1 00:01:45,872 --> 00:01:49,968 'Hi, this is Kat. Leave a message and I'll call you back. ' 2 00:01:50,009 --> 00:01:53,240 'Hi, Kat. This is Nick Mercer. 3 00:01:53,680 --> 00:01:57,776 'Sorry I didn't get back to you last night but I got your messages. 4 00:01:57,817 --> 00:01:59,250 'All seven of them. 5 00:02:00,286 --> 00:02:04,450 'I know you're nervous, Kat, but this is what I get paid for. 6 00:02:05,825 --> 00:02:09,693 'I'm running late so I sent a messenger to pick up my ticket. 7 00:02:09,729 --> 00:02:12,254 'Kat, stop worrying. 8 00:02:12,298 --> 00:02:14,789 'Your ex-fianc� will wish he never left you 9 00:02:14,834 --> 00:02:17,530 'and your family will think we're in love. 10 00:02:17,570 --> 00:02:21,506 'Trust me. I'll see you at the airport. Can't wait to meet you. ' 11 00:02:30,850 --> 00:02:33,717 So sorry. I wasn't quite ready. 12 00:02:47,867 --> 00:02:49,835 It's a plane ticket. 13 00:02:49,869 --> 00:02:52,167 For a date. My date. 14 00:02:53,873 --> 00:02:56,467 For my sister's wedding, in London. 15 00:02:56,509 --> 00:02:58,136 You need to let go. 16 00:02:59,179 --> 00:03:01,170 You're gonna have to help me. 17 00:05:31,431 --> 00:05:33,262 '... 356 to London Heathrow, 18 00:05:33,299 --> 00:05:36,268 'all remaining passengers please make your way... ' 19 00:05:36,302 --> 00:05:39,328 Harry, I'm not working, I'm going to my sister's wedding. 20 00:05:39,372 --> 00:05:42,136 Customer service will have to survive without me. 21 00:05:42,175 --> 00:05:45,633 But Kat, we've had three delays and two reps call in sick. 22 00:05:45,678 --> 00:05:49,375 And a 2505 on the 8:20 CPT to LGW. 23 00:05:49,415 --> 00:05:51,349 And there's this guy on line two 24 00:05:51,384 --> 00:05:55,821 who gut stuck with in-laws because we couldn't get him out of Heathrow. 25 00:05:55,855 --> 00:05:59,814 I'd love to help you, sincerely, but I haven't seen my family in two years 26 00:05:59,859 --> 00:06:02,225 and my flight leaves in 15 minutes. 27 00:06:02,729 --> 00:06:06,790 Come on, Kat. Please, I'm begging you. 28 00:06:10,136 --> 00:06:13,572 Bump the 14:14 to the upper on 16:10. 29 00:06:13,606 --> 00:06:15,665 What about line two? 30 00:06:17,009 --> 00:06:19,068 Check my bags. 31 00:06:19,112 --> 00:06:23,173 I understand, you want your family to see you the way you see yourself, 32 00:06:23,216 --> 00:06:25,810 or would, if you didn't feel so victimized by them. 33 00:06:26,018 --> 00:06:28,509 Hello! 34 00:06:28,554 --> 00:06:33,548 We regret that you were inconvenienced. Unfortunately, we are not liable. 35 00:06:35,328 --> 00:06:39,765 But just this once I'll refund your ticket and credit you 10,000 frequent flyer miles. 36 00:06:39,799 --> 00:06:42,290 Thank you for calling Virgin Atlantic. 37 00:06:52,545 --> 00:06:54,775 Your first trip? 38 00:06:58,117 --> 00:07:01,382 My sister's getting married and the best man is my ex. 39 00:07:01,421 --> 00:07:04,686 If I chicken out, I wanna know where the exits are. 40 00:07:12,198 --> 00:07:14,496 I'm not a knuckler, I fly all the time. 41 00:07:14,534 --> 00:07:16,764 The reason I can't feel my legs 42 00:07:16,803 --> 00:07:19,966 is that any second my date is gonna sit down in 3B 43 00:07:20,006 --> 00:07:22,338 and I need him to look really good today. 44 00:07:23,543 --> 00:07:25,511 Hello, 3B. 45 00:07:35,822 --> 00:07:37,483 Thank you. 46 00:07:41,060 --> 00:07:42,652 Hey. 47 00:07:42,695 --> 00:07:44,492 Kat. 48 00:07:49,135 --> 00:07:50,693 Let's sit. 49 00:08:01,247 --> 00:08:03,238 I'm glad you found it OK. 50 00:08:04,016 --> 00:08:06,211 The airport... The plane, I mean. 51 00:08:07,019 --> 00:08:12,082 I'm sorry we couldn't leave sooner. I know you wanted to get settled before the party. 52 00:08:12,124 --> 00:08:14,115 Work must be crazy. 53 00:08:25,171 --> 00:08:27,366 Oh, I should warn you. 54 00:08:27,406 --> 00:08:30,773 You know those families where everyone's out of their mind 55 00:08:30,810 --> 00:08:33,176 but they're your family so you love them? 56 00:08:33,212 --> 00:08:34,839 Mine's not like that. 57 00:08:48,027 --> 00:08:50,495 I love my dad. 58 00:08:50,530 --> 00:08:54,364 But since he's my stepdad, he's technically not family. 59 00:08:54,400 --> 00:08:56,027 He's more like a hostage. 60 00:09:09,315 --> 00:09:10,942 'Ladies and gentlemen, 61 00:09:10,983 --> 00:09:14,612 'we will shortly be arriving at London Heathrow. 62 00:09:14,654 --> 00:09:16,986 'On arrival, please remain seated 63 00:09:17,023 --> 00:09:20,550 'until the seat belt sign has been switched off. 64 00:09:20,593 --> 00:09:23,391 'Local time is 4:22pm 65 00:09:23,429 --> 00:09:25,420 'and the temperature is a warm 21... ' 66 00:09:25,464 --> 00:09:27,091 Good morning. 67 00:09:27,133 --> 00:09:30,296 'That's 72 degrees Fahrenheit. 68 00:09:30,336 --> 00:09:33,032 'We would like to thank you for flying with us today 69 00:09:33,072 --> 00:09:35,802 'and look forward to seeing you again soon. ' 70 00:09:40,046 --> 00:09:41,138 Oh. 71 00:09:43,816 --> 00:09:47,377 Nick, please tell me you're not wearing that tonight. 72 00:09:47,420 --> 00:09:49,786 I am. 73 00:09:49,822 --> 00:09:55,351 It's no big deal really, it just looks like a tailor made your tie out of my dress. 74 00:09:55,394 --> 00:10:01,333 Don't get me wrong - matching's fine. It's matchy-matchy you wanna look out for. 75 00:10:02,368 --> 00:10:05,394 - We look like we're trying too hard. - Exactly. 76 00:10:05,438 --> 00:10:09,169 I want us to look like we fit but not like we're trying to look like we fit. 77 00:10:09,208 --> 00:10:11,199 Let me teach you a trick. 78 00:10:11,243 --> 00:10:15,407 If you look people in the eye, they'll never notice what you're wearing. 79 00:10:15,448 --> 00:10:18,576 There's no way I'm showing up in his and her outfits 80 00:10:18,618 --> 00:10:21,815 so if you're gonna wear that tie, I have to change my dress. 81 00:10:21,854 --> 00:10:24,789 Driver, will you please pull over somewhere? 82 00:10:31,364 --> 00:10:34,663 I'm sorry. I promise this is the last one. 83 00:10:34,700 --> 00:10:37,362 You must think... Who knows what you think? 84 00:10:37,403 --> 00:10:39,871 I know how important this is for you. 85 00:10:39,905 --> 00:10:44,035 But remember, you're a beautiful woman and you've got everything going for you. 86 00:10:44,076 --> 00:10:45,771 Don't patronize me. 87 00:10:46,579 --> 00:10:49,571 I feel like crap but I wanna look hot doing it. 88 00:10:52,818 --> 00:10:55,218 Mission accomplished. 89 00:10:55,254 --> 00:10:56,721 Really? 90 00:10:57,590 --> 00:10:59,956 Don't get too attached. 