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00:00:46,207 --> 00:00:51,207
♪ It's beginning to look
a lot like Christmas ♪
2
00:00:51,624 --> 00:00:56,499
♪ Everywhere you go ♪
3
00:00:56,666 --> 00:00:59,124
♪ Take a look in the five and ten ♪
4
00:00:59,291 --> 00:01:01,457
♪ Glistenin' once again ♪
5
00:01:01,624 --> 00:01:05,957
♪ With candy canes and
silver lanes aglow ♪
6
00:01:06,124 --> 00:01:11,124
♪ It's beginnin' to look
a lot like Christmas ♪
7
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♪ Toys in every store ♪
8
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♪ Ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ♪
9
00:01:16,541 --> 00:01:19,082
♪ But the prettiest sight to see ♪
10
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♪ Is the holly that will be ♪
11
00:01:21,499 --> 00:01:26,207
♪ On your own front door ♪
12
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♪ A pair of Hopalong boots and
a pistol that shoots ♪
13
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♪ Is the wish of Barney and Ben ♪
14
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♪ Dolls that will talk and
will go for a walk ♪
15
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♪ Is the hope of Janice and Jen ♪
16
00:01:36,999 --> 00:01:41,166
♪ And Mom and Dad can hardly wait for
school to start again ♪
17
00:01:41,332 --> 00:01:46,707
♪ It's beginning to look
a lot like Christmas ♪
18
00:01:47,416 --> 00:01:51,499
♪ Everywhere you go ♪
19
00:01:51,666 --> 00:01:54,416
♪ There's a tree in the Grand Hotel ♪
20
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♪ One in the park as well ♪
21
00:01:56,874 --> 00:02:01,541
♪ The sturdy kind that
doesn't mind the snow ♪
22
00:02:01,707 --> 00:02:06,707
♪ It's beginning to look
a lot like Christmas ♪
23
00:02:07,207 --> 00:02:10,541
♪ Soon the bells will start ♪
24
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♪ Ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ♪
25
00:02:12,291 --> 00:02:14,749
♪ And the thing that'll make them ring ♪
26
00:02:14,916 --> 00:02:17,249
♪ Is the carol that you sing ♪
27
00:02:17,416 --> 00:02:22,124
♪ Right within your heart ♪
28
00:02:42,582 --> 00:02:47,999
♪ It's beginning to look
a lot like Christmas ♪
29
00:02:48,416 --> 00:02:53,166
♪ Toys in every store ♪
30
00:02:53,332 --> 00:02:56,999
♪ But the prettiest sight to see ♪
31
00:02:57,166 --> 00:03:00,999
♪ Is the holly that will be ♪
32
00:03:01,332 --> 00:03:08,332
♪ On your own front door ♪
33
00:03:09,499 --> 00:03:16,499
♪ Sure, it's Christmas once more ♪
34
00:03:21,582 --> 00:03:26,541
I come tonight to warn you that
you will be visited by three spirits.
35
00:03:27,041 --> 00:03:28,041
What?
36
00:03:29,332 --> 00:03:32,624
Was that the chance of hope
that you mentioned, Jacob?
37
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It was.
38
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And you have yet the chance
and hope of escaping my fate!
39
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A chance and hope of my procuring,
Ebenezer.
40
00:03:42,832 --> 00:03:44,624
Thank you, Jacob.
41
00:03:44,791 --> 00:03:49,666
Expect the first when the bell tolls one.
42
00:03:49,916 --> 00:03:50,957
Shut up, Beth!
43
00:03:51,124 --> 00:03:52,874
I don't care who started it, Max!
44
00:03:54,166 --> 00:03:56,416
Ben Kuklinski started it and
everybody knows it.
45
00:03:56,582 --> 00:03:57,957
You even have the whole thing on video!
46
00:03:58,124 --> 00:04:00,082
And you're gonna write
an apology to the rest of your class
47
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-for ruining the recital.
-What were you thinking, Max?
48
00:04:02,457 --> 00:04:04,041
That kid was twice your size!
49
00:04:04,207 --> 00:04:06,832
Yeah, but Ben Kuklinski is always
ragging on Christmas.
50
00:04:07,041 --> 00:04:08,499
He even told the first graders that Santa
51
00:04:08,666 --> 00:04:10,999
was just a cheap marketing ploy
invented to sell Pepsi.
52
00:04:11,166 --> 00:04:12,832
-Coke.
-You know what I mean.
53
00:04:12,999 --> 00:04:14,332
But not why you care.
54
00:04:14,499 --> 00:04:15,582
Well, someone's gotta.
55
00:04:15,749 --> 00:04:16,999
Here, let me see.
56
00:04:17,832 --> 00:04:18,874
Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow!
57
00:04:19,041 --> 00:04:21,041
Eh, it's not so bad.
Just keep icing it.
58
00:04:21,207 --> 00:04:23,624
And was drop-kicking him into the manger
59
00:04:23,791 --> 00:04:25,416
really the best way to handle this?
60
00:04:25,582 --> 00:04:27,916
Okay, that was not my fault,
I was under the influence.
61
00:04:28,707 --> 00:04:30,916
Alls I had to eat was Christmas
fudge and candy canes!
62
00:04:31,332 --> 00:04:32,416
Well, I hate to sound harsh,
63
00:04:32,582 --> 00:04:34,332
but every kid has to learn
the truth someday.
64
00:04:35,624 --> 00:04:37,207
Oh, 1 know, I just...
65
00:04:38,041 --> 00:04:39,207
I didn't want it ruined.
66
00:04:40,124 --> 00:04:41,374
For the little kids.
67
00:04:42,207 --> 00:04:44,207
But is this a war on Christmas,
68
00:04:44,374 --> 00:04:45,957
a war on over-political correctness, or--
69
00:04:46,124 --> 00:04:47,707
-Looks great, Mom.
-...a bunch of people who are just
70
00:04:47,874 --> 00:04:49,166
-way too easily offended?
71
00:04:49,332 --> 00:04:50,332
Don't work too hard, though,
72
00:04:50,499 --> 00:04:52,666
Sarah bought a bunch of
cookies at the store.
73
00:04:52,832 --> 00:04:54,374
-It's Roger.
74
00:04:54,541 --> 00:04:56,249
Thought you said you weren't
working over Christmas?
75
00:04:56,416 --> 00:04:57,624
I said no traveling over Christmas,
76
00:04:57,791 --> 00:04:59,249
I still have to take a few calls.
77
00:04:59,707 --> 00:05:00,707
Hey, Roger, what's up?
78
00:05:00,874 --> 00:05:02,916
Wait, guys, aren't we still gonna
watch Charlie Brown
79
00:05:03,082 --> 00:05:05,124
and wrap Christmas presents like always?
80
00:05:05,291 --> 00:05:08,332
You know what, after what you pulled,
you can do that alone, and quick!
81
00:05:08,499 --> 00:05:09,791
Your cousins get here any minute.
82
00:05:09,957 --> 00:05:10,999
Yeah, Roger.
83
00:05:11,166 --> 00:05:13,166
Oh, it's a Christmas cluster F over here.
84
00:05:13,332 --> 00:05:14,874
Beth, help me hang this.
85
00:05:17,916 --> 00:05:19,624
Wait, Mom, aren't we gonna
watch Charlie Brown?
86
00:05:33,499 --> 00:05:34,707
I started, but...
87
00:05:35,166 --> 00:05:36,541
I don't know what to ask for this year.
88
00:05:36,707 --> 00:05:38,249
...come here?
Because they are
89
00:05:38,416 --> 00:05:39,582
-our family, Beth!
90
00:05:39,749 --> 00:05:42,041
-And it's only for a few days.
Well, I'm not sharing my room
91
00:05:42,207 --> 00:05:43,457
with girls who pee standing up!
92
00:05:47,624 --> 00:05:49,624
Last year I found shit in my bed, Mom.
93
00:05:49,791 --> 00:05:50,916
-Human shit!
94
00:05:51,082 --> 00:05:52,791
For the last time, that was their dog!
95
00:05:52,957 --> 00:05:54,916
"They're why some people
shouldn't be allowed to breed!"
96
00:05:55,082 --> 00:05:57,041
Your words, Mom, not mine!
97
00:05:57,541 --> 00:05:59,124
I never said that!
98
00:06:00,916 --> 00:06:02,457
I said maybe they should
have to take a test
99
00:06:02,624 --> 00:06:03,707
before they're allowed to breed.
100
00:06:28,124 --> 00:06:29,291
Thanks, Omi.
101
00:06:32,166 --> 00:06:33,249
Omi?
102
00:06:33,416 --> 00:06:34,457
Hm?
103
00:06:34,957 --> 00:06:36,957
Do you still really believe in Santa?
104
00:06:47,499 --> 00:06:48,541
What do you mean?
105
00:06:59,457 --> 00:07:04,291
♪ Oh come let us adore him ♪
106
00:07:21,291 --> 00:07:23,332
Yeah, my cousins are crawling
outta the shallow end
107
00:07:23,499 --> 00:07:25,957
of the gene pool, so
everyone's a little on edge.
108
00:07:26,124 --> 00:07:27,666
Your mom popping Xanax again?
109
00:07:27,832 --> 00:07:29,707
Like candy.
110
00:07:29,874 --> 00:07:33,874
Tonight we're making a Japanese
snowflake tree or some crap.
111
00:07:34,541 --> 00:07:36,082
Takes a lotta work
to make our family
112
00:07:36,249 --> 00:07:37,874
look more awesome than it actually is,
you know?
113
00:07:38,041 --> 00:07:41,791
I like snowflakes,
but I like my plan a lot better.
114
00:07:41,957 --> 00:07:44,707
Very enticing,
115
00:07:45,707 --> 00:07:47,124
but I think I'm stuck here.
116
00:07:47,291 --> 00:07:49,957
Come on, people have escaped
from Alcatraz before,
117
00:07:50,124 --> 00:07:51,124
and I'm only four blocks away!
118
00:07:53,749 --> 00:07:54,916
What?
119
00:07:55,082 --> 00:07:56,082
-What's wrong?
120
00:07:56,249 --> 00:07:57,874
Everything.
121
00:08:06,832 --> 00:08:07,999
-Oh, crap.
122
00:08:08,624 --> 00:08:10,624
- Oh, crap.
123
00:08:14,332 --> 00:08:15,416
Will you two knock it off?
124
00:08:15,582 --> 00:08:16,916
Howie, stop ringing the doorbell!
125
00:08:17,082 --> 00:08:18,749
Well, carry something!
Howie, cut it out!
126
00:08:18,916 --> 00:08:21,041
Okay, it's Christmas.
127
00:08:21,207 --> 00:08:22,874
-It's Christmas.
128
00:08:23,041 --> 00:08:24,666
-It's Christmas.
129
00:08:24,832 --> 00:08:27,707
-Merry Christmas!
-Hey, sis, merry Christmas.
130
00:08:27,874 --> 00:08:29,957
Oh, gosh, I'm so glad you
guys could make it!
131
00:08:30,124 --> 00:08:31,749
Oh, you have no idea!
132
00:08:31,916 --> 00:08:33,082
Accidents all over the freeways
133
00:08:33,249 --> 00:08:35,416
and nothing but crazy talk
radio for six hours.
134
00:08:35,582 --> 00:08:36,957
-Hey!
-We brought you a little taste of home,
135
00:08:37,124 --> 00:08:39,041
-though, didn't we?
Oh, wow!
136
00:08:39,707 --> 00:08:42,124
Thank you, it looks...
Wow!
137
00:08:42,291 --> 00:08:43,957
-You're welcome.
-Come on, Linda, move it, move it!
138
00:08:44,124 --> 00:08:45,624
We don't have to keep
the traffic jam going now.
139
00:08:45,791 --> 00:08:47,291
-Howard, let me help you--
-Oh no, get--
140
00:08:49,707 --> 00:08:51,207
It's all right, Tom.
Thanks, Tommy.
141
00:08:51,374 --> 00:08:53,124
Sorry about that.
-You give the butler the night off,
142
00:08:53,291 --> 00:08:54,874
-did you?
Ha ha, yeah.
143
00:08:55,207 --> 00:08:57,249
Yeah, we, uh, brought Rosie.
144
00:08:57,457 --> 00:08:58,707
You don't have a cat, do you?
145
00:08:58,999 --> 00:09:01,249
It's fine, it's fine, right?
It's fine.
146
00:09:01,416 --> 00:09:03,124
Merry Christmas, girls!
Come on in!
147
00:09:03,416 --> 00:09:05,791
Don't you look cute in
your matching jackets?
148
00:09:06,249 --> 00:09:09,124
They're just a little cranky
'cause the Steelers lost, so...
149
00:09:09,291 --> 00:09:11,291
Uh, Jordan, Stevie, why don't you
tell your Aunt Sarah
150
00:09:11,457 --> 00:09:13,332
about your Presidential
Fitness Award, huh?
151
00:09:15,624 --> 00:09:17,624
-It's a good story.
Yeah.
152
00:09:17,791 --> 00:09:19,416
Yeah.
-Hey, Howie.
153
00:09:21,082 --> 00:09:23,332
So what'd you ask Santa for this year?
154
00:09:23,499 --> 00:09:25,957
They're really nice.
They did look pretty good.
155
00:09:26,124 --> 00:09:28,374
It looks bigger in here.
-Um, toy car?
156
00:09:29,249 --> 00:09:32,457
Look what Max has got
in his pocket. A letter to Santa.
157
00:09:33,874 --> 00:09:36,291
Video games?
158
00:09:37,374 --> 00:09:38,374
Phone?
159
00:09:39,916 --> 00:09:40,916
Dialysis?
160
00:09:43,957 --> 00:09:46,041
That long drive.
