1 00:00:08,608 --> 00:00:13,313 ^^ It'’’s the most wonderful time of the year ^^ 2 00:00:15,115 --> 00:00:19,019 ^^ With the kids jingle belling And everyone telling you ^^ 3 00:00:19,019 --> 00:00:21,488 ^^ Be of good cheer ^^ 4 00:00:21,488 --> 00:00:26,659 ^^ It'’’s the most wonderful time of the year ^^ 5 00:00:27,994 --> 00:00:34,567 ^^ It'’’s the hap-happiest season of all ^^ 6 00:00:34,567 --> 00:00:37,937 ^^ With those holiday greetings and gay happy meetings ^^ 7 00:00:37,937 --> 00:00:41,074 ^^ When friends come to call ^^ 8 00:00:41,074 --> 00:00:47,480 ^^ It'’’s the hap-happiest season of all ^^ 9 00:00:47,480 --> 00:00:49,416 ^^ There'’’ll be parties for hosting ^^ 10 00:00:49,416 --> 00:00:51,117 ^^ Marshmallows for toasting ^^ 11 00:00:51,117 --> 00:00:54,020 ^^ And caroling out in the snow ^^ 12 00:00:54,020 --> 00:00:56,289 ^^ There'’’ll be scary ghost stories ^^ 13 00:00:56,289 --> 00:01:01,828 ^^ And tales of the glories of Christmases long, long ago ^^ 14 00:01:01,828 --> 00:01:07,600 ^^ It'’’s the most wonderful time of the year ^^ 15 00:01:07,600 --> 00:01:10,704 ^^ There'’’ll be much mistletoeing ^^ 16 00:01:10,704 --> 00:01:15,008 ^^ And hearts will be glowing when loved ones are near ^^ 17 00:01:15,008 --> 00:01:21,014 ^^ It'’’s the most wonderful time of the year ^^ 18 00:01:26,786 --> 00:01:28,154 [screams] 19 00:01:28,154 --> 00:01:29,956 ^^ There'’’ll be parties for hosting ^^ 20 00:01:29,956 --> 00:01:31,624 ^^ Marshmallows for toasting ^^ 21 00:01:31,624 --> 00:01:34,527 ^^ And caroling out in the snow ^^ 22 00:01:34,527 --> 00:01:36,429 ^^ There'’’ll be scary ghost stories ^^ 23 00:01:36,429 --> 00:01:41,468 ^^ And tales of the glories of Christmases long, long ago ^^ 24 00:01:41,468 --> 00:01:45,805 ^^ Oh, oh, oh ^^ 25 00:01:45,805 --> 00:01:51,478 ^^ It'’’s the most wonderful time of the year ^^ 26 00:01:51,478 --> 00:01:55,548 ^^ There'’’ll be much mistltoeing and hearts will be glowing ^^ 27 00:01:55,548 --> 00:01:57,684 ^^ When loved ones are near ^^ 28 00:01:57,684 --> 00:02:00,487 ^^ Yes, the most wonderful time ^^ 29 00:02:00,487 --> 00:02:04,991 ^^ Oh, the most wonderful time ^^ 30 00:02:04,991 --> 00:02:10,997 ^^ Of the year ^^^^ 31 00:02:10,997 --> 00:02:14,034 My firm'’’s done a tremendous amount of market research. 32 00:02:14,034 --> 00:02:15,602 We'’’ve discovered two things: 33 00:02:18,271 --> 00:02:20,306 is a time for family. 34 00:02:20,306 --> 00:02:22,676 Two, most Americans feel that 35 00:02:22,676 --> 00:02:24,811 in order to stand being around their family, 36 00:02:24,811 --> 00:02:26,146 for even one or two days, 37 00:02:26,146 --> 00:02:29,849 they need to swill as much alcohol as humanly possible. 38 00:02:29,849 --> 00:02:33,720 Now, I'’’d like you to meet the Noggertons. 39 00:02:33,720 --> 00:02:35,655 They'’’re a classic American family. 40 00:02:35,655 --> 00:02:37,424 They'’’re together on Christmas, 41 00:02:37,424 --> 00:02:38,558 they'’’re fat-free, 42 00:02:38,558 --> 00:02:40,226 and 10 percent alcohol by volume. 43 00:02:40,226 --> 00:02:41,828 Enjoy our family, 44 00:02:41,828 --> 00:02:44,698 so you can enjoy your family. 45 00:02:44,698 --> 00:02:46,166 What do you think? 46 00:02:46,166 --> 00:02:47,901 So you'’’re suggesting we tell people 47 00:02:47,901 --> 00:02:50,470 that the only way to get through the holidays 48 00:02:50,470 --> 00:02:52,972 is to drink spiked egg nog? 49 00:02:52,972 --> 00:02:55,475 I'’’m suggesting the only way to get through the holidays 50 00:02:55,475 --> 00:02:57,410 is to buy your farm-fresh, fat-free, 51 00:02:57,410 --> 00:02:59,212 pre-spiked egg nog in a bottle. 52 00:03:01,614 --> 00:03:04,818 - Take care. All right. - Terrific. It'’’s all good. 53 00:03:04,818 --> 00:03:06,419 - How do you do it? - I'’’m very excited. 54 00:03:06,419 --> 00:03:08,388 I look forward to it. 55 00:03:08,388 --> 00:03:10,090 It went pretty well, huh? 56 00:03:10,090 --> 00:03:11,491 I'’’m a genius. 57 00:03:11,491 --> 00:03:14,194 I feel like I could sell whale steaks to Greenpeace. 58 00:03:14,194 --> 00:03:15,628 Nice image. 59 00:03:15,628 --> 00:03:18,698 - Here are your tickets to Fiji. - Ah. 60 00:03:27,707 --> 00:03:29,809 [Drew] Missy, we'’’ve been dating for a while. 61 00:03:29,809 --> 00:03:32,112 We should take our relationship to the next level. 62 00:03:32,112 --> 00:03:34,180 [Missy] I'’’ve been hoping you would say that 63 00:03:34,180 --> 00:03:36,916 [Drew] So I got you a little pre-Christmas Christmas gift. 64 00:03:36,916 --> 00:03:38,685 [Missy] Yeah? 65 00:03:38,685 --> 00:03:41,521 I want you to open it now 66 00:03:41,521 --> 00:03:43,790 because it involves our future. 67 00:03:43,790 --> 00:03:47,060 The future of you and me together. 68 00:03:47,060 --> 00:03:50,764 It'’’s kind of for both of us, in that way. 69 00:03:52,465 --> 00:03:55,568 [breathless] Okay. 70 00:04:03,543 --> 00:04:04,811 Tickets to Fiji? 71 00:04:04,811 --> 00:04:07,313 Yes. First class. 72 00:04:07,313 --> 00:04:08,982 Drew, on Christmas? 73 00:04:08,982 --> 00:04:11,718 Christmas is the family holiday. 74 00:04:11,718 --> 00:04:13,720 I mean, what are we doing? What is this? 75 00:04:13,720 --> 00:04:15,722 I mean, what is going on? 76 00:04:15,722 --> 00:04:18,191 Where is this relationship headed? 77 00:04:19,192 --> 00:04:21,961 Fiji. First class. 78 00:04:21,961 --> 00:04:25,832 - Missy? - Uh-uh. Okay. 79 00:04:25,832 --> 00:04:27,934 Here'’’s an example of one of our problems. 80 00:04:27,934 --> 00:04:29,936 You'’’ve never introduced me to your family. 81 00:04:29,936 --> 00:04:33,340 You'’’ve never even mentioned your family. Do you even have a family? 82 00:04:33,340 --> 00:04:35,875 How can you be serious about me, 83 00:04:35,875 --> 00:04:37,944 if you'’’re not serious about your own family? 84 00:04:37,944 --> 00:04:40,613 You need to get some serious help, Drew. 85 00:04:40,613 --> 00:04:42,549 I think you'’’re missing the point. 86 00:04:42,549 --> 00:04:44,584 See, if I told you everything about me, 87 00:04:44,584 --> 00:04:46,419 there'’’d be no more sense of mystery. 88 00:04:46,419 --> 00:04:47,954 Nothing left to discover. 89 00:04:47,954 --> 00:04:50,757 When there'’’s nothing left to discover, a relationship dies. 90 00:04:50,757 --> 00:04:53,159 You don'’’t want this relationship to die, do you? 91 00:04:53,159 --> 00:04:55,628 It just did. 92 00:04:57,697 --> 00:05:00,500 Come on. Don'’’t be like that. 93 00:05:00,500 --> 00:05:02,902 All right, you'’’re gonna be like that? Go ahead. Go. 94 00:05:02,902 --> 00:05:05,405 I'’’m going to snd Christmas with my family. 95 00:05:05,405 --> 00:05:07,440 You can spend Christmas alone. 96 00:05:11,011 --> 00:05:13,279 - [Drew] Missy. - [door slams] 97 00:05:21,287 --> 00:05:23,690 [sighs] 98 00:05:31,865 --> 00:05:34,300 Kathryn, I need you 99 00:05:34,300 --> 00:05:37,270 to get a Cartier bracelet to send to Missy. 100 00:05:37,270 --> 00:05:40,440 Something very expensive, a lot of diamonds, very flashy. 101 00:05:40,440 --> 00:05:41,875 Include a personal note from me. 102 00:05:41,875 --> 00:05:44,077 And what exactly do you want it to say? 103 00:05:44,077 --> 00:05:47,981 Something personal that shows the depth of my feelings, my emotions. 104 00:05:47,981 --> 00:05:49,883 You'’’re good at that. That'’’s why I hired you. 105 00:05:49,883 --> 00:05:52,018 Okay, but it'’’s not gonna work. 106 00:05:56,056 --> 00:05:57,724 My man. 107 00:06:00,527 --> 00:06:02,696 Oh, Dougie! 108 00:06:02,696 --> 00:06:04,764 Doogan. Doog-ray. 109 00:06:04,764 --> 00:06:06,700 Douglas. 110 00:06:06,700 --> 00:06:08,702 It'’’s Drew. 111 00:06:08,702 --> 00:06:10,570 Drew Latham. 112 00:06:10,570 --> 00:06:12,405 Yeah. What'’’s up, man? 113 00:06:12,405 --> 00:06:15,308 What are you up? Ah, nothin'’’, nothin'’’. 114 00:06:15,308 --> 00:06:18,645 Hey, man, what'’’re you doing for Christmas? 115 00:06:18,645 --> 00:06:21,848 Family? Nice. Nice call. 116 00:06:21,848 --> 00:06:25,819 Uh, you got room for one more? 117 00:06:25,819 --> 00:06:28,888 Well, I think we are that close. 118 00:06:30,957 --> 00:06:33,660 I love Jewish Christ... I'’’ll light candles or whatever, 119 00:06:33,660 --> 00:06:34,861 spin the dreidel. 120 00:06:34,861 --> 00:06:38,531 It'’’ll be great, a matza ball soup, baklava. 121 00:06:38,531 --> 00:06:42,268 All right, well, that'’’s Greek. Fine, whatever. I'’’m just... 122 00:06:42,268 --> 00:06:43,436 You still there? 123 00:06:44,938 --> 00:06:47,907 No, I know you have a baby. I'’’m just saying, like, you know, 124 00:06:47,907 --> 00:06:51,311 they just lie there and crap themselves, right? 125 00:06:51,311 --> 00:06:53,913 After a while, how interesting is that? 126 00:06:53,913 --> 00:06:56,950 No, I'’’m not saying anything bad. I'’’m just sayin'’’. 127 00:06:56,950 --> 00:06:58,785 Huh? 128 00:06:58,785 --> 00:07:01,788 Well, maybe your wife doesn'’’t have to come, man. 129 00:07:01,788 --> 00:07:03,723 Maybe it'’’s just me and you for Christmas. 130 00:07:03,723 --> 00:07:05,291 You ever think about that? 131 00:07:08,194 --> 00:07:12,232 Would you mind if I came by to your house and spent Christmas? 132 00:07:12,232 --> 00:07:16,436 It'’’s like one or two, three days, tops. 133 00:07:16,436 --> 00:07:18,838 [pen scratching] 134 00:08:06,453 --> 00:08:08,988 [sighs] All right. 135 00:08:08,988 --> 00:08:11,591 Merry Christmas. 136 00:08:14,561 --> 00:08:18,198 [jet engines roaring] 137 00:08:18,198 --> 00:08:21,067 [Freeman] Okay, right over here. Everyone stay together. 138 00:08:21,067 --> 00:08:23,837 All real good. Okay, you'’’ve got Tu-Tu... 139 00:08:23,837 --> 00:08:26,973 [Drew] Doctor Freeman! Thank God, I found you. 140 00:08:26,973 --> 00:08:28,541 Sir, sir. 141 00:08:28,541 --> 00:08:31,978 I gotta spend Christmas alone. I'’’m having a panic attack. 142 00:08:31,978 --> 00:08:33,880 You gotta help me. Please! 143 00:08:33,880 --> 00:08:35,648 Excuse me. Who are you? I don'’’t know you. 144 00:08:35,648 --> 00:08:37,584 I'’’m the boyfriend of one of your patients. 145 00:08:37,584 --> 00:08:39,319 - You are? - Missy Vangilder, yes. 146 00:08:39,319 --> 00:08:42,155 [laughing] You'’’re Drew. You'’’re Drew. Oh, God. 147 00:08:42,155 --> 00:08:44,357 - What does that mn? - I'’’m not allowed to say. 148 00:08:44,357 --> 00:08:45,859 How did you find me? 149 00:08:45,859 --> 00:08:47,594 I bribed a woman at your service. 150 00:08:47,594 --> 00:08:51,097 She should raise her standards or fire her. 151 00:08:51,097 --> 00:08:52,899 She totally caved for like 200 bucks. 152 00:08:52,899 --> 00:08:54,868 - Whatever. - I just need a few minutes. 153 00:08:54,868 --> 00:08:57,337 Backpacks on the belt. Game Boy too. 154 00:08:57,337 --> 00:09:00,340 You gotta help me out. I don'’’t wanna spend Christmas alone. 155 00:09:00,340 --> 00:09:02,008 If you would just, please! 156 00:09:02,008 --> 00:09:04,010 She'’’s gotta put the teddy bear on the belt. 157 00:09:04,010 --> 00:09:05,612 Can'’’t she walk it through? 158 00:09:05,612 --> 00:09:07,447 She'’’s got to put the bear on the belt. 159 00:09:07,447 --> 00:09:09,549 - It'’’s a puppy! - I know it'’’s a puppy. 160 00:09:09,549 --> 00:09:11,551 Put Tu-Tu on the belt and she'’’ll go for a ride. 161 00:09:11,551 --> 00:09:13,987 - My Tu-Tu! - I need one second. 162 00:09:13,987 --> 00:09:15,388 If you could just, please! 163 00:09:15,388 --> 00:09:18,892 - Okay, gimme the puppy. - Sir, I need you to step here. 164 00:09:18,892 --> 00:09:20,760 [Drew] You'’’re abusing your child. 165 00:09:20,760 --> 00:09:23,596 Can'’’t you see I'’’ve got my own problems? 166 00:09:23,596 --> 00:09:25,699 - Whoa, whoa, now. - I'’’m sorry. 167 00:09:25,699 --> 00:09:27,167 I am so sorry. 168 00:09:27,167 --> 00:09:28,802 Okay. Okay. 169 00:09:28,802 --> 00:09:30,804 Hey, I know. Uh... 170 00:09:30,804 --> 00:09:33,206 - Heard it on e radio once. - All right. 171 00:09:33,206 --> 00:09:36,242 Write down all your grievances about your family on a paper. 172 00:09:36,242 --> 00:09:38,044 - All your grievances. - Right, yeah. 173 00:09:38,044 --> 00:09:40,714 Go someplace that reminds you of your childhood, 174 00:09:40,714 --> 00:09:43,583 at sunt and light that piece of paper on fire. 175 00:09:43,583 --> 00:09:47,320 As the last shred of paper is burning away, you whisper, 176 00:09:47,320 --> 00:09:48,588 "I forgive you." 177 00:09:48,588 --> 00:09:50,657 - "I forgive you." - Mmm-hmm. 178 00:09:50,657 --> 00:09:52,959 - And it burns up. - That'’’s it. 179 00:09:52,959 --> 00:09:54,294 I like it. 180 00:09:54,294 --> 00:09:56,329 - Oh, thanks so much! - Whoa! Alright. 181 00:09:56,329 --> 00:09:57,997 - Have a good vaca. - Okay. 182 00:09:57,997 --> 00:09:59,632 - Where'’’s my daughter? - [beeping] 183 00:09:59,632 --> 00:10:01,901 - Sir? - Huh? Oh, there she is. 184 00:10:01,901 --> 00:10:04,771 Whoa! Hey! Come on out! Come on out for Daddy! 185 00:10:17,650 --> 00:10:20,086 My grievances. 186 00:10:35,635 --> 00:10:38,371 Okay, buddy, here we go. That'’’ll be $72.50. 187 00:10:38,371 --> 00:10:40,173 My God! 188 00:10:40,173 --> 00:10:41,975 That'’’s it! 189 00:10:41,975 --> 00:10:44,077 That'’’s the house I grew up in. 190 00:10:44,077 --> 00:10:47,247 How'’’s the $72.50 comin'’’? 