91 00:11:07,533 --> 00:11:09,524 I prefer the red one. 92 00:11:10,736 --> 00:11:12,897 I'll let her know. 93 00:11:16,742 --> 00:11:18,209 Hmm... 94 00:11:18,244 --> 00:11:21,179 "Hmm, nice dress," or "Hmm... 95 00:11:21,213 --> 00:11:23,807 "Gorgeous. I was insane to let you go"? 96 00:11:25,184 --> 00:11:27,584 Well, I'd shag you. 97 00:11:27,620 --> 00:11:29,520 If that's all right with you? 98 00:11:40,299 --> 00:11:42,164 I don't know if I can do this. 99 00:11:42,201 --> 00:11:46,331 Well, you can never be sure of anything but we still have to go inside. 100 00:11:56,315 --> 00:11:59,341 - Aunt Bea! - Dear girl. 101 00:11:59,385 --> 00:12:02,320 This should have been you getting married. 102 00:12:02,354 --> 00:12:05,551 You know, you didn't have to return the gravy boat. 103 00:12:05,591 --> 00:12:08,788 And to think Jeffrey is the best man. 104 00:12:08,828 --> 00:12:10,728 Have you met Nick? 105 00:12:10,763 --> 00:12:12,754 - How do you do? - Oh. 106 00:12:13,799 --> 00:12:15,790 Charming. 107 00:12:15,835 --> 00:12:17,462 And what do you do? 108 00:12:18,838 --> 00:12:20,100 Excuse us. 109 00:12:25,644 --> 00:12:27,805 What a nightmare. 110 00:12:31,650 --> 00:12:33,277 OK, we need a story. 111 00:12:33,319 --> 00:12:37,779 You're a therapist, we just started dating and you're crazy about me. 112 00:12:40,159 --> 00:12:42,457 Count it. 6,000 even. 113 00:12:42,495 --> 00:12:46,192 - Oh, I trust you. - No. Count it. 114 00:12:50,102 --> 00:12:51,763 All right. 115 00:12:59,445 --> 00:13:03,779 I'll cover expenses but if you want to be intimate, we talk money first. 116 00:13:03,816 --> 00:13:07,775 That won't be an issue. I find the idea of sex for money morally repugnant. 117 00:13:08,821 --> 00:13:11,915 I'm sorry. No offense. 118 00:13:13,826 --> 00:13:16,021 Do me a favor, quit apologizing. 119 00:13:16,061 --> 00:13:19,155 If you look at this as a business transaction, 120 00:13:19,198 --> 00:13:21,928 maybe you won't feel compelled to keep saying sorry. 121 00:13:21,967 --> 00:13:23,457 I'm sorry. 122 00:13:23,502 --> 00:13:25,197 It's also really annoying. 123 00:13:39,819 --> 00:13:41,343 Sorry. 124 00:13:41,387 --> 00:13:44,618 - Sorry. - Pussy Kat! What happened to you? 125 00:13:44,657 --> 00:13:49,151 - Pull over for a quickie? - Mom, this is so not the time to be yourself. 126 00:13:49,862 --> 00:13:51,830 And who might this be? 127 00:13:51,864 --> 00:13:54,594 Hi. I'm the new guy. It's great to meet you. 128 00:13:54,633 --> 00:13:58,125 Lovely. This is a marathon, not a sprint. 129 00:13:58,170 --> 00:14:00,195 We've got welcome cocktails today 130 00:14:00,239 --> 00:14:03,538 then tomorrow's Young People In The Park and Stags And Hens. 131 00:14:03,576 --> 00:14:10,004 Friday's the picnic, then the rehearsal dinner and since you have left no margin for jetlag, 132 00:14:10,049 --> 00:14:12,142 I need you to hydrate. 133 00:14:17,356 --> 00:14:20,052 - Dad. - My darling. 134 00:14:21,827 --> 00:14:24,318 - Meet Nick. - Professor Ellis. 135 00:14:24,363 --> 00:14:26,695 - How do you do? - Kat? 136 00:14:27,633 --> 00:14:30,602 - Kat! Oooh! I'm getting married! Oh, Kitty! - Hey! 137 00:14:30,636 --> 00:14:32,160 Oh, I missed you so much. 138 00:14:32,204 --> 00:14:35,139 Gosh, who's the hunky, huh? Nice. 139 00:14:35,174 --> 00:14:37,734 There you are! Get over here! 140 00:14:39,345 --> 00:14:42,803 At times like these, I find a good, stiff drink helps. 141 00:14:42,848 --> 00:14:45,840 - Can I get you a refill, sir? - Very kind of you. 142 00:14:46,852 --> 00:14:48,786 Where did you find him? 143 00:14:48,821 --> 00:14:50,550 Thank you. 144 00:14:51,857 --> 00:14:53,518 Yellow Pages. 145 00:14:55,361 --> 00:14:57,420 Hello! 146 00:15:00,266 --> 00:15:03,030 Sweet Jesus. Who gave that woman an amp? 147 00:15:03,068 --> 00:15:05,298 Hello. Hello? 148 00:15:05,337 --> 00:15:08,500 Oh. Wonderful. It's finally working. 149 00:15:08,540 --> 00:15:12,943 Does everybody have a drink? Because I am going to say a few words. 150 00:15:12,978 --> 00:15:15,708 Welcome, friends and family... 151 00:15:15,748 --> 00:15:18,216 I'm... 152 00:15:18,784 --> 00:15:21,252 Victor and I are so happy 153 00:15:21,287 --> 00:15:24,222 that you're here to celebrate with us 154 00:15:24,256 --> 00:15:28,659 as we welcome Edward and the Fletcher-Wootens into our family. 155 00:15:28,694 --> 00:15:33,290 We always thought that we would marry off Kat first. 156 00:15:33,332 --> 00:15:38,133 We had good reason to hope because she was so popular with the boys at school 157 00:15:38,170 --> 00:15:40,138 and we came pretty close once, 158 00:15:40,172 --> 00:15:43,630 but, as you all know, that crashed and burned. 159 00:15:44,376 --> 00:15:47,812 Luckily, we were able to get the deposit back, 160 00:15:47,846 --> 00:15:51,407 so here we are again... 161 00:15:55,087 --> 00:15:57,078 To the bride and groom. 162 00:15:57,990 --> 00:16:03,053 Oh. Yes. Yes. Well, back to the bride and groom to be. 163 00:16:04,196 --> 00:16:06,494 Um... 164 00:16:06,532 --> 00:16:12,767 Edward, we are so glad that you fell in love with the girl next door. 165 00:16:12,805 --> 00:16:15,638 Our Amy. Congratulations, babies. 166 00:16:15,674 --> 00:16:18,336 Congratulations. 167 00:16:31,523 --> 00:16:32,615 Jeffrey. 168 00:16:33,292 --> 00:16:36,193 Hello. Kat-mandu. 169 00:16:49,508 --> 00:16:51,669 Wow, you look gorgeous. 170 00:16:53,178 --> 00:16:54,805 Gorgeous. 171 00:16:54,847 --> 00:16:57,179 Oh, my God! Oh, my God! 172 00:16:57,216 --> 00:17:01,084 Oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God! Top Kat! Ooooh! 173 00:17:01,120 --> 00:17:05,557 Where the bloody hell have you been? I have gynecologists that call more often. 174 00:17:05,591 --> 00:17:10,221 - You have more than one? - I play them off against each other. 175 00:17:10,262 --> 00:17:14,426 Hello, arsehole. Since you dumped my cousin brutally, 176 00:17:14,466 --> 00:17:16,832 you won't mind if I steal her away, will you? 177 00:17:16,869 --> 00:17:18,928 Thanks. 178 00:17:24,610 --> 00:17:28,011 - You didn't have to do that. - I wasn't saving you from him, 179 00:17:28,047 --> 00:17:30,072 I was saving you from yourself. 180 00:17:30,115 --> 00:17:33,278 You, my love, are too bloody nice. 181 00:17:34,720 --> 00:17:38,349 I've never seen so many beautiful women in one room. 182 00:17:38,390 --> 00:17:39,789 Did he bring a date? 183 00:17:39,825 --> 00:17:42,794 Darling, why waste time on that horse's arse 184 00:17:42,828 --> 00:17:46,389 when Mr. Tie Me Up, Tie Me Down is waiting for you over there? 185 00:17:46,432 --> 00:17:48,832 - What does he do? - He's a therapist. 