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Provided by explosiveskull
https://twitter.com/kaboomskull
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Stop
desecrating God's holy word!
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One, two, three,
four. God is what we're fighting for.
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- This is not free speech.
- Five, six, seven, eight.
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- The Bible is what makes us great.
- Boycott this movie.
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Make Hollywood stop irreverent filmmaking.
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God is love!
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I mean, I've never seen
a line going down the block
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in front of one
of our films before.
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It's a picket line, Uncle Max.
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Well, you know, maybe the film
is just ahead of its time.
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You never know, Walter. I mean, when Igor
Stravinsky's Rite of Spring first performed
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at the Théâtre
des Champs-Élysées in Paris,
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people were so overwhelmed
by its unique atonal qualities
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that a fistfight erupted
amongst the patrons.
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What does that
have to do with us?
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Well, I'm just saying.
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"The movie's excruciatingly
bad taste can only be matched
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by the ineptitude
of its execution.
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Truly the only good thing
about this film is that
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after 90 minutes, it's over."
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I thought you said
we got a good review.
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That is a good review.
They liked the end.
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Blasphemy!
You're the devil. The devil!
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- Stop your exploitation.
- Five, six, seven, eight.
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The Bible is what
makes us great.
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Uncle Max, I've got
to ask you something.
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We've been at this
a long time.
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- So?
- I don't know. Do you think maybe we should...
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quit?
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- I'm gonna pretend I didn't hear that, Walter.
- Well, I...
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Quit? Are you... Are you
out of your fucking mind?
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Quit, Walter?
Bite your tongue.
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We don't quit.
We're Miracle Motion Pictures.
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What's our motto? What's our motto?
If it's good, it's...
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- A miracle.
- A miracle. Exactly.
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And why do we call ourselves
Miracle Motion Pictures?
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Because miracles are out there.
They exist. They happen every day.
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Not to us, but they're real.
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All we have to do is keep our
eyes open and our hearts free,
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so that when our miracle
presents itself,
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we're there to recognize it
and seize it accordingly.
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- Come on.
- All right.
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Let's go find our miracle.
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Great. Can you help me
with the check?
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Sure.
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One, two, three, four.
God is what we're fighting for.
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Boycott movies made
by Miracle Motion Pictures.
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They are not miracles.
They are blasphemy.
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Avon Used Car.
Scene one. Take one.
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Hi. I'm Duke Mon...
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Sorry. We'll go again.
Keep it rolling.
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- It's fine. We're shooting on videotape.
- What?
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It's the latest thing. We're always
rolling. So ready whenever you are, Duke.
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Aah!
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Shit.
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Hey, Reggie.
Glad you're here.
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You know, at first, I thought
I would put a fucking bomb in your car
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like that Mexican kid did in
Orson Welles' Touch of Evil.
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That kid was shifty.
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Then I thought, "No. No.
What I'll do is I'll stab him to death
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like Tony Perkins did
to Janet Leigh in Psycho."
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Now that motherfucker
really loved his mama.
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Then I thought, "No, no, no,
no, no. You know what I'll do?
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I'll push his ass
down the stairs
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like Richard Widmark did to
that old bat in Kiss of Death."
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Remember Tommy Udo?
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I didn't see that one.
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Well, did you ever
consider letting me go,
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like Claude Rains did to John
Garfield in They Made Me a Criminal?
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Shit. I hated that movie.
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Yeah, well,
that's bad luck for you.
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I liked that movie.
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Unfortunately for you, Max,
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this is one time when life
will not imitate art.
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All right, Reggie.
Reggie, listen.
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I... I told you,
this is the movie business
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and that there was always a
chance that we could take a loss.
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- I told you that.
- A loss?
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I just went by the theater.
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You haven't sold
one goddamn ticket.
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That's got to be some
sort of fucking record.
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But that's not my fault.
I didn't do anything.
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Those goddamn Catholics,
they all went crazy.
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They won't let people
into the theaters.
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But this is gonna blow over.
Wait and see.
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And all this press
is great for us.
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You can't buy
this kind of publicity.
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Listen to me, Max.
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This piece of shit
cost me $350,000.
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I want my money back.
All of it.
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Yeah, but I don't have your money.
It's up on the screen.
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"Sure hit."
That's what you said.
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- I said that?
- Yeah.
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- I said that?
- Guaranteed hit.
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We all heard you
say that bullshit.
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Well, Reggie, come on.
I'm a producer.
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You can't always believe every word
I say when I'm trying to raise money.
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I mean, I get carried away.
That's normal.
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Just give me time. Give me time
and I'll have your money.
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I'll have all your money.
I promise.
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- You're lying.
- I swear to you I'm not lying.
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I'm not... Well, I'm...
Okay, I'm lying a little bit.
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But hear me out.
I'm a hustler. I'm a producer.
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That's what I do.
And I will... I promise you,
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I will look under every rock,
every nook, every cranny.
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I will leave no stone unturned,
I will leave no resource untapped,
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until I have your money
in full, I promise you.
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- With vig.
- Yeah, with vig. With vig, of course.
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- All right. You got 72 hours.
- Seventy-two hours.
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After that,
I choke you to death.
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Like Tony Curtis
in The Boston Strangler?
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- You bet.
- Okay.
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I like that movie.
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But he's so drunk, he can't even stand
up, right? So they throw me out there.
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Thank God I'm a master
of improvisation, you know?
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Then I thought to myself,
"Who gives a shit?
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The French don't speak English."
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Security. Security.
Who the fuck let this guy in here?
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- Funny.
- Max Barber.
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Jimmy Moore.
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I prefer James.
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Well, I remember you
when you were just a kid.
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That was a long time ago, Max.
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Hmm. Things have changed.
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Mm-hmm. Yeah.
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Can we go somewhere
private to talk?
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Sure thing.
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So let me guess.
You need money?
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Is it that obvious?
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No. I can't tell
from your eyes.
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I can't tell
from your posture.
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You've always concealed
your motives well.
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That's one of the many things I
learned from working with you, Max.
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Never let them know what's really
going on inside of you. Sit down.
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It's all over the street,
Max.
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You owe $350,000 to Reggie
Fontaine for your latest opus.
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Look, Jimmy...
uh, I mean James.
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It's all short-term,
believe me.
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Huh? Oh. What, you got a whole string
of hits you're putting together?
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All right. Very funny.
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I'm just messing with you.
I'm just messing with you, Max.
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I'm happy to give it to you,
for old times' sake.
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Thank you.
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I'm just gonna need
one thing in return.
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Terry Miller's script,
Paradise. I want it.
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I... No. I... uh, no, Jimmy.
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- No, no, no.
- It's the best script I've ever read.
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It's a guaranteed Best Picture
for me, and I want it.
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I... I... I can't. I can't.
Anything but that.
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- You can't get it made, Max.
- Oh, come on.
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It'll cost $10 million to make
that picture the right way.
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I can get that kind
of money in a heartbeat.
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You couldn't put that kind of money
together in a dozen lifetimes.
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Why are you being
so goddamn stubborn?
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'Cause that script is my baby.
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It's what keeps me going,
Jimmy. I can't do it.
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Wait, you forget
who brought it to you?
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Yeah. You did. So what?
And look who put all the work into it.
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Look who had to fuck his widow to
get her to hand over the rights.
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You did? No, I did.
You know what courage that took?
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You had a chance to make it years
ago when you were almost somebody.
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Yeah. You wanted to make it with
Frank Pierce, for Christ's sake.
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- Frank Pierce is a movie star!
- Frank Pierce is a bum. He's wrong for the part.
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He's dead wrong.
He'd have ruined it. Come on.
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At least, it would
have been something to ruin.
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But I, uh...
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$350,000, Max.
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I'll write you
the check right now.
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I get that script,
once and for all,
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and you avoid a shallow grave.
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I can't do it. I can't do it.
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$500,000, Max.
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Absolutely not. I can't.
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Seven-fifty.
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Uh, I can't. I can't.
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All right.
A million dollars, Max.
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A million?
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No, no, no, no.
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I... I can't. I can't.
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No, no, no, no.
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No fucking way am I ever gonna
let you have that script.
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00:11:04,107 --> 00:11:06,706
Every scene is perfect.
Every word is a gem.
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You're beneath that script. You don't deserve
it. I'm never gonna let you have it.
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00:11:09,572 --> 00:11:11,873
I'm never gonna let you have it.
You're just gonna ruin it.
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00:11:11,907 --> 00:11:13,839
You're gonna ruin it,
like with Frank Pierce, you...
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- You know what? Fine. Fine.
- You can't just give me the money?
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Gotta put me through
this fucking humiliation.
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00:11:18,273 --> 00:11:21,107
I'll just make it with Walter once
you're dead. Same results and money.
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00:11:21,139 --> 00:11:24,706
I'll will that script to Ed Wood before I let
you get your greasy fucking hands on it.
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00:11:24,740 --> 00:11:27,673
- Fuck you.
- Yeah. Say hi to Reggie for me, you stubborn son of a bitch.
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00:11:27,705 --> 00:11:30,539
- You say hello.
- You know what you make? You make fucking garbage...
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00:11:30,572 --> 00:11:32,706
...and I win Oscars.
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00:12:06,939 --> 00:12:08,207
- Morning.
- Good morning.
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00:12:11,140 --> 00:12:14,974
- What's this?
- It's a present from Jimmy Moore but it's an odd one.
196
00:12:15,007 --> 00:12:16,840
What does that card mean?
Somebody die?
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00:12:16,872 --> 00:12:20,106
- No idea.
- He also sent this.
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00:12:21,706 --> 00:12:24,640
Why the hell would he send you
a shovel and a bag of lye?
199
00:12:25,939 --> 00:12:27,874
It's an inside joke
between the two of us.
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You want to let me in on it?
201
00:12:30,972 --> 00:12:34,074
Not really. Any messages?
202
00:12:34,107 --> 00:12:36,639
Uh, yeah. Reggie Fontaine.
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00:12:36,673 --> 00:12:39,673
He just said, "48 hours."
204
00:12:39,705 --> 00:12:41,673
- What the hell does that mean?
- I don't know.
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00:12:41,706 --> 00:12:44,207
You don't know much
this morning, do you?
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00:12:46,940 --> 00:12:50,707
Walter. You're my nephew.
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00:12:52,171 --> 00:12:54,873
If anything, God forbid,
would happen to me,
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00:12:54,906 --> 00:12:56,506
all this would be yours.
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00:12:57,672 --> 00:13:00,841
So I suppose you have the right
to know what's going on.
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00:13:02,041 --> 00:13:06,540
We both know that Jimmy Moore
has wanted Paradise for forever.
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00:13:06,572 --> 00:13:08,940
- Yeah.
- And, well, last night...
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00:13:09,740 --> 00:13:11,707
he made me an offer
to buy the script.
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00:13:11,739 --> 00:13:13,074
How much?
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00:13:13,107 --> 00:13:15,074
- It was a lot.
- How much is a lot?
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00:13:16,205 --> 00:13:19,773
- A million dollars.
- Oh!
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00:13:19,806 --> 00:13:21,773
A million dollars.
What did you say?
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00:13:21,806 --> 00:13:24,206
- What do you think I said?
- I would imagine you said yes.
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00:13:24,239 --> 00:13:27,773
- I said no.
- What? Are you kid... It's a million dollars!
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00:13:27,805 --> 00:13:30,606
Walter, what are we
if we don't have our dreams?
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00:13:30,639 --> 00:13:31,973
Rich.
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00:13:35,840 --> 00:13:37,506
Walter, no, no.
222
00:13:37,540 --> 00:13:41,138
Walter, this script, Paradise,
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00:13:41,171 --> 00:13:44,138
is one of the greatest scripts
ever written.
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00:13:44,172 --> 00:13:48,539
We'd win Academy Awards. Me and you
up there on the stage, taking bows.
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00:13:48,572 --> 00:13:52,139
Up at the podium, thanking each other.
Thanking each other!
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00:13:52,172 --> 00:13:55,139
But a millions dollars. I mean...
I mean, with a million dollars,
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00:13:55,171 --> 00:13:57,839
we'd not only be out of hock,
we'd be living the good life.
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00:13:57,872 --> 00:14:00,172
With a million dollars, we could
make a dozen more movies.
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00:14:00,205 --> 00:14:02,539
I can't stand the thought
of him making this film.
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00:14:02,572 --> 00:14:04,940
After all the fucking work I
did, why should he be doing this?
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00:14:04,973 --> 00:14:09,007
Why should he be taking bows, receiving
accolades when I did all the fucking work?
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00:14:09,039 --> 00:14:10,939
It was me. Me. Me.
233
00:14:10,973 --> 00:14:13,172
Don't you get that? Me.
234
00:14:13,206 --> 00:14:15,540
I'm not an idiot.
I know you're in trouble.
235
00:14:15,573 --> 00:14:17,639
- I'm in trouble? What are you talking about?
- Come on.
236
00:14:17,673 --> 00:14:20,806
The flowers and the shovel and the
lye and someone saying, "48 hours."
237
00:14:20,839 --> 00:14:23,506
- Come on. I'm not an idiot.
- What exactly are you getting at?
238
00:14:23,540 --> 00:14:25,740
I think you haven't painted
the most accurate portrait
239
00:14:25,772 --> 00:14:27,672
of our investor,
Mr. Fontaine.
240
00:14:27,706 --> 00:14:31,106
You know what?
Walter, sometimes you stun me
241
00:14:31,139 --> 00:14:33,573
with your ability to connect
the dots. That's amazing.
242
00:14:33,605 --> 00:14:35,539
- Oh, don't patronize me.
- I'm not patronizing you.
243
00:14:35,573 --> 00:14:37,172
- Yes. You're being very patronizing.
- I'm not...
244
00:14:37,206 --> 00:14:39,205
- Yes, you are.
- I'm not patronizing you.
245
00:14:39,238 --> 00:14:41,673
You're talking down to me like
I'm your nephew. Yes, you are.
246
00:14:41,706 --> 00:14:44,540
All right. All right. Yes.
All right, we're in trouble.
247
00:14:44,573 --> 00:14:46,907
We've been in trouble before.
We're always in trouble.
248
00:14:46,940 --> 00:14:48,840
We always find
a way out, Walter.
249
00:14:48,872 --> 00:14:51,072
That's what we do.
We're Miracle Motion Pictures.
250
00:14:51,105 --> 00:14:53,272
- What's our motto?
- Stop with the motto.
251
00:14:53,305 --> 00:14:56,239
- Okay. Look, you were talking about miracles yesterday.
- Yeah?
252
00:14:56,273 --> 00:14:59,973
How they're out there. All we have to do is
recognize them when they present themselves.
253
00:15:00,006 --> 00:15:01,939
I'll tell you
what a miracle is.
254
00:15:01,973 --> 00:15:04,273
It's a miracle that Jimmy Moore
wants to cut you a check
255
00:15:04,305 --> 00:15:07,974
for a million dollars
over some stupid script.
256
00:15:08,007 --> 00:15:09,673
How could you say
"stupid script"?
257
00:15:09,706 --> 00:15:11,940
Don't you... How did you
say "stupid script"?
258
00:15:11,973 --> 00:15:14,606
You take that back right now, Walter.
You worked on this too.
259
00:15:14,640 --> 00:15:18,073
- Walter!
- For once in your life, please, be practical. Sell the script.
260
00:15:18,106 --> 00:15:22,673
Take the money. Let's... Look at this
place! Let's turn our lives around.
261
00:15:22,705 --> 00:15:26,006
Turn your life around
while you still got it, okay?
262
00:15:26,038 --> 00:15:28,138
Please.
It's the adult thing to do.
263
00:15:36,839 --> 00:15:39,473
So then we all agree?
A million two?
264
00:15:45,839 --> 00:15:46,939
Yeah. Yeah.
265
00:15:46,973 --> 00:15:48,740
Mm!
266
00:15:48,773 --> 00:15:51,807
I'm proud of you, Max.
It's the adult thing to do.
267
00:15:51,839 --> 00:15:53,639
That's exactly
what I said, Jimmy.
268
00:15:54,840 --> 00:15:57,039
James.
269
00:15:57,072 --> 00:16:01,106
And, um, I'll have the paperwork drawn
up and over to you by 6:00 tonight.
270
00:16:02,539 --> 00:16:05,540
And in the spirit
of being adult,
271
00:16:05,573 --> 00:16:08,139
here is a down payment
272
00:16:08,172 --> 00:16:13,105
of $350,000,
273
00:16:13,138 --> 00:16:18,673
so that you can take care
of your, uh, investor issues.
274
00:16:21,172 --> 00:16:23,106
Come on. Take it, Max.
275
00:16:23,138 --> 00:16:26,907
Again, it's
the adult thing to do.
276
00:16:45,540 --> 00:16:46,773
He's kidding, right?
277
00:16:46,805 --> 00:16:48,138
No. He's not kidding.
278
00:16:48,172 --> 00:16:50,507
You're not kidding, Max?
279
00:16:51,306 --> 00:16:53,939
Hey, hey, hey. Stop it. Hey.
