1
00:00:25,247 --> 00:00:27,078
(Helicopter)

2
00:00:28,687 --> 00:00:30,200
(Crash)

3
00:00:31,887 --> 00:00:34,560
I must have read that ten times.

4
00:00:34,607 --> 00:00:36,967
I love a bit of Oscar Wilde,
I suppose.

5
00:00:37,007 --> 00:00:39,282
–He does it for me.
–Oh, Wilde.

6
00:00:39,327 --> 00:00:41,727
“The only thing worse than being
talked about

7
00:00:41,767 --> 00:00:45,157
–“is not being talked about.”
Exactly.

8
00:00:45,207 --> 00:00:47,927
Wilde couldn't have
put it better himself.

9
00:00:47,967 --> 00:00:51,676
It was him who said that,
actually, Father.

10
00:00:52,527 --> 00:00:57,407
Yes, yes, but I don't think he'd have
said it in that kind of ladylike way.

11
00:00:57,447 --> 00:00:59,438
You're a charmer, Father.

12
00:00:59,487 --> 00:01:02,807
Miss Clarke, I don't suppose
you'd sign a copy of the latest?

13
00:01:02,847 --> 00:01:04,917
I'd be delighted.

14
00:01:04,967 --> 00:01:07,879
Father Ted Cri…
No, just Ted Crilly.

15
00:01:07,927 --> 00:01:09,647
Don't bother about the Father.

16
00:01:09,687 --> 00:01:12,360
I envy you really, Father.

17
00:01:12,407 --> 00:01:16,116
You must have great peace of mind,
being a priest.

18
00:01:16,167 --> 00:01:19,204
That's what I'd love.
A feeling of serenity.

19
00:01:19,247 --> 00:01:21,847
Oh, I have serenity
coming out of my ears.

20
00:01:21,887 --> 00:01:25,781
Too much serenity, really.
Bit of excitement would suit me.

21
00:01:25,807 --> 00:01:28,287
Thanks for the autograph.
I have to go.

22
00:01:28,327 --> 00:01:30,807
Some nuns are visiting us
so we're busy.

23
00:01:30,847 --> 00:01:32,439
–Ok, Father.
–Thank you.

24
00:01:32,487 --> 00:01:34,533
–Good luck with the book.
–Bye.

25
00:01:40,767 --> 00:01:42,200
Feck.

26
00:01:42,247 --> 00:01:44,715
–Hello, there.
–Father Curley.

27
00:01:44,767 --> 00:01:47,201
–Going up?
–Thanks.

28
00:01:52,887 --> 00:01:54,718
(Ted hums )

29
00:02:06,647 --> 00:02:08,797
Well…

30
00:02:08,847 --> 00:02:11,441
–Good luck again.
–Thank you, Father.

31
00:02:11,487 --> 00:02:13,557
–Bye.
–Goodbye.

32
00:02:16,247 --> 00:02:17,919
Well, hello again.

33
00:02:17,967 --> 00:02:19,286
Ah, hello.

34
00:02:19,327 --> 00:02:21,367
We have to stop meeting like this.

35
00:02:21,407 --> 00:02:22,567
(High-pitched laugh)

36
00:02:22,607 --> 00:02:24,563
Goodbye again.

37
00:02:24,607 --> 00:02:26,643
Good luck with the book.

38
00:02:38,967 --> 00:02:40,559
(Mouths )

39
00:02:43,167 --> 00:02:44,805
(Ted) Change.

40
00:02:44,847 --> 00:02:47,520
Please change, for God's sake.

41
00:02:51,567 --> 00:02:54,365
Good luck with the book.

42
00:02:54,407 --> 00:02:55,476
(Mouths )

43
00:02:59,327 --> 00:03:01,602
Please change. Please!

44
00:03:01,647 --> 00:03:03,046
Please change.

45
00:03:03,087 --> 00:03:05,327
Hail Mary, full of grace,
the Lord's…

46
00:03:05,367 --> 00:03:08,086
–Bye.
–Here we go.

47
00:03:08,127 --> 00:03:10,436
Oh, God Almighty.

48
00:03:11,487 --> 00:03:13,557
Oh, Christ.

49
00:03:14,687 --> 00:03:16,484
Sorry about that.

50
00:03:34,687 --> 00:03:37,201
All right, what's going on?

51
00:03:40,367 --> 00:03:44,042
–Miss Clarke.
–What are you doing here?

52
00:03:44,087 --> 00:03:46,043
I'm the parish priest here.

53
00:03:46,087 --> 00:03:50,127
That's extraordinary! I think
someone's trying to keep us together.

