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Subtitles by explosiveskull
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Hello? Hello, Glenn.
It's Ali Davis.
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Yes, baby! I'm excited, too.
But wait, what?
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Yes, I know Sports Illustrated
wants Serena for June,
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but before we talk about that client,
we need to talk about Lisa Leslie,
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who will be front and center
at the shoot.
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What? Oh, oh, no.
No, this ain't a negotiation.
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It's center position or tall-ass
girl ain't showing up for the shoot!
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Big news in basketball.
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College sensation Jamal Barry
declared himself eligible
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- for the NBA draft.
- What? Excuse me,
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- I am her agent.
- He has not yet signed with an agent.
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Oh, no, no.
Glenn, don't go there with me.
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What'd you say? Oh, no, no.
No, no, no.
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Oh, you. No. No, no, no, no.
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No, no, no.
Glenn, no, you listen!
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Unless Lisa is guaranteed
center position in writing,
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you'd better learn
how to Photoshop
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because you ain't gonna have
any of my clients
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in your magazine ever again!
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You know what? Goodbye.
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I'm not dealing
with stupid people today.
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- Good morning?
- Good morning.
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Oh, he's calling back!
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You know what? Can you deal
with the slow people today?
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I can't.
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Hey, Glenn,
let me see if I can get her.
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You know what? She just stepped out.
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I'll have her return.
Buh-bye.
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How long have you been up?
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Ooh, since 3:00 a.m.,
and I've been crushing it all morning,
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talking to Nike and Puma.
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But I've decided I'm going
to take Candace to Adidas,
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because they stepped up.
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- You're dinging.
- Oh, no, stop it.
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Please stop. Here, stop it!
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Go away!
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Mari created this
Lovefinders.com profile for me.
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Can you please get rid of it?
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All these stupid alerts
keep coming up.
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- I will have it taken down ASAP.
- Mm-hmm.
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If that's definitely
what you want?
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That is definitely what I want.
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Okay. It's just...
It's been a minute.
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Uh, how would you know?
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- Well, I keep your calendar.
- Booty calls aren't in there.
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Just please do
what I ask you to do.
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Thank you. Ooh, I got to go.
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Dry cleaning is here,
and I really feel like
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the black skirt,
houndstooth jacket screams,
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"Damn right you're making me partner!
Took you bitches long enough."
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You know what, Brandon?
Just because you're gay,
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doesn't mean you're fabulous,
okurrr?
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- Okurr.
- It's "okurrr."
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I... I can't even...
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Come on, honey, walk like you
are an assistant to a partner.
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- Mm-hmm.
- Let's go.
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Holy Mother of Men's Health and
Fitness, what is happening here?
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Oh, that's my new neighbor.
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Captain Fucktastic, that's what
I've been calling him. Right?
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Yeah.
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- Hi.
- Hi. Hi.
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Such a nice day for a jog.
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I like running.
I just don't like running alone.
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He's gay.
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Anyone seen the new Gaga video?
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No, he's not.
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God.
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Not even a sideways eye fuck.
Nada.
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What's going on in his head?
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What, my ass doesn't look good
in this skirt?
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Oh, given
the current climate,
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it feels inappropriate
for me to comment on your body.
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- Brandon!
- Tight as a snare drum.
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You could bounce a quarter
off that thing.
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You know what? Screw him.
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- Today's my day. I'm making partner, baby.
- Mm-hmm!
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And no man,
I don't care how fucktastic,
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is gonna kill my vibe.
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It's Mari,
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she says she wants you
to bring champagne
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to the bachelorette party
'cause Olivia's always sucks.
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Okay, Bridezilla, take a Xanax.
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So, seeing as how today's
the big day and all,
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I was wondering if,
once you get bumped up to partner,
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you might...
see any changes in store for me?
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Look,
you make a great assistant,
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but you'd be a shitty agent.
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And I say that
with love.
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I know, right? Totally.
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Luckily, I'm blissfully happy
just being your assistant...
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Good.
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...in perpetuity.
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Ooh, hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo.
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Check out
the sweet new wheels.
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A pre-celebration
for the big day, huh?
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No, Ethan. Just...
another day at the office.
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- Rolling calls, crushing balls.
- Good morning, Ms. Davis.
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Ah, ladies first. Thank you.
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I mean, this should've
happened years ago.
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It's crazy that I'm a
partner and you're not
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just 'cause I signed Matt Ryan.
I mean, come on!
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I mean, in fairness to me,
monster signing, but still...
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Yeah, you're right, Ethan.
It is crazy.
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That's what I said.
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Well, I'm rooting for you.
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- Fingers crossed, right?
- Thanks, Ethan.
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I can't.
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Ali Davis's office. Hi, Mari.
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Mari says she knows you're here.
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She has a quick
bachelorette party question.
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Tell her I'm all good
for tomorrow night.
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Text me any specifics.
But be supportive, you know.
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Make it sound like I wish
I had time to shoot the shit.
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Hey, girl. Ali can't wait to get it.
It's gonna be a partay.
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Hey, hey, pop quiz!
What is being kicked today?
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- A world of ass!
- Boom!
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- Sorry.
- Staff meeting in five.
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I swear to God, bro,
don't fuck with me!
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Fuck you, bro! I'll rip out
your eyes and fuck the sockets!
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I'll fuck your mom!
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Ad agency exec?
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Oh, no, it's my brother.
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Yeah, we're doing that whole
fantasy football prep.
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Anyway, want a doughnut?
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Sure. Thanks.
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Hey. It's always good
to see you guys.
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It always brightens my day.
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Oh, thanks, Danny.
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You said you were gonna
fuck your brother's ma?
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- Our mom, yeah.
- Uh-huh. Okay.
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So, we're laying in bed
and she says,
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"Do you even know my name?"
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- No clue, right? None.
- I have no clue.
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So, I pretend to be
all appalled by this.
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I run off to the bathroom,
I sneak to the kitchen,
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I start looking
through her mail,
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I find
a Bed Bath & Beyond coupon.
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I'm buck naked, mind you.
She comes in, I go,
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"Oh, good morning,
uh, Resident."
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And knowing you, Kevin,
you kept the coupon.
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You know I did.
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Story gets better,
I'll finish it later.
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Oh, come on, Ali can handle
locker-room talk. Right, bro?
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Yeah, I'm sure you'll get the
X-rated version at poker night.
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Why do you keep on this?
There's no poker night.
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If there was a poker night,
we would invite you
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'cause I'd like
to take your money.
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- Really?
- No poker night.
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None, nada, zip!
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Ooh, I'ma need you to calm down,
baby man child.
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Mm.
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Looking like Bamm-Bamm.
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Boom! Seize the day, right?
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That's why we're here.
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We seize the day here at Summit!
That's right!
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That's right! Good to see you!
How you doing?
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You keep telling yourself that.
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All right. Gentlemen...
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Headline news:
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Jamal Barry will be the
number-one pick in the NBA draft,
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and he's meeting
with agents.
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Now, I love Jamal.
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Not only because
he's a big-time player,
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but he's a franchise maker.
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But Jamal does come
with some baggage.
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Dear old dad.
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Guy legally
changed his name to Joe Dolla,
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which he's also calling his line
of nutritional supplements.
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So, now you know what we're up against.
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So, here's what we need.
We need to let him know
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that he'll have
the entire team around him.
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Because our teamwork
makes their dream work!
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- Whoo!
- That's right! All right!
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Now, speaking...
speaking of teamwork,
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I think we got ourselves...
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a championship ball.
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Right?
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And I think you know
what this means.
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That means somebody in this room
is about to be knighted.
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Now, that could be you.
Uh-huh.
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It could be you.
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You had a good year.
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But anyway,
before I name names...
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I got to say something
about this person.
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This person...
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is tough as nails,
plays with passion and grit.
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This person...
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has brass balls
when it comes to negotiations.
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Now, it's my honor
to confer title of partner
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to the person synonymous with
Summit Worldwide Management.
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Let's give it up for the newest
member of the partners club!
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Here you go! Eddie Allen!
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- Ali?
- Whoo!
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That's a great interception,
Ali, but that pass was to Eddie.
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- Yeah, he said "Eddie."
- Eddie, that's right.
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Pass that ball to Eddie. Eddie!
Eddie Allen, our new partner!
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Way to go, Eddie! Good job.
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- Great year!
- Yeah!
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- Eddie Allen, boys!
- Whoo!
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- That's our new partner!
- All right!
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Hand him the ball.
That's right. Give it up.
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00:09:49,967 --> 00:09:52,532
You want to hand the ball
to Eddie.
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00:09:52,534 --> 00:09:54,965
That's right. Hand the ball over.
That's right, there you are.
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00:09:54,967 --> 00:09:57,866
- Eddie Allen! Congratulations to Eddie!
- Yeah! Whoo!
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00:09:57,868 --> 00:10:00,200
That's teamwork right there!
Teamwork!
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00:10:15,004 --> 00:10:17,468
Is this a joke, Nick? Huh?
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00:10:17,470 --> 00:10:19,936
I mean, what the fuck do I
have to do to make partner?
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Breathe. Grab a Fiji.
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00:10:21,403 --> 00:10:22,935
I mean, you know the deal.
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00:10:22,937 --> 00:10:24,602
It has to be
unanimous partner approval.
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00:10:24,604 --> 00:10:27,269
Okay. So who was it?
It was Kevin, wasn't it?
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00:10:27,271 --> 00:10:28,735
I knew it was Kevin.
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00:10:28,737 --> 00:10:31,068
It's anonymous,
so I honestly couldn't tell you.
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00:10:31,070 --> 00:10:35,035
This is bullshit. This is boys-club
bullshit, and you know it!
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00:10:35,037 --> 00:10:37,403
Look, this is a meritocracy.
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00:10:37,405 --> 00:10:39,702
So, you're not entitled
to be a partner.
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00:10:39,704 --> 00:10:41,836
I'm sorry, "entitled"?
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00:10:41,838 --> 00:10:45,869
Oh, well, you name someone who reps
more Olympic gold medalists than me.
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00:10:45,871 --> 00:10:49,137
I have clients on the cover
of Sports Illustrated and Vogue
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in the same month!
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00:10:50,739 --> 00:10:52,771
But you don't have any of
the big three clients, do you?
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00:10:52,773 --> 00:10:55,405
The MLB, the NBA, the NFL.
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I mean,
Eddie signed Mitchell Trubisky.
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That's a number-one draft pick.
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Boom. Done.
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00:11:01,974 --> 00:11:03,205
- Boom!
- Yeah.
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00:11:03,207 --> 00:11:05,539
- Okay.
- Ali. Ali!
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00:11:05,541 --> 00:11:08,072
Look.
So I'm gonna be honest with you.
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00:11:09,174 --> 00:11:11,171
You don't connect well with men.
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00:11:12,074 --> 00:11:14,471
That means you're doing great
in your lane.
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00:11:14,473 --> 00:11:18,105
So, let's just stay
in your lane.
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00:11:19,308 --> 00:11:22,506
- Okay?
- Okay. Are you finished?
234
00:11:23,241 --> 00:11:24,707
- Yeah, I'm good.
- Great.
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00:11:24,709 --> 00:11:27,374
I have to go get back
in my female lane.
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00:11:28,341 --> 00:11:31,041
Have a great day, dick...
I mean, Nick.
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00:11:31,043 --> 00:11:31,940
What'd I say?
238
00:11:38,042 --> 00:11:39,639
Listen up, assholes!
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00:11:40,477 --> 00:11:43,842
I am personally going to sign
Jamal Barry.
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00:11:43,844 --> 00:11:45,908
- Uhh.
- This is fair warning.
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00:11:45,910 --> 00:11:49,441
Buckle up, backstabbing bitches.
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00:11:59,211 --> 00:12:00,544
Hey, Ali, how you doing?
243
00:12:00,546 --> 00:12:02,409
Fan-fucking-tastic.
Couldn't be better!
244
00:12:02,411 --> 00:12:03,909
Hey, Skip!
Your daughter's here.
245
00:12:03,911 --> 00:12:05,207
Hey, Dad!
246
00:12:05,209 --> 00:12:06,609
- Hey, you're early.
- Yeah.
247
00:12:06,611 --> 00:12:07,509
Break.
248
00:12:09,077 --> 00:12:11,643
Doesn't look like you're headed
for a celebratory dinner.
249
00:12:11,645 --> 00:12:16,443
No, because they made
a 31-year-old suck-up partner.
250
00:12:16,445 --> 00:12:18,209
But I'm good, Daddy.
You know why?
251
00:12:18,211 --> 00:12:21,577
Because I go high
when they go low.
252
00:12:21,579 --> 00:12:24,376
- You want to talk about it?
- Yes, I want to talk!
253
00:12:24,378 --> 00:12:26,644
Let me just get
these hand wraps...
254
00:12:26,646 --> 00:12:31,277
These hand wraps are...
Gets me so...
255
00:12:32,246 --> 00:12:35,543
I work harder than all of 'em.
I do my job better.
256
00:12:35,545 --> 00:12:37,411
And they're still trying
to hold me down.
257
00:12:37,413 --> 00:12:40,277
They hit you,
you hit back even harder.
258
00:12:40,679 --> 00:12:42,344
You got you.
259
00:12:42,346 --> 00:12:44,777
You hear me? You got you.
260
00:12:44,779 --> 00:12:47,611
How am I supposed to fight a system
that's rigged against me, Daddy, huh?
261
00:12:47,613 --> 00:12:48,911
Tell me that!
262
00:12:48,913 --> 00:12:52,445
You deliver on your word.
You sign Jamal Barry.
263
00:12:52,447 --> 00:12:54,412
Then you're undeniable.
264
00:12:55,947 --> 00:12:57,813
You're right. You're right!
265
00:12:57,815 --> 00:12:59,012
Just shake the shit off.
266
00:12:59,549 --> 00:13:02,279
I got me. I got me.
267
00:13:03,147 --> 00:13:04,312
Come on.
268
00:13:05,183 --> 00:13:06,514
And soon...
269
00:13:07,315 --> 00:13:09,680
I'm gonna sign Jamal Barry.
270
00:13:09,682 --> 00:13:12,714
That's it,
that's it, that's it. Yeah.
271
00:13:14,016 --> 00:13:16,747
Yes! Break.
272
00:13:17,517 --> 00:13:19,580
- Good talk, good talk.
- Thanks, Daddy.
273
00:13:19,582 --> 00:13:22,615
- Oh! Ho-ho-ho!
- I didn't hear the bell.
274
00:13:22,617 --> 00:13:25,347
That's my girl. That's my girl.
275
00:13:25,349 --> 00:13:26,646
I love you.
276
00:13:27,083 --> 00:13:31,816
I can't believe I leased
that stupid expensive Porsche.
277
00:13:31,818 --> 00:13:35,281
I just knew
I was gonna get it this time.
278
00:13:36,019 --> 00:13:37,716
Fake it till you make it, girl.
279
00:13:40,351 --> 00:13:42,216
Who is that new bartender?
280
00:13:43,586 --> 00:13:45,883
Oh, that's Will.
He's been here a couple of months.
281
00:13:49,820 --> 00:13:52,918
Uh, you know what, Dad? I think I'm
gonna stay and have another drink.
282
00:13:52,920 --> 00:13:54,318
Uh-huh.
283
00:13:54,320 --> 00:13:55,919
- I got the bill, don't worry.
- Yeah, yeah.
284
00:13:55,921 --> 00:13:59,285
- Thank you for my pep talk.
- Oh, you're welcome.
285
00:14:02,486 --> 00:14:04,685
Don't look at me like that.
286
00:14:23,219 --> 00:14:24,317
Hi.
287
00:14:24,954 --> 00:14:25,952
Hi.
288
00:14:25,954 --> 00:14:27,717
So, what you mixing?
289
00:14:27,719 --> 00:14:30,784
How about a bespoke cocktail
tailored specifically for you?
290
00:14:30,786 --> 00:14:33,252
- For me?
- Let me just get a look at you.
291
00:14:34,520 --> 00:14:36,552
No, don't laugh.
Wait a minute.
292
00:14:36,554 --> 00:14:38,185
All right,
now turn this way.
293
00:14:38,187 --> 00:14:39,753
Turn the other way.
294
00:14:41,254 --> 00:14:43,286
Okay. I got you.
295
00:14:43,288 --> 00:14:44,818
Okay.
296
00:14:46,254 --> 00:14:49,152
Oh, oh, no, no, no,
I'm not a vodka girl.
297
00:14:49,154 --> 00:14:51,920
I really like whiskey.
I like dark.
298
00:14:51,922 --> 00:14:53,821
- Oh, do you?
- Mm-hmm.
299
00:14:53,823 --> 00:14:55,886
Would you go to a symphony,
hop up on stage
300
00:14:55,888 --> 00:14:58,221
and tell the conductor
he needs more cello?
301
00:14:58,223 --> 00:15:01,488
- Probably, but go ahead.
- Uh-huh.
302
00:15:06,323 --> 00:15:08,586
Okay. All right.
303
00:15:10,023 --> 00:15:12,422
I call this "The All You."
304
00:15:13,890 --> 00:15:15,021
All me.
305
00:15:15,023 --> 00:15:16,854
- All you.
- Mm-hmm.
306
00:15:20,723 --> 00:15:21,756
Mmm.
307
00:15:22,157 --> 00:15:23,523
Mmm.
308
00:15:23,525 --> 00:15:26,321
This is really good.
Do I taste rose?
309
00:15:26,323 --> 00:15:29,456
You do. It's the cardamom rose syrup.
I make it myself.
310
00:15:29,458 --> 00:15:33,555
And it pairs perfectly with the Cîroc
you tried to get me to stop pouring.
311
00:15:37,393 --> 00:15:39,790
Um... Would you like to try it?
312
00:15:39,792 --> 00:15:42,891
I mean, if you don't mind
sharing my straw.
313
00:15:48,060 --> 00:15:49,058
Uh...
314
00:16:05,595 --> 00:16:07,760
Yeah.
315
00:16:08,528 --> 00:16:11,260
Where'd you say
your bedroom was? Huh?
316
00:16:11,262 --> 00:16:12,794
Oh! Over there?
317
00:16:12,796 --> 00:16:16,026
It's, uh...
somewhere back there.
318
00:16:16,028 --> 00:16:17,327
Go find it.
319
00:16:17,329 --> 00:16:19,694
Ooh, girl,
what I'm about to do to you!
320
00:16:19,696 --> 00:16:21,793
Yeah, show me, papi!
321
00:16:21,795 --> 00:16:23,060
Oh, yeah.
322
00:16:24,362 --> 00:16:26,029
- To the left.
- Wait.
323
00:16:26,031 --> 00:16:27,960
To the left. To the right, to the right!
324
00:16:27,962 --> 00:16:30,394
- Wait, hold...
- To the left!
325
00:16:30,396 --> 00:16:31,729
Ah! Can we talk about...
326
00:16:31,731 --> 00:16:34,527
- Oh!
- Ow! Ah, ah!
327
00:16:34,529 --> 00:16:36,995
Hold on! Ah...
328
00:16:37,395 --> 00:16:38,992
Uh!
329
00:16:39,930 --> 00:16:42,327
Uh... Okay.
330
00:16:42,329 --> 00:16:43,861
- Uh...
- Ooh.
331
00:16:48,530 --> 00:16:49,661
Oh!
332
00:16:49,663 --> 00:16:51,495
Oh, that's it!
Oh, my God!
333
00:16:51,497 --> 00:16:53,761
Oh, my God!
Oh, my God!
334
00:16:53,763 --> 00:16:55,461
I can't breathe!
I can't breathe!
335
00:16:58,030 --> 00:17:00,462
Whoa! Ah! Ah!
336
00:17:00,464 --> 00:17:03,728
Ooh! Ooh, ooh.
337
00:17:03,730 --> 00:17:05,629
That was great.
338
00:17:12,164 --> 00:17:13,296
Yeah.
339
00:17:39,567 --> 00:17:41,365
- Who are you?
- I'm Ben.
340
00:17:41,367 --> 00:17:43,831
I hope it's okay
I borrowed your mask.
341
00:17:44,633 --> 00:17:47,098
Welcome to Wakanda.
342
00:17:50,099 --> 00:17:51,098
What?
343
00:17:51,100 --> 00:17:52,031
Hey, Ben.
344
00:17:52,469 --> 00:17:54,401
Ben. Ben! Oh, uh.
345
00:17:54,403 --> 00:17:56,066
Hey. Hey, buddy.
346
00:17:56,068 --> 00:17:57,900
I thought Brody's dad
was dropping you off at 10:00.
347
00:17:57,902 --> 00:17:59,366
It's 10:05.
348
00:17:59,368 --> 00:18:01,302
- 10:05...
- Oh, okay, uh...
349
00:18:01,304 --> 00:18:03,699
Go... Go play with some Legos.
Daddy's getting up.
350
00:18:03,701 --> 00:18:05,034
- Now go, go play.
- I... I need...
351
00:18:05,036 --> 00:18:07,334
- I need my, uh, my mask.
- The nasty... Oh.
352
00:18:07,336 --> 00:18:10,567
Don't... Close your mouth. Don't breathe.
Don't say nothing. Just...
353
00:18:10,569 --> 00:18:12,768
- Can I... Just...
- That mask...
354
00:18:12,770 --> 00:18:15,501
- The little...
- Thank you!
355
00:18:15,503 --> 00:18:17,235
Come on, baby, go.
Just play Legos.
356
00:18:17,237 --> 00:18:20,769
Go play some Legos.
I'ma be there. Daddy's coming.
357
00:18:20,771 --> 00:18:22,068
- All right.
- You have a kid?
358
00:18:22,070 --> 00:18:23,269
He was at a sleepover.
359
00:18:23,271 --> 00:18:25,035
Obviously,
I did not want him to see this.
360
00:18:25,037 --> 00:18:27,301
Oh, my God.
This is terrible.
361
00:18:27,303 --> 00:18:30,003
- Baby, where are you going?
- I'm never late.
362
00:18:30,005 --> 00:18:33,668
I'm so late!
I'm so late, so late, so late.
363
00:18:36,371 --> 00:18:38,536
You're married?
364
00:18:38,538 --> 00:18:39,970
Wait. No...
365
00:18:39,972 --> 00:18:42,971
Okay, what time does
she get here, huh? 10:18?
366
00:18:42,973 --> 00:18:44,503
- Jerk!
- It's not what you think...
367
00:18:46,739 --> 00:18:48,804
I knew
that wasn't a mask.
368
00:18:51,305 --> 00:18:55,170
45K. I know it's a starter
model for me, but I'm in the game now.
369
00:18:56,838 --> 00:18:58,304
Ali, hey, hey!
Good of you to join us.
370
00:18:58,306 --> 00:19:00,502
- Hey!
- You know Devonta and John, right?
371
00:19:00,504 --> 00:19:01,902
- Devonta, of course!
- Yeah.
372
00:19:01,904 --> 00:19:04,637
- I love your hair like that.
- Your hair...
373
00:19:04,639 --> 00:19:06,036
Thank you! Hey, John.
374
00:19:06,038 --> 00:19:07,670
I can't see your hair
all the way up there.
375
00:19:07,672 --> 00:19:09,470
Good to see you, though.
376
00:19:09,472 --> 00:19:11,370
- Hey, you got a little some...
- Hey, no, you got something!
377
00:19:11,372 --> 00:19:12,736
Don't you try that, cutie.
378
00:19:12,738 --> 00:19:14,137
- Thank God, you're here.
- Yes.
379
00:19:14,139 --> 00:19:16,103
We have
a center-position situation.
380
00:19:16,105 --> 00:19:18,037
No, we don't have a
situation, we have a contract.
381
00:19:18,039 --> 00:19:19,971
- That's the situation.
- Okay.
382
00:19:19,973 --> 00:19:22,205
Uh, not asking, just informing:
you have a condom on your back.
383
00:19:22,207 --> 00:19:24,071
- A what?
- You have a condom on your back.
384
00:19:24,073 --> 00:19:26,938
A what? Oh, my God. Get it off.
Get it off! Get it off!
385
00:19:26,940 --> 00:19:29,371
Please remember this when
you're considering my raise.
386
00:19:29,373 --> 00:19:31,539
Yeah, take it to your grave
or I will kill you.
387
00:19:32,873 --> 00:19:34,905
What is
this center-position bullshit?
388
00:19:34,907 --> 00:19:37,507
Which asshole in here doesn't
understand the concept of a contract?
389
00:19:37,509 --> 00:19:39,206
- Hold...
- Kevin!
