1
00:00:14,097 --> 00:00:15,473
(BALL CRACKS AGAINST BAT)
2
00:00:16,348 --> 00:00:17,932
(CROWD CHATTERING)
3
00:00:21,352 --> 00:00:22,603
UMPIRE: Outside!
4
00:00:53,967 --> 00:00:55,468
(CROWD ROARS)
5
00:01:00,848 --> 00:01:02,766
We got one to go!
6
00:01:02,807 --> 00:01:05,142
One out to go! I'm yellin'.
7
00:01:07,644 --> 00:01:08,645
Okay!
8
00:01:09,145 --> 00:01:13,065
-Be careful with your ass, Brewster.
-We got two outs.
9
00:01:21,990 --> 00:01:23,992
-Come on, Rudy!
-Hit it, Rudy!
10
00:01:37,880 --> 00:01:40,173
-Foul ball!
-Aw, foul ball?
11
00:01:40,798 --> 00:01:44,259
Aw, you almost had that. I bet you feel
like a big piece of shit, don't you?
12
00:01:44,342 --> 00:01:46,010
Talk all you want, Porky.
13
00:01:47,553 --> 00:01:49,846
Here we go, Monty. Right into Porky's glove.
14
00:01:49,929 --> 00:01:51,722
Throw it in to Porky!
15
00:01:55,392 --> 00:01:56,393
Foul ball!
16
00:01:56,476 --> 00:01:58,352
CATCHER: Aw, foul ball again!
17
00:01:59,519 --> 00:02:00,561
It's all right, Rudy.
18
00:02:00,644 --> 00:02:02,187
Want me to have him
pitch underhanded to ya?
19
00:02:02,270 --> 00:02:04,522
Hey, I lettin' my bat do my talking, lard ass!
20
00:02:04,605 --> 00:02:07,024
-Oh, the bat's got the brains!
-Play ball.
21
00:02:07,107 --> 00:02:08,483
All right. I just want to figure it out!
22
00:02:08,524 --> 00:02:10,692
That's all. I want to know who's got
the brains in the family.
23
00:02:13,736 --> 00:02:15,696
-Time out!
-Time out?
24
00:02:17,030 --> 00:02:18,698
(HORN BLARING)
25
00:02:33,713 --> 00:02:34,922
-(GROANS)
-It's all right. It's all right.
26
00:02:35,005 --> 00:02:36,256
It's all right. It's all right.
27
00:02:36,339 --> 00:02:38,049
Come on, take it easy now.
Don't lose your concentration.
28
00:02:38,090 --> 00:02:39,174
Don't lose my concentration?
29
00:02:39,215 --> 00:02:41,091
The goddamned train's
coming through the outfield!
30
00:02:56,481 --> 00:02:58,316
BREWSTER: There's a guy
out there in the bleachers,
31
00:02:58,566 --> 00:03:00,985
front row, he's got a hat, camera.
32
00:03:01,068 --> 00:03:03,528
He's taking pictures of me
for the last three games.
33
00:03:06,572 --> 00:03:08,657
I'm tellin' ya.
I think he's a scout for the big leagues.
34
00:03:09,199 --> 00:03:11,784
Monty, this is Hackensack, New Jersey.
35
00:03:11,867 --> 00:03:14,077
No scout comes here, you understand?
36
00:03:14,368 --> 00:03:16,578
A train's goin' through the outfield right now.
37
00:03:16,744 --> 00:03:17,995
But if you strike this guy out,
38
00:03:18,078 --> 00:03:19,954
I'll take you with me tonight,
we'll get you drunk.
39
00:03:20,037 --> 00:03:23,040
That's a promise. Two outs. Two! Two!
40
00:03:23,832 --> 00:03:25,083
WOMAN: Play ball!
41
00:03:27,335 --> 00:03:29,795
Two outs. Two outs.
42
00:03:29,878 --> 00:03:31,546
He makes three.
43
00:03:36,092 --> 00:03:38,302
Look at him. He's a little rag doll!
44
00:03:45,767 --> 00:03:47,643
Knock it a long distance for me!
45
00:03:52,814 --> 00:03:54,524
Hey, old man, getting a little tired, huh?
46
00:03:54,607 --> 00:03:56,609
Get back to T-ball, buddy.
47
00:04:02,364 --> 00:04:04,574
Strike three! You're out!
48
00:04:09,287 --> 00:04:10,913
Big win! Yeah!
49
00:04:11,830 --> 00:04:13,915
All right. Big win!
50
00:04:15,291 --> 00:04:16,667
(POP SONG PLAYING OVER SPEAKERS)
51
00:04:16,750 --> 00:04:18,001
Constantly scheming
52
00:04:18,084 --> 00:04:20,044
Forever dreaming
53
00:04:20,127 --> 00:04:22,129
If I can't get what I want
54
00:04:22,212 --> 00:04:24,297
Life just ain't worth livin'
55
00:04:24,380 --> 00:04:25,547
No
56
00:04:27,340 --> 00:04:28,674
Hey, honey!
57
00:04:31,635 --> 00:04:35,805
Oh, living in materialistic reality
58
00:04:36,138 --> 00:04:39,599
Only taking what you want
Oh, don't you see
59
00:04:40,141 --> 00:04:43,227
Do you live in a materialistic reality
60
00:04:45,145 --> 00:04:48,231
I'm a gypsy.
That's why I'm not gonna bullshit you, okay?
61
00:04:48,314 --> 00:04:51,025
I could tell you, "I'll see you next year."
I'm not gonna see you next year.
62
00:04:51,108 --> 00:04:53,151
Because I'm gonna be playing
with the big leagues.
63
00:04:53,192 --> 00:04:54,568
-Really?
-That's right.
64
00:04:55,193 --> 00:04:58,279
I don't know what team,
but you'll see me on television
65
00:04:58,320 --> 00:04:59,863
and you'll say to your friends,
66
00:04:59,946 --> 00:05:03,491
"I know that guy!
That's the guy that wanted to date me,
67
00:05:03,532 --> 00:05:05,492
"but, no, I was too stupid."
68
00:05:06,451 --> 00:05:08,786
Jake here. I'm in Hackensack.
69
00:05:08,827 --> 00:05:10,745
Ah, pretty much the same picture.
He was out drinkin'
70
00:05:10,828 --> 00:05:13,247
till 3:30 in a bar last night,
71
00:05:13,330 --> 00:05:16,166
then he picked up some girl
and took her back to the hotel.
72
00:05:16,207 --> 00:05:18,459
I figure tonight's agenda
looks about the same.
73
00:05:18,500 --> 00:05:20,835
He's in a bar celebrating his victory.
74
00:05:20,918 --> 00:05:22,252
Yeah, he was the winning pitcher today.
75
00:05:22,502 --> 00:05:25,004
Yeah, right now,
you're playing for Hackensack.
76
00:05:25,087 --> 00:05:28,048
So what are you doing in a Cubs jersey, huh?
77
00:05:28,131 --> 00:05:31,008
A Cubs jersey? What are you talkin' about?
Hey, what number is that?
78
00:05:31,049 --> 00:05:32,175
Says "35."
79
00:05:32,216 --> 00:05:33,842
That was my number when
I played with the Cubs.
80
00:05:33,925 --> 00:05:37,261
They were the only big league team
smart enough to let me play for 'em.
81
00:05:37,803 --> 00:05:40,847
Is he a good pitcher? He's enthusiastic.
82
00:05:41,931 --> 00:05:43,807
Kinda like a kid in a candy store,
you know what I mean?
83
00:05:45,183 --> 00:05:46,976
Excuse me. Excuse me.
84
00:05:47,309 --> 00:05:49,519
Cold beer here. Cold beer.
85
00:05:50,811 --> 00:05:53,438
There you go. Sorry I'm late. Allow me.
86
00:05:55,690 --> 00:05:58,025
-Attractive.
-Thank you very much.
87
00:06:00,652 --> 00:06:02,987
Look, just keep
your eye out for Rudy, will you?
88
00:06:03,028 --> 00:06:04,904
He doesn't exist. There is no Rudy.
89
00:06:05,279 --> 00:06:08,865
Yes, sir. I'll break the news to
him first thing tomorrow morning.
90
00:06:08,906 --> 00:06:10,866
No, sir, I won't lose sight of him.
91
00:06:11,241 --> 00:06:13,243
Let me tell you something about athletes.
92
00:06:13,534 --> 00:06:16,703
I mean, after a game,
we've got to relax, we gotta come down.
93
00:06:16,786 --> 00:06:18,746
Unwind. My doctor told me. He said,
94
00:06:18,829 --> 00:06:22,290
"Hey, Brewster.
Man, get a massage. Come down."
95
00:06:22,373 --> 00:06:25,542
We were reading in a medical journal
that was left in the locker room the other day,
96
00:06:25,583 --> 00:06:29,003
an article by this
Oriental doctor on massages.
97
00:06:29,044 --> 00:06:31,921
See, we in the West
give a massage like this, you know.
98
00:06:32,004 --> 00:06:34,840
And, uh, see, all the energy
coming from my hands
99
00:06:34,881 --> 00:06:36,340
is stopped by the fabric.
100
00:06:36,381 --> 00:06:40,468
Apparently we in the West don't know that,
and we're massagin' for nothin'.
101
00:06:40,718 --> 00:06:43,637
So his theory, and it's just a theory,
102
00:06:43,720 --> 00:06:47,181
is that if you're nude and you get a
massage, that's the best thing for ya.
103
00:06:47,323 --> 00:06:48,824
Good for your muscles, nude.
104
00:06:48,865 --> 00:06:50,533
We're wonderin' maybe you might like to, uh,
105
00:06:50,616 --> 00:06:52,659
try the theory nude with us.
106
00:06:52,742 --> 00:06:55,786
-The four of us nude would be great!
-Oh, that would be fun.
107
00:06:55,827 --> 00:06:57,495
-Massaging each other.
-Mmm-hmm.
108
00:06:57,912 --> 00:06:59,330
I think they're kind of cute.
109
00:06:59,830 --> 00:07:01,331
This one's especially cute.
110
00:07:01,539 --> 00:07:03,165
Either you guys got a car?
111
00:07:03,206 --> 00:07:04,248
-SPIKE: No.
-Got a bus!
112
00:07:04,331 --> 00:07:06,666
-The Bulls' bus. The team bus.
-Bigger than a car.
113
00:07:06,749 --> 00:07:08,709
Oh, much bigger and more fun,
114
00:07:08,792 --> 00:07:10,543
because he's the party-meister, himself.
115
00:07:10,626 --> 00:07:11,877
I'm the driver too.
116
00:07:11,960 --> 00:07:14,295
-Why don't we start in a bus?
-Why don't we try the bus?
117
00:07:14,336 --> 00:07:16,838
-Let's try the bus. Any left?
-We'll show you the bus.
118
00:07:16,921 --> 00:07:17,922
Any left?
119
00:07:18,756 --> 00:07:22,342
I'll try the bus.
A good place to start the evening off.
120
00:07:22,425 --> 00:07:26,429
You're gonna love this. We have a
big-screen TV. Well, we haven't got it yet.
121
00:07:26,512 --> 00:07:29,306
We got a space for a big-screen TV
I think you're gonna like.
122
00:07:32,517 --> 00:07:34,435
You know...
123
00:07:34,518 --> 00:07:35,852
Hi, guys.
124
00:07:38,980 --> 00:07:41,857
Uh. Rudy! Hi, Rudy, buddy!
125
00:07:45,527 --> 00:07:48,196
Get in the car before I twist your head off.
126
00:07:48,237 --> 00:07:49,821
I didn't do anything wrong, baby.
127
00:07:49,862 --> 00:07:51,488
They tried to pick us up.
128
00:07:51,529 --> 00:07:52,655
Bullshit!
129
00:07:52,696 --> 00:07:54,614
Shut up! You too. Get in the goddamned car!
130
00:07:54,697 --> 00:07:56,365
-Don't wanna get in the car.
-Hey, I wouldn't do that.
131
00:07:56,406 --> 00:07:59,367
-Uh, Rudy...
-Hey! Butt out, rag arm!
132
00:07:59,617 --> 00:08:00,951
Let's go, guys.
133
00:08:01,034 --> 00:08:02,577
Ha! We'll push your face!
134
00:08:02,827 --> 00:08:04,745
Yeah, police? This is Torchy's on J Street.
135
00:08:04,828 --> 00:08:06,788
You'd better send somebody down here.
There's gonna be a fight.
136
00:08:07,288 --> 00:08:09,081
(PEOPLE EXCLAIMING)
137
00:08:18,673 --> 00:08:19,715
Ooh!
138
00:08:19,798 --> 00:08:20,840
Ow!
139
00:08:22,716 --> 00:08:24,175
(WHISTLING)
140
00:08:27,636 --> 00:08:30,680
Why is it when there's trouble,
we're the ones that get into it?
141
00:08:30,721 --> 00:08:34,558
There was a bar full of people.
We're the only ones in jail.
142
00:08:34,641 --> 00:08:36,059
I don't think it's racial, you know,
143
00:08:36,100 --> 00:08:38,018
because I'm in here with you.
144
00:08:38,059 --> 00:08:39,351
That's comforting.
145
00:08:44,230 --> 00:08:45,689
CHARLEY: Hiya, fellas.
146
00:08:45,730 --> 00:08:47,231
-Charley.
-Hey, Charley.
147
00:08:47,272 --> 00:08:51,234
Look, I don't know what to say,
but I guess this is it.
148
00:08:51,734 --> 00:08:53,235
Charley, we apologized.
149
00:08:53,318 --> 00:08:55,653
Now cut the speeches,
and get us out of here, please.
150
00:08:55,736 --> 00:08:59,823
I can't do it, kid. The front office is
washing its hands of you two.
151
00:08:59,906 --> 00:09:03,200
There's no money for bail
and no money for your fines.
152
00:09:03,241 --> 00:09:05,576
They gave the both of you
your unconditional releases.
153
00:09:05,617 --> 00:09:07,785
SPIKE: That's just great.
Do they know what they're talking about?
154
00:09:07,868 --> 00:09:11,246
We got one game left.
If we win today, we're in the play-offs!
155
00:09:11,329 --> 00:09:13,831
It's simple. They don't want you guys.
156
00:09:13,914 --> 00:09:16,499
Next year,
they're going with the college draft choices.
157
00:09:16,582 --> 00:09:18,250
New talent. Young kids.
158
00:09:18,833 --> 00:09:20,626
Hey, look at it this way, Brewster.
159
00:09:20,709 --> 00:09:25,004
You're lucky.
You got to be a pro ballplayer for 15 years.
160
00:09:25,421 --> 00:09:27,423
That's a lot more than most people get.
161
00:09:28,632 --> 00:09:30,050
I'll see ya.
162
00:09:38,058 --> 00:09:39,768
Brewster and Nolan.
163
00:09:40,435 --> 00:09:43,187
Okay! You bozos are up to bat.
164
00:09:43,395 --> 00:09:45,939
In here. Let's go!
165
00:10:00,119 --> 00:10:01,954
Don't worry about a thing.
I'll take care of everything.
166
00:10:02,037 --> 00:10:03,747
-I know this kind of stuff.
-Don't mess up.
167
00:10:03,788 --> 00:10:05,164
Just smile.
168
00:10:08,458 --> 00:10:10,418
Thank you very much. (CHUCKLES)
169
00:10:10,960 --> 00:10:13,045
Mr. Brewster and Mr. Nolan,
170
00:10:13,628 --> 00:10:14,795
you're charged with assault and battery,
171
00:10:14,836 --> 00:10:16,128
(SPIKE CHUCKLES)
172
00:10:16,211 --> 00:10:20,465
resisting arrest, and destruction
of private property.
173
00:10:20,548 --> 00:10:22,550
How do you plead? Guilty or not guilty?
174
00:10:22,967 --> 00:10:24,718
Oh, guilty but with a real good excuse.
175
00:10:24,801 --> 00:10:26,886
You're gonna love it, really.
I think everyone here will.
176
00:10:26,969 --> 00:10:28,845
I plead innocent.
177
00:10:28,928 --> 00:10:31,013
You see, Your Honor, what you have here
178
00:10:31,096 --> 00:10:35,058
with Mr. Brewster and myself,
is a couple of, well, local heroes, really.
179
00:10:35,183 --> 00:10:39,979
We play for a local team. You might
have seen us. The Hackensack Bulls?
180
00:10:40,062 --> 00:10:42,189
Perhaps you know the... "Go, you Bulls, go."
181
00:10:42,272 --> 00:10:44,232
Let's not waste the court's time.
182
00:10:44,315 --> 00:10:47,651
I have depositions here
from over a dozen eyewitnesses.
183
00:10:47,692 --> 00:10:51,529
Your Honor, we went into the bar to
have a drink, and we saw this nice lady,
184
00:10:51,612 --> 00:10:53,822
and we asked her
to sit with us to have a drink,
185
00:10:53,863 --> 00:10:54,864
I didn't know she had a fiance.
186
00:10:54,947 --> 00:10:55,989
-Who knew?
-Did you know?
187
00:10:56,030 --> 00:10:58,615
-I didn't know. It wasn't public knowledge.
-I didn't know, either.
188
00:10:58,656 --> 00:11:02,910
So you were making advances to a woman
who was clearly involved with another man.
189
00:11:02,993 --> 00:11:06,204
You see, if you don't make calls,
you don't make any sales.
190
00:11:06,287 --> 00:11:07,496
(LAUGHS)
191
00:11:07,537 --> 00:11:08,913
This man does not
represent me, Your Honor.
192
00:11:08,996 --> 00:11:11,081
I would remove that from the court records.
I would...
193
00:11:11,164 --> 00:11:14,250
I'm going to set your bail at $3,000.
194
00:11:14,458 --> 00:11:16,042
-(BREWSTER GROANS)
-SPIKE: Not bad.
195
00:11:16,125 --> 00:11:18,669
-We don't have $3,000.
-We don't.
196
00:11:18,710 --> 00:11:21,546
Bailiff, will you remove the prisoners?
Next case.
197
00:11:21,629 --> 00:11:24,173
Your Honor, wait.
Please, before you send us to jail...
198
00:11:24,214 --> 00:11:26,549
Look, I tried to defend myself.
The man hit me first.
199
00:11:26,632 --> 00:11:27,633
(BOTH SHOUTING)
200
00:11:27,674 --> 00:11:28,716
With the permission of the court...
201
00:11:28,799 --> 00:11:30,967
My name is J.B. Donaldo,
202
00:11:31,008 --> 00:11:34,886
and I'm representing parties who
wish to remain anonymous at this time
203
00:11:34,969 --> 00:11:38,239
and who have instructed me
to post bail for the defendants
204
00:11:38,280 --> 00:11:41,783
or pay any fines levied
in case they plead guilty,
205
00:11:41,866 --> 00:11:43,784
which I'm sure they will now do.
206
00:11:44,159 --> 00:11:46,119
-Yeah. Who is he?
-It's the scout.
207
00:11:46,202 --> 00:11:47,244
(LAUGHING) Oh, yeah.
208
00:11:47,285 --> 00:11:49,578
I told you they want me.
209
00:11:50,161 --> 00:11:53,581
-They want me. We're goin' to the big time!
-This is it.
210
00:11:53,789 --> 00:11:56,291
-BREWSTER: So where to, J.B.?
-J.B.: New York.
211
00:11:56,332 --> 00:11:59,668
BREWSTER: New York? Yeehaw!
212
00:11:59,751 --> 00:12:01,252
The Mets!
213
00:12:36,870 --> 00:12:38,830
I knew it! I knew it!
214
00:12:38,913 --> 00:12:41,206
There's no Mets in here! Wait a minute.
215
00:12:41,831 --> 00:12:43,457
Don't go in there.
There's no Mets in this building!
216
00:12:43,498 --> 00:12:45,500
I never said anything about the Mets.
Mr. Brewster did.
217
00:12:45,583 --> 00:12:47,626
I was just hired
to find him and bring him here.
218
00:12:47,667 --> 00:12:49,794
This is not a scout. He's a cop, Monty.
That's what he is.
219
00:12:49,835 --> 00:12:52,629
He's a cop. Look at him.
Look at those cheap cop shoes,
220
00:12:52,670 --> 00:12:56,090
cop face, cop hat, cop shirt, cop eyes!
221
00:12:56,548 --> 00:12:58,341
Monty, the Mets don't want you, all right?
222
00:12:58,382 --> 00:13:00,425
Hell, the Hackensack Bulls
don't even want ya.
223
00:13:00,508 --> 00:13:03,677
Look, I ain't supposed
to tell you this, but here's who hired me.
224
00:13:03,760 --> 00:13:07,263
Granville and Baxter. As far as I know, they
got nothin' to do with the Mets.
225
00:13:07,888 --> 00:13:09,306
It's goin' great.
226
00:13:15,145 --> 00:13:16,771
It's the Yankees.
227
00:13:17,938 --> 00:13:19,606
-Mr. Brewster?
-Right.
228
00:13:20,440 --> 00:13:22,608
-We've been expected you.
-The arm's okay.
229
00:13:22,691 --> 00:13:25,193
-Beg your pardon?
-The operation was a success.
230
00:13:25,276 --> 00:13:27,361
The arm's two years old now.
231
00:13:28,445 --> 00:13:29,779
Follow me, please.
232
00:13:31,322 --> 00:13:32,364
Wait for me.
233
00:13:53,635 --> 00:13:55,053
Mr. Brewster's here.
234
00:13:55,136 --> 00:13:58,055
-Mr. Brewster? I'm Ed Roundfield.
-Yeah.
235
00:13:58,555 --> 00:14:00,598
This is Mr. George Granville.
Mr. Norris Baxter.
236
00:14:00,681 --> 00:14:01,682
-How do you do?
-Hi.
237
00:14:01,723 --> 00:14:02,765
How do you do?
238
00:14:02,848 --> 00:14:04,891
Perhaps you'd better sit down, Mr. Brewster.
239
00:14:04,974 --> 00:14:07,977
What I'm about to tell you
may come as quite a shock.
240
00:14:08,060 --> 00:14:10,395
No, sir. I don't want to sit down.
I want to hear this standing up.
241
00:14:10,478 --> 00:14:13,439
-Have you ever heard the name Rupert Horn?