186 00:17:49,902 --> 00:17:53,167 - The perils of paranoia. - Yes. 187 00:17:53,205 --> 00:17:55,435 Oh, God. I think I've just come. 188 00:18:03,182 --> 00:18:04,513 Thank you. 189 00:18:04,550 --> 00:18:06,541 Can I have that? 190 00:18:12,925 --> 00:18:14,586 Hm. 191 00:18:19,398 --> 00:18:21,764 Thank you. 192 00:18:21,800 --> 00:18:24,234 You know what I love about all this, Kat? 193 00:18:24,269 --> 00:18:27,136 There's finally a reason for the world to revolve around you? 194 00:18:27,172 --> 00:18:28,969 Exactly. 195 00:18:31,677 --> 00:18:34,578 - There you are. - How's the future missus? 196 00:18:34,613 --> 00:18:36,808 I'm perfect, I'm all ginny. 197 00:18:36,849 --> 00:18:39,249 Thanks, Snufflepop. 198 00:18:43,155 --> 00:18:45,589 Mmm! Mm-mm-mm! 199 00:18:46,992 --> 00:18:48,619 Wow! 200 00:18:48,660 --> 00:18:51,527 Am I not the luckiest bastard on earth? 201 00:18:51,563 --> 00:18:55,329 Aw! Well, I'll dance to that. 202 00:18:56,902 --> 00:18:58,870 - Oh! - Oh, Jesus! 203 00:19:00,839 --> 00:19:03,740 That's what he gets for not taking dance lessons 204 00:19:03,775 --> 00:19:06,266 until two days before the wedding. 205 00:19:06,311 --> 00:19:09,178 Who's ever heard of dance lessons for a wedding? 206 00:19:09,214 --> 00:19:11,648 Just about everyone. 207 00:19:11,683 --> 00:19:13,514 You are taking the piss? 208 00:19:13,552 --> 00:19:15,179 We'll go with you. 209 00:19:15,220 --> 00:19:18,189 I don't even know you, hunky dunky, and I love you already. 210 00:19:19,024 --> 00:19:23,188 Dance lessons? Hm. Right. 211 00:19:32,171 --> 00:19:35,766 - Hey. - Oh. Hello. 212 00:19:40,379 --> 00:19:43,780 Weddings are a celebration of love and commitment... 213 00:19:43,815 --> 00:19:45,476 in Utopia. 214 00:19:45,517 --> 00:19:49,578 In the real world they're an excuse to drink excessively and say things you shouldn't. 215 00:19:49,621 --> 00:19:53,785 - A philosopher, huh? - Well, shrink. 216 00:19:53,825 --> 00:19:55,986 - Crikey! - What? 217 00:19:56,028 --> 00:19:58,019 - No, nothing. - No, tell me. 218 00:19:58,830 --> 00:20:01,025 Well, you Yanks and your therapy, 219 00:20:01,066 --> 00:20:04,297 it's a load of touchy-feely mumbo jumbo. 220 00:20:05,270 --> 00:20:08,706 Spilling your guts to a total stranger, it's not natural. 221 00:20:12,177 --> 00:20:14,168 Oh, God. 222 00:20:15,681 --> 00:20:17,171 It's just... 223 00:20:17,216 --> 00:20:22,085 There's this girl that I care for... Well, I suppose you could say I love her. 224 00:20:23,422 --> 00:20:26,721 The bugger is, she's here with some other guy. 225 00:20:26,758 --> 00:20:28,419 There you are. 226 00:20:29,828 --> 00:20:32,194 Hey, Kat. Hey, Kat. 227 00:20:32,231 --> 00:20:34,859 Oh, hey, yourself. I see you met my ex. 228 00:20:38,103 --> 00:20:40,799 - I was just telling him how we met. - Mm. 229 00:20:42,874 --> 00:20:44,865 - The Knicks game. - Oh, yes. 230 00:20:44,910 --> 00:20:46,741 Yeah... Oh. 231 00:20:46,778 --> 00:20:48,370 You hate sport. 232 00:20:48,413 --> 00:20:50,881 - I hate cricket. - Right, yes. 233 00:20:52,751 --> 00:20:55,413 Well, I should go and... go. 234 00:20:58,890 --> 00:21:00,881 He looks miserable. 235 00:21:01,760 --> 00:21:05,196 - What were you talking about? - He seems a little drunk 236 00:21:05,230 --> 00:21:08,028 but I think he's still crazy about you. 237 00:21:08,066 --> 00:21:10,534 - Do I know you from somewhere? - No. 238 00:21:12,304 --> 00:21:14,295 What did he say? You don't... 239 00:21:15,674 --> 00:21:17,642 You don't think he wants me back? 240 00:21:39,431 --> 00:21:41,661 Are you OK? 241 00:21:43,802 --> 00:21:46,327 - Here we are. - Thank God! 242 00:21:46,371 --> 00:21:49,465 - Oh! - Thanks, Mom. 243 00:21:49,508 --> 00:21:52,272 - There you are, darling. - Thanks, Dad. 244 00:21:52,311 --> 00:21:54,279 God! 245 00:21:57,883 --> 00:22:02,786 - Thanks again for having me. - Don't be silly. It's wonderful to meet you. 246 00:22:02,821 --> 00:22:06,416 Although technically, I never knew you existed. 247 00:22:06,458 --> 00:22:09,791 - Come on, Bunny. - I love surprises. 248 00:22:10,462 --> 00:22:12,794 Where's Nick sleeping? 249 00:22:12,831 --> 00:22:17,427 My mother has this rule about sharing when there's no ring involved... 250 00:22:17,469 --> 00:22:19,903 - Don't be silly. - What? 251 00:22:19,938 --> 00:22:24,034 I am not as small-town as my daughter seems to think. 252 00:22:41,360 --> 00:22:43,021 Sorry about this. 253 00:22:43,061 --> 00:22:46,292 I went through a painfully earnest floral phase. 254 00:22:52,871 --> 00:22:54,862 Air Supply? 255 00:22:58,443 --> 00:23:02,402 Oh. My parents had a German exchange student a few years back. 256 00:23:03,482 --> 00:23:05,473 He must have left it here. 257 00:23:11,356 --> 00:23:13,256 Everyone knows their greatest hits. 258 00:23:13,291 --> 00:23:16,590 Some of their lesser-known ballads are surprisingly poignant. 259 00:23:29,341 --> 00:23:34,711 Is that an old habit from ballet class or from a lifetime of walking on eggshells? 260 00:23:40,685 --> 00:23:42,346 I never took ballet. 261 00:23:50,629 --> 00:23:52,256 How'd you know that was me? 262 00:23:57,469 --> 00:23:59,494 I have a friend at the magazine. 263 00:24:00,505 --> 00:24:02,632 So much for anonymity. 264 00:24:02,674 --> 00:24:05,768 Go ahead, take a look. It's part of the package. 265 00:24:11,149 --> 00:24:13,674 I'm sorry, I'm just a little nervous. 266 00:24:14,786 --> 00:24:17,619 I never thought anything like this could happen to me. 267 00:24:17,656 --> 00:24:19,647 This happened to you? 268 00:24:20,625 --> 00:24:24,721 It happened in the sense that I picked up the phone, tracked you down, 269 00:24:24,763 --> 00:24:27,755 flew you over her and gave you $6,000. 270 00:24:36,675 --> 00:24:40,372 - Will you grab my shampoo, please? - Shampoo! Got it. 271 00:25:09,474 --> 00:25:13,604 The part where you were a sexual surrogate and then started to... 272 00:25:14,746 --> 00:25:16,737 branch out, is... 273 00:25:17,716 --> 00:25:20,412 Is that really how it happened? 274 00:25:20,452 --> 00:25:24,650 The real story - my mother was a hippie, and a stripper. 275 00:25:25,724 --> 00:25:27,919 She was insanely inappropriate with me, 276 00:25:27,959 --> 00:25:31,326 she washed her lingerie in my bath water while I was still in it. 277 00:25:31,363 --> 00:25:33,024 Oh. 278 00:25:33,064 --> 00:25:37,057 So as an adult, I needed to find ways to experience intimacy and sex 279 00:25:37,102 --> 00:25:40,071 - but with rules that couldn't be violated. - Wow. 280 00:25:42,140 --> 00:25:44,301 I'm just screwing with you. 281 00:25:45,744 --> 00:25:47,837 You shit. 282 00:25:49,781 --> 00:25:51,544 OK, this part. 283 00:25:51,583 --> 00:25:54,108 You say, and I quote, 284 00:25:54,152 --> 00:25:57,280 "Every woman has the exact love life she wants. " 285 00:25:57,322 --> 00:25:59,620 That seems a broad generalization... Oh! 286 00:26:10,569 --> 00:26:12,230 Oh. 287 00:26:13,138 --> 00:26:18,007 Do you honestly believe that I want to be single and miserable? 