1 00:00:56,765 --> 00:00:58,058 'Market reports today' 2 00:00:58,183 --> 00:01:01,144 'barrows and gilts at 220 to 260 pounds' 3 00:01:01,270 --> 00:01:03,689 'are lower at $40. Uh, sows are steady.' 4 00:01:03,814 --> 00:01:06,358 '300 to 500 pounds, 34 to 37 dollars.' 5 00:01:06,483 --> 00:01:07,651 'Goin' over to the feeder cattle' 6 00:01:07,776 --> 00:01:09,278 'beef steers, 120 to 150..' 7 00:01:12,406 --> 00:01:13,824 'The way I like to do it is I, uh' 8 00:01:13,949 --> 00:01:16,493 'I take one can of cream of mushroom soup' 9 00:01:16,618 --> 00:01:18,453 'and then one package of egg noodles.' 10 00:01:18,579 --> 00:01:21,540 'I like the egg noodles better than the Italian ones.' 11 00:01:21,665 --> 00:01:23,083 'I like to put..' 12 00:01:26,211 --> 00:01:27,713 'If we look at what the Lord said' 13 00:01:27,838 --> 00:01:29,214 'in the "Book Of Revelation'" 14 00:01:29,339 --> 00:01:32,342 'you can be sure that there's a price to pay' 15 00:01:32,467 --> 00:01:34,511 'for the way of the flesh' 16 00:01:34,636 --> 00:01:36,013 'and that price will be paid if you don't..' 17 00:01:37,764 --> 00:01:39,266 'Here's the wind-up' 18 00:01:39,391 --> 00:01:41,810 'and the pitch.' 19 00:01:41,935 --> 00:01:44,104 'And it's two and two, two and two..' 20 00:01:52,613 --> 00:01:54,323 'Before you just say, "Honey, I think we have to have' 21 00:01:54,448 --> 00:01:56,199 'some couple's counseling." I mean, I think we've a problem.' 22 00:01:56,325 --> 00:01:58,160 'I can't leave a cup here for..' 23 00:02:08,670 --> 00:02:10,297 'Alright. It's time for traffic on the fives' 24 00:02:10,422 --> 00:02:11,923 'and let's find out what's going on with your drive.' 25 00:02:12,049 --> 00:02:14,051 'Let's go to chopper. Chopper, what's happening?' 26 00:02:14,176 --> 00:02:16,887 'Alright, Lettie, we got a 15-minute, uh, wait, 494.' 27 00:02:17,012 --> 00:02:18,930 'There's an accident working at the Spaghetti Junction' 28 00:02:19,056 --> 00:02:21,475 'at 630, but it still will make a very slow go..' 29 00:02:42,245 --> 00:02:44,331 A quiet night in a city that knows 30 00:02:44,456 --> 00:02:46,249 how to keep its secrets. 31 00:02:46,375 --> 00:02:48,710 But one man is still looking for the answers 32 00:02:48,835 --> 00:02:51,254 to life's persistent questions. 33 00:02:56,093 --> 00:02:57,719 That's me. 34 00:02:57,844 --> 00:02:59,846 Or it used to be. 35 00:02:59,971 --> 00:03:02,265 It was a rainy Saturday night in St. Paul 36 00:03:02,391 --> 00:03:04,685 and I had just finished off a grilled cheese sandwich 37 00:03:04,810 --> 00:03:06,520 with beans for a chaser 38 00:03:06,645 --> 00:03:09,189 and it was time to head for work across the street. 39 00:03:20,492 --> 00:03:22,160 I'm a private eye. 40 00:03:22,285 --> 00:03:25,330 Noir's the name. Guy Noir. 41 00:03:25,455 --> 00:03:27,541 But I'd taken temporary employment 42 00:03:27,666 --> 00:03:31,461 about six years before doing security for a radio show 43 00:03:31,586 --> 00:03:34,715 called a Prairie Home Companion 44 00:03:34,840 --> 00:03:37,801 on account of a serious cash-flow problem 45 00:03:37,926 --> 00:03:39,886 due to a lack of missing heiresses 46 00:03:40,011 --> 00:03:42,431 and dead tycoons lying in the solarium 47 00:03:42,556 --> 00:03:46,184 with lipstick stains on their smoking jackets. 48 00:03:46,309 --> 00:03:49,396 In other words, I was broke. 49 00:03:49,521 --> 00:03:51,064 This radio show was done 50 00:03:51,189 --> 00:03:53,316 out of an old theater called The Fitzgerald 51 00:03:53,442 --> 00:03:54,693 and it had been on the air 52 00:03:54,818 --> 00:03:56,862 since Jesus was in the third grade. 53 00:03:56,987 --> 00:03:58,989 But it was still pulling in a few hundred people 54 00:03:59,114 --> 00:04:00,907 on Saturday nights. 55 00:04:01,032 --> 00:04:03,535 It was a live radio variety show 56 00:04:03,660 --> 00:04:05,954 the kind that died 50 years ago 57 00:04:06,079 --> 00:04:11,209 but somebody forgot to tell them until this night. 58 00:04:11,334 --> 00:04:13,086 A big corporation down in Texas 59 00:04:13,211 --> 00:04:15,046 had bought up the radio station 60 00:04:15,172 --> 00:04:17,799 and their axeman, a guy named Cruett 61 00:04:17,924 --> 00:04:20,552 was on his way to St. Paul to shut the thing down 62 00:04:20,677 --> 00:04:23,096 and turn the theater into a parking lot. 63 00:04:26,183 --> 00:04:28,351 It was curtains and everybody knew it 64 00:04:28,477 --> 00:04:30,270 but nobody said so. 65 00:04:30,395 --> 00:04:32,272 They were Midwesterners. 66 00:04:32,397 --> 00:04:36,485 They felt like if you ignored bad news it might go away. 67 00:04:36,610 --> 00:04:40,322 Not my philosophy, but I'm not from here. 68 00:04:40,447 --> 00:04:43,074 Stay on the edge of the crowd. Keep your eyes open. 69 00:04:43,200 --> 00:04:45,243 That's my motto. 70 00:04:45,368 --> 00:04:48,455 It was my last night of gainful employment 71 00:04:48,580 --> 00:04:51,958 and I had a feeling it was maybe going to be interesting. 72 00:04:56,296 --> 00:04:59,758 ♪ I used to work in Chicago ♪ 73 00:04:59,883 --> 00:05:03,178 ♪ At a convenience store ♪ 74 00:05:03,303 --> 00:05:07,682 ♪ I used to work in Chicago I did but I don't ♪ 75 00:05:07,808 --> 00:05:09,559 'Ladies and gentlemen, we are now at ten minutes' 76 00:05:09,684 --> 00:05:11,353 'from broadcast, please. Ten minutes.' 77 00:05:11,478 --> 00:05:13,772 ♪ A lady walked in with some porcelain skin ♪ 78 00:05:13,897 --> 00:05:17,984 ♪ And I asked her what she came in for ♪ 79 00:05:18,109 --> 00:05:21,196 ♪ Liquor she said and lick her I did ♪ 80 00:05:21,321 --> 00:05:25,617 ♪ And I don't work there anymore ♪♪ 81 00:05:25,742 --> 00:05:28,703 Molly. What. Okay, okay. 82 00:05:28,829 --> 00:05:30,205 Jesus, the schedule. 83 00:05:30,330 --> 00:05:32,040 Uh.. 84 00:05:32,165 --> 00:05:33,708 Where's my pencil? I gotta show you some changes. 85 00:05:33,834 --> 00:05:35,752 Where's my pencil? I just put it down here a second ago. 86 00:05:35,877 --> 00:05:37,087 Where'd you put it last? 87 00:05:37,212 --> 00:05:38,380 I just had it here a second ago. 88 00:05:38,505 --> 00:05:40,841 - Oh, it's-it's-- - Don't mess with those. 89 00:05:40,966 --> 00:05:42,843 Hey, hey, hey. Please, move that back. 90 00:05:42,968 --> 00:05:44,678 This one will make the.. 91 00:05:44,803 --> 00:05:47,430 This will make the wife green-eyed with envy. 92 00:05:47,556 --> 00:05:50,600 - Ooh! Is she here? - One more. 93 00:05:50,725 --> 00:05:52,102 Do you think she's coming to the studio? 94 00:05:52,227 --> 00:05:53,979 Cuddle up a little bit. There you go. 95 00:05:55,397 --> 00:05:57,524 Hey, Guy. How are you tonight? 96 00:05:57,649 --> 00:05:58,984 I need a little help from you. 97 00:05:59,109 --> 00:06:00,193 Take these Johnson girl T-shirts. 98 00:06:00,318 --> 00:06:01,236 Have someone take 'em up front. 99 00:06:01,361 --> 00:06:02,279 I'll take care of it. 100 00:06:02,404 --> 00:06:03,989 Nice tie. 101 00:06:04,114 --> 00:06:05,407 'Well, it's about damn time.' 102 00:06:05,532 --> 00:06:06,533 The very tardy Johnson girls. 103 00:06:06,658 --> 00:06:07,617 Hey, Al. 104 00:06:07,742 --> 00:06:09,119 Givin' me a heart attack here. 105 00:06:09,244 --> 00:06:11,788 - What is this? Rewrites? - Come on, girls. 106 00:06:11,913 --> 00:06:13,290 What's wrong with the old script? 107 00:06:13,415 --> 00:06:14,749 How does that feel? 108 00:06:14,875 --> 00:06:16,668 Give me a little sound effects on that one. 109 00:06:16,793 --> 00:06:17,878 'Ladies and gentlemen, we are now' 110 00:06:18,003 --> 00:06:19,462 'at six minutes to broadcast.' 111 00:06:19,588 --> 00:06:20,964 'Six minutes from broadcast, please.' 112 00:06:21,089 --> 00:06:22,340 - That's the-that's the-- - That's, uh.. 113 00:06:22,465 --> 00:06:24,175 Hey, Rich, that's that Honolulu mama 114 00:06:24,301 --> 00:06:26,219 how she could dance in her pink pajamas 115 00:06:26,344 --> 00:06:28,430 when she took off her oahu oahu oahu. 116 00:06:28,555 --> 00:06:30,932 No, it's an old carter family song, right? 117 00:06:31,057 --> 00:06:34,269 - A what? - Carter family, sweetheart. 118 00:06:34,394 --> 00:06:36,605 Just like us, only famous. 119 00:06:36,730 --> 00:06:38,690 Now, how long you been doin' this? 120 00:06:38,815 --> 00:06:41,234 Doin' what? Puttin' my pants on? 121 00:06:41,359 --> 00:06:42,944 How long you been doin' radio? 122 00:06:43,069 --> 00:06:44,779 Oh. 123 00:06:44,905 --> 00:06:47,365 I don't know. 30 some years, I guess. 124 00:06:47,490 --> 00:06:49,534 Started out in Mark Twain days 125 00:06:49,659 --> 00:06:52,996 Mississippi River, and they hired me to play Huck Finn. 126 00:06:53,121 --> 00:06:56,875 'I was running a raft on the Mississippi' 127 00:06:57,000 --> 00:07:00,045 'and carrying people across, and, uh' 128 00:07:00,170 --> 00:07:02,589 'it ran into the wake of a steamboat.' 129 00:07:02,714 --> 00:07:04,549 Mr. Keillor? We need you on stage. 130 00:07:04,674 --> 00:07:05,842 Fine. I'm right there. 131 00:07:05,967 --> 00:07:07,177 Is this the story about the guy 132 00:07:07,302 --> 00:07:08,595 who ends up hangin' from a kite 133 00:07:08,720 --> 00:07:09,888 bein' pulled by a boat 134 00:07:10,013 --> 00:07:11,097 with his shorts around his ankles? 135 00:07:11,222 --> 00:07:12,474 No. No, it's a different story 136 00:07:12,599 --> 00:07:13,808 about a pontoon boat. 137 00:07:13,934 --> 00:07:16,353 Oh! Look at this old house. 138 00:07:16,478 --> 00:07:18,063 Goodbye, old house. 139 00:07:18,188 --> 00:07:19,314 Goodbye, old porch. 140 00:07:19,439 --> 00:07:20,982 Goodbye, old Guy. 141 00:07:21,107 --> 00:07:22,609 Hey, Guy, what are they gonna do 142 00:07:22,734 --> 00:07:25,862 with this house, you think? Huh? 143 00:07:25,987 --> 00:07:28,198 I figure it had something to do 144 00:07:28,323 --> 00:07:31,451 with the dumpster that showed up yesterday. 145 00:07:31,576 --> 00:07:32,953 Oh, my God. Honey, listen. 146 00:07:33,078 --> 00:07:35,038 I brought you that cute little dress-- 147 00:07:35,163 --> 00:07:37,332 'I already told you, I don't like the dress.' 148 00:07:37,457 --> 00:07:39,209 At least try it on. I want to see it on you. 149 00:07:39,334 --> 00:07:40,669 You try it on. I don't want to try it on. 150 00:07:40,794 --> 00:07:42,963 It's ugly. It's the color of vomit. 151 00:07:46,967 --> 00:07:48,176 Oh, sorry. 152 00:07:52,222 --> 00:07:54,599 Old man Soderberg was one of those people 153 00:07:54,724 --> 00:07:58,103 who was on that raft and, uh, he went over the rail 154 00:07:58,228 --> 00:08:02,691 and into the river and I went in for him 'cause he couldn't swim. 155 00:08:02,816 --> 00:08:05,777 So, I pulled him out. 156 00:08:05,902 --> 00:08:07,946 - You saved his life? - Well, not really. 157 00:08:08,071 --> 00:08:10,532 The river was shallow at that point but he didn't know that 158 00:08:10,657 --> 00:08:11,950 'cause I had hold of his ankles. 159 00:08:12,075 --> 00:08:13,451 I was towing him into shore. 160 00:08:13,576 --> 00:08:15,245 Hey! It's good to see ya! 161 00:08:15,370 --> 00:08:16,955 - 'Four minutes from broadcast.' - I'll be right back to get ya. 162 00:08:17,080 --> 00:08:18,415 'Four minutes.' 163 00:08:18,540 --> 00:08:21,459 Ooh! Hey. 164 00:08:21,584 --> 00:08:22,627 Hey. 165 00:08:22,752 --> 00:08:24,129 Wait a minute. Where's my bag? 166 00:08:24,254 --> 00:08:25,380 No, no. The bag's here. 167 00:08:25,505 --> 00:08:26,673 I brought it in. 168 00:08:26,798 --> 00:08:28,341 Mom, just look. 169 00:08:28,466 --> 00:08:30,010 Here it is. Come on, Yolanda. 170 00:08:30,135 --> 00:08:33,888 I swear to God I'm all, you know, verklempt. 171 00:08:36,182 --> 00:08:37,892 - Ohh. - It's so hot. 172 00:08:38,018 --> 00:08:41,021 Yeah. See? Plenty of time. 173 00:08:41,146 --> 00:08:43,023 So he gave you the job at WLT. 174 00:08:43,148 --> 00:08:45,108 - Well, his brother did. - 'Yeah, Art Soderberg.' 175 00:08:45,233 --> 00:08:46,401 'G.K. to the stage, please.' 176 00:08:46,526 --> 00:08:48,570 Art Soderberg gave you the job. 177 00:08:48,695 --> 00:08:51,156 'Yeah, it was a, it was the early morning show, right?' 178 00:08:51,281 --> 00:08:53,241 'Rise and shine show. Wilmer Scott, 5 a.m.' 179 00:08:53,366 --> 00:08:54,617 Me and Dusty used to have an early mornin' show. 180 00:08:54,743 --> 00:08:55,994 Is that right? Excuse me, partner. 181 00:08:56,119 --> 00:08:57,454 "Breakfast At The Bunkhouse." 182 00:08:57,579 --> 00:08:59,914 TV show. And, uh, it showed mostly 183 00:09:00,040 --> 00:09:01,583 cartoons and stuff. Remember that? 184 00:09:01,708 --> 00:09:03,293 For the kids. 185 00:09:03,418 --> 00:09:05,253 'Well, this was, uh, this came on' 186 00:09:05,378 --> 00:09:07,672 at 5:00 in the morning, and it was, uh, like a gospel show. 187 00:09:07,797 --> 00:09:09,215 - Inspirational show. - Inspirational show. 188 00:09:09,340 --> 00:09:11,009 Wilmer Scott was the host of it. 189 00:09:11,134 --> 00:09:13,595 'Wasn't Wilmer Scott the famous aviator?' 190 00:09:13,720 --> 00:09:15,847 - No. - Yeah. 191 00:09:15,972 --> 00:09:18,641 First man to fly the length of the Mississippi solo. 192 00:09:18,767 --> 00:09:20,560 - No. - I don't think so. 193 00:09:20,685 --> 00:09:22,270 That was his brother Wilbur Scott. 194 00:09:22,395 --> 00:09:24,105 'We're now at three minutes..' 195 00:09:24,230 --> 00:09:25,857 Flew from New Orleans to Memphis 196 00:09:25,982 --> 00:09:28,318 all the way up to Minnesota to Lake Itasca. 197 00:09:28,443 --> 00:09:30,862 And when he got up there, he tried to fire a signal rocket 198 00:09:30,987 --> 00:09:33,031 out the cockpit window but it was closed. 199 00:09:33,156 --> 00:09:35,366 He became the first civilian pilot to shoot himself down. 200 00:09:35,492 --> 00:09:36,701 - Ugh! - No. That was Wilbur. 201 00:09:36,826 --> 00:09:38,495 - You made that story up. - Right. 202 00:09:38,620 --> 00:09:40,080 'No, I'm talking about Wilmer Scott.' 203 00:09:40,205 --> 00:09:41,790 Crashed into the lake at his moment of triumph. 204 00:09:41,915 --> 00:09:43,458 - 'No.' - Wilmer. 205 00:09:43,583 --> 00:09:44,834 - 'Wilmer. He was the host..' - 'No. This was the--' 206 00:09:44,959 --> 00:09:47,253 - Right. - "The Rise And Shine Show." 207 00:09:47,378 --> 00:09:48,963 - "Rise And Shine." - 'Yeah.' 208 00:09:49,089 --> 00:09:51,216 Mr. Keillor, Al's on the verge of a coronary up there. 209 00:09:51,341 --> 00:09:52,801 Yeah. I'm there. 210 00:09:52,926 --> 00:09:56,012 Now, how did he have time to fly and do radio? 211 00:09:56,137 --> 00:09:57,514 You're thinking of Wilbur Scott, see? 212 00:09:57,639 --> 00:09:58,848 Yeah. It's not the same person. 213 00:09:58,973 --> 00:10:00,225 - Not the same person. - He was dead. 214 00:10:00,350 --> 00:10:02,102 You know, we used to have a dog in the act 215 00:10:02,227 --> 00:10:05,188 when Wanda and Connie were in it and that dog would sing-- 216 00:10:08,274 --> 00:10:10,652 We'd sing this old song and he would howl! 217 00:10:10,777 --> 00:10:12,153 Oh, my God, that was a dog. 218 00:10:12,278 --> 00:10:14,489 I been thinking about him all daylong. 219 00:10:14,614 --> 00:10:16,407 'Rusty always comes to my mind.' 220 00:10:16,533 --> 00:10:17,617 'Does it?' 221 00:10:17,742 --> 00:10:19,994 ♪ Go tell Aunt Gladys ♪ 222 00:10:20,120 --> 00:10:22,122 ♪ Go tell Aunt Gladys ♪ 223 00:10:22,247 --> 00:10:23,164 That's it! 224 00:10:23,289 --> 00:10:24,457 ♪ Go tell Aunt Gladys ♪ 225 00:10:24,582 --> 00:10:26,126 ♪ The old brown dog is dead ♪ 226 00:10:26,251 --> 00:10:28,253 ♪ An old brown dog named Rusty ♪ 227 00:10:28,378 --> 00:10:30,588 ♪ An old brown dog named Rusty ♪ 228 00:10:30,713 --> 00:10:32,757 ♪ An old brown dog named Rusty ♪ 229 00:10:32,882 --> 00:10:35,051 ♪ He just laid down and died ♪ 230 00:10:35,176 --> 00:10:36,386 - Ruff! Ruff! - Right on cue. 231 00:10:36,511 --> 00:10:37,720 It was, I mean.. Bow wow wow! 232 00:10:37,846 --> 00:10:39,430 - Ow, ow, ow! - Owww! 233 00:10:39,556 --> 00:10:40,765 - Oooowww! - How-ow! 234 00:10:40,890 --> 00:10:42,183 I don't know if we were harmonizing with him 235 00:10:42,308 --> 00:10:43,601 or he was harmonizing with us. 236 00:10:43,726 --> 00:10:46,855 ♪ Oh he died from chasin' squirrels ♪ 237 00:10:46,980 --> 00:10:48,231 'Ladies and gentlemen..' 238 00:10:48,356 --> 00:10:50,233 ♪ He died from chasin' squirrels ♪ 239 00:10:50,358 --> 00:10:52,694 ♪ He died from chasin' squirrels ♪ 240 00:10:52,819 --> 00:10:54,904 ♪ He ate one and got sick ♪ 241 00:10:55,029 --> 00:10:56,739 ♪ Must've been a bad one ♪ 242 00:10:56,865 --> 00:10:59,033 ♪ Must've been a bad one ♪ 243 00:10:59,159 --> 00:11:01,161 ♪ It must've been a bad one ♪ 244 00:11:01,286 --> 00:11:03,204 ♪ He just laid down and died ♪♪ 245 00:11:03,329 --> 00:11:05,790 Oh, my God! Oh, my God! 246 00:11:05,915 --> 00:11:07,792 - What? - Oh, God! This is it! 247 00:11:07,917 --> 00:11:10,044 Oh! I'm going into labor! 248 00:11:10,170 --> 00:11:11,379 - Oh! Uh-- - Oh, my gosh! 249 00:11:11,504 --> 00:11:13,131 I can feel it! My baby's coming out! 250 00:11:13,256 --> 00:11:16,801 'It's going to come out on this dirty make-up room floor!' 251 00:11:16,926 --> 00:11:18,887 Oh! Oh! Whoa! 252 00:11:19,012 --> 00:11:20,054 Just take it easy. 253 00:11:20,180 --> 00:11:21,848 Just kidding. 254 00:11:21,973 --> 00:11:23,725 - Ohh! - You-you phony! 255 00:11:23,850 --> 00:11:25,351 Get her up out of there. 256 00:11:25,476 --> 00:11:27,687 You were fakin'? I was callin' 911! 257 00:11:27,812 --> 00:11:29,189 I'm sorry. They just wouldn't pay attention. 258 00:11:29,314 --> 00:11:31,316 - I had to think of something. - I'm going to work. 259 00:11:31,441 --> 00:11:32,358 I didn't mean to scare you, Donna. 260 00:11:32,483 --> 00:11:33,818 Wilmer Scott. 261 00:11:33,943 --> 00:11:35,528 - Let's go. - Garrison! 262 00:11:35,653 --> 00:11:38,531 Wilmer Scott was the one who hypnotized the chickens.. 263 00:11:38,656 --> 00:11:40,074 'He did like, what, four of those chickens in a row.' 264 00:11:40,200 --> 00:11:41,242 'Four or five of them.' 265 00:11:41,367 --> 00:11:42,952 'Who was Wilmer Scott?' 