1
00:00:51,166 --> 00:00:53,333
I'm thinking of ending things.
2
00:00:53,875 --> 00:00:56,166
Once this thought arrives, it stays.
3
00:00:56,250 --> 00:00:59,166
It sticks, it lingers, it dominates.
4
00:00:59,875 --> 00:01:02,125
There's not much I can do about it,
trust me.
5
00:01:02,208 --> 00:01:03,250
It doesn't go away.
6
00:01:03,875 --> 00:01:05,708
It's there whether I like it or not.
7
00:01:05,791 --> 00:01:09,791
It's there when I eat, when I go to bed.
It's there when I sleep, when I wake up.
8
00:01:09,875 --> 00:01:11,500
It's always there. Always.
9
00:01:13,208 --> 00:01:15,375
I haven't been thinking about it for long.
10
00:01:15,458 --> 00:01:16,500
The idea is new.
11
00:01:17,333 --> 00:01:19,083
But it feels old at the same time.
12
00:01:19,958 --> 00:01:21,083
When did it start?
13
00:01:21,541 --> 00:01:23,291
What if this thought
wasn't conceived by me,
14
00:01:23,375 --> 00:01:25,416
but planted in my mind, pre-developed.
15
00:01:26,416 --> 00:01:28,708
Is an unspoken idea unoriginal?
16
00:01:29,458 --> 00:01:31,458
Maybe I've actually known all along.
17
00:01:32,000 --> 00:01:34,333
Maybe this is how
it was always going to end.
18
00:01:36,583 --> 00:01:37,750
Jake once said,
19
00:01:38,791 --> 00:01:41,166
"Sometimes the thought
is closer to the truth,
20
00:01:41,625 --> 00:01:43,500
to reality, than an action.
21
00:01:44,125 --> 00:01:47,750
You can say anything, you can do anything,
but you can't fake a thought."
22
00:01:48,750 --> 00:01:50,375
The road is mostly empty.
23
00:01:51,666 --> 00:01:54,375
It's quiet around here. Vacant.
24
00:01:54,458 --> 00:01:55,958
More so than anticipated.
25
00:01:56,375 --> 00:01:58,208
So much to see, but not many people.
26
00:01:58,291 --> 00:02:00,000
Not many buildings or houses.
27
00:02:00,416 --> 00:02:01,458
Sky.
28
00:02:01,541 --> 00:02:03,500
Trees, fields, fences.
29
00:02:04,041 --> 00:02:06,500
The road and its gravel shoulders.
30
00:02:07,958 --> 00:02:10,791
"You wanna stop for a coffee?"
"I think I'm OK I say.
31
00:02:11,625 --> 00:02:14,458
"Last chance we'll have
before it becomes really farm-y."
32
00:02:15,750 --> 00:02:18,250
I'm visiting Jake's parents
for the first time.
33
00:02:18,333 --> 00:02:20,291
Or I will be when we arrive.
34
00:02:20,375 --> 00:02:22,250
Jake, my boyfriend.
35
00:02:22,333 --> 00:02:24,500
He hasn't been my boyfriend for very long.
36
00:02:24,583 --> 00:02:25,791
It's our first trip together.
37
00:02:25,875 --> 00:02:27,875
Our first long drive.
38
00:02:27,958 --> 00:02:30,208
So it's weird that I'm feeling nostalgic,
39
00:02:30,291 --> 00:02:32,666
about our relationship,
about him, about us.
40
00:02:34,416 --> 00:02:37,583
I should be excited,
looking forward to the first of many.
41
00:02:37,666 --> 00:02:39,750
But I'm not. Not at all.
42
00:02:41,416 --> 00:02:44,458
I've seen more barns on this drive
than I've seen in years.
43
00:02:44,541 --> 00:02:45,666
Maybe in my life.
44
00:02:46,125 --> 00:02:47,625
They all look the same.
45
00:02:47,708 --> 00:02:50,166
Some cows, some horses, sheep, fields.
46
00:02:50,916 --> 00:02:51,875
And barns.
47
00:02:52,541 --> 00:02:53,750
Such a big sky.
48
00:02:56,958 --> 00:02:59,333
Feels like I've known Jake
longer than I have.
49
00:03:00,250 --> 00:03:01,291
What has it been?
50
00:03:02,041 --> 00:03:03,416
Oh, a month?
51
00:03:03,875 --> 00:03:05,250
Six weeks, maybe seven.
52
00:03:05,333 --> 00:03:08,250
I should know exactly.
I'll say seven weeks.
53
00:03:12,625 --> 00:03:16,083
The assumptions are right.
I can feel my fear growing. Now is the...
54
00:03:16,166 --> 00:03:20,208
We have a real connection.
A rare and intense attachment.
55
00:03:21,166 --> 00:03:23,250
I've never experienced anything like it.
56
00:03:25,125 --> 00:03:28,500
…growing. Now is the time
for the answer. Just one question.
57
00:03:28,916 --> 00:03:30,416
One question to answer.
58
00:03:36,291 --> 00:03:37,250
It's snowing!
59
00:03:37,333 --> 00:03:38,791
Winter is comin' in!
60
00:03:39,750 --> 00:03:40,666
Yep.
61
00:03:44,708 --> 00:03:48,250
Look at the sky.
62
00:04:19,000 --> 00:04:20,666
I'm thinking of ending things.
63
00:04:20,750 --> 00:04:22,166
- Huh?
- What?
64
00:04:22,250 --> 00:04:23,375
Did you say something?
65
00:04:23,708 --> 00:04:25,625
No, I don't think so.
66
00:04:26,708 --> 00:04:27,625
Weird.
67
00:04:27,708 --> 00:04:29,375
Yeah.
68
00:04:29,958 --> 00:04:31,916
I'm thinking of ending things.
69
00:04:32,916 --> 00:04:35,250
What's the point in carrying on like this?
70
00:04:35,333 --> 00:04:37,291
I know what it is, where it's going.
71
00:04:37,791 --> 00:04:39,875
Jake is a nice guy, but...
72
00:04:40,666 --> 00:04:43,500
it's not going anywhere.
I've known this for a while now.
73
00:04:44,375 --> 00:04:47,833
Maybe it's human nature to keep going
in the face of this knowledge.
74
00:04:48,375 --> 00:04:50,666
The alternative requires too much energy.
75
00:04:50,750 --> 00:04:51,958
Decisiveness.
76
00:04:52,666 --> 00:04:53,500
Hmm.
77
00:04:53,583 --> 00:04:56,500
People stay in unhealthy relationships
because it's easier.
78
00:04:56,916 --> 00:04:58,125
Basic physics.
79
00:04:58,583 --> 00:05:00,791
An object in motion
tends to stay in motion.
80
00:05:00,875 --> 00:05:04,166
People tend to stay in relationships
past their expiration date.
81
00:05:04,583 --> 00:05:06,541
It's Newton's first law of emotion.
82
00:05:06,625 --> 00:05:09,583
Do you want to stop for a coffee
83
00:05:09,666 --> 00:05:11,666
or something, a... a snack?
84
00:05:11,750 --> 00:05:13,708
It's... it's going to get pretty farm-y
85
00:05:13,791 --> 00:05:16,000
- pretty fast now.
- No, no, no, I'm... I'm fine.
86
00:05:16,083 --> 00:05:17,541
- You sure?
- Mm-hmm.
87
00:05:17,625 --> 00:05:20,083
Don't want to spoil my appetite.
88
00:05:22,500 --> 00:05:23,375
OK
89
00:05:44,375 --> 00:05:47,833
You know, my mother hasn't been
feeling well recently.
90
00:05:47,916 --> 00:05:49,041
- Oh.
- So...
91
00:05:49,125 --> 00:05:49,958
I'm sorry.
92
00:05:50,041 --> 00:05:53,333
I'm just saying
that there might not be much of a spread,
93
00:05:53,416 --> 00:05:56,041
that she might not be up to
a lot of cooking.
94
00:05:56,125 --> 00:05:56,958
Um...
95
00:05:59,000 --> 00:06:01,458
- She hasn't been well.
- What's going on with her?
96
00:06:01,541 --> 00:06:04,916
Just saying, if you want
to stop for a snack
97
00:06:05,000 --> 00:06:09,250
or anything like that,
it would probably be fine...
98
00:06:09,708 --> 00:06:10,625
um...
99
00:06:12,041 --> 00:06:13,541
in terms of appetite spoiling.
100
00:06:13,625 --> 00:06:16,583
It might even be advisable.
101
00:06:16,666 --> 00:06:17,500
I'm fine.
102
00:06:17,583 --> 00:06:18,416
OK
103
00:06:26,375 --> 00:06:28,708
Come, join me, my friends,
104
00:06:28,791 --> 00:06:31,208
and accept Jesus into your hearts,
105
00:06:31,291 --> 00:06:33,958
for as Isaiah 1:18 tells us,
106
00:06:34,041 --> 00:06:36,166
though your sins be as scarlet,
107
00:06:36,250 --> 00:06:38,708
they shall be as white as snow.
108
00:06:39,250 --> 00:06:41,916
They really are looking forward
to meeting you.
109
00:06:42,708 --> 00:06:45,583
I don't want to give you
the wrong impression.
110
00:06:45,666 --> 00:06:48,333
- Aww, that's nice to hear.
- ...a lot about you.
111
00:06:48,625 --> 00:06:49,791
Yeah, I-I-I'm... I'm...
112
00:06:49,875 --> 00:06:52,208
I'm really looking forward
to meeting them too.
113
00:06:54,416 --> 00:06:57,541
Maybe it's unfair of me
to be going on this trip with Jake…
114
00:06:57,958 --> 00:07:01,125
When I'm so uncertain about our future,
our lack of it.
115
00:07:02,375 --> 00:07:04,416
After all, going to meet
your boyfriend's parents
116
00:07:04,500 --> 00:07:06,625
is the proverbial next step, isn't it?
117
00:07:06,708 --> 00:07:09,625
The truth is, I haven't even
told my parents I'm dating Jake.
118
00:07:09,708 --> 00:07:12,458
I've never mentioned him,
and I don't think I ever will.
119
00:07:12,791 --> 00:07:14,458
She hasn't been feeling well.
120
00:07:14,541 --> 00:07:17,791
Getting old ain't for sissies,
as Bette Davis said.
121
00:07:17,875 --> 00:07:19,208
True, although...
122
00:07:19,291 --> 00:07:23,625
one might just take issue
with her use of the word sissy...
123
00:07:23,708 --> 00:07:26,500
- Yeah, of course. Yeah. Yes, sir.
- ...as a pejorative.
124
00:07:27,333 --> 00:07:28,583
It was a different time.
125
00:07:29,875 --> 00:07:31,875
I guess it's curiosity.
126
00:07:33,416 --> 00:07:35,125
Jake is certainly hard to figure.
127
00:07:36,375 --> 00:07:38,500
Maybe it's like a window into his origins.
128
00:07:39,208 --> 00:07:41,333
The child being father of the man and all.
129
00:07:41,416 --> 00:07:43,250
Are you a fan of Wordsworth, then?
130
00:07:43,791 --> 00:07:46,083
- Wordsworth?
- William Wordsworth, the poet?
131
00:07:47,125 --> 00:07:48,333
Um...
132
00:07:48,875 --> 00:07:51,250
Not... I'm not familiar, really.
133
00:07:51,333 --> 00:07:52,333
Why do you ask?
134
00:07:52,416 --> 00:07:55,541
Just thinking about him for some reason.
135
00:07:55,625 --> 00:07:57,500
He popped into my head.
136
00:07:58,833 --> 00:08:04,375
His poem Ode: Intimations of Immortality
from Recollections of Early Childhood.
137
00:08:04,458 --> 00:08:06,166
Jesus, that's the title?
138
00:08:06,250 --> 00:08:08,708
- Sounds like an entire poem.
- Well…
139
00:08:15,166 --> 00:08:17,916
- I'm thinking of...
- Get your words' worth with Wordsworth.
140
00:08:18,333 --> 00:08:19,750
Fired.
141
00:08:22,166 --> 00:08:24,166
Do you want to hear how it starts?
142
00:08:24,250 --> 00:08:26,708
- It's just that the...
- I'm not a metaphorical-type gal.
143
00:08:26,791 --> 00:08:28,666
It's just that that one speaks to me.
144
00:08:30,500 --> 00:08:34,875
Uh, incidentally, Wordsworth wrote
a series of poems to a woman named Lucy.
145
00:08:37,291 --> 00:08:38,333
Like me!
146
00:08:38,416 --> 00:08:41,791
A beautiful, idealized woman
147
00:08:42,250 --> 00:08:44,041
who dies young.
148
00:08:44,125 --> 00:08:45,208
Oh, yikes.
149
00:08:46,166 --> 00:08:49,000
Well, the comparison goes
only as far as your name.
150
00:08:49,083 --> 00:08:49,916
Phew.
151
00:08:50,958 --> 00:08:53,708
And that you are ideal,
152
00:08:53,791 --> 00:08:56,208
- of course.
- Yeah, yeah.
153
00:08:56,291 --> 00:08:59,291
Ah, that's very sweet.
154
00:09:04,375 --> 00:09:05,458
It's just…
155
00:09:11,208 --> 00:09:12,083
Who's that?
156
00:09:12,166 --> 00:09:13,708
Uh, it's just a friend.
157
00:09:14,375 --> 00:09:15,541
I'm not gonna answer.
158
00:09:15,625 --> 00:09:17,916
- You can, I don't mind. You should.
- Eh, it's OK
159
00:09:18,000 --> 00:09:19,416
- It's all right.
- I don't mind.
160
00:09:28,208 --> 00:09:29,833
That's odd. Did you see that swing set
161
00:09:29,916 --> 00:09:31,208
- we just passed?
- What swing set?
162
00:09:31,291 --> 00:09:33,208
It was weird.
It was this beautiful new swing set
163
00:09:33,291 --> 00:09:34,916
in front of an abandoned house.
164
00:09:35,000 --> 00:09:37,166
- No. I missed it.
- What?
165
00:09:37,250 --> 00:09:38,375
I didn't see it.
166
00:09:38,458 --> 00:09:39,791
Why would that be there?
167
00:09:39,875 --> 00:09:41,958
I mean, clearly no one's lived
in that house for years.
168
00:09:42,041 --> 00:09:44,875
Someone's moving in, and...
169
00:09:45,416 --> 00:09:48,750
they brought the swing set first?
That's all I can think of.
170
00:09:50,875 --> 00:09:52,000
- I...
- That seems
171
00:09:52,083 --> 00:09:53,875
like an unlikely sequence of events.
172
00:09:56,208 --> 00:09:59,041
You know, like,
to have something
173
00:09:59,125 --> 00:10:02,625
to entertain the kids while the parents
are getting the house ready.
174
00:10:04,958 --> 00:10:05,791
Odd.
175
00:10:06,416 --> 00:10:07,416
They're saying, uh,
176
00:10:08,166 --> 00:10:10,083
- there might be a fair amount of snow.
- Yeah?
177
00:10:10,166 --> 00:10:11,666
They're predicting it.
178
00:10:12,250 --> 00:10:14,208
Do you think we should maybe turn back?
179
00:10:15,875 --> 00:10:17,291
I've got a fair amount of...
180
00:10:18,000 --> 00:10:20,916
well, a lot, actually,
of work to do tomorrow.