54
00:03:50,167 --> 00:03:51,486
(Laughs )

55
00:03:51,527 --> 00:03:55,127
I've rented a cottage on the island,
but it's not ready yet.

56
00:03:55,167 --> 00:03:59,193
The builders suggested I stay here
for the night. Is that Ok?

57
00:03:59,207 --> 00:04:01,243
This is amazing!

58
00:04:01,287 --> 00:04:03,801
We were both going the same way!

59
00:04:05,487 --> 00:04:08,647
Of course, you'd be very welcome
to stay the night.

60
00:04:08,687 --> 00:04:11,525
Hello, Father.
I see you've met your guest.

61
00:04:11,527 --> 00:04:13,647
Miss Clarke is staying the night.

62
00:04:13,687 --> 00:04:15,967
–Will you show her the spare room?
–What?

63
00:04:16,007 --> 00:04:18,047
Will you show her the spare room?

64
00:04:18,087 --> 00:04:21,717
Well, yes. It's just that
I was going to make some tea.

65
00:04:21,727 --> 00:04:23,479
You can do that later.

66
00:04:23,527 --> 00:04:26,807
I think tea is a bit common
for Miss Clarke's tastes.

67
00:04:26,847 --> 00:04:28,678
All right, come on.

68
00:04:30,527 --> 00:04:31,562
Have a shower.

69
00:04:31,607 --> 00:04:34,201
I mean have a shower if you want.

70
00:04:35,207 --> 00:04:38,358
I don't want you
to have a shower, I mean…

71
00:04:38,407 --> 00:04:42,895
you might like to get out of your
clothes, not that it's my concern.

72
00:04:43,527 --> 00:04:44,721
Mrs Doyle.

73
00:05:01,687 --> 00:05:03,598
Ted.

74
00:05:03,647 --> 00:05:05,478
Who was that?

75
00:05:05,527 --> 00:05:08,360
Dougal, what do you think
you're doing?

76
00:05:08,407 --> 00:05:10,125
I was hiding.

77
00:05:10,167 --> 00:05:12,635
–Hiding from who?
–From your woman.

78
00:05:12,687 --> 00:05:15,567
I heard her coming
so I hid behind the chair.

79
00:05:15,607 --> 00:05:17,404
Dougal, she's only a woman.

80
00:05:17,447 --> 00:05:19,881
I don't know very many women, Ted.

81
00:05:19,927 --> 00:05:22,487
Dougal, what about your mother?

82
00:05:22,527 --> 00:05:25,607
My mother⁈ She's hardly
what you'd call a woman.

83
00:05:25,647 --> 00:05:28,047
She's not like the women
on the telly.

84
00:05:28,087 --> 00:05:31,321
Like the Gladiators.
She wouldn't be one of them.

85
00:05:31,327 --> 00:05:34,125
I'm… sure that's their loss.

86
00:05:34,167 --> 00:05:36,367
What about Mrs Doyle? She's a woman.

87
00:05:36,407 --> 00:05:37,487
Ah, now. Come on.

88
00:05:37,527 --> 00:05:39,887
She is. She's every bit
as much a woman

89
00:05:39,927 --> 00:05:43,367
as one of the Gladiators
or the lady who runs Pakistan.

90
00:05:43,407 --> 00:05:47,407
What you mean is, she's not
attractive in the conventional sense.

91
00:05:47,447 --> 00:05:49,567
You can't think like that any more.

92
00:05:49,607 --> 00:05:51,723
Anyway, who's that one?

93
00:05:51,767 --> 00:05:54,607
She's a novelist.
I was at her book-signing.

94
00:05:54,647 --> 00:05:58,527
She's taken a cottage on the island.
Very sophisticated lady.

95
00:05:58,567 --> 00:05:59,761
(Screaming)

96
00:06:05,527 --> 00:06:08,101
I'm sorry.
I just got a bit of a shock.

97
00:06:08,127 --> 00:06:10,516
Come on now, Father.

98
00:06:10,567 --> 00:06:12,239
This is Father Hackett.

99
00:06:13,647 --> 00:06:17,720
He gets a bit confused sometimes.
Come on, Father.

100
00:06:17,767 --> 00:06:21,237
No, not your room.
Not your room. No…

101
00:06:23,127 --> 00:06:25,595
Arse! Feck! Arse!

102
00:06:25,647 --> 00:06:28,525
–Give me the cards quickly.
–Arse! Feck!

103
00:06:28,567 --> 00:06:30,762
–What colour?
–Blue, quickly!

104
00:06:30,807 --> 00:06:32,445
Arse! F…

105
00:06:34,207 --> 00:06:36,781
Blue has a great
calming effect on him.

