1 00:00:00,009 --> 00:00:40,750 Copyright from ecOtOne™ 2 00:00:40,760 --> 00:00:44,123 JASON: It's 2:18 in the morning in the middle of February. 3 00:00:44,680 --> 00:00:48,009 I've been sitting on a park bench for almost four hours. 4 00:00:48,640 --> 00:00:50,683 I'm fucking freezing. 5 00:00:53,640 --> 00:00:55,559 Why am I sitting here? 6 00:00:55,560 --> 00:00:58,366 Why am I still sitting on this bench? 7 00:00:59,000 --> 00:01:01,479 yöu know, it's probably best if I rewind. 8 00:01:01,480 --> 00:01:04,206 If I back up and explain. 9 00:01:04,880 --> 00:01:07,686 Every relationship arrives at a critical moment, 10 00:01:08,240 --> 00:01:09,519 a juncture, 11 00:01:09,520 --> 00:01:12,724 between moving forward and moving on. 12 00:01:13,520 --> 00:01:16,200 I call that moment the "so." 13 00:01:16,240 --> 00:01:17,521 So... 14 00:01:17,880 --> 00:01:20,119 Where is this going, then? 15 00:01:20,120 --> 00:01:23,679 I think yöu're a... Like... I think yöu're amazing. 16 00:01:23,680 --> 00:01:25,484 I think yöu're an amazing girl. I... 17 00:01:29,600 --> 00:01:30,879 - I think yöu're an amazing person. - No. 18 00:01:30,880 --> 00:01:32,650 I'm breaking up with yöu. 19 00:01:33,000 --> 00:01:34,359 - I have to. - yöu're breaking up? 20 00:01:34,360 --> 00:01:37,559 I'm sorry, Jason, I need somebody who's ready. 21 00:01:37,560 --> 00:01:41,159 I need somebody who doesn't drink coffee out of a cereal bowl. 22 00:01:41,160 --> 00:01:42,559 What? 23 00:01:42,560 --> 00:01:44,046 And has a bed frame. 24 00:01:44,360 --> 00:01:45,639 JASON: I wasn't confused because she was 25 00:01:45,640 --> 00:01:47,279 breaking up with me. 26 00:01:47,280 --> 00:01:48,891 I'm so late for work. 27 00:01:49,360 --> 00:01:53,281 I was confused because I had no idea we were dating. 28 00:01:55,280 --> 00:01:57,879 I'm not even close to the guy yöu need. 29 00:01:57,880 --> 00:01:59,844 The guy yöu deserve. 30 00:02:00,120 --> 00:02:01,606 Like... I'm... 31 00:02:01,880 --> 00:02:04,119 And I'm so sorry that I can't be that guy. 32 00:02:04,120 --> 00:02:06,119 In her defense, we'd been having sex, like, 33 00:02:06,120 --> 00:02:08,163 once a week for six weeks. 34 00:02:08,920 --> 00:02:10,929 I'm so late for work. 35 00:02:11,200 --> 00:02:13,159 But in my defense, that's a hookup 36 00:02:13,160 --> 00:02:14,959 approaching the seeing stage. 37 00:02:14,960 --> 00:02:16,810 I'm sorry, Jason. 38 00:02:17,040 --> 00:02:18,890 No. I understand. 39 00:02:19,640 --> 00:02:20,719 I understand. 40 00:02:20,720 --> 00:02:23,159 And what I understood was, at that moment, 41 00:02:23,160 --> 00:02:25,966 we were definitely not dating. 42 00:02:38,080 --> 00:02:39,964 (PHONE RINGING) 43 00:02:44,600 --> 00:02:45,759 DANIEL: Dude, did yöu get my message? 44 00:02:45,760 --> 00:02:46,999 Man, I left, like, 10 minutes ago... 45 00:02:47,000 --> 00:02:48,119 (CAR HORNS HONKING) 46 00:02:48,120 --> 00:02:50,479 Come on, man. yöu're late. Look, what have yöu been doing? 47 00:02:50,480 --> 00:02:51,679 What have I been doing? 48 00:02:51,680 --> 00:02:53,079 Christy just broke up with me. 49 00:02:53,080 --> 00:02:55,806 Oh, man. Who's Christy? 50 00:02:57,080 --> 00:02:58,964 Vera, yöu home? 51 00:02:59,320 --> 00:03:00,601 (DOOR CLOSES) 52 00:03:01,600 --> 00:03:03,962 Oh. I didn't know we had company. 53 00:03:04,760 --> 00:03:05,799 yöu're home early. 54 00:03:05,800 --> 00:03:07,650 Yeah, I skipped the gym. 55 00:03:08,480 --> 00:03:10,359 Oh, uh, this is my lawyer. 56 00:03:10,360 --> 00:03:11,800 Oh, yöur lawyer. 57 00:03:12,800 --> 00:03:14,843 Actually, he's a very good lawyer. 58 00:03:15,000 --> 00:03:16,611 Is everything okay? 59 00:03:17,440 --> 00:03:19,879 So yöur wife said that she was having intense sex? 60 00:03:19,880 --> 00:03:21,039 Yes, intense. 61 00:03:21,040 --> 00:03:22,159 I can't believe she said, "intense." 62 00:03:22,160 --> 00:03:23,759 That's what she said. With a guy named Harold. 63 00:03:23,760 --> 00:03:26,679 And while she said this, her lawyer was just sitting there? 64 00:03:26,680 --> 00:03:28,166 He looked like Morris Chestnut. 65 00:03:29,240 --> 00:03:30,719 Who the fuck is Morris Chestnut? 66 00:03:30,720 --> 00:03:31,799 From Boyz n the Hood. 67 00:03:31,800 --> 00:03:32,959 - Ricky? - Yeah. 68 00:03:32,960 --> 00:03:34,810 Dude, I love Ricky. 69 00:03:35,080 --> 00:03:36,719 Not anymore. 70 00:03:36,720 --> 00:03:37,919 Who the fuck looks like Morris Chestnut? 71 00:03:37,920 --> 00:03:39,479 - Yeah. That's not a strong look. - Her lawyer. 72 00:03:39,480 --> 00:03:41,559 Her lawyer looks like Morris Chestnut. 73 00:03:41,560 --> 00:03:43,239 Okay, and he was just sitting there on the couch? 74 00:03:43,240 --> 00:03:45,602 Yeah, why was he just sitting there on the couch? 75 00:03:48,320 --> 00:03:50,602 "Cause she wants a divorce." 76 00:03:52,440 --> 00:03:53,559 - That's... - Fuck, man. 77 00:03:53,560 --> 00:03:55,239 - Are yöu kidding me? - I'm sorry. 78 00:03:55,240 --> 00:03:56,479 And here's the kicker, her lawyer, 79 00:03:56,480 --> 00:03:57,599 the guy sitting there, 80 00:03:57,600 --> 00:03:59,439 the guy that looks like Morris Chestnut, 81 00:03:59,440 --> 00:04:01,159 is the guy she's having sex with. 82 00:04:01,160 --> 00:04:02,519 - Harold? - Harold! 83 00:04:02,520 --> 00:04:04,529 - Fuck Harold. - Oh! 84 00:04:05,000 --> 00:04:06,039 Oh, man. 85 00:04:06,040 --> 00:04:08,083 Did... Did he say anything? 86 00:04:09,120 --> 00:04:10,606 (MUMBLES) He said he liked my shoes. 87 00:04:10,840 --> 00:04:12,405 - What? - He said what? 88 00:04:12,520 --> 00:04:14,802 He said he liked my shoes. 89 00:04:19,160 --> 00:04:20,359 Well... 90 00:04:20,360 --> 00:04:22,767 He's not wrong. They're cool shoes. 91 00:04:24,960 --> 00:04:27,159 What the fuck, man? I don't deserve this. 92 00:04:27,160 --> 00:04:29,519 I don't know what we're going to do, man. 93 00:04:29,520 --> 00:04:31,039 We need to get him a hooker. 94 00:04:31,040 --> 00:04:32,119 We can't afford a hooker. 95 00:04:32,120 --> 00:04:33,999 Yeah, we can use a coupon. Get him a cheap hooker. It's Mikey. 96 00:04:34,000 --> 00:04:35,479 - No, we're not. - Look. "East Village girls for hire." 97 00:04:35,480 --> 00:04:36,519 - No. - Right there. 98 00:04:36,520 --> 00:04:37,639 - No. - Yeah. 99 00:04:37,640 --> 00:04:38,679 DANIEL: According to this article, 100 00:04:38,680 --> 00:04:40,719 most of the bars on the East Side are filled with hookers. 101 00:04:40,720 --> 00:04:41,839 yöu know what I love about yöu 102 00:04:41,840 --> 00:04:44,599 is that yöu literally believe every single thing that yöu read. 103 00:04:44,600 --> 00:04:45,719 - No, I don't. - Yes, yöu do. 104 00:04:45,720 --> 00:04:46,839 - No, I don't. - Yes, yöu do. 105 00:04:46,840 --> 00:04:47,999 It's like yöu're nine years old. 106 00:04:48,000 --> 00:04:49,839 Ooh, no, no, no. They're like yöung, cool hookers. 107 00:04:49,840 --> 00:04:51,159 They dress like hipsters and shit. 108 00:04:51,160 --> 00:04:52,719 And I'm telling yöu that I highly doubt 109 00:04:52,720 --> 00:04:54,119 that that is the case. 110 00:04:54,120 --> 00:04:55,199 Then why would it be in a magazine? 111 00:04:55,200 --> 00:04:56,399 I don't know. 112 00:04:56,400 --> 00:04:57,965 Read it. 113 00:04:58,640 --> 00:05:00,959 "She dresses like any other pretty yöung thing," 114 00:05:00,960 --> 00:05:03,399 "knee high boots strewn about the floor," 115 00:05:03,400 --> 00:05:05,679 "and a drawer filled to the hilt with condoms" 116 00:05:05,680 --> 00:05:07,919 "seemed the only indication of her sideline occupation." 117 00:05:07,920 --> 00:05:09,039 How awesome is that? 118 00:05:09,040 --> 00:05:11,199 Hey guys. It's Fred. 119 00:05:11,200 --> 00:05:12,401 Hey, Fred. 120 00:05:13,240 --> 00:05:15,522 yöu know it's not a phone. Right? 121 00:05:16,280 --> 00:05:17,679 yöu're actually here, Fred. 122 00:05:17,680 --> 00:05:18,919 We can see yöu. 123 00:05:18,920 --> 00:05:20,121 FRED: Totally. 124 00:05:21,520 --> 00:05:22,719 Oh! 125 00:05:22,720 --> 00:05:26,447 So yöu're due to present on the Silverman book. 126 00:05:26,880 --> 00:05:28,445 So... 127 00:05:30,240 --> 00:05:32,759 yöu guys are prepared? Right? 128 00:05:32,760 --> 00:05:34,610 We'll be in there. 129 00:05:37,680 --> 00:05:39,166 That's a blank board. 130 00:05:40,640 --> 00:05:42,285 That's a gold mine. 131 00:05:42,840 --> 00:05:45,599 I mean, we gave yöu stacks of examples. 132 00:05:45,600 --> 00:05:47,999 JASON: yöu mean these. Right? 133 00:05:48,000 --> 00:05:49,759 What yöu're seeing there is exactly 134 00:05:49,760 --> 00:05:51,439 what yöu're gonna see everywhere else. 135 00:05:51,440 --> 00:05:52,599 And we can deliver that. 136 00:05:52,600 --> 00:05:55,919 But when we're talking about The Unexpectable Princess... 137 00:05:55,920 --> 00:05:57,159 Which is a great title. 138 00:05:57,160 --> 00:05:58,279 It's a wonderful, wonderful title. 139 00:05:58,280 --> 00:05:59,679 But still, it's drowning 140 00:05:59,680 --> 00:06:02,559 - in a sea of boring pastel. - Uh..huh. 141 00:06:02,560 --> 00:06:03,679 That's not what yöu want. 142 00:06:03,680 --> 00:06:05,359 And that's not what yöu need. 143 00:06:05,360 --> 00:06:06,479 I think I know what yöu need. 144 00:06:06,480 --> 00:06:07,599 I think he does. 145 00:06:07,600 --> 00:06:09,599 JASON: A book's cover should hint at the story. 146 00:06:09,600 --> 00:06:11,199 But not give away too much. 147 00:06:11,200 --> 00:06:12,811 This is about wish fulfillment. 148 00:06:15,160 --> 00:06:18,523 Black and white. Cool and spare. 149 00:06:19,040 --> 00:06:22,159 Now, a recent study using MRIs 150 00:06:22,160 --> 00:06:24,679 showed that women's brains lit up like fireworks 151 00:06:24,680 --> 00:06:26,279 when they were showed pictures of... 152 00:06:26,280 --> 00:06:27,359 A penis. 153 00:06:27,360 --> 00:06:28,721 What? 154 00:06:30,760 --> 00:06:31,959 No. No. 155 00:06:31,960 --> 00:06:33,159 MALE EXECUTIVE: No. (LAUGHS NERVOUSLY) 156 00:06:33,160 --> 00:06:34,441 - No. - No. 157 00:06:34,600 --> 00:06:36,159 No. 158 00:06:36,160 --> 00:06:38,479 JASON: Women's brains lit up like fireworks 159 00:06:38,480 --> 00:06:41,286 when they were showed pictures of 160 00:06:42,640 --> 00:06:44,604 - shoes. - Shoes. 161 00:06:45,440 --> 00:06:47,159 Shoes. 162 00:06:47,160 --> 00:06:52,127 And nothing says wish fulfillment like Christian Louboutin. 163 00:06:52,560 --> 00:06:55,843 Ask any girl in the room. 164 00:06:59,160 --> 00:07:00,521 I love it. 165 00:07:02,240 --> 00:07:03,959 Dude, are yöu taking a shit in there? 166 00:07:03,960 --> 00:07:04,999 Absolutely not. 167 00:07:05,000 --> 00:07:06,959 Every time yöu come over, yöu take a shit in there. 168 00:07:06,960 --> 00:07:09,519 DANIEL: I'm not taking a shit. I'm using self tanner. 169 00:07:09,520 --> 00:07:10,559 Self tanner? 170 00:07:10,560 --> 00:07:12,319 Yeah. I told that assistant at Vogue 171 00:07:12,320 --> 00:07:13,919 I couldn't hang out cause I was in Toulon. 172 00:07:13,920 --> 00:07:16,239 Trying to phase her out of my roster. 173 00:07:16,240 --> 00:07:18,239 Also, I am taking a shit. 174 00:07:18,240 --> 00:07:19,399 JASON: Every time. 175 00:07:19,400 --> 00:07:21,090 Every time. 176 00:07:24,360 --> 00:07:25,559 yöu did the retrieve? Huh? 177 00:07:25,560 --> 00:07:27,599 I just grabbed whatever I could. 178 00:07:27,600 --> 00:07:29,199 (TOILET FLUSHING) 179 00:07:29,200 --> 00:07:31,159 - DANIEL: Yo, Mikey! - Were yöu taking a shit in there? 180 00:07:31,160 --> 00:07:33,199 - Yep. - Jesus! Every time. 181 00:07:33,200 --> 00:07:34,879 - DANIEL: We're going the fuck out. - Is that ice cream? 182 00:07:34,880 --> 00:07:36,359 yöu bought ice cream, Mikey? Come on. 183 00:07:36,360 --> 00:07:37,639 Yeah. It's peanut butter chocolate. 184 00:07:37,640 --> 00:07:39,039 That's a great flavor. Let me see it. 185 00:07:39,040 --> 00:07:40,799 - Hey. We're going out. No ice cream. - No. No. 186 00:07:40,800 --> 00:07:42,879 yöu see, whiskey doesn't mix well with ice cream. 187 00:07:42,880 --> 00:07:44,559 - I need it. - DANIEL: Oh, yöu need it? 188 00:07:44,560 --> 00:07:46,559 - Yes. - yöu need it? What're yöu, a fat teenage girl? 189 00:07:46,560 --> 00:07:47,719 - What're yöu, Bridget Jones? - Really? 190 00:07:47,720 --> 00:07:49,359 - Name calling? Is that what we're doing? - Yeah. 191 00:07:49,360 --> 00:07:50,559 - Give me the ice cream. - No. 192 00:07:50,560 --> 00:07:52,399 - Give me the ice cream. - I know that look. Get away from me. 193 00:07:52,400 --> 00:07:53,479 - Give me the ice cream. - Back up, little man. 194 00:07:53,480 --> 00:07:55,359 - Give me the ice cream. - Get off, man. 195 00:07:55,360 --> 00:07:57,439 Nobody gets ice cream! 196 00:07:57,440 --> 00:07:58,519 That was awesome. 197 00:07:58,520 --> 00:07:59,599 Did yöu throw it out the window? 198 00:07:59,600 --> 00:08:00,847 We're going out. 199 00:08:01,240 --> 00:08:04,119 I mean, I bet yöu thought yöu were never going feel this again, man. 200 00:08:04,120 --> 00:08:06,719 The excitement. The energy. yöu don't get this in relationships. 201 00:08:06,720 --> 00:08:08,159 I've been out of the game so long 202 00:08:08,160 --> 00:08:09,679 I forgot how much I miss this. 203 00:08:09,680 --> 00:08:11,759 yöu were never in the game. yöu were a married doctor. 204 00:08:11,760 --> 00:08:13,319 - Ah, whatever. - Hey, do yöu guys want a mint? 205 00:08:13,320 --> 00:08:14,479 Yeah. 206 00:08:14,480 --> 00:08:15,559 Here we go. That's for yöu. 207 00:08:15,560 --> 00:08:16,679 That's for yöu. 208 00:08:16,680 --> 00:08:17,759 That's a weird mint, dude. 209 00:08:17,760 --> 00:08:19,559 Yeah, I know. It's Viagra. 210 00:08:19,560 --> 00:08:21,959 yöu've got four hours to drink like Keith Richards and still get hard. 211 00:08:21,960 --> 00:08:24,970 Every good action movie has a ticking clock. Right? 212 00:08:25,640 --> 00:08:27,126 Fucking idiots. 213 00:08:27,440 --> 00:08:28,759 Idiots. 214 00:08:28,760 --> 00:08:30,291 (DOWN ON LIFE PLAYING) 215 00:08:31,440 --> 00:08:32,926 I know! 216 00:08:33,280 --> 00:08:35,199 I'm fucking drunk right now. 217 00:08:35,200 --> 00:08:36,401 Yeah, that's right. 218 00:08:40,320 --> 00:08:41,759 I can't wait to get drunk. 219 00:08:41,760 --> 00:08:43,519 I can't do this. I can't do this. 220 00:08:43,520 --> 00:08:45,119 Hey, come here. Yes, yöu can. 221 00:08:45,120 --> 00:08:46,759 Yes, yöu can. yöu just need to be like, 222 00:08:46,760 --> 00:08:48,359 "Hey! I'm a good looking doctor." 223 00:08:48,360 --> 00:08:49,759 No, it would work for me, Mikey. 224 00:08:49,760 --> 00:08:51,119 - Would it? - Yeah, it would. 225 00:08:51,120 --> 00:08:53,004 That would totally work for me. 226 00:08:54,040 --> 00:08:55,599 Hey! Chels! 227 00:08:55,600 --> 00:08:59,719 Oh, my God! I love yöur shoes! I've been looking for those. 228 00:08:59,720 --> 00:09:00,959 Oh, thank yöu! 229 00:09:00,960 --> 00:09:02,959 Wow! yöu are beautiful. 230 00:09:02,960 --> 00:09:05,639 Oh, this is my friend, Daniel. He's amazing. 231 00:09:05,640 --> 00:09:07,649 But he's a virgin. 232 00:09:08,520 --> 00:09:09,999 - Oh, there's always a catch. - CHELSEA: Mmm..hmm. 233 00:09:10,000 --> 00:09:13,319 I'm just trying to get laid before I graduate high school. 234 00:09:13,320 --> 00:09:14,959 Hi, I'm Sophie. 235 00:09:14,960 --> 00:09:16,639 I know yöu are. 236 00:09:16,640 --> 00:09:18,444 ♫ I could use a break ♪ 237 00:09:18,640 --> 00:09:22,845 ♫ Me need to go down, down, down, down on life ♪ 238 00:09:23,080 --> 00:09:26,319 ♫ I need yöu to take all my shadows ♪ 239 00:09:26,320 --> 00:09:27,639 - Whiskey... - Yeah. 240 00:09:27,640 --> 00:09:29,410 - I love yöu. - We're doing it... I love yöu, too. 241 00:09:29,520 --> 00:09:32,041 ♫ I could use a break ♪ 242 00:09:32,400 --> 00:09:36,127 ♫ Me need to go down, down, down, down on life ♪ 243 00:09:36,480 --> 00:09:38,842 I've never met that guy before. 244 00:09:39,400 --> 00:09:42,279 ♫ All my shadows for a walk tonight... ♪ 245 00:09:42,280 --> 00:09:44,679 What's up, buddy? How's it going? 246 00:09:44,680 --> 00:09:45,759 Well, 247 00:09:45,760 --> 00:09:48,319 I'm drinking alone in a bar full of assholes. 248 00:09:48,320 --> 00:09:50,919 And all these girls, they seem to like the assholes more. 249 00:09:50,920 --> 00:09:53,839 Dude, do yöu remember when for, like, two years in college, 250 00:09:53,840 --> 00:09:56,999 every single girl that I liked liked yöu? 251 00:09:57,000 --> 00:09:58,079 Rebecca Daniels... 252 00:09:58,080 --> 00:09:59,199 Yeah. Rebecca Daniels. 253 00:09:59,200 --> 00:10:00,879 - She was hot. - She was. 254 00:10:00,880 --> 00:10:02,399 She was all right. 255 00:10:02,400 --> 00:10:04,728 Where's the Mikey that got her? 256 00:10:05,680 --> 00:10:09,248 Because that guy was fucking awesome. 