1
00:00:24,984 --> 00:00:28,279
Take out the papers
and the trash
2
00:00:28,363 --> 00:00:32,033
Or you don't get
no spendin' cash
3
00:00:32,117 --> 00:00:35,912
If you don't scrub
that kitchen floor
4
00:00:35,995 --> 00:00:38,331
You ain't gonna
rock and roll no more
5
00:00:38,415 --> 00:00:40,041
Yakety yak Don't talk back
6
00:00:40,125 --> 00:00:43,878
Just finish
cleanin' up your room
7
00:00:43,962 --> 00:00:47,799
Let's see that dust fly
with that broom
8
00:00:47,882 --> 00:00:51,511
Get all that garbage
out of sight
9
00:00:51,594 --> 00:00:53,847
Or you don't go out Friday night
10
00:00:53,930 --> 00:00:55,724
Yakety yak Don't talk back
11
00:00:55,807 --> 00:00:59,477
You just put on
your coat and hat
12
00:00:59,561 --> 00:01:03,356
And walk yourself
to the Laundromat
13
00:01:03,440 --> 00:01:07,277
And when you'νe finished
doing that
14
00:01:07,360 --> 00:01:09,446
Bring in the dog
and put out the cat
15
00:01:09,529 --> 00:01:11,489
Yakety yak Don't talk back
16
00:01:26,838 --> 00:01:30,425
You just put on
your coat and hat
17
00:01:30,508 --> 00:01:34,512
And walk yourself
to the Laundromat
18
00:01:34,596 --> 00:01:38,266
And when you'νe finished
doing that
19
00:01:38,349 --> 00:01:40,518
Bring in the dog
and put out the cat
20
00:01:40,602 --> 00:01:43,396
Yakety yak Don't talk back
21
00:01:58,119 --> 00:02:01,539
Yakety yak, yakety yak
22
00:02:02,081 --> 00:02:05,376
Yakety yak, yakety yak
23
00:02:05,877 --> 00:02:09,172
Yakety yak, yakety yak
24
00:02:10,381 --> 00:02:11,841
You messed up the words, Ben.
25
00:02:11,966 --> 00:02:13,802
- No.
- You messed up the words twice.
26
00:02:13,885 --> 00:02:17,263
It hasn't changed.
27
00:02:17,347 --> 00:02:21,059
God, I would've thought
they made some improvements or something.
28
00:02:21,351 --> 00:02:22,477
Come on, everybody.
29
00:02:22,560 --> 00:02:23,770
Hey.
30
00:02:23,853 --> 00:02:25,063
Our Lady of Victory...
31
00:02:25,146 --> 00:02:27,273
- Pray for us. Break!
- Let's go.
32
00:02:29,609 --> 00:02:31,486
Watch the doors.
33
00:02:31,569 --> 00:02:33,571
Whoa!
Trees in the parking lot.
34
00:02:37,075 --> 00:02:41,079
Nature all around us, boys.
35
00:02:41,162 --> 00:02:44,415
Take it in. Take it all in.
36
00:02:48,586 --> 00:02:50,296
I'm gonna go check us in.
37
00:02:51,047 --> 00:02:52,590
This is great.
38
00:03:06,604 --> 00:03:09,524
Well? Is this a real
North Woods lodge or what?
39
00:03:09,607 --> 00:03:11,317
Great.
40
00:03:12,026 --> 00:03:14,195
Check out the shotgun lamp.
41
00:03:14,279 --> 00:03:17,949
Isn't that something, huh?
You don't see that every day.
42
00:03:19,325 --> 00:03:20,535
Hey.
43
00:03:21,786 --> 00:03:24,289
Hello! Hello! Anybody home?
44
00:03:24,414 --> 00:03:25,707
Looks the same, doesn't it?
45
00:03:25,790 --> 00:03:28,751
Doesn't it?
Smells the same too.
46
00:03:28,835 --> 00:03:30,795
Yeah, it does. Hello!
47
00:03:32,380 --> 00:03:33,774
I wonder if they have
a lot of check-ins.
48
00:03:33,798 --> 00:03:35,174
What's this?
What's this over here?
49
00:03:35,258 --> 00:03:37,176
"For prompt service, blow me".
50
00:03:38,636 --> 00:03:40,763
It's an interesting touch.
It's charming.
51
00:03:42,140 --> 00:03:43,182
- Blow it.
- Shall I?
52
00:03:43,266 --> 00:03:44,517
Go ahead.
53
00:03:51,149 --> 00:03:53,276
Yeah!
54
00:03:56,654 --> 00:03:57,822
Whoo. Jeez!
55
00:03:59,741 --> 00:04:02,368
Folks, don't mind Wormer.
She hates people.
56
00:04:02,452 --> 00:04:05,538
Wormer, shut the frig up.
What can I do you for?
57
00:04:06,331 --> 00:04:08,750
What happened to that...
That dog's face?
58
00:04:08,833 --> 00:04:12,045
Porcupine quills.
Loves porcupines, hates people.
59
00:04:12,128 --> 00:04:15,465
She's in heat too.
Too bad you're not a dog.
60
00:04:15,548 --> 00:04:16,758
What can I do you for?
61
00:04:25,725 --> 00:04:27,936
Wally, your dog
ever had a bath before?
62
00:04:29,228 --> 00:04:33,107
There she is.
That's a gorgeous cabin.
63
00:04:33,191 --> 00:04:36,611
Okay, hold it, hold it!
That's good enough. Hey!
64
00:04:36,778 --> 00:04:39,364
Honey, that's bigger
than our honeymoon cabin.
65
00:04:39,447 --> 00:04:43,409
You city-dwelling fools
are damn lucky to have this cabin.
66
00:04:43,493 --> 00:04:45,745
It just became available
yesterday.
67
00:04:45,828 --> 00:04:47,622
We call it the Loon's Nest.
68
00:04:47,705 --> 00:04:49,582
You know what a loon is,
noodlehead?
69
00:04:49,666 --> 00:04:52,043
- Yeah, we have one in our family.
- Hey, hey, hey.
70
00:04:52,210 --> 00:04:54,188
We had a fishing party
in there up until yesterday.
71
00:04:54,212 --> 00:04:57,882
They caught their limit, and then blew.
It's all redecorated inside.
72
00:04:57,966 --> 00:04:59,092
Every bit of it.
73
00:04:59,175 --> 00:05:01,302
Me and Wally sunk
over 300 bucks into it.
74
00:05:01,386 --> 00:05:03,763
And that's not counting
what we spent on Lysol.
75
00:05:03,846 --> 00:05:05,682
- Is that right?
- It's beautiful.
76
00:05:05,765 --> 00:05:07,892
Now, you folks enjoy your stay.
77
00:05:07,976 --> 00:05:09,102
Yeah, thanks.
78
00:05:09,185 --> 00:05:11,538
Thank you very much.
How could you not in a place like this?
79
00:05:11,562 --> 00:05:14,107
You could get the shits
from the well water.
80
00:05:14,482 --> 00:05:16,359
- What did he say?
- I missed it.
81
00:05:43,511 --> 00:05:45,263
What a gas!
82
00:05:45,346 --> 00:05:48,266
Chet's gonna shit a solid-gold brick!
What a great surprise!
83
00:05:49,642 --> 00:05:51,853
I'll go see where
he's bivouacked the family.
84
00:05:51,936 --> 00:05:54,647
This is very unfair, Roman.
85
00:05:54,939 --> 00:05:57,859
What the hell are you talking about?
We're a family, for crying out loud!
86
00:05:57,942 --> 00:06:01,195
How many times have we invited Chet and
Connie to the islands with us? A dozen?
87
00:06:01,279 --> 00:06:03,531
This is a little different.
We weren't invited.
88
00:06:03,614 --> 00:06:05,616
They'll be tickled
to death to see us.
89
00:06:05,700 --> 00:06:09,704
Honey, I found out
what was stinking up the shower.
90
00:06:09,787 --> 00:06:12,582
A present from me to you.
91
00:06:14,125 --> 00:06:15,585
How thoughtful.
That's really nice.
92
00:06:15,668 --> 00:06:17,712
Put it in there
with all the others.
93
00:06:18,129 --> 00:06:20,673
There's fish all over this house.
Look, a pink one.
94
00:06:20,757 --> 00:06:24,260
All right, let's leave
this stuff right here, okay?
95
00:06:24,469 --> 00:06:27,138
You put your bathing suit on,
and we'll go down to the lake.
96
00:06:27,221 --> 00:06:30,975
No, no, you go ahead.
I really just can't seem to relax in filth.
97
00:06:31,142 --> 00:06:33,787
Come on. We'll all pitch in later
and clean this up, all right? Let's go.
98
00:06:33,811 --> 00:06:35,289
You know, we can't
even use the bathroom
99
00:06:35,313 --> 00:06:36,981
until someone
finds the toilet seat?
100
00:06:37,065 --> 00:06:38,959
Buck already found the toilet seat.
It was on the sun porch.
101
00:06:38,983 --> 00:06:40,151
- Sun porch?
- Yeah.
102
00:06:40,234 --> 00:06:41,295
Makes you wonder, doesn't it?
103
00:06:41,319 --> 00:06:42,839
Come on, no further excuses,
all right?
104
00:06:42,904 --> 00:06:44,423
- What are you doing?
- I don't know. I don't know.
105
00:06:44,447 --> 00:06:46,467
- Stop it, Chet.
- You know, the kids are at the lake.
106
00:06:46,491 --> 00:06:48,927
- Come on, Chet, stop. What are you doing?
- I'm not doing anything.
107
00:06:48,951 --> 00:06:50,620
Honey, honey, honey, no!
108
00:06:50,703 --> 00:06:53,539
Well, we got the house to ourselves.
Hello.
109
00:06:53,664 --> 00:06:56,167
Oh, no! What happened?
I'm sorry.
110
00:06:56,250 --> 00:06:57,811
- I'm so sorry.
- I just don't feel like this.
111
00:06:57,835 --> 00:07:00,296
Can you understand that?
I'm tired, I'm stinky.
112
00:07:00,379 --> 00:07:02,006
- Come on.
- What are you doing? Come on.
113
00:07:02,090 --> 00:07:03,233
Come on.
We're at the house by ourselves.
114
00:07:03,257 --> 00:07:04,318
- What about the kids?
- I don't care!
115
00:07:04,342 --> 00:07:05,986
What about the kids?
They're down at the lake.
116
00:07:06,010 --> 00:07:08,596
Don't do this here.
Let's go to the bedroom.
117
00:07:08,679 --> 00:07:12,850
Why? That's the great thing
about being in the North Woods, Connie.
118
00:07:12,934 --> 00:07:14,644
What are you feeding me now?
119
00:07:14,727 --> 00:07:15,770
Come on!
120
00:07:15,853 --> 00:07:17,522
You can run around here
naked as a bear
121
00:07:17,605 --> 00:07:19,273
and not worry
about running into anybody.
122
00:07:19,357 --> 00:07:21,025
- Is that right?
- Yes.
123
00:07:22,235 --> 00:07:23,361
Really?
124
00:07:23,444 --> 00:07:28,157
You think it's possible that
we could play fashion parade? Please.
125
00:07:28,241 --> 00:07:30,618
- I don't wanna play fashion parade.
- Why?
126
00:07:30,701 --> 00:07:32,912
You get to wear
the good outfits!
127
00:07:32,995 --> 00:07:35,015
- Oh, no, I'll let you wear them.
- You will?
128
00:07:35,039 --> 00:07:37,625
Now, you will be Shelana!
129
00:07:37,708 --> 00:07:40,753
Shelana, the oak tree woman.
130
00:07:40,837 --> 00:07:43,005
I love it when
I'm the oak tree woman!
131
00:07:43,089 --> 00:07:44,298
Temptress of the woods.
132
00:07:44,382 --> 00:07:46,050
- Yes! Yes!
- Yes!
133
00:07:46,134 --> 00:07:48,511
And I will be Burt.
134
00:07:48,594 --> 00:07:50,096
- Burt.
- A guy named Burt.
135
00:07:51,389 --> 00:07:53,408
I love it when you're Burt.
You're always...
136
00:07:53,432 --> 00:07:57,311
Or I could be
Smokey's cousin, Horny.
137
00:07:57,395 --> 00:08:00,148
- He has endurance.
- Yes, he does.
138
00:08:02,358 --> 00:08:03,901
Anybody home?
139
00:08:07,488 --> 00:08:09,615
Shelana the woods temptress?
140
00:08:09,699 --> 00:08:12,410
With Horny the Bear,
Smokey's cousin?
141
00:08:13,995 --> 00:08:16,164
Okay, okay.
142
00:08:16,247 --> 00:08:19,375
- Turn that off. Turn it off.
- Oh yeah. No, no, Chester, you said it.
143
00:08:19,625 --> 00:08:21,002
Do it on the floor.
144
00:08:22,295 --> 00:08:24,338
Beautiful stuff.
Hey, that's all right.
145
00:08:24,422 --> 00:08:25,844
Game playing, role playing.
146
00:08:25,845 --> 00:08:28,467
Helps in a marriage
after a little while, you know?
147
00:08:28,551 --> 00:08:30,595
Turn the damn thing off!
Turn it off.
148
00:08:32,180 --> 00:08:36,267
That was quite a surprise. I mean...
149
00:08:37,101 --> 00:08:38,352
You got me.
150
00:08:40,104 --> 00:08:42,523
And the whole week you'll be here!
151
00:08:43,941 --> 00:08:45,193
Okay.
152
00:08:45,693 --> 00:08:48,946
Just something.
153
00:08:49,363 --> 00:08:51,908
So, anyway,
you're an intelligent man.
154
00:08:52,283 --> 00:08:53,534
Thank you.
155
00:08:53,868 --> 00:08:55,870
- You make a good living.
- Not bad.
156
00:08:55,953 --> 00:08:57,914
- You got a good life.
- Pretty good.
157
00:08:57,997 --> 00:08:59,624
- Answer me one question.
- Sure.
158
00:08:59,707 --> 00:09:00,893
Why the hell would you want
to come up to
159
00:09:00,917 --> 00:09:05,129
a plant-infested no-man's-land like this
and live like a barbarian for a week?
160
00:09:05,713 --> 00:09:07,423
You wouldn't understand.
161
00:09:07,590 --> 00:09:08,966
Try me.
162
00:09:10,384 --> 00:09:13,094
I have great memories of this country
when I was a kid, you know,
163
00:09:13,095 --> 00:09:14,805
and I used to come up here
with my dad
164
00:09:14,889 --> 00:09:17,391
and I want the boys
to have the same memories.
165
00:09:17,475 --> 00:09:18,772
Look around you, Roman!
166
00:09:18,773 --> 00:09:21,479
For God sakes, this is
beautiful country here!
167
00:09:21,562 --> 00:09:23,439
Take a good look.
168
00:09:23,564 --> 00:09:26,901
I'll tell you what I see when
I look out there, if you wanna know.
169
00:09:26,984 --> 00:09:29,195
Yeah, I'm curious.
170
00:09:29,320 --> 00:09:32,615
I see the underdeveloped resources of
Northern Minnesota, Wisconsin and Michigan.
171
00:09:32,698 --> 00:09:34,408
I see a syndicated
development consortium
172
00:09:34,492 --> 00:09:37,161
exploiting over a billion and a
half dollars in forest products.
173
00:09:37,245 --> 00:09:40,998
I see a paper mill, and, if the strategic
metals are there, a mining operation.
174
00:09:41,082 --> 00:09:44,585
A green belt between the condos on the lake
and a waste management facility
175
00:09:44,669 --> 00:09:48,089
focusing on the newest rage
in toxic waste, medical refuse,
176
00:09:48,172 --> 00:09:51,217
infected bandages, body parts,
IV tubing, contaminated glassware,
177
00:09:51,300 --> 00:09:54,387
entrails, syringes, fluid, blood,
low-grade radioactive wastes,
178
00:09:54,470 --> 00:09:57,723
all safely contained, sunken
in the lake and sealed for centuries.
179
00:09:57,807 --> 00:10:01,060
Now, I ask you.
What do you see?
180
00:10:04,730 --> 00:10:08,234
I just see...
I see trees.
181
00:10:09,360 --> 00:10:11,734
Well, no one ever accused you
of having a grand vision.
182
00:10:11,735 --> 00:10:12,321
Nope.
183
00:10:12,405 --> 00:10:13,587
Maybe it's all for the best.
184
00:10:13,588 --> 00:10:15,783
While the ambitious scramble
for wealth and power,
185
00:10:15,866 --> 00:10:18,011
the Chet Ripley's of the world
are just able to lay back
186
00:10:18,035 --> 00:10:21,205
and casually stroll
along life's path.
187
00:10:21,872 --> 00:10:23,916
- I mean that as a compliment.
- Thanks.
188
00:10:24,000 --> 00:10:25,185
The rest of us
are all probably gonna die
189
00:10:25,209 --> 00:10:27,878
of heart attacks
and strokes long before you.
190
00:10:28,212 --> 00:10:30,798
I hope so.
Wouldn't that be great?
191
00:10:30,881 --> 00:10:33,843
Gee, just to see a bunch
of people drop that you hate.
192
00:10:33,926 --> 00:10:36,554
That would be something else,
I'm telling you.
193
00:10:37,013 --> 00:10:39,390
My goodness!
My goodness me!
194
00:10:39,765 --> 00:10:41,600
I'm gonna walk down
life's path right now.