181
00:10:21,416 --> 00:10:22,916
I need to get home tonight so that I...
182
00:10:23,000 --> 00:10:26,083
I think we'll be OK.
I've got tire chains in the trunk.
183
00:10:30,000 --> 00:10:33,041
- What are you working on?
- Oh, I have a paper due Wednesday.
184
00:10:33,125 --> 00:10:34,041
Which one is this?
185
00:10:34,125 --> 00:10:36,333
Susceptibility to rabies infection
186
00:10:36,416 --> 00:10:38,625
in the sensory dorsal
root ganglia neurons.
187
00:10:38,708 --> 00:10:40,791
The trigeminal ganglia as well, right?
188
00:10:41,333 --> 00:10:43,125
Yes, exactly.
189
00:10:45,291 --> 00:10:46,208
Point for me.
190
00:10:47,875 --> 00:10:51,666
Interested in and knowledgeable
about my girlfriend's work.
191
00:10:51,750 --> 00:10:53,000
Point for Jake.
192
00:10:55,166 --> 00:10:56,416
- How's the paper going?
- Oh...
193
00:10:56,500 --> 00:10:59,125
It's nowhere actually.
194
00:10:59,541 --> 00:11:02,708
I really do need to get back tonight,
deal with it first thing.
195
00:11:02,791 --> 00:11:03,750
I'll get you home!
196
00:11:04,708 --> 00:11:05,541
Chains.
197
00:11:05,625 --> 00:11:06,708
Chains.
198
00:11:07,875 --> 00:11:09,625
Yeah, I do like Jake.
199
00:11:10,166 --> 00:11:11,250
And he's educated.
200
00:11:11,666 --> 00:11:15,041
Our fields are different,
but he's curious and keeps up.
201
00:11:15,125 --> 00:11:17,500
That's a good thing.
It's in the pro column.
202
00:11:17,583 --> 00:11:20,083
And he's cute in his awkward way.
203
00:11:20,875 --> 00:11:22,541
We're interesting together too.
204
00:11:22,958 --> 00:11:25,208
People look at us when we're together.
205
00:11:25,291 --> 00:11:27,833
"Who's that couple?"
I don't get looked at alone.
206
00:11:28,291 --> 00:11:31,708
And Jake doesn't either.
Jake tells me that he feels it.
207
00:11:32,416 --> 00:11:33,750
Feels invisible.
208
00:11:40,208 --> 00:11:42,083
You want to listen to something?
209
00:11:45,500 --> 00:11:46,833
Sorry, uh, what?
210
00:11:49,791 --> 00:11:50,666
Um...
211
00:11:51,041 --> 00:11:56,833
I asked if you want to listen
to some music?
212
00:11:56,916 --> 00:11:58,291
Oh, yeah, sure.
213
00:12:03,958 --> 00:12:06,666
When you get out this far,
there's not much signal.
214
00:12:13,791 --> 00:12:15,333
It's an odd song.
215
00:12:15,958 --> 00:12:17,208
To...
216
00:12:18,791 --> 00:12:22,083
- Out here in... in the middle of nothing.
- It's from Oklahoma!
217
00:12:22,166 --> 00:12:23,125
The musical.
218
00:12:23,500 --> 00:12:25,916
I didn't know you were a fan
of musical theater.
219
00:12:26,000 --> 00:12:27,583
Well, I'm not, really.
220
00:12:27,666 --> 00:12:30,333
Anyway, I just know a few musicals.Uh...
221
00:12:30,416 --> 00:12:34,291
Oklahoma, Phantom,
Carousel, South Pacific,
222
00:12:34,375 --> 00:12:36,416
Guys and Dolls, Flower Drum Song...
223
00:12:36,500 --> 00:12:37,458
Wicked...
224
00:12:37,541 --> 00:12:40,708
How to Succeed in Business
Without Really Trying, Music Man,
225
00:12:40,791 --> 00:12:42,541
Pajama Game, Cabaret,
226
00:12:43,375 --> 00:12:46,583
The Lion King, Grease,
The King and I, The Sound of Music,
227
00:12:46,666 --> 00:12:48,666
Pal Joey, Charley's Aunt, On The Town,
228
00:12:48,750 --> 00:12:50,000
My Fair Lady.
229
00:12:50,083 --> 00:12:52,416
But I know Oklahoma best, I guess.
230
00:12:52,500 --> 00:12:54,250
They do it every few years...
231
00:12:55,291 --> 00:12:57,000
For obvious reasons.
232
00:12:57,750 --> 00:12:59,458
Wait, who does it every few years?
233
00:12:59,541 --> 00:13:02,041
Sometimes I see kids
234
00:13:02,125 --> 00:13:05,458
who were in past productions, you know,
235
00:13:05,916 --> 00:13:09,416
um, at the supermarket,
working at stores in town.
236
00:13:11,250 --> 00:13:12,875
Older now.
237
00:13:40,583 --> 00:13:42,916
This girl seems healthy enough
in her attitude.
238
00:13:43,916 --> 00:13:44,750
Good for her.
239
00:13:44,833 --> 00:13:48,208
She... she's protesting too much,
it turns out.
240
00:13:48,291 --> 00:13:49,500
We've all been there.
241
00:13:51,833 --> 00:13:52,666
Where?
242
00:13:53,791 --> 00:13:56,166
Protesting too much
how OK everything is.
243
00:13:56,250 --> 00:13:58,291
That's why I like road trips.
244
00:13:58,375 --> 00:14:00,916
It's good to remind yourself
245
00:14:01,333 --> 00:14:05,375
the world's... larger
than the inside of your own head.
246
00:14:05,458 --> 00:14:06,875
- You know?
- Mm-hmm.
247
00:14:07,625 --> 00:14:09,000
Perspective.
248
00:14:09,083 --> 00:14:10,083
Perspective.
249
00:14:11,416 --> 00:14:13,291
It is beautiful out here.
250
00:14:13,875 --> 00:14:15,958
In a bleak, heartbroken kind of way.
251
00:14:18,666 --> 00:14:20,500
What was the last road trip I took?
252
00:14:22,708 --> 00:14:23,583
Hmm...
253
00:14:24,291 --> 00:14:25,875
I should remember, but I don't.
254
00:14:27,125 --> 00:14:28,750
Nothing's coming to mind.
255
00:14:28,833 --> 00:14:31,500
It's odd. I'm foggy
about so many things lately.
256
00:14:31,583 --> 00:14:33,458
Do you like this type of landscape?
257
00:14:33,541 --> 00:14:34,375
Mmm.
258
00:14:34,458 --> 00:14:35,666
Yeah, it's beautiful.
259
00:14:35,750 --> 00:14:36,791
It's melancholy.
260
00:14:37,208 --> 00:14:38,625
I do like that.
261
00:14:40,000 --> 00:14:41,333
It's the poet in you.
262
00:14:43,375 --> 00:14:44,291
Yeah.
263
00:14:44,833 --> 00:14:46,000
I suppose so.
264
00:14:47,541 --> 00:14:48,583
Maybe, I don't know.
265
00:14:53,125 --> 00:14:54,708
You been working on anything?
266
00:14:55,166 --> 00:14:56,875
Uh, I-I...
267
00:14:56,958 --> 00:14:58,416
I just finished something.
268
00:14:58,500 --> 00:15:00,500
Yeah. I don't... I don't know.
269
00:15:00,583 --> 00:15:02,625
- Can I hear it?
- You can read it.
270
00:15:02,708 --> 00:15:06,625
I like to hear them in your voice,
and you're so good at reciting them.
271
00:15:06,708 --> 00:15:08,166
Not really, but thanks.
272
00:15:08,250 --> 00:15:11,375
It'll go with the poetic scenery.
273
00:15:11,458 --> 00:15:13,208
I don't know, Jake,
I just don't...
274
00:15:13,291 --> 00:15:15,666
I don't really feel much like performing
275
00:15:15,750 --> 00:15:17,583
- right now.
- Come on, it'll pass the time.
276
00:15:19,291 --> 00:15:21,125
I don't want you to get bored.
277
00:15:23,416 --> 00:15:24,833
It's called "Bonedog."
278
00:15:30,458 --> 00:15:31,958
"Coming home is terrible...
279
00:15:33,250 --> 00:15:35,541
whether the dogs lick your face or not,
280
00:15:36,250 --> 00:15:37,250
whether you have...
281
00:15:38,666 --> 00:15:39,625
A wife,
282
00:15:39,708 --> 00:15:44,416
or just a wife-shaped loneliness
waiting for you.
283
00:15:44,916 --> 00:15:46,833
Coming home is terribly lonely...
284
00:15:47,875 --> 00:15:52,083
so that you think
of the oppressive barometric pressure
285
00:15:52,166 --> 00:15:54,791
back where you have just come from
with fondness,
286
00:15:54,875 --> 00:15:57,166
because everything's worse
once you're home.
287
00:15:57,625 --> 00:16:01,041
You think of the vermin
clinging to the grass stalks...
288
00:16:02,291 --> 00:16:04,083
long hours on the road,
289
00:16:04,166 --> 00:16:07,375
roadside assistance and ice creams,
290
00:16:07,458 --> 00:16:10,666
and the peculiar shapes of certain clouds
291
00:16:10,750 --> 00:16:11,916
and silences
292
00:16:12,500 --> 00:16:15,000
with longing,
because you did not want to return.
293
00:16:15,083 --> 00:16:16,208
Coming home is...
294
00:16:18,833 --> 00:16:20,083
just awful.
295
00:16:21,708 --> 00:16:24,916
And the home-style silences and clouds
296
00:16:25,000 --> 00:16:27,958
contribute to nothing
but the general malaise.
297
00:16:28,041 --> 00:16:31,416
Clouds, such as they are,
are in fact suspect
298
00:16:31,500 --> 00:16:34,875
and made from a different material
than those you left behind.
299
00:16:34,958 --> 00:16:39,125
You yourself were cut
from a different cloudy cloth,
300
00:16:40,375 --> 00:16:41,333
returned,
301
00:16:43,000 --> 00:16:44,083
remaindered,
302
00:16:45,333 --> 00:16:46,875
ill-met by moonlight,
303
00:16:46,958 --> 00:16:48,333
unhappy to be back,
304
00:16:48,416 --> 00:16:50,791
slack in all the wrong spots.
305
00:16:50,875 --> 00:16:52,541
Seamy suit of clothes,
306
00:16:52,625 --> 00:16:54,833
dishrag-ratty, worn.
307
00:16:57,750 --> 00:16:59,166
You return home,
308
00:17:00,333 --> 00:17:01,458
moon-landed,
309
00:17:02,833 --> 00:17:03,750
foreign.
310
00:17:05,791 --> 00:17:08,125
The Earth's gravitational pull,
311
00:17:08,208 --> 00:17:09,958
an effort now redoubled...
312
00:17:11,458 --> 00:17:13,875
Dragging your shoelaces loose...
313
00:17:14,875 --> 00:17:16,125
And your shoulders,
314
00:17:17,666 --> 00:17:20,958
etching deeper the stanza of worry
on your forehead.
315
00:17:22,125 --> 00:17:23,875
You return home deepened,
316
00:17:24,583 --> 00:17:27,083
a parched well linked to tomorrow
317
00:17:27,166 --> 00:17:29,625
by a frail strand of...
318
00:17:31,458 --> 00:17:32,333
anyway.
319
00:17:37,666 --> 00:17:40,958
You sigh into the onslaught
of identical days,
320
00:17:42,625 --> 00:17:45,041
one might as well, at a time.
321
00:17:47,958 --> 00:17:48,791
Well...
322
00:17:50,083 --> 00:17:50,958
anyway,
323
00:17:51,916 --> 00:17:52,875
you're back.
324
00:17:54,375 --> 00:17:58,166
The sun goes up and down
like a tired whore,
325
00:17:59,375 --> 00:18:05,250
the weather immobile like a broken limb
while you just keep getting older.
326
00:18:05,708 --> 00:18:10,416
Nothing moves, but the shifting tides
of salt in your body.
327
00:18:10,500 --> 00:18:12,083
Your vision blears,
328
00:18:12,166 --> 00:18:14,250
you carry your weather with you;
329
00:18:14,708 --> 00:18:16,208
the big, blue whale;
330
00:18:17,291 --> 00:18:19,166
a skeletal darkness.
331
00:18:22,875 --> 00:18:24,250
You come back
332
00:18:25,416 --> 00:18:26,791
with X-ray vision...
333
00:18:29,541 --> 00:18:31,500
your eyes have become a hunger.
334
00:18:32,666 --> 00:18:36,000
You come home with your mutant gifts
335
00:18:37,375 --> 00:18:38,791
to a house of bone.
336
00:18:42,083 --> 00:18:43,583
Everything you see now,
337
00:18:45,000 --> 00:18:46,000
all of it...
338
00:18:47,500 --> 00:18:48,375
bone."
339
00:18:52,708 --> 00:18:53,541
Wow.
340
00:18:54,208 --> 00:18:56,833
Well, wow is an all-purpose exclamation.
341
00:18:56,916 --> 00:18:58,583
I just realized that.
342
00:19:00,625 --> 00:19:01,833
It might be... It can...
343
00:19:03,458 --> 00:19:05,333
It can mean you... you loved it,
344
00:19:05,416 --> 00:19:08,208
or it can mean there are no words
to describe how...
345
00:19:08,291 --> 00:19:09,833
...how rubbish it is.
346
00:19:09,916 --> 00:19:11,083
I love it.
347
00:19:11,541 --> 00:19:13,500
I love it. It's amazing.
348
00:19:15,458 --> 00:19:16,791
It's... it's like...
349
00:19:17,708 --> 00:19:19,375
It's like you wrote it about me.
350
00:19:19,458 --> 00:19:20,666
Oh, you know, I-I-I...
351
00:19:20,750 --> 00:19:24,291
I guess that's what one hopes for
when writing a poem.
352
00:19:25,375 --> 00:19:26,541
What's that?
353
00:19:26,625 --> 00:19:29,791
Some universality in the specific,
I don't know.
354
00:19:29,875 --> 00:19:31,541
It's like you wrote it about me.
355
00:19:34,041 --> 00:19:36,250
I'm thinking of ending things.
356
00:19:36,333 --> 00:19:37,791
Jake is really great.
357
00:19:37,875 --> 00:19:39,083
He's really sweet.
358
00:19:39,166 --> 00:19:40,166
He's sensitive,
359
00:19:40,250 --> 00:19:42,125
and he listens to me, and he's smart.
360
00:19:42,208 --> 00:19:44,250
But there's just something...
361
00:19:44,333 --> 00:19:45,333
Ineffable.
362
00:19:45,666 --> 00:19:48,291
Profoundly, unutterably,
un-fixably wrong here.
363
00:19:48,375 --> 00:19:50,708
-Are you OK
-Yeah.
364
00:19:50,791 --> 00:19:52,625
You just seem sort of far away is all.
365
00:19:52,708 --> 00:19:54,500
I'm... just thinking.
366
00:19:54,916 --> 00:19:56,666
About what?
367
00:19:57,916 --> 00:19:59,333
Uh...
368
00:19:59,416 --> 00:20:01,625
I don't know, just...
369
00:20:02,125 --> 00:20:03,666
Vague in my head stuff.
370
00:20:03,750 --> 00:20:05,208
Vague in your head stuff.
371
00:20:06,500 --> 00:20:08,208
I guess I was thinking about time.