191 00:10:47,247 --> 00:10:50,316 Good. It'’’s comin'’’ good. 192 00:10:50,316 --> 00:10:52,218 Keep the meter running. 193 00:11:14,240 --> 00:11:18,044 - [Tom] Almost out of salami. - [Christine] No. 194 00:11:18,044 --> 00:11:19,746 Well, thank you fotelling me. 195 00:11:19,746 --> 00:11:21,247 I don'’’t wanna run out, that'’’s all. 196 00:11:21,247 --> 00:11:22,515 God forbid. 197 00:11:22,515 --> 00:11:24,551 - Did Brian eat? - I don'’’t know. 198 00:11:24,551 --> 00:11:27,120 [shouting] Brian, get down here and eat your dinner. 199 00:11:27,120 --> 00:11:29,923 - I'’’m not hungry! - [Tom] Yeah, you are! 200 00:11:29,923 --> 00:11:32,659 [Christine] Stop yelling at me. 201 00:11:32,659 --> 00:11:34,260 [Tom] I'’’m not yelling at you. 202 00:11:34,994 --> 00:11:37,530 Brian! 203 00:11:39,799 --> 00:11:41,368 [shouting]rian! 204 00:11:41,368 --> 00:11:43,670 Get down here, please, so your father can stop 205 00:11:43,670 --> 00:11:45,538 not yelling at me! 206 00:11:45,538 --> 00:11:47,540 I'’’m busy! 207 00:11:47,540 --> 00:11:49,776 We shouldn'’’t have put the computer in his room. 208 00:11:49,776 --> 00:11:51,878 He'’’s gonna spend all his time there. 209 00:11:51,878 --> 00:11:54,247 Oh, Tom. Welcome to the future, dear. 210 00:11:54,247 --> 00:11:55,815 He'’’s advancing his skills. 211 00:11:55,815 --> 00:11:59,052 One day that computer'’’s gonna get our baby a good job. 212 00:12:06,026 --> 00:12:08,828 Trust me. What he'’’s doin'’’, nobody'’’s gonna pay him for. 213 00:12:08,828 --> 00:12:11,664 '’’Cause if they did, I'’’d have retired at 17. 214 00:12:15,802 --> 00:12:18,905 - [Tom] What? - There'’’s a guy out there. 215 00:12:18,905 --> 00:12:20,874 Who the hell is that? 216 00:12:32,485 --> 00:12:35,388 [Drew] All right. Alone on Christmas. I can do this. 217 00:12:35,388 --> 00:12:40,927 [sighs] I rid myself of all my grievances. 218 00:12:40,927 --> 00:12:43,096 - Be gone, grievances. - [door opening] 219 00:12:45,632 --> 00:12:48,001 What the...? 220 00:12:50,337 --> 00:12:51,504 I forgive you. 221 00:12:54,808 --> 00:12:57,744 Holy Moly. This joker. 222 00:13:21,368 --> 00:13:24,104 What are the neighbors gonna think? 223 00:13:24,104 --> 00:13:25,772 If they don'’’t wanna get hit, 224 00:13:25,772 --> 00:13:27,774 they shouldn'’’t be burning crap in my yard. 225 00:13:27,774 --> 00:13:29,542 Is he still breathing? 226 00:13:31,478 --> 00:13:33,847 Dear God, Tom. You'’’ve killed the man. 227 00:13:33,847 --> 00:13:35,982 Oh! He'’’s still alive! 228 00:13:35,982 --> 00:13:38,952 [groaning] Hello. 229 00:13:40,420 --> 00:13:41,588 [whimpers] 230 00:13:44,157 --> 00:13:45,925 My name is Drew Latham. 231 00:13:45,925 --> 00:13:47,627 [chuckles] 232 00:13:47,627 --> 00:13:51,464 Uh, I grew up in this house. 233 00:13:51,464 --> 00:13:54,701 That'’’s why you came back and tried to burn it down, Pyroboy? 234 00:13:54,701 --> 00:13:56,870 - Brian, call the cops. - Oh, no, no! 235 00:13:56,870 --> 00:13:58,805 That won'’’t be necessary. That'’’s fine. 236 00:13:58,805 --> 00:14:00,607 I was just outside burning... 237 00:14:00,607 --> 00:14:03,209 Someone told me to burn a list of my personal grievances 238 00:14:03,209 --> 00:14:04,844 outside the home of my birth 239 00:14:04,844 --> 00:14:06,780 to help me with some loneliness issues. 240 00:14:06,780 --> 00:14:08,548 So, it'’’s all fine. 241 00:14:08,548 --> 00:14:13,319 Anyhoo, apologies and I'’’m gonna go. 242 00:14:13,319 --> 00:14:14,721 Would you mind terribly 243 00:14:14,721 --> 00:14:16,790 if I took a look-see around the house? 244 00:14:16,790 --> 00:14:19,259 - Yeah, I'’’ll give you a tour. - [Drew] Oh, thank you. 245 00:14:19,259 --> 00:14:21,795 Hold on. 246 00:14:21,795 --> 00:14:24,531 - You got any more matches? - No. No, no, no. 247 00:14:24,531 --> 00:14:26,066 Are we done with all that? 248 00:14:26,066 --> 00:14:27,500 Yes. The burning. Yes. 249 00:14:27,500 --> 00:14:30,203 It'’’s completely done. I'’’m actually quite better. 250 00:14:30,203 --> 00:14:31,571 I'’’m watching you. 251 00:14:34,607 --> 00:14:38,044 Wow. I can'’’t believe it! 252 00:14:38,044 --> 00:14:40,780 This is amazing! It'’’s exactly how I remember it. 253 00:14:40,780 --> 00:14:43,516 You mean you'’’re saying it was always a stinkhole? 254 00:14:43,516 --> 00:14:45,752 No. No, it'’’s great. 255 00:14:51,124 --> 00:14:52,892 [squeak] 256 00:14:52,892 --> 00:14:55,862 - Did you hear that? - [squeaking] 257 00:14:55,862 --> 00:14:58,331 That stair squeaked. 258 00:14:58,331 --> 00:15:01,067 Do you know what we used to call that squeaky stair? 259 00:15:01,067 --> 00:15:02,736 "The squeaky stair." 260 00:15:02,736 --> 00:15:04,204 [laughing] 261 00:15:04,204 --> 00:15:07,474 - [squeaking] - [laughing] 262 00:15:15,849 --> 00:15:19,719 Wow. My old room. 263 00:15:19,719 --> 00:15:21,154 My God. 264 00:15:21,154 --> 00:15:24,491 Hey, look at that! I can touch the ceiling. 265 00:15:24,491 --> 00:15:26,559 It'’’s so much smaller than I remember it. 266 00:15:26,559 --> 00:15:27,927 Did you do something? 267 00:15:27,927 --> 00:15:30,797 Yeah. We had it reduced. 268 00:15:30,797 --> 00:15:34,300 Cost a lot, but yeah, I think it was... 269 00:15:34,300 --> 00:15:35,835 Yeah, I think it was worth it. 270 00:15:35,835 --> 00:15:38,204 Man, this is great. Man, this is the best. 271 00:15:38,204 --> 00:15:41,741 You guys sittin'’’ around eatin'’’ dinner like a family. 272 00:15:41,741 --> 00:15:44,644 I always wanted that. This is really wonderful. 273 00:15:46,312 --> 00:15:47,681 [Brian] Wonderful. 274 00:15:47,681 --> 00:15:49,849 So, what'’’s for dessert? 275 00:15:49,849 --> 00:15:52,585 - Kitchen'’’s closed. - Aw. 276 00:15:52,585 --> 00:15:54,688 - Yeah, I got things to do. - Ah, boy. 277 00:15:54,688 --> 00:15:57,157 Tom, why don'’’t you see the man out? 278 00:15:57,157 --> 00:15:59,859 I didn'’’t want to let him in. I'’’ll call you a cab. 279 00:15:59,859 --> 00:16:01,895 Is that necessary? 280 00:16:01,895 --> 00:16:03,263 Yeah, it is. Yeah. 281 00:16:03,263 --> 00:16:05,965 But you know, man, I gotta tell ya, 282 00:16:05,965 --> 00:16:08,535 all these years I'’’ve been kind of avoiding Christmas, 283 00:16:08,535 --> 00:16:09,936 and I just realized, 284 00:16:09,936 --> 00:16:12,839 this is what I'’’ve been longing for. 285 00:16:12,839 --> 00:16:16,209 A real family, you know? In a true home. 286 00:16:16,209 --> 00:16:18,945 That'’’s why I'’’m thinking 287 00:16:18,945 --> 00:16:21,948 it might be a good idea if I lived with you. 288 00:16:21,948 --> 00:16:24,117 - [grunts] - [door slams] 289 00:16:56,249 --> 00:16:59,052 [knocking] Tom! Tom! 290 00:17:00,353 --> 00:17:02,822 Tom, please! Please let me stay here! 291 00:17:02,822 --> 00:17:03,957 No. 292 00:17:03,957 --> 00:17:04,924 I'’’ll pay you. 293 00:17:04,924 --> 00:17:06,893 My family'’’s not for sale, pal. 294 00:17:06,893 --> 00:17:09,662 Tom, I'’’ll pay you $250,000. 295 00:17:10,830 --> 00:17:12,065 Welcome home, son. 296 00:17:13,533 --> 00:17:15,602 [splashing] 297 00:17:15,602 --> 00:17:17,137 Mom. 298 00:17:22,609 --> 00:17:24,911 Tom, that guy is still here. 299 00:17:24,911 --> 00:17:27,714 - Yeah, I know. - Why is he still here? 300 00:17:29,482 --> 00:17:33,186 He'’’s givin'’’ us $250,000 to be his family for Christmas. 301 00:17:33,186 --> 00:17:36,523 And you agreed to this? Without asking me? 302 00:17:36,523 --> 00:17:40,260 Of course I did. He'’’s giving us $250,000. 303 00:17:40,260 --> 00:17:43,430 How would you like it if I agreed to this without asking you? 304 00:17:43,430 --> 00:17:46,433 Well, that would depend. Would we be getting $250,000? 305 00:17:49,636 --> 00:17:52,305 Okay. What exactly did you agree to? 306 00:17:55,308 --> 00:17:56,576 [sighs] 307 00:18:03,616 --> 00:18:05,585 It'’’s a big day for this family. 308 00:18:05,585 --> 00:18:07,520 Very well. All right. 309 00:18:07,520 --> 00:18:11,491 Mr. Latham agrees to pay the sum of $250,000 310 00:18:11,491 --> 00:18:14,060 to the Valcos for services rendered 311 00:18:14,060 --> 00:18:17,130 until 11:59 pm on Christmas Day. 312 00:18:17,130 --> 00:18:20,000 And for said sum, the Valco family 313 00:18:20,000 --> 00:18:23,403 will aid Mr. Latham in recapturing 314 00:18:23,403 --> 00:18:26,573 those childhood Christmas memories, 315 00:18:26,573 --> 00:18:29,342 - including, but not limited to, - [sighs] 316 00:18:29,342 --> 00:18:31,578 all due festiveness, celebrations, 317 00:18:31,578 --> 00:18:34,047 various and sundry merriments, 318 00:18:34,047 --> 00:18:36,316 and yuletide glee. 319 00:18:36,316 --> 00:18:38,485 Agreed! 320 00:18:38,485 --> 00:18:40,420 Agreed, right? 321 00:18:40,420 --> 00:18:42,756 Fakin'’’ it anyway. Might as well get paid. 322 00:18:42,756 --> 00:18:44,624 Will there be anything else? 323 00:18:44,624 --> 00:18:46,926 Oh, yeah. I gotta sleep in Brian'’’s room. 324 00:18:46,926 --> 00:18:48,428 What? No. 325 00:18:48,428 --> 00:18:49,963 Where is this going here? 326 00:18:49,963 --> 00:18:51,698 What? Like it says in the contract. 327 00:18:51,698 --> 00:18:53,333 I get to sleep in my old room. 328 00:18:53,333 --> 00:18:56,102 [Brian] Oh, come on. Creepy grievance guy 329 00:18:56,102 --> 00:18:57,704 wants to sleep in my room? 330 00:18:57,704 --> 00:18:59,639 If I wanted that, I'’’d use a bus ticket 331 00:18:59,639 --> 00:19:01,307 these guys keep sending me on the Net. 332 00:19:01,307 --> 00:19:04,344 I wanna sleep in my old room, like it says in the contract. 333 00:19:04,344 --> 00:19:06,546 Brian, you'’’re in the guest room. 334 00:19:06,546 --> 00:19:08,515 My computer'’’s not in the guest room, Mom. 335 00:19:08,515 --> 00:19:10,717 How am I supposed to... study? 336 00:19:10,717 --> 00:19:12,686 Use your imagination. 337 00:19:12,686 --> 00:19:15,522 Well, I'’’m gonna catch some shut-eye. 338 00:19:15,522 --> 00:19:19,626 Who wants to go Christmas tree shopping with me in the morning? 339 00:19:22,429 --> 00:19:30,437 Apparently, you all do. 340 00:19:34,274 --> 00:19:36,176 [yawns] 341 00:19:48,621 --> 00:19:51,091 I'’’m home. 342 00:20:03,636 --> 00:20:05,338 [shouting] 343 00:20:06,506 --> 00:20:08,641 [Christine] Brian? Brian! 344 00:20:08,641 --> 00:20:10,610 [Brian] I didn'’’t do it. 345 00:20:10,610 --> 00:20:11,878 [Drew] It'’’s all right. 346 00:20:11,878 --> 00:20:15,749 [chuckling] I'’’ll fix it. I'’’ll fix it. Ow. 347 00:20:22,055 --> 00:20:25,525 [Tom] Well, that should do it, assuming no other idiot... 348 00:20:32,198 --> 00:20:33,633 Is he eatin'’’ my salami? 349 00:20:33,633 --> 00:20:35,802 That'’’s what it looks like. 350 00:20:37,671 --> 00:20:40,507 - It'’’s 9:00 in the mornin'’’. - Oh, I know. 351 00:20:40,507 --> 00:20:42,108 It'’’s not really breakfast food, 352 00:20:42,108 --> 00:20:44,544 but it was lookin'’’ good. I had to dog some. 353 00:20:44,544 --> 00:20:46,913 Yeah, it is good. 354 00:20:46,913 --> 00:20:50,383 - Is that the last of it? - Yep. 355 00:21:02,462 --> 00:21:05,598 Oh, you didn'’’t want some, did ya? 356 00:21:05,598 --> 00:21:08,335 No. It'’’s all right. It'’’s fine, it'’’s fine. 357 00:21:08,335 --> 00:21:09,836 Ah. 358 00:21:12,372 --> 00:21:14,874 [Drew] Kathryn, I hope you'’’re checking messages. 359 00:21:14,874 --> 00:21:17,644 Should anyone need to reach me, they can call my cell. 360 00:21:17,644 --> 00:21:19,979 If you need to send me anything, the address is 361 00:21:19,979 --> 00:21:23,950 2 Edgewood Road in Lincoln Wood, Illinois. 362 00:21:23,950 --> 00:21:25,919 Stayin'’’ with my family. 363 00:21:27,187 --> 00:21:28,321 Hey, Dad? 364 00:21:31,257 --> 00:21:33,626 He'’’s talkin'’’ to you, genius. 365 00:21:34,994 --> 00:21:36,930 Yeah, Drew? 366 00:21:38,498 --> 00:21:41,334 Would you, uh, do me a kindness? 367 00:21:41,334 --> 00:21:42,635 Put this hat on. 368 00:21:42,635 --> 00:21:44,604 My dad always used to wear a Santa hat 369 00:21:44,604 --> 00:21:47,073 when we went Christmas tree shopping. 370 00:21:47,073 --> 00:21:49,009 - In public? - Yeah. 371 00:21:49,009 --> 00:21:50,610 That would be no. 372 00:21:50,610 --> 00:21:53,980 And in private, that would be no too. 373 00:21:53,980 --> 00:21:55,648 Please wear the hat. 374 00:21:56,783 --> 00:21:59,052 No, I'’’m not wearing the hat. 375 00:21:59,052 --> 00:22:01,287 Tom, you gotta wear the hat. 376 00:22:01,287 --> 00:22:03,790 - I'’’m not wearin'’’ the hat. - Wear the hat, Tom. 377 00:22:03,790 --> 00:22:06,593 Now, get it away from me before I shove it up your ass. 378 00:22:09,029 --> 00:22:12,665 Tom, are you familiar with the phrase "breach of contract" 379 00:22:17,303 --> 00:22:20,874 - Give me the hat. - All right. 380 00:22:20,874 --> 00:22:25,278 $250,000. $250,000. 381 00:22:25,278 --> 00:22:28,515 - $250,000. - [Brian chuckling] 382 00:22:28,515 --> 00:22:30,050 You'’’re lookin'’’ good, Dad. 383 00:22:30,050 --> 00:22:31,918 - [Christine] Tom! - Shut up! Hear me? 384 00:22:31,918 --> 00:22:33,887 Eyes on the road. Eyes on the road. Dad. 385 00:22:33,887 --> 00:22:35,555 - Give me your leg. - [screeching] 386 00:22:35,555 --> 00:22:37,524 [Drew] No. 387 00:22:41,294 --> 00:22:43,163 Nope. 388 00:22:43,163 --> 00:22:44,964 Oh, wait a minute. 