195
00:10:41,684 --> 00:10:44,520
Get the barbecue going,
get some hot dogs on there.
196
00:10:44,603 --> 00:10:47,606
Wait a minute. No way.
Wait a hot-shit minute.
197
00:10:47,690 --> 00:10:50,985
Rule one, no relative of mine
is gonna eat hot dogs
198
00:10:51,068 --> 00:10:54,280
as long as he's sharing
my cabin. Katie!
199
00:10:55,197 --> 00:10:58,993
Do you sense the presence
of an alien life form?
200
00:10:59,493 --> 00:11:01,888
Now that you mention it, I do kind of
sense something kind of strange.
201
00:11:01,912 --> 00:11:03,539
Yeah, some kind of...
202
00:11:07,335 --> 00:11:08,711
Ah, shit.
203
00:11:13,424 --> 00:11:16,445
Did I tell you what we did in the
Euro-currency futures market last week?
204
00:11:16,469 --> 00:11:17,511
Probably.
205
00:11:17,595 --> 00:11:20,073
I thought I might have mentioned how
we picked up a Deutschmarks contract,
206
00:11:20,097 --> 00:11:23,100
sat on it a week, sold it
taking a 300 percent profit.
207
00:11:25,936 --> 00:11:29,815
Well, easy money
is money easily lost.
208
00:11:30,274 --> 00:11:33,736
See, I can't believe how dangerously
old-fashioned your thinking is.
209
00:11:34,945 --> 00:11:36,697
Three hundred percent profit, huh?
210
00:11:36,781 --> 00:11:39,200
Sometimes it's 200 percent,
sometimes 100 percent.
211
00:11:39,283 --> 00:11:41,077
Take the good with the bad.
212
00:11:41,660 --> 00:11:44,121
Yeah.
Still that's pretty good.
213
00:11:44,205 --> 00:11:46,165
The point of the matter is,
214
00:11:46,248 --> 00:11:47,541
you should have your piece too.
215
00:11:49,293 --> 00:11:50,711
Wow, hot!
216
00:11:50,795 --> 00:11:52,505
How are those tails?
217
00:11:52,588 --> 00:11:54,441
What? Who's saying something
about my tails? They're killers.
218
00:11:54,465 --> 00:11:56,675
- They're 28 bucks a pop.
- Twenty-eight? Oh, my God.
219
00:11:56,759 --> 00:12:00,471
You know, Chet and I haven't had lobster in
an age, not since our anniversary, anyway.
220
00:12:01,138 --> 00:12:03,224
Oh, my goodness!
Jumping lobster!
221
00:12:03,307 --> 00:12:05,393
Save that one.
That'll be for me.
222
00:12:05,476 --> 00:12:07,603
I'll make sure of that.
223
00:12:07,686 --> 00:12:11,107
How about the gourmet here?
You know what he wanted? Hot dogs.
224
00:12:11,273 --> 00:12:13,668
You know what they
make those things out of, huh, Chet?
225
00:12:13,692 --> 00:12:15,111
Lips and assholes.
226
00:12:17,113 --> 00:12:19,615
I guess I'm old-fashioned.
I like assholes.
227
00:12:19,990 --> 00:12:21,325
And I like lips!
228
00:12:22,952 --> 00:12:25,312
If I could market lips like those,
I'd make another million.
229
00:12:34,505 --> 00:12:38,008
Lobster turned out all right, huh?
If I do say so myself.
230
00:12:38,634 --> 00:12:41,429
So, I think we should go into town tomorrow
and pick up a ski boat.
231
00:12:41,512 --> 00:12:44,181
What do you say?
Sound good, guys?
232
00:12:44,390 --> 00:12:47,518
Uncle Roman will blow some coin
on a kick-ass drag boat.
233
00:12:47,852 --> 00:12:50,104
That's okay.
We're renting a pontoon boat.
234
00:12:50,187 --> 00:12:52,815
Pontoon boat. What the hell
you gonna do with a pontoon boat?
235
00:12:52,898 --> 00:12:54,191
Retake Omaha Beach?
236
00:12:54,275 --> 00:12:56,610
No, not at all.
237
00:12:57,153 --> 00:13:00,072
A pontoon boat, you go out
and, you know, you cruise the lake.
238
00:13:00,156 --> 00:13:03,742
You swim from them, you fish from them,
and even bring the barbecue out.
239
00:13:03,826 --> 00:13:05,995
You have a great time
with these things.
240
00:13:06,078 --> 00:13:08,372
You tour the lake in comfort
is what I'm saying.
241
00:13:08,456 --> 00:13:10,541
You guys wanna cruise
the lake in comfort
242
00:13:10,624 --> 00:13:13,419
or would you rather skim the waves
with Uncle Roman in a jet boat?
243
00:13:13,502 --> 00:13:14,670
Jet boat!
244
00:13:16,088 --> 00:13:17,131
Sorry, Dad.
245
00:13:17,214 --> 00:13:20,384
Attaboy, Benny!
All right, that's my man!
246
00:13:20,718 --> 00:13:22,720
Care to put it
to a vote, Chester?
247
00:13:22,803 --> 00:13:24,317
We don't need a vote, all right?
248
00:13:24,318 --> 00:13:26,682
If you guys want a jet boat,
you get a jet boat.
249
00:13:27,475 --> 00:13:29,369
Buck and I are getting
a pontoon boat, right, Buck?
250
00:13:29,393 --> 00:13:30,394
Sorry, Dad.
251
00:13:30,478 --> 00:13:32,480
Directly from the mouths
of babes, Chet.
252
00:13:32,563 --> 00:13:35,107
Are you gonna argue, or are you
gonna enjoy yourselves?
253
00:13:35,191 --> 00:13:37,860
Hey, I'm enjoying!
Chet's arguing.
254
00:13:37,943 --> 00:13:40,488
Hey, how about if the kids
go out and catch fireflies.
255
00:13:40,571 --> 00:13:41,715
You know, we could play cards.
256
00:13:41,739 --> 00:13:43,699
Cara? Mara?
257
00:13:43,866 --> 00:13:46,327
You little dolls wanna go outside
and catch fireflies?
258
00:13:46,410 --> 00:13:48,412
Honey, they don't like bugs.
259
00:13:48,662 --> 00:13:51,540
What do you mean?
All kids like bugs. They're cute.
260
00:13:51,749 --> 00:13:54,293
Especially fireflies. Their butts light up.
261
00:14:00,257 --> 00:14:02,510
I tell you,
I am a killer Monopoly player.
262
00:14:02,593 --> 00:14:05,095
Roman taught me. He's vicious.
263
00:14:06,555 --> 00:14:08,015
Buddy Reiser died.
264
00:14:08,098 --> 00:14:09,183
Oh, no!
265
00:14:09,266 --> 00:14:12,770
The president of Energy
and Resources died in bed.
266
00:14:13,354 --> 00:14:14,897
He was your mentor, wasn't he?
267
00:14:14,980 --> 00:14:16,690
One of the men I admired.
268
00:14:16,774 --> 00:14:18,025
Hey, I'm trying to read here.
269
00:14:18,108 --> 00:14:19,503
Yeah,
I'm reading the Wall Street Report.
270
00:14:19,527 --> 00:14:23,864
Sorry, I think I have
to tell you this story.
271
00:14:24,615 --> 00:14:26,700
A story that might save your lives
272
00:14:26,784 --> 00:14:28,344
since we're up here
in the North Woods.
273
00:14:28,369 --> 00:14:30,037
I know the Heimlich maneuver.
274
00:14:32,665 --> 00:14:35,417
No, this is
275
00:14:35,793 --> 00:14:37,253
a bear story.
276
00:14:39,964 --> 00:14:41,882
A true bear story.
277
00:14:44,468 --> 00:14:47,179
See, Connie and I honeymooned
up at this very same lake.
278
00:14:47,972 --> 00:14:49,181
Big spender.
279
00:14:50,140 --> 00:14:52,184
We stayed at my uncle's cabin.
280
00:14:52,268 --> 00:14:53,268
Uncle George?
281
00:14:53,310 --> 00:14:54,812
Yeah, that's right.
282
00:14:55,312 --> 00:14:57,648
One night
we were getting ready for bed
283
00:14:57,731 --> 00:15:02,194
and we heard this terrible noise
out by the trash cans.
284
00:15:02,945 --> 00:15:04,238
You remember?
285
00:15:04,321 --> 00:15:07,116
And, I went downstairs
286
00:15:07,199 --> 00:15:09,326
to check it out,
287
00:15:09,410 --> 00:15:10,995
looked out the window.
288
00:15:12,162 --> 00:15:14,039
And there
289
00:15:14,123 --> 00:15:18,043
was the biggest, baddest bear
290
00:15:18,127 --> 00:15:19,503
in the North Woods.
291
00:15:20,004 --> 00:15:21,088
Sure, Dad.
292
00:15:21,171 --> 00:15:23,924
No, it's true. It's true.
293
00:15:24,008 --> 00:15:28,178
This bear was over eight feet high.
294
00:15:30,097 --> 00:15:32,766
With big, white teeth.
295
00:15:34,435 --> 00:15:36,604
Fangs
296
00:15:36,687 --> 00:15:38,439
stained pink
297
00:15:40,024 --> 00:15:43,611
from whatever it killed
before it got to our cabin.
298
00:15:45,321 --> 00:15:46,614
It was frightening.
299
00:15:49,158 --> 00:15:50,743
Frightening.
300
00:15:52,036 --> 00:15:56,206
The paws on this thing
were immense...
301
00:15:57,374 --> 00:16:00,336
with big black claws,
302
00:16:01,045 --> 00:16:03,297
razor sharp
303
00:16:03,380 --> 00:16:05,549
like Freddy Krueger.
304
00:16:09,678 --> 00:16:11,472
Only worse. Worse, worse.
305
00:16:11,555 --> 00:16:14,090
This wasn't a movie.
This was happening.
306
00:16:14,091 --> 00:16:16,226
This was now.
This was right in front of me.
307
00:16:16,310 --> 00:16:19,188
And all that separated me
from that bear
308
00:16:19,271 --> 00:16:21,857
was a pane of glass.
309
00:16:21,940 --> 00:16:24,360
Honey, maybe we shouldn't tell
this story right now.
310
00:16:24,443 --> 00:16:25,986
Mom, it's fine.
311
00:16:26,070 --> 00:16:27,422
No, no.
I'm thinking about nightmares.
312
00:16:27,446 --> 00:16:30,532
No, no.
They have to hear this.
313
00:16:30,949 --> 00:16:34,453
Like I say, it might save
their life one day.
314
00:16:37,498 --> 00:16:40,501
Now I saw that bear,
315
00:16:40,584 --> 00:16:42,127
it saw me,
316
00:16:43,170 --> 00:16:45,089
and it was hungry.
317
00:16:46,173 --> 00:16:48,133
Hungry for blood!
318
00:16:49,510 --> 00:16:50,928
Human blood.
319
00:16:51,929 --> 00:16:55,599
You see, once a bear
gets a taste for blood,
320
00:16:56,725 --> 00:16:59,520
it craves it,
321
00:16:59,853 --> 00:17:01,605
it needs it.
322
00:17:01,980 --> 00:17:04,441
It will do anything it can to get it.
323
00:17:05,317 --> 00:17:08,612
That bear had become a man-eater.
324
00:17:10,364 --> 00:17:14,284
Our eyes locked.
My heart was pumping.
325
00:17:14,743 --> 00:17:17,538
Pump, pump, pump,
326
00:17:17,621 --> 00:17:20,541
pump, pump.
327
00:17:20,624 --> 00:17:22,418
I ran into the living room.
328
00:17:22,710 --> 00:17:24,628
I grabbed the shotgun
off the mantle.
329
00:17:24,753 --> 00:17:26,255
Turned around,
330
00:17:26,338 --> 00:17:29,258
and there was that bear
right in the window.
331
00:17:30,592 --> 00:17:33,554
Its breath was fogging up the glass.
332
00:17:35,597 --> 00:17:41,478
And suddenly it let out
this God-awful roar.
333
00:17:45,733 --> 00:17:47,484
It started smashing on the walls.
334
00:17:47,651 --> 00:17:49,811
Then the pots and pans started rattling.
335
00:17:49,862 --> 00:17:53,615
And the walls started shimmering
and the floorboards started lifting.
336
00:17:53,699 --> 00:17:57,077
I knew then that it was either the bear
or your mom and I.
337
00:17:57,161 --> 00:18:01,331
So I raised the rifle,
I took aim and I fired!
338
00:18:03,000 --> 00:18:04,084
You wasted her?
339
00:18:04,168 --> 00:18:05,290
Nah, Benny, Benny, Benny.
340
00:18:05,291 --> 00:18:07,713
A shotgun's not gonna kill
a monster bear like that!
341
00:18:07,796 --> 00:18:09,173
Well, what happened?
342
00:18:09,256 --> 00:18:12,509
The buckshot shaved the hair
clean off the top of its head.
343
00:18:12,926 --> 00:18:15,888
It ran off.
We never saw it again.
344
00:18:17,181 --> 00:18:19,683
I hear from my uncle
every now and then.
345
00:18:20,934 --> 00:18:24,396
And he'd tell us about
the bald-headed killer bear
346
00:18:24,855 --> 00:18:26,899
that was roaming about the area.
347
00:18:28,442 --> 00:18:31,403
The bald-headed killer bear
348
00:18:32,529 --> 00:18:34,531
of Clare County.
349
00:18:35,574 --> 00:18:36,617
Is she still around?
350
00:18:36,700 --> 00:18:40,662
No, no, no.
That bear's gone.
351
00:18:41,789 --> 00:18:43,957
She may be out there.
352
00:18:45,125 --> 00:18:47,544
Crazy, bloodthirsty as ever.
353
00:18:48,962 --> 00:18:50,881
So when you go to bed tonight,
354
00:18:52,382 --> 00:18:54,092
if you hear a noise,
355
00:18:55,219 --> 00:18:56,804
whatever you do,
356
00:18:58,055 --> 00:18:59,973
don't look out the window.
357
00:19:01,266 --> 00:19:02,426
Because it might be the bear!
358
00:19:05,646 --> 00:19:08,899
Jesus Christ! I'm half-drunk here, Chet.
What are you trying to do?
359
00:19:08,982 --> 00:19:10,234
Give me nightmares for a month?
360
00:19:10,317 --> 00:19:11,568
Come on, Roman.
361
00:19:11,652 --> 00:19:14,112
I can't believe you, Dad.
All right?
362
00:19:14,196 --> 00:19:16,073
Benny, Benny, honey!
363
00:19:17,032 --> 00:19:20,494
Gee, I'm 25 pounds overweight. I don't
need a blast to the ticker like that!
364
00:19:20,577 --> 00:19:22,663
I felt my plaque start flowing again!
365
00:19:22,746 --> 00:19:24,498
Really inappropriate, Chet.
366
00:19:24,581 --> 00:19:27,209
What? It was a story!
367
00:19:27,292 --> 00:19:28,585
Come on!
368
00:19:28,752 --> 00:19:32,631
Oh, come on!
It was a kind of true story.
369
00:19:33,090 --> 00:19:35,649
Part of it happened. I just
embellished a bit, that's all.
370
00:19:35,650 --> 00:19:36,927
Come on, kids.
371
00:19:37,010 --> 00:19:39,471
What? What?
What is that look?
372
00:19:39,888 --> 00:19:40,889
Benny...
373
00:19:40,973 --> 00:19:44,643
So now I get the look.
I was just trying to have some fun.
374
00:19:44,726 --> 00:19:45,727
Good night.
375
00:19:46,103 --> 00:19:47,855
Oh, God!
376
00:19:47,938 --> 00:19:50,399
So I made the fangs
a little bigger. Jeez.
377
00:19:57,114 --> 00:19:59,514
I'm telling you, you got
nothing to be afraid of, okay?
378
00:20:00,868 --> 00:20:01,994
I mean it.
379
00:20:03,579 --> 00:20:05,747
Look, it's a story
my dad told me,
380
00:20:05,831 --> 00:20:08,584
and I'm sure his dad told him,
and I'm telling you.
381
00:20:08,667 --> 00:20:09,751
It's just made up.
382
00:20:10,127 --> 00:20:14,298
One day you're gonna tell your kids
this story. You will. I guarantee it.
383
00:20:17,926 --> 00:20:19,177
Good evening.
384
00:20:20,095 --> 00:20:21,471
How's it going?
385
00:20:24,308 --> 00:20:26,602
Listen, girls,
386
00:20:26,685 --> 00:20:28,604
as your father,
387
00:20:29,229 --> 00:20:32,566
I feel it incumbent upon me
to set the record straight
388
00:20:32,649 --> 00:20:36,612
on the validity of the tale which
Uncle Chet shared with us this evening.
389
00:20:36,820 --> 00:20:38,447
I know that a terrifying story like that
390
00:20:38,530 --> 00:20:40,741
coming from the mouth
of a recognized authority figure
391
00:20:40,824 --> 00:20:42,635
could be traumatizing
for kids like yourselves.
392
00:20:42,659 --> 00:20:45,245
I know that because I had a similar
experience with my Uncle Roy
393
00:20:45,329 --> 00:20:48,582
and a story he used to tell about
a family that went into the woods
394
00:20:48,665 --> 00:20:51,585
and was attacked by a band
of escaped army psychiatric patients
395
00:20:51,668 --> 00:20:53,503
who'd been subjected to violent,
396
00:20:53,587 --> 00:20:57,090
hellish, torturous behavior-modification
experiments.