372
00:20:08,291 --> 00:20:09,666
- Really?
- Yeah.
373
00:20:11,666 --> 00:20:14,333
Like we're on a train
and it takes us where it takes us.
374
00:20:14,416 --> 00:20:16,500
There's no veering off,
there's no side trips,
375
00:20:16,583 --> 00:20:18,750
and like Mussolini's train,
it runs on time.
376
00:20:18,833 --> 00:20:21,541
But that's not really true
about Mussolini and trains.
377
00:20:21,625 --> 00:20:24,791
The improvements
in the railway system preceded him.
378
00:20:24,875 --> 00:20:26,666
He just took the credit.
379
00:20:26,750 --> 00:20:29,500
And even still,
they didn't always run on time.
380
00:20:29,583 --> 00:20:31,666
I wasn't really talking
about Mussolini's train...
381
00:20:31,750 --> 00:20:34,166
And anyway, you...
you can always jump off a train.
382
00:20:34,250 --> 00:20:35,250
In movies.
383
00:20:35,333 --> 00:20:39,833
In real life, you'll probably die
jumping from a moving train.
384
00:20:42,291 --> 00:20:44,125
That's... that's very true.
385
00:20:44,208 --> 00:20:47,583
I suppose I watch too many movies.
386
00:20:48,083 --> 00:20:49,750
Hmm. Everybody does.
387
00:20:50,083 --> 00:20:51,375
Societal malady.
388
00:20:51,458 --> 00:20:54,416
Fill my brain with lies
to pass the time,
389
00:20:54,500 --> 00:20:57,333
in the blink of an eye,
390
00:20:57,416 --> 00:21:01,458
and an eye blink
in excruciatingly slow motion.
391
00:21:01,541 --> 00:21:03,666
It's like the rabies virus,
392
00:21:04,166 --> 00:21:06,625
attaching itself to our ganglia,
393
00:21:06,708 --> 00:21:09,041
changing us into itself.
394
00:21:09,416 --> 00:21:10,708
Viruses are monstrous.
395
00:21:10,791 --> 00:21:12,375
Everything wants to live, Jake.
396
00:21:14,416 --> 00:21:16,791
Viruses are just one more example
of everything.
397
00:21:16,875 --> 00:21:17,875
But...
398
00:21:17,958 --> 00:21:21,166
Even fake, crappy movie ideas
want to live.
399
00:21:21,250 --> 00:21:22,958
Like, they grow in your brain,
400
00:21:23,458 --> 00:21:25,333
replacing real ideas.
401
00:21:25,791 --> 00:21:27,250
That's what makes them dangerous.
402
00:21:27,333 --> 00:21:29,041
But, did you know...
403
00:21:29,833 --> 00:21:32,375
there are insects that blow themselves up?
404
00:21:32,458 --> 00:21:33,833
- Yes.
- Not everything wants to live.
405
00:21:33,916 --> 00:21:35,666
There are certain ants, certain aphids.
406
00:21:35,750 --> 00:21:37,125
For the good of their community.
407
00:21:37,208 --> 00:21:38,875
There are suicide bombers.
408
00:21:45,250 --> 00:21:46,125
Come...
409
00:21:47,208 --> 00:21:48,041
join me.
410
00:21:49,625 --> 00:21:51,583
So not everything wants to live.
411
00:21:53,708 --> 00:21:54,541
Right?
412
00:21:56,291 --> 00:21:58,208
True. Well, they...
413
00:21:58,291 --> 00:22:00,083
they want their communities to live.
414
00:22:00,166 --> 00:22:02,416
Which is sort of like themselves,
writ large.
415
00:22:04,208 --> 00:22:07,000
Anyway, we don't really know
if they want anything.
416
00:22:07,583 --> 00:22:12,083
It's just most likely
how they're programmed.
417
00:22:12,166 --> 00:22:14,000
Maybe we're all programmed, right?
418
00:22:23,875 --> 00:22:25,125
And now we're both dead.
419
00:22:25,208 --> 00:22:26,458
Ta-da!
420
00:22:52,500 --> 00:22:55,875
So, uh, I'm not... I'm not ready to go in.
421
00:22:55,958 --> 00:22:58,541
I-I need to stretch my legs, long legs.
422
00:22:59,333 --> 00:23:00,250
Long drive.
423
00:23:00,708 --> 00:23:02,750
What? What, isn't that rude?
424
00:23:02,833 --> 00:23:05,500
She clearly knows we're here.
We've been waving at each other for...
425
00:23:05,583 --> 00:23:06,666
quite a long time.
426
00:23:06,750 --> 00:23:09,416
They know I like to stretch my legs.
Come on, I'll show you around.
427
00:23:09,500 --> 00:23:12,250
Jake, I don't know,
it's... it's... it's... it's cold
428
00:23:12,333 --> 00:23:14,083
- and it's getting dark.
- Come on.
429
00:23:14,166 --> 00:23:16,250
Come on, I'll give you the abridged tour.
430
00:23:31,416 --> 00:23:32,666
Maybe, we'll...
431
00:23:33,208 --> 00:23:34,666
come back in the spring,
432
00:23:34,750 --> 00:23:38,583
and we can lie out here
and look up at the universe.
433
00:23:44,916 --> 00:23:46,166
The sheep.
434
00:23:52,416 --> 00:23:54,250
Let's say hi.
435
00:23:54,333 --> 00:23:56,375
- Hi, sheep.
- Hi, sheep.
436
00:23:57,583 --> 00:24:00,166
There is something
dreary and sad in here.
437
00:24:00,250 --> 00:24:01,416
And it smells.
438
00:24:01,500 --> 00:24:03,666
I wonder what it must be like
to be a sheep.
439
00:24:03,750 --> 00:24:07,666
Spend one's entire life in this miserable,
smelly place doing nothing.
440
00:24:07,750 --> 00:24:09,791
Eating, shitting, sleeping...
441
00:24:09,875 --> 00:24:12,250
- over and over.
- Well, there you have it.
442
00:24:13,250 --> 00:24:14,625
The sheep.
443
00:24:14,708 --> 00:24:16,833
- What happened to the lambs?
- What?
444
00:24:16,916 --> 00:24:18,291
What will happen...
445
00:24:18,375 --> 00:24:21,208
I don't know what you're asking me.
They're already dead, so wh...
446
00:24:21,291 --> 00:24:23,666
what else can happen to them?
447
00:24:23,750 --> 00:24:27,500
- Well, I mean, will they be buried?
- Probably be burned
448
00:24:27,583 --> 00:24:29,041
come spring.
449
00:24:29,125 --> 00:24:31,666
But they're frozen solid for now,
so they're fine.
450
00:24:33,625 --> 00:24:34,583
No worries.
451
00:24:36,625 --> 00:24:39,625
Come on, I'll show you the... the old pen
where we used to keep the pigs.
452
00:24:39,708 --> 00:24:42,041
They had to put them down.
453
00:24:42,125 --> 00:24:45,416
- That's too bad.
- Rotten situation, the pigs.
454
00:24:45,833 --> 00:24:49,041
Life isn't always pretty on a farm.
Something you should know.
455
00:24:53,208 --> 00:24:55,458
So what... what happened to them?
456
00:24:55,541 --> 00:24:56,958
To the pigs?
457
00:25:01,416 --> 00:25:03,333
Forget it. Uh, I don't think
you'd like the story.
458
00:25:03,416 --> 00:25:05,541
Can't do that. You have to tell me now.
459
00:25:05,625 --> 00:25:07,083
- Yeah?
- Yes! Jesus.
460
00:25:07,166 --> 00:25:08,375
OK, well...
461
00:25:08,833 --> 00:25:09,708
um...
462
00:25:10,791 --> 00:25:12,916
My dad hadn't been in
463
00:25:13,000 --> 00:25:14,458
to check on the pigs for a few days.
464
00:25:14,541 --> 00:25:15,958
My parents were busy.
465
00:25:16,500 --> 00:25:18,958
He'd just tossed their food into the pen.
466
00:25:19,750 --> 00:25:20,958
But after a few days,
467
00:25:21,041 --> 00:25:25,291
he noticed that they were all just lying
in this corner all the time,
468
00:25:25,375 --> 00:25:26,916
so he went in to check on them.
469
00:25:27,000 --> 00:25:27,958
They didn't look well.
470
00:25:28,041 --> 00:25:30,291
He decided he'd better try to move them.
471
00:25:30,375 --> 00:25:31,833
And they're heavy.
472
00:25:33,375 --> 00:25:35,291
They're pigs, right?
473
00:25:35,708 --> 00:25:39,125
But yeah, he... he finally managed
to move one, and discovered...
474
00:25:40,458 --> 00:25:44,791
its entire underside
was filled with maggots.
475
00:25:46,583 --> 00:25:48,375
Both pigs were being eaten alive.
476
00:25:54,791 --> 00:25:57,125
Life can be brutal on a farm.
477
00:26:00,666 --> 00:26:02,291
Should we go inside? It's getting cold.
478
00:26:04,583 --> 00:26:07,375
Everything has to die.
That's the truth.
479
00:26:07,916 --> 00:26:10,750
One likes to think
that there is always hope.
480
00:26:10,833 --> 00:26:12,750
That you can live above death.
481
00:26:13,166 --> 00:26:17,208
And it's a uniquely human fantasy
that things will get better,
482
00:26:17,291 --> 00:26:22,083
born perhaps of the uniquely
human understanding that things will not.
483
00:26:22,666 --> 00:26:24,375
There's no way to know for certain.
484
00:26:24,458 --> 00:26:26,541
But I suspect humans are the only animals
485
00:26:26,625 --> 00:26:28,708
that know the inevitability
of their own deaths.
486
00:26:28,791 --> 00:26:31,458
Other animals live in the present.
487
00:26:32,708 --> 00:26:33,958
Humans cannot,
488
00:26:34,291 --> 00:26:35,791
so they invented hope.
489
00:26:41,500 --> 00:26:42,333
Hello?
490
00:26:45,458 --> 00:26:46,333
Hello?
491
00:26:47,083 --> 00:26:47,958
I'm here.
492
00:26:48,375 --> 00:26:49,208
We're here.
493
00:26:58,083 --> 00:26:59,125
Hello?
494
00:27:00,625 --> 00:27:01,458
Hello?
495
00:27:03,333 --> 00:27:04,416
It's Jake!
496
00:27:06,250 --> 00:27:07,166
Hello?
497
00:27:15,583 --> 00:27:16,416
Hello?
498
00:27:16,500 --> 00:27:18,375
- We'll be right down.
- OK
499
00:27:21,916 --> 00:27:23,625
So...
500
00:27:27,500 --> 00:27:28,958
Do you want slippers?
501
00:27:29,041 --> 00:27:30,750
- I...
- Floors are cold here.
502
00:27:30,833 --> 00:27:33,083
- Old houses. Will you hold this, please?
- Yeah.
503
00:27:33,166 --> 00:27:34,458
Yeah, thanks, I think.
504
00:27:35,166 --> 00:27:36,000
Um...
505
00:27:36,500 --> 00:27:39,916
They'll be big on you.
They're my old ones, but they are warm.
506
00:27:40,000 --> 00:27:42,041
Ah! Voilà.
507
00:27:47,666 --> 00:27:49,125
- None for you?
- No.
508
00:27:49,208 --> 00:27:51,333
No, no. No, no, no, no, no, no,
you should have these.
509
00:27:51,416 --> 00:27:52,416
- These are yours.
- Oh, no.
510
00:27:52,500 --> 00:27:54,625
What kind of gentleman
would that make me?
511
00:27:58,041 --> 00:28:00,750
My slippers are your slippers.
512
00:28:02,083 --> 00:28:03,750
- You sure?
- I am.
513
00:28:09,458 --> 00:28:11,166
Um, have a seat.
514
00:28:21,708 --> 00:28:22,833
They'll be right down.
515
00:28:32,416 --> 00:28:33,416
Music?
516
00:28:33,500 --> 00:28:34,333
Sure.
517
00:29:29,500 --> 00:29:32,625
So, the... the bedrooms are upstairs.
518
00:29:33,208 --> 00:29:34,958
Not much else. Um...
519
00:29:36,583 --> 00:29:38,250
My mom's sewing room,
520
00:29:39,000 --> 00:29:40,666
bedroom, linen closet.
521
00:29:41,958 --> 00:29:42,916
Um...
522
00:29:43,000 --> 00:29:45,208
I can show you after we eat,
523
00:29:45,291 --> 00:29:46,458
if you'd like.
524
00:29:47,833 --> 00:29:48,958
It's not fancy,
525
00:29:49,375 --> 00:29:50,541
as you can see.
526
00:29:50,625 --> 00:29:52,583
It's nice. I like it.
527
00:29:52,666 --> 00:29:54,041
- Yeah?
- Yes.
528
00:29:54,125 --> 00:29:56,000
Reminds me of the house I grew up in.
529
00:29:57,833 --> 00:30:01,583
I suppose all farmhouses are alike.
530
00:30:03,666 --> 00:30:05,333
Like all happy families.
531
00:30:07,041 --> 00:30:09,041
I'm not sure Tolstoy got that one right.
532
00:30:13,250 --> 00:30:16,916
Happiness in a family
is as nuanced as unhappiness.
533
00:30:17,541 --> 00:30:19,333
Well, I think he was
talking about marriage...
534
00:30:19,416 --> 00:30:20,666
Ah, here they come!
535
00:30:30,500 --> 00:30:32,625
I'll just get a fire going
in the meantime.
536
00:30:50,541 --> 00:30:52,583
Your parents knew
we were coming, right?
537
00:30:52,666 --> 00:30:54,458
I mean, they invited us and all...
538
00:30:54,541 --> 00:30:58,791
Invitation sounds a little formal
for my family,
539
00:30:58,875 --> 00:31:00,458
but yeah, of course,
we communicated.
540
00:31:00,541 --> 00:31:01,791
OK, cool.
541
00:31:03,958 --> 00:31:04,875
Hmm.
542
00:31:05,791 --> 00:31:07,250
This fire feels good.
543
00:31:08,916 --> 00:31:09,916
Cozy.
544
00:31:11,166 --> 00:31:12,833
- What's in there?
- The basement.
545
00:31:13,500 --> 00:31:14,375
Oh.
546
00:31:14,833 --> 00:31:15,666
I see.
547
00:31:16,333 --> 00:31:20,041
We keep it closed off, mostly,
'cause old houses tend to be...
548
00:31:20,708 --> 00:31:21,541
drafty.
549
00:31:21,625 --> 00:31:23,083
Right.
550
00:31:25,541 --> 00:31:26,458
Anyway...
551
00:31:27,125 --> 00:31:28,541
the basement is unfinished.
552
00:31:29,416 --> 00:31:31,125
A hole in the ground, really.
553
00:31:31,208 --> 00:31:32,583
A hole in the ground?
554
00:31:33,166 --> 00:31:36,333
Just, water heater, washer and dryer,
stuff like that.
555
00:31:36,875 --> 00:31:39,000
We don't use it really for anything else.
556
00:31:41,083 --> 00:31:43,000
- OK.
- So, it's a waste of space.
557
00:31:44,583 --> 00:31:46,083
I hate the basement, if you...
558
00:31:46,958 --> 00:31:47,958
really want to know.
559
00:31:48,041 --> 00:31:49,833
You have intense feelings about it.