-Rupert Horn.
242
00:14:14,189 --> 00:14:17,650
No. I bet he's someone
high up in the Yankee organization, right?
243
00:14:17,733 --> 00:14:20,527
I'm afraid not, Mr. Brewster.
Rupert Horn was your great-uncle.
244
00:14:20,985 --> 00:14:22,653
What's that got to do with baseball?
245
00:14:22,736 --> 00:14:25,363
Rupert Horn quarreled
with his family back in the '30s.
246
00:14:25,404 --> 00:14:26,780
He went out West.
247
00:14:26,863 --> 00:14:29,699
They never heard from him again.
They thought he was dead.
248
00:14:29,740 --> 00:14:31,742
But he didn't die until last month.
249
00:14:32,117 --> 00:14:35,078
And by then, he was
one of the richest men in America.
250
00:14:35,661 --> 00:14:37,079
And he bought a baseball team, right?
251
00:14:37,162 --> 00:14:39,164
No, oil and real estate.
252
00:14:39,247 --> 00:14:43,376
And you, Mr. Brewster, are the sole living heir
of your great-uncle, Rupert Horn.
253
00:14:43,751 --> 00:14:47,880
I think it's only fair to tell Mr. Brewster
about the conditions of the will.
254
00:14:51,425 --> 00:14:54,177
Brewster, greetings from the grave.
255
00:14:54,260 --> 00:14:55,552
Don't look so surprised.
256
00:14:55,593 --> 00:14:58,596
Didn't you know
your great-grandfather was a honky?
257
00:14:58,637 --> 00:15:02,932
The old man married twice.
One wife, white, produced me.
258
00:15:03,807 --> 00:15:06,601
One wife, black, produced your grandmother.
259
00:15:07,268 --> 00:15:09,228
A checkered family, you might say.
260
00:15:09,269 --> 00:15:11,771
I've outlived them all, except you.
261
00:15:12,772 --> 00:15:15,649
They tell me you're
my only living relative, Brewster.
262
00:15:15,732 --> 00:15:17,942
And I got to say I'm very disappointed.
Look at you!
263
00:15:18,025 --> 00:15:22,362
What have you made of yourself?
A failed baseball player.
264
00:15:22,737 --> 00:15:25,948
I believe in being honest, Brewster.
No bullshit.
265
00:15:26,615 --> 00:15:28,325
I'm stuck with you.
266
00:15:29,784 --> 00:15:33,329
But we're going to have some fun.
267
00:15:34,788 --> 00:15:36,164
(WHEEZING LAUGH)
268
00:15:39,584 --> 00:15:40,960
(GASPING)
269
00:15:45,005 --> 00:15:46,589
Let me... (GASPS)
270
00:15:46,630 --> 00:15:49,591
Let me tell you a little story, Brewster.
271
00:15:50,883 --> 00:15:52,467
When I was seven years old,
272
00:15:52,508 --> 00:15:54,968
my daddy caught me smokin' a cigar.
273
00:15:56,511 --> 00:15:58,971
Locked me in the closet for
three days and three nights
274
00:15:59,054 --> 00:16:02,474
with nothin' but
a box of cigars and a book of matches.
275
00:16:03,099 --> 00:16:06,560
No food, Brewster.
No water, just those goddamned cigars.
276
00:16:06,643 --> 00:16:09,729
Wouldn't let me out
until I finished every last one.
277
00:16:09,812 --> 00:16:11,188
Taught me one hell of a lesson.
278
00:16:11,271 --> 00:16:14,732
I'm going to do to you
what my daddy did to me.
279
00:16:15,107 --> 00:16:18,068
I'm gonna teach you to hate spending money.
280
00:16:18,151 --> 00:16:19,819
I'm gonna make you
so sick of spending money
281
00:16:19,902 --> 00:16:23,989
that the mere sight of it
will make you want to throw up.
282
00:16:24,072 --> 00:16:26,407
So, here's my proposition.
283
00:16:27,825 --> 00:16:31,662
You have 30 days in which
to spend 30 million bucks.
284
00:16:32,996 --> 00:16:36,290
If you can do it, you get 300 million.
285
00:16:36,331 --> 00:16:37,582
There's gotta be a catch.
286
00:16:37,665 --> 00:16:39,500
Of course there's a catch.
287
00:16:39,541 --> 00:16:41,668
You have to spend the 30 million,
288
00:16:41,709 --> 00:16:45,879
but after 30 days, you're
not allowed to own any assets.
289
00:16:45,962 --> 00:16:48,005
No houses, no cars, no jewelry,
290
00:16:48,171 --> 00:16:50,631
nothin' but the shirt on your back.
291
00:16:51,590 --> 00:16:53,633
Sounds easy, don't it?
292
00:16:53,674 --> 00:16:56,593
Well, you'll find out!
293
00:16:56,676 --> 00:16:59,512
(GASPING) No, no, no, no.
294
00:17:00,346 --> 00:17:01,347
Now...
295
00:17:02,681 --> 00:17:04,683
You can hire anybody you want,
296
00:17:04,766 --> 00:17:06,642
but you got to get value for their services.
297
00:17:06,683 --> 00:17:09,060
You can donate 5% to charity,
298
00:17:09,143 --> 00:17:12,062
and you can gamble another 5% away,
299
00:17:12,145 --> 00:17:14,188
but you can't give this money away.
300
00:17:14,271 --> 00:17:15,855
And that includes buying the Hope Diamond
301
00:17:15,938 --> 00:17:18,523
for some bimbo as a birthday present.
302
00:17:20,942 --> 00:17:23,903
I know what you're thinking, Brewster.
303
00:17:23,986 --> 00:17:26,238
You'll buy yourself a dozen Picassos
304
00:17:26,321 --> 00:17:28,323
and use them for firewood, right?
305
00:17:28,573 --> 00:17:31,951
Wrong! You must not destroy
306
00:17:32,135 --> 00:17:33,511
what is inherently valuable.
307
00:17:33,594 --> 00:17:35,470
That's instant disqualification.
308
00:17:36,387 --> 00:17:38,847
Oh, yeah. I almost forgot.
309
00:17:40,265 --> 00:17:42,183
You're not allowed to tell anybody
310
00:17:42,266 --> 00:17:44,184
why you have to spend this money.
311
00:17:44,267 --> 00:17:45,685
Why can't I tell my friends?
312
00:17:46,102 --> 00:17:47,978
Because I don't want
anybody helpin' you out!
313
00:17:48,061 --> 00:17:51,439
Nobody helped me out
in that closet with those cigars.
314
00:17:51,814 --> 00:17:52,981
I never had any friends.
315
00:17:54,649 --> 00:17:58,235
Well, Brewster, what do you think?
You got the balls for it?
316
00:18:00,362 --> 00:18:05,158
I doubt it. That's why I put a
special wimp clause in my will.
317
00:18:06,075 --> 00:18:09,411
You can have a million dollars,
right now, forget the whole thing.
318
00:18:09,911 --> 00:18:12,872
Or you can go for the big one, Brewster.
319
00:18:13,330 --> 00:18:15,623
The 300 million.
320
00:18:16,040 --> 00:18:17,666
But if you fail,
321
00:18:18,833 --> 00:18:21,669
you don't get diddly.
322
00:18:30,886 --> 00:18:33,263
This is the million dollars
your great-uncle spoke about.
323
00:18:33,346 --> 00:18:37,308
Oh, Jesus!
I've never seen that much money in my life!
324
00:18:37,558 --> 00:18:40,727
We've investigated your background,
Mr. Brewster.
325
00:18:41,102 --> 00:18:44,355
The highest salary you've ever had is $11,000
326
00:18:44,396 --> 00:18:46,898
for one season with the Toledo Mud Hens.
327
00:18:46,981 --> 00:18:50,025
You've never
had a credit card in your entire life.
328
00:18:50,525 --> 00:18:53,694
Think of spending
a million dollars a day for 30 days
329
00:18:53,777 --> 00:18:55,737
with no assets to show for it.
330
00:18:56,112 --> 00:18:59,698
It's quite difficult
to spend money without accumulating assets,
331
00:19:00,281 --> 00:19:01,865
even when the money is spent foolishly.
332
00:19:01,948 --> 00:19:06,744
Surely, no one could blame you for
refusing such an eccentric gamble.
333
00:19:06,827 --> 00:19:10,080
That's good advice. Take the million.
334
00:19:10,705 --> 00:19:11,706
It's yours!
335
00:19:12,373 --> 00:19:15,459
What happens if I don't take
the million dollars and I,
336
00:19:15,542 --> 00:19:18,044
I try for the whole thing and I fail?
337
00:19:18,127 --> 00:19:21,130
Granville and Baxter would gain
power of attorney over the estate.
338
00:19:21,213 --> 00:19:23,632
They would administer it
in some charitable fashion
339
00:19:23,840 --> 00:19:26,342
for a considerable fee, I'm sure.
340
00:19:26,717 --> 00:19:29,678
-What do you think?
-I don't benefit either way, Mr. Brewster.
341
00:19:30,261 --> 00:19:32,221
I'm a completely neutral observer.
342
00:19:37,851 --> 00:19:41,020
Whew. "Bird in the hand..."
343
00:19:41,729 --> 00:19:44,356
That's what my grandmother used to say.
344
00:19:53,740 --> 00:19:55,658
I'm gonna go for the 300 million.
345
00:19:55,741 --> 00:20:00,370
When you appear before us again in 30 days,
Mr. Brewster, you must be totally penniless,
346
00:20:00,411 --> 00:20:02,413
without assets of any kind,
347
00:20:02,496 --> 00:20:05,832
having nothing but the receipt for your
expenses and the clothes on your back.
348
00:20:05,915 --> 00:20:08,417
Are you certain
you want to do this, Mr. Brewster?
349
00:20:08,458 --> 00:20:11,752
No, sir, I'm not certain,
but I'm gonna have a lot of fun findin' out.
350
00:20:11,793 --> 00:20:13,461
-(INTERCOM CLICKS)
-Send Drake up here immediately.
351
00:20:13,544 --> 00:20:16,255
Good luck, sir. You're due back in 30 days.
352
00:20:16,546 --> 00:20:18,422
-(CLOCK CHIMING)
-Gentlemen, shall we say...
353
00:20:19,005 --> 00:20:21,257
...12:00 midnight exactly?
354
00:20:21,507 --> 00:20:23,884
We're going to assign one of our paralegals
355
00:20:23,925 --> 00:20:28,095
from the accounting department to keep track
of your expenditures and receipts.
356
00:20:28,136 --> 00:20:30,012
Does this guy Drake know
about the 300 million?
357
00:20:30,095 --> 00:20:33,431
All Drake knows
is that you've inherited $30 million
358
00:20:33,472 --> 00:20:36,349
which must be precisely accounted for.
359
00:20:36,432 --> 00:20:40,978
You tell Drake the truth, you'll automatically
lose the entire inheritance.
360
00:20:41,061 --> 00:20:43,813
I ain't tellin' Drake shit. My lips are sealed.
361
00:20:43,896 --> 00:20:46,189
Lock them.
Throw away the key. "Hello, Drake."
362
00:20:46,272 --> 00:20:49,608
This is the way I'll talk.
"How are you doing, Drake?"
363
00:20:49,691 --> 00:20:54,237
Miss Drake. This is Mr. Brewster,
the client we briefed you about.
364
00:20:55,780 --> 00:20:59,492
Oh, yes, Mr. Brewster.
It's very nice to meet you.
365
00:20:59,575 --> 00:21:02,661
-Damn. It doesn't rain, it pours.
-I beg your pardon?
366
00:21:02,744 --> 00:21:06,122
The $30 million is deposited
in a bank across the street.
367
00:21:06,205 --> 00:21:08,290
I imagine you'd like to make sure it's real
368
00:21:08,373 --> 00:21:10,124
and possibly make a withdrawal.
369
00:21:10,207 --> 00:21:14,294
-Yeah, I'd like to make sure it's real.
-Step this way, please.
370
00:21:14,335 --> 00:21:16,295
-Hey, good luck.
-Yes, sir.
371
00:21:23,010 --> 00:21:25,554
-Spike! Spike!
-What's wrong? What's wrong?
372
00:21:25,887 --> 00:21:27,680
-What's wrong? Are you all right?
-Spike! Spike!
373
00:21:27,763 --> 00:21:31,016
-You look like you've seen a ghost!
-I did! But I'm not.
374
00:21:31,099 --> 00:21:32,642
I'm okay. It's gonna be great.
375
00:21:32,683 --> 00:21:33,684
We're gonna be back on the team.
376
00:21:33,767 --> 00:21:35,393
-In fact, I may own the team.
-What?
377
00:21:35,476 --> 00:21:37,102
Yeah, I'm gonna be a little crazy for a while.
378
00:21:37,143 --> 00:21:38,853
But I'm not crazy.
People gonna think I'm crazy.
379
00:21:38,936 --> 00:21:40,103
You stick with me, you're my buddy.
380
00:21:40,144 --> 00:21:42,980
-You work here?
-No. No. They just hired me to follow you.
381
00:21:43,063 --> 00:21:46,357
Would you like to work for more money
than you ever made in your life?
382
00:21:46,440 --> 00:21:48,900
I mean, it's a job. It's gonna be...
383
00:21:48,983 --> 00:21:51,485
I gotta check out something,
see if it's real first. Are you interested?
384
00:21:51,568 --> 00:21:53,319
-Yeah! You kiddin'?
-Bring your camera.
385
00:21:53,402 --> 00:21:54,778
-Come on.
-What are you talking...
386
00:21:54,819 --> 00:21:56,570
Would you mind fillin' me in
on what the hell is going on?
387
00:21:56,653 --> 00:21:58,237
What's wrong?
What did they do to you in there?
388
00:21:58,320 --> 00:21:59,612
What do you mean,
what did they do to me in there?
389
00:21:59,653 --> 00:22:02,280
I think I just inherited $30 million!
390
00:22:03,823 --> 00:22:06,742
Oh, is that all?
I thought we did something wrong.
391
00:22:06,825 --> 00:22:09,160
$30 million.
Why didn't you tell me $30 million?
392
00:22:09,201 --> 00:22:10,785
$30 million? You kiddin' me?
393
00:22:12,036 --> 00:22:13,829
Like I'm gonna take money
from my best friend.
394
00:22:13,870 --> 00:22:15,329
Things like this just don't happen every day!
395
00:22:15,412 --> 00:22:17,997
This is incredible news! $30 million!
396
00:22:18,080 --> 00:22:21,500
The man just got $30 million given to him.
This is a good day.
397
00:22:21,541 --> 00:22:22,875
We're always gonna remember this day.
398
00:22:22,958 --> 00:22:26,169
$30 million! That makes us rich! Well, not us.
It makes him rich.
399
00:22:26,210 --> 00:22:28,045
What a great day we're havin'! Me?
400
00:22:28,128 --> 00:22:29,838
He's havin' a wonderful day! (LAUGHS)
401
00:22:29,879 --> 00:22:32,840
But I'm havin' a good time too!
I'm his best friend.
402
00:22:56,280 --> 00:22:57,656
Jesus!
403
00:22:58,865 --> 00:23:02,577
This is real... Money.
404
00:23:04,370 --> 00:23:07,039
Oh, we're gonna have
a lot of fun with this kind of money.
405
00:23:07,122 --> 00:23:08,456
(LAUGHS)
406
00:23:10,249 --> 00:23:11,458
This is the real deal.
407
00:23:11,541 --> 00:23:13,125
It is, indeed, Mr. Brewster.
408
00:23:13,309 --> 00:23:14,935
Now let's not be rash with
our newfound money.
409
00:23:14,976 --> 00:23:16,018
Right.
410
00:23:16,101 --> 00:23:18,853
Jake, I'd like to hire you
as my official photographer.
411
00:23:18,936 --> 00:23:22,022
-Salary $10,000 a week.
-$10,000 a week? This guy's a jerk!
412
00:23:22,105 --> 00:23:24,440
Hey, shut up. I accept. (CHUCKLES)
413
00:23:25,149 --> 00:23:27,359
Hey, hold still for the camera, Mr. Brewster.
414
00:23:28,651 --> 00:23:31,820
Not bad for a guy that didn't finish his first
year of college, wouldn't you say?
415
00:23:31,903 --> 00:23:33,738
Oh, you're doing great, but, uh,
416
00:23:33,821 --> 00:23:36,657
I don't think you inherited me
with your money, Mr. Brewster.
417
00:23:36,698 --> 00:23:40,743
Needless to say, we'll be offering you
the special 24% interest rate
418
00:23:40,826 --> 00:23:44,454
we reserve for major corporations
and a few of our Arab friends.
419
00:23:44,871 --> 00:23:46,539
I don't want any interest!
420
00:23:46,622 --> 00:23:49,041
I want it in a regular account
that doesn't pay anything.
421
00:23:49,416 --> 00:23:51,709
After all, it's your vault.
I should be paying you rent.
422
00:23:51,792 --> 00:23:54,002
-Very good, Mr. Brewster.
-But Mr. Brewster...
423
00:23:54,085 --> 00:23:58,005
You'd be giving up
$7.2 million a year just in interest alone!
424
00:23:58,839 --> 00:24:01,675
Because I'm rich doesn't mean I should take
advantage of people. Am I right?
425
00:24:01,716 --> 00:24:04,510
Oh, yes. Right you are, Mr. Brewster.
426
00:24:04,551 --> 00:24:08,012
I'd like to get $3 million in cash
now and take it with me.
427
00:24:08,679 --> 00:24:11,515
$3 million? You know how much
money $3 million in cash is?
428
00:24:11,556 --> 00:24:13,516
You don't walk around
the street with $3 million!
429
00:24:13,599 --> 00:24:16,184
-You'd need an army of security guards.
-The man's right.
430
00:24:17,560 --> 00:24:18,602
What do they pay you here?
431
00:24:18,685 --> 00:24:20,603
About 350 a week before taxes.
432
00:24:20,686 --> 00:24:23,397
You can't live on that.
This is a dangerous job!
433
00:24:23,480 --> 00:24:26,524
I'll pay you $2,000 a week
to be the chief of my security.
434
00:24:26,607 --> 00:24:29,359
-No-no-no-no-no.
-Oh, yes. That's wrong. Okay.
435
00:24:29,442 --> 00:24:30,901
$4,000 a week.
436
00:24:30,984 --> 00:24:33,861
And you get 20 other guys,
and I'll pay 'em $3,000 a week.
437
00:24:33,902 --> 00:24:34,903
You missed the point.
438
00:24:34,986 --> 00:24:37,530
Now go in there and get
the $3 million and follow me!
439
00:24:37,571 --> 00:24:38,572
Yes, sir!
440
00:24:38,655 --> 00:24:39,989
Everybody, follow me!
441
00:24:40,364 --> 00:24:42,699
Monty, listen to me.
This is Spike, your old pal.
442
00:24:42,782 --> 00:24:44,867
You don't do things like that!
443
00:24:46,952 --> 00:24:49,204
Put it in a T-bill. Is that so wrong?
444
00:24:49,245 --> 00:24:50,663
Listen to me. What are you doin'?
445
00:24:50,704 --> 00:24:51,705
I'll tell you what's goin' on...
446
00:24:51,788 --> 00:24:53,915
-You don't even know those people!
-They're gonna think I'm crazy.
447
00:24:53,998 --> 00:24:56,166
But I'm not.
You got to stick with me, 'cause this is it!
448
00:24:56,207 --> 00:24:58,334
-This is the way we're gonna beat the system!
-What system?
449
00:24:58,375 --> 00:25:01,961
The baseball system! You got more heart
than any catcher I've ever worked with, man.
450
00:25:02,044 --> 00:25:04,588
And I can get anybody out
for three innings, anybody!
451
00:25:04,671 --> 00:25:06,130
And with this inheritance, man,
452
00:25:06,213 --> 00:25:07,923
this is our ticket to the big leagues!
453
00:25:08,006 --> 00:25:10,008
-You understand? You with me?
-No!
454
00:25:10,049 --> 00:25:12,217
-Well, yeah!
-Well, let's go!
455
00:25:15,011 --> 00:25:16,971
That's right. That's right Take some pictures.
456
00:25:17,054 --> 00:25:18,680
(BREWSTER AND SPIKE JABBERING)
457
00:25:22,058 --> 00:25:23,684
I want everything on film.
I need a record of it.
458
00:25:23,725 --> 00:25:24,726
For what?
459
00:25:25,601 --> 00:25:26,685
Strike!
460
00:25:26,726 --> 00:25:29,311
Watch the goddamn ball, Johnson!
461
00:25:29,394 --> 00:25:30,603
-(PHONE RINGING)
-You're not a farmer!
462
00:25:30,686 --> 00:25:33,063
You don't have to swing at shit in the dirt!
463
00:25:34,230 --> 00:25:36,982
What? Collect call from who?
464
00:25:38,400 --> 00:25:40,568
Switchboard says it's Brewster.
465
00:25:40,609 --> 00:25:41,610
He's callin' me from jail.
466
00:25:41,693 --> 00:25:44,278
-Just what I need.
-Tell him he owes me 200 bucks.
467
00:25:46,029 --> 00:25:48,072
Yeah, I'll accept the call.
468
00:25:49,406 --> 00:25:51,616
Charley, I'm not drunk. I'm in New York,
469
00:25:51,699 --> 00:25:53,617
and I just inherited 30 million bucks.
470
00:25:53,700 --> 00:25:56,411
I'm about to go
into negotiations to buy the team.
471
00:25:56,494 --> 00:25:58,245
Actually, I'm gonna rent the team.
472
00:25:58,286 --> 00:26:02,498
-Ball!
-What kind of a crap play is that?
473
00:26:02,789 --> 00:26:05,082
-Wilson, you idiot!
-You're out!
474
00:26:06,458 --> 00:26:09,711
You don't steal second
when you're down two runs!
475
00:26:10,920 --> 00:26:14,506
Brewster, do me a favor.
Go crazy on your own time and charges.
476
00:26:14,589 --> 00:26:17,008
This whole team's going to shit,
and we're gonna miss the play-offs.
477
00:26:17,091 --> 00:26:18,425
I ain't in the mood for no jokes!
478
00:26:18,716 --> 00:26:19,758
That's why I love you, Charley.
