1 00:00:33,164 --> 00:00:35,457 It was a day like no other. 2 00:00:39,128 --> 00:00:41,839 It was a day I had always dreamed of. 3 00:00:42,756 --> 00:00:44,924 A day I would never forget. 4 00:00:47,135 --> 00:00:51,097 Will you marry this woman and take her to your heart, 5 00:00:51,181 --> 00:00:54,017 forever devoted and forever young? 6 00:00:54,100 --> 00:00:55,768 I will. 7 00:00:55,852 --> 00:01:00,440 And will you marry this man and take him to your heart, 8 00:01:00,523 --> 00:01:03,026 forever devoted and forever young? 9 00:01:03,109 --> 00:01:05,069 I will. 10 00:01:05,153 --> 00:01:08,280 Would you now place the ring on her finger? 11 00:01:11,492 --> 00:01:13,160 I now declare... 12 00:01:16,538 --> 00:01:19,458 What a shame we had uninvited guests. 13 00:01:22,336 --> 00:01:25,422 I'll have what I came for this day! 14 00:01:27,925 --> 00:01:29,802 Jack politely asked him to leave. 15 00:01:30,135 --> 00:01:32,011 Kiss steel, bastard! 16 00:01:45,274 --> 00:01:46,984 Jack! 17 00:02:04,042 --> 00:02:06,128 Hold tight! I'm coming! 18 00:02:10,090 --> 00:02:13,135 His temper flared, but he fought like a gentleman. 19 00:02:36,490 --> 00:02:40,995 My one true love had fought bravely, but it wasn't enough. 20 00:02:52,881 --> 00:02:54,966 There was only room for one more. 21 00:02:55,049 --> 00:02:57,635 It was either my love or myself. 22 00:02:57,719 --> 00:03:02,098 - You take it, my love. - Never! Those maggots will not have you. 23 00:03:02,265 --> 00:03:04,893 They will not have me for long. 24 00:03:04,976 --> 00:03:08,270 I have consumption and will be dead before the year is out. 25 00:03:08,353 --> 00:03:12,483 You were gonna marry me with consumption? Why didn't you tell me? 26 00:03:12,566 --> 00:03:14,735 I didn't want to spoil things. 27 00:03:14,818 --> 00:03:16,111 - Go. - No! 28 00:03:16,195 --> 00:03:18,489 Live to fight another day. 29 00:03:22,367 --> 00:03:24,453 Whatever makes you happy. 30 00:03:30,124 --> 00:03:33,461 With Jack, my happiness always came first. 31 00:03:35,254 --> 00:03:37,131 I faced my fate alone. 32 00:03:37,298 --> 00:03:40,343 The 10 turned to 20, the 20 to 40. 33 00:03:40,426 --> 00:03:43,638 Could this be the end of my freedom, my salvation, my... 34 00:03:43,721 --> 00:03:46,432 Hey, gorgeous! 35 00:03:47,225 --> 00:03:49,519 Hiya, Joanie! 36 00:04:03,240 --> 00:04:05,325 What happened? 37 00:04:36,647 --> 00:04:40,608 "Was this the end of my freedom, my salvation?" 38 00:04:43,069 --> 00:04:45,155 My career? 39 00:05:58,099 --> 00:06:00,352 Gorgeous day. Huh, gorgeous? 40 00:06:00,435 --> 00:06:02,854 We got blue skies, 41 00:06:02,938 --> 00:06:06,274 nice warm water and a cold beer. 42 00:06:09,402 --> 00:06:11,279 Honey, did you get any more Buds? 43 00:06:11,363 --> 00:06:16,325 No, I just didn't have time today to ravage the Riviera for your beer. 44 00:06:17,284 --> 00:06:20,621 - Tough day, huh? - Yeah, you could say it was tough. 45 00:06:20,704 --> 00:06:24,333 But then when the going gets tough, the tough... 46 00:06:26,877 --> 00:06:28,754 I don't know what the tough do. 47 00:06:28,838 --> 00:06:31,924 I don't know what the pirates do, or what anybody does. 48 00:06:32,007 --> 00:06:35,511 - Jack... - Oh, honey. I know, baby. I know. 49 00:06:38,638 --> 00:06:41,558 Look out there. What do you see? 50 00:06:42,517 --> 00:06:44,519 - Bloomingdale's? - No. 51 00:06:44,602 --> 00:06:46,062 Greece. 52 00:06:46,146 --> 00:06:49,816 Yeah. Mykonos, Lesbos, ouzo, olive oil. Honey, we're going. 53 00:06:49,899 --> 00:06:53,987 Wait. I thought you said that we were going back to New York for a while. 54 00:06:54,070 --> 00:06:57,031 Absolutely. When the summer's over we're going. 55 00:06:57,115 --> 00:07:01,410 Oh, Jack, we've been on this boat half a year now. I need shore leave. 56 00:07:01,493 --> 00:07:05,080 I promised Gloria I'd finish that book three months ago, and I can't. 57 00:07:05,164 --> 00:07:07,249 I don't know what happens next. 58 00:07:07,332 --> 00:07:10,127 I thought you wanted to sail around the world with me. 59 00:07:10,210 --> 00:07:13,422 Well, I do, but not all of it this week. 60 00:07:13,839 --> 00:07:16,633 I mean, Jack, this is just becoming a blur. 61 00:07:16,717 --> 00:07:21,472 Exotic ports and great parties and spectacular sunsets... 62 00:07:21,555 --> 00:07:23,222 It's not enough. 63 00:07:23,306 --> 00:07:25,558 It's not enough?! 64 00:07:25,641 --> 00:07:29,979 You sound like someone who's got what they wanted and now don't want what they got. 65 00:07:30,062 --> 00:07:33,566 - I wanna do something serious. - Serious? Come on! 66 00:07:33,649 --> 00:07:36,068 How much romance can one woman take? 67 00:07:36,152 --> 00:07:38,446 Joan Wilder? 68 00:07:41,073 --> 00:07:43,576 From your most devoted friend. 69 00:07:44,285 --> 00:07:46,369 Thank you. 70 00:07:52,667 --> 00:07:56,922 "This afternoon we shall meet... awaiting the moment." What's this afternoon? 71 00:07:57,005 --> 00:08:01,843 - Must be somebody coming to the reception. - That's not till next Tuesday. 72 00:08:03,428 --> 00:08:05,931 This is "next Tuesday", Jack. 73 00:08:22,154 --> 00:08:27,201 - Jack, you said you were getting a car. - If I knew it was Tuesday, I would've. Sorry. 74 00:08:27,284 --> 00:08:29,370 That's all right. 75 00:08:29,453 --> 00:08:32,790 Whaddaya say we spin that roulette wheel while we're there? 76 00:08:32,872 --> 00:08:34,958 Sounds great. 77 00:08:44,676 --> 00:08:45,969 Jack. 78 00:08:46,052 --> 00:08:47,929 - Yeah? - She can't leave now. 79 00:08:48,012 --> 00:08:50,807 - Why not? - What do you mean, "Why not?" 80 00:08:50,890 --> 00:08:54,394 - Oh, my God. - I'm your biggest fan! 81 00:08:54,477 --> 00:08:56,812 - I read all your books. - Thank you. 82 00:08:56,895 --> 00:09:01,150 I'm so happy to see you. 83 00:09:01,233 --> 00:09:04,486 - This is my publisher. Gloria Horne. - Oh, your publisher. 84 00:09:05,070 --> 00:09:07,990 - And this is... - You are Mr Wilder? 85 00:09:08,574 --> 00:09:11,410 No, I'm Mr Colton. Jack Colton. 86 00:09:11,493 --> 00:09:13,829 What do you do, Mr Colton? 87 00:09:13,912 --> 00:09:15,998 Casino work. 88 00:09:16,081 --> 00:09:20,668 Yeah. I think I'll go downstairs and punch in. Excuse me, excuse me. 89 00:09:20,751 --> 00:09:23,254 - But... - I'll be back! 90 00:09:24,755 --> 00:09:27,008 God, I've got to have a drink! 91 00:09:27,091 --> 00:09:29,552 Literary functions are not Jack's speed. 92 00:09:29,635 --> 00:09:33,556 I mean, his favourite author is the man who wrote "Pull Tab to Open". 93 00:09:33,639 --> 00:09:37,560 - I am his favourite author. - You saying it's none of my business? 94 00:09:37,643 --> 00:09:40,688 Let me tell you, Jack is not the marrying kind. 95 00:09:40,772 --> 00:09:44,816 I am worried. You're the girl who never gets a book back late to the library. 96 00:09:44,900 --> 00:09:50,071 You are three months past your deadline. What gives? Un scotch, double. 97 00:09:50,155 --> 00:09:55,076 My heart just isn't in it. Romance just doesn't seem real to me any more. 98 00:09:55,160 --> 00:09:59,706 Real? You don't write "real". You write about people that sail off into the sunset. 