288 00:26:18,043 --> 00:26:22,207 Do you think that I want to be hung up on some guy who led me on for years 289 00:26:22,247 --> 00:26:25,148 and out of the blue shattered my heart? 290 00:26:25,183 --> 00:26:29,244 First of all, there's no such thing as out of the blue. 291 00:26:29,287 --> 00:26:31,755 And second of all, yeah. 292 00:26:31,790 --> 00:26:34,315 - What? - When you're ready to let go, 293 00:26:34,359 --> 00:26:37,157 to be un-single and un-miserable, 294 00:26:37,195 --> 00:26:38,685 you will. 295 00:26:38,730 --> 00:26:40,391 Till then... 296 00:26:43,234 --> 00:26:46,169 So when you were talking to Jeffrey before, 297 00:26:46,204 --> 00:26:48,172 how did he sound? 298 00:26:48,206 --> 00:26:51,505 Like a harmless, self-absorbed toolbox. 299 00:26:51,543 --> 00:26:53,636 Seriously. 300 00:26:54,412 --> 00:26:56,607 He sounded tormented. 301 00:27:00,185 --> 00:27:02,176 Tormented? How? 302 00:27:02,654 --> 00:27:04,315 Like he's... 303 00:27:04,789 --> 00:27:07,656 jealous that I'm here with someone else, or like... 304 00:27:09,194 --> 00:27:12,425 he regrets throwing away our life together? 305 00:27:22,307 --> 00:27:24,298 It's just that... 306 00:27:25,143 --> 00:27:29,307 this hasn't really turned out the way that I thought it would. 307 00:27:35,820 --> 00:27:37,685 Hey, Nick. 308 00:27:40,625 --> 00:27:42,286 Oh-oh-oh! 309 00:27:53,238 --> 00:27:55,229 He seems more mature. 310 00:27:56,274 --> 00:27:58,139 Run, you fat tart! Come on. 311 00:28:06,351 --> 00:28:08,251 Come on, throw it. Throw it! 312 00:28:13,358 --> 00:28:15,519 - Well played, darling. - Ed! 313 00:28:15,560 --> 00:28:17,027 What? 314 00:28:18,296 --> 00:28:20,662 - Are you ready, TJ? - Bugger off. 315 00:28:27,305 --> 00:28:29,296 All right, batter, batter. 316 00:28:45,790 --> 00:28:47,519 - Move back. - Yeah. 317 00:28:53,698 --> 00:28:54,995 Come on, Kat. 318 00:28:59,604 --> 00:29:01,936 - You're up, Kat. - # I'll be waiting... # 319 00:29:01,973 --> 00:29:03,600 Go, Kat. 320 00:29:11,249 --> 00:29:13,240 Be nice to me, Jeffrey. 321 00:29:18,089 --> 00:29:19,954 - Out! - Yes! 322 00:29:23,795 --> 00:29:25,786 Lose the game. 323 00:29:35,774 --> 00:29:37,435 No! 324 00:29:38,443 --> 00:29:41,276 - Come on! - Edward. 325 00:29:44,082 --> 00:29:45,947 Come on! 326 00:29:45,984 --> 00:29:48,612 Come on, you sexy little monkey. Come on! 327 00:29:51,656 --> 00:29:54,853 - You're supposed to be helping. - Oh, trust me. I am. 328 00:30:23,922 --> 00:30:27,483 What's with the socks? It's a golf-themed bachelorette. 329 00:30:27,525 --> 00:30:29,720 Have you ever done a wedding before? 330 00:30:29,761 --> 00:30:31,695 No, but I have done funerals. 331 00:30:31,729 --> 00:30:34,323 An escort at a funeral? Someone's dead. 332 00:30:34,365 --> 00:30:36,663 Yeah, imagine facing that alone. 333 00:30:36,701 --> 00:30:39,033 Ah. Catch. 334 00:30:40,438 --> 00:30:43,236 Make sure he stays on the right side of the road. 335 00:30:43,274 --> 00:30:45,742 - Which is, of course, the left. - That's right. 336 00:30:47,512 --> 00:30:51,039 So, are you ever attracted to your clients? 337 00:30:51,649 --> 00:30:56,848 I know you're curious about my business but I really can't discuss other clients. 338 00:30:56,888 --> 00:31:00,324 Come on! How many of them want to sleep with you? 339 00:31:01,192 --> 00:31:05,390 You know, I swear it's not about the sex. 340 00:31:05,430 --> 00:31:08,297 It's about understanding what people need. 341 00:31:08,333 --> 00:31:11,564 Please! You're like the Yoda of escorts. 342 00:31:12,270 --> 00:31:15,933 Getting you on the phone was harder than getting into college. 343 00:31:15,974 --> 00:31:19,137 - No, I don't play games. No gimmicks. - Mm-hm. 344 00:31:19,177 --> 00:31:21,168 It's much more... 345 00:31:22,580 --> 00:31:24,241 Subtle? 346 00:31:26,985 --> 00:31:29,545 It's not about me. 347 00:31:29,587 --> 00:31:31,578 It's about you. 348 00:31:32,624 --> 00:31:34,285 Show me. 349 00:31:38,596 --> 00:31:40,257 Come on. 350 00:31:42,000 --> 00:31:44,992 Hmm... What's holding me back? 351 00:31:45,036 --> 00:31:48,301 I think it's the words "morally repugnant". 352 00:31:48,940 --> 00:31:50,601 Show me. 353 00:31:57,348 --> 00:31:59,043 Close your eyes. 354 00:32:00,418 --> 00:32:02,045 Close your eyes. 355 00:32:05,823 --> 00:32:09,088 Close your eyes. 356 00:32:15,833 --> 00:32:18,393 You're safe, you can relax. 357 00:32:21,873 --> 00:32:23,864 I'm not gonna kiss you. 358 00:32:27,111 --> 00:32:29,602 He's gonna be so sorry he lost you. 359 00:32:31,582 --> 00:32:34,574 So, stop worrying. 360 00:32:36,254 --> 00:32:38,245 Forget the past. 361 00:32:39,090 --> 00:32:40,853 Forget the pain. 362 00:32:41,759 --> 00:32:43,750 And remember... 363 00:32:46,097 --> 00:32:48,725 what an incredible woman you are. 364 00:32:53,071 --> 00:32:55,232 If you do that, 365 00:32:55,273 --> 00:32:57,207 he'll realize what he lost. 366 00:33:03,781 --> 00:33:06,147 Holy crap! 367 00:33:06,184 --> 00:33:07,845 You're worth every penny. 368 00:33:14,258 --> 00:33:16,249 - You should get going. - Mm-hm. 369 00:33:18,062 --> 00:33:19,996 OK, Yoda. 370 00:33:35,546 --> 00:33:37,844 To Amy! 371 00:33:47,492 --> 00:33:49,551 I thought you might need this. 372 00:33:50,395 --> 00:33:52,488 Silly me. Where was my head? 373 00:33:53,231 --> 00:33:55,563 - Bye. - Listen, why don't you stay 374 00:33:55,600 --> 00:33:58,228 - and have a little fiery drink with us, eh? - Uh... 375 00:33:58,269 --> 00:34:00,260 - It's fine. - Come on. 376 00:34:00,304 --> 00:34:02,295 You know you want to! 377 00:34:03,074 --> 00:34:05,838 - Oh, I can see why. - You're lovely. 378 00:34:05,877 --> 00:34:07,708 Isn't he lovely? Have you smelt him? 379 00:34:07,745 --> 00:34:09,736 He smells lovely! 380 00:34:09,781 --> 00:34:12,579 Can you believe Kat gets to shag this guy? 381 00:34:12,617 --> 00:34:17,452 No, really, you should send God a bottle of wine or a quiche or something. 382 00:34:22,593 --> 00:34:25,756 Look at those buns. Fresh from the bakery. 383 00:34:27,465 --> 00:34:30,662 It must feel great getting paid just for being you. 384 00:34:30,701 --> 00:34:33,101 - Who says I'm being me? - Excuse me. 385 00:34:33,137 --> 00:34:37,540 Amy, thank you for granting me a rare glimpse into a timeless female ritual. 