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##
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##
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Hold on, I gotta come up!
4
00:02:58,478 --> 00:03:00,708
I've gotta take
the world's biggest fucking piss.
5
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We can't be late!
6
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We won't!
7
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Who's... who's holding?
8
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If you 're not, then nobody.
9
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We were kind of hoping you were.
10
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- Yeah. How are you not holding?
- Jesus Christ, Shanna.
11
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It is not my fucking job to supply y'all
with weed when we go out.
12
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Whoa, whoa,
whoa, whoa, little lady.
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You 're gettin' angry kind of quick,
don't you think?
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I was just teasin' you!
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I'm not angry.
It just would be nice
16
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if y'all didn't just count on me
all the fucking time
17
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and surprise me
every once in a while with pot.
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Okay, mean girl
in a high school movie.
19
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Are you through
having a tantrum?
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I'm not having a tantrum.
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Yes, you are. You 've been
in the car all of two seconds,
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and you 're already cursing at me.
23
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I am not cursing at you.
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You said "Jesus Christ, Shanna,"
25
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and then before
the sentence was over
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you threw a "fucking" in there
to emphasize your irritatedness.
27
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Come on, don't fight.
I'll pay for it when we get some.
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One, it is not about the money.
It is about the pain in the ass of scoring.
29
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And two, we're not really fighting.
30
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Arlene, you 've forgotten what
hanging out with Jungle Julia is like.
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That wasn't a fight.
32
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That was Julia
acting like a grumpy bitch
33
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and me calling her on it
and indulging her at the same time.
34
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That's how we tolerate each other
after all these years.
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Oh! Billboard!
36
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So, what's the plan, man?
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Margaritas and Mexican food at Guero's.
38
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Did you call Rafael
and tell him we're coming?
39
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- Of course.
- You 're so good.
40
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I know.
41
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Okay, is Christian Simonson
gonna be there?
42
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You bet your ass he is...
with Jesse Letterman.
43
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Christian Simonson,
the filmmaker, is in town.
44
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He's got a big thing for Julia.
45
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If he had a big thing for me,
he'd fucking call me,
46
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as opposed to disappearing
for six months,
47
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and he'd get his ass down here
more often than he does.
48
00:05:04,037 --> 00:05:06,767
And on my birthday
he'd give me a fucking phone call.
49
00:05:06,839 --> 00:05:08,033
Oh, billboard!
50
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Yeah, but you get
those legs of yours around him,
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and it's all over.
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Yeah, well, when I'm redecorating
his house in the hills that I am also living in,
53
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I'll let you know it worked.
54
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So, margaritas
and Mexican food at Guero's,
55
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touch base with Chris and Jesse,
tell them about later,
56
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and make damn sure they come.
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Those other guys'll be waiting for us
at the Texas Chili Parlor.
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Oh, shit. Speaking of which...
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what happened
with you and Nate last night?
60
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Well, you know, not much.
We just fucking met each other.
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If you don't bust their balls a little bit,
they're never gonna respect you.
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Okay, we're pretty clear
on what it is you didn 't do.
63
00:05:48,181 --> 00:05:50,376
How about enlightening us
on what it is you did do?
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Oh, nothing to write home about.
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We just made out on the couch
for about 20 minutes.
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Dressed, half-dressed, or naked?
67
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Dressed. I said we made out.
We didn't do "the thing."
68
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Oh, excuse me for living,
but what is "the thing"?
69
00:06:02,862 --> 00:06:04,693
You know, it's everything but.
70
00:06:04,764 --> 00:06:06,493
They call that "the thing"?
71
00:06:06,566 --> 00:06:08,124
I call it "the thing."
72
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Do guys like "the thing"?
73
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They like it better than "no thing."
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Okay, I wanna get back
to what it is you did do.
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So you 're making out
on the couch with Nate, right?
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Correct.
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Whose couch?
His or the one in your hotel room?
78
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What am I, stupid over here? Mine.
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00:06:23,049 --> 00:06:25,074
Were you making out
sitting up or lying down?
80
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We started sitting up,
we worked our way to lying down.
81
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Hmm. The plot thickens.
Who was on top?
82
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I was straddling him.
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What else?
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That was it. So we made out
for a little while on the couch...
85
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and I said, "Okay, I'm gonna go to bed now,
so it's time for you to leave."
86
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And then he starts to whine,
"Oh, right now?"
87
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And I said,
"Yup, right now. Let's go."
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And he says, "Wait, what about this?"
And I said no.
89
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He said, "What do you mean?
You don't know what I'm gonna say."
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I said, "I already know what you 're
gonna say, and the answer's no."
91
00:06:56,282 --> 00:06:57,977
He said, "Well, how can you say
you know what I'm gonna say?"
92
00:06:58,050 --> 00:07:00,575
And I said, "Because you 're gonna say,
'Let's just go to sleep together.
93
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'We don't gotta do nothing.
94
00:07:02,021 --> 00:07:04,080
'Just cuddle,
sleep next to each other,
95
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wake up in the morning together."'
96
00:07:06,092 --> 00:07:09,459
"No. You 're gonna leave...
but I'll see you tomorrow."
97
00:07:09,529 --> 00:07:10,791
Yeah, fuck Nate.
98
00:07:10,863 --> 00:07:11,887
I mean, he's cute and all,
99
00:07:11,964 --> 00:07:14,899
but Jesse Letterman
is gonna be all over her.
100
00:07:14,967 --> 00:07:18,300
Remember...
no hookin' up tonight.
101
00:07:18,371 --> 00:07:21,932
You can hang out with them,
you can make out with them,
102
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but no hookin' up with them,
103
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because we are driving
to Lake L.B.J. tonight,
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and my daddy's pretty clear
about one thing...
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He said, "I am lettin' you
and your girlfriends stay at my lake house,
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not you and a bunch of horny boys
trying to get their fuck on with my daughter."
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- Your dad talks like that?
- Hell yeah.
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And it's not like
he ain't gonna know, either,
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because when I'm staying at the lake house
with my girlfriends in our bikinis,
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Daddy just has a tendency to pop up
and make sure we don't need anything.
111
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Look, he's totally harmless
and cute as a bug's ear!
112
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But you know, when he's got
a bunch of half-naked poontang
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walking the floor of his lake house,
114
00:08:01,681 --> 00:08:05,082
he just likes to pay us a visit
and make sure we got everything we need.
115
00:08:05,151 --> 00:08:06,709
And if you flirt shamelessly with him,
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like the six-foot baby giraffe
in the backseat,
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you got a puppy dog for life.
118
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I have my own relationship with Ben,
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and you 're just jealous
'cause it don't include you.
120
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You call her dad "Ben"?
121
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I'm not a child.
That's his name.
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00:08:18,898 --> 00:08:20,866
So, when are the boys
showing up?
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They're gonna meet us
at the Chili Parlor.
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Maybe they can bring some pot.
125
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Fuck that. No.
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I don't wanna be either A,
depending on their fucking ass,
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or B, depending on their ass.
128
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Uh-uh. If we don't score ourselves,
129
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we're gonna be stuck with them
all fucking night.
130
00:08:34,213 --> 00:08:36,340
Ooh! Try Lanna-Frank.
131
00:08:36,415 --> 00:08:38,110
Best idea you had all day.
132
00:08:38,184 --> 00:08:41,210
Oh, hey! That's your
last billboard before Guero's!
133
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Oh, come on, give me a break.
134
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Oh, come on, my ass!
We said every time.
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Okay.
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##
137
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Jules, let me get a drag.
138
00:09:03,376 --> 00:09:04,638
Thanks.
139
00:09:35,441 --> 00:09:36,430
Oh, my God.
140
00:09:36,809 --> 00:09:39,710
Hey, this is...
and I's U.T. days, Arlene.
141
00:09:39,779 --> 00:09:40,768
Hey.
142
00:09:40,846 --> 00:09:43,440
- You wanna join us?
- For a second, but I'm with some friends.
143
00:09:44,083 --> 00:09:45,482
Ooh...
144
00:09:45,551 --> 00:09:47,712
So, you must be... must be...
145
00:09:47,787 --> 00:09:50,585
So, you must be
the infamous Butterfly.
146
00:09:50,656 --> 00:09:51,884
Shh!
147
00:09:51,958 --> 00:09:53,858
She don't know nothing about it.
148
00:09:53,926 --> 00:09:55,757
- Know about what?
- When were y'all gonna tell her?
149
00:09:55,828 --> 00:09:56,920
- Soon.
- Tell me what?
150
00:09:56,996 --> 00:09:59,726
Yeah, now thanks to you,
we've gotta tell her sooner than later.
151
00:09:59,799 --> 00:10:01,391
All right, cut the shit.
What the fuck is going on?
152
00:10:01,467 --> 00:10:04,129
I said a little something-something
about you on the air today.
153
00:10:04,203 --> 00:10:06,398
Julia, what the fuck
did you say about me on the radio?
154
00:10:06,472 --> 00:10:09,908
All I said was I had
a sexy friend named Butterfly
155
00:10:09,976 --> 00:10:12,001
who was in from out-of-town
for the weekend,
156
00:10:12,078 --> 00:10:14,706
and we would be going out
somewhere in Austin tonight,
157
00:10:14,780 --> 00:10:17,180
and if they were out on the town,
maybe they'd see us.
158
00:10:17,249 --> 00:10:21,845
And I described you, and I said
that if they spotted you while we were out,
159
00:10:21,921 --> 00:10:24,890
if they'd do something,
you 'd do something.
160
00:10:24,957 --> 00:10:26,254
Okay, now, Julia, I'm serious.
161
00:10:26,325 --> 00:10:28,725
What did you say
and what did you say I'd do?
162
00:10:28,794 --> 00:10:32,730
Anywho, I could explain what I said,
which would be boring,
163
00:10:32,798 --> 00:10:35,460
or Marcy over here,
164
00:10:35,534 --> 00:10:38,094
who is an incredible actress,
could act it out for you,
165
00:10:38,170 --> 00:10:42,266
which I think will give you a better idea
what you have in store for you tonight.
166
00:10:42,341 --> 00:10:44,400
Okay, so just tell me your way.
167
00:10:44,477 --> 00:10:46,468
- So we'll act it out with Marcy?
- Sure.
168
00:10:46,545 --> 00:10:48,740
Okay, give Marcy your drink.
169
00:10:49,982 --> 00:10:53,440
Okay, so you 're
in a club or a bar,
170
00:10:53,519 --> 00:10:56,579
and Marcy's a kind of cute
or kind of hot or kind of sexy
171
00:10:56,656 --> 00:10:58,385
or better be
fucking hysterically funny,
172
00:10:58,457 --> 00:11:01,187
but not-funny-looking guy
who you could fuck.
173
00:11:01,260 --> 00:11:02,488
Got it.
174
00:11:02,561 --> 00:11:04,324
Okay, Marcy, take it.
175
00:11:13,139 --> 00:11:14,436
Howdy.
176
00:11:14,507 --> 00:11:16,805
Hi, there.
177
00:11:16,876 --> 00:11:19,572
Excuse me, but...
178
00:11:19,645 --> 00:11:21,704
your name wouldn't be
"Butterfly," would it?
179
00:11:21,781 --> 00:11:25,683
Yes, it is, and it seems
you have me at a disadvantage.
180
00:11:25,751 --> 00:11:27,184
Barry.
181
00:11:27,253 --> 00:11:28,948
Pleased to meet you, Barry.
182
00:11:29,021 --> 00:11:30,488
Y'all are gettin' me hot!
183
00:11:30,556 --> 00:11:31,682
Shh!
184
00:11:34,860 --> 00:11:39,024
So is, uh...
"Butterfly" your real name?
185
00:11:39,098 --> 00:11:40,827
Yes, it is.
186
00:11:40,900 --> 00:11:42,834
And how'd you know
my name, Barry?
187
00:11:42,902 --> 00:11:45,700
I listened to Jungle Julia's show
this mornin'.
188
00:11:45,771 --> 00:11:46,897
Oh, you did, did you?
189
00:11:46,972 --> 00:11:49,304
Oh, yeah, I listen to her show
every morning.
190
00:11:49,375 --> 00:11:51,400
Oh, you do, do you?
191
00:11:51,477 --> 00:11:54,469
Yeah, she's like
the coolest lady in town.
192
00:11:54,547 --> 00:11:57,015
Don't you think
she's got a big ass?
193
00:11:57,083 --> 00:12:00,484
Nah, man!
I like her ass that way.
194
00:12:00,553 --> 00:12:02,521
She got a black girl's ass.
195
00:12:02,588 --> 00:12:04,249
Well, that's what she always says,
196
00:12:04,323 --> 00:12:07,190
but in actual fact, she doesn't
really have a black girl's ass.
197
00:12:07,259 --> 00:12:09,250
She's got a big ass.
198
00:12:09,328 --> 00:12:10,727
Okay, what the fuck
are you doing?
199
00:12:10,796 --> 00:12:12,661
Look who wants
to get to the point all of a sudden.
200
00:12:12,732 --> 00:12:13,926
Okay, we'll get to the point,
201
00:12:13,999 --> 00:12:15,899
but for your information,
skinny bitch,
202
00:12:15,968 --> 00:12:19,062
black men and a whole lot
of motherfuckin' white men
203
00:12:19,138 --> 00:12:21,698
have had plenty of fun
adoring my ass.
204
00:12:21,774 --> 00:12:24,902
I don't wear their teeth marks
on my butt for nothing.
205
00:12:24,977 --> 00:12:27,411
If you 're not gonna buy me a drink,
can I have mine back?
206
00:12:27,480 --> 00:12:29,846
No, okay, okay, okay, okay.
207
00:12:29,915 --> 00:12:31,246
So, Butterfly...
208
00:12:31,317 --> 00:12:32,807
can I buy you a drink?
209
00:12:32,885 --> 00:12:34,216
I'd love one.
210
00:12:34,286 --> 00:12:35,275
What can I get ya?
211
00:12:35,354 --> 00:12:36,946
I'll take a margarita.
212
00:12:38,357 --> 00:12:39,449
Here ya go.
213
00:12:40,693 --> 00:12:42,627
So, after they buy you a drink
214
00:12:42,695 --> 00:12:45,095
when they raise
their glass to toast,
215
00:12:45,164 --> 00:12:50,158
they look you dead in the eye
and repeat this poem...
216
00:12:50,236 --> 00:12:54,605
"The woods are lovely,
dark and deep
217
00:12:54,673 --> 00:12:59,838
And I have promises to keep
and miles to go before I sleep."
218
00:12:59,912 --> 00:13:01,777
Did you hear me, Butterfly?
219
00:13:01,847 --> 00:13:04,816
"Miles to go before you sleep."
220
00:13:04,884 --> 00:13:08,513
And then, if they say that...
221
00:13:09,855 --> 00:13:11,186
you gotta give 'em a lap dance.
222
00:13:11,257 --> 00:13:12,884
What?
223
00:13:12,958 --> 00:13:15,449
If they call you "Butterfly,"
buy you a drink, repeat that poem,
224
00:13:15,528 --> 00:13:16,517
you gotta give 'em a lap dance.
225
00:13:16,595 --> 00:13:18,495
That's bullshit.
I ain't giving them nothin'.
226
00:13:18,564 --> 00:13:20,191
Well, you can do it or not,
but if you don't,
227
00:13:20,266 --> 00:13:22,564
everybody in Austin
is gonna think you a chicken shit.
228
00:13:22,635 --> 00:13:24,159
And I don't think you want
everybody in Austin
229
00:13:24,236 --> 00:13:25,760
thinking you 're a chicken shit.
230
00:13:25,838 --> 00:13:27,999
I ain't giving nobody no lap dance
'cause of what you said.
231
00:13:28,073 --> 00:13:30,098
Oh, come on!
It's gonna be funny!
232
00:13:30,176 --> 00:13:32,940
Yeah, everything's funny to you two
when it's happening to me.
233
00:13:33,012 --> 00:13:36,209
Look. You don't have to do it
for anybody you don't want.
234
00:13:36,282 --> 00:13:38,250
I said you 'd do it
for the first guy who says it.
235
00:13:38,317 --> 00:13:41,343
So, some geek comes over
trying to be cool,
236
00:13:41,420 --> 00:13:44,321
just tell him you already did it
at another place earlier.
237
00:13:44,390 --> 00:13:48,121
No harm, no foul,
but you get a free drink out of it.
238
00:13:48,194 --> 00:13:50,754
But maybe a little later
in the evening,
239
00:13:50,830 --> 00:13:52,354
you 've had a few drinks,
240
00:13:52,431 --> 00:13:54,626
you 're kind of loosey-goosey,
241
00:13:54,700 --> 00:13:56,497
you 're safe with your girls,
242
00:13:56,569 --> 00:13:59,299
then some kind of cute,
kind of hot, kind of sexy,
243
00:13:59,371 --> 00:14:03,171
hysterically funny, but not-funny-looking guy
comes up and says it...
244
00:14:03,242 --> 00:14:07,338
then maybe you did it earlier,
maybe you didn't.
245
00:14:12,852 --> 00:14:14,410
She's making me trip.
246
00:14:14,486 --> 00:14:18,923
Shut the fuck up.
You made me trip, dumb bitch!
247
00:14:29,201 --> 00:14:30,964
You fuckin' idiot!
248
00:14:57,129 --> 00:14:59,859
##
249
00:14:59,932 --> 00:15:02,992
# Baby #
250
00:15:20,452 --> 00:15:25,253
# It doesn 't matter
what they say #
251
00:15:25,324 --> 00:15:28,885
# I know I' m gonna love you
any old way #
252
00:15:28,961 --> 00:15:35,230
# What can I do without you? #
253
00:15:35,301 --> 00:15:40,796
# Don 't want nobody. nobody #
254
00:15:40,873 --> 00:15:44,036
# Baby. it's you #
255
00:15:46,078 --> 00:15:49,844
# Baby. it's you #
256
00:15:50,683 --> 00:15:54,517
# Don 't leave me alone #
257
00:15:55,788 --> 00:15:59,622
# Come on home #
258
00:16:00,893 --> 00:16:04,420
# Baby. it's you #
259
00:16:05,965 --> 00:16:08,866
# Baby. it's you... #
260
00:16:11,637 --> 00:16:12,899
Any dead soldiers here?
