1 00:02:15,197 --> 00:02:17,131 Woe unto man. 2 00:02:17,199 --> 00:02:20,293 Brave Achilles, slain in trial by blood... 3 00:02:20,369 --> 00:02:23,270 for prize, the bride of Menelaus. 4 00:02:23,339 --> 00:02:27,105 And father of Antigone, ruler of Thebes, 5 00:02:27,176 --> 00:02:31,135 self-rendered sightless by lust for expiation. 6 00:02:31,213 --> 00:02:34,546 Lost victim of bewildered desire. 7 00:02:34,617 --> 00:02:37,381 Nor has Jason's wife fared better. 8 00:02:37,453 --> 00:02:41,787 Giving life only to reclaim it in vengeful fury. 9 00:02:41,857 --> 00:02:44,257 For to understand the ways of the heart... 10 00:02:44,327 --> 00:02:47,854 is to grasp as clearly the malice or ineptitude of the gods, 11 00:02:47,930 --> 00:02:51,525 who, in their vain and clumsy labors to create a flawless surrogate, 12 00:02:51,600 --> 00:02:54,694 have left mankind but dazed and incomplete. 13 00:02:54,770 --> 00:02:57,739 Take, for instance, the case of Lenny Weinrib, 14 00:02:57,807 --> 00:03:01,301 a tale as Greek and timeless as fate itself. 15 00:03:01,378 --> 00:03:03,812 - Lenny, let's have a baby. - Hey! 16 00:03:03,880 --> 00:03:06,815 A baby? Why? Because she's pregnant, you want to have a baby? 17 00:03:06,883 --> 00:03:08,976 - No. It's a great idea. - You could raise your own middleweight. 18 00:03:09,052 --> 00:03:10,986 - I don't want a middleweight. - Flyweight. 19 00:03:11,054 --> 00:03:14,319 - No, it'd be fun. - Have you ever had children? 20 00:03:14,391 --> 00:03:17,155 - No, I've never had children. - Why not? 21 00:03:17,227 --> 00:03:20,060 What do you mean, "why not?" 'Cause my first wife didn't want to have a child. 22 00:03:20,130 --> 00:03:22,325 - Then I never remarried really, so-- - Oh, that's great. 23 00:03:22,399 --> 00:03:24,333 - What am I, chopped liver? - Until now. 24 00:03:24,401 --> 00:03:26,335 - Yeah? - I never-- You didn't let me finish. 25 00:03:26,403 --> 00:03:28,496 - No, you'd forgotten. - Now you've changed your mind. You didn't want to have a child. 26 00:03:28,572 --> 00:03:31,197 - You should have kids. - It's like stereo. Give him a break. 27 00:03:31,242 --> 00:03:33,506 - You don't want a kid? - Oh, we-- 28 00:03:33,578 --> 00:03:38,208 When we first met, she didn't like the beach; she hated the Hamptons; 29 00:03:38,282 --> 00:03:41,615 she didn't want to have kids; she loved the Upper East Side, she didn't want to move. 30 00:03:41,686 --> 00:03:44,678 Now suddenly she's making noise about having a kid and moving to Tribeca. 31 00:03:44,756 --> 00:03:48,021 - Only if the gallery moves downtown. - Well, being pregnant is great. 32 00:03:48,092 --> 00:03:50,185 - Yeah? - I love it. You get treated like the Queen of England. 33 00:03:50,261 --> 00:03:52,195 - Sure. - You say that like it's a good thing. 34 00:03:52,263 --> 00:03:54,197 - Well, I like the pampering. - She does like it. 35 00:03:54,265 --> 00:03:55,899 - Yeah? - Yeah, it's fantastic. 36 00:03:55,967 --> 00:03:57,201 I can't give up the time right now. 37 00:03:57,269 --> 00:03:59,464 There are too many exciting things happening in my business. 38 00:03:59,538 --> 00:04:01,472 - So let me ask you a question. - What? 39 00:04:01,540 --> 00:04:04,805 How do you plan to swing it without being pregnant? I'm curious. 40 00:04:04,877 --> 00:04:06,868 - Good question. Very good question. - No, it's easy. 41 00:04:06,945 --> 00:04:08,970 - We'll adopt. Oh, well. - Mmm. 42 00:04:09,047 --> 00:04:10,981 - Not me. I don't want to adopt. - There you go. 43 00:04:11,049 --> 00:04:12,983 - Why not? That's a good idea. - No. No. 44 00:04:13,051 --> 00:04:15,542 - You must be nuts. With, with my genes? - Yeah? 45 00:04:15,621 --> 00:04:17,987 - To adopt? I have award-winning genes. - Oh, God. 46 00:04:18,056 --> 00:04:20,547 - I want to pass them on. - No, that's crazy. No, the-- 47 00:04:20,626 --> 00:04:22,493 It's for the same reason we don't lease a car, okay? 48 00:04:22,562 --> 00:04:24,496 - 'Cause it's pride of ownership. - Okay. 49 00:04:24,564 --> 00:04:26,555 - And I don't want to adopt a child. - No. Look, I'm sorry, Lenny. 50 00:04:26,633 --> 00:04:28,431 It's crazy 'cause the world is full of needy kids. 51 00:04:28,502 --> 00:04:30,436 - You know, she's right. - That's true. 52 00:04:30,504 --> 00:04:32,438 - I know, but that-- You know, but I-- - No, I mean it. 53 00:04:32,506 --> 00:04:36,169 Why overpopulate the world when there are thousands of parent-less kids? 54 00:04:36,243 --> 00:04:38,507 Just because you don't want to get morning sickness, right? 55 00:04:38,579 --> 00:04:40,672 - No, it's not true. - That's why you want to adopt a kid. 56 00:04:40,748 --> 00:04:42,841 I just can't afford to give up a year just now. 57 00:04:42,917 --> 00:04:45,579 Forget it. Subject is closed. I don't wanna-- 58 00:04:45,653 --> 00:04:48,019 I'd be afraid that I might get a bad seed. 59 00:04:48,088 --> 00:04:50,022 - Oh, you're paranoid. - Oh, come on. 60 00:04:50,090 --> 00:04:53,059 That's right! What-- You read that in the tabloids all the time. 61 00:04:53,127 --> 00:04:55,061 - No. A bad seed. - That's right. 62 00:04:55,129 --> 00:04:57,597 Yeah, we adopt some sweet little boy, and then he turns 13, 63 00:04:57,665 --> 00:05:00,293 we'd go to sleep at night, he'd split our head open with an axe. 64 00:05:00,367 --> 00:05:03,200 Listen, why'd you have to go and tell him that? You know Lenny's got a vivid imagination. 65 00:05:03,270 --> 00:05:05,534 - It's a common occurrence. - I read the same paper. What do you want me to tell you? 66 00:05:05,606 --> 00:05:08,905 Anyway, what do you mean "he"? Why can't we adopt a girl? 67 00:05:08,976 --> 00:05:10,069 - We're not adopting anything. I want no sex. - A little girl. 68 00:05:10,145 --> 00:05:12,613 Let the guy have a short stop or a point guard, will ya? 69 00:05:12,681 --> 00:05:14,979 Can we get a check? Can we-- Can we please get out of here? 70 00:05:15,050 --> 00:05:17,109 I'll take the check. I'm paying tonight. 71 00:05:17,185 --> 00:05:19,244 - Yes. - You? I'm stunned. 72 00:05:19,321 --> 00:05:23,451 You pay, you break your record. You-- One more and you break DiMaggio's record-- 56 straight. 73 00:05:23,525 --> 00:05:24,459 That's not true. Now, be nice. 74 00:05:24,527 --> 00:05:27,587 Laius, proud father, speak. 75 00:05:27,663 --> 00:05:30,928 I, with joy, did have a son... 76 00:05:31,000 --> 00:05:33,969 so fair, so clearheaded and brave, 77 00:05:34,036 --> 00:05:37,665 that I a thousand pleasures did derive from his presence. 78 00:05:37,740 --> 00:05:39,674 So what happens? 79 00:05:39,742 --> 00:05:41,801 One day he kills me. 80 00:05:41,878 --> 00:05:44,779 And don't you think, he runs off and marries my wife. 81 00:05:44,847 --> 00:05:47,748 Poor Oedipus, king of Thebes. 82 00:05:47,817 --> 00:05:50,944 My son, my son did slay unwittingly... 83 00:05:51,120 --> 00:05:53,054 my noble husband... 84 00:05:53,122 --> 00:05:55,855 and did, without realizing, hasten with me, 85 00:05:56,025 --> 00:05:58,560 his loving mother, to lustful bed. 86 00:05:58,628 --> 00:06:00,792 And a whole profession was born... 12 00:06:00,864 --> 00:06:03,028 charging sometimes 200 an hour, 13 00:06:03,200 --> 00:06:05,827 and a 50-minute hour at that. 14 00:06:05,902 --> 00:06:08,138 And why a child now, out of left field? 15 00:06:08,205 --> 00:06:11,731 One hopes it's not to fill some growing void in their marriage. 16 00:06:11,808 --> 00:06:13,042 Leave her be. 17 00:06:13,110 --> 00:06:16,640 A woman's urge to motherhood is old as the earth. 18 00:06:16,813 --> 00:06:18,841 Children grow up; they move out. 19 00:06:18,916 --> 00:06:21,776 Sometimes to ridiculous places like Cincinnati... 20 00:06:21,952 --> 00:06:24,086 or Boise, Idaho. 21 00:06:24,154 --> 00:06:25,988 Then you never see them again. 22 00:06:26,056 --> 00:06:28,222 You'd think once in a while they'd pick up a phone. 23 00:06:28,392 --> 00:06:31,122 But is there a growing void in the Weinrib's marriage? 24 00:06:31,295 --> 00:06:32,729 We didn't say there was. 25 00:06:32,797 --> 00:06:35,798 We're all just speculating on possible motives. 26 00:06:35,867 --> 00:06:37,601 Children are serious stuff. 27 00:06:37,769 --> 00:06:41,069 Look, here's a man who killed his father... 28 00:06:41,139 --> 00:06:43,073 and slept with his mother. 29 00:06:43,141 --> 00:06:45,277 I hate to tell you what they call my son in Harlem. 105 00:06:48,613 --> 00:06:50,047 Hello. 106 00:06:50,115 --> 00:06:53,642 - There's a baby we can adopt. - Are you serious? 107 00:06:53,719 --> 00:06:56,916 I spoke to Carolyn Hester and she's found an infant for us. 108 00:06:56,989 --> 00:07:00,425 - But we have to act quickly. - I don't want a kid. 109 00:07:00,492 --> 00:07:02,517 Well, Lenny, you know how hard it is. 110 00:07:02,595 --> 00:07:05,257 And look, the baby's one day old, totally healthy. 111 00:07:05,331 --> 00:07:07,024 Unwed mother, no diseases. 112 00:07:07,099 --> 00:07:09,092 And it's a boy. You wanted a boy. 113 00:07:09,168 --> 00:07:11,034 Amanda, I can't get into this with you now. 114 00:07:11,104 --> 00:07:13,102 This is not the place to have this discussion. 115 00:07:13,173 --> 00:07:15,803 I told Carolyn to be on the lookout. She's experienced with adoptions. 116 00:07:15,976 --> 00:07:19,177 She knows what she's doing. It's a boy, healthy, born this morning. 117 00:07:19,246 --> 00:07:21,678 No strings, if we act quickly. 118 00:07:21,748 --> 00:07:24,708 Le-- Look, I-- I gotta put my foot down. 119 00:07:24,785 --> 00:07:28,346 I-I-- If you want to discuss this another time, we can. 120 00:07:28,422 --> 00:07:32,017 But if you gotta have a fast answer, it's definitely "no." 121 00:07:32,092 --> 00:07:34,026 - Hi! Hi. 122 00:07:34,094 --> 00:07:36,187 - You got his head? - He's adorable. 123 00:07:36,263 --> 00:07:38,493 - Yes. Oh, God. 124 00:07:38,565 --> 00:07:41,830 This is great. This kid is never going to be a fighter, you know. 125 00:07:41,902 --> 00:07:44,963 I gotta run out and get some weights because he's really light as a feather. 126 00:07:45,039 --> 00:07:47,303 - Yeah, perhaps I should have him back. - Hi. 127 00:07:47,375 --> 00:07:49,034 Yeah. Maybe you better hold him 'cause he's crying. 128 00:07:49,111 --> 00:07:51,145 - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - He's crying. 129 00:07:51,213 --> 00:07:53,345 - Okay. Okay. It's okay. It's okay. 130 00:07:53,415 --> 00:07:55,049 - That's a good boy. - That's so great. 131 00:07:55,097 --> 00:07:57,614 If there's any greatness in my hands, let it pass into your body. 132 00:07:57,687 --> 00:08:01,453 - Get a grip on yourself. - This kid is gonna be a great kid! 133 00:08:01,524 --> 00:08:03,458 - Oh, yeah. - He's fabulous! 134 00:08:03,526 --> 00:08:05,460 - You're okay now. - What do you wanna call him? 135 00:08:05,528 --> 00:08:07,462 - Oh, this is unbelievable. Yeah. - Call him? 136 00:08:07,530 --> 00:08:10,624 - Oh, wh-- what about Eric? - Eric? The kid's not a Viking. 137 00:08:10,700 --> 00:08:13,567 I wanna call him, name him, you know, for one of my heroes. 138 00:08:13,636 --> 00:08:16,799 - Like what? - I don't know. What about Groucho? 139 00:08:16,873 --> 00:08:19,637 - Groucho? Oh, get real. - No, I'm serious. 140 00:08:19,709 --> 00:08:22,371 It's a great-- You know. I-- I don't know. What-- 141 00:08:22,445 --> 00:08:24,845 What about Phineas? Do you like Phineas? 142 00:08:24,914 --> 00:08:26,848 Phineas? Are you joking? 143 00:08:26,916 --> 00:08:29,476 Phineas is the guy who forecloses on the mortgage. 144 00:08:29,552 --> 00:08:32,316 I don't want to call this kid Phineas. He's adorable. 145 00:08:32,388 --> 00:08:34,482 - That's so great. What-- What, uh-- Let me think. - Well. 146 00:08:34,558 --> 00:08:36,492 - What about Django? - Django? 147 00:08:36,560 --> 00:08:39,028 Django, yeah. After Django Reinhardt, the great guitar player. 148 00:08:39,096 --> 00:08:42,827 - Django Weinrib? - That's the curse of the Weinrib name. 149 00:08:42,900 --> 00:08:45,164 - It doesn't go with anything. Nothing goes with Weinrib. - Well, okay, okay. 150 00:08:45,235 --> 00:08:47,726 What about something simple like, you know, Ben? 151 00:08:47,805 --> 00:08:49,932 - You want to call him Ben Weinrib? - Yeah. 152 00:08:50,007 --> 00:08:52,339 What, he's gonna be a-a-a gin rummy champion? 153 00:08:52,409 --> 00:08:54,934 - I mean, you know. - Yeah, well, you want to deny your heritage? Huh? 154 00:08:55,012 --> 00:08:57,572 Well, you know, I-I just want the kid to have a great name. 155 00:08:57,648 --> 00:09:00,116 - Yeah. - What about Sugar Ray Weinrib? 156 00:09:00,184 --> 00:09:02,118 Holden, after Holden Caulfield. 157 00:09:02,186 --> 00:09:05,417 You see, Holden is one of those things that works if we use your maiden name. 158 00:09:05,489 --> 00:09:08,884 - If it's Holden Sloane, but not Holden Weinrib. - Yeah. 159 00:09:08,959 --> 00:09:09,389 The kid is so cute! 160 00:09:09,462 --> 00:09:11,930 I can't believe he's-- What about Cole? 161 00:09:11,997 --> 00:09:14,795 - Cole? - Cole Weinrib. Harpo Weinrib. 162 00:09:14,867 --> 00:09:17,358 - Harpo? No. - How about Earl the Pearl Weinrib? 163 00:09:17,436 --> 00:09:20,064 - That would be so perfect. - Oh, God! No. 164 00:09:20,139 --> 00:09:22,972 - Okay, what-- what about Shane? You like the name Shane? - Yeah. 165 00:09:23,042 --> 00:09:24,976 - Shane's pretty. - Shane would be okay. 166 00:09:25,044 --> 00:09:29,105 On the other hand, you wouldn't want a Supreme Court Justice called Shane. 167 00:09:29,181 --> 00:09:31,809 Oh, Jesus. I got it. I got it. 168 00:09:31,884 --> 00:09:33,909 Brilliant. This is so brilliant. 169 00:09:33,986 --> 00:09:35,920 - Got it? Ready? Are you ready? - Mm-hmm. 170 00:09:35,988 --> 00:09:39,424 - Thelonius Weinrib. - Max! What about Max? 171 00:09:39,492 --> 00:09:40,517 - Max? - Yeah, Max. 172 00:09:40,594 --> 00:09:42,789 Max. Oh, look how cute he is. 173 00:09:42,863 --> 00:09:45,161 - I wanna hold him. Max is okay. - He's so sweet. He's smiling. 174 00:09:45,232 --> 00:09:47,666 - Dr. Max Weinrib. I like the name Max. - Yeah, Max is good. 175 00:09:47,734 --> 00:09:50,999 - It's simple. - How about Senator Max Weinrib? 176 00:09:51,071 --> 00:09:54,063 - Little tongue. - Rabbi Max-- Rabbi Max Weinrib? 177 00:09:54,141 --> 00:09:56,632 No. Maybe we should rethink Max for a minute. 178 00:09:56,710 --> 00:10:00,077 - Oh, he's so great. - He's happy. I think he likes us. 179 00:10:00,147 --> 00:10:02,615 - He looks like you. - He looks like me? 180 00:10:02,682 --> 00:10:04,115 Yeah. 181 00:10:04,184 --> 00:10:07,051 He looks like Broderick Crawford a little bit. 182 00:10:31,547 --> 00:10:33,640 - He's so smart. - Yeah. 183 00:10:33,715 --> 00:10:35,876 He picks up on everything. 184 00:10:35,951 --> 00:10:39,614 He's got a great personality. You know, you wake him up, he's always smiling and upbeat. 185 00:10:39,688 --> 00:10:41,622 - Like me. - You were like that when you were a baby. 186 00:10:41.732 --> 00:10:43,122 He's a round up writer 187 00:10:43,226 --> 00:10:45,285 and an art expert, right? 188 00:10:45,361 --> 00:10:47,829 Listen, when are you going to move the gallery downtown? 189 00:10:47,897 --> 00:10:50,832 Yeah, Mother, we don't want to get into that discussion 'cause, you know, 190 00:10:50,900 --> 00:10:55,030 I think we should move and Lenny is a devoted Upper East-sider. 191 00:10:55,104 --> 00:10:58,164 Or shall I say is opposed to change in any form? 192 00:10:58,241 --> 00:11:00,266 - I don't know. - It's unbelievable. 193 00:11:00,343 --> 00:11:03,835 The kid is unbelievable. I got him trains, he put 'em together himself. 194 00:11:03,913 --> 00:11:06,973 Trains? I thought you bought him an Erector Set. 195 00:11:07,050 --> 00:11:09,518 I got him an Erector Set, yeah. And-- And I also got him this tricycle. 196 00:11:09,586 --> 00:11:12,111 - Wait. And the whole plastic kitchen? - Max, I got you a tricycle. 197 00:11:12,188 --> 00:11:14,122 Lenny, you can't buy him so much. 198 00:11:14,190 --> 00:11:16,351 - Max, I got you a tricycle. - Look at that! 199 00:11:16,426 --> 00:11:19,361 - You can't buy him so much stuff. 200 00:11:19,429 --> 00:11:21,624 - No, no. I also got him skates. - Skates? 201 00:11:21,698 --> 00:11:24,395 Yeah. And I got a couple more things on the way in, you know. 202 00:11:24,468 --> 00:11:26,663 A small truck is gonna pull up in front of the house. 203 00:11:26,737 --> 00:11:29,433 - What are you gonna get next year? - Does anyone want anything to drink? 204 00:11:30,641 --> 00:11:32,506 - Go ahead. Shoot. 