389 00:22:44,964 --> 00:22:46,966 This could be it. This could be it. 390 00:22:46,966 --> 00:22:49,436 Yep. This is it. This is the one. 391 00:22:49,436 --> 00:22:52,305 [Drew] You'’’re good. Excuse me, folks. 392 00:22:52,305 --> 00:22:56,276 Dad, you wanna lift th up, have respect for the tree? 393 00:22:56,276 --> 00:22:57,644 No? 394 00:22:57,644 --> 00:23:00,413 It'’’s gonna be in our house, so, uh... 395 00:23:00,413 --> 00:23:03,149 Wait, wait, wait. Where are we going with this? 396 00:23:04,551 --> 00:23:07,721 Let'’’s get that baby up there, hoist that up. 397 00:23:07,721 --> 00:23:10,256 - Get that on the roof. - [Tom grunts] 398 00:23:10,256 --> 00:23:12,092 All right-y. 399 00:23:12,092 --> 00:23:13,993 [Drew] That'’’s pretty good. Alright! 400 00:23:13,993 --> 00:23:15,762 You got it. There you go. 401 00:23:15,762 --> 00:23:17,731 Get around it. Get around on it. 402 00:23:17,731 --> 00:23:19,966 [Tom straining] ian! 403 00:23:21,134 --> 00:23:23,003 [Drew] You got it, Dad. You got it. 404 00:23:23,003 --> 00:23:24,637 You got it. 405 00:23:24,637 --> 00:23:26,673 Nice one. All right. I think it'’’s good. 406 00:23:26,673 --> 00:23:28,408 I think it'’’s good like that. 407 00:23:28,408 --> 00:23:31,411 Whoo! Christmas time. 408 00:23:36,449 --> 00:23:37,984 [Drew] How does it look? 409 00:23:37,984 --> 00:23:39,986 [Brian] Like it could trigger a seizure. 410 00:23:39,986 --> 00:23:42,622 I know. Wait till you see it lit up. 411 00:23:42,622 --> 00:23:44,024 I thought it was lit up. 412 00:23:44,024 --> 00:23:47,394 Oh, no, no. We gotta sing Christmas Tree first. 413 00:23:47,394 --> 00:23:49,629 Tom, you take the lead. 414 00:23:49,629 --> 00:23:52,465 - You want me to sing? - Yeah. 415 00:23:53,533 --> 00:23:57,804 - Do I have to? - Yeah. 416 00:23:57,804 --> 00:24:00,440 Would it make any difference if I didn'’’t want to? 417 00:24:00,440 --> 00:24:01,508 Not really. 418 00:24:03,877 --> 00:24:05,745 Come on. 419 00:24:07,747 --> 00:24:09,949 ^^ Oh, Christmas tree ^^ 420 00:24:09,949 --> 00:24:12,452 Christine, you wanna help me out here a little bit? 421 00:24:12,452 --> 00:24:14,521 No, you'’’re doin'’’ great. 422 00:24:14,521 --> 00:24:18,525 You'’’re doin'’’ good, Dad. Come on. You can do it. 423 00:24:21,895 --> 00:24:25,832 [both] ^^ Oh, Christmas tree Oh, Christmas tree ^^ 424 00:24:25,832 --> 00:24:29,336 ^^ You stand in woodland beauty ^^ 425 00:24:29,336 --> 00:24:31,404 ^^ You are as green ^^ 426 00:24:31,404 --> 00:24:33,173 - ^^ As winter snow ^^ - ^^ As summer snow ^^ 427 00:24:33,173 --> 00:24:35,542 - Winter snow. - ^^ Winter snow ^^ 428 00:24:35,542 --> 00:24:39,212 ^^ As in summer'’’s brightest glow ^^ 429 00:24:39,212 --> 00:24:44,517 ^^ Oh, Christmas tree Oh, Christmas tree ^^ 430 00:24:44,517 --> 00:24:49,189 ^^ You stand in woodland beauty ^^ 431 00:24:49,189 --> 00:24:51,591 ^^ Ahhh ^^^^ 432 00:24:51,591 --> 00:24:52,926 That was great. 433 00:24:52,926 --> 00:24:55,662 - rew] That was really good. - [Tom] That was, yeah. 434 00:24:55,662 --> 00:24:58,231 All right. Without further ado, 435 00:24:58,231 --> 00:25:01,401 let'’’s fire it up. Ready? One, two... 436 00:25:01,401 --> 00:25:03,970 - [knocking] - [groans] 437 00:25:03,970 --> 00:25:06,339 All right, people. Take five. I'’’ll deal with this. 438 00:25:06,339 --> 00:25:08,208 Thank Christ. 439 00:25:09,776 --> 00:25:11,177 Can I help you? 440 00:25:13,279 --> 00:25:15,882 Yeah. Who are you? 441 00:25:15,882 --> 00:25:17,617 Um, who are you? 442 00:25:17,617 --> 00:25:19,419 [Christine] Alicia! 443 00:25:19,419 --> 00:25:21,755 Hey, Mom. Hi. Who'’’s this? 444 00:25:21,755 --> 00:25:24,057 Mom, who is this? 445 00:25:24,057 --> 00:25:25,859 Okay, what'’’s going on? 446 00:25:25,859 --> 00:25:29,295 Your dad'’’s rented us out to this eccentric millionaire. 447 00:25:29,295 --> 00:25:30,463 [Drew] You have a daughter? 448 00:25:30,463 --> 00:25:32,732 Christine, since when do you have a daughter? 449 00:25:32,732 --> 00:25:34,067 It'’’s her terrible secret. 450 00:25:34,067 --> 00:25:36,136 This is gonna ruin everything. 451 00:25:36,136 --> 00:25:38,705 - The whole bit doesn'’’t work. - Ruin? You know what? 452 00:25:38,705 --> 00:25:40,740 Shh. Will somebody please just say something 453 00:25:40,740 --> 00:25:42,609 that makes some sense right now? 454 00:25:42,609 --> 00:25:44,978 Every year at Christmas, I get a little anxiety... 455 00:25:44,978 --> 00:25:47,514 You stop talking. Mom? 456 00:25:47,514 --> 00:25:49,315 Drew wants a nice family Christmas 457 00:25:49,315 --> 00:25:50,784 so we'’’re gonna be his family. 458 00:25:50,784 --> 00:25:52,552 - That'’’s insane. - Yeah. Tell me about it. 459 00:25:52,552 --> 00:25:55,422 I never had a sister. 460 00:25:58,758 --> 00:26:00,794 Ooh, that could be good. Or, you know what? 461 00:26:00,794 --> 00:26:03,163 - She could be the maid! - Mom? Okay. Enough. 462 00:26:03,163 --> 00:26:04,998 Hey, my baby'’’s home. 463 00:26:04,998 --> 00:26:06,933 - Hi, Daddy. - How are you, Lissi? 464 00:26:06,933 --> 00:26:08,668 Hi. I'’’m good. 465 00:26:08,668 --> 00:26:10,303 You'’’ve obviously lost your mind. 466 00:26:10,303 --> 00:26:12,939 Can I talk to you in the dining room, please? 467 00:26:12,939 --> 00:26:14,207 You knew about this too? 468 00:26:14,207 --> 00:26:16,810 - Stay away from my daughter. - Okay, Mom... 469 00:26:16,810 --> 00:26:18,912 - This guy is obviously crazy. - I know. 470 00:26:18,912 --> 00:26:21,314 So I'’’m gonna go upstairs, and I'’’m gonna take a bath, 471 00:26:21,314 --> 00:26:22,949 and when I wake up in the morning, 472 00:26:22,949 --> 00:26:24,684 he'’’s gonna be gone, right? 473 00:26:24,684 --> 00:26:26,019 Maybe. 474 00:26:26,019 --> 00:26:28,788 I'’’m not gonna be a good sport about this, Mom. 475 00:26:28,788 --> 00:26:31,257 Oh, darling, we'’’d never expect you to be. 476 00:26:32,759 --> 00:26:34,427 Thanks. 477 00:26:34,427 --> 00:26:37,030 [Drew] Come on, Mom! It'’’s tree time! 478 00:26:41,801 --> 00:26:43,069 [Drew] Okey-dokey. 479 00:26:43,069 --> 00:26:45,472 All right. We'’’re back on track. 480 00:26:49,642 --> 00:26:50,910 Yeah. 481 00:26:52,045 --> 00:26:54,280 Okay. 482 00:26:54,280 --> 00:26:58,485 Here we go. One, two, three! 483 00:27:01,087 --> 00:27:03,623 [Drew] Now it feels like Christmas. 484 00:27:03,623 --> 00:27:06,292 [Brian] I can smell my eyeballs burning. 485 00:27:06,292 --> 00:27:09,295 [Drew] It'’’s very important. Don'’’t look directly at the tree. 486 00:27:09,295 --> 00:27:10,964 [dog barking] 487 00:27:19,139 --> 00:27:20,573 - Brian! - What? 488 00:27:20,573 --> 00:27:22,609 Wake up! It'’’s your brother, kind of! 489 00:27:22,609 --> 00:27:24,944 It'’’s snowing outside! It'’’s a snow day! 490 00:27:26,279 --> 00:27:27,814 Why the hell are you waking me up? 491 00:27:27,814 --> 00:27:30,216 I don'’’t want you to miss the fun, man! 492 00:27:31,618 --> 00:27:33,319 What fun? 493 00:27:33,319 --> 00:27:35,655 [Drew] Oh! Facial! Iceball! 494 00:27:35,655 --> 00:27:37,624 Whoo! Ha-ha! 495 00:27:37,624 --> 00:27:39,759 Look out! Oh! 496 00:27:39,759 --> 00:27:41,628 Right in the nuts! Right in the nuts! 497 00:27:41,628 --> 00:27:43,596 - I can'’’t feel my toes. - Here he comes. 498 00:27:43,596 --> 00:27:46,800 The look of vengeance. Eye of the tiger. 499 00:27:46,800 --> 00:27:48,802 Oh, oh. Now he'’’s getting furious. 500 00:27:48,802 --> 00:27:50,637 WhooWhoo! 501 00:27:51,738 --> 00:27:52,839 Whoo! 502 00:27:52,839 --> 00:27:55,241 [door closing] 503 00:27:56,843 --> 00:27:59,746 - What'’’s up, Tom? - Brian, go inside. 504 00:28:00,947 --> 00:28:03,817 See you later, Bri. It was fun. 505 00:28:03,817 --> 00:28:05,785 You like throwing snowballs? 506 00:28:05,785 --> 00:28:08,188 I was just havin'’’ a good time. You know. 507 00:28:08,188 --> 00:28:10,457 Yeah. Throw one at me. 508 00:28:10,457 --> 00:28:12,826 That'’’s cool, it'’’s all right. Don'’’t worry about it. 509 00:28:12,826 --> 00:28:14,461 We'’’re kinda finished now. 510 00:28:14,461 --> 00:28:16,763 Come on. Like you said, it'’’ll be fun. 511 00:28:16,763 --> 00:28:19,599 It'’’s getting a little chilly. I don'’’t wanna bother. 512 00:28:19,599 --> 00:28:22,469 - Don'’’t worry about it. - Ah, come on. Throw it. 513 00:28:23,970 --> 00:28:26,806 Alright, I'’’ll throw one, I'’’ll throw one. 514 00:28:32,746 --> 00:28:33,813 Good one. 515 00:28:36,282 --> 00:28:37,684 Now it'’’s my turn. 516 00:28:40,086 --> 00:28:42,022 No! 517 00:28:45,125 --> 00:28:46,860 [panting] That was great. 518 00:28:46,860 --> 00:28:49,129 Any time you wanna do that again, you let me know. 519 00:28:49,129 --> 00:28:51,064 We said no iceballs, man. 520 00:28:51,064 --> 00:28:55,235 Oh, did we? 521 00:28:55,235 --> 00:28:56,870 Freak. 522 00:28:58,571 --> 00:28:59,706 You know what? 523 00:29:01,408 --> 00:29:04,177 We may have gotten off on the wrong track the other day. 524 00:29:04,177 --> 00:29:05,578 We should just start over. 525 00:29:05,578 --> 00:29:07,480 - Here you go, Drew. - Oh, thanks, Mom. 526 00:29:07,480 --> 00:29:09,482 - Mmm. - Problem? 527 00:29:09,482 --> 00:29:13,119 My real mom puts marshmallows in the hot chocolate. 528 00:29:13,119 --> 00:29:14,688 You know what I was thinking? 529 00:29:14,688 --> 00:29:16,322 If you don'’’t wanna play my sister, 530 00:29:16,322 --> 00:29:19,426 maybe you could be, like, a wonderful, mysterious 531 00:29:19,426 --> 00:29:22,328 Ecuadorian cleaning lady. You know? 532 00:29:22,328 --> 00:29:25,231 Or a Swedish cleaning lady. The ethnicity'’’s not important. 533 00:29:25,231 --> 00:29:28,001 But cleaning lady'’’s good. Oh. Mmm. 534 00:29:28,001 --> 00:29:29,569 What? 535 00:29:29,569 --> 00:29:32,739 My real mom used the mini-marshmallows. Sorry. 536 00:29:32,739 --> 00:29:34,808 Speaking of your real mom, why aren'’’t you 537 00:29:34,808 --> 00:29:37,477 annoying the hell out of your own family? 538 00:29:37,477 --> 00:29:40,447 That'’’s not really your business, is it, Consuela? 539 00:29:47,220 --> 00:29:49,489 [Drew] Ho, ho, ho! 540 00:29:49,489 --> 00:29:52,859 Alrighty. Welcome, everyone. 541 00:29:54,494 --> 00:29:56,296 - Here you are. - What the hell is this? 542 00:29:56,296 --> 00:29:59,899 These are what we in the business call scripts, Tom. 543 00:29:59,899 --> 00:30:01,101 Excuse me? 544 00:30:01,101 --> 00:30:02,802 You don'’’t have to worry about it. 545 00:30:02,802 --> 00:30:04,904 Your role is what we call "small." 546 00:30:04,904 --> 00:30:08,641 Well, you'’’re what we in real life call "a jackass". 547 00:30:08,641 --> 00:30:10,210 I don'’’t know about that, 548 00:30:10,210 --> 00:30:13,780 but I do know that my being here may have caused some awkwardness 549 00:30:13,780 --> 00:30:15,682 - within the family. - You think? 550 00:30:15,682 --> 00:30:17,317 [Drew] I do, Tom. Seriously. 551 00:30:17,317 --> 00:30:21,021 And it'’’s even possible that some of it could potentially be 552 00:30:21,021 --> 00:30:23,356 in some small way partly my fault. 553 00:30:23,356 --> 00:30:25,825 Which part wasn'’’t your fault? 554 00:30:25,825 --> 00:30:28,395 Bop, bop, bop, bop. I'’’m talking. Okay? 555 00:30:28,395 --> 00:30:31,731 So what I'’’ve done is I went ahead and wrote a sequence, 556 00:30:31,731 --> 00:30:34,968 so you guys can get a sense of what I'’’m going for here. 557 00:30:34,968 --> 00:30:37,637 And we'’’re all gonna read this aloud. 558 00:30:37,637 --> 00:30:41,041 - I feel like I'’’m insane. - That'’’s why you ha no lines. 559 00:30:41,041 --> 00:30:43,777 - Mom, I believe you go first. - Okay. 560 00:30:43,777 --> 00:30:45,745 "Oh, look at us. 561 00:30:45,745 --> 00:30:49,683 I sure hope you like the meal I so lovingly prepared 562 00:30:49,683 --> 00:30:51,718 for the people I love. 563 00:30:51,718 --> 00:30:55,422 She smiles at Tom." Oh. 564 00:30:55,422 --> 00:30:58,758 [Drew] Have you acted? You'’’ve acted before. 565 00:30:58,758 --> 00:31:00,627 - A little theater. - Yeah? I can tell. 566 00:31:00,627 --> 00:31:02,328 I can see it. It comes out in your work. 567 00:31:02,328 --> 00:31:04,197 You were in Pippin in high school. 568 00:31:04,197 --> 00:31:05,865 You played Wind. 569 00:31:06,800 --> 00:31:09,235 Tom, you have the next line. 570 00:31:09,235 --> 00:31:11,071 Uh... 571 00:31:11,071 --> 00:31:13,173 "Say thank you to your mother for her hard work 572 00:31:13,173 --> 00:31:14,541 cooking this meal for us." 573 00:31:14,541 --> 00:31:17,010 "Thank you." 574 00:31:17,010 --> 00:31:19,579 "Oh, I don'’’t work nearly as hard as you, dear." 575 00:31:19,579 --> 00:31:20,947 Yeah, well, that'’’s true. 576 00:31:20,947 --> 00:31:22,749 Tom, let'’’s stay on book, please. 577 00:31:22,749 --> 00:31:24,050 Brian, go ahead. 578 00:31:24,050 --> 00:31:27,821 "Gee, Mom, I love you like the dickens. 579 00:31:27,821 --> 00:31:29,956 Should we pray?" 580 00:31:29,956 --> 00:31:33,360 Gee, Beav, do you think Wally'’’s gonna give you the business? 581 00:31:33,360 --> 00:31:35,929 Oh, there you are, Consuela. 582 00:31:35,929 --> 00:31:39,666 Five waters for everyone, please. Gracias. 