261
00:16:12,972 --> 00:16:14,997
Uh, these two. Thank you.
262
00:16:16,809 --> 00:16:18,367
Where the hell is Lanna-Frank?
263
00:16:18,444 --> 00:16:21,538
That's a good fucking question.
264
00:16:32,091 --> 00:16:33,353
Lanna-Frank!
265
00:16:34,059 --> 00:16:35,549
Where are you?
266
00:16:37,463 --> 00:16:39,590
Well, come over already.
We're waiting for you.
267
00:16:39,665 --> 00:16:42,930
- ##
- Shit! Hold on!
268
00:16:55,114 --> 00:16:56,706
So, where are you?
269
00:16:57,883 --> 00:16:59,908
Come over already.
We're waiting for you.
270
00:17:00,886 --> 00:17:02,945
No. We're not coming over there.
271
00:17:03,022 --> 00:17:06,185
You come over here
like you said you would.
272
00:17:06,258 --> 00:17:09,250
So, is it Shauna and the girls
at the lake house this weekend?
273
00:17:09,328 --> 00:17:11,796
- Shauna?
- Oh, fuck. l...
274
00:17:11,864 --> 00:17:12,853
No.
275
00:17:12,931 --> 00:17:15,866
Now, there is one thing
that every girl in the whole world
276
00:17:15,934 --> 00:17:18,767
whose name is Shanna
has in common with each other.
277
00:17:18,837 --> 00:17:20,395
We all hate the name "Shauna,"
278
00:17:20,472 --> 00:17:22,906
and we really hate it
when people call us "Shauna."
279
00:18:00,112 --> 00:18:01,374
Just remember...
280
00:18:01,447 --> 00:18:04,109
it's "Shanna Banana,"
not "Shauna Banauna."
281
00:18:04,183 --> 00:18:07,380
Okay, but at some point in the evening,
I had fuckability stock.
282
00:18:07,453 --> 00:18:10,786
Yeah, I mean, it wasn't bullish, but...
283
00:18:35,147 --> 00:18:37,479
##
284
00:18:37,549 --> 00:18:41,542
Okay... Warren's sending over shots,
and you know the house rules.
285
00:18:41,620 --> 00:18:44,316
If he sends over shots,
you gotta do them.
286
00:18:44,389 --> 00:18:46,755
- What?
- Hey, them's the rules, baby.
287
00:18:46,825 --> 00:18:50,352
- Warren says it, we do it!
I love that philosophy!
288
00:18:50,429 --> 00:18:52,829
"Warren says it, we do it."
289
00:18:52,898 --> 00:18:54,866
So let's do it!
290
00:18:54,933 --> 00:18:55,991
What is it?
291
00:18:56,068 --> 00:19:00,027
Hey, shot first, questions later.
Here we go. Post time!
292
00:19:01,206 --> 00:19:02,503
Mmm!
293
00:19:04,910 --> 00:19:06,434
Whoo-hoo!
294
00:19:10,082 --> 00:19:13,882
Now, is that a tasty beverage
or is that a tasty beverage?
295
00:19:13,952 --> 00:19:15,214
What the fuck is it?!
296
00:19:15,287 --> 00:19:16,879
Chartreuse.
297
00:19:16,955 --> 00:19:20,152
The only liquor so good
they named a color after it.
298
00:19:22,027 --> 00:19:23,619
Who's down for dos Chartreuse?
299
00:19:23,695 --> 00:19:25,959
Not me.
300
00:19:26,031 --> 00:19:27,828
I'm going out for a smoke.
301
00:19:27,900 --> 00:19:30,300
Okay, but careful where you keep
that hot flame, all right?
302
00:19:30,369 --> 00:19:31,893
You 'll blow up the joint.
303
00:19:41,413 --> 00:19:43,404
##
304
00:19:45,250 --> 00:19:46,615
Drinks.
What can we get you?
305
00:19:46,685 --> 00:19:47,777
Shanna Banana?
306
00:19:47,853 --> 00:19:50,413
Another big-ass
Long Island iced tea.
307
00:19:50,489 --> 00:19:53,458
Bombay Sapphire
and tonic with no ice.
308
00:19:53,525 --> 00:19:55,254
Good boy.
309
00:20:16,949 --> 00:20:17,938
Oh, hey, Punky.
310
00:20:18,016 --> 00:20:20,780
Uh, one of the lights
is off in the parking lot. Flip it.
311
00:20:54,553 --> 00:20:56,851
- Oh! Jesus Christ!
- Whoa-ho!
312
00:20:57,990 --> 00:21:00,083
You scared the fuck out of me,
you shitty asshole!
313
00:21:00,158 --> 00:21:02,683
I swear, Arlene.
I was not trying to scare you.
314
00:21:02,761 --> 00:21:04,592
I just... got lucky.
315
00:21:04,663 --> 00:21:06,460
Oh, hardee-fucking-har.
316
00:21:06,531 --> 00:21:07,862
- Let's go inside.
- Wait a minute.
317
00:21:07,933 --> 00:21:10,800
- Why?
- I was thinkin' we could make out.
318
00:21:10,869 --> 00:21:11,858
What, on a porch?
319
00:21:11,937 --> 00:21:13,802
Not even in the bar,
but in front of the entrance?
320
00:21:13,872 --> 00:21:15,897
- Forget it.
- No, in my car.
321
00:21:15,974 --> 00:21:18,568
What, out there?
It's wet as fucking 'Nam out there.
322
00:21:18,644 --> 00:21:20,236
Not in my car it's not.
323
00:21:20,846 --> 00:21:22,871
Look, you won't get wet.
324
00:21:22,948 --> 00:21:25,109
I promise you.
325
00:21:27,586 --> 00:21:29,577
You know, most guys
wouldn't brag about that.
326
00:21:29,655 --> 00:21:31,384
Ha ha ha.
327
00:21:31,456 --> 00:21:33,253
I mean...
you know what I mean.
328
00:21:33,325 --> 00:21:35,316
Look, I know you guys
are going to Lake L.B.J.
329
00:21:35,394 --> 00:21:36,725
and we can't come.
330
00:21:37,896 --> 00:21:39,488
I wanna make out...
331
00:21:39,564 --> 00:21:42,362
Okay, just stop with the whining.
It's not attractive.
332
00:21:48,440 --> 00:21:52,342
I don't want it super fucking obvious
to everybody in the bar we've been gone,
333
00:21:52,411 --> 00:21:56,006
- so we'll make out for six minutes, deal?
- Great.
334
00:21:56,081 --> 00:21:57,378
No, no, no.
Deal or no deal?
335
00:21:57,449 --> 00:21:59,644
If you 're gonna whine
when I pull the plug in six minutes,
336
00:21:59,718 --> 00:22:02,016
we could just walk back
inside the fucking bar right now.
337
00:22:02,087 --> 00:22:03,645
- Deal. No whining.
- And no begging.
338
00:22:03,722 --> 00:22:06,156
And no begging.
When you say "done," it's done.
339
00:22:06,224 --> 00:22:08,192
I'm gonna remember
you said that.
340
00:22:08,260 --> 00:22:09,420
Okay, let's go.
341
00:22:11,863 --> 00:22:15,663
Oh, you got two jobs... kiss good
and make sure my hair don't get wet.
342
00:22:24,810 --> 00:22:28,302
##
343
00:22:37,189 --> 00:22:39,953
# It was early. early one morning #
344
00:22:40,025 --> 00:22:43,085
# When I heard my bulldog bark #
345
00:22:43,161 --> 00:22:46,426
# It was Staggolee and Billy Lyons #
346
00:22:46,498 --> 00:22:48,489
# Squabblin ' in the dark... #
347
00:22:48,567 --> 00:22:51,127
Now, look, you can't look like
you 're trying to get her out of here
348
00:22:51,203 --> 00:22:52,568
before Christian Simonson shows up,
349
00:22:52,637 --> 00:22:55,265
but you 've got to get her out of here
before Christian Simonson shows up.
350
00:22:55,340 --> 00:22:56,329
Yeah, but what's the point?
351
00:22:56,408 --> 00:22:58,376
They're going to Shanna's
daddy's house at Lake L.B.J.,
352
00:22:58,443 --> 00:22:59,603
and it's no guys.
353
00:22:59,678 --> 00:23:01,236
Absolutely no guys.
354
00:23:01,313 --> 00:23:03,907
Okay. So after we bring
the girls' drinks,
355
00:23:03,982 --> 00:23:08,715
in fairly rapid order, but not obvious,
we order two more rounds of shots.
356
00:23:08,787 --> 00:23:11,255
You think they're gonna fall for that?
357
00:23:11,323 --> 00:23:13,814
We'll be very convincing.
358
00:23:14,326 --> 00:23:16,521
Now it's time to turn up the volume.
No more fucking around.
359
00:23:16,595 --> 00:23:18,153
We go to J�ger shots.
360
00:23:18,830 --> 00:23:21,390
Man, they're not gonna drink J�ger shots.
361
00:23:21,466 --> 00:23:22,956
Dude, as long as
a guy's buying the booze,
362
00:23:23,034 --> 00:23:25,059
a fucking bitch
will drink anything.
363
00:23:25,137 --> 00:23:26,468
Come on, dude, we can
at least get one shot of J�ger
364
00:23:26,538 --> 00:23:28,199
down these
fucking bitches' throats.
365
00:23:28,273 --> 00:23:30,366
After that, we'll see if they get
another J�ger shot in them.
366
00:23:30,442 --> 00:23:31,431
You never know.
367
00:23:31,510 --> 00:23:33,910
That could be the shot
that puts them past the point of "fuck it."
368
00:23:33,979 --> 00:23:35,776
Then all of a sudden
"no guys at the lake house"
369
00:23:35,847 --> 00:23:37,781
turns into a couple of guys
at the lake house.
370
00:23:37,849 --> 00:23:39,316
My point exactly.
371
00:23:39,384 --> 00:23:41,511
And I know I can at least get
"Shanna Suck-my-banana"
372
00:23:41,586 --> 00:23:44,282
to do a fucking Buttery Nipple shot.
What's Julia's sweet shot?
373
00:23:45,290 --> 00:23:46,951
- Key Lime Pie.
- Oh, come on, dude.
374
00:23:47,025 --> 00:23:49,357
Even fucking Leroy Brown
would do one more for dessert.
375
00:23:52,998 --> 00:23:54,693
Dude, check it out.
376
00:23:54,766 --> 00:23:56,825
I wonder if B.J.
brought the bear with him.
377
00:23:59,337 --> 00:24:00,531
Jesus.
378
00:24:03,842 --> 00:24:06,606
Dude fucking cut himself
falling out of his time machine.
379
00:24:07,813 --> 00:24:11,078
Hi, could I get a chicken suit
for Stroker Ace, please?
380
00:24:12,317 --> 00:24:15,445
# See the hole
I shot in his head #
381
00:24:15,520 --> 00:24:18,353
# The high sheriff
told the deputy #
382
00:24:18,423 --> 00:24:21,415
# Get your pistols
and come with me #
383
00:24:21,493 --> 00:24:24,894
# We got to go arrest
a bad man #
384
00:24:24,963 --> 00:24:27,261
# Known as Staggolee... #
385
00:24:30,836 --> 00:24:33,828
# They laid them on the shelf
386
00:24:33,905 --> 00:24:36,931
# If you want
that bad man Staggolee #
387
00:24:37,008 --> 00:24:40,307
# You 'll have to arrest him yourself
388
00:24:40,378 --> 00:24:42,972
# The high sheriff
asked the bartender... #
389
00:24:43,048 --> 00:24:45,107
And where did you two disappear to?
390
00:24:45,183 --> 00:24:46,445
I had to get something
out of the car,
391
00:24:46,518 --> 00:24:49,749
and Nate was gentlemanly enough
to escort me with his umbrella.
392
00:24:49,821 --> 00:24:51,686
Ah, good for you, Nate.
393
00:24:51,756 --> 00:24:54,190
You see that pretty girl
sitting by herself at the bar?
394
00:24:56,995 --> 00:24:58,622
Who, the dirty hippie?
395
00:24:58,697 --> 00:25:00,528
Meow. She's not a hippie.
396
00:25:00,599 --> 00:25:01,725
She might as well be a hippie.
397
00:25:03,468 --> 00:25:05,026
Thank you, Timmy boy.
398
00:25:06,137 --> 00:25:08,662
Well, do you know
what just happened to her?
399
00:25:08,740 --> 00:25:11,504
No, but I know she's
a skinny, fake, blonde bitch.
400
00:25:14,012 --> 00:25:16,640
Oh, I'm sorry.
You were telling a story?
401
00:25:16,715 --> 00:25:17,704
What about her?
402
00:25:20,452 --> 00:25:21,578
Hey, Warren!
403
00:25:21,653 --> 00:25:24,781
Is there anybody you could
vouch for to give me a ride home?
404
00:25:26,758 --> 00:25:29,886
Fair lady, your chariot awaits.
405
00:25:29,961 --> 00:25:31,861
You 've been eavesdropping?
406
00:25:31,930 --> 00:25:34,592
There's eavesdropping
and "can't help but hear."
407
00:25:34,666 --> 00:25:36,691
I think I belong
in the latter category.
408
00:25:38,003 --> 00:25:39,664
So, uh, Icy Hot.
409
00:25:39,738 --> 00:25:41,968
You 're offering me a ride home?
410
00:25:42,040 --> 00:25:45,669
I'm offering you a lift if when
I'm ready to leave, you are, too.
411
00:25:45,744 --> 00:25:47,974
And when are you
thinking about leaving?
412
00:25:48,046 --> 00:25:49,911
Truthfully,
I'm not thinking about it.
413
00:25:50,582 --> 00:25:53,983
But when I do,
you will be the first to know.
414
00:25:54,052 --> 00:25:56,418
Will you be able
to, uh, drive later?
415
00:25:56,488 --> 00:25:58,513
I know looks can be deceiving.
416
00:25:59,958 --> 00:26:01,448
But I'm a teetotaler.
417
00:26:01,526 --> 00:26:03,653
I've been drinking
club soda and lime all night,
418
00:26:03,728 --> 00:26:05,719
and now I'm building up
to my big drink.
419
00:26:05,797 --> 00:26:10,097
- Which is what?
- Virgin pi�a colada.
420
00:26:10,936 --> 00:26:13,837
Okay. Why would
someone who doesn't drink
421
00:26:13,905 --> 00:26:16,772
spend hours at a bar drinking water?
422
00:26:16,841 --> 00:26:20,504
You know, a bar offers
all kind of things other than alcohol.
423
00:26:20,579 --> 00:26:23,070
Mmm. Really?
424
00:26:23,148 --> 00:26:24,513
Like what?
425
00:26:26,618 --> 00:26:27,744
Women.
426
00:26:27,819 --> 00:26:30,287
Nacho grande platters.
427
00:26:30,355 --> 00:26:32,915
The fellowship
of some fascinating individuals,
428
00:26:32,991 --> 00:26:34,083
like Warren here.
429
00:26:35,393 --> 00:26:36,985
Alcohol is just a lubricant
430
00:26:37,062 --> 00:26:40,429
for all the individual
encounters that a barroom offers.
431
00:26:40,498 --> 00:26:42,966
Ooh. Is that cowboy wisdom?
432
00:26:43,034 --> 00:26:44,968
I'm not a cowboy, Pam.
433
00:26:46,471 --> 00:26:47,631
I'm a stuntman.
434
00:26:47,706 --> 00:26:52,075
But that's a very
easy mistake to make.
435
00:26:52,143 --> 00:26:54,134
How do you know my name?
436
00:26:54,212 --> 00:26:57,340
When you were talking with Warren...
437
00:26:57,415 --> 00:26:58,746
couldn't help but overhear.
438
00:27:00,552 --> 00:27:01,541
Fair enough.
439
00:27:01,620 --> 00:27:03,247
So what's your name, Icy?
440
00:27:04,589 --> 00:27:06,022
Stuntman Mike.
441
00:27:07,025 --> 00:27:08,549
Stuntman Mike's your name?
442
00:27:08,627 --> 00:27:11,425
Tsk. You ask anybody.
443
00:27:12,697 --> 00:27:13,994
Hey, Warren.
444
00:27:14,065 --> 00:27:15,430
Who is this guy?
445
00:27:15,500 --> 00:27:17,331
Stuntman Mike.
446
00:27:17,402 --> 00:27:19,427
And who the hell
is Stuntman Mike?
447
00:27:19,504 --> 00:27:20,732
He's a stuntman.
448
00:27:20,805 --> 00:27:23,638
Warren! Six shots of Wild Turkey!
449
00:27:23,708 --> 00:27:26,336
# I' ve just got to know #
450
00:27:26,411 --> 00:27:28,208
# Should I go leave #
451
00:27:28,913 --> 00:27:32,974
# And find somebody else #
452
00:27:33,051 --> 00:27:36,817
# You know I stood yesterday #
453
00:27:36,888 --> 00:27:38,253
Yeah!
454
00:27:38,323 --> 00:27:39,312
##
455
00:27:39,391 --> 00:27:40,551
Yeah!
456
00:27:43,662 --> 00:27:44,651
Let's do 'em!
457
00:27:44,729 --> 00:27:46,390
Salud.
458
00:27:46,464 --> 00:27:48,193
Down the snatch.
459
00:27:48,266 --> 00:27:51,758
You know, Pam,
I think it's time for my big drink.
460
00:27:52,771 --> 00:27:56,400
Well, Stuntman Mike,
since I have a tab here,
461
00:27:56,474 --> 00:27:58,601
can I buy you that
virgin pi�a colada?