257 00:10:09,360 --> 00:10:11,927 (MORNING SUN PLAYING) 258 00:10:12,360 --> 00:10:14,289 That girl's staring at yöu at the end of the bar. 259 00:10:14,800 --> 00:10:16,159 - Should I look? - No, not yet. 260 00:10:16,160 --> 00:10:17,239 - Now. - No. 261 00:10:17,240 --> 00:10:18,359 - Now. - No. 262 00:10:18,360 --> 00:10:19,719 - Now. - No. 263 00:10:19,720 --> 00:10:21,524 Yeah, go ahead and look. 264 00:10:31,440 --> 00:10:33,051 Night away? 265 00:10:34,920 --> 00:10:36,963 Yeah. She was fucking Harold. 266 00:10:37,120 --> 00:10:39,004 There's always a Harold. 267 00:10:39,880 --> 00:10:41,525 There's always a Harold. 268 00:10:41,560 --> 00:10:42,759 - Mmm. - Mmm. 269 00:10:42,760 --> 00:10:45,559 When I was a kid, I used to open all the windows in my bedroom 270 00:10:45,560 --> 00:10:49,367 when it was freezing, and just lay on top of the covers. 271 00:10:49,600 --> 00:10:50,719 Why? 272 00:10:50,720 --> 00:10:53,764 I wanted to understand what it felt like to be homeless. 273 00:10:54,560 --> 00:10:56,762 Do yöu understand that feeling? 274 00:10:57,760 --> 00:11:00,122 Just needing to know? 275 00:11:01,360 --> 00:11:02,439 Wow. 276 00:11:02,440 --> 00:11:04,079 I know. 277 00:11:04,080 --> 00:11:06,239 He fucking looked like Morris Chestnut. 278 00:11:06,240 --> 00:11:07,719 (LAUGHS) Who looks like Morris Chestnut? 279 00:11:07,720 --> 00:11:09,879 It is not a good look. Nobody should look like Morris Chestnut. 280 00:11:09,880 --> 00:11:12,199 Okay, who is Morris Chestnut? 281 00:11:12,200 --> 00:11:14,402 Apparently, he's a great lawyer. 282 00:11:16,760 --> 00:11:18,519 Well, I wrote my number on this. 283 00:11:18,520 --> 00:11:20,688 Use it when yöu're ready. 284 00:11:23,040 --> 00:11:24,679 Look, is this the part where we go home? 285 00:11:24,680 --> 00:11:26,159 Cause I'm not really in the mood. 286 00:11:26,160 --> 00:11:28,488 yöu're sitting on my coat. 287 00:11:29,600 --> 00:11:30,961 Hmm. 288 00:11:32,080 --> 00:11:33,520 I am. 289 00:11:34,200 --> 00:11:35,279 I'm sorry about that. 290 00:11:35,280 --> 00:11:37,439 - It's okay. Thanks. - Mmm..hmm. 291 00:11:37,440 --> 00:11:39,483 - Good night. - Good night. 292 00:11:43,240 --> 00:11:44,399 Hey. 293 00:11:44,400 --> 00:11:45,919 I'm gonna get a drink. yöu want a drink? 294 00:11:45,920 --> 00:11:46,959 - Oh, no. I'm good. - Let me get yöu a drink. 295 00:11:46,960 --> 00:11:48,279 - What, a vodka soda? - No, no, no. 296 00:11:48,280 --> 00:11:49,679 - My man. - No. 297 00:11:49,680 --> 00:11:50,959 Come on. It's just a drink. 298 00:11:50,960 --> 00:11:52,159 Oh, no. I'm good. Thank yöu. 299 00:11:52,160 --> 00:11:53,599 I need a drink, too. I'll get yöu a drink. 300 00:11:53,600 --> 00:11:55,799 Honestly, what if I enjoy the drink? 301 00:11:55,800 --> 00:11:57,479 What happens then? (LAUGHS) 302 00:11:57,480 --> 00:12:00,001 I'd love to hear what yöu think happens then. 303 00:12:00,920 --> 00:12:02,519 I'll tell yöu what happens. 304 00:12:02,520 --> 00:12:04,999 We go play beer pong with yöur two roommates 305 00:12:05,000 --> 00:12:07,359 until I end up back at yöurs in Murray Hill? 306 00:12:07,360 --> 00:12:08,919 Yeah, that's right. How did yöu know that? 307 00:12:08,920 --> 00:12:11,679 And then we'll have to listen to yöur roommate have sex with Hilary 308 00:12:11,680 --> 00:12:14,799 or Emily or whatever the girl's name is until we fall asleep. 309 00:12:14,800 --> 00:12:17,159 And then a year later, we're still playing beer pong 310 00:12:17,160 --> 00:12:18,719 in the same bars with yöur friends. 311 00:12:18,720 --> 00:12:21,479 Except now yöu feel pressure to get married and have kids 312 00:12:21,480 --> 00:12:23,679 cause yöu think that's what I want. 313 00:12:23,680 --> 00:12:24,919 Then in the summers, drive up 314 00:12:24,920 --> 00:12:26,119 to the Hamptons to meet his parents, 315 00:12:26,120 --> 00:12:28,599 wondering the whole ride if they're going to think yöu're pretty enough. 316 00:12:28,600 --> 00:12:29,719 - Smart. - Wondering the whole ride, 317 00:12:29,720 --> 00:12:30,959 if they're going to think yöu're smart enough. 318 00:12:30,960 --> 00:12:33,319 Because no one is. And then we have to drink shitty chardonnay. 319 00:12:33,320 --> 00:12:34,519 At a shitty garden party. 320 00:12:34,520 --> 00:12:35,679 And have shitty conversations. 321 00:12:35,680 --> 00:12:36,719 About shitty people. 322 00:12:36,720 --> 00:12:38,119 With his shitty mother. 323 00:12:38,120 --> 00:12:39,799 Who, let's face it, doesn't think yöu're smart enough. 324 00:12:39,800 --> 00:12:40,839 Pretty. 325 00:12:40,840 --> 00:12:43,119 Who, let's face it, doesn't think yöu're pretty enough. 326 00:12:43,120 --> 00:12:44,959 Because no one is. 327 00:12:44,960 --> 00:12:47,049 No one ever will be. 328 00:12:47,720 --> 00:12:49,839 What was all that shit? Look, I'm just talking about a drink. 329 00:12:49,840 --> 00:12:53,839 Yeah, but it wasn't just a drink, though, was it? 330 00:12:53,840 --> 00:12:55,724 It was a marriage proposal. 331 00:12:55,760 --> 00:12:58,361 Oh, marriage. No, I was... 332 00:12:58,600 --> 00:13:00,564 Just a vodka soda. 333 00:13:01,880 --> 00:13:03,286 Fuck yöu guys. I'm... 334 00:13:04,480 --> 00:13:05,966 - Drink? - Yeah. 335 00:13:06,240 --> 00:13:09,011 (HEARTBEAT PLAYING) (BOTH MOANING) 336 00:13:09,640 --> 00:13:10,966 (BOTH LAUGHING) 337 00:13:17,040 --> 00:13:18,399 yöu're amazing. 338 00:13:18,400 --> 00:13:20,284 Let's get out of here. 339 00:13:20,720 --> 00:13:22,251 (LAUGHING) 340 00:13:26,480 --> 00:13:28,170 yöu like that? (BREATHING HEAVILY) 341 00:13:28,560 --> 00:13:31,445 yöu're sitting on my coat. (GROANS) 342 00:13:38,400 --> 00:13:40,762 I have to use yöur bathroom. 343 00:13:42,400 --> 00:13:43,806 (EXHALES) 344 00:14:02,480 --> 00:14:04,045 (GASPS SOFTLY) 345 00:14:05,920 --> 00:14:06,999 Fuck. Pick up. 346 00:14:07,000 --> 00:14:08,479 Pick up. Pick up yöur phone! 347 00:14:08,480 --> 00:14:09,799 Dude, I have a serious problem. 348 00:14:09,800 --> 00:14:12,479 DANIEL: yöu got a problem. I got a problem. I gotta take a leak right now. 349 00:14:12,480 --> 00:14:14,759 And my boner looks like that thing on The Price Is Right. 350 00:14:14,760 --> 00:14:15,839 (WHISPERING) Bob Barker? 351 00:14:15,840 --> 00:14:16,959 Yeah, my dick looks like Bob Barker. 352 00:14:16,960 --> 00:14:19,159 No, yöu asshole, that thing that stops the wheel. 353 00:14:19,160 --> 00:14:21,119 - What? - I think I took too much Viagra. 354 00:14:21,120 --> 00:14:22,279 I just really got to take a leak. 355 00:14:22,280 --> 00:14:25,159 yöu have to just get horizontal. 356 00:14:25,160 --> 00:14:26,999 Get horizontal? What the... 357 00:14:27,000 --> 00:14:28,279 yöu need to be horizontal. 358 00:14:28,280 --> 00:14:30,279 - Me or the boner? - Both. 359 00:14:30,280 --> 00:14:31,959 I can't. My boner is perpendicular to my body. 360 00:14:31,960 --> 00:14:33,079 Just try it, man. 361 00:14:33,080 --> 00:14:35,639 This is the stupidest idea I've ever heard of. What the... 362 00:14:35,640 --> 00:14:36,919 This isn't... Whoa! (URINATING) 363 00:14:36,920 --> 00:14:39,479 Wait, bro, it's actually working. 364 00:14:39,480 --> 00:14:40,959 Of course it is, but, dude, listen to me. 365 00:14:40,960 --> 00:14:43,919 I think the girl that I just had sex with is a hooker. 366 00:14:43,920 --> 00:14:45,079 What? That's awesome. 367 00:14:45,080 --> 00:14:47,679 No! It's not awesome, man. What if she makes me pay? 368 00:14:47,680 --> 00:14:48,879 I don't have hooker money. 369 00:14:48,880 --> 00:14:50,439 - yöu definitely don't have hooker money. - Dude. 370 00:14:50,440 --> 00:14:52,039 I don't know what to do, man. yöu gotta help me. 371 00:14:52,040 --> 00:14:53,759 Okay, well, yöu know what? If she asks for cash, 372 00:14:53,760 --> 00:14:55,479 yöu could pretend that yöu're a hooker, too, 373 00:14:55,480 --> 00:14:57,119 and maybe the rates would balance out. 374 00:14:57,120 --> 00:14:59,159 yöu are so fucking useless. Do yöu know that? 375 00:14:59,160 --> 00:15:00,440 Is yöur dick touching the water? 376 00:15:00,800 --> 00:15:02,001 Fuck yöu. 377 00:15:13,760 --> 00:15:16,531 MIKEY: Which one of yöu divas uses self tanner? 378 00:15:17,000 --> 00:15:18,884 I do. Why? 379 00:15:20,120 --> 00:15:21,639 Because I beat off with it last night. 380 00:15:21,640 --> 00:15:22,759 (BOTH LAUGHING) 381 00:15:22,760 --> 00:15:24,839 Why... Why didn't yöu even read the bottle? 382 00:15:24,840 --> 00:15:25,959 I was a little drunk. 383 00:15:25,960 --> 00:15:27,439 - What? - What? 384 00:15:27,440 --> 00:15:29,165 - My shit is orange. - JASON: Oh! 385 00:15:29,560 --> 00:15:31,599 Oh, my God.Look at this! 386 00:15:31,600 --> 00:15:32,679 Oh, no. 387 00:15:32,680 --> 00:15:34,399 Who knew that could even happen to yöu? 388 00:15:34,400 --> 00:15:35,886 (BOTH CONTINUE LAUGHING) 389 00:15:36,080 --> 00:15:38,239 I didn't know yöu could change colors. 390 00:15:38,240 --> 00:15:40,079 - Stop. - yöur dick looks like a yam. 391 00:15:40,080 --> 00:15:41,879 - yöur dick looks like a traffic cone. - Just stop. 392 00:15:41,880 --> 00:15:44,319 yöur dick looks like a can of cheddar Pringles. 393 00:15:44,320 --> 00:15:45,359 That's fucked up. 394 00:15:45,360 --> 00:15:47,079 JASON: yöu dick looks like Spike Lee at a Knicks game. 395 00:15:47,080 --> 00:15:50,319 If yöur dick was jumping over the river, it would be the General Lee. 396 00:15:50,320 --> 00:15:51,479 (BOTH LAUGHING) 397 00:15:51,480 --> 00:15:54,119 All right! All right! What happened to yöu two idiots last night? 398 00:15:54,120 --> 00:15:55,639 I freaked out and left. I didn't know what to do. 399 00:15:55,640 --> 00:15:57,439 It's her bread and butter. It's how she keeps the lights on. 400 00:15:57,440 --> 00:15:58,559 yöu basically robbed a hooker. 401 00:15:58,560 --> 00:16:00,199 I didn't rob her. 402 00:16:00,200 --> 00:16:01,359 Yes, yöu did. yöu robbed this hooker, man. 403 00:16:01,360 --> 00:16:02,639 yöu're like the opposite of Robin Hood. 404 00:16:02,640 --> 00:16:04,399 I didn't rob her. And that's the thing. I mean, 405 00:16:04,400 --> 00:16:06,119 everything else about her was perfect. 406 00:16:06,120 --> 00:16:07,879 I mean, she was smart. She was funny. 407 00:16:07,880 --> 00:16:09,999 She was the kind of girl I would date. 408 00:16:10,000 --> 00:16:12,879 If she didn't, yöu know, happen to fuck random guys for money. 409 00:16:12,880 --> 00:16:14,719 - ALL: Yeah. - That's really the only thing 410 00:16:14,720 --> 00:16:16,239 that's getting in the way of that relationship. 411 00:16:16,240 --> 00:16:17,439 Fuck yöu guys. 412 00:16:17,440 --> 00:16:19,399 Did yöu friend that girl yet, Mikey? The glasses girl? 413 00:16:19,400 --> 00:16:21,279 No. I mean, can yöu even do that that fast? 414 00:16:21,280 --> 00:16:23,079 Dude! yöu've gotta make her laugh. Get a rapport going. 415 00:16:23,080 --> 00:16:24,159 - Yeah, man. - Give me yöur phone real quick. 416 00:16:24,160 --> 00:16:26,239 Give him yöur phone. We live in an extremely efficient world. 417 00:16:26,240 --> 00:16:28,079 Somebody else could be sealing the deal right now. 418 00:16:28,080 --> 00:16:31,559 Listen, (CHUCKLES) last night was amazing. Okay? I had a great time. 419 00:16:31,560 --> 00:16:33,159 - yöu guys were awesome. - Thank yöu. 420 00:16:33,160 --> 00:16:35,119 All right? But I'm gonna call Vera. 421 00:16:35,120 --> 00:16:37,079 We've got things that we need to work on. 422 00:16:37,080 --> 00:16:38,399 - No. That's a bad move. - Come on. 423 00:16:38,400 --> 00:16:39,599 - yöu don't wanna do that. - Horrible move. 424 00:16:39,600 --> 00:16:41,039 - We had so much fun last night. - Yeah. 425 00:16:41,040 --> 00:16:42,079 Wow. 426 00:16:42,080 --> 00:16:43,399 JASON: What? 427 00:16:43,400 --> 00:16:44,647 Uh, she... 428 00:16:45,800 --> 00:16:47,079 She changed it. 429 00:16:47,080 --> 00:16:48,279 BOTH: What? 430 00:16:48,280 --> 00:16:49,686 What are yöu talking about? 431 00:16:51,640 --> 00:16:53,799 Uh, Vera. 432 00:16:53,800 --> 00:16:56,241 It used to say, "married," and now it says... 433 00:16:58,040 --> 00:16:59,685 It says nothing. 434 00:17:03,240 --> 00:17:04,879 All right, I married a smart girl. 435 00:17:04,880 --> 00:17:06,519 I married the right girl. Right? 436 00:17:06,520 --> 00:17:08,639 I went to med school right after college. 437 00:17:08,640 --> 00:17:10,888 I did what I was supposed to do. 438 00:17:12,960 --> 00:17:14,924 I checked the boxes. 439 00:17:17,720 --> 00:17:19,519 JASON: But maybe what yöu did didn't check hers. 440 00:17:19,520 --> 00:17:21,079 MIKEY: We had the same boxes. 441 00:17:21,080 --> 00:17:22,599 DANIEL: Did yöu have the same boxes? 442 00:17:22,600 --> 00:17:24,119 Maybe yöu need a little more experience with boxes. 443 00:17:24,120 --> 00:17:26,239 Yeah, maybe we should lead yöu down the path to better boxes. 444 00:17:26,240 --> 00:17:27,719 Look, guys. I don't need that. All right? 445 00:17:27,720 --> 00:17:29,799 I need to call Vera and I need to work this shit out. 446 00:17:29,800 --> 00:17:31,319 That's what I'm going to do. I need to call her, okay? 447 00:17:31,320 --> 00:17:33,159 I need to call Vera. I need to work this shit out. 448 00:17:33,160 --> 00:17:34,479 It kills me to see yöu like this. 449 00:17:34,480 --> 00:17:35,841 Yeah. 450 00:17:36,600 --> 00:17:37,679 Hey. 451 00:17:37,680 --> 00:17:39,759 It's an opportunity to have some fun. 452 00:17:39,760 --> 00:17:41,399 Man, this is about all of us, man. 453 00:17:41,400 --> 00:17:42,959 This is about all of us being together. 454 00:17:42,960 --> 00:17:44,559 When are we all gonna be unattached? 455 00:17:44,560 --> 00:17:46,479 In our 30s we're gonna settle down with kids. 456 00:17:46,480 --> 00:17:49,081 We're gonna live a boring life. It's about us right now. 457 00:17:50,000 --> 00:17:51,159 I don't know. 458 00:17:51,160 --> 00:17:53,079 - We're staying single with yöu, man. - I just don't know. 459 00:17:53,080 --> 00:17:54,645 We're staying single with yöu. 460 00:17:55,520 --> 00:17:58,599 We're gonna keep last night alive as long as humanly possible. 461 00:17:58,600 --> 00:18:00,245 Nobody gets in a relationship. 462 00:18:00,480 --> 00:18:02,125 Nobody changes their status. 463 00:18:03,320 --> 00:18:04,851 Right? 464 00:18:07,160 --> 00:18:09,522 I'm in. 465 00:18:12,360 --> 00:18:13,719 - Come on! - Come on! 466 00:18:13,720 --> 00:18:15,285 - Come on! - Come on! 467 00:18:15,680 --> 00:18:18,565 Michael? Are yöu in? 468 00:18:21,000 --> 00:18:22,440 Fuck it. I'm in. 469 00:18:24,960 --> 00:18:26,571 (ALL CHEERING) 470 00:18:28,720 --> 00:18:30,729 - So, we going for this? - Yeah. 471 00:18:34,080 --> 00:18:36,159 I mean, it's a pretty bleak ending to a book, 472 00:18:36,160 --> 00:18:38,559 so shouldn't we leave people with some hope? 473 00:18:38,560 --> 00:18:40,839 From where in the Midwest did this one wash up? 474 00:18:40,840 --> 00:18:42,759 Fresh off her master's from Chicago. 475 00:18:42,760 --> 00:18:44,919 Master's in what? Sentimentality? 476 00:18:44,920 --> 00:18:46,929 I don't think so. 477 00:18:47,200 --> 00:18:49,759 I just think yöu have to believe in possibility. 478 00:18:49,760 --> 00:18:51,639 Oh, sweetie. Welcome to New York. 479 00:18:51,640 --> 00:18:54,605 yöu're yöung and yöu're pretty and the world is yöurs. 480 00:18:56,000 --> 00:18:58,168 But yöu're nobody's first wife yet. 481 00:18:59,960 --> 00:19:01,759 Well, we're all pretty... 482 00:19:01,760 --> 00:19:03,479 - Oh! Oh, look who's here. - Hi. 483 00:19:03,480 --> 00:19:04,679 FRED: Glad yöu could make it. 484 00:19:04,680 --> 00:19:05,799 Yeah. 485 00:19:05,800 --> 00:19:08,759 DANIEL: I gotta tell yöu I'm really excited about this cover, guys. 486 00:19:08,760 --> 00:19:10,079 JASON: (YAWNS) Hey. 487 00:19:10,080 --> 00:19:11,805 - Here yöu go. - Okay. 488 00:19:11,920 --> 00:19:13,399 (SIGHS) Hey. 489 00:19:13,400 --> 00:19:15,284 Holy shit. 490 00:19:18,200 --> 00:19:20,971 Everyone. How's it going? 491 00:19:21,080 --> 00:19:22,566 FRED: Good, good. 492 00:19:23,360 --> 00:19:24,800 Uh... 493 00:19:29,360 --> 00:19:31,719 So, do yöu want to tell us a little bit 494 00:19:31,720 --> 00:19:34,127 about yöur approach with this cover? 495 00:19:39,120 --> 00:19:42,005 Yeah. I'd love a little explanation. 496 00:19:44,840 --> 00:19:46,326 Um... 497 00:19:49,280 --> 00:19:50,759 It... (STAMMERING) 498 00:19:50,760 --> 00:19:52,759 It is what it is. 499 00:19:52,760 --> 00:19:54,199 AMANDA: "It is what it is"? 500 00:19:54,200 --> 00:19:56,319 That's what yöu say when yöu get a parking ticket. 501 00:19:56,320 --> 00:19:57,519 I know. 502 00:19:57,520 --> 00:20:00,405 It looks to me like the guy here wants to escape. 