386 00:34:37,575 --> 00:34:41,170 Here's to the husbands who've won you, the losers who've lost you 387 00:34:41,212 --> 00:34:44,670 and the lucky bastards who've yet to meet you. 388 00:34:45,283 --> 00:34:47,979 And to the cock in the henhouse. 389 00:35:18,649 --> 00:35:23,109 I can't believe you found him first. I am so depressed. 390 00:35:23,154 --> 00:35:26,988 Will somebody buy my hoo-hah a drink? 391 00:35:30,728 --> 00:35:33,993 You remember when we took the girls hiking in the Lake District? 392 00:35:34,031 --> 00:35:35,430 - No. - You do! 393 00:35:35,466 --> 00:35:38,458 Blistering heat in the morning, rained all afternoon. 394 00:35:38,503 --> 00:35:39,868 No. 395 00:35:39,904 --> 00:35:42,964 You backed your car over a copper's bicycle. 396 00:35:43,007 --> 00:35:45,635 - Sorry, no. - The Rat And Gherkin. 397 00:35:45,676 --> 00:35:48,167 - Splendid local scrumpy. - Mm. 398 00:35:48,212 --> 00:35:50,305 Amy wore that little bikini thing. 399 00:35:50,348 --> 00:35:53,283 But somehow it was Kat that got stung by nettles. 400 00:35:53,317 --> 00:35:56,684 Kat never said a word until Amy caught her scratching her arse. 401 00:35:56,721 --> 00:36:01,158 Then you rubbed it with a dock leaf to bring down the swelling. 402 00:36:02,126 --> 00:36:04,219 Yeah, I remember it. 403 00:36:05,830 --> 00:36:07,923 I didn't deserve her back then. 404 00:36:10,034 --> 00:36:11,729 And you do now? 405 00:36:18,843 --> 00:36:20,868 What is his problem? 406 00:36:22,580 --> 00:36:25,947 - What? - There's something about him I don't like. 407 00:36:25,983 --> 00:36:29,316 He's less than 90 per cent body fat and he's shagging your ex. 408 00:36:29,353 --> 00:36:31,378 No, that is not it. Look at him, 409 00:36:31,422 --> 00:36:35,358 he's walking around all American, like he owns the place. 410 00:36:43,201 --> 00:36:45,601 Oh, no! 411 00:36:46,938 --> 00:36:49,202 Come on, this is your last chance. 412 00:37:12,230 --> 00:37:13,891 Woody? 413 00:37:14,932 --> 00:37:18,800 - Not yet, but it's getting there! - It's getting there! 414 00:37:21,138 --> 00:37:24,107 Oh, my God! What are you doing here? 415 00:37:25,743 --> 00:37:29,645 I thought you were in San Francisco, or was it Nepal? 416 00:37:29,680 --> 00:37:33,138 Close. Sydney. But it turns out that I missed the rain. 417 00:37:33,184 --> 00:37:37,712 Did Kat tell you that she dumped you because of your funky breath? 418 00:37:38,889 --> 00:37:40,550 She's drunk. 419 00:37:40,591 --> 00:37:44,459 But I didn't... I didn't really dump you. Right? 420 00:37:45,396 --> 00:37:50,732 Hard. But it was understandable, you were one of the hottest girls in school. 421 00:37:50,768 --> 00:37:54,602 And we know that Kat was one of the hottest expats in school 422 00:37:54,639 --> 00:37:58,632 because she was voted Best Eyes and Brightest Smile 423 00:37:58,676 --> 00:38:01,474 and the Most Likely To Age Well. 424 00:38:06,217 --> 00:38:09,118 You're my half-sister but I whole love you. 425 00:38:15,359 --> 00:38:19,125 How about you get my half-sister a Seventh Hole? 426 00:38:19,964 --> 00:38:22,489 - Tequila. Tequila. - Sure. 427 00:38:31,742 --> 00:38:34,506 Are you all right? 428 00:38:34,545 --> 00:38:36,775 I don't know if I can do this. 429 00:38:38,249 --> 00:38:40,149 The Seventh Hole? 430 00:38:40,184 --> 00:38:42,618 No! The wedding. 431 00:38:43,888 --> 00:38:46,789 I shouldn't be allowed to get married. I shouldn't. 432 00:38:47,358 --> 00:38:49,485 What are you talking about? 433 00:38:53,197 --> 00:38:54,892 TJ! 434 00:38:58,235 --> 00:39:00,362 Come on! Come on! 435 00:39:06,143 --> 00:39:10,102 What's wrong with Jeffrey? As if I would sleep with a stripper! 436 00:39:10,147 --> 00:39:13,048 I'm about to get married. You have to... 437 00:39:15,920 --> 00:39:20,721 It's been my experience that a man in love doesn't want a prostitute. 438 00:39:22,426 --> 00:39:24,587 Eddie, you did the right thing. 439 00:39:33,637 --> 00:39:37,073 How do you know so much... 440 00:39:39,610 --> 00:39:41,771 about so much? 441 00:39:44,315 --> 00:39:46,306 I'm a hooker. 442 00:39:57,762 --> 00:39:59,855 I like that. 443 00:40:47,912 --> 00:40:51,439 I just don't feel very well. I'm gonna go. Give us a kiss. 444 00:40:53,984 --> 00:40:56,714 - Ladies... - How much do you rock, TJ? 445 00:40:56,754 --> 00:40:59,450 ...that was a top night. 446 00:41:00,524 --> 00:41:02,355 Top night! 447 00:41:17,741 --> 00:41:19,834 She's getting married! 448 00:42:30,548 --> 00:42:32,379 Are you OK? 449 00:42:49,366 --> 00:42:51,163 Ooh! Ow! 450 00:45:14,445 --> 00:45:16,606 - Morning. - Morning. 451 00:45:35,899 --> 00:45:37,890 Ahoy, there! 452 00:45:42,106 --> 00:45:43,767 Hi, Dad. 453 00:46:13,103 --> 00:46:17,130 I don't know what works for you but I brought you some black coffee 454 00:46:17,174 --> 00:46:21,008 and some stale crackers, egg and cheese sandwich and a Bloody Mary. 455 00:46:21,044 --> 00:46:24,946 That's very sweet of you. But I need to ask you something. 456 00:46:28,919 --> 00:46:30,978 What happened last night? 457 00:46:36,226 --> 00:46:37,887 Nothing. 458 00:46:54,278 --> 00:46:56,109 Thanks. 459 00:47:11,862 --> 00:47:15,354 - Is this for last night? - No! How could it be? Nothing happened. 460 00:47:15,399 --> 00:47:18,800 If I was gonna charge you, I said I'd tell you first. 461 00:47:18,836 --> 00:47:24,069 I didn't want you to think that I was expecting anything for free 462 00:47:24,107 --> 00:47:26,974 or that I was expecting anything at all. 463 00:47:27,010 --> 00:47:29,638 I mean, obviously I was expecting something 464 00:47:29,680 --> 00:47:33,047 or else I wouldn't have stopped at that ATM. 465 00:47:33,083 --> 00:47:35,415 Just so you know, you're 300 short. 466 00:47:40,123 --> 00:47:44,059 Wait, you're telling me that if something happened last night, 467 00:47:44,094 --> 00:47:45,686 I'd have to pay you $1,700? 468 00:47:45,729 --> 00:47:47,993 That's a down payment on a Ford Focus. 469 00:47:48,031 --> 00:47:49,828 Not dollars, pounds. 470 00:47:49,867 --> 00:47:52,734 Besides, it includes, you know... 471 00:47:52,769 --> 00:47:54,862 That's the extra 300. 472 00:47:58,141 --> 00:48:00,473 Are you a boatsman, son? 473 00:48:00,510 --> 00:48:03,138 I am now, sir. 474 00:48:03,180 --> 00:48:06,013 I'm glad someone's making use of her at last. 475 00:48:06,049 --> 00:48:08,210 The boat, I mean. 476 00:48:09,686 --> 00:48:12,018 "To defile. " Four letters. 