1
00:00:02,212 --> 00:00:04,214
(BAD TO THE BONE PLAYING)
2
00:00:46,047 --> 00:00:47,382
(GUNSHOTS)
3
00:01:24,085 --> 00:01:25,378
Let's move out!
4
00:01:25,462 --> 00:01:27,046
MAN: Get in front
of that wall!
5
00:01:27,130 --> 00:01:28,465
Follow me!
6
00:01:49,819 --> 00:01:50,820
(GROANING)
7
00:01:52,864 --> 00:01:55,658
My arm!
I've been shot!
8
00:01:55,742 --> 00:01:57,076
(GROANING)
9
00:01:58,870 --> 00:02:01,039
Let me take a look at that.
10
00:02:01,915 --> 00:02:04,334
Want me to show you
a little trick?
11
00:02:04,751 --> 00:02:06,836
Take your mind off that arm?
12
00:02:07,253 --> 00:02:08,922
Give me your hand.
13
00:02:09,005 --> 00:02:11,674
You may feel a little pressure.
14
00:02:14,511 --> 00:02:15,845
(SCREAMING)
15
00:02:17,889 --> 00:02:20,642
My finger! My finger!
16
00:02:21,059 --> 00:02:22,435
Works every time.
17
00:02:36,616 --> 00:02:38,284
(SPEAKING SPANISH)
18
00:02:50,922 --> 00:02:52,674
You had better give up, Señor.
19
00:02:52,757 --> 00:02:54,551
You cannot kill us all.
20
00:02:54,634 --> 00:02:57,846
Nope, but I can
clean your colon
out quicker
21
00:02:57,929 --> 00:03:01,266
than one of them
burritos with extra
guacamole sauce.
22
00:03:01,349 --> 00:03:03,017
ALL: Ooh.
23
00:03:24,664 --> 00:03:25,999
At ease, Payne.
24
00:03:29,294 --> 00:03:30,336
Relax.
25
00:03:30,420 --> 00:03:32,547
Do you know why you're here?
26
00:03:32,755 --> 00:03:34,215
Sir, no, sir.
27
00:03:35,216 --> 00:03:38,219
The promotion board report
came out last week.
28
00:03:38,887 --> 00:03:40,847
This is the new
lieutenant colonel list.
29
00:03:40,930 --> 00:03:42,807
Your name is not on it.
30
00:03:44,392 --> 00:03:46,686
You get two chances to advance,
31
00:03:46,769 --> 00:03:49,105
then we gotta
show you the hatch.
32
00:03:50,273 --> 00:03:53,610
Base admin is cutting
your discharge orders
right now.
33
00:03:54,652 --> 00:03:55,945
General,
34
00:03:56,446 --> 00:03:59,198
are you trying to tell me,
in all this man's military,
35
00:03:59,282 --> 00:04:02,952
there is no room left
for a trained weapon
of destruction?
36
00:04:03,453 --> 00:04:06,497
The fighting
is no longer done on
the battlefields, Payne.
37
00:04:06,581 --> 00:04:09,500
Now all the blood is shed
in the halls of Congress.
38
00:04:09,584 --> 00:04:12,086
Warriors like us
are becoming dinosaurs.
39
00:04:14,923 --> 00:04:17,842
There's gotta be somebody
needs some killing.
40
00:04:18,259 --> 00:04:20,845
I'm sorry, Major.
There's no one left.
41
00:04:21,304 --> 00:04:23,181
You've killed 'em all.
42
00:04:23,556 --> 00:04:24,891
Good luck.
43
00:04:34,025 --> 00:04:37,904
PAYNE:
It's been two whole weeks
since I killed me a man,
44
00:04:38,154 --> 00:04:41,366
and already I'm starting
to get the itch.
45
00:04:42,367 --> 00:04:45,745
Problem is,
I ain't got nothing
to scratch.
46
00:04:47,372 --> 00:04:49,165
God, I'm hungry.
47
00:04:50,500 --> 00:04:52,418
Hungry for action.
48
00:04:53,252 --> 00:04:55,797
Hungry for blood.
49
00:04:56,756 --> 00:04:57,924
Hell,
50
00:04:58,800 --> 00:05:01,970
I'm just plain old hungry.
51
00:05:04,514 --> 00:05:05,765
(CAT MEOWS)
52
00:05:05,848 --> 00:05:07,183
(HISSES)
53
00:05:08,559 --> 00:05:10,478
Feel I'm getting weaker
54
00:05:11,312 --> 00:05:14,857
while Charlie's
growing stronger
in the jungle.
55
00:05:15,692 --> 00:05:17,485
I can't lose my edge.
56
00:05:18,277 --> 00:05:20,405
I gotta keep my strength up.
57
00:05:20,822 --> 00:05:22,991
I gotta maintain discipline.
58
00:05:23,866 --> 00:05:26,285
Because the hard reality was,
59
00:05:27,036 --> 00:05:28,871
I gotta get a job.
60
00:05:30,206 --> 00:05:32,000
And what better place
61
00:05:32,333 --> 00:05:36,170
than somewhere
that would allow me
to employ my skills
62
00:05:36,587 --> 00:05:38,631
as a trained killer.
63
00:05:38,715 --> 00:05:40,883
Mr. Payne?
64
00:05:43,219 --> 00:05:46,681
This is a dramatization
of a domestic
violence dispute.
65
00:05:47,473 --> 00:05:49,225
You arrive
on the scene
to find a woman,
66
00:05:49,308 --> 00:05:51,269
played by Miss Goodwin...
67
00:05:51,352 --> 00:05:52,478
Hello, ma'am.
68
00:05:52,562 --> 00:05:54,482
Claiming to have
been assaulted
by her husband,
69
00:05:54,564 --> 00:05:56,733
played by
Mr. Shipman.
70
00:05:56,816 --> 00:05:57,900
Happy to meet you.
71
00:05:57,984 --> 00:05:59,360
Same here.
72
00:05:59,902 --> 00:06:03,531
Your objective is
to effectively
neutralize the situation.
73
00:06:04,365 --> 00:06:05,575
Neutralize.
74
00:06:07,744 --> 00:06:08,745
Begin.
75
00:06:09,495 --> 00:06:11,164
(CRYING)
76
00:06:11,247 --> 00:06:12,582
He hit me!
77
00:06:13,583 --> 00:06:14,834
You like to beat women?
78
00:06:14,917 --> 00:06:15,877
Officer...
79
00:06:15,960 --> 00:06:19,464
You'll never hit her again.
80
00:06:19,547 --> 00:06:21,132
Hear me? Hear me? Huh?
I can't...
81
00:06:21,215 --> 00:06:22,550
(GRUNTING)
82
00:06:23,593 --> 00:06:25,386
(BUZZER SOUNDS)
83
00:06:34,437 --> 00:06:37,690
Payne, what happened?
You've only
been out one week.
84
00:06:38,274 --> 00:06:42,487
It's civilian life, sir.
I had a minor setback.
85
00:06:42,987 --> 00:06:45,948
Listen, I made
some calls, and I got
an assignment for you.
86
00:06:46,032 --> 00:06:47,867
It's not great, you understand,
87
00:06:47,950 --> 00:06:50,495
but it gets you back
in the military.
88
00:06:52,288 --> 00:06:54,373
PAYNE: So after
two and a half weeks
89
00:06:54,457 --> 00:06:57,960
of living a civilian
puke's existence,
90
00:06:58,711 --> 00:07:00,630
I was back in uniform.
91
00:07:01,506 --> 00:07:03,299
Back in the Corps.
92
00:07:03,716 --> 00:07:07,178
Back to the sweet smell
of mustard gas
93
00:07:08,262 --> 00:07:09,806
and killing.
94
00:07:11,682 --> 00:07:14,310
Little did I know
what awaited for me.
95
00:07:15,269 --> 00:07:19,482
I've toured
11 separate engagements
from Iraq to Haiti,
96
00:07:20,316 --> 00:07:24,112
but nothing I did
would prepare me for
this newest assignment.
97
00:07:24,821 --> 00:07:27,907
I was told it would be
my greatest challenge.
98
00:07:28,658 --> 00:07:32,120
It was sure to be
a living hell.
99
00:07:53,349 --> 00:07:57,436
DR. PHILLIPS: (ON PA)
The glee club will be
meeting at 3:30.
100
00:07:57,520 --> 00:07:59,021
(BELL RINGING)
101
00:07:59,188 --> 00:08:01,023
(STUDENTS CHATTERING)
102
00:08:05,153 --> 00:08:11,200
Will the teachers
please report to the quad
for the science fair judging.
103
00:08:11,784 --> 00:08:15,371
EMILY: Tiger?
Tiger, come back here!
I'm not gonna chase you!
104
00:08:17,498 --> 00:08:18,708
(GROANS)
105
00:08:20,293 --> 00:08:21,669
(SNARLS)
106
00:08:25,506 --> 00:08:27,300
What you running from, boy?
107
00:08:27,383 --> 00:08:29,635
She's trying to give me a shot.
108
00:08:30,303 --> 00:08:32,221
You don't like needles?
109
00:08:33,306 --> 00:08:37,393
Want me to show you
a little trick to take
your mind off that pain?
110
00:08:37,894 --> 00:08:39,896
Here, give me your hand.
111
00:08:41,397 --> 00:08:44,233
Now you may feel
a little bit
of pressure.
112
00:08:44,984 --> 00:08:47,403
Hi, I'm Emily Walburn,
the school counselor.
113
00:08:47,486 --> 00:08:49,405
You must be Major Payne.
114
00:08:51,073 --> 00:08:53,618
That's a mighty fine
handshake you got there.
115
00:08:53,701 --> 00:08:54,660
(CHUCKLES)
116
00:08:54,744 --> 00:08:56,412
You wanna wrestle?
117
00:08:57,455 --> 00:08:59,165
No, thanks.
118
00:08:59,248 --> 00:09:01,000
I wrestle with
these kids all day.
119
00:09:01,083 --> 00:09:03,419
This one's usually
my big helper.
120
00:09:03,961 --> 00:09:05,171
Come on, Tiger.
121
00:09:05,254 --> 00:09:06,255
Nice meeting you, Major.
122
00:09:06,339 --> 00:09:08,591
Nice meeting you, Miss ma'am.
123
00:09:10,843 --> 00:09:11,886
Tiger!
124
00:09:12,511 --> 00:09:14,096
Tiger, come back here!
125
00:09:14,722 --> 00:09:16,599
I'm not gonna chase you.
126
00:09:20,061 --> 00:09:21,145
Mmm.
127
00:09:24,899 --> 00:09:26,067
(KNOCK AT DOOR)
128
00:09:26,150 --> 00:09:28,027
DR. PHILLIPS: Come in.
129
00:09:36,285 --> 00:09:38,788
Major Payne reporting
for duty, sir.
130
00:09:42,625 --> 00:09:43,793
What?
131
00:09:44,210 --> 00:09:47,088
Major Payne,
the new commandant.
132
00:09:48,005 --> 00:09:49,590
Oh, right.
133
00:09:50,007 --> 00:09:52,468
You're in charge
of the green boys.
134
00:09:53,636 --> 00:09:55,012
Come again?
135
00:09:55,554 --> 00:09:57,098
The green boys.
136
00:09:57,431 --> 00:09:59,809
They wear those green things.
137
00:10:00,601 --> 00:10:04,855
You know, it's funny.
When they stand in front
of bushes, I can't see them.
138
00:10:05,690 --> 00:10:07,108
(BUZZING STOPS)
139
00:10:07,191 --> 00:10:08,818
Why are you here?
140
00:10:09,944 --> 00:10:12,571
The ROTC program.
141
00:10:12,697 --> 00:10:14,407
I understand
you've been placing last
142
00:10:14,490 --> 00:10:17,118
eight years running
in the
Virginia Military Games.
143
00:10:17,201 --> 00:10:19,245
I am here to remedy that.
144
00:10:21,664 --> 00:10:24,625
We have an ROTC program?
145
00:10:25,543 --> 00:10:27,086
The green boys, sir.
146
00:10:27,169 --> 00:10:28,462
Oh, right.
147
00:10:28,546 --> 00:10:33,134
Between us, I don't care
what you do
with those boys,
148
00:10:33,342 --> 00:10:36,053
as long as you keep them
out of my hair.
149
00:10:36,762 --> 00:10:38,180
Is that all?
150
00:10:39,598 --> 00:10:42,310
Oh, would you like
a tour of the campus?
151
00:10:42,601 --> 00:10:44,770
No, I'd like to see my men.
152
00:10:45,563 --> 00:10:48,566
Fall in!
Move it, you idiots!
Let's go!
153
00:10:49,984 --> 00:10:53,446
Come on, Williams!
Let's move it.
Get a hop on it, boy!
154
00:10:53,988 --> 00:10:55,364
(SCREAMS)
155
00:10:57,199 --> 00:10:58,951
Fall in, everyone!
Fall in! Let's go!
156
00:10:59,035 --> 00:11:01,787
Come on, people!
Move!
157
00:11:01,871 --> 00:11:04,373
Hustle, hustle, hustle!
Let's go. Giddyup!
158
00:11:04,457 --> 00:11:07,376
Giddyup, giddyup,
giddyup, giddyup.
Let's go!
159
00:11:12,882 --> 00:11:15,051
Sir, the squad is formed, sir!
160
00:11:22,725 --> 00:11:23,976
Carry on.
161
00:11:30,066 --> 00:11:34,862
My name
is Major Benson
Winifred Payne.
162
00:11:35,821 --> 00:11:38,532
As of 0800,
163
00:11:38,908 --> 00:11:41,494
I am replacing Major Frankfurt
164
00:11:41,577 --> 00:11:44,288
as your commanding officer.
165
00:11:44,830 --> 00:11:46,415
(ALL BOOING)
166
00:11:47,875 --> 00:11:49,210
(GUNSHOTS)
167
00:11:52,380 --> 00:11:54,507
See now, what we have here
168
00:11:54,590 --> 00:11:57,927
is a failure to communicate.
169
00:12:01,806 --> 00:12:04,809
Do not attempt
170
00:12:04,892 --> 00:12:08,521
to challenge my authority.