266 00:11:43,077 --> 00:11:45,038 'He was the host of that "Rise And Shine Show." 267 00:11:45,163 --> 00:11:47,040 'Early in the morning, 5 a.m.' 268 00:11:47,165 --> 00:11:49,209 'That's, uh, what, uh, G.K. got started in radio.' 269 00:11:49,334 --> 00:11:50,668 Right. Gospel show. 270 00:11:50,793 --> 00:11:52,086 And he hypnotized chickens on the radio? 271 00:11:52,212 --> 00:11:53,338 No, but he did the chickens on this show. 272 00:11:53,463 --> 00:11:54,631 On this show? 273 00:11:54,756 --> 00:11:56,591 Not on that "Rise And Shine" show. 274 00:11:56,716 --> 00:11:58,009 'Alright, let's dim the house lights.' 275 00:11:58,134 --> 00:11:59,510 You remember when he did those chickens? 276 00:11:59,636 --> 00:12:01,554 - Hypnotized them? - Yep. 277 00:12:01,679 --> 00:12:03,598 - Chinese chickens, right? - Kung pao, I believe. 278 00:12:03,723 --> 00:12:05,725 With the little.. Didn't they have a little-- 279 00:12:05,850 --> 00:12:07,185 Here we go. Over here. 280 00:12:07,310 --> 00:12:09,646 - Piscacadawadaquoddymoggin. - Pisca what? 281 00:12:09,771 --> 00:12:12,023 The sponsor. 5 a.m. "Rise And Shine Show." 282 00:12:12,148 --> 00:12:13,107 What was it called? 283 00:12:13,233 --> 00:12:15,193 Made of buffalo grass, sassafras 284 00:12:15,318 --> 00:12:17,737 and natural grain alcohol. 285 00:12:17,862 --> 00:12:19,906 - What was it called? - Piscacadawadaquoddymoggin. 286 00:12:20,031 --> 00:12:21,241 No, it's piscacadawadaquoddymoggin. 287 00:12:21,366 --> 00:12:22,742 - 'Places, please.' - Okay. Places. 288 00:12:22,867 --> 00:12:23,785 - That's what I said. - Remember the jingle? 289 00:12:23,910 --> 00:12:25,578 How it went? 290 00:12:25,703 --> 00:12:30,124 ♪ Piscacadawadaquoddymoggin medicinal formula ♪♪ 291 00:12:30,250 --> 00:12:31,542 Standin' by. Here we go. 292 00:12:31,668 --> 00:12:33,169 It was what Wilmer Scott had in his coffee cup-- 293 00:12:33,294 --> 00:12:34,754 - Uh-huh. - Every morning. 294 00:12:34,879 --> 00:12:36,172 - 5 a.m. - Right here. 295 00:12:36,297 --> 00:12:38,216 - Then he quit drinking. - Uh-huh. Okay. 296 00:12:38,341 --> 00:12:39,634 And he lost interest in radio. 297 00:12:39,759 --> 00:12:40,885 Check your barn doors. 298 00:12:41,010 --> 00:12:42,220 He developed mic fright. 299 00:12:42,345 --> 00:12:43,471 How did he quit drinking? 300 00:12:43,596 --> 00:12:45,306 - He just quit. - And we're on. 301 00:12:45,431 --> 00:12:46,891 Then he raised chickens. 302 00:12:47,016 --> 00:12:49,394 Show chickens. Chinese chickens. 303 00:12:53,273 --> 00:12:56,025 ♪ I hear that old piano ♪ 304 00:12:56,150 --> 00:12:58,695 ♪ From down the avenue ♪ 305 00:13:02,073 --> 00:13:04,200 ♪ I smell the pine trees ♪ 306 00:13:04,325 --> 00:13:06,786 ♪ I look around for you ♪ 307 00:13:09,205 --> 00:13:14,335 ♪ Oh my sweet sweet sweet old someone ♪ 308 00:13:14,460 --> 00:13:17,922 ♪ Coming through that door ♪ 309 00:13:18,047 --> 00:13:21,592 ♪ It's Saturday and the band is playin' ♪ 310 00:13:21,718 --> 00:13:24,887 ♪ Honey could we ask for more? ♪ 311 00:13:25,013 --> 00:13:26,764 Hello, everybody, on a Saturday night 312 00:13:26,889 --> 00:13:28,599 and welcome to a live broadcast 313 00:13:28,725 --> 00:13:33,146 of "A Prairie Home Companion" coming to you from WLT 314 00:13:33,271 --> 00:13:35,023 your friendly neighbor station. 315 00:13:35,148 --> 00:13:36,774 Noir, where you been? 316 00:13:36,899 --> 00:13:38,776 I was looking after the Johnson girls. 317 00:13:38,901 --> 00:13:40,403 Okay. Aren't you supposed to be guarding the door? 318 00:13:40,528 --> 00:13:42,030 Are you worried about something? 319 00:13:42,155 --> 00:13:44,490 Uh, I had a weird call from some crazy lady, so-- 320 00:13:44,615 --> 00:13:47,368 - Oh, she's not that crazy. - How do you know? 321 00:13:47,493 --> 00:13:50,121 Because I met her earlier this afternoon. She came by. 322 00:13:50,246 --> 00:13:53,374 What does she look like? You get a description? 323 00:13:53,499 --> 00:13:54,834 Yeah, I got a description. 324 00:13:54,959 --> 00:13:57,295 - Yeah? - She was beautiful. 325 00:13:57,420 --> 00:13:59,797 Her hair was what God had in mind 326 00:13:59,922 --> 00:14:02,091 when He said, "Let there be--" 327 00:14:02,216 --> 00:14:03,885 Hair. Right. Hair. 328 00:14:04,010 --> 00:14:06,846 Hair. Yeah. 329 00:14:06,971 --> 00:14:08,473 She gave me a smile so sweet 330 00:14:08,598 --> 00:14:10,892 you could've poured it on your pancakes. 331 00:14:11,017 --> 00:14:13,561 She was wearin' a white trench coat, so white 332 00:14:13,686 --> 00:14:16,022 that rain would be embarrassed to fall on it. 333 00:14:16,147 --> 00:14:17,982 Got it. Right. 334 00:14:18,107 --> 00:14:19,734 The skirt she was wearing was so tight 335 00:14:19,859 --> 00:14:22,695 you could read the embroidery on her underwear. 336 00:14:22,820 --> 00:14:29,202 It said, "Wash in lukewarm water and spin lightly." 337 00:14:29,327 --> 00:14:31,120 Okay, you're making it up. 338 00:14:31,245 --> 00:14:33,623 She had a Mount Rushmore T-shirt on 339 00:14:33,748 --> 00:14:35,666 and those guys never looked so good. 340 00:14:35,792 --> 00:14:37,543 Especially Jefferson and Lincoln. 341 00:14:37,668 --> 00:14:41,798 - Right. - Kind of bloated but happy. 342 00:14:41,923 --> 00:14:44,050 - If you know what I mean. - Yeah. 343 00:14:44,175 --> 00:14:45,468 It was an honor just to sit there 344 00:14:45,593 --> 00:14:48,137 and inhale the same air that she had 345 00:14:48,262 --> 00:14:52,350 so recently exhaled, just to exchange 346 00:14:52,475 --> 00:14:55,311 the atmosphere between us, so to speak. 347 00:14:55,436 --> 00:14:57,647 'Look, what did she want? Did she say anything about--' 348 00:14:57,772 --> 00:15:00,483 - Who? - 'The lady.' 349 00:15:00,608 --> 00:15:03,611 Oh. She was looking for the Presbyterian Church. 350 00:15:03,736 --> 00:15:05,905 Like a dope, I told her where it was. 351 00:15:06,030 --> 00:15:08,658 And out of my life she went, just as.. 352 00:15:08,783 --> 00:15:11,327 ...quickly and erotically as she had entered it. 353 00:15:15,581 --> 00:15:17,166 Are you tired of your current herring? 354 00:15:19,085 --> 00:15:21,546 Has it lost that certain something that you expect 355 00:15:21,671 --> 00:15:22,964 in a pickled fish product? 356 00:15:25,091 --> 00:15:27,969 If so, maybe it's time you try Jens Jenson. 357 00:15:28,094 --> 00:15:30,263 It's the Lake Superior herring that's made 358 00:15:30,388 --> 00:15:33,099 the old-fashioned Norwegian way. 359 00:15:41,524 --> 00:15:45,820 C-can someone turn it down, please? 360 00:15:45,945 --> 00:15:47,029 Please? 361 00:15:48,948 --> 00:15:50,283 ♪ Oh Jens Jenson's ♪♪ 362 00:15:50,408 --> 00:15:52,034 Please? 363 00:15:52,160 --> 00:15:53,202 'And if your grocer doesn't stock it' 364 00:15:53,327 --> 00:15:54,912 'ask him why not.' 365 00:15:55,037 --> 00:15:56,414 You know what I'm gonna do? 366 00:15:56,539 --> 00:15:59,083 I'm gonna color my hair strawberry blond. 367 00:15:59,208 --> 00:16:00,626 Hey. 368 00:16:00,751 --> 00:16:02,962 I swear to God, I should've done it years ago. 369 00:16:03,087 --> 00:16:04,672 I should have broke loose, gone to Chicago 370 00:16:04,797 --> 00:16:06,382 when mama died back then. 371 00:16:06,507 --> 00:16:07,967 That's what I should have done. 372 00:16:08,092 --> 00:16:09,844 You know, you put those things off. 373 00:16:09,969 --> 00:16:12,680 You seldom get around to 'em again. 374 00:16:12,805 --> 00:16:14,849 Hmm. What are you writin'? 375 00:16:14,974 --> 00:16:16,058 Poem. 376 00:16:16,184 --> 00:16:17,560 Oh, a poem. 377 00:16:17,685 --> 00:16:19,979 What's it about? 378 00:16:20,104 --> 00:16:21,564 Suicide. 379 00:16:21,689 --> 00:16:26,402 - 'Oh, my God.' - Oh. Okay. 380 00:16:26,527 --> 00:16:28,738 'Well, you know what my philosophy is.' 381 00:16:28,863 --> 00:16:31,115 Yes, I do, so don't tell me. 382 00:16:31,240 --> 00:16:35,203 I.. I think that you gotta be grateful 383 00:16:35,328 --> 00:16:36,704 for everything that happens to you 384 00:16:36,829 --> 00:16:39,332 because that's what got you here, you know? 385 00:16:39,457 --> 00:16:40,666 And if you hadn't gone through 386 00:16:40,791 --> 00:16:42,418 all the things that you went through 387 00:16:42,543 --> 00:16:44,712 why, you know, you wouldn't have wound up 388 00:16:44,837 --> 00:16:48,674 where you are now, so, I don't know. 389 00:16:48,799 --> 00:16:49,926 Disappointment doesn't get you anywhere. 390 00:16:50,051 --> 00:16:52,595 Anywhere. Aren't you wonderful? 391 00:16:52,720 --> 00:16:55,932 Well, one door closes and another one opens 392 00:16:56,057 --> 00:17:00,520 then, you know, everything is a step along the way 393 00:17:00,645 --> 00:17:03,314 and it all leads to something else. 394 00:17:03,439 --> 00:17:06,025 Pardon me if I don't get down on my knees. 395 00:17:06,150 --> 00:17:09,320 Well, that's what I think. 396 00:17:09,445 --> 00:17:12,406 Ahem. Read me some of your poem. 397 00:17:12,532 --> 00:17:14,951 - It's not finished. - Huh? 398 00:17:15,076 --> 00:17:17,286 Okay. 399 00:17:17,411 --> 00:17:20,289 "Soliloquy For A Blue Guitar." 400 00:17:20,414 --> 00:17:21,666 "Death is easy 401 00:17:21,791 --> 00:17:24,293 "like jumping into the big, blue air 402 00:17:24,418 --> 00:17:26,295 "and waving hello to God. 403 00:17:26,420 --> 00:17:27,797 "God is love 404 00:17:27,922 --> 00:17:29,131 "but He doesn't necessarily drop everything 405 00:17:29,257 --> 00:17:31,300 "to catch you, does He? 406 00:17:31,425 --> 00:17:34,387 "So, when you hook the hose up to your tailpipe 407 00:17:34,512 --> 00:17:37,390 "don't expect to wake up and get toast for breakfast. 408 00:17:37,515 --> 00:17:40,226 The toast is you." 409 00:17:40,351 --> 00:17:42,019 Hey, what was the name of that song? 410 00:17:42,144 --> 00:17:43,521 Well, did you like it? 411 00:17:43,646 --> 00:17:46,232 I won't be loaning you my car any time soon. 412 00:17:46,357 --> 00:17:47,483 Hose to the tailpipe. 413 00:17:49,068 --> 00:17:50,319 Thank you so much, I want to come in here 414 00:17:50,444 --> 00:17:51,862 and sing a song for you 415 00:17:51,988 --> 00:17:54,699 called "Slow Days Of Summer." 416 00:17:56,784 --> 00:18:00,162 Send this out to all the friends 417 00:18:00,288 --> 00:18:02,373 in my little hometown 418 00:18:02,498 --> 00:18:04,250 up north of here 419 00:18:04,375 --> 00:18:05,626 up on the river. 420 00:18:07,420 --> 00:18:10,464 ♪ Slow days of summer ♪ 421 00:18:10,590 --> 00:18:13,217 ♪ In this old town ♪ 422 00:18:13,342 --> 00:18:16,304 ♪ Sun goes across the sky ♪ 423 00:18:16,429 --> 00:18:19,473 ♪ Sometimes a car goes by ♪ 424 00:18:19,599 --> 00:18:22,351 ♪ There's one right now ♪ 425 00:18:22,476 --> 00:18:25,438 ♪ Looks like a Chevy ♪ 426 00:18:25,563 --> 00:18:28,357 ♪ Your Chevy's blue ♪ 427 00:18:28,482 --> 00:18:31,360 ♪ This Chevy's white and brown ♪ 428 00:18:31,485 --> 00:18:34,405 ♪ It doesn't slow down ♪ 429 00:18:34,530 --> 00:18:37,366 ♪ This looks like new ♪ 430 00:18:37,491 --> 00:18:40,202 ♪ You said you'd be here ♪ 431 00:18:40,328 --> 00:18:43,497 ♪ Someday yourself ♪ 432 00:18:43,623 --> 00:18:46,292 ♪ Maybe by Saturday ♪ 433 00:18:46,417 --> 00:18:49,503 ♪ If you could get away ♪ 434 00:18:49,629 --> 00:18:51,589 ♪ You'll let me know ♪ 435 00:18:55,259 --> 00:18:58,304 - You came back. - I did. 436 00:18:58,429 --> 00:19:01,182 The Presbyterians weren't who you were lookin' for? 437 00:19:01,307 --> 00:19:04,769 No, Mr. Noir. I was sent here. 438 00:19:04,894 --> 00:19:07,229 What can I do for you? 439 00:19:07,355 --> 00:19:08,981 Really nothing. 440 00:19:09,106 --> 00:19:10,608 I'll take care of it. 441 00:19:12,360 --> 00:19:15,488 You have a nice show here, Mr. Noir. 442 00:19:15,613 --> 00:19:18,199 Thanks. We like it. 443 00:19:18,324 --> 00:19:22,036 Do you believe in the fullness of time and the spirit? 444 00:19:22,161 --> 00:19:24,955 Most people don't, you know. 445 00:19:25,081 --> 00:19:28,417 It would be good, Mr. Noir, if you would open your heart 446 00:19:28,542 --> 00:19:31,504 to the fullness of time and the spirit 447 00:19:31,629 --> 00:19:33,422 which upholds and sustains us all 448 00:19:33,547 --> 00:19:35,299 through this world. Amen. 449 00:19:38,094 --> 00:19:39,428 Whatever you say. 450 00:19:43,057 --> 00:19:44,100 Hmm. 451 00:19:52,983 --> 00:19:55,945 ♪ Waiting for love to come ♪ 452 00:19:56,070 --> 00:19:58,614 ♪ All is alive ♪ 453 00:19:58,739 --> 00:20:01,867 ♪ Birds sing with angel tongues ♪ 454 00:20:01,992 --> 00:20:04,995 ♪ Small stones like diamonds ♪ 455 00:20:05,121 --> 00:20:08,416 ♪ All down the drive ♪ 456 00:20:08,541 --> 00:20:14,130 ♪ Around the corner an old dog appears ♪ 457 00:20:14,255 --> 00:20:17,258 ♪ Sits in the summer sun ♪ 458 00:20:17,383 --> 00:20:20,344 ♪ Waiting for love to come ♪ 459 00:20:20,469 --> 00:20:23,389 ♪ Wish you were here ♪ 460 00:20:23,514 --> 00:20:26,475 ♪ Wish you were here ♪ 461 00:20:26,600 --> 00:20:29,353 ♪ Ooh ♪♪ 462 00:20:31,981 --> 00:20:33,065 Thank you, boys. 463 00:20:35,443 --> 00:20:38,028 And the next week, we're back doin' the county fair circuit 464 00:20:38,154 --> 00:20:40,156 changin' our petticoats in the ladies' toilet 465 00:20:40,281 --> 00:20:41,407 and the boys tryin' to peek in. 466 00:20:42,950 --> 00:20:44,577 That was the only good part about it. 467 00:20:44,702 --> 00:20:46,829 Then you have to go outdoors and sing in the open air 468 00:20:46,954 --> 00:20:49,123 with a cloud of mosquitoes around your head. 469 00:20:49,248 --> 00:20:50,458 - Yeah. - Remember that time.. 470 00:20:50,583 --> 00:20:52,793 Honestly, Lola, honest to God 471 00:20:52,918 --> 00:20:54,670 a dragonfly flew right in my mouth. 472 00:20:54,795 --> 00:20:57,381 - 'Oh, yeah!' - It was this big. 473 00:20:57,506 --> 00:20:59,717 - I thought it was a bird. - How old were you then? 474 00:20:59,842 --> 00:21:02,386 I was 13. Your mother was 10. 475 00:21:02,511 --> 00:21:07,433 - 'Wanda was what?' - Wanda was 16. Connie, 15. 476 00:21:07,558 --> 00:21:11,020 'Yep. That was the end of it. The end of the road.' 477 00:21:11,145 --> 00:21:13,355 - That was a great-- - 'Envy.' 478 00:21:13,481 --> 00:21:15,733 You know, Wanda took it real hard, didn't she? 479 00:21:15,858 --> 00:21:18,194 A week later, she got arrested. 480 00:21:18,319 --> 00:21:20,529 For what? You never told me this. 481 00:21:20,654 --> 00:21:22,907 Shoplifting, and I did tell you this. 482 00:21:23,032 --> 00:21:26,494 Mom, you're going senile. You didn't tell me that. 483 00:21:26,619 --> 00:21:28,245 'She was havin' a cup of coffee in the cafe.' 484 00:21:28,370 --> 00:21:29,830 'She ordered a glazed donut.' 485 00:21:29,955 --> 00:21:32,625 She started eatin' it and she got a sugar rush. 486 00:21:32,750 --> 00:21:35,044 She was diagnosed hypoglycemic. 487 00:21:35,169 --> 00:21:36,962 And so, she forgets she didn't pay for the donut 488 00:21:37,087 --> 00:21:38,589 and she walks out the door. 489 00:21:38,714 --> 00:21:41,050 It wasn't two minutes, the red lights are flashin' 490 00:21:41,175 --> 00:21:43,260 and she's in handcuffs 491 00:21:43,385 --> 00:21:45,679 and the cameras, the TV camera, the station came right down. 492 00:21:45,805 --> 00:21:47,181 It was on the news. 493 00:21:47,306 --> 00:21:48,891 And her hair is, like, stickin' out like this 494 00:21:49,016 --> 00:21:51,811 and she's bawlin' and daddy sees it on the 10 o'clock newscast. 495 00:21:51,936 --> 00:21:53,729 'Cause he was in the hospital with mama. 496 00:21:53,854 --> 00:21:56,315 She was havin' her tubes tied after Johnny was born. 497 00:21:56,440 --> 00:21:58,526 - Thank you. - Didn't need to know that. 498 00:21:58,651 --> 00:22:00,110 Well.. 499 00:22:00,236 --> 00:22:04,740 Daddy sees Wanda gettin' arrested on TV for shoplifting. 500 00:22:04,865 --> 00:22:06,909 He has a major coronary occlusion. 501 00:22:07,034 --> 00:22:10,538 'Yeah. He just climbed up into the hospital bed with mama' 502 00:22:10,663 --> 00:22:13,207 then he pulled the sheet up over his own face 503 00:22:13,332 --> 00:22:15,209 and when the nurse came in, he was dead. 504 00:22:15,334 --> 00:22:17,545 That was it. You know? 505 00:22:17,670 --> 00:22:20,130 'He left a note, 'cause Wanda got released from jail' 506 00:22:20,256 --> 00:22:23,259 just for the funeral. He said, "Wanda, you broke my heart. 507 00:22:23,384 --> 00:22:24,927 Signed, daddy." 508 00:22:25,052 --> 00:22:28,055 She did 30 days for one glazed donut. 509 00:22:28,180 --> 00:22:30,266 - 'A 59-cent donut.' - Think about that. 510 00:22:30,391 --> 00:22:31,851 If it had been rock and roll, she could have 511 00:22:31,976 --> 00:22:33,727 thrown sofas out of the window, hotel window. 512 00:22:33,853 --> 00:22:35,479 No, not even her own sofa. 513 00:22:35,604 --> 00:22:38,065 She could throw somebody else's sofa out the window. 514 00:22:38,190 --> 00:22:40,067 You don't know what kind of passersby at the bottom. 515 00:22:40,192 --> 00:22:42,194 She could've been hittin' people. Wouldn't have mattered. 516 00:22:42,319 --> 00:22:44,280 But when you're playin' to Christian family audiences 517 00:22:44,405 --> 00:22:45,948 like we were, you so much as forget to pay 518 00:22:46,073 --> 00:22:49,493 for a damn donut, they throw you out like a piece of garbage. 519 00:22:49,618 --> 00:22:52,288 Sooner kill you than look at you. 520 00:22:52,413 --> 00:22:54,540 Some of those good people, eh? 521 00:22:54,665 --> 00:22:58,043 The Soderberg family selling out! 522 00:22:58,168 --> 00:23:00,379 I just do not get it. 523 00:23:00,504 --> 00:23:02,089 I mean, they've owned WLT 524 00:23:02,214 --> 00:23:04,592 since they ran it out of a sandwich shop. 525 00:23:04,717 --> 00:23:06,552 I mean, that's what the call letters stand for, you know. 526 00:23:06,677 --> 00:23:08,804 "With lettuce and tomato." Did you know that? 527 00:23:08,929 --> 00:23:09,847 I mean, how do you just walk away 528 00:23:09,972 --> 00:23:11,140 from somethin' like that? 529 00:23:11,265 --> 00:23:12,933 I mean, what are we? Used Kleenex? 