560
00:31:49,916 --> 00:31:51,208
You...
561
00:31:51,291 --> 00:31:52,791
You know, when you're a kid,
562
00:31:53,333 --> 00:31:55,708
uh, basements are scary.
563
00:31:55,791 --> 00:31:58,666
Well, we didn't have one
growing up in an apartment,
564
00:31:58,750 --> 00:32:02,208
but watching those scary movies,
you get the idea.
565
00:32:03,625 --> 00:32:05,791
Don't look down in the basement.
566
00:32:07,875 --> 00:32:08,958
Oh, whoa!
567
00:32:11,708 --> 00:32:13,291
Exactly.
568
00:32:15,458 --> 00:32:17,250
He's hiding in there. Shh.
569
00:32:19,166 --> 00:32:20,375
- Who?
- What?
570
00:32:21,875 --> 00:32:22,708
Um...
571
00:32:23,458 --> 00:32:24,916
What are those scratches on the door?
572
00:32:26,541 --> 00:32:29,208
Dog. From the dog, mostly.
573
00:32:32,166 --> 00:32:33,125
I...
574
00:32:33,208 --> 00:32:34,125
I love dogs.
575
00:32:35,666 --> 00:32:37,416
I didn't know your parents have a dog!
576
00:32:37,500 --> 00:32:39,708
I usually can tell when there's a dog
in someone's house.
577
00:32:39,791 --> 00:32:42,458
- Toys lying around, and...
- My folks are tidy.
578
00:32:42,541 --> 00:32:45,208
Well, where is it? What...
what kind? What's its name?
579
00:32:46,041 --> 00:32:48,125
So many questions. Uh, Jimmy.
580
00:32:49,208 --> 00:32:50,291
He's a border collie.
581
00:32:50,708 --> 00:32:52,625
Probably outside, or...
582
00:32:52,708 --> 00:32:55,416
Oh! Hi, Jimmy!
583
00:32:55,500 --> 00:32:56,500
Hi!
584
00:32:58,083 --> 00:32:59,958
Oh, he's all wet.
585
00:33:03,333 --> 00:33:05,916
- That's...
- Ah! Here they come.
586
00:33:06,000 --> 00:33:07,416
Oh!
587
00:33:07,500 --> 00:33:08,333
Oh!
588
00:33:10,000 --> 00:33:10,958
Aww!
589
00:33:11,041 --> 00:33:12,208
Was the drive OK?
590
00:33:12,291 --> 00:33:13,250
Yeah, fine.
591
00:33:13,333 --> 00:33:14,166
Oh.
592
00:33:14,250 --> 00:33:16,125
- So glad to meet you, Louisa.
- Oh.
593
00:33:16,208 --> 00:33:18,958
Jake has told us
so much about you.
594
00:33:19,041 --> 00:33:22,000
Oh, he's told me so much
about both of you too.
595
00:33:22,083 --> 00:33:24,083
Oh. And you came anyway?
596
00:33:29,791 --> 00:33:30,625
Hi.
597
00:33:39,583 --> 00:33:42,916
Well, let's eat. All the food
will be as cold as a witch's tit
598
00:33:43,000 --> 00:33:44,333
in a brass brassiere.
599
00:33:58,625 --> 00:34:01,333
- Oh, it smells great.
- I hope you're hungry.
600
00:34:01,416 --> 00:34:04,333
All homemade. Everything you see
on the table is from the farm.
601
00:34:10,541 --> 00:34:11,416
Looks lovely.
602
00:34:11,500 --> 00:34:12,541
So...
603
00:34:12,625 --> 00:34:14,333
Jake tells us you're a painter.
604
00:34:14,416 --> 00:34:16,458
Yes! Jake tells you correctly.
605
00:34:16,541 --> 00:34:18,250
I don't really know much about art,
606
00:34:18,333 --> 00:34:20,708
but I like pictures where you know
what you're looking at.
607
00:34:20,791 --> 00:34:23,375
What's it called? Uh, abstract.
I don't get that.
608
00:34:23,458 --> 00:34:27,500
I could do abstract. Smear some paint on,
what's it called?
609
00:34:28,208 --> 00:34:31,041
Canvas. I think it's a con job
if you ask me.
610
00:34:31,458 --> 00:34:33,791
I like paintings
that look like photographs.
611
00:34:34,416 --> 00:34:37,708
I couldn't do that in a million years.
That is talent.
612
00:34:37,791 --> 00:34:43,708
Why... why not just take a photograph,
Dad, if you like photographs?
613
00:34:43,791 --> 00:34:46,958
It's much quicker, and photographs look
exactly like photographs.
614
00:34:47,041 --> 00:34:50,250
I like photographs,
mostly sports photographs.
615
00:34:50,333 --> 00:34:52,250
What kind of paintings
do you make, Lucy?
616
00:34:54,041 --> 00:34:57,833
Uh, well, I-I'm not an abstract artist,
so that's in my favor.
617
00:34:57,916 --> 00:35:00,875
Good! You see, that's exactly my point.
You see? Good!
618
00:35:00,958 --> 00:35:02,750
I-I do mostly landscape.
619
00:35:03,541 --> 00:35:05,666
Like outside paintings?
620
00:35:05,750 --> 00:35:08,000
Uh, yes! Mm-hmm. Plein air.
621
00:35:08,333 --> 00:35:10,583
Which is outdoor painting.
622
00:35:10,666 --> 00:35:14,500
I try to capture the feel
of light and atmosphere.
623
00:35:14,583 --> 00:35:15,541
That sounds lovely.
624
00:35:15,625 --> 00:35:17,416
- Jake used to paint too, of course.
- Mom!
625
00:35:17,500 --> 00:35:19,750
- He worked really hard at it.
- Aww.
626
00:35:20,500 --> 00:35:21,500
I didn't know that.
627
00:35:21,583 --> 00:35:23,083
- He was very good.
- Mom.
628
00:35:23,166 --> 00:35:24,000
Aww.
629
00:35:27,750 --> 00:35:31,625
I try to imbue my work with a sort of...
630
00:35:31,708 --> 00:35:32,708
interiority.
631
00:35:32,791 --> 00:35:34,583
Interiority. So you paint...
632
00:35:35,291 --> 00:35:37,000
- inside?
- Well, inside my head.
633
00:35:37,083 --> 00:35:40,208
So a landscape would attempt to express
how I feel at that time.
634
00:35:40,291 --> 00:35:42,916
Lonely, joyous, worried, s-sad.
635
00:35:43,625 --> 00:35:45,083
That sounds very interesting.
636
00:35:45,916 --> 00:35:49,541
Like that painting of that girl,
sitting in a field, looking at a house.
637
00:35:49,625 --> 00:35:50,958
Christina's World. Wyeth.
638
00:35:51,041 --> 00:35:52,708
Yes. Exactly.
639
00:35:53,166 --> 00:35:54,375
But without people.
640
00:35:54,458 --> 00:35:55,375
Uh...
641
00:35:55,458 --> 00:35:58,541
How can a picture of a field be sad
642
00:35:58,625 --> 00:36:01,708
without a sad person
looking sad in the field?
643
00:36:03,666 --> 00:36:05,333
That's an interesting problem.
644
00:36:05,416 --> 00:36:06,250
I...
645
00:36:06,333 --> 00:36:07,708
Yeah, I-I-I-I...
646
00:36:07,791 --> 00:36:09,416
I... I struggle with that.
647
00:36:10,416 --> 00:36:11,333
Uh...
648
00:36:11,416 --> 00:36:16,333
Well, I have some pictures of my work,
if you'd like to see them.
649
00:36:18,291 --> 00:36:20,333
Oh, yes!
650
00:36:20,416 --> 00:36:21,583
- Yeah?
- Yes?
651
00:36:21,666 --> 00:36:23,500
- Yes!
- Yeah?
652
00:36:37,416 --> 00:36:38,250
Uh...
653
00:36:41,333 --> 00:36:42,166
These here.
654
00:36:44,791 --> 00:36:45,666
Mmm!
655
00:36:46,791 --> 00:36:47,833
Mmm.
656
00:36:47,916 --> 00:36:48,750
Mmm.
657
00:36:49,916 --> 00:36:50,750
Ah.
658
00:36:53,958 --> 00:36:55,375
Mmm. Ah!
659
00:36:56,125 --> 00:36:57,916
Mmm. I mean, they're pretty,
660
00:36:58,000 --> 00:37:01,750
but I don't see how it's supposed
to make me feel something
661
00:37:01,833 --> 00:37:04,583
if there's not a person in them
feeling something.
662
00:37:04,666 --> 00:37:07,750
If there's not a person in them
feeling sad or joyous
663
00:37:07,833 --> 00:37:09,708
or whatever other emotion you said.
664
00:37:10,958 --> 00:37:15,791
Well, m-maybe think of yourself
as the person looking out at the scene.
665
00:37:15,875 --> 00:37:17,458
I'd have to see me in them.
666
00:37:17,875 --> 00:37:20,083
Well, if you were there,
you wouldn't see yourself, right?
667
00:37:20,166 --> 00:37:22,541
Well, I would if I looked down.
I'm not a ghost.
668
00:37:22,625 --> 00:37:24,125
- Yet.
- I can attest to that.
669
00:37:24,208 --> 00:37:25,750
Especially in the bedroom.
670
00:37:27,625 --> 00:37:30,500
I mean, but if you were there
671
00:37:30,583 --> 00:37:32,208
looking out at it without looking down,
672
00:37:32,291 --> 00:37:34,333
you'd... you'd see the scene
and you'd feel something.
673
00:37:34,416 --> 00:37:37,000
Anything an environment makes you feel
is about you,
674
00:37:37,083 --> 00:37:38,666
not the environment, right?
675
00:37:39,208 --> 00:37:40,166
None of...
676
00:37:40,250 --> 00:37:42,791
none of the feeling
is inherent to the place.
677
00:37:42,875 --> 00:37:44,750
Uh, that's over my head, I guess.
678
00:37:45,250 --> 00:37:48,083
They are pretty, though.
You're very talented.
679
00:37:48,750 --> 00:37:50,333
- Thank you.
- I like the colors.
680
00:37:50,416 --> 00:37:51,500
Thanks.
681
00:37:51,958 --> 00:37:55,916
Psst, Jake, you didn't tell us
your girlfriend was so talented.
682
00:37:56,000 --> 00:37:57,708
I did, actually.
683
00:38:00,041 --> 00:38:02,125
Anyway, uh...
684
00:38:02,833 --> 00:38:04,083
I mean, sometimes I...
685
00:38:04,166 --> 00:38:05,250
I would've thought...
686
00:38:05,875 --> 00:38:06,708
Mmm...
687
00:38:06,791 --> 00:38:07,625
Because...
688
00:38:12,875 --> 00:38:14,166
Uh, so...
689
00:38:14,250 --> 00:38:15,458
Jake...
690
00:38:16,041 --> 00:38:19,166
tells me you're studying quantum psychics
at the university.
691
00:38:19,250 --> 00:38:20,916
- Yes.
- Physics.
692
00:38:21,000 --> 00:38:22,250
- Really?
- Yeah.
693
00:38:23,083 --> 00:38:25,083
That's unusual for a girl, isn't it?
694
00:38:25,666 --> 00:38:26,750
Yes, it is, actually.
695
00:38:26,833 --> 00:38:28,083
I'm just asking.
696
00:38:29,458 --> 00:38:32,666
A little less so these days,
which I think is a good thing.
697
00:38:32,750 --> 00:38:35,416
Well, after seventh grade,
698
00:38:35,500 --> 00:38:37,708
I couldn't understand
what Jake was saying,
699
00:38:37,791 --> 00:38:41,708
so it's wonderful he has someone
he can share all his ideas with.
700
00:38:41,791 --> 00:38:47,166
Jake tells us there's been lots of famous
husband and wife physicists.
701
00:38:47,250 --> 00:38:48,791
- Ooh!
- Dad!
702
00:38:49,916 --> 00:38:50,833
Yeah.
703
00:38:50,916 --> 00:38:53,208
I guess there have been some.
704
00:38:53,583 --> 00:38:56,541
Uh, Pierre and Marie Curie
shared a Nobel Prize in physics.
705
00:38:56,625 --> 00:38:58,375
Well, even I've heard of them.
706
00:38:58,458 --> 00:39:00,458
Well, I've heard of her anyway, radiation.
707
00:39:00,541 --> 00:39:02,333
- Uh, radioactivity.
- Radium.
708
00:39:02,416 --> 00:39:06,166
- Yes.
- I am so glad Jake has found someone.
709
00:39:07,541 --> 00:39:10,000
Won't you please tell us the story
of how you met?
710
00:39:10,500 --> 00:39:11,750
Jake has refused.
711
00:39:11,833 --> 00:39:13,416
I love romantic meeting stories.
712
00:39:13,500 --> 00:39:14,916
Like in Forget Paris.
713
00:39:15,416 --> 00:39:17,500
- Billy Crystal?
- I didn't like that movie.
714
00:39:17,583 --> 00:39:20,083
Billy Crystal is a nancy.
715
00:39:22,416 --> 00:39:23,333
Um...
716
00:39:27,000 --> 00:39:28,750
So...
717
00:39:28,833 --> 00:39:29,791
Uh...
718
00:39:29,875 --> 00:39:33,583
I went with a friend
to a bar near campus, and...
719
00:39:34,291 --> 00:39:35,708
it turned out to be trivia night.
720
00:39:35,791 --> 00:39:38,375
Oh, I love this so far!
Jake is crazy about trivia!
721
00:39:38,458 --> 00:39:40,541
We used to play
the Genius Edition of the...
722
00:39:40,625 --> 00:39:42,333
- We used to play the Genius Edition...
- Genus.
723
00:39:42,416 --> 00:39:44,208
- We used to play the Genius Edition...
- Genus!
724
00:39:44,291 --> 00:39:45,916
…of Trivial Pursuit. What?
725
00:39:46,000 --> 00:39:47,208
It's Genus Edition.
726
00:39:47,291 --> 00:39:52,000
Oh, I always thought the word was genius.
I've been saying it wrong all these years.
727
00:39:52,083 --> 00:39:53,958
Goes to show, I'm no genus!
728
00:39:57,291 --> 00:39:58,500
That's a good one.
729
00:39:58,583 --> 00:39:59,958
No, no, no.
730
00:40:01,041 --> 00:40:02,000
Genus is not...
731
00:40:02,083 --> 00:40:04,041
the same as genius.
732
00:40:04,125 --> 00:40:05,958
A genus is a category.
733
00:40:06,041 --> 00:40:07,916
I always thought
it was the Genius Edition.
734
00:40:08,000 --> 00:40:11,041
I told everyone he knew every answer
in the Genius Edition.
735
00:40:11,125 --> 00:40:13,250
I was very proud of that.
736
00:40:13,916 --> 00:40:16,416
- Why didn't we get the Genius...
- There is no...
737
00:40:19,541 --> 00:40:22,458
- Genius Edition.
- OK.
738
00:40:39,666 --> 00:40:41,375
So, Jake was
with his trivia team,
739
00:40:41,458 --> 00:40:43,708
and my friend and I
found an empty table near him,
740
00:40:43,791 --> 00:40:45,166
and I was watching him.
741
00:40:45,250 --> 00:40:48,541
- Because you thought he was cute!
- Yeah, I did.