479
00:26:19,799 --> 00:26:22,510
And that's why I'm gonna raise your salary.
Because I love your dedication.
480
00:26:22,593 --> 00:26:24,595
Charley, I'm gonna get
the team new uniforms,
481
00:26:24,928 --> 00:26:27,931
a team bus with air conditioning and a TV!
482
00:26:28,097 --> 00:26:31,016
And we're arrange it
so that we can play the New York Yankees!
483
00:26:31,558 --> 00:26:34,936
Right. Right.
Okay, just tell me one thing, Mr. Millionaire.
484
00:26:35,019 --> 00:26:37,104
You're so rich, why are you calling collect?
485
00:26:37,145 --> 00:26:39,188
They gave me $100 bills, Charley.
486
00:26:39,271 --> 00:26:41,273
I had to rent this quarter from my accountant.
487
00:26:41,648 --> 00:26:45,943
Yeah, I know. It's a big problem.
Nighty-night, sweet prince.
488
00:26:46,401 --> 00:26:49,779
Nighty-night? Charley! He doesn't believe me.
489
00:26:55,201 --> 00:26:57,286
Thanks for the loaning of the quarter.
490
00:26:57,369 --> 00:27:00,288
-Wow! Now, that's really nice.
-Oh, it's beautiful.
491
00:27:00,746 --> 00:27:02,622
But there is no way I can see spending over
492
00:27:02,705 --> 00:27:05,582
a couple hundred thousand dollars
for something you wear around your neck.
493
00:27:05,623 --> 00:27:08,125
You know how many
hungry people that could feed?
494
00:27:08,166 --> 00:27:09,834
Let's go to lunch.
495
00:27:11,460 --> 00:27:12,878
Yo! Taxi!
496
00:27:15,714 --> 00:27:18,508
-Who the hell is that?
-Monty Brewster, the richest guy in the world.
497
00:27:18,591 --> 00:27:19,592
And I work for him.
498
00:27:19,633 --> 00:27:20,634
WOMAN: Monty who?
499
00:27:20,717 --> 00:27:25,638
How would you like to be my personal driver
for the next 30 days at $5,000 a week?
500
00:27:25,721 --> 00:27:29,307
You want to hire
a piece of shit car for $5,000 a week?
501
00:27:29,348 --> 00:27:31,641
-Cash!
-What a country!
502
00:27:31,724 --> 00:27:32,975
America, I love it!
503
00:27:33,058 --> 00:27:36,603
Mr. Brewster, you could hire
a fleet of limousines for that money!
504
00:27:36,644 --> 00:27:39,104
She's right.
You know where to hire limousines?
505
00:27:39,145 --> 00:27:40,187
Yeah.
506
00:27:40,270 --> 00:27:44,148
All right. I want you to hire me three of the
most expensive limousines with drivers,
507
00:27:44,231 --> 00:27:46,775
and bring the receipts
and give 'em to Miss Drake.
508
00:27:46,816 --> 00:27:48,484
-Yes, sir!
-We go to lunch now.
509
00:27:48,876 --> 00:27:51,378
Hey! Everybody!
Anybody want to go to lunch?
510
00:27:51,628 --> 00:27:52,629
I'm buying.
511
00:27:52,712 --> 00:27:54,422
ALL: (SHOUTING) Yeah!
512
00:27:56,757 --> 00:27:59,384
-I want pictures of this!
-Buzz off. I'm his personal photographer.
513
00:27:59,425 --> 00:28:02,511
Hey, what's this? Screw you!
This is a free country!
514
00:28:02,594 --> 00:28:04,721
What are you... Here. Focus on that!
515
00:28:06,556 --> 00:28:08,182
Come on, Spike!
516
00:28:08,599 --> 00:28:10,434
Wait for me, pal! Wait for me!
517
00:28:13,812 --> 00:28:14,854
Hey...
518
00:28:18,691 --> 00:28:20,442
(PEOPLE CLAMORING)
519
00:28:20,942 --> 00:28:22,318
-Taxi!
-Taxi!
520
00:28:23,986 --> 00:28:25,737
-MONTY: What's your name?
-Melvin.
521
00:28:25,778 --> 00:28:28,280
-Melvin, give him $500.
-Yes, sir.
522
00:28:29,114 --> 00:28:32,283
(GASPS) Look at all that money!
523
00:28:32,324 --> 00:28:34,284
You have the most beautiful eyes.
524
00:28:34,617 --> 00:28:37,286
Mr. Brewster, I have been
hired to keep your accounts
525
00:28:37,327 --> 00:28:39,954
for the next 30 days,
and that's the extent of my services.
526
00:28:40,037 --> 00:28:42,289
Uh, to where is our destination?
527
00:28:42,372 --> 00:28:43,498
(TIRES SCREECHING)
528
00:28:43,581 --> 00:28:44,957
Monty! How are you doin', pal?
529
00:28:44,998 --> 00:28:46,624
-Give me that.
-Watch it! Watch the lens!
530
00:28:46,707 --> 00:28:48,750
Chump, I'm Spike! We're right behind ya!
531
00:28:48,791 --> 00:28:51,001
That's Spike. We're buddies.
We're all together.
532
00:28:51,126 --> 00:28:53,294
I'll buy you a cab later, huh?
533
00:28:53,377 --> 00:28:55,212
(HORN TOOTING)
534
00:28:55,545 --> 00:28:57,547
(CLASSICAL MUSIC PLAYING)
535
00:29:09,267 --> 00:29:11,727
Two hundred people at a $100 a head.
536
00:29:11,810 --> 00:29:14,354
No. We're hungry. $200 a head!
537
00:29:14,437 --> 00:29:16,522
And, uh, what's your most
expensive wine you have?
538
00:29:16,605 --> 00:29:20,233
Oh, that's the Chateau Lafite 1961.
It's $400 a bottle.
539
00:29:20,650 --> 00:29:21,984
You guys like Lafite?
540
00:29:22,067 --> 00:29:23,318
ALL: (SHOUTING) Yeah!
541
00:29:23,693 --> 00:29:25,653
(DINERS CLAMORING)
542
00:29:37,665 --> 00:29:41,126
Excuse my expression,
but you think I'm a real asshole, don't ya?
543
00:29:41,501 --> 00:29:45,046
A country bumpkin that flashes his money
around like some big shot?
544
00:29:45,129 --> 00:29:48,132
-I'm your accountant. I'm not your judge.
-What college you go to?
545
00:29:48,382 --> 00:29:50,675
I don't see that that has
anything to do with anything.
546
00:29:50,716 --> 00:29:52,008
Come on, give me a break.
547
00:29:52,049 --> 00:29:53,675
All I want to know
is what college you went to.
548
00:29:53,716 --> 00:29:56,844
-All right. I went to Loyola. That's in...
-Loyola.
549
00:29:56,885 --> 00:30:00,346
Chicago
I know the city, and I know the college.
550
00:30:03,849 --> 00:30:06,268
You wanna put that back?
551
00:30:08,937 --> 00:30:10,605
And the ashtray.
552
00:30:13,691 --> 00:30:15,734
Why don't you go sit somewhere else?
553
00:30:15,817 --> 00:30:17,151
Why don't you get off my back?
554
00:30:17,234 --> 00:30:19,402
And why don't you
use your fork, not your fingers.
555
00:30:19,485 --> 00:30:22,112
-That's how it's usually done. Yeah.
-Oh, is that right?
556
00:30:22,821 --> 00:30:26,199
Boss found a job for you yet, by the way?
Like designated eater? (LAUGHS)
557
00:30:27,116 --> 00:30:29,326
Look, I don't want a job. I'm his friend.
558
00:30:29,534 --> 00:30:30,910
What's that pay?
559
00:30:30,993 --> 00:30:32,327
(ADDING MACHINE WHIRS)
560
00:30:34,871 --> 00:30:37,206
Why don't you
let me hire someone to do that for you,
561
00:30:37,289 --> 00:30:38,790
and we could have a lot of fun tonight.
562
00:30:39,415 --> 00:30:42,209
Oh, that's very flattering,
but I'm meeting my fiance.
563
00:30:42,292 --> 00:30:43,543
Who's the lucky guy?
564
00:30:43,626 --> 00:30:46,670
Warren Cox.
He's a junior partner at Granville and Baxter.
565
00:30:46,711 --> 00:30:49,088
-Is he a lawyer too?
-He's not just a lawyer.
566
00:30:49,171 --> 00:30:52,841
He's involved with the Sierra Club,
anti-nuclear movement, UNICEF.
567
00:30:52,882 --> 00:30:56,010
-And he's a sincere feminist.
-I bet.
568
00:30:56,593 --> 00:30:58,928
But a guy like that with so many activities,
569
00:30:59,011 --> 00:31:00,095
where's he find the time for you?
570
00:31:00,178 --> 00:31:01,929
It's hard sometimes.
571
00:31:02,012 --> 00:31:05,557
-But we're trying to do more things together.
-I'd like to meet him sometime.
572
00:31:05,640 --> 00:31:08,809
-He's a very busy man.
-I'd pay him for his time.
573
00:31:09,684 --> 00:31:11,394
I don't think so.
574
00:31:11,435 --> 00:31:12,978
I know you think you can buy up
575
00:31:13,061 --> 00:31:14,979
everything and everybody in the world,
576
00:31:15,062 --> 00:31:18,565
but I doubt that you could ever buy Warren.
577
00:31:18,648 --> 00:31:21,901
This is Chuck Fleming,
Action News, in midtown Manhattan.
578
00:31:21,942 --> 00:31:24,861
Now arriving at
the Plaza Hotel is Montgomery Brewster,
579
00:31:24,902 --> 00:31:27,237
minor league baseball pitcher
who earlier today
580
00:31:27,320 --> 00:31:30,072
inherited $30 million tax-free
581
00:31:30,155 --> 00:31:32,157
and is still celebrating.
582
00:31:33,825 --> 00:31:36,202
Mr. Brewster, what are you going to
do with all that money?
583
00:31:36,243 --> 00:31:38,411
Uh, spend it! No, just kidding.
584
00:31:38,452 --> 00:31:40,245
I'm forming a corporation tonight,
585
00:31:40,286 --> 00:31:42,246
and tomorrow morning we go into business.
586
00:31:42,287 --> 00:31:43,997
What kind of business is that, Mr. Brewster?
587
00:31:44,080 --> 00:31:47,416
What kind of business?
As you know, my business is baseball.
588
00:31:47,499 --> 00:31:50,752
But since I've inherited $30 million,
I have to expand and branch out.
589
00:31:50,793 --> 00:31:53,754
I've always had a soft spot
in my heart for artists and, uh,
590
00:31:53,837 --> 00:31:57,882
painters, writers, inventors...
And I'm gonna form this business.
591
00:31:57,923 --> 00:31:59,591
And I want everybody to get a shot.
592
00:31:59,632 --> 00:32:02,593
I don't care if you've been turned
down a thousand times, I'm hiring!
593
00:32:02,926 --> 00:32:05,428
How many people have you
hired already, Mr. Brewster?
594
00:32:05,469 --> 00:32:07,429
Uh, well, I think you should ask
595
00:32:07,470 --> 00:32:10,681
my senior vice president, uh, Spike Nolan!
596
00:32:10,764 --> 00:32:12,599
-Yeah. Spike. I'm paying him...
-Ha!
597
00:32:12,682 --> 00:32:14,308
...$100,000 a month to figure that out.
598
00:32:14,391 --> 00:32:15,600
(WHOOPING)
599
00:32:15,683 --> 00:32:18,477
100,000! Did you hear? 100,000 a month!
600
00:32:18,560 --> 00:32:20,937
(LAUGHS) Chuck Fleming! Ahhh!
601
00:32:21,020 --> 00:32:22,104
(FEEDBACK SQUEALS)
602
00:32:22,187 --> 00:32:25,106
-Hey, are we on the air now? Is this workin'?
-Yes. Right there.
603
00:32:25,189 --> 00:32:27,566
Can I say something to all the people who
thought I was a loser, Chuck?
604
00:32:27,607 --> 00:32:29,525
-Sure.
-(BLOWS RASPBERRY)
605
00:32:29,608 --> 00:32:32,193
Thanks, Chuck! Hey, Monty! Monty!
606
00:32:32,276 --> 00:32:35,279
That was Spike Nolan,
he's the catcher for the Hackensack Bulls.
607
00:32:35,529 --> 00:32:38,865
Mr. Brewster, I would love to
accommodate you and your friends,
608
00:32:38,948 --> 00:32:42,034
but the top two floors
have already been reserved.
609
00:32:42,325 --> 00:32:44,702
They'll be occupied
within the next two weeks.
610
00:32:44,785 --> 00:32:48,163
-How much are they paying?
-$100,000 a week.
611
00:32:48,246 --> 00:32:50,623
-Oh.
-Wow. Mister, uh...
612
00:32:51,206 --> 00:32:52,874
-Carter.
-Mr. Carter.
613
00:32:53,583 --> 00:32:56,085
I like your hotel. My friends like your hotel.
614
00:32:56,335 --> 00:32:58,837
-You like this hotel?
-I like this hotel. I love it.
615
00:32:58,920 --> 00:33:00,296
-He loves it too.
-(CHUCKLES)
616
00:33:00,480 --> 00:33:03,399
Listen. I'll tell you what. For the next month,
617
00:33:03,440 --> 00:33:04,983
I'll pay you...
618
00:33:05,692 --> 00:33:08,236
-$1 million in cash.
-(PEOPLE GASPING)
619
00:33:12,698 --> 00:33:13,782
Sign here, please.
620
00:33:13,865 --> 00:33:14,866
(PEOPLE CHEERING AND APPLAUDING)
621
00:33:44,687 --> 00:33:47,856
Hey, Melvin.
How are they hanging, my friend?
622
00:33:48,147 --> 00:33:51,441
Hey, you look good. Real big league.
(CHUCKLES)
623
00:34:02,493 --> 00:34:04,870
-Nice, huh?
-They're in the bedroom.
624
00:34:04,953 --> 00:34:06,955
Thanks for your help. (CHUCKLES)
625
00:34:07,038 --> 00:34:08,581
(WHISTLING)
626
00:34:12,167 --> 00:34:15,795
Monty! Hey, old Monty, old pal!
627
00:34:17,046 --> 00:34:19,548
-Hey, pal, get a load of this, huh?
-Get a load of...
628
00:34:19,631 --> 00:34:21,674
What do you think? I found it all in one shop,
629
00:34:21,757 --> 00:34:23,091
from the shoes all the way up to this.
630
00:34:23,132 --> 00:34:24,466
This was made for Johnny Bench.
631
00:34:24,549 --> 00:34:25,925
He didn't pick it up, so they gave it to me.
632
00:34:25,966 --> 00:34:27,467
A catcher's mask! (CHUCKLES)
633
00:34:27,550 --> 00:34:30,469
-Oh, Monty, I can't thank you enough.
-It's, uh...
634
00:34:30,510 --> 00:34:32,803
-What do you think, huh?
-Hey!
635
00:34:33,470 --> 00:34:35,305
-They just made that for you?
-Yeah.
636
00:34:35,388 --> 00:34:38,808
Wow. Honest? Too conservative for me.
637
00:34:38,891 --> 00:34:40,267
-Too... What are you talking...
-For me!
638
00:34:40,308 --> 00:34:43,894
-This is the new Spike Nolan here.
-I know, but this is great.
639
00:34:43,977 --> 00:34:46,145
Well, great on you,
but great is your accountant.
640
00:34:46,228 --> 00:34:47,479
Very nice. (CHUCKLES)
641
00:34:47,520 --> 00:34:49,605
Yeah, she's nice, but she thinks I'm a lowlife.
642
00:34:49,646 --> 00:34:52,440
-I can understand that.
-Get out of here! What are you talkin' about?
643
00:34:52,481 --> 00:34:54,191
Gentlemen, do you think I'm a lowlife?
644
00:34:54,274 --> 00:34:56,150
BOTH: Oh, no, Mr. Brewster.
645
00:34:56,233 --> 00:34:58,985
-Not with these clothes.
-See what I mean?
646
00:34:59,026 --> 00:35:00,152
Ooh, and you listen to these people?
647
00:35:00,235 --> 00:35:01,945
Hey, look at all the suits I got.
648
00:35:03,655 --> 00:35:06,658
Now, look.
I know that this is none of my business,
649
00:35:06,741 --> 00:35:08,743
but at the rate you're going, you'll have spent
650
00:35:08,826 --> 00:35:10,494
your entire inheritance in less than a month,
651
00:35:10,535 --> 00:35:12,036
and you'll have nothing to show for it.
652
00:35:12,453 --> 00:35:16,540
Excuse me, sir. There's a Mr. Warren Cox
here to see Miss Drake.
653
00:35:17,415 --> 00:35:20,668
-Mr. Cox?
-Warren! How you doing?
654
00:35:21,168 --> 00:35:23,420
-Monty Brewster. Pleased to meet you.
-Hello.
655
00:35:23,503 --> 00:35:25,004
I've heard so much about you.
656
00:35:25,045 --> 00:35:29,215
My God. I hear you're a swell fellow.
We're drinking some champagne.
657
00:35:29,673 --> 00:35:30,674
-Hello, dear.
-Hi.
658
00:35:31,508 --> 00:35:34,344
That's sweet. I'll get this. Is it raining out?
659
00:35:34,427 --> 00:35:36,720
Not at the moment, but you never know.
660
00:35:36,803 --> 00:35:39,347
Better safe than sorry.
That's my philosophy too.
661
00:35:39,388 --> 00:35:42,391
-Uh, have a drink.
-Oh, thank you. No, I don't drink alcohol.
662
00:35:42,474 --> 00:35:44,267
Uh-oh. We're going to be late for that benefit.
663
00:35:44,350 --> 00:35:45,642
-Benefit?
-Yes.
664
00:35:45,683 --> 00:35:47,393
It's the Committee to Ban Contact Sports.
665
00:35:47,476 --> 00:35:51,313
Studies have shown sanctioned violence has
a detrimental effect on our young people,
666
00:35:51,354 --> 00:35:54,523
so I do a little legal work for the committee.
667
00:35:54,564 --> 00:35:56,816
You guys ain't messin' around
with baseball, are you?
668
00:35:56,899 --> 00:35:59,192
Baseball? No, no.
Boxing, football, ice hockey...
669
00:35:59,275 --> 00:36:01,652
-You know, the truly barbaric sports.
-Oh.
670
00:36:01,693 --> 00:36:03,945
I'd like to make a small contribution, if I may.
671
00:36:04,236 --> 00:36:06,529
You know, I think we're gonna be very late.
672
00:36:06,612 --> 00:36:09,698
Darling, this is what the benefit
is for, to raise money.
673
00:36:09,739 --> 00:36:11,699
In a sense, we're at the benefit, right now.
674
00:36:11,782 --> 00:36:14,201
And so am I. $100,000 okay?
675
00:36:14,576 --> 00:36:19,038
$100,000? Thank you, very, very much.
676
00:36:19,538 --> 00:36:20,789
Here, have a drink.
677
00:36:21,164 --> 00:36:22,415
Thank you. I will.
678
00:36:23,207 --> 00:36:24,374
Warren, you don't even drink.
679
00:36:24,832 --> 00:36:27,167
-Well, one little sip won't hurt, dear.
-That's right.
680
00:36:27,208 --> 00:36:28,667
(GLASSES CHIME)
681
00:36:28,708 --> 00:36:29,917
Mmm.
682
00:36:30,542 --> 00:36:33,711
This is a really
wonderful suite you have, Mr. Brewster.
683
00:36:33,752 --> 00:36:36,171
-I'm glad you like it.
-Yes. Oh, look at that.
684
00:36:36,421 --> 00:36:40,716
Two Louis XVI chairs
with a good tapestry fabric.
685
00:36:41,717 --> 00:36:44,428
That's a nice attempt
at a classic French piano.
686
00:36:45,220 --> 00:36:46,888
Marie Therese chandelier...
687
00:36:46,929 --> 00:36:48,805
Yeah, I see what your
decorator was trying to do here.
688
00:36:48,888 --> 00:36:52,391
There's a definite continuity
to all the elements in the room.
689
00:36:52,474 --> 00:36:54,809
Personally, I'd of done
a few things differently, but...
690
00:36:54,892 --> 00:36:57,519
-Mr. Cox, you know so much about this stuff.
-Well...
691
00:36:58,144 --> 00:37:01,897
My ex-wife Marilyn's a decorator,
and a lot of it rubbed off on me.
692
00:37:01,980 --> 00:37:04,190
-You know, you could really help me out.
-How's that?
693
00:37:05,024 --> 00:37:09,111
Well I'd like for you to redecorate my offices.
694
00:37:09,194 --> 00:37:12,864
I'd pay you, of course. Uh, $250,000?
695
00:37:13,155 --> 00:37:15,407
-I don't know what to say.
-Say yes.
696
00:37:16,658 --> 00:37:19,118
Mr. Brewster, I'm a lawyer.
697
00:37:19,576 --> 00:37:23,329
I'm sure New York is full of decorators who
would die for that kind of opportunity.
698
00:37:24,079 --> 00:37:25,747
Really, this is so out of left field,
699
00:37:25,830 --> 00:37:27,414
to use a metaphor from your profession.
700
00:37:27,497 --> 00:37:29,499
If you think the job's
too big for you to handle, just say no.
701
00:37:29,582 --> 00:37:30,583
No.
702
00:37:30,624 --> 00:37:33,585
I mean, I'm not saying no. Not at all.
I'm not saying that.
703
00:37:33,835 --> 00:37:37,171
Warren, you're a lawyer.
You are not a decorator!
704
00:37:37,254 --> 00:37:39,422
There's nothing wrong
with being a decorator.
705
00:37:39,463 --> 00:37:41,047
Marilyn makes a rather good living at it.
706
00:37:41,088 --> 00:37:44,091
-That's it! Marilyn, she could help you.
-What?
707
00:37:44,424 --> 00:37:46,717
I'd pay her $100,000, if that's not an insult.
708
00:37:46,758 --> 00:37:48,801
Well, I'd have to ask her,
709
00:37:48,884 --> 00:37:51,261
but, uh, I think she'd be delighted.