390
00:19:39,208 --> 00:19:40,639
Do not talk over me.
391
00:19:41,576 --> 00:19:43,072
Tell whichever asshole here
392
00:19:43,074 --> 00:19:45,673
who wants to try to bump Lisa
from center position
393
00:19:45,675 --> 00:19:47,074
- to step to me...
- Okay.
394
00:19:47,076 --> 00:19:48,942
...and not hide behind
you motherfuckers.
395
00:19:48,944 --> 00:19:50,207
Great.
396
00:19:50,209 --> 00:19:52,040
Tell him yourself
'cause he's right behind you.
397
00:19:52,042 --> 00:19:52,775
Where?
398
00:19:52,777 --> 00:19:54,641
Peek-a-boo.
399
00:19:54,643 --> 00:19:56,340
Business rule number one:
400
00:19:56,342 --> 00:19:58,975
You should never call somebody
an asshole behind they back.
401
00:19:58,977 --> 00:20:00,843
- You know who said that?
- No, I do not.
402
00:20:00,845 --> 00:20:02,908
- Asparagus Chevrolet.
- Who?
403
00:20:02,910 --> 00:20:06,409
You know, a co-founder
of General Motors, 1884.
404
00:20:06,411 --> 00:20:10,641
Ali Davis, meet Joe Dolla,
Jamal Barry's father.
405
00:20:10,643 --> 00:20:13,543
And manager.
406
00:20:13,545 --> 00:20:15,042
And bodyguard.
407
00:20:15,044 --> 00:20:17,709
And psychologist
and nutritionist
408
00:20:17,711 --> 00:20:20,641
and trainer and sociologist
and urologist.
409
00:20:20,643 --> 00:20:22,243
That means everything.
410
00:20:22,245 --> 00:20:24,409
- Wow, that's a lot. Uh...
- Mm-hmm.
411
00:20:25,146 --> 00:20:27,108
You know the second rule
of business?
412
00:20:27,110 --> 00:20:29,010
There's always
a win-win situation
413
00:20:29,012 --> 00:20:31,743
where everyone walks away happy.
You like that?
414
00:20:31,745 --> 00:20:33,343
I know that's right.
415
00:20:33,345 --> 00:20:36,177
But it don't always happen
like that in sports. It don't.
416
00:20:36,179 --> 00:20:37,444
Somebody got to win,
417
00:20:37,446 --> 00:20:39,711
and somebody got to taste
the agony of defeat,
418
00:20:39,713 --> 00:20:41,444
like that blind ski jumper.
419
00:20:41,446 --> 00:20:43,479
Yeah. It's a lethal day.
420
00:20:43,481 --> 00:20:45,479
Decapitated.
Just help us out here, please?
421
00:20:45,481 --> 00:20:47,878
- Ali D!
- Lisa!
422
00:20:47,880 --> 00:20:51,613
Hey, girl, look at you!
Six feet five inches of perfect.
423
00:20:51,615 --> 00:20:52,880
What's the holdup here?
424
00:20:53,214 --> 00:20:56,278
Yeah, I was gonna come over
and talk to you about that.
425
00:20:56,280 --> 00:21:00,314
We were talking about the cover
image, and...
426
00:21:00,316 --> 00:21:02,313
of course, you're guaranteed
center position.
427
00:21:02,315 --> 00:21:07,779
But we were... we were thinking
that maybe you'd split it
428
00:21:08,413 --> 00:21:10,077
with, um, Jamal Barry,
429
00:21:11,112 --> 00:21:12,379
the projected number-one
NBA draft pick?
430
00:21:13,848 --> 00:21:15,611
- Split it?
- Mm-hmm.
431
00:21:15,613 --> 00:21:18,847
Let me ask you guys a question.
Are you good at math?
432
00:21:18,849 --> 00:21:20,678
- Yes, summa cum laude.
- Not my strong suit.
433
00:21:20,680 --> 00:21:22,147
I got through.
434
00:21:22,149 --> 00:21:24,512
So how many championships
does Jamal Barry have?
435
00:21:24,514 --> 00:21:28,246
None. But this is the "Legends
and Rising Stars" issue.
436
00:21:28,248 --> 00:21:32,247
I have two championships,
three MVPs, and four gold medals.
437
00:21:32,249 --> 00:21:35,347
Now add that up and you tell me if
I'm gonna share my magazine cover
438
00:21:35,349 --> 00:21:38,379
with whatever dude is here
or the flavor of the month.
439
00:21:38,381 --> 00:21:39,913
Uh...
440
00:21:41,383 --> 00:21:44,114
Okay. You're right.
You are right.
441
00:21:44,116 --> 00:21:46,315
Give the woman the throne,
gents!
442
00:21:46,317 --> 00:21:49,913
She's earned it.
And we have a contract.
443
00:21:49,915 --> 00:21:53,149
Boom! I'm so glad my agents
are mad geniuses.
444
00:21:53,151 --> 00:21:55,048
And Ali, you got an old
wine stain on your blouse.
445
00:21:55,050 --> 00:21:58,149
Girl, yes,
wine next week! Your house.
446
00:21:58,151 --> 00:22:00,283
- So, you mentioned win-win.
- Yes.
447
00:22:00,285 --> 00:22:02,082
And I ate all those shrimps
over there.
448
00:22:02,084 --> 00:22:03,815
You understand? So, I win.
449
00:22:04,084 --> 00:22:06,917
My son Jamal is not gonna be
a part of this photo shoot.
450
00:22:06,919 --> 00:22:09,850
You lose. Now watch this.
451
00:22:09,852 --> 00:22:11,182
Jamal, let's go!
452
00:22:14,419 --> 00:22:16,684
Jamal, it was...
453
00:22:16,686 --> 00:22:17,884
...very nice to...
454
00:22:19,254 --> 00:22:21,550
- Well, that could've gone worse.
- How?
455
00:22:21,552 --> 00:22:24,117
Could've noticed the used condom
on your back earlier.
456
00:22:24,853 --> 00:22:26,085
That was a rubber glove.
457
00:22:26,087 --> 00:22:28,217
I was dyeing my hair,
you asshole.
458
00:22:28,219 --> 00:22:30,884
Yeah...
dyeing your hair with semen.
459
00:22:32,020 --> 00:22:33,617
So, the wine gal at Rite Aid
460
00:22:33,619 --> 00:22:36,353
said this was their bestseller
for bachelorette parties.
461
00:22:36,355 --> 00:22:39,519
Well, your taste in champagne
hasn't evolved much since college,
462
00:22:39,521 --> 00:22:41,019
but down the hatch.
463
00:22:41,021 --> 00:22:42,752
Kinda Chablis
meets NyQuil and bleach.
464
00:22:42,754 --> 00:22:44,185
- Oh, it's burnt.
- Hello, everyone!
465
00:22:44,187 --> 00:22:46,152
- Hey, girl.
- Sorry I'm late.
466
00:22:46,154 --> 00:22:48,787
Ah. Look at you and your boobies.
467
00:22:48,789 --> 00:22:50,054
I picked up some champagne.
468
00:22:50,056 --> 00:22:51,220
Thank God,
real champagne!
469
00:22:51,222 --> 00:22:53,054
Good. Because mine sucked.
470
00:22:53,056 --> 00:22:55,453
Happy last days of
being a single woman, cousin.
471
00:22:55,455 --> 00:22:56,854
Lots of dicks here.
472
00:22:56,856 --> 00:22:58,420
Okay, you need to put that down.
473
00:22:58,422 --> 00:22:59,854
Oh.
474
00:22:59,856 --> 00:23:01,188
- What'd I miss?
- Uh-oh.
475
00:23:01,190 --> 00:23:02,754
- Oh, I know that face.
- Ali...
476
00:23:02,756 --> 00:23:04,254
- Yeah.
- Oh.
477
00:23:04,256 --> 00:23:06,054
You didn't make partner,
did you?
478
00:23:06,056 --> 00:23:08,421
Did that little shit Brandon
text you?
479
00:23:08,423 --> 00:23:12,921
Uh, no, your half-ass angry
smile kinda gave it all away.
480
00:23:12,923 --> 00:23:14,955
I just can't believe that Nick
481
00:23:14,957 --> 00:23:17,589
tried to sell me
some bullshit about how...
482
00:23:18,225 --> 00:23:20,388
how I don't connect with men.
483
00:23:20,889 --> 00:23:22,187
Can you believe that?
484
00:23:22,189 --> 00:23:23,354
Mm.
485
00:23:23,356 --> 00:23:24,254
Me!
486
00:23:24,656 --> 00:23:26,453
- I mean, it...
- Uh...
487
00:23:26,455 --> 00:23:28,088
- What?
- Uh, let me see that bottle.
488
00:23:28,090 --> 00:23:30,088
- Nothing!
- Nothing, I...
489
00:23:30,723 --> 00:23:32,488
Mm. Mm-mm-mm.
490
00:23:32,490 --> 00:23:34,922
Well... I don't get it.
491
00:23:34,924 --> 00:23:38,020
Right? I grew up around men
all my life.
492
00:23:38,022 --> 00:23:39,955
- Like, fuck him!
- Mm, Ali...
493
00:23:39,957 --> 00:23:41,623
I think I'm gonna call a Lyft.
494
00:23:41,625 --> 00:23:46,123
No. No. No one's calling
anything, because...
495
00:23:46,825 --> 00:23:49,156
- we should be smoking up.
- Ciarra!
496
00:23:49,158 --> 00:23:51,523
I haven't smoked that
in 25 years.
497
00:23:51,525 --> 00:23:55,023
I'm high on Christ.
I don't need it anymore.
498
00:23:55,526 --> 00:23:57,591
Okay, so...
499
00:23:57,593 --> 00:24:01,056
I have a special surprise
for you ladies.
500
00:24:01,058 --> 00:24:03,157
- Oh.
- I love surprises.
501
00:24:03,159 --> 00:24:08,823
Now, we all know that Mari and James
have a bright and shiny future. Okay?
502
00:24:08,825 --> 00:24:10,824
But specifics are good, right?
503
00:24:10,826 --> 00:24:13,225
So I hired a psychic. Come on.
504
00:24:13,227 --> 00:24:15,625
- Come on! Yes!
- That's really sweet, Olivia.
505
00:24:15,627 --> 00:24:20,457
But don't nobody want no Dionne
Warwick psychic-hotline con artist
506
00:24:20,459 --> 00:24:22,525
spinning bullshit
about our past.
507
00:24:22,527 --> 00:24:25,825
Okay, well, she's already here,
and she probably can hear you, so...
508
00:24:26,894 --> 00:24:28,091
Ah.
509
00:24:48,529 --> 00:24:49,660
Where did you find her?
510
00:24:49,662 --> 00:24:52,095
- Facebook.
- What?
511
00:24:52,563 --> 00:24:54,761
All right, ladies...
512
00:24:55,662 --> 00:25:02,295
our spiritual journey tonight
will begin with...
513
00:25:04,663 --> 00:25:07,828
Oh!
514
00:25:09,098 --> 00:25:10,928
♪ Old school
players To new school fools ♪
515
00:25:10,930 --> 00:25:12,463
♪ Kast keep it jumpin'... ♪
516
00:25:13,432 --> 00:25:14,762
♪ Nigga be tryin' to... ♪
517
00:25:14,764 --> 00:25:15,996
♪ Ain't your mama pretty ♪
518
00:25:15,998 --> 00:25:17,663
♪ Got meatballs in her titty ♪
519
00:25:17,665 --> 00:25:19,164
Bee-otch!
520
00:25:30,666 --> 00:25:31,629
You.
521
00:25:33,434 --> 00:25:34,432
My card.
522
00:25:35,501 --> 00:25:36,498
Um...
523
00:25:38,866 --> 00:25:40,497
Please tap these cards.
524
00:25:46,031 --> 00:25:47,129
Thank you.
525
00:25:52,366 --> 00:25:53,264
Hmm.
526
00:25:57,366 --> 00:25:58,397
Hmm!
527
00:26:00,000 --> 00:26:01,098
Mm.
528
00:26:02,467 --> 00:26:04,998
Mmm. Mmm!
529
00:26:05,869 --> 00:26:11,000
Mmm! Mmm! Mmm! Mmm!
530
00:26:11,668 --> 00:26:12,632
Mmm!
531
00:26:12,968 --> 00:26:15,465
Uh! Uh!
532
00:26:21,234 --> 00:26:23,600
It says here you're
having problems at work.
533
00:26:23,602 --> 00:26:27,233
Yeah, you heard me
talking to my girlfriends.
534
00:26:27,235 --> 00:26:30,034
Mm-hmm. Mm, mm. Mm!
535
00:26:30,036 --> 00:26:34,434
There's a man there who does
not want you to succeed.
536
00:26:34,436 --> 00:26:36,735
Uh, he feels threatened by you.
537
00:26:36,737 --> 00:26:38,800
Ah. A man? Try a dozen.
538
00:26:38,802 --> 00:26:42,534
There's also a man who you
will have a relationship with.
539
00:26:44,337 --> 00:26:46,668
And his name begins with...
540
00:26:48,770 --> 00:26:49,700
W.
541
00:26:52,837 --> 00:26:54,402
- Will?
- Wait, ho...
542
00:26:54,404 --> 00:26:57,003
How did you know that?
How the fuck did you know that?
543
00:26:58,571 --> 00:27:01,204
Were you spying on me
at the Highland Tap last night?
544
00:27:01,206 --> 00:27:02,704
Ma'am, I don't even know
who you are.
545
00:27:02,706 --> 00:27:04,803
Plus, I'm 19 years sober.
546
00:27:04,805 --> 00:27:08,604
If you don't count the weed
and the peyote and the crack.
547
00:27:08,606 --> 00:27:09,737
Crack?
548
00:27:11,172 --> 00:27:13,869
I was just kidding.
549
00:27:14,372 --> 00:27:15,937
Fuck the goddamn shit.
550
00:27:16,907 --> 00:27:19,637
You want to know
how to connect with men, right?
551
00:27:20,339 --> 00:27:21,972
- Uh...
- Well, I can help you
552
00:27:21,974 --> 00:27:24,238
open your inner portal.
553
00:27:25,108 --> 00:27:26,271
Yeah.
554
00:27:26,273 --> 00:27:29,137
So, let's just... have some tea.
555
00:27:29,139 --> 00:27:32,271
- Oh, I don't really like tea.
- No, no, have some.
556
00:27:32,273 --> 00:27:34,239
Oh, what's that smell?
557
00:27:34,241 --> 00:27:37,074
Oh, that's
the fey lougawou plant.
558
00:27:37,076 --> 00:27:39,105
It's an extract from Haiti.
559
00:27:39,107 --> 00:27:40,539
Then I can read you.
560
00:27:47,043 --> 00:27:48,141
Just take a sip.
561
00:27:49,041 --> 00:27:52,105
Go on, take a sip. Relax.
562
00:27:52,107 --> 00:27:53,205
- Ew.
- Oh.
563
00:27:55,740 --> 00:27:56,838
Whoa, yes!
564
00:27:58,241 --> 00:27:59,840
Now...
565
00:27:59,842 --> 00:28:01,839
Oh, yeah, drink it.
566
00:28:02,475 --> 00:28:04,406
- Get it down. Sip it.
- Uh...
567
00:28:05,109 --> 00:28:09,174
Oh. Travel within.
Feel yourself.
568
00:28:09,176 --> 00:28:12,274
Feel it. Relax.
569
00:28:12,774 --> 00:28:13,906
You are yin...
570
00:28:14,474 --> 00:28:16,339
and you are yang.
571
00:28:18,610 --> 00:28:21,875
You are both male and female.
572
00:28:24,011 --> 00:28:26,473
Ali. Oh, feel it all inside.
573
00:28:27,511 --> 00:28:29,575
Let it work your insides.
574
00:28:30,845 --> 00:28:32,042
You are yin...
575
00:28:32,510 --> 00:28:33,508
Do you feel it?
576
00:28:33,510 --> 00:28:35,707
...and you are yang.
577
00:28:36,377 --> 00:28:37,909
Journey within.
578
00:28:37,911 --> 00:28:42,043
Hear your inner,
inner, inner voice.
579
00:28:42,045 --> 00:28:43,110
Ali.
580
00:28:44,745 --> 00:28:46,642
I'm ready to
shake a tail feather!
581
00:28:47,845 --> 00:28:50,775
- We didn't get enough of that bong.
- Hey, Lyft driver!
582
00:28:50,777 --> 00:28:53,977
- Are you ready for the girls?
- Whoo!
583
00:28:53,979 --> 00:28:56,644
- The party bus has arrived!
- Yes!
584
00:28:56,646 --> 00:28:58,543
Bitch said
my fashion was terrible.
585
00:28:58,545 --> 00:29:01,543
Oh, that was so much fun.
It was such a great reading.
586
00:29:29,616 --> 00:29:32,080
Whoa, whoa, whoa,
take it easy, girl.
587
00:29:32,082 --> 00:29:35,447
I don't want to spend my special night
holding your hair out of the toilet.
588
00:29:35,449 --> 00:29:37,778
- No, girl, I'm good.
- Okay.
589
00:29:38,517 --> 00:29:40,680
I don't know
if it's that freaky tea
590
00:29:40,682 --> 00:29:43,515
or if it's all the weed
and the Hennessy,
591
00:29:43,517 --> 00:29:46,015
but honey, I am feeling it!
592
00:29:46,017 --> 00:29:48,982
Is anybody else feeling...
593
00:30:01,618 --> 00:30:04,884
That's my song!
594
00:30:04,886 --> 00:30:07,513
Uh, actually, it's my song.
595
00:30:07,515 --> 00:30:09,280
- Oh!
- You... You remember?
596
00:30:09,282 --> 00:30:10,848
Before I started
following the Lord,
597
00:30:10,850 --> 00:30:13,780
I was following 2 Live Crew
on tour.
598
00:30:13,782 --> 00:30:16,548
- It's true, it's so true.
- Oh, my God!
599
00:30:16,550 --> 00:30:19,780
Little secret here...
this song is about me. Shh.
600
00:30:25,151 --> 00:30:26,282
All right.
601
00:30:29,286 --> 00:30:32,317
Okay, I gotta go.
I gotta go. Move.
602
00:30:44,951 --> 00:30:46,816
- Ooh!
- Whoo!
603
00:31:01,654 --> 00:31:04,019
Oh, someone had
too much whiskey tonight.
604
00:31:11,955 --> 00:31:12,852
Whoo!
605
00:31:15,655 --> 00:31:16,586
Whoo!
606
00:31:24,656 --> 00:31:25,420
Whoo!
607
00:31:25,422 --> 00:31:26,953
Ah! Ah!
608
00:31:36,958 --> 00:31:39,488
Oh. Morning, Ms. Davis.
609
00:31:39,490 --> 00:31:41,555
All your signs look good,
610
00:31:41,557 --> 00:31:45,721
but I'm gonna check your vitals once more
before we release you back in the wild.
611
00:31:46,858 --> 00:31:48,856
Thank God
this one didn't die on me.
612
00:31:48,858 --> 00:31:51,823
Some dickweed shoves a whole
hairdryer into his rectum,
613
00:31:51,825 --> 00:31:53,689
electrocutes himself
in the shower,
614
00:31:53,691 --> 00:31:55,490
but somehow I'm responsible.
615
00:31:55,492 --> 00:31:57,090
I mean, who does that?
616
00:31:57,092 --> 00:31:58,824
Um, excuse me.
617
00:31:58,826 --> 00:32:00,291
- Hmm?
- Doc.
618
00:32:00,293 --> 00:32:01,790
Did you say something?
619
00:32:01,792 --> 00:32:02,657
No.
620
00:32:03,325 --> 00:32:05,024
You did. You said something
621
00:32:05,026 --> 00:32:08,824
about some dude
shoving a hairdryer up his ass.
622
00:32:09,894 --> 00:32:12,358
- I don't think I did.
- No, I heard you.
623
00:32:12,360 --> 00:32:13,724
And that's... that's weird.
624
00:32:13,726 --> 00:32:16,024
That's something
very weird to say.
625
00:32:17,060 --> 00:32:18,925
Oh, well, anyway, uh...
626
00:32:18,927 --> 00:32:21,324
Blood pressure's normal.
All good.
627
00:32:21,591 --> 00:32:23,658
I must be losing it.
628
00:32:23,660 --> 00:32:26,757
Starting today, no more drinking at work.
Just cocaine.
629
00:32:26,759 --> 00:32:30,092
Hey! Why are you telling
me about your coke problem?
630
00:32:30,094 --> 00:32:33,123
A, it makes me very uncomfortable.
You're a doctor.
631
00:32:33,125 --> 00:32:35,590
And B,
just too much information.
632
00:32:36,928 --> 00:32:39,492
- I didn't say anything.
- You did.
633
00:32:39,494 --> 00:32:41,592
- Are you taping this?
- What?
634
00:32:41,594 --> 00:32:43,026
I'm calling a lawyer.
635
00:32:44,060 --> 00:32:45,625
You need rehab.
636
00:32:46,393 --> 00:32:47,693
Where's my cell phone?
637
00:32:47,695 --> 00:32:49,757
Oh, you're okay. Hallelujah.
638
00:32:49,759 --> 00:32:52,326
Praise the Lord.
I've been praying and fasting all night.
639
00:32:52,328 --> 00:32:54,827
- I'm starving! Muah, muah.
- Oh, you are so dramatic.
640
00:32:54,829 --> 00:32:56,458
And my knees are killing me.
641
00:32:56,460 --> 00:32:58,260
Hey, girl, I got some Combos.
Raided the vending machine!
642
00:32:58,262 --> 00:33:01,626
This place
smells like gonorrhea. Ugh!
643
00:33:01,628 --> 00:33:03,193
- What did you say?
- Hmm?
644
00:33:03,195 --> 00:33:05,961
- Ms. Davis, you're free to go.
- Oh, finally!
645
00:33:05,963 --> 00:33:08,227
I can take you home
or I brought work clothes.
646
00:33:08,229 --> 00:33:09,693
Work.
647
00:33:09,695 --> 00:33:11,362
Ali, can't you
take it easy for a change?
648
00:33:11,364 --> 00:33:12,795
No, no, no. Don't do that.
649
00:33:12,797 --> 00:33:14,828
You know what,
close that so I can get dressed.
650
00:33:16,663 --> 00:33:18,394
- Hey, queen.
- Hi, how are you?
651
00:33:18,396 --> 00:33:21,062
I'm good.
So... here's the T.
652
00:33:21,064 --> 00:33:23,929
We had a bachelorette party last
night, and we're a little hung over.
653
00:33:23,931 --> 00:33:27,562
So if you could just
hook us up with some... Oxy?
654
00:33:27,564 --> 00:33:29,328
No, ma'am, I'm sorry.
I can't do that.
655
00:33:29,330 --> 00:33:30,795
Darvocet?
656
00:33:31,230 --> 00:33:32,162
Percocet?
657
00:33:33,065 --> 00:33:34,862
Any 'cets?
658
00:33:34,864 --> 00:33:37,830
All the 'cets? Oh, you nasty!
All the 'cets?
659
00:33:37,832 --> 00:33:39,563
No, ma'am,
we can't do that. Sorry.
660
00:33:39,565 --> 00:33:42,697
Okay, this is gonna
change your mind.
661
00:33:42,699 --> 00:33:44,229
Gonna blow your mind.
662
00:33:44,231 --> 00:33:46,164
- No, I'm sorry.
- Meet me on eight.
663
00:33:46,166 --> 00:33:47,664
Girl, I can't do transactions
in public like this.
664
00:33:47,666 --> 00:33:49,163
On eight, in the closet.
665
00:33:50,199 --> 00:33:53,031
Oh, my doctor says
I can't drive for a week.
666
00:33:53,033 --> 00:33:56,797
Which should give me enough time
to find my driver's license.
667
00:33:57,633 --> 00:34:00,165
Which could be anywhere,
after last night.
668
00:34:00,167 --> 00:34:03,999
Well, at least I don't have to peel
used condoms off your back today.
669
00:34:04,001 --> 00:34:05,032
So far.
670
00:34:06,534 --> 00:34:08,732
Okay, stop doing that.
671
00:34:08,734 --> 00:34:10,099
Stop doing what?
672
00:34:10,101 --> 00:34:12,000
Talking
without moving your mouth
673
00:34:12,002 --> 00:34:15,299
and saying rude shit you should
not be saying to your boss.
674
00:34:15,301 --> 00:34:16,767
I swear on my life
675
00:34:16,769 --> 00:34:18,366
I would never say
anything disrespectful
676
00:34:18,368 --> 00:34:19,833
or inappropriate to you ever.