462
00:27:58,677 --> 00:28:00,872
Thank you, Pam.
That'd be lovely.
463
00:28:00,945 --> 00:28:02,412
Warren!
464
00:28:02,480 --> 00:28:05,608
A, uh, virgin pi�a colada
for my stuntman friend
465
00:28:05,684 --> 00:28:08,312
and I'll have another
Cadillac Cabo Wabo margarita.
466
00:28:08,386 --> 00:28:10,115
Cabo Wabo, virgin.
467
00:28:27,238 --> 00:28:30,230
##
468
00:28:42,153 --> 00:28:44,621
# People. I' ve been misled #
469
00:28:46,157 --> 00:28:49,854
# And I' ve been afraid #
470
00:28:51,162 --> 00:28:54,029
# I' ve been hit in the head #
471
00:28:54,099 --> 00:28:57,159
# And left for days #
472
00:28:57,869 --> 00:29:00,235
# I' ve been abused #
473
00:29:01,606 --> 00:29:04,439
# And I' ve been accused #
474
00:29:05,310 --> 00:29:08,768
# I' ve been refused #
475
00:29:08,847 --> 00:29:10,439
# A piece of bread... #
476
00:29:11,282 --> 00:29:14,080
- Ah!
- Hey, if it ain't Lanna-Frank.
477
00:29:14,152 --> 00:29:15,414
Mwah.
478
00:29:15,487 --> 00:29:16,818
- Hey, baby.
- How are you?
479
00:29:16,888 --> 00:29:18,185
- # In my life before #
- Hey, what's up?
480
00:29:18,256 --> 00:29:19,518
Hey!
481
00:29:19,591 --> 00:29:22,219
Hey, what's shakin', bacon?
482
00:29:22,293 --> 00:29:24,261
Hey.
483
00:29:24,329 --> 00:29:27,162
# Go wrong as I do today #
484
00:29:27,232 --> 00:29:30,201
- # I want you to stop... #
- Well, let's scootch over, now.
485
00:29:30,268 --> 00:29:32,236
It's about fucking time.
486
00:29:32,303 --> 00:29:34,601
Well, beggars can't be choosers.
487
00:29:35,206 --> 00:29:37,299
Take a picture.
It lasts longer.
488
00:29:38,576 --> 00:29:39,736
What?
489
00:29:39,811 --> 00:29:40,937
That table.
490
00:29:41,012 --> 00:29:42,912
Seems to keep,
um, getting your attention.
491
00:29:42,981 --> 00:29:45,472
Is that the girl
from the billboard outside?
492
00:29:45,550 --> 00:29:46,539
Yep.
493
00:29:46,618 --> 00:29:49,781
She sure is a striking-looking woman.
494
00:29:49,854 --> 00:29:51,788
It's got gin, tequila, J�ger...
495
00:29:51,856 --> 00:29:52,845
Look at that hair.
496
00:29:52,924 --> 00:29:54,323
Lots of leave-in conditioner.
497
00:29:55,860 --> 00:29:57,851
Is that jealousy I detect?
498
00:29:57,929 --> 00:30:01,888
Hardly. But if you want
to get with, uh, Jungle Julia,
499
00:30:01,966 --> 00:30:03,797
there's a real easy way to do that.
500
00:30:03,868 --> 00:30:05,426
Really, what would that be?
501
00:30:05,503 --> 00:30:08,939
Get famous. You won't have
to find her... she'll find you.
502
00:30:09,007 --> 00:30:12,374
And you don't even want to know
what she did for that billboard.
503
00:30:12,443 --> 00:30:13,967
Enjoy it, cocksucker.
504
00:30:14,045 --> 00:30:15,478
You 've earned it.
505
00:30:15,547 --> 00:30:17,481
What did she ever do to you?
506
00:30:17,549 --> 00:30:20,211
We went to school together
from kindergarten through high school.
507
00:30:20,285 --> 00:30:22,219
That's what she did to me.
508
00:30:22,287 --> 00:30:24,881
She was her height right now at 12.
509
00:30:24,956 --> 00:30:26,787
She was a monster.
510
00:30:26,858 --> 00:30:30,760
Half the guys she still fucks
she used to terrorize in the fifth grade.
511
00:30:30,829 --> 00:30:33,627
And she used to beat you up
and take your chocolate milk, huh?
512
00:30:33,698 --> 00:30:35,222
That pituitary case?
513
00:30:35,300 --> 00:30:36,995
Might have kicked my ass
a couple of times...
514
00:30:37,068 --> 00:30:39,901
sorry, I'm built like a girl,
not a black man...
515
00:30:39,971 --> 00:30:43,634
but I'd die before I ever gave
Julia Lucai my chocolate milk.
516
00:31:15,273 --> 00:31:19,004
Hey! Are you
famous or somethin'?
517
00:31:19,077 --> 00:31:20,442
Or somethin'.
518
00:31:20,511 --> 00:31:21,876
No, no, no. Really.
519
00:31:23,047 --> 00:31:24,878
Hey, what do... what do you do?
520
00:31:25,783 --> 00:31:27,080
Really?
521
00:31:27,151 --> 00:31:31,053
What I do is work my ass off to get
my own record label off the ground,
522
00:31:31,122 --> 00:31:35,616
but why that girl wanted a picture of me
is because I'm a local D.J.
523
00:31:38,096 --> 00:31:39,529
Wait a minute.
524
00:31:40,832 --> 00:31:44,359
You 've got a billboard
by Big Kahuna Burger, don't you?
525
00:31:44,435 --> 00:31:45,902
Yeah.
526
00:31:45,970 --> 00:31:48,370
I got one there, too, Zatoichi.
527
00:31:51,209 --> 00:31:52,437
Yeah.
528
00:31:54,145 --> 00:31:55,737
Jungle Julia Lucai.
529
00:31:55,813 --> 00:31:57,747
Stuntman Mike McKay.
530
00:31:57,815 --> 00:31:59,180
Well.
531
00:31:59,250 --> 00:32:02,344
Good to meet you, Stuntman Mike.
532
00:32:02,420 --> 00:32:04,752
My friends and I are going
to continue to get our weed on.
533
00:32:04,822 --> 00:32:06,084
Would you care for some?
534
00:32:06,157 --> 00:32:07,590
Thank you, Julia,
535
00:32:07,659 --> 00:32:10,526
but just the same...
no thanks.
536
00:32:10,595 --> 00:32:12,119
- Suit yourself.
- But you know...
537
00:32:22,206 --> 00:32:24,140
Oh, shit.
538
00:32:24,208 --> 00:32:25,368
Ah! My God.
539
00:32:28,179 --> 00:32:29,339
Sorry. It's nothing.
540
00:32:32,951 --> 00:32:34,316
What the fuck was that?
541
00:32:38,890 --> 00:32:40,755
You got some voucher here.
542
00:32:40,825 --> 00:32:42,486
I asked him
what movies you worked on.
543
00:32:42,560 --> 00:32:44,255
No fuckin' clue.
544
00:32:44,329 --> 00:32:47,560
Well, technically I really don't know
if he's ever done anything for sure.
545
00:32:47,632 --> 00:32:50,601
I mean, he shows me
an episode of High Chaparral.
546
00:32:50,668 --> 00:32:52,067
a guy falls off a horse,
547
00:32:52,136 --> 00:32:53,228
he says it's him.
548
00:32:55,006 --> 00:32:57,236
You know the show The Virginian?
549
00:32:58,943 --> 00:33:01,639
Yeah, well, there was another
actor on that show, Gary Clarke,
550
00:33:01,713 --> 00:33:03,578
and I looked like him a bit...
551
00:33:03,648 --> 00:33:06,811
well, obviously
before I cut myself shaving.
552
00:33:06,884 --> 00:33:08,852
Tsk. Aww, I like it.
553
00:33:08,920 --> 00:33:13,152
Well, damn, if you ain't so sweet
you make sugar taste just like salt.
554
00:33:13,224 --> 00:33:16,660
Anyway, I did a lot of Virginians
doubling Gary Clarke.
555
00:33:16,728 --> 00:33:20,459
And, uh... then that show turned
into The Men of Shiloh.
556
00:33:20,531 --> 00:33:23,261
they brought on Lee Majors,
and I doubled him.
557
00:33:23,334 --> 00:33:26,599
From that point on
I specialized mostly in car stunts.
558
00:33:26,671 --> 00:33:30,232
Yeah, I did damn near
the whole third season of Vega$ .
559
00:33:30,308 --> 00:33:32,538
I was Robert Urich's driving double.
560
00:33:32,610 --> 00:33:35,477
And then Bob
did another show, Gavilan.
561
00:33:35,546 --> 00:33:38,037
and he brought me
with him on that, till...
562
00:33:39,817 --> 00:33:41,079
And after that...
563
00:33:45,256 --> 00:33:48,623
Do you know any of these shows
or people I'm talkin' about?
564
00:33:48,693 --> 00:33:50,058
Sorry.
565
00:33:50,128 --> 00:33:51,117
- No?
- Mm-mm.
566
00:33:51,195 --> 00:33:52,856
No, no.
567
00:33:55,433 --> 00:34:00,666
So how exactly does one
become a stuntman, Stuntman Mike?
568
00:34:02,907 --> 00:34:07,071
Well, in Hollywood, anybody fool enough
to throw himself down a flight of stairs
569
00:34:07,145 --> 00:34:09,875
can usually find somebody
to pay him for it.
570
00:34:09,947 --> 00:34:13,576
But really I got into the business the way
most people get into the stunt business.
571
00:34:13,651 --> 00:34:14,913
How's that?
572
00:34:14,986 --> 00:34:17,477
- My brother got me in it.
- Well, who's your brother?
573
00:34:17,555 --> 00:34:18,920
Stuntman Bob.
574
00:34:32,470 --> 00:34:33,664
I'm ready to blaze!
575
00:34:33,738 --> 00:34:36,605
Finally, yeah.
You need to catch up with us.
576
00:34:36,674 --> 00:34:38,938
- Now the party can start.
- Yep.
577
00:34:39,010 --> 00:34:42,343
Anywho, I'm sorry.
You forgive me?
578
00:34:43,815 --> 00:34:48,081
But you have to be real nice to me
for the whole rest of the time I'm here.
579
00:34:48,152 --> 00:34:50,313
Promise.
You ready to go to the lake?
580
00:34:50,388 --> 00:34:51,377
Mm-hmm.
581
00:34:51,456 --> 00:34:54,220
- How about your friend, bring him?
- I thought no boys.
582
00:34:54,292 --> 00:34:56,522
If you really want him to come,
Shanna won't mind.
583
00:34:56,594 --> 00:34:59,188
So how about it?
Boys or just us girls?
584
00:34:59,263 --> 00:35:00,958
Mmm, us girls.
585
00:35:01,032 --> 00:35:02,329
Good idea.
586
00:35:04,235 --> 00:35:05,327
Ladies?
587
00:35:07,705 --> 00:35:08,694
Thanks.
588
00:35:09,874 --> 00:35:11,603
Cheers, Butterfly.
589
00:35:14,011 --> 00:35:18,311
"The woods are lovely,
dark, and deep...
590
00:35:18,382 --> 00:35:20,145
"And I have promises to keep,
591
00:35:20,218 --> 00:35:23,619
And miles to go
before I sleep."
592
00:35:23,688 --> 00:35:25,656
Did you hear me, Butterfly?
593
00:35:26,757 --> 00:35:30,659
"Miles to go
before you sleep."
594
00:35:32,563 --> 00:35:34,053
Sorry, Stuntman Burt...
595
00:35:34,132 --> 00:35:35,292
Mike.
596
00:35:35,466 --> 00:35:36,763
Mike.
597
00:35:36,834 --> 00:35:38,825
She already broke off that dance.
598
00:35:38,903 --> 00:35:40,393
Is that true?
599
00:35:42,073 --> 00:35:44,667
Did I miss my chance?
600
00:35:47,411 --> 00:35:49,436
Do I frighten you?
601
00:35:53,885 --> 00:35:55,750
Is it my scar?
602
00:35:57,922 --> 00:35:59,651
It's your car.
603
00:35:59,724 --> 00:36:01,783
Ah, yeah, I know.
604
00:36:01,859 --> 00:36:04,020
Sorry.
605
00:36:04,095 --> 00:36:05,926
It's my mom's car.
606
00:36:08,366 --> 00:36:10,061
Have you been following us?
607
00:36:10,134 --> 00:36:12,830
No, but that's
what I love about Austin...
608
00:36:12,904 --> 00:36:15,168
it's just so damn small.
609
00:36:15,239 --> 00:36:17,867
- You 've seen this guy before?
- I saw him outside of Guero's.
610
00:36:17,942 --> 00:36:20,342
And I saw you outside Guero's, too.
611
00:36:21,646 --> 00:36:24,240
You saw my car,
I saw your legs.
612
00:36:24,315 --> 00:36:27,648
Now, look, I ain't stalking y'all,
but I didn't say I wasn't a wolf.
613
00:36:27,718 --> 00:36:29,686
So you really weren't following us?
614
00:36:29,754 --> 00:36:33,588
I'm not following you, Butterfly.
I just... got lucky.
615
00:36:35,860 --> 00:36:40,160
So, how about that lap dance?
616
00:36:40,231 --> 00:36:41,960
Sorry, it was a one-time only offer,
617
00:36:42,033 --> 00:36:44,399
and she did it
earlier this evening at Antone's.
618
00:36:45,870 --> 00:36:47,895
- No, she didn't.
- How do you know?
619
00:36:47,972 --> 00:36:49,997
I'm good that way.
620
00:36:50,074 --> 00:36:53,874
- Tsk. And you look a little touch�d.
- What's "touch�d"?
621
00:36:53,945 --> 00:36:55,139
Wounded, slightly.
622
00:36:55,213 --> 00:36:56,475
Why should I be wounded?
623
00:36:56,547 --> 00:36:59,516
Because you expected guys
to be pestering you all night,
624
00:36:59,584 --> 00:37:02,348
but from your look I can tell
nobody pestered you at all.
625
00:37:03,588 --> 00:37:06,022
That kind of hurt your feelings
a little bit, didn't it?
626
00:37:07,625 --> 00:37:12,995
There are few things as fetching
as a bruised ego on a beautiful angel.
627
00:37:16,767 --> 00:37:17,756
So...
628
00:37:19,036 --> 00:37:22,870
How about that lap dance?
629
00:37:24,075 --> 00:37:26,703
I think I'm going
to have to give you a rain check.
630
00:37:29,580 --> 00:37:31,810
Well, since you 'll be leaving
in the next couple of days,
631
00:37:31,882 --> 00:37:33,873
that rain check'll be worthless.
632
00:37:36,153 --> 00:37:37,177
But that's okay.
633
00:37:39,056 --> 00:37:41,320
I understand
if I make you uncomfortable.
634
00:37:42,159 --> 00:37:43,990
You 're still a nice girl.
635
00:37:44,061 --> 00:37:45,858
And I still like you.
636
00:37:47,265 --> 00:37:49,426
But I must warn you of something.
637
00:37:50,635 --> 00:37:53,126
You know how people say,
638
00:37:53,204 --> 00:37:54,899
"You 're okay in my book,"
639
00:37:54,972 --> 00:37:58,237
or, "In my book, that's no good."
640
00:37:58,309 --> 00:38:03,975
Well, I actually have a book.
641
00:38:04,048 --> 00:38:07,950
And everybody
I ever meet goes in this book.
642
00:38:08,019 --> 00:38:12,422
And now I've met you,
and you 're goin' in the book.
643
00:38:13,891 --> 00:38:15,688
Except...
644
00:38:15,760 --> 00:38:19,890
I'm afraid I must file you...
645
00:38:19,964 --> 00:38:21,898
under...
646
00:38:21,966 --> 00:38:23,490
"Chicken Shit."
647
00:38:23,567 --> 00:38:25,865
And what if I did it?
648
00:38:25,936 --> 00:38:28,200
Well, I definitely couldn't
file you under "Chicken Shit,"
649
00:38:28,272 --> 00:38:30,365
then, now, could I?
650
00:38:30,441 --> 00:38:31,738
What's your name again?
651
00:38:33,144 --> 00:38:36,045
- Stuntman Mike.
- Well, Stuntman Mike...
652
00:38:36,113 --> 00:38:37,671
I'm Butterfly.
653
00:38:37,748 --> 00:38:42,276
My friend Jungle Julia over here says
that jukebox inside is pretty impressive.
654
00:38:42,353 --> 00:38:44,082
Yeah, it is.
655
00:38:44,155 --> 00:38:45,144
Yeah.
656
00:38:46,190 --> 00:38:48,454
Well, why don't you go
get ready for your lap dance?
657
00:39:02,540 --> 00:39:05,566
What about "kind of cute,
kind of hot, kind of sexy,
658
00:39:05,643 --> 00:39:07,474
"hysterically funny
but not funny-looking guy
659
00:39:07,545 --> 00:39:10,378
who you could fuck"
did you not understand?