205 00:11:32,576 --> 00:11:34,510 Try again. 206 00:11:34,578 --> 00:11:37,479 You ever think about what you want to be when you grow up, Max? 207 00:11:37,548 --> 00:11:41,006 Hmm, I don't know. Maybe an interior decorator. 208 00:11:41,085 --> 00:11:42,715 - What? - Just kidding, just kidding. 209 00:11:42,787 --> 00:11:44,821 Well, don't kid. Here. Come on. 210 00:11:53,231 --> 00:11:56,166 Okay, those go in the bedroom. Okay, you follow me. 211 00:11:56,234 --> 00:11:58,668 - Give me a hand with this. - Why did we move? 212 00:11:58,737 --> 00:12:01,001 What do you mean, "Why did we move?" I told you. 213 00:12:01,072 --> 00:12:03,632 We moved 'cause-- 'cause, you know, 'cause your mother wanted to move. 214 00:12:03,708 --> 00:12:08,111 'Cause, you know, the art gallery she works at has moved downtown... 215 00:12:08,179 --> 00:12:10,409 and, you know, she wanted to move. 216 00:12:10,482 --> 00:12:12,882 - Here's your football. - Who's the boss between you and Mommy? 217 00:12:12,951 --> 00:12:15,920 - What is the question? - Who's the boss between you and Mommy? 218 00:12:15,987 --> 00:12:16,921 Who is the boss? You have to ask that? 219 00:12:16,989 --> 00:12:19,184 - You don't know who the boss is between me and Mommy? - No. 220 00:12:19,258 --> 00:12:22,354 I'm the boss, okay? Mommy-- Mommy's only the decision maker. 221 00:12:22,429 --> 00:12:25,364 You know, there's a difference between, uh-- 222 00:12:25,432 --> 00:12:29,459 You know, Mommy-- Mommy says what we do and, and, uh, 223 00:12:29,536 --> 00:12:32,699 I have control of the channel changer. 224 00:12:32,773 --> 00:12:35,139 - Here-- Here's your crayons. - Thanks. 225 00:12:35,208 --> 00:12:38,473 We're new in the neighborhood and we want Max to be really in the best school. 226 00:12:38,545 --> 00:12:41,139 - Oh, but this is it. - It's 'cause he's a very, very bright kid. 227 00:12:41,214 --> 00:12:43,148 - I mean, really bright. - Yeah, he's really great. 228 00:12:43,216 --> 00:12:45,650 Yes, I know. I saw his test scores and they're wonderful. 229 00:12:45,719 --> 00:12:48,017 - They are. Yeah. - I know. And he's got a great sense of humor. 230 00:12:48,088 --> 00:12:51,489 - He's a sweet kid. He's a really sweet kid. - He's got a great personality. 231 00:12:51,558 --> 00:12:53,753 Wonderful. Well, I wanted to talk to you about a special program... 232 00:12:53,827 --> 00:12:55,761 that we have for bright students. 233 00:12:55,829 --> 00:12:57,763 - Really? And he qualifies? 234 00:12:57,831 --> 00:12:59,822 - Oh, yes. Absolutely. - Sorry. Excuse me. 235 00:12:59,900 --> 00:13:03,199 - Certainly. - Because-- when you hear his syntax, 236 00:13:03,270 --> 00:13:05,204 - Hello? Oh, hi. - it's amazing. 237 00:13:05,272 --> 00:13:07,502 - Verbal skills are telling. - His vocabulary is good, but his syntax is-- 238 00:13:07,574 --> 00:13:09,508 - Oh, great. - He speaks like a grown-up. 239 00:13:09,576 --> 00:13:11,669 - Sorry. Lenny? - What we can do is-- 240 00:13:11,745 --> 00:13:12,975 - Sorry. Excuse me. - Oh, certainly. 241 00:13:13,047 --> 00:13:15,539 Can we meet the Dorians tonight for dinner at Le Cirque? 242 00:13:15,617 --> 00:13:19,018 The Dorians? No. Because we have tickets to the Edward Albee play. 243 00:13:19,088 --> 00:13:22,524 - Listen, I can't. - We have to. We've been waiting for so long. 244 00:13:22,591 --> 00:13:25,253 You don't have to go, but I really should go. 245 00:13:25,327 --> 00:13:27,454 I, uh-- No. 246 00:13:27,529 --> 00:13:30,430 - This will be the second time this week we cancelled something. - Go with Bud. 247 00:13:30,499 --> 00:13:33,024 - Oh, okay. - I don't want to go with Bud. I'm not married to Bud. 248 00:13:33,102 --> 00:13:35,195 Listen, go. Can we not discuss it now? 249 00:13:35,270 --> 00:13:37,738 Oh, my God! That was embarrassing. 250 00:13:37,806 --> 00:13:40,833 Well, just because I don't want to have dinner yet again with the world's dullest couple. 251 00:13:40,910 --> 00:13:43,140 Yeah, well, someday they may sponsor me for my own gallery. 252 00:13:43,213 --> 00:13:45,147 - I said I'd go. I'm going with you. - Yeah? 253 00:13:45,215 --> 00:13:47,149 But we got tickets to a show. It's a shame. 254 00:13:47,217 --> 00:13:49,981 This time try and join in and don't sit there like some zombie all night. 255 00:13:50,053 --> 00:13:52,317 Hey, last time I joined in, you got angry with me. 256 00:13:52,389 --> 00:13:55,688 Yeah, 'cause we were discussing the l.M. Pei Museum, not Muhammad Ali. 257 00:13:55,759 --> 00:13:59,092 Well, my mind wandered. I can't keep on those topics. 258 00:13:59,162 --> 00:14:01,962 I just don't want to be the motor power of the Bender Gallery forever. 259 00:14:02,033 --> 00:14:03,967 I want the Amanda Sloane Gallery. 260 00:14:04,035 --> 00:14:07,095 Not Amanda Weinrib, 'cause there's a euphony problem. 262 00:14:11,575 --> 00:14:13,668 - Play 88! - I hope they don't play like this. 263 00:14:13,744 --> 00:14:15,837 - 88! Ten-hut! 264 00:14:15,913 --> 00:14:17,847 What's the matter? You seem down. 265 00:14:17,915 --> 00:14:20,440 - No, I'm fine. - You're fine? 266 00:14:20,518 --> 00:14:22,452 Something's on your mind, Lenny. 267 00:14:22,520 --> 00:14:26,854 Listen, last night I was at one of those dinner parties again. 268 00:14:26,924 --> 00:14:29,290 Amanda-- You know, last week she took me to, 269 00:14:29,360 --> 00:14:31,294 to Le Cirque with the Dorians. 270 00:14:31,362 --> 00:14:35,230 And then last night it was with the Grossbards on Park Avenue. 271 00:14:35,299 --> 00:14:37,928 And then after that, we were driving home... 272 00:14:38,003 --> 00:14:39,937 and I don't know what to say. 273 00:14:40,005 --> 00:14:44,101 It was Saturday night, you know, and we stopped for a light over on Park Avenue. 274 00:14:44,176 --> 00:14:47,873 I looked out the window and I see some guy and this pretty girl. 275 00:14:47,946 --> 00:14:50,710 And, you know, they're walking home and, you know, 276 00:14:50,782 --> 00:14:52,943 the guy's carrying the Sunday papers. 277 00:14:53,018 --> 00:14:56,476 It looked like they were having so much fun, you know. 278 00:14:56,555 --> 00:14:58,989 And, you know-- I don't know, I-- 279 00:14:59,057 --> 00:15:01,254 I remember how great it used to be with me and Amanda... 280 00:15:01,327 --> 00:15:03,018 in our first apartment, you know, how romantic it was. 281 00:15:03,096 --> 00:15:06,263 You know, in those days it was just a kick shopping together... 282 00:15:06,333 --> 00:15:10,235 or, you know, just walking the New York streets, you know. 283 00:15:10,304 --> 00:15:13,273 Then when Max came, everything was so great, you know. 284 00:15:13,340 --> 00:15:15,433 We had such terrific times. 285 00:15:15,509 --> 00:15:20,003 I don't know, it's been so long since there's been, you know, the old passion between us. 286 00:15:20,080 --> 00:15:23,447 I don't know, but it was the first time I had any of those thoughts. 287 00:15:23,517 --> 00:15:26,145 And, you know, they made me feel nervous. 288 00:15:28,856 --> 00:15:31,586 You weren't too pleasant this evening. 289 00:15:31,658 --> 00:15:33,957 Why, 'cause I said no about going to your boss Jerry Bender's house... 290 00:15:34,028 --> 00:15:35,962 - in the Hamptons? - I'll be fine. 291 00:15:36,030 --> 00:15:38,123 I don't like the Hamptons. You know, you used to hate the beach yourself. 292 00:15:38,199 --> 00:15:40,292 Yeah, not the way he lives. It's private and beautiful. 293 00:15:40,368 --> 00:15:42,632 What are you getting so angry about? 294 00:15:42,704 --> 00:15:44,831 - 'Cause you won't come. - Last time we went, I got a tick. 295 00:15:44,906 --> 00:15:47,966 - A tick? Oh, wow. Big deal. - For you, it wasn't a big deal. 296 00:15:48,042 --> 00:15:50,840 - But I took my pants off, I had a black thing living in my leg. - Everyone will be there. 297 00:15:50,912 --> 00:15:52,937 For the potential contacts, I can put up with a few ticks. 298 00:15:53,014 --> 00:15:54,948 I don't-- What contacts? 299 00:15:55,016 --> 00:15:57,041 You know, it's like you're an international spy. 300 00:15:57,118 --> 00:15:59,001 - You got contacts all over town. - I plan to have my own gallery, and soon. 301 00:15:59,021 --> 00:16:01,649 You've changed unbelievably over the years. 302 00:16:01,724 --> 00:16:03,658 - Oh, yeah? You know what, Lenny? - You used to hate that. 303 00:16:03,726 --> 00:16:05,990 - People grow. They grow. Some people. - It's not growth. 304 00:16:06,061 --> 00:16:08,529 You used to hate the beach. And Jerry Bender has got a crush on you. 305 00:16:08,597 --> 00:16:09,030 What? 306 00:16:09,099 --> 00:16:11,033 - This guy stares at you. - Oh, no. That's nuts. 307 00:16:11,101 --> 00:16:13,035 - That's seriously crazy. - He mentally undresses you. 308 00:16:13,103 --> 00:16:15,037 - That's his normal look. - It's not his normal look. 309 00:16:15,105 --> 00:16:17,539 - If he looked at me that way I'd hit him with a brick. - Okay. Okay, let's-- 310 00:16:17,607 --> 00:16:20,269 - Or kiss him on the lips, maybe. - Let's drop this. Please? 311 00:16:26,249 --> 00:16:29,616 Well, what do you mean, you couldn't find it? 312 00:16:29,686 --> 00:16:31,847 Well, I'm sorry. You know, it's dark in here... 313 00:16:31,922 --> 00:16:35,289 and I-- you know, we haven't done it in a while. 314 00:16:35,358 --> 00:16:37,690 - And then you got so angry at me. - I wasn't angry. 315 00:16:37,761 --> 00:16:40,696 I wasn't angry. You were fumbling and I was getting out of the mood. 316 00:16:40,764 --> 00:16:44,131 Sorry, I couldn't find it. This-- We haven't been doing it in a while. 317 00:16:44,201 --> 00:16:46,329 - Okay, let's not get into a whole discussion here. - I lost my sense of direction. 318 00:16:46,404 --> 00:16:48,038 I'm tired. 319 00:16:48,406 --> 00:16:50,636 Every marriage goes through valleys and peaks. 320 00:16:50,708 --> 00:16:53,142 - This is like a valley. - I don't mind going through a valley. 321 00:16:53,211 --> 00:16:56,806 - But I don't want to sink beneath sea level here. - Lenny, why rock the boat? 322 00:16:56,881 --> 00:17:00,146 You got a bright, beautiful wife. You got a kid that you're crazy for. 323 00:17:00,218 --> 00:17:02,152 I'm not gonna rock the boat. Did I tell you about Max? 324 00:17:02,220 --> 00:17:04,984 They want to put him in a special class because he's got a high IQ. 325 00:17:05,056 --> 00:17:07,149 Yeah, well, two bright parents. I mean, what do you expect? 326 00:17:07,225 --> 00:17:09,489 Yeah, whoever they are. I mean, I still don't know. 327 00:17:09,560 --> 00:17:11,528 It's like raising thoroughbreds. 328 00:17:11,596 --> 00:17:13,689 This kid must come from good stock. 329 00:17:13,764 --> 00:17:15,824 He's good-looking; he's got a high IQ; he's got a great personality. 330 00:17:15,901 --> 00:17:17,596 And he's amusing. 331 00:17:17,669 --> 00:17:19,864 This is not my doing. Amanda did the whole adoption. 332 00:17:19,938 --> 00:17:22,099 I just resisted. I complained, like a jerk. 333 00:17:22,174 --> 00:17:26,110 I mean, a good father, a dynamite mother produces a kid like Max. 334 00:17:26,178 --> 00:17:28,612 I think the father's dead, you know. 335 00:17:29,349 --> 00:17:30,944 - The mother? 336 00:17:34,687 --> 00:17:36,621 Don't go any further! 337 00:17:36,689 --> 00:17:38,782 I know what you're thinking, Lenny, and forget it. 338 00:17:38,858 --> 00:17:41,691 How can I forget it? The thought's been put into my head. 339 00:17:41,761 --> 00:17:45,754 Oh, cursed fate. Certain thoughts are better left unthunk. 340 00:17:45,832 --> 00:17:48,323 I'll bet this kid has a dynamite mother. 341 00:17:48,401 --> 00:17:51,131 What makes you think he didn't inherit everything from his father? 342 00:17:51,204 --> 00:17:53,832 Everything? That's very unlikely. But I'm gonna find out. 343 00:17:53,906 --> 00:17:55,136 Let sleeping dogs lie. 344 00:17:55,209 --> 00:17:58,804 - I'll bet she's great. - Curiosity. That's what kills us. 345 00:17:58,879 --> 00:18:02,315 Not muggers or all that bullshit about the ozone layer. It's our own hearts and minds. 346 00:18:02,383 --> 00:18:06,820 - I'm gonna find out. - Please, Lenny, don't be a schmuck. 347 00:18:06,887 --> 00:18:12,052 I remember the adoption vaguely because I'm somewhat friendly with Amanda. 348 00:18:12,126 --> 00:18:14,492 But it was not that long ago that we-- that we did it. 349 00:18:14,561 --> 00:18:17,587 I recall trying to expedite matters for her. 350 00:18:17,665 --> 00:18:22,227 I somehow think it was a single parent with no father. 351 00:18:22,303 --> 00:18:24,830 Right. Exactly. So-So how-- Is it possible for me to get the name-- 352 00:18:24,906 --> 00:18:26,840 I'd like the name of the mother, if I could. 353 00:18:26,908 --> 00:18:28,876 That remains forever in our files. 354 00:18:28,943 --> 00:18:32,902 Even if I have it, I can't give it to you. May I ask why you want to know? 355 00:18:32,981 --> 00:18:34,915 Yes, 'cause I-I-- I'm curious about it... 356 00:18:34,983 --> 00:18:37,451 and I'm trying to get all the information that I can. 357 00:18:37,519 --> 00:18:40,977 - So, so-- - I'm sorry. That's allI can help you with. 358 00:18:41,056 --> 00:18:43,286 There's no possibility of, uh-- 359 00:18:43,358 --> 00:18:46,122 - No, those are the rules. - I don't understand. I'm the father of the child. 360 00:18:46,194 --> 00:18:48,062 - I can't find out who-- - They're very firm. It's never done 361 00:18:49,131 --> 00:18:51,793 - Mm-hmm. - How is the little boy doing? 362 00:18:51,867 --> 00:18:54,131 - Good. He's great. He's fabulous. - Yes? 363 00:18:54,203 --> 00:18:57,297 - Yes. - Say hello to Amanda. 364 00:18:57,373 --> 00:19:00,774 - There's no possibility that I could-- - I'm sorry. 365 00:19:00,843 --> 00:19:04,040 - There's-- - Really sorry. No way. 366 00:19:04,113 --> 00:19:07,139 - Okay, thank you. Thank you. - Bye-bye. 367 00:20:07,547 --> 00:20:09,515 What are you doing, Weinrib? 368 00:20:09,582 --> 00:20:12,142 Don't confuse me! She's coming back in a minute. 369 00:20:12,218 --> 00:20:15,585 - You are breaking the law. - Breaking the law? There's a higher law. 370 00:20:15,655 --> 00:20:18,215 I can find out who my son's mother is. 371 00:20:18,291 --> 00:20:20,384 The judge won't see it that way. 372 00:20:20,460 --> 00:20:22,826 Keep a lookout for me, will you, for Christ's sake? 373 00:20:22,896 --> 00:20:25,956 - Me? I'm the leader of the Chorus. - So what? Look out. 374 00:20:26,032 --> 00:20:27,966 Get your friend Bud to help you. 375 00:20:28,034 --> 00:20:30,559 Bud can't help me. You know, Ellie and Amanda are friendly. 376 00:20:30,637 --> 00:20:33,663 - Bud can't keep a secret. - Why is it a secret? Why can't Amanda know? 377 00:20:33,740 --> 00:20:35,867 What kind of argument am I getting into with you? Amanda-- 378 00:20:35,942 --> 00:20:37,876 'Cause she wouldn't understand. 379 00:20:37,944 --> 00:20:39,003 Oh, you're guilty because you already have exaggerated notions... 380 00:20:39,079 --> 00:20:41,013 about your son's mother. 381 00:20:41,081 --> 00:20:44,448 It's understandable because things are not going smoothly with Amanda. 382 00:20:44,518 --> 00:20:47,180 That's why you will always be a chorus member. 383 00:20:47,254 --> 00:20:49,518 Because you don't do anything. I act. 384 00:20:49,590 --> 00:20:51,785 I take action. I make things happen. 385 00:20:51,859 --> 00:20:54,293 Well, hurry the hell up. I hear footsteps. 386 00:20:58,165 --> 00:21:01,999 I-I forgot my-- I dropped my manila envelope. I didn't realize it. 387 00:21:02,069 --> 00:21:04,537 - Oh. - It has an important interview in it. 388 00:21:04,605 --> 00:21:05,573 With-- With Roberto Duran. 389 00:21:08,977 --> 00:21:12,071 You won't believe this, but he's heading for Pennsylvania. 390 00:21:12,147 --> 00:21:14,138 Of all the human weaknesses, 391 00:21:14,216 --> 00:21:17,118 - obsession is the most dangerous. - And the silliest. 392 00:21:19,955 --> 00:21:22,822 - Yeah? - I'm looking for a former tenant here, 393 00:21:22,891 --> 00:21:25,325 - a-a-a Leslie Wright. - Who are you? 394 00:21:25,393 --> 00:21:27,588 I'm a friend of hers, and I believe she lived here at one time-- 395 00:21:27,662 --> 00:21:29,596 a Leslie Wright? 396 00:21:29,664 --> 00:21:31,928 Oh, yeah, yeah. I remember the girl who used to live here. 397 00:21:32,000 --> 00:21:33,934 - You remember. The pretty one upstairs. - Yeah, yeah, right. 