583 00:31:39,666 --> 00:31:42,802 [clears throat] Brian, you were about to say grace. 584 00:31:44,471 --> 00:31:45,939 - "Dear God..." - [Drew] Brian. 585 00:31:45,939 --> 00:31:48,908 We hold hands in this family at grace. 586 00:31:51,344 --> 00:31:53,446 [Brian] "Dear God, 587 00:31:53,446 --> 00:31:54,914 thank you for this meal. 588 00:31:54,914 --> 00:31:57,050 Thank you for blessing us with a family. 589 00:31:57,050 --> 00:31:58,785 Not everyone has a nice family. 590 00:31:58,785 --> 00:32:00,587 And also we, Oh Lord, 591 00:32:00,587 --> 00:32:04,024 are so lucky to have Drew in our lives." 592 00:32:04,024 --> 00:32:05,725 Amen. 593 00:32:07,093 --> 00:32:09,429 "An emotional moment." 594 00:32:09,429 --> 00:32:11,398 Sorry, I keep doing that. 595 00:32:11,398 --> 00:32:15,001 "Brian, if you eat it all up, I will let you sleep with me 596 00:32:15,001 --> 00:32:18,171 like I never did when you were little." 597 00:32:20,507 --> 00:32:22,275 An awkward moment. 598 00:32:22,275 --> 00:32:24,878 Skip ahead. That doesn'’’t work. 599 00:32:24,878 --> 00:32:26,546 That'’’s not supposed to be there. 600 00:32:26,546 --> 00:32:27,914 What does this mean? 601 00:32:27,914 --> 00:32:29,983 "Doo-Dah enters in his bathrobe." 602 00:32:29,983 --> 00:32:34,020 Sweet Jim Jiminy! Cold corn in the mornin'’’! 603 00:32:34,020 --> 00:32:37,290 Whoo, this weather is killin'’’ my joints. 604 00:32:37,290 --> 00:32:38,625 Brian, go get the shovel. 605 00:32:38,625 --> 00:32:40,493 [Drew] Listen to me. When Alicia came, 606 00:32:40,493 --> 00:32:42,629 she totally ruined everything. 607 00:32:42,629 --> 00:32:45,065 Because everything was so normal up to that point. 608 00:32:45,065 --> 00:32:46,566 Silencio, por favor. 609 00:32:46,566 --> 00:32:48,234 So I realized what I had to do 610 00:32:48,234 --> 00:32:49,869 was expand the family. 611 00:32:49,869 --> 00:32:52,739 I had to find my grandpa. So I went and found my Doo-Dah. 612 00:32:52,739 --> 00:32:56,242 - Here he is. My Doo-Dah. - Your Doo-Dah looks exactly 613 00:32:56,242 --> 00:32:58,778 like the guy in Christmas Carol. Played Scrooge. 614 00:32:58,778 --> 00:33:01,147 That'’’s right. I do a lot of community theater. 615 00:33:01,147 --> 00:33:04,250 And this Christmas night, I'’’m reprising my role as Scrooge 616 00:33:04,250 --> 00:33:06,953 in the Lincoln Wood Theater Group'’’s production 617 00:33:06,953 --> 00:33:09,789 of A Christmas Carol. I hope you all can make it. 618 00:33:09,789 --> 00:33:12,425 Please stay in character, Saul, okay? 619 00:33:12,425 --> 00:33:14,294 "Doo-Dah, I'’’m so glad that you came here. 620 00:33:14,294 --> 00:33:17,130 And you'’’re gonna stay for the whole Christmas holiday." 621 00:33:17,130 --> 00:33:20,266 Whoa, no, he'’’s not. I agreed to let you in the house, 622 00:33:20,266 --> 00:33:23,169 - not Doo-Doo over here. - Doo-Dah. 623 00:33:23,169 --> 00:33:25,605 - Nobody'’’s talkin'’’ to you. - [groans] Alright, look. 624 00:33:25,605 --> 00:33:27,440 I'’’ll give you $25,000. 625 00:33:29,676 --> 00:33:31,378 How you doin'’’, uh, Doo-Dah? 626 00:33:31,378 --> 00:33:33,179 Nice to see you. Stay in the living room. 627 00:33:33,179 --> 00:33:35,582 No, Dad, I'’’m sleeping in the living room. 628 00:33:35,582 --> 00:33:37,083 Not anymore. 629 00:33:37,083 --> 00:33:39,753 Where am I gonna sleep? 630 00:33:39,753 --> 00:33:41,788 [dog barking] 631 00:33:44,624 --> 00:33:46,960 Ow. 632 00:33:46,960 --> 00:33:48,661 I hate these people. 633 00:33:48,661 --> 00:33:50,563 [^^ The Waitresses: Christmas Wrapping] 634 00:33:50,563 --> 00:33:52,298 ^^ Bah, humbug No, that'’’s too strong ^^ 635 00:33:52,298 --> 00:33:54,401 ^^'’’Cause it'’’s my favorite holiday ^^ 636 00:33:54,401 --> 00:33:56,336 ^^ But all this year'’’s been a busy blur ^^ 637 00:33:56,336 --> 00:33:58,505 ^^ Don'’’t think I have the energy ^^ 638 00:33:58,505 --> 00:34:00,607 ^^ So deck those halls, trim those trees ^^ 639 00:34:00,607 --> 00:34:02,642 ^^ Raise up cups of Christmas cheer ^^^^ 640 00:34:02,642 --> 00:34:06,413 Everybody get some presents, get your shoppin'’’ done, 641 00:34:06,413 --> 00:34:09,015 and then we'’’re gonna meet back at 4:00 at Santa'’’s Village 642 00:34:09,015 --> 00:34:10,283 to take pictures. Okay? 643 00:34:10,283 --> 00:34:12,285 Kids, don'’’t lose track of time. 644 00:34:12,285 --> 00:34:14,554 Mom, you wanna stick with Doo-Dah? 645 00:34:14,554 --> 00:34:17,991 - Why me? - He'’’s your father. 646 00:34:17,991 --> 00:34:19,626 [Doo-Dah] How come you never call? 647 00:34:19,626 --> 00:34:21,161 Tom! Tom! Tom! 648 00:34:21,161 --> 00:34:22,829 Yes, Drew? 649 00:34:22,829 --> 00:34:25,732 Aren'’’t you forgettin'’’ something, T-Bone? 650 00:34:27,100 --> 00:34:28,635 [deli man] Here you go, Lenny. 651 00:34:28,635 --> 00:34:30,403 Happy holidays to you and the family. 652 00:34:30,403 --> 00:34:32,305 - [Lenny] Thanks. You too. - Hey, Tommy! 653 00:34:32,305 --> 00:34:34,407 [laughing] Nice hat. 654 00:34:34,407 --> 00:34:36,743 How'’’s the holidays? 655 00:34:36,743 --> 00:34:38,278 Considering I got a pain in my ass 656 00:34:38,278 --> 00:34:40,413 about six feet tall in my house, alright. 657 00:34:40,413 --> 00:34:42,015 Oh, relatives, huh? 658 00:34:42,015 --> 00:34:44,117 - Yeah, kinda. - Oh, your wife'’’s family. 659 00:34:44,117 --> 00:34:47,354 They hang around your house all day and drink your beer. 660 00:34:48,221 --> 00:34:50,290 They eat your salami. 661 00:34:51,291 --> 00:34:53,760 Hey, guys! Wait up! 662 00:34:53,760 --> 00:34:54,994 [sighs] 663 00:34:54,994 --> 00:34:57,997 - [screeching] - [honking] 664 00:35:02,268 --> 00:35:04,971 ^^ Better not pout I'’’m telling you why ^^ 665 00:35:04,971 --> 00:35:09,909 ^^ Santa Claus is coming to town ^^ 666 00:35:12,178 --> 00:35:15,415 ^^ He'’’s making a list and checking it twice ^^ 667 00:35:15,415 --> 00:35:19,019 ^^ Gonna find out who'’’s naughty and nice ^^ 668 00:35:19,019 --> 00:35:21,354 [Drew] All right, there we go. 669 00:35:21,354 --> 00:35:22,789 Excuse me. 670 00:35:22,789 --> 00:35:24,824 ^^ He sees you when you'’’re sleeping ^^ 671 00:35:26,159 --> 00:35:28,028 All of you? 672 00:35:28,028 --> 00:35:30,463 ^^ He knows if you'’’ve been bad or good ^^ 673 00:35:30,463 --> 00:35:31,965 ^^ So be good for goodness sake ^^^^ 674 00:35:31,965 --> 00:35:33,199 Mom, this sucks. 675 00:35:33,199 --> 00:35:35,335 Tell your father. He made the deal. 676 00:35:35,335 --> 00:35:37,370 Alright, everybody say "Merry Christmas." 677 00:35:37,370 --> 00:35:39,205 [all] Merry Christmas! 678 00:35:39,205 --> 00:35:40,840 [Santa and Drew] Ho, ho, ho! 679 00:35:44,310 --> 00:35:46,913 Hey Doo-Dah, interest you in a Christmas cookie? 680 00:35:46,913 --> 00:35:48,515 I can'’’t. I'’’m diabetic. 681 00:35:48,515 --> 00:35:50,650 That dog won'’’t hunt, my friend. 682 00:35:50,650 --> 00:35:53,286 Doo-Dah wasn'’’t diabetic. So go ahead and take one. 683 00:35:53,286 --> 00:35:55,221 Look, kid, I get that. 684 00:35:55,221 --> 00:35:58,124 But if I eat this thing, I can'’’t act not dead. 685 00:35:58,124 --> 00:35:59,793 - [tires screeching] - Hey! 686 00:35:59,793 --> 00:36:01,895 Slow down. The roads are icy. 687 00:36:01,895 --> 00:36:04,364 And I don'’’t want you to kill your family! 688 00:36:04,364 --> 00:36:05,732 [Drew] Perfect, Christine. 689 00:36:05,732 --> 00:36:08,268 That'’’s what my mom would'’’ve said. Good improv. 690 00:36:08,268 --> 00:36:11,671 Before your father threw her out of the car. 691 00:36:11,671 --> 00:36:13,306 [door squeaks] 692 00:36:13,306 --> 00:36:16,209 Ah, the old carriage house. Brings back memories. 693 00:36:16,209 --> 00:36:18,278 - What'’’s going on? - Brian, go inside. 694 00:36:18,278 --> 00:36:20,747 What? Come on! Dad. 695 00:36:20,747 --> 00:36:23,450 I'’’m in my pajamas. You want me to sleep outside? 696 00:36:23,450 --> 00:36:25,685 Go. 697 00:36:25,685 --> 00:36:27,687 Fine. 698 00:36:28,722 --> 00:36:30,190 I can'’’t go in my room, I get... 699 00:36:30,190 --> 00:36:32,992 You know, but when I become a serial killer 700 00:36:32,992 --> 00:36:34,327 don'’’t act all surprised. 701 00:36:34,327 --> 00:36:36,363 Think positive, Bris-eye. 702 00:36:36,363 --> 00:36:39,466 Use your positive mindset. That'’’s not what we talked about. 703 00:36:39,466 --> 00:36:41,468 It'’’s hard to get through to him. 704 00:36:41,468 --> 00:36:43,370 So what'’’s goin'’’ on? What'’’s up? 705 00:36:43,370 --> 00:36:45,171 You gotta go. 706 00:36:45,171 --> 00:36:47,540 - What? - We can'’’t do this no more. 707 00:36:47,540 --> 00:36:50,677 What do you mean? What? What can'’’t we do? 708 00:36:50,677 --> 00:36:52,879 Christine and I... 709 00:36:52,879 --> 00:36:54,948 We'’’re thinkin'’’ about breakin'’’ up. 710 00:36:56,016 --> 00:36:58,351 What? Why? 711 00:36:58,351 --> 00:36:59,919 Is it my fault? Something I did? 712 00:36:59,919 --> 00:37:03,089 Is it the hat? Forget it. Wear whatever you want, Tom. 713 00:37:03,089 --> 00:37:05,191 No, it'’’s not you. It'’’s got nothin'’’ to do with you. 714 00:37:05,191 --> 00:37:06,860 It'’’s been goin'’’ on for a long time. 715 00:37:06,860 --> 00:37:09,629 We'’’re just... It'’’s not workin'’’ out. 716 00:37:09,629 --> 00:37:13,600 We were gonna wait till after the holidays to tell the kids, 717 00:37:13,600 --> 00:37:15,435 and you know, with you here, 718 00:37:15,435 --> 00:37:17,704 and th your Christmas cheer crap, 719 00:37:17,704 --> 00:37:19,172 it'’’s making it worse. 720 00:37:19,172 --> 00:37:21,174 Tom, first of all, 721 00:37:21,174 --> 00:37:22,676 I wanna reward you for opening up 722 00:37:22,676 --> 00:37:25,412 with a big "thank you," that deserves some credit. 723 00:37:25,412 --> 00:37:28,281 Second, let me tell you what you need to do. 724 00:37:28,281 --> 00:37:32,218 If I was you and I was comin'’’ into some money, I'’’d do somethin'’’ big, 725 00:37:32,218 --> 00:37:34,287 somethin'’’ you always wanted your whole life. 726 00:37:34,287 --> 00:37:36,356 Somethin'’’ for Tom, that makes you happy. 727 00:37:36,356 --> 00:37:39,192 I want the money. I really do. 728 00:37:39,192 --> 00:37:40,593 It'’’s Christine, she keeps... 729 00:37:40,593 --> 00:37:43,196 Alright. Let me worry about Christine, okay? 730 00:37:43,196 --> 00:37:45,065 - Oh. - I'’’ll worry about Christine. 731 00:37:45,065 --> 00:37:48,201 You worry about Tom, '’’cause it'’’s Tom time. 732 00:38:26,439 --> 00:38:27,974 LL BE REQUIRED TO DROP THE TRADITIONAL ANALOG SIGNAL IN ORDER TO TRANSITION TO THE ADVANCED DIGITAL FORMAT. BUT WHAT DOES THAT MEAN TO YOU? IF YOU ARE A BRIGHTHOUSE NETWORKS CUSTOMER, YOU WILL NOT HAVE TO DO ANYTHING TO CONTINUE TO WATCH EYEWITNESS NEWS, ABC NETWORK SHOWS AND MORE ON YOUR EXISTING SET. NO CONVERTER BOX, NO NEW TV. BRIGHTHOUSE WILL CONTINUE TO OFFER YOU THE SAME SERVICE WITH THE TV YOUR WATCHING NOW. FOR MORE INFORMATION LOG ONTO THE WEBSITE ON YOUR SCREEN. Can I talk to you about something? 733 00:38:28,041 --> 00:38:29,476 Of course, dear. I'm your mother. 734 00:38:29,542 --> 00:38:31,478 You can talk to me about anything. 735 00:38:31,544 --> 00:38:32,779 Great. 736 00:38:32,846 --> 00:38:36,216 - Are, uh, are you alright? - Uh-huh. 737 00:38:36,282 --> 00:38:39,753 You sure? 'Cause you just put a bra in Brian's sock drawer. 738 00:38:39,819 --> 00:38:41,488 Oh, well, that's your brother. 739 00:38:41,554 --> 00:38:44,657 15, likes to experiment. We still love him. 740 00:38:46,059 --> 00:38:48,995 Look, Christine. 741 00:38:49,062 --> 00:38:50,997 I know about what's going on with you and Tom, 742 00:38:51,064 --> 00:38:53,833 and first of all, I just wanna say that, uh, 743 00:38:53,900 --> 00:38:57,103 I'm feeling a little ripped off here, you know? 744 00:38:57,170 --> 00:38:59,539 I thought I was getting a real family. This is kinda... 745 00:38:59,606 --> 00:39:02,609 Well, it's time you grew up and faced facts, isn't it? Isn't it? 746 00:39:02,676 --> 00:39:05,745 Mommies and daddies fall in love, make babies, 747 00:39:05,812 --> 00:39:09,315 pay bills, get mad, and stop touching each other! 748 00:39:12,719 --> 00:39:15,021 Uh, second of all, 749 00:39:15,088 --> 00:39:17,457 I was thinkin' maybe I could do something to help you, 750 00:39:17,524 --> 00:39:18,491 make you feel better. 751 00:39:18,558 --> 00:39:20,760 How about just me and you go shopping? 752 00:39:20,827 --> 00:39:22,562 For what? 753 00:39:22,629 --> 00:39:23,363 I don't know. Just go shopping. 754 00:39:23,430 --> 00:39:24,631 You know what I mean? 755 00:39:24,698 --> 00:39:29,002 Listen, I know all the best makeup and hair people... 756 00:39:29,069 --> 00:39:32,072 The best fashion photographer in Chicago owes me huge! 757 00:39:32,138 --> 00:39:33,640 So? 758 00:39:33,707 --> 00:39:36,142 You don't see it, do you? 759 00:39:36,209 --> 00:39:39,813 You don't see what a beautiful woman you are. 760 00:39:39,879 --> 00:39:44,417 You have grace and kindness and sensuality, 761 00:39:44,484 --> 00:39:46,686 and this incredibly striking, 762 00:39:46,753 --> 00:39:50,056 kind of offbeat beauty that's... 763 00:39:50,123 --> 00:39:51,825 You look in the mirror, and don't see it. 764 00:39:51,891 --> 00:39:53,193 We're gonna show it to you. 765 00:39:53,259 --> 00:39:55,729 How would you like me to arrange your very own, 766 00:39:55,795 --> 00:40:00,066 hip, very sexy, yet tasteful, very elegant, very modern, 767 00:40:00,133 --> 00:40:04,004 very expensive photo shoot, just for you? 768 00:40:06,906 --> 00:40:08,174 [sobbing] 769 00:40:08,241 --> 00:40:10,744 Or not. I mean, whatever... 