1
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In the year of Our Lord 1 123,

2
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King Louis vl, known as "The Fat",
waged war against his cousin,

3
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Henry l, King of England
and Duke of Normandy.

4
00:00:13,900 --> 00:00:16,200
Many brave knights fought beside him.

5
00:00:16,700 --> 00:00:20,800
They believed in God
and the forces of Evil.

6
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Your Majesty,

7
00:00:29,200 --> 00:00:30,600
time is of the essence.

8
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Need I remind you
we are in their camp?

9
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silence, Montmirail.
Love knows not haste!

10
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sire Godefroy!

11
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The English!

12
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My vassal sees

13
00:00:52,100 --> 00:00:53,300
horsemen approaching.

14
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We are coming.

15
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I beg of you, Your Majesty,
make haste!

16
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Adieu, my sweet.
I must join my men.

17
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Will I see you soon?

18
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When my cousin,
the King of England, makes amends.

19
00:01:07,800 --> 00:01:09,600
Do you love me, Kathleen?

20
00:01:11,600 --> 00:01:13,900
Then accord me one last favor,
should I die.

21
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- Hush hush...
- show me your ankles.

22
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I beseech thee, lady-love.

23
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Higher. Up to your knees.

24
00:01:35,100 --> 00:01:37,900
My God! How beautiful!

25
00:01:39,600 --> 00:01:40,400
sire...

26
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they're coming.

27
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Come, sire.

28
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THE vIsITORs

29
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This way.

30
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King! I capture thee!

31
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Let me, my King!

32
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Liar!
The King is never captured.

33
00:03:10,600 --> 00:03:11,800
Not even in chess.

34
00:03:17,500 --> 00:03:18,800
Toil! Never recoil!

35
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sound the horns! The King!

36
00:04:26,600 --> 00:04:28,200
Master! You're alive!

37
00:04:28,600 --> 00:04:29,500
God be praised!

38
00:04:29,700 --> 00:04:32,200
I managed to save
your horse and your arms.

39
00:04:32,400 --> 00:04:34,300
You managed to flee, as usual.

40
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Castrated clod!

41
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sire Godefroy,
The King summons you.

42
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Castrated clod!

43
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sires... the King!

44
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My kind knight Godefroy

45
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merits indeed
his name "The Hardy".

46
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His baldrick was nary stuckolded.

47
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With his sword,

48
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he yslaked a scurvy English head.

49
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Godefroy Amaury de Malfete,

50
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Count of Montmirail,
of Apremont, and of Popincourt

51
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I shall thus reward your valor.

52
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sire, I am your eternal servant.

53
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I know you desire descendants.

54
00:05:11,700 --> 00:05:14,800
You have one week to fetch

55
00:05:14,900 --> 00:05:16,900
one of the fairest
Wenches in the Kingdom:

56
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the daughter of the Duke of Puglia.
I know you adore her.

57
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she is yours to wed.

58
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How can I thank thee?

59
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To serve my King is my Honor.

60
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Long live the King!

61
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Long live the King!

62
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Long live the King!

63
00:05:31,900 --> 00:05:33,900
- Who is he?
- Jacquasse the Crass.

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My vassal.
He should be waiting outside.

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He lacks grace, but he sniffs out
a trail like a good hound.

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We must avoid the Forest of Malcombe,
and pass by Montargis.

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Avoid the forest?

68
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You know it's haunted, sire.
No one dares penetrate it.

69
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Hogwash!

70
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My betrothed must not wait!

71
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What about the witch of Malcombe?

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Ride ahead of The Crass.

73
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she can turn an army into frog vomit.

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At her touch, your skin spits pus.

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and you pisseth mud.

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she can damn 7 generations.

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We're doomed!

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Doomed!

79
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Per Ansia

80
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Queribus Memorium

81
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"Halt or becometh a slug."

82
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It's Latin and visigoth.

83
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The Devil's drool!

84
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A Black sabbath.
Let's splitteth!

85
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What does she want?

86
00:07:37,100 --> 00:07:39,800
To make that old hag
young again. It's impossible!

87
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Drink! Drink!

88
00:07:58,800 --> 00:08:00,200
Where is she?

89
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Fear not.
she'll drop back in.

90
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What a blast to have
a virgin's unpolluted body again!

91
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she's plug-ugly!

92
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Just like the day I married her!

93
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It's devildom!

94
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surrender, she-Devil!

95
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We'll dismember her

96
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and slice out her tongue.

97
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Let rats gnaw on her innards.

98
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No lady is tortured on my lands.

99
00:08:53,100 --> 00:08:54,000
Just burn her.

100
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Thank you, sire.

101
00:08:56,100 --> 00:08:58,000
Thank you. You are too good!

102
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At last... my castle.

103
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Unpack our best apparels

104
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to honor my beloved.

105
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Jacquasse, help me change.

106
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Yes, sire.

107
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I have no fine apparels.

108
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she won't even see you.

109
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My shoes and my fanciest shell.

110
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Ganelon, sound the horn
to announce my arrival.

111
00:09:28,400 --> 00:09:30,100
How thrilled am l, sire Fulbert,

112
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that my son weddeth your sweet

113
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and gentle daughter.

114
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I wanted her to weddeth a Duke,

115
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but our Fat King decided otherwise.

116
00:09:39,800 --> 00:09:40,900
Cursed be love.

117
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More wine!
Let me piss a-plenty!

118
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Father, you promised
nary to burp for my marriage.

119
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The Count of Montmirail!

120
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Frenegonde! where are you going?
Frenegonde! Come back!

121
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Come back this instant!

122
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Frenegonde! Come back!

123
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No Duke's daughter runs after

124
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a mere Count.

125
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You look good and gentle.

126
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And mighty uncomfortable.

127
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Why?

128
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Zounds!
The flask falleth all alone.

129
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Give it to me.
My thirst needs a-quenching!

130
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The castle!

131
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Holy scrotums!

132
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It swelleth like a blowfish!

133
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It's wearing a wig!

134
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sire Godefroy, are you not well?

135
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By what devil-craft?

136
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What's wrong?

137
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Come back, you wicked wench!

138
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Come back!

139
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Come back, you foul slut!

140
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God shield!
A bear is chasing her!

141
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My crossbow!

142
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Come back!

143
00:11:38,500 --> 00:11:40,000
There's no bear.

144
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steer clear, beloved!
steer clear!

145
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Father!

146
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I saw a huge beast.

147
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I'll spend my life in a convent,
faithful to you.

148
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I can ne'er wed
the man who killed my father.

149
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I understand, my betrothed.

150
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I'll be faithful too.

151
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I shall ne'er marry...

152
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ne'er have descendants.

153
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Don't do me any favors.

154
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What are you up to?

155
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I Was praying for his saIvation.

156
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Where is my father's wizard?

157
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Eusaebius?

158
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I found him.

159
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He lives yonder,
not far from here.

160
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But they say he's senile.

161
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I can make your Duke live again.

162
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But you must know
no fear.

163
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Only God can do that!

164
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You are right.
Only God can bring back the dead.

165
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But there is another way.

166
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Time is a mountain,
pierced by many hidden tunnels.

167
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My magic spells can
give you access to them.

168
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Meet Angueran.

169
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scarface Angueran.
At your service.

170
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And my loyal Ganelon.

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You shall return

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just before the Duke's death.

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If you find
enough force in yourself...

174
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you will be able
to change the course of the arrow.

175
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You'll wed your betrothed,

176
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and have the lineage you desire.

177
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It's sheer lunacy!

178
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Where is my powder of leech?

179
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I haven't done this in ages.
I'm a bit rusty.

180
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He's senile!

181
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Here it is.

182
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If you fear not,

183
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Godefroy the Hardy, drink.

184
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You'll arrive in the forest
just before the accident.

185
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Don't trust the old fool!

186
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If sire Godefroy doesn't return,
We'll lock you in his dungeon

187
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With your Book of spells.

188
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Trust me.

189
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Don't drink it, sire.
You'll turn into a frog,

190
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or a bat, or a goat,
or a nun's ass.

191
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Perhaps you're right.

192
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Drink first.

193
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Me?

194
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I'll see if you

195
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turn into a nun's ass.

196
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If you do, I'll seek revenge.

197
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Drink!

198
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so, my Crass?

199
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It tastes like pig excrement.

200
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Candied concoctions
are for evil sorcerers.

201
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Drink hastily.
I must say the incantation.

202
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If I drank...

203
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am I going too?

204
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say the incantation.

205
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They've gone into
the Tunnels of Time!

206
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What's that noise?

207
00:17:07,600 --> 00:17:08,500
What did you step on?

208
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Rotten eggs.

209
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I forgot the quail eggs.

210
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What a catastrophe!

211
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stand up, peasant.

212
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Where are We?

213
00:18:03,900 --> 00:18:04,800
And our friends?

214
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This isn't my Forest.

215
00:18:06,900 --> 00:18:08,400
The wizard misled us!

216
00:18:09,400 --> 00:18:11,400
We have tWo legs, sire.
And tWo arms.

217
00:18:11,600 --> 00:18:13,600
'Tis miracle enough.

218
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Fetch me a horse.
Make haste!

219
00:19:01,700 --> 00:19:03,800
Pugh! It stinketh!

220
00:19:15,900 --> 00:19:16,700
He's crazy!

221
00:19:20,500 --> 00:19:23,300
sire! A Moor!

222
00:19:34,000 --> 00:19:35,900
A Moor in the Devil's chariot!

223
00:19:36,000 --> 00:19:38,100
'Tis metal,
With no oxen to pull it!

224
00:19:38,500 --> 00:19:39,800
sire, come see!

225
00:19:44,400 --> 00:19:46,800
Thither, sire! Thither!

226
00:19:50,700 --> 00:19:51,700
They're psychos.

227
00:19:53,200 --> 00:19:54,100
They're psychos.

228
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Psychos!

229
00:20:39,200 --> 00:20:40,700
Whose shield is this?

230
00:20:41,700 --> 00:20:44,100
Lord our Father, We have sinned.

231
00:20:44,700 --> 00:20:46,000
We'll bear this ordeal

232
00:20:46,600 --> 00:20:47,500
to the end.

233
00:20:47,900 --> 00:20:49,900
Give us the courage never to recoil.

234
00:20:50,000 --> 00:20:51,400
We Will obey Thee.

235
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Amen.

236
00:21:06,300 --> 00:21:08,700
It stinketh.
We can't breathe! We're doomed!

237
00:21:08,800 --> 00:21:10,600
No, I smell victuals.

238
00:21:13,200 --> 00:21:15,300
More diabolic chariots!

239
00:21:15,400 --> 00:21:16,900
Let's stay in the Forest.

240
00:21:17,000 --> 00:21:17,600
No!

241
00:21:17,800 --> 00:21:19,900
We can't fight on an empty belly.

242
00:21:20,900 --> 00:21:21,700
Two burgers!

243
00:21:22,500 --> 00:21:24,800
French fries and ketchup!

244
00:21:40,800 --> 00:21:41,900
Yo guys!

245
00:21:42,100 --> 00:21:43,300
Is it Halloween?

246
00:21:43,800 --> 00:21:46,000
You're dressed to go trick or treating!

247
00:21:46,200 --> 00:21:47,400
silence, strumpet.

248
00:21:47,600 --> 00:21:50,000
Take this and go your way.

249
00:21:52,000 --> 00:21:52,900
Leave us be.

250
00:21:53,200 --> 00:21:55,600
Holy Moses!

251
00:21:55,700 --> 00:21:57,600
Are you Tv stars?

252
00:21:57,700 --> 00:21:59,300
shove off! shove off!

253
00:21:59,500 --> 00:22:01,600
I don't want to impose,
Ladies and Gents,

254
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but since you're in show-biz,
do you know any... big-time agents?

255
00:22:08,800 --> 00:22:10,600
Quiet, peasant,
or I'll smacketh you.

256
00:22:10,700 --> 00:22:13,500
It just so happens
I studied song and dance.

257
00:22:13,700 --> 00:22:15,600
If you could get me an audition,

258
00:22:16,100 --> 00:22:17,400
it'd change my life.

259
00:22:18,300 --> 00:22:22,100
What's wrong?
I'm no Worse than Madonna!

260
00:22:22,700 --> 00:22:24,900
Let us leave this vile baWd.

261
00:22:26,400 --> 00:22:27,900
Listen...

262
00:22:38,300 --> 00:22:42,600
still hanging around, sticky fingers?
Give back the steaks!

263
00:22:43,100 --> 00:22:46,300
Watch out!
I'm a political refugee!

264
00:22:46,500 --> 00:22:48,900
I'm sick of your shenanigans!

265
00:22:49,900 --> 00:22:51,200
Ho! lnnkeeper!

266
00:22:51,300 --> 00:22:53,100
You hit the fairer sex?

267
00:22:53,600 --> 00:22:57,200
What the hell do
these two clowns want?

268
00:22:57,200 --> 00:22:58,800
This isn't a hobo hideout!

269
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I am Godefroy of Montmirail,
Count of Apremont

270
00:23:01,300 --> 00:23:04,000
and of Popincourt.
And I lord over my property.

271
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Mr. vautrot! Help!

272
00:23:07,900 --> 00:23:11,200
Call the cops!
The bag lady's bothering Roger again!

273
00:23:13,400 --> 00:23:14,200
Murderer!

274
00:23:15,100 --> 00:23:17,400
Come on, toots!
This guy is gun crazy!

275
00:23:17,800 --> 00:23:18,600
Attack, sire!

276
00:23:19,200 --> 00:23:20,900
On your knees, punk!

277
00:23:21,000 --> 00:23:23,300
Montjoie! st. Denis!

278
00:23:27,700 --> 00:23:29,400
Jacquasse! My Jacquasse!

279
00:23:36,500 --> 00:23:38,400
Easy does it, hot stuff.

280
00:23:38,500 --> 00:23:39,500
Attack!

281
00:23:44,100 --> 00:23:45,900
Montjoie!

282
00:23:46,200 --> 00:23:47,600
Montjoie!

283
00:24:05,600 --> 00:24:07,100
Asylum!

284
00:24:07,200 --> 00:24:07,900
Asylum!

285
00:24:09,800 --> 00:24:11,700
Father, I beseech
the right to asylum.

286
00:24:12,600 --> 00:24:14,900
Mi... Mi, honey.

287
00:24:15,000 --> 00:24:17,500
That's it.

288
00:24:18,300 --> 00:24:21,000
Keep on practicing, love.
I'll be right back.

289
00:24:23,800 --> 00:24:25,800
Hello, Countess? It's Father Herve.

290
00:24:25,900 --> 00:24:26,800
Hello, Father.

291
00:24:26,900 --> 00:24:30,200
Yes, well...
My mass was interrupted...

292
00:24:30,300 --> 00:24:33,900
by a hooligan
dressed in a very peculiar way.

293
00:24:34,000 --> 00:24:37,800
He claims to be
the Count of Montmirail etc, etc...

294
00:24:37,800 --> 00:24:40,600
Quite frankly, he seems off his rocker.

295
00:24:40,700 --> 00:24:44,000
The Count of Montmirail?
Daddy died in '81 .

296
00:24:44,000 --> 00:24:48,600
I know, Beatrice. I buried him. This one
claims to be called "The Hardy".

297
00:24:48,600 --> 00:24:50,800
He has your family arms on his tunic.

298
00:24:51,100 --> 00:24:52,800
Godefroy the Hardy?
How absurd.

299
00:24:53,900 --> 00:24:54,700
Come quickly.

300
00:24:55,900 --> 00:24:57,100
He looks ornery.

301
00:24:57,300 --> 00:25:00,900
Hello? Hello?...
Father Herve?

302
00:25:06,400 --> 00:25:08,200
What is this?

303
00:25:08,900 --> 00:25:10,800
It's the UNICEF calendar.

304
00:25:15,300 --> 00:25:15,900
Hurry!

305
00:25:16,700 --> 00:25:21,500
He's busy praying. He saw today's date
and went into a state of shock.

306
00:25:21,600 --> 00:25:24,000
He claims to be born in 1 076.

307
00:25:24,100 --> 00:25:25,400
He's a crackpot.

308
00:25:29,800 --> 00:25:30,600
My betrothed.

309
00:25:32,200 --> 00:25:33,700
My betrothed.

310
00:25:34,900 --> 00:25:36,600
You are here?

311
00:25:36,700 --> 00:25:39,400
Frenegonde!
My beautiful Frenegonde!

312
00:25:40,500 --> 00:25:42,300
stop!
That totally hurts!

313
00:25:42,400 --> 00:25:44,200
Calm down, you brute!

314
00:25:44,300 --> 00:25:44,900
It is l.

315
00:25:45,100 --> 00:25:46,600
stop. I don't know you.

316
00:25:46,700 --> 00:25:47,400
Frenegonde.

317
00:25:48,200 --> 00:25:51,000
The Countess doesn't know you.

318
00:25:51,200 --> 00:25:52,300
You've made a mistake.

319
00:25:52,500 --> 00:25:54,600
Cease, Father.

320
00:25:56,000 --> 00:25:58,200
Dare I understand?

321
00:26:00,000 --> 00:26:01,900
This fair dame is not my beloved,

322
00:26:02,500 --> 00:26:04,300
but my descendant.

