1 00:00:23,417 --> 00:00:26,500 She was the first girl to see me naked. 2 00:00:26,583 --> 00:00:28,291 Granted we were 7 years old at the time, 3 00:00:28,375 --> 00:00:31,875 but I had a feeling even then. 4 00:00:31,959 --> 00:00:34,226 There's really something about the first girl you play doctor with. 5 00:00:34,250 --> 00:00:35,625 Maybe it's cosmic or something, 6 00:00:35,709 --> 00:00:38,333 or perhaps it's just that she's seen your package 7 00:00:38,417 --> 00:00:40,333 and didn't run away screaming. 8 00:00:40,417 --> 00:00:43,917 Whatever it was, Allison and I were made for each other, 9 00:00:44,000 --> 00:00:45,083 a perfect fit. 10 00:00:45,166 --> 00:00:47,208 So when her family moved away, 11 00:00:47,291 --> 00:00:52,500 i... I knew that someday, somehow, fate would bring us back together. 12 00:00:54,291 --> 00:00:55,208 ♪ Happiness ♪ 13 00:00:55,291 --> 00:00:57,917 Berke. 14 00:00:58,000 --> 00:01:02,208 ♪ Happiness ♪ ♪ Berke landers ♪ 15 00:01:02,291 --> 00:01:04,250 It's me, Allison. 16 00:01:04,333 --> 00:01:06,250 Allison McAllister? 17 00:01:09,500 --> 00:01:12,542 Of all the lunchrooms in all the schools in all the world, 18 00:01:12,625 --> 00:01:15,917 that day, she walked into mine. 19 00:01:16,000 --> 00:01:17,583 It was the perfect romance. 20 00:01:17,667 --> 00:01:20,709 I was dating the most beautiful girl in school. 21 00:01:20,792 --> 00:01:24,250 And the cool part? We still played doctor. 22 00:01:24,333 --> 00:01:26,875 ♪ Happiness ♪ 23 00:01:26,959 --> 00:01:30,250 For the first time in my life, I was in love, 24 00:01:30,333 --> 00:01:32,208 and I knew it would last forever. 25 00:01:34,333 --> 00:01:36,000 Boy, was I a dumb-ass. 26 00:01:38,792 --> 00:01:40,500 We need to talk. 27 00:01:42,542 --> 00:01:47,291 Um, you know, everything in life, 28 00:01:47,375 --> 00:01:50,417 e... even the really great things, 29 00:01:50,500 --> 00:01:52,875 run their course eventually. 30 00:01:52,959 --> 00:01:54,208 Right? 31 00:01:54,291 --> 00:01:56,291 Trends fade. 32 00:01:56,375 --> 00:01:59,250 Bread molds. 33 00:01:59,333 --> 00:02:02,041 People die. 34 00:02:05,834 --> 00:02:08,750 I guess... 35 00:02:08,834 --> 00:02:11,959 Remember the first time we kissed? 36 00:02:12,041 --> 00:02:15,291 The feeling, the sparks? 37 00:02:15,375 --> 00:02:17,083 Yeah. 38 00:02:17,166 --> 00:02:20,917 Well, now when we kiss, 39 00:02:21,000 --> 00:02:22,083 the feeling, 40 00:02:22,166 --> 00:02:23,333 it's... it's kind of... 41 00:02:25,375 --> 00:02:27,208 It's kind of gone. 42 00:02:39,041 --> 00:02:40,542 And, berke? 43 00:02:44,709 --> 00:02:47,083 I packed up most of your stuff. 44 00:02:48,083 --> 00:02:49,417 I thought it'd be easier. 45 00:02:52,291 --> 00:02:53,625 Thanks. 46 00:03:17,458 --> 00:03:18,834 ♪ Love ♪ 47 00:03:18,917 --> 00:03:22,291 ♪ love will keep us together ♪ 48 00:03:22,375 --> 00:03:25,625 ♪ think of me babe whenever ♪ 49 00:03:25,709 --> 00:03:29,375 ♪ some sweet-talkin' girl comes along ♪ 50 00:03:29,458 --> 00:03:31,083 ♪ singin' a song ♪ 51 00:03:31,166 --> 00:03:34,417 ♪ don't mess around you just gotta be strong ♪ 52 00:03:34,500 --> 00:03:37,834 ♪ just stop 'cause I really love you ♪ 53 00:03:37,917 --> 00:03:41,542 ♪ stop I been thinkin' of you ♪ 54 00:03:41,625 --> 00:03:44,375 ♪ look in my heart and let love ♪ 55 00:03:44,458 --> 00:03:47,458 ♪ keep us together ♪ 56 00:03:52,083 --> 00:03:53,583 ♪ you ♪ ♪ you-doo-doo-doo ♪ 57 00:03:53,667 --> 00:03:55,583 ♪ you belong to me now ♪ 58 00:03:55,667 --> 00:03:56,834 ♪ doo doo-doo-doo ♪ 59 00:03:56,917 --> 00:03:59,250 ♪ ain't gonna set you free now ♪ 60 00:03:59,333 --> 00:04:00,250 ♪ doo-doo-doo ♪ 61 00:04:00,333 --> 00:04:04,041 ♪ when those girls start hangin' around ♪ 62 00:04:04,125 --> 00:04:05,542 ♪ talkin' me down ♪ 63 00:04:05,625 --> 00:04:08,709 ♪ hear with your heart and you won't hear a sound ♪ 64 00:04:08,792 --> 00:04:10,208 ♪ just stop ♪ ♪ stop ♪ 65 00:04:10,291 --> 00:04:12,375 ♪ 'cause I really love you ♪ 66 00:04:12,458 --> 00:04:13,625 ♪ stop ♪ ♪ stop ♪ 67 00:04:13,709 --> 00:04:15,959 ♪ I've been thinkin' of you ♪ 68 00:04:16,041 --> 00:04:18,458 ♪ look in my heart and let love ♪ 69 00:04:18,542 --> 00:04:22,417 ♪ keep us together ♪ 70 00:04:22,500 --> 00:04:24,709 ♪ whatever ♪ 71 00:04:26,500 --> 00:04:29,583 ♪ young and beautiful ♪ 72 00:04:29,667 --> 00:04:33,458 ♪ someday your looks'll be gone ♪ 73 00:04:33,542 --> 00:04:36,291 ♪ when the others turn you off ♪ 74 00:04:36,375 --> 00:04:38,417 ♪ who'll be turnin' you on? ♪ 75 00:04:38,500 --> 00:04:41,083 ♪ I will, I will, I will ♪ 76 00:04:41,166 --> 00:04:46,542 ♪ I will be there to share forever ♪ 77 00:04:46,625 --> 00:04:49,875 ♪ love will keep us together ♪ 78 00:04:49,959 --> 00:04:53,333 ♪ I said it before and I'll say it again ♪ 79 00:04:53,417 --> 00:04:55,125 ♪ while others pretend ♪ 80 00:04:55,208 --> 00:04:58,458 ♪ I need you now and I need you then ♪ 81 00:04:58,542 --> 00:05:00,291 ♪ just stop ♪ ♪ stop ♪ 82 00:05:00,375 --> 00:05:02,291 ♪ 'cause I really love you ♪ 83 00:05:02,375 --> 00:05:03,500 ♪ stop ♪ ♪ stop ♪ 84 00:05:03,583 --> 00:05:05,625 ♪ I been thinkin' of you ♪ 85 00:05:05,709 --> 00:05:08,291 ♪ look in my heart and let love ♪ 86 00:05:08,375 --> 00:05:12,083 ♪ keep us together ♪ 87 00:05:12,166 --> 00:05:13,417 ♪ whatever ♪ 88 00:05:13,500 --> 00:05:17,458 ♪ whatev... whatever ever ever ♪ ♪ I will, I will, I will ♪ 89 00:05:17,542 --> 00:05:20,458 ♪ I will ♪♪ ♪ 90 00:05:20,542 --> 00:05:23,458 ♪ la-da-da-dah ♪ 91 00:05:23,542 --> 00:05:27,083 ♪ dah-da-la-la ♪ 92 00:05:27,166 --> 00:05:30,000 ♪ dah-da-da-dah ♪ 93 00:05:30,083 --> 00:05:33,458 ♪ sedaka is back ♪ 94 00:05:33,542 --> 00:05:36,709 ♪ dah-da-da-dah ♪ 95 00:05:36,792 --> 00:05:39,542 Aaaaaah! 96 00:05:47,291 --> 00:05:50,333 My parents, frank and Beverly, they host the, 97 00:05:50,417 --> 00:05:52,851 relationship advice show love matters, 98 00:05:52,875 --> 00:05:54,500 Which sounds pretty cool... 99 00:05:54,583 --> 00:05:56,500 This maximizes the pleasure for both partners. 100 00:05:56,583 --> 00:05:58,333 Exactly, right, right, and, and 101 00:05:58,417 --> 00:06:01,208 while simultaneously allowing for face-to-face intimacy. 102 00:06:01,291 --> 00:06:02,768 Coolio knows what we're talking about. What do you think? 103 00:06:02,792 --> 00:06:05,709 You wanna take her for a spin? 104 00:06:05,792 --> 00:06:09,834 We'll be right back. 105 00:06:09,917 --> 00:06:11,197 Here are the cds you wanted, mom. 106 00:06:11,250 --> 00:06:12,500 Thanks, honey. 107 00:06:12,583 --> 00:06:13,685 You know, the guests get so cranky 108 00:06:13,709 --> 00:06:15,542 when you haven't heard their music. 109 00:06:15,625 --> 00:06:18,375 Now, you came home so early last night. 110 00:06:18,458 --> 00:06:19,542 Don't make it too flat. 111 00:06:19,625 --> 00:06:21,542 Is everything ok with Allison? 112 00:06:21,625 --> 00:06:23,917 No, not really. So maybe we can talk about it... 113 00:06:24,000 --> 00:06:26,542 Berke, you know the rule. 114 00:06:26,625 --> 00:06:29,208 When we're not feeling sunny, we... 115 00:06:29,291 --> 00:06:32,500 I don't really want to talk about it here. I believe the word is share. 116 00:06:32,583 --> 00:06:36,166 Frank, hon, apparently berke has a problem with Allison. 117 00:06:36,250 --> 00:06:39,667 What's the story, dude? A little snafu in the old channels of communication? 118 00:06:39,750 --> 00:06:41,542 Boundary issues? Codependency? 119 00:06:41,625 --> 00:06:43,208 No, it's, it's nothing like that. 120 00:06:43,291 --> 00:06:44,726 Five minutes, people. 121 00:06:44,750 --> 00:06:46,291 Sex. 122 00:06:47,625 --> 00:06:49,583 She dumped me. 123 00:06:49,667 --> 00:06:51,917 - Darling. - Aww! 124 00:06:52,000 --> 00:06:55,834 You poor baby! 125 00:06:55,917 --> 00:06:58,417 This probably isn't the best place to talk about this. 126 00:06:59,834 --> 00:07:03,583 ♪ You got to be insane ♪ 127 00:07:03,667 --> 00:07:05,583 ♪ that green Jesus ♪ 128 00:07:05,667 --> 00:07:07,542 ♪ you got to be insane ♪ 129 00:07:07,625 --> 00:07:09,625 ♪ that green Jesus ♪ 130 00:07:09,709 --> 00:07:11,417 ♪ you got to be insane ♪ 131 00:07:11,500 --> 00:07:12,875 ♪ that green Jesus ♪ 132 00:07:12,959 --> 00:07:14,583 ♪ you got to be insane ♪ 133 00:07:14,667 --> 00:07:16,792 ♪ that green Jesus ♪ 134 00:07:16,875 --> 00:07:18,583 ♪ you got to be insane ♪ 135 00:07:18,667 --> 00:07:21,583 I wanna go home. It's gonna be fine, man. 136 00:07:21,667 --> 00:07:23,041 It's gonna be better than fine. 137 00:07:23,125 --> 00:07:25,709 I mean, look at all this new and interesting... 138 00:07:25,792 --> 00:07:27,750 Hey, that's my sister! 139 00:07:27,834 --> 00:07:29,417 ♪ You got to be insane ♪ 140 00:07:29,500 --> 00:07:31,750 Hey, grabby hands, step away from the sister. 141 00:07:31,834 --> 00:07:33,625 ♪ You got to be insane ♪ 142 00:07:33,709 --> 00:07:36,583 Shouldn't you be at, like, a pajama jammy-jam or somethin'? 143 00:07:36,667 --> 00:07:38,625 What am I, a year younger than you? 144 00:07:38,709 --> 00:07:43,667 Not than anybody could tell from your birthday presents... pink rollerblades. 145 00:07:43,750 --> 00:07:45,792 It was a great gift. Sure. 146 00:07:45,875 --> 00:07:47,959 Can I help you? 147 00:07:48,041 --> 00:07:50,458 No. Come on, basin. 148 00:07:50,542 --> 00:07:53,059 There's a guy in the corner who says he'll Pierce our navels for free. 149 00:07:53,083 --> 00:07:55,417 Ooh! What? 150 00:07:55,500 --> 00:07:58,583 Ok, he's here. He's here. So? 151 00:07:58,667 --> 00:08:00,917 So I told him I was going out of town, Maggie. 152 00:08:01,000 --> 00:08:03,458 He's gonna freak when he finds out I'm here. 153 00:08:03,542 --> 00:08:05,625 Al, you're a free agent now. 154 00:08:05,709 --> 00:08:07,643 Don't you think he needs to start dealing with that? 155 00:08:07,667 --> 00:08:11,667 You should've seen the look on his face, Maggie. I mean, he was devastated. 156 00:08:11,750 --> 00:08:14,500 It's gonna take him a while to get over this. Allison? 157 00:08:14,583 --> 00:08:16,667 Are you sure you're over this? 158 00:08:19,417 --> 00:08:20,458 Allow me. 159 00:08:20,542 --> 00:08:22,125 ♪ Say yeah what do you want? ♪ 160 00:08:26,750 --> 00:08:29,917 Who was that? Ouch! 161 00:08:31,917 --> 00:08:33,875 Is this, like, your first time in the states? 162 00:08:33,959 --> 00:08:36,667 Well, lucky, right? 163 00:08:38,417 --> 00:08:40,625 Are you guys listening to this candy-ass? 164 00:08:40,709 --> 00:08:44,709 My father's in the foreign service, so I've spent the last few years abroad... 165 00:08:44,792 --> 00:08:47,500 Shanghai, ludwigshafen. 166 00:08:47,583 --> 00:08:48,601 In fact, when I was in Amsterdam, 167 00:08:48,625 --> 00:08:50,667 I toured a little bit with a little pop group 168 00:08:50,750 --> 00:08:52,709 called the swing town lads. 169 00:08:54,208 --> 00:08:56,125 You know, I knew he looked familiar. 170 00:08:56,208 --> 00:08:59,125 What's up with this accent? He sounds like Madonna. 171 00:09:01,583 --> 00:09:03,417 She's here. Who, Madonna? 172 00:09:04,792 --> 00:09:07,375 No. Allison. 173 00:09:07,458 --> 00:09:09,917 It's perfect. 174 00:09:10,000 --> 00:09:13,709 No, no, no, no, no, no, no. You are not going over there. 175 00:09:13,792 --> 00:09:17,709 You go over there, you might as well put your stick on a cracker. 176 00:09:17,792 --> 00:09:21,959 You know, it's still only gonna make you her bitch. You don't want that. It's bad! 177 00:09:22,834 --> 00:09:24,709 Felix, I've taken pisses 178 00:09:24,792 --> 00:09:27,000 longer than your last three relationships. 179 00:09:27,792 --> 00:09:30,500 Right you are. 180 00:09:30,583 --> 00:09:32,208 Thanks. You ok? 181 00:09:32,291 --> 00:09:33,709 Yes. Yeah. I think so. 182 00:09:33,792 --> 00:09:35,875 Yes, well, it's a tad rough-and-tumble out there. 