710
00:37:51,344 --> 00:37:53,596
I mean, you were telling me
how you never get to see your fiance.
711
00:37:53,679 --> 00:37:55,764
This way, you get to see him every day.
712
00:37:55,805 --> 00:37:57,973
-Just trying to be helpful.
-Mmm-hmm.
713
00:37:58,056 --> 00:38:00,183
And what about your job
at the firm and our honeymoon?
714
00:38:00,266 --> 00:38:03,644
-Well, it would only be for a couple of weeks.
-Couple of weeks.
715
00:38:03,727 --> 00:38:04,811
We've got a whole lifetime
for our honeymoon.
716
00:38:05,102 --> 00:38:06,103
A whole lifetime.
717
00:38:06,394 --> 00:38:09,605
-It's been a pleasure meeting you. Monty?
-Warren.
718
00:38:10,248 --> 00:38:12,250
Angela wanted me to phone up
from the lobby, but, no,
719
00:38:12,333 --> 00:38:16,170
I thought would come up here
and meet you, mano-a-mano.
720
00:38:16,211 --> 00:38:19,047
-I'm glad I did.
-Warren, me too.
721
00:38:19,422 --> 00:38:23,551
-Let's go, Warren.
-You're leaving? Oh, goodness, no.
722
00:38:24,051 --> 00:38:25,844
Hey, wait a minute!
723
00:38:26,719 --> 00:38:29,847
-Better safe than sorry.
-Good night, Mr. Brewster.
724
00:38:29,888 --> 00:38:31,931
Hey, call me Monty. Warren does.
725
00:38:33,140 --> 00:38:35,225
Hey, let me get the door.
726
00:38:35,308 --> 00:38:39,020
-Thank you. Yes. I will.
-And you drive careful.
727
00:38:39,061 --> 00:38:40,520
-Good night. Nice meeting you.
-Good night.
728
00:38:40,561 --> 00:38:42,229
Nice meeting you.
729
00:38:43,980 --> 00:38:46,190
Now that was a real asshole!
730
00:38:48,859 --> 00:38:53,280
You want a month off
to be Mr. Brewster's interior decorator?
731
00:38:53,947 --> 00:38:58,159
I, uh, realize that it's
a rather unorthodox request,
732
00:38:58,242 --> 00:39:00,285
but it's an incredible opportunity.
733
00:39:00,410 --> 00:39:02,703
He actually wants me
to start working for him this morning
734
00:39:02,744 --> 00:39:04,412
in, uh, about 20 minutes.
735
00:39:05,538 --> 00:39:06,622
How much is he paying you?
736
00:39:07,080 --> 00:39:08,456
A quarter of million dollars, sir.
737
00:39:11,292 --> 00:39:12,334
(WHISPERING, INDISTINCT)
738
00:39:17,213 --> 00:39:20,382
Yes, we understand that kind of opportunity.
739
00:39:20,423 --> 00:39:22,883
I think a leave of absence can be arranged.
740
00:39:23,383 --> 00:39:25,551
As I'm sure you know,
741
00:39:25,592 --> 00:39:29,262
Mr. Horn was our most important client.
742
00:39:29,345 --> 00:39:31,722
And the firm is naturally concerned with
743
00:39:31,763 --> 00:39:34,974
how Mr. Brewster
conducts himself with his inheritance.
744
00:39:35,933 --> 00:39:38,018
If you're in his employ,
745
00:39:38,101 --> 00:39:42,563
it could make it easier for us
if you could act as our eyes and ears.
746
00:39:42,604 --> 00:39:44,814
Absolutely. No problem.
747
00:39:45,689 --> 00:39:47,941
My first loyalty would always be to the firm.
748
00:39:48,232 --> 00:39:50,901
-Hmm.
-Hmm. Keep us posted.
749
00:39:53,320 --> 00:39:57,449
Oh, and don't mention this conversation
to Miss Drake or anyone else.
750
00:39:57,699 --> 00:39:59,492
Oh, of course not. No.
751
00:40:00,618 --> 00:40:02,119
And thank you.
752
00:40:02,577 --> 00:40:04,078
Thank you both very much.
753
00:40:06,330 --> 00:40:07,831
-Good morning, Melvin.
-Good morning, Mr. Brewster.
754
00:40:07,914 --> 00:40:10,791
-Here's the money. You think I'm crazy?
-Crazy?
755
00:40:11,041 --> 00:40:13,501
-Of course not.
-Let's go do business.
756
00:40:15,628 --> 00:40:17,296
(PEOPLE SHOUTING)
757
00:40:24,636 --> 00:40:26,888
-Hi, Monty. Big day ahead, pal.
-Okay. Great.
758
00:40:26,971 --> 00:40:29,139
Let's do some business,
and kick some butt around here!
759
00:40:29,222 --> 00:40:31,557
-All right. Let's kick some butt around here!
-What?
760
00:40:31,640 --> 00:40:34,100
-What? Who the hell are you?
-Who the hell are you?
761
00:40:34,141 --> 00:40:36,977
Who the hell am I? I'm Morty King,
king of the mimics, that's who!
762
00:40:37,060 --> 00:40:39,312
Anything you say
I guarantee it'll be repeated.
763
00:40:39,395 --> 00:40:41,021
I'm like an X-Erox machine.
764
00:40:41,479 --> 00:40:44,523
-No, Warren. Hold it more to the left.
-Your left or my left?
765
00:40:44,731 --> 00:40:47,734
Oh, look, there's Warren.
That must be Marilyn. Hey!
766
00:40:47,942 --> 00:40:49,693
-You just watch your mouth.
-You just watch your mouth.
767
00:40:49,776 --> 00:40:52,487
Don't you remember
anything I ever taught you?
768
00:40:52,570 --> 00:40:54,572
It's my left. It's always my left.
769
00:40:54,655 --> 00:40:55,989
It's the decorator's left.
770
00:40:56,614 --> 00:40:57,990
-Hey.
-Watch out!
771
00:41:00,242 --> 00:41:02,661
Oh, Warren! Oh, are you okay?
772
00:41:02,744 --> 00:41:05,204
-Oh. Ah.
-Oh, God. Be careful.
773
00:41:05,287 --> 00:41:07,789
-Hi. I'm Monty Brewster.
-Monty Brewster?
774
00:41:08,206 --> 00:41:10,583
How do you do?
I've heard so much about you.
775
00:41:10,666 --> 00:41:12,334
Please, may I call you Monty?
776
00:41:12,417 --> 00:41:14,043
-Of course.
-Of course.
777
00:41:14,126 --> 00:41:16,002
Oh, Monty, I have the
most wonderful idea for you.
778
00:41:16,085 --> 00:41:19,379
I am going to do for you
a postmodern fantasy in here.
779
00:41:19,462 --> 00:41:21,964
-Oh, I knew this was a terrible idea.
-What are you saying?
780
00:41:22,005 --> 00:41:23,673
You don't like the postmodern fantasy look?
781
00:41:24,090 --> 00:41:27,259
-Shut your eyes, and see Mesopotamia...
-Mesopotamia.
782
00:41:27,342 --> 00:41:29,969
-Meeting Busby Berkeley.
-Yes, that sounds...
783
00:41:30,010 --> 00:41:31,678
-Yes. It's a knockout.
-It's a knockout.
784
00:41:31,886 --> 00:41:32,970
We're gonna knock out the walls too.
785
00:41:33,345 --> 00:41:35,221
-Every one. Everywhere.
-Every one. Everywhere.
786
00:41:35,304 --> 00:41:36,596
-Spare no expense.
-Spare no expense.
787
00:41:36,679 --> 00:41:38,555
-Will you shut up?
-(MIMICKING CONTINUES)
788
00:41:38,638 --> 00:41:40,681
It's only for a month, darling.
789
00:41:40,764 --> 00:41:43,349
And it's going to be a very long month.
790
00:41:43,640 --> 00:41:46,225
-Get... Get four sets.
-Get... Get four sets.
791
00:41:46,308 --> 00:41:48,018
Wonderful. Fine. Fine.
792
00:41:48,059 --> 00:41:52,021
Oh, Angela. Angela.
Please, I need to speak to you. Please.
793
00:41:52,104 --> 00:41:54,439
Angela, did Warren tell you
that I have decided,
794
00:41:54,522 --> 00:41:56,190
as my wedding gift to you two,
795
00:41:56,231 --> 00:41:58,233
I am going to decorate
your apartment for free.
796
00:41:58,316 --> 00:41:59,317
That's great, Marilyn.
797
00:41:59,692 --> 00:42:01,568
-Thank you.
-Pas de quoi.
798
00:42:03,236 --> 00:42:05,529
(MIMICKING) Mr. Brewster,
I'm a real good manicurist.
799
00:42:07,822 --> 00:42:09,448
Spike, You know what I'd like you to do?
800
00:42:09,531 --> 00:42:10,657
-What's that?
-Choke this guy.
801
00:42:10,698 --> 00:42:11,740
My pleasure.
802
00:42:11,823 --> 00:42:14,075
-Come on, asshole!
-(GROANING)
803
00:42:14,158 --> 00:42:15,409
I'll give you a line on anything.
804
00:42:15,492 --> 00:42:17,076
Baseball, basketball, football, the ponies.
805
00:42:17,159 --> 00:42:18,535
Whatever you want!
806
00:42:18,576 --> 00:42:19,743
-(PHONE RINGING)
-Come on with me.
807
00:42:19,826 --> 00:42:21,202
I gotta stop here at my desk
and get my messages.
808
00:42:21,243 --> 00:42:22,535
(CHATTERING)
809
00:42:22,618 --> 00:42:24,244
Excuse me. Pardon me. Please, sir.
810
00:42:24,327 --> 00:42:26,329
I'd like to call
your attention to this area right here.
811
00:42:26,370 --> 00:42:28,455
This is the Arabian desert.
It is a dry as a bone.
812
00:42:28,538 --> 00:42:31,832
It's a place where
a glass of ice water can cost $5.00 a glass, sir.
813
00:42:31,873 --> 00:42:33,916
Now, up here. This is the North Pole.
It's an ice floe,
814
00:42:33,999 --> 00:42:37,502
and throughout this region
of the North Atlantic are many icebergs, sir.
815
00:42:37,543 --> 00:42:41,171
And nobody owns them. They're PDIs.
Public Domain Icebergs.
816
00:42:41,212 --> 00:42:44,256
I think you're beginning to recognize
how simple and pure this idea is.
817
00:42:44,339 --> 00:42:48,217
Now, what I would like to do is go the North
Pole, select a good-sized iceberg,
818
00:42:48,359 --> 00:42:50,569
and simply dig out a chamber
from the rear end of it,
819
00:42:50,652 --> 00:42:53,613
drop in two 20,000-horsepower
marine diesel engines,
820
00:42:53,654 --> 00:42:56,365
and sail Brewstersberg number one to Mecca.
821
00:42:56,448 --> 00:42:57,782
(TUNE PLAYING)
822
00:42:57,823 --> 00:42:58,824
What do you think, sir?
823
00:42:58,907 --> 00:42:59,908
(INTERCOM BUZZES)
824
00:42:59,991 --> 00:43:02,201
-I don't know what to think.
-Mr. Brewster, line three.
825
00:43:03,452 --> 00:43:05,412
-Hello. Yes. What?
-WOMAN: Mr. Brewster, it went up!
826
00:43:05,495 --> 00:43:06,996
It went up? Well, sell it.
827
00:43:07,329 --> 00:43:09,456
Don't sell it! You buy it when it's like that.
828
00:43:10,248 --> 00:43:11,332
It's a great idea. What's your name?
829
00:43:11,373 --> 00:43:12,374
-Luther.
-Luther, listen.
830
00:43:12,457 --> 00:43:14,917
I'd like to bet on
every long shot in every race,
831
00:43:15,000 --> 00:43:16,751
50-to-1 and over this week at Aqueduct.
832
00:43:16,834 --> 00:43:18,710
For the week? Yeah, I can cover it.
833
00:43:18,793 --> 00:43:20,669
-Great. How much to get this off the ground?
-Oh, maybe...
834
00:43:20,752 --> 00:43:23,838
Oh, no, no, no, no.
This thing melts, and he knows it!
835
00:43:23,921 --> 00:43:27,674
We would experience a loss of only 18%
through evaporation and melting.
836
00:43:27,757 --> 00:43:31,218
Hey. Think of what that means to all
those thirsty Arab farmers! It's great!
837
00:43:31,301 --> 00:43:32,468
ANGELA: What thirsty Arab farmers?
838
00:43:32,509 --> 00:43:34,344
There aren't any! There just aren't any!
839
00:43:34,427 --> 00:43:36,387
'Cause there's no farmers
in the desert, Monty!
840
00:43:36,887 --> 00:43:38,555
Well, I think that's unfair!
841
00:43:39,055 --> 00:43:42,683
Loyola vs. Notre Dame
in a field hockey game? This is fabulous.
842
00:43:42,766 --> 00:43:43,850
You went to Loyola, didn't you?
843
00:43:43,933 --> 00:43:45,017
You gotta be kidding!
844
00:43:45,058 --> 00:43:48,061
Listen, I want to bet $50,000 that Loyola wins!
845
00:43:48,269 --> 00:43:50,646
$50,000 on Loyola over Notre Dame
846
00:43:50,687 --> 00:43:52,855
and $5,000 on every
50-to-1 long shot for the week.
847
00:43:52,896 --> 00:43:54,772
-Sir, you are down!
-He's doin' it!
848
00:43:55,022 --> 00:43:57,190
-It's field hockey.
-(MUTTERING)
849
00:43:57,273 --> 00:43:59,525
If I gave you a million dollars
for this iceberg thing,
850
00:43:59,566 --> 00:44:00,858
would that be enough?
851
00:44:00,899 --> 00:44:02,692
A million dollars. Yes.
That would be great, sir.
852
00:44:02,733 --> 00:44:03,859
(ICEBERG TUNE PLAYING)
853
00:44:03,900 --> 00:44:04,901
-Hello.
-CHARLEY: Brewster.
854
00:44:04,984 --> 00:44:06,694
Charley! How you doin', my man?
855
00:44:06,777 --> 00:44:08,737
-All right.
-That's great. I just bought an iceberg.
856
00:44:08,820 --> 00:44:10,196
-What?
-Wait till you see the uniforms I rented.
857
00:44:10,279 --> 00:44:11,863
Not yet, he hasn't. Not yet.
858
00:44:11,946 --> 00:44:14,031
-And I rented our home stadium.
-What?
859
00:44:14,072 --> 00:44:16,407
Yes, and I'm gonna spare
no expense and fix it up
860
00:44:16,490 --> 00:44:18,658
and make it look like a big league stadium!
861
00:44:18,699 --> 00:44:21,535
It's gonna be great because
we're gonna play an exhibition game.
862
00:44:21,618 --> 00:44:22,744
With the Yankees, three innings!
863
00:44:22,827 --> 00:44:23,869
The Yankees?
864
00:44:23,910 --> 00:44:24,911
And I'm pitching!
865
00:44:24,994 --> 00:44:26,078
-New York Yankees!
-What the hell's goin' on?
866
00:44:26,161 --> 00:44:28,621
-I gotta get these guys on the bus!
-Charley, don't take the bus.
867
00:44:33,208 --> 00:44:36,044
(PLAYING TAKE ME OUT
TO THE BALL GAME)
868
00:44:40,715 --> 00:44:43,384
Chuck Fleming, Action News.
I'm here at Battery Park
869
00:44:43,425 --> 00:44:45,468
with Montgomery Brewster and entourage
870
00:44:45,551 --> 00:44:48,554
anxiously awaiting the arrival
of the Hackensack Bulls,
871
00:44:48,595 --> 00:44:50,597
in New York City for the first time to tune up
872
00:44:50,680 --> 00:44:52,765
for an unprecedented challenge game
873
00:44:52,848 --> 00:44:54,641
with the famed New York Yankees.
874
00:44:55,224 --> 00:44:57,392
Naturally, Monty Brewster intends to pitch.
875
00:44:58,559 --> 00:45:00,894
(NEWS REPORT CONTINUES)
876
00:45:03,855 --> 00:45:05,064
(HELICOPTER APPROACHING)
877
00:45:10,569 --> 00:45:12,028
(WHOOPING)
878
00:45:12,319 --> 00:45:14,195
(PEOPLE CHEERING)
879
00:45:26,123 --> 00:45:29,417
Christ sakes, Brewster.
You fly us all the way from Jersey,
880
00:45:29,500 --> 00:45:31,793
and then you get these
choppers to fly us back here!
881
00:45:31,876 --> 00:45:34,044
We took the bus,
we would've been here two hours ago!
882
00:45:34,085 --> 00:45:37,129
Tell my team,
from now on we travel first class!
883
00:45:38,880 --> 00:45:41,424
Hey, Charley, welcome to New York City!
884
00:45:42,633 --> 00:45:43,675
(PLAYERS CLAMORING)
885
00:45:43,758 --> 00:45:44,759
You guys look great!
886
00:45:44,800 --> 00:45:45,926
How do you like the new uniforms?
887
00:45:46,009 --> 00:45:47,051
(ENTHUSED SHOUTING)
888
00:45:47,760 --> 00:45:50,429
You gotta wait till you see the
apartments I rented for you guys.
889
00:45:50,929 --> 00:45:53,890
-He rented apartments for these guys?
-Apartments?
890
00:45:54,265 --> 00:45:56,433
Penthouses with swimming pools.
891
00:45:56,516 --> 00:45:58,976
Twenty-seven players,
everybody's got their own place.
892
00:45:59,059 --> 00:46:00,727
We're gonna have a lot of fun, men,
893
00:46:00,768 --> 00:46:03,395
because we're gonna get in shape, and
we're gonna beat the Yankees!
894
00:46:03,436 --> 00:46:05,104
PLAYERS: (SHOUTING) All right!
895
00:46:05,604 --> 00:46:08,064
If you ask me,
they oughta lock him up for his own good.
896
00:46:08,105 --> 00:46:09,523
And what the hell does he think he's doin'?
897
00:46:09,606 --> 00:46:11,983
The Yankees see this,
they're really gonna rub it in.
898
00:46:12,066 --> 00:46:13,859
Come on, Charley, relax!
899
00:46:13,942 --> 00:46:15,193
Enjoy yourself!
900
00:46:15,276 --> 00:46:16,443
(PLAYERS WHOOPING)
901
00:46:18,611 --> 00:46:20,529
Huh? Is that great?
902
00:46:24,783 --> 00:46:28,161
-I hope we haven't underestimated him.
-I beg your pardon?
903
00:46:28,244 --> 00:46:29,954
Oh, you're doing fine, Warren.
904
00:46:29,995 --> 00:46:33,123
This is precisely the kind of
flagrant misuse of money
905
00:46:33,164 --> 00:46:34,790
that we want you to keep us apprised of.
906
00:46:34,873 --> 00:46:36,833
-Oh, he's wasting millions of dollars.
-Mmm.
907
00:46:36,916 --> 00:46:40,127
You should see what he spent
on the decorations alone.
908
00:46:40,502 --> 00:46:42,921
Wait till you see the practice field.
909
00:46:42,962 --> 00:46:45,965
It's great. I'm gonna
have the bus take us over to the island.
910
00:46:46,256 --> 00:46:48,174
CHARLEY: The practice
field's on Long Island?
911
00:46:48,257 --> 00:46:51,510
-Yeah.
-Brewster, the airport's on Long Island.
912
00:46:51,593 --> 00:46:53,970
You flew us all the way in
from the airport to here
913
00:46:54,053 --> 00:46:56,221
so we could take the bus
back to Long Island?
914
00:46:56,304 --> 00:46:59,140
I couldn't get the band on the runway.
They wouldn't let me!
915
00:46:59,223 --> 00:47:01,475
No matter how much money I offered them.
916
00:47:01,558 --> 00:47:04,185
Oh, yeah.
You can't play baseball without a band.
917
00:47:04,268 --> 00:47:06,520
Right. Come on. Let's get on the bus.
918
00:47:06,645 --> 00:47:09,022
One-two, one-two, one-two.
919
00:47:09,188 --> 00:47:10,939
Come on! Come on! Move it! Move it!
920
00:47:10,980 --> 00:47:12,957
(PLAYERS CHATTERING)
921
00:47:15,542 --> 00:47:18,711
Beautiful, Benny! Tinkers to Evers to shit!
922
00:47:19,044 --> 00:47:20,920
Pick it up! The white ball. That's it!
923
00:47:21,003 --> 00:47:25,048
Hey! Come on! Jesus, I don't know
what's the matter with those guys.
924
00:47:25,089 --> 00:47:26,673
We play better than this. Honest we do.
925
00:47:27,215 --> 00:47:29,967
-Maybe they're tight right now.
-Maybe they're tired.
926
00:47:30,384 --> 00:47:33,512
Maybe it was that long flight
you chartered from Newark.
927
00:47:34,513 --> 00:47:36,973
I'm gonna go warm up, Miss Drake.
928
00:47:37,056 --> 00:47:39,349
Why don't you try the same?
929
00:47:39,432 --> 00:47:42,393
Hey, come on! Look good out there!
930
00:47:42,434 --> 00:47:44,894
Let's do a 6-4-3. Pepper it up!
931
00:47:48,355 --> 00:47:50,273
Hey, Collins, you got trouble with your glove,
932
00:47:50,356 --> 00:47:51,648
try catching it with your ass!
933
00:48:09,957 --> 00:48:12,459
Hi, operator? Mr. Brewster's suite, please.
934
00:48:12,709 --> 00:48:13,710
(ROMANTIC BALLAD PLAYING)
935
00:48:13,793 --> 00:48:14,794
(TELEPHONE RINGS)
936
00:48:16,837 --> 00:48:17,838
Aw, God...
937
00:48:17,963 --> 00:48:18,964
(RINGING CONTINUES)
938
00:48:19,756 --> 00:48:20,882
Time.
939
00:48:26,846 --> 00:48:29,056
-What?
-Hi, Brewster. This is Angela.
940
00:48:29,139 --> 00:48:31,141
-Angela who?
-Angela Drake.
941
00:48:32,100 --> 00:48:34,435
-Miss Drake.
-Um, I was wondering.
942
00:48:34,476 --> 00:48:36,644
Could I come up there
and talk to you for a minute?
