1
00:00:58,959 --> 00:01:00,292
What the shit is this?

2
00:01:00,294 --> 00:01:02,094
Why is this on
the get-psyched mix?

3
00:01:02,096 --> 00:01:03,328
'Cause I got to throw you
a curveball

4
00:01:03,330 --> 00:01:04,763
every now and then
or you get bored,

5
00:01:04,765 --> 00:01:06,598
and then the mix doesn't have
its intended effect.

6
00:01:06,600 --> 00:01:09,334
No, I want to get revved up,
and this song's not doing it.

7
00:01:09,336 --> 00:01:12,704
Oh, really? I defy you to crush
this chorus and not get psyched.

8
00:01:12,706 --> 00:01:14,106
Not going to happen.

9
00:01:21,048 --> 00:01:22,181
What is it?

10
00:01:29,023 --> 00:01:30,456
Help me out!

11
00:01:43,537 --> 00:01:44,703
He was afraid.

12
00:01:46,005 --> 00:01:48,273
- Bring it home.
- Oh, yeah.

13
00:01:48,275 --> 00:01:51,677
Come on, <i>papi.</i> Yes!

14
00:01:53,547 --> 00:01:55,080
We've got our jam on now.
- Jump to it.

15
00:01:55,082 --> 00:01:56,648
<i>It's been a dry June,</i>

16
00:01:56,650 --> 00:01:58,617
and I know it doesn't need
to be said out loud,

17
00:01:58,619 --> 00:01:59,952
but we need this sale.
- I am so confident

18
00:01:59,954 --> 00:02:02,387
that we're going
to close this thing

19
00:02:02,389 --> 00:02:03,288
that I'm going to order
the Pappy Van Winkle.

20
00:02:03,290 --> 00:02:04,890
I know it's pricey, but I want

21
00:02:04,892 --> 00:02:06,592
to spiritually invest
in our success.

22
00:02:06,594 --> 00:02:08,760
I'll tell you what, if you
didn't order the Pappy,

23
00:02:08,762 --> 00:02:11,196
I'd send your raggedy ass
back out to the car

24
00:02:11,198 --> 00:02:14,099
to listen to the get-psyched mix
to get your mind right.

25
00:02:14,101 --> 00:02:14,099
Let's go over the
stat sheet. Hit me.

26
00:02:14,101 --> 00:02:16,635
We're selling Bob Williams.
Been married 16 years.

27
00:02:16,637 --> 00:02:18,103
Wife Karen, one daughter.

28
00:02:18,105 --> 00:02:19,304
You read the first page
of the scouting report.

29
00:02:19,306 --> 00:02:20,772
Let me hip you to page two.

30
00:02:20,774 --> 00:02:22,508
Daughter's name is Skyler,
big into gymnastics.

31
00:02:22,510 --> 00:02:25,511
And to hear Bob tell it, the kid
is aces on the pommel horse.

32
00:02:25,513 --> 00:02:27,513
He don't just tell it, old boy.
He likes to show it with
pictures.

33
00:02:27,515 --> 00:02:30,516
Everyone's searching
for something. Am I right, Bob?

34
00:02:30,518 --> 00:02:32,451
Love. Success.

35
00:02:32,453 --> 00:02:36,321
But what's the one thing
that no one can get more of?

36
00:02:37,290 --> 00:02:38,957
Time.

37
00:02:38,959 --> 00:02:41,493
Mmm. And you can't fight it.

38
00:02:41,495 --> 00:02:43,896
Well, you don't have to tell me.
I mean, look at my little girl.

39
00:02:43,898 --> 00:02:44,930
How old is Skyler
nowadays, Bob?

40
00:02:44,932 --> 00:02:46,398
Just turned nine in May.
- Nine?

41
00:02:46,400 --> 00:02:47,399
Isn't that something?
- She just turned nine.

42
00:02:47,401 --> 00:02:48,800
Skyler's nine?
- Mmm.

43
00:02:48,802 --> 00:02:50,702
Good Lord. How old
does that make all of us?

44
00:02:50,704 --> 00:02:52,471
Don't answer that
question, Bob.

45
00:02:52,473 --> 00:02:54,840
Let's move on.
- I was about...
I was about to answer.

46
00:02:54,842 --> 00:02:57,743
Pretty soon, she's going to be
borrowing Karen's makeup,

47
00:02:57,745 --> 00:02:59,878
and you're going to have
two beauties on your hands.

48
00:02:59,880 --> 00:03:01,180
Lock the door.
It's coming, Bob.

49
00:03:01,182 --> 00:03:02,581
Double digits.
- No way. Is Skyler

50
00:03:02,583 --> 00:03:04,550
still giving them hell
on that pommel horse?

51
00:03:04,552 --> 00:03:07,019
You want to see that photo?
- If it's not too much trouble.

52
00:03:07,021 --> 00:03:08,754
Yeah, let me show you Sky, yeah.

53
00:03:08,756 --> 00:03:10,556
Let's get those
eyes on Skyler.
- Look at her.

54
00:03:10,558 --> 00:03:12,491
Yeah... yeah,
she's really sprouted.

55
00:03:12,493 --> 00:03:14,193
Yeah, yeah, yeah, Skyler's
really slimming down.

56
00:03:14,195 --> 00:03:16,028
And I'll tell you what.

57
00:03:16,030 --> 00:03:17,496
Gorgeous.
- She's eating
really healthy.

58
00:03:17,498 --> 00:03:20,299
Just mostly fruits and nuts.

59
00:03:20,301 --> 00:03:23,001
Her choice.
- There is no telling
what this little girl

60
00:03:23,003 --> 00:03:24,403
on a squirrel diet
could end up doing.

61
00:03:24,405 --> 00:03:26,305
Could she win us the gold
and make us proud?

62
00:03:26,307 --> 00:03:27,739
You're damn right
she could.
- You're damn right.

63
00:03:27,741 --> 00:03:29,274
I have a feeling
she's already made you proud.

64
00:03:29,276 --> 00:03:31,043
Am I right?
- Guilty. Guilty, my friend.

65
00:03:31,045 --> 00:03:33,845
Oh, guys, it... it goes so fast.

66
00:03:33,847 --> 00:03:35,881
Oh, it's like a freight train
going down the track.

67
00:03:35,883 --> 00:03:37,516
Clickety-clack, clickety-clack.
Now she's got a boyfriend.

68
00:03:37,518 --> 00:03:39,218
Oh.
- Guy you like,
hopefully.

69
00:03:39,220 --> 00:03:42,221
Clickety-clack, clickety-clack,
she's married.

70
00:03:42,223 --> 00:03:44,489
Clickety-clack,
she's putting you in a home!

71
00:03:44,491 --> 00:03:45,958
Oh, my God, a home.

72
00:03:45,960 --> 00:03:47,192
She would do it, too.

73
00:03:47,194 --> 00:03:48,627
I believe that, too.
- No, no, she would.

74
00:03:48,629 --> 00:03:50,395
Only when you don't
remember who she is.

75
00:03:50,397 --> 00:03:52,664
I'm kidding!

76
00:03:52,666 --> 00:03:56,201
Oh, it feels good
to laugh about Alzheimer's.

77
00:03:56,203 --> 00:03:57,869
You can't control time.

78
00:03:57,871 --> 00:03:59,304
No.

79
00:03:59,306 --> 00:04:02,207
But... you can manage it.

80
00:04:02,209 --> 00:04:05,344
Mmm.
- Bob...

81
00:04:05,346 --> 00:04:07,079
the Chronoshock Aught Thirteen.

82
00:04:07,081 --> 00:04:08,380
Carpe diem.

83
00:04:08,382 --> 00:04:10,649
These babies will fly
off your shelf.

84
00:04:10,651 --> 00:04:12,517
Now, I know that you've moved up
to having six stores,

85
00:04:12,519 --> 00:04:13,885
so you're probably
going to want to have

86
00:04:13,887 --> 00:04:15,721
a little larger order
than you did last year.

87
00:04:15,723 --> 00:04:17,322
You're kidding, right?

88
00:04:19,359 --> 00:04:22,227
Your... your business
has... been folded.

89
00:04:22,229 --> 00:04:24,229
I'm sorry?
- No, no, no, no, Bob,

90
00:04:24,231 --> 00:04:25,497
there has been some chatter.

91
00:04:25,499 --> 00:04:27,099
The last few years
have been rough.

92
00:04:27,101 --> 00:04:29,234
But come on,
who hasn't felt the pinch?

93
00:04:29,236 --> 00:04:31,103
Yeah.
They didn't tell you, did they?

94
00:04:31,105 --> 00:04:32,504
Look...

95
00:04:32,506 --> 00:04:34,773
I thought you guys
just wanted to grab dinner

96
00:04:34,775 --> 00:04:36,708
for old times' sake,
but, uh...
- Yeah.

97
00:04:36,710 --> 00:04:39,011
Your company is closed.

98
00:04:39,013 --> 00:04:41,847
I hate to be the one
telling you that.

99
00:04:41,849 --> 00:04:45,684
Honestly, I know
that I can't buy the watches

100
00:04:45,686 --> 00:04:49,254
because your company
doesn't exist anymore,

101
00:04:49,256 --> 00:04:50,289
but I wish I could.

102
00:04:50,291 --> 00:04:52,658
I mean, that's
how good you guys are.

103
00:04:52,660 --> 00:04:54,760
One round of Pappy Van Winkle.

104
00:04:54,762 --> 00:04:56,595
Enjoy, gentlemen.

105
00:04:56,597 --> 00:04:59,898
Oh... wow.

106
00:04:59,900 --> 00:05:01,533
That is expensive stuff.

107
00:05:01,535 --> 00:05:04,269
You know, Bob, uh...
do you mind, uh...

108
00:05:04,271 --> 00:05:05,771
just going Dutch?
- You don't have to say
any more.

109
00:05:05,773 --> 00:05:07,673
I got it. I'm doing this.
Let me do this.

110
00:05:07,675 --> 00:05:09,775
I'm saying let's slice the pie
three ways, honestly.

111
00:05:09,777 --> 00:05:11,476
If you don't mind.
- No, that-that-that's silly.

112
00:05:11,478 --> 00:05:13,578
That's silly.
I'm doing really, really...

113
00:05:13,580 --> 00:05:16,281
really well right now,
and you guys are not.

114
00:05:16,283 --> 00:05:17,683
But, Bob, I can...
- At all.

115
00:05:17,685 --> 00:05:18,817
Let me do this.

116
00:05:18,819 --> 00:05:20,519
But let's just split it.
Let's go Dutch.

117
00:05:20,521 --> 00:05:22,254
Okay. Okay.
- Let's be the
three Dutchmen.

118
00:05:22,256 --> 00:05:23,555
Okay, but this Dutchman's
going to...

119
00:05:23,557 --> 00:05:25,424
going to pay when he can
in a couple weeks.

120
00:05:25,426 --> 00:05:26,792
I hope you understand.

121
00:05:26,794 --> 00:05:28,760
<i>What the fuck, Sammy?</i>

122
00:05:28,762 --> 00:05:30,962
What the fuck, me?
What the fuck, you?

123
00:05:30,964 --> 00:05:32,297
Who told you you could barge

124
00:05:32,299 --> 00:05:33,532
into my office
without an appointment?

125
00:05:33,534 --> 00:05:34,700
You closed the company?

126
00:05:34,702 --> 00:05:36,468
And then you send
us out on a sale

127
00:05:36,470 --> 00:05:37,769
that we really needed

128
00:05:37,771 --> 00:05:39,871
and had Bob Williams
drop that bomb on us?

129
00:05:39,873 --> 00:05:42,908
Bob Williams has got
a big fucking mouth.

130
00:05:42,910 --> 00:05:44,409
Yeah, he does.
- Look.

131
00:05:44,411 --> 00:05:45,444
You weren't going to get
the sale anyway.

132
00:05:45,446 --> 00:05:46,678
Nobody wears a watch anymore.

133
00:05:46,680 --> 00:05:48,347
They just check
their goddamn phones.

134
00:05:48,349 --> 00:05:49,815
Disagree.
Cite your sources.
- The kids, maybe,

135
00:05:49,817 --> 00:05:51,483
but there's...
there's a broader market.

136
00:05:51,485 --> 00:05:52,751
Lorraine, what time is it?

137
00:05:53,820 --> 00:05:55,187
10:26.

138
00:05:55,189 --> 00:05:59,024
One hip, pioneering secretary
does not a cultural trend make.

139
00:05:59,026 --> 00:06:00,425
She's 75 years old.

140
00:06:00,427 --> 00:06:02,327
Watches are obsolete,
and so are the two of you.

141
00:06:02,329 --> 00:06:03,328
Hey. Obsolete?

142
00:06:03,330 --> 00:06:04,863
What does that even mean?

143
00:06:04,865 --> 00:06:07,232
It means everything's
computerized now.

144
00:06:07,234 --> 00:06:08,900
It's cheaper
for a machine to tell

145
00:06:08,902 --> 00:06:11,036
these companies what to order
than a manufacturer's rep.

146
00:06:11,038 --> 00:06:12,804
They don't need us anymore.

147
00:06:12,806 --> 00:06:16,341
No, people have a deep
mistrust of machines.
- That's right.

148
00:06:16,343 --> 00:06:18,510
Have you seen <i>Terminator?</i>

149
00:06:18,512 --> 00:06:21,480
Yep. Mm-hmm.
All of them.
- Or <i>2</i> or <i>3</i> or <i>4?</i>

150
00:06:21,482 --> 00:06:25,350
People want to deal with
people, not Terminators.

151
00:06:25,352 --> 00:06:27,185
People hate people.

152
00:06:27,187 --> 00:06:28,353
Times have changed.

153
00:06:28,355 --> 00:06:29,921
That's so negative.

154
00:06:29,923 --> 00:06:31,990
Luckily, I saw this coming,
cashed out my retirement,

155
00:06:31,992 --> 00:06:34,659
bought a condo in Miami Beach,
new tits for the wife.

156
00:06:34,661 --> 00:06:36,661
Silicone. It's legal again.

157
00:06:36,663 --> 00:06:38,463
- Wow.
- Saline's out?
- Yeah, me and the old lady

158
00:06:38,465 --> 00:06:40,899
are going to be tucked away
real nice.

159
00:06:40,901 --> 00:06:42,167
Yeah, great for you, huh?

160
00:06:42,169 --> 00:06:43,368
Perfect.

161
00:06:43,370 --> 00:06:45,771
So, uh, that's it, right?

162
00:06:45,773 --> 00:06:48,340
But what about us, Sammy?

163
00:06:48,342 --> 00:06:51,676
You two were great salesmen...
the best...

164
00:06:51,678 --> 00:06:54,513
but at the end of the day,
you're grinders, foot soldiers.

165
00:06:54,515 --> 00:06:56,281
We all know
you'll never be generals.

166
00:06:56,283 --> 00:06:57,884
And I'm going to say
something harsh now.

167
00:06:57,885 --> 00:06:59,684
Now you're going to say
something harsh?

168
00:06:59,686 --> 00:07:02,554
Strap it in, boys, 'cause it
ain't pretty out there.

169
00:07:02,556 --> 00:07:04,289
And you two are dinosaurs.

170
00:07:04,291 --> 00:07:06,057
Face it.

171
00:07:06,059 --> 00:07:09,761
Where you're going...
you've already been.

172
00:07:10,663 --> 00:07:12,831
I thank you for your service.

173
00:07:17,136 --> 00:07:20,138
What are we going to do?

174
00:07:20,140 --> 00:07:22,140
I don't know.

175
00:07:22,142 --> 00:07:24,509
But I got to worry
about the now.

176
00:07:24,511 --> 00:07:27,112
I don't know what the hell
I'm going to say to Megan.

177
00:07:35,489 --> 00:07:37,522
No. Let it play.

178
00:07:37,524 --> 00:07:41,460
For the love of God,
let it play.

179
00:07:48,735 --> 00:07:51,403
- Come on, Megan, listen to me.
- Honey, let's talk about this.

180
00:07:51,405 --> 00:07:53,405
Is this because
I'm too unselfish in bed?

181
00:07:53,407 --> 00:07:55,507
Because I can change it around.
I'm not going to say
it's going to be easy,

182
00:07:55,509 --> 00:07:57,008
but I can do it.
Megan, listen to me.

183
00:07:57,010 --> 00:07:59,644
Honey, it's always darkest
before the dawn.

184
00:07:59,646 --> 00:08:01,379
No, Billy, it's not.
It's actually darkest
in the middle of the night.

185
00:08:01,381 --> 00:08:04,282
We have enough on the table here
without arguing about proverbs.

186
00:08:04,284 --> 00:08:05,517
Look, I knew things
weren't great,

187
00:08:05,519 --> 00:08:07,252
but to come home
to a foreclosure sign?

188
00:08:07,254 --> 00:08:09,087
Can we hug it for a second?
Can I touch it?
- No. No, please.

189
00:08:09,089 --> 00:08:10,755
Okay, listen.
That could've been avoided

190
00:08:10,757 --> 00:08:12,557
if the Bob Williams deal
didn't go so bad on me.

191
00:08:12,559 --> 00:08:14,559
You blew the Bob Williams deal?
- Well, it's not so much

192
00:08:14,561 --> 00:08:16,461
that I blew the deal
as much as the company

193
00:08:16,463 --> 00:08:18,063
just decided to shut down
and take our jobs away.

194
00:08:18,065 --> 00:08:19,598
What?
- Come on, listen to me,
sweetheart.

195
00:08:19,600 --> 00:08:21,466
I promise you,
I can pay for all of this.

196
00:08:21,468 --> 00:08:22,701
It's not about
the money, Billy.

197
00:08:22,703 --> 00:08:24,336
This is about you, okay?

198
00:08:24,338 --> 00:08:27,739
You-you talk a big game, but you
never do anything about it.

199
00:08:27,741 --> 00:08:29,474
It's like you say that we're
going to go to Spain,

200
00:08:29,476 --> 00:08:30,842
but have I ever
been to Barcelona?
- "Barthelona."

201
00:08:30,844 --> 00:08:33,011
Ugh.
- And not yet,
but we're going.

202
00:08:33,013 --> 00:08:34,479
<i>Vaya con dios, mi amor.</i>

203
00:08:34,481 --> 00:08:35,814
What?
- <i>Porque esta bravo</i>

204
00:08:35,816 --> 00:08:37,849
<i>en Barthelona y fant�stico.</i>

205
00:08:37,851 --> 00:08:39,684
No, we are not going
to "Barthelona," okay?

206
00:08:39,686 --> 00:08:41,686
We have discussed going
to Barthelona,

207
00:08:41,688 --> 00:08:44,623
but we are never going
to go to Barthelona.

208
00:08:44,625 --> 00:08:46,791
Not with an attitude
like that, we're not.
- Oh, God.

209
00:08:46,793 --> 00:08:48,493
Wait, do you
even hear yourself?

210
00:08:48,495 --> 00:08:50,095
Yes.
- I'm glad that you got
to say some of that,

211
00:08:50,097 --> 00:08:51,663
because we're in a
relationship, and I'm

212
00:08:51,665 --> 00:08:53,298
just glad that we're both
committed to it.

213
00:08:53,300 --> 00:08:55,867
No... do you know how badly
I want to believe that, Billy?

214
00:08:55,869 --> 00:08:57,836
Because I've been with you
for a long time,

215
00:08:57,838 --> 00:08:59,538
and nothing ever seems
to get better.

216
00:08:59,540 --> 00:09:01,006
Honey, you were...

217
00:09:01,008 --> 00:09:04,643
you're such a great guy,
but you always figure out

218
00:09:04,645 --> 00:09:07,145
a way to screw things up
and let people down.

219
00:09:07,147 --> 00:09:09,514
And, Billy, I love you,

220
00:09:09,516 --> 00:09:12,017
but I'm really tired
of being let down.

221
00:09:16,924 --> 00:09:19,925
That's terrible, Nicky.

222
00:09:19,927 --> 00:09:21,092
Are you okay?

223
00:09:21,094 --> 00:09:23,395
I should have gone on my own
when I had the chance.

224
00:09:23,397 --> 00:09:24,863
I was so stupid. I was...

225
00:09:24,865 --> 00:09:26,298
Nicky, you did the right thing.

226
00:09:26,300 --> 00:09:28,133
Always got a paycheck,
played it smart.

227
00:09:28,135 --> 00:09:29,534
Dad would have been proud.

228
00:09:29,536 --> 00:09:31,069
Well, what would he
have been proud of?

229
00:09:31,071 --> 00:09:33,238
I didn't play it smart.
I played it safe.

230
00:09:33,240 --> 00:09:34,239
And look where I am now.

231
00:09:34,241 --> 00:09:35,774
Proud?

232
00:09:35,776 --> 00:09:37,642
You're at your nephew's
Little League game.

233
00:09:37,644 --> 00:09:38,643
Now, cheer up.

234
00:09:38,645 --> 00:09:40,111
Okay.
- Come on.

235
00:09:40,113 --> 00:09:42,614
All right, Tate!
- All right,
here we go, Tate.

236
00:09:42,616 --> 00:09:44,082
Put some wood on it.

237
00:09:44,084 --> 00:09:45,584
He's a great kid.

238
00:09:45,586 --> 00:09:48,420
I keep telling you you'd
make a terrific father.

239
00:09:48,422 --> 00:09:50,589
Yep, you do keep
telling me that.

240
00:09:50,591 --> 00:09:52,123
Unfortunately, it would
require you having

241
00:09:52,125 --> 00:09:54,626
a relationship that lasted
longer than three months.

242
00:09:54,628 --> 00:09:56,928
I'm not sure it
would require that.

243
00:09:56,930 --> 00:09:59,164
Let me call Kevin.
- Jeanie...

244
00:09:59,166 --> 00:10:00,832
I'm sure your boyfriend's
a great guy,

245
00:10:00,834 --> 00:10:02,767
but I'm not ready
to work for someone

246
00:10:02,769 --> 00:10:04,636
who spent all
of last Thanksgiving

247
00:10:04,638 --> 00:10:07,105
explaining the meaning
of his tattoo.

248
00:10:07,107 --> 00:10:08,506
Be reasonable, Nicky.

249
00:10:08,508 --> 00:10:10,108
Take the job.

250
00:10:10,110 --> 00:10:12,177
What else are you going to do?

251
00:10:12,179 --> 00:10:14,679
That's it. Just take
the walk, Eagle Eye.

252
00:10:14,681 --> 00:10:16,181
Walk's as good as a hit.
Come on.

253
00:10:16,183 --> 00:10:17,782
What is this guy saying?
Bullshit.

254
00:10:17,784 --> 00:10:19,584
Nick. Nick!

255
00:10:19,586 --> 00:10:21,987
A walk's not as good as a hit.
It's not as good
- Nick!

256
00:10:21,989 --> 00:10:23,555
As a double or a triple.

257
00:10:23,557 --> 00:10:24,856
It's not as good as a dinger.

258
00:10:24,858 --> 00:10:26,224
Go on, take a big cut, Tate.

259
00:10:26,226 --> 00:10:27,459
Nick!

260
00:10:27,461 --> 00:10:29,527
Get off the field.
- What are you doing?

261
00:10:29,529 --> 00:10:31,930
You call him Eagle Eye
to get him not to swing?

262
00:10:31,932 --> 00:10:33,565
Come on, he's 12 years old.

263
00:10:33,567 --> 00:10:35,734
He's got the rest
of his life to take a walk.

264
00:10:35,736 --> 00:10:38,403
How about you take a walk,
pal, and get off my field?

265
00:10:38,405 --> 00:10:39,971
Just stop calling him
Eagle Eye, okay?

266
00:10:39,973 --> 00:10:41,740
Oh, I'm going to
call him Eagle Eye.

267
00:10:41,742 --> 00:10:43,541
Oh, no, you're not.
- Yes, I am.

268
00:10:43,543 --> 00:10:45,076
You're Eagle Eye,
you piece of...
- No, I'm not.

269
00:10:45,078 --> 00:10:46,711
Huh?

270
00:10:47,847 --> 00:10:49,881
Nick!
Get off me!

271
00:10:51,018 --> 00:10:53,852
Go ahead, Tate. Swing!

272
00:10:53,854 --> 00:10:55,954
I'm okay! I'm okay.

273
00:10:55,956 --> 00:10:57,022
Play ball!

274
00:10:57,024 --> 00:10:59,257
Come on, Tate! Swing big!

275
00:11:06,132 --> 00:11:07,232
Read <i>Moneyball,</i> asshole.

276
00:11:07,234 --> 00:11:09,701
Walks <i>are</i> as good as hits.

277
00:11:13,740 --> 00:11:15,073
Just when you think your day

278
00:11:15,075 --> 00:11:17,142
couldn't get any worse,
it got worse.

279
00:11:17,144 --> 00:11:18,576
I feel like my day

280
00:11:18,578 --> 00:11:21,546
bent me over, put a ball
in my mouth and fucked me bad.

281
00:11:22,848 --> 00:11:25,850
Is it just me, or does life look
a lot like those hillbillies

282
00:11:25,852 --> 00:11:27,118
from <i>Deliverance right now?</i>

283
00:11:27,120 --> 00:11:29,087
It's got me over
by the tree there,

284
00:11:29,089 --> 00:11:31,322
just told me I had
a pretty mouth.

285
00:11:31,324 --> 00:11:35,026
You over, squealing like a
pig on all fours. "Whee!"

286
00:11:35,028 --> 00:11:37,495
I'm looking, "Wh-Where's Burt
Reynolds with the crossbow?"

287
00:11:37,497 --> 00:11:39,097
He's not coming.

288
00:11:39,099 --> 00:11:41,266
We're there, it's gonna happen.

289
00:11:41,268 --> 00:11:42,701
You're gonna get raped.

290
00:11:42,703 --> 00:11:44,169
You know what it is?

291
00:11:44,171 --> 00:11:47,138
I feel like life's inside of me,
just working,

292
00:11:47,140 --> 00:11:49,441
just pushing,
just going all after it.

293
00:11:49,443 --> 00:11:51,476
And then, all of a sudden,
life pulls out.

294
00:11:51,478 --> 00:11:53,278
But he's gonna scurry up
the pillow.

295
00:11:53,280 --> 00:11:55,714
Boom, just explodes
right in my fucking mouth.

296
00:11:56,816 --> 00:11:58,783
How are you?

297
00:11:58,785 --> 00:12:00,585
Hey. A cute kid.

298
00:12:00,587 --> 00:12:02,020
How old is she?

299
00:12:02,022 --> 00:12:03,221
She's a boy.

300
00:12:03,223 --> 00:12:04,022
Okay.

301
00:12:04,024 --> 00:12:05,724
Still very attractive.

302
00:12:05,726 --> 00:12:07,125
You know, without pink or blue,

303
00:12:07,127 --> 00:12:08,460
it's hard to tell,
but the features are great.

304
00:12:08,462 --> 00:12:09,794
Maybe... maybe put him
in some modeling.

305
00:12:09,796 --> 00:12:10,995
That's what they're going for...

306
00:12:10,997 --> 00:12:12,297
that right-down-the-middle
thing.

307
00:12:12,299 --> 00:12:14,232
It's like, how many
different ways

308
00:12:14,234 --> 00:12:16,534
do we have to say, "I give up,"

309
00:12:16,536 --> 00:12:17,836
say "uncle," say "mercy"

310
00:12:17,838 --> 00:12:20,038
before life stops
wailing away on us?

311
00:12:20,040 --> 00:12:22,107
I mean, we are getting pounded.

312
00:12:22,109 --> 00:12:24,476
You know, I feel like
our whole generation are sheep

313
00:12:24,478 --> 00:12:26,244
that's been sold
a bad bill of goods.

314
00:12:26,246 --> 00:12:29,514
Like, we were told, you know,
go to college, get good grades.

315
00:12:29,516 --> 00:12:31,316
Well, you didn't go to college.

316
00:12:31,318 --> 00:12:34,018
I'm saying,
in theory, in concept,

317
00:12:34,020 --> 00:12:36,187
our generation was told
that you go to college,

318
00:12:36,189 --> 00:12:38,089
you get a job, you...
you get a mortgage,

319
00:12:38,091 --> 00:12:39,657
and, you know,
here we did everything

320
00:12:39,659 --> 00:12:40,859
the way we were supposed to,

321
00:12:40,861 --> 00:12:42,127
and what do we get for it?

322
00:12:42,129 --> 00:12:43,690
Where's our thanks?
Nothing.

323
00:12:44,663 --> 00:12:47,332
I think I'm going to call
Kevin about that job.

324
00:12:47,334 --> 00:12:48,533
Kevin?

325
00:12:48,535 --> 00:12:50,401
Thanksgiving tattoo?

326
00:12:50,403 --> 00:12:52,670
We're not that low,
are we, Nick?

327
00:13:20,766 --> 00:13:22,634
Okay.

328
00:13:22,636 --> 00:13:24,202
Come on.

329
00:13:24,204 --> 00:13:27,105
Show me one little
something here.

330
00:13:30,743 --> 00:13:32,977
What are you going to do, Billy?
Come on, Billy.

331
00:14:26,098 --> 00:14:28,299
There he is.

332
00:14:28,301 --> 00:14:29,981
Nickrophiliac!
- Hey.

333
00:14:31,204 --> 00:14:32,036
How you been?

334
00:14:32,038 --> 00:14:33,872
Good. Just working away.
- Yeah.

335
00:14:33,874 --> 00:14:35,106
Yeah. I see that.
- Yeah.

336
00:14:35,108 --> 00:14:36,308
Don't slag off on the corners.

337
00:14:36,309 --> 00:14:37,709
Okay.

338
00:14:37,711 --> 00:14:39,377
The corners are
so important.
- All right.

339
00:14:39,379 --> 00:14:41,446
'Cause we got people tracking
shit in here all the time.

340
00:14:41,448 --> 00:14:42,747
Okay.

341
00:14:42,749 --> 00:14:45,617
And I mean, like,
literally dog shit.

342
00:14:45,619 --> 00:14:46,918
Jesus.

343
00:14:46,920 --> 00:14:48,253
Huh?
- Wow, I should've
worn some gloves.

344
00:14:48,255 --> 00:14:49,988
I said I should've worn
some gloves.

345
00:14:49,990 --> 00:14:51,256
Gloves aren't gonna help you.

346
00:14:51,258 --> 00:14:53,224
You don't want protector duty?

347
00:14:53,226 --> 00:14:54,926
'Cause I got another
place I can put you:

348
00:14:54,928 --> 00:14:56,828
out on the curb,
twirling the big arrow.

349
00:14:56,830 --> 00:14:57,896
Does that sound good?

350
00:14:57,898 --> 00:14:59,230
Hot sun beating down on you?

351
00:14:59,232 --> 00:15:00,932
I've lost three of those
guys to skin cancer.

352
00:15:00,934 --> 00:15:02,667
We call that curb
"the widow maker."

353
00:15:02,669 --> 00:15:04,669
I don't want to go out
to the widow maker.
- Okay?

354
00:15:04,671 --> 00:15:07,338
How do you think you'd fare out
there with that alabaster skin?

355
00:15:07,340 --> 00:15:09,474
Well, I-I don't know.
- I'll tell you.

356
00:15:09,476 --> 00:15:10,742
You'd be dead in a year.

357
00:15:10,744 --> 00:15:12,210
It felt like you...

358
00:15:12,212 --> 00:15:13,811
Whoa, whoa, whoa,
whoa, whoa, whoa.

359
00:15:13,813 --> 00:15:14,846
Jeggings.
- What?

360
00:15:14,848 --> 00:15:16,614
Jeggings, 5:00.
- Where?

361
00:15:16,616 --> 00:15:19,284
Right there.

362
00:15:19,286 --> 00:15:21,352
I'd like to play around
in that rumpus room.

363
00:15:21,354 --> 00:15:22,955
You know what I mean?
- Yeah.

364
00:15:22,956 --> 00:15:24,355
Have you done the back door yet?

365
00:15:24,357 --> 00:15:25,957
Do what?
- Back door.

366
00:15:25,959 --> 00:15:27,325
Back-door action.

367
00:15:27,327 --> 00:15:29,060
"Knock-knock." Back door.

368
00:15:29,062 --> 00:15:30,561
No.
- "It's me."

369
00:15:30,563 --> 00:15:31,362
No.

370
00:15:31,364 --> 00:15:33,364
"With my penis."
- No.

371
00:15:33,366 --> 00:15:34,899
A life changer.

372
00:15:34,901 --> 00:15:36,534
It is a life changer!

373
00:15:36,536 --> 00:15:39,437
You VIP your way
into that back alley,

374
00:15:39,439 --> 00:15:41,506
you don't even think about
the main entrance anymore.

375
00:15:41,508 --> 00:15:44,242
You know what I mean by
"the main entrance"?

376
00:15:44,244 --> 00:15:47,378
We're talking dick
into the vagina.

377
00:15:47,380 --> 00:15:49,714
Kevin, this is
an awkward conversation.

378
00:15:49,716 --> 00:15:50,782
Why?

379
00:15:50,784 --> 00:15:52,984
Because you're going out
with my sister!

380
00:15:52,986 --> 00:15:56,187
Oh, yeah. Well, don't-don't
think we didn't go through

381
00:15:56,189 --> 00:15:57,555
a period of adjustment.

382
00:15:57,557 --> 00:15:58,790
Adjustment?

383
00:15:58,792 --> 00:16:00,124
Can you gentlemen help me?

384
00:16:00,126 --> 00:16:02,226
Yes, ma'am. Nick is
one of our best.

385
00:16:02,228 --> 00:16:03,661
In fact, his entire family

386
00:16:03,663 --> 00:16:05,830
knows their way
around a mattress.

387
00:16:07,866 --> 00:16:09,334
Get it.
- What are...?

388
00:16:09,336 --> 00:16:11,869
Get it done.
- My question is about

389
00:16:11,871 --> 00:16:13,671
memory foam versus standard.