183 00:09:35,959 --> 00:09:37,709 Glad I was here to catch you. 184 00:09:37,792 --> 00:09:40,166 I'm glad you were, too. 185 00:09:41,458 --> 00:09:43,750 Would you care to dance? 186 00:10:47,917 --> 00:10:50,000 She's not your girlfriend anymore, man. 187 00:10:50,083 --> 00:10:52,500 You know, maybe that's not such a bad thing. 188 00:10:52,583 --> 00:10:55,458 I mean, next year you guys'll be going to different schools. 189 00:10:55,542 --> 00:10:57,458 I mean, what were you gonna do, marry her? 190 00:10:57,542 --> 00:10:59,851 I mean, come on, who marries their high-school girlfriend, anyway? 191 00:10:59,875 --> 00:11:01,625 And don't say macaulay culkin. 192 00:11:01,709 --> 00:11:03,792 I think I'm gonna call her. 193 00:11:03,875 --> 00:11:06,000 No. Negative. 194 00:11:06,083 --> 00:11:08,458 Have some self-respect, man. 195 00:11:08,542 --> 00:11:10,917 You have called her 40 times already. 196 00:11:13,291 --> 00:11:15,291 Get outta my way! Shit. 197 00:11:16,291 --> 00:11:19,000 ♪ I, I stand at attention ♪ 198 00:11:19,083 --> 00:11:21,834 ♪ whenever you're near ♪ ♪ you're near ♪ 199 00:11:21,917 --> 00:11:25,709 ♪ full speed ahead girl 'cause it's clear ♪ 200 00:11:25,792 --> 00:11:30,166 ♪ that you are my luv s.C.U.D. ♪ 201 00:11:30,250 --> 00:11:32,375 He calls himself striker. 202 00:11:32,458 --> 00:11:36,875 "Luv s.C.U.D.?" 203 00:11:36,959 --> 00:11:39,208 So what did he say when he gave it to you? 204 00:11:39,291 --> 00:11:42,875 I don't know. He asked me out. 205 00:11:42,959 --> 00:11:47,291 Well, don't be so nonchalant about it, girl. 206 00:11:47,375 --> 00:11:50,542 I think that boy is razor fine. 207 00:11:50,625 --> 00:11:52,834 ♪ It's so funny to be seein' you ♪ 208 00:11:52,917 --> 00:11:54,142 Look, berke, don't go... 209 00:11:54,166 --> 00:11:55,750 ♪ After so long, girl ♪ my god. 210 00:11:55,834 --> 00:11:58,750 Berke, don't... don't... ♪ and the way you look I understand ♪ 211 00:11:58,834 --> 00:12:02,208 ♪ that you aren't impressed ♪ 212 00:12:02,291 --> 00:12:06,333 ♪ I heard you let a little friend of mine ♪ 213 00:12:06,417 --> 00:12:09,875 ♪ take off your party dress ♪ 214 00:12:09,959 --> 00:12:13,917 ♪ Allison ♪ 215 00:12:14,000 --> 00:12:16,761 I can't believe you dated that loser for a year. ♪ I know this world ♪ 216 00:12:16,834 --> 00:12:18,935 ♪ is killin' you ♪ Knock it off! We'll call the cops! 217 00:12:18,959 --> 00:12:20,875 ♪ Allison ♪ Did you hear that? 218 00:12:20,959 --> 00:12:22,750 The neighbors are screaming at you, berke! 219 00:12:22,834 --> 00:12:24,667 ♪ My aim is... ♪ Come on, let's go! 220 00:12:29,625 --> 00:12:31,208 Berke, your aim sucks. 221 00:12:34,208 --> 00:12:37,917 All right, a little to the left, Jessica... what direction do you think left is? 222 00:12:38,000 --> 00:12:40,017 See, because if you go with your instinct and reverse it 223 00:12:40,041 --> 00:12:41,309 I think we have something happening. 224 00:12:41,333 --> 00:12:45,542 How difficult is this? I... I'm so alone, I think. 225 00:12:45,625 --> 00:12:47,542 I am trying. You are intimidating me. 226 00:12:47,625 --> 00:12:50,375 Well, you are frightening me! Do you understand that? 227 00:12:50,458 --> 00:12:51,685 How do you get dressed in the morning? 228 00:12:51,709 --> 00:12:53,083 Do you have people that come in 229 00:12:53,166 --> 00:12:54,959 or you just lie in state? 230 00:12:55,041 --> 00:12:57,917 "A midsummer night's rockin' Eve?" 231 00:12:58,000 --> 00:13:01,625 Classical Shakespeare with a contemporary musical twist. 232 00:13:01,709 --> 00:13:06,083 Hello? My god! How did you get this number? 233 00:13:06,166 --> 00:13:07,434 You're kidding me! 234 00:13:07,458 --> 00:13:09,750 Ok, either that man has no taste 235 00:13:09,834 --> 00:13:10,875 or he completely hates us. 236 00:13:10,959 --> 00:13:12,917 I think it's a little of both. 237 00:13:13,041 --> 00:13:15,417 Lazario, how's that lobotomy workin' out for ya? 238 00:13:15,500 --> 00:13:17,458 Asi, asi. So what's with the smiling? 239 00:13:17,542 --> 00:13:20,125 A week ago you were mired in rejected drunk-guy mode. 240 00:13:20,208 --> 00:13:23,458 You pass the final or what? No, I got a 57. 241 00:13:23,542 --> 00:13:26,917 Ouch. Hello, ladies. 242 00:13:27,000 --> 00:13:29,959 I'm sorry, man. I mean, that's that's gotta suck. 243 00:13:30,041 --> 00:13:33,417 No, just a mild annoyance. See? Yeah! There you go. 244 00:13:33,500 --> 00:13:35,750 All right, you know, if she wants to screw around 245 00:13:35,834 --> 00:13:36,893 with that clown, let her, right? 246 00:13:36,917 --> 00:13:40,125 Yeah, for now, anyway. What's that supposed to mean? 247 00:13:40,208 --> 00:13:44,625 Well, if I'm gonna lose Allison, it's not going to be to a turd like that, right? 248 00:13:44,709 --> 00:13:46,667 ♪ I'm not upset ♪ 249 00:13:48,291 --> 00:13:50,726 You know, obviously, there's something about the guy Allison really likes. 250 00:13:50,750 --> 00:13:51,750 Yeah, obviously. 251 00:13:52,875 --> 00:13:54,750 Come on, landers, wake up out there! 252 00:13:56,291 --> 00:13:58,375 Fancy moves, crazy legs. 253 00:14:00,625 --> 00:14:03,208 In your face. God, there he is again. 254 00:14:03,291 --> 00:14:06,500 I don't know how you could take someone seriously with an accent like that. 255 00:14:06,583 --> 00:14:08,458 Berke, just face it, man. You're screwed. 256 00:14:08,542 --> 00:14:11,834 I don't think so. I think I can take this backstreet bitch. 257 00:14:23,917 --> 00:14:26,834 Nice trick, landers, catching the ball with your face. 258 00:14:26,917 --> 00:14:31,000 Next thing you know, you'll be shooting three-pointers with your ass. 259 00:14:31,083 --> 00:14:33,667 Berke. 260 00:14:33,750 --> 00:14:35,000 Berke, stop. Berke! 261 00:14:35,083 --> 00:14:39,041 Will you let me look at it, please? Just go back to practice. 262 00:14:39,125 --> 00:14:41,417 Berke, talk to me. 263 00:14:42,959 --> 00:14:47,917 I just don't understand how you can replace me with this guy. 264 00:14:48,000 --> 00:14:53,041 Berke, no one can replace you, you know? 265 00:14:53,125 --> 00:14:55,792 It's just... time to move on. 266 00:14:57,500 --> 00:15:01,333 So everything's just going great with this, this striker? 267 00:15:02,917 --> 00:15:04,875 No, it... it's just... 268 00:15:04,959 --> 00:15:08,208 Different, you know? I mean... 269 00:15:08,291 --> 00:15:11,041 He's not like other guys our age. You know? 270 00:15:11,125 --> 00:15:13,500 He's... he's sophisticated and... 271 00:15:13,583 --> 00:15:19,917 We're even gonna try out for... for the... the spring musical together. 272 00:15:20,000 --> 00:15:21,625 You hate theater. 273 00:15:23,542 --> 00:15:24,834 No, I don't. 274 00:15:27,291 --> 00:15:29,750 "Captain of the fairy band, 275 00:15:29,834 --> 00:15:33,083 Helena is close at hand." 276 00:15:33,166 --> 00:15:35,917 I'm understanding about every other word of this shit. 277 00:15:36,000 --> 00:15:38,250 Berke. Hey. 278 00:15:38,333 --> 00:15:42,083 What happened to your face? A long story. 279 00:15:42,166 --> 00:15:46,542 A midsummer night's dream? What, are you gonna try out for the show? 280 00:15:46,625 --> 00:15:48,041 Kinda, sor... maybe. 281 00:15:48,125 --> 00:15:53,125 Well, you know, if you're serious about it, I'm kinda good at that stuff. 282 00:15:53,208 --> 00:15:55,750 Really? Have you heard her songs? 283 00:15:55,834 --> 00:15:59,583 She's only like the next Josie Mitchell. Joni Mitchell. 284 00:15:59,667 --> 00:16:02,291 I... I could actually use some help. 285 00:16:02,375 --> 00:16:05,208 So tomorrow, coffee? 286 00:16:06,166 --> 00:16:09,625 Ok. Coffee would be great. Ok. 287 00:16:09,709 --> 00:16:11,792 Bye. Bye. 288 00:16:13,500 --> 00:16:16,083 "If you're serious, I'm kinda good at that stuff." 289 00:16:16,166 --> 00:16:17,583 Shut up! "Shut up!" 290 00:16:17,667 --> 00:16:19,851 Did you see Dennis staring at me again? What? I know. 291 00:16:19,875 --> 00:16:21,125 I told you. Totally. 292 00:16:21,208 --> 00:16:22,917 Ok, so the first thing we need to do 293 00:16:23,000 --> 00:16:26,166 is pick you out a monologue for your audition. 294 00:16:26,250 --> 00:16:28,208 Yeah, this is good. Lysander, right? 295 00:16:31,709 --> 00:16:34,059 "she sees not hermia. Hermia sleep thou there..." 296 00:16:34,083 --> 00:16:38,458 no, wait, no. You... you can't, like, run all the words together. It doesn't work like that. 297 00:16:38,542 --> 00:16:41,333 But that's ok. We'll... we'll start from the beginning, ok? 298 00:16:41,417 --> 00:16:43,166 It's... it's kind of hard to understand, 299 00:16:43,250 --> 00:16:46,959 but once you get into it, the story's actually kind of good. 300 00:16:47,041 --> 00:16:52,166 So, hermia, this girl here, she's very rich and beautiful 301 00:16:52,250 --> 00:16:55,333 and she lives with her overbearing parents in Athens. 302 00:16:55,417 --> 00:16:58,041 Now, hermia has everything a girl could ask for, 303 00:16:58,125 --> 00:17:03,333 cool clothes, nice complexion and her pick of pretty much any guy she wants. 304 00:17:03,417 --> 00:17:06,000 But of all the guys in the greater Athens area, 305 00:17:06,083 --> 00:17:09,166 hermia's heart belongs to the handsome young nobleman, lysander. 306 00:17:10,917 --> 00:17:14,625 This would all be perfect if it weren't for Demetrius. 307 00:17:14,709 --> 00:17:17,166 Hermia's father already promised her hand to him, 308 00:17:17,250 --> 00:17:22,125 and he's just as charming and handsome as lysander, maybe even more so. 309 00:17:22,208 --> 00:17:26,500 Not to mention, Demetrius will stop at nothing to make hermia his bride. 310 00:17:26,583 --> 00:17:29,125 This pretty much leaves lysander screwed. 311 00:17:31,291 --> 00:17:33,208 All right. Got it. 312 00:17:33,291 --> 00:17:37,834 You make it, very easy. 313 00:17:37,917 --> 00:17:39,375 We just started. 314 00:17:39,458 --> 00:17:42,041 Kelly, I'm not exactly trying to win an Oscar here. 315 00:17:42,125 --> 00:17:46,417 I'm just trying to get my girlfriend back. Thanks. 316 00:17:49,750 --> 00:17:51,667 Hi! How are you? 317 00:17:51,750 --> 00:17:54,542 Hi, new faces, how are you today? 318 00:17:54,625 --> 00:17:56,333 I'm Dr. Desmond forrest oates, 319 00:17:56,417 --> 00:18:00,208 fine arts chair and all that hoopla. 320 00:18:00,291 --> 00:18:01,875 The purpose of these proceedings 321 00:18:01,959 --> 00:18:05,083 is to separate the wheat from the chaff. 322 00:18:05,166 --> 00:18:10,291 And I think we might be amazed that among us is a new glimmering star, 323 00:18:10,375 --> 00:18:13,083 our school's next... 324 00:18:13,166 --> 00:18:16,041 Well, our next Peter wong. 325 00:18:16,125 --> 00:18:18,917 Hey, petey. 326 00:18:19,000 --> 00:18:20,166 Cool shirt. 327 00:18:21,792 --> 00:18:23,750 For those of you who don't make the cut, 328 00:18:23,834 --> 00:18:25,458 please, I beg of you, don't despair. 329 00:18:25,542 --> 00:18:27,000 There's always stage crew. 330 00:18:27,083 --> 00:18:29,583 And if you've ever had a conversation with a crew member, 331 00:18:29,667 --> 00:18:31,709 you know how much fun that can be. 332 00:18:31,792 --> 00:18:34,291 I'm kidding, I'm kidding. I couldn't resist it. 333 00:18:34,375 --> 00:18:36,542 You egg me on, is the problem. 334 00:18:36,625 --> 00:18:39,375 All right, the procedure is gonna be very, very, very basic. 335 00:18:39,458 --> 00:18:41,291 We're gonna start with the singing audition. 336 00:18:41,375 --> 00:18:45,208 Ok? So loosen up those diaphragms, kiddies. 337 00:18:45,291 --> 00:18:47,291 It's time to impress. 