477 00:48:12,055 --> 00:48:14,046 - Good morning, Daddy. - Ah. 478 00:48:17,461 --> 00:48:22,023 - What if I didn't want you to do that to me? - The 300's for you doing it to me. 479 00:48:22,065 --> 00:48:25,933 If anything had happened, it would have been one of the highlights, for you. 480 00:48:25,969 --> 00:48:29,905 - But nothing did. - That's why you get to keep your money. 481 00:48:30,707 --> 00:48:32,470 The wedding dance is 482 00:48:32,509 --> 00:48:36,969 the most important dance moment in a person's life. 483 00:48:38,282 --> 00:48:41,274 A room full of friends and family, 484 00:48:41,952 --> 00:48:44,512 watching, smiling, 485 00:48:44,554 --> 00:48:47,216 betting on how long the marriage will last. 486 00:48:48,258 --> 00:48:51,056 All you'll have is each other 487 00:48:51,094 --> 00:48:54,086 and whatever skills you acquire today. 488 00:48:55,933 --> 00:48:57,594 And pair off. 489 00:49:07,277 --> 00:49:09,802 Now, your left foot. Her right foot. 490 00:49:10,614 --> 00:49:13,674 Good. And we'll try to glide across the floor. 491 00:49:14,151 --> 00:49:17,587 Come a little bit closer together. Moving. 492 00:49:18,255 --> 00:49:20,621 Trying to turn. 493 00:49:20,657 --> 00:49:22,989 What's the matter, Nick? 494 00:49:23,026 --> 00:49:24,823 Two left feet? 495 00:49:26,196 --> 00:49:27,788 Oh! 496 00:50:33,296 --> 00:50:36,322 When I told you I'd never done a wedding before, 497 00:50:36,366 --> 00:50:39,392 it wasn't because I'd never been asked. 498 00:50:41,204 --> 00:50:43,195 I'd just never said yes. 499 00:50:45,108 --> 00:50:46,769 Why'd you say yes to me? 500 00:50:48,712 --> 00:50:51,840 There was something in your voice on the phone that day. 501 00:50:54,184 --> 00:50:56,175 Desperation? 502 00:50:57,788 --> 00:50:59,722 I think it was hope. 503 00:50:59,756 --> 00:51:03,123 Get a move on, you lovebirds. I'm getting married in the morning. 504 00:51:32,055 --> 00:51:35,889 - Ah, hello, Bambi. - Darling, please don't do that. 505 00:51:42,899 --> 00:51:44,890 Oh, wow. 506 00:51:46,436 --> 00:51:48,427 That's a big bed. 507 00:52:04,020 --> 00:52:06,318 You know what pisses me off? 508 00:52:06,356 --> 00:52:11,419 I've been spilling my guts all weekend and I don't know anything about you. 509 00:52:12,762 --> 00:52:15,026 I'm allergic to fabric softener. 510 00:52:15,899 --> 00:52:20,302 I'm majoring in comparative literature at Brown. I hate anchovies. 511 00:52:22,139 --> 00:52:25,131 I think I'd miss you even if we'd never met. 512 00:52:32,616 --> 00:52:34,550 Come on! 513 00:52:39,890 --> 00:52:43,553 I'm a little concerned... I'm just... It makes me nervous... 514 00:52:43,593 --> 00:52:47,085 You know, I might just call you. 515 00:52:47,831 --> 00:52:51,927 But if I did, I would lose, because my hand is complete shite. 516 00:52:51,968 --> 00:52:53,435 Ohhh. 517 00:52:55,505 --> 00:52:56,904 - I'm in. - Come on. 518 00:52:56,940 --> 00:52:59,238 There's gotta be something wrong with him. 519 00:52:59,276 --> 00:53:02,677 I bet his thingy bends, doesn't it? Got a little kink in it. 520 00:53:02,712 --> 00:53:05,806 Oh, no, don't tell me. It's bloody perfect. 521 00:53:06,583 --> 00:53:09,211 I'm going to see you. 522 00:53:11,154 --> 00:53:13,452 Looky, looky here. 523 00:53:13,490 --> 00:53:15,958 A full house. 524 00:53:15,992 --> 00:53:18,119 Oh-ho-ho! 525 00:53:18,161 --> 00:53:22,154 Has anyone seen my future wife? She'll kill me if I don't serve her first. 526 00:53:22,199 --> 00:53:25,691 Have you guys ever had a real honest-to-God fight, ever? 527 00:53:25,735 --> 00:53:28,260 - Yes, of course. - Yeah, right. 528 00:53:28,305 --> 00:53:32,401 Well, apparently, makeup sex is the best kind. 529 00:53:32,442 --> 00:53:34,433 Not that I'm ever going to find out. 530 00:53:34,477 --> 00:53:37,139 Give me that! 531 00:53:37,180 --> 00:53:39,341 - Come on! - No, no! 532 00:53:39,382 --> 00:53:41,373 - Don't! - Come on! 533 00:53:46,089 --> 00:53:48,785 You seem to have a way with women. 534 00:53:49,492 --> 00:53:52,928 Why don't you go and rustle up the bride? Get her to join the party. 535 00:53:57,000 --> 00:54:00,492 Why are you bringing this up now? I love Ed. 536 00:54:00,537 --> 00:54:03,665 - What do you want from me? - I want you to tell me... 537 00:54:07,644 --> 00:54:11,307 Blue shirt or... white shirt for the, er, rehearsal dinner? 538 00:54:16,853 --> 00:54:18,514 Sorry to interrupt. 539 00:54:19,756 --> 00:54:22,224 Your dad sent me. 540 00:54:22,259 --> 00:54:24,250 What for? 541 00:54:25,195 --> 00:54:27,356 To make sure you're OK. 542 00:54:32,869 --> 00:54:35,531 Kat, could I have a word? It'll only take a moment. 543 00:54:35,572 --> 00:54:39,975 Let me think. You stole seven years of her life with your bullshit and your charm 544 00:54:40,010 --> 00:54:41,910 and now you'd like just a moment? 545 00:54:41,945 --> 00:54:44,505 Sure. Go right ahead. 546 00:54:48,818 --> 00:54:52,879 Thanks for the solidarity, Mum, but next time a little less information. 547 00:54:54,491 --> 00:54:56,925 Do you believe a place has a memory? 548 00:54:56,960 --> 00:55:02,865 Even before Ed and I started dating, we all used to come up here in the summer 549 00:55:02,899 --> 00:55:04,890 and spend weekends. 550 00:55:14,210 --> 00:55:16,974 God, I hope it doesn't remember everything. 551 00:55:18,948 --> 00:55:21,678 No matter how certain one is of one's position 552 00:55:21,718 --> 00:55:23,913 of what one should or shouldn't do, 553 00:55:23,953 --> 00:55:26,114 one sometimes discovers 554 00:55:26,156 --> 00:55:30,855 that one is not as one would have hoped one would have been. 555 00:55:31,394 --> 00:55:34,886 - What exactly are you trying to say? - I'm sorry. 556 00:55:34,931 --> 00:55:38,526 Look, I feel like I need to tell you something. 557 00:55:38,568 --> 00:55:42,129 - You're not even listening. - I'm sorry. I'll be back in a minute. 558 00:55:49,045 --> 00:55:52,173 Hey, is everything OK? 559 00:55:55,652 --> 00:55:57,643 Yeah. 560 00:55:59,856 --> 00:56:01,483 Yeah. 561 00:56:06,830 --> 00:56:08,821 Anchovy, Nick? 562 00:56:08,865 --> 00:56:11,026 I remember the day I met Kat. 563 00:56:11,067 --> 00:56:13,058 It was in New York. 564 00:56:13,103 --> 00:56:15,264 I'd been seeing Bunny for a few months 565 00:56:15,305 --> 00:56:20,004 and she finally trusted me enough to meet her kid. 566 00:56:20,043 --> 00:56:26,278 So I'm over at her place and in walks this little monster. 567 00:56:27,817 --> 00:56:30,149 That was it. I was a goner. 568 00:56:31,354 --> 00:56:33,345 That was the day I became a dad. 569 00:56:34,657 --> 00:56:38,991 You know, Nick, you think it's going to get easier as they get older, 570 00:56:39,028 --> 00:56:42,020 that you're going to worry about them less. 571 00:56:43,233 --> 00:56:46,862 Or that you're going to trust the world more. 572 00:56:47,704 --> 00:56:49,865 But that's just not how it happens. 