660
00:39:10,448 --> 00:39:13,440
##
661
00:39:23,194 --> 00:39:27,460
# Aah. aah #
662
00:39:28,065 --> 00:39:32,468
# Aah. aah #
663
00:39:32,536 --> 00:39:37,496
# Now. down in Mexicali #
664
00:39:37,575 --> 00:39:42,103
# There's a pretty
little place that I love #
665
00:39:42,179 --> 00:39:47,242
# Where the drinks
are hotter than the chili sauce #
666
00:39:47,318 --> 00:39:52,085
# And the boss is a cat named Joe #
667
00:39:52,156 --> 00:39:54,818
# He wears a red bandanna #
668
00:39:54,892 --> 00:39:57,326
# Plays a cool piano #
669
00:39:57,395 --> 00:40:01,957
# In a honky-tonk down in Mexico #
670
00:40:02,032 --> 00:40:05,058
# He wears a purple sash #
671
00:40:05,136 --> 00:40:07,434
# And a black moustache #
672
00:40:07,505 --> 00:40:11,771
# In a honky-tonk down in Mexico #
673
00:40:11,842 --> 00:40:12,831
# Well #
674
00:40:12,910 --> 00:40:16,869
# The first time that I saw him #
675
00:40:16,947 --> 00:40:21,748
# He was a-sitting on a piano stool #
676
00:40:21,819 --> 00:40:26,813
# I said. "Tell me. then.
when does the fun begin?" #
677
00:40:26,891 --> 00:40:31,487
# He just winked his eye
and said. "Man. be cool" #
678
00:40:31,562 --> 00:40:34,258
# He wears a red bandanna #
679
00:40:34,331 --> 00:40:36,856
# Plays a blues piano #
680
00:40:36,934 --> 00:40:41,166
# In a honky-tonk down in Mexico #
681
00:40:41,238 --> 00:40:44,230
# He wears a purple sash #
682
00:40:44,308 --> 00:40:46,742
# And a black moustache #
683
00:40:46,811 --> 00:40:51,009
# In a honky-tonk down in Mexico #
684
00:40:51,081 --> 00:40:52,070
# In Mexico #
685
00:40:52,149 --> 00:40:55,482
# All of a sudden. in walks a chick #
686
00:40:55,553 --> 00:40:56,645
# In Mexico #
687
00:40:56,720 --> 00:40:59,780
# Joe starts playing on a Latin kick #
688
00:40:59,857 --> 00:41:00,846
# In Mexico #
689
00:41:00,925 --> 00:41:04,088
# Around her waist
she wore three fishnets #
690
00:41:04,161 --> 00:41:05,355
# In Mexico #
691
00:41:05,429 --> 00:41:08,023
# She started dancing
with the castanets #
692
00:41:08,098 --> 00:41:09,463
# In Mexico #
693
00:41:09,533 --> 00:41:12,593
# I didn 't know just what to expect #
694
00:41:12,670 --> 00:41:13,659
# In Mexico #
695
00:41:13,737 --> 00:41:16,706
# She threw her arms
around my neck #
696
00:41:16,774 --> 00:41:17,763
# In Mexico #
697
00:41:17,842 --> 00:41:20,606
# We started dancing
all around the floor #
698
00:41:20,678 --> 00:41:21,736
# In Mexico #
699
00:41:21,812 --> 00:41:25,407
# And then she did a dance
I never saw before #
700
00:41:25,483 --> 00:41:30,011
# So if you 're south of the border #
701
00:41:30,087 --> 00:41:34,524
# I mean a-down in a-Mexico #
702
00:41:34,592 --> 00:41:39,291
# And you wanna get straight.
man. don 't hesitate #
703
00:41:39,363 --> 00:41:43,663
# Just look up a cat named Joe #
704
00:41:43,734 --> 00:41:45,964
# He wears a red bandanna #
705
00:41:46,036 --> 00:41:48,664
# Plays a blues piano #
706
00:41:48,739 --> 00:41:53,267
# In a honky-tonk down in Mexico #
707
00:41:53,344 --> 00:41:55,642
# He wears a purple sash #
708
00:41:55,713 --> 00:41:58,307
# And a black moustache #
709
00:41:58,382 --> 00:41:59,849
# In a honky... #
710
00:42:01,685 --> 00:42:02,947
I'm driving.
711
00:42:03,020 --> 00:42:06,148
We're gonna go somewhere else,
gonna go hang out.
712
00:42:06,223 --> 00:42:07,212
Ready to go?
713
00:42:07,291 --> 00:42:08,485
Yeah.
714
00:42:08,559 --> 00:42:10,322
- Bye.
Bye.
715
00:42:13,597 --> 00:42:15,827
I think you got Mike laid tonight.
716
00:42:17,434 --> 00:42:19,595
Lookin' good, Cannonball Run!
717
00:42:20,738 --> 00:42:22,672
He's just giving me a ride.
718
00:42:22,740 --> 00:42:23,764
Oh, no doubt.
719
00:42:23,841 --> 00:42:26,139
Have a nice ride!
720
00:42:27,545 --> 00:42:29,410
Look, double fucks.
721
00:42:33,751 --> 00:42:35,719
I am not gonna fuck him.
722
00:42:35,786 --> 00:42:37,219
I can hear you.
723
00:42:38,656 --> 00:42:42,148
- He's old enough to be my dad.
- I can still hear you.
724
00:42:45,396 --> 00:42:46,556
Bye.
725
00:42:46,630 --> 00:42:47,688
Bye-bye!
726
00:42:54,071 --> 00:42:56,039
Wow, that's fucking scary.
727
00:42:56,106 --> 00:42:58,131
Yeah, well, I wanted it
to be impressive and...
728
00:42:58,208 --> 00:43:00,233
scary tends to impress.
729
00:43:01,679 --> 00:43:02,839
Is it safe?
730
00:43:02,913 --> 00:43:04,881
No, it's better than safe.
731
00:43:04,949 --> 00:43:06,576
It's death-proof.
732
00:43:06,650 --> 00:43:09,175
How do you make a car death-proof?
733
00:43:09,253 --> 00:43:11,050
Well, that's what stuntmen do.
734
00:43:11,121 --> 00:43:13,749
You 've seen a movie where
a car gets into some smash-up
735
00:43:13,824 --> 00:43:16,258
there ain't no way in hell
anybody's walking away from?
736
00:43:16,327 --> 00:43:17,316
Yeah.
737
00:43:17,394 --> 00:43:19,885
Well, how do you
think they accomplish that?
738
00:43:19,964 --> 00:43:21,989
CGI?
739
00:43:22,066 --> 00:43:26,002
Well, unfortunately, Pam, nowadays
more often than not, you 're right.
740
00:43:26,070 --> 00:43:28,334
Tsk. But back
in the all-or-nothin' days...
741
00:43:28,405 --> 00:43:32,205
Vanishing Point days,
the Dirty Mary Crazy Larry days,
742
00:43:32,276 --> 00:43:33,937
the White Line Fever days...
743
00:43:34,011 --> 00:43:36,980
real cars smashing into real cars.
744
00:43:37,047 --> 00:43:39,675
Real dumb people driving 'em.
745
00:43:39,750 --> 00:43:42,776
So, give the stunt team
the car you want to smash up,
746
00:43:42,853 --> 00:43:45,413
they take her and reinforce
that fucker everywhere and...
747
00:43:45,489 --> 00:43:46,478
Voila!
748
00:43:46,557 --> 00:43:49,993
You got yourself
a death-proof automobile.
749
00:43:51,528 --> 00:43:55,123
That makes sense. I just didn't know
you could make a car death-proof.
750
00:43:55,199 --> 00:43:58,999
Well, I can drive this baby into
a brick wall doing 125 miles an hour.
751
00:43:59,837 --> 00:44:01,270
Just for the experience.
752
00:44:08,012 --> 00:44:10,242
Why is your passenger seat in a box?
753
00:44:10,314 --> 00:44:11,838
Well, this is a movie car.
754
00:44:11,915 --> 00:44:15,442
Sometimes when you 're shootin' a crash,
director wants to put a camera in the car...
755
00:44:15,519 --> 00:44:17,680
you know, shoot the crash
from the inside.
756
00:44:17,755 --> 00:44:20,690
That's where you put the camera.
They call it a "crash box."
757
00:44:23,427 --> 00:44:25,088
There you go.
758
00:44:25,162 --> 00:44:27,460
You know, when you
asked to drive me home,
759
00:44:27,531 --> 00:44:29,431
you didn't mention your car
didn't have a passenger seat.
760
00:44:29,500 --> 00:44:32,492
Yeah, well, actually,
I didn't ask to drive you home.
761
00:44:32,569 --> 00:44:34,469
You asked me for a ride,
and I said, "Yes."
762
00:44:34,538 --> 00:44:35,869
But look at the bright side, Pam...
763
00:44:35,939 --> 00:44:38,908
I won't be gettin' fresh,
putting my hand on your knee.
764
00:44:40,711 --> 00:44:42,508
That is a bright side.
765
00:44:43,547 --> 00:44:44,707
I thought so.
766
00:45:10,741 --> 00:45:12,140
Well, Pam...
767
00:45:12,209 --> 00:45:13,471
which way are you going?
768
00:45:13,544 --> 00:45:15,375
- Left or right?
- Right.
769
00:45:15,446 --> 00:45:17,414
Ah, that's too bad.
770
00:45:18,082 --> 00:45:19,106
Why?
771
00:45:19,183 --> 00:45:23,051
Well, because it was a 50/50 shot
on whether you 'd be going left or right.
772
00:45:23,120 --> 00:45:25,247
You see, we're both going left.
773
00:45:25,322 --> 00:45:27,313
You could have just
as easily been going left, too,
774
00:45:27,391 --> 00:45:28,688
and if that was the case,
775
00:45:28,759 --> 00:45:31,421
it would have been a while
before you started getting scared.
776
00:45:31,495 --> 00:45:33,861
But since
you 're going the other way,
777
00:45:33,931 --> 00:45:35,489
I'm afraid...
778
00:45:35,566 --> 00:45:38,967
you 're gonna
have to start getting scared...
779
00:45:39,036 --> 00:45:40,094
immediately.
780
00:45:40,170 --> 00:45:41,262
What the fuck?!
781
00:45:50,781 --> 00:45:52,612
Cocksucking motherfucker!
782
00:45:52,683 --> 00:45:54,275
Just fucking let me out of here!
783
00:45:54,351 --> 00:45:55,909
I'll fucking rip your fucking...
784
00:45:55,986 --> 00:45:57,385
Stop the fucking car!
785
00:45:57,454 --> 00:45:59,285
Why are you being such a shit?
786
00:46:39,563 --> 00:46:41,360
Okay.
787
00:46:41,431 --> 00:46:42,830
Here's the thing.
788
00:46:42,900 --> 00:46:44,993
I get it.
789
00:46:45,068 --> 00:46:47,764
l... I know it's a joke,
and super funny.
790
00:46:48,572 --> 00:46:52,338
Um, but if you just stop right now,
791
00:46:52,409 --> 00:46:54,809
you know, and... and let me out,
792
00:46:54,878 --> 00:46:58,245
I'll never tell anybody
because I know it's a joke.
793
00:46:58,315 --> 00:46:59,646
I know all about jokes.
794
00:46:59,716 --> 00:47:01,149
Ha ha ha!
795
00:47:01,218 --> 00:47:04,654
I promise everything'll be fine.
796
00:47:04,721 --> 00:47:07,212
Just... just... just let me out.
797
00:47:07,291 --> 00:47:08,280
Please?
798
00:47:08,358 --> 00:47:10,121
- And... and... and...
- Hey, Pam!
799
00:47:11,195 --> 00:47:14,687
Remember when I said
this car was death proof?
800
00:47:14,765 --> 00:47:18,030
Well, that wasn't a lie.
801
00:47:18,101 --> 00:47:20,695
This car is 100% death proof.
802
00:47:21,605 --> 00:47:24,574
Only to get the benefit of it, honey...
803
00:47:24,641 --> 00:47:27,633
you really need to be sittin' in my seat.
804
00:48:05,082 --> 00:48:08,677
Now I gotta catch me
my other girlfriends.
805
00:48:23,166 --> 00:48:24,155
No, no, no, no, no, no.
806
00:48:24,234 --> 00:48:27,465
It's Dave Dee, Dozy,
Beaky, Mick and Tich.
807
00:48:28,372 --> 00:48:29,930
So, you got it?
808
00:48:30,007 --> 00:48:32,874
Thanks, honey.
You 're gonna play it next song, right?
809
00:48:34,111 --> 00:48:35,976
Good boy.
810
00:48:37,447 --> 00:48:39,108
Growl!
811
00:48:39,182 --> 00:48:41,241
Bye-bye.
812
00:48:41,318 --> 00:48:42,751
Who do you want to hear?
813
00:48:42,819 --> 00:48:44,719
Dave Dee, Dozy,
Beaky, Mick, and Tich.
814
00:48:44,788 --> 00:48:46,050
Who?
815
00:48:46,123 --> 00:48:49,752
Dave Dee, Dozy,
Beaky, Mick, and Tich.
816
00:48:49,826 --> 00:48:51,225
Who the fuck are they?
817
00:48:51,295 --> 00:48:54,093
For your information,
Pete Townshend, at one point,
818
00:48:54,164 --> 00:48:55,927
almost quit The Who,
and if he had,
819
00:48:55,999 --> 00:48:57,660
he would have ended up in this group,
820
00:48:57,734 --> 00:49:01,465
thus making it Dave Dee, Dozy,
Beaky, Mick, Tich, and Pete.
821
00:49:01,538 --> 00:49:03,096
And if you ask me,
he should have.
822
00:49:04,241 --> 00:49:06,573
That's my boy!
823
00:49:06,643 --> 00:49:09,806
##
824
00:49:19,656 --> 00:49:21,590
# Hold tight. count to three #
825
00:49:21,658 --> 00:49:23,717
# Gotta stay close by me #
826
00:49:23,794 --> 00:49:25,557
# And hold tight. sing and shout #
827
00:49:25,629 --> 00:49:27,494
# Just ride my roundabout #
828
00:49:27,564 --> 00:49:29,555
# And hold tight. shut your eyes #
829
00:49:29,633 --> 00:49:34,730
# Girl. you suit me for size... #
830
00:49:34,805 --> 00:49:38,571
# Forget the other guys #
831
00:49:38,642 --> 00:49:42,078
# You 'll never fall
each time you call #
832
00:49:42,145 --> 00:49:46,013
# Hold tight. hold tight #
833
00:49:46,083 --> 00:49:51,851
# Hold tight... #
834
00:49:51,922 --> 00:49:56,018
# Hold tight. make me feel.
what you say is for real #
835
00:49:56,093 --> 00:49:57,958
# And hold tight. carousel #
836
00:49:58,028 --> 00:49:59,620
# Girl. you 'll soon ring my bell #
837
00:49:59,696 --> 00:50:01,789
# And hold tight. we will fly #
838
00:50:01,865 --> 00:50:06,962
# Swinging low. swinging high... #
839
00:50:07,037 --> 00:50:10,871
# We're gonna make the sky #
840
00:50:10,941 --> 00:50:12,772
# You 'll never fall #
841
00:50:40,570 --> 00:50:43,903
##
842
00:50:55,218 --> 00:50:57,652
I want to hear
this part of the song louder!
843
00:51:45,068 --> 00:51:46,729
Do you remember anything?
844
00:51:48,672 --> 00:51:50,970
Uh... l... I don't remember.
845
00:51:54,544 --> 00:51:55,977
Doctor Block.
846
00:52:02,853 --> 00:52:05,447
Self-restraints to Room 310.
847
00:52:05,522 --> 00:52:07,922
Self-restraints to Room 310.
848
00:52:09,126 --> 00:52:14,428
Well. What's the patient's
prognosis, Dr. Block?
849
00:52:14,498 --> 00:52:16,728
I don't really see
it's any of your business.
850
00:52:16,800 --> 00:52:18,631
Come on now, Sis.
851
00:52:18,702 --> 00:52:21,000
You just tell us.
852
00:52:21,071 --> 00:52:22,402
How bad is he?
853
00:52:27,077 --> 00:52:28,806
He got banged up real good.
854
00:52:28,879 --> 00:52:33,282
Busted nose, broken collarbone,
smashed up his left index finger.
855
00:52:33,350 --> 00:52:34,544
Is that it?
856
00:52:36,353 --> 00:52:38,082
He was real lucky.
857
00:52:40,290 --> 00:52:42,053
That'll be all?
858
00:52:42,125 --> 00:52:45,424
Well, that's more than enough,
and I wanna thank you, Dr. Block.
859
00:52:49,266 --> 00:52:50,756
Son of a bitch.
860
00:52:52,302 --> 00:52:53,894
So, Pop.
861
00:52:53,970 --> 00:52:55,494
What do you think?
862
00:52:55,572 --> 00:52:57,403
Well, Son Number One,
863
00:52:57,474 --> 00:53:01,638
what I think is so goddamn ghoulish
I hesitate to speak it out loud.
864
00:53:02,679 --> 00:53:04,943
Well, give it a shot.
865
00:53:05,015 --> 00:53:08,041
Well, what we have here
is a case of vehicular homicide.
866
00:53:08,118 --> 00:53:10,848
That ol' boy in there
murdered them pretty little gals.
867
00:53:10,921 --> 00:53:14,687
I mean, he used a car, not a hatchet,
but they're dead just the same.
868
00:53:16,259 --> 00:53:19,285
Well, what are you gonna do?
869
00:53:19,362 --> 00:53:21,057
Not a goddamn thing.
870
00:53:21,131 --> 00:53:23,395
D.A. says there ain't no crime here.
871
00:53:24,301 --> 00:53:29,238
Every one of them gals was swimming
in alcohol and floatin' on weed,
872
00:53:29,306 --> 00:53:33,174
and old Hooper in there
came out clean as a whistle.
873
00:53:33,243 --> 00:53:37,646
Now, you actually think that he
premeditatively murdered them gals?
874
00:53:37,714 --> 00:53:39,477
Well, I can't prove it.
875
00:53:39,549 --> 00:53:42,712
But since thinkin' don't cost nothin',
I can think it, and I do.
876
00:53:42,786 --> 00:53:46,153
Yeah, but Pop, he got
pretty banged up himself.
877
00:53:46,223 --> 00:53:48,748
Well, hell yeah,
he got banged up, but goddamn...
878
00:53:48,825 --> 00:53:51,555
I mean, them pretty little gals in there
look like a goddamn giant
879
00:53:51,628 --> 00:53:53,323
chewed 'em up and spit 'em out.
880
00:53:53,396 --> 00:53:54,761
Did any of 'em survive?
881
00:53:54,831 --> 00:53:56,731
Shit.