338 00:18:47,375 --> 00:18:51,291 ♪ Where the bee sucks there suck I ♪ 339 00:18:51,375 --> 00:18:53,959 ♪ in a cowslip's bell I lie ♪ 340 00:18:54,041 --> 00:18:56,959 ♪ there I couch when owls do cry ♪ 341 00:18:57,041 --> 00:18:59,667 ♪ on the bat's back I do fly ♪ 342 00:18:59,750 --> 00:19:05,291 ♪ after summer merrily-y-y-y-y ♪ 343 00:19:05,375 --> 00:19:08,500 ♪ take a look here I am ♪ 344 00:19:08,583 --> 00:19:11,750 ♪ can't you see? ♪ 345 00:19:11,834 --> 00:19:16,291 ♪ One simple smile from you could set me free ♪ 346 00:19:16,375 --> 00:19:19,750 ♪ so if you take a look ♪ 347 00:19:19,834 --> 00:19:24,250 ♪ let your heart be your guide ♪ 348 00:19:24,333 --> 00:19:26,125 ♪ I'll show you love ♪ 349 00:19:26,208 --> 00:19:28,208 ♪ if you take a look ♪ 350 00:19:28,291 --> 00:19:33,667 ♪ at the girl inside ♪ 351 00:19:33,750 --> 00:19:38,208 That was... that was fun. Who's the composer on that? 352 00:19:38,291 --> 00:19:40,875 Me, actually. 353 00:19:40,959 --> 00:19:44,667 I'm sorry, were you... were you expecting an applause on that? 354 00:19:44,750 --> 00:19:46,500 This is an audition, not t.R.L. 355 00:19:46,583 --> 00:19:49,542 I know that. 356 00:19:49,625 --> 00:19:52,834 Who's next? "Bentley scrumfeld." 357 00:19:52,917 --> 00:19:55,834 One of the original swing town lads, if I'm not mistaken. 358 00:19:55,917 --> 00:19:58,000 I see you know your boy groups, sir. 359 00:19:58,083 --> 00:20:00,125 I follow the popular arts. 360 00:20:01,417 --> 00:20:03,458 To me they're so dope. 361 00:20:03,542 --> 00:20:07,834 If you don't mind, I'd like to accompany myself. 362 00:20:07,917 --> 00:20:09,625 Put that down. 363 00:20:10,458 --> 00:20:12,417 Thank you. 364 00:20:12,500 --> 00:20:16,417 This one's kind of a personal favorite of mine. 365 00:20:16,500 --> 00:20:19,500 ♪ 366 00:20:21,667 --> 00:20:23,667 ♪ It's so funny ♪ 367 00:20:23,750 --> 00:20:28,208 ♪ to be seeing you after so long, girl ♪ 368 00:20:28,291 --> 00:20:31,333 ♪ and the way you look I understand ♪ 369 00:20:31,417 --> 00:20:34,500 ♪ that you are not impressed ♪ 370 00:20:34,583 --> 00:20:40,375 ♪ but I heard you let that little friend of mine ♪ 371 00:20:40,458 --> 00:20:43,583 ♪ take off your party dress ♪ 372 00:20:43,667 --> 00:20:45,375 My. 373 00:20:45,458 --> 00:20:50,583 ♪ Allison ♪ 374 00:20:50,667 --> 00:20:57,208 ♪ I know this world is killin' you ♪ 375 00:20:57,291 --> 00:21:01,875 ♪ Allison ♪ 376 00:21:03,667 --> 00:21:05,458 ♪ My aim is true ♪ he's the best one. 377 00:21:05,542 --> 00:21:07,500 He's the best one we've seen so far. 378 00:21:09,542 --> 00:21:12,750 ♪ My aim is ♪ 379 00:21:12,834 --> 00:21:14,417 True. 380 00:21:20,125 --> 00:21:21,333 Very nice, Mr. Striker. 381 00:21:21,417 --> 00:21:24,250 That is very impressive indeed. 382 00:21:24,333 --> 00:21:27,417 That's, that's... wow. 383 00:21:27,500 --> 00:21:29,100 Alrighty. Well, if there's no one else... 384 00:21:29,166 --> 00:21:30,959 Wait. What? 385 00:21:31,041 --> 00:21:34,959 May I help you? Berke landers. I'm here to audition. 386 00:21:35,041 --> 00:21:39,667 Berke landers. Goody for me. 387 00:21:39,750 --> 00:21:44,333 I'd like to read a monologue by oberon in the third act. 388 00:21:44,417 --> 00:21:48,750 I can't wait to hear it, but first I need to hear your singing audition. 389 00:21:48,834 --> 00:21:49,417 Excuse me? 390 00:21:49,500 --> 00:21:50,917 The procedure, Mr. Landers, 391 00:21:51,000 --> 00:21:54,083 is that we sing first and then we read later. 392 00:21:57,583 --> 00:21:58,643 Jessica, could you help me here? 393 00:21:58,667 --> 00:22:01,458 I-i-i-i-I'm sinking in quicksand, unfortunately, 394 00:22:01,542 --> 00:22:02,959 with this boy. 395 00:22:03,041 --> 00:22:05,500 Sing first, read later. Sing first, read later. 396 00:22:19,583 --> 00:22:23,041 Any song? Any song you want. 397 00:22:25,417 --> 00:22:29,333 ♪ Kiss a little longer make it last a little longer ♪ 398 00:22:29,417 --> 00:22:33,583 Projection, Mr. Berke, projection. 399 00:22:37,250 --> 00:22:38,959 ♪ Kiss a little longer ♪ 400 00:22:39,041 --> 00:22:41,333 ♪ stay close a little longer ♪ 401 00:22:48,583 --> 00:22:50,959 ♪ Hold tight a little longer ♪ 402 00:22:52,792 --> 00:22:55,417 ♪ longer with big red ♪ 403 00:22:57,625 --> 00:23:02,166 ♪ that big red freshness lasts right through it ♪ 404 00:23:02,250 --> 00:23:04,500 ♪ your fresh breath goes on and on ♪ 405 00:23:04,583 --> 00:23:06,166 ♪ while you chew it ♪ 406 00:23:06,250 --> 00:23:09,000 ♪ so say goodbye a little longer ♪ 407 00:23:09,083 --> 00:23:11,375 ♪ make it last a little longer ♪ 408 00:23:11,458 --> 00:23:15,542 ♪ give your breath long-lasting freshness ♪ 409 00:23:15,625 --> 00:23:17,583 ♪ with big red ♪ 410 00:23:27,000 --> 00:23:28,583 Yeah. What's going on? 411 00:23:28,667 --> 00:23:29,500 Nothing. 412 00:23:29,583 --> 00:23:31,208 I'm just sitting here watching Chester 413 00:23:31,291 --> 00:23:32,083 screw the rubber tree. 414 00:23:32,166 --> 00:23:34,083 What is that? Some kind of expression? 415 00:23:34,166 --> 00:23:37,667 No, no, no, no. My aunt's dog is staying with us for a couple of weeks. 416 00:23:37,750 --> 00:23:41,500 And, apparently, he's got some sort of hormonal imbalance. 417 00:23:43,041 --> 00:23:45,583 Wow... 418 00:23:45,667 --> 00:23:47,750 Is Kelly there? What? 419 00:23:47,834 --> 00:23:49,583 Kelly. Your sister. Is she there? 420 00:23:49,667 --> 00:23:52,250 Why? 'Cause she did a favor for me today. 421 00:23:52,333 --> 00:23:56,208 Just put her on, ok? Ok. 422 00:23:56,291 --> 00:23:57,333 Hold, please. 423 00:24:00,125 --> 00:24:04,041 Berke landers. Since when do my friends start calling you? 424 00:24:04,125 --> 00:24:06,417 Since today. Hey. 425 00:24:06,500 --> 00:24:07,792 So how was I? 426 00:24:09,125 --> 00:24:13,041 You were really... Ok. 427 00:24:13,125 --> 00:24:14,845 Sorry. I thought you knew about the singing. 428 00:24:14,875 --> 00:24:18,458 Minor detail. You were cute. 429 00:24:18,542 --> 00:24:21,000 You wanna tell Allison that? 430 00:24:21,083 --> 00:24:23,583 Well, I hope you get in the play. 431 00:24:23,667 --> 00:24:26,625 What? Felix? 432 00:24:26,709 --> 00:24:29,458 I can hear you breathing! 433 00:24:29,542 --> 00:24:31,834 Hello? 434 00:24:33,709 --> 00:24:36,083 All right, everyone, coming through! 435 00:24:36,166 --> 00:24:38,667 Out of my way! Part! 436 00:24:38,750 --> 00:24:41,250 Please! Excuse me. Thank you. 437 00:24:48,667 --> 00:24:50,166 Ok, ev... all right! 438 00:24:50,250 --> 00:24:53,083 Demetrius! Yes! 439 00:24:53,166 --> 00:24:55,458 Congratulations, fair hermia. You're kidding. 440 00:24:55,542 --> 00:24:57,500 I knew you'd get it. 441 00:24:57,583 --> 00:25:00,083 All right, people, this play is gonna rock! 442 00:25:03,750 --> 00:25:07,667 Chorus? You've got to be shitting me. 443 00:25:07,750 --> 00:25:10,041 Helena? My god! 444 00:25:11,041 --> 00:25:13,333 Good news? Sorry, I just... 445 00:25:13,417 --> 00:25:16,458 I really had my heart set on that part. 446 00:25:16,542 --> 00:25:17,792 That's... that's good. 447 00:25:19,083 --> 00:25:23,041 Look, there's you. Yeah. 448 00:25:23,125 --> 00:25:27,000 Well, let's hope attendant #3 doesn't have any songs. 449 00:25:27,083 --> 00:25:30,000 Felicitations, miss woods. Thank you so much. 450 00:25:30,083 --> 00:25:32,709 It's a lead role. I know. 451 00:25:32,792 --> 00:25:34,667 Methinks thou best not botch it. 452 00:25:36,000 --> 00:25:39,834 I remember what the wonderful Bobby de niro once said to me. 453 00:25:39,917 --> 00:25:42,667 Well, not to me, but I read it in an article. 454 00:25:42,750 --> 00:25:45,390 And it was considering landing the big roles, and what he said was, 455 00:25:45,458 --> 00:25:47,375 "just because god blesses you, 456 00:25:47,458 --> 00:25:51,458 does not mean there isn't another sneeze coming." 457 00:25:54,291 --> 00:25:57,500 Anyway, see you at Thursday's rehearsal. 458 00:25:57,583 --> 00:25:58,750 You, too. 459 00:26:00,458 --> 00:26:04,542 Dr. Forrest oates, that's... That's kinda gonna be a problem. 460 00:26:04,625 --> 00:26:08,125 See, next week we got all the, basketball playoffs. 461 00:26:11,125 --> 00:26:13,458 Now, let me tell you something, bub. 462 00:26:14,834 --> 00:26:17,083 This is your theatrical debut! 463 00:26:17,166 --> 00:26:19,166 I want you to take it seriously! 464 00:26:19,250 --> 00:26:23,667 I want you to give it half the dedication, just half 465 00:26:23,750 --> 00:26:25,041 that I gave my own. 466 00:26:26,834 --> 00:26:30,959 To be or not to be. That is the question. 467 00:26:36,792 --> 00:26:39,208 Those were the salad days. 468 00:26:40,667 --> 00:26:42,166 Although these are good. 469 00:26:44,834 --> 00:26:48,583 Thursday, none of this, jock head. 470 00:26:53,667 --> 00:26:55,959 Let's go! Jessica, what... Why are you, look... what... 471 00:26:56,041 --> 00:26:57,351 Come on, come on, come on, come on. 472 00:26:57,375 --> 00:26:59,583 Excuse me, I'm a teacher. Thanks. 473 00:27:01,834 --> 00:27:03,000 Let's go, let's go! 474 00:27:04,625 --> 00:27:06,291 Where are you goin', landers? 475 00:27:07,417 --> 00:27:08,792 Landers! 476 00:27:08,875 --> 00:27:11,959 So in summation, lysander loves hermia, 477 00:27:12,041 --> 00:27:14,667 who loves lysander, but is betrothed to Demetrius, 478 00:27:14,750 --> 00:27:17,750 who in turn is the object of Helena's affection. 479 00:27:17,834 --> 00:27:20,792 Now do you see the fun of it? 480 00:27:20,875 --> 00:27:23,000 It's just all hell done break loose. 481 00:27:23,083 --> 00:27:25,834 Mickey Rourke said a wonderful thing about having fun. 482 00:27:25,917 --> 00:27:29,083 He was at some big soiree that Liza minnelli was throwing... 483 00:27:31,083 --> 00:27:34,625 Mr. Landers, how nice of you to join us. 484 00:27:34,709 --> 00:27:38,792 And thanks for not showering. What a super instinct. 485 00:27:38,875 --> 00:27:40,834 The secret to all this, you see, 486 00:27:40,917 --> 00:27:43,834 is that our four young lovers 487 00:27:43,917 --> 00:27:47,625 are not as in control of their romantic destinies as they think 488 00:27:47,709 --> 00:27:51,166 because in the woods, we have what? 489 00:27:51,250 --> 00:27:53,333 Fairies. Fairies! Fairies! 490 00:27:53,417 --> 00:27:55,166 Spirits! Spirits. 491 00:27:57,250 --> 00:28:01,792 Specifically, titania, oberon and puck. 492 00:28:01,875 --> 00:28:04,000 Little Steve. Steven. 493 00:28:04,083 --> 00:28:07,917 Who delight in manipulating their human counterparts... 494 00:28:08,959 --> 00:28:10,333 For sport. 495 00:28:10,417 --> 00:28:14,458 It really is fun to see a bunch of fairies being played... 496 00:28:17,583 --> 00:28:19,709 Holy shit, little Steve, you've got wings! 497 00:28:19,792 --> 00:28:22,208 Yeah, well, you've got fairy dust coming out of your ass. 498 00:28:22,291 --> 00:28:23,768 Come on, guys. Let's stir up some trouble. 499 00:28:23,792 --> 00:28:28,792 Fair hermia, thou art so incredibly hot and stuff. 500 00:28:28,875 --> 00:28:33,083 Hey, red, follow us. You can't see us, but you'll do what we say. 501 00:28:33,166 --> 00:28:34,709 Suckers. 502 00:28:36,500 --> 00:28:38,834 Yo, dude, somebody's scammin' on your chick. 503 00:28:38,917 --> 00:28:39,917 Time to kick some ass. 504 00:28:41,959 --> 00:28:44,875 Demetrius, what say you? 505 00:28:44,959 --> 00:28:46,542 Relent, sweet hermia. 506 00:28:46,625 --> 00:28:47,875 And you, lysander, 507 00:28:47,959 --> 00:28:50,875 yield thy crazed title to my certain right. 508 00:28:50,959 --> 00:28:53,875 En garde. What? There's no sword fighting in this play. 509 00:28:53,959 --> 00:28:55,750 Well, now there is. 510 00:29:14,166 --> 00:29:16,583 Off you go. 511 00:29:29,000 --> 00:29:30,917 When it rains, it pours. 512 00:29:31,000 --> 00:29:33,250 Mr. Landers! 513 00:29:33,333 --> 00:29:35,709 Are we having r.E.M.? 514 00:29:42,834 --> 00:29:46,291 Musical Shakespeare? Calling my sister? 515 00:29:46,375 --> 00:29:49,792 She's helping me out. My sister? 516 00:29:49,875 --> 00:29:50,976 Yeah. She knows what she's doing. 517 00:29:51,000 --> 00:29:53,875 Whatever. Berke. This isn't about her, all right? 518 00:29:54,000 --> 00:29:56,834 This is about you running after Allison. 