99 00:09:59,790 --> 00:10:04,503 - And the next day when the sun comes up? - There is no next day in romance. 100 00:10:04,586 --> 00:10:07,922 Stop confusing real life with a romantic novel. 101 00:10:08,297 --> 00:10:11,884 - Joanie, just finish it. - I can't. 102 00:10:11,967 --> 00:10:15,012 After 17 books, I don't know how it ends any more. 103 00:10:15,095 --> 00:10:18,140 Then permit me to tell you. 104 00:10:21,435 --> 00:10:23,521 It doesn't end. 105 00:10:23,604 --> 00:10:27,441 It only begins anew when you journey down the Nile with me. 106 00:10:28,943 --> 00:10:31,653 - Have you got the right woman? - No. 107 00:10:32,862 --> 00:10:37,992 My name is Omar Khalifa and I have travelled 1,000 miles to tell you I need you. 108 00:10:38,076 --> 00:10:40,912 - You sent me the flowers. - They pale by your beauty. 109 00:10:40,995 --> 00:10:42,664 Oh, Mary! 110 00:10:42,747 --> 00:10:46,960 - I read about you. - Yes, I know. Time magazine. 111 00:10:47,043 --> 00:10:51,631 Well, I'm afraid the Western press cannot understand the spirit of my vision. 112 00:10:51,714 --> 00:10:54,633 You are a writer. You can understand. 113 00:10:55,509 --> 00:10:59,138 So, Joan Wilder, you must come and write my story. 114 00:11:00,305 --> 00:11:02,641 I only write romance novels. 115 00:11:02,724 --> 00:11:06,728 Yes. And you haven't finished the one you're working on right now. 116 00:11:07,563 --> 00:11:11,900 You are a gifted storyteller. You create heroes in a world of cynics. 117 00:11:12,151 --> 00:11:16,029 Journey down the Nile with me and I'll give you a chance to record history. 118 00:11:16,113 --> 00:11:18,656 - Come. We must leave today. - Joanie! 119 00:11:19,240 --> 00:11:24,328 In just four nights I will become Emperor, and you will have the exclusive story. 120 00:11:24,412 --> 00:11:27,248 - They have emperors on the Nile? - They do now. 121 00:11:28,124 --> 00:11:30,209 Oh, shit. 122 00:11:50,020 --> 00:11:52,105 So now what are we celebrating? 123 00:11:52,189 --> 00:11:54,691 - The Nile! - Oh, the Nile. 124 00:11:54,900 --> 00:11:56,777 We've been invited to Africa. 125 00:11:57,652 --> 00:11:59,780 Jack Colton, Omar Khalifa. 126 00:12:00,530 --> 00:12:02,824 How do you do? 127 00:12:02,908 --> 00:12:09,079 He's asked me - me - to write his story. It's just what I've always wanted to do! 128 00:12:09,163 --> 00:12:13,501 And now Joan's work will receive the serious attention that it deserves. 129 00:12:13,584 --> 00:12:16,629 And this will be her biggest accomplishment: 130 00:12:16,712 --> 00:12:18,798 My biography. 131 00:12:19,465 --> 00:12:22,968 What's so important there that you have to write the book now? 132 00:12:23,052 --> 00:12:25,554 - Mr Khalifa has... - Omar, please. 133 00:12:26,138 --> 00:12:30,391 Omar has been chosen to unite the tribes of the Nile 134 00:12:30,642 --> 00:12:33,561 and end the strife that has bloodied his land. 135 00:12:33,645 --> 00:12:36,815 He will carry on the work of the missing Great Redeemer. 136 00:12:36,898 --> 00:12:40,777 - You have listened very well. - You got all that in 20 minutes? 137 00:12:42,695 --> 00:12:46,699 As a friend of Miss Wilder's, you are welcome to be my guest also. 138 00:12:47,242 --> 00:12:49,327 - Thank you. - My pleasure. 139 00:12:51,578 --> 00:12:54,123 Could I talk to you for a minute, please? 140 00:12:59,837 --> 00:13:01,922 I thought you wanted to go to New York. 141 00:13:02,005 --> 00:13:04,299 - That's all changed. - That fast? 142 00:13:04,383 --> 00:13:08,679 But to write a biography - it's something important, something real. 143 00:13:08,762 --> 00:13:12,933 - This is what I've been looking for. - Isn't it a little bit over your head? 144 00:13:13,016 --> 00:13:15,518 I think it's a great chance. 145 00:13:15,601 --> 00:13:17,687 So you got your heart set on it? 146 00:13:22,567 --> 00:13:25,027 Mine's set on Greece. 147 00:13:29,532 --> 00:13:31,617 So when are you gonna leave? 148 00:13:32,785 --> 00:13:35,538 Tonight. He has a private jet and... 149 00:13:35,621 --> 00:13:37,914 Oh, he's got a private jet. 150 00:13:40,041 --> 00:13:43,545 - Oh, what the hell. We had a good run. - Oh, Jack, come on. 151 00:13:43,628 --> 00:13:46,423 This is just five or four weeks of research. 152 00:13:46,506 --> 00:13:49,301 Maybe you're right. Maybe we need a break. 153 00:13:49,384 --> 00:13:51,803 It's been kind of tough lately. 154 00:13:51,887 --> 00:13:55,432 Yeah. When the going gets tough, the tough go to Greece. 155 00:13:59,436 --> 00:14:02,688 - Well, I'll write you. - Where? 156 00:14:04,440 --> 00:14:06,233 Yeah. 157 00:14:06,317 --> 00:14:08,194 Where? 158 00:14:20,998 --> 00:14:24,959 I think I'll go down and give that roulette wheel one more chance. 159 00:14:34,969 --> 00:14:37,055 You take care of yourself. 160 00:14:39,557 --> 00:14:41,643 And you stay out of trouble. 161 00:14:52,402 --> 00:14:54,279 Look out for her, will ya? 162 00:14:54,363 --> 00:14:58,575 I can offer you this comfort: She leaves you for a higher purpose. 163 00:15:01,870 --> 00:15:03,747 Yeah. 164 00:15:19,011 --> 00:15:21,097 Free Al-Jawhara! 165 00:15:50,750 --> 00:15:55,046 Don't be frightened. You know, a man of vision has many enemies. 166 00:15:55,130 --> 00:15:59,091 And my destiny is to outsmart them. You see? 167 00:16:00,050 --> 00:16:02,136 Like it? 168 00:16:02,595 --> 00:16:04,930 It's OK. 169 00:16:47,262 --> 00:16:50,474 Well, sweetheart, I guess it's just you and me. 170 00:16:50,557 --> 00:16:53,352 Goddamn it, she was the best time I ever had. 171 00:16:53,727 --> 00:16:56,563 Don't cry, scumbag! I'll keep you company. 172 00:17:00,109 --> 00:17:03,445 Cartagena, Colombia! Long time no... Oh, shit. 173 00:17:03,529 --> 00:17:07,533 - Go ahead. Gimme a reason. Make my year! - Hey, go easy with the gun. 174 00:17:07,616 --> 00:17:12,286 Did you miss me? I missed you. You're all I thought about for six months. 175 00:17:12,537 --> 00:17:17,333 They threw me in a jail filled with rejects from the communicable disease ward. 176 00:17:17,583 --> 00:17:22,338 Every wacko, drippy, open-sored lowlife was in that joint! 177 00:17:22,422 --> 00:17:24,882 All wanting to be my proctologist. 178 00:17:25,133 --> 00:17:28,386 And rats! I'm full of rat bites. 179 00:17:29,554 --> 00:17:34,558 Ten weeks of rabies shots this long and all I thought of was you, Colton. Just you! 180 00:17:34,641 --> 00:17:39,229 Well, I'm flattered, pal. And I'm sorry you had such a tough time. 181 00:17:40,605 --> 00:17:42,566 How about 100 bucks? 182 00:17:42,649 --> 00:17:46,570 I'll give you a one-way ticket to Harp Land! What'd you do with it? 183 00:17:46,653 --> 00:17:49,948 - What are you talking about? - The stone, moron! I'm cocked! 184 00:17:50,031 --> 00:17:54,827 - Let's talk about this like gentlemen. - Gentlemen! Did I tell you I got malaria? 185 00:17:54,910 --> 00:17:59,373 Every time I shake, I shake like this. Know what happens if I shake my trigger finger? 186 00:17:59,457 --> 00:18:03,502 And I feel an attack coming on! Know what happens if that happens? 187 00:18:03,586 --> 00:18:06,422 It's the end of Mr Lucky. That's the end of... 188 00:18:07,006 --> 00:18:09,258 Holy shit! 189 00:18:10,259 --> 00:18:13,596 Quiet! Next time you'll not be so lucky. 