677
00:34:19,835 --> 00:34:21,933
Which is more than
I can say for you.
678
00:34:21,935 --> 00:34:23,668
Right there. You just did it.
679
00:34:23,670 --> 00:34:25,333
You said,
"More than I can say for you."
680
00:34:25,335 --> 00:34:27,500
And then there was that crack
about the condom on my back.
681
00:34:27,502 --> 00:34:30,168
- I heard you say it!
- But I... I didn't say it.
682
00:34:30,170 --> 00:34:31,934
Holy shit,
are you reading my mind?
683
00:34:31,936 --> 00:34:33,368
Because if you can hear
my inner thoughts,
684
00:34:33,370 --> 00:34:35,067
I am super fucked!
685
00:34:35,069 --> 00:34:37,733
I can hear your inner thoughts,
and you are super fucked!
686
00:34:40,334 --> 00:34:41,901
Stop screaming!
687
00:34:41,903 --> 00:34:43,699
I said stop doing that!
688
00:34:43,701 --> 00:34:45,266
- Okay, Brandon, pull over.
- Okay.
689
00:34:45,268 --> 00:34:47,101
- Pull over, I need some air.
- I'm pulling over.
690
00:34:47,103 --> 00:34:48,701
I need some air.
Pull over right here!
691
00:34:48,703 --> 00:34:49,800
I'm pulling over!
692
00:34:50,102 --> 00:34:53,234
- Stop the fucking car!
- I'm stopping the car!
693
00:34:53,236 --> 00:34:54,901
I stopped thinking! I swear!
694
00:34:54,903 --> 00:34:56,400
- I'm not screaming inside my head! Hello?
- No, no, no, no.
695
00:34:56,402 --> 00:34:58,233
Wait, what are you doing?
You don't do stairs!
696
00:34:58,235 --> 00:34:59,801
What are you doing?
697
00:35:02,303 --> 00:35:03,667
Okay, okay.
698
00:35:05,470 --> 00:35:06,801
Fresh air.
699
00:35:10,036 --> 00:35:13,301
Goddamn dog.
I wish I could shit anywhere.
700
00:35:13,303 --> 00:35:15,201
That would be cool.
701
00:35:15,203 --> 00:35:17,203
These shoes
are fucking killing me.
702
00:35:17,205 --> 00:35:19,103
What was the name
of that cheese that I liked?
703
00:35:19,105 --> 00:35:20,936
Michael Keaton
was the best Batman.
704
00:35:20,938 --> 00:35:23,936
Yes, bitch,
I look good in this hat. I know.
705
00:35:23,938 --> 00:35:25,870
That's water
on my pants, not pee.
706
00:35:25,872 --> 00:35:27,837
- Is it "croyssant" or "croissant"?
- Oh!
707
00:35:27,839 --> 00:35:30,103
Nothing wrong with being a
virgin, no matter what my mom says.
708
00:35:30,105 --> 00:35:32,137
- French people are so cool.
- Did I let the dog out?
709
00:35:32,139 --> 00:35:34,269
I wish I'd fucked a
black broad before I got married.
710
00:35:34,773 --> 00:35:37,003
Hello, Oprah!
711
00:35:38,772 --> 00:35:41,103
No! No! No! No!
712
00:35:44,573 --> 00:35:46,970
Would you stop running?
It's cobblestone!
713
00:35:46,972 --> 00:35:48,272
Shut up, just shut up!
714
00:35:48,274 --> 00:35:50,206
- Good morning, Ms. Davis.
- Good morning.
715
00:35:50,208 --> 00:35:53,605
This whole wearing ladies'
underwear thing is fantastic.
716
00:35:53,607 --> 00:35:54,971
Who knew?
717
00:35:56,073 --> 00:35:58,307
Ali, can you hear other people?
718
00:35:58,309 --> 00:36:02,338
Key to signing Matt Ryan: befriending
his wife through mutual friends at BC.
719
00:36:02,340 --> 00:36:05,007
What are the odds that
we sponsor the same charity?
720
00:36:05,009 --> 00:36:06,806
She vouches for me,
boom, I'm in.
721
00:36:07,075 --> 00:36:10,475
Shit, man, that's some next-level
ass-kissing right there. Respect!
722
00:36:10,477 --> 00:36:12,640
How does this douche
have a nicer watch than me?
723
00:36:12,642 --> 00:36:14,307
Got to be family money.
724
00:36:14,309 --> 00:36:16,907
Shit, I hope no one figures out
that this Rolex is a fake.
725
00:36:17,543 --> 00:36:19,306
- What up, Ali D?
- Gentlemen.
726
00:36:19,308 --> 00:36:22,074
Ugh! I hate my voice.
I hate my nose. I hate my chin.
727
00:36:22,076 --> 00:36:23,908
I suck, I suck, I suck!
728
00:36:24,243 --> 00:36:27,376
Pretend I'm working,
pretend I'm working, pretend I'm working.
729
00:36:27,378 --> 00:36:29,608
I'm pretty sure
I still reek of tequila.
730
00:36:29,610 --> 00:36:30,776
- No more day drinking.
- Good morning.
731
00:36:30,778 --> 00:36:32,442
Look straight ahead.
732
00:36:32,810 --> 00:36:33,909
God, these piercings hurt.
733
00:36:33,911 --> 00:36:35,310
God, these piercings hurt!
734
00:36:35,312 --> 00:36:37,309
Come on,
anal isn't cheating.
735
00:36:37,311 --> 00:36:39,075
I wonder if it's too late
to become a marine biologist.
736
00:36:39,077 --> 00:36:40,609
I don't think
this deodorant is working.
737
00:36:40,611 --> 00:36:41,843
What? The Jets?
738
00:36:41,845 --> 00:36:43,141
Are you fucking kidding me?
739
00:36:43,143 --> 00:36:45,143
Are you fucking
kidding me?
740
00:36:45,145 --> 00:36:46,610
See, this is why Dad left.
741
00:36:46,946 --> 00:36:48,777
This is exactly why Dad left
because of shit like this.
742
00:36:48,779 --> 00:36:50,043
Oh, hey, you two.
743
00:36:50,479 --> 00:36:55,277
Ooh, I'd pay $10,000
to see those nipples. Plus tax.
744
00:37:02,111 --> 00:37:04,042
No, this is not happening.
This is not...
745
00:37:04,044 --> 00:37:06,111
Oh, my God, please make it stop!
746
00:37:06,113 --> 00:37:08,242
- Oh, God, you walk fast in those heels.
- Please, God, make it stop.
747
00:37:08,244 --> 00:37:11,043
Is this thing still on?
Testing, testing.
748
00:37:11,045 --> 00:37:13,477
I enjoy apple slices
with cinnamon.
749
00:37:13,479 --> 00:37:16,277
Okay, your snack choices
do not interest me right now!
750
00:37:16,279 --> 00:37:19,410
- Oh, I'm so scared.
- I need help! Can't you see that?
751
00:37:19,412 --> 00:37:21,410
Help me! Help me!
752
00:37:21,412 --> 00:37:23,343
- Help me!
- Okay, I'm helping! I'm helping.
753
00:37:23,345 --> 00:37:26,279
I am booking us a psychiatrist
with side-by-side couches.
754
00:37:26,281 --> 00:37:28,911
No, no, no! No more doctors!
I can't handle doctors!
755
00:37:28,913 --> 00:37:31,012
I'm in the middle of too much
work shit for this!
756
00:37:31,014 --> 00:37:32,611
I can't handle this! I can't...
757
00:37:32,613 --> 00:37:37,145
Oh, my God. I'm so hot.
I'm so hot. Oh, my God.
758
00:37:37,147 --> 00:37:39,645
I'm getting hot! I'm hot!
759
00:37:39,647 --> 00:37:41,913
- Do something.
- Okay, okay, okay!
760
00:37:41,915 --> 00:37:43,678
You know
what's weird about this?
761
00:37:43,680 --> 00:37:46,046
When people hear voices,
it's usually God or Satan,
762
00:37:46,048 --> 00:37:47,412
not their assistant.
763
00:37:47,414 --> 00:37:50,345
Okay, wait.
Let me see something. Move!
764
00:37:52,181 --> 00:37:54,346
Yo, I want some sushi.
But it's Monday.
765
00:37:54,348 --> 00:37:56,414
How many pees a day is too many?
I gotta get my prostate checked.
766
00:37:56,416 --> 00:37:58,147
I am not
going back to naked yoga.
767
00:37:58,149 --> 00:38:00,048
Another pair of sneakers?
What the fuck?
768
00:38:00,050 --> 00:38:02,213
- Did I leave the back door open?
- Tinder or Grindr?
769
00:38:02,215 --> 00:38:04,148
Junk, junk, junk in the trunk.
770
00:38:04,150 --> 00:38:05,748
Damn! How the hell
did she get pregnant?
771
00:38:05,750 --> 00:38:07,381
- I pulled out twice.
- Oh, my God!
772
00:38:07,383 --> 00:38:10,881
Okay, so apparently
I only hear men's voices.
773
00:38:10,883 --> 00:38:12,747
And yours.
774
00:38:12,749 --> 00:38:15,282
Okay. Ouch.
Wait, wait, wait.
775
00:38:15,284 --> 00:38:17,249
Walk me through last night...
the bachelorette party.
776
00:38:17,251 --> 00:38:20,082
Did... Did you gals get into
any controlled substances?
777
00:38:20,084 --> 00:38:22,216
- Weed? X? Coke? Ayahuasca? Meth?
- A little. No.
778
00:38:22,218 --> 00:38:24,348
- LSD? Fentanyl? Bath salt?
- No!
779
00:38:24,350 --> 00:38:26,883
Are you in a K hole?
780
00:38:26,885 --> 00:38:28,017
Wait.
781
00:38:28,019 --> 00:38:29,749
There was this psychic. Sister.
782
00:38:29,751 --> 00:38:31,415
Yes! Yes! Sister!
783
00:38:31,417 --> 00:38:33,884
And she was supposed to help me
understand men better.
784
00:38:33,886 --> 00:38:36,417
She gave me this tea, this tea,
and she made me drink it.
785
00:38:36,419 --> 00:38:38,751
And it was nasty.
It tasted like dirt.
786
00:38:38,753 --> 00:38:41,117
- And you drank it?
- She said to!
787
00:38:41,119 --> 00:38:43,083
I thought black people stopped
drinking tea after Get Out.
788
00:38:43,085 --> 00:38:44,817
You forgot to stay woke.
789
00:38:44,819 --> 00:38:46,951
Shut up! We need to see Sister.
790
00:38:55,753 --> 00:38:56,650
Um, that's it.
791
00:38:57,320 --> 00:38:59,451
"Hot Chocolate
Hair Designers"?
792
00:39:00,221 --> 00:39:02,884
- Yeah.
- You drank tea from this place?
793
00:39:02,886 --> 00:39:05,620
- Hey, don't judge me.
- Okay.
794
00:39:05,622 --> 00:39:07,318
Just pull it together
and act normal.
795
00:39:07,320 --> 00:39:11,418
Yeah, girl.
She bleached all his clothes.
796
00:39:11,420 --> 00:39:13,183
- I know, I was looking outside my window.
- I...
797
00:39:13,185 --> 00:39:17,785
Mm-hmm. I woulda did the same thing.
Yeah. Mm-hmm.
798
00:39:21,887 --> 00:39:24,452
Hi, ladies. Excuse me.
799
00:39:24,454 --> 00:39:27,219
I'm looking for a psychic
by the name of Sister.
800
00:39:27,221 --> 00:39:29,385
Um, I heard she works here.
801
00:39:31,454 --> 00:39:34,787
Hey, Sister!
You got customers.
802
00:39:34,789 --> 00:39:36,521
Well, send 'em on back.
803
00:39:36,523 --> 00:39:37,819
Through that curtain.
804
00:39:41,788 --> 00:39:44,521
- Come on!
- ♪ Dance with me, dance with me ♪
805
00:39:44,523 --> 00:39:48,455
♪ And romance with me
Romance with me ♪
806
00:39:48,457 --> 00:39:55,421
♪ Oh, baby
Don't you see me crying? ♪
807
00:39:55,423 --> 00:40:00,522
♪ I'll do you right, right
Baby tonight ♪
808
00:40:00,524 --> 00:40:01,722
- Hi.
- Hi.
809
00:40:01,724 --> 00:40:03,590
You looking for indica
or sativa?
810
00:40:03,592 --> 00:40:07,589
Look, I got this hybrid
called Gorilla Glue.
811
00:40:07,591 --> 00:40:13,189
Baby, it'll take you up and
then lay you back down to chill.
812
00:40:13,724 --> 00:40:15,622
I'm not here to buy weed.
813
00:40:15,624 --> 00:40:18,557
I actually need psychic advice,
please.
814
00:40:18,559 --> 00:40:20,223
I was just kidding.
815
00:40:20,225 --> 00:40:21,323
Oh.
816
00:40:21,625 --> 00:40:24,257
We all know weed is illegal
in the state of Georgia.
817
00:40:24,259 --> 00:40:26,791
- Okay.
- For the moment.
818
00:40:26,793 --> 00:40:30,822
- You can sit over there.
- I can... just get a quick wash.
819
00:40:30,824 --> 00:40:31,989
So...
820
00:40:34,192 --> 00:40:36,524
what can I do for you, baby?
821
00:40:37,825 --> 00:40:42,359
You did a... a tarot reading at my
friend Mari's bachelorette night.
822
00:40:42,361 --> 00:40:44,257
- Mm-hmm.
- And you made me drink
823
00:40:44,259 --> 00:40:46,492
- this really funky tea.
- Mm.
824
00:40:46,494 --> 00:40:49,859
And, um, it messed me up.
So, what was in it?
825
00:40:49,861 --> 00:40:51,658
Oh, that was just jasmine tea.
826
00:40:52,562 --> 00:40:55,359
- Oh.
- And a teeny bit of pot.
827
00:40:56,828 --> 00:41:00,394
And a teeny, tiny bit of... X.
828
00:41:00,396 --> 00:41:02,694
- What?
- FYI, you signed a waiver.
829
00:41:02,696 --> 00:41:06,827
- So you dosed me?
- No, no, no. See, people... People like it.
830
00:41:06,829 --> 00:41:10,028
People enjoy this, generally.
But what do you want me to do?
831
00:41:10,030 --> 00:41:11,162
- Some dry cleaning?
- Mm-mm.
832
00:41:11,164 --> 00:41:12,594
Did she... Did you shit yourself?
833
00:41:12,596 --> 00:41:15,194
- No. No. No.
- Did she shit herself?
834
00:41:15,196 --> 00:41:17,328
- No! No.
- Oh.
835
00:41:17,330 --> 00:41:18,961
Okay, so...
836
00:41:19,264 --> 00:41:22,260
- This tea with ecstasy...
- Okay.
837
00:41:22,262 --> 00:41:25,659
...um, gave me psychic powers.
838
00:41:26,161 --> 00:41:27,627
- And...
- Mm-hmm.
839
00:41:27,629 --> 00:41:29,161
...now, I know
you said you wanted
840
00:41:29,163 --> 00:41:31,160
to help me
understand men better,
841
00:41:31,162 --> 00:41:35,528
but now... Now I can literally
hear people's inner thoughts.
842
00:41:35,530 --> 00:41:38,228
So, you can hear
what I'm thinking right now?
843
00:41:38,230 --> 00:41:41,429
No. Not you, just...
just men.
844
00:41:42,696 --> 00:41:43,995
It's true.
845
00:41:43,997 --> 00:41:46,462
And it's driving me nuts.
Please help.
846
00:41:47,664 --> 00:41:49,529
Amazing. Amazing!
847
00:41:49,531 --> 00:41:52,795
- No, it's not.
- Yes, it is! That's amazing!
848
00:41:52,797 --> 00:41:54,529
This is the most amazing thing.
849
00:41:54,531 --> 00:41:56,663
- You know, the website said...
- Website?
850
00:41:56,665 --> 00:41:59,696
...that this new tea from Haiti
was coldblooded.
851
00:41:59,698 --> 00:42:00,929
It said it was the shit.
852
00:42:00,931 --> 00:42:02,562
But this!
853
00:42:04,132 --> 00:42:06,564
This is a psychic phenomenon.
854
00:42:06,566 --> 00:42:08,663
- No, it's not.
- Look...
855
00:42:09,366 --> 00:42:10,830
you got the shine now.
856
00:42:10,832 --> 00:42:12,997
I don't want the shine.
That doesn't sound good.
857
00:42:12,999 --> 00:42:14,497
- Yeah, you got the shine.
- You got it.
858
00:42:14,499 --> 00:42:17,032
So, what do you think
I'm supposed to do about it?
859
00:42:17,034 --> 00:42:18,996
Well... look.
860
00:42:18,998 --> 00:42:21,799
I know I always said, you
know, "What is he thinking?"
861
00:42:21,801 --> 00:42:22,931
And now I know.
862
00:42:22,933 --> 00:42:23,964
And you don't want to know
863
00:42:23,966 --> 00:42:24,965
because it's not good.
864
00:42:24,967 --> 00:42:26,798
Okay, just please...
865
00:42:26,800 --> 00:42:28,465
get the men out of my head.
866
00:42:28,735 --> 00:42:33,965
So, you're telling me that you came
in here to get rid of this ability?
867
00:42:33,967 --> 00:42:35,898
- Yes.
- Are you crazy?
868
00:42:35,900 --> 00:42:38,066
No. Do you know
how many men I work with?
869
00:42:38,068 --> 00:42:40,832
Honey, relax. Breathe.
870
00:42:40,834 --> 00:42:42,401
- Listen, come here.
- What?
871
00:42:42,403 --> 00:42:44,266
- Come, come, come on.
- That's a lot of rocks.
872
00:42:44,268 --> 00:42:45,567
Thank you. Come here, let me...
873
00:42:45,569 --> 00:42:47,335
- Those are nice.
- Thank you, thank you.
874
00:42:47,337 --> 00:42:50,000
- Okay. Oh, God.
- Now, listen. Just calm down.
875
00:42:50,002 --> 00:42:51,066
- You feel that?
- Yeah.
876
00:42:51,068 --> 00:42:52,567
- You feel that?
- Oh, yeah.
877
00:42:52,569 --> 00:42:54,134
- You feel it? Okay. Listen...
- I do. I actually do.
878
00:42:54,136 --> 00:42:55,633
- I feel that.
- Good. Calm down.
879
00:42:55,635 --> 00:42:58,467
- Okay.
- Now, weren't you the one...
880
00:42:58,469 --> 00:42:59,902
Mm.
881
00:42:59,904 --> 00:43:03,502
...complaining about men
holding you down at the job?
882
00:43:03,504 --> 00:43:05,602
- Yeah. That was me.
- Yeah, that was you.
883
00:43:05,604 --> 00:43:07,334
- Yeah, that was good.
- That was you. Uh-huh.
884
00:43:07,336 --> 00:43:09,235
- Yeah, right there. Mm.
- Right here? Okay.
885
00:43:09,237 --> 00:43:12,302
Now, if you can read
their thoughts...
886
00:43:13,236 --> 00:43:14,868
how they gonna do that?
887
00:43:23,606 --> 00:43:25,536
You could get inside
Joe Dolla's head.
888
00:43:26,172 --> 00:43:28,570
- Or Jamal's.
- You're right.
889
00:43:28,572 --> 00:43:31,537
And I can
sign the hell out of him.
890
00:43:32,104 --> 00:43:34,171
- There you go.
- You know what?
891
00:43:34,173 --> 00:43:36,171
I think I'm gonna hold on
to this gift after all.
892
00:43:36,173 --> 00:43:37,268
Thank you, Sister.
893
00:43:41,772 --> 00:43:43,836
- See you later.
- Kevin, my man.
894
00:43:43,838 --> 00:43:47,270
Do we have any meetings on the
books for Joe Dolla and Jamal yet?
895
00:43:47,272 --> 00:43:49,503
Nothing yet,
but we are working on it.
896
00:43:49,505 --> 00:43:52,404
Just poker at Nick's house
tonight, and you're not invited.
897
00:43:58,040 --> 00:44:00,204
Joe Dolla, here I come.
898
00:44:07,006 --> 00:44:09,904
Okay, gentlemen...
899
00:44:09,906 --> 00:44:14,005
I am going to climb
into your minds
900
00:44:14,007 --> 00:44:15,738
and empty your wallets.
901
00:44:25,541 --> 00:44:26,774
Hey!
902
00:44:26,776 --> 00:44:29,339
- Ali! What's up?
- Hi.
903
00:44:29,341 --> 00:44:30,940
You here
to drop off paperwork?
904
00:44:30,942 --> 00:44:32,674
What the fuck
are you doing here?
905
00:44:32,676 --> 00:44:35,074
No, I am here
for secret poker night.
906
00:44:35,676 --> 00:44:37,272
Thanks for inviting me finally.
907
00:44:37,274 --> 00:44:39,240
- Hey, I brought a gift.
- It's not a secret.
908
00:44:39,242 --> 00:44:41,508
But super glad
you've been invited... finally.
909
00:44:41,510 --> 00:44:43,840
- Me, too.
- Huh? I invited you? That's...
910
00:44:43,842 --> 00:44:45,708
No, I invited you.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
911
00:44:57,210 --> 00:45:01,141
Pair of sevens? Fuck it.
I'm bluffing these fools.
912
00:45:02,210 --> 00:45:04,944
This is literally
the worst hand ever dealt
913
00:45:04,946 --> 00:45:06,076
in the history of poker.
914
00:45:06,878 --> 00:45:09,575
Three fives, come to papa.
915
00:45:11,545 --> 00:45:13,509
Grant lost some weight.
916
00:45:13,511 --> 00:45:15,877
- Bet's to you, Miss Win-Win.
- Ah.
917
00:45:15,879 --> 00:45:19,210
It's just Miss Win tonight,
but I'm in.
918
00:45:20,046 --> 00:45:21,111
Two thou.
919
00:45:21,113 --> 00:45:22,944
And that's a no.
920
00:45:25,513 --> 00:45:28,712
I smell toast.
Am I having a stroke?
921
00:45:28,714 --> 00:45:32,044
Wait, I have toast in my pocket.
922
00:45:32,046 --> 00:45:33,410
Okay...
923
00:45:34,548 --> 00:45:37,378
Gotta stop playing poker
with poor people.
924
00:45:41,882 --> 00:45:44,613
Shit,
I'm missing Real Housewives.
925
00:45:44,615 --> 00:45:45,745
Nothing.
926
00:45:48,315 --> 00:45:49,846
I'm so rich.
927
00:45:51,612 --> 00:45:54,977
I'm gonna freeze my sperm
and have baby ice cubes.
928
00:45:56,480 --> 00:45:58,245
Ooh, Yahtzee!
929
00:45:58,247 --> 00:46:00,579
All right. Two kings.
Let's look for number three.
930
00:46:00,581 --> 00:46:02,345
You can't win this hand.
931
00:46:02,347 --> 00:46:04,412
Played tight.
It's time to make a push.
932
00:46:04,414 --> 00:46:06,046
Two hearts? Yes!
933
00:46:06,048 --> 00:46:08,746
- Seriously?
- Aw, shit.
934
00:46:08,748 --> 00:46:11,446
Great pot odds,
with two streets to come.
935
00:46:11,448 --> 00:46:13,347
- King of diamonds.
- Nine, five, offsuit.
936
00:46:13,349 --> 00:46:14,747
What am I supposed to do
with this?
937
00:46:14,749 --> 00:46:16,447
Never win shit here.
938
00:46:18,516 --> 00:46:21,380
She got balls. Big lady balls.
939
00:46:23,016 --> 00:46:24,981
Young lady...
940
00:46:24,983 --> 00:46:27,881
I see how you winning all these
games and stuff, you know?
941
00:46:27,883 --> 00:46:30,681
And I know there's something
going on, you dig?
942
00:46:30,683 --> 00:46:33,683
It's a numerical anomaly,
that's what it is.
943
00:46:33,685 --> 00:46:37,915
No, Joe. I'm just really good
at reading people.
944
00:46:37,917 --> 00:46:38,948
Like you.
945
00:46:39,584 --> 00:46:41,348
Aw, shit.
946
00:46:41,350 --> 00:46:43,215
What's happening?
947
00:46:43,217 --> 00:46:47,548
Like me! That's what she said.
She said like me.
948
00:46:47,550 --> 00:46:49,582
Like me
is a valuable skill, girl.