519 00:29:56,917 --> 00:29:59,041 And I'm sorry, but it's bullshit. 520 00:30:00,000 --> 00:30:01,667 See you out there. 521 00:30:03,208 --> 00:30:05,792 That's it. We gotta find our boy somebody, quick. 522 00:30:05,875 --> 00:30:08,583 You don't just arbitrarily replace someone's soul mate. 523 00:30:08,667 --> 00:30:10,959 I mean, look at that old lady from Titanic. 524 00:30:11,041 --> 00:30:12,291 She didn't never get over that. 525 00:30:12,375 --> 00:30:15,417 I'm not just talking about anybody. 526 00:30:15,500 --> 00:30:17,750 Look, you still take shop with dora Lynn tissdale, right? 527 00:30:17,834 --> 00:30:22,750 Yeah. Um, last week, she nearly took out half the class with a nail gun. 528 00:30:22,834 --> 00:30:24,792 So she's a bit clumsy. 529 00:30:24,875 --> 00:30:26,417 Thanks to good old dora Lynn, 530 00:30:26,500 --> 00:30:29,625 Dickie bergwell has to take a crap standing up. 531 00:30:29,709 --> 00:30:32,125 Dennis, we're not asking her 532 00:30:32,208 --> 00:30:34,959 to build an apartment complex, are we? 533 00:30:35,041 --> 00:30:36,601 And what makes you think she's gonna do it? 534 00:30:36,625 --> 00:30:38,875 Look, that's your problem, all right? 535 00:30:38,959 --> 00:30:40,667 I'll take care of berke. 536 00:30:40,750 --> 00:30:45,375 Dennis heard it firsthand. The girl's completely into you. 537 00:30:45,458 --> 00:30:48,458 No, that's... that's bullshit. Why would I make this up? 538 00:30:48,542 --> 00:30:52,000 I mean, I'm presenting you here with a golden opportunity, 539 00:30:52,083 --> 00:30:55,041 the Stanley cup of blind dates, 540 00:30:55,125 --> 00:30:56,709 New Zealand's gift to rosner high. 541 00:30:56,792 --> 00:30:59,125 I mean, those eyes, that mouth, the rack. 542 00:30:59,208 --> 00:31:01,041 Aren't you forgetting something? 543 00:31:01,125 --> 00:31:04,709 Ok, yeah, she's a little accident-prone. 544 00:31:04,792 --> 00:31:07,625 The girl's a walking disaster zone. 545 00:31:07,709 --> 00:31:09,959 Wherever she goes, bad shit happens. 546 00:31:10,041 --> 00:31:11,083 My god! 547 00:31:11,166 --> 00:31:14,542 I mean, weird bad shit happens. 548 00:31:18,667 --> 00:31:22,041 She missed six years at the high school. 549 00:31:22,125 --> 00:31:25,041 She was in a coma for Christ's sakes. 550 00:31:25,125 --> 00:31:27,250 Berke, she's beautiful. Yeah. 551 00:31:27,333 --> 00:31:29,000 She's built. Yeah. 552 00:31:29,083 --> 00:31:31,309 And apparently, she's totally willing to lower her standards, 553 00:31:31,333 --> 00:31:34,000 so I really don't see anything wrong with this. 554 00:31:37,458 --> 00:31:40,250 It's your turn to get the ball. 555 00:31:40,333 --> 00:31:42,917 I'm not getting the ball. You get the ball. 556 00:31:47,792 --> 00:31:50,959 Hey, dora Lynn? Dora. 557 00:31:53,458 --> 00:31:54,935 Kinda got this favor to a... ask you. 558 00:31:54,959 --> 00:31:57,709 Favor? What kind of favor? 559 00:31:57,792 --> 00:32:00,166 Just stop, drop, and roll! 560 00:32:02,166 --> 00:32:04,959 Berke, don't be nervous. 561 00:32:05,041 --> 00:32:08,583 I'm here because I want to be. Me, too. 562 00:32:08,667 --> 00:32:10,917 We never really had a chance to talk. 563 00:32:11,000 --> 00:32:14,917 Well, I think that had a lot to do with the fact that I was busy with Allison 564 00:32:15,000 --> 00:32:18,875 and you kinda had your hands full with the whole... 565 00:32:18,959 --> 00:32:20,750 Coma thing? Yeah. 566 00:32:20,834 --> 00:32:22,792 Yeah. Yeah. 567 00:32:22,875 --> 00:32:25,041 You know, berke, 568 00:32:25,125 --> 00:32:27,291 it's all about new beginnings. 569 00:32:27,375 --> 00:32:30,917 That stuff about me being bad luck? Ancient history. 570 00:32:31,000 --> 00:32:35,542 I'm moving on with my life, and you're moving on with yours. 571 00:32:37,000 --> 00:32:39,083 Sorry. 572 00:32:39,166 --> 00:32:42,000 Would you excuse me for one minute? 573 00:32:42,875 --> 00:32:44,500 I kinda have to... 574 00:32:44,583 --> 00:32:46,417 Pee? Yeah. 575 00:32:46,500 --> 00:32:48,667 Ok. Ok. 576 00:32:48,750 --> 00:32:51,917 [ Japanese instrumentation ] 577 00:32:54,208 --> 00:32:56,917 Waitress, can I have some more tea? 578 00:32:57,000 --> 00:32:58,083 I love...! 579 00:33:00,750 --> 00:33:03,125 Tits! Wow! 580 00:33:23,959 --> 00:33:25,583 Check, please! 581 00:33:27,625 --> 00:33:31,166 ♪ I'm dreaming of a boy a very special guy ♪ 582 00:33:31,250 --> 00:33:35,375 ♪ I wish that I could pluck a fairy from the sky ♪ 583 00:33:35,458 --> 00:33:39,333 ♪ to cast a spell upon my pride and joy ♪ 584 00:33:39,417 --> 00:33:41,792 ♪ I'm dreaming of a very special boy ♪ 585 00:33:41,875 --> 00:33:43,208 Time. Time. 586 00:33:43,291 --> 00:33:46,166 It's just not very good. 587 00:33:46,250 --> 00:33:49,000 I could lie to you, but I would do you a disservice 588 00:33:49,083 --> 00:33:51,834 because it's... it's just bad. You've got to commit. 589 00:33:51,917 --> 00:33:56,667 ♪ I'm dreaming of a boy a very special guy ♪ 590 00:33:56,750 --> 00:34:00,333 And then, "I wish that I could pluck, pluck! I wanna see you pluck it! 591 00:34:00,417 --> 00:34:02,834 You know what I mean? We'll talk about it later. 592 00:34:02,917 --> 00:34:04,875 Ok, enter theseus. 593 00:34:04,959 --> 00:34:09,250 Now, attendants, a rogue suitor... 594 00:34:09,333 --> 00:34:12,208 Is spooning with the master's daughter. 595 00:34:12,291 --> 00:34:14,208 Well, this is totally scandalous. 596 00:34:14,291 --> 00:34:17,208 So you must look shocked, you must look amazed. 597 00:34:17,291 --> 00:34:18,625 Let's see you look shocked. 598 00:34:20,333 --> 00:34:23,041 I said shocked, Mr. Landers, not constipated. 599 00:34:24,917 --> 00:34:27,500 My dear god. Go, del. 600 00:34:29,291 --> 00:34:32,375 Go bid the huntsmen. Wake them with their horns. 601 00:34:32,458 --> 00:34:35,083 Hold it. Yes, um... 602 00:34:35,166 --> 00:34:36,166 Um, well, can i... 603 00:34:36,250 --> 00:34:38,208 You'd tell me if you'd had a stroke. 604 00:34:40,166 --> 00:34:44,250 And eight. One, two, three, four... 605 00:34:44,333 --> 00:34:47,250 What? What? 606 00:34:47,333 --> 00:34:49,417 Are you lost? 607 00:34:49,500 --> 00:34:53,458 Um, no. Actually, i... I signed up for stage crew, and i... 608 00:34:53,542 --> 00:34:56,875 Stage crew? Then shouldn't you be over there? 609 00:35:02,709 --> 00:35:03,875 Right. 610 00:35:06,166 --> 00:35:09,583 My lord, I shall reply amazedly. 611 00:35:09,667 --> 00:35:12,583 Half sleep, half waken, I came with hermia hither. 612 00:35:12,667 --> 00:35:16,083 Our intent was to be gone from Athens, 613 00:35:16,166 --> 00:35:20,917 where we might, without the peril of athenian law, 614 00:35:21,000 --> 00:35:22,417 be wed. 615 00:35:22,500 --> 00:35:26,250 Save it for show night, wong. 616 00:35:26,333 --> 00:35:27,583 Sorry, striker. 617 00:35:39,041 --> 00:35:42,667 ♪ What do you get when you fall in love? ♪ 618 00:35:42,750 --> 00:35:46,458 ♪ A girl with a pin to burst your bubble ♪ 619 00:35:46,542 --> 00:35:50,291 ♪ that's what you get for all your trouble ♪ 620 00:35:50,375 --> 00:35:52,125 ♪ I'll ♪ 621 00:35:52,208 --> 00:35:56,834 ♪ never fall in love again ♪ 622 00:35:58,208 --> 00:36:00,458 ♪ I'll never fall in love ♪ 623 00:36:00,542 --> 00:36:04,125 ♪ what do you get when you kiss a girl? ♪ 624 00:36:04,208 --> 00:36:06,291 ♪ You know what? 625 00:36:06,375 --> 00:36:08,333 I'd ask you what the hell you're even doing here, 626 00:36:08,417 --> 00:36:11,792 but if some stranger had dazzled his way into my ex-girlfriend's fancies, 627 00:36:11,875 --> 00:36:14,542 I'd probably be doing the same thing, 628 00:36:14,625 --> 00:36:16,875 only I'd have a bigger part. 629 00:36:17,959 --> 00:36:19,166 You dropped your sword. 630 00:36:19,250 --> 00:36:22,875 ♪ I'll never fall in love again ♪ 631 00:36:24,417 --> 00:36:27,375 ♪ don't tell me what it's all ♪ 632 00:36:27,458 --> 00:36:29,208 ♪ about ♪ 633 00:36:29,291 --> 00:36:33,208 ♪ 'cause I've been there and I'm glad I'm out ♪ 634 00:36:33,291 --> 00:36:36,709 ♪ out of those chains those chains that bind you ♪ I am so sorry. Big... big game. 635 00:36:36,792 --> 00:36:40,792 ♪ And that is what I'm here to remind you ♪ 636 00:36:42,250 --> 00:36:45,667 Substitution. Sorry, sir. There was a big accident. 637 00:36:45,750 --> 00:36:48,041 You are so lucky I am not Bobby knight. 638 00:36:48,125 --> 00:36:50,559 And we got playoffs next week and you've got an obligation to the team. 639 00:36:50,583 --> 00:36:52,834 Now get out there! Yes, sir! 640 00:36:52,917 --> 00:36:56,208 Substitution for rosner, berke landers. 641 00:37:00,333 --> 00:37:03,417 Hey, landers, nice ass! 642 00:37:06,125 --> 00:37:07,250 I'm gonna go now. 643 00:37:07,333 --> 00:37:10,000 ♪ Never fall in love again ♪ 644 00:37:12,583 --> 00:37:15,166 Yeah, I'll see you guys later. Have a good night. 645 00:37:28,500 --> 00:37:30,542 Don't stop because of me. 646 00:37:30,625 --> 00:37:34,667 Sorry. I... I just never get to play a real piano at home. 647 00:37:37,375 --> 00:37:40,625 So you've been a busy guy lately. 648 00:37:40,709 --> 00:37:43,875 Yeah, dating a pyromaniac, showing my ass in public. 649 00:37:43,959 --> 00:37:46,709 Well, it's all in the name of love, right? 650 00:37:48,208 --> 00:37:49,375 Right. 651 00:37:53,333 --> 00:37:55,291 Play me something. 652 00:37:56,709 --> 00:37:59,375 No. Come on. It sounded good. 653 00:37:59,458 --> 00:38:00,792 I'm embarrassed. 654 00:38:02,959 --> 00:38:06,250 I love writing songs, but it... 655 00:38:06,333 --> 00:38:07,417 What's the problem? 656 00:38:07,500 --> 00:38:10,250 Well, you were at the audition, berke. 657 00:38:10,333 --> 00:38:12,208 Forrest oates hated my song. 658 00:38:12,875 --> 00:38:14,625 Well, 659 00:38:14,709 --> 00:38:18,083 I admired you for putting yourself out there like that, 660 00:38:18,166 --> 00:38:21,458 and, you know, for whatever it's worth, 661 00:38:21,542 --> 00:38:24,583 i... i... I thought it was a really nice song. 662 00:38:27,166 --> 00:38:28,333 Thanks. 663 00:38:32,375 --> 00:38:34,542 This is a song I wrote. 664 00:38:35,709 --> 00:38:37,083 ♪ ♪ b, c ♪ 665 00:38:37,166 --> 00:38:39,959 ♪ d, e, f, g ♪ god! 666 00:38:41,875 --> 00:38:43,792 Bring it on. 667 00:38:43,875 --> 00:38:48,333 ♪ H, I, j, k, l, m, n, o, p ♪ 668 00:38:56,917 --> 00:38:58,041 Showoff. 669 00:39:24,750 --> 00:39:26,500 Berke. Yeah. Hey, Felix. 670 00:39:26,583 --> 00:39:29,458 How do you feel about half-naked women? 671 00:39:29,542 --> 00:39:32,166 Would you mind telling me where we're going? 672 00:39:32,250 --> 00:39:35,041 Suffice to say, Dennis and I, we discussed it 673 00:39:35,125 --> 00:39:37,000 and decided that this is exactly what you need. 674 00:39:37,083 --> 00:39:41,333 It looks like we have a very special guest with us tonight, 675 00:39:41,417 --> 00:39:46,625 a young man recently jilted by his longtime lady love. 676 00:39:48,458 --> 00:39:50,792 Hey, see you later, Casanova. 677 00:40:02,000 --> 00:40:03,875 Yeah. What's that? 678 00:40:03,959 --> 00:40:06,375 It's Monday madness, people. 679 00:40:06,458 --> 00:40:08,834 You know what that means. 680 00:40:18,458 --> 00:40:22,041 Behold my majestic, corseted form! 681 00:40:22,125 --> 00:40:26,625 Police! I want to see some ids, and I want to see them quick! 682 00:40:26,709 --> 00:40:28,041 My god! Sorry! 683 00:40:39,834 --> 00:40:43,333 Hey, can somebody get me down? Please? 684 00:40:44,667 --> 00:40:47,208 Jesus, mother of god! 685 00:40:48,875 --> 00:40:50,917 I must say, you surprised us, berke. 686 00:40:51,000 --> 00:40:53,101 It's not every day you get a wake-up call from the cops 687 00:40:53,125 --> 00:40:55,959 saying your son's been pinched in a sex club raid. 688 00:40:56,041 --> 00:40:59,125 That said, your father and I have discussed it... 689 00:40:59,208 --> 00:41:03,792 And we'd just like to say... we are so incredibly proud of you. 690 00:41:03,875 --> 00:41:04,542 What? 691 00:41:04,625 --> 00:41:06,834 For getting on with your life. 692 00:41:06,917 --> 00:41:10,500 Most kids your age are way ill-equipped to deal with heartache. 