171
00:12:08,813 --> 00:12:12,233
I have eight weeks
to turn you
gaggle of maggots
172
00:12:12,316 --> 00:12:15,069
into a well-disciplined
cadet unit.
173
00:12:15,611 --> 00:12:21,075
From this day forward,
your sorry asses
belong to me.
174
00:12:21,617 --> 00:12:25,913
You will not eat, sleep,
drink, blow your nose
175
00:12:25,996 --> 00:12:29,875
or even dig in your butts
without my say-so!
176
00:12:30,584 --> 00:12:31,919
Know this.
177
00:12:32,002 --> 00:12:35,214
Killing is my business, ladies,
178
00:12:35,297 --> 00:12:38,592
and business is good.
179
00:12:39,135 --> 00:12:40,261
Boo-hoo.
180
00:12:41,971 --> 00:12:43,097
What?
181
00:12:43,264 --> 00:12:45,391
I have to go to the bathroom.
182
00:12:45,599 --> 00:12:47,268
You hold it, turd.
183
00:12:47,560 --> 00:12:49,061
I can't!
184
00:12:50,521 --> 00:12:55,443
I said hold it, or I'll
break that off and kick it
around on the ground.
185
00:12:58,612 --> 00:13:00,990
Now be advised, ladies.
186
00:13:01,198 --> 00:13:04,994
We are going to win
the Virginia Military Games.
187
00:13:05,327 --> 00:13:07,037
(MOANING) I said win.
188
00:13:07,121 --> 00:13:09,915
Whiskey, Indian, November.
189
00:13:09,999 --> 00:13:12,251
Get used to the sound
of that word!
190
00:13:12,334 --> 00:13:13,961
Major Payne!
191
00:13:14,044 --> 00:13:16,797
What, boy?
What? What? What?
192
00:13:17,506 --> 00:13:19,175
I did something bad.
193
00:13:24,722 --> 00:13:27,766
You nasty little worm.
194
00:13:28,225 --> 00:13:32,271
(CRYING)
Go change your Huggies, boy,
and be back here pronto!
195
00:13:32,354 --> 00:13:33,981
Stop that crying.
196
00:13:34,190 --> 00:13:35,941
You'll get no pity from me.
197
00:13:36,025 --> 00:13:39,195
You think your tears
will stop Charlie
from taking his bayonet
198
00:13:39,278 --> 00:13:42,031
and sticking it
in your little
tiny heart?
199
00:13:44,158 --> 00:13:48,037
PAYNE: What the hell
was that, you little
freckle-faced cartoon?
200
00:13:51,415 --> 00:13:53,542
Did I give you
permission
to sneeze, Opie?
201
00:13:53,626 --> 00:13:54,668
No, sir.
202
00:13:54,752 --> 00:13:57,296
Then you hold it in,
you big-eared turd.
203
00:13:57,379 --> 00:14:00,216
Otherwise I'll
kick your ass
back to Mayberry.
204
00:14:02,635 --> 00:14:06,096
I see we have
a sickly boy
on our hands.
205
00:14:06,180 --> 00:14:08,891
Well, we're gonna
have to boost
your immune system, son.
206
00:14:08,974 --> 00:14:13,312
Drop down. Give me
25 pushups now.
207
00:14:13,562 --> 00:14:14,772
Count 'em out!
208
00:14:14,939 --> 00:14:16,106
One, sir.
209
00:14:16,232 --> 00:14:18,025
(SNICKERING) Two, sir.
210
00:14:20,194 --> 00:14:21,403
(SNORTS)
211
00:14:22,071 --> 00:14:23,614
(MIMICKING SNORT)
212
00:14:23,697 --> 00:14:26,200
What are you
laughing at, pig boy?
213
00:14:26,742 --> 00:14:28,994
You find a piece of candy
in your pocket?
214
00:14:29,078 --> 00:14:30,162
No, sir.
215
00:14:30,246 --> 00:14:31,705
What's your name, tubby?
216
00:14:32,081 --> 00:14:33,749
Heathcoat, sir.
217
00:14:33,832 --> 00:14:35,251
Heathcoat.
218
00:14:35,334 --> 00:14:37,795
You know, you remind
me of the Doughboy.
219
00:14:37,878 --> 00:14:39,713
If I poke your stomach,
will it make you go...
220
00:14:39,797 --> 00:14:41,215
(GIGGLES)
221
00:14:42,132 --> 00:14:44,802
You know what?
I'm gonna help you make room
for lunch, bacon boy.
222
00:14:44,885 --> 00:14:48,639
Drop down, give me
30 sit-ups right now!
Let's go!
223
00:14:49,139 --> 00:14:52,184
Count 'em out.
Let me see
that belly roll.
224
00:14:52,351 --> 00:14:55,020
(GROANING) One, tubby, tubby.
225
00:14:55,104 --> 00:14:57,314
One, sir.
Come on, pork chop.
226
00:14:57,815 --> 00:14:59,483
Two, chubby, chubby.
Two, sir.
227
00:14:59,567 --> 00:15:00,818
(WHOOPS)
228
00:15:00,901 --> 00:15:02,653
You is a pure genius.
229
00:15:02,736 --> 00:15:04,363
Who are you?
Redd Foxx?
230
00:15:04,446 --> 00:15:07,366
No, better yet,
you Richard Pryor,
ain't you?
231
00:15:08,742 --> 00:15:10,578
What's your name, girlfriend?
232
00:15:10,661 --> 00:15:13,956
Dwight Williams,
but my boys call me D.
So you can call me D.
233
00:15:14,039 --> 00:15:15,791
D, huh?
Yeah, brother.
234
00:15:17,001 --> 00:15:19,628
You like the way
I handle these
white boys, D?
235
00:15:19,712 --> 00:15:21,213
(CHUCKLING) Oh, yeah.
236
00:15:21,297 --> 00:15:24,133
It make you feel good
to see a black man
running things, huh?
237
00:15:24,216 --> 00:15:25,718
Malcolm X.
238
00:15:25,801 --> 00:15:27,428
Well, let me tell
you something, D.
239
00:15:27,553 --> 00:15:29,763
Yeah, brother?
Why don't
you come closer.
240
00:15:29,847 --> 00:15:33,225
I am not your damn brother!
241
00:15:33,309 --> 00:15:37,062
Now drop down
and give me 20
squat thrusts now!
242
00:15:39,940 --> 00:15:41,066
WILLIAMS: One, sir.
243
00:15:41,150 --> 00:15:43,402
What are you looking at,
ass eyes?
244
00:15:43,485 --> 00:15:44,987
Nothing, sir!
245
00:15:45,154 --> 00:15:46,530
You plotting on me, boy?
246
00:15:46,614 --> 00:15:47,698
No, sir!
247
00:15:47,781 --> 00:15:50,409
Well, let me
tell you something,
ass eyes.
248
00:15:50,492 --> 00:15:52,244
Let me tell you all something.
249
00:15:52,328 --> 00:15:55,080
War has made me very paranoid!
250
00:15:55,164 --> 00:15:57,166
And when a man gets
to eyeballing me,
251
00:15:57,249 --> 00:16:00,628
it makes my Agent Orange
act up, and I get
the urge to kill!
252
00:16:00,711 --> 00:16:01,754
Do you understand me?
253
00:16:01,837 --> 00:16:02,921
Sir, yes, sir!
254
00:16:03,005 --> 00:16:04,590
Do you all understand me?
255
00:16:04,673 --> 00:16:05,924
ALL: Sir, yes, sir!
256
00:16:06,008 --> 00:16:07,343
I can't hear you.
257
00:16:07,426 --> 00:16:08,927
ALL: Sir, yes, sir!
258
00:16:09,011 --> 00:16:11,764
And what is
your damage,
muscle head?
259
00:16:11,972 --> 00:16:15,434
You stupid,
you ignorant or you
just plain old deaf?
260
00:16:15,517 --> 00:16:18,562
Yes, sir.
Actually,
he is deaf.
261
00:16:19,104 --> 00:16:21,273
Oh. Well, thank you.
262
00:16:21,857 --> 00:16:26,487
Now drop down,
give me 25 more
for speaking out of line!
263
00:16:28,822 --> 00:16:30,491
WULIGER: One, sir.
264
00:16:30,908 --> 00:16:33,118
I'm sorry,
Mr. Handicapped Man.
265
00:16:33,202 --> 00:16:35,579
I didn't mean to offend you.
266
00:16:35,663 --> 00:16:37,289
Do you speak sign language?
267
00:16:37,373 --> 00:16:40,167
Can you read lips?
Let me break it down.
268
00:16:40,250 --> 00:16:44,588
If you don't answer me
when I speak to you,
269
00:16:44,880 --> 00:16:47,466
I'm gonna put my foot
in your ass!
270
00:16:47,549 --> 00:16:49,259
Is that clear, dummy?
271
00:16:49,343 --> 00:16:50,678
Sir, yes, sir.
272
00:16:50,886 --> 00:16:52,471
(STONE WHOOPING)
273
00:16:53,347 --> 00:16:55,307
Hold on, guys.
Wait up.
274
00:16:57,601 --> 00:16:58,727
Wait.
275
00:16:58,936 --> 00:17:01,063
Hey, guys!
Don't start
without me!
276
00:17:01,146 --> 00:17:03,023
Come on!
Wait! Hold on.
277
00:17:04,566 --> 00:17:05,776
Coming.
278
00:17:09,071 --> 00:17:12,366
Hello, gorgeous.
Welcome to my party.
279
00:17:12,950 --> 00:17:16,412
You know, you're
out of uniform there,
Mr. Fonzarelli.
280
00:17:16,704 --> 00:17:19,790
Yeah, well,
I like this look
better, General.
281
00:17:19,915 --> 00:17:21,500
Admiral. Whatever.
282
00:17:21,583 --> 00:17:24,211
It's Major, boy.
283
00:17:25,295 --> 00:17:30,300
Ooh. Looks like
we got another major
on our hands here, guys.
284
00:17:30,384 --> 00:17:33,470
ALL: Oh, major!
Oh, major!
285
00:17:40,936 --> 00:17:43,188
What's your name, girlie mouth?
286
00:17:45,065 --> 00:17:47,317
Cadet Alex Stone, sir!
287
00:17:47,401 --> 00:17:49,820
Yes, sir.
Hey, ho, sir.
288
00:17:54,491 --> 00:17:57,661
Well, I'm glad
to see you've got
a sense of humor.
289
00:17:58,287 --> 00:17:59,538
So do I.
290
00:17:59,621 --> 00:18:01,123
(CHUCKLES)
291
00:18:08,297 --> 00:18:12,551
From now on,
my little group
of scrotum sacs,
292
00:18:12,634 --> 00:18:15,471
you will strive to be like me.
293
00:18:15,596 --> 00:18:18,140
You will walk like me,
294
00:18:18,307 --> 00:18:20,350
talk like me,
295
00:18:20,434 --> 00:18:23,061
and until you win those Games,
296
00:18:23,145 --> 00:18:26,815
you will be bald like me.
297
00:18:28,150 --> 00:18:29,902
Way to go this time, Alex.
298
00:18:29,985 --> 00:18:32,738
Dotson, take these men
for two hours of PT!
299
00:18:32,821 --> 00:18:33,864
Yes, sir!
300
00:18:33,947 --> 00:18:36,658
First exercise
will be the
side-straddle hop!
301
00:18:36,742 --> 00:18:37,743
(ALL MOANING)
302
00:18:37,826 --> 00:18:40,287
Squad, ready.
Exercise!
303
00:18:40,370 --> 00:18:42,247
One, two, three.
304
00:18:42,331 --> 00:18:44,500
Come on, bacon boy!
Come on!
305
00:18:48,378 --> 00:18:50,297
DOTSON:
Command, one!
306
00:18:50,380 --> 00:18:52,841
STONE: Hey, Dotson,
why don't you just
sit down and shut up.
307
00:18:52,925 --> 00:18:54,051
I'm writing you up, buddy!
308
00:18:54,134 --> 00:18:55,928
That's it.
No more of this!
309
00:18:56,011 --> 00:18:58,222
Quit it, Dotson.
You're scaring me!
310
00:19:03,143 --> 00:19:04,978
Hello, Miss Walburn.
311
00:19:06,230 --> 00:19:09,983
Major Payne,
could you please
help me to understand
312
00:19:10,067 --> 00:19:12,402
why you shaved
the children bald?
313
00:19:13,320 --> 00:19:16,615
Oh, that's my little
incentive program.
314
00:19:16,698 --> 00:19:19,117
These boys have
to earn their due.
315
00:19:19,535 --> 00:19:21,453
Their hairdo, that is.
316
00:19:21,537 --> 00:19:22,871
(CHUCKLES)
317
00:19:25,165 --> 00:19:28,418
Do they have
to earn their bathroom
privileges, too?
318
00:19:34,049 --> 00:19:37,219
What do you want,
Mr. Pee-body?
319
00:19:37,594 --> 00:19:40,097
Well, he's upset
about this morning.
320
00:19:40,180 --> 00:19:42,724
Apparently, he had
a little accident.
321
00:19:43,392 --> 00:19:47,062
Apparently,
he pissed all over
the front of his pants.
322
00:19:47,521 --> 00:19:49,940
Well, maybe
that's because
he's six.
323
00:19:50,524 --> 00:19:51,608
Maybe 'cause he's six.
324
00:19:51,692 --> 00:19:55,028
Woman, when I was
six years old,
I had a fulltime job.
325
00:19:56,488 --> 00:20:00,993
Well, I told him that
you have something that
you'd like to say to him.
326
00:20:01,785 --> 00:20:03,412
(INAUDIBLE)
327
00:20:03,787 --> 00:20:05,163
(INAUDIBLE)
328
00:20:12,880 --> 00:20:15,090
You think I owe you an apology?
329
00:20:16,925 --> 00:20:22,139
Want me to take back
some of those mean and
hurtful little things I said?
330
00:20:24,600 --> 00:20:25,809
Okay.
331
00:20:26,226 --> 00:20:28,854
I'm sorry
you're just a little turd
332
00:20:28,937 --> 00:20:31,732
that can't hold
your liquid out in public.