323
00:26:09,600 --> 00:26:10,900
1 000 years betwixt us.

324
00:26:11,000 --> 00:26:14,700
Yes. I have to go.
I don't know him from Adam.

325
00:26:15,200 --> 00:26:17,300
I'm from the time of Louis vl.
Help me.

326
00:26:17,400 --> 00:26:18,600
shall I call for help?

327
00:26:18,800 --> 00:26:21,400
No, this very nice man
Won't harm us.

328
00:26:22,000 --> 00:26:23,400
Will 50 francs do?

329
00:26:23,500 --> 00:26:25,400
I must return to my time.

330
00:26:25,600 --> 00:26:26,800
Know'st thou a wizard?

331
00:26:27,000 --> 00:26:30,300
No. sorry, no wizard.
I know the wizard of Oz.

332
00:26:30,600 --> 00:26:32,500
Where is this "Oz"?

333
00:26:32,900 --> 00:26:35,600
Don't budge.
We'll take care of you.

334
00:26:44,600 --> 00:26:46,600
Thank you, my sweet.

335
00:26:47,300 --> 00:26:48,100
It's a miracle.

336
00:26:48,200 --> 00:26:50,200
Okay, call the police.

337
00:26:52,700 --> 00:26:55,000
- It's not very Christian.
- Of course it is.

338
00:26:58,000 --> 00:26:59,000
Pugh! How ugly!

339
00:26:59,200 --> 00:27:01,700
Without them,
We couldn't Watch Tv. Here...

340
00:27:01,900 --> 00:27:03,400
Just what the doc ordered.

341
00:27:05,600 --> 00:27:08,300
Thanks, bawd. You're ugly as sin,
but good-hearted.

342
00:27:08,300 --> 00:27:09,400
Ever see your nose?

343
00:27:10,600 --> 00:27:13,000
When you sneeze,
is it typhoon season?

344
00:27:13,200 --> 00:27:15,700
Your wine is fruity,
but a tad watery.

345
00:27:15,800 --> 00:27:17,900
The wine's mine, swine.

346
00:27:22,300 --> 00:27:25,700
What a raunchy eater!
You eat the plastic too?

347
00:27:28,600 --> 00:27:30,100
The wizard was senile.

348
00:27:30,400 --> 00:27:32,300
If I catch him,
I'll skin him alive.

349
00:27:32,500 --> 00:27:34,500
Don't take it so bad.

350
00:27:34,900 --> 00:27:36,800
Those pigs aIways get us.

351
00:27:36,900 --> 00:27:38,500
Is your buddy a wrestler?

352
00:27:38,800 --> 00:27:39,900
I saw him on Tv.

353
00:27:41,100 --> 00:27:42,900
I wanted to be a singer...

354
00:27:43,000 --> 00:27:45,200
but they're all
full of shit in show-biz.

355
00:27:47,100 --> 00:27:48,100
My sire is a warrior,

356
00:27:48,400 --> 00:27:51,400
a trusted aide of our King.
The Count of Montmirail.

357
00:27:51,400 --> 00:27:52,600
Montmirail?

358
00:27:52,800 --> 00:27:54,200
The dentist's old lady?

359
00:27:54,400 --> 00:27:56,000
He couldn't marry her!

360
00:27:56,100 --> 00:27:57,800
That's why we're here.

361
00:27:58,000 --> 00:27:59,200
They're not married?

362
00:28:00,000 --> 00:28:02,700
No kidding!
The nerve of that prude!

363
00:28:02,800 --> 00:28:05,500
she acts so holier-than-thou
at the rummage sale.

364
00:28:05,500 --> 00:28:06,200
What a bitch!

365
00:28:10,900 --> 00:28:12,100
You came so fast.

366
00:28:12,200 --> 00:28:14,900
squadron sergeant-Major Gibon.
At your service, Countess.

367
00:28:15,000 --> 00:28:16,700
I brought the National Guard.

368
00:28:16,900 --> 00:28:18,000
Where's the offender?

369
00:28:18,100 --> 00:28:20,300
My stars!
Your squadron is quite impressive.

370
00:28:20,500 --> 00:28:23,400
He's a bit brutal, but he's just
a poor homeless person.

371
00:28:23,500 --> 00:28:24,700
They're back-up.

372
00:28:24,800 --> 00:28:26,500
This is Doctor Bauvin.

373
00:28:28,100 --> 00:28:30,400
First we'll talk to him.
size up the beast.

374
00:28:30,500 --> 00:28:33,400
Let's go, Bauvin.

375
00:28:34,900 --> 00:28:35,600
Good luck!

376
00:28:43,300 --> 00:28:44,100
Where is she?

377
00:28:44,200 --> 00:28:46,300
Enough!
ldentity papers! Green card!

378
00:28:46,500 --> 00:28:48,300
Psychology, sergeant-Major.

379
00:28:48,500 --> 00:28:50,800
Hello there.
Are you from around here?

380
00:28:50,900 --> 00:28:52,300
Bow down before me,

381
00:28:52,400 --> 00:28:53,500
and I shall be clement.

382
00:28:53,700 --> 00:28:56,100
Why the costume?
Are you an actor?

383
00:28:56,200 --> 00:28:57,200
Is this for Tv?

384
00:28:59,100 --> 00:29:01,200
Candid Camera?
should I smile?

385
00:29:01,700 --> 00:29:03,700
Where is my descendant?
Answer or die!

386
00:29:03,900 --> 00:29:06,700
Let me, sergeant-Major.
He's a sicko!

387
00:29:06,700 --> 00:29:09,600
A little shot
and you'll be good as new.

388
00:29:09,700 --> 00:29:11,900
Give me your arm.

389
00:29:18,700 --> 00:29:21,900
Officer, send in
your men on the double!

390
00:29:22,000 --> 00:29:24,700
He's a maniac!
He took the doctor hostage!

391
00:29:40,900 --> 00:29:42,800
Thanks for coming!

392
00:29:49,200 --> 00:29:51,400
Montjoie! st. Denis!

393
00:29:55,600 --> 00:29:57,200
Toil, toil! Never recoil!

394
00:30:04,400 --> 00:30:07,900
I have a horrible doubt. This tramp
just may be part of my family.

395
00:30:08,000 --> 00:30:08,600
What?

396
00:30:08,800 --> 00:30:11,300
"Montjoie" is the battle cry
of French knights.

397
00:30:13,000 --> 00:30:16,900
"Toil! Never recoil!"
is the motto of Godefroy the Hardy.

398
00:30:17,000 --> 00:30:18,500
It's my family's motto.

399
00:30:18,600 --> 00:30:20,300
Now you have doubts?

400
00:30:20,900 --> 00:30:22,200
He's calmed doWn.

401
00:30:22,400 --> 00:30:25,600
Hold him down.
I'll put him to sleep.

402
00:30:34,800 --> 00:30:36,900
No, my mistake!
I never saw him before.

403
00:30:37,500 --> 00:30:39,300
It can't hurt.
I killed the nerve.

404
00:30:39,600 --> 00:30:40,800
Jean-Pierre, come here.

405
00:30:40,900 --> 00:30:42,000
Excuse me, ma'am.

406
00:30:42,300 --> 00:30:43,700
I'll just be a minute.

407
00:30:45,300 --> 00:30:47,500
Do you remember my cousin Hubert?

408
00:30:47,600 --> 00:30:49,300
Martha's son. Naval Academy.

409
00:30:49,400 --> 00:30:51,500
The race car driver?
I never met him.

410
00:30:51,600 --> 00:30:54,800
Obviously. He disappeared
in Borneo before our marriage.

411
00:30:54,900 --> 00:30:56,500
- I think he's alive.
- What?

412
00:30:56,600 --> 00:30:59,100
As wacky as it sounds,
today's Tarzan...

413
00:30:59,200 --> 00:31:01,300
is probably Hubert.
He's totally changed.

414
00:31:01,400 --> 00:31:02,700
You said he was a bum.

415
00:31:02,800 --> 00:31:04,300
He had family air.

416
00:31:04,500 --> 00:31:07,500
The sensual nose,
the large forehead...

417
00:31:07,500 --> 00:31:10,700
You meet a derelict
With a shiny red schnozz, and noW...

418
00:31:10,900 --> 00:31:12,700
he's a long-lost sensual cousin!

419
00:31:12,800 --> 00:31:14,400
A cousin with our arms!

420
00:31:14,500 --> 00:31:16,400
Don't just stand there.
Come look.

421
00:31:18,800 --> 00:31:20,800
Look. The Montmirail family album.

422
00:31:21,500 --> 00:31:23,400
Here's our first Count,
Godefroy The Hardy.

423
00:31:23,500 --> 00:31:25,300
It's the same nose and forehead.

424
00:31:25,600 --> 00:31:28,700
That's a 900-year old drawing.
What's the link with Hubert?

425
00:31:28,800 --> 00:31:31,700
I'll call the castle.
When Hubert was 1 9,

426
00:31:31,700 --> 00:31:33,900
he posed for the last
family portrait.

427
00:31:34,000 --> 00:31:35,500
A wild-goose chase!

428
00:31:44,100 --> 00:31:46,300
Beatrice Goulard de Montmirail
for Mr. Jacquart.

429
00:31:46,400 --> 00:31:48,800
Hello, Countess. It's Frederick.

430
00:31:48,900 --> 00:31:50,500
Fred, is Jacques-Henri there?

431
00:31:50,600 --> 00:31:53,800
One minute. A word of warning:
he's repairing the boiler.

432
00:31:53,800 --> 00:31:54,700
He's on edge.

433
00:31:54,900 --> 00:31:55,700
Jacques-Henri!

434
00:31:57,200 --> 00:31:59,000
Why did you jerk
the lever so violently?

435
00:31:59,100 --> 00:32:00,200
You asked me to.

436
00:32:00,300 --> 00:32:01,600
spare me.

437
00:32:01,800 --> 00:32:04,100
My stunning vest
is now a filthy rag.

438
00:32:04,100 --> 00:32:05,400
Jacques-Henri!

439
00:32:05,600 --> 00:32:07,400
Why are you shouting?

440
00:32:07,500 --> 00:32:08,600
Beatrice de Montmirail.

441
00:32:08,700 --> 00:32:10,200
What a ball-buster.

442
00:32:10,400 --> 00:32:11,200
Jacquart?

443
00:32:11,400 --> 00:32:12,600
Jacquart?

444
00:32:12,800 --> 00:32:13,400
Yes?

445
00:32:13,600 --> 00:32:14,900
Boiler trouble?

446
00:32:15,100 --> 00:32:16,300
The burner is ruined.

447
00:32:16,400 --> 00:32:18,300
Jean-Francois yanked on the lever.

448
00:32:18,400 --> 00:32:19,600
Oil spurt out.

449
00:32:19,800 --> 00:32:22,700
I was nearly disfigured.
Not to mention my jacket.

450
00:32:23,200 --> 00:32:24,700
No one is of any help.

451
00:32:26,000 --> 00:32:27,200
At least no one died.

452
00:32:27,300 --> 00:32:28,300
Thank God.

453
00:32:28,500 --> 00:32:29,500
I have a problem too.

454
00:32:29,700 --> 00:32:31,100
Can I ask you a favor?

455
00:32:32,800 --> 00:32:35,800
Go upstairs to the Gallery.
In our last family portrait...

456
00:32:35,900 --> 00:32:38,100
there's a Royal Navy cadet.

457
00:32:38,200 --> 00:32:41,900
second row. The kepi with a feather.
Do you have a Pola?

458
00:32:41,900 --> 00:32:42,500
A what?

459
00:32:42,700 --> 00:32:45,900
A Polaroid, Jacques.
The children threw ours in the toilet.

460
00:32:46,200 --> 00:32:49,400
We have no "Pola". And my name
is Jacques-Henri, not Jacques.

461
00:32:49,400 --> 00:32:54,100
Try to understand, Jacquart/
my cousin is in an insane asylum

462
00:32:54,100 --> 00:32:55,000
by accident.

463
00:32:55,100 --> 00:32:56,500
I can't help your cousin.

464
00:32:56,800 --> 00:32:57,500
We're busy.

465
00:32:58,900 --> 00:33:02,000
The Bernay and Bernay Bank
is here for a seminar.

466
00:33:02,100 --> 00:33:04,300
Edgar Bernay will be
bathing in cold water.

467
00:33:04,400 --> 00:33:07,600
so, even if I had a "Pola",
I wouldn't take your picture.

468
00:33:08,400 --> 00:33:10,800
Okay, I'll hang up.
I'll deal with this myself.

469
00:33:10,900 --> 00:33:11,900
Toodle-oo.

470
00:33:13,600 --> 00:33:14,500
Good riddance.

471
00:33:16,300 --> 00:33:17,000
sir...

472
00:33:17,200 --> 00:33:17,800
Yes.

473
00:33:17,900 --> 00:33:21,200
The rooms are horribly humid.
Mr. Bernay is sneezing non-stop.

474
00:33:21,300 --> 00:33:24,300
He wanted to relax
after his speech on sponsoring.

475
00:33:24,300 --> 00:33:25,700
so he took a shower.

476
00:33:25,900 --> 00:33:26,500
Ice-cold.

477
00:33:26,700 --> 00:33:28,100
His head is full of shampoo.

478
00:33:28,200 --> 00:33:30,500
If you can't get the hot water back,

479
00:33:30,600 --> 00:33:32,600
We'll have to cut short the seminar.

480
00:33:33,800 --> 00:33:35,300
Does the lnstamatic work?

481
00:33:35,500 --> 00:33:37,600
I'm draining Mrs. Pelissier's molar.

482
00:33:38,000 --> 00:33:39,200
It'll be fine.

483
00:33:39,900 --> 00:33:42,000
This is the Montmirail's house.

484
00:33:47,300 --> 00:33:49,200
Take it easy!

485
00:33:51,600 --> 00:33:53,500
They'll bawI us out. stop!

486
00:33:53,600 --> 00:33:55,700
They'll call the cops
for noise pollution.

487
00:33:55,800 --> 00:33:57,600
Try ringing the bell.

488
00:34:01,700 --> 00:34:04,200
Knock it off!
They'll kick us out!

489
00:34:13,000 --> 00:34:15,600
Jacquart,
Why are you dressed like that?

490
00:34:17,000 --> 00:34:18,200
Excuse our excessive chiming,

491
00:34:18,400 --> 00:34:19,700
your Grace...

492
00:34:19,900 --> 00:34:20,900
Lady Frenegonde!

493
00:34:21,900 --> 00:34:23,500
Let me go! You're crazy!

494
00:34:26,200 --> 00:34:27,300
she's my mistress!

495
00:34:27,500 --> 00:34:28,200
What?

496
00:34:28,400 --> 00:34:30,000
Jean-Pierre, come here.

497
00:34:30,200 --> 00:34:32,400
Jacquart is calling me
"Frenegonde" too.

498
00:34:32,500 --> 00:34:34,400
You slept with her?
Don't worry.

499
00:34:35,000 --> 00:34:37,900
He looks weird but he's pals
With Montmirail the stuntman.

500
00:34:38,300 --> 00:34:39,600
Montmirail the stuntman?

501
00:34:39,800 --> 00:34:42,700
You must mean Hubert,
the race car driver.

502
00:34:42,900 --> 00:34:44,000
stuntman, wrestler...

503
00:34:44,100 --> 00:34:45,000
race car driver...

504
00:34:45,200 --> 00:34:46,100
same diff.

505
00:34:46,200 --> 00:34:47,300
But who are you?

506
00:34:48,200 --> 00:34:51,500
Jacquasse The Crass.
You don't recognizeth me?

507
00:34:51,600 --> 00:34:54,600
No, I don't recognizeth you.
You're Hubert's friend?

508
00:34:54,800 --> 00:34:56,800
Hubert de Montmirail, whatta hunk.

509
00:34:56,900 --> 00:34:58,300
And so considerate...

510
00:34:58,400 --> 00:35:00,400
Iike you, your Ladyship.

511
00:35:00,500 --> 00:35:02,500
And he gallops
like Kerwin Costnere.

512
00:35:03,200 --> 00:35:05,800
Coward that I am,
I lost track of my sire

513
00:35:05,800 --> 00:35:06,600
at the inn.

514
00:35:06,900 --> 00:35:08,100
They got in a brawI

515
00:35:08,300 --> 00:35:10,000
at Remi vautrot's pit stop.

516
00:35:10,100 --> 00:35:11,100
Whip me...

517
00:35:11,300 --> 00:35:12,900
your Ladyship!

518
00:35:14,800 --> 00:35:16,000
What is it?

519
00:35:17,800 --> 00:35:19,600
- Jacquart?
- Thou know'st me?

520
00:35:19,700 --> 00:35:20,400
What?

521
00:35:20,500 --> 00:35:21,600
A Jacquart from hunger.

522
00:35:21,800 --> 00:35:22,600
I'm lost.

523
00:35:22,800 --> 00:35:23,500
Mr. Goulard...

524
00:35:24,000 --> 00:35:24,800
Yes, hello...

525
00:35:24,900 --> 00:35:26,100
He's a friend

526
00:35:26,200 --> 00:35:28,100
of Hubert's. According to her,

527
00:35:28,200 --> 00:35:31,300
Hubert has become
a stuntman and a wrestler.