106
00:06:36,807 --> 00:06:39,082
That's Miss Clarke. Dougal!

107
00:06:39,127 --> 00:06:41,641
–Woman!
–Yes, it is a woman, Father.

108
00:06:41,687 --> 00:06:43,359
Right on the button.

109
00:06:43,407 --> 00:06:46,126
Well, have a lovely stay, then.

110
00:07:18,327 --> 00:07:19,646
(Door opens )

111
00:07:21,127 --> 00:07:22,765
Hello, Dougal.

112
00:07:22,807 --> 00:07:27,427
Good idea, Ted. You're throwing out
the ones you couldn't get through.

113
00:07:28,487 --> 00:07:32,047
No. No, I was just arranging them
in alphabetical order.

114
00:07:32,087 --> 00:07:35,204
–Fair enough.
–You're bringing Father Jack out?

115
00:07:35,247 --> 00:07:37,886
Yes. I suppose so.
D'you want to come?

116
00:07:37,927 --> 00:07:40,600
No, no. I'd better stay here and…

117
00:07:40,647 --> 00:07:43,115
prepare for the nuns.

118
00:07:43,167 --> 00:07:45,965
Father, it's a beautiful day out.

119
00:07:46,007 --> 00:07:47,076
Me arse.

120
00:07:47,127 --> 00:07:50,915
Would you like him on manual
or automatic, Father?

121
00:07:50,967 --> 00:07:52,923
Automatic. It's a nice day.

122
00:07:52,967 --> 00:07:55,767
–Might as well take it easy.
–Take your time.

123
00:07:55,807 --> 00:07:57,035
Fair enough.

124
00:07:57,087 --> 00:07:58,679
(Gasps in excitement)

125
00:08:06,967 --> 00:08:11,287
Well, Father, I never thought we'd
have anyone like her staying here.

126
00:08:11,327 --> 00:08:14,763
Hmm? Oh, Miss Clarke.
It's very exciting, isn't it?

127
00:08:14,807 --> 00:08:18,647
–Famous novelist here.
–You've never read any of her books.

128
00:08:18,687 --> 00:08:20,678
Actually, I'm a bit of a fan.

129
00:08:20,727 --> 00:08:23,560
I was at her book-signing
the other day.

130
00:08:23,607 --> 00:08:27,767
I'm surprised, Father. I didn't think
you'd like that sort of thing.

131
00:08:27,807 --> 00:08:29,647
I read a bit of one of them once.

132
00:08:29,687 --> 00:08:33,646
God I couldn't finish it.
The language. Unbelievable.

133
00:08:33,687 --> 00:08:37,805
It's a bit gritty. But that's
the modern world, Mrs Doyle.

134
00:08:37,847 --> 00:08:41,920
It's a bit much for me, Father.
“Feck this” and “feck that”.

135
00:08:41,967 --> 00:08:43,878
Yes, Mrs Doyle.

136
00:08:43,927 --> 00:08:47,203
“You big bastard.”
Oh, dreadful language.

137
00:08:47,247 --> 00:08:50,080
“You big hairy arse.”
“You big fecker.”

138
00:08:50,127 --> 00:08:52,118
Fierce stuff!

139
00:08:52,167 --> 00:08:54,556
And of course, the F-word, Father.

140
00:08:54,607 --> 00:08:59,556
The bad F-word. Worse than feck.
You know the one I mean.

141
00:08:59,607 --> 00:09:00,927
Yes, I do, Mrs Doyle.

142
00:09:00,967 --> 00:09:04,562
“F you.” “F your effing wife.”

143
00:09:04,607 --> 00:09:07,567
I don't know why they have to use
language like that.

144
00:09:07,607 --> 00:09:12,283
“I'll stick this effing pitchfork up
your hole.” That was another one.

145
00:09:12,327 --> 00:09:14,287
I see what you mean, Mrs Doyle.

146
00:09:14,327 --> 00:09:16,327
“Bastard this” and “bastard that”.

147
00:09:16,367 --> 00:09:19,847
You can't move for the bastards.
It's wall-to-wall bastards.

148
00:09:19,887 --> 00:09:22,989
–Is it Mrs Doyle?
–“You bastard.” “You fecker.”

149
00:09:23,007 --> 00:09:27,205
“You bollocks! Get your bollocks
out of my face.”

150
00:09:27,247 --> 00:09:30,080
Yes, you just go and prepare
for the nuns.

151
00:09:30,127 --> 00:09:33,517
(Mrs Doyle ) “Ride me sideways”
was another one.