280
00:16:53,971 --> 00:16:57,072
Hey, we're gonna find you
another great script.
281
00:16:57,872 --> 00:16:59,572
Shh, shh, shh...
282
00:16:59,606 --> 00:17:01,840
Hey, why don't you guys
come by the set, okay?
283
00:17:01,873 --> 00:17:04,873
It's the first day of shooting.
Frank Pierce is gonna be there.
284
00:17:04,907 --> 00:17:07,205
He's gonna perform
a terrific stunt.
285
00:17:07,239 --> 00:17:08,939
Frank Pierce is
my favorite actor.
286
00:17:08,972 --> 00:17:11,105
Oh. I'm gonna cast him
as the lead in Paradise.
287
00:17:11,139 --> 00:17:14,073
Ooh! That's exciting.
288
00:17:14,105 --> 00:17:15,938
- No.
- We love Frank Pierce.
289
00:17:15,972 --> 00:17:20,073
Let's go visit the set, huh?
See him do a stunt.
290
00:17:20,105 --> 00:17:22,739
- No. No.
- I would... I would love to meet Frank Pierce.
291
00:17:22,773 --> 00:17:24,139
- Hey.
- You're not kidding?
292
00:17:24,171 --> 00:17:26,072
- No. Let's go meet Frank Pierce.
- No.
293
00:17:26,106 --> 00:17:28,774
Frank, give me a second.
Let's get you strapped up, bud.
294
00:17:29,272 --> 00:17:31,639
Here you go, darling.
295
00:17:31,672 --> 00:17:35,172
Hey, did I tell you guys
I bought a new Oldsmobile 442?
296
00:17:35,205 --> 00:17:38,939
- Yeah?
- Yeah. It's got a Rocket 455 in it.
297
00:17:38,971 --> 00:17:41,839
Cops were chasing me
all over Mulholland last night.
298
00:17:41,873 --> 00:17:43,540
Couldn't catch me.
299
00:17:45,906 --> 00:17:50,006
- Wow! A real movie set.
- Come on. Act like you've been on a set before.
300
00:17:50,038 --> 00:17:52,672
- That's Frank Pierce. Frank Pierce is right there.
- Yeah. I see him.
301
00:17:52,706 --> 00:17:54,540
Certainly is.
You wanna go say hi?
302
00:17:54,572 --> 00:17:56,540
Well, you think I could?
I don't wanna bother him.
303
00:17:56,572 --> 00:17:58,807
It's no bother. I called ahead
and told him you were coming.
304
00:17:58,839 --> 00:18:01,172
And he said as soon as you got
here to just go right over to him.
305
00:18:01,206 --> 00:18:02,540
Okay. I'll be right back.
306
00:18:03,938 --> 00:18:05,839
You know Frank's wrong
for Paradise.
307
00:18:05,871 --> 00:18:09,739
He's a movie star, Max.
One of the biggest in the world.
308
00:18:09,773 --> 00:18:12,006
With him, the picture gets
an automatic green light.
309
00:18:12,038 --> 00:18:14,806
But he doesn't have the gravitas
to play the lead character.
310
00:18:14,840 --> 00:18:18,239
This is a story about dreams,
the stuff that lingers in men's souls.
311
00:18:18,272 --> 00:18:21,972
It's about a man who refuses to
conform, who goes on a quest.
312
00:18:22,005 --> 00:18:24,772
Excuse me, Mr. Pierce? I'm so sorry
to bother you. I'm Walter Creason.
313
00:18:24,806 --> 00:18:28,839
- James said I could say hi.
- Ew. Guys, can we lock it up? Where is security?
314
00:18:28,872 --> 00:18:30,938
- Oh, no. I'm...
- What's going on around here?
315
00:18:30,971 --> 00:18:33,872
I'm James Moore's associate...
friend... uh, acquaintance.
316
00:18:33,906 --> 00:18:37,740
Oh, that's right. Jimmy's friend, hey.
Yeah, yeah. Nice to meet you.
317
00:18:37,772 --> 00:18:40,838
Yeah, yeah, yeah, Max.
I know the goddamn story.
318
00:18:40,871 --> 00:18:43,039
But, Jimmy... James,
this is my letter to the world.
319
00:18:43,071 --> 00:18:44,807
How many more movies
can I make?
320
00:18:44,838 --> 00:18:47,006
You remember when
I was starting this project.
321
00:18:47,038 --> 00:18:50,573
Please, just consider.
We can't have someone like Frank.
322
00:18:50,605 --> 00:18:54,540
Frank is totally wrong. You need someone
who's not happy with the way things are.
323
00:18:54,572 --> 00:18:58,072
You need someone who's looking for a
better world, looking for a better life,
324
00:18:58,105 --> 00:19:00,539
who's tortured and living
in an alternate universe
325
00:19:00,572 --> 00:19:05,106
but ultimately is forced to confront
the demons of his own reality.
326
00:19:05,138 --> 00:19:07,239
You sound like you'd
be perfect for the part.
327
00:19:07,273 --> 00:19:09,173
Yeah. What?
328
00:19:09,206 --> 00:19:11,572
It's nice to meet you.
Hey, can I shake your hand?
329
00:19:11,606 --> 00:19:13,873
I'm... I'm your biggest fan.
Please.
330
00:19:13,905 --> 00:19:16,105
Frank, you're not strapped in yet.
You're not strapped in.
331
00:19:16,139 --> 00:19:19,005
Will you calm down, please?
Hey.
332
00:19:19,038 --> 00:19:21,539
Not like I haven't done this
a million times before.
333
00:19:21,572 --> 00:19:22,938
- Know what I mean?
- He's Frank Pierce.
334
00:19:22,972 --> 00:19:24,205
I think he knows
what he's doing.
335
00:19:24,239 --> 00:19:25,973
Please don't use him.
336
00:19:26,006 --> 00:19:27,805
Don't use him.
I'll do anything.
337
00:19:27,839 --> 00:19:29,572
- What happened to you, Max?
- What can I do?
338
00:19:29,605 --> 00:19:31,739
- What happened to you, honestly?
- Nothing...
339
00:19:31,771 --> 00:19:35,172
- The Max I used to know would kill to get his movie made.
- Respect my age, James.
340
00:19:35,205 --> 00:19:37,507
- You worked for me.
- Don't let me down anymore.
341
00:19:37,539 --> 00:19:39,572
- Just stand up for me.
- You're embarrassing me, Max.
342
00:19:39,606 --> 00:19:40,873
- Stand up for me.
- This is sad.
343
00:19:40,906 --> 00:19:42,706
Hey, can I get
your autograph?
344
00:19:44,006 --> 00:19:46,772
- Please.
- Uh, sure.
345
00:19:46,804 --> 00:19:49,674
Just let it go, Max.
Let it go.
346
00:19:52,106 --> 00:19:55,038
This is my letter to the world.
Please. Please.
347
00:19:55,072 --> 00:19:58,206
No. I'm giving it
to Frank Pierce.
348
00:19:58,238 --> 00:20:00,706
Fuck you. Prick.
349
00:20:00,739 --> 00:20:01,873
Here's a pen.
350
00:20:01,905 --> 00:20:03,772
Give me a fucking break.
351
00:20:04,838 --> 00:20:06,539
- Whoa! Oh!
- Jesus!
352
00:20:10,639 --> 00:20:11,838
Frank!
353
00:20:17,038 --> 00:20:18,506
Frank!
354
00:20:23,838 --> 00:20:25,673
Looks like that's lunch.
355
00:20:29,639 --> 00:20:32,639
♪ Such a wonderful day Yes, a wonderful day ♪
356
00:20:32,673 --> 00:20:35,772
♪ I just saw
A movie star fall away ♪
357
00:20:35,804 --> 00:20:38,738
Ha! Walter? Walter?
358
00:20:38,771 --> 00:20:41,673
- Did you see the look on his face?
- Whose? Frank's?
359
00:20:41,704 --> 00:20:44,639
How could you see the look on Frank's face?
He was 20 stories down.
360
00:20:44,672 --> 00:20:46,805
I'm talking about Jimmy,
watching his dreams implode
361
00:20:46,839 --> 00:20:48,739
just like Frank's head
when he hit that bus.
362
00:20:48,771 --> 00:20:53,972
I mean, that look was
fucking priceless! Priceless.
363
00:20:54,006 --> 00:20:56,273
Oh, I loved it. I loved it.
I loved it. I loved it.
364
00:20:56,305 --> 00:20:58,540
Oh! And I have you
to thank for that, Walter.
365
00:20:58,572 --> 00:21:00,705
- What? Why me?
- Yeah, because if you hadn't twisted my arm
366
00:21:00,739 --> 00:21:02,906
to go and sign this deal,
this never would have happened.
367
00:21:02,939 --> 00:21:05,039
- Oh, God...
- You're right, Walter. Oh, God.
368
00:21:05,072 --> 00:21:08,572
It's at times like this that I actually
believe in the big guy upstairs.
369
00:21:08,606 --> 00:21:11,606
- I believe in you!
- What you're saying is so incredibly horrible.
370
00:21:11,640 --> 00:21:13,906
Schadenfreude, Walter.
That's what it's called.
371
00:21:13,938 --> 00:21:17,106
That's what the Germans call it. Pleasure
derived from the misfortune of others.
372
00:21:17,138 --> 00:21:19,806
Leave it to the krauts to come
up with an actual word for it.
373
00:21:19,838 --> 00:21:23,073
I don't want this party to end. I wanna
go back to my place and I wanna get drunk.
374
00:21:23,105 --> 00:21:25,539
- I think I'm gonna throw up.
- You can do whatever you want.
375
00:21:25,572 --> 00:21:30,539
I'm going back there and I am
going to get drunk and celebrate!
376
00:21:30,573 --> 00:21:34,106
- In other news...
- It's on. Come on. It's on. Walter, come on.
377
00:21:34,139 --> 00:21:36,240
- I don't wanna see it.
- Oh, come on. You have to.
378
00:21:36,272 --> 00:21:38,672
It's part of the healing
process. Come on. Come on!
379
00:21:38,704 --> 00:21:41,771
In sad news today, Hollywood is
mourning the loss of one of their own.
380
00:21:41,805 --> 00:21:44,607
Frank Pierce, renowned for
doing all of his own stunts,
381
00:21:44,638 --> 00:21:48,138
died today in a fall from
the Los Angeles Courthouse.
382
00:21:48,172 --> 00:21:52,805
Yeah. We're just, uh...
just shocked, you know?
383
00:21:52,839 --> 00:21:56,972
Do you believe this asshole going on TV like
this, sucking up all the glory for himself?
384
00:21:57,005 --> 00:22:00,205
You're a dick. You're a dick,
you little shithead.
385
00:22:00,239 --> 00:22:05,873
At this time, I would also like to
say that the whole production...
386
00:22:05,906 --> 00:22:09,073
you know, we're gonna
cancel it, uh, out of...
387
00:22:10,103 --> 00:22:11,073
Look at this guy.
He's so fucking phony!
388
00:22:13,705 --> 00:22:19,105
Frank. I love you, Frank.
Frank Pierce, man.
389
00:22:19,139 --> 00:22:21,006
Can you just...
Did you hear that?
390
00:22:21,038 --> 00:22:24,105
Guess whose movie fell apart
this time, jerk-off?
391
00:22:24,138 --> 00:22:26,972
Yours did. It fell. Get it?
392
00:22:27,006 --> 00:22:31,206
It is worth noting, however, that
because Pierce did all of his own stunts,
393
00:22:31,238 --> 00:22:33,506
he was insured
for five million dollars,
394
00:22:33,540 --> 00:22:35,972
a portion of which James Moore
is planning to donate
395
00:22:36,006 --> 00:22:38,606
- to a foundation set up in Pierce's name.
- Five million dollars.
396
00:22:38,639 --> 00:22:40,073
Oh, my God.
Five million dollars.
397
00:22:40,105 --> 00:22:42,506
This scumbag walks away
with five million dollars.
398
00:22:42,540 --> 00:22:47,038
He doesn't shoot a frame of fucking
film, and he makes five million dollars.
399
00:22:47,072 --> 00:22:49,873
I mean, I'm beaten.
I'm done. He's the devil.
400
00:22:49,906 --> 00:22:54,906
I don't have enough holy water, crucifixes, garlic,
a wolf fang to fight this fucking son of a...
401
00:22:54,939 --> 00:22:56,672
- You're a fucking crook!
- Okay.
402
00:22:56,704 --> 00:22:58,539
- You little fucking shit!
- Okay.
403
00:22:58,572 --> 00:23:00,772
- This is a fucking crook. This is crazy.
- Okay. Calm down.
404
00:23:00,804 --> 00:23:03,771
I'm fucking killing me. You see where
I live, in this fucking shithole!
405
00:23:03,805 --> 00:23:05,939
And you little fucking
fake fucking...
406
00:23:05,971 --> 00:23:08,239
- You little shithead!
- You're gonna give yourself a stroke.
407
00:23:08,273 --> 00:23:11,073
Oh, yeah. Please, God, give me a fucking stroke.
408
00:23:11,106 --> 00:23:13,672
Let me die.
Let me go right now.
409
00:23:13,704 --> 00:23:16,571
Let me die.
This is so fucking unjust.
410
00:23:16,604 --> 00:23:19,671
- There's somebody at the door. Can you please calm down?
- What more do I need?
411
00:23:19,705 --> 00:23:22,571
- Hi.
- Hi. Delivery for Mr. Barber from James Moore.
412
00:23:22,605 --> 00:23:25,906
Give us a second and, uh,
we'll get back to you, okay? Thank you.
413
00:23:25,939 --> 00:23:28,206
Ah. The final nail
in the coffin.
414
00:23:28,238 --> 00:23:31,105
Give me a pen, Walter,
so I can stab myself to death
415
00:23:31,138 --> 00:23:33,272
and put myself
out of my fucking misery.
416
00:23:33,306 --> 00:23:35,739
- You're thinking about this the wrong way, Uncle Max.
- I am?
417
00:23:35,771 --> 00:23:38,073
- You're not putting yourself in James's shoes.
- James's shoes?
418
00:23:38,105 --> 00:23:42,272
Remember on Killer Nuns when
Bernadette's habit caught on fire?
419
00:23:42,306 --> 00:23:45,273
- Yeah.
- Well, how would you have felt if she burned to death,
420
00:23:45,306 --> 00:23:49,772
and all you had to show for it
was a lousy insurance check?
421
00:24:03,704 --> 00:24:06,571
You know what, Walter?
As always, you're right.
422
00:24:06,604 --> 00:24:08,072
Thank you.
423
00:24:19,106 --> 00:24:20,840
All right.
424
00:24:21,506 --> 00:24:24,273
Let's give this back to James.
425
00:24:24,306 --> 00:24:27,005
You did it.
You went through with it.
426
00:24:27,038 --> 00:24:29,671
I gotta be honest. I didn't think
you were gonna go through with it.
427
00:24:29,704 --> 00:24:31,940
Of course, I'm gonna go
through with it.
428
00:24:32,971 --> 00:24:34,771
Here you go.
Wait, wait, wait.
429
00:24:34,805 --> 00:24:36,639
Let's give the young man
a nice tip here
430
00:24:36,671 --> 00:24:38,705
- for going out of his way.
- Sure.
431
00:24:41,638 --> 00:24:44,239
- Here you go. And that's for you. Thank you for waiting.
- Sure enough.
432
00:24:44,273 --> 00:24:46,639
Thank you. You did it!
You signed it.
433
00:24:46,671 --> 00:24:49,571
You went through with it.
I'm so proud of you. How does it feel?
434
00:24:49,605 --> 00:24:53,239
Surprisingly wonderful
and invigorating.
435
00:24:53,273 --> 00:24:55,739
I feel very inspired
all of a sudden.
436
00:24:55,772 --> 00:24:58,606
A whole new sense of purpose
is washing over me, Walter.
437
00:24:58,638 --> 00:25:03,006
We're making our next movie, and I wanna
be in production as soon as we can.
438
00:25:03,038 --> 00:25:05,206
It'll be our greatest venture
into the world of cinema.
439
00:25:05,238 --> 00:25:08,072
I love it when you get inspired.
What script do you wanna make?
440
00:25:08,106 --> 00:25:10,139
- What?
- What script do you wanna make?
441
00:25:10,172 --> 00:25:12,840
Uh, the blue one.
442
00:25:14,072 --> 00:25:15,673
- The blue one?
- Yeah.
443
00:25:16,973 --> 00:25:19,572
This is The Oldest Gun in the West.
This is Uncle Eddie's script.
444
00:25:19,605 --> 00:25:22,671
Yeah. May he rest in peace.
The Oldest Gun in the West. It's perfect.
445
00:25:22,705 --> 00:25:25,273
- You hate this script.
- Hated. Past tense.
446
00:25:25,305 --> 00:25:28,738
- So you like it now?
- Like it? I love it.
447
00:25:28,771 --> 00:25:31,738
I can't think of anything more
worthy of being put on celluloid.