333
00:20:31,815 --> 00:20:36,695
Now you get on out of my face
before I pick you up and
toss you out of that window.
334
00:20:36,778 --> 00:20:38,030
(GASPS)
335
00:20:43,243 --> 00:20:46,538
Major, have you ever done
this kind of work before?
336
00:20:47,915 --> 00:20:49,207
Woman,
337
00:20:49,625 --> 00:20:54,713
under this here hat,
I've trained 20,432
338
00:20:54,796 --> 00:20:57,007
combat killing machines.
339
00:20:58,133 --> 00:21:00,052
Well, that's just my point.
340
00:21:00,135 --> 00:21:02,220
You see,
now you're dealing
with children,
341
00:21:02,304 --> 00:21:04,640
and children
have special needs.
342
00:21:05,515 --> 00:21:08,477
Do you know what
positive
reinforcement means?
343
00:21:08,685 --> 00:21:12,189
Is that anything like
where you take a POW
and you snap his neck
344
00:21:12,272 --> 00:21:16,985
after you torture him
so he don't have to go through
life with a colostomy bag?
345
00:21:19,071 --> 00:21:20,322
Sort of.
346
00:21:22,366 --> 00:21:24,576
I'd like to make a suggestion.
347
00:21:26,078 --> 00:21:28,997
Why don't you and I
become partners
348
00:21:29,331 --> 00:21:33,085
in the emotional growth
and development of
these little ones?
349
00:21:34,544 --> 00:21:36,171
What do you say?
350
00:21:39,007 --> 00:21:42,219
Can you be my big helper
and help me do that?
351
00:21:45,263 --> 00:21:46,390
Yes.
352
00:21:48,308 --> 00:21:49,434
Good.
353
00:21:56,191 --> 00:21:58,610
Why do I feel like a jackass?
354
00:21:59,820 --> 00:22:01,613
(STUDENTS LAUGHING)
355
00:22:02,781 --> 00:22:05,367
BOY 1: (LAUGHING)
Look at that! Baldy!
356
00:22:07,786 --> 00:22:10,998
BOY 2: Hey,
your head's shaped
like a bowling ball!
357
00:22:16,420 --> 00:22:18,547
Nazi fascist pig!
358
00:22:19,214 --> 00:22:21,508
I know where
I'm gonna shave him.
359
00:22:21,591 --> 00:22:22,968
Damn Major Payne.
360
00:22:23,051 --> 00:22:25,220
WILLIAMS: I didn't want
you to be my damn brother
in the first place.
361
00:22:25,303 --> 00:22:27,556
WULIGER: Most of the body
heat travels through
the head, you know.
362
00:22:27,639 --> 00:22:29,558
It means I'm gonna be
colder, and I get sick.
363
00:22:29,766 --> 00:22:31,935
And if I'm sick,
I'm gonna start
throwing up...
364
00:22:32,019 --> 00:22:35,188
WILLIAMS: Man, that damn
Payne's already starting
to get on my nerves.
365
00:22:35,272 --> 00:22:38,025
Turd this, turd that.
Who does he think he is?
366
00:22:38,859 --> 00:22:40,318
Just shut up.
367
00:22:41,903 --> 00:22:42,988
You telling me to shut up?
368
00:22:43,071 --> 00:22:44,489
Why don't you
shut your damn mouth
369
00:22:44,573 --> 00:22:47,159
and stop eating
all that damn candy,
you fat pig.
370
00:22:50,537 --> 00:22:53,248
I look like Curly
from The Three Stooges.
371
00:22:55,042 --> 00:22:57,377
Did I say you could
touch my bed?
372
00:22:58,045 --> 00:22:59,046
No.
373
00:22:59,421 --> 00:23:01,048
Then get off.
374
00:23:01,131 --> 00:23:02,549
Ow!
375
00:23:04,092 --> 00:23:05,719
Payne's gonna kill us.
376
00:23:05,802 --> 00:23:08,013
You know I have
a heart condition.
377
00:23:08,096 --> 00:23:11,183
I'm not sure he's familiar
with my medical history.
378
00:23:11,266 --> 00:23:12,976
Let's go, let's go,
let's go! Come on!
379
00:23:13,060 --> 00:23:16,229
Move it! Saddle up
that horsey and ride!
380
00:23:16,438 --> 00:23:18,857
You ever hear of
knocking, Dotson?
381
00:23:19,566 --> 00:23:21,526
You won't have to worry
about that anymore.
382
00:23:21,610 --> 00:23:23,612
I have good news
for you assholes.
383
00:23:23,695 --> 00:23:27,157
Pack your bedding, your kit
and your clothes! Let's go!
384
00:23:27,574 --> 00:23:28,825
Where to?
385
00:23:31,036 --> 00:23:36,041
Hello, cue balls.
Welcome to
the House of Payne.
386
00:23:36,124 --> 00:23:37,292
(THUNDERING)
387
00:23:37,375 --> 00:23:38,627
You gotta be joking.
388
00:23:38,710 --> 00:23:42,714
A squad that
lives together,
wins together.
389
00:23:43,215 --> 00:23:44,841
Unity, turds.
390
00:23:44,925 --> 00:23:49,179
That is the key word
in "unit" without the Y.
391
00:23:50,180 --> 00:23:54,935
Tiger, Leland,
you will reside at
the ROTC building.
392
00:23:55,811 --> 00:24:00,524
The rest of you garbage,
grab a rack and settle in.
393
00:24:01,149 --> 00:24:02,692
Let's move out.
394
00:24:03,985 --> 00:24:06,238
You eyeball me again,
I'll snatch it out
395
00:24:06,321 --> 00:24:08,824
and put it
in Heathcoat's
cookie bag.
396
00:24:09,241 --> 00:24:11,993
It's so damp.
What about
my allergies?
397
00:24:12,077 --> 00:24:13,745
You know how far
we are
from the kitchen?
398
00:24:13,829 --> 00:24:15,789
TIGER: Why can't I stay here
with the rest of these guys?
Shut up.
399
00:24:15,872 --> 00:24:17,332
PAYNE:
'Cause I said so, turd.
400
00:24:17,415 --> 00:24:19,042
Major Payne, sir.
401
00:24:19,960 --> 00:24:21,044
What?
402
00:24:22,087 --> 00:24:26,675
Sir, I think I speak for
everyone when I say that
this place is unacceptable,
403
00:24:27,175 --> 00:24:28,176
sir.
404
00:24:28,301 --> 00:24:29,845
(ALL MUTTERING)
405
00:24:31,721 --> 00:24:33,014
Really?
406
00:24:33,723 --> 00:24:36,685
PAYNE: (SINGING)
Love my barracks
night and day
407
00:24:36,768 --> 00:24:39,229
ALL: (SINGING)
Love my barracks
night and day
408
00:24:39,312 --> 00:24:42,107
Won't complain
That's where I'll stay
409
00:24:42,190 --> 00:24:44,776
Won't complain
That's where I'll stay
410
00:24:47,404 --> 00:24:49,114
Good plan this time, Alex.
411
00:24:49,197 --> 00:24:50,282
Why don't you shut up?
412
00:24:50,365 --> 00:24:53,201
All right,
my little patch of
Brussels sprouts.
413
00:24:53,285 --> 00:24:56,830
Uproot yourselves,
climb out the pool
and get some rest.
414
00:24:57,122 --> 00:24:58,915
You're gonna need it.
415
00:24:59,541 --> 00:25:04,212
Tomorrow, ladies,
we gonna start
the hard stuff.
416
00:25:05,380 --> 00:25:06,882
The hard stuff?
417
00:25:09,050 --> 00:25:11,469
PAYNE: Let's move it,
you turds!
418
00:25:11,553 --> 00:25:13,805
You'll get no sympathy from me!
419
00:25:13,889 --> 00:25:16,099
You want sympathy,
look in the dictionary
420
00:25:16,183 --> 00:25:18,393
between "shit"
and "syphilis!"
421
00:25:18,476 --> 00:25:20,687
That's where
you'll find
my sympathy!
422
00:25:20,770 --> 00:25:22,397
This ain't no walk in the park!
423
00:25:22,480 --> 00:25:24,774
Let's move it!
Hustle, hustle!
424
00:25:25,400 --> 00:25:26,484
Hey, Dumbo!
425
00:25:26,568 --> 00:25:30,238
You should be able
to fly through those tubes
with them big-ass ears, boy!
426
00:25:30,322 --> 00:25:32,616
Yeah, Dumbo!
Fly, baby, fly!
427
00:25:33,158 --> 00:25:34,659
Hey, Williams!
428
00:25:34,743 --> 00:25:37,495
You tell Marlee Matlin's son,
429
00:25:37,579 --> 00:25:40,498
if he don't get
across that rope,
I'm gonna hang him with it!
430
00:25:40,582 --> 00:25:41,625
He'll hang you with it!
431
00:25:41,708 --> 00:25:42,792
(LAUGHS)
432
00:25:42,876 --> 00:25:44,211
Heathcoat!
433
00:25:45,337 --> 00:25:48,590
You get your fat body
over that wall!
434
00:25:48,673 --> 00:25:50,592
Take your
fat pork chop body
over that...
435
00:25:50,675 --> 00:25:52,093
You shut up.
436
00:25:52,594 --> 00:25:58,016
Nobody's leaving here until
the average for this squad
is one minute, 20 seconds!
437
00:25:58,266 --> 00:26:00,393
Come on, he can't do it.
438
00:26:00,477 --> 00:26:03,772
Leave him alone.
I can barely do it.
439
00:26:04,105 --> 00:26:05,982
It's slippery out here.
440
00:26:06,107 --> 00:26:07,901
Slippery, he say.
441
00:26:07,984 --> 00:26:10,862
You think Charlie care
anything about slippery?
442
00:26:10,946 --> 00:26:13,615
Only thing he knows
is slit your throat.
443
00:26:13,698 --> 00:26:15,909
What if this was
a life-or-death
situation?
444
00:26:15,992 --> 00:26:18,620
But it's not
a life-or-death
situation.
445
00:26:19,955 --> 00:26:21,206
It is now.
446
00:26:21,289 --> 00:26:22,332
(ALL SCREAMING)
447
00:26:22,415 --> 00:26:24,000
One Mississippi.
448
00:26:24,626 --> 00:26:26,127
Two Mississippi.
449
00:26:26,336 --> 00:26:28,922
STONE: Come on, guys!
What are you, crazy?
450
00:26:29,005 --> 00:26:31,341
It's just a dummy grenade.
451
00:26:36,513 --> 00:26:37,639
Damn!
452
00:26:43,395 --> 00:26:45,146
Who's the dummy now?
453
00:26:48,525 --> 00:26:50,151
STONE:
So what is it, exactly?
454
00:26:50,235 --> 00:26:51,528
Concentrated dithiazanine.
455
00:26:51,611 --> 00:26:52,946
What the hell is that?
456
00:26:53,029 --> 00:26:54,698
It's like a super laxative.
457
00:26:54,781 --> 00:26:58,618
This here will pack
enough punch to take out
an entire football team.
458
00:26:58,702 --> 00:27:00,829
Payne will never
get off the can.
459
00:27:00,912 --> 00:27:04,291
He'll be making
beef stool
till graduation.
460
00:27:04,374 --> 00:27:05,625
HEATHCOAT: Yeah.
Nice.
461
00:27:05,709 --> 00:27:08,086
Payne will never know
what hit him.
462
00:27:15,010 --> 00:27:16,219
(EXCLAIMS)
463
00:27:32,569 --> 00:27:34,195
Major Payne, sir?
464
00:27:35,739 --> 00:27:37,991
You see I'm eating, turd?
465
00:27:38,867 --> 00:27:40,994
There's a call for you, sir.
466
00:28:19,574 --> 00:28:21,576
He's coming!
He's coming!
467
00:29:02,951 --> 00:29:04,327
(EXCLAIMING)
468
00:29:15,422 --> 00:29:17,048
(STOMACH GURGLES)
469
00:29:21,010 --> 00:29:22,512
(GURGLES)
470
00:29:36,734 --> 00:29:37,819
Hmm.
471
00:29:52,333 --> 00:29:53,585
(FARTS)
472
00:30:01,384 --> 00:30:02,594
PAYNE:
Ready on the right!
473
00:30:02,677 --> 00:30:04,478
WILLIAMS: Damn, G.
He nearly
put you in a coma.
474
00:30:04,512 --> 00:30:05,555
Ready on the left!
475
00:30:05,638 --> 00:30:06,848
It can't be legal the way
he's been treating us.
476
00:30:06,931 --> 00:30:08,099
Ready on the firing range!
477
00:30:08,183 --> 00:30:10,103
Turds, commence firing!
Let's just tell Phillips.
478
00:30:10,143 --> 00:30:13,354
(GUNSHOTS)
No, no. That senile old fool
ain't gonna help us.
479
00:30:13,438 --> 00:30:15,815
What the hell is that?
What kind of shooting
is that?
480
00:30:15,899 --> 00:30:17,734
Hey! Hey, dummy!
481
00:30:17,817 --> 00:30:20,445
What's the matter?
You can't
see, either?
482
00:30:20,528 --> 00:30:21,988
We gotta get rid of
that son of a bitch.
483
00:30:22,071 --> 00:30:24,199
PAYNE: You gaggle
of maggots couldn't hit
a bull in the ass
484
00:30:24,282 --> 00:30:25,533
with a baseball bat!
485
00:30:25,617 --> 00:30:30,079
Listen, we're gonna have
to prove that Payne
did something so vile,
486
00:30:31,122 --> 00:30:32,540
so perverse,
487
00:30:34,042 --> 00:30:35,793
so disgusting
488
00:30:38,004 --> 00:30:41,174
that Phillips
will have no choice
but to fire him.
489
00:30:46,221 --> 00:30:47,555
Like what?
490
00:30:51,893 --> 00:30:53,061
Why me?
491
00:30:53,228 --> 00:30:55,563
Because you have
got the biggest tits.
492
00:30:55,855 --> 00:30:57,482
(ALL GUFFAWING)
493
00:30:57,565 --> 00:30:58,900
(SHUSHING)
494
00:31:02,820 --> 00:31:04,197
Why not Wuliger?