398 00:21:34,002 --> 00:21:36,402 She was only here for a while. Who are you? 399 00:21:36,471 --> 00:21:38,065 Uh, I'm just an old friend of hers and I was trying to track her down. 400 00:21:38,140 --> 00:21:39,165 Do you know-- Do you know where I could find her? 401 00:21:39,243 --> 00:21:42,178 Leslie Wailes was her name, not Leslie Wright. Leslie Wailes. 402 00:21:42,246 --> 00:21:44,180 - Leslie Wailes? - Wailes. 403 00:21:44,248 --> 00:21:46,682 - She moved to New York. - You sure? 'Cause I have Leslie Wright. 404 00:21:46,750 --> 00:21:49,275 Leslie-- Leslie-- Did she get married or-- 405 00:21:49,353 --> 00:21:51,378 I don't know. 406 00:21:51,455 --> 00:21:54,424 You have no other information? You don't know where I could find her or anything? 407 00:21:54,491 --> 00:21:56,925 No. She was only here for a little while. I told you. 408 00:21:56,994 --> 00:21:59,326 Look, let me give you my phone number. 409 00:21:59,396 --> 00:22:02,331 If anything turns up, I would love to locate her. 410 00:22:06,203 --> 00:22:09,195 - Here. Give me that. I'll take that. - Thank you. 411 00:22:09,273 --> 00:22:10,798 - Yeah. Okay. - You're welcome. 412 00:22:12,477 --> 00:22:15,810 You have a phone call. Mr. Lamont. Says he's from Philadelphia. 413 00:22:15,880 --> 00:22:17,814 - Oh. - You gave him your number? 414 00:22:17,882 --> 00:22:20,646 - Mm-hmm. - Is this Lenny Weinrib? 415 00:22:20,718 --> 00:22:22,652 - Go ahead, sir. - Hello. 416 00:22:22,720 --> 00:22:26,053 Yeah, this is Bill Lamont. Um, that woman you were looking for-- 417 00:22:26,124 --> 00:22:29,719 We asked another guy who said her name was Leslie St. James. 418 00:22:29,794 --> 00:22:32,922 Said she moved to New York City, talked about becoming an actress. 419 00:22:32,997 --> 00:22:35,431 - Leslie St. James? - Yes, sir. Yeah. 420 00:22:35,500 --> 00:22:40,301 He remembered her quite well. Leslie St. James is the name she took. 421 00:22:40,371 --> 00:22:45,832 There was a Leslie St. James who was a member of the Screen Extras Guild. 422 00:22:45,910 --> 00:22:47,071 - So that's that. - So what are you telling me? 423 00:22:47,146 --> 00:22:50,912 That-- That she was a movie extra or stage extra? 424 00:22:50,983 --> 00:22:53,110 Yeah. That's all I have. 425 00:22:53,185 --> 00:22:55,244 So-- And there's an address, but, uh, you know, 426 00:22:55,321 --> 00:22:58,757 this book's a few years old. So. 427 00:22:58,824 --> 00:23:01,019 I'm looking for a-- it's-- she-- 428 00:23:01,093 --> 00:23:03,891 A Leslie St. James or maybe it's a Leslie Wailes. 429 00:23:03,963 --> 00:23:06,397 - I don't know, but I think she lived here. - Oh, yeah, sure. I remember. 430 00:23:06,465 --> 00:23:08,866 She was a tall girl. She changed her name to Linda Ash. 431 00:23:08,935 --> 00:23:10,368 Linda Ash? 432 00:23:10,437 --> 00:23:12,928 Yeah, it was a fake name. She-- She did sex movies. 433 00:23:13,006 --> 00:23:15,566 - Sex movies? - Yeah, you know, like, uh, Deep Throat. 434 00:23:15,642 --> 00:23:17,941 Skin flicks. Tall, blonde, hot. 435 00:23:18,012 --> 00:23:19,946 - Very hot. - Really? Good-looking? 436 00:23:20,014 --> 00:23:22,448 Oh, great looking. Tremendous body. 437 00:23:22,516 --> 00:23:24,950 - How you doin'? - Hey, Lenny, how are ya? 438 00:23:25,019 --> 00:23:27,647 - Good. Can I talk to you a minute? - Yeah. 439 00:23:27,722 --> 00:23:31,214 - I need a favor. - You got it. What? 440 00:23:31,292 --> 00:23:34,750 You got friends in the, uh, the adult film business, right? 441 00:23:34,829 --> 00:23:36,820 My nephew knows them all. Why? 442 00:23:36,897 --> 00:23:41,664 I'm trying to locate an actress named Linda Ash. 443 00:23:41,736 --> 00:23:44,330 - You know which movies she did? - No. 444 00:23:44,405 --> 00:23:46,498 I was in the video store trying to get a video, 445 00:23:46,574 --> 00:23:48,667 but, you know, I get embarrassed because my neighbor saw me there. 446 00:23:48,743 --> 00:23:51,007 - And, you know-- - I hear ya. 447 00:23:51,078 --> 00:23:53,171 - Well, let me get back to you on that one. All right? - Yeah. 448 00:23:55,517 --> 00:23:57,610 You know, I don't know why we have to do this. 449 00:23:57,686 --> 00:23:59,677 I-I don't want to spend the whole weekend at Jerry Bender's. 450 00:23:59,755 --> 00:24:01,655 Oh, Lenny, please. We've been through this. 451 00:24:01,723 --> 00:24:03,385 There are lots of important clients there. 452 00:24:03,459 --> 00:24:05,393 I-- You know, so what is this? 453 00:24:05,461 --> 00:24:08,794 Meanwhile this guy's going to stare at you the whole weekend and mentally undress you. 454 00:24:08,865 --> 00:24:10,799 He is not. He's not. 455 00:24:10,867 --> 00:24:14,303 God, your paranoia is rivaled in history only by Joseph Stalin. 456 00:24:27,718 --> 00:24:30,152 I'm really glad you could make it out this weekend, Amanda. 457 00:24:30,220 --> 00:24:32,711 There's some people around here I think it's very important you should meet. 458 00:24:32,790 --> 00:24:35,123 Oh, thanks, Jerry. I really appreciate it. I really do. 459 00:24:35,193 --> 00:24:38,718 - God, I love your sailboat. - Yeah, it's fun, isn't it? 460 00:24:38,796 --> 00:24:40,963 - Yeah. - Sorry the waves were so choppy, Lenny. 461 00:24:41,732 --> 00:24:45,168 Oh, it's no problem. I don't mind throwing up into the wind, you know. 462 00:24:45,235 --> 00:24:47,635 You know, we could see that house next door at 3:00. 463 00:24:47,705 --> 00:24:49,639 By the way, it's a great buy. 464 00:24:49,707 --> 00:24:51,834 Is it possible that I could just make one quick phone call? 465 00:24:51,909 --> 00:24:53,843 - Yeah. Ken! - Yes, Jerry. 466 00:24:53,911 --> 00:24:55,175 Oh, sorry, Ken. Can you show Lenny the private phone? 467 00:24:55,246 --> 00:24:57,339 Sure. Come on, Lenny. It's right over here. 468 00:24:57,415 --> 00:25:00,213 The house sounds exciting. What are they asking again? 469 00:25:00,285 --> 00:25:04,688 Amanda, listen. Why don't you, uh, spend the night here tonight. 470 00:25:04,756 --> 00:25:07,122 - What do you say? Are you free tonight? - Uh-- 471 00:25:07,192 --> 00:25:09,126 We could go for a sail. 472 00:25:09,194 --> 00:25:12,129 You can't believe what the stars look like lying on the back of a boat. 473 00:25:12,197 --> 00:25:15,132 - Yeah. No, I'd love to. I really would love to. - Well, then, do it. 474 00:25:15,200 --> 00:25:18,067 But I-- No, he has to get back. 475 00:25:18,136 --> 00:25:20,730 Really? 476 00:25:20,805 --> 00:25:23,603 - Yeah. - Hmm. 477 00:25:23,675 --> 00:25:25,609 Hmm. 478 00:25:27,446 --> 00:25:30,074 I got the skinny on Linda Ash. 479 00:25:30,149 --> 00:25:33,607 She's been in a few films. She's no star or nothin'. 480 00:25:33,686 --> 00:25:35,984 That's why you never heard of her. 481 00:25:35,055 --> 00:25:38,491 She works under the stage name "Judy Cum." 482 00:25:38,558 --> 00:25:40,890 Mostly, she's a hooker. 483 00:25:40,961 --> 00:25:43,088 Uh, I got her number. 484 00:25:45,899 --> 00:25:47,833 Judy Cum? 485 00:25:47,901 --> 00:25:49,835 Oh, you never should have looked for her. 486 00:25:49,903 --> 00:25:52,064 Now I see big trouble. 487 00:25:52,139 --> 00:25:55,540 Oh, for God's sake. You know, you're such a Cassandra. 488 00:25:55,609 --> 00:25:58,442 I'm not such a Cassandra. I am Cassandra. 489 00:25:58,512 --> 00:26:01,003 - That's who I am. - I gotta check this thing out. 490 00:26:01,081 --> 00:26:04,141 You'll be sorry. I'm telling you, quit now. 491 00:26:04,217 --> 00:26:07,778 Oh, and don't let Amanda talk you into buying the house next door. 492 00:26:07,854 --> 00:26:10,221 - This place? - Yes! I see big problems with beach erosion... 493 00:26:10,291 --> 00:26:12,225 and a heavy mortgage. 494 00:26:14,228 --> 00:26:17,459 Well, I love that property. 495 00:26:17,532 --> 00:26:20,126 - Mm-hmm. - We're right near everybody. 496 00:26:20,201 --> 00:26:23,432 Doesn't mean we have to see them all the time, but we have the option. 497 00:26:23,504 --> 00:26:25,870 You-- You're not afraid of beach erosion, right? 498 00:26:25,940 --> 00:26:29,637 Beach erosion? Oh, come on, now. You're such a Cassandra. 499 00:26:29,710 --> 00:26:31,644 You gonna take a shower? 500 00:26:31,712 --> 00:26:34,272 Yeah. Yeah, can you, uh, fix something for dinner? 501 00:26:34,348 --> 00:26:36,282 Yeah, I'll make dinner. 502 00:26:36,350 --> 00:26:38,477 I'll make the spaghetti, okay? 503 00:26:38,553 --> 00:26:40,783 There's some sauce in the fridge. 504 00:27:08,418 --> 00:27:10,750 Hello, is this Linda? 505 00:27:10,820 --> 00:27:14,119 Linda, um, this is Lenny. 506 00:27:14,190 --> 00:27:17,819 Uh, I-- I got your number from Charlie Biggs. 507 00:27:17,894 --> 00:27:21,125 And I wonder if, uh, it would be possible... 508 00:27:21,197 --> 00:27:23,132 that you would have some time tomorrow afternoon. 509 00:27:23,200 --> 00:27:25,794 - You shouldn't do this. - Would you please stop it? 510 00:27:25,870 --> 00:27:28,703 - You're gonna cheat on Amanda? - I'm not cheating. 511 00:27:28,772 --> 00:27:30,797 -I just want to see what she looks like. -You can get a disease. 512 00:27:30,875 --> 00:27:32,571 - Aren't you scared of AIDS? - I'm not gonna sleep with the girl. 513 00:27:32,644 --> 00:27:34,578 I just want to see what she looks like. 514 00:27:34,646 --> 00:27:37,206 I want to get to know her or something. It's just-- 515 00:27:37,282 --> 00:27:40,445 Uh, is it possible that we could meet at a hotel? 516 00:27:40,518 --> 00:27:43,248 You're gonna rent a hotel room with a hooker and not sleep with her? 517 00:27:43,321 --> 00:27:45,380 Leave me alone. I want to talk to her. 518 00:27:45,457 --> 00:27:47,891 How about the Plaza on 59th Street? Is that-- 519 00:27:47,959 --> 00:27:51,895 What are you doing? At least pick an out-of-the-way spot. 520 00:27:51,963 --> 00:27:53,897 Oh, Christ. 521 00:27:53,965 --> 00:27:56,661 Um, Linda, maybe it'd be better if I-- 522 00:27:56,735 --> 00:27:59,704 What about your place? Would that be a possibility? 523 00:27:59,771 --> 00:28:02,706 - Uh-huh. Uh-- 524 00:28:02,774 --> 00:28:04,708 Hold on one second. 525 00:28:04,877 --> 00:28:06,011 3:00. 526 00:28:11,684 --> 00:28:14,778 Okay. Um, I'll be there. 527 00:28:14,854 --> 00:28:16,788 And it's Lenny. 528 00:28:18,324 --> 00:28:22,956 Uh, Lenny... Gildersleeve. Okay. 529 00:28:23,030 --> 00:28:26,467 I can't believe this. I can't believe it. 530 00:28:45,786 --> 00:28:48,914 Hi. Are you my 3:00? 531 00:28:52,560 --> 00:28:54,994 - Linda Ash? - Yeah, that's right. 532 00:28:57,131 --> 00:28:59,895 - I'm Lenny. - Hello, Lenny. Come on in. 533 00:28:59,968 --> 00:29:01,903 - Uh, you're-- you're Linda Ash, right? - Yeah. 534 00:29:01,971 --> 00:29:04,030 - 'Cause we spoke on the phone? - Yeah. 535 00:29:04,106 --> 00:29:06,438 Are you okay? You look all white. 536 00:29:07,508 --> 00:29:09,635 - I'm okay. - Yeah? 537 00:29:09,711 --> 00:29:12,680 - Do you want something to drink? 538 00:29:12,747 --> 00:29:15,181 - Maybe-- Do you have a little Perrier or something? - What? 539 00:29:15,249 --> 00:29:18,514 - Little-- Just a little tap water? - Oh, sure. I have that. 540 00:29:18,586 --> 00:29:20,521 - You're definitely Linda Ash? - Yeah. 541 00:29:20,589 --> 00:29:23,183 What's the matter? Are you a stroke victim or something? 542 00:29:23,258 --> 00:29:25,522 I told you three times. I'm Linda Ash. 543 00:29:25,594 --> 00:29:27,528 Oh. 544 00:29:29,365 --> 00:29:32,698 Oh, you have a, a beautiful apartment. 545 00:29:31,768 --> 00:29:35,329 - Oh, thank you. I did it myself. - Oh. 546 00:29:35,405 --> 00:29:38,806 Oh, let me show you something I just got. 547 00:29:38,875 --> 00:29:40,809 - That. Isn't it a pisser? - Ohh! 548 00:29:40,877 --> 00:29:43,004 Oh, yes, it's-- it's magnificent. 549 00:29:43,079 --> 00:29:45,479 Oh. Well, yeah. I got a great sense of humor. 550 00:29:45,548 --> 00:29:48,711 That's something you're going to find out about me-- I'm funny and I can take a joke. 551 00:29:48,785 --> 00:29:50,583 - A lot of people can't take a joke. - Oh, no, I can. 552 00:29:50,654 --> 00:29:52,588 - They say that about me too. - Oh, yeah? 553 00:29:52,656 --> 00:29:54,590 - That I have a good sense of humor. - Oh, good! 554 00:29:54,658 --> 00:29:57,491 Then you'll like this. Look, I just got this. Somebody gave it to me. 555 00:29:57,561 --> 00:30:01,497 As the main spring goes back and forth, the bishop keeps fucking her in the ass. 556 00:30:01,565 --> 00:30:04,830 - It's a genuine antique and it keeps perfect time. - Oh, my goodness. 557 00:30:04,902 --> 00:30:07,336 It's a disgusting-- Ohh. 558 00:30:07,405 --> 00:30:09,396 - Lenny? 559 00:30:09,473 --> 00:30:12,704 The water today is a little bit brown. Would you like some Sprite instead? 560 00:30:12,777 --> 00:30:15,245 - I'm feeling a little dizzy. I-- - Oh, no! 561 00:30:15,312 --> 00:30:17,337 - Come sit down. - No, no. I don't know why. 562 00:30:17,415 --> 00:30:19,906 Usually, you know, I'm just the picture of health. 563 00:30:19,984 --> 00:30:23,010 - Yeah? You work out? - Not-- Not religiously. 564 00:30:23,087 --> 00:30:26,488 Oh, I'm not religious either. Mostly, my folks were Episcopalian. 565 00:30:26,557 --> 00:30:28,021 - Oh, are they? So-- - So. 566 00:30:28,093 --> 00:30:31,021 So what do you do, Lenny? Oh, no. Wait. Let me guess. 567 00:30:31,096 --> 00:30:33,690 I have a great knack for guessing what people do for a living. 568 00:30:33,765 --> 00:30:36,393 - Um-- - Um, uh-- I'll tell you the truth. 569 00:30:36,468 --> 00:30:38,459 - Rug salesman! - You're close. 570 00:30:38,537 --> 00:30:40,835 I'm-- I'm a sportswriter. Because-- 571 00:30:40,906 --> 00:30:42,840 - Shit. I wasn't even in the ballpark. - Well, it was not-- 572 00:30:42,908 --> 00:30:45,809 Wait. Ballpark. Sportswriter. Get it? 573 00:30:45,877 --> 00:30:47,141 - I get it. 574 00:30:47,213 --> 00:30:50,307 I did it with a wrestler once. A huge, hairy guy. 575 00:30:50,383 --> 00:30:53,614 You'd figure he'd be hung like a horse, but there was very little there. 576 00:30:53,686 --> 00:30:55,984 Look, could I-- could I just get a little water? 577 00:30:56,055 --> 00:30:58,148 - I don't care if it's brown. - Oh, I'm sorry. 578 00:30:58,224 --> 00:31:01,057 I don't mind rust. I'm just feeling a little-- 579 00:31:01,127 --> 00:31:04,153 T-Tell me, Linda. 580 00:31:04,230 --> 00:31:06,926 Uh, uh, tell me about yourself, Linda. 581 00:31:06,999 --> 00:31:09,433 Well, what do you-- what do you want to know? 582 00:31:09,502 --> 00:31:11,164 Anything. I just want to know about you. 583 00:31:11,238 --> 00:31:14,105 - Well, basically, Lenny, - Yes? 584 00:31:14,174 --> 00:31:16,665 - I'm an actress. - Oh, that's wonderful. 585 00:31:16,743 --> 00:31:18,768 I like drama. I study. 586 00:31:18,846 --> 00:31:20,780 Yes? Uh, where-- where's that? 587 00:31:20,848 --> 00:31:23,339 Paul Delucca. Have you ever heard of him? 588 00:31:23,417 --> 00:31:25,681 - Paul Delucca? No. But then, I wouldn't. - Yeah. 589 00:31:25,752 --> 00:31:29,017 - Oh, he's really well-known. He's a genius. - I'm sure. I'm sure. 590 00:31:29,089 --> 00:31:31,252 He says he thinks I'm gonna make it big. 591 00:31:31,326 --> 00:31:33,260 - Mmm. - Um, I know you will. 592 00:31:33,328 --> 00:31:36,593 - Yeah. Maybe you've seen some of my movies. - That's possible. 593 00:31:36,664 --> 00:31:39,132 Did you ever see The Enchanted Pussy? 594 00:31:39,200 --> 00:31:41,964 Not yet, but I-I-- It's on my list of must-see. 595 00:31:42,036 --> 00:31:43,970 Oh, they're videotapes, so you can rent it. 596 00:31:44,038 --> 00:31:46,802 But my real ambition is to be on Broadway in a musical. 597 00:31:46,875 --> 00:31:48,809 - I sing. - Do you? 598 00:31:48,877 --> 00:31:50,811 - Excuse me. 599 00:31:52,882 --> 00:31:58,149 Hello? Busy. Some of them are called John, all right? 600 00:32:01,557 --> 00:32:02,921 - Was that-- Was that your husband? - Ha-ha. Very funny. 601 00:32:03,393 --> 00:32:05,827 No, but I mean, you have no husband, no family, no children... 602 00:32:05,896 --> 00:32:08,490 or anything like that? 603 00:32:08,565 --> 00:32:11,466 'Cause some do. You have a funny look on your face. 604 00:32:11,535 --> 00:32:13,469 - Um. - Did I say the wrong thing? 605 00:32:13,537 --> 00:32:15,732 - No. Not really. - I-- I said-- 606 00:32:15,805 --> 00:32:18,035 No. No, listen 607 00:32:18,108 --> 00:32:20,736 - What are you in the mood for, Len? - Me? I-I, well, 608 00:32:20,810 --> 00:32:22,005 I would like to-- You know, we can chat for a while. 609 00:32:22,079 --> 00:32:24,240 I thought I'd get into it slowly and, you know-- 610 00:32:24,315 --> 00:32:26,579 You're married, aren't you? 611 00:32:26,651 --> 00:32:29,552 - How can you tell that? - 'Cause you got that look. 612 00:32:29,620 --> 00:32:31,554 That look? Wh-What look is that? 613 00:32:31,622 --> 00:32:34,648 That look like it's been a long time since you've had a great blow job. 614 00:32:34,725 --> 00:32:38,422 Oh, that look. I-- I can understand. 