530 00:23:13,058 --> 00:23:15,019 They got old, babe. 531 00:23:15,144 --> 00:23:18,314 They started thinking about ease and comfort. 532 00:23:18,439 --> 00:23:20,816 Then, I figure, they saw a brochure 533 00:23:20,941 --> 00:23:23,485 about an island with palm trees 534 00:23:23,611 --> 00:23:26,155 and an azure sky 535 00:23:26,280 --> 00:23:28,240 and miles of sand, and they thought 536 00:23:28,365 --> 00:23:30,993 "Hey! Ha ha, we don't have to suffer through 537 00:23:31,118 --> 00:23:34,371 "these miserable Minnesota winters. 538 00:23:34,496 --> 00:23:36,457 "We don't have to freeze our butts off 539 00:23:36,582 --> 00:23:37,875 "waiting for our bus to come. 540 00:23:38,000 --> 00:23:39,835 "Our bus has come. It's here. 541 00:23:39,960 --> 00:23:42,671 "We'll leave the business to the kids 542 00:23:42,796 --> 00:23:45,424 and we'll head for paradise and to hell with it." 543 00:23:45,549 --> 00:23:48,510 Only trouble is, the kids had already gone down to paradise 544 00:23:48,636 --> 00:23:49,970 ahead of them. 545 00:23:50,095 --> 00:23:52,514 'So then, a big corporation down in Texas' 546 00:23:52,640 --> 00:23:56,310 offered them a gazillion dollars for it. 547 00:23:56,435 --> 00:23:57,519 Texans. 548 00:23:57,645 --> 00:23:59,188 Sure. 549 00:23:59,313 --> 00:24:01,023 They talk funny and their eyes don't focus 550 00:24:01,148 --> 00:24:04,068 and their flesh is rotting and falling off 551 00:24:04,193 --> 00:24:08,322 'but hey, you know, so what?' 552 00:24:08,447 --> 00:24:11,700 Yeah, nobody's perfect and, uh.. 553 00:24:11,825 --> 00:24:14,453 ...money is money, so, the Soderbergs took the dough. 554 00:24:14,578 --> 00:24:17,289 End of story. Do you have any tweezers? 555 00:24:17,414 --> 00:24:20,334 Egg salad or ham salad? 556 00:24:20,459 --> 00:24:24,672 - Why are you crying? - Well, it's the last show. 557 00:24:24,797 --> 00:24:28,217 I'm never going to see these people again. 558 00:24:28,342 --> 00:24:29,551 You'll see them again. 559 00:24:29,677 --> 00:24:32,471 I knew all of them from the old days. 560 00:24:32,596 --> 00:24:35,391 Soupy and Red.. 561 00:24:35,516 --> 00:24:39,311 Ray and Helen. 562 00:24:39,436 --> 00:24:41,647 Gone and forgotten. 563 00:24:41,772 --> 00:24:44,066 Every sparrow is remembered. 564 00:24:46,735 --> 00:24:50,114 I don't even know if they're gonna make a speech or anything. 565 00:24:50,239 --> 00:24:52,533 It doesn't seem right, does it? 566 00:24:52,658 --> 00:24:53,784 No. 567 00:24:53,909 --> 00:24:57,830 Some big company come in and steps on us 568 00:24:57,955 --> 00:25:00,332 like we were bugs at the picnic. 569 00:25:04,795 --> 00:25:07,715 What's in ham salad? 570 00:25:07,840 --> 00:25:11,051 I-I can't remember the word. It was.. 571 00:25:12,761 --> 00:25:15,097 May I.. 572 00:25:15,222 --> 00:25:16,974 Maybe.. 573 00:25:17,099 --> 00:25:19,977 - 'Mayo?' - 'Mayonnaise.' 574 00:25:21,645 --> 00:25:23,272 'Mayonnaise.' 575 00:25:23,397 --> 00:25:27,609 Well, it's an end of an era when this show goes, guys. 576 00:25:27,735 --> 00:25:29,737 There won't be anything left on the radio except what? 577 00:25:29,862 --> 00:25:32,531 People yellin' at you and computers playin' music. 578 00:25:32,656 --> 00:25:33,824 I mean, it's a tragedy. 579 00:25:33,949 --> 00:25:35,367 I wasn't gonna tell you this 580 00:25:35,492 --> 00:25:37,369 but between you and me and the fly on the wall 581 00:25:37,494 --> 00:25:39,121 'there's a woman on the premises' 582 00:25:39,246 --> 00:25:41,248 'who I think, maybe, is gonna save our bacon.' 583 00:25:41,373 --> 00:25:43,459 - Hmm? - She's got that look about her. 584 00:25:43,584 --> 00:25:45,419 - Who is she? - I'm not sure. 585 00:25:45,544 --> 00:25:47,629 I'm still working on figuring that one out. 586 00:25:47,755 --> 00:25:49,548 Just close your eyes for a second. 587 00:25:49,673 --> 00:25:51,425 She from Norcomm? 588 00:25:51,550 --> 00:25:52,718 Time will tell. 589 00:25:52,843 --> 00:25:54,178 I'll just let personal charm 590 00:25:54,303 --> 00:25:55,846 and dashing good looks 591 00:25:55,971 --> 00:25:57,723 do their work. 592 00:25:57,848 --> 00:26:00,059 She walked in, couldn't take her eyes off me. 593 00:26:00,184 --> 00:26:02,811 Drawn to me like a moth to the flame. 594 00:26:02,936 --> 00:26:04,938 Every time there's a triumph in the world 595 00:26:05,064 --> 00:26:07,649 a million souls have to be trampled on 596 00:26:07,775 --> 00:26:10,652 and right there, you can see it right in the damn carpet. 597 00:26:10,778 --> 00:26:12,988 'What does that have to do with anything?' 598 00:26:13,113 --> 00:26:16,158 - Mama. She.. She went-- - 'She went up to--' 599 00:26:16,283 --> 00:26:18,327 It was a lot for mama to put up with. 600 00:26:18,452 --> 00:26:20,704 We had to shovel her into the Good Shepherd Home. 601 00:26:20,829 --> 00:26:22,539 That's it. That was the sad day. 602 00:26:22,664 --> 00:26:24,083 Connie quit the act. 603 00:26:24,208 --> 00:26:25,709 God, we'd already lost Wanda. 604 00:26:25,834 --> 00:26:27,086 Wanda was like magic. 605 00:26:27,211 --> 00:26:28,921 The four of us, when we were together 606 00:26:29,046 --> 00:26:30,297 she was singin'. 607 00:26:30,422 --> 00:26:32,174 And next to you, I'm tellin' you 608 00:26:32,299 --> 00:26:33,509 you've followed in her footsteps. 609 00:26:33,634 --> 00:26:35,552 You are the same, the same talent. 610 00:26:35,677 --> 00:26:37,012 No. I don't know about that. 611 00:26:37,137 --> 00:26:38,514 So, now, it's just the two of us. 612 00:26:38,639 --> 00:26:40,766 - 'Yep. Just the two of us.' - You know what? 613 00:26:40,891 --> 00:26:43,352 It was your dad got us on the radio. 614 00:26:43,477 --> 00:26:45,896 God, that was a good-lookin' family! 615 00:26:46,021 --> 00:26:47,898 I can understand you goin' for that guy. 616 00:26:48,023 --> 00:26:49,900 Yeah, he sang like an angel. 617 00:26:50,025 --> 00:26:52,611 He sang.. 618 00:26:52,736 --> 00:26:57,032 ♪ Softly and tenderly ♪ 619 00:26:57,157 --> 00:27:00,702 ♪ Jesus is calling ♪ 620 00:27:00,828 --> 00:27:07,668 ♪ Callin' for you and for me ♪ 621 00:27:07,793 --> 00:27:10,337 ♪ See on the portal ♪ 622 00:27:10,462 --> 00:27:14,091 ♪ He's waiting and watching ♪ 623 00:27:14,216 --> 00:27:20,264 ♪ Watching for you and for me ♪ 624 00:27:20,389 --> 00:27:22,933 ♪ Come home ♪ 625 00:27:23,058 --> 00:27:26,687 ♪ Come home ♪ 626 00:27:26,812 --> 00:27:32,359 ♪ Ye who are weary come home ♪ 627 00:27:34,361 --> 00:27:37,573 ♪ Hmm-mmm ♪♪ 628 00:27:37,698 --> 00:27:40,909 Singing is the only thing that puts me right. 629 00:27:45,247 --> 00:27:47,249 ♪ Well Charlie you're a good ol' boy ♪ 630 00:27:47,374 --> 00:27:49,042 ♪ Charlie you're alright ♪ 631 00:27:49,168 --> 00:27:50,669 ♪ Charlie open up the store ♪ 632 00:27:50,794 --> 00:27:52,546 ♪ We're comin' down tonight ♪ 633 00:27:52,671 --> 00:27:54,256 ♪ Out where you can see the stars ♪ 634 00:27:54,381 --> 00:27:55,757 ♪ And the livin's slow ♪ 635 00:27:55,883 --> 00:27:57,801 ♪ We'll eat potluck and pool guitars ♪ 636 00:27:57,926 --> 00:27:59,553 ♪ Down on old plank road ♪ 637 00:27:59,678 --> 00:28:01,263 ♪ Ohh ♪ 638 00:28:01,388 --> 00:28:02,806 ♪ Down on old plank road ♪ 639 00:28:02,931 --> 00:28:04,808 ♪ We'll eat potluck and pool guitars ♪ 640 00:28:04,933 --> 00:28:06,935 ♪ Down on old plank road ♪♪ 641 00:28:07,060 --> 00:28:12,399 ♪ Come home ♪ ♪ Come home ♪ 642 00:28:12,524 --> 00:28:19,323 ♪ Ye who are weary come home ♪♪ 643 00:28:19,448 --> 00:28:21,909 - Hold it. Are we on? - Uh, not yet. 644 00:28:22,034 --> 00:28:23,410 - You've got a few minutes. - What are we doin'? 645 00:28:23,535 --> 00:28:24,870 'You're on in the powder milk segment' 646 00:28:24,995 --> 00:28:27,289 doing "Gold Watch And Chain" with him. 647 00:28:27,414 --> 00:28:29,958 We haven't done that for years. 648 00:28:30,083 --> 00:28:34,421 ♪ I'll pawn you my gold watch and chain love ♪ 649 00:28:34,546 --> 00:28:38,008 ♪ I'll pawn you my gold wedding ring.. ♪♪ 650 00:28:38,133 --> 00:28:40,052 Excuse me, I gotta get a head start 651 00:28:40,177 --> 00:28:41,637 on gettin' pie-eyed tonight. 652 00:28:41,762 --> 00:28:44,640 ♪ This heart in my bosom ♪ 653 00:28:44,765 --> 00:28:49,811 ♪ Only say that you'll love me again ♪♪ 654 00:28:49,937 --> 00:28:51,313 How about "Red River Valley?" 655 00:28:51,438 --> 00:28:54,107 'Fine. Whatever you'd like.' 656 00:28:54,233 --> 00:28:57,110 I would just like there to be 657 00:28:57,236 --> 00:28:59,738 a spot for Lola on the show later. 658 00:28:59,863 --> 00:29:03,158 I hope so. If there's time. 659 00:29:03,283 --> 00:29:04,368 Well, this isn't really gonna be 660 00:29:04,493 --> 00:29:06,161 your last show, is it? 661 00:29:06,286 --> 00:29:08,163 Every show's your last show. 662 00:29:08,288 --> 00:29:10,165 That's my philosophy. 663 00:29:10,290 --> 00:29:13,752 Thank you, Plato. Kierkegaard. 664 00:29:15,128 --> 00:29:16,546 'Button up, would ya?' 665 00:29:16,672 --> 00:29:19,091 I am. That's as far as it goes. 666 00:29:22,719 --> 00:29:24,429 ♪ Well sister and her oldest girl ♪ 667 00:29:24,554 --> 00:29:26,348 ♪ They sing so good together ♪ 668 00:29:26,473 --> 00:29:27,891 ♪ Jason he can make me laugh ♪ 669 00:29:28,016 --> 00:29:29,851 ♪ And he just keeps gettin' better ♪ 670 00:29:29,977 --> 00:29:31,687 ♪ Claire has got a sweet new one ♪ 671 00:29:31,812 --> 00:29:33,146 ♪ About her Timmy-o ♪ 672 00:29:33,272 --> 00:29:35,190 ♪ And John is everybody's man ♪ 673 00:29:35,315 --> 00:29:36,900 ♪ Down on Old Plank Road ♪ 674 00:29:37,025 --> 00:29:38,819 ♪ Ohh ♪ 675 00:29:38,944 --> 00:29:40,195 ♪ Down on Old Plank Road ♪♪ 676 00:29:40,320 --> 00:29:42,823 Hey, uh, can you tell potato face here 677 00:29:42,948 --> 00:29:46,326 that his butt is too big for his pants 678 00:29:46,451 --> 00:29:48,412 and people can see his crack 679 00:29:48,537 --> 00:29:50,038 and it ain't nothin' any normal person 680 00:29:50,163 --> 00:29:51,415 would ever care to look at? 681 00:29:51,540 --> 00:29:52,833 Where? 682 00:29:52,958 --> 00:29:55,002 In the back. That's where your crack is. 683 00:29:55,127 --> 00:29:56,295 Well, I don't see nothin'. 684 00:29:56,420 --> 00:29:58,714 - Hey, Molly. - Don't talk to me. 685 00:29:58,839 --> 00:30:00,048 Am I decent back there? 686 00:30:00,173 --> 00:30:02,426 Don't ask me. I'm not your mother. 687 00:30:02,551 --> 00:30:03,719 You might be decent 688 00:30:03,844 --> 00:30:05,470 if you lost 25 pounds of ugly fat. 689 00:30:05,595 --> 00:30:08,390 And I might suggest cuttin' off your head. 690 00:30:08,515 --> 00:30:10,726 She showed me her tattoo once. 691 00:30:10,851 --> 00:30:12,185 Hell she did. 692 00:30:12,311 --> 00:30:14,021 On her shoulder. 693 00:30:14,146 --> 00:30:15,272 You're lyin' through your teeth. 694 00:30:15,397 --> 00:30:16,898 Left shoulder. Right here. 695 00:30:17,024 --> 00:30:18,442 - That ain't the shoulder. - Whatever you want to call it. 696 00:30:18,567 --> 00:30:19,985 I'd call it the clavicle. 697 00:30:20,110 --> 00:30:21,278 Okay, well, why don't you ask her about it? 698 00:30:21,403 --> 00:30:22,404 Maybe she'll let you have a look. 699 00:30:22,529 --> 00:30:24,072 Well, what did it say? 700 00:30:24,197 --> 00:30:25,365 It said, "Freedom." 701 00:30:25,490 --> 00:30:27,409 Fr.. Now I know you're lyin'. 702 00:30:27,534 --> 00:30:29,870 Lola, give me those CDs. 703 00:30:29,995 --> 00:30:32,664 Come on, babe. 704 00:30:32,789 --> 00:30:34,750 Hey. Molly. 705 00:30:34,875 --> 00:30:36,710 Molly, here. Take these out front. 706 00:30:36,835 --> 00:30:38,754 Did you hear about the Soderbergs 707 00:30:38,879 --> 00:30:40,589 sellin' the radio station? 708 00:30:40,714 --> 00:30:42,758 I heard all about it. 709 00:30:42,883 --> 00:30:44,259 Are you okay? 710 00:30:44,384 --> 00:30:47,387 Yes, of course. Hmm? 711 00:30:47,512 --> 00:30:49,348 Kind of a bizarre feeling, isn't it? 712 00:30:49,473 --> 00:30:51,683 - What? - The silence. 713 00:30:51,808 --> 00:30:53,602 What? 714 00:30:53,727 --> 00:30:55,729 Well.. 715 00:30:55,854 --> 00:30:57,272 ...you're gonna say somethin' about it. 716 00:30:57,397 --> 00:30:58,774 You're gonna talk to the people, aren't you? 717 00:30:58,899 --> 00:31:01,610 Say, "Thanks for listening," or something. 718 00:31:01,735 --> 00:31:03,153 - Yeah, you know. - I don't think so. 719 00:31:03,278 --> 00:31:05,113 Why not? Say, "Thank you." 720 00:31:05,238 --> 00:31:06,865 What? 721 00:31:06,990 --> 00:31:09,284 I'm just not into making big speeches. 722 00:31:09,409 --> 00:31:10,619 What do you do when you leave somebody's house? 723 00:31:10,744 --> 00:31:12,245 You don't just turn around-- 724 00:31:12,371 --> 00:31:14,456 I don't make a big speech. A big weeping speech. 725 00:31:14,581 --> 00:31:18,251 Oh, that's it! You're afraid that you're gonna cry! 726 00:31:18,377 --> 00:31:19,795 I wouldn't. 727 00:31:19,920 --> 00:31:22,798 Yeah, that's right. That's true. You wouldn't. 728 00:31:22,923 --> 00:31:24,800 And you know, that's why, I think 729 00:31:24,925 --> 00:31:26,802 that our romance was so short. 730 00:31:26,927 --> 00:31:28,720 Because I knew that when we broke up 731 00:31:28,845 --> 00:31:32,099 you would not cry, so, I got way over it. 732 00:31:33,767 --> 00:31:34,851 Does that make sense to you? 733 00:31:34,976 --> 00:31:36,061 No, not at all. 734 00:31:36,186 --> 00:31:38,355 Bebopareebop frozen rhubarb pie 735 00:31:38,480 --> 00:31:40,190 and frozen rhubarb pie filling. 736 00:31:40,315 --> 00:31:41,316 Wouldn't this be a good time 737 00:31:41,441 --> 00:31:44,361 for a piece of rhubarb pie? 738 00:31:44,486 --> 00:31:46,947 ♪ Yes one little thing can revive a guy ♪ 739 00:31:47,072 --> 00:31:49,324 ♪ And that is a piece of rhubarb pie ♪ 740 00:31:49,449 --> 00:31:51,827 ♪ Serve it up nice and hot ♪ 741 00:31:51,952 --> 00:31:54,162 ♪ Maybe things aren't as bad as you thought ♪ 742 00:31:54,287 --> 00:31:56,540 ♪ Mama's little baby loves rhubarb rhubarb ♪ 743 00:31:56,665 --> 00:31:58,792 ♪ Bebopareebop rhubarb pie ♪ 744 00:31:58,917 --> 00:32:01,169 ♪ Mama's little baby loves rhubarb rhubarb ♪ 745 00:32:01,294 --> 00:32:03,505 ♪ Bebopareebop rhubarb pie ♪ 746 00:32:03,630 --> 00:32:05,507 ♪ Bebopareebop rhubarb pie ♪♪ 747 00:32:05,632 --> 00:32:08,009 Yes, bebopareebop rhubarb pie. 748 00:32:08,135 --> 00:32:09,719 And now, for bebopareebop 749 00:32:09,845 --> 00:32:12,722 please welcome one of radio's great singing families 750 00:32:12,848 --> 00:32:16,351 the Johnson girls, Rhonda and Yolanda. 751 00:32:16,476 --> 00:32:18,687 - Hi, everybody. - Hi. 752 00:32:18,812 --> 00:32:21,982 Oh, thank you. Thank you! Thank you very much. 753 00:32:22,107 --> 00:32:23,525 I just want to say right away 754 00:32:23,650 --> 00:32:28,822 how happy I am that my daughter Lola is here tonight. 755 00:32:28,947 --> 00:32:30,574 - Oh! Thank you, sweetheart. - Come on, Lola. 756 00:32:30,699 --> 00:32:32,325 'They want to see you.' 757 00:32:32,451 --> 00:32:34,035 'It means a lot to me that you came.' 758 00:32:34,161 --> 00:32:36,121 'Yeah, I named my little girl Lola' 759 00:32:36,246 --> 00:32:37,456 after our own mother. 760 00:32:37,581 --> 00:32:39,833 - Yeah, Lola was our mom. - Lola. 761 00:32:39,958 --> 00:32:42,002 And, uh.. 762 00:32:42,127 --> 00:32:43,462 ...tonight, we're gonna sing 763 00:32:43,587 --> 00:32:46,715 uh, an old song that our mother loved. 764 00:32:46,840 --> 00:32:48,049 Oh, it's one of her favorites. 765 00:32:48,175 --> 00:32:51,094 Yep. She's our inspiration. 766 00:32:51,219 --> 00:32:55,348 Some of you know this story, but, uh, she's the main reason 767 00:32:55,474 --> 00:32:57,642 that we started makin' music originally 768 00:32:57,767 --> 00:33:01,521 because you know she.. 769 00:33:01,646 --> 00:33:04,191 It was the only way we knew to make her happy. 770 00:33:04,316 --> 00:33:06,401 'She'd be down on the kitchen floor' 771 00:33:06,526 --> 00:33:07,903 'scrubbin' on her knees.' 772 00:33:08,028 --> 00:33:09,279 'But if you stood in the doorway' 773 00:33:09,404 --> 00:33:11,239 'and you sang a song that she liked' 774 00:33:11,364 --> 00:33:14,284 why, she would just look up and smile. 775 00:33:14,409 --> 00:33:17,078 Worn out as she was 776 00:33:17,204 --> 00:33:20,916 it was a smile as wide as the Mississippi. 777 00:33:23,210 --> 00:33:24,211 Down at the mouth. 778 00:33:24,336 --> 00:33:25,420 Not so slow, you sons of bitches. 779 00:33:25,545 --> 00:33:26,796 I'll break your necks. 780 00:33:26,922 --> 00:33:29,674 And you could see her gold tooth. 781 00:33:32,052 --> 00:33:37,599 ♪ Way down upon that old Mississippi River ♪ 782 00:33:37,724 --> 00:33:42,771 ♪ Not so far away ♪ 783 00:33:42,896 --> 00:33:48,151 ♪ That's where my folks have lived forever ♪ 784 00:33:48,276 --> 00:33:53,740 ♪ And that's where I'm going to stay ♪ 785 00:33:53,865 --> 00:33:59,788 ♪ I've been searchin' across the whole creation ♪ 786 00:33:59,913 --> 00:34:02,958 ♪ Half my life or more ♪ 787 00:34:03,083 --> 00:34:05,293 ♪ And more ♪ 788 00:34:05,418 --> 00:34:10,423 ♪ But I found my own sweet satisfaction ♪ 789 00:34:10,549 --> 00:34:15,804 ♪ Right here on that muddy river shore ♪ 790 00:34:15,929 --> 00:34:20,850 ♪ All the world is so sad and dreary ♪ 791 00:34:20,976 --> 00:34:26,982 ♪ Everywhere I roam ♪ 792 00:34:27,107 --> 00:34:28,733 ♪ Oh ♪ ♪ Oh mama ♪ 793 00:34:28,858 --> 00:34:32,487 ♪ Mama how I miss the Prairie ♪ 794 00:34:32,612 --> 00:34:38,493 ♪ And my Minnesota home ♪ 795 00:34:38,618 --> 00:34:41,788 I can see my mama's sweet, sweet face 796 00:34:41,913 --> 00:34:44,040 every Sunday morning. 797 00:34:44,165 --> 00:34:48,712 All the good old hymns, praise God that we've sung. 798 00:34:48,837 --> 00:34:50,714 We knelt in prayer right beside 799 00:34:50,839 --> 00:34:54,092 our precious aunts and uncles.. 