152
00:09:42,367 --> 00:09:45,120
There we go. Hah! Miss Clarke!

153
00:09:46,127 --> 00:09:50,166
–How did you sleep?
–Like a log. It's so peaceful here.

154
00:09:50,207 --> 00:09:53,047
I need a bit of peace
after the year I've had.

155
00:09:53,087 --> 00:09:54,440
I see.

156
00:09:54,487 --> 00:09:58,116
(Sighs ) I've had a rough time
of it recently, Father.

157
00:09:58,167 --> 00:10:01,125
My husband left me for another woman.

158
00:10:01,167 --> 00:10:03,727
Though it was my fault, I suppose.

159
00:10:03,767 --> 00:10:08,321
The sex was getting a little boring
and I did nothing to spice it up.

160
00:10:08,807 --> 00:10:11,367
Ha! Isn't that always the way?

161
00:10:12,527 --> 00:10:15,233
But nearer the end,
I tried a few things.

162
00:10:15,247 --> 00:10:18,159
I used to dress up
in revealing lingerie,

163
00:10:18,207 --> 00:10:20,207
and when he came through the door

164
00:10:20,247 --> 00:10:24,075
I leapt on top of him and had sex
right there in the hall.

165
00:10:27,167 --> 00:10:29,167
So, you had a good sleep, then?

166
00:10:29,207 --> 00:10:31,357
Yes. Yes, thank you.

167
00:10:31,407 --> 00:10:34,847
Oh, God. I'm sorry, Father.
I've probably shocked you.

168
00:10:34,887 --> 00:10:36,479
Oh! Go away with you.

169
00:10:36,527 --> 00:10:40,751
I've heard more shocking things
through the years in confession.

170
00:10:47,927 --> 00:10:50,566
Do you every think about the future?

171
00:10:50,607 --> 00:10:55,237
I used to think about the future,
and then it became the present,

172
00:10:55,287 --> 00:10:58,040
so I thought about it
quite often then,

173
00:10:58,087 --> 00:11:01,767
and then it was in the past
so I didn't think about it that much.

174
00:11:01,807 --> 00:11:04,685
Do you like Dostoevsky?

175
00:11:04,727 --> 00:11:07,924
Oh, him. Yes.
He's one of my favourites.

176
00:11:07,967 --> 00:11:10,561
I have read that book… ten times.

177
00:11:10,607 --> 00:11:13,643
You're reading it again.
You're on page seven.

178
00:11:15,087 --> 00:11:20,241
Did you feel his sense of commitment
waned towards the end?

179
00:11:20,287 --> 00:11:22,755
Yes.

180
00:11:22,807 --> 00:11:25,327
When did you feel
that began to happen?

181
00:11:25,367 --> 00:11:28,120
Towards the end, you know.

182
00:11:28,167 --> 00:11:31,398
After he'd finished
writing about the crime bit

183
00:11:31,447 --> 00:11:33,493
and moved on to the punishment.

184
00:11:33,527 --> 00:11:35,647
I felt it dragged a bit there for me.

185
00:11:35,687 --> 00:11:39,157
I always thought that if Joyce,
k eats and Lawrence

186
00:11:39,207 --> 00:11:42,807
were sitting in a room together
and Dostoevsky walked in,

187
00:11:42,847 --> 00:11:46,741
there'd be a hell of a fight
for the last piece of pudding.

188
00:11:52,967 --> 00:11:56,755
It's great to talk to somebody
about these things.

189
00:11:56,807 --> 00:12:01,483
My husband, there was a man who
was really afraid of Virginia Woolf.

190
00:12:02,807 --> 00:12:05,367
Why, was…

191
00:12:05,407 --> 00:12:07,783
Was she following him,
or something?

192
00:12:13,047 --> 00:12:14,844
Oh, Father!

193
00:12:16,607 --> 00:12:20,919
You… You wouldn't like to come up
to the cottage later?

194
00:12:21,967 --> 00:12:25,084
For a little drink?
Maybe some more book talk.

195
00:12:25,127 --> 00:12:28,244
–That would be delightflug.
–Sorry?

196
00:12:28,287 --> 00:12:30,118
I'd be delightigetted.

197
00:12:32,207 --> 00:12:35,085
I'll see you later, then.
About seven?

198
00:12:35,127 --> 00:12:37,038
Seven o'clock.

199
00:12:37,087 --> 00:12:38,805
(Sighs )

200
00:12:38,847 --> 00:12:40,644
Seven, right.

201
00:12:46,727 --> 00:12:48,558
It's only a drink.

202
00:12:58,607 --> 00:13:00,727
So, you'd no trouble getting here?