448
00:25:31,771 --> 00:25:33,571
- That's what I've been saying forever.
- I know.
449
00:25:33,604 --> 00:25:35,805
I love this script.
How could you not love the story
450
00:25:35,839 --> 00:25:39,639
of a washed-up cowboy finding
out that he has Indian blood
451
00:25:39,672 --> 00:25:43,738
and then helping his tribe drive out
all the bigoted members of the town
452
00:25:43,772 --> 00:25:46,939
that have settled on their land after
screwing them over in a horrible land deal?
453
00:25:46,972 --> 00:25:49,006
It's a...
It's a magnificent story.
454
00:25:49,038 --> 00:25:51,805
Oh, my God. All this time, I thought
you weren't even listening to me.
455
00:25:51,839 --> 00:25:54,273
Of course, I've been listening.
Sometimes it takes a little time
456
00:25:54,305 --> 00:25:57,239
for the words to sink
into this skull of mine.
457
00:25:57,272 --> 00:26:00,506
So what do you say, Walter? How about it?
458
00:26:00,538 --> 00:26:03,639
Are you kidding me?
I am so in, partner.
459
00:26:04,839 --> 00:26:08,106
- Let's go find our star.
- Okay. Back at it.
460
00:26:13,671 --> 00:26:15,638
I don't know about this,
Uncle Max.
461
00:26:15,672 --> 00:26:17,538
- These people look really...
- Talented?
462
00:26:17,571 --> 00:26:19,671
- Old.
- Yeah. That's the point.
463
00:26:19,705 --> 00:26:22,906
- There's a lot of dangerous stunts in this film.
- I know.
464
00:26:22,938 --> 00:26:27,739
Walter, my dear nephew,
who doesn't love a comeback?
465
00:26:27,771 --> 00:26:29,506
Think of what
we're gonna do.
466
00:26:29,538 --> 00:26:31,239
We're gonna give
one of these forgotten souls
467
00:26:31,273 --> 00:26:34,106
one last shot at glory while
giving their adoring public,
468
00:26:34,138 --> 00:26:37,939
our ticket buyers, the chance
to relive their childhoods.
469
00:26:37,971 --> 00:26:40,506
I mean, that's beautiful,
isn't it?
470
00:26:41,405 --> 00:26:43,639
- It kind of is when you put it that way.
- Yes.
471
00:26:43,672 --> 00:26:44,973
Come on.
472
00:26:51,804 --> 00:26:54,272
- Morning.
- Good morning, gentlemen.
473
00:26:54,306 --> 00:26:56,639
- Good morning.
- Are you here to tour the facility?
474
00:26:56,672 --> 00:26:59,239
Well, not in the manner that
you're thinking. We're producers.
475
00:26:59,273 --> 00:27:01,005
Film producers.
My name is Max Barber.
476
00:27:01,039 --> 00:27:02,672
This is my partner,
Walter Creason.
477
00:27:02,705 --> 00:27:04,173
And we're from
Miracle Motion Pictures.
478
00:27:04,205 --> 00:27:06,838
We're looking to cast
our male lead
479
00:27:06,872 --> 00:27:08,804
- in our new film.
- Oh.
480
00:27:08,839 --> 00:27:11,539
- Did you say producers?
- Yes, I did.
481
00:27:11,571 --> 00:27:13,973
I lived in New York
for 35 years.
482
00:27:14,005 --> 00:27:16,739
I did 16 Broadway musicals.
483
00:27:16,771 --> 00:27:20,805
I'm a singer. I'm a dancer.
I did two shows with Bob Fosse.
484
00:27:20,839 --> 00:27:26,839
Hack! What you need is someone with
real acting chops. Not some old hoofer.
485
00:27:26,872 --> 00:27:30,273
I starred alongside
Laurence Olivier,
486
00:27:30,304 --> 00:27:33,539
Ingrid Bergman
and Orson Welles.
487
00:27:33,571 --> 00:27:35,505
- Well, that's impressive.
- That's impressive.
488
00:27:35,538 --> 00:27:38,605
Oh, you wanna see
impressive? Watch this.
489
00:27:40,072 --> 00:27:41,705
Oh!
490
00:27:46,705 --> 00:27:49,772
Oh! My heart. Help.
491
00:27:49,804 --> 00:27:52,206
Doctor!
492
00:27:55,572 --> 00:27:58,672
I'm telling you, if he's not actually
dead, that was pretty damn convincing.
493
00:27:58,705 --> 00:28:04,206
Who gives a shit if he's alive or dead?
What you need is a strong female character.
494
00:28:04,239 --> 00:28:07,505
I think we'll probably go just a
little bit younger with the female...
495
00:28:07,538 --> 00:28:09,538
- I was a child actor.
- Were you?
496
00:28:09,571 --> 00:28:12,539
Maybe you saw me in The Dead End Kids.
I was the kid on the end.
497
00:28:12,571 --> 00:28:14,705
You gotta get me out of here.
498
00:28:14,739 --> 00:28:16,772
Come on back to my room
and I'll show you
499
00:28:16,804 --> 00:28:19,072
just how right I am
for the role.
500
00:28:19,739 --> 00:28:21,839
Uncle Max,
one of them's got me.
501
00:28:21,872 --> 00:28:24,572
- I'm trying...
- No. I'll pay you.
502
00:28:24,604 --> 00:28:27,238
Put me in the trunk of your car.
Just take me with you.
503
00:28:27,272 --> 00:28:30,039
- Just take your fucking hands off me.
- Take me with you.
504
00:28:30,071 --> 00:28:32,505
Go. We'll talk
to you later.
505
00:28:38,005 --> 00:28:39,805
Quick. Walter, in here.
506
00:28:45,171 --> 00:28:46,505
Uh, sorry to interrupt.
507
00:28:49,205 --> 00:28:52,972
Oh, my God. You're Duke Montana.
The Man with the Golden Lasso.
508
00:28:53,006 --> 00:28:56,606
Uh, you think you fellas can
give me a little privacy here?
509
00:28:56,639 --> 00:28:59,838
- You're Duke Montana?
- Yeah. That's Duke Montana. What are you doing, Duke Montana?
510
00:28:59,872 --> 00:29:02,106
My daily game
of Russian roulette.
511
00:29:03,038 --> 00:29:05,706
You could kill yourself
doing something like that.
512
00:29:05,738 --> 00:29:07,872
- It's more like euthanasia.
- But it's wrong.
513
00:29:07,906 --> 00:29:10,073
Wrong? I'm gonna kill
somebody, son.
514
00:29:10,106 --> 00:29:12,073
- You reckon you'd rather it be you?
- Wait, wait.
515
00:29:12,105 --> 00:29:15,105
Duke. Duke. Mr. Montana, you can't kill us.
We're producers.
516
00:29:15,139 --> 00:29:17,705
I've always wanted
to kill producers.
517
00:29:17,739 --> 00:29:20,639
Look, even ones that came here
to give you your next part?
518
00:29:20,672 --> 00:29:22,670
- My next part?
- That's right, Duke.
519
00:29:22,705 --> 00:29:24,572
Now, if you... if you'll
put that gun down,
520
00:29:24,604 --> 00:29:26,671
my partner here and I
would like to offer you
521
00:29:26,705 --> 00:29:29,072
- the leading role in our next film.
- Shit.
522
00:29:29,106 --> 00:29:32,006
Uh, can we just have
a quick chat?
523
00:29:32,038 --> 00:29:34,038
Yeah.
Excuse us a moment.
524
00:29:34,072 --> 00:29:36,005
- One moment.
- Yeah?
525
00:29:36,039 --> 00:29:37,806
Him? You're offering
him the part?
526
00:29:37,838 --> 00:29:39,739
Yeah. I'm offering him
the part. He's perfect.
527
00:29:39,771 --> 00:29:42,105
- He's suicidal.
- He's a star, Walter.
528
00:29:42,139 --> 00:29:45,939
- He's worked with John Ford, John Huston. He's perfect.
- That was 20 years ago.
529
00:29:45,972 --> 00:29:49,739
So what? Think about all the pain and hardship
and anguish that must have brought him
530
00:29:49,771 --> 00:29:52,572
to this very moment in his life
where he's ready to kill himself.
531
00:29:52,604 --> 00:29:54,938
Imagine bringing that pain
to this character.
532
00:29:54,972 --> 00:29:58,205
- I mean, that's charisma. That's depth. That's gravitas.
- That's insane.
533
00:29:58,238 --> 00:30:00,506
- No, it's not.
- Let me save you boys the trouble.
534
00:30:00,538 --> 00:30:02,972
- You don't know what you're talking about.
- I'm not interested.
535
00:30:03,006 --> 00:30:05,505
I'm totally washed up.
536
00:30:05,539 --> 00:30:10,205
I have no desire whatsoever to make
any kind of a goddamn comeback.
537
00:30:10,238 --> 00:30:11,738
I just wanna die.
538
00:30:13,738 --> 00:30:15,171
¿Comprende, amigos?
539
00:30:17,039 --> 00:30:19,972
¿Comprende, amigos?
540
00:30:20,006 --> 00:30:24,806
Duke, I... I've got to tell you,
as an experienced producer,
541
00:30:24,839 --> 00:30:27,873
you are perfect
for this particular part.
542
00:30:27,905 --> 00:30:30,137
I can't think of
anybody better than you.
543
00:30:30,170 --> 00:30:32,605
You know what? Let's leave him alone.
I think he might be afraid.
544
00:30:32,639 --> 00:30:34,672
Afraid? Duke Montana's
not afraid of a goddamn thing!
545
00:30:34,704 --> 00:30:36,204
No, no. Duke,
I didn't mean afraid afraid.
546
00:30:36,238 --> 00:30:38,006
You don't think
I can do this role?
547
00:30:38,038 --> 00:30:40,038
No, you're the one
who said that you were finished.
548
00:30:40,072 --> 00:30:41,839
- I'll be the judge of that.
- That's right.
549
00:30:41,871 --> 00:30:43,205
You let him
be the judge of that.
550
00:30:43,237 --> 00:30:45,005
- He was the judge of that.
- He is the judge.
551
00:30:45,039 --> 00:30:46,905
- And I'm the judge of it.
- You both judge...
552
00:30:46,939 --> 00:30:48,006
Goddamn it.
553
00:30:55,638 --> 00:30:56,939
Oh...
554
00:31:15,571 --> 00:31:17,572
I'm in, fellers.
555
00:31:18,104 --> 00:31:20,972
I am in.
556
00:31:23,238 --> 00:31:24,606
Duke.
557
00:31:26,271 --> 00:31:27,940
- Congratulations.
- Yeah.
558
00:31:39,237 --> 00:31:42,571
Oh. Hey. Is Bess home?
559
00:31:42,605 --> 00:31:44,139
No, Mr. Montana,
she's not here.
560
00:31:44,939 --> 00:31:46,272
Yeah.
561
00:31:46,305 --> 00:31:48,006
Will she be back later?
562
00:31:48,037 --> 00:31:50,171
No, sir. She's out of town.
563
00:31:50,205 --> 00:31:51,505
Oh.
564
00:31:52,739 --> 00:31:56,805
You know if she's been reading
my letters or throwing them out?
565
00:31:57,871 --> 00:32:00,071
Oh, hell. Never mind.
That's not a fair question.
566
00:32:00,105 --> 00:32:03,105
Ah, just... just tell her
that I was here.
567
00:32:03,137 --> 00:32:05,738
Please, you tell her
that I came by.
568
00:32:06,538 --> 00:32:07,573
Sure.
569
00:32:08,804 --> 00:32:09,840
Yeah.
570
00:32:39,137 --> 00:32:42,838
Hey!
You guys should pay rent.
571
00:32:42,872 --> 00:32:45,839
I hope that's my money
you got in that bag, Max.
572
00:32:45,871 --> 00:32:46,972
Well...
573
00:32:48,938 --> 00:32:54,271
I got moo goo gai pan, I got ribs,
egg rolls maybe. Anything else, huh?
574
00:32:54,305 --> 00:32:56,238
All I want is my money.
575
00:32:56,272 --> 00:32:59,705
Just give me my money,
and me and the boys will be on our way.
576
00:32:59,739 --> 00:33:02,506
What? On an empty stomach?
Come on, Reggie.
577
00:33:02,538 --> 00:33:05,538
Why don't you guys grab some plates
over in the cupboard over there
578
00:33:05,572 --> 00:33:07,606
and some silverware
over in this drawer over here,
579
00:33:07,638 --> 00:33:11,105
and then I could tell you how
you can make some real money?
580
00:33:11,137 --> 00:33:13,571
How about five times more
than your money?
581
00:33:13,604 --> 00:33:17,671
Don't tell me you want me to invest
in another goddamn movie, Max.
582
00:33:17,705 --> 00:33:20,204
That's the exact same spiel
you used before.
583
00:33:20,238 --> 00:33:22,839
But the difference is...
the difference is this time,
584
00:33:22,872 --> 00:33:25,839
I can absolutely guarantee that
you're gonna make a ton of money.
585
00:33:25,871 --> 00:33:27,806
You guaranteed it the last time.
586
00:33:27,839 --> 00:33:30,071
Same shit,
different day, Max.
587
00:33:30,104 --> 00:33:33,905
Then I'm guaranteeing it again with a
completely new guarantee. How about that?
588
00:33:33,937 --> 00:33:35,671
All right. That's enough.
589
00:33:35,704 --> 00:33:37,137
Choke the fucking life
out of him.
590
00:33:37,171 --> 00:33:39,739
No, no, no, no, no. Please.
591
00:33:39,772 --> 00:33:42,037
Reggie...
592
00:33:42,070 --> 00:33:44,872
- What? What?
- Don't you at least wanna hear what I have to say?
593
00:33:44,905 --> 00:33:49,271
About some goddamn movie? No. All I want
to hear is you struggling to breathe.
594
00:33:49,304 --> 00:33:51,873
But, Reggie, I'm telling you,
this can't fail. Just listen.
595
00:33:51,904 --> 00:33:55,571
You can crush my windpipe
in a minute, but just listen.
596
00:33:55,604 --> 00:33:58,937
All right, Max.
One minute. You got one minute.
597
00:33:58,971 --> 00:34:02,272
Okay. Ooh, oh, boy. Yeah.
598
00:34:02,305 --> 00:34:07,572
Uh, well, look, I got a script.
I've got Duke Montana.
599
00:34:07,605 --> 00:34:09,204
- Duke Montana?
- Yeah.
600
00:34:09,237 --> 00:34:10,971
Duke Montana.
601
00:34:13,171 --> 00:34:15,839
- He's alive?
- Yeah. Barely, but he's alive.
602
00:34:17,205 --> 00:34:20,104
All I need to get
this payday going,
603
00:34:20,137 --> 00:34:26,539
all I need to do to get this absolute
guaranteed payday off the ground,
604
00:34:26,571 --> 00:34:28,705
just some money, that's all,
just a little money.
605
00:34:29,704 --> 00:34:31,072
How much money, Max?
606
00:34:31,904 --> 00:34:32,972
A million dollars?
607
00:34:33,004 --> 00:34:34,272
Kill him.
608
00:34:34,304 --> 00:34:36,505
No, no, no.
That's not a minute.
609
00:34:36,538 --> 00:34:38,805
You said you'd give me
a minute...
610
00:34:38,838 --> 00:34:41,738
It's not a minute...
611
00:34:41,772 --> 00:34:45,005
That's not a minute.
You said you'd give me a minute.
612
00:34:45,038 --> 00:34:47,971
Cut me some slack.
We're not really gonna be making a movie.
613
00:34:48,004 --> 00:34:51,639
We're gonna make it look like we're
shooting a movie. It's a scam.
614
00:34:51,671 --> 00:34:53,472
Whoa. Wait.
615
00:34:58,539 --> 00:34:59,573
Let him go.
616
00:35:02,805 --> 00:35:04,071
Come over here, Maxy.
617
00:35:13,037 --> 00:35:14,239
Have a seat.
618
00:35:16,038 --> 00:35:20,706
Now you're speaking my language.
What do you mean a scam?
619
00:35:20,738 --> 00:35:22,871
A scam.
620
00:35:22,904 --> 00:35:25,571
But we make it look like we're actually
gonna be putting together a movie,
621
00:35:25,605 --> 00:35:27,806
that we're serious about it,
the bigger, the better.
622
00:35:27,837 --> 00:35:29,771
We'll make an entire movie.
623
00:35:29,804 --> 00:35:32,172
We heavily insure the star
who will do his own stunts,
624
00:35:32,204 --> 00:35:33,838
which Duke Montana will do,
625
00:35:33,871 --> 00:35:35,672
and on the first day
of shooting,
626
00:35:35,705 --> 00:35:37,272
bang,
we kill him in a stunt.
627
00:35:37,305 --> 00:35:39,672
He's dead,
and the insurance companies,
628
00:35:39,705 --> 00:35:41,272
they pay us all off.
629
00:35:41,304 --> 00:35:45,172
And then what?
We're rich. We're rich.
630
00:36:03,739 --> 00:36:05,839
- You say you got egg rolls?