800 00:34:54,217 --> 00:35:00,098 ♪ Who loved us when we were young ♪ 801 00:35:00,223 --> 00:35:02,434 ♪ In the valley of darkness ♪ 802 00:35:02,559 --> 00:35:05,312 ♪ They are the shepherds ♪ 803 00:35:05,437 --> 00:35:10,859 ♪ Who lead me to pastures green ♪ 804 00:35:10,984 --> 00:35:13,278 ♪ And I'll sit with my mama ♪ 805 00:35:13,403 --> 00:35:16,448 ♪ By the still still waters ♪ 806 00:35:16,573 --> 00:35:22,329 ♪ And goodness and mercy follow me ♪ 807 00:35:22,454 --> 00:35:24,623 ♪ I floated down ♪ 808 00:35:24,748 --> 00:35:27,500 ♪ The Columbia and the Hudson ♪ 809 00:35:27,626 --> 00:35:32,964 ♪ Walked on the banks of the Ohio ♪ 810 00:35:33,089 --> 00:35:35,300 ♪ On the banks of the Wabash ♪ 811 00:35:35,425 --> 00:35:38,011 ♪ And the mighty Colorado ♪ 812 00:35:38,136 --> 00:35:43,767 ♪ And the old red river way up north ♪ 813 00:35:43,892 --> 00:35:45,393 ♪ All the world ♪ 814 00:35:45,518 --> 00:35:49,898 ♪ It is a world of rivers ♪ 815 00:35:50,023 --> 00:35:55,070 ♪ Flowing to the sea yeah ♪ 816 00:35:55,195 --> 00:35:59,532 ♪ But here on that old Mississippi ♪ 817 00:35:59,658 --> 00:36:03,912 ♪ Here is the home for you and me ♪ 818 00:36:04,037 --> 00:36:05,664 Come on, bring it home! 819 00:36:05,789 --> 00:36:07,582 ♪ All the world ♪ 820 00:36:07,707 --> 00:36:10,919 ♪ It is so sad and dreary ♪ 821 00:36:11,044 --> 00:36:15,256 ♪ Everywhere I roam ♪ 822 00:36:15,382 --> 00:36:16,549 ♪ Oh oh oh ♪ 823 00:36:16,675 --> 00:36:18,718 ♪ Oh mama ♪ 824 00:36:18,843 --> 00:36:23,056 ♪ Howl missed the Prairie ♪ 825 00:36:23,181 --> 00:36:24,432 ♪ E-E-E ♪ 826 00:36:27,227 --> 00:36:32,232 ♪ And my Minnesota ♪ 827 00:36:32,357 --> 00:36:38,613 ♪ Home ♪♪ 828 00:36:46,788 --> 00:36:48,498 'The Johnson girls, thank you.' 829 00:36:48,623 --> 00:36:51,501 'Brought to you by powder milk biscuits in the big blue box' 830 00:36:51,626 --> 00:36:52,919 'with the picture of the biscuit on the cover.' 831 00:36:53,044 --> 00:36:55,463 'Heavens, they're tasty. And expeditious.' 832 00:36:55,588 --> 00:36:58,341 'Also brought to you by Mel's big boy buffet.' 833 00:36:58,466 --> 00:37:00,593 'Why pay more for fancy food' 834 00:37:00,719 --> 00:37:03,805 'when what you really want is meatloaf, squash' 835 00:37:03,930 --> 00:37:06,307 and mashed potatoes, and bread pudding 836 00:37:06,433 --> 00:37:10,311 all at Mel's big boy buffet for just 4.99. 837 00:37:10,437 --> 00:37:14,149 Yes, you heard me right. $4.99 cents. 838 00:37:14,274 --> 00:37:16,192 'Let's bring out Mr. Chuck Akers here' 839 00:37:16,317 --> 00:37:19,446 'Mr. Chuck Akers, come out here and give us a song.' 840 00:37:19,571 --> 00:37:22,073 'The sweet singer of Kandiyohi County' 841 00:37:22,198 --> 00:37:24,659 'the heartthrob of mature women everywhere.' 842 00:37:24,784 --> 00:37:27,078 My good friend, Mr. Chuck Akers. 843 00:37:27,203 --> 00:37:29,080 - Good to see you, sir. - Thank you, sir. 844 00:37:29,205 --> 00:37:32,792 Uh, we would like to bring a song to all of our fans. 845 00:37:32,917 --> 00:37:35,754 Now, that's kind of tough to do 'cause we're all over the place. 846 00:37:35,879 --> 00:37:37,672 Take me. Yeah, I've bounced all over. 847 00:37:37,797 --> 00:37:42,844 I've done tent shows, schoolhouses, uh, parkin' lots 848 00:37:42,969 --> 00:37:46,765 the back of trucks, movie theaters, auditoriums. 849 00:37:46,890 --> 00:37:50,018 I've even done churches. Now, that's hard to believe, I know. 850 00:37:50,143 --> 00:37:52,312 Anyway, this song is for you. 851 00:37:52,437 --> 00:37:55,523 And we mean every word of it, alright? 852 00:37:55,648 --> 00:37:56,816 Sic 'em. 853 00:37:58,610 --> 00:38:00,862 ♪ Hmm do do do do ♪ 854 00:38:00,987 --> 00:38:03,072 ♪ My bark of life ♪ 855 00:38:03,198 --> 00:38:05,200 ♪ Was tossin' down ♪ 856 00:38:05,325 --> 00:38:09,370 ♪ The troubled stream of time ♪ 857 00:38:09,496 --> 00:38:11,706 ♪ When first I saw ♪ 858 00:38:11,831 --> 00:38:13,792 ♪ Your smilin' face ♪ 859 00:38:13,917 --> 00:38:17,796 ♪ And youth was in its prime ♪ 860 00:38:17,921 --> 00:38:20,381 ♪ Oh I'll ne'er forget ♪ 861 00:38:20,507 --> 00:38:22,383 ♪ Where'er I roam ♪ 862 00:38:22,509 --> 00:38:26,679 ♪ Wherever you may be ♪ 863 00:38:26,805 --> 00:38:31,017 ♪ If ever I have had a friend ♪ 864 00:38:31,142 --> 00:38:34,229 ♪ You've been that friend to me ♪ 865 00:38:34,354 --> 00:38:35,563 - Hey, Lola. 866 00:38:35,688 --> 00:38:36,898 Heard you gonna sing a song for us 867 00:38:37,023 --> 00:38:37,941 lookin' forward to that. 868 00:38:38,066 --> 00:38:40,026 Oh, no. I don't, maybe. 869 00:38:40,151 --> 00:38:41,653 Well, it sure would mean the world to your mom. 870 00:38:41,778 --> 00:38:43,988 She always said you had talent. 871 00:38:44,113 --> 00:38:45,782 Yeah, I don't-I don't really know any of their songs. 872 00:38:45,907 --> 00:38:49,661 - I only know my own songs. - Well, sing one of them then. 873 00:38:49,786 --> 00:38:52,664 - They're mostly about death. - Oh. 874 00:38:52,789 --> 00:38:56,084 Well, lotta good songs about death. 875 00:38:56,209 --> 00:38:57,585 All mine are about suicide. 876 00:38:57,710 --> 00:38:59,921 Oh. 877 00:39:00,046 --> 00:39:03,466 Yeah, you know, um, hangin' yourself with an extension cord 878 00:39:03,591 --> 00:39:04,634 carbon monoxide.. 879 00:39:04,759 --> 00:39:06,427 - Hey, ahem.. - Overdose. 880 00:39:06,553 --> 00:39:09,973 You know, we could do, uh, "Amazing Grace" together. 881 00:39:10,098 --> 00:39:12,767 - I know "Amazing Grace." - Yeah? Well, hey, look. 882 00:39:12,892 --> 00:39:14,644 I'll play the guitar, we'll sing it together 883 00:39:14,769 --> 00:39:15,895 we'll bring this house down. 884 00:39:16,020 --> 00:39:17,021 You know, I don't know if you knew this 885 00:39:17,146 --> 00:39:18,815 about my friend Dusty here.. 886 00:39:18,940 --> 00:39:21,150 But he learned to sing gospel music in San Quentin. 887 00:39:21,276 --> 00:39:22,318 And full shush. 888 00:39:22,443 --> 00:39:23,736 Yes sir, that's where I met him. 889 00:39:23,862 --> 00:39:25,071 I was with Johnny Cash, singin' in prisons. 890 00:39:25,196 --> 00:39:26,739 Shut the pie hole. 891 00:39:26,865 --> 00:39:28,908 There were all these heinous, depraved criminals, and well-- 892 00:39:29,033 --> 00:39:29,951 Liar, liar. Whatever, moron. 893 00:39:30,076 --> 00:39:31,452 He sang "Amazing Grace" 894 00:39:31,578 --> 00:39:33,955 and it almost made you forget what he'd done. 895 00:39:34,080 --> 00:39:35,874 Which I don't wanna talk about. 896 00:39:35,999 --> 00:39:37,959 You know, you are so dumb, you may be twins. 897 00:39:38,084 --> 00:39:39,127 He made me promise on a Bible 898 00:39:39,252 --> 00:39:40,253 that I would never tell, and I won't. 899 00:39:40,378 --> 00:39:41,713 So let that be the end of it. 900 00:39:41,838 --> 00:39:44,799 Let me just say this, though. Watch out for hugs. 901 00:39:46,134 --> 00:39:48,678 Right. 902 00:39:48,803 --> 00:39:50,555 ♪ If ever I ♪ 903 00:39:50,680 --> 00:39:53,016 ♪ Have had a friend ♪ 904 00:39:53,141 --> 00:39:57,562 ♪ You've been that friend to me ♪ 905 00:39:57,687 --> 00:40:00,106 ♪ If ever I ♪ 906 00:40:00,231 --> 00:40:03,318 ♪ Have had a friend ♪ 907 00:40:03,443 --> 00:40:06,487 ♪ You've been that friend to me ♪♪ 908 00:40:07,697 --> 00:40:08,907 Thank you. Thank you. 909 00:40:10,700 --> 00:40:12,827 Thank you, GK. 910 00:40:12,952 --> 00:40:16,664 'Mr. Chuck Akers! Thank you, Chuck.' 911 00:40:16,789 --> 00:40:18,333 'Robin and Linda Williams.' 912 00:40:18,458 --> 00:40:20,585 'Let's come in here now with a word about ketchup.' 913 00:40:20,710 --> 00:40:22,587 'Yes, ketchup, made from tomatoes' 914 00:40:22,712 --> 00:40:24,672 'that contain natural sunshine' 915 00:40:24,797 --> 00:40:27,091 'which we need in this part of the country.' 916 00:40:27,216 --> 00:40:28,843 'We are not a sunshiny people.' 917 00:40:28,968 --> 00:40:31,012 'We're not a paradise people or a beach people.' 918 00:40:31,137 --> 00:40:32,639 'We are dark people.' 919 00:40:32,764 --> 00:40:34,849 People who believed it could be worse. 920 00:40:34,974 --> 00:40:37,602 And we're waiting for it to become worse. 921 00:40:37,727 --> 00:40:40,104 We come from people who brought us up to believe 922 00:40:40,229 --> 00:40:42,065 that life is a struggle 923 00:40:42,190 --> 00:40:44,233 and if you should ever feel really happy 924 00:40:44,359 --> 00:40:47,195 be patient. This will pass. 925 00:40:47,320 --> 00:40:49,197 - 'So we could..' - When do you guys go on? 926 00:40:49,322 --> 00:40:53,409 As soon as ol' spud butt here shuts his yapper. 927 00:40:53,534 --> 00:40:55,828 - Thanks for the encouragement. - Hey, you are gonna be great. 928 00:40:55,954 --> 00:40:57,622 - Give me a hug. - Alright, guys. 929 00:40:57,747 --> 00:41:00,291 'More show in just a moment but let's come in here now' 930 00:41:00,416 --> 00:41:04,003 'with a word about shoes! That's guy's shoes. Boys..' 931 00:41:04,128 --> 00:41:06,089 ♪ Talkin' shoes ♪ 932 00:41:06,214 --> 00:41:08,091 ♪ Talkin' guy's ♪ 933 00:41:08,216 --> 00:41:12,136 ♪ Any two any size ♪ 934 00:41:12,261 --> 00:41:14,180 ♪ From your ankles to your toes ♪ 935 00:41:14,305 --> 00:41:16,099 ♪ At the bottom of your clothes ♪ 936 00:41:16,224 --> 00:41:18,267 ♪ You're talkin' shoes ♪ 937 00:41:18,393 --> 00:41:20,728 ♪ Talkin' guy's ♪♪ 938 00:41:20,853 --> 00:41:22,730 'Yes, guy's shoes. They're made to last.' 939 00:41:22,855 --> 00:41:24,732 'Ask about those guy's cash shoes' 940 00:41:24,857 --> 00:41:27,610 with the hole in the soles, so you stash your cash 941 00:41:27,735 --> 00:41:29,862 when you're out on the trail. Isn't that right, Lefty? 942 00:41:29,988 --> 00:41:31,614 - That's where I keep mine, G.K. - Alright. 943 00:41:31,739 --> 00:41:34,409 Let's welcome 'em now, the old trail hands here 944 00:41:34,534 --> 00:41:37,954 the Pachelbels of the Prairie, the Brahmses of the bunkhouse 945 00:41:38,079 --> 00:41:39,872 here they are, Dusty and Lefty. 946 00:41:39,998 --> 00:41:41,457 - Good to have you with us. - Well, thank you, Garrison. 947 00:41:41,582 --> 00:41:43,292 Yes, sir, it's good to be back on the show 948 00:41:43,418 --> 00:41:44,794 because, you know, it gets mighty lonesome 949 00:41:44,919 --> 00:41:46,421 out there on the Prairie. 950 00:41:46,546 --> 00:41:48,881 And a cowboy gets tired of scenery after a while. 951 00:41:49,007 --> 00:41:52,635 You get, well, sceneried out, and, uh 952 00:41:52,760 --> 00:41:55,471 sort of wish you had somebody to talk to. 953 00:41:55,596 --> 00:41:57,598 - Somebody smart. - Hmm. 954 00:41:57,724 --> 00:42:00,059 So you're lonesome for people, huh? 955 00:42:01,561 --> 00:42:03,312 Well, you know, it's true, Garrison 956 00:42:03,438 --> 00:42:06,482 and, uh, it ain't the same just talkin' to your horse. 957 00:42:06,607 --> 00:42:08,818 My horse is extremely smart. 958 00:42:08,943 --> 00:42:10,695 Uh, he knows math. 959 00:42:10,820 --> 00:42:13,281 He knows physics and chemistry 960 00:42:13,406 --> 00:42:15,575 but I can't seem to teach him philosophy. 961 00:42:15,700 --> 00:42:17,285 Can't teach him philosophy, eh? 962 00:42:17,410 --> 00:42:19,579 Well, no. You can't put Descartes before the horse. 963 00:42:19,704 --> 00:42:22,040 'Aww.. That was a good one, you know?' 964 00:42:23,833 --> 00:42:25,501 Well, what do you reckon we sing a song, Dusty? 965 00:42:25,626 --> 00:42:28,963 - Well, let's do it, Lefty. - One, two, you know what to do. 966 00:42:34,010 --> 00:42:35,678 ♪ I'm just an old cowboy ♪ 967 00:42:35,803 --> 00:42:37,722 ♪ With twigs in my hair ♪ 968 00:42:37,847 --> 00:42:39,849 ♪ Two-thirds alligator ♪ 969 00:42:39,974 --> 00:42:41,934 ♪ And three-quarters bear ♪ 970 00:42:42,060 --> 00:42:43,978 ♪ And one half a lion ♪ 971 00:42:44,103 --> 00:42:46,022 ♪ But let it be known ♪ 972 00:42:46,147 --> 00:42:48,107 ♪ I never told one lie ♪ 973 00:42:48,232 --> 00:42:49,400 ♪ That was not my own ♪ 974 00:42:49,525 --> 00:42:52,070 ♪ Whoopi-ti-yi-yo ♪ 975 00:42:52,195 --> 00:42:56,032 ♪ Get along little dogies ♪ 976 00:42:56,157 --> 00:42:58,117 ♪ I eat when I'm hungry ♪ 977 00:42:58,242 --> 00:42:59,952 ♪ I'll drink when I'm dry ♪ 978 00:43:00,078 --> 00:43:01,996 ♪ Don't boss me or cross me ♪ 979 00:43:02,121 --> 00:43:03,915 ♪ Or I'll spit in your eye ♪ 980 00:43:04,040 --> 00:43:05,833 ♪ I think what I please ♪ 981 00:43:05,958 --> 00:43:07,835 ♪ And I say what I mean ♪ 982 00:43:07,960 --> 00:43:09,712 ♪ And I think all you women ♪ 983 00:43:09,837 --> 00:43:11,464 ♪ Are the finest I've seen ♪ 984 00:43:11,589 --> 00:43:14,008 ♪ Whoopi-ti-yi-yo.. ♪ 985 00:43:14,133 --> 00:43:16,969 So my mom said, um.. 986 00:43:17,095 --> 00:43:18,638 My mom said, you got into radio 987 00:43:18,763 --> 00:43:20,723 uh, when someone was flying a kite 988 00:43:20,848 --> 00:43:22,266 whose clothes came off? 989 00:43:22,391 --> 00:43:24,977 A naked man flying. Quite a sight. 990 00:43:25,103 --> 00:43:27,980 Why didn't he pull his shorts up? 991 00:43:28,106 --> 00:43:31,067 He was hanging on to the kite, couldn't let go. 992 00:43:31,192 --> 00:43:32,568 He was up high. 993 00:43:32,693 --> 00:43:34,862 A hundred feet up in the air.. 994 00:43:34,987 --> 00:43:36,739 Fifty. 995 00:43:36,864 --> 00:43:40,493 So, how did that get you into radio? 996 00:43:40,618 --> 00:43:42,036 Well, that was how I met your dad. 997 00:43:43,246 --> 00:43:44,455 Here comes the solo. 998 00:43:53,840 --> 00:43:55,842 - Yeah, real good. - Real good. 999 00:43:55,967 --> 00:43:57,552 - Wait, naked guy.. - Yeah? 1000 00:43:57,677 --> 00:43:58,928 - Was my dad? - Right. 1001 00:44:00,638 --> 00:44:04,308 Naked man with red swim trunks around his ankles. 1002 00:44:04,433 --> 00:44:07,270 Couple thousand people saw it, so we figured it was a good time 1003 00:44:07,395 --> 00:44:09,981 to leave town, so we got a car 1004 00:44:10,106 --> 00:44:11,732 and we headed down to Chicago. 1005 00:44:11,858 --> 00:44:15,319 ♪ We ride in the snow and we ride in the rain ♪ 1006 00:44:15,444 --> 00:44:17,196 ♪ Just like Gene Autry ♪ 1007 00:44:17,321 --> 00:44:19,198 ♪ Just like John Wayne ♪ 1008 00:44:19,323 --> 00:44:20,950 ♪ They were better cowboys ♪ 1009 00:44:21,075 --> 00:44:22,869 ♪ Than us and I mean it ♪ 1010 00:44:22,994 --> 00:44:24,871 ♪ But we are still livin' ♪ 1011 00:44:24,996 --> 00:44:26,956 ♪ And that is convenient ♪ 1012 00:44:27,081 --> 00:44:29,667 ♪ Huh pi-ti-yi-yo ♪ 1013 00:44:29,792 --> 00:44:33,045 ♪ Get along little dogie ♪ 1014 00:44:33,171 --> 00:44:35,548 ♪ Huh pi-ti-yi-yo ♪ 1015 00:44:35,673 --> 00:44:39,844 ♪ Get along little dogies ♪ 1016 00:44:39,969 --> 00:44:41,679 ♪ Yo-de-lai ♪ 1017 00:44:41,804 --> 00:44:44,849 I go in to pay for the gas and he wakes up and decides 1018 00:44:44,974 --> 00:44:48,561 he needs to use the men's room, so I come back. 1019 00:44:48,686 --> 00:44:50,563 I think he's still sleeping in the back seat 1020 00:44:50,688 --> 00:44:54,567 and I get behind the wheel, and I drive to Chicago. 1021 00:44:54,692 --> 00:44:56,152 I leave him there in Oshkosh. 1022 00:44:56,277 --> 00:44:58,613 And he goes into the cafe 1023 00:44:58,738 --> 00:45:01,532 and your mother was the waitress. 1024 00:45:01,657 --> 00:45:02,909 That's how they met. 1025 00:45:03,034 --> 00:45:05,369 That's how I came to be born. 1026 00:45:05,494 --> 00:45:08,539 Well, it kind of led to that, yeah. 1027 00:45:08,664 --> 00:45:09,874 Yeah, but I mean if you had looked 1028 00:45:09,999 --> 00:45:11,375 in the back seat and-and seen 1029 00:45:11,500 --> 00:45:13,336 that he wasn't there, I wouldn't exist. 1030 00:45:13,461 --> 00:45:15,296 Well, he and I weren't gettin' along that well 1031 00:45:15,421 --> 00:45:18,049 so that's why. 1032 00:45:19,217 --> 00:45:21,052 That's really strange. 1033 00:45:21,177 --> 00:45:24,889 Well, no. I think it's one of the most beautiful things 1034 00:45:25,014 --> 00:45:27,058 I ever did not do. 1035 00:45:29,936 --> 00:45:32,563 So how'd you get into radio then? 1036 00:45:32,688 --> 00:45:34,523 Well, there was a show called, uh 1037 00:45:34,649 --> 00:45:36,025 "The Baked Bean Jubilee." 1038 00:45:36,150 --> 00:45:37,818 - Yeah, with my dad. - With your dad, right. 1039 00:45:37,944 --> 00:45:39,695 - Happy baked beans. - Happy baked beans, you know? 1040 00:45:39,820 --> 00:45:42,114 ♪ Happy baked beans ♪ 1041 00:45:42,240 --> 00:45:43,991 Shh! Keep your voices down! 1042 00:45:44,116 --> 00:45:46,369 ♪ Made the natural way ♪ 1043 00:45:46,494 --> 00:45:48,829 Keep your voices down! 1044 00:45:48,955 --> 00:45:50,122 Shh! Shh! Shh! Shh! 1045 00:45:50,248 --> 00:45:51,874 ♪ Try some you will say ♪ 1046 00:45:51,999 --> 00:45:53,251 There's a show going on! 1047 00:45:53,376 --> 00:45:54,335 ♪ They are nature's fruit ♪ 1048 00:45:54,460 --> 00:45:56,587 ♪ Root-ti-toot-toot-toot ♪ 1049 00:45:56,712 --> 00:46:01,926 ♪ Try baked beans every day ♪♪ 1050 00:46:22,989 --> 00:46:24,156 ♪ Ooh baby ♪ 1051 00:46:24,282 --> 00:46:25,908 ♪ You're my man ♪ 1052 00:46:26,033 --> 00:46:28,244 ♪ Ahh ooh you do what.. ♪♪ 1053 00:46:28,369 --> 00:46:30,371 Let's come in here now with some cards and letters 1054 00:46:30,496 --> 00:46:32,873 from the friends and neighbors out there. 1055 00:46:32,999 --> 00:46:35,209 So good to know that you're out there listening. 1056 00:46:35,334 --> 00:46:38,963 Here's a little note here from Aaron, who says our show is a 1057 00:46:39,088 --> 00:46:41,173 source of comfort and laughter for him. And he's hoping-- 1058 00:46:41,299 --> 00:46:42,842 And he's hopin' that the Johnson girls 1059 00:46:42,967 --> 00:46:44,302 he's gonna hear 'em shake their hips a little 1060 00:46:44,427 --> 00:46:46,345 and sing, "Touch Me, Kiss Me, Be My Man." 1061 00:46:46,470 --> 00:46:48,889 No, he was just joking, he says. 1062 00:46:49,015 --> 00:46:50,057 Just joking about that. 1063 00:46:50,182 --> 00:46:51,726 He was hoping that we would sing, uh 1064 00:46:51,851 --> 00:46:52,935 "Gold Watch And Chain." 1065 00:46:53,060 --> 00:46:54,312 - Oh. Oh, I bet. - Yolanda. 