528
00:35:31,500 --> 00:35:33,900
What horrible teeth!
Let's have a look.

529
00:35:36,800 --> 00:35:38,200
I'm no mule! Zounds!

530
00:35:38,400 --> 00:35:40,700
That ass bit me!
I need a tetanus shot!

531
00:35:40,800 --> 00:35:42,600
He might even have rabies!

532
00:35:42,800 --> 00:35:45,400
It isn't Jacquart.
I did his bridge-work.

533
00:35:45,500 --> 00:35:47,600
Obviously, Jean-Pierre.

534
00:35:47,700 --> 00:35:49,600
He proves that Hubert is alive.

535
00:35:49,700 --> 00:35:52,300
We have to get him
out of the hospital.

536
00:35:52,900 --> 00:35:53,800
You banged the Countess?

537
00:35:55,900 --> 00:35:56,600
Bitch.

538
00:35:56,700 --> 00:36:00,000
The bum can't come.
My car isn't Noah's ark.

539
00:36:02,600 --> 00:36:03,500
Open the window.

540
00:36:03,600 --> 00:36:05,500
His body odor is unbearable.

541
00:36:06,900 --> 00:36:08,500
He's very, very green.

542
00:36:10,100 --> 00:36:12,000
stop the car.
He's going to vomit.

543
00:36:12,100 --> 00:36:13,100
Wait a second!

544
00:36:13,200 --> 00:36:14,300
Hold it in!

545
00:36:17,000 --> 00:36:18,100
It's coming!

546
00:36:23,800 --> 00:36:25,200
He got it all over.

547
00:36:25,400 --> 00:36:27,300
What a pig!
He puked on my shoes!

548
00:36:28,700 --> 00:36:32,000
Your cousin is very violent.
He nearly castrated me.

549
00:36:32,000 --> 00:36:34,200
Castrated clod!

550
00:36:34,300 --> 00:36:35,100
What?

551
00:36:35,700 --> 00:36:37,300
He saved our King's life.

552
00:36:37,500 --> 00:36:38,200
What?

553
00:36:38,400 --> 00:36:39,400
Ah, my youngling.

554
00:36:39,700 --> 00:36:41,500
Why did you abandon me?

555
00:36:43,200 --> 00:36:44,300
Their little red balls

556
00:36:44,400 --> 00:36:45,300
made me sleep.

557
00:36:45,600 --> 00:36:47,300
Master! Master!

558
00:36:47,400 --> 00:36:50,500
Why are you bound?
How much is the ransom?

559
00:36:50,500 --> 00:36:51,700
silence, peasant!

560
00:36:51,800 --> 00:36:53,900
The "Iittle red balls" are valium.

561
00:36:54,100 --> 00:36:55,900
50 milligrams. He barely slept.

562
00:36:58,100 --> 00:37:01,000
Apothecary, I demand
to be released immediately.

563
00:37:01,200 --> 00:37:02,300
Calm down.

564
00:37:03,400 --> 00:37:07,500
I am neither sick nor loony.
I come from far, far away.

565
00:37:07,500 --> 00:37:08,500
Yes.

566
00:37:08,600 --> 00:37:11,700
He thinks no one
understands who he is.

567
00:37:11,800 --> 00:37:13,300
Persecution mania.

568
00:37:13,500 --> 00:37:17,200
But it's true. He came from Borneo.
He had an accident during a rally.

569
00:37:17,700 --> 00:37:18,900
Right, cousin Hubert?

570
00:37:19,200 --> 00:37:19,900
Cousin Hubert?

571
00:37:20,100 --> 00:37:21,900
Yes. Hubert de Montmirail.

572
00:37:22,000 --> 00:37:25,000
It's freaky...
he has my father's hands.

573
00:37:25,800 --> 00:37:26,800
You know your name.

574
00:37:27,800 --> 00:37:30,200
He knows nothing.
He's completely amnesiac.

575
00:37:30,400 --> 00:37:32,200
He says he's never watched Tv.

576
00:37:32,300 --> 00:37:34,100
Amnesiac? How tragic!

577
00:37:45,200 --> 00:37:47,400
His last remaining memories are

578
00:37:47,600 --> 00:37:49,300
a few facts from History class.

579
00:37:49,500 --> 00:37:50,500
Elementary stuff.

580
00:37:50,800 --> 00:37:52,700
It's often the case with amnesiacs.

581
00:37:53,700 --> 00:37:56,900
He speaks a hodgepodge
of Latin and Old French.

582
00:37:57,100 --> 00:37:58,600
verbal diarrhea.

583
00:37:58,800 --> 00:38:00,000
Let him go.

584
00:38:00,800 --> 00:38:03,100
- Pawing at him won't help!
- Compose yourself.

585
00:38:04,300 --> 00:38:05,300
Will you free him?

586
00:38:05,600 --> 00:38:08,200
Yes, only because
your husband is a doctor,

587
00:38:08,300 --> 00:38:09,600
and he agrees to take

588
00:38:09,700 --> 00:38:10,700
full responsibility.

589
00:38:11,100 --> 00:38:12,600
Another relative of yours?

590
00:38:13,200 --> 00:38:14,400
No, not at all.

591
00:38:14,500 --> 00:38:16,200
An old friend of Hubert's.

592
00:38:16,400 --> 00:38:17,700
I belong to the Count.

593
00:38:18,700 --> 00:38:19,700
souplette, sire?

594
00:38:19,800 --> 00:38:22,900
Is he a foreigner?
I don't understand him.

595
00:38:23,000 --> 00:38:25,300
Yes, that must be it.
Come, cousin...

596
00:38:28,000 --> 00:38:31,900
Wait! lf you take him,
take his outfit too.

597
00:38:32,000 --> 00:38:34,700
It smells like a billy goat here.
It's repulsive.

598
00:38:39,600 --> 00:38:41,300
Here, take the valium.

599
00:38:41,400 --> 00:38:44,100
If he gets violent,
give him five of them.

600
00:38:44,200 --> 00:38:45,300
Thank you.

601
00:38:47,700 --> 00:38:50,200
Two more lunatics roaming the streets.

602
00:38:50,800 --> 00:38:51,600
sit down here.

603
00:38:51,800 --> 00:38:54,200
Take care of him. I'll get the car.

604
00:38:58,000 --> 00:38:59,500
Lady Frenegonde is strange.

605
00:38:59,600 --> 00:39:02,100
she is not Lady Frenegonde.
she's my descendant.

606
00:39:02,400 --> 00:39:05,500
My great great great
great great great granddaughter.

607
00:39:06,100 --> 00:39:08,300
Your great great
great great granddaughter?

608
00:39:09,100 --> 00:39:10,500
How terrible!

609
00:39:10,600 --> 00:39:14,200
My Crass, we're a 1 000 years old.
It's a living hell.

610
00:39:16,800 --> 00:39:18,700
We must search the dungeon.

611
00:39:18,800 --> 00:39:21,500
Angueran swore to lock up
the wizard and his Book.

612
00:39:21,700 --> 00:39:25,300
With the book, We can concoct
the potion and go back in Time.

613
00:39:25,400 --> 00:39:27,600
Drink that again? Pugh!

614
00:39:29,200 --> 00:39:30,700
You'd rather stay here?

615
00:39:33,100 --> 00:39:33,800
Oh no!

616
00:39:39,700 --> 00:39:41,300
Is this too fast, Hubert?

617
00:39:41,400 --> 00:39:42,600
Do you feel sick?

618
00:39:42,800 --> 00:39:45,800
Open your eyes, sire Godefroy.
You'll get used to it.

619
00:39:46,400 --> 00:39:48,300
Why "Godefroy" and not "Hubert"?

620
00:39:48,400 --> 00:39:49,900
Jean-Pierre, he has amnesia.

621
00:39:50,000 --> 00:39:51,800
Godefroy, Henri, suzy...

622
00:39:52,100 --> 00:39:55,600
Wait. Who has amnesia?
Your cousin or that other skunk?

623
00:39:56,300 --> 00:39:57,500
They both do, Jean-Pierre.

624
00:39:57,700 --> 00:39:59,500
Try being more tolerant.

625
00:40:06,300 --> 00:40:08,200
Their feet reek! It's revolting!

626
00:40:08,400 --> 00:40:10,100
What an insufferable ride!

627
00:40:10,200 --> 00:40:13,100
Please...
I didn't smell anything unusual.

628
00:40:17,600 --> 00:40:19,000
Did the kids behave?

629
00:40:19,100 --> 00:40:21,000
- Yes.
- Okay, toodle-oo!

630
00:40:21,100 --> 00:40:24,000
Zounds! What happened to Nature?

631
00:40:24,400 --> 00:40:26,700
Everything is ugly.
There's no room...

632
00:40:26,800 --> 00:40:28,300
to go hunting.

633
00:40:28,500 --> 00:40:30,800
The air is heavy.
It stinketh!

634
00:40:30,900 --> 00:40:31,900
I'll say!

635
00:40:32,100 --> 00:40:34,500
And it'll be worse
With the new highway.

636
00:40:35,900 --> 00:40:37,200
Good-bye, Dr. Goulard.

637
00:40:37,300 --> 00:40:38,600
Here you go.

638
00:40:38,900 --> 00:40:41,000
It smells gross. Yeeuck!

639
00:40:42,100 --> 00:40:43,300
Like old socks.

640
00:40:43,500 --> 00:40:44,300
Could be.

641
00:40:44,500 --> 00:40:45,900
see you tomorrow, Hilda.

642
00:40:48,600 --> 00:40:49,700
Where is my castle?

643
00:40:50,000 --> 00:40:51,500
We left the castle ages ago.

644
00:40:51,600 --> 00:40:52,500
Unfortunately.

645
00:40:52,600 --> 00:40:54,800
Can you imagine the heating bills?

646
00:40:55,100 --> 00:40:57,300
Anyway, Hubert,
make yourself at home here.

647
00:40:57,400 --> 00:40:58,700
I must go to the castle.

648
00:40:58,900 --> 00:40:59,900
Yes! Yes!

649
00:41:00,100 --> 00:41:02,200
That'll be tomorrow's outing!

650
00:41:02,300 --> 00:41:05,100
Count me out.
I'm over-booked already.

651
00:41:05,200 --> 00:41:06,000
Dinnertime!

652
00:41:06,500 --> 00:41:08,400
Yes! souplette! Good hot souplette!

653
00:41:08,600 --> 00:41:11,800
Yes, Mr... Jacques Kass.
I'll make you some.

654
00:41:15,700 --> 00:41:16,600
He loves soup.

655
00:41:21,300 --> 00:41:23,700
You live in a pitiful dwelling.

656
00:41:23,900 --> 00:41:25,300
'Tis for peasants.

657
00:41:25,400 --> 00:41:27,400
True, our home is simple.

658
00:41:27,600 --> 00:41:30,900
But it's cozy and has lent itself
to some marvelous evenings.

659
00:41:31,000 --> 00:41:31,800
Don't push it.

660
00:41:32,200 --> 00:41:34,400
We weren't counting
on having houseguests.

661
00:41:34,500 --> 00:41:35,900
so go easy on us, Hubert.

662
00:41:36,000 --> 00:41:37,300
You're Cousin Hubert?

663
00:41:37,500 --> 00:41:39,500
O! noble Cousin Hubert!

664
00:41:39,800 --> 00:41:41,800
Now he's calling me Hubert!

665
00:41:42,400 --> 00:41:43,600
They're both crazy!

666
00:41:45,700 --> 00:41:46,400
Listen, peon.

667
00:41:46,700 --> 00:41:48,000
I'm Cousin Hubert.

668
00:41:48,100 --> 00:41:49,300
You, sire?

669
00:41:49,600 --> 00:41:52,500
I don't want
to go back to the loonies.

670
00:41:52,500 --> 00:41:54,400
Call me "Cousin Hubert"...

671
00:41:54,500 --> 00:41:56,600
and never "sire". Understand?

672
00:41:57,000 --> 00:41:57,800
Yes, sire.

673
00:41:59,900 --> 00:42:02,700
stop that, or I'll give you
the little red balls.

674
00:42:05,500 --> 00:42:07,100
Leg of lamb, my sire!

675
00:42:07,200 --> 00:42:08,400
Why "my sire" now?

676
00:42:08,500 --> 00:42:11,100
I don't know, Jean-Pierre.
I just don't know.

677
00:42:12,900 --> 00:42:14,200
Mr... Kass,
that's for tomorrow.

678
00:42:14,400 --> 00:42:16,900
Tonight is cold roast beef
and a salad...

679
00:42:17,100 --> 00:42:18,400
and a Cup-a-soup for you.

680
00:42:18,500 --> 00:42:21,100
If you're still hungry,
you can have some left-overs.

681
00:42:21,200 --> 00:42:22,900
Then a shower and off to bed.

682
00:42:23,000 --> 00:42:26,200
Maybe they can start with the shower.
After such a trying day...

683
00:42:26,300 --> 00:42:27,800
they'll want to wash up.

684
00:42:27,900 --> 00:42:28,700
No servants?

685
00:42:30,400 --> 00:42:32,700
Come wash your hands.

686
00:43:15,900 --> 00:43:16,900
Bea, come look.

687
00:43:17,200 --> 00:43:17,900
What is it?

688
00:43:18,000 --> 00:43:18,900
Come look!

689
00:43:19,100 --> 00:43:20,400
What?

690
00:43:22,400 --> 00:43:24,500
Cousin Hubert, What are you doing?

691
00:43:24,700 --> 00:43:26,500
Can amnesia be this serious?

692
00:43:26,600 --> 00:43:28,100
They're boors!

693
00:43:28,200 --> 00:43:29,700
swimming in the toilet!

694
00:43:31,200 --> 00:43:32,000
Water.

695
00:43:33,200 --> 00:43:33,900
soap.

696
00:43:34,100 --> 00:43:35,500
Hot.

697
00:43:35,700 --> 00:43:37,500
Cold. Okay?

698
00:43:37,700 --> 00:43:39,400
Thank you, gentle Lady.

699
00:43:40,500 --> 00:43:42,000
Gentle lady...

700
00:43:44,700 --> 00:43:45,700
sire Godefroy.

701
00:43:47,200 --> 00:43:48,800
Cousin Hubert!

702
00:43:49,100 --> 00:43:51,000
Lady Frenegonde is
1 000 years old too?

703
00:43:51,600 --> 00:43:53,600
she's not Lady Frenegonde.

704
00:43:53,700 --> 00:43:55,100
she's Lady Beatrice.

705
00:43:55,200 --> 00:43:57,500
How often must I tell you?

706
00:43:58,300 --> 00:43:59,800
Lady Beatrice.

707
00:44:01,300 --> 00:44:02,800
The descendant.

708
00:44:06,700 --> 00:44:08,600
Jean-Pierre, set the table.

709
00:44:08,800 --> 00:44:09,500
The nice plates

710
00:44:09,800 --> 00:44:10,600
or the normal ones?

711
00:44:10,700 --> 00:44:12,600
Jean-Pierre, use mother's service.

712
00:44:12,700 --> 00:44:13,400
Ridiculous.

713
00:44:15,900 --> 00:44:17,900
Here. Help me, you two.

714
00:44:24,300 --> 00:44:26,500
You stupid idiots!

715
00:44:26,600 --> 00:44:29,700
Bea, they're retarded!
They can't even set a table!

716
00:44:32,900 --> 00:44:33,600
Hello!

717
00:44:34,100 --> 00:44:36,600
Don't scream.
It's Jacquart. I'm not deaf.

718
00:44:37,000 --> 00:44:40,100
I'm sorry, Jacques-Henri.
Bea has some family over.

719
00:44:40,500 --> 00:44:41,600
It's not easy.

720
00:44:41,700 --> 00:44:44,400
sorry to bother you.
I'm here with President Bernay

721
00:44:44,600 --> 00:44:46,600
the younger of the two
banking brothers.

722
00:44:46,700 --> 00:44:47,400
A charming man.

723
00:44:48,000 --> 00:44:51,100
Unfortunately,
he has a festering abscess.

724
00:44:51,200 --> 00:44:53,200
Due to the humidity in your hotel,

725
00:44:53,400 --> 00:44:55,600
or your "Royal Raspberry" sherbet.

726
00:44:55,800 --> 00:44:57,500
His face is all bloated.

727
00:45:06,400 --> 00:45:08,900
I'll see your friend Bernie
tomorrow at 8:00.

728
00:45:09,200 --> 00:45:11,200
It's Bernay, not Bernie.

729
00:45:13,700 --> 00:45:14,700
Lady-love...

730
00:45:14,800 --> 00:45:17,100
your skin is as soft as a rose petal.

731
00:45:19,500 --> 00:45:20,200
Hubert!

732
00:45:25,200 --> 00:45:26,700
How exciting to touch you...

733
00:45:26,800 --> 00:45:27,900
to lay beside you.

734
00:45:28,100 --> 00:45:30,100
Who does he want to lay?

735
00:45:34,600 --> 00:45:37,600
Jean-Pierre, you're totally on time.
Let's clean up.

736
00:45:38,700 --> 00:45:40,000
what were you up to?

737
00:45:40,300 --> 00:45:41,600
You're kissing cousins!

738
00:45:41,800 --> 00:45:43,000
- Not at all!
- sorry!