190 00:18:13,679 --> 00:18:17,641 - I am Tarak. You must come with me now. - What the hell are you? 191 00:18:17,725 --> 00:18:21,519 - Omar steal our jewel. Al-Jawhara. - Jewel? 192 00:18:21,603 --> 00:18:26,149 You were invited with the woman. You can get into Omar's palace. My people cannot. 193 00:18:26,232 --> 00:18:31,029 - What people? What are you talking about? - You must help me find the Jewel. 194 00:18:31,112 --> 00:18:33,490 - What jewel? - The Jewel of the Nile. 195 00:18:33,573 --> 00:18:36,075 - Our most priceless jewel. - Oh, that jewel. 196 00:18:36,159 --> 00:18:39,913 Omar has stolen my people's jewel. Omar is a very bad man. 197 00:18:39,996 --> 00:18:42,081 Oh, that scum! I spit on him! 198 00:18:42,164 --> 00:18:45,793 Jack, buddy, let's help this nice man get his jewel back. 199 00:18:45,876 --> 00:18:49,463 - Yes. - Look, I don't know where you're from, 200 00:18:49,546 --> 00:18:51,632 but I'm sailing my boat tonight. 201 00:18:51,715 --> 00:18:56,178 No, you must come to help find the Jewel now before Omar kill many people. 202 00:18:56,470 --> 00:19:00,265 As long as Omar have the Jewel, nothing can stop him. 203 00:19:00,349 --> 00:19:04,394 Look, I'm going on the boat. You guys can do what you want. 204 00:19:09,941 --> 00:19:11,818 The boat blew up! 205 00:19:14,195 --> 00:19:16,072 My boat blew up. 206 00:19:16,155 --> 00:19:18,199 The boat blew up! 207 00:19:18,282 --> 00:19:20,368 Everything's gone. 208 00:19:22,578 --> 00:19:26,082 Who are you? The Prince of Darkness? Don't you got any friends? 209 00:19:26,249 --> 00:19:28,333 This is the work of Omar. 210 00:19:29,751 --> 00:19:33,630 - Omar blew up my boat, huh? - Your woman is in danger, too. 211 00:19:33,713 --> 00:19:35,715 I will take you to him. 212 00:19:35,799 --> 00:19:38,301 - I'm coming, too. - The hell you are! 213 00:19:38,885 --> 00:19:41,888 Look, you owe me, Colton. 214 00:19:41,972 --> 00:19:44,683 So wherever you're going, I'm going. 215 00:19:45,976 --> 00:19:48,270 Where we going? 216 00:19:48,353 --> 00:19:49,896 Africa. 217 00:20:20,467 --> 00:20:23,720 - Do you recognise my home? - I wrote this! 218 00:20:23,803 --> 00:20:29,058 Yes! In The Return of the King. I had the same uniforms designed. 219 00:20:41,653 --> 00:20:43,947 Hello. Hi! 220 00:20:47,034 --> 00:20:50,412 - Is all this yours? - It belongs to the country. To my people. 221 00:20:50,496 --> 00:20:52,372 Oh. 222 00:20:57,419 --> 00:20:59,546 Why point out the negative? 223 00:20:59,630 --> 00:21:02,673 In three nights in Kadir the moon will be full, 224 00:21:02,757 --> 00:21:08,262 and all my people will unite behind me in peace and none of this will be necessary. 225 00:21:08,346 --> 00:21:12,809 - Now let me show you my humble house. - Thank you. 226 00:21:18,940 --> 00:21:21,400 I'm really blessed. My people love me. 227 00:21:21,484 --> 00:21:25,153 Well, yes. They seem very... enthusiastic. 228 00:21:31,785 --> 00:21:36,373 Oh, this is a good shot for you - the little boy holding up my picture. 229 00:21:36,456 --> 00:21:38,542 Oh, yeah, that's wonderful. 230 00:22:00,646 --> 00:22:02,314 My humble house. 231 00:22:02,398 --> 00:22:05,025 You must forgive us. We are a poor people. 232 00:22:14,951 --> 00:22:17,579 Everything you need, they will bring you. 233 00:22:17,662 --> 00:22:19,122 Oh, thank you. 234 00:22:19,205 --> 00:22:23,209 Here only strangers say thank you. Family and friends have no need. 235 00:22:25,170 --> 00:22:27,172 What was that? 236 00:22:27,255 --> 00:22:29,340 Cats. Come. 237 00:22:31,676 --> 00:22:33,344 I have a cat. 238 00:22:40,934 --> 00:22:43,020 I hope this is satisfactory. 239 00:22:44,563 --> 00:22:47,858 Oh, yes, this is OK. Fine. 240 00:22:47,941 --> 00:22:50,486 Here you'll write your masterpiece. 241 00:22:50,569 --> 00:22:52,780 Ah, I have a few questions... 242 00:22:52,863 --> 00:22:56,366 I see the writer is already at work. Good. 243 00:22:57,451 --> 00:22:59,869 Explore your new world. 244 00:22:59,952 --> 00:23:03,372 Feel free to go anywhere and see anything. 245 00:23:03,706 --> 00:23:05,792 Talk to anyone. 246 00:23:06,375 --> 00:23:10,129 I'm glad you're here, Joan. Together we'll make history. 247 00:24:07,643 --> 00:24:09,728 It's like a fishbowl! 248 00:24:09,811 --> 00:24:14,399 Why do these Third World cesspools always gotta be so hot, will you tell me that? 249 00:24:16,651 --> 00:24:18,737 Hey, where the hell you going? 250 00:24:24,200 --> 00:24:26,286 Holy shit! 251 00:24:43,385 --> 00:24:47,973 Well, Colton, looks like we've hitched our wagon to a star. 252 00:25:16,918 --> 00:25:19,003 Stop that! Stop it! 253 00:25:27,677 --> 00:25:29,763 Excuse me? 254 00:25:30,847 --> 00:25:33,308 What does this mean? 255 00:25:37,396 --> 00:25:40,649 - Do you speak English? - "Give back the Jewel." 256 00:25:41,233 --> 00:25:44,735 - Give back the jewel? - Yeah. Eid lana Al-Jawhara. 257 00:25:49,615 --> 00:25:52,118 You can't do that! I'm a professional. 258 00:26:00,960 --> 00:26:03,045 We'll see about that. 259 00:26:04,964 --> 00:26:08,341 If you don't tell me what the hell is going on here, 260 00:26:08,425 --> 00:26:12,637 - I'll be on the first plane back to New York. - It's impossible. 261 00:26:13,221 --> 00:26:18,309 Tomorrow we journey to Kadir. You must be there. It will be your most important chapter. 262 00:26:18,393 --> 00:26:22,439 - I can't write if you keep secrets from me. - What secrets? 263 00:26:25,275 --> 00:26:27,360 What is the Jewel? 264 00:26:29,653 --> 00:26:31,989 The Jewel is a legend. 265 00:26:32,072 --> 00:26:34,158 I am real. 266 00:26:34,742 --> 00:26:38,162 Do not be distracted from your mission, Joan Wilder. 267 00:26:38,871 --> 00:26:40,956 Make yourself comfortable. 268 00:26:41,498 --> 00:26:44,460 You stay with me until our book is done. 269 00:26:44,543 --> 00:26:46,628 You can't keep me here! 270 00:26:49,381 --> 00:26:51,467 Go. You are free to leave. 271 00:26:54,677 --> 00:26:58,806 Only the worst kind of fool would attempt our desert alone. 272 00:27:09,150 --> 00:27:13,404 I gotta get off this camel. It's breaking my ass! Colton! 273 00:27:13,488 --> 00:27:16,073 - You gotta hang on and take it. - I can't. 274 00:27:16,156 --> 00:27:19,618 - The camp's coming up. - Shit! 275 00:27:34,925 --> 00:27:37,010 You are welcome! 276 00:27:38,637 --> 00:27:41,263 We have food! We have drink! 277 00:27:41,347 --> 00:27:43,432 You got a toilet? 278 00:27:48,312 --> 00:27:50,606 So how big is this jewel? 279 00:27:56,320 --> 00:27:59,407 Very, very big. Very big. Very, very big. 280 00:27:59,490 --> 00:28:00,658 Very big. 281 00:28:01,826 --> 00:28:04,536 It's as big as this orange? 282 00:28:12,293 --> 00:28:16,172 - It's as big as an orange. - The Jewel is the heart of our people. 283 00:28:16,339 --> 00:28:18,758 Omar steals the heart of our people. 284 00:28:18,842 --> 00:28:21,136 - Omar is thief. - Omar is very bad man. 285 00:28:21,469 --> 00:28:24,472 Before Omar steal Jewel, everything good. 286 00:28:24,556 --> 00:28:26,473 Now everything is shit! 287 00:28:35,107 --> 00:28:39,862 You help us find the Jewel, and we give you great reward. 