882
00:53:56,800 --> 00:53:59,268
Two tons of metal,
200 miles an hour,
883
00:53:59,336 --> 00:54:01,736
flesh and bone
and plain old Newton...
884
00:54:01,805 --> 00:54:03,898
they all princess died.
885
00:54:11,014 --> 00:54:12,413
Why?
886
00:54:12,482 --> 00:54:16,782
Well, I'd guesstimate
it's a sex thing.
887
00:54:16,853 --> 00:54:18,844
The only way I can figure it.
888
00:54:18,922 --> 00:54:24,053
High-velocity impact,
twisted metal, busted glass,
889
00:54:24,127 --> 00:54:27,187
all four souls taken
exactly the same time.
890
00:54:28,531 --> 00:54:32,524
Probably the only way that diabolical
degenerate can shoot his goo.
891
00:54:33,703 --> 00:54:36,228
Yeah, I think the only thing
we can dream of getting that bastard on
892
00:54:36,306 --> 00:54:39,798
is vehicular manslaughter
for the hitchhiker in the death box.
893
00:54:39,876 --> 00:54:42,743
That was just plain old,
goddamn reckless endangerment.
894
00:54:42,812 --> 00:54:45,804
But I got me a goddamn bartender
895
00:54:45,882 --> 00:54:49,511
gonna testify that ol' Stuntman
Mike didn't drink a drop all night.
896
00:54:50,320 --> 00:54:53,153
And his passenger
was left stranded by her date,
897
00:54:53,223 --> 00:54:56,954
in the goddamn rain, no less,
and she asked him for the fucking ride.
898
00:54:57,027 --> 00:55:00,861
Now, on paper, this is gonna look
like he was just trying to help her out.
899
00:55:00,930 --> 00:55:03,228
I mean, that's the way
the jury's gonna see it.
900
00:55:03,300 --> 00:55:05,495
So, what are you gonna do, Pop?
901
00:55:05,568 --> 00:55:06,660
Tsk.
902
00:55:06,736 --> 00:55:09,671
Well, I could take it
upon myself to work the case,
903
00:55:08,237 --> 00:55:09,602
you know, in my off hours.
904
00:55:12,213 --> 00:55:15,376
Search for evidence,
you know, prove my theory.
905
00:55:15,449 --> 00:55:16,711
Alert authorities.
906
00:55:16,784 --> 00:55:20,379
Dog that rotten son of a bitch...
wherever he goes, I go.
907
00:55:20,454 --> 00:55:25,585
Or I could spend the same
goddamn amount of time and energy
908
00:55:25,660 --> 00:55:28,595
following the NASCAR circuit.
909
00:55:28,663 --> 00:55:30,824
Hmm. I've thought about it a lot.
910
00:55:30,898 --> 00:55:34,356
I think I'd have a hell
of a lot happier life if I did the latter.
911
00:55:34,435 --> 00:55:35,424
And just because I can't
912
00:55:35,503 --> 00:55:39,735
punish Old Frankenstein
in there for what he's done,
913
00:55:39,807 --> 00:55:42,605
I'm gonna tell you
like the Lord told John...
914
00:55:42,677 --> 00:55:44,668
if he ever does it again,
915
00:55:44,745 --> 00:55:48,044
I can make goddamn sure
he don't do it in Texas.
916
00:55:48,349 --> 00:55:51,807
##
917
00:55:59,326 --> 00:56:01,521
# You know you 're sliding down #
918
00:56:02,663 --> 00:56:04,563
# Against your heart #
919
00:56:06,033 --> 00:56:07,625
# Yeah. you got one #
920
00:56:11,038 --> 00:56:13,632
# Just close your eyes #
921
00:56:14,709 --> 00:56:17,109
# So you can see #
922
00:56:17,912 --> 00:56:20,244
# So you can see #
923
00:56:21,115 --> 00:56:22,810
# No. baby. I don 't care #
924
00:56:22,883 --> 00:56:25,716
# What they say. it's so easy #
925
00:56:29,824 --> 00:56:32,054
# No. baby. I don 't care #
926
00:56:32,126 --> 00:56:34,720
# What they say. it's so easy #
927
00:56:38,432 --> 00:56:40,024
# Yeah. it's comin ' on #
928
00:56:42,069 --> 00:56:44,162
# It 's getting sweeter #
929
00:56:45,272 --> 00:56:46,967
# And sweeter #
930
00:56:50,311 --> 00:56:52,779
# If you 're gonna drown #
931
00:56:54,081 --> 00:56:56,345
# Then do it the right way #
932
00:56:57,952 --> 00:56:59,613
# The right way #
933
00:57:01,355 --> 00:57:06,315
# I don 't care what they say. it's so easy #
934
00:57:09,864 --> 00:57:12,890
# I don 't care what they say. it's so... #
935
00:57:14,034 --> 00:57:17,197
Are you on the same floor as him?
No, he's on the fourth.
936
00:57:17,271 --> 00:57:19,603
- And who's in whose room?
- He's in mine.
937
00:57:19,673 --> 00:57:20,935
And so what happened then?
938
00:57:21,008 --> 00:57:25,274
We made out for about ten minutes,
and then I sent him off to his room.
939
00:57:25,346 --> 00:57:28,941
- So how's the Rock as a kisser?
- Mm, he's damn good.
940
00:57:29,016 --> 00:57:31,814
He's got them mushy lips,
smooth fingertips.
941
00:57:31,886 --> 00:57:33,786
Mm, I love them mushy lips.
942
00:57:33,854 --> 00:57:36,982
He's a big guy, so he spins me around
so my back is up against him,
943
00:57:37,057 --> 00:57:39,617
takes his big hand
and puts it on my throat,
944
00:57:39,693 --> 00:57:44,153
tilts my head back and leans over me,
kisses me from behind.
945
00:57:44,231 --> 00:57:45,630
Damn, that sounds sexy!
946
00:57:45,699 --> 00:57:47,223
It was sexy.
947
00:57:47,301 --> 00:57:51,203
But then that was it?
You sent him off? How'd he take it?
948
00:57:51,272 --> 00:57:52,967
Wait a minute, what are we doing here?
949
00:57:53,040 --> 00:57:56,771
If I'm gonna power through and pick up
Zo� at the airport, I need coffee.
950
00:57:56,844 --> 00:58:00,678
Since you 're getting that, can you get
some more vodka and sugar-free Red Bull?
951
00:58:03,050 --> 00:58:04,347
We didn't know you were awake.
952
00:58:04,418 --> 00:58:06,113
I'm not awake. I'm asleep.
953
00:58:06,187 --> 00:58:09,281
But get some more vodka
and some sugar-free Red Bull anyway.
954
00:58:10,057 --> 00:58:11,524
And some Red Apple Tans.
955
00:58:11,592 --> 00:58:14,060
Damn, I didn't stop
to get you bitches groceries.
956
00:58:16,297 --> 00:58:18,731
- You remember how to get to the airport?
Uh-huh.
957
00:58:18,799 --> 00:58:21,632
Then you should get behind the wheel,
'cause you gonna drive.
958
00:58:23,504 --> 00:58:24,994
Motherfuckers.
959
00:58:41,789 --> 00:58:43,723
They ain't got sugar-free Red Bull.
960
00:58:43,791 --> 00:58:46,385
They got regular Red Bull
and sugar-free G.O. juice.
961
00:58:46,460 --> 00:58:49,190
G.O.
G.O.!
962
00:59:14,455 --> 00:59:20,587
# It's not the way you kiss
that says you 're mine #
963
00:59:23,964 --> 00:59:28,424
# Many, many, many nights go by #
964
00:59:28,502 --> 00:59:34,270
# I sit alone at home and cry over you #
965
00:59:34,341 --> 00:59:37,538
# What can I do #
966
00:59:37,611 --> 00:59:43,072
# Don't want nobody, nobody #
967
00:59:43,150 --> 00:59:46,449
# 'Cause, baby, it's you #
968
00:59:55,930 --> 00:59:59,491
# Is it true what they say #
969
00:59:59,566 --> 01:00:03,730
# All about you #
970
01:00:05,706 --> 01:00:11,167
# They say you 'll never
ever never be true #
971
01:00:13,781 --> 01:00:18,445
# It doesn't matter what they say #
972
01:00:18,519 --> 01:00:22,080
# I know I'm gonna
love you any old way #
973
01:00:22,156 --> 01:00:25,125
# What would I do #
974
01:00:25,192 --> 01:00:28,389
# Without you #
975
01:00:28,462 --> 01:00:30,794
# I don't want nobody... #
976
01:00:31,065 --> 01:00:33,898
Where the hell are my keys?
Here they are.
977
01:00:35,269 --> 01:00:37,897
Sorry, I didn't mean to give
you a concert there.
978
01:00:37,972 --> 01:00:40,099
No, it wasn't you.
979
01:00:40,174 --> 01:00:42,870
That guy bumped into my feet
when he walked by.
980
01:00:44,311 --> 01:00:47,144
I don't know why,
but that kind of creeped me out.
981
01:01:03,030 --> 01:01:06,090
# I don 't care
what they saying to me #
982
01:01:12,740 --> 01:01:14,264
Little dick.
983
01:01:16,110 --> 01:01:17,441
Clearly.
984
01:01:19,046 --> 01:01:24,074
Since I'm up,
I might as well hit the ATM.
985
01:01:25,419 --> 01:01:27,478
Get me a fuckin' smoke.
986
01:02:51,672 --> 01:02:53,435
What?
987
01:02:53,507 --> 01:02:55,475
Did you just see the...
988
01:02:55,542 --> 01:02:56,531
What?
989
01:02:58,812 --> 01:02:59,938
Nothing, honey.
990
01:03:23,570 --> 01:03:24,559
Y'ello.
991
01:03:24,638 --> 01:03:25,969
It's me.
992
01:03:26,039 --> 01:03:27,336
Miss me?
993
01:03:28,842 --> 01:03:31,436
You best get your ass
off Kim's car.
994
01:03:31,512 --> 01:03:35,278
- I've seen Kim sit on it before.
- Her ass ain't your ass.
995
01:03:35,349 --> 01:03:39,786
Okay. So, I think I'm in
this month's issue of Allure.
996
01:03:43,357 --> 01:03:44,847
You got Allure?
997
01:03:44,925 --> 01:03:46,825
Magazines by the window.
998
01:04:01,208 --> 01:04:02,869
Here you are!
999
01:04:05,879 --> 01:04:07,574
You hot mama, you.
1000
01:04:07,648 --> 01:04:09,479
See you in a second.
1001
01:04:09,550 --> 01:04:12,644
$3.85... out of 20.
1002
01:04:16,757 --> 01:04:19,749
And you get 16 and change back.
Thank you very much.
1003
01:04:22,129 --> 01:04:25,360
You know, I got other fashion magazines
for sale behind the counter.
1004
01:04:27,901 --> 01:04:30,335
No, that's okay.
This'll be all.
1005
01:04:30,404 --> 01:04:31,564
Thought I'd ask.
1006
01:04:31,638 --> 01:04:33,401
- Thanks anyway.
- Have a good one.
1007
01:04:36,543 --> 01:04:39,205
I got this month's issue
of Italian Vogue.
1008
01:04:44,451 --> 01:04:45,713
This month's?
1009
01:04:47,554 --> 01:04:49,818
Listen to this.
1010
01:04:49,890 --> 01:04:54,623
The Circle A clerk has
this month's issue of Italian Vogue.
1011
01:04:54,695 --> 01:04:55,855
- No way.
- Way!
1012
01:04:55,929 --> 01:04:58,420
I can't believe fuckin' Circle A
carries Italian Vogue.
1013
01:04:58,498 --> 01:05:00,932
It doesn't. It's his own personal copy.
1014
01:05:01,001 --> 01:05:03,265
He'll let it go for 27 bucks.
1015
01:05:03,337 --> 01:05:05,202
27 bucks?
1016
01:05:05,272 --> 01:05:07,706
What the fuck do you care?
We're talking about per diem here.
1017
01:05:07,774 --> 01:05:10,675
We found an issue of Italian Vogue
in Lebanon, Tennessee.
1018
01:05:10,744 --> 01:05:12,678
We're lucky he's not asking
for fuckin' Krugerrands.
1019
01:05:12,746 --> 01:05:14,873
I'm getting it, and we're
splitting it three ways.
1020
01:05:14,948 --> 01:05:16,210
What, me, you, and Kim?
1021
01:05:16,283 --> 01:05:18,114
Kim doesn't give
a shit about Italian Vogue.
1022
01:05:18,185 --> 01:05:21,848
but Brandy'll come in with us,
and if she won't, Tisla, her sister, will.
1023
01:05:22,689 --> 01:05:25,658
Okay, but if anybody tears out
any sheets I want,
1024
01:05:25,726 --> 01:05:29,093
you gotta make color Xeroxes
of those pages, and I'm not talking Kinko's.
1025
01:05:29,162 --> 01:05:33,189
You take it to the art department
and have them do it fuckin' right.
1026
01:05:50,917 --> 01:05:53,215
Whoo!
1027
01:05:56,857 --> 01:05:58,085
Oh, my God!
1028
01:06:06,233 --> 01:06:07,632
Got it!
1029
01:06:17,244 --> 01:06:19,269
...the actress...
1030
01:06:30,757 --> 01:06:32,247
Oh, boy.
1031
01:06:35,228 --> 01:06:37,253
Your timing couldn't be better, Zo�.
1032
01:06:37,331 --> 01:06:41,927
It just so happens we're all three
off-duty for the next three days.
1033
01:06:42,002 --> 01:06:44,470
Fuckin' hell! How does that happen?
1034
01:06:44,538 --> 01:06:47,530
I'm doing Lindsay Lohan's makeup,
and she's off for the next three days.
1035
01:06:47,607 --> 01:06:50,474
There's no stunts being filmed
during that time so Kim's free,
1036
01:06:50,544 --> 01:06:54,640
and Lee's on a will-notify
for the four days.
1037
01:06:54,715 --> 01:06:56,273
So how's the shoot going?
1038
01:06:56,350 --> 01:06:58,409
Great. We're having the best time.
1039
01:06:58,485 --> 01:07:00,578
The director, Cecil Evans, is so fun.
1040
01:07:00,654 --> 01:07:03,885
We're making the coolest movie
and partying all the time.
1041
01:07:03,957 --> 01:07:07,552
Hell, yeah. The next job
after this one is definitely gonna suck.
1042
01:07:07,627 --> 01:07:09,527
So let's hear it, ladies.
1043
01:07:09,596 --> 01:07:11,996
Set romances! Who's getting it off?
1044
01:07:12,065 --> 01:07:14,693
That would be Lee and Toolbox.
1045
01:07:14,768 --> 01:07:17,794
Oh, Toolbox!
Name sounds promising.
1046
01:07:17,871 --> 01:07:19,998
- He's a grip.
- What he is is a pervert.
1047
01:07:20,073 --> 01:07:22,371
Well, he just keeps sounding
better and better.
1048
01:07:23,643 --> 01:07:24,632
What's his perversion?
1049
01:07:26,747 --> 01:07:29,181
He likes to watch me pee.
1050
01:07:29,750 --> 01:07:34,210
# Lee is sitting on a toilet
and Toolbox is watching her pee #
1051
01:07:34,287 --> 01:07:36,346
# P-l-S-S-l-N-G #
1052
01:07:36,423 --> 01:07:37,412
Ooh!
1053
01:07:37,724 --> 01:07:39,453
Yeah, but not no more.
1054
01:07:39,526 --> 01:07:41,756
Now she's getting it on
with the Rock.
1055
01:07:41,828 --> 01:07:43,693
You had a one-off with the Rock?
1056
01:07:43,764 --> 01:07:46,198
Well, not the real Rock.
He's this electrician named Bruce.
1057
01:07:46,266 --> 01:07:50,100
He looks like the Rock,
so we all just call him the Rock.
1058
01:07:50,170 --> 01:07:51,831
Oh, yeah, this is an all-star crew.
1059
01:07:51,905 --> 01:07:55,500
We got a guy who looks like Nic Cage
and Pee Wee Herman, too.
1060
01:07:55,575 --> 01:07:58,009
Kim, dick department.
Let's hear it!
1061
01:07:58,078 --> 01:08:01,445
Mm-mmm, no dick this trip.
I got a man.
1062
01:08:01,515 --> 01:08:04,746
- How long have you had this boyfriend?
- About three months.
1063
01:08:04,818 --> 01:08:06,445
Who'd you steal him from?
1064
01:08:06,520 --> 01:08:07,817
Nobody!
1065
01:08:07,888 --> 01:08:10,448
Kim!
- Wha... what?
1066
01:08:10,524 --> 01:08:12,185
He totally had a girlfriend.
1067
01:08:12,259 --> 01:08:15,888
All of Kim's boyfriends start out
as somebody else's boyfriend.
1068
01:08:15,962 --> 01:08:18,055
I did not steal him!
1069
01:08:18,131 --> 01:08:23,262
I didn't steal any of them;
they just... jumped ship.
1070
01:08:25,505 --> 01:08:29,271
- So what's your story, Abernathy?
- Oh, Abbie's got the big Kahuna.
1071
01:08:29,342 --> 01:08:32,072
I had a set crush on Cecil.
1072
01:08:32,145 --> 01:08:35,478
Set crush? Nigga, please.
You were his set wife!
1073
01:08:35,549 --> 01:08:37,779
"Were" and "had" being
the key words, here.
1074
01:08:37,851 --> 01:08:40,547
Bitch, you two are still
into each other and you know it.
1075
01:08:40,620 --> 01:08:45,683
Yeah, well, if he's so in love with me,
why did he fuck Darryl Hannah's stand-in?
1076
01:08:49,262 --> 01:08:52,925
Yes, men are dogs.
Oh, it's so funny!
1077
01:08:52,999 --> 01:08:54,466
Oh, it's so funny!
1078
01:08:54,534 --> 01:08:57,059
Stop acting all hurt.
Your ass just mad.