390
00:16:13,673 --> 00:16:15,873
Specifically as it relates
to lumbar support.

391
00:16:15,875 --> 00:16:17,775
What?

392
00:16:17,777 --> 00:16:19,210
Lumbar support.
- I'm... Okay, I'm sorry.

393
00:16:19,212 --> 00:16:20,945
Hi, great choice
in mattress.
- Yeah.

394
00:16:20,947 --> 00:16:23,414
Why don't you go ahead
and, uh, lie down there.

395
00:16:23,416 --> 00:16:25,049
Let's try to work our way
through this conundrum,

396
00:16:25,051 --> 00:16:27,552
uh, because what I think
you're asking is...
- Oh, man.

397
00:16:27,554 --> 00:16:29,988
Uh, Billy, I'm with
a customer, thank you.
- Sure.

398
00:16:29,990 --> 00:16:31,990
Pardon me, ma'am, yeah,
just maybe start off on this.

399
00:16:31,992 --> 00:16:34,192
Yeah. Just lay it down.
- Yeah, come here
for a second.

400
00:16:34,194 --> 00:16:35,927
Hey, what are you doing here?

401
00:16:35,929 --> 00:16:37,428
Listen, I got it.

402
00:16:37,430 --> 00:16:38,730
I've seen the future,
and it's beautiful for us.

403
00:16:38,732 --> 00:16:40,431
Okay, I don't know
what you got,

404
00:16:40,433 --> 00:16:42,533
but I got a job here,
and I don't want to lose it.

405
00:16:42,535 --> 00:16:43,701
Now, can we talk
about this later?

406
00:16:43,703 --> 00:16:45,169
No, we can't talk
about it later.

407
00:16:45,171 --> 00:16:46,671
The future doesn't know later.

408
00:16:46,673 --> 00:16:47,605
What are you...?

409
00:16:47,607 --> 00:16:49,173
All the future is, is later.

410
00:16:49,175 --> 00:16:50,775
That's literally
what the future is.

411
00:16:50,777 --> 00:16:51,609
It's later.

412
00:16:51,611 --> 00:16:52,944
What are you talking about?

413
00:16:52,946 --> 00:16:54,312
Google.

414
00:16:54,314 --> 00:16:56,214
Google?
- Yeah.

415
00:16:56,216 --> 00:16:57,448
The place is amazing.

416
00:16:57,450 --> 00:16:59,384
They got nap pods,
they got massage rooms,

417
00:16:59,386 --> 00:17:00,451
they got a volleyball court.

418
00:17:00,453 --> 00:17:01,919
They got the whole nine.

419
00:17:01,921 --> 00:17:04,288
It's ranked as the greatest
place to work at in America.

420
00:17:04,290 --> 00:17:05,823
Yeah, I know.
It's a technology company...

421
00:17:05,825 --> 00:17:07,592
a field we know
jack squat about.

422
00:17:07,594 --> 00:17:09,227
Look-it, Google needs us.

423
00:17:09,229 --> 00:17:10,828
And Google wants us.

424
00:17:10,830 --> 00:17:11,929
They do?

425
00:17:11,931 --> 00:17:13,464
You sweet son of a bitch.

426
00:17:13,466 --> 00:17:15,166
You got us a job at Google?

427
00:17:15,168 --> 00:17:16,434
Well, it's not actually a job.

428
00:17:16,436 --> 00:17:17,869
What do you mean,
not an actual job?

429
00:17:17,871 --> 00:17:19,937
Well, it's an interview
for an internship that has

430
00:17:19,939 --> 00:17:22,607
a better-than-not chance
of materializing into a job.

431
00:17:22,609 --> 00:17:25,376
Billy, now you're
making me very angry.

432
00:17:25,378 --> 00:17:28,279
You want me to leave my job
to go for an interview,

433
00:17:28,281 --> 00:17:30,581
not for a job
but for an internship

434
00:17:30,583 --> 00:17:32,283
that may or may not
lead to a job?

435
00:17:32,285 --> 00:17:35,253
Nick, aren't you tired of asking
for just enough to get by?

436
00:17:35,255 --> 00:17:36,387
Yes.

437
00:17:36,389 --> 00:17:39,123
I want to do something
that matters.

438
00:17:39,125 --> 00:17:42,293
I want to have a life that I'm
excited about and that's great.

439
00:17:42,295 --> 00:17:44,629
Nick, I want us
to go to California.

440
00:17:44,631 --> 00:17:47,098
And I want us to get
these jobs at Google.

441
00:17:47,100 --> 00:17:49,167
I'm going to speak
to a manager.

442
00:17:49,169 --> 00:17:51,636
Terrific. I think he's right
over there in the corner.

443
00:17:51,638 --> 00:17:53,905
Let's roll it on over
onto the stomach.

444
00:17:53,907 --> 00:17:55,706
He'll be very helpful.
- Okay, what we're
gonna do here

445
00:17:55,708 --> 00:17:57,775
is get a little support
for the hips.

446
00:17:57,777 --> 00:17:59,710
So here comes... Imagine a
pillow, right like there, okay?

447
00:17:59,712 --> 00:18:00,945
Oh. Uh-huh.

448
00:18:00,947 --> 00:18:02,380
And what we're gonna do
is separate the feet,

449
00:18:02,382 --> 00:18:04,382
create a little heat dispersion.

450
00:18:04,384 --> 00:18:05,783
Excuse me!
- Now, so we have...

451
00:18:05,785 --> 00:18:08,820
Is there something
I can help you with, ma'am?!

452
00:18:09,688 --> 00:18:10,721
What?!

453
00:18:10,723 --> 00:18:12,390
I'm trying to buy a mattress.

454
00:18:12,392 --> 00:18:13,791
Unbelievable!

455
00:18:13,793 --> 00:18:15,760
Listen, our interview
is in one hour.

456
00:18:15,762 --> 00:18:18,229
Now, Nick, this might be
the last chance that we got.

457
00:18:18,231 --> 00:18:21,699
How's it going, Gossip Girls?
CW just called; you're canceled.

458
00:18:21,701 --> 00:18:22,600
Excuse me?

459
00:18:22,602 --> 00:18:23,968
Look, I know you're peddling him

460
00:18:23,970 --> 00:18:26,537
a bunch of crap,
just like the crap merchandise

461
00:18:26,539 --> 00:18:27,638
you two used to shill.

462
00:18:27,640 --> 00:18:29,574
So, listen up, Marfan Syndrome.

463
00:18:29,576 --> 00:18:31,175
Excuse me?
- Marfansism.

464
00:18:31,177 --> 00:18:32,310
Big man's disease.

465
00:18:32,312 --> 00:18:33,478
The Giant Killer.

466
00:18:33,480 --> 00:18:35,246
You.
- Me and you
are the same height.

467
00:18:35,248 --> 00:18:37,548
We're not the same height.
We're not the same height.

468
00:18:37,550 --> 00:18:39,350
I'm handsome tall.

469
00:18:39,352 --> 00:18:41,886
You're the type of tall where
you walk through the airport,

470
00:18:41,888 --> 00:18:44,155
people stop what they're eating
and look at you.

471
00:18:44,157 --> 00:18:45,690
You're like a freak.

472
00:18:45,692 --> 00:18:47,425
Now, Nick,
you have a customer waiting.

473
00:18:47,427 --> 00:18:50,728
Nick... we have
our future waiting.

474
00:18:50,730 --> 00:18:52,096
Nick, you know what that says?

475
00:18:52,098 --> 00:18:53,731
No, I don't read Sanskrit.

476
00:18:53,733 --> 00:18:56,167
"Make reasonable choices."

477
00:18:56,169 --> 00:18:59,370
That's an odd thing
to get tattooed on your neck.

478
00:18:59,372 --> 00:19:02,707
Just get back to work!

479
00:19:02,709 --> 00:19:04,876
God! I'm sorry
you had to see that, ma'am.

480
00:19:04,878 --> 00:19:06,777
Now, let's get back to you

481
00:19:06,779 --> 00:19:08,112
and talk pelvic ventilation.

482
00:19:08,114 --> 00:19:09,113
Kevin!

483
00:19:09,115 --> 00:19:11,082
What?

484
00:19:11,084 --> 00:19:12,350
You know, you've been saying

485
00:19:12,352 --> 00:19:13,951
some insulting things
to me all day.

486
00:19:13,953 --> 00:19:15,153
What are you doing?

487
00:19:15,155 --> 00:19:16,587
I'm taking the shirt off.

488
00:19:16,589 --> 00:19:17,655
Because I don't know

489
00:19:17,657 --> 00:19:18,956
what happens
to a dream deferred.

490
00:19:18,958 --> 00:19:22,059
Does it dry up like
a raisin in the sun?

491
00:19:22,061 --> 00:19:24,061
Or does it explode?

492
00:19:24,063 --> 00:19:25,997
I don't want to find out.

493
00:19:27,499 --> 00:19:29,634
You just made the worst mistake
of your life, my friend.

494
00:19:29,636 --> 00:19:31,702
Hey, hey-hey-hey-hey,
yeah, hey!

495
00:19:31,704 --> 00:19:33,871
You take the shirt off,
it doesn't go back on, okay?

496
00:19:33,873 --> 00:19:35,973
There's not a second chance!

497
00:19:38,010 --> 00:19:39,544
See you in hell!

498
00:19:41,313 --> 00:19:42,647
So we're meeting our
interviewer in here?

499
00:19:42,649 --> 00:19:44,248
No, not in here.
We're meeting him in here.

500
00:19:44,250 --> 00:19:45,383
It's a Hangout.

501
00:19:45,385 --> 00:19:46,817
This is how people
do it now, Nicky...

502
00:19:46,819 --> 00:19:48,519
they have their interviews
on the Internet.
- Oh.

503
00:19:48,521 --> 00:19:49,820
I like it.

504
00:19:49,822 --> 00:19:52,490
Now, it says here
that the internship

505
00:19:52,492 --> 00:19:54,392
is only for college
students, so...

506
00:19:54,394 --> 00:19:56,027
Guess who's way ahead of you.

507
00:19:56,029 --> 00:19:58,829
That's why I enrolled us
at the University of Phoenix.

508
00:19:58,831 --> 00:20:00,498
That proud online institution.

509
00:20:00,500 --> 00:20:01,732
Go, Fighting Phoenixes.

510
00:20:01,734 --> 00:20:02,767
Nice.

511
00:20:02,769 --> 00:20:05,036
Wait, you put my major
down as physics?

512
00:20:05,038 --> 00:20:06,671
Why-why would you put
my major down as...

513
00:20:06,673 --> 00:20:07,705
I don't know shit
about physics.

514
00:20:07,707 --> 00:20:09,240
Look...
- Physics scares me.

515
00:20:09,242 --> 00:20:11,542
These guys paint the corner
of the plate with their pitches.

516
00:20:11,544 --> 00:20:13,377
They're not gonna come
straight down the middle

517
00:20:13,379 --> 00:20:15,279
and ask you about physics;
it's too obvious.

518
00:20:15,281 --> 00:20:16,547
I took it off the table.

519
00:20:16,549 --> 00:20:17,982
Good. Hide in plain sight.

520
00:20:17,984 --> 00:20:19,617
Yes.

521
00:20:19,619 --> 00:20:21,786
But you put you down for
sales? As your major?

522
00:20:21,788 --> 00:20:22,887
Well, 'cause I'm a talker.

523
00:20:22,889 --> 00:20:24,522
I figure I should
probably dazzle.

524
00:20:24,524 --> 00:20:26,090
I want you to... you know,
I've thought about this.

525
00:20:26,092 --> 00:20:27,925
I just figure, like, hide
your vacancy and let me dazzle.

526
00:20:27,927 --> 00:20:29,193
- Okay, dazzle.
- Are you done yet?

527
00:20:29,195 --> 00:20:30,561
There's a 15-minute limit.

528
00:20:30,563 --> 00:20:32,063
I'm sorry, you know what?

529
00:20:32,065 --> 00:20:33,698
The big boys are gonna need
the computer a little longer,

530
00:20:33,700 --> 00:20:35,066
but maybe we can make this
a win-win for you.

531
00:20:35,068 --> 00:20:36,367
Get yourself a soda pop.

532
00:20:36,369 --> 00:20:37,602
Give her some money, yeah.
Here you go.

533
00:20:37,604 --> 00:20:39,203
Yeah, just go put
some sugar in your body.

534
00:20:39,205 --> 00:20:40,605
Enjoy it.
- What a cute kid.

535
00:20:40,607 --> 00:20:42,273
I'm no child, but, Billy...
- Okay, here they are.

536
00:20:42,275 --> 00:20:43,908
Now, when I hit this, they'll be
able to see us, so come on in,

537
00:20:43,910 --> 00:20:45,476
get in there close so we
can be seen on the Webcam.

538
00:20:45,478 --> 00:20:46,944
See how small the Webcam is?
- They can see us...

539
00:20:46,946 --> 00:20:48,879
No, get cheek to cheek.
Nick, come here, cheek to cheek.

540
00:20:48,881 --> 00:20:50,615
Okay, but don't crowd me.
You're crowding me right now.

541
00:20:50,617 --> 00:20:52,350
Nick, get cheek to cheek.
Will you get your cheek...

542
00:20:52,352 --> 00:20:54,418
Buddy, they can't see us.
- I understand that.
Here we go.

543
00:20:54,420 --> 00:20:56,220
Go cheek to cheek.
Just go like I tell you.
- Okay. Don't yell in my...

544
00:20:56,222 --> 00:20:57,588
Put your fucking cheek
next to mine.
- Yes, yes, I get it.

545
00:20:57,590 --> 00:20:58,756
We can see you guys.

546
00:20:58,758 --> 00:21:00,291
Okay, great!
- Good! You got us?

547
00:21:00,293 --> 00:21:01,559
Hi! My name is Billy!

548
00:21:01,561 --> 00:21:03,427
Uh, we can hear you
fine as well.

549
00:21:03,429 --> 00:21:04,462
Oh, great. Um...
- Good.

550
00:21:04,464 --> 00:21:05,463
Billy McMahon.

551
00:21:05,465 --> 00:21:06,497
Nick Campbell.

552
00:21:06,499 --> 00:21:08,132
I'm Benjamin.
- Allison.

553
00:21:08,134 --> 00:21:09,333
We're thirsty, too.

554
00:21:09,335 --> 00:21:10,568
Okay, slow it down
there, camper.

555
00:21:10,570 --> 00:21:11,569
I'm not an ATM.

556
00:21:11,571 --> 00:21:12,737
I got a job interview here.

557
00:21:12,739 --> 00:21:14,105
Thank you.
- We'll be back.

558
00:21:14,107 --> 00:21:16,173
Okay, easy.
- Are you in a library?

559
00:21:16,175 --> 00:21:17,775
You know, we're in
a program here called...
- We are.

560
00:21:17,777 --> 00:21:18,876
There's some beautiful
little kids here.

561
00:21:18,878 --> 00:21:20,344
Yeah, kids.
Helping kids program...

562
00:21:20,346 --> 00:21:22,179
one of the things we're
involved in... where we take

563
00:21:22,181 --> 00:21:24,715
suburban kids and we teach them
what it's like to be homeless.

564
00:21:24,717 --> 00:21:26,484
Oh, what's it called?
- Oh, it's-it's called, uh...

565
00:21:26,486 --> 00:21:28,219
Attitude Adjustment.
- Attitude Adjustment.

566
00:21:28,221 --> 00:21:29,987
And that's where we are today.
We're helping the kids.

567
00:21:29,989 --> 00:21:31,689
And-and to be honest with you,
we did the interview here

568
00:21:31,691 --> 00:21:33,090
because we wanted to help out,

569
00:21:33,092 --> 00:21:35,092
and also we don't have Webcams
for our computer.

570
00:21:35,094 --> 00:21:36,827
If you don't have
a Webcam on your computer,

571
00:21:36,829 --> 00:21:38,863
what type of computer do you
use for your coding ability?

572
00:21:38,865 --> 00:21:41,198
Coding ability?
- Uh, yeah.

573
00:21:41,200 --> 00:21:43,401
Uh, under computer skills,
you put "C-plus-plus."

574
00:21:43,403 --> 00:21:44,702
That's actually a C-plus.

575
00:21:44,704 --> 00:21:46,137
What's that?
- Well, the second plus is

576
00:21:46,139 --> 00:21:48,406
to reflect my attitude
of how I felt about the C-plus.

577
00:21:48,408 --> 00:21:49,540
But it's a C-plus.

578
00:21:49,542 --> 00:21:50,541
It was a typing class.

579
00:21:50,543 --> 00:21:51,776
You know, same principle,

580
00:21:51,778 --> 00:21:53,444
just not the engine
inside the baby there.

581
00:21:53,446 --> 00:21:54,712
But it was more like
"quick brown fox."

582
00:21:54,714 --> 00:21:55,713
You know, put your hands
in the basin,

583
00:21:55,715 --> 00:21:56,881
and crushing it like that.

584
00:21:56,883 --> 00:21:58,749
But that h-helped me out
a lot when I,

585
00:21:58,751 --> 00:22:00,251
as I started my journey
into computers

586
00:22:00,253 --> 00:22:02,186
because I already knew
where to put my hands, clearly.

587
00:22:02,188 --> 00:22:05,022
Okay, if we could focus on
this now... you are currently

588
00:22:05,024 --> 00:22:07,058
enrolled at the University
of Phoenix online?

589
00:22:07,060 --> 00:22:08,592
Indeed, yes, we are.
- Damn right we are.

590
00:22:08,594 --> 00:22:09,860
Damn right we are.
- It's, uh, the oldest

591
00:22:09,862 --> 00:22:11,529
institution of its
kind, and as such,

592
00:22:11,531 --> 00:22:14,999
many people refer to it as the
Harvard of Internet colleges.

593
00:22:15,001 --> 00:22:16,200
Oh! I hadn't
heard that actually.

594
00:22:16,202 --> 00:22:17,468
I... No.

595
00:22:17,470 --> 00:22:18,836
That-that has not
made it out here,

596
00:22:18,838 --> 00:22:19,837
that reputation.
- Well, we're Phoenix proud.

597
00:22:19,839 --> 00:22:20,838
We're Phoenix proud.

598
00:22:20,840 --> 00:22:22,106
Well, that's fine.

599
00:22:22,108 --> 00:22:23,808
Um, we're gonna ask you
a few questions

600
00:22:23,810 --> 00:22:25,676
that some of our candidates
find a little bit odd.

601
00:22:25,678 --> 00:22:26,677
Let's get weird!

602
00:22:26,679 --> 00:22:28,279
No judgment. Shoot.

603
00:22:28,281 --> 00:22:30,481
You're shrunken down
to the size of nickels

604
00:22:30,483 --> 00:22:32,249
and dropped to the
bottom of a blender.

605
00:22:32,251 --> 00:22:33,517
What do you do?

606
00:22:33,519 --> 00:22:35,553
I-Is there anything
else in the blender?

607
00:22:35,555 --> 00:22:36,787
Uh, I don't know.

608
00:22:36,789 --> 00:22:37,855
Well, that's gonna
make a difference.

609
00:22:37,857 --> 00:22:38,989
Are there ice cubes
to climb on?

610
00:22:38,991 --> 00:22:40,324
Are we working with
a daiquiri here?

611
00:22:40,326 --> 00:22:41,826
Are we throwing
a little rum in?

612
00:22:41,828 --> 00:22:43,361
Are we making a smoothie?
- It's been a long week.

613
00:22:43,363 --> 00:22:45,329
Maybe we want to let these
little guys live a little.

614
00:22:45,331 --> 00:22:46,997
Okay, for the sake of the
argument, let's say it's empty.

615
00:22:46,999 --> 00:22:48,199
Sure.
- Well, in that case,
it's easy, then.

616
00:22:48,201 --> 00:22:49,333
Why?
- I'm sorry?

617
00:22:49,335 --> 00:22:50,768
If we're shrunk down
to the size

618
00:22:50,770 --> 00:22:51,902
of a nickel and there's
no liquid in the blender,

619
00:22:51,904 --> 00:22:53,170
we go ahead
and put it on our backs.

620
00:22:53,172 --> 00:22:54,939
So you take her flat
on your back like this.

621
00:22:54,941 --> 00:22:56,907
Right, right, right. You just
lay back, enjoy that breeze.

622
00:22:56,909 --> 00:22:58,109
Lay stiff as a board,
light as a feather.
- Pretend it's a fan.

623
00:22:58,111 --> 00:22:59,477
Okay, once is...
- And let those blades

624
00:22:59,479 --> 00:23:01,439
just whip all around
you like this.

625
00:23:02,515 --> 00:23:04,215
It's like getting an MRI.
Dazzle, dazzle.

626
00:23:04,217 --> 00:23:05,583
Once this blender's on,
it's on forever.

627
00:23:05,585 --> 00:23:06,784
It's on. Forever.

628
00:23:06,786 --> 00:23:08,352
Respectfully,
I got to disagree.

629
00:23:08,354 --> 00:23:10,955
We sold blenders, and even
the best model in the world

630
00:23:10,957 --> 00:23:12,523
is only gonna run nonstop
for, what, Billy?

631
00:23:12,525 --> 00:23:13,657
Even the Germans,
the Germans could never...

632
00:23:13,659 --> 00:23:15,426
Yeah. Even the
German model.

633
00:23:15,428 --> 00:23:17,361
Even one of those Braun ones,
they're only gonna run nonstop

634
00:23:17,363 --> 00:23:19,563
maybe ten or 11 hours.
So we're getting out,

635
00:23:19,565 --> 00:23:21,198
and when we do,
we're better off for it,

636
00:23:21,200 --> 00:23:22,633
because whatever doesn't
kill you makes you stronger.

637
00:23:22,635 --> 00:23:23,901
But let's just go ahead

638
00:23:23,903 --> 00:23:25,503
and big-picture this
for a second, if I can.

639
00:23:25,505 --> 00:23:27,171
Just like the
founders of Google.

640
00:23:27,173 --> 00:23:28,339
Big-picture Googling.

641
00:23:28,341 --> 00:23:30,975
It's not so much
getting out of the blender;

642
00:23:30,977 --> 00:23:32,643
it's what happens next.

643
00:23:32,645 --> 00:23:34,211
That's the question.

644
00:23:34,213 --> 00:23:36,747
You've got two nickel-sized
men free in the world.

645
00:23:36,749 --> 00:23:38,249
Think of the possibilities.
- I mean, I-I...

646
00:23:38,251 --> 00:23:40,050
off the top of my head,
and I'm just spitballing here.

647
00:23:40,052 --> 00:23:41,819
My head's swimming.
- Sunglass repair?

648
00:23:41,821 --> 00:23:43,454
Yeah, yeah...
- We'd be hell on
those little screws.

649
00:23:43,456 --> 00:23:45,623
Or maybe you stick us in
those submarines that they put

650
00:23:45,625 --> 00:23:47,091
in people's bodies
to fight diseases.

651
00:23:47,093 --> 00:23:48,859
That's cutting-edge
right there.

652
00:23:48,861 --> 00:23:50,394
Okay, you... That's-that's
not a real thing,

653
00:23:50,396 --> 00:23:51,395
the submarines.
- No.

654
00:23:51,397 --> 00:23:52,563
Wait a minute.

655
00:23:52,565 --> 00:23:53,731
I thought we were
stuck in a blender.

656
00:23:53,733 --> 00:23:54,899
Now we're saving lives?
What?!

657
00:23:54,901 --> 00:23:56,434
Uh, what?
- What?

658
00:23:56,436 --> 00:23:57,668
- What?!
- What?!
- What?

659
00:23:57,670 --> 00:23:58,903
Let me just recap this
for you real quick.

660
00:23:58,905 --> 00:23:59,904
We started off
in a blend...
- Yeah.

661
00:23:59,906 --> 00:24:01,105
Now we're saving lives!

662
00:24:01,107 --> 00:24:02,173
- What?!
- What?!

663
00:24:02,175 --> 00:24:04,008
- What? What?
- What?
- Wait a minute!

664
00:24:04,010 --> 00:24:05,811
We were stuck
in a blender...
- What a journey!

665
00:24:05,812 --> 00:24:07,044
And now we saving lives?!

666
00:24:07,046 --> 00:24:08,446
What?!
- You guys led us to this.

667
00:24:08,448 --> 00:24:09,747
Thank you.

668
00:24:09,749 --> 00:24:11,248
I think we've gotten
a little far afield.

669
00:24:11,250 --> 00:24:12,750
Just a little off topic.

670
00:24:12,752 --> 00:24:14,885
Ally, I'll get inside you
and I'll fight for you.

671
00:24:14,887 --> 00:24:16,287
Uh, thank you.
I-I appreciate that, but...

672
00:24:16,289 --> 00:24:17,655
Which one of you...
which one of you is physics?

673
00:24:17,657 --> 00:24:19,223
Mr. Campbell?

674
00:24:19,225 --> 00:24:22,693
You could maybe expound
on this from a physics aspect.

675
00:24:22,695 --> 00:24:23,828
Physics.

676
00:24:23,830 --> 00:24:25,129
Here, here...

677
00:24:25,131 --> 00:24:28,132
Listen, the...
I-I could bend your ear

678
00:24:28,134 --> 00:24:30,701
about physics and various
physical phenomenon,

679
00:24:30,703 --> 00:24:33,170
but the truth is,
we were in a blender.

680
00:24:33,172 --> 00:24:36,273
We lost our jobs,
we'd given up.

681
00:24:36,275 --> 00:24:38,476
So I think we already
answered the question

682
00:24:38,478 --> 00:24:39,777
when we took this interview.

683
00:24:39,779 --> 00:24:42,413
We got ourselves out,
and here we are.

684
00:24:42,415 --> 00:24:45,149
If you guys really want to know
what happens when you take

685
00:24:45,151 --> 00:24:48,652
two guys out of a blender...
I'm sorry, Allison, is it?

686
00:24:48,654 --> 00:24:50,321
Yes.

687
00:24:50,323 --> 00:24:51,689
Then give us a shot.

688
00:24:51,691 --> 00:24:54,124
And I think you'd be
happy that you did.

689
00:24:55,961 --> 00:24:57,895
So, who is our next applicant?

690
00:24:57,897 --> 00:25:00,664
Ah, our two daiquiri men.

691
00:25:00,666 --> 00:25:03,067
So, what are we
thinking... Dana?

692
00:25:03,069 --> 00:25:05,369
You're kidding, right?

693
00:25:05,371 --> 00:25:06,570
No.

694
00:25:06,572 --> 00:25:07,872
Eleanor?

695
00:25:07,874 --> 00:25:10,307
Mmm, they seem like
really nice guys,

696
00:25:10,309 --> 00:25:12,343
but I-I don't
think so.
- Okay. Moving on.

697
00:25:12,345 --> 00:25:13,344
Oh, can I say something?

698
00:25:13,346 --> 00:25:14,678
You can. You will.

699
00:25:14,680 --> 00:25:16,247
We will resent you
for wasting our time,

700
00:25:16,249 --> 00:25:17,848
but please don't let that
stop you.

701
00:25:17,850 --> 00:25:20,317
It's just, diversity is
in our DNA, right?

702
00:25:20,319 --> 00:25:21,852
I thought the goal here

703
00:25:21,854 --> 00:25:24,221
was to find people with a
different way of thinking.

704
00:25:24,223 --> 00:25:25,856
There's plenty of people with
a different way of thinking.

705
00:25:25,858 --> 00:25:27,157
It doesn't mean
that we have to hire them.

706
00:25:27,159 --> 00:25:29,226
Very good point, Dana.
Moving on.

707
00:25:29,228 --> 00:25:30,794
I'm sorry, but you read
their r�sum�s, right?

708
00:25:30,796 --> 00:25:32,863
They have more years

709
00:25:32,865 --> 00:25:34,231
of sales and life experience

710
00:25:34,233 --> 00:25:36,267
than the age
of most of our interns.

711
00:25:36,269 --> 00:25:37,968
Not to mention,
our final judgment

712
00:25:37,970 --> 00:25:40,004
is always based on
the Layover Test, right?

713
00:25:40,006 --> 00:25:41,438
Who would you rather
be stuck next to

714
00:25:41,440 --> 00:25:43,908
at an airport bar
for a six-hour delay?

715
00:25:43,910 --> 00:25:45,809
The ten millionth kid
who knows that if you shrink,

716
00:25:45,811 --> 00:25:46,977
your strength-to-weight ratio

717
00:25:46,979 --> 00:25:49,713
allows you to jump
way higher? Duh.

718
00:25:49,715 --> 00:25:51,215
Or the out-of-the-box thinkers

719
00:25:51,217 --> 00:25:53,250
who turned being
stuck in a blender

720
00:25:53,252 --> 00:25:55,219
into an advantage?

721
00:26:20,947 --> 00:26:23,447
So it begins.

722
00:26:23,449 --> 00:26:24,582
Here we go.

723
00:26:24,584 --> 00:26:25,683
Place is incredible.

724
00:26:25,685 --> 00:26:26,984
Where do we check in?

725
00:26:26,986 --> 00:26:28,385
Let's ask somebody here.

726
00:26:28,387 --> 00:26:29,887
Oh, excuse me!

727
00:26:29,889 --> 00:26:31,589
I'm sorry, excuse me, do you...

728
00:26:34,559 --> 00:26:37,561
Billy?

729
00:26:37,563 --> 00:26:39,930
It's scary because it's new.

730
00:26:39,932 --> 00:26:41,231
Let's go check in.

731
00:26:41,233 --> 00:26:43,567
Head towards those
big, big letters there.

732
00:26:43,569 --> 00:26:45,035
What's up, family?

733
00:27:20,339 --> 00:27:22,640
Picture the greatest
amusement park

734
00:27:22,642 --> 00:27:24,274
you've ever been to as a kid.

735
00:27:24,276 --> 00:27:26,777
Now imagine a place
nothing like it

736
00:27:26,779 --> 00:27:29,113
and a million times better.

737
00:27:29,115 --> 00:27:31,181
That's where we are.

738
00:27:31,183 --> 00:27:32,716
I'm gonna grab us a coffee.

739
00:27:32,718 --> 00:27:33,817
You check us in.

740
00:27:33,819 --> 00:27:35,686
Yeah.

741
00:27:40,792 --> 00:27:42,059
Morning.

742
00:27:42,061 --> 00:27:43,827
Hi.
- What's the damage here?

743
00:27:43,829 --> 00:27:46,830
Nothing.

744
00:27:46,832 --> 00:27:48,098
For the... for these?

745
00:27:48,100 --> 00:27:50,067
Free.
- These are complimentary?

746
00:27:50,069 --> 00:27:51,402
Complimentary. Free.

747
00:27:51,404 --> 00:27:52,836
Whatever you want.

748
00:27:52,838 --> 00:27:54,204
What you're just saying
is if I...

749
00:27:54,206 --> 00:27:55,572
whatever I walk away
with here...

750
00:27:55,574 --> 00:27:56,573
It's free.

751
00:27:56,575 --> 00:27:57,775
Doesn't... yeah.

752
00:27:57,777 --> 00:27:59,343
You can have bananas.

753
00:27:59,345 --> 00:28:01,345
I probably should, only because
it's a great way to st...

754
00:28:01,347 --> 00:28:02,913
This is the most important
meal of the day.

755
00:28:02,915 --> 00:28:04,314
Take two. They're free.

756
00:28:04,316 --> 00:28:06,083
No, I know, but for
my day, I need it.
- Yeah.

757
00:28:06,085 --> 00:28:07,918
What about these...
the bagels and all that?

758
00:28:07,920 --> 00:28:09,119
Yeah, it's free.
Anything you want.

759
00:28:09,121 --> 00:28:10,354
If you're insisting,
twist my arm.

760
00:28:10,356 --> 00:28:11,689
I'll have a couple of them.
- Sure.

761
00:28:11,691 --> 00:28:12,891
Like four-four of them.
- Four?

762
00:28:12,892 --> 00:28:14,058
Well, just whatever it is.
- Yeah.

763
00:28:14,060 --> 00:28:15,526
What about five of them?
- Free, too.

764
00:28:15,528 --> 00:28:17,428
Well, why don't you go ahead
and make it seven, then?

765
00:28:17,430 --> 00:28:19,063
If you want to whip up
some of the other drinks.

766
00:28:19,065 --> 00:28:20,531
Do you have a to-go cup,
like, a Guzzler?
- Sure.

767
00:28:20,533 --> 00:28:22,066
Do you have, like,
a Rednek Guzzler with a straw?

768
00:28:22,068 --> 00:28:23,467
Excuse me. Pardon me.
- Yes?

769
00:28:23,469 --> 00:28:26,603
Do you know what, uh,
launch this was from?

770
00:28:26,605 --> 00:28:28,272
Sorry. Uh, I have a meeting.

771
00:28:28,274 --> 00:28:29,740
Oh, no, no,
I don't want to hold you.

772
00:28:29,742 --> 00:28:31,008
I was just...

773
00:28:31,010 --> 00:28:33,010
I-I was just curious.

774
00:28:33,012 --> 00:28:35,079
Was this thing
actually in space?

775
00:28:35,081 --> 00:28:38,015
If only there were
some Web page you could go to.

776
00:28:38,017 --> 00:28:39,249
Right?
Where you could just

777
00:28:39,251 --> 00:28:41,752
type things in
and search for answers.

778
00:28:41,754 --> 00:28:44,088
Ah. Yes, that
would be nice.

779
00:28:44,090 --> 00:28:46,590
Nick Campbell.

780
00:28:46,592 --> 00:28:47,958
Uh, oops. Intern.

781
00:28:47,960 --> 00:28:50,861
Dana Simms. Late.

782
00:28:50,863 --> 00:28:51,862
Yep, and I'm late, too.

783
00:28:51,864 --> 00:28:52,996
I got to rush off.

784
00:28:52,998 --> 00:28:54,531
And it's <i>SpaceShipOne.</i>

785
00:28:54,533 --> 00:28:56,667
First private
manned spaceflight.