495
00:31:04,280 --> 00:31:06,324
'Cause Wuliger's
gotta take
the pictures.
496
00:31:09,494 --> 00:31:11,412
(SNORING)
497
00:31:23,132 --> 00:31:25,969
Look, it's been
four hours.
He hasn't blinked.
498
00:31:26,052 --> 00:31:28,179
I'm telling you, these
Special Forces guys
499
00:31:28,263 --> 00:31:30,473
can sleep with their eyes open.
500
00:31:30,765 --> 00:31:32,016
Trust me.
501
00:31:34,644 --> 00:31:36,896
What happened
to the other dress?
502
00:31:36,980 --> 00:31:38,606
This one's prettier.
503
00:31:38,773 --> 00:31:40,400
(SNICKERS) Shut up, Bryan!
504
00:31:40,483 --> 00:31:41,943
Shh! Come on.
505
00:31:42,485 --> 00:31:43,945
Williams, go.
506
00:31:49,200 --> 00:31:52,745
WILLIAMS: Man,
you sure about this?
He looks awake to me.
507
00:31:53,788 --> 00:31:55,623
No, I checked on that.
508
00:31:57,292 --> 00:31:58,418
STONE: Watch this.
509
00:31:58,501 --> 00:32:01,212
Yo, turd sniffer.
Maggot face.
510
00:32:01,462 --> 00:32:03,590
See? He's dead
to the world.
511
00:32:04,173 --> 00:32:05,341
Let's go.
512
00:32:13,766 --> 00:32:14,851
(SOFTLY) Get in.
513
00:32:14,934 --> 00:32:17,228
Can't I just stand
beside the bed?
514
00:32:17,312 --> 00:32:18,646
Get in.
515
00:32:23,985 --> 00:32:25,486
STONE: Get in.
516
00:32:30,908 --> 00:32:33,369
All right,
now put your head
on his shoulder.
517
00:32:33,453 --> 00:32:34,912
Are you crazy?
518
00:32:34,996 --> 00:32:36,164
Do it.
519
00:32:39,500 --> 00:32:40,668
Closer.
520
00:32:43,463 --> 00:32:44,547
Closer.
521
00:32:46,716 --> 00:32:49,344
Now put your arm around him.
522
00:32:52,430 --> 00:32:54,098
Good. Now hold it.
523
00:32:54,223 --> 00:32:56,517
Hold it. Okay.
524
00:33:05,485 --> 00:33:07,028
Hello, Betty.
525
00:33:07,111 --> 00:33:08,404
(SCREAMING)
526
00:33:08,488 --> 00:33:10,365
(ALL SCREAMING)
527
00:33:17,622 --> 00:33:20,416
PAYNE: (SINGING)
Got no worry
Got no stress
528
00:33:20,500 --> 00:33:23,169
CADETS: (SINGING)
Got no worry
Got no stress
529
00:33:23,252 --> 00:33:26,172
'Cause we feel good
in our dress
530
00:33:26,255 --> 00:33:29,175
'Cause we feel good
in our dress
531
00:33:29,258 --> 00:33:32,011
Major Payne's a major dis
532
00:33:32,095 --> 00:33:34,889
Major Payne's a major dis
533
00:33:34,972 --> 00:33:37,642
Makes us squat when we piss
534
00:33:37,725 --> 00:33:40,645
He makes us squat when we piss
535
00:33:40,728 --> 00:33:43,439
Got no worries Got no care
536
00:33:43,564 --> 00:33:46,109
(LAUGHING)
Got no worries
Got no care
537
00:33:46,192 --> 00:33:48,820
I'm a bald-headed
son of a bitch
without hair
538
00:33:48,903 --> 00:33:52,031
I'm a bald-headed
son of a bitch
without hair
539
00:33:52,115 --> 00:33:54,826
Used to be Samson Now I'm Ann
540
00:33:54,909 --> 00:33:57,370
Used to be Samson Now I'm Ann
541
00:33:57,453 --> 00:33:59,997
Gotta earn my right
to be called a man
542
00:34:00,081 --> 00:34:03,000
Gotta earn my right
to be called a man
543
00:34:03,084 --> 00:34:07,839
I'll tell you, ladies,
you're the purtiest unit
ever underneath my command!
544
00:34:08,339 --> 00:34:11,217
Maybe I'll have
to change my name
to Pimp Daddy Payne!
545
00:34:11,300 --> 00:34:12,343
(STUDENTS LAUGHING)
546
00:34:12,427 --> 00:34:13,553
(CHUCKLING)
547
00:34:13,636 --> 00:34:15,096
EMILY: Major!
548
00:34:17,515 --> 00:34:19,851
What are the boys doing
in those dresses?
549
00:34:19,934 --> 00:34:22,145
They putting on a fashion show.
550
00:34:28,025 --> 00:34:32,447
I thought we had a little
talk about this kind of
negative reinforcement.
551
00:34:32,905 --> 00:34:35,491
Weren't you going
to be my big helper?
552
00:34:36,701 --> 00:34:38,745
Yeah, but they started it.
553
00:34:38,911 --> 00:34:40,580
Well, I'm stopping it.
554
00:34:40,788 --> 00:34:42,457
Don't touch my whistle.
555
00:34:42,540 --> 00:34:44,167
But I was just gonna...
556
00:34:44,250 --> 00:34:46,252
Don't touch the whistle.
557
00:34:49,589 --> 00:34:51,466
All right, ladies!
558
00:34:51,549 --> 00:34:53,801
Take off those dresses.
Head to your barracks.
559
00:34:53,885 --> 00:34:55,136
Fold 'em up neatly.
560
00:34:55,219 --> 00:34:56,471
Let's move it.
561
00:34:58,681 --> 00:34:59,807
BOY: You should
shave your legs more.
562
00:34:59,891 --> 00:35:00,975
Shut up!
563
00:35:01,809 --> 00:35:03,644
Good day, Miss Walburn.
564
00:35:05,772 --> 00:35:07,315
Do you really think
that this approach
565
00:35:07,398 --> 00:35:10,485
is the best way
to gain the trust
of these boys?
566
00:35:10,651 --> 00:35:13,488
They may not like me,
but they
will respect me.
567
00:35:13,571 --> 00:35:15,448
Let me be more direct.
568
00:35:16,157 --> 00:35:17,241
They hate you.
569
00:35:17,325 --> 00:35:20,661
Good. It'll draw them
close together,
make 'em a team.
570
00:35:21,996 --> 00:35:23,706
That's a very cynical plan.
571
00:35:23,790 --> 00:35:26,167
Yeah, but it won't backfire.
572
00:35:26,793 --> 00:35:27,877
Here.
573
00:35:27,960 --> 00:35:31,255
I would like you to
consider
an alternative approach.
574
00:35:31,672 --> 00:35:33,800
I want you to have this book.
575
00:35:33,925 --> 00:35:36,219
Read it.
Apply it.
576
00:35:38,304 --> 00:35:42,099
The ABC's of the Loving
Male Role Model.
577
00:35:42,183 --> 00:35:43,851
I don't need your book.
578
00:35:43,935 --> 00:35:45,478
Take it.
I don't want it.
579
00:35:45,561 --> 00:35:47,522
Take it.
I don't want it.
580
00:35:47,605 --> 00:35:49,106
Please, Major?
581
00:35:55,780 --> 00:35:56,864
Okay.
582
00:36:04,747 --> 00:36:05,998
(GROANS)
583
00:36:07,500 --> 00:36:09,418
(STUDENTS LAUGHING)
584
00:36:10,378 --> 00:36:11,587
Shut up.
585
00:36:12,755 --> 00:36:14,465
All right, I got
a sure-fire plan
586
00:36:14,549 --> 00:36:15,967
to get rid of
that son of a bitch.
587
00:36:16,050 --> 00:36:17,677
What is it?
What? What?
588
00:36:17,760 --> 00:36:19,512
It's gonna cost us.
589
00:36:19,887 --> 00:36:21,305
How much you got?
20.
590
00:36:21,389 --> 00:36:22,473
I got 25.
591
00:36:22,557 --> 00:36:24,016
Put me down for 40.
592
00:36:24,141 --> 00:36:26,060
All right, Dotson!
Yeah!
593
00:36:26,227 --> 00:36:27,436
(ALL CLAMORING)
594
00:36:27,520 --> 00:36:29,105
Okay. All right.
All right.
595
00:36:29,188 --> 00:36:30,565
We're taking out
Payne tomorrow!
596
00:36:30,648 --> 00:36:31,983
ALL: Yeah!
597
00:36:35,903 --> 00:36:38,239
"Love is the key"
598
00:36:38,322 --> 00:36:40,074
"to understanding."
599
00:36:55,006 --> 00:36:56,591
"The Three Bees."
600
00:36:57,592 --> 00:36:59,427
"Bee a good listener."
601
00:37:00,011 --> 00:37:02,430
"Bee sensitive
to their needs."
602
00:37:04,849 --> 00:37:06,809
Oh, hello, Miss Walburn.
603
00:37:07,810 --> 00:37:09,061
I just came by to let you know
604
00:37:09,145 --> 00:37:11,314
that Wuliger has
a slight temperature,
605
00:37:11,397 --> 00:37:14,567
so you might not
want to torture him
this evening.
606
00:37:16,986 --> 00:37:19,780
I will be sensitive
607
00:37:20,323 --> 00:37:21,782
to his needs.
608
00:37:23,784 --> 00:37:25,995
Have you been reading the book?
609
00:37:26,787 --> 00:37:29,790
Well, I might have
glanced at it
once or twice.
610
00:37:30,082 --> 00:37:33,085
Oh, well, that's very good!
I'm very proud of you, Major.
611
00:37:33,252 --> 00:37:34,295
(GASPS) Oh, shucks.
612
00:37:34,378 --> 00:37:36,589
It ain't hard being sensitive.
613
00:37:36,839 --> 00:37:38,716
He's back! He's back!
614
00:37:38,799 --> 00:37:40,051
Who's back?
615
00:37:40,134 --> 00:37:42,386
The man who lives in my closet.
616
00:37:42,553 --> 00:37:43,888
Oh, boy, get on out of here
617
00:37:43,971 --> 00:37:47,516
with that "I'm scared
of the dark" crap.
Go on, now. Get!
618
00:37:48,059 --> 00:37:49,393
Sensitive.
619
00:37:55,149 --> 00:37:58,361
Sensitive. Sensitive.
620
00:38:00,738 --> 00:38:04,951
Hello, there, fella.
You know,
what you're having,
621
00:38:05,284 --> 00:38:07,244
it's called a nightmare.
622
00:38:07,328 --> 00:38:09,664
Do you know
what a nightmare is?
623
00:38:10,456 --> 00:38:12,416
Well, that's all this is.
624
00:38:13,668 --> 00:38:15,962
Why don't you run on
back to your room
625
00:38:16,045 --> 00:38:19,090
before that man jump
out the closet and chop
your little head off.
626
00:38:19,173 --> 00:38:20,216
(GASPS)
627
00:38:20,299 --> 00:38:21,509
(CRYING)
628
00:38:24,845 --> 00:38:26,722
Sensitive.
629
00:38:28,099 --> 00:38:30,393
You call that being sensitive?
630
00:38:31,143 --> 00:38:33,938
Let me give you
a little history
on Kevin Dunne.
631
00:38:34,021 --> 00:38:36,399
Both of his parents are dead.
632
00:38:36,482 --> 00:38:39,068
Car accident, 1989.
633
00:38:39,151 --> 00:38:41,946
Lived in
the Chelsea Orphanage
till 1991
634
00:38:42,029 --> 00:38:43,364
when the school adopted him.
635
00:38:43,447 --> 00:38:45,366
I know all about it.
636
00:38:45,449 --> 00:38:49,412
Well, then you should also
know that the last thing
he needs right now
637
00:38:49,495 --> 00:38:53,165
is a sadistic father figure
scaring the life out of him.
638
00:38:54,875 --> 00:38:59,422
Maybe what he need
is for you to pop
your titty out his mouth
639
00:38:59,505 --> 00:39:01,465
and let the boy grow up.
640
00:39:03,217 --> 00:39:06,345
Excuse me?
What did you say?
641
00:39:06,429 --> 00:39:08,472
I didn't stutter.
642
00:39:08,889 --> 00:39:14,145
I said
pop your titty
out his mouth
643
00:39:14,228 --> 00:39:17,148
and stop babying him!
644
00:39:17,231 --> 00:39:20,735
I don't call it babying.
I call it nurturing.
645
00:39:21,235 --> 00:39:24,071
And I call it neutering.
646
00:39:24,739 --> 00:39:27,199
And I call you an insecure,
647
00:39:27,283 --> 00:39:29,994
overbearing, psychopathic,
dictatorial, egomaniacal,
648
00:39:30,077 --> 00:39:32,079
frigid lunatic asshole!
649
00:39:34,331 --> 00:39:35,875
I ain't frigid.
650
00:39:37,043 --> 00:39:38,669
He's still there!
651
00:39:41,797 --> 00:39:43,758
You wanna see nurturing?
652
00:39:56,645 --> 00:39:58,147
He's in there?
653
00:40:01,901 --> 00:40:03,152
(GASPING)
654
00:40:05,237 --> 00:40:07,698
If he's still in there,
he ain't happy.
655
00:40:07,782 --> 00:40:09,158
What was that?
656
00:40:09,241 --> 00:40:14,080
Major Payne just
terminated that bad man
with extreme prejudice!
657
00:40:14,997 --> 00:40:17,792
And if he's
still in there,
he ain't happy!
658
00:40:21,462 --> 00:40:23,547
You run on back to bed.
659
00:40:23,672 --> 00:40:26,592
That bad man ain't
gonna bother you no more.
660
00:40:27,051 --> 00:40:28,844
Thank you, Major.
661
00:40:29,845 --> 00:40:31,472
I love you.
662
00:40:40,773 --> 00:40:43,651
What's your angle, boy?
You plotting on me?
663
00:40:43,734 --> 00:40:44,735
No, sir!
664
00:40:44,819 --> 00:40:47,071
Don't you know
I could snap your neck
in 20 different places?