288 00:28:39,945 --> 00:28:43,282 But if you lie to us, you die. 289 00:28:45,033 --> 00:28:46,994 But now we dance! 290 00:29:21,985 --> 00:29:24,071 Look at these guys, Colton. 291 00:29:24,154 --> 00:29:26,239 No sheep is safe tonight. 292 00:29:37,666 --> 00:29:41,504 We split it right down the middle, Colton. 50-50. 293 00:29:41,587 --> 00:29:43,672 What are you talking about? 294 00:29:43,756 --> 00:29:46,300 Don't play stupid with me, partner. 295 00:29:46,384 --> 00:29:48,260 The Jewel. 296 00:29:48,344 --> 00:29:51,138 And don't you even think of messing with me. 297 00:29:56,811 --> 00:30:00,730 Oh, what's that I hear? A heart breaking? You sap! 298 00:30:00,814 --> 00:30:02,690 Keep your mind on business. 299 00:30:02,774 --> 00:30:07,362 You'll wind up getting yourself killed over some broad who dumped you. 300 00:30:09,239 --> 00:30:10,907 Jewels! 301 00:30:10,990 --> 00:30:13,326 Oh, Omar! 302 00:30:42,020 --> 00:30:44,565 I want you lot to be careful! 303 00:30:45,315 --> 00:30:50,445 See that word "Fragile" on the side? It means don't drop... Why don't you listen? 304 00:30:50,528 --> 00:30:55,283 I might love your country, your culture, and even your people! That means I love you! 305 00:30:55,366 --> 00:30:59,162 But you drop one more of my boxes, and I'll smash your bloody face in! 306 00:31:01,581 --> 00:31:06,627 You tell Omar, right - Omar - that his special-effects wizard has arrived! 307 00:31:06,711 --> 00:31:08,796 Come on, then. 308 00:32:35,045 --> 00:32:37,923 War plans? Oh, my God! What is he up to? 309 00:32:43,470 --> 00:32:46,222 Wait till Time magazine sees this. 310 00:33:10,704 --> 00:33:13,206 You bastard! You burnt my hand! 311 00:33:13,290 --> 00:33:18,253 I didn't say it wouldn't burn. I said it wouldn't hurt! There's no blistering. 312 00:33:18,336 --> 00:33:22,841 - I've done it hundreds of times on stage. - This is not a cheap theatrical stunt! 313 00:33:22,924 --> 00:33:28,221 - It's a miracle! My people have to believe it! - Omar, trust me. Trust what I've got to say. 314 00:33:28,305 --> 00:33:33,267 Look, if I can make gods out of rock'n'roll stars, imagine what I can do for you. 315 00:33:33,350 --> 00:33:37,313 For your information, I am not a rock'n'roll star! 316 00:33:37,396 --> 00:33:40,691 The people must believe I have the same powers as the Jewel. 317 00:33:40,775 --> 00:33:43,110 Come! I want to see him now. 318 00:33:43,194 --> 00:33:47,406 If it weren't for the Jewel, I'd have led my people to power long ago. 319 00:33:56,790 --> 00:34:01,836 Westerners understand nothing. The Jewel represents the spiritual world of my people. 320 00:34:01,920 --> 00:34:06,508 Unless I convince them I am their spiritual leader, they will never follow me into battle. 321 00:34:06,591 --> 00:34:08,676 That is why you are here. 322 00:34:33,617 --> 00:34:37,746 - Tell me how it's done, magician. - It's not magic trick. It's miracle. 323 00:34:39,039 --> 00:34:41,416 I am losing patience with you. 324 00:34:41,499 --> 00:34:45,461 But you cannot kill me. Even you are superstitious. 325 00:34:45,545 --> 00:34:48,214 Al-Jawhara lives. 326 00:34:48,297 --> 00:34:51,384 Two nights from now it will not matter. 327 00:35:06,982 --> 00:35:08,984 Oh, no. 328 00:35:13,321 --> 00:35:15,323 A woman? 329 00:35:15,574 --> 00:35:18,618 - Most unexpected. - I gotta get outta here. 330 00:35:18,702 --> 00:35:20,787 I gotta stop Omar. 331 00:35:21,038 --> 00:35:23,832 Did you bring an army? 332 00:35:23,915 --> 00:35:28,127 - No. I'm just Joan Wilder. - Just-Joan Wilder, I'm Al-Jawhara. 333 00:35:30,921 --> 00:35:33,382 The Jewel of the Nile. 334 00:35:33,716 --> 00:35:36,052 I don't understand. 335 00:35:36,135 --> 00:35:39,513 - You are the Jewel?! - Yes. For the moment. 336 00:35:39,597 --> 00:35:44,518 In two nights at the holy city of Kadir Omar will proclaim himself Emperor. 337 00:35:44,602 --> 00:35:48,647 Without me to oppose him, he'll march across North Africa like a madman. 338 00:35:50,274 --> 00:35:53,109 But the world will see me as the saviour of my people. 339 00:35:53,193 --> 00:35:58,073 No, it won't. The world won't believe you. I've been in your office and seen your vision. 340 00:35:58,156 --> 00:36:00,533 - I'll write the truth about you. - The truth? 341 00:36:00,867 --> 00:36:03,912 If I wanted the truth, I would have hired 60 Minutes. 342 00:36:03,995 --> 00:36:07,040 What do you know about truth? You fantasise everything. 343 00:36:07,123 --> 00:36:12,545 Why do you think I brought you here? You stay here and write what I tell you to write! 344 00:36:14,172 --> 00:36:18,342 - You think no one knows I'm here? - Oh, yes, Jack! I forgot to tell you. 345 00:36:18,634 --> 00:36:21,136 Jack is dead. 346 00:36:22,096 --> 00:36:25,933 Don't be ridiculous. Jack would never die without telling me. 347 00:36:26,266 --> 00:36:28,352 Nevertheless, he is dead. 348 00:36:35,275 --> 00:36:39,946 You look pale, Miss Wilder. I'll send you my personal physician. 349 00:36:46,327 --> 00:36:48,746 It can't be true. 350 00:36:54,210 --> 00:36:57,880 This Jack... He is friend for you? 351 00:36:59,382 --> 00:37:01,133 Yes. 352 00:37:01,216 --> 00:37:03,301 He is my best friend. 353 00:37:16,231 --> 00:37:18,734 What? I don't see shit! 354 00:37:19,901 --> 00:37:21,903 We must stop here. 355 00:37:21,987 --> 00:37:25,031 It is dangerous for Sufis to enter Omar's city. 356 00:37:25,614 --> 00:37:28,325 Now, wait. He's already tried to kill me once. 357 00:37:30,494 --> 00:37:32,788 You are guest of Omar. 358 00:37:33,372 --> 00:37:36,500 Find for us the Jewel. Accept your destiny. 359 00:37:37,960 --> 00:37:40,838 Destiny, my ass! Excuse me. 360 00:37:42,006 --> 00:37:44,759 When you hook up with jujubes, see what happens. 361 00:37:44,842 --> 00:37:47,803 Just take your lead from me, and we'll be fine. 362 00:37:49,262 --> 00:37:53,725 - We gonna walk through the centre of town? - I'm gonna put you up a camel's ass. 363 00:37:53,808 --> 00:37:55,477 I might like it. 364 00:38:01,107 --> 00:38:03,693 - What are you doing? - In one of my books, 365 00:38:03,777 --> 00:38:05,862 Angelina's Savage Secret, 366 00:38:05,945 --> 00:38:10,617 she used her nailfile to cut the mortar away from the window box. 367 00:38:11,159 --> 00:38:13,285 How long did this take? 368 00:38:13,369 --> 00:38:15,329 Two pages. 369 00:38:15,412 --> 00:38:20,042 But... it's not the bars that make the prison. It is the desert. 370 00:38:20,125 --> 00:38:23,962 So I'll travel at night. I don't care. I have to stop Omar. 371 00:38:24,046 --> 00:38:26,799 I gotta get out to write the truth about him. 372 00:38:26,882 --> 00:38:28,967 I have to get to Kadir. 373 00:38:29,510 --> 00:38:32,971 Wait a minute. You are the one that has to get to Kadir. 374 00:38:33,055 --> 00:38:36,391 You are the only one that can stop Omar. You have to go with me! 375 00:38:39,143 --> 00:38:41,437 Maybe you are the one. 376 00:38:43,523 --> 00:38:44,982 I accept. 377 00:38:45,358 --> 00:38:47,443 We are sworn, Just-Joan. 378 00:38:49,487 --> 00:38:52,782 - Right. But it's just Joan. - Right. Just-Joan. 379 00:38:52,865 --> 00:38:56,536 - Right. We just have to get out this window. - Please. 