Thank you. Thank you, guys.
161
00:09:46,832 --> 00:09:48,541
Where do you want this stuff,
Tom, just anywhere?
162
00:09:48,707 --> 00:09:49,749
Yeah, uh--
163
00:09:49,916 --> 00:09:52,791
Christ on a stick, would it kill you
to shovel your walk?
164
00:09:52,957 --> 00:09:54,957
I could've broken a hip out there!
165
00:09:55,124 --> 00:09:56,791
Surprise!
166
00:09:56,957 --> 00:09:58,166
Please don't be mad.
167
00:09:59,332 --> 00:10:03,249
Oh, Aunt Dorothy,
it's so great to see you.
168
00:10:03,416 --> 00:10:06,416
Yeah, well, your sister's
no Mother Teresa,
169
00:10:06,832 --> 00:10:09,457
but at least she swings by
every once in a while
170
00:10:09,624 --> 00:10:11,124
to make sure that I'm not dead.
171
00:10:12,124 --> 00:10:13,416
So where's the nog?
172
00:10:14,124 --> 00:10:15,499
I need to get merry!
173
00:10:15,666 --> 00:10:18,166
Uh, it--it's in the kitchen.
Help yourself.
174
00:10:18,332 --> 00:10:21,499
Oh, Tom, let me take that.
Oh, hey! That's okay, that's okay.
175
00:10:21,666 --> 00:10:23,249
Lord Almighty.
176
00:10:23,582 --> 00:10:25,624
Looks like Martha Stewart
threw up in here.
177
00:10:25,791 --> 00:10:28,082
We left the door open--
Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
178
00:10:28,249 --> 00:10:30,332
We're such a mess, honestly.
Gosh!
179
00:10:30,499 --> 00:10:32,707
-Six hours, I mean, come on!
-Uh...
180
00:10:33,082 --> 00:10:35,291
Sorry, wasn't there another...?
181
00:10:35,999 --> 00:10:36,999
Hm?
182
00:10:37,791 --> 00:10:38,791
Child?
183
00:10:39,166 --> 00:10:40,624
Chrissy! Darn it!
184
00:10:40,916 --> 00:10:42,749
Jordan, I told you to bring her inside!
185
00:10:42,916 --> 00:10:44,582
-Not my kid.
Come on, girls!
186
00:10:44,749 --> 00:10:46,124
-Tommy, help me get the baby--
-Yeah.
187
00:10:46,291 --> 00:10:47,957
...and the rest of the girl crap
out of the truck.
188
00:10:48,124 --> 00:10:49,124
Do you mind? Thank you.
189
00:10:49,291 --> 00:10:51,291
All right, let's make some memories, huh?
190
00:10:52,416 --> 00:10:55,374
Thank you, honey! Thank you!
Oh, my goodness.
191
00:10:55,541 --> 00:10:57,582
A holiday roast is a surprise.
192
00:10:57,749 --> 00:10:59,124
Hemorrhoids are a surprise.
193
00:10:59,291 --> 00:11:01,957
She is a goddamn nightmare!
What were you thinking?
194
00:11:02,124 --> 00:11:03,541
Come on, she's not that bad!
195
00:11:03,707 --> 00:11:05,499
-Oh!
-She's not!
196
00:11:05,666 --> 00:11:07,582
Besides, she tricked me, okay?
197
00:11:07,749 --> 00:11:10,541
I thought we were just dropping off gifts
and she came to the door with a suitcase.
198
00:11:10,707 --> 00:11:13,082
What was I supposed to do, tell her
she has to spend Christmas by herself?
199
00:11:13,249 --> 00:11:15,082
No, but at least you could've warned me
200
00:11:15,249 --> 00:11:17,957
when one of your mistakes is
gonna become my problem.
201
00:11:18,124 --> 00:11:19,791
You think everything I do is a mistake.
202
00:11:20,416 --> 00:11:21,832
Sorry, look out!
203
00:11:21,999 --> 00:11:23,416
Look out!
204
00:11:23,582 --> 00:11:24,666
-Hey, honey.
-Ooh, oh!
205
00:11:24,832 --> 00:11:26,374
I think this warhead's armed.
206
00:11:26,541 --> 00:11:28,166
Wow, you're so stinky!
207
00:11:28,332 --> 00:11:29,999
Okay, I'm gonna go change her.
208
00:11:30,166 --> 00:11:31,207
Let's go this way.
209
00:11:31,374 --> 00:11:32,999
Just set that up wherever you want, T.
210
00:11:33,166 --> 00:11:36,416
The whole truck
smells like shit.
211
00:11:37,957 --> 00:11:39,791
So what's for dinner?
212
00:11:54,124 --> 00:11:55,582
That's my boy!
213
00:11:56,041 --> 00:11:57,291
That's my boy!
214
00:11:57,707 --> 00:11:58,916
It sure is.
215
00:11:59,582 --> 00:12:01,374
I'm gettin' Howie Jr. into game shape.
216
00:12:01,541 --> 00:12:02,832
By the time he gets to high school,
217
00:12:02,999 --> 00:12:05,416
he's gonna be the biggest
lineman in the state.
218
00:12:06,457 --> 00:12:09,457
Did you ever spend any time on the field,
Tommy?
219
00:12:09,624 --> 00:12:11,916
No, actually, I didn't have time
in my younger years,
220
00:12:12,082 --> 00:12:13,374
I was in training mostly.
221
00:12:13,541 --> 00:12:14,541
What were you training for?
222
00:12:14,707 --> 00:12:16,166
Uh. Army?
223
00:12:16,582 --> 00:12:17,582
Marines?
224
00:12:18,916 --> 00:12:20,416
It was the Eagle Scouts.
225
00:12:20,582 --> 00:12:21,791
Eagle Scouts.
226
00:12:22,457 --> 00:12:25,666
Now Eagle Scouts, kids,
that's where you weave baskets
227
00:12:25,832 --> 00:12:28,082
and help little old ladies
across the street.
228
00:12:28,249 --> 00:12:30,457
-Am I right?
-No, no.
229
00:12:30,624 --> 00:12:33,707
No, no, no, no, it was actually quite
a bit of survival training.
230
00:12:35,166 --> 00:12:37,457
-So--
-Well, the only survival training I need
231
00:12:37,624 --> 00:12:41,124
is my ol' smoke pole and that big,
fat box of buckshot
232
00:12:41,291 --> 00:12:42,791
that I keep out in that truck.
233
00:12:43,166 --> 00:12:45,707
A shepherd has gotta protect his flock.
234
00:12:46,291 --> 00:12:49,249
Honey, we said no gun talk
at the dinner table.
235
00:12:49,666 --> 00:12:51,457
This family needs a little gun talk,
236
00:12:51,624 --> 00:12:53,791
whether it's at the dinner
table or anywhere else.
237
00:12:53,957 --> 00:12:55,041
Wow!
Know what I'm saying?
238
00:12:55,207 --> 00:12:57,249
Looks like Chrissy's really
enjoying my gravlax.
239
00:12:59,416 --> 00:13:01,124
Careful, kids,
remember that your Aunt Sarah
240
00:13:01,291 --> 00:13:02,707
likes everything to be clean and perfect,
241
00:13:02,874 --> 00:13:04,249
and that's why she makes so much food
242
00:13:04,416 --> 00:13:06,041
that you can't pronounce!
243
00:13:06,207 --> 00:13:07,749
Well, I just thought you guys
might like a break
244
00:13:07,916 --> 00:13:09,832
from macaroni and cheese with hot dogs.
245
00:13:10,041 --> 00:13:12,624
-Yeah, okay.
-Well, you were wrong.
246
00:13:13,041 --> 00:13:15,124
And who doesn't make a ham at Christmas?
247
00:13:15,541 --> 00:13:17,249
What are you now, a Jew?
248
00:13:21,541 --> 00:13:23,124
Maybe it's time for dessert, hmm?
249
00:13:24,291 --> 00:13:26,416
-It's delicious, honey.
-It's a little dry.
250
00:13:26,582 --> 00:13:28,957
Okay, well, mine's delicious!
251
00:13:31,499 --> 00:13:33,082
Well, I guess I should've
gotten your bird.
252
00:13:33,249 --> 00:13:34,624
You can just say something nice.
253
00:13:35,041 --> 00:13:36,916
I'll say it when she gets back,
if dessert's good.
254
00:13:37,082 --> 00:13:38,749
Well, if you could just do me a favor.
255
00:13:38,916 --> 00:13:40,666
Tell him about Santa.
Just say something nice
256
00:13:40,832 --> 00:13:43,249
-about dessert.
-Hey, Maxi-Pad.
257
00:13:43,957 --> 00:13:45,166
You hear what happened to Santa?
258
00:13:45,332 --> 00:13:47,832
No, Stevie,
what happened to Santa?
259
00:13:47,999 --> 00:13:49,291
Heard it on the news.
260
00:13:49,541 --> 00:13:51,582
His sleigh crashed in the Rockies.
261
00:13:51,749 --> 00:13:53,499
Shattered both his legs.
262
00:13:54,207 --> 00:13:56,749
Frostbite took care of his pain,
but not his hunger.
263
00:13:57,124 --> 00:14:01,082
So, to survive, he had to slaughter
and eat his reindeer.
264
00:14:03,166 --> 00:14:04,332
Including Rudolph.
265
00:14:05,541 --> 00:14:07,874
Ate tiny reindeer, get it?
266
00:14:09,082 --> 00:14:10,916
-Knock it off!
267
00:14:11,624 --> 00:14:13,082
Don't start anything.
268
00:14:13,499 --> 00:14:14,624
Hey, guys, take it easy.
269
00:14:15,249 --> 00:14:16,999
They're just playin', Tommy.
270
00:14:22,166 --> 00:14:24,666
Macaroni and cheese and hot dogs.
271
00:14:24,832 --> 00:14:25,832
Oh, Jesus!
272
00:14:27,207 --> 00:14:29,249
So what kind of godforsaken concoction
273
00:14:29,416 --> 00:14:30,957
are you whippin' up now?
274
00:14:31,124 --> 00:14:33,916
You know how this fancy
food clogs my pipes.
275
00:14:34,499 --> 00:14:35,999
Well, how about we go to your trailer
276
00:14:36,166 --> 00:14:37,416
for Christmas next year, hmm?
277
00:14:38,207 --> 00:14:39,416
And after you've spent weeks
278
00:14:39,582 --> 00:14:41,582
decorating and cooking and cleaning,
279
00:14:41,749 --> 00:14:43,374
I might just waddle in and start
bitching and moaning
280
00:14:43,541 --> 00:14:44,874
about everything you've worked so hard on!
281
00:14:45,082 --> 00:14:46,207
Oh, Sarah, you know--
282
00:14:46,374 --> 00:14:47,749
No, Aunt Dorothy, please!
283
00:14:48,166 --> 00:14:49,541
For your sake, just...
284
00:14:51,416 --> 00:14:52,832
stay the fuck outta my kitchen!
285
00:14:56,041 --> 00:14:58,791
You know, reindeer are actually
a sustainable food source
286
00:14:59,207 --> 00:15:02,041
in the Northern Territories
and Alaska, Canada.
287
00:15:02,207 --> 00:15:04,957
This time of year we refer to reindeer
288
00:15:05,124 --> 00:15:08,874
as a transportation system
for Santa Claus.
289
00:15:09,207 --> 00:15:10,916
Most people--
-We know you still believe
290
00:15:11,082 --> 00:15:12,999
in the big, fat creeper.
291
00:15:13,499 --> 00:15:15,082
I don't know what you're talking about.
292
00:15:16,124 --> 00:15:17,124
You sure about that?
293
00:15:19,332 --> 00:15:21,749
-Max, stop!
Flying through the sky--
294
00:15:22,207 --> 00:15:23,374
"Dear Santa,
295
00:15:24,457 --> 00:15:25,957
I know I haven't been great this year,
296
00:15:26,124 --> 00:15:28,916
and I'm sorry for that,
but I was really hoping
297
00:15:29,082 --> 00:15:31,457
you could help out me and
my family this Christmas.
298
00:15:31,999 --> 00:15:33,207
We need you."
299
00:15:33,374 --> 00:15:35,082
-Oh, Maxi-Pad, that's so sweet.
300
00:15:35,249 --> 00:15:37,082
-Give it back!
-Stop, Max!
301
00:15:37,666 --> 00:15:39,749
Blah, blah, blah, bullshit, bullshit.
302
00:15:39,916 --> 00:15:41,832
Ah, here we go, Maxi's wish list.
303
00:15:41,999 --> 00:15:44,499
-Stevie, stop, that's enough!
-Wait, you're up first, Beth.
304
00:15:45,041 --> 00:15:48,041
"I wish me and Beth could
hang out like we used to.
305
00:15:48,749 --> 00:15:51,624
You might have noticed that
I don't have tons of friends."
306
00:15:51,791 --> 00:15:54,291
-Oh, no, really, Max?
307
00:15:54,457 --> 00:15:57,499
"l wish my mom and dad could
fall in love again.
308
00:15:58,874 --> 00:16:00,124
I know they get upset a lot,
309
00:16:00,291 --> 00:16:02,082
with Dad away from home so much.
310
00:16:02,457 --> 00:16:04,416
I think they really just miss each other."
311
00:16:06,791 --> 00:16:09,416
"Also, I wish things weren't so hard
312
00:16:09,582 --> 00:16:12,457
for Uncle Howard and Aunt Linda."
313
00:16:15,541 --> 00:16:18,499
"So maybe you can lend them a hand
the rest of the year too.
314
00:16:21,957 --> 00:16:22,957
And...
315
00:16:24,041 --> 00:16:25,041
And that..."