693 00:41:10,583 --> 00:41:13,458 But not you, mister. You got right back on that horse. 694 00:41:13,542 --> 00:41:15,834 Or should I say, suspension harness? Stop it. 695 00:41:15,917 --> 00:41:19,667 Mom, dad, I just got arrested. Shouldn't you be, like, pissed or something? 696 00:41:19,750 --> 00:41:23,458 Why? Sexual curiosity is perfectly natural. 697 00:41:23,542 --> 00:41:25,667 We just had no idea you were so kinky. Yeah. 698 00:41:25,750 --> 00:41:27,625 Hey, who's up for frozen yogurt? 699 00:41:27,709 --> 00:41:29,625 Ooh, sounds good to me. 700 00:41:29,709 --> 00:41:34,500 Well, then again, berke may want to go home and Polish the rocket. 701 00:41:34,583 --> 00:41:37,625 Yogurt's good. 702 00:41:38,917 --> 00:41:40,041 Ok. 703 00:41:42,208 --> 00:41:43,375 Ok, Dennis. 704 00:41:43,959 --> 00:41:46,125 What? Bring her up. 705 00:41:52,750 --> 00:41:54,667 Ladies and gentlemen, 706 00:41:54,750 --> 00:41:57,875 introducing prisoner number 6943. 707 00:41:57,959 --> 00:42:00,625 Bravo, landers, bravo. 708 00:42:00,709 --> 00:42:03,458 You know, you do take a stunning picture. 709 00:42:03,542 --> 00:42:06,333 Striker, I'd be careful about that accent 710 00:42:06,417 --> 00:42:09,375 because you're beginning to sound a lot like Mary poppins. 711 00:42:09,458 --> 00:42:12,291 Look, I don't know what you're blathering about, but if I were you... 712 00:42:12,375 --> 00:42:13,959 Hold it, hold it, hold it. 713 00:42:15,583 --> 00:42:17,458 What? Are you wearing makeup? 714 00:42:20,542 --> 00:42:22,166 That's it. 715 00:42:23,750 --> 00:42:25,750 Ooh. 716 00:42:25,834 --> 00:42:29,917 Careful, landers. I do believe you are trifling with danger. 717 00:42:30,000 --> 00:42:32,750 Who keeps nunchucks in their pants? 718 00:42:37,458 --> 00:42:39,458 Peter wong is down! 719 00:42:41,917 --> 00:42:43,709 Look on the bright side, wong. 720 00:42:43,792 --> 00:42:45,667 You're a singer, not a dancer. 721 00:42:45,750 --> 00:42:49,875 I'll kill you, you ant-kissing, pretentious, swing town twit! 722 00:42:49,959 --> 00:42:54,166 This is my theater! My show! 723 00:42:54,250 --> 00:42:57,166 Forrest oates is my special buddy! 724 00:42:57,250 --> 00:42:59,041 That was intense. 725 00:42:59,125 --> 00:43:03,083 I know. I've never seen bone poke through skin like that before. 726 00:43:03,166 --> 00:43:07,750 All right then, everything's going to be fine, according to the paramedics. 727 00:43:07,834 --> 00:43:10,792 In fact, Peter will be back on his feet in no time. 728 00:43:14,667 --> 00:43:17,542 Still, in the words of the wonderful Kevin spacey, 729 00:43:17,625 --> 00:43:19,291 the show must go on. 730 00:43:19,375 --> 00:43:21,792 So since curtain is, indeed, in three days, 731 00:43:21,875 --> 00:43:26,375 I'm now accepting offers from volunteers for the role of lysander. 732 00:43:26,458 --> 00:43:27,166 Ooh! Ooh! 733 00:43:27,250 --> 00:43:28,792 Put your hand down, little Steve! 734 00:43:28,875 --> 00:43:30,417 Ooh. 735 00:43:30,500 --> 00:43:32,208 No, not striker, you already have a role. 736 00:43:32,291 --> 00:43:36,792 Yes, I know, but I was wanting to nominate someone. 737 00:43:36,875 --> 00:43:41,375 Well, that's very flattering, indeed, 738 00:43:41,458 --> 00:43:46,125 but I don't think a man of 34 can possibly keep up with you youngsters. 739 00:43:46,208 --> 00:43:48,792 Actually, I was referring to... 740 00:43:48,875 --> 00:43:50,834 Berke landers. 741 00:43:52,417 --> 00:43:53,792 Well, th... 742 00:43:53,875 --> 00:43:56,792 That's an intriguing thought. 743 00:43:56,875 --> 00:43:57,959 Any other ideas? 744 00:43:58,041 --> 00:43:59,333 Ooh! One that I might use? 745 00:43:59,417 --> 00:44:00,959 Put your hand down, little Steve! 746 00:44:01,041 --> 00:44:03,625 Well, he's green, to be sure, but he does demonstrate 747 00:44:03,709 --> 00:44:06,083 a certain... enthusiasm. 748 00:44:07,667 --> 00:44:10,125 I'm in. 749 00:44:10,208 --> 00:44:12,417 You're in? Yeah, I'm in. 750 00:44:14,041 --> 00:44:16,625 Jessica, call domino's. We'll be here a while. 751 00:44:16,709 --> 00:44:19,625 And keep icing your front bum! 752 00:44:19,709 --> 00:44:23,083 Swelling continues when you don't ice, and I need you. 753 00:44:24,208 --> 00:44:26,667 Not really. 754 00:44:26,750 --> 00:44:28,166 So how many swords do we have? 755 00:44:28,250 --> 00:44:31,500 Seven. Eight. 756 00:44:31,583 --> 00:44:35,291 I swear, if Allison doesn't appreciate this... then what? 757 00:44:37,375 --> 00:44:39,875 Anyway, I've heard you do the dialogue. You're fine. 758 00:44:39,959 --> 00:44:43,542 Yeah, but what about the singing? Well, the music sucks. 759 00:44:43,625 --> 00:44:44,625 Especially my song. 760 00:44:44,667 --> 00:44:47,166 Well, why don't you, why don't you rewrite it? 761 00:44:47,250 --> 00:44:49,834 Forrest oates would never go for it. 762 00:44:49,917 --> 00:44:54,000 Kelly, you're the best one in the play. You know more about this stuff than he does. 763 00:44:54,083 --> 00:44:57,458 Yeah, but he doesn't see it that way. 764 00:44:57,542 --> 00:44:59,834 Forrest oates just cast me as a lead. 765 00:44:59,917 --> 00:45:02,083 He's an idiot, Allison. 766 00:45:04,792 --> 00:45:06,834 My name... 767 00:45:06,917 --> 00:45:08,834 Is Kelly. 768 00:45:08,917 --> 00:45:10,875 What'd I say? Allison. 769 00:45:10,959 --> 00:45:12,709 No, I didn't. Yeah, you did. 770 00:45:12,792 --> 00:45:14,917 I'm sorry. Prepare to die. 771 00:45:15,000 --> 00:45:18,041 Maybe y... you shouldn't be playing with that. 772 00:45:18,125 --> 00:45:20,166 Put... com... put it down. 773 00:45:20,917 --> 00:45:23,291 Put it... k... Kelly. 774 00:45:26,917 --> 00:45:28,041 Aaaah! 775 00:45:28,125 --> 00:45:29,417 We have an 18-year-old white male 776 00:45:29,500 --> 00:45:31,709 with an anterior puncture wound to his left arm. 777 00:45:31,792 --> 00:45:35,417 My god, I'm so sorry, berke. I thought it was a prop. I wanna see it. 778 00:45:35,500 --> 00:45:38,166 No, don't look at it. It's pretty bad, isn't it? 779 00:45:38,250 --> 00:45:41,875 No, it's... it's fine. Here, listen to me, berke. 780 00:45:41,959 --> 00:45:44,267 The doctor's gonna fix your arm and I'm gonna help you rehearse 781 00:45:44,291 --> 00:45:46,875 and you're gonna be the best lysander ever, ok? 782 00:45:46,959 --> 00:45:49,875 And your arm, it's really not that... my god! 783 00:45:55,000 --> 00:45:57,250 ♪ Bah-bah bah-de-dah dah-bah-bah ♪ 784 00:45:57,333 --> 00:45:59,917 ♪ bah-bah bah-de-dah dah-bah-bah ♪ 785 00:46:00,000 --> 00:46:03,500 ♪ bah-bah bah-de-dah dah-bah-bah dah-de-dah ♪ 786 00:46:05,000 --> 00:46:07,417 ♪ bah-bah bah-de-dah dah-bah-bah ♪ 787 00:46:07,500 --> 00:46:09,750 ♪ bah-bah bah-de-dah dah-bah-bah ♪ 788 00:46:09,834 --> 00:46:12,291 ♪ bah-bah bah-de-dah dah-bah-bah dah-de-dah ♪ 789 00:46:12,375 --> 00:46:17,291 ♪ I'm just saying that Thursday night you've kept Kelly's ass out till 12:15. 790 00:46:17,375 --> 00:46:20,083 Felix, it's Kelly. All right? 791 00:46:20,166 --> 00:46:22,583 She's helping me out with the part. Ok, ok, ok. 792 00:46:22,667 --> 00:46:23,959 Just keep an eye on her, man. 793 00:46:24,041 --> 00:46:25,518 You know, 'cause some of those theater guys 794 00:46:25,542 --> 00:46:28,041 they have this reputation of being kinda... 795 00:46:28,125 --> 00:46:30,875 Gay? See, that's what they want you to think. 796 00:46:30,959 --> 00:46:31,976 I'll keep an eye on her. 797 00:46:35,875 --> 00:46:40,125 ♪ Bah-bah bah-de-dah dah-bah-bah dah-de-dah ♪ 798 00:46:40,208 --> 00:46:43,625 ♪ forty-eight hours I'm still havin' it bad ♪ 799 00:46:43,709 --> 00:46:45,959 ♪ thirty-two to go I was virtually dead ♪ 800 00:46:46,041 --> 00:46:47,959 ♪ makin' a mess on someone's desk ♪ 801 00:46:48,041 --> 00:46:51,291 ♪ I did it again bah-dah-dah-dah dah-dah ♪ 802 00:46:51,375 --> 00:46:54,125 ♪ started lookin' for someone the kind is you ♪ 803 00:46:54,208 --> 00:46:56,226 ♪ all the other places were there are nothin' to do ♪ 804 00:46:56,250 --> 00:46:58,959 ♪ so waste the morning and hang in bed nobody cares ♪ 805 00:46:59,041 --> 00:47:02,959 So when do your parents leave for this affiliate stuff? Today. 806 00:47:03,041 --> 00:47:05,291 Don't even think about it. What? 807 00:47:05,375 --> 00:47:08,500 Felix, I can hear your brain planning a party. No. 808 00:47:08,583 --> 00:47:12,166 I'll... I'll see you guys la... I gotta get something. 809 00:47:12,250 --> 00:47:14,583 Hey, why is he going into the music store? I don't know. 810 00:47:14,667 --> 00:47:17,208 He's probably buying tap shoes or some shit like that, 811 00:47:17,291 --> 00:47:20,333 which only further demonstrates my point, my friend. 812 00:47:20,417 --> 00:47:24,667 That man is in dire need of a party. 813 00:47:24,750 --> 00:47:26,375 Yes? 814 00:47:26,458 --> 00:47:29,875 Hi. I know you're busy, but I just wanna talk to you for one second. 815 00:47:29,959 --> 00:47:33,125 Miss woods, please come in... 816 00:47:33,208 --> 00:47:37,000 Fun hair clip. 817 00:47:37,083 --> 00:47:39,041 I wanted to talk to you about my song. 818 00:47:39,125 --> 00:47:40,667 "pocketful of dreams." 819 00:47:40,750 --> 00:47:44,542 I originally wrote that tune for miss Diana Ross. 820 00:47:46,291 --> 00:47:47,518 Miss Ross! Miss Ross! 821 00:47:47,542 --> 00:47:49,000 I've written a very groovy song! 822 00:47:49,083 --> 00:47:50,625 I think you'd li...! 823 00:47:50,709 --> 00:47:54,000 That's my hand, buddy! Aah! Miss Ross! 824 00:47:54,083 --> 00:47:58,083 Miss Ross! Diana! 825 00:47:58,166 --> 00:48:01,041 Unfortunately, the lawyers got involved, 826 00:48:01,125 --> 00:48:04,250 and then bullshit, bullshit, bullshit, bullshit. 827 00:48:04,333 --> 00:48:09,000 And then, the next thing you know... phtt! No deal. 828 00:48:09,083 --> 00:48:13,041 It's a great song. I love singing it. It was fun to write. 829 00:48:13,125 --> 00:48:17,041 It's just that I was wondering if you... if you wouldn't mind... 830 00:48:17,125 --> 00:48:19,166 If I made a few suggestions. 831 00:48:19,250 --> 00:48:21,792 You've made s... some suggestions? 832 00:48:22,959 --> 00:48:24,083 "O weary night, 833 00:48:24,166 --> 00:48:26,250 abate thy hours." 834 00:48:26,333 --> 00:48:31,875 Well, i... I just figured, you know, like you said, the song really isn't working. 835 00:48:33,667 --> 00:48:36,750 I'd like you to do me a favor, if you will, miss woods. 836 00:48:36,834 --> 00:48:40,291 I'd like you to read this poster and tell me what it says at the bottom. 837 00:48:40,375 --> 00:48:43,125 "No food or drink allowed in the auditorium at any time." 838 00:48:43,208 --> 00:48:46,083 It says, "12 original songs 839 00:48:46,166 --> 00:48:48,250 by Dr. Desmond forrest oates." 840 00:48:48,333 --> 00:48:52,750 That part. Yes, that part. 841 00:48:52,834 --> 00:48:54,142 I'll tell you what it doesn't say. 842 00:48:54,166 --> 00:48:55,351 It doesn't say, "additional lyrics 843 00:48:55,375 --> 00:48:58,083 by little miss sassy-pants." 844 00:48:58,166 --> 00:48:59,976 You know, some of those lyrics are Shakespeare's. 845 00:49:00,000 --> 00:49:04,542 And what was the last tune you hummed from Macbeth? 846 00:49:04,625 --> 00:49:07,458 Bill Shakespeare is a wonderful poet, 847 00:49:07,542 --> 00:49:10,500 but Burt Bacharach, he ain't. 848 00:49:11,166 --> 00:49:12,750 I'll go. 849 00:49:12,834 --> 00:49:14,709 Sorry I'm late. That's... that's ok. 850 00:49:14,792 --> 00:49:16,959 I was just getting lucky. Chester! 851 00:49:17,041 --> 00:49:20,083 We need... we need... we need... We need to find this dog a date. 852 00:49:20,166 --> 00:49:24,500 So, how was... how was forrest oates? 853 00:49:24,583 --> 00:49:27,125 A bigger asshole than I thought. 