943
00:48:36,685 --> 00:48:38,478
-Talk to me? Now?
-Mmm-hmm.
944
00:48:38,561 --> 00:48:40,771
-Uh, perhaps in the morning.
-Oh, no. Monty?
945
00:48:40,812 --> 00:48:42,730
This is very important,
and I need to see you now.
946
00:48:49,653 --> 00:48:52,572
-Can't you tell me over the phone?
-No, because, look.
947
00:48:52,655 --> 00:48:56,992
This is something that could do both of us
a world of good, if you know what I mean.
948
00:48:57,033 --> 00:48:59,660
-Have you been drinking?
-No, not at all.
949
00:49:01,286 --> 00:49:04,539
-And you want to come up to my room, now?
-Mmm-hmm.
950
00:49:10,503 --> 00:49:12,296
-Miss Drake?
-Uh-huh?
951
00:49:14,172 --> 00:49:15,840
-Angela.
-Yes.
952
00:49:15,923 --> 00:49:17,925
-Give me five minutes.
-Okay.
953
00:49:22,262 --> 00:49:25,765
That was Miss Drake. She says
there's a mad bomber in the building.
954
00:49:25,848 --> 00:49:27,307
They're getting
all the people out of the hotel.
955
00:49:28,141 --> 00:49:32,353
Listen, get your wrap. You go away,
and you could come back tomorrow.
956
00:49:32,436 --> 00:49:33,687
We can start all over.
957
00:49:33,853 --> 00:49:35,354
Well, did he fall for it?
958
00:49:35,395 --> 00:49:37,855
-Yes, he fell for it.
-What do you look so unhappy for?
959
00:49:37,896 --> 00:49:39,147
We're doing it for his own good.
960
00:49:39,188 --> 00:49:40,355
(GROANS)
961
00:49:40,438 --> 00:49:41,689
Come on!
962
00:49:42,189 --> 00:49:43,356
Adieu.
963
00:49:44,357 --> 00:49:46,734
Been expecting you. The door's open.
964
00:49:46,817 --> 00:49:49,110
(BRIGHTLY) Come in, the door's open.
965
00:49:49,193 --> 00:49:51,612
(CLEARS THROAT) Angela, hello.
966
00:49:52,404 --> 00:49:54,322
Hello, Angela. Just be cool.
967
00:49:57,616 --> 00:49:59,075
-Hi, Spike.
-Hi.
968
00:49:59,158 --> 00:50:01,910
She's really a very nice girl.
You should get to know...
969
00:50:02,368 --> 00:50:03,786
-Hi.
-Hi, Spike.
970
00:50:06,205 --> 00:50:08,373
The door's open. Come in.
971
00:50:12,543 --> 00:50:15,212
-(GASPS)
-Hi, Eugene Provost, financial advisor.
972
00:50:15,253 --> 00:50:17,088
-Pleasure to meet you.
-Who in hell is this?
973
00:50:17,171 --> 00:50:18,213
He's a big league money man.
974
00:50:18,254 --> 00:50:19,672
Money? (MUTTERS)
975
00:50:19,713 --> 00:50:23,717
Look, for the past five years,
this guy's predicted 88%.
976
00:50:23,800 --> 00:50:26,219
88% of what this guy says makes money!
977
00:50:26,260 --> 00:50:29,096
88.4% to be exact, but who's counting?
978
00:50:29,179 --> 00:50:31,556
I'm so confident of my ability
to make you money,
979
00:50:31,639 --> 00:50:35,225
I will only take 15%
of your profits after taxes.
980
00:50:35,308 --> 00:50:38,352
In other words,
I only get paid if you profit from my advice.
981
00:50:39,102 --> 00:50:43,523
Then you're hired.
$100,000 a week plus 15%.
982
00:50:43,564 --> 00:50:46,275
Monty, the man doesn't want the $100,000.
983
00:50:46,358 --> 00:50:48,401
Well, the man's gonna have to take $100,000,
984
00:50:48,442 --> 00:50:52,571
because that's what the job pays.
$100,000 a week, plus 15%.
985
00:50:52,654 --> 00:50:54,280
What do you say?
986
00:50:54,363 --> 00:50:56,323
I'll make an exception
in your case, Mr. Brewster.
987
00:50:56,406 --> 00:50:58,074
-Good!
-Sure. Join the club.
988
00:50:59,575 --> 00:51:03,453
Hey, 9:15.
It's way past your bedtime, Miss Drake.
989
00:51:04,036 --> 00:51:06,496
You'll never know, Mr. Brewster.
990
00:51:06,579 --> 00:51:08,747
Be sure to get home before the sun comes up.
You know what I mean?
991
00:51:08,830 --> 00:51:10,122
(IMITATES BAT WINGS FLAPPING)
992
00:51:12,040 --> 00:51:13,916
Good night, gentlemen.
993
00:51:17,044 --> 00:51:20,255
Come on. Settle down, will ya?
You'll throw your arm out.
994
00:51:20,922 --> 00:51:22,548
God damn it. She's gonna be real mad
995
00:51:22,589 --> 00:51:25,091
when she finds out what's goin' on.
996
00:51:29,845 --> 00:51:31,763
Will you forget about Angela?
997
00:51:31,846 --> 00:51:33,722
She's a bad investment.
998
00:51:33,763 --> 00:51:35,681
Now, Eugene has helped
me out with my investments.
999
00:51:35,931 --> 00:51:39,476
You know, precious metals, rare coins,
1000
00:51:39,559 --> 00:51:41,852
some old stamps, stuff like that.
1001
00:51:41,935 --> 00:51:44,604
-He says it's a ledge against inflation.
-Stamps.
1002
00:51:45,771 --> 00:51:47,564
(CAR HORNS BLARING)
1003
00:52:01,578 --> 00:52:04,664
Thank you. I'm just in time.
Do you sell stamps?
1004
00:52:05,414 --> 00:52:08,959
I think that you want
the stationery store across the street.
1005
00:52:09,000 --> 00:52:11,627
The stamps we have here
are very rare, very expensive.
1006
00:52:11,710 --> 00:52:12,711
How expensive?
1007
00:52:13,753 --> 00:52:17,173
-Well, let me show you, Mr., uh...
-Montgomery Brewster.
1008
00:52:17,256 --> 00:52:21,969
Montgomery Brewster! I have been
reading about you in the newspaper.
1009
00:52:22,052 --> 00:52:24,387
I'd like to see your most expensive stamp.
1010
00:52:24,470 --> 00:52:26,096
Ah! One moment.
1011
00:52:29,140 --> 00:52:31,142
This may be the first
intelligent thing he's done
1012
00:52:31,225 --> 00:52:32,684
with his money since he got it.
1013
00:52:32,767 --> 00:52:34,977
Maybe he's comin' to his senses, you know?
1014
00:52:35,060 --> 00:52:37,479
-What do you think?
-Hey, I'm gettin' paid to take pictures.
1015
00:52:37,520 --> 00:52:39,146
My job is not to interpret reality.
1016
00:52:40,480 --> 00:52:43,232
-You're a real jerk, you know that?
-Ain't that the truth.
1017
00:52:43,315 --> 00:52:45,525
(LAUGHS) Hey, tell it to my accountant.
1018
00:52:45,858 --> 00:52:50,529
As you can see, the airplane was
accidentally printed upside-down.
1019
00:52:50,987 --> 00:52:53,739
Of the 100 of these stamps originally printed,
1020
00:52:53,923 --> 00:52:55,925
this is the only known copy in existence.
1021
00:52:55,966 --> 00:52:57,425
(WHISTLES)
1022
00:52:57,508 --> 00:53:02,054
Baron Levitsky recently offered $850,000
for it, and I laughed in his face.
1023
00:53:05,057 --> 00:53:06,391
(LAUGHS)
1024
00:53:09,644 --> 00:53:12,730
I'd say the stamp he bought
is a considerable asset.
1025
00:53:13,188 --> 00:53:16,774
He doesn't even understand the rules yet.
Let's see him get out of this one.
1026
00:53:17,065 --> 00:53:18,691
(BOTH LAUGHING)
1027
00:53:20,234 --> 00:53:22,110
-Good morning, Mr. Granville.
-Good morning.
1028
00:53:22,151 --> 00:53:23,152
Here's the mail.
1029
00:53:23,235 --> 00:53:24,236
Thank you.
1030
00:53:24,277 --> 00:53:26,570
-Is there anything else I can do for you, sir?
-Hold on for a minute.
1031
00:53:26,611 --> 00:53:29,113
I may want to send you to the files.
1032
00:53:29,279 --> 00:53:30,280
Norris.
1033
00:53:30,363 --> 00:53:31,364
Hmm?
1034
00:53:31,822 --> 00:53:34,115
Hackensack Bulls. (CHUCKLES)
1035
00:53:35,241 --> 00:53:37,368
"Having a wonderful time.
Wish you were here.
1036
00:53:37,451 --> 00:53:40,245
"Best wishes, Monty Brewster."
1037
00:53:46,834 --> 00:53:50,629
God! It isn't an asset anymore. He's mailed it!
1038
00:53:52,088 --> 00:53:53,130
Get Cox over here.
1039
00:53:53,171 --> 00:53:54,172
Right away, sir.
1040
00:53:54,797 --> 00:53:56,173
The son of a bitch.
1041
00:53:56,923 --> 00:54:00,301
So, in strictest confidence,
you can see how vital it is to the firm
1042
00:54:00,384 --> 00:54:03,470
that Brewster does not
succeed in spending that $30 million, Warren.
1043
00:54:03,511 --> 00:54:05,763
He's made a fool of you and of your ex-wife.
1044
00:54:05,804 --> 00:54:07,931
We think he has designs
on your fiance as well.
1045
00:54:07,972 --> 00:54:11,976
A small error in bookkeeping discovered at
the last moment ought to do the trick.
1046
00:54:12,017 --> 00:54:14,894
Say, a $20,000 mistake in Brewster's favor.
1047
00:54:14,977 --> 00:54:16,269
It'll be our little insurance policy.
1048
00:54:16,310 --> 00:54:21,398
And the $300 million will go to the firm.
Granville, Baxter and Cox.
1049
00:54:21,481 --> 00:54:23,191
Welcome aboard, Warren.
1050
00:54:23,649 --> 00:54:27,235
The big story on Wall Street today
is that Icebergs International
1051
00:54:27,318 --> 00:54:29,320
has been bought out by Wometco Petroleum
1052
00:54:29,403 --> 00:54:32,781
in order to secure
tax benefits within the Common Market.
1053
00:54:32,822 --> 00:54:34,990
The buy-out will enable
the parent company to free up...
1054
00:54:35,031 --> 00:54:38,159
Is he a genius, or is he a genius? (LAUGHS)
1055
00:54:38,242 --> 00:54:39,785
Can't understand it, Mr. Brewster?
1056
00:54:39,826 --> 00:54:42,161
The stock, which was valued at 1.5,
1057
00:54:42,244 --> 00:54:44,663
now has a par value of over $9.00 a share.
1058
00:54:44,704 --> 00:54:45,746
In other news...
1059
00:54:45,829 --> 00:54:48,164
I want to sell my stock in the iceberg!
1060
00:54:48,205 --> 00:54:49,748
-Sell? Oh, no.
-Yeah!
1061
00:54:49,831 --> 00:54:51,582
That doesn't seem like a smart thing...
1062
00:54:51,665 --> 00:54:53,625
-Uh, Mr. Brewster...
-What?
1063
00:54:53,666 --> 00:54:55,209
You see, the parent company, Wometco,
1064
00:54:55,292 --> 00:54:58,503
is one of the strongest
organizations in the world petroleum market.
1065
00:54:58,586 --> 00:55:01,755
And they've been consistently good
performers in profits and dividends.
1066
00:55:01,838 --> 00:55:04,173
You don't want to sell, Mr. Brewster.
You've got a lot of obligations.
1067
00:55:04,256 --> 00:55:07,259
You got a huge payroll to meet,
you got overhead, retirement plans.
1068
00:55:07,342 --> 00:55:08,968
You don't want to lay anyone off, do ya?
1069
00:55:09,009 --> 00:55:10,385
No, I don't want to lay anyone off.
1070
00:55:15,723 --> 00:55:18,600
Count it. It's all there.
Nothing but long shots, huh?
1071
00:55:18,683 --> 00:55:21,519
Well, you just won yourself
a cool million-five, wise guy.
1072
00:55:21,560 --> 00:55:22,936
(SPIKE AND ANGELA WHOOPING)
1073
00:55:23,019 --> 00:55:26,605
The word is out on you.
I had to lay these bets off all over town.
1074
00:55:26,688 --> 00:55:29,023
You don't make another bet
in this city again, ever!
1075
00:55:29,064 --> 00:55:31,858
-I just...
-Loyola 18, Notre Dame, zilch.
1076
00:55:31,941 --> 00:55:33,150
Thanks a lot, baby.
1077
00:55:33,191 --> 00:55:34,233
(BLOWS RASPBERRY)
1078
00:55:34,358 --> 00:55:35,525
This is unreported income,
1079
00:55:35,608 --> 00:55:37,735
gained from an illegal venture, Mr. Brewster.
1080
00:55:37,818 --> 00:55:40,862
I would recommend you immediately
dispatch a courier to Switzerland
1081
00:55:41,237 --> 00:55:43,364
and deposit this money
in a secret numbered account.
1082
00:55:43,614 --> 00:55:45,741
I don't want it! I'm gonna give it to charity!
1083
00:55:45,824 --> 00:55:48,034
-What's your favorite charity?
-Oh, I don't know.
1084
00:55:48,117 --> 00:55:51,829
-There are so many worthwhile charities.
-So many worthwhile charities!
1085
00:55:52,037 --> 00:55:55,623
Good. Divide it up amongst the many
charities, and give it to them.
1086
00:55:55,706 --> 00:55:58,250
And everybody go back to work,
because this is a business.
1087
00:55:58,333 --> 00:56:00,877
And we're in the business of being in
business, and we're doin' business.
1088
00:56:00,918 --> 00:56:03,211
And nobody's business. Do it.
Business. Good.
1089
00:56:03,753 --> 00:56:06,213
I want business done.
That's the way it should be.
1090
00:56:06,588 --> 00:56:08,464
-When you do business...
-(DOOR CLOSES)
1091
00:56:09,089 --> 00:56:11,800
That was so wonderful,
what you just did in there.
1092
00:56:11,883 --> 00:56:14,427
Look, I know you think
I'm always complaining, but it's not that.
1093
00:56:14,510 --> 00:56:17,679
It's just that I can't stand seeing these
people take advantage of you anymore.
1094
00:56:17,720 --> 00:56:20,681
Miss Drake, I'm very sorry.
And I appreciate what you're trying to do.
1095
00:56:20,722 --> 00:56:23,516
-But you don't know what I'm trying to do.
-What are you trying to do?
1096
00:56:23,557 --> 00:56:26,393
-What I'm trying to do...
-Oh, Monty?
1097
00:56:27,936 --> 00:56:30,438
Could you step in here for a moment, please?
1098
00:56:30,521 --> 00:56:32,564
-Of course, Marilyn.
-Good afternoon, Angela.
1099
00:56:32,647 --> 00:56:35,232
-Hello, Marilyn.
-Well, Monty...
1100
00:56:36,107 --> 00:56:38,651
What do you think
of our postmodern fantasy?
1101
00:56:38,734 --> 00:56:40,235
Well, darling,
1102
00:56:40,276 --> 00:56:42,111
Marilyn's really outdone
herself this time, don't you think?
1103
00:56:42,194 --> 00:56:44,321
-Oh, Warren. (CHUCKLES)
-It's good!
1104
00:56:44,404 --> 00:56:47,073
It is very good, Marilyn. But it's not great.
1105
00:56:47,490 --> 00:56:50,367
You see, Marilyn, I want you to reach deep
down inside yourself this time,
1106
00:56:50,408 --> 00:56:52,952
and come up with something
specifically unique.
1107
00:56:53,410 --> 00:56:55,745
I want to walk in this room and say to myself,
1108
00:56:55,828 --> 00:56:58,622
"Monty, I want to die in this room."
1109
00:56:59,414 --> 00:57:02,083
I want to die in this room, Marilyn.
1110
00:57:02,166 --> 00:57:03,750
And double the workmen's salary.
1111
00:57:03,833 --> 00:57:05,793
I mean, they look exhausted.
1112
00:57:05,876 --> 00:57:08,503
Help out! Come on! It's a business!
1113
00:57:10,129 --> 00:57:13,507
Angela, I'm not going to be
able to make dinner, darling.
1114
00:57:13,590 --> 00:57:15,675
There's just too much
to be done around here.
1115
00:57:16,092 --> 00:57:18,094
Whatever you say, Warren.
1116
00:57:19,261 --> 00:57:21,304
A room you want to die in.
1117
00:57:22,388 --> 00:57:24,431
-What? What?
-What were you trying to tell me before?
1118
00:57:24,472 --> 00:57:26,557
Miss Drake, I don't know how
to explain this to you, but...
1119
00:57:26,598 --> 00:57:29,309
Even though I'm not
the person that you thought I was,
1120
00:57:29,392 --> 00:57:32,019
I'm not the person that
you think I am now, either.
1121
00:57:32,102 --> 00:57:34,979
Yes, but I don't understand why when you
make money you get so miserable,
1122
00:57:35,163 --> 00:57:36,873
then when you lose it, you act so happy.
1123
00:57:36,914 --> 00:57:38,999
Uh, that's because I can't
get used to being rich.
1124
00:57:39,040 --> 00:57:41,751
But you could do great things with all
that money. You mustn't squander it.
1125
00:57:41,834 --> 00:57:43,877
Squander it? What are you talking about?
I'm making millions.
1126
00:57:44,168 --> 00:57:45,752
BREWSTER: We didn't get off
to a very good start.
1127
00:57:45,835 --> 00:57:48,838
And I thought we'd take a little
ride and get to know each other.
1128
00:57:48,879 --> 00:57:51,047
You'll find out I'm not
such a bad guy, after all.
1129
00:57:51,130 --> 00:57:52,798
Miss Drake, your chariot awaits!
1130
00:57:52,881 --> 00:57:55,049
Oh, no, Mr. Brewster. I can't accept this.
1131
00:57:55,132 --> 00:57:57,342
This is a $125,000 car.
1132
00:57:57,383 --> 00:57:59,885
Eugene said I needed a tax write-off.
1133
00:58:00,176 --> 00:58:02,845
Can't we just take a ride
without having an argument?
1134
00:58:02,886 --> 00:58:04,888
I promise not to spend any money,
1135
00:58:04,971 --> 00:58:07,181
except on you for lunch.
1136
00:58:07,890 --> 00:58:10,475
All right, but just to eat lunch,
and then that's it.
1137
00:58:21,736 --> 00:58:24,405
-So where shall we go?
-You're driving.
1138
00:58:24,488 --> 00:58:27,157
Oh, I know this nice little
restaurant near the place I grew up.
1139
00:58:28,032 --> 00:58:29,825
-Now, it's not fancy, but...
-(TIRES SCREECH)
1140
00:58:30,492 --> 00:58:33,786
-What the... Are you all right?
-I think so.
1141
00:58:33,869 --> 00:58:35,453
-You sure?
-Yeah.
1142
00:58:41,292 --> 00:58:42,626
I'm terribly sorry.
1143
00:58:42,709 --> 00:58:45,086
The parking attendant left my car in first.
1144
00:58:45,127 --> 00:58:47,254
And when I turned on
the ignition, it shot forward.
1145
00:58:47,337 --> 00:58:48,421
Are you all right?
1146
00:58:48,462 --> 00:58:50,046
-Yes.
-Fine, fine, but you look hurt.
1147
00:58:50,296 --> 00:58:51,588
Honestly, I'm fine.
1148
00:58:51,671 --> 00:58:53,881
Look, look, here's my driver's license.
1149
00:58:54,256 --> 00:58:57,050
Great! Great! Don't be ridiculous.
Put that away.
1150
00:58:57,091 --> 00:59:00,094
You're in a state of shock. Emotional trauma.
1151
00:59:00,177 --> 00:59:01,178
What are you talking about?
1152
00:59:01,261 --> 00:59:02,303
Brain damage.
1153
00:59:02,386 --> 00:59:04,096
He's got brain damage
and doesn't even know it.
1154
00:59:04,179 --> 00:59:06,472
Hey, George! Get an ambulance!
1155
00:59:07,014 --> 00:59:09,182
Are you all right, Mr. Brewster?
1156
00:59:09,390 --> 00:59:11,850
Brewster? Montgomery Brewster?
1157
00:59:11,933 --> 00:59:13,684
Yes, that's me. See?
1158
00:59:14,851 --> 00:59:18,104
I really don't feel very good.
I'm starting to lose feeling in my legs.
1159
00:59:18,145 --> 00:59:20,647
Oh, stop it! Can't you see this man is faking?
1160
00:59:20,730 --> 00:59:22,231
Faking? I can't have this on my conscience.
1161
00:59:22,272 --> 00:59:24,691
This man's going to be paralyzed for life.
1162
00:59:24,774 --> 00:59:27,109
Dear sir, do you think
you could settle this out of court
1163
00:59:27,192 --> 00:59:29,527
for a couple of hundred thousand dollars?
1164
00:59:29,610 --> 00:59:31,069
Two ex-wives.
1165
00:59:31,402 --> 00:59:32,861
Two ex-wives?
1166
00:59:33,444 --> 00:59:35,237
300,000?
1167
00:59:35,445 --> 00:59:36,696
You go to the doctor's right away, okay?
1168
00:59:36,779 --> 00:59:37,780
Uh-huh.
1169
00:59:37,863 --> 00:59:42,117
And you're giving him this
for a prescription, and you'll be all right.
1170
00:59:42,784 --> 00:59:43,785
Thank you.
1171
00:59:43,868 --> 00:59:44,869
Have a good day!
1172
00:59:46,370 --> 00:59:48,455
BREWSTER: Get a cold compress
for that thing on your head,
1173
00:59:48,538 --> 00:59:50,289
and a large bottle of Aspirin!
1174
00:59:50,789 --> 00:59:52,040
Nice man.
1175
00:59:53,124 --> 00:59:55,126
See, the check will be a receipt.