949
00:46:49,584 --> 00:46:51,917
Uh, it's like being able
to start a fire in the woods.
950
00:46:51,919 --> 00:46:54,449
I should really learn how
to start a fire in the woods.
951
00:46:54,451 --> 00:46:56,983
Then again,
when am I ever in the woods?
952
00:46:56,985 --> 00:46:59,816
Squirrels are terrifying.
And frogs.
953
00:46:59,818 --> 00:47:02,116
I'll raise you another three.
954
00:47:02,118 --> 00:47:06,282
Statistically,
I've got 12 outs with two streets to come.
955
00:47:06,284 --> 00:47:07,916
The pretzels are delicious.
956
00:47:09,119 --> 00:47:12,418
I feel the heat
coming off those cards. I'm out.
957
00:47:22,322 --> 00:47:24,686
Damn! I got to cut one.
958
00:47:24,688 --> 00:47:26,518
It's that egg salad.
959
00:47:26,520 --> 00:47:28,518
I'll sneak it out with a cough.
960
00:47:31,687 --> 00:47:33,086
- Ew!
- What the fuck?
961
00:47:33,088 --> 00:47:35,852
- Ugh!
- Just... just wow.
962
00:47:36,554 --> 00:47:38,152
Ugh, is that egg salad?
963
00:47:38,154 --> 00:47:40,019
Damn! Could we open up a window?
964
00:47:40,021 --> 00:47:42,419
Whoever did that
needs to go see a doctor.
965
00:47:45,089 --> 00:47:49,287
Seven, deuce, offsuit.
Who dealt this shit-ass hand?
966
00:47:49,289 --> 00:47:51,421
Oh, damn it! I did.
967
00:47:51,423 --> 00:47:53,554
Fuck it.
I'm gonna take my stand here.
968
00:47:53,556 --> 00:47:56,320
I'll raise you two thousand.
969
00:47:58,957 --> 00:48:02,021
For the love of God, Ali,
don't take all of Joe Dolla's money.
970
00:48:02,023 --> 00:48:04,622
Let the greedy motherfucker
win.
971
00:48:05,657 --> 00:48:07,621
I kinda like this crazy woman.
972
00:48:07,623 --> 00:48:10,020
Well, it's just me and you,
Joe Dolla.
973
00:48:10,022 --> 00:48:13,153
Alpha Dog vs. Mama Bear!
974
00:48:14,122 --> 00:48:16,555
Is this crazy lady bluffing?
975
00:48:16,557 --> 00:48:18,520
I got to bluff the bluffer.
976
00:48:18,522 --> 00:48:20,120
Make her the bluffee.
977
00:48:20,656 --> 00:48:22,121
I'm all in.
978
00:48:22,123 --> 00:48:23,922
I ain't playing
no more games with you.
979
00:48:23,924 --> 00:48:25,089
I'm all in.
980
00:48:25,091 --> 00:48:26,522
I'm all in.
981
00:48:27,325 --> 00:48:29,955
What you got?
982
00:48:46,759 --> 00:48:47,824
Hm.
983
00:48:48,658 --> 00:48:50,190
Well-played, Dolla.
984
00:48:53,326 --> 00:48:56,224
Oh, a little bit of pee came out.
985
00:48:56,226 --> 00:48:59,525
I tell you, this woman's a charm.
She's my good luck charm.
986
00:48:59,527 --> 00:49:01,824
She coming
to the meeting tomorrow, Nick?
987
00:49:01,826 --> 00:49:04,159
You got it, Joe.
Anything you say.
988
00:49:04,161 --> 00:49:06,925
Wouldn't be a meeting
without her. Right, Ali?
989
00:49:06,927 --> 00:49:08,792
I wouldn't miss it
for the world.
990
00:49:08,794 --> 00:49:10,925
That's right, girl,
you better not. You hear me?
991
00:49:10,927 --> 00:49:13,191
What the fuck just happened?
992
00:49:13,728 --> 00:49:14,959
It's a good-looking pot.
993
00:49:24,594 --> 00:49:26,225
Damn, she's fine.
994
00:49:27,128 --> 00:49:29,460
She smells like cigar smoke
and whiskey.
995
00:49:29,996 --> 00:49:31,493
So sexy. Mm!
996
00:49:32,396 --> 00:49:34,693
Shame she's with
that skinny white guy.
997
00:49:35,363 --> 00:49:36,727
How did he get her?
998
00:49:37,329 --> 00:49:38,994
He's gay.
999
00:49:38,996 --> 00:49:41,394
Gay. He's gay.
1000
00:49:41,396 --> 00:49:43,193
I'm sorry, what?
1001
00:49:43,462 --> 00:49:47,696
Oh, I thought you said something
about the guy that's always with me.
1002
00:49:47,698 --> 00:49:49,430
He's my assistant.
1003
00:49:49,432 --> 00:49:51,830
He's gay. He's my gay assistant.
1004
00:49:53,097 --> 00:49:54,094
Cool.
1005
00:49:55,631 --> 00:49:57,263
Wonder if I should ask her out.
1006
00:49:58,198 --> 00:50:00,227
Why can't it ever be the woman
who makes the move?
1007
00:50:01,532 --> 00:50:05,331
I wish she would just slam me against
these elevator doors and kiss me.
1008
00:50:06,966 --> 00:50:07,996
Excuse me?
1009
00:50:08,832 --> 00:50:10,763
- What are you doing?
- This.
1010
00:50:35,398 --> 00:50:37,162
Whoo!
1011
00:50:39,734 --> 00:50:41,131
- Let's take it upstairs to the loft.
- Ooh!
1012
00:50:41,133 --> 00:50:43,065
- It's sexier than the bedroom.
- Okay.
1013
00:50:43,067 --> 00:50:45,632
Wait, let me freshen up
a little bit.
1014
00:50:45,634 --> 00:50:46,831
- Bathroom's right there.
- Okay.
1015
00:50:46,833 --> 00:50:48,699
- And take your time, okay?
- Okay.
1016
00:50:48,701 --> 00:50:50,498
I got to say, it was spooky
how you read my mind.
1017
00:50:50,500 --> 00:50:53,065
That was the hottest shit ever.
1018
00:50:53,067 --> 00:50:54,097
Mm, mm.
1019
00:50:54,099 --> 00:50:55,599
Go get ready, go get ready.
1020
00:50:55,601 --> 00:50:57,331
Let me see you walk away.
1021
00:50:57,867 --> 00:50:58,965
I'm gonna get so ready.
1022
00:50:58,967 --> 00:51:00,498
- Whoo!
- Oh, shit! Oh, damn!
1023
00:51:00,500 --> 00:51:01,967
She could be the one!
1024
00:51:01,969 --> 00:51:05,999
Oh, shit! You into
that African freaky shit.
1025
00:51:06,001 --> 00:51:08,600
♪ Ooh, I've been waiting, Lord ♪
1026
00:51:38,670 --> 00:51:41,369
Oh. What kind of music is that?
1027
00:51:41,371 --> 00:51:45,971
Mm, I really love your artwork.
You're very cultured.
1028
00:51:45,973 --> 00:51:48,102
Are you ready? Here I come.
1029
00:51:48,104 --> 00:51:51,336
Why are you so quiet?
1030
00:51:54,906 --> 00:51:56,804
Before we begin,
we should agree on a safe word.
1031
00:51:56,806 --> 00:51:58,538
- What the fuck?
- No, no.
1032
00:51:58,540 --> 00:52:00,470
"What the fuck" won't work.
Something more specific.
1033
00:52:00,472 --> 00:52:02,805
Yeah, you know what?
I think I left my kid in the back seat.
1034
00:52:02,807 --> 00:52:04,004
But you stay right there.
1035
00:52:04,006 --> 00:52:05,872
- Hey! Come on!
- No, no, no!
1036
00:52:05,874 --> 00:52:08,072
I thought
you were the real deal!
1037
00:52:08,074 --> 00:52:11,306
Jamal Barry.
Now, you are the real deal.
1038
00:52:11,308 --> 00:52:14,472
And on behalf of
the entire Summit team,
1039
00:52:14,474 --> 00:52:19,273
I want to thank you for taking your
time to hear our presentation today.
1040
00:52:19,275 --> 00:52:22,373
All right, so I'ma bounce pass
this over to my man Kevin Myrtle.
1041
00:52:22,375 --> 00:52:24,038
And he'll take it from here.
1042
00:52:24,040 --> 00:52:26,207
- You're in good hands.
- Okay, take it away.
1043
00:52:26,209 --> 00:52:28,839
This agency represents the
biggest athletes in the world,
1044
00:52:28,841 --> 00:52:32,307
but we here believe
that you can surpass them all
1045
00:52:32,309 --> 00:52:36,107
with your skills,
your confidence, your charisma.
1046
00:52:36,109 --> 00:52:37,605
We see you
1047
00:52:37,607 --> 00:52:41,172
as the athlete that every kid
is gonna want to grow up to be.
1048
00:52:41,174 --> 00:52:43,005
Now, this is just
a little teaser
1049
00:52:43,007 --> 00:52:46,206
of the coming attractions
for Jamal Barry's future.
1050
00:52:47,908 --> 00:52:49,572
♪ No cap, no cap ♪
1051
00:52:49,574 --> 00:52:51,406
♪ I see you motherfuckers
Wanna talk ♪
1052
00:52:51,408 --> 00:52:53,473
♪ About Jamal this
And Jamal that ♪
1053
00:52:53,475 --> 00:52:55,307
♪ But we balls to the wall
Motherfucker! ♪
1054
00:52:55,309 --> 00:52:58,008
♪ Y'all like small balls
I'm that big dog ♪
1055
00:52:58,010 --> 00:53:00,340
♪ I'm like Shaq D on Adderall
That's how I ball ♪
1056
00:53:00,342 --> 00:53:01,907
♪ See that private jet
That model chick ♪
1057
00:53:01,909 --> 00:53:03,609
♪ That's how I ball ♪
1058
00:53:03,611 --> 00:53:05,007
♪ See, she like it raw
She like it raw ♪
1059
00:53:05,009 --> 00:53:07,240
♪ That's how I ball ♪
1060
00:53:07,242 --> 00:53:09,408
♪ They try to put the head
On my salary I still ball ♪
1061
00:53:09,410 --> 00:53:11,207
♪ Respect the name Jamal
I come from Joe Barry's balls ♪
1062
00:53:11,209 --> 00:53:12,741
♪ If we can't talk at all ♪
1063
00:53:12,743 --> 00:53:14,241
♪ Then we can't talk at all ♪
1064
00:53:14,243 --> 00:53:16,674
♪ How I ball
How I ball ♪
1065
00:53:19,711 --> 00:53:21,209
♪ How I ball ♪
1066
00:53:21,211 --> 00:53:23,276
♪ And can't nobody ball
Like Jamal ♪
1067
00:53:23,278 --> 00:53:25,275
♪ And bitches love balls ♪
1068
00:53:26,177 --> 00:53:28,275
♪ Especially Jamal's balls ♪
1069
00:53:29,346 --> 00:53:32,544
♪ No cap, there's no cap
Yeah, there's no cap ♪
1070
00:53:32,546 --> 00:53:33,843
Okay...
1071
00:53:34,345 --> 00:53:36,942
♪ Yeah, there's no cap
Yeah, there's no cap ♪
1072
00:53:42,145 --> 00:53:44,411
Nice.
1073
00:53:44,413 --> 00:53:45,745
Whoo!
1074
00:53:49,912 --> 00:53:51,843
Baller video, Kev.
1075
00:53:52,615 --> 00:53:54,411
Now, look, I...
1076
00:53:54,413 --> 00:53:56,877
That is a rough edit of, you
know, what we're feeling here.
1077
00:53:56,879 --> 00:54:01,245
Ten percent for this reject
'90s Diddy video? Hell, no!
1078
00:54:01,247 --> 00:54:02,946
Man, get me out of here.
1079
00:54:02,948 --> 00:54:05,213
I just want to play some pickup
at Wabash Park.
1080
00:54:05,215 --> 00:54:08,545
Oh, please, please,
gentlemen, please.
1081
00:54:08,547 --> 00:54:11,212
I think I know
what's on everybody's mind here.
1082
00:54:11,981 --> 00:54:14,079
You're not going with Summit.
1083
00:54:14,847 --> 00:54:16,281
And why should you?
1084
00:54:16,283 --> 00:54:20,313
That cheap '90s rap video
is not who you are.
1085
00:54:20,315 --> 00:54:21,612
That's right.
1086
00:54:21,983 --> 00:54:25,247
'Cause this boy's body
is a Shinto shrine, okay?
1087
00:54:25,249 --> 00:54:29,047
Every breakfast he ever has is
made with my patented smoothie.
1088
00:54:29,049 --> 00:54:31,248
Oh, man, not the smoothie rant.
1089
00:54:31,250 --> 00:54:36,549
We're talking about kale, chia
seed, coconut juice, avocados.
1090
00:54:36,551 --> 00:54:39,248
You know how many avocados
is in this boy's body?
1091
00:54:39,250 --> 00:54:40,882
Look at his legs!
1092
00:54:40,884 --> 00:54:43,316
On top of that,
fish oils, mega-nines,
1093
00:54:43,318 --> 00:54:45,117
sometimes fives and sixes.
1094
00:54:45,119 --> 00:54:46,849
- Omega.
- Depends on what I have.
1095
00:54:46,851 --> 00:54:49,315
Pumpkin seeds, sunflower seeds.
1096
00:54:49,317 --> 00:54:52,147
- Some pistachios sometimes go in there.
- Okay.
1097
00:54:52,149 --> 00:54:54,013
- Whatever it is...
- Sounds healthy.
1098
00:54:54,015 --> 00:54:55,513
No, wait a minute!
1099
00:54:55,515 --> 00:54:58,182
I put more stuff in it.
Sometimes I add cherries.
1100
00:54:58,184 --> 00:55:00,447
A little soy sauce,
some duck sauce.
1101
00:55:00,449 --> 00:55:03,349
Okay, then I add more chia seed
on top of that!
1102
00:55:03,351 --> 00:55:05,248
I care about this here boy.
1103
00:55:05,716 --> 00:55:08,149
Okay, Joe...
1104
00:55:08,151 --> 00:55:12,648
You could hire a freelance agent
and pay only five percent,
1105
00:55:12,650 --> 00:55:16,117
but you would be missing out on what
a full-service agency has to offer.
1106
00:55:16,119 --> 00:55:18,883
Besides what, free Fiji water
and a sizzle reel?
1107
00:55:18,885 --> 00:55:22,917
Look, building a billion-dollar brand
goes beyond cutting costs. Okay?
1108
00:55:22,919 --> 00:55:26,851
It's about developing relationships
with leading sponsors.
1109
00:55:26,853 --> 00:55:29,583
Knowing who delivers
and who's all hype.
1110
00:55:29,585 --> 00:55:32,951
It's installing protections
to keep your money
1111
00:55:32,953 --> 00:55:34,884
through injuries, trades.
1112
00:55:34,886 --> 00:55:37,452
Look... It's...
1113
00:55:37,454 --> 00:55:41,552
It's not really about
our vision for you at all.
1114
00:55:41,554 --> 00:55:44,318
It's about
what's in your mind, Jamal.
1115
00:55:45,288 --> 00:55:46,051
Right on.
1116
00:55:46,053 --> 00:55:47,686
That all sounds great,
1117
00:55:47,688 --> 00:55:50,153
but what I really could use
right now is a cup of coffee.
1118
00:55:51,121 --> 00:55:56,286
Even... if it's as simple
as a cup of coffee.
1119
00:56:00,622 --> 00:56:01,519
Damn.
1120
00:56:02,289 --> 00:56:04,988
- How'd you know that?
- Just doing my job.
1121
00:56:04,990 --> 00:56:07,253
Okay, now she's pissing me off.
1122
00:56:07,255 --> 00:56:08,487
What the fuck
just happened?
1123
00:56:08,489 --> 00:56:10,021
I thought
that video was awesome.
1124
00:56:11,823 --> 00:56:13,220
You know what?
To be honest,
1125
00:56:13,222 --> 00:56:15,754
I never considered
a female agent until now.
1126
00:56:15,756 --> 00:56:18,554
Until Branch Rickey took a
chance on Jackie Robinson,
1127
00:56:18,556 --> 00:56:21,722
no one ever considered a colored
baseball player in the majors.
1128
00:56:21,724 --> 00:56:24,622
Well,
Branch Rickey was the mahatma.
1129
00:56:24,624 --> 00:56:28,055
- Mm-hmm.
- Only white man deserving of sainthood.
1130
00:56:28,057 --> 00:56:30,456
- Abraham Lincoln, Pop.
- But he was part Eskimo.
1131
00:56:30,458 --> 00:56:32,222
Mr. Barry's car is at the valet.
1132
00:56:32,224 --> 00:56:33,688
Thank you, Brandon.
And you know what?
1133
00:56:33,690 --> 00:56:35,888
I would love to finish
this conversation.
1134
00:56:35,890 --> 00:56:37,422
How about I invite you
to the Hawks game?
1135
00:56:37,424 --> 00:56:39,323
Sunday afternoon?
We have a sky suite.
1136
00:56:39,325 --> 00:56:42,189
- Skybox... Fuck yes!
- Can't do it. Not gonna happen.
1137
00:56:42,191 --> 00:56:44,423
- That's family day. You understand?
- Oh.
1138
00:56:44,425 --> 00:56:47,256
Hey, Sly and the Family Stone
could be coming out of seclusion.
1139
00:56:47,258 --> 00:56:49,590
I mean, it could be an asteroid
coming towards Earth.
1140
00:56:49,592 --> 00:56:50,857
"Oh, no, no!"
1141
00:56:50,859 --> 00:56:52,257
Not gonna happen,
you understand?
1142
00:56:52,259 --> 00:56:53,823
- 'Cause we lock it down.
- Damn.
1143
00:56:53,825 --> 00:56:56,057
But you know something,
you wouldn't understand that,
1144
00:56:56,059 --> 00:56:57,757
'cause you're not,
like, a family woman.
1145
00:56:58,593 --> 00:57:00,724
What makes you think
I'm not a family woman?
1146
00:57:00,726 --> 00:57:02,257
Whoo, whoo, whoo!
1147
00:57:02,259 --> 00:57:04,558
No disrespect.
I mean, you doing you.
1148
00:57:04,560 --> 00:57:06,459
But this is a different set
of values right here.
1149
00:57:06,461 --> 00:57:08,357
You know,
we all about the roots.
1150
00:57:08,359 --> 00:57:10,522
- So this is about the roots, it's deep.
- Roots.
1151
00:57:10,524 --> 00:57:12,221
I don't trust a woman
with no family.
1152
00:57:12,625 --> 00:57:16,056
Like I don't trust a man with
no eyebrows and too many keys.
1153
00:57:23,394 --> 00:57:27,759
As a matter of fact,
I will bring my family.
1154
00:57:28,228 --> 00:57:29,857
There they are, right there.
1155
00:57:29,859 --> 00:57:32,759
There, both of them, the big one
and the little. Hey, Will!
1156
00:57:32,761 --> 00:57:35,060
Hey! Hey! Will! Will!
1157
00:57:35,062 --> 00:57:36,524
Come over here.
1158
00:57:36,526 --> 00:57:38,459
Uh, who are they?
1159
00:57:38,461 --> 00:57:41,126
- This is your husband?
- Ah, the man put a ring on it.
1160
00:57:41,128 --> 00:57:44,259
Oh, yeah! Did you want me to
have your family wait upstairs?
1161
00:57:44,261 --> 00:57:45,560
No, I need you to roll calls.
1162
00:57:45,562 --> 00:57:47,760
- Roll calls, Brandon.
- Okay.
1163
00:57:47,762 --> 00:57:50,193
Hey! Hey.
1164
00:57:50,195 --> 00:57:51,693
- Hey.
- Hey.
1165
00:57:51,695 --> 00:57:53,828
Oh, now she's smiling?
Clearly crazy.
1166
00:57:53,830 --> 00:57:55,159
Who the fuck are they?
1167
00:57:56,261 --> 00:57:58,395
Um, Will, this is Jamal Barry
1168
00:57:58,397 --> 00:58:00,194
and his dad, Joe Dolla.
1169
00:58:00,196 --> 00:58:01,461
That's Ben.
1170
00:58:01,463 --> 00:58:03,260
Holy shit, it is.
1171
00:58:03,262 --> 00:58:04,928
- Wassup, man?
- What's goin' on, brother?
1172
00:58:05,397 --> 00:58:07,228
Yeah, bring it on in here,
playa!
1173
00:58:07,563 --> 00:58:10,161
Right on.
That's a live one on your hands.
1174
00:58:10,163 --> 00:58:11,794
Oh, yes, I'm alive.
1175
00:58:11,796 --> 00:58:14,128
You talking about him?
1176
00:58:14,763 --> 00:58:16,162
You got me!
1177
00:58:16,164 --> 00:58:18,630
He's a funny fella.
This guy's a prankster.
1178
00:58:18,632 --> 00:58:19,695
He is.
1179
00:58:20,163 --> 00:58:21,528
Ow.
1180
00:58:21,530 --> 00:58:23,463
I dig this here,
but you know what?
1181
00:58:23,465 --> 00:58:25,163
I'ma let y'all have
your family time.
1182
00:58:25,165 --> 00:58:27,029
Girl, you look like
you spit this little boy out.
1183
00:58:27,031 --> 00:58:28,497
"Family time"?
1184
00:58:28,499 --> 00:58:30,296
You look
just like your mother, boy.
1185
00:58:30,298 --> 00:58:32,195
Okay, I'll talk to you later.
All right! Yes.
1186
00:58:32,599 --> 00:58:34,530
So, hey,
what are you guys doing here?
1187
00:58:35,132 --> 00:58:37,397
Go ahead, do your thing.
Show her.
1188
00:58:37,399 --> 00:58:41,332
Sorry. I found your license
on the floor in my dad's room.
1189
00:58:41,334 --> 00:58:44,898
And I'm also sorry for wearing
your underwear on my head.
1190
00:58:44,900 --> 00:58:47,264
Okay. Thank you. Um...
1191
00:58:47,468 --> 00:58:49,065
And, you know,
I should probably apologize
1192
00:58:49,067 --> 00:58:50,998
for leaving your house
in such a frenzy, I just...
1193
00:58:51,301 --> 00:58:53,332
I can be short with people
sometimes.
1194
00:58:53,733 --> 00:58:55,898
I'm sure you probably thought
I was crazy.
1195
00:58:56,434 --> 00:58:59,865
Crazy people don't think
they're crazy, so maybe she's not.
1196
00:59:00,534 --> 00:59:02,934
- Mm-hmm.
- Can you try to be nice to my dad?
1197
00:59:02,936 --> 00:59:05,698
Ever since Mom died,
Dad's been very lonely.
1198
00:59:05,700 --> 00:59:08,834
- What?
- Whoa, whoa, hey, hey. It's okay, buddy.
1199
00:59:08,836 --> 00:59:10,966
Why didn't you say that to me
in the beginning?
1200
00:59:11,202 --> 00:59:13,367
Well, I was gonna tell you
that morning,
1201
00:59:13,369 --> 00:59:15,634
but you ran out so fast, you...
1202
00:59:16,302 --> 00:59:17,933
You know, I'm...
I'm sorry about...
1203
00:59:17,935 --> 00:59:19,901
Wait,
why am I apologizing to her?
1204
00:59:19,903 --> 00:59:21,468
I didn't do nothing wrong.
1205
00:59:21,470 --> 00:59:23,132
You know what?
Why don't I make it up to both of you
1206
00:59:23,134 --> 00:59:26,400
and invite you to the Hawks
and Timberwolves game on Sunday?
1207
00:59:26,402 --> 00:59:27,733
We have a skybox.
1208
00:59:27,735 --> 00:59:31,198
Karl-Anthony Towns? Skybox!
1209
00:59:31,636 --> 00:59:33,034
- You serious?
- Yes.
1210
00:59:33,335 --> 00:59:35,566
Well, yeah.
Yeah, that'd be nice.
1211
00:59:35,568 --> 00:59:38,500
- Okay, well, I'll see you Sunday. Great.
- All right, cool, cool.
1212
00:59:47,535 --> 00:59:49,533
- Can I talk to you for a second?
- Mm-hmm.
1213
00:59:54,237 --> 00:59:56,835
Hey, that was supposed to be
a team presentation,
1214
00:59:56,837 --> 00:59:59,369
not some bullshit
"You go, girl" moment.