854 00:49:27,208 --> 00:49:31,792 Maybe this will make you feel a little better. A gift? Berke. 855 00:49:31,875 --> 00:49:35,125 First we rehearse, ok? 856 00:49:35,208 --> 00:49:36,750 Ok. All right. 857 00:49:40,583 --> 00:49:46,125 ♪ So that's the girl that I've got to have ♪ 858 00:49:46,208 --> 00:49:48,917 ♪ I'll tell you why... ♪ 859 00:49:51,041 --> 00:49:53,500 It's 21 hours until the play, 860 00:49:53,583 --> 00:49:55,750 and I'm actually starting to suck more. 861 00:49:55,834 --> 00:49:59,333 Look, let's just put the songs aside for a second. 862 00:49:59,417 --> 00:50:01,166 We'll work on some dialogue. 863 00:50:01,250 --> 00:50:05,500 We're at the point where theseus has just woken everybody up. 864 00:50:05,583 --> 00:50:06,875 All right. 865 00:50:12,625 --> 00:50:13,625 Hi. Hi. 866 00:50:18,458 --> 00:50:22,166 Ok, this scene's between you and hermia. 867 00:50:22,250 --> 00:50:25,333 So pretend I'm Allison, ok? Sure. 868 00:50:25,417 --> 00:50:28,166 As difficult as that might be. 869 00:50:28,250 --> 00:50:29,917 No, go ahead. 870 00:50:32,125 --> 00:50:35,625 So theseus says, 871 00:50:35,709 --> 00:50:38,834 "go, wake them with their horns." 872 00:50:38,917 --> 00:50:41,166 And hermia says, 873 00:50:41,250 --> 00:50:45,250 "methinks I see things with parted eye, 874 00:50:45,333 --> 00:50:47,458 when everything seems double." 875 00:50:50,625 --> 00:50:51,625 Ok, I got it. 876 00:50:51,667 --> 00:50:58,041 My lord, I reply amazedly, 877 00:50:58,125 --> 00:51:01,125 half asleep, half awake. 878 00:51:02,458 --> 00:51:05,041 I came with hermia hither. 879 00:51:07,458 --> 00:51:12,875 Our intent is to leave Athens... 880 00:51:12,959 --> 00:51:14,917 Where we may be married. 881 00:51:16,250 --> 00:51:19,208 And then there's the kiss... 882 00:51:19,291 --> 00:51:21,417 Which is gonna be with Allison. 883 00:51:21,500 --> 00:51:22,667 Right. 884 00:51:24,792 --> 00:51:26,917 But in this case... 885 00:51:34,500 --> 00:51:36,625 Shit. 886 00:51:36,709 --> 00:51:38,625 What? Hey, let me take a shot in the dark. 887 00:51:38,709 --> 00:51:41,917 Berke's there, right? Felix, where are you? 888 00:51:42,000 --> 00:51:43,750 Big party. Hey, listen. 889 00:51:43,834 --> 00:51:46,291 Tell, tell berke he might wanna stop by 890 00:51:46,375 --> 00:51:49,417 because there's some, people who've been asking about him. 891 00:51:49,500 --> 00:51:50,540 We gotta go to your house. 892 00:51:52,333 --> 00:51:54,625 Well, well. I'm impressed. 893 00:51:54,709 --> 00:51:57,417 Turnout's not half-bad. Where's Felix? 894 00:51:57,500 --> 00:51:59,875 Dude, you should really breathe, man. 895 00:51:59,959 --> 00:52:01,792 I mean, you look like you're gonna stroke out. 896 00:52:01,875 --> 00:52:04,083 Look, I'm gonna look for him over here, ok? 897 00:52:04,166 --> 00:52:07,041 You realize I'm going to kill him. 898 00:52:07,125 --> 00:52:08,208 Felix! 899 00:52:10,542 --> 00:52:13,125 Felix! If it isn't my beauteous costar. 900 00:52:13,208 --> 00:52:15,834 Have you seen my brother Felix? Fair Helena. 901 00:52:15,917 --> 00:52:20,291 So tense. A few pre-show jitters, perhaps? 902 00:52:20,375 --> 00:52:24,917 Or maybe some love pangs for a certain you-know-who. 903 00:52:25,000 --> 00:52:26,959 You! Berke! What's up? 904 00:52:27,041 --> 00:52:30,125 So what do you think? What do I think? What do I think? 905 00:52:30,208 --> 00:52:31,333 What are you talking about? 906 00:52:31,417 --> 00:52:32,559 Frankly, I don't know what you girls see 907 00:52:32,583 --> 00:52:34,750 in this undereducated wank. 908 00:52:34,834 --> 00:52:39,625 Perhaps you can take me out to the veranda and... 909 00:52:39,709 --> 00:52:40,458 Edify me. 910 00:52:40,542 --> 00:52:42,583 Shit, it's striker. 911 00:52:42,667 --> 00:52:46,125 Look, I'll see you at the show. What the hell is going on? 912 00:52:46,208 --> 00:52:48,750 Nothing. Just a bit of tomfoolery. 913 00:52:48,834 --> 00:52:52,500 Felix, I'm handling it. No, you're being handled by leather pants here. 914 00:52:52,583 --> 00:52:54,875 There's a difference. I think you better go. 915 00:52:54,959 --> 00:52:57,319 Come on. Do you really think I'd fool around on Allison? 916 00:52:57,375 --> 00:53:00,333 You, of all people, should know how damnable that would be. 917 00:53:00,417 --> 00:53:02,125 Now, where's the grub? This way? Thank you. 918 00:53:11,917 --> 00:53:14,333 Guys. 919 00:53:14,417 --> 00:53:17,375 Is it just me or does this punch taste kind of funky? 920 00:53:17,458 --> 00:53:19,417 There's chunks. 921 00:53:23,458 --> 00:53:25,500 Hi. 922 00:53:25,583 --> 00:53:28,166 I... i... -I've been wondering where you've been. 923 00:53:28,250 --> 00:53:31,333 We have to talk about striker. 924 00:53:31,417 --> 00:53:35,750 No, no. You will stop at nothing, will you? 925 00:53:37,500 --> 00:53:40,959 Allison. Allison. 926 00:53:46,458 --> 00:53:50,041 Striker? Allison! 927 00:53:50,125 --> 00:53:51,125 Maggie. 928 00:53:52,125 --> 00:53:54,834 Allison, i'm... I'm so sorry. 929 00:53:56,458 --> 00:53:59,458 You can all just go to hell. 930 00:54:15,333 --> 00:54:17,083 Hey, you. 931 00:54:17,166 --> 00:54:20,417 Sorry about this whole party thing. 932 00:54:20,500 --> 00:54:22,750 My brother is kind of an asshole. 933 00:54:22,834 --> 00:54:24,458 Kind of? 934 00:54:24,542 --> 00:54:26,250 I'm seriously considering telling mom 935 00:54:26,333 --> 00:54:28,000 where he keeps his porn. 936 00:54:30,542 --> 00:54:32,500 That was a joke. 937 00:54:35,500 --> 00:54:38,250 Kelly, why do you hang out with me? 938 00:54:38,333 --> 00:54:40,375 I mean, you probably have better things to do 939 00:54:40,458 --> 00:54:45,041 than to, waste your time with a hapless loser. 940 00:54:45,125 --> 00:54:49,417 You're not a loser, berke. Allison thinks so. 941 00:54:49,500 --> 00:54:52,166 Allison's an idiot. 942 00:54:53,166 --> 00:54:54,917 I have done... 943 00:54:55,041 --> 00:54:59,083 Absolutely everything for that girl. 944 00:55:00,208 --> 00:55:02,333 She just doesn't get it. 945 00:55:38,583 --> 00:55:40,250 I can't do this. 946 00:55:45,625 --> 00:55:48,583 Kelly, I think you're great, but we can't... we can't do this. 947 00:55:50,417 --> 00:55:52,417 You're Felix's little sister. 948 00:55:56,917 --> 00:55:58,375 Screw you. 949 00:55:58,458 --> 00:56:01,709 Kelly, wait a second. That came out wrong! 950 00:56:04,542 --> 00:56:07,834 What was that? Felix, it's not what you think. 951 00:56:09,542 --> 00:56:12,500 What the hell has gotten into you? Aah. 952 00:56:15,583 --> 00:56:20,500 Well, well! Why am I suddenly glad we left the conference early? 953 00:56:20,583 --> 00:56:24,041 I don't recall anything about a party, berke. 954 00:56:24,125 --> 00:56:26,208 We could have sprung for a deejay. 955 00:56:26,291 --> 00:56:29,208 Make sure and put the furniture back when you're done. 956 00:56:29,291 --> 00:56:33,583 Mom, dad, reverend's daughter, Judy, just took a dump in our pool 957 00:56:33,667 --> 00:56:35,375 and you want to spring for a deejay? 958 00:56:35,458 --> 00:56:38,083 That's what makes us so fly! 959 00:56:38,500 --> 00:56:40,250 We trust you. 960 00:56:41,625 --> 00:56:44,959 You're my parents, for god's sakes. Stop trusting me! 961 00:56:50,792 --> 00:56:53,375 Poor Judy. I'll go get the skimmer. 962 00:57:07,709 --> 00:57:09,583 Well, this is pretty interesting. 963 00:57:09,667 --> 00:57:12,458 It was nothing. Kelly, I was there. 964 00:57:12,542 --> 00:57:15,917 He kissed you, and I don't know why he did it. 965 00:57:16,000 --> 00:57:17,851 I mean, berke's pretty screwed up right now, but... 966 00:57:17,875 --> 00:57:20,500 Look, I kissed him, too. 967 00:57:23,208 --> 00:57:28,417 And, yes, he is screwed up, and he likes someone else, and it's a problem, 968 00:57:28,500 --> 00:57:30,875 but, Felix, it's my problem. 969 00:57:37,458 --> 00:57:41,208 Look, you'd know I'd be lying if I said I was happy about this. 970 00:57:45,208 --> 00:57:50,166 But, um, if berke can't see what an amazing person you are... 971 00:57:52,041 --> 00:57:54,917 Then I'd say that he's the one with the problem. 972 00:57:58,375 --> 00:57:59,542 Good night. 973 00:58:25,417 --> 00:58:27,226 Hey, it's... it's me. It's berke. 974 00:58:27,250 --> 00:58:31,500 Just wanted to say thanks for all your help. 975 00:58:31,583 --> 00:58:36,333 The guy at the music store said that songwriters use these things, so... 976 00:58:36,417 --> 00:58:41,208 If anyone can fix forrest oates' song, it's... it's definitely you. 977 00:58:41,291 --> 00:58:45,208 Just know that i... I believe in you, Kelly. 978 00:58:45,291 --> 00:58:47,000 Um... break a leg. 979 00:58:47,083 --> 00:58:50,709 ♪ Now I've fallen in deep ♪ 980 00:58:50,792 --> 00:58:53,500 ♪ slow, silent sleep ♪ 981 00:58:53,583 --> 00:58:56,333 ♪ it's killing me ♪ 982 00:58:56,417 --> 00:59:01,083 ♪ I'm dying ♪ 983 00:59:30,834 --> 00:59:34,667 Hey, let's mess with the mortals one more time. 984 00:59:34,750 --> 00:59:37,000 Boyfriend'll be trippin' on this. 985 00:59:38,000 --> 00:59:40,583 One more dose for Mr. Morose. 986 00:59:40,667 --> 00:59:43,208 It's time for a little wake-up call. 987 00:59:43,291 --> 00:59:45,500 And I'm outta here. 988 00:59:49,291 --> 00:59:53,083 And in the woods, where the scents are sweet, 989 00:59:53,166 --> 00:59:56,375 there my lysander and myself shall meet. 990 01:00:06,291 --> 01:00:09,208 Maybe it's time you started dreaming of someone else. 991 01:00:09,291 --> 01:00:12,709 Berke. You were my first. 992 01:00:12,792 --> 01:00:14,583 No one's ever gonna replace you. 993 01:00:14,667 --> 01:00:18,250 I've dazzled my way into your ex-girlfriend's fancies. 994 01:00:18,333 --> 01:00:20,959 You were the quintessential high-school couple. 995 01:00:21,041 --> 01:00:24,959 She's not your girlfriend anymore, man. 996 01:00:25,041 --> 01:00:30,000 I'm moving on with my life, and you're moving on with yours. 997 01:00:30,083 --> 01:00:32,203 Are we freaking you out? Yeah, we're freaking him out. 998 01:00:43,709 --> 01:00:46,667 Dr. Forrest oates, the attendants' costumes just arrived. 999 01:00:46,750 --> 01:00:48,125 Thank Buddha. 1000 01:00:48,208 --> 01:00:50,250 And, your wife called. 1001 01:00:50,333 --> 01:00:53,291 She might not make it to tonight's performance. 1002 01:00:53,375 --> 01:00:54,750 Did she say why? 1003 01:00:54,834 --> 01:00:57,250 It was difficult to understand through the slur. 1004 01:00:59,834 --> 01:01:02,792 And, sir? There is one more thing. 1005 01:01:02,875 --> 01:01:05,792 Del molden, Jr. is sick. 1006 01:01:05,875 --> 01:01:09,125 My dance partner? 1007 01:01:09,208 --> 01:01:11,834 That's enough out of you, mcmouth! 1008 01:01:11,917 --> 01:01:15,166 Now, apparently, he got hold of some tainted fruit punch last night... 1009 01:01:15,250 --> 01:01:16,792 And won't be able to perform. 1010 01:01:16,875 --> 01:01:18,500 Not that it matters at all, 1011 01:01:18,583 --> 01:01:21,667 because the entire production's going down in flames, so... 1012 01:01:24,583 --> 01:01:26,166 That having been said, 1013 01:01:26,250 --> 01:01:28,166 I'm curious if anyone feels that they can fill 1014 01:01:28,250 --> 01:01:30,875 the little booze hound's place. 1015 01:01:32,750 --> 01:01:34,500 Good. Let me ask you this. 1016 01:01:34,583 --> 01:01:38,208 Is there anyone who, at all, is good on their feet? 1017 01:01:38,291 --> 01:01:42,834 A shuffle, or a turn, or an attitude of any kind 1018 01:01:42,917 --> 01:01:44,166 with a pose? 1019 01:01:44,250 --> 01:01:45,667 Well... 1020 01:01:45,750 --> 01:01:47,333 Sometimes, coach hibble 1021 01:01:47,417 --> 01:01:48,792 calls me crazy legs. 1022 01:01:48,875 --> 01:01:50,417 Does he? 1023 01:01:55,125 --> 01:01:56,709 Wait. Wait a second. 1024 01:01:56,792 --> 01:01:58,709 All right, maybe if you took a half step back 1025 01:01:58,792 --> 01:02:00,750 before the spin. 1026 01:02:00,834 --> 01:02:03,417 Ok, just follow my lead. 1027 01:02:03,500 --> 01:02:05,792 I learnt this from watching in the wings. 