665
00:40:47,154 --> 00:40:49,073
Major, Major!
It's okay!
666
00:40:49,198 --> 00:40:52,034
He's just trying
to show you
some affection!
667
00:40:55,329 --> 00:40:56,914
I don't like it.
668
00:40:57,957 --> 00:41:00,376
Make me feel all funny.
669
00:41:11,053 --> 00:41:12,429
(BOTH GASP)
670
00:41:12,763 --> 00:41:15,015
Good night, Miss Walburn.
671
00:41:15,099 --> 00:41:16,767
Good night, Major.
672
00:41:29,405 --> 00:41:30,447
Where is he?
673
00:41:30,531 --> 00:41:32,241
He better get here.
674
00:41:32,992 --> 00:41:35,452
CADETS: Alex! Alex!
675
00:41:36,203 --> 00:41:37,371
(HONKS)
676
00:41:42,209 --> 00:41:43,502
WULIGER:
Alex, did you do it?
677
00:41:43,586 --> 00:41:45,212
How much did it cost?
678
00:41:45,296 --> 00:41:46,505
Where were you?
You really did it?
679
00:41:46,589 --> 00:41:47,840
I did it. I did it.
Sure.
680
00:41:47,923 --> 00:41:51,427
Squad! Atten-hut.
681
00:41:54,388 --> 00:41:56,807
Let's go, maggots.
Follow my lead!
682
00:41:56,974 --> 00:41:59,351
(SINGING)
Payne's not here
He's in our ass
683
00:41:59,435 --> 00:42:01,770
(SINGING)
Payne's not here
He's in our ass
684
00:42:01,854 --> 00:42:03,981
Butt's so tight
He can't pass gas
685
00:42:04,064 --> 00:42:06,150
Butt's so tight
He can't pass gas
686
00:42:06,233 --> 00:42:07,359
Sound off
687
00:42:07,443 --> 00:42:08,485
One, two
688
00:42:08,569 --> 00:42:10,487
Sound off Three, four
689
00:42:10,571 --> 00:42:12,156
Break it on down
690
00:42:12,990 --> 00:42:14,575
Break it on down
691
00:42:15,075 --> 00:42:16,368
Break it on down
692
00:42:16,452 --> 00:42:18,204
(WILLIAMS LAUGHING)
693
00:42:21,207 --> 00:42:22,917
Break it on down...
694
00:42:25,586 --> 00:42:27,504
You like to rhyme, boy?
695
00:42:29,256 --> 00:42:32,092
What's your name?
Bushwick Bill?
696
00:42:32,176 --> 00:42:35,095
No, let me guess.
You Snoop Diggety Dogg.
697
00:42:36,013 --> 00:42:39,516
Turds, front leaning
rest position. Move!
698
00:42:39,600 --> 00:42:43,187
I'm going to teach you
how I rhyme
military style!
699
00:42:45,439 --> 00:42:46,440
One.
700
00:42:47,441 --> 00:42:49,235
Don't you feel dumb?
701
00:42:49,944 --> 00:42:51,111
Two.
702
00:42:51,946 --> 00:42:53,781
Look at you.
703
00:42:54,406 --> 00:42:56,075
Three.
704
00:42:56,158 --> 00:42:59,495
Don't you ever make
no jokes about me
behind my back.
705
00:42:59,578 --> 00:43:02,414
Otherwise
I stomp you
in the ground!
706
00:43:02,748 --> 00:43:04,708
(MOTORCYCLE APPROACHING)
707
00:43:21,976 --> 00:43:23,769
All right, ladies...
708
00:43:25,521 --> 00:43:28,565
Hey, Dunne.
You missed
all the fun.
709
00:43:28,691 --> 00:43:30,985
(CHUCKLES)
That's another rhyme.
710
00:43:32,361 --> 00:43:34,613
PAYNE:
All right, we're heading
down to the field...
711
00:43:34,697 --> 00:43:35,739
There he is.
712
00:43:35,823 --> 00:43:37,700
For two hours of weapons drill.
713
00:43:37,783 --> 00:43:39,535
Yo, Payne!
714
00:43:44,832 --> 00:43:46,292
You Payne?
715
00:43:47,001 --> 00:43:49,211
I got something to say to you.
716
00:43:50,838 --> 00:43:52,798
Fee, fie, foe, fum.
717
00:43:53,007 --> 00:43:55,426
What beanstalk you fall from?
718
00:44:09,356 --> 00:44:12,609
You know, I heard
you've been giving
these boys a hard time.
719
00:44:12,693 --> 00:44:17,406
In fact,
I heard you couldn't cut it
in a real man's military!
720
00:44:18,032 --> 00:44:20,743
I heard that it's time
for you to leave.
721
00:44:21,285 --> 00:44:22,578
Yeah.
722
00:44:23,704 --> 00:44:25,372
Know what I heard?
723
00:44:25,456 --> 00:44:29,418
I heard your mother
was so fat, she played
pool with the planets.
724
00:44:33,130 --> 00:44:34,214
Yes!
725
00:44:36,592 --> 00:44:38,844
You thinking about leaving yet?
726
00:44:41,347 --> 00:44:45,559
Well, actually, I think
the party just begun.
727
00:44:45,684 --> 00:44:47,186
(CHUCKLING)
728
00:44:49,480 --> 00:44:53,150
Now, what I'm gonna do
is take this right foot
729
00:44:53,233 --> 00:44:55,353
and I'm gonna put it
across the left side
of your face.
730
00:44:55,361 --> 00:44:58,238
Don't give me
that Billy Jack
bullshit!
731
00:44:58,405 --> 00:44:59,615
(GRUNTS)
732
00:45:04,578 --> 00:45:05,913
(GROANING)
733
00:45:06,372 --> 00:45:10,751
(GASPING)
You said you were gonna
hit me in the face.
734
00:45:11,251 --> 00:45:13,087
What, you calling me a liar?
735
00:45:15,964 --> 00:45:17,591
Ooh!
736
00:45:22,429 --> 00:45:24,848
Oh, children.
737
00:45:26,100 --> 00:45:29,812
Somebody's gonna answer
for this blood
from my lip.
738
00:45:31,021 --> 00:45:32,481
I want names.
739
00:45:33,273 --> 00:45:35,651
I wanna know who's responsible.
740
00:45:38,737 --> 00:45:41,073
Don't all run at once.
741
00:45:42,324 --> 00:45:44,952
I guess nobody's responsible.
742
00:45:45,244 --> 00:45:48,831
Guess I just had
that one coming.
743
00:45:50,124 --> 00:45:52,668
Well, you know
what y'all got coming?
744
00:45:53,627 --> 00:45:59,133
Seven 23-hour days
full of fun and adventure.
745
00:46:00,342 --> 00:46:03,887
I'm gonna make you boys strong.
746
00:46:04,972 --> 00:46:06,014
Sir.
747
00:46:07,516 --> 00:46:08,851
Yes, turd?
748
00:46:10,727 --> 00:46:12,813
It was me, sir.
I hired him.
749
00:46:12,938 --> 00:46:15,524
Well, that's one
death warrant signed.
750
00:46:16,233 --> 00:46:18,902
Do I have any more volunteers?
751
00:46:19,987 --> 00:46:22,656
What about you, brown nose?
752
00:46:23,240 --> 00:46:24,992
I acted alone, sir.
753
00:46:25,367 --> 00:46:28,662
The rest of the squad
was unaware
of my activities.
754
00:46:31,331 --> 00:46:34,168
That's a pretty bold
move there, Mr. Stone.
755
00:46:36,211 --> 00:46:38,964
What do you think
I ought to do with you?
756
00:46:39,756 --> 00:46:41,425
I don't know, sir.
757
00:46:43,260 --> 00:46:44,887
You don't know.
758
00:46:45,888 --> 00:46:48,682
I guess you should
probably expel me, sir.
759
00:46:49,516 --> 00:46:52,478
What, and send you
on a vacation?
760
00:46:53,854 --> 00:46:54,980
Dotson.
761
00:46:55,063 --> 00:46:56,106
Sir, yes, sir!
762
00:46:56,190 --> 00:46:58,692
You are no longer
the squad leader.
763
00:46:59,860 --> 00:47:03,822
Stone, you are now
cadet sergeant.
764
00:47:04,948 --> 00:47:07,993
If these men win the
Virginia Military Games,
765
00:47:08,076 --> 00:47:11,413
it'll be because
you have led them
to a victory.
766
00:47:12,456 --> 00:47:17,377
If they lose,
it'll be because
you failed them.
767
00:47:20,088 --> 00:47:21,882
I don't accept
that responsibility.
768
00:47:21,965 --> 00:47:24,301
It's not negotiable.
769
00:47:30,057 --> 00:47:34,061
If I'm the new squad leader,
my first order is
to screw you, sir!
770
00:47:35,062 --> 00:47:37,147
What did you say to me, turd?
771
00:47:37,231 --> 00:47:40,442
Why don't you go
back to hell
where you came from?
772
00:47:42,027 --> 00:47:46,156
Boy, I am two seconds
from being on you
like white on rice
773
00:47:46,240 --> 00:47:49,201
and a glass of milk
on a paper plate
in a snowstorm!
774
00:47:49,284 --> 00:47:52,162
I will put my foot
so far up your ass,
775
00:47:52,246 --> 00:47:55,207
the water on my knee
will quench your thirst.
776
00:47:55,582 --> 00:47:56,792
Try it.
777
00:48:03,549 --> 00:48:05,425
You want me gone, boy?
778
00:48:06,009 --> 00:48:07,511
Yes, sir.
779
00:48:07,594 --> 00:48:10,639
I said, do you
want me gone, soldier?
780
00:48:10,722 --> 00:48:12,474
Yes, sir!
781
00:48:13,141 --> 00:48:17,646
Then you meet me outside
the ROTC building
at 2100 hours.
782
00:48:18,772 --> 00:48:22,943
You ladies want me gone,
you'll get your chance.
783
00:48:46,300 --> 00:48:51,346
Where is the first-place
trophy from the Virginia
Military Games?
784
00:48:51,430 --> 00:48:53,640
ALL: Wellington Academy, sir.
785
00:48:54,766 --> 00:48:57,811
I want that trophy.
786
00:48:58,061 --> 00:49:01,440
If you turds can
bring me that trophy,
787
00:49:01,523 --> 00:49:04,067
I will resign my command.
788
00:49:04,901 --> 00:49:07,529
This is a black op, gentlemen.
789
00:49:07,613 --> 00:49:12,284
If you are discovered,
I will deny all knowledge,
790
00:49:12,367 --> 00:49:14,995
and you will pay the price.
791
00:49:16,246 --> 00:49:18,665
That is my deal.
792
00:49:20,083 --> 00:49:21,960
Do you accept it?
793
00:49:26,089 --> 00:49:29,092
Sir, yes, sir.
794
00:49:30,552 --> 00:49:33,055
Then bring me my trophy.
795
00:49:50,364 --> 00:49:51,823
STONE:
All right, guys,
this is it.
796
00:49:51,907 --> 00:49:53,909
This is our big chance
to get rid of Payne.
797
00:49:53,992 --> 00:49:55,619
We got two miles
to get to Wellington.
798
00:49:55,702 --> 00:49:58,121
Now let's get it
out of there
as fast as we can.
799
00:49:58,205 --> 00:50:00,123
Let's hustle.
Move it! Let's go!
800
00:50:00,207 --> 00:50:01,833
Go, go, go!
801
00:50:02,209 --> 00:50:04,461
This is your
last chance,
Dotson.
802
00:50:04,544 --> 00:50:07,339
What, you think
I'm gonna come and help
you make me look bad?
803
00:50:07,422 --> 00:50:08,632
Anyway, I've called my dad.
804
00:50:08,715 --> 00:50:10,926
I'm leaving this stupid school.
805
00:50:11,677 --> 00:50:13,553
Bye. Have a good time.
806
00:50:15,722 --> 00:50:16,807
Where you going?
807
00:50:16,890 --> 00:50:18,266
I'm going on a black op.
808
00:50:18,350 --> 00:50:21,019
No, no, no.
You can't come.
You're too little.
809
00:50:21,103 --> 00:50:24,564
Why don't you stay back here
and guard the base, okay?
810
00:50:26,650 --> 00:50:28,151
(DOOR CLOSING)
811
00:50:35,409 --> 00:50:37,035
(TIGER CRYING)
812
00:50:46,420 --> 00:50:48,714
What's the matter
with you, boy?
813
00:50:48,880 --> 00:50:52,801
They won't let me
go on no black op.
They say I'm too little,
814
00:50:52,884 --> 00:50:56,596
and no one ever
lets you do anything
when you're too little.
815
00:50:56,763 --> 00:50:58,098
Ah, phooey.
816
00:50:58,807 --> 00:51:02,561
What about all those stories
about the little people
that do big things?
817
00:51:02,644 --> 00:51:06,106
Like Little Red Riding Hood,
them three little pigs,
818
00:51:06,648 --> 00:51:09,651
Spike Lee
or them Little Rascals.
819
00:51:10,444 --> 00:51:14,156
You ever hear the story
about the
Little Engine That Could?
820
00:51:17,200 --> 00:51:19,244
Let me tell you that story.
821
00:51:24,249 --> 00:51:26,084
Once upon a time,
822
00:51:26,752 --> 00:51:28,879
deep, deep in the jungle,
823
00:51:28,962 --> 00:51:31,506
there was a Little
Engine That Could.
824
00:51:31,965 --> 00:51:35,135
And he was
chugging his way
across the enemy line.
825
00:51:35,218 --> 00:51:36,553
(CHUGGING)
826
00:51:37,679 --> 00:51:39,139
Toot, toot.
827
00:51:40,140 --> 00:51:42,017
This Little Engine's mission
828
00:51:42,142 --> 00:51:46,354
was to take some AK-47s
and a nuclear payload
829
00:51:46,438 --> 00:51:49,691
over the mountain
to the 2063 Battalion.
830
00:51:50,275 --> 00:51:54,988
Needless to say,
there was
plenty opposition.
831
00:51:55,655 --> 00:51:58,241
You think that stopped
the Little Engine
That Could?