397
00:20:57,674 --> 00:21:01,219
It seems they escaped from
the metal boxes the army kept them in,
398
00:21:01,303 --> 00:21:03,305
found this family in the woods,
399
00:21:03,388 --> 00:21:06,016
fell upon them,
slaughtered them and ate them.
400
00:21:06,516 --> 00:21:10,520
Now, that story gave me nightmares
not to be believed.
401
00:21:10,604 --> 00:21:14,191
I don't want Uncle Chet's bear story
to upset you in the same way.
402
00:21:14,316 --> 00:21:17,152
So I'm here to say
that there actually is no bear
403
00:21:17,235 --> 00:21:18,946
and that all
of what Uncle Chet was saying
404
00:21:19,029 --> 00:21:21,949
was just a yarn, spinning
for our entertainment.
405
00:21:22,032 --> 00:21:26,036
And even if there were a bear out there,
I'm in the house to protect you.
406
00:21:27,287 --> 00:21:31,583
So, no more thinking
about bears, all right?
407
00:21:32,125 --> 00:21:34,544
No more thinking
about unpleasant things.
408
00:21:34,920 --> 00:21:40,175
We're gonna close our eyes
and dream about nice things.
409
00:21:40,801 --> 00:21:42,970
About cuddly,
410
00:21:43,053 --> 00:21:45,931
soft, fluffy things.
411
00:21:47,557 --> 00:21:49,059
Okay?
412
00:21:49,810 --> 00:21:51,186
Super.
413
00:21:51,603 --> 00:21:54,272
Good night. Sleep tight.
414
00:22:57,753 --> 00:22:58,879
Honey?
415
00:23:00,380 --> 00:23:03,800
Chet? Where are you?
416
00:23:07,137 --> 00:23:10,974
Oh, God! That's rotted. Oh!
417
00:23:12,893 --> 00:23:15,353
Hello. Jerry Asmuth, please.
Roman Craig.
418
00:23:15,812 --> 00:23:17,331
Yeah, I can hold,
but not for too long.
419
00:23:17,355 --> 00:23:20,317
I'm in God's country here.
My signal's kind of weak.
420
00:23:32,829 --> 00:23:35,082
- Honey?
- Yes, Roman?
421
00:23:35,290 --> 00:23:38,752
Why is it Chet's kids
look at him like he's Zeus
422
00:23:38,835 --> 00:23:42,214
and my kids look at me
like I'm a rack of yard tools at Sears?
423
00:23:43,465 --> 00:23:46,093
I mean, why can't they
connect with me?
424
00:23:47,344 --> 00:23:50,514
Well, honey,
maybe if you spent less time at work
425
00:23:50,597 --> 00:23:52,658
and a little more time with us,
things would be different.
426
00:23:52,682 --> 00:23:54,434
Put a cork in it, honey.
Talking business.
427
00:23:54,518 --> 00:23:57,687
Jerry. Yeah, Roman.
How are you?
428
00:23:58,230 --> 00:24:01,149
Listen, I'll save us a lot of trouble now
and cut right to the chase.
429
00:24:01,233 --> 00:24:03,860
I got an unbelievable
investment opportunity for you.
430
00:24:03,944 --> 00:24:07,197
You got about three minutes
and 25 grand? Jerry?
431
00:24:07,531 --> 00:24:09,574
Did you hear what I said?
432
00:24:09,658 --> 00:24:12,011
Lost the signal here.
These cellular phones, they don't work.
433
00:24:12,035 --> 00:24:13,995
Well, maybe he hung up on you.
434
00:24:14,329 --> 00:24:16,068
Why would our minister hang up on me?
435
00:24:16,069 --> 00:24:17,207
I've been to his church.
436
00:24:17,290 --> 00:24:19,209
Yeah! Once!
437
00:24:21,878 --> 00:24:23,004
All right!
438
00:24:23,088 --> 00:24:26,007
How about that, huh?
439
00:24:26,466 --> 00:24:30,053
We're gonna be scraping the bugs
off our teeth with this baby, Ben!
440
00:24:30,137 --> 00:24:34,432
That's too much boat.
It's just too much.
441
00:24:34,724 --> 00:24:38,145
- Can I ask you a question?
- Sure. Are you hungry?
442
00:24:38,728 --> 00:24:41,648
Give me four chili dogs
and two plain dogs, please.
443
00:24:42,732 --> 00:24:44,359
That's six hot dogs, Dad.
444
00:24:44,442 --> 00:24:47,154
It's for everybody, all right?
And I'm hungry.
445
00:24:48,822 --> 00:24:49,823
So?
446
00:24:49,906 --> 00:24:53,537
Oh, yeah. Do you mind
if I just walk around for a while?
447
00:24:53,538 --> 00:24:56,413
You know, cruise the town?
I can walk back when I'm done.
448
00:24:57,581 --> 00:25:00,250
All right, all right.
But you gotta promise me
449
00:25:00,375 --> 00:25:02,040
when you get back we're gonna
spend some time together.
450
00:25:02,041 --> 00:25:02,502
Right.
451
00:25:02,586 --> 00:25:04,313
- That's why we're up here, you know.
- I know.
452
00:25:04,337 --> 00:25:06,274
That's the point of this trip,
to be in the woods.
453
00:25:06,298 --> 00:25:07,841
The men, the guys, together.
454
00:25:07,924 --> 00:25:10,135
Rugged, manly, all that stuff.
The full nine yards.
455
00:25:10,218 --> 00:25:11,845
- Exactly.
- All right?
456
00:25:11,928 --> 00:25:13,555
Right.
457
00:25:14,097 --> 00:25:16,308
- Give me a hug.
- What?
458
00:25:16,433 --> 00:25:18,727
- Give me a hug, will you? Come on.
- Dad...
459
00:25:18,810 --> 00:25:20,187
I'm too old for hugs.
460
00:25:20,270 --> 00:25:22,189
You're never too old for hugs.
461
00:25:23,565 --> 00:25:24,714
- Can I go now?
- Go, go, go.
462
00:25:24,715 --> 00:25:26,109
Thank you very much. Thank you.
463
00:25:26,318 --> 00:25:30,697
If you meet any friends, bring them back.
We'll give them a ride in Suck My Wake.
464
00:25:37,287 --> 00:25:38,747
God! Great.
465
00:25:40,957 --> 00:25:43,460
You've got it in neutral!
466
00:25:44,711 --> 00:25:46,046
It's okay.
467
00:25:46,129 --> 00:25:48,965
It's in neutral.
You gotta put it...
468
00:26:05,815 --> 00:26:06,375
Okay.
469
00:26:06,376 --> 00:26:09,277
Dad, I'll figure it out.
Just give me the skis already.
470
00:26:09,361 --> 00:26:12,906
I'm sorry, I forgot.
You're a professional skier already.
471
00:26:12,989 --> 00:26:14,699
You don't need any notes on this, huh?
472
00:26:14,824 --> 00:26:16,485
You don't need any help
from somebody
473
00:26:16,486 --> 00:26:18,954
who might know a little
something about skiing, huh?
474
00:26:19,079 --> 00:26:21,307
- We're gonna go over it one more time, okay?
- Fine.
475
00:26:21,331 --> 00:26:23,226
- Come on, this is important, Ben.
- Okay!
476
00:26:23,250 --> 00:26:25,835
What are we doing sitting here?
477
00:26:25,919 --> 00:26:27,888
You know, he's teaching the kid,
giving him lessons.
478
00:26:27,889 --> 00:26:29,506
Wants Benny to be safe.
479
00:26:29,673 --> 00:26:31,633
Lean back. There you go.
Doesn't that feel better?
480
00:26:31,675 --> 00:26:32,676
Yeah.
481
00:26:32,759 --> 00:26:34,265
There you go.
Okay, we're leaning back.
482
00:26:34,266 --> 00:26:35,971
Okay, now there's trouble.
483
00:26:36,054 --> 00:26:38,765
- What?
- There's some trouble.
484
00:26:38,848 --> 00:26:40,892
Come on, Ben,
what are we gonna do?
485
00:26:40,976 --> 00:26:42,435
Let go of the rope.
486
00:26:43,520 --> 00:26:44,664
How many times have I told you?
487
00:26:44,688 --> 00:26:46,999
Let go of the rope. If you're
in trouble, let go of the rope.
488
00:26:47,023 --> 00:26:50,694
Remember, go loose when you fall.
Just go loose.
489
00:26:50,777 --> 00:26:52,171
- What is he doing?
- I don't know.
490
00:26:52,195 --> 00:26:53,759
I don't know, he's shaking.
491
00:26:53,760 --> 00:26:55,323
Some kind of a new dance
or something.
492
00:26:55,699 --> 00:26:57,510
- Okay, hold this. Thanks, Dad.
- Fix your vest up.
493
00:26:57,534 --> 00:26:59,786
Are we gonna ski or what?
494
00:26:59,869 --> 00:27:00,996
I can't tell you...
495
00:27:02,163 --> 00:27:03,164
how important this is.
496
00:27:06,209 --> 00:27:08,336
Let's go! Ski or flee.
497
00:27:08,962 --> 00:27:10,964
Honey, he's waving.
498
00:27:11,047 --> 00:27:13,925
He's going. All right.
499
00:27:17,887 --> 00:27:20,056
Whoa!
500
00:27:28,273 --> 00:27:30,317
Hey, Dad, let go of the rope!
501
00:27:32,819 --> 00:27:34,738
Help me, for God's sake!
502
00:27:35,488 --> 00:27:37,782
Holy shit!
503
00:27:39,242 --> 00:27:40,618
Oh, no!
504
00:27:44,914 --> 00:27:46,583
Whoa!
505
00:27:54,632 --> 00:27:56,009
You bastard!
506
00:27:56,092 --> 00:27:58,678
Whoa! Whoa!
507
00:27:58,762 --> 00:28:00,805
Whoa!
508
00:28:02,682 --> 00:28:04,059
You bastard, Roman!
509
00:28:04,142 --> 00:28:07,103
What's he saying?
510
00:28:07,479 --> 00:28:08,480
You bastard!
511
00:28:08,563 --> 00:28:10,273
- What's he saying?
- "Faster".
512
00:28:11,608 --> 00:28:13,234
Go faster!
513
00:28:16,613 --> 00:28:17,739
Hi!
514
00:28:17,822 --> 00:28:19,949
Roman, what the hell
are you doing?
515
00:28:20,033 --> 00:28:22,160
I love to see him relaxing.
516
00:28:27,123 --> 00:28:30,251
I'm dead! I'm dead!
I'm dead! I'm dead!
517
00:28:30,335 --> 00:28:33,463
I'm dead!
I'm dying! I'm dying!
518
00:28:34,964 --> 00:28:35,965
I'm dying!
519
00:28:38,843 --> 00:28:42,555
I'm alive. I'm alive.
Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!
520
00:28:44,682 --> 00:28:46,684
No!
521
00:29:37,902 --> 00:29:39,529
What are you doing?
522
00:29:39,612 --> 00:29:41,197
What's it look like I'm doing?
523
00:29:41,281 --> 00:29:43,533
I am not taking any more
of Roman's crap.
524
00:29:43,616 --> 00:29:46,345
If you like him, you stay with him,
'cause I'm through. I'm out of here.
525
00:29:46,369 --> 00:29:49,289
Wait a minute. Wait a minute.
What happened that got you so crazy?
526
00:29:49,414 --> 00:29:52,459
"What happened?"
Come on! "What happened?"
527
00:29:52,542 --> 00:29:54,478
How about Roman dragging me
all over the goddamn lake?
528
00:29:54,479 --> 00:29:55,837
How about that for starters, huh?
529
00:29:55,920 --> 00:29:57,213
Not bad, huh?
530
00:29:57,297 --> 00:29:59,966
- Have you seen my ass lately?
- No, not recently.
531
00:30:00,049 --> 00:30:02,528
Well, I'll be picking splinters out of it
from now until the day I die!
532
00:30:02,552 --> 00:30:04,304
Honey, come on.
533
00:30:04,387 --> 00:30:06,657
You find that funny?
Yeah, that was hysterical, wasn't it?
534
00:30:06,681 --> 00:30:09,559
No, it wasn't really funny,
but because I love you, it was.
535
00:30:09,642 --> 00:30:11,728
God. Thanks a lot!
536
00:30:11,811 --> 00:30:13,313
What about the kids?
537
00:30:13,396 --> 00:30:16,107
What about his kids?
Let's talk about his kids.
538
00:30:16,441 --> 00:30:18,902
His kids, they're spooky,
all right?
539
00:30:18,985 --> 00:30:22,071
I'm waiting for their heads
to rotate around and vomit pea soup.
540
00:30:22,155 --> 00:30:23,531
I mean our kids.
541
00:30:24,991 --> 00:30:26,576
Our kids already do that.
542
00:30:26,659 --> 00:30:29,662
What about this father-son thing?
You're gonna leave, you're gonna pack up?
543
00:30:29,746 --> 00:30:30,747
Come on!
544
00:30:31,206 --> 00:30:32,999
The guy's driving me crazy!
545
00:30:33,124 --> 00:30:37,295
You're a big man. And you're a nice man.
And you're above all this.
546
00:30:37,378 --> 00:30:39,172
- Don't.
- Hey, you are.
547
00:30:39,255 --> 00:30:40,590
Oh, come on.
548
00:30:40,840 --> 00:30:42,175
I know it to be true.
549
00:30:42,258 --> 00:30:44,594
All right, don't!
Don't. Don't!
550
00:30:44,677 --> 00:30:46,179
Come on, I'm mad.
I'm mad.
551
00:30:48,431 --> 00:30:51,518
All right, all right, what are you saying?
I'm being silly?
552
00:30:51,601 --> 00:30:53,770
Crazy! Stop.
553
00:30:54,896 --> 00:30:56,536
Why do you always do this
to me, you know?
554
00:30:56,606 --> 00:30:58,525
I'm crazy about you.
Kiss me.
555
00:31:00,193 --> 00:31:02,529
- Do you feel better?
- I do, and I'm sorry.
556
00:31:02,612 --> 00:31:04,906
I just feel like a little kid.
I feel a lot better.
557
00:31:04,989 --> 00:31:08,034
Why did you do this?
Why now? I was ready to go!
558
00:31:08,201 --> 00:31:09,994
Why, why, why?
559
00:31:10,078 --> 00:31:11,621
I was almost in the car!
560
00:31:11,704 --> 00:31:13,873
Now I've got to spend
a week with Roman!
561
00:31:15,041 --> 00:31:18,169
Come on. You're gonna have fun
from now on in, I promise you.
562
00:31:18,253 --> 00:31:21,756
Roman's making goat cheese pizza
and we'll take it over to the lodge.
563
00:31:21,839 --> 00:31:23,550
He's making what?
564
00:31:24,467 --> 00:31:26,177
- What did you say?
- Pizza?
565
00:31:26,261 --> 00:31:27,947
No, you didn't say pizza,
you said something else.
566
00:31:27,971 --> 00:31:29,597
- Big man pizza.
- What are you hiding?
567
00:31:29,681 --> 00:31:30,682
Big pizza!
568
00:31:30,765 --> 00:31:32,660
You don't have to hide from me.
Tell me what it is.
569
00:31:32,684 --> 00:31:34,161
- Pizza.
- You said a "goat" in there.
570
00:31:34,185 --> 00:31:37,438
Is he making goat pizza or something?
What is this? Hey! Come here. Connie!
571
00:31:40,441 --> 00:31:43,444
Roman, I got a few things
to gnaw over with you.
572
00:31:43,570 --> 00:31:44,946
What's going on, Wally?
573
00:31:45,029 --> 00:31:47,740
I found your youngsters
inside the mine perimeter.
574
00:31:47,824 --> 00:31:48,825
What mine?
575
00:31:48,908 --> 00:31:51,494
There's an old mica mine
on the other side of the property.
576
00:31:51,578 --> 00:31:55,915
It's full of boreholes and
sinkholes and pits, caves, hollows.
577
00:31:55,999 --> 00:31:58,960
The war shut the facility down.
It's never been reopened.
578
00:31:59,043 --> 00:32:02,088
Anyway, the kids go there
and they yell down the hole
579
00:32:02,171 --> 00:32:04,340
so they can hear their voices echo.
580
00:32:05,550 --> 00:32:08,219
I'm not gonna tell you
what the teenagers do there.
581
00:32:08,303 --> 00:32:09,596
I'll bet.
582
00:32:09,679 --> 00:32:12,181
- Tell Ripley, too, huh?
- Done.
583
00:32:12,682 --> 00:32:14,767
Take care of them, Roman.
584
00:32:16,894 --> 00:32:20,440
We got a shot to see a female
Elvis impersonator over in White Water
585
00:32:20,523 --> 00:32:23,610
and you want to wish happy birthday
to a guy you never even met?
586
00:32:23,693 --> 00:32:25,862
You want to go to White Water,
go to White Water.
587
00:32:25,945 --> 00:32:29,240
As for me, I find it more
interesting to pay my respects
588
00:32:29,324 --> 00:32:32,493
to a man who's had the courage
to live on this earth 109 years.
589
00:32:32,577 --> 00:32:35,997
You know, he's the oldest living man
in Canada, kids. Isn't that something?
590
00:32:36,080 --> 00:32:39,542
Personally, I'd rather see
a 46-inch bust singing "Burning Love".