1066 00:46:54,437 --> 00:46:57,273 Yolanda and I. So let's bring up Yolanda here. 1067 00:46:57,398 --> 00:47:01,360 This beautiful old song "Gold Watch And Chain." Boys. 1068 00:47:06,198 --> 00:47:10,828 ♪ Darlin' how can I stay here without you? ♪ 1069 00:47:10,953 --> 00:47:15,666 ♪ I have nothing to ease my poor heart ♪ 1070 00:47:15,791 --> 00:47:20,504 ♪ All the world would seem sad dear Without you ♪ 1071 00:47:20,629 --> 00:47:25,259 ♪ Tell me now that we never will part ♪ 1072 00:47:25,384 --> 00:47:30,056 ♪ I will pawn you my gold watch and chain love ♪ 1073 00:47:30,181 --> 00:47:34,935 ♪ I will pawn you my gold wedding ring ♪ 1074 00:47:35,061 --> 00:47:37,229 ♪ I will pawn you this... ♪♪ 1075 00:47:37,355 --> 00:47:38,606 - Molly? - 'What?' 1076 00:47:38,731 --> 00:47:40,691 Would you come here a moment? 1077 00:47:40,816 --> 00:47:43,527 What is it, Guy? 1078 00:47:43,652 --> 00:47:46,197 Um, I just want to.. 1079 00:47:46,322 --> 00:47:48,199 Oh.. 1080 00:47:48,324 --> 00:47:50,493 You are fat. 1081 00:47:53,245 --> 00:47:55,539 Y-you might think about cutting down 1082 00:47:55,664 --> 00:47:58,959 on the, urn, desserts and the beer. 1083 00:47:59,085 --> 00:48:03,047 And also possibly sex with men. 1084 00:48:03,172 --> 00:48:05,841 W-When did-when did this take place? 1085 00:48:05,966 --> 00:48:07,676 Who-who did this to you? 1086 00:48:09,345 --> 00:48:11,430 Ah, yes, Lefty, Dusty 1087 00:48:11,555 --> 00:48:13,391 are-are you boys aware of this? 1088 00:48:13,516 --> 00:48:17,269 O-our little girl's going to be a-a single mom. 1089 00:48:17,395 --> 00:48:19,063 - You poor thing. - Thank you. 1090 00:48:19,188 --> 00:48:20,398 I'll swear on a stack of Bibles 1091 00:48:20,523 --> 00:48:21,649 it wasn't me, darlin'. 1092 00:48:21,774 --> 00:48:24,527 Oh, that's great to know, Dusty. Thanks. 1093 00:48:24,652 --> 00:48:26,862 ♪ Do not scorn her ♪ 1094 00:48:26,987 --> 00:48:30,825 ♪ With words fierce and bitter ♪ 1095 00:48:30,950 --> 00:48:35,913 ♪ Do not laugh at her shame and downfall ♪ 1096 00:48:36,038 --> 00:48:37,456 You should sit. 1097 00:48:37,581 --> 00:48:42,086 ♪ For a moment just stop and consider ♪ 1098 00:48:42,211 --> 00:48:43,671 Just ignore them. 1099 00:48:43,796 --> 00:48:50,010 ♪ That a man was the cause of it all ♪♪ 1100 00:48:50,136 --> 00:48:52,805 - 'Dusty!' -Yo! 1101 00:48:52,930 --> 00:48:56,600 That reminds me. About that obscene song you sang last week. 1102 00:48:56,725 --> 00:48:58,310 - Obscene? Uh-- - Yeah. 1103 00:48:58,436 --> 00:49:01,230 "I'll give you my moonshine if you Show me your jugs?" 1104 00:49:01,355 --> 00:49:03,274 No, not that one. 1105 00:49:03,399 --> 00:49:05,693 "Lovin' you ain't easy, but I hear your sister is?" 1106 00:49:05,818 --> 00:49:07,862 No, no, no. "Come ride my pony all night long. 1107 00:49:07,987 --> 00:49:10,030 "Come ride him bareback I'll sing you a song." That one. 1108 00:49:10,156 --> 00:49:12,158 That's just a song about ridin' a pony. 1109 00:49:12,283 --> 00:49:13,826 Mmm. 1110 00:49:13,951 --> 00:49:15,828 Oh, what-what the hell did you think it was about? 1111 00:49:15,953 --> 00:49:19,290 Let's go out with a little style, okay? What do you say? 1112 00:49:19,415 --> 00:49:21,876 - "Go out?" What do you mean? - Just what I said. 1113 00:49:22,001 --> 00:49:24,086 "Go out?" You mean me? 1114 00:49:24,211 --> 00:49:25,671 All of us. 1115 00:49:25,796 --> 00:49:28,007 What the Sam Hill are you talkin' about, mister? 1116 00:49:28,132 --> 00:49:30,801 Got some nice egg salad sandwiches if you're hungry. 1117 00:49:30,926 --> 00:49:33,804 - No gunplay backstage. - I'm hungry. I'm always hungry. 1118 00:49:33,929 --> 00:49:35,139 Did you know that she's pregnant? 1119 00:49:35,264 --> 00:49:38,017 ♪ And can't be returned ♪ 1120 00:49:38,142 --> 00:49:42,771 ♪ You have left me and gone to another ♪ 1121 00:49:42,897 --> 00:49:47,318 ♪ All my hopes and bridges are burned ♪ 1122 00:49:47,443 --> 00:49:52,364 ♪ But I will pawn you my gold watch and chain love ♪ 1123 00:49:52,490 --> 00:49:57,411 ♪ And I will pawn you my gold wedding ring ♪ 1124 00:49:57,536 --> 00:50:02,333 ♪ I will pawn you this heart in my bosom ♪ 1125 00:50:02,458 --> 00:50:07,004 ♪ Only say that you'll love me again ♪ 1126 00:50:07,129 --> 00:50:11,759 ♪ Only say that you'll love me again ♪ 1127 00:50:11,884 --> 00:50:16,555 ♪ Only say that you'll love me again ♪♪ 1128 00:50:19,808 --> 00:50:22,811 Thank you, Yolanda. What a beautiful, beautiful song. 1129 00:50:22,937 --> 00:50:24,855 This portion of our show is brought to you 1130 00:50:24,980 --> 00:50:26,357 by powder milk biscuits 1131 00:50:26,482 --> 00:50:29,527 and also brought to you by duct tape. 1132 00:50:29,652 --> 00:50:33,656 Duct tape. Yes, duct tape. Duct tape. 1133 00:50:33,781 --> 00:50:36,075 Useful thing around the household 1134 00:50:36,200 --> 00:50:38,953 almost anything that comes up around the household. 1135 00:50:39,078 --> 00:50:42,289 Sometimes you need to make repairs, doors come loose 1136 00:50:42,414 --> 00:50:45,417 and windows, all sorts of things can happen. 1137 00:50:45,543 --> 00:50:47,753 Sometimes you just forget something 1138 00:50:47,878 --> 00:50:51,298 that you're looking for and duct tape can come in handy. 1139 00:50:51,423 --> 00:50:52,883 You can wrap it around your finger 1140 00:50:53,008 --> 00:50:54,885 like a string or something. 1141 00:50:55,010 --> 00:50:56,428 You can just tape it up. Whatever. 1142 00:50:56,554 --> 00:50:58,055 Things do tend to fall apart, you know. 1143 00:50:58,180 --> 00:51:02,142 Confusion reins endemic in our world today. 1144 00:51:02,268 --> 00:51:04,103 - Just things tend to drift-- - Oh, jeez. 1145 00:51:04,228 --> 00:51:06,689 And especially as you get to be older 1146 00:51:06,814 --> 00:51:08,816 duct tape is the most useful thing you'll find. 1147 00:51:08,941 --> 00:51:11,527 All repairs are short term. We know that. 1148 00:51:11,652 --> 00:51:15,197 Say a faucet should be dripping and you, and you.. 1149 00:51:17,116 --> 00:51:18,867 The water is falling there, dripping onto your cupboard 1150 00:51:18,993 --> 00:51:22,371 and the-and the wood comes loose from the wall 1151 00:51:22,496 --> 00:51:24,331 and you need something to fix it. 1152 00:51:24,456 --> 00:51:27,084 Just reach for a roll of duct tape. 1153 00:51:27,209 --> 00:51:29,211 That would be the-the perfect thing. 1154 00:51:29,336 --> 00:51:32,298 Or maybe your orangutano's been jumpin' up and down on it. 1155 00:51:34,049 --> 00:51:36,385 The weight of the orangutan has, like, you know, crushed 1156 00:51:36,510 --> 00:51:39,680 uh, crushed part of the counter and-and then your rottweiler 1157 00:51:39,805 --> 00:51:41,348 'he comes runnin' out and he bites the orangutan' 1158 00:51:41,473 --> 00:51:43,267 'in the hinder. Gets him all riled up.' 1159 00:51:45,519 --> 00:51:47,938 The rottweiler, actually, is locked in the basement. 1160 00:51:48,063 --> 00:51:49,189 Sorry to correct you there, Rhonda. 1161 00:51:49,315 --> 00:51:50,316 I can hear them goin' at it. 1162 00:51:50,441 --> 00:51:51,609 He's down locked in the basement. 1163 00:51:51,734 --> 00:51:52,693 The rottweiler and the orangutan. 1164 00:51:52,818 --> 00:51:53,944 A double lock there. 1165 00:51:54,069 --> 00:51:55,529 Because the, uh, the orangutan, you know 1166 00:51:55,654 --> 00:51:57,906 they got, uh, the fingers and he's got a saw. 1167 00:52:00,284 --> 00:52:01,201 A chainsaw. 1168 00:52:03,162 --> 00:52:05,289 He cut a big hole in the door and the rottweiler got out. 1169 00:52:05,414 --> 00:52:07,499 That's how he bit the orangutan in the hinder. 1170 00:52:09,710 --> 00:52:12,254 And then-and then don't forget about the peacock. 1171 00:52:14,548 --> 00:52:16,342 'And then the, uh, flock, overhead there was' 1172 00:52:16,467 --> 00:52:18,427 'a big helicopter came flyin' through.' 1173 00:52:20,346 --> 00:52:22,014 'Right through a flock of Canadian geese.' 1174 00:52:23,891 --> 00:52:26,894 And, uh, really was gettin' someone's goose was cooked. 1175 00:52:27,019 --> 00:52:28,437 And then they startled the peacock. 1176 00:52:30,356 --> 00:52:31,690 - Yeah! Then-- - And then this-this sick-- 1177 00:52:31,815 --> 00:52:33,484 - The peacock-- - No, wait. This sadist. 1178 00:52:33,609 --> 00:52:36,487 This sadist in, uh, sneakers was creepin' up on everybody. 1179 00:52:36,612 --> 00:52:38,697 And the peacock, he, uh.. 1180 00:52:40,199 --> 00:52:41,700 He jumps right at the orangutan. 1181 00:52:41,825 --> 00:52:47,414 His beak, yeah is flashing like a scimitar. 1182 00:52:47,539 --> 00:52:50,584 Yeah, but the, uh, but his aim is, uh, goes awry and it.. 1183 00:52:50,709 --> 00:52:52,336 'And-and then, um--' 1184 00:52:52,461 --> 00:52:53,796 'He takes that chainsaw and he throws it.' 1185 00:52:53,921 --> 00:52:55,631 The orangutan throws it at the peacock. 1186 00:52:55,756 --> 00:52:57,132 But he's got a bad aim. The aim. 1187 00:52:57,257 --> 00:53:00,094 It goes right through a plate-glass window. 1188 00:53:00,219 --> 00:53:01,178 'But it almost..' 1189 00:53:02,763 --> 00:53:05,516 - Yeah, hits the mailman. - Wow! Oh! 1190 00:53:05,641 --> 00:53:08,602 Murray. But doesn't. It misses him by inches. 1191 00:53:08,727 --> 00:53:11,397 And by the way, he's bringin' you a letter 1192 00:53:11,522 --> 00:53:14,233 from your ex-girlfriend. Remember her? 1193 00:53:14,358 --> 00:53:17,569 Who is still furious at you for having dumped her. 1194 00:53:17,695 --> 00:53:20,572 You know, just thrown her aside 1195 00:53:20,698 --> 00:53:22,241 the woman who loved you. 1196 00:53:22,366 --> 00:53:23,409 Just because you found somebody new. 1197 00:53:23,534 --> 00:53:25,661 How could you do that? 1198 00:53:25,786 --> 00:53:29,081 She will never understand, and, um.. 1199 00:53:29,206 --> 00:53:31,792 ...duct tape isn't going to help you with that one bit. 1200 00:53:31,917 --> 00:53:33,377 No, I suppose not, but with two out of-- 1201 00:53:33,502 --> 00:53:34,670 And duct tape is not going to make 1202 00:53:34,795 --> 00:53:36,213 an honest man out of you. 1203 00:53:36,338 --> 00:53:38,882 No, it won't. But with two out of three chores 1204 00:53:39,007 --> 00:53:40,509 around the home, duct tape. 1205 00:53:40,634 --> 00:53:42,261 And it isn't going to help you find whatever it was 1206 00:53:42,386 --> 00:53:44,680 you were lookin' for, so.. What were you lookin' for? 1207 00:53:44,805 --> 00:53:46,348 I was lookin' for duct tape. Duct tape. 1208 00:53:46,473 --> 00:53:48,225 All repairs are temporary and short term. 1209 00:53:48,350 --> 00:53:49,685 It's almost just about the only thing 1210 00:53:49,810 --> 00:53:53,147 that really works sometimes, and that is duct tape. 1211 00:53:53,272 --> 00:53:55,774 More of A Prairie Home Companion here in just a moment 1212 00:53:55,899 --> 00:53:58,986 right after we come in with a word about coffee. 1213 00:53:59,111 --> 00:54:03,031 Yes, Jearlyn, nothing stimulates a person 1214 00:54:03,157 --> 00:54:07,786 keeps you focused quite like good old caffeine. 1215 00:54:07,911 --> 00:54:10,581 - Black coffee. - 'Mmm. So good.' 1216 00:54:10,706 --> 00:54:12,833 I'm glad you like it, too. 1217 00:54:14,710 --> 00:54:16,670 ♪ Smells so lovely when you pour it ♪ 1218 00:54:16,795 --> 00:54:20,007 ♪ You will want to drink a quart of coffee ♪ 1219 00:54:22,092 --> 00:54:23,719 ♪ It's delicious all alone ♪ 1220 00:54:23,844 --> 00:54:25,971 ♪ It's also good with donuts ♪ 1221 00:54:26,096 --> 00:54:29,224 ♪ Black coffee ♪ 1222 00:54:29,349 --> 00:54:31,226 ♪ Coffee stimulates your urges ♪ 1223 00:54:31,351 --> 00:54:32,853 ♪ It's served in Lutheran churches ♪ 1224 00:54:32,978 --> 00:54:34,855 ♪ Keeps the Swedes and the Germans ♪ 1225 00:54:34,980 --> 00:54:36,273 ♪ Awake through the sermons ♪ 1226 00:54:36,398 --> 00:54:38,233 ♪ Have a pot of it today ♪ 1227 00:54:38,358 --> 00:54:41,612 ♪ I'm sure you'll say it's awfully good coffee ♪♪ 1228 00:54:48,410 --> 00:54:51,580 'Chuck? I'm ready for you now.' 1229 00:54:53,207 --> 00:54:54,166 'Chuck?' 1230 00:54:54,291 --> 00:54:56,084 ♪ Much too long ♪♪ 1231 00:54:56,210 --> 00:54:59,004 'Hey, you decent? Chuck?' 1232 00:55:01,131 --> 00:55:02,925 Whoa! 1233 00:55:03,050 --> 00:55:06,220 Chuck, what you got goin' in here, huh? 1234 00:55:08,096 --> 00:55:12,601 Candles and music and.. Hey, hey, wake up, buddy. 1235 00:55:13,685 --> 00:55:15,521 Hey, Chu.. 1236 00:55:15,646 --> 00:55:16,980 Chuck? 1237 00:55:17,105 --> 00:55:21,151 ♪ Oh my Lord does just what He said ♪ 1238 00:55:21,276 --> 00:55:25,072 ♪ Let the light from the lighthouse shine on me ♪ 1239 00:55:25,197 --> 00:55:29,076 ♪ He healed the sick and He raised the dead ♪ 1240 00:55:29,201 --> 00:55:33,580 ♪ Let the light from the lighthouse shine on me ♪ 1241 00:55:33,705 --> 00:55:35,207 ♪ Shine on ♪ 1242 00:55:35,332 --> 00:55:37,209 ♪ Let it shine on ♪ 1243 00:55:37,334 --> 00:55:41,630 ♪ Let the light from the lighthouse shine on me ♪ 1244 00:55:46,760 --> 00:55:50,222 ♪ From the lighthouse shine on me ♪ 1245 00:55:53,725 --> 00:55:57,479 ♪ Let the light from the lighthouse shine on me ♪ 1246 00:55:57,604 --> 00:56:01,567 ♪ Oh this whole world's gonna reel and rock ♪ 1247 00:56:01,692 --> 00:56:05,529 ♪ Let the light from the lighthouse shine on me ♪ 1248 00:56:07,489 --> 00:56:14,037 Honey? It's me. Ready or not, here I come. 1249 00:56:14,162 --> 00:56:17,416 I am lookin' for a big hot dog 1250 00:56:17,541 --> 00:56:20,168 to put in my bun, you old dog, you. 1251 00:56:20,294 --> 00:56:22,254 Why you hidin' from me? 1252 00:56:23,505 --> 00:56:26,341 Wake up. Wake up, sugar. 1253 00:56:32,639 --> 00:56:34,683 Oh! 1254 00:56:34,808 --> 00:56:36,351 Chuck? 1255 00:56:39,938 --> 00:56:42,190 Chuck! Chuck! 1256 00:56:42,316 --> 00:56:46,194 It's okay. It's okay. It's okay. 1257 00:56:46,320 --> 00:56:48,530 But how can he be dead? 1258 00:56:48,655 --> 00:56:50,449 He just went away, that's all. 1259 00:56:50,574 --> 00:56:52,034 Oh, my Chuck. 1260 00:56:53,577 --> 00:56:55,162 My baby. 1261 00:56:55,287 --> 00:56:58,165 The death of an old man is not a tragedy. 1262 00:56:58,290 --> 00:57:00,042 Oh.. 1263 00:57:00,167 --> 00:57:01,919 I don't want him to go. 1264 00:57:03,295 --> 00:57:05,672 Forgive him his shortcomings 1265 00:57:05,797 --> 00:57:07,925 and thank him for all of his love and care. 1266 00:57:09,551 --> 00:57:12,971 ♪ Shine on let it shine on ♪ 1267 00:57:13,096 --> 00:57:17,017 ♪ Let the light from the lighthouse shine on me ♪ 1268 00:57:17,142 --> 00:57:19,144 Goodbye, baby. 1269 00:57:19,269 --> 00:57:21,063 ♪ Let it shine on ♪ 1270 00:57:21,188 --> 00:57:25,567 ♪ Let the light from the lighthouse shine on me ♪ 1271 00:57:25,692 --> 00:57:28,570 ♪ Shine let it shine ♪ 1272 00:57:28,695 --> 00:57:33,325 ♪ Let the light from the lighthouse shine on me ♪ 1273 00:57:33,450 --> 00:57:34,826 ♪ Shine ♪ 1274 00:57:34,952 --> 00:57:36,703 ♪ Let it shine ♪ 1275 00:57:36,828 --> 00:57:40,123 ♪ Let the light from the lighthouse ♪ 1276 00:57:40,248 --> 00:57:46,129 ♪ Shine on ♪ 1277 00:57:46,254 --> 00:57:50,342 ♪ Me ♪♪ 1278 00:57:55,263 --> 00:57:56,515 Thank you so much. 1279 00:57:56,640 --> 00:57:58,767 Time to break now for station identification. 1280 00:57:58,892 --> 00:58:01,812 And we'll be right back with more right after this. 1281 00:58:11,780 --> 00:58:13,865 'Ladies and gentlemen, we are now at nine minutes' 1282 00:58:13,991 --> 00:58:15,993 'to broadcast, please. Nine minutes.' 1283 00:58:17,536 --> 00:58:19,079 Hey. No smokin', mister. 1284 00:58:21,081 --> 00:58:25,460 Chuck Akers is dead. He's gone. 1285 00:58:25,585 --> 00:58:28,088 I don't follow your reasoning there. 1286 00:58:29,673 --> 00:58:32,092 I said Chuck is dead. 1287 00:58:33,635 --> 00:58:35,595 - Who's dead? - Chuck. 1288 00:58:38,140 --> 00:58:40,976 - When? - Now. 1289 00:58:41,101 --> 00:58:42,853 He just died now? 1290 00:58:42,978 --> 00:58:44,354 I don't know when the hell he died. 1291 00:58:44,479 --> 00:58:46,773 I wasn't there. 1292 00:58:46,898 --> 00:58:48,942 What was the approximate time of death? 1293 00:58:49,067 --> 00:58:51,695 Recent. Why don't you go check it out for yourself. 1294 00:58:51,820 --> 00:58:52,988 He's in there. 1295 00:58:54,406 --> 00:58:57,492 Does anyone else know about this? 1296 00:58:57,617 --> 00:58:58,952 I have no idea. 1297 00:58:59,077 --> 00:59:00,203 Because if anyone else knows about this 1298 00:59:00,328 --> 00:59:01,288 and they're not saying anything 1299 00:59:01,413 --> 00:59:02,622 I need to know about that. 1300 00:59:09,921 --> 00:59:11,256 Excuse me. 1301 00:59:19,014 --> 00:59:20,724 I used to listen to your show.. 1302 00:59:22,601 --> 00:59:24,478 ...until I died. 1303 00:59:26,646 --> 00:59:28,815 My name was Lois Peterson. 1304 00:59:31,693 --> 00:59:33,653 I was driving up to this cabin up north 1305 00:59:33,779 --> 00:59:36,990 and you were telling a story and I was laughing. 1306 00:59:38,909 --> 00:59:41,036 And then the car skidded off the road 1307 00:59:41,161 --> 00:59:42,704 and into a ditch and it flipped. 1308 00:59:42,829 --> 00:59:45,791 And as it did, the thought 1309 00:59:45,916 --> 00:59:48,251 occurred to me that 1310 00:59:48,376 --> 00:59:50,295 the story just wasn't that funny. 1311 00:59:53,131 --> 00:59:59,596 And then I was standing in this tall grass 1312 00:59:59,721 --> 01:00:02,390 looking down at my own body. 1313 01:00:02,516 --> 01:00:04,017 Hmm. 1314 01:00:04,142 --> 01:00:07,187 So sorry. 1315 01:00:07,312 --> 01:00:10,107 'I was on my way to that cabin to meet my lover Larry.' 1316 01:00:11,691 --> 01:00:15,570 We had been planning it for over two months. 1317 01:00:15,695 --> 01:00:16,780 'Oh'. 1318 01:00:16,905 --> 01:00:20,700 And because of your story 1319 01:00:20,826 --> 01:00:23,495 I lost control and I died. 1320 01:00:23,620 --> 01:00:25,747 - So.. - I'm so sorry. 1321 01:00:25,872 --> 01:00:28,500 So you killed me in a way. 1322 01:00:28,625 --> 01:00:29,709 Isn't that interesting? 1323 01:00:30,877 --> 01:00:34,381 He's, uh... quite dead. 1324 01:00:34,506 --> 01:00:35,966 'Just a half an hour ago he was walkin' around' 1325 01:00:36,091 --> 01:00:38,593 'Exchangin' the gases with the atmosphere.' 