316
00:16:25,207 --> 00:16:27,832
Screw you, Dad does not wish we were boys!
317
00:16:27,999 --> 00:16:31,416
-Okay, who wants créme brûlée?
318
00:16:34,957 --> 00:16:36,166
-Give me the letter!
319
00:16:36,332 --> 00:16:37,874
-Give me it back!
-Hey, Max!
320
00:16:38,041 --> 00:16:39,957
-Hey, hey, hey!
321
00:16:40,124 --> 00:16:41,124
-Hey!
322
00:16:41,332 --> 00:16:42,624
Girls!
323
00:16:42,791 --> 00:16:45,166
Hey!
324
00:16:45,332 --> 00:16:46,582
Hey!
Hey!
325
00:16:46,749 --> 00:16:48,249
Up up!
Come on, Howard.
326
00:16:48,416 --> 00:16:49,666
-Stevie, Jordan!
-Come on!
327
00:16:49,832 --> 00:16:51,582
All right, all right, that's enough!
328
00:16:51,749 --> 00:16:53,582
-Now are you okay, honey?
That's enough.
329
00:16:55,541 --> 00:16:57,832
I just wanted Christmas to be
like it used to be, but forget it!
330
00:16:57,999 --> 00:16:59,124
I hate Christmas!
331
00:16:59,374 --> 00:17:01,124
-I hate all of you!
-Max.
332
00:17:02,624 --> 00:17:03,749
Max!
333
00:17:03,916 --> 00:17:05,457
Oh, lay off of him.
334
00:17:05,666 --> 00:17:08,041
Kid deserves a prize
just for tellin' the truth.
335
00:17:18,166 --> 00:17:21,166
-Can I come in?
-No.
336
00:17:22,499 --> 00:17:24,957
You know, they're leaving
right after Christmas,
337
00:17:25,124 --> 00:17:28,832
so we only have to survive
another three days.
338
00:17:29,291 --> 00:17:30,374
I don't get it.
339
00:17:30,582 --> 00:17:31,957
Every year it gets worse!
340
00:17:32,124 --> 00:17:34,874
Why do we have to put up with their crap
just 'cause we share DNA?
341
00:17:37,624 --> 00:17:40,499
Because that's what a family is, Max.
342
00:17:41,291 --> 00:17:43,082
People you try to be friends with
343
00:17:43,249 --> 00:17:45,707
even though you don't have
a whole lot in common.
344
00:17:46,541 --> 00:17:48,374
-But why?
-Because...
345
00:17:48,957 --> 00:17:49,957
Well...
346
00:17:51,874 --> 00:17:53,416
Okay, you kinda got me there.
347
00:17:55,916 --> 00:17:58,291
Or maybe it makes us work a little harder
348
00:17:58,457 --> 00:18:00,874
to find what we do have in common,
you know?
349
00:18:01,291 --> 00:18:04,291
Put everything aside,
think of other people for a change.
350
00:18:04,874 --> 00:18:06,207
Friends, family,
351
00:18:07,499 --> 00:18:09,582
even the assholes you
normally can't stand.
352
00:18:09,749 --> 00:18:10,874
Like Uncle Howard?
353
00:18:11,041 --> 00:18:12,249
Didn't wanna name names.
354
00:18:15,041 --> 00:18:17,707
Dad, do you really believe in all that?
355
00:18:19,207 --> 00:18:20,624
I want to, Max.
356
00:18:23,874 --> 00:18:24,874
But, hey,
357
00:18:25,999 --> 00:18:28,624
bet there's still time to drop
that letter in the mailbox, huh?
358
00:20:26,291 --> 00:20:27,791
Don't you find it the least bit strange?
359
00:20:27,957 --> 00:20:29,541
I mean, they can see dust specks on Mars,
360
00:20:29,707 --> 00:20:32,374
but no one noticed a giant blizzard
hurtling towards us!
361
00:20:32,541 --> 00:20:34,332
Well, as soon as the power's back,
362
00:20:34,499 --> 00:20:35,874
you can write an angry e-mail
363
00:20:36,041 --> 00:20:38,332
to the National Weather Service,
but, in the meantime,
364
00:20:38,499 --> 00:20:39,707
let's just try and stay calm.
365
00:20:39,874 --> 00:20:41,416
Mom, there's something weird outside.
366
00:20:41,582 --> 00:20:43,041
I am calm, I would just be calmer
367
00:20:43,207 --> 00:20:44,749
if I knew how we were gonna
survive Christmas
368
00:20:44,916 --> 00:20:46,082
with 12 people stuck in a house
369
00:20:46,249 --> 00:20:48,916
with no hot water, no heat,
and no electricity!
370
00:20:49,666 --> 00:20:50,666
Or food.
371
00:20:50,832 --> 00:20:53,541
Well, there's plenty of leftovers, Howard.
372
00:20:54,291 --> 00:20:55,457
Beer it is!
373
00:20:56,041 --> 00:20:57,041
Phone's dead too.
374
00:20:57,707 --> 00:20:58,832
-Mom!
-What, Max?
375
00:20:58,999 --> 00:21:00,416
There's a snowman in our yard.
376
00:21:02,832 --> 00:21:03,832
See?
377
00:21:06,374 --> 00:21:07,707
That's...
378
00:21:07,874 --> 00:21:09,082
That's great, Max.
379
00:21:09,249 --> 00:21:11,624
-But who built it?
-You can barely see across the street,
380
00:21:11,791 --> 00:21:13,666
but it doesn't look like it's just us.
381
00:21:15,082 --> 00:21:16,666
I can walk over, check with the Turners.
382
00:21:16,832 --> 00:21:18,374
The Turners are in Hawaii.
383
00:21:18,541 --> 00:21:19,791
The Lamberts are in Florida
384
00:21:19,957 --> 00:21:21,041
and the Cartwrights stopped talking to us
385
00:21:21,207 --> 00:21:23,541
after Max's noodle incident.
386
00:21:23,707 --> 00:21:24,791
After his what?
387
00:21:24,957 --> 00:21:26,624
Max, please go and get Omi
out of the fireplace
388
00:21:26,791 --> 00:21:28,666
before she burns the whole house down.
389
00:21:31,416 --> 00:21:32,624
I'll get it!
390
00:21:33,082 --> 00:21:34,082
Fine!
391
00:21:34,916 --> 00:21:36,249
Seriously, what are we gonna do?
392
00:21:37,624 --> 00:21:38,749
Merry Christmas.
-Whoa!
393
00:21:38,916 --> 00:21:40,499
-Sign here.
-Yeah!
394
00:21:41,791 --> 00:21:42,832
Wow!
395
00:21:42,999 --> 00:21:44,707
Honey, stuff to carry!
396
00:21:45,499 --> 00:21:46,499
Some weather, huh?
397
00:21:46,666 --> 00:21:48,541
Yeah, it's a ghost town out there.
398
00:21:48,707 --> 00:21:49,832
Roads are a nightmare.
399
00:21:50,041 --> 00:21:51,041
Yeah, no kidding.
400
00:21:51,499 --> 00:21:52,832
Hey, these, too?
401
00:21:53,249 --> 00:21:54,291
Uh, not mine.
402
00:21:54,707 --> 00:21:56,041
Uh, must be from the boys in brown.
403
00:21:56,207 --> 00:21:57,332
-All right.
-Merry Christmas.
404
00:21:57,499 --> 00:21:58,666
Yeah, you, too.
405
00:21:59,332 --> 00:22:01,916
-Ah, what is it?
-Hey, look at this, huh?
406
00:22:02,082 --> 00:22:03,291
What?
407
00:22:03,457 --> 00:22:04,541
They got more stuff.
408
00:22:04,707 --> 00:22:06,707
Man, how come rich people
get all the free shit?
409
00:22:06,916 --> 00:22:08,166
I don't know, honey.
410
00:22:08,332 --> 00:22:09,916
Democrats, probably.
411
00:22:12,332 --> 00:22:13,916
Oh, my God!
412
00:22:14,082 --> 00:22:16,416
-Who needs this much cheese?
413
00:22:16,749 --> 00:22:18,291
It's one singular moment.
414
00:22:18,457 --> 00:22:20,332
-You're saying I do it all--
-You guys, I've texted Derek
415
00:22:20,499 --> 00:22:22,666
like nine times and
he still hasn't written back.
416
00:22:22,832 --> 00:22:23,916
That is not normal!
417
00:22:24,082 --> 00:22:26,416
It's the blizzard, honey,
nothing's working right now.
418
00:22:26,582 --> 00:22:28,166
Then can I walk over and check on him?
419
00:22:28,707 --> 00:22:29,749
It's only a few blocks.
420
00:22:29,916 --> 00:22:31,957
I don't think that's a good idea.
421
00:22:32,749 --> 00:22:34,624
Well, I could see if anyone else
has power on the way.
422
00:22:34,791 --> 00:22:37,749
You know, you kids don't have
a damn bit of patience.
423
00:22:37,916 --> 00:22:40,249
When I was your age,
I didn't hear from my boyfriend
424
00:22:40,416 --> 00:22:43,666
for two years while
he was off fightin' Charlie.
425
00:22:46,957 --> 00:22:48,374
She'll be fine.
426
00:22:49,374 --> 00:22:51,082
Okay. One hour.
427
00:22:51,249 --> 00:22:52,749
But when you get back, I want you to spend
428
00:22:52,916 --> 00:22:54,416
some girl time with Jordan and Stevie,
429
00:22:54,582 --> 00:22:55,832
-got it?
Ow, ow, ow!
430
00:22:55,999 --> 00:22:57,916
-You call that a reversal?
431
00:22:58,082 --> 00:23:00,916
Come on, Jordy, plant your feet!
Plant your feet!
432
00:23:01,082 --> 00:23:02,291
-All right, here we go.
-Right.
433
00:23:02,624 --> 00:23:03,957
Again, again!
-You know what I mean.
434
00:23:04,124 --> 00:23:05,332
Thanks.
Get off me!
435
00:23:05,499 --> 00:23:06,874
Be careful, okay?
436
00:23:07,041 --> 00:23:08,041
Okay, back later!
437
00:23:08,207 --> 00:23:09,332
-Love you.
438
00:23:09,499 --> 00:23:10,749
-One hour!
439
00:23:10,916 --> 00:23:12,082
Okay!
440
00:23:14,791 --> 00:23:17,291
Max, I told you to get Omi out of...
441
00:23:29,416 --> 00:23:31,291
She says hot chocolate makes
everything better.
442
00:24:53,041 --> 00:24:54,041
Oh my God.
443
00:25:00,291 --> 00:25:02,374
-Please!
444
00:25:08,874 --> 00:25:10,541
Somebody help me!
445
00:25:10,791 --> 00:25:11,791
Please!
446
00:27:43,707 --> 00:27:44,707
Get anything?
447
00:27:45,791 --> 00:27:46,791
No.
448
00:27:48,874 --> 00:27:49,874
It's the weirdest thing.
449
00:27:50,041 --> 00:27:53,249
There's no cars, no people,
not even a salt truck.
450
00:27:55,291 --> 00:27:56,999
Don't suppose you got me
a backup generator
451
00:27:57,166 --> 00:27:58,166
for Christmas, did you?
452
00:27:58,332 --> 00:28:00,707
Yeah, it's under the tree,
453
00:28:00,874 --> 00:28:02,707
next to your ties and underwear.
454
00:28:02,874 --> 00:28:04,166
-Good.
455
00:28:09,582 --> 00:28:11,082
It's getting late.
456
00:28:12,166 --> 00:28:13,207
Beth should be home by now.
457
00:28:13,374 --> 00:28:14,832
She's fine, she's at Derek"s.
458
00:28:14,999 --> 00:28:16,957
All the more reason to worry.
459
00:28:17,124 --> 00:28:18,874
Hey, hon, relax.
460
00:28:19,041 --> 00:28:20,707
Just for once, okay?
461
00:28:24,416 --> 00:28:25,791
How's everybody else doing?
462
00:28:27,041 --> 00:28:29,916
You know,
cranky, bored,
463
00:28:30,749 --> 00:28:33,832
sick of the snow, and each other.
464
00:28:34,207 --> 00:28:35,957
-'Tis the season.
465
00:28:40,332 --> 00:28:42,082
Oh, God, I miss us.
466
00:28:44,499 --> 00:28:45,749
Me too.
467
00:28:54,957 --> 00:28:56,791
Mom? Dad?
468
00:28:58,291 --> 00:29:00,291
It's already dark out and
Beth isn't back yet.
469
00:29:06,249 --> 00:29:07,832
I'll tell you what.
470
00:29:07,999 --> 00:29:10,832
If I was a bum freezin'
on the street right now,
471
00:29:10,999 --> 00:29:13,332
I'd just-- end it.
472
00:29:13,874 --> 00:29:15,624
-Christ, Aunt Dorothy!
What?
473
00:29:16,124 --> 00:29:18,374
Even on a nice day
you wonder why they bother.
474
00:29:18,541 --> 00:29:19,541
Hey, Howard?
475
00:29:20,041 --> 00:29:21,707
Do you think your Hummer
could get through this mess?
476
00:29:21,874 --> 00:29:22,874
Lucinda?
477
00:29:23,499 --> 00:29:25,291
I could point her due east, hit the gas,
478
00:29:25,457 --> 00:29:28,374
and she'd be stormin' the beaches
at Normandy by sunrise.
479
00:29:28,541 --> 00:29:30,791
-What's on your mind, T?
-Well, it, it's Beth.
480
00:29:30,957 --> 00:29:32,207
She went to her boyfriend's earlier
481
00:29:32,374 --> 00:29:33,707
and she hasn't come back yet.
482
00:29:33,874 --> 00:29:36,416
See?