742
00:40:48,625 --> 00:40:52,791
And he was very serious about the game,
which I found, I don't know, charming.
743
00:40:53,291 --> 00:40:55,416
And... Oh, his team was called...
744
00:40:55,500 --> 00:40:58,333
- Brezhnev's Eyebrows.
- Brezhnev's Eyebrows, right.
745
00:40:58,416 --> 00:41:00,375
I asked who Brezhnev was,
746
00:41:00,458 --> 00:41:02,750
basically so I could say something to him.
747
00:41:02,833 --> 00:41:06,708
And he told me
that Brezhnev was a Soviet engineer.
748
00:41:06,791 --> 00:41:10,958
And a general of the...
749
00:41:11,041 --> 00:41:14,083
- Uh, the section head of...
- Secretary of the Communist Party.
750
00:41:14,541 --> 00:41:15,875
During the age of starvation.
751
00:41:15,958 --> 00:41:17,458
- Stagnation.
- Stagnation.
752
00:41:17,541 --> 00:41:19,333
Anyway, those team names
drive me nuts usually.
753
00:41:19,416 --> 00:41:21,583
They all have the most teams show-offy.
754
00:41:21,666 --> 00:41:24,458
But I don't know, it didn't
bother me so much with Jake.
755
00:41:24,541 --> 00:41:26,708
I guess I didn't let it
because I thought he was cute.
756
00:41:26,791 --> 00:41:30,000
Aw, he is cute, isn't he?
757
00:41:30,083 --> 00:41:33,541
So I-I-I was trying to get up the nerve
to talk to him, because...
758
00:41:33,625 --> 00:41:35,833
even though he looked over at me
more than once,
759
00:41:35,916 --> 00:41:37,875
it was clear he wasn't gonna say anything.
760
00:41:37,958 --> 00:41:42,208
I thought you said
you were talking about Brezhnev?
761
00:41:48,666 --> 00:41:49,625
Uh...
762
00:41:52,833 --> 00:41:55,000
Yes, that's true.
763
00:41:55,833 --> 00:41:57,958
But we didn't talk anymore after that,
764
00:41:58,041 --> 00:41:59,291
I guess is what I meant.
765
00:41:59,375 --> 00:42:00,833
Oh.
766
00:42:08,500 --> 00:42:12,208
So I said something stupid, like,
"You guys seem to be doing well."
767
00:42:16,250 --> 00:42:19,250
And I had to practically yell it,
it was so noisy.
768
00:42:19,333 --> 00:42:22,750
And Jake... Jake raised his glass
and went, "Well, yeah,
769
00:42:22,833 --> 00:42:24,458
well, we're helpfully fortified."
770
00:42:24,541 --> 00:42:26,666
And I laughed, which broke the ice,
771
00:42:26,750 --> 00:42:29,125
and I think he was egged on
by my laughing,
772
00:42:29,208 --> 00:42:33,500
'cause he went on to tell me
that he was a cruc...
773
00:42:33,583 --> 00:42:34,958
- Verbalist.
- Verbalist.
774
00:42:35,041 --> 00:42:36,583
And I didn't know what that meant.
775
00:42:36,666 --> 00:42:38,791
But I-I didn't want to admit that,
so I just said,
776
00:42:38,875 --> 00:42:39,708
- "Cool."
- Cool.
777
00:42:39,791 --> 00:42:42,208
And he was showing off again,
and poorly,
778
00:42:42,291 --> 00:42:45,500
and I thought, "This guy is awkward.
He has no game at all."
779
00:42:45,583 --> 00:42:49,041
And there was something
sort of appealing about that.
780
00:42:50,750 --> 00:42:51,916
But then he kept going.
781
00:42:52,000 --> 00:42:57,708
And he told me that he wanted
his team name to be Ipseity,
782
00:42:58,166 --> 00:42:59,625
and I was like, "Ugh."
783
00:42:59,708 --> 00:43:01,125
You didn't like him anymore?
784
00:43:04,375 --> 00:43:05,250
No.
785
00:43:09,083 --> 00:43:10,041
I did.
786
00:43:12,250 --> 00:43:13,958
I just wanted that stuff to stop.
787
00:43:14,041 --> 00:43:14,875
So I told him,
788
00:43:14,958 --> 00:43:17,833
"You know I don't know that word.
Why don't you just cut the crap?"
789
00:43:19,833 --> 00:43:22,125
And he said something like,
"I'm an asshole."
790
00:43:32,416 --> 00:43:34,333
"I'm not very good at talking to people,
791
00:43:34,416 --> 00:43:36,875
and ipseity is just another word
for selfhood."
792
00:43:36,958 --> 00:43:41,000
Anyway, after that, he talked
like a normal person, and he was funny.
793
00:43:41,083 --> 00:43:43,791
And I could see he wanted to ask
for my number,
794
00:43:43,875 --> 00:43:45,000
but was shy.
795
00:43:45,625 --> 00:43:47,708
And I was getting up to go.
796
00:43:47,791 --> 00:43:49,875
My girlfriend wanted to leave.
797
00:43:49,958 --> 00:43:50,958
And Jake...
798
00:43:51,041 --> 00:43:52,708
blurted out, could he have my number?
799
00:43:52,791 --> 00:43:54,166
Oh!
800
00:43:54,250 --> 00:43:56,708
There you go... Jake.
801
00:43:56,791 --> 00:43:58,291
It's about time.
802
00:43:59,958 --> 00:44:01,458
And the rest was history.
803
00:44:02,000 --> 00:44:02,958
That was like...
804
00:44:04,333 --> 00:44:05,666
six weeks ago?
805
00:44:06,125 --> 00:44:07,250
God, feels longer.
806
00:44:10,458 --> 00:44:13,083
Feels like forever, in a way.
807
00:44:13,750 --> 00:44:14,583
I can't...
808
00:44:16,666 --> 00:44:18,750
I can't even remember how long ago it is.
809
00:44:42,791 --> 00:44:43,750
I'll be right with you.
810
00:44:43,833 --> 00:44:46,041
Hello, welcome to Red Line.
811
00:44:46,125 --> 00:44:47,958
I'm Yvonne. I'll be taking care
of you today.
812
00:44:48,041 --> 00:44:49,083
There's a guy behind you.
813
00:44:51,041 --> 00:44:51,875
Really?
814
00:44:54,375 --> 00:44:55,833
That's Nimrod.
815
00:44:55,916 --> 00:44:58,541
He's the idiot waiter-in-training
trailing me.
816
00:44:59,125 --> 00:45:01,041
- Hi, I'm Nimrod.
- Hey.
817
00:45:01,500 --> 00:45:04,333
So are you folks ready to order,
or can I answer questions about the menu?
818
00:45:04,416 --> 00:45:06,833
- How is the Santa Fe burger?
- Very popular.
819
00:45:07,125 --> 00:45:09,041
OK, so, uh, which do you prefer,
820
00:45:09,125 --> 00:45:12,250
the Santa Fe burger or the Natchez burger?
821
00:45:12,333 --> 00:45:14,791
Hmm, that's a tough one.
They're both really, really good.
822
00:45:14,875 --> 00:45:18,416
- You don't have a favorite?
- Um, I guess I would say the...
823
00:45:18,500 --> 00:45:20,208
Look, man, she's a vegan, so...
824
00:45:20,291 --> 00:45:22,791
- What the hell are you doing?
- No, look. What you don't know
825
00:45:22,875 --> 00:45:26,250
about this amazing woman in front of you
is that she's not a waitress.
826
00:45:26,333 --> 00:45:28,500
- Can you please leave?
- She is a waitress.
827
00:45:28,583 --> 00:45:31,041
But only to put herself through school
so that she can become
828
00:45:31,125 --> 00:45:33,333
- an animal rights lawyer.
- OK.
829
00:45:33,416 --> 00:45:35,791
No, not a crumb of meat or dairy
has crossed her lips
830
00:45:35,875 --> 00:45:37,208
since she was five years old.
831
00:45:37,291 --> 00:45:40,958
And she realized that a...
that a hamburger is just a ground-up cow.
832
00:45:41,041 --> 00:45:43,416
She spent the rest of her life trying...
833
00:45:43,500 --> 00:45:45,583
She spent the rest of her life
trying to make the world
834
00:45:45,666 --> 00:45:47,958
a better place for animals,
and I love her!
835
00:45:48,458 --> 00:45:51,416
I love her! I love her
because she's the most beautiful...
836
00:45:57,083 --> 00:45:58,958
That was beautiful, Yvonne.
837
00:45:59,041 --> 00:45:59,916
You're fired.
838
00:46:08,041 --> 00:46:09,750
I needed that job, idiot.
839
00:46:11,958 --> 00:46:12,791
I know.
840
00:46:18,875 --> 00:46:20,125
Did you say you love me?
841
00:46:23,916 --> 00:46:24,791
I did.
842
00:46:33,333 --> 00:46:34,166
Idiot.
843
00:46:41,583 --> 00:46:43,416
Well, that was lovely.
844
00:46:43,500 --> 00:46:45,958
- We gotta get on the road.
- Jake was always a good boy.
845
00:46:46,041 --> 00:46:48,958
He was even awarded a diligence pin
at school, you remember?
846
00:46:49,041 --> 00:46:51,041
- Still working on that?
- Nah.
847
00:46:51,125 --> 00:46:53,125
Diligence. At eight, can you believe that?
848
00:46:53,208 --> 00:46:56,541
It was quite a thing. His father and I
never got awarded any such pin at eight.
849
00:46:56,625 --> 00:46:58,166
- At any age.
- True enough.
850
00:46:58,250 --> 00:46:59,250
At no age.
851
00:46:59,333 --> 00:47:02,500
I won a bunch of sports trophies,
but never a diligence trophy.
852
00:47:02,583 --> 00:47:04,875
I don't imagine I knew the word diligence
at eight!
853
00:47:04,958 --> 00:47:07,125
But Jake knew it. You knew.
854
00:47:07,208 --> 00:47:08,333
Jake knew.
855
00:47:08,666 --> 00:47:10,583
Jake knew. Remember how excited you were
856
00:47:10,666 --> 00:47:12,125
- about that diligence pin?
- No.
857
00:47:12,208 --> 00:47:14,416
- He wore it to school.
- I didn't.
858
00:47:14,500 --> 00:47:17,000
He did, every day. You did!
859
00:47:17,083 --> 00:47:20,208
No, I was disappointed.
I wanted the acumen pin.
860
00:47:20,500 --> 00:47:21,541
Diligence...
861
00:47:22,000 --> 00:47:23,375
is an also ran.
862
00:47:23,458 --> 00:47:25,750
"You there, you worked very hard,
you're not very bright,
863
00:47:25,833 --> 00:47:27,458
but we're impressed
that you tried anyway."
864
00:47:27,541 --> 00:47:28,833
Oh, don't be sour.
865
00:47:28,916 --> 00:47:31,875
It was a lovely pin, sweetheart.
866
00:47:31,958 --> 00:47:33,416
Jakey.
867
00:47:34,875 --> 00:47:35,708
Dessert?
868
00:47:36,166 --> 00:47:38,875
I made Jake's favorite chocolate cake.
869
00:47:42,750 --> 00:47:43,625
Lovely.
870
00:47:45,125 --> 00:47:47,291
Of course, I never turn down
anything chocolate.
871
00:47:47,375 --> 00:47:48,291
Lovely.
872
00:47:55,083 --> 00:47:56,375
Help me.
873
00:47:57,958 --> 00:47:59,916
I'll serve dessert in the sitting room.
874
00:48:00,958 --> 00:48:02,791
That's from My Fair Lady.
875
00:48:03,416 --> 00:48:06,500
- That was you! Yes!
- She said he was a nancy.
876
00:48:06,583 --> 00:48:09,000
You've been saying that one
for years!
877
00:48:09,083 --> 00:48:12,125
Oh, you cannot keep doing this!
878
00:48:12,208 --> 00:48:13,833
You seem so quiet.
879
00:48:15,125 --> 00:48:16,041
You OK?
880
00:48:20,250 --> 00:48:21,083
Do you like them?
881
00:48:22,000 --> 00:48:23,000
They're very nice.
882
00:48:24,291 --> 00:48:25,541
Very nice parents.
883
00:48:26,166 --> 00:48:27,541
You chose well, my friend.
884
00:48:28,291 --> 00:48:29,791
- Yeah.
- Yes.
885
00:48:29,875 --> 00:48:31,583
- Yeah.
- Yes.
886
00:48:33,500 --> 00:48:34,416
Of course.
887
00:48:35,750 --> 00:48:37,041
They love you a lot.
888
00:48:38,250 --> 00:48:40,416
- Yeah.
- Prime importance in parents.
889
00:48:43,250 --> 00:48:44,333
I suppose.
890
00:48:49,791 --> 00:48:51,083
We've had our issues.
891
00:48:51,166 --> 00:48:53,541
Jesus, everyone's had issues
with their parents.
892
00:48:56,750 --> 00:48:58,458
Hey, what happened to Jimmy?
893
00:49:00,083 --> 00:49:02,833
Aw, here he is!
894
00:49:02,916 --> 00:49:04,958
You're a stinky wet monster, huh?
895
00:49:05,041 --> 00:49:06,458
Sorry!
896
00:49:07,625 --> 00:49:09,416
- Sorry.
- About?
897
00:49:09,500 --> 00:49:10,625
His smell.
898
00:49:11,375 --> 00:49:12,291
Jake, he's a dog.
899
00:49:13,375 --> 00:49:14,875
It's fine. Jimmy...
900
00:49:29,041 --> 00:49:30,541
Hey, who is this?
901
00:49:31,375 --> 00:49:32,583
You can't tell?
902
00:49:34,458 --> 00:49:35,291
No.
903
00:49:39,666 --> 00:49:40,541
It's me.
904
00:49:41,125 --> 00:49:43,541
No, it was me.
W-Wasn't it me?
905
00:49:43,625 --> 00:49:45,333
- H-How...
- Sorry for the delay...
906
00:49:45,416 --> 00:49:47,750
- Oh, God.
- Kitchen emergency, don't you know.
907
00:49:47,833 --> 00:49:50,875
Well, here it is,
Jake's favorite. Ta-da!
908
00:49:50,958 --> 00:49:52,416
Chocolate yule log.
909
00:49:52,500 --> 00:49:53,958
Mm-mm.
910
00:49:54,041 --> 00:49:56,125
Even though it's well past yule.
911
00:49:56,208 --> 00:49:59,291
Reminds me of when Jake
used to suck his thumb.
912
00:49:59,375 --> 00:50:01,583
Well past the age
when he should've stopped.
913
00:50:02,208 --> 00:50:05,208
He'd say, "Yule, yule, yule..."
914
00:50:05,291 --> 00:50:06,250
As he sucked it.
915
00:50:06,333 --> 00:50:09,208
Yule log. Kinda looks like thumb!
916
00:50:10,416 --> 00:50:11,791
Looks great.
917
00:50:14,125 --> 00:50:15,083
Enjoy!
918
00:50:15,166 --> 00:50:16,000
Thank you.
919
00:50:16,083 --> 00:50:17,708
It really looks amazing.
920
00:50:17,791 --> 00:50:19,500
Thank you. Enjoy.
921
00:50:19,583 --> 00:50:20,708
Oh!
922
00:50:20,791 --> 00:50:21,750
God.
923
00:50:21,833 --> 00:50:24,000
I've been having problems with my ears.