1326 01:00:38,718 --> 01:00:40,762 Well, there's a lot more out than in now. 1327 01:00:40,887 --> 01:00:43,181 - We should call the cops. - No. 1328 01:00:43,306 --> 01:00:46,017 When the time is right, I'll make the call. 1329 01:00:46,143 --> 01:00:50,147 You... just, um.. 1330 01:00:50,272 --> 01:00:51,606 Don't talk about this to anyone. Alright? 1331 01:00:51,731 --> 01:00:53,233 Keep it under your hat. 1332 01:00:53,358 --> 01:00:54,317 Go about your business. 1333 01:00:58,947 --> 01:01:00,615 I'm gonna secure the area. 1334 01:01:00,740 --> 01:01:02,659 Let's get on with the show. 1335 01:01:02,784 --> 01:01:03,910 You gonna be alright? 1336 01:01:05,287 --> 01:01:07,747 Yeah, I'll be alright. 1337 01:01:11,001 --> 01:01:13,920 - So you're really an angel? - Of course. 1338 01:01:14,045 --> 01:01:17,007 Hmm. What do you do? 1339 01:01:17,132 --> 01:01:18,633 - Well, that's a dumb question. - No, no. 1340 01:01:18,758 --> 01:01:20,468 I, uh, I do lots of things. 1341 01:01:20,594 --> 01:01:23,722 I comfort people that are desperately sad. 1342 01:01:23,847 --> 01:01:25,974 And... l make 1343 01:01:26,099 --> 01:01:29,769 personal appearances. I.. 1344 01:01:29,895 --> 01:01:32,397 Tears on a statue. 1345 01:01:32,522 --> 01:01:33,732 One time I put the face of the lord 1346 01:01:33,857 --> 01:01:35,150 on a bowl of oatmeal. 1347 01:01:36,902 --> 01:01:39,112 Just to cheer people up. You know, those kind of things. 1348 01:01:39,237 --> 01:01:40,864 But mostly I.. 1349 01:01:40,989 --> 01:01:42,949 I take people up to see God. 1350 01:01:44,534 --> 01:01:46,661 That's why I'm here. 1351 01:01:46,786 --> 01:01:50,624 But I-I just keep thinking about that story 1352 01:01:50,749 --> 01:01:54,377 and why it was funny. 1353 01:01:54,502 --> 01:01:56,463 'The story I told on the radio?' 1354 01:01:56,588 --> 01:01:58,798 - It was about penguins. - Oh. 1355 01:01:58,924 --> 01:02:00,300 The penguin joke. 1356 01:02:02,510 --> 01:02:04,346 Two penguins standing on an ice floe. 1357 01:02:04,471 --> 01:02:05,764 That's the one. 1358 01:02:05,889 --> 01:02:08,016 'And the first penguin says' 1359 01:02:08,141 --> 01:02:10,060 "'You look like you're wearing a tuxedo. 1360 01:02:11,728 --> 01:02:13,313 And the second penguin says 1361 01:02:13,438 --> 01:02:14,981 "What makes you think I'm not?" 1362 01:02:18,735 --> 01:02:20,070 - Is there more? - No. 1363 01:02:20,195 --> 01:02:21,404 - That's the joke? - Mm-hmm. 1364 01:02:21,529 --> 01:02:23,782 Why is that funny? 1365 01:02:23,907 --> 01:02:27,035 I guess it's funny because people laugh at it. 1366 01:02:27,160 --> 01:02:28,245 I'm not laughing. 1367 01:02:29,955 --> 01:02:31,498 You're an angel. 1368 01:02:35,252 --> 01:02:37,671 'G.K. to the stage, please. G.K. to the stage, please.' 1369 01:02:37,796 --> 01:02:40,257 - I should probably go. - Oh yes, of course. 1370 01:02:40,382 --> 01:02:42,968 - I didn't come for you. - Oh. Okay. 1371 01:02:44,427 --> 01:02:46,012 Alright. I think they're waiting for me. 1372 01:02:46,137 --> 01:02:47,555 Oh, wh.. 1373 01:02:47,681 --> 01:02:50,016 What did the second penguin say? 1374 01:02:50,141 --> 01:02:51,685 The second penguin said 1375 01:02:51,810 --> 01:02:54,688 "What makes you think I'm not?" 1376 01:02:54,813 --> 01:02:55,981 - Okay? - Okay. 1377 01:02:56,106 --> 01:02:57,315 Alright. See you. 1378 01:02:58,817 --> 01:03:02,612 - Take your time. - 'Thanks.' 1379 01:03:02,737 --> 01:03:05,532 'Two minutes from broadcast. Two minutes, please.' 1380 01:03:09,035 --> 01:03:09,953 Could I have a word with you? 1381 01:03:11,871 --> 01:03:14,332 Uh, we have a situation here 1382 01:03:14,457 --> 01:03:15,750 um, which we are monitoring 1383 01:03:15,875 --> 01:03:17,752 but I wanted you to be apprised of it. 1384 01:03:19,796 --> 01:03:21,840 You mean the woman in the white trench coat? 1385 01:03:21,965 --> 01:03:23,550 No, there's a woman in a w.. 1386 01:03:23,675 --> 01:03:24,884 A white trench coat, yes. 1387 01:03:25,010 --> 01:03:26,386 - You saw her? - I saw her over here. 1388 01:03:26,511 --> 01:03:27,470 You spoke to her? 1389 01:03:27,595 --> 01:03:29,681 You, no, you were talking to her. 1390 01:03:29,806 --> 01:03:32,225 - You saw that? - Yeah. You. 1391 01:03:32,350 --> 01:03:33,518 Well, if you see her in the audience 1392 01:03:33,643 --> 01:03:35,103 I need you to give me a high sign. 1393 01:03:35,228 --> 01:03:37,105 Just use, give me a signal with your hand. 1394 01:03:37,230 --> 01:03:40,900 Do, uh.. No. Do.. Here, do it behind your back. 1395 01:03:41,026 --> 01:03:42,902 - Just will.. Rabbit tail? - Just wiggle. 1396 01:03:43,028 --> 01:03:44,988 Yeah, and give me a verbal, uh, sign. 1397 01:03:45,113 --> 01:03:48,533 Some-something in code. Just say, uh, indemnity. 1398 01:03:48,658 --> 01:03:49,576 Indemnity. Yeah. 1399 01:03:49,701 --> 01:03:50,660 - Okay. - Or no. 1400 01:03:50,785 --> 01:03:52,912 - Granite Falls. - Okay. 1401 01:03:53,038 --> 01:03:55,081 How does that, how does that go? Granite falls? 1402 01:03:55,206 --> 01:03:57,375 Well, you just say, uh.. Then we would like to do a song now 1403 01:03:57,500 --> 01:04:00,837 for our dear friends in Granite Falls. 1404 01:04:00,962 --> 01:04:02,130 - Okay. Alright. - Okay. 1405 01:04:02,255 --> 01:04:05,133 And then if I miss that, uh.. 1406 01:04:05,258 --> 01:04:08,636 This'll be a cue for Rich to do a-a musical turn. 1407 01:04:12,891 --> 01:04:14,517 - That's the code. - Code? 1408 01:04:14,642 --> 01:04:16,895 Then I'll get it. Okay? 1409 01:04:17,020 --> 01:04:19,439 That's how I got into radio, actually. Morse code. 1410 01:04:19,564 --> 01:04:22,692 I was a deckhand on a, on a boat. 1411 01:04:22,817 --> 01:04:24,444 Big storm. November. 1412 01:04:24,569 --> 01:04:25,779 I'll never forget it. 1413 01:04:25,904 --> 01:04:27,280 You got on the ship radio 1414 01:04:27,405 --> 01:04:28,990 and you told jokes and you sang for two hours 1415 01:04:29,115 --> 01:04:30,658 until the ship came in safely to port. 1416 01:04:30,784 --> 01:04:31,701 Right. 1417 01:04:31,826 --> 01:04:33,036 I told you that story? 1418 01:04:33,161 --> 01:04:34,371 - Granite Falls. - G.K.? 1419 01:04:34,496 --> 01:04:36,081 - Granite falls. Right. - Yeah? 1420 01:04:36,206 --> 01:04:38,541 If you see G.K. do that behind his back.. 1421 01:04:38,666 --> 01:04:39,959 It's your cue to go like this. 1422 01:04:42,337 --> 01:04:44,130 So what are you gonna do for work after this? 1423 01:04:44,255 --> 01:04:46,591 I don't know. I'll find a job somewhere. 1424 01:04:46,716 --> 01:04:48,593 Like where? 1425 01:04:48,718 --> 01:04:51,888 A job where I never have to say a word. 1426 01:04:52,013 --> 01:04:55,809 - Why? - That's why. Right there. 1427 01:04:55,934 --> 01:04:58,311 What're you gonna do? Like be an underwear model or something? 1428 01:04:58,436 --> 01:05:00,688 - If they ask, sure. - You're on. 1429 01:05:00,814 --> 01:05:01,731 Thanks. 1430 01:05:04,692 --> 01:05:07,570 And we're back with more of "A Prairie Home Companion" 1431 01:05:07,695 --> 01:05:11,449 brought to you by the Federation of Associated Organizations. 1432 01:05:11,574 --> 01:05:15,245 Somewhere there's an organization just for you. 1433 01:05:15,370 --> 01:05:16,538 And brought to you by Fred Farrell 1434 01:05:16,663 --> 01:05:17,914 the name you've gradually come to trust 1435 01:05:18,039 --> 01:05:20,333 when it comes to animal nuisance control. 1436 01:05:20,458 --> 01:05:21,835 "The Johnson Girls" coming up 1437 01:05:21,960 --> 01:05:24,879 and the old trail-hands, Dusty and Lefty are with us 1438 01:05:25,004 --> 01:05:27,173 and our good friend Jearlyn Steele. Jearlyn. 1439 01:05:38,435 --> 01:05:43,523 ♪ The day is short ♪ 1440 01:05:43,648 --> 01:05:49,070 ♪ The night is long ♪ 1441 01:05:49,195 --> 01:05:54,075 ♪ Why do we work so hard? ♪ 1442 01:05:54,200 --> 01:05:58,455 ♪ To get what we don't even want? ♪ 1443 01:06:02,041 --> 01:06:03,460 ♪ To get ahead of the game ♪ 1444 01:06:03,585 --> 01:06:04,502 'It's time for me to go.' 1445 01:06:09,048 --> 01:06:10,175 Oh. 1446 01:06:11,342 --> 01:06:13,636 I am the Angel Asphodel. 1447 01:06:13,761 --> 01:06:17,223 I come here to do my work and bring mercy into the world 1448 01:06:17,348 --> 01:06:19,267 and praise His Holy Name. 1449 01:06:20,143 --> 01:06:21,561 Okay. 1450 01:06:21,686 --> 01:06:22,645 That's fine with me. 1451 01:06:22,770 --> 01:06:24,481 You wanna be an angel? 1452 01:06:24,606 --> 01:06:27,942 I say you, you be an angel. 1453 01:06:28,067 --> 01:06:29,652 You're angelic enough for me. 1454 01:06:31,446 --> 01:06:32,989 I say spread your wings and fly. 1455 01:06:34,657 --> 01:06:36,242 This is a revelation. 1456 01:06:38,453 --> 01:06:40,330 For the both of us. 1457 01:06:40,455 --> 01:06:42,540 Listen, if you're an angel, I, uh.. 1458 01:06:42,665 --> 01:06:45,543 I wonder if you and me were to, uh.. 1459 01:06:47,045 --> 01:06:49,005 You know. 1460 01:06:49,130 --> 01:06:50,465 Would you.. 1461 01:06:50,590 --> 01:06:52,091 ...feel anything? 1462 01:06:53,760 --> 01:06:55,512 I would feel love. 1463 01:07:00,225 --> 01:07:02,685 ♪ And daddy's on the way ♪ 1464 01:07:02,810 --> 01:07:07,232 ♪ The day is short ♪ 1465 01:07:07,357 --> 01:07:13,613 ♪ The night is long ♪ 1466 01:07:13,738 --> 01:07:18,660 ♪ Why do you work so hard? ♪ 1467 01:07:18,785 --> 01:07:22,580 ♪ To get what you don't even want? ♪ 1468 01:07:39,138 --> 01:07:40,473 You can wait here. This won't take long. 1469 01:07:45,728 --> 01:07:49,983 ♪ The day is short. ♪ 1470 01:07:50,108 --> 01:07:51,359 - Do you have a ticket? - I'm with the company. 1471 01:07:51,484 --> 01:07:56,531 ♪ The night is long ♪ 1472 01:07:56,656 --> 01:08:03,204 ♪ Why do you work so hard ♪ 1473 01:08:04,872 --> 01:08:06,291 ♪ To get ♪ 1474 01:08:06,416 --> 01:08:10,336 ♪ What you don't even ♪ 1475 01:08:10,461 --> 01:08:14,340 ♪ Want? ♪♪ 1476 01:08:19,637 --> 01:08:21,097 - You got a problem with horses? - Oh, no, no, no. 1477 01:08:21,222 --> 01:08:24,183 Just, please behave. That's all I'm askin'. 1478 01:08:24,309 --> 01:08:25,435 - Al, Al. - Yeah? 1479 01:08:25,560 --> 01:08:26,519 There's somethin' wrong with this bulb. 1480 01:08:26,644 --> 01:08:27,770 No, no. It's supposed to blink. 1481 01:08:27,895 --> 01:08:29,355 That's my.. So it doesn't ring. 1482 01:08:29,480 --> 01:08:31,107 That's my phone. Excuse me. 1483 01:08:31,232 --> 01:08:32,942 Yeah? 1484 01:08:33,067 --> 01:08:34,861 He's here? 1485 01:08:34,986 --> 01:08:36,821 Okay. Thanks. 1486 01:08:36,946 --> 01:08:39,365 The, uh, axeman is here. 1487 01:08:39,490 --> 01:08:42,118 - I'll take care of it. - Alright. 1488 01:08:42,243 --> 01:08:44,287 Molly? 1489 01:08:44,412 --> 01:08:46,581 Anybody seen Molly? 1490 01:08:46,706 --> 01:08:50,543 ♪ And he is awful happy that I'm here ♪ 1491 01:08:50,668 --> 01:08:53,880 ♪ And that we have new Munich beer ♪ 1492 01:08:54,005 --> 01:08:55,632 ♪ Have a glass and tell a joke ♪ 1493 01:08:55,757 --> 01:08:57,508 ♪ About a guy who danced the polka ♪ 1494 01:08:57,634 --> 01:09:00,136 ♪ And remember that the party has to end ♪ 1495 01:09:00,261 --> 01:09:01,638 ♪ My friend ♪ 1496 01:09:01,763 --> 01:09:03,473 ♪ Adieu adieu kind friends ♪ 1497 01:09:03,598 --> 01:09:05,308 ♪ Adieu ♪ ♪ Adieu adieu ♪ 1498 01:09:05,433 --> 01:09:08,311 ♪ But first let's have another brew.. ♪ 1499 01:09:08,436 --> 01:09:10,271 - 'Mr. Crust?' - Cruett! 1500 01:09:10,396 --> 01:09:11,856 I don't believe we've met. 1501 01:09:11,981 --> 01:09:15,276 Guy Noir, vice-president, security 1502 01:09:15,401 --> 01:09:16,903 and, uh, data acquisition. 1503 01:09:17,028 --> 01:09:19,155 Good for you. Show almost over? 1504 01:09:19,280 --> 01:09:21,532 - Almost. Yes. - Just in time then. 1505 01:09:21,658 --> 01:09:22,909 The show's been goin' on how long? 1506 01:09:23,034 --> 01:09:25,787 - Somebody said 50 years. - N-nearly. 1507 01:09:25,912 --> 01:09:28,414 - Uh, 30.. Something. - Weird. 1508 01:09:28,539 --> 01:09:31,167 It's like a time warp. I feel like an anthropologist 1509 01:09:31,292 --> 01:09:32,794 'finding some primitive tribe' 1510 01:09:32,919 --> 01:09:34,420 'squatting around a fire in the forest' 1511 01:09:34,545 --> 01:09:36,798 telling stories, and sparks flying up in the air. 1512 01:09:36,923 --> 01:09:38,383 Yeah. Heh-heh. 1513 01:09:38,508 --> 01:09:41,386 Well, we've got the, uh, luxury box for you, right here. 1514 01:09:43,429 --> 01:09:44,347 Right this way. 1515 01:09:47,642 --> 01:09:49,519 Who's that guy? 1516 01:09:49,644 --> 01:09:52,814 Oh, that's the guy, uh, used to come see the shows here. 1517 01:09:52,939 --> 01:09:55,274 Um, local boy. He's a writer. 1518 01:09:55,400 --> 01:09:56,776 Uh, he wrote novels. 1519 01:09:56,901 --> 01:09:58,403 Uh, F. Scott Fitzgerald. 1520 01:09:58,528 --> 01:09:59,737 'Grew up right here in St. Paul.' 1521 01:09:59,862 --> 01:10:01,781 What kind of novels? 1522 01:10:01,906 --> 01:10:04,242 - Uh, romantic ones. Mostly. - Oh. 1523 01:10:04,367 --> 01:10:06,160 I don't read romances. No time. 1524 01:10:06,285 --> 01:10:08,913 'Hmm. We usually have, uh, clients in here.' 1525 01:10:09,038 --> 01:10:10,915 You know, five or six of them at a time, sponsor.. 1526 01:10:11,040 --> 01:10:13,376 That's some nice plaster work around the proscenium there. 1527 01:10:13,501 --> 01:10:14,711 We'll have to remember to save a piece of that. 1528 01:10:14,836 --> 01:10:17,088 I wish we were taping this show. 1529 01:10:17,213 --> 01:10:19,173 - This is alive show. - 'Videotape.' 1530 01:10:19,298 --> 01:10:21,968 Historical purposes. Send it to a museum. 1531 01:10:22,093 --> 01:10:23,594 Well, this is just great. This is all I need. 1532 01:10:23,720 --> 01:10:26,097 This is the first time somebody died at the show. 1533 01:10:26,222 --> 01:10:27,598 - I mean, the first time! - Al, we're all gettin'.. 1534 01:10:27,724 --> 01:10:30,560 - He's dead? - The show's not over, is it? 1535 01:10:30,685 --> 01:10:33,271 We've got a dead man downstairs. We've gotta do something. 1536 01:10:33,396 --> 01:10:34,814 'Just be glad-glad you don't have--' 1537 01:10:34,939 --> 01:10:37,400 - 'When did this happen?' - Who's that, Chuck? 1538 01:10:37,525 --> 01:10:39,235 - 'Yes.' - Where's Evelyn? 1539 01:10:39,360 --> 01:10:41,195 Evelyn was down there, he was waitin' for Evelyn 1540 01:10:41,320 --> 01:10:42,947 when he passed away. 1541 01:10:43,072 --> 01:10:44,532 He died with a heart full of hope. 1542 01:10:44,657 --> 01:10:47,410 Yeah, that's not a bad way to go when you think about it. 1543 01:10:47,535 --> 01:10:49,829 Sittin' there in the dark, in your underwear, you know? 1544 01:10:49,954 --> 01:10:51,456 Waitin' for your lover to come. 1545 01:10:51,581 --> 01:10:53,583 He was in his underwear? 1546 01:10:53,708 --> 01:10:55,334 'Donna told me he was wearin' boxer shorts' 1547 01:10:55,460 --> 01:10:56,711 'with big raspberries on 'em' 1548 01:10:56,836 --> 01:10:58,379 'and a great big bottle of massage oil' 1549 01:10:58,504 --> 01:10:59,839 'and a bayberry candle goin" 1550 01:10:59,964 --> 01:11:02,216 and "Mills Brothers'" greatest hits. 1551 01:11:02,341 --> 01:11:05,344 He was all set. He was loaded for Evelyn. 1552 01:11:05,470 --> 01:11:07,180 Well, uh, can I offer you somethin' to drink? 1553 01:11:07,305 --> 01:11:08,723 Water. No ice. No lemon. 1554 01:11:10,808 --> 01:11:11,893 Water. 1555 01:11:12,018 --> 01:11:13,978 No ice. No lemon. Straight up. Neat. 1556 01:11:16,189 --> 01:11:19,275 Radio sound effects learned from a master. 1557 01:11:19,400 --> 01:11:20,860 What can I tell you about the show? 1558 01:11:20,985 --> 01:11:23,821 I know everything I need to know about the show. 1559 01:11:23,946 --> 01:11:25,740 - You're sure about that? - Yes. 1560 01:11:25,865 --> 01:11:27,283 You're not going to change your mind? 1561 01:11:27,408 --> 01:11:28,451 No. 1562 01:11:28,576 --> 01:11:30,328 Hmm. 1563 01:11:30,453 --> 01:11:33,080 'Lot of good people up there. On the stage.' 1564 01:11:33,206 --> 01:11:35,208 'Lot of 'em.' 1565 01:11:35,333 --> 01:11:37,460 'I mean, I'm a man of the world like yourself' 1566 01:11:37,585 --> 01:11:39,462 but, uh, these folks put their lives into this. 1567 01:11:39,587 --> 01:11:41,297 'Now they can put their lives into something else.' 1568 01:11:41,422 --> 01:11:42,965 There's always something to put your life into, isn't there? 1569 01:11:43,090 --> 01:11:44,675 It's like the scripture tells us 1570 01:11:44,801 --> 01:11:47,512 you have to lose your life before you can find it. 1571 01:11:49,096 --> 01:11:51,140 Scripture is guiding you here? 1572 01:11:51,265 --> 01:11:53,142 The company is owned by people of faith, Mr. Noir. 1573 01:11:55,394 --> 01:11:57,897 Before I came to the Lord, I played in a band myself. 1574 01:11:59,565 --> 01:12:00,566 "The Dukes of Rhythm." 1575 01:12:01,734 --> 01:12:02,985 'We were terrible.' 1576 01:12:03,110 --> 01:12:04,403 'Then, thank God, we were saved' 1577 01:12:04,529 --> 01:12:06,405 by the simple realization of the truth. 1578 01:12:06,531 --> 01:12:09,826 We were no good. We got fired. It was a blessing. 1579 01:12:09,951 --> 01:12:12,119 - You wanna say something? - Say what? No, I don't.. 1580 01:12:12,245 --> 01:12:13,663 'You know, you should say something' 1581 01:12:13,788 --> 01:12:15,665 "cause he was on the show all these years.' 1582 01:12:15,790 --> 01:12:17,959 - Absolutely. - I don't do eulogies. 1583 01:12:18,084 --> 01:12:19,502 - I don't. - Is there a reason for that? 1584 01:12:19,627 --> 01:12:20,837 Or you just don't care for people? 1585 01:12:20,962 --> 01:12:22,755 I'm at an age where if I started to do them 1586 01:12:22,880 --> 01:12:24,298 I'd do nothing but eulogies. 1587 01:12:24,423 --> 01:12:26,300 How about just a moment of silence? 1588 01:12:26,425 --> 01:12:29,262 Silence on the radio? I don't know how that works. 1589 01:12:29,387 --> 01:12:30,805 'Okay, we've got about 30 seconds. 30..' 1590 01:12:30,930 --> 01:12:33,933 Hold on a second, you're saying if my mom died 1591 01:12:34,058 --> 01:12:35,017 you wouldn't do anything, you wouldn't say anything. 