1215
00:59:59,371 --> 01:00:01,301
The only bullshit in that room
1216
01:00:01,303 --> 01:00:04,037
was that racist Lifestyle
of the Rich and Clueless shit!
1217
01:00:04,039 --> 01:00:06,003
Ball-busting bitch!
1218
01:00:07,105 --> 01:00:08,570
Well, if Team Bro
1219
01:00:08,572 --> 01:00:10,737
would listen to a sister
every once in a while,
1220
01:00:10,739 --> 01:00:13,102
maybe I wouldn't have to be
a ball-busting bitch.
1221
01:00:13,104 --> 01:00:14,303
I did not say that.
1222
01:00:14,305 --> 01:00:15,671
Shit, did I?
1223
01:00:15,673 --> 01:00:17,370
If you didn't, you thought it.
1224
01:00:17,706 --> 01:00:19,771
Stop moving the car.
1225
01:00:21,173 --> 01:00:23,571
Stop moving the fucking car.
1226
01:00:24,107 --> 01:00:27,071
I know it was you
who voted me down from partner.
1227
01:00:27,073 --> 01:00:30,472
What? I voted to make you
partner every single time,
1228
01:00:30,474 --> 01:00:32,671
and please stop moving
the fucking car!
1229
01:00:32,673 --> 01:00:34,905
Maybe I shouldn't have.
You're crazy as fuck.
1230
01:00:35,273 --> 01:00:36,404
Wait.
1231
01:00:37,875 --> 01:00:39,239
You really voted for me?
1232
01:00:39,241 --> 01:00:42,171
Yes! This is a business.
I'm a numbers guy.
1233
01:00:42,173 --> 01:00:43,805
You get the numbers.
End of story.
1234
01:00:43,807 --> 01:00:46,573
All right, so if it wasn't you,
then who was it?
1235
01:00:46,575 --> 01:00:48,273
I don't know.
It could've been anyone!
1236
01:00:48,275 --> 01:00:49,940
It's not like you have
a lot of friends here.
1237
01:00:49,942 --> 01:00:52,040
You're constantly
throwing the first punch,
1238
01:00:52,042 --> 01:00:54,171
and you got you and no one else.
1239
01:00:55,908 --> 01:00:58,640
That's bullshit.
That's bullshit.
1240
01:00:58,642 --> 01:01:01,641
Because if I were a man,
people would say I play hard.
1241
01:01:01,643 --> 01:01:04,775
If you were a man,
people would say that you were a dick.
1242
01:01:07,944 --> 01:01:09,442
Well, thanks for the talk.
1243
01:01:09,444 --> 01:01:12,609
It's always nice for a woman
to be called a dick.
1244
01:01:14,610 --> 01:01:15,508
Wha...
1245
01:01:15,510 --> 01:01:17,309
I did not say that.
1246
01:01:17,311 --> 01:01:20,676
No more dating strippers
unless Fantasia calls me back.
1247
01:01:20,678 --> 01:01:22,908
I'm getting fat.
Like, Rerun fat.
1248
01:01:22,910 --> 01:01:25,675
Hey, Ali. I heard you crushed
your Jamal Barry meeting. Nice.
1249
01:01:25,677 --> 01:01:27,376
I'm so hot for you!
1250
01:01:27,378 --> 01:01:28,577
I wish I could
scream it out loud,
1251
01:01:28,579 --> 01:01:30,009
but no one would understand.
1252
01:01:30,011 --> 01:01:31,844
Oh, Danny, thank you.
You're so sweet.
1253
01:01:31,846 --> 01:01:33,543
Don't think I don't see
that big-ass dick
1254
01:01:33,545 --> 01:01:35,243
trying to bust
through those pants.
1255
01:01:35,977 --> 01:01:36,909
What did you say?
1256
01:01:38,343 --> 01:01:39,775
We didn't say anything.
1257
01:01:40,144 --> 01:01:42,108
I'm gonna, uh...
go back to my desk.
1258
01:01:42,110 --> 01:01:44,308
Um, I'll see you two later.
1259
01:01:45,478 --> 01:01:47,508
You and me, Brandon, someday.
1260
01:02:03,713 --> 01:02:07,443
So, Nick, what'd Ali mention
about five-percent commission?
1261
01:02:07,445 --> 01:02:09,478
Five-percent commission.
She's hilarious.
1262
01:02:09,480 --> 01:02:10,844
Would you excuse me a second?
1263
01:02:12,779 --> 01:02:15,245
So when is this fabulous
fake family gonna show?
1264
01:02:15,247 --> 01:02:16,745
They will be here.
1265
01:02:16,747 --> 01:02:19,077
Well, the Barry Bunch
keep asking for him.
1266
01:02:19,545 --> 01:02:22,277
- Hey.
- Hey!
1267
01:02:22,882 --> 01:02:25,344
- Hey, sorry we're late.
- I know, honey.
1268
01:02:25,346 --> 01:02:27,011
You had a rough day.
1269
01:02:27,247 --> 01:02:30,278
And you, you little... thing.
1270
01:02:31,414 --> 01:02:32,645
Go.
1271
01:02:33,414 --> 01:02:34,746
Hey, yo, Ali!
1272
01:02:35,081 --> 01:02:38,179
I have a monumentally
important question to ask you.
1273
01:02:38,181 --> 01:02:40,346
- Okay.
- Do you trust Elon Musk?
1274
01:02:40,348 --> 01:02:43,080
'Cause that man is one white
glove and metal hand away
1275
01:02:43,082 --> 01:02:45,013
from being a James Bond villain.
1276
01:02:45,015 --> 01:02:46,481
Freaky.
1277
01:02:46,483 --> 01:02:47,748
Hey, thanks again
for inviting us, Ali.
1278
01:02:47,750 --> 01:02:49,248
- Okay, yes.
- Appreciate you.
1279
01:02:49,250 --> 01:02:51,014
- Wassup, Will?
- Wassup, Jamal?
1280
01:02:51,016 --> 01:02:52,882
- What's going on, man?
- Hey, man. You good?
1281
01:02:52,884 --> 01:02:55,015
- Yes, sir.
- Yeah, yeah, I'm... I'm... I'm good.
1282
01:02:55,017 --> 01:02:57,749
Holy shit, Jamal Barry
remembered my name!
1283
01:02:57,751 --> 01:02:59,480
That skank is a ho.
1284
01:03:00,150 --> 01:03:01,949
Ali Cat and Will of the People,
1285
01:03:01,951 --> 01:03:04,949
that is my baby girl,
my wife. Loretta!
1286
01:03:04,951 --> 01:03:07,683
I know, bitch is always talking
shit about other people.
1287
01:03:07,685 --> 01:03:10,316
Her nappy weave
is some virgin hair from Peru.
1288
01:03:10,318 --> 01:03:13,282
- I'm fine.
- Baby, will you please get off the phone?
1289
01:03:13,284 --> 01:03:14,916
You said this was family day.
1290
01:03:14,918 --> 01:03:16,717
I know.
I'm talking to my mother.
1291
01:03:16,719 --> 01:03:18,082
Oh, I didn't know.
1292
01:03:18,585 --> 01:03:20,183
Look, Ma, I got to go.
1293
01:03:20,185 --> 01:03:21,850
If she botches this,
she is fired.
1294
01:03:21,852 --> 01:03:23,651
And, baby, this is Ali.
1295
01:03:23,653 --> 01:03:25,450
She's the one I demolished
in poker night.
1296
01:03:25,452 --> 01:03:27,383
- Mm.
- I brought out the alpha dogs.
1297
01:03:27,720 --> 01:03:31,384
Is that the same alpha dog who was
supposed to get me a pinot grigio?
1298
01:03:31,386 --> 01:03:32,951
You know,
I tell you what, Mrs. Barry,
1299
01:03:32,953 --> 01:03:34,717
why don't I step out
to the main bar with you
1300
01:03:34,719 --> 01:03:36,952
and then I can get
some Mama Jamal stories, huh?
1301
01:03:36,954 --> 01:03:38,984
- Hey, bubby, don't be long!
- Mm-hmm.
1302
01:03:38,986 --> 01:03:40,385
You're my oxygen!
1303
01:03:43,054 --> 01:03:45,552
Now, this is the court
I want to play on.
1304
01:03:48,687 --> 01:03:50,153
- Ben, come here.
- Ben, come here.
1305
01:03:50,555 --> 01:03:52,820
- Ben, come here.
- Ben-Ben, come here. Here, now.
1306
01:03:53,219 --> 01:03:55,750
- Ben. Ben-ben, come here.
- No, Ben. Come, come, come...
1307
01:03:56,487 --> 01:03:57,851
- Ben, Ben, come here.
- Ben, come here.
1308
01:03:57,853 --> 01:04:00,050
- Ben, Ben.
- Ben.
1309
01:04:00,386 --> 01:04:01,584
- Ben.
- Ben. Come...
1310
01:04:01,986 --> 01:04:03,784
- Ben, come here.
- Ben, Ben, come here.
1311
01:04:04,055 --> 01:04:07,351
Wow! Y'all are cute, man.
Y'all so cute!
1312
01:04:07,353 --> 01:04:10,052
Ahh!
1313
01:04:10,054 --> 01:04:12,386
Like peanut butter and jelly
and pickled herring,
1314
01:04:12,388 --> 01:04:13,819
you know,
but you got arms and legs.
1315
01:04:14,122 --> 01:04:16,720
- That's so us.
- How did y'all meet?
1316
01:04:16,955 --> 01:04:18,918
- Uh... I'll take it! We...
- Well, I...
1317
01:04:19,854 --> 01:04:22,086
Uh, well,
it's kind of embarrassing.
1318
01:04:22,556 --> 01:04:24,120
It was a one-night stand.
1319
01:04:24,390 --> 01:04:26,853
Wow, nice! Yeah, nice.
1320
01:04:26,855 --> 01:04:30,053
Hey, ain't nothing wrong with a little
bit of shame in the Walk of Shame.
1321
01:04:30,055 --> 01:04:32,021
You know what I'm saying?
That's a paradox.
1322
01:04:32,023 --> 01:04:33,988
But now y'all can enjoy
your fruits of y'all labor,
1323
01:04:33,990 --> 01:04:36,221
'cause that's what it's about!
You know, 'cause...
1324
01:04:36,223 --> 01:04:38,688
What in the fuck
is he talking about?
1325
01:04:38,690 --> 01:04:40,154
Fruits, he's...
1326
01:04:40,156 --> 01:04:42,022
Little man! You planning
being a baller someday?
1327
01:04:42,024 --> 01:04:43,287
Oh, yes! Ben...
1328
01:04:43,289 --> 01:04:45,254
Big Ben loves basketball.
Isn't that right, Ben?
1329
01:04:45,256 --> 01:04:47,788
I don't... I don't really...
I don't really think so.
1330
01:04:47,790 --> 01:04:49,322
Actually, no. You know...
1331
01:04:49,324 --> 01:04:51,222
He finds the craziest stuff
on the Internet.
1332
01:04:51,224 --> 01:04:53,090
- Yes, he does.
- I got to limit his screen time.
1333
01:04:53,092 --> 01:04:55,122
You know? Because me,
you know, I'm a single...
1334
01:04:55,124 --> 01:04:57,723
- Uh, you know what?
- I am... parched.
1335
01:04:57,725 --> 01:04:59,655
Can you please get me
some wine, baby?
1336
01:04:59,925 --> 01:05:01,923
Yeah, yeah. What do you want?
They got red, white...
1337
01:05:01,925 --> 01:05:04,124
It doesn't matter. Surprise me.
1338
01:05:04,126 --> 01:05:06,491
- Go get some. Just go get me some.
- Ali.
1339
01:05:06,493 --> 01:05:08,158
Ah, you know me.
1340
01:05:08,160 --> 01:05:09,191
Get me some!
1341
01:05:09,692 --> 01:05:11,024
- Surprise me!
- You've got a strong hand.
1342
01:05:11,026 --> 01:05:12,990
- Oh, you so crazy!
- It's strong.
1343
01:05:12,992 --> 01:05:14,925
- He's silly.
- He don't know your wine preference?
1344
01:05:14,927 --> 01:05:17,123
Oh, he does.
We just like surprises, that's all.
1345
01:05:17,125 --> 01:05:19,890
Guess what?
My birthday's next week.
1346
01:05:20,259 --> 01:05:22,190
Ooh! How old you gonna be?
1347
01:05:23,226 --> 01:05:24,258
Tell him, Ben.
1348
01:05:24,260 --> 01:05:25,358
Six.
1349
01:05:25,360 --> 01:05:26,725
Six.
1350
01:05:26,727 --> 01:05:28,059
You gonna blow it out,
little man?
1351
01:05:28,061 --> 01:05:29,891
Yes!
We're gonna do it really big.
1352
01:05:29,893 --> 01:05:32,159
We're gonna do big things
for his birthday. Right, Ben?
1353
01:05:32,161 --> 01:05:34,926
- You are?
- Yeah! Really big.
1354
01:05:35,128 --> 01:05:38,626
If we're talking blowout,
what I really wanted is
1355
01:05:38,628 --> 01:05:40,725
a cake shaped like a sports car.
1356
01:05:40,727 --> 01:05:43,992
Oh, you got it, Ben! You got it.
1357
01:05:43,994 --> 01:05:44,960
Promise?
1358
01:05:45,195 --> 01:05:46,559
Yes, I promise.
1359
01:05:46,561 --> 01:05:48,492
What... Wait, wait...
Oh!
1360
01:05:49,495 --> 01:05:51,426
That's a beautiful thing, girl.
1361
01:05:51,729 --> 01:05:52,727
Ooh-hoo-hoo.
1362
01:05:54,096 --> 01:05:57,695
Well, thank you so much for coming.
I hope you had a good time.
1363
01:05:57,697 --> 01:05:59,861
Oh, no. We had an amazing time.
Thank you.
1364
01:05:59,863 --> 01:06:02,394
Hey, um, how about tomorrow
night I'll take you out?
1365
01:06:02,897 --> 01:06:05,827
But we gonna do something a little
bit more low-key than, uh...
1366
01:06:05,829 --> 01:06:08,293
- Oh, yeah, sure! Sure.
- Yeah, okay.
1367
01:06:08,295 --> 01:06:10,528
Okay, well, you go ahead home.
1368
01:06:10,530 --> 01:06:12,826
- Oh, hey!
- Wha... What...
1369
01:06:12,828 --> 01:06:14,960
- Good night! Good night. Ohh!
- Uh, okay...
1370
01:06:14,962 --> 01:06:16,995
Make sure you put him into bed.
I'll see you soon.
1371
01:06:16,997 --> 01:06:18,827
- I got it, I got it.
- All right, okay.
1372
01:06:18,829 --> 01:06:21,927
This boy get up and he drink
smoothies 16 times a day.
1373
01:06:21,929 --> 01:06:24,161
Sometimes he get the runs,
but it's all good.
1374
01:06:24,163 --> 01:06:26,029
That's only
when his mother make it.
1375
01:06:26,031 --> 01:06:28,129
You know what I'm saying?
'Cause she just overloads.
1376
01:06:28,131 --> 01:06:29,126
Ali?
1377
01:06:29,630 --> 01:06:31,327
Karl-Anthony!
1378
01:06:31,329 --> 01:06:33,461
- How you doing, sweetheart?
- Great game, baby!
1379
01:06:33,463 --> 01:06:35,429
Triple double and we didn't win.
So, it don't mean shit.
1380
01:06:35,431 --> 01:06:37,295
- You know how that go.
- Those numbers, though.
1381
01:06:37,297 --> 01:06:39,828
You keep putting those numbers up.
Hey, Jamal!
1382
01:06:39,830 --> 01:06:41,294
Come here, I got somebody
I want you to meet.
1383
01:06:41,296 --> 01:06:43,662
- Oh, that's your mans?
- Well, I'm working on it.
1384
01:06:43,664 --> 01:06:45,796
- I feels you.
- Holy shit! Don't freak out.
1385
01:06:45,798 --> 01:06:47,630
It's Karl-Anthony!
Yo, he's looking at me!
1386
01:06:47,632 --> 01:06:48,597
Yo, Jamal Barry, right?
1387
01:06:49,099 --> 01:06:51,097
- Yes, sir. Yep.
- Appreciate it, man. Much love.
1388
01:06:51,099 --> 01:06:52,931
- Nice to meet you.
- Absolutely. Absolutely.
1389
01:06:52,933 --> 01:06:55,930
Holy shit!
Uh, hey, hey, don't freak out.
1390
01:06:55,932 --> 01:06:58,163
Yo, I've been watching you
since high school, man.
1391
01:06:58,165 --> 01:07:00,295
I must say, young fella,
I'm pretty impressed.
1392
01:07:00,532 --> 01:07:02,831
- Oh, for real?
- Yeah, man, you're killing it.
1393
01:07:02,833 --> 01:07:05,330
- Cool. Yeah, yeah, that's cool.
- Kid's nervous.
1394
01:07:05,332 --> 01:07:08,165
Probably thinking, "Holy shit,
it's Karl-Anthony Towns!"
1395
01:07:08,167 --> 01:07:10,997
Holy shit,
it's Karl-Anthony Towns!
1396
01:07:10,999 --> 01:07:14,465
Karl-Anthony, do you have any
advice for our young fella here?
1397
01:07:14,467 --> 01:07:16,332
Listen, man, for real,
1398
01:07:16,334 --> 01:07:18,799
you got great things ahead of
you, but always remember,
1399
01:07:19,035 --> 01:07:21,667
no one has ever become a star
playing for himself.
1400
01:07:21,669 --> 01:07:23,133
Always got to keep
the team first.
1401
01:07:23,135 --> 01:07:26,166
♪ If you like piña coladas ♪
1402
01:07:26,168 --> 01:07:28,334
♪ And getting caught
In the rain ♪
1403
01:07:28,336 --> 01:07:31,034
Damn! Got to get that
stupid song out of my head.
1404
01:07:31,036 --> 01:07:32,567
- You feel me?
- Totally.
1405
01:07:32,569 --> 01:07:34,734
I have no idea
what he just said.
1406
01:07:35,301 --> 01:07:38,033
- Oh, shit. I'll see you.
- Yo, Karl!
1407
01:07:38,403 --> 01:07:40,301
Hey, Karl! Hey, Karl!
1408
01:07:40,303 --> 01:07:43,834
Hey, I got a way to disrupt
the children's beverage sector!
1409
01:07:44,136 --> 01:07:45,667
That was a great game, right?
1410
01:07:46,170 --> 01:07:49,134
Well, just give me a call
if you need anything else, okay?
1411
01:07:49,136 --> 01:07:51,636
As a matter of fact,
there is something I need.
1412
01:07:51,638 --> 01:07:54,702
Can I get a ballpark estimate
of what kind of deals we expect?
1413
01:07:54,704 --> 01:07:57,103
You know what I'm saying?
Just for financial planning purposes.
1414
01:07:57,105 --> 01:08:01,569
Pops, you can't ask her to do work for
us if you haven't signed with her agency.
1415
01:08:01,571 --> 01:08:03,469
Yeah, but if I like what I hear,
1416
01:08:03,471 --> 01:08:05,735
we can say we got ourselves an agent.
1417
01:08:09,938 --> 01:08:12,536
Brandon! Can you get me
some coffee, please? Thank you.
1418
01:08:12,538 --> 01:08:14,937
Peach cobbler,
peach cobbler, peach cobbler.
1419
01:08:14,939 --> 01:08:17,037
Peach cobbler with blueberries.
1420
01:08:17,039 --> 01:08:19,204
Peach cobbler warmed up.
Peach cobbler.
1421
01:08:19,206 --> 01:08:21,070
- What are you mumbling about?
- Peach cobbler à la mode.
1422
01:08:21,072 --> 01:08:23,402
I am thinking about
my favorite dessert
1423
01:08:23,404 --> 01:08:25,636
so that you can't hear
my actual thoughts.
1424
01:08:25,638 --> 01:08:28,270
Oh, no, no, no.
Out with it. Come, come.
1425
01:08:28,272 --> 01:08:30,202
I believe
you are a good person.
1426
01:08:30,204 --> 01:08:32,637
So, I am choosing to chalk
this fake-family business
1427
01:08:32,639 --> 01:08:35,070
up to an overabundance
of competitive spirit.
1428
01:08:35,072 --> 01:08:37,170
- Give me my coffee.
- There, I said it.
1429
01:08:38,572 --> 01:08:40,505
- Please.
- Oh, speak of the devil,
1430
01:08:40,507 --> 01:08:42,537
here is your fake husband now.
1431
01:08:42,972 --> 01:08:45,637
Aw, Will is inviting you
to hang out tonight.
1432
01:08:45,639 --> 01:08:47,038
No.
1433
01:08:47,040 --> 01:08:49,703
- "That sounds like fun."
- What are you doing?
1434
01:08:49,705 --> 01:08:51,904
- "Let's do it."
- Uh, no.
1435
01:08:51,906 --> 01:08:53,037
Can you stop typing?
1436
01:08:53,039 --> 01:08:54,470
I'm not going on a date tonight!
1437
01:08:54,973 --> 01:08:59,138
"Any way I could bring
my friend Mari..."
1438
01:08:59,140 --> 01:09:01,173
- Wha...
- "...and her fiancé?
1439
01:09:01,175 --> 01:09:04,372
Just realized we had plans.
Could be a fun double date."
1440
01:09:04,374 --> 01:09:05,772
- Exclamation point.
- No, no!
1441
01:09:05,774 --> 01:09:06,972
- We do not...
- Send.
1442
01:09:06,974 --> 01:09:08,539
I don't have plans with her.
1443
01:09:08,541 --> 01:09:10,172
Come here, you little...
1444
01:09:11,241 --> 01:09:12,974
I don't have plans with Mari.
1445
01:09:12,976 --> 01:09:14,573
Exactly,
and she's getting resentful.
1446
01:09:14,575 --> 01:09:16,608
This way, you knock out
two birds with one stone
1447
01:09:16,610 --> 01:09:19,106
while using Mari and James as a buffer.
You're welcome.
1448
01:09:21,043 --> 01:09:23,006
Okay, fine. Fine.
1449
01:09:23,008 --> 01:09:26,709
But you agented me,
and agents do not like being agented.
1450
01:09:26,711 --> 01:09:29,240
Too bad.
And I should be an agent.
1451
01:09:29,242 --> 01:09:32,840
- What?
- You heard me, loud and clear.
1452
01:09:33,943 --> 01:09:38,109
So, you think you got what it takes
to be a good sports agent. Really?
1453
01:09:38,111 --> 01:09:39,676
What do...
what do you know about sports?
1454
01:09:39,678 --> 01:09:42,641
- Oh, basically everything!
- Oh, please.
1455
01:09:42,643 --> 01:09:44,376
I'll bet you didn't know
that Tom Brady,
1456
01:09:44,378 --> 01:09:46,542
the 199th pick
of the 2000 NFL draft,
1457
01:09:46,544 --> 01:09:48,876
has more playoff
touchdown passes, 68,
1458
01:09:48,878 --> 01:09:51,144
than number-one picks David
Carr, 65, and Tim Couch, 64,
1459
01:09:51,146 --> 01:09:52,976
had in their entire careers.
1460
01:09:52,978 --> 01:09:54,742
- I knew that.
- Oh, yeah?
1461
01:09:55,046 --> 01:09:57,510
And do you know what happened
on June 25, 2009?
1462
01:09:58,712 --> 01:10:00,508
Michael Jackson passed. Ha!
1463
01:10:01,446 --> 01:10:03,145
True. And tragic.
1464
01:10:03,147 --> 01:10:05,377
But it was also the day
that Steph Curry was selected
1465
01:10:05,379 --> 01:10:08,211
as the seventh overall pick
in the 2009 NBA draft
1466
01:10:08,213 --> 01:10:09,845
by the Golden State Warriors,
1467
01:10:09,847 --> 01:10:12,543
with a contract
totaling $12.7 million
1468
01:10:12,545 --> 01:10:15,043
over four years.
1469
01:10:15,580 --> 01:10:17,444
Isn't that great?
1470
01:10:17,813 --> 01:10:20,179
You know sports trivia.
That's beautiful.
1471
01:10:20,181 --> 01:10:21,946
But it takes more
to being an agent.
1472
01:10:21,948 --> 01:10:23,678
You have to know
how to handle people, sweetie.