739
00:46:05,000 --> 00:46:06,100
He'll take him.

740
00:46:06,300 --> 00:46:07,300
He's too bad off.

741
00:46:07,800 --> 00:46:08,500
Hello?

742
00:46:08,800 --> 00:46:10,000
What the shit?

743
00:46:10,700 --> 00:46:11,400
shit.

744
00:46:11,700 --> 00:46:14,100
Hello, Jean-Pierre?
ls that Jean-Pierre?

745
00:46:17,900 --> 00:46:18,900
What the hell?

746
00:46:20,800 --> 00:46:22,100
You were sweethearts.

747
00:46:22,200 --> 00:46:24,600
Not at all. He was much older!

748
00:46:24,700 --> 00:46:26,900
You won't admit
you were flirting.

749
00:46:27,100 --> 00:46:31,100
Jean-Pierre, control yourself!
What you're saying is totally offensive.

750
00:46:31,300 --> 00:46:32,800
Is this my castle?

751
00:46:32,900 --> 00:46:33,700
Yes it is.

752
00:46:33,800 --> 00:46:35,900
Where's my watch-tower? My moat?

753
00:46:36,000 --> 00:46:37,400
My draw-bridge?

754
00:46:37,700 --> 00:46:39,900
Is my dungeon intact?

755
00:46:40,000 --> 00:46:42,300
He doesn't even recognize
your castle.

756
00:46:42,500 --> 00:46:45,100
Hub, it was rebuilt
after the Revolution.

757
00:46:45,200 --> 00:46:46,000
The what?

758
00:46:46,300 --> 00:46:47,400
Christ Almighty.

759
00:46:47,800 --> 00:46:50,200
I must go in my dungeon.

760
00:46:50,800 --> 00:46:53,100
Relax. You're hysterical, Hub.

761
00:46:53,200 --> 00:46:55,900
We'll go tomorrow.
But the dungeon is a legend.

762
00:46:56,000 --> 00:46:58,300
Father aIways thought one existed...

763
00:46:58,500 --> 00:47:00,600
but we never found it.

764
00:47:06,900 --> 00:47:08,800
It's like someone imitating a dog.

765
00:47:09,600 --> 00:47:11,300
Listen. It's strange.

766
00:47:16,700 --> 00:47:18,100
I don't hear a thing.

767
00:47:18,300 --> 00:47:19,000
President Bernay.

768
00:47:26,700 --> 00:47:28,300
Now he's gone too far!

769
00:47:28,600 --> 00:47:31,100
He better not have woken
Florian and Ondine.

770
00:47:33,300 --> 00:47:36,700
No! Bea! He burnt
your umbrell-Ahhhhh!

771
00:47:37,500 --> 00:47:38,400
Umbrella.

772
00:47:38,700 --> 00:47:40,000
In the hole.

773
00:47:40,200 --> 00:47:41,400
These eardrops sting.

774
00:47:41,500 --> 00:47:43,400
The dog never complained.

775
00:47:44,000 --> 00:47:46,500
If President Bernay has lost...

776
00:47:46,800 --> 00:47:49,400
just one percent of his hearing,

777
00:47:49,600 --> 00:47:52,000
We'll sue the pants off you.

778
00:47:52,500 --> 00:47:53,800
I've gone deaf.

779
00:47:54,300 --> 00:47:57,800
I'm a little confused...
You're a race car driver?

780
00:47:58,500 --> 00:48:01,000
A boxer? A stuntman?

781
00:48:01,200 --> 00:48:02,400
A movie actor?

782
00:48:04,600 --> 00:48:06,700
Who's the star of the movie?

783
00:48:06,800 --> 00:48:08,800
Do I know him? And the director?

784
00:48:10,200 --> 00:48:13,100
stop the interrogation.
You're exhausting them.

785
00:48:13,200 --> 00:48:14,900
Can't we talk?

786
00:48:15,100 --> 00:48:16,000
Am I boring you?

787
00:48:16,600 --> 00:48:17,500
Ay, indeed.

788
00:48:17,700 --> 00:48:18,500
Charming.

789
00:48:18,700 --> 00:48:19,500
You see.

790
00:48:20,300 --> 00:48:21,500
Will this last long?

791
00:48:21,700 --> 00:48:22,700
Day...

792
00:48:22,800 --> 00:48:23,700
Night...

793
00:48:29,400 --> 00:48:32,400
Please, Mr. Kass,
that's becoming rather grating.

794
00:48:32,500 --> 00:48:35,000
Can't he join us?
It's embarrassing.

795
00:48:35,200 --> 00:48:37,100
He ne'er eats amid nobility.

796
00:48:37,200 --> 00:48:39,500
He is happy to munch
our left-o'ers.

797
00:48:39,600 --> 00:48:40,600
Here, boy.

798
00:48:40,800 --> 00:48:42,400
Thank you, sire Hubert!

799
00:48:42,500 --> 00:48:44,900
He's mashing potatoes into the rug!

800
00:48:45,100 --> 00:48:46,900
Enough! Come sit here.

801
00:48:47,000 --> 00:48:49,300
That would upset him,
right Jacquasse?

802
00:48:49,500 --> 00:48:50,800
You want to sit here?

803
00:48:50,900 --> 00:48:52,700
No, sire Hubert.

804
00:48:52,900 --> 00:48:55,300
In my house, we all eat together.

805
00:48:55,400 --> 00:48:57,000
Nay! Nay!

806
00:48:57,100 --> 00:48:58,100
Obey, peasant.

807
00:48:58,300 --> 00:48:59,500
Your host insists.

808
00:48:59,700 --> 00:49:00,800
It'll be cozier.

809
00:49:03,200 --> 00:49:04,000
There.

810
00:49:06,400 --> 00:49:08,200
My sweet and pretty youngling...

811
00:49:08,600 --> 00:49:09,800
Yes, dear cousin?

812
00:49:10,000 --> 00:49:11,800
If you live in this poor abode,

813
00:49:11,900 --> 00:49:13,300
Who owns our castle?

814
00:49:14,300 --> 00:49:16,100
Jacques-Henri Jacquart. He's...

815
00:49:16,800 --> 00:49:19,000
rather nouveau riche
and a bit affected.

816
00:49:19,000 --> 00:49:23,400
- His family farmed our land.
- A peasant owns our castle?

817
00:49:24,400 --> 00:49:26,300
- A peasant!
- What peasant?

818
00:49:26,600 --> 00:49:28,100
Please! Jean-Pierre
is a peasant too.

819
00:49:28,200 --> 00:49:29,900
And he's a good husband.

820
00:49:30,000 --> 00:49:31,200
He's a peasant? Pugh!

821
00:49:35,200 --> 00:49:36,100
I lost my appetite.

822
00:49:37,100 --> 00:49:38,400
This is too much!

823
00:49:38,500 --> 00:49:40,100
I feel like throwing up.

824
00:49:40,200 --> 00:49:41,200
Did you hear that?

825
00:49:42,300 --> 00:49:43,200
Hear what?

826
00:49:44,500 --> 00:49:48,000
Now he's spitting on me.
Or didn't you notice?

827
00:49:48,000 --> 00:49:49,100
Excuse the oaf.

828
00:49:49,300 --> 00:49:52,600
He is saddened to hear
that a peasant owns my castle.

829
00:49:52,700 --> 00:49:53,400
But why?

830
00:49:53,600 --> 00:49:55,300
My sweet, radiant youngling...

831
00:49:55,400 --> 00:49:57,700
I shall right this horrible wrong.

832
00:49:57,900 --> 00:50:01,200
Jacquart shall render the castle
in exchange for crowns.

833
00:50:01,400 --> 00:50:03,300
If he refuses,
I'll disembowel him.

834
00:50:03,400 --> 00:50:07,800
We'll rip off his stalk
Like we did the Duke of York

835
00:50:08,300 --> 00:50:11,700
We hacked him up
Amid his shrieks and howIs.

836
00:50:11,800 --> 00:50:13,700
We hung him up...

837
00:50:13,900 --> 00:50:16,600
alongside his bloody boweIs.

838
00:50:20,000 --> 00:50:21,600
Bring in the hens.
I'm starved.

839
00:50:21,700 --> 00:50:22,600
Hang who?

840
00:50:22,700 --> 00:50:23,400
Jacquart the Peasant.

841
00:50:23,600 --> 00:50:25,000
Bring the roasted lamb...

842
00:50:25,200 --> 00:50:27,000
the sausage and the beans...

843
00:50:27,100 --> 00:50:28,100
the venison...

844
00:50:28,800 --> 00:50:31,400
Let us feast
to forget this injustice!

845
00:50:31,600 --> 00:50:33,700
Bring in kidney beans and kidneys.

846
00:50:33,800 --> 00:50:35,700
A piglet and a roasted goat.

847
00:50:35,900 --> 00:50:38,100
Well-peppered white swans.

848
00:50:38,200 --> 00:50:40,100
Your whets have
given me appetite.

849
00:50:40,300 --> 00:50:42,000
You just stuffed your faces!

850
00:50:42,700 --> 00:50:43,900
What's this puddle?

851
00:50:45,200 --> 00:50:47,100
The room is totally flooded!

852
00:50:48,600 --> 00:50:50,800
What happened?

853
00:50:53,600 --> 00:50:56,400
They didn't turn off the Water!
They're deranged!

854
00:50:56,600 --> 00:50:58,500
They can't shut off the tap!

855
00:50:58,600 --> 00:51:00,400
send them to the nut house!

856
00:51:00,500 --> 00:51:01,600
Jacquasse, spongeth!

857
00:51:01,700 --> 00:51:02,400
Yes, sire!

858
00:51:06,400 --> 00:51:07,100
Who is that?

859
00:51:09,900 --> 00:51:13,600
Mr. Kass! Not with your poncho!
I'll get some rags.

860
00:51:13,800 --> 00:51:14,700
What is it now?

861
00:51:14,900 --> 00:51:17,800
sorry to pop in, but
President Bernay can't cope.

862
00:51:17,800 --> 00:51:18,700
God knows how,

863
00:51:18,900 --> 00:51:22,800
When Edgar took the phone,
a foghorn sounded in his ear.

864
00:51:22,800 --> 00:51:23,800
I'm not an ENT.

865
00:51:23,900 --> 00:51:26,300
But it aggravated his toothache.

866
00:51:26,400 --> 00:51:27,300
Irts trrowwwing.

867
00:51:27,500 --> 00:51:28,600
It's throbbing.

868
00:51:28,800 --> 00:51:29,900
Open your mouth.

869
00:51:30,500 --> 00:51:32,400
How repulsive!
Wait here.

870
00:51:32,800 --> 00:51:34,600
I'm going to fix
Bernaise's tooth.

871
00:51:34,800 --> 00:51:36,500
It's Bernay. Edgar Bernay.

872
00:51:36,700 --> 00:51:38,900
His abscess is incredibly ugly.

873
00:51:39,100 --> 00:51:40,900
We'll be in my office.

874
00:51:41,300 --> 00:51:44,300
Come on, come on! Everyone join in.

875
00:51:46,400 --> 00:51:50,000
Can raspberry sherbet cause
this type of infection?

876
00:51:50,100 --> 00:51:51,200
No idea.

877
00:51:51,800 --> 00:51:54,900
Bad timing, Jacquart.
We're in the middle of a flood.

878
00:51:54,900 --> 00:51:57,800
Did the sewer back up?
It smells god-awful.

879
00:51:57,900 --> 00:52:00,700
Be totally careful
not to knock the bucket over.

880
00:52:00,800 --> 00:52:02,800
Empty the bucket
and sponge hardily.

881
00:52:02,900 --> 00:52:04,900
Ay! Take this rag.

882
00:52:05,000 --> 00:52:08,200
He threw a filthy mop
on my linen jacket!

883
00:52:08,300 --> 00:52:11,100
Mr. Kass, be careful with
Mr. Jacquart's linen jacket.

884
00:52:12,300 --> 00:52:15,500
Mr. Jacquart, meet my cousin
Hubert, long-considered dead.

885
00:52:15,700 --> 00:52:16,600
My pleasure.

886
00:52:16,800 --> 00:52:18,500
My jacket is stained now.

887
00:52:18,700 --> 00:52:20,100
A Hartwood original.

888
00:52:24,500 --> 00:52:28,300
You're a less-bloated
look-alike of your ancestor,

889
00:52:28,300 --> 00:52:30,800
Godefroy the Hardy.
I have his portrait in the castle.

890
00:52:30,900 --> 00:52:32,000
Ay, 'tis l.

891
00:52:36,500 --> 00:52:37,900
Do I have a pimple?

892
00:52:38,500 --> 00:52:41,100
That nose... those slimy eyes.

893
00:52:41,400 --> 00:52:43,400
You're The Crass's descendant.

894
00:52:43,500 --> 00:52:44,400
The Crass? Please...

895
00:52:44,700 --> 00:52:46,700
What a disgrace!

896
00:52:46,900 --> 00:52:48,700
Here, boy. start a-mopping.

897
00:52:48,900 --> 00:52:49,800
Mr. Kass...

898
00:52:49,900 --> 00:52:52,300
Ieave Mr. Jacquart be.
It's not his flood.

899
00:52:54,200 --> 00:52:56,100
- Mr. Who?
- Jacquasse.

900
00:52:56,200 --> 00:52:58,500
What an ugly face!

901
00:52:59,300 --> 00:53:02,100
Your Jacquart is a traitor.
His real name is Jacquasse.

902
00:53:02,300 --> 00:53:04,500
I aIways knew Jacquart
as Jacquart.

903
00:53:09,700 --> 00:53:12,200
Unless he changed his name
to be more chic.

904
00:53:19,600 --> 00:53:23,400
Jacques-Henri, how long have
you had the name "Jacquart"?

905
00:53:23,700 --> 00:53:24,300
Why?

906
00:53:24,500 --> 00:53:29,000
Because you're
the spitting image of Mr. Kass...

907
00:53:29,000 --> 00:53:30,600
and your names are similar.

908
00:53:30,700 --> 00:53:33,800
I have nothing in common
with this gentleman.

909
00:53:34,000 --> 00:53:35,900
Just look at him.

910
00:53:40,100 --> 00:53:42,000
No relationship at all.

911
00:53:43,200 --> 00:53:46,100
I can't find my pouch
in this unholy mess.

912
00:53:46,300 --> 00:53:49,500
Dr. Goulard is a genius.
The abscess is... Oh my! ...

913
00:53:49,600 --> 00:53:52,200
drained.
The President is back in form.

914
00:53:53,200 --> 00:53:54,600
Mr. Jacquart, is this...

915
00:53:54,700 --> 00:53:56,600
- your brother?
- He's not my brother!

916
00:53:56,700 --> 00:53:57,700
I'm Jacquasse The Crass.

917
00:53:57,900 --> 00:53:59,600
sorry, but it's getting late.

918
00:54:00,000 --> 00:54:02,000
I understand. Let's go.

919
00:54:02,200 --> 00:54:03,500
Thank you.

920
00:54:04,100 --> 00:54:04,900
One minute, jester.

921
00:54:06,500 --> 00:54:09,000
Let's make a deal.
I'll buy back the castle.

922
00:54:12,800 --> 00:54:13,600
Take this, peasant.

923
00:54:14,200 --> 00:54:15,100
A down payment.

924
00:54:15,200 --> 00:54:18,600
Jacquart, take care of this.
We'll be in the car.

925
00:54:19,500 --> 00:54:20,400
I'm coming.

926
00:54:20,700 --> 00:54:22,400
My castle is not for sale,

927
00:54:22,600 --> 00:54:23,700
I own it, Count.

928
00:54:23,800 --> 00:54:24,800
Old gold coins?

929
00:54:25,200 --> 00:54:27,400
I have 5 chests full,
and 1 0 of jewels.

930
00:54:27,500 --> 00:54:30,000
This upstart peasant
can't stop me from buying it.

931
00:54:30,200 --> 00:54:32,800
He's got nerve!
This is a fucking democracy.

932
00:54:33,300 --> 00:54:34,100
What's "fucking"?

933
00:54:35,100 --> 00:54:38,400
Jacquart, you've gone overboard.
That was vulgar.

934
00:54:38,500 --> 00:54:42,300
What nerve! I take care
of your Mr. Barbie for a modest fee,

935
00:54:42,300 --> 00:54:45,800
and you humiliate our houseguest.
Apologize!

936
00:54:45,900 --> 00:54:48,300
Who does the hygienist think she is?

937
00:54:50,300 --> 00:54:53,100
shameless liar!
lf you're proud of your family,

938
00:54:53,300 --> 00:54:54,900
Why change your name?

939
00:54:55,000 --> 00:54:56,800
What is the heinous secret?

940
00:54:56,900 --> 00:55:00,900
An ogre? A witch? A child-slayer?

941
00:55:00,900 --> 00:55:02,800
Hands off, Nazi!

942
00:55:02,900 --> 00:55:06,300
If he can't understand why
Jacquart sounds better than Jacquasse,

943
00:55:06,300 --> 00:55:08,100
he should see a shrink.

944
00:55:09,500 --> 00:55:12,400
I don't get it.
You're Jacquart's brother?

945
00:55:13,100 --> 00:55:14,200
His brother?