832
00:51:58,325 --> 00:52:01,495
No, siree, Bob.
He just kept
chugging along.
833
00:52:01,828 --> 00:52:03,455
(PAYNE CHUGGING)
834
00:52:05,123 --> 00:52:07,000
Toot, toot.
835
00:52:07,876 --> 00:52:09,795
Not even when
they climbed
aboard the train
836
00:52:09,878 --> 00:52:12,422
and popped out the eyes
of the conductor,
837
00:52:12,506 --> 00:52:15,842
and blood and snot
was dripping out
his eye sockets.
838
00:52:16,092 --> 00:52:19,346
You think that stopped
the Little Engine
That Could?
839
00:52:19,930 --> 00:52:23,558
Damn skippy.
He just kept
chugging along.
840
00:52:24,017 --> 00:52:25,310
(CHUGGING)
841
00:52:26,728 --> 00:52:28,396
Toot, toot.
842
00:52:30,774 --> 00:52:35,445
It wasn't until
Charlie rigged a bridge
with plastic explosives
843
00:52:36,696 --> 00:52:40,909
just as the Little Engine
was making his way
across the trestle.
844
00:52:41,868 --> 00:52:42,911
Boom!
845
00:52:42,994 --> 00:52:44,788
An explosion happened.
846
00:52:44,871 --> 00:52:48,124
Blood and guts and spit
and ass was everywhere.
847
00:52:48,458 --> 00:52:51,253
And Bubba come crawling
out the back door,
848
00:52:52,087 --> 00:52:53,713
both legs missing.
849
00:52:54,422 --> 00:52:57,050
Lula May's baby boy!
850
00:52:57,551 --> 00:52:59,928
He look up at me.
He said, "Payne!"
851
00:53:01,847 --> 00:53:04,641
"I can't feel my legs."
852
00:53:05,225 --> 00:53:08,061
I said, "Bubba,
they ain't there."
853
00:53:08,979 --> 00:53:10,772
And I looked down,
854
00:53:10,856 --> 00:53:14,860
and them little bloody nubs
was kicking real fast,
like this here.
855
00:53:14,943 --> 00:53:19,281
And I said,
"Bubba, it's 30 miles
to the nearest town.
856
00:53:19,364 --> 00:53:22,033
"Unless you can flip
upside down and
walk on your hands,"
857
00:53:22,117 --> 00:53:24,160
"you ain't gonna make it."
858
00:53:24,494 --> 00:53:28,081
All of a sudden, Charlie
was all over the place.
859
00:53:28,415 --> 00:53:30,750
It was just me and my sidearm.
860
00:53:31,167 --> 00:53:34,254
And I had no other alternative
861
00:53:34,754 --> 00:53:37,465
but to blast my way out.
862
00:53:38,216 --> 00:53:39,342
(SCREAMS)
863
00:53:39,426 --> 00:53:40,719
(SCREAMS)
864
00:53:41,177 --> 00:53:42,846
"Die, pig! Die!"
865
00:53:42,929 --> 00:53:46,600
"You'll never take
Major Benson Winifred
Payne alive!"
866
00:53:46,683 --> 00:53:49,519
Bam!
"I saw what you did
to my friend!"
867
00:53:49,603 --> 00:53:51,354
Bam! Bam!
Major! Major! Major!
868
00:53:51,438 --> 00:53:52,772
Bam! Bam!
869
00:53:55,942 --> 00:53:57,736
Hello, Miss Walburn.
870
00:53:58,361 --> 00:54:00,989
You just missed
a little bedtime story.
871
00:54:02,490 --> 00:54:04,576
No. I didn't, actually.
872
00:54:06,328 --> 00:54:10,081
In fact, I'd love
to talk to you
about that story.
873
00:54:11,625 --> 00:54:13,376
Perhaps over dinner?
874
00:54:17,005 --> 00:54:18,131
Okay.
875
00:54:19,799 --> 00:54:21,676
Okay.
I'll go get ready.
876
00:54:22,177 --> 00:54:23,428
Me too.
877
00:54:23,511 --> 00:54:24,638
Okay.
878
00:54:24,721 --> 00:54:25,972
Okay.
879
00:54:26,973 --> 00:54:28,058
Okay.
880
00:54:28,141 --> 00:54:30,143
(CHUCKLES)
All right. Bye.
881
00:54:32,979 --> 00:54:34,606
To be continued.
882
00:54:34,814 --> 00:54:38,234
When I come back,
I'll tell you what
Bubba used as a penis.
883
00:54:38,318 --> 00:54:39,653
(EXCLAIMS IN DISGUST)
884
00:54:42,822 --> 00:54:44,658
(DANCE MUSIC PLAYING)
885
00:55:35,250 --> 00:55:37,293
Well, ain't you gonna eat?
886
00:55:38,044 --> 00:55:41,589
I think I'll wait a moment.
My stomach's a little upset.
887
00:55:42,424 --> 00:55:45,385
(CHUCKLES)
Them some mighty
fine vittles.
888
00:55:45,468 --> 00:55:47,595
Wouldn't let 'em go to waste.
889
00:55:49,472 --> 00:55:52,559
You know, I think
you're really making
some wonderful strides
890
00:55:52,642 --> 00:55:55,562
with the way
you're dealing
with the children.
891
00:55:56,312 --> 00:56:00,567
That was almost a really
good thing you tried to do
for Tiger tonight.
892
00:56:01,943 --> 00:56:04,029
May I make a suggestion?
893
00:56:06,406 --> 00:56:07,657
Proceed.
894
00:56:09,492 --> 00:56:11,995
Well, your story,
while colorful,
895
00:56:13,538 --> 00:56:15,206
was a bit rough.
896
00:56:17,375 --> 00:56:19,252
You mean the explosion?
897
00:56:20,378 --> 00:56:24,090
Yes. And the
eye-gouging part.
898
00:56:25,383 --> 00:56:27,427
You need to loosen up.
899
00:56:28,011 --> 00:56:30,305
Not everything
can be about war.
900
00:56:33,600 --> 00:56:35,810
What do you like to do for fun?
901
00:56:40,648 --> 00:56:43,234
I like to hang
upside down blindfolded,
902
00:56:43,318 --> 00:56:46,154
and then I take my gun apart
and I put it back
together real fast
903
00:56:46,237 --> 00:56:48,448
before my nose starts to bleed.
904
00:56:51,451 --> 00:56:53,203
Well, that's great.
905
00:56:55,080 --> 00:56:58,708
But is there anything
that you like that doesn't
have to do with battle?
906
00:56:58,792 --> 00:57:00,335
Like what?
907
00:57:00,418 --> 00:57:01,753
Like golf.
908
00:57:02,962 --> 00:57:04,297
Negative.
909
00:57:05,632 --> 00:57:08,051
Well, do you like
to go to the movies?
910
00:57:09,427 --> 00:57:10,804
Negative.
911
00:57:17,644 --> 00:57:19,687
I don't suppose you dance.
912
00:57:23,858 --> 00:57:27,654
I've been known
to cut a little rug
in my day.
913
00:57:43,211 --> 00:57:45,171
Ain't you gonna dance?
914
00:57:45,797 --> 00:57:47,006
Benson.
915
00:57:53,138 --> 00:57:54,347
Benson,
916
00:57:54,681 --> 00:57:57,100
nobody does the robot anymore.
917
00:57:57,767 --> 00:58:01,437
Then I guess
I gotta dig further
into my repertoire.
918
00:58:02,188 --> 00:58:03,481
(CHUCKLES)
919
00:58:25,003 --> 00:58:26,379
(WHOOPING)
920
00:58:30,341 --> 00:58:31,718
(SCREAMING)
921
00:58:51,237 --> 00:58:52,906
(THUNDER RUMBLING)
922
00:59:13,176 --> 00:59:16,804
Williams, you take these
guys and fan out the left
flank of the school. Go!
923
00:59:16,888 --> 00:59:18,097
Got you.
924
00:59:18,806 --> 00:59:22,268
Wuliger, you take
these two and cover
the right. Got it?
925
00:59:22,352 --> 00:59:24,395
Got it.
All right, come on!
926
01:00:26,833 --> 01:00:28,543
(MAN CLEARS THROAT)
927
01:00:32,630 --> 01:00:34,215
Don't move.
928
01:00:41,389 --> 01:00:43,182
(STUDENTS CLAMORING)
929
01:00:53,693 --> 01:00:55,695
BOY 1:
Madison is a loser.
930
01:00:56,738 --> 01:00:58,281
(ALL CLAMORING)
931
01:01:04,579 --> 01:01:06,706
BOY 2:
Man, get in there.
932
01:01:19,886 --> 01:01:23,306
PAYNE: All right?
And then his
chest cavity exploded.
933
01:01:23,389 --> 01:01:24,474
Boom!
934
01:01:24,557 --> 01:01:26,351
(CHUCKLES)
935
01:01:26,434 --> 01:01:28,353
You know, that was
the first time
936
01:01:28,436 --> 01:01:31,647
I ever drove
a man's nose up
into his brain
937
01:01:31,731 --> 01:01:35,735
causing instant death
and simultaneous
bowel evacuation.
938
01:01:36,819 --> 01:01:39,739
But enough
about me, woman.
What's your story?
939
01:01:40,698 --> 01:01:43,826
I'm surprised
you ain't dropped
about 12 puppies by now.
940
01:01:43,910 --> 01:01:44,952
(CHUCKLES)
941
01:01:45,036 --> 01:01:47,163
Ain't you never been married?
942
01:01:47,914 --> 01:01:49,749
Yeah, I was.
943
01:01:49,916 --> 01:01:52,627
What happened?
You terminate
his command?
944
01:01:53,211 --> 01:01:55,421
No. Actually, he left.
945
01:01:57,090 --> 01:01:59,217
I wanted children.
He didn't.
946
01:02:01,094 --> 01:02:04,138
Any man that would
leave you ought
to be monkey stomped
947
01:02:04,222 --> 01:02:07,183
and have his brains
mailed back
to his mother.
948
01:02:07,266 --> 01:02:08,851
(LAUGHS)
949
01:02:09,018 --> 01:02:10,978
Well, thank you, Benson.
950
01:02:13,940 --> 01:02:15,525
How about you?
951
01:02:15,608 --> 01:02:18,069
Was there ever
a Mrs. Payne?
952
01:02:18,277 --> 01:02:19,529
Negative.
953
01:02:19,612 --> 01:02:22,240
I figure if the
Marines wanted me
to have a wife,
954
01:02:22,323 --> 01:02:23,658
they'd have issued me one.
955
01:02:23,741 --> 01:02:25,201
(CHUCKLES)
956
01:02:28,621 --> 01:02:30,081
Well,
957
01:02:31,124 --> 01:02:33,835
I had a really nice
time tonight, Benson.
958
01:02:34,293 --> 01:02:38,005
Heck, being with you
is almost better
than cleaning my gun.
959
01:02:41,884 --> 01:02:42,885
I got something for you.
960
01:02:42,969 --> 01:02:44,512
Oh, what is it?
961
01:02:44,887 --> 01:02:46,222
It's a bullet.
962
01:02:49,183 --> 01:02:51,102
It's something special.
963
01:02:52,103 --> 01:02:53,813
It's from my heart.
964
01:02:56,649 --> 01:02:59,152
Really? Well,
where'd you get it?
965
01:03:00,111 --> 01:03:01,070
From my heart.
966
01:03:01,154 --> 01:03:04,657
Left ventricle.
I took it out myself
with a field knife.
967
01:03:05,158 --> 01:03:07,285
And I want you to have that.
968
01:03:09,996 --> 01:03:11,664
Thank you, Benson.
969
01:03:29,640 --> 01:03:31,184
Good night.
970
01:03:34,854 --> 01:03:36,689
Good night, princess.
971
01:03:52,872 --> 01:03:55,041
Wee, doggie!
972
01:04:03,508 --> 01:04:04,967
(DOOR CLOSES)
973
01:04:05,927 --> 01:04:07,887
(WHISTLING)
974
01:04:17,855 --> 01:04:21,108
What the hell
are you doing
in my office?
975
01:04:22,235 --> 01:04:24,237
(CHUCKLES) It was a trap.
976
01:04:24,862 --> 01:04:26,364
You set us up.
977
01:04:26,822 --> 01:04:29,617
I might have made
a little anonymous call.
978
01:04:30,409 --> 01:04:34,080
You didn't think
they were just gonna
hand it to you, did you?
979
01:04:34,163 --> 01:04:37,250
We got the crap
kicked out of us
because of you.
980
01:04:37,917 --> 01:04:40,753
Tonight wasn't
about fair or unfair.
981
01:04:41,254 --> 01:04:43,839
It was about achieving
your objective.
982
01:04:45,716 --> 01:04:46,926
Did you?
983
01:04:47,843 --> 01:04:49,971
Did you even see that trophy?
984
01:04:51,430 --> 01:04:52,807
Oh, I saw it.
985
01:04:53,266 --> 01:04:56,769
And when you saw it,
did you want it?
986
01:04:57,395 --> 01:04:59,105
Yeah, to get rid of you.
987
01:04:59,188 --> 01:05:01,440
That's not what I asked.
988
01:05:02,024 --> 01:05:03,609
Did you want it?
989
01:05:04,694 --> 01:05:06,112
I wanted it.
990
01:05:06,445 --> 01:05:07,780
To own it?
991
01:05:08,155 --> 01:05:09,282
Yeah.
992
01:05:09,490 --> 01:05:11,117
Deserve it?
Yeah.
993
01:05:11,325 --> 01:05:13,202
To win it?
Oh, yeah.
994
01:05:13,411 --> 01:05:16,038
Then let's win it,
you bruised-up turd!
995
01:05:16,289 --> 01:05:19,542
If you really
want it, I'll show
you how to earn it.
996
01:05:25,506 --> 01:05:28,676
DR. PHILLIPS: (ON PA)
Welcome, parents,
to Madison School.
997
01:05:28,759 --> 01:05:33,764
For your convenience,
we will be announcing
activities throughout the day.
998
01:05:45,735 --> 01:05:47,987
WULIGER: Hey, Heathcoat,
your parents coming today?