503 00:20:00,480 --> 00:20:02,489 Hmm. Does he? 504 00:20:02,960 --> 00:20:06,519 AMANDA: And we want him to stay. That's the fantasy of men in the city. 505 00:20:06,520 --> 00:20:08,959 It seems like she'll bring him home in the bag, 506 00:20:08,960 --> 00:20:11,919 totally trusting him and then after they sleep together, 507 00:20:11,920 --> 00:20:13,879 he'll prove to be too much of an asshole 508 00:20:13,880 --> 00:20:16,606 to actually stick around for a couple of hours. 509 00:20:17,720 --> 00:20:22,323 So tell me, Jason. Why wouldn't the guy stay? 510 00:20:23,280 --> 00:20:24,641 Hmm? 511 00:20:24,760 --> 00:20:26,644 I thought yöu were a hooker. 512 00:20:27,960 --> 00:20:29,079 What? 513 00:20:29,080 --> 00:20:30,159 A hooker. 514 00:20:30,160 --> 00:20:31,239 Why? 515 00:20:31,240 --> 00:20:32,319 There were hooker signs. 516 00:20:32,320 --> 00:20:33,439 What's a hooker sign? 517 00:20:33,440 --> 00:20:35,119 - yöu had on hooker boots. - Lots of people have them. 518 00:20:35,120 --> 00:20:36,159 There were tons of condoms. 519 00:20:36,160 --> 00:20:37,279 Did yöu ever think they might be there 520 00:20:37,280 --> 00:20:38,439 because I'm not having a ton of sex? 521 00:20:38,440 --> 00:20:40,039 No! I thought they were a hooker sign! 522 00:20:40,040 --> 00:20:41,159 What's a hooker sign? 523 00:20:41,160 --> 00:20:42,719 What about The Story of O? 524 00:20:42,720 --> 00:20:44,319 That was research for a book. 525 00:20:44,320 --> 00:20:45,839 There were envelopes full of cash. 526 00:20:45,840 --> 00:20:49,599 I pay my landlord in cash so that he can commit tax fraud. 527 00:20:49,600 --> 00:20:52,041 How long have yöu lived in New York? 528 00:20:52,840 --> 00:20:54,319 Man, not long enough. 529 00:20:54,320 --> 00:20:55,839 Yeah. 530 00:20:55,840 --> 00:20:58,008 Wait. Can I make it up to yöu? 531 00:20:58,240 --> 00:20:59,930 Let me make it up to yöu. 532 00:21:01,000 --> 00:21:03,202 yöu wanna make it up to me? 533 00:21:04,280 --> 00:21:05,527 Can I? 534 00:21:09,320 --> 00:21:10,760 I don't know. 535 00:21:14,520 --> 00:21:16,051 yöu can have my number. 536 00:21:17,160 --> 00:21:18,725 And... 537 00:21:19,200 --> 00:21:21,562 Maybe yöu can. 538 00:21:39,840 --> 00:21:42,679 Yeah, dude. Everybody knows yöu can't call a girl a hooker. 539 00:21:42,680 --> 00:21:44,279 Even hookers hate being called hookers. 540 00:21:44,280 --> 00:21:45,759 I'm gonna bring Ellie around. 541 00:21:45,760 --> 00:21:47,919 No, yöu're not! No, yöu're not. 542 00:21:47,920 --> 00:21:49,119 I'm gonna get her on the roster. 543 00:21:49,120 --> 00:21:50,279 Wait. A roster? 544 00:21:50,280 --> 00:21:51,359 Yeah. A roster. 545 00:21:51,360 --> 00:21:52,599 It's a group of girls that yöu're hooking up with 546 00:21:52,600 --> 00:21:53,919 that keeps yöu from sending the wrong message. 547 00:21:53,920 --> 00:21:55,719 - Which is what? - That yöu wanna date one of them. 548 00:21:55,720 --> 00:21:57,319 yöu gotta start building a roster. 549 00:21:57,320 --> 00:21:58,719 Yeah. It'll help ease the transition a little. 550 00:21:58,720 --> 00:21:59,879 No, no. I do not need a roster. Okay? 551 00:21:59,880 --> 00:22:00,919 Yes, yöu do. 552 00:22:00,920 --> 00:22:02,079 I can't keep one girl. 553 00:22:02,080 --> 00:22:03,319 What makes yöu think I can handle a bunch of them? 554 00:22:03,320 --> 00:22:05,039 yöu just keep a bunch of them for a short period of time 555 00:22:05,040 --> 00:22:06,599 and then yöu send them out into the world to flourish. 556 00:22:06,600 --> 00:22:07,879 - Like college kids. - Yes. 557 00:22:07,880 --> 00:22:09,199 Or like capitalism. 558 00:22:09,200 --> 00:22:10,559 And then yöu replenish the team. 559 00:22:10,560 --> 00:22:13,119 Think of a roster like a spiritual and physical... 560 00:22:13,120 --> 00:22:14,279 Mostly physical. 561 00:22:14,280 --> 00:22:15,919 Rejuvenation of the male soul. 562 00:22:15,920 --> 00:22:17,639 Which yöu guys clearly don't fucking have. 563 00:22:17,640 --> 00:22:18,879 Think of it like a spa. 564 00:22:18,880 --> 00:22:20,279 A spa for yöur cock. 565 00:22:20,280 --> 00:22:22,079 - A cock spa. - Yep. 566 00:22:22,080 --> 00:22:23,679 yöu just got to use whatever skills 567 00:22:23,680 --> 00:22:25,199 - that yöu have available to yöu. - Mmm. 568 00:22:25,200 --> 00:22:26,999 Girls love personalization. 569 00:22:27,000 --> 00:22:28,079 yöu guys are idiots. 570 00:22:28,080 --> 00:22:29,281 yöu're an idiot. 571 00:22:31,880 --> 00:22:33,161 (DOOR OPENS) 572 00:22:33,240 --> 00:22:34,726 Vera! 573 00:22:35,720 --> 00:22:37,759 Look, I'm... I'm sorry to barge in on yöu. 574 00:22:37,760 --> 00:22:39,325 What are yöu doing here? 575 00:22:40,560 --> 00:22:42,000 Okay, look. 576 00:22:42,960 --> 00:22:46,369 I know that this is an awkward thing to do, but... 577 00:22:48,200 --> 00:22:49,526 Um... 578 00:22:50,440 --> 00:22:54,087 I have been having some pain. 579 00:22:54,760 --> 00:22:57,008 And, um, I just... 580 00:22:58,920 --> 00:23:00,804 I don't know. 581 00:23:01,240 --> 00:23:02,959 yöu came because yöu needed my help. 582 00:23:02,960 --> 00:23:04,639 I came to apologize. I did. 583 00:23:04,640 --> 00:23:06,604 - yöu came because yöu needed my help. - Mikey. 584 00:23:08,480 --> 00:23:11,923 I just... I've been thinking about yöu. 585 00:24:03,520 --> 00:24:06,039 It really was just a simple misunderstanding. 586 00:24:06,040 --> 00:24:07,359 Yeah, it was like, "What kind of girl would I be" 587 00:24:07,360 --> 00:24:09,199 "if I didn't eventually find it funny?" 588 00:24:09,200 --> 00:24:12,927 yöu'd be probably every other girl in the world. I think. 589 00:24:14,720 --> 00:24:16,046 I'm really sorry. 590 00:24:16,520 --> 00:24:18,719 But I'm not every other girl in the world. 591 00:24:18,720 --> 00:24:20,001 No. 592 00:24:20,160 --> 00:24:21,239 I guess yöu're not. 593 00:24:21,240 --> 00:24:23,919 And then I kind of developed my own style, I guess. 594 00:24:23,920 --> 00:24:25,559 And now yöu... 595 00:24:25,560 --> 00:24:27,239 Design book covers. 596 00:24:27,240 --> 00:24:28,759 Amongst other things. 597 00:24:28,760 --> 00:24:31,039 Well, I guess yöu get people to believe in something enough 598 00:24:31,040 --> 00:24:32,399 to want to buy it. 599 00:24:32,400 --> 00:24:34,719 I get people to believe in the surface. 600 00:24:34,720 --> 00:24:37,679 To do the one thing yöur parents told yöu not to do. 601 00:24:37,680 --> 00:24:39,719 To judge a book by its cover. 602 00:24:39,720 --> 00:24:41,046 Exactly. 603 00:24:41,400 --> 00:24:42,719 Oh, we weren't supposed to do that. 604 00:24:42,720 --> 00:24:44,079 yöu weren't supposed to do that. 605 00:24:44,080 --> 00:24:46,159 See? I was encouraged. 606 00:24:46,160 --> 00:24:48,840 Another example of just plain awful parenting. 607 00:24:50,920 --> 00:24:53,519 But, like, the job that yöu have right now, 608 00:24:53,520 --> 00:24:55,761 like, is it something that yöu actually want to be doing? 609 00:24:56,080 --> 00:24:57,919 yöu know what? It can be fun. 610 00:24:57,920 --> 00:24:59,679 But do I love it? 611 00:24:59,680 --> 00:25:00,959 - yöu don't. - No. 612 00:25:00,960 --> 00:25:02,844 Don't yöu want to love something? 613 00:25:04,600 --> 00:25:06,679 What? Do yöu love what yöu do? 614 00:25:06,680 --> 00:25:08,839 I started this new lecture series. 615 00:25:08,840 --> 00:25:11,359 And authors can come along and they can talk about their work. 616 00:25:11,360 --> 00:25:12,559 - That's awesome. - Yes. So great. 617 00:25:12,560 --> 00:25:14,079 - And people come? - No. 618 00:25:14,080 --> 00:25:15,805 - No? - No. (LAUGHS) 619 00:25:16,160 --> 00:25:17,399 But I... 620 00:25:17,400 --> 00:25:19,999 It's okay. I mean, I figure that if I keep doing It, 621 00:25:20,000 --> 00:25:21,919 it could be a really, really amazing thing. 622 00:25:21,920 --> 00:25:23,406 (LAUGHING) 623 00:25:24,480 --> 00:25:28,039 yöu should come along to one of them if yöu're around. 624 00:25:28,040 --> 00:25:29,119 Oh, I don't know. 625 00:25:29,120 --> 00:25:31,641 I can't really tell if it's important to yöu. 626 00:25:31,800 --> 00:25:33,331 (LAUGHING) 627 00:25:35,960 --> 00:25:38,527 I'm sorry. That's a weird laugh. 628 00:25:45,560 --> 00:25:48,001 ELLIE: This is my favorite place in the city. 629 00:25:48,560 --> 00:25:50,205 JASON: Yeah. It's beautiful. 630 00:25:51,560 --> 00:25:56,049 (LAUGHS) I know that I'm romanticizing the idea, 631 00:25:57,320 --> 00:25:58,851 but come on. 632 00:25:59,360 --> 00:26:03,485 That's kind of my dream. To have the key to Gramercy Park. 633 00:26:05,160 --> 00:26:09,126 New York's charm is yöu're surrounded by things yöu can't have. 634 00:26:09,960 --> 00:26:14,245 New York's charm is it makes yöu think yöu can have them. 635 00:26:20,200 --> 00:26:25,440 yöu know, I'd love to look inside before we buy. 636 00:26:25,920 --> 00:26:27,359 Me, too. 637 00:26:27,360 --> 00:26:30,519 In the meantime, we can go back to my place. 638 00:26:30,520 --> 00:26:32,799 It's very similar, actually. 639 00:26:32,800 --> 00:26:36,049 Except for everything about it. 640 00:26:36,840 --> 00:26:38,439 I gotta get home. 641 00:26:38,440 --> 00:26:40,005 Okay. yöurs, it is. 642 00:26:40,200 --> 00:26:41,519 yöu're one hell of a negotiator. 643 00:26:41,520 --> 00:26:45,199 This kind of stuff just rolls off yöur tongue doesn't it? 644 00:26:45,200 --> 00:26:47,607 I'm just trying to make yöu laugh. 645 00:26:58,720 --> 00:27:01,446 I don't like how well it's working. 646 00:27:07,640 --> 00:27:09,001 (SIGHS) Fuck... 647 00:27:12,720 --> 00:27:14,839 CHELSEA: Wait, so yöu guys still haven't gotten Mikey laid? 648 00:27:14,840 --> 00:27:15,879 - No. - What's wrong with yöu? 649 00:27:15,880 --> 00:27:16,959 yöu're like the worst wingman ever. 650 00:27:16,960 --> 00:27:18,879 Are yöu kidding me, Chelsea? I'm an incredible wingman. 651 00:27:18,880 --> 00:27:20,079 I know, but, like, nothing? 652 00:27:20,080 --> 00:27:21,239 It's just harder than yöu think with him. 653 00:27:21,240 --> 00:27:22,279 Like, what about a blowjob? 654 00:27:22,280 --> 00:27:23,679 I'm good right now, but thank yöu. 655 00:27:23,680 --> 00:27:24,999 - Uh..huh. - Maybe in, like, 10 minutes? 656 00:27:25,000 --> 00:27:26,079 Maybe after this beer? 657 00:27:26,080 --> 00:27:27,159 Sorry, I'm just making a mental list 658 00:27:27,160 --> 00:27:29,119 of all the things I'd like to do before giving yöu a blowjob. 659 00:27:29,120 --> 00:27:30,439 Wow. Really? 660 00:27:30,440 --> 00:27:32,959 Oh! Kill myself is number one. 661 00:27:32,960 --> 00:27:34,810 Are yöu serious? Jesus. What's number two? 662 00:27:34,880 --> 00:27:37,279 Uh... Just, like, awaiting trial in Guantanamo. 663 00:27:37,280 --> 00:27:38,919 - Mmm..hmm? Yup. - Mmm..hmm. Yeah. 664 00:27:38,920 --> 00:27:42,279 Oh, come on, man. The blues? Are yöu fucking serious? 665 00:27:42,280 --> 00:27:46,079 What the fuck does Captain Attractive have to be so sad about? 666 00:27:46,080 --> 00:27:47,599 I don't know. 667 00:27:47,600 --> 00:27:52,279 I think he's going for brooding and dark, mysterious. 668 00:27:52,280 --> 00:27:53,439 It's kind of working for me. 669 00:27:53,440 --> 00:27:54,719 - That is working? - Yes. 670 00:27:54,720 --> 00:27:57,239 yöu cannot be that attractive and have a skill. That's bullshit. 671 00:27:57,240 --> 00:27:59,159 Well, I'm gonna play, so yöu're wrong. 672 00:27:59,160 --> 00:28:01,119 Ooh, then somebody's in trouble. 673 00:28:01,120 --> 00:28:03,368 Cheer up, asshole. yöu're the guy. 674 00:28:04,320 --> 00:28:05,599 Buckle up. 675 00:28:05,600 --> 00:28:07,519 Hey, excuse me? I just wanted to tell yöu great job. 676 00:28:07,520 --> 00:28:09,131 I almost cried right there. 677 00:28:09,160 --> 00:28:10,719 It was really some powerful stuff. 678 00:28:10,720 --> 00:28:12,719 Yeah. It was brooding, dark, and mysterious, apparently. 679 00:28:12,720 --> 00:28:14,649 - Yeah. - Thanks. That's what I was going for. 680 00:28:14,680 --> 00:28:15,959 Told yöu. 681 00:28:15,960 --> 00:28:16,999 This is my friend, Chelsea. 682 00:28:17,000 --> 00:28:19,639 She's not much to look at, but wait till yöu hear her play the piano. 683 00:28:19,640 --> 00:28:20,919 Really good. 684 00:28:20,920 --> 00:28:22,246 I can't wait. I'm Diego. 685 00:28:22,880 --> 00:28:23,959 I know yöu are. 686 00:28:23,960 --> 00:28:26,679 I warn yöu, though. She can be really aggressive sometimes. 687 00:28:26,680 --> 00:28:27,799 (LAUGHS) Is that right? 688 00:28:27,800 --> 00:28:29,999 But yöu can tame her with tequila and compliments. 689 00:28:30,000 --> 00:28:31,119 - Yeah. - So... 690 00:28:31,120 --> 00:28:32,679 - Super aggressive. - Oh, yeah? 691 00:28:32,680 --> 00:28:33,839 Hey, are yöu home? 692 00:28:33,840 --> 00:28:35,279 MIKEY: No. I'm at the hospital. Where are yöu? 693 00:28:35,280 --> 00:28:36,559 I'm headed back. 694 00:28:36,560 --> 00:28:37,799 All right. So? 695 00:28:37,800 --> 00:28:38,839 How was it? 696 00:28:38,840 --> 00:28:40,959 It was amazing, man. She was amazing. 697 00:28:40,960 --> 00:28:42,640 So is she coming back to the house or what? 698 00:28:43,400 --> 00:28:44,931 Not exactly. 699 00:28:45,920 --> 00:28:47,724 (PLAYING AFTER yöu'VE GONE) 700 00:28:48,880 --> 00:28:54,723 ♫ Now listen, honey, while I say ♪ 701 00:28:56,240 --> 00:29:01,890 ♫ How can yöu fix yöur mind to say yöu're going away? ♪ 702 00:29:04,040 --> 00:29:06,641 ♫ Don't say that we must part ♪ 703 00:29:11,120 --> 00:29:15,848 ♫ Don't break my aching heart ♪ 704 00:29:18,560 --> 00:29:21,684 ♫ yöu know yöu love me... ♪ 705 00:29:23,800 --> 00:29:25,239 Hey. 706 00:29:25,240 --> 00:29:26,679 After midnight? Really? 707 00:29:26,680 --> 00:29:28,484 - I couldn't sleep. - Hmm. 708 00:29:30,840 --> 00:29:32,883 It's good to see yöu. 709 00:29:33,680 --> 00:29:37,487 ♫ How can yöu leave me? ♪ 710 00:29:40,840 --> 00:29:44,601 ♫ Listen while I say ♪ (SIGHS) 711 00:29:45,720 --> 00:29:47,445 (DOORBELL BUZZING) 712 00:29:48,520 --> 00:29:50,802 ♫ After yöu've gone ♪ 713 00:29:52,240 --> 00:29:55,683 ♫ After yöu've gone away ♪ 714 00:29:59,400 --> 00:30:00,840 (LAUGHING) 715 00:30:06,480 --> 00:30:08,839 So what happened with yöu and the piano man? Rodrigo? 716 00:30:08,840 --> 00:30:10,439 - Diego? - Diego. 717 00:30:10,440 --> 00:30:11,559 I don't know. 718 00:30:11,560 --> 00:30:13,439 I don't want to date a guy that's prettier than me. yöu know? 719 00:30:13,440 --> 00:30:15,159 Yeah. Me neither. 720 00:30:15,160 --> 00:30:16,479 Plus, he works out. 721 00:30:16,480 --> 00:30:17,799 I don't want a man that works out. 722 00:30:17,800 --> 00:30:20,639 Yeah. I worked out once. 2004. 723 00:30:20,640 --> 00:30:22,519 Got on the 15 dumbbells. 724 00:30:22,520 --> 00:30:24,519 I was like, "Those are way too light, let me go to the 30s." 725 00:30:24,520 --> 00:30:25,559 - Nice. - And if yöu feel it... 726 00:30:25,560 --> 00:30:26,719 Don't. I don't wanna touch it. 727 00:30:26,720 --> 00:30:27,919 And then I hit the hammies. 728 00:30:27,920 --> 00:30:29,359 Some quads. And if yöu feel that. 729 00:30:29,360 --> 00:30:30,759 yöu definitely got the lingo down. 730 00:30:30,760 --> 00:30:31,879 - Do yöu see that? - No. 731 00:30:31,880 --> 00:30:33,359 - Ah, well... - Fat. 732 00:30:33,360 --> 00:30:35,879 That's what happens when yöu work out 733 00:30:35,880 --> 00:30:37,605 - once. - (LAUGHS) 734 00:30:39,080 --> 00:30:40,479 What are yöu doing here anyway? 735 00:30:40,480 --> 00:30:41,639 - What do yöu mean? - I don't know. 736 00:30:41,640 --> 00:30:44,199 Weren't yöu supposed to hang out with that girl from Trinity? 737 00:30:44,200 --> 00:30:49,639 Oh, yeah. I had to tell her I wasn't looking for anything too serious. 738 00:30:49,640 --> 00:30:51,719 Oh. Cause if it ever stopped being fun for yöu 739 00:30:51,720 --> 00:30:53,679 guys, yöu'd want to just call it off? 740 00:30:53,680 --> 00:30:55,119 - That's... Yeah. - I know. 741 00:30:55,120 --> 00:30:56,199 yöu got it down. 742 00:30:56,200 --> 00:30:57,279 - Brother. I know the spiel. - Brother. 743 00:30:57,280 --> 00:30:58,720 Yeah. 744 00:30:58,840 --> 00:31:00,359 I don't know. I just thought yöu liked her. 745 00:31:00,360 --> 00:31:01,519 I did like her. 746 00:31:01,520 --> 00:31:04,159 She was cool, really smart, funny, well read. 747 00:31:04,160 --> 00:31:05,959 - Great family. - Love it 748 00:31:05,960 --> 00:31:07,959 And gave the best blowjob in recorded history. 749 00:31:07,960 --> 00:31:09,599 I feel like every blowjob yöu get, 750 00:31:09,600 --> 00:31:11,199 yöu think is the best in recorded history... 751 00:31:11,200 --> 00:31:13,119 Well, if yöu look at the common variable 752 00:31:13,120 --> 00:31:15,039 across all encounters, yöu'll find that it's me. 753 00:31:15,040 --> 00:31:18,359 So maybe I'm the best in recorded history at receiving blowjobs. 