770 00:40:10,810 --> 00:40:15,849 Oh, Drew, you've made your mama so happy. 771 00:40:15,915 --> 00:40:17,717 [chuckles] Great. 772 00:40:19,419 --> 00:40:23,556 - Oh, Mom. - [Christine chuckles] 773 00:40:29,796 --> 00:40:30,964 [Drew] Hey, Alicia. 774 00:40:31,031 --> 00:40:32,565 Want to go tobogganing? 775 00:40:33,667 --> 00:40:34,868 Oh, I'm sorry, Drew. 776 00:40:34,934 --> 00:40:36,836 Have I been sending you mixed signals? 777 00:40:36,903 --> 00:40:40,240 [chuckles] I just thought maybe instead of sitting around 778 00:40:40,306 --> 00:40:43,309 bickering and hati me all day, you might li to have some fun. 779 00:40:43,376 --> 00:40:45,345 No, thanks. 780 00:40:45,412 --> 00:40:47,447 [Drew] Ah, I see. 781 00:40:47,514 --> 00:40:49,616 I get it. 782 00:40:49,683 --> 00:40:52,686 You're afraid of fun. You don't like having fun. 783 00:40:52,752 --> 00:40:55,555 What the hell does that even mean, "I don't like fun"? 784 00:40:55,622 --> 00:40:57,190 Of course I like fun. 785 00:40:57,257 --> 00:40:59,993 Everybody likes fun. It's fun. 786 00:41:00,060 --> 00:41:02,829 Alright, so, then why won't you go with me? 787 00:41:02,896 --> 00:41:05,031 Because it would be with you. 788 00:41:05,098 --> 00:41:07,934 You know what I think? I think you're afraid. 789 00:41:08,001 --> 00:41:10,837 I think you're afraid that you will go, and you will have fun, 790 00:41:10,904 --> 00:41:13,506 and you might even enjoy yourself, and you'd be with me, 791 00:41:13,573 --> 00:41:15,208 and what would that say about you? 792 00:41:15,275 --> 00:41:17,043 - That's what I think. - Really? 793 00:41:17,110 --> 00:41:18,545 [Drew] Mm-hmm. 794 00:41:19,446 --> 00:41:22,148 Let's go. 795 00:41:22,215 --> 00:41:24,417 - Well, hello there, youngsters. 796 00:41:24,484 --> 00:41:26,252 - Going toboaning? - Breakneck Hill. 797 00:41:26,319 --> 00:41:28,788 - That'll be fun. - [Drew] Yeah. 798 00:41:28,855 --> 00:41:30,357 Oh, what do you know? 799 00:41:30,423 --> 00:41:33,460 Back in my day, we couldn't afford fancy toboggans. 800 00:41:33,526 --> 00:41:34,527 [honking] 801 00:41:34,594 --> 00:41:36,363 [rock music playing] 802 00:41:42,268 --> 00:41:43,603 What do you think? 803 00:41:43,670 --> 00:41:45,171 Nice. 804 00:41:45,238 --> 00:41:47,707 Yeah. This'll keep you from dying, Dad. 805 00:41:47,774 --> 00:41:49,676 Had one of these babies when I was single. 806 00:41:49,743 --> 00:41:51,478 [Drew] I bet. 807 00:41:51,544 --> 00:41:54,014 Oh, know what happened to me on the way over here? 808 00:41:54,080 --> 00:41:56,082 - No, what? - Got propositioned by a hooker. 809 00:41:56,149 --> 00:41:58,184 - Did you? - The blonde with the big cans? 810 00:41:58,251 --> 00:42:01,054 Hey, Doo-Doo, watch your language around my daughter. 811 00:42:01,121 --> 00:42:04,290 Brian, take a look at your father's new automobile here! 812 00:42:04,357 --> 00:42:06,459 Yeah, what do you think? 813 00:42:06,526 --> 00:42:08,328 It's old. 814 00:42:08,395 --> 00:42:10,363 Alright, alright. Hey, Bri, come on. 815 00:42:10,430 --> 00:42:11,798 We're gonna go tobogganing. 816 00:42:11,865 --> 00:42:14,100 That's great. 817 00:42:19,139 --> 00:42:21,074 She's ready. 818 00:42:22,308 --> 00:42:24,477 Hi. I'm Christine. 819 00:42:26,079 --> 00:42:28,415 I feel so pretty. 820 00:42:35,622 --> 00:42:38,558 - What are you doing? - Modeling. 821 00:42:40,026 --> 00:42:41,528 [Heinrich] Here. 822 00:42:43,730 --> 00:42:48,335 Chad, have you ever seen me so elated? 823 00:42:48,401 --> 00:42:51,604 It must be this woman. Yes. 824 00:42:51,671 --> 00:42:55,508 Isn't she sexy? Erotic. 825 00:42:55,575 --> 00:42:57,510 - Speak! - Oh, absolutely, Heinrich. 826 00:42:57,577 --> 00:42:59,112 She's got that special quality... 827 00:42:59,179 --> 00:43:00,814 Get out now. 828 00:43:00,880 --> 00:43:03,416 - But I'm agreeing with you. - You hesitated. 829 00:43:05,018 --> 00:43:07,654 Yeah, you heard him. Get out! Beat it! 830 00:43:07,721 --> 00:43:10,290 Get out! Beat it! 831 00:43:10,357 --> 00:43:14,227 [chuckling] Uh-oh. He thinks we're serious. 832 00:43:14,294 --> 00:43:17,063 We were serious. 833 00:43:17,130 --> 00:43:19,532 Very serious. 834 00:43:19,599 --> 00:43:21,735 [^^ Warrant: She's My Cherry Pie] 835 00:43:21,801 --> 00:43:24,004 [Heinrich] Yeah! 836 00:43:24,070 --> 00:43:26,740 Ausgeseichnet! Yeah! 837 00:43:26,806 --> 00:43:29,542 Yeah! Yeah! 838 00:43:29,609 --> 00:43:33,413 Ah! Erot! Yeah! Yeah! 839 00:43:33,480 --> 00:43:34,514 Oh, yeah! Great! 840 00:43:34,581 --> 00:43:35,949 Oh, more! 841 00:43:36,016 --> 00:43:38,418 Lick the lollipop! Yeah! 842 00:43:38,485 --> 00:43:40,453 [Brian] I do not want to do this. 843 00:43:40,520 --> 00:43:42,422 [Drew] Ah, you say that now. 844 00:43:42,489 --> 00:43:44,724 Once you get going, you'll run and jump 845 00:43:44,791 --> 00:43:47,560 and squeal with joy. 846 00:43:47,627 --> 00:43:49,396 - [Drew] Okay? - [Alicia] Let's do this. 847 00:43:49,462 --> 00:43:51,264 [Drew] Here we go. Hunker down. 848 00:43:51,331 --> 00:43:54,200 Center your weight. Breakneck Hill! 849 00:43:58,471 --> 00:44:01,408 Whoo! Whoo! 850 00:44:01,474 --> 00:44:02,942 That was crazy! 851 00:44:03,009 --> 00:44:04,411 Did you see him fly down the hill? 852 00:44:04,477 --> 00:44:06,312 - That was crazy! - I made a mistake. 853 00:44:06,379 --> 00:44:07,914 It was scarier when I was younger. 854 00:44:07,981 --> 00:44:10,250 - Can we go home now? - No, we can't go home! 855 00:44:10,316 --> 00:44:13,853 We are gonna risk permanent paralysis or die trying! 856 00:44:19,793 --> 00:44:22,862 That one! Land! 857 00:44:25,598 --> 00:44:28,201 [Drew] Yes, sir! Whoo! 858 00:44:28,268 --> 00:44:30,937 - Gonna be some serious fun! - [Brian] Sure... 859 00:44:31,004 --> 00:44:33,173 ...in a Sonny Bono kind of way. 860 00:44:34,541 --> 00:44:36,810 What's that I hear back there? A little chicken? 861 00:44:36,876 --> 00:44:38,211 [clucks] 862 00:44:38,278 --> 00:44:41,314 - Chicken. - Yeah. And very much so. 863 00:44:41,381 --> 00:44:42,882 I'm gonna go home now. 864 00:44:42,949 --> 00:44:46,152 - Seriously? You're leaving? - [Brian] See ya at the chopper. 865 00:44:46,219 --> 00:44:47,587 Wow. 866 00:44:47,654 --> 00:44:50,390 Never thought I'd see the day that taunt would lose its power. 867 00:44:50,457 --> 00:44:51,825 What about you? A little chick? 868 00:44:51,891 --> 00:44:53,626 - Chicken with broccoli? - Actually... 869 00:44:53,693 --> 00:44:56,196 Part of me thinks that it's incredibly stupid, 870 00:44:56,262 --> 00:44:58,465 and the other part is in wholehearted agreement. 871 00:44:58,531 --> 00:45:00,467 - There you go. - That means you're chicken. 872 00:45:00,533 --> 00:45:02,002 - Know what I think? - What? 873 00:45:02,068 --> 00:45:04,637 I think that you had no intention 874 00:45:04,704 --> 00:45:06,139 of going down this hill. 875 00:45:06,206 --> 00:45:08,575 I think that you dragged us up here 876 00:45:08,641 --> 00:45:10,377 because you knew we wouldn't go down it. 877 00:45:10,443 --> 00:45:13,947 I think you were showing off. That's what I think. 878 00:45:14,014 --> 00:45:15,615 Wait a minute. You think I'm chicken? 879 00:45:15,682 --> 00:45:17,517 - You think I'm chicken? - [Alicia laughs] 880 00:45:17,584 --> 00:45:21,354 Let me give a little clue here, okay? 881 00:45:21,421 --> 00:45:24,024 You think I'm chicken? I'll show you who's chicken. 882 00:45:24,090 --> 00:45:25,625 You see how I do it? I'm ready to go. 883 00:45:25,692 --> 00:45:28,328 Where are you? Nowhere to be seen. Chicken. 884 00:45:28,395 --> 00:45:29,929 Alright. Come on. Let's go. 885 00:45:29,996 --> 00:45:31,631 - You're getting on? - Yeah. Let's go. 886 00:45:31,698 --> 00:45:34,134 - No, hold on! - Come on, push off. 887 00:45:34,200 --> 00:45:35,635 [^^ The Primitives: Crash] 888 00:45:35,702 --> 00:45:37,971 ^^ Here you go Way too fast ^^ 889 00:45:38,038 --> 00:45:40,507 ^^ Don't slow down, you're gonna crash ^^ 890 00:45:40,573 --> 00:45:43,610 ^^ You should watch, watch your stay here ^^ 891 00:45:43,677 --> 00:45:47,013 ^^ Don't look out, you're gonna break your neck ^^ 892 00:45:47,080 --> 00:45:50,450 ^^ Na na na na na Na na na na na ^^ 893 00:45:50,517 --> 00:45:52,352 ^^ Slow down, you're gonna crash ^^ 894 00:45:52,419 --> 00:45:55,555 ^^ Na na na na na Na na na na na ^^ 895 00:45:55,622 --> 00:45:58,258 ^^ Slow down, you're gonna crash ^^^^^^^^^^ 896 00:45:58,324 --> 00:46:00,727 [both screaming] 897 00:46:00,794 --> 00:46:03,863 [laughing] 898 00:46:08,301 --> 00:46:10,804 - Oh, my God. - Oh, God. 899 00:46:12,138 --> 00:46:15,508 I told you you'd have fun with me. 900 00:46:26,286 --> 00:46:28,655 [sneezes] 901 00:46:28,722 --> 00:46:33,993 - Sorry. - That's cool. It's okay. 902 00:46:40,867 --> 00:46:44,504 - Here you go. - Thank you. 903 00:46:45,739 --> 00:46:47,674 It's kinda my fault you got sick. 904 00:46:47,741 --> 00:46:49,242 [sniffling] It's not your fault. 905 00:46:49,309 --> 00:46:52,245 We might have gotten sick without tobogganing. 906 00:46:52,312 --> 00:46:54,814 It didn't help walking home in wet clothes. 907 00:46:54,881 --> 00:46:58,618 - You wanna watch TV? - Uh-huh. 908 00:46:58,685 --> 00:47:01,454 [Drew groaning] 909 00:47:04,891 --> 00:47:07,927 [^^ Warrant: She's My Cherry Pie] 910 00:47:27,981 --> 00:47:30,216 - Hey. - Hi. 911 00:47:34,988 --> 00:47:37,290 You look different. 912 00:47:37,357 --> 00:47:39,659 Did you do something? 913 00:47:40,894 --> 00:47:42,162 Are you serious? 914 00:47:42,228 --> 00:47:46,833 No, I just mean that, uh... 915 00:47:46,900 --> 00:47:48,335 You look good. 916 00:47:51,004 --> 00:47:52,605 Thanks. 917 00:47:53,907 --> 00:47:55,175 Where'd you go? 918 00:47:55,975 --> 00:47:57,677 Nice wheels. 919 00:47:58,878 --> 00:48:03,149 - Yeah. You like it? - Yeah. 920 00:48:04,484 --> 00:48:07,420 Does it seem at all familiar? 921 00:48:09,222 --> 00:48:11,624 Yeah. Didn't somebody we know have one of these? 922 00:48:11,691 --> 00:48:13,793 Yeah. Us. 923 00:48:14,894 --> 00:48:17,731 Maybe this'll help. 924 00:48:21,968 --> 00:48:25,438 Yeah. I remember. 925 00:48:41,254 --> 00:48:44,858 - So what's your deal anyway? - My deal. 926 00:48:44,924 --> 00:48:47,927 I mean, sometimes you have these moments of lucidity, 927 00:48:47,994 --> 00:48:50,196 but then other times 928 00:48:50,263 --> 00:48:53,400 it's just not so much normal. 929 00:48:53,466 --> 00:48:55,869 I don't understand, I mean, 930 00:48:55,935 --> 00:48:57,470 I don't wanna be alone on Christmas. 931 00:48:57,537 --> 00:48:59,172 You've never been alone on Christmas. 932 00:48:59,239 --> 00:49:02,842 On Christmas, it's not like being alone. It's alone alone. 933 00:49:02,909 --> 00:49:05,445 This wouldn't be one of those lucid moments. 934 00:49:05,512 --> 00:49:08,381 - I wasn't going for that. - Okay, I see. 935 00:49:08,448 --> 00:49:11,251 Alright, little Miss Grinch. 936 00:49:11,317 --> 00:49:13,920 I know you're a sophisticated, modern woman 937 00:49:13,987 --> 00:49:16,423 that's very jaded and nothing gets to you, 938 00:49:16,489 --> 00:49:18,291 and you have no emotions. 939 00:49:18,358 --> 00:49:20,360 But I'be willing to bet that even you, 940 00:49:20,427 --> 00:49:23,096 before you got old... 941 00:49:23,163 --> 00:49:25,065 ...-er than you are now, 942 00:49:25,131 --> 00:49:29,502 but still as young, attractive, smart and beautiful... 943 00:49:29,569 --> 00:49:31,504 [sniffling] That's better. 944 00:49:31,571 --> 00:49:32,806 I don't know, like, 945 00:49:32,872 --> 00:49:35,508 some moment in your childhood 946 00:49:35,575 --> 00:49:37,477 before everything got complicad, 947 00:49:37,544 --> 00:49:38,812 when you were happy. 948 00:49:38,878 --> 00:49:40,914 You must have some moment in your life 949 00:49:40,980 --> 00:49:44,284 that you'd like to go back and relive. 950 00:49:46,152 --> 00:49:47,887 Yeah. 951 00:49:47,954 --> 00:49:49,956 Once. 952 00:49:50,990 --> 00:49:54,928 I was, like, nine years old 953 00:49:54,994 --> 00:49:58,498 and we had just had this ice storm. 954 00:49:58,565 --> 00:50:02,469 I was walking home from school through Bishop Park. 955 00:50:02,535 --> 00:50:05,572 You know that one big oak tree in the middle? 956 00:50:05,638 --> 00:50:08,074 It was completely frozen. 957 00:50:08,141 --> 00:50:10,310 All the branches were icicles. 958 00:50:10,377 --> 00:50:13,146 It was just... It was incredible. 959 00:50:13,213 --> 00:50:16,950 It completely stopped me in my tracks. 960 00:50:17,017 --> 00:50:18,885 I just remember standing underneath it 961 00:50:18,952 --> 00:50:24,224 pretending that I was a princess in a magical crystal palace. 962 00:50:24,290 --> 00:50:25,825 It was really... 963 00:50:25,892 --> 00:50:28,695 It was beautiful. 