Let 'em out of your sight for one second
483
00:29:36,582 --> 00:29:38,791
and, boom, shotgun wedding!
484
00:29:38,957 --> 00:29:40,832
Aunt Dorothy, please.
485
00:29:41,541 --> 00:29:42,666
Well, you oughta know.
486
00:29:43,124 --> 00:29:44,457
Look, it's probably nothing,
487
00:29:44,624 --> 00:29:46,749
but I thought we'd go pick her up,
488
00:29:46,916 --> 00:29:47,957
take a quick swing around town,
489
00:29:48,124 --> 00:29:49,416
see what's goin' on out there.
490
00:29:49,582 --> 00:29:50,707
A little recon mission, huh?
491
00:29:51,291 --> 00:29:52,457
Thought you'd never ask!
492
00:29:52,624 --> 00:29:53,749
Okay.
493
00:29:53,916 --> 00:29:55,457
Go to Mama.
-Yep.
494
00:29:55,624 --> 00:29:57,416
All righty.
Thomas.
495
00:29:57,916 --> 00:29:58,957
Thomas.
496
00:30:01,582 --> 00:30:02,582
What? Why?
497
00:30:02,749 --> 00:30:04,707
What the hell is she so riled up about?
498
00:30:09,457 --> 00:30:10,749
She says not to go.
499
00:30:11,332 --> 00:30:13,457
That it's too dangerous and that
we should wait until the storm's over.
500
00:30:13,624 --> 00:30:14,874
Tom--
-No, I got this.
501
00:30:15,041 --> 00:30:17,457
Hey, Mom, we have to go pick up Beth,
502
00:30:17,624 --> 00:30:19,957
but Max and Sarah will take care
of you while I'm gone, okay?
503
00:30:20,124 --> 00:30:22,624
-Mom, hey, Mom, listen.
504
00:30:27,207 --> 00:30:28,332
Everything's gonna be okay.
505
00:30:51,249 --> 00:30:53,082
Global warming, my ass!
506
00:30:53,666 --> 00:30:55,291
Must be negative 20 out here.
507
00:30:57,624 --> 00:30:59,374
This just doesn't make any sense.
508
00:31:00,416 --> 00:31:01,541
You try AM?
509
00:31:01,707 --> 00:31:02,957
Yeah, I tried everything.
510
00:31:03,832 --> 00:31:06,666
The storm probably knocked out
the radio stations too.
511
00:31:07,124 --> 00:31:08,207
I guess so.
512
00:31:10,999 --> 00:31:12,207
-Oh!
...Weather Service...
513
00:31:12,374 --> 00:31:13,374
Here we go.
514
00:31:13,541 --> 00:31:16,582
...a blizzard warning
for the entire Central Ohio area,
515
00:31:16,749 --> 00:31:19,332
including Franklin County,
Delaware County,
516
00:31:19,499 --> 00:31:21,749
Ramona Falls, and Warren Valley.
517
00:31:21,916 --> 00:31:24,707
With temperatures reaching
minus 20 degrees,
518
00:31:24,874 --> 00:31:26,624
residents are urged to avoid travel
519
00:31:26,791 --> 00:31:28,041
and seek shelter immediately.
520
00:31:28,207 --> 00:31:29,457
Amen to that!
521
00:31:29,624 --> 00:31:30,999
This has been a recording.
522
00:31:34,916 --> 00:31:36,749
What I wouldn't give
for a little Bing Crosby
523
00:31:36,916 --> 00:31:38,249
right about now.
524
00:31:45,207 --> 00:31:47,457
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, slow down.
What is that?
525
00:31:58,874 --> 00:31:59,916
Is that a snowplow?
526
00:32:10,166 --> 00:32:11,207
Hello?
527
00:32:35,749 --> 00:32:36,749
Christ!
528
00:32:37,666 --> 00:32:40,041
Poor bastard must've sailed clear through.
529
00:32:40,999 --> 00:32:42,541
Looks more like the opposite.
530
00:32:43,541 --> 00:32:44,874
What do you mean?
531
00:32:45,041 --> 00:32:46,832
The glass is punched in.
532
00:33:01,416 --> 00:33:03,082
We gotta find Beth.
533
00:33:06,457 --> 00:33:09,457
You packed guns on Christmas.
534
00:33:10,124 --> 00:33:12,791
Always be prepared, Boy Scout!
535
00:33:13,832 --> 00:33:15,041
It's kinda heavy.
536
00:33:15,207 --> 00:33:16,249
Yeah.
537
00:33:17,124 --> 00:33:18,124
It's Linda's.
538
00:33:30,707 --> 00:33:31,874
Oh, my gosh!
539
00:33:33,416 --> 00:33:35,124
You had Mom's angel this whole time?
540
00:33:36,041 --> 00:33:37,166
Yeah, I thought you knew.
541
00:33:37,957 --> 00:33:38,957
No!
542
00:33:41,416 --> 00:33:42,624
Oh.
543
00:33:43,374 --> 00:33:45,582
Remember how we used to fight over
who got to place her?
544
00:33:45,749 --> 00:33:47,457
Yeah, and you fought dirty.
545
00:33:47,624 --> 00:33:49,499
-I think I still have the scars.
546
00:33:50,124 --> 00:33:51,957
Where do you think my girls get it from?
547
00:33:57,374 --> 00:33:58,457
Wow.
548
00:33:58,624 --> 00:33:59,791
You saved everything.
549
00:34:01,207 --> 00:34:02,207
Yeah.
550
00:34:03,082 --> 00:34:05,457
I figured that's what Mom would've done,
you know?
551
00:34:08,916 --> 00:34:10,457
You always do everything right.
552
00:34:11,624 --> 00:34:12,624
No!
553
00:34:13,332 --> 00:34:15,124
I'm just really good at making
it look like 1 do.
554
00:34:18,291 --> 00:34:21,082
Most days I wake up with one hand
on the panic button.
555
00:34:21,249 --> 00:34:22,582
Come on!
556
00:34:22,749 --> 00:34:24,166
I mean, you've got everything!
557
00:34:25,291 --> 00:34:28,666
I mean, your house looks
like one big SkyMall catalog.
558
00:34:28,832 --> 00:34:31,374
Yeah, but with Tom traveling and, uh,
559
00:34:31,541 --> 00:34:33,624
Max always holed up in his room
560
00:34:33,791 --> 00:34:35,749
doing whatever it is boys do,
561
00:34:36,332 --> 00:34:38,916
and Beth spending all her
time with Derek...
562
00:34:39,082 --> 00:34:42,457
I mean, things can get a little,
I don't know,
563
00:34:45,624 --> 00:34:46,624
quiet.
564
00:34:49,332 --> 00:34:51,416
I'm sorry, it's just...
565
00:34:52,791 --> 00:34:54,457
The grass is always greener, you know?
566
00:34:57,416 --> 00:34:59,541
I mean, I'm three years younger
567
00:35:00,374 --> 00:35:02,957
and I've managed to squeeze out
twice as many kids.
568
00:35:06,916 --> 00:35:09,207
Oh, yeah, do that math, right?
569
00:35:09,374 --> 00:35:10,457
Hm, I know.
570
00:35:12,166 --> 00:35:13,999
You guys always seem so...
571
00:35:14,707 --> 00:35:17,499
happy, like you could care less
what anyone else thinks.
572
00:35:20,916 --> 00:35:23,291
Are you jealous?
573
00:35:23,457 --> 00:35:25,374
-No, no!
-You're jealous!
574
00:35:25,541 --> 00:35:26,791
No, l only...
575
00:35:29,957 --> 00:35:31,707
It's just nice to have you around,
576
00:35:33,582 --> 00:35:34,582
that's all.
577
00:35:40,166 --> 00:35:42,707
Omi, try not to use up all the firewood,
okay?
578
00:35:42,874 --> 00:35:45,082
-We need to make it last.
579
00:35:53,957 --> 00:35:56,624
-Mom?
580
00:35:58,374 --> 00:35:59,749
Probably just squirrels.
581
00:36:00,457 --> 00:36:01,707
In this weather?
582
00:36:31,207 --> 00:36:32,207
See?
583
00:36:33,332 --> 00:36:34,457
-Squirrels.
Right.
584
00:36:35,374 --> 00:36:36,999
Probably playing with their nuts.
585
00:36:55,207 --> 00:36:58,791
Beth?
586
00:37:02,332 --> 00:37:04,291
-Derek?
587
00:37:08,541 --> 00:37:10,332
-Beth!
Quiet, Tommy!
588
00:37:10,499 --> 00:37:11,999
I don't like this.
589
00:37:34,624 --> 00:37:38,457
Whoever did this is
a demented son of a bitch.
590
00:37:47,499 --> 00:37:49,749
Don't worry, we'll find her, buddy.
591
00:38:00,957 --> 00:38:02,874
Looks like a gas line blew.
592
00:38:13,124 --> 00:38:14,124
What's that?
593
00:38:19,207 --> 00:38:21,374
I've hunted a lotta game in my day.
594
00:38:21,832 --> 00:38:24,416
Those are hooves, big ones too.
595
00:38:25,374 --> 00:38:27,624
Could be an elk or a goat.
596
00:38:27,791 --> 00:38:30,332
What kinda goat walks on its hind legs?
597
00:38:36,957 --> 00:38:37,999
Beth!
598
00:38:40,041 --> 00:38:41,791
-Beth!
Help me!
599
00:38:43,374 --> 00:38:44,916
Beth!
600
00:38:45,082 --> 00:38:46,291
Help!
601
00:38:48,874 --> 00:38:50,957
Beth!
Help!
602
00:38:52,499 --> 00:38:53,499
Beth!
603
00:38:54,207 --> 00:38:56,291
Help!
-Beth!
604
00:38:56,457 --> 00:38:57,457
Tommy!
605
00:38:58,291 --> 00:38:59,291
Wait up!
606
00:39:07,457 --> 00:39:10,624
Howard!
607
00:39:17,291 --> 00:39:18,582
-Oh my God!
608
00:39:18,749 --> 00:39:20,207
Hold on, Howard!
609
00:39:20,374 --> 00:39:21,957
Help!
-Oh my God!
610
00:39:22,124 --> 00:39:23,791
Tom, help me!
611
00:39:26,041 --> 00:39:27,582
Tommy!
612
00:39:27,749 --> 00:39:30,416
-Tom, something's biting me!
613
00:39:30,791 --> 00:39:32,041
-Don"t let go!
614
00:39:37,874 --> 00:39:38,916
Tom!
615
00:39:39,082 --> 00:39:40,374
-Tommy?
616
00:39:50,332 --> 00:39:52,416
-Let's go!
617
00:39:52,582 --> 00:39:54,082
What was that thing?
618
00:39:54,249 --> 00:39:55,791
I don't know, but we have to move!
619
00:40:04,249 --> 00:40:06,541
-Oh my God!
-Oh!
620
00:40:09,541 --> 00:40:12,541
Lucinda!
621
00:40:14,374 --> 00:40:15,666
Where do you think you're going?
622
00:40:16,832 --> 00:40:19,291
-To find them, I don't like this!
-What are you talking about?
623
00:40:19,457 --> 00:40:21,499
Tom and Howard know what they're doing,
they're fine!
624
00:40:21,707 --> 00:40:23,624
-Are they?
Mom?
625
00:40:23,916 --> 00:40:25,374
Honey, I'll be right back,
I promise.
626
00:40:25,541 --> 00:40:26,749
-Just lock the door--
627
00:40:26,916 --> 00:40:29,166
Oh God!
-Max, get the first aid kit!
628
00:40:29,332 --> 00:40:30,749
-Close the door!
-Sarah, lock the door!
629
00:40:30,916 --> 00:40:32,707
Girls!
Make some room for your dad!
630
00:40:32,874 --> 00:40:34,624
Oh my God!
631
00:40:34,791 --> 00:40:36,791
-Where's Beth?
We heard gunshots!
632
00:40:36,957 --> 00:40:39,082
I'll explain everything,
but right now everybody just needs
633
00:40:39,249 --> 00:40:40,957
to stay calm and stay inside!
634
00:40:41,124 --> 00:40:42,624
Get away from the windows!
635
00:40:42,791 --> 00:40:44,624
Swords, guns, knives, pots, pans!
636
00:40:44,791 --> 00:40:45,874
-Get whatever you can!
-Howard!
637
00:40:46,041 --> 00:40:48,332
-What?
-Not here.
638
00:40:50,624 --> 00:40:52,749
Jiminy Christmas, what happened out there?
639
00:40:54,041 --> 00:40:56,707
Nothin', it's just a scratch.
640
00:40:57,207 --> 00:40:58,582
Oh my God, it looks like
something bit you!
641
00:40:58,749 --> 00:40:59,999
Nope!
642
00:41:00,166 --> 00:41:02,166
Probably a bear trap
under the snow or something.
643
00:41:02,582 --> 00:41:03,707
We don't have bears here.
644
00:41:07,166 --> 00:41:08,249
Okay, um...
645
00:41:09,291 --> 00:41:11,582
Kids, why don't you go into the kitchen
and get something to eat now, okay?
646
00:41:11,749 --> 00:41:13,874
Oh, come on, you just don't wanna tell us
what's really going on here!
647
00:41:14,041 --> 00:41:15,374
Everybody, in the kitchen right now, Max!
648
00:41:15,541 --> 00:41:17,791
-Okay, right now!
-Come on, let's go. Girls, come on.
649
00:41:17,957 --> 00:41:19,082
It's okay.
650
00:41:19,582 --> 00:41:21,249
Aunt Dorothy, will you keep
an eye on them?
651
00:41:21,416 --> 00:41:22,416
Why me?
652
00:41:22,582 --> 00:41:24,999
I never liked kids, even when I was one!