203
00:13:00,767 --> 00:13:04,840
No. I drove the Renault,
Sister Margaret took the Mini.

204
00:13:04,887 --> 00:13:08,327
It's great having the old car
all the same, isn't it?

205
00:13:08,367 --> 00:13:11,040
Anyone for more tea?

206
00:13:12,087 --> 00:13:13,486
Sister Margaret?

207
00:13:13,527 --> 00:13:16,325
–(Meekly) No thank you, Father.
–Sorry?

208
00:13:16,367 --> 00:13:18,244
She's fine, Father.

209
00:13:18,287 --> 00:13:20,847
At what time does the Mass
tonight start?

210
00:13:20,887 --> 00:13:24,121
–Seven o'clock.
–Grand. We don't want to be late.

211
00:13:24,167 --> 00:13:27,682
–Seven isn't too… Aaaah!
–Are you all right?

212
00:13:27,727 --> 00:13:29,877
Yes, yes it's… There's just…

213
00:13:29,927 --> 00:13:32,567
Seven o'clock,
I may have to leave early.

214
00:13:32,607 --> 00:13:36,236
During the Mass?
You couldn't leave during the Mass.

215
00:13:36,287 --> 00:13:37,640
It's just, you see…

216
00:13:37,687 --> 00:13:40,167
Sister Julia says
you say a lovely Mass.

217
00:13:40,207 --> 00:13:43,597
She said, you said the nicest
Mass she ever heard.

218
00:13:43,647 --> 00:13:47,720
Sister Concepta said that
last year's Mass here was fabulous.

219
00:13:47,767 --> 00:13:50,804
Ten out of ten,
and she's hard to please.

220
00:13:50,847 --> 00:13:53,817
She's seen, what…
Is it 50 Masses since then?

221
00:13:55,207 --> 00:13:59,405
Show Father Crilly the photographs.
You'll like these, Father.

222
00:14:02,367 --> 00:14:05,167
There's you, saying the Mass
here last year.

223
00:14:05,207 --> 00:14:09,166
And that's you saying
the Mass the year before.

224
00:14:09,207 --> 00:14:13,086
What's that? Oh, yes,
your sister-in-law's funeral.

225
00:14:13,127 --> 00:14:15,118
That's my personal favourite.

226
00:14:16,287 --> 00:14:18,267
That's when you had the beard.

227
00:14:21,927 --> 00:14:26,682
Actually, Father, you couldn't sign
a few of them for us, could you?

228
00:14:26,727 --> 00:14:28,763
–The photographs?
–Yes.

229
00:14:28,807 --> 00:14:30,001
All right.

230
00:14:30,047 --> 00:14:33,083
Could you put on my one,
“to Sister Assumpta”?

231
00:14:33,087 --> 00:14:34,839
Sure.

232
00:14:34,887 --> 00:14:36,366
Oh!

233
00:14:36,407 --> 00:14:39,160
Father, Sister Margaret
has a question.

234
00:14:39,207 --> 00:14:40,322
Yes?

235
00:14:40,367 --> 00:14:43,086
Where d'you get ideas
for your sermons?

236
00:14:43,127 --> 00:14:45,607
Where do you get your ideas
for your sermons?

237
00:14:45,647 --> 00:14:48,115
Oh, just…

238
00:14:48,167 --> 00:14:51,239
overheard conversations,
the news, whatever.

239
00:14:51,287 --> 00:14:52,927
To be honest, I might not…

240
00:14:52,967 --> 00:14:56,357
(Shrieks ) Sister Julia,
do you have a question?

241
00:14:56,407 --> 00:14:59,877
What's your most embarrassing
moment saying Mass?

242
00:14:59,927 --> 00:15:04,557
Oh, I suppose it was the time
I forgot my sister-in-law's name.

243
00:15:06,487 --> 00:15:08,487
That got me hot under the collar.

244
00:15:08,527 --> 00:15:10,404
(All giggling)

245
00:15:14,167 --> 00:15:15,839
Anyway…

246
00:15:15,887 --> 00:15:20,517
Anyway, the thing is, I might not
be able to say this evening's Mass.

247
00:15:20,567 --> 00:15:22,364
(Silence )

248
00:15:23,247 --> 00:15:27,445
–What, Father?
–I have something important to do.

249
00:15:27,487 --> 00:15:30,684
Not more important
than saying Mass, Father?

250
00:15:30,727 --> 00:15:33,924
It's just, someone I know is dying.

251
00:15:33,967 --> 00:15:36,845
Oh, dear. Is it serious?