1592 01:12:35,142 --> 01:12:36,727 If I What? 1593 01:12:36,853 --> 01:12:38,896 You'd just ignore it you'd act like it never happened? 1594 01:12:39,021 --> 01:12:41,232 - How could you do that? - We don't look back in radio. 1595 01:12:41,357 --> 01:12:44,151 That's the beauty of it. Nobody gets old. Nobody dies. 1596 01:12:44,277 --> 01:12:46,946 - 'We just keep on going.' - What if you died? 1597 01:12:47,071 --> 01:12:48,364 I Will. 1598 01:12:48,489 --> 01:12:49,949 And you don't want people to remember you? 1599 01:12:50,074 --> 01:12:52,243 I don't want them to be told to remember me. 1600 01:12:53,411 --> 01:12:55,997 - Hmm? - You know what? 1601 01:12:56,122 --> 01:12:57,915 - Somebody died down there. - That's right. 1602 01:12:58,040 --> 01:12:59,584 Okay? And we're not even paying attention 1603 01:12:59,709 --> 01:13:01,002 and you're not even going to say anything? 1604 01:13:01,127 --> 01:13:02,628 We pay attention by doing our job. 1605 01:13:02,753 --> 01:13:03,880 - Come on. - 'Go, go, go. You're on.' 1606 01:13:04,005 --> 01:13:05,339 'You're on, you're on.' 1607 01:13:05,464 --> 01:13:07,091 I gotta get someone to take me home. 1608 01:13:07,216 --> 01:13:08,968 I'm not spending the night alone tonight. 1609 01:13:09,093 --> 01:13:12,805 - Don't, nobody even cares. - No, we do. We all care. 1610 01:13:12,930 --> 01:13:14,682 We care like hell. 1611 01:13:14,807 --> 01:13:16,434 'You're gonna want to have' a Whole freezer full 1612 01:13:16,559 --> 01:13:18,144 'of Prince of Pizzas.' 1613 01:13:18,269 --> 01:13:21,522 '"It's the frozen pizza that tastes homemade always. 1614 01:13:21,647 --> 01:13:26,736 "Made from real Minnesota cheese and sausage." 1615 01:13:26,861 --> 01:13:29,488 ♪ One Prince of Pizza slice ♪ 1616 01:13:29,614 --> 01:13:31,908 ♪ Puts me in paradise ♪ 1617 01:13:32,033 --> 01:13:34,493 ♪ Sausage and extra cheese ♪ 1618 01:13:34,619 --> 01:13:37,705 ♪ Onions and anchovies ♪ 1619 01:13:37,830 --> 01:13:39,624 That's fun.. That's funny. 1620 01:13:39,749 --> 01:13:41,834 Watchin' them through this glass it's like a zoo. 1621 01:13:45,504 --> 01:13:47,381 I'll be right back. 1622 01:13:47,506 --> 01:13:48,966 ♪ It's the best ♪ 1623 01:13:49,091 --> 01:13:50,468 ♪ It's the best ♪ 1624 01:13:50,593 --> 01:13:52,678 ♪ In the Midwest ♪ 1625 01:13:52,803 --> 01:13:56,057 ♪ Pizza pie pizza pie ♪ 1626 01:13:56,182 --> 01:13:59,894 ♪ Prince of Pizza is the best pie ♪♪ 1627 01:14:05,691 --> 01:14:08,194 Yes, Guy Noir here. Get me Molly. 1628 01:14:11,322 --> 01:14:12,823 Yeah? 1629 01:14:12,949 --> 01:14:14,492 Molly, listen, I need you to do something for me. 1630 01:14:14,617 --> 01:14:16,327 - It's very important. - What? 1631 01:14:16,452 --> 01:14:18,829 I need you come out here so I can talk to you face to face. 1632 01:14:18,955 --> 01:14:20,706 - Can you do that? - I'm right here. 1633 01:14:20,831 --> 01:14:22,541 Wha-b-d.. 1634 01:14:23,751 --> 01:14:26,712 - Who's this? - I don't know. 1635 01:14:26,837 --> 01:14:28,506 No, who-who's talking to me? 1636 01:14:28,631 --> 01:14:31,258 - I don't.. I-I am! - Shh! Hello? 1637 01:14:31,384 --> 01:14:33,427 - Hello? - Hello? 1638 01:14:35,554 --> 01:14:37,181 There's nobody there. 1639 01:14:37,306 --> 01:14:39,225 Okay. 1640 01:14:39,350 --> 01:14:40,559 I have to.. 1641 01:14:40,685 --> 01:14:41,602 ...ask you to do something for me. 1642 01:14:41,727 --> 01:14:42,812 It's very important. 1643 01:14:42,937 --> 01:14:45,147 - It's, uh.. - What? 1644 01:14:45,272 --> 01:14:47,233 I need a drink. 1645 01:14:47,358 --> 01:14:48,651 Uhh! 1646 01:14:48,776 --> 01:14:50,778 Oh, "yen. 1647 01:14:51,988 --> 01:14:53,239 You okay? 1648 01:14:55,700 --> 01:14:57,326 Yeah. 1649 01:14:57,451 --> 01:14:59,996 So how's it goin' in there with, uh, axeman? 1650 01:15:01,247 --> 01:15:02,456 This is very slippery. 1651 01:15:02,581 --> 01:15:04,125 How do they keep the drinks on there? 1652 01:15:04,250 --> 01:15:06,961 It's going very well. I mean, well, he's tough. 1653 01:15:07,086 --> 01:15:10,840 He's tough. But, uh, I think, uh.. 1654 01:15:10,965 --> 01:15:12,717 I think I have another solution. 1655 01:15:12,842 --> 01:15:15,428 - What? - Well, he used to be in a band. 1656 01:15:15,553 --> 01:15:17,013 Along time ago called the "Dukes of Rhythm" 1657 01:15:17,138 --> 01:15:18,681 and I think if we can round up the guys 1658 01:15:18,806 --> 01:15:22,268 who were in that band and get 'em all on the show.. 1659 01:15:22,393 --> 01:15:25,563 Sorry. Um, we can, um.. 1660 01:15:25,688 --> 01:15:28,065 We can maybe get him to change his mind. 1661 01:15:28,190 --> 01:15:30,067 Have a kind of reunion.. 1662 01:15:30,192 --> 01:15:33,362 You know, with all the, uh, the band members 1663 01:15:33,487 --> 01:15:35,448 right here on "The Prairie Home Companion." 1664 01:15:35,573 --> 01:15:37,700 - Here's to happy endings. - Happy endings! 1665 01:15:44,040 --> 01:15:46,751 - Oh, God, that's good. - Mother's milk. 1666 01:15:46,876 --> 01:15:47,793 What? 1667 01:15:47,918 --> 01:15:49,211 Sorry. 1668 01:15:49,336 --> 01:15:52,214 - Here's what I need you to do. - Hmm. 1669 01:15:52,339 --> 01:15:57,094 Take this note.. Uhh, to the woman... backstage. 1670 01:15:57,219 --> 01:15:59,138 - Give it to who? - The lady backstage. 1671 01:15:59,263 --> 01:16:00,890 The blonde lady with a white trench coat. 1672 01:16:01,015 --> 01:16:02,016 Blonde lady with a white trench coat? 1673 01:16:02,141 --> 01:16:03,559 Yes. She's beautiful, blonde. 1674 01:16:06,437 --> 01:16:09,565 - You can't miss her. - "Angel, man in the.." 1675 01:16:09,690 --> 01:16:10,608 Shh! 1676 01:16:12,193 --> 01:16:14,487 - Boat? - Booth. 1677 01:16:14,612 --> 01:16:17,281 "Man in the booth.. 1678 01:16:17,406 --> 01:16:21,160 ...make him go away." 1679 01:16:21,285 --> 01:16:24,789 Give this to her, and then destroy that. 1680 01:16:26,540 --> 01:16:28,042 It's time to bring out an old favorite 1681 01:16:28,167 --> 01:16:29,877 here on the Prairie Home Companion 1682 01:16:30,002 --> 01:16:32,463 and that's two fine women who've been singing together 1683 01:16:32,588 --> 01:16:34,131 since they were little girls 1684 01:16:34,256 --> 01:16:36,509 growing up in Oshkosh, Wisconsin. 1685 01:16:36,634 --> 01:16:38,928 They've kept alive all those old songs that go way back. 1686 01:16:39,053 --> 01:16:40,805 Please welcome here "The Johnson Girls" 1687 01:16:40,930 --> 01:16:42,598 Rhonda and Yolanda. 1688 01:16:45,893 --> 01:16:46,811 Thank you. 1689 01:16:47,853 --> 01:16:50,397 Thank you very much. 1690 01:16:50,523 --> 01:16:54,026 We're gonna do a song now that we wrote for our mama 1691 01:16:54,151 --> 01:16:55,820 who brought us up 1692 01:16:55,945 --> 01:16:58,572 with no, uh, luxuries. 1693 01:16:58,697 --> 01:17:00,825 No vacation trips. No vacations even. 1694 01:17:02,576 --> 01:17:07,123 But we did have one luxury, and that was music. You know? 1695 01:17:07,248 --> 01:17:08,666 Mama loved us to sing. 1696 01:17:08,791 --> 01:17:12,962 Yeah, no matter how tired she was, she loved.. 1697 01:17:13,087 --> 01:17:15,005 ...hearin' us kids sing. 1698 01:17:17,424 --> 01:17:19,301 'So this is for you, mama.' 1699 01:17:22,096 --> 01:17:24,223 ♪ Good-bye to my mama ♪ 1700 01:17:24,348 --> 01:17:26,350 ♪ My uncles and aunts ♪ 1701 01:17:26,475 --> 01:17:28,561 ♪ One after another ♪ 1702 01:17:28,686 --> 01:17:32,314 ♪ They went to lie down ♪ 1703 01:17:32,439 --> 01:17:34,233 ♪ In the green pastures ♪ 1704 01:17:34,358 --> 01:17:36,569 ♪ Beside the still waters ♪ 1705 01:17:36,694 --> 01:17:43,117 ♪ And made no sound ♪ 1706 01:17:43,242 --> 01:17:45,369 ♪ Their arms that had held me ♪ 1707 01:17:45,494 --> 01:17:47,621 ♪ For so many years ♪ 1708 01:17:47,746 --> 01:17:49,790 ♪ Their beautiful voices ♪ 1709 01:17:49,915 --> 01:17:52,001 ♪ No longer I hear ♪ 1710 01:17:52,126 --> 01:17:54,211 ♪ They're in Jesus' arms ♪ 1711 01:17:54,336 --> 01:17:56,463 ♪ And he's talkin' to them ♪ 1712 01:17:56,589 --> 01:18:01,969 ♪ In the rapturous new Jerusalem ♪ 1713 01:18:02,094 --> 01:18:04,346 ♪ And I know they're at peace ♪ 1714 01:18:04,471 --> 01:18:06,724 ♪ In a land of delight ♪ 1715 01:18:06,849 --> 01:18:08,142 ♪ But I miss ♪ 1716 01:18:08,267 --> 01:18:13,063 ♪ My mama ♪ 1717 01:18:13,189 --> 01:18:18,027 ♪ Tonight. ♪ 1718 01:18:18,152 --> 01:18:22,907 ♪ Goodbye Eleanor and Aunt Franny and Jo.. ♪ 1719 01:18:23,032 --> 01:18:27,077 Oh, Chuck, they're playin' this for you. 1720 01:18:27,203 --> 01:18:30,581 You should be out there performin' this with them. 1721 01:18:30,706 --> 01:18:32,750 ♪ ...who went to lie down ♪ 1722 01:18:32,875 --> 01:18:38,756 ♪ And now is gone ♪ 1723 01:18:40,966 --> 01:18:43,802 ♪ Whose hands are these ♪ 1724 01:18:43,928 --> 01:18:48,307 ♪ All rough and hard? ♪ 1725 01:18:48,432 --> 01:18:51,185 ♪ Nails all torn ♪ 1726 01:18:51,310 --> 01:18:55,898 ♪ From toil and care ♪ 1727 01:18:56,023 --> 01:18:58,609 ♪ Who cleaned the house ♪ 1728 01:18:58,734 --> 01:19:03,364 ♪ And kept the yard ♪ 1729 01:19:03,489 --> 01:19:06,033 ♪ Touched my cheek ♪ 1730 01:19:06,158 --> 01:19:10,829 ♪ And stroked my hair? ♪ 1731 01:19:10,955 --> 01:19:14,124 ♪ Thank you mama ♪ 1732 01:19:14,250 --> 01:19:18,212 ♪ The lord give you peace ♪ 1733 01:19:18,337 --> 01:19:21,090 ♪ Bless your voice ♪ 1734 01:19:21,215 --> 01:19:25,636 ♪ And the songs you've sung ♪ 1735 01:19:25,761 --> 01:19:28,430 ♪ Blessed your arms ♪ 1736 01:19:28,555 --> 01:19:32,893 ♪ And your hands and your knees ♪ 1737 01:19:33,018 --> 01:19:36,480 ♪ How you loved us ♪ 1738 01:19:36,605 --> 01:19:40,609 ♪ When we were young ♪ 1739 01:19:40,734 --> 01:19:44,571 ♪ The lord's my shepherd ♪ 1740 01:19:44,697 --> 01:19:47,866 ♪ I'll not want ♪ 1741 01:19:47,992 --> 01:19:51,203 ♪ I have my mama ♪ 1742 01:19:51,328 --> 01:19:55,374 ♪ My uncles and aunts ♪ 1743 01:19:55,499 --> 01:19:58,377 ♪ Waters so still ♪ 1744 01:19:58,502 --> 01:20:03,007 ♪ And pastures so green ♪ 1745 01:20:03,132 --> 01:20:06,552 ♪ Goodness and mercy ♪ 1746 01:20:06,677 --> 01:20:10,723 ♪ Following me ♪ 1747 01:20:10,848 --> 01:20:14,560 ♪ Goodness and mercy ♪ 1748 01:20:14,685 --> 01:20:20,399 ♪ Following me ♪♪ 1749 01:20:22,067 --> 01:20:24,528 Okay, okay, you're on. Go get 'em. 1750 01:20:27,114 --> 01:20:28,240 ' "The Johnson Girls," thank you.' 1751 01:20:28,365 --> 01:20:30,200 'Brought to you by Powder Milk biscuits' 1752 01:20:30,326 --> 01:20:31,577 'in the big blue box.' 1753 01:20:31,702 --> 01:20:33,203 Let's bring 'em in right now 1754 01:20:33,329 --> 01:20:35,414 in off that long, dusty, lonesome trail 1755 01:20:35,539 --> 01:20:38,167 the old trail hands themselves 1756 01:20:38,292 --> 01:20:40,127 'Dusty and Lefty.' 1757 01:20:43,756 --> 01:20:44,965 Thank you very much. 1758 01:20:45,090 --> 01:20:46,759 Lefty and I are very proud of this. 1759 01:20:46,884 --> 01:20:48,886 It's a brand new number. 1760 01:20:49,011 --> 01:20:51,930 And, uh, we'd like to send it out 1761 01:20:52,056 --> 01:20:53,974 to our friends there in, uh 1762 01:20:54,099 --> 01:20:56,435 Maple Plain and, and Glenwood 1763 01:20:56,560 --> 01:20:59,104 and, uh, Renville and of course 1764 01:20:59,229 --> 01:21:01,231 our good friends up there on the range. 1765 01:21:01,357 --> 01:21:02,399 This is for you. 1766 01:21:02,524 --> 01:21:03,776 'One, two, three.' 1767 01:21:08,530 --> 01:21:09,865 Oh, God! 1768 01:21:11,241 --> 01:21:13,702 I'm gonna kill those guys. 1769 01:21:13,827 --> 01:21:16,246 ♪ The blind man's seein' eye dog ♪ 1770 01:21:16,372 --> 01:21:17,831 ♪ Pissed on the blind man's shoe.. ♪ 1771 01:21:17,956 --> 01:21:19,666 Oh, no. 1772 01:21:19,792 --> 01:21:22,252 ♪ Here Rover here's a piece of beef for you.. ♪ 1773 01:21:24,463 --> 01:21:25,547 Hey, what are you doin' back there? 1774 01:21:25,672 --> 01:21:27,174 ♪ You can't just let that pass ♪ 1775 01:21:27,299 --> 01:21:28,467 ♪ The blind man said ♪ 1776 01:21:28,592 --> 01:21:29,885 ♪ I gotta find his mouth ♪ 1777 01:21:30,010 --> 01:21:32,012 ♪ So I can kick him in the ass.. ♪ 1778 01:21:32,137 --> 01:21:34,807 Oh, great. Now what's the difference? 1779 01:21:34,932 --> 01:21:36,600 Piss, ass. 1780 01:21:36,725 --> 01:21:38,018 Show's on the way out, anyway. 1781 01:21:38,143 --> 01:21:39,436 ♪ Ooowhee ♪ 1782 01:21:39,561 --> 01:21:40,896 ♪ Bad jokes for me ♪ 1783 01:21:43,315 --> 01:21:45,109 - You got one, Dusty? - I got one, Lefty. 1784 01:21:45,234 --> 01:21:46,193 Let's hear it. 1785 01:21:46,318 --> 01:21:48,195 ♪ When God created woman ♪ 1786 01:21:48,320 --> 01:21:50,739 ♪ He gave her not two breasts but three ♪ 1787 01:21:50,864 --> 01:21:53,242 ♪ When the middle one got in the way ♪ 1788 01:21:53,367 --> 01:21:55,411 ♪ God performed surgery ♪ 1789 01:21:55,536 --> 01:21:57,704 ♪ Woman stood before God ♪ 1790 01:21:57,830 --> 01:21:59,915 ♪ With the middle breast in hand ♪ 1791 01:22:00,040 --> 01:22:01,542 ♪ Said What do we do ♪ 1792 01:22:01,667 --> 01:22:02,668 ♪ With the useless boob? ♪ 1793 01:22:02,793 --> 01:22:04,920 ♪ And God created man ♪ 1794 01:22:05,045 --> 01:22:07,131 ♪ Bad jokes lord I love 'em.. ♪ 1795 01:22:07,256 --> 01:22:08,590 Oh, great, boobs. 1796 01:22:08,715 --> 01:22:10,008 Why not? 1797 01:22:10,134 --> 01:22:12,636 Tits, ass, bring it on. The more the merrier. 1798 01:22:12,761 --> 01:22:14,138 What about boobs? 1799 01:22:14,263 --> 01:22:16,056 They're singin' a song about boobs and poop. 1800 01:22:16,181 --> 01:22:17,850 And who knows what? Hey, why not? 1801 01:22:17,975 --> 01:22:19,726 Let's just wreck the whole show. 1802 01:22:19,852 --> 01:22:21,812 I guess.. Let's-let's have a drink. 1803 01:22:21,937 --> 01:22:23,355 Let's get snookered. What do you say? 1804 01:22:23,480 --> 01:22:25,441 ♪ When a beautiful young naked woman ♪ 1805 01:22:25,566 --> 01:22:27,985 ♪ Stood up in front of the group ♪ 1806 01:22:28,110 --> 01:22:30,112 ♪ She offered gramps some super sex ♪ 1807 01:22:30,237 --> 01:22:32,614 ♪ And he said I'll take the soup ♪ 1808 01:22:32,739 --> 01:22:35,117 ♪ Bad jokes Lord I love 'em ♪ 1809 01:22:35,242 --> 01:22:37,244 ♪ Bad jokes can't get enough of 'em.. ♪ 1810 01:22:37,369 --> 01:22:40,080 Oh, kid. It's over, kid. 1811 01:22:40,205 --> 01:22:41,415 They're pullin' the plug. 1812 01:22:43,667 --> 01:22:46,670 - 'You ready for another one?' - 'Yeah, lay it on me.' 1813 01:22:46,795 --> 01:22:48,714 ♪ Ole went to the neighborhood dance ♪ 1814 01:22:48,839 --> 01:22:50,799 ♪ And he won the big door prize ♪ 1815 01:22:50,924 --> 01:22:53,135 ♪ It was a toilet brush and he took it home ♪ 1816 01:22:53,260 --> 01:22:55,429 ♪ And the next week one of the guys ♪ 1817 01:22:55,554 --> 01:22:57,848 ♪ Said Ole how's that toilet brush? ♪ 1818 01:22:57,973 --> 01:23:00,225 ♪ The one you won from the neighbors? ♪ 1819 01:23:00,350 --> 01:23:02,186 ♪ Ole said oh it works pretty good ♪ 1820 01:23:02,311 --> 01:23:04,730 ♪ But I prefer toilet paper ♪ 1821 01:23:04,855 --> 01:23:07,024 ♪ Bad jokes lord I love 'em ♪ 1822 01:23:07,149 --> 01:23:09,276 ♪ Bad jokes can't get enough of 'em ♪ 1823 01:23:09,401 --> 01:23:11,528 ♪ Ooowhee ♪ 1824 01:23:11,653 --> 01:23:13,780 ♪ Bad jokes for me ♪ 1825 01:23:13,906 --> 01:23:15,782 ♪ The farmer had a champion bull ♪ 1826 01:23:15,908 --> 01:23:18,118 ♪ Who bred 200 times a year ♪ 1827 01:23:18,243 --> 01:23:20,579 ♪ The farmer's wife said 200 times? ♪ 1828 01:23:20,704 --> 01:23:22,706 ♪ Isn't that wonderful dear? ♪ 1829 01:23:22,831 --> 01:23:25,000 ♪ Maybe you ought to watch him ♪ 1830 01:23:25,125 --> 01:23:27,377 ♪ Maybe he'll show you how ♪ 1831 01:23:27,503 --> 01:23:29,379 ♪ The farmer said he's a heck of a bull ♪ 1832 01:23:29,505 --> 01:23:31,048 ♪ But it wasn't all with the same cow ♪ 1833 01:23:31,173 --> 01:23:34,092 ♪ Come on now bad jokes lord I love 'em ♪ 1834 01:23:34,218 --> 01:23:36,345 ♪ Bad jokes can't get enough of 'em ♪ 1835 01:23:36,470 --> 01:23:38,764 ♪ Ooowhee ♪ 1836 01:23:38,889 --> 01:23:40,724 ♪ Bad jokes for me.. ♪ 1837 01:23:40,849 --> 01:23:43,268 - Let's see. I've got.. - 'You got another one, Dusty? 1838 01:23:43,393 --> 01:23:45,479 - One, four, three.. - 'Actually I do.' 1839 01:23:45,604 --> 01:23:48,524 Did you hear about the Viagra shipment that got stolen? 1840 01:23:48,649 --> 01:23:51,026 - No, who they think did it? - Well, they don't know. 1841 01:23:51,151 --> 01:23:53,320 But they're on the lookout for hardened criminals. 1842 01:23:54,738 --> 01:23:56,073 Get Garrison out here. 1843 01:23:56,198 --> 01:23:57,699 They're wrappin' this up. 1844 01:23:57,824 --> 01:24:00,160 - You got another one? - I got another one, Lefty. 1845 01:24:02,037 --> 01:24:05,582 Sven said to his friend, boy, I think my wife died. 1846 01:24:05,707 --> 01:24:07,793 His friend said, well, What do you mean, you think? 1847 01:24:07,918 --> 01:24:10,546 Well, the sex is still the same 1848 01:24:10,671 --> 01:24:12,256 but the dishes are stackin' up. 1849 01:24:16,510 --> 01:24:19,596 - Hey, Dusty. - Yeah, Lefty? 1850 01:24:19,721 --> 01:24:22,140 Did you know that diarrhea was hereditary? 1851 01:24:23,767 --> 01:24:24,893 No, I didn't. 1852 01:24:25,018 --> 01:24:26,728 Yeah, it runs in your jeans. 1853 01:24:31,024 --> 01:24:34,945 - Hey, uh, heh, Lefty? - Yeah? Go ahead. 1854 01:24:35,070 --> 01:24:39,283 - Why do they call it PMS? - PMS? Why, I don't know. Why? 1855 01:24:39,408 --> 01:24:41,743 'Cause mad cow was already taken. 1856 01:24:43,161 --> 01:24:44,621 Alright, that's enough. 1857 01:24:47,749 --> 01:24:50,127 - Hey, Dusty. - Yeah, Lefty? 1858 01:24:50,252 --> 01:24:54,339 What do you get when you cross holy water with castor oil? 1859 01:24:54,464 --> 01:24:56,675 I don't know, Lefty. What do you get? 1860 01:24:56,800 --> 01:24:58,468 A religious movement. 1861 01:25:01,805 --> 01:25:03,890 Hey, uh.. 1862 01:25:04,016 --> 01:25:06,268 Hey, Lefty, what did the elephant say to the naked man? 1863 01:25:06,393 --> 01:25:07,894 What'd he say? 1864 01:25:08,020 --> 01:25:10,105 It's cute, but can you really breathe through that thing? 