786
00:28:56,669 --> 00:28:58,669
Winner of the X Prize.

787
00:29:06,711 --> 00:29:08,145
Oh, my God,
are those your dads?

788
00:29:08,147 --> 00:29:10,714
Seriously, same-sex partners
make excellent parents.

789
00:29:10,716 --> 00:29:12,516
I so wish my parents were gay.

790
00:29:12,518 --> 00:29:13,951
When did 20 start
to look like 12?

791
00:29:13,953 --> 00:29:15,385
Oh, man.

792
00:29:15,387 --> 00:29:16,988
Yes, of course
I'll work my hardest.

793
00:29:16,989 --> 00:29:18,522
Mom, how can I work
harder than my hardest?

794
00:29:18,524 --> 00:29:20,190
That's physically impossible...

795
00:29:20,192 --> 00:29:21,992
Okay, okay, I-I will.

796
00:29:21,994 --> 00:29:24,461
Yes, I love you... Mom.

797
00:29:24,463 --> 00:29:25,863
Billy McMahon, Billy McMahon.
- Nice to meet you.

798
00:29:25,865 --> 00:29:27,231
How are you?

799
00:29:27,233 --> 00:29:28,665
Oh, I'm gonna grab
some food over here.

800
00:29:28,667 --> 00:29:30,067
You okay?
- Get something.
I'm good.

801
00:29:30,069 --> 00:29:31,989
You all right if I leave you?
- Yeah.

802
00:29:33,638 --> 00:29:35,439
This stuff looks good, huh?

803
00:29:35,441 --> 00:29:36,807
Little pick-me-up.
- Excuse me. Sir.

804
00:29:36,809 --> 00:29:38,308
Graham Hawtrey.
- Oh.

805
00:29:38,310 --> 00:29:39,810
Billy McMahon.
- I'm so thrilled
to be here.

806
00:29:39,812 --> 00:29:40,878
Oh, me, too.

807
00:29:40,880 --> 00:29:42,513
Feels kind of like
the first day

808
00:29:42,515 --> 00:29:44,595
of spring training
for Little League here.

809
00:29:46,418 --> 00:29:49,052
I got to tell you, I feel like
I got a few more clicks

810
00:29:49,054 --> 00:29:50,587
on the old odometer
than most of you kids here.

811
00:29:50,589 --> 00:29:52,222
Well, honestly,
that's why I came over here.

812
00:29:52,224 --> 00:29:53,690
I said to myself,
"Graham, there's a man

813
00:29:53,692 --> 00:29:54,858
"with some life experience.

814
00:29:54,860 --> 00:29:56,160
Probably teach you
a thing or two."

815
00:29:56,162 --> 00:29:57,628
Oh, you got to meet
my friend, Nicky.

816
00:29:57,630 --> 00:29:58,428
You'll love him. Nicky!

817
00:29:58,430 --> 00:29:59,763
Nickelodeon!
Come over here!

818
00:29:59,765 --> 00:30:00,764
Come over.

819
00:30:00,766 --> 00:30:02,232
Come meet this guy, Graham.

820
00:30:02,234 --> 00:30:03,333
He's in the internship
program with me and you.

821
00:30:03,335 --> 00:30:04,334
Hey. How you doing?
- Good.

822
00:30:04,336 --> 00:30:06,036
You're interns?
- Yes.

823
00:30:06,038 --> 00:30:07,838
Shut up!
- Deal with it.

824
00:30:07,840 --> 00:30:09,706
Shut the fuck up.
- Deal with it.

825
00:30:09,708 --> 00:30:11,008
But you're so old, though.

826
00:30:11,010 --> 00:30:12,476
Whoa. Excuse me?

827
00:30:12,478 --> 00:30:14,545
Oh, my God, I feel terrible!
I feel so stupid.

828
00:30:14,547 --> 00:30:16,246
No, don't be. We're excited.
- No, it's fine.

829
00:30:16,248 --> 00:30:18,215
- No, I feel terrible.
I feel terrible.
- No. For what?

830
00:30:18,217 --> 00:30:20,117
I just, you know, um...
I thought you were important.

831
00:30:20,119 --> 00:30:21,518
Oh, shit.

832
00:30:21,520 --> 00:30:23,554
I've got to find some people
who actually matter,

833
00:30:23,556 --> 00:30:24,822
but good luck!

834
00:30:24,824 --> 00:30:27,257
Wh-Why did you bring me over
to introduce me to this guy?

835
00:30:27,259 --> 00:30:28,725
It's like he was
your best friend.

836
00:30:28,727 --> 00:30:30,127
You introduced me to Hitler.

837
00:30:30,129 --> 00:30:32,262
Well, he seemed like
he was sweet at first.

838
00:30:32,264 --> 00:30:33,797
My name is Roger Chetty.

839
00:30:33,799 --> 00:30:36,667
And I am head
of the Google Intern Program.

840
00:30:36,669 --> 00:30:39,269
Welcome to Google.

841
00:30:39,271 --> 00:30:41,839
This will not be
your average internship.

842
00:30:41,841 --> 00:30:43,640
Oh, no.

843
00:30:43,642 --> 00:30:45,509
You will do what we do.

844
00:30:45,511 --> 00:30:48,679
And we will watch
how well you do it.

845
00:30:48,681 --> 00:30:51,381
Now, you represent
the finest schools.

846
00:30:51,383 --> 00:30:54,284
Your intelligence,
your achievement is well noted,

847
00:30:54,286 --> 00:30:56,153
but to excel at this internship,

848
00:30:56,155 --> 00:30:59,022
you're going to need
far more than brainpower.

849
00:30:59,024 --> 00:31:02,759
What you're going to need
is Googliness.

850
00:31:04,496 --> 00:31:05,629
Nothing funny.

851
00:31:05,631 --> 00:31:06,864
Googliness.

852
00:31:06,866 --> 00:31:11,802
The intangible stuff
that made a search engine

853
00:31:11,804 --> 00:31:13,971
into an engine for change.

854
00:31:13,973 --> 00:31:17,407
Now, you will be
divided into teams,

855
00:31:17,409 --> 00:31:18,976
and by the end of the summer,

856
00:31:18,978 --> 00:31:23,046
only one team will be guaranteed
a full-time position.

857
00:31:23,048 --> 00:31:28,352
The other 95% of you will not.

858
00:31:28,354 --> 00:31:30,220
Now, you've been split up
into several seminars

859
00:31:30,222 --> 00:31:33,357
to acquaint you
with our campus and culture.

860
00:31:33,359 --> 00:31:35,726
Seminar descriptions have been
e-mailed to each of you.

861
00:31:35,728 --> 00:31:39,196
I would wish you luck,
but it's not luck that you need.

862
00:31:39,198 --> 00:31:41,365
Get to work!

863
00:31:41,367 --> 00:31:42,699
Well, this ain't gonna be about

864
00:31:42,701 --> 00:31:44,701
getting coffee
and running errands for people.

865
00:31:44,703 --> 00:31:45,936
No, no.

866
00:31:45,938 --> 00:31:47,804
We're looking at some sort
of mental Hunger Games

867
00:31:47,806 --> 00:31:50,307
against a bunch of genius kids
for just a handful of jobs.

868
00:31:50,309 --> 00:31:51,475
That's why we got
to nail this thing.

869
00:31:51,477 --> 00:31:52,677
This is our opening statement.

870
00:31:52,678 --> 00:31:53,744
If it please the court.

871
00:31:53,746 --> 00:31:55,379
Oh, it pleases
the court, counselor.

872
00:31:55,381 --> 00:31:56,747
<i>Okay, Workplace Seminar.</i>

873
00:31:56,749 --> 00:31:57,881
<i>Still a few seats left.</i>

874
00:31:58,950 --> 00:32:00,050
First impression time, baby.

875
00:32:00,052 --> 00:32:01,218
Bingo!

876
00:32:01,220 --> 00:32:02,152
Okay, we can do good in this.

877
00:32:02,154 --> 00:32:03,487
We have to do...
- Shazam!

878
00:32:03,489 --> 00:32:05,188
So close yet so far, boys.

879
00:32:05,190 --> 00:32:06,957
Whoa! Graham, Graham,
we were here first.

880
00:32:06,959 --> 00:32:07,958
You know what?

881
00:32:07,960 --> 00:32:09,159
You're right.

882
00:32:09,161 --> 00:32:10,227
You guys could use
the advantage.

883
00:32:10,229 --> 00:32:11,328
Go ahead.

884
00:32:11,330 --> 00:32:12,763
What's that supposed to mean?

885
00:32:12,765 --> 00:32:15,265
It means that in a world
of excellence,

886
00:32:15,267 --> 00:32:18,101
old and unexceptional
qualifies as diversity.

887
00:32:18,103 --> 00:32:19,703
So you know what?
Go ahead.

888
00:32:19,705 --> 00:32:20,704
What's that saying?

889
00:32:20,706 --> 00:32:22,706
"Age before beauty"?

890
00:32:22,708 --> 00:32:24,508
Thank you.

891
00:32:24,510 --> 00:32:26,510
You're welcome, William.

892
00:32:26,512 --> 00:32:28,245
You know, there's always
some joker

893
00:32:28,247 --> 00:32:30,347
who likes to play fuck-around.

894
00:32:30,349 --> 00:32:32,649
I guess that's
gonna be you, Graham.

895
00:32:32,651 --> 00:32:35,052
All right, at least we know.
Game on.

896
00:32:35,054 --> 00:32:36,820
Good luck, boys.

897
00:32:36,822 --> 00:32:39,323
Now, I recognize that Google
is not a conventional workplace.

898
00:32:39,325 --> 00:32:42,392
Having said that,
we have rules.

899
00:32:42,394 --> 00:32:45,128
I'm going to ask you
a series of questions.

900
00:32:45,130 --> 00:32:46,530
You are going to raise
the green paddle

901
00:32:46,532 --> 00:32:49,299
to indicate "yes"
and the red paddle

902
00:32:49,301 --> 00:32:52,135
to indicate "no."

903
00:32:52,137 --> 00:32:53,937
So, let's begin.

904
00:32:53,939 --> 00:32:56,606
"Having a beer
with your boss."

905
00:32:58,443 --> 00:33:01,545
Some of you are under 21.

906
00:33:01,547 --> 00:33:03,113
Some of us
aren't under 21, so...

907
00:33:03,115 --> 00:33:04,514
if you want to grab
a cold one with me,

908
00:33:04,516 --> 00:33:05,882
I'm happy to do that with you.

909
00:33:05,884 --> 00:33:08,285
I will not be grabbing
a cold one with you.

910
00:33:08,287 --> 00:33:09,419
You get high?

911
00:33:09,421 --> 00:33:11,054
I don't get high.
- Okay.

912
00:33:11,056 --> 00:33:12,656
I'm not judging;
I'm just saying,

913
00:33:12,658 --> 00:33:13,457
people do it.

914
00:33:13,459 --> 00:33:14,791
That being said, if you want

915
00:33:14,793 --> 00:33:16,693
something cold to drink,
we'll hook you up.

916
00:33:16,695 --> 00:33:17,761
I'm okay.

917
00:33:17,763 --> 00:33:19,363
Thank you; just
stop talking to me.

918
00:33:19,365 --> 00:33:21,698
I'm your Bill Holden
in <i>Stalag 17.</i>

919
00:33:21,700 --> 00:33:23,900
I don't even... I really
don't get that reference.

920
00:33:23,902 --> 00:33:26,970
Google it.
- Got it.

921
00:33:26,972 --> 00:33:30,807
"Dating a fellow intern."

922
00:33:30,809 --> 00:33:33,944
This is Google,
not Match.com.

923
00:33:33,946 --> 00:33:36,380
Chetty, excuse me.
What about a full-time employee?

924
00:33:36,382 --> 00:33:38,582
Say, management level,
but not a direct supervisor.

925
00:33:38,584 --> 00:33:43,286
Great eyes,
and a severity to her look

926
00:33:43,288 --> 00:33:46,456
that is surprisingly sexy.

927
00:33:46,458 --> 00:33:48,558
What's the policy on that?

928
00:33:48,560 --> 00:33:50,260
No? That's frowned upon also?

929
00:33:50,262 --> 00:33:51,395
So we'll say no to love?

930
00:33:51,397 --> 00:33:52,496
We'll say no to love, yes.

931
00:33:52,498 --> 00:33:53,764
That's gonna be a no.
- Now,

932
00:33:53,766 --> 00:33:56,867
"taking food home
from the office."

933
00:33:56,869 --> 00:33:57,901
Boom.

934
00:33:57,903 --> 00:33:59,169
Yes.

935
00:33:59,171 --> 00:34:00,203
Are you having
difficulty with this,

936
00:34:00,205 --> 00:34:01,638
Mr. McMahon?
- I'm sorry.

937
00:34:01,640 --> 00:34:02,773
Just to drill down on this,
what if it's,

938
00:34:02,775 --> 00:34:04,374
like, a perishable?
Like, say there was

939
00:34:04,376 --> 00:34:05,809
a pudding or something
that was left out.

940
00:34:05,811 --> 00:34:07,644
You'd like to take home
a pudding, would you?

941
00:34:07,646 --> 00:34:09,312
I wouldn't mind taking home
a pudding; I don't...

942
00:34:09,314 --> 00:34:10,814
I don't know
who wouldn't.
- Oh, yeah.

943
00:34:10,816 --> 00:34:12,649
But that being said,
I'm just saying if it's gonna

944
00:34:12,651 --> 00:34:14,284
go bad, is that okay
to take-take it home?
- Mm-hmm.

945
00:34:14,286 --> 00:34:15,752
Mm-hmm. Anything else
you'd like to take home?

946
00:34:15,754 --> 00:34:17,354
Only if there was, let's say,
salsa or chips.

947
00:34:17,356 --> 00:34:18,555
You know,
something that's not wrapped.

948
00:34:18,557 --> 00:34:19,923
Salsa, chips and pudding.

949
00:34:19,925 --> 00:34:20,724
Or sushi.

950
00:34:20,726 --> 00:34:22,259
Salsa, chips, pudding and sushi.

951
00:34:22,261 --> 00:34:23,627
Anything else?
- Ice cream.

952
00:34:23,629 --> 00:34:25,629
Salsa, chips, pudding,
sushi and ice cream.

953
00:34:25,631 --> 00:34:27,497
Pizza.
- Salsa, chips, pudding,

954
00:34:27,499 --> 00:34:28,799
sushi, ice cream and pizza.

955
00:34:28,801 --> 00:34:30,167
I wouldn't take home
a frozen pizza,

956
00:34:30,169 --> 00:34:31,301
but if there was a nice pie

957
00:34:31,303 --> 00:34:32,636
that was out...
- Oh, boy.

958
00:34:32,638 --> 00:34:36,473
I am truly impressed,
Mr. McMahon.

959
00:34:36,475 --> 00:34:38,909
Thank you.
- At the both of you.

960
00:34:38,911 --> 00:34:42,012
At how quickly you have
confirmed my doubts about you.

961
00:34:42,014 --> 00:34:44,781
Now, let's try this

962
00:34:44,783 --> 00:34:45,882
one more time.

963
00:34:47,185 --> 00:34:51,955
"Taking food home
from the office."

964
00:34:52,957 --> 00:34:54,591
Very good.

965
00:34:58,296 --> 00:35:00,931
Ladies and gentlemen,
that is all.

966
00:35:09,273 --> 00:35:11,274
Well, I'm not
gonna dress it up.

967
00:35:11,276 --> 00:35:13,276
Today didn't go well.

968
00:35:13,278 --> 00:35:14,611
Yeah.

969
00:35:14,613 --> 00:35:16,813
It certainly wasn't
the first impression

970
00:35:16,815 --> 00:35:18,115
we were looking for.

971
00:35:20,151 --> 00:35:22,219
But here's the deal.

972
00:35:22,221 --> 00:35:24,521
Tomorrow is
the pick teams day, right?

973
00:35:24,523 --> 00:35:26,890
Which makes it
all the more important

974
00:35:26,892 --> 00:35:29,159
for us to fall in
with a strong team.

975
00:35:29,161 --> 00:35:30,894
If we can surround ourselves

976
00:35:30,896 --> 00:35:32,596
with the right group
of these little geniuses,

977
00:35:32,598 --> 00:35:35,165
we still got a shot here.

978
00:35:35,167 --> 00:35:37,167
Nicky,

979
00:35:37,169 --> 00:35:38,902
we can coattail this bitch.

980
00:35:38,904 --> 00:35:41,538
You're right, and by the way,
there's no shame in that.

981
00:35:41,540 --> 00:35:42,973
No.
- There's no shame

982
00:35:42,975 --> 00:35:45,342
in being the 12th man
at the end of the bench

983
00:35:45,344 --> 00:35:46,643
who's never getting
in the game,

984
00:35:46,645 --> 00:35:47,811
but he's got a lot
of enthusiasm.

985
00:35:47,813 --> 00:35:49,513
Right.
- He's waving the towel,

986
00:35:49,515 --> 00:35:50,814
he's doling out high fives
during time-outs.

987
00:35:50,816 --> 00:35:51,915
Exactly.

988
00:35:51,917 --> 00:35:53,717
Because I'll tell you
about that guy.

989
00:35:53,719 --> 00:35:55,986
When the team wins
the championship,

990
00:35:55,988 --> 00:35:57,454
he still gets a ring.

991
00:35:57,456 --> 00:35:58,922
Damn right he does.

992
00:35:58,924 --> 00:36:01,324
So we got to be
that awkward seven-footer

993
00:36:01,326 --> 00:36:02,325
from Lithuania.

994
00:36:02,327 --> 00:36:03,593
I love your spirit.

995
00:36:03,595 --> 00:36:05,228
Look, I love you like a brother,

996
00:36:05,230 --> 00:36:06,730
but I can't have
those cold clams

997
00:36:06,732 --> 00:36:08,765
brushing up against me
in the bed here at night.

998
00:36:08,767 --> 00:36:10,700
Keep me up all night.
- Okay, suit yourself.

999
00:36:10,702 --> 00:36:12,569
I'm gonna give you the bed;
I'll take her tomorrow.

1000
00:36:12,571 --> 00:36:16,006
<i>Can you hit that light,</i>
<i>Pocahontas?</i>

1001
00:36:16,008 --> 00:36:18,341
<i>Tomorrow's a new day.</i>

1002
00:36:18,343 --> 00:36:21,044
<i>Welcome to day two. I am Sid,</i>

1003
00:36:21,046 --> 00:36:22,345
eighth-year Googler.

1004
00:36:22,347 --> 00:36:25,015
You guys are new Googlers;

1005
00:36:25,017 --> 00:36:26,483
thus you're... Nooglers.

1006
00:36:26,485 --> 00:36:28,618
- Okay.

1007
00:36:28,620 --> 00:36:31,421
Now, this place is all about
community and collaboration.

1008
00:36:31,423 --> 00:36:33,823
So you'll be working in teams

1009
00:36:33,825 --> 00:36:35,225
from here on out. All right.

1010
00:36:35,227 --> 00:36:36,493
You have five minutes.

1011
00:36:36,495 --> 00:36:37,494
Pick your teams.

1012
00:36:37,496 --> 00:36:39,162
You, on me.

1013
00:36:39,164 --> 00:36:40,330
Oh, now, be picky, okay?

1014
00:36:40,332 --> 00:36:41,598
Play hard to get.

1015
00:36:41,600 --> 00:36:43,033
Don't be desperate;
just be cool, okay?

1016
00:36:43,035 --> 00:36:44,267
This is everything.

1017
00:36:44,269 --> 00:36:45,835
Are you still looking
for someone?

1018
00:36:45,837 --> 00:36:47,704
I could be
your teammate.
- College, major, S.A.T. score?

1019
00:36:47,706 --> 00:36:49,706
Um, Harvard,
computer science, 2390.

1020
00:36:49,708 --> 00:36:51,107
Fine. On me, Fatface.

1021
00:36:51,109 --> 00:36:52,175
Uh, my name's Zach, not...

1022
00:36:52,177 --> 00:36:53,276
You?
- University of...

1023
00:36:53,278 --> 00:36:54,344
No.

1024
00:36:54,346 --> 00:36:55,645
My name's not Fat...

1025
00:36:55,647 --> 00:36:57,914
Hello, Stanford.
You're coming with me.

1026
00:36:57,916 --> 00:36:59,849
The University
of Phoenix online.

1027
00:36:59,851 --> 00:37:01,384
Sort of considered
the Harvard of the West.

1028
00:37:01,386 --> 00:37:02,586
Why don't we all be a team?

1029
00:37:02,588 --> 00:37:04,387
Why don't we all be a team?

1030
00:37:04,389 --> 00:37:05,789
Why don't we all be a team?

1031
00:37:05,791 --> 00:37:07,390
Can I just get...
Oh, please don't touch me.

1032
00:37:07,392 --> 00:37:08,525
Please,
you-you're touching me.

1033
00:37:08,527 --> 00:37:09,826
Blondie, you're coming with me

1034
00:37:09,828 --> 00:37:11,561
on account
of your physical appearance.

1035
00:37:11,563 --> 00:37:14,130
Does anyone want to...
want to be on a team with me?

1036
00:37:14,132 --> 00:37:15,665
Super fun.

1037
00:37:15,667 --> 00:37:17,834
Really smart, but also very fun.

1038
00:37:17,836 --> 00:37:20,537
I was voted "most likely to
succeed" in my chess club.

1039
00:37:27,111 --> 00:37:29,112
Um, Mr. Chetty?

1040
00:37:29,114 --> 00:37:31,615
I don't have a group.

1041
00:37:31,617 --> 00:37:33,617
You'll mentor the leftovers.

1042
00:37:33,619 --> 00:37:35,485
Which, it would seem,
would include

1043
00:37:35,487 --> 00:37:37,320
your two charity cases.

1044
00:37:37,322 --> 00:37:38,989
Nice.
- Off you go.

1045
00:37:38,991 --> 00:37:40,924
Go.

1046
00:37:44,195 --> 00:37:45,495
Yo, Billy and Nick?

1047
00:37:45,497 --> 00:37:47,364
- Hey.
- Hi.
- Nice, there they are.

1048
00:37:47,366 --> 00:37:48,632
Nice to meet you.
I'm Lyle,

1049
00:37:48,634 --> 00:37:50,634
one of the team
managers. Pound me.

1050
00:37:50,636 --> 00:37:52,569
Oh, normally,
just putting the-the fist out

1051
00:37:52,571 --> 00:37:54,504
without the words
is all that's necessary.

1052
00:37:54,506 --> 00:37:56,606
Come on, bro, fist me;
get up in there.

1053
00:37:56,608 --> 00:37:58,742
Yeah,
that's definitely not right.

1054
00:37:58,744 --> 00:38:00,443
I-I'm sorry,
you said you were a-a manager?

1055
00:38:00,445 --> 00:38:01,544
How old are you?

1056
00:38:01,546 --> 00:38:03,813
I'm 23, but no worries, fellas.

1057
00:38:03,815 --> 00:38:05,448
I'm an old soul.
- Yeah, that's great.

1058
00:38:05,450 --> 00:38:07,417
Um, yeah, well,
the thing about it is, pal,

1059
00:38:07,419 --> 00:38:09,853
is that, um, we don't have a...
well, we have two... me and...

1060
00:38:09,855 --> 00:38:11,888
me and Nick... but we don't have
the rest of our team.

1061
00:38:11,890 --> 00:38:13,356
We didn't...
- But we figured...

1062
00:38:13,358 --> 00:38:15,325
you didn't have a team,

1063
00:38:15,327 --> 00:38:17,060
but you got one now, son.

1064
00:38:17,062 --> 00:38:18,495
'Cause I got a few outliers.

1065
00:38:18,497 --> 00:38:20,997
Buh-bam, ker-plash, zshaw!

1066
00:38:20,999 --> 00:38:23,066
And we about to get it all good
up in this hood, right?

1067
00:38:23,068 --> 00:38:24,734
Outliers?

1068
00:38:24,736 --> 00:38:27,003
Outliers, 'cause I just dropped
a little G-well on you.

1069
00:38:27,005 --> 00:38:29,472
'Cause Malcolm's my dog,
Malcolm's my dog.

1070
00:38:29,474 --> 00:38:31,441
What you say...
Malcolm's my dog.

1071
00:38:31,443 --> 00:38:33,276
<i>Outliers,</i> you know,
from 10,000 hours?

1072
00:38:33,278 --> 00:38:35,845
Look, let's get
a team meeting going, everybody!

1073
00:38:35,847 --> 00:38:37,113
Come on, team meet time.

1074
00:38:37,115 --> 00:38:39,816
Nick?
- Wonder Twin
powers activate!

1075
00:38:39,818 --> 00:38:42,018
- What other options do we have?
- Let's go, everybody!

1076
00:38:42,020 --> 00:38:43,687
Come on, you're with me!
You're with me.

1077
00:38:43,689 --> 00:38:45,188
Uh...
- My team, corner pocket.

1078
00:38:45,190 --> 00:38:48,091
All right, let's get some
meet and greet going

1079
00:38:48,093 --> 00:38:49,592
up in this heezy.

1080
00:38:49,594 --> 00:38:51,428
I'm Lyle,
and it's pretty much WYSIWYG...

1081
00:38:51,430 --> 00:38:52,796
"what you see is what you get."

1082
00:38:52,798 --> 00:38:54,864
I've been here at the Goog
for four years,

1083
00:38:54,866 --> 00:38:57,233
working on seven projies

1084
00:38:57,235 --> 00:38:58,501
<i>en este momento.</i>

1085
00:38:58,503 --> 00:39:00,503
Wow, seven projects?

1086
00:39:00,505 --> 00:39:01,905
Hey, they ask, and I do's it.

1087
00:39:01,907 --> 00:39:03,673
What can I say,
I'm a people pleaser,

1088
00:39:03,675 --> 00:39:04,708
especially the ladies.

1089
00:39:04,710 --> 00:39:06,076
My Mercedes.

1090
00:39:06,078 --> 00:39:07,877
So it's all good
in Lyle's hood, you heard?

1091
00:39:07,879 --> 00:39:09,679
Uh, yeah, is Lyle always

1092
00:39:09,681 --> 00:39:11,481
gonna be referring to himself
in the third person?

1093
00:39:11,483 --> 00:39:13,650
'Cause if he is, I might want
to punch Lyle in the face.

1094
00:39:13,652 --> 00:39:14,651
Okay, tough but fair.

1095
00:39:14,653 --> 00:39:16,019
Good note.

1096
00:39:16,021 --> 00:39:17,687
Lyle's still a little nervous.
Shh...

1097
00:39:17,689 --> 00:39:19,689
Uh, first-time manager;
Lyle's a first-time...

1098
00:39:19,691 --> 00:39:21,424
I'm gonna stop doing that.
I'm gonna cut it out.

1099
00:39:21,426 --> 00:39:23,193
Keep it to first
and second person.

1100
00:39:23,195 --> 00:39:25,595
Who's next?

1101
00:39:25,597 --> 00:39:28,598
My name is Yo-Yo Santos.

1102
00:39:28,600 --> 00:39:29,733
Yo-Yo, how about a high five?

1103
00:39:29,735 --> 00:39:30,867
Whoa.
- Whoa.

1104
00:39:30,869 --> 00:39:32,936
Yo-Yo, easy, buddy.
I come in peace.

1105
00:39:32,938 --> 00:39:34,437
Geez, Yo-Yo,
did you get

1106
00:39:34,439 --> 00:39:35,705
beat up a lot in school?

1107
00:39:35,707 --> 00:39:37,574
I was homeschooled by my mom.

1108
00:39:37,576 --> 00:39:38,775
Did you get beat up

1109
00:39:38,777 --> 00:39:40,176
a lot in homeschool?

1110
00:39:40,178 --> 00:39:42,345
Discipline is a very
important part of growth.

1111
00:39:42,347 --> 00:39:43,346
But my mother was actually

1112
00:39:43,348 --> 00:39:44,581
a very nurturing person.

1113
00:39:44,583 --> 00:39:45,982
For example, she
provided me selflessly

1114
00:39:45,984 --> 00:39:47,650
with the milk of her bosom

1115
00:39:47,652 --> 00:39:49,285
until I was seven years old.

1116
00:39:49,287 --> 00:39:50,787
So it's like, uh,

1117
00:39:50,789 --> 00:39:52,555
you're tying your shoe,
you're climbing trees,

1118
00:39:52,557 --> 00:39:54,624
you're blowing up fireworks,
and then you're right on Mom.

1119
00:39:54,626 --> 00:39:55,825
You got mouth on Mom.

1120
00:39:55,827 --> 00:39:57,694
Breast-feeding leads
to a higher IQ.

1121
00:39:57,696 --> 00:39:58,862
Okay.
Actually,
the science

1122
00:39:58,864 --> 00:40:01,197
isn't quite definitive on that.

1123
00:40:01,199 --> 00:40:02,565
I was bottle-fed.

1124
00:40:02,567 --> 00:40:03,633
It never slowed me down.

1125
00:40:03,635 --> 00:40:04,968
Vitamins are vitamins,

1126
00:40:04,970 --> 00:40:08,138
whether they come
from a teat or a baba.

1127
00:40:08,140 --> 00:40:09,672
Wrong.

1128
00:40:09,674 --> 00:40:10,974
Sorry, what was that?

1129
00:40:10,976 --> 00:40:12,108
Wrong.

1130
00:40:12,110 --> 00:40:13,777
The teat or baba thing,
it's wrong.

1131
00:40:13,779 --> 00:40:15,739
I just Googled it,
so you're wrong.

1132
00:40:16,547 --> 00:40:18,114
Oh, yeah, I'm Stuart.

1133
00:40:18,116 --> 00:40:19,649
Well, it's a pleasure

1134
00:40:19,651 --> 00:40:20,917
to meet you, Stu.
You know, you can't trust

1135
00:40:20,919 --> 00:40:22,519
everything you read on the...

1136
00:40:22,521 --> 00:40:24,587
The <i>Journal of the American</i>
<i>Medical Association?</i>

1137
00:40:24,589 --> 00:40:25,688
Sounds pretty trustworthy.

1138
00:40:25,690 --> 00:40:26,790
It says that breast milk

1139
00:40:26,792 --> 00:40:27,857
has more nutrients

1140
00:40:27,859 --> 00:40:29,926
and that those nutrients

1141
00:40:29,928 --> 00:40:31,728
are more easily
digested and absorbed.

1142
00:40:31,730 --> 00:40:32,896
Your confusion
is understandable, though.

1143
00:40:32,898 --> 00:40:33,997
You were bottle-fed.

1144
00:40:33,999 --> 00:40:35,231
He's right. That's right.

1145
00:40:35,233 --> 00:40:36,599
Whoa, guys,

1146
00:40:36,601 --> 00:40:38,301
where's all this hostility
coming from?

1147
00:40:38,303 --> 00:40:40,370
Where do you think
it's coming from, you big tree?

1148
00:40:40,372 --> 00:40:41,771
Two fifths of our team are

1149
00:40:41,773 --> 00:40:44,073
made up of two old guys
who don't know shit.

1150
00:40:44,075 --> 00:40:45,008
Wow.

1151
00:40:45,010 --> 00:40:47,243
Okay, guys, I, for one,

1152
00:40:47,245 --> 00:40:49,012
am very happy to have

1153
00:40:49,014 --> 00:40:52,148
two strapping, mature
gentlemen on the team.

1154
00:40:52,150 --> 00:40:53,149
Thank you.

1155
00:40:53,151 --> 00:40:54,217
Oh, uh,

1156
00:40:54,219 --> 00:40:55,952
I'm Neha Patel, and oh, my God,

1157
00:40:55,954 --> 00:40:57,787
you guys would make
the best Luke and Han.

1158
00:40:57,789 --> 00:40:58,822
Excuse me?

1159
00:40:58,824 --> 00:40:59,956
Oh, <i>Star Wars</i> cosplay.

1160
00:40:59,958 --> 00:41:01,724
Cosplay?
- Costume play.

1161
00:41:01,726 --> 00:41:02,992
You know, where people dress up

1162
00:41:02,994 --> 00:41:04,694
as their favorite anime
or movie character?

1163
00:41:04,696 --> 00:41:06,095
I'd be slave girl Leia.

1164
00:41:06,097 --> 00:41:09,532
Yeah, metal bikini top,
metal G-string panty,

1165
00:41:09,534 --> 00:41:10,767
high-heel leather boots.

1166
00:41:10,769 --> 00:41:12,802
Of course,
I'm chained at the neck.

1167
00:41:12,804 --> 00:41:13,870
Not too constricted,

1168
00:41:13,872 --> 00:41:17,006
but just enough
to make things interesting.

1169
00:41:17,008 --> 00:41:18,241
The neck constriction's
interesting?

1170
00:41:18,243 --> 00:41:19,342
Yeah, a few of us

1171
00:41:19,344 --> 00:41:20,643
get together and...

1172
00:41:20,645 --> 00:41:22,011
whatever happens, happens.

1173
00:41:22,013 --> 00:41:22,946
Oh, uh,

1174
00:41:22,948 --> 00:41:24,414
but work-wise, yeah, um,

1175
00:41:24,416 --> 00:41:26,316
your skills
aren't really relevant here

1176
00:41:26,318 --> 00:41:28,985
or really in this millennium,
so stay out of our way.

1177
00:41:28,987 --> 00:41:30,887
We're gonna do this shit
on our own.

1178
00:41:30,889 --> 00:41:32,455
Well, I'm loving this friction.

1179
00:41:32,457 --> 00:41:35,058
You know why? Because that's
how you get a fire started.

1180
00:41:35,060 --> 00:41:36,759
I'm Nick;
this is my pal, Billy,

1181
00:41:36,761 --> 00:41:37,994
and despite what you may think,

1182
00:41:37,996 --> 00:41:39,696
uh, we're here
like the rest of you,

1183
00:41:39,698 --> 00:41:41,064
just running down a dream.