- Yeah. Yeah.
631
00:36:07,738 --> 00:36:09,206
Find the egg rolls.
632
00:36:27,738 --> 00:36:30,905
How is it a guy making a million-dollar
movie don't have a better car?
633
00:36:30,937 --> 00:36:33,804
Well, Duke, I don't believe
in ostentatious flamboyance.
634
00:36:33,838 --> 00:36:38,038
- I believe it corrupts and corrodes the creative process.
- Creative process?
635
00:36:38,070 --> 00:36:41,538
Your last movie was about a bunch of
fucking nuns slashing people to ribbons.
636
00:36:41,572 --> 00:36:43,072
That ain't
exactly Shakespeare.
637
00:36:43,105 --> 00:36:45,104
Trying to hurt my feelings.
That what you're doing?
638
00:36:45,137 --> 00:36:47,238
You got feelings now? You told me
you're a motion picture producer.
639
00:36:47,271 --> 00:36:50,004
Fine. Okay. Any other sober insights
you'd like to get off your chest?
640
00:36:50,038 --> 00:36:52,239
Yeah. Who in the hell
would finance
641
00:36:52,271 --> 00:36:54,538
a million-dollar movie
with me,
642
00:36:54,572 --> 00:36:56,606
a broke-down,
over-the-hill has-been?
643
00:36:56,639 --> 00:36:58,238
That don't make any sense.
644
00:36:58,271 --> 00:37:00,505
Max is financing it
himself, Duke.
645
00:37:00,539 --> 00:37:02,071
Yeah, he just came into
a bunch of money.
646
00:37:02,104 --> 00:37:04,004
He's putting every dime
he has into it.
647
00:37:04,038 --> 00:37:06,239
- You really did that?
- Yes, I did.
648
00:37:08,605 --> 00:37:10,271
What are you? Stupid?
649
00:37:10,304 --> 00:37:13,271
No. No, Duke. I'm not stupid at all.
I believe in you.
650
00:37:13,305 --> 00:37:16,572
I believe in Duke Montana and
I believe that your big comeback
651
00:37:16,604 --> 00:37:18,606
is exactly what the world
wants to see right now.
652
00:37:24,538 --> 00:37:26,272
- Go ahead, yeah?
- Go ahead.
653
00:37:26,304 --> 00:37:30,005
He is the oldest gun
in the West, correct?
654
00:37:30,038 --> 00:37:32,770
Now, he's not what
he used to be. No.
655
00:37:32,803 --> 00:37:36,571
Shaking hands, huh?
Failing eyesight.
656
00:37:36,604 --> 00:37:40,605
So, I want to shoot
the whole movie
657
00:37:40,638 --> 00:37:43,271
with a camera that is
always shaking, huh?
658
00:37:43,305 --> 00:37:46,671
The camera, it's, like,
it has uh, Parkinson's Disease.
659
00:37:46,704 --> 00:37:49,104
- Do you understand?
- Uh-huh.
660
00:37:49,138 --> 00:37:52,670
And all of it should be...
should be out of focus, huh?
661
00:37:52,703 --> 00:37:55,138
Just like
his failing eyesight.
662
00:37:55,170 --> 00:37:59,605
Yeah. The whole movie should be... should
be shaking and out of focus, all of it.
663
00:38:01,937 --> 00:38:05,271
Yeah. That's a...
That's a way to go.
664
00:38:05,305 --> 00:38:08,971
Oppression, motherfuckers.
That's what this movie is about.
665
00:38:09,004 --> 00:38:14,505
Indians ain't nothing but niggas of the West
oppressed by whitey, and the cavalry the man.
666
00:38:14,539 --> 00:38:18,105
When this white cracker,
ofay motherfucker
667
00:38:18,138 --> 00:38:21,506
finds out he's got Indian blood
coursing through his veins.
668
00:38:21,539 --> 00:38:22,872
So, what does he do?
669
00:38:22,905 --> 00:38:25,905
He embraces
his own inner nigga
670
00:38:25,938 --> 00:38:28,872
and takes over the goddamn
imperialist government machine.
671
00:38:28,904 --> 00:38:30,204
Do you smell that?
672
00:38:35,671 --> 00:38:37,705
It smells like an Oscar.
673
00:38:40,704 --> 00:38:45,704
Well, I felt like I
really connected to the story,
674
00:38:45,737 --> 00:38:47,871
and especially
the main character.
675
00:38:47,905 --> 00:38:52,004
As a matter of fact, my heart broke for him.
676
00:38:52,037 --> 00:38:55,571
It seemed as if
he was living a lie.
677
00:38:55,604 --> 00:38:59,572
It was as if all along he knew
that he was something else.
678
00:38:59,603 --> 00:39:04,005
He just didn't know
how to express it.
679
00:39:06,137 --> 00:39:07,904
I know this character.
680
00:39:07,938 --> 00:39:11,538
I know this character
very well.
681
00:39:11,571 --> 00:39:16,538
And I know if you
give me a chance,
682
00:39:16,571 --> 00:39:20,071
I can do a great job.
683
00:39:20,105 --> 00:39:22,038
But you're a woman.
684
00:39:22,071 --> 00:39:24,172
- So?
- No. It's, you know...
685
00:39:24,204 --> 00:39:26,505
It's just kind of, like,
a guy's movie, right?
686
00:39:26,539 --> 00:39:28,804
There's a lot of gunfights,
687
00:39:28,837 --> 00:39:31,570
big stunts, drinking,
womanizing.
688
00:39:31,604 --> 00:39:35,172
But your movie is so much more than just that.
689
00:39:35,204 --> 00:39:37,538
- Oh, is it?
- Yes.
690
00:39:37,571 --> 00:39:39,938
She'll do. Hire her.
691
00:39:39,971 --> 00:39:43,506
Uh, but, Duke, with all due respect,
it's sort of a guy's movie, you know?
692
00:39:43,539 --> 00:39:46,770
- Yeah. Hire her.
- Yeah. But, Duke, it's like a rootin'-tootin' Western.
693
00:39:46,803 --> 00:39:48,770
You know? It's very masculine.
694
00:39:52,637 --> 00:39:54,238
Okay. Our star has spoken.
695
00:39:54,272 --> 00:39:55,538
Congratulations.
696
00:39:56,071 --> 00:39:58,604
Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
697
00:39:58,637 --> 00:40:00,871
Thank you, guys. Thank you.
698
00:40:01,670 --> 00:40:05,171
Thank you.
You won't be disappointed.
699
00:40:10,538 --> 00:40:12,804
Thank you, Mr. Montana.
700
00:40:14,205 --> 00:40:18,272
When I was a little girl, my dad would
take me to the movies to see you.
701
00:40:18,304 --> 00:40:24,571
When you'd appear on screen,
he'd say, "Now, that is a hero.
702
00:40:24,604 --> 00:40:27,972
That's what a real man
looks and sounds like."
703
00:40:29,671 --> 00:40:30,872
Well, now, I know.
704
00:40:30,904 --> 00:40:34,537
He was right. Thank you.
705
00:40:34,570 --> 00:40:35,971
Thank you, guys.
706
00:40:41,205 --> 00:40:42,839
She'll do.
707
00:41:03,938 --> 00:41:07,038
Sitting all alone?
708
00:41:07,071 --> 00:41:10,871
Uncle Max, I don't know how you did
it, but once again, you pulled it off.
709
00:41:10,905 --> 00:41:12,905
Ah.
Well, thank you, Walter.
710
00:41:12,938 --> 00:41:15,538
These people are ready
to die for you.
711
00:41:15,571 --> 00:41:18,537
Not the best choice of
words, but again, thank you.
712
00:41:18,571 --> 00:41:22,239
And the... And the setting, they just
did... the atmosphere, it's perfect.
713
00:41:22,271 --> 00:41:24,271
Uncle Eddie would
be very proud of us.
714
00:41:24,305 --> 00:41:27,038
- May he rest in peace.
- Amen.
715
00:41:27,071 --> 00:41:30,804
By the way, the cherry on top, did you see
that old drive-in we passed on the way up?
716
00:41:30,838 --> 00:41:32,771
- No, I didn't.
- Well, it's pretty beat up.
717
00:41:32,804 --> 00:41:35,104
But I asked around.
The projector still works.
718
00:41:35,137 --> 00:41:38,604
We could screen our dailies
underneath the stars.
719
00:41:38,638 --> 00:41:40,272
- How great would that be?
- Wonderful.
720
00:41:40,304 --> 00:41:42,137
- We should do it.
- Yeah. That's... We will.
721
00:41:42,170 --> 00:41:43,971
Definitely gonna do that.
722
00:41:44,005 --> 00:41:46,238
You know,
I'm just so happy.
723
00:41:46,271 --> 00:41:50,704
I've heard this expression before, but
I never understood it until this movie.
724
00:41:50,737 --> 00:41:53,704
I know what they mean
when they say, "Movie magic."
725
00:41:53,737 --> 00:41:56,172
- You said it.
- I'm very proud to be your partner.
726
00:41:56,205 --> 00:41:59,572
- To success.
- In whatever form she may come.
727
00:42:01,637 --> 00:42:03,838
Mr. Barber,
the animal trainer is here for you.
728
00:42:03,870 --> 00:42:05,905
- Oh!
- Excuse me, Walter.
729
00:42:05,937 --> 00:42:07,770
Sure. That's exciting.
730
00:42:07,803 --> 00:42:10,071
- Oh, hey, Mr. Barber.
- Hey. Hey there, Duke.
731
00:42:10,105 --> 00:42:11,805
- Everything all right?
- Oh, sure, fine.
732
00:42:11,837 --> 00:42:13,904
I'm just thinking
about having a drink.
733
00:42:13,938 --> 00:42:17,105
Good. Good. Well, have a whole bunch.
Charge it all to me.
734
00:42:17,138 --> 00:42:19,272
That's very kind of you,
Mr. Barber.
735
00:42:19,305 --> 00:42:21,537
No problem. My pleasure.
736
00:42:21,570 --> 00:42:23,937
Hey, Mr. Barber. You're paying
for everyone's drink?
737
00:42:23,970 --> 00:42:25,537
No, not yours.
738
00:42:28,737 --> 00:42:31,837
Max Barber. Bob Stillwater.
739
00:42:31,870 --> 00:42:34,737
- Hey, Bob. Nice to meet you.
- Nice to meet you too, I guess.
740
00:42:34,771 --> 00:42:37,037
- Yeah. Well, guess what?
- What?
741
00:42:37,071 --> 00:42:40,705
Here he is. This is gonna be our
stunt horse, old Butterscotch.
742
00:42:40,737 --> 00:42:43,937
- Beautiful horse.
- Oh, he's not just a horse.
743
00:42:43,970 --> 00:42:47,604
- He's not?
- No. Butterscotch is a champion. A giant.
744
00:42:47,638 --> 00:42:51,538
- Well, he's a legend amongst legends.
- Mm-hmm.
745
00:42:51,571 --> 00:42:53,771
John Wayne says it's the
greatest horse he's ever ridden.
746
00:42:53,804 --> 00:42:55,605
- He did?
- Yes, sir.
747
00:42:55,637 --> 00:42:58,239
- Wow.
- Oh, yeah.
748
00:42:58,271 --> 00:43:02,072
Tell him, Butterscotch. Tell Mr. Barber
how many movies you made with John Wayne.
749
00:43:04,138 --> 00:43:07,038
- See that will be one, and that'll be two.
- Wow.
750
00:43:07,070 --> 00:43:09,837
And that'll be three
and that'll be four.
751
00:43:09,870 --> 00:43:11,670
Four?
752
00:43:11,703 --> 00:43:13,238
Oh, now he's just lying.
753
00:43:13,271 --> 00:43:15,071
You stop all that lying,
Butterscotch.
754
00:43:15,104 --> 00:43:17,771
Well, sometimes he'll do that.
I got this.
755
00:43:19,205 --> 00:43:22,838
Oh, somebody was telling me you wanna know
everything old Butterscotch here can do?
756
00:43:22,871 --> 00:43:26,537
Well, I do, Bob. Why don't we discuss
it over a couple of drinks inside?
757
00:43:26,570 --> 00:43:28,238
Oh, you read my mind.
758
00:43:30,704 --> 00:43:32,272
Johnny Carson.
759
00:43:35,603 --> 00:43:37,704
Where the hell is he going?
760
00:43:37,737 --> 00:43:39,238
- Where's he going?
- Yeah.
761
00:43:39,272 --> 00:43:41,272
Going back to the trailer,
settle in.
762
00:43:41,304 --> 00:43:43,805
Take a nap.
Watch The Tonight Show.
763
00:43:43,837 --> 00:43:47,204
- The Tonight Show?
- The Tonight Show. Don Rickles is the guest.
764
00:43:47,237 --> 00:43:49,238
- Okay.
- That's got to be Butterscotch's favorite.
765
00:43:49,271 --> 00:43:52,704
Who doesn't like Don Rickles?
766
00:43:52,738 --> 00:43:55,805
That's quite the impressive steed
you got there, Bob. I gotta say.
767
00:43:55,838 --> 00:43:58,670
I mean, when I saw him take off
for his trailer to catch Carson,
768
00:43:58,703 --> 00:44:01,804
I said, "Oh my God.
This is amazing."
769
00:44:01,838 --> 00:44:04,205
- Well, actually that's just the tip of the iceberg.
- Really?
770
00:44:04,238 --> 00:44:06,738
Oh, yeah. You should
see everything he can do.
771
00:44:06,771 --> 00:44:09,005
- Like what?
- Like what?
772
00:44:09,037 --> 00:44:12,738
- Yeah.
- Well, like if you say the word "pumpkin," he's gonna bow.
773
00:44:12,770 --> 00:44:14,239
- He bows?
- Yeah.
774
00:44:17,071 --> 00:44:21,239
If you say... If you say the word
"mattress," he'll lay down.
775
00:44:21,272 --> 00:44:24,704
- Nice.
- Yeah.
776
00:44:24,737 --> 00:44:28,637
Hey, listen. If you...
If you say the word "rocket"...
777
00:44:28,671 --> 00:44:32,538
- Then what?
- Pew! He's gone, like a bat out of hell.
778
00:44:32,571 --> 00:44:33,772
Yeah, right.
779
00:44:35,205 --> 00:44:38,505
- Oh yeah. "Sassafras."
- What happens?
780
00:44:38,538 --> 00:44:40,505
- He rears straight up.
- He rears up.
781
00:44:40,538 --> 00:44:43,172
Straight up.
782
00:44:43,204 --> 00:44:46,537
- That's something.
- That is something.
783
00:44:46,570 --> 00:44:52,671
I heard there was a word that if you
even suggest even the beginning of it,
784
00:44:52,703 --> 00:44:56,137
- somehow he will just go ape shit.
- No, no, no. No, mm-mmm.
785
00:44:56,171 --> 00:44:58,071
You sure?
You can just tell me.
786
00:44:58,104 --> 00:45:00,605
I mean, I'm not gonna say
anything to anybody. Just tell me.
787
00:45:00,637 --> 00:45:02,938
No, no. It's too dangerous.
He gonna get somebody hurt.
788
00:45:02,970 --> 00:45:06,771
- I'll take my chances.
- Are you sure?
789
00:45:06,803 --> 00:45:09,237
I'll never say it in front
of him. I'm just curious.
790
00:45:09,270 --> 00:45:12,937
Hey, listen, listen, listen, listen.
Okay. If you're that stupid...
791
00:45:12,971 --> 00:45:14,538
- Yeah.
- It's "rhubarb."
792
00:45:14,571 --> 00:45:15,938
Rhubarb?
793
00:45:15,970 --> 00:45:18,004
Rhubarb.
794
00:45:18,037 --> 00:45:19,671
What happens?
795
00:45:19,703 --> 00:45:21,504
No, no, no.
796
00:45:21,538 --> 00:45:24,172
- You don't wanna go there. Oh, no, no.
- Okay...
797
00:45:24,205 --> 00:45:25,938
- Yeah. Let me see.
- Amazing.
798
00:45:25,971 --> 00:45:28,238
Oh, buddy. Hey, let me
get a light from you.
799
00:45:28,271 --> 00:45:31,804
Yeah.
Right there, buddy. Oh.
800
00:45:34,571 --> 00:45:36,104
Oh, man.
Thank you so much.
801
00:45:36,137 --> 00:45:37,838
Look at you, man.
802
00:45:37,870 --> 00:45:39,939
Yeah, we're down.
Very good for you, man.
803
00:45:41,105 --> 00:45:42,472
Well...
804
00:45:44,236 --> 00:45:47,138
- To Butterscotch.
- Oh, yeah, to Butterscotch, huh?
805
00:45:49,304 --> 00:45:51,038
Ooh!
806
00:45:51,071 --> 00:45:54,571
Amazing horse.
807
00:45:54,603 --> 00:45:57,704
I just got to make a couple of
notes about tomorrow's shoot, Bob.
808
00:45:57,738 --> 00:45:59,238
Give me a second.