964 00:50:30,497 --> 00:50:32,599 [blowing] 965 00:50:32,665 --> 00:50:35,735 [^^ Jose Feliciano: Feliz Navidad] 966 00:52:20,540 --> 00:52:23,209 Hey, would you come outside with me for one second? 967 00:52:23,276 --> 00:52:26,780 - I wanna show you something. - Okay. 968 00:52:26,846 --> 00:52:29,382 - Where are you taking me? - Hold on, one second. 969 00:52:29,449 --> 00:52:32,018 - You trust me? - No. 970 00:52:32,085 --> 00:52:33,319 - Not necessarily. - Okay. 971 00:52:33,386 --> 00:52:35,789 Try to trust me, I wanna blindfold you. 972 00:52:35,855 --> 00:52:37,457 - It's a surprise. - Okay. 973 00:52:37,524 --> 00:52:39,926 - Alright? - Alright. 974 00:52:39,993 --> 00:52:42,896 - Oh, God. - Alright. Follow me. 975 00:52:42,962 --> 00:52:44,731 I get the feeling this is gonna end with, 976 00:52:44,798 --> 00:52:47,767 "And she was never heard from again"? 977 00:52:47,834 --> 00:52:49,836 - Step, step, step. - Okay. 978 00:52:49,903 --> 00:52:51,371 - Right there. Stop. - Stop. Okay. 979 00:52:51,438 --> 00:52:53,640 - Turn this way. Okay? - Alright. 980 00:52:53,707 --> 00:52:55,675 Alright. 981 00:53:03,783 --> 00:53:07,020 [breathless] Oh, my God. 982 00:53:09,322 --> 00:53:12,826 [stammers] I can't believe you did this. 983 00:53:12,892 --> 00:53:16,162 Wait till you see this. Hit it, guys. 984 00:53:16,229 --> 00:53:19,099 [elves] Hut, hut, hut... 985 00:53:24,904 --> 00:53:30,110 - [elves giggling] - [camel grunts] 986 00:53:33,880 --> 00:53:36,449 [donkey hee-hawing] 987 00:53:37,250 --> 00:53:38,551 See that? 988 00:53:38,618 --> 00:53:41,121 That's you right there. I know this excellent props guy. 989 00:53:41,187 --> 00:53:43,023 He owns a prop house with figurine stuff, 990 00:53:43,089 --> 00:53:45,658 and he painted your hair like that, your mouth like that. 991 00:53:45,725 --> 00:53:47,761 - Those guys aren't even pros. - I'm sure. 992 00:53:47,827 --> 00:53:50,296 - I showed them the thing. - Oh, wow. 993 00:53:50,363 --> 00:53:53,733 I got this dance teacher. It's not easy to get a camel. 994 00:53:53,800 --> 00:53:58,104 It's not easy taking a very personal and private moment 995 00:53:58,171 --> 00:54:00,273 that I have never told anybody in my life 996 00:54:00,340 --> 00:54:01,875 and turning it into a theme park. 997 00:54:01,941 --> 00:54:03,777 ^^ We wish you a Merry Christmas ^^ 998 00:54:03,843 --> 00:54:05,211 Shut up! 999 00:54:05,278 --> 00:54:07,213 [choir] Ah... 1000 00:54:07,280 --> 00:54:10,316 But I'm not disappointed. Okay? I'm not mad. 1001 00:54:10,383 --> 00:54:11,918 I'm just mad at myself 1002 00:54:11,985 --> 00:54:15,288 for thinking that there was more to you than I thought. 1003 00:54:16,523 --> 00:54:19,192 - That's you. - [man] It's a wrap. 1004 00:54:19,259 --> 00:54:21,194 [elves] Hut, hut, hut. 1005 00:54:21,261 --> 00:54:22,962 [Drew] Alicia? Alicia, wait a second! 1006 00:54:23,029 --> 00:54:24,364 I care about you. 1007 00:54:24,431 --> 00:54:26,933 I did that because I care about you. 1008 00:54:27,000 --> 00:54:29,369 Look, Drew, let me just give you some advice. 1009 00:54:29,436 --> 00:54:31,838 Save your big, expensive stures 1010 00:54:31,905 --> 00:54:34,140 for some girl who's impressed by them. 1011 00:54:34,207 --> 00:54:36,376 And when you find her, hold on to her. 1012 00:54:36,443 --> 00:54:38,545 Otherwise, you are looking at a lifetime 1013 00:54:38,611 --> 00:54:39,913 of lonely Christmases. 1014 00:54:48,855 --> 00:54:52,392 I'm telling you, he is wonderful. 1015 00:54:52,459 --> 00:54:54,961 It's Cartier. At least he's got manners. 1016 00:54:55,028 --> 00:54:57,197 Well, I mean, he's in the neighborhood. 1017 00:54:57,263 --> 00:54:58,765 - He is? - Darling. 1018 00:54:58,832 --> 00:55:00,233 - What? - It's a day bracelet. 1019 00:55:00,300 --> 00:55:02,002 [mother] Do you like it, darling? 1020 00:55:02,068 --> 00:55:03,970 I love it. 1021 00:55:04,037 --> 00:55:05,305 You're the expert on jewelry. 1022 00:55:05,372 --> 00:55:07,507 - Are you disagreeing? - Absolutely not, dear. 1023 00:55:07,574 --> 00:55:10,010 She just got a present. Why would you pick at her now? 1024 00:55:10,076 --> 00:55:11,077 I'm not. 1025 00:55:15,048 --> 00:55:16,349 [knocking] 1026 00:55:16,416 --> 00:55:19,486 Brian, tell Drew that I had to take off. 1027 00:55:19,552 --> 00:55:21,321 There was a... 1028 00:55:25,191 --> 00:55:27,961 Holy cow. What are you looking at? 1029 00:55:28,028 --> 00:55:31,798 This is just, it's research. 1030 00:55:31,865 --> 00:55:34,067 When I was young, we didn't sit alone in our rooms 1031 00:55:34,134 --> 00:55:36,503 drooling over nude ladies on computer screens. 1032 00:55:36,569 --> 00:55:38,071 No, sir. 1033 00:55:38,138 --> 00:55:40,407 We had to go behind the barn with the dirty girl 1034 00:55:40,473 --> 00:55:44,310 and pay her a quarter so she could show us her goodies. 1035 00:55:45,545 --> 00:55:46,913 How does this work? 1036 00:55:46,980 --> 00:55:50,750 Oh, well... Here, let me... 1037 00:55:50,817 --> 00:55:53,186 [Brian] What are you into? Hot Cheerleaders, 1038 00:55:53,253 --> 00:55:54,554 Middle-Aged Hotties. 1039 00:55:54,621 --> 00:55:56,056 Now you're talkin' my language. 1040 00:55:56,122 --> 00:55:57,490 Old enough to know how it's done, 1041 00:55:57,557 --> 00:56:01,027 young enough to still want to do it. 1042 00:56:01,094 --> 00:56:03,596 - That's gross. - Ooh. 1043 00:56:03,663 --> 00:56:05,398 [Doo-Dah] Come to papa. 1044 00:56:05,465 --> 00:56:07,734 [Brian] That's not bad, right? 1045 00:56:10,737 --> 00:56:12,005 Dude, 1046 00:56:12,072 --> 00:56:13,406 it's your mom! 1047 00:56:13,473 --> 00:56:14,641 Oh, my God. 1048 00:56:16,076 --> 00:56:23,683 Hey, can you print that for me? 1049 00:56:23,750 --> 00:56:25,585 Mom, Dad, listen. 1050 00:56:25,652 --> 00:56:27,287 Please, Drew has to go tonight, okay? 1051 00:56:27,354 --> 00:56:30,190 I cannot spend one more second in this house with him. 1052 00:56:30,256 --> 00:56:32,392 - Well, yeah? - Yeah? So what? 1053 00:56:32,459 --> 00:56:34,894 So, he's making fools of us! 1054 00:56:34,961 --> 00:56:36,730 - Of all of us! - [Drew] Alicia? 1055 00:56:36,796 --> 00:56:39,632 [sighs] Alright, look, I'm gonna take the car, 1056 00:56:39,699 --> 00:56:42,068 and when I get home, I really hope he's gone. 1057 00:56:42,135 --> 00:56:45,505 - Alicia. - Be careful with the car. 1058 00:56:45,572 --> 00:56:47,340 Can't we talk about this? 1059 00:56:47,407 --> 00:56:49,442 No. 1060 00:56:52,679 --> 00:56:54,948 - What the hell happened? - [Drew] Nothing. 1061 00:56:55,015 --> 00:56:57,884 I think she's right. It's stupid. 1062 00:56:57,951 --> 00:56:59,352 This is a mistake. 1063 00:56:59,419 --> 00:57:02,422 I've imposed on you folks and I'm sorry. 1064 00:57:02,489 --> 00:57:06,826 I'll write you a check. I'll spend Christmas... 1065 00:57:06,893 --> 00:57:09,295 I'll spend Christmas somewhere. I'll figure it out. 1066 00:57:09,362 --> 00:57:13,199 No. We don't want your money. 1067 00:57:13,266 --> 00:57:17,203 In cash. Check'll be just fine. 1068 00:57:17,270 --> 00:57:19,673 - I'll get you a pen. - [phone rings] 1069 00:57:19,739 --> 00:57:21,975 - What's wrong with you? - Hello? 1070 00:57:22,042 --> 00:57:24,911 - Merry Christmas to you too. - Missy! 1071 00:57:24,978 --> 00:57:27,547 The bracelet is amazing, Drew. Thank you. 1072 00:57:27,614 --> 00:57:30,850 I'm kind of in the middle of something right now. 1073 00:57:30,917 --> 00:57:33,520 How'd you know my favorite is Cartier? 1074 00:57:33,586 --> 00:57:36,022 It's a lucky guess. How did you find me? 1075 00:57:36,089 --> 00:57:37,590 Oh, I talked to your secretary 1076 00:57:37,657 --> 00:57:40,093 and she said you were with your family. 1077 00:57:40,160 --> 00:57:41,461 Oh, Drew! 1078 00:57:41,528 --> 00:57:45,065 I am so happy for you. And for us. 1079 00:57:45,131 --> 00:57:47,133 - For us? - I know what this means, 1080 00:57:47,200 --> 00:57:49,269 reaching out to your family after all this time. 1081 00:57:49,336 --> 00:57:51,805 It means you want to be more serious about yourself, 1082 00:57:51,871 --> 00:57:54,274 and more serious about me. 1083 00:57:54,341 --> 00:57:56,609 I wanna meet your family, Drew. 1084 00:57:56,676 --> 00:57:59,446 I'm sure you will, and they wanna meet you one day. 1085 00:57:59,512 --> 00:58:01,114 Oh, great. 1086 00:58:01,181 --> 00:58:03,450 Then we can go to Fiji. 1087 00:58:03,516 --> 00:58:06,219 How about tomorrow? 1088 00:58:06,286 --> 00:58:09,189 Fiji? Tomorrow? You're kidding. 1089 00:58:09,255 --> 00:58:12,392 That's fabulous, actually. That's perfect. 1090 00:58:12,459 --> 00:58:14,127 Then tonight 1091 00:58:14,194 --> 00:58:17,397 we can spend Christmas Eve together with our families. 1092 00:58:17,464 --> 00:58:19,499 Uh, 1093 00:58:19,566 --> 00:58:22,802 that's gonna be hard to pull off, you know? 1094 00:58:22,869 --> 00:58:27,607 It's very short notice, and we... 1095 00:58:27,674 --> 00:58:33,046 One of the family members is challenged, and, 1096 00:58:33,113 --> 00:58:36,750 [clears throat] requires a lot of time to put on 1097 00:58:36,816 --> 00:58:39,619 - the proper headgear... - Oh, no problem. 1098 00:58:39,686 --> 00:58:41,388 - [seatbelts unlatching] - We're here. 1099 00:58:41,454 --> 00:58:43,857 - You're here? - Look outside! 1100 00:58:51,731 --> 00:58:54,000 Oh, my God! You're here?! 1101 00:58:55,335 --> 00:58:59,205 I mean, oh, my gosh! You're totally here! 1102 00:59:01,241 --> 00:59:02,909 My girlfriend is here with her family! 1103 00:59:02,976 --> 00:59:05,578 You have to help me! Pretend for a couple hours! 1104 00:59:05,645 --> 00:59:07,814 We'll leave by midnight. Please? I'm begging you! 1105 00:59:07,881 --> 00:59:10,183 Read paragraph three. You bailed, we're done. 1106 00:59:10,250 --> 00:59:11,985 You write the check and you get out! 1107 00:59:12,052 --> 00:59:13,787 What? No! Wait a minute! 1108 00:59:13,853 --> 00:59:16,156 Okay, look, I wanna go! I'm dying to go! 1109 00:59:16,222 --> 00:59:18,725 I gotta have a life to go back to! This girl is that life! 1110 00:59:18,792 --> 00:59:20,960 I can't tell her I rented a family. 1111 00:59:21,027 --> 00:59:23,263 I'm sure she already knows you're crazy. 1112 00:59:23,329 --> 00:59:26,433 - It kinda shows. - A deal's a deal. That's it. 1113 00:59:26,499 --> 00:59:27,934 Unless you wanna sweeten the pot. 1114 00:59:28,001 --> 00:59:29,703 That's extortion, Tom! 1115 00:59:29,769 --> 00:59:32,272 - I think I hear the doorbell. - No! No, no! Wait! 1116 00:59:32,339 --> 00:59:35,675 No, no! I'll give you another 75 grand. Okay? 1117 00:59:35,742 --> 00:59:37,811 But you gotta do it good, you gotta try, alright? 1118 00:59:37,877 --> 00:59:40,013 Or else I'll be so mad at you guys! 1119 00:59:40,080 --> 00:59:41,581 - [doorbell] - Come on. 1120 00:59:41,648 --> 00:59:44,050 - I'm not wearin' the hat. - [Drew] Fine! Sure! 1121 00:59:45,251 --> 00:59:47,587 - Missy! - Hey, Drew. 1122 00:59:47,654 --> 00:59:49,522 Mrs. Vangilder. Captain. 1123 00:59:49,589 --> 00:59:50,657 Come on in. 1124 00:59:50,724 --> 00:59:51,758 Merry Christmas. 1125 00:59:51,825 --> 00:59:53,059 Hi, honey. Merry Christmas. 1126 00:59:53,126 --> 00:59:55,195 Welcome to the childhood home of my childhood. 1127 00:59:55,261 --> 00:59:56,463 [chuckling] Come on in. 1128 00:59:56,529 --> 00:59:57,864 - Hi. - Hello. 1129 00:59:57,931 --> 01:00:00,166 I'm Drew's father, and this is his mother. 1130 01:00:00,233 --> 01:00:01,167 - Christine. - Myom. 1131 01:00:01,234 --> 01:00:02,469 Letitia. Horace. 1132 01:00:02,535 --> 01:00:05,205 And he's our son. There's no doubt about that. 1133 01:00:05,271 --> 01:00:07,374 [Drew chuckling] That's for sure. 1134 01:00:07,440 --> 01:00:09,909 [awkward silence] 1135 01:00:18,118 --> 01:00:19,619 Oh! 1136 01:00:19,686 --> 01:00:23,656 I would love to see pictures of Drew when he was small. 1137 01:00:23,723 --> 01:00:26,726 Oh, babe, we're not gonna bore everyone, that's embarrassing. 1138 01:00:26,793 --> 01:00:28,695 Good idea. Bath time for baby. 1139 01:00:28,762 --> 01:00:30,130 - Oh. - [chuckling] 1140 01:00:30,196 --> 01:00:33,133 - Thanks, Mom. - Look at him. 1141 01:00:33,199 --> 01:00:34,801 Drew, are you sure that's you? 1142 01:00:34,868 --> 01:00:37,270 Oh, that's me alright. I remember it well. 1143 01:00:37,337 --> 01:00:39,639 That picture was in autumn and the photographer... 1144 01:00:39,706 --> 01:00:43,677 No, I don't think so. There's no little dingle. 1145 01:00:43,743 --> 01:00:46,513 - Nope. - No. 1146 01:00:46,579 --> 01:00:48,515 [Drew] Right, yes... 1147 01:00:48,581 --> 01:00:49,749 - [knocking] - I'll get it. 1148 01:00:49,816 --> 01:00:51,151 No, no, no! 1149 01:00:51,217 --> 01:00:53,353 I'll get it, son. You stay right there. 1150 01:00:53,420 --> 01:00:55,422 [chuckling] Thanks, Dad. 1151 01:00:55,488 --> 01:00:57,524 - So, here we are. - Yeah. 1152 01:00:57,590 --> 01:01:01,227 So are we keeping you folks from dinner plans, or... 1153 01:01:01,294 --> 01:01:03,063 No, we don't, we don't have any plans. 1154 01:01:03,129 --> 01:01:04,864 We couldn't possibly impose. 