380 00:39:01,790 --> 00:39:04,710 - Magic! - Dry rot. 381 00:39:06,753 --> 00:39:12,801 I bet you could pick up a swell three-bedroom town house here for about five or six dollars. 382 00:39:15,762 --> 00:39:17,514 Hi. My name is Colton. 383 00:39:17,597 --> 00:39:21,309 I've been invited by your Omar. I'm here to see Joan Wilder. 384 00:39:24,145 --> 00:39:26,647 Hey, Rachid! How are you? Good to see you again. 385 00:39:26,731 --> 00:39:28,941 Joan Wilder does not want to see you. 386 00:39:33,237 --> 00:39:36,449 Well, now, Rachid, I don't think you understand. 387 00:39:38,034 --> 00:39:42,538 We're here on official business. This is Mr... Fatush from the US Embassy. 388 00:39:42,621 --> 00:39:46,750 He's got something very important to talk to all you guys about. 389 00:39:51,129 --> 00:39:54,466 Look, we don't want to create an international incident here. 390 00:39:54,549 --> 00:39:57,677 I mean, after all, she is an American citizen. 391 00:39:57,761 --> 00:40:01,931 If you'll just let us see her, no paperwork. Mum's the word. Everything... 392 00:40:04,476 --> 00:40:07,979 Guys, no sweat, OK? We'll catch you next time we're in town. 393 00:40:08,063 --> 00:40:10,397 - Take it easy. - Say hello to her for us. 394 00:40:10,481 --> 00:40:14,234 You know what they say: Once they've had a holy man, they never go back. 395 00:40:14,818 --> 00:40:19,031 - Quickly, Just-Joan! - Are you sure you know where you're going? 396 00:40:24,286 --> 00:40:27,331 Those guys can go for hours without coming up for air. 397 00:40:27,414 --> 00:40:31,502 Ease up, will ya? All right, there's gotta be another way in here. 398 00:40:31,585 --> 00:40:37,423 I can't wait for another smooth move. How about us at the back door in pussycat suits? 399 00:40:37,507 --> 00:40:41,386 - When they come with the milk... - How about you takin' it in the ear!? 400 00:40:41,469 --> 00:40:44,681 Look, if it wasn't for me, you wouldn't be on to this. 401 00:40:44,889 --> 00:40:47,809 Subsequently I should shoot you the first chance I get! 402 00:40:47,892 --> 00:40:49,435 Jack! 403 00:40:49,852 --> 00:40:51,938 You're alive! 404 00:40:52,021 --> 00:40:54,190 Kinda goin' outta your way to duck me! 405 00:40:54,273 --> 00:40:56,650 You bastard! 406 00:41:05,242 --> 00:41:08,120 Oh, Jack! I thought I'd never see you again. 407 00:41:08,203 --> 00:41:12,165 They told me you were dead. I never wanna feel that way again. 408 00:41:12,624 --> 00:41:15,419 Does this mean you apologise? 409 00:41:15,502 --> 00:41:19,672 I feel like I'm back in eighth grade. Is this The Young and the Stupid? 410 00:41:19,755 --> 00:41:24,135 - What the hell is he doing here? - Don't get cagey with me. I'm on to it. 411 00:41:24,218 --> 00:41:26,303 I know how you two operate. 412 00:41:28,723 --> 00:41:31,851 I'll get in there with or without you dinks! 413 00:41:40,651 --> 00:41:45,739 Hey, look, guys! Lighten up! I'm only saying hello to an old girlfriend here! 414 00:41:45,822 --> 00:41:49,576 - Just-Joan, we need to go! - Wait a minute, who's this guy? 415 00:41:49,659 --> 00:41:52,996 - He's a friend. - You made friends in there? 416 00:42:09,303 --> 00:42:12,264 - OK. Let's go, come on! - Wait. He's coming with us. 417 00:42:13,432 --> 00:42:17,227 Don't start with me! I've come halfway across Africa to rescue you. 418 00:42:17,311 --> 00:42:20,105 Rescue me? I was doing fine without you. 419 00:42:21,899 --> 00:42:25,235 - I am guide. I can help. - I don't need a guide. I need a miracle! 420 00:42:25,319 --> 00:42:27,404 Jack, he's coming with us. 421 00:42:31,199 --> 00:42:35,495 All right. But if we get out of this alive, I'm gonna kill you. 422 00:42:35,578 --> 00:42:37,038 Let's go. 423 00:43:11,822 --> 00:43:14,408 - Who are you? - Is this where Al Jolson's buried? 424 00:43:14,491 --> 00:43:17,243 - Who the hell are you? - Don't provoke me, pal! 425 00:43:17,326 --> 00:43:21,914 I had a tough day. You know how hot it is here? It's 120� in the shade. 426 00:43:24,041 --> 00:43:27,420 I'm like this with Weinberger. We'll be all over you! 427 00:43:35,386 --> 00:43:37,263 Let me in! 428 00:43:39,347 --> 00:43:41,474 Holy shit and shove me in it. 429 00:44:13,839 --> 00:44:15,924 Oh, no. Over the wall! 430 00:44:49,790 --> 00:44:52,167 Excuse me. Excuse me. 431 00:44:56,046 --> 00:44:57,923 Come on! 432 00:44:58,006 --> 00:44:59,675 No! No! 433 00:45:04,346 --> 00:45:07,391 OK, flyboy, your estimated time of departure is now! 434 00:45:26,117 --> 00:45:29,078 - What are you doing? - I'm not doing anything! 435 00:45:30,121 --> 00:45:33,708 - Well, do something! - All right. I'm trying! 436 00:45:36,876 --> 00:45:39,254 I mean, this isn't Space Invaders! 437 00:45:45,343 --> 00:45:48,263 - Jack, the wall! - Oh, no! 438 00:46:28,676 --> 00:46:32,847 - It is Space Invaders! - That'll show 'em! 439 00:46:42,607 --> 00:46:44,525 All right, yeah! 440 00:46:45,276 --> 00:46:47,986 Oh, shit! 441 00:46:50,155 --> 00:46:52,240 Let's get outta here! 442 00:47:07,923 --> 00:47:10,007 This is gonna be tight! 443 00:47:14,929 --> 00:47:17,181 This is my first time in airplane. 444 00:47:29,860 --> 00:47:32,196 How do you stop this thing? 445 00:47:38,535 --> 00:47:40,412 Sorry! 446 00:47:48,670 --> 00:47:51,506 - Do you know where you're going? - Give me a break! 447 00:48:36,382 --> 00:48:39,218 - Your friend steal the Jewel. - What? 448 00:48:43,889 --> 00:48:46,975 - You! You are liar to me! - No! 449 00:48:47,434 --> 00:48:49,728 I come back and you're dead! 450 00:48:54,733 --> 00:48:57,903 You thieving bastard! You ain't stiffin' me again! 451 00:48:57,986 --> 00:49:01,365 I promise ya. I'll feed ya to the maggots! I'll get... 452 00:50:00,963 --> 00:50:02,840 Great! We're out of quarters. 453 00:50:02,923 --> 00:50:05,050 Well, try that one there. 454 00:50:10,639 --> 00:50:12,725 Now what? 455 00:50:13,183 --> 00:50:15,269 Damn it! 456 00:50:25,028 --> 00:50:26,779 Yes! 457 00:50:27,613 --> 00:50:30,283 Hey, that's not bad for your first time. 458 00:51:04,649 --> 00:51:06,776 Come on, we'll get him. We'll get him. 459 00:51:06,859 --> 00:51:09,403 Colton, you ain't gettin' away. 460 00:51:30,340 --> 00:51:32,425 Where the hell's the horn? 461 00:51:33,677 --> 00:51:36,429 Get outta here! Get out of the way! 462 00:51:54,613 --> 00:51:56,073 Sandstorm. 463 00:52:06,041 --> 00:52:08,627 Stop! 464 00:52:09,003 --> 00:52:11,380 What are you gonna do? 465 00:52:12,923 --> 00:52:15,508 Either save us or kill us. Hang on! 466 00:53:16,734 --> 00:53:19,695 - Now you are dead. - No! Don't cut off my head! 467 00:53:19,779 --> 00:53:23,823 - You stole our jewel. - It was the mook! He's always screwin' me. 468 00:53:23,907 --> 00:53:26,868 I swear to God on my eyes I never seen that jewel! 469 00:53:28,495 --> 00:53:31,122 No, wait, wait! 470 00:53:31,206 --> 00:53:33,750 You need me. I can help you find him. 471 00:53:33,833 --> 00:53:38,755 - You are his friend. - No! No friend. Stop saying that. 472 00:53:38,838 --> 00:53:41,174 Friends don't stab each other in the back. 473 00:53:41,257 --> 00:53:45,887 Come on. Look, we'll team up. We'll find him, we'll get him good. 474 00:53:45,970 --> 00:53:50,265 He knows that I will not be denied! Colton's future is bleak! 