591
00:32:44,380 --> 00:32:46,549
- Hey, Wally!
- How you doing?
592
00:32:46,633 --> 00:32:50,303
How about a nice club soda, please?
I'm driving tonight.
593
00:32:51,721 --> 00:32:55,058
Nice outfit!
You're Mr. Coordinated tonight, huh?
594
00:32:55,141 --> 00:32:57,435
- Well...
- Quite the look on you.
595
00:32:58,645 --> 00:33:01,731
Well, the pants are riding
up the butt something fierce
596
00:33:01,814 --> 00:33:03,900
but I'll get by.
597
00:33:05,151 --> 00:33:07,695
Wally, what's the bear dump
situation like?
598
00:33:07,820 --> 00:33:09,530
We got a good one.
599
00:33:09,614 --> 00:33:11,741
Good evening, sir.
Happy birthday.
600
00:33:11,908 --> 00:33:13,385
He must be hard of hearing
or something.
601
00:33:13,409 --> 00:33:14,661
Try again.
602
00:33:16,412 --> 00:33:18,831
Do you speak English?
603
00:33:18,915 --> 00:33:21,334
Our sincerest
congratulations, sir.
604
00:33:21,918 --> 00:33:23,920
You wishing Mr. Tompkins
a happy birthday?
605
00:33:24,003 --> 00:33:25,367
Yeah, Dad, about 100 times.
606
00:33:25,368 --> 00:33:27,524
I don't think the guy can hear us
or something. He's deaf.
607
00:33:27,548 --> 00:33:29,787
How about a nice group photo, huh?
Give me your camera.
608
00:33:29,788 --> 00:33:31,427
All right, everybody get in there.
609
00:33:31,511 --> 00:33:32,845
What do I do,
push the red button?
610
00:33:32,929 --> 00:33:34,169
Just the red button, Dad.
611
00:33:34,222 --> 00:33:35,699
- How do you focus?
- You don't focus.
612
00:33:35,723 --> 00:33:36,865
You don't have to focus?
613
00:33:36,866 --> 00:33:38,661
You don't have to focus.
Just push the red button.
614
00:33:38,685 --> 00:33:42,188
Chet, I don't like them youngsters
climbing around Mr. Tompkins like that.
615
00:33:42,271 --> 00:33:43,690
He ain't no jungle gym.
616
00:33:43,773 --> 00:33:46,734
All right, girls, why don't you kiss
Mr. Tompkins on the cheek?
617
00:33:47,193 --> 00:33:49,195
- A nice kiss on the cheek.
- No.
618
00:33:49,278 --> 00:33:50,822
Come on, it's cute.
619
00:33:50,905 --> 00:33:53,217
What old man wouldn't like
a little girl kissing him on the cheek?
620
00:33:53,241 --> 00:33:54,659
- A dead one.
- Huh?
621
00:33:54,742 --> 00:33:56,953
Bill died in the car
on the way over here.
622
00:33:57,036 --> 00:33:58,871
Jesus, Dad!
623
00:33:59,414 --> 00:34:03,418
Go wash, go wash, go wash!
In the bathroom. In the bathroom.
624
00:34:04,001 --> 00:34:06,629
- How could you do that?
- I didn't do that. He did it.
625
00:34:06,713 --> 00:34:09,173
You're disgusting. Kids?
626
00:34:28,151 --> 00:34:31,988
That was a real good shot.
That was really, really good.
627
00:34:45,752 --> 00:34:47,420
What the hell...
628
00:34:52,675 --> 00:34:56,512
Hey, you gave her a world-class goose
with the pool cue, Buck.
629
00:34:56,846 --> 00:34:58,556
She's so cute!
630
00:34:59,432 --> 00:35:01,392
Violent, but yeah, cute.
631
00:35:01,476 --> 00:35:03,227
You got chalk right there.
632
00:35:04,020 --> 00:35:05,497
Look, I'll be back
in a couple of minutes, okay?
633
00:35:05,521 --> 00:35:07,356
What about the bear dump?
634
00:35:13,696 --> 00:35:17,658
Hey, it's crowded.
Hey, this is great.
635
00:35:18,117 --> 00:35:19,118
Yeah, Dad.
636
00:35:19,202 --> 00:35:21,162
See, a lot of people
are hip to this.
637
00:35:21,245 --> 00:35:24,415
Yeah. Hey!
638
00:35:25,166 --> 00:35:28,169
All right.
Look at those bears!
639
00:35:28,711 --> 00:35:31,339
Are you scared or what?
640
00:35:31,756 --> 00:35:33,800
Look at the bears!
641
00:35:33,883 --> 00:35:36,302
- They're great, Dad.
- "They're great, Dad".
642
00:35:36,594 --> 00:35:39,347
I've got a great idea.
You're gonna see some bears.
643
00:35:39,555 --> 00:35:41,933
Dad.
644
00:35:44,852 --> 00:35:46,020
Here you go.
645
00:35:46,437 --> 00:35:47,605
Nice Zagnut.
646
00:35:49,065 --> 00:35:50,566
Yeah!
647
00:35:50,650 --> 00:35:52,527
Come on.
648
00:35:53,110 --> 00:35:54,862
Come on.
649
00:35:55,404 --> 00:35:57,365
Come on! More!
650
00:35:57,907 --> 00:36:00,409
Come on. Here's some more.
651
00:36:03,871 --> 00:36:06,207
Jeez. Boy, he likes those.
652
00:36:06,874 --> 00:36:08,167
Now we'll get some action.
653
00:36:08,251 --> 00:36:10,837
Whoa. Big head on him.
654
00:36:11,379 --> 00:36:12,588
Whoo boy!
655
00:36:13,005 --> 00:36:15,925
Easy, easy, easy there!
Easy!
656
00:36:16,509 --> 00:36:18,553
Hey, come on, watch the paint job.
657
00:36:18,678 --> 00:36:20,972
Hey, shoo!
658
00:36:21,055 --> 00:36:22,765
Look at the size
of those teeth. Whoo.
659
00:36:22,849 --> 00:36:23,850
Jeez.
660
00:36:25,726 --> 00:36:27,562
Hey, shoo! Go on!
661
00:36:27,645 --> 00:36:28,813
Dad, I wouldn't do that.
662
00:36:28,896 --> 00:36:32,525
All right. You may be right.
Yeah, he's looking at us.
663
00:36:32,608 --> 00:36:35,778
He's not finished, that's it.
When he finishes, he'll go.
664
00:36:36,821 --> 00:36:39,031
He's a pretty big bear.
665
00:36:39,615 --> 00:36:40,700
Very big.
Yeah.
666
00:36:41,409 --> 00:36:43,619
Just let him eat his candy bar.
667
00:36:43,744 --> 00:36:46,706
Shoo, shoo, shoo. Hi.
668
00:36:47,290 --> 00:36:49,208
How you doing?
669
00:36:50,376 --> 00:36:51,919
Whoa, jeez.
670
00:36:55,756 --> 00:36:58,968
Jeez. All right,
all right, all right. Okay.
671
00:36:59,635 --> 00:37:01,470
Let me rethink this.
672
00:37:02,471 --> 00:37:05,349
Hey! What the hell?
673
00:37:14,984 --> 00:37:16,819
All right...
674
00:37:17,153 --> 00:37:20,948
I've... I've told you
I loved you, right?
675
00:37:21,032 --> 00:37:23,284
Yeah.
Good, good.
676
00:37:25,661 --> 00:37:27,246
What do you say
we call it a night, huh?
677
00:37:28,456 --> 00:37:29,498
Holy jeez.
678
00:37:29,582 --> 00:37:33,169
Oh, boy. Oh, boy.
We started something.
679
00:37:34,754 --> 00:37:36,255
Let's call it an evening.
680
00:37:36,339 --> 00:37:38,507
- Yeah, I'm tired.
- Me, too. Me, too.
681
00:37:38,674 --> 00:37:40,760
Yeah, let's just go.
682
00:37:44,388 --> 00:37:46,182
That didn't scare him, Dad.
683
00:37:46,891 --> 00:37:49,101
I'm gonna move now.
684
00:37:49,185 --> 00:37:50,853
I'm moving now!
685
00:37:51,604 --> 00:37:53,814
All right, I'll just drive out.
686
00:37:54,440 --> 00:37:57,610
He'll jump right off, son.
Don't you worry.
687
00:37:58,694 --> 00:38:02,990
Dad, isn't it illegal to drive
with a bear on your hood?
688
00:38:03,074 --> 00:38:05,701
I don't know in this state, son.
Look, I just don't...
689
00:38:07,370 --> 00:38:09,497
Yogi and Boo Boo in the flesh.
690
00:38:10,081 --> 00:38:12,625
I wish to hell Ranger Smith
would get out here and get us home.
691
00:38:13,834 --> 00:38:15,628
Hey, easy on the roof, pal.
692
00:38:15,962 --> 00:38:18,214
We should've brought
Uncle Roman's car.
693
00:38:24,095 --> 00:38:25,846
Knock, knock.
694
00:38:26,347 --> 00:38:30,101
You didn't give me
a chance to apologize.
695
00:38:36,357 --> 00:38:37,650
Can I sit down?
696
00:38:37,733 --> 00:38:39,235
I don't own the park.
697
00:38:43,990 --> 00:38:46,492
Look...
698
00:38:47,076 --> 00:38:49,245
- I just got here. I'm from...
- Chicago.
699
00:38:50,246 --> 00:38:51,288
How did you know?
700
00:38:51,372 --> 00:38:53,207
Look, it's no big trick, dude.
701
00:38:53,290 --> 00:38:56,752
Live all your life in this town,
it becomes like second nature.
702
00:38:57,211 --> 00:39:00,256
Guess this means that
I met my first local.
703
00:39:00,589 --> 00:39:02,675
You don't know how local I am.
704
00:39:04,677 --> 00:39:06,721
You know...
705
00:39:08,472 --> 00:39:12,727
it's... It's a really
beautiful town.
706
00:39:13,310 --> 00:39:15,855
- I mean...
- It's a hole in the earth.
707
00:39:17,690 --> 00:39:19,358
Look, why don't you
just save your breath?
708
00:39:19,442 --> 00:39:21,360
I'm not a tourist attraction.
709
00:39:25,740 --> 00:39:26,949
What did I do?
710
00:39:36,709 --> 00:39:37,877
Hey, Dad.
711
00:39:39,462 --> 00:39:40,880
How you doing, handsome?
712
00:39:40,963 --> 00:39:43,215
What are you doing down here?
713
00:39:43,966 --> 00:39:45,885
Getting a breath of night air.
714
00:39:48,345 --> 00:39:52,183
Hey, you wanna take
a spin in the rowboat?
715
00:39:53,309 --> 00:39:55,227
- Right now?
- Yeah, what the hell?
716
00:39:55,311 --> 00:39:57,313
- In the dark?
- We'll check out some stars.
717
00:39:57,396 --> 00:40:00,107
- I don't know, Dad.
- Come on. Let's do something.
718
00:40:00,483 --> 00:40:02,568
You know, we're here.
Let's go. Come on.
719
00:40:02,651 --> 00:40:05,029
Come on. I'll let you row.
720
00:40:05,112 --> 00:40:06,112
Oh, great.
721
00:40:06,155 --> 00:40:08,115
- It'll be fun.
- Yeah.
722
00:40:10,117 --> 00:40:13,245
Boy, what a beautiful sky!
723
00:40:13,871 --> 00:40:16,582
Smell that air.
Isn't that something?
724
00:40:18,250 --> 00:40:20,002
That's the old city
in your lungs.
725
00:40:20,086 --> 00:40:23,255
Get rid of that.
You're getting the good air in there now.
726
00:40:23,839 --> 00:40:27,343
You know, one day you're gonna be
coming up here with your kids.
727
00:40:28,010 --> 00:40:29,303
Yeah. Maybe.
728
00:40:30,304 --> 00:40:31,806
I want to give you something.
729
00:40:31,889 --> 00:40:35,684
Dad, you're not gonna kiss me
in the boat under the moon, are you?
730
00:40:35,851 --> 00:40:37,520
I'm not gonna kiss you.
731
00:40:38,145 --> 00:40:39,939
I'm gonna give you my ring.
732
00:40:41,023 --> 00:40:42,233
Why?
733
00:40:42,525 --> 00:40:45,986
Why? Because my father
gave it to me,
734
00:40:46,070 --> 00:40:47,947
and now I'm giving it to you.
735
00:40:48,030 --> 00:40:50,032
You're grown up now.
You deserve it.
736
00:40:50,116 --> 00:40:51,784
So, like...
737
00:40:53,452 --> 00:40:57,331
You and I coming up to the woods
is like your father bringing you here.
738
00:40:57,665 --> 00:40:59,125
Yeah, I guess so.
739
00:40:59,208 --> 00:41:00,876
Yeah. I understand.
740
00:41:02,503 --> 00:41:04,004
Thanks for the ring.
741
00:42:00,019 --> 00:42:02,521
How you doing, Cammie?
742
00:42:04,023 --> 00:42:05,608
Can I help you?
743
00:42:06,609 --> 00:42:09,445
I don't know.
What's the house specialty?
744
00:42:10,946 --> 00:42:12,615
Where am I supposed
to put the tray?
745
00:42:13,782 --> 00:42:15,427
Well, from the way
you spoke to me last night,
746
00:42:15,451 --> 00:42:17,661
I'm sure you can think
of a hundred good places.
747
00:42:17,745 --> 00:42:20,915
I'm sorry about that.
I was in kind of a bad mood, okay?
748
00:42:21,457 --> 00:42:23,894
Don't worry about it. It happens to me
all the time. It's no big deal.
749
00:42:23,918 --> 00:42:25,920
But that doesn't mean
I didn't mean what I said.
750
00:42:25,921 --> 00:42:27,922
For the most part, it's true.
751
00:42:28,005 --> 00:42:30,257
Wait.
You don't even know me.
752
00:42:30,341 --> 00:42:33,010
How can you say that's true of me?
753
00:42:33,093 --> 00:42:34,345
It's a safe assumption.
754
00:42:34,428 --> 00:42:36,472
Excuse me. Can we get
some service over here?
755
00:42:36,555 --> 00:42:39,433
Yeah, I'll be right there. Just a sec.
Look, I gotta go. Okay?
756
00:42:39,516 --> 00:42:41,727
What time do you finish work?
757
00:42:41,810 --> 00:42:42,811
8:00.
758
00:42:42,895 --> 00:42:43,979
8:00?
759
00:42:44,772 --> 00:42:47,399
And where are you gonna be
after work at 8:00?
760
00:42:47,650 --> 00:42:49,151
I'll be around.
761
00:42:50,152 --> 00:42:51,487
Can I see you?
762
00:42:52,196 --> 00:42:54,323
Yeah, if you can find me.
763
00:43:21,642 --> 00:43:23,644
I got you! I got you!
764
00:43:32,820 --> 00:43:36,115
Come on, Chet.
Better ride up here.
765
00:43:36,198 --> 00:43:38,033
If you trail behind,
the Indians will get you.
766
00:43:39,201 --> 00:43:41,704
- Come on, honey.
- Uncle Roman, wait for Dad.
767
00:43:41,787 --> 00:43:43,789
Dad, hurry up.
768
00:43:43,872 --> 00:43:45,040
Oh, boy.
769
00:43:45,124 --> 00:43:48,794
Watch out
for those Wisconsin rattlers or wild boar.
770
00:43:48,877 --> 00:43:52,172
- Honey, come on!
- Whoa. Whoa.
771
00:43:52,673 --> 00:43:54,466
Wait up, you guys.
772
00:43:55,634 --> 00:43:58,512
Hey, come on.
Whoa! Hey!
773
00:43:58,846 --> 00:44:02,641
Easy. All right.
Okay, have it your way.
774
00:44:03,183 --> 00:44:05,978
I'll just get off.
775
00:44:06,270 --> 00:44:08,731
Here we go. You all right?
776
00:44:09,523 --> 00:44:11,317
Okay, let's go. We'll walk it.
777
00:44:11,400 --> 00:44:14,236
Come on. Come on! Let's...
778
00:44:15,904 --> 00:44:20,492
Hey. Easy, easy.
Now, let's just walk back to the stable.
779
00:44:20,576 --> 00:44:23,078
All right?
I'm walking, you're walking.
780
00:44:23,329 --> 00:44:25,622
Let's have a nice easy walk.
Come on.
781
00:44:27,666 --> 00:44:31,170
All right. All right.
That was your last chance.
782
00:44:31,253 --> 00:44:33,881
That's it. Have it your way.
783
00:44:34,631 --> 00:44:38,302
I don't wanna do this, but you
forced me to. Remember that.
784
00:44:40,679 --> 00:44:42,639
I hate to do this to you.
785
00:44:43,265 --> 00:44:45,851
Normally, I'm not
a mean person, but I'm a...
786
00:44:46,393 --> 00:44:48,604
Hey! Come back here!
Son of a bitch!
787
00:44:50,481 --> 00:44:55,194
I tell you that baby I was riding
was a purebred. Purebred mule horse.
788
00:44:57,029 --> 00:44:58,364
You rode it like it was.
789
00:44:58,447 --> 00:45:01,492
Hey, I'm telling you,
that baby was bred for packing.
790
00:45:01,575 --> 00:45:03,786
Honey, you're a stud.
You look great on that horse.
791
00:45:03,869 --> 00:45:05,764
- Here he comes.