1865 01:25:11,773 --> 01:25:14,651 ♪ Come on now bad jokes lord I love 'em ♪ 1866 01:25:14,776 --> 01:25:16,987 ♪ Bad jokes can't get enough of 'em ♪ 1867 01:25:17,112 --> 01:25:19,114 ♪ Ooowhee ♪ 1868 01:25:19,239 --> 01:25:21,533 ♪ Bad jokes for me ♪ 1869 01:25:21,658 --> 01:25:23,785 ♪ Bad jokes man I love 'em ♪ 1870 01:25:23,910 --> 01:25:25,996 ♪ Bad jokes can't get enough of 'em ♪ 1871 01:25:26,121 --> 01:25:28,373 ♪ Ooowhee ♪ 1872 01:25:28,498 --> 01:25:30,208 ♪ Bad.. ♪ 1873 01:25:30,334 --> 01:25:31,251 Whoo! 1874 01:25:31,376 --> 01:25:35,255 ♪ Jokes for me ♪♪ 1875 01:25:38,675 --> 01:25:39,635 Hey! 1876 01:25:41,637 --> 01:25:42,888 - Thank you! - Whoo-hoo! 1877 01:25:47,976 --> 01:25:49,519 We hope you've enjoyed our show tonight. 1878 01:25:49,645 --> 01:25:51,647 We certainly have enjoyed having you with us. 1879 01:25:51,772 --> 01:25:53,482 Great God in heaven. Holy shit. 1880 01:25:53,607 --> 01:25:55,359 We've got six minutes left! How did that happen? 1881 01:25:55,484 --> 01:25:56,777 Look, have you got anything for six minutes? 1882 01:25:56,902 --> 01:25:58,236 Have you rehearsed anything? Anything? 1883 01:25:58,362 --> 01:25:59,655 - Listen to me. Listen to me. - Anything? 1884 01:25:59,780 --> 01:26:01,615 Darlin', remember I said to you 1885 01:26:01,740 --> 01:26:03,367 "One door closes, another one opens?" 1886 01:26:03,492 --> 01:26:06,703 You go downstairs. Get your music and come up and sing. 1887 01:26:06,828 --> 01:26:08,622 - Now? - Lola, go, go, go. 1888 01:26:08,747 --> 01:26:11,208 - You can do it. - He said, go! Go! Go! 1889 01:26:11,333 --> 01:26:12,793 'Before he gets done.' 1890 01:26:12,918 --> 01:26:15,170 ...shy persons the strength to get up 1891 01:26:15,295 --> 01:26:17,172 and do what needs to be done. 1892 01:27:13,937 --> 01:27:15,439 So, we'll look forward to seeing you 1893 01:27:15,564 --> 01:27:17,315 back here at the Fitzgerald Theater 1894 01:27:17,441 --> 01:27:18,692 next week at this same time. 1895 01:27:18,817 --> 01:27:20,110 Brought to you once again by your friends 1896 01:27:20,235 --> 01:27:21,486 at Powder Milk biscuits. 1897 01:27:21,611 --> 01:27:23,280 Six minutes. Lola's gonna sing a song. 1898 01:27:23,405 --> 01:27:25,490 Your barn doors are open. 1899 01:27:25,615 --> 01:27:28,201 But first, we're going to bring a young woman on 1900 01:27:28,326 --> 01:27:31,246 to make her debut on our show. 1901 01:27:31,371 --> 01:27:34,624 Let's bring out this young and very talented 1902 01:27:34,750 --> 01:27:38,128 young woman who knows all those good old songs.. 1903 01:27:38,253 --> 01:27:40,422 To make her very first performance 1904 01:27:40,547 --> 01:27:42,591 right here on our radio show. 1905 01:27:42,716 --> 01:27:45,051 Please welcome now the beautiful 1906 01:27:45,177 --> 01:27:48,013 young Ms. Lola Johnson. 1907 01:27:48,138 --> 01:27:49,306 - Lola Johnson. - Whatever. 1908 01:27:49,431 --> 01:27:50,807 Ladies and gentlemen. 1909 01:28:00,817 --> 01:28:04,070 ♪ Frankie and Johnny were sweethearts ♪ 1910 01:28:04,196 --> 01:28:07,032 ♪ But he was doin' her wrong ♪ 1911 01:28:07,157 --> 01:28:10,535 ♪ He was doin' her wrong in a bad way ♪ 1912 01:28:10,660 --> 01:28:12,871 ♪ But she was good and strong ♪ 1913 01:28:12,996 --> 01:28:16,249 ♪ He was her man ♪ 1914 01:28:16,374 --> 01:28:18,460 ♪ But he was a jerk.. ♪ 1915 01:28:18,585 --> 01:28:19,711 Is that the way this song goes? 1916 01:28:19,836 --> 01:28:21,171 Um, sort of. 1917 01:28:21,296 --> 01:28:23,965 ♪ He was in a hotel with Nelly Bly ♪ 1918 01:28:24,090 --> 01:28:27,928 ♪ And the gun went rooty-toot-toot ♪ 1919 01:28:28,053 --> 01:28:30,972 ♪ She shot the bastard in the heart ♪ 1920 01:28:31,097 --> 01:28:33,308 ♪ And ruined his nice suit ♪ 1921 01:28:33,433 --> 01:28:36,478 ♪ He was her man ♪ 1922 01:28:36,603 --> 01:28:41,149 ♪ But he was no damn good ♪ 1923 01:28:41,274 --> 01:28:44,694 ♪ So they took him up to the graveyard ♪ 1924 01:28:44,820 --> 01:28:47,113 ♪ And stuck him in the dirt ♪ 1925 01:28:48,448 --> 01:28:51,284 ♪ Which was oh so very sad ♪ 1926 01:28:51,409 --> 01:28:53,662 ♪ And the waste of a nice clean shirt ♪ 1927 01:28:53,787 --> 01:28:57,082 ♪ He was her man ♪ 1928 01:28:57,207 --> 01:29:00,085 ♪ But he was doin' her wrong ♪ 1929 01:29:00,210 --> 01:29:01,127 What's the next line? 1930 01:29:01,253 --> 01:29:02,838 I've no idea. 1931 01:29:02,963 --> 01:29:04,798 I don't know. 1932 01:29:04,923 --> 01:29:08,260 ♪ He had no idea what happened ♪ 1933 01:29:08,385 --> 01:29:11,680 ♪ He was wavin' hello to God ♪ 1934 01:29:11,805 --> 01:29:15,058 ♪ He died from eating squirrels ♪ 1935 01:29:15,183 --> 01:29:17,602 ♪ And they laid him in the sod ♪ 1936 01:29:17,727 --> 01:29:21,022 ♪ He was her man ♪ 1937 01:29:21,147 --> 01:29:22,732 ♪ And he was doin' her wrong ♪ 1938 01:29:22,858 --> 01:29:23,775 Cool song. Wrap it up. 1939 01:29:25,569 --> 01:29:28,864 ♪ So that was Frankie and Johnny ♪ 1940 01:29:28,989 --> 01:29:32,325 ♪ And that's the end of my song ♪ 1941 01:29:32,450 --> 01:29:35,662 ♪ She put a hose in his tailpipe ♪ 1942 01:29:35,787 --> 01:29:37,998 ♪ 'Cause he had done her wrong ♪ 1943 01:29:38,123 --> 01:29:41,209 ♪ He was her man ♪ 1944 01:29:41,334 --> 01:29:47,382 ♪ And that's all she wrote ♪♪ 1945 01:29:48,550 --> 01:29:49,885 Thank you. 1946 01:29:53,013 --> 01:29:55,390 'There's a young woman who's goin' a long way.' 1947 01:29:55,515 --> 01:29:56,933 'We're goin', too. We're out of here.' 1948 01:29:57,058 --> 01:29:58,727 'And that's our show.' 1949 01:29:58,852 --> 01:30:00,687 Remember to keep your feet on the ground 1950 01:30:00,812 --> 01:30:03,690 your hopes up high, pray for rain 1951 01:30:03,815 --> 01:30:07,319 keep the humor dry, and eat those Powder Milk biscuits. 1952 01:30:07,444 --> 01:30:09,112 Thank you, everybody. 1953 01:30:09,237 --> 01:30:15,660 ♪ Come and sit by my side if you love me ♪ 1954 01:30:17,245 --> 01:30:23,168 ♪ Do not hasten to bid me adieu ♪ 1955 01:30:24,878 --> 01:30:31,301 ♪ But remember the Red River Valley ♪ 1956 01:30:33,053 --> 01:30:39,309 ♪ And the one who has loved you so true.. ♪ 1957 01:30:41,394 --> 01:30:43,897 - Show's almost over. - In more ways than one. 1958 01:30:44,022 --> 01:30:46,650 Nice perfume. Who are you with? The Show? 1959 01:30:46,775 --> 01:30:48,151 In a way. 1960 01:30:48,276 --> 01:30:50,528 I used to listen to this show every week. 1961 01:30:50,654 --> 01:30:53,698 Hmm. Well, it was great in its time, but the time's up. 1962 01:30:53,823 --> 01:30:56,952 - Life moves on. - It does. 1963 01:30:57,077 --> 01:30:58,870 So, be careful driving tonight. 1964 01:30:58,995 --> 01:31:00,997 Need a lift somewhere? 1965 01:31:01,122 --> 01:31:03,750 There's a shortcut to the airport. 1966 01:31:03,875 --> 01:31:07,087 A steep hill followed by a series of sharp curves 1967 01:31:07,212 --> 01:31:08,713 and a large oak tree. 1968 01:31:08,838 --> 01:31:10,674 What's your name? 1969 01:31:10,799 --> 01:31:12,425 - Asphodel. - Pretty. 1970 01:31:12,550 --> 01:31:13,593 I like your hair that way. 1971 01:31:13,718 --> 01:31:16,638 ♪ Come and sit by my side.. ♪ 1972 01:31:16,763 --> 01:31:18,765 When I used to listen to them, it was like they were all 1973 01:31:18,890 --> 01:31:20,183 my really good friends. 1974 01:31:20,308 --> 01:31:22,185 But something else happened, right? 1975 01:31:22,310 --> 01:31:23,228 Right. 1976 01:31:23,353 --> 01:31:25,146 Well.. 1977 01:31:25,271 --> 01:31:27,273 ...I'm that something else. 1978 01:31:29,943 --> 01:31:32,362 ♪ But remember ♪ 1979 01:31:32,487 --> 01:31:37,951 ♪ The Red River Valley.. ♪ 1980 01:31:48,128 --> 01:31:49,295 How long is the ride to the airport? 1981 01:31:49,421 --> 01:31:50,338 Twenty minutes. 1982 01:31:50,463 --> 01:31:53,550 She said there was a shortcut. 1983 01:31:53,675 --> 01:31:54,801 Yes, sir. I know it. 1984 01:32:28,543 --> 01:32:31,379 That was the last we saw of him. 1985 01:32:31,504 --> 01:32:33,381 The car hit a tree and blew up. 1986 01:32:35,800 --> 01:32:37,218 Goodbye, axeman. 1987 01:32:39,012 --> 01:32:40,764 But it didn't change a thing. 1988 01:32:43,433 --> 01:32:44,934 They sang "Sweet By-and-By" 1989 01:32:45,060 --> 01:32:46,561 and the audience filed out 1990 01:32:46,686 --> 01:32:49,814 and everybody packed up and left. 1991 01:32:51,900 --> 01:32:53,193 First thing in the morning, a truck 1992 01:32:53,318 --> 01:32:55,070 from the demolition company pulls up 1993 01:32:55,195 --> 01:32:58,114 and two guys started drilling for the explosives. 1994 01:33:00,325 --> 01:33:02,535 Just like ya learned in eighth grade English. 1995 01:33:04,412 --> 01:33:09,250 ♪ So gather ye rosebuds while ye may ♪ 1996 01:33:09,375 --> 01:33:13,254 ♪ Oh time is still a-flying ♪ 1997 01:33:15,423 --> 01:33:20,720 ♪ This same flower that smiles today ♪ 1998 01:33:21,721 --> 01:33:23,431 ♪ Tomorrow ♪ 1999 01:33:25,725 --> 01:33:27,060 ♪ Will be dying ♪ 2000 01:33:41,199 --> 01:33:42,867 Come on, pal. 2001 01:33:42,992 --> 01:33:44,285 Let me buy you a drink. 2002 01:34:08,059 --> 01:34:10,270 'Donna, ma-make it three eggs over.' 2003 01:34:10,395 --> 01:34:11,521 - No, listen to her. - 'I was tellin' you.' 2004 01:34:11,646 --> 01:34:12,981 What were you saying? 2005 01:34:13,106 --> 01:34:15,358 We are talkin' about doing a farewell tour. 2006 01:34:15,483 --> 01:34:16,776 - Yeah. - Oh, who? 2007 01:34:16,901 --> 01:34:19,279 Oh, the whole-whole gang from the old radio show. 2008 01:34:19,404 --> 01:34:20,572 But the show's been over for years. 2009 01:34:20,697 --> 01:34:21,990 - Yeah, I mean.. - So? 2010 01:34:22,115 --> 01:34:23,867 L-I always wanted to do a farewell tour. 2011 01:34:23,992 --> 01:34:25,493 I loved doin' that last show. 2012 01:34:25,618 --> 01:34:28,496 I just wanna do one last show and then another one 2013 01:34:28,621 --> 01:34:30,081 until I'm in a wheelchair. 2014 01:34:30,206 --> 01:34:32,000 I just wanna keep doin' 'em. 2015 01:34:32,125 --> 01:34:34,502 You know, as long as I can remember the words. 2016 01:34:34,627 --> 01:34:36,254 There's all sorts of towns we haven't played. 2017 01:34:36,379 --> 01:34:38,131 I mean, you've got Gooseberry Falls 2018 01:34:38,256 --> 01:34:39,883 you've got Lake Winnibigoshish. 2019 01:34:40,008 --> 01:34:42,635 Up in Lake Winnibigoshish a lot of people are waitin' to see us. 2020 01:34:42,760 --> 01:34:43,887 Well, you.. Don't count on me. 2021 01:34:44,012 --> 01:34:45,346 I got a lot of stuff happening. 2022 01:34:45,471 --> 01:34:47,223 - What? - Oh, things. 2023 01:34:47,348 --> 01:34:50,977 Things that are in the works. Different deals I'm workin' out. 2024 01:34:51,102 --> 01:34:53,354 I'll be in and out of town a lot. 2025 01:34:53,479 --> 01:34:55,064 Yeah, okay. So, what about you? 2026 01:34:55,190 --> 01:34:56,482 - Hey, I'm free. - Oh! 2027 01:34:56,608 --> 01:34:58,276 - Great! - Workin' at the parking ramp. 2028 01:34:58,401 --> 01:35:00,236 - The parkin' ramp? - Yes. It's a good job. 2029 01:35:00,361 --> 01:35:02,530 I like it. I read a lot of books. 2030 01:35:02,655 --> 01:35:04,199 - Make that four eggs. - Oh, boy. 2031 01:35:04,324 --> 01:35:06,242 - 'You're readin' a lot.' - Yeah. 2032 01:35:06,367 --> 01:35:08,620 - 'That's interesting.' - 'Oh, look at this!' 2033 01:35:08,745 --> 01:35:10,038 - 'Look who's here!' - 'Oh, my God!' 2034 01:35:10,163 --> 01:35:13,082 - I miss these guys. - Ha-ha-ha! 2035 01:35:13,208 --> 01:35:16,169 Look who just blew in from the old prairie. 2036 01:35:16,294 --> 01:35:18,796 'I thought you left town ahead of the sheriff?' 2037 01:35:18,922 --> 01:35:22,592 Well, the woman decided not to press charges. 2038 01:35:22,717 --> 01:35:24,469 Oh, yeah? What was the crime? Snorin'? 2039 01:35:27,347 --> 01:35:29,182 Love. 2040 01:35:29,307 --> 01:35:30,642 We just got back in town 2041 01:35:30,767 --> 01:35:32,518 from playin' the casinos in South Dakota. 2042 01:35:32,644 --> 01:35:33,895 'Yeah? Playin' what? Pinochle?' 2043 01:35:35,271 --> 01:35:36,773 Playin' our music. 2044 01:35:36,898 --> 01:35:38,650 Hey, we hear you might be gettin' a tour up. 2045 01:35:38,775 --> 01:35:40,193 - 'Oh, yeah.' - 'Yeah, we're all through ta..' 2046 01:35:40,318 --> 01:35:42,195 We've added some rope tricks to the repertoire. 2047 01:35:42,320 --> 01:35:44,113 - Flaming lariats. - 'Ah!' 2048 01:35:44,239 --> 01:35:45,949 It's called "Rings of fire." 2049 01:35:46,074 --> 01:35:47,909 Well, you know, we got a bus with bunk beds 2050 01:35:48,034 --> 01:35:50,828 'and we're going back to playing churches and schools.' 2051 01:35:50,954 --> 01:35:52,121 Look at this. Look at this. 2052 01:35:52,247 --> 01:35:53,289 She's only been workin' six months 2053 01:35:53,414 --> 01:35:54,874 and she's now the manager. 2054 01:35:54,999 --> 01:35:56,876 - No, I'll be there at 9:00. - What does she do? 2055 01:35:57,001 --> 01:35:59,879 Um, I have no idea. Something religious? 2056 01:36:00,004 --> 01:36:01,339 - Software. - Software. 2057 01:36:01,464 --> 01:36:02,757 Oh, it's big. It's movin' like monkeys. 2058 01:36:02,882 --> 01:36:05,468 - Yeah. Hi. 2059 01:36:05,593 --> 01:36:08,137 Alright, so, I looked at your pension stuff. 2060 01:36:08,263 --> 01:36:09,347 - Oh, good. - Yeah. 2061 01:36:09,472 --> 01:36:11,724 It's a horror show. 2062 01:36:11,849 --> 01:36:14,644 Have you ever heard of mutual funds? 2063 01:36:14,769 --> 01:36:16,813 You know, mom, honestly, you would've done a lot better 2064 01:36:16,938 --> 01:36:20,817 if you'd just stuck it in a shoe box and put it under your bed. 2065 01:36:20,942 --> 01:36:23,569 Well, that's why I wanted you to help me. 2066 01:36:23,695 --> 01:36:26,656 - So.. What is this? - Here. Sign there. 2067 01:36:26,781 --> 01:36:28,574 I have to get your assets working again. 2068 01:36:28,700 --> 01:36:30,451 - My what? - Your assets. 2069 01:36:30,576 --> 01:36:32,328 Oh. 2070 01:36:32,453 --> 01:36:34,455 Oh. Power of attorney. 2071 01:36:34,580 --> 01:36:37,667 Oh, and you spent $6000 on a bus? 2072 01:36:37,792 --> 01:36:39,127 - Yeah. - Why didn't you ask me first? 2073 01:36:39,252 --> 01:36:41,254 Well, I'm sorry. 2074 01:36:41,379 --> 01:36:42,297 So.. 2075 01:36:43,965 --> 01:36:45,675 Can I keep the bus or.. 2076 01:36:49,012 --> 01:36:50,930 We'll talk about it later. 2077 01:36:51,055 --> 01:36:52,307 - Hey, I love you. - That sounds like a no. 2078 01:36:52,432 --> 01:36:55,560 - I love you, too. - Bye, guys. 2079 01:36:55,685 --> 01:36:57,186 Donna? 2080 01:36:57,312 --> 01:36:59,063 - Bye! - Oh, hey. Bye. 2081 01:36:59,188 --> 01:37:00,690 'I thought that was a terrific eulogy you gave' 2082 01:37:00,815 --> 01:37:04,068 'for old man Soderberg at his memorial service.' 2083 01:37:04,193 --> 01:37:06,195 'Too bad the old coot couldn't have been there to hear it.' 2084 01:37:06,321 --> 01:37:09,532 'Yeah, and to have missed it by just a few days.' 2085 01:37:09,657 --> 01:37:10,575 - 'Hmm.' - 'Hmm.' 2086 01:37:26,049 --> 01:37:28,509 'I still love your laugh. Oh, yeah.' 2087 01:37:28,634 --> 01:37:31,012 - 'Hee-hee-hee!' - 'I got it.' 2088 01:37:31,137 --> 01:37:33,222 - 'You finally got it.' - 'Oh, I got it right..' 2089 01:37:37,477 --> 01:37:39,103 'Thank you.' 2090 01:37:39,228 --> 01:37:41,022 'That joke just gets better and better.' 2091 01:37:41,147 --> 01:37:42,732 - 'You know?' - 'Yep.' 2092 01:37:44,359 --> 01:37:46,944 - 'Yep.' - 'Boy, you should know.' 2093 01:37:47,070 --> 01:37:48,571 'Anybody want to Change their order?' 2094 01:37:51,199 --> 01:37:52,325 'Yeah, that coffee really helped.' 2095 01:38:33,991 --> 01:38:36,911 ♪ In the sweet ♪ In the sweet ♪ 2096 01:38:37,036 --> 01:38:39,080 ♪ Ohh by and by ♪ 2097 01:38:39,205 --> 01:38:40,748 ♪ By and by ♪ 2098 01:38:40,873 --> 01:38:42,500 ♪ We shall meet ♪ 2099 01:38:42,625 --> 01:38:47,505 ♪ On that beautiful shore ♪ 2100 01:38:47,630 --> 01:38:50,967 ♪ In the sweet ♪ 2101 01:38:51,092 --> 01:38:54,345 ♪ By and by ♪ 2102 01:38:54,470 --> 01:38:56,097 ♪ We shall meet ♪ 2103 01:38:56,222 --> 01:39:01,352 ♪ On that beautiful shore ♪ 2104 01:39:01,477 --> 01:39:03,354 ♪ There's a land ♪ 2105 01:39:03,479 --> 01:39:06,732 ♪ That is fairer than day ♪ 2106 01:39:06,858 --> 01:39:08,192 Come on, Lola. 2107 01:39:08,317 --> 01:39:14,991 ♪ And by faith we can see it afar ♪ 2108 01:39:15,116 --> 01:39:17,160 ♪ But the father ♪ 2109 01:39:17,285 --> 01:39:21,956 ♪ Awaits over there yeah ♪ 2110 01:39:22,081 --> 01:39:26,586 ♪ To prepare us a dwelling place there.. ♪ 2111 01:39:26,711 --> 01:39:28,921 Everybody! Come on! Sing it with us now! 2112 01:39:29,046 --> 01:39:32,258 ♪ In the sweet ♪ ♪ In the sweet ♪ 2113 01:39:32,383 --> 01:39:35,803 ♪ By and by ♪ ♪ By and by ♪ 2114 01:39:35,928 --> 01:39:37,388 ♪ We shall meet ♪ 2115 01:39:37,513 --> 01:39:42,643 ♪ On that beautiful shore ♪ 2116 01:39:42,768 --> 01:39:46,230 ♪ In the sweet ♪ 2117 01:39:46,355 --> 01:39:49,650 ♪ By and by ♪ 2118 01:39:49,775 --> 01:39:51,402 ♪ We shall meet ♪ 2119 01:39:51,527 --> 01:39:56,407 ♪ On that beautiful shore ♪ 2120 01:39:56,532 --> 01:39:59,619 ♪ In the sweet ♪ 2121 01:39:59,744 --> 01:40:03,122 ♪ By and by ♪ ♪ Ohh ♪ 2122 01:40:03,247 --> 01:40:05,041 ♪ We shall meet ♪ 2123 01:40:05,166 --> 01:40:09,045 ♪ On that beautiful shore ♪ 2124 01:40:09,170 --> 01:40:13,382 ♪ Yeah in the sweet ♪ 2125 01:40:13,508 --> 01:40:16,844 ♪ By and by ♪ 2126 01:40:16,969 --> 01:40:18,387 ♪ We shall meet ♪ 2127 01:40:18,513 --> 01:40:20,473 ♪ On that beautiful.. ♪ 2128 01:40:20,598 --> 01:40:23,559 Come on, girl! Take it home! 2129 01:40:23,684 --> 01:40:27,021 ♪ In the sweet ♪ 2130 01:40:27,146 --> 01:40:28,231 ♪ By and by ♪ 2131 01:40:28,356 --> 01:40:30,191 ♪ Ohh by and by ♪ 2132 01:40:30,316 --> 01:40:32,026 ♪ We shall meet ♪ 2133 01:40:32,151 --> 01:40:36,030 ♪ On that beautiful shore ♪ 2134 01:40:37,323 --> 01:40:40,618 ♪ In the sweet ♪ 2135 01:40:40,743 --> 01:40:43,538 ♪ By and by ♪ 2136 01:40:50,795 --> 01:40:54,048 ♪ In the sweet ♪ 2137 01:40:54,173 --> 01:40:57,552 ♪ By and by ♪ 2138 01:40:57,677 --> 01:40:59,387 ♪ We shall meet ♪ 2139 01:40:59,512 --> 01:41:03,516 ♪ On that beautiful shore ♪♪