1184
00:41:41,066 --> 00:41:43,199
All right.

1185
00:41:43,201 --> 00:41:44,901
Team Lyle!

1186
00:41:44,903 --> 00:41:46,302
No, okay, we'll workshop that.

1187
00:41:46,304 --> 00:41:47,403
It's in beta.

1188
00:41:47,405 --> 00:41:48,771
Okeydoke.

1189
00:41:48,773 --> 00:41:51,107
Our Translate lecture
is in 15 minutes.

1190
00:41:53,177 --> 00:41:54,844
Translate is about giving
everyone access

1191
00:41:54,846 --> 00:41:56,212
to every word ever written,

1192
00:41:56,214 --> 00:41:59,148
no matter what language
it was written in,

1193
00:41:59,150 --> 00:42:02,218
because when the entire
world can see, read

1194
00:42:02,220 --> 00:42:05,655
and find the rest of
the world's cool stuff,

1195
00:42:05,657 --> 00:42:06,890
- good things start happening.
- Lyle,

1196
00:42:06,892 --> 00:42:08,691
you laying-in-the-weeds
son of a bitch.

1197
00:42:08,693 --> 00:42:10,573
You're hot for teacher, my man.

1198
00:42:11,862 --> 00:42:14,230
I took her dance class
here once,

1199
00:42:14,232 --> 00:42:16,766
but she doesn't even know
I exist.

1200
00:42:16,768 --> 00:42:17,800
What are you talking about?

1201
00:42:17,802 --> 00:42:19,369
"Doesn't know you exist"?

1202
00:42:19,371 --> 00:42:21,571
Come on, you're communicating
with her right here.

1203
00:42:21,573 --> 00:42:22,805
What's this thing?

1204
00:42:22,807 --> 00:42:24,974
Oh, no, this is just
the company intranet.

1205
00:42:24,976 --> 00:42:27,911
It's got info
on every Google employee

1206
00:42:27,913 --> 00:42:31,347
like birthdays, trivia,
meeting calendars, everything.

1207
00:42:31,349 --> 00:42:33,316
Really?

1208
00:42:33,318 --> 00:42:34,884
Hmm.

1209
00:42:46,730 --> 00:42:49,198
Oh, hey, fancy seeing you here.

1210
00:42:49,200 --> 00:42:50,433
Is it?

1211
00:42:50,435 --> 00:42:52,702
Or maybe you calendar-stalked me
and you knew exactly

1212
00:42:52,704 --> 00:42:54,103
where I was gonna be right now.

1213
00:42:54,105 --> 00:42:56,239
Now, am I detecting
a bit of an accent?

1214
00:42:56,241 --> 00:42:57,140
You are.

1215
00:42:57,142 --> 00:42:59,142
Uh-huh,
I have a very good ear.

1216
00:42:59,144 --> 00:43:01,177
English, right? 'Ello, guvna.

1217
00:43:01,179 --> 00:43:03,646
<i>Oliver Twist,</i>
<i>"more bread, please, sir."</i>

1218
00:43:03,648 --> 00:43:05,214
Australian, actually.

1219
00:43:05,216 --> 00:43:07,417
Really?
Similar flags, though.

1220
00:43:07,419 --> 00:43:08,885
Hey, Dana.
- Kiwi.

1221
00:43:08,887 --> 00:43:10,219
<i>Lord of the Rings</i> country.

1222
00:43:10,221 --> 00:43:11,688
Okay, the stain
on this one's better,

1223
00:43:11,690 --> 00:43:13,222
but the white one
may be a goner.

1224
00:43:13,224 --> 00:43:14,390
Okay, thanks.

1225
00:43:14,392 --> 00:43:15,625
I eat very fast.

1226
00:43:15,627 --> 00:43:16,659
Bangers and mash.

1227
00:43:16,661 --> 00:43:17,660
That's also British.

1228
00:43:17,662 --> 00:43:19,028
Vegemite sandwich, then,

1229
00:43:19,030 --> 00:43:20,763
which I'm sure you
gobble down very quickly

1230
00:43:20,765 --> 00:43:22,432
so you can get
back to the grind.

1231
00:43:22,434 --> 00:43:24,901
I mean, it is impressive
staying at work till midnight

1232
00:43:24,903 --> 00:43:27,236
every day...
also on the calendar.

1233
00:43:27,238 --> 00:43:28,304
Look, Nick,

1234
00:43:28,306 --> 00:43:31,307
I'm sure you're very popular

1235
00:43:31,309 --> 00:43:33,343
with the 19-year-olds
at the University of Phoenix,

1236
00:43:33,345 --> 00:43:36,980
with your Southern drawl,
and the blond hair,

1237
00:43:36,982 --> 00:43:38,948
and this whole thing
you got going on,

1238
00:43:38,950 --> 00:43:41,551
but I got to tell you,
this is just never gonna happen.

1239
00:43:41,553 --> 00:43:43,920
"This"? What?

1240
00:43:43,922 --> 00:43:44,921
I mean, it's...

1241
00:43:44,923 --> 00:43:46,155
Oh, no, no, no, no, no.

1242
00:43:46,157 --> 00:43:47,824
This is me reaching out
as an intern.

1243
00:43:47,826 --> 00:43:48,925
They've encouraged us

1244
00:43:48,927 --> 00:43:50,193
to approach experienced Googlers

1245
00:43:50,195 --> 00:43:51,527
and just pick their brains.

1246
00:43:51,529 --> 00:43:53,663
Oh, oh, I'm sorry.

1247
00:43:53,665 --> 00:43:54,764
Of course.

1248
00:43:54,766 --> 00:43:56,199
You thought I was just...

1249
00:43:56,201 --> 00:43:58,201
"Oh, who's this wanker
just steaming in?"

1250
00:43:58,203 --> 00:44:00,870
You just want to learn.
You want to learn.

1251
00:44:00,872 --> 00:44:02,305
Well, look, Sid here,
he's incredible.

1252
00:44:02,307 --> 00:44:04,841
He's about to give a talk
on HTML5.

1253
00:44:04,843 --> 00:44:05,842
Okay.
- Nick is desperate
to learn.

1254
00:44:05,844 --> 00:44:06,976
He'd love to come along.

1255
00:44:06,978 --> 00:44:07,977
Yeah.
- Let's make it happen.

1256
00:44:07,979 --> 00:44:09,178
Yeah, sure.

1257
00:44:09,180 --> 00:44:10,446
Okay, well...
- Come on down, brother.

1258
00:44:10,448 --> 00:44:12,382
Sometimes we go
all day, all night.

1259
00:44:12,384 --> 00:44:13,750
Well, I can't start any sooner
than right now.

1260
00:44:13,752 --> 00:44:15,451
Let's do it.

1261
00:44:15,453 --> 00:44:17,086
Cool, let's rock.
- Come on, everybody;
here we go.

1262
00:44:17,088 --> 00:44:18,154
Now, wait, where are you going?

1263
00:44:18,156 --> 00:44:19,822
Oh, I have a meeting.

1264
00:44:19,824 --> 00:44:21,524
But you know that.

1265
00:44:21,526 --> 00:44:22,659
Cheerio.

1266
00:44:22,661 --> 00:44:23,860
Cheerio.

1267
00:44:23,862 --> 00:44:25,194
Let's go.

1268
00:44:25,196 --> 00:44:27,664
Come on, don't be shy.

1269
00:44:30,834 --> 00:44:33,670
You have a crush on her,
my friend.

1270
00:44:33,672 --> 00:44:35,204
<i>Good morning, interns.</i>

1271
00:44:35,206 --> 00:44:37,473
<i>Today marks the first</i>
<i>of several challenges</i>

1272
00:44:37,475 --> 00:44:39,942
through which your team
will show their merits.

1273
00:44:39,944 --> 00:44:41,744
While internally dogfooding
a new product,

1274
00:44:41,746 --> 00:44:42,946
a number of Googlers reported

1275
00:44:42,947 --> 00:44:44,814
a bug that disabled their audio.

1276
00:44:44,816 --> 00:44:46,849
All two million lines

1277
00:44:46,851 --> 00:44:49,652
of that code
are in the source files.

1278
00:44:49,654 --> 00:44:51,854
Find the bug.

1279
00:44:51,856 --> 00:44:53,322
Okay, we should check
the user reports.

1280
00:44:53,324 --> 00:44:54,791
Scan the logs
for any red flags.

1281
00:44:54,793 --> 00:44:56,125
See what exceptions
were thrown.

1282
00:44:56,127 --> 00:44:57,560
I always start
by drawing up strategies

1283
00:44:57,562 --> 00:44:58,861
to sift through the code.

1284
00:44:58,863 --> 00:45:00,530
Code, right?
Code, right? Codes.
- Right?

1285
00:45:00,532 --> 00:45:02,198
Uh...
- So at the end of the
day, we're looking

1286
00:45:02,200 --> 00:45:03,866
to kind of break the
password here, right?

1287
00:45:03,868 --> 00:45:05,334
Maybe the answer's
in the question.

1288
00:45:05,336 --> 00:45:06,969
Maybe it's
something with bug.
- Eureka.

1289
00:45:06,971 --> 00:45:07,970
Bug like fly.
<i>The Fly.</i>

1290
00:45:07,972 --> 00:45:08,971
Is Chetty a cinephile?

1291
00:45:08,973 --> 00:45:11,307
Goldblum.
- Goldblum!

1292
00:45:11,309 --> 00:45:12,942
Boggles my mind
that no one has a notebook out.

1293
00:45:12,944 --> 00:45:14,711
You guys are focused
on writing this gibberish.

1294
00:45:14,713 --> 00:45:16,179
Maybe that's helpful,
maybe it's not,

1295
00:45:16,181 --> 00:45:18,147
but I guarantee you
what we're saying is helpful.

1296
00:45:18,149 --> 00:45:21,451
Guys, we're looking for
a bug, not a password.
They're different things.

1297
00:45:21,453 --> 00:45:23,019
Keep going
with that human connection.

1298
00:45:23,021 --> 00:45:24,862
Oh, geez, you know what?
- You had it.

1299
00:45:27,158 --> 00:45:28,891
We'll go on fly,
'cause that's where we're at,

1300
00:45:28,893 --> 00:45:30,526
and we're flying it;
we're right there.
- Fly, fly.

1301
00:45:30,528 --> 00:45:31,728
I know we're
buzzing around it.
- I like that.

1302
00:45:31,730 --> 00:45:33,229
Zzz, Y-L-F.

1303
00:45:33,231 --> 00:45:35,231
And it's a word scramble,
and it's life.

1304
00:45:35,233 --> 00:45:36,999
For some reason, I can't
get "fly" out of my mind,

1305
00:45:37,001 --> 00:45:38,434
and now I'm going Lopez,
Jennifer Lopez.

1306
00:45:38,436 --> 00:45:40,103
Is it a fly girl?
- "Superfly."

1307
00:45:40,105 --> 00:45:42,338
Pop fly? Uh, excavation.

1308
00:45:42,340 --> 00:45:44,507
Earthquakes, California.
- That's it! Write that down!

1309
00:45:44,509 --> 00:45:46,008
Where? Where?
- Do it, do it, write
it down, type it in.

1310
00:45:46,010 --> 00:45:47,577
What am I doing?
- Would you please stop?

1311
00:45:47,579 --> 00:45:50,213
No, we're working.
- No, <i>we're</i> working.

1312
00:45:50,215 --> 00:45:54,350
Yeah, and that's a Sharpie,
by the way, genius.

1313
00:45:54,352 --> 00:45:55,952
That's my fault.

1314
00:45:55,954 --> 00:45:58,187
Go ahead and wash that.

1315
00:45:58,189 --> 00:46:00,723
Look, guys, I'm sorry,
but you're not helping.

1316
00:46:00,725 --> 00:46:02,191
You're just saying
a lot of words really fast

1317
00:46:02,193 --> 00:46:03,493
that mean nothing.

1318
00:46:03,495 --> 00:46:05,695
To find the bug, we need
to scan the user logs

1319
00:46:05,697 --> 00:46:07,764
and review the code until we
find the programmer's mistake.

1320
00:46:07,766 --> 00:46:09,065
It's the only way.

1321
00:46:09,067 --> 00:46:10,700
Except what if it's not
the only way?

1322
00:46:10,702 --> 00:46:12,668
Go.
- Okay, you said
that someone programmed it.

1323
00:46:12,670 --> 00:46:14,103
That means some person

1324
00:46:14,105 --> 00:46:16,739
in this building
wrote that code.
- A human being.

1325
00:46:16,741 --> 00:46:18,941
Let's just give him a name
and call him Tony.

1326
00:46:18,943 --> 00:46:21,244
Tony.
- Let's say Tony likes kayaking.

1327
00:46:21,246 --> 00:46:23,012
Kayak.
- All of a sudden,
me and Nick become friends

1328
00:46:23,014 --> 00:46:24,580
with Tony; we're throwing
a few beers back.

1329
00:46:24,582 --> 00:46:27,416
We're doing a little kayaking
with my main man, Tony.

1330
00:46:27,418 --> 00:46:29,552
Tony's bombed on
the open water.

1331
00:46:29,554 --> 00:46:30,520
Next thing you know,

1332
00:46:30,522 --> 00:46:32,522
we start gabbing
about audio bugs.

1333
00:46:32,524 --> 00:46:34,524
Yeah, I actually think
it's a great idea.

1334
00:46:34,526 --> 00:46:35,858
Good, great!
- Finally!

1335
00:46:35,860 --> 00:46:37,226
Dark and stormy, feeling us.

1336
00:46:37,228 --> 00:46:38,895
Yeah, no,
feeling you big-time, buddy.

1337
00:46:38,897 --> 00:46:40,663
Terrific.
- You know what, in fact,
why don't the two

1338
00:46:40,665 --> 00:46:42,866
of you guys right now
go and find the programmer.

1339
00:46:42,867 --> 00:46:44,267
Great. Great idea.

1340
00:46:44,269 --> 00:46:45,468
Yo-Yo, who's our man?

1341
00:46:46,303 --> 00:46:48,538
His name is Charles Xavier.

1342
00:46:48,540 --> 00:46:50,606
Charles Xavier.
- Perfect. Nick, write this
down.

1343
00:46:50,608 --> 00:46:52,875
Steel trap.
- Uh, he's a professor.

1344
00:46:52,877 --> 00:46:54,277
At Stanford.

1345
00:46:54,279 --> 00:46:56,445
Yeah, just a few
minutes away, really.

1346
00:46:56,447 --> 00:46:58,147
Guys...
- And he's in a wheelchair.

1347
00:46:58,149 --> 00:46:59,382
Got it, Stanford, wheelchair.

1348
00:46:59,384 --> 00:47:00,983
What else?
- Uh, oh, he's bald.

1349
00:47:00,985 --> 00:47:03,186
Might be with his best friend
who wears a metal helmet.

1350
00:47:03,188 --> 00:47:05,054
Wears a fitted suit.
- He looks like a geneticist.

1351
00:47:05,056 --> 00:47:06,823
More, more, more, more.
Go on, hit us, hit us.

1352
00:47:06,825 --> 00:47:09,158
Has a British accent.
- British? With my ear,
we're done.

1353
00:47:09,160 --> 00:47:10,860
Okay, keep searching;
think fly, think bug.

1354
00:47:10,862 --> 00:47:12,295
I promise you, somehow,

1355
00:47:12,297 --> 00:47:13,696
this intersects with Goldblum.
- Billy!

1356
00:47:13,698 --> 00:47:15,097
Let's get a move on.
- Goldblum, of course.

1357
00:47:15,099 --> 00:47:16,599
All right, back to work, guys.

1358
00:47:19,203 --> 00:47:22,205
Hey, Professor, what up!

1359
00:47:26,043 --> 00:47:27,777
Professor Charles Xavier?

1360
00:47:27,779 --> 00:47:29,045
Very funny.

1361
00:47:29,047 --> 00:47:30,746
British.
Listen, Professor Xavier,

1362
00:47:30,748 --> 00:47:33,115
sorry to bother you. If we could
just talk to you for...

1363
00:47:33,117 --> 00:47:34,250
Gentlemen,
I don't have time for his.

1364
00:47:34,252 --> 00:47:35,284
Okay, Professor Xavier,

1365
00:47:35,286 --> 00:47:36,586
we know that it's you,

1366
00:47:36,588 --> 00:47:38,287
and listen,
we really need your help.

1367
00:47:38,289 --> 00:47:39,956
All right, you-you found me out.

1368
00:47:39,958 --> 00:47:41,390
I am Charles Xavier,

1369
00:47:41,392 --> 00:47:44,060
and that's Cyclops,

1370
00:47:44,062 --> 00:47:45,795
and Rogue.

1371
00:47:45,797 --> 00:47:46,863
We're all here.

1372
00:47:46,865 --> 00:47:48,197
Now, come closer.

1373
00:47:48,199 --> 00:47:49,365
I want to share some

1374
00:47:49,367 --> 00:47:51,467
of my telekinetic wisdom
with you.

1375
00:47:51,469 --> 00:47:53,069
Well, I want you to share
with me,

1376
00:47:53,071 --> 00:47:55,071
'cause I want to know
about these bugs.

1377
00:47:57,075 --> 00:47:58,808
Assholes!

1378
00:47:58,810 --> 00:48:01,143
Oh, you maniacal monster!

1379
00:48:01,145 --> 00:48:03,846
Professor Xavier
is a total dick!

1380
00:48:03,848 --> 00:48:05,748
<i>Yo to the yo.</i>

1381
00:48:05,750 --> 00:48:07,583
Where are we at on ensuring
it wasn't a networking issue?

1382
00:48:07,585 --> 00:48:09,218
Confirmed there
was no packet lost.

1383
00:48:09,220 --> 00:48:10,453
Almost done checking
on whether the encryption

1384
00:48:10,455 --> 00:48:11,654
had the wrong certificate.

1385
00:48:11,656 --> 00:48:13,089
I'm sorry, "almost"?

1386
00:48:13,091 --> 00:48:14,223
Uh, you're either done
or you're not.

1387
00:48:14,225 --> 00:48:15,291
You can't be almost pregnant.

1388
00:48:15,293 --> 00:48:16,893
Yeah, hey,
she would know, guys.

1389
00:48:16,895 --> 00:48:18,761
You know what, why don't you
Google "asshole," asshole?

1390
00:48:18,763 --> 00:48:20,663
She's right.
It's not good enough.

1391
00:48:20,665 --> 00:48:22,098
Get it together, Yo-Yo.

1392
00:48:22,100 --> 00:48:23,966
What the fuck was that?

1393
00:48:23,968 --> 00:48:26,469
I was punishing myself
for my inferior performance.

1394
00:48:26,471 --> 00:48:28,004
Well, that's good.

1395
00:48:28,006 --> 00:48:29,372
That's great.
We got crazy over here

1396
00:48:29,374 --> 00:48:31,474
and crazy horny over here.
- Oh, let me guess.

1397
00:48:31,476 --> 00:48:33,509
Big dick 'cause...
little dick?
- Did your mind

1398
00:48:33,511 --> 00:48:35,111
just immediately go
to a penis joke?

1399
00:48:35,113 --> 00:48:36,279
Is that, like, all you...
- Oh, oh, I'm sorry.

1400
00:48:36,281 --> 00:48:37,380
Was that not witty enough
for you?

1401
00:48:37,382 --> 00:48:38,714
Because I'm too busy working.

1402
00:48:38,716 --> 00:48:40,483
No, yeah, that's fine.
I just want you

1403
00:48:40,485 --> 00:48:41,884
to acknowledge the fact that
I'm winning the quip-off.

1404
00:48:41,886 --> 00:48:43,586
That's what you're worried
about right now?

1405
00:48:43,588 --> 00:48:45,121
Yes, that's really
what I'm worried about.

1406
00:48:45,123 --> 00:48:46,255
So you're more concerned
with snarky banter

1407
00:48:46,257 --> 00:48:47,897
than actually winning?
- Yeah.

1408
00:48:50,460 --> 00:48:53,496
The deadline's at
the end of the week, so...

1409
00:48:53,498 --> 00:48:55,164
Hey, hey.

1410
00:48:55,166 --> 00:48:56,999
You guys find Professor Xavier?

1411
00:48:57,001 --> 00:48:58,134
Yeah, we found him.

1412
00:48:58,136 --> 00:48:59,336
Yeah, thanks so much for that.

1413
00:48:59,337 --> 00:49:00,503
That's, uh...

1414
00:49:00,505 --> 00:49:02,138
really great team spirit.

1415
00:49:02,140 --> 00:49:03,639
Mind sliding over here?

1416
00:49:04,675 --> 00:49:06,409
I'm sorry.

1417
00:49:06,411 --> 00:49:08,811
It really doesn't look like
there's enough room for you.

1418
00:49:11,148 --> 00:49:12,615
Have a great lunch.

1419
00:49:12,617 --> 00:49:13,716
Yeah, enjoy it.

1420
00:49:15,218 --> 00:49:16,852
Okay, let's see here.

1421
00:49:18,755 --> 00:49:20,790
Let's see.

1422
00:49:20,792 --> 00:49:22,825
See anything?
- Oh, there's an opening.

1423
00:49:22,827 --> 00:49:25,761
- Is that taken? Okay.
- It's taken.

1424
00:49:28,832 --> 00:49:31,500
Let's go over here.

1425
00:49:33,337 --> 00:49:35,304
Hi, Headphones.
You mind if we sit here?

1426
00:49:35,306 --> 00:49:37,840
I think we can take that

1427
00:49:37,842 --> 00:49:39,308
as a "yes."
- All right.

1428
00:49:39,310 --> 00:49:41,777
We're gonna have to
at this point.

1429
00:49:41,779 --> 00:49:43,646
How you doing, bud?

1430
00:49:43,648 --> 00:49:45,548
He doesn't even know we exist.

1431
00:49:45,550 --> 00:49:47,717
He's like some kind
of a superhero on this computer.

1432
00:49:47,719 --> 00:49:49,752
Look at him;
he's just crushing his thing

1433
00:49:49,754 --> 00:49:51,087
and kicking ass.

1434
00:49:51,089 --> 00:49:52,455
Do you remember
what it felt like

1435
00:49:52,457 --> 00:49:54,657
to be that good at something?

1436
00:49:54,659 --> 00:49:56,859
Look at this!

1437
00:49:56,861 --> 00:49:57,994
William.

1438
00:49:57,996 --> 00:49:59,328
Nicholas.

1439
00:49:59,330 --> 00:50:01,731
Person I don't know.

1440
00:50:01,733 --> 00:50:03,599
Figured I'd find you
at the cool kids' table.

1441
00:50:03,601 --> 00:50:06,936
It's like a confederacy
of outcasts out here.

1442
00:50:06,938 --> 00:50:08,738
Heard you had
a day trip to, uh,

1443
00:50:08,740 --> 00:50:10,139
Palo Alto?

1444
00:50:10,141 --> 00:50:13,776
Home of Silicon Valley and
also the X-Men, apparently.

1445
00:50:13,778 --> 00:50:15,478
Where are you going
with this, Graham?

1446
00:50:15,480 --> 00:50:17,947
Oh, I just wanted
to let you guys know,

1447
00:50:17,949 --> 00:50:19,348
we won the bug challenge.

1448
00:50:19,350 --> 00:50:21,083
What are you gonna do
about it, boys?

1449
00:50:21,085 --> 00:50:22,985
I wouldn't worry if I was you
about what we're gonna do

1450
00:50:22,987 --> 00:50:24,820
or what we're not gonna do;
we're gonna be just fine.

1451
00:50:24,822 --> 00:50:26,489
You're gonna be fine?
All right.

1452
00:50:26,491 --> 00:50:27,790
Keep telling yourself that.

1453
00:50:27,792 --> 00:50:29,992
See you all-stars
at the intramural fields

1454
00:50:29,994 --> 00:50:31,327
for the next challenge
I'll win.

1455
00:50:31,329 --> 00:50:33,596
Sports. Something
we know about, baby.

1456
00:50:33,598 --> 00:50:35,164
Something we know
a lot about, baby.

1457
00:50:35,166 --> 00:50:36,932
Come on, now.
- Look at me.

1458
00:50:36,934 --> 00:50:38,167
For real.

1459
00:51:00,057 --> 00:51:03,125
All right, teams,
welcome to the Quidditch pitch.

1460
00:51:03,127 --> 00:51:05,795
Let's have a good,
clean match, Nooglers.

1461
00:51:12,402 --> 00:51:14,036
Fatty, don't touch the ball.

1462
00:51:14,038 --> 00:51:16,038
Okay, rules. The Beaters toss
the Bludgers at the Chasers

1463
00:51:16,040 --> 00:51:18,007
before they can get the Quaffle
through the three rings.

1464
00:51:18,009 --> 00:51:19,809
No blagging, no blatching,
no bumphing, no haversacking.

1465
00:51:19,811 --> 00:51:21,677
I don't want to see
any Quaffle-pocking.

1466
00:51:21,679 --> 00:51:23,913
No Imperius curses,
no Confundus charms.

1467
00:51:23,915 --> 00:51:26,015
In the unlikely event
of a Dementor attack,

1468
00:51:26,017 --> 00:51:27,616
use a Patronus charm.

1469
00:51:27,618 --> 00:51:29,852
I recommend the stag,
but that's a personal decision.

1470
00:51:29,854 --> 00:51:31,554
Lyle, Lyle, Lyle,
these beautiful idiots

1471
00:51:31,556 --> 00:51:32,588
have no idea
what you're talking about.

1472
00:51:32,590 --> 00:51:33,923
Use your Muggle words.
Come on.

1473
00:51:33,925 --> 00:51:35,391
Come on, Lyle,
you're making me feel

1474
00:51:35,393 --> 00:51:37,026
like I'm back in
math class, okay?

1475
00:51:37,028 --> 00:51:40,096
You got a couple savants here
with eye-hand coordination.

1476
00:51:40,098 --> 00:51:42,431
Just say "game on"
and let us play.

1477
00:51:42,433 --> 00:51:44,033
Fair enough; version 2.0.

1478
00:51:44,035 --> 00:51:45,134
Peg them with the kick balls

1479
00:51:45,136 --> 00:51:46,435
before they throw the volleyball

1480
00:51:46,437 --> 00:51:47,570
through the hoop.

1481
00:51:47,572 --> 00:51:48,904
Brooms in, people.

1482
00:51:48,906 --> 00:51:50,072
Hufflepuff on three.

1483
00:51:50,074 --> 00:51:52,041
One, two, three...

1484
00:51:52,043 --> 00:51:53,042
Hufflepuff!

1485
00:51:53,044 --> 00:51:54,110
Yeah, son!

1486
00:51:54,112 --> 00:51:55,311
Yeah, let's get it.

1487
00:51:55,313 --> 00:51:57,079
All right, game time.

1488
00:51:57,081 --> 00:51:59,014
Let's get Huff-tarded in here.

1489
00:52:04,287 --> 00:52:07,923
No mercy! No mercy!

1490
00:52:07,925 --> 00:52:10,192
Tips down!

1491
00:52:10,194 --> 00:52:11,694
Blue team, ready?

1492
00:52:11,696 --> 00:52:13,329
Ready!

1493
00:52:13,331 --> 00:52:15,231
Red team, ready?

1494
00:52:15,233 --> 00:52:16,332
Bangarang!

1495
00:52:16,334 --> 00:52:18,134
Brooms up!

1496
00:52:30,847 --> 00:52:31,747
Ball!

1497
00:52:31,749 --> 00:52:34,750
All right, slam it!

1498
00:52:34,752 --> 00:52:36,118
Nice.
- Yeah!

1499
00:52:36,120 --> 00:52:37,386
Yeah!

1500
00:52:37,388 --> 00:52:39,755
Ten points blue.

1501
00:52:39,757 --> 00:52:40,890
Billy, Billy, talk to me!

1502
00:52:40,892 --> 00:52:42,258
What do I do?
- What are we doing?

1503
00:52:42,260 --> 00:52:43,592
How do I do it?
- It's chaos!

1504
00:52:43,594 --> 00:52:45,895
Come on, you got it.

1505
00:52:47,397 --> 00:52:48,664
Billy, I'm lost.

1506
00:52:48,666 --> 00:52:50,399
Just hit them, hit them!

1507
00:52:50,401 --> 00:52:52,902
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa,
what's happening?

1508
00:52:52,904 --> 00:52:54,937
Lyle!

1509
00:52:54,939 --> 00:52:56,772
What the hell was that?

1510
00:52:56,774 --> 00:52:58,774
Why don't you try looking up
and giving a shit, man?

1511
00:52:58,776 --> 00:53:00,843
- Come on!

1512
00:53:00,845 --> 00:53:02,344
I can't take this! What am I
supposed... Come get me.

1513
00:53:02,346 --> 00:53:03,412
Who do I hit?

1514
00:53:03,414 --> 00:53:04,680
No, no!
- Come get hit.

1515
00:53:04,682 --> 00:53:05,748
Who wants to fight?

1516
00:53:05,750 --> 00:53:06,982
I want somebody to hit!

1517
00:53:06,984 --> 00:53:08,317
Get the broom
between the legs, folks.

1518
00:53:08,319 --> 00:53:09,652
My bad. Let's go, let's go.

1519
00:53:09,654 --> 00:53:11,153
Lesson learned, lesson learned,
lesson learned.

1520
00:53:11,155 --> 00:53:13,556
What the fuck does this have
to do with computers?

1521
00:53:13,558 --> 00:53:15,024
I'm winning.
- Stop.

1522
00:53:15,026 --> 00:53:16,392
Don't move, fatty.

1523
00:53:24,068 --> 00:53:25,267
Blue, ten points.

1524
00:53:25,269 --> 00:53:26,702
Ball!

1525
00:53:27,370 --> 00:53:28,871
Thank you.

1526
00:53:29,907 --> 00:53:32,107
What?! What?!

1527
00:53:32,109 --> 00:53:33,108
Time-out.

1528
00:53:33,110 --> 00:53:34,410
Time!

1529
00:53:37,080 --> 00:53:38,981
Bring it in, guys.
Come on, let's huddle up.

1530
00:53:38,983 --> 00:53:40,115
Good work, everybody.

1531
00:53:40,117 --> 00:53:41,417
Everybody except for you, Zach.

1532
00:53:41,419 --> 00:53:43,385
It's over.
- Yeah, our team's a joke.

1533
00:53:43,387 --> 00:53:44,587
Well, I ain't laughing.

1534
00:53:44,589 --> 00:53:45,788
What about you, Billy?

1535
00:53:45,790 --> 00:53:46,889
Hell, no.

1536
00:53:46,891 --> 00:53:48,991
Listen, we need to
get our minds right

1537
00:53:48,993 --> 00:53:50,359
and start believing.

1538
00:53:50,361 --> 00:53:51,427
This reminds me
of a little girl

1539
00:53:51,429 --> 00:53:52,461
who had to get her head right

1540
00:53:52,463 --> 00:53:53,495
and start believing,

1541
00:53:53,497 --> 00:53:54,763
a little girl from a steel town

1542
00:53:54,765 --> 00:53:56,098
who had the dream to dance.

1543
00:53:56,100 --> 00:53:57,866
No one believed
in that little welder girl,

1544
00:53:57,868 --> 00:53:59,501
but thank God she believed
in herself.

1545
00:53:59,503 --> 00:54:00,502
Are you talking
about <i>Flashdance?</i>

1546
00:54:00,504 --> 00:54:01,570
The movie from the '80s?

1547
00:54:01,572 --> 00:54:02,871
Yeah, you're damn right I am.

1548
00:54:02,873 --> 00:54:03,872
That's exactly what
I'm talking about.

1549
00:54:03,874 --> 00:54:05,574
Got it.
- The deck was stacked

1550
00:54:05,576 --> 00:54:07,710
against Alex, and you know
how she overcame those odds?

1551
00:54:07,712 --> 00:54:09,278
By believing in
herself and trying.

1552
00:54:09,280 --> 00:54:12,014
She literally had
to become a maniac.

1553
00:54:12,016 --> 00:54:14,049
Have any of you ever
been called a maniac?

1554
00:54:14,051 --> 00:54:15,084
Maybe because you were

1555
00:54:15,086 --> 00:54:16,085
a little bit different?

1556
00:54:16,087 --> 00:54:17,453
My mom calls me a maniac

1557
00:54:17,455 --> 00:54:18,654
every night when I tell her
I love her.

1558
00:54:18,656 --> 00:54:19,922
Of course she does, Yo-Yo.

1559
00:54:19,924 --> 00:54:22,258
You are a little bit,
in a good way.

1560
00:54:22,260 --> 00:54:23,292
Well, guess what.

1561
00:54:23,294 --> 00:54:24,727
That old Bill Gates,

1562
00:54:24,729 --> 00:54:26,729
they called him
a maniac, too.
- No question.

1563
00:54:26,731 --> 00:54:29,131
Yeah, I don't think anyone
ever called him a maniac.

1564
00:54:29,133 --> 00:54:30,966
I just called
him a maniac.
- Okay, damn it, guys.

1565
00:54:30,968 --> 00:54:32,468
You guys are getting
off the point here.
- You're right.

1566
00:54:32,470 --> 00:54:33,769
She had to strip
down to nothing.

1567
00:54:33,771 --> 00:54:35,638
She had to sit in that chair
and arch her back,

1568
00:54:35,640 --> 00:54:36,772
and she pulled
a chain to nowhere,

1569
00:54:36,774 --> 00:54:37,940
and doused herself with water.

1570
00:54:37,942 --> 00:54:39,475
Yeah, where did that
water come from?

1571
00:54:39,477 --> 00:54:41,176
Who knows?
- It came from her belief

1572
00:54:41,178 --> 00:54:42,611
that it was there.