252
00:15:39,367 --> 00:15:43,087
Yes. In this case, the person dying
is quite seriously ill.

253
00:15:43,127 --> 00:15:45,173
It's someone we know very well.

254
00:15:46,407 --> 00:15:49,399
Nuns! Nuns! Reverse! Reverse!

255
00:15:49,447 --> 00:15:51,756
Reverse! Reverse!

256
00:15:51,807 --> 00:15:54,480
Hello Father McGuire.

257
00:15:54,527 --> 00:15:58,247
Father Crilly was just telling us
about your friend, dying.

258
00:15:58,287 --> 00:15:59,800
Who was that, Ted?

259
00:16:01,367 --> 00:16:04,882
Um… Er… Old Jim.

260
00:16:04,927 --> 00:16:07,680
Ah, is he dying? Poor old Jim.

261
00:16:07,727 --> 00:16:10,036
He won't like that.

262
00:16:11,047 --> 00:16:13,038
He's terribly down about it.

263
00:16:14,087 --> 00:16:16,726
–Wait a second. Jim Halpin?
–Yes.

264
00:16:16,767 --> 00:16:20,397
I was talking to him earlier
and he didn't say a thing.

265
00:16:21,847 --> 00:16:25,806
Well, that's Jim.
Brave is not the word.

266
00:16:25,847 --> 00:16:28,647
He's just outside.
Hold on and I'll get him.

267
00:16:28,687 --> 00:16:31,657
What's he doing outside?
He should be in bed.

268
00:16:31,687 --> 00:16:34,967
I met him earlier.
He wanted the lend of some sugar.

269
00:16:35,007 --> 00:16:38,807
Dougal, at a moment like this,
this man needs peace. Don't…

270
00:16:38,847 --> 00:16:41,725
–Hello, Jim.
–Hello, Father.

271
00:16:41,767 --> 00:16:43,678
Hello, Sisters.

272
00:16:43,727 --> 00:16:46,844
Now Jim, you never told me
you were ill.

273
00:16:46,887 --> 00:16:50,846
What? Oh, I had a bit of a cold
a few weeks back.

274
00:16:50,887 --> 00:16:53,720
A cold? Ted said you were dying.

275
00:16:53,767 --> 00:16:56,759
Dying? Oh, no.

276
00:16:57,407 --> 00:16:59,398
I don't think so, anyway.

277
00:17:01,487 --> 00:17:04,559
It's just I was talking
to Dr Sinnott.

278
00:17:04,607 --> 00:17:06,598
He said…

279
00:17:08,127 --> 00:17:12,006
He said you might be dying
but he wasn't 100% sure himself

280
00:17:12,047 --> 00:17:14,487
so don't go off
worrying unnecessarily.

281
00:17:14,527 --> 00:17:18,447
–I'd better give him a call.
–I wouldn't go calling him, Jim.

282
00:17:18,487 --> 00:17:20,398
And why not?

283
00:17:22,087 --> 00:17:24,601
He… He can't use the phone.

284
00:17:27,047 --> 00:17:29,038
He's gone deaf.

285
00:17:30,167 --> 00:17:31,964
Dr Sinnott's gone deaf?

286
00:17:33,127 --> 00:17:35,163
That's terrible.

287
00:17:36,567 --> 00:17:37,886
It is.

288
00:17:37,927 --> 00:17:40,760
Oh, wait a second! There he is now.

289
00:17:43,047 --> 00:17:44,878
Dr Sinnott!

290
00:17:44,927 --> 00:17:47,202
He heard that all right, Ted.

291
00:17:47,247 --> 00:17:49,442
Doctor, would you have a moment?

292
00:17:49,487 --> 00:17:53,036
Wait, I've just remembered. Ha!

293
00:17:54,047 --> 00:17:56,436
Jim is not dying…

294
00:17:56,487 --> 00:17:58,533
and Dr Sinnott's not gone deaf.

295
00:17:59,727 --> 00:18:02,480
I was thinking
of two different people.

296
00:18:02,527 --> 00:18:05,299
So you will be able to say
tonight's Mass?

297
00:18:05,327 --> 00:18:08,637
Yes! Yes, I will. Of course.

298
00:18:08,687 --> 00:18:12,779
Thanks to Father Dougal for clearing
up that misunderstanding.

299
00:18:14,087 --> 00:18:16,840
Ted. Ted, you're hurting me.

300
00:18:20,887 --> 00:18:23,162
I have to go straight after this.

301
00:18:23,207 --> 00:18:26,367
–You'll have to look after the nuns.
–Fair enough.

302
00:18:26,407 --> 00:18:29,207
–What'll I do with them?
–Whatever you want.