754 00:31:18,360 --> 00:31:19,679 - Bam. - Bam. 755 00:31:19,680 --> 00:31:21,279 - Think about that. - Don't want to. 756 00:31:21,280 --> 00:31:24,639 Cheers to me getting awesome blowjobs and just being good at it. 757 00:31:24,640 --> 00:31:25,839 yöu're such an idiot. Oh! 758 00:31:25,840 --> 00:31:27,087 Oh. 759 00:31:52,480 --> 00:31:54,091 (BOTH PANTING) 760 00:32:03,880 --> 00:32:07,289 So? Jason, where is this going? 761 00:32:08,160 --> 00:32:09,359 (QUIETLY) Fuck. 762 00:32:09,360 --> 00:32:10,766 Um... 763 00:32:11,440 --> 00:32:15,565 Look, I think yöu're an amazing girl. 764 00:32:16,600 --> 00:32:19,559 And if I was in a different place, maybe, 765 00:32:19,560 --> 00:32:21,199 but, I mean, yöu know that I'm not 766 00:32:21,200 --> 00:32:22,799 really looking for anything serious. 767 00:32:22,800 --> 00:32:26,288 Yeah. Yeah, yeah. As soon as this stops being fun for one of us. 768 00:32:36,360 --> 00:32:37,879 Hey, J-Go! How'd it go with that hooker? 769 00:32:37,880 --> 00:32:39,206 Oh! 770 00:32:40,040 --> 00:32:41,559 Did yöu just call me a hooker? 771 00:32:41,560 --> 00:32:43,489 No, I meant the other... Um... 772 00:32:44,680 --> 00:32:46,239 Yeah. I just said the wrong thing just now. 773 00:32:46,240 --> 00:32:47,639 yöu think? 774 00:32:47,640 --> 00:32:49,569 Yes. 775 00:32:50,400 --> 00:32:52,170 - Hey, Mikey? - (CLEARS THROAT) 776 00:32:54,920 --> 00:32:55,999 - Mikey? - Mmm? 777 00:32:56,000 --> 00:32:58,123 - Can yöu shut the door? - Oh, shit. 778 00:33:02,400 --> 00:33:04,399 Okay. I'd like to apologize. 779 00:33:04,400 --> 00:33:05,559 Don't worry about it. 780 00:33:05,560 --> 00:33:06,807 Caffeine? 781 00:33:07,280 --> 00:33:09,359 No, thanks. I gotta run. 782 00:33:09,360 --> 00:33:11,999 But at least he offers. 783 00:33:12,000 --> 00:33:13,079 I offer. 784 00:33:13,080 --> 00:33:14,159 yöu've never offered. 785 00:33:14,160 --> 00:33:16,079 For the record. I'm sorry for anything I said. 786 00:33:16,080 --> 00:33:18,599 Am saying. And might say in the future. 787 00:33:18,600 --> 00:33:20,839 An apology. So sweet. 788 00:33:20,840 --> 00:33:22,919 I like him better than yöu. For the record. 789 00:33:22,920 --> 00:33:24,999 For the record, he is better than me. 790 00:33:25,000 --> 00:33:26,439 - Ha! - This is true. 791 00:33:26,440 --> 00:33:27,846 Bye. 792 00:33:30,640 --> 00:33:32,279 - So yöu went out with... - Ellie. 793 00:33:32,280 --> 00:33:33,439 Then yöu came home and had sex with... 794 00:33:33,440 --> 00:33:34,559 Alana. 795 00:33:34,560 --> 00:33:35,799 Jesus! 796 00:33:35,800 --> 00:33:37,679 - I did that for yöu. - yöu did it for me? 797 00:33:37,680 --> 00:33:39,439 - Yeah. - yöu had sex with a beautiful woman for me? 798 00:33:39,440 --> 00:33:40,519 Yeah. For yöu. 799 00:33:40,520 --> 00:33:41,839 Thank yöu. Thank yöu. 800 00:33:41,840 --> 00:33:44,359 If I need anything else, I'll be sure to let yöu know. 801 00:33:44,360 --> 00:33:45,719 I'm just building my roster, man. 802 00:33:45,720 --> 00:33:47,239 - Roster? - Yeah, my roster. 803 00:33:47,240 --> 00:33:48,279 Ellie's on the way in. 804 00:33:48,280 --> 00:33:49,679 Alana just gave me the "so." 805 00:33:49,680 --> 00:33:50,919 The "so"? 806 00:33:50,920 --> 00:33:51,959 Yeah, the "so." 807 00:33:51,960 --> 00:33:55,159 When it comes to girls, nothing good ever follows the word "so." 808 00:33:55,160 --> 00:33:56,999 "So," where is this going? 809 00:33:57,000 --> 00:33:58,559 "So," what're we doing? 810 00:33:58,560 --> 00:33:59,799 And yöu just got the "so"? 811 00:33:59,800 --> 00:34:01,319 Yeah, I just got the "so." 812 00:34:01,320 --> 00:34:02,799 So that's when yöu get out. 813 00:34:02,800 --> 00:34:03,919 Always? 814 00:34:03,920 --> 00:34:05,167 Always. 815 00:34:13,440 --> 00:34:15,290 yöu're a fucking idiot. 816 00:34:18,880 --> 00:34:21,159 JASON: So Chelsea worked her magic again? 817 00:34:21,160 --> 00:34:23,199 - Yeah, yeah. In a sense, yeah. - Really? 818 00:34:23,200 --> 00:34:25,039 So, is she, like, hot. She smart, cool? 819 00:34:25,040 --> 00:34:26,719 Oh, yeah. Yeah, all of the above. 820 00:34:26,720 --> 00:34:27,999 Wow, really? 821 00:34:28,000 --> 00:34:29,359 Yeah. I'm not gonna date her. 822 00:34:29,360 --> 00:34:31,319 She's not datable if that's what yöu're getting at, okay? 823 00:34:31,320 --> 00:34:33,249 So let's just calm down. 824 00:34:33,640 --> 00:34:35,079 What about yöu? Did yöu see what's her name? 825 00:34:35,080 --> 00:34:36,199 - Ellie? - Oh, yeah. 826 00:34:36,200 --> 00:34:38,079 Yeah. We, like, went to the park. We hung out. 827 00:34:38,080 --> 00:34:39,319 Went to the park, hung out? 828 00:34:39,320 --> 00:34:41,319 yöu liked this girl when yöu thought she was a hooker. 829 00:34:41,320 --> 00:34:42,399 (LAUGHS) 830 00:34:42,400 --> 00:34:43,999 - Are yöu falling in love? - No, man. 831 00:34:44,000 --> 00:34:46,159 I think yöu are. I can hear it in yöur voice. 832 00:34:46,160 --> 00:34:47,839 I had sex with Alana. 833 00:34:47,840 --> 00:34:49,439 - yöu had sex with both of them? - No. 834 00:34:49,440 --> 00:34:50,959 yöu fucking double gophered? 835 00:34:50,960 --> 00:34:52,399 - I didn't. - Sorry, sorry, sorry. 836 00:34:52,400 --> 00:34:54,359 yöu double gophered? I love that. 837 00:34:54,360 --> 00:34:55,839 yöu had sex with both of them. That's awesome. 838 00:34:55,840 --> 00:34:58,279 No, I didn't. Ellie went home. Alana came over. 839 00:34:58,280 --> 00:34:59,479 That's what I love about yöu. 840 00:34:59,480 --> 00:35:00,679 Like, yöu never push too hard. 841 00:35:00,680 --> 00:35:02,159 - yöu always have a backup. - Yeah. 842 00:35:02,160 --> 00:35:04,279 yöu're like Judge Reinhold in Beverly Hills Cop. 843 00:35:04,280 --> 00:35:05,519 I'm not getting in a relationship. 844 00:35:05,520 --> 00:35:07,000 - Except yöu're an asshole. - (LAUGHS) 845 00:35:10,440 --> 00:35:12,483 (PHONE RINGING) 846 00:35:15,120 --> 00:35:16,759 Hello. This is Ellie. 847 00:35:16,760 --> 00:35:17,919 JASON: Hey. 848 00:35:17,920 --> 00:35:19,239 It's Jason. 849 00:35:19,240 --> 00:35:21,079 All right, we're going on a date tomorrow. 850 00:35:21,080 --> 00:35:23,639 Gramercy Park. Dress nicely. 851 00:35:23,640 --> 00:35:25,046 No questions. 852 00:35:25,240 --> 00:35:26,771 yöu in? 853 00:35:30,680 --> 00:35:31,759 Yeah. 854 00:35:31,760 --> 00:35:33,159 Vera, we have to talk. 855 00:35:33,160 --> 00:35:34,959 JASON: Mikey, did yöu call the glasses girl, yet? 856 00:35:34,960 --> 00:35:37,399 Can yöu come see me tonight? It's important. 857 00:35:37,400 --> 00:35:38,999 Dude. Tell us how the call went. 858 00:35:39,000 --> 00:35:40,799 - Nope. I'm not pissing. - Okay. 859 00:35:40,800 --> 00:35:42,199 - Come on in. - First of all, 860 00:35:42,200 --> 00:35:43,519 - yöur dick looks like it found Nemo. - Stop. 861 00:35:43,520 --> 00:35:45,359 Second of all, are yöu gonna see glasses girl? 862 00:35:45,360 --> 00:35:46,439 She gonna come see me tonight. 863 00:35:46,440 --> 00:35:50,199 First of all, I think yöur dick looks like a snowman's nose. 864 00:35:50,200 --> 00:35:51,759 - Can yöu stop? - Second of all, 865 00:35:51,760 --> 00:35:53,039 - Mmm..hmm. - I thought yöu worked tonight? 866 00:35:53,040 --> 00:35:54,439 - She might come by the hospital. - No. 867 00:35:54,440 --> 00:35:56,399 Mikey, I love yöur thinking on this, man. 868 00:35:56,400 --> 00:35:57,919 The work date combination. 869 00:35:57,920 --> 00:35:59,079 - It's very impressive. - Yeah. 870 00:35:59,080 --> 00:36:00,159 I'm just thinking on my toes. 871 00:36:00,160 --> 00:36:01,239 JASON: He knows shit, man. 872 00:36:01,240 --> 00:36:03,159 It's casual. It's innovative. 873 00:36:03,160 --> 00:36:04,879 - Mmm. - I love yöur work, man. 874 00:36:04,880 --> 00:36:07,719 I love that jacket. Where are yöu going tonight? 875 00:36:07,720 --> 00:36:08,879 I have a pretty big night ahead of me. 876 00:36:08,880 --> 00:36:12,079 I'm playing the incredibly wealthy Mr. Von Ferrington. 877 00:36:12,080 --> 00:36:13,639 That's so awesome! 878 00:36:13,640 --> 00:36:15,039 yöu're role playing. yöu're committing. 879 00:36:15,040 --> 00:36:16,119 Exactly. What are yöu doing? 880 00:36:16,120 --> 00:36:17,199 I'm going to meet up with Chelsea 881 00:36:17,200 --> 00:36:18,279 and see what we can make happen. 882 00:36:18,280 --> 00:36:19,359 Again? 883 00:36:19,360 --> 00:36:20,519 Why is she always hooking yöu up with girls? 884 00:36:20,520 --> 00:36:21,959 Have yöu looked in the mirror? Have yöu looked at me? 885 00:36:21,960 --> 00:36:23,719 I'm the most attractive. So it's the easiest. 886 00:36:23,720 --> 00:36:25,359 - Come on. - Yeah! That's why. 887 00:36:25,360 --> 00:36:27,679 Guys, in high school, I was voted most likely to have the best eyes. 888 00:36:27,680 --> 00:36:29,399 - MIKEY: That's just not true. - So... 889 00:36:29,400 --> 00:36:30,601 Yeah, right. 890 00:36:31,120 --> 00:36:32,606 yöu idiot. 891 00:36:39,040 --> 00:36:41,559 MRS. ROSE: Do yöu know that James Harper lived here? 892 00:36:41,560 --> 00:36:43,721 - JASON: Really? - He used to be the mayor of New York. 893 00:36:44,480 --> 00:36:47,639 yöu've really chosen a wonderful property to look at Mr. Von... 894 00:36:47,640 --> 00:36:48,759 - Ferrington. - Ferrington. 895 00:36:48,760 --> 00:36:50,439 - Von Ferrington. - Von Ferrington. 896 00:36:50,440 --> 00:36:53,919 I mean, this is one of the finest properties in the city. 897 00:36:53,920 --> 00:36:56,088 - Thank yöu. - yöu're welcome. 898 00:36:58,760 --> 00:37:01,399 Look at the parquet floors that are all inlaid and original. 899 00:37:01,400 --> 00:37:02,919 And this. 900 00:37:02,920 --> 00:37:05,168 Let me show yöu this. 901 00:37:07,200 --> 00:37:10,479 Unfettered access to the private park 902 00:37:10,480 --> 00:37:13,639 is, of course, one of the finest things about living on Gramercy. 903 00:37:13,640 --> 00:37:14,999 Unfettered? 904 00:37:15,000 --> 00:37:16,326 Unfettered. 905 00:37:17,640 --> 00:37:21,839 And now further, I'd like yöu to take a look at this wrought iron. 906 00:37:21,840 --> 00:37:23,319 Lattice wrought iron which is the original. 907 00:37:23,320 --> 00:37:24,799 Original? 908 00:37:24,800 --> 00:37:26,559 And we have in here a beautiful, 909 00:37:26,560 --> 00:37:28,279 beautiful, beautiful chandelier, 910 00:37:28,280 --> 00:37:29,839 which is cut crystal. 911 00:37:29,840 --> 00:37:32,839 yöu'll notice all of the detail on the ceiling. 912 00:37:32,840 --> 00:37:36,679 Now the Obasan rug is original of the period. 913 00:37:36,680 --> 00:37:39,690 And we have over there a stained glass window. 914 00:37:40,400 --> 00:37:42,568 - Let's go. - Why? 915 00:37:42,880 --> 00:37:44,999 Look at the detail on this poster here. 916 00:37:45,000 --> 00:37:47,959 Let's go, let's go, let's go! I'll explain later. 917 00:37:47,960 --> 00:37:50,159 Oh, here, the kitchen. 918 00:37:50,160 --> 00:37:51,885 Quick! The old woman's coming! 919 00:37:52,760 --> 00:37:54,246 Hello? 920 00:37:54,840 --> 00:37:55,999 Won't we get caught? 921 00:37:56,000 --> 00:37:57,559 I don't think so. Let's go. 922 00:37:57,560 --> 00:37:58,999 Hello? 923 00:37:59,000 --> 00:38:00,999 Mr. Ferrington? 924 00:38:01,000 --> 00:38:02,201 Hello? 925 00:38:03,400 --> 00:38:05,439 Whoa, whoa. Slow down. Slow down. Just walk normal. 926 00:38:05,440 --> 00:38:06,559 What do yöu mean walk... 927 00:38:06,560 --> 00:38:08,559 - yöu're walking like a criminal. - What? This is how I walk. 928 00:38:08,560 --> 00:38:09,719 I'm not a criminal. 929 00:38:09,720 --> 00:38:11,445 But I am. 930 00:38:12,760 --> 00:38:14,559 We have to go. Let's go! 931 00:38:14,560 --> 00:38:16,125 Hello? 932 00:38:16,720 --> 00:38:17,921 Hello? 933 00:38:20,120 --> 00:38:22,719 Okay. yöu said we need to talk. 934 00:38:22,720 --> 00:38:23,879 Nobody says, "We need to talk," 935 00:38:23,880 --> 00:38:24,959 unless it's really bad news, right? 936 00:38:24,960 --> 00:38:26,079 No, no, no. 937 00:38:26,080 --> 00:38:27,199 And my grandmother had ovarian cancer. 938 00:38:27,200 --> 00:38:29,239 No, no, no. yöu're fine, yöu're fine, yöu're fine! 939 00:38:29,240 --> 00:38:31,399 The tests they ran indicated nothing out of the ordinary. 940 00:38:31,400 --> 00:38:32,599 - I have all the symptoms. - Baby, yöu're fine. 941 00:38:32,600 --> 00:38:33,719 yöu're fine. yöu're okay. 942 00:38:33,720 --> 00:38:34,759 - Come here. - What was that message then? 943 00:38:34,760 --> 00:38:36,519 Come here. No, no. Come here. 944 00:38:36,520 --> 00:38:39,291 Okay. I am sorry. I just wanted to talk. 945 00:38:39,520 --> 00:38:41,722 Oh, my God. yöu are such an idiot. 946 00:38:42,000 --> 00:38:43,239 yöu are such an idiot. 947 00:38:43,240 --> 00:38:44,439 Yes. 948 00:38:44,440 --> 00:38:46,719 Just... Just... Just come sit down. Okay? 949 00:38:46,720 --> 00:38:48,046 (SIGHS) 950 00:38:48,720 --> 00:38:50,285 Oh, God. 951 00:38:51,480 --> 00:38:53,359 Breathe. Breathe. 952 00:38:53,360 --> 00:38:55,608 Oh, God, I thought I was dying. 953 00:38:56,840 --> 00:38:58,280 (LAUGHS) 954 00:39:01,000 --> 00:39:03,439 Yeah. yöu thought yöu were dying. 955 00:39:03,440 --> 00:39:04,971 That was me. 956 00:39:08,840 --> 00:39:10,280 (EXHALES) 957 00:39:12,880 --> 00:39:14,570 Where did we go wrong? 958 00:39:15,360 --> 00:39:19,199 Like, what happened? 959 00:39:19,200 --> 00:39:20,401 What happened to us? 960 00:39:22,400 --> 00:39:24,045 What happened? I... 961 00:39:25,520 --> 00:39:27,319 I mean, we got married at 23 years old, 962 00:39:27,320 --> 00:39:30,399 I just don't think at that point yöu are ready for a life 963 00:39:30,400 --> 00:39:33,001 without excitement or spontaneity. 964 00:39:33,200 --> 00:39:34,731 Spontaneity? 965 00:39:34,920 --> 00:39:36,201 I mean, I'm spontaneous. 966 00:39:38,800 --> 00:39:41,241 We didn't have sex for almost six months. 967 00:39:41,720 --> 00:39:43,445 yöu want spontaneous? 968 00:39:52,440 --> 00:39:53,479 - Hey. - Hi. 969 00:39:53,480 --> 00:39:55,159 - Are yöu sick or something? - No. 970 00:39:55,160 --> 00:39:56,639 Those aren't going out clothes. 971 00:39:56,640 --> 00:39:58,119 Well, who's going out? 972 00:39:58,120 --> 00:40:00,084 I thought we were going out. 973 00:40:01,640 --> 00:40:03,126 BOTH: Oh! 974 00:40:04,000 --> 00:40:06,079 - That was pretty badass. - Mmm..hmm. 975 00:40:06,080 --> 00:40:07,850 I can get fired for that shit. 976 00:40:36,280 --> 00:40:40,199 yöu know, when I was a kid, I used to love going to parks. 977 00:40:40,200 --> 00:40:45,361 And my grandfather used to take me every Sunday. 978 00:40:46,360 --> 00:40:48,279 But my ex hated parks. 979 00:40:48,280 --> 00:40:51,999 He thought they were like too public or something. 980 00:40:52,000 --> 00:40:53,959 He sounds like a real dick. 981 00:40:53,960 --> 00:40:55,199 What? My ex? 982 00:40:55,200 --> 00:40:56,479 yöur grandfather. 983 00:40:56,480 --> 00:40:57,920 (LAUGHING) 984 00:40:58,040 --> 00:41:00,641 So what happened between the two of yöu? 985 00:41:02,240 --> 00:41:04,719 Well, I graduated from school and I moved to New York. 986 00:41:04,720 --> 00:41:07,199 And he took a job in Chicago. 987 00:41:07,200 --> 00:41:13,009 And it was sort of like a focus on yöur work life first sort of thing. 988 00:41:13,480 --> 00:41:15,682 They call us the selfish generation. 989 00:41:18,360 --> 00:41:20,005 What about yöu? 990 00:41:22,520 --> 00:41:26,042 Who's the one that got yöu? 991 00:41:27,720 --> 00:41:29,759 How dare yöu assume that I have 992 00:41:29,760 --> 00:41:31,719 any emotional capacity whatsoever? 993 00:41:31,720 --> 00:41:33,319 - Get out of my park. - No. 994 00:41:33,320 --> 00:41:35,090 - Get out. - No. 995 00:41:35,760 --> 00:41:38,088 It's okay. yöu can come back. 996 00:41:49,920 --> 00:41:51,610 Damn it! 997 00:41:51,840 --> 00:41:53,279 I was so not gonna do that. 998 00:41:53,280 --> 00:41:54,519 I was gonna hold out. 999 00:41:54,520 --> 00:41:56,919 I was gonna make yöu wait, like, 40 days or something. 1000 00:41:56,920 --> 00:41:59,319 I was gonna make yöu wait, too, 1001 00:41:59,320 --> 00:42:01,807 but then I realized, "I'm a dude." 1002 00:42:02,640 --> 00:42:04,080 (LAUGHING) 1003 00:42:17,560 --> 00:42:19,967 Hey, guys. It's Fred. 1004 00:42:20,880 --> 00:42:23,959 Jesus! Fred, yöu're like Reverse Elvis, yöu know. 1005 00:42:23,960 --> 00:42:25,571 Fred, yöu entered the building. 1006 00:42:26,640 --> 00:42:28,330 I love Elvis. 1007 00:42:32,120 --> 00:42:34,004 "Thank yöu, very much." 1008 00:42:36,800 --> 00:42:37,959 What's up, Fred? 1009 00:42:37,960 --> 00:42:42,290 Well, Ellie from Simon just sent over the Matterhorn book cover. 1010 00:42:43,200 --> 00:42:44,319 And she wants us to do it? 1011 00:42:44,320 --> 00:42:45,599 Specifically. 1012 00:42:45,600 --> 00:42:46,799 Specifically? 1013 00:42:46,800 --> 00:42:48,047 - Specifically. -DANIEL: Whoo! 1014 00:42:50,400 --> 00:42:52,329 I'll get in on that. 1015 00:42:53,960 --> 00:42:55,400 Right. 1016 00:42:59,800 --> 00:43:01,206 Come on. 1017 00:43:02,400 --> 00:43:03,679 - Thanks, Fred. - Yeah. 1018 00:43:03,680 --> 00:43:04,759 All right. 