924
00:50:24,083 --> 00:50:27,625
Just in case anyone is wondering why
I keep pulling at my ears all night long.
925
00:50:27,708 --> 00:50:29,041
More than a problem.
926
00:50:29,125 --> 00:50:30,541
Tinnitus.
927
00:50:30,625 --> 00:50:32,375
It is what it is, as they say.
928
00:50:32,458 --> 00:50:33,541
What is tinnitus?
929
00:50:33,625 --> 00:50:35,416
Not very much fun is what.
930
00:50:35,500 --> 00:50:37,125
Not very much fun.
931
00:50:37,583 --> 00:50:39,208
But shit happens, as they say.
932
00:50:42,125 --> 00:50:44,041
I hear a kind of buzzing in my ears.
933
00:50:44,125 --> 00:50:46,041
Well, not so much a buzzing,
more of a hiss.
934
00:50:46,125 --> 00:50:47,083
Well, more of a...
935
00:50:47,625 --> 00:50:48,500
whisper.
936
00:50:49,833 --> 00:50:51,041
Oh, always?
937
00:50:51,458 --> 00:50:52,291
Yes!
938
00:50:52,916 --> 00:50:55,333
As if I'm constantly being whispered to.
939
00:51:03,583 --> 00:51:06,291
Maybe it's sharing the secrets
of the universe with me.
940
00:51:08,333 --> 00:51:09,541
But I can't tell.
941
00:51:12,625 --> 00:51:14,583
Maybe it's giving me stock market tips.
942
00:51:15,958 --> 00:51:17,458
Oh, we'd be rich!
943
00:51:19,000 --> 00:51:20,125
Sorry, sorry.
944
00:51:20,208 --> 00:51:22,666
I... I thought it had been turned off.
945
00:51:22,750 --> 00:51:24,250
Um...
946
00:51:25,250 --> 00:51:26,875
- See my glasses?
- Here you are.
947
00:51:31,916 --> 00:51:33,583
It's just a friend.
948
00:51:33,666 --> 00:51:35,833
- Her friend calls a lot.
- Well, you can take it.
949
00:51:35,916 --> 00:51:37,583
You should take it.
We won't think it rude.
950
00:51:37,666 --> 00:51:39,125
No, it's OK. It's not important.
951
00:51:39,208 --> 00:51:41,583
You don't know. It might be.
It's a blizzard out there.
952
00:51:41,666 --> 00:51:43,625
- She might be stranded.
- It's OK.
953
00:51:43,708 --> 00:51:46,166
Is it a blizzard now?
We... We don't want to get stuck.
954
00:51:46,250 --> 00:51:48,166
- Stuck? Stuck?
- It's OK. I've got the chains.
955
00:51:48,250 --> 00:51:49,875
I've... I've got to work early tomorrow.
956
00:51:49,958 --> 00:51:51,208
Oh, you put the chains on?
957
00:51:51,291 --> 00:51:53,750
No, not yet, but they're in...
they're in the bed.
958
00:51:53,833 --> 00:51:55,583
Chains should make it fine.
959
00:51:55,666 --> 00:51:56,666
What? I'm sorry.
960
00:51:56,750 --> 00:51:58,583
- The chains.
- Oh, God.
961
00:51:59,208 --> 00:52:02,083
- The whispers, I call them.
- The night is the worst.
962
00:52:02,166 --> 00:52:03,500
- What is?
- Night!
963
00:52:03,583 --> 00:52:04,958
Oh, night is the worst.
964
00:52:05,416 --> 00:52:06,666
I don't sleep much anymore.
965
00:52:06,750 --> 00:52:09,208
Oh, that sounds very difficult. I'm sorry.
966
00:52:09,291 --> 00:52:11,041
- Sorry?
- I just said I'm sorry!
967
00:52:11,125 --> 00:52:11,958
Oh.
968
00:52:12,041 --> 00:52:13,375
We're both saying sorry!
969
00:52:16,208 --> 00:52:18,958
- You should take your call though.
- It could be an emergency.
970
00:52:19,041 --> 00:52:19,875
It's fine.
971
00:52:20,333 --> 00:52:21,208
I-I-I-I...
972
00:52:21,750 --> 00:52:25,000
- I know what she's calling about.
- You should at least listen to the message
973
00:52:25,083 --> 00:52:25,916
OK!
974
00:52:28,916 --> 00:52:30,041
Sure.
975
00:52:36,458 --> 00:52:38,416
There's only one question
to resolve.
976
00:52:38,500 --> 00:52:40,708
I'm scared. I feel a little crazy.
977
00:52:40,791 --> 00:52:42,125
I'm not lucid. How...
978
00:52:42,208 --> 00:52:43,583
The assumptions are right.
979
00:52:43,666 --> 00:52:45,083
I can feel my fear growing.
980
00:52:45,166 --> 00:52:47,958
Now is the time for the answer,
just one question.
981
00:52:48,041 --> 00:52:49,416
One question to answer.
982
00:52:53,416 --> 00:52:54,666
- She's fine.
- Eh?
983
00:52:55,166 --> 00:52:56,958
Wh... what did she want?
984
00:52:57,041 --> 00:52:59,208
Oh, she was just calling to say hi.
985
00:52:59,291 --> 00:53:00,250
How nice.
986
00:53:00,333 --> 00:53:01,666
Friends are important.
987
00:53:02,250 --> 00:53:05,958
Jake never really had a lot of them
growing up. Or even after.
988
00:53:07,125 --> 00:53:08,583
Remember your 50th birthday?
989
00:53:08,666 --> 00:53:10,625
- Twentieth.
- What did I say?
990
00:53:10,708 --> 00:53:12,125
- Fiftieth.
- Fiftieth.
991
00:53:12,208 --> 00:53:13,666
Oh.
992
00:53:13,750 --> 00:53:15,625
Goodness, where is my brain?
993
00:53:18,291 --> 00:53:19,125
Anyway.
994
00:53:20,916 --> 00:53:22,208
Friends can be helpful.
995
00:53:22,750 --> 00:53:24,791
Hmm. That's what I've always found.
996
00:53:25,750 --> 00:53:27,916
'Cause life can be difficult.
997
00:53:29,083 --> 00:53:30,208
On a farm.
998
00:53:30,291 --> 00:53:33,875
Doesn't get any easier
as it trudges along, I'll say that.
999
00:53:35,041 --> 00:53:36,916
- What?
- Doesn't get any easier.
1000
00:53:37,000 --> 00:53:38,583
- What doesn't?
- Life!
1001
00:53:38,666 --> 00:53:41,916
Oh, no, it doesn't.
It's basically a fast train to hell.
1002
00:53:42,000 --> 00:53:43,166
For God's sake, Mom!
1003
00:53:43,250 --> 00:53:46,208
All right, all right, yes.
I'm overstating it. I agree.
1004
00:53:47,375 --> 00:53:48,708
It's a fast train to heck!
1005
00:54:05,458 --> 00:54:07,416
Your mother was always very funny.
1006
00:54:09,416 --> 00:54:10,916
It's what I loved about her.
1007
00:54:12,291 --> 00:54:13,250
I think it's the...
1008
00:54:14,166 --> 00:54:16,250
the first thing that I fell in love with.
1009
00:54:18,958 --> 00:54:22,333
Kind of... faded as she got older.
1010
00:54:24,083 --> 00:54:25,833
Wears you down, I guess.
1011
00:54:26,958 --> 00:54:28,541
It's not so funny anymore.
1012
00:54:32,125 --> 00:54:33,416
I miss her terribly.
1013
00:54:34,791 --> 00:54:35,625
Yeah.
1014
00:54:47,166 --> 00:54:48,250
So, Lucia...
1015
00:54:49,041 --> 00:54:50,708
is studying gerontology.
1016
00:54:51,833 --> 00:54:53,333
Oh, really?
1017
00:54:53,416 --> 00:54:55,250
Oh, how fascinating.
1018
00:54:55,333 --> 00:54:57,166
Oh, fascinating.
1019
00:54:58,875 --> 00:54:59,708
Yes.
1020
00:55:01,250 --> 00:55:04,708
I've always been interested
in the problems associated with aging.
1021
00:55:05,375 --> 00:55:08,875
I think our society has an almost
repulsed relationship to the aged.
1022
00:55:08,958 --> 00:55:11,750
Which is eminently foolish,
seeing that it's an inevitable and natural
1023
00:55:11,833 --> 00:55:14,000
part of the life cycle
of all living things.
1024
00:55:15,875 --> 00:55:18,000
Not to mention it's terribly unkind.
1025
00:55:19,083 --> 00:55:19,916
Oh.
1026
00:55:21,125 --> 00:55:22,333
How interesting.
1027
00:55:22,750 --> 00:55:24,083
And compassionate.
1028
00:55:24,500 --> 00:55:26,875
Oh, we've gotta keep her, Jake.
1029
00:55:26,958 --> 00:55:29,083
Oh, how kind she is.
1030
00:55:34,208 --> 00:55:35,208
Boy, it's, uh...
1031
00:55:37,125 --> 00:55:38,916
It's looking pretty bad out there.
1032
00:55:39,791 --> 00:55:42,291
I don't know, Jake,
I-I think we should probably...
1033
00:55:53,083 --> 00:55:54,083
Jake?
1034
00:55:57,833 --> 00:55:58,708
Jake?
1035
00:55:59,500 --> 00:56:01,083
- Jake?
- What?
1036
00:56:01,166 --> 00:56:02,833
I-I-I-I think we should go.
1037
00:56:02,916 --> 00:56:04,125
It's looking pretty bad.
1038
00:56:06,125 --> 00:56:07,333
I have chains!
1039
00:56:14,000 --> 00:56:14,833
Where are you?
1040
00:56:15,250 --> 00:56:16,958
- Upstairs.
- I'm coming up.
1041
00:56:19,916 --> 00:56:21,041
Just letting you know.
1042
00:56:50,250 --> 00:56:51,125
Jake?
1043
00:57:03,750 --> 00:57:04,625
Jake?
1044
00:57:06,166 --> 00:57:07,041
Where are you?
1045
00:57:13,333 --> 00:57:14,166
Jake?
1046
00:58:14,416 --> 00:58:16,375
"Coming home is terrible.
1047
00:58:16,833 --> 00:58:19,083
Whether the dogs lick your face or not.
1048
00:58:20,375 --> 00:58:24,000
Whether you have a wife or just
a wife-shaped loneliness waiting for you.
1049
00:58:25,041 --> 00:58:27,166
Coming home is terribly lonely."
1050
00:58:30,041 --> 00:58:31,583
Sorry, you...
1051
00:58:31,666 --> 00:58:32,541
you scared me.
1052
00:58:32,625 --> 00:58:34,000
Oh, I'm sorry.
1053
00:58:37,458 --> 00:58:38,291
This is...
1054
00:58:39,208 --> 00:58:41,666
Jake's childhood bedroom.
1055
00:58:43,666 --> 00:58:44,500
Yeah.
1056
00:58:45,250 --> 00:58:46,250
Yeah, I-I...
1057
00:58:46,333 --> 00:58:47,916
I saw the sign on the door.
1058
00:58:49,083 --> 00:58:50,166
Oh, that.
1059
00:58:51,875 --> 00:58:53,416
How can I explain that?
1060
00:58:53,833 --> 00:58:56,041
My memory is going, um...
1061
00:58:56,125 --> 00:58:58,500
Early signs of, uh...
1062
00:59:01,666 --> 00:59:02,666
Uh...
1063
00:59:06,250 --> 00:59:07,166
Alzheimer's?
1064
00:59:09,000 --> 00:59:09,875
Dementia?
1065
00:59:11,583 --> 00:59:13,875
- Lewy bodies...
- Yeah, I think that's it.
1066
00:59:15,333 --> 00:59:16,625
We've taken to...
1067
00:59:17,375 --> 00:59:19,250
labeling things
1068
00:59:19,666 --> 00:59:24,166
around the home,
you'll see labels all over the house.
1069
00:59:25,583 --> 00:59:26,833
I haven't noticed.
1070
00:59:30,083 --> 00:59:31,750
You will notice.
1071
00:59:32,416 --> 00:59:36,083
I'm sorry to hear that y-you're...
1072
00:59:36,166 --> 00:59:37,541
That's OK.
1073
00:59:38,875 --> 00:59:39,833
Truth is...
1074
00:59:40,583 --> 00:59:43,000
I'm looking forward
to when it gets very bad
1075
00:59:43,083 --> 00:59:45,833
and I don't have to remember
that I can't remember!
1076
00:59:50,500 --> 00:59:52,083
Seems that that'll be a...
1077
00:59:52,958 --> 00:59:55,291
better way to, um...
1078
00:59:55,958 --> 00:59:58,083
Oh, come on.
1079
01:00:01,125 --> 01:00:04,000
- Yeah.
- They say that every cloud has a...
1080
01:00:06,375 --> 01:00:09,916
- A silver...
- Silver! Ah, that's it, exactly. Silver.
1081
01:00:10,750 --> 01:00:14,291
They say that every cloud has a silver,
and, uh...
1082
01:00:14,375 --> 01:00:16,000
Well, I believe that to be true.
1083
01:00:19,875 --> 01:00:20,708
Oh.
1084
01:00:21,125 --> 01:00:22,708
This is Jake's old room.
1085
01:00:25,250 --> 01:00:27,541
You two can stay in here tonight
if you want.
1086
01:00:27,625 --> 01:00:31,500
His mother and I aren't old fashioned
about that kind of thing.
1087
01:00:31,583 --> 01:00:33,250
Fucking and whatnot.
1088
01:00:33,666 --> 01:00:35,791
Oh, I.. I... I have to get home tonight.
1089
01:00:35,875 --> 01:00:37,541
I have work in... in the morning.
1090
01:00:37,625 --> 01:00:38,875
I know this bed
1091
01:00:39,833 --> 01:00:42,166
looks a bit small for two, um...
1092
01:00:43,125 --> 01:00:43,958
Oh, come on.
1093
01:00:44,041 --> 01:00:46,083
Uh, uh, grown-ups.
1094
01:00:46,166 --> 01:00:49,833
It's a child's bed, after all.
Not even for twin children.
1095
01:00:50,208 --> 01:00:53,625
Just for one child. I'm sure
for a single night you could make do.
1096
01:00:54,041 --> 01:00:56,750
That's very generous of you, but I...
I-I do have to...
1097
01:00:56,833 --> 01:00:59,500
I imagine you won't be doing
any fucking in this bed.
1098
01:01:00,458 --> 01:01:03,250
Not really made for fucking.
It's a child's bed.
1099
01:01:03,333 --> 01:01:05,208
Just for one child, not two.
1100
01:01:05,291 --> 01:01:06,125
Right.
1101
01:01:06,208 --> 01:01:09,625
Sure I can find
one of my wife's old, um...
1102
01:01:11,208 --> 01:01:12,125
Oh.
1103
01:01:14,125 --> 01:01:16,625
Things for you to wear for tonight.
1104
01:01:16,708 --> 01:01:18,750
Might have to dig through some trunks.
1105
01:01:19,666 --> 01:01:23,500
Sure I can find one of my wife's
old things for you to wear.
1106
01:01:24,458 --> 01:01:26,125
For tonight. Oh, look, there's...
1107
01:01:26,583 --> 01:01:29,666
Jake's old room.
1108
01:01:52,958 --> 01:01:53,916
Jake.