946
00:55:15,200 --> 00:55:16,100
Were you serious

947
00:55:16,300 --> 00:55:17,700
about buying back the castle?

948
00:55:18,000 --> 00:55:19,700
A gift for you, my youngling.

949
00:55:20,300 --> 00:55:21,200
I'm tired.

950
00:55:21,400 --> 00:55:22,800
That's right. Bedtime!

951
00:55:24,100 --> 00:55:26,300
How about some herbal tea, Hub?

952
00:55:27,700 --> 00:55:29,100
Amnesia...

953
00:55:29,900 --> 00:55:31,300
Cousin Hubert.

954
00:55:31,400 --> 00:55:34,200
The new sire of the castle
is a Jacquasse?

955
00:55:34,600 --> 00:55:38,900
My God, how can that be?
Peasants have become sires.

956
00:55:39,600 --> 00:55:41,000
Let us pray.

957
00:55:47,000 --> 00:55:48,400
Jacquasse!

958
00:56:03,700 --> 00:56:04,400
Beatrice!

959
00:56:05,000 --> 00:56:06,700
They're praying now!

960
00:56:12,600 --> 00:56:14,400
Don't scream. Let them pray.

961
00:56:14,600 --> 00:56:15,300
Mommy...

962
00:56:15,400 --> 00:56:17,600
There are bums in the living room.

963
00:56:17,800 --> 00:56:19,400
Now they've woken the kids.

964
00:56:21,400 --> 00:56:22,700
The lineage!

965
00:56:31,900 --> 00:56:34,100
Your brother is
the Count of Montmirail's valet?

966
00:56:34,200 --> 00:56:35,100
I have no brother!

967
00:56:35,700 --> 00:56:36,500
Older or younger?

968
00:56:36,600 --> 00:56:38,300
We're not brothers!

969
00:56:38,400 --> 00:56:39,300
I'm an only son.

970
00:56:39,500 --> 00:56:41,400
We don't have the same name!

971
00:56:41,800 --> 00:56:43,200
He smells awful.

972
00:56:43,600 --> 00:56:46,000
still, it was smart
to change your name.

973
00:56:46,000 --> 00:56:48,400
I once had a friend
named Francois Twat.

974
00:56:48,500 --> 00:56:51,000
He changed it to watt.
It changed his life.

975
00:56:51,100 --> 00:56:53,300
Jacquasse is just too much!

976
00:56:53,500 --> 00:56:54,400
I'll say.

977
00:56:54,500 --> 00:56:58,000
sorry, my name is not
Jacques Asse, but Jacquart.

978
00:56:58,100 --> 00:57:00,000
They're ugly.
They stink. Gross!

979
00:57:00,200 --> 00:57:02,000
Cousin Hubert is not a burglar.

980
00:57:02,100 --> 00:57:04,400
His friend is not a smelly witch.

981
00:57:04,600 --> 00:57:07,400
Cousin Hubert and Mr. Kass,
let the children see you.

982
00:57:08,400 --> 00:57:10,000
Nighty night, kidlings.

983
00:57:15,100 --> 00:57:17,800
Don't stand there!
You'll scare them to death!

984
00:57:20,600 --> 00:57:22,100
You scared them, Jean-Pierre.

985
00:57:22,200 --> 00:57:23,100
Come on.

986
00:57:23,300 --> 00:57:25,700
Lather up well. Especially your feet.

987
00:57:26,300 --> 00:57:29,300
soap and bath salt.
Help yourself... please.

988
00:57:29,900 --> 00:57:30,900
I'll leave you.

989
00:57:31,900 --> 00:57:33,800
- What's wrong with our feet?
- I don't know.

990
00:57:33,900 --> 00:57:36,000
Another peasant ruse, no doubt.

991
00:57:36,800 --> 00:57:38,100
It boil'st.

992
00:57:40,400 --> 00:57:41,400
The ointments.

993
00:58:09,700 --> 00:58:11,200
Jacquasse, scrub me.

994
00:58:11,700 --> 00:58:12,600
strange brush.

995
00:58:13,400 --> 00:58:14,400
It'll do fine.

996
00:58:18,000 --> 00:58:19,100
How is it going?

997
00:58:19,900 --> 00:58:21,700
I have finished my ablutions.

998
00:58:23,100 --> 00:58:24,200
Your turn.

999
00:58:24,300 --> 00:58:26,200
Nay, sire. I bathed last month

1000
00:58:26,300 --> 00:58:27,500
in the river.

1001
00:58:28,100 --> 00:58:29,900
I said it's your turn.

1002
00:58:30,000 --> 00:58:30,900
It boil'st!

1003
00:58:31,100 --> 00:58:32,600
What are they up to?

1004
00:58:32,700 --> 00:58:34,200
Why the uproar?

1005
00:58:35,100 --> 00:58:37,200
My Jacquasse is a-scrubbing.

1006
00:58:37,300 --> 00:58:39,600
I'll dry off in the chimney corner.

1007
00:58:44,800 --> 00:58:47,500
The entire bottle!
6000 francs down the drain!

1008
00:58:48,200 --> 00:58:49,900
Don't pull the plug!

1009
00:58:50,300 --> 00:58:53,200
I shall miss thee, lady-love

1010
00:58:54,000 --> 00:58:59,300
WhiIst I fight in the Crusades

1011
00:59:00,000 --> 00:59:04,600
Leaving you behind, turtle-dove

1012
00:59:05,800 --> 00:59:11,600
Darkens my heart, 'fore I fight

1013
00:59:13,900 --> 00:59:16,800
I can't stand it any more.

1014
00:59:17,000 --> 00:59:18,000
Take a valium.

1015
00:59:20,000 --> 00:59:20,900
sire,

1016
00:59:21,900 --> 00:59:24,400
Jacquart... Is he
my great great grandson?

1017
00:59:25,000 --> 00:59:26,000
Yes, my Jacquasse.

1018
00:59:26,400 --> 00:59:28,500
Poor you. Let's sleep.

1019
00:59:31,500 --> 00:59:33,300
It's mushy like porridge.

1020
00:59:41,700 --> 00:59:42,800
What now?

1021
00:59:43,000 --> 00:59:46,900
Beatrice, tell me about
the kingdom since Louis the Fat.

1022
00:59:47,300 --> 00:59:49,200
Now?
Are you kidding?

1023
00:59:49,300 --> 00:59:50,200
Jean-Pierre!

1024
00:59:53,600 --> 00:59:56,100
This is an evil book.
I like it not.

1025
00:59:56,100 --> 00:59:58,100
It's the encyclopedia.
It has everything.

1026
00:59:58,300 --> 01:00:01,600
Nothing on Godefroy de Montmirail,
When he saved our King,

1027
01:00:01,800 --> 01:00:03,300
during the Battle of Monthlery?

1028
01:00:03,400 --> 01:00:05,000
Not a word.

1029
01:00:05,100 --> 01:00:05,800
Really?

1030
01:00:05,900 --> 01:00:08,800
But his courage is renown
from Poitou to savoie.

1031
01:00:09,100 --> 01:00:11,800
Godefroy the Hardy,
Louis the Fat... no one cares.

1032
01:00:12,400 --> 01:00:15,200
Our most famous family member
is Gonzague de Montmirail.

1033
01:00:15,300 --> 01:00:17,400
Born in 1 754. Remember?

1034
01:00:17,500 --> 01:00:18,200
No.

1035
01:00:18,400 --> 01:00:20,600
He fought the Revolution
against the rich,

1036
01:00:21,300 --> 01:00:23,600
so they'd share their land
With the peasants.

1037
01:00:23,700 --> 01:00:24,400
What?

1038
01:00:24,500 --> 01:00:27,400
He helped create
the Republic with La Fayette.

1039
01:00:27,600 --> 01:00:30,000
But he wasn't rewarded for his courage.

1040
01:00:30,100 --> 01:00:31,900
Robespierre had him decapitated.

1041
01:00:32,500 --> 01:00:34,900
A fine man, this Robespierre.

1042
01:00:35,700 --> 01:00:37,200
Why do you say that?

1043
01:00:39,100 --> 01:00:41,400
Why is Mr. Kass spying on us?

1044
01:00:41,600 --> 01:00:42,800
What infamy, my Jacquasse.

1045
01:00:42,900 --> 01:00:47,200
Peasants no longer pay taxes.
No more tallage, nor tithers.

1046
01:00:48,000 --> 01:00:50,400
How unfair.
We must return home.

1047
01:00:52,000 --> 01:00:53,700
What's that on your finger?

1048
01:00:54,900 --> 01:00:56,100
It's my seal.

1049
01:00:56,300 --> 01:00:57,800
Your seal?

1050
01:00:58,300 --> 01:01:01,100
It's The Hardy Ring!
You stole it from the castle?

1051
01:01:01,400 --> 01:01:05,000
Call the police. Or Jacquart
may think we're accomplices.

1052
01:01:05,100 --> 01:01:07,500
spare me. I'll return the ring.

1053
01:01:07,600 --> 01:01:10,800
Jacquart will understand
that Hubert is mentally ill.

1054
01:01:11,400 --> 01:01:14,300
Mentally ill.
Lock him up,

1055
01:01:14,500 --> 01:01:16,000
if he's mentally ill!

1056
01:01:16,900 --> 01:01:17,700
Where is Mr. Kass?

1057
01:01:18,000 --> 01:01:18,700
Out there.

1058
01:01:19,600 --> 01:01:21,900
What ripe apples, fair Ginette!

1059
01:01:22,000 --> 01:01:25,300
Come on, no feelies, stud.

1060
01:01:25,400 --> 01:01:28,900
see 'ya. My groupies
are getting impatient.

1061
01:01:29,600 --> 01:01:31,600
Here I come, fans.

1062
01:01:34,300 --> 01:01:35,400
Come on, Mr. Kass.

1063
01:01:51,500 --> 01:01:54,400
Ladies and Gents... for the artiste.

1064
01:01:54,400 --> 01:01:56,300
Ladies and Gents...

1065
01:02:01,200 --> 01:02:02,900
This is incredible!

1066
01:02:03,000 --> 01:02:06,300
A minute ago it was gorgeous.
Now it's raining cats and dogs.

1067
01:02:06,700 --> 01:02:09,300
I am angered that
you think me a bandit.

1068
01:02:09,400 --> 01:02:11,700
I never said "bandit".
Don't exaggerate.

1069
01:02:11,800 --> 01:02:14,900
This ring is mine. A siIversmith
made it for me in Flanders.

1070
01:02:14,900 --> 01:02:16,000
It cost me 1 00 ducats.

1071
01:02:16,300 --> 01:02:20,700
That's impossible, Hub.
Father sold that ring with the castle.

1072
01:02:20,700 --> 01:02:22,300
It can't be here and there!

1073
01:02:28,700 --> 01:02:32,200
President Bernay cannot give
his speech in that ruckus.

1074
01:02:32,400 --> 01:02:35,500
There's an old ring
sizzling in a glass case.

1075
01:02:35,500 --> 01:02:38,100
An old ring sizzling in a case?
What next?

1076
01:02:40,800 --> 01:02:44,300
Look! How can we concentrate
on the prospecting?

1077
01:02:44,300 --> 01:02:45,700
It's the Hardy Ring!

1078
01:02:48,800 --> 01:02:51,800
Don't just stand there!
Get a fire extinguisher!

1079
01:03:00,500 --> 01:03:01,800
Make way!

1080
01:03:03,900 --> 01:03:05,700
Open the case!

1081
01:03:07,600 --> 01:03:09,500
It's burning!

1082
01:03:12,000 --> 01:03:13,200
It's broken.

1083
01:03:13,400 --> 01:03:14,500
What an ass!

1084
01:03:15,400 --> 01:03:17,600
What an ass! I'm blind!

1085
01:03:21,900 --> 01:03:22,800
Hold this.

1086
01:03:24,900 --> 01:03:25,900
This is crazy!

1087
01:03:26,000 --> 01:03:29,000
It's pitch black outside!
This is unreal!

1088
01:03:32,100 --> 01:03:34,000
It's hailing now.

1089
01:03:34,100 --> 01:03:36,500
Cheer up, Hub.
We'll return the Hardy Ring.

1090
01:03:36,800 --> 01:03:38,100
All will be forgotten.

1091
01:03:38,200 --> 01:03:40,000
He's The Hardy!

1092
01:03:40,600 --> 01:03:44,000
Mr. Kass, sit back. Did you eat
old goat cheese for breakfast?

1093
01:03:44,900 --> 01:03:47,400
sorry to be blunt,
but I can't open the window.

1094
01:03:47,600 --> 01:03:49,300
stay back there, please.

1095
01:03:50,300 --> 01:03:52,600
The closer we get,
the darker it gets.

1096
01:03:54,900 --> 01:03:56,600
It works. Easy as pie.

1097
01:03:56,700 --> 01:03:59,200
He's a stupid ass.

1098
01:04:00,700 --> 01:04:01,800
Go ahead.

1099
01:04:02,200 --> 01:04:04,700
This extinguisher
Wouldn't put out a match.

1100
01:04:06,600 --> 01:04:08,500
Get out of here, honey!

1101
01:04:09,300 --> 01:04:10,100
It's going to explode!

1102
01:04:11,300 --> 01:04:12,800
What now?

1103
01:04:12,900 --> 01:04:14,800
You have ants in your pants?

1104
01:04:15,000 --> 01:04:17,600
The ring is a-fire!
It's devil work!

1105
01:04:21,000 --> 01:04:23,100
It fell under the seat.

1106
01:04:27,100 --> 01:04:28,600
stop the chariot, girl!

1107
01:04:36,600 --> 01:04:38,600
Help! Call the Fire Department.

1108
01:04:38,800 --> 01:04:42,700
Perfect timing, Jacquart. Hubert
has the Hardy ring, God knows how.

1109
01:04:42,700 --> 01:04:44,000
He brought it back.

1110
01:04:44,100 --> 01:04:46,700
The Hardy ring is here!
It's on fire!

1111
01:04:47,600 --> 01:04:49,100
My seal's a-fire!

1112
01:04:53,500 --> 01:04:56,200
How can it be up there?
It's down here.

1113
01:04:56,300 --> 01:04:57,700
Leave me alone!

1114
01:04:57,800 --> 01:05:00,300
- 'Tis sizzling and boiling.
- 'Tis hissing!

1115
01:05:03,200 --> 01:05:04,200
What are you doing?

1116
01:05:08,600 --> 01:05:09,800
Did you see lightning?

1117
01:05:10,100 --> 01:05:12,700
Wait a sec.
My roof looks like a cauliflower.

1118
01:05:18,100 --> 01:05:19,400
The lightning!

1119
01:05:22,300 --> 01:05:25,200
My Range! Godammit!

1120
01:05:28,100 --> 01:05:29,200
What happened?

1121
01:05:29,300 --> 01:05:32,400
It's incredible. It's nice out again.
Just unbelievable.

1122
01:05:32,500 --> 01:05:36,400
Jacquasse, look how they
changed our beautiful castle!

1123
01:05:36,500 --> 01:05:38,600
Windows galore! We're defenseless!

1124
01:05:38,900 --> 01:05:40,300
A godsend
for the visigoths.

1125
01:05:40,600 --> 01:05:41,400
And the Huttes.

1126
01:05:41,600 --> 01:05:43,500
Pray the dungeon is intact.

1127
01:05:43,900 --> 01:05:45,200
This weather is amazing.

1128
01:05:45,400 --> 01:05:46,700
I don't give a damn.

1129
01:05:49,200 --> 01:05:52,800
My Range! Dammit!
A brand new car with all the extras!

1130
01:05:53,600 --> 01:05:56,900
Look! It's ruined!
It's completely ruined!

1131
01:06:02,000 --> 01:06:02,900
Jacquart!

1132
01:06:03,100 --> 01:06:04,500
There's no lightning rod?

1133
01:06:04,600 --> 01:06:06,200
That's unheard of!

1134
01:06:06,400 --> 01:06:08,800
The explosion
almost maimed the President.

1135
01:06:08,900 --> 01:06:10,000
No one was hurt?

1136
01:06:10,100 --> 01:06:12,300
No, thank God.
Just a car.

1137
01:06:12,400 --> 01:06:14,300
Thank God?
Thanks a lot!

1138
01:06:15,100 --> 01:06:15,800
My limo?

1139
01:06:16,000 --> 01:06:18,900
No, not your limo.
My new Range.

1140
01:06:19,000 --> 01:06:22,200
Don't lie. I can see from here.
The hood is burnt.

1141
01:06:22,300 --> 01:06:25,100
It's not burnt. Not at all!

1142
01:06:25,200 --> 01:06:28,200
Not the roof!
The hood, you idiot!

1143
01:06:28,300 --> 01:06:29,000
I'm warning you:

1144
01:06:29,300 --> 01:06:32,000
if it's burnt,
We'll see you in court!

1145
01:06:32,000 --> 01:06:34,400
No, it's okay.
It's okay! Look!

1146
01:06:34,600 --> 01:06:35,600
Okkk ayyy!

1147
01:06:35,800 --> 01:06:38,800
I'm rubbing it.
I'm polishing it! Look!

1148
01:06:38,800 --> 01:06:41,100
It's so clean I can see myself!

1149
01:06:41,900 --> 01:06:43,100
Look!