475 00:53:50,933 --> 00:53:53,018 Very bleak! 476 00:53:55,980 --> 00:53:57,856 Any idea where we are? 477 00:53:57,940 --> 00:54:02,903 The best I can figure out is that we head due east. We should make it to the border. 478 00:54:02,987 --> 00:54:08,575 - Well... is that the way to Kadir? - La. Kadir is in the west, over that mountain. 479 00:54:08,701 --> 00:54:12,245 Well, the best of luck to you, pal. Joan, let's get going. 480 00:54:12,328 --> 00:54:14,497 Jack, we have to take him to Kadir. 481 00:54:15,790 --> 00:54:19,252 What are you talkin' about? We got him out, like you said. Come on. 482 00:54:19,335 --> 00:54:22,463 We swore an oath, Just-Joan and I. We go to Kadir. 483 00:54:23,965 --> 00:54:26,467 What is it with you?! 484 00:54:26,551 --> 00:54:31,264 Jesus! Everything's always gotta be your way? It's just like the goddamn boat! 485 00:54:31,347 --> 00:54:35,767 What do you mean "my way"? It wasn't my idea to spend six months on your boat! 486 00:54:35,851 --> 00:54:40,314 - Oh, debate good. I enjoy. - OK, let me tell you what I put up with. 487 00:54:40,689 --> 00:54:44,943 We're moored off the Canary Islands. Midnight, sound asleep. 488 00:54:45,027 --> 00:54:47,654 Three crazed Joan Wilder fans 489 00:54:47,738 --> 00:54:51,199 decide they want the anchor of the Angelina for a souvenir! 490 00:54:51,283 --> 00:54:56,705 - We were drifting for days! And the other... - Stop. I'm sorry. It's time for Just-Joan. 491 00:54:56,788 --> 00:54:59,957 - Remember the Costa del Sol, Jack? - Oh, come on! 492 00:55:00,041 --> 00:55:02,877 He's gotta meet me at the governor's for dinner. 493 00:55:02,960 --> 00:55:07,923 And you show up with the entire national basketball team! 494 00:55:08,007 --> 00:55:09,884 They were hungry. 495 00:55:09,967 --> 00:55:13,596 This is what I'm talking about. Sometimes you could think about me. 496 00:55:13,679 --> 00:55:17,933 Oh, I suppose you were thinking all about me when you took off with Omar? 497 00:55:18,017 --> 00:55:20,102 - He blew up my boat! - Our boat? 498 00:55:20,186 --> 00:55:24,064 - Oh, now it's our boat? - Good debate. It's equal, no winners. 499 00:55:24,147 --> 00:55:27,442 - Just-Joan, we must hurry. - Wait. He blew up our boat? 500 00:55:27,525 --> 00:55:30,779 Why are you risking your life for this guy? 501 00:55:32,113 --> 00:55:35,950 I made a commitment. I can't break it. 502 00:55:39,829 --> 00:55:42,499 OK. Fine. 503 00:55:42,582 --> 00:55:46,377 But I'm gonna tell you the truth. I didn't come here for you anyway. No! 504 00:55:46,460 --> 00:55:49,546 I'm on to something big. 505 00:55:50,172 --> 00:55:55,177 - A jewel. The Jewel of the Nile. - Come with us. I am Jawhara! 506 00:55:56,178 --> 00:55:59,473 - That means Joe. - Thanks, Joe, but no thanks. 507 00:55:59,932 --> 00:56:02,935 I wouldn't want her to break her commitment. 508 00:56:03,644 --> 00:56:05,729 Oh, Jack... 509 00:56:06,146 --> 00:56:08,231 Come on. 510 00:56:46,518 --> 00:56:48,603 That's for the Angelina. 511 00:56:49,730 --> 00:56:51,815 I still owe you for Joan. 512 00:56:55,401 --> 00:57:00,072 Oh, no. Oh, God. Please, let me get out of this alive. 513 00:57:00,197 --> 00:57:04,201 I swear to God I'll be a good boy from tomorrow on. 514 00:57:09,707 --> 00:57:11,792 But tonight I gotta kill Colton. 515 00:57:25,597 --> 00:57:28,016 Heydi Joan Wilder! 516 00:57:42,112 --> 00:57:45,866 - Why you didn't tell your friend about me? - Oh, I know him. 517 00:57:46,450 --> 00:57:50,913 He'd go halfway round the world for a party. He wouldn't cross town for a noble cause. 518 00:57:50,996 --> 00:57:54,958 - People can surprise you. - No, he's just Jack. He'll never change. 519 00:57:55,042 --> 00:57:57,127 Like a... 520 00:57:57,711 --> 00:57:59,838 Like a stone. 521 00:57:59,922 --> 00:58:03,676 It's always a stone. Open your hand. 522 00:58:04,926 --> 00:58:08,179 Change is not always visible. 523 00:58:08,346 --> 00:58:11,516 - Let's show some hustle! - What? 524 00:58:11,599 --> 00:58:15,561 Your buddy Omar! What is it? He can't live without you? 525 00:58:19,399 --> 00:58:22,235 - Are we jogging? - We are jogging. 526 00:58:34,997 --> 00:58:37,499 Greece is looking better and better. 527 00:58:46,550 --> 00:58:48,635 Oh, shit! 528 00:58:50,095 --> 00:58:53,014 Just tell me why this guy wants you so bad. 529 00:58:53,931 --> 00:58:56,392 - Hey, Joe, where you going? - This way. 530 00:58:56,475 --> 00:58:59,812 - You gotta be kidding. - He knows the mountains better than you. 531 00:58:59,895 --> 00:59:01,981 Joan, will you give me a break? 532 00:59:02,064 --> 00:59:04,483 America - democracy. We vote, huh? 533 00:59:58,994 --> 01:00:01,080 Stop! 534 01:00:13,091 --> 01:00:15,176 Hurry up. Let's go! 535 01:00:16,094 --> 01:00:17,345 Get down! 536 01:00:21,599 --> 01:00:23,685 It's a black day for democracy. 537 01:00:25,102 --> 01:00:29,147 - Do not worry. It's not my destiny to die here. - What about us? 538 01:00:30,399 --> 01:00:32,943 That's another ball game. 539 01:00:41,910 --> 01:00:44,121 Rachid! 540 01:00:48,125 --> 01:00:50,334 Joan Wilder! 541 01:00:50,418 --> 01:00:52,795 I wish no harm to you! 542 01:00:53,212 --> 01:00:55,798 I'm your friend! Your fan! 543 01:00:56,340 --> 01:00:58,551 Please surrender! 544 01:00:58,634 --> 01:01:02,805 What did you do for this guy Omar you never did for me? 545 01:01:02,888 --> 01:01:04,974 Bloody bitch! 546 01:01:14,691 --> 01:01:16,776 Oh, shit! Look out! 547 01:01:48,974 --> 01:01:51,143 Hey, Omar! Eat rocks! 548 01:01:53,062 --> 01:01:54,563 Let's go. 549 01:02:23,340 --> 01:02:25,425 I got something. 550 01:02:29,513 --> 01:02:31,682 Nubians. 551 01:02:31,765 --> 01:02:34,101 I was hoping to avoid them. 552 01:02:41,149 --> 01:02:43,235 Sell any books here? 553 01:02:46,570 --> 01:02:50,241 - Main man! Hey, my man! - What are you so happy about? 554 01:02:50,324 --> 01:02:54,578 Just keep smiling. Maybe they'll think we're from National Geographic. 555 01:03:00,751 --> 01:03:02,837 Hey! How ya doin'? 556 01:03:34,074 --> 01:03:37,202 He says it's many days' long trip over high mountains. 557 01:03:37,286 --> 01:03:39,913 And he wishes us a very pleasant journey. 558 01:03:41,999 --> 01:03:44,335 Thank you. 559 01:03:44,418 --> 01:03:48,547 All right. Thank you, guys. Catch you next time. Goodbye. 560 01:03:48,631 --> 01:03:50,716 Come on, Jack. 561 01:03:53,427 --> 01:03:59,641 Ah, Mr Jack! Just-Joan! The Chief's son, he wishes to make a blessing for your marriage. 562 01:04:01,768 --> 01:04:04,228 We're not married. 563 01:04:24,873 --> 01:04:30,170 He says, because you are not married, that his son wishes to court you. 564 01:04:30,587 --> 01:04:33,090 - Oh, I just... - Oh, no, that's... 565 01:04:34,132 --> 01:04:38,428 That's very nice, but the lady is... She's with me. 566 01:04:44,642 --> 01:04:49,939 He says that because there is more than one suitor, that you must wrestle his son. 567 01:04:50,273 --> 01:04:52,358 I gotta wrestle his son? 568 01:04:57,446 --> 01:04:59,532 How ya doin'? 569 01:05:03,160 --> 01:05:05,246 OK. This one I think I can handle. 