1019 00:43:04,760 --> 00:43:06,086 Gonna do it! 1020 00:43:08,320 --> 00:43:10,799 Wait, okay, so let me get this straight. 1021 00:43:10,800 --> 00:43:13,159 yöu have sex with this girl. We get a job out of it? 1022 00:43:13,160 --> 00:43:14,359 Certainly seems that way. 1023 00:43:14,360 --> 00:43:17,882 And to think this whole time, we thought that poor girl was a hooker. 1024 00:43:17,920 --> 00:43:19,519 Well, yeah. 1025 00:43:19,520 --> 00:43:23,719 But in reality, the only prostitute here is yöu. 1026 00:43:23,720 --> 00:43:25,126 (CHUCKLES) 1027 00:43:26,880 --> 00:43:28,764 (INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS) 1028 00:43:33,000 --> 00:43:34,406 (SIGHS) 1029 00:43:36,120 --> 00:43:37,879 ELLIE: No one came again. 1030 00:43:37,880 --> 00:43:40,560 Again? Why don't yöu get better authors? 1031 00:43:40,880 --> 00:43:43,279 Oh, yöu know, I never even thought of that. (JASON LAUGHS) 1032 00:43:43,280 --> 00:43:45,799 Yes, I've tried that. I've been trying. 1033 00:43:45,800 --> 00:43:47,679 Well, come by my place after for a drink. 1034 00:43:47,680 --> 00:43:49,211 I'll come by after. 1035 00:43:50,000 --> 00:43:52,559 I don't understand why yöu won't tell me. Just tell me where yöu did it. 1036 00:43:52,560 --> 00:43:54,039 I'm not telling yöu, so stop asking. 1037 00:43:54,040 --> 00:43:55,879 Why? yöu know yöu're gonna tell me. yöu tell me everything. 1038 00:43:55,880 --> 00:43:57,359 I do. But I'm not telling yöu this right now. 1039 00:43:57,360 --> 00:43:58,759 - Why? - Cause I'm whupping yöur ass. 1040 00:43:58,760 --> 00:44:00,399 yöu get all precious with this stuff and yöu throw down, 1041 00:44:00,400 --> 00:44:01,599 and slap me in the mouth. 1042 00:44:01,600 --> 00:44:02,919 Whenever yöu start losing, yöu just get upset. 1043 00:44:02,920 --> 00:44:04,719 Dude, did yöu just take another shit in there? 1044 00:44:04,720 --> 00:44:06,239 - No, I'm not. - Every time. 1045 00:44:06,240 --> 00:44:07,759 Why do yöu care so much about what I'm doing in there? 1046 00:44:07,760 --> 00:44:08,839 I wasn't taking a shit. 1047 00:44:08,840 --> 00:44:10,359 yöu're so disgusting. Dude. 1048 00:44:10,360 --> 00:44:12,839 Why do yöu guys care so much what I do in the bathroom? 1049 00:44:12,840 --> 00:44:13,919 And I wasn't taking a shit. 1050 00:44:13,920 --> 00:44:14,999 - MIKEY: Every time. - Yes, yöu... 1051 00:44:15,000 --> 00:44:16,479 Have a little faith. What are yöu guys talking about? 1052 00:44:16,480 --> 00:44:17,679 Mikey won't tell me where he had sex last night. 1053 00:44:17,680 --> 00:44:18,799 Oh, Mikey, where did yöu have sex last night? 1054 00:44:18,800 --> 00:44:20,159 Why do yöu care so much about where I had sex? 1055 00:44:20,160 --> 00:44:21,239 Cause we're yöur friends. We wanna know. 1056 00:44:21,240 --> 00:44:22,601 Where'd yöu have sex, Mikey? 1057 00:44:23,000 --> 00:44:24,079 The hospital. 1058 00:44:24,080 --> 00:44:25,479 - JASON: (GASPS) With the glasses girl? - Are yöu serious? 1059 00:44:25,480 --> 00:44:28,239 Oh, my God! yöu Grey's Anatomy motherfucker! 1060 00:44:28,240 --> 00:44:29,879 Mikey, that is awesome. 1061 00:44:29,880 --> 00:44:31,399 Dude, yöur wife never would've had sex in the hospital. 1062 00:44:31,400 --> 00:44:33,439 - She's too uptight. - Not in a million years. 1063 00:44:33,440 --> 00:44:35,839 I'm fucking proud of yöu. Really am proud of yöu. 1064 00:44:35,840 --> 00:44:37,724 - (DOORBELL BUZZING) - Whoa! What is that? 1065 00:44:38,000 --> 00:44:39,359 I don't know. 1066 00:44:39,360 --> 00:44:40,559 MIKEY: yöu order food? 1067 00:44:40,560 --> 00:44:41,719 I mean, we're all here. 1068 00:44:41,720 --> 00:44:43,679 - I didn't order food. Did yöu order food? - No. 1069 00:44:43,680 --> 00:44:45,041 ELLIE ON INTERCOM: Hey. 1070 00:44:45,400 --> 00:44:46,806 So. It's Ellie. 1071 00:44:47,720 --> 00:44:50,279 What the fuck? Are yöu serious, dude? 1072 00:44:50,280 --> 00:44:52,479 Jason, this is a den of testosterone, man. 1073 00:44:52,480 --> 00:44:53,959 - This is a pre game. - This is my apartment. 1074 00:44:53,960 --> 00:44:55,119 That's a good point. 1075 00:44:55,120 --> 00:44:57,839 It's not a good point. First of all, guys, I just took a shit in there. 1076 00:44:57,840 --> 00:44:59,119 - I knew it. - It's every time. 1077 00:44:59,120 --> 00:45:00,319 Why don't yöu take a shit at yöur own apartment? 1078 00:45:00,320 --> 00:45:02,799 yöu can't invite a girl to a place like this. 1079 00:45:02,800 --> 00:45:04,519 - I didn't invite her. - DANIEL: yöu didn't invite her? 1080 00:45:04,520 --> 00:45:05,879 - No. - That's worse. 1081 00:45:05,880 --> 00:45:07,639 That's some girlfriend shit. 1082 00:45:07,640 --> 00:45:09,330 Some I have a girlfriend shit. 1083 00:45:09,880 --> 00:45:11,439 Okay, well, I'm gonna buzz her in. 1084 00:45:11,440 --> 00:45:12,879 - Don't buzz her. - Don't buzz her in. 1085 00:45:12,880 --> 00:45:14,879 - I'm gonna buzz her in. - Jason, don't buzz her in. 1086 00:45:14,880 --> 00:45:15,959 - Don't buzz... - Don't buzz her in, man. 1087 00:45:15,960 --> 00:45:17,039 We're having such good guy time right now. 1088 00:45:17,040 --> 00:45:18,119 Oh, shit. 1089 00:45:18,120 --> 00:45:19,199 I just buzzed her in. 1090 00:45:19,200 --> 00:45:20,319 He fucking buzzed her in. Okay. 1091 00:45:20,320 --> 00:45:21,399 He buzzed her in. 1092 00:45:21,400 --> 00:45:22,479 - Really? - JASON: Okay. 1093 00:45:22,480 --> 00:45:23,999 Both yöu guys need to calm down. 1094 00:45:24,000 --> 00:45:26,399 We're not supposed to see them more than twice in one week, all right? 1095 00:45:26,400 --> 00:45:28,279 And yöu're seeing this chick twice in one day. 1096 00:45:28,280 --> 00:45:29,719 Dude. Relax. 1097 00:45:29,720 --> 00:45:30,879 DANIEL: Invite her up then, man! 1098 00:45:30,880 --> 00:45:32,319 She's not gonna wanna talk about Xbox. 1099 00:45:32,320 --> 00:45:34,079 So, I'm gonna be sitting here being like, 1100 00:45:34,080 --> 00:45:35,759 "I have to fart but maybe I can't right now." 1101 00:45:35,760 --> 00:45:38,119 She better have some hot friends. Dude, yöu're pissing me off. 1102 00:45:38,120 --> 00:45:41,079 Open the door. I don't care. I'm getting wasted. 1103 00:45:41,080 --> 00:45:42,279 Hey. I hope I'm not interrupting. 1104 00:45:42,280 --> 00:45:43,359 Hi. 1105 00:45:43,360 --> 00:45:46,039 No. yöu're not interrupting. yöu're not interrupting anything. 1106 00:45:46,040 --> 00:45:49,639 So this is this is Daniel. This is Mikey. We went to college together. 1107 00:45:49,640 --> 00:45:50,999 Guys, Ellie. 1108 00:45:51,000 --> 00:45:52,919 Daniel is a manipulative idiot. 1109 00:45:52,920 --> 00:45:54,039 And Mikey has an orange dick. 1110 00:45:54,040 --> 00:45:55,119 Hi. 1111 00:45:55,120 --> 00:45:56,319 Really, dude? 1112 00:45:56,320 --> 00:45:57,839 That's really good to know. 1113 00:45:57,840 --> 00:46:00,725 I brought scotch. I don't know if yöu guys drink scotch. 1114 00:46:00,880 --> 00:46:02,159 She brought scotch? 1115 00:46:02,160 --> 00:46:03,361 - yöu should try it. - Hmm! 1116 00:46:04,000 --> 00:46:05,079 Let's try it. 1117 00:46:05,080 --> 00:46:06,719 What are yöu guys playing? 1118 00:46:06,720 --> 00:46:07,799 A little Xbox. 1119 00:46:07,800 --> 00:46:09,001 Can I play? 1120 00:46:12,000 --> 00:46:13,406 (SIGHS) 1121 00:46:15,120 --> 00:46:16,401 Yeah. 1122 00:46:17,160 --> 00:46:18,566 (UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING) 1123 00:46:20,720 --> 00:46:22,206 (ALL CHEERING) 1124 00:46:40,040 --> 00:46:41,605 (INAUDIBLE) 1125 00:46:44,760 --> 00:46:46,928 Apparently, her ex-boyfriend played a lot of Halo. 1126 00:46:48,240 --> 00:46:51,159 yöu know what? It's late. I gotta go. I gotta go to West Side. 1127 00:46:51,160 --> 00:46:53,719 No, yöu're not. We're not letting yöu. No. We're not letting yöu go. 1128 00:46:53,720 --> 00:46:55,399 I promise yöu we get funnier. 1129 00:46:55,400 --> 00:46:58,599 But tonight is Mikey's night. yöu know, I can feel it. 1130 00:46:58,600 --> 00:46:59,679 MIKEY: I pray to God it is. 1131 00:46:59,680 --> 00:47:00,927 That's what I was telling yöu, too, baby. 1132 00:47:01,280 --> 00:47:04,079 I forgot to tell yöu, it's my birthday coming up soon. 1133 00:47:04,080 --> 00:47:05,199 - (GASPS) Really? - Mmm..hmm. 1134 00:47:05,200 --> 00:47:07,559 Usually people are more subtle about this. 1135 00:47:07,560 --> 00:47:08,919 (LAUGHS) 1136 00:47:08,920 --> 00:47:10,279 No, not like that. 1137 00:47:10,280 --> 00:47:13,399 I'm going to throw myself a surprise birthday party. 1138 00:47:13,400 --> 00:47:15,359 - yöu're throwing yöurself a surprise party? - Yeah. 1139 00:47:15,360 --> 00:47:16,519 - Well, I'm surprised. - Yeah, 1140 00:47:16,520 --> 00:47:18,999 everybody's gonna get dressed up and decked out. 1141 00:47:19,000 --> 00:47:20,079 And yöu should do the same. 1142 00:47:20,080 --> 00:47:21,919 - It's a dress up party? - Absolutely, yeah. 1143 00:47:21,920 --> 00:47:22,959 I'm so in. I love getting dressed up. 1144 00:47:22,960 --> 00:47:24,079 Sweet. 1145 00:47:24,080 --> 00:47:25,439 He's actually giving her eye contact? 1146 00:47:25,440 --> 00:47:26,599 He's engaged. 1147 00:47:26,600 --> 00:47:27,919 - Bye. - Bye. 1148 00:47:27,920 --> 00:47:29,839 That's a great painting, by the way. 1149 00:47:29,840 --> 00:47:31,121 Thank yöu. 1150 00:47:40,800 --> 00:47:42,639 MIKEY: (SIGHS) That's nice. It was beautiful, man. 1151 00:47:42,640 --> 00:47:44,649 - That was really nice. - That was quite nice. 1152 00:47:44,880 --> 00:47:46,439 And I do love her. I do. 1153 00:47:46,440 --> 00:47:47,839 I really like her. 1154 00:47:47,840 --> 00:47:50,599 I really liked it when she came by without telling anybody. 1155 00:47:50,600 --> 00:47:53,039 I really liked it when she kissed yöu on the cheek. 1156 00:47:53,040 --> 00:47:56,679 And I really like that yöu're about to lose this bet. 1157 00:47:56,680 --> 00:47:57,759 - Yep. - Jason, do yöu remember 1158 00:47:57,760 --> 00:47:59,479 when we said we're all gonna stay single? 1159 00:47:59,480 --> 00:48:01,039 Yeah, well, it looks like yöu're fucked. 1160 00:48:01,040 --> 00:48:02,119 I'm not fucked. 1161 00:48:02,120 --> 00:48:03,199 yöu are so fucked! 1162 00:48:03,200 --> 00:48:04,925 I'm not fucked. Let's go out. 1163 00:48:05,240 --> 00:48:06,646 (LAUGHING) 1164 00:48:07,400 --> 00:48:09,090 (INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS) 1165 00:48:10,800 --> 00:48:12,719 - Hey, Chels! - Hey. Sorry, guys. 1166 00:48:12,720 --> 00:48:14,039 Can we get tequila shots, please? 1167 00:48:14,040 --> 00:48:15,199 Sotheby's kept me late. 1168 00:48:15,200 --> 00:48:16,519 MIKEY: Then they can take care of these drinks. 1169 00:48:16,520 --> 00:48:17,799 - Oh, they will? - Hey. 1170 00:48:17,800 --> 00:48:19,923 - It's good to see yöu. - yöu, too. 1171 00:48:20,400 --> 00:48:22,479 - DANIEL: I'm still going. - JASON: That's not cool. 1172 00:48:22,480 --> 00:48:24,409 - All right cheers! - Cheers! 1173 00:48:28,880 --> 00:48:30,525 Oh, Chels, yöu're up. 1174 00:48:31,040 --> 00:48:32,526 Get it. 1175 00:48:35,600 --> 00:48:37,319 Oh, my God, I love yöur shoes. 1176 00:48:37,320 --> 00:48:40,000 Oh, thank yöu. That's so sweet. 1177 00:48:40,360 --> 00:48:41,719 That should've been me. 1178 00:48:41,720 --> 00:48:42,999 This is my friend, Daniel. 1179 00:48:43,000 --> 00:48:46,044 Hi. 1180 00:48:50,680 --> 00:48:53,724 Nice to meet yöu. 1181 00:48:58,920 --> 00:49:00,281 Okay. 1182 00:49:00,520 --> 00:49:02,051 Okay. (LAUGHS) 1183 00:49:03,360 --> 00:49:04,599 What... 1184 00:49:04,600 --> 00:49:05,881 The fuck was that? 1185 00:49:06,320 --> 00:49:07,879 Seriously. That was god awful. 1186 00:49:07,880 --> 00:49:09,039 That was horrendous. 1187 00:49:09,040 --> 00:49:10,159 I got nothing... I don't know. 1188 00:49:10,160 --> 00:49:12,439 Are yöu serious right now? yöu just dropped the ball. Seriously. 1189 00:49:12,440 --> 00:49:14,239 yöu just dropped the ball big time. 1190 00:49:14,240 --> 00:49:15,639 I'm having an off night. I don't know. 1191 00:49:15,640 --> 00:49:16,759 JASON: Having an off night? 1192 00:49:16,760 --> 00:49:18,319 Even Jordan has off nights. 1193 00:49:18,320 --> 00:49:19,559 Whoa! 1194 00:49:19,560 --> 00:49:21,250 Very ambitious. 1195 00:49:49,400 --> 00:49:50,959 What? What's wrong? 1196 00:49:50,960 --> 00:49:52,559 That teddy bear. 1197 00:49:52,560 --> 00:49:53,759 Mr. Wiggles? 1198 00:49:53,760 --> 00:49:55,599 Fuck, Mr. Wiggles. Yeah, Mr. Wiggles. 1199 00:49:55,600 --> 00:49:57,086 Because, I know, 1200 00:49:57,840 --> 00:49:59,599 yöur ex-boyfriend gave yöu that teddy bear. 1201 00:49:59,600 --> 00:50:01,799 And I said he was a pussy, which he was. 1202 00:50:01,800 --> 00:50:03,079 And then yöu broke up with him. 1203 00:50:03,080 --> 00:50:05,239 But I was thinking about yöu guys together. 1204 00:50:05,240 --> 00:50:07,279 And him having sex with yöu. And then I thought about him naked. 1205 00:50:07,280 --> 00:50:09,359 - And yöu know. And all that stuff. - Oh, really? Yeah. 1206 00:50:09,360 --> 00:50:12,643 And my boner just started to wilt like warm lettuce. 1207 00:50:12,840 --> 00:50:14,079 I'm gonna get rid of the teddy bear! 1208 00:50:14,080 --> 00:50:15,361 Thank yöu. 1209 00:50:18,160 --> 00:50:20,203 - Creeped me out. - Yeah. 1210 00:50:20,240 --> 00:50:21,439 Um... 1211 00:50:21,440 --> 00:50:23,879 Chelsea, I just really want yöu to know something. 1212 00:50:23,880 --> 00:50:25,439 And I wanted to be very clear. 1213 00:50:25,440 --> 00:50:28,723 yöu're not looking for anything serious right now? 1214 00:50:30,040 --> 00:50:33,642 Look, Daniel, this thing doesn't have to be a thing. 1215 00:50:34,280 --> 00:50:36,279 And if yöu want to go back to being friends, 1216 00:50:36,280 --> 00:50:38,199 we can go back to being friends. 1217 00:50:38,200 --> 00:50:39,999 I don't want to go back to anything. 1218 00:50:40,000 --> 00:50:42,043 That's what I was going to tell yöu. 1219 00:50:43,240 --> 00:50:45,442 I really like being here. 1220 00:50:49,720 --> 00:50:51,843 That's what I was going to say. 1221 00:50:58,760 --> 00:51:00,530 - yöu working this weekend? - Mmm..hmm. 1222 00:51:02,440 --> 00:51:04,239 yöu should come by the hospital. 1223 00:51:04,240 --> 00:51:05,319 Again. 1224 00:51:05,320 --> 00:51:06,399 Yeah. Again. 1225 00:51:06,400 --> 00:51:07,519 yöu'd like that, wouldn't yöu? 1226 00:51:07,520 --> 00:51:08,959 Yeah, I would. 1227 00:51:08,960 --> 00:51:12,209 Come by again and again and again. 1228 00:51:15,920 --> 00:51:16,999 DANIEL: Check this one out. 1229 00:51:17,000 --> 00:51:18,559 - That's impressive. - Very impressive. 1230 00:51:18,560 --> 00:51:20,046 STORE OWNER: Something for the two of yöu? 1231 00:51:20,160 --> 00:51:21,479 What's up, man? 1232 00:51:21,480 --> 00:51:22,959 Something for the two of yöu? 1233 00:51:22,960 --> 00:51:26,839 Oh, no, no, no. We're not gay, man. 1234 00:51:26,840 --> 00:51:28,719 - And we're just... - We just need a giant strap on dildo. 1235 00:51:28,720 --> 00:51:31,605 Which I know sounds a little gay. But it's for a costume. 1236 00:51:32,160 --> 00:51:35,011 It's right here. Right in front of yöu. 1237 00:51:35,360 --> 00:51:37,319 - Wait. I have a serious question for yöu. - Yeah. 1238 00:51:37,320 --> 00:51:38,679 Think. 1239 00:51:38,680 --> 00:51:40,839 If yöu were gay, would yöu date me? 1240 00:51:40,840 --> 00:51:42,199 Definitely not. 1241 00:51:42,200 --> 00:51:43,439 - What? - What? 1242 00:51:43,440 --> 00:51:45,079 I would not date yöu, Jason. 1243 00:51:45,080 --> 00:51:45,799 Why? 1244 00:51:45,800 --> 00:51:47,365 Because yöu're not my type. 1245 00:51:47,920 --> 00:51:49,119 What the fuck does that mean? 1246 00:51:49,120 --> 00:51:50,279 Oh, what? Are yöu offended? 1247 00:51:50,280 --> 00:51:51,599 I'm completely offended. 1248 00:51:51,600 --> 00:51:53,086 Deal with it. 1249 00:51:54,200 --> 00:51:56,399 yöu'd gay date me. yöu know yöu would. 1250 00:51:56,400 --> 00:51:58,599 Honestly, if were to have sex with yöu, Jason, 1251 00:51:58,600 --> 00:52:00,359 which apparently yöu really want, 1252 00:52:00,360 --> 00:52:02,679 yöu would probably be like top three hottest chicks 1253 00:52:02,680 --> 00:52:03,799 I've ever had sex with. 1254 00:52:03,800 --> 00:52:05,519 - That's actually true. - Mmm..hmm. 1255 00:52:05,520 --> 00:52:06,919 Man, how much are these? 1256 00:52:06,920 --> 00:52:08,839 For yöu? $75. 1257 00:52:08,840 --> 00:52:11,441 For me? Cause we're such good friends? 1258 00:52:12,320 --> 00:52:14,648 These are all dishwasher safe. 1259 00:52:14,840 --> 00:52:16,399 I don't think yöu should go to this party, man. 1260 00:52:16,400 --> 00:52:18,359 Dude, I can go to the party. It's gonna be fun. 1261 00:52:18,360 --> 00:52:19,439 $65. 1262 00:52:19,440 --> 00:52:22,120 Dude, who the fuck are yöu negotiating with right now? 1263 00:52:23,240 --> 00:52:24,646 $60. 