1150
01:06:44,000 --> 01:06:45,200
It's okkk ayyy.

1151
01:06:46,200 --> 01:06:47,100
What's so funny?

1152
01:06:51,300 --> 01:06:53,800
Come, Jacquasse.
Let us go to my chamber.

1153
01:06:54,400 --> 01:06:56,400
...that hissing ring!

1154
01:06:56,500 --> 01:06:58,200
Give me Claims Division.

1155
01:07:00,900 --> 01:07:02,600
What kind of ring?

1156
01:07:02,700 --> 01:07:03,800
A signet ring.

1157
01:07:04,100 --> 01:07:06,400
You mean the Hardy ring
Was in its case?

1158
01:07:06,400 --> 01:07:07,700
I don't know.

1159
01:07:07,900 --> 01:07:09,200
Impossible.

1160
01:07:09,300 --> 01:07:10,200
Where the hell...

1161
01:07:10,800 --> 01:07:13,500
Jacqueline, where are you taking
these men?

1162
01:07:13,700 --> 01:07:15,000
To the Hardy suite.

1163
01:07:15,500 --> 01:07:17,900
Innkeeper,
We'll be here several nights.

1164
01:07:18,300 --> 01:07:20,800
You and your friend?
There's just one bed.

1165
01:07:20,800 --> 01:07:22,800
He'll sleep on a mat
in the halIway.

1166
01:07:22,900 --> 01:07:24,100
Not here, he won't.

1167
01:07:24,300 --> 01:07:25,600
In the stable, then.

1168
01:07:25,700 --> 01:07:28,700
Pity, sire! Not the stable.
I prefer the forest!

1169
01:07:28,800 --> 01:07:32,400
There is no stable. so pay
for the room or go to the forest.

1170
01:07:32,500 --> 01:07:36,300
You understand me, my boy.
You're a kind man.

1171
01:07:36,600 --> 01:07:38,400
Don't touch me.

1172
01:07:38,600 --> 01:07:39,800
I'm not a kind man.

1173
01:07:39,900 --> 01:07:41,600
I'm not your friend
or your brother.

1174
01:07:41,700 --> 01:07:43,200
so dream on!

1175
01:07:44,900 --> 01:07:46,900
You'd let your brother
sleep outside?

1176
01:07:47,000 --> 01:07:48,800
He's not my brother!

1177
01:07:49,000 --> 01:07:49,900
I never saw him!

1178
01:07:50,000 --> 01:07:52,500
so he can sleep
Where the hell he wants!

1179
01:07:53,000 --> 01:07:54,300
You're so obscene!

1180
01:07:54,500 --> 01:07:55,500
Excuse me, ma'am.

1181
01:07:55,600 --> 01:07:57,700
I'm taking
President Bernay his tea.

1182
01:07:57,800 --> 01:07:59,700
What the hell do I care?

1183
01:07:59,800 --> 01:08:00,900
And their deposit?

1184
01:08:01,200 --> 01:08:02,600
No, l...

1185
01:08:03,200 --> 01:08:05,300
You can't stay.
It's very pricey.

1186
01:08:05,600 --> 01:08:09,500
The Count of Montmirail
sleep'st at Montmirail.

1187
01:08:12,100 --> 01:08:13,600
Keep your rotten coins.

1188
01:08:14,700 --> 01:08:15,900
Outside, scuzzballs.

1189
01:08:17,000 --> 01:08:19,000
Relax, Jacques.
Put it on my visa.

1190
01:08:19,100 --> 01:08:22,300
If Hub feels at home here,
it may jog his memory.

1191
01:08:22,500 --> 01:08:23,400
It's worth trying.

1192
01:08:23,600 --> 01:08:27,400
Whatever you say. If you want
to pay top price, be my guest.

1193
01:08:27,400 --> 01:08:28,800
You want my picture?

1194
01:08:29,500 --> 01:08:32,100
Don't stand there.
show them to their room.

1195
01:08:32,400 --> 01:08:33,100
This way, Beatrice.

1196
01:08:35,800 --> 01:08:40,400
sparks are flying!
The boss is angry at his brother.

1197
01:08:40,300 --> 01:08:42,100
This is the Godefroy Hardy suite.

1198
01:08:42,300 --> 01:08:44,000
The 1 0th century chimney is...

1199
01:08:44,200 --> 01:08:45,800
a vestige of the watch-tower.

1200
01:08:45,900 --> 01:08:48,100
Zounds! It's different!

1201
01:08:48,200 --> 01:08:49,300
Excuse me?

1202
01:08:49,500 --> 01:08:50,400
Leave us, wretch.

1203
01:08:51,600 --> 01:08:52,300
What?

1204
01:08:53,200 --> 01:08:54,600
The Book of spells.

1205
01:08:57,500 --> 01:09:00,400
Holy scrotums!
You look drunk as a skunk!

1206
01:09:00,600 --> 01:09:02,100
Is that me?

1207
01:09:02,300 --> 01:09:03,600
That's an old fool!

1208
01:09:08,600 --> 01:09:10,000
Who's this monster?

1209
01:09:13,900 --> 01:09:15,400
Gonzague de Montmirail.

1210
01:09:15,500 --> 01:09:17,400
The Count Who helped the peasants?

1211
01:09:17,500 --> 01:09:18,700
A foul creature.

1212
01:09:18,900 --> 01:09:21,300
Nay, a saintly man.

1213
01:09:22,100 --> 01:09:23,700
Come.

1214
01:09:37,500 --> 01:09:38,700
what are you doing?

1215
01:09:46,400 --> 01:09:47,800
Jean-Pierre, don't scream.

1216
01:09:47,900 --> 01:09:48,600
I'm not screaming.

1217
01:09:48,900 --> 01:09:50,700
It's expensive, but it's for Hub.

1218
01:09:50,800 --> 01:09:54,700
Two rooms at 2600, plus the suite
at 3600, comes to 6200 francs a day.

1219
01:09:54,800 --> 01:09:55,700
Breakfast included.

1220
01:09:55,900 --> 01:09:56,800
How much?

1221
01:09:57,000 --> 01:09:58,900
Why three rooms?

1222
01:09:59,000 --> 01:10:00,400
I can't leave him.

1223
01:10:00,500 --> 01:10:01,100
Ridiculous!

1224
01:10:01,400 --> 01:10:02,800
so I took a third room.

1225
01:10:02,900 --> 01:10:03,700
You're staying?

1226
01:10:03,900 --> 01:10:05,700
Hurry. I have other things to do.

1227
01:10:05,800 --> 01:10:08,800
- Bea, you can't do this.
- Okay, toodle-oo.

1228
01:10:16,500 --> 01:10:17,900
The torches are rotten.

1229
01:10:18,100 --> 01:10:19,300
sire, I'm scared.

1230
01:10:21,100 --> 01:10:22,000
What are you doing?

1231
01:10:22,200 --> 01:10:26,800
They called me a wretch
and threw me out. Then I heard a noise.

1232
01:10:26,800 --> 01:10:29,300
Open this door immediately!

1233
01:10:29,400 --> 01:10:30,800
Hub!

1234
01:10:36,100 --> 01:10:37,900
Cousin Hubert!

1235
01:10:38,300 --> 01:10:40,100
Mr. Kass!

1236
01:10:40,200 --> 01:10:42,400
They lit a fire!
There's soot everywhere.

1237
01:10:42,800 --> 01:10:44,800
You'll pay the dry cleaner!

1238
01:10:47,500 --> 01:10:48,500
They're not here.

1239
01:10:48,700 --> 01:10:49,900
Jacqueline, did they leave?

1240
01:10:50,100 --> 01:10:52,700
No, sir. I swear.

1241
01:10:52,800 --> 01:10:54,300
Don't start blubbering.

1242
01:10:54,500 --> 01:10:55,400
That won't help.

1243
01:10:55,900 --> 01:10:57,600
His friend's room.

1244
01:11:06,400 --> 01:11:07,900
Where did you come from?

1245
01:11:08,000 --> 01:11:09,600
Hub, what happened to you?

1246
01:11:09,700 --> 01:11:10,600
I need a torch.

1247
01:11:10,800 --> 01:11:12,800
Why were you hiding
in the chimney?

1248
01:11:12,900 --> 01:11:14,000
The Book of...

1249
01:11:14,200 --> 01:11:16,600
We were here. Just visiting.

1250
01:11:16,800 --> 01:11:19,400
visiting.... You were
visiting the chimney?

1251
01:11:19,500 --> 01:11:24,000
We wanted a fire. A soot ball
was blocking the flue. so Jacquasse,

1252
01:11:23,900 --> 01:11:25,900
climbed on my shoulder.

1253
01:11:26,000 --> 01:11:27,800
I started climbing up...

1254
01:11:27,900 --> 01:11:29,600
And we slipped.

1255
01:11:29,800 --> 01:11:30,400
Everything fell.

1256
01:11:30,700 --> 01:11:34,300
No need to explain, Hub.
At 6200 francs a night,

1257
01:11:34,300 --> 01:11:36,600
We can expect
the chimney to be swept.

1258
01:11:36,700 --> 01:11:39,600
There was no soot ball!

1259
01:11:40,100 --> 01:11:41,600
There's nothing!

1260
01:11:44,700 --> 01:11:46,600
Come on.

1261
01:11:48,700 --> 01:11:52,000
Jacqueline, call the roofer.
Tell him I refuse to pay the bill.

1262
01:11:52,100 --> 01:11:54,000
Not if he leaves soot balls!

1263
01:11:54,100 --> 01:11:56,400
Hub, you've got
some explaining to do.

1264
01:11:56,600 --> 01:12:00,400
I am not Cousin Hubert.
I am Godefroy The Hardy.

1265
01:12:00,400 --> 01:12:03,100
I was born
in the year of our Lord 1 079.

1266
01:12:03,300 --> 01:12:07,100
I'm Jacquasse The Crass, his vassal.
I know not my date of birth.

1267
01:12:07,100 --> 01:12:12,300
You're Godefroy, he's Joan of Arc,
and I'm the Queen of England. Okay?

1268
01:12:12,500 --> 01:12:13,100
Okkk ayyy!

1269
01:12:13,200 --> 01:12:14,200
This is the Hardy.

1270
01:12:14,400 --> 01:12:17,400
Despite a vague resemblance,
he was a fat, hairy macho

1271
01:12:17,500 --> 01:12:21,000
Who must have had
chronic halitosis... You know...

1272
01:12:21,400 --> 01:12:23,100
Okkk ayyy!

1273
01:12:23,300 --> 01:12:25,400
what are you doing here?

1274
01:12:25,500 --> 01:12:28,900
I asked for a torch.
Make haste!

1275
01:12:30,500 --> 01:12:32,600
Hubert, stop telling
tall tales.

1276
01:12:33,100 --> 01:12:35,900
And what, pray tell, is this?

1277
01:12:36,400 --> 01:12:38,000
Mere trickery?

1278
01:12:38,300 --> 01:12:39,200
Hub!

1279
01:12:40,200 --> 01:12:42,000
You knew where the dungeon was?

1280
01:12:42,100 --> 01:12:44,300
Maybe we'll find
the Montmirail treasure.

1281
01:12:46,400 --> 01:12:47,900
It's pitch black.

1282
01:12:48,000 --> 01:12:50,800
I'll get my flashlight.
stay put.

1283
01:13:09,000 --> 01:13:09,800
Yes?

1284
01:13:09,900 --> 01:13:11,000
The torches died.

1285
01:13:12,200 --> 01:13:13,100
Can I help you?

1286
01:13:17,100 --> 01:13:19,000
what on earth happened here?

1287
01:13:20,500 --> 01:13:22,400
who is responsible for this?

1288
01:13:22,500 --> 01:13:24,100
'Tis a piece o' rubbish!

1289
01:13:24,200 --> 01:13:25,600
You can say that again.

1290
01:13:25,900 --> 01:13:29,700
If your brother sees this,
it won't be a picnic.

1291
01:13:29,700 --> 01:13:31,300
Cousin Hubert needs a torch.

1292
01:13:31,400 --> 01:13:32,800
A flashlight.
I'll get you one.

1293
01:13:33,500 --> 01:13:34,500
Okkk ayyy!

1294
01:13:37,400 --> 01:13:39,900
Halogen flashlights.
A total must.

1295
01:13:42,100 --> 01:13:43,300
Could someone

1296
01:13:43,400 --> 01:13:45,700
serve me a scotch?

1297
01:13:45,800 --> 01:13:48,100
I need a drink
before the other brother

1298
01:13:48,300 --> 01:13:50,000
arrives to finish the seminar.

1299
01:13:50,100 --> 01:13:50,900
Edgar and Edouard together...

1300
01:13:51,000 --> 01:13:52,100
aren't easy.

1301
01:13:52,400 --> 01:13:53,700
I'm waiting for sire's torch.

1302
01:13:53,800 --> 01:13:54,700
sire?

1303
01:13:56,100 --> 01:13:57,000
Cousin Hubert.

1304
01:13:57,100 --> 01:13:59,200
Hubert de Montmirail
is your cousin?

1305
01:14:00,200 --> 01:14:01,000
How amazing.

1306
01:14:01,200 --> 01:14:02,900
so Jacquart is their cousin too?

1307
01:14:03,400 --> 01:14:04,900
Nay nay nay!

1308
01:14:05,000 --> 01:14:06,900
Aren't you Jacquart's brother?

1309
01:14:07,000 --> 01:14:07,700
No.

1310
01:14:08,700 --> 01:14:10,300
Your mother isn't his mother?

1311
01:14:11,200 --> 01:14:12,400
My mother was Gwendolyne.

1312
01:14:12,700 --> 01:14:14,200
she was devoured by woIves,

1313
01:14:14,600 --> 01:14:17,200
because my father,
on his way to the tavern,

1314
01:14:17,400 --> 01:14:20,400
fell in the icy lake
due to his club foot.

1315
01:14:22,000 --> 01:14:22,800
How awful!

1316
01:14:24,500 --> 01:14:25,300
How freaky!

1317
01:14:25,800 --> 01:14:26,600
Freakkky!

1318
01:14:26,800 --> 01:14:28,600
If I understand correctly,

1319
01:14:28,800 --> 01:14:30,200
you're Jacquart's half-brother.

1320
01:14:31,700 --> 01:14:33,800
Freakkky! Okkk ayyy!

1321
01:14:33,900 --> 01:14:34,800
Freakkky!

1322
01:14:35,200 --> 01:14:36,400
Freakkky!

1323
01:14:37,200 --> 01:14:39,500
Yes, it sure is freaky.

1324
01:14:40,500 --> 01:14:42,100
Jacquart is so secretive.

1325
01:14:42,200 --> 01:14:44,600
There's no shame in having
a handicapped father.

1326
01:14:45,100 --> 01:14:46,900
Okkk ayyy!

1327
01:14:48,400 --> 01:14:50,000
sorry for your father.

1328
01:14:50,100 --> 01:14:51,500
Thank you.

1329
01:14:52,000 --> 01:14:54,400
why did that idiot
mention my father?

1330
01:14:55,800 --> 01:14:59,200
what are you doing in the garbage,
you dirty thief?

1331
01:14:59,500 --> 01:15:00,400
Come here.

1332
01:15:00,500 --> 01:15:04,100
Let go of me, sleazeball.
I'm a Chernobyl victim.

1333
01:15:04,100 --> 01:15:05,200
save it for the cops.

1334
01:15:06,100 --> 01:15:08,000
Lady Ginette!
Release her, peasant.

1335
01:15:08,700 --> 01:15:10,000
Lady Ginette is my friend.

1336
01:15:10,900 --> 01:15:12,900
- she is a friend of yours?
- Yes.

1337
01:15:13,000 --> 01:15:15,600
she is good-hearted.
she is welcome here.

1338
01:15:15,800 --> 01:15:19,000
As you like, sir.
Her head was in the garbage bin.

1339
01:15:19,000 --> 01:15:22,400
If you rummaged in garbage heaps,
you'd have a nicer bow-tie.

1340
01:15:24,000 --> 01:15:25,900
People with money to burn

1341
01:15:26,000 --> 01:15:27,600
dump lots of great stuff.

1342
01:15:27,800 --> 01:15:29,900
Like I found these great stockings.

1343
01:15:33,700 --> 01:15:35,700
what a ripe apple!

1344
01:15:38,000 --> 01:15:39,700
You're letting them in?

1345
01:15:39,800 --> 01:15:42,400
stow it. she's the boss's
brother's broad.

1346
01:15:42,600 --> 01:15:43,800
They'll kick us out.

1347
01:15:43,900 --> 01:15:46,900
Fear not.
The castle belongs to my family.

1348
01:15:47,000 --> 01:15:47,900
No way!

1349
01:15:48,100 --> 01:15:49,600
I'll give you a tour.

1350
01:15:51,700 --> 01:15:53,200
Ladies and Gents.

1351
01:15:55,800 --> 01:15:57,200
That's the office.

1352
01:15:57,300 --> 01:15:59,500
Hold your tongue, wretch.
It is my youngling's office.

1353
01:15:59,700 --> 01:16:01,400
He is kindred.

1354
01:16:05,100 --> 01:16:06,900
what the hell is this?

1355
01:16:08,200 --> 01:16:11,600
Jacqueline, what happened
in the halIway?