- Where's our pal? Where is he?
792
00:45:05,788 --> 00:45:07,790
Oh, my gosh! Hi, honey.
793
00:45:08,248 --> 00:45:11,043
He lost his mount.
Hey, how you doing there, trooper?
794
00:45:11,627 --> 00:45:13,879
Where's that ball-slapping
nag you were riding?
795
00:45:15,297 --> 00:45:17,383
He looks a little worse
for wear, doesn't he?
796
00:45:17,466 --> 00:45:18,550
You okay, Dad?
797
00:45:18,634 --> 00:45:20,803
- I'm okay.
- Did that horse buck you off?
798
00:45:20,886 --> 00:45:23,013
What happened?
799
00:45:23,097 --> 00:45:24,777
You got hungry
and had to eat the nag, huh?
800
00:45:24,848 --> 00:45:27,434
- Let's go home. I think I'll go home.
- You go home?
801
00:45:27,518 --> 00:45:30,496
Home? We've got a whole
day of activities planned.
802
00:45:30,497 --> 00:45:31,313
A little nap.
803
00:45:31,397 --> 00:45:33,399
- No, come on!
- Oh, yeah.
804
00:45:33,482 --> 00:45:36,485
- I'm fine. A little nap.
- Come on. Hey!
805
00:46:07,182 --> 00:46:09,935
Yeah, I know muskie's
the big-deal fish up in these waters,
806
00:46:10,018 --> 00:46:12,497
but you come with me up to the Norfolk
Canyon off the coast of Virginia,
807
00:46:12,521 --> 00:46:13,873
I'll strap you into a fishing chair
808
00:46:13,897 --> 00:46:15,816
and let you hook into
a 1,000-pound blue marlin.
809
00:46:15,899 --> 00:46:19,653
Buddy, you're gonna know what
fishing's all about with a capital "F".
810
00:46:19,736 --> 00:46:20,964
You'll have to excuse
my brother-in-law.
811
00:46:20,988 --> 00:46:23,633
He gets a couple cocktails into him,
he becomes an expert on everything.
812
00:46:23,657 --> 00:46:26,243
I don't need cocktails for that.
Was that a shot?
813
00:46:26,326 --> 00:46:27,453
No, that was the truth.
814
00:46:27,536 --> 00:46:28,829
That was a shot!
815
00:46:28,912 --> 00:46:30,122
That was a shot.
816
00:46:30,205 --> 00:46:31,915
Speaking of shots, set us up.
817
00:46:34,084 --> 00:46:35,127
This guy's a riot.
818
00:46:35,210 --> 00:46:37,171
- Isn't he, though?
- Everybody loves him, right?
819
00:46:37,254 --> 00:46:38,881
Yeah, yeah.
820
00:46:38,964 --> 00:46:42,092
By the way, Herm, you make
a lot of tips on this job?
821
00:46:42,176 --> 00:46:43,469
Well, I do all right.
822
00:46:43,552 --> 00:46:44,863
Who's handling your investments?
823
00:46:44,887 --> 00:46:46,930
My wife's got some egg money
put aside.
824
00:46:47,014 --> 00:46:49,975
But she's a real bear.
Won't give it up to me.
825
00:46:50,100 --> 00:46:52,120
Yeah. Well, I'll take her phone number.
I'll change that.
826
00:46:52,144 --> 00:46:53,455
Believe me,
that's what I do for a living.
827
00:46:53,479 --> 00:46:54,897
Investments is what I do!
828
00:46:54,980 --> 00:46:56,231
How you doing?
829
00:46:57,024 --> 00:47:01,487
Well, it ain't raining.
830
00:47:01,653 --> 00:47:04,656
It ain't raining so that's good.
831
00:47:04,740 --> 00:47:06,783
Yeah, I guess so.
832
00:47:06,867 --> 00:47:07,993
You fellows met Reg?
833
00:47:08,076 --> 00:47:10,621
I don't think so.
How you doing?
834
00:47:10,704 --> 00:47:12,748
Roman Craig.
Pleased to meet you.
835
00:47:14,082 --> 00:47:16,084
Chet Ripley.
How do you do?
836
00:47:17,336 --> 00:47:19,421
That's quite a hairdo
you got going there, Reg.
837
00:47:19,505 --> 00:47:21,840
- That a Neo-skunk thing or...
- Roman, what are you...
838
00:47:21,924 --> 00:47:23,943
- He's got the hair.
- You don't have to say anything.
839
00:47:23,967 --> 00:47:27,054
His hair turned white
'cause lightning hit him.
840
00:47:28,472 --> 00:47:32,017
He's been struck by lightning,
how many times is it now, Reg?
841
00:47:32,100 --> 00:47:35,604
Six.
842
00:47:36,021 --> 00:47:37,272
Six times!
843
00:47:37,356 --> 00:47:41,443
Sixty-six times
844
00:47:42,236 --> 00:47:47,908
in the head!
845
00:47:48,659 --> 00:47:51,203
Sixty-six times!
846
00:47:52,412 --> 00:47:54,706
God! That's gotta hurt!
847
00:47:55,290 --> 00:47:59,378
You'll never meet a guy more tuned into
the barometric pressure than Reg is.
848
00:47:59,461 --> 00:48:00,671
Yeah.
849
00:48:00,796 --> 00:48:04,049
You see him running like hell
for home, you head for cover.
850
00:48:04,132 --> 00:48:05,467
Right, Reg?
851
00:48:05,676 --> 00:48:08,613
Hey, buddy, you pay for the drinks.
I gotta go to the john. I'll be right back.
852
00:48:08,637 --> 00:48:11,181
Gonna introduce Mr. Thick Dick
to Mr. Urinal Cake.
853
00:48:11,265 --> 00:48:12,849
Aw, jeez, Roman,
do you have to be...
854
00:48:14,226 --> 00:48:17,980
What I really want to say
is thank you.
855
00:48:18,188 --> 00:48:20,732
This is very important
to Roman and me.
856
00:48:20,733 --> 00:48:22,276
I miss you, Connie.
857
00:48:22,359 --> 00:48:23,694
Oh, honey.
858
00:48:28,073 --> 00:48:30,867
It's so lonely being wealthy.
859
00:48:31,785 --> 00:48:32,995
I wouldn't know about that.
860
00:48:33,078 --> 00:48:37,416
No, no, I mean it, honey!
I mean it. It is lonely.
861
00:48:37,499 --> 00:48:40,711
He works terrible hours.
Travels.
862
00:48:42,170 --> 00:48:45,757
There'll be times we'll go a month
without going to bed together.
863
00:48:45,966 --> 00:48:48,510
Really, a month? That long?
864
00:48:48,594 --> 00:48:52,097
Sometimes I think
the only way I'll get any pleasure
865
00:48:52,180 --> 00:48:55,267
is by leaning against the washer
during the spin cycle.
866
00:48:56,476 --> 00:48:58,061
Does that really work?
867
00:48:58,270 --> 00:48:59,896
Have you ever seen
whiter whites?
868
00:49:05,652 --> 00:49:07,946
When do you go back to Chicago?
869
00:49:08,030 --> 00:49:10,616
Three days.
870
00:49:12,367 --> 00:49:16,288
You know, I've never had a boyfriend
for longer than two weeks.
871
00:49:17,372 --> 00:49:18,749
Get out of here.
872
00:49:18,874 --> 00:49:20,560
That's why I was such a bitch
to you that first night.
873
00:49:20,584 --> 00:49:21,668
No, you weren't a bitch.
874
00:49:21,752 --> 00:49:23,378
Yes, yes, I was.
875
00:49:23,462 --> 00:49:25,756
It's no big deal.
Don't worry about it.
876
00:49:25,922 --> 00:49:29,217
That's why I don't understand
what I'm doing here with you.
877
00:49:31,011 --> 00:49:33,930
Look, I've never even
had a girlfriend.
878
00:49:34,556 --> 00:49:36,642
I mean, I've dated girls,
but, you know,
879
00:49:36,725 --> 00:49:39,144
I never had one
I'd call my girlfriend.
880
00:49:39,728 --> 00:49:42,356
What would you call me?
881
00:49:42,439 --> 00:49:43,774
Officially?
882
00:49:47,194 --> 00:49:49,237
Ahem. Girlfriend?
883
00:49:50,906 --> 00:49:52,616
And you're leaving in three days.
884
00:49:52,699 --> 00:49:55,827
- See what I mean?
- Yeah.
885
00:49:56,411 --> 00:49:58,455
Well?
886
00:49:58,538 --> 00:49:59,873
Well what?
887
00:50:19,643 --> 00:50:21,853
What, what, what, what?
888
00:50:21,937 --> 00:50:22,979
It touched me!
889
00:50:23,063 --> 00:50:25,565
It's been touching you for 12 years!
You never freaked!
890
00:50:25,649 --> 00:50:27,651
- Not you!
- What?
891
00:50:27,734 --> 00:50:29,778
- A thing!
- What thing?
892
00:50:30,153 --> 00:50:33,448
What's going on, for God sakes?
What is it? What is it? What is it?
893
00:50:33,532 --> 00:50:35,242
That thing!
894
00:50:37,953 --> 00:50:40,288
It's just a little sparrow.
895
00:50:40,372 --> 00:50:42,499
Come on, Roman, it's got ears!
896
00:50:47,504 --> 00:50:50,716
Jesus Marie! It's a tiny flying mouse,
not a grizzly bear.
897
00:50:50,799 --> 00:50:53,218
I am not going back in there
until you get it out.
898
00:50:53,343 --> 00:50:54,392
All right. We'll get it
out. We'll get it out.
899
00:50:54,393 --> 00:50:55,393
- Chet?
- What?
900
00:50:55,470 --> 00:50:57,347
Run down to the shed,
get a shovel.
901
00:50:57,431 --> 00:50:59,725
Go in there
and get that radar-guided vermin.
902
00:50:59,808 --> 00:51:01,017
Yeah.
903
00:51:01,560 --> 00:51:02,561
Why me?
904
00:51:02,644 --> 00:51:04,813
Well, it's your cabin.
We didn't order one with bats.
905
00:51:04,896 --> 00:51:07,274
- Well, you stay here too, you know.
- You're the host.
906
00:51:07,357 --> 00:51:09,735
- So, what?
- Stop fighting and go, go, go kill it.
907
00:51:09,818 --> 00:51:11,087
I don't think we have to kill it, mom.
908
00:51:11,111 --> 00:51:12,863
- Kill it!
- No, Ben, it didn't do anything.
909
00:51:12,946 --> 00:51:14,489
It attacked me.
910
00:51:16,324 --> 00:51:18,410
Okay, he's wimping out.
I'll have to take care of it.
911
00:51:18,493 --> 00:51:20,722
I am not wimping, all right?
I'm just thinking, that's all.
912
00:51:20,746 --> 00:51:22,515
There's a big difference
between wimping and thinking.
913
00:51:22,539 --> 00:51:24,809
You want me to take care of the thing,
I'll take care of the thing.
914
00:51:24,833 --> 00:51:26,978
I was just wondering who was gonna do it.
I'll do it. I'll do it.
915
00:51:27,002 --> 00:51:28,128
I'll take care of it.
916
00:51:28,211 --> 00:51:30,756
Like to get some sleep.
That's what I'd like to do.
917
00:51:30,839 --> 00:51:32,549
Afraid of a little bat.
918
00:51:41,183 --> 00:51:42,350
So?
919
00:51:42,976 --> 00:51:45,687
It buzzed me.
We need a plan.
920
00:51:45,722 --> 00:51:48,064
It's bigger than I thought.
It's about a two-pounder.
921
00:51:48,148 --> 00:51:49,459
- Two-pounder?
- Yeah, big wings.
922
00:51:50,525 --> 00:51:52,444
It's got the teeth.
Terrible. It's frightening.
923
00:51:54,321 --> 00:51:57,324
I think we have to...
We have to do something.
924
00:51:57,657 --> 00:52:00,911
What we need, Roman, big plan, big plan.
That's what we need.
925
00:52:09,211 --> 00:52:11,922
We'll have this little baby
squealing mayday by midnight.
926
00:52:12,005 --> 00:52:14,049
All right. Let's split up.
927
00:52:20,722 --> 00:52:22,182
- Do you see him?
- He's hiding.
928
00:52:22,265 --> 00:52:23,767
- I know that.
- Turn out the lights.
929
00:52:23,850 --> 00:52:24,851
- Why?
- He's nocturnal.
930
00:52:24,935 --> 00:52:26,686
He'll think
it's daytime like this.
931
00:52:26,770 --> 00:52:28,146
Good point.
932
00:52:31,775 --> 00:52:32,901
Now we got him.
933
00:52:32,984 --> 00:52:35,695
Come on, you little
sonar-guided rodent.
934
00:52:36,947 --> 00:52:39,741
Connie, bats carry rabies,
don't they?
935
00:52:39,866 --> 00:52:41,993
- Yeah, among other things.
- What? Do they?
936
00:52:42,077 --> 00:52:44,496
I'm gonna call him.
I'm gonna call him now.
937
00:52:44,579 --> 00:52:46,248
Okay, okay, just be still.
938
00:52:46,331 --> 00:52:47,332
All right.
939
00:52:48,917 --> 00:52:50,669
Are you kissing him
or are you calling him?
940
00:52:50,752 --> 00:52:51,753
No, I'm calling him down.
941
00:52:51,837 --> 00:52:54,214
That's just the sound they make.
The high-pitched squeal.
942
00:52:54,297 --> 00:52:55,674
Okay, okay.
943
00:53:00,929 --> 00:53:02,848
Right there. Right there, Dad.
Look up! Look up!
944
00:53:05,225 --> 00:53:06,935
No.
945
00:53:09,771 --> 00:53:11,106
I got him!
946
00:53:15,986 --> 00:53:17,320
Think fast! Think fast!
947
00:53:17,404 --> 00:53:19,006
Get the light on him.
Get the light on him.
948
00:53:19,030 --> 00:53:21,116
Dad, keep your eye
on the bat, okay?
949
00:53:23,118 --> 00:53:25,120
Look at that thing move!
950
00:53:28,373 --> 00:53:30,792
Christ almighty!
Oh, jeez, my head!
951
00:53:31,126 --> 00:53:32,502
My head.
952
00:53:32,752 --> 00:53:33,879
Where is he? Where is he?
953
00:53:33,962 --> 00:53:36,065
- I don't know.
- He's in the rafters. He's refueling!
954
00:53:36,089 --> 00:53:37,340
Where are you?
Where are you?
955
00:53:37,424 --> 00:53:39,259
Right here!
956
00:53:39,342 --> 00:53:40,622
He's on my face!
He's on my face!
957
00:53:40,677 --> 00:53:42,053
Hold still!
958
00:53:44,097 --> 00:53:45,223
Honey.
959
00:53:45,307 --> 00:53:46,641
We got it!
960
00:53:47,309 --> 00:53:48,685
We got it!
961
00:53:48,768 --> 00:53:49,769
The pain.
962
00:53:49,853 --> 00:53:51,104
Chet, we got it.
963
00:53:52,272 --> 00:53:53,732
Ooh, that had to hurt.
964
00:53:55,317 --> 00:53:56,735
What a fighter.
965
00:53:56,818 --> 00:54:00,030
Boy, he was something!
I salute him!
966
00:54:01,364 --> 00:54:04,159
But we gotta get some sleep.
967
00:54:15,670 --> 00:54:16,713
Hey.
968
00:54:17,213 --> 00:54:18,798
- Glad to see you.
- Yeah.
969
00:54:18,882 --> 00:54:20,192
What time do you
get off work tonight?
970
00:54:20,216 --> 00:54:21,217
8:00.
971
00:54:21,343 --> 00:54:22,552
Great, I'll meet you at 9.00.
972
00:54:22,636 --> 00:54:24,012
Okay. Where?
973
00:54:24,512 --> 00:54:26,306
I don't know.
You're the one who lives here.
974
00:54:26,389 --> 00:54:27,891
The bait shop?
975
00:54:28,350 --> 00:54:29,434
Sure.
976
00:54:30,018 --> 00:54:31,728
I'll buy you some worms.
977
00:54:32,646 --> 00:54:34,272
You won't ditch me?
978
00:54:34,356 --> 00:54:36,775
Wait a second.
Why would I ditch you?
979
00:54:36,858 --> 00:54:39,778
I don't know.
I'm waiting for it to happen.
980
00:54:40,487 --> 00:54:41,947
Look, if I ditch you,
981
00:54:42,030 --> 00:54:45,784
you have my permission never to speak
to me as long as we both shall live.
982
00:54:45,867 --> 00:54:47,702
- Promise?
- Promise.
983
00:54:55,210 --> 00:54:56,628
I got to go.
984
00:54:57,462 --> 00:54:58,630
See you later.
985
00:54:58,713 --> 00:54:59,756
Bye.
986
00:55:02,926 --> 00:55:04,719
Yeah. That should do it.
Yeah.
987
00:55:04,803 --> 00:55:06,197
I think that's a good idea.
988
00:55:06,221 --> 00:55:10,058
All right. I'll have the Royal Canadian
Mounted beef barley soup.
989
00:55:10,141 --> 00:55:11,476
- Ooh! Yeah.
- Yeah.
990
00:55:11,559 --> 00:55:13,812
And then that bucket of salad.
991
00:55:13,895 --> 00:55:14,914
I'll split that with you.
992
00:55:14,938 --> 00:55:15,939
- You will?
- Yeah.