573 00:57:01,751 --> 00:57:04,879 This may not make much sense to you, sir, 574 00:57:04,921 --> 00:57:08,755 but I'd like to ask your permission to date your daughter. 575 00:57:11,327 --> 00:57:13,318 I thought you already were. 576 00:57:28,711 --> 00:57:34,081 - I blame... I blame Tony Peepants. - No. 577 00:57:34,117 --> 00:57:35,914 Let's have the story. Kat, come on. 578 00:57:35,952 --> 00:57:39,683 - No. - I have to initiate Nick into our family. 579 00:57:39,722 --> 00:57:45,592 I blame Tony for why my two girls just don't seem to be able to get along. 580 00:57:46,129 --> 00:57:49,826 Don't deny it. You barely tolerate each other. 581 00:57:49,866 --> 00:57:54,235 Come on. It's true. The only thing you've got in common is you're both attracted to me. 582 00:57:54,270 --> 00:57:56,067 It started after we moved here. 583 00:57:56,105 --> 00:58:01,065 My two girls got into a fight over Tony Peepants and have never made up since. 584 00:58:01,110 --> 00:58:03,442 Apparently, Kat and I were inseparable. 585 00:58:03,480 --> 00:58:06,074 If Kat ate a banana, Amy threw it up. 586 00:58:06,115 --> 00:58:08,174 If Amy threw it up, Kat ate it. 587 00:58:09,552 --> 00:58:14,251 So we were eating and throwing up together in harmony 588 00:58:14,290 --> 00:58:16,758 until Tony walked me home from school one day. 589 00:58:16,793 --> 00:58:18,192 He was my first boyfriend. 590 00:58:18,228 --> 00:58:21,220 Tony ignored Kat because he wanted to play with me. 591 00:58:21,264 --> 00:58:25,462 Anyway, the point of the story is that Tony ended up with a chair in his face. 592 00:58:25,502 --> 00:58:28,630 It was plastic and child-sized. 593 00:58:29,639 --> 00:58:35,100 - As I recall, there were stitches involved. - Come on, Bunny, 15 stitches. 594 00:58:35,144 --> 00:58:37,612 So is that when he peed in his pants? 595 00:58:37,647 --> 00:58:40,081 He cried a lot, but there was no peeing. 596 00:58:40,116 --> 00:58:43,313 So what's with the nickname? 597 00:58:47,357 --> 00:58:49,655 I have absolutely no idea. 598 00:58:52,595 --> 00:58:54,586 Let me get some more wine. 599 00:58:55,532 --> 00:58:57,762 Would you marry me if I asked? 600 00:58:57,800 --> 00:59:00,098 That was a yes. Did you see that? 601 00:59:11,047 --> 00:59:15,245 And you know, I thought perhaps you... Bollocks. Sorry. 602 00:59:15,985 --> 00:59:20,820 I had no idea this would be so difficult. I just feel like I owe you an explanation. 603 00:59:20,857 --> 00:59:23,291 Relax, relax. It's fine. 604 00:59:24,227 --> 00:59:26,218 I promise. 605 00:59:28,665 --> 00:59:33,068 And I should probably admit that... 606 00:59:35,004 --> 00:59:38,906 I brought Nick with me to torture you, slowly, 607 00:59:38,942 --> 00:59:40,933 for the entire weekend. 608 00:59:41,778 --> 00:59:46,181 But then, I don't know, something happened and now... 609 00:59:46,215 --> 00:59:50,948 I hope this doesn't hurt your feelings but I'm just sick of you and me. 610 00:59:51,788 --> 00:59:57,556 Of our whole story, so come on, let's just go upstairs and eat some tiramisu. 611 01:00:01,130 --> 01:00:03,496 I slept with your sister. 612 01:00:13,242 --> 01:00:17,804 - I'm sorry? - Well, I shagged Amy, two years ago. 613 01:00:17,847 --> 01:00:20,680 That's why I broke it off with you. 614 01:00:20,717 --> 01:00:26,087 And then after you left, sod it, we kept at it like rabbits, 615 01:00:26,122 --> 01:00:31,253 until we both realized it was absolutely mad and, obviously, morally wrong. 616 01:00:33,696 --> 01:00:36,665 And then that was it. 617 01:00:36,699 --> 01:00:42,103 But last Christmas, when Ed proposed, 618 01:00:42,138 --> 01:00:45,904 I realized... I'm in love with her. 619 01:00:51,848 --> 01:00:54,339 Good Lord, say something, please. 620 01:01:10,433 --> 01:01:12,867 Oh, my God, he's told you, hasn't he? 621 01:01:13,703 --> 01:01:17,195 - You knew? - Kat, I'm so sorry. I'm so... 622 01:01:27,250 --> 01:01:29,718 Kat. Kat, please. 623 01:01:29,752 --> 01:01:32,050 Kat, please don't say anything. 624 01:01:36,626 --> 01:01:38,321 I can't believe you told her. 625 01:02:10,693 --> 01:02:12,888 What's going on? 626 01:02:12,929 --> 01:02:14,920 Nothing. 627 01:02:16,699 --> 01:02:18,462 It doesn't look like nothing. 628 01:02:19,502 --> 01:02:22,027 Now is not the time to catch on, Ed. 629 01:02:24,373 --> 01:02:27,274 OK. Good. 630 01:02:40,256 --> 01:02:43,282 Leave me alone. You knew and you didn't tell me. 631 01:02:43,326 --> 01:02:46,818 - Wait up. - I can't believe I trusted you. 632 01:02:46,863 --> 01:02:48,990 Come on. You've got to stop running. 633 01:02:49,031 --> 01:02:52,728 - How could you not have told me? - What did you expect me to say? 634 01:02:53,536 --> 01:02:56,096 You let me make a fool of myself. 635 01:02:56,139 --> 01:03:00,974 You lied to me, but I guess I shouldn't be surprised because that's what you do. 636 01:03:01,010 --> 01:03:03,137 That's who you are. You're a liar. 637 01:03:04,247 --> 01:03:06,841 You're judging me? That's a good one. 638 01:03:06,883 --> 01:03:09,374 You're going to point a finger at me, 639 01:03:09,418 --> 01:03:13,411 the guy that you hired to pretend to be your boyfriend? 640 01:03:13,456 --> 01:03:18,052 You're right. I was so desperate to make everyone believe that I was happy 641 01:03:18,094 --> 01:03:20,790 that I paid $6,000 for a lie. 642 01:03:20,830 --> 01:03:25,529 And, at the end of the day, the only one who ended up falling for it was me. 643 01:03:26,469 --> 01:03:28,562 I wish I could say it was worth it. 644 01:03:30,173 --> 01:03:32,767 Go ahead, Kat, hate me. 645 01:03:33,609 --> 01:03:37,705 I think you're running out of steam on this whole Jeffrey thing anyhow. 646 01:03:37,747 --> 01:03:42,878 Maybe now you'll be able to hold on to this long enough to ruin your next relationship. 647 01:03:56,899 --> 01:04:00,391 - Nick. - I'm just checking into a hotel. 648 01:04:00,436 --> 01:04:02,961 Don't be ridiculous. It's late. 649 01:04:03,973 --> 01:04:05,964 Take the car. 650 01:04:12,949 --> 01:04:16,112 Actually, the boathouse is empty. 651 01:04:17,386 --> 01:04:21,880 Look, I don't know what's going on with you two but I'm sure you'll work it out. 652 01:04:25,928 --> 01:04:30,922 You couldn't be more perfect if she'd picked you out of a catalog. 653 01:04:36,038 --> 01:04:38,029 Thanks, Ed. 654 01:04:48,284 --> 01:04:49,945 Hey. 655 01:04:53,289 --> 01:04:54,847 Hey. 656 01:04:58,127 --> 01:05:03,963 I just... I wanted to say thank you for not outing me in front of Ed. 657 01:05:06,802 --> 01:05:11,205 I want to tell him, just not the night before our wedding. 