1176
00:59:55,167 --> 00:59:57,544
Well, I'm starving.
I'm ready to go to lunch now.
1177
00:59:57,627 --> 00:59:58,753
I wanna meet your family.
1178
00:59:58,794 --> 00:59:59,878
-Meet my family?
-Yeah.
1179
00:59:59,961 --> 01:00:01,170
What do you wanna do? Buy 'em?
1180
01:00:01,253 --> 01:00:04,339
I would be ashamed to introduce
my family to somebody like you!
1181
01:00:04,464 --> 01:00:06,632
Angela! Wait. Listen to me.
1182
01:00:06,715 --> 01:00:08,967
Angela! Will you wait a minute?
1183
01:00:09,050 --> 01:00:11,302
I did the best I could.
That wasn't that man's fault.
1184
01:00:11,343 --> 01:00:12,385
Yes, I know it wasn't.
1185
01:00:12,468 --> 01:00:13,969
But the first time
you get some money, what do you do?
1186
01:00:14,052 --> 01:00:17,221
You spend it and show off.
You just gave away $300,000!
1187
01:00:17,554 --> 01:00:18,930
MARILYN: Oh, my God.
1188
01:00:20,806 --> 01:00:22,140
-Oh, look at that.
-Yeah.
1189
01:00:22,181 --> 01:00:23,265
Oh, is that awful.
1190
01:00:23,682 --> 01:00:26,309
I don't believe it. Oh, how tasteless.
1191
01:00:27,268 --> 01:00:29,853
Boy, that girl is ungrateful,
considering all the things
1192
01:00:29,936 --> 01:00:32,355
you've done to try to improve her.
1193
01:00:33,022 --> 01:00:35,816
I just think this is unforgivable.
1194
01:00:38,735 --> 01:00:39,777
Thank you.
1195
01:00:43,322 --> 01:00:44,906
I realize you're not very interested
1196
01:00:44,989 --> 01:00:46,323
in what Marilyn and I are doing,
1197
01:00:46,406 --> 01:00:49,826
but we have a real shot
at getting our work into AD next month.
1198
01:00:49,867 --> 01:00:51,451
AD?
1199
01:00:51,492 --> 01:00:53,160
Architectural Digest.
1200
01:00:54,244 --> 01:00:56,454
ANGELA: That's really wonderful.
I'm very happy for you and Marilyn.
1201
01:00:56,495 --> 01:00:57,496
WARREN: Are you all right?
1202
01:00:57,579 --> 01:01:00,582
Look, Warren,
I'm not very happy with this whole situation.
1203
01:01:00,665 --> 01:01:02,541
You could have fooled me.
1204
01:01:02,624 --> 01:01:03,916
What's that supposed to mean?
1205
01:01:03,999 --> 01:01:07,502
It means that you and Monty seem to
be getting along awfully well.
1206
01:01:07,877 --> 01:01:10,004
And give everybody else in
here whatever they're drinking.
1207
01:01:10,045 --> 01:01:12,172
It doesn't matter.
Champagne, anything, as long as I'm here.
1208
01:01:12,255 --> 01:01:13,422
Yes, sir, Mr. Brewster.
1209
01:01:13,755 --> 01:01:15,923
Drinks on the house!
Courtesy of Mr. Brewster.
1210
01:01:16,006 --> 01:01:17,173
(DINERS CHEERING)
1211
01:01:17,256 --> 01:01:20,008
FLEMING: Well, Monty
Brewster's extravagance knows no bounds.
1212
01:01:20,091 --> 01:01:23,177
After paying the highest-recorded
price ever for a stamp,
1213
01:01:23,218 --> 01:01:26,346
Brewster today shelled out a record $600,000
1214
01:01:26,387 --> 01:01:29,556
for five cases of 114-year-old French wine.
1215
01:01:29,847 --> 01:01:31,890
He stunned the crowd here
at Weatherby's auction house
1216
01:01:31,973 --> 01:01:34,225
by not only paying in cash for the wine,
1217
01:01:34,308 --> 01:01:36,059
but by opening all 60 bottles
1218
01:01:36,142 --> 01:01:38,310
at a reception for the public afterwards.
1219
01:01:38,351 --> 01:01:39,977
At $10,000 a bottle,
1220
01:01:40,018 --> 01:01:43,104
that is gotta be the most expensive hangover
this reporter's ever heard of.
1221
01:01:43,187 --> 01:01:44,479
Chuck Fleming. Action News.
1222
01:01:49,901 --> 01:01:51,444
-Angela?
-What?
1223
01:01:52,194 --> 01:01:54,297
I asked if your feelings had changed.
1224
01:01:54,338 --> 01:01:55,922
Look, how can I make it any clearer for you?
1225
01:01:56,213 --> 01:01:58,256
Can you please pay for the drinks
and let's get out of here?
1226
01:01:58,297 --> 01:02:00,173
We don't have to pay for the drinks.
They're on Monty.
1227
01:02:02,800 --> 01:02:04,301
-Brewster?
-Yes?
1228
01:02:05,010 --> 01:02:07,887
Looks like you've
got a busy evening ahead of you.
1229
01:02:07,970 --> 01:02:09,513
Yeah, I'm too busy to have fun.
1230
01:02:09,596 --> 01:02:11,180
I got to spend money, right?
1231
01:02:11,263 --> 01:02:14,015
I must say, mailing that
stamp was quite ingenious.
1232
01:02:14,098 --> 01:02:16,100
You liked that? How about the wine auction?
1233
01:02:16,141 --> 01:02:17,809
Again, very imaginative.
1234
01:02:17,850 --> 01:02:20,811
I understand it cost $600,000,
according to Miss Drake.
1235
01:02:23,480 --> 01:02:25,899
BREWSTER: There she goes again, as usual.
1236
01:02:25,982 --> 01:02:29,652
I am sick and tired
of acting like a rich asshole for everybody.
1237
01:02:29,693 --> 01:02:30,694
I'm fed up.
1238
01:02:30,777 --> 01:02:33,321
Maybe I should've took
Uncle Rupert's wimp clause.
1239
01:02:33,362 --> 01:02:35,280
I don't think I'm gonna pull this off, do you?
1240
01:02:35,321 --> 01:02:36,655
I don't know, Mr. Brewster.
1241
01:02:36,738 --> 01:02:38,239
But that baseball game you're planning
1242
01:02:38,322 --> 01:02:40,157
sounds like a step in the right direction.
1243
01:02:44,953 --> 01:02:48,706
My left leg. See? I planted it down wrong.
I was off-balance.
1244
01:02:51,166 --> 01:02:54,460
Ooh! Go ahead, Monty.
Now that's the Monty I know.
1245
01:02:54,543 --> 01:02:55,585
-That's it.
-Hi, Monty.
1246
01:02:55,668 --> 01:02:56,877
How's it going, buddy?
1247
01:02:56,960 --> 01:02:58,544
(LAUGHING)
1248
01:02:58,627 --> 01:02:59,628
Tell him the good news, Eugene.
1249
01:02:59,669 --> 01:03:00,920
No, you tell him. It was your idea.
1250
01:03:01,003 --> 01:03:02,713
All right, I got some good
news and some bad news for you.
1251
01:03:02,796 --> 01:03:04,672
-Well, tell him the bad news first.
-All right, all right.
1252
01:03:04,713 --> 01:03:06,756
Here's the bad news.
I did exactly what you wanted me to do.
1253
01:03:06,839 --> 01:03:08,757
I got rid of all your iceberg stocks.
1254
01:03:08,840 --> 01:03:10,842
-That's great.
-That's the bad news.
1255
01:03:10,883 --> 01:03:12,009
-You ready for the good news?
-Yeah.
1256
01:03:12,092 --> 01:03:13,843
Okay, here it comes.
I took Eugene's advice, all right?
1257
01:03:13,926 --> 01:03:16,929
Admittedly, without you knowing, I used the
corporate name. I hope you don't mind.
1258
01:03:17,012 --> 01:03:19,222
-No, no.
-I made some investments for you.
1259
01:03:19,305 --> 01:03:20,597
-That's okay.
-What did I buy?
1260
01:03:20,680 --> 01:03:23,140
I bought a commodity thing
and I bought an oil well thing.
1261
01:03:23,181 --> 01:03:24,765
He just made you $10 million.
1262
01:03:24,848 --> 01:03:25,890
$10 million!
1263
01:03:25,973 --> 01:03:27,683
(WHOOPING)
1264
01:03:27,724 --> 01:03:29,517
Isn't that wonderful?
1265
01:03:29,600 --> 01:03:31,852
(BOTH CHANTING)
$10 million, $10 million, $10 million!
1266
01:03:34,688 --> 01:03:36,690
No! Damn it!
1267
01:03:36,731 --> 01:03:39,525
I'm right back where I started, damn it!
1268
01:03:44,363 --> 01:03:45,530
Jesus.
1269
01:03:47,698 --> 01:03:51,785
$10 million. $10 million.
1270
01:03:54,537 --> 01:03:56,914
What's the matter, Monty? I mean...
1271
01:03:56,997 --> 01:03:59,541
I make the guy $10 million
and he acts like it's a funeral.
1272
01:03:59,582 --> 01:04:00,833
(CHUCKLES)
1273
01:04:00,874 --> 01:04:03,084
It's American money, you know.
1274
01:04:03,459 --> 01:04:04,960
Congratulations.
1275
01:04:05,293 --> 01:04:08,004
About that furniture
you wanted Marilyn and me to rent,
1276
01:04:08,045 --> 01:04:09,713
I'm afraid the company's requiring
1277
01:04:10,046 --> 01:04:12,840
a substantial cash deposit. $20,000.
1278
01:04:17,219 --> 01:04:20,263
$20,000. Hey, don't forget.
1279
01:04:20,638 --> 01:04:23,057
To give Angela the receipt? I know.
1280
01:04:23,140 --> 01:04:24,975
Have to keep those books straight,
don't we, darling?
1281
01:04:25,058 --> 01:04:26,142
Yeah.
1282
01:04:27,309 --> 01:04:28,560
So long.
1283
01:04:37,819 --> 01:04:40,446
I'd like to be alone. By myself.
1284
01:04:40,904 --> 01:04:42,238
Sure. There's no problem there, Monty.
1285
01:04:42,321 --> 01:04:44,364
You know, you're probably
getting psyched up for the Yankee game.
1286
01:04:44,405 --> 01:04:45,572
That's what he always does this, you know.
1287
01:04:45,655 --> 01:04:47,031
He gets a little cranky like this.
1288
01:04:47,072 --> 01:04:49,074
It's only 'cause he's getting
psyched up for a big game.
1289
01:04:49,115 --> 01:04:51,659
You know, sometimes
it works, sometimes it doesn't.
1290
01:04:52,076 --> 01:04:54,328
This time we'll just leave him alone.
1291
01:04:55,245 --> 01:04:56,329
I don't get it.
1292
01:04:56,412 --> 01:04:57,746
Yeah, what the hell is with him?
1293
01:04:57,829 --> 01:05:00,748
I think we should consider the
possibility of psychiatric help.
1294
01:05:00,789 --> 01:05:01,831
What are you? Nuts?
1295
01:05:02,081 --> 01:05:03,916
(SCREAMS)
1296
01:05:12,507 --> 01:05:13,591
Okay.
1297
01:05:18,887 --> 01:05:21,347
With less than two weeks
remaining until the election,
1298
01:05:21,430 --> 01:05:23,432
this station is sorry to report
1299
01:05:23,515 --> 01:05:25,475
that it finds itself unable to endorse
1300
01:05:25,558 --> 01:05:28,269
either of the candidates
for mayor of New York.
1301
01:05:28,352 --> 01:05:30,187
Both Mr. Heller and Mr. Salvino
1302
01:05:30,770 --> 01:05:33,147
have been pumping
scandalous amounts of money
1303
01:05:33,230 --> 01:05:35,565
into slick advertising campaigns
1304
01:05:35,606 --> 01:05:38,442
that so far have demonstrated
little more than their ability
1305
01:05:38,525 --> 01:05:42,153
to slander each other
and squander campaign contributions.
1306
01:05:42,236 --> 01:05:43,737
In the view of this station,
1307
01:05:43,778 --> 01:05:46,906
the only issue being raised
by the Heller-Salvino debate
1308
01:05:46,947 --> 01:05:49,616
is whether the city of New York is for sale,
1309
01:05:49,657 --> 01:05:52,701
and just how much slush money
it will take to buy it.
1310
01:05:58,039 --> 01:06:01,125
Running for political office
is extremely expensive, unless you win.
1311
01:06:01,166 --> 01:06:02,917
And it's unheard of
to do it with your own money.
1312
01:06:02,958 --> 01:06:04,334
Yeah. What does he know about politics?
1313
01:06:04,417 --> 01:06:05,459
That is not the point.
1314
01:06:05,500 --> 01:06:07,418
He's trying to do some good with his money.
1315
01:06:07,459 --> 01:06:09,169
Look, I've finally figured this whole thing out.
1316
01:06:09,252 --> 01:06:11,128
That's why he gets so upset
when he makes a profit.
1317
01:06:11,169 --> 01:06:12,879
'Cause it makes him feel guilty.
1318
01:06:13,379 --> 01:06:15,798
He's trying to do the right thing
for once in his life.
1319
01:06:17,382 --> 01:06:19,384
(CLAMORING)
1320
01:06:19,467 --> 01:06:20,468
Mr. Brewster!
1321
01:06:21,760 --> 01:06:22,802
Mr. Brewster!
1322
01:06:22,885 --> 01:06:25,345
Mr. Brewster! Mr. Brewster!
1323
01:06:25,428 --> 01:06:26,929
Could you please give us your reasons
1324
01:06:26,970 --> 01:06:29,472
for your sudden and unexpected candidacy?
1325
01:06:29,805 --> 01:06:32,241
I figure voting for Salvino or Heller
1326
01:06:32,282 --> 01:06:34,242
is just as silly as them running for office.
1327
01:06:34,325 --> 01:06:35,492
Which is just as silly
as me running for office.
1328
01:06:35,575 --> 01:06:36,576
(REPORTERS LAUGHING)
1329
01:06:36,617 --> 01:06:39,286
The only thing not silly
is the power of the people's vote.
1330
01:06:39,369 --> 01:06:41,120
And I think the people should use it
1331
01:06:41,203 --> 01:06:44,748
to vote for none of the above.
1332
01:06:44,831 --> 01:06:46,290
(REPORTERS CLAMORING)
1333
01:06:47,457 --> 01:06:49,250
Mr. Brewster, are we to understand
1334
01:06:49,333 --> 01:06:51,668
that you actually don't want
anyone to vote for you?
1335
01:06:51,751 --> 01:06:54,920
What I'm saying is
I think only an idiot would vote for me.
1336
01:06:55,003 --> 01:06:56,087
(ALL MURMURING)
1337
01:06:56,128 --> 01:07:00,423
Mr. Brewster, have you taken positions
on any of the issues facing the city?
1338
01:07:00,464 --> 01:07:02,591
Sanitation, union corruption,
urban renewal...
1339
01:07:02,632 --> 01:07:04,592
Let's get to the bottom line, right?
1340
01:07:04,633 --> 01:07:06,509
I'm here to buy your votes.
1341
01:07:06,592 --> 01:07:10,220
With only 10 days, Mr. Brewster,
with only 10 days left before the election,
1342
01:07:10,261 --> 01:07:12,763
how do you expect to find
that kind of support for that position?
1343
01:07:12,846 --> 01:07:14,597
I don't expect to get support.
1344
01:07:14,680 --> 01:07:15,806
In fact, I'm asking people
1345
01:07:15,889 --> 01:07:17,557
not to send money in to my candidacy.
1346
01:07:17,723 --> 01:07:19,725
I think the people should keep their money.
1347
01:07:19,766 --> 01:07:21,184
They're gonna need it after this election.
1348
01:07:29,483 --> 01:07:30,859
(MACHINE WHIRRING)
1349
01:07:51,337 --> 01:07:53,797
Monty Brewster. That's me, right?
1350
01:07:54,255 --> 01:07:59,301
And tonight, I'm here to talk to
you about "None of the above".
1351
01:07:59,968 --> 01:08:01,636
You know how it is around election time
1352
01:08:01,719 --> 01:08:03,011
and you decide not to vote
1353
01:08:03,094 --> 01:08:06,180
because the two candidates are so repulsive.
1354
01:08:07,055 --> 01:08:09,599
Repulsive's not the word.
We're all full of shit.
1355
01:08:09,974 --> 01:08:11,392
I didn't think you were supposed to use
1356
01:08:11,475 --> 01:08:13,268
that kind of language on television.
1357
01:08:13,643 --> 01:08:16,145
Maybe he's just trying to get his point across.
1358
01:08:16,311 --> 01:08:19,314
I never wear a suit and a tie. Never.
1359
01:08:19,981 --> 01:08:23,109
I mean, these are just things
that politicians use
1360
01:08:23,150 --> 01:08:26,361
to trick you into thinking
that they're respectable.
1361
01:08:26,444 --> 01:08:28,237
Well... To the politician, huh?
1362
01:08:43,335 --> 01:08:45,503
He bought prime time on every station?
1363
01:08:45,586 --> 01:08:47,421
Worse than that, he's on network.
1364
01:08:47,504 --> 01:08:49,672
He's running spots in all 52 states
1365
01:08:49,755 --> 01:08:51,882
just in case any New Yorkers are on vacation.
1366
01:08:51,965 --> 01:08:55,009
Write in "None of the above" on your ballot.
1367
01:08:55,592 --> 01:08:58,386
Don't vote for any of us. We're assholes.
1368
01:08:58,928 --> 01:09:01,555
We'll only make things worse.
1369
01:09:02,097 --> 01:09:03,765
Let's drink to it.
1370
01:09:13,983 --> 01:09:15,526
(BAND PLAYING LIVELY MUSIC)
1371
01:09:19,530 --> 01:09:20,864
(CROWD CHEERING)
1372
01:09:32,375 --> 01:09:33,626
(INAUDIBLE)
1373
01:09:41,634 --> 01:09:44,386
I wanna thank you for coming out today
1374
01:09:44,427 --> 01:09:49,390
to see to it that neither my
opponents nor me win the election.
1375
01:09:49,807 --> 01:09:51,266
(CHEERING)
1376
01:09:56,771 --> 01:09:58,564
I wanna ask the question.
1377
01:10:01,567 --> 01:10:02,859
Who's buying the booze?
1378
01:10:02,900 --> 01:10:04,568
ALL: You are!
1379
01:10:04,609 --> 01:10:06,027
Who's buying the food?
1380
01:10:06,068 --> 01:10:07,444
ALL: You are!
1381
01:10:08,403 --> 01:10:10,655
And who's tryin' to buy your vote?
1382
01:10:10,738 --> 01:10:12,114
ALL: You are!
1383
01:10:12,197 --> 01:10:13,740
And who you're gonna vote for?
1384
01:10:13,823 --> 01:10:15,699
ALL: None of the above!
1385
01:10:15,740 --> 01:10:16,741
Say it again!
1386
01:10:16,991 --> 01:10:18,409
None of the above!
1387
01:10:18,492 --> 01:10:20,243
Let me hear it one more time!
1388
01:10:20,326 --> 01:10:22,077
None of the above!
1389
01:10:24,079 --> 01:10:25,371
CROWD: (CHANTING) Brewster! Brewster!
1390
01:10:58,695 --> 01:11:00,071
NEWSCASTER:
Well, you can call it outrageous.
1391
01:11:00,112 --> 01:11:01,696
You can call it a breath of fresh air.
1392
01:11:01,779 --> 01:11:04,656
But what you can
no longer call it is a joke campaign.
1393
01:11:04,989 --> 01:11:07,783
The eccentric multimillionaire
Montgomery Brewster
1394
01:11:07,866 --> 01:11:09,200
is electrifying crowds
1395
01:11:09,450 --> 01:11:11,285
and is starting to show up in the polls.
1396
01:11:11,326 --> 01:11:12,785
All this reporter can say is
1397
01:11:12,826 --> 01:11:14,953
I hate to see
what he could do if he was serious.
1398
01:11:53,157 --> 01:11:54,992
So, what do you wanna talk about?
1399
01:11:55,033 --> 01:11:56,325
What do I wanna talk about?
1400
01:11:56,366 --> 01:11:57,575
Your people called my people.
1401
01:11:57,658 --> 01:11:59,826
Bullshit. Your people made the first move.
1402
01:11:59,867 --> 01:12:02,452
What's the difference?
We both got the same problem.
1403
01:12:02,493 --> 01:12:04,328
-Brewster.
-Yeah, no kiddin'.
1404
01:12:04,369 --> 01:12:06,371
You heard what he said about us
in a speech yesterday.
1405
01:12:06,454 --> 01:12:08,539
Here, I'll quote it for you.
1406
01:12:09,831 --> 01:12:14,043
"Heller and Salvino are both just a couple
of overgrown wharf rats.
1407
01:12:14,168 --> 01:12:18,505
"Why else would anybody spend $10 million
to get a $60,000-a-year job
1408
01:12:18,588 --> 01:12:21,173
"unless he planned
to steal it back with interest?"
1409
01:12:21,506 --> 01:12:24,008
You and I are gonna sue him
for every cent he's got.
1410
01:12:24,341 --> 01:12:27,344
That's very good, Heller. Very good.
1411
01:12:45,945 --> 01:12:47,446
(REPORTERS CLAMORING)
1412
01:12:48,488 --> 01:12:51,199
I called 'em a couple of overgrown wharf rats
1413
01:12:51,282 --> 01:12:53,200
and I had to pay 'em $4 million
1414
01:12:53,241 --> 01:12:54,825
for the emotional damage it did.
1415
01:12:54,866 --> 01:12:56,242
You don't have to take to these guys, Monty.
1416
01:12:56,325 --> 01:12:57,868
What do you think of
your opponents now, Mr. Brewster?
1417
01:12:57,909 --> 01:13:00,077
I think they're slime.
You can quote me on that.
1418
01:13:00,160 --> 01:13:01,286
Don't quote him on that, please.
1419
01:13:01,369 --> 01:13:02,536
He didn't mean anything by that.
1420
01:13:02,577 --> 01:13:04,328
REPORTER: Any prediction
on the game this afternoon?