1028 01:02:07,166 --> 01:02:08,542 Wow! 1029 01:02:08,625 --> 01:02:09,875 Felix! 1030 01:02:09,959 --> 01:02:11,667 Kelly, shouldn't you be getting ready? 1031 01:02:11,750 --> 01:02:13,917 I am. I'm in makeup. 1032 01:02:14,000 --> 01:02:16,667 Listen, I need you to do a favor for me. 1033 01:02:21,917 --> 01:02:24,375 Ladies and gentlemen, please take your seats. 1034 01:02:24,458 --> 01:02:27,166 The performance is about to begin. 1035 01:02:27,917 --> 01:02:29,875 It's over. 1036 01:02:29,959 --> 01:02:32,500 After this one, I'll be directing on the streets. 1037 01:02:34,166 --> 01:02:38,083 ♪ All the doo-dah night all the doo-dah day ♪ 1038 01:02:38,166 --> 01:02:40,083 ♪ bet my money on a bobtail nag ♪ 1039 01:02:40,166 --> 01:02:42,834 ♪ somebody bet on the bay ♪ 1040 01:02:46,208 --> 01:02:47,375 Hey. 1041 01:02:48,458 --> 01:02:49,959 Break a leg. 1042 01:02:52,834 --> 01:02:54,125 Go... go ahead, Jessica. 1043 01:02:54,208 --> 01:02:55,583 Raise the curtain on the tragedy 1044 01:02:55,667 --> 01:02:57,959 that has befallen the bard's greatest comedy. 1045 01:02:58,041 --> 01:03:00,750 I'm praying for you, sir. Thanks. 1046 01:03:09,875 --> 01:03:12,917 ♪ Did ya ever read a Shakespeare play ♪ 1047 01:03:13,000 --> 01:03:17,750 ♪ ooh-ooh ♪ ♪ and never understand a word they say? ♪ 1048 01:03:17,834 --> 01:03:22,291 ♪ ♪ ♪ well, tonight we're gonna make things clear ♪ 1049 01:03:22,375 --> 01:03:24,625 ♪ 'cause Shakespeare's dead ♪ 1050 01:03:24,709 --> 01:03:27,750 ♪ but we're all here ♪ 1051 01:03:30,375 --> 01:03:33,083 ♪ William Shakespeare wrote a play ♪ 1052 01:03:33,166 --> 01:03:35,959 ♪ a long, long time ago ♪ 1053 01:03:36,041 --> 01:03:38,417 ♪ about this chick named hermia ♪ 1054 01:03:38,500 --> 01:03:40,959 ♪ and the two guys who loved her so ♪ ♪ whoa- ♪ 1055 01:03:41,041 --> 01:03:44,083 ♪ they said, hermia, please be my girl ♪ 1056 01:03:44,166 --> 01:03:46,917 ♪ but she only wanted one ♪ ♪ she wanted one ♪ 1057 01:03:47,000 --> 01:03:49,625 ♪ and the night the fairies came to play ♪ 1058 01:03:49,709 --> 01:03:52,458 ♪ that's the night we have our fun ♪ 1059 01:03:52,542 --> 01:03:55,417 ♪ 'cause I love him ♪ ♪ and I love her ♪ 1060 01:03:55,500 --> 01:03:58,333 ♪ if only her best friend he'd prefer ♪ 1061 01:03:58,417 --> 01:04:01,041 ♪ and so the fairies all hatched a scheme ♪ 1062 01:04:01,125 --> 01:04:03,208 ♪ in this boom-shacka-lacka-lacka ♪ 1063 01:04:03,291 --> 01:04:06,208 ♪ midsummer night's dream ♪ 1064 01:04:06,291 --> 01:04:08,959 ♪ midsummer night's dream ♪ 1065 01:04:09,041 --> 01:04:15,583 ♪ midsummer night's dream ♪ 1066 01:04:25,917 --> 01:04:28,542 Look, there's Helena. 1067 01:04:28,625 --> 01:04:30,375 Fair Helena. 1068 01:04:30,458 --> 01:04:34,333 Call you me fair? That fair again unsay. 1069 01:04:34,417 --> 01:04:37,041 Doesn't Kelly look beautiful? 1070 01:04:37,125 --> 01:04:40,250 Demetrius and lysander love your fair, hermia. 1071 01:04:41,667 --> 01:04:44,875 Happy fair. 1072 01:04:47,333 --> 01:04:51,166 ♪ Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh ♪ do it. 1073 01:04:51,250 --> 01:04:52,875 Yeah, baby. Do it. 1074 01:04:52,959 --> 01:04:58,709 ♪ Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh ooh-ooh-waah- ♪ 1075 01:04:58,792 --> 01:05:02,083 ♪ it's fun to be a fairy and fly from town to town ♪ 1076 01:05:02,166 --> 01:05:05,709 ♪ our fairy dust will keep you up you won't come down ♪ 1077 01:05:05,792 --> 01:05:09,417 ♪ yeah, it's fun to be a fairy and wear such pretty things ♪ 1078 01:05:09,500 --> 01:05:13,583 ♪ it's fun to carry love juice on your fairy wings, yeah ♪ 1079 01:05:13,667 --> 01:05:16,375 ♪ what fools these mortals be ♪ 1080 01:05:16,458 --> 01:05:21,083 ♪ that try to play at love and make a comedy, yeah ♪ 1081 01:05:21,166 --> 01:05:23,917 ♪ why can't these mortals learn ♪ 1082 01:05:24,000 --> 01:05:27,125 ♪ a fairy up above will never crash and burn ♪ 1083 01:05:27,208 --> 01:05:29,417 ♪ yeah, it's fun to be a fairy ♪ ♪ that's right ♪ 1084 01:05:29,500 --> 01:05:32,125 ♪ ooh-ooh-ooh, yeah it's fun to be a fairy ♪ 1085 01:05:32,208 --> 01:05:34,458 ♪ that's right ♪ ♪ ooh-ooh-ooh, yeah ♪ 1086 01:05:34,542 --> 01:05:38,125 ♪ it's fun to be a fairy - I like it ♪ 1087 01:05:38,208 --> 01:05:41,583 ♪ it's fun to be a fairy ♪ ♪ give it up, give it up give it up, give it up ♪ 1088 01:05:41,667 --> 01:05:45,917 ♪ it's fun to be a fairy ♪ it's fairy power! 1089 01:05:52,959 --> 01:05:55,959 That was, that was ok! 1090 01:05:57,166 --> 01:06:00,417 Relent... Sweet hermia. 1091 01:06:00,500 --> 01:06:03,291 And, lysander, yield thy crazed title 1092 01:06:03,375 --> 01:06:06,000 to my certain right. 1093 01:06:06,083 --> 01:06:08,834 You have her father's love, Demetrius. 1094 01:06:08,917 --> 01:06:11,166 Let me have hermia's. 1095 01:06:12,041 --> 01:06:14,667 Do you marry him? 1096 01:06:15,500 --> 01:06:18,625 Shit, butt-wanker. Dick-weed. 1097 01:06:18,709 --> 01:06:21,917 It's so real, you can almost feel the tension. 1098 01:06:22,000 --> 01:06:23,083 Word. 1099 01:06:23,166 --> 01:06:28,166 ♪ Whoo-ooh-ooh why won't you love me? ♪ 1100 01:06:28,250 --> 01:06:32,458 ♪ Whoo-ooh-ooh whoo-ooh-ooh-ooh ♪ 1101 01:06:32,542 --> 01:06:36,583 ♪ there's a girl ♪ ♪ who says she don't love me ♪ 1102 01:06:36,667 --> 01:06:40,750 ♪ so that's the girl ♪ ♪ that I got to have ♪ 1103 01:06:40,834 --> 01:06:45,542 ♪ I'll tell you why ♪ ♪ she's everything a girl ought to be ♪ 1104 01:06:45,625 --> 01:06:48,625 ♪ and that is why ♪ ♪ I can't understand ♪ 1105 01:06:48,709 --> 01:06:51,667 ♪ why she don't love me ♪ no ♪ 1106 01:06:51,750 --> 01:06:53,458 ♪ hermia ♪ 1107 01:06:53,542 --> 01:06:56,000 ♪ I'll make you love me ♪ 1108 01:06:56,083 --> 01:06:58,166 ♪ hermia ♪ 1109 01:06:58,250 --> 01:07:01,000 ♪ I'll make you care ♪ 1110 01:07:01,083 --> 01:07:04,000 ♪ never before has a girl ♪ 1111 01:07:04,083 --> 01:07:05,166 ♪ hurt me more ♪ 1112 01:07:05,250 --> 01:07:09,166 ♪ I'm begging hermia ♪ 1113 01:07:09,250 --> 01:07:12,000 ♪ please love me ♪ 1114 01:07:12,083 --> 01:07:13,083 Bitch. Panzy. 1115 01:07:13,125 --> 01:07:14,166 ♪ Why won't you love me? ♪ 1116 01:07:14,250 --> 01:07:16,125 ♪ Please love me ♪ 1117 01:07:16,208 --> 01:07:18,083 Asshole. 1118 01:07:32,125 --> 01:07:36,208 I'll apply to your eye gentle lover's remedy. 1119 01:07:36,291 --> 01:07:38,250 And when thou wakest, 1120 01:07:38,333 --> 01:07:40,500 thou will takest true delight... 1121 01:07:40,583 --> 01:07:43,250 In the sight of thy true lover's eye. 1122 01:07:49,083 --> 01:07:51,834 Ok, people, we're back in 20. 1123 01:07:51,917 --> 01:07:55,041 Berke, berke, I, um, I want to talk to you about something. 1124 01:07:55,125 --> 01:07:57,208 Can we go somewhere? Yeah. 1125 01:07:57,291 --> 01:07:58,667 Thank you. 1126 01:08:03,750 --> 01:08:04,917 Well. 1127 01:08:06,333 --> 01:08:09,250 I could use a drink. Yeah. 1128 01:08:09,333 --> 01:08:11,768 Kaisha, you're just not equipped to deal with this. I'm talking equipment. 1129 01:08:11,792 --> 01:08:14,917 Hardware. We're talking 800 number. She wants a blow-up doll, right? 1130 01:08:15,000 --> 01:08:17,291 I called them once for advice. 1131 01:08:17,375 --> 01:08:19,250 Really? 1132 01:08:19,333 --> 01:08:22,166 Yeah. I had zits on my balls. 1133 01:08:23,333 --> 01:08:25,291 They're gone now. 1134 01:08:27,166 --> 01:08:30,083 Gentlemen, I'm here for a favor. 1135 01:08:30,166 --> 01:08:32,250 In act four, scene one, 1136 01:08:32,333 --> 01:08:35,250 there's a particular effects cue. 1137 01:08:35,333 --> 01:08:38,917 The volk tube crescendo. 1138 01:08:39,000 --> 01:08:40,458 Right. Now, is this the one? 1139 01:08:40,542 --> 01:08:44,792 No. That one could take out a village. 1140 01:08:44,875 --> 01:08:47,417 I see. 1141 01:08:47,500 --> 01:08:50,125 Well, I was wondering if you might be able 1142 01:08:50,208 --> 01:08:53,500 to detonate it a bit... Early. 1143 01:08:53,583 --> 01:08:56,333 Isn't that before Mr. Lander's cross? 1144 01:08:56,417 --> 01:08:58,250 Look, all it'll do is scare him. 1145 01:08:58,333 --> 01:09:00,834 I can signal you by raising my sword like this. 1146 01:09:03,208 --> 01:09:07,291 Look, about this whole thing with striker, I'm sorry I didn't believe you. 1147 01:09:07,375 --> 01:09:11,959 I'm sorry you had to find out like that. It kinda sucked. 1148 01:09:12,041 --> 01:09:16,500 Look, i... I know I don't deserve to ask you anything right now, but... 1149 01:09:16,583 --> 01:09:19,458 If I could just have one wish, 1150 01:09:19,542 --> 01:09:24,250 it would be that we could go back to the way things were. 1151 01:09:24,333 --> 01:09:25,667 You know? 1152 01:09:25,750 --> 01:09:29,959 I... I mean, the friends part. Yeah, sure. 1153 01:09:31,458 --> 01:09:34,083 And as for the rest of it, well... 1154 01:09:41,709 --> 01:09:44,250 We'll just leave it up to fate. 1155 01:09:51,041 --> 01:09:55,625 Did I mention there was $47 in it for you? 1156 01:09:56,375 --> 01:09:58,166 Not bad. 1157 01:09:58,250 --> 01:10:02,959 I believe, Mr. Scrumfeld, 1158 01:10:03,041 --> 01:10:04,291 we have an understanding. 1159 01:10:04,375 --> 01:10:09,041 Remember, gentlemen, when I raise my sword. 1160 01:10:13,834 --> 01:10:16,834 Hey, the... the music's been, been... been good, 1161 01:10:16,917 --> 01:10:20,709 but, you know that song, "a pocketful of, dreams?" 1162 01:10:20,792 --> 01:10:23,250 Down here we call it "pocketful of ass." Yeah, that's the one. 1163 01:10:23,333 --> 01:10:25,542 Listen, there's been a change of plans. 1164 01:10:29,125 --> 01:10:31,208 This is different. 1165 01:10:39,500 --> 01:10:42,041 A spell had been cast, 1166 01:10:42,125 --> 01:10:44,375 the lovers sleep, 1167 01:10:44,458 --> 01:10:46,375 though in repose, 1168 01:10:46,458 --> 01:10:50,291 fair Helena's love for Demetrius grows. 1169 01:10:55,000 --> 01:10:57,875 O weary night, 1170 01:10:57,959 --> 01:10:59,333 abate thy hours. 1171 01:11:01,500 --> 01:11:04,375 Steal me awhile from my own company. 1172 01:11:11,166 --> 01:11:15,250 ♪ Let me sleep ♪ 1173 01:11:15,333 --> 01:11:18,750 ♪ for when I sleep I dream ♪ 1174 01:11:18,834 --> 01:11:22,291 ♪ that you are here ♪ 1175 01:11:22,375 --> 01:11:25,208 ♪ you're mine ♪ 1176 01:11:25,291 --> 01:11:27,458 ♪ and all my fears ♪ 1177 01:11:27,542 --> 01:11:30,083 ♪ are left behind ♪ 1178 01:11:30,166 --> 01:11:32,417 ♪ I float ♪ 1179 01:11:32,500 --> 01:11:34,625 ♪ on air ♪ 1180 01:11:34,709 --> 01:11:37,750 ♪ the nightingale sings ♪ 1181 01:11:37,834 --> 01:11:42,291 ♪ gentle lullabies ♪ 1182 01:11:42,375 --> 01:11:47,458 ♪ so let me close my eyes ♪ 1183 01:11:47,542 --> 01:11:49,500 Jessica! Jessica! 1184 01:11:49,583 --> 01:11:54,417 ♪ And sleep perchance to dream ♪ 1185 01:11:54,500 --> 01:11:58,125 ♪ so I can see the face ♪ 1186 01:11:58,208 --> 01:12:01,959 ♪ I long to touch ♪ 1187 01:12:02,041 --> 01:12:04,291 ♪ to kiss ♪ 1188 01:12:04,375 --> 01:12:06,458 ♪ but only dreams ♪ 1189 01:12:06,542 --> 01:12:08,625 ♪ can bring me this ♪ 1190 01:12:08,709 --> 01:12:13,625 ♪ so let the moon ♪ 1191 01:12:13,709 --> 01:12:17,291 ♪ shine softly on the boy ♪ 1192 01:12:17,375 --> 01:12:21,333 ♪ I long to see ♪ 1193 01:12:21,417 --> 01:12:26,500 ♪ and maybe when he dreams ♪ 1194 01:12:26,583 --> 01:12:31,583 ♪ he'll dream of me ♪ 1195 01:12:38,792 --> 01:12:43,500 ♪ Hide beneath the clouds ♪ 1196 01:12:43,583 --> 01:12:48,500 ♪ and whisper to the evening star ♪ 1197 01:12:48,583 --> 01:12:50,500 ♪ they tell me love ♪ 1198 01:12:50,583 --> 01:12:55,500 ♪ is just a dream away ♪ 1199 01:12:55,583 --> 01:12:59,542 ♪ dream away ♪ 1200 01:12:59,625 --> 01:13:04,166 ♪ I'll dream away ♪ 1201 01:13:19,750 --> 01:13:24,667 ♪ So let the moon ♪ 1202 01:13:24,750 --> 01:13:28,500 ♪ shine softly on the boy ♪ 1203 01:13:28,583 --> 01:13:32,583 ♪ I long to see ♪ 1204 01:13:32,667 --> 01:13:37,583 ♪ and maybe when he dreams ♪ 1205 01:13:37,667 --> 01:13:42,875 ♪ he'll dream of me ♪ 1206 01:13:49,208 --> 01:13:54,667 ♪ dream of me ♪ 1207 01:13:58,291 --> 01:13:59,667 Whoo! 1208 01:14:15,500 --> 01:14:19,667 Go bid the huntsmen. Wake them with... with their horns. 