653
00:41:27,416 --> 00:41:28,416
Please.
654
00:41:28,957 --> 00:41:30,332
Oh, all right.
655
00:41:31,082 --> 00:41:32,082
All right!
656
00:41:32,957 --> 00:41:34,124
Come on, guys, I'm gonna teach you
657
00:41:34,291 --> 00:41:35,999
how to make peppermint schnapps.
658
00:41:40,291 --> 00:41:41,291
Mom.
659
00:41:41,749 --> 00:41:44,416
Mom, will you please go into the kitchen
and help with the kids?
660
00:41:54,666 --> 00:41:55,874
Oh!
Come here, baby.
661
00:41:59,082 --> 00:42:02,374
See, a little sugar and a little spice...
662
00:42:05,291 --> 00:42:07,832
Makes everything nice!
663
00:42:10,332 --> 00:42:11,791
Mmm!
664
00:42:17,582 --> 00:42:20,457
All right, but don't you rat me out.
665
00:42:22,791 --> 00:42:25,707
But who or what did all this?
666
00:42:26,791 --> 00:42:28,499
Your guess is as good as mine.
667
00:42:30,291 --> 00:42:31,791
First I thought it was a gang thing--
668
00:42:33,124 --> 00:42:35,624
...but between this and
all the crazy stuff we saw out there,
669
00:42:36,041 --> 00:42:37,416
it just doesn't add up.
670
00:42:37,916 --> 00:42:39,499
It could be terrorists, right?
671
00:42:39,666 --> 00:42:40,916
Yeah, terrorists.
672
00:42:41,082 --> 00:42:43,416
They traded in their suicide vests
for rabid snow dogs?
673
00:42:43,582 --> 00:42:44,707
Tommy, ah!
674
00:42:45,041 --> 00:42:46,707
-Tom, God!
-Sorry, sorry.
675
00:42:47,249 --> 00:42:49,207
And, um,
676
00:42:50,291 --> 00:42:51,291
Beth?
677
00:42:51,582 --> 00:42:53,166
Okay, she wasn't at Derek's,
678
00:42:53,332 --> 00:42:54,416
but that doesn't mean anything.
679
00:42:54,582 --> 00:42:56,457
-She may have found somewhere safe.
-So she's still out there.
680
00:42:56,624 --> 00:42:58,541
Yes, and we will find her, I promise,
681
00:42:58,707 --> 00:43:00,207
but I had to make sure you guys were safe.
682
00:43:00,374 --> 00:43:02,624
-I had to get Howard--
-l don't care how long it takes, Tom,
683
00:43:02,791 --> 00:43:05,166
we have to keep looking.
We have to pair up and take turns--
684
00:43:05,332 --> 00:43:06,707
-Yes--
-We can't go back out there!
685
00:43:06,874 --> 00:43:07,874
You see this?
686
00:43:08,041 --> 00:43:10,166
It's damn near frostbite in
under four minutes!
687
00:43:10,332 --> 00:43:11,416
Honey, keep your voice down.
688
00:43:11,582 --> 00:43:13,457
Besides it being sub-zero out there,
689
00:43:13,791 --> 00:43:15,832
someone's tearing through
your fancy-ass neighborhood
690
00:43:15,999 --> 00:43:17,666
picking everybody off, it's the truth!
691
00:43:17,832 --> 00:43:20,582
Honey, sweetheart, listen,
why don't we just leave, right?
692
00:43:20,749 --> 00:43:23,332
We can all pile in the truck
and we'll just see as far as we can get
693
00:43:23,499 --> 00:43:25,291
-and--and we pick up Beth--
The truck's gone.
694
00:43:25,707 --> 00:43:26,707
Torn to pieces.
695
00:43:26,874 --> 00:43:28,832
What?
Yeah, and even if she wasn't,
696
00:43:28,999 --> 00:43:30,582
the streets are totally screwed.
697
00:43:30,749 --> 00:43:33,582
We can't go anywhere.
It's too dangerous, you got it?
698
00:43:33,749 --> 00:43:35,249
Howard, how much ammo do you have?
699
00:43:36,791 --> 00:43:38,874
A couple shells still loaded,
maybe a dozen in my pocket.
700
00:43:39,041 --> 00:43:40,041
Why?
701
00:43:40,791 --> 00:43:42,666
I think our best bet is to stay put.
702
00:43:43,749 --> 00:43:45,499
Board up all the doors and windows.
703
00:43:46,457 --> 00:43:48,541
And, as soon as the weather breaks,
we'll go find her.
704
00:43:48,707 --> 00:43:50,124
I told you we should've
gone to my brother's!
705
00:43:50,291 --> 00:43:52,207
Sure, Howard, Christmas on a pig farm!
706
00:43:52,374 --> 00:43:54,582
-Jesus was born in a barn!
Knock it off, you guys!
707
00:43:54,749 --> 00:43:56,374
What about the kids,
what are we gonna tell them?
708
00:43:56,541 --> 00:43:57,666
I don't know, the truth?
709
00:43:57,916 --> 00:43:59,541
Sure, which version of it?
710
00:44:00,582 --> 00:44:02,457
-Hey, you guys!
-Oh, God.
711
00:44:02,707 --> 00:44:04,041
How much of that did you hear?
712
00:44:04,749 --> 00:44:05,749
Enough.
713
00:44:06,124 --> 00:44:08,249
Mama, did someone take Beth?
714
00:44:08,416 --> 00:44:09,916
-Are they coming for us?
-No!
715
00:44:10,082 --> 00:44:12,166
No, babies, no, everything's fine.
716
00:44:12,332 --> 00:44:14,166
Beth's just with her boyfriend,
that's all.
717
00:44:14,791 --> 00:44:16,916
And nothing bad's gonna happen
on Christmas, right?
718
00:44:17,582 --> 00:44:18,791
You know what, let's have a camp-out,
okay?
719
00:44:18,957 --> 00:44:20,332
We'll watch a movie, yeah?
720
00:44:20,499 --> 00:44:22,624
Let's get cozy on the couch.
Go get your sister, Stevie.
721
00:44:22,791 --> 00:44:24,374
Come on, baby, come on.
722
00:44:24,541 --> 00:44:25,749
We'll find her, I promise.
723
00:44:32,082 --> 00:44:35,291
"And lo, the angel of
the Lord came upon them.
724
00:44:35,457 --> 00:44:37,916
And the glory of the Lord
shone round about them.
725
00:44:38,082 --> 00:44:39,791
And they were so afraid.
726
00:44:39,957 --> 00:44:41,791
-And the angel said unto them...”
727
00:44:41,957 --> 00:44:43,957
"'Fear not, for, behold,
I bring you..."
728
00:44:44,124 --> 00:44:45,749
Won't the battery die?
729
00:44:47,374 --> 00:44:48,582
Gotta die sometime.
730
00:44:49,082 --> 00:44:50,582
Might as well enjoy it while we can.
731
00:44:50,749 --> 00:44:51,832
"A Savior,
732
00:44:51,999 --> 00:44:55,041
-which is Christ the Lord.”
733
00:44:55,541 --> 00:44:56,541
Hey.
734
00:44:57,707 --> 00:44:58,874
Beth's a tough girl.
735
00:45:00,416 --> 00:45:01,832
Takes after her mom.
736
00:45:03,541 --> 00:45:04,749
I'm sure she's fine.
737
00:45:05,666 --> 00:45:06,666
Thank you.
738
00:45:15,291 --> 00:45:16,499
Hey, Tommy?
739
00:45:17,041 --> 00:45:18,041
I, um...
740
00:45:20,832 --> 00:45:23,624
I just wanna say thanks for, uh, you know,
741
00:45:25,041 --> 00:45:26,582
saving my ass back there.
742
00:45:27,499 --> 00:45:28,916
Oh, well,
743
00:45:30,082 --> 00:45:31,499
sure, no problem.
744
00:45:38,166 --> 00:45:40,416
And I just wanna say I'm sorry for...
745
00:45:42,207 --> 00:45:44,832
thinking you're such a spineless
dick all these years.
746
00:45:47,916 --> 00:45:48,916
Yeah.
747
00:45:53,791 --> 00:45:55,166
You should get some sleep, pal.
748
00:45:55,332 --> 00:45:56,582
How?
749
00:45:56,749 --> 00:45:58,374
Hm, good point.
750
00:46:03,541 --> 00:46:04,541
Hey, Dad?
751
00:46:05,916 --> 00:46:07,041
Are we gonna die?
752
00:46:08,166 --> 00:46:10,082
Hey. No, no, no.
753
00:46:11,999 --> 00:46:12,999
No.
754
00:46:15,457 --> 00:46:16,666
Omi's been acting different.
755
00:46:18,166 --> 00:46:19,499
Ever since the storm.
756
00:46:20,291 --> 00:46:22,207
Yeah, well, you know,
757
00:46:25,874 --> 00:46:27,749
she always gets
a little weird around Christmas.
758
00:46:29,832 --> 00:46:30,832
How come?
759
00:46:31,124 --> 00:46:32,832
I don't know, she never wanted
to talk about it.
760
00:46:34,207 --> 00:46:35,499
Max, come on.
761
00:46:36,082 --> 00:46:37,166
Time for bed.
762
00:46:38,582 --> 00:46:39,707
It's gonna be fine.
763
00:46:46,999 --> 00:46:47,999
All right.
764
00:47:03,082 --> 00:47:05,749
You know, Linda and I,
we butt heads, but...
765
00:47:07,791 --> 00:47:09,499
I can't imagine life without her.
766
00:47:12,791 --> 00:47:14,082
Yeah, I know what you mean.
767
00:47:15,624 --> 00:47:17,707
One of us should probably
stay up and keep watch.
768
00:47:19,916 --> 00:47:21,624
That's a good idea. I'll go first.
769
00:47:21,791 --> 00:47:24,416
No, you go ahead and catch some
winks with your family.
770
00:47:24,582 --> 00:47:25,999
-Are you sure?
Yeah.
771
00:47:28,041 --> 00:47:29,666
A shepherd's gotta protect his flock.
772
00:47:31,957 --> 00:47:33,457
-Night, Howard.
-Good night.
773
00:47:41,082 --> 00:47:44,291
♪ Silent night ♪
774
00:47:45,999 --> 00:47:50,624
♪ Holy night ♪
775
00:47:51,541 --> 00:47:56,332
♪ All is calm ♪
776
00:47:56,832 --> 00:48:01,374
♪ All is bright ♪
777
00:48:02,457 --> 00:48:07,457
♪ Round yon virgin ♪
778
00:48:07,707 --> 00:48:12,624
♪ Mother and child ♪
779
00:48:13,207 --> 00:48:20,207
♪ Holy infant so tender and mild ♪
780
00:48:24,166 --> 00:48:31,166
♪ Sleep in heavenly peace ♪
781
00:50:39,207 --> 00:50:40,666
Mom!
782
00:50:41,249 --> 00:50:42,541
-Mom!
783
00:50:43,916 --> 00:50:45,957
-Howie!
Dad, Dad!
784
00:50:46,124 --> 00:50:47,832
Mom!
785
00:50:47,999 --> 00:50:49,999
Hang on, Howie!
786
00:50:51,457 --> 00:50:53,416
Dad!
787
00:50:54,749 --> 00:50:56,207
Sarah, hold on, Sarah!
788
00:50:56,374 --> 00:50:57,374
-Mom!
789
00:50:57,541 --> 00:50:58,832
Howie, hold on!
790
00:51:04,249 --> 00:51:06,166
-Howie, hold on!
791
00:51:11,291 --> 00:51:12,749
I got you!
-Hold on!
792
00:51:21,957 --> 00:51:23,707
Max, get the fire extinguisher!
793
00:51:23,874 --> 00:51:26,291
Tom, help!
794
00:51:26,457 --> 00:51:27,582
Help me, help me!
795
00:51:27,749 --> 00:51:28,999
Sarah!
796
00:51:29,166 --> 00:51:31,499
I got you!
797
00:51:33,166 --> 00:51:34,416
Pull me down!
798
00:51:34,582 --> 00:51:37,832
-I got you!
799
00:51:44,624 --> 00:51:46,749
No!
-No! .
800
00:51:46,916 --> 00:51:47,999
-Hey!
801
00:51:48,166 --> 00:51:50,207
No, Howie!
802
00:51:50,374 --> 00:51:52,124
-No, no, no!
803
00:51:52,291 --> 00:51:55,166
-Oh my God, oh, my God!
804
00:52:08,541 --> 00:52:10,832
Honey, are you okay?
Are you hurt?
805
00:52:11,166 --> 00:52:12,166
Hon?
806
00:52:12,374 --> 00:52:16,457
-What un...holy thing was that?
807
00:52:19,582 --> 00:52:20,582
Howard.
808
00:52:20,749 --> 00:52:22,166
-Howard.
809
00:52:23,957 --> 00:52:24,999
-It's my fault.
-No.
810
00:52:25,166 --> 00:52:26,832
I--1 fell asleep!
811
00:52:27,499 --> 00:52:29,457
And they got our boy.
It's all my fault!
812
00:52:40,707 --> 00:52:41,874
Tom, what's she saying?
813
00:52:42,999 --> 00:52:45,124
This is all of our fault?
814
00:52:45,791 --> 00:52:47,541
He's come for us all?
815
00:52:48,582 --> 00:52:49,916
He who?
816
00:52:50,791 --> 00:52:52,374
-Who's he?
-l--1 don't know.
817
00:52:52,541 --> 00:52:53,874
Mom, what are you talking about?
818
00:52:54,041 --> 00:52:55,916
Please. Listen.
819
00:52:56,291 --> 00:52:58,041
English, I knew it.