1473
01:10:23,680 --> 01:10:25,146
Oh, you mean like
when I stopped you
1474
01:10:25,148 --> 01:10:26,612
from handing Rafael Nadal
1475
01:10:26,614 --> 01:10:28,246
a passed appetizer
with ham in it
1476
01:10:28,248 --> 01:10:30,146
because I read
in his autobiography
1477
01:10:30,148 --> 01:10:31,079
that he hates ham, cheese,
storms, and animals?
1478
01:10:31,081 --> 01:10:33,379
- Okurrr!
- Mm.
1479
01:10:33,381 --> 01:10:35,311
Oops, sorry.
Did that slip out?
1480
01:10:35,516 --> 01:10:37,680
Ooh. Someone's in a mood.
1481
01:10:37,682 --> 01:10:40,812
Oh! I have a pick-me-up.
1482
01:10:40,814 --> 01:10:42,545
You have a secret admirer.
1483
01:10:42,547 --> 01:10:45,112
Oh, please. You are just trying
to change the subject,
1484
01:10:45,114 --> 01:10:46,844
- and it is not going to work.
- Mm-mmm.
1485
01:10:47,347 --> 01:10:49,078
Okay, tell me who it is.
1486
01:10:49,713 --> 01:10:51,278
Well, apparently,
1487
01:10:51,280 --> 01:10:53,245
Puppy Dog Danny
wasn't crushing on me.
1488
01:10:53,247 --> 01:10:55,012
It's you he wants to mount.
1489
01:10:55,014 --> 01:10:56,713
Ooh, there he is.
1490
01:10:56,715 --> 01:10:58,180
How big you think
Shaq's dick is?
1491
01:10:58,182 --> 01:11:01,347
Yeah, he's closeted, honey.
1492
01:11:01,748 --> 01:11:04,980
And he wants to pound
on your booty cheeks.
1493
01:11:05,382 --> 01:11:08,114
I don't know why.
But there you have it.
1494
01:11:27,684 --> 01:11:30,050
Ohh! Ho-ho!
1495
01:11:30,052 --> 01:11:32,483
You suck so bad.
1496
01:11:32,485 --> 01:11:34,516
You look like you had
a seizure, girl.
1497
01:11:34,518 --> 01:11:37,149
You can just pick up the ball and
drop it in the hole next time.
1498
01:11:37,151 --> 01:11:39,917
Really? You know,
both of y'all can shut up.
1499
01:11:40,552 --> 01:11:41,882
Nice shot, baby.
1500
01:11:42,351 --> 01:11:43,282
Bam!
1501
01:11:48,018 --> 01:11:49,985
Hey, can I get
some more limes, please?
1502
01:11:49,987 --> 01:11:51,252
Sure.
1503
01:11:51,254 --> 01:11:52,718
Here you go, keep the change.
1504
01:11:53,152 --> 01:11:54,417
- Thanks.
- That's right.
1505
01:11:54,419 --> 01:11:55,850
Man, look at that ass!
1506
01:11:56,219 --> 01:11:58,117
I should tap that
before the wedding.
1507
01:11:58,586 --> 01:11:59,918
Shit, or after.
1508
01:12:00,852 --> 01:12:02,517
- You up, Ali.
- Mm-hmm.
1509
01:12:04,120 --> 01:12:06,050
- Excuse me.
- Go ahead.
1510
01:12:06,520 --> 01:12:08,053
Oh!
1511
01:12:08,055 --> 01:12:09,652
- Shit!
- Ali!
1512
01:12:09,654 --> 01:12:11,384
What the fuck?
Those are his nuts!
1513
01:12:11,386 --> 01:12:13,620
Which are getting married to me
Saturday,
1514
01:12:13,622 --> 01:12:16,254
- and I want them in good shape.
- Both balls, honey.
1515
01:12:16,256 --> 01:12:17,819
- Both of 'em?
- Yeah.
1516
01:12:17,821 --> 01:12:19,686
Man, why is Mari
even friends with Ali?
1517
01:12:19,688 --> 01:12:21,788
She only gives a shit
about herself anyways.
1518
01:12:21,790 --> 01:12:22,853
Always flaking.
1519
01:12:24,222 --> 01:12:25,919
Only reason she's here tonight
is to show off her new guy.
1520
01:12:26,121 --> 01:12:28,421
What he wearing anyway?
Tight-ass jeans.
1521
01:12:28,423 --> 01:12:31,653
- Uh, are you having fun?
- Yeah.
1522
01:12:31,655 --> 01:12:33,354
- Work hard, play hard, right?
- Mm-hmm.
1523
01:12:33,356 --> 01:12:35,386
Uh-huh.
1524
01:12:38,023 --> 01:12:41,287
- Anyone need anything else?
- No, we're good, thanks.
1525
01:12:42,755 --> 01:12:45,087
- Nice shot.
- Thanks.
1526
01:12:48,124 --> 01:12:51,623
Well, look at you,
impressing all the ladies.
1527
01:12:51,625 --> 01:12:53,388
Her?
1528
01:12:53,756 --> 01:12:54,652
Whatever.
1529
01:12:55,155 --> 01:12:57,154
Why would I waste
a second on her
1530
01:12:57,156 --> 01:12:59,220
when I got you standing
right here in front of me?
1531
01:13:04,425 --> 01:13:05,354
Um...
1532
01:13:05,657 --> 01:13:06,888
You know what?
1533
01:13:06,890 --> 01:13:08,454
Why don't you show me
how to play?
1534
01:13:08,456 --> 01:13:10,188
'Cause I suck.
1535
01:13:10,190 --> 01:13:11,754
- I would love to.
- Okay.
1536
01:13:11,756 --> 01:13:13,954
And to be clear,
if I'm putting my arms around you,
1537
01:13:13,956 --> 01:13:15,489
if I'm holding your hips,
1538
01:13:15,491 --> 01:13:17,188
it's just to get
your pool shot right.
1539
01:13:17,424 --> 01:13:19,590
- You're being professional.
- Just strictly professional.
1540
01:13:19,592 --> 01:13:21,357
You know,
I just care about my job.
1541
01:13:21,359 --> 01:13:23,923
- Okay, come on.
- I'm good at my job.
1542
01:14:12,962 --> 01:14:14,795
- Ah.
- Whoo!
1543
01:14:14,797 --> 01:14:17,427
Oh, okay, okay.
Slow down. Slow... Wait.
1544
01:14:17,828 --> 01:14:20,827
- Slow down, girl. This isn't a rodeo.
- Ah!
1545
01:14:22,364 --> 01:14:24,294
Yeah... Whoa, whoa, whoa!
Easy with the balls!
1546
01:14:24,296 --> 01:14:26,628
Easy with the balls.
They're attached to me.
1547
01:14:28,165 --> 01:14:30,862
Why are her eyes always closed?
Am I that ugly?
1548
01:14:31,097 --> 01:14:32,527
Oh, what the...
1549
01:14:33,098 --> 01:14:35,761
Damn, her eyes opened,
but she look crazy as hell.
1550
01:14:35,763 --> 01:14:37,195
They were better closed.
1551
01:14:37,197 --> 01:14:38,262
Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa...
1552
01:14:38,264 --> 01:14:40,561
God, easy on the balls.
1553
01:14:47,365 --> 01:14:48,831
What's up? You okay?
1554
01:14:50,765 --> 01:14:54,963
Just admit it.
This wasn't going so good.
1555
01:14:54,965 --> 01:14:56,297
What?
1556
01:14:56,299 --> 01:14:58,630
No, it was, it was, it was...
1557
01:14:59,166 --> 01:15:00,397
It was cool.
1558
01:15:01,266 --> 01:15:03,563
Okay, look. How about...
1559
01:15:04,732 --> 01:15:07,398
How about we try something
a little different tonight?
1560
01:15:07,400 --> 01:15:08,531
Uh, like what?
1561
01:15:10,165 --> 01:15:11,928
Like how about we call a truce?
1562
01:15:12,365 --> 01:15:14,831
Nobody is in control.
We'll just...
1563
01:15:16,033 --> 01:15:18,163
you know, we share a little bit.
1564
01:15:18,666 --> 01:15:19,764
Can you share?
1565
01:15:22,399 --> 01:15:24,330
- Yeah.
- Okay, okay...
1566
01:15:24,332 --> 01:15:26,130
Hey... share, share.
1567
01:15:26,732 --> 01:15:27,730
Share.
1568
01:15:29,433 --> 01:15:31,166
- Yeah, that's right.
- Okay.
1569
01:16:29,277 --> 01:16:30,642
How was that?
1570
01:16:32,377 --> 01:16:34,276
It was phenomenal!
1571
01:16:35,144 --> 01:16:36,475
It was like you were in my head.
1572
01:16:36,477 --> 01:16:38,175
You knew everything
that I wanted.
1573
01:16:39,045 --> 01:16:42,309
Girl, I feel like I just ran half a
marathon. I need some electrolytes.
1574
01:16:42,311 --> 01:16:44,210
- You want some electrolytes?
- No...
1575
01:16:44,212 --> 01:16:46,243
I don't smoke or nothin' after sex,
but I'm gonna get me some Gatorade.
1576
01:16:46,245 --> 01:16:47,509
- You want some Gatorade?
- No.
1577
01:16:47,511 --> 01:16:49,777
- I got flavors.
- I am good.
1578
01:16:49,779 --> 01:16:52,043
- Oh, okay. All right.
- I'm straight.
1579
01:16:53,011 --> 01:16:57,878
Ali, bomaye! Ali, bomaye!
Ali, bomaye!
1580
01:16:57,880 --> 01:16:59,010
Shit, yeah.
1581
01:17:00,280 --> 01:17:01,511
She the greatest of all time.
Thank you, Lord Jesus.
1582
01:17:01,513 --> 01:17:03,344
- Ali, bomaye!
- Yes!
1583
01:17:09,947 --> 01:17:12,145
Will and Ben are here.
They're on their way up.
1584
01:17:12,147 --> 01:17:13,378
I want to know something.
1585
01:17:14,381 --> 01:17:16,079
What do you see
in that gin jockey?
1586
01:17:16,648 --> 01:17:19,145
I mean, you're successful,
beautiful,
1587
01:17:19,448 --> 01:17:21,880
and he's a single parent
with no career.
1588
01:17:21,882 --> 01:17:23,578
Did you say "gin jockey"?
1589
01:17:23,982 --> 01:17:26,012
Yes, I said "gin jockey."
1590
01:17:26,014 --> 01:17:27,747
He is a businessman, okay?
1591
01:17:27,749 --> 01:17:30,180
He's saving his money
so he can open his own bar.
1592
01:17:30,182 --> 01:17:33,148
Like your gym.
Look, just please be nice.
1593
01:17:33,150 --> 01:17:35,446
Be nice?
I am nice. I'm nice as shit.
1594
01:17:36,548 --> 01:17:38,814
"Gin jockey"?
Where do you find these things?
1595
01:17:38,816 --> 01:17:41,648
- Come here, Dad. Hey!
- Hey.
1596
01:17:43,149 --> 01:17:45,982
- Dad, I need you to meet Will and Ben.
- Hi.
1597
01:17:45,984 --> 01:17:47,548
- Nice to meet you, sir.
- Welcome, welcome.
1598
01:17:47,885 --> 01:17:49,615
I'll give it three months.
1599
01:17:49,617 --> 01:17:52,248
She'll chew him up
and spit him out.
1600
01:17:53,648 --> 01:17:55,946
Hey, did you introduce yourself?
1601
01:17:56,316 --> 01:17:58,846
Hi, I'm Ben.
It's nice to meet you.
1602
01:17:58,848 --> 01:18:00,014
Wait, wait, wait.
1603
01:18:00,016 --> 01:18:03,681
So, tomorrow.
Big signing day, huh?
1604
01:18:03,683 --> 01:18:04,715
Yep.
1605
01:18:04,717 --> 01:18:06,081
No worries about, you know,
1606
01:18:06,083 --> 01:18:07,482
crazy Joe changing his mind
1607
01:18:07,484 --> 01:18:08,816
or Jamal trying
to stay in school?
1608
01:18:09,051 --> 01:18:11,014
Nah, I have a pretty good gauge
on that situation.
1609
01:18:11,016 --> 01:18:14,115
So I think I know
what's on Jamal's mind.
1610
01:18:14,117 --> 01:18:15,082
I'm sure you do.
1611
01:18:15,684 --> 01:18:18,115
But, you know,
knowing what's on a man's mind
1612
01:18:18,117 --> 01:18:19,949
is not the same
as what's in his heart.
1613
01:18:19,951 --> 01:18:22,448
Well, isn't it the same thing?
To get paid and get laid?
1614
01:18:22,450 --> 01:18:25,417
Wait. You really think
that's what men want?
1615
01:18:25,419 --> 01:18:28,017
- Mm-hmm.
- Wow.
1616
01:18:28,253 --> 01:18:30,349
- That's messed up.
- Well...
1617
01:18:30,351 --> 01:18:32,349
Have you ever
even trusted a man?
1618
01:18:33,218 --> 01:18:34,550
She trusts me.
1619
01:18:35,185 --> 01:18:36,916
Okay. Well, see...
1620
01:18:37,819 --> 01:18:42,484
I think that men and women just want
the same thing at the end of the day.
1621
01:18:43,054 --> 01:18:45,919
They want to be
with somebody they trust.
1622
01:18:46,452 --> 01:18:49,050
To be respected,
appreciated, and...
1623
01:18:49,687 --> 01:18:51,517
and just to feel safe.
1624
01:18:51,821 --> 01:18:54,418
So you believe men and women
want the same thing?
1625
01:18:54,753 --> 01:18:57,619
As a bartender, I've learned
to sit back and listen.
1626
01:18:57,621 --> 01:19:00,453
Eventually, you learn
how people really feel.
1627
01:19:01,221 --> 01:19:02,319
Good to know.
1628
01:19:02,754 --> 01:19:05,353
Wow, she is really beautiful.
1629
01:19:05,720 --> 01:19:07,818
So, now that we know
what men and women want,
1630
01:19:08,156 --> 01:19:10,753
the question is what do boys want?
1631
01:19:10,755 --> 01:19:13,186
Got any gift ideas
for your birthday, Ben?
1632
01:19:13,188 --> 01:19:14,854
My dad works real hard,
1633
01:19:14,856 --> 01:19:17,253
so I try not to make
a big deal out of it.
1634
01:19:17,588 --> 01:19:20,454
It's mostly just
about me and him hanging out.
1635
01:19:20,456 --> 01:19:22,721
Us, too.
1636
01:19:24,522 --> 01:19:26,921
Do you know that Ali grew up
without a mom?
1637
01:19:26,923 --> 01:19:29,287
I think
about that woman every day.
1638
01:19:29,722 --> 01:19:30,988
And it still hurts.
1639
01:19:31,356 --> 01:19:35,522
You know, Ben, I imagine your
dad had to work extra hard
1640
01:19:35,524 --> 01:19:37,423
to raise a kid as kind as you.
1641
01:19:37,425 --> 01:19:38,689
Thank you, Skip.
1642
01:19:39,590 --> 01:19:41,887
I think you can appreciate it
more than most.
1643
01:19:44,092 --> 01:19:45,322
To fatherhood.
1644
01:19:54,459 --> 01:19:55,358
You did it!
1645
01:19:55,693 --> 01:19:57,323
You guys day drinking? I'm in.
1646
01:19:57,325 --> 01:19:58,656
Oh, hey.
1647
01:19:58,658 --> 01:20:00,124
Yeah. Let me just grab
two more glasses.
1648
01:20:00,126 --> 01:20:01,691
I'll be right back.
1649
01:20:01,693 --> 01:20:02,758
Did you figure out
who you're gonna draft,
1650
01:20:02,760 --> 01:20:03,924
Roethlisberger or Brady?
1651
01:20:03,926 --> 01:20:05,757
I think I'm gonna go with Brady,
1652
01:20:05,759 --> 01:20:07,324
but my friend Duncan said
he's gonna get Roethlisberger,
1653
01:20:07,326 --> 01:20:09,089
and we can swap
any time we want.
1654
01:20:09,091 --> 01:20:11,655
God, he's beautiful.
And he loves fantasy football?
1655
01:20:11,657 --> 01:20:13,289
What kind of league is that?
1656
01:20:13,291 --> 01:20:15,189
Do you have to wear
a weird T-shirt or some shit?
1657
01:20:15,191 --> 01:20:18,155
It sounds nice.
And he plays fantasy football?
1658
01:20:18,659 --> 01:20:19,824
He's perfect.
1659
01:20:20,225 --> 01:20:23,556
Hey, you know what?
Why don't you two play together?
1660
01:20:24,193 --> 01:20:26,657
- Oh, yeah.
- Yeah, I... I would love that.
1661
01:20:26,659 --> 01:20:28,092
You know, you can't pick...
1662
01:20:28,094 --> 01:20:29,958
Do you take this man
1663
01:20:29,960 --> 01:20:32,392
to be your lawfully
wedded husband?
1664
01:20:32,394 --> 01:20:34,190
He's got it all! Uh!
1665
01:20:34,192 --> 01:20:37,191
Okay, you know what?
I have to get a lot of work done
1666
01:20:37,193 --> 01:20:39,292
before Will comes here
to take me to lunch, so...
1667
01:20:39,294 --> 01:20:41,059
Hey, did you see?
Joe Dolla called a press conference.
1668
01:20:41,061 --> 01:20:42,192
- What?
- That's right.
1669
01:20:42,194 --> 01:20:43,826
I'm telling you,
1670
01:20:43,828 --> 01:20:45,193
when it come to him,
he look just like me.
1671
01:20:45,195 --> 01:20:46,991
This is my son.
1672
01:20:46,993 --> 01:20:49,826
Matter of fact, we gonna withdraw
from the NBA draft right now.
1673
01:20:49,828 --> 01:20:52,793
I'ma take Jamal's gifts
to the great nation of China.
1674
01:20:52,795 --> 01:20:54,794
Ni hao! Holla!
1675
01:20:54,796 --> 01:20:56,326
What about
all that talk of playing
1676
01:20:56,328 --> 01:20:57,794
for your hometown, Jamal?
1677
01:20:57,796 --> 01:21:00,160
What can I say?
You know, situation changed.
1678
01:21:00,162 --> 01:21:02,427
What kind of money
are the Chinese offering?
1679
01:21:02,429 --> 01:21:04,193
Our new concierge agent,
1680
01:21:04,195 --> 01:21:06,127
Ethan Fowler,
he gonna answer that.
1681
01:21:06,129 --> 01:21:07,927
- Money Man! Tell 'em wassup.
- Yep.
1682
01:21:07,929 --> 01:21:09,862
Hey there, ladies and gentlemen.
Ethan Fowler.
1683
01:21:09,864 --> 01:21:12,394
Our good friends in China
are currently offering
1684
01:21:12,396 --> 01:21:15,095
three times
the rookie NBA deal, okay?
1685
01:21:15,097 --> 01:21:17,760
Does this mean you've
signed with Summit Worldwide?
1686
01:21:17,762 --> 01:21:19,528
I'll actually answer
that one. Uh...
1687
01:21:19,530 --> 01:21:21,162
I've currently left Summit
1688
01:21:21,164 --> 01:21:24,395
to focus exclusively all my time
and energy on one client.
1689
01:21:24,397 --> 01:21:26,896
He cut,
he sliced his rates in half.
1690
01:21:26,898 --> 01:21:28,195
- Yeah, I know.
- In half!
1691
01:21:28,197 --> 01:21:29,328
I mean, come on, ten percent...
1692
01:21:29,330 --> 01:21:30,862
that is highway robbery.
1693
01:21:37,199 --> 01:21:38,564
Everybody out.
1694
01:21:39,365 --> 01:21:41,029
Out! Get out!
1695
01:21:41,699 --> 01:21:44,564
Ali. You stay.
1696
01:21:48,465 --> 01:21:51,764
Uh, I'm sure that China deal
is not closed.
1697
01:21:51,766 --> 01:21:53,298
We can still save this.
1698
01:21:55,299 --> 01:21:57,430
We can save this.
1699
01:21:57,768 --> 01:22:00,366
Five-percent commission. Wow.
1700
01:22:01,101 --> 01:22:04,299
Not only did you blow this
signing, you gave Ethan the idea
1701
01:22:04,301 --> 01:22:06,666
that could very well fuck our
business model completely.
1702
01:22:06,668 --> 01:22:08,532
Okay, this is not all my fault.
1703
01:22:08,534 --> 01:22:11,900
I mean, if I didn't think I'd get
crucified by all those MeToo-ers,
1704
01:22:11,902 --> 01:22:13,632
I'd fire your ass today.
1705
01:22:14,402 --> 01:22:17,767
Oh, so you're saying you're not
firing me because I'm a woman.
1706
01:22:19,135 --> 01:22:21,233
No. Not just that.
1707
01:22:22,635 --> 01:22:23,666
Oh.
1708
01:22:24,300 --> 01:22:28,066
So, you're not firing me
because I'm a black woman.
1709
01:22:28,400 --> 01:22:30,431
No. No, no. I didn't say that.
1710
01:22:30,701 --> 01:22:32,699
Because that'd be racist
and sexist.
1711
01:22:32,701 --> 01:22:35,499
Hell, no.
I am not your twofer.
1712
01:22:35,501 --> 01:22:37,099
I dare you to fire me.
1713
01:22:37,101 --> 01:22:39,633
My clients will follow me
out that door.
1714
01:22:40,167 --> 01:22:42,665
You keep on dreaming that dream.
1715
01:22:46,268 --> 01:22:48,034
- Nick, please...
- Nope, not happening.
1716
01:22:48,036 --> 01:22:49,601
- There she goes.
- Hey.
1717
01:22:49,603 --> 01:22:50,935
- Hey, girl, ready for lunch?
- Yeah.
1718
01:22:50,937 --> 01:22:52,567
I can wait downstairs
if that's better.
1719
01:22:52,569 --> 01:22:54,566
- Okay.
- Oh, great. You know what?
1720
01:22:55,137 --> 01:22:57,568
You can stop pretending.
Okay, Will?
1721
01:22:57,570 --> 01:22:58,834
If that's even your name.
1722
01:22:59,136 --> 01:23:02,669
Actually, I'm glad this
charade can finally end.
1723
01:23:02,671 --> 01:23:05,169
Sorry, "charade"?
What's he talking about?
1724
01:23:05,171 --> 01:23:06,601
- Nick, please, don't...
- You two.
1725
01:23:07,104 --> 01:23:08,702
Pretending that
y'all are married
1726
01:23:09,005 --> 01:23:11,469
to impress that fucking fraud
Joe Dolla!
1727
01:23:11,970 --> 01:23:14,937
Well, you know what?
It didn't work.
1728
01:23:15,738 --> 01:23:17,601
Mr. Family Man, huh?
1729
01:23:19,938 --> 01:23:22,502
Okay, whoo.
This is a big misunderstanding.
1730
01:23:22,504 --> 01:23:23,502
So wait, wait, hold up.
1731
01:23:24,472 --> 01:23:27,070
That's why you really
invited us to the game?
1732
01:23:27,940 --> 01:23:30,137
- No.
- Not to make up for the fact
1733
01:23:30,139 --> 01:23:34,404
that you accused me of cheating
on my dead wife with you?
1734
01:23:34,406 --> 01:23:35,403
No.
1735
01:23:35,706 --> 01:23:37,538
Please, it is very complicated.
1736
01:23:37,540 --> 01:23:40,603
- Just let me talk to you alone.
- About... About what?
1737
01:23:40,840 --> 01:23:45,139
About what? How you used my son,
my child, as a prop?
1738
01:23:51,275 --> 01:23:52,204
Just...
1739
01:23:52,641 --> 01:23:54,272
- Please.
- Please stay away from us.
1740
01:23:55,374 --> 01:23:56,305
Please.
1741
01:24:15,976 --> 01:24:18,441
These powers
have ruined my life.
1742
01:24:19,011 --> 01:24:20,775
I would like to return them.
1743
01:24:21,211 --> 01:24:23,374
Or whatever you do with powers.
1744
01:24:23,577 --> 01:24:24,975
Well, if I can be real,
1745
01:24:25,511 --> 01:24:28,576
I finished off the Haitian tea,
drunk it all myself.
1746
01:24:28,943 --> 01:24:30,910
- And...
- The only voices I heard
1747
01:24:30,912 --> 01:24:33,944
were Joan Rivers and Tupac.
1748
01:24:34,678 --> 01:24:36,541
And they did not get along.
1749
01:24:37,144 --> 01:24:40,708
My God, this is a disaster.
1750
01:24:41,643 --> 01:24:45,308
Mm.
Maybe you looking at it the wrong way.