1264 00:52:25,960 --> 00:52:27,479 Okay. Look. I'm telling yöu, man. 1265 00:52:27,480 --> 00:52:28,879 This party is a road to a relationship. 1266 00:52:28,880 --> 00:52:32,239 And that road is paved with responsibility and lack of selfishness. 1267 00:52:32,240 --> 00:52:34,479 And what the fuck am I holding right now? What is this? 1268 00:52:34,480 --> 00:52:35,806 I have no idea. 1269 00:52:38,520 --> 00:52:39,721 - Ah! - Clever. 1270 00:52:40,560 --> 00:52:42,319 It comes with an extra balloon. 1271 00:52:42,320 --> 00:52:43,759 Why would I need an extra balloon? 1272 00:52:43,760 --> 00:52:45,644 - In case it pops. - Why would it pop? 1273 00:52:46,480 --> 00:52:48,330 If yöu try too hard. 1274 00:52:50,240 --> 00:52:51,601 What? 1275 00:52:52,560 --> 00:52:54,888 (WALKING BACKWARDS PLAYING) 1276 00:53:06,320 --> 00:53:09,922 ♫ I was tangled in all the wires ♪ 1277 00:53:10,320 --> 00:53:13,808 ♫ Tied down, and I felt the fire ♪ 1278 00:53:14,120 --> 00:53:17,563 ♫ There was nothing for me to do ♪ 1279 00:53:17,760 --> 00:53:19,405 Sick cock, bro. 1280 00:53:19,520 --> 00:53:20,846 Thanks. 1281 00:53:23,360 --> 00:53:24,607 What's up? 1282 00:53:26,240 --> 00:53:29,523 ♫ It's flush in the face desire... ♪ 1283 00:53:31,160 --> 00:53:32,359 - Hey. - Yeah. 1284 00:53:32,360 --> 00:53:34,005 Happy birthday! 1285 00:53:34,600 --> 00:53:37,279 Jason? What are yöu wearing? 1286 00:53:37,280 --> 00:53:39,847 Rock out with my cock out. 1287 00:53:40,480 --> 00:53:42,682 It's not my real cock, though. 1288 00:53:43,400 --> 00:53:44,479 Clearly. 1289 00:53:44,480 --> 00:53:45,559 Yeah. 1290 00:53:45,560 --> 00:53:46,886 Uh... 1291 00:53:46,960 --> 00:53:48,919 So it's a different kind of dress up party? 1292 00:53:48,920 --> 00:53:49,959 Yeah. 1293 00:53:49,960 --> 00:53:54,519 This is a classic case of miscommunication. 1294 00:53:54,520 --> 00:53:55,679 It's really... It's just a classic. 1295 00:53:55,680 --> 00:53:56,961 Yeah. 1296 00:53:57,760 --> 00:53:59,689 Um... Oh. 1297 00:54:03,080 --> 00:54:04,361 Um... 1298 00:54:05,080 --> 00:54:06,884 These are my parents. 1299 00:54:07,200 --> 00:54:09,639 My mom, Jodie, and my dad, Bill. 1300 00:54:09,640 --> 00:54:10,966 Holy shit. 1301 00:54:11,160 --> 00:54:12,361 This is Jason. 1302 00:54:13,120 --> 00:54:14,679 I'm sorry. Hi. 1303 00:54:14,680 --> 00:54:16,519 I'm just gonna pretend that this isn't happening. Hi. 1304 00:54:16,520 --> 00:54:17,999 - Hello. - Hi. I'm Jason. 1305 00:54:18,000 --> 00:54:19,039 Hi. 1306 00:54:19,040 --> 00:54:20,439 - Bill. - Jason. Nice to meet yöu. 1307 00:54:20,440 --> 00:54:21,519 - Oh, goodness. - Oh! 1308 00:54:21,520 --> 00:54:22,759 That should not have happened. 1309 00:54:22,760 --> 00:54:24,319 That shouldn't have happened. 1310 00:54:24,320 --> 00:54:25,521 Yeah. 1311 00:54:27,920 --> 00:54:29,645 It's a cocktail. 1312 00:54:31,680 --> 00:54:33,245 Shouldn't have said that. 1313 00:54:33,760 --> 00:54:35,246 (BOTH CHUCKLING) 1314 00:54:35,840 --> 00:54:40,204 I'm just gonna go and check the... 1315 00:54:43,200 --> 00:54:45,004 yöu know what? Just excuse me one sec. 1316 00:55:01,640 --> 00:55:05,049 ♫ I've been looking for a new emotion ♪ 1317 00:55:08,840 --> 00:55:12,319 ♫ I've been taken with a new emotion ♪ 1318 00:55:12,320 --> 00:55:15,091 - Cheers! - (ALL CHEERING) 1319 00:55:20,920 --> 00:55:22,319 No. I got to hand it to yöu, man. 1320 00:55:22,320 --> 00:55:23,719 I'm impressed by the way yöu hung in there. 1321 00:55:23,720 --> 00:55:26,079 I should have left. I definitely should have left. 1322 00:55:26,080 --> 00:55:27,919 I guess I'm a sucker for abuse. 1323 00:55:27,920 --> 00:55:29,359 yöu must be. 1324 00:55:29,360 --> 00:55:31,559 yöu know the hardest part about this costume? 1325 00:55:31,560 --> 00:55:34,759 It was seeing this thing next to my actual dick. 1326 00:55:34,760 --> 00:55:35,959 (LAUGHS) I can only imagine. 1327 00:55:35,960 --> 00:55:39,243 I didn't know whether to cry or go kill myself. 1328 00:55:39,520 --> 00:55:41,882 What are yöu laughing at, Bill? 1329 00:55:43,080 --> 00:55:44,964 I like this guy, Ell. 1330 00:55:45,520 --> 00:55:47,210 I like this guy. 1331 00:55:48,520 --> 00:55:50,484 Don't encourage him, Dad. 1332 00:55:51,360 --> 00:55:52,971 Don't encourage him. 1333 00:55:58,200 --> 00:55:59,811 So? 1334 00:56:03,040 --> 00:56:04,480 So? 1335 00:56:06,200 --> 00:56:10,166 What do Jason and Mikey think about this? 1336 00:56:13,040 --> 00:56:14,480 What do yöu mean? 1337 00:56:14,800 --> 00:56:17,480 Well, I mean, like, whatever we're doing. 1338 00:56:18,440 --> 00:56:20,051 What have yöu told them? 1339 00:56:22,520 --> 00:56:25,007 I mean, I told them everything. 1340 00:56:25,800 --> 00:56:27,650 Yeah. They're really happy for yöu. 1341 00:56:28,200 --> 00:56:29,599 Sorry. They're happy for me? 1342 00:56:29,600 --> 00:56:30,879 They're happy for both of us. 1343 00:56:30,880 --> 00:56:33,845 They're just so happy for the two of us. 1344 00:56:34,320 --> 00:56:36,719 That's what they... Yeah, they're just really happy. 1345 00:56:36,720 --> 00:56:39,002 And Jason's taking it okay? 1346 00:56:39,240 --> 00:56:42,799 Yeah. I mean, he was a little angry at first, 1347 00:56:42,800 --> 00:56:46,083 but now he's in the fourth stage of grieving. 1348 00:56:46,200 --> 00:56:47,359 Denial? 1349 00:56:47,360 --> 00:56:49,210 Masturbation. 1350 00:56:49,760 --> 00:56:51,559 yöu know what's so cool? 1351 00:56:51,560 --> 00:56:53,999 When I'm being really serious and yöu're like, 1352 00:56:54,000 --> 00:56:56,479 "Hey, I'm Daniel. I'm, like, really funny." 1353 00:56:56,480 --> 00:56:57,919 I don't sound anything like that. 1354 00:56:57,920 --> 00:56:58,999 yöu sound exactly like that. 1355 00:56:59,000 --> 00:57:00,599 "Hey, I'm Daniel." 1356 00:57:00,600 --> 00:57:02,359 yöu sound like yöu have peanut butter in yöur mouth. 1357 00:57:02,360 --> 00:57:04,199 - No. - What do yöu want me to say? 1358 00:57:04,200 --> 00:57:06,687 They think it's cool that I'm slumming it? 1359 00:57:07,880 --> 00:57:10,321 Slumdogging? 1360 00:57:11,840 --> 00:57:15,761 No. Honestly, I'm just happy yöu told them. 1361 00:57:16,640 --> 00:57:19,081 I know how yöu are with girls. 1362 00:57:19,680 --> 00:57:21,405 Or at least how yöu've been. 1363 00:57:27,440 --> 00:57:29,404 (WON'T yöu COME HOME PLAYING) 1364 00:57:29,720 --> 00:57:31,251 yöu know what? 1365 00:57:31,520 --> 00:57:33,085 yöur dad... 1366 00:57:34,560 --> 00:57:36,000 Awesome. 1367 00:57:37,320 --> 00:57:41,081 Well, he likes yöu, too, even though yöu had that thing on. 1368 00:57:42,040 --> 00:57:44,004 Maybe that's why he liked me. 1369 00:57:46,720 --> 00:57:48,799 yöu know yöu don't have to clear up anything. 1370 00:57:48,800 --> 00:57:49,959 yöu don't have to help. 1371 00:57:49,960 --> 00:57:51,399 No, I want to. 1372 00:57:51,400 --> 00:57:53,799 yöu can't wake up to this. It's disgusting. 1373 00:57:53,800 --> 00:57:55,843 The apartment or yöu? 1374 00:57:57,360 --> 00:57:58,959 yöu've always hated me. 1375 00:57:58,960 --> 00:58:00,439 Just stop talking for one minute. 1376 00:58:00,440 --> 00:58:03,086 I know it's really hard, but yöu can just try. 1377 00:58:03,200 --> 00:58:04,731 yöu've always hated me. 1378 00:58:07,920 --> 00:58:12,284 ♫ Won't yöu come home, I surrender ♪ 1379 00:58:12,920 --> 00:58:18,570 ♫ I miss my sweet bag of bones, drunk and tender ♪ 1380 00:58:19,240 --> 00:58:24,810 ♫ Why don't yöu want to stay here suspended ♪ 1381 00:58:25,640 --> 00:58:31,131 ♫ In the dead arms of a year that has ended? ♪ 1382 00:58:40,680 --> 00:58:42,119 I'm gonna take a shower. 1383 00:58:42,120 --> 00:58:43,719 - Okay. - Okay. 1384 00:58:43,720 --> 00:58:46,810 Last night was amazing. 1385 00:58:48,280 --> 00:58:49,811 And this morning. 1386 00:58:50,320 --> 00:58:51,679 (DOOR CLOSING) 1387 00:58:51,680 --> 00:58:53,803 ELLIE: Do yöu think yöu could grow old in New York? 1388 00:58:54,040 --> 00:58:56,079 I'm not gonna get old. 1389 00:58:56,080 --> 00:58:57,879 Getting old looks so tiring. 1390 00:58:57,880 --> 00:59:00,439 I know. yöu just, like, wake up in the morning 1391 00:59:00,440 --> 00:59:03,119 and have to figure out what to do in between meals. 1392 00:59:03,120 --> 00:59:04,599 I'll tell yöu what I'm gonna do. 1393 00:59:04,600 --> 00:59:08,719 I'm gonna get an old Jaguar XK-E, completely restored. 1394 00:59:08,720 --> 00:59:10,922 And then I'm gonna eat a ton of acid. 1395 00:59:11,280 --> 00:59:14,359 Like, so much acid that if yöu went to go see Cirque du Soleil, 1396 00:59:14,360 --> 00:59:16,359 yöu'd think yöu were in Connecticut. 1397 00:59:16,360 --> 00:59:17,891 (LAUGHING) 1398 00:59:18,320 --> 00:59:20,319 And then I'm gonna speed up the West Side Highway, 1399 00:59:20,320 --> 00:59:23,639 as fast as a car can go, crash through the divider, 1400 00:59:23,640 --> 00:59:25,799 and careen off into the Hudson. 1401 00:59:25,800 --> 00:59:27,599 In slow motion, of course. 1402 00:59:27,600 --> 00:59:29,079 Of course. 1403 00:59:29,080 --> 00:59:30,639 And that would be it. 1404 00:59:30,640 --> 00:59:33,207 My death, premeditated. 1405 00:59:33,960 --> 00:59:35,039 Okay. 1406 00:59:35,040 --> 00:59:37,159 I mean, here's what's actually gonna happen. 1407 00:59:37,160 --> 00:59:38,879 What? 1408 00:59:38,880 --> 00:59:41,239 yöu'll be 70 years old. 1409 00:59:41,240 --> 00:59:43,239 So yöu'll think yöu're going 150, 1410 00:59:43,240 --> 00:59:45,679 but actually yöu're going 25 at best, 15 at worst. 1411 00:59:45,680 --> 00:59:48,799 yöu can't see, so the acid yöu think yöu're eating 1412 00:59:48,800 --> 00:59:50,519 will actually be an errant Lipitor. 1413 00:59:50,520 --> 00:59:53,079 yöu're going to forget what yöu were doing in the car in the first place, 1414 00:59:53,080 --> 00:59:55,159 bump into the divider, wet yöurself, ruin the car, 1415 00:59:55,160 --> 00:59:57,519 lose yöur license, and yöur dignity in one fell swoop. 1416 00:59:57,520 --> 01:00:00,279 And then yöu're gonna be ushered off into some rest home, 1417 01:00:00,280 --> 01:00:01,359 where yöu have to wake up in the mornings, 1418 01:00:01,360 --> 01:00:04,211 and figure out what the hell to do in between meals. 1419 01:00:05,520 --> 01:00:09,202 yöu know, yöu don't have to be right about everything all the time? 1420 01:00:18,880 --> 01:00:20,206 DANIEL: How's Ellie? 1421 01:00:20,280 --> 01:00:22,244 (DANCE MUSIC PLAYING) 1422 01:00:23,200 --> 01:00:24,519 What do yöu mean? 1423 01:00:24,520 --> 01:00:25,639 What do yöu mean what do I mean? 1424 01:00:25,640 --> 01:00:27,719 Nothing. What are yöu talking about? 1425 01:00:27,720 --> 01:00:30,799 (CHUCKLES) What are yöu talking about? So? What's up? 1426 01:00:30,800 --> 01:00:32,331 Nothing. Where's Chelsea? 1427 01:00:32,880 --> 01:00:33,999 What do yöu mean? 1428 01:00:34,000 --> 01:00:37,010 I mean, where is Chelsea is what I mean. 1429 01:00:39,400 --> 01:00:41,039 I gotta talk to yöu about Chelsea. 1430 01:00:41,040 --> 01:00:42,651 ALL: Oh! 1431 01:00:44,240 --> 01:00:45,441 What's going on? 1432 01:00:46,520 --> 01:00:48,279 - Why are yöu so happy? - Yeah? 1433 01:00:48,280 --> 01:00:50,199 I can't be happy to see my two best friends? 1434 01:00:50,200 --> 01:00:51,879 That's not a happy to see yöur two best friends face. 1435 01:00:51,880 --> 01:00:53,286 No? 1436 01:00:53,840 --> 01:00:55,079 What is going on? 1437 01:00:55,080 --> 01:00:56,639 yöu're girl happy. 1438 01:00:56,640 --> 01:00:58,719 Look at me. Did yöu bone again? 1439 01:00:58,720 --> 01:00:59,999 yöu boned again, didn't yöu? 1440 01:01:00,000 --> 01:01:01,079 - No. What are yöu... - Did yöu? 1441 01:01:01,080 --> 01:01:03,559 No. That's ridiculous. Can yöu stop looking at me like that? 1442 01:01:03,560 --> 01:01:05,239 - yöu're a fucking animal! Yes, yöu did! - Did yöu? 1443 01:01:05,240 --> 01:01:06,679 Did yöu? Hmm? 1444 01:01:06,680 --> 01:01:07,759 Who was it? Glasses girl? 1445 01:01:07,760 --> 01:01:08,879 Was it? 1446 01:01:08,880 --> 01:01:10,319 - Glasses girl. - Was it? 1447 01:01:10,320 --> 01:01:11,760 BOTH: Hey! Oh! 1448 01:01:12,960 --> 01:01:14,439 Wow. Mikey. 1449 01:01:14,440 --> 01:01:16,399 It's the beginning of a beautiful roster, buddy. 1450 01:01:16,400 --> 01:01:17,759 - Yeah, man. - I'm proud of yöu. I'm proud of yöu. 1451 01:01:17,760 --> 01:01:19,079 - Thank yöu. - I'm also proud of yöu. 1452 01:01:19,080 --> 01:01:20,921 - (CELL PHONE RINGING) - yöur phone is ringing. 1453 01:01:22,920 --> 01:01:24,879 - Are yöu going to answer that? - No. 1454 01:01:24,880 --> 01:01:26,359 - Mmm. - yöu should. It might be a hot 1455 01:01:26,360 --> 01:01:27,599 lonely girl looking to talk to me, 1456 01:01:27,600 --> 01:01:29,159 - but she has yöur number. - (RINGING CONTINUES) 1457 01:01:29,160 --> 01:01:30,519 - No. It's Ellie. - No, it's not. 1458 01:01:30,520 --> 01:01:31,679 I can read it. It's right there on the bar. 1459 01:01:31,680 --> 01:01:33,803 It says, "Ellie." See that? 1460 01:01:34,760 --> 01:01:35,919 I'll get it later. 1461 01:01:35,920 --> 01:01:37,119 That's real mature. 1462 01:01:37,120 --> 01:01:38,159 Yeah. yöu should answer it, 1463 01:01:38,160 --> 01:01:39,439 because she's yöur girlfriend. 1464 01:01:39,440 --> 01:01:41,359 It's... Yeah. My girlfriend. 1465 01:01:41,360 --> 01:01:43,039 - (CELL PHONE RINGING) - MIKEY: Oh, shit. She's calling again. 1466 01:01:43,040 --> 01:01:44,119 Back to back? 1467 01:01:44,120 --> 01:01:46,799 Answer that phone! She might need yöu to pick up diapers! 1468 01:01:46,800 --> 01:01:48,199 Or, like, tampons, or something like that. 1469 01:01:48,200 --> 01:01:49,839 I'm out with yöu guys. I'm not fucking answering it. 1470 01:01:49,840 --> 01:01:51,079 - Well, I'm gonna answer it. - I wish I wasn't. 1471 01:01:51,080 --> 01:01:54,799 Hey, Ellie! What's up? No, it's Daniel. It's Jason's best man. 1472 01:01:54,800 --> 01:01:56,279 - He just crossed a line. - It's his best man friend. 1473 01:01:56,280 --> 01:01:57,839 - Best man? What are yöu talking about? - Uh..huh. Yeah. 1474 01:01:57,840 --> 01:01:59,679 All right. Here he is. Here he is. 1475 01:01:59,680 --> 01:02:01,239 - Hi. - Hi. 1476 01:02:01,240 --> 01:02:03,159 - Hello. - All strong army. yöu wanna strong arm me? 1477 01:02:03,160 --> 01:02:04,691 He gets so angry. 1478 01:02:05,320 --> 01:02:06,851 Yeah. Hello? 1479 01:02:07,080 --> 01:02:08,520 I can hear yöu. 1480 01:02:12,640 --> 01:02:14,046 Ellie? 1481 01:02:16,320 --> 01:02:18,319 - Oh, my God. - What? What's up? 1482 01:02:18,320 --> 01:02:20,329 Her dad just died. 1483 01:02:21,880 --> 01:02:23,241 Her dad died. 1484 01:02:36,680 --> 01:02:38,839 yöu have to. It's not even a question. 1485 01:02:38,840 --> 01:02:39,999 yöu have to show up at that funeral. 1486 01:02:40,000 --> 01:02:42,119 If I set foot anywhere near that funeral, then we're dating. 1487 01:02:42,120 --> 01:02:43,159 Then don't go, dude. 1488 01:02:43,160 --> 01:02:45,639 What the fuck are yöu talking about? 1489 01:02:45,640 --> 01:02:46,919 If he doesn't want to go to the funeral, 1490 01:02:46,920 --> 01:02:48,199 why should he go to the funeral? 1491 01:02:48,200 --> 01:02:50,399 Are yöu not a human being? Do yöu not have a soul? 1492 01:02:50,400 --> 01:02:51,879 Technically, she didn't even invite me. 1493 01:02:51,880 --> 01:02:54,639 Technically? She has to invite yöu to a funeral? 1494 01:02:54,640 --> 01:02:56,839 Yeah. What, he's supposed to show up and say, 1495 01:02:56,840 --> 01:02:59,879 "Hey. I'm Jason. I'm actually fucking the dead guy's daughter"? 1496 01:02:59,880 --> 01:03:01,359 What're yöu talking about? 1497 01:03:01,360 --> 01:03:02,879 If anything, I'm just gonna be a distraction. 1498 01:03:02,880 --> 01:03:04,119 It's like... 1499 01:03:04,120 --> 01:03:05,239 It's better than being an asshole. Okay? 1500 01:03:05,240 --> 01:03:06,639 It's better than being an asshole. 1501 01:03:06,640 --> 01:03:08,968 (INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS) 1502 01:03:16,720 --> 01:03:18,922 I know. I wish I could be home, too. 1503 01:03:19,880 --> 01:03:22,845 Next year. I promise. But happy Thanksgiving. 1504 01:03:28,760 --> 01:03:30,291 I miss yöu, too. 1505 01:03:30,920 --> 01:03:33,202 Tell Dad I say hello. 1506 01:03:35,080 --> 01:03:36,441 I love yöu, too. 1507 01:03:38,240 --> 01:03:39,719 Yeah, no. Take yöur time. Take yöur time. 1508 01:03:39,720 --> 01:03:43,811 I'll be here. Finishing up. Ah, yeah. 1509 01:03:46,640 --> 01:03:48,729 Here. That's set. 1510 01:04:10,880 --> 01:04:12,684 (KNOCKING ON DOOR) 1511 01:04:13,520 --> 01:04:14,599 - Oh! - Hey. 1512 01:04:14,600 --> 01:04:15,919 I'm so glad yöu came. 1513 01:04:15,920 --> 01:04:17,319 yöu look great. 1514 01:04:17,320 --> 01:04:19,159 yöu look great. Nice flowers. 1515 01:04:19,160 --> 01:04:21,799 Thank yöu. They're not for yöu. They're for yöur grandma. 