303
00:18:29,247 --> 00:18:32,087
–Try not to kill them.
–No chance of that, Ted.

304
00:18:32,127 --> 00:18:34,516
–Remember Sister Janita?
–Oh, yeah.

305
00:18:34,567 --> 00:18:37,407
That was a bit too close
for comfort all right.

306
00:18:37,447 --> 00:18:39,438
Just be careful this time.

307
00:18:39,487 --> 00:18:41,603
Oh, God. Are they all in there?

308
00:18:41,647 --> 00:18:44,002
Yeah. Like peas in a pub, Ted.

309
00:18:44,047 --> 00:18:45,958
Pod.

310
00:18:47,007 --> 00:18:50,043
–Let's go. See you later.
–Ok. Good luck, Ted.

311
00:18:58,087 --> 00:18:59,566
(Ted mutters )

312
00:18:59,607 --> 00:19:01,165
(Congregation mutters )

313
00:19:01,207 --> 00:19:03,583
(Exchange becomes faster and faster)

314
00:19:07,847 --> 00:19:09,644
Right!

315
00:19:20,687 --> 00:19:21,756
Please.

316
00:19:23,007 --> 00:19:23,996
Please.

317
00:19:25,167 --> 00:19:27,806
Please. Please.

318
00:19:28,967 --> 00:19:30,958
–Pl…
–(Tyres screech)

319
00:19:31,007 --> 00:19:33,760
Sorry about that, Father.
Didn't see you.

320
00:19:34,767 --> 00:19:38,442
No problem, Tom.
Could you give me a lift?

321
00:19:38,487 --> 00:19:41,457
–Thanks again for the lift, Tom.
–No problem.

322
00:19:41,487 --> 00:19:43,887
I just have to pop into
the post office.

323
00:19:43,927 --> 00:19:45,804
–It's…
–I'll be a second.

324
00:19:47,567 --> 00:19:50,087
I'm meeting someone.
God, that's heavy.

325
00:19:50,127 --> 00:19:51,606
(Tyres screech)

326
00:19:52,607 --> 00:19:55,644
Won't be long. And you, shut up!

327
00:20:00,767 --> 00:20:02,723
(Gunshots )

328
00:20:03,767 --> 00:20:05,564
(Alarm ringing)

329
00:20:07,647 --> 00:20:10,727
You haven't been up to
your old tricks again, Tom?

330
00:20:10,767 --> 00:20:14,919
No. It's my money, I just didn't
want to fill out the forms.

331
00:20:20,167 --> 00:20:21,566
(Tyres screech)

332
00:20:21,607 --> 00:20:22,801
(Crash)

333
00:20:25,407 --> 00:20:27,523
You came!

334
00:20:29,127 --> 00:20:32,403
Come in and have a drink,
Father Curley.

335
00:20:35,287 --> 00:20:38,563
I think I might have
everything you want in here.

336
00:20:40,527 --> 00:20:42,245
(Jolly music)

337
00:20:43,167 --> 00:20:45,283
Ted! This is great, isn't it?

338
00:20:45,327 --> 00:20:47,045
What are you doing here?

339
00:20:47,087 --> 00:20:49,999
–What? Well, we were invited.
–Invited?

340
00:20:50,047 --> 00:20:53,479
Same as you. Can't have
a house-warming on your own.

341
00:20:53,487 --> 00:20:55,205
No, I suppose not.

342
00:20:55,247 --> 00:20:57,287
Very short Mass tonight, Father.

343
00:20:57,327 --> 00:21:00,759
We were all a bit disappointed.
Weren't we, Sisters?

344
00:21:01,927 --> 00:21:03,927
We might not come back next year.

345
00:21:03,967 --> 00:21:06,927
They say Father Clippit
does a good, long Mass.

346
00:21:06,967 --> 00:21:11,802
Three hours on a good night since
his stroke. That's value for money.

347
00:21:11,847 --> 00:21:16,079
–You see…
–I'm sorry, Father. I'm in a hurry.

348
00:21:16,127 --> 00:21:18,163
How do you get these open?

349
00:21:18,207 --> 00:21:19,606
(Pop )

350
00:21:23,167 --> 00:21:25,556
Bye, Sister. Bye, Sisters.

351
00:21:27,167 --> 00:21:28,759
Now, Father.

352
00:21:28,807 --> 00:21:30,399
(Mumbles )

353
00:21:33,047 --> 00:21:35,885
Father, before you go,
could I have a word?

354
00:21:35,887 --> 00:21:38,007
All right. Dougal, you go on ahead.