809
00:46:12,937 --> 00:46:15,770
- I wanna thank you, sir.
- Oh, about what?
810
00:46:15,803 --> 00:46:17,637
I'm no ingrate, Mr. Barber.
811
00:46:17,671 --> 00:46:19,971
- I think I've been a little bit tough on you.
- Oh...
812
00:46:20,004 --> 00:46:23,804
I've found most producers to be the lowest
form of human life imaginable, you know.
813
00:46:23,837 --> 00:46:27,670
People that would throw their own mother
out the window just for a ham sandwich.
814
00:46:27,704 --> 00:46:31,238
- You, sir, you're different.
- Thank you, Duke.
815
00:46:31,271 --> 00:46:34,670
If it wasn't for you, I'd be six
foot under up on Boot Hill right now.
816
00:46:34,703 --> 00:46:36,737
- Uh-huh.
- Gonna use the bathroom...
817
00:46:40,637 --> 00:46:44,037
Kalispell, just outside of Whitefish.
You ever hear of it?
818
00:46:44,071 --> 00:46:45,804
Uh, no, no, I didn't.
819
00:46:45,837 --> 00:46:48,637
My dad raised me to be
a farmer, not a cowboy.
820
00:46:48,671 --> 00:46:54,871
We raised wheat and barley,
lentils, garlic,
821
00:46:54,904 --> 00:46:56,971
sugar beets
the size of pumpkins,
822
00:46:57,005 --> 00:46:59,538
- homemade sarsaparilla.
- No kidding. Wow.
823
00:46:59,571 --> 00:47:02,838
Listen, I have a very important
note I have to write here.
824
00:47:02,870 --> 00:47:04,805
Okay.
How can I help you?
825
00:47:04,838 --> 00:47:07,004
- Well, no, no, it's for my mother.
- What I'm talking about
826
00:47:07,037 --> 00:47:09,203
is the fragrances
of rhododendron, Mr. Barber.
827
00:47:09,237 --> 00:47:13,671
- The rhododendrons?
- The lonesome cry of the mischievous coyote.
828
00:47:13,704 --> 00:47:17,171
Flathead Indians,
Missouri Breaks.
829
00:47:17,203 --> 00:47:19,571
- That's nice.
- Wigwams.
830
00:47:19,603 --> 00:47:22,604
I have no idea what you're
saying, but it sounds nice.
831
00:47:22,637 --> 00:47:24,604
What I'm trying to say,
Mr. Barber,
832
00:47:24,638 --> 00:47:28,705
is that you are a cool drink
of Cheyenne spring water
833
00:47:28,737 --> 00:47:32,971
after a long gallop across
the golden, arid prairie.
834
00:47:33,005 --> 00:47:34,672
Thanks, thanks.
835
00:47:35,870 --> 00:47:38,838
Shit. I am sorry
about that. Here...
836
00:47:40,137 --> 00:47:42,638
- Big help. Thank you.
- Sure.
837
00:47:42,671 --> 00:47:46,171
Oh, yeah. Thanks.
838
00:48:07,905 --> 00:48:09,771
- Over there.
- Perfect, perfect.
839
00:48:09,803 --> 00:48:11,671
Megan, are you sure
you wanna shoot that way?
840
00:48:11,704 --> 00:48:13,537
You'll be shooting directly
into the sun.
841
00:48:13,571 --> 00:48:17,071
I want my star backlit.
I want him to look glorious.
842
00:48:17,103 --> 00:48:19,737
- Now put the camera right there.
- Yes, perfect. Perfect.
843
00:48:19,770 --> 00:48:21,604
Megan... Hi.
All the wagons are brown.
844
00:48:21,637 --> 00:48:23,704
Can we just please add a splash
of color in there somewhere?
845
00:48:23,737 --> 00:48:26,070
No, Danny.
I want them to look real.
846
00:48:26,103 --> 00:48:29,838
You know, dirty, like the wagons who traveled
hundreds of miles across the plains.
847
00:48:29,870 --> 00:48:33,671
Got it. More brown.
Why am I even here?
848
00:48:33,703 --> 00:48:36,537
All right, everyone.
We gotta get this film finished. Let's go.
849
00:48:36,570 --> 00:48:38,537
- This is our first shot.
- Yeah. That's what I said.
850
00:48:38,570 --> 00:48:40,937
Finished, meaning one step
closer to the end. That's good.
851
00:48:40,970 --> 00:48:43,203
- Max, we need to have a safety meeting.
- Yeah, good idea.
852
00:48:43,237 --> 00:48:45,070
- Like now.
- Hey, Duke.
853
00:48:45,104 --> 00:48:47,872
- Yo!
- Yeah. We're gonna start filming now.
854
00:48:47,905 --> 00:48:49,671
You mind hopping on
old Butterscotch here?
855
00:48:49,704 --> 00:48:50,838
Be right there.
856
00:48:50,871 --> 00:48:52,771
Yeah.
857
00:48:53,904 --> 00:48:55,605
Okay.
858
00:48:56,938 --> 00:48:58,671
Whoa.
859
00:49:00,537 --> 00:49:03,270
- Where's Bob?
- Bob's not feeling so great today.
860
00:49:03,304 --> 00:49:05,805
But don't worry, he told me
everything we need to know.
861
00:49:10,204 --> 00:49:14,104
- Are you sure? Is that safe?
- Walter, are you questioning my professionalism,
862
00:49:14,137 --> 00:49:17,204
my dedication to my craft, which
hasn't seen an accident in over a year?
863
00:49:17,237 --> 00:49:19,838
- Our last film wrapped a year and a half ago.
- Irrelevant.
864
00:49:19,871 --> 00:49:22,104
And even if something were
to happen, which it won't,
865
00:49:22,136 --> 00:49:25,505
we have the best set medic in
Hollywood standing by right over there.
866
00:49:30,170 --> 00:49:31,638
Mattress.
867
00:49:44,136 --> 00:49:46,504
I'll ask you next time to get
all your facts straight
868
00:49:46,538 --> 00:49:49,037
before you attempt to slander
my good name, Walter.
869
00:49:49,069 --> 00:49:50,170
I'm sorry.
870
00:49:54,870 --> 00:49:57,570
Are you sure you're gonna
be able to do this stunt, Duke?
871
00:49:57,603 --> 00:50:00,037
Of course, he can do this stunt.
He's Duke Montana.
872
00:50:00,069 --> 00:50:01,505
I'll be fine.
873
00:50:03,671 --> 00:50:06,538
You know, you look pretty
handsome up there on that horse.
874
00:50:10,570 --> 00:50:12,103
Let's make a movie.
875
00:50:14,738 --> 00:50:17,971
Oh, shit. Hold up!
That's my horse!
876
00:50:18,004 --> 00:50:20,238
Everybody set to one.
Picture's up.
877
00:50:20,270 --> 00:50:23,971
- Megan, I have an idea, if I may suggest something.
- Sure, Max.
878
00:50:24,004 --> 00:50:28,570
I was thinking instead of just a simple jump,
why don't we make this look really spectacular.
879
00:50:28,603 --> 00:50:31,270
- I'm listening.
- Well, this being the first shot of our movie
880
00:50:31,303 --> 00:50:34,970
and our introduction to Duke, instead of him
just galloping along and jumping into frame,
881
00:50:35,003 --> 00:50:36,904
why don't we do it
through a wall of fire?
882
00:50:36,936 --> 00:50:39,604
Let's set the wagons ablaze and
have Duke and his beloved steed
883
00:50:39,637 --> 00:50:42,036
jump through the flames,
sail through the air
884
00:50:42,069 --> 00:50:45,103
and land right into a close-up
to save the settlers.
885
00:50:45,137 --> 00:50:48,605
- That sounds very dangerous.
- That sounds great.
886
00:50:48,637 --> 00:50:52,971
- Get those wagons lit.
- Great. Set them ablaze. That'll be some color.
887
00:50:53,004 --> 00:50:56,104
You sure we shouldn't talk to the
trainers about this? It's very dangerous.
888
00:50:56,136 --> 00:50:58,571
- No, we don't need to do that.
- Usually you rehearse...
889
00:50:58,604 --> 00:51:01,070
Walter, Walter, for the last
time, I know what I'm doing.
890
00:51:01,104 --> 00:51:02,971
Stop fucking bothering me.
891
00:51:09,670 --> 00:51:13,538
Ready and action.
892
00:52:19,003 --> 00:52:20,803
Duke! Medic!
893
00:52:20,836 --> 00:52:24,870
Awful hand of fate that
has dealt us these cards.
894
00:52:24,904 --> 00:52:27,803
I can see it now
in the obituary in Variety,
895
00:52:27,836 --> 00:52:30,904
"Duke Montana,
he died with his boots on."
896
00:52:30,936 --> 00:52:33,505
If he were alive right now,
I know he would be saying...
897
00:52:33,538 --> 00:52:35,537
Where's that damn horse at?
898
00:52:37,236 --> 00:52:41,004
- Duke? My God, you're alive.
- There you are.
899
00:52:41,037 --> 00:52:45,103
If I come off you again, me and you
is fixin' to have some fisticuffs.
900
00:52:45,136 --> 00:52:46,937
Is that clear?
901
00:52:46,969 --> 00:52:50,604
All right then, let's do this again.
Wardrobe.
902
00:52:50,638 --> 00:52:52,738
- Try to stay handy, will you?
- Duke, are you sure?
903
00:52:52,769 --> 00:52:56,504
Oh, hell, yes. I'm sure. I just
need to talk to my director.
904
00:52:56,538 --> 00:52:57,936
Mm-hmm.
905
00:52:57,969 --> 00:53:00,270
Oh, my God.
That was so close.
906
00:53:00,304 --> 00:53:02,770
Yeah. That was close.
That could've been a big tragedy.
907
00:53:02,803 --> 00:53:04,937
We could've had a big tragedy.
908
00:53:04,969 --> 00:53:07,936
- We're so lucky.
- Yeah, we are lucky. Yeah.
909
00:53:07,970 --> 00:53:09,770
Reset. Let's go again.
910
00:53:09,803 --> 00:53:13,472
- Back to one.
- And action!
911
00:53:59,638 --> 00:54:00,937
Cut!
912
00:54:00,969 --> 00:54:03,504
Perfect. Great.
913
00:54:03,538 --> 00:54:04,904
Moving on.
914
00:54:08,037 --> 00:54:11,904
Shouldn't we just get one more for safety?
For protection?
915
00:54:11,937 --> 00:54:16,637
And maybe we should set up an even bigger,
bigger fire, to make it more effective.
916
00:54:16,670 --> 00:54:19,703
- We can at least try that.
- I like what I got. We're moving.
917
00:54:19,737 --> 00:54:22,837
- You know, I'm really starting to like her. She's very decisive.
- Hey, Duke.
918
00:54:22,870 --> 00:54:26,004
Hey, Duke. Duke, great job up there.
I like what you're doing.
919
00:54:26,037 --> 00:54:30,238
Can I get you anything, like, uh...
like a root beer with sassafras?
920
00:54:32,669 --> 00:54:35,604
No, sir, I don't care
for root beer.
921
00:54:35,638 --> 00:54:37,670
How about something for lunch?
How about lentil soup?
922
00:54:37,702 --> 00:54:39,771
Oh, that'd be swell.
I like lentil soup.
923
00:54:40,969 --> 00:54:43,170
- Now, how about pumpkin?
- Oh.
924
00:54:45,570 --> 00:54:48,171
With lentils?
No, thank you, sir.
925
00:54:51,803 --> 00:54:53,504
What do you look
so happy about?
926
00:54:59,104 --> 00:55:03,572
Rode... rodent?
Rhap... rhapsody?
927
00:55:07,970 --> 00:55:10,605
Rotor, runner? Rhubarb?
928
00:55:26,169 --> 00:55:30,205
Jesus, Uncle Max. Are you okay?
You took off like a rocket.
929
00:55:37,136 --> 00:55:42,238
My horse, my Butterscotch,
just like that, gone?
930
00:55:42,271 --> 00:55:44,838
That horse looked up to me
like I was his father.
931
00:55:46,236 --> 00:55:48,270
And I looked at him
like he was my son.
932
00:55:48,303 --> 00:55:50,769
Oh, don't worry, Bob.
We're insured.
933
00:55:50,803 --> 00:55:54,704
Insured? Did you realize
my horse is priceless?
934
00:55:54,736 --> 00:55:58,170
And I'm gonna sue you,
and I'm gonna sue you,
935
00:55:58,204 --> 00:56:02,204
and whoever else is responsible
in financing this debacle,
936
00:56:02,236 --> 00:56:04,070
for every penny you're worth.
937
00:56:09,802 --> 00:56:12,538
What's his problem?
938
00:56:12,569 --> 00:56:14,569
I don't know.
939
00:56:14,602 --> 00:56:17,736
You know, on the bright side,
this is one of our best first days ever.
940
00:56:17,769 --> 00:56:21,538
Best? Best?
What are you talking about?
941
00:56:21,569 --> 00:56:25,003
I mean, we lost our featured
horse, we're getting sued,
942
00:56:25,036 --> 00:56:28,170
- I got ejected from my own feet, Duke Montana's still...
- Still what?
943
00:56:28,203 --> 00:56:31,569
Still as good as ever?
Because he was incredible today.
944
00:56:31,603 --> 00:56:33,270
And Megan said she got
some fantastic stuff.
945
00:56:33,303 --> 00:56:35,703
- What the hell does she know?
- I have no idea.
946
00:56:35,737 --> 00:56:38,636
You're the one that wanted to hire her but she's our director.
947
00:56:38,670 --> 00:56:41,804
I'm not talking to anybody.
You hear me? Nobody.
948
00:56:41,836 --> 00:56:43,669
I don't care
if it's Christ on a cross.
949
00:56:43,703 --> 00:56:45,204
- Nobody.
- I'll get it.
950
00:56:45,237 --> 00:56:47,171
Hello.
951
00:56:47,204 --> 00:56:49,704
- It's Reggie Fontaine.
- Give me the phone.
952
00:56:49,737 --> 00:56:51,037
Hey, Reggie.
953
00:56:51,069 --> 00:56:52,870
How are you?
954
00:56:52,904 --> 00:56:54,238
Thanks for calling.
955
00:56:54,271 --> 00:56:58,537
So the cowboy... dead, right?
956
00:56:58,569 --> 00:57:02,769
- Yeah. Uh, no. Well, not...
- Wait. What do you mean no?
957
00:57:02,802 --> 00:57:05,536
You said, "Dead."
You said, "Dead by noon."
958
00:57:05,569 --> 00:57:08,836
Dead. Like William Holden
in Sunset Boulevard.
959
00:57:08,870 --> 00:57:12,937
Well, he's doing... he's doing
great actually today, yeah.
960
00:57:12,970 --> 00:57:15,669
I mean, you should've seen him.
He was, like, amazing.
961
00:57:15,702 --> 00:57:17,803
Jumping the horse
like he was only 50.
962
00:57:17,836 --> 00:57:19,970
It was really...
really something to see.
963
00:57:20,004 --> 00:57:21,971
I don't wanna hear that shit!
964
00:57:22,004 --> 00:57:24,004
I wanna hear that
he died tragically.
965
00:57:24,036 --> 00:57:26,604
We're gonna make that happen,
Reggie. Wait and see.
966
00:57:26,637 --> 00:57:29,136
Tomorrow, we're shooting this
fantastic rope bridge scene.
967
00:57:29,169 --> 00:57:31,536
I mean, you've never seen
a chasm this deep.
968
00:57:31,570 --> 00:57:35,237
I... I mean, it's... it's gonna be
a real killer. Wait till you see.
969
00:57:35,270 --> 00:57:39,036
It better be, because if not,
I'm gonna hunt you down.
970
00:57:39,070 --> 00:57:42,570
I'll hunt you down like Lefors
did Newman and Redford
971
00:57:42,603 --> 00:57:45,204
in Butch Cassidy and The Sundance Kid.
Do you hear me?
972
00:57:47,802 --> 00:57:51,970
Thank you, Reggie. Thank you. And again,
thanks for the call. It was very nice of you.
973
00:57:52,003 --> 00:57:55,704
Reggie, I told you I never
trusted that motherfucker.
974
00:58:00,104 --> 00:58:02,203
What a sport.
975
00:58:02,236 --> 00:58:04,669
Why the hell is
Reggie Fontaine calling you?
976
00:58:04,702 --> 00:58:07,936
- What?
- Why is Reggie Fontaine calling you?
977
00:58:07,969 --> 00:58:09,970
I don't think
I like your tone.
978
00:58:10,003 --> 00:58:12,937
Well, I'm sorry,
but I wanna know why he's calling you.
979
00:58:12,969 --> 00:58:15,803
- Well, what do you think?
- I have no idea. That's why I'm asking.
980
00:58:15,836 --> 00:58:19,170
I'll tell you why, because the
word must already be out there.
981
00:58:19,204 --> 00:58:22,570
- What word?
- The word that every producer
982
00:58:22,602 --> 00:58:26,636
wants to hear being said about their
movie on the first day of production.