1573
00:54:42,613 --> 00:54:44,713
She believed so hard she
found herself with an audition

1574
00:54:44,715 --> 00:54:46,615
in front of those stuffed shirts
at the dance school,

1575
00:54:46,617 --> 00:54:50,085
and she spun...
oh, and she spun and she spun

1576
00:54:50,087 --> 00:54:51,787
and she spun and she spun

1577
00:54:51,789 --> 00:54:53,856
and she spun herself into
that dance school.

1578
00:54:53,858 --> 00:54:56,125
And she spun herself
into our hearts.

1579
00:54:56,127 --> 00:54:57,526
Now,

1580
00:54:57,528 --> 00:54:58,861
in the second half

1581
00:54:58,863 --> 00:55:00,896
of whatever the hell
you guys call this game,

1582
00:55:00,898 --> 00:55:03,332
can't we all be
that little welder girl

1583
00:55:03,334 --> 00:55:04,900
who wants to be something more?

1584
00:55:04,902 --> 00:55:06,435
Now, look, I know you
guys aren't excited

1585
00:55:06,437 --> 00:55:08,737
that we're on your team,
but we're here.

1586
00:55:08,739 --> 00:55:10,939
Guys, we're in
this thing together.

1587
00:55:10,941 --> 00:55:13,075
So I'm asking you,
believe in yourselves,

1588
00:55:13,077 --> 00:55:14,209
believe in each other.

1589
00:55:15,312 --> 00:55:17,279
Let's put on our leg warmers,

1590
00:55:17,281 --> 00:55:19,348
and let's dance our asses off.

1591
00:55:19,350 --> 00:55:21,750
Come here, you little
lovable maniacs. Get in here.

1592
00:55:21,752 --> 00:55:24,019
All right, now, I got an idea
that I think would make

1593
00:55:24,021 --> 00:55:25,521
- Bear Bryant smile.
- No idea

1594
00:55:25,523 --> 00:55:27,443
who that is,
but we're listening.

1595
00:55:30,895 --> 00:55:33,095
Let's go!

1596
00:55:35,231 --> 00:55:36,565
Stuart!

1597
00:55:36,567 --> 00:55:38,167
Neha!

1598
00:55:39,636 --> 00:55:40,836
Lyle, hit me!

1599
00:55:40,838 --> 00:55:43,138
Got it, got it, got it, got it!

1600
00:55:43,140 --> 00:55:44,173
Yeah!

1601
00:55:45,209 --> 00:55:47,443
Baby!

1602
00:55:53,117 --> 00:55:56,118
Blind her! I'm going in!

1603
00:55:57,354 --> 00:55:58,487
Yeah!

1604
00:55:58,489 --> 00:56:00,723
- Yes!

1605
00:56:07,965 --> 00:56:09,198
Yo-Yo!

1606
00:56:10,700 --> 00:56:13,569
- Yeah!
- Eat it, Malfoy! Suck it!

1607
00:56:17,608 --> 00:56:19,541
See ya!

1608
00:56:19,543 --> 00:56:21,110
Coming at you, Nick!

1609
00:56:22,580 --> 00:56:23,779
Yeah!

1610
00:56:23,781 --> 00:56:25,447
Who's on Blondie?

1611
00:56:25,449 --> 00:56:28,617
All right, let's go, boys.

1612
00:56:29,620 --> 00:56:32,421
Okay.

1613
00:56:32,423 --> 00:56:33,822
Pick and roll.

1614
00:56:33,824 --> 00:56:34,857
Stockton to Malone!

1615
00:56:34,859 --> 00:56:36,892
She shoots, she scores, baby!

1616
00:56:36,894 --> 00:56:38,927
Baby, what's up?!
- Yeah!

1617
00:56:40,163 --> 00:56:41,263
Tie game!

1618
00:56:41,265 --> 00:56:42,464
Where were you? Huh?

1619
00:56:42,466 --> 00:56:44,466
I had to use the
restroom. I'm sorry.

1620
00:56:48,806 --> 00:56:50,439
It's the Golden Snitch!

1621
00:56:50,441 --> 00:56:52,574
Who the fuck is this now?

1622
00:56:52,576 --> 00:56:54,143
Zach, get over here.

1623
00:56:54,145 --> 00:56:56,879
All right, Fatface, I think
it's time to fake an injury.

1624
00:56:56,881 --> 00:56:58,841
I don't know how
to fake an injury.

1625
00:57:00,284 --> 00:57:02,317
Man down.

1626
00:57:03,687 --> 00:57:05,220
Get the tennis ball and we win!

1627
00:57:13,763 --> 00:57:15,497
Run, you big tree!

1628
00:57:15,499 --> 00:57:17,232
- Aah!
- Go!

1629
00:57:17,234 --> 00:57:20,469
Come on, ref,
you gonna call that?!

1630
00:57:33,451 --> 00:57:34,883
Yeah! Yeah!

1631
00:57:44,628 --> 00:57:46,562
You can't be serious.
That bitch just snaked me.

1632
00:57:46,564 --> 00:57:47,963
That's got to be illegal.

1633
00:57:47,965 --> 00:57:50,065
Sorry, if I didn't see it,
I can't call it.

1634
00:57:50,067 --> 00:57:52,334
You okay there, Golden Boy?

1635
00:57:52,336 --> 00:57:53,402
Yeah, the Snitch is fine.

1636
00:57:53,404 --> 00:57:54,870
G.D. it!

1637
00:57:54,872 --> 00:57:56,338
Don't start that, Yo-Yo.

1638
00:57:56,340 --> 00:57:57,573
You did your best

1639
00:57:57,575 --> 00:57:59,808
out there today.
That's the first time

1640
00:57:59,810 --> 00:58:01,743
we all came together as a team.

1641
00:58:01,745 --> 00:58:03,679
Goddamn it, Billy's right.

1642
00:58:03,681 --> 00:58:05,414
Let's keep it rolling.

1643
00:58:05,416 --> 00:58:06,982
Just keep it rolling.

1644
00:58:06,984 --> 00:58:08,951
Come on, let's get a frosty.

1645
00:58:08,953 --> 00:58:11,887
Nick?
- Yeah?

1646
00:58:11,889 --> 00:58:14,223
Would I be wrong
to call you my brother?

1647
00:58:14,225 --> 00:58:15,958
Of course not.
I'd do anything

1648
00:58:15,960 --> 00:58:17,392
for my little show pony.

1649
00:58:17,394 --> 00:58:18,961
Look at me. Anything.

1650
00:58:18,963 --> 00:58:21,196
I'm gonna need you
to ice my balls for me.

1651
00:58:24,334 --> 00:58:26,869
Brother!

1652
00:58:31,908 --> 00:58:34,510
Oh, boy.

1653
00:58:34,512 --> 00:58:37,446
Time to shut the engines down
for a little bit and...

1654
00:58:37,448 --> 00:58:39,448
take a load off, Nicky.

1655
00:58:39,450 --> 00:58:41,149
Oh, boy. What would I do

1656
00:58:41,151 --> 00:58:44,686
without these babies?
- This is a "shh" zone.

1657
00:58:44,688 --> 00:58:46,522
Hi. Hey.

1658
00:58:46,524 --> 00:58:48,023
Sorry.

1659
00:58:48,025 --> 00:58:49,525
Sorry, sorry, sorry.

1660
00:58:49,527 --> 00:58:52,761
By the way, thank you
for sending me to that seminar.

1661
00:58:52,763 --> 00:58:54,663
It was actually
pretty interesting.

1662
00:58:54,665 --> 00:58:55,731
Really?

1663
00:58:55,733 --> 00:58:56,999
Absolutely.

1664
00:58:57,001 --> 00:58:58,600
What have you been up to?

1665
00:58:58,602 --> 00:59:00,269
I'm gonna go.

1666
00:59:00,271 --> 00:59:01,770
No, no, no, wait,
wait, wait, wait, wait.

1667
00:59:01,772 --> 00:59:03,605
You were here first;
I'll leave.

1668
00:59:03,607 --> 00:59:04,907
Sorry.

1669
00:59:04,909 --> 00:59:06,708
Uh, one thing before I go;
quick question.

1670
00:59:06,710 --> 00:59:08,210
If I was to invite someone out

1671
00:59:08,212 --> 00:59:10,579
to a really nice dinner
around here, where would I go?

1672
00:59:10,581 --> 00:59:12,581
Um...

1673
00:59:12,583 --> 00:59:14,216
I wouldn't know, actually.

1674
00:59:14,218 --> 00:59:16,852
I spend most of my time
on campus.

1675
00:59:16,854 --> 00:59:19,154
What?! That's criminal!

1676
00:59:19,156 --> 00:59:21,189
Has it occurred to you that
I work hard for a reason?

1677
00:59:21,191 --> 00:59:22,891
Hmm? This may
sound silly

1678
00:59:22,893 --> 00:59:25,394
to you, but I actually
believe that what we do here

1679
00:59:25,396 --> 00:59:27,296
helps make people's lives
a little bit better.

1680
00:59:27,298 --> 00:59:29,164
No, no, no. I-I'm not
saying that sounds silly.

1681
00:59:29,166 --> 00:59:30,566
I think it's
admirable. I agree.

1682
00:59:30,568 --> 00:59:31,768
I'm just saying that sometimes

1683
00:59:31,769 --> 00:59:33,835
with all the work,
that you can...

1684
00:59:33,837 --> 00:59:36,572
forget about the person
that matters the most.

1685
00:59:36,574 --> 00:59:39,074
Is this a nap pod
or a convo pod?

1686
00:59:39,076 --> 00:59:41,376
Oh, that's right...
it's a nap pod.

1687
00:59:41,378 --> 00:59:43,412
Shh!
- Yikes.

1688
00:59:43,414 --> 00:59:45,080
I know
where you're going with this.

1689
00:59:45,082 --> 00:59:46,214
Where?
- You think I'm some

1690
00:59:46,216 --> 00:59:47,649
30-year-old exec who's devoted

1691
00:59:47,651 --> 00:59:49,184
her entire life to her career.

1692
00:59:49,186 --> 00:59:51,954
Right? And one day
I'm gonna wake up wanting more.

1693
00:59:51,956 --> 00:59:54,056
Stop me if I'm off base here.

1694
00:59:54,058 --> 00:59:55,390
No?
- Well, no...

1695
00:59:55,392 --> 00:59:56,925
What else does your
intuition tell you?

1696
00:59:56,927 --> 00:59:58,393
That, um, I can't go
on Facebook anymore

1697
00:59:58,395 --> 01:00:00,128
because it's nothing but
happy couples gloating

1698
01:00:00,130 --> 01:00:02,064
about their perfect little
babies in those tiny socks

1699
01:00:02,066 --> 01:00:03,565
that look like
goddamn sneakers?

1700
01:00:03,567 --> 01:00:05,968
Oh, yeah, yeah,
the little Chuck Taylors.

1701
01:00:05,970 --> 01:00:07,169
Only I'm ten years
too late, right?

1702
01:00:07,171 --> 01:00:08,470
Because while I've been working

1703
01:00:08,472 --> 01:00:10,339
so hard, I missed out
on all the bad dates

1704
01:00:10,341 --> 01:00:12,941
and the assholes,
and now I'm running out of time.

1705
01:00:12,943 --> 01:00:15,377
No one told me
it was a game of musical chairs.

1706
01:00:15,379 --> 01:00:17,112
And by the time
I figured it out,

1707
01:00:17,114 --> 01:00:19,448
you know, you can forget it,
it's too late.

1708
01:00:19,450 --> 01:00:20,983
Yeah.

1709
01:00:21,851 --> 01:00:24,219
Anyway...

1710
01:00:24,221 --> 01:00:28,123
anyway... is that kind of
what you were gonna say to me?

1711
01:00:28,125 --> 01:00:30,525
Well, no, I was gonna suggest
that you work harder,

1712
01:00:30,527 --> 01:00:31,827
that you roll up your sleeves,

1713
01:00:31,829 --> 01:00:33,495
that you buckle down
and you get to work.

1714
01:00:33,497 --> 01:00:35,964
You can't change the world
when you're laying in a nap pod.

1715
01:00:35,966 --> 01:00:37,933
No, but honestly,

1716
01:00:37,935 --> 01:00:39,701
if any of what
you were just saying

1717
01:00:39,703 --> 01:00:42,004
applies even slightly
to yourself, you might want

1718
01:00:42,006 --> 01:00:43,438
to think about doing
something about it.

1719
01:00:43,440 --> 01:00:44,940
And that's not me

1720
01:00:44,942 --> 01:00:46,675
preaching at you;
that's coming from someone who,

1721
01:00:46,677 --> 01:00:49,378
when they wake up, the first
thing on their calendar

1722
01:00:49,380 --> 01:00:50,879
is regret.

1723
01:00:50,881 --> 01:00:53,148
Now, that's not a good feeling.

1724
01:00:55,886 --> 01:00:57,486
Anyway, I should go.

1725
01:00:57,488 --> 01:00:59,021
Thank you!

1726
01:00:59,023 --> 01:01:01,857
But before I go...
- Ah, geez!

1727
01:01:01,859 --> 01:01:03,992
Just bear with me.
I want to throw down

1728
01:01:03,994 --> 01:01:05,394
a challenge for you

1729
01:01:05,396 --> 01:01:07,562
to go out to dinner
before I leave town.

1730
01:01:07,564 --> 01:01:10,432
I'll let you know
if a window opens up.
- Great.

1731
01:01:10,434 --> 01:01:12,000
And if it does,
don't minimize it.

1732
01:01:12,002 --> 01:01:13,869
Don't click that little red "X"

1733
01:01:13,871 --> 01:01:14,870
in the corner.

1734
01:01:14,872 --> 01:01:16,271
See? I'm getting it.

1735
01:01:16,273 --> 01:01:17,673
I get it.

1736
01:01:17,675 --> 01:01:19,641
Okay.

1737
01:01:19,643 --> 01:01:21,777
Shh. Go back to sleep.

1738
01:01:27,750 --> 01:01:29,351
Hey, Chetty.

1739
01:01:29,353 --> 01:01:32,320
Pretty good effort on the, uh,
Quidditch field yesterday,

1740
01:01:32,322 --> 01:01:33,522
huh?

1741
01:01:33,524 --> 01:01:37,159
It was a game throwing balls,
and you lost.

1742
01:01:37,161 --> 01:01:39,227
Yeah, but we really rallied
the second half, I think.

1743
01:01:39,229 --> 01:01:41,096
Uh, kind of a spiritual
victory for us.

1744
01:01:41,098 --> 01:01:43,565
Well, perhaps you'll land
a spiritual job.

1745
01:01:43,567 --> 01:01:46,301
You know, Mr. McMahon,
the admissions committee

1746
01:01:46,303 --> 01:01:48,704
was split on you;
you made it by one vote.

1747
01:01:48,706 --> 01:01:51,073
That deciding member
thought you showed promise.

1748
01:01:51,075 --> 01:01:52,974
It's clear now

1749
01:01:52,976 --> 01:01:55,077
that... he was wrong.

1750
01:01:55,079 --> 01:01:58,480
Sometimes the long shots
pay off the biggest.

1751
01:01:59,515 --> 01:02:01,016
Enjoy your pudding.

1752
01:02:01,018 --> 01:02:03,719
I will.

1753
01:02:03,721 --> 01:02:05,353
Oh, and, Chetty?

1754
01:02:05,355 --> 01:02:06,788
Not for nothing,

1755
01:02:06,790 --> 01:02:09,057
can't get me not to like you.

1756
01:02:16,599 --> 01:02:18,667
All right, guys,
let's take this new team spirit,

1757
01:02:18,669 --> 01:02:21,269
and let's apply it to this next
app challenge. We got this.

1758
01:02:21,271 --> 01:02:23,338
Yo, it'd help
if we had an idea for an app.

1759
01:02:23,340 --> 01:02:26,541
You bet your sweet ass
it would, Stewie.
No.

1760
01:02:26,543 --> 01:02:28,944
Never Stewie.
- Okay, you don't like "Stewie."

1761
01:02:28,946 --> 01:02:30,712
Perimeter breach
acknowledged, Stuart.

1762
01:02:30,714 --> 01:02:33,215
It'll feel good when
this one warms up to me.

1763
01:02:33,217 --> 01:02:34,683
You know it's gonna
happen, right?

1764
01:02:34,685 --> 01:02:35,884
I'll break you down like
a two-by-four, bronco.

1765
01:02:35,886 --> 01:02:36,885
Watch me do it.

1766
01:02:36,887 --> 01:02:37,953
Okay, come on, guys,

1767
01:02:37,955 --> 01:02:39,254
let's brainstorm this puppy.

1768
01:02:39,256 --> 01:02:40,822
We're gonna put
the coffee in the pot,

1769
01:02:40,824 --> 01:02:42,224
and we're gonna let it
percolate. Let's go!

1770
01:02:42,226 --> 01:02:43,658
I think it'll be
helpful to explore

1771
01:02:43,660 --> 01:02:45,060
what apps have been
most popular in the past.

1772
01:02:45,062 --> 01:02:46,561
Go.
- Go backwards to go forwards.

1773
01:02:46,563 --> 01:02:48,296
Oh, and we can bin it,
you know?
- Fall out.

1774
01:02:48,298 --> 01:02:49,765
Uh, categorize needle-movers
by type of user.

1775
01:02:49,767 --> 01:02:51,133
- You're gonna do what?
- There you go, Neha.

1776
01:02:51,135 --> 01:02:52,634
Hit it both by function
and by user.

1777
01:02:52,636 --> 01:02:54,636
The old two-prong. You're
on the forest moon of Endor,

1778
01:02:54,638 --> 01:02:56,404
taking out the shield generator,
and you're launching

1779
01:02:56,406 --> 01:02:57,606
an offensive
with Admiral Ackbar.

1780
01:02:57,608 --> 01:02:59,341
It's not a trap.

1781
01:02:59,343 --> 01:03:01,443
All right, guys, I don't want to
kill the momentum, or the mojo

1782
01:03:01,445 --> 01:03:03,712
that you have cooking,
but to be fair with you,

1783
01:03:03,714 --> 01:03:06,114
needles and categories,
they don't use apps.

1784
01:03:06,116 --> 01:03:07,149
People use apps.

1785
01:03:07,151 --> 01:03:08,416
So I have an idea...

1786
01:03:08,418 --> 01:03:10,051
nowadays, people are
taking pictures, right?

1787
01:03:10,053 --> 01:03:11,553
They have their phones now;
they're out.

1788
01:03:11,555 --> 01:03:13,388
Something catches their eye,
they want to take it.

1789
01:03:13,390 --> 01:03:15,590
But then the photo's just
sitting there... what if they

1790
01:03:15,592 --> 01:03:17,392
take that photo
and instantaneously

1791
01:03:17,394 --> 01:03:18,894
put it out there on the line

1792
01:03:18,896 --> 01:03:20,228
and they share it
with their friends?

1793
01:03:20,230 --> 01:03:22,097
That's Instagram.
It already exists.

1794
01:03:22,099 --> 01:03:24,266
It's one of the most
popular apps in the world.

1795
01:03:24,268 --> 01:03:27,803
Facebook bought 'em
for, like, a billion dollars.
That's "billion" with a "B."

1796
01:03:27,805 --> 01:03:29,504
Oh, no, no. Mine is
very different than that.

1797
01:03:29,506 --> 01:03:29,504
How is yours something
"very different" than that?

1798
01:03:29,506 --> 01:03:32,774
Because, in mine, you're taking
the photo instantaneously,

1799
01:03:32,776 --> 01:03:34,142
you're putting the photo
out there on the line.

1800
01:03:34,144 --> 01:03:34,142
It's online.
- Yeah, I'm putting my photos
out

1801
01:03:34,144 --> 01:03:36,511
on the line
and I'm creating an exchange.

1802
01:03:36,513 --> 01:03:38,280
Yeah, that's Instagram.
- But mine's more

1803
01:03:38,282 --> 01:03:39,915
of a social sharing
on the line that's happening.

1804
01:03:39,917 --> 01:03:41,383
- Online.
- Quick interjection.

1805
01:03:41,385 --> 01:03:43,685
When you keep saying "on
the line," you do mean "online"?

1806
01:03:43,687 --> 01:03:46,688
Stuart, don't do that.
You don't do that to a man.

1807
01:03:46,690 --> 01:03:48,423
He's got a million-dollar idea
right here.

1808
01:03:48,425 --> 01:03:50,058
Billion-dollar idea.
- Even better. Let him flow.

1809
01:03:50,060 --> 01:03:51,726
Nick, I appreciate it.
You can't bring me down.

1810
01:03:51,728 --> 01:03:53,595
I'm too positive. Come here,
let me share something with you.

1811
01:03:53,597 --> 01:03:55,997
No.
- Please, come.
I'm gonna explain this

1812
01:03:55,999 --> 01:03:57,399
to you in a way that's visual.

1813
01:03:57,401 --> 01:03:58,900
He's bigger
than you. Be careful.

1814
01:03:58,902 --> 01:04:01,203
So, now you're out there,
take a photo.

1815
01:04:01,205 --> 01:04:03,006
Just a pretend one.
Go ahead.

1816
01:04:04,641 --> 01:04:06,942
Now you take that photo,
you put it on the line,

1817
01:04:06,944 --> 01:04:09,711
Online.
- ...put it on Twitter,
you put it on whatever you want.

1818
01:04:09,713 --> 01:04:11,146
That is Instagram.

1819
01:04:11,148 --> 01:04:12,681
That's Instagram.
- Hundred percent.

1820
01:04:12,683 --> 01:04:14,850
I get it. We're hip.
- We're not dummies.

1821
01:04:14,852 --> 01:04:17,586
Point taken. Now let's
go with my concept.

1822
01:04:17,588 --> 01:04:20,889
Now you've taken a
photo instantaneously,

1823
01:04:20,891 --> 01:04:22,357
or not instantaneously,

1824
01:04:22,359 --> 01:04:25,060
and then you take those
and you send those out

1825
01:04:25,062 --> 01:04:26,528
on the line.

1826
01:04:26,530 --> 01:04:29,197
Online.
- You don't have to say shit.

1827
01:04:29,199 --> 01:04:31,199
You don't. You just say,

1828
01:04:31,201 --> 01:04:33,068
"I like that photo,"
and you share that photo

1829
01:04:33,070 --> 01:04:34,436
instantaneously on the line

1830
01:04:34,438 --> 01:04:35,904
- Online.
- With your friends.

1831
01:04:35,906 --> 01:04:37,205
Now everyone's exchanging ideas.

1832
01:04:37,207 --> 01:04:38,740
Everyone's exchanging photos!

1833
01:04:38,742 --> 01:04:40,208
And that's why the photos

1834
01:04:40,210 --> 01:04:42,944
that are being shared
on the line...
- Online.

1835
01:04:42,946 --> 01:04:44,346
Will be known as
"Exchangeagram."

1836
01:04:44,348 --> 01:04:46,047
Nice!
- Holy shitballs, Billy!

1837
01:04:46,049 --> 01:04:47,482
We don't have time for this.

1838
01:04:47,484 --> 01:04:49,184
Hello, fellow interns!
Graham Hawtrey here.

1839
01:04:49,186 --> 01:04:50,552
I've taken the liberty

1840
01:04:50,554 --> 01:04:53,355
of attaching a link
to our app, which has

1841
01:04:53,357 --> 01:04:56,224
already been downloaded
230 times. Booyah!

1842
01:04:56,226 --> 01:04:58,093
Great.

1843
01:04:58,095 --> 01:04:59,461
We're gonna lose
yet another challenge,

1844
01:04:59,463 --> 01:05:00,896
we're not gonna get these jobs,

1845
01:05:00,898 --> 01:05:02,497
and our lives
are basically ruined.

1846
01:05:02,499 --> 01:05:05,233
Okay, hold on a sec.
Your life isn't ruined.

1847
01:05:05,235 --> 01:05:06,434
You guys are 21 years old.

1848
01:05:06,436 --> 01:05:08,370
You have your whole life
in front of you.

1849
01:05:08,372 --> 01:05:10,338
Do you even know what it's
like to be 21 right now?

1850
01:05:10,340 --> 01:05:11,773
I mean, a quarter of the kids

1851
01:05:11,775 --> 01:05:13,375
coming out of college
can't even get jobs.

1852
01:05:13,377 --> 01:05:14,643
That's a correct statistic.
Mother says

1853
01:05:14,645 --> 01:05:16,611
you can work hard and go
to the right school,

1854
01:05:16,613 --> 01:05:18,213
but nothing
is guaranteed anymore.

1855
01:05:18,215 --> 01:05:20,849
That's life. Sorry.

1856
01:05:20,851 --> 01:05:22,384
These guys are right.

1857
01:05:22,386 --> 01:05:25,120
The whole American Dream thing
that you guys grew up on,

1858
01:05:25,122 --> 01:05:27,555
that's all it is
nowadays... a dream.

1859
01:05:27,557 --> 01:05:29,224
You're too young
to be this cynical.

1860
01:05:29,226 --> 01:05:31,092
Do you really see
the world this way?

1861
01:05:31,094 --> 01:05:32,594
That's not how we see it.

1862
01:05:32,596 --> 01:05:35,597
It's just...
the way things are now.

1863
01:05:35,599 --> 01:05:37,198
All right, that's it.

1864
01:05:37,200 --> 01:05:38,733
Everybody up.
Here we go.

1865
01:05:38,735 --> 01:05:41,002
Let's do it.
Breath-of-fresh-air time.

1866
01:05:41,004 --> 01:05:42,203
Why? we have
work to do.

1867
01:05:42,205 --> 01:05:43,238
No, no, no.
- Uh-huh. Ah-ah!

1868
01:05:43,240 --> 01:05:44,572
Time to hit the reset button.

1869
01:05:44,574 --> 01:05:46,241
Yeah.
- We're taking it
to the street.

1870
01:05:46,243 --> 01:05:47,943
We're gonna get our heads
right, 'cause we need

1871
01:05:47,945 --> 01:05:49,611
to come together as a team,
'cause that's not happening.

1872
01:05:49,613 --> 01:05:51,179
What about the app?
- This is bigger than an app.

1873
01:05:51,181 --> 01:05:52,847
Okay, and by the way,
we do have something

1874
01:05:52,849 --> 01:05:54,582
pretty terrific in our back
pocket with that Exchangeagram.

1875
01:05:54,584 --> 01:05:56,184
Just let it marinate.
- Oh, we're holding four aces.

1876
01:05:56,186 --> 01:05:57,619
Stop saying no before
you give it a chance.

1877
01:05:57,621 --> 01:05:59,154
- Oh, yeah, that's a winner.
- Here we go.

1878
01:05:59,156 --> 01:06:00,422
Time to light it up forever

1879
01:06:00,424 --> 01:06:02,357
and never go to sleep.
- Let's go.

1880
01:06:02,359 --> 01:06:05,427
Can we talk about this
"online, on the line" thing?

1881
01:06:05,429 --> 01:06:07,595
- Please?
- We're gonna follow the morons?

1882
01:06:25,515 --> 01:06:26,748
Eh...

1883
01:06:32,289 --> 01:06:33,722
Oh, <i>xi�xie!</i>

1884
01:06:33,724 --> 01:06:36,624
My friend here says there's

1885
01:06:36,626 --> 01:06:38,727
a dance club down the street
that's supposed to be great.

1886
01:06:38,729 --> 01:06:40,328
You're shitting me.
- No, I shit you not.

1887
01:06:40,330 --> 01:06:41,663
Come on, let's hit it.

1888
01:07:17,100 --> 01:07:19,768
Are you sure
he said "dance club"?

1889
01:07:19,770 --> 01:07:21,569
You know, I was
rocking Mandarin,

1890
01:07:21,571 --> 01:07:23,772
he was rocking Cantonese...
something clearly got confused

1891
01:07:23,774 --> 01:07:26,207
in the middle, but I say,
boom goes the dynamite.

1892
01:07:26,209 --> 01:07:28,143
Happy accident, right?

1893
01:07:29,979 --> 01:07:32,414
Show you to your table?

1894
01:07:35,718 --> 01:07:38,253
Great big world
out there, my friend.

1895
01:07:38,255 --> 01:07:41,523
Just three inches up,
I beg you.

1896
01:07:41,525 --> 01:07:43,224
Yeah.

1897
01:07:43,226 --> 01:07:44,559
Any questions?

1898
01:07:45,928 --> 01:07:47,595
Oh... wow.

1899
01:07:47,597 --> 01:07:49,130
Holy...

1900
01:07:49,132 --> 01:07:50,799
shit, that's deep.

1901
01:07:53,436 --> 01:07:55,737
All right, I think
that's our cue. Here we go.

1902
01:07:55,739 --> 01:07:57,238
- Okay.
- Great. Deal with it.
- Yes.

1903
01:07:57,240 --> 01:07:59,007
Come on! Whoo!
- This is... this is good.

1904
01:07:59,009 --> 01:08:00,075
I mean, it's totally cool.

1905
01:08:00,077 --> 01:08:01,543
It's great.

1906
01:08:01,545 --> 01:08:03,278
You okay there, firecracker?

1907
01:08:03,280 --> 01:08:04,746
What? Yeah. Totally.
- All right.

1908
01:08:04,748 --> 01:08:06,714
What? This...
this is my jam.

1909
01:08:06,716 --> 01:08:08,349
I mean, this...
this here is my shit.
- No, look, I know

1910
01:08:08,351 --> 01:08:09,684
this is your shit,
but look, if you don't

1911
01:08:09,686 --> 01:08:11,319
want to be here,
I'll go grab those guys

1912
01:08:11,321 --> 01:08:12,420
by their little boners,
and we'll drag them,

1913
01:08:12,422 --> 01:08:14,189
we'll all go back on the bus.

1914
01:08:14,191 --> 01:08:17,025
Yeah, we can...
- No, no, no, don't
do that, don't do that.

1915
01:08:17,027 --> 01:08:18,393
It's just, um...

1916
01:08:18,395 --> 01:08:21,129
I've only read
about this stuff, okay?

1917
01:08:21,131 --> 01:08:25,467
Craigslist casual encounters.
<i>Twilight</i> fan fiction. Hentai.

1918
01:08:25,469 --> 01:08:26,768
What's Hentai?

1919
01:08:27,837 --> 01:08:29,437
Japanese comic books
where the women

1920
01:08:29,439 --> 01:08:31,306
get penetrated
by octopus tentacles.

1921
01:08:31,308 --> 01:08:34,142
Oh. Ah.
- Look,

1922
01:08:34,144 --> 01:08:35,176
it's just...

1923
01:08:35,178 --> 01:08:37,178
I have imagined... everything.

1924
01:08:37,180 --> 01:08:40,014
It's just I've...
I've never done... anything.

1925
01:08:40,016 --> 01:08:41,282
Hey, listen,

1926
01:08:41,284 --> 01:08:42,684
your secret's safe with us.

1927
01:08:42,686 --> 01:08:44,152
And for what it's worth,

1928
01:08:44,154 --> 01:08:47,088
your imagination is so wild,

1929
01:08:47,090 --> 01:08:50,325
reality's gonna be a breeze,
if not a letdown.

1930
01:08:50,327 --> 01:08:52,060
Thanks.

1931
01:08:52,062 --> 01:08:54,062
Show you to your table, cutie?

1932
01:09:12,448 --> 01:09:13,781
Get in here!

1933
01:09:13,783 --> 01:09:15,550
- Let's go!
- It's about time

1934
01:09:15,552 --> 01:09:18,786
- this group had a night.
- Let the good times roll!

1935
01:09:18,788 --> 01:09:21,856
- Bingo...!
- Here you go!

1936
01:09:21,858 --> 01:09:23,825
Bottoms up, Yo-Yo.
- Oh, I-I can't.

1937
01:09:23,827 --> 01:09:24,759
I-I can't.

1938
01:09:24,761 --> 01:09:26,494
What?
You're 21, right?

1939
01:09:26,496 --> 01:09:29,697
Yeah, but my mom says alcohol
numbs the brain.

1940
01:09:29,699 --> 01:09:31,833
Look, I'm not saying
a shot of tequila's

1941
01:09:31,835 --> 01:09:34,002
the first step on the
journey to self-respect,

1942
01:09:34,004 --> 01:09:37,772
but goddamn, maybe it's a
step in the right direction.

1943
01:09:37,774 --> 01:09:39,073
Maybe?

1944
01:09:39,075 --> 01:09:40,408
Your call.

1945
01:09:40,410 --> 01:09:41,943
One shot.

1946
01:09:41,945 --> 01:09:43,144
Whoo! All right!
That-a-boy!
- One shot!

1947
01:09:43,146 --> 01:09:44,546
Yeah!
- Bang it, Yo!

1948
01:09:44,548 --> 01:09:45,880
Let's go, baby!
- Yeah! That's it, baby!

1949
01:09:45,882 --> 01:09:48,082
To the night you'll
never remember!

1950
01:10:01,831 --> 01:10:03,932
Yeah!
- He's getting down, people!

1951
01:10:03,934 --> 01:10:05,867
One more!

1952
01:10:16,946 --> 01:10:19,681
Look what we got
cooking here. Ready?

1953
01:10:21,684 --> 01:10:24,285
Exchangeagram moment, bitches!

1954
01:10:27,556 --> 01:10:29,457
Ready for your first
lap dance, professor?

1955
01:10:29,459 --> 01:10:30,892
Are you kidding?
Yo-Yo stays ready.

1956
01:10:30,894 --> 01:10:32,293
That way, he doesn't have

1957
01:10:32,295 --> 01:10:34,529
to get ready.
- This is Tapioca.

1958
01:10:34,531 --> 01:10:36,931
She's studying
to be a dental assistant.

1959
01:10:36,933 --> 01:10:38,199
Enjoy!

1960
01:10:46,008 --> 01:10:48,710
- It happens all the time.

1961
01:10:48,712 --> 01:10:51,212
Some would say it's the point.

1962
01:10:56,185 --> 01:10:57,785
It's all good.