1079
01:08:57,137 --> 01:08:58,934
Yeah, he's a stand-in fucker.
1080
01:08:59,005 --> 01:09:01,974
You need to get over that shit.
That was two weeks ago.
1081
01:09:02,042 --> 01:09:04,977
Oh, well, now you put it like that...
1082
01:09:05,846 --> 01:09:08,246
Oh, I haven't told you the best part.
1083
01:09:08,315 --> 01:09:11,409
He fucked her on my birthday.
1084
01:09:11,485 --> 01:09:14,318
Oh, that's a horse of a different color.
1085
01:09:14,387 --> 01:09:17,254
- Thank you.
- Did he know it was your birthday?
1086
01:09:17,324 --> 01:09:20,054
I mean, he's the director.
He's kind of busy.
1087
01:09:20,126 --> 01:09:24,563
He ate a piece of my birthday cake,
and he got me a present.
1088
01:09:24,631 --> 01:09:26,622
- Wow.
- Yeah... I think he knew.
1089
01:09:28,301 --> 01:09:29,791
What did he get you?
1090
01:09:33,373 --> 01:09:34,840
He made me a tape.
1091
01:09:35,008 --> 01:09:36,635
He made you a tape?
1092
01:09:36,710 --> 01:09:38,940
Wait, he didn't burn you a CD?
1093
01:09:39,012 --> 01:09:40,377
He made you a tape?
1094
01:09:40,447 --> 01:09:43,439
- Yeah.
- Oh, that is so romantic!
1095
01:09:43,517 --> 01:09:46,611
Yes, I know what you 're gonna say,
so don't even go there.
1096
01:09:46,686 --> 01:09:48,711
This sounds like the test
of true love to me.
1097
01:09:48,788 --> 01:09:52,485
Look, I know you guys like him.
He's likeable.
1098
01:09:52,559 --> 01:09:55,153
But he fucked another woman
on my birthday.
1099
01:09:55,228 --> 01:09:57,594
How can you not be on my side?
1100
01:09:57,664 --> 01:09:59,154
I admit, that sounds bad.
1101
01:09:59,232 --> 01:10:00,494
It is bad!
1102
01:10:00,567 --> 01:10:03,434
It just sounds like there's
a little more to it than that.
1103
01:10:03,503 --> 01:10:04,663
Were you two fucking?
1104
01:10:04,738 --> 01:10:06,228
Hell, no.
1105
01:10:06,306 --> 01:10:08,171
Hello, is your name Abernathy?
1106
01:10:08,241 --> 01:10:09,230
Sorry.
1107
01:10:09,309 --> 01:10:12,870
The answer to your question
is no, of course not.
1108
01:10:12,946 --> 01:10:15,938
What do you mean "No, of course not"?
1109
01:10:16,016 --> 01:10:19,008
The reason Cecil hasn't had
a girlfriend in six years
1110
01:10:19,085 --> 01:10:22,384
is because girls will fuck him,
and if you fuck Cecil,
1111
01:10:22,455 --> 01:10:24,719
you don't become one
of his girlfriends...
1112
01:10:24,791 --> 01:10:27,726
not to say I want to be his girlfriend,
1113
01:10:27,794 --> 01:10:32,993
but if I did want to be his girlfriend,
if I fucked him, I wouldn't be.
1114
01:10:33,066 --> 01:10:38,732
I'd be one of his regulars,
and I'm getting too fuckin' old for that shit.
1115
01:10:38,805 --> 01:10:42,002
- Have you let him do anything?
- Yes!
1116
01:10:43,710 --> 01:10:45,610
I've let him give me a foot massage,
1117
01:10:45,679 --> 01:10:49,547
and when we go to the movies,
I've let him hold my hand.
1118
01:10:49,616 --> 01:10:52,346
Bitch, you might be actin'
like you 12 years old,
1119
01:10:52,419 --> 01:10:53,943
but he just acting like a man.
1120
01:10:54,020 --> 01:10:56,113
You need to break
that nigga off a piece.
1121
01:10:56,189 --> 01:10:57,520
Let me get this straight...
1122
01:10:58,558 --> 01:11:01,857
you 're not fucking him,
you 're not sucking him,
1123
01:11:01,928 --> 01:11:05,796
you 're not giving him any tongue,
but Darryl Hannah's stand-in is?
1124
01:11:05,865 --> 01:11:08,026
Can we just take my sex life
off the table?
1125
01:11:08,101 --> 01:11:11,468
Actually, it was Cecil's sex life
that was on the table...
1126
01:11:11,538 --> 01:11:13,199
and your lack of one.
1127
01:11:19,012 --> 01:11:21,378
Fuck both of you
and your little high-five.
1128
01:11:21,448 --> 01:11:25,885
Before you can claim a nigga,
you got to claim a nigga,
1129
01:11:25,952 --> 01:11:28,853
and you can start by giving
that motherfucker a hand job
1130
01:11:28,922 --> 01:11:30,651
in the back of the van
on Tuesday.
1131
01:11:30,724 --> 01:11:31,884
I'm not gonna do that!
1132
01:11:31,958 --> 01:11:34,518
I know you won't!
But you know who will...
1133
01:11:34,594 --> 01:11:37,563
the bitch that ends up living
in that big-ass mansion of his.
1134
01:11:37,631 --> 01:11:40,691
I haven't entirely agreed
with everything Kim's said,
1135
01:11:40,767 --> 01:11:44,567
but it is true if you 've stretched it out
like you have with Cecil
1136
01:11:44,638 --> 01:11:49,200
and you suddenly get dirty on them,
it blows their mind.
1137
01:11:50,543 --> 01:11:53,979
So Zo�, Kim, and I are
in the Philippines at an outdoor rave.
1138
01:11:54,047 --> 01:11:57,380
What were you working on?
- Three Kicks to the Head. Part Three.
1139
01:11:57,450 --> 01:12:00,886
And, admittedly,
we're a little fucked up.
1140
01:12:00,954 --> 01:12:03,218
Cheers to that.
- Word.
1141
01:12:03,923 --> 01:12:05,151
Cheers.
1142
01:12:05,225 --> 01:12:06,749
So Zo�...
1143
01:12:07,894 --> 01:12:11,762
the genius, wants to take
a picture of me.
1144
01:12:12,899 --> 01:12:16,300
It's dark as hell,
and you can't see shit.
1145
01:12:16,369 --> 01:12:19,998
So she's got her camera
and keeps saying, "Step back a little!"
1146
01:12:20,073 --> 01:12:21,131
So I do.
1147
01:12:21,207 --> 01:12:23,539
Then "A little fu -ther!"
1148
01:12:23,610 --> 01:12:28,274
So I step back a little fu -ther.
Then "A little more!" So I do.
1149
01:12:28,348 --> 01:12:34,287
Then I realize I'm at the edge
of a seven-foot concrete ditch...
1150
01:12:34,354 --> 01:12:36,788
...with God knows how many rocks
1151
01:12:36,856 --> 01:12:41,088
and broken bottles and rats in it,
and if I fell in that fucking thing,
1152
01:12:41,161 --> 01:12:43,152
I probably would have broken my neck.
1153
01:12:43,229 --> 01:12:46,960
So I am yelling at her:
"Zo�, you almost killed me!"
1154
01:12:48,635 --> 01:12:52,662
So we laugh about it
and walk a little further,
1155
01:12:52,739 --> 01:12:55,264
and Zo� starts fuckin' around.
1156
01:12:55,341 --> 01:12:59,437
And... bam! ...if she doesn't fall
in the fucking ditch!
1157
01:13:00,914 --> 01:13:02,677
Nice.
1158
01:13:02,749 --> 01:13:05,411
Thank you. Yep. Thank you.
1159
01:13:06,519 --> 01:13:08,987
I remember taking a step
and looking down,
1160
01:13:09,055 --> 01:13:12,616
just as I'm thinking, "There's that ditch
Abbie was talking about."
1161
01:13:12,692 --> 01:13:15,058
Bam! I'm in the fucking ditch, you know.
1162
01:13:15,128 --> 01:13:16,493
What happened?
1163
01:13:16,563 --> 01:13:18,929
What, with Zo�, the cat?
1164
01:13:18,998 --> 01:13:20,022
Nothing.
1165
01:13:20,100 --> 01:13:24,093
If I fell in that fuckin' thing, they would
have had to helicopter me out of there.
1166
01:13:24,170 --> 01:13:26,468
Zo� just lands on her feet.
1167
01:13:26,539 --> 01:13:30,669
But then later I started feeling
a little bad about myself...
1168
01:13:30,744 --> 01:13:35,807
Zo� falls in the ditch and it's nothing.
We're laughing about it.
1169
01:13:35,882 --> 01:13:40,216
If I fell in that fucking thing,
I probably would have been paralyzed.
1170
01:13:40,286 --> 01:13:42,550
Oh, honey, you can't think like that.
1171
01:13:42,622 --> 01:13:46,456
We all have our individual talents,
and that just happens to be one of Zo�'s.
1172
01:13:46,526 --> 01:13:51,020
Well, physically speaking,
Zo� is amazing.
1173
01:13:51,097 --> 01:13:53,759
I mean, agility, reflexes, nimbleness?
1174
01:13:54,601 --> 01:13:57,729
There's few human beings that can fuck
with Zo� on that front.
1175
01:13:57,804 --> 01:13:59,829
Kim, I like you too.
1176
01:14:00,774 --> 01:14:05,234
Having said that, before you get
too envious of Zo�'s prowess,
1177
01:14:05,311 --> 01:14:08,041
you 're missing the most
important part of that story.
1178
01:14:08,114 --> 01:14:11,641
You didn't fall in the ditch.
Zo� did.
1179
01:14:11,718 --> 01:14:15,620
Zo� even knew there was a ditch there
because you told her,
1180
01:14:15,688 --> 01:14:17,588
and she still fell in.
1181
01:14:17,657 --> 01:14:20,751
So Lee's right.
We all have our talents.
1182
01:14:20,827 --> 01:14:23,921
Hey, I resemble that remark.
1183
01:14:27,167 --> 01:14:29,260
So Kim, you still pack a Roscoe?
1184
01:14:32,539 --> 01:14:34,370
Check it out, bitch.
1185
01:14:34,440 --> 01:14:36,806
- Ooh, nice one, mate.
- I know this.
1186
01:14:36,876 --> 01:14:38,070
What's a Roscoe?
1187
01:14:38,144 --> 01:14:39,441
Roscoe's a pistol.
1188
01:14:40,280 --> 01:14:42,214
- You carry a gun?
- Uh-huh.
1189
01:14:42,282 --> 01:14:44,273
You have a license to carry?
1190
01:14:44,350 --> 01:14:48,252
Yeah, when I became a Secret Service
agent, they gave me a license.
1191
01:14:48,988 --> 01:14:50,785
Oh, I didn't know you were...
1192
01:14:53,560 --> 01:14:57,621
Okay, I didn't say it, all right?
Stop looking at me. God.
1193
01:14:58,731 --> 01:15:00,665
Did you know Kim carried a gun?
1194
01:15:00,733 --> 01:15:04,794
Yes. Now, do I approve? No.
1195
01:15:04,871 --> 01:15:06,896
Do I know? Yes.
1196
01:15:06,973 --> 01:15:10,636
Look, I don't know what
futuristic utopia you live in,
1197
01:15:10,710 --> 01:15:13,577
but the world I live in,
a bitch need a gun.
1198
01:15:13,646 --> 01:15:17,241
You can't get around the fact
that people who carry guns
1199
01:15:17,317 --> 01:15:20,047
tend to get shot
more than people who don't.
1200
01:15:20,119 --> 01:15:23,919
And you can't get around the fact
that if I go down to the laundry room
1201
01:15:23,990 --> 01:15:26,891
at midnight enough times,
I might get my ass raped.
1202
01:15:26,960 --> 01:15:28,655
Don't do your laundry at midnight.
1203
01:15:28,728 --> 01:15:32,425
Fuck that! I wanna do my laundry
whenever the fuck I want to.
1204
01:15:32,498 --> 01:15:36,764
There are other things you can carry
other than a gun. Pepper spray.
1205
01:15:36,836 --> 01:15:41,296
Uh, motherfucker trying to rape me,
I don't want to give him a skin rash.
1206
01:15:41,374 --> 01:15:43,171
I wanna shut that nigga down!
1207
01:15:45,044 --> 01:15:47,274
How about a knife, at least?
1208
01:15:47,347 --> 01:15:49,781
Yeah, you know what happens
to motherfuckers carry knives?
1209
01:15:51,684 --> 01:15:53,584
They get shot!
1210
01:15:53,653 --> 01:15:57,680
If I ever become a famous actress,
I won't carry a gun.
1211
01:15:57,757 --> 01:16:01,420
I'll hire me a do-dirt nigga and he'll
carry the gun, and when shit goes down,
1212
01:16:01,494 --> 01:16:04,895
I'll sit back and laugh,
but until that day, it's Wild West.
1213
01:16:04,964 --> 01:16:08,525
So Zo�, you thought about
what you want to do first?
1214
01:16:10,236 --> 01:16:13,865
It just so happens
I know exactly what I want to do.
1215
01:16:13,940 --> 01:16:17,376
Oh, really?
And what would that be?
1216
01:16:17,443 --> 01:16:22,142
To me, there's no point in being in America
unless you can drive a Detroit muscle car.
1217
01:16:22,215 --> 01:16:26,481
I wanna drive a Dodge Challenger...
fuck me swinging, balls out.
1218
01:16:29,455 --> 01:16:32,015
Well, I guess we
could talk to Transpo,
1219
01:16:32,091 --> 01:16:34,491
but does it have to be
a Dodge Challenger?
1220
01:16:34,560 --> 01:16:39,054
Not just that. It has to be a 1970
Dodge Challenger with a 440 engine.
1221
01:16:43,036 --> 01:16:46,164
How in the fuck
do you expect to do that?
1222
01:16:46,239 --> 01:16:47,570
No worries, mate.
1223
01:16:47,640 --> 01:16:49,870
I've got it all worked out.
1224
01:16:49,943 --> 01:16:53,174
When I knew I was coming here,
I went online and found out
1225
01:16:53,246 --> 01:16:56,704
that the local paper here in Tennessee
is the Lebanon News Sentinel.
1226
01:16:56,783 --> 01:16:59,547
- So back home...
- I'm sorry, where's home? Australia?
1227
01:17:02,088 --> 01:17:04,283
What do you mean by that, mate?
1228
01:17:04,357 --> 01:17:07,417
Zo�'s from New Zealand,
and you never...
1229
01:17:07,493 --> 01:17:10,951
I repeat, never...
call a Kiwi an Aussie.
1230
01:17:11,030 --> 01:17:13,726
That is, unless
you want your ass kicked.
1231
01:17:15,635 --> 01:17:17,432
I'm so sorry. I will nev...
1232
01:17:18,638 --> 01:17:20,196
Oh, it's okay.
1233
01:17:20,273 --> 01:17:23,367
We're just taking the piss
out of you, mate.
1234
01:17:23,443 --> 01:17:26,606
Auckland, to answer your question.
1235
01:17:26,679 --> 01:17:29,739
Anyway, I subscribed
to the local paper a month ago.
1236
01:17:29,816 --> 01:17:33,411
Why the fuck you want a local redneck
newspaper in New Zealand?
1237
01:17:33,486 --> 01:17:35,954
Pipe down and I'll tell you.
1238
01:17:36,022 --> 01:17:38,957
I've been getting the paper
and checking the classifieds,
1239
01:17:39,025 --> 01:17:40,617
looking at cars for sale,
1240
01:17:40,693 --> 01:17:45,357
so as of yesterday,
for sale in this town,
1241
01:17:45,431 --> 01:17:48,696
some dude is selling
a stock 1970 Dodge Challenger
1242
01:17:48,768 --> 01:17:52,534
with a 440 engine and a white paint job.
1243
01:17:52,605 --> 01:17:54,402
And you wanna buy it?
1244
01:17:55,675 --> 01:17:59,338
Kim, I may be stupid,
but I'm not bloody stupid.
1245
01:17:59,412 --> 01:18:03,439
I wanna say I wanna buy it
so he'll let me test-drive it.
1246
01:18:03,516 --> 01:18:06,644
A 1970 Dodge Challenger
with a white paint job?
1247
01:18:06,719 --> 01:18:08,277
Oh, uh, Kowalski!
1248
01:18:08,354 --> 01:18:12,120
Kowalski from Vanishing Point.
Mate, it's a fucking classic!
1249
01:18:12,191 --> 01:18:13,624
If I can get this guy
1250
01:18:13,693 --> 01:18:17,561
to let me drive it without him,
I will blow the doors off that bitch.
1251
01:18:17,630 --> 01:18:19,495
What's Vanishing Point?
1252
01:18:20,600 --> 01:18:22,568
What's Vanishing Point?
1253
01:18:22,635 --> 01:18:25,604
Abs, I'm supposed
to be the illiterate one.
1254
01:18:25,671 --> 01:18:28,640
It's just one of the best
American movies ever made.
1255
01:18:28,708 --> 01:18:32,235
Actually, Zo�, most girls
wouldn't know Vanishing Point.
1256
01:18:33,279 --> 01:18:37,306
Excuse me. Most girls?
What the fuck are you two?
1257
01:18:37,383 --> 01:18:40,875
Yeah, well, we're gearheads.
Of course we watched it.
1258
01:18:40,953 --> 01:18:43,319
Y'all grew up watching
that Pretty in Pink shit.
1259
01:18:43,389 --> 01:18:45,721
Oh, I liked Pretty in Pink.
1260
01:18:45,792 --> 01:18:48,260
What, so you didn't watch
John Hughes movies?
1261
01:18:48,327 --> 01:18:52,354
Of course I did. I'm a girl.
But I also watched car shit, too...
1262
01:18:52,432 --> 01:18:55,128
Vanishing Point. Dirty Mary Crazy Larry.