983
00:58:26,669 --> 00:58:29,070
- I have no idea. What's the friggin' word?
- Hit.
984
00:58:29,104 --> 00:58:31,171
- No.
- Yes, Walter. Hit.
985
00:58:32,037 --> 00:58:34,104
- And that's what we've got.
- Really?
986
00:58:34,137 --> 00:58:36,737
A hit.
It's already on the street.
987
00:58:36,770 --> 00:58:39,504
Already on the lips
of people in the know.
988
00:58:39,537 --> 00:58:43,204
Being whispered like the wind
in every corner of Tinsel Town.
989
00:58:43,236 --> 00:58:45,670
And it's obvious
that Mr. Fontaine
990
00:58:45,703 --> 00:58:48,504
is trying to work his way
back into my good graces.
991
00:58:48,537 --> 00:58:50,204
But you heard what I said.
I was nice to him,
992
00:58:50,237 --> 00:58:52,238
but I really was telling him
to go fuck himself.
993
00:58:52,271 --> 00:58:54,503
Yes!
994
00:58:54,536 --> 00:58:59,103
A hit. I knew it. I was feeling it.
Oh, I'm so proud of you.
995
00:58:59,137 --> 00:59:02,205
Oh, I have to be honest. I thought
you were up to something shady again.
996
00:59:03,236 --> 00:59:05,003
I'll forgive you
this time, Walter.
997
00:59:05,037 --> 00:59:06,471
Thank you.
998
00:59:52,703 --> 00:59:54,238
We're just waiting
on the star talent.
999
00:59:54,270 --> 00:59:55,971
So you're gonna have
to hang in there,
1000
00:59:56,004 --> 00:59:57,737
but we're gonna
get to you soon.
1001
00:59:59,037 --> 01:00:00,570
Great job on the bridge.
1002
01:00:00,602 --> 01:00:02,836
Sure. More brown.
1003
01:00:02,870 --> 01:00:04,871
No. It's beautiful.
1004
01:00:04,904 --> 01:00:07,604
I'm sorry. I'm actually
seeing someone else right now.
1005
01:00:09,970 --> 01:00:11,770
Hey, can I talk
to you fellas for a minute?
1006
01:00:11,803 --> 01:00:13,636
Sure, Duke.
What can we do for you?
1007
01:00:13,669 --> 01:00:15,936
I'm not too sure
how to say this.
1008
01:00:15,969 --> 01:00:18,704
- Duke, you can tell us anything, so...
- All right, then.
1009
01:00:18,736 --> 01:00:22,504
Okay. I really don't wanna
get out there on that bridge.
1010
01:00:22,537 --> 01:00:26,636
Oh, but, Duke, this is the
scene where you cross the gorge
1011
01:00:26,669 --> 01:00:29,270
into the sacred and forbidden
Indian burial ground,
1012
01:00:29,303 --> 01:00:32,504
where you awaken the spirit
of your great-grandfather,
1013
01:00:32,536 --> 01:00:34,670
therefore revealing to your
character and the audience
1014
01:00:34,702 --> 01:00:36,936
that you're actually
one-eighth Indian.
1015
01:00:36,970 --> 01:00:39,704
I don't care why I'm crossing the
goddamn gorge. I don't like heights.
1016
01:00:39,737 --> 01:00:42,837
The great Duke Montana
doesn't like heights? Oh.
1017
01:00:42,870 --> 01:00:45,804
That right there is the reason I
don't ever tell anybody about it.
1018
01:00:45,836 --> 01:00:49,936
But, Duke, look, if we're to get this
incredibly poignant and important scene,
1019
01:00:49,970 --> 01:00:53,504
the one that would win you your
Academy Award, if you want that,
1020
01:00:53,537 --> 01:00:57,971
and I know you do, there's no way
that you can't cross that bridge.
1021
01:00:58,004 --> 01:01:01,238
- You have to cross that bridge.
- That's easy enough to say from where you're standing.
1022
01:01:01,271 --> 01:01:04,569
I'll see you fellas when you find a new
way for me to reach the burial ground.
1023
01:01:04,602 --> 01:01:06,836
Perhaps a little liquid courage would help?
What do you think?
1024
01:01:06,870 --> 01:01:08,603
- No.
- You sure?
1025
01:01:08,636 --> 01:01:11,603
- No.
- Uh, you know what, Duke? You're right.
1026
01:01:11,636 --> 01:01:14,470
It is easy to say from where
we're standing, but look.
1027
01:01:16,170 --> 01:01:18,570
Hey, Walter.
Walter, what are you doing?
1028
01:01:18,602 --> 01:01:20,870
- Don't worry, Uncle Max.
- Well, yeah. But what are you doing?
1029
01:01:20,903 --> 01:01:24,003
- Don't worry.
- Walter. Walter.
1030
01:01:24,037 --> 01:01:26,637
See? Duke, it's perfectly safe.
1031
01:01:26,670 --> 01:01:30,171
Sure, when you're that close to solid
ground, but what about out in the middle?
1032
01:01:31,370 --> 01:01:34,704
- All right.
- Oh, no, no. Is this... Is this really necessary?
1033
01:01:34,737 --> 01:01:38,170
- It's okay. It's okay, Uncle Max.
- Is this really necessary?
1034
01:01:38,203 --> 01:01:41,503
- It's... It's good. Look.
- I like a man who puts his money where his mouth is.
1035
01:01:41,536 --> 01:01:44,036
- Well...
- Are you convinced it's safe now, Duke? Look.
1036
01:01:44,070 --> 01:01:45,770
No, how about
a little bit further out?
1037
01:01:45,803 --> 01:01:47,504
Oh, okay.
1038
01:01:49,236 --> 01:01:50,903
No, no, no. Walter. Walter.
1039
01:01:52,004 --> 01:01:53,571
Walter.
1040
01:01:54,235 --> 01:01:55,569
Now?
1041
01:01:55,603 --> 01:01:58,171
No. Get further
on out there.
1042
01:01:58,836 --> 01:02:02,569
Walter!
Walter. Enough. Stop.
1043
01:02:02,602 --> 01:02:05,070
The scene is not worth it.
Come back.
1044
01:02:05,103 --> 01:02:09,003
It's okay, Uncle Max. It doesn't matter.
We can't shut down.
1045
01:02:09,036 --> 01:02:13,236
We're making the greatest movie ever.
It's totally fine.
1046
01:02:16,036 --> 01:02:20,703
That is the kind of passion and commitment
to a project that gets my blood rolling.
1047
01:02:20,736 --> 01:02:23,836
You have yourself a scene,
Mr. Barber.
1048
01:02:23,869 --> 01:02:25,536
You got this, Duke.
1049
01:02:27,103 --> 01:02:29,503
Okay. Okay.
1050
01:02:29,537 --> 01:02:30,970
Let's shoot.
1051
01:02:32,136 --> 01:02:33,736
Rolling.
1052
01:02:33,770 --> 01:02:35,936
And action!
1053
01:03:16,070 --> 01:03:18,637
- This is gonna be great. Watch this.
- Oh, no.
1054
01:03:21,602 --> 01:03:24,471
- What are you talking about? This is great.
- No, yeah. No, yeah, sure.
1055
01:03:38,536 --> 01:03:40,870
And cut. Reset.
1056
01:03:40,904 --> 01:03:42,004
Let's go again.
1057
01:03:42,037 --> 01:03:45,737
Back to one.
1058
01:03:45,770 --> 01:03:49,804
- Hurry up, people.
- Listen to the lady director.
1059
01:03:51,636 --> 01:03:53,003
Mach schnell.
1060
01:03:53,037 --> 01:03:54,636
Come on.
1061
01:04:00,904 --> 01:04:03,136
Hey, I think I'm over
my fear of heights.
1062
01:04:03,169 --> 01:04:05,604
- Yeah, Duke.
- That's great, Duke!
1063
01:04:05,636 --> 01:04:09,971
Duke Montana
is not afraid of heights.
1064
01:04:11,670 --> 01:04:13,004
Run!
1065
01:04:13,037 --> 01:04:16,037
- Roll the fucking camera.
- Yes, yes, perfect.
1066
01:04:16,070 --> 01:04:17,938
Everybody clear the bridge.
1067
01:04:27,136 --> 01:04:30,504
- Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
- Duke.
1068
01:04:32,236 --> 01:04:33,471
Yeah, do it.
1069
01:05:00,603 --> 01:05:01,703
Yeah!
1070
01:05:01,736 --> 01:05:04,103
- Yeah, Duke Montana!
- Cut it!
1071
01:05:06,168 --> 01:05:07,536
I know. I know.
1072
01:05:07,569 --> 01:05:09,536
Did you get it?
Tell me you got it.
1073
01:05:09,569 --> 01:05:11,135
You got it?
You got it? Yes! Oh!
1074
01:05:11,168 --> 01:05:14,571
Duke Montana, everybody!
Duke Montana!
1075
01:05:19,970 --> 01:05:21,471
Good job, Duke.
1076
01:05:22,838 --> 01:05:27,237
Hi, I'm Duke Montana and I'm here to
talk to you about my good friend...
1077
01:05:29,570 --> 01:05:32,537
...from the Rio Grande
to the Rocky Mountains...
1078
01:05:34,103 --> 01:05:36,904
- Hello?
- Who the fuck is Butterscotch?
1079
01:05:37,637 --> 01:05:42,804
- What?
- Who the fuck is Butterscotch?
1080
01:05:43,870 --> 01:05:45,937
Uh, he's a horse.
1081
01:05:45,969 --> 01:05:48,002
I'm being sued
for a million dollars
1082
01:05:48,035 --> 01:05:50,537
because you lost a fucking
horse named Butterscotch?
1083
01:05:50,569 --> 01:05:53,269
No, no. No, we'll find him.
We'll find him.
1084
01:05:53,302 --> 01:05:55,269
You're goddamn right
you'll find him.
1085
01:05:55,303 --> 01:05:56,971
And what about
the fucking cowboy?
1086
01:05:57,002 --> 01:05:59,102
No, let me guess.
Not dead.
1087
01:06:00,135 --> 01:06:02,168
No. No.
1088
01:06:02,202 --> 01:06:03,670
Max...
1089
01:06:05,904 --> 01:06:07,737
if you're fucking
around with me...
1090
01:06:08,736 --> 01:06:10,569
I swear before God, Max,
1091
01:06:10,602 --> 01:06:13,503
I'm gonna throw your ass
off a roof.
1092
01:06:13,537 --> 01:06:16,270
Reggie, I... I promise you,
I'm doing my best.
1093
01:06:16,302 --> 01:06:18,970
It's not that hard
to kill somebody!
1094
01:06:19,002 --> 01:06:20,603
Oh, no, but you
don't know this guy.
1095
01:06:20,637 --> 01:06:21,904
He's got like
nine lives, Reggie.
1096
01:06:21,937 --> 01:06:23,103
Shoot him.
1097
01:06:23,670 --> 01:06:25,604
Strangle him. Poison him.
1098
01:06:25,636 --> 01:06:28,769
I don't give a fuck
how you do it, but do it!
1099
01:06:28,803 --> 01:06:31,170
If not, I'm gonna come up there
and do it myself.
1100
01:06:31,202 --> 01:06:33,637
And when I'm done with him,
I'll be starting on you.
1101
01:06:33,669 --> 01:06:35,838
Yeah, yeah.
Ah, yeah, yeah.
1102
01:06:40,302 --> 01:06:42,736
This motherfucker
hung up on me.
1103
01:06:54,869 --> 01:06:57,969
From Hollywood,
The Tonight Show...
1104
01:07:03,802 --> 01:07:05,136
Hey.
1105
01:07:05,168 --> 01:07:07,170
Oh, look who's here.
1106
01:07:07,202 --> 01:07:11,604
Butterscotch,
so happy to see you.
1107
01:07:11,637 --> 01:07:13,270
Come on, come on.
You wanna watch the show?
1108
01:07:13,303 --> 01:07:16,537
Rodney Dangerfield,
Dr. Joyce Brothers.
1109
01:07:16,570 --> 01:07:17,936
Anthony Newley.
1110
01:07:17,969 --> 01:07:20,669
♪ What kind of fool am I? ♪
1111
01:07:20,702 --> 01:07:23,970
It's okay, come on.
You can... Come on...
1112
01:07:24,704 --> 01:07:26,803
What are you thinking?
1113
01:07:26,837 --> 01:07:28,604
...Joey Bishop.
1114
01:07:28,636 --> 01:07:31,003
Oh, he's good too.
You're gonna enjoy him. Come on.
1115
01:07:31,035 --> 01:07:33,871
- Here's... Joey!
- What?
1116
01:07:36,636 --> 01:07:38,935
Fuck you, Butterscotch.
1117
01:07:46,636 --> 01:07:50,203
There you go. Nice horse.
That's it.
1118
01:07:51,902 --> 01:07:56,803
That's it. That's it.
Good horsey.
1119
01:08:05,669 --> 01:08:09,202
Hey, thanks for coming back,
Bob. I really appreciate it.
1120
01:08:09,236 --> 01:08:11,936
Oh, yeah?
Well, I'm still suing you.
1121
01:08:11,969 --> 01:08:14,036
Well, yeah.
Do what you got to do, okay.
1122
01:08:14,068 --> 01:08:16,203
So tell me about
old Mordecai here.
1123
01:08:16,235 --> 01:08:19,169
Mordecai come from a very long,
prestigious line of bulls.
1124
01:08:24,935 --> 01:08:27,503
- Do you realize who his great-grandfather was?
- No.
1125
01:08:27,536 --> 01:08:29,569
"El Jefe" Jose Gonzales.
1126
01:08:29,602 --> 01:08:31,870
- Oh.
- Oh, yeah, and he's a bad son of a bitch.
1127
01:08:31,902 --> 01:08:33,935
- Really?
- Oh, yeah.
1128
01:08:33,969 --> 01:08:36,269
Killed 14 of them damn matadors
in less than three weeks.
1129
01:08:36,303 --> 01:08:38,903
That's right, 15.
1130
01:08:38,935 --> 01:08:42,669
So Mordecai charges whenever
he sees the color red?
1131
01:08:42,703 --> 01:08:46,536
Jesus Christ! Come here.
1132
01:08:46,570 --> 01:08:50,203
Don't ever let me hear you say that word
around him again, you understand me?
1133
01:08:50,236 --> 01:08:52,770
I'm the only one here that
can control that big bastard.
1134
01:08:52,801 --> 01:08:55,970
He goes ballistic and crazy
if he just sees that color.
1135
01:08:56,002 --> 01:08:58,135
And you need to tell
your crew, if you haven't.
1136
01:08:58,169 --> 01:09:01,270
Well, oh, yeah. I told everybody
to steer clear of Mordecai here.
1137
01:09:01,302 --> 01:09:04,236
- Well, that's good.
- What's the story on this bull?
1138
01:09:04,270 --> 01:09:07,637
Excuse me. Excuse me.
Well, Duke, this is the scene
1139
01:09:07,670 --> 01:09:10,737
where the cowboys fight the Indians
over the bull that they stole from you.
1140
01:09:10,769 --> 01:09:13,236
I know what the scene is about.
It just doesn't make any sense.
1141
01:09:13,270 --> 01:09:16,704
Why in the world would an
Indian steal a white man's bull
1142
01:09:16,737 --> 01:09:18,903
when there's three million
buffalo standing out there?
1143
01:09:18,935 --> 01:09:22,035
That's a good point.
But let's just focus on today's work.
1144
01:09:22,069 --> 01:09:25,036
- Can we do that?
- Okay, fine. Tell me about the bull that don't make any sense.
1145
01:09:25,068 --> 01:09:28,170
Well, no, he's a stunt bull.
He looks mean, but he wouldn't hurt a fly.
1146
01:09:28,202 --> 01:09:29,802
- Sounds hanky.
- Hanky?
1147
01:09:29,835 --> 01:09:31,270
As in ridiculous.
1148
01:09:31,302 --> 01:09:33,236
Uh, no, no,
it's the newest thing, Duke.
1149
01:09:33,269 --> 01:09:35,869
You've been out of the
business for a long time.
1150
01:09:35,903 --> 01:09:38,936
Believe me, Duke,
this is state-of-the-art.
1151
01:09:38,968 --> 01:09:42,802
By the way, where's that big, beautiful,
bright red hat that I gave you?
1152
01:09:42,835 --> 01:09:46,170
I like my hat. I gave the red one
to that little kid down there.
1153
01:09:46,202 --> 01:09:47,670
What? What kid?
1154
01:09:48,337 --> 01:09:51,069
- Walter. Walter. Walter.
- Yes.
1155
01:09:51,103 --> 01:09:53,769
- What's with the kid?
- Oh, Megan had a great idea this morning.
1156
01:09:53,801 --> 01:09:55,703
Instead of Duke just
facing off the bull,
1157
01:09:55,736 --> 01:09:58,471
first, he's gonna go rescue
that little boy named Lyle.
1158
01:09:59,569 --> 01:10:01,070
- What?
- Isn't that exciting?