1356
01:16:12,400 --> 01:16:13,300
It's your "youngling", sir.

1357
01:16:14,200 --> 01:16:17,300
Those garbage heaps
fall apart if you sneeze.

1358
01:16:17,400 --> 01:16:19,400
worry not. 'Tis my specialty.

1359
01:16:21,500 --> 01:16:22,800
It needs oil.

1360
01:16:22,900 --> 01:16:24,900
who let you in?
It's private here.

1361
01:16:25,100 --> 01:16:28,800
I'm showing our castle to Lady Ginette.
This is my youngling.

1362
01:16:28,800 --> 01:16:29,400
Hi youngling.

1363
01:16:29,700 --> 01:16:31,400
she scuzzed up the Persian rug.

1364
01:16:31,500 --> 01:16:32,200
The game's over.

1365
01:16:32,400 --> 01:16:34,100
Get out,
or I'll call the cops.

1366
01:16:34,300 --> 01:16:36,300
But you're my youngling.

1367
01:16:36,400 --> 01:16:37,200
I love you.

1368
01:16:37,400 --> 01:16:39,200
Thy success makes me proud.

1369
01:16:39,300 --> 01:16:40,500
Let go, scum.

1370
01:16:40,600 --> 01:16:41,600
Freddy, get the dog.

1371
01:16:41,800 --> 01:16:42,500
Brutus?

1372
01:16:42,700 --> 01:16:43,900
There are guests here.

1373
01:16:44,100 --> 01:16:45,200
I don't care!

1374
01:16:45,700 --> 01:16:47,700
Calm thyself, youngling.
we're kin.

1375
01:16:47,900 --> 01:16:48,800
Chill out.

1376
01:16:48,900 --> 01:16:50,600
Enough!

1377
01:16:51,900 --> 01:16:53,000
Freddy, let him loose.

1378
01:16:57,900 --> 01:17:00,500
You flubbed.
That's not the way out.

1379
01:17:00,500 --> 01:17:02,700
we must find the chapel.
My treasure!

1380
01:17:03,700 --> 01:17:05,300
He'll bite off
our family jewels!

1381
01:17:05,900 --> 01:17:09,400
The chapel! The chapel!
The ruined abbey!

1382
01:17:31,100 --> 01:17:32,500
welcome, Mr. Bernay.

1383
01:17:33,100 --> 01:17:34,400
Long trip.

1384
01:17:37,000 --> 01:17:38,200
Holy smoke!

1385
01:17:43,100 --> 01:17:45,200
Holy Moses! You're loaded.

1386
01:17:48,900 --> 01:17:50,100
what about the pooch?

1387
01:17:50,200 --> 01:17:50,800
Your purse.

1388
01:17:52,000 --> 01:17:53,700
we'll trap him.

1389
01:18:17,000 --> 01:18:18,000
I know him not.

1390
01:18:18,200 --> 01:18:19,600
surely one of our enemies.

1391
01:18:37,100 --> 01:18:38,600
My youngling!

1392
01:18:39,600 --> 01:18:41,300
Help!

1393
01:18:43,200 --> 01:18:44,400
Hold on, youngling.

1394
01:18:54,000 --> 01:18:56,800
- without you, I'd have died.
- Indeed.

1395
01:19:01,700 --> 01:19:02,800
Leeches.

1396
01:19:03,900 --> 01:19:06,200
serpent tongues. Rotten fish.

1397
01:19:06,400 --> 01:19:09,000
All the old wizard's potions.

1398
01:19:09,100 --> 01:19:10,700
A book!
The treasure is near.

1399
01:19:11,100 --> 01:19:12,100
The Book of spells.

1400
01:19:19,300 --> 01:19:20,100
All is lost.

1401
01:19:27,700 --> 01:19:29,000
That just opened.

1402
01:19:29,400 --> 01:19:31,900
I'm a little scared.

1403
01:19:34,100 --> 01:19:37,500
Nothing ventured, nothing gained.
I'll go first.

1404
01:19:41,000 --> 01:19:41,800
My youngling!

1405
01:19:45,100 --> 01:19:47,200
Hub! Give me some slack.

1406
01:19:47,800 --> 01:19:50,500
Hub, help me!

1407
01:19:53,200 --> 01:19:54,300
Is there a Book?

1408
01:19:56,200 --> 01:19:57,400
- My God!
- what is it?

1409
01:19:57,600 --> 01:19:58,500
There's a note.

1410
01:20:00,600 --> 01:20:02,200
Godefroy de Montmirail.
If you make it here,

1411
01:20:02,300 --> 01:20:05,100
call immediately,
during office hours, 68 77 79.

1412
01:20:05,200 --> 01:20:06,700
Ask for Mr. Ferdinand.

1413
01:20:12,200 --> 01:20:13,700
In here.

1414
01:20:13,900 --> 01:20:15,300
Not you. Only the man.

1415
01:20:15,400 --> 01:20:16,800
- wait.
- sorry, youngling.

1416
01:20:16,900 --> 01:20:17,700
I wanted...

1417
01:20:19,100 --> 01:20:19,700
Great.

1418
01:20:22,100 --> 01:20:24,500
Come closer.
Godefroy de Montmirail?

1419
01:20:24,600 --> 01:20:26,600
The first Count to bear that name?

1420
01:20:26,900 --> 01:20:27,500
Yes, 'tis l.

1421
01:20:27,700 --> 01:20:29,400
I've been waiting 30 years.

1422
01:20:30,000 --> 01:20:30,700
who are you?

1423
01:20:30,900 --> 01:20:34,300
I am the descendant
of the wizard Eusaebius.

1424
01:20:34,400 --> 01:20:36,800
I am charged
to send you back in time,

1425
01:20:36,900 --> 01:20:40,300
so you can save the life of Eusaebius,
who is at this very moment...

1426
01:20:40,400 --> 01:20:41,800
being horribly tortured.

1427
01:20:42,300 --> 01:20:45,400
I prepared the potion,
following the recipe

1428
01:20:45,500 --> 01:20:48,200
in my ancestor's Book of spells.

1429
01:20:48,300 --> 01:20:51,400
Leave that.
The potion is on the shelf.

1430
01:20:56,500 --> 01:20:58,600
The same ghastly odor.

1431
01:20:59,000 --> 01:21:01,000
My ancestor's diary

1432
01:21:01,200 --> 01:21:03,000
mentions your companion.

1433
01:21:03,100 --> 01:21:05,300
- where is he?
- At the castle.

1434
01:21:05,400 --> 01:21:06,800
You must leave with him

1435
01:21:06,900 --> 01:21:10,700
before midnight. Or else,
you'll have to wait 33 years.

1436
01:21:10,800 --> 01:21:13,100
If you don't return to your past,

1437
01:21:13,200 --> 01:21:15,100
another future will take form,

1438
01:21:15,300 --> 01:21:17,200
in which you have no descendants,

1439
01:21:17,600 --> 01:21:20,600
because you never
married and fathered children.

1440
01:21:23,800 --> 01:21:24,400
so?

1441
01:21:24,600 --> 01:21:26,300
what was the big secret?

1442
01:21:26,500 --> 01:21:27,800
Let's return to the castle.

1443
01:21:39,000 --> 01:21:40,500
The chariot that arrested me.

1444
01:21:41,000 --> 01:21:42,700
why the ambulance?

1445
01:21:42,900 --> 01:21:45,000
Ma'am, hurry. It's your husband.

1446
01:21:45,100 --> 01:21:46,200
Jean-Pierre?

1447
01:21:46,400 --> 01:21:49,300
He was furious
that you had hung up on him.

1448
01:21:49,500 --> 01:21:52,300
Then the dog bit him.
Come this way.

1449
01:21:56,100 --> 01:21:57,500
Jean-Pierre, what happened?

1450
01:21:57,600 --> 01:22:00,900
Jacquart's dog bit me
while I was paying the taxi.

1451
01:22:01,300 --> 01:22:04,000
Your husband is baring his ass
to this woman.

1452
01:22:04,400 --> 01:22:06,300
she's caressing his bun'lings.

1453
01:22:06,600 --> 01:22:08,900
she's giving him a shot. OK?

1454
01:22:08,900 --> 01:22:10,000
Get him out.

1455
01:22:10,200 --> 01:22:11,900
I want my shot in peace.

1456
01:22:14,000 --> 01:22:14,800
Excuse me, doctor.

1457
01:22:14,900 --> 01:22:16,300
Excuse us.

1458
01:22:16,500 --> 01:22:18,300
Is this Grand Central station?
I should charge admission!

1459
01:22:18,500 --> 01:22:19,400
You're here.

1460
01:22:19,700 --> 01:22:20,300
Yes.

1461
01:22:20,900 --> 01:22:25,400
Did Brutus attack for no reason,
or did you excite him first?

1462
01:22:25,900 --> 01:22:26,600
Excite who?

1463
01:22:26,900 --> 01:22:29,200
Excuse me.
The dentist hurt himself?

1464
01:22:30,100 --> 01:22:32,200
I'm sick of having
my ass stared at.

1465
01:22:33,600 --> 01:22:36,700
Jean-Pierre, you're paranoid.
No one is staring.

1466
01:22:37,900 --> 01:22:40,800
I have a phone call
for Cousin Hubert.

1467
01:22:41,200 --> 01:22:42,800
Godefroy?

1468
01:22:47,600 --> 01:22:49,000
Monijoie!

1469
01:22:49,600 --> 01:22:53,900
It's Jacquasse, Godefroy.
No use shouting at the little box.

1470
01:22:55,300 --> 01:22:57,000
stop screaming!

1471
01:22:59,200 --> 01:23:02,300
speak calmly
into the little holes.

1472
01:23:02,300 --> 01:23:03,200
where are you, peasant?

1473
01:23:03,400 --> 01:23:07,200
Bowling Alley. with Lady Ginette.
And I'm no longer a peasant.

1474
01:23:07,400 --> 01:23:08,100
Yo, Jacky.

1475
01:23:08,200 --> 01:23:11,000
I roll the ball.
I'm having a ball!

1476
01:23:14,900 --> 01:23:16,600
we're having balls.

1477
01:23:17,500 --> 01:23:18,500
You were a good master,
Godefroy.

1478
01:23:18,900 --> 01:23:20,200
sire Godefroy!

1479
01:23:20,300 --> 01:23:21,000
Yes, Godefroy.

1480
01:23:21,900 --> 01:23:24,700
The best master.
Better than Montfaucon.

1481
01:23:25,700 --> 01:23:26,500
One minute, vassal.

1482
01:23:26,600 --> 01:23:28,200
No vassal.
No more vassals.

1483
01:23:28,300 --> 01:23:30,800
Leave your Lord alone,
peasants.

1484
01:23:32,000 --> 01:23:33,600
who does he think he is?

1485
01:23:33,700 --> 01:23:35,500
Peasants?
what does he mean?

1486
01:23:36,000 --> 01:23:36,600
Problem, chief?

1487
01:23:36,800 --> 01:23:38,100
No.

1488
01:23:38,700 --> 01:23:39,400
Listen up.

1489
01:23:39,800 --> 01:23:41,700
- we can go home.
- Home?

1490
01:23:41,900 --> 01:23:43,100
Beer and Pernod?

1491
01:23:43,200 --> 01:23:44,300
Godefroy, I'm staying.

1492
01:23:44,500 --> 01:23:46,600
The beer and the Pernod:
are they for you?

1493
01:23:46,600 --> 01:23:47,800
Okkk ayyy.

1494
01:23:49,200 --> 01:23:50,300
Lady Ginette proposed to me.

1495
01:23:50,900 --> 01:23:51,700
who's the bozo?

1496
01:23:52,000 --> 01:23:54,000
A lounge lizard
with that floozy.

1497
01:23:54,500 --> 01:23:56,900
she's wearing high heels.

1498
01:23:57,000 --> 01:23:58,100
Come back!

1499
01:23:58,500 --> 01:24:00,300
Best wishes to Lady Frenegonde.

1500
01:24:00,400 --> 01:24:02,500
I'll miss you,
but I'm too happy here.

1501
01:24:02,600 --> 01:24:05,500
You lunatic!
There's nothing for us here.

1502
01:24:06,300 --> 01:24:07,400
I'll make do.

1503
01:24:07,500 --> 01:24:08,800
You're wearing goddamned boots!

1504
01:24:09,100 --> 01:24:11,900
Let me go!
I don't want your scummy shoes!

1505
01:24:11,900 --> 01:24:13,800
Return here hastily.

1506
01:24:13,900 --> 01:24:14,600
I refuse.

1507
01:24:15,100 --> 01:24:18,100
very well. whatever you say.

1508
01:24:18,100 --> 01:24:19,000
You're not angry?

1509
01:24:19,300 --> 01:24:20,000
No.

1510
01:24:20,700 --> 01:24:21,900
we all must die.

1511
01:24:23,300 --> 01:24:26,200
Yes, I must warn you, Crass One.

1512
01:24:26,300 --> 01:24:28,300
I happened upon a wizard today.

1513
01:24:28,400 --> 01:24:32,500
He told me if you didn't return
before the full moon,

1514
01:24:32,600 --> 01:24:33,900
your innards would rot.

1515
01:24:34,100 --> 01:24:35,500
You'll die in great pain.

1516
01:24:36,400 --> 01:24:38,800
I don't believe you.
You want to scare me.

1517
01:24:39,500 --> 01:24:41,100
You're already rotting.

1518
01:24:41,600 --> 01:24:44,400
Take as proof
the fetid odor in your mouth.

1519
01:24:45,800 --> 01:24:47,200
Come back before tweIve,

1520
01:24:47,900 --> 01:24:48,600
or else,

1521
01:24:49,100 --> 01:24:50,100
farewell.

1522
01:24:50,200 --> 01:24:52,700
sire Godefroy. sire Godefroy.

1523
01:24:58,100 --> 01:25:01,200
Excuse my abruptness,
but I'm o'erjoyed to return home.

1524
01:25:01,300 --> 01:25:02,000
Leaving already?

1525
01:25:02,800 --> 01:25:03,400
How nice.

1526
01:25:03,600 --> 01:25:05,000
where do you live exactly?

1527
01:25:05,800 --> 01:25:06,400
Home.

1528
01:25:08,200 --> 01:25:09,400
where is "home"?

1529
01:25:09,500 --> 01:25:11,400
Here and there.
You couldn't understand.

1530
01:25:12,600 --> 01:25:14,100
They're plotting something.

1531
01:25:14,300 --> 01:25:16,400
They were nosing around the chimney.

1532
01:25:16,500 --> 01:25:17,900
Really...

1533
01:25:18,000 --> 01:25:21,400
I'll conduct an investigation
concerning your strange guest.

1534
01:25:21,400 --> 01:25:22,500
Peasant, come here.

1535
01:25:28,200 --> 01:25:30,200
what the hell, ass-breath!

1536
01:25:30,300 --> 01:25:32,000
You smell like a dead skunk!

1537
01:25:35,500 --> 01:25:36,400
where is Lady Beatrice?

1538
01:25:36,600 --> 01:25:37,900
she's upstairs changing.

1539
01:25:38,200 --> 01:25:41,100
Your cousin has agreed
to dine with Mr. Bernay

1540
01:25:41,100 --> 01:25:42,400
of the Bernay and Bernay Bank.

1541
01:25:42,800 --> 01:25:45,700
Our bank has aIways
appreciated the aristocracy.

1542
01:25:45,900 --> 01:25:48,700
May the Lord bless you,
kind Bernay and Bernay.

1543
01:25:49,500 --> 01:25:50,600
Is he teasing me?

1544
01:25:50,800 --> 01:25:51,900
I doubt it.

1545
01:25:57,300 --> 01:25:59,600
To think my ancestors
built all this!

1546
01:25:59,700 --> 01:26:02,400
- That dungeon is to die for!
- we almost did.

1547
01:26:02,600 --> 01:26:05,100
- what were you doing?
- I was showing...

1548
01:26:05,200 --> 01:26:07,500
my all-too-logical husband
how we almost

1549
01:26:07,600 --> 01:26:08,800
found the treasure.

1550
01:26:09,100 --> 01:26:10,500
You played doctor there?

1551
01:26:11,300 --> 01:26:13,000
Leave me now.

1552
01:26:16,800 --> 01:26:18,400
You called me, Mr. Bernay?

1553
01:26:19,300 --> 01:26:20,300
Tell me, Jacquart,

1554
01:26:21,200 --> 01:26:22,700
is your cousin Montmirail

1555
01:26:22,900 --> 01:26:24,900
a little la-dee-dah-ish?

1556
01:26:25,000 --> 01:26:26,300
what is la-dee-dah-ish?

1557
01:26:26,600 --> 01:26:30,400
Anyone can have a gay cousin
and an alcoholic father.

1558
01:26:31,100 --> 01:26:33,200
There's no cause for embarrassment.

1559
01:26:33,300 --> 01:26:35,700
who are you to insult
my happily-retired father?

1560
01:26:35,800 --> 01:26:37,600
Do I ask if your father farts?

1561
01:26:37,700 --> 01:26:39,800
Or if your wife boozes it up
in the closet?

1562
01:26:40,700 --> 01:26:43,200
Talking about his family
is a major taboo.

1563
01:26:46,700 --> 01:26:47,900
You know the dungeon?