1751
01:24:46,909 --> 01:24:50,374
With power comes a
responsibility to tell the truth.
1752
01:24:51,043 --> 01:24:52,973
Have you been telling the truth?
1753
01:24:54,077 --> 01:24:55,974
You need to let
the spirit guide you.
1754
01:25:09,013 --> 01:25:11,076
- The spirit.
- Yeah.
1755
01:25:18,779 --> 01:25:20,211
Spirit.
1756
01:25:27,781 --> 01:25:31,279
Yikes. Hey, maybe we, uh,
take it easy on the drinky-drink there.
1757
01:25:31,281 --> 01:25:33,279
Ceremony's about to start
and you're in it, okay?
1758
01:25:33,281 --> 01:25:35,511
No, no, no.
I need a cranberry vodka
1759
01:25:35,513 --> 01:25:37,845
because I'm feeling the spirit,
Brandon.
1760
01:25:37,847 --> 01:25:40,344
- Uh-huh.
- I have words, they need saying.
1761
01:25:40,782 --> 01:25:44,213
As a matter of fact,
everybody in here
1762
01:25:44,215 --> 01:25:47,246
needs a big, steaming mug
of hot tea.
1763
01:25:47,248 --> 01:25:50,246
Oh, or maybe everybody just
sticks with water, you know...
1764
01:25:50,248 --> 01:25:53,114
No. No, no, no. How about you go get
that vodka cran like I said, baby.
1765
01:25:53,116 --> 01:25:55,347
- Uh-huh.
- Trusty assistant. Go.
1766
01:25:55,683 --> 01:25:56,714
Hm.
1767
01:25:56,716 --> 01:25:58,180
And Christ said,
1768
01:25:58,182 --> 01:25:59,847
"A man shall leave
his mother and father
1769
01:25:59,849 --> 01:26:01,614
and cleave to his wife,
1770
01:26:02,349 --> 01:26:04,247
so that they are
no more twain..."
1771
01:26:04,249 --> 01:26:07,148
Check out that tasty
Oreo bridesmaid sandwich.
1772
01:26:07,150 --> 01:26:09,549
I can't believe how long
this Viagra's lasting!
1773
01:26:09,551 --> 01:26:11,781
Can't believe I'm
missing the game for this shit.
1774
01:26:11,783 --> 01:26:13,048
Did I leave my keys on my desk?
1775
01:26:13,050 --> 01:26:14,682
♪ Cotton-eyed Joe ♪
1776
01:26:14,684 --> 01:26:16,682
♪ I'd been married
A long time ago ♪
1777
01:26:16,684 --> 01:26:18,482
♪ Where did you come from?
Where did you go? ♪
1778
01:26:18,484 --> 01:26:20,516
Oh, man. This suit's
giving me a swamp ass.
1779
01:26:20,518 --> 01:26:22,682
I love the word
"Toledo." To-le-do.
1780
01:26:22,684 --> 01:26:24,450
Can't believe I said "I
love you" to the delivery guy.
1781
01:26:24,452 --> 01:26:26,350
Look at Gabby's tits
just hanging out.
1782
01:26:26,352 --> 01:26:28,616
Haven't tapped that
since Mari was in Boston.
1783
01:26:28,618 --> 01:26:30,451
Might need to get that again
soon though.
1784
01:26:30,453 --> 01:26:31,882
Ladies and gentlemen,
the bride and groom
1785
01:26:31,884 --> 01:26:33,516
have written their own vows.
1786
01:26:33,518 --> 01:26:34,916
- James?
- Yes, sir.
1787
01:26:35,653 --> 01:26:38,317
When I met you on that
sun-dappled June afternoon
1788
01:26:38,319 --> 01:26:40,049
- at the Waffle House...
- He said, "dappled".
1789
01:26:40,051 --> 01:26:41,851
...and you put
that whole bottle of hot sauce
1790
01:26:41,853 --> 01:26:42,884
on your two-piece...
1791
01:26:44,054 --> 01:26:45,883
I knew right then there'd
never be another woman for me.
1792
01:26:45,885 --> 01:26:47,885
Oh, God.
I'm so sorry. I'm sorry.
1793
01:26:47,887 --> 01:26:50,918
- I'm so, so sorry.
- What the hell?
1794
01:26:50,920 --> 01:26:53,483
I... have something I gotta say.
1795
01:26:53,485 --> 01:26:54,850
What are you doing?
1796
01:26:54,852 --> 01:26:57,916
Girl, I am letting the spirit
move me.
1797
01:26:58,186 --> 01:26:59,083
Huh?
1798
01:27:00,820 --> 01:27:02,184
I...
1799
01:27:03,586 --> 01:27:05,149
I've been given a gift.
1800
01:27:05,552 --> 01:27:06,983
Possibly by God.
1801
01:27:06,985 --> 01:27:09,085
Possibly by a low-rent,
1802
01:27:09,087 --> 01:27:11,517
hair-styling,
weed-dealing psychic. But...
1803
01:27:12,219 --> 01:27:14,684
I can hear men's thoughts.
1804
01:27:16,120 --> 01:27:17,851
Ali, why don't you just come
1805
01:27:17,853 --> 01:27:19,218
sit down here with me
for a minute?
1806
01:27:19,220 --> 01:27:20,518
Uh, Brandon, back up.
1807
01:27:20,921 --> 01:27:21,817
Back up.
1808
01:27:22,119 --> 01:27:23,720
I'm just saying,
as your friend...
1809
01:27:23,722 --> 01:27:26,319
You... are not my friend.
1810
01:27:26,321 --> 01:27:28,785
You are my assistant, though.
1811
01:27:29,087 --> 01:27:30,952
And right now
you're not assisting me,
1812
01:27:30,954 --> 01:27:33,655
you're interrupting my message!
1813
01:27:33,657 --> 01:27:36,520
So I need you to sit down
and shut the fuck up!
1814
01:27:37,855 --> 01:27:38,987
Hallelujah.
1815
01:27:41,589 --> 01:27:42,820
You're on your own.
1816
01:27:43,622 --> 01:27:44,620
Excuse me.
1817
01:27:44,622 --> 01:27:45,687
Thank... Thank you.
1818
01:27:46,190 --> 01:27:48,154
- Thank you for sharing that with us.
- And...
1819
01:27:49,124 --> 01:27:50,722
because of my gift,
1820
01:27:51,290 --> 01:27:55,188
James, I know you are not worthy
of my friend, Mari.
1821
01:27:55,190 --> 01:27:56,656
What are you talking about?
1822
01:27:56,658 --> 01:27:58,723
And you need to know,
before you jump the broom,
1823
01:27:58,725 --> 01:28:01,688
that he slept with your
cousin Gabby last May.
1824
01:28:02,991 --> 01:28:04,955
- What?
- While you were in Boston, girl.
1825
01:28:04,957 --> 01:28:07,457
That... That never happened.
That never, never happened.
1826
01:28:07,459 --> 01:28:10,422
I am so sorry, Mari.
He said you were on a break.
1827
01:28:12,825 --> 01:28:14,123
Is this true?
1828
01:28:14,625 --> 01:28:15,789
Everybody lying right now.
1829
01:28:16,258 --> 01:28:19,823
- Mari!
- Whoo! He deserved that! Amen!
1830
01:28:20,092 --> 01:28:21,857
- Bring it over here.
- Oh! Baby, hold on.
1831
01:28:21,859 --> 01:28:24,758
Ali, cut it out.
This is not the time or the place.
1832
01:28:24,760 --> 01:28:29,057
Well, Ciarra, you have problems
in your own house.
1833
01:28:29,059 --> 01:28:31,824
Don't throw no stones,
living in a glass house.
1834
01:28:32,126 --> 01:28:35,958
Excuse me? My house is fine.
In fact, it's locked down.
1835
01:28:35,960 --> 01:28:38,958
Okay? I think
you're just a little jealous
1836
01:28:38,960 --> 01:28:40,826
because we're all married.
1837
01:28:40,828 --> 01:28:42,426
I have always felt that way.
1838
01:28:42,428 --> 01:28:45,494
- Are you ser... Really?
- Yeah. Mm-hmm.
1839
01:28:46,160 --> 01:28:47,859
So look at yourself.
1840
01:28:47,861 --> 01:28:50,593
Well, your husband has been
getting his thing sucked,
1841
01:28:50,828 --> 01:28:53,860
on the down-low, by his golf buddy Louis.
1842
01:28:53,862 --> 01:28:55,460
I have always felt that way.
1843
01:28:55,462 --> 01:28:57,059
- He what?
- You've lost your mind.
1844
01:28:57,061 --> 01:28:58,393
I would never.
That's disgusting!
1845
01:28:58,728 --> 01:29:01,360
It wasn't when you were
sucking on my dick!
1846
01:29:01,362 --> 01:29:03,227
Oh, Lord, not in the church!
1847
01:29:03,229 --> 01:29:04,694
Hallelujah! A testimony!
1848
01:29:04,696 --> 01:29:06,961
You kissed me
with dick on your lips?
1849
01:29:06,963 --> 01:29:08,161
- Oh, hell, no!
- Whoo!
1850
01:29:14,229 --> 01:29:16,091
That's my brother.
Hold Terence.
1851
01:29:16,561 --> 01:29:17,425
Oh, no!
1852
01:29:18,729 --> 01:29:20,460
- Oh, yeah!
- Everyone...
1853
01:29:20,462 --> 01:29:21,860
Don't you take that! Don't you...
1854
01:29:21,862 --> 01:29:23,060
Oh, yeah!
1855
01:29:23,062 --> 01:29:24,660
- Oh, really?
- My hair!
1856
01:29:29,062 --> 01:29:31,559
- Eat it! Eat the wig!
- Just grow up.
1857
01:29:33,330 --> 01:29:34,626
Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo!
1858
01:29:34,628 --> 01:29:35,526
Bitch!
1859
01:29:37,597 --> 01:29:38,661
Stay back!
1860
01:29:41,463 --> 01:29:42,595
Oh, oh.
1861
01:29:46,331 --> 01:29:49,296
Well, hello. Welcome back.
1862
01:29:51,299 --> 01:29:52,461
I'd just like to say...
1863
01:29:53,331 --> 01:29:56,297
since your last visit,
I went to detox
1864
01:29:56,299 --> 01:29:58,228
and I got my life back on track.
1865
01:29:58,531 --> 01:29:59,663
So, thank you.
1866
01:30:04,699 --> 01:30:05,597
That's it?
1867
01:30:06,332 --> 01:30:07,530
That's what?
1868
01:30:09,333 --> 01:30:10,664
I don't hear anything.
1869
01:30:11,800 --> 01:30:12,864
No sound?
1870
01:30:13,332 --> 01:30:16,063
- No sound?
- No, no, no, I hear that. I just...
1871
01:30:17,634 --> 01:30:19,799
I... I don't hear
your inner thoughts.
1872
01:30:20,401 --> 01:30:22,397
That's a good thing, trust me.
1873
01:30:25,166 --> 01:30:27,533
Okay, so, um, great,
I guess I can go.
1874
01:30:27,535 --> 01:30:29,932
- Ah, well...
- Where my peeps at?
1875
01:30:30,468 --> 01:30:32,332
Ali, you can leave anytime,
1876
01:30:32,334 --> 01:30:35,099
but, um,
there's no one here for you.
1877
01:30:37,435 --> 01:30:38,633
Oh.
1878
01:30:42,536 --> 01:30:44,401
Guess I'll get myself home.
1879
01:30:58,736 --> 01:31:00,568
- So let's just stay in...
- You hear me?
1880
01:31:00,570 --> 01:31:02,501
- ...your lane.
- You got you.
1881
01:31:02,503 --> 01:31:05,568
About what, how you used
my son, my child, as a prop?
1882
01:31:05,570 --> 01:31:07,402
We share a little bit.
Can you share?
1883
01:31:07,404 --> 01:31:09,202
I believe
you are a good person.
1884
01:31:09,204 --> 01:31:10,901
It's not like you have
a lot of friends here.
1885
01:31:10,903 --> 01:31:12,535
Work hard,
play hard, right?
1886
01:31:12,772 --> 01:31:14,236
Constantly
throwing the first punch,
1887
01:31:14,238 --> 01:31:15,836
and you got you and no one else.
1888
01:31:15,838 --> 01:31:18,068
That bartender
get back to you yet?
1889
01:31:20,040 --> 01:31:21,405
No.
1890
01:31:22,271 --> 01:31:25,504
And I don't blame him,
the shit I pulled.
1891
01:31:27,003 --> 01:31:29,601
I just wanted to win, you know?
1892
01:31:30,971 --> 01:31:32,702
I let it get away from me.
1893
01:31:33,271 --> 01:31:36,603
No, no, no. That's on me.
1894
01:31:38,904 --> 01:31:42,769
When your mom took off,
I didn't trust anyone.
1895
01:31:44,039 --> 01:31:47,468
And... I put that all on you.
1896
01:31:49,205 --> 01:31:50,703
I'm sorry if I...
1897
01:31:51,605 --> 01:31:53,470
taught you some wrong lessons.
1898
01:31:53,472 --> 01:31:57,770
I wanted you to toughen up,
because I was so scared.
1899
01:31:59,305 --> 01:32:01,436
I didn't want you
to be scared, too.
1900
01:32:02,207 --> 01:32:03,338
Dad...
1901
01:32:03,873 --> 01:32:05,538
you did an amazing job.
1902
01:32:06,172 --> 01:32:08,470
An excellent job.
1903
01:32:09,941 --> 01:32:13,040
No. This is all on me, okay?
1904
01:32:13,407 --> 01:32:15,104
I messed everything up.
1905
01:32:15,409 --> 01:32:18,373
And now I got to put my
big-girl drawers on and fix it.
1906
01:32:21,742 --> 01:32:25,539
You know, there's things
that we probably need to learn.
1907
01:32:25,975 --> 01:32:28,139
When to lower our fist.
1908
01:32:28,442 --> 01:32:31,041
There's so many
beautiful things that...
1909
01:32:31,742 --> 01:32:34,539
we don't see
because our hands are...
1910
01:32:35,309 --> 01:32:37,340
in front of our face.
1911
01:32:43,276 --> 01:32:44,474
Thanks, Dad.
1912
01:32:46,877 --> 01:32:49,676
You're the best.
1913
01:32:54,145 --> 01:32:56,875
You know, I don't really need
to check with Ali on that one.
1914
01:32:56,877 --> 01:33:00,509
Serena Williams is not gonna do
local TV ads for a mattress store.
1915
01:33:00,511 --> 01:33:02,643
But thank you
for your interests.
1916
01:33:04,879 --> 01:33:05,876
You're here.
1917
01:33:06,979 --> 01:33:09,110
Yeah. Danny said it would
be better to look for work
1918
01:33:09,112 --> 01:33:10,309
while I still have a job.
1919
01:33:10,311 --> 01:33:11,743
So, I'm looking for work.
1920
01:33:11,745 --> 01:33:13,677
Which I'm sure
you already heard.
1921
01:33:13,679 --> 01:33:16,276
I don't have the power
anymore.
1922
01:33:16,979 --> 01:33:18,877
I can't hear men's voices.
1923
01:33:21,346 --> 01:33:24,344
So, I just told you all of that
for no reason.
1924
01:33:24,881 --> 01:33:27,379
Wow, I just cannot win.
1925
01:33:27,746 --> 01:33:30,678
Hey! Still the best part
of my day.
1926
01:33:36,514 --> 01:33:37,880
Wait, are you two...
1927
01:33:37,882 --> 01:33:39,443
Playing
fantasy football together?
1928
01:33:39,445 --> 01:33:40,543
Yes, we are.
1929
01:33:42,146 --> 01:33:44,544
That's great.
1930
01:33:47,779 --> 01:33:49,943
Can I talk to you
in my office?
1931
01:33:51,714 --> 01:33:52,778
Please?
1932
01:33:53,413 --> 01:33:54,911
Have a seat.
1933
01:33:58,947 --> 01:34:00,478
Listen, Brandon.
1934
01:34:01,181 --> 01:34:02,779
I'm sorry about that bullshit
1935
01:34:02,781 --> 01:34:06,046
about you not being cut out
to be an agent.
1936
01:34:06,981 --> 01:34:09,513
I would've told you anything
to keep you on my desk,
1937
01:34:09,515 --> 01:34:10,945
because I needed you.
1938
01:34:13,815 --> 01:34:16,580
And you're a better friend
than I deserve.
1939
01:34:21,349 --> 01:34:23,248
You... That's...
You're apologizing.
1940
01:34:23,250 --> 01:34:24,448
Yes.
1941
01:34:25,116 --> 01:34:26,781
- To me.
- Mm-hmm.
1942
01:34:27,250 --> 01:34:28,347
Wow.
1943
01:34:29,218 --> 01:34:30,782
I did not see that coming.
1944
01:34:31,750 --> 01:34:35,416
It's not a promotion or a raise,
but it is definitely something.
1945
01:34:35,418 --> 01:34:37,783
Okay, well,
you get a raise effective today.
1946
01:34:38,150 --> 01:34:41,116
And will until you find
something better.
1947
01:34:41,118 --> 01:34:43,082
And a promotion, TBD.
1948
01:34:44,018 --> 01:34:46,549
I don't even know
if I still work here.
1949
01:34:46,984 --> 01:34:48,049
Have you heard anything?
1950
01:34:51,018 --> 01:34:52,482
Well, thank you.
1951
01:34:57,651 --> 01:35:01,650
Oh, God, I just wish
I had gotten out of my own head
1952
01:35:02,320 --> 01:35:06,685
and gotten to know Jamal
instead of try to sell him.
1953
01:35:07,186 --> 01:35:09,850
I just wish I'd listened to him.
1954
01:35:30,221 --> 01:35:33,452
All right, you have got to
be psychic or something.
1955
01:35:34,188 --> 01:35:35,352
What you got over there?
1956
01:35:35,354 --> 01:35:37,321
Um, just a little Chinese food
1957
01:35:37,323 --> 01:35:39,087
to celebrate your success.
1958
01:35:40,022 --> 01:35:42,120
Well, I guess I'll be
eating a lot of it then.
1959
01:35:42,122 --> 01:35:43,386
You happy?
1960
01:35:45,023 --> 01:35:46,054
What do you think?
1961
01:35:49,290 --> 01:35:50,588
Let me see that.
1962
01:35:52,423 --> 01:35:53,688
I don't know.
1963
01:35:53,690 --> 01:35:55,654
I'm not even gonna pretend
to know.
1964
01:35:57,889 --> 01:35:59,954
- Whoo-hoo!
- Okay. Look at you.
1965
01:35:59,956 --> 01:36:03,021
What can I say?
My dad wanted a boy.
1966
01:36:03,023 --> 01:36:05,554
Yeah, well, you don't even
have to tell me about dads.
1967
01:36:05,788 --> 01:36:07,719
You know, mine is, uh, unique.
1968
01:36:08,023 --> 01:36:09,387
That is very true.
1969
01:36:16,124 --> 01:36:18,588
Dad took me out to this court
when I was five.
1970
01:36:19,656 --> 01:36:23,587
And he would not let me leave
until I sank three in a row.
1971
01:36:24,091 --> 01:36:25,189
And it got us here.
1972
01:36:25,592 --> 01:36:26,790
I know it sounds corny,
1973
01:36:26,792 --> 01:36:28,455
but I want to win
a championship
1974
01:36:28,457 --> 01:36:29,989
and celebrate here.
1975
01:36:30,558 --> 01:36:32,157
With the people I grew up with.
1976
01:36:33,258 --> 01:36:34,257
That's my dream.
1977
01:36:34,259 --> 01:36:35,524
I get it.
1978
01:36:39,291 --> 01:36:40,557
Give me that.
1979
01:36:41,759 --> 01:36:43,690
You're gonna have a lot
of people coming at you
1980
01:36:43,692 --> 01:36:45,858
with all sorts of advice
from here on out.
1981
01:36:45,860 --> 01:36:47,457
- You know that, right?
- Right.
1982
01:36:47,459 --> 01:36:49,058
But you're the one
I should listen to, right?
1983
01:36:51,226 --> 01:36:54,224
No. The only person
you should listen to is you.
1984
01:36:55,292 --> 01:36:58,524
Because you're the only person
who knows what you really want.
1985
01:36:59,161 --> 01:37:02,093
Forget your head.
What's in your heart?
1986
01:37:07,393 --> 01:37:09,725
Just fuck him. I'm done.
1987
01:37:10,194 --> 01:37:13,992
I always sensed that he was
a skeezy motherfucker.
1988
01:37:13,994 --> 01:37:15,692
But you know what?
I was on that marriage train
1989
01:37:15,694 --> 01:37:17,126
and I didn't want to get off.
1990
01:37:17,128 --> 01:37:18,559
Just fucking stupid.
1991
01:37:18,561 --> 01:37:21,526
When that woman
leaped onto the stage
1992
01:37:21,528 --> 01:37:23,225
and ripped out your hair...
1993
01:37:24,028 --> 01:37:26,328
I almost put down my phone
and said something.
1994
01:37:26,330 --> 01:37:29,794
- How is that helping us?
- Not... Oh, twelve o'clock.
1995
01:37:30,295 --> 01:37:31,462
Hi.
1996
01:37:31,464 --> 01:37:35,027
- No. No.
- No. No. No.
1997
01:37:35,362 --> 01:37:37,229
Nope, nope, nope, nope.
1998
01:37:37,231 --> 01:37:39,128
Let them grieve.
1999
01:37:40,196 --> 01:37:44,496
You know, by the grace of God,
my marriage is still intact.
2000
01:37:44,498 --> 01:37:46,161
It was stronger than theirs
to begin with.
2001
01:37:46,163 --> 01:37:48,963
But it is still intact,
because my husband wasn't there.
2002
01:37:48,965 --> 01:37:50,629
- What the fuck?
- All right?
2003
01:37:50,631 --> 01:37:52,329
But I am devastated
for the two of them.
2004
01:37:52,331 --> 01:37:53,663
Devastated.
2005
01:37:53,665 --> 01:37:55,962
- You ruined their lives!
- Um, look, I'm...
2006
01:37:57,897 --> 01:38:00,463
I know you guys probably hate me
for what I pulled.
2007
01:38:00,465 --> 01:38:02,930
I am so sorry, okay?
2008
01:38:03,298 --> 01:38:05,396
I really want
to make it up to you.
2009
01:38:05,899 --> 01:38:09,065
Look, I did what I did
because I love you, okay?
2010
01:38:09,564 --> 01:38:11,262
Not because I'm jealous.
2011
01:38:11,264 --> 01:38:12,862
I want what's best
for all of you,
2012
01:38:12,864 --> 01:38:14,964
and I'm not gonna let you
marry a skeezer
2013
01:38:14,966 --> 01:38:16,530
and I'm not gonna stand by
and not tell you
2014
01:38:16,532 --> 01:38:17,995
about your down-low husband.
2015
01:38:17,997 --> 01:38:19,964
I'm sorry.
I'm a friend, not an enabler.
2016
01:38:19,966 --> 01:38:23,430
That was some freaky-ass shit
you pulled.
2017
01:38:23,432 --> 01:38:25,429
You could hear men's thoughts.
2018
01:38:25,898 --> 01:38:27,829
And you didn't tell us,
your girls?
2019
01:38:27,831 --> 01:38:30,064
- Yeah, what the fuck?
- We should've been the first to know.
2020
01:38:30,066 --> 01:38:31,698
We could've helped you out!
2021
01:38:31,700 --> 01:38:33,164
- That's good information.
- Look...
2022
01:38:33,632 --> 01:38:35,563
I know I've been
a shitty friend.
2023
01:38:35,565 --> 01:38:36,864
- Mm-hmm.
- Yes.
2024
01:38:36,866 --> 01:38:38,232
- Very shitty.
- Terrible.
2025
01:38:38,234 --> 01:38:39,531
Very shitty friend.
2026
01:38:39,533 --> 01:38:41,397
And that is Jesus
speaking through me.
2027
01:38:41,399 --> 01:38:43,932
I mean, like skid-mark-in-the-drawers
shitty-ass friend.
2028
01:38:43,934 --> 01:38:47,199
I'm about to write poetry about
it, just to express my rage.
2029
01:38:47,201 --> 01:38:49,499
- Well, that's a good thing.
- Boo-Boo Shitty Kitty.
2030
01:38:49,501 --> 01:38:51,865
- Shit on top of shit.
- One star on Yelp.
2031
01:38:51,867 --> 01:38:54,266
- Shitty Shitty Bang Bang Ali.