1159
01:10:01,102 --> 01:10:03,002
No. It's...
Why didn't you tell me this?
1160
01:10:03,035 --> 01:10:04,969
Oh, it's gonna be great.
You're gonna love it.
1161
01:10:05,003 --> 01:10:06,536
First positions.
1162
01:10:06,570 --> 01:10:07,770
Looking good, Lyle.
1163
01:10:09,636 --> 01:10:10,837
Rolling.
1164
01:10:14,702 --> 01:10:17,902
Ready and action.
1165
01:10:21,168 --> 01:10:23,969
And action, Duke.
1166
01:10:28,135 --> 01:10:31,237
Get up there. Come on.
1167
01:10:31,269 --> 01:10:33,203
Gosh dang,
what's the matter with you?
1168
01:10:37,270 --> 01:10:38,671
Whoa.
1169
01:10:39,537 --> 01:10:40,702
Shit.
1170
01:10:45,637 --> 01:10:47,935
Harriet. No, no, no, no!
1171
01:10:49,569 --> 01:10:52,903
Harriet, no, no. No! No!
1172
01:10:57,168 --> 01:10:58,536
No, don't!
1173
01:11:13,637 --> 01:11:17,036
Hey, look!
Butterscotch. Whoo!
1174
01:11:54,537 --> 01:11:57,269
Stunt bull, my ass.
1175
01:11:57,303 --> 01:11:59,204
Get on out of here.
1176
01:12:00,168 --> 01:12:01,636
And cut!
1177
01:12:01,669 --> 01:12:02,970
Yeah!
1178
01:12:03,003 --> 01:12:04,970
Hey, Mr. Barber,
can I get you anything?
1179
01:12:10,636 --> 01:12:12,837
Ooh!
1180
01:12:15,003 --> 01:12:17,803
Wow, Uncle Max, you sure
are light on your feet.
1181
01:12:17,836 --> 01:12:20,636
I gotta tell you,
you almost dodged that bull.
1182
01:12:20,668 --> 01:12:22,503
Yeah.
1183
01:12:22,537 --> 01:12:25,203
Lie down. Put your feet up.
1184
01:12:25,235 --> 01:12:27,069
Fucking thing looked like Satan.
1185
01:12:27,103 --> 01:12:29,570
On the bright side,
Butterscotch coming back
1186
01:12:29,601 --> 01:12:31,237
is something we never
could have planned.
1187
01:12:31,269 --> 01:12:33,935
And I was thinking,
it totally encapsulates
1188
01:12:33,968 --> 01:12:37,703
the heroic nature of Duke and
the Indians and the townspeople.
1189
01:12:37,735 --> 01:12:40,602
And even Megan said it's some
of the best stuff we've gotten.
1190
01:12:40,635 --> 01:12:42,935
Yeah. Fucking fabulous.
1191
01:12:42,968 --> 01:12:46,636
There's a note here from Reggie Fontaine.
Don't worry, it's more good news.
1192
01:12:46,668 --> 01:12:48,668
He says, uh, he's gonna
come to set tomorrow
1193
01:12:48,702 --> 01:12:52,569
to make sure we end up on
the front page of the trades.
1194
01:12:52,601 --> 01:12:55,636
Can you believe that?
He sure is nice to go out of his way
1195
01:12:55,668 --> 01:12:57,902
to help out on a movie
he's not even involved in.
1196
01:13:06,069 --> 01:13:08,803
Duke, whatever happened to you?
1197
01:13:08,835 --> 01:13:12,869
Oh, I don't know.
I think I'd rather not talk about it.
1198
01:13:13,735 --> 01:13:17,137
But you know what?
I'd really like to know.
1199
01:13:18,702 --> 01:13:21,036
If all my years
have taught me anything,
1200
01:13:21,068 --> 01:13:23,869
it's that you have to be
what you are.
1201
01:13:25,701 --> 01:13:27,903
With no apology.
1202
01:13:30,303 --> 01:13:32,703
Even when there
ain't no role to play.
1203
01:13:58,203 --> 01:14:00,471
All I want to do is make movies.
1204
01:14:15,569 --> 01:14:18,002
- Fuck you. You should be dead now.
- Uncle Max.
1205
01:14:18,036 --> 01:14:20,835
No matter what you think you saw,
I was not talking to that horse.
1206
01:14:20,869 --> 01:14:23,536
What? Come here.
I've got to show you something.
1207
01:14:23,568 --> 01:14:26,869
You're not gonna believe this. Just
come with me. I got a surprise for you.
1208
01:14:26,903 --> 01:14:28,803
You gotta see this.
1209
01:14:30,203 --> 01:14:32,103
Come here.
1210
01:14:32,135 --> 01:14:35,202
Walter, I have absolutely no
interest whatsoever in seeing...
1211
01:14:35,235 --> 01:14:37,202
Start it up.
Just trust me. Start it up.
1212
01:14:42,802 --> 01:14:45,070
- Oh, my God.
- I know, Uncle Max.
1213
01:14:47,136 --> 01:14:49,568
Walter, oh, my God.
1214
01:14:49,602 --> 01:14:51,469
I know, Uncle Max.
1215
01:14:53,935 --> 01:14:56,003
- Did you see what he...
- It's incredible.
1216
01:14:56,035 --> 01:14:59,668
- Oh, my God.
- I know, Uncle Max.
1217
01:14:59,701 --> 01:15:01,970
Walter!
1218
01:15:02,002 --> 01:15:04,835
I mean, it's a hit.
It's a bona fide hit.
1219
01:15:04,869 --> 01:15:07,970
- Yeah.
- It's wonderful. It's breathtaking.
1220
01:15:08,002 --> 01:15:10,903
Duke Montana, he's... he's...
1221
01:15:10,935 --> 01:15:14,802
I've never seen him look
virile, more alive. My God.
1222
01:15:14,836 --> 01:15:17,870
- Oh, my God, oh!
- What? What?
1223
01:15:17,902 --> 01:15:20,603
Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
Oh, my God. Duke! Duke.
1224
01:15:20,635 --> 01:15:22,602
Harriet, where's Duke?
Where's Duke?
1225
01:15:22,636 --> 01:15:25,103
- I don't know, Mr. Barber. I think he went to his trailer.
- Duke!
1226
01:15:25,135 --> 01:15:27,970
- What's going on?
- Stay over there. Stay there. Stay back. Stay back.
1227
01:15:28,003 --> 01:15:33,636
Duke? Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
Duke, where are you? Duke? Duke!
1228
01:15:33,668 --> 01:15:35,870
Yo.
1229
01:15:35,902 --> 01:15:40,636
Hey! There you are.
I wanted to ask you something.
1230
01:15:40,669 --> 01:15:44,003
Whoa!
1231
01:15:53,636 --> 01:15:56,803
You've been trying
to kill Duke Montana.
1232
01:15:56,836 --> 01:15:59,503
- What?
- You heard me.
1233
01:16:00,868 --> 01:16:02,535
Who are you?
1234
01:16:02,569 --> 01:16:06,503
You don't have amnesia,
you lying son of a bitch.
1235
01:16:06,535 --> 01:16:09,768
Is that how you talk to your own flesh
and blood who's just coming out of a coma?
1236
01:16:09,801 --> 01:16:11,768
- A coma?
- Ow.
1237
01:16:11,802 --> 01:16:13,936
You've only been out
three hours.
1238
01:16:13,969 --> 01:16:16,036
You never had any intention
of making a great movie.
1239
01:16:16,068 --> 01:16:18,568
You are incapable
of making a great movie.
1240
01:16:18,602 --> 01:16:21,503
You just wanted to take the easy way
out and cash in on the insurance.
1241
01:16:21,535 --> 01:16:23,803
And that's why you invested
your own money.
1242
01:16:23,835 --> 01:16:26,802
Just the idea that you were never
even gonna tell me any of this!
1243
01:16:26,836 --> 01:16:29,170
- Well, I didn't think you'd approve.
- Of course, I don't approve.
1244
01:16:29,202 --> 01:16:31,836
You see? Keeping you in the dark
was the best thing for all of us.
1245
01:16:31,868 --> 01:16:33,535
- Not Duke.
- Duke?
1246
01:16:33,568 --> 01:16:35,735
Duke had a gun in his mouth
when we met him.
1247
01:16:35,769 --> 01:16:39,203
He wanted to die. We gave him the greatest
gift of all... the will to live again.
1248
01:16:39,236 --> 01:16:43,003
And besides, you know what?
This is really all your fault.
1249
01:16:43,035 --> 01:16:45,535
- What?
- You're the one who killed Frank Pierce.
1250
01:16:45,568 --> 01:16:47,602
You're the one who
wanted to go on the set,
1251
01:16:47,636 --> 01:16:50,069
and you're the one that put that
idea in my head in the first place.
1252
01:16:50,103 --> 01:16:53,603
Your ability to twist things
around is incredible.
1253
01:16:53,636 --> 01:16:57,870
How you can just... You... You...
You cherry pick information
1254
01:16:57,903 --> 01:17:00,803
and you just mold it
into whatever you want.
1255
01:17:00,835 --> 01:17:02,802
It's truly incredible.
How do you do it?
1256
01:17:02,836 --> 01:17:07,236
I got to know because you make...
you make greed seem palatable.
1257
01:17:07,270 --> 01:17:11,769
You make murder seem just,
you know, it's swell.
1258
01:17:11,801 --> 01:17:14,135
What kind of
a human being are you?
1259
01:17:14,169 --> 01:17:16,970
Well, I'm a producer, Walter.
That's my gift.
1260
01:17:17,002 --> 01:17:19,769
You know what? You're nothing more
than a garden-variety psychopath.
1261
01:17:19,802 --> 01:17:23,036
I mean, that... that is
finally becoming clear to me.
1262
01:17:23,068 --> 01:17:26,902
My God, gambling on this insanity with...
with your own money is
1263
01:17:26,936 --> 01:17:30,469
the only quasi-respectable thing
you've done this entire shoot.
1264
01:17:37,968 --> 01:17:40,036
You're not gambling
with your own money?
1265
01:17:41,403 --> 01:17:44,803
Oh, please tell me you didn't get us
into bed with Reggie Fontaine again.
1266
01:17:46,235 --> 01:17:49,202
- Oh, my God!
- That's my line.
1267
01:17:49,236 --> 01:17:52,536
What happened to all the money you got
from selling Paradise to Jimmy Moore?
1268
01:17:52,568 --> 01:17:55,635
I never signed that contract.
I told him to go fuck himself.
1269
01:17:55,668 --> 01:17:58,003
- Why would you do that?
- Why would I do that?
1270
01:17:58,036 --> 01:18:00,736
He doesn't deserve that script.
He's beneath that script.
1271
01:18:00,769 --> 01:18:02,870
I'll never let him
have that script.
1272
01:18:02,902 --> 01:18:05,935
I'd take that script to my grave before
I would let him have that script.
1273
01:18:05,969 --> 01:18:08,703
- Are you kidding me?
- You are an insane person.
1274
01:18:08,735 --> 01:18:10,902
Fine, Walter, sticks and stones.
Call me whatever you want.
1275
01:18:10,935 --> 01:18:13,035
But we need to protect
our movie right now.
1276
01:18:13,069 --> 01:18:16,170
We are on the precipice of
greatness, of cinematic glory,
1277
01:18:16,202 --> 01:18:19,536
or dare I say it,
Academy Awards.
1278
01:18:19,568 --> 01:18:21,602
There's only one thing
stopping us now.
1279
01:18:22,802 --> 01:18:25,869
That Reggie Fontaine is on his
way to kill Duke Montana himself.
1280
01:18:25,902 --> 01:18:27,869
And possibly you and me.
1281
01:18:28,702 --> 01:18:30,902
Help me find my shoes.
Where are they?
1282
01:18:38,535 --> 01:18:40,268
What are you doing there,
Sheriff?
1283
01:18:40,301 --> 01:18:43,169
- Afraid I can't let you into town.
- And why is that?
1284
01:18:43,202 --> 01:18:47,735
Anyone siding with the Injuns
ain't welcome here.
1285
01:18:47,768 --> 01:18:50,635
That's where you got
things wrong, Sheriff.
1286
01:18:50,669 --> 01:18:54,003
I ain't on the side of the Indians.
I'm on the side of right.
1287
01:19:06,003 --> 01:19:09,202
You know this is
where they shot Gunga Din?
1288
01:19:09,235 --> 01:19:11,703
- Who's Gunga Din?
- And why did they shoot him?
1289
01:19:13,036 --> 01:19:14,137
Never mind.
1290
01:19:15,535 --> 01:19:17,170
How you wanna do this, boss?
1291
01:19:18,135 --> 01:19:19,469
Publicly.
1292
01:19:21,903 --> 01:19:23,137
It's your move, Sheriff.
1293
01:19:38,301 --> 01:19:40,503
Go get Duke and meet me
at the drive-in.
1294
01:19:40,536 --> 01:19:41,770
- Drive-in?
- Yeah, trust me.
1295
01:19:45,068 --> 01:19:49,836
You don't want any Indians in here, you better
be reaching for that hogleg on your hip.
1296
01:19:59,968 --> 01:20:02,535
Cut, cut.
1297
01:20:02,568 --> 01:20:04,202
Who the hell are these guys?
1298
01:20:04,235 --> 01:20:06,135
Who cares?
At least it's in color.
1299
01:20:06,167 --> 01:20:08,569
- Rhubarb.
- Hmm?
1300
01:20:08,601 --> 01:20:09,769
Rhubarb! Rhubarb!
1301
01:20:10,702 --> 01:20:13,070
- Oh, no.
- Oh, shit!
1302
01:20:14,801 --> 01:20:17,268
Motherfucker.
1303
01:20:17,302 --> 01:20:20,636
Duke, we gotta get out of here. We gotta
go. We gotta go. We gotta get out of here.
1304
01:20:20,669 --> 01:20:23,102
Get the car. Get the car.
Get the car.
1305
01:20:26,936 --> 01:20:28,837
Hurry up!
1306
01:20:38,902 --> 01:20:43,902
Butterscotch, no!
Come back. Come back.
1307
01:22:20,001 --> 01:22:24,236
Sorry, Mr. Montana,
but I'm gonna have to kill you.
1308
01:22:24,269 --> 01:22:27,002
- Kill me?
- Under different circumstances,
1309
01:22:27,034 --> 01:22:29,201
I might be telling you
how much I appreciated your work
1310
01:22:29,234 --> 01:22:31,869
in Silver Spurs
or Save Three for Papa.
1311
01:22:31,902 --> 01:22:33,135
You liked that fucking movie?
1312
01:22:33,167 --> 01:22:34,669
Oh, yeah. A lot.
1313
01:22:34,701 --> 01:22:39,702
But, well,
I... I got to kill you.
1314
01:22:46,234 --> 01:22:49,636
Reggie, Reggie, don't do something
you're gonna regret, please.
1315
01:22:49,668 --> 01:22:51,635
- Don't do it.
- "Reggie"? Do you know these guys?
1316
01:22:51,669 --> 01:22:54,535
I'm not gonna regret
any part of this.
1317
01:22:54,569 --> 01:22:58,236
Matter of fact, I think
I'll kill you first, Max.
1318
01:23:02,002 --> 01:23:04,636
Great job, Duke. Now what?
1319
01:23:04,668 --> 01:23:07,470
Now what? How about telling me
what the hell is going on here?
1320
01:23:38,235 --> 01:23:40,503
Whoa, whoa.
1321
01:24:14,802 --> 01:24:16,169
Duke.
1322
01:24:25,835 --> 01:24:29,168
Oh, my fucking shit.
1323
01:24:30,901 --> 01:24:33,735
Yes. Yes. Yes.
1324
01:24:36,701 --> 01:24:39,536
Maxy, goddamn.
I think you did it, partner.
1325
01:24:39,568 --> 01:24:42,034
- That's our movie?
- Yeah. That's it.
1326
01:24:42,068 --> 01:24:44,669
I would say this is
some of your best work, Max,
1327
01:24:44,701 --> 01:24:47,268
but that wouldn't be saying a whole
lot, would it?
1328
01:24:47,301 --> 01:24:50,569
But let me be the first one
to say it to you. Oscar.
1329
01:24:51,403 --> 01:24:54,536
Huh? Huh? How much more
you got to shoot?
1330
01:24:54,569 --> 01:24:55,835
- One day.
- One day?
1331
01:24:55,867 --> 01:24:58,034
I'll see you in LA. Yeah?
1332
01:24:58,067 --> 01:25:01,236
Uh, Mr. Mon... Duke?
1333
01:25:01,268 --> 01:25:03,934
Duke? Thank you.
1334
01:25:03,967 --> 01:25:06,236
- Mm-hmm.
- Okay.
1335
01:25:06,268 --> 01:25:08,502
Put them guns away.
We're not killing anybody.
1336
01:25:08,535 --> 01:25:11,569
Can I at least throw a bullet
at the motherfucker?
1337
01:25:11,602 --> 01:25:14,269
Like I said, would you mind
telling me what's going on here?