993
00:55:16,022 --> 00:55:17,333
All right, do that.
That would help.
994
00:55:17,357 --> 00:55:18,566
And then the...
995
00:55:18,650 --> 00:55:20,318
I guess the medley of perch.
996
00:55:20,402 --> 00:55:22,028
That's my favorite.
997
00:55:22,487 --> 00:55:23,905
- Okay.
- Miss?
998
00:55:24,280 --> 00:55:26,825
What's the Old '96er?
999
00:55:26,908 --> 00:55:30,495
That's our world-famous
Paul Bunyan's Blue Ox Steak.
1000
00:55:30,578 --> 00:55:33,748
It is a 96-ounce
prime-aged beef steak.
1001
00:55:33,832 --> 00:55:38,086
And if you or any member of your party
orders the Old '96er and finishes,
1002
00:55:38,211 --> 00:55:40,088
everybody eats for free.
1003
00:55:40,255 --> 00:55:41,423
Not bad, huh?
1004
00:55:41,506 --> 00:55:42,590
Want to go for it, girls?
1005
00:55:42,674 --> 00:55:44,592
Roman.
1006
00:55:44,676 --> 00:55:45,677
How about you, Chet?
1007
00:55:45,760 --> 00:55:46,988
People seem to like that.
1008
00:55:47,012 --> 00:55:48,364
- I'll try it. What the heck.
- Okay, great.
1009
00:55:48,388 --> 00:55:49,407
Yeah, it sounds good.
1010
00:55:49,431 --> 00:55:51,307
Seriously, though,
has anybody ever eaten one?
1011
00:55:51,391 --> 00:55:54,978
Oh, no. No.
Not in my lifetime, no.
1012
00:56:17,417 --> 00:56:18,793
Bon appetit.
1013
00:56:19,669 --> 00:56:21,171
Good God.
1014
00:56:22,756 --> 00:56:25,091
- Look at that.
- Check it out.
1015
00:57:03,171 --> 00:57:04,547
How is he?
1016
00:57:07,634 --> 00:57:10,720
That's good. Processing nicely.
Processing very, very good.
1017
00:57:10,804 --> 00:57:12,555
All right, continue.
1018
00:57:28,446 --> 00:57:29,697
All right.
1019
00:57:29,781 --> 00:57:31,533
I did it.
1020
00:57:36,913 --> 00:57:38,540
I think that just about does it.
1021
00:57:38,623 --> 00:57:39,916
He's not done yet.
1022
00:57:39,999 --> 00:57:42,839
Well, he may take a little while
with that last bite, but it'll go down.
1023
00:57:42,877 --> 00:57:44,254
That ain't the last bite.
1024
00:57:44,337 --> 00:57:45,334
Well, sure it is.
1025
00:57:45,335 --> 00:57:48,383
There's nothing on that plate
but gristle and fat.
1026
00:57:50,218 --> 00:57:51,636
Oh, God, no.
1027
00:57:51,970 --> 00:57:53,263
No problem.
1028
00:57:53,346 --> 00:57:55,098
Listen, if can I get a dessert down him,
1029
00:57:55,181 --> 00:57:58,351
you think you could throw in a couple
of Paul Bunyan hats for the kids?
1030
00:58:04,274 --> 00:58:05,275
Mind if I go now?
1031
00:58:05,358 --> 00:58:08,069
They'll be telling
their grandkids about this.
1032
00:58:08,153 --> 00:58:09,672
Oh, boy! What a night, huh?
1033
00:58:09,696 --> 00:58:10,989
Okay, but don't be too late.
1034
00:58:11,072 --> 00:58:12,323
Where's he going?
1035
00:58:13,533 --> 00:58:14,764
That Jimbo's not a bad guy.
1036
00:58:14,765 --> 00:58:16,953
I just had a word with him.
Here's the kicker.
1037
00:58:52,614 --> 00:58:53,698
Shit!
1038
00:59:12,300 --> 00:59:13,635
Oh, my God.
1039
00:59:13,885 --> 00:59:15,053
Oh, jeez.
1040
00:59:16,262 --> 00:59:18,848
Look at the size
of the maggots on that meat.
1041
00:59:21,392 --> 00:59:22,727
Oh, honey.
1042
00:59:32,403 --> 00:59:33,738
Oh, my God.
Honey.
1043
00:59:35,531 --> 00:59:38,493
Let's go, everybody,
move it out. It's 5 a.m.
1044
00:59:38,576 --> 00:59:41,287
Fishing boat's shoving off in 15 minutes.
1045
00:59:44,457 --> 00:59:46,310
These are the biggest worms
I've ever encountered.
1046
00:59:46,334 --> 00:59:47,853
They're not worms,
they're leeches.
1047
00:59:49,003 --> 00:59:50,981
Jesus! I am not touching leeches, Dad.
No way.
1048
00:59:51,005 --> 00:59:52,107
Cut it out, will you?
They don't bite.
1049
00:59:52,131 --> 00:59:53,591
No. They suck blood.
1050
00:59:53,675 --> 00:59:54,926
Would you watch the hook?
1051
00:59:55,009 --> 00:59:56,111
Dad, that's my hook.
1052
00:59:56,135 --> 00:59:57,529
Where's the bins?
Where's the flashlights?
1053
00:59:57,553 --> 00:59:58,781
- I don't know.
- Right over there, behind you.
1054
00:59:58,805 --> 00:59:59,925
You owe me big for this one.
1055
01:00:02,850 --> 01:00:05,311
Very funny, very funny.
Gimme a leech, will you?
1056
01:00:05,395 --> 01:00:06,437
Sick, God.
1057
01:00:06,521 --> 01:00:07,897
Has everybody got their leech?
1058
01:00:07,981 --> 01:00:08,982
Yeah.
1059
01:00:09,065 --> 01:00:11,985
Okay. All right. On the count of three,
insert your hook. Ready?
1060
01:00:12,068 --> 01:00:14,904
One, two, three.
1061
01:00:17,198 --> 01:00:18,449
Oh, God!
1062
01:00:47,687 --> 01:00:49,063
May I speak with Cammie, please?
1063
01:00:49,188 --> 01:00:50,523
Yeah, hold on just a minute.
1064
01:00:50,606 --> 01:00:52,108
Cammie, phone.
1065
01:00:53,568 --> 01:00:56,568
Okay. Cammie's really busy waiting on cars
right now. May I take a message?
1066
01:00:58,865 --> 01:01:01,451
All right.
Just please tell her that Buck called.
1067
01:01:01,909 --> 01:01:03,911
Okay, fine, Buck.
Goodbye.
1068
01:01:17,592 --> 01:01:18,593
Now what are you up to?
1069
01:01:18,676 --> 01:01:20,136
What does it look like I'm up to?
1070
01:01:20,219 --> 01:01:22,013
It looks like you're wanking
your crank.
1071
01:01:22,096 --> 01:01:23,931
I'm trying to build a fire, all right?
1072
01:01:24,015 --> 01:01:25,576
You might as well
pour ice cubes in there.
1073
01:01:25,600 --> 01:01:26,952
You'll never get a fire going
that way.
1074
01:01:26,976 --> 01:01:30,396
You don't crumple a newspaper up.
You twist it. Twist it.
1075
01:01:30,480 --> 01:01:32,148
Lengthwise to simulate kindling.
1076
01:01:32,231 --> 01:01:34,525
That's the way you get it going.
1077
01:01:34,609 --> 01:01:36,861
Maybe, Roman, just maybe
1078
01:01:37,153 --> 01:01:39,405
I'm trying to heat up the flue.
1079
01:01:39,947 --> 01:01:41,627
He's heating the flue.
1080
01:01:41,699 --> 01:01:44,869
Meanwhile the human beings
in the room are freezing to death.
1081
01:01:44,952 --> 01:01:47,288
I'm really not cold.
Not at all.
1082
01:01:47,538 --> 01:01:49,499
Thank you for sharing that.
Thank you.
1083
01:01:49,582 --> 01:01:52,752
I'm so sorry, Roman.
Forgive me.
1084
01:01:53,086 --> 01:01:55,421
Why don't you come over here
and show me how to do it?
1085
01:01:55,505 --> 01:01:56,714
You talk a great game.
1086
01:01:56,798 --> 01:02:00,551
Come over. Let's see a little action.
After all, you know everything.
1087
01:02:00,635 --> 01:02:03,721
You know exactly what to do
at any given moment.
1088
01:02:04,013 --> 01:02:05,324
Katie, you were absolutely right.
1089
01:02:05,348 --> 01:02:08,267
We should have gone to Europe.
Or maybe even Haiti, or Antarctica.
1090
01:02:08,351 --> 01:02:11,312
Or the Dead Sea.
Would've had a lot more fun!
1091
01:02:12,230 --> 01:02:13,773
Is that a fact?
1092
01:02:13,898 --> 01:02:17,026
Well, nobody forced you
to come up here, buddy boy.
1093
01:02:17,110 --> 01:02:21,239
As a matter of fact, I don't remember
anybody inviting you up here.
1094
01:02:21,823 --> 01:02:23,991
Do you remember inviting him?
1095
01:02:25,410 --> 01:02:27,203
I sure as hell don't.
1096
01:02:27,829 --> 01:02:30,415
And what exactly is that
statement supposed to mean?
1097
01:02:30,498 --> 01:02:31,874
You figure it out for yourself.
1098
01:02:31,958 --> 01:02:35,169
No, no, no, you specify,
you clarify it for me. All right?
1099
01:02:35,253 --> 01:02:37,380
Just as a common courtesy,
if you don't mind.
1100
01:02:37,463 --> 01:02:38,965
You know damn well what he means.
1101
01:02:39,048 --> 01:02:41,676
I think they're trying to say
that we're not welcome.
1102
01:02:41,759 --> 01:02:43,970
Aha! What did I hear?
1103
01:02:44,429 --> 01:02:46,514
We've got a bingo!
1104
01:02:46,722 --> 01:02:48,808
You did figure it out, Kate.
1105
01:02:48,891 --> 01:02:53,229
So, now it's all starting to ooze out.
It's very interesting, isn't it, Katie?
1106
01:02:53,396 --> 01:02:54,897
Yeah, very.
1107
01:02:55,523 --> 01:02:57,733
Especially since we threw aside
our plans.
1108
01:02:57,817 --> 01:02:59,735
And we had a great European
vacation planned.
1109
01:02:59,819 --> 01:03:01,487
Threw aside our plans
to come up here,
1110
01:03:01,571 --> 01:03:05,616
to show these dead asses
how to start to learn to have a good time.
1111
01:03:05,700 --> 01:03:08,369
Thanks for ruining
my vacation, Ripley.
1112
01:03:08,828 --> 01:03:10,329
What was that?
1113
01:03:11,414 --> 01:03:13,749
Ruining your vacation?
Is that what you said?
1114
01:03:13,833 --> 01:03:15,209
Come on.
1115
01:03:16,210 --> 01:03:19,005
I don't believe...
I don't believe I heard you say that.
1116
01:03:19,088 --> 01:03:20,798
You'd better believe it!
1117
01:03:20,882 --> 01:03:22,300
Don't push it, Roman!
1118
01:03:22,383 --> 01:03:24,594
You ain't even seen pushing yet!
1119
01:03:24,677 --> 01:03:26,262
You know the trouble with you, Ripley?
1120
01:03:26,345 --> 01:03:27,364
You wouldn't know a good time
1121
01:03:27,388 --> 01:03:30,391
if it fell out of the sky, landed
on your face and started to wiggle.
1122
01:03:31,809 --> 01:03:34,854
You have an awful lot of nerve, Roman.
A lot of nerve.
1123
01:03:34,937 --> 01:03:37,190
It's served me well.
I'm the one with the Mercedes.
1124
01:03:38,524 --> 01:03:40,693
By the way, is it paid for?
1125
01:03:40,776 --> 01:03:42,528
Are you jealous, Chester?
1126
01:03:42,612 --> 01:03:43,905
Don't call me Chester!
1127
01:03:43,988 --> 01:03:47,050
Call me that one more time, you're gonna
go home with a dent in your forehead.
1128
01:03:47,074 --> 01:03:49,160
Yeah!
That'll be the day.
1129
01:03:49,243 --> 01:03:50,512
Would you like one to match his?
1130
01:03:50,536 --> 01:03:53,080
Hey, take your hands off her!
You wanna go right now?
1131
01:03:53,164 --> 01:03:55,583
Dad, Dad, Dad,
no one's denting anybody.
1132
01:03:55,833 --> 01:03:56,918
Thanks, Bucky.
1133
01:03:57,001 --> 01:03:58,628
Bite the big one, Uncle Roman!
1134
01:03:58,711 --> 01:04:00,838
Hey, don't talk to adults that way!
1135
01:04:00,922 --> 01:04:02,673
- Why not?
- Because it's rude.
1136
01:04:02,757 --> 01:04:04,759
Blow it out your ass.
1137
01:04:05,009 --> 01:04:07,070
Roman, why don't we just get out of here?
Come on, honey.
1138
01:04:07,094 --> 01:04:08,489
- Come on, girls, let's go.
- Very good idea.
1139
01:04:08,513 --> 01:04:11,766
Well, it's the first good idea
you've had since you've been here.
1140
01:04:11,849 --> 01:04:14,685
And by the way,
don't steal any of our stuff.
1141
01:04:14,769 --> 01:04:16,812
What stuff is there to steal?
1142
01:04:16,896 --> 01:04:18,147
We've got stuff!
1143
01:04:18,231 --> 01:04:19,482
You're a louse!
1144
01:04:19,565 --> 01:04:22,735
Well, go find yourself
a spin cycle.
1145
01:04:22,818 --> 01:04:25,321
Yeah, go find yourself
a spin cycle.
1146
01:04:26,447 --> 01:04:28,592
- What the hell is that supposed to mean?
- Never mind, honey.
1147
01:04:28,616 --> 01:04:29,676
All right, calm down, calm down.
1148
01:04:29,700 --> 01:04:30,701
Okay.
1149
01:04:30,785 --> 01:04:32,036
Dad?
1150
01:04:32,954 --> 01:04:34,038
Yes, Ben?
1151
01:04:34,121 --> 01:04:37,291
Does this mean we won't get
a Christmas present from Uncle Roman?
1152
01:04:37,375 --> 01:04:39,001
Blow it out your ass, Ben!
1153
01:04:39,085 --> 01:04:42,380
Okay, okay, okay. Nobody's blowing
anything out their ass. Okay?
1154
01:04:42,463 --> 01:04:44,298
What we're having here
is a little problem.
1155
01:04:44,382 --> 01:04:45,383
And your father and I...
1156
01:04:45,466 --> 01:04:48,052
It does not mean we don't love
Uncle Roman and Aunt Kate.
1157
01:04:48,135 --> 01:04:50,179
It just means that
we are having some emotions.
1158
01:04:50,263 --> 01:04:51,263
What it means...
1159
01:04:51,305 --> 01:04:53,575
What it means is I would like to blow
Uncle Roman out my ass!
1160
01:04:53,599 --> 01:04:54,600
That's what it means.
1161
01:04:54,684 --> 01:04:58,896
I don't want to hear anymore about
anyone blowing anything out their ass.
1162
01:04:58,980 --> 01:05:02,066
You might as well blow the whole family
out your ass while you're at it, Dad.
1163
01:05:02,149 --> 01:05:05,444
Ben, do you understand
what's going on here, son, huh?
1164
01:05:05,528 --> 01:05:07,714
Do you understand what your mother
and I are trying to say?
1165
01:05:07,738 --> 01:05:10,008
Aunt Kate and Uncle Roman
are incredible butt heads. Right?
1166
01:05:10,032 --> 01:05:11,075
Exactly.
1167
01:05:23,337 --> 01:05:26,507
All right, troops, mount up.
We're ready to roll.
1168
01:05:27,341 --> 01:05:28,843
You all packed?
1169
01:05:29,510 --> 01:05:31,846
Actually, I just took a moment
to think things over.
1170
01:05:31,929 --> 01:05:35,725
And I'm gonna tell you something
I had previously decided not to.
1171
01:05:36,142 --> 01:05:38,269
I came up here for a reason.
1172
01:05:39,520 --> 01:05:42,273
Chet, I came up here to talk
to you about an investment.
1173
01:05:42,356 --> 01:05:46,527
In fact, I'll be quite honest.
I came up to solicit $25,000 from you.
1174
01:05:46,611 --> 01:05:49,488
I knew it. I knew it. I knew it.
1175
01:05:49,572 --> 01:05:50,615
Hey, look.
1176
01:05:50,698 --> 01:05:52,533
A unique investment opportunity
came my way.
1177
01:05:52,617 --> 01:05:54,720
I'm sitting in the office
trying to figure out a short list
1178
01:05:54,744 --> 01:05:57,389
of the people I'm gonna bless
with this opportunity, and I say bless,
1179
01:05:57,413 --> 01:06:00,333
because this is so good and so sure,
it should be illegal.
1180
01:06:00,416 --> 01:06:01,792
And it probably is.
1181
01:06:01,876 --> 01:06:02,960
Well, it's not.
1182
01:06:03,044 --> 01:06:05,421
It's inside,
but it's not illegal.
1183
01:06:05,671 --> 01:06:08,549
Well, the upside is phenomenal,
the downside is zip.
1184
01:06:08,633 --> 01:06:10,152
As I was sitting there
thinking about people
1185
01:06:10,176 --> 01:06:12,887
I might want to involve in this venture,
well, your name came up.