- "Knock, knock."
2032
01:38:54,268 --> 01:38:55,666
- "Who's there?" "Ali, and I'm shitty."
- The shitty friend.
2033
01:38:55,668 --> 01:38:56,999
Yeah, the shitty friend.
2034
01:38:57,001 --> 01:38:58,931
Okay.
All right, I deserve that.
2035
01:38:59,168 --> 01:39:00,800
I deserve it all.
2036
01:39:01,301 --> 01:39:03,832
But I want to make that up
to you too, okay?
2037
01:39:03,834 --> 01:39:08,167
I promise
to prioritize my life better.
2038
01:39:08,368 --> 01:39:11,933
You mean more to me,
and I should treat you as such.
2039
01:39:11,935 --> 01:39:15,800
Because I really do love you
and I need you in my life, okay?
2040
01:39:21,969 --> 01:39:25,701
All right.
Margarita Mondays on me. Shit.
2041
01:39:28,436 --> 01:39:29,568
Forever?
2042
01:39:31,271 --> 01:39:32,568
Mm-hmm.
2043
01:39:32,570 --> 01:39:34,335
- I'm about to get fired.
- I don't care.
2044
01:39:34,337 --> 01:39:36,603
I say if she wants
to pay for Margarita Mondays,
2045
01:39:36,605 --> 01:39:38,103
let's let her do it.
2046
01:39:38,105 --> 01:39:39,802
That's my cheat day
and you're gonna pay.
2047
01:39:39,804 --> 01:39:41,169
- Okay.
- You will pay.
2048
01:39:41,171 --> 01:39:42,803
- Thank you.
- Okay, let's toast.
2049
01:39:42,805 --> 01:39:44,538
- We need to make a toast.
- Give it to her!
2050
01:39:44,540 --> 01:39:46,169
We need to make a toast, come on.
2051
01:39:46,171 --> 01:39:47,669
We'll toast, we'll toast.
We'll get some more.
2052
01:39:47,671 --> 01:39:50,571
To my three best friends.
2053
01:39:50,906 --> 01:39:52,103
- Yes!
- Cheers!
2054
01:39:56,574 --> 01:39:59,670
This is the 2018 NBA Draft,
2055
01:39:59,672 --> 01:40:04,037
and commissioner Adam Silver is
about to step to the microphone.
2056
01:40:09,573 --> 01:40:12,339
Good evening,
and welcome to the NBA Draft.
2057
01:40:12,774 --> 01:40:16,638
These young men here tonight
represent the future of our sport.
2058
01:40:17,075 --> 01:40:20,806
With the first pick
in the 2018 NBA Draft,
2059
01:40:20,808 --> 01:40:22,338
the Atlanta Hawks select...
2060
01:40:23,342 --> 01:40:27,306
Jamal Barry from Georgia Tech.
2061
01:40:29,506 --> 01:40:32,404
- Thanks for making this happen.
- So proud of you.
2062
01:40:54,742 --> 01:40:56,340
Hey, hey, there she is!
2063
01:40:56,609 --> 01:40:58,874
The worst thing to happen
to US-China relations
2064
01:40:58,876 --> 01:41:01,607
since Richard Nixon
shot and ate a panda.
2065
01:41:03,076 --> 01:41:06,808
Joe, I really want you
on my team, okay?
2066
01:41:07,510 --> 01:41:09,108
How about we work together
2067
01:41:09,110 --> 01:41:12,842
to make sure Jamal
has an amazing career.
2068
01:41:12,844 --> 01:41:14,043
How about that?
2069
01:41:16,244 --> 01:41:18,309
- I like you.
- Thanks.
2070
01:41:18,311 --> 01:41:21,909
- See Jamal? That's my dude.
- Mm-hmm.
2071
01:41:21,911 --> 01:41:23,341
And you know dudes.
2072
01:41:24,944 --> 01:41:27,776
Well, that's the first time
I've heard that.
2073
01:41:31,879 --> 01:41:34,342
Well, first order of business.
2074
01:41:34,812 --> 01:41:38,343
I guess we can all see that
Ethan has rejoined the team.
2075
01:41:38,678 --> 01:41:41,511
And we have dropped our lawsuit
accordingly.
2076
01:41:41,513 --> 01:41:43,612
Listen, guys,
that unfortunate China incident
2077
01:41:43,614 --> 01:41:47,845
was brought on, if you can believe
it, by clear braces. Uh...
2078
01:41:48,381 --> 01:41:52,911
Excessive salivation led to
dehydration, exhaustion, and stress.
2079
01:41:52,913 --> 01:41:54,879
- You know.
- But I'm great now.
2080
01:41:54,881 --> 01:41:56,280
Happy to be back.
2081
01:41:56,282 --> 01:41:58,011
Ethan's no longer a partner.
2082
01:41:58,013 --> 01:42:00,511
And he'll be subject
to a yearly probationary review.
2083
01:42:01,782 --> 01:42:03,145
Now, with that being said,
2084
01:42:03,414 --> 01:42:06,746
seems like we have
a partner slot that has opened.
2085
01:42:07,715 --> 01:42:10,145
Or shall I say... "had."
2086
01:42:12,783 --> 01:42:15,346
I think we all know
what this is.
2087
01:42:15,881 --> 01:42:18,679
And I think we all know
who deserves it.
2088
01:42:19,449 --> 01:42:21,345
Let's give it up
for our newest partner:
2089
01:42:21,716 --> 01:42:23,080
Ali Davis.
2090
01:42:42,916 --> 01:42:45,479
Wow. Thanks. Thanks.
2091
01:42:45,948 --> 01:42:47,879
Thanks so much, Nick.
2092
01:42:50,850 --> 01:42:53,315
For so many years,
all I ever wanted
2093
01:42:53,317 --> 01:42:56,650
was to be a part
of this boys club.
2094
01:42:56,984 --> 01:42:58,347
It's all I ever wanted.
2095
01:43:04,051 --> 01:43:05,450
And...
2096
01:43:07,584 --> 01:43:11,550
I don't want to be
a part of your club anymore.
2097
01:43:13,885 --> 01:43:17,449
No, from now on, my self-worth
2098
01:43:18,085 --> 01:43:21,549
is not going to come
from a man's approval.
2099
01:43:24,219 --> 01:43:25,217
No.
2100
01:43:26,719 --> 01:43:29,318
I am going to compete and win
2101
01:43:29,320 --> 01:43:31,951
on my own terms, not yours.
2102
01:43:32,354 --> 01:43:35,951
So, I'm opening my own agency.
2103
01:43:38,221 --> 01:43:39,819
I'm sorry,
what's happening here?
2104
01:43:39,821 --> 01:43:41,685
Oh, calm down, Nick.
Have a Fiji.
2105
01:43:41,687 --> 01:43:43,887
I will come after
your clients hard!
2106
01:43:43,889 --> 01:43:45,252
Calm your nuts!
2107
01:43:45,254 --> 01:43:47,586
Look, you do very well
in your lane, Nick.
2108
01:43:47,588 --> 01:43:48,919
So, stay in it.
2109
01:43:48,921 --> 01:43:52,552
Oh, and, uh,
my partner is going to be...
2110
01:43:52,554 --> 01:43:53,453
Uh!
2111
01:43:55,155 --> 01:43:58,319
What? Wait, bro. No way!
2112
01:43:58,989 --> 01:44:00,319
I'm with her.
2113
01:44:00,321 --> 01:44:03,187
Okay, so on that note,
we're out.
2114
01:44:03,189 --> 01:44:06,288
Um, and we would like
to wish you the best
2115
01:44:06,290 --> 01:44:08,156
in all of your future endeavors,
2116
01:44:08,158 --> 01:44:09,688
i.e., go fuck yourself.
2117
01:44:09,956 --> 01:44:11,821
And kiss my black ass.
2118
01:44:11,823 --> 01:44:12,888
Let's go.
2119
01:44:12,890 --> 01:44:13,987
Hey, Nick.
2120
01:44:16,423 --> 01:44:18,256
Oh, there's one more box
at the front desk.
2121
01:44:18,258 --> 01:44:19,589
I'm gonna go grab it.
2122
01:44:20,092 --> 01:44:21,222
Okay.
2123
01:44:23,357 --> 01:44:26,222
The two of you are so cute
together, it's sickening.
2124
01:44:26,925 --> 01:44:28,921
Well, it's all thanks to you.
2125
01:44:28,923 --> 01:44:31,956
And I guess a little bit thanks
to that weird Sister lady.
2126
01:44:32,225 --> 01:44:34,789
Okay. Uh, so, all I need to
know now is where you'd like me
2127
01:44:34,791 --> 01:44:37,024
to make a reservation
for you and the other agents
2128
01:44:37,026 --> 01:44:38,124
to celebrate the new firm.
2129
01:44:38,126 --> 01:44:39,590
I took care of that.
2130
01:44:39,592 --> 01:44:41,257
I made reservations
for three at Pricci at 8:00.
2131
01:44:41,259 --> 01:44:43,224
- You made a reservation?
- Mm-hmm.
2132
01:44:43,226 --> 01:44:45,356
So, you, Kevin,
who's the third?
2133
01:44:45,726 --> 01:44:46,724
Oh, um...
2134
01:44:46,726 --> 01:44:47,924
Our new agent.
2135
01:44:48,293 --> 01:44:50,223
Um, you actually know this guy.
2136
01:44:50,427 --> 01:44:53,158
He's cute, he's short,
about your height, wears your glasses.
2137
01:44:53,560 --> 01:44:56,624
Yeah, he's gonna make
one hell of an agent.
2138
01:44:57,358 --> 01:44:59,656
I'm gonna be a...
You're making me a...
2139
01:45:00,658 --> 01:45:03,022
I'm just gonna take a second
and try to read your mind
2140
01:45:03,024 --> 01:45:04,489
and see if you're
fucking with me,
2141
01:45:04,491 --> 01:45:06,156
which would be
unbelievably cruel. But...
2142
01:45:06,491 --> 01:45:08,290
I think you're being serious.
Is this for real?
2143
01:45:08,292 --> 01:45:10,022
Yes, and it's long overdue.
2144
01:45:11,325 --> 01:45:13,224
Permission to pick you up
and spin you around?
2145
01:45:13,226 --> 01:45:15,124
I think I'm gonna regret this,
but okay.
2146
01:45:15,126 --> 01:45:17,192
Ah! Thank you so much!
Thank you, thank you!
2147
01:45:17,194 --> 01:45:19,158
Okay, wait a minute!
Hold on! Put me down.
2148
01:45:19,659 --> 01:45:20,889
Listen, listen, listen.
2149
01:45:21,326 --> 01:45:24,058
- Agents don't speak in that high tone.
- Hey!
2150
01:45:24,060 --> 01:45:26,058
Hey, what'd I miss?
What happened?
2151
01:45:26,528 --> 01:45:28,558
- Ali's making me an agent.
- Yeah.
2152
01:45:29,327 --> 01:45:30,660
That's so hot, bro.
2153
01:45:31,295 --> 01:45:32,825
- Stop!
- Oh!
2154
01:45:34,094 --> 01:45:37,059
Oh, my God. Congrats.
2155
01:45:40,896 --> 01:45:42,294
Yeah, that's what's up.
2156
01:45:43,129 --> 01:45:44,859
- Yeah.
- Feel me. That's what's up, man.
2157
01:45:45,060 --> 01:45:45,958
Dope!
2158
01:45:46,328 --> 01:45:48,061
Ooh, yes! Damn.
2159
01:45:48,063 --> 01:45:49,360
That's what's up.
2160
01:45:51,196 --> 01:45:52,960
All right,
who wants more cupcakes?
2161
01:45:52,962 --> 01:45:54,428
Me! Me! Me!
2162
01:45:54,430 --> 01:45:56,628
Wait, wait, wait. One at a time.
2163
01:45:57,830 --> 01:46:00,228
Um, uh... Bridget, would you...
2164
01:46:02,331 --> 01:46:04,427
Birthday cake delivery
for Ben.
2165
01:46:04,429 --> 01:46:07,162
- Ali, you remembered.
- Yes.
2166
01:46:07,164 --> 01:46:09,728
- That's a sports Turbo S.
- It is.
2167
01:46:09,730 --> 01:46:12,763
Maybe you can take a ride
in a real one someday.
2168
01:46:12,765 --> 01:46:14,994
Uh, Shonda,
would you mind taking the...
2169
01:46:15,831 --> 01:46:18,362
- Good to see you.
- Come with me, Ben.
2170
01:46:21,631 --> 01:46:23,629
Come on, kids.
Cake outside.
2171
01:46:24,232 --> 01:46:25,464
Can we talk?
2172
01:46:30,433 --> 01:46:32,532
I'm so sorry to show up
unannounced like this,
2173
01:46:32,534 --> 01:46:35,663
but I promised Ben
a birthday cake
2174
01:46:35,665 --> 01:46:38,030
and I wanted to honor
that promise.
2175
01:46:42,934 --> 01:46:44,532
And now I'll go.
2176
01:46:46,067 --> 01:46:47,131
Thank you.
2177
01:46:48,501 --> 01:46:52,131
But you do know that one grand
gesture doesn't just rewrite history.
2178
01:46:56,335 --> 01:46:58,199
Will, that night I met you...
2179
01:46:59,334 --> 01:47:02,467
I was afraid
that everything that I wanted
2180
01:47:02,469 --> 01:47:04,332
was being taken from me.
2181
01:47:06,302 --> 01:47:07,499
I've been there.
2182
01:47:08,636 --> 01:47:12,334
I was angry, and I disrespected
you, and that was wrong.
2183
01:47:14,402 --> 01:47:16,099
You see, I never...
2184
01:47:16,401 --> 01:47:19,299
considered what a man wants
or how he feels,
2185
01:47:19,301 --> 01:47:20,965
just as long as I won.
2186
01:47:21,535 --> 01:47:23,264
But what I've learned is that...
2187
01:47:23,701 --> 01:47:27,399
winning really doesn't matter
if you're a horrible person.
2188
01:47:28,201 --> 01:47:29,699
And you taught me that.
2189
01:47:30,668 --> 01:47:33,399
And I want to thank you
from the bottom of my heart.
2190
01:47:36,203 --> 01:47:37,434
Cool.
2191
01:47:38,803 --> 01:47:42,400
- Cool.
- Look, I know a lot has changed,
2192
01:47:42,638 --> 01:47:43,534
and so fast,
2193
01:47:44,637 --> 01:47:47,735
but, um...
I would really like a second chance.
2194
01:47:47,737 --> 01:47:50,102
And I understand if you say no.
2195
01:47:53,737 --> 01:47:56,502
- It's your third chance.
- Third? Oh, third.
2196
01:47:56,504 --> 01:47:58,303
It's... it's your third chance.
2197
01:47:58,305 --> 01:48:02,202
Shit, third.
Okay, well...
2198
01:48:02,204 --> 01:48:04,367
I like to believe
three's a charm.
2199
01:48:05,137 --> 01:48:06,969
But I totally respect...
2200
01:48:08,239 --> 01:48:09,903
- your decision.
- I, uh...
2201
01:48:19,072 --> 01:48:20,273
Okay. Okay.
2202
01:48:20,275 --> 01:48:21,939
But on one condition.
2203
01:48:22,506 --> 01:48:24,505
Look, I need to know
everything you're thinking.
2204
01:48:24,507 --> 01:48:26,072
- Everything. The truth.
- Oh!
2205
01:48:26,074 --> 01:48:27,572
No matter how hard.
2206
01:48:29,707 --> 01:48:30,605
Negotiation.
2207
01:48:31,675 --> 01:48:33,373
That's something I promise you
I'm really good at.
2208
01:48:33,375 --> 01:48:35,706
Oh, don't you worry.
You ain't getting off easy.
2209
01:48:36,507 --> 01:48:38,072
Oh, you're not.
2210
01:48:38,508 --> 01:48:40,906
I'm taking Ben to the park after this.
Hang out.
2211
01:48:46,075 --> 01:48:49,107
When you were my age,
what did you want to be?
2212
01:48:49,109 --> 01:48:52,239
Mm, I wanted to be a boxer,
believe it or not.
2213
01:48:52,675 --> 01:48:55,172
Interesting.
2214
01:48:57,143 --> 01:48:58,607
Which do you like better,
2215
01:48:58,609 --> 01:49:01,442
Porsche Turbo S
or a used Subaru?
2216
01:49:01,644 --> 01:49:04,341
Uh, I would have to say
a Porsche.
2217
01:49:04,343 --> 01:49:07,543
- Well, at least until my lease is up.
- Uh-huh.
2218
01:49:07,545 --> 01:49:08,774
- Makes sense.
- Yeah.
2219
01:49:10,710 --> 01:49:13,176
So, what are you thinking
of calling your new agency?
2220
01:49:13,178 --> 01:49:16,341
I'm thinking
Davis Athletics Management.
2221
01:49:16,343 --> 01:49:19,309
You do know,
abbreviated, that's DAM.
2222
01:49:19,311 --> 01:49:21,007
Like D-A-M. DAM.
2223
01:49:21,278 --> 01:49:22,975
- That's right.
- So you do know.
2224
01:49:23,179 --> 01:49:25,942
When people call,
I want the receptionist to say,
2225
01:49:25,944 --> 01:49:27,541
"DAM. How can I help you?"
2226
01:49:27,843 --> 01:49:30,374
- Aw, shit.
- No, that's "Aw, DAM."
2227
01:50:01,912 --> 01:50:02,976
Hold this with me.
2228
01:50:03,213 --> 01:50:04,578
Someone else is here with us.
2229
01:50:04,580 --> 01:50:06,010
Who is it?
2230
01:50:06,246 --> 01:50:07,779
- Mari.
- Yeah?
2231
01:50:08,413 --> 01:50:09,812
Mari, it's me.
2232
01:50:09,814 --> 01:50:10,845
Who is it?
2233
01:50:11,114 --> 01:50:12,645
Why did you do this to me, Mari?
2234
01:50:12,647 --> 01:50:15,044
Why didn't you mind your own
fucking business, Mari?
2235
01:50:15,046 --> 01:50:18,280
You put me behind bars
and I killed myself, Mari!
2236
01:50:18,282 --> 01:50:20,844
- Oh, shit.
- You're a fucking bitch, and I hate you!
2237
01:50:20,846 --> 01:50:22,944
Mm. Mm.
2238
01:50:23,247 --> 01:50:24,879
You're having some difficulties.
2239
01:50:24,881 --> 01:50:27,645
Don't beat me in the head
with that mystical bullshit.
2240
01:50:27,647 --> 01:50:30,613
You ain't no psychic.
I just came to buy some weed.
2241
01:50:30,615 --> 01:50:32,280
Well, why didn't you
say something?
2242
01:50:32,282 --> 01:50:34,814
- I thought you knew.
- Nigga, how much you need?
2243
01:50:34,816 --> 01:50:36,281
Before you start,
I just want to say
2244
01:50:36,283 --> 01:50:38,114
I'm allergic to tea. So...
2245
01:50:38,316 --> 01:50:39,380
Ha.
2246
01:50:39,382 --> 01:50:41,781
Not TJ Maxx.
2247
01:50:41,783 --> 01:50:43,447
'Cause I've seen
that robe there.
2248
01:51:02,417 --> 01:51:05,215
You're gonna rot in hell, Mari!
2249
01:51:05,217 --> 01:51:06,817
I don't want to go to hell.
2250
01:51:06,819 --> 01:51:08,349
You're a fucking bitch, Mari!
2251
01:51:08,351 --> 01:51:09,782
You're a fucking bitch!
2252
01:51:09,784 --> 01:51:12,217
- Mari, you're a fucking...
- Okay!
2253
01:51:12,219 --> 01:51:13,616
No, no. Go like that.
2254
01:51:13,618 --> 01:51:15,017
I feel like
maybe I need more nail.
2255
01:51:15,019 --> 01:51:16,417
No, like that.
2256
01:51:17,452 --> 01:51:18,950
Are you watching what I'm doing?
2257
01:51:18,952 --> 01:51:20,218
Who is your pastor?
2258
01:51:20,220 --> 01:51:22,118
I don't like to actually go
into church.
2259
01:51:22,120 --> 01:51:25,052
- Mm-hmm. Yeah.
- So I watch it on the television.
2260
01:51:25,352 --> 01:51:27,616
Who's ever on when I wake up.
2261
01:51:48,786 --> 01:51:51,617
- Are those prescription glasses?
- Oh, boy.
2262
01:51:51,619 --> 01:51:53,284
Now, I'ma tell you
one more time.
2263
01:51:53,754 --> 01:51:55,652
Look, you can't use
your privilege in here.
2264
01:51:55,654 --> 01:52:00,118
People who want to become
proficient in the fashion world,
2265
01:52:00,120 --> 01:52:01,984
they purchase gnomes.
2266
01:52:02,453 --> 01:52:04,486
- You see that?
- A gnome? Great.
2267
01:52:04,488 --> 01:52:05,986
You need to get that gnome.
2268
01:52:05,988 --> 01:52:08,717
Don't put it next to any kind
of costume jewelry.
2269
01:52:08,719 --> 01:52:10,852
Because it cancels it out
completely.
2270
01:52:10,854 --> 01:52:12,520
So everything you have on,
you need to put that
2271
01:52:12,522 --> 01:52:14,052
on the other side of the home.
2272
01:52:14,054 --> 01:52:16,886
- Well, I mean...
- I just have so many gifts.
2273
01:52:16,888 --> 01:52:20,485
- Yeah. Yeah.
- And it's hard to hone in on one.
2274
01:52:20,487 --> 01:52:23,519
But you know where...
I think I know what that gift really is.
2275
01:52:23,521 --> 01:52:25,719
- What, what, what?
- Okay.
2276
01:52:26,588 --> 01:52:27,787
- Women's...
- Women's...
2277
01:52:28,655 --> 01:52:30,419
- empowerment...
- empowerment...
2278
01:52:33,689 --> 01:52:36,354
- coaching, speaking,
- coaching, speaking,
2279
01:52:36,957 --> 01:52:38,721
- and comedy.
- and comedy?
2280
01:52:38,723 --> 01:52:40,687
- Get out of here!
- Baby, yes.
2281
01:52:40,689 --> 01:52:42,321
We are right here.
2282
01:52:42,323 --> 01:52:44,421
I'm also seeing
that you having
2283
01:52:44,423 --> 01:52:46,421
some trouble
with your penis.
2284
01:52:46,423 --> 01:52:49,590
What? Nah, nah,
that was cleared up years ago.
2285
01:52:49,592 --> 01:52:51,355
I'm sorry, it was upside-down.
2286
01:52:51,357 --> 01:52:53,322
- This is not your penis.
- Oh.
2287
01:52:53,324 --> 01:52:54,822
That's your nose.
2288
01:53:04,425 --> 01:53:07,624
That's a six. These are three
sixes in a row. You see?
2289
01:53:07,626 --> 01:53:08,890
- Ah!
- Mm-hmm.
2290
01:53:08,892 --> 01:53:10,789
That's, uh...
that's the devil.
2291
01:53:10,791 --> 01:53:13,024
- That's the devil.
- All right.
2292
01:53:13,026 --> 01:53:13,923
You're the devil.
2293
01:53:14,592 --> 01:53:17,257
When I first saw you,
I did not want to say it
2294
01:53:17,259 --> 01:53:18,758
in front of the other girls,
2295
01:53:18,960 --> 01:53:22,259
but there's something
more special about you.
2296
01:53:22,261 --> 01:53:23,892
- Yes. Yes!
- Mm-hmm.
2297
01:53:23,894 --> 01:53:26,592
You're amazing,
and there's something about you
2298
01:53:26,594 --> 01:53:29,093
that is better than
everything that I've seen.
2299
01:53:29,095 --> 01:53:31,426
- Stay in my life forever.
- Let me tell you something.
2300
01:53:31,428 --> 01:53:33,927
Listen.
I can put you in my book.
2301
01:53:33,929 --> 01:53:36,093
We can meet once a week
and do this.
2302
01:53:36,327 --> 01:53:37,459
I'd have to pay you.
2303
01:53:37,763 --> 01:53:40,194
- Oh, don't, don't.
- I would have to pay you.
2304
01:53:40,196 --> 01:53:42,327
- I insist on paying you.
- No, I don't. No.
2305
01:53:42,329 --> 01:53:45,760
I would like to prepay
ten sessions in advance.
2306
01:53:45,762 --> 01:53:47,659
- Cash only.
- Okay.
2307
01:53:56,763 --> 01:54:01,763
Subtitles by explosiveskull