820
00:52:59,457 --> 00:53:01,082
I must tell you something.
821
00:53:01,874 --> 00:53:02,874
All of you.
822
00:53:05,957 --> 00:53:09,124
It started with the wind.
823
00:53:13,082 --> 00:53:16,541
On a cold winter night, much like this.
824
00:53:18,499 --> 00:53:20,499
It was almost Christmas,
825
00:53:22,124 --> 00:53:24,624
but this Christmas was darker,
826
00:53:25,791 --> 00:53:26,957
less cheerful.
827
00:53:29,999 --> 00:53:32,499
But I still believed in Santa,
828
00:53:34,332 --> 00:53:35,624
in magic...
829
00:53:36,749 --> 00:53:38,332
and miracles
830
00:53:39,624 --> 00:53:43,457
and the hope that we could find joy again.
831
00:53:45,457 --> 00:53:47,499
But our village had given up,
832
00:53:47,666 --> 00:53:48,916
-on miracles...
833
00:53:49,082 --> 00:53:53,416
-...and on each other.
834
00:53:54,666 --> 00:53:57,582
They had forgotten
the spirit of Christmas.
835
00:53:58,166 --> 00:54:00,166
The sacrifice of giving.
836
00:54:02,957 --> 00:54:05,999
And my family was no different.
837
00:54:10,207 --> 00:54:13,541
I tried to help them to believe again,
838
00:54:13,707 --> 00:54:18,124
but we were no longer
the loving family I remembered.
839
00:54:21,874 --> 00:54:23,874
They, too, had given up.
840
00:54:26,041 --> 00:54:29,124
And, eventually, so did I.
841
00:54:32,249 --> 00:54:36,666
And, for the first time,
1 didn't wish for a miracle.
842
00:54:38,332 --> 00:54:40,749
I wished for them to go away.
843
00:54:42,791 --> 00:54:45,957
A wish I would come to regret.
844
00:54:49,082 --> 00:54:54,207
And that night, in the darkness of
a howling blizzard,
845
00:54:54,749 --> 00:54:56,707
I got my wish.
846
00:55:01,416 --> 00:55:05,999
I knew Saint Nicholas
was not coming this year.
847
00:55:09,207 --> 00:55:15,332
Instead, it was a much darker,
more ancient spirit.
848
00:55:18,791 --> 00:55:21,207
The shadow of Saint Nicholas.
849
00:55:22,249 --> 00:55:24,332
It was Krampus.
850
00:55:26,874 --> 00:55:29,957
And as he had for thousands of years,
851
00:55:30,957 --> 00:55:33,457
-Krampus came not to reward...
852
00:55:33,624 --> 00:55:35,249
...but to punish.
853
00:55:35,416 --> 00:55:39,499
-Not to give, but to take.
854
00:55:41,291 --> 00:55:43,582
He and his helpers.
855
00:55:46,624 --> 00:55:49,166
I could only listen as they dragged
856
00:55:49,332 --> 00:55:52,207
my family into the underworld,
857
00:55:52,374 --> 00:55:56,249
-knowing that I would be next.
858
00:55:57,957 --> 00:56:01,624
But Krampus didn't take me that night.
859
00:56:03,916 --> 00:56:10,416
He left me as a reminder of what
happens when hope is lost,
860
00:56:11,041 --> 00:56:13,124
when belief is forgotten,
861
00:56:14,457 --> 00:56:17,916
and the Christmas spirit dies.
862
00:56:33,749 --> 00:56:35,541
And here I thought
I was the one losin' it.
863
00:56:35,707 --> 00:56:37,374
-Howard.
-What?
864
00:56:38,332 --> 00:56:41,082
-You believe this senile horseshit?
-l don't know.
865
00:56:41,249 --> 00:56:43,749
Evil Santa? Jesus H. Almighty!
866
00:56:44,541 --> 00:56:47,332
She'll be yammerin' about
a rabid Easter Bunny come spring!
867
00:56:47,499 --> 00:56:48,541
Howard, that's enough.
868
00:56:52,666 --> 00:56:54,249
You're damn right it's enough.
869
00:56:54,874 --> 00:56:55,957
Whoever the hell's messing with us
870
00:56:56,124 --> 00:56:57,832
took my boy and your daughter,
871
00:56:57,999 --> 00:57:01,041
and we're sittin' around listenin'
to some twisted bedtime story?
872
00:57:04,416 --> 00:57:05,666
Screw that!
873
00:57:05,832 --> 00:57:06,999
-I'm getting' Howie back.
-Hey!
874
00:57:07,166 --> 00:57:08,541
-Daddy, Daddy, don't go!
-Howard, what are you doing?
875
00:57:08,707 --> 00:57:10,499
-Tommy, don't! Don't, Tommy!
876
00:57:10,666 --> 00:57:12,124
Daddy, don't!
-Whoa, whoa!
877
00:57:14,957 --> 00:57:17,707
I'm starting to like you, I am,
878
00:57:18,957 --> 00:57:20,416
but this is my choice.
879
00:57:20,582 --> 00:57:21,791
Howard, what are you doing?
880
00:57:22,124 --> 00:57:23,874
We've got four other kids here to protect.
881
00:57:25,332 --> 00:57:27,082
-Howard.
-Baby, please don't do this.
882
00:57:27,249 --> 00:57:30,124
Listen, we can figure
something else out, okay? Honey?
883
00:57:30,541 --> 00:57:32,416
This is how I figure things out.
884
00:57:32,791 --> 00:57:33,999
Howard, you don't wanna do this.
885
00:57:34,166 --> 00:57:35,374
-Howard!
886
00:57:35,541 --> 00:57:38,124
Howard!
887
00:57:42,999 --> 00:57:44,999
Howie!
888
00:57:50,082 --> 00:57:51,207
Howie!
889
00:57:55,957 --> 00:57:58,374
No, no, no, shut the door!
Inside, shut it!
890
00:58:08,499 --> 00:58:11,582
-Don't open the door.
891
00:58:11,749 --> 00:58:12,749
Dad?
892
00:58:14,082 --> 00:58:15,082
What are we gonna do now?
893
00:58:16,707 --> 00:58:18,207
We keep the fire hot.
894
00:58:45,541 --> 00:58:47,041
It's from my Halloween stash.
895
00:58:47,749 --> 00:58:48,749
Thanks.
896
00:59:38,499 --> 00:59:40,124
Think you'll be all right for a minute?
897
00:59:42,041 --> 00:59:43,624
-Yeah.
-Okay.
898
00:59:43,791 --> 00:59:44,791
Love you.
899
00:59:46,957 --> 00:59:49,999
We need to talk to Omi about
what's going on.
900
00:59:50,166 --> 00:59:51,166
Yeah.
901
01:00:03,541 --> 01:00:05,874
Omi, can we ask you something?
902
01:00:22,957 --> 01:00:24,791
-Hey.
903
01:00:26,874 --> 01:00:30,582
When they took Howie,
what did you see up there?
904
01:00:33,624 --> 01:00:35,916
You believe that story, right?
905
01:00:37,791 --> 01:00:38,791
Do you?
906
01:00:39,791 --> 01:00:41,541
I don't know what I believe anymore.
907
01:00:42,416 --> 01:00:44,457
I know I'm going out there to find Beth,
I have to.
908
01:00:44,624 --> 01:00:46,041
I--1 don't even care if I die trying.
909
01:00:46,207 --> 01:00:48,749
No, listen, let's get Howard and Linda.
910
01:00:48,916 --> 01:00:50,041
I have an idea.
911
01:00:58,332 --> 01:01:00,874
But what if you've been good,
like, all year?
912
01:01:02,416 --> 01:01:03,999
And you leave out milk and cookies
913
01:01:04,166 --> 01:01:05,416
and do everything else right?
914
01:01:17,707 --> 01:01:20,374
It's not what you do,
it's what you believe,
915
01:01:21,791 --> 01:01:24,957
and what you've given up in here.
916
01:01:26,874 --> 01:01:28,666
But can't we make him go away?
917
01:01:35,416 --> 01:01:36,707
What's she saying?
918
01:01:37,082 --> 01:01:38,166
I'm not sure.
919
01:01:38,582 --> 01:01:39,707
She says we're fucked.
920
01:01:41,249 --> 01:01:42,249
Eh.
921
01:01:43,624 --> 01:01:44,624
-How'd you--
-Because I'm old enough
922
01:01:44,791 --> 01:01:47,249
to know when life is
coming at you with his dick out.
923
01:02:41,541 --> 01:02:42,541
Linda?
924
01:02:44,624 --> 01:02:46,207
Can we talk with you and
Howard for a minute?
925
01:02:46,582 --> 01:02:47,749
Can it wait?
926
01:02:49,082 --> 01:02:51,249
I just wanna get these
rewrapped for the kids.
927
01:02:52,624 --> 01:02:53,749
It's important.
928
01:02:54,416 --> 01:02:55,416
The snowplow?
929
01:02:55,582 --> 01:02:56,916
The keys were in the ignition
930
01:02:57,082 --> 01:02:59,624
and it was beat to hell, but, if it runs,
931
01:02:59,791 --> 01:03:02,832
I drive it back here,
then everyone piles in the car
932
01:03:02,999 --> 01:03:05,416
and follows while
I clear a path in front of us.
933
01:03:06,416 --> 01:03:07,541
And go where?
934
01:03:08,374 --> 01:03:10,624
The mall doubles as an emergency shelter.
935
01:03:10,916 --> 01:03:13,332
And, if it's empty,
we'll try the police station.
936
01:03:14,124 --> 01:03:15,749
And what if they're gone too?
937
01:03:15,916 --> 01:03:19,916
Then we keep driving 'til
we see lights or people,
938
01:03:20,374 --> 01:03:22,249
a plowed road,
somewhere safe for the kids.
939
01:03:22,582 --> 01:03:24,166
And then we bring help back here.
940
01:03:24,791 --> 01:03:25,916
For Beth and Howie.
941
01:03:26,457 --> 01:03:28,582
You're not thinkin' of going for the plow
by yourself, are you?
942
01:03:31,499 --> 01:03:33,666
Well, a shepherd has gotta
protect his flock.
943
01:04:29,124 --> 01:04:31,207
Hey, Stevie?
944
01:04:31,582 --> 01:04:32,666
What?
945
01:04:33,124 --> 01:04:36,541
I think Aunt Dorothy clogged up
the shitter.
946
01:04:37,624 --> 01:04:39,124
So use the one upstairs.
947
01:04:41,624 --> 01:04:43,666
What, you afraid to go by yourself?
948
01:04:44,707 --> 01:04:46,999
-Well.
Jesus.
949
01:04:47,166 --> 01:04:48,624
Come on.
950
01:04:48,791 --> 01:04:50,582
The plow is only three blocks away.
951
01:04:51,166 --> 01:04:54,499
Three blocks is gonna feel like
three miles in this mess.
952
01:04:56,791 --> 01:04:58,457
And what about that thing under the snow?
953
01:04:59,957 --> 01:05:01,541
We hurt it once, we can do it again.
954
01:05:09,082 --> 01:05:10,916
Hey, Stevie?
Yeah?
955
01:05:12,166 --> 01:05:13,374
Do you think they took Howie
956
01:05:13,541 --> 01:05:15,541
'cause of the time he painted the cats?
957
01:05:16,499 --> 01:05:17,791
I don't know, Jordan.
958
01:05:20,416 --> 01:05:21,499
Do you think he's dead?
959
01:05:22,124 --> 01:05:23,124
I don't know.
960
01:05:25,541 --> 01:05:26,582
Jordan?
961
01:05:29,707 --> 01:05:30,707
Stevie?
962
01:05:34,082 --> 01:05:35,082
Beth?
963
01:05:36,207 --> 01:05:37,207
Beth, you up there?
964
01:05:37,624 --> 01:05:40,124
Stevie? Jordan?
965
01:05:40,582 --> 01:05:41,832
What are you doing?
966
01:05:41,999 --> 01:05:43,457
Where have you been?
967
01:05:43,624 --> 01:05:45,082
Everyone's freaking out!
968
01:05:45,249 --> 01:05:47,082
Come up here and I'll show you.
969
01:05:47,249 --> 01:05:49,291
I've been waiting for you guys.
970
01:05:50,249 --> 01:05:52,416
-Hurry!
971
01:05:52,874 --> 01:05:53,999
Have you told Max yet?
972
01:05:54,624 --> 01:05:56,207
No, not yet.
973
01:05:56,957 --> 01:05:59,457
-What? Jordan?
974
01:05:59,624 --> 01:06:00,832
-Stevie?
975
01:06:03,666 --> 01:06:05,582
Where are they? Where did they go?
976
01:06:05,749 --> 01:06:08,374
They were just here.
I think they went to the bathroom.
977
01:06:08,541 --> 01:06:09,624
And you just let them go?
978
01:06:09,791 --> 01:06:11,207
-Was there another option?
979
01:06:14,499 --> 01:06:16,041
Jordan! Stevie!
980
01:06:16,207 --> 01:06:17,624
Linda!
-Jordan!
981
01:06:18,374 --> 01:06:19,374
Listen.
982
01:06:21,041 --> 01:06:22,249
Honey, who was that?
983
01:06:23,332 --> 01:06:24,874
Howard, stay here.
984
01:06:29,957 --> 01:06:31,416
Omi?
-Hmm?
985
01:06:32,082 --> 01:06:33,541
I think all this might be my fault.
986
01:06:48,666 --> 01:06:50,749
-Uncle Howard?
-Shh!
987
01:06:54,457 --> 01:06:55,457
Rosie.
988
01:06:56,791 --> 01:07:00,582
-Come here, girl.
989
01:07:00,749 --> 01:07:01,832
Useless turd.