1109
01:01:56,750 --> 01:01:59,625
Oh, it's the girlfriend.
1110
01:02:00,500 --> 01:02:01,416
Open up.
1111
01:02:02,375 --> 01:02:04,291
Jake, the snow. I need to leave.
1112
01:02:04,375 --> 01:02:09,958
I've told him over and over
it's time for him to leave!
1113
01:02:10,041 --> 01:02:11,916
Mom, you need to eat!
1114
01:02:12,000 --> 01:02:13,250
I'll be down in a minute.
1115
01:02:16,916 --> 01:02:17,750
Mom!
1116
01:02:19,125 --> 01:02:21,958
Jake's always been a good boy.
1117
01:02:22,041 --> 01:02:22,875
Mom.
1118
01:02:23,291 --> 01:02:24,583
Diligent.
1119
01:02:27,166 --> 01:02:29,000
He won a pin.
1120
01:02:29,416 --> 01:02:35,458
Maybe not as naturally talented
as some of the other students,
1121
01:02:35,541 --> 01:02:36,375
but...
1122
01:02:37,041 --> 01:02:40,375
he worked so hard.
1123
01:02:42,041 --> 01:02:44,958
And that's even more impressive.
1124
01:02:47,375 --> 01:02:48,666
Being a genus...
1125
01:02:48,750 --> 01:02:50,041
Genius, Mom.
1126
01:02:50,125 --> 01:02:51,375
Genius.
1127
01:02:53,166 --> 01:02:55,458
The luck of the draw, really.
1128
01:02:57,375 --> 01:03:00,875
The genetic lottery, as they say.
1129
01:03:02,666 --> 01:03:06,958
But to do as well as Jake did
1130
01:03:07,041 --> 01:03:12,458
with no special talent or abilities...
1131
01:03:12,833 --> 01:03:14,666
Oh.
1132
01:03:14,750 --> 01:03:18,250
That's much more impressive.
1133
01:03:19,333 --> 01:03:20,625
Mm...
1134
01:03:20,708 --> 01:03:21,666
Yes.
1135
01:03:22,208 --> 01:03:23,666
- Maybe you should...
- Soon!
1136
01:03:25,416 --> 01:03:26,250
OK.
1137
01:03:27,125 --> 01:03:30,333
We will leave soon.
1138
01:03:31,833 --> 01:03:33,416
Let me just finish up here.
1139
01:03:56,333 --> 01:03:57,208
Mom?
1140
01:03:58,333 --> 01:04:01,166
I'm impressed
with your attentiveness to your mom.
1141
01:04:01,583 --> 01:04:02,666
It's rare.
1142
01:04:03,375 --> 01:04:05,333
We tend to warehouse our elderly.
1143
01:04:08,416 --> 01:04:11,083
It's really special
how devoted a son you are.
1144
01:04:11,166 --> 01:04:14,000
I'm glad to hear you say that.
That makes me feel better.
1145
01:04:15,625 --> 01:04:17,083
Sometimes it...
1146
01:04:18,458 --> 01:04:22,166
feels like no one sees
the good things you do.
1147
01:04:24,125 --> 01:04:25,541
Like you're just alone.
1148
01:04:31,625 --> 01:04:32,791
I see it.
1149
01:04:40,083 --> 01:04:41,500
I'll wait downstairs.
1150
01:04:42,333 --> 01:04:43,500
Give you some privacy.
1151
01:04:48,875 --> 01:04:52,875
I don't want to live in a warehouse.
1152
01:04:53,416 --> 01:04:55,875
I should end this.
Just end it.
1153
01:04:56,250 --> 01:04:57,791
I just make a clean break.
1154
01:04:58,166 --> 01:05:00,750
No lingering,
no waiting for things to get better.
1155
01:05:01,375 --> 01:05:02,833
You can only wait so long.
1156
01:05:03,333 --> 01:05:05,916
I don't even know who I am
in this whole thing anymore,
1157
01:05:06,000 --> 01:05:07,875
where I stop and Jake starts.
1158
01:05:08,416 --> 01:05:12,666
I'm a pinball. My emotional state
is bouncing all over the place.
1159
01:05:12,750 --> 01:05:15,750
Jake needs to see me
as someone who sees him.
1160
01:05:15,833 --> 01:05:18,750
He needs to be seen,
and he needs to be seen with approval.
1161
01:05:19,250 --> 01:05:21,666
Like that's my purpose
in all this, in life.
1162
01:05:21,750 --> 01:05:24,250
To approve of Jake, to keep him going.
1163
01:05:24,333 --> 01:05:27,333
And he needs to see me as someone
whose approval of him is validated
1164
01:05:27,416 --> 01:05:28,958
because I'm approved of by others.
1165
01:05:29,041 --> 01:05:31,000
"Look at my girlfriend,
look at what I won.
1166
01:05:31,083 --> 01:05:33,666
She's smart, she's talented,
she's sensitive.
1167
01:05:33,750 --> 01:05:36,875
She can do this, she knows about that,
she made this, she cares about that."
1168
01:05:36,958 --> 01:05:39,666
Let me just take him to the bathroom,
then we'll go.
1169
01:05:39,750 --> 01:05:41,000
I need to end it.
1170
01:05:41,083 --> 01:05:42,041
Is that the girl?
1171
01:05:44,125 --> 01:05:46,833
- Yes, Dad, Louisa.
- Oh.
1172
01:05:46,916 --> 01:05:47,750
Good.
1173
01:05:48,250 --> 01:05:49,750
I brought your mother's, uh...
1174
01:05:54,250 --> 01:05:55,416
nightgown.
1175
01:05:56,333 --> 01:05:57,208
For her.
1176
01:05:59,208 --> 01:06:00,958
That's...
1177
01:06:01,041 --> 01:06:02,625
Very kind. I...
1178
01:06:04,708 --> 01:06:06,166
I have to go home tonight.
1179
01:06:06,958 --> 01:06:07,791
Soon.
1180
01:06:07,875 --> 01:06:11,625
Oh, I-I... I don't understand.
What does she mean?
1181
01:06:11,708 --> 01:06:13,000
I don't know, Dad.
1182
01:06:13,083 --> 01:06:15,458
- I can't tell.
- I have my shift tomorrow.
1183
01:06:16,916 --> 01:06:18,125
She's a waitress.
1184
01:06:18,208 --> 01:06:19,125
Oh
1185
01:06:20,416 --> 01:06:22,833
We.. we met when she was serving me.
1186
01:06:24,500 --> 01:06:25,833
It's a sweet story.
1187
01:06:27,791 --> 01:06:31,041
I asked her about the...
1188
01:06:31,666 --> 01:06:34,000
Santa Fe burger.
1189
01:06:36,833 --> 01:06:38,250
I'm feeling confused.
1190
01:06:38,333 --> 01:06:40,083
Let's just get you to the bathroom.
1191
01:06:41,333 --> 01:06:42,958
We don't want another accident.
1192
01:06:43,458 --> 01:06:44,500
Remember last night?
1193
01:06:44,583 --> 01:06:46,416
What's this old thing doing here?
1194
01:06:46,500 --> 01:06:47,750
I'm not sure.
1195
01:06:47,833 --> 01:06:49,000
Oh, my goodness it's filthy.
1196
01:06:49,083 --> 01:06:51,500
It's got Jake's baby food on it.
What's it doing here?
1197
01:06:51,583 --> 01:06:52,750
I tell you,
1198
01:06:52,833 --> 01:06:55,708
I would misplace my own head
if it wasn't screwed onto my own head.
1199
01:06:55,791 --> 01:06:58,666
Would you be a sweetheart and toss it
in the washer? I just started a load.
1200
01:06:58,750 --> 01:07:01,166
My hands are full picking up
all these darn toys.
1201
01:07:01,250 --> 01:07:04,375
Jake would leave his head on the floor
if it wasn't screwed onto his own head.
1202
01:07:04,458 --> 01:07:05,500
Sure.
1203
01:07:05,583 --> 01:07:07,083
- Where is it?
- In the basement.
1204
01:07:10,000 --> 01:07:11,541
I don't think Jake wants me down there.
1205
01:07:11,625 --> 01:07:13,166
Jake can be controlling.
1206
01:07:13,250 --> 01:07:15,333
You can't allow him to control you.
1207
01:07:15,708 --> 01:07:19,833
I think it's the other side of his type
of personality. This diligence thing.
1208
01:07:19,916 --> 01:07:21,500
He needs to control everything.
1209
01:07:21,583 --> 01:07:23,291
There's so many,
1210
01:07:23,375 --> 01:07:25,750
many things that make him nervous.
1211
01:07:25,833 --> 01:07:29,291
He keeps closing off more and more
of the world. It's a problem.
1212
01:07:29,750 --> 01:07:32,125
And the few people
he does have left in his life
1213
01:07:32,208 --> 01:07:33,708
need to follow all sorts of rules.
1214
01:07:33,791 --> 01:07:35,125
It really is a problem.
1215
01:07:35,208 --> 01:07:36,625
Yes, I'm probably to blame.
1216
01:07:37,875 --> 01:07:40,958
And all this guilt
causes me to feel obligated...
1217
01:07:41,500 --> 01:07:44,666
...to bend over backwards
to accommodate his every little whim.
1218
01:07:44,750 --> 01:07:46,375
It's a vicious cycle.
1219
01:07:46,916 --> 01:07:48,791
So what exactly are you saying to me?
1220
01:07:49,500 --> 01:07:53,958
I'm saying,
take the darn nightgown to the basement.
1221
01:07:55,000 --> 01:07:56,541
Live dangerously.
1222
01:08:29,958 --> 01:08:31,625
You... you sent her down?
1223
01:08:32,791 --> 01:08:33,958
To the washer.
1224
01:08:34,500 --> 01:08:36,250
Mom! Really?
1225
01:08:37,125 --> 01:08:39,791
You don't have to do laundry
for my mom.
1226
01:08:39,875 --> 01:08:41,166
You're a guest,
1227
01:08:41,958 --> 01:08:45,458
and we... we... we'll get you
a clean nightgown for tonight.
1228
01:08:45,541 --> 01:08:47,583
- I don't mind.
- Well, we really need...
1229
01:08:47,666 --> 01:08:49,250
We really need to get on the road.
1230
01:08:50,833 --> 01:08:53,000
I could... I could use some help
with the chains.
1231
01:08:53,083 --> 01:08:54,250
Right, I'll be up.
1232
01:10:19,458 --> 01:10:23,291
It's tragic how few people
possess their souls before they die.
1233
01:10:25,458 --> 01:10:28,750
"Nothing is more rare in any man,"
says Emerson,
1234
01:10:29,291 --> 01:10:30,541
"than an act of his own."
1235
01:10:31,250 --> 01:10:32,583
And it's quite true.
1236
01:10:33,000 --> 01:10:34,541
Most people are other people.
1237
01:10:35,375 --> 01:10:37,500
Their thoughts are
someone else's opinions.
1238
01:10:37,875 --> 01:10:40,666
Their lives a mimicry,
their passions a quotation.
1239
01:10:42,250 --> 01:10:43,708
That's an Oscar Wilde quote.
1240
01:10:48,500 --> 01:10:50,541
There's only one question
to resolve.
1241
01:10:50,625 --> 01:10:54,000
I'm scared. I feel a little crazy.
I'm not lucid.
1242
01:10:54,083 --> 01:10:57,041
The assumptions are right.
I can feel my fear growing.
1243
01:10:57,125 --> 01:10:58,833
Now is the time for the answer.
1244
01:10:58,916 --> 01:11:01,666
Just one question,
one question to answer.
1245
01:11:15,000 --> 01:11:15,916
Oh, my God.
1246
01:11:16,875 --> 01:11:17,875
Jake, is your mom...
1247
01:11:25,083 --> 01:11:27,458
She's...
1248
01:11:29,166 --> 01:11:30,291
She's asleep.
1249
01:11:32,125 --> 01:11:33,250
She's...
1250
01:11:34,291 --> 01:11:35,875
We should go.
1251
01:11:37,541 --> 01:11:39,041
It's getting treacherous.
1252
01:11:40,375 --> 01:11:42,083
Are you certain she's all right?
1253
01:11:42,166 --> 01:11:43,666
Out like a light.
1254
01:11:47,375 --> 01:11:48,708
It's a good time to go.
1255
01:11:50,541 --> 01:11:51,583
What about your dad?
1256
01:11:52,291 --> 01:11:53,125
He's...
1257
01:11:55,166 --> 01:11:56,958
He's puttering somewhere.
1258
01:11:59,458 --> 01:12:01,000
The disposal's out again.
1259
01:12:03,958 --> 01:12:05,291
It was great to meet you.
1260
01:12:08,208 --> 01:12:09,708
It was great to meet you too.
1261
01:12:13,708 --> 01:12:15,791
Thank you so much for your hospitality.
1262
01:12:15,875 --> 01:12:18,541
Oh, you're welcome here any time. Yes.
1263
01:12:24,625 --> 01:12:26,416
Jake's a good boy, yes?
1264
01:12:27,833 --> 01:12:28,916
- Yes.
- Yeah?
1265
01:12:29,416 --> 01:12:31,208
A good man, I should say.
1266
01:12:32,333 --> 01:12:33,208
You agree?
1267
01:12:33,708 --> 01:12:34,666
Yes.
1268
01:12:39,375 --> 01:12:40,458
OK then, well...
1269
01:13:15,458 --> 01:13:16,291
So?
1270
01:13:17,833 --> 01:13:19,291
Did you like them?
1271
01:13:20,208 --> 01:13:22,625
Uh, y-yes, they're very nice.
1272
01:13:24,041 --> 01:13:25,041
Really?
1273
01:13:25,125 --> 01:13:25,958
Yes.
1274
01:13:28,208 --> 01:13:31,500
They can be a little pushy,
but they're basically decent people.
1275
01:13:31,916 --> 01:13:33,250
That was eminently clear.
1276
01:13:35,791 --> 01:13:37,416
They both loved you, by the way.
1277
01:13:38,083 --> 01:13:39,333
That's good. I'm glad.
1278
01:13:41,541 --> 01:13:44,500
- So smart, my mother said.
- Did she?
1279
01:13:45,041 --> 01:13:47,958
Well, not to you. That would've
made you uncomfortable.
1280
01:13:48,833 --> 01:13:51,333
But, um, when I was helping her
with the dishes.
1281
01:13:52,041 --> 01:13:55,166
I don't remember Jake
helping his mother with the dishes.
1282
01:13:55,833 --> 01:13:58,833
I feel uncertain about a lot
of what happened tonight. It felt like...
1283
01:13:58,916 --> 01:14:01,291
When you and Dad were discussing...
1284
01:14:01,375 --> 01:14:02,250
What?
1285
01:14:03,250 --> 01:14:05,208
When you and Dad were discussing...
1286
01:14:05,291 --> 01:14:07,416
It seemed
as if everything was slightly...
1287
01:14:07,875 --> 01:14:10,333
- Tariffs.
- Right. Tariffs.
1288
01:14:13,166 --> 01:14:16,000
Yeah, I-I do remember now.
I'm a little fuzzy.
1289
01:14:16,083 --> 01:14:17,458
You did have a lot of wine.
1290
01:14:19,416 --> 01:14:21,541
He was thrilled to have someone
who knew the difference.
1291
01:14:21,625 --> 01:14:22,458
Did I?