1209 01:14:25,709 --> 01:14:27,625 My lord, I shall reply amazedly, 1210 01:14:27,709 --> 01:14:30,458 half sleep, half waking. 1211 01:14:30,542 --> 01:14:31,583 I came with hermia hither. 1212 01:14:31,667 --> 01:14:34,625 Our intent was to be gone from Athens, so we might, 1213 01:14:34,709 --> 01:14:37,500 without the peril of athenian law, be wed. 1214 01:14:40,542 --> 01:14:42,166 However... 1215 01:14:42,250 --> 01:14:45,083 What? "However?" 1216 01:14:50,250 --> 01:14:53,083 My lord, 1217 01:14:53,166 --> 01:14:54,792 we slept and slept, 1218 01:14:54,875 --> 01:14:56,625 as well you know. 1219 01:14:56,709 --> 01:14:59,083 Things did change, 1220 01:14:59,166 --> 01:15:01,417 as love did grow. 1221 01:15:03,166 --> 01:15:05,166 Although, 1222 01:15:05,250 --> 01:15:10,667 in ways, fair hermia's soul and mine shall forever intertwine. 1223 01:15:10,750 --> 01:15:13,417 Alas, we must forever part, 1224 01:15:14,917 --> 01:15:19,417 for lo, to another belongs this heart. 1225 01:15:41,542 --> 01:15:45,458 Wait a second! Wait a second. You can't do that! 1226 01:15:45,542 --> 01:15:49,166 You can't just change 400-year-old literature! 1227 01:15:49,250 --> 01:15:51,875 It's not even supposed to rhyme! 1228 01:15:51,959 --> 01:15:54,500 Fine. 1229 01:15:54,583 --> 01:15:57,166 I could do it, too. I do not like it in a moat. 1230 01:15:57,250 --> 01:16:02,333 I do not like it in a boat. I do not like it in a car. Now, how's that? 1231 01:16:02,417 --> 01:16:05,166 Boo! 1232 01:16:05,250 --> 01:16:07,000 Stop cheering. 1233 01:16:08,250 --> 01:16:09,792 Stop cheering! 1234 01:16:10,750 --> 01:16:13,667 Stop cheering! Do it now! 1235 01:16:13,750 --> 01:16:16,375 Stop... whoa! 1236 01:16:27,917 --> 01:16:29,750 Thanks. You're welcome. 1237 01:16:44,500 --> 01:16:46,709 What is that? 1238 01:16:46,792 --> 01:16:48,458 It's applause, sir. 1239 01:16:57,834 --> 01:17:00,375 Thank you. Thank you! 1240 01:17:01,834 --> 01:17:04,000 Thank you! 1241 01:17:22,041 --> 01:17:23,250 My god. Are you crying? 1242 01:17:23,333 --> 01:17:25,875 No, you're just squeezing my puncture wound. 1243 01:17:33,875 --> 01:17:36,083 Make it a little more like this. 1244 01:17:37,709 --> 01:17:40,667 You were trying to fly into my seat, weren't you? No. 1245 01:17:40,750 --> 01:17:43,625 Come on. Well, maybe just a little. 1246 01:17:43,709 --> 01:17:47,500 See, I knew it. You're so bad, yet I love it. 1247 01:17:47,583 --> 01:17:51,792 Just... just hold on for one... second. 1248 01:17:51,875 --> 01:17:54,709 I'll... I'll be right back, ok? 1249 01:17:56,291 --> 01:17:57,375 So... 1250 01:17:58,959 --> 01:18:01,000 You and my sister? 1251 01:18:01,083 --> 01:18:03,500 You're not gonna hit me again, are you? No. 1252 01:18:03,583 --> 01:18:06,834 No, but I'm not thrilled. All right, man? 1253 01:18:06,917 --> 01:18:09,000 But if it has to be somebody, 1254 01:18:09,083 --> 01:18:12,875 um, I'm kinda glad it's you. 1255 01:18:12,959 --> 01:18:14,083 Thanks. 1256 01:18:16,875 --> 01:18:18,166 Hey, kel. Hey. 1257 01:18:18,250 --> 01:18:19,890 Hey, good job tonight. You guys were good. 1258 01:18:19,917 --> 01:18:21,834 You guys were funny. Thanks. 1259 01:18:21,917 --> 01:18:23,667 Listen, i'm, I gotta go. 1260 01:18:23,750 --> 01:18:26,875 You and dora Lynn. Yeah. 1261 01:18:26,959 --> 01:18:28,834 Aren't you kind of worried about the whole... 1262 01:18:28,917 --> 01:18:30,875 Accident-prone? No, no. 1263 01:18:30,959 --> 01:18:35,083 Well, I think dora Lynn's about to have a change of luck. 1264 01:18:35,166 --> 01:18:37,875 Go, Felix. I'll see you guys later. 1265 01:18:37,959 --> 01:18:39,834 All right. Let's get some dim sum. 1266 01:18:39,917 --> 01:18:41,125 Bye, berke. 1267 01:18:42,959 --> 01:18:44,917 My god. 1268 01:18:45,000 --> 01:18:47,166 That's ok. That's fine. 1269 01:18:47,250 --> 01:18:51,917 And he blew off that stage 20 feet at least. 1270 01:18:52,000 --> 01:18:53,834 And then she took off 1271 01:18:53,917 --> 01:18:57,083 like this beautiful spaceship into the night. 1272 01:19:04,000 --> 01:19:05,875 Dude, we burned the shit out of his face. 1273 01:19:05,959 --> 01:19:08,667 Tomorrow night, same thing. 1274 01:19:11,959 --> 01:19:14,875 So my theatrical debut... 1275 01:19:15,000 --> 01:19:16,959 What did you think? 1276 01:19:17,041 --> 01:19:19,458 You came on pretty strong in that last act. 1277 01:19:19,542 --> 01:19:22,083 Yeah, I was good. 1278 01:19:22,166 --> 01:19:24,750 So you know we gotta do this again tomorrow night. 1279 01:19:24,834 --> 01:19:26,458 How do you think it's gonna end? 1280 01:19:28,000 --> 01:19:31,959 We could bring back the always popular big red song. 1281 01:19:32,041 --> 01:19:34,917 I'd rather be shot again with an arrow. 1282 01:19:35,000 --> 01:19:36,750 I thought it was a prop. 1283 01:19:36,834 --> 01:19:38,208 Yeah, yeah. 1284 01:19:48,041 --> 01:19:50,125 ♪ Do you remember ♪ 1285 01:19:50,208 --> 01:19:53,917 ♪ the 21st night of September? ♪ 1286 01:19:54,000 --> 01:19:57,959 ♪ Love was changing the minds of pretenders ♪ 1287 01:19:58,041 --> 01:20:01,792 ♪ while chasing the clouds away ♪ 1288 01:20:01,875 --> 01:20:03,417 ♪ hey-yeah, yeah ♪ 1289 01:20:03,500 --> 01:20:05,291 ♪ our hearts were ringin' ♪ 1290 01:20:05,375 --> 01:20:09,166 ♪ in the key that our souls were singin' ♪ 1291 01:20:09,250 --> 01:20:13,291 ♪ and as we danced in the night remember ♪ 1292 01:20:13,375 --> 01:20:17,959 ♪ how the stars stole the night away ♪ 1293 01:20:18,041 --> 01:20:20,000 ♪ everybody, sing yeah ♪ 1294 01:20:20,083 --> 01:20:22,417 ♪ ba-de-ya say do you remember ♪ 1295 01:20:22,500 --> 01:20:25,166 ♪ say that you remember ♪ ♪ ba-de-ya ♪ 1296 01:20:25,250 --> 01:20:27,291 Dancing in September ♪ ♪ yeah, whoo-ooh ♪ 1297 01:20:27,375 --> 01:20:32,000 ♪ ba-de-ya never was a cloudy day ♪ 1298 01:20:32,083 --> 01:20:35,959 ♪ there never there never, yeah ♪ 1299 01:20:36,041 --> 01:20:37,959 ♪ ba-de-ya, ba-de-ya ♪ ♪ hey ♪ 1300 01:20:38,041 --> 01:20:42,333 ♪ do you feel it do you feel it? ♪ ♪ ba-de-ya, ba-de-ya ♪ 1301 01:20:42,417 --> 01:20:44,166 ♪ hey ♪ ♪ ba-de-ya, ba-de-ya ♪ 1302 01:20:44,250 --> 01:20:47,166 ♪ ooh, ooh-ooh ♪ ♪ ba-da-ba-da-yea ♪ 1303 01:20:47,250 --> 01:20:50,041 ♪ somebody help me sing ♪ 1304 01:20:50,125 --> 01:20:51,667 ♪ my thoughts are with you ♪ 1305 01:20:51,750 --> 01:20:55,667 ♪ holding hands with your heart to see you ♪ 1306 01:20:55,750 --> 01:20:59,667 ♪ and only blue talk and love remember ♪ 1307 01:20:59,750 --> 01:21:04,000 ♪ how we knew love was here to stay ♪ 1308 01:21:04,083 --> 01:21:07,333 ♪ now December ♪ 1309 01:21:07,417 --> 01:21:11,458 ♪ I found the love that we shared in September ♪ 1310 01:21:11,542 --> 01:21:15,875 ♪ only blue talk and love remember ♪ 1311 01:21:15,959 --> 01:21:20,250 ♪ true love we share today ♪ 1312 01:21:20,333 --> 01:21:22,709 ♪ ooh-ooh, sing it ♪ ♪ ba-de-ya ♪ 1313 01:21:22,792 --> 01:21:25,500 ♪ what you say now? ♪ ♪ Say do you remember ♪ 1314 01:21:25,583 --> 01:21:27,375 ♪ ba-de-ya ♪ ♪ hey, what you say now? ♪ 1315 01:21:27,458 --> 01:21:29,208 ♪ Dancing in September ♪ ♪ ooh! ♪ 1316 01:21:29,291 --> 01:21:31,041 ♪ Ba-de-ya ♪ ♪ come on ♪ 1317 01:21:31,125 --> 01:21:33,583 ♪ never was a cloudy day ♪ 1318 01:21:33,667 --> 01:21:37,208 ♪ there never there never, whoa ♪ 1319 01:21:37,291 --> 01:21:39,041 ♪ ba-de-ya, ba-de-ya ♪ ♪ hey ♪ 1320 01:21:39,125 --> 01:21:41,041 ♪ ba-de-ya, ba-de-ya ♪ ♪ do you feel it? ♪ 1321 01:21:41,125 --> 01:21:44,875 ♪ Ba-de-ya, ba-de-ya ba-de-ya ♪ ♪ do you feel it? Hey ♪ 1322 01:21:44,959 --> 01:21:49,375 ♪ ba-de-ya, ba-de-ya ba-de-ba-de-yea ♪ ♪ right ooh ♪ 1323 01:21:49,458 --> 01:21:53,041 ♪ bring it down right now ♪ 1324 01:21:53,125 --> 01:21:56,417 ♪ the bells were ringing ♪ 1325 01:21:56,500 --> 01:22:00,709 ♪ our love was singing ♪ 1326 01:22:00,792 --> 01:22:02,083 ♪ do you remember ♪ 1327 01:22:02,166 --> 01:22:06,083 ♪ never a cloudy day ♪ 1328 01:22:06,166 --> 01:22:08,083 ♪ somebody help me sing ♪ 1329 01:22:08,166 --> 01:22:11,083 ♪ ba-de-ya say do you remember ♪ ♪ yeah ♪ 1330 01:22:11,166 --> 01:22:13,917 ♪ say that you remember ♪ ♪ ba-de-ya ♪ 1331 01:22:14,000 --> 01:22:17,750 ♪ dancing in September ba-de-ya ♪ ♪ it never rain, rain ♪ 1332 01:22:17,834 --> 01:22:22,125 ♪ never was a cloudy day ♪ ♪ never a cloudy day ♪ 1333 01:22:22,208 --> 01:22:23,542 ♪ ooh-ooh sing it ♪ 1334 01:22:23,625 --> 01:22:25,750 ♪ ba-de-ya, ba-de-ya ♪ ♪ what you say now? ♪ 1335 01:22:25,834 --> 01:22:27,750 ♪ Ba-de-ya, ba-de-ya ♪ ♪ sing it again ♪ 1336 01:22:27,834 --> 01:22:32,542 ♪ ba-de-ya, ba-de-ya ba-de-ya ♪ ♪ what you say now? Ooh ♪ 1337 01:22:32,625 --> 01:22:35,917 ♪ what you say now? Hey ♪ 1338 01:22:36,000 --> 01:22:39,208 ♪ yeah-yeah ♪ 1339 01:22:39,291 --> 01:22:40,542 ♪ hey, hey ♪ 1340 01:22:40,625 --> 01:22:44,166 ♪ come on sing it again ♪ 1341 01:22:44,250 --> 01:22:46,125 ♪ come on ♪ 1342 01:22:46,208 --> 01:22:49,125 ♪ sing it again yeah-hey-hey ♪ 1343 01:22:49,208 --> 01:22:54,125 ♪ ba-de-yea ♪♪ ♪ 1344 01:22:54,208 --> 01:22:58,125 ♪ ba-de-ya, ba-de-ya ba-de-ya, ba-de-ya ♪ ♪ 1345 01:22:58,208 --> 01:23:00,750 ♪ Sing it again whoa, yeah ♪ 1346 01:23:00,834 --> 01:23:04,792 ♪ ba-de-ya, ba-de-ya ba-de-ya ♪ ♪♪ 1347 01:23:04,875 --> 01:23:09,542 ♪ ba-de-ba-de-yeah ♪ 1348 01:23:20,834 --> 01:23:26,375 ♪ It's so funny to be seein' you after so long girl ♪ 1349 01:23:26,458 --> 01:23:29,542 ♪ and with the way you look I understand ♪ 1350 01:23:29,625 --> 01:23:32,625 ♪ that you are not impressed ♪ 1351 01:23:32,709 --> 01:23:38,208 ♪ but I heard you let that little friend of mine ♪ 1352 01:23:38,291 --> 01:23:41,583 ♪ take off your party dress ♪ 1353 01:23:43,583 --> 01:23:47,792 ♪ I'm not going to get too sentimental ♪ 1354 01:23:47,875 --> 01:23:52,458 ♪ like those other sticky valentines ♪ 1355 01:23:54,625 --> 01:23:59,125 ♪ 'cause I don't know if you've been loving somebody ♪ 1356 01:23:59,208 --> 01:24:03,125 ♪ I only know it isn't mine ♪ 1357 01:24:05,291 --> 01:24:09,750 ♪ Alison ♪ 1358 01:24:09,834 --> 01:24:15,166 ♪ I know this world is killing you ♪ 1359 01:24:15,250 --> 01:24:20,000 ♪ Alison ♪ 1360 01:24:22,125 --> 01:24:25,458 ♪ my aim is true ♪ 1361 01:24:28,750 --> 01:24:32,208 ♪ well I see you've got a husband now ♪ 1362 01:24:32,291 --> 01:24:35,208 ♪ did he leave your pretty fingers lying ♪ 1363 01:24:35,291 --> 01:24:37,917 ♪ in the wedding cake? ♪ 1364 01:24:38,000 --> 01:24:42,667 ♪ You used to hold him right in your hand ♪ 1365 01:24:42,750 --> 01:24:47,125 ♪ I'll bet he took all he could take ♪ 1366 01:24:48,917 --> 01:24:53,625 ♪ sometimes I wish that I could stop you from talking ♪ 1367 01:24:53,709 --> 01:24:58,333 ♪ when I hear the silly things that you say ♪ 1368 01:25:00,125 --> 01:25:04,208 ♪ I think somebody better put out the big light ♪ 1369 01:25:04,291 --> 01:25:09,667 ♪ 'cause I can't stand to see you this way ♪ 1370 01:25:11,000 --> 01:25:15,417 ♪ Alison ♪ 1371 01:25:15,500 --> 01:25:20,417 ♪ I know this world is killing you ♪ 1372 01:25:20,500 --> 01:25:25,500 ♪ Alison ♪ 1373 01:25:28,000 --> 01:25:31,166 ♪ my aim is true ♪ 1374 01:25:33,375 --> 01:25:36,583 ♪ my aim is true ♪ 1375 01:25:38,375 --> 01:25:42,041 ♪ my aim is true ♪ 1376 01:25:44,333 --> 01:25:47,750 ♪ my aim is true ♪ 1377 01:25:49,375 --> 01:25:52,750 ♪ my aim is true ♪ 1378 01:25:55,250 --> 01:25:58,375 ♪ my aim is true ♪ 1379 01:26:00,333 --> 01:26:04,000 ♪ my aim is true ♪ 1380 01:26:05,417 --> 01:26:09,166 ♪ my aim is true ♪ 1381 01:26:11,208 --> 01:26:14,625 ♪ my aim is true ♪