1186
01:06:12,970 --> 01:06:13,971
Why?
1187
01:06:14,055 --> 01:06:16,140
Because you are blood.
You're family.
1188
01:06:16,223 --> 01:06:18,726
If a guy can't help his family,
what the hell good is he?
1189
01:06:18,809 --> 01:06:19,870
The fact of the matter is, Chet,
1190
01:06:19,894 --> 01:06:23,481
I came up here to offer you
a chance to make some really big money.
1191
01:06:23,564 --> 01:06:25,983
Well, it's funny
you didn't mention this before.
1192
01:06:26,067 --> 01:06:27,377
You didn't want to talk about money!
1193
01:06:27,401 --> 01:06:28,986
Oh, baloney!
1194
01:06:29,070 --> 01:06:30,547
Hey, look,
I was picking my moment.
1195
01:06:30,571 --> 01:06:32,698
You were picking your nose.
1196
01:06:35,660 --> 01:06:40,081
Now, there's no mystery here, Chet.
I know how you really feel about me.
1197
01:06:40,414 --> 01:06:41,916
- Do you?
- Yep.
1198
01:06:43,417 --> 01:06:45,312
And I knew that
if I was ever to give you something,
1199
01:06:45,336 --> 01:06:47,171
that you'd figure
there'd be strings attached.
1200
01:06:47,254 --> 01:06:48,506
Is that a fact?
1201
01:06:48,589 --> 01:06:50,383
Yeah, that's a fact.
1202
01:06:51,884 --> 01:06:53,427
At our wedding,
1203
01:06:54,970 --> 01:06:58,099
you were in the john
with Kate and Connie's dad.
1204
01:06:59,016 --> 01:07:00,434
You were talking.
1205
01:07:00,518 --> 01:07:04,313
Do you happen to remember
the substance of that conversation?
1206
01:07:04,480 --> 01:07:05,898
No, I don't.
1207
01:07:06,023 --> 01:07:07,608
Yeah? Well, I do.
1208
01:07:08,150 --> 01:07:10,277
It's one I'll never forget.
1209
01:07:10,611 --> 01:07:13,698
Because I heard you say,
and I quote,
1210
01:07:14,699 --> 01:07:17,785
"That Roman Craig
is a crooked son of a bitch".
1211
01:07:18,369 --> 01:07:20,788
The next time you stab
somebody in the back, Chester,
1212
01:07:20,871 --> 01:07:23,708
you better check
under the stalls for feet.
1213
01:07:24,375 --> 01:07:26,919
You know, you may think I'm made
out of armor and nails, man,
1214
01:07:27,002 --> 01:07:29,255
but I'm just like
any other human being.
1215
01:07:29,338 --> 01:07:32,341
And when I get cut, it hurts.
And that cut me.
1216
01:07:32,967 --> 01:07:34,468
And I hurt.
1217
01:07:36,595 --> 01:07:38,055
Roman, I'm...
1218
01:07:39,390 --> 01:07:40,933
I'm sorry. I...
1219
01:07:42,268 --> 01:07:44,311
I had a lot to drink that night.
1220
01:07:44,395 --> 01:07:48,649
And I really don't remember saying that.
But if you said I did,
1221
01:07:51,152 --> 01:07:52,319
then
1222
01:07:53,320 --> 01:07:54,655
I must have.
1223
01:07:57,491 --> 01:08:01,036
I apologize to you both.
It was a terrible thing to say.
1224
01:08:03,622 --> 01:08:07,001
Look, I don't hold grudges
and I don't have any hard feelings.
1225
01:08:07,084 --> 01:08:09,879
To show you I'm the kind of guy
that can forgive and forget,
1226
01:08:09,962 --> 01:08:13,758
well, I'd still like to offer you
a piece of that investment.
1227
01:08:15,217 --> 01:08:16,677
You're sweet.
1228
01:08:19,013 --> 01:08:21,682
I don't know what to say,
Roman. I... I...
1229
01:08:21,849 --> 01:08:23,851
I feel like a real idiot.
1230
01:08:25,227 --> 01:08:27,021
What exactly is
this thing again?
1231
01:08:27,104 --> 01:08:29,899
That's $25,000.
What's your cash position?
1232
01:08:31,901 --> 01:08:34,612
It isn't $25,000.
That's an awful lot of money.
1233
01:08:35,321 --> 01:08:37,156
Well, can you get it?
1234
01:08:37,990 --> 01:08:38,991
No.
1235
01:08:39,325 --> 01:08:42,953
I think
I can make an arrangement or two
1236
01:08:43,037 --> 01:08:45,080
at the bank on Monday,
if that's okay.
1237
01:08:45,164 --> 01:08:47,124
Hey, look,
now, whatever you want to do.
1238
01:08:47,208 --> 01:08:49,186
You can write a check now
for as much as you can cover.
1239
01:08:49,210 --> 01:08:51,879
I'll make up the difference,
and we'll square it away on Monday.
1240
01:08:51,962 --> 01:08:53,297
If that's okay with...
1241
01:08:53,380 --> 01:08:55,257
Is your checkbook in the purse?
1242
01:08:55,341 --> 01:08:56,425
Yeah.
1243
01:08:56,509 --> 01:08:59,053
Great. Okay.
Then that's fine.
1244
01:09:05,351 --> 01:09:06,894
- Bye.
- Goodbye.
1245
01:09:07,728 --> 01:09:10,731
Well, I think it's a real testament
to the strength of the family
1246
01:09:10,815 --> 01:09:13,818
that we can disagree
so vehemently,
1247
01:09:13,901 --> 01:09:17,613
and get on each other's nerves
so badly over the past week,
1248
01:09:17,738 --> 01:09:19,949
and still part on good terms.
1249
01:09:20,199 --> 01:09:21,575
Absolutely.
1250
01:09:23,202 --> 01:09:25,579
After all the disagreements
that you and Chet had,
1251
01:09:25,663 --> 01:09:28,541
you still thought to include him
in that investment.
1252
01:09:28,624 --> 01:09:31,752
And, you know, I thought it was
a wonderful moment of trust on his part
1253
01:09:31,836 --> 01:09:34,088
that he wrote you that check.
1254
01:09:34,213 --> 01:09:35,840
That's a lot of money for him.
1255
01:09:35,923 --> 01:09:39,635
From what I gathered from Connie,
it's probably half a year's salary.
1256
01:09:39,718 --> 01:09:43,347
I wouldn't be surprised if that
was Ben and Buck's college money.
1257
01:09:43,430 --> 01:09:45,015
You know, you have a knack with money,
1258
01:09:45,099 --> 01:09:47,118
and I think it's great
that you're sharing it with him,
1259
01:09:47,142 --> 01:09:50,354
and I think it's great
that he accepted your offer.
1260
01:09:50,437 --> 01:09:53,607
That he trusts you
with his financial well-being.
1261
01:09:54,316 --> 01:09:57,361
I hope this investment
really works out for them.
1262
01:09:59,238 --> 01:10:00,364
I gotta go back.
1263
01:10:00,447 --> 01:10:02,116
What, did you forget something?
1264
01:10:03,576 --> 01:10:05,703
Honey, you're scaring me.
Are you all right?
1265
01:10:05,786 --> 01:10:07,621
I'll be all right
once I settle this.
1266
01:10:23,304 --> 01:10:25,639
Roman, what are you doing?
1267
01:10:26,640 --> 01:10:28,601
- Katie, sit down.
- What?
1268
01:10:28,684 --> 01:10:32,313
Katie, you'll need to sit down
to hear what I have to say.
1269
01:10:34,106 --> 01:10:35,774
Gee, it's wet!
1270
01:10:35,858 --> 01:10:37,151
Hurry up!
1271
01:10:37,651 --> 01:10:38,944
Let's go.
1272
01:10:39,945 --> 01:10:41,572
Chet, I'm gonna level with you.
1273
01:10:41,655 --> 01:10:44,241
I'm a phony. I'm a fraud.
I'm a fake.
1274
01:10:44,992 --> 01:10:48,913
From my $15 imitation Bally slip-ons
to our replicated Rolexes.
1275
01:10:50,706 --> 01:10:53,709
We're broke, we're bankrupt,
we're busted.
1276
01:10:54,001 --> 01:10:55,502
We're busted?
1277
01:10:57,546 --> 01:11:00,758
We were living well, right?
Well beyond our means.
1278
01:11:02,384 --> 01:11:06,180
I'm full of shit, Chet.
I haven't been trading in over two years.
1279
01:11:07,348 --> 01:11:09,642
This deal came up. It looked good.
I got overextended,
1280
01:11:09,725 --> 01:11:13,187
couldn't meet my calls.
I lost my seat on the exchange.
1281
01:11:14,271 --> 01:11:16,357
I go to work every morning.
1282
01:11:17,107 --> 01:11:20,402
But now I wear a blue runner's jacket
and fetch coffee.
1283
01:11:20,486 --> 01:11:22,154
I lost everything.
1284
01:11:22,363 --> 01:11:26,116
Why didn't you tell me?
Did you think that I wouldn't understand?
1285
01:11:26,200 --> 01:11:28,118
Baby, I knew you'd understand.
1286
01:11:28,243 --> 01:11:31,264
I also knew you wouldn't let me come up
here and put the bite on Connie and Chet.
1287
01:11:31,288 --> 01:11:32,957
It was my only last hope.
1288
01:11:33,040 --> 01:11:34,667
Now, look, Roman.
1289
01:11:34,833 --> 01:11:37,336
Now, you know I never
turn my back on family.
1290
01:11:37,419 --> 01:11:39,838
I know.
That's why I came up here.
1291
01:11:40,881 --> 01:11:44,385
And by the way, that story about you and
your brother in the can at the wedding?
1292
01:11:44,468 --> 01:11:45,928
I made it up.
1293
01:11:48,514 --> 01:11:49,765
You what?
1294
01:11:50,808 --> 01:11:52,351
You made it up?
1295
01:12:00,818 --> 01:12:03,529
All right, all right.
I got it, I got it.
1296
01:12:07,116 --> 01:12:08,409
Oh, jeez!
1297
01:12:10,911 --> 01:12:11,996
Whoo!
1298
01:12:15,749 --> 01:12:17,418
What happened?
1299
01:12:17,710 --> 01:12:18,919
Power's out!
1300
01:12:19,003 --> 01:12:20,379
Where's the flashlight?
1301
01:12:20,462 --> 01:12:21,463
Chet?
1302
01:12:21,547 --> 01:12:23,173
What happened
to the lights, Dad?
1303
01:12:23,257 --> 01:12:25,801
You kids been fooling around
with the flashlight?
1304
01:12:25,884 --> 01:12:28,345
Look at this.
$110 for a lighter.
1305
01:12:28,429 --> 01:12:30,264
It doesn't even work.
1306
01:12:30,431 --> 01:12:32,182
Seventy-nine cents.
1307
01:12:33,392 --> 01:12:34,893
Whoa! Hot!
1308
01:12:35,060 --> 01:12:36,940
Boy, I haven't seen weather
like this for years.
1309
01:12:40,607 --> 01:12:42,735
Roman, where are the girls?
1310
01:12:45,571 --> 01:12:46,864
Have you seen them?
1311
01:12:46,947 --> 01:12:48,782
- Have you seen them?
- No.
1312
01:12:49,992 --> 01:12:52,345
All right, spread out. Let's
look for them. Let's all just...
1313
01:12:52,369 --> 01:12:53,969
They're hiding under a bed or something.
1314
01:12:57,708 --> 01:12:59,043
Come on, it's this way.
1315
01:12:59,126 --> 01:13:01,295
No, it's this way.
I remember.
1316
01:13:03,130 --> 01:13:04,882
Look for a big hole.
1317
01:13:09,720 --> 01:13:11,764
We'll find them, Katie.
We'll find them.
1318
01:13:11,847 --> 01:13:12,927
They're gonna be all right.
1319
01:13:12,973 --> 01:13:14,683
They'll be okay.
Don't worry about a thing.
1320
01:13:14,808 --> 01:13:17,829
I want you boys to stay here and look
after your mother and your aunt. All right?
1321
01:13:17,853 --> 01:13:18,854
We'll help you.
1322
01:13:18,937 --> 01:13:21,499
Don't give me any lip, okay? There's
too much lightning going on out there.
1323
01:13:21,523 --> 01:13:23,984
Here's the fence.
Here's the fence.
1324
01:13:25,652 --> 01:13:27,321
Hey, wait for me!
1325
01:13:28,322 --> 01:13:30,324
Cara! Mara!
1326
01:13:34,286 --> 01:13:35,496
Try this way.
Okay.
1327
01:13:37,164 --> 01:13:39,833
There we go.
There we go.
1328
01:13:40,667 --> 01:13:42,127
There we go.
1329
01:13:43,921 --> 01:13:45,339
Great.
1330
01:13:47,257 --> 01:13:49,051
I can't see anything.
1331
01:13:50,677 --> 01:13:52,179
Oh, neat!
1332
01:13:52,262 --> 01:13:54,640
No, I found it.
I wanna go first.
1333
01:13:54,723 --> 01:13:56,767
No, I wanna! I wanna!
1334
01:13:57,476 --> 01:13:58,644
Hello?
1335
01:13:59,770 --> 01:14:01,105
Hello?
1336
01:14:11,615 --> 01:14:13,200
Cara!
1337
01:14:13,450 --> 01:14:15,702
Mara! Girls!
1338
01:14:26,922 --> 01:14:29,591
Cara! Mara!
1339
01:14:29,675 --> 01:14:32,636
Girls! Cara! Mara!
1340
01:14:37,975 --> 01:14:40,477
Cara! Mara!
1341
01:14:40,936 --> 01:14:43,355
Help! Help!
1342
01:14:43,438 --> 01:14:45,399
Put your light up there.
1343
01:14:45,774 --> 01:14:47,109
There!
1344
01:14:47,651 --> 01:14:50,070
Girls! Girls, is that you?
1345
01:14:50,988 --> 01:14:52,030
Girls!
1346
01:14:52,114 --> 01:14:54,825
It's your Uncle Chet.
Are you all right?
1347
01:14:54,908 --> 01:14:56,535
Help!
1348
01:14:56,618 --> 01:14:58,662
We'll be right down.
Go on.
1349
01:14:58,745 --> 01:15:00,289
- Not me.
- What?
1350
01:15:00,622 --> 01:15:03,333
I'm claustrophobic. I get
in a closed-up space and I lock up.
1351
01:15:03,417 --> 01:15:05,252
- What if I lose it?
- You won't lose it.
1352
01:15:05,335 --> 01:15:06,097
What if I blow it?
1353
01:15:06,098 --> 01:15:08,088
- What are we gonna do?
- We gotta get some help.
1354
01:15:08,172 --> 01:15:10,883
We don't have time.
You can do it.
1355
01:15:11,383 --> 01:15:15,179
Roman, they're your children.
Be their father, for God sakes.
1356
01:15:15,345 --> 01:15:18,265
For the first time
in your life, be their father!
1357
01:15:18,348 --> 01:15:21,435
Now, come on.
Get in there and help your kids.
1358
01:15:24,438 --> 01:15:27,566
Girls, your dad will be right down.
Daddy's coming.
1359
01:15:27,649 --> 01:15:29,860
Let's go. Let's go.
You can do it. You can do it.
1360
01:15:29,943 --> 01:15:31,528
All right.
Okay, come on.
1361
01:15:31,612 --> 01:15:32,612
There you go.
1362
01:15:32,654 --> 01:15:35,616
I'm gonna go get a light
and some rope. Okay?
1363
01:15:35,866 --> 01:15:37,117
- Are you all right?
- Yeah.
1364
01:15:37,201 --> 01:15:38,619
Take it easy.
1365
01:15:38,702 --> 01:15:41,330
Don't think about anything
like tight places.
1366
01:15:41,413 --> 01:15:43,415
Like a submarine
or a coffin or anything.
1367
01:15:43,498 --> 01:15:44,875
Come back.
I'll be back.
1368
01:15:44,958 --> 01:15:46,460
You come back!
1369
01:16:01,808 --> 01:16:03,727
My little sweeties!
1370
01:16:05,145 --> 01:16:06,563
I love you.
I love you.
1371
01:16:13,111 --> 01:16:15,822
Chet!
Chet, they're all right!
1372
01:16:17,658 --> 01:16:19,660
"Apollo unicel..."
1373
01:16:21,203 --> 01:16:22,704
It's dynamite!
1374
01:16:22,829 --> 01:16:24,957
It's wet, old dynamite.
1375
01:16:26,667 --> 01:16:28,919
It's fine. It's fine.
1376
01:16:29,336 --> 01:16:31,505
Chet! Chet!
1377
01:16:34,591 --> 01:16:35,801
Ripley!
1378
01:16:36,677 --> 01:16:39,471
Okay. All right,
we wanna get outta here.
1379
01:16:39,596 --> 01:16:42,933
It's cold, it's wet, and you don't want
to stay here anymore, do you?
1380
01:16:43,016 --> 01:16:46,853
Okay, you hang onto Daddy
as tight as you can, all right? Okay?
1381
01:16:48,188 --> 01:16:49,564
Damn! Come on.
1382
01:16:53,193 --> 01:16:55,028
Big one. Big spider.
Big spider.
1383
01:16:55,445 --> 01:16:59,283
Okay, climb on, Cara.
Mara, get on your sister's back.