1963
01:10:57,787 --> 01:11:01,222
You might want to double up
on the underwear next time.

1964
01:11:05,362 --> 01:11:06,861
I got to tell you,

1965
01:11:06,863 --> 01:11:09,464
the reboot time is impressive.

1966
01:11:09,466 --> 01:11:11,733
Trifecta.

1967
01:11:11,735 --> 01:11:14,335
Cheers, bud.
- Hey, cheers. Cheers.

1968
01:11:42,966 --> 01:11:46,000
No way. H-Hi.

1969
01:11:46,002 --> 01:11:48,503
Is that your dance
teacher from back at Google?

1970
01:11:48,505 --> 01:11:50,905
Go talk to her.

1971
01:11:50,907 --> 01:11:52,774
Y-Yeah, for shizzle, you know,

1972
01:11:52,776 --> 01:11:54,876
I just go up and I'm, like,

1973
01:11:54,878 --> 01:11:56,778
"Y-Yo, you want to join
the Lyle-High Club?"

1974
01:11:56,780 --> 01:11:58,680
You know, Lyle, sometimes
the most radical move

1975
01:11:58,682 --> 01:12:00,148
is just to be yourself.

1976
01:12:01,216 --> 01:12:03,651
And I really like the real Lyle.

1977
01:12:03,653 --> 01:12:06,387
Yeah?
- Yeah.

1978
01:12:06,389 --> 01:12:09,257
Go on, you're burning daylight.

1979
01:12:11,661 --> 01:12:13,294
Let's do this.

1980
01:12:20,803 --> 01:12:22,270
Uh, hi.
- Okay, good.

1981
01:12:22,272 --> 01:12:25,073
Hi.
- Hi.

1982
01:12:25,075 --> 01:12:26,074
Hi.

1983
01:12:26,076 --> 01:12:27,476
Hi.
- Hi.

1984
01:12:27,911 --> 01:12:29,777
You were really good up there.

1985
01:12:29,779 --> 01:12:31,446
I mean, that was
amaz... I...

1986
01:12:31,448 --> 01:12:33,414
Not in... not in,
like, a sexual way.

1987
01:12:33,416 --> 01:12:34,549
Well, kind of in a sexual way.

1988
01:12:34,551 --> 01:12:36,284
It was... you're very talented.

1989
01:12:36,286 --> 01:12:37,752
Everything you do is special,

1990
01:12:37,754 --> 01:12:39,087
is what I'm saying.

1991
01:12:39,089 --> 01:12:40,988
I'm-I'm just...
I'm so embarrassed.

1992
01:12:40,990 --> 01:12:42,457
What? You're embar...
Are you kidding?

1993
01:12:42,459 --> 01:12:43,858
Now we're even, because dancing

1994
01:12:43,860 --> 01:12:46,027
in your class at Google
was one of the most

1995
01:12:46,029 --> 01:12:49,297
embarrassing moments of m'life.

1996
01:12:49,299 --> 01:12:52,734
Well, if it makes you feel
any better, I don't remember
anything specifically awful.

1997
01:12:52,736 --> 01:12:56,104
Oh, poop. You don't
remem... you don't...

1998
01:12:56,106 --> 01:12:59,374
Well, then that means
we're not even, and...

1999
01:12:59,376 --> 01:13:01,976
there's only one very
unfortunate way to fix that.

2000
01:13:01,978 --> 01:13:03,378
Oh.

2001
01:13:06,249 --> 01:13:08,649
Okay, yes, all right,

2002
01:13:08,651 --> 01:13:10,718
that is burned in my memory.
You can stop now.

2003
01:13:10,720 --> 01:13:12,453
How about I stop...

2004
01:13:12,455 --> 01:13:14,188
if and only if...
- Yes?

2005
01:13:14,190 --> 01:13:15,757
I can buy you a drink?

2006
01:13:15,759 --> 01:13:19,293
I would love that.

2007
01:13:19,295 --> 01:13:20,328
Yeah?
- Yeah.

2008
01:13:20,330 --> 01:13:21,362
Shots?

2009
01:13:21,364 --> 01:13:23,431
Yes. Shots.
- Shots.

2010
01:14:04,274 --> 01:14:06,741
I-I love teaching
at Google,

2011
01:14:06,743 --> 01:14:08,576
but it's only part-time,
and it doesn't cover

2012
01:14:08,578 --> 01:14:09,844
my tuition, so I augment.

2013
01:14:09,846 --> 01:14:11,379
No, don't augment;
you look perfect

2014
01:14:11,381 --> 01:14:12,847
the way you are.
- Aw.

2015
01:14:12,849 --> 01:14:14,882
Thanks.
- Could I get a dance?

2016
01:14:14,884 --> 01:14:16,584
Not now.
- Look, bitch,
I don't know

2017
01:14:16,586 --> 01:14:17,985
who you think this geek is,

2018
01:14:17,987 --> 01:14:20,521
but I spend a shitload
of <i>diner</i> in this place

2019
01:14:20,523 --> 01:14:22,323
and I expect to nut.

2020
01:14:22,325 --> 01:14:24,759
Yeah, I know, I'm totally
a geek, Biff Tannen. Huh?

2021
01:14:24,761 --> 01:14:26,427
Who's Biff Tannen?

2022
01:14:26,429 --> 01:14:29,430
You're, um, Biff from
<i>Back to the Future,</i> right?

2023
01:14:29,432 --> 01:14:31,833
You want to take this outside?
- No, I think I'd rather

2024
01:14:31,835 --> 01:14:33,401
stay here and talk
to the pretty girl.

2025
01:14:33,403 --> 01:14:35,204
Yeah, well,
let's rock, not talk.
- Hey, man...

2026
01:14:35,205 --> 01:14:37,305
Stop it.
- Hey, is there
a problem here?

2027
01:14:37,307 --> 01:14:39,874
It looks like somebody needs
their two way older brothers

2028
01:14:39,876 --> 01:14:41,609
to fight for them, huh?

2029
01:14:41,611 --> 01:14:44,779
Oh, and it's the
United Colors of Nerd.

2030
01:14:44,781 --> 01:14:46,414
Do all you guys work together?

2031
01:14:46,416 --> 01:14:48,749
I'm gonna out on a limb
and say it's a tech company.

2032
01:14:48,751 --> 01:14:50,284
Free cereal and ugly people?

2033
01:14:50,286 --> 01:14:51,619
Oh, whoa! Hey!

2034
01:14:51,621 --> 01:14:53,387
Come on, take it easy.

2035
01:14:53,389 --> 01:14:54,722
Is this the Jets and the Sharks?

2036
01:14:54,724 --> 01:14:56,290
So why don't you guys
head that way,

2037
01:14:56,292 --> 01:14:58,392
we'll head this way,
and never the twain shall meet.

2038
01:14:58,394 --> 01:14:59,961
Have a great night.

2039
01:14:59,963 --> 01:15:02,830
That's a good idea.

2040
01:15:18,046 --> 01:15:20,681
My mother hits harder than you!

2041
01:15:22,085 --> 01:15:24,519
Yeah! Down goes
Frazier! Whoo!

2042
01:15:26,356 --> 01:15:28,623
What's up! Oh, shit!

2043
01:15:28,625 --> 01:15:30,224
See you again!
I'll kill you!

2044
01:15:30,226 --> 01:15:32,026
Hide your kids!
Hide your wife!

2045
01:15:32,028 --> 01:15:34,562
That's how you party!

2046
01:15:37,700 --> 01:15:39,000
We're too hot to party...

2047
01:15:39,002 --> 01:15:40,535
that's why they
got to kick us out.

2048
01:15:40,537 --> 01:15:42,136
'Cause they're gonna
call the fire department.

2049
01:15:42,138 --> 01:15:43,838
Why don't you bring it
outside to party?

2050
01:15:43,840 --> 01:15:45,973
- No more fun.
- Come on.

2051
01:15:47,075 --> 01:15:48,876
Look at that view.

2052
01:15:48,878 --> 01:15:50,745
Come on, you're
not gonna see that

2053
01:15:50,747 --> 01:15:52,113
on your little
four-inch screen.

2054
01:15:52,115 --> 01:15:55,016
- You got to look up.
- Yeah.

2055
01:15:55,018 --> 01:15:58,052
Okay, buddy, you were
an animal out there tonight.

2056
01:15:58,054 --> 01:16:00,054
Right.
No, you were.

2057
01:16:00,056 --> 01:16:01,789
Did you have a good time?

2058
01:16:01,791 --> 01:16:04,425
Yeah, it was all right.
- "It was all right."

2059
01:16:04,427 --> 01:16:05,693
Why do you do that?

2060
01:16:05,695 --> 01:16:07,395
What do you mean?
Do what?

2061
01:16:07,397 --> 01:16:08,829
Lowball me like that.

2062
01:16:08,831 --> 01:16:10,932
Come on, I'm not
gonna take away your

2063
01:16:10,934 --> 01:16:13,000
"cool guy" card if you
admit you give a shit

2064
01:16:13,002 --> 01:16:16,337
about something or, God forbid,
you had a great time.

2065
01:16:17,372 --> 01:16:19,507
Um...

2066
01:16:19,509 --> 01:16:21,609
all right, it was fun.

2067
01:16:21,611 --> 01:16:23,377
Stewie...

2068
01:16:23,379 --> 01:16:25,246
What?
- Come on.

2069
01:16:25,248 --> 01:16:26,781
All right, what?
What do you want me to say,

2070
01:16:26,783 --> 01:16:27,982
it was the best
night of my life?

2071
01:16:27,984 --> 01:16:30,017
Only if it's true.

2072
01:16:32,788 --> 01:16:35,890
All right, it was the
best night of my life.

2073
01:16:35,892 --> 01:16:37,725
My Noogler!

2074
01:16:37,727 --> 01:16:40,328
Come here!
- My Noogler.

2075
01:16:40,330 --> 01:16:42,663
Wow, I don't believe there
hasn't been one boyfriend

2076
01:16:42,665 --> 01:16:44,565
along the way.
- Nope.

2077
01:16:44,567 --> 01:16:46,233
That's embarrassing.

2078
01:16:46,235 --> 01:16:48,235
Well, it's nothing
to be embarrassed of.

2079
01:16:48,237 --> 01:16:50,938
You got plenty
of time for that.

2080
01:16:50,940 --> 01:16:52,974
I mean, you're
the whole package.

2081
01:16:52,976 --> 01:16:55,142
You're beautiful,

2082
01:16:55,144 --> 01:16:56,744
you're smart,
you got great teeth.

2083
01:16:56,746 --> 01:16:58,079
You do.

2084
01:16:58,081 --> 01:17:00,681
Unbelievable chompers on
the old girl, I mean it.

2085
01:17:00,683 --> 01:17:02,850
For sure. And, uh...

2086
01:17:02,852 --> 01:17:04,719
terrific shoes...
I'm always excited

2087
01:17:04,721 --> 01:17:07,054
to see what kind of getup
you're gonna throw together.

2088
01:17:07,056 --> 01:17:08,756
That part's true.
- Well, it is true.

2089
01:17:08,758 --> 01:17:10,157
A lot of great things going.

2090
01:17:10,159 --> 01:17:11,959
Some guy's gonna find
himself very lucky

2091
01:17:11,961 --> 01:17:13,427
to be next to you.

2092
01:17:13,429 --> 01:17:15,062
Yeah, I'm not so sure.

2093
01:17:15,064 --> 01:17:18,566
Well, I am. And I've been
around a little bit.

2094
01:17:18,568 --> 01:17:20,568
I'm positive.

2095
01:17:32,982 --> 01:17:35,916
Looks like you hit it off
with Saffron tonight.

2096
01:17:35,918 --> 01:17:37,251
I'm texting her
that I love her,

2097
01:17:37,253 --> 01:17:39,153
and I'm sending her
this picture I just took

2098
01:17:39,155 --> 01:17:41,055
of little Lyle when
he made pee in the bushes.

2099
01:17:41,057 --> 01:17:43,190
Look, he's winking.
No, Lyle,
Lyle, Lyle,

2100
01:17:43,192 --> 01:17:45,026
that's a horrible idea.

2101
01:17:45,028 --> 01:17:47,662
Please don't do that.
You're drunk off your ass.

2102
01:17:47,664 --> 01:17:49,130
I appreciate your concern,

2103
01:17:49,132 --> 01:17:51,332
but I'm flying, baby.

2104
01:17:51,334 --> 01:17:52,867
Okay, Lyle, you're not flying.

2105
01:17:52,869 --> 01:17:54,368
What's 17 squared?

2106
01:17:54,370 --> 01:17:56,404
289. Why?

2107
01:17:56,406 --> 01:17:58,139
Give me a harder
question than that.

2108
01:17:58,141 --> 01:17:59,807
You know where I'm
driving with this.

2109
01:17:59,809 --> 01:18:01,542
Try, uh, maybe square root
of 17.

2110
01:18:01,544 --> 01:18:02,943
Like, 4.23, maybe?

2111
01:18:02,945 --> 01:18:04,412
That's the app.

2112
01:18:04,414 --> 01:18:06,981
That's the app
we should do right there.

2113
01:18:06,983 --> 01:18:08,582
What?
- Some quiz question
you got to answer

2114
01:18:08,584 --> 01:18:12,820
before you can send a drunk text
or a drunk e-mail or phone call,

2115
01:18:12,822 --> 01:18:14,789
something to protect you
from yourself.

2116
01:18:14,791 --> 01:18:16,223
That's good.
Can we do that?

2117
01:18:16,225 --> 01:18:18,559
Hells, yeah, we could do that.
- Are you shitting me?

2118
01:18:18,561 --> 01:18:21,095
I could program the shit
out of that bitch

2119
01:18:21,097 --> 01:18:23,664
on the bus ride home.
Well,
I'll take that

2120
01:18:23,666 --> 01:18:26,100
as an overwhelming yes, then!
Come on!
Let's roll!

2121
01:18:26,102 --> 01:18:28,269
- Let's get back to HQ!
- Hey, wait, wait.

2122
01:18:28,271 --> 01:18:30,071
Let's-let's stay, like,
five minutes, you know?

2123
01:18:30,073 --> 01:18:32,273
Just enjoy the view
a little more.

2124
01:18:33,375 --> 01:18:34,809
All right.

2125
01:18:34,811 --> 01:18:35,810
Yeah?

2126
01:18:35,812 --> 01:18:37,611
Wow. Yeah.

2127
01:18:53,361 --> 01:18:55,296
Oh, the whole world looks like

2128
01:18:55,298 --> 01:18:57,698
a giant pinwheel of death
right now.

2129
01:18:57,700 --> 01:18:59,767
Price of making
memories, Stewie.

2130
01:18:59,769 --> 01:19:02,036
I think my liver hurts.

2131
01:19:02,038 --> 01:19:04,939
Astonishingly, your app

2132
01:19:04,941 --> 01:19:06,774
received ten times
more downloads

2133
01:19:06,776 --> 01:19:08,175
than any other team's.

2134
01:19:09,277 --> 01:19:10,644
It appears that you have won

2135
01:19:10,646 --> 01:19:11,746
your first challenge.

2136
01:19:11,748 --> 01:19:12,913
How about it?

2137
01:19:12,915 --> 01:19:14,548
- Congratulations.
- Oh, yeah!

2138
01:19:14,550 --> 01:19:17,251
Come on, baby.
- The lead!

2139
01:19:19,522 --> 01:19:21,255
Oh, easy there, big guy.

2140
01:19:23,192 --> 01:19:25,693
He gets overexcited.

2141
01:19:25,695 --> 01:19:27,495
Lovely.

2142
01:19:27,497 --> 01:19:29,396
Let it out.

2143
01:19:29,398 --> 01:19:31,098
Let it out, little feller.

2144
01:19:34,369 --> 01:19:35,836
That's what I'm
talking about. Right there!

2145
01:19:35,838 --> 01:19:37,938
Yeah! Right there!

2146
01:19:52,655 --> 01:19:54,355
You got it, you
got it, you got it,

2147
01:19:54,357 --> 01:19:55,523
you got it, you got it.

2148
01:19:55,525 --> 01:19:57,558
Keep going. Come on.
Come on, Neha.

2149
01:19:57,560 --> 01:19:58,993
You got it, you got it.

2150
01:20:16,878 --> 01:20:18,379
Logan, I'd have Jean...

2151
01:20:18,381 --> 01:20:20,581
Our Professor X was
way meaner than this guy.

2152
01:20:20,583 --> 01:20:21,782
- You're not kidding.

2153
01:20:21,784 --> 01:20:23,250
It wasn't funny at the time.

2154
01:20:31,761 --> 01:20:33,027
So, you see, what I'm
doing right now

2155
01:20:33,029 --> 01:20:36,030
is I'm supercharging
my CSS and HTML skills,

2156
01:20:36,032 --> 01:20:37,832
'cause you can do them
both simultaneously.

2157
01:20:37,834 --> 01:20:39,633
HTML5, right?

2158
01:20:39,635 --> 01:20:43,571
That's one step beyond the HTML5
that they mentioned
the other day

2159
01:20:43,573 --> 01:20:46,207
with the CSS3,
remember?
- No.

2160
01:20:46,209 --> 01:20:47,641
Guys, when it comes
to writing code,

2161
01:20:47,643 --> 01:20:49,643
you've got your choice
of a number of editors.

2162
01:20:49,645 --> 01:20:52,246
Editors such as Emacs,
nano and vi...

2163
01:20:52,248 --> 01:20:53,447
What? What does that mean?

2164
01:20:53,449 --> 01:20:54,882
Have features
like syntax highlighting

2165
01:20:54,884 --> 01:20:56,884
and syntax specific
autocomplete.

2166
01:20:56,886 --> 01:20:57,885
Any questions?

2167
01:20:59,855 --> 01:21:03,324
It occurred to me, why not
use Emacs rather than vi

2168
01:21:03,326 --> 01:21:05,626
as the default editor
for Ubuntu?

2169
01:21:05,628 --> 01:21:09,730
That's actually...
a very good thought, Nick.

2170
01:21:09,732 --> 01:21:10,998
Thank you.

2171
01:21:11,000 --> 01:21:13,067
Vi versus Emacs
is a constant debate.

2172
01:21:13,069 --> 01:21:15,102
Moving on...

2173
01:21:15,104 --> 01:21:19,073
Let's talk integrated
personal development.

2174
01:21:29,685 --> 01:21:31,452
Sammy.

2175
01:21:31,454 --> 01:21:33,487
What, did you forget an insult?

2176
01:21:33,489 --> 01:21:35,990
Billy, you magnificent
son of a bitch.

2177
01:21:35,992 --> 01:21:37,324
How's unemployment?
Listen.

2178
01:21:37,326 --> 01:21:39,293
I want you two
to come work for me.

2179
01:21:39,295 --> 01:21:40,961
Sammy, my boy,
I thought you retired.

2180
01:21:40,963 --> 01:21:43,497
I did, Nicky, I did,
but I have stumbled

2181
01:21:43,499 --> 01:21:46,000
onto King Solomon's Mines,
my friends.

2182
01:21:46,002 --> 01:21:48,068
Motorized scooters.

2183
01:21:48,070 --> 01:21:49,336
Head down to Modesto.

2184
01:21:49,338 --> 01:21:50,638
Start checking out
the old-age homes.

2185
01:21:50,640 --> 01:21:52,373
Ah, Sammy, we already
have the gig here.

2186
01:21:52,375 --> 01:21:54,108
Whoa, whoa, we-we-we...
we got a new gig.

2187
01:21:54,110 --> 01:21:55,242
Yeah, we're interns at Google.

2188
01:21:55,244 --> 01:21:56,343
Interns at Google?

2189
01:21:56,345 --> 01:21:57,711
Who are you kidding?

2190
01:21:57,713 --> 01:21:58,712
You're salesmen.

2191
01:21:58,714 --> 01:22:00,214
This is a sales gig.

2192
01:22:00,216 --> 01:22:02,149
It's a job.
- Sammy, we've had
lots of jobs.

2193
01:22:02,151 --> 01:22:03,684
We're trying to build
a future here.

2194
01:22:03,686 --> 01:22:05,486
And I'm trying
to get hard on my own,

2195
01:22:05,488 --> 01:22:06,987
but the Cialis is a guarantee.

2196
01:22:06,989 --> 01:22:08,956
You finish up
with this "internship,"

2197
01:22:08,958 --> 01:22:10,391
who knows what's
going to happen?

2198
01:22:10,393 --> 01:22:11,859
Exactly. Who knows
what's going to happen?

2199
01:22:11,861 --> 01:22:13,761
That's what I'm saying.
Why are you repeating

2200
01:22:13,763 --> 01:22:15,796
what I'm saying?
- Shh. Time for baby
to go night-night.

2201
01:22:15,798 --> 01:22:18,632
No. What? You're...
Billy, you're cutting out.
- Shh...

2202
01:22:18,634 --> 01:22:19,800
That felt great.

2203
01:22:24,306 --> 01:22:26,273
You know what? I'll catch up
with you later, okay?

2204
01:22:26,275 --> 01:22:28,195
All right.
I'll see you in a bit.

2205
01:22:28,843 --> 01:22:31,011
You know, if this
is being a workaholic,

2206
01:22:31,013 --> 01:22:32,513
maybe I should get a glass.

2207
01:22:32,515 --> 01:22:35,082
I have 15 minutes
until my next meeting.

2208
01:22:35,084 --> 01:22:36,550
Okay, well, here's the thing.

2209
01:22:36,552 --> 01:22:38,519
You know how we were talking
about regret and...

2210
01:22:38,521 --> 01:22:40,454
I remember you talking
about regret.

2211
01:22:40,456 --> 01:22:42,022
Well, I don't want to add

2212
01:22:42,024 --> 01:22:43,657
"not asking you out"
to that list,

2213
01:22:43,659 --> 01:22:45,893
because that credit card
is maxed out.

2214
01:22:45,895 --> 01:22:47,528
Okay, so can we establish

2215
01:22:47,530 --> 01:22:49,830
you are, in fact,
asking me out on a date?

2216
01:22:49,832 --> 01:22:52,399
Yes. And I figure that I'm such
a mountain of mistakes

2217
01:22:52,401 --> 01:22:55,102
that going out with me
just once this evening

2218
01:22:55,104 --> 01:22:56,704
will be like packing ten years

2219
01:22:56,706 --> 01:22:59,907
of bad experiences into,
you know, one night.

2220
01:22:59,909 --> 01:23:00,941
Okay. Fine.

2221
01:23:00,943 --> 01:23:03,210
Yes?
- I'm saying yes.

2222
01:23:03,212 --> 01:23:04,812
Great. Great. Okay.
- I'm in.

2223
01:23:04,814 --> 01:23:07,181
All right. Yeah.
- Well, I'll leave
you to it.

2224
01:23:07,183 --> 01:23:09,063
Okay. Tonight. Yes.
- Good. Okay.

2225
01:23:14,356 --> 01:23:15,990
Hello, William.

2226
01:23:15,992 --> 01:23:17,224
I've been watching you.

2227
01:23:17,226 --> 01:23:18,426
You should choose your words

2228
01:23:18,427 --> 01:23:20,094
a little more carefully
in a bathhouse.

2229
01:23:20,096 --> 01:23:22,162
In the words of Nelly...

2230
01:23:22,164 --> 01:23:24,264
"It's getting hot in herre."

2231
01:23:24,266 --> 01:23:26,433
It's getting hot out there, too.

2232
01:23:26,435 --> 01:23:28,135
You definitely
got my attention.

2233
01:23:28,137 --> 01:23:31,271
All right... I'm feeling like
I want to go put my robe on now.

2234
01:23:31,273 --> 01:23:33,007
Enough to do
a little research on you.

2235
01:23:33,009 --> 01:23:34,341
What did we find out?

2236
01:23:34,343 --> 01:23:36,076
Let's see.

2237
01:23:36,078 --> 01:23:38,379
Your, uh... your company
was shut down.

2238
01:23:38,381 --> 01:23:40,347
Your home was foreclosed upon.

2239
01:23:40,349 --> 01:23:42,716
Your credit score
is actually negative.

2240
01:23:42,718 --> 01:23:44,485
That's kind of amazing, Billy.

2241
01:23:44,487 --> 01:23:46,053
That's hard to do.

2242
01:23:46,055 --> 01:23:47,955
You try hard, McMahon.

2243
01:23:47,957 --> 01:23:50,457
I'll give you that.

2244
01:23:50,459 --> 01:23:53,494
But things never quite
work out for you, do they?

2245
01:23:53,496 --> 01:23:56,697
So, I could waste my energy
trying to beat you,

2246
01:23:56,699 --> 01:24:02,102
but it seems, given enough time,
you always find a way to fail.

2247
01:24:02,104 --> 01:24:04,271
I just need to get
out of your way.

2248
01:24:04,273 --> 01:24:06,407
So this is me going.

2249
01:24:11,146 --> 01:24:13,180
Only two challenges remain,

2250
01:24:13,182 --> 01:24:15,249
after which
a mere handful of you

2251
01:24:15,251 --> 01:24:18,152
will be offered
full-time employment.

2252
01:24:18,154 --> 01:24:21,789
Now, the next challenge
is manning the Google helpline.

2253
01:24:21,791 --> 01:24:25,192
This is one of the most
difficult jobs we have...

2254
01:24:25,194 --> 01:24:27,394
combining both
customer relations

2255
01:24:27,396 --> 01:24:29,463
and product fluency.

2256
01:24:29,465 --> 01:24:32,566
You will be judged on both.

2257
01:24:32,568 --> 01:24:37,671
This is a very tight race
right now.

2258
01:24:40,341 --> 01:24:42,109
I suggest you study up.

2259
01:24:45,680 --> 01:24:47,548
All right.
Let's drill it and kill it.

2260
01:24:47,550 --> 01:24:49,716
Authorization failure
with Google Drive. Neha.

2261
01:24:49,718 --> 01:24:51,518
Permission's probably changed.

2262
01:24:51,520 --> 01:24:53,253
Request document access.
- Bam!

2263
01:24:53,255 --> 01:24:55,122
Chrome connectivity issue.
Nick.

2264
01:24:55,124 --> 01:24:56,723
Unselect proxy server
for your LAN.

2265
01:24:56,725 --> 01:24:58,092
Nice.

2266
01:24:58,094 --> 01:25:00,194
Billy, I'm locked out
of my Google Wallet account.

2267
01:25:00,196 --> 01:25:01,261
Is that under Gmail
or Wallet Help?

2268
01:25:01,263 --> 01:25:02,863
"Uh, I don't know, sir.

2269
01:25:02,865 --> 01:25:04,865
That's kind of what
I called you for."
- Right.

2270
01:25:04,867 --> 01:25:06,900
Here's the deal. I'm pretty
terrific on the phones.

2271
01:25:06,902 --> 01:25:09,436
I could sell prosciutto
to a rabbi, and I have.

2272
01:25:09,438 --> 01:25:10,971
Except you're not here
to sell anything.

2273
01:25:10,973 --> 01:25:12,406
Yeah, Billy,
you're not going to be able

2274
01:25:12,408 --> 01:25:13,941
to bullshit your way
through this one.

2275
01:25:13,943 --> 01:25:15,843
I mean, the only way to nail
this challenge is to study.

2276
01:25:15,845 --> 01:25:17,478
You just... you just
got to do it, man.

2277
01:25:17,480 --> 01:25:18,946
Well, great. Then study up
is what I'm going to do.

2278
01:25:18,948 --> 01:25:20,681
I'm going to study up.

2279
01:25:20,683 --> 01:25:23,317
Let me ask you, is there,
like, as a general rule,

2280
01:25:23,319 --> 01:25:24,651
like, a blanket statement

2281
01:25:24,653 --> 01:25:25,652
I could say that could apply

2282
01:25:25,654 --> 01:25:26,954
to literally anything?

2283
01:25:26,956 --> 01:25:28,755
And then I'm either
going to shove

2284
01:25:28,757 --> 01:25:30,657
product down their face, right,

2285
01:25:30,659 --> 01:25:32,459
or I'm going to give them
another hotline?

2286
01:25:32,461 --> 01:25:33,727
What you are exactly
is tech support.

2287
01:25:33,729 --> 01:25:35,129
So, if you referred
them to another

2288
01:25:35,131 --> 01:25:36,396
phone number, what would happen

2289
01:25:36,398 --> 01:25:38,132
is that your phone
would ring again,

2290
01:25:38,134 --> 01:25:39,900
'cause you'd be the number
that they were referring to.

2291
01:25:39,902 --> 01:25:41,802
What I'm suggesting
is give me the blanket thing

2292
01:25:41,804 --> 01:25:43,604
where I'm not necessarily wrong,
I'm not necessarily right,

2293
01:25:43,606 --> 01:25:45,172
and then I'll either hit them
with another helpline,

2294
01:25:45,174 --> 01:25:47,708
a real helpline, or I'll push
some product on them.

2295
01:25:47,710 --> 01:25:49,243
You want me to shove some
product down their throat?

2296
01:25:49,245 --> 01:25:50,677
'Cause I'll do it.
- Full disclosure:

2297
01:25:50,679 --> 01:25:52,579
I think you're working
harder than you have to.

2298
01:25:52,581 --> 01:25:55,282
All you have to do is click
the button and read.

2299
01:25:55,284 --> 01:25:56,884
- I got it.

2300
01:25:56,886 --> 01:25:58,318
Bam. Done. Read it.

2301
01:25:58,320 --> 01:26:00,220
I got it. I'll do it.

2302
01:26:00,222 --> 01:26:01,588
That's my man, Bill.
All right.

2303
01:26:01,590 --> 01:26:03,023
It's going to be fine.
- You'll get it.

2304
01:26:03,025 --> 01:26:04,558
How's everybody else doing?

2305
01:26:04,560 --> 01:26:06,059
- Yeah, I'm good.
- Okay.

2306
01:26:08,429 --> 01:26:10,430
Is it just me,

2307
01:26:10,432 --> 01:26:12,266
or is this food
incredible, right?

2308
01:26:12,268 --> 01:26:13,834
You're a liar.

2309
01:26:13,836 --> 01:26:14,902
What do you mean?

2310
01:26:14,904 --> 01:26:16,837
You were supposed
to be an asshole.

2311
01:26:16,839 --> 01:26:18,639
Come on.

2312
01:26:18,641 --> 01:26:20,908
You were supposed to
pack a decade worth

2313
01:26:20,910 --> 01:26:24,077
of jerks and bad dates
into one night.

2314
01:26:24,079 --> 01:26:25,078
Yeah.
- Remember?

2315
01:26:25,080 --> 01:26:26,313
All right, now I remember. Yes.

2316
01:26:26,315 --> 01:26:27,381
But so far,

2317
01:26:27,383 --> 01:26:29,950
you've been... totally fine.

2318
01:26:29,952 --> 01:26:31,185
Totally fine?

2319
01:26:31,187 --> 01:26:32,586
Yeah.
- Wha-wha.

2320
01:26:32,588 --> 01:26:33,921
No, I have dropped the ball.

2321
01:26:33,923 --> 01:26:35,889
I did promise that,
and I haven't delivered.

2322
01:26:35,891 --> 01:26:38,926
You know what?
Can we get the check, please?

2323
01:26:38,928 --> 01:26:40,627
May we get the check when you
get a chance, Jennifer?

2324
01:26:40,629 --> 01:26:41,962
How'd you know my...?

2325
01:26:41,964 --> 01:26:44,631
Well, it says right here
on this little necklace.

2326
01:26:44,633 --> 01:26:46,633
And now that I got the name,
how about the number?

2327
01:26:46,635 --> 01:26:47,701
Ah... I'm just kidding.

2328
01:26:47,703 --> 01:26:50,504
Or maybe I'm not kidding.

2329
01:26:50,506 --> 01:26:51,905
You're so cute.

2330
01:26:51,907 --> 01:26:53,407
So beautiful. Wow.

2331
01:26:53,409 --> 01:26:55,876
Did you just
hit on the waitress?

2332
01:26:55,878 --> 01:26:57,778
I did. Yes, yes.

2333
01:26:57,780 --> 01:26:59,346
The lady asked for a jerk,

2334
01:26:59,348 --> 01:27:01,415
and I am trying to live up
to my promise.

2335
01:27:01,417 --> 01:27:03,584
I said ten years of assholes,

2336
01:27:03,586 --> 01:27:05,819
so, you know, you got
some ground to cover.

2337
01:27:05,821 --> 01:27:08,422
You know what? I think
you've had enough dessert.

2338
01:27:08,424 --> 01:27:10,324
I've been watching you
eat all night.

2339
01:27:10,326 --> 01:27:12,392
Okay, let me take care of this,

2340
01:27:12,394 --> 01:27:13,760
because you've got
to watch your figure.

2341
01:27:13,762 --> 01:27:15,062
And you're right on
the borderline.

2342
01:27:15,064 --> 01:27:16,230
You know what they say:

2343
01:27:16,232 --> 01:27:18,532
"A moment on the lips,
forever on the hips," right?

2344
01:27:18,534 --> 01:27:20,400
Mmm, this is divine.

2345
01:27:20,402 --> 01:27:22,636
Oh, you do not know
what you are missing.

2346
01:27:22,638 --> 01:27:24,238
It's incredible.
- That's nice. That's nice.

2347
01:27:24,240 --> 01:27:26,473
But here's something you
aren't missing... this check.

2348
01:27:26,475 --> 01:27:29,042
Because I got the cab,
so there you go.

2349
01:27:32,047 --> 01:27:33,580
Oh.

2350
01:27:33,582 --> 01:27:35,048
Jennifer.

2351
01:27:35,050 --> 01:27:36,416
Bullshit!
- Right?

2352
01:27:36,418 --> 01:27:38,252
Wow, a little heart
and everything.

2353
01:27:38,254 --> 01:27:40,821
- Huh. Now, why don't you
take care of that?

2354
01:27:40,823 --> 01:27:42,122
Because the night
is still young.