615 00:32:38,496 --> 00:32:41,761 - Wh-Where are you from? - Mm, around. 616 00:32:41,832 --> 00:32:44,130 What are you so interested in me for? 617 00:32:44,202 --> 00:32:46,636 - That's my fingers. - Yes, I know. 618 00:32:46,704 --> 00:32:48,638 - Here. - What-- 619 00:32:48,706 --> 00:32:50,640 Pull, pull! Pull the strings. 620 00:32:50,708 --> 00:32:53,199 - Pull these strings? - Yeah, pull all the strings. See? See what happens? 621 00:32:53,277 --> 00:32:55,871 - I'm not so mechanical as I was. - Oh, it's easy. Here. Pull. 622 00:32:55,947 --> 00:32:58,882 - Ahh! See, it opens! - Ohh! 623 00:32:58,950 --> 00:33:00,111 That's amazing. Science is-- is-- 624 00:33:00,185 --> 00:33:02,915 - Yeah. - You, you, you-- I-I-- 625 00:33:02,988 --> 00:33:05,980 Oh. Really. Well. 626 00:33:06,058 --> 00:33:09,994 Uh, you're a very attractive woman, a very beautiful young woman. 627 00:33:10,062 --> 00:33:11,996 Oh, thank you, Lenny. 628 00:33:12,064 --> 00:33:14,999 Well, you're cute too. So, what do you say? 629 00:33:15,067 --> 00:33:17,433 - You wanna go inside, take a shower? - A shower? 630 00:33:17,502 --> 00:33:20,164 -You can study me up close and personal. -Oh! Oh. 631 00:33:20,239 --> 00:33:22,673 No, see, I bathed already. 632 00:33:22,741 --> 00:33:24,675 - You got lipstick on my fi-- 633 00:33:24,743 --> 00:33:26,973 - Mmm, you smell clean. Mmm. - Thank you. Well-- 634 00:33:27,045 --> 00:33:30,503 As I say, I'm basically-- My ear. 635 00:33:30,582 --> 00:33:33,016 - You're sensitive, huh? - It's my weak spot, in my ear. 636 00:33:33,085 --> 00:33:35,610 - Oh. Okay. 637 00:33:35,687 --> 00:33:38,383 A little nibbling makes me... go crazy. 638 00:33:38,457 --> 00:33:40,721 Okay, Len. Are you nervous? 639 00:33:40,792 --> 00:33:43,852 I-- No. But yes, I am nervous, to tell you the truth. 640 00:33:43,929 --> 00:33:46,625 - You do look that way. - I've never-- I-I've never done this, actually. 641 00:33:46,698 --> 00:33:48,360 - Oh, okay. That's all right. I'll take it slow. - This is-- I-I-- 642 00:33:48,434 --> 00:33:50,368 Oh. Okay. I-- 643 00:33:50,436 --> 00:33:52,563 Um, incidentally, Len, 644 00:33:52,639 --> 00:33:54,631 I think I should tell you ahead of time I-I get 200 dollars. 645 00:33:54,662 --> 00:33:56,873 It's no problem. No problem. 646 00:33:56,873 --> 00:33:59,375 - Just a-- Just a show of good faith. - Thanks, Lenny. Wow! 647 00:33:59,459 --> 00:34:01,377 You're really sweet, Len. 648 00:34:01,461 --> 00:34:03,588 Put it down as a religious contribution. 649 00:34:03,588 --> 00:34:06,966 No, but seriously, you want to know why I liked you right from the start? 650 00:34:07,091 --> 00:34:09,470 - Why? - 'Cause I'm always attracted to losers. 651 00:34:09,595 --> 00:34:11,680 Losers? You think I'm a loser? 652 00:34:11,764 --> 00:34:13,891 Yeah. You got no confidence. 653 00:34:14,062 --> 00:34:15,996 It's sweet. I like that in a man. 654 00:34:16,064 --> 00:34:19,659 I can't stand those johns who come here and throw down a couple of hundred... 655 00:34:19,734 --> 00:34:22,362 and whip out a big dick and wave it all over the joint. 656 00:34:22,437 --> 00:34:26,168 Oh, I-- I wouldn't do that even if I wanted to because I'll just-- 657 00:34:26,241 --> 00:34:28,903 - Ah, shit! 658 00:34:28,977 --> 00:34:31,946 Hello. Oh, hello, Angela. 659 00:34:32,013 --> 00:34:36,109 Oh! Oh, wow! Ha-ha! 660 00:34:36,184 --> 00:34:39,381 Oh, God, thank you for thinking of me. 661 00:34:39,454 --> 00:34:40,388 Yeah, that's great. 662 00:34:40,456 --> 00:34:44,119 Okay. Yeah, well, I'll see you at 10:00. 663 00:34:44,193 --> 00:34:46,286 Bye. 664 00:34:46,362 --> 00:34:49,627 I just got a small part in an Angela Dawson movie. 665 00:34:49,699 --> 00:34:52,133 I get to do it with her! 666 00:34:54,203 --> 00:34:56,137 I don't understand you. 667 00:34:56,205 --> 00:34:58,799 If you're-- If you're serious about being a Broadway actress, 668 00:34:58,874 --> 00:35:00,138 what are you wasting your time with all this porn for? 669 00:35:00,210 --> 00:35:02,644 What's it to you? It's good experience. 670 00:35:02,713 --> 00:35:05,648 How? Making it with a woman in front of the camera is good experience? 671 00:35:05,716 --> 00:35:08,150 That's gonna get you closer to be a Broadway star? 672 00:35:08,218 --> 00:35:10,652 - What are you getting all mad for? - I'm not mad. 673 00:35:10,721 --> 00:35:13,747 I just think it's crazy. You're an attractive young woman. 674 00:35:13,824 --> 00:35:16,258 You know, what are you-- You don't have to live like this, Linda. 675 00:35:16,326 --> 00:35:18,260 - What are you, my pastor? - This is crazy! 676 00:35:18,328 --> 00:35:20,990 You take money from guys and you perform all these acts. 677 00:35:21,064 --> 00:35:23,658 You know, you could be-- Hey, I'm talking to you. 678 00:35:23,734 --> 00:35:26,066 - You could have a family. - Hey, let go of me! 679 00:35:26,136 --> 00:35:28,594 - You could have a husband and a child or something. - All right. No. Hey! 680 00:35:28,673 --> 00:35:30,800 Stop. Stop it now! Stop! 681 00:35:30,875 --> 00:35:33,309 - Listen. I don't like possessive men. - I'm not possessive. 682 00:35:33,378 --> 00:35:35,608 You come in here, you don't want to do anything with me. You're telling me what to do. 683 00:35:35,680 --> 00:35:37,614 - I want to talk. - Do you want to do it or not? 684 00:35:37,682 --> 00:35:39,946 - I want to talk. I paid you, I want to talk. - Oh, no. Okay. 685 00:35:40,017 --> 00:35:41,951 - I bought the time. - Then you get your money back. 686 00:35:42,019 --> 00:35:44,112 - I'm giving it back. Refund. - No, keep the money. 687 00:35:44,188 --> 00:35:46,122 - Let's go. No. - I bought the time! 688 00:35:46,190 --> 00:35:48,489 - Hey, stop it. No, I'm giving it back and you're leaving. - Why can't I talk? 689 00:35:48,560 --> 00:35:50,494 - Get out! 690 00:36:00,572 --> 00:36:03,803 Daddy, why are you staring at me like that? 691 00:36:03,876 --> 00:36:05,969 Come here. 692 00:36:06,044 --> 00:36:08,035 You know why I'm staring at you? 693 00:36:08,113 --> 00:36:10,638 I'm staring at you 'cause I can't believe it. 694 00:36:10,716 --> 00:36:13,150 Because you're so bright and you're such a great kid. 695 00:36:13,218 --> 00:36:15,914 Come on, Max. Now it's time for bed. 696 00:36:15,988 --> 00:36:17,287 Come on. Okay. Time for beddums. 697 00:36:18,358 --> 00:36:20,020 - Ready? The kid's getting heavy. 698 00:36:20,094 --> 00:36:23,086 - He can walk, you know. - Yeah. Okay. Can you walk? 699 00:36:23,164 --> 00:36:26,065 Poor Weinrib! Turn back. 700 00:36:26,133 --> 00:36:29,899 Don't meddle any further. Accept the truth. 701 00:36:29,970 --> 00:36:32,871 I see disaster. I see catastrophe. 702 00:36:32,940 --> 00:36:35,602 Worse, I see lawyers. 703 00:36:35,676 --> 00:36:38,110 But wait, a messenger. 704 00:36:39,613 --> 00:36:42,309 I come from the midtown area where Lenny Weinrib, 705 00:36:42,383 --> 00:36:45,045 tortured by passions too overwhelming to regulate, 706 00:36:45,119 --> 00:36:47,587 did indeed call this little hustler on the phone... 707 00:36:47,655 --> 00:36:50,180 in earnest attempt to see her again. 708 00:36:50,257 --> 00:36:52,384 At first he wrestled with his drives, 709 00:36:52,460 --> 00:36:54,094 trying to master a curiosity... 710 00:36:54,162 --> 00:36:57,829 not slaked by this initial meeting, but only whetted by it. 711 00:36:57,898 --> 00:37:02,562 His thirst to know this woman more did inexorably provoke him to call her. 712 00:37:02,636 --> 00:37:05,501 Nervous and confused, at first he only got her answering machine. 713 00:37:05,573 --> 00:37:09,170 Then, at fifth try, she picked up the phone herself. 714 00:37:09,243 --> 00:37:12,509 Painful to relate that she thought he was nuts and did not want to meet him nohow. 715 00:37:12,581 --> 00:37:16,278 "Stop bothering me, creep," was her cutting declaration. 716 00:37:16,351 --> 00:37:18,478 Then she used the "F" word. 717 00:37:18,553 --> 00:37:21,080 Agonized, he called again, offering her abundant financial compensation... 718 00:37:21,157 --> 00:37:23,318 just for a brief chat. 719 00:37:23,392 --> 00:37:26,555 But she bade him get off her back and slammed the phone down. 720 00:37:26,629 --> 00:37:30,656 Finally, in doldrums mixed with much anxiety, 721 00:37:30,733 --> 00:37:32,667 he stood watch outside her apartment... 722 00:37:32,735 --> 00:37:37,172 and waited until such a time as he did spot her heading for the laundromat. 723 00:37:46,949 --> 00:37:48,679 - Oh, my God! - Okay, don't get upset or anything. 724 00:37:48,752 --> 00:37:50,777 - I just thought we could have lunch. - Why me? 725 00:37:50,854 --> 00:37:53,516 - I'll pay for your time. I just want to speak to you. - All right! 726 00:37:53,590 --> 00:37:56,025 What are you, some kind of fucking pervert who-- 727 00:37:56,193 --> 00:37:59,357 Leave me alone. I'm not-- I'm not one of those psychopaths... 728 00:37:59,429 --> 00:38:01,363 that kills prostitutes, I promise you. 729 00:38:01,431 --> 00:38:04,764 - Why would you ever say something like that? - I'm joking. I'm joking. 730 00:38:04,835 --> 00:38:07,965 Listen, in my work, I have to keep an eye out for strange individuals. 731 00:38:08,039 --> 00:38:10,132 - Okay. - I knew a girl that got killed. 732 00:38:10,208 --> 00:38:12,472 All right. Hey, I got you some flowers. Here. 733 00:38:12,544 --> 00:38:15,479 I got you some flowers. Let's have lunch. I'll pay for it. 734 00:38:15,547 --> 00:38:19,005 I'll pay for your time. I just wanna talk to you. 735 00:38:20,218 --> 00:38:22,914 So then my mother married my third father. 736 00:38:22,987 --> 00:38:25,387 I mean, I don't know if she married him, but he moved in. 737 00:38:25,456 --> 00:38:28,152 We didn't get along. He was a disgusting drunk. 738 00:38:28,226 --> 00:38:31,320 What about your hereditary father? Your actual, actual-- 739 00:38:31,396 --> 00:38:34,093 Oh, he was a drug pusher and he was also a car thief. 740 00:38:34,166 --> 00:38:37,294 He picked pockets and, you know, he burgled and stuff. 741 00:38:37,369 --> 00:38:40,827 - And he was an epileptic. - Uh-huh. You haven't left anything out, right? 742 00:38:40,906 --> 00:38:43,670 - Mail fraud! - Oh, mail fraud. Oh, okay, yeah. 743 00:38:43,742 --> 00:38:45,676 - That's what they caught him on. - Uh-huh. 744 00:38:45,744 --> 00:38:48,178 Hey, you got an appetite like a lumberjack. 745 00:38:48,247 --> 00:38:50,181 Oh. Well, thank you. 746 00:38:50,249 --> 00:38:52,183 Oh, it's fine. Eat all you want. 747 00:38:52,251 --> 00:38:55,415 I'm very hungry, actually. Um, so then I ran away when I was 14. 748 00:38:55,488 --> 00:38:56,921 Mm-hmm. 749 00:38:56,990 --> 00:38:59,550 And I went away with this musician named Johnny. 750 00:38:59,626 --> 00:39:02,527 And it was terrible because we fought all the time, Lenny. 751 00:39:02,596 --> 00:39:04,860 Finally, he committed suicide. 752 00:39:04,931 --> 00:39:07,195 And for years I thought it was because of my cooking. 753 00:39:07,267 --> 00:39:09,201 He always hated my clam sauce. 754 00:39:09,269 --> 00:39:11,864 And so then I kicked around from Chicago, Philadelphia, you know. 755 00:39:11,939 --> 00:39:13,873 All over the place. And I ended up here. 756 00:39:13,941 --> 00:39:16,205 You never thought of just getting a regular job? 757 00:39:16,277 --> 00:39:18,268 Oh, yeah. Sure, I did. No, I did things. 758 00:39:18,346 --> 00:39:22,214 I waited on tables. I worked in a massage parlor. I did phone sex. 759 00:39:22,283 --> 00:39:25,650 Now and then I would, you know, turn a few tricks in order to make some dough. 760 00:39:25,720 --> 00:39:29,383 And one day my friend Susie calls me and she asks me if I want to be in a film. 761 00:39:29,457 --> 00:39:32,153 Something called Snatch Happy. And I said, "Sure." 762 00:39:32,226 --> 00:39:34,888 And I remember I was very nervous... 763 00:39:34,962 --> 00:39:37,295 because I'd never done it in front of people with a camera before, you know. 764 00:39:37,366 --> 00:39:40,426 And so there I am on the first day, on the set. 765 00:39:40,502 --> 00:39:43,164 And there's this guy fucking me from behind, right? 766 00:39:43,238 --> 00:39:46,901 And there's these two huge guys dressed like cops in my mouth at the same time. 767 00:39:46,975 --> 00:39:49,170 And I remember thinking to myself, 768 00:39:49,244 --> 00:39:52,077 "I like acting. I wanna study." 769 00:39:53,148 --> 00:39:56,345 Yes, well. It's a-- It's a-- 770 00:39:56,418 --> 00:39:59,444 That's one way of getting into the profession. 771 00:39:59,521 --> 00:40:01,512 Um, tell me about your family a little bit. 772 00:40:01,590 --> 00:40:03,081 What? I told you already. You could write a book by now. 773 00:40:03,159 --> 00:40:05,184 But, but were there any unusual members? 774 00:40:05,261 --> 00:40:08,526 - Very bright ones or brilliant or talented or something. - Mmm! Yes! 775 00:40:08,598 --> 00:40:10,532 - I'm sorry. There was. - Mmm. 776 00:40:10,600 --> 00:40:12,693 My father's brother was supposed to be a genius. 777 00:40:12,769 --> 00:40:14,862 I never met him, but everybody said he was brilliant. 778 00:40:14,937 --> 00:40:18,634 - Really? What did he do? - He was a serial rapist. He spent his whole life in jail. 779 00:40:18,708 --> 00:40:20,643 But if he had gone straight, he might have been very good in math. 780 00:40:20,711 --> 00:40:22,804 - Good in math. Well, that's-- - Yeah. 781 00:40:22,880 --> 00:40:24,814 I think I got my intelligence from him, 782 00:40:24,882 --> 00:40:27,146 because everybody else in the family is all slugs and lowlifes. 783 00:40:27,217 --> 00:40:29,651 - I'm the only one with any ambition. - Are you? 784 00:40:29,720 --> 00:40:32,154 And you never-- never had a drive to get married? 785 00:40:32,222 --> 00:40:34,156 What for? They're all assholes. 786 00:40:34,224 --> 00:40:36,158 One of them used to beat me up. 787 00:40:36,226 --> 00:40:39,161 Another one used to fuck my best friend when I wasn't looking. 788 00:40:39,229 --> 00:40:41,629 - It was sickening. - Really. 789 00:40:41,699 --> 00:40:43,327 And-- And let me ask you this. 790 00:40:43,401 --> 00:40:45,461 At any point in your life did you ever think, like, 791 00:40:45,538 --> 00:40:47,972 "Maybe I'd like to have a child"? 792 00:40:52,811 --> 00:40:55,279 Um, I-l did have a child once. 793 00:40:55,346 --> 00:40:57,837 - Did you? - Ah, it was a sad story. 794 00:40:57,916 --> 00:41:00,180 I'll tell you some other time when I know you better. 795 00:41:00,251 --> 00:41:02,515 If I ever know you better. 796 00:41:03,522 --> 00:41:05,513 Are you free this afternoon? 797 00:41:05,591 --> 00:41:07,855 - Why? - You have some free time this afternoon? 798 00:41:07,927 --> 00:41:10,191 - Are you finally in the mood, Lenny? - No, no, no, no, no. 799 00:41:10,262 --> 00:41:12,321 I wanna-- I have an assignment. 800 00:41:12,398 --> 00:41:15,333 But I thought you might wanna come with me, 'cause I think you'll enjoy it. 801 00:41:21,774 --> 00:41:24,210 I'm gonna bet on a horse, and if it wins you can keep the dough. 802 00:41:24,277 --> 00:41:26,905 Here's one. "Eager Beaver." 803 00:41:26,980 --> 00:41:28,914 I once did a film called Beaver Patrol... 804 00:41:28,982 --> 00:41:31,610 about these Boy Scouts who find drunk Girl Scouts in the woods. 805 00:41:31,685 --> 00:41:35,212 And they take them into a cabin and they reach into their packs and they pull out these dildos. 806 00:41:35,288 --> 00:41:37,654 - And then-- - All right, all right. Okay, we'll-- 807 00:41:37,724 --> 00:41:39,658 Y-You're sure you want to bet on Eager Beaver? 808 00:41:39,726 --> 00:41:41,887 - 'Cause it's a 60-to-1. - Oh, yeah. No, I know it's the one. No! 809 00:41:41,962 --> 00:41:44,157 - But it's 60-to-1. - It's a sign. I know it's gonna work. 810 00:41:44,231 --> 00:41:46,290 All right, all right. Famous last words. 811 00:41:46,366 --> 00:41:48,391 - You know. - I got a hunch. 812 00:41:48,468 --> 00:41:50,663 - You got a hunch. Okay. Sure, we'll bet on it. - Yeah. 813 00:41:50,737 --> 00:41:52,171 Okay. So if he wins, how much do I make? 814 00:41:52,240 --> 00:41:55,403 At 60-to-1? Uh... you make, uh, $3,000. 815 00:41:55,476 --> 00:41:58,673 Oh, my God! I could get that blue chinchilla coat that I wanted! 816 00:41:58,746 --> 00:42:00,680 - You could get anything you want. - I could get a Jacuzzi. 