1564
01:26:48,600 --> 01:26:49,400
what is this?

1565
01:26:50,300 --> 01:26:52,900
You entered my chamber
without requesting audience?

1566
01:26:53,000 --> 01:26:55,800
Anything found in the dungeon
belongs to the hotel.

1567
01:26:56,100 --> 01:26:57,300
whatever it's worth.

1568
01:26:57,600 --> 01:26:59,000
what is that? Crack?

1569
01:26:59,100 --> 01:27:00,100
LsD?

1570
01:27:00,300 --> 01:27:02,400
Hand it over.
I'll have it analyzed.

1571
01:27:04,600 --> 01:27:06,300
No tricks! I'm armed!

1572
01:27:08,600 --> 01:27:11,000
Hilda? still there? Lucky me.

1573
01:27:11,200 --> 01:27:14,600
Jump in a taxi and bring me
my black cocktail dress.

1574
01:27:14,700 --> 01:27:15,900
we have a dinner.

1575
01:27:16,400 --> 01:27:17,500
Hub, knock first!

1576
01:27:19,200 --> 01:27:20,200
The little red balls.

1577
01:27:22,800 --> 01:27:23,600
what now?

1578
01:27:23,700 --> 01:27:25,600
You want a tranquilizer, Hub?

1579
01:27:25,900 --> 01:27:26,700
what's wrong?

1580
01:27:27,500 --> 01:27:30,400
He's making progress.
He realizes he's cracking up.

1581
01:27:30,600 --> 01:27:32,000
Maybe he'll ask to be locked up.

1582
01:27:32,100 --> 01:27:34,000
I am totally disappointed in you.

1583
01:27:34,800 --> 01:27:35,600
I swear.

1584
01:27:36,200 --> 01:27:37,400
Free us immediately.

1585
01:27:37,600 --> 01:27:39,200
I'll reduce the sentence.

1586
01:27:39,300 --> 01:27:41,700
- swallow, peasant.
- Enough's enough.

1587
01:27:44,900 --> 01:27:47,200
Don't bother with me.
I'll keep quiet.

1588
01:27:47,300 --> 01:27:49,200
- Is your cousin Hubert joining us?
- soon.

1589
01:27:51,000 --> 01:27:52,900
They stop serving at 9:30.

1590
01:27:53,000 --> 01:27:54,000
Countess.

1591
01:28:07,900 --> 01:28:08,900
Let us eat.

1592
01:28:11,800 --> 01:28:14,300
Did you know this dungeon existed?

1593
01:28:14,400 --> 01:28:16,100
Of course not!

1594
01:28:16,800 --> 01:28:17,700
Help!

1595
01:28:18,100 --> 01:28:19,400
where is sergeant-Major Gibon?

1596
01:28:19,600 --> 01:28:21,400
with Jacques-Henri.
Go have a drink.

1597
01:28:21,600 --> 01:28:22,500
On the house.

1598
01:28:24,700 --> 01:28:27,100
'Twas much more hospitable
in the past.

1599
01:28:27,200 --> 01:28:29,200
we burned entire trees.

1600
01:28:29,300 --> 01:28:32,100
The walls and floors
were covered with rugs.

1601
01:28:32,200 --> 01:28:36,700
Not an evening went by without
jugglers, minstrels, and trollops.

1602
01:28:37,700 --> 01:28:39,300
I remember one evening,

1603
01:28:39,400 --> 01:28:42,900
the fire-eater set afire
Lady Flegmonde's wig.

1604
01:28:43,000 --> 01:28:46,300
we had to throw her
into the icy moat, fully-dressed.

1605
01:28:46,800 --> 01:28:48,600
Family souvenirs are so vivid.

1606
01:28:51,500 --> 01:28:54,600
He tells them so well.
You feel you're there.

1607
01:28:55,100 --> 01:28:55,800
where?

1608
01:28:56,900 --> 01:28:59,000
Isn't he the bum from the church?

1609
01:29:04,300 --> 01:29:06,000
Are you okay, sugardaddy?

1610
01:29:06,100 --> 01:29:08,100
I'm still not used
to this jalopy.

1611
01:29:08,400 --> 01:29:09,300
Evening, wench.

1612
01:29:09,500 --> 01:29:10,300
Hiya Missy.

1613
01:29:10,500 --> 01:29:11,400
sir, ma'am...

1614
01:29:11,500 --> 01:29:12,700
where's Mr. Godefroy,

1615
01:29:13,000 --> 01:29:14,200
dammit?

1616
01:29:15,200 --> 01:29:15,900
There.

1617
01:29:16,200 --> 01:29:17,300
Ladies and Gents.

1618
01:29:18,500 --> 01:29:20,600
Good evening, ma'am.
Good evening, sir.

1619
01:29:25,600 --> 01:29:28,800
My Jacquasse. You came.
I am relieved.

1620
01:29:28,900 --> 01:29:29,700
Ladies and Gents.

1621
01:29:29,800 --> 01:29:30,600
Mr. Goulard.

1622
01:29:31,300 --> 01:29:33,500
Come drink to our friends, my Crass.

1623
01:29:34,100 --> 01:29:35,700
Before we leave.

1624
01:29:35,900 --> 01:29:36,600
when is that?

1625
01:29:36,900 --> 01:29:37,800
This evening.

1626
01:29:38,000 --> 01:29:39,800
- Tonight?
- Traveling by night?

1627
01:29:40,300 --> 01:29:41,400
Indeed.

1628
01:29:41,800 --> 01:29:44,700
I prefer night-driving.
I have 20/20 vision.

1629
01:29:44,800 --> 01:29:46,700
There are fewer road hogs.

1630
01:29:46,800 --> 01:29:48,000
Except in the fog.

1631
01:29:48,200 --> 01:29:49,900
I'm a helicopter-man myself.

1632
01:29:54,800 --> 01:29:55,900
I am not going, sire.

1633
01:29:56,400 --> 01:29:57,200
we're getting hitched.

1634
01:29:57,900 --> 01:30:00,300
He's too shy to ask you
to be best man.

1635
01:30:00,300 --> 01:30:03,400
You can stay too.
I have the antidote against rot.

1636
01:30:04,800 --> 01:30:07,300
- Your purse, Ginette.
- Hold on, babe.

1637
01:30:07,700 --> 01:30:09,000
My bag's a mess.

1638
01:30:09,400 --> 01:30:11,500
so much room
you can shit in it!

1639
01:30:11,700 --> 01:30:12,400
what?

1640
01:30:13,300 --> 01:30:14,900
what do you do, Mr...

1641
01:30:15,900 --> 01:30:17,900
Kass, as in... "gas".

1642
01:30:20,100 --> 01:30:22,800
No rot can resist tooth pate!

1643
01:30:23,400 --> 01:30:24,100
what?

1644
01:30:24,500 --> 01:30:25,400
Pearly white!

1645
01:30:34,500 --> 01:30:35,700
How 'bout that?

1646
01:30:36,000 --> 01:30:37,800
That was really gross.

1647
01:30:39,000 --> 01:30:40,200
Enough.

1648
01:30:41,800 --> 01:30:43,500
what are you doing, bruiser?

1649
01:30:43,700 --> 01:30:44,800
Throwing him out.

1650
01:30:45,000 --> 01:30:47,300
Let go of him!

1651
01:30:53,000 --> 01:30:54,100
what's going on?

1652
01:30:57,400 --> 01:30:58,500
Are you okay?

1653
01:31:00,100 --> 01:31:01,200
No, sire!

1654
01:31:08,100 --> 01:31:09,900
You can't force me to go home!

1655
01:31:10,600 --> 01:31:13,200
I'm not a vassal anymore! I'm free!

1656
01:31:13,700 --> 01:31:15,400
Long live the Revolution!

1657
01:31:27,400 --> 01:31:29,000
Look.
He's your youngling too.

1658
01:31:29,100 --> 01:31:31,500
He was a good man.
He knew about justice.

1659
01:31:31,800 --> 01:31:33,600
They cut off his head, peasant.

1660
01:31:33,700 --> 01:31:34,600
Freddy!

1661
01:31:35,000 --> 01:31:37,000
Help!

1662
01:31:37,100 --> 01:31:38,800
who's that?

1663
01:31:38,900 --> 01:31:40,400
Your youngling.

1664
01:31:40,600 --> 01:31:41,500
You jailed him?

1665
01:31:41,800 --> 01:31:44,100
I left it so they'll find him.
Drink!

1666
01:31:47,200 --> 01:31:48,400
I'm in pain!

1667
01:31:53,800 --> 01:31:54,700
Hub, it's Bea.

1668
01:31:57,900 --> 01:31:59,300
what happened to Mr. Kass?

1669
01:31:59,400 --> 01:32:01,100
My God! My belly!

1670
01:32:01,500 --> 01:32:02,600
I have no time. Listen.

1671
01:32:02,800 --> 01:32:04,000
I'm listening, Hubert.

1672
01:32:04,200 --> 01:32:05,700
I'm not Hubert.

1673
01:32:05,800 --> 01:32:07,800
I'm Godefroy Amaury de Malfete,

1674
01:32:07,900 --> 01:32:10,300
Count of Montmirail, of Apremont
and of Popincourt.

1675
01:32:10,500 --> 01:32:14,100
son of Aldebert de Malfete
and Thibaude de Montfaucon.

1676
01:32:15,400 --> 01:32:16,300
I am your ancestor.

1677
01:32:24,600 --> 01:32:25,500
Torch.

1678
01:32:38,200 --> 01:32:40,400
Fred, it's you. Freddy.

1679
01:32:42,700 --> 01:32:44,400
I beg your pardon, youngling.

1680
01:32:54,700 --> 01:32:58,300
I'm sick of your song and dance.
I don't believe a word of it.

1681
01:32:58,500 --> 01:33:00,500
so spill the beans.

1682
01:33:00,600 --> 01:33:02,500
shit! Damn it!

1683
01:33:05,300 --> 01:33:08,900
You don't believe me? I'll show
you something you've never seen.

1684
01:33:09,400 --> 01:33:11,000
That no one has ever seen.

1685
01:33:12,100 --> 01:33:13,800
That you'll never see again.

1686
01:33:15,900 --> 01:33:17,700
sit thyself down, and watch.

1687
01:33:20,400 --> 01:33:22,200
I'm going to vomit.

1688
01:33:28,200 --> 01:33:29,900
Does your tummy ache?

1689
01:33:56,900 --> 01:33:58,800
where is Mr. Kass?

1690
01:33:59,000 --> 01:34:00,600
How did "Jacky" get so rich?

1691
01:34:00,700 --> 01:34:02,300
An antique car is no bargain.

1692
01:34:02,500 --> 01:34:04,700
It's his own personal fortune.

1693
01:34:05,100 --> 01:34:09,500
His family owns this joint.
He wants us to tie the knot.

1694
01:34:09,500 --> 01:34:11,700
why didn't you
tell me from the start?

1695
01:34:12,200 --> 01:34:13,300
I did.

1696
01:34:14,600 --> 01:34:16,100
You wouldn't listen.

1697
01:34:16,900 --> 01:34:19,300
You're right.
I'm sorry Godefroy.

1698
01:34:20,000 --> 01:34:21,500
I'm going, Beatrice.

1699
01:34:21,900 --> 01:34:24,000
I am very happy to have known you.

1700
01:34:24,800 --> 01:34:27,200
Godefroy, I'm so moved.
what can I say?

1701
01:34:27,600 --> 01:34:29,400
we'll never meet again.

1702
01:34:30,300 --> 01:34:33,000
It is so unique
to be able to touch you,

1703
01:34:33,700 --> 01:34:36,800
my youngling,
my ever-so-young youngling.

1704
01:34:38,900 --> 01:34:39,800
You know,

1705
01:34:41,000 --> 01:34:42,700
I lied.

1706
01:34:43,100 --> 01:34:47,400
I was not searching for a treasure,
but for the magic potion.

1707
01:34:47,700 --> 01:34:48,400
Pardon me.

1708
01:34:48,700 --> 01:34:51,400
No treasure can replace
our having met.

1709
01:34:51,500 --> 01:34:52,200
Indeed.

1710
01:34:52,400 --> 01:34:54,900
Nothing can equal
meeting one's descendants.

1711
01:34:59,100 --> 01:34:59,900
Bea? Are you there?

1712
01:35:02,200 --> 01:35:05,100
My life will seem so boring now.

1713
01:35:05,100 --> 01:35:06,700
You must forget me.

1714
01:35:06,900 --> 01:35:08,300
You have your children.

1715
01:35:09,100 --> 01:35:12,300
Give Florian and Ondine
a big kiss from an old ancestor.

1716
01:35:13,800 --> 01:35:16,600
And deep in your soul, keep

1717
01:35:16,600 --> 01:35:18,500
a memory of me.

1718
01:35:20,600 --> 01:35:22,100
I love you, my Beatrice.

1719
01:35:22,400 --> 01:35:23,600
I love you too.

1720
01:35:36,400 --> 01:35:38,500
A secret passage. This way!

1721
01:35:39,200 --> 01:35:40,400
sergeant-Major Gibon?

1722
01:35:40,600 --> 01:35:42,500
Are you okay?
You're not hurt?

1723
01:35:42,800 --> 01:35:43,900
No, Jean-Pierre.

1724
01:35:44,300 --> 01:35:45,600
where did Hubert go?

1725
01:35:45,700 --> 01:35:47,600
You're too rational to understand.

1726
01:35:47,700 --> 01:35:51,700
spare me your lame interpretations.
Answer me, please.

1727
01:35:51,800 --> 01:35:52,800
where is your cousin?

1728
01:35:53,000 --> 01:35:54,900
He left with Mr. Kass.

1729
01:35:57,600 --> 01:35:58,700
Is the sheriff gone?

1730
01:35:58,900 --> 01:36:01,100
what are you saying?
Mr. Kass is here.

1731
01:36:01,300 --> 01:36:02,500
Mr. Kass!

1732
01:36:02,700 --> 01:36:05,700
Hush! I must find Lady Ginette.

1733
01:36:09,200 --> 01:36:11,100
who left with...?

1734
01:36:12,300 --> 01:36:13,000
shit!

1735
01:36:34,500 --> 01:36:35,900
A bear is chasing her!

1736
01:36:38,600 --> 01:36:41,000
steer clear, beloved!
steer clear!

1737
01:36:41,600 --> 01:36:42,400
Come back!

1738
01:36:45,800 --> 01:36:48,300
If you find enough force

1739
01:36:48,400 --> 01:36:50,000
in yourself,

1740
01:36:50,200 --> 01:36:51,500
you will be able

1741
01:36:51,600 --> 01:36:53,400
to change the course of the arrow.

1742
01:37:06,200 --> 01:37:07,000
Holy scrotums!

1743
01:37:07,400 --> 01:37:08,700
You almost pierced'st me!

1744
01:37:09,600 --> 01:37:12,300
slay the father of my lady-love?

1745
01:37:12,400 --> 01:37:14,200
Your absence was an eternity,

1746
01:37:14,400 --> 01:37:15,300
dear Godefroy.

1747
01:37:18,600 --> 01:37:20,100
- It's hard!
- sorry, beloved.

1748
01:37:20,800 --> 01:37:22,700
Jacquasse,
where are you, peasant?

1749
01:37:23,100 --> 01:37:24,500
Fetch my crossbow.

1750
01:37:24,900 --> 01:37:25,700
He's here, sire.

1751
01:37:25,900 --> 01:37:27,500
A-snoring in clown clothes.

1752
01:37:30,900 --> 01:37:32,200
where are we?

1753
01:37:34,600 --> 01:37:35,600
where's Freddy?

1754
01:37:37,600 --> 01:37:39,000
who are you?

1755
01:37:40,900 --> 01:37:43,700
Take my crossbow.
Oil it at the castle.

1756
01:37:43,900 --> 01:37:44,900
what are you doing here?

1757
01:37:45,500 --> 01:37:47,100
Jump in the river.
You stinketh.

1758
01:37:57,200 --> 01:37:59,900
so Crass?
Have you been sucking up wine?

1759
01:38:02,900 --> 01:38:04,600
what the hell is going on?

1760
01:38:05,300 --> 01:38:08,400
Obey your Lord. I don't want
to whip you on his wedding day!

1761
01:38:11,000 --> 01:38:11,800
Indeed!

1762
01:38:13,900 --> 01:38:15,500
Obey hastily, my Jacquasse.

1763
01:38:16,000 --> 01:38:16,800
shit!

1764
01:38:17,600 --> 01:38:19,000
Fuck!

1765
01:38:20,400 --> 01:38:21,600
Freakkky!

1766
01:38:22,900 --> 01:38:23,600
Okkk ayyy!

1767
01:38:25,800 --> 01:38:27,600
Hand over your jewels!

1768
01:38:32,400 --> 01:38:35,300
Cousin Hubert!
what is this nightmare?

1769
01:38:38,700 --> 01:38:40,600
what the hell is going on?

1770
01:38:42,800 --> 01:38:44,400
I'm hallucinating!

1771
01:38:45,200 --> 01:38:47,600
what the hell is going on?

1772
01:41:57,200 --> 01:41:59,900
subtitled by Andrew Litvak

1773
01:42:03,600 --> 01:42:04,900
A little hello to credit-loverS!