2355
01:27:42,124 --> 01:27:43,423
I'm taking you
to see some dogfighting.

2356
01:27:43,425 --> 01:27:44,858
Yes, I am.

2357
01:27:44,860 --> 01:27:47,527
Rock and roll.
I think we're up to five years.

2358
01:27:47,529 --> 01:27:48,829
Yeah.

2359
01:27:48,831 --> 01:27:49,696
All right.

2360
01:27:49,698 --> 01:27:50,998
Oh... yeah,
let me get this.

2361
01:27:51,000 --> 01:27:54,201
Oh, that's a... that's amazing.

2362
01:27:57,472 --> 01:27:59,039
<i>Okay...</i>

2363
01:27:59,041 --> 01:28:03,310
"In Gmail, a 'bad request'
message shows if..."

2364
01:28:03,312 --> 01:28:05,379
Shows if...

2365
01:28:05,381 --> 01:28:07,381
"Your Internet is down."

2366
01:28:08,449 --> 01:28:10,684
Son of a bitch.

2367
01:28:10,686 --> 01:28:12,219
It shows...
- Jesus Christ!

2368
01:28:12,221 --> 01:28:14,221
You scared the shit out of me!

2369
01:28:14,223 --> 01:28:18,325
If your browser
has a bad or outdated cookie.

2370
01:28:19,661 --> 01:28:21,395
Wait, you could... with...?
- Hmm?

2371
01:28:21,397 --> 01:28:22,929
Yes.

2372
01:28:22,931 --> 01:28:24,665
I... I can hear everything.

2373
01:28:24,667 --> 01:28:27,367
I'm... I'm not actually
listening to anything.

2374
01:28:27,369 --> 01:28:29,536
This allows me
to be with myself.

2375
01:28:29,538 --> 01:28:32,806
I'm not very good
with other humans.

2376
01:28:34,309 --> 01:28:38,445
Well, I'm not very good
with Gmail Support.

2377
01:28:38,447 --> 01:28:39,780
No, actually,

2378
01:28:39,782 --> 01:28:41,248
you're quite horrible.

2379
01:28:42,651 --> 01:28:44,117
You can do this.

2380
01:28:44,119 --> 01:28:46,119
This can be learned.

2381
01:28:46,121 --> 01:28:47,788
But those kids,

2382
01:28:47,790 --> 01:28:52,125
the way that they look at you...
you have a way with people.

2383
01:28:56,332 --> 01:28:58,532
That's a lost art.

2384
01:28:58,534 --> 01:29:01,201
Go again. Go again.

2385
01:29:02,671 --> 01:29:05,238
"In Chrome..."

2386
01:29:05,240 --> 01:29:06,873
For you, this is like

2387
01:29:06,875 --> 01:29:09,109
teaching a little kid
the alphabet, right?

2388
01:29:09,111 --> 01:29:12,446
No, actually, it's like
teaching a kid a letter.

2389
01:29:12,448 --> 01:29:14,948
Just one letter.
- Yeah.

2390
01:29:14,950 --> 01:29:16,750
Yeah, you're not...
you're not... your strong point

2391
01:29:16,752 --> 01:29:18,318
would not be
communicating to humans.

2392
01:29:18,320 --> 01:29:20,987
I know.

2393
01:29:25,928 --> 01:29:28,095
All right, that was my guy.
All right.

2394
01:29:28,097 --> 01:29:29,930
Give it to me straight.
I like it.

2395
01:29:29,932 --> 01:29:31,565
No chaser.
- We're having fun.

2396
01:29:31,567 --> 01:29:33,300
I am.
I hope you are.

2397
01:29:56,557 --> 01:29:58,325
Well, thank you.

2398
01:29:58,327 --> 01:30:00,660
That was, uh, really awful.

2399
01:30:00,662 --> 01:30:02,262
Oh, you're welcome.

2400
01:30:02,264 --> 01:30:03,463
I aim to please.

2401
01:30:03,465 --> 01:30:04,731
I told you I was
going to deliver

2402
01:30:04,733 --> 01:30:06,566
on ten years of assholes,

2403
01:30:06,568 --> 01:30:08,802
and I think I did
a pretty good job.

2404
01:30:08,804 --> 01:30:10,337
It was almost a little bit
too convincing at times.

2405
01:30:10,339 --> 01:30:11,571
Was it?

2406
01:30:11,573 --> 01:30:12,639
Mm-hmm.
- That doesn't surprise me.

2407
01:30:12,641 --> 01:30:14,007
When you've been out there

2408
01:30:14,009 --> 01:30:15,809
running and gunning
for as long as I have,

2409
01:30:15,811 --> 01:30:17,612
you learn to play the game.

2410
01:30:17,613 --> 01:30:19,780
Oh. I'd be out there
laying my rap.

2411
01:30:19,782 --> 01:30:21,348
I'd have girls
literally thinking

2412
01:30:21,350 --> 01:30:22,649
I was an astronomer.

2413
01:30:22,651 --> 01:30:24,785
I'd be pointing out
constellations

2414
01:30:24,787 --> 01:30:27,487
and harvest moons.

2415
01:30:27,489 --> 01:30:28,689
"Oh, there's Pluto
over there."

2416
01:30:28,690 --> 01:30:29,956
And then they'd start

2417
01:30:29,958 --> 01:30:31,591
to fact-check you
with the Internet.

2418
01:30:31,593 --> 01:30:32,759
Oh.

2419
01:30:32,761 --> 01:30:34,428
You know, Google
has singlehandedly

2420
01:30:34,430 --> 01:30:36,396
cut into my ability
to bullshit.

2421
01:30:36,398 --> 01:30:38,832
Cramping your style?
- Big-time.

2422
01:30:38,834 --> 01:30:40,634
Making you a better person?

2423
01:30:40,636 --> 01:30:41,768
Yeah.

2424
01:30:41,770 --> 01:30:44,538
True. 90% Google...

2425
01:30:44,540 --> 01:30:46,273
ten percent you.

2426
01:30:46,275 --> 01:30:49,176
Just ten percent? Really?

2427
01:30:49,178 --> 01:30:50,277
Let's call it 20%.

2428
01:30:50,279 --> 01:30:51,778
Come on.

2429
01:30:56,117 --> 01:30:58,084
You know, I, um...

2430
01:31:00,855 --> 01:31:04,357
I really didn't expect
to like you.

2431
01:31:05,760 --> 01:31:08,261
I didn't think
you'd like me, either.

2432
01:31:15,703 --> 01:31:17,838
Thank you.

2433
01:31:23,010 --> 01:31:26,513
That was my ride home.

2434
01:31:27,682 --> 01:31:29,850
I know.

2435
01:31:38,826 --> 01:31:40,527
<i>Good morning.</i>

2436
01:31:40,529 --> 01:31:42,362
Welcome to the Google helpline.

2437
01:31:42,364 --> 01:31:44,564
You will man the phones
for exactly one hour.

2438
01:31:44,566 --> 01:31:45,699
Now, before you begin...

2439
01:31:45,701 --> 01:31:47,033
I'm so ready for this thing.

2440
01:31:47,035 --> 01:31:48,802
I was up all last
night studying.

2441
01:31:48,804 --> 01:31:51,838
This is where Team Lyle
takes the lead.

2442
01:31:51,840 --> 01:31:54,107
Icon, accessing your account

2443
01:31:54,109 --> 01:31:57,644
so that we can review
your work later.

2444
01:31:57,646 --> 01:32:00,914
The helpline... is open now.

2445
01:32:00,916 --> 01:32:02,482
Google helpline.
My name's Billy.

2446
01:32:02,484 --> 01:32:04,451
How can I help you?
- Google helpline.
This is Nick.

2447
01:32:04,453 --> 01:32:05,986
Great, so you're saying that
you're locked out of your Gmail.

2448
01:32:05,988 --> 01:32:07,354
Hello to you.

2449
01:32:07,356 --> 01:32:09,122
Well, the good news
is Uncle Bill here

2450
01:32:09,124 --> 01:32:10,891
happens to keep a key
under the mat.

2451
01:32:10,893 --> 01:32:12,459
But I'm going to play
a hunch here.

2452
01:32:12,461 --> 01:32:14,160
Delete all your cookies.

2453
01:32:14,162 --> 01:32:15,395
Did that work?

2454
01:32:15,397 --> 01:32:16,796
Great. Glad I could help.

2455
01:32:16,798 --> 01:32:18,665
Yeah, what it is,
is you probably just have

2456
01:32:18,667 --> 01:32:20,133
too many Gmails open
at the same time.

2457
01:32:20,135 --> 01:32:21,936
You want to try to go ahead
and close a couple

2458
01:32:21,937 --> 01:32:23,270
of those down
and see if that does the...?

2459
01:32:23,272 --> 01:32:24,971
Okay, great.
Thank you so much.

2460
01:32:24,973 --> 01:32:26,406
Call with anything else.
- This is Neha.

2461
01:32:26,408 --> 01:32:28,375
How can I help you?
It's not a problem.

2462
01:32:28,377 --> 01:32:30,110
You're going to click
on the gear icon,

2463
01:32:30,112 --> 01:32:31,545
then settings,
then advanced settings.

2464
01:32:31,547 --> 01:32:33,713
Yeah, you can actually have
the same tabs open

2465
01:32:33,715 --> 01:32:34,981
across all your devices.
- Yeah.

2466
01:32:34,983 --> 01:32:36,583
So the browser windows
keep on opening,

2467
01:32:36,585 --> 01:32:39,252
and then you're telling me
that that's from Amazon?

2468
01:32:39,254 --> 01:32:41,187
Your computer's got malware.
Use an antivirus software.

2469
01:32:41,189 --> 01:32:42,889
But here's what I want to do.
I want to help you clear that up

2470
01:32:42,891 --> 01:32:44,524
before the wife gets home.
Am I making sense?

2471
01:32:44,526 --> 01:32:45,926
Okay, you're going to want
to sign in to Google Wallet.

2472
01:32:45,928 --> 01:32:47,427
Update your credit card
expiration date.

2473
01:32:47,429 --> 01:32:49,129
- That's the problem.
- Well, the calendar

2474
01:32:49,131 --> 01:32:51,064
sync issue pops up
when you switch time zones.

2475
01:32:51,066 --> 01:32:52,465
Are you on vacation?

2476
01:32:52,467 --> 01:32:53,967
Miami. Very nice.

2477
01:32:53,969 --> 01:32:55,702
Well, let's get your
browser cache cleared up,

2478
01:32:55,704 --> 01:32:57,103
and then I'm going to talk you

2479
01:32:57,105 --> 01:32:58,572
through the best Cuban spots
in town there.

2480
01:32:58,574 --> 01:33:00,473
Google helpline. This is Graham.
How can I help you?

2481
01:33:00,475 --> 01:33:03,076
Okay, your device probably isn't
compatible with Google Play.

2482
01:33:03,078 --> 01:33:05,645
And I want to have you out there
salsa-ing, sweating and grinding

2483
01:33:05,647 --> 01:33:08,048
up against a complete stranger
that you don't even know,

2484
01:33:08,050 --> 01:33:09,783
having a pretty good time
doing some wrong things.

2485
01:33:09,785 --> 01:33:11,251
Are we on the same page?

2486
01:33:11,253 --> 01:33:13,119
Okay, see that box
at the bottom of your window?

2487
01:33:13,121 --> 01:33:14,955
Click that twice for me.

2488
01:33:20,262 --> 01:33:21,461
Time's up.

2489
01:33:21,463 --> 01:33:22,829
So soon? Man, I was just

2490
01:33:22,831 --> 01:33:24,230
getting warmed up here.

2491
01:33:24,232 --> 01:33:25,966
Good going here.
- Is smoke coming
off this thing?

2492
01:33:25,968 --> 01:33:27,834
Come on, Ladybug.

2493
01:33:27,836 --> 01:33:29,202
Nice.

2494
01:33:29,204 --> 01:33:31,004
Please submit your log files
so that I may review

2495
01:33:31,006 --> 01:33:32,206
- your work later.
- All right.

2496
01:33:32,207 --> 01:33:34,808
Happily.
Just click the blue button.

2497
01:33:34,810 --> 01:33:36,042
Where's that at?

2498
01:33:36,044 --> 01:33:37,310
Click the blue button,
upper left.

2499
01:33:37,312 --> 01:33:39,145
Mine's not blue.
Mine's gray.

2500
01:33:39,147 --> 01:33:41,047
Up in the corner.
It's not... I can't click it.

2501
01:33:41,049 --> 01:33:42,449
What?
No, no, the blue one.

2502
01:33:42,451 --> 01:33:43,750
Mine wasn't clicking.
Mine's gray.

2503
01:33:43,752 --> 01:33:44,951
Is anyone else's gray?

2504
01:33:44,953 --> 01:33:46,920
Did you not hear
my opening remarks?

2505
01:33:46,922 --> 01:33:49,123
Yeah, no, I heard most
of your opening remarks.

2506
01:33:49,124 --> 01:33:51,257
It's just, I was...
I was getting in the zone.

2507
01:33:51,259 --> 01:33:52,959
I was pre-gaming it.
- I was very clear

2508
01:33:52,961 --> 01:33:54,694
that you had to log
into your account

2509
01:33:54,696 --> 01:33:56,736
so that I could review
your work later.

2510
01:33:57,531 --> 01:33:58,765
Well, the good news

2511
01:33:58,767 --> 01:34:00,100
is that you
reviewed my work now.

2512
01:34:00,102 --> 01:34:01,468
You-you don't need
the instant replay

2513
01:34:01,470 --> 01:34:03,436
because you saw
the touchdown live, in person.

2514
01:34:03,438 --> 01:34:05,705
I don't really understand
that analogy,

2515
01:34:05,707 --> 01:34:08,975
but I do know
that attention to detail

2516
01:34:08,977 --> 01:34:10,944
is of paramount importance here

2517
01:34:10,946 --> 01:34:13,213
and my instructions
were explicit.

2518
01:34:13,215 --> 01:34:15,248
Now, if there's no recording,

2519
01:34:15,250 --> 01:34:18,184
then it's as if you
didn't even show up today.

2520
01:34:19,720 --> 01:34:21,087
Except I did show up.

2521
01:34:21,089 --> 01:34:23,289
I'm-I'm sitting right here,
Chetty.

2522
01:34:23,291 --> 01:34:26,926
Well, according to your log,
you're not.

2523
01:34:26,928 --> 01:34:29,996
And since every intern
must complete the challenge

2524
01:34:29,998 --> 01:34:32,699
in order for your team
to be scored...

2525
01:34:33,934 --> 01:34:35,368
your team

2526
01:34:35,370 --> 01:34:39,272
will unfortunately receive
a score of zero.

2527
01:34:40,341 --> 01:34:42,375
Zero?

2528
01:34:43,644 --> 01:34:45,745
Well done, Mr. McMahon.

2529
01:34:45,747 --> 01:34:47,747
Perhaps more studying,
less pudding.

2530
01:34:47,749 --> 01:34:49,215
Hmm?
- Chetty, come on.

2531
01:34:49,217 --> 01:34:51,584
You're not going to trip us
with a technicality.

2532
01:34:51,586 --> 01:34:53,319
He's right here.

2533
01:34:53,321 --> 01:34:56,089
Oh, Billy, Billy,
Billy, what have you done?

2534
01:34:56,091 --> 01:34:58,391
It's you lot I feel bad for.

2535
01:34:58,393 --> 01:35:00,393
It's really hard to get here.

2536
01:35:00,395 --> 01:35:02,462
Some of you are probably
pretty intelligent.

2537
01:35:02,464 --> 01:35:04,330
You deserve better.

2538
01:35:04,332 --> 01:35:06,399
I'm sorry.

2539
01:35:07,401 --> 01:35:09,869
It's all right, El Ni�o.

2540
01:35:09,871 --> 01:35:11,638
We'll get 'em.

2541
01:35:15,142 --> 01:35:17,677
I studied for the test.
I studied for...

2542
01:35:21,816 --> 01:35:23,083
Well, that's great.

2543
01:35:23,085 --> 01:35:24,384
That's another win
for Team Graham.

2544
01:35:24,386 --> 01:35:26,119
There's only one challenge left.

2545
01:35:26,121 --> 01:35:27,687
Even if we're perfect,
it won't be enough.

2546
01:35:27,689 --> 01:35:28,922
We had 'em, too.

2547
01:35:28,924 --> 01:35:30,423
We did, but,
you know, it's just

2548
01:35:30,425 --> 01:35:32,692
a little hiccup,
a little adversity, all right?

2549
01:35:32,694 --> 01:35:33,927
No, Nick, come on.

2550
01:35:33,929 --> 01:35:35,695
Face it.
Look, Billy's a great guy

2551
01:35:35,697 --> 01:35:38,398
and everything, but he kind of
blew it for us today.

2552
01:35:38,400 --> 01:35:40,500
Yeah, I know...
The kids
are right, Nick.

2553
01:35:40,502 --> 01:35:41,768
I just wanted to...

2554
01:35:41,770 --> 01:35:43,169
come by and let you guys know

2555
01:35:43,171 --> 01:35:44,504
that I...
I did study last night.

2556
01:35:44,506 --> 01:35:45,672
I tried my best.

2557
01:35:45,674 --> 01:35:47,774
It's just, uh, you know,
today on the phones,

2558
01:35:47,776 --> 01:35:49,909
I just... it's my fault.

2559
01:35:49,911 --> 01:35:52,312
And, uh...

2560
01:35:52,314 --> 01:35:54,414
He was right when he said
that you guys deserve better.

2561
01:35:54,416 --> 01:35:56,783
I'm really sorry
that I cost you.

2562
01:36:06,360 --> 01:36:08,461
Damn.

2563
01:36:11,966 --> 01:36:13,399
Billy, would you stop?

2564
01:36:13,401 --> 01:36:15,301
Let me go, Nick.
I'm not helping anybody here.

2565
01:36:15,303 --> 01:36:17,003
What do you mean,
you're not helping anybody?

2566
01:36:17,005 --> 01:36:18,204
You're helping those kids.

2567
01:36:18,206 --> 01:36:19,205
What are you doing?

2568
01:36:19,207 --> 01:36:20,540
Where are you going?

2569
01:36:20,542 --> 01:36:22,809
What, you're going to go
radio silence on me?

2570
01:36:22,811 --> 01:36:24,210
Come on,
I'm not going to let you

2571
01:36:24,212 --> 01:36:25,678
ride away from
the Garden of Eden.

2572
01:36:25,680 --> 01:36:27,147
I let down the team, Nick.

2573
01:36:27,149 --> 01:36:29,215
You didn't let down the team.

2574
01:36:29,217 --> 01:36:31,251
And who cares if
you made a mistake?

2575
01:36:31,253 --> 01:36:33,319
Nick, I'm not taking everyone
down with me.

2576
01:36:33,321 --> 01:36:35,088
Billy, let me turn
these high beams on you.

2577
01:36:35,090 --> 01:36:36,790
Give me a chance to turn you
with a sports metaphor.

2578
01:36:36,792 --> 01:36:38,091
Damn it, Nick,

2579
01:36:38,093 --> 01:36:39,626
it's the best thing
for everybody!

2580
01:36:39,628 --> 01:36:42,729
Stop dragging me down
with all your horseshit, man.

2581
01:36:42,731 --> 01:36:44,497
You're doing great here, okay?

2582
01:36:44,499 --> 01:36:47,233
I'm not. I got it.

2583
01:36:47,235 --> 01:36:49,169
Just get off my back.

2584
01:36:49,171 --> 01:36:52,672
How dare you.
How dare you.

2585
01:36:52,674 --> 01:36:54,007
Shame on you!

2586
01:36:54,009 --> 01:36:55,542
Put this badge back on!

2587
01:36:55,544 --> 01:36:57,510
If you're going to quit, quit,

2588
01:36:57,512 --> 01:37:00,713
but don't give me this crap
about it's better for the team.

2589
01:37:00,715 --> 01:37:03,483
Come on, Billy.

2590
01:37:24,538 --> 01:37:26,139
Randy?

2591
01:37:26,141 --> 01:37:28,508
So, I-I'm, uh, Billy McMahon.

2592
01:37:28,510 --> 01:37:30,844
Sammy sent me down here.
I'm the new salesman.

2593
01:37:32,479 --> 01:37:34,380
Well, no shit.

2594
01:37:34,382 --> 01:37:36,449
My new partner.

2595
01:37:36,451 --> 01:37:39,052
<i>Ladies and gentlemen,</i>
<i>it has been</i>

2596
01:37:39,054 --> 01:37:40,854
an impressive summer.

2597
01:37:40,856 --> 01:37:44,357
And one final challenge remains.

2598
01:37:44,359 --> 01:37:46,492
Sales.

2599
01:37:46,494 --> 01:37:49,662
Over a million companies
advertise with Google.

2600
01:37:49,664 --> 01:37:51,497
Find one that doesn't.

2601
01:37:51,499 --> 01:37:52,298
Convince them.

2602
01:37:52,300 --> 01:37:53,800
The bigger the sale,

2603
01:37:53,802 --> 01:37:56,769
the more chance you have
of taking this competition.

2604
01:37:56,771 --> 01:37:58,171
The winner will be announced

2605
01:37:58,173 --> 01:38:00,506
at our final meeting
this afternoon.

2606
01:38:00,508 --> 01:38:01,641
Good luck.

2607
01:38:01,643 --> 01:38:02,909
Happy hunting!

2608
01:38:02,911 --> 01:38:04,277
On me.

2609
01:38:09,783 --> 01:38:11,684
Sales, son!

2610
01:38:11,686 --> 01:38:14,754
Man, those other bitches
are going down!

2611
01:38:14,756 --> 01:38:16,389
Wait, where's Billy?

2612
01:38:16,391 --> 01:38:17,223
He left.

2613
01:38:17,225 --> 01:38:18,391
What?
- You heard him.

2614
01:38:18,393 --> 01:38:20,093
He thought he was
holding us back,

2615
01:38:20,095 --> 01:38:23,196
and he didn't want to talk
about it, that's for sure.

2616
01:38:23,198 --> 01:38:24,998
We got to get him back.

2617
01:38:25,000 --> 01:38:27,300
She's right, we're all a team...
that's what you guys taught us.

2618
01:38:27,302 --> 01:38:28,801
I mean,
it might have been buried

2619
01:38:28,803 --> 01:38:31,104
under, like, a mountain
of obscure '80s references

2620
01:38:31,106 --> 01:38:32,939
and just, you know, a ton

2621
01:38:32,941 --> 01:38:35,475
of other super inappropriate
bullshit

2622
01:38:35,477 --> 01:38:37,510
that I guess was intended
as life lessons,

2623
01:38:37,512 --> 01:38:39,045
but, I mean, you did teach us

2624
01:38:39,047 --> 01:38:40,079
how to come together, Nick.

2625
01:38:40,081 --> 01:38:41,081
You taught us that.

2626
01:38:41,082 --> 01:38:42,949
The problem is, when he makes up

2627
01:38:42,951 --> 01:38:46,686
his mind on something,
ol' Billy has a tendency

2628
01:38:46,688 --> 01:38:48,021
to really dig in.

2629
01:38:48,023 --> 01:38:49,088
We might have to get ready

2630
01:38:49,090 --> 01:38:50,356
to do this one without him.

2631
01:38:50,358 --> 01:38:53,493
Yeah, but, Nick,
we wouldn't want to.

2632
01:38:53,495 --> 01:38:54,928
Right, guys?

2633
01:39:01,101 --> 01:39:02,302
Hey, Tony!

2634
01:39:03,871 --> 01:39:04,871
Slow it down, man.

2635
01:39:04,873 --> 01:39:05,872
I'm just kidding.

2636
01:39:07,175 --> 01:39:08,776
How long you been
working this territory?

2637
01:39:08,777 --> 01:39:10,143
Three years.

2638
01:39:10,145 --> 01:39:11,577
It's great, though, you know.

2639
01:39:11,579 --> 01:39:14,414
You get to build a relationship
with the customer.

2640
01:39:14,416 --> 01:39:15,581
And then they die.

2641
01:39:15,583 --> 01:39:17,150
Suddenly you're reselling

2642
01:39:17,152 --> 01:39:20,386
scooters with 25,
35 miles on them, tops.

2643
01:39:20,388 --> 01:39:22,255
Everybody wins.

2644
01:39:22,257 --> 01:39:23,756
Hey, hey!

2645
01:39:23,758 --> 01:39:24,991
Look who's back!

2646
01:39:24,993 --> 01:39:26,793
Hey, Randy!
- Randy! How are you?

2647
01:39:27,829 --> 01:39:30,697
How's it going, old-timer?

2648
01:39:30,699 --> 01:39:32,332
Hey, Randy.

2649
01:39:32,334 --> 01:39:34,267
What do you want?

2650
01:39:34,269 --> 01:39:35,935
Treat them like shit.

2651
01:39:35,937 --> 01:39:38,104
Only makes them want you more.

2652
01:39:38,106 --> 01:39:40,273
Hey, everybody!
Listen up!

2653
01:39:40,275 --> 01:39:42,308
This is my new
tail gunner, Billy.
- Hi.

2654
01:39:42,310 --> 01:39:44,310
Billy, why don't you
tell them about that, uh,

2655
01:39:44,312 --> 01:39:46,012
sweet ride you just
pulled up on?

2656
01:39:46,014 --> 01:39:48,448
Oh, you mean
the, uh, brand-new X-70.

2657
01:39:48,450 --> 01:39:50,483
It's got an eight-hour motor.

2658
01:39:50,485 --> 01:39:52,185
And it's got a rear-mounted
stainless sleeve

2659
01:39:52,187 --> 01:39:53,720
for your oxy tank.

2660
01:39:53,722 --> 01:39:55,755
You have no idea
how much boning

2661
01:39:55,757 --> 01:39:56,856
goes on in this place.

2662
01:39:56,858 --> 01:39:58,124
It's amazing.

2663
01:39:58,126 --> 01:39:59,225
Check this one out.

2664
01:39:59,227 --> 01:40:01,027
Ethel. That's her name.

2665
01:40:01,029 --> 01:40:03,396
She calls my junk
"the cocoon."

2666
01:40:03,398 --> 01:40:04,697
Says it makes her feel younger.

2667
01:40:04,699 --> 01:40:06,099
Actually lowered
her blood pressure.

2668
01:40:06,101 --> 01:40:07,266
I'm not fighting it.

2669
01:40:07,268 --> 01:40:09,035
I'm a life-giver
and a lovemaker.

2670
01:40:09,037 --> 01:40:11,237
Ethel! Ethel!

2671
01:40:11,239 --> 01:40:13,072
- What's up, girl?!

2672
01:40:13,074 --> 01:40:14,240
Look who's back!

2673
01:40:15,243 --> 01:40:16,576
Come here, boo.
- Oh...

2674
01:40:16,578 --> 01:40:17,844
Who's your friend?
Well, hello there.

2675
01:40:17,846 --> 01:40:19,445
Billy!

2676
01:40:19,447 --> 01:40:21,247
What the hell are
you doing here?

2677
01:40:21,249 --> 01:40:23,116
What the hell
are <i>you</i> doing here?

2678
01:40:23,118 --> 01:40:24,183
Billy.

2679
01:40:24,185 --> 01:40:25,385
Hi.

2680
01:40:25,387 --> 01:40:26,719
Ethel and, uh, Doris here

2681
01:40:26,721 --> 01:40:28,955
tell me they're up for
a little group play.

2682
01:40:28,957 --> 01:40:30,523
Can I count you in?

2683
01:40:31,759 --> 01:40:34,327
What the shit?

2684
01:40:34,329 --> 01:40:36,162
Uh, I'm sorry, Randy.
This is my old partner.

2685
01:40:36,164 --> 01:40:37,363
This is Nick.

2686
01:40:37,365 --> 01:40:38,865
Nick, this is...
this is my new partner.

2687
01:40:38,867 --> 01:40:40,266
This is Randy.

2688
01:40:40,268 --> 01:40:42,969
Welcome to the jungle, <i>ese.</i>

2689
01:40:42,971 --> 01:40:43,970
What do you say, Billy?

2690
01:40:43,972 --> 01:40:45,238
Can I count you in?

2691
01:40:45,240 --> 01:40:47,040
Mind giving me
just a second here?

2692
01:40:47,042 --> 01:40:48,041
No problem.

2693
01:40:48,043 --> 01:40:49,042
What the hell are you doing?

2694
01:40:49,044 --> 01:40:50,376
New partner, huh?

2695
01:40:50,378 --> 01:40:52,045
I'm a salesman, Nick;
I sell things.

2696
01:40:52,047 --> 01:40:54,614
Yeah, I remember another guy
who was selling some things,

2697
01:40:54,616 --> 01:40:57,550
plying the mattress trade,
when in walks this behemoth...

2698
01:40:57,552 --> 01:40:59,952
big guy, big mouth,
big dream...

2699
01:40:59,954 --> 01:41:02,555
and he made this old
son of a gun remember

2700
01:41:02,557 --> 01:41:04,057
there's still some dreams
floating around out there.

2701
01:41:04,059 --> 01:41:05,391
It's not too late.

2702
01:41:05,393 --> 01:41:06,726
You just got to reach
out and grab them.

2703
01:41:06,728 --> 01:41:08,327
Damn it, Nick,
I reached for my dreams.

2704
01:41:08,329 --> 01:41:09,362
Why don't you just
leave it alone?

2705
01:41:09,364 --> 01:41:10,530
I messed it up for everybody.

2706
01:41:10,532 --> 01:41:11,597
You forgot to click a button!

2707
01:41:11,599 --> 01:41:13,833
You're not a computer wizard.

2708
01:41:13,835 --> 01:41:14,634
All right?

2709
01:41:14,636 --> 01:41:16,202
You're also not a pussy.

2710
01:41:16,204 --> 01:41:17,770
You're tough.
You grew up in the '70s.

2711
01:41:17,772 --> 01:41:19,305
Remember what that was like?

2712
01:41:19,307 --> 01:41:20,673
There weren't any computers.

2713
01:41:20,675 --> 01:41:22,075
Just like we didn't
have bike helmets

2714
01:41:22,077 --> 01:41:23,509
or sunscreens or seat belts.

2715
01:41:23,511 --> 01:41:25,044
Did you wear a seat belt?

2716
01:41:25,046 --> 01:41:26,112
No.

2717
01:41:26,114 --> 01:41:27,980
What was your seat belt?

2718
01:41:27,982 --> 01:41:29,449
My mom would go like this.

2719
01:41:29,451 --> 01:41:31,184
Yeah. It was your mom
going like that.

2720
01:41:31,186 --> 01:41:32,518
And how'd that work out?

2721
01:41:32,520 --> 01:41:33,853
You know;
I went through the windshield.

2722
01:41:33,855 --> 01:41:34,821
89 stitches.

2723
01:41:34,823 --> 01:41:36,289
Made you look like
a little bad-ass

2724
01:41:36,291 --> 01:41:37,790
all of third grade.

2725
01:41:37,792 --> 01:41:40,860
And were you afraid to get back
in that station wagon?

2726
01:41:40,862 --> 01:41:42,795
Nah. Five years later,

2727
01:41:42,797 --> 01:41:46,432
you took out that very same car
without permission from nobody.

2728
01:41:46,434 --> 01:41:48,601
Not your parents,
not Old Man Law.

2729
01:41:48,603 --> 01:41:52,872
It was just you and Sally Moran
parked at the point,

2730
01:41:52,874 --> 01:41:54,540
finger-blasting away.

2731
01:41:54,542 --> 01:41:56,542
Didn't even know if you
were doing it right.

2732
01:41:56,544 --> 01:41:58,945
Nick, wh-where you going
with this thing?

2733
01:41:58,947 --> 01:42:01,414
I'm saying life
is that station wagon.

2734
01:42:01,416 --> 01:42:02,548
All right?

2735
01:42:02,550 --> 01:42:03,850
And yeah, sometimes it's gonna

2736
01:42:03,852 --> 01:42:05,651
throw you
through the windshield,

2737
01:42:05,653 --> 01:42:08,955
crack your skull wide open,
maybe even break your heart.

2738
01:42:08,957 --> 01:42:10,490
But every once in a while,

2739
01:42:10,492 --> 01:42:12,692
it's gonna drop a Sally Moran
in your backseat.

2740
01:42:12,694 --> 01:42:14,827
Now, we came to Google
for a reason, right?

2741
01:42:14,829 --> 01:42:16,696
I can't promise
we're gonna win,

2742
01:42:16,698 --> 01:42:18,431
but we're going back there,

2743
01:42:18,433 --> 01:42:21,701
and we're gonna see those kids,
and we're gonna see it through.

2744
01:42:21,703 --> 01:42:23,503
You get your ass
back in that car,

2745
01:42:23,505 --> 01:42:24,704
and you ride.

2746
01:42:24,706 --> 01:42:27,306
You hear me,
Billy Bojangles McMahon?

2747
01:42:27,308 --> 01:42:29,509
Ride.

2748
01:42:31,845 --> 01:42:34,180
<i>"Contextual targeting</i>

2749
01:42:34,182 --> 01:42:35,948
"technology can

2750
01:42:35,950 --> 01:42:40,153
"automatically match,
um, your ads to

2751
01:42:40,155 --> 01:42:42,522
"Web pages, uh,

2752
01:42:42,524 --> 01:42:47,827
that are most relevant
to your business."

2753
01:42:47,829 --> 01:42:50,596
Yo-Yo?

2754
01:42:50,598 --> 01:42:52,064
"Review ad performance

2755
01:42:52,066 --> 01:42:53,867
"to see impressions,
- Mmm.

2756
01:42:53,868 --> 01:42:58,137
Click, cost and
conversion data."

2757
01:42:58,139 --> 01:42:59,272
Look, you seem like good kids,

2758
01:42:59,274 --> 01:43:00,907
and I appreciate
you stopping by,

2759
01:43:00,909 --> 01:43:03,342
but we're just a
family-run business.