817 00:42:00,748 --> 00:42:03,842 - Except he's not gonna win. - Oh, no, I know what I could do, Lenny! 818 00:42:03,918 --> 00:42:06,182 - Oh, my God! This is great. - Mm-hmm. 819 00:42:06,254 --> 00:42:08,586 All right. You know, I hope-- I hope you're right. 820 00:42:08,656 --> 00:42:11,682 There's a reason the horse is 60-to-1, though. He's probably got polio. 821 00:42:11,759 --> 00:42:13,353 Oh, no, no. No. This is a sign. 822 00:42:13,428 --> 00:42:15,521 - All right. - My luck is gonna change. 823 00:42:15,597 --> 00:42:18,964 - So is your real name Linda? Is that your actual name? - I use a lot of names. 824 00:42:19,034 --> 00:42:22,834 My born name is Leslie, but I like to use names that have nice meanings. 825 00:42:22,905 --> 00:42:24,839 You know, like Mary, for the Virgin Mary. 826 00:42:24,907 --> 00:42:27,467 Or Angel or Linda, which means "pretty" in Spanish. 827 00:42:27,543 --> 00:42:30,478 - But my screen name's Judy Cum. - Mm-hmm. 828 00:42:30,546 --> 00:42:32,980 Well, lucky there's not a horse with that name in the race... 829 00:42:33,048 --> 00:42:35,582 - 'cause we'd bet on him. - Oh, no, no, no. 830 00:42:35,650 --> 00:42:37,314 I mean, my attorney friend would take that under advisement. 831 00:42:37,386 --> 00:42:39,650 - Mm-hmm. - I got exclusive rights to that name. 832 00:42:39,721 --> 00:42:41,814 All right, all right, all right. Yeah. 833 00:42:41,890 --> 00:42:43,824 So let me ask you a question. 834 00:42:43,892 --> 00:42:46,656 Are you ever frightened that when a guy comes over your house and pays you... 835 00:42:46,728 --> 00:42:49,663 that he's gonna maybe, like tie you up and kill you? 836 00:42:49,731 --> 00:42:52,165 Oh, no. I always get paid in advance. 837 00:42:52,234 --> 00:42:54,930 - Come on. 838 00:42:55,003 --> 00:42:57,267 - Eager Beaver. He's paying. - Paid in advance? That's-- 839 00:42:57,339 --> 00:42:58,273 Lenny. 840 00:42:58,341 --> 00:43:00,275 - They're coming down to the finish. - Come on, Beaver! 841 00:43:00,343 --> 00:43:02,504 - It's Autumn Daisy and Enmity. - Come on! Catch up! 842 00:43:02,579 --> 00:43:04,843 - Eager Beaver continues to drop back. - Oh, shit! Oh, Beaver! 843 00:43:04,914 --> 00:43:07,940 - Autumn Daisy and Enmity. It's close. - Beaver! Come on, Beaver! 844 00:43:08,017 --> 00:43:10,417 - Oh! Beaver! - It's Autumn Daisy by a head. 845 00:43:10,486 --> 00:43:12,613 - Shit! Last? - Enmity finishing second... 846 00:43:12,689 --> 00:43:14,850 - and Lower The Flag finishing third, - Stupid horse got-- Damn it! 847 00:43:14,924 --> 00:43:17,018 - followed by Marcy's Pride, true Blue Crew, Classic Alert, - I had it spent already! 848 00:43:17,094 --> 00:43:19,392 - I know. Relax, relax. Relax, will ya? - and Eager Beaver was last. 849 00:43:19,463 --> 00:43:22,432 You know, it's not so terrible. I told you it was a long shot. 850 00:43:22,499 --> 00:43:24,626 - I never have any luck. Never! - All right. 851 00:43:24,702 --> 00:43:27,170 I never won a fucking thing in my entire life! Nothing! Never! 852 00:43:27,238 --> 00:43:30,765 Will you stay calm? You gotta learn to be a graceful loser. 853 00:43:30,841 --> 00:43:32,901 If it's the money, I'll lend you the money. 854 00:43:33,978 --> 00:43:35,912 - I can help you. - No, it's not the money, Lenny. 855 00:43:35,980 --> 00:43:38,245 I don't care about the money. I just wanted to win so badly. 856 00:43:38,316 --> 00:43:41,444 What do you want to win for? We're just out here having a good time. 857 00:43:41,519 --> 00:43:43,783 - You gotta-- - 'Cause I wanted to impress you. 858 00:43:43,855 --> 00:43:47,154 Impress me? What? You know, you're not running in the race. 859 00:43:47,225 --> 00:43:49,489 What-- You don't have to impress me. I'm-- 860 00:43:49,561 --> 00:43:52,086 Yeah, but I wanted to show you I could pick a winner. 861 00:43:52,163 --> 00:43:55,655 Hey. Listen, my horse didn't win either, you know. 862 00:43:55,734 --> 00:43:57,668 Come on, you-- you do impress me. 863 00:43:57,736 --> 00:44:00,331 You're attractive, you're-- you're quick, you have a lot of energy. 864 00:44:00,406 --> 00:44:02,840 - You're obviously a state-of-the-art fellatrix. - What? 865 00:44:02,909 --> 00:44:05,673 So-- Nothing, nothing. I'm impressed. Take-- 866 00:44:05,745 --> 00:44:07,679 - Lenny, don't say "nothing." - I'm impressed. 867 00:44:07,747 --> 00:44:10,113 - You think I'm stupid? - I don't think you're stupid, no. 868 00:44:10,182 --> 00:44:12,616 - No? - You know, I think you do a stupid thing with your life. 869 00:44:12,685 --> 00:44:14,619 But I told you that already. 870 00:44:14,687 --> 00:44:16,121 Well, I don't understand why it matters so much to you. 871 00:44:16,189 --> 00:44:19,386 Hey, come on. We'll stay for one more race, and this time I'll bet for you. 872 00:44:19,459 --> 00:44:21,552 - Yeah? - Let me make the bet. Yeah. N-No. Come on. 873 00:44:21,628 --> 00:44:23,687 - We'll just go to the window and I'll make one bet. - All right. 874 00:44:23,764 --> 00:44:25,823 Please don't pick one that runs second... 875 00:44:25,899 --> 00:44:27,833 - 'cause I want a winner, okay, Len? - Yeah. Hey. 876 00:44:27,901 --> 00:44:30,302 You know, they give these horses saliva tests. I can't guarantee anything. 877 00:44:34,942 --> 00:44:36,638 - I gave you your winnings, right? - Yeah. 878 00:44:36,711 --> 00:44:40,442 That was a great race. Too bad the horse only paid 40 cents. 879 00:44:40,515 --> 00:44:43,484 Well, he was a heavy favorite, you know, and I bet him to come in third. 880 00:44:43,551 --> 00:44:46,418 - At least this way you get something. - Yeah. 881 00:44:46,487 --> 00:44:48,421 So, you wanna come in? 882 00:44:48,489 --> 00:44:51,652 I gotta go home. I got a wife and kid. You know, I can't. 883 00:44:51,726 --> 00:44:55,753 You know, you only talk about me. You never talk about yourself. 884 00:44:55,830 --> 00:44:59,231 It's late for me. You know, I had a great time, but I gotta go. 885 00:44:59,300 --> 00:45:01,564 I feel I owe you a great fuck. 886 00:45:01,636 --> 00:45:05,663 Hey, do me a favor. Go upstairs, rest your ulcer, stay in tonight. 887 00:45:05,740 --> 00:45:07,368 I can't stay in. I got six dates. 888 00:45:07,443 --> 00:45:09,434 Six dates. Slow night for you, right? 889 00:45:09,511 --> 00:45:13,709 I wish I had the penicillin concession in your apartment. I'd-- I'd be wealthy. 890 00:45:13,782 --> 00:45:16,444 All right. So, you're gonna call me again? 891 00:45:16,518 --> 00:45:19,112 Am I gonna call you again? Yeah, I'll call you. Don't worry. 892 00:45:19,188 --> 00:45:21,452 - You promise? - I will. I'll call you again. 893 00:45:21,523 --> 00:45:23,718 Okay. I had a great time. 894 00:45:23,792 --> 00:45:25,726 - Bye. - Okay. 895 00:45:25,794 --> 00:45:27,728 Whew. 896 00:45:38,942 --> 00:45:41,274 - Congratulations. - Thirty-five years. 897 00:45:41,344 --> 00:45:43,278 - I never thought we'd make it. - You and Amanda... 898 00:45:43,346 --> 00:45:45,280 have a way to go, but you'll make it. 899 00:45:45,348 --> 00:45:47,475 - You guys look so young, both of you. - Yeah, you do. 900 00:45:47,550 --> 00:45:49,484 Well, we've kept each other young. 901 00:45:49,552 --> 00:45:52,146 Your mother could be your sister, and you could be brother and sister. 902 00:45:52,222 --> 00:45:55,157 - You could be my-- yes. - I don't know where that puts me, but anyway-- 903 00:45:58,095 --> 00:46:00,586 She looks so beautiful, doesn't she, Lenny? 904 00:46:00,664 --> 00:46:02,757 - To me, she always looks beautiful. - Mmm. 905 00:46:02,833 --> 00:46:04,767 -I just always find her great. And you-- 906 00:46:04,835 --> 00:46:07,770 When I said sisters before, I mean it. You guys look so great. 907 00:46:07,838 --> 00:46:10,363 And it's a wonder, with all the responsibility... 908 00:46:10,441 --> 00:46:12,773 she has opening her new gallery. 909 00:46:12,843 --> 00:46:15,403 - It's a lot of work. - What new gallery? A new gallery? 910 00:46:15,479 --> 00:46:18,107 No, I didn't tell you 'cause, you know, I don't know until it's a hundred percent definite. 911 00:46:18,182 --> 00:46:20,446 - Well, did I say the wrong thing? - But it's not. 912 00:46:20,518 --> 00:46:23,112 - No, sure. No, I just-- - It's a hundred percent definite. 913 00:46:23,187 --> 00:46:25,212 You're so insecure. It's happening. 914 00:46:25,289 --> 00:46:27,781 - Oh, excuse me. 915 00:46:27,859 --> 00:46:30,293 - What is the story on this? - It looks like I have the backing, 916 00:46:30,362 --> 00:46:32,296 but it's not totally definite. 917 00:46:32,364 --> 00:46:34,298 - That's why I didn't say anything. - Your mother said it was definite. 918 00:46:34,366 --> 00:46:36,459 Yeah, well. It seems as if I do have the backing. 919 00:46:36,535 --> 00:46:39,197 And there is this wonderful space on Vesey Street. You know it? 920 00:46:39,271 --> 00:46:41,466 - Vesey? Yeah, I know it. - Yeah, down in Soho. 921 00:46:41,540 --> 00:46:43,941 And it looks like, you know, we think we can get it. 922 00:46:44,010 --> 00:46:46,911 The Dorians are putting in some money, but I-- 923 00:46:46,979 --> 00:46:48,913 - Well, don't look so happy about it. - I am happy! 924 00:46:48,981 --> 00:46:52,212 I'm very happy for you, but it's the first I'm hearing of it, you know. 925 00:46:52,285 --> 00:46:54,719 - And for your mother to tell me-- - Yeah, well, look. 926 00:46:54,787 --> 00:46:57,381 I realize that for a time I'm going to be busier than usual... 927 00:46:57,457 --> 00:47:00,721 and I know that's a sore point, 928 00:47:00,792 --> 00:47:02,727 but, you know, it'll be only 'til it gets off the ground. 929 00:47:02,795 --> 00:47:04,229 - Hey, I'm happy for you. I re-- - You are? 930 00:47:04,298 --> 00:47:06,596 - Yes. I just would have liked to have known it. - Are you sure? 931 00:47:06,667 --> 00:47:09,465 - The Amanda Sloane Gallery. I think that it's great. - Yeah, on Vesey Street. 932 00:47:09,536 --> 00:47:12,972 Believe me. I haven't even told Jerry Bender yet. 933 00:47:13,040 --> 00:47:16,476 "You've got a fine right, you have, after the way you treated Mother, 934 00:47:16,543 --> 00:47:18,773 "after the way you treated us all! 935 00:47:18,846 --> 00:47:21,179 "A fine right you've got to come back in here in your best country manner... 936 00:47:21,249 --> 00:47:24,878 "and strike attitudes and make stands... 937 00:47:24,953 --> 00:47:27,615 "and criticize my fiance and give orders... 938 00:47:27,689 --> 00:47:29,919 "and mess things up generally as if you'd done-- 939 00:47:29,991 --> 00:47:31,959 "Well, I can't help it. It's sickening! 940 00:47:32,026 --> 00:47:34,961 As if he'd done nothing at all!" 941 00:47:37,999 --> 00:47:39,933 Well? 942 00:47:40,001 --> 00:47:41,935 What do you think? 943 00:47:42,003 --> 00:47:44,801 - About what? - About me. 944 00:47:44,873 --> 00:47:47,001 - You think I'm any good? - Yes, it's fine. 945 00:47:47,076 --> 00:47:49,010 I-- You know, you're asking the wrong person. 946 00:47:49,078 --> 00:47:51,069 I don't know that much about acting, to tell you the truth. 947 00:47:51,147 --> 00:47:53,081 Oh, I can tell you're not too impressed. 948 00:47:53,149 --> 00:47:56,414 No, no, no. I just thought, you know, it's a very odd part for you to choose. 949 00:47:56,485 --> 00:47:59,420 - Why? - Well, you know, 'cause it's The Philadelphia Story. 950 00:47:59,488 --> 00:48:02,514 - But I lived in Philadelphia. - What has that got to do with it? 951 00:48:02,591 --> 00:48:06,994 - I know the city. - What? You pick a part like this-- 952 00:48:07,062 --> 00:48:10,429 You should get something closer to yourself. It wouldn't be such a struggle. 953 00:48:10,499 --> 00:48:12,592 - You know. - Well, what part should I play? 954 00:48:12,668 --> 00:48:14,102 You know-- I don't know. Something closer. 955 00:48:14,171 --> 00:48:16,765 Clint Eastwood doesn't play a meek little hairdresser. 956 00:48:16,840 --> 00:48:19,104 Well, I could play a hairdresser. 957 00:48:19,176 --> 00:48:21,440 I-I used to-- I used to do it a lot. 958 00:48:21,511 --> 00:48:23,445 I wanted to be one. I was very good at it. 959 00:48:23,513 --> 00:48:26,107 - So why'd you give it up? - Well, I don't know. 960 00:48:26,183 --> 00:48:28,117 One thing led to another. 961 00:48:28,185 --> 00:48:30,210 You know, my aunt worked in a beauty parlor for years. 962 00:48:30,287 --> 00:48:32,847 She loved it. 963 00:48:32,923 --> 00:48:35,858 Wait. You mean not be an actress? 964 00:48:35,926 --> 00:48:38,724 Well, an actress is a very tough life, you know. 965 00:48:38,795 --> 00:48:41,593 - But a hairdresser could always make a buck. - A buck? 966 00:48:41,665 --> 00:48:43,463 A buck! An honest buck. No beatings, no AIDS. 967 00:48:43,534 --> 00:48:45,468 You can meet somebody that you, you know-- 968 00:48:45,536 --> 00:48:48,801 You can get a family, have a real life, someone that cares for you. 969 00:48:48,873 --> 00:48:50,807 Hey! 970 00:48:50,875 --> 00:48:53,469 Now, don't you think that I want to meet somebody and get married... 971 00:48:53,544 --> 00:48:55,808 and get the hell out of the rat race? 972 00:48:55,880 --> 00:48:57,974 I would like to move away and become a mother and just raise kids. 973 00:48:58,050 --> 00:48:59,984 I don't even want to be a hairdresser. 974 00:49:00,052 --> 00:49:03,418 If Clint Eastwood wants to be a hairdresser, just let him. 975 00:49:03,487 --> 00:49:06,423 You missed the point. Clint Eastwood doesn't want to be a hairdresser. 976 00:49:06,491 --> 00:49:09,016 I had a kid, Lenny, 977 00:49:09,094 --> 00:49:11,528 and I gave him up for adoption. 978 00:49:13,098 --> 00:49:17,535 It's the sorriest thing I ever did in my entire life. 979 00:49:18,937 --> 00:49:22,031 There's not a day that doesn't go by that I don't... 980 00:49:22,107 --> 00:49:25,099 wake up thinking about him. 981 00:49:25,177 --> 00:49:27,441 Now some lucky family has him. 982 00:49:27,512 --> 00:49:30,948 I just hope to God that they're taking good care of him. 983 00:49:31,451 --> 00:49:34,113 Why'd you give him up? 984 00:49:34,187 --> 00:49:35,951 I don't know. I was-- I was all confused. 985 00:49:36,023 --> 00:49:40,220 I had no dough. I-I-- I didn't know what to do. 986 00:49:40,293 --> 00:49:42,352 I-- 987 00:49:42,428 --> 00:49:44,362 I didn't even know who the father was. 988 00:49:44,430 --> 00:49:47,126 It could've been any one of a hundred guys. 989 00:49:47,200 --> 00:49:50,135 Welcome to planet Earth, thanks to a broken condom. 990 00:49:52,572 --> 00:49:56,406 Gee. That's tough. 991 00:49:57,311 --> 00:50:00,245 Um. 992 00:50:00,447 --> 00:50:02,972 What about your kid? 993 00:50:03,050 --> 00:50:06,178 Max? M-M-Ma-- You know. Max is the greatest. 994 00:50:06,253 --> 00:50:08,414 - Yeah? - Well, sure. 995 00:50:08,489 --> 00:50:11,151 Do you have a picture of him? 996 00:50:11,225 --> 00:50:14,922 - A picture of Max? - Yeah. I'd like to see him. 997 00:50:14,995 --> 00:50:16,929 Oh. 998 00:50:16,997 --> 00:50:19,431 Uh, yeah, I guess I-- 999 00:50:25,840 --> 00:50:28,832 Oh. 1000 00:50:30,912 --> 00:50:34,473 He's very sweet. He-- 1001 00:50:34,549 --> 00:50:36,483 You're very lucky. 1002 00:50:36,551 --> 00:50:38,519 With Amanda, it was fate. 1003 00:50:38,586 --> 00:50:40,645 With Linda, it's hubris. 1004 00:50:40,722 --> 00:50:44,216 His drive to find out, and now, to change her life, to control her. 1005 00:50:44,293 --> 00:50:46,261 - Yes. - Danger. 1006 00:50:46,329 --> 00:50:49,765 Wait. Wait, I see... danger. 1007 00:50:49,832 --> 00:50:53,495 Hey, wait a minute. I don't have any interest in controlling her. 1008 00:50:53,569 --> 00:50:55,594 I'm doing this for Max's sake. 1009 00:50:55,671 --> 00:50:59,334 When the kid gets older, inevitably he's gonna trace his mother. 1010 00:50:59,408 --> 00:51:01,672 And, you know, I'd be happier... 1011 00:51:01,744 --> 00:51:04,043 if she was married and a-- a hairdresser, you know, 1012 00:51:04,114 --> 00:51:07,049 rather than the star of The Enchanted Pussy. 1013 00:51:07,117 --> 00:51:11,110 Danger! I see horrible, horrible danger! 1014 00:51:11,188 --> 00:51:14,919 - Terrible danger! - Hey, I can handle myself emotionally. 1015 00:51:14,991 --> 00:51:18,518 Not emotional danger, physical danger. 1016 00:51:18,595 --> 00:51:21,962 I see a bald man. He has a lead pipe. 1017 00:51:22,032 --> 00:51:24,466 He's breaking your kneecaps. 1018 00:51:29,807 --> 00:51:32,469 So, so, uh, what did, uh-- How did Jerry Bender take it... 1019 00:51:32,543 --> 00:51:35,068 when you said that the decision was final? 1020 00:51:35,146 --> 00:51:37,137 You know what? He was amazing. 