990
01:07:03,374 --> 01:07:05,374
All right, wait here.
991
01:07:21,874 --> 01:07:23,291
Jordan?
992
01:07:23,916 --> 01:07:24,916
Stevie?
993
01:07:38,332 --> 01:07:40,374
Okay, okay.
994
01:07:46,249 --> 01:07:47,582
Jordan?
995
01:07:47,749 --> 01:07:48,749
Stevie?
996
01:08:02,041 --> 01:08:03,624
You guys.
997
01:08:12,124 --> 01:08:13,207
The hell is this?
998
01:08:20,666 --> 01:08:21,749
God damn it!
999
01:08:21,916 --> 01:08:24,166
-Shh, shh, shh, shh, shh.
1000
01:08:24,332 --> 01:08:26,332
It's okay, I got ya.
1001
01:08:27,416 --> 01:08:28,957
You're gonna be okay.
1002
01:08:29,124 --> 01:08:31,124
-Shh!
1003
01:09:41,916 --> 01:09:43,666
-Oh, come on!
1004
01:09:46,124 --> 01:09:47,124
Hey!
1005
01:09:47,291 --> 01:09:48,749
Oh my God!
What, what?
1006
01:09:48,916 --> 01:09:50,916
No!
1007
01:09:51,082 --> 01:09:55,041
-Oh, my God!
1008
01:09:59,291 --> 01:10:00,791
Shoot it, Tom, shoot it!
1009
01:10:00,957 --> 01:10:02,249
For God's sake, shoot it!
1010
01:10:07,791 --> 01:10:09,041
-Linda!
1011
01:10:18,791 --> 01:10:20,374
We should've gone to my brother's!
1012
01:10:35,999 --> 01:10:37,082
Where'd it go?
-l don't know!
1013
01:10:37,249 --> 01:10:38,624
Oh my God!
1014
01:11:08,082 --> 01:11:09,166
Oow!
1015
01:11:13,249 --> 01:11:14,457
-Bear!
-What?
1016
01:11:15,082 --> 01:11:16,124
-Bear!
1017
01:12:04,374 --> 01:12:05,957
You gotta be kidding me!
1018
01:12:16,291 --> 01:12:17,457
Merry Christmas, mother--
1019
01:12:17,624 --> 01:12:19,124
There he is! Charge!
1020
01:12:40,124 --> 01:12:41,666
Ah, that's a good girl.
1021
01:12:55,541 --> 01:12:56,999
Linda!
1022
01:13:09,957 --> 01:13:11,749
Stevie? Stevie!
1023
01:13:19,541 --> 01:13:20,541
Come here!
1024
01:13:39,416 --> 01:13:43,541
Hey! Give me back my kids, you...fudger!
1025
01:13:47,249 --> 01:13:48,707
Jordan!
1026
01:13:49,749 --> 01:13:51,582
Stevie.
1027
01:13:51,749 --> 01:13:52,999
I'm coming, baby!
1028
01:13:53,541 --> 01:13:54,749
Stevie, baby.
1029
01:13:54,916 --> 01:13:57,166
-It's okay, mama's here.
1030
01:13:57,332 --> 01:13:59,374
-Mama's here. There you go!
1031
01:13:59,541 --> 01:14:01,332
Mom, it got Jordan.
1032
01:14:01,499 --> 01:14:04,124
-It was gonna eat me next!
1033
01:14:05,957 --> 01:14:07,999
Thanks, honey.
1034
01:14:08,166 --> 01:14:09,749
-Are you okay?
Yeah, are you okay?
1035
01:14:25,124 --> 01:14:26,124
What?
1036
01:14:27,499 --> 01:14:28,499
Mom!
1037
01:14:29,416 --> 01:14:30,874
-Max!
1038
01:14:31,374 --> 01:14:32,374
Come on, baby.
1039
01:14:32,541 --> 01:14:34,332
Come on, baby, it's okay.
1040
01:14:35,166 --> 01:14:36,166
Max, are you okay?
1041
01:14:36,332 --> 01:14:37,791
-Yeah.
-What happened up there?
1042
01:14:38,166 --> 01:14:39,166
They got Jordan.
1043
01:14:39,416 --> 01:14:42,499
-Who?
1044
01:14:46,999 --> 01:14:47,999
Mom?
1045
01:14:48,707 --> 01:14:50,999
I think it's panicking,
trying to get outside.
1046
01:14:51,624 --> 01:14:54,041
-Well, we boarded everything up.
1047
01:14:54,249 --> 01:14:55,874
Howard, that's Jordan.
1048
01:14:56,499 --> 01:14:58,624
We gotta get in there, we gotta
get in there and get her out.
1049
01:14:59,207 --> 01:15:01,041
Linda, what are we dealing with?
What did you see up there?
1050
01:15:01,957 --> 01:15:03,457
You don't wanna know, sweetheart.
1051
01:15:03,916 --> 01:15:06,374
Honey, I just got my ass kicked
1052
01:15:06,541 --> 01:15:09,541
by a bunch of Christmas cookies,
so trust me when I say I can take it!
1053
01:15:09,707 --> 01:15:10,749
-Shh, shh, shh!
1054
01:15:21,499 --> 01:15:24,082
-No, no, no, Max, what are you doing?
1055
01:15:24,249 --> 01:15:26,666
-Go get 'em, girl!
1056
01:15:35,957 --> 01:15:37,749
-Get 'em, Rosie.
1057
01:15:56,457 --> 01:15:57,457
Rosie?
1058
01:16:16,874 --> 01:16:19,666
-For God's sake, Howard, shoot it!
1059
01:16:21,166 --> 01:16:22,207
No, no!
-Dad! -
1060
01:16:23,332 --> 01:16:25,332
-Get it off!
-Dad!
1061
01:16:25,499 --> 01:16:27,874
-You bitch!
1062
01:16:36,582 --> 01:16:38,666
Dad, no!
1063
01:16:38,832 --> 01:16:40,832
Dad!
1064
01:16:40,999 --> 01:16:42,291
-Omi!
1065
01:16:59,291 --> 01:17:00,666
Aunt Dorothy?
1066
01:17:01,166 --> 01:17:02,957
-Finish it.
-With pleasure!
1067
01:17:11,957 --> 01:17:12,957
Aw, shit!
1068
01:17:17,666 --> 01:17:18,874
Max!
1069
01:17:20,291 --> 01:17:21,624
Mom!
1070
01:17:21,791 --> 01:17:24,999
Stay behind me!
1071
01:17:55,332 --> 01:17:56,332
Howard, where's Chrissy?
1072
01:17:56,499 --> 01:17:58,124
-I don't know!
-Where's the baby?
1073
01:17:58,291 --> 01:18:00,124
Honey, where's your sister?
1074
01:18:02,791 --> 01:18:03,832
No!
1075
01:18:03,999 --> 01:18:06,541
No, Linda, no!
Howard!
1076
01:18:06,707 --> 01:18:08,624
Howard, the baby!
1077
01:18:09,249 --> 01:18:10,749
See you in hell!
1078
01:18:13,541 --> 01:18:16,082
Twisted fairytale horseshit!
1079
01:18:16,249 --> 01:18:17,457
Howard, no!
1080
01:18:20,124 --> 01:18:22,749
-Oh, great!
1081
01:18:51,957 --> 01:18:54,082
Are you okay?
Are you okay?
1082
01:18:55,666 --> 01:18:57,166
Max, get the ammo!
1083
01:19:00,124 --> 01:19:01,999
Wait, where did they go?
1084
01:19:02,332 --> 01:19:03,666
I'm more worried about when
they come back.
1085
01:19:03,832 --> 01:19:05,041
We need to make a break for it.
1086
01:19:05,207 --> 01:19:06,499
For what, Tom?
1087
01:19:06,666 --> 01:19:08,499
The snowplow. It's our only shot.
1088
01:19:08,916 --> 01:19:09,957
And then we're going after 'em.
1089
01:19:11,457 --> 01:19:12,999
What is going on?
1090
01:19:13,541 --> 01:19:15,041
Sarah, what's going on?
1091
01:19:15,207 --> 01:19:16,416
Mom, come on, we're leaving.
1092
01:19:17,291 --> 01:19:18,374
You're gonna be okay.
1093
01:19:20,499 --> 01:19:23,166
Mom, we have to go, now!
1094
01:19:27,166 --> 01:19:28,166
It's him.
1095
01:19:29,999 --> 01:19:32,624
♪ Up on the housetop reindeer pause ♪
1096
01:19:32,791 --> 01:19:35,374
♪ Out jumps good old Santa Claus ♪
1097
01:19:35,541 --> 01:19:38,291
♪ Down through the chimney
with lots of toys ♪
1098
01:19:38,457 --> 01:19:39,582
♪ All for the little one's ♪
1099
01:19:39,749 --> 01:19:41,041
-Let's go.
♪ Christmas joys ♪
1100
01:19:41,207 --> 01:19:43,707
♪ Ho ho ho ♪
-Max, Max, come, come, come!
1101
01:19:44,332 --> 01:19:45,499
Okay, come on.
1102
01:19:47,374 --> 01:19:48,874
Let's tie it up.
Let's do our best.
1103
01:19:49,041 --> 01:19:50,582
Hurry!
Get your gloves on.
1104
01:19:50,749 --> 01:19:51,916
Here, put your hood up.
1105
01:19:52,707 --> 01:19:55,249
♪ First comes the stocking
of little Nell ♪
1106
01:19:55,416 --> 01:19:57,124
-Okay, ready?
♪ Oh dear Santa ♪
1107
01:19:58,499 --> 01:20:01,541
♪ Give her a dolly that laughs and cries ♪
1108
01:20:01,707 --> 01:20:04,582
Everybody just hold onto each other.
1109
01:20:15,124 --> 01:20:16,832
-Omi!
1110
01:20:17,207 --> 01:20:18,207
Be good.
1111
01:20:18,624 --> 01:20:20,832
Omi! Omi!
1112
01:20:20,999 --> 01:20:22,707
-Omi, no!
1113
01:20:24,249 --> 01:20:26,041
-Omi!
1114
01:20:26,207 --> 01:20:27,707
Mom!
1115
01:20:27,874 --> 01:20:29,332
-Mom, open the door!
1116
01:20:29,499 --> 01:20:31,582
. -Mom!
1117
01:20:31,749 --> 01:20:33,916
Mom, you open this door now!
1118
01:20:35,707 --> 01:20:37,582
-The window.
1119
01:20:37,749 --> 01:20:38,791
Dad!
1120
01:20:38,957 --> 01:20:41,041
She wants to face him!
1121
01:20:41,207 --> 01:20:42,249
She's trying to help!
1122
01:20:46,707 --> 01:20:48,499
-Let's go.
1123
01:20:49,207 --> 01:20:50,957
Let's go, let's go, go!
1124
01:20:58,541 --> 01:21:01,249
- Ho ho ho, who wouldn't go
1125
01:21:01,416 --> 01:21:04,082
- Ho ho ho, who wouldn't go
1126
01:21:04,249 --> 01:21:05,582
♪ Up on the housetop ♪
1127
01:21:05,749 --> 01:21:07,082
♪ Click, click, click ♪
1128
01:21:07,249 --> 01:21:11,916
♪ Down through the chimney
with good Saint Nick ♪
1129
01:23:09,707 --> 01:23:10,874
Keep moving!
1130
01:23:30,041 --> 01:23:32,791
Go! Go, get behind me, go!
1131
01:23:33,541 --> 01:23:35,416
Go, go, go, keep moving!
1132
01:23:35,999 --> 01:23:37,249
Come on, buddy!
1133
01:23:42,666 --> 01:23:43,666
Come on!
1134
01:23:56,374 --> 01:23:58,374
You have to go. You have to go.
1135
01:23:58,541 --> 01:23:59,791
-I need you to go!
-No.
1136
01:23:59,957 --> 01:24:02,874
All of you, you have to go,
do you understand?
1137
01:24:03,041 --> 01:24:05,291
Just keep driving!
Do you understand?
1138
01:24:08,832 --> 01:24:10,124
I love you!
1139
01:24:10,499 --> 01:24:11,874
I love you, buddy!
1140
01:24:12,541 --> 01:24:14,957
-Go, now, go!
1141
01:24:18,832 --> 01:24:19,832
Go!
1142
01:24:26,791 --> 01:24:27,791
-Come on!
1143
01:24:51,207 --> 01:24:54,541
Come on.
1144
01:24:56,416 --> 01:24:57,582
Keep going, keep going!
1145
01:24:57,749 --> 01:24:59,166
-Oh my God, get in!
1146
01:24:59,332 --> 01:25:01,832
I want you to get up in here
and I don't want you to move, okay?
1147
01:25:01,999 --> 01:25:03,416
You stay here, you don't move!
1148
01:25:04,999 --> 01:25:06,416
-Mom!
1149
01:25:06,582 --> 01:25:07,582
Okay, you understand?
1150
01:25:07,749 --> 01:25:10,416
-Mom, Mom, please!
1151
01:25:10,582 --> 01:25:13,166
Sarah!
Baby, go with your Aunt Sarah.
1152
01:25:13,916 --> 01:25:15,832
Sarah, go, go on!
1153
01:25:15,999 --> 01:25:17,749
Stevie, sweetheart, it's okay!
1154
01:25:17,916 --> 01:25:19,041
Mom!
-It's okay!
1155
01:25:19,207 --> 01:25:20,207
-Come on.
1156
01:25:20,374 --> 01:25:21,374
Sarah!
1157
01:25:22,124 --> 01:25:23,791
Stay here, I'll be right back!
1158
01:25:24,791 --> 01:25:27,082
Sarah!
1159
01:25:27,791 --> 01:25:29,457
Mom, no!