1516 01:04:21,800 --> 01:04:23,719 - Grandma. - There yöu go. 1517 01:04:23,720 --> 01:04:26,399 I picked them myself on the way over. No big deal. 1518 01:04:26,400 --> 01:04:28,279 God. She is so sweet. 1519 01:04:28,280 --> 01:04:29,559 I see where yöu get yöur looks from. 1520 01:04:29,560 --> 01:04:30,639 - Shameless of yöu. - Yeah. 1521 01:04:30,640 --> 01:04:32,159 What? I'm not trying to have sex with yöur grandma. 1522 01:04:32,160 --> 01:04:33,239 Ew. Gross. 1523 01:04:33,240 --> 01:04:34,759 Unless yöu think she's into it. 1524 01:04:34,760 --> 01:04:36,439 - Don't think she's... - Then maybe I will. Grandma! 1525 01:04:36,440 --> 01:04:37,919 - Don't... He may be into it. - I'm just kidding. 1526 01:04:37,920 --> 01:04:38,959 All right. I'm just saying. 1527 01:04:38,960 --> 01:04:41,639 Like, in two generations I could be responsible for making yöu again. 1528 01:04:41,640 --> 01:04:42,959 - Okay. - It's called science. 1529 01:04:42,960 --> 01:04:44,650 It's called disgusting. 1530 01:04:45,960 --> 01:04:48,199 So are Mikey and Jason coming? 1531 01:04:48,200 --> 01:04:51,006 No, I don't think they're gonna make it this year. 1532 01:04:55,040 --> 01:04:57,368 Oh, babe, I'm so sorry. I know I'm late. 1533 01:04:57,480 --> 01:04:58,639 Traffic was awful. 1534 01:04:58,640 --> 01:04:59,679 It's a holiday. 1535 01:04:59,680 --> 01:05:01,041 (SIGHS) Hi. 1536 01:05:04,040 --> 01:05:06,439 Oh, the turkey looks beautiful! 1537 01:05:06,440 --> 01:05:08,529 And yöu got the red I like. 1538 01:05:09,080 --> 01:05:10,839 I made everything just how yöu like it. 1539 01:05:10,840 --> 01:05:12,451 I know yöu did. 1540 01:05:13,800 --> 01:05:15,519 Mmm. This red is so smooth. 1541 01:05:15,520 --> 01:05:18,159 I don't know. it feels a little off balance to me. 1542 01:05:18,160 --> 01:05:19,850 Yeah? What do yöu mean? 1543 01:05:20,560 --> 01:05:23,047 I don't know. Like something doesn't belong. 1544 01:05:24,520 --> 01:05:26,679 Maybe it needs to breathe a little. 1545 01:05:26,680 --> 01:05:28,119 It has, like, a chocolate undertone. 1546 01:05:28,120 --> 01:05:30,607 Maybe yöu're just reacting to that flavor. 1547 01:05:31,080 --> 01:05:34,682 Or maybe 'cause yöu're still fucking Harold. I can't tell. 1548 01:05:35,840 --> 01:05:37,679 yöu know his jacket is still in the closet? 1549 01:05:37,680 --> 01:05:39,599 It's a great jacket. Why's it in the fucking closet? 1550 01:05:39,600 --> 01:05:41,159 Can we please just enjoy this? 1551 01:05:41,160 --> 01:05:43,359 I've been trying to pretend that things haven't changed. 1552 01:05:43,360 --> 01:05:44,479 Things have changed. 1553 01:05:44,480 --> 01:05:46,125 Then what are we doing? 1554 01:05:47,040 --> 01:05:48,605 What are we doing? 1555 01:05:51,360 --> 01:05:53,519 We're having fun. I don't know. 1556 01:05:53,520 --> 01:05:55,085 "I don't know"? 1557 01:05:57,080 --> 01:05:58,281 That's it? 1558 01:05:58,960 --> 01:06:00,810 "I don't know"? 1559 01:06:02,360 --> 01:06:03,959 We had everything we wanted. 1560 01:06:03,960 --> 01:06:05,559 A great apartment. A great job. 1561 01:06:05,560 --> 01:06:07,279 yöu're making partner in a year. I'm in the ER. 1562 01:06:07,280 --> 01:06:08,479 We checked each other's boxes! 1563 01:06:08,480 --> 01:06:10,364 Why didn't we ever talk about kids? 1564 01:06:12,800 --> 01:06:16,721 It's because neither of us saw that future and yöu know that's true. 1565 01:06:25,800 --> 01:06:27,411 Maybe I should go. 1566 01:06:36,880 --> 01:06:38,286 (DOOR CLOSES) 1567 01:06:39,960 --> 01:06:41,286 (SIGHS) 1568 01:06:50,160 --> 01:06:52,124 I just need to hear yöu say it. 1569 01:06:53,640 --> 01:06:55,126 Just say it. 1570 01:07:03,520 --> 01:07:05,802 I don't love yöu anymore. 1571 01:07:19,320 --> 01:07:20,681 (CHIMES) 1572 01:07:28,160 --> 01:07:30,839 So, I said to Paul, after our first lunch downtown, 1573 01:07:30,840 --> 01:07:33,399 I thought yöu two would be perfect for one another. 1574 01:07:33,400 --> 01:07:34,479 Mom. 1575 01:07:34,480 --> 01:07:36,279 Susan, to be honest, I feel like I'd be perfect with anybody. 1576 01:07:36,280 --> 01:07:37,639 yöu know, for yöur daughter, it was just right place 1577 01:07:37,640 --> 01:07:38,879 - at the right time. - Aw! 1578 01:07:38,880 --> 01:07:40,809 yöu know, like working at Google. 1579 01:07:40,960 --> 01:07:42,605 yöu've got a job at Google? 1580 01:07:42,640 --> 01:07:44,839 No. I was just... yöu know, that's not... 1581 01:07:44,840 --> 01:07:46,239 - Possible. - Right. 1582 01:07:46,240 --> 01:07:49,922 Daddy, Daniel was actually just telling Mom that he was too good for me. 1583 01:07:50,160 --> 01:07:51,999 - No. Daniel wasn't. - Was that right? 1584 01:07:52,000 --> 01:07:54,159 Now there, yöu're... Well, yöu're taking it out of context, sir. 1585 01:07:54,160 --> 01:07:56,399 It's the other way around. I'm very lucky. 1586 01:07:56,400 --> 01:08:00,400 Well, calm down, Daniel. We know yöu're not too good for Chelsea. 1587 01:08:00,840 --> 01:08:02,439 - Paul? - Dad? 1588 01:08:02,440 --> 01:08:04,799 And well, we are very happy to have yöu here. 1589 01:08:04,800 --> 01:08:07,810 I've got 3 grand on the Cowboys. I could use a drinking buddy. 1590 01:08:07,920 --> 01:08:09,690 Yeah, I'd love a drink right now. 1591 01:08:10,320 --> 01:08:11,965 - Let's get a drink! - Okay, great. 1592 01:08:13,320 --> 01:08:14,885 yöu scared them away. 1593 01:08:45,280 --> 01:08:46,606 Thanks. 1594 01:09:08,760 --> 01:09:10,086 What? 1595 01:09:10,920 --> 01:09:12,804 (CLASSICAL MUSIC PLAYING) 1596 01:09:13,120 --> 01:09:16,085 (INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS) 1597 01:09:23,120 --> 01:09:24,239 Oh. 1598 01:09:24,240 --> 01:09:26,279 I have wanted to rip yöur clothes off 1599 01:09:26,280 --> 01:09:28,239 ever since yöu walked into this party. 1600 01:09:28,240 --> 01:09:31,762 Oh, my God, Grandma! yöur hands smell like stuffing! 1601 01:09:36,840 --> 01:09:39,479 Wait, wait. I don't know. Should we do this right now? 1602 01:09:39,480 --> 01:09:40,879 What, yöu're gonna say no to sex? 1603 01:09:40,880 --> 01:09:42,359 No. I love sex. I love sex with yöu. 1604 01:09:42,360 --> 01:09:45,599 But I'm saying, like, cause yöur family's out there and stuff. 1605 01:09:45,600 --> 01:09:46,919 - Oh, yeah. - And yöur dad is kind of... 1606 01:09:46,920 --> 01:09:50,363 yöu know what? Maybe stop being such a pussy. 1607 01:09:52,120 --> 01:09:53,560 Okay. 1608 01:10:05,240 --> 01:10:06,805 (BOTH MOANING) 1609 01:10:13,680 --> 01:10:15,291 (DOOR CLOSING) 1610 01:10:20,680 --> 01:10:22,479 (WHISPERING) Did yöu lock the door? 1611 01:10:22,480 --> 01:10:24,011 (WHISPERING) I think so. 1612 01:10:24,680 --> 01:10:26,559 yöu think so or yöu know so? 1613 01:10:26,560 --> 01:10:28,319 yöu came in after me. yöu should have locked it. 1614 01:10:28,320 --> 01:10:29,601 Shh! Quiet. 1615 01:10:29,960 --> 01:10:31,446 (URINATING) 1616 01:10:33,360 --> 01:10:36,211 I think it's yöur grandma. She's coming for me. 1617 01:10:37,680 --> 01:10:39,799 I knew I shouldn't have given her those flowers. 1618 01:10:39,800 --> 01:10:41,684 She's coming for me. 1619 01:10:53,360 --> 01:10:55,119 Jesus. What the fuck? 1620 01:10:55,120 --> 01:10:56,199 - Okay. Hey. - Oh, my God! 1621 01:10:56,200 --> 01:10:57,359 Hey, dude. 1622 01:10:57,360 --> 01:10:58,519 What the fuck are yöu doing in here? 1623 01:10:58,520 --> 01:10:59,679 Don't look at my fucking dick, man! 1624 01:10:59,680 --> 01:11:01,479 Oh, my God. yöu guys are fucking? 1625 01:11:01,480 --> 01:11:02,599 It doesn't mean what yöu think it means. 1626 01:11:02,600 --> 01:11:03,679 - CHELSEA: Oh, it doesn't? - It doesn't? 1627 01:11:03,680 --> 01:11:04,999 No. it doesn't mean that. 1628 01:11:05,000 --> 01:11:07,039 Oh, what does our relationship mean to yöu, Daniel? 1629 01:11:07,040 --> 01:11:09,239 Relationship? yöu guys are in a relationship? 1630 01:11:09,240 --> 01:11:10,559 yöu didn't tell him? 1631 01:11:10,560 --> 01:11:12,359 yöu told me yöu told him! yöu fucking lied to me. 1632 01:11:12,360 --> 01:11:16,319 What I should have said in this situation was that I didn't. 1633 01:11:16,320 --> 01:11:17,519 - Oh, of course. - I didn't tell him. 1634 01:11:17,520 --> 01:11:18,719 Jesus Christ, Daniel. 1635 01:11:18,720 --> 01:11:19,839 We're not dating, okay? If that's what... 1636 01:11:19,840 --> 01:11:21,804 Oh, my God. Fuck yöu. 1637 01:11:22,200 --> 01:11:23,359 What the fuck? 1638 01:11:23,360 --> 01:11:24,519 - What the fuck? - What the fuck? 1639 01:11:24,520 --> 01:11:26,119 What the fuck is right! What are yöu doing here? 1640 01:11:26,120 --> 01:11:27,759 Jesus! Does no one in this house lock a door? 1641 01:11:27,760 --> 01:11:29,839 - Where are yöu coming from? - I was with Vera. 1642 01:11:29,840 --> 01:11:31,159 - What the fuck? - What the fuck? 1643 01:11:31,160 --> 01:11:32,199 yöur ex-wife? 1644 01:11:32,200 --> 01:11:33,639 Why were yöu with Vera? 1645 01:11:33,640 --> 01:11:34,959 Cause I was trying to work it out. 1646 01:11:34,960 --> 01:11:36,366 But it's over now. 1647 01:11:36,600 --> 01:11:38,165 - MIKEY: Oh, my God. - Hey, man. 1648 01:11:38,360 --> 01:11:39,959 - Do not hug me with no pants on. - Bring it here. 1649 01:11:39,960 --> 01:11:41,399 Do not hug me with no pants on. 1650 01:11:41,400 --> 01:11:43,079 yöu're right. Respect. Respect. 1651 01:11:43,080 --> 01:11:44,799 What were yöu doing trying to work it out with Vera? 1652 01:11:44,800 --> 01:11:47,399 Because that's what I do, Jason. I try to make things work. 1653 01:11:47,400 --> 01:11:48,719 But yöu wouldn't know anything about that 1654 01:11:48,720 --> 01:11:49,919 cause yöu always playing shit safe. 1655 01:11:49,920 --> 01:11:51,159 No. Because we had a deal. 1656 01:11:51,160 --> 01:11:52,999 - We were staying single. - CHELSEA: Wait. Single? 1657 01:11:53,000 --> 01:11:54,199 It's a long story. We'll talk about it later. 1658 01:11:54,200 --> 01:11:55,959 I didn't go to a funeral. yöu both lied to me 1659 01:11:55,960 --> 01:11:58,279 I did that for yöu. I did that for both of yöu. 1660 01:11:58,280 --> 01:12:00,399 Wait, wait, wait. yöu didn't do any of this shit for us. 1661 01:12:00,400 --> 01:12:01,919 yöu do everything for yöu. 1662 01:12:01,920 --> 01:12:03,679 yöu want us to be just like Jason. 1663 01:12:03,680 --> 01:12:06,879 And I can't think of anything I want more than to be nothing like yöu. 1664 01:12:06,880 --> 01:12:09,399 yöur wife fucked some other dude and yöu're mad at me. 1665 01:12:09,400 --> 01:12:10,559 Whoa, man. 1666 01:12:10,560 --> 01:12:11,679 yöu wanna say that again? 1667 01:12:11,680 --> 01:12:13,689 - She might still be fucking this dude. - Oh! 1668 01:12:13,720 --> 01:12:16,279 Stop it. yöu guys, stop it! Get the fuck out! 1669 01:12:16,280 --> 01:12:17,399 Stop. Come on, man. 1670 01:12:17,400 --> 01:12:18,919 - yöur dick is touching me, man! - I'm sorry. 1671 01:12:18,920 --> 01:12:20,799 yöu know what? Fuck yöu guys! 1672 01:12:20,800 --> 01:12:23,719 I can go back to my life! My roster, my fun! 1673 01:12:23,720 --> 01:12:25,999 All my shit! And do it without yöu! 1674 01:12:26,000 --> 01:12:29,363 Okay? We weren't getting into relationships! That was the deal! 1675 01:12:30,080 --> 01:12:31,439 It really wasn't about anything other than 1676 01:12:31,440 --> 01:12:34,239 having my two best friends and I back together again. 1677 01:12:34,240 --> 01:12:35,479 That was it. 1678 01:12:35,480 --> 01:12:37,523 Now look at the shit yöu guys are in! 1679 01:12:37,680 --> 01:12:39,325 yöu're a sad man. 1680 01:12:40,120 --> 01:12:42,322 Yeah. Fuck yöu, Mikey. 1681 01:12:44,520 --> 01:12:45,721 Oh, wow. 1682 01:12:47,720 --> 01:12:49,399 Happy Thanksgiving, everyone. 1683 01:12:49,400 --> 01:12:51,489 Such a special time of year. 1684 01:12:54,400 --> 01:12:57,206 (STILL LIFE PLAYING) 1685 01:13:10,520 --> 01:13:16,204 ♫ Under a sky no one sees ♪ 1686 01:13:16,800 --> 01:13:21,688 ♫ Waiting, watching it happening ♪ 1687 01:13:22,680 --> 01:13:27,568 ♫ Don't hurry Give it time ♪ 1688 01:13:28,320 --> 01:13:33,287 ♫ Things are the way they have to be ♪ 1689 01:13:34,000 --> 01:13:38,364 ♫ Slow down Give it time ♪ 1690 01:13:39,600 --> 01:13:44,761 ♫ Still life yöu know I'm listening ♪ 1691 01:13:44,920 --> 01:13:50,843 ♫ The moment that yöu want is coming if yöu give it time ♪ 1692 01:13:54,920 --> 01:14:00,650 ♫ When yöu wake up When yöu wake up ♪ 1693 01:14:00,840 --> 01:14:03,725 ♫ yöu will find me ♪ 1694 01:14:06,440 --> 01:14:11,771 ♫ When yöu wake up When yöu wake up ♪ 1695 01:14:12,160 --> 01:14:14,328 ♫ yöu will find me ♪ 1696 01:14:15,600 --> 01:14:16,926 Ellie? 1697 01:14:17,200 --> 01:14:19,801 Hey. 1698 01:14:20,720 --> 01:14:22,119 Hey, look, I'd love to. 1699 01:14:22,120 --> 01:14:23,199 Love to what? 1700 01:14:23,200 --> 01:14:25,559 Get a coffee. Talk for a few hours. 1701 01:14:25,560 --> 01:14:26,719 Get a drink after. Maybe some tequila? 1702 01:14:26,720 --> 01:14:27,879 Jason. 1703 01:14:27,880 --> 01:14:28,919 What? Is that not what yöu just said? 1704 01:14:28,920 --> 01:14:30,839 I could have sworn I just heard yöu say that yöu wanted to... 1705 01:14:30,840 --> 01:14:31,959 Jason. 1706 01:14:31,960 --> 01:14:33,241 What? 1707 01:14:41,800 --> 01:14:44,002 yöu weren't there for me. 1708 01:14:45,240 --> 01:14:48,603 On a day when I really, really needed yöu. 1709 01:14:52,360 --> 01:14:55,239 And being there for someone when they need yöu? 1710 01:14:55,240 --> 01:15:00,321 That's all relationships are, Jason. 1711 01:15:04,080 --> 01:15:05,611 That's all they are. 1712 01:16:13,400 --> 01:16:15,045 yöu Okay? 1713 01:16:17,160 --> 01:16:18,600 Yeah, I'm fine. 1714 01:16:26,480 --> 01:16:28,409 I just can't... 1715 01:16:30,320 --> 01:16:32,807 Can't stop thinking about what she's doing. 1716 01:16:33,520 --> 01:16:35,165 Like, when I'm not there. 1717 01:16:38,520 --> 01:16:41,121 I know what the couch looks like at her place. 1718 01:16:43,720 --> 01:16:45,519 I just can't stop imagining the different 1719 01:16:45,520 --> 01:16:48,405 people that are all sitting on it. 1720 01:16:50,480 --> 01:16:52,011 A guy. 1721 01:16:53,040 --> 01:16:54,571 A different guy. 1722 01:16:55,120 --> 01:16:56,560 A new guy. 1723 01:16:58,440 --> 01:17:00,324 Just every guy but me. 1724 01:17:01,280 --> 01:17:03,164 Sitting on that couch. 1725 01:17:06,200 --> 01:17:07,765 Well, 1726 01:17:10,040 --> 01:17:13,323 it sounds to me like yöu just need to get laid. 1727 01:17:20,520 --> 01:17:21,879 (BOTH MOANING) 1728 01:17:21,880 --> 01:17:23,399 I know this is gonna sound crazy. 1729 01:17:23,400 --> 01:17:24,599 - Then don't say it. - No. 1730 01:17:24,600 --> 01:17:28,719 This is gonna sound even more crazy, given the new information. 1731 01:17:28,720 --> 01:17:30,160 - Shh. - No, listen. 1732 01:17:33,720 --> 01:17:35,119 I'm sorry. I can't do this. 1733 01:17:35,120 --> 01:17:36,651 Wow. What? 1734 01:17:39,920 --> 01:17:42,726 I'm just still getting over someone. 1735 01:17:42,920 --> 01:17:45,521 Come on. yöu're gonna go full girl with it? 1736 01:17:46,320 --> 01:17:49,967 I think I made a terrible mistake. 1737 01:17:51,360 --> 01:17:53,399 I know I can be selfish, arrogant, 1738 01:17:53,400 --> 01:17:55,439 distant and emotionally retarded. 1739 01:17:55,440 --> 01:17:57,039 I'm just gonna stop yöu right there because 1740 01:17:57,040 --> 01:18:01,119 whatever it is that yöu're doing right now is not what we do. 1741 01:18:01,120 --> 01:18:03,759 I just needed somebody to talk to. 1742 01:18:03,760 --> 01:18:05,200 Jason? 1743 01:18:05,440 --> 01:18:07,688 Don't yöu have any friends? 1744 01:18:19,920 --> 01:18:21,360 (DOOR CLOSING) 1745 01:18:39,280 --> 01:18:41,084 These actually do go together. 1746 01:18:41,960 --> 01:18:43,685 Didn't see that coming. 1747 01:18:46,400 --> 01:18:47,840 I'm sorry. 1748 01:18:48,720 --> 01:18:50,001 I know. 1749 01:18:55,960 --> 01:18:57,079 I just... 1750 01:18:57,080 --> 01:18:58,399 I don't know, to be honest, I'm having 1751 01:18:58,400 --> 01:18:59,639 so much fun hanging out, yöu know, 1752 01:18:59,640 --> 01:19:02,366 and chasing girls. And doing the thing and... 1753 01:19:02,920 --> 01:19:04,439 - "Doing the thing"? - Yeah, I miss that. 1754 01:19:04,440 --> 01:19:06,279 And I'm not gonna be able to do that if I'm with Chelsea. 1755 01:19:06,280 --> 01:19:07,599 yöu know that. 1756 01:19:07,600 --> 01:19:08,879 I know. 1757 01:19:08,880 --> 01:19:10,286 Okay. 1758 01:19:12,400 --> 01:19:13,999 Go tell her how yöu feel. 1759 01:19:14,000 --> 01:19:15,159 Go make a scene. 1760 01:19:15,160 --> 01:19:16,279 Yeah. 1761 01:19:16,280 --> 01:19:18,119 - Make a public spectacle. - Yeah. 1762 01:19:18,120 --> 01:19:20,159 Dude. Go big. Do it like the movies. 1763 01:19:20,160 --> 01:19:21,239 Like the movies. Yeah. 1764 01:19:21,240 --> 01:19:22,559 - Like Jerry Maguire. - I love that movie. 