1021 00:51:37,215 --> 00:51:41,276 I thought he'd be upset, but no, he was very excited and very supportive. 1022 00:51:41,352 --> 00:51:44,219 No, he's being-- He was absolutely great about it. 1023 00:51:44,288 --> 00:51:47,280 Anyway, I-l'm calling to say I can't make dinner tonight. 1024 00:51:47,358 --> 00:51:49,223 Oh, you're kidding. It's gonna be great. 1025 00:51:49,293 --> 00:51:53,491 Everybody in the Madison Square Garden organization's gonna be there. 1026 00:51:53,564 --> 00:51:55,498 Look, there's no way I can get away. 1027 00:51:55,566 --> 00:51:57,592 The architects are here and the Dorians are in town from Paris. 1028 00:51:57,669 --> 00:52:01,503 And, uh, the architects fly back to Milan tonight. I can't. 1029 00:52:01,573 --> 00:52:04,838 All right, well. I'll tell you what. 1030 00:52:04,910 --> 00:52:07,504 What I'll do is, I'll go home and I'll put Max to sleep. 1031 00:52:07,579 --> 00:52:09,604 I'll spend a little time there and then-- 1032 00:52:09,681 --> 00:52:11,945 Then-- Oh. 1033 00:52:12,017 --> 00:52:14,952 Uh, look, let me-- I'm gonna call you back. I got, uh-- 1034 00:52:15,020 --> 00:52:16,420 I'm gonna call you back. Oh, geez. 1035 00:52:16,489 --> 00:52:18,423 It's just against our policy-- - I understand! 1036 00:52:18,491 --> 00:52:20,425 - If you wanna wait right here. - Whatever. 1037 00:52:20,493 --> 00:52:22,427 -Lenny, there's someone here to see you. -Lenny! 1038 00:52:22,495 --> 00:52:25,020 - Uh, yes. Uh, c-c-come in. Come in. - Lenny! 1039 00:52:25,098 --> 00:52:27,623 - Th-This is Miss Gildersleeve. She's an acquaintance. - You know her? 1040 00:52:27,700 --> 00:52:29,134 - Gildersleeve? - Yes, Miss-- Miss Gildersleeve. 1041 00:52:29,203 --> 00:52:32,297 We're old-- It's okay. It's okay. I'll be in here. 1042 00:52:32,373 --> 00:52:34,807 - You don't need anything? - No, no! I'm fine. 1043 00:52:34,875 --> 00:52:36,809 - Okay. - I'm fine. 1044 00:52:36,877 --> 00:52:39,471 - What are you doing here? - Lenny? Lenny, I got to talk to you. 1045 00:52:39,547 --> 00:52:41,879 Ricky threatened to-- to-- to hurt me. He-- 1046 00:52:41,949 --> 00:52:45,544 - Who's Ricky? - He takes a percentage of my work. 1047 00:52:45,619 --> 00:52:48,180 - He's a pimp, right? - No, he's like a business representative. 1048 00:52:48,256 --> 00:52:50,417 What do you need a business repre-- You-- You-- 1049 00:52:50,492 --> 00:52:53,757 All you need is a mattress and a couple of garter belts. You're not a conglomerate. 1050 00:52:53,829 --> 00:52:56,093 Lenny, he said he was going to cut me up... 1051 00:52:56,164 --> 00:52:58,598 because I told him I didn't want to work anymore. 1052 00:52:58,667 --> 00:53:02,228 Well, I think it's a great idea that you want to phase out. 1053 00:53:02,300 --> 00:53:04,228 he has no quelms about killing me. 1054 00:53:04,439 --> 00:53:05,600 Listen, we'll call the police. That's not a big deal. 1055 00:53:05,675 --> 00:53:08,269 How can I call the police with my setup? 1056 00:53:08,344 --> 00:53:11,040 You know, I told you a thousand times... 1057 00:53:11,113 --> 00:53:13,172 you're in a hazardous business. 1058 00:53:13,249 --> 00:53:15,615 So that's what happens. Now, so-- Don't go outside. 1059 00:53:15,685 --> 00:53:18,813 I'm not going outside. I thought, just maybe, if you could talk to him. 1060 00:53:18,888 --> 00:53:20,356 - Me? What, are you nuts? - Yeah, because-- 1061 00:53:20,724 --> 00:53:24,120 Because you're smart and bright and you got a way with words. 1062 00:53:24,193 --> 00:53:26,388 I can't talk to him. I don't even know the guy. 1063 00:53:26,462 --> 00:53:29,397 Yeah, well, he knows it was your idea that I get out of the business. 1064 00:53:29,465 --> 00:53:31,524 So he said he's gonna kill you too. 1065 00:53:31,601 --> 00:53:34,297 - He said he was gonna kill me? - Yeah, 'cause it was your idea. 1066 00:53:34,370 --> 00:53:37,329 He's gonna cut up my face and put a bullet between your eyes. 1067 00:53:37,407 --> 00:53:40,934 Really? Did he-- Did he specify the caliber? 1068 00:53:41,011 --> 00:53:44,412 Listen, I just thought maybe you could just reason with him. 1069 00:53:44,481 --> 00:53:47,450 No, I can't. I-- Listen, I never told you this, 1070 00:53:47,518 --> 00:53:50,078 but I got a-- a slight heart murmur... 1071 00:53:50,153 --> 00:53:52,485 and right now it's murmuring "hide." 1072 00:53:52,556 --> 00:53:54,490 - I don't believe you're a coward. 1073 00:53:54,558 --> 00:53:57,254 Only in actuality. Um, this is not for me. 1074 00:53:57,327 --> 00:54:00,091 - Lenny, I need your help. - No, I'm not a violence person. 1075 00:54:00,163 --> 00:54:04,099 I-I write about hockey and boxing and football. This is not my world. 1076 00:54:04,167 --> 00:54:07,330 Lenny, I do want to quit like you said, but he said he's not gonna let me! 1077 00:54:07,404 --> 00:54:10,032 - He's gonna hurt us both. Please! - Relax, relax. 1078 00:54:10,107 --> 00:54:13,099 What do you want me to do? How am I gonna talk to him? 1079 00:54:13,176 --> 00:54:15,110 - Well, okay. You just-- - I-- 1080 00:54:15,178 --> 00:54:17,443 You just talk because you're smarter than he is and stronger than he is. 1081 00:54:17,515 --> 00:54:20,279 You're a much better man. So just remember that when you talk to him. 1082 00:54:20,351 --> 00:54:24,117 He's a little bit intimidating. He's got a bald head and an earring. 1083 00:54:24,188 --> 00:54:27,248 - But you'll win. I know you will. - Jesus, I-- I-- 1084 00:54:27,325 --> 00:54:29,452 You're a good man, Lenny. You'll win. 1085 00:54:29,527 --> 00:54:31,461 Look, in case anything comes up, 1086 00:54:31,529 --> 00:54:35,693 I want you to know that I-l'm type O-positive, okay? 1087 00:54:35,767 --> 00:54:37,793 Derek, I got the feeling you came here and obviously moved... 1088 00:54:37,870 --> 00:54:39,804 into this whole Knick persona. 1089 00:54:39,872 --> 00:54:42,466 - Did you get caught up, maybe, with a little bit of this Knick, - Excuse me. 1090 00:54:42,541 --> 00:54:44,907 "I gotta be physical, I gotta be tough," and maybe-- 1091 00:54:44,977 --> 00:54:46,911 I'm, uh, I'm Lenny Gildersleeve. 1092 00:54:46,979 --> 00:54:50,244 I-- I'm a friend of Linda-- Linda Ash's. 1093 00:54:50,316 --> 00:54:52,752 And, uh, I thought that perhaps we could-- 1094 00:54:52,819 --> 00:54:54,753 See-- 1095 00:54:54,821 --> 00:54:57,085 What I want to discuss with you is that... 1096 00:54:57,157 --> 00:55:00,183 there comes a time in the life of every young woman, 1097 00:55:00,260 --> 00:55:02,319 not just Linda, but everyone, 1098 00:55:02,395 --> 00:55:06,161 that they-- they want to perhaps make a change in their life. 1099 00:55:06,232 --> 00:55:09,759 They maybe want to settle down or explore alternative lifestyles. 1100 00:55:09,836 --> 00:55:13,602 I don't think you've been a very good influence on Linda, Mr. Weinrib. 1101 00:55:13,673 --> 00:55:17,973 Weinrib. Right. So Gildersleeve is a name I use for business purposes. 1102 00:55:18,044 --> 00:55:19,444 - I got an investment in Linda. - No question. 1103 00:55:19,513 --> 00:55:22,038 I honor that. But-- But by now, she's probably... 1104 00:55:22,116 --> 00:55:24,107 repaid you tenfold or twentyfold or-- 1105 00:55:24,185 --> 00:55:27,382 Don't be so fuckin' sure, 'cause you don't know what the fuckin' numbers are! 1106 00:55:27,455 --> 00:55:30,447 That's a point well taken. Excuse me, you're-- you're-- Excuse me. 1107 00:55:30,524 --> 00:55:33,220 I-I-I understand what you're saying. Is that a Pellegrino? 1108 00:55:33,294 --> 00:55:36,525 Can I-- Because you've bent my throat now a little bit. 1109 00:55:36,597 --> 00:55:39,430 And, uh, the windpipe used to hang straight until this moment. 1110 00:55:39,500 --> 00:55:40,434 The fuckin' Knicks suck! 1111 00:55:40,502 --> 00:55:42,436 They need a good shootin' forward. 1112 00:55:42,504 --> 00:55:44,563 Yes, well, there's gonna be a three-way trade. 1113 00:55:44,640 --> 00:55:46,574 I don't know if you guys heard anything about it. 1114 00:55:46,642 --> 00:55:48,906 - Seattle, Atlanta and the Knicks are talking. - Bullshit. 1115 00:55:48,977 --> 00:55:51,070 - No, no, no. I kid you not. I know. It's in the air. - Yeah? 1116 00:55:51,146 --> 00:55:53,205 - They're discussing a trade. - So what do you think about the Nets? 1117 00:55:53,281 --> 00:55:55,306 - You think the Nets got a chance? - The Nets? Yes, I do. 1118 00:55:55,384 --> 00:55:57,750 If they're injury-free, I think they have a good chance. 1119 00:55:57,819 --> 00:56:00,185 I like the Nets. I think they're one or two years away, is all. 1120 00:56:00,255 --> 00:56:02,189 I would say two or three myself. 1121 00:56:02,257 --> 00:56:04,283 You see, we have a common interest, the three of us. 1122 00:56:04,360 --> 00:56:07,090 - What were we talking about? - Linda, Linda Ash. 1123 00:56:07,163 --> 00:56:10,428 Oh, yeah, yeah. That girl's goin' no place. 1124 00:56:10,500 --> 00:56:14,095 She walks on me, I'll disfigure her and I'll fuckin' kill you. 1125 00:56:14,170 --> 00:56:17,435 See, that's exactly what Dr. Kleinholtz would call "acting out." 1126 00:56:17,507 --> 00:56:19,600 - Don't tell me how to run my fuckin' business! - I'm not! 1127 00:56:19,676 --> 00:56:21,610 My girls do what I tell 'em to do. 1128 00:56:21,678 --> 00:56:22,612 Far be it for me to advise you. 1129 00:56:22,680 --> 00:56:24,978 You obviously have a work ethic that's specific to your needs. 1130 00:56:25,049 --> 00:56:28,109 That's why you can afford an establishment like this, you know. 1131 00:56:28,185 --> 00:56:30,278 You're gonna take that from him? 1132 00:56:30,354 --> 00:56:33,414 Take it easy. Take it easy. 1133 00:56:33,490 --> 00:56:36,254 I'm about to have an out-of-body-experience here. 1134 00:56:36,326 --> 00:56:38,760 - Show strength. - Show strength? 1135 00:56:38,829 --> 00:56:41,798 This guy's gonna put me into 27 separate Mason jars. 1136 00:56:41,865 --> 00:56:44,130 The girl was right. They respect strength. They despise cowardice. 1137 00:56:44,202 --> 00:56:46,227 Power is all they know. Stand firm. 1138 00:56:46,304 --> 00:56:48,363 - Remember brave Achilles. - Hey, don't get-- 1139 00:56:48,440 --> 00:56:51,807 Achilles only had an Achilles heel. I have a full Achilles body. 1140 00:56:51,876 --> 00:56:55,073 - Go on! 1141 00:56:55,146 --> 00:56:57,614 Look, I'm gonna level with you. 1142 00:56:57,682 --> 00:57:00,583 I want to discuss this Linda Ash thing and I-I-- 1143 00:57:00,652 --> 00:57:03,519 What are you so interested in Linda for anyway, huh? 1144 00:57:03,588 --> 00:57:05,284 - Are you fuckin' her? - No, we have a strictly platonic relationship. 1145 00:57:05,357 --> 00:57:07,291 - Yeah? - It's a good shirt. 1146 00:57:07,359 --> 00:57:10,624 Well, if you're a friend of hers, don't be putting stupid ideas in her head. 1147 00:57:10,696 --> 00:57:13,130 She's liable to get hurt. You too. 1148 00:57:13,199 --> 00:57:15,292 You're gonna let him do that to you? 1149 00:57:15,367 --> 00:57:17,801 Hey, look. Would you do me a favor and go back to Athens? 1150 00:57:17,870 --> 00:57:21,136 You gonna let your son's mother remain a white slave to this two-bit pimp? 1151 00:57:21,208 --> 00:57:23,142 It-- It's starting to look that way, isn't it? 1152 00:57:23,210 --> 00:57:25,144 - You get them Knicks tickets yet? - No tickets. 1153 00:57:25,212 --> 00:57:27,146 - I tried everywhere. 1154 00:57:27,214 --> 00:57:30,479 - Do you need tickets to the Knicks game? Because I-- - Why? Who do you know? 1155 00:57:30,550 --> 00:57:32,484 Me? I-I can help you. 1156 00:57:32,552 --> 00:57:34,816 We want seats on the floor, next to the movie stars. 1157 00:57:34,888 --> 00:57:37,652 If you want to discuss a deal with Linda, I can get you courtside seats. 1158 00:57:37,724 --> 00:57:39,988 You can't get 'em. Nobody can get 'em, 'cause I tried. 1159 00:57:40,060 --> 00:57:42,654 No, I can, though. I-- I'm a sportswriter. I can get 'em. 1160 00:57:42,729 --> 00:57:44,323 I'd fuckin' give you my mother for courtside seats, 1161 00:57:44,398 --> 00:57:46,332 much less this cheap little whore. 1162 00:57:46,400 --> 00:57:49,494 That's perfectly put, succinctly put. I know what point you're making. 1163 00:57:49,570 --> 00:57:52,232 - But if you're tryin' to fuckin' pull something, - Easy. Take it-- 1164 00:57:52,306 --> 00:57:55,173 I will shoot you and her through the fuckin' eyeballs! 1165 00:57:55,243 --> 00:57:58,337 It's silly to haggle over details. 1166 00:57:58,412 --> 00:58:01,575 Well, I'll get the tickets. I'll get the tickets, I promise. 1167 00:58:01,649 --> 00:58:04,083 Then we can discuss Linda. 1168 00:58:10,559 --> 00:58:12,493 Dad, are you very brave? 1169 00:58:12,561 --> 00:58:15,496 Am I brave? It's funny you should ask that question. 1170 00:58:15,564 --> 00:58:18,499 Who'd win a fight, you versus Mike Tyson? 1171 00:58:18,567 --> 00:58:21,001 What? What? Who would win what? 1172 00:58:21,069 --> 00:58:24,004 Who'd win a fight, you versus Mike Tyson? 1173 00:58:24,072 --> 00:58:27,508 - Me versus Mike Tyson? Who do you think would win? - You? 1174 00:58:27,576 --> 00:58:29,510 There'd be no contest, you know. 1175 00:58:29,578 --> 00:58:33,014 He would probably take the early rounds, but I'd get to him eventually. 1176 00:58:32,081 --> 00:58:35,517 I'd chase him all over the ring. It's my style. Always was. 1177 00:58:35,585 --> 00:58:38,520 On the whole, I think it will work. Yeah, I think it will. 1178 00:58:38,588 --> 00:58:42,024 The only thing is, I want the gallery to be lit from above, 1179 00:58:42,091 --> 00:58:45,026 so I guess the skylight will have to be enlarged. 1180 00:58:45,094 --> 00:58:47,528 - Honey? Bed? Could you? - Me or him? 1181 00:58:47,597 --> 00:58:50,532 Him. Please? 1182 00:58:58,408 --> 00:59:01,343 No, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I can't do this. I can't. 1183 00:59:01,411 --> 00:59:04,347 -Why are you fighting this? -'Cause I'm married and I have a family. 1184 00:59:04,415 --> 00:59:06,349 A-And I love Lenny. 1185 00:59:07,585 --> 00:59:09,519 I love him. 1186 00:59:09,587 --> 00:59:12,021 So, who are you trying to convince, you or me? 1187 00:59:18,596 --> 00:59:21,030 - I got you a present. - You're kidding. 1188 00:59:21,098 --> 00:59:24,033 Yeah. For fixing things up with me and Ricky. 1189 00:59:24,101 --> 00:59:27,036 - I know he can be really rough. - That was completely unnecessary. 1190 00:59:27,104 --> 00:59:29,038 Very sweet, but completely unnecessary. 1191 00:59:29,106 --> 00:59:32,974 You didn't want a blow job, so the least I could do was get you a tie. 1192 00:59:33,043 --> 00:59:34,977 Good thinking. That's uh-- Oh! 1193 00:59:35,045 --> 00:59:36,479 - Yes, it's a tie, isn't it? 1194 00:59:36,548 --> 00:59:39,984 - Would you ever wear anything that bright? - If the occasion demanded. 1195 00:59:40,051 --> 00:59:44,147 You know, like if I ever get invited to the Mardi Gras, I could-- 1196 00:59:44,222 --> 00:59:47,658 Oh, good. Lenny, do you want a sandwich? I'm gonna have a sandwich. 1197 00:59:47,726 --> 00:59:50,661 - No, I'm fine. Thank you. - Oh, okay. 1198 00:59:50,729 --> 00:59:53,163 - It's great. - Good. 1199 00:59:53,231 --> 00:59:55,165 You know what, Lenny? 1200 00:59:55,233 --> 00:59:57,669 I couldn't get your son's picture out of my mind. 1201 00:59:57,737 --> 01:00:00,672 - Well, he's a very cute kid, you know. - Yeah. 1202 01:00:00,740 --> 01:00:02,674 Len? 1203 01:00:02,742 --> 01:00:05,677 I think I would be a good mother. 1204 01:00:05,745 --> 01:00:08,680 I think you'd be a great mother. You're very affectionate. 1205 01:00:08,748 --> 01:00:10,682 - Yeah? - Mm-hmm. 1206 01:00:10,750 --> 01:00:14,186 I would like to start over again. Maybe have a house. That would be nice. 1207 01:00:14,253 --> 01:00:16,188 It would be great, you know. I think it'd be fabulous. 1208 01:00:16,256 --> 01:00:18,190 - And you could do it. - Yeah? 1209 01:00:18,258 --> 01:00:21,193 - Yeah. Mm-hmm. - The problem is, now, finding the right guy. 1210 01:00:21,261 --> 01:00:24,196 I need to find somebody who'll love me, you know. 1211 01:00:24,264 --> 01:00:26,198 Somebody who'll take care of me and respect me. 1212 01:00:26,266 --> 01:00:28,200 Well, I'll keep my eye open. 1213 01:00:28,268 --> 01:00:30,702 You know, maybe-- maybe-- who knows? 1214 01:00:30,771 --> 01:00:34,707 The only thing is, Len, he'd have to be as smart as me. 1215 01:00:34,775 --> 01:00:37,211 I'm sure there's somebody out there, you know, that can-- 1216 01:00:37,278 --> 01:00:39,712 - You'll find an equal somewhere. - Yeah? 1217 01:00:39,781 --> 01:00:42,716 And don't worry, Len. I gave up on you. 1218 01:00:42,784 --> 01:00:44,718 - M-- - I knew it couldn't be. 1219 01:00:44,786 --> 01:00:47,983 Let me tell you, at my age, if I made love with you, 1220 01:00:48,056 --> 01:00:50,422 they would have to put me on a resuscitator. 