1338
01:25:14,301 --> 01:25:19,068
Well, Duke, I... I... I just,
I don't want you to be upset
1339
01:25:19,102 --> 01:25:21,236
with what I'm gonna tell you.
1340
01:25:21,269 --> 01:25:26,569
Oh, heck, Mr. Barber,
you can tell me anything. We're friends.
1341
01:25:30,601 --> 01:25:32,568
Duke, Duke, you can't.
1342
01:25:32,602 --> 01:25:34,669
Why the hell not?
You were trying to.
1343
01:25:34,701 --> 01:25:37,702
- What the hell are you doing?
- Max is sorry he was trying to kill you, Duke.
1344
01:25:37,736 --> 01:25:40,034
- Ah, shit.
- Which Walter inspired me to do.
1345
01:25:40,068 --> 01:25:43,503
- No, I did not.
- Oh, yes, you did. Oh, yes, you did.
1346
01:25:43,535 --> 01:25:45,968
I did not. The point is,
Duke, we all want you alive.
1347
01:25:46,001 --> 01:25:49,502
- Of course, I want him alive.
- Ah, damn it. This is not about me living or dying.
1348
01:25:49,536 --> 01:25:51,268
- It's not?
- No.
1349
01:25:51,302 --> 01:25:54,136
Duke, you're not making any sense.
1350
01:25:55,602 --> 01:26:00,702
I have been trying
to destroy myself
1351
01:26:00,736 --> 01:26:05,469
because I broke her heart,
the love of my life.
1352
01:26:06,301 --> 01:26:07,868
I can't let her go.
1353
01:26:07,902 --> 01:26:09,068
Who, Duke?
1354
01:26:09,102 --> 01:26:10,536
Bessie.
1355
01:26:12,568 --> 01:26:14,034
Bess Jones.
1356
01:26:14,067 --> 01:26:18,703
When I was in New Orleans,
I wound up in a black club.
1357
01:26:18,736 --> 01:26:22,002
Blues, they had
Willie Proudfoot playing.
1358
01:26:22,035 --> 01:26:27,802
She looked at me with those
big beautiful eyes and she sang.
1359
01:26:31,235 --> 01:26:36,602
And I knew right then and there,
she was the one for me and me for her.
1360
01:26:36,636 --> 01:26:40,068
I was about to sign a million-dollar
contract and the studio boss says,
1361
01:26:40,102 --> 01:26:42,835
"Duke, you got to
make up your mind.
1362
01:26:42,867 --> 01:26:44,801
Are you gonna be
a rich Western movie star
1363
01:26:44,834 --> 01:26:50,801
or do you wanna run off
with your black girlfriend?"
1364
01:26:50,834 --> 01:26:52,536
So you chose stardom?
1365
01:26:52,568 --> 01:26:54,868
Who the goddamn hell is
telling this fucking story?
1366
01:26:54,901 --> 01:26:57,568
A happy, well-adjusted man
with his soul mate at his side
1367
01:26:57,602 --> 01:27:03,936
or an angry, broke-down,
emptied-out, uh, suicidal drunk?
1368
01:27:05,902 --> 01:27:08,702
Why don't you guys get out of
here so that I can kill myself?
1369
01:27:08,734 --> 01:27:12,134
- No. No. No, no, no. Duke.
- Duke. Duke!
1370
01:27:12,168 --> 01:27:15,202
Duke!
1371
01:27:15,234 --> 01:27:17,935
Now you listen to me,
you son of a bitch!
1372
01:27:17,967 --> 01:27:19,934
I'm sick and tired of this shit.
1373
01:27:19,968 --> 01:27:22,735
I don't give a shit about you,
or your sad story,
1374
01:27:22,768 --> 01:27:25,935
or your fucking colored Louisiana
blues-singing girlfriend.
1375
01:27:25,967 --> 01:27:28,802
I have bled through my ass
for this fucking moment,
1376
01:27:28,835 --> 01:27:31,069
and I am one scene away
from my fucking Oscar.
1377
01:27:31,101 --> 01:27:34,801
You're gonna stop with the booze, stop
with the gun, and stop with the bullshit!
1378
01:27:34,834 --> 01:27:36,568
You're gonna get
a good night's sleep.
1379
01:27:36,601 --> 01:27:38,503
You're gonna have wonderful,
beautiful dreams
1380
01:27:38,535 --> 01:27:41,901
of prairies and mountain streams
with deer and antelope playing.
1381
01:27:41,934 --> 01:27:44,535
And in the morning,
you're gonna wake up refreshed,
1382
01:27:44,569 --> 01:27:45,902
drink a pot of fucking coffee,
1383
01:27:45,934 --> 01:27:47,235
you're gonna do
the goddamn scene,
1384
01:27:47,268 --> 01:27:49,701
and you're gonna
do it brilliantly.
1385
01:27:49,734 --> 01:27:52,235
And after that,
when our director yells "cut,"
1386
01:27:52,268 --> 01:27:56,035
you can stick a bazooka up your ass and
pull the fucking trigger for all I care.
1387
01:27:56,067 --> 01:28:01,734
But you will be on that set
tomorrow morning at 7:00 a.m.
1388
01:28:01,767 --> 01:28:04,869
and you will finish this movie!
1389
01:28:11,701 --> 01:28:14,035
That's the most honest thing
anybody has said
1390
01:28:14,067 --> 01:28:15,836
this entire shoot.
1391
01:28:27,201 --> 01:28:30,101
Life is really just
one big mistake, isn't it?
1392
01:28:32,268 --> 01:28:34,935
I mean, it's so precious.
1393
01:28:36,668 --> 01:28:39,603
And we treat it like
it was meaningless.
1394
01:28:41,268 --> 01:28:46,935
I was playing poker one time with this
old Chinese feller named Chen Liu.
1395
01:28:48,135 --> 01:28:53,834
Long, white, flowing hair,
boniest of hands, far too many teeth.
1396
01:28:53,867 --> 01:28:58,503
And he was laughing and drinking
and having a good old time.
1397
01:28:58,536 --> 01:29:04,002
And I swear, he had the biggest pile of
poker chips in front him I had ever seen.
1398
01:29:04,034 --> 01:29:07,168
Thousands of dollars.
Thousands upon thousands.
1399
01:29:07,201 --> 01:29:11,535
Hell, he had so many poker
chips, he was giving them away.
1400
01:29:15,301 --> 01:29:17,801
And then his pile
of poker chips dwindled.
1401
01:29:19,701 --> 01:29:21,602
And it dwindled
some more.
1402
01:29:23,768 --> 01:29:27,035
And as the evening went on,
old Chen sobered up...
1403
01:29:28,202 --> 01:29:31,102
and realized
what he had done.
1404
01:29:34,700 --> 01:29:38,567
I wish I had been a little bit more
respectful of the pile of poker chips
1405
01:29:38,601 --> 01:29:41,235
that God put in front of me
to get started on.
1406
01:29:44,235 --> 01:29:47,069
But you know, that's life.
1407
01:29:49,600 --> 01:29:52,068
Mistakes
and lost poker chips.
1408
01:29:54,167 --> 01:29:59,035
One great, big, beautiful...
1409
01:30:01,001 --> 01:30:02,601
mistake.
1410
01:30:12,968 --> 01:30:15,203
And cut.
1411
01:30:20,002 --> 01:30:21,034
That's a wrap.
1412
01:30:26,600 --> 01:30:27,869
We did it.
1413
01:30:49,567 --> 01:30:53,534
This is Sophie Renee. It's a beautiful
summer evening in Los Angeles,
1414
01:30:53,567 --> 01:30:57,201
and we're all here for the world
premiere of The Oldest Gun in the West.
1415
01:30:57,234 --> 01:30:59,567
We're waiting
for the stars to arrive.
1416
01:30:59,601 --> 01:31:02,568
We have some producers,
we have some of the actors,
1417
01:31:02,601 --> 01:31:05,667
and this is the big return
of Duke Montana,
1418
01:31:05,701 --> 01:31:09,767
one of the greatest Hollywood icons
ever to grace the silver screen.
1419
01:31:09,801 --> 01:31:12,102
Excuse me, gentlemen.
Hello.
1420
01:31:12,134 --> 01:31:16,534
Max Barber, Walter Creason, you two are the
producers of The Oldest Gun in the West,
1421
01:31:16,567 --> 01:31:18,902
which many are saying is going to
be the one to beat on Oscar night.
1422
01:31:18,935 --> 01:31:22,535
- How are you feeling?
- Well, we're very honored and humbled to be here,
1423
01:31:22,568 --> 01:31:24,969
and this is what happens when
a lot of talented individuals
1424
01:31:25,001 --> 01:31:27,768
all come together with
a singular vision and purpose.
1425
01:31:27,801 --> 01:31:29,535
It's quite special.
1426
01:31:29,567 --> 01:31:31,834
Let's just say that my uncle
and I believe in miracles.
1427
01:31:31,868 --> 01:31:33,868
- Yeah, that's for sure.
- Oh. That's lovely.
1428
01:31:33,902 --> 01:31:35,735
Oh, excuse me. Megan Albert.
1429
01:31:35,767 --> 01:31:37,969
I heard your work
is amazing in the picture.
1430
01:31:38,001 --> 01:31:41,868
You're one of the very few female
directors in Hollywood. How does that feel?
1431
01:31:41,902 --> 01:31:46,002
Well, I really hope that I can inspire
more women to become directors.
1432
01:31:46,034 --> 01:31:48,567
I really have Max Barber,
Walter Creason
1433
01:31:48,601 --> 01:31:51,236
and, most of all, Duke Montana
to thank for believing in me.
1434
01:31:51,269 --> 01:31:53,869
- Aw.
- She's cool, huh? We met at work together.
1435
01:31:53,901 --> 01:31:55,934
Oh. Uh, what's next
for you all?
1436
01:31:55,968 --> 01:31:59,069
Well, actually, uh, now that
I'm the president of the studio,
1437
01:31:59,101 --> 01:32:02,767
I've signed Max,
Walter and Megan to a multi-picture deal.
1438
01:32:02,801 --> 01:32:07,502
In fact, my first project out of the
gate is gonna be the epic Paradise.
1439
01:32:07,534 --> 01:32:10,601
And I will be
co-financing
1440
01:32:10,634 --> 01:32:13,902
all future Miracle
Motion Picture pictures.
1441
01:32:13,934 --> 01:32:16,069
Right, you heard me.
1442
01:32:16,101 --> 01:32:19,634
Just like Humphrey Bogart muscled out
Jimmy Cagney in The Roaring Twenties.
1443
01:32:19,668 --> 01:32:20,901
Do you remember that, huh?
1444
01:32:20,935 --> 01:32:22,902
- That's right. Yeah.
- Huh? Remember?
1445
01:32:24,001 --> 01:32:26,868
Like the brother just said, we in the "bidness"!
1446
01:32:26,902 --> 01:32:31,734
You dig? We're gonna be doing Black
movies too with Black actors. Right on.
1447
01:32:33,601 --> 01:32:37,236
Okay. So, Max and James,
rumor has it that over the years,
1448
01:32:37,268 --> 01:32:39,701
you two have had a very
contentious relationship.
1449
01:32:39,734 --> 01:32:40,968
You care to comment?
1450
01:32:41,001 --> 01:32:42,801
Well, Jimmy and I
have talked this over
1451
01:32:42,834 --> 01:32:44,835
and we both agree that
there's nothing as tenuous
1452
01:32:44,867 --> 01:32:46,601
as enemies in show business.
1453
01:32:46,634 --> 01:32:48,702
Yeah. I mean, you can't
believe everything you hear.
1454
01:32:48,734 --> 01:32:51,667
Max Barber
is a great, great
1455
01:32:51,700 --> 01:32:53,701
grandfather figure for me,
always has been.
1456
01:32:53,734 --> 01:32:55,968
Okay, gentlemen.
1457
01:32:56,002 --> 01:32:58,768
Well, thank you for stopping and
I wish you all the best tonight.
1458
01:32:58,800 --> 01:33:00,935
- Thank you. Okay.
- Thank you.
1459
01:33:00,967 --> 01:33:04,101
- What the fuck was the "grandfather" thing?
- I told you not to call me Jimmy.
1460
01:33:04,134 --> 01:33:06,501
Well, don't call Paradise
your movie, 'cause it's not.
1461
01:33:06,535 --> 01:33:08,201
Can we at least agree
that it is ours?
1462
01:33:08,235 --> 01:33:10,034
No, it's not ours.
I had to sign the...
1463
01:33:10,068 --> 01:33:12,535
- Max, come on. Max.
- Look who we have now.
1464
01:33:12,567 --> 01:33:14,801
Hey, come on.
It's our movie.
1465
01:33:14,835 --> 01:33:16,501
Yeah.
Yeah. Good enough.
1466
01:33:26,035 --> 01:33:29,602
Duke Montana.
How does it feel to be back on top?
1467
01:33:29,634 --> 01:33:31,734
Oh, I don't know.
1468
01:33:31,767 --> 01:33:35,235
I guess it's very nice if you all
came out to see an old cowboy.
1469
01:33:35,268 --> 01:33:38,901
Aw, well, congratulations.
We wish you the best of luck tonight.
1470
01:33:38,934 --> 01:33:41,801
- Duke? Come on, you're gonna miss your big comeback.
- Come on.
1471
01:33:41,835 --> 01:33:44,669
- I'll be right with you, partner.
- Hey, Duke.
1472
01:33:46,068 --> 01:33:48,802
Come on, Duke.
This is more your night than anybody's.
1473
01:33:50,269 --> 01:33:53,502
I don't do very well
in crowds, Mr. Barber. I...
1474
01:33:54,801 --> 01:33:57,568
I think I do better
in, uh, wide-open spaces.
1475
01:33:57,601 --> 01:33:59,702
But we need you.
Come on, come on, come on.
1476
01:33:59,734 --> 01:34:03,568
Mr. Barber, I can't do it.
1477
01:34:11,935 --> 01:34:15,869
Hey. Thank you
for trying to kill me.
1478
01:34:16,767 --> 01:34:18,101
Thanks for not dying.
1479
01:34:19,767 --> 01:34:20,901
Okay.
1480
01:34:26,667 --> 01:34:27,801
Duke!
1481
01:34:29,767 --> 01:34:32,201
- We love you!
- We love you, Duke.
1482
01:34:32,234 --> 01:34:34,468
You're the best, Duke.
1483
01:34:41,634 --> 01:34:43,702
I hope you find
what you're looking for.
1484
01:35:22,535 --> 01:35:23,735
Bess home?
1485
01:38:48,625 --> 01:38:50,959
From Miracle Motion Pictures,
1486
01:38:50,993 --> 01:38:54,326
the studio that brought you Cows From Beyond...
1487
01:38:54,359 --> 01:38:56,593
...Bigfoot Was My Lover,
1488
01:38:56,626 --> 01:38:59,393
The Hackensack
Blowtorch Atrocities
1489
01:38:59,426 --> 01:39:02,459
and the time-honored classic, Mantula...
1490
01:39:02,491 --> 01:39:05,027
...comes a new movie
1491
01:39:05,060 --> 01:39:08,227
that literally tests
the boundaries of cinema.
1492
01:39:11,192 --> 01:39:14,259
The Sisters of Eternal Sorrows
take their vows
1493
01:39:14,291 --> 01:39:17,226
very, very seriously.
1494
01:39:18,960 --> 01:39:20,193
Fuck.
1495
01:39:22,893 --> 01:39:26,127
Madone. These are
some hot nuns.
1496
01:39:26,159 --> 01:39:27,425
Say your prayers.
1497
01:39:31,859 --> 01:39:34,259
Killer Nuns.
1498
01:39:34,292 --> 01:39:38,027
They're cleaning up the streets
in their own special way.
1499
01:39:38,059 --> 01:39:39,093
Ah, jeez.
1500
01:39:40,592 --> 01:39:43,227
This is a big score
for the orphanage.
1501
01:39:43,259 --> 01:39:44,993
The kids
are gonna love this.
1502
01:39:46,193 --> 01:39:48,359
Killer Nuns.
1503
01:39:48,391 --> 01:39:53,159
They're nuns with a bad habit.
1504
01:39:55,392 --> 01:39:57,560
Get these freaking cops
off of me.
1505
01:39:57,592 --> 01:39:59,292
Okay. Gun it.
1506
01:40:07,025 --> 01:40:09,959
They're sisters on a mission.
1507
01:40:09,993 --> 01:40:12,492
That's the good shit,
kid. Enjoy it.
1508
01:40:15,125 --> 01:40:17,393
Selling drugs to babies?
1509
01:40:17,425 --> 01:40:19,225
Hey, I'm...
I'm a Catholic.
1510
01:40:19,258 --> 01:40:20,592
So are we.
1511
01:40:20,626 --> 01:40:23,193
They're tough. They're mean.
1512
01:40:23,226 --> 01:40:25,960
Killer Nuns.
1513
01:40:26,064 --> 01:40:31,064
Provided by explosiveskull
https://twitter.com/kaboomskull