1765 01:19:22,560 --> 01:19:24,039 - I love that movie, man! - So good. 1766 01:19:24,040 --> 01:19:25,439 - "yöu had me at hello." - What? 1767 01:19:25,440 --> 01:19:26,959 - Don't ever do that again. Okay - Sorry. 1768 01:19:26,960 --> 01:19:28,439 But tell me what yöu love about her, man! 1769 01:19:28,440 --> 01:19:30,039 - What do yöu love about her? - I love the way she laughs. 1770 01:19:30,040 --> 01:19:32,639 I like the way she fake laughs when she knows that I need it. 1771 01:19:32,640 --> 01:19:33,839 Yes. 1772 01:19:33,840 --> 01:19:34,959 I love the way we fit together in bed. 1773 01:19:34,960 --> 01:19:37,079 Because we're the same height, our crotches line up perfectly. 1774 01:19:37,080 --> 01:19:38,159 That's really good. 1775 01:19:38,160 --> 01:19:39,479 I love that about it! 1776 01:19:39,480 --> 01:19:40,679 I mean, what are the chances, right? 1777 01:19:40,680 --> 01:19:43,999 I love the way that she looks in the morning. 1778 01:19:44,000 --> 01:19:45,879 Like at that exact moment when she wakes up, 1779 01:19:45,880 --> 01:19:47,879 and her eyes just open like two little butterflies. 1780 01:19:47,880 --> 01:19:49,239 - Two little... - I love that! 1781 01:19:49,240 --> 01:19:50,359 I love that! 1782 01:19:50,360 --> 01:19:51,719 - Yeah, man. - But I wouldn't go there. 1783 01:19:51,720 --> 01:19:53,359 - Yeah, I wouldn't do that. - Okay. 1784 01:19:53,360 --> 01:19:54,559 - So run and tell her that. - I'm gonna go. 1785 01:19:54,560 --> 01:19:56,199 Don't go all Notebook with it. But run and tell her that. 1786 01:19:56,200 --> 01:19:57,519 - I'm doing it. - Do it. 1787 01:19:57,520 --> 01:19:58,599 - I'm doing it. - Do it, man. 1788 01:19:58,600 --> 01:19:59,799 - I'm going. - Let's do it. 1789 01:19:59,800 --> 01:20:00,879 I'm gonna do it! 1790 01:20:00,880 --> 01:20:02,081 Man, yöu're doing it! 1791 01:20:02,520 --> 01:20:04,159 - (HORN HONKING) - Oh, shit! 1792 01:20:04,160 --> 01:20:06,044 Oh, my God! 1793 01:20:06,320 --> 01:20:08,045 - Dude? - MAN: Someone call 911! 1794 01:20:10,800 --> 01:20:14,479 yöu took, like, four bags of fluid. yöu were severely dehydrated. 1795 01:20:14,480 --> 01:20:15,841 Oop! 1796 01:20:15,920 --> 01:20:17,929 - yöu need to be housebroken. - (KNOCKING ON DOOR) 1797 01:20:20,360 --> 01:20:23,559 I mean, what the hell were yöu doing? 1798 01:20:23,560 --> 01:20:24,879 I was running. 1799 01:20:24,880 --> 01:20:25,999 Why? 1800 01:20:26,000 --> 01:20:27,440 Because I... 1801 01:20:28,400 --> 01:20:29,639 I'm sorry. 1802 01:20:29,640 --> 01:20:32,281 I'm really, really sorry. I was running to tell yöu that I'm sorry. 1803 01:20:34,840 --> 01:20:37,520 And I should have told these guys that we were dating. 1804 01:20:39,000 --> 01:20:40,199 From the beginning, I told him that. 1805 01:20:40,200 --> 01:20:41,925 We tried to convince him the whole time. 1806 01:20:42,320 --> 01:20:44,807 I want to date yöu, Chels. 1807 01:20:46,080 --> 01:20:48,760 Like... Like, really date yöu. 1808 01:20:50,280 --> 01:20:52,084 I want that, too. 1809 01:20:52,920 --> 01:20:54,281 Oh! 1810 01:20:57,520 --> 01:20:59,324 yöu're such an idiot. 1811 01:21:08,520 --> 01:21:10,245 I'm out. 1812 01:21:17,800 --> 01:21:19,759 GLASSES GIRL: I was wondering if yöu'd call. 1813 01:21:19,760 --> 01:21:20,799 So? 1814 01:21:20,800 --> 01:21:22,559 I'd love to see yöu. 1815 01:21:22,560 --> 01:21:24,599 No, seriously, that took forever. 1816 01:21:24,600 --> 01:21:25,961 (LAUGHS) 1817 01:21:26,720 --> 01:21:28,809 I'd love to see yöu again. 1818 01:21:29,800 --> 01:21:31,119 Ah! That's what I'm talking about. 1819 01:21:31,120 --> 01:21:33,359 Honestly? Who waits that long? 1820 01:21:33,360 --> 01:21:35,164 Yeah, that was my fault. 1821 01:21:35,960 --> 01:21:37,491 (BOTH LAUGHING) 1822 01:21:47,840 --> 01:21:49,201 (SIGHS) 1823 01:22:01,640 --> 01:22:04,999 Ooh, fucking guy in the red hat. 1824 01:22:05,000 --> 01:22:06,850 Who the fuck are yöu? 1825 01:22:09,800 --> 01:22:12,048 Let's find more pictures of yöu. 1826 01:22:18,600 --> 01:22:19,847 Bingo. 1827 01:22:22,240 --> 01:22:24,408 Let's fucking look yöu up. 1828 01:22:26,240 --> 01:22:27,646 Bill. 1829 01:22:29,000 --> 01:22:31,999 What? William Matherson, restaurateur. 1830 01:22:32,000 --> 01:22:34,202 What a piece of shit this guy is. 1831 01:22:38,040 --> 01:22:40,288 Oh, my God. Dude. 1832 01:22:59,840 --> 01:23:01,639 I mean, honestly, I just find it disgusting. 1833 01:23:01,640 --> 01:23:03,519 The way that yöu guys embrace the single life. 1834 01:23:03,520 --> 01:23:05,079 The women? The carousing? 1835 01:23:05,080 --> 01:23:07,079 Carousing? Who are yöu? Cary Grant? 1836 01:23:07,080 --> 01:23:08,439 yöu've been in a relationship all of two minutes. 1837 01:23:08,440 --> 01:23:10,479 And he is already a righteous asshole. 1838 01:23:10,480 --> 01:23:12,119 Guys, look, I'm just in love and shit. 1839 01:23:12,120 --> 01:23:14,559 And I've had a lot of time to sit and realize 1840 01:23:14,560 --> 01:23:16,919 how disgusting both of yöu are. 1841 01:23:16,920 --> 01:23:18,679 - Mostly yöu, Jason. - MIKEY: What about me? 1842 01:23:18,680 --> 01:23:20,439 yöu're the worst. yöu're pretty disgusting, too. 1843 01:23:20,440 --> 01:23:22,119 - yöu're gross. - I'm a killer. 1844 01:23:22,120 --> 01:23:24,368 What the... Did yöu... 1845 01:23:25,240 --> 01:23:26,679 Did yöu post a funny video on Ellie's wall? 1846 01:23:26,680 --> 01:23:28,039 No. 1847 01:23:28,040 --> 01:23:31,639 Yes, yöu did, because I'm looking at it right now, Jason! 1848 01:23:31,640 --> 01:23:33,839 What is it, funny cute? Or is it just funny? 1849 01:23:33,840 --> 01:23:37,079 It is funny cute! Jason, yöu pussy! 1850 01:23:37,080 --> 01:23:38,839 yöu funny cute videoed her? 1851 01:23:38,840 --> 01:23:40,959 I... Yes. I guess. I don't freaking know... 1852 01:23:40,960 --> 01:23:43,079 I don't know what I'm doing, man. 1853 01:23:43,080 --> 01:23:45,119 Hey, man. I think he loves her. 1854 01:23:45,120 --> 01:23:46,279 I think that's love! 1855 01:23:46,280 --> 01:23:47,399 It sounds like love to me. 1856 01:23:47,400 --> 01:23:48,519 I don't know, man. I don't know. Maybe I do. 1857 01:23:48,520 --> 01:23:50,081 MIKEY: What do yöu mean, yöu don't know? 1858 01:23:53,440 --> 01:23:54,959 - Well, then yöu have to tell her. - DANIEL: yöu have to. 1859 01:23:54,960 --> 01:23:56,479 - It'll be funny cute. - Maybe I should tell her. 1860 01:23:56,480 --> 01:23:58,959 Which is right up yöur alley. yöu love that shit. 1861 01:23:58,960 --> 01:24:01,003 Ha, ha, ha. Asshole. 1862 01:24:01,280 --> 01:24:03,079 I don't even know where to... 1863 01:24:03,080 --> 01:24:05,439 What's she doing? Let's stop by her place. Where's she at right now? 1864 01:24:05,440 --> 01:24:07,881 Third Tuesday of the month. She's at one of her readings. 1865 01:24:08,400 --> 01:24:10,839 Whoa. That... That was some stalker shit. 1866 01:24:10,840 --> 01:24:12,119 That's creepy. 1867 01:24:12,120 --> 01:24:13,479 It's creepy that yöu know that. 1868 01:24:13,480 --> 01:24:14,799 MIKEY: I mean, does anybody go? 1869 01:24:14,800 --> 01:24:16,119 No! Nobody ever goes. 1870 01:24:16,120 --> 01:24:17,479 - DANIEL: Nobody ever shows up? - Nobody. 1871 01:24:17,480 --> 01:24:20,001 Well, then, yöu are going to be the guy 1872 01:24:21,320 --> 01:24:23,409 who shows up. 1873 01:24:24,120 --> 01:24:27,927 AUTHOR: "We pounded along, my father's hand on top of the wheel." 1874 01:24:28,600 --> 01:24:30,040 Nobody ever shows up. 1875 01:24:30,120 --> 01:24:31,279 Yeah. 1876 01:24:31,280 --> 01:24:34,404 "I watched the bats crackle and plunge against the sky." 1877 01:24:34,440 --> 01:24:36,130 "They never knew here." 1878 01:24:36,360 --> 01:24:39,325 "They only knew the echo of there." 1879 01:24:39,720 --> 01:24:40,921 Thank yöu. 1880 01:24:49,000 --> 01:24:50,679 Thank yöu, Ray Floreson. 1881 01:24:50,680 --> 01:24:51,759 I have to do something. 1882 01:24:51,760 --> 01:24:53,280 ELLIE: Does anybody have any questions? 1883 01:24:56,160 --> 01:24:58,044 - What should I do? - Something. 1884 01:25:00,080 --> 01:25:02,726 Yeah. I have something that I would like to read. 1885 01:25:04,880 --> 01:25:06,320 From my novel. 1886 01:25:06,440 --> 01:25:07,719 It's not really the kind of place 1887 01:25:07,720 --> 01:25:09,039 where yöu can share from yöur own work. 1888 01:25:09,040 --> 01:25:11,402 Thank yöu very much. Honor to be here. 1889 01:25:11,600 --> 01:25:13,040 - This is good. - Um... 1890 01:25:15,760 --> 01:25:17,086 Tough act to follow. 1891 01:25:17,560 --> 01:25:19,250 Then don't. 1892 01:25:20,280 --> 01:25:21,599 I'm a big fan of yöur work. 1893 01:25:21,600 --> 01:25:23,404 I'm so sorry. I... 1894 01:25:23,720 --> 01:25:25,160 No. Please. 1895 01:25:27,720 --> 01:25:29,126 (SIGHS) 1896 01:25:40,040 --> 01:25:42,799 And then the other guy asked to buy her a drink, 1897 01:25:42,800 --> 01:25:44,525 right as Jason walked up. 1898 01:25:44,840 --> 01:25:46,280 And so she asked that guy, 1899 01:25:47,400 --> 01:25:49,523 "What happens if I enjoy the drink?" 1900 01:25:50,040 --> 01:25:51,446 "What happens then?" 1901 01:25:52,880 --> 01:25:56,004 And he pretended not to know the answer. So she told him. 1902 01:25:56,760 --> 01:25:58,959 She asked if they would play beer pong 1903 01:25:58,960 --> 01:26:00,519 in that shitty bar with his friends 1904 01:26:00,520 --> 01:26:03,405 until they headed back to his place in Murray Hill. 1905 01:26:03,920 --> 01:26:06,559 She asked if they'd have to listen to his roommate 1906 01:26:06,560 --> 01:26:09,969 fuck Hilary or Emily, or whatever her name was 1907 01:26:10,080 --> 01:26:11,645 till they fell asleep. 1908 01:26:12,600 --> 01:26:14,639 And she asked him if a year later, 1909 01:26:14,640 --> 01:26:16,763 they'd still be there in that bar. 1910 01:26:17,920 --> 01:26:21,806 The only difference being that now he feels pressure to get married 1911 01:26:22,120 --> 01:26:25,688 and have kids, because he thinks that that's what she wants. 1912 01:26:27,280 --> 01:26:29,005 And then in the summers, 1913 01:26:29,280 --> 01:26:31,323 they would drive up to the shitty Hamptons. 1914 01:26:32,800 --> 01:26:35,287 To meet his shitty parents. 1915 01:26:35,360 --> 01:26:38,325 Wondering the entire ride if they'd think that she was pretty enough. 1916 01:26:39,280 --> 01:26:40,561 Smart. 1917 01:26:40,640 --> 01:26:43,366 Wondering the entire ride if they think she's smart enough. 1918 01:26:44,160 --> 01:26:45,519 Because no one was. 1919 01:26:45,520 --> 01:26:47,563 And no one ever will be. 1920 01:26:53,680 --> 01:26:55,564 And Jason knew that now. 1921 01:26:57,280 --> 01:27:01,690 And he would give anything to go back to that moment. 1922 01:27:03,560 --> 01:27:07,606 The moment where they first met. Before anything went wrong. 1923 01:27:08,720 --> 01:27:14,086 Before he didn't show up for her when she needed him most. 1924 01:27:15,000 --> 01:27:17,239 Before he understood that being there for somebody 1925 01:27:17,240 --> 01:27:20,808 when it's most difficult is really all that relationships are. 1926 01:27:22,320 --> 01:27:24,045 Jason knew that now. 1927 01:27:25,880 --> 01:27:30,210 And he was so sorry for what he had done. 1928 01:27:35,240 --> 01:27:37,761 But Jason also realized that in that moment, 1929 01:27:38,240 --> 01:27:41,603 he wasn't afraid, because he 1930 01:27:43,640 --> 01:27:45,683 thought she wasn't the one. 1931 01:27:47,840 --> 01:27:51,522 He was absolutely terrified, because he knew she was. 1932 01:27:55,560 --> 01:27:59,082 And if she could give him just one more chance, 1933 01:28:01,720 --> 01:28:03,763 just one more chance, 1934 01:28:06,320 --> 01:28:08,124 she knew where to find him. 1935 01:28:42,840 --> 01:28:46,203 JASON: It's 2:18 in the morning in the middle of February. 1936 01:28:46,840 --> 01:28:50,044 I've been sitting on a park bench for almost four hours. 1937 01:28:52,160 --> 01:28:54,601 I'm fucking freezing. 1938 01:28:55,920 --> 01:28:57,884 Why am I sitting here? 1939 01:28:58,840 --> 01:29:01,407 Why am I still sitting on this bench? 1940 01:29:01,417 --> 01:29:04,427 "Hope You've Liked & Enjoyed The Movie" 1941 01:29:04,437 --> 01:29:07,910 Copyright from ecOtOne™ 1942 01:29:07,920 --> 01:29:10,487 (UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING) 1943 01:29:10,497 --> 01:29:37,150 Copyright from ecOtOne™ 1944 01:29:37,160 --> 01:29:39,169 So? 1945 01:29:39,640 --> 01:29:41,888 (UPBEAT MUSIC CONTINUES PLAYING) 1946 01:29:41,898 --> 01:29:49,630 Copyright from ecOtOne™ 1947 01:29:49,640 --> 01:29:51,171 (MEN LAUGHING) 1948 01:29:51,800 --> 01:29:53,919 I didn't know yöu could change colors! 1949 01:29:53,920 --> 01:29:54,999 - Just stop. - (COUGHS) 1950 01:29:55,000 --> 01:29:57,248 yöur dick looks like a sad giraffe. 1951 01:29:57,280 --> 01:29:59,279 - yöur dick looks like a shaved hamster. - Stop. 1952 01:29:59,280 --> 01:30:00,481 Can yöu guys stop? 1953 01:30:00,600 --> 01:30:04,327 yöur dick looks like my dick 1954 01:30:04,480 --> 01:30:08,207 if it were bigger and blacker. 1955 01:30:09,480 --> 01:30:10,841 (ALL LAUGHING) 1956 01:30:11,280 --> 01:30:12,481 DIRECTOR: Cut! 1957 01:30:13,200 --> 01:30:16,722 Did yöu friend that girl yet, Mikey? 1958 01:30:17,320 --> 01:30:18,646 (PLATE SHATTERING) 1959 01:30:19,920 --> 01:30:21,246 (DANIEL SINGING HAVA NAGILA) 1960 01:30:21,360 --> 01:30:22,759 Yeah. I told that assistant at Vogue 1961 01:30:22,760 --> 01:30:25,725 I couldn't hang out with her cause I was taking a shit. 1962 01:30:26,160 --> 01:30:28,999 Whoa. Look at that fucking crazy bruise on my arm. 1963 01:30:29,000 --> 01:30:30,690 yöu see that bruise? 1964 01:30:32,160 --> 01:30:33,879 It's from fucking acting, bro. 1965 01:30:33,880 --> 01:30:34,999 Yeah. 1966 01:30:35,000 --> 01:30:36,281 Fuck yöu up. 1967 01:30:36,320 --> 01:30:39,490 Wait, I'm fucking this up. Can we just do this one more time? 1968 01:30:39,840 --> 01:30:40,999 DIRECTOR: Let it go. 1969 01:30:41,000 --> 01:30:43,359 DANIEL: It's cause yöu're holding yöur imaginary dick the whole time. 1970 01:30:43,360 --> 01:30:45,159 That might be it. Can I just whip it out? 1971 01:30:45,160 --> 01:30:47,559 Mike, we all know yöu're a two hander. So just, yöu know... 1972 01:30:47,560 --> 01:30:49,967 Oh, shit. He knows me. 1973 01:30:50,280 --> 01:30:53,359 That's not a nipple. That's not my... That's a fake. 1974 01:30:53,360 --> 01:30:55,005 That's a sticker. I don't have nipples like that. 1975 01:30:55,120 --> 01:30:58,079 So maybe I'm the best ever receiving blowjob... Ever. 1976 01:30:58,080 --> 01:31:00,931 At receiving. Fucking mother sucker. 1977 01:31:00,960 --> 01:31:04,119 So maybe I'm the best ever at receiving blow... 1978 01:31:04,120 --> 01:31:05,559 DIRECTOR: There are no "evers" in the whole thing. 1979 01:31:05,560 --> 01:31:06,639 What? 1980 01:31:06,640 --> 01:31:08,399 Can we just write it on her fucking head? 1981 01:31:08,400 --> 01:31:10,039 Maybe I'm the best ever. 1982 01:31:10,040 --> 01:31:11,159 No. No "ever." 1983 01:31:11,160 --> 01:31:14,479 Probably gave me the best blowjob ever, 1984 01:31:14,480 --> 01:31:17,719 in the recorded history of blowjobs. 1985 01:31:17,720 --> 01:31:19,251 (LAUGHING) 1986 01:31:19,640 --> 01:31:22,844 DIRECTOR: "And she gave me perhaps the best blowjob in recorded history." 1987 01:31:22,920 --> 01:31:24,639 There's no "ever." 1988 01:31:24,640 --> 01:31:26,251 (CREW LAUGHING) 1989 01:31:27,080 --> 01:31:28,399 What are yöu doing? 1990 01:31:28,400 --> 01:31:29,999 I ain't doing nothing. 1991 01:31:30,000 --> 01:31:31,079 Yes, yöu are. 1992 01:31:31,080 --> 01:31:34,359 I promise. I'm acting satisfied. Okay? Jeez. 1993 01:31:34,360 --> 01:31:35,721 Oh, God. 1994 01:31:36,000 --> 01:31:37,079 "Doing the thing"? 1995 01:31:37,080 --> 01:31:38,399 Yeah, I miss that. And I'm not gonna 1996 01:31:38,400 --> 01:31:39,759 be able to do that if I'm with Chelsea. 1997 01:31:39,760 --> 01:31:42,804 I'm gonna miss, like, sharing a mouth with yöu. 1998 01:31:45,160 --> 01:31:46,930 I miss that so much, man. 1999 01:31:49,440 --> 01:31:51,319 Oh, there's the paparazzi! 2000 01:31:51,320 --> 01:31:52,567 No way! 2001 01:31:53,840 --> 01:31:56,884 Oh, my God! They're not even pointed at Miles! 2002 01:31:56,920 --> 01:31:58,119 Asshole! 2003 01:31:58,120 --> 01:31:59,890 Nobody cares about me, bro! 2004 01:32:00,040 --> 01:32:01,287 Aw! 2005 01:32:01,640 --> 01:32:04,161 I might be really fucked up. 2006 01:32:04,640 --> 01:32:08,890 But I think Omar from The Wire is sitting on our couch. 2007 01:32:13,240 --> 01:32:15,359 DIRECTOR: It's him! It's him! (ELLIE SCREAMS) 2008 01:32:15,360 --> 01:32:17,164 (ALL CHEERING) 2009 01:32:20,880 --> 01:32:22,081 Yes! 2010 01:32:22,091 --> 01:34:31,881 Copyright from ecOtOne™