658 01:05:11,240 --> 01:05:14,573 You know, with these things, timing is everything. 659 01:05:23,753 --> 01:05:25,744 You're right. 660 01:05:26,756 --> 01:05:28,451 You should time it right, 661 01:05:28,991 --> 01:05:33,621 so that when he hears that you repeatedly screwed his best friend, 662 01:05:33,663 --> 01:05:37,121 he won't feel like the world is collapsing and there's no escape 663 01:05:37,166 --> 01:05:40,363 because you tricked him into marrying you. 664 01:05:47,576 --> 01:05:50,704 - Kat... - Don't worry. Your wedding will be perfect. 665 01:05:50,746 --> 01:05:55,843 Tomorrow I'll say all the right things and you'll deal with Ed when you're ready. 666 01:05:55,885 --> 01:06:00,584 But right now, tonight, I'm not going to pretend it's OK. 667 01:06:14,670 --> 01:06:17,138 And that's your first flight out? 668 01:06:19,375 --> 01:06:22,037 - All right, thanks. - # In Paris and Rome 669 01:06:47,436 --> 01:06:50,769 - I'm OK. - # Someone else's life 670 01:06:54,043 --> 01:06:56,034 I don't believe you. 671 01:06:56,946 --> 01:06:59,107 I'm fine, really. 672 01:07:01,517 --> 01:07:05,749 Nothing a bottle of Jack and a straight razor couldn't fix. 673 01:07:09,859 --> 01:07:11,850 Anyway, it doesn't matter. 674 01:07:11,894 --> 01:07:13,953 It's Amy's day. 675 01:07:31,614 --> 01:07:33,605 Get in the car, darling. 676 01:07:42,725 --> 01:07:44,716 No, no. Smile. 677 01:08:10,052 --> 01:08:11,883 Hello. 678 01:08:14,723 --> 01:08:16,714 I've been looking for you. 679 01:08:21,664 --> 01:08:24,258 So, why did you let him go? 680 01:08:30,306 --> 01:08:32,900 - It's complicated, Dad. - Right. 681 01:08:32,942 --> 01:08:35,877 It probably wouldn't have worked out anyway, huh? 682 01:08:40,850 --> 01:08:45,549 I remember reading a fascinating article in the New York Times Magazine once, 683 01:08:45,588 --> 01:08:48,056 where this guy said, 684 01:08:48,090 --> 01:08:52,789 "Every woman has the exact love life she wants. " 685 01:08:54,296 --> 01:08:56,890 You know what? I agree with him. 686 01:08:58,167 --> 01:09:01,659 But I refuse to believe that this is what you want, Kat. 687 01:09:02,638 --> 01:09:05,038 Ever since you were little, 688 01:09:05,074 --> 01:09:08,566 you've always worried about what other people think. 689 01:09:09,612 --> 01:09:14,447 Now, come on. What do you think? Is he the guy for you? 690 01:09:21,524 --> 01:09:23,014 Then go and get him. 691 01:09:51,420 --> 01:09:54,912 Hello, darling. Your mother said you wanted to have a quick word. 692 01:09:54,957 --> 01:09:56,948 No, no, no, I... 693 01:10:01,530 --> 01:10:05,022 There's something you should know before you marry me. 694 01:10:05,067 --> 01:10:06,295 What is it? 695 01:10:57,086 --> 01:11:00,112 I wanted to tell you but I was afraid you'd never forgive me 696 01:11:00,155 --> 01:11:02,487 and I just... I love you so much. 697 01:11:03,325 --> 01:11:05,555 I'm sorry. 698 01:11:05,594 --> 01:11:11,829 I knew you were seeing someone else when we finally got together, but not Jeffrey. 699 01:11:13,902 --> 01:11:16,302 Does Kat know? 700 01:11:17,673 --> 01:11:19,641 Jeffrey told her last night. 701 01:11:25,147 --> 01:11:26,978 Excuse me. 702 01:11:34,990 --> 01:11:36,651 Ed? 703 01:11:41,030 --> 01:11:44,022 Ed... Calm down, Ed. 704 01:11:44,066 --> 01:11:45,465 Ed! 705 01:11:47,736 --> 01:11:48,998 TJ! 706 01:11:55,044 --> 01:11:57,012 Ah! 707 01:12:01,116 --> 01:12:05,212 Ed, calm down! It's all sorted! She wants you! 708 01:12:05,254 --> 01:12:07,882 I've given up! What's the problem? 709 01:12:07,923 --> 01:12:10,084 You back-stabbing weasel! 710 01:12:10,125 --> 01:12:13,891 That's not fair. It was before you guys were even dating. 711 01:12:13,929 --> 01:12:17,194 But you were engaged to her sister. 712 01:12:17,232 --> 01:12:19,928 Ed, calm down! 713 01:12:21,036 --> 01:12:24,563 We can talk about this like civilized human beings. 714 01:12:31,714 --> 01:12:34,182 I look like a total wanker, don't I? 715 01:12:34,216 --> 01:12:35,808 Yeah, kind of. 716 01:12:41,890 --> 01:12:46,293 Get in the car, Ed. He's halfway to France by now. 717 01:12:47,563 --> 01:12:48,552 Whoa! 718 01:12:58,040 --> 01:13:01,908 I trust you've enjoyed your trip to England. 719 01:13:01,944 --> 01:13:04,606 Yeah, it was fantastic. Thanks, Eddie. 720 01:13:07,383 --> 01:13:10,250 You know, I felt sorry for you last night. 721 01:13:11,253 --> 01:13:16,213 I was just sitting there like some smug arse, thinking, "Aren't I a lucky sod?" 722 01:13:18,127 --> 01:13:23,588 I forgave her when I thought it was just some random bloke. 723 01:13:25,667 --> 01:13:27,658 But not Jeffrey. 724 01:13:31,006 --> 01:13:33,668 I've had her up on a pedestal ever since... 725 01:13:37,813 --> 01:13:40,111 ever since I put her up there. 726 01:13:41,950 --> 01:13:44,111 What a mess I've made, huh? 727 01:13:56,365 --> 01:13:58,356 I'm so sorry. 728 01:14:05,407 --> 01:14:07,568 The hardest thing's loving someone 729 01:14:07,609 --> 01:14:10,840 and then having the courage to let them love you back. 730 01:14:18,220 --> 01:14:20,484 But if you know her shit and she knows yours 731 01:14:20,522 --> 01:14:24,925 and at the end of the day, you still would rather give up than try... 732 01:14:28,497 --> 01:14:30,931 nothing's ever gonna be worth it. 733 01:14:37,339 --> 01:14:40,172 Maybe think about it this way. 734 01:14:40,209 --> 01:14:42,803 You go back, 735 01:14:42,845 --> 01:14:46,508 you get to spend the rest of your life having really great makeup sex. 736 01:14:50,853 --> 01:14:53,014 - Ed? - Must run! 737 01:14:54,223 --> 01:14:55,952 Hi. 738 01:14:58,160 --> 01:14:59,821 Hi. 739 01:15:02,064 --> 01:15:06,694 Last night, when we were fighting, I thought this was over. 740 01:15:08,904 --> 01:15:13,967 And I was going to leave you alone and just take off but... 741 01:15:16,278 --> 01:15:22,877 Then I realized I'd rather fight with you than make love with anyone else. 742 01:15:53,782 --> 01:15:56,774 - I should get going. - What? No, you can't. 743 01:15:56,818 --> 01:15:58,809 I have to. 744 01:15:58,854 --> 01:16:00,685 I'm the best man. 745 01:16:59,514 --> 01:17:01,505 Let's do it. 746 01:17:21,136 --> 01:17:25,539 Ed, there's no one in the world who knows 747 01:17:25,574 --> 01:17:28,372 how to love my baby sister better than you. 748 01:17:28,844 --> 01:17:30,539 Be good to one another. 749 01:17:30,579 --> 01:17:32,570 To Amy and Ed. 750 01:17:32,614 --> 01:17:34,912 Amy and Ed. 751 01:17:44,913 --> 01:17:47,713 Ripped by: SkyFury