1155 01:01:04,931 --> 01:01:06,866 [Horace] We just got here. 1156 01:01:06,933 --> 01:01:09,502 Oh, okay. Who was that, Dad? 1157 01:01:11,137 --> 01:01:12,605 Doo-Dah. 1158 01:01:12,672 --> 01:01:15,108 Doo-Dah. Doo-Dah's my grandpa. 1159 01:01:15,175 --> 01:01:17,577 - He'll tell us so stories... - I wanna meet Doo-Dah. 1160 01:01:17,644 --> 01:01:19,713 ...about the 1800s. I know you do. 1161 01:01:19,779 --> 01:01:22,082 We don't usually leave him outside in the cold. 1162 01:01:22,148 --> 01:01:24,150 We usually let him in, Dad. 1163 01:01:24,217 --> 01:01:26,219 - Let's talk one second, son. - [Drew] Okay. 1164 01:01:26,286 --> 01:01:28,154 - Don't go anywhere. - Okay. 1165 01:01:28,221 --> 01:01:30,457 There's a guy who says he's Doo-Dah's understudy. 1166 01:01:30,523 --> 01:01:33,493 - The problem is he's not white. - That's fine, just let him in. 1167 01:01:33,560 --> 01:01:35,128 They don't know he's not right. 1168 01:01:35,195 --> 01:01:37,397 - They don't know Doo-Dah! - Want me to let him in? 1169 01:01:37,464 --> 01:01:38,598 - Fine! - Please, Tom. 1170 01:01:38,665 --> 01:01:41,234 This is my grandfather, Doo-Dah. Here he is. 1171 01:01:41,301 --> 01:01:43,937 Sweet Jim Jiminy, cold corn in the mornin'! 1172 01:01:44,004 --> 01:01:45,638 Ooh. Who are you? 1173 01:01:45,705 --> 01:01:48,308 I'm Saul's understudy. I just came to help out. 1174 01:01:48,375 --> 01:01:50,010 [understudy] Feliz navidad, amigos. 1175 01:01:50,076 --> 01:01:52,879 - Is he black? - Yep. 1176 01:01:55,248 --> 01:01:57,584 I can't do it. I cannot do it. 1177 01:01:57,650 --> 01:02:01,154 My family's this close to 350. You're not gonna weasel out now! 1178 01:02:01,221 --> 01:02:03,590 Put some maple syrup on the ham. 1179 01:02:13,033 --> 01:02:14,167 - Drew? - Huh? 1180 01:02:14,234 --> 01:02:15,869 Ah! Ah! 1181 01:02:17,003 --> 01:02:19,472 I'm sorry! Oh, Jesus! 1182 01:02:19,539 --> 01:02:21,975 I'm sorry. I know I'm not supposed to be here. 1183 01:02:22,042 --> 01:02:25,011 I'm gonna leave right away. I don't want to cause problems. 1184 01:02:25,078 --> 01:02:27,781 - Drew, listen. - I'm in a bit of a jam now. 1185 01:02:27,847 --> 01:02:31,184 - Drew, Drew, wait. - What? Yes? 1186 01:02:31,251 --> 01:02:35,021 I came back here because I wanted to apologize to you. 1187 01:02:35,088 --> 01:02:38,525 Yes, the thing in the park was a bit garish and obnoxious, 1188 01:02:38,591 --> 01:02:40,260 but that's you. 1189 01:02:40,326 --> 01:02:42,328 I mean, not that you're garish and obnoxious, 1190 01:02:42,395 --> 01:02:44,664 it's just that you do things in a big way. 1191 01:02:44,731 --> 01:02:46,332 Yes, I do, I do. 1192 01:02:46,399 --> 01:02:49,002 And I'm touched. 1193 01:02:49,069 --> 01:02:52,706 - Thank you. That means... - And thank you. 1194 01:03:03,616 --> 01:03:05,985 You smell like fear. 1195 01:03:07,554 --> 01:03:09,989 There have been some developments you should... 1196 01:03:10,056 --> 01:03:11,024 I have a gift for you. 1197 01:03:11,091 --> 01:03:13,126 - I'll be right back. - Okay. 1198 01:03:16,396 --> 01:03:18,031 No! Hi! 1199 01:03:18,098 --> 01:03:19,733 [laughing] Hi, honey. 1200 01:03:19,799 --> 01:03:22,202 Your mom sent me in here to get a cheeseball. 1201 01:03:22,268 --> 01:03:26,773 - What's that? - This is a cheeseball. 1202 01:03:26,840 --> 01:03:28,775 Let's play a game where you don't come back 1203 01:03:28,842 --> 01:03:30,744 till they eat the whole cheeseball, okay? 1204 01:03:30,810 --> 01:03:32,245 [chuckling] This is so great. 1205 01:03:32,312 --> 01:03:34,647 Your family isn't what I expected, but whatever. 1206 01:03:34,714 --> 01:03:36,649 I'm just so glad you wanted to introduce me. 1207 01:03:36,716 --> 01:03:38,651 - It's all I ever wanted. - Me too. Me too. 1208 01:03:38,718 --> 01:03:40,954 - Thank you so much. - Okay. Alright. 1209 01:03:41,021 --> 01:03:42,756 Yes. I know. I love you. Okay. 1210 01:03:42,822 --> 01:03:46,726 - Fiji's gonna be great. - It will be great. Fiji time! 1211 01:03:52,265 --> 01:03:53,967 That's what this was about? 1212 01:03:54,067 --> 01:03:55,902 You put us through this for a girl? 1213 01:03:55,969 --> 01:03:58,304 No, no, no. 1214 01:03:58,371 --> 01:04:00,006 Just... 1215 01:04:01,875 --> 01:04:04,844 - Can I open my present now? - Sure. 1216 01:04:07,614 --> 01:04:10,750 I thought this was because you had a painful childhood. 1217 01:04:10,817 --> 01:04:13,253 I'm sorry. You told me you never wanted to see me again, 1218 01:04:13,319 --> 01:04:15,422 so I accepted that. 1219 01:04:15,488 --> 01:04:17,724 I was broken up with her, but she just showed up 1220 01:04:17,791 --> 01:04:19,459 and wanted to meet my family. 1221 01:04:19,526 --> 01:04:22,328 I couldn't tell them it was a rented family. 1222 01:04:22,395 --> 01:04:24,764 I know you hate me. I hate me. 1223 01:04:24,831 --> 01:04:26,332 I hate my own guts. 1224 01:04:26,399 --> 01:04:29,269 I know this is horrible to ask, but would you just please, 1225 01:04:29,336 --> 01:04:31,638 could you help me out, so I can just get through this? 1226 01:04:31,705 --> 01:04:34,641 You'll never see me again. Just take a ride for an hour. 1227 01:04:34,708 --> 01:04:36,943 Your parents will call you when the coast is clear. 1228 01:04:37,010 --> 01:04:41,214 [Christine] Drew, your dad wants more salami! 1229 01:04:41,281 --> 01:04:42,582 They're playing along? 1230 01:04:42,649 --> 01:04:47,020 Your parents, they're crazy. They think it's fun. 1231 01:04:47,087 --> 01:04:48,888 I'm sorry. Okay? I gotta go. 1232 01:04:48,955 --> 01:04:50,890 I'll see you later. I miss you. Thank you. 1233 01:04:50,957 --> 01:04:53,293 You're welcome. See ya. 1234 01:04:56,830 --> 01:04:59,499 They think it's fun, huh? 1235 01:05:01,434 --> 01:05:06,873 Maybe they're right. 1236 01:05:06,940 --> 01:05:09,542 You know, it reminds me of Mexico. 1237 01:05:09,609 --> 01:05:11,044 Not the better hotels, 1238 01:05:11,111 --> 01:05:14,080 but the colors of the simple people. 1239 01:05:14,147 --> 01:05:16,483 It's so bright and vulgar. 1240 01:05:16,549 --> 01:05:19,753 - [chuckles] - Mom! Dad! I'm home! 1241 01:05:19,819 --> 01:05:24,257 [Christine] Alicia, you're back. You're back, Alicia. 1242 01:05:24,324 --> 01:05:26,192 Oh, you're back. 1243 01:05:26,259 --> 01:05:29,596 This is our daughter, Alicia. This is Mrs.angilder. 1244 01:05:29,662 --> 01:05:31,765 Please. Letitia. 1245 01:05:31,831 --> 01:05:34,434 I'm so pleased to meet you. Really. 1246 01:05:34,501 --> 01:05:36,436 And this is our little Missy. 1247 01:05:36,503 --> 01:05:39,639 Oh, Missy, Missy. 1248 01:05:41,608 --> 01:05:45,045 Oh, gosh. I've just heard so much about you from Drew. 1249 01:05:45,111 --> 01:05:47,547 God, you're gorgeous. 1250 01:05:47,614 --> 01:05:49,215 And you are so not fat. 1251 01:05:49,282 --> 01:05:51,317 Drew! What's the matter with you? 1252 01:05:51,384 --> 01:05:53,019 I'm sorry? 1253 01:05:53,086 --> 01:05:54,954 - Drew, I'm not fat. - No. 1254 01:05:55,021 --> 01:05:58,024 - I was just thinking that. - You must be Mr. Vangilder. 1255 01:05:58,091 --> 01:06:00,226 - I would never say that. - Don't mind us. 1256 01:06:00,293 --> 01:06:01,695 We're just a bunch of kidders. 1257 01:06:01,761 --> 01:06:03,630 I like the family. 1258 01:06:03,697 --> 01:06:06,299 Oh, well, you obviously haven't met Brian. 1259 01:06:06,366 --> 01:06:09,369 By the way, where is Brian? 1260 01:06:13,473 --> 01:06:15,775 [whimpering] 1261 01:06:19,346 --> 01:06:21,548 Here. 1262 01:06:21,614 --> 01:06:24,784 I think your mom's startin' to like your grandfather hittin' on her. 1263 01:06:24,851 --> 01:06:27,587 There's a sentence you don't often hear on Christmas Eve. 1264 01:06:27,654 --> 01:06:28,788 [Missy laughing] 1265 01:06:28,855 --> 01:06:31,758 It's unbelievable. Poor thing. Poor thing. 1266 01:06:31,825 --> 01:06:33,993 - Excuse me. - It's true. 1267 01:06:34,060 --> 01:06:36,596 What's happening over here? What's going on? 1268 01:06:36,663 --> 01:06:38,465 I am learning so much from your sister. 1269 01:06:38,531 --> 01:06:40,266 Oh, you are. Great. 1270 01:06:40,333 --> 01:06:42,669 I didn't know you were a varsity baton twirler. 1271 01:06:42,736 --> 01:06:45,839 Yeah. Gave away the big secret, I guess, didn't you? 1272 01:06:45,905 --> 01:06:48,341 Oh, not the big one, so don't push me. 1273 01:06:48,408 --> 01:06:50,844 Well, let's go talk to Doo-Dah. He's telling stor... 1274 01:06:50,910 --> 01:06:52,979 I want you to see the bracelet Drew got me. 1275 01:06:53,046 --> 01:06:55,982 Ooh, Cartier, huh? 1276 01:06:56,049 --> 01:06:58,284 Wow. Look at that. That's just beautiful. 1277 01:06:58,351 --> 01:07:00,520 Well, that's my brother. 1278 01:07:00,587 --> 01:07:04,024 Just never afraid to put a price tag on his feelings. 1279 01:07:04,090 --> 01:07:05,658 Yeah. That's my sister. 1280 01:07:05,725 --> 01:07:07,327 Never understanding there's love, 1281 01:07:07,394 --> 01:07:09,863 you can care about somebody and want to show it in a big way, 1282 01:07:09,929 --> 01:07:11,698 and you shouldn't be put down and mocked, 1283 01:07:11,765 --> 01:07:13,199 and made hurt feelings. 1284 01:07:13,266 --> 01:07:15,535 He doesn't understand that when you love somebody, 1285 01:07:15,602 --> 01:07:17,270 you don't have to show it in a big way. 1286 01:07:17,337 --> 01:07:21,041 So you were slumming when you were making out with me in the kitchen? 1287 01:07:27,113 --> 01:07:29,883 It's a very, very affectionate family. 1288 01:07:29,949 --> 01:07:32,152 - We show our love. - Italians. 1289 01:07:32,218 --> 01:07:34,087 We're just very warm. 1290 01:07:34,154 --> 01:07:36,723 Red hot, even. 1291 01:07:36,790 --> 01:07:37,824 Alright, that's it. 1292 01:07:37,891 --> 01:07:40,160 Give me this. Get up. 1293 01:07:40,226 --> 01:07:41,995 - Sit down! - [Christine] Okay! 1294 01:07:42,062 --> 01:07:43,797 Who wants a tour of the house? 1295 01:07:43,863 --> 01:07:47,067 - What you're using are stairs. - [squeaking] 1296 01:07:47,133 --> 01:07:49,402 We like the for going up. 1297 01:07:49,469 --> 01:07:51,671 This is the bathroom. 1298 01:07:54,040 --> 01:07:55,208 What are you doing to me? 1299 01:07:55,275 --> 01:07:56,476 - What? - You're killing me. 1300 01:07:56,543 --> 01:07:59,379 No, I'm just playing along, brother, dear. 1301 01:07:59,446 --> 01:08:02,015 I think Missy likes me. She thinks I'm funny. 1302 01:08:02,082 --> 01:08:04,818 This was little Drew's room. Now, it's Brian's. 1303 01:08:04,884 --> 01:08:05,985 Aw. 1304 01:08:06,052 --> 01:08:08,722 Brian, don't be rude. We have guests. 1305 01:08:08,788 --> 01:08:12,192 He'd live in front of the screen if we'd let him right, Tom? 1306 01:08:12,258 --> 01:08:15,662 I guess it's that insatiable appetite for knowledge. 1307 01:08:15,729 --> 01:08:17,831 Brian, what have you done?! 1308 01:08:17,897 --> 01:08:20,934 - I don't know what that is. - I do. 1309 01:08:21,001 --> 01:08:23,103 - [Letitia] Honestly. - That's my little girl. 1310 01:08:23,169 --> 01:08:25,939 - Horace, get our coats. - What's going on? 1311 01:08:26,006 --> 01:08:28,108 You have no idea. Missy, get your coat! 1312 01:08:28,174 --> 01:08:30,310 - But there's ham! - [Missy] We're not going. 1313 01:08:30,377 --> 01:08:32,345 - We're staying. - [Christine] Lighten up. 1314 01:08:32,412 --> 01:08:35,482 It's just a picture. I had pictures taken for fun. 1315 01:08:35,548 --> 01:08:37,717 Where would you get a stupid idea like that?! 1316 01:08:40,620 --> 01:08:44,824 Coats! Someone say coats? Get the coats. Gotta get coats. 1317 01:08:46,259 --> 01:08:48,428 [Missy screams] 1318 01:08:48,495 --> 01:08:50,063 [chuckles] Oh. 1319 01:08:55,001 --> 01:08:58,171 Some things cannot be unseen. 1320 01:08:58,238 --> 01:09:00,907 Brian? Brian? 1321 01:09:00,974 --> 01:09:04,144 [Tom] Great. Just great, Christine. 1322 01:09:09,182 --> 01:09:11,685 I'll be at the Travel Lodge. 1323 01:09:13,286 --> 01:09:15,155 [door sls] 1324 01:09:19,459 --> 01:09:23,263 - Merry Christmas. - Mom? Mom? 1325 01:09:24,330 --> 01:09:26,299 - Oh, dear God. - Wait a minute! 1326 01:09:26,366 --> 01:09:28,234 There's more of Mom's Christmas buffet. 1327 01:09:28,301 --> 01:09:31,705 If you think we're staying after that display, think again. 1328 01:09:31,771 --> 01:09:34,507 [Letitia] Trollops who pose for dirty pictures, 1329 01:09:34,574 --> 01:09:37,377 various incestuous overtones 1330 01:09:37,444 --> 01:09:40,113 and old, unexplained men. 1331 01:09:40,180 --> 01:09:43,016 This is without a doubt the worst Christmas I've ever... 1332 01:09:43,083 --> 01:09:45,652 Oh, shut up, Letitia! 1333 01:09:46,720 --> 01:09:47,921 What? 1334 01:09:47,987 --> 01:09:49,556 I'll tell you what. 1335 01:09:49,622 --> 01:09:51,958 I've put up with your high and mighty act for 25 years, 1336 01:09:52,025 --> 01:09:53,393 but these people don't have to. 1337 01:09:53,460 --> 01:09:56,363 I don't remember you being so superior when you got knocked up 1338 01:09:56,429 --> 01:10:00,066 by Skippy Altsheller and then tricked me into marrying you. 1339 01:10:01,301 --> 01:10:05,071 - Oh, my God! - I'm sorry, Missy. 1340 01:10:05,138 --> 01:10:06,973 Missy darling, it's not true. 1341 01:10:07,040 --> 01:10:09,442 You were premature. 1342 01:10:09,509 --> 01:10:11,945 Oh, come on, Letitia! 