1384
01:16:59,866 --> 01:17:01,910
Okay, grab hold of my jacket.
1385
01:17:01,994 --> 01:17:04,246
Okay, hang on, okay?
Hang on tight.
1386
01:17:06,957 --> 01:17:08,292
My babies.
1387
01:17:21,096 --> 01:17:22,431
Which way?
1388
01:17:25,600 --> 01:17:28,437
Hang on. We're almost there.
Almost there.
1389
01:17:35,360 --> 01:17:37,279
Oh, jeez, damn!
1390
01:17:38,322 --> 01:17:39,573
Come on.
1391
01:17:42,701 --> 01:17:45,120
Go, Cara, go!
1392
01:17:58,467 --> 01:18:00,927
Let's just go back to the cabin.
1393
01:18:03,263 --> 01:18:06,266
Your mother's probably
worried sick about you.
1394
01:18:08,477 --> 01:18:09,936
Here we go! Okay.
1395
01:18:11,521 --> 01:18:13,273
Hang on. Hang on.
1396
01:18:15,442 --> 01:18:18,445
Roman! Girls! I'm back.
1397
01:18:18,862 --> 01:18:21,156
I got everything. I'm here.
1398
01:18:21,365 --> 01:18:23,033
I'll have you out in a second.
1399
01:18:23,116 --> 01:18:25,035
Just a minute. Hold on.
1400
01:18:25,285 --> 01:18:28,663
I'm sorry it took so long.
I'll explain it all later.
1401
01:18:29,581 --> 01:18:32,292
Just a sec. Get off me!
I've got a rope.
1402
01:18:33,043 --> 01:18:34,544
You'll be fine.
1403
01:18:34,628 --> 01:18:37,422
I'm gonna tie a loop
at the end of this thing, all right?
1404
01:18:37,506 --> 01:18:39,174
Then I'm gonna throw it down.
1405
01:18:39,257 --> 01:18:43,470
Then one at a time
I'll pull you up, okay?
1406
01:18:43,929 --> 01:18:45,555
Here comes the rope.
1407
01:18:45,639 --> 01:18:48,975
Watch your heads.
Here it comes!
1408
01:18:53,814 --> 01:18:56,024
All right.
Have you got it?
1409
01:18:59,069 --> 01:19:01,238
Okay. Okay, you got it?
Good. Good.
1410
01:19:01,321 --> 01:19:03,240
Okay. All right,
now you let me know
1411
01:19:03,323 --> 01:19:06,243
when you're ready to come up,
when you put it on, okay?
1412
01:19:06,326 --> 01:19:08,161
Then I'll pull you up.
1413
01:19:09,955 --> 01:19:11,790
All right. Fine.
You're ready. Okay.
1414
01:19:11,873 --> 01:19:13,875
All right, just a second.
1415
01:19:14,000 --> 01:19:16,795
Okay, girls, Uncle Chet's here.
1416
01:19:17,170 --> 01:19:18,296
Okay.
1417
01:19:18,672 --> 01:19:20,232
Roman, you could help on this,
you know.
1418
01:19:21,299 --> 01:19:22,592
All right.
1419
01:19:22,676 --> 01:19:25,512
One, two, three, go!
1420
01:19:27,097 --> 01:19:29,891
Whoa! Hey!
What the hell are you doing?
1421
01:19:30,976 --> 01:19:32,936
When I say "ready", huh?
1422
01:19:33,019 --> 01:19:34,771
When I say "ready".
1423
01:19:34,855 --> 01:19:37,023
All right. On "ready".
1424
01:19:37,941 --> 01:19:39,317
Here we go.
1425
01:19:41,069 --> 01:19:42,279
Come on.
1426
01:19:42,362 --> 01:19:43,697
Help out a bit, will you?
1427
01:19:45,699 --> 01:19:48,535
Here it comes.
We'll be going home soon.
1428
01:19:51,204 --> 01:19:54,207
Roman and I are gonna have
a talk a little later on, girls.
1429
01:19:54,291 --> 01:19:57,002
We're gonna talk about
helping people.
1430
01:19:57,335 --> 01:20:00,881
Okay, here we go now.
Everybody help Uncle Chet.
1431
01:20:01,131 --> 01:20:02,716
Come on! Yeah!
1432
01:20:05,719 --> 01:20:07,179
We did it!
1433
01:20:07,429 --> 01:20:08,722
I did it!
1434
01:20:18,565 --> 01:20:20,400
A bald-headed bear!
1435
01:20:20,901 --> 01:20:22,152
Whoa!
1436
01:20:48,929 --> 01:20:50,013
Whoa!
1437
01:20:51,264 --> 01:20:52,516
Big bear!
1438
01:20:52,599 --> 01:20:53,934
Oh, my God!
1439
01:20:56,520 --> 01:20:59,314
I'm gonna die.
I'm gonna die. I'm gonna die.
1440
01:20:59,397 --> 01:21:02,150
No, no, go away.
Leave me alone!
1441
01:21:02,567 --> 01:21:03,777
Go away!
1442
01:21:06,780 --> 01:21:07,864
Help!
1443
01:21:08,281 --> 01:21:10,909
Help! Help!
1444
01:21:21,461 --> 01:21:23,421
Hey, he's back, everybody!
1445
01:21:24,881 --> 01:21:25,966
Chet!
1446
01:21:26,466 --> 01:21:27,467
Hi!
1447
01:21:28,301 --> 01:21:29,344
Where the hell were you?
1448
01:21:29,427 --> 01:21:31,596
Come on in.
I'm making you a sandwich.
1449
01:21:31,680 --> 01:21:34,266
Big! Big! Whoo, big!
1450
01:21:34,349 --> 01:21:36,059
Big? All right,
I'll make a big one.
1451
01:21:36,142 --> 01:21:37,310
Big bear!
1452
01:21:37,394 --> 01:21:38,645
Big bear.
1453
01:21:39,479 --> 01:21:42,357
No! True! True! Out there.
1454
01:21:42,440 --> 01:21:44,651
We're glad you're home, honey.
1455
01:21:44,943 --> 01:21:47,237
Big bear chase...
Big bear chase...
1456
01:21:47,320 --> 01:21:48,697
- What is he saying?
- What?
1457
01:21:48,780 --> 01:21:49,906
Big bear chase me!
1458
01:21:49,990 --> 01:21:51,074
Whoo!
1459
01:21:58,498 --> 01:22:00,500
Upstairs! There's a bear!
1460
01:22:06,172 --> 01:22:09,175
Get off me.
Get off, you son of a bitch.
1461
01:22:10,927 --> 01:22:12,637
Roman. Roman.
1462
01:22:17,183 --> 01:22:19,352
Uncle! Uncle! Uncle!
1463
01:22:22,522 --> 01:22:24,691
My God! Protect us!
1464
01:22:28,236 --> 01:22:29,362
Mom.
1465
01:22:35,493 --> 01:22:36,828
Oh, honey!
1466
01:22:38,038 --> 01:22:40,248
Connie, stay down!
Stay down!
1467
01:22:52,093 --> 01:22:54,387
Hit him with the poker!
Hit him!
1468
01:23:00,727 --> 01:23:02,354
Look out, Roman!
1469
01:23:10,236 --> 01:23:12,822
Big bear. Big bear chase me.
1470
01:23:21,122 --> 01:23:22,415
Chase me!
1471
01:23:35,220 --> 01:23:36,262
Thank God you're here.
1472
01:23:36,346 --> 01:23:37,531
- Yeah, I'm here.
- Thank God you're here.
1473
01:23:37,555 --> 01:23:39,182
Shoot him! Shoot him!
1474
01:23:39,265 --> 01:23:40,308
That's a goddamn lamp!
1475
01:23:40,392 --> 01:23:41,643
But it's loaded.
1476
01:23:41,726 --> 01:23:43,853
I can't hold on much longer!
1477
01:23:50,443 --> 01:23:52,070
Shoot him!
1478
01:23:53,613 --> 01:23:54,823
Right in the...
1479
01:24:14,092 --> 01:24:15,677
Okay, let's roll!
All right.
1480
01:24:15,760 --> 01:24:18,596
I can't believe that
I'm actually gonna miss this place.
1481
01:24:18,680 --> 01:24:20,056
Uncle Chet?
1482
01:24:20,181 --> 01:24:21,307
Yes, sweetheart?
1483
01:24:21,391 --> 01:24:23,309
I had a really good time.
1484
01:24:23,393 --> 01:24:24,853
Oh, well, I'm glad.
1485
01:24:24,936 --> 01:24:26,563
Thanks, Uncle Chet.
1486
01:24:26,646 --> 01:24:28,773
My pleasure, sweetheart.
I hope you had a great time.
1487
01:24:28,857 --> 01:24:32,318
'Cause we had a nice time having you,
and we're gonna miss you.
1488
01:24:32,402 --> 01:24:33,570
Will I see you soon?
1489
01:24:33,653 --> 01:24:36,072
And don't drive too fast.
All right.
1490
01:24:36,156 --> 01:24:38,158
Take your seats, in the trunk.
1491
01:24:38,241 --> 01:24:40,785
Roman, knock it off.
1492
01:24:42,537 --> 01:24:44,664
Cammie, if you're out there,
1493
01:24:45,707 --> 01:24:49,252
I just want you to know
I don't blame you for hating me.
1494
01:24:49,836 --> 01:24:52,922
Do city boys
always talk to themselves?
1495
01:24:59,679 --> 01:25:01,347
Look, I'm really sorry.
1496
01:25:02,182 --> 01:25:06,144
I want you to go back to Chicago
a crazed, lovesick maniac
1497
01:25:06,227 --> 01:25:10,440
who won't be able to look at another girl
without comparing her to me.
1498
01:25:10,523 --> 01:25:12,192
Sounds good to me.
1499
01:25:17,697 --> 01:25:20,116
You're a good man.
You're the best.
1500
01:25:20,241 --> 01:25:22,368
You're not so bad yourself.
1501
01:25:23,411 --> 01:25:25,038
You drive safely.
1502
01:25:25,580 --> 01:25:26,790
Thanks.
1503
01:25:27,332 --> 01:25:29,334
- Race you home.
- You got it.
1504
01:25:32,170 --> 01:25:33,671
"Race you home".
1505
01:25:35,465 --> 01:25:36,800
Take care!
1506
01:25:38,676 --> 01:25:40,720
Bye, bye.
1507
01:25:44,265 --> 01:25:45,767
"Race you home".
1508
01:25:48,770 --> 01:25:50,313
Why would he say "race me home"?
1509
01:25:50,396 --> 01:25:52,124
I mean, he lives
way the hell out in Oak Park.
1510
01:25:52,148 --> 01:25:54,317
It's just till he gets on his feet, honey.
1511
01:25:54,400 --> 01:25:57,904
I think you should be proud of him
not wanting to take your loan.
1512
01:25:58,404 --> 01:26:00,031
What are you saying?
1513
01:26:00,114 --> 01:26:01,994
- What are you saying?
- We have plenty of room.
1514
01:26:02,033 --> 01:26:03,493
- Connie.
- If he beats us...
1515
01:26:03,576 --> 01:26:04,720
He is not staying at our house.
1516
01:26:04,744 --> 01:26:08,081
Honey, if he beats us, he'll
get the good spot in the garage!
1517
01:26:08,164 --> 01:26:09,332
Dad, to the memories.
1518
01:26:09,415 --> 01:26:11,000
To the memories.
1519
01:26:12,585 --> 01:26:14,212
- Chester!
- Buckley!
1520
01:26:14,796 --> 01:26:16,756
Get the hell in the car.
We gotta beat Uncle Roman home.
1521
01:26:16,757 --> 01:26:17,507
Move it! Move it!
1522
01:26:17,590 --> 01:26:19,217
Move it, everybody!
Let's go!
1523
01:26:19,300 --> 01:26:20,927
One, two, three
1524
01:26:24,097 --> 01:26:26,641
Ow! Uh!
1525
01:26:26,724 --> 01:26:29,561
All right, uh!
1526
01:26:29,727 --> 01:26:31,896
You got to know how to pony
1527
01:26:32,730 --> 01:26:34,482
Like Bony Maronie
1528
01:26:35,608 --> 01:26:37,360
Mashed Potato
1529
01:26:38,361 --> 01:26:39,779
Do the Alligator
1530
01:26:40,822 --> 01:26:42,949
Put your hands on your hips, yeah
1531
01:26:43,616 --> 01:26:45,368
Let your backbone slip
1532
01:26:46,578 --> 01:26:48,121
Do the Watusi
1533
01:26:48,997 --> 01:26:51,040
Like my little Lucy
1534
01:26:51,624 --> 01:26:54,544
Ow! Uh!
1535
01:26:55,003 --> 01:26:56,838
Naa-Na-Na-Na-Na
1536
01:26:56,921 --> 01:27:00,884
Na-Na-Na-Na, Na-Na-Na, Na-Na-Na
Na-Na-Na-naa
1537
01:27:00,967 --> 01:27:03,094
I need somebody to help me
say it one time
1538
01:27:03,177 --> 01:27:05,138
Naa-Na-Na-Na-Na
1539
01:27:05,221 --> 01:27:07,974
Naa-Na-Na-Na, Na-Na-Na-Na
Na-Na-Na
1540
01:27:08,057 --> 01:27:09,726
Na-Na-Na-Na
1541
01:27:09,809 --> 01:27:12,061
Whoa!
1542
01:27:32,832 --> 01:27:35,752
Ow! Uh!
1543
01:27:35,835 --> 01:27:38,046
You know I feel all right, huh!
1544
01:27:38,338 --> 01:27:40,757
Feel pretty good, y'all, uh!
1545
01:27:41,841 --> 01:27:43,760
Naa-Na-Na-Na-Na
1546
01:27:43,843 --> 01:27:46,596
Na-Na-Na-Na, Na-Na-Na-Na
Na-Na-Na
1547
01:27:46,679 --> 01:27:48,097
Na-Na-Na-naa
1548
01:27:48,181 --> 01:27:50,058
Come on, y'all,
let's say it one more time
1549
01:27:50,141 --> 01:27:54,187
Naa-Na-Na-Na-Na, Na-Na-Na-Na
Na-Na-Na, Na-Na-Na
1550
01:27:54,270 --> 01:27:56,481
Na-Na-Na-naa
1551
01:27:56,564 --> 01:27:58,691
You got to know how to pony
1552
01:27:59,442 --> 01:28:01,194
Like Bony Maronie
1553
01:28:02,487 --> 01:28:04,238
Mashed potato
1554
01:28:05,073 --> 01:28:06,741
Do the Alligator
1555
01:28:07,700 --> 01:28:09,702
Put your hands on your hips, yeah
1556
01:28:10,411 --> 01:28:12,330
Let your backbone slip
1557
01:28:13,289 --> 01:28:14,916
Do the Watusi
1558
01:28:15,750 --> 01:28:17,794
Like my little Lucy
1559
01:28:18,586 --> 01:28:21,673
Ow! Uh!
1560
01:28:21,756 --> 01:28:23,508
Naa-Na-Na-Na-Na
1561
01:28:23,591 --> 01:28:27,804
Naa-Na-Na-Na, Na-Na-Na, Na-Na-Na
Na-Na-Na-naa
1562
01:28:27,887 --> 01:28:29,973
I need somebody to help me
say it one time
1563
01:28:30,056 --> 01:28:32,600
Naa-Na-Na-Na-Na, Na-Na-Na-Na
1564
01:28:32,684 --> 01:28:36,479
Na-Na-Na-Na, Na-Na-Na
Na-Na-Na-naa
1565
01:28:36,729 --> 01:28:39,023
Whoa!
1566
01:28:59,711 --> 01:29:02,588
Ow! Uh!
1567
01:29:02,672 --> 01:29:04,924
You know I feel all right, huh!
1568
01:29:05,341 --> 01:29:07,760
Feel pretty good, y'all, uh!
1569
01:29:08,720 --> 01:29:10,555
Naa-Na-Na-Na-Na
1570
01:29:10,638 --> 01:29:13,182
Naa-Na-Na-Na, Na-Na-Na Na-Na-Na
1571
01:29:13,266 --> 01:29:14,892
Na-Na-Na-naa
1572
01:29:14,976 --> 01:29:16,853
Come on, y'all,
let's say it one more time
1573
01:29:16,936 --> 01:29:18,855
Naa-Na-Na-Na-Na
1574
01:29:18,938 --> 01:29:21,691
Na-Na-Na-Na, Na-Na-Na Na-Na-Na
1575
01:29:21,774 --> 01:29:23,526
Na-Na-Na-naa
1576
01:29:23,609 --> 01:29:25,278
Whoa!
1577
01:29:25,361 --> 01:29:26,696
Went into the alley
1578
01:29:27,613 --> 01:29:29,240
With Long Tall Sally
1579
01:29:30,575 --> 01:29:32,201
Twistin' with Lucy
1580
01:29:33,244 --> 01:29:34,912
Doin' the Watusi
1581
01:29:35,830 --> 01:29:37,790
Roll over on your back
1582
01:29:38,666 --> 01:29:40,126
I like it like that
1583
01:29:41,627 --> 01:29:43,046
Do that Jerk, oh
1584
01:29:44,338 --> 01:29:46,132
Now watch me work, y'all
1585
01:29:46,966 --> 01:29:48,468
Ow! Do it
1586
01:29:49,886 --> 01:29:51,387
Ow! Do it
1587
01:29:53,014 --> 01:29:54,098
Do it