355
00:21:38,047 --> 00:21:40,423
–I'll be back in a while.
–Right so.

356
00:21:43,047 --> 00:21:45,959
Would you like me
to put something else on?

357
00:21:46,007 --> 00:21:48,119
No, what you're wearing is fine.

358
00:21:49,447 --> 00:21:52,351
Would you like another drink,
Father Curley?

359
00:21:53,887 --> 00:21:55,036
Yes.

360
00:21:55,087 --> 00:21:57,317
It was nice talking to you today.

361
00:21:57,367 --> 00:22:00,367
If you can't talk to a priest,
who can you talk to?

362
00:22:00,407 --> 00:22:04,287
We're taught how to listen.
Not that we had listening classes.

363
00:22:04,327 --> 00:22:07,407
It's not as if we didn't know
how to listen before.

364
00:22:07,447 --> 00:22:10,607
It's just being there
and somebody talking to you,

365
00:22:10,647 --> 00:22:12,727
which is easy unless you're deaf.

366
00:22:12,767 --> 00:22:15,935
There's not an awful lot
of work involved there.

367
00:22:15,967 --> 00:22:19,357
No swotting for those exams
with the old listening.

368
00:22:23,847 --> 00:22:27,157
Father, d'you remember me telling you

369
00:22:27,207 --> 00:22:30,643
about reaching a crossroads
in my life?

370
00:22:30,687 --> 00:22:32,598
Yes, I do.

371
00:22:32,647 --> 00:22:35,617
What do you think I should do?
I need advice.

372
00:22:41,567 --> 00:22:44,161
You know, Father, that's interesting.

373
00:22:44,207 --> 00:22:48,439
I think one road leads back
to where I was, that's a busy road.

374
00:22:48,487 --> 00:22:52,366
It's filled with people
and bright lights and traffic.

375
00:22:52,407 --> 00:22:54,981
The other road
is a quiet, country road

376
00:22:55,007 --> 00:22:58,920
with peace and serenity
and fulfilment.

377
00:22:58,967 --> 00:23:01,686
–I see.
–Which one would you choose?

378
00:23:01,727 --> 00:23:04,560
Well, it's… That's an easy one.

379
00:23:05,567 --> 00:23:07,637
Yes, I suppose it is obvious.

380
00:23:07,687 --> 00:23:09,757
Bright lights, glamour…

381
00:23:09,807 --> 00:23:12,727
–I was thinking…
–Cocaine parties, drugs, Las Vegas.

382
00:23:12,767 --> 00:23:15,918
–No. Father. Father.
–Sorry.

383
00:23:15,967 --> 00:23:18,356
What I was going to say was,

384
00:23:18,407 --> 00:23:20,967
I know I've made the right choice.

385
00:23:21,007 --> 00:23:23,726
I know you have… Polly.

386
00:23:24,967 --> 00:23:27,720
I'm with you… all the way.

387
00:23:27,767 --> 00:23:30,076
I'm going to become a nun.

388
00:23:33,647 --> 00:23:35,046
Oh, feck!

389
00:23:35,087 --> 00:23:39,683
Feck… fecking marvellous news.

390
00:23:40,167 --> 00:23:43,716
I was talking
to Sister Julia earlier.

391
00:23:43,767 --> 00:23:46,281
You know she's 97 years of age?

392
00:23:46,327 --> 00:23:51,145
Did you ever think what it would be
like to be a 97-year-old nun, Father?

393
00:23:51,927 --> 00:23:52,996
No.

394
00:23:53,047 --> 00:23:54,719
I'll miss Craggy Island.

395
00:23:54,767 --> 00:23:58,919
It's silly, I know.
I've only been here a day. But…

396
00:23:59,967 --> 00:24:02,083
I'll always remember you.

397
00:24:03,127 --> 00:24:07,086
In 20 years' time,
when I'm looking in my prayer book,

398
00:24:07,127 --> 00:24:11,643
I'll probably still be thinking
about Father Ted Curley.

399
00:24:14,207 --> 00:24:15,401
Crilly.

400
00:24:15,447 --> 00:24:16,846
What?

401
00:24:16,887 --> 00:24:19,321
Father Ted Crilly, nice to meet you.

402
00:24:23,527 --> 00:24:25,040
(Laughter)

403
00:24:31,007 --> 00:24:33,840
Oh, no, Dougal. Not again.

404
00:24:33,887 --> 00:24:37,721
Sorry, Ted. I was just looking
for some change.

405
00:24:39,807 --> 00:24:42,275
Oh, well. Back to the everyday grind.

406
00:24:42,327 --> 00:24:43,965
(Jack laughs )