1160
01:25:29,832 --> 01:25:30,832
-I love you.
1161
01:25:30,999 --> 01:25:32,207
-Mom!
1162
01:25:32,374 --> 01:25:34,291
-Mom!
1163
01:25:39,249 --> 01:25:40,499
Max, we gotta go.
1164
01:25:40,999 --> 01:25:42,957
Max, we gotta go!
1165
01:25:43,207 --> 01:25:45,791
Max! Come on!
1166
01:25:47,457 --> 01:25:48,457
Come on!
1167
01:25:49,291 --> 01:25:51,041
It's not starting, it's not starting!
1168
01:25:51,374 --> 01:25:54,499
-Why isn't it starting? Come on!
-Come on, Max, please!
1169
01:25:54,666 --> 01:25:56,749
I'm trying!
I don't even know how to drive a stick!
1170
01:25:56,916 --> 01:25:58,291
We have a hybrid!
1171
01:25:58,457 --> 01:26:00,416
Come on, please!
1172
01:26:08,749 --> 01:26:10,832
Get off of me!
1173
01:26:14,124 --> 01:26:16,416
Stevie! Stevie!
1174
01:26:16,582 --> 01:26:17,582
Get off me!
1175
01:26:19,832 --> 01:26:22,749
-l said get off!
1176
01:26:32,249 --> 01:26:33,332
Max!
1177
01:26:36,666 --> 01:26:39,291
Max!
1178
01:26:39,457 --> 01:26:42,791
No, no, no, no!
1179
01:26:42,957 --> 01:26:43,999
-Max!
1180
01:26:44,166 --> 01:26:45,457
Stevie!
1181
01:27:31,207 --> 01:27:33,666
He left me as a reminder
1182
01:27:33,832 --> 01:27:38,041
of what happens when hope is lost,
1183
01:27:39,457 --> 01:27:41,541
when belief is forgotten,
1184
01:27:43,291 --> 01:27:46,624
and the Christmas spirit dies.
1185
01:28:01,832 --> 01:28:03,332
Help!
1186
01:28:05,999 --> 01:28:07,499
Help me, Max!
1187
01:28:12,624 --> 01:28:13,791
Max!
1188
01:28:25,916 --> 01:28:28,666
Get off of me!
1189
01:28:32,457 --> 01:28:33,957
Hey!
1190
01:28:34,207 --> 01:28:35,957
Asshole!
1191
01:28:48,124 --> 01:28:49,791
I take back my wish!
1192
01:28:50,749 --> 01:28:52,207
I take it all back!
1193
01:28:57,041 --> 01:28:59,624
Give me back my family!
1194
01:29:55,874 --> 01:29:58,499
Max!
1195
01:30:01,207 --> 01:30:02,957
Let her go!
1196
01:30:03,124 --> 01:30:05,166
Help, Max!
1197
01:30:25,457 --> 01:30:26,457
Please.
1198
01:30:27,457 --> 01:30:28,999
I know you can fix this.
1199
01:30:29,624 --> 01:30:30,874
Give them back!
1200
01:30:33,624 --> 01:30:34,957
Take me instead.
1201
01:31:12,332 --> 01:31:14,041
No, what are you doing?
I said take me.
1202
01:31:15,416 --> 01:31:16,582
No, take me!
-No, no, no!
1203
01:31:16,749 --> 01:31:19,416
-No, what are you doing? Take me!
No!
1204
01:31:20,749 --> 01:31:24,249
-Stevie!
1205
01:31:27,791 --> 01:31:29,999
No, let me go! Let me go!
1206
01:31:31,999 --> 01:31:33,374
No, no, please!
1207
01:31:42,457 --> 01:31:44,957
-I'm sorry.
1208
01:31:45,541 --> 01:31:47,541
I just wanted Christmas to be
like it used to be.
1209
01:31:52,541 --> 01:31:54,707
No!
1210
01:33:07,457 --> 01:33:09,041
Good throw, Aunt Sarah!
1211
01:33:10,041 --> 01:33:11,874
You want down?
You may learn a thing or two.
1212
01:33:12,041 --> 01:33:14,416
Thank you, I appreciate that.
Cookie? No, that's your cookie!
1213
01:33:14,582 --> 01:33:17,082
Hope this dog didn't keep you guys up,
she likes to bark at night.
1214
01:33:17,249 --> 01:33:19,249
-She sure does.
Rosie, come here!
1215
01:33:19,416 --> 01:33:21,874
Thanks for making pancakes.
♪ Have yourself ♪
1216
01:33:23,457 --> 01:33:27,166
♪ A merry little Christmas ♪
1217
01:33:27,791 --> 01:33:30,041
About time you got up,
we've been waiting forever!
1218
01:33:30,666 --> 01:33:32,499
Oh, hey, there he is! Hey, kiddo,
1219
01:33:32,666 --> 01:33:34,416
we thought the sugarplum fairies
may have gotten ya!
1220
01:33:35,541 --> 01:33:36,707
You're all alive.
1221
01:33:37,082 --> 01:33:38,957
Barely!
♪ From now own ♪
1222
01:33:39,124 --> 01:33:42,166
I haven't felt this hungover
since the pope died.
1223
01:33:42,749 --> 01:33:43,874
What's up, buddy, you okay?
1224
01:33:44,874 --> 01:33:45,916
Yeah, I just...
1225
01:33:48,374 --> 01:33:51,207
just had a bad dream, I guess.
1226
01:33:51,791 --> 01:33:53,707
-Aw!
♪ Have yourself ♪
1227
01:33:53,874 --> 01:33:56,332
Enough with the sappy crap!
Let's open up the damn presents.
1228
01:33:56,499 --> 01:33:59,124
Okay, okay, already!
Come on, Linda, let's do this,
1229
01:33:59,291 --> 01:34:00,749
-you wanna help me?
All right.
1230
01:34:02,124 --> 01:34:03,124
Okay.
1231
01:34:04,332 --> 01:34:06,624
Merry Christmas, Max.
1232
01:34:06,791 --> 01:34:08,832
Girls.
-l got two beverages.
1233
01:34:09,832 --> 01:34:12,666
♪ As in olden days ♪
1234
01:34:12,832 --> 01:34:14,291
Stevie, sweetheart.
1235
01:34:14,457 --> 01:34:16,291
Thanks, Mom.
Are you excited?
1236
01:34:16,457 --> 01:34:17,499
Yeah!
-Jordan.
1237
01:34:17,666 --> 01:34:18,749
You should be.
1238
01:34:20,457 --> 01:34:21,666
Oh ho ho ho!
1239
01:34:21,832 --> 01:34:22,874
Isn't that fun?
1240
01:34:23,749 --> 01:34:25,957
-Hey, Maxi-Pad!
-Training bagging gloves!
1241
01:34:27,332 --> 01:34:28,791
What could that possibly be?
1242
01:34:29,374 --> 01:34:30,874
-Oh, my God!
1243
01:34:31,041 --> 01:34:32,291
"Oh, my God," is right!
1244
01:34:32,457 --> 01:34:33,832
That's from me and the girls.
-Oh my!
1245
01:34:33,999 --> 01:34:35,624
I had to reattach the foot.
Disgusting!
1246
01:34:35,791 --> 01:34:37,791
But, yeah,
if you look closely, um,
1247
01:34:38,291 --> 01:34:40,666
he did a really good job
of reattaching it.
1248
01:34:43,207 --> 01:34:44,957
The darn thing,
when we came up on it...
1249
01:34:45,124 --> 01:34:47,291
-Oh, thank you.
This is great.
1250
01:34:50,291 --> 01:34:51,291
-Wow!
1251
01:34:51,457 --> 01:34:52,832
What's this all about?
1252
01:34:53,332 --> 01:34:55,541
It's--it's nothing. Just...
1253
01:34:56,291 --> 01:34:57,707
Merry Christmas.
1254
01:34:58,207 --> 01:35:00,166
Aw, well, Merry Christmas
to you, too, Max.
1255
01:35:00,332 --> 01:35:03,499
-Merry Christmas, son.
♪ Have yourself ♪
1256
01:35:04,166 --> 01:35:08,832
♪ A merry little Christmas now ♪
1257
01:35:08,999 --> 01:35:10,707
Oh my, I can't--
Right?
1258
01:35:10,874 --> 01:35:12,291
I cannot believe this.
1259
01:35:12,457 --> 01:35:13,999
This is the best!
1260
01:35:16,707 --> 01:35:17,749
Oh, man.
1261
01:35:29,707 --> 01:35:32,291
I/ just wanted Christmas to be
like it used to be.
1262
01:35:33,166 --> 01:35:35,291
That's what a family is, Max.
1263
01:35:35,457 --> 01:35:37,082
Nothing bad"s gonna happen
on Christmas, right?
1264
01:35:37,249 --> 01:35:40,249
/ just got my ass kicked
by a bunch of Christmas cookies,
1265
01:35:40,416 --> 01:35:41,916
so trust me when I say I can take it!
1266
01:35:42,082 --> 01:35:43,749
"They're why some people
shouldn't be allowed to breed!"
1267
01:35:44,124 --> 01:35:47,374
Do you think they took Howie
'cause of the time he painted the cats?
1268
01:35:50,207 --> 01:35:54,207
And as he had for thousands of years,
1269
01:35:54,374 --> 01:35:56,916
Krampus came not to reward,
1270
01:35:57,082 --> 01:35:58,457
but to punish.
1271
01:35:58,916 --> 01:36:00,457
Not to give,
1272
01:36:01,249 --> 01:36:02,791
but to take.
1273
01:36:11,582 --> 01:36:12,874
♪ You better watch out ♪
1274
01:36:13,041 --> 01:36:14,291
♪ You better not cry ♪
1275
01:36:14,457 --> 01:36:16,791
♪ You better not pout,
I'm telling you why ♪
1276
01:36:16,957 --> 01:36:20,916
♪ Why?
Santa Claus is coming to town ♪
1277
01:36:21,082 --> 01:36:22,666
♪ Gather round ♪
1278
01:36:22,832 --> 01:36:24,166
♪ He's making a list ♪
1279
01:36:24,332 --> 01:36:25,457
♪ And checking it twice ♪
1280
01:36:25,624 --> 01:36:28,624
♪ He's gonna find out who's
naughty and nice ♪
1281
01:36:28,791 --> 01:36:33,166
♪ Santa Claus is coming to town ♪
1282
01:36:33,791 --> 01:36:36,499
♪ He sees you when you're sleeping ♪
1283
01:36:36,666 --> 01:36:39,249
♪ He knows when you're awake ♪
1284
01:36:39,416 --> 01:36:41,874
♪ He knows if you've been bad or good ♪
1285
01:36:42,041 --> 01:36:45,166
♪ So be good for goodness sake ♪
1286
01:36:45,332 --> 01:36:46,541
♪ You better watch out ♪
1287
01:36:46,707 --> 01:36:47,999
♪ You better not cry ♪
1288
01:36:48,166 --> 01:36:50,874
♪ You better not pout,
I'm telling you why ♪
1289
01:36:51,041 --> 01:36:54,082
♪ Santa Claus is coming to town ♪
1290
01:40:58,666 --> 01:41:00,624
♪ Children take care,
please be aware ♪
1291
01:41:00,791 --> 01:41:02,832
♪ All that you've done
will come to bear ♪
1292
01:41:02,999 --> 01:41:04,957
♪ Have you been good?
Behaved as you should? ♪
1293
01:41:05,124 --> 01:41:07,207
♪ Those who have not,
it's understood ♪
1294
01:41:07,374 --> 01:41:09,332
♪ Krampus will come
looking for some ♪
1295
01:41:09,499 --> 01:41:11,541
♪ You are not safe,
best that you run ♪
1296
01:41:11,707 --> 01:41:13,666
♪ You're on his list,
not what you wished ♪
1297
01:41:13,832 --> 01:41:15,874
♪ This Christmas
you will be missed ♪
1298
01:41:16,041 --> 01:41:18,082
♪ There is someone watching over ♪
1299
01:41:18,249 --> 01:41:20,291
♪ All that you have done this year ♪
1300
01:41:20,457 --> 01:41:22,457
♪ Every little boy and girl
please listen ♪
1301
01:41:22,624 --> 01:41:24,624
♪ Keep Christmas spirit alive ♪
1302
01:41:24,791 --> 01:41:26,749
♪ If you believe, given reprieve ♪
1303
01:41:26,916 --> 01:41:28,874
♪ Don't lose your faith
next Christmas Eve ♪
1304
01:41:29,041 --> 01:41:31,166
♪ Christmas is real,
show how you feel ♪
1305
01:41:31,332 --> 01:41:33,332
♪ If you forget, your fate is sealed ♪
1306
01:41:33,499 --> 01:41:35,499
♪ As you grow old,
you have been told ♪
1307
01:41:35,666 --> 01:41:37,666
♪ Stay warm of heart,
keep out the cold ♪
1308
01:41:37,832 --> 01:41:39,874
♪ Now that you know,
reap what you sow ♪
1309
01:41:40,041 --> 01:41:41,999
♪ You have been warned,
you have been warned ♪
1310
01:41:42,166 --> 01:41:43,832
♪ All of you naughty children ♪
1311
01:41:43,999 --> 01:41:46,416
♪ Best prepare for some yuletide fear ♪
1312
01:41:46,582 --> 01:41:48,624
♪ This will be a very scary Christmas ♪
1313
01:41:48,791 --> 01:41:50,916
♪ If he finds you on his list ♪
1314
01:41:51,082 --> 01:41:52,999
♪ This will be a very scary Christmas ♪
1315
01:41:53,166 --> 01:41:55,041
♪ Quiet now I think he's here ♪