1421
01:13:04,369 --> 01:13:05,828
I'm takin' that game more serious
1422
01:13:05,869 --> 01:13:07,662
than I am this election, I can tell you that.
1423
01:13:07,703 --> 01:13:10,139
Can we take anything
you say seriously, Mr. Brewster?
1424
01:13:10,180 --> 01:13:11,389
It's like that old saying,
1425
01:13:11,472 --> 01:13:13,348
"If bullshit were money, I'd be a millionaire."
1426
01:13:13,598 --> 01:13:15,558
-Well, I'm a millionaire.
-(ALL LAUGHING)
1427
01:13:15,641 --> 01:13:17,017
(ALL CLAMORING)
1428
01:13:19,019 --> 01:13:21,646
He didn't mean that.
You can't quote him on that.
1429
01:13:21,729 --> 01:13:23,439
Don't you dare quote him on that.
1430
01:13:27,484 --> 01:13:29,861
Oh, God, you must be
so nervous about this game today.
1431
01:13:29,944 --> 01:13:31,070
You put everything into it.
1432
01:13:31,278 --> 01:13:33,071
Not everything, but a lot.
1433
01:13:33,154 --> 01:13:36,532
This is my big day.
I'm pitching against the New York Yankees.
1434
01:13:36,615 --> 01:13:39,659
I can get any team out for three innings.
Any team.
1435
01:13:40,076 --> 01:13:41,869
VIN: Good afternoon, sports fans.
1436
01:13:41,952 --> 01:13:45,330
And the New York Yankee
Baseball Network is on the air.
1437
01:13:45,413 --> 01:13:48,165
We've got a special
edition of Yankee baseball,
1438
01:13:48,206 --> 01:13:50,833
a special three-inning exhibition game
1439
01:13:50,916 --> 01:13:53,793
between the New York Yankees
and are you ready for this?
1440
01:13:53,834 --> 01:13:56,127
The Hackensack Bulls.
1441
01:13:56,293 --> 01:13:58,169
BREWSTER:
I know they're the New York Yankees.
1442
01:13:58,210 --> 01:14:00,503
You know how many years
I sat around listening to you guys
1443
01:14:00,586 --> 01:14:03,171
complaining about you never get your shot?
1444
01:14:03,379 --> 01:14:05,381
Well, today we get our shot.
1445
01:14:05,464 --> 01:14:07,591
There's gonna be sports writers out there.
1446
01:14:07,674 --> 01:14:10,510
Newscasters, TV, radio.
1447
01:14:11,010 --> 01:14:13,804
Johnson, you're 26 years old, right?
1448
01:14:14,221 --> 01:14:16,806
You got a great glove. Perfect swing.
1449
01:14:17,056 --> 01:14:18,599
But if you don't
show your stuff out there today,
1450
01:14:18,682 --> 01:14:20,767
nobody's ever gonna know it, man.
1451
01:14:20,850 --> 01:14:23,227
Hey, you guys!
Let's go out there and kick a little ass!
1452
01:14:23,310 --> 01:14:24,936
(PLAYERS CHEERING)
1453
01:14:26,479 --> 01:14:29,940
And the Hackensack Bulls
take the playing field!
1454
01:14:30,315 --> 01:14:31,524
(CROWD CHEERING)
1455
01:14:36,737 --> 01:14:38,530
That was a great speech you made, Brewster.
1456
01:14:38,905 --> 01:14:40,281
I know you got something to prove,
1457
01:14:40,364 --> 01:14:42,449
but please don't try to show these guys up.
1458
01:14:53,376 --> 01:14:54,418
MAN: Let's go, Brew!
1459
01:14:54,751 --> 01:14:56,252
Monty looks so tiny out there.
1460
01:14:56,335 --> 01:14:58,211
Those Yankees look so big. Can he get hurt?
1461
01:14:58,252 --> 01:14:59,253
Nah. This ain't football.
1462
01:14:59,336 --> 01:15:00,879
All they're gonna do
is just take into his fast balls
1463
01:15:00,962 --> 01:15:02,588
and dent some cars out in the parkin' lot.
1464
01:15:03,547 --> 01:15:04,673
I better move my limousine.
1465
01:15:04,714 --> 01:15:05,715
(HORN BLARING)
1466
01:15:06,549 --> 01:15:08,425
No votes for Brewster!
1467
01:15:08,508 --> 01:15:09,967
(CROWD CHEERING)
1468
01:15:14,179 --> 01:15:15,889
None of the above!
1469
01:15:16,431 --> 01:15:17,807
Hear this crowd go crazy.
1470
01:15:17,890 --> 01:15:19,725
That's for Montgomery Brewster.
1471
01:15:19,766 --> 01:15:22,602
That financial-world wizard
who came on the scene not long ago
1472
01:15:22,685 --> 01:15:25,896
and continues to thrill and delight
the fans of this stadium.
1473
01:15:26,187 --> 01:15:29,106
None of the above! None of the above!
1474
01:15:31,358 --> 01:15:32,734
All right! Let's play ball.
1475
01:15:37,447 --> 01:15:38,823
Hackensack Bulls, huh?
1476
01:15:38,906 --> 01:15:39,948
That's the name.
1477
01:15:40,031 --> 01:15:42,241
Robby digs in and we're under way.
1478
01:15:42,282 --> 01:15:44,409
Monty Brewster peers in at his sign
1479
01:15:44,492 --> 01:15:46,035
and kicks in the first pitch.
1480
01:15:47,494 --> 01:15:48,786
Change-up?
1481
01:15:48,869 --> 01:15:50,036
No, that was his fastball.
1482
01:15:50,161 --> 01:15:51,203
Breaking ball,
1483
01:15:51,244 --> 01:15:53,454
I guess you'd
have to call that his change-up, eh, Biff?
1484
01:15:59,626 --> 01:16:01,169
VIN: Swing on, it's a hotshot.
1485
01:16:01,252 --> 01:16:02,378
Out!
1486
01:16:02,419 --> 01:16:03,878
(COMMENTARY CONTINUES INDISTINCTLY)
1487
01:16:06,547 --> 01:16:07,589
You are out.
1488
01:16:09,132 --> 01:16:12,593
Mr. Rough-and-Ready, Ken Dixon
stepping in for the Yanks. Biff?
1489
01:16:12,676 --> 01:16:16,304
Dixon's reputation as a tough
competitor is almost legendary, Vinnie.
1490
01:16:16,387 --> 01:16:18,514
Hey, Ken Dixon, man.
1491
01:16:18,597 --> 01:16:21,057
It's a pleasure to be on the
same field with you, Mr. Dixon.
1492
01:16:21,098 --> 01:16:23,100
I admire your work. You're a great hitter.
1493
01:16:23,141 --> 01:16:24,934
That pitcher of yours
thinks he's cute, don't he?
1494
01:16:25,017 --> 01:16:26,476
He sure does.
1495
01:16:27,018 --> 01:16:29,603
Hey, you had a great
season this year, Mr. Dixon.
1496
01:16:29,644 --> 01:16:31,062
I saw that game in Boston...
1497
01:16:31,103 --> 01:16:32,270
What, back in June, was it?
1498
01:16:32,311 --> 01:16:34,646
-DIXON: Saw that game?
-Yeah, I saw that game.
1499
01:16:35,730 --> 01:16:37,022
(EXCLAIMS)
1500
01:16:37,856 --> 01:16:40,775
Oh, I tell you. Great game. Two home runs.
1501
01:16:40,816 --> 01:16:42,567
A triple. Six RBIs.
1502
01:16:42,608 --> 01:16:44,776
I can't believe
you didn't make the all-star team.
1503
01:16:44,817 --> 01:16:46,193
I can't believe it either.
1504
01:16:51,448 --> 01:16:54,200
UMPIRE: Two! That was a foul ball.
1505
01:16:55,701 --> 01:16:57,911
Come on, Monty. Keep it in there.
Keep it in there.
1506
01:17:01,789 --> 01:17:04,416
Hey, Dixon, I saw your wife on television, too.
1507
01:17:04,457 --> 01:17:06,375
-Yeah?
-Yeah, she sure is an ugly bitch.
1508
01:17:06,458 --> 01:17:08,084
-Hey...
-Strike three, you're out!
1509
01:17:08,125 --> 01:17:09,960
(YELLING)
1510
01:17:10,710 --> 01:17:12,086
-You shut up!
-Get outta here!
1511
01:17:12,461 --> 01:17:13,462
I don't care!
1512
01:17:15,130 --> 01:17:16,464
Get outta here.
1513
01:17:16,547 --> 01:17:18,090
(CONTINUES YELLING)
1514
01:17:18,131 --> 01:17:19,173
Get outta here.
1515
01:17:19,256 --> 01:17:21,132
-You shut up.
-What did I say?
1516
01:17:21,632 --> 01:17:23,300
What happened, man? What did he say?
1517
01:17:23,341 --> 01:17:25,134
-He called my wife an ugly bitch.
-Oh, come on.
1518
01:17:25,175 --> 01:17:27,135
You're a total snack bar!
1519
01:17:27,218 --> 01:17:29,386
-I'm a snack bar? You're an asshole.
-Come back here.
1520
01:17:29,469 --> 01:17:31,137
It's a very heated exchange.
1521
01:17:31,178 --> 01:17:34,389
It looks like this game may have
some real spirit after all, Biff.
1522
01:17:38,643 --> 01:17:40,311
It's all right. All right, all right, come on.
1523
01:17:43,814 --> 01:17:45,357
One word out of you, fat boy,
1524
01:17:45,440 --> 01:17:47,024
and you eat your mask.
1525
01:17:47,208 --> 01:17:49,376
You ain't gonna
talk to me the way you did Dixon.
1526
01:17:49,417 --> 01:17:51,627
Hey, can I help it if a guy can't take a joke?
1527
01:17:51,710 --> 01:17:53,086
Besides, have you ever seen his wife?
1528
01:17:53,169 --> 01:17:54,420
Yeah. Ugly bitch!
1529
01:17:55,838 --> 01:17:58,257
VIN: There's a long drive to deep centerfield.
1530
01:17:59,049 --> 01:18:01,342
Back, back, way back.
1531
01:18:03,802 --> 01:18:04,928
Oh!
1532
01:18:05,637 --> 01:18:07,347
(COMMENTARY CONTINUES INDISTINCTLY)
1533
01:18:09,432 --> 01:18:11,851
But Mike Scharf,
with a brilliant leaping catch...
1534
01:18:14,520 --> 01:18:17,856
ANNOUNCER: (ON TV) Exclusively yours
on the Yankee Baseball Network.
1535
01:18:17,939 --> 01:18:18,940
(CLEARING THROAT)
1536
01:18:20,191 --> 01:18:21,233
Uh-huh?
1537
01:18:21,441 --> 01:18:24,110
Warren Cox. I believe you're expecting me.
1538
01:18:24,777 --> 01:18:27,196
Oh, yeah, right. The refund.
1539
01:18:27,279 --> 01:18:30,991
Yes. It's $20,000. That's the receipt.
1540
01:18:31,074 --> 01:18:32,450
Yeah, I'm glad to get rid of it.
1541
01:18:32,533 --> 01:18:33,867
Don't like having that kind
of money around here,
1542
01:18:33,950 --> 01:18:35,326
if you know what I mean.
1543
01:18:35,409 --> 01:18:37,327
Didn't make the boss too happy though.
1544
01:18:37,410 --> 01:18:38,411
He got all bent out of shape
1545
01:18:38,452 --> 01:18:40,495
when he found out Mr. Brewster
didn't like the furniture he got.
1546
01:18:40,578 --> 01:18:43,747
Oh, yes, it's a pity, but he has no taste.
1547
01:18:46,958 --> 01:18:48,918
Oh, by the way, how's the big game coming?
1548
01:18:49,126 --> 01:18:50,585
Bulls are ahead one-zip.
1549
01:18:50,626 --> 01:18:52,628
Top of the third,
but they're really starting to hit 'em.
1550
01:18:52,669 --> 01:18:53,836
Right.
1551
01:18:55,796 --> 01:18:58,048
No, no, no, no, no, no, no!
1552
01:18:58,131 --> 01:18:59,465
(CROWD CHEERING)
1553
01:18:59,631 --> 01:19:03,051
VIN: Scharf is walking
back, back, and way back.
1554
01:19:04,260 --> 01:19:05,844
(CROWD BOOING AND CHEERING)
1555
01:19:05,927 --> 01:19:10,306
Ken Dixon driving one out of here,
a grand-slam home run
1556
01:19:10,389 --> 01:19:13,225
and the Yankees lead it four to one.
1557
01:19:13,308 --> 01:19:16,144
Listen to that scattered applause
here in Hackensack.
1558
01:19:16,227 --> 01:19:18,270
Sounds more like a death knell.
1559
01:19:18,353 --> 01:19:20,063
(COMMENTARY CONTINUES INDISTINCTLY)
1560
01:19:27,361 --> 01:19:30,280
That is true Yankee baseball there, my friend.
1561
01:19:30,321 --> 01:19:33,365
And New York Yankee power has burst
1562
01:19:33,448 --> 01:19:35,783
a balloon over Hackensack, New Jersey.
1563
01:19:35,824 --> 01:19:38,827
Wouldn't you know that the Bronx
Bombers would be the bad guys?
1564
01:19:38,910 --> 01:19:40,119
Oh, my!
1565
01:19:46,667 --> 01:19:48,585
Gotta take you out, kid.
1566
01:19:52,755 --> 01:19:54,423
He just got lucky, that's all, Monty.
1567
01:19:57,175 --> 01:19:59,844
Hey, you did good, Brewster. Real good.
1568
01:19:59,927 --> 01:20:01,887
I'm proud of you and all the guys.
1569
01:20:01,970 --> 01:20:04,347
Hey, what the hell,
this is the New York Yankees!
1570
01:20:06,599 --> 01:20:08,559
(CROWD CHEERING)
1571
01:20:26,076 --> 01:20:27,869
UMPIRE: Play ball!
1572
01:20:48,306 --> 01:20:49,807
That was a valiant effort.
1573
01:20:50,432 --> 01:20:52,392
Your Uncle Rupert
would've been proud of you.
1574
01:20:54,143 --> 01:20:56,061
I thought my Uncle Rupert didn't like losers.
1575
01:20:56,686 --> 01:20:59,355
Mr. Brewster, I don't think you're a loser.
1576
01:21:00,105 --> 01:21:02,524
If it's the money you're worried about, don't.
1577
01:21:02,565 --> 01:21:04,608
I only have $38,000 left.
1578
01:21:04,691 --> 01:21:06,526
I could spend that tonight in my sleep.
1579
01:21:07,068 --> 01:21:10,112
Yes, but unfortunately
it looks like you could win this election.
1580
01:21:10,195 --> 01:21:13,323
The job carries a $60,000 annual salary
1581
01:21:13,406 --> 01:21:14,407
which I regret to say
1582
01:21:14,448 --> 01:21:17,868
would be considered an asset
by the terms of the will.
1583
01:21:20,245 --> 01:21:21,621
VIN: Okay, here are the final totals.
1584
01:21:21,704 --> 01:21:24,707
For the Yankees to win it,
four runs on four hits...
1585
01:21:24,748 --> 01:21:27,000
Wait a minute.
We might have somethin' goin' on here.
1586
01:21:27,083 --> 01:21:31,587
VIN: It looks like Brewster's
gonna address this crowd of folks.
1587
01:21:31,670 --> 01:21:34,589
Kill the commercial, fellas.
We're gonna stay right here.
1588
01:21:36,632 --> 01:21:39,301
I'd like to take my hat off to the Yankees.
1589
01:21:39,384 --> 01:21:41,094
(CROWD CHEERING)
1590
01:21:44,430 --> 01:21:46,807
Anybody can inherit millions of dollars
1591
01:21:47,933 --> 01:21:49,142
and buy hisself an election.
1592
01:21:50,977 --> 01:21:54,939
But it takes a real athlete
to be a professional baseball player.
1593
01:21:55,481 --> 01:21:57,983
And that's what all these
gentlemen here are today.
1594
01:21:58,066 --> 01:21:59,859
Real professionals.
1595
01:21:59,942 --> 01:22:01,276
(ALL APPLAUDING)
1596
01:22:07,365 --> 01:22:10,326
See, the election was supposed to be a joke.
1597
01:22:10,409 --> 01:22:12,702
I didn't expect anybody to vote for me.
1598
01:22:13,119 --> 01:22:14,829
I didn't think anybody would take me serious.
1599
01:22:14,912 --> 01:22:17,998
I thought "None of the above"
was a pretty good idea.
1600
01:22:18,540 --> 01:22:20,583
I don't wanna be mayor. I never did.
1601
01:22:20,666 --> 01:22:22,459
(SHOUTS OF PROTEST)
1602
01:22:25,336 --> 01:22:26,795
How about that, Biff?
1603
01:22:26,836 --> 01:22:29,380
Monty Brewster
is withdrawing from the election.
1604
01:22:31,173 --> 01:22:33,717
It's not all downhill. I mean, I still got...
1605
01:22:35,135 --> 01:22:36,678
$38,000 left.
1606
01:22:37,804 --> 01:22:41,390
I'm gonna throw a party tonight
back at the hotel in New York
1607
01:22:41,473 --> 01:22:42,891
and you're all invited.
1608
01:22:42,974 --> 01:22:44,433
(CROWD APPLAUDING)
1609
01:23:25,182 --> 01:23:26,224
Hi.
1610
01:23:29,185 --> 01:23:30,436
I thought I'd find you here.
1611
01:23:31,353 --> 01:23:33,021
Listen, since Warren's not around,
1612
01:23:33,062 --> 01:23:36,190
I thought maybe I could
escort you to the party.
1613
01:23:37,107 --> 01:23:39,734
Monty, I'm real sorry
about you retiring from baseball.
1614
01:23:39,817 --> 01:23:41,193
I know how much it meant to you.
1615
01:23:41,234 --> 01:23:44,570
That's all right. I mean, it happens
to everyone sooner or later.
1616
01:23:44,653 --> 01:23:46,029
It's the nature of the game.
1617
01:23:46,612 --> 01:23:47,696
Yeah.
1618
01:23:49,322 --> 01:23:50,990
(SIGHING) Well, I don't think there's anything
1619
01:23:51,031 --> 01:23:52,407
left here for me to add up,
1620
01:23:52,490 --> 01:23:53,908
so I guess this is goodbye.
1621
01:23:54,116 --> 01:23:56,284
Goodbye? Don't you wanna go to the party?
1622
01:23:56,701 --> 01:23:59,495
Oh, no. I couldn't stand another one.
1623
01:23:59,870 --> 01:24:00,871
If you wanna know the truth,
1624
01:24:00,954 --> 01:24:03,081
I don't see what
you could possibly be celebrating
1625
01:24:03,164 --> 01:24:06,250
unless you think it's okay
to squander $30 million.
1626
01:24:06,333 --> 01:24:09,586
I don't. I just think maybe it was
a phase I was going through.
1627
01:24:11,462 --> 01:24:12,921
Listen, tomorrow things will be different.
1628
01:24:13,004 --> 01:24:14,380
I won't be like this anymore.
1629
01:24:14,421 --> 01:24:18,007
Come tomorrow, you are dead broke.
It's all over.
1630
01:24:18,632 --> 01:24:21,051
You don't even have a job
playing baseball anymore,
1631
01:24:21,092 --> 01:24:22,468
and what do you do?
1632
01:24:22,551 --> 01:24:25,387
You throw a party with your last 38,000!
1633
01:24:25,470 --> 01:24:27,346
Listen to me, I pissed off so much money,
1634
01:24:27,387 --> 01:24:30,264
I figured, "What difference
does $38,000 make?"
1635
01:24:30,347 --> 01:24:31,806
Oh, how dare you?
1636
01:24:32,348 --> 01:24:35,893
That's more money than a lot of
hardworking people earn in a year.
1637
01:24:35,976 --> 01:24:38,186
You better get your values together
'cause you're gonna need 'em.
1638
01:24:38,227 --> 01:24:39,829
Why don't wait until tomorrow,
1639
01:24:39,870 --> 01:24:41,329
and then you'll know what this is all about.
1640
01:24:41,412 --> 01:24:42,538
Just forget it, okay?
1641
01:24:42,621 --> 01:24:43,913
And I hope you have fun at that party,
1642
01:24:43,996 --> 01:24:45,664
'cause that's all you got left.
1643
01:24:52,671 --> 01:24:54,005
I love you.
1644
01:24:57,675 --> 01:24:59,927
(BAND PLAYING JAZZ)
1645
01:25:19,571 --> 01:25:23,700
Mr. Donaldo, we're accepting
contributions for Mr. Brewster
1646
01:25:23,783 --> 01:25:25,618
since he's currently insolvent.
1647
01:25:25,701 --> 01:25:27,994
Yeah, Donaldo, Put some money in here now.
1648
01:25:28,035 --> 01:25:29,703
I didn't bring my wallet, guys.
1649
01:25:29,744 --> 01:25:31,036
I thought this was a free party.
1650
01:25:31,077 --> 01:25:32,411
I see. Too bad.
1651
01:25:32,494 --> 01:25:33,995
What do you do with your money,
put it in tin cans?
1652
01:25:34,036 --> 01:25:37,873
You got it, big boy.
This gravy train ain't gonna run forever.
1653
01:25:38,623 --> 01:25:40,708
Oh, what's this?
1654
01:25:41,917 --> 01:25:46,046
Well, thank you very much.
This is generous of you. Very generous.
1655
01:25:46,087 --> 01:25:48,631
I'm gonna put you on my Christmas card list.
1656
01:25:51,216 --> 01:25:53,426
How about a glass
of champagne, Mr. Brewster?
1657
01:25:53,509 --> 01:25:54,885
How about a bottle of champagne?
1658
01:25:54,926 --> 01:25:55,927
As you wish.
1659
01:25:56,010 --> 01:25:57,011
I'm gonna get drunk.
1660
01:25:57,052 --> 01:25:58,386
SPIKE: Monty!
1661
01:25:58,928 --> 01:26:01,472
Monty, good news, pal. Good news.