1221 01:00:50,491 --> 01:00:51,924 Ha. 1222 01:00:51,993 --> 01:00:53,927 - This is Max. 1223 01:00:53,995 --> 01:00:55,929 - Max. - This is my kid. 1224 01:00:55,997 --> 01:00:57,931 - How old are you? - I'm five. 1225 01:00:57,999 --> 01:00:59,933 - You're five? You gonna be a fighter? - Yeah. 1226 01:01:00,001 --> 01:01:01,936 Max is gonna be a middleweight when he gets older. 1227 01:01:02,004 --> 01:01:04,939 He's gonna be a heavyweight, the way you're carryin' him. 1228 01:01:05,007 --> 01:01:08,568 I'm gonna teach you how to box, Max. I'm gonna show you a combination punch. 1229 01:01:08,644 --> 01:01:11,579 One-five, one-five. Two, three and four, you're gonna get. 1230 01:01:11,647 --> 01:01:14,582 - Hey, Ray. This is my kid Max. - How you doin', Max? 1231 01:01:14,650 --> 01:01:17,585 Max is gonna be a middleweight when he gets older. 1232 01:01:17,653 --> 01:01:20,918 - Maybe a heavyweight? Yeah, I think a heavyweight. 1233 01:01:20,990 --> 01:01:23,925 - You wanna go hit the bag with me? - Okay. 1234 01:01:23,993 --> 01:01:25,927 - Nice kid. - He's a doll. 1235 01:01:25,995 --> 01:01:27,929 So, what's with the Sanchez thing? 1236 01:01:27,997 --> 01:01:30,932 Is he gonna win that? ls he training? ls he not training? 1237 01:01:31,000 --> 01:01:33,935 - He can do it. He's in the best shape of his life. - Yeah? 1238 01:01:34,003 --> 01:01:36,938 The only thing is, you don't know what these guys do outside the gym. 1239 01:01:37,006 --> 01:01:38,941 - Well, that's the point. You hear all these stories. - He'll be all right. 1240 01:01:39,009 --> 01:01:42,445 Hey, Kevin, come here. I wanna introduce you to my friend Lenny Weinrib. 1241 01:01:42,512 --> 01:01:46,448 - He's a sportswriter. He writes about boxing. - How you doin'? 1242 01:01:46,516 --> 01:01:48,952 - Listen, I'm gonna get warmed up, all right? - Show us what you can do. 1243 01:01:49,020 --> 01:01:51,955 - My hand's still a little sore. - Wrap it up good. You'll be okay. 1244 01:01:52,023 --> 01:01:55,459 - I don't know that kid. - This kid can move. He hits good too. 1245 01:01:55,526 --> 01:01:57,460 Got nice hand speed, you know? 1246 01:01:57,528 --> 01:02:00,964 Only thing is, you don't know about these guys-- sometimes they lack desire. 1247 01:02:01,032 --> 01:02:03,967 I seen it a million times. I don't know if he's got the killer instinct. 1248 01:02:04,035 --> 01:02:07,971 Keeps talkin' about goin' back upstate where he comes from on an onion farm. 1249 01:02:08,039 --> 01:02:10,475 - He wants to be an onion farmer. You believe it? - That kid's a farmer? 1250 01:02:10,542 --> 01:02:12,976 He's an onion farmer, yeah. I don't know how long he's gonna stick around. 1251 01:02:13,045 --> 01:02:16,981 That's the problem. It's a shame too; he hits like a fuckin' mule. 1252 01:02:17,049 --> 01:02:20,485 He's fast, but he wants to quit boxing, go back and hang out on the farm. 1253 01:02:20,552 --> 01:02:22,417 You know, retire. 1254 01:02:22,487 --> 01:02:25,923 And the worst thing of all is, his girlfriend left him. 1255 01:02:25,991 --> 01:02:27,925 - She quit on him. - Really? 1256 01:02:27,993 --> 01:02:28,927 Took him for everything he's got. 1257 01:02:28,995 --> 01:02:32,931 He's a nice, sweet kid, but between you and I, he ain't got too much upstairs. 1258 01:02:32,999 --> 01:02:35,934 They're all alike. Hey, Len, what's the matter with you? 1259 01:02:36,002 --> 01:02:38,937 Looks like you got somethin' on your mind. I don't understand. 1260 01:02:39,005 --> 01:02:40,905 Hey, Bo! 1261 01:02:40,973 --> 01:02:43,908 This-- This is the left, and this is the right. 1262 01:02:43,976 --> 01:02:46,911 - Right? - Yeah, yeah, Kevin, that's right. 1263 01:02:46,979 --> 01:02:48,913 Yeah. 1264 01:02:51,083 --> 01:02:53,017 Bye-bye. 1265 01:02:53,085 --> 01:02:56,020 - Hi, Lenny. I'm so sorry I'm late. - It's okay. 1266 01:02:56,088 --> 01:02:58,023 - It's starting to rain. - Oh, I don't have an umbrella 1267 01:02:58,091 --> 01:03:00,527 I met a guy this afternoon that I think would be absolutely great for you. 1268 01:03:00,594 --> 01:03:02,528 - Perfect. - For me? 1269 01:03:02,596 --> 01:03:05,531 - Yes. He's young, he's strong, he's healthy. - What does he do? 1270 01:03:05,599 --> 01:03:09,534 H-H-He's, you know, like, dicking around in agriculture. 1271 01:03:09,602 --> 01:03:11,536 What's wrong with his dick? 1272 01:03:11,604 --> 01:03:13,538 No, no, no, he's a farmer. The guy's a farmer. 1273 01:03:13,606 --> 01:03:15,541 - You met a farmer? - Yeah, an onion farmer. It's great. 1274 01:03:15,609 --> 01:03:17,543 - Where? - At the gym. 1275 01:03:17,611 --> 01:03:19,478 What the hell is an onion farmer doing at the gym? 1276 01:03:19,547 --> 01:03:23,483 He's-- He's f-finishing a-a-a very productive career as a boxer. 1277 01:03:23,551 --> 01:03:26,485 A boxer? Oh, Lenny. 1278 01:03:26,553 --> 01:03:29,989 No, he's-- Look, he doesn't want to be a boxer anymore. 1279 01:03:30,057 --> 01:03:32,993 H-He's-- He wants to meet the right girl and be a farmer. 1280 01:03:33,061 --> 01:03:36,997 - Don't look at me. - He's per-- His brother has a big onion farm upstate. 1281 01:03:37,065 --> 01:03:40,000 Just think of it. It'd be so great. 1282 01:03:40,068 --> 01:03:44,266 A small town, and you're-- y-you're hairdressing and, and raising kids. 1283 01:03:44,339 --> 01:03:46,273 What small town? 1284 01:03:46,341 --> 01:03:48,775 - Wampsville. - Where? 1285 01:03:48,843 --> 01:03:51,277 Wampsville. It's an old Indian name. 1286 01:03:51,346 --> 01:03:53,280 I-I-It's a place rich in American heritage. 1287 01:03:53,348 --> 01:03:54,282 Are you off your fucking rocker? 1288 01:03:54,350 --> 01:03:56,786 I'm gonna go marry an onion farmer and do hair in Wimpsville? 1289 01:03:56,853 --> 01:03:58,787 Wampsville, not Wimpsville. 1290 01:03:58,855 --> 01:04:02,016 It's so perfect. He's a nice, sweet guy. 1291 01:04:02,091 --> 01:04:04,025 Oh, come on. Forget it. 1292 01:04:04,093 --> 01:04:07,028 He's perfect, though. He's bright-- You'll think he's bright. 1293 01:04:07,096 --> 01:04:09,031 - He is a fucking onion farmer. - That's okay. 1294 01:04:09,099 --> 01:04:12,034 He's a nice kid. More important, he's honest and decent. 1295 01:04:12,102 --> 01:04:15,037 And don't offer to give him a blow job in the first five minutes, 1296 01:04:15,105 --> 01:04:18,040 - 'cause he thinks you're a hairdresser. - You lied? 1297 01:04:18,108 --> 01:04:20,042 - I-- - You shouldn't lie. 1298 01:04:20,110 --> 01:04:23,602 Just do what I'm telling you. Just listen to me for once. 1299 01:04:23,680 --> 01:04:25,614 I'm off the girls, Lenny. 1300 01:04:25,682 --> 01:04:28,617 I mean, the last girl I was with cheated me out of all my dough, man. 1301 01:04:28,685 --> 01:04:31,620 I'm telling you, this is a nice kid, Kevin. She's nice. 1302 01:04:31,688 --> 01:04:34,623 -This the hairdresser you told me about? -This is the hairdresser. 1303 01:04:34,691 --> 01:04:37,627 I gave you a big buildup. This girl could have her pick of any guy she wants. 1304 01:04:37,695 --> 01:04:39,129 - I said good things about you. - What'd you tell her? 1305 01:04:39,198 --> 01:04:42,133 I told her you were handsome, a good-looking guy; 1306 01:04:42,201 --> 01:04:45,136 that you're a great athlete; that you're gifted, bright. 1307 01:04:45,204 --> 01:04:48,139 - You didn't lie. - Would I lie? Of course not. 1308 01:04:48,207 --> 01:04:50,141 You told her I could fight? 1309 01:04:50,209 --> 01:04:52,143 I told her, but what touches her heart... 1310 01:04:52,211 --> 01:04:54,645 is that you want to be a farmer. 1311 01:04:54,713 --> 01:04:58,149 This is a girl that has a love of the soil, I promise you. 1312 01:04:58,217 --> 01:05:00,651 Onions. Onions. My brother's got an onion farm. 1313 01:05:00,719 --> 01:05:04,155 I wanna go back up there 'cause I wanna get the hell outta this city. 1314 01:05:04,223 --> 01:05:07,158 That's perfect! You mention onions to Linda, she goes crazy! 1315 01:05:07,226 --> 01:05:09,195 She goes nuts, you say "onion." 1316 01:05:10,562 --> 01:05:13,197 You say "onion" to Linda, the girl is just-- 1317 01:05:13,265 --> 01:05:15,132 All right, all right, all right, all right, all right. 1318 01:05:15,201 --> 01:05:18,135 That's her name? Linda? 1319 01:05:18,203 --> 01:05:22,139 Linda. It's a pretty name. What are you so, so, so standoffish-- 1320 01:05:22,207 --> 01:05:25,643 - Is that with an "E-R" or a "U-R"? - Is what with an "E-R" or-- 1321 01:05:25,711 --> 01:05:27,646 - "Linder"? - Linda. Linda with an "A." Linda. 1322 01:05:27,714 --> 01:05:29,648 - Oh. - She's a great kid. 1323 01:05:29,716 --> 01:05:31,650 And she's a substantial woman. 1324 01:05:31,718 --> 01:05:33,652 This is not a dumb girl. 1325 01:05:33,720 --> 01:05:37,656 This girl has got a PhD i-i-in... root and follicle culture. 1326 01:05:37,724 --> 01:05:40,659 - And she's pretty, right? - To die. She's to die. 1327 01:05:40,727 --> 01:05:43,161 'Cause that's important. 'Cause I've been stung. 1328 01:05:43,229 --> 01:05:46,164 The last girl I was with drove me up the wall, man. 1329 01:05:46,232 --> 01:05:49,929 - She made my stomach sick to the stomach. - Linda is church people. 1330 01:05:50,003 --> 01:05:52,437 - That's what I want. I want a church girl. - She's great. 1331 01:05:52,505 --> 01:05:55,441 I want a nice church girl; I don't want one of these fast New York sluts. 1332 01:05:55,509 --> 01:05:59,445 I want a nice, homely girl who likes to raise a family and dogs and that kind of thing. 1333 01:05:59,513 --> 01:06:02,778 Can I say two words to you? Can I say two words? 1334 01:06:02,850 --> 01:06:04,784 Butter churn. Okay? 1335 01:06:04,852 --> 01:06:07,286 Butter churn. This is a pioneer girl. 1336 01:06:07,354 --> 01:06:10,289 This is a girl who is practically, incidentally, a virgin. 1337 01:06:10,357 --> 01:06:12,222 What do you mean, "practically"? 1338 01:06:12,293 --> 01:06:15,730 I wanna level with you-- sh-she's slept with one or two guys in her life. 1339 01:06:15,797 --> 01:06:17,731 An old college professor... 1340 01:06:17,799 --> 01:06:19,733 a-a-and her childhood sweetheart. 1341 01:06:19,801 --> 01:06:22,736 But both of them were killed in combat for their nation. 1342 01:06:22,804 --> 01:06:25,739 - It's a sad story. - A professor got killed in combat? 1343 01:06:25,807 --> 01:06:27,741 Humanities regiment. 1344 01:06:27,809 --> 01:06:31,108 You know, they were the first ones to land at Anzio. I'm telling you-- 1345 01:06:31,179 --> 01:06:33,239 You said she was an actress? She's been in some films? 1346 01:06:33,316 --> 01:06:37,252 -She's had a couple of good roles, yeah. -She's ever been in anything I seen? 1347 01:06:37,320 --> 01:06:40,255 Hey-- You didn't see Schindler's List? 1348 01:06:40,323 --> 01:06:44,760 No, no, no-- T-That was-- That was-- That was the one with the Jews and, um-- 1349 01:06:44,827 --> 01:06:47,762 - Who were the bad guys? - The blond guys were the Nazis. 1350 01:06:47,830 --> 01:06:50,196 - They were tough motherfuckers. - Yeah, all right. 1351 01:06:50,266 --> 01:06:53,201 I'm telling you, this is a good girl. She's wonderful. 1352 01:06:53,269 --> 01:06:55,203 He's playing God. 1353 01:06:55,271 --> 01:06:57,705 It would be nice if he could bring this off. 1354 01:06:57,773 --> 01:06:59,206 It's hubris! 1355 01:06:59,275 --> 01:07:01,869 He spent a lot of time preparing her. 1356 01:07:38,615 --> 01:07:41,550 Listen, have you, uh-- 1357 01:07:41,618 --> 01:07:45,054 given any more thought to what we discussed? 1358 01:07:45,122 --> 01:07:47,056 Yeah. Yeah, I did. 1359 01:07:47,124 --> 01:07:52,061 I mean-- Look, the problem is, I don't know how I feel anymore; I'm confused. 1360 01:07:52,129 --> 01:07:54,064 - I-- - Listen, Amanda, I love you. 1361 01:07:54,132 --> 01:07:56,066 Yeah? 1362 01:07:56,134 --> 01:08:00,571 You're never gonna be able to forgive yourself if you don't give it a try. 1363 01:08:11,649 --> 01:08:13,583 Kevin. 1364 01:08:13,651 --> 01:08:16,087 This is Linda. Linda, this is, uh-- 1365 01:08:16,155 --> 01:08:18,089 This is Kevin. 1366 01:08:18,158 --> 01:08:20,092 - How you doin'? - Hi. 1367 01:08:22,661 --> 01:08:23,595 So-- 1368 01:08:25,432 --> 01:08:29,630 I'll go and-- I just wanted to bring you guys together, you know. 1369 01:08:31,070 --> 01:08:33,504 You know, you could maybe stick around, maybe. 1370 01:08:33,573 --> 01:08:35,507 You know, we could go out or somethin'. 1371 01:08:35,575 --> 01:08:38,510 - Yeah. - No, no. I'm completely superfluous. 1372 01:08:38,579 --> 01:08:40,513 Oh, you don't feel good? 1373 01:08:40,581 --> 01:08:43,015 No, I'm superfluous. I'm completely unnecessary. 1374 01:08:43,083 --> 01:08:48,520 You guys can have a great time and I'll-- I got stuff to do, you know. 1375 01:08:48,956 --> 01:08:51,517 - I got these for you. - What are these, daisies? 1376 01:08:51,593 --> 01:08:53,527 - Uh-- - That's great. 1377 01:08:53,595 --> 01:08:55,529 That's nice. 1378 01:08:55,597 --> 01:08:57,030 Yeah-- Ye-- Yeah. 1379 01:08:57,098 --> 01:08:59,532 I thought you said that he was a farmer. 1380 01:08:59,601 --> 01:09:01,762 Well, he is-- He's a farmer. 1381 01:09:01,837 --> 01:09:05,398 - I know they're not onions. - Daisies make me sneeze, Lenny. 1382 01:09:05,474 --> 01:09:08,409 Come here a minute. Excuse us one second. 1383 01:09:08,477 --> 01:09:11,412 They're beautiful flowers. Tell him they're beautiful and enjoy yourself. 1384 01:09:11,480 --> 01:09:14,415 - I could hold the flowers. - I know, but they just make me sneeze. 1385 01:09:14,483 --> 01:09:18,419 - She sneezes with flowers. That's good luck if you sneeze. - I'll hold the flowers. 1386 01:09:18,487 --> 01:09:20,923 - Thanks. - Go ahead, have fun. I'll see you guys. 1387 01:09:20,990 --> 01:09:22,924 I'm gonna go. 1388 01:09:22,992 --> 01:09:24,926 Take care. 1389 01:09:29,999 --> 01:09:32,433 So, y-- you're pretty. 1390 01:09:32,502 --> 01:09:34,936 Uh-- He's... tellin' the truth. 1391 01:09:35,004 --> 01:09:36,938 - You're really... - Oh. 1392 01:09:37,006 --> 01:09:37,940 pretty. 1393 01:09:38,008 --> 01:09:41,808 - Thanks. You're not so bad yourself. - Yeah, I know. 1394 01:09:41,879 --> 01:09:44,814 I bet you're hung like a horse. 1395 01:09:44,882 --> 01:09:46,816 - Yeah, I can ride a horse. - Yeah? 1396 01:09:46,884 --> 01:09:50,320 You know, my brother's got a farm, you know. I love animals. 1397 01:09:50,387 --> 01:09:54,324 I like animals. He's got a farm up there with the ducks and the pigs and, um-- 1398 01:09:54,392 --> 01:09:56,326 Oh, yeah. In Wisconsin. 1399 01:09:56,394 --> 01:09:58,328 Wampsville. 1400 01:11:19,918 --> 01:11:23,853 -I had sixteen fights,I won them all but twelve. -Oh, I am impressed. 1400 01:11:23,918 --> 01:11:26,853 Yeah. How long were you doin' hair? 1400 01:11:26,918 --> 01:11:29,853 I am just getting started now. 1401 01:11:29,924 --> 01:11:32,859 - That's right, 'cause you were doin' the acting, right? - Yeah. 1402 01:11:32,927 --> 01:11:36,363 - That's right. I didn't get to see Schindler's List. - Me neither. 1403 01:11:36,430 --> 01:11:39,866 But what were some of the other films you were in? 1404 01:11:39,934 --> 01:11:42,869 Well, I did The Enchanted, uh-- 1405 01:11:42,937 --> 01:11:45,872 - Salad. - The Enchanted Salad? 1406 01:11:45,940 --> 01:11:48,875 What was that about? Is it good? 1407 01:11:48,943 --> 01:11:51,878 Yeah, it was really good. It was about a waitress. 1408 01:11:51,946 --> 01:11:53,379 Yeah. 1409 01:11:54,882 --> 01:11:56,817 - I had a really good time with you tonight. - Did you? 1410 01:11:56,885 --> 01:11:58,819 - Yeah. - Really? Me too. 1411 01:11:58,887 --> 01:12:01,822 Yeah, you're really good at arcade games, you know. 1412 01:12:01,890 --> 01:12:04,825 Well, I used to date a pinball champ, not for nothing. 1412 01:12:04,890 --> 01:12:06,825 a pinball champ, was it like a serious relantionship. 1414 01:12:06,996 --> 01:12:10,932 Well, we were getting engaged, but then two guys strangled him. 1415 01:12:11,000 --> 01:12:12,934 Oh. 1416 01:12:14,704 --> 01:12:17,901 - You know what I like in a woman? - What? 1417 01:12:17,974 --> 01:12:21,410 I like, like, um, an old-fashioned girl, you know, 1418 01:12:21,477 --> 01:12:23,411 Iike my-my mom. 1419 01:12:23,479 --> 01:12:27,916 Like, a girl who likes to take care of the house and cook and clean... 