570 01:05:05,912 --> 01:05:07,789 OK! 571 01:05:12,627 --> 01:05:13,878 No? 572 01:05:14,462 --> 01:05:16,548 Hussein! 573 01:05:36,483 --> 01:05:40,237 Wait a minute, guys. Let's talk this over like gentlemen! 574 01:05:42,823 --> 01:05:45,284 All right. You guys are with me, huh? 575 01:05:45,367 --> 01:05:47,328 Yeah, me. All right. 576 01:05:47,411 --> 01:05:51,415 Do me a favour. Tell him we lived together for six months. Shit. 577 01:05:51,498 --> 01:05:53,833 All right, what are the rules? 578 01:06:18,315 --> 01:06:20,484 Right. 579 01:06:32,079 --> 01:06:34,081 I'm sorry about that. 580 01:06:36,833 --> 01:06:39,086 No, not the left one! No! 581 01:06:43,172 --> 01:06:46,050 No pain, no gain. 582 01:06:46,133 --> 01:06:48,219 Let me go! 583 01:06:54,767 --> 01:06:56,852 - No! - Can we talk about this? 584 01:06:57,812 --> 01:06:59,897 Stop it! 585 01:07:00,398 --> 01:07:02,483 We have to do something! 586 01:07:03,191 --> 01:07:05,277 I am doing something. 587 01:07:26,422 --> 01:07:28,507 Joe, he's... 588 01:08:32,152 --> 01:08:36,405 - That was great! - Great, huh? I could've gotten killed! 589 01:09:32,960 --> 01:09:37,506 This is the marriage dance. In this tribe, the women, they choose the man. 590 01:09:37,881 --> 01:09:42,303 And then, according to the custom, they will be together for life. 591 01:09:42,386 --> 01:09:44,763 They get all that from one dance? 592 01:09:44,847 --> 01:09:46,515 It's beautiful! 593 01:09:51,978 --> 01:09:56,774 Ralph, if you want to be one of us, take off your shoes and socks. 594 01:09:57,609 --> 01:10:01,362 If you want to be one of us, you must see with the eyes of your heart, 595 01:10:01,446 --> 01:10:04,240 - not with the eyes of your head. - Gotcha, yeah. 596 01:10:04,324 --> 01:10:07,577 Your heart will never give you fear or pain - 597 01:10:07,660 --> 01:10:09,746 if you know our way. 598 01:10:11,913 --> 01:10:13,582 Ralph. 599 01:10:13,665 --> 01:10:17,002 No, thanks, pal. Keep your friggin' jewel. 600 01:10:17,085 --> 01:10:19,171 - No! - Are you afraid? 601 01:10:20,088 --> 01:10:21,965 I just had my feet resoled. 602 01:10:22,257 --> 01:10:26,428 - What is the worst that can happen to you? - I could wind up a Chicken McNugget. 603 01:10:26,511 --> 01:10:32,392 - What is the best that could happen to you? - I could get through this and find the Jewel. 604 01:10:32,476 --> 01:10:34,560 It's your choice. 605 01:10:34,644 --> 01:10:36,729 Look down. 606 01:10:40,650 --> 01:10:42,318 Hot coals! 607 01:10:46,030 --> 01:10:48,157 I did it! I did it! I'm one of us! 608 01:11:15,684 --> 01:11:17,769 All right! Yeah! 609 01:11:43,419 --> 01:11:45,920 Your fears - they make you foolish. 610 01:11:52,969 --> 01:11:55,054 Go to her, Jack. 611 01:13:17,216 --> 01:13:21,178 - I'm sorry I got people shooting at you again. - You kidding? 612 01:13:21,262 --> 01:13:24,598 We're the perfect couple when we got people shooting at us. 613 01:13:24,682 --> 01:13:29,395 - Just the slow times I'm not too good at. - I guess I just expect too much. 614 01:13:29,478 --> 01:13:31,563 Maybe we both expect too much. 615 01:13:34,775 --> 01:13:36,860 Oh, boy. 616 01:13:38,570 --> 01:13:40,989 Thank you for coming to Kadir with me. 617 01:14:09,057 --> 01:14:11,560 This valley is gift of the Nile. 618 01:14:20,193 --> 01:14:22,362 I've been away from here too long. 619 01:14:26,700 --> 01:14:30,369 You know, I'm getting to like this guy Joe. He's growing on me. 620 01:14:30,453 --> 01:14:33,789 What do you say we cut him in on this jewel, if we ever find it? 621 01:14:33,873 --> 01:14:35,958 Jack... 622 01:14:36,751 --> 01:14:38,836 We have the Jewel. 623 01:14:39,837 --> 01:14:42,006 What are you talking about? Where? 624 01:14:42,590 --> 01:14:44,884 Well, there. 625 01:14:48,554 --> 01:14:50,640 - What, Joe's got the Jewel? - No. 626 01:14:52,098 --> 01:14:54,184 Joe is the Jewel. 627 01:14:57,854 --> 01:15:00,065 Joe is the Jewel of the Nile? 628 01:15:00,148 --> 01:15:04,319 He's a holy man. That's his religious title. 629 01:15:06,446 --> 01:15:08,740 Joe is the Jewel. 630 01:15:16,622 --> 01:15:20,417 Why didn't you tell me the truth? Why'd you keep it from me? 631 01:15:20,501 --> 01:15:23,629 Because I thought if you knew, you wouldn't come with us. 632 01:15:23,712 --> 01:15:25,798 Maybe I would've surprised you. 633 01:15:26,674 --> 01:15:30,678 I think I've come through once or twice, if I remember right. 634 01:15:30,761 --> 01:15:33,472 I'm sorry. 635 01:15:33,555 --> 01:15:36,475 You're right. You come through all the time. 636 01:15:44,065 --> 01:15:46,150 It's funny. 637 01:15:47,193 --> 01:15:49,696 I really thought we had a chance. 638 01:16:04,751 --> 01:16:06,753 Look! The train to Kadir! 639 01:16:06,837 --> 01:16:10,048 Come on, Jack. Inshallah, we'll be there tonight. 640 01:16:10,132 --> 01:16:14,303 - What a lot of people! - They are going to see the false redeemer. 641 01:16:14,386 --> 01:16:17,723 - Omar again, huh? - We'll see about that. 642 01:16:53,673 --> 01:16:55,759 Shit! 643 01:18:05,659 --> 01:18:07,744 What are you doing? 644 01:18:08,203 --> 01:18:10,497 Come on! 645 01:18:10,747 --> 01:18:12,416 Jump! 646 01:18:16,086 --> 01:18:17,504 No! 647 01:18:48,366 --> 01:18:50,452 No! Hang on, Joan! 648 01:19:09,261 --> 01:19:10,930 Jack, watch out! 649 01:19:11,013 --> 01:19:13,015 It's... 650 01:19:41,459 --> 01:19:45,255 Guys, wait up! Come on, Humphrey. Go, go, go! 651 01:19:54,681 --> 01:19:56,890 Do something! 652 01:19:56,974 --> 01:19:59,059 What do you want me to do? 653 01:21:31,814 --> 01:21:33,524 Colton! 654 01:21:35,109 --> 01:21:38,488 Your ass is grass, and I'm a lawn mower, Colton! 655 01:21:38,571 --> 01:21:41,407 Colton, I'll get you! Colton, I'm on to ya! 656 01:22:14,856 --> 01:22:16,524 Colton. 657 01:23:11,994 --> 01:23:14,079 All right, yeah! 658 01:23:16,540 --> 01:23:19,793 All right! Let's go, come on. Let's get out of here! 659 01:23:26,633 --> 01:23:28,718 Just-Joan, you're gre... 660 01:23:30,553 --> 01:23:32,430 Welcome. 661 01:23:32,513 --> 01:23:37,644 I don't usually travel by train, but I had a small accident with my helicopter. 662 01:23:50,948 --> 01:23:53,242 May we reach Kadir in time. 663 01:24:16,097 --> 01:24:20,142 Once we get inside, we must find the entrance to the catacombs. 664 01:24:21,018 --> 01:24:23,104 T-shirts! Buy T-shirts! 665 01:24:23,187 --> 01:24:27,650 Gimme the T-shirt. I'll buy it, I'll buy it. Get outta here, will ya? 666 01:24:47,919 --> 01:24:51,798 You know, I really admire your loyalty to each other. 667 01:24:52,507 --> 01:24:56,428 And I'm going to give you a chance to be together to the very end. 668 01:24:56,511 --> 01:24:58,388 Well, not exactly. 669 01:24:58,471 --> 01:25:01,599 One will watch the other die. 670 01:25:06,729 --> 01:25:08,814 But which one? 671 01:25:10,482 --> 01:25:12,568 Rachid. 672 01:25:14,278 --> 01:25:17,531 - Is that the goat's blood? - Yes. 673 01:25:17,615 --> 01:25:21,702 Very popular with the inhabitants of these catacombs. 674 01:25:22,161 --> 01:25:26,414 - Rats. - Yes. They eat until they get the last drop. 675 01:25:26,789 --> 01:25:29,834 But don't worry, Mr Colton. You won't be alone. 