1263
01:18:55,201 --> 01:18:56,759
- Gone in 60 Seconds...
- Oh...
1264
01:18:56,836 --> 01:18:59,805
The real one, not that
Angelina Jolie bullshit.
1265
01:18:59,872 --> 01:19:03,603
We have an outdoor theater in Auckland
that plays Vanishing Point.
1266
01:19:03,676 --> 01:19:06,372
Big Wednesday. all the classics.
1267
01:19:22,962 --> 01:19:24,862
What do you horny gals want?
1268
01:19:28,468 --> 01:19:31,767
Yeah, you got
a 1970 Dodge Challenger for sale?
1269
01:19:31,838 --> 01:19:33,305
Right up here, ladies.
1270
01:19:47,920 --> 01:19:50,980
This shit is off the fuckin' hook!
1271
01:19:51,057 --> 01:19:53,491
Fuckin' legendary, mate.
1272
01:19:55,728 --> 01:20:01,064
Sweet ass. Well, if you 'll excuse me,
I'd like to have a word with my associate.
1273
01:20:01,134 --> 01:20:02,624
You ladies take your time.
1274
01:20:09,475 --> 01:20:12,535
What are you waiting for?
Ask him to let you drive it by yourself.
1275
01:20:12,612 --> 01:20:15,206
I intend to, but first I need
to ask you something.
1276
01:20:15,281 --> 01:20:16,373
What?
1277
01:20:16,449 --> 01:20:20,977
If he lets us take it out on our own,
I wanna play Ship's Mast.
1278
01:20:21,721 --> 01:20:23,450
- Oh, hell, no!
- Keep it down!
1279
01:20:23,523 --> 01:20:25,457
Ain't no way I'm doing Ship's Mast.
1280
01:20:25,525 --> 01:20:26,719
- For Chrissakes...
- Don't blaspheme.
1281
01:20:26,792 --> 01:20:27,781
Sorry.
1282
01:20:27,860 --> 01:20:30,624
Now, what did you say
after the last time?
1283
01:20:30,696 --> 01:20:33,961
- Look, I know what I said.
- What did you say?
1284
01:20:34,033 --> 01:20:36,126
- I know I said we shouldn't...
- No.
1285
01:20:36,202 --> 01:20:39,194
You didn't say we shouldn't.
You said we ain't ever gonna do that again.
1286
01:20:39,272 --> 01:20:41,035
- But...
- But, my ass!
1287
01:20:41,107 --> 01:20:44,133
You said not only are we never
gonna play Ship's Mast again,
1288
01:20:44,210 --> 01:20:47,270
but you also said if you ever do
what you trying to do now,
1289
01:20:47,346 --> 01:20:52,249
to not only refuse, but that I had permission
to physically restrain your ass if necessary.
1290
01:20:52,318 --> 01:20:55,014
Now, did you or did you not say that?
1291
01:20:55,087 --> 01:20:58,352
No, no, no.
Answer the question, motherfucker.
1292
01:20:58,424 --> 01:21:01,860
- Did you or did you not say that?
- Yes, I said that.
1293
01:21:01,928 --> 01:21:03,862
- However...
- Whatever with your "however."
1294
01:21:03,930 --> 01:21:07,866
Look, I know I said it,
and I know I meant it...
1295
01:21:07,934 --> 01:21:09,162
Damn skippy you meant it!
1296
01:21:09,235 --> 01:21:11,931
But when I said it,
I didn't mean in America!
1297
01:21:12,004 --> 01:21:14,029
- Oh, nigga, please.
- For real. Really.
1298
01:21:14,106 --> 01:21:18,133
I meant we should never play Ship's Mast
again in New Zealand or Australia.
1299
01:21:18,211 --> 01:21:19,906
You are such a liar!
1300
01:21:19,979 --> 01:21:25,576
I know what I said, but when I said it
I didn't know I'd ever come to America,
1301
01:21:25,651 --> 01:21:29,052
and if I had of known
I was gonna come to America,
1302
01:21:29,121 --> 01:21:32,784
had the opportunity to play Ship's Mast
on the Vanishing Point Challenger...
1303
01:21:32,858 --> 01:21:34,985
I would have added a "however."
1304
01:21:35,761 --> 01:21:36,750
Right?
1305
01:21:42,235 --> 01:21:44,499
Okay, oddly enough,
I actually understood that.
1306
01:21:44,570 --> 01:21:49,439
However, just because
you talked yourself into some stupid shit
1307
01:21:49,508 --> 01:21:51,635
doesn't mean I have lost
my goddamn mind.
1308
01:21:51,711 --> 01:21:54,942
You need two people to play Ship's Mast,
and I ain't playing.
1309
01:22:02,488 --> 01:22:04,615
I'll be your best friend.
1310
01:22:04,690 --> 01:22:07,591
I don't need me no best friend
lives on the other side of Planet Earth.
1311
01:22:07,660 --> 01:22:08,957
I'll crack your back.
1312
01:22:09,028 --> 01:22:10,495
You 'll crack it anyway.
1313
01:22:10,563 --> 01:22:13,293
Well, of course I'll crack it anyway.
1314
01:22:13,366 --> 01:22:17,029
But now, while I'm here,
I'll be your back-cracking slave.
1315
01:22:17,103 --> 01:22:19,799
Whenever you want it, you 've got it.
You don't even have to ask.
1316
01:22:19,872 --> 01:22:23,330
You just order me to do it, just be like,
"Bitch, get over here and get busy."
1317
01:22:30,549 --> 01:22:34,986
You crack my back, give me foot massages,
and after a shower, you moisturize my butt.
1318
01:22:36,255 --> 01:22:37,244
Deal.
1319
01:22:39,058 --> 01:22:41,856
We're gonna see if this guy'll let us
take the car out without him.
1320
01:22:41,927 --> 01:22:44,919
If he does, you wait here with Lee
and we'll be back in a moment.
1321
01:22:45,498 --> 01:22:46,487
What?
1322
01:22:46,565 --> 01:22:50,968
- I said we're gonna see if this guy'll let...
- I heard what you said.
1323
01:22:51,037 --> 01:22:54,438
I just can't believe
what you said.
1324
01:22:55,775 --> 01:22:57,572
You two got some fuckin' balls.
1325
01:22:57,643 --> 01:22:59,076
What?
1326
01:22:59,145 --> 01:23:00,635
Don't play dumbass with me.
1327
01:23:00,713 --> 01:23:05,707
I've been up all night, I'm still a little drunk,
and I have a hangover.
1328
01:23:05,785 --> 01:23:09,482
I should be in my hotel room, asleep,
not fuckin' around on Tobacco Road,
1329
01:23:09,555 --> 01:23:13,355
but because Zo� wanted to drive
some Vanishing Point car, I'm here.
1330
01:23:13,426 --> 01:23:17,385
Now you two got the balls to ask me...
no, scratch that... tell me
1331
01:23:17,463 --> 01:23:21,957
I gotta go make conversation with Tom Joad
while the cool kids get to go out and play?
1332
01:23:22,034 --> 01:23:23,831
Bullshit on that.
1333
01:23:23,903 --> 01:23:25,928
- It ain't like that.
- What's it like, Kim?
1334
01:23:26,005 --> 01:23:29,907
You guys are our collateral.
He's never gonna go for it if we all go.
1335
01:23:29,975 --> 01:23:33,638
I really think one human being
will be collateral enough.
1336
01:23:34,480 --> 01:23:36,448
You 're not gonna
want to do what we're doing.
1337
01:23:36,515 --> 01:23:37,846
What, drive a car?
1338
01:23:38,884 --> 01:23:39,976
We're doing more than that.
1339
01:23:40,052 --> 01:23:41,747
What, drive it fast?
1340
01:23:43,155 --> 01:23:44,816
We're doing more than that.
1341
01:23:44,890 --> 01:23:49,452
Actually, we're paying you a compliment,
'cause we gonna do some stupid shit.
1342
01:23:51,330 --> 01:23:53,924
But that's okay. We're stunt people.
We ain't got good sense.
1343
01:23:53,999 --> 01:23:56,433
But you got good sense,
and anybody with good sense
1344
01:23:56,502 --> 01:23:59,471
- ain't gonna want to do what we're doing.
- How do you know?
1345
01:23:59,538 --> 01:24:01,597
'Cause you 're a mum.
1346
01:24:01,674 --> 01:24:02,971
Yeah.
1347
01:24:05,644 --> 01:24:08,477
You know, we're supposed
to be this big posse,
1348
01:24:08,547 --> 01:24:12,449
but that's the excuse you guys use
whenever you want to exclude me,
1349
01:24:12,518 --> 01:24:15,385
so what is it you two daredevils are doing
1350
01:24:15,454 --> 01:24:19,720
that I'm just so uncool
I couldn't possibly understand?
1351
01:24:19,792 --> 01:24:22,192
You know, we're kind of conning this guy,
1352
01:24:22,261 --> 01:24:25,958
so maybe it's best if we don't go
into detail about it while he's watching us.
1353
01:24:26,031 --> 01:24:27,020
Besides...
1354
01:24:28,367 --> 01:24:30,927
he's probably not gonna
let us do it, anyway.
1355
01:24:33,806 --> 01:24:36,900
Okay, how about this?
1356
01:24:37,710 --> 01:24:40,873
I'll talk him into it,
but I go along.
1357
01:24:42,047 --> 01:24:44,845
- How you gonna do that?
- That's my problem.
1358
01:24:45,618 --> 01:24:46,778
But don't worry.
1359
01:24:47,653 --> 01:24:49,712
He'll say yes.
1360
01:24:49,789 --> 01:24:51,916
What are you gonna do, blow him?
1361
01:24:51,991 --> 01:24:53,151
No.
1362
01:24:54,527 --> 01:24:57,052
I'm gonna insinuate
that Lee's gonna blow him.
1363
01:25:01,233 --> 01:25:02,928
That's a good one.
1364
01:25:03,002 --> 01:25:04,367
Not really.
1365
01:25:05,404 --> 01:25:08,703
But let me handle it.
We got a deal?
1366
01:25:13,045 --> 01:25:14,444
Okay, Mama, listen up.
1367
01:25:14,513 --> 01:25:18,244
You wanna hang with the cool kids?
You got to be cool.
1368
01:25:18,317 --> 01:25:21,150
We take you along, you don't say shit.
You don't even say crap.
1369
01:25:21,220 --> 01:25:24,246
You just sit in the back, and I don't want
to hear a peep, you understand?
1370
01:25:24,323 --> 01:25:25,722
- Got it.
- I'm serious, now.
1371
01:25:25,791 --> 01:25:29,625
You start nagging us, we pulling over,
kicking you out, and picking you up later.
1372
01:25:29,695 --> 01:25:31,026
Agreed.
1373
01:25:35,100 --> 01:25:38,126
Okay. Go work your magic.
1374
01:25:44,677 --> 01:25:46,269
- Hello, sir.
- Hello.
1375
01:25:46,345 --> 01:25:47,972
- Hello, what's your name?
- Jasper.
1376
01:25:48,047 --> 01:25:49,742
Hello, Jasper, I'm Abernathy.
1377
01:25:49,815 --> 01:25:51,442
- Aber what?
- Abernathy.
1378
01:25:51,517 --> 01:25:53,917
- What's your first name?
- That is my first name.
1379
01:25:53,986 --> 01:25:57,353
- What kind of first name is that?
- Just call me Abbie.
1380
01:25:57,423 --> 01:25:58,981
Okay, Abbie.
1381
01:26:00,125 --> 01:26:03,754
Jasper, we were wondering
if my friends and I could take the car out
1382
01:26:03,829 --> 01:26:06,855
for a little test drive out on our own,
just to see if we're comfortable.
1383
01:26:06,932 --> 01:26:08,695
Why would I do something
stupid like that?
1384
01:26:08,767 --> 01:26:11,099
To better sell your automobile.
1385
01:26:11,170 --> 01:26:13,365
How do I know y'all ain't
just gonna steal it?
1386
01:26:13,439 --> 01:26:15,373
Four reasons, actually.
1387
01:26:15,441 --> 01:26:20,174
One, we're not thieves,
two, that would be rude,
1388
01:26:20,246 --> 01:26:22,908
three, we're staying
at the Days Inn in town...
1389
01:26:22,982 --> 01:26:26,577
you can call, check with management.
We're registered for the next month.
1390
01:26:26,652 --> 01:26:31,316
Actually, Zo�'s not, but Kim and I are,
so we're totally track-downable.
1391
01:26:31,390 --> 01:26:33,119
Who's Kim? The colored girl?
1392
01:26:33,926 --> 01:26:37,521
Yes. Kim would be the girl of color.
1393
01:26:37,596 --> 01:26:39,996
And reason number four...
and the most important:
1394
01:26:40,065 --> 01:26:43,000
while we're taking the car out
for a little spin,
1395
01:26:43,068 --> 01:26:47,505
that'll give you a better opportunity
to get acquainted with our other friend...
1396
01:26:48,374 --> 01:26:49,534
Lee.
1397
01:26:52,811 --> 01:26:54,938
Why does she look
kind of familiar?
1398
01:26:55,014 --> 01:26:58,006
That would be because
she's a famous actress.
1399
01:26:58,083 --> 01:26:59,072
Hmm.
1400
01:27:00,052 --> 01:27:01,542
Why's she dressed like that?
1401
01:27:01,620 --> 01:27:04,783
Well, you see, we're making
a Hollywood movie in town,
1402
01:27:04,857 --> 01:27:07,792
and it's a cheerleader movie,
and she's one of the cheerleaders.
1403
01:27:07,860 --> 01:27:09,521
What's a cheerleader movie?
1404
01:27:09,595 --> 01:27:11,358
A movie about cheerleaders.
1405
01:27:12,598 --> 01:27:13,826
Is it a porno movie?
1406
01:27:15,601 --> 01:27:22,200
Yes, it is, but don't mention it. She's shy.
1407
01:27:25,811 --> 01:27:28,541
Lee, this is Jasper.
Jasper, Lee.
1408
01:27:28,614 --> 01:27:31,344
Now, you two kids
stay out of trouble.
1409
01:27:31,417 --> 01:27:34,409
Hey, good-looking.
Be back to pick you up later.
1410
01:27:34,486 --> 01:27:35,817
Ta-ta!
1411
01:27:46,165 --> 01:27:47,598
Gulp.
1412
01:28:02,147 --> 01:28:03,580
You thinking what I'm thinking?
1413
01:28:05,250 --> 01:28:06,649
I think I'm thinking it.
1414
01:28:06,719 --> 01:28:08,209
What are you and you thinking?
1415
01:28:08,287 --> 01:28:11,620
I'm thinking we told your ass
to shut the fuck up.
1416
01:28:14,293 --> 01:28:16,386
- Where y'all going?
- You stay put.
1417
01:28:16,462 --> 01:28:17,793
I gotta take a...
1418
01:28:35,114 --> 01:28:36,911
So, you ready to do this?
1419
01:28:38,450 --> 01:28:39,508
You sure?
1420
01:28:39,585 --> 01:28:44,249
Well, I always don't want to do it
right before I'm gonna do it.
1421
01:28:44,323 --> 01:28:46,757
I know what you mean,
'cause I don't wanna do it.
1422
01:28:46,825 --> 01:28:47,951
Kim!
1423
01:28:48,027 --> 01:28:50,689
- I'm just saying.
- If you 're gonna take the piss out of it...
1424
01:28:50,763 --> 01:28:52,424
I'm just saying.
1425
01:28:53,866 --> 01:28:55,493
You wanna start out on top?
1426
01:28:56,935 --> 01:29:00,268
Practically doesn't count
if you start on the top.
1427
01:29:05,744 --> 01:29:06,938
Here are your gloves.
1428
01:29:14,119 --> 01:29:16,644
No, no, no, no.
I'm wearing a jacket.
1429
01:29:16,722 --> 01:29:18,485
This is my jacket.
1430
01:29:18,557 --> 01:29:21,856
Um, ain't you supposed to be
my slave or some shit?
1431
01:29:22,961 --> 01:29:26,192
- Come on.
- I'm the one who's on the bonnet.
1432
01:29:26,265 --> 01:29:28,756
Bonnet, my ass.
You on the hood.
1433
01:29:38,077 --> 01:29:40,375
Y'all, I think I hear a car coming.
1434
01:29:40,446 --> 01:29:41,640
Give me your belt.
1435
01:29:46,085 --> 01:29:51,421
This is my cute shit.
Fuck that. Get Abernathy's belt.
1436
01:29:53,258 --> 01:29:55,089
Fine, we'll use Abbie's belt.
1437
01:30:00,432 --> 01:30:03,230
- Give me your belt.
- No. Prada.
1438
01:30:03,302 --> 01:30:04,929
Come on, give her the belt.
1439
01:30:05,003 --> 01:30:08,734
- Magic word.
- Please give her the belt?
1440
01:30:09,775 --> 01:30:11,265
Just 'cause you asked nicely.
1441
01:30:13,979 --> 01:30:15,879
It's nice to be nice, Kim!
1442
01:30:15,948 --> 01:30:17,779
Whatever.
1443
01:30:17,850 --> 01:30:22,253
You know what?
Don't think about asking me to do your hair.
1444
01:30:22,321 --> 01:30:24,755
- Your ass gonna do it.
- You 'll ask "pretty please," bitch,
1445
01:30:24,823 --> 01:30:27,690
because that's what you do when no one
else is looking. You ain't that hard.
1446
01:30:27,760 --> 01:30:29,694
- I ain't getting...
- Abernathy.
1447
01:30:29,762 --> 01:30:31,753
Don't get on my nerves right now.
1448
01:30:31,830 --> 01:30:34,264
- I got shit on my mind.
Ooh!
1449
01:30:34,333 --> 01:30:36,426
You know, I ain't six.
1450
01:30:49,381 --> 01:30:51,747
It's cold. Can we roll up
one of these windows?
1451
01:30:51,817 --> 01:30:53,011
KIM and ZO�: No.