999
01:05:48,070 --> 01:05:50,197
HEATHCOAT:
No, of course not.
1000
01:05:50,656 --> 01:05:51,741
WULIGER:
How about you, Williams?
1001
01:05:51,824 --> 01:05:54,035
WILLIAMS: What,
are you kidding?
Shut up.
1002
01:05:54,118 --> 01:05:58,164
WULIGER: My parents said
they'd come, but
I said I got allergies...
1003
01:06:00,499 --> 01:06:02,668
What the hell happened to you?
1004
01:06:05,046 --> 01:06:07,298
Me? Nothing.
I'm great.
1005
01:06:09,342 --> 01:06:10,843
Look at you, though.
1006
01:06:11,927 --> 01:06:13,971
Regular little soldier man.
1007
01:06:15,056 --> 01:06:16,807
You a hard ass now?
1008
01:06:17,892 --> 01:06:19,477
What are you doing here?
1009
01:06:19,560 --> 01:06:23,272
It's Parents Day,
and I am
your legal guardian.
1010
01:06:25,232 --> 01:06:26,484
You're drunk.
1011
01:06:26,567 --> 01:06:28,694
Don't you walk away from me.
1012
01:06:30,488 --> 01:06:31,530
Oh.
1013
01:06:34,283 --> 01:06:36,202
Give me a little salute.
1014
01:06:36,327 --> 01:06:38,329
I'm not gonna salute you.
1015
01:06:38,579 --> 01:06:40,581
You salute your superiors.
1016
01:06:40,831 --> 01:06:42,667
Or don't they teach
that around here?
1017
01:06:42,750 --> 01:06:44,418
What superior?
1018
01:06:44,502 --> 01:06:46,712
They kicked you out, remember?
1019
01:06:47,880 --> 01:06:50,299
Don't you sass me
like your mother.
1020
01:06:53,177 --> 01:06:55,554
You're mine now.
I own you,
1021
01:06:55,721 --> 01:06:57,723
and you will respect me.
1022
01:06:59,892 --> 01:07:01,560
Now you salute me.
1023
01:07:01,936 --> 01:07:02,978
No.
1024
01:07:04,397 --> 01:07:07,942
You hit that boy again,
I'm gonna do more
than salute you.
1025
01:07:08,067 --> 01:07:09,610
This is between me and my son.
1026
01:07:09,694 --> 01:07:10,820
Stepson.
1027
01:07:10,903 --> 01:07:13,572
Whoever he is,
he's on my time now.
1028
01:07:30,965 --> 01:07:32,633
Now I'm gonna ask you nicely.
1029
01:07:32,717 --> 01:07:35,219
Please return to your vehicle.
1030
01:07:38,139 --> 01:07:39,640
You go on now.
1031
01:08:02,246 --> 01:08:04,373
Go on back to your bunk, son.
1032
01:08:10,337 --> 01:08:11,964
Major Payne, sir.
1033
01:08:12,798 --> 01:08:13,924
Yeah.
1034
01:08:15,843 --> 01:08:17,970
I wanna get that trophy, sir.
1035
01:08:19,680 --> 01:08:21,056
Come again?
1036
01:08:21,474 --> 01:08:23,642
I wanna get that trophy, sir.
1037
01:08:24,059 --> 01:08:26,103
What, you want to steal it?
1038
01:08:26,353 --> 01:08:27,480
No, sir.
1039
01:08:27,563 --> 01:08:29,315
You want to win it?
1040
01:08:29,440 --> 01:08:31,317
I want to earn it, sir.
1041
01:08:33,277 --> 01:08:35,905
The rest of your men
feel the same way?
1042
01:08:39,200 --> 01:08:41,952
Meet me on the parade ground,
1700 hours.
1043
01:08:42,661 --> 01:08:44,330
We got work to do.
1044
01:08:45,122 --> 01:08:46,916
Squad, atten-hut!
1045
01:08:53,672 --> 01:08:55,257
(RESPECT PLAYING)
1046
01:08:55,341 --> 01:08:56,842
(ALL YELLING)
1047
01:09:19,156 --> 01:09:20,533
(CHUCKLING)
1048
01:09:37,049 --> 01:09:38,384
(GRUNTING)
1049
01:09:57,945 --> 01:10:00,739
Two. Three.
1050
01:10:01,490 --> 01:10:03,993
Four. Five.
1051
01:10:05,452 --> 01:10:06,537
Six.
1052
01:10:07,329 --> 01:10:08,497
Seven.
1053
01:10:09,081 --> 01:10:10,249
Eight.
1054
01:10:18,799 --> 01:10:21,510
Forty inches breast to back.
1055
01:11:00,758 --> 01:11:02,134
(INAUDIBLE)
1056
01:11:08,515 --> 01:11:10,184
(WHISTLE SOUNDING)
1057
01:11:27,159 --> 01:11:28,369
Squad!
1058
01:11:28,827 --> 01:11:30,412
Atten-hut!
1059
01:11:31,872 --> 01:11:34,124
Present arms!
1060
01:11:35,501 --> 01:11:38,045
Order arms!
1061
01:11:38,837 --> 01:11:41,173
Left face!
1062
01:11:44,176 --> 01:11:46,095
Right face!
1063
01:11:47,763 --> 01:11:50,057
Parade rest!
1064
01:11:54,770 --> 01:11:56,897
You're still a shit sandwich.
1065
01:11:58,065 --> 01:12:00,192
You're just not a soggy one.
1066
01:12:01,068 --> 01:12:04,029
From now on,
you are no longer turds.
1067
01:12:04,405 --> 01:12:07,449
You've graduated to maggots.
1068
01:12:08,242 --> 01:12:10,035
You're a family.
1069
01:12:10,369 --> 01:12:11,704
A team.
1070
01:12:12,454 --> 01:12:14,248
Let's win them Games.
1071
01:12:27,219 --> 01:12:28,345
Squad!
1072
01:12:28,429 --> 01:12:30,222
Atten-hut!
1073
01:12:31,390 --> 01:12:32,975
General on deck.
1074
01:12:41,567 --> 01:12:45,946
Major, I have news
so good I've decided to
deliver it personally.
1075
01:12:46,530 --> 01:12:48,198
America needs you.
1076
01:12:48,365 --> 01:12:52,369
There's a situation
in Bosnia that requires
your special services.
1077
01:12:52,619 --> 01:12:53,787
As of this moment,
1078
01:12:53,871 --> 01:12:56,665
you are reinstated
in the United States
Marines
1079
01:12:56,749 --> 01:12:58,500
at the rank of
Lieutenant Colonel.
1080
01:12:58,584 --> 01:13:00,127
Thank you, sir.
1081
01:13:00,419 --> 01:13:02,046
Congratulations.
1082
01:13:02,588 --> 01:13:04,339
Your unit
will be leaving
out of Washington.
1083
01:13:04,423 --> 01:13:07,426
You will arrive tomorrow
at 1600 for briefing.
1084
01:13:07,593 --> 01:13:09,470
Here are your tickets.
1085
01:13:11,930 --> 01:13:15,726
General, tomorrow
are the Military Games,
and I was hoping...
1086
01:13:15,809 --> 01:13:17,102
Games?
1087
01:13:17,186 --> 01:13:20,272
Payne, I fought
to get you reinstated.
1088
01:13:21,356 --> 01:13:23,442
You wanted in.
I got you in.
1089
01:13:24,193 --> 01:13:27,488
You don't take this,
there won't be
any more chances.
1090
01:13:34,286 --> 01:13:36,663
Sir, the Major
will be there, sir.
1091
01:13:37,289 --> 01:13:38,582
Good man.
1092
01:13:39,374 --> 01:13:41,418
I'll see you in Washington.
1093
01:14:01,855 --> 01:14:03,649
Hey, hey, hey, Major.
1094
01:14:03,899 --> 01:14:05,484
Where you going?
1095
01:14:05,859 --> 01:14:08,362
Back to killing.
You wanna come?
1096
01:14:10,030 --> 01:14:11,698
I didn't think so.
1097
01:14:13,158 --> 01:14:15,327
Go lead your men into victory.
1098
01:14:16,370 --> 01:14:19,331
Great. What happened
to unity and family
1099
01:14:19,414 --> 01:14:22,292
and all that other bullshit
that you taught us?
1100
01:14:22,376 --> 01:14:25,129
Hey, I never said
families
don't break up.
1101
01:14:26,004 --> 01:14:27,881
Don't you watch Oprah?
1102
01:14:49,069 --> 01:14:51,697
So it's true.
You're just gonna leave.
1103
01:14:57,870 --> 01:15:00,497
You know,
when they're
through with you,
1104
01:15:00,747 --> 01:15:03,375
they're just gonna
cut you loose again.
1105
01:15:04,001 --> 01:15:05,627
I asked to leave.
1106
01:15:06,253 --> 01:15:08,380
Them boys are making me soft.
1107
01:15:08,505 --> 01:15:10,507
Them boys need you.
1108
01:15:11,884 --> 01:15:14,303
All that hard work they did,
they did for you.
1109
01:15:14,386 --> 01:15:16,388
They did it for themselves.
1110
01:15:16,513 --> 01:15:17,723
Benson.
1111
01:15:17,890 --> 01:15:19,349
Look, woman.
1112
01:15:19,433 --> 01:15:22,102
I toured 11 separate
engagements.
1113
01:15:22,186 --> 01:15:23,145
I didn't do all that
1114
01:15:23,228 --> 01:15:27,065
to come back
and be conquered by no woman
and a bunch of kids.
1115
01:15:27,232 --> 01:15:30,277
What'd you really think
I was gonna do, marry you?
1116
01:15:30,360 --> 01:15:32,196
Put up a white picket fence?
1117
01:15:32,279 --> 01:15:35,240
Adopt Tiger and become
the loving male role model?
1118
01:15:35,324 --> 01:15:36,491
That's not me.
1119
01:15:36,575 --> 01:15:38,076
It's not Payne.
1120
01:15:38,160 --> 01:15:41,371
(I NEVER LOVED A MAN
(THE WAY I LOVE YOU) PLAYING)
1121
01:16:31,838 --> 01:16:35,133
I can't believe
he actually left.
1122
01:16:36,468 --> 01:16:38,470
Alex, where are you going?
1123
01:16:40,097 --> 01:16:41,640
To the Games.
1124
01:16:41,974 --> 01:16:45,269
You guys better start
getting ready. We gotta
be there in an hour.
1125
01:16:45,352 --> 01:16:48,355
We don't have
to go to the Games.
Payne's gone.
1126
01:16:49,481 --> 01:16:51,984
We don't have a chance
without Payne.
1127
01:16:52,150 --> 01:16:54,820
Listen.
Payne or no Payne,
1128
01:16:55,404 --> 01:16:58,615
I'm gonna go out there
and win that stupid trophy.
1129
01:16:58,699 --> 01:17:02,244
We busted our asses
off out there
getting ready for this.
1130
01:17:02,369 --> 01:17:05,956
Now I didn't go through
all that to come out
empty-handed.
1131
01:17:07,541 --> 01:17:09,418
So how about it, guys?
1132
01:17:10,252 --> 01:17:12,004
Aren't you with me?
1133
01:17:12,421 --> 01:17:14,172
Sure, I guess.
Yeah.
1134
01:17:15,173 --> 01:17:17,384
(IMITATING PAYNE)
I can't hear you.
1135
01:17:17,467 --> 01:17:19,511
ALL: Sir, yes, sir!
1136
01:17:19,761 --> 01:17:21,555
Just a little bit louder now.
1137
01:17:21,638 --> 01:17:23,807
Sir, yes, sir!
1138
01:17:23,890 --> 01:17:25,642
One more time, you maggots.
1139
01:17:25,726 --> 01:17:28,854
Sir, yes, sir!
1140
01:17:43,660 --> 01:17:46,371
BRAGGART: (ON PA)
Taggert, present arms.
1141
01:17:46,455 --> 01:17:48,665
Stapleton, present arms.
1142
01:17:51,793 --> 01:17:53,795
Wellington, present arms.
1143
01:17:59,343 --> 01:18:01,803
Madison, present arms.
1144
01:18:02,512 --> 01:18:05,223
Cadets, order arms.
1145
01:18:09,936 --> 01:18:12,397
Welcome, men,
to Wellington Academy
1146
01:18:12,481 --> 01:18:16,568
for the 58th annual
Junior ROTC Virginia
Military Games.
1147
01:18:17,235 --> 01:18:19,529
This morning,
you are all equal.
1148
01:18:20,322 --> 01:18:25,077
But by the end of the day
today, we will honor the
finest of you with a trophy,
1149
01:18:25,535 --> 01:18:27,537
the trophy of a champion.
1150
01:18:28,705 --> 01:18:30,457
Let the games begin.
1151
01:18:40,300 --> 01:18:42,636
Good shot, Williams.
I got nothing to say
to you.
1152
01:18:42,719 --> 01:18:44,763
All right, Fox.
Good going.
1153
01:18:45,472 --> 01:18:46,556
Yes!
1154
01:18:47,265 --> 01:18:48,266
(CROWD CHEERING)
1155
01:18:48,350 --> 01:18:51,436
STONE:
Come on, guys!
Maggots, pull!
1156
01:18:51,812 --> 01:18:53,313
(ALL GRUNTING)
1157
01:19:04,616 --> 01:19:06,618
STONE: Go, Tiger! Go! Go!
1158
01:19:37,482 --> 01:19:38,733
(MAN LAUGHING)
1159
01:19:38,817 --> 01:19:40,735
MAN: I got you!
I got you!
1160
01:19:40,819 --> 01:19:42,654
I got you now!
1161
01:20:01,798 --> 01:20:03,425
EMILY: Benson.
1162
01:20:16,188 --> 01:20:17,564
(INAUDIBLE)
1163
01:20:26,865 --> 01:20:28,408
(DOG BARKS)
1164
01:21:26,967 --> 01:21:28,885
(TRAIN WHISTLE BLOWING)
1165
01:21:43,608 --> 01:21:45,986
On your mark.
Get set.