2760
01:43:03,344 --> 01:43:04,944
We don't do the Internet.

2761
01:43:04,946 --> 01:43:06,579
Thanks for coming.

2762
01:43:06,581 --> 01:43:08,981
Frankie will get you
a slice on the way out.

2763
01:43:16,557 --> 01:43:18,658
Oi, oi.

2764
01:43:18,660 --> 01:43:20,159
Oh, great.

2765
01:43:20,161 --> 01:43:21,160
Lovely.

2766
01:43:21,162 --> 01:43:22,395
This guy.

2767
01:43:22,397 --> 01:43:24,230
Saw you checked in here
on Foursquare.

2768
01:43:24,232 --> 01:43:25,398
Thought we'd stop by.

2769
01:43:25,400 --> 01:43:26,966
That's really creepy.

2770
01:43:26,968 --> 01:43:28,167
Is that all?

2771
01:43:28,169 --> 01:43:29,669
It is all, actually.

2772
01:43:29,671 --> 01:43:31,237
We just closed a sale

2773
01:43:31,239 --> 01:43:32,772
at a coffee shop
down the street.

2774
01:43:32,774 --> 01:43:34,407
Your chances of
catching up to us

2775
01:43:34,409 --> 01:43:36,542
just went from
zero to piss-all.

2776
01:43:36,544 --> 01:43:38,444
Now, if you'll excuse us,

2777
01:43:38,446 --> 01:43:40,646
we've got to get to
the final meeting.

2778
01:43:40,648 --> 01:43:44,317
Get these jobs of which we're
so profoundly deserving.

2779
01:43:44,319 --> 01:43:46,052
Zach?

2780
01:43:46,054 --> 01:43:47,587
Eyes off the pizza, mate.

2781
01:43:47,589 --> 01:43:50,990
God made you lactose-intolerant
for a reason, yeah?

2782
01:43:50,992 --> 01:43:52,892
You're so fat.

2783
01:43:54,928 --> 01:43:56,195
You're so fat.

2784
01:43:56,197 --> 01:43:58,064
Let's go!

2785
01:43:58,066 --> 01:43:59,232
All right, on me!

2786
01:44:05,906 --> 01:44:07,907
What a douche!

2787
01:44:10,044 --> 01:44:11,244
Guys.

2788
01:44:19,419 --> 01:44:21,320
Welcome back, Billy boy.

2789
01:44:21,322 --> 01:44:22,455
Good to be with you.

2790
01:44:22,457 --> 01:44:23,856
What happened there?

2791
01:44:23,858 --> 01:44:26,158
Uh, well, he didn't bite,
so it did not go well.

2792
01:44:26,160 --> 01:44:28,294
You know who else it
didn't go well for?

2793
01:44:28,296 --> 01:44:29,695
Lay it on us, big daddy.

2794
01:44:29,697 --> 01:44:30,730
That's right,

2795
01:44:30,732 --> 01:44:32,098
the little steel town girl Alex.

2796
01:44:32,100 --> 01:44:34,033
When she finally got
her shot in front of

2797
01:44:34,035 --> 01:44:36,435
all those stuffed shirts,
she took a tumble and fell.

2798
01:44:36,437 --> 01:44:38,271
You want to hear something
totally nuts?

2799
01:44:38,273 --> 01:44:40,940
She picked herself back up,
she tightened that little ass,

2800
01:44:40,942 --> 01:44:43,309
and she pumped her legs,
and she danced herself

2801
01:44:43,311 --> 01:44:44,610
right back into their hearts

2802
01:44:44,612 --> 01:44:46,579
and into a slot
at that dance school.

2803
01:44:46,581 --> 01:44:49,749
And that's what we're gonna do.

2804
01:44:49,751 --> 01:44:52,551
Tighten your asses.
Let's go.

2805
01:44:52,553 --> 01:44:55,121
Get her done, boys.

2806
01:44:55,123 --> 01:44:58,524
Listen, guys, we've always
done things the same way:

2807
01:44:58,526 --> 01:45:00,626
Yellow Pages, flyers,
<i>San Jose Mercury News.</i>

2808
01:45:00,628 --> 01:45:01,894
Now, look, we're all

2809
01:45:01,896 --> 01:45:03,329
creatures of habit,
am I right, Sal?

2810
01:45:03,331 --> 01:45:04,463
I mean, we all like
what we know.

2811
01:45:04,465 --> 01:45:06,032
There's no question about it.

2812
01:45:06,034 --> 01:45:08,200
But you know what the
scariest thing in life is?

2813
01:45:08,202 --> 01:45:09,435
Mmm.
- The thing in life

2814
01:45:09,437 --> 01:45:10,877
that frightens us the most?

2815
01:45:11,371 --> 01:45:12,605
Change.

2816
01:45:12,607 --> 01:45:14,140
Yeah.
And by
the way, I think

2817
01:45:14,142 --> 01:45:15,908
most people are guilty
of getting set in their ways.

2818
01:45:15,910 --> 01:45:17,677
I know I need change
to come along

2819
01:45:17,679 --> 01:45:20,179
and give me a little kick
in the ass to get me moving.

2820
01:45:20,181 --> 01:45:22,815
All right, listen, guys,
I know where you're going.

2821
01:45:22,817 --> 01:45:24,417
But I'm not gonna
change anything.

2822
01:45:24,419 --> 01:45:28,821
Like I already told your
friends, we're getting by okay.

2823
01:45:28,823 --> 01:45:30,356
Sal, with all due respect, if
you fight for your limitations,

2824
01:45:30,358 --> 01:45:31,857
you get to keep them.

2825
01:45:31,859 --> 01:45:33,159
Do you hear yourself?
You're getting by okay.

2826
01:45:33,161 --> 01:45:34,794
"Okay"? I mean, Jesus!
- "Okay" isn't good.

2827
01:45:34,796 --> 01:45:36,162
I mean, "okay" isn't great.

2828
01:45:36,164 --> 01:45:37,463
I'm starting to think
this guy's selfish.

2829
01:45:37,465 --> 01:45:38,898
"Okay" isn't fantastic!

2830
01:45:38,900 --> 01:45:40,633
Look, I don't want
to get sideways with you.

2831
01:45:40,635 --> 01:45:41,701
You're as big as a barn.

2832
01:45:41,703 --> 01:45:42,902
He looks like he was carved out

2833
01:45:42,904 --> 01:45:44,236
of a damn mountain,
for God's sakes.

2834
01:45:44,238 --> 01:45:45,404
But you're an artist, okay?

2835
01:45:45,406 --> 01:45:46,472
This is great pizza!

2836
01:45:46,474 --> 01:45:47,907
Picasso with pepperoni!

2837
01:45:47,909 --> 01:45:49,375
And, hey, stop it, do not even

2838
01:45:49,377 --> 01:45:50,443
get me started on the sauce.

2839
01:45:50,445 --> 01:45:51,444
I mean, is there
nutmeg in there?

2840
01:45:51,446 --> 01:45:53,145
Something.
- So look-it, I can

2841
01:45:53,147 --> 01:45:54,814
respect the fact that you
don't want to divulge,

2842
01:45:54,816 --> 01:45:56,776
but if I'm right,
don't say anything.

2843
01:45:57,818 --> 01:45:59,652
Exactly!
- There's your answer!

2844
01:45:59,654 --> 01:46:02,154
There's your answer!
Sal, come on.

2845
01:46:02,156 --> 01:46:04,824
All I'm saying is, why should
Papa John's make all the dough,

2846
01:46:04,826 --> 01:46:06,792
when Papa Sal's got
the better sauce?

2847
01:46:06,794 --> 01:46:08,227
You know what?

2848
01:46:08,229 --> 01:46:09,862
Now you're starting
to sound like him.

2849
01:46:09,864 --> 01:46:11,931
He wants to open up
a Sal's in Los Gatos.

2850
01:46:11,933 --> 01:46:13,466
The bigger
chains are killing us.

2851
01:46:13,468 --> 01:46:14,834
We're barely staying afloat.

2852
01:46:14,836 --> 01:46:16,736
When you franchise,
you lose quality.

2853
01:46:16,738 --> 01:46:19,205
You lose the taste
that people trust.

2854
01:46:19,207 --> 01:46:20,439
You want to know why
my sauce is better?

2855
01:46:20,441 --> 01:46:22,074
I'll tell you why.

2856
01:46:22,076 --> 01:46:23,843
'Cause I go down to the
farmers' market every day,

2857
01:46:23,845 --> 01:46:25,444
I buy them tomatoes myself.

2858
01:46:25,446 --> 01:46:28,280
I walk down the street,
I get the basil, the oregano.

2859
01:46:28,282 --> 01:46:30,683
Look, guys, I know these people.

2860
01:46:30,685 --> 01:46:33,953
I'm part of the fabric
of this neighborhood.

2861
01:46:33,955 --> 01:46:35,621
That's good enough for me.

2862
01:46:35,623 --> 01:46:37,423
Sal, that's better
than good enough.

2863
01:46:37,425 --> 01:46:38,657
That's the best.

2864
01:46:38,659 --> 01:46:39,892
And we're not suggesting

2865
01:46:39,894 --> 01:46:41,293
that you abandon the
neighborhood here.

2866
01:46:41,295 --> 01:46:43,696
All we're saying is,

2867
01:46:43,698 --> 01:46:45,698
what if your neighborhood
got a little bit bigger?

2868
01:46:45,700 --> 01:46:47,032
Take a look at this, Sal.

2869
01:46:47,034 --> 01:46:50,102
These are all just people
that love your pizza.

2870
01:46:50,104 --> 01:46:52,171
Talk about word of mouth, huh?
- Yeah, they're talking

2871
01:46:52,173 --> 01:46:53,773
about you, Sal; don't you
want to talk back to them?

2872
01:46:53,775 --> 01:46:55,040
Did you know there are

2873
01:46:55,042 --> 01:46:56,642
almost as many people
from Los Gatos

2874
01:46:56,644 --> 01:46:58,644
searching for Sal's
as there are from Palo Alto?

2875
01:46:58,646 --> 01:46:59,879
Yeah, and they pop in

2876
01:46:59,881 --> 01:47:01,480
when they're in town,
but if there was

2877
01:47:01,482 --> 01:47:03,582
a location closer to them,
they'd be regulars, right?

2878
01:47:03,584 --> 01:47:05,284
Boom. Check it
out right here.

2879
01:47:05,286 --> 01:47:07,686
I found a great commercial spot
right on Los Gatos Boulevard.

2880
01:47:07,688 --> 01:47:09,388
Just hit the market.
- That's 0.3 miles away

2881
01:47:09,390 --> 01:47:10,756
from the nearest
farmers' market.

2882
01:47:10,758 --> 01:47:12,658
You can smell them tomatoes
from your front door.

2883
01:47:12,660 --> 01:47:13,726
Farm to table.

2884
01:47:13,728 --> 01:47:15,161
F to T, baby!
- Baby.

2885
01:47:15,163 --> 01:47:16,228
Come on.
- F to T!

2886
01:47:16,230 --> 01:47:18,164
F to T is exactly
right, Gomer Lyle!

2887
01:47:18,166 --> 01:47:19,999
We're not asking you
to abandon the artistry.

2888
01:47:20,001 --> 01:47:22,201
We're just telling you
expand the reach a little bit.

2889
01:47:22,203 --> 01:47:23,769
But look-it, Sal,
at the end of the day,

2890
01:47:23,771 --> 01:47:25,471
the kids, they got
their computers,

2891
01:47:25,473 --> 01:47:26,906
they got their information.

2892
01:47:26,908 --> 01:47:28,140
It's all accurate.

2893
01:47:28,142 --> 01:47:30,342
I get it, and I
know you do, too.

2894
01:47:30,344 --> 01:47:32,144
I tell you, Sal,

2895
01:47:32,146 --> 01:47:34,346
I can't blame you
for being a little afraid.

2896
01:47:34,348 --> 01:47:37,116
Hell, we were scared
for a long time out there,

2897
01:47:37,118 --> 01:47:38,784
grinding it out
with our heads down.

2898
01:47:38,786 --> 01:47:40,186
And Lord knows I've fallen

2899
01:47:40,188 --> 01:47:42,388
on my ass more than
a time or two.

2900
01:47:42,390 --> 01:47:44,757
But I promise you something.

2901
01:47:44,759 --> 01:47:46,258
You lift your head up...

2902
01:47:47,428 --> 01:47:49,462
and take a breath,

2903
01:47:49,464 --> 01:47:51,630
there's a lot of great
possibilities out there.

2904
01:47:51,632 --> 01:47:53,299
New customers,

2905
01:47:53,301 --> 01:47:57,002
new franchise... and that's just
the tip of the iceberg, Sal.

2906
01:47:57,004 --> 01:47:59,438
It's all waiting
at the click of a button.

2907
01:48:01,308 --> 01:48:03,309
Everybody's searching
for something, Sal.

2908
01:48:03,311 --> 01:48:04,777
They're searching for you.

2909
01:48:04,779 --> 01:48:08,013
We just want to help them
find you.

2910
01:48:14,655 --> 01:48:16,755
TGIF, Nooglers!

2911
01:48:17,758 --> 01:48:18,791
All right!

2912
01:48:20,161 --> 01:48:21,660
Easy, easy.

2913
01:48:21,662 --> 01:48:24,063
It's okay, it's okay.

2914
01:48:24,065 --> 01:48:26,332
Now, today marks not only
the end of the week,

2915
01:48:26,334 --> 01:48:28,567
but the end of
the summer's internships.

2916
01:48:28,569 --> 01:48:29,935
- I know.

2917
01:48:29,937 --> 01:48:32,538
As you can see
through these images behind me,

2918
01:48:32,540 --> 01:48:34,306
it's been quite a journey.

2919
01:48:34,308 --> 01:48:35,674
Lot of memories,

2920
01:48:35,676 --> 01:48:36,942
lot of bonds were made.

2921
01:48:36,944 --> 01:48:38,143
Kind of reminds me
of the first time

2922
01:48:38,145 --> 01:48:39,745
I owned a personal...
All right.

2923
01:48:39,747 --> 01:48:45,417
Today, we reveal the intern team
that will be awarded jobs here.

2924
01:48:45,419 --> 01:48:47,219
Sadly, one team

2925
01:48:47,221 --> 01:48:49,121
has not returned
from their final challenge,

2926
01:48:49,123 --> 01:48:50,923
so, therefore, I'm forced
to calculate the results

2927
01:48:50,925 --> 01:48:53,225
with their score

2928
01:48:53,227 --> 01:48:56,462
as an incomplete.

2929
01:49:00,667 --> 01:49:02,401
We have a victor.

2930
01:49:04,305 --> 01:49:05,305
Congratulations...

2931
01:49:14,081 --> 01:49:16,515
No way!

2932
01:49:16,517 --> 01:49:17,883
What's that?

2933
01:49:23,591 --> 01:49:24,623
What's going on?

2934
01:49:31,699 --> 01:49:33,966
Okay, calm down. Come on.

2935
01:49:54,355 --> 01:49:57,756
Yes, yes, yes, yes! Yes!

2936
01:50:08,636 --> 01:50:11,103
Come on!

2937
01:50:15,109 --> 01:50:17,843
Extra toppings
on this one, boss.

2938
01:50:17,845 --> 01:50:19,511
I see that.

2939
01:50:25,620 --> 01:50:26,986
Yeah!

2940
01:50:28,122 --> 01:50:29,922
That's enough!

2941
01:50:29,924 --> 01:50:31,991
That's enough!

2942
01:50:34,761 --> 01:50:35,928
Yes, lovely theatrics,

2943
01:50:35,930 --> 01:50:37,062
but the jig is up.

2944
01:50:37,064 --> 01:50:38,230
It's too late.

2945
01:50:38,232 --> 01:50:39,798
Rules are rules, right, Chetty?

2946
01:50:39,800 --> 01:50:41,667
Yes. Rules are rules.

2947
01:50:43,069 --> 01:50:45,371
And the rules state
that every team has the right

2948
01:50:45,373 --> 01:50:48,207
until the announcement is made
to turn in their sales.

2949
01:50:48,209 --> 01:50:50,809
So, in spite of
STUART: Yes!

2950
01:50:50,811 --> 01:50:53,045
Your lack of punctuality,
which is astounding,

2951
01:50:53,047 --> 01:50:55,347
I have no choice...

2952
01:50:55,349 --> 01:50:59,585
but to accept this submission
and to recalculate.

2953
01:50:59,587 --> 01:51:00,953
Go ahead.

2954
01:51:00,955 --> 01:51:02,521
Recalculate.

2955
01:51:02,523 --> 01:51:04,857
One sale to a small
family pizza joint's

2956
01:51:04,859 --> 01:51:06,258
not gonna make
a difference anyway.

2957
01:51:06,260 --> 01:51:09,895
It does seem that Mr. Hawtrey
is correct once again.

2958
01:51:09,897 --> 01:51:11,030
Boom.

2959
01:51:11,032 --> 01:51:13,265
Oh.
- The sales
from one shop

2960
01:51:13,267 --> 01:51:17,002
on the last challenge are not
enough to put you in the lead.

2961
01:51:17,004 --> 01:51:18,437
I'm sorry, bud.

2962
01:51:20,006 --> 01:51:22,741
But...

2963
01:51:22,743 --> 01:51:25,844
this is not one shop.

2964
01:51:25,846 --> 01:51:27,112
You see,

2965
01:51:27,114 --> 01:51:30,382
this... is
a blossoming franchise

2966
01:51:30,384 --> 01:51:33,886
with endless possibilities,
thanks to you.

2967
01:51:33,888 --> 01:51:35,721
And what you have done as a team

2968
01:51:35,723 --> 01:51:38,223
is connect to people

2969
01:51:38,225 --> 01:51:40,826
and connect those people
to information.

2970
01:51:40,828 --> 01:51:43,762
Which is what we do.

2971
01:51:43,764 --> 01:51:45,030
And more than that,

2972
01:51:45,032 --> 01:51:46,832
you had the courage to dream.

2973
01:51:46,834 --> 01:51:49,268
In spite of your obvious

2974
01:51:49,270 --> 01:51:52,738
and astonishing limitations,

2975
01:51:52,740 --> 01:51:54,473
you never gave up on that dream.

2976
01:51:54,475 --> 01:51:55,474
No.

2977
01:51:55,476 --> 01:51:57,309
So...

2978
01:51:57,311 --> 01:51:58,410
gentlemen...

2979
01:51:59,379 --> 01:52:00,546
and lady...

2980
01:52:00,548 --> 01:52:02,414
Whoa, whoa, whoa,
whoa, whoa. Hold on.

2981
01:52:02,416 --> 01:52:05,684
Chetty, no offense,
you're a glorified babysitter.

2982
01:52:05,686 --> 01:52:09,021
Let's get somebody down here
who actually means something.

2983
01:52:09,023 --> 01:52:10,889
I'm right here.

2984
01:52:10,891 --> 01:52:12,024
Terrific.

2985
01:52:14,862 --> 01:52:17,996
Graham, please meet
Mr. Anderson.

2986
01:52:17,998 --> 01:52:19,565
You know this guy?

2987
01:52:19,567 --> 01:52:21,100
I should think I do.

2988
01:52:21,102 --> 01:52:23,268
Andrew here is
the head of Search...

2989
01:52:23,270 --> 01:52:26,171
a rather important position
here at Google.

2990
01:52:26,173 --> 01:52:28,040
Honest, it's an honor.

2991
01:52:28,042 --> 01:52:29,174
Look at you, Headphones.

2992
01:52:29,176 --> 01:52:30,743
A little mystery
behind the boy.

2993
01:52:30,745 --> 01:52:32,277
What? How-how do you know him?

2994
01:52:32,279 --> 01:52:34,346
We were encouraged to reach out
to experienced Googlers.

2995
01:52:34,348 --> 01:52:36,215
Pretty simple.
Not a big mystery.

2996
01:52:36,217 --> 01:52:40,319
To reach out to other Googlers,
not just kiss their asses.

2997
01:52:40,321 --> 01:52:42,788
You see, these interns are

2998
01:52:42,790 --> 01:52:46,792
smart, collaborative, pretty...

2999
01:52:46,794 --> 01:52:48,060
Thank you.

3000
01:52:48,062 --> 01:52:49,928
And just weird enough

3001
01:52:49,930 --> 01:52:51,930
to make them interesting.

3002
01:52:51,932 --> 01:52:55,934
Also, they came together
as a team

3003
01:52:55,936 --> 01:52:58,003
to do something here.

3004
01:52:58,005 --> 01:53:01,473
Their Googliness
is truly off the charts.

3005
01:53:01,475 --> 01:53:03,709
Oh, my God, can you stop
with the "Googliness"?

3006
01:53:03,711 --> 01:53:05,511
Like, what does that even mean?

3007
01:53:05,513 --> 01:53:08,347
The fact that you don't know
what it means

3008
01:53:08,349 --> 01:53:10,382
is why you will never work here.

3009
01:53:12,252 --> 01:53:16,221
Also, you just
made me use a bunch of words

3010
01:53:16,223 --> 01:53:18,090
in front of a ton of people.

3011
01:53:18,092 --> 01:53:19,358
Look at me.

3012
01:53:19,360 --> 01:53:20,592
You're a real dick
for doing that.

3013
01:53:20,594 --> 01:53:21,827
Look at me again.

3014
01:53:21,829 --> 01:53:24,763
And I know your accent
is bullshit.

3015
01:53:24,765 --> 01:53:26,598
What?

3016
01:53:27,700 --> 01:53:30,235
So...

3017
01:53:33,006 --> 01:53:35,340
welcome to Google.

3018
01:53:38,845 --> 01:53:40,479
Yes! Yes!

3019
01:53:42,882 --> 01:53:44,683
Yes!

3020
01:53:51,325 --> 01:53:52,257
Boom!

3021
01:53:52,259 --> 01:53:55,861
I have a job!
I have a job!

3022
01:53:55,863 --> 01:53:57,396
Hey, why are you getting up?

3023
01:53:57,398 --> 01:54:00,299
I should be the winner.
I should be the winner!

3024
01:54:00,301 --> 01:54:01,900
Well, I hope you're all happy.

3025
01:54:01,902 --> 01:54:03,502
What were you thinking?

3026
01:54:03,504 --> 01:54:06,038
Maybe if I had a team of equals
who contributed once in a while,

3027
01:54:06,040 --> 01:54:07,606
this never would have happened.

3028
01:54:07,608 --> 01:54:09,942
What about you? What do you
have to say for yourself, eh?

3029
01:54:09,944 --> 01:54:11,276
Huh?

3030
01:54:11,278 --> 01:54:13,178
I think it's time
to fake an injury.

3031
01:54:13,180 --> 01:54:15,180
What are you talking about,
you fat...

3032
01:54:16,417 --> 01:54:17,816
Man down!

3033
01:54:19,419 --> 01:54:22,154
Chetty, I appreciate
what you said back there.

3034
01:54:22,156 --> 01:54:24,556
I know you had us figured wrong
from the beginning.

3035
01:54:24,558 --> 01:54:26,658
He voted for you
from the beginning.

3036
01:54:26,660 --> 01:54:27,926
What?

3037
01:54:27,928 --> 01:54:30,696
Mr. Chetty was the deciding vote
on the intern committee.

3038
01:54:30,698 --> 01:54:31,964
I didn't have a fancy education

3039
01:54:31,966 --> 01:54:33,298
like most of the people here.

3040
01:54:33,300 --> 01:54:36,368
I had to work hard
to get to where I am.

3041
01:54:36,370 --> 01:54:37,836
And I recognized
a similar tenacity

3042
01:54:37,838 --> 01:54:40,472
in you two gentlemen,
so I took a chance on you.

3043
01:54:40,474 --> 01:54:44,943
You did test my faith
a few times.

3044
01:54:44,945 --> 01:54:46,345
Basically, the entire time.

3045
01:54:46,347 --> 01:54:49,181
But I'm glad you
proved me right.

3046
01:54:49,183 --> 01:54:52,351
Chetty, thanks
for betting on us.

3047
01:54:54,020 --> 01:54:56,355
Good to see you.

3048
01:54:56,357 --> 01:54:57,456
Hey.

3049
01:54:57,458 --> 01:54:59,057
So it looks like
you're gonna be seeing

3050
01:54:59,059 --> 01:55:00,859
a lot more of me around here.

3051
01:55:00,861 --> 01:55:02,060
So it does.

3052
01:55:02,062 --> 01:55:03,128
Congratulations.

3053
01:55:03,130 --> 01:55:04,796
Thank you.

3054
01:55:04,798 --> 01:55:06,031
Look, the other night...

3055
01:55:06,033 --> 01:55:07,866
It was fun.

3056
01:55:07,868 --> 01:55:08,901
Yeah, it was fun.

3057
01:55:08,903 --> 01:55:09,902
Right?

3058
01:55:09,904 --> 01:55:12,571
Yeah.

3059
01:55:14,507 --> 01:55:16,441
No regrets.

3060
01:55:16,443 --> 01:55:18,777
No.

3061
01:55:30,357 --> 01:55:33,325
All right, let's get
to that warm, fuzzy part.

3062
01:55:33,327 --> 01:55:35,794
Um, that's not going to happen.

3063
01:55:35,796 --> 01:55:37,629
- God, I love him even more.

3064
01:55:37,631 --> 01:55:39,831
He leaves it cold like that.
You know what I mean?

3065
01:55:39,833 --> 01:55:41,300
You keep playing hard to get,

3066
01:55:41,302 --> 01:55:43,201
you're gonna find yourself
all alone.

3067
01:55:43,203 --> 01:55:44,536
We're not gonna
have a beer together.

3068
01:55:44,538 --> 01:55:46,271
We're gonna have
about five of them.

3069
01:55:46,273 --> 01:55:47,272
We're equals now,
my friend.
- No, we're not.

3070
01:55:47,274 --> 01:55:48,573
Yes, we are.

3071
01:55:48,575 --> 01:55:50,042
No, we're not.
- Let's go pick out

3072
01:55:50,044 --> 01:55:51,810
some other interns and shape
some diamonds in the rough.

3073
01:55:51,812 --> 01:55:53,478
Please stop following me.
Please stop talking to me.

3074
01:55:53,480 --> 01:55:54,646
We're gonna get drunk.

3075
01:56:02,488 --> 01:56:04,256
Have a great senior year, guys.

3076
01:56:04,258 --> 01:56:05,791
We'll keep your desk chairs
warm for you.

3077
01:56:05,793 --> 01:56:06,858
Team Lyle.

3078
01:56:06,860 --> 01:56:08,093
Team Lyle!

3079
01:56:08,095 --> 01:56:09,895
That's the spirit.

3080
01:56:09,897 --> 01:56:12,397
Yo-Yo! Come. Now.

3081
01:56:12,399 --> 01:56:13,765
Mom, I need a minute.

3082
01:56:13,767 --> 01:56:15,567
Yo-Yo, I not go. We need to...
- Mom.

3083
01:56:15,569 --> 01:56:17,102
I'm saying good-bye
to my friends.

3084
01:56:17,104 --> 01:56:20,005
I'm taking a minute.

3085
01:56:20,007 --> 01:56:22,441
Okay?

3086
01:56:27,680 --> 01:56:29,381
Look who grew
an eyebrow, Yo-Yo!

3087
01:56:29,383 --> 01:56:31,116
Come on!

3088
01:56:31,118 --> 01:56:33,018
All right, you riffraff,
get out of here.

3089
01:56:33,020 --> 01:56:34,252
See you down the road.
- See you guys.

3090
01:56:34,254 --> 01:56:35,787
See you, bud.
- Thank you, Captain.

3091
01:56:35,789 --> 01:56:38,290
Thank you, Big B.

3092
01:56:38,292 --> 01:56:39,658
Bye, guys.

3093
01:56:39,660 --> 01:56:41,540
My Khaleesi.
- My sun and stars.

3094
01:56:42,730 --> 01:56:45,297
What do you say? You want
to go get weird in a nap pod?

3095
01:56:45,299 --> 01:56:47,032
So, um, don't be a stranger.

3096
01:56:47,034 --> 01:56:48,900
Shoot me a text sometime.

3097
01:56:48,902 --> 01:56:50,035
Forget that.

3098
01:56:50,037 --> 01:56:52,304
I'm gonna come
see you in person.

3099
01:56:53,774 --> 01:56:55,574
Yeah, I'd like that.

3100
01:56:55,576 --> 01:56:56,608
Hey, guys, I grew
a pair of balls.

3101
01:56:56,610 --> 01:56:58,443
Did you see them?
- You did!

3102
01:56:58,445 --> 01:57:00,112
You grew a big pair
of balls, my man.
- It was amazing.

3103
01:57:00,114 --> 01:57:01,413
They're touching
my ankles.
- Okay.

3104
01:57:01,415 --> 01:57:03,295
Well, that...
we don't need that.

3105
01:57:04,550 --> 01:57:05,684
Hey, congratulations, guys.

3106
01:57:05,686 --> 01:57:07,619
Thank you, boss.
- Thank you, boss.

3107
01:57:07,621 --> 01:57:09,855
You know, I did get you
a little something.

3108
01:57:09,857 --> 01:57:10,655
Aw.

3109
01:57:10,657 --> 01:57:12,190
Not to get too sentimental...

3110
01:57:12,192 --> 01:57:14,092
Whoa! Whoa!

3111
01:57:14,094 --> 01:57:15,927
- Look at this high roller.

3112
01:57:15,929 --> 01:57:17,329
Busting out the Pappy on me.

3113
01:57:17,331 --> 01:57:18,797
I figured we earned a swig.

3114
01:57:18,799 --> 01:57:20,198
Mm-hmm.

3115
01:57:20,200 --> 01:57:21,466
Hell of a summer, bud.

3116
01:57:21,468 --> 01:57:23,802
Hell of a summer.

3117
01:58:25,199 --> 01:58:26,198
British.

3118
01:58:26,200 --> 01:58:27,240
Listen, Professor...

3119
01:59:01,468 --> 01:59:02,634
Buddy, they can't
see us, okay?
- I understand that,

3120
01:59:02,636 --> 01:59:04,136
but here we go.
- Go cheek to cheek.

3121
01:59:04,138 --> 01:59:05,670
Just go like I tell you.
- Okay, don't interrupt me.

3122
01:59:05,672 --> 01:59:07,038
Put your cheek next to mine.
- Yes.

3123
01:59:07,040 --> 01:59:08,740
Yeah, I get it. You got us?
- Hi, my name is Billy.

3124
01:59:08,742 --> 01:59:09,941
Yeah, Nick Campbell.
- Oh, good.

3125
01:59:09,943 --> 01:59:10,976
You can hear me.

3126
01:59:45,211 --> 01:59:47,345
Guys, hi.

3127
01:59:47,347 --> 01:59:49,447
Hey.
So, what do you think?

3128
01:59:49,449 --> 01:59:52,017
Cosplay.
What can you say?
- I knew you'd love it.

3129
01:59:52,019 --> 01:59:53,285
Stuart totally
loves it, too, now.

3130
01:59:53,287 --> 01:59:55,120
- You guys have fun.
- Okay, great.

3131
01:59:55,122 --> 01:59:57,088
Don't worry about us.
We're having a great time.

3132
01:59:57,090 --> 01:59:58,190
Don't worry about us.
We're having fun.

3133
01:59:58,192 --> 02:00:00,492
Uh-oh. Here we go.
- Oh, hit it.

3134
02:00:00,494 --> 02:00:02,727
Classic <i>Star Wars</i> villain.
- Looking on with Boba Fett.
We're just observers.

3135
02:00:02,729 --> 02:00:04,896
We're just here
to observe.
- It's me!

3136
02:00:04,898 --> 02:00:06,698
- Kevin.
- What the shit?
- Shit.

3137
02:00:06,700 --> 02:00:08,567
Guys. Yeah.
- Kevin!

3138
02:00:08,569 --> 02:00:09,968
What the hell
are you doing here?

3139
02:00:09,970 --> 02:00:12,637
Cosby. It's your
first time at Cosby?

3140
02:00:12,639 --> 02:00:14,673
Excuse me?
- It's my new journey.

3141
02:00:14,675 --> 02:00:15,840
And I have you to thank.

3142
02:00:15,842 --> 02:00:17,576
You really pointed
some things out.

3143
02:00:17,578 --> 02:00:18,944
I was being a jerk to people.

3144
02:00:18,946 --> 02:00:20,412
'Cause I was hurting inside.

3145
02:00:20,414 --> 02:00:22,314
Well, it takes a big man
to admit he's wrong, Kevin.

3146
02:00:22,316 --> 02:00:24,816
Good for you.
- Anyway, I'm going to
dive back into the fun.

3147
02:00:24,818 --> 02:00:26,718
Ooh, check out
this hot little number.

3148
02:00:26,720 --> 02:00:30,121
I don't know if it's a...
Ewok or a space squirrel.

3149
02:00:30,123 --> 02:00:32,257
I can't wait to rip into that.

3150
02:00:32,259 --> 02:00:33,658
How do you know
who's underneath the mask?

3151
02:00:33,660 --> 02:00:35,260
Look, I don't know what's
underneath the hood,

3152
02:00:35,262 --> 02:00:36,828
and I don't give a shit.

3153
02:00:36,830 --> 02:00:38,196
I'm insatiable.

3154
02:00:38,198 --> 02:00:40,365
Now, if you excuse me,
old Boba Fett's

3155
02:00:40,367 --> 02:00:43,034
going to give this squirrel
a couple nuts to hide.

3156
02:00:43,036 --> 02:00:44,970
You know Boba Fett...
he always fucked

3157
02:00:44,972 --> 02:00:47,038
the space squirrel
at the end of the movie.

3158
02:00:47,040 --> 02:00:48,974
Audience knew it was coming.

3159
02:00:48,976 --> 02:00:50,475
Audience wanted it.

3160
02:00:50,477 --> 02:00:51,943
Audience got it.