676 01:25:30,627 --> 01:25:35,757 Rachid is now placing acid that will eat through Miss Wilder's rope. 677 01:25:35,840 --> 01:25:38,760 What kind of sick pervert would go to this trouble? 678 01:25:39,219 --> 01:25:41,221 - Why don't you shoot us?! - Jack! 679 01:25:41,304 --> 01:25:45,225 What kind of demented psychopath would even think of this? 680 01:25:45,433 --> 01:25:47,935 - The Savage Secret. - What? 681 01:25:49,102 --> 01:25:50,979 Was my biggest seller. 682 01:25:55,234 --> 01:25:59,863 Think about this pit as your last adventure, Joan Wilder. 683 01:26:01,323 --> 01:26:03,617 My people await me. 684 01:26:23,803 --> 01:26:27,348 What you talkin' about? I work with professional people. 685 01:26:27,431 --> 01:26:31,435 You tell His Highness the show starts with him or without him. 686 01:26:39,150 --> 01:26:43,321 Goddamn beanie convention. Wind up goin' home with a rug. 687 01:26:43,405 --> 01:26:45,490 The entrance! 688 01:26:56,625 --> 01:26:58,919 Give me a red to the yellow. And cue! 689 01:27:00,796 --> 01:27:03,340 I said give me a red gel down there! 690 01:27:09,221 --> 01:27:12,266 And cue! For Gawd's sake, cue! 691 01:27:36,873 --> 01:27:39,876 Build it, build it softly. And give me some smoke. 692 01:28:10,238 --> 01:28:14,659 That's good, that's good, that's very good. Now, bring it up slowly. 693 01:29:31,858 --> 01:29:34,319 There are many rooms and many ways. 694 01:29:34,402 --> 01:29:36,613 You! You go this way. 695 01:29:36,696 --> 01:29:38,990 And, you! You go this way. 696 01:29:39,073 --> 01:29:41,533 And we: We go this way. 697 01:30:02,596 --> 01:30:04,680 Boy, it stinks in this place. 698 01:30:09,018 --> 01:30:11,646 What looks good, amigo? 699 01:30:11,729 --> 01:30:15,608 You go from this way. And... I go this way. 700 01:30:15,691 --> 01:30:17,777 All right. 701 01:30:18,778 --> 01:30:20,655 What a fruit loop. 702 01:30:22,198 --> 01:30:24,283 - How'd they get out? - What? 703 01:30:24,367 --> 01:30:27,327 In The Savage Secret, how'd they get out? 704 01:30:29,162 --> 01:30:32,040 Jesse had a knife hidden in his boot. 705 01:30:33,333 --> 01:30:36,336 You wouldn't happen to have a knife, would ya? 706 01:30:36,419 --> 01:30:39,464 - I'm not even wearing underwear. - Great! 707 01:30:40,590 --> 01:30:42,676 No! 708 01:31:01,902 --> 01:31:04,613 We were good together, weren't we, Joan Wilder? 709 01:31:04,697 --> 01:31:06,866 The best. 710 01:31:06,949 --> 01:31:09,869 - And we're gonna make it. - Yeah. 711 01:31:13,205 --> 01:31:15,623 Oh, God. I love you, lady. 712 01:31:15,707 --> 01:31:17,625 I love you, Jack. 713 01:31:17,959 --> 01:31:20,044 Will you marry me? 714 01:31:21,337 --> 01:31:24,632 - Yes! - Because I never want you leaving me again. 715 01:31:25,341 --> 01:31:29,345 You're not just saying that because this is it, are you? 716 01:31:31,055 --> 01:31:35,101 I'm saying it because I'm not afraid to say it any more. 717 01:31:49,364 --> 01:31:52,659 So where do you wanna go on our honeymoon? 718 01:32:14,138 --> 01:32:18,309 Rats! Get out of here, you... Goddamn rat farm! Go on! 719 01:32:18,684 --> 01:32:24,397 - Ralph! Get us out of here, will ya? - Ah! And there's the biggest rat of all. 720 01:32:25,315 --> 01:32:27,400 Colton, look at you. You... 721 01:32:28,360 --> 01:32:30,987 You don't know how many nights I dreamed of this. 722 01:32:31,071 --> 01:32:36,493 - Except your flesh was torn off your body. - Ralph, please, just help us down. 723 01:32:36,576 --> 01:32:38,662 Jack! Hold on! 724 01:32:39,955 --> 01:32:42,707 Well, well, well, Colton. 725 01:32:42,791 --> 01:32:47,253 I think this calls for a renegotiation. Don't you, Tarzan? Huh? 726 01:32:47,336 --> 01:32:50,589 This looks a little bit more like 70-30. 727 01:32:50,673 --> 01:32:55,177 - Or maybe even 80-20. - Ralph, will ya get the rats off that rope?! 728 01:32:55,803 --> 01:33:00,099 - I don't go near rats, buddy. - Ralph, do not be afraid. 729 01:33:01,559 --> 01:33:04,270 Remember the Sufi way: See with your heart. 730 01:33:04,895 --> 01:33:08,691 My heart sees rats, Pop. Don't let this garb fool you. 731 01:33:08,774 --> 01:33:11,025 Come on, Colton. Where's the Jewel? 732 01:33:11,109 --> 01:33:15,446 Ralph, I am the Jewel. The Jewel of the Nile. 733 01:33:15,530 --> 01:33:18,658 And I'm a kumquat from Queens. Pipe down, towel-head! 734 01:33:18,741 --> 01:33:21,911 - Come on, Ralph. - Take the ladder and put it over the well. 735 01:33:21,995 --> 01:33:25,665 - Please, don't let us die! - That's a good idea, Legs. 736 01:33:25,748 --> 01:33:31,170 I ain't gonna let you die, but I ain't movin' no ladder until you come across with the rock! 737 01:33:44,933 --> 01:33:47,477 Lookin' more like 90-10! Huh, kumquat? 738 01:33:49,354 --> 01:33:53,192 - Did you get the ladder all right? - Jack, help me unlock the Jewel. 739 01:33:53,275 --> 01:33:57,987 The Jewel? You mean you weren't shittin' me? That guy really is the Jewel? 740 01:33:58,070 --> 01:34:01,199 Come on. We still got time to stop Omar. Let's go. 741 01:34:02,325 --> 01:34:05,286 Ralph, that is not the Sufi way. 742 01:34:05,369 --> 01:34:10,583 I don't know what got into me, Jewels. Every time I'm around this guy he makes me crazy. 743 01:34:10,666 --> 01:34:14,879 Come on. Tell him to cut me down, Jewels. Come on, huh? 744 01:35:00,047 --> 01:35:03,759 Don't fuck around with the equipment! Bloody woman! 745 01:35:27,866 --> 01:35:29,951 Here they come, Jack. 746 01:35:51,680 --> 01:35:56,851 Oh, my God. Look at this. Looks like Our Lady of Mount Palmer schoolyard. 747 01:35:58,352 --> 01:36:00,271 Hold it! 748 01:36:04,567 --> 01:36:07,278 Excuse me. Pardon me. Coming through. 749 01:36:08,905 --> 01:36:10,573 Oh, Rachid. 750 01:36:10,656 --> 01:36:14,702 How ya doin'? Let's talk this over before you butcher me alive. 751 01:36:14,785 --> 01:36:17,288 What are you getting so steamed about? 752 01:36:20,081 --> 01:36:22,626 Look at that. It worked! 753 01:38:02,972 --> 01:38:05,141 Get over the wall. Come on! 754 01:38:05,516 --> 01:38:07,602 Get goin'. 755 01:38:12,565 --> 01:38:14,650 Keep going. 756 01:38:40,424 --> 01:38:43,886 I knew we'd hook up again, Colton. Get it? 757 01:38:46,639 --> 01:38:48,766 I swear to God! 758 01:38:48,849 --> 01:38:50,935 My right hand to God! 759 01:38:51,018 --> 01:38:53,103 Come on! 760 01:39:34,017 --> 01:39:39,231 I am dead, Miss Wilder. All that will be written for Omar is an epitaph. 761 01:39:39,606 --> 01:39:41,692 But I will not be alone. 762 01:39:51,367 --> 01:39:53,911 Who is going to save you now? 763 01:39:56,581 --> 01:39:58,040 Who? 764 01:40:39,163 --> 01:40:41,248 Well, you got your story. 765 01:40:42,208 --> 01:40:44,293 I got a lot more than that. 766 01:41:08,399 --> 01:41:10,193 You are married! 767 01:41:40,097 --> 01:41:42,808 Always a bridesmaid, never the bride. 768 01:41:42,891 --> 01:41:45,393 As usual, it's zilch for poor Ralphie. 769 01:41:48,312 --> 01:41:50,398 You are Sufi. 770 01:41:52,483 --> 01:41:54,569 Keep it always. 771 01:41:55,945 --> 01:41:58,030 Guys! 772 01:42:00,408 --> 01:42:02,493 Sufis rule! 773 01:45:47,333 --> 01:45:49,836 Subtitles by Visiontext 774 01:45:51,003 --> 01:45:53,089 ENGLISH