1420 01:12:27,984 --> 01:12:31,921 and doesn't mind walkin' the dogs and doin' the lawn and that kind of thing. 1421 01:12:31,989 --> 01:12:35,288 You know what I mean? That's like my mom. 1422 01:12:35,359 --> 01:12:37,293 Yeah. 1423 01:12:37,361 --> 01:12:40,296 What do you like in a man? 1424 01:12:40,364 --> 01:12:43,299 I like a guy who has a good job, 1425 01:12:43,367 --> 01:12:46,302 who treats me nice and, um-- 1426 01:12:46,370 --> 01:12:48,804 Well, who's kinda built like you. 1427 01:12:48,872 --> 01:12:51,807 Doesn't have to stuff a sock in his jock to look good. 1428 01:12:51,875 --> 01:12:53,308 Mm-hmm. 1429 01:12:53,377 --> 01:12:56,813 - You know what my dream is? - What? 1430 01:12:58,916 --> 01:13:00,975 I'm in a field, right? 1431 01:13:01,051 --> 01:13:02,986 And, like, this hawk comes... 1432 01:13:03,054 --> 01:13:05,989 and picks me up in his beak, right? 1433 01:13:06,057 --> 01:13:10,187 And then flies me, like, all over the world so I see everything. 1434 01:13:10,261 --> 01:13:13,196 And then, like, he flies me out of the country... 1435 01:13:13,264 --> 01:13:16,700 and, like, we go up to the north pole and he drops me... 1436 01:13:16,768 --> 01:13:18,702 in the snow. 1437 01:13:18,770 --> 01:13:21,204 And I'm just layin' there... 1438 01:13:21,272 --> 01:13:23,206 naked. 1439 01:13:25,678 --> 01:13:27,612 What's your dream? 1440 01:13:29,348 --> 01:13:33,547 My dream is that somebody would come along and think that I was special, 1441 01:13:35,620 --> 01:13:39,557 that, you know-- that they'd wanna come and change my life for me. 1442 01:13:39,625 --> 01:13:41,559 That's my dream. 1443 01:13:42,762 --> 01:13:44,923 You could have that. 1444 01:13:44,997 --> 01:13:47,989 - You think? - Yeah, I think. 1445 01:13:48,067 --> 01:13:51,503 You could definitely have that, a pretty girl like you. 1446 01:13:53,874 --> 01:13:55,808 So, you think, um, 1447 01:13:55,876 --> 01:13:58,811 I'm gonna get to see you again, Linda, or what? 1448 01:13:58,879 --> 01:14:00,313 Do you want to? 1449 01:14:00,381 --> 01:14:02,576 A lot. 1450 01:14:02,650 --> 01:14:04,584 I want to a lot. 1451 01:14:06,387 --> 01:14:08,321 Me too. 1452 01:14:10,825 --> 01:14:13,794 True love. As refreshing as spring. 1453 01:14:13,861 --> 01:14:15,795 They kissed good night. 1454 01:14:15,863 --> 01:14:17,798 And saw each other the very next night, and the next. 1455 01:14:17,866 --> 01:14:20,801 Hold it, everybody. Something's coming in. 1456 01:14:20,869 --> 01:14:23,804 - A bulletin! - Uh-oh. Here comes Miss Party Pooper. 1457 01:14:23,872 --> 01:14:26,807 Tiresias, the blind seer of Thebes. 1458 01:14:26,875 --> 01:14:29,038 - I have a vision of him and Weinrib. - Where? 1459 01:14:29,112 --> 01:14:31,046 Wait. 1460 01:14:31,114 --> 01:14:33,082 The Acropolis. 1461 01:14:44,092 --> 01:14:46,026 Oh, Weinrib. 1462 01:14:46,094 --> 01:14:48,028 I saw your wife. 1463 01:14:48,096 --> 01:14:50,030 - Amanda. - You know me? 1464 01:14:50,098 --> 01:14:53,534 Yeah. I saw her. She was workin' late at the gallery. 1465 01:14:53,602 --> 01:14:56,537 And with her was this, uh, Jerry Bender guy. 1466 01:14:56,605 --> 01:14:58,540 Well, that's nothing. She works with Jerry Bender. Nothing unusual. 1467 01:14:58,608 --> 01:15:00,542 - You didn't let me finish. - Go on. 1468 01:15:00,610 --> 01:15:02,544 Uh, they spoke in intimate tones... 1469 01:15:02,612 --> 01:15:06,048 and then, uh, Bender rose and laid a big wet one on her. 1470 01:15:06,115 --> 01:15:09,050 - A big we-- Bender kissed Amanda? - That's what I'm tellin' ya. 1471 01:15:09,118 --> 01:15:12,554 Hey, you must've known somethin' was going on for a while, huh? 1472 01:15:12,622 --> 01:15:14,056 Yeah, I always thought that Bender had eyes for her. 1473 01:15:14,124 --> 01:15:16,058 Now he's got eyes and hands. 1474 01:15:16,126 --> 01:15:18,617 Jesus-- Well, Amanda didn't respond, did she? 1475 01:15:18,696 --> 01:15:22,223 No. She just opened her mouth very wide and stuck her tongue out... 1476 01:15:22,299 --> 01:15:25,860 as far as it was humanly possible to go. 1477 01:15:25,936 --> 01:15:27,870 Jeez-- Are you sure? 1478 01:15:27,938 --> 01:15:30,873 Well, hey-- Does the Trojan horse have a wooden dick? 1479 01:15:30,941 --> 01:15:34,377 - And then she, she pushed her abdomen against his. - All right, all right! 1480 01:15:34,445 --> 01:15:37,380 I got the picture! I knew it! I always suspected. 1481 01:15:37,448 --> 01:15:41,885 Ah, it's somethin' you don't wanna know, but you hadda be blind not to see it. 1482 01:15:41,952 --> 01:15:45,581 - Yeah. Oh, God. I'm gonna confront her. - Oh, no, not in front of Max! 1483 01:15:45,656 --> 01:15:49,524 No, Max-- Max has got a sleep-over date at his friend's house. 1484 01:15:49,593 --> 01:15:51,790 - Oh. - No. I knew it. Down deep, I knew it. 1485 01:15:51,863 --> 01:15:55,299 Uh, thanks, Weinrib. Thanks. 1486 01:15:55,367 --> 01:15:58,427 Ah, thank you. God bless you. 1487 01:15:58,503 --> 01:16:01,563 Oh, my God! It's more serious than we thought! 1488 01:16:01,640 --> 01:16:05,076 It's very serious. Her marriage to Lenny is in crisis. 1489 01:16:05,143 --> 01:16:08,477 With the passage of time, even the strongest bonds become fragile. 1490 01:16:08,547 --> 01:16:11,482 Great, fellas. It sounds like a fortune cookie. 1491 01:16:11,550 --> 01:16:13,677 O Zeus, most potent of gods! 1492 01:16:13,753 --> 01:16:16,688 We implore thee! We need your help! 1493 01:16:16,756 --> 01:16:20,692 Zeus! Great Zeus! Hear us! Hear us! 1494 01:16:20,760 --> 01:16:22,694 We call out to thee! 1495 01:16:22,762 --> 01:16:25,697 Um, this is Zeus. I'm not home right now. 1496 01:16:25,765 --> 01:16:29,462 But you can leave a message and I'll get back to you. 1497 01:16:29,535 --> 01:16:32,527 - Please start speaking at the tone. 1498 01:16:32,605 --> 01:16:35,132 Call us when you get in! We need help! 1499 01:16:35,208 --> 01:16:38,143 God, I think I should move out. 1500 01:16:38,211 --> 01:16:41,146 I-I-I can't understand this. Wh-Wh-- This is so radical. 1501 01:16:41,214 --> 01:16:43,648 No, 'cause I can't cheat. Jerry Bender's in love with me. 1502 01:16:43,717 --> 01:16:45,651 This is crazy. 1503 01:16:45,719 --> 01:16:48,655 Are you telling me you're in love with him, you're in love with Jerry Bender? 1504 01:16:48,723 --> 01:16:51,157 I don't know. I gotta find out. 1505 01:16:51,225 --> 01:16:54,160 - What do you mean, "you don't know"? - I don't know! 1506 01:16:54,228 --> 01:16:57,163 What do you mean? Are you in love with him or not? 1507 01:16:57,231 --> 01:17:00,166 Anyway, Lenny, let's face it-- things have changed between us. 1508 01:17:00,234 --> 01:17:03,169 But we can fix things. What about Max? Max-- 1509 01:17:03,237 --> 01:17:07,173 He'll be okay. Maybe it will be better for him with us apart... 1510 01:17:07,241 --> 01:17:10,677 - instead of together and arguing all of the time. - That's crazy. 1511 01:17:10,745 --> 01:17:12,679 I just think that's crazy. 1512 01:17:13,815 --> 01:17:15,749 Well, I-- I can't have this conversation. 1513 01:17:15,817 --> 01:17:17,251 I-- This is too crazy. I'm-- 1514 01:17:17,319 --> 01:17:20,254 - Where are you going? - I'm going out. I have to think. 1515 01:17:20,322 --> 01:17:23,189 I have to get my thoughts together. 1516 01:17:50,019 --> 01:17:53,182 - I been waitin' for you, man. - Kevin, leave me alone. 1517 01:17:53,255 --> 01:17:55,951 - I'm in a very, very bad mood. - You're in a very bad mood? 1518 01:17:56,025 --> 01:17:58,961 How could you do this? How could you set me up with this stupid girl? 1519 01:17:59,029 --> 01:18:02,965 - What are you talking about? - You didn't tell me she was a hooker... 1520 01:18:03,033 --> 01:18:04,969 and that she did porno films and had sex with hundreds and hundreds of men... 1521 01:18:05,037 --> 01:18:07,972 and women and who the hell knows what else! 1522 01:18:08,040 --> 01:18:09,974 - I thought it would prejudice you. - What? 1523 01:18:10,042 --> 01:18:11,976 How did you find out? 1524 01:18:12,044 --> 01:18:15,207 I-l call my friends up and I tell 'em I got this girl that I wanna marry. 1525 01:18:15,280 --> 01:18:19,808 They have me over for a few drinks and my friend Ray puts in this sexy video. 1526 01:18:19,885 --> 01:18:22,319 But I'm not really into pornography, you know. 1527 01:18:22,387 --> 01:18:26,153 - I look on the screen and this actress is up there: Judy Cum. 1528 01:18:26,224 --> 01:18:29,660 Kevin, I told you she had dramatic aspirations. 1529 01:18:29,728 --> 01:18:32,664 - I flew off the handle. - Oh, Christ. I thought you were a broad-minded guy. 1530 01:18:32,732 --> 01:18:37,169 I came over here and she confessed to everything, and then I-- and I hit her. 1531 01:18:37,236 --> 01:18:40,103 - You hit her? You hi-- - I was gonna break your neck, man! 1532 01:18:40,173 --> 01:18:43,609 - I don't believe this. You hit her? - I don't believe this! 1533 01:18:43,676 --> 01:18:46,611 - You hit her? For Christ's-- - A little bit. 1534 01:18:46,679 --> 01:18:50,115 - God. - I called my mother. I was upset, so then she says I should come home. 1535 01:18:50,183 --> 01:18:53,118 - So I'm gonna get the hell outta this place, man. - I don't understand you. 1536 01:18:53,186 --> 01:18:56,121 You're a broad-minded guy. People change. You gonna hold her past against her? 1537 01:18:56,189 --> 01:18:58,124 - Yeah, I'm gonna-- A porno star! - You love her, she loves you! 1538 01:18:58,192 --> 01:19:01,127 - What are you talking about? - Forget it, man. It's over. 1539 01:19:01,195 --> 01:19:04,130 I told you from day one the girl was not a virgin. 1540 01:19:04,198 --> 01:19:07,133 You didn't tell me how many times though! 1541 01:19:07,201 --> 01:19:09,135 - Thanks for nothin', Lenny, man. - Kevin! 1542 01:19:09,203 --> 01:19:11,137 Nah, man! 1543 01:19:23,450 --> 01:19:25,645 - He hit me. 1544 01:19:25,719 --> 01:19:28,745 I know, I-- I ran into him downstairs and he-- 1545 01:19:28,822 --> 01:19:31,757 Oh, Jesus, look at you. 1546 01:19:31,825 --> 01:19:33,759 God, does it feel terrible? 1547 01:19:33,827 --> 01:19:35,762 No, not really. Just my ulcer. 1548 01:19:35,830 --> 01:19:39,322 Your ulcer? Well, you know, you shouldn't be drinking. 1549 01:19:39,400 --> 01:19:42,836 - Hmm. - That's the worst-- Oh, God, look at that. 1550 01:19:42,904 --> 01:19:44,838 Boy. 1551 01:19:47,075 --> 01:19:50,511 - Remember you once said we were a couple of losers? - Yeah. 1552 01:19:50,578 --> 01:19:53,513 Well, I think that's definitely true. 1553 01:19:53,581 --> 01:19:56,516 - Why? What happened to you? 1554 01:19:58,553 --> 01:20:00,487 Amanda left me. 1555 01:20:00,555 --> 01:20:02,991 Oh. I'm sorry, Lenny. 1556 01:20:03,058 --> 01:20:05,492 Would you like a drink? 1557 01:20:05,561 --> 01:20:07,495 Mmm. No. 1558 01:20:58,847 --> 01:21:01,442 What's, uh-- What's-- What's the matter? 1559 01:21:03,019 --> 01:21:05,112 I-- I don't know. 1560 01:21:12,030 --> 01:21:14,965 Was she great? You can tell me. 1561 01:21:15,033 --> 01:21:16,967 Was she-- Was she great in bed? 1562 01:21:17,035 --> 01:21:20,971 - A woman with all that experience. - I don't know. 1563 01:21:21,039 --> 01:21:22,974 I just know that suddenly I really miss Amanda. 1564 01:21:23,042 --> 01:21:24,976 But wait! See who approaches! 1565 01:21:25,044 --> 01:21:27,478 There you are! Where have you been? 1566 01:21:27,547 --> 01:21:29,981 I've been looking for you all over. 1567 01:21:30,049 --> 01:21:33,746 I was just out drinking and thinking about everything. 1568 01:21:33,820 --> 01:21:35,754 Oh, Lenny, I'm sorry. 1569 01:21:35,822 --> 01:21:39,758 I, uh-- I was up all night thinking how much I hurt you... 1570 01:21:39,826 --> 01:21:42,761 and how much I'd messed us up for good, 1571 01:21:42,829 --> 01:21:44,764 and the thought of not being with you. 1572 01:21:44,832 --> 01:21:48,268 I love you. I don't love Jerry at all. 1573 01:21:48,335 --> 01:21:51,771 We have to put things right, whatever has to be done. 1574 01:22:05,354 --> 01:22:07,948 she drove upstate to Wampsville and pleaded with Kevin to take her back... 1575 01:22:08,924 --> 01:22:09,787 but to no avail. 1576 01:22:10,859 --> 01:22:14,795 Anyway, on the way home she was distraught and felt life held no hope... 1577 01:22:14,863 --> 01:22:18,458 when-- talk about a deus ex machina-- 1578 01:22:49,965 --> 01:22:53,901 So we just had a stabilizing problem and the thing got a little off balance. 1579 01:22:53,969 --> 01:22:57,905 And then the radio went glitchy, so I just need to get down and use a phone. 1580 01:22:57,973 --> 01:23:00,965 And thank you very much, by the way, for stopping. 1581 01:23:00,043 --> 01:23:02,978 My name's Don. 1582 01:23:06,350 --> 01:23:08,318 And so Linda married. 1583 01:23:08,385 --> 01:23:13,015 To a wonderful man who was not uptight and repressed and accepted her... 1584 01:23:13,090 --> 01:23:16,526 and even laughed at wild tales of her promiscuous background. 1585 01:23:16,593 --> 01:23:19,027 And so our little Greek drama comes to-- 1586 01:23:19,096 --> 01:23:21,030 Wait, wait, wait. There's more. 1587 01:23:21,098 --> 01:23:24,033 What more, Tiresias, blind seer of Thebes? 1588 01:23:24,101 --> 01:23:26,535 Tell 'em just to call me Tiresias, will ya? 1589 01:23:26,603 --> 01:23:28,503 The handicapped are always cranky. 1590 01:23:28,572 --> 01:23:32,008 On that night, Lenny Weinrib and Linda did make love, 1591 01:23:31,075 --> 01:23:34,010 Iike he was Zeus and she was Aphrodite with an aphrodisiac. 1592 01:23:34,078 --> 01:23:36,012 Get to the point! 1593 01:23:36,080 --> 01:23:39,311 - The point is, Linda did, that night, conceive a child. - No! 1594 01:23:39,384 --> 01:23:42,751 Yes. She became pregnant with Lenny's child. 1595 01:23:42,820 --> 01:23:47,280 But not wanting to complicate his life with Amanda, she never told him. 1596 01:23:47,358 --> 01:23:50,293 Instead she went off with her new husband, 1597 01:23:50,361 --> 01:23:54,855 who stood behind her loyally as she gave birth to a beautiful baby girl. 1598 01:23:54,932 --> 01:23:56,866 Lenny never saw Linda again. 1599 01:24:03,943 --> 01:24:05,379 We can look around the whole store if you'd like. 1600 01:24:09,449 --> 01:24:11,542 - Lenny! - I don't believe this! Wh-- 1601 01:24:11,618 --> 01:24:14,212 - Hi. - What are you doing here? 1602 01:24:14,287 --> 01:24:16,721 - I-I-- - I'm stunned! What happened to you? 1603 01:24:16,790 --> 01:24:18,724 I-I'm living in Connecticut. 1604 01:24:18,792 --> 01:24:21,727 I'm married and my husband Don is a helicopter pilot. 1605 01:24:21,795 --> 01:24:25,231 You're kidding! Where did you go? I searched every place for you. 1606 01:24:25,298 --> 01:24:28,234 - It's like you vanished off the face of the earth. - Well, we had our moment. 1607 01:24:28,302 --> 01:24:32,238 - But I knew you would be back with Amanda. - I can't b-- That's super. 1608 01:24:32,306 --> 01:24:35,798 - S-So y-you're married and-- This is yours? - Yes! Look at her. 1609 01:24:35,876 --> 01:24:39,073 Oh, God, she's adorable. 1610 01:24:39,146 --> 01:24:42,239 - She's adorable. Very, very-- 1611 01:24:42,315 --> 01:24:44,250 - And is-- Is that Max? - This is Max. This is Max. 1612 01:24:44,318 --> 01:24:46,752 - Hello. - Max, say hello. This is a friend. 1613 01:24:46,821 --> 01:24:48,755 - Hi, I'm Linda. - How do you do? 1614 01:24:48,823 --> 01:24:51,917 What a handsome boy. Amanda must be very beautiful. 1615 01:24:51,992 --> 01:24:55,428 And she's-- You've gotta have a very handsome husband, 1616 01:24:55,496 --> 01:24:57,430 'cause she has a great face. 1617 01:24:57,498 --> 01:25:00,433 I'm stunned. I don't know what to say. I'm, I'm-- 1618 01:25:00,501 --> 01:25:04,437 - Lenny, it's so great to see you. - You too. You're okay? Everything-- 1619 01:25:04,505 --> 01:25:06,939 Yeah. I'm really good. 1620 01:25:07,007 --> 01:25:08,941 Thank you for everything. 1621 01:25:09,009 --> 01:25:10,943 Oh-- I-I-- I'm speechless. 1622 01:25:11,011 --> 01:25:13,447 I-I-- I gotta go. I'm sorry. I'm gonna be late. 1623 01:25:13,515 --> 01:25:17,781 - It was great to see you. - It was great to see you. Great. 1624 01:25:17,853 --> 01:25:20,788 - But they have each other's child. 1625 01:25:20,856 --> 01:25:22,790 And they don't know. 1626 01:25:22,858 --> 01:25:25,725 Yes. Yes. Isn't life ironic? 1627 01:25:25,794 --> 01:25:27,728 Life is unbelievable. 1628 01:25:27,796 --> 01:25:31,493 Miraculous. Sad. Wonderful. 1629 01:25:31,566 --> 01:25:33,864 Yes, this is all true! 1630 01:25:33,935 --> 01:25:35,960 And that's why we say: