981 --> 00:49:49,101
The door was opened
by Police Officer Betsy Blees...

643
00:49:49,193 --> 00:49:53,522
who had dropped by to chat about more
effective methods of law enforcement.

644
00:49:53,614 --> 00:49:56,069
They'd been playing a version
of good-cop, bad-cop.

645
00:49:56,158 --> 00:50:00,369
Though I was unable to fathom the rules,
it seemed Streebek had lost this round.

646
00:50:01,663 --> 00:50:03,620
Playtime was over...

647
00:50:03,707 --> 00:50:06,280
and it was back to routine duty
for me and Pep Streebek.

648
00:50:06,376 --> 00:50:11,501
Joe, I suddenly got very hungry.
Let's grab some sushi.

649
00:50:11,589 --> 00:50:15,539
We're late for our watch already,
and raw tuna isn't my bag.

650
00:50:35,071 --> 00:50:37,194
My hat was in that car.

651
00:50:37,281 --> 00:50:41,065
- I can tell who reblocked it for you.
- Pagans.

652
00:50:41,160 --> 00:50:42,571
I need coffee.

653
00:50:42,661 --> 00:50:45,283
I know where they serve
the best in town. Come on.

654
00:50:45,372 --> 00:50:49,452
♪♪

655
00:51:14,985 --> 00:51:16,479
Ma'am.

656
00:51:26,246 --> 00:51:30,623
I hate to admit it, but for once in your
life you're right. This is good coffee.

657
00:51:30,708 --> 00:51:32,915
You should try the French toast.

658
00:51:33,002 --> 00:51:35,244
Joe, lend me 20 bucks.

659
00:51:35,338 --> 00:51:38,921
Do I know you long enough
to lend you money? I don't think so.

660
00:51:39,008 --> 00:51:40,917
We've been ordered off the Pagans...

661
00:51:41,010 --> 00:51:44,545
but that doesn't mean we can't follow up
on one of their thefts.

662
00:51:44,639 --> 00:51:48,090
The trichlornitromethane and
the pseudo-halogenic compound cyanogen.

663
00:51:48,184 --> 00:51:53,142
There's one illegal lab in the city with
the capacity, personnel and equipment...

664
00:51:53,230 --> 00:51:55,389
to mix those two chemicals
into a deadly gas.

665
00:51:55,483 --> 00:51:59,397
Narcotics has been waiting for months to
bust this place. We can do it tonight.

666
00:51:59,486 --> 00:52:02,191
Forget it.
It's out of our jurisdiction now.

667
00:52:02,281 --> 00:52:05,946
But this won't be a Pagan investigation.
We can bring Narc in on it.

668
00:52:06,034 --> 00:52:10,531
Police work is a matter of us
against them, not "Mother, may I?"

669
00:52:10,622 --> 00:52:14,620
Hi, Kay. How are you? I could find out
where they set up the lab this week.

670
00:52:14,710 --> 00:52:18,079
- Oh? How?
- By you lending me 20 bucks.

671
00:52:26,137 --> 00:52:30,349
6:30 p.m. After witnessing the gratuitous sex display...

672
00:52:30,433 --> 00:52:33,600
at Streebek's favourite coffeehouse
and an outlay of $50 by me...

673
00:52:33,686 --> 00:52:38,064
to one of his old informants,
I proceeded by Celebrity Cab...

674
00:52:38,149 --> 00:52:40,901
to 3396834108th Street...

675
00:52:40,985 --> 00:52:44,853
an illegal drug lab disguised
as a legitimate place of business.

676
00:52:45,990 --> 00:52:47,968
Streebek had gone to seek assistance
from friends...

677
00:52:47,992 --> 00:52:50,863
in the undercover narcotics unit
where he used to work.

678
00:52:50,953 --> 00:52:52,862
It didn't surprise me
that he was late...

679
00:52:52,955 --> 00:52:54,975
even though he knew I was waiting
in a part of town...

680
00:52:54,999 --> 00:52:58,119
where it's not advisable
to stand around whistling.

681
00:52:58,210 --> 00:53:01,994
♪♪

682
00:53:03,883 --> 00:53:05,922
Hey, zipper-head!

683
00:53:09,471 --> 00:53:11,594
Up late tonight, kids?

684
00:53:11,682 --> 00:53:13,639
Let's have one of your smokes.

685
00:53:13,726 --> 00:53:16,181
It's an unhealthy habit
I don't encourage in others.

686
00:53:16,270 --> 00:53:18,476
Get smart.
Give it up by not taking it up.

687
00:53:18,564 --> 00:53:20,473
Thanks for
the public service announcement.

688
00:53:20,566 --> 00:53:23,934
Hand over your money,
and I'll go buy my own smokes.

689
00:53:24,027 --> 00:53:27,147
If you're that strapped for cash,
I'd suggest a part-time job.

690
00:53:27,239 --> 00:53:29,148
How 'bout a paper route?

691
00:53:29,241 --> 00:53:31,566
It builds character.
It did in my case.

692
00:53:31,660 --> 00:53:35,657
Hey, we're not askin' you
for your money, Ozzie.

693
00:53:35,747 --> 00:53:38,155
- No?
- No.

694
00:53:38,249 --> 00:53:43,125
- Are you threatening me, son?
- Ooh!

695
00:54:15,160 --> 00:54:17,533
And on a school night, too.

696
00:54:37,307 --> 00:54:38,885
Hit the deck!

697
00:55:13,801 --> 00:55:16,007
I can't quite place it.

698
00:55:17,430 --> 00:55:18,840
It tastes like...

699
00:55:18,931 --> 00:55:20,509
Milk.

700
00:55:20,599 --> 00:55:24,015
Just like the sign said on the building
before you obliterated it.

701
00:55:24,103 --> 00:55:26,772
Fresh, wholesome milk.

702
00:55:26,855 --> 00:55:29,429
You probably love this stuff,
don't you?

703
00:55:29,525 --> 00:55:32,276
Vitamin D, calcium...

704
00:55:32,361 --> 00:55:35,481
essential for good strong bones
and healthy teeth.

705
00:55:35,572 --> 00:55:39,356
But that's probably all Greek to you,
isn't it, Mr Gingivitis?

706
00:55:42,663 --> 00:55:44,620
7:15 p.m.

707
00:55:44,706 --> 00:55:48,870
After explaining to the milk factory
they could not take legal action...

708
00:55:48,960 --> 00:55:50,953
since we had properly obtained
a search warrant...

709
00:55:51,046 --> 00:55:52,955
our apology was
reluctantly accepted...

710
00:55:53,048 --> 00:55:56,547
and Streebek and I were on
our way back to Parker Center.

711
00:55:56,634 --> 00:55:59,339
After losing two previous vehicles
we had been issued...

712
00:55:59,429 --> 00:56:02,050
the only car the department would
release to us at this point...

713
00:56:02,140 --> 00:56:05,057
was an unmarked 1987 Yugo...

714
00:56:05,143 --> 00:56:09,354
a Yugoslavian import donated
as a test vehicle by that country...

715
00:56:09,439 --> 00:56:13,187
and reflecting the cutting edge
of Serbo-Croatian technology.

716
00:56:49,478 --> 00:56:52,644
I've been thinking.
Maybe your informant was right.

717
00:56:52,731 --> 00:56:54,688
Maybe the Pagans anticipated our raid...

718
00:56:54,775 --> 00:56:57,348
and mixed those chemicals
into a deadly gas before we got there.

719
00:56:57,444 --> 00:57:00,113
Nuh-huh.

720
00:57:00,197 --> 00:57:02,652
- Friday?
- That's me.

721
00:57:02,741 --> 00:57:04,650
What do you like to do for fun?

722
00:57:06,077 --> 00:57:08,948
I'm your partner, and
I don't even know where you live.

723
00:57:09,038 --> 00:57:10,948
That's right, mister, you don't.

724
00:57:13,960 --> 00:57:17,210
Streebek, why are you always looking
at your watch?

725
00:57:17,297 --> 00:57:19,206
I'm watching my TV.

726
00:57:19,298 --> 00:57:23,841
You don't like my music, you don't want
to talk, so I'm watching my TV.

727
00:57:23,928 --> 00:57:25,885
We're at the Law and Order
Foundation dinner...

728
00:57:25,972 --> 00:57:30,052
where Los Angeles mayor, Peter Parvin,
is fighting for his political survival.

729
00:57:30,142 --> 00:57:34,057
Leading that attack again is
Police Commissioner Jane Kirkpatrick.

730
00:57:34,146 --> 00:57:36,554
Let's hear what she has to say.

731
00:57:36,649 --> 00:57:41,311
This rampaging gang of Pagans has made
a mockery of city administration.

732
00:57:41,403 --> 00:57:44,488
Vehicles from the fire and police
departments are stolen in daylight.

733
00:57:44,573 --> 00:57:49,912
Deadly toxic chemicals are on the loose.
What next, Mr Mayor?

734
00:57:49,995 --> 00:57:51,988
In my opinion...

735
00:57:52,080 --> 00:57:55,366
Mayor Parvin should consider
the welfare of his constituents...

736
00:57:55,459 --> 00:57:57,747
and do the honourable thing:

737
00:57:57,836 --> 00:57:59,710
Resign now.

738
00:58:02,674 --> 00:58:05,960
You know, I think you and the
commissioner would make a cute couple.

739
00:58:06,052 --> 00:58:08,010
You both keep your jaws locked.

740
00:58:08,096 --> 00:58:11,382
Plus you two share
that curious affection for hats.

741
00:58:11,474 --> 00:58:13,930
May I remind you that
Commissioner Kirkpatrick...

742
00:58:14,019 --> 00:58:16,770
threatened to turn me
into a civilian?

743
00:58:16,855 --> 00:58:19,772
Yeah, I know.
There was a gleam in her eye, though.

744
00:58:19,858 --> 00:58:21,601
Put a clamp on it!

745
00:58:21,693 --> 00:58:24,777
I have never been elected
to public office.

746
00:58:24,862 --> 00:58:29,441
I have always sought the approval
of a somewhat higher power...

747
00:58:29,534 --> 00:58:31,028
for my actions.

748
00:58:31,119 --> 00:58:34,119
The sad truth...

749
00:58:34,205 --> 00:58:36,957
is that we live here now
in a city...

750
00:58:37,041 --> 00:58:41,121
where even a gross pornographer
like Jerry Caesar...

751
00:58:41,212 --> 00:58:44,415
is not immune from lawlessness!

752
00:58:44,507 --> 00:58:48,456
With this grim fact in mind...

753
00:58:48,552 --> 00:58:52,087
I am relieved to announce tonight...

754
00:58:52,181 --> 00:58:55,632
that even Mr Caesar himself
has bravely decided...

755
00:58:55,726 --> 00:58:58,762
to strike a blow in our common fight
against crime!

756
00:58:58,854 --> 00:59:00,811
Yes, sir! Yes, indeed!

757
00:59:02,399 --> 00:59:05,815
This guy knows God personally.
I hear they play racquetball together.

758
00:59:05,902 --> 00:59:09,318
Just chuckle away.
I don't hear God laughing.

759
00:59:09,406 --> 00:59:11,813
You will once He sees your haircut.

760
00:59:12,826 --> 00:59:17,571
My friends, in an unprecedented
gesture of atonement...

761
00:59:17,664 --> 00:59:21,448
Mr Caesar has agreed
to donate the sum...

762
00:59:21,543 --> 00:59:26,335
of $1 million
to my Moral Advance Movement.

763
00:59:30,385 --> 00:59:32,342
7:52 p.m.

764
00:59:32,428 --> 00:59:35,513
After witnessing the raging political
turmoil on Streebek's puny TV...

765
00:59:35,598 --> 00:59:38,884
I was really looking forward
to the end of a rotten day.

766
00:59:38,976 --> 00:59:43,354
- Well, want to get something to eat?
- Not tonight. I have plans.

767
00:59:43,439 --> 00:59:46,974
You do? What? What?

768
00:59:47,068 --> 00:59:50,353
Where do you go? What is her name?
Does she have a sister?

769
00:59:50,446 --> 00:59:52,604
Good night, Streebek.

770
00:59:55,367 --> 00:59:58,571
Truth is, I don't care where you go.

771
01:00:02,625 --> 01:00:04,747
Yeah, I do.
I gotta know.

772
01:00:32,320 --> 01:00:34,229
I knew it.

773
01:00:34,322 --> 01:00:36,813
It's Nightmare on Elm Street.

774
01:00:36,908 --> 01:00:40,573
That would make him Freddie Krueger.

775
01:00:41,955 --> 01:00:44,516
We're gonna be driving along some night
and the lighting's gonna be bad.

776
01:00:44,540 --> 01:00:48,668
He's gonna mistake me for some
pretty coed, and out comes that claw.

777
01:00:54,133 --> 01:00:56,173
170 pounds of ground chuck.

778
01:00:58,846 --> 01:01:03,923
Who knows what kind of thrill-seeking
hose monster he's got stashed in there?

779
01:01:10,691 --> 01:01:14,274
My God, he's dating Mother Goose!
Hey, Joe!

780
01:01:14,361 --> 01:01:17,611
Streebek, what are you doing here?

781
01:01:17,698 --> 01:01:21,067
- Who is this nice-looking young man?
- He's nobody.

782
01:01:21,159 --> 01:01:22,951
My partner.

783
01:01:23,036 --> 01:01:26,121
Streebek, introduce yourself
to my grandmother, quickly.

784
01:01:26,206 --> 01:01:29,789
Well, what a pleasant surprise.

785
01:01:29,876 --> 01:01:31,785
Granny Friday.

786
01:01:31,878 --> 01:01:35,378
She's my maternal grandmother.
Her name is Mundy.

787
01:01:36,675 --> 01:01:39,960
Why don't we discuss this over dinner?
It's my birthday.

788
01:01:40,053 --> 01:01:44,300
We're going to the Brown Derby.
Do join us, Detective Swayback.

789
01:01:44,390 --> 01:01:46,300
- Streebek.
- Pep.

790
01:01:46,392 --> 01:01:48,385
I don't think it's a good idea.

791
01:01:49,145 --> 01:01:51,980
- Why not, Joe?
- Yeah, Joe, why not?

792
01:01:52,065 --> 01:01:57,403
I've invited someone already
to join us, and you don't know her.

793
01:01:57,487 --> 01:01:58,815
- Her?
- Her?

794
01:01:58,905 --> 01:02:02,108
Joe! You have a date?

795
01:02:07,204 --> 01:02:09,778
I'm so proud!

796
01:02:13,210 --> 01:02:16,662
Well, it looks like
I have a date, too.

797
01:02:16,755 --> 01:02:19,875
Granny Mundy, may I escort you
to Joe's car?

798
01:02:19,967 --> 01:02:23,466
I'd be privileged,
Detective Startrek.

799
01:02:27,558 --> 01:02:31,686
9:00 p.m. Exactly one night after
witnessing the satanic cult rally...

800
01:02:31,770 --> 01:02:36,266
I escorted my grandmother to her
favourite restaurant, the Brown Derby.

801
01:02:36,358 --> 01:02:41,185
There was someone I wanted her to meet,
and it wasn't Detective Streebek.

802
01:02:41,279 --> 01:02:43,687
Sergeant Friday, your table is ready.

803
01:02:43,782 --> 01:02:46,617
I took the liberty of pouring
the Dom Perignon.

804
01:02:46,701 --> 01:02:48,160
What Dom Perignon?

805
01:02:48,244 --> 01:02:52,491
I stopped and phoned in an order
in honour of Granny Mundy's birthday.

806
01:02:52,582 --> 01:02:55,618
You'd want her to have
the most expensive kind, wouldn't you?

807
01:02:55,710 --> 01:02:59,708
What a thoughtful gesture!
Don't you think so, Joe?

808
01:02:59,797 --> 01:03:03,131
Yes, Granny.
It was very considerate of him.

809
01:03:12,351 --> 01:03:15,720
Hello, Joe.
Guess I'm early.

810
01:03:15,813 --> 01:03:17,722
I was kind of excited.

811
01:03:17,815 --> 01:03:19,891
You sly minx!

812
01:03:21,610 --> 01:03:24,445
I'd like you to meet my maternal
grandmother, Mrs. Grace Mundy.

813
01:03:24,530 --> 01:03:26,522
Granny, this is
the virgin Connie Swail.

814
01:03:28,492 --> 01:03:29,903
You're kidding?

815
01:03:29,994 --> 01:03:31,903
Hi.

816
01:03:31,995 --> 01:03:35,696
Well, allow me.
The place of honour for Granny.

817
01:03:35,791 --> 01:03:38,116
- Thank you.
- Certainly.

818
01:03:40,671 --> 01:03:43,340
And if I may, a toast.

819
01:03:43,423 --> 01:03:44,882
To Granny Mundy.

820
01:03:44,966 --> 01:03:48,170
May you live as long as you want
but never want as long as you live.

821
01:03:50,180 --> 01:03:51,639
Hear! Hear!

822
01:03:55,018 --> 01:03:57,591
Ahhh.

823
01:03:57,687 --> 01:03:59,929
This is such a happy restaurant.

824
01:04:00,023 --> 01:04:03,024
Commissioner Kirkpatrick,
how nice to see you again.

825
01:04:03,109 --> 01:04:05,600
Reverend Whirley,
it's a privilege.

826
01:04:07,780 --> 01:04:09,690
An aperitif, perhaps?

827
01:04:09,782 --> 01:04:13,116
I once saw Alan Hale, Jr. In here.

828
01:04:13,202 --> 01:04:16,737
Alan Hale, Jr! Wow!
"Gilligan, little buddy!"

829
01:04:16,831 --> 01:04:21,623
Don't order anything more expensive than
the Cobb salad. That is an order.

830
01:04:21,711 --> 01:04:24,462
Oh, my God!

831
01:04:24,547 --> 01:04:26,954
- Connie?
- That's him.

832
01:04:27,049 --> 01:04:29,208
That man with the collar.

833
01:04:29,301 --> 01:04:31,211
The Reverend Whirley?

834
01:04:31,303 --> 01:04:34,803
He's the one who kidnapped me
and threw me in that pit...

835
01:04:34,890 --> 01:04:37,049
with that horrible snake.

836
01:04:38,185 --> 01:04:41,139
I'll never forget his face
as long as I live.

837
01:04:41,230 --> 01:04:43,851
You have to be sure about this.

838
01:04:43,941 --> 01:04:46,811
How about very, very sure?

839
01:04:46,902 --> 01:04:49,274
I'm positive, Joe.

840
01:04:49,363 --> 01:04:51,236
That's him.

841
01:04:51,323 --> 01:04:53,280
The face behind the mask.

842
01:04:54,910 --> 01:04:57,483
The man who tried to kill me.

843
01:05:00,874 --> 01:05:03,910
Would you testify to that under oath
in a court of law?

844
01:05:04,002 --> 01:05:06,754
Wait a minute. Settle down.

845
01:05:06,838 --> 01:05:10,123
Let's think about this.
That is Jonathan Whirley.

846
01:05:10,216 --> 01:05:13,502
Head of the Moral Advance Movement
of America. He's a public hero.

847
01:05:13,595 --> 01:05:17,426
- You can't just walk up to him...
- Streebek.

848
01:05:17,515 --> 01:05:19,673
Vermin aren't allowed
inside restaurants.

849
01:05:19,767 --> 01:05:21,926
I'll be enforcing
the public health code.

850
01:05:23,771 --> 01:05:25,930
If you'll both excuse me...

851
01:05:26,023 --> 01:05:29,523
I'm afraid
the second-highest duty calls.

852
01:05:34,782 --> 01:05:38,317
Joe, he is sitting with the commissioner
and our captain.

853
01:05:38,410 --> 01:05:41,862
Bust him now, tomorrow you'll
be mucking out stalls at Horse Patrol.

854
01:05:49,213 --> 01:05:50,623
Thank you.

855
01:05:52,674 --> 01:05:54,085
I am sorry.

856
01:05:54,176 --> 01:05:57,130
Hold it there, Whirley. Police Officer.
You're under arrest.

857
01:05:57,220 --> 01:05:59,628
I beg your pardon?
Is this some sort of feeble joke?

858
01:05:59,723 --> 01:06:05,393
Oh, it's a knee-slapper, if you consider
Penal Codes 484207 A597 and 217...

859
01:06:05,479 --> 01:06:08,374
theft, kidnapping, cruelty to animals,
attempted murder things to laugh about.

860
01:06:08,398 --> 01:06:10,854
I don't know
what you're talking about.

861
01:06:10,942 --> 01:06:13,729
My partner and I witnessed
that torchlight picnic you threw.

862
01:06:13,820 --> 01:06:17,485
We're gonna put you where your kind
always ends up: In a 7-by-7 cage...

863
01:06:17,574 --> 01:06:21,903
in some hundred-year-old penitentiary
with a wooden plank for a bed.

864
01:06:21,995 --> 01:06:25,446
Sure, this city isn't perfect. We need
a smut-free life for all our citizens.

865
01:06:25,540 --> 01:06:27,828
Cleaner streets, better schools,
a good hockey team.

866
01:06:27,917 --> 01:06:31,915
But the difference between you and me is
you made the promise, I'm gonna keep it.

867
01:06:45,893 --> 01:06:49,807
Our good reverend's an amazing
piece of work, isn't he, Jane?

868
01:06:49,897 --> 01:06:52,981
- May I call you Jane?
- No.

869
01:07:00,908 --> 01:07:03,149
Captain, Commissioner...

870
01:07:03,243 --> 01:07:06,280
I demand an immediate explanation
for this outrageous behaviour.

871
01:07:06,371 --> 01:07:08,494
It's him again.

872
01:07:08,582 --> 01:07:10,989
Are you insane?

873
01:07:11,084 --> 01:07:14,833
Reverend Whirley abducted that girl,
had his men throw her in a pit...

874
01:07:14,921 --> 01:07:17,792
filled with polluted water
and a giant Bolivian jungle snake.

875
01:07:17,883 --> 01:07:20,552
These accusations are preposterous!

876
01:07:20,635 --> 01:07:24,419
I beg to differ. Ask him if he remembers
3,000 gallons of stolen...

877
01:07:24,514 --> 01:07:27,515
trichlornitromethane and the
pseudo-halogenic compound cyanogen...

878
01:07:27,600 --> 01:07:29,787
which, when mixed properly,
form a liquid fertilizer that burns...

879
01:07:29,811 --> 01:07:33,346
the throat, eyes, lungs, and nose,
and could cause vomiting and death.

880
01:07:33,439 --> 01:07:36,191
We're just about to eat here!

881
01:07:36,275 --> 01:07:40,107
Reverend Whirley, please accept
our most sincere apologies.

882
01:07:40,196 --> 01:07:43,363
Sergeant, you will remove
those handcuffs immediately.

883
01:07:43,449 --> 01:07:46,320
Then you will hand in your badge.
You are relieved from duty.

884
01:07:46,410 --> 01:07:47,952
But... But...
But, Commissioner...

885
01:07:48,037 --> 01:07:49,531
Now!

886
01:07:51,540 --> 01:07:53,663
Yes, sir. Ma'am.

887
01:07:53,751 --> 01:07:57,001
I don't care.
I'm absolutely humiliated.

888
01:07:57,087 --> 01:08:01,132
I know the young man was overzealous,
but he springs from a great tradition.

889
01:08:01,216 --> 01:08:04,502
Commissioner, won't you please
change your mind?

890
01:08:16,481 --> 01:08:20,064
I'm afraid I'll have to take
your badge and gun.

891
01:08:20,152 --> 01:08:24,196
- If we could just please...
- I don't want to discuss it!

892
01:08:24,281 --> 01:08:26,902
Just hand them over.

893
01:08:56,979 --> 01:09:02,021
Look, Joe, don't worry. I'm still
on active duty. I'm building a case.

894
01:09:02,109 --> 01:09:04,398
You're building nothin'.

895
01:09:04,487 --> 01:09:08,650
If I ever hear you've come
within one mile of Reverend Whirley...

896
01:09:08,741 --> 01:09:10,733
I'll have your badge for breakfast!

897
01:09:10,826 --> 01:09:13,946
- Understood?
- Yes, sir.

898
01:09:22,045 --> 01:09:26,125
It was very nice of you to try
and take us out to dinner, Joe.

899
01:09:26,216 --> 01:09:29,965
Yeah. Thanks, Joe, for everything.

900
01:09:31,721 --> 01:09:36,632
Let's not stand around here moping.
I'm hungry! Let's go for chili dogs.

901
01:09:36,726 --> 01:09:42,065
Granny, have you ever eaten a chili dog
off the back of a motorcycle?

902
01:09:42,148 --> 01:09:44,057
Not till now.

903
01:09:44,150 --> 01:09:47,602
You smooth-talking son of a gun.

904
01:09:57,663 --> 01:10:00,581
- Thank you.
- You're welcome.

905
01:10:05,671 --> 01:10:08,458
I'm very sorry
you lost your job, Joe.

906
01:10:08,549 --> 01:10:10,838
I really did have
a very good time.

907
01:10:10,926 --> 01:10:13,133
I'm glad, Connie.

908
01:10:13,220 --> 01:10:16,257
Now, fasten your seat belt.
I can still effect a citizen's arrest.

909
01:10:16,348 --> 01:10:19,682
I don't want to ruin a wonderful evening
by bringing you in on a misdemeanour.

910
01:10:21,020 --> 01:10:22,846
That was a joke.

911
01:10:23,981 --> 01:10:26,306
Oh.

912
01:10:40,997 --> 01:10:43,204
Oh, Joe!

913
01:10:43,291 --> 01:10:45,284
Look at the stars!

914
01:10:45,377 --> 01:10:47,535
Dozens of them.

915
01:10:49,923 --> 01:10:54,134
You know, when I was a little girl...

916
01:10:54,219 --> 01:10:57,173
I used to wish upon
a different star every night...

917
01:10:57,263 --> 01:11:00,679
for that special someone to come along.

918
01:11:00,767 --> 01:11:03,388
Someone with whom
I could share...

919
01:11:05,480 --> 01:11:07,556
everything.

920
01:11:12,111 --> 01:11:14,519
I guess that's not so unusual.

921
01:11:15,448 --> 01:11:19,030
All girls do that, don't they, Joe?

922
01:11:19,118 --> 01:11:21,739
Some guys do, too, Connie.

923
01:11:25,541 --> 01:11:27,913
- Joe?
- That's me.

924
01:11:29,503 --> 01:11:31,412
Was there ever...

925
01:11:34,174 --> 01:11:35,585
anyone else?

926
01:11:35,676 --> 01:11:37,503
Of course there was.

927
01:11:38,762 --> 01:11:40,589
Oh.

928
01:11:40,681 --> 01:11:44,512
Actually, I've only been driving
with Streebek a couple of days.

929
01:11:44,601 --> 01:11:47,851
- Before that I was with Frank.
- That's not what I meant.

930
01:12:13,546 --> 01:12:16,381
Goodness! Earthquake! It's the big one!

931
01:12:16,466 --> 01:12:18,791
Joe, help!

932
01:12:18,885 --> 01:12:20,509
Request Code 3.
Officer in distress.

933
01:12:20,595 --> 01:12:23,382
Assist officer.
I'll handle this. Calm down.

934
01:12:29,520 --> 01:12:32,272
January 9, 8:37 a.m.

935
01:12:32,356 --> 01:12:35,061
My name's Streebek.
I'm a cop.

936
01:12:35,150 --> 01:12:36,561
I overslept.

937
01:12:38,821 --> 01:12:43,483
Curiously enough, I still hadn't heard
from my anal-retentive ex-partner...

938
01:12:43,575 --> 01:12:46,825
although I was sure he'd be proud to
know I was making a concerted effort...

939
01:12:46,912 --> 01:12:49,284
to personally develop
a close relationship...

940
01:12:49,373 --> 01:12:52,742
with one of my sisters
in the Los Angeles Police Department.

941
01:13:15,315 --> 01:13:17,984
I placed a call
to the virgin Connie Swail...

942
01:13:18,067 --> 01:13:21,234
but according to the girl's mother,
she hadn't come home either.

943
01:13:21,320 --> 01:13:24,156
I don't know what to say, Mrs. Swail.

944
01:13:24,240 --> 01:13:26,861
I'm beginning to be concerned myself.

945
01:13:26,951 --> 01:13:30,901
No, Joe Friday has never
stayed out all night, either.

946
01:13:30,997 --> 01:13:34,615
The day he was born,
his mother had him home by 9:00.

947
01:13:34,709 --> 01:13:38,789
Well, let's both stay in touch
in case we hear from them.

948
01:13:38,879 --> 01:13:40,919
Thank you, Mrs. Swail.

949
01:13:44,093 --> 01:13:47,010
Oh, my goodness.
I'm gonna be late for my stake-out.

950
01:13:48,180 --> 01:13:50,173
As enchanting as Robin was...

951
01:13:50,265 --> 01:13:54,263
I still couldn't get my mind off
what happened to Joe Friday.

952
01:13:54,353 --> 01:13:56,641
For one misguided moment...

953
01:13:56,730 --> 01:14:00,063
I actually pictured my ex-partner
introducing that little cupcake...

954
01:14:00,150 --> 01:14:04,148
to the one piece of equipment that
wasn't issued to him by the department.

955
01:14:04,237 --> 01:14:08,864
But then I realized Joe would never
spring for the price of a motel room.

956
01:14:08,950 --> 01:14:12,533
And since having sex in a Yugo
was a logistical impossibility...

957
01:14:12,621 --> 01:14:15,824
I came to the conclusion
that something must be wrong.

958
01:14:15,915 --> 01:14:17,575
Who cares?

959
01:14:17,667 --> 01:14:19,541
Listen to me, Captain.

960
01:14:19,627 --> 01:14:22,712
Joe Friday was the most dedicated cop
in this city.

961
01:14:22,797 --> 01:14:25,751
Okay, so maybe all his dogs
aren't attached to one leash.

962
01:14:25,842 --> 01:14:28,463
He's thickheaded, insensitive
and reactionary.

963
01:14:28,553 --> 01:14:32,087
And generally less fun to be around
than any person I've ever met.

964
01:14:32,181 --> 01:14:35,016
Still, he was my partner.

965
01:14:35,101 --> 01:14:37,556
You want to find Joe Friday?

966
01:14:37,645 --> 01:14:41,725
My advice is to start checking out
the sanitariums.

967
01:14:43,401 --> 01:14:45,310
- Hey, Pep.
- What's shaking?

968
01:14:45,403 --> 01:14:47,775
- Hey, you!
- Me, Pep?

969
01:14:48,864 --> 01:14:51,272
Detective Streebek to you.
Let's get this mop trimmed.

970
01:14:51,367 --> 01:14:53,511
Stop shaving with a pocketknife,
and next time you eat your lunch...

971
01:14:53,535 --> 01:14:55,445
put it in your stomach,
not on your uniform.

972
01:14:55,537 --> 01:14:58,372
You're a disgrace to this department
and that badge.

973
01:15:14,389 --> 01:15:16,382
You're late, Jerry.

974
01:15:18,059 --> 01:15:22,805
I saw your announcement about my
so-called million-dollar contribution.

975
01:15:22,897 --> 01:15:24,973
Do yourself a favour, friend.

976
01:15:26,276 --> 01:15:27,818
Try the lottery.

977
01:15:27,902 --> 01:15:29,859
The lottery I can fix.

978
01:15:29,946 --> 01:15:32,235
Our problem is Mayor Parvin.

979
01:15:32,323 --> 01:15:36,570
I'm afraid he is not
"going gentle into that good night."

980
01:15:36,661 --> 01:15:38,072
Say what?

981
01:15:38,162 --> 01:15:42,207
That he is not responding
to our pressure to resign.

982
01:15:42,291 --> 01:15:44,961
We're gonna have to push him
over the edge.

983
01:15:45,044 --> 01:15:49,291
Your million-dollar contribution
will insure his presence at your party.

984
01:15:49,382 --> 01:15:54,008
Just make sure he turns into
a drug-crazed idiot, with pictures.

985
01:15:54,095 --> 01:15:56,846
Once he's politically dead,
Commissioner Kirkpatrick...

986
01:15:56,931 --> 01:15:59,303
will be a shoo-in to replace him
in the next election.

987
01:15:59,391 --> 01:16:02,843
You and I will split control
of the city.

988
01:16:02,936 --> 01:16:05,095
You will monopolize all pornography.

989
01:16:05,189 --> 01:16:08,854
Half the poor dumb sheep in Los Angeles
will be forking over money...

990
01:16:08,942 --> 01:16:10,982
to buy your sleaze...

991
01:16:11,069 --> 01:16:13,857
while the other half will be funding me
with the means to fight it.

992
01:16:15,365 --> 01:16:16,776
Reverend...

993
01:16:17,951 --> 01:16:20,524
you got balls as big as church bells.

994
01:16:22,122 --> 01:16:23,664
Thank you.

995
01:16:40,473 --> 01:16:44,222
Jonathan, I do not trust that man.

996
01:16:44,310 --> 01:16:47,228
Thank goodness he trusts me.

997
01:16:47,313 --> 01:16:49,602
That socially-retarded hedonist...

998
01:16:49,690 --> 01:16:53,142
actually believes he's going
to be alive tomorrow.

999
01:17:30,355 --> 01:17:32,015
Where's Joe Friday?

1000
01:17:45,662 --> 01:17:47,072
It's no use.

1001
01:17:47,163 --> 01:17:49,072
These knots are too tight.

1002
01:17:49,165 --> 01:17:51,738
Untie the girl.
She's coming with me.

1003
01:17:54,379 --> 01:17:58,625
You hypocrite. If you were decent,
you'd let her go and kill me instead.

1004
01:17:58,716 --> 01:18:00,127
Instead?

1005
01:18:01,511 --> 01:18:06,587
But, my dear Sergeant Friday,
I'd always planned on killing you.

1006
01:18:06,682 --> 01:18:09,352
How do you see yourself
going down in history?

1007
01:18:09,435 --> 01:18:11,760
Pagan or reverend,
devil or angel?

1008
01:18:11,854 --> 01:18:15,187
Why, both, of course.

1009
01:18:15,274 --> 01:18:17,599
One can't exist without the other.

1010
01:18:17,693 --> 01:18:20,563
Without the Jerry Caesars,
there'd be no moral outrage.

1011
01:18:20,654 --> 01:18:22,813
What's the good of moral outrage...

1012
01:18:22,906 --> 01:18:26,110
unless you have something tangible
to direct it against?

1013
01:18:26,201 --> 01:18:28,871
By this time tomorrow,
thanks to that poison gas...

1014
01:18:28,954 --> 01:18:31,659
you've been tracking
like some flu-ridden bloodhound...

1015
01:18:31,748 --> 01:18:35,663
Mr Caesar will be sitting
in that big Jacuzzi in the sky...

1016
01:18:35,752 --> 01:18:38,160
and I'll control both sides
of the equation.

1017
01:18:38,255 --> 01:18:41,671
Sure, but like every other psycho
in this city with a foolproof plan...

1018
01:18:41,758 --> 01:18:44,629
you've forgotten you're facing the
finest fighting force ever assembled.

1019
01:18:46,096 --> 01:18:47,506
The Israelis?

1020
01:18:47,597 --> 01:18:50,349
Try the decent, hardworking
men and women of Los Angeles.

1021
01:18:52,435 --> 01:18:54,724
Forgotten about them?

1022
01:18:54,813 --> 01:18:57,019
My dear Sergeant...

1023
01:18:57,106 --> 01:19:00,558
I'm absolutely counting on them.

1024
01:19:02,987 --> 01:19:04,944
Joe.

1025
01:19:05,031 --> 01:19:07,189
Joe?

1026
01:19:42,150 --> 01:19:46,480
You may have taken a wrong turn,
but there's time to straighten out.

1027
01:19:46,571 --> 01:19:48,860
You're the one that's gonna
straighten out, cop...

1028
01:19:48,949 --> 01:19:50,858
all the way down the mountain.

1029
01:19:55,288 --> 01:19:56,699
Let's go, Streebek.

1030
01:20:26,444 --> 01:20:29,017
Just relax and hold on tight.

1031
01:20:29,113 --> 01:20:32,446
Tighter!
Pretend I'm Connie. Ooh!

1032
01:20:34,285 --> 01:20:36,111
Look out! Look out!

1033
01:20:40,833 --> 01:20:43,454
There's no road here.

1034
01:20:45,671 --> 01:20:48,126
No road. Look out!

1035
01:21:00,560 --> 01:21:02,767
Look, there's the mayor.

1036
01:21:02,854 --> 01:21:05,725
Pretty clever of Whirley manoeuvring
him up here to Caesar's party.

1037
01:21:05,815 --> 01:21:08,057
He's got both people
he wants to eliminate in one place.

1038
01:21:08,151 --> 01:21:11,602
Hey, isn't that Whirley's car?

1039
01:21:11,696 --> 01:21:14,104
Good evening, Reverend.

1040
01:21:14,199 --> 01:21:16,072
Child.

1041
01:21:16,159 --> 01:21:18,531
I don't see Connie.

1042
01:21:18,620 --> 01:21:22,997
- The next car comes, follow me in.
- Wait. You can't go in there.

1043
01:21:23,082 --> 01:21:26,498
- When did you become Miss Manners?
- First, you don't have a warrant.

1044
01:21:26,586 --> 01:21:30,001
A police officer
may make an arrest without a warrant...

1045
01:21:30,089 --> 01:21:31,998
if he believes there's probable cause...

1046
01:21:32,091 --> 01:21:34,961
You're not a police officer any more.

1047
01:21:37,930 --> 01:21:40,682
I hate to be the one to break
that to you, but it's the truth.

1048
01:21:40,766 --> 01:21:43,684
You charge in there now,
you'll never get your badge back.

1049
01:21:43,769 --> 01:21:45,762
Whirley's the only one
that knows where Connie is.

1050
01:21:45,854 --> 01:21:48,208
He'll tell or I'll shove that collar
so far down his throat...

1051
01:21:48,232 --> 01:21:50,192
I'll have to take off his shoes
to wring his neck.

1052
01:21:50,234 --> 01:21:54,231
You're not thinking like a cop any more.
You're thinking like a man in love.

1053
01:21:54,321 --> 01:21:56,942
Watch your language, mister!

1054
01:21:57,908 --> 01:22:00,150
Oh, Joe, l...

1055
01:22:00,243 --> 01:22:03,328
You've never had these feelings before,
have you?

1056
01:22:04,956 --> 01:22:06,866
Almost.

1057
01:22:06,958 --> 01:22:09,200
I had a kitten once.

1058
01:22:09,294 --> 01:22:12,877
This is gonna be a little different.
Connie won't be sleeping in a box...

1059
01:22:12,964 --> 01:22:16,832
or meowing all night
or climbing up your drapes.

1060
01:22:16,926 --> 01:22:21,553
Or maybe she will. You both are sort of
starting from scratch with this thing.

1061
01:22:21,639 --> 01:22:23,217
Get out of my way!

1062
01:22:23,308 --> 01:22:27,804
Last time you went after Whirley, you
got suspended. Now you'll get arrested.

1063
01:22:27,895 --> 01:22:33,020
- On what charge, Junior?
- How about Section 146-A?

1064
01:22:34,277 --> 01:22:38,025
That's right.
Impersonating a police officer.

1065
01:22:39,490 --> 01:22:42,408
It's for your own good, Joe.

1066
01:22:42,493 --> 01:22:45,162
In spite of every logical instinct
I've ever had...

1067
01:22:45,246 --> 01:22:48,163
I consider you a real friend.

1068
01:22:51,669 --> 01:22:54,076
- Wait.
- Joe, go home.

1069
01:22:54,171 --> 01:22:56,164
There's nothing more you can do here.
Believe me.

1070
01:22:56,256 --> 01:22:59,174
By the way, my name is Pep.

1071
01:23:00,511 --> 01:23:04,259
It's not mister, junior,
bub or Streebek. It's Pep.

1072
01:23:06,350 --> 01:23:10,050
Friendships start with first names...

1073
01:23:10,145 --> 01:23:11,556
Joe.

1074
01:23:34,711 --> 01:23:37,118
Thank you so much for comin'.

1075
01:23:37,213 --> 01:23:39,751
Your Honour, pleased you could make it.

1076
01:23:39,841 --> 01:23:41,465
You, too, Reverend.

1077
01:23:41,551 --> 01:23:45,216
Let's just drop the fake civility.
Okay, Caesar?

1078
01:23:45,304 --> 01:23:49,088
- You have a cheque for the Reverend.
- I do, all in due time.

1079
01:23:50,267 --> 01:23:53,434
If it would make us all feel better...

1080
01:23:53,521 --> 01:23:56,272
why don't I hold on to it
until the formal presentation?

1081
01:23:57,942 --> 01:23:59,851
Well, whatever.

1082
01:24:07,201 --> 01:24:10,652
You're just in time. We're about
to start our cultural talent show.

1083
01:24:10,746 --> 01:24:12,655
Why don't you pull up a pew next to me?

1084
01:24:12,748 --> 01:24:16,697
Reverend, I'm sure you'll find
these gals socially redeemin'.

1085
01:24:25,594 --> 01:24:28,381
♪ Me me me me ♪

1086
01:24:28,471 --> 01:24:31,306
♪ Me me me
Me me me ♪

1087
01:24:31,391 --> 01:24:35,852
♪ Me me me me me me ♪

1088
01:24:35,937 --> 01:24:40,350
♪♪

1089
01:24:41,276 --> 01:24:45,653
♪ Oh, say can you see ♪

1090
01:24:45,738 --> 01:24:49,522
♪ By the dawn's early light ♪

1091
01:24:50,701 --> 01:24:53,572
How do you like those sweet pipes,
Reverend?

1092
01:24:53,663 --> 01:24:55,073
Surprised?

1093
01:24:55,623 --> 01:24:57,497
Oh, yes.

1094
01:24:57,583 --> 01:24:59,327
Indeed.

1095
01:24:59,418 --> 01:25:03,712
I have a feeling this evening
is going to be full of surprises.

1096
01:25:03,798 --> 01:25:06,371
♪ Through the perilous fight ♪

1097
01:26:00,311 --> 01:26:03,597
Thunderhead to Cloud 9. Do you read me?

1098
01:26:03,689 --> 01:26:06,690
Our hoses are in place.
Start the gas when ready.

1099
01:26:06,776 --> 01:26:10,275
Cloud 9 to Thunderhead.
We're startin' the gas.

1100
01:26:12,907 --> 01:26:15,658
- Hi. Just need to use the phone.
- Who the hell...

1101
01:26:15,743 --> 01:26:19,954
The White Pages, my favourite. You ever
actually reach out and touch someone?

1102
01:26:27,963 --> 01:26:30,454
See if you can get a line
on the man they work with.

1103
01:26:30,549 --> 01:26:33,918
I'll be hitting Route 30.
Keep me posted.

1104
01:26:34,803 --> 01:26:36,796
- Hello.
- L.A.P.D. Captain Gannon there?

1105
01:26:36,888 --> 01:26:39,806
- Yes, he is. It's work, dear.
- Thank you.

1106
01:26:39,891 --> 01:26:42,347
Thank you, Delilah. Hello.

1107
01:26:42,435 --> 01:26:44,271
Captain Gannon, this is Streebek.

1108
01:26:44,297 --> 01:26:46,505
- Streebek?
- I'm up at the Caesar mansion.

1109
01:26:46,564 --> 01:26:51,143
I'm surrounded by Pagans. Call out
S.W.A.T. They've got a small army here.

1110
01:27:28,772 --> 01:27:32,640
- Reverend?
- I'll be leaving you in charge, Emil.

1111
01:27:32,735 --> 01:27:35,272
I'll be joining a special passenger...

1112
01:27:35,362 --> 01:27:39,027
aboard my jet for a few
restful days in Acapulco.

1113
01:27:39,116 --> 01:27:41,654
Don't forget to leave a Pagan card...

1114
01:27:41,743 --> 01:27:43,985
so the police and Mr Caesar's
next of kin...

1115
01:27:44,079 --> 01:27:47,993
will give us proper credit
for returning his magazines.

1116
01:27:48,083 --> 01:27:50,788
Oh, and, Emil...

1117
01:27:50,877 --> 01:27:52,870
ever forward.

1118
01:28:21,407 --> 01:28:24,194
Police officers! Clear the road.

1119
01:28:32,668 --> 01:28:34,495
"Police officers.

1120
01:28:34,587 --> 01:28:36,496
Clear the road."

1121
01:29:01,154 --> 01:29:03,443
- Move it!
- Go! Go! Go! Go!

1122
01:29:09,079 --> 01:29:14,120
What the... Cops! Break out the weapons!
Break out the masks!

1123
01:29:55,249 --> 01:29:57,158
We're pinned down.
Hold your positions!

1124
01:30:11,765 --> 01:30:14,256
All right, boys, let's do it!

1125
01:31:04,775 --> 01:31:06,732
Thank God, it's Friday!

1126
01:31:08,904 --> 01:31:12,023
Hey, everybody, it's me, Pep.
Good to see ya!

1127
01:31:26,087 --> 01:31:28,127
So long, hotshot.

1128
01:31:28,214 --> 01:31:32,876
Muzz, you weren't even born
with the sense God gave the common dog.

1129
01:31:32,969 --> 01:31:34,926
Don't you realize that's my partner?

1130
01:31:35,013 --> 01:31:37,052
Ha-ha!

1131
01:31:44,689 --> 01:31:45,934
Thanks, partner.

1132
01:31:46,023 --> 01:31:49,606
Read him his rights, Pep.

1133
01:31:49,694 --> 01:31:51,104
"Pep"?

1134
01:31:52,405 --> 01:31:54,444
You hear that, Emil?
He called me Pep.

1135
01:31:54,532 --> 01:31:56,773
You have the right to remain silent.

1136
01:31:56,867 --> 01:31:58,907
If you give up the right
to remain silent...

1137
01:31:58,994 --> 01:32:01,201
You know these words.
Come on. Sing along.

1138
01:32:01,288 --> 01:32:04,574
♪ Anything you say can be used
against you in a court of law ♪

1139
01:32:06,126 --> 01:32:11,796
You got a lifetime subscription
to Bait, Dollies and Field and Cream.

1140
01:32:11,882 --> 01:32:14,587
You saved my house, my gals, my life.

1141
01:32:14,676 --> 01:32:17,594
I'll give you anything you want.
Money, broads, automobiles.

1142
01:32:17,679 --> 01:32:19,636
Anything! Just name it.

1143
01:32:19,723 --> 01:32:21,929
How 'bout takin'
your hands off my suit?

1144
01:32:22,017 --> 01:32:23,297
Absolutely.

1145
01:32:23,393 --> 01:32:25,551
Joe, Jerry, Dona! Ava!

1146
01:32:25,645 --> 01:32:28,136
Whirley's headed to Mexico
in his private jet.

1147
01:32:28,231 --> 01:32:30,639
He's got Connie. Let's move it.

1148
01:32:30,734 --> 01:32:32,857
- Who's Connie?
- I don't know.

1149
01:32:32,944 --> 01:32:34,604
- Wasn't she...
- Never mind. You hungry?

1150
01:32:34,696 --> 01:32:36,605
- Yeah.
- Let's eat.

1151
01:32:38,074 --> 01:32:39,983
Friday, Streebek, good work.

1152
01:32:40,076 --> 01:32:42,401
I'll expect a full report.

1153
01:32:42,495 --> 01:32:45,282
Sure thing. If you'll excuse us,
we have a fugitive to apprehend.

1154
01:32:45,373 --> 01:32:50,498
Wait a minute. I can't let you take
a civilian with you on a hot pursuit.

1155
01:32:50,586 --> 01:32:53,671
- But, Captain, please.
- Sorry, Joe.

1156
01:32:58,219 --> 01:33:00,757
You're gonna need this.

1157
01:33:00,846 --> 01:33:05,508
♪♪

1158
01:33:07,269 --> 01:33:09,428
I didn't have the heart to turn it in.

1159
01:33:11,440 --> 01:33:14,357
Yes, sir.

1160
01:33:16,195 --> 01:33:20,607
Don't just stand there, you petrified
monolith of legal propriety!

1161
01:33:20,699 --> 01:33:23,190
Let's move! I'll drive.

1162
01:33:23,285 --> 01:33:26,120
You seem to be suffering
from selective amnesia.

1163
01:33:26,204 --> 01:33:29,122
I outrank you. I'll drive.

1164
01:33:55,149 --> 01:33:57,687
Be careful. This is a dangerous road.

1165
01:33:57,777 --> 01:34:01,228
When are you worried about my driving,
Mr I-Like-Life-In-The-Fast-Lane?

1166
01:34:05,493 --> 01:34:09,075
- You just flew through a stop sign!
- It felt good.

1167
01:34:11,165 --> 01:34:13,323
Look out for that bump!

1168
01:34:18,005 --> 01:34:21,670
Don't you remember those films
they showed us in high school?

1169
01:34:21,759 --> 01:34:26,052
- Red Asphalt. Blood on the Highway.
- You picked two of my favourites.

1170
01:34:44,030 --> 01:34:45,572
Jonathan.

1171
01:34:46,825 --> 01:34:50,953
I just heard on the police radio
they've stormed the mansion.

1172
01:34:51,037 --> 01:34:55,117
They know everything. It's all over.
We're finished.

1173
01:34:55,208 --> 01:34:58,908
Oh. The girl's aboard, of course?

1174
01:34:59,003 --> 01:35:01,764
Yes, but we might as well let her go.
There's no point in keeping her.

1175
01:35:01,839 --> 01:35:04,128
You're absolutely right.

1176
01:35:04,217 --> 01:35:06,790
Watch for the police.
I'll untie her.

1177
01:35:06,886 --> 01:35:08,464
Be calm.

1178
01:35:08,554 --> 01:35:10,796
Calm. Police.

1179
01:35:19,732 --> 01:35:20,977
Jonathan?

1180
01:35:24,111 --> 01:35:26,649
All buckled up? Good.

1181
01:35:26,739 --> 01:35:28,149
You freak!

1182
01:35:29,241 --> 01:35:33,239
- Ah! Freak.
- Don't worry, my dear.

1183
01:35:33,328 --> 01:35:35,487
You'll get used to me in time.

1184
01:35:36,415 --> 01:35:38,324
Jonathan, I think maybe...

1185
01:35:39,751 --> 01:35:41,246
Oh, my God!

1186
01:35:43,588 --> 01:35:45,498
Jonathan!

1187
01:35:49,302 --> 01:35:52,256
Oh, my God! Jonathan!

1188
01:35:57,102 --> 01:35:59,141
Jonathan!

1189
01:36:06,903 --> 01:36:09,192
Come on, Joe. Slow down!

1190
01:36:09,280 --> 01:36:12,400
What happened to those regulations
on high-speed pursuits?

1191
01:36:12,492 --> 01:36:15,695
- I thought you were safety-conscious.
- Close your eyes and think of Christmas.

1192
01:36:18,581 --> 01:36:20,324
Think of Christmas?

1193
01:36:26,756 --> 01:36:30,006
♪ Good King Wenceslaus looked out
on the feast of Stephen ♪

1194
01:36:30,092 --> 01:36:33,675
- ♪ And the snow lay round about ♪
- ♪ Deep and crisp and even ♪

1195
01:36:33,762 --> 01:36:37,712
♪ Brightly shone the moon that night
though the frost was cruel ♪

1196
01:36:37,808 --> 01:36:39,386
♪ When the poor man came in sight... ♪

1197
01:36:39,476 --> 01:36:41,184
Try "Silent Night."

1198
01:36:53,907 --> 01:36:56,908
- He's gone. Let's go home.
- No, the runway.

1199
01:37:21,851 --> 01:37:23,429
We lost them.

1200
01:37:23,519 --> 01:37:25,726
I have eyes.

1201
01:37:37,867 --> 01:37:39,776
Streebek was right.

1202
01:37:41,245 --> 01:37:43,154
We had lost them.

1203
01:39:59,296 --> 01:40:01,123
Hi, Connie.

1204
01:40:01,215 --> 01:40:04,085
Oh, Joe! I'm so proud.

1205
01:40:08,931 --> 01:40:14,269
What a collar, Joe!
I'm so happy for us. Connie.

1206
01:40:14,353 --> 01:40:18,564
Streebek, isn't there anything
job-related you should be doing now?

1207
01:40:18,649 --> 01:40:20,059
No, nothing.

1208
01:40:23,403 --> 01:40:26,772
I could return our rent-a-wreck...

1209
01:40:26,865 --> 01:40:28,941
and maybe file a report.

1210
01:40:32,037 --> 01:40:33,661
Good...

1211
01:40:33,747 --> 01:40:36,238
because I have a whole lifetime
to catch up on.

1212
01:40:57,937 --> 01:41:02,515
On February 21, a trial was held in Superior Court...

1213
01:41:02,608 --> 01:41:04,897
in and for the County of Los Angeles.

1214
01:41:04,985 --> 01:41:07,655
The Reverend Jonathan Whirley
was found guilty...

1215
01:41:07,738 --> 01:41:09,814
on two counts of attempted murder...

1216
01:41:09,907 --> 01:41:12,991
kidnapping, arson,
obstruction of justice...

1217
01:41:13,077 --> 01:41:15,449
and tampering
with public utilities.

1218
01:41:15,537 --> 01:41:18,408
He is presently in the men's
correction facility at Chino...

1219
01:41:18,499 --> 01:41:22,282
serving 43 consecutive
99-year sentences...

1220
01:41:22,377 --> 01:41:26,126
which makes him eligible for parole
in seven years.

1221
01:41:27,382 --> 01:41:31,083
Monday, January 12, 8:43 a.m.

1222
01:41:31,178 --> 01:41:34,760
As for Streebek and me, we're back
on day watch at Robbery-Homicide...

1223
01:41:34,848 --> 01:41:38,513
where he still exhibits a blatant
disregard for departmental procedure.

1224
01:41:38,602 --> 01:41:42,730
But I am somehow managing to keep this
in its proper perspective.

1225
01:41:53,658 --> 01:41:56,528
Goodbye, Pep.
Will you be coming over later?

1226
01:41:56,619 --> 01:42:00,368
Yeah, I have to.
I'm wearing your underwear.

1227
01:42:10,966 --> 01:42:13,006
Late night last night, partner?

1228
01:42:13,094 --> 01:42:15,845
I thought the Christian Science
Reading Room closed at 10:00?

1229
01:42:15,930 --> 01:42:19,180
Not that it's any of your business,
Mr National Enquirer...

1230
01:42:19,266 --> 01:42:22,552
but I had the pleasure of spending the
evening in the company of Connie Swail.

1231
01:42:22,644 --> 01:42:24,886
Wait a minute. Connie Swail?

1232
01:42:24,980 --> 01:42:27,388
Don't you mean
the virgin Connie Swail?

1233
01:42:28,984 --> 01:42:34,903
♪♪

1234
01:42:46,501 --> 01:42:48,790
This is the city.
It's a city of crime.

1235
01:42:48,878 --> 01:42:51,120
My name is Friday.
I carry a badge.

1236
01:42:51,214 --> 01:42:53,752
3:15 a.m., Thursday, January 15.

1237
01:42:53,842 --> 01:42:56,048
It was chilly that morning
in the City of Angels.

1238
01:42:56,136 --> 01:42:59,836
On this occasion, we witnessed
a Pagan ritual in progress.

1239
01:43:02,642 --> 01:43:05,097
♪ See that, Streebek
We're just in time ♪

1240
01:43:05,186 --> 01:43:07,179
♪ We have stumbled
into a major crime ♪

1241
01:43:07,271 --> 01:43:09,845
♪ They got the girl all frightened
Now that's not nice ♪

1242
01:43:09,941 --> 01:43:12,514
♪ I think she is the subject
of a sacrifice ♪

1243
01:43:12,610 --> 01:43:14,899
♪ Buddy, we're puttin'
this party on ice ♪

1244
01:43:14,987 --> 01:43:17,443
♪ But first you know we really
oughta read 'em their rights ♪

1245
01:43:17,531 --> 01:43:19,607
♪ Read 'em their rights
Read 'em their rights ♪

1246
01:43:22,077 --> 01:43:24,651
♪ Well, I'm here tonight
to rap about your rights ♪

1247
01:43:24,747 --> 01:43:26,656
♪ 'Cause right now you're in trouble ♪

1248
01:43:26,749 --> 01:43:29,500
♪ Don't have to say nothin' at all
You all got two calls ♪

1249
01:43:29,585 --> 01:43:31,542
♪ And you better make 'em
on the double ♪

1250
01:43:35,716 --> 01:43:39,001
♪ This is the city of crime ♪

1251
01:43:40,846 --> 01:43:43,134
♪ Don't step outta line ♪

1252
01:43:45,642 --> 01:43:49,307
♪ This is the city of crime ♪

1253
01:43:49,396 --> 01:43:52,978
♪ You better be clean

1254
01:43:54,359 --> 01:43:56,850
♪ You're a dangerous mob
And it is our job ♪

1255
01:43:56,945 --> 01:43:59,234
♪ To bust you all
for being violent ♪

1256
01:43:59,322 --> 01:44:01,647
♪ While we are here
let's state it clear ♪

1257
01:44:01,741 --> 01:44:04,113
♪ You have the right to remain silent ♪

1258
01:44:04,202 --> 01:44:06,657
♪ Well, excuse me, Copper
Mr Crime-Stopper ♪

1259
01:44:06,746 --> 01:44:09,071
♪ What is wrong
with what we're doin' ♪

1260
01:44:09,165 --> 01:44:11,703
♪ We just like to dance
in our goatskin pants ♪

1261
01:44:11,793 --> 01:44:13,702
♪ Around this ancient ruin ♪

1262
01:44:13,795 --> 01:44:16,368
♪ Now it's not so funny
that it cost big money ♪

1263
01:44:16,464 --> 01:44:19,002
♪ If you ever have to hire a lawyer ♪

1264
01:44:19,091 --> 01:44:21,582
♪ It's my duty to inform you
and my pleasure to warn you ♪

1265
01:44:21,677 --> 01:44:24,049
♪ We'll provide one for ya ♪
Huh!

1266
01:44:27,767 --> 01:44:31,218
♪ This is the city of crime ♪

1267
01:44:32,646 --> 01:44:35,184
♪ Don't step outta line ♪

1268
01:44:37,610 --> 01:44:42,106
♪ This is the city of crime ♪

1269
01:44:42,197 --> 01:44:46,361
♪ You're lookin' at 7 to 9 ♪

1270
01:44:46,451 --> 01:44:48,732
♪ Now you know what you've been doing
is a serious crime ♪

1271
01:44:48,787 --> 01:44:51,408
♪ And you'll probably be doin'
some serious time ♪

1272
01:44:51,498 --> 01:44:53,935
♪ In case you might be worried
about the friends you'll lose ♪

1273
01:44:53,959 --> 01:44:56,201
♪ At least they get to see you
on the evening news ♪

1274
01:44:56,294 --> 01:44:58,620
- ♪ It's a new sensation ♪
- ♪ We go down to the station ♪

1275
01:44:58,713 --> 01:45:01,798
- ♪ You're gonna answer some questions ♪
- ♪ And have some refreshments ♪

1276
01:45:01,883 --> 01:45:03,543
What is your full name?

1277
01:45:03,635 --> 01:45:06,042
♪ Well, excuse me
Excuse me ♪

1278
01:45:06,137 --> 01:45:08,545
♪ Don't use, abuse or refuse me ♪

1279
01:45:08,640 --> 01:45:11,012
♪ It's no joke
I'm broke ♪

1280
01:45:11,101 --> 01:45:13,508
♪ But my rights I can and will invoke ♪

1281
01:45:13,603 --> 01:45:15,809
♪ I'm homely and I'm lonely ♪

1282
01:45:15,897 --> 01:45:18,388
♪ But the state cannot disown me ♪

1283
01:45:18,483 --> 01:45:21,056
♪ It ain't funny
I might want money ♪

1284
01:45:21,152 --> 01:45:23,228
♪ To take home to my honey ♪

1285
01:45:27,158 --> 01:45:30,408
♪ This is the city of crime ♪

1286
01:45:32,163 --> 01:45:34,701
♪ Don't step outta line ♪

1287
01:45:37,084 --> 01:45:40,868
♪ This is the city of crime ♪

1288
01:45:40,963 --> 01:45:44,462
♪ Where an honest man is hard to find ♪♪