1452
01:30:54,553 --> 01:30:57,283
Okay, Abernathy. Check this out.
1453
01:31:09,067 --> 01:31:10,796
What the fuck are you guys doing?
1454
01:31:20,012 --> 01:31:21,445
What does that mean?
1455
01:31:23,482 --> 01:31:25,973
Whoa!
1456
01:31:29,922 --> 01:31:33,289
Faster, you black bitch! Faster!
1457
01:31:40,599 --> 01:31:42,897
That fast enough for your bony ass?
1458
01:31:42,968 --> 01:31:44,697
Whoo-hoo!
1459
01:31:44,770 --> 01:31:47,330
Whoa ho ho ho!
1460
01:31:47,406 --> 01:31:48,395
Oh!
1461
01:31:50,742 --> 01:31:53,233
Abernathy, get your ass up here.
1462
01:31:57,883 --> 01:32:01,046
Whoa! Whoo-hoo!
1463
01:32:01,119 --> 01:32:02,711
Alrighty.
1464
01:32:02,788 --> 01:32:04,949
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
1465
01:32:17,436 --> 01:32:18,903
Go, go! Go!
1466
01:32:18,971 --> 01:32:21,667
Check it out, bitch.
You want it fucking faster?
1467
01:32:36,054 --> 01:32:37,282
Whoo-hoo!
1468
01:32:37,356 --> 01:32:39,324
Yah hoo hoo!
1469
01:32:39,391 --> 01:32:40,380
##
1470
01:32:48,333 --> 01:32:50,426
Yah hoo hoo!
1471
01:33:37,182 --> 01:33:40,879
- Oh, my God.
- What the fuck? Shit.
1472
01:33:47,159 --> 01:33:47,887
Damn it!
1473
01:33:56,868 --> 01:33:57,994
Now.
1474
01:33:59,338 --> 01:34:01,670
Did you do something to him?
Say something?
1475
01:34:01,740 --> 01:34:03,935
Nothing! Shit.
1476
01:34:04,009 --> 01:34:05,806
Here he comes, Zo�.
He's coming!
1477
01:34:05,877 --> 01:34:06,969
Aah!
1478
01:34:09,214 --> 01:34:10,442
Shit, oh shit!
1479
01:34:10,515 --> 01:34:11,948
No!
1480
01:34:12,818 --> 01:34:14,183
Hold on, Zo�!
1481
01:34:23,428 --> 01:34:25,362
Oh, my God. Zo�!
1482
01:34:25,597 --> 01:34:27,792
- Oh! Hold on!
- I can't!
1483
01:34:31,603 --> 01:34:33,332
Fuck you, motherfucker!
1484
01:34:35,040 --> 01:34:38,373
Zo�! Zo�!
1485
01:34:38,443 --> 01:34:41,844
- I'm sorry I called you a black bitch!
- I forgive you. Hold the fuck on!
1486
01:34:41,913 --> 01:34:44,040
Whoa, whoa, get away!
1487
01:34:46,385 --> 01:34:49,047
Oh, shit.
I can't see. I can't see!
1488
01:34:49,121 --> 01:34:50,452
Zo�, move your leg!
1489
01:34:54,226 --> 01:34:56,160
Oh! Come on, come on!
1490
01:34:59,698 --> 01:35:03,225
Redneck lunatic bastard!
Get away from me!
1491
01:35:03,301 --> 01:35:04,290
fucking legs!
1492
01:35:08,874 --> 01:35:10,899
Oh, my God.
1493
01:35:21,153 --> 01:35:24,054
Shit, I'm scared, Kim.
I'm really scared.
1494
01:35:24,122 --> 01:35:25,555
I know, baby, just hold on.
1495
01:35:25,624 --> 01:35:27,489
Watch your feet!
1496
01:35:29,961 --> 01:35:31,189
You wanna get hot?
1497
01:35:31,263 --> 01:35:33,128
- Fucking son of a bitch!
- You wanna get hot?
1498
01:35:34,299 --> 01:35:36,699
Then suck on this for a while, bitch!
1499
01:35:39,771 --> 01:35:42,205
Zo�! Goddamn it!
1500
01:36:08,200 --> 01:36:10,896
Oh, my God. Get away from us,
you cocksucker!
1501
01:36:10,969 --> 01:36:12,436
Leave us alone!
1502
01:36:12,504 --> 01:36:15,769
Fuck you, motherfucker!
Fuck you!
1503
01:36:20,078 --> 01:36:22,945
Zo�! Zo�! Oh, Zo�!
1504
01:36:24,182 --> 01:36:25,911
Hold on!
1505
01:36:48,039 --> 01:36:49,438
Zo�! Zo�!
1506
01:36:57,549 --> 01:36:58,641
Look out!
1507
01:37:27,212 --> 01:37:29,942
Get ready to fly, bitch.
1508
01:37:33,785 --> 01:37:35,446
- Zo�!
- Zo�, hold on!
1509
01:37:42,394 --> 01:37:44,328
He's right on your fucking ass!
1510
01:38:00,212 --> 01:38:01,804
Hey! Whoo-hoo!
1511
01:38:02,714 --> 01:38:06,480
Hey, ladies, that was fun.
1512
01:38:10,855 --> 01:38:13,346
Well, adios.
1513
01:38:13,425 --> 01:38:15,689
Ow! Fuck!
1514
01:38:17,128 --> 01:38:18,561
Shit! Fuck!
1515
01:38:20,298 --> 01:38:22,858
Run away with your ass!
1516
01:38:24,002 --> 01:38:26,163
You better run, motherfucker!
1517
01:38:31,676 --> 01:38:33,303
That bitch!
1518
01:38:49,160 --> 01:38:50,286
I'm okay!
1519
01:38:50,362 --> 01:38:53,593
Oh, shit! Goddamn it!
1520
01:38:53,665 --> 01:38:56,225
Oh, you fuckin' bitch!
1521
01:38:56,301 --> 01:38:59,964
Of course you are.
Of course you are. What was I thinking?
1522
01:39:01,306 --> 01:39:04,366
What was I thinking?
Zo�, the fucking cat!
1523
01:39:08,480 --> 01:39:10,448
Whew. That was a close one.
1524
01:39:13,818 --> 01:39:16,582
So, where's the maniac?
1525
01:39:16,655 --> 01:39:19,522
I shot him and his punk ass sped off.
1526
01:39:20,625 --> 01:39:22,889
You wanna go get him?
1527
01:39:22,961 --> 01:39:24,986
Oh, hell yeah!
1528
01:39:25,063 --> 01:39:26,052
Honey...
1529
01:39:26,931 --> 01:39:28,899
I think you might want to get out.
1530
01:39:30,035 --> 01:39:31,502
Fuck that shit.
1531
01:39:32,737 --> 01:39:34,637
Let's kill this bastard.
1532
01:39:36,608 --> 01:39:38,974
Okay, get your ass in the back.
Let's go.
1533
01:39:45,150 --> 01:39:46,640
Where the fuck you going?
1534
01:39:46,718 --> 01:39:47,707
I'll be back!
1535
01:39:56,027 --> 01:39:58,757
This'll smart. Sweet. Let's go.
1536
01:39:58,830 --> 01:40:02,596
Oh, fuck yeah, bitch.
Come on. Bring that shit.
1537
01:40:04,769 --> 01:40:06,031
Giddy-up, then!
1538
01:40:14,346 --> 01:40:15,779
Yeah!
1539
01:40:46,978 --> 01:40:48,172
God!
1540
01:40:59,657 --> 01:41:02,148
Come on! Come on.
1541
01:41:10,902 --> 01:41:15,703
Why? Oh, no!
1542
01:41:21,012 --> 01:41:22,502
Ah! Do it.
1543
01:41:23,515 --> 01:41:24,914
Do it.
1544
01:41:25,083 --> 01:41:26,072
Do it.
1545
01:41:31,623 --> 01:41:34,558
Oh, no!
1546
01:41:34,626 --> 01:41:36,787
No, no, no!
1547
01:41:36,861 --> 01:41:38,852
No, God!
1548
01:41:39,497 --> 01:41:41,522
All right, get it together, man.
1549
01:41:43,802 --> 01:41:46,362
What did you...
what am l... what are you gonna do?
1550
01:41:52,777 --> 01:41:54,244
Take him down!
1551
01:41:57,749 --> 01:42:00,650
Now where do you think you 're going?
Fuckin' fuck you!
1552
01:42:00,718 --> 01:42:02,618
Where do you think
you 're fucking going?
1553
01:42:02,687 --> 01:42:04,552
What the fuck do you think...
1554
01:42:08,026 --> 01:42:09,015
Come here!
1555
01:42:16,601 --> 01:42:17,590
Go!
1556
01:42:19,904 --> 01:42:21,462
Whoo-hoo!
1557
01:42:24,576 --> 01:42:27,443
What's wrong with your ass,
motherfucking cocksucker?
1558
01:42:33,451 --> 01:42:37,649
Oh, you 're gonna wiggle your ass at me,
gonna wiggle it at me?
1559
01:42:37,722 --> 01:42:42,125
Oh, don't like it up the ass, do you,
you redneck lunatic bastard?
1560
01:42:42,193 --> 01:42:43,421
Aah!
1561
01:42:43,495 --> 01:42:48,489
Oh, yeah, gonna bust a nut
up in this bitch right now!
1562
01:42:48,566 --> 01:42:52,935
Oh, I'm the horniest motherfucker
on the road!
1563
01:42:54,572 --> 01:42:56,301
Boo-yah, bitch!
1564
01:43:01,279 --> 01:43:04,442
Did you just hit a boat?
1565
01:43:07,452 --> 01:43:09,283
Yeah, come on, Kim, get him!
1566
01:43:09,354 --> 01:43:10,514
Get that motherfucker!
1567
01:43:11,222 --> 01:43:14,191
Forget about the cows, motherfucker!
Move, motherfucker, move!
1568
01:43:16,027 --> 01:43:17,517
Motherfucker!
1569
01:43:17,595 --> 01:43:20,496
I'm 'bout to bust a nut up
in this bitch...
1570
01:43:29,073 --> 01:43:31,405
Watch it, watch it.
1571
01:43:37,282 --> 01:43:38,977
# Tapping that ass
tapping that ass #
1572
01:43:39,050 --> 01:43:40,711
# Tapping that tapping that tapping... #
1573
01:43:40,785 --> 01:43:43,345
Aah!
1574
01:43:48,493 --> 01:43:49,619
Bastard.
1575
01:44:04,409 --> 01:44:06,934
Oh, you know I can't let you go...
1576
01:44:07,946 --> 01:44:10,574
without tapping that ass.
1577
01:44:10,648 --> 01:44:12,548
Oh, fuck me!
1578
01:44:12,617 --> 01:44:14,346
- One...
- Kim?
1579
01:44:14,419 --> 01:44:16,410
...more...
- Kim?
1580
01:44:16,487 --> 01:44:17,954
...time!
1581
01:44:18,022 --> 01:44:20,149
Boo-yah!
1582
01:44:23,995 --> 01:44:27,692
That's what I'm talking...
that's what I'm talking about, bitch!
1583
01:45:28,359 --> 01:45:29,951
Oh, come on!
1584
01:46:00,758 --> 01:46:01,747
Yah!
1585
01:46:10,001 --> 01:46:13,300
Yah ha ha, come on!
1586
01:46:13,371 --> 01:46:17,034
Thought you lost us, motherfucker.
We back, motherfucker. We back.
1587
01:46:17,108 --> 01:46:19,167
Who's laughing now, bitch!
1588
01:46:21,579 --> 01:46:22,568
Shit.
1589
01:46:26,417 --> 01:46:27,406
Come on!
1590
01:46:28,653 --> 01:46:32,749
Here's Cha Cha!
1591
01:46:32,824 --> 01:46:34,724
You 've been such a lunatic bastard!
1592
01:46:34,792 --> 01:46:36,521
I'm sorry!
1593
01:46:36,594 --> 01:46:37,583
What?
1594
01:46:37,662 --> 01:46:41,723
I didn't mean anything.
I was just playing around.
1595
01:46:41,799 --> 01:46:45,064
Oh, he was just playing around!
1596
01:46:45,136 --> 01:46:47,661
- Just playing!
- Well, I ain't playing with you!
1597
01:46:47,739 --> 01:46:49,172
Whoa!
1598
01:46:53,911 --> 01:46:56,072
Oh, look out, look out, look out.
1599
01:47:04,155 --> 01:47:06,385
What's your sign?
1600
01:47:06,457 --> 01:47:07,446
Oh, shit!
1601
01:47:10,762 --> 01:47:12,593
Oh, shit.
1602
01:47:12,663 --> 01:47:15,530
Don't run, don't run,
motherfucker, don't run.
1603
01:47:15,600 --> 01:47:17,124
This baby's on speed!
1604
01:47:24,308 --> 01:47:25,741
Whoa!
1605
01:47:27,111 --> 01:47:29,409
- Aah!
- Yeah, yeah!
1606
01:47:33,451 --> 01:47:35,078
Yeah!
1607
01:47:35,153 --> 01:47:38,486
Jesus fucking Christ,
it's about time.
1608
01:47:53,738 --> 01:47:55,899
Go, go, go, go, go, go!
1609
01:47:58,476 --> 01:47:59,841
Please don't dead-end.
1610
01:48:00,011 --> 01:48:01,410
Please don't dead end.
1611
01:48:01,546 --> 01:48:02,945
Please don't dead-end.
1612
01:48:03,714 --> 01:48:05,204
Please don't dead-end.
1613
01:48:05,349 --> 01:48:06,338
Please don't dead-end.
1614
01:48:06,517 --> 01:48:08,314
Please don't dead-end.
1615
01:48:08,486 --> 01:48:09,714
Please don't dead-end.
1616
01:48:09,854 --> 01:48:11,253
Please don't dead-end.
1617
01:48:11,322 --> 01:48:13,119
Oh, there the motherfucker is.
1618
01:48:13,191 --> 01:48:14,180
Go, go, go!
1619
01:48:14,258 --> 01:48:15,691
Get him, get him, get him!
1620
01:48:15,760 --> 01:48:16,954
Unh!
1621
01:48:33,177 --> 01:48:34,872
Oh, help me!
1622
01:48:46,657 --> 01:48:48,454
Be careful. My right arm's broken.
1623
01:48:48,526 --> 01:48:49,515
This one?
1624
01:48:52,897 --> 01:48:54,694
Oh, you want some shit?
1625
01:48:54,765 --> 01:48:56,892
Motherfucker, kiss my fucking ass.
1626
01:49:00,605 --> 01:49:01,799
Uhn!
1627
01:49:05,443 --> 01:49:06,341
Yah!
1628
01:49:12,149 --> 01:49:13,480
Mother... fucker!
1629
01:49:14,018 --> 01:49:15,815
Motherfucker!
1630
01:49:20,725 --> 01:49:21,714
Asshole!
1631
01:49:39,343 --> 01:49:41,436
# Hang up the chick habit #
1632
01:49:41,512 --> 01:49:45,107
# Hang it up. Daddy.
or you 'll be alone in a quick #
1633
01:49:46,550 --> 01:49:48,347
# Hang up the chick habit #
1634
01:49:48,419 --> 01:49:52,253
# Hang it up. Daddy.
or you 'll never get another fix #
1635
01:49:53,691 --> 01:49:57,286
# I' m telling you it's not a trick.
pay attention. don 't be thick #
1636
01:49:57,361 --> 01:49:59,192
# Or you 're liable to get licked #
1637
01:50:00,364 --> 01:50:04,266
# You 're gonna see the reason why
when they're spitting in your eye #
1638
01:50:04,335 --> 01:50:06,098
# They'll be spitting in your eye #
1639
01:50:07,305 --> 01:50:09,330
# Hang up the chick habit #
1640
01:50:09,407 --> 01:50:13,138
# Hang it up. Daddy.
a girl's not a tonic or a pill #
1641
01:50:14,612 --> 01:50:16,239
# Hang up the chick habit #
1642
01:50:16,314 --> 01:50:20,045
# Hang it up. Daddy
you 're just jumping for a spill #
1643
01:50:21,352 --> 01:50:23,411
# Oh. how your bubble's gonna burst #
1644
01:50:23,487 --> 01:50:27,048
# When you meet another nurse
she'll be driving in a hearse #
1645
01:50:28,059 --> 01:50:31,927
# You 're gonna need a heap of glue
when they all catch up with you #
1646
01:50:31,996 --> 01:50:33,964
# And they cut you up in two #
1647
01:50:35,232 --> 01:50:38,395
# Now your ears are ringing
the birds will stop their singing #
1648
01:50:38,469 --> 01:50:41,495
# Everything is turning gray #
1649
01:50:41,572 --> 01:50:45,064
# No candy in your till.
no cutie left to thrill #
1650
01:50:45,142 --> 01:50:47,372
# You 're alone on a Tuesday #
1651
01:50:48,612 --> 01:50:50,375
# Hang up the chick habit #
1652
01:50:50,448 --> 01:50:54,316
# Hang it up. Daddy.
or you 'll be alone in a quick #
1653
01:50:55,720 --> 01:50:57,483
# Hang up the chick habit #
1654
01:50:57,555 --> 01:51:01,252
# Hang it up. Daddy.
or you 'll never get another fix #
1655
01:51:02,593 --> 01:51:06,359
# I' m telling you it's not a trick.
pay attention. don 't be thick #
1656
01:51:06,430 --> 01:51:09,365
# Or you 're liable to get licked #
1657
01:51:09,433 --> 01:51:13,267
# You 're gonna see the reason why
when they're spitting in your eye #
1658
01:51:13,337 --> 01:51:15,202
# They'll be spitting in your eye #
1659
01:51:16,107 --> 01:51:20,237
# You 're gonna see the reason why
when they're spitting in your eye #
1660
01:51:20,311 --> 01:51:22,142
# They'll be spitting in your eye #