1662
01:26:01,555 --> 01:26:03,390
Mr. Brewster, I want you to know
1663
01:26:03,431 --> 01:26:04,640
I think you're a hell of a nice man,
1664
01:26:04,723 --> 01:26:06,558
and we took up a collection for you.
1665
01:26:06,641 --> 01:26:08,392
I mean, you've paid us all so much money,
1666
01:26:08,475 --> 01:26:09,976
we feel bad now that you're broke,
1667
01:26:10,059 --> 01:26:12,186
so would you take this money, please?
1668
01:26:13,061 --> 01:26:14,687
I really appreciate this, you know,
1669
01:26:14,728 --> 01:26:15,895
but you know me.
1670
01:26:15,978 --> 01:26:18,397
I'll just spend it. I can't take it.
1671
01:26:18,772 --> 01:26:20,356
Brother, would you take the money, please?
1672
01:26:20,397 --> 01:26:21,773
-I can't.
-Take the money.
1673
01:26:21,856 --> 01:26:22,898
No.
1674
01:26:24,316 --> 01:26:25,984
I know. You don't want charity.
1675
01:26:26,067 --> 01:26:28,277
Forget the charity. Forget that.
1676
01:26:28,360 --> 01:26:30,236
I was gonna save this for a rainy day.
1677
01:26:30,277 --> 01:26:32,153
I'll tell ya now, I'll tell ya now, it's raining.
1678
01:26:32,403 --> 01:26:34,822
Look, with the exception
of a few nice suits that I bought,
1679
01:26:34,905 --> 01:26:36,489
I saved almost every penny you gave me.
1680
01:26:36,655 --> 01:26:38,657
Now, I got an idea.
And here's what we're gonna do.
1681
01:26:38,740 --> 01:26:39,782
We're gonna buy a Corvette,
1682
01:26:39,865 --> 01:26:40,907
we're gonna drive across country,
1683
01:26:40,990 --> 01:26:42,741
go to say, the Rocky Mountains.
1684
01:26:42,824 --> 01:26:44,575
We'll buy a cabin there,
we'll go fishing every day,
1685
01:26:44,658 --> 01:26:45,784
we'll fly in women every other day.
1686
01:26:45,867 --> 01:26:49,620
Spike, you're beautiful, man. You... You are.
1687
01:26:49,703 --> 01:26:51,621
But you don't know. See, tomorrow...
1688
01:26:52,121 --> 01:26:53,288
Yeah?
1689
01:26:53,871 --> 01:26:55,247
Almost let the cat out of the bag.
1690
01:26:55,580 --> 01:26:57,790
I almost let the cat
out of the bag, Uncle Rupert.
1691
01:26:58,123 --> 01:26:59,541
SPIKE: (CHUCKLING)
What are you talkin' about?
1692
01:27:00,208 --> 01:27:01,792
See, I can't tell my closest friend,
1693
01:27:01,875 --> 01:27:04,377
'cause my Uncle Rupert's a son of a bitch.
1694
01:27:04,418 --> 01:27:06,336
Why? What are you saying?
1695
01:27:06,753 --> 01:27:07,795
Uh...
1696
01:27:07,878 --> 01:27:09,546
Hey, it's supposed to be a party.
1697
01:27:10,171 --> 01:27:11,213
It's a party!
1698
01:27:11,254 --> 01:27:13,673
How come everybody
ain't dancing and having a good time?
1699
01:27:14,256 --> 01:27:15,590
I mean, what? Somebody die?
1700
01:27:16,173 --> 01:27:17,924
I gotta get full value for my money.
1701
01:27:18,424 --> 01:27:21,635
Hey, you heard him.
He said he doesn't want it.
1702
01:27:22,260 --> 01:27:23,552
Did you really spend all that money?
1703
01:27:26,721 --> 01:27:28,639
(BOTH LAUGHING)
1704
01:27:32,267 --> 01:27:33,851
Nice friend I turned out to be.
1705
01:27:33,934 --> 01:27:35,477
You give me all that money for what?
1706
01:27:35,560 --> 01:27:36,852
So I could play catch with you?
1707
01:27:36,935 --> 01:27:39,103
Spike, you don't understand.
1708
01:27:39,937 --> 01:27:41,688
Nobody understands.
1709
01:27:42,647 --> 01:27:44,940
I don't even understand anymore.
1710
01:27:45,023 --> 01:27:46,524
And I am sick of money.
1711
01:27:47,149 --> 01:27:50,485
I'm gonna take this
and I'm gonna get tore up.
1712
01:28:03,748 --> 01:28:07,209
Give me a few bottles
of what he's drinking, all right?
1713
01:28:07,959 --> 01:28:10,419
(PLAYING AULD LANG SYNE)
1714
01:28:35,318 --> 01:28:36,819
(CLATTERING)
1715
01:28:57,130 --> 01:28:59,006
It's after 3:00, Mr. Brewster.
1716
01:29:01,633 --> 01:29:02,675
Checkout time?
1717
01:29:03,008 --> 01:29:04,009
(SCOFFS)
1718
01:29:04,551 --> 01:29:06,386
I'm afraid you'll have to leave now.
1719
01:29:07,887 --> 01:29:10,014
Like I always said, Mr. Carter.
1720
01:29:10,097 --> 01:29:11,848
You're a real nice man.
1721
01:29:14,809 --> 01:29:18,687
I believe everything you're wearing
belongs to us, Mr. Brewster.
1722
01:29:20,563 --> 01:29:21,772
I almost forgot.
1723
01:29:26,860 --> 01:29:30,238
Just the clothes on my back.
That's what they said.
1724
01:29:30,321 --> 01:29:34,408
Piss off $30 million.
Makes a lot of sense, Uncle Rupert.
1725
01:29:34,908 --> 01:29:36,326
You asshole.
1726
01:29:39,370 --> 01:29:41,872
I'm gonna recommend
your shop to all my friends.
1727
01:29:42,247 --> 01:29:43,790
You lease some great clothes.
1728
01:29:44,665 --> 01:29:46,041
All of 'em.
1729
01:29:47,000 --> 01:29:48,001
Keep this, too.
1730
01:30:50,104 --> 01:30:51,146
Monty?
1731
01:30:51,938 --> 01:30:54,774
Well, hello. I hardly recognized you.
1732
01:30:56,066 --> 01:30:58,610
It's ready, sir. What do you think?
1733
01:30:59,944 --> 01:31:01,487
Do you like it?
1734
01:31:02,362 --> 01:31:05,114
Marilyn, this is the room I could die in.
1735
01:31:05,506 --> 01:31:07,007
Oh, thank God.
1736
01:31:07,048 --> 01:31:09,008
(SOBBING) I'm so glad.
1737
01:31:11,802 --> 01:31:13,178
Okay, boys.
1738
01:31:14,387 --> 01:31:16,055
Take it all back.
1739
01:31:28,734 --> 01:31:31,069
I wish you had the dough to keep it, Monty.
1740
01:31:47,210 --> 01:31:48,628
Taxicab, Mr. Brewster?
1741
01:31:48,711 --> 01:31:50,295
(SCOFFS) George, I can't afford it now.
1742
01:31:50,378 --> 01:31:52,046
I'm outta money.
1743
01:31:53,672 --> 01:31:56,257
You'll never guess
who I voted for this morning.
1744
01:31:56,298 --> 01:31:58,091
None of the above.
1745
01:31:58,925 --> 01:32:00,343
That's good.
1746
01:32:02,094 --> 01:32:03,762
That's real good.
1747
01:32:18,943 --> 01:32:21,153
This is Chuck Fleming in Times Square.
1748
01:32:21,236 --> 01:32:22,946
Well, that newsflash tells it all.
1749
01:32:23,196 --> 01:32:24,655
To add to the confusion of today's events,
1750
01:32:24,738 --> 01:32:26,614
former candidate Montgomery Brewster
1751
01:32:26,655 --> 01:32:28,657
who withdrew from
the campaign only yesterday,
1752
01:32:28,740 --> 01:32:30,658
and apparently now dead broke,
1753
01:32:30,741 --> 01:32:32,951
checked out of
his luxury hotel a few hours ago
1754
01:32:33,034 --> 01:32:34,952
wearing the same baseball jersey and cap
1755
01:32:34,993 --> 01:32:36,285
he had on 30 days ago.
1756
01:32:36,535 --> 01:32:38,662
Where is he now? Nobody seems to know.
1757
01:32:39,120 --> 01:32:41,789
We followed his rollercoaster
ride of success and failure
1758
01:32:41,830 --> 01:32:45,041
for the last 30 days,
and now it would seem to be over.
1759
01:32:45,124 --> 01:32:48,794
But those of you following
the election results know that that's not so.
1760
01:32:48,835 --> 01:32:50,378
Well, if you're out there, Monty,
1761
01:32:50,461 --> 01:32:53,464
turn on a radio or a TV set
or pick up a newspaper.
1762
01:32:53,505 --> 01:32:56,966
I think you might be proud
of what's happened in this city today.
1763
01:32:57,091 --> 01:32:58,842
Chuck Fleming, Action News.
1764
01:33:14,315 --> 01:33:15,566
(DINGS)
1765
01:33:16,483 --> 01:33:19,486
Oh, Monty. Just the man I wanted to see.
1766
01:33:20,570 --> 01:33:22,154
I've got wonderful news for you, Monty.
1767
01:33:22,279 --> 01:33:24,197
-I'm not in the mood
-No, wonderful, wonderful news.
1768
01:33:24,280 --> 01:33:25,322
-Do you remember...
-No, I'm not in the mood.
1769
01:33:25,363 --> 01:33:27,031
Do you remember the $20,000
1770
01:33:27,114 --> 01:33:28,990
that you gave me
as a deposit on the furniture?
1771
01:33:29,031 --> 01:33:32,659
Well, here it is. You're not broke after all.
1772
01:33:32,742 --> 01:33:34,535
Isn't that fortunate?
1773
01:33:35,702 --> 01:33:36,703
ROUNDFIELD: Three minutes.
1774
01:33:36,786 --> 01:33:38,704
GRANVILLE: I'm sorry to say this, Roundfield,
1775
01:33:38,787 --> 01:33:41,539
but our records indicate Brewster still has
1776
01:33:41,622 --> 01:33:44,124
a substantial amount of money.
1777
01:33:44,165 --> 01:33:45,583
-Really?
-Mmm-hmm.
1778
01:33:50,796 --> 01:33:52,130
(YELLS)
1779
01:33:52,171 --> 01:33:54,298
I can't believe it! I quit!
1780
01:34:10,480 --> 01:34:13,983
I guess I didn't do so good.
I still got $20,000 left.
1781
01:34:15,067 --> 01:34:18,528
Look, I know I lost and everything,
1782
01:34:19,028 --> 01:34:21,530
so I'll sign what you want me to sign
and I'll get out of here.
1783
01:34:21,571 --> 01:34:23,322
Give him the quitclaim papers.
1784
01:34:23,363 --> 01:34:24,530
Use my pen.
1785
01:34:26,281 --> 01:34:29,284
Mr. Brewster, you still have two full minutes.
1786
01:34:29,367 --> 01:34:30,576
Two full minutes for what?
1787
01:34:30,659 --> 01:34:32,619
I blew it. I'm burned out.
1788
01:34:33,578 --> 01:34:35,746
(INDISTINCT)
1789
01:34:39,374 --> 01:34:40,416
Warren, what are you doing?
1790
01:34:40,499 --> 01:34:43,084
(SHUSHING) He's about to sign it all away.
1791
01:34:43,209 --> 01:34:44,418
What are you doing here?
1792
01:34:44,501 --> 01:34:46,211
I'm working late.
Closing out Brewster's account.
1793
01:34:46,294 --> 01:34:47,878
-Sign what away?
-(SHUSHING)
1794
01:34:49,129 --> 01:34:50,797
I guess I can let you in on it now.
1795
01:34:50,880 --> 01:34:52,840
In a few seconds I'm gonna be a full partner,
1796
01:34:52,881 --> 01:34:54,883
just as soon as he signs that paper.
1797
01:34:54,924 --> 01:34:57,760
See, the reason that he blew the $30 million
1798
01:34:57,843 --> 01:35:00,929
was so he could get
his real inheritance of $300 million.
1799
01:35:01,012 --> 01:35:02,805
You mean, he had to spend all that money?
1800
01:35:02,971 --> 01:35:04,222
Why didn't he tell me?
1801
01:35:04,263 --> 01:35:05,597
It was a condition of his great-uncle's will.
1802
01:35:05,680 --> 01:35:07,765
He had to keep it a secret.
1803
01:35:07,848 --> 01:35:09,057
Well, if it's such a big secret,
1804
01:35:09,140 --> 01:35:11,350
how come you know all about it?
1805
01:35:11,391 --> 01:35:13,601
I'm afraid that too is a secret.
1806
01:35:13,684 --> 01:35:16,061
Uh-uh. He did spend that money.
I have all the receipts.
1807
01:35:16,561 --> 01:35:18,604
Maybe you're not as thorough
as you think you are.
1808
01:35:18,687 --> 01:35:20,772
Remember the Dawson and Clark account?
1809
01:35:20,855 --> 01:35:22,565
Fine custom furniture and draperies?
1810
01:35:24,483 --> 01:35:26,151
No! Give me that!
1811
01:35:26,568 --> 01:35:28,236
Monty, stop! Don't sign anything!
1812
01:35:28,277 --> 01:35:30,153
Miss Drake! This is a private meeting.
1813
01:35:30,236 --> 01:35:31,779
Leave or you'll be fired.
1814
01:35:31,862 --> 01:35:32,863
Sign right here, son.
1815
01:35:32,904 --> 01:35:34,864
Warren cheated him.
And these two put him up to it.
1816
01:35:34,905 --> 01:35:37,407
He purposely withheld the $20,000 deposit
1817
01:35:37,448 --> 01:35:39,032
so that Monty would think
he'd already spent it.
1818
01:35:39,073 --> 01:35:40,783
I forgot to give her the receipt, that's all.
1819
01:35:40,866 --> 01:35:42,158
It was a perfectly honest mistake.
1820
01:35:42,241 --> 01:35:44,993
Gentlemen,
is there any truth to this accusation?
1821
01:35:45,451 --> 01:35:48,078
Totally preposterous.
We're completely innocent.
1822
01:35:48,161 --> 01:35:49,579
You are fired, Miss Drake.
1823
01:35:49,745 --> 01:35:50,746
Ooh.
1824
01:35:53,582 --> 01:35:55,959
My lucky day, huh, Warren?
1825
01:35:56,042 --> 01:35:57,918
You're my pal, right?
1826
01:35:58,335 --> 01:36:00,920
You're a liar, Warren. You tricked me!
Set me up!
1827
01:36:01,003 --> 01:36:02,963
No, no, not at all.
That was just a coincidence.
1828
01:36:03,046 --> 01:36:04,547
Hey, you're a terrible liar, Warren,
1829
01:36:04,588 --> 01:36:05,714
and an awful decorator.
1830
01:36:06,131 --> 01:36:08,091
Well, it's better than
being a couple of rabbits.
1831
01:36:08,132 --> 01:36:09,508
What are you insinuating?
1832
01:36:09,591 --> 01:36:10,925
You're a big girl. You figure it out.
1833
01:36:11,800 --> 01:36:14,511
Hold it, hold it, hold it, sister. Take it easy.
1834
01:36:14,594 --> 01:36:16,679
You're a lady. I want you to remain a lady.
1835
01:36:16,762 --> 01:36:18,597
Oh, that's excellent advice, Mr. Brewster,
1836
01:36:18,638 --> 01:36:20,389
but a little late, don't you think?
1837
01:36:21,681 --> 01:36:22,682
Oh!
1838
01:36:25,434 --> 01:36:27,703
I'm glad you did that, Brewster, because...
1839
01:36:27,744 --> 01:36:29,704
Because I'm gonna sue you
for so much money
1840
01:36:29,745 --> 01:36:31,747
that you're gonna be
in debt to me for the rest of your life.
1841
01:36:31,830 --> 01:36:32,956
How would you like to settle out of court
1842
01:36:33,039 --> 01:36:34,749
right now for $20,000 in cash?
1843
01:36:35,040 --> 01:36:37,876
Oh, you think
I came down with the last drop of rain?
1844
01:36:37,917 --> 01:36:40,544
I'm not falling for that trick. Uh-uh.
No settlements.
1845
01:36:40,585 --> 01:36:42,044
I'm gonna take you to court, Brewster.
1846
01:36:42,127 --> 01:36:43,711
What are you gonna do about that?
1847
01:36:43,752 --> 01:36:44,794
(CLOCK CHIMES)
1848
01:36:44,877 --> 01:36:48,255
When that clock strikes 12:00,
you are dead broke for life.
1849
01:36:48,338 --> 01:36:50,882
You're a loser, Brewster. A real loser.
1850
01:36:51,966 --> 01:36:53,175
I'm gonna need an attorney, Miss Drake.
1851
01:36:53,216 --> 01:36:55,051
Will $20,000 be enough of a retainer?
1852
01:36:55,092 --> 01:36:57,052
But I'm just a paralegal. I don't have a degree.
1853
01:36:57,093 --> 01:36:58,594
You can get a degree with $20,000.
1854
01:36:58,677 --> 01:36:59,719
It's just an advance.
1855
01:36:59,760 --> 01:37:00,844
You need a receipt!
1856
01:37:00,927 --> 01:37:02,762
(CLOCK BEGINS STRIKING 12:00)
1857
01:37:02,845 --> 01:37:04,888
I'll give you a receipt.
1858
01:37:06,222 --> 01:37:08,682
Please! Hurry, please.
1859
01:37:17,357 --> 01:37:18,941
(STRIKING ENDS)
1860
01:37:20,609 --> 01:37:23,737
As the executor of
your great-uncle's will, I hereby declare
1861
01:37:23,778 --> 01:37:28,491
that the full inheritance
of $300 million is yours.
1862
01:37:28,574 --> 01:37:30,492
-Wow!
-Congratulations.
1863
01:37:30,575 --> 01:37:31,909
(LAUGHING)
1864
01:37:31,950 --> 01:37:34,786
Gentlemen,
I sense conspiracy to defraud here.
1865
01:37:34,869 --> 01:37:37,329
I'm afraid that I'm gonna have
to order a full investigation,
1866
01:37:37,412 --> 01:37:39,330
with your consent, Mr. Brewster.
1867
01:37:39,413 --> 01:37:42,249
Well... Send 'em to the showers.
1868
01:37:42,666 --> 01:37:44,376
It'll take about 20 years to dry off
where you're goin'.
1869
01:37:44,417 --> 01:37:46,377
(LAUGHS) Better take a big towel.
1870
01:37:46,418 --> 01:37:48,670
Mr. Roundfield, you're a real nice man.
1871
01:37:49,087 --> 01:37:51,422
Thank you very much. You're a real nice man.
1872
01:37:51,505 --> 01:37:55,258
Uh, Warren, better learn the blues.
You know...
1873
01:37:55,841 --> 01:37:57,509
(SINGING) Hey, baby, I'm sorry I did it
1874
01:37:57,592 --> 01:37:58,593
(LAUGHS)
1875
01:37:58,676 --> 01:38:00,636
I didn't mean to do it
1876
01:38:00,719 --> 01:38:02,095
We lost the money...
1877
01:38:02,178 --> 01:38:03,762
(LIVELY SONG PLAYING)
1878
01:38:07,766 --> 01:38:10,602
I've been looking everywhere
1879
01:38:11,436 --> 01:38:14,313
To find someone who's right
1880
01:38:14,938 --> 01:38:17,982
Sugar man, just to talk to me
1881
01:38:18,732 --> 01:38:21,776
Why don't you take me home tonight
1882
01:38:22,359 --> 01:38:25,362
You were out there all this time
1883
01:38:26,029 --> 01:38:29,323
All the time could have been this time
1884
01:38:29,406 --> 01:38:32,909
How could I ever have been so blind
1885
01:38:32,950 --> 01:38:36,286
I got to you in the nick of time
1886
01:38:38,621 --> 01:38:44,627
Situations call for drastic measures
1887
01:38:45,878 --> 01:38:49,006
Looked like I was going for good
1888
01:38:49,089 --> 01:38:52,675
Till I can start up a neighborhood
1889
01:38:52,758 --> 01:38:58,305
I must admit it took my very best line
1890
01:39:00,348 --> 01:39:03,768
Got to you in the nick of time
1891
01:39:03,809 --> 01:39:06,770
Got to you in the nick of time
1892
01:39:06,811 --> 01:39:10,105
I got to you in the nick of time
1893
01:39:11,147 --> 01:39:13,315
Got to you in the
1894
01:39:13,356 --> 01:39:16,150
Oh, you saved me
1895
01:39:16,233 --> 01:39:19,402
Yeah, you saved me
1896
01:39:19,819 --> 01:39:23,489
In a bad situation
1897
01:39:24,072 --> 01:39:26,324
You came along
1898
01:39:28,367 --> 01:39:29,826
Saved me
1899
01:39:29,909 --> 01:39:31,577
Somebody saved me
1900
01:39:31,660 --> 01:39:32,702
You saved me
1901
01:39:32,785 --> 01:39:34,328
Somebody saved me
1902
01:39:34,369 --> 01:39:37,246
I got to you
1903
01:39:49,758 --> 01:39:53,011
Got to you in the nick of time
1904
01:39:53,094 --> 01:39:55,012
I did
1905
01:40:03,520 --> 01:40:05,605
Yeah, got to you
1906
01:40:07,356 --> 01:40:10,859
Yeah, got to you in the nick of time
1907
01:40:11,818 --> 01:40:14,570
Got to you in the nick of time
1908
01:40:15,404 --> 01:40:18,198
Got to you in the nick of time
1909
01:40:36,132 --> 01:40:40,678
Got to you in the nick of time
1910
01:40:50,521 --> 01:40:52,397
Somebody saved me
1911
01:40:52,438 --> 01:40:54,064
In the nick of time
1912
01:40:54,147 --> 01:40:55,773
Somebody saved me
1913
01:40:55,856 --> 01:40:57,399
In the nick of time
1914
01:40:57,482 --> 01:40:59,108
Somebody saved me
1915
01:40:59,191 --> 01:41:00,692
In the nick of time
1916
01:41:01,609 --> 01:41:04,445
Got to you in the nick of time