1343 01:10:12,012 --> 01:10:13,513 Tell your mother thanks, Drew. 1344 01:10:13,580 --> 01:10:16,416 And, Merry Christmas. 1345 01:10:17,851 --> 01:10:20,253 Missy, we'll wait for you in the car. 1346 01:10:20,320 --> 01:10:23,690 [grunts] You know, really. 1347 01:10:25,191 --> 01:10:27,293 Yuletide's a bitch, ain't it? 1348 01:10:27,360 --> 01:10:29,629 Oh, shut up! Just shut up! 1349 01:10:29,696 --> 01:10:32,098 Okay! Fiji. 1350 01:10:32,165 --> 01:10:33,500 Let's go to Fiji right now. 1351 01:10:33,566 --> 01:10:36,236 You're right, Drew. Just screw family. 1352 01:10:36,302 --> 01:10:39,205 All we need is each other. Just take me away. 1353 01:10:40,940 --> 01:10:43,443 I'm sorry, Missy. I can't. 1354 01:10:43,510 --> 01:10:47,514 Just go home, okay? I'm sorry about all this. 1355 01:10:48,982 --> 01:10:51,084 I'll spend Christmas alone. 1356 01:10:55,955 --> 01:10:58,725 Oh, fine. 1357 01:10:58,792 --> 01:11:00,393 [sobbing] Okay. 1358 01:11:01,561 --> 01:11:04,197 Well, then, 1359 01:11:04,264 --> 01:11:07,400 the only thing I have left to say to you 1360 01:11:07,467 --> 01:11:09,569 is I am keeping this bracelet. 1361 01:11:13,406 --> 01:11:16,376 I feel bad drinking liquor you're gonna need. 1362 01:11:16,443 --> 01:11:17,844 I better go. 1363 01:11:17,911 --> 01:11:21,014 - Merry Christmas. - Alright. 1364 01:11:22,615 --> 01:11:24,451 [Letitia] Missy, get in the car! 1365 01:11:24,517 --> 01:11:26,319 My God! 1366 01:11:26,386 --> 01:11:30,590 Have you lost your mind? Did you just lose it in there? 1367 01:11:40,166 --> 01:11:42,268 You know, I have to ask, 1368 01:11:42,335 --> 01:11:44,404 just how bad is your real family 1369 01:11:44,471 --> 01:11:47,707 that you would rather spend your Christmas like this? 1370 01:11:58,051 --> 01:12:02,055 There was no real family. 1371 01:12:03,523 --> 01:12:06,226 What do you mean, "there is no family"? 1372 01:12:06,292 --> 01:12:07,861 Come on, you must've had a family. 1373 01:12:07,927 --> 01:12:10,830 I mean, you must've had a Doo-Dah, right? 1374 01:12:10,897 --> 01:12:14,267 I had a frie whose grandfather, 1375 01:12:14,334 --> 01:12:17,404 was called Doo-Dah. I always liked that. 1376 01:12:18,805 --> 01:12:23,410 My dad walked out on us on Christmas 1377 01:12:23,476 --> 01:12:25,111 when I was four. 1378 01:12:25,178 --> 01:12:27,614 It was basically just me and my mom. 1379 01:12:27,681 --> 01:12:33,753 She was a waitress at the 24-hour coffee shop. 1380 01:12:33,820 --> 01:12:38,358 She didn't have a lot of money, so when Christmas came around, 1381 01:12:38,425 --> 01:12:42,996 it was an opportunity for her to take a double shift. She did. 1382 01:12:43,063 --> 01:12:46,132 And, you know, 1383 01:12:46,199 --> 01:12:47,534 my Christmases were, 1384 01:12:47,600 --> 01:12:52,105 basically, I just, kind of, sat around the house, you know? 1385 01:12:52,172 --> 01:12:54,407 Then at night, I'd walk down there, 1386 01:12:54,474 --> 01:12:58,912 and Mom would always buy me a grown-up stack of pancakes, 1387 01:12:58,978 --> 01:13:02,515 and I would sit by myself at the end of the counter 1388 01:13:02,582 --> 01:13:04,184 and eat 'em. 1389 01:13:04,250 --> 01:13:07,821 I did that for@ hristmas every year 1390 01:13:07,887 --> 01:13:09,489 until I turned 18. 1391 01:13:09,556 --> 01:13:12,559 I haven't been able to walk in a coffee shop since, though. 1392 01:13:12,625 --> 01:13:14,427 Where's your mom now? 1393 01:13:14,494 --> 01:13:17,664 Mom died when I was in college. 1394 01:13:19,132 --> 01:13:20,967 I'm sorry. 1395 01:13:22,836 --> 01:13:24,137 [Alicia] Y know what, Drew? 1396 01:13:24,204 --> 01:13:28,141 There's nothing that you can do about those Christmases. 1397 01:13:28,208 --> 01:13:30,777 But the one that you can do something about, 1398 01:13:30,844 --> 01:13:32,078 the one that's here and now, 1399 01:13:32,145 --> 01:13:36,016 you just spent that destroying my family. 1400 01:13:36,082 --> 01:13:38,985 Alicia, just for the record, 1401 01:13:39,052 --> 01:13:41,287 I didn't destroy your family. 1402 01:13:41,354 --> 01:13:43,456 What are you talking about? 1403 01:13:43,523 --> 01:13:46,059 Your parents are splitting up. 1404 01:13:46,126 --> 01:13:48,528 It's obvious. Brian knows it. 1405 01:13:48,595 --> 01:13:52,599 That's why he spends all his time on his computer. 1406 01:13:52,665 --> 01:13:54,167 You just didn't wanna see it. 1407 01:13:54,234 --> 01:13:55,935 I can understand that. 1408 01:13:57,237 --> 01:13:59,272 I'm gonna go get my dad. 1409 01:13:59,339 --> 01:14:00,874 Lock up when you leave. 1410 01:14:23,596 --> 01:14:26,232 Well, alright. 1411 01:15:03,103 --> 01:15:04,804 I forgive you. 1412 01:16:26,086 --> 01:16:28,822 No! No, Spirit! No! 1413 01:16:28,888 --> 01:16:30,857 I will honor Christmas in my heart 1414 01:16:30,924 --> 01:16:32,992 and try to keep it all the year. 1415 01:16:33,059 --> 01:16:35,362 [knocking] 1416 01:16:35,428 --> 01:16:37,697 No one's home! 1417 01:16:37,764 --> 01:16:39,132 [knocking] 1418 01:16:39,199 --> 01:16:40,700 [groans] 1419 01:16:42,736 --> 01:16:44,104 What? 1420 01:16:44,170 --> 01:16:45,572 [knocking] 1421 01:16:45,638 --> 01:16:47,540 I hear you. 1422 01:16:49,843 --> 01:16:52,912 - Are you gonna hit me? - No. 1423 01:16:52,979 --> 01:16:55,548 Are you gonna do something else that still hurts? 1424 01:16:56,950 --> 01:16:59,819 No. You gonna invite me in? 1425 01:16:59,886 --> 01:17:02,188 Really? You just stopped by to hang out and catch up? 1426 01:17:02,255 --> 01:17:05,525 - Reminisce? - You owe me money. 1427 01:17:06,893 --> 01:17:09,529 Right. The money. 1428 01:17:09,596 --> 01:17:12,532 Okay, come on in. I'll get my checkbook. 1429 01:17:25,578 --> 01:17:29,683 You rented my place when you could've been staying here? 1430 01:17:33,553 --> 01:17:36,456 Well, I gotta admit, this is nice. 1431 01:17:36,523 --> 01:17:37,891 Thanks. 1432 01:17:39,159 --> 01:17:42,095 You still splitting up with Christine? 1433 01:17:42,162 --> 01:17:45,398 [Tom] Yeah. I guess. 1434 01:17:46,666 --> 01:17:49,002 That would be a shame. 1435 01:17:49,069 --> 01:17:50,670 [laughs] 1436 01:17:51,638 --> 01:17:53,573 What are you laughing at? 1437 01:17:53,640 --> 01:17:57,510 Nothing. It's just ironic. 1438 01:17:57,577 --> 01:18:00,046 I paid all that money to be part of your family. 1439 01:18:00,113 --> 01:18:02,882 You're giving it away for nothing. 1440 01:18:04,851 --> 01:18:06,086 [Drew] Look at this. 1441 01:18:06,152 --> 01:18:08,955 That's the ticket to Doo-Dah's play. 1442 01:18:09,022 --> 01:18:10,924 Yeah. I got mine too. 1443 01:18:21,634 --> 01:18:23,937 [Tom] I'm not very good at apologizing. 1444 01:18:24,004 --> 01:18:25,505 I don't know if they're in there. 1445 01:18:25,572 --> 01:18:27,540 [Drew] Come on, Tom. What do you have to lose? 1446 01:18:31,177 --> 01:18:33,279 [Doo-Dah] What do you want with me? 1447 01:18:33,346 --> 01:18:35,148 [Marley] Much. 1448 01:18:35,215 --> 01:18:36,816 [Doo-Dah] Who are you? 1449 01:18:36,883 --> 01:18:39,486 In life, I was your partner... 1450 01:18:39,552 --> 01:18:40,720 See anybody? 1451 01:18:40,787 --> 01:18:42,722 That's Doo-Dah right there. 1452 01:18:42,789 --> 01:18:44,657 What is the reason for this visit? 1453 01:18:44,724 --> 01:18:47,327 It is getting late and I've been hard at work. 1454 01:18:47,394 --> 01:18:48,762 He's not that bad, actually. 1455 01:18:48,828 --> 01:18:50,663 [Marley] To warn you, Ebenezer Scrooge. 1456 01:18:50,730 --> 01:18:52,866 He's not that good either. 1457 01:18:52,932 --> 01:18:54,868 I'm gonna find Christine. 1458 01:18:54,934 --> 01:18:57,871 [Marley] Learn from me. 1459 01:19:00,006 --> 01:19:03,576 My spirit never walked beyond our counting house. 1460 01:19:03,643 --> 01:19:10,150 It never roved beyond our money-changing hole. 1461 01:19:10,216 --> 01:19:12,385 So I am condemned 1462 01:19:12,452 --> 01:19:15,422 to wander through the world 1463 01:19:15,488 --> 01:19:18,558 to see what I might have shared on Earth, 1464 01:19:18,625 --> 01:19:21,961 then turned to happiness. 1465 01:19:23,596 --> 01:19:25,098 What are you doing here? 1466 01:19:25,165 --> 01:19:27,667 [Doo-Dah] You were always a good businessman. 1467 01:19:27,734 --> 01:19:30,270 Doo-Dah's family, right? 1468 01:19:33,006 --> 01:19:35,742 Brian. It's me, move over. 1469 01:19:35,809 --> 01:19:39,212 No, man. Go find one of the oer empty seats. 1470 01:19:39,279 --> 01:19:41,481 Move over, Bri. Come on. 1471 01:19:47,487 --> 01:19:48,621 Where's your sister? 1472 01:19:48,688 --> 01:19:50,056 [both] Shh. 1473 01:19:51,725 --> 01:19:54,494 - Dear Brother! - Fanny! 1474 01:19:54,561 --> 01:19:57,197 Chriine... 1475 01:19:59,099 --> 01:20:02,435 If I were to leave, I wouldn't even know where to go. 1476 01:20:03,403 --> 01:20:06,473 Then why leave? 1477 01:20:06,539 --> 01:20:08,842 That's what I'm sayin'. I don't wanna leave. 1478 01:20:08,908 --> 01:20:11,044 Then don't. 1479 01:20:13,747 --> 01:20:16,983 - Alright, I won't. - Okay. 1480 01:20:18,485 --> 01:20:21,488 - Ishat alright? - Yeah. 1481 01:20:21,554 --> 01:20:23,556 It's good. 1482 01:20:30,697 --> 01:20:35,735 Bri, that girl, she's kinda cute for you. 1483 01:20:35,802 --> 01:20:37,404 - You should talk to her. - Stop it. 1484 01:20:37,470 --> 01:20:40,607 - She's gonna hear. - I saw you looking at her. 1485 01:20:40,674 --> 01:20:42,509 - Please stop. - I can tell you like... 1486 01:20:42,575 --> 01:20:44,110 I can hear you. 1487 01:20:45,412 --> 01:20:47,614 [chuckling] 1488 01:20:47,681 --> 01:20:49,015 That's embarrassing. 1489 01:20:50,183 --> 01:20:53,319 That's our grandfather. This is Brian. 1490 01:20:53,386 --> 01:20:55,655 There, Brian. You're all set. 1491 01:21:00,860 --> 01:21:02,495 I'm sorry. 1492 01:21:03,663 --> 01:21:05,265 Is that your brother? 1493 01:21:06,766 --> 01:21:09,235 Yeah. 1494 01:21:09,302 --> 01:21:11,838 How do we travel exactly? 1495 01:21:11,905 --> 01:21:15,442 Through the air. We fly! 1496 01:21:16,176 --> 01:21:17,277 Not so hard! 1497 01:21:17,344 --> 01:21:19,512 - Wedgie! Wedgie! - [people laughing] 1498 01:21:39,632 --> 01:21:42,268 [Drew] Alicia? 1499 01:21:42,335 --> 01:21:45,105 - Hey. - Hey. 1500 01:21:45,171 --> 01:21:48,108 Were you in there the whole time? 1501 01:21:48,174 --> 01:21:50,910 No. I was just here to pick up my mom. 1502 01:21:52,412 --> 01:21:56,916 She's in there with your dad. 1503 01:21:56,983 --> 01:22:00,186 They're kinda making out in the third row. 1504 01:22:00,253 --> 01:22:02,589 - Really? - Yeah. 1505 01:22:03,790 --> 01:22:05,959 - That's good. - Look. 1506 01:22:06,026 --> 01:22:09,896 I don't pect you to want to talk to me or anything, 1507 01:22:09,963 --> 01:22:14,834 so I'm not gonna bother you and give you a hard time, 1508 01:22:14,901 --> 01:22:18,438 camp outside your place and stalk you and you know. 1509 01:22:18,505 --> 01:22:20,540 But I do want to say that I'm sorry 1510 01:22:20,607 --> 01:22:24,177 for what I put you through 1511 01:22:24,244 --> 01:22:26,346 and say thank you. 1512 01:22:36,423 --> 01:22:38,358 So who are you renting for New Year'sa 1513 01:22:38,425 --> 01:22:41,795 'cause you know, us Valcos, we book up kind of fast. 1514 01:22:41,861 --> 01:22:43,797 [Drew] I see that. 1515 01:22:43,863 --> 01:22:46,700 And I'd get on it, if I were you. 1516 01:22:46,766 --> 01:22:50,737 I'm lookin' for a family with maybe a bearded, 1517 01:22:50,804 --> 01:22:54,441 irascible dad with a heart of gold. 1518 01:22:54,507 --> 01:23:00,980 A brother who stays in his room all the time by himself, 1519 01:23:01,047 --> 01:23:05,352 and a sister who is... 1520 01:23:08,021 --> 01:23:11,391 ...wonderful and smart, 1521 01:23:12,359 --> 01:23:15,395 and really beautiful. 1522 01:23:15,462 --> 01:23:21,201 Because I think that's the kind of person 1523 01:23:21,267 --> 01:23:25,271 that I could fall in love with. 1524 01:23:25,338 --> 01:23:29,242 You know anybody like that? I know it's tough. 1525 01:23:29,309 --> 01:23:30,477 Let me think. 1526 01:23:30,543 --> 01:23:32,679 Not offhand, but I'll get back to you on that. 1527 01:23:32,746 --> 01:23:34,681 Let me know. 1528 01:23:34,748 --> 01:23:37,751 [^^ Judy Garland: Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas] 1529 01:23:37,817 --> 01:23:41,921 ^^ Have yourself a merry little Christmas ^^ 1530 01:23:41,988 --> 01:23:47,260 ^^ Let your heart be light ^^ 1531 01:23:49,896 --> 01:23:53,933 - [Horace] I hear you, dear. - [Missy] Daddy, stop the car! 1532 01:23:54,701 --> 01:23:56,136 Oh, my God! 1533 01:23:57,037 --> 01:23:59,906 Oh, my God! 1534 01:23:59,973 --> 01:24:01,408 He's kissing his sister. 1535 01:24:02,709 --> 01:24:04,244 [Letitia] That is open-mouth. 1536 01:24:04,310 --> 01:24:06,813 - 'Tis the season to be jolly. - [Letitia] Get us out! 1537 01:24:06,880 --> 01:24:08,982 [Horace] Maybe they're just tryin' to keep warm. 1538 01:24:09,049 --> 01:24:11,818 [Letitia] Let's get out of here! Come on! 1539 01:24:17,057 --> 01:24:22,529 ^^ So have yourself ^^ 1540 01:24:22,595 --> 01:24:29,269 ^^ A merry little Christmas ^^ 1541 01:24:29,336 --> 01:24:35,308 ^^ Night ^^^^^^^^^^