1166
01:21:46,278 --> 01:21:47,362
(GUN FIRES)
1167
01:21:47,445 --> 01:21:49,197
(AUDIENCE CHEERING)
1168
01:21:54,744 --> 01:21:55,870
One, sir. Two, sir.
1169
01:21:55,954 --> 01:21:58,873
Three, sir. Four, sir.
Five, sir. Six, sir.
1170
01:21:58,957 --> 01:22:00,000
Seven, sir.
1171
01:22:00,667 --> 01:22:02,252
Four, sir. Five, sir.
Six, sir...
1172
01:22:20,604 --> 01:22:23,690
STONE: Faster, Heathcoat.
Over the wall. Go! Go!
1173
01:22:24,858 --> 01:22:26,651
Come on, Heathcoat!
You can do it!
I know you can!
1174
01:22:26,735 --> 01:22:29,279
Come on!
Move it, Heathcoat.
Move it! Move it!
1175
01:22:29,404 --> 01:22:31,573
Come on, come on!
DOTSON:
See you later, loser.
1176
01:22:41,666 --> 01:22:43,001
GIRL: Hurry up!
1177
01:22:50,467 --> 01:22:51,801
(COUGHING)
1178
01:23:02,771 --> 01:23:04,022
(GROANS)
1179
01:23:06,608 --> 01:23:08,151
Hey, he just tripped him!
1180
01:23:08,234 --> 01:23:11,988
BRAGGART: The winner
of the relay race
is Wellington Academy.
1181
01:23:14,366 --> 01:23:16,993
Second place,
Madison Preparatory.
1182
01:23:17,827 --> 01:23:19,996
Third place, Stapleton.
1183
01:23:21,081 --> 01:23:22,957
Fourth place, Taggert.
1184
01:23:40,725 --> 01:23:42,227
(WHISTLE BLOWS)
1185
01:23:44,562 --> 01:23:46,898
SOLDIER: All right,
knock it off!
1186
01:23:48,942 --> 01:23:51,152
OFFICER: Hey, hey, hey,
get off of him!
1187
01:23:52,320 --> 01:23:55,448
Hold it right there!
Hey, hey, you! You!
1188
01:23:55,532 --> 01:23:57,659
SOLDIER:
Knock it off!
Knock it off!
1189
01:23:59,244 --> 01:24:00,578
I want that man arrested!
1190
01:24:05,208 --> 01:24:06,793
This is unsatisfactory.
1191
01:24:06,876 --> 01:24:11,548
I demand that the entire
Madison squad be disqualified
from the final competition!
1192
01:24:11,631 --> 01:24:15,927
Lieutenant, I can only
disqualify the cadet
who started the disturbance.
1193
01:24:16,010 --> 01:24:18,263
That's not enough!
Look at 'em!
1194
01:24:18,430 --> 01:24:21,933
These animals are so pathetic,
their own commander
didn't even bother to show up.
1195
01:24:24,018 --> 01:24:26,563
There ain't no need
for name-calling.
1196
01:24:42,120 --> 01:24:44,497
Major Payne.
What are you
doing here?
1197
01:24:44,581 --> 01:24:47,333
I was told you were on
an important assignment.
1198
01:24:47,417 --> 01:24:48,752
Well, what could be
more important
1199
01:24:48,835 --> 01:24:51,671
than my boys
winning this
here competition?
1200
01:24:51,796 --> 01:24:54,299
I suggest we get
this party started.
1201
01:24:54,674 --> 01:24:56,926
Is that okay with you, Colonel?
1202
01:25:00,138 --> 01:25:03,683
Cadets, I'm pleased
to announce the two
top-rated squads
1203
01:25:03,767 --> 01:25:07,353
who will compete for first
and second place in the
parade drill competition.
1204
01:25:07,437 --> 01:25:10,315
Wellington Academy
and Madison Academy.
1205
01:25:14,986 --> 01:25:16,821
Arms, hut!
1206
01:25:17,906 --> 01:25:18,990
Left face!
1207
01:25:19,073 --> 01:25:20,909
BRAGGART:
Ladies and gentlemen,
Wellington Academy.
1208
01:25:20,992 --> 01:25:22,035
Forward march!
1209
01:25:22,118 --> 01:25:23,787
Drill leader,
Sergeant Michael Rachmill.
1210
01:25:23,870 --> 01:25:25,330
Right. Right.
1211
01:25:27,999 --> 01:25:32,128
All right, gentlemen.
Let's look alive here!
We got trophies to win!
1212
01:25:33,213 --> 01:25:35,089
Hello,
Mr. Denial.
1213
01:25:35,840 --> 01:25:36,921
While you were on vacation,
1214
01:25:36,966 --> 01:25:39,677
we've been having
some real
problems here.
1215
01:25:39,844 --> 01:25:43,640
I don't see no problem.
You made it to the finals,
didn't you?
1216
01:25:44,015 --> 01:25:45,892
Yeah, no thanks to you.
1217
01:25:46,643 --> 01:25:49,562
So why did you come back?
We don't need you.
1218
01:25:51,523 --> 01:25:53,858
Maybe I didn't
come back for you.
1219
01:25:54,651 --> 01:25:56,611
Why'd you come back then?
1220
01:25:57,445 --> 01:26:00,740
Maybe I told myself
that I want to
see you win first place
1221
01:26:00,824 --> 01:26:03,243
and ain't gonna
leave until you do.
1222
01:26:04,661 --> 01:26:07,288
So that's it?
It's all about
the trophy?
1223
01:26:11,751 --> 01:26:14,128
Maybe I like you.
1224
01:26:15,713 --> 01:26:16,798
What?
1225
01:26:18,466 --> 01:26:19,801
Just like?
1226
01:26:22,053 --> 01:26:25,557
Maybe I like you a lot.
1227
01:26:26,933 --> 01:26:28,268
That's it?
1228
01:26:29,727 --> 01:26:32,397
Don't push the "maybe," baby.
1229
01:26:33,481 --> 01:26:35,483
Now let's win this thing.
1230
01:26:36,734 --> 01:26:38,486
We have nobody
to lead the drill.
1231
01:26:38,570 --> 01:26:39,988
'Course we do.
1232
01:26:40,071 --> 01:26:41,406
Who?
1233
01:26:41,573 --> 01:26:42,740
Tiger.
1234
01:26:43,366 --> 01:26:44,993
Are you crazy?
What?
1235
01:26:45,076 --> 01:26:46,035
That's right.
1236
01:26:46,119 --> 01:26:49,163
That boy know the drill
like the knob
on the back of his head.
1237
01:26:49,247 --> 01:26:51,708
I can't do it.
I'm too little.
1238
01:26:52,375 --> 01:26:53,751
BRAGGART:
Ladies and gentlemen,
1239
01:26:53,835 --> 01:26:56,170
the Wellington Academy
Drill Team.
1240
01:26:56,254 --> 01:26:57,422
(AUDIENCE CHEERING)
1241
01:26:57,505 --> 01:26:59,465
You need me to
tell you the story
1242
01:26:59,549 --> 01:27:02,594
about the
Little Engine That Could
again?
1243
01:27:04,554 --> 01:27:07,807
Then you get out there
and you toot
that horn, boy.
1244
01:27:09,684 --> 01:27:12,103
Toot, toot.
1245
01:27:14,439 --> 01:27:16,441
Toot, toot.
1246
01:27:20,028 --> 01:27:23,239
BRAGGART:
Ladies and gentlemen,
Madison Preparatory School.
1247
01:27:23,323 --> 01:27:24,949
(CROWD CHEERING)
1248
01:27:28,661 --> 01:27:30,204
(DRUM ROLL)
1249
01:27:31,205 --> 01:27:34,250
Drill Team leader,
Private Kevin "Tiger" Dunne.
1250
01:27:34,334 --> 01:27:36,669
(ALL LAUGHING)
1251
01:27:46,971 --> 01:27:48,056
Bust a move!
1252
01:27:48,139 --> 01:27:49,182
(HIP-HOP MUSIC
PLAYING ON SPEAKERS)
1253
01:27:49,265 --> 01:27:51,434
ALL: (SINGING)
Now here we are together
1254
01:27:51,517 --> 01:27:53,478
Ready to do whatever
1255
01:27:53,561 --> 01:27:55,521
We started out as boys
1256
01:27:55,605 --> 01:27:58,149
Now we're men
And we're making noise
1257
01:27:58,232 --> 01:28:00,026
Stand back and step clear
1258
01:28:00,109 --> 01:28:02,487
Madison cadets
are the ones to fear
1259
01:28:03,029 --> 01:28:06,741
If you don't believe
Battle us and you will see
1260
01:28:07,617 --> 01:28:12,038
Oh, yeah, here we come
Here we come, here we come
1261
01:28:12,205 --> 01:28:14,415
Hip-hop, hip-hop
hip-hop ho
1262
01:28:14,499 --> 01:28:16,709
Hip-hop, hip-hop
hip-hop ho
1263
01:28:16,793 --> 01:28:19,003
We can get down
'Cause it's
in our souls
1264
01:28:19,087 --> 01:28:20,755
We can get down
'Cause it's in our souls
1265
01:28:20,838 --> 01:28:22,382
Hit me with a one, two
1266
01:28:22,465 --> 01:28:23,508
One, two
1267
01:28:23,591 --> 01:28:24,759
Hit me with a three, four
1268
01:28:24,842 --> 01:28:25,885
Three, four
1269
01:28:25,969 --> 01:28:27,971
ALL: One, two, three, four
1270
01:28:28,054 --> 01:28:30,556
One, two, three, four
1271
01:28:30,640 --> 01:28:32,684
Mark time, march!
1272
01:28:32,892 --> 01:28:34,686
(CADETS EXCLAIMING)
1273
01:28:34,852 --> 01:28:36,354
Present arms.
1274
01:28:38,439 --> 01:28:39,941
Forward march.
1275
01:28:40,274 --> 01:28:42,527
(GRUNTING)
1276
01:28:48,825 --> 01:28:50,702
Order arms!
1277
01:28:56,874 --> 01:28:58,334
Philly stomp.
1278
01:29:06,843 --> 01:29:08,177
ALL: Ho!
1279
01:29:43,004 --> 01:29:44,630
(SINGING) One, two, three!
1280
01:29:44,714 --> 01:29:46,174
Get down on the hip-hop
1281
01:29:46,257 --> 01:29:48,426
Get down and get funky
and you don't stop
1282
01:29:48,509 --> 01:29:50,053
What, do that, do that
1283
01:29:50,136 --> 01:29:51,179
Go, Tiger
1284
01:29:51,262 --> 01:29:54,766
Do that, do that
Get down, do that, do that
1285
01:29:54,849 --> 01:29:58,269
Go, Tiger, do that, do that
Get down, do that
1286
01:29:58,394 --> 01:30:00,188
(WHOOPING) Do that, go, Tiger
1287
01:30:00,271 --> 01:30:01,647
Do that, do that
1288
01:30:01,731 --> 01:30:03,483
Get down Do that, do that
1289
01:30:03,608 --> 01:30:05,401
(SCREAMING) Go, Tiger
1290
01:30:06,944 --> 01:30:08,613
(GUNS FIRE) Salute.
1291
01:30:09,363 --> 01:30:11,032
BRAGGART:
Madison Preparatory School.
1292
01:30:11,115 --> 01:30:12,742
(CROWD CHEERING)
1293
01:31:02,834 --> 01:31:04,961
Company, atten-hut!
1294
01:31:10,258 --> 01:31:12,301
Sir, squad is formed, sir.
1295
01:31:15,138 --> 01:31:16,222
Post.
1296
01:31:23,062 --> 01:31:28,359
My name
is Major Benson
Winifred Payne!
1297
01:31:29,485 --> 01:31:32,864
I'd like to be
the first
to welcome you
1298
01:31:32,947 --> 01:31:34,824
to the Madison School.
1299
01:31:35,700 --> 01:31:37,910
What we've tried
to develop here
1300
01:31:37,994 --> 01:31:40,538
is a family environment.
1301
01:31:40,997 --> 01:31:43,666
One of trust and understanding.
1302
01:31:44,876 --> 01:31:50,047
I'd like for you to think
of me not only as
your commanding officer
1303
01:31:50,506 --> 01:31:52,175
but as your friend.
1304
01:31:52,258 --> 01:31:53,759
(BARKS)
1305
01:31:54,802 --> 01:31:57,513
And what the hell is that?
1306
01:31:58,222 --> 01:31:59,557
He's mine.
1307
01:32:01,225 --> 01:32:02,560
(WHISTLES)
1308
01:32:07,648 --> 01:32:09,400
That a boy. Sit.
1309
01:32:10,067 --> 01:32:11,360
Good boy.
1310
01:32:17,200 --> 01:32:22,121
You know, there ain't no
pets allowed on these here
premises, Mr. Ace Ventura.
1311
01:32:22,663 --> 01:32:24,582
Yeah, well, maybe
that doesn't
apply to me.
1312
01:32:24,665 --> 01:32:26,792
He's my blind
seeing-eye dog.
1313
01:32:29,420 --> 01:32:32,757
What in the world
would anybody want
with a blind dog?
1314
01:32:33,591 --> 01:32:34,926
The dog ain't blind.
1315
01:32:35,009 --> 01:32:36,969
I'm the one
that's blind,
you idiot.
1316
01:32:39,597 --> 01:32:41,724
Oh, I see
you and your friend
Cujo here
1317
01:32:41,807 --> 01:32:43,809
got a little
attitudinal problem,
1318
01:32:43,893 --> 01:32:45,645
needs some readjusting.
1319
01:32:45,728 --> 01:32:49,106
Well, I'm gonna
fix that up quick,
fast and in a hurry.
1320
01:32:49,190 --> 01:32:50,691
Hey, Corporal.
1321
01:32:53,402 --> 01:32:55,905
Go tell Mama
to bring
my field knife.
1322
01:33:03,579 --> 01:33:05,164
(DOG MOANING)
1323
01:33:08,626 --> 01:33:10,294
(WHIMPERING)
1324
01:33:12,505 --> 01:33:13,798
(CHUCKLES)
1325
01:33:27,645 --> 01:33:29,272
(PAYNE LAUGHING)