1292
01:14:22,791 --> 01:14:23,666
You did.
1293
01:14:24,666 --> 01:14:25,500
Uh...
1294
01:14:26,041 --> 01:14:28,958
I don't think you noticed,
because he kept topping you off.
1295
01:14:29,041 --> 01:14:30,958
- Did he?
- Yes, yes, yes.
1296
01:14:31,041 --> 01:14:32,041
Right.
1297
01:14:33,000 --> 01:14:34,125
I didn't notice that.
1298
01:14:34,750 --> 01:14:36,125
- Yeah.
- Tricky.
1299
01:14:36,208 --> 01:14:37,666
Makes it hard to keep count.
1300
01:14:39,000 --> 01:14:41,250
- It does.
- As I was saying...
1301
01:14:42,458 --> 01:14:44,916
All in all, I think everything...
1302
01:14:45,000 --> 01:14:46,666
...went well.
1303
01:14:46,750 --> 01:14:48,666
I think it was a successful visit.
1304
01:14:48,750 --> 01:14:49,875
Mm-hmm. Yes.
1305
01:14:51,166 --> 01:14:52,791
Everyone got to know each other.
1306
01:14:52,875 --> 01:14:55,166
That's true. They're very nice.
1307
01:14:55,250 --> 01:14:56,750
- You liked them?
- Yes.
1308
01:14:56,833 --> 01:14:59,125
They liked you, too.
I think that...
1309
01:14:59,208 --> 01:15:00,916
I think that's a good sign.
1310
01:15:01,875 --> 01:15:02,708
S-Sign?
1311
01:15:02,791 --> 01:15:03,625
Sign.
1312
01:15:04,250 --> 01:15:06,416
Sign is perhaps not the right word.
1313
01:15:06,500 --> 01:15:08,500
- The thing.
- Oh.
1314
01:15:08,583 --> 01:15:09,833
The good thing.
1315
01:15:09,916 --> 01:15:11,500
- Yeah.
- Good thing.
1316
01:15:12,750 --> 01:15:15,125
It's good when people you like,
like each other.
1317
01:15:18,125 --> 01:15:19,958
People like to think of themselves
1318
01:15:20,041 --> 01:15:21,875
as points moving through time.
1319
01:15:22,791 --> 01:15:24,750
But I think it's probably the opposite.
1320
01:15:25,625 --> 01:15:26,958
We're stationary,
1321
01:15:27,333 --> 01:15:29,208
and time passes through us,
1322
01:15:29,916 --> 01:15:31,500
blowing like cold wind,
1323
01:15:32,583 --> 01:15:33,833
stealing our heat,
1324
01:15:33,916 --> 01:15:36,291
- leaving us chapped and frozen.
- What are you thinking?
1325
01:15:36,375 --> 01:15:38,875
I don't know, dead.
1326
01:15:40,208 --> 01:15:42,458
I feel like I was that wind tonight.
1327
01:15:43,166 --> 01:15:45,000
Blowing through Jake's parents.
1328
01:15:45,666 --> 01:15:48,416
Seeing them as they were,
seeing them as they will be.
1329
01:15:48,833 --> 01:15:50,916
- Seeing them after they're gone.
- What are you...
1330
01:15:51,000 --> 01:15:53,458
- When only I'm left.
- What are you thinking?
1331
01:15:53,541 --> 01:15:54,750
Only the wind.
1332
01:15:54,833 --> 01:15:55,958
Not much.
1333
01:15:59,333 --> 01:16:00,166
Really?
1334
01:16:00,250 --> 01:16:02,625
I'm tired, Jake. The wine, I guess.
1335
01:16:02,708 --> 01:16:03,833
Yes, you did have a lot.
1336
01:16:03,916 --> 01:16:04,833
Yes.
1337
01:16:05,375 --> 01:16:07,208
It is a depressant, as you know.
1338
01:16:07,291 --> 01:16:08,125
Of course I know.
1339
01:16:08,208 --> 01:16:11,666
I think it's important for people
to keep that in mind
1340
01:16:11,750 --> 01:16:14,125
before they make decisions
under its influence.
1341
01:16:24,541 --> 01:16:27,583
- A Woman Under the Influence.
- Amazing film.
1342
01:16:29,500 --> 01:16:30,958
I'm not sure I agree.
1343
01:16:34,000 --> 01:16:38,291
I've been watching that film over and over
for my essay due Wednesday.
1344
01:16:42,166 --> 01:16:44,375
I felt, uh, a kinship
1345
01:16:45,208 --> 01:16:46,625
with Mabel, I guess.
1346
01:16:47,250 --> 01:16:51,541
She's such a powerful,
horribly wronged character.
1347
01:16:51,625 --> 01:16:52,458
Is she?
1348
01:16:55,000 --> 01:16:55,875
I think...
1349
01:17:02,666 --> 01:17:04,333
Mabel Longhetti is bombed out
1350
01:17:04,416 --> 01:17:06,750
because she's always trying
to please everyone,
1351
01:17:08,166 --> 01:17:12,500
so that she can be considered one more
victim-heroine for the women's liberation.
1352
01:17:12,833 --> 01:17:15,500
But only by women liberationists
1353
01:17:15,583 --> 01:17:18,208
who are willing to accept
textbook spin-offs as art.
1354
01:17:18,291 --> 01:17:20,416
The Junoesque Gena Rowlands,
1355
01:17:20,500 --> 01:17:24,500
Mrs. Cassavetes, is a prodigious actress,
and she never lets go of the character.
1356
01:17:24,583 --> 01:17:27,458
I agree. I-I thought she was
great in the role.
1357
01:17:29,458 --> 01:17:32,916
- Seemed to me she... she encompassed...
- Now at an indeterminate age
1358
01:17:33,000 --> 01:17:35,250
when her beauty has deepened
beyond ingenue roles,
1359
01:17:35,333 --> 01:17:36,958
Rowlands can look old or young.
1360
01:17:37,041 --> 01:17:40,666
Shades of expression
transform Mabel Longhetti from...
1361
01:17:41,041 --> 01:17:43,625
a radiantly flirtatious beauty
1362
01:17:43,708 --> 01:17:45,958
into a sad, sagging neighborhood drunk.
1363
01:17:46,041 --> 01:17:49,250
Rowlands externalizes
schizophrenic dissolution.
1364
01:17:50,250 --> 01:17:52,625
Mabel fragments before your eyes.
1365
01:17:52,708 --> 01:17:55,500
A three-ring circus
might be taking place in her face.
1366
01:17:56,250 --> 01:17:59,500
Rowland's performance is enough
for half a dozen tours de force,
1367
01:17:59,583 --> 01:18:01,916
a whole row of Oscars. It's exhausting.
1368
01:18:02,000 --> 01:18:04,125
Conceivably,
she is a great actress, but...
1369
01:18:04,208 --> 01:18:07,291
nothing she does is memorable,
because she does so much.
1370
01:18:16,583 --> 01:18:19,875
It's the most transient
big performance I've ever seen.
1371
01:18:19,958 --> 01:18:23,250
I guess I'm unclear
what you mean by transient?
1372
01:18:26,666 --> 01:18:28,625
Mabel tries to slash her wrist,
1373
01:18:28,708 --> 01:18:30,375
Nick puts a band-aid on the cut.
1374
01:18:30,458 --> 01:18:32,625
The idiot symbolism is enough
to make you want to hoot,
1375
01:18:32,708 --> 01:18:34,458
but this two-hour and 35-minute movie
1376
01:18:34,541 --> 01:18:36,791
leaves you too groggy
to do more than moan.
1377
01:18:36,875 --> 01:18:40,625
Details that are meant to establish
the pathological nature
1378
01:18:40,708 --> 01:18:42,708
of the characters surrounding Mabel...
1379
01:18:42,791 --> 01:18:47,791
...and so show her isolation
become instead limp, false moments.
1380
01:18:48,208 --> 01:18:50,208
It's unclear whether the characters
are unconscious
1381
01:18:50,291 --> 01:18:53,666
or whether it's Cassavetes
who's unconscious of what he's doing.
1382
01:18:54,041 --> 01:18:56,375
The children keep murmuring
that they love her.
1383
01:18:56,833 --> 01:18:59,208
There's no clue
as how to decipher that refrain.
1384
01:18:59,583 --> 01:19:01,625
Are they coddling her?
1385
01:19:02,041 --> 01:19:05,541
Reversing roles and treating her
like a child in need of reassurance?
1386
01:19:05,625 --> 01:19:08,416
Or are they as unashamedly loving
as she is?
1387
01:19:08,500 --> 01:19:10,416
And what are... what are we to make
1388
01:19:10,500 --> 01:19:12,625
of Nick the Pulper's
constant assertations?
1389
01:19:12,708 --> 01:19:14,250
Is assertations even a word?
1390
01:19:14,333 --> 01:19:18,000
- I thought it was assertions.
- They're both words. Look it up.
1391
01:19:19,125 --> 01:19:22,208
What are we to make of Nick the Pulper's
constant assertations of love?
1392
01:19:22,291 --> 01:19:24,625
The... the movie is entirely tendentious.
1393
01:19:24,708 --> 01:19:27,291
It's all planned yet it isn't thought out.
1394
01:19:36,541 --> 01:19:38,291
I do see what you're saying.
1395
01:19:41,666 --> 01:19:46,583
You are certainly the expert
on things cinematic.
1396
01:19:46,666 --> 01:19:47,500
Yeah.
1397
01:19:49,000 --> 01:19:49,833
I am.
1398
01:19:53,541 --> 01:19:55,208
I-I guess I was just...
1399
01:19:56,333 --> 01:19:57,208
Taken in...
1400
01:19:57,875 --> 01:20:02,916
by the... the sympathy
that Cassavetes showed for her.
1401
01:20:03,625 --> 01:20:07,583
I feel like maybe our society
lacks a certain kindness,
1402
01:20:08,250 --> 01:20:14,625
a certain willingness
to take in the struggles of others...
1403
01:20:14,708 --> 01:20:19,708
...struggling with, uh,
issues caused by...
1404
01:20:19,791 --> 01:20:21,625
An alienating society?
1405
01:20:22,750 --> 01:20:23,791
I don't know.
1406
01:20:24,666 --> 01:20:26,041
Uh, I guess.
1407
01:20:26,458 --> 01:20:28,083
Yeah. It seems hopeless.
1408
01:20:31,208 --> 01:20:32,125
What does?
1409
01:20:34,875 --> 01:20:37,041
All of it. Uh, everything.
1410
01:20:37,125 --> 01:20:38,583
Like feeling old,
1411
01:20:38,666 --> 01:20:42,541
like your body is going,
your hearing, your sight.
1412
01:20:43,833 --> 01:20:46,666
You can't see, and you're invisible.
1413
01:20:48,083 --> 01:20:51,708
And you've made so many wrong turns.
1414
01:20:53,875 --> 01:20:54,833
The lie of it all.
1415
01:20:54,916 --> 01:20:57,375
- What is the lie of it all?
- I don't know! That...
1416
01:20:58,000 --> 01:21:00,166
it's going to get better,
that it's never too late,
1417
01:21:00,250 --> 01:21:01,458
that...
1418
01:21:01,541 --> 01:21:02,958
God has a plan for you.
1419
01:21:03,041 --> 01:21:05,333
- That age is just a number.
- Shut up.
1420
01:21:05,416 --> 01:21:06,250
That...
1421
01:21:07,375 --> 01:21:09,833
It's always darkest
before the dawn. That…
1422
01:21:11,041 --> 01:21:14,083
Every cloud has a fucking silver lining!
1423
01:21:17,125 --> 01:21:18,041
That there's...
1424
01:21:19,625 --> 01:21:21,958
That there's someone for everyone.
1425
01:21:22,291 --> 01:21:23,583
Platitudes all.
1426
01:21:27,041 --> 01:21:30,041
Shut up, Mabel! Sit down, Mabel!
1427
01:21:38,000 --> 01:21:40,291
And God never gives us
more than we can bear.
1428
01:21:40,958 --> 01:21:42,416
God's a good egg that way.
1429
01:21:45,333 --> 01:21:47,000
Hey, do you want something sweet?
1430
01:21:47,375 --> 01:21:48,291
What do you mean?
1431
01:21:48,375 --> 01:21:51,375
- Dessert.
- Didn't we have dessert at your mom's?
1432
01:21:51,458 --> 01:21:54,541
I feel like there was
this huge cake thing, or...
1433
01:21:56,000 --> 01:21:56,833
True.
1434
01:21:56,916 --> 01:21:59,166
I guess I'm a sugar junkie!
1435
01:22:00,500 --> 01:22:01,333
I don't know.
1436
01:22:04,833 --> 01:22:07,250
It might help me stay awake.
1437
01:22:07,333 --> 01:22:09,125
Then definitely!
1438
01:22:10,250 --> 01:22:13,041
We need Jake awake for a bit.
This is all so treacherous.
1439
01:22:13,458 --> 01:22:16,500
There's a Tulsey Town
just at the turn-off up ahead.
1440
01:22:16,833 --> 01:22:18,041
A Tulsey Town?
1441
01:22:19,541 --> 01:22:22,166
Open now? In this? It's freezing.
1442
01:22:22,625 --> 01:22:26,791
It is perfect weather for a Brrr.
1443
01:22:28,208 --> 01:22:29,333
Don't you think?
1444
01:22:29,416 --> 01:22:30,541
Yeah, I guess it is.
1445
01:22:40,833 --> 01:22:42,083
Tulsey Town.
1446
01:22:42,625 --> 01:22:43,666
Huh.
1447
01:22:45,125 --> 01:22:47,583
Jesus, I never thought of that before.
1448
01:22:50,041 --> 01:22:52,125
What do you suppose Tulsey Town is?
1449
01:22:52,208 --> 01:22:53,333
Based on the clown...
1450
01:22:54,666 --> 01:22:56,541
I'd say it's a circus town.
1451
01:22:57,250 --> 01:22:59,000
Maybe like that place...
1452
01:23:00,208 --> 01:23:03,791
uh, where the sideshow folks go
during off season.
1453
01:23:03,875 --> 01:23:06,166
- Ruled by the clown lady?
- Ah.
1454
01:23:06,541 --> 01:23:08,500
Well, yes, she wears a crown.
1455
01:23:08,583 --> 01:23:09,500
She has a...
1456
01:23:10,041 --> 01:23:11,791
clown crown?
1457
01:23:11,875 --> 01:23:16,833
A benevolent and tolerant
ice cream clown queen.
1458
01:23:16,916 --> 01:23:19,208
Made entirely of lactose.
1459
01:23:19,291 --> 01:23:21,458
She is lactose tolerant!
1460
01:23:21,541 --> 01:23:23,208
She's sweet but cold.
1461
01:23:23,291 --> 01:23:24,583
Like your mum.
1462
01:23:29,958 --> 01:23:30,791
What do you mean?
1463
01:23:30,875 --> 01:23:33,125
Nothing. I don't know why I said that.
That just came out.
1464
01:23:33,208 --> 01:23:35,458
- Did you think of my mother as cold?
- No.
1465
01:23:35,541 --> 01:23:38,208
Uh, she was lovely, she really was.
1466
01:23:38,291 --> 01:23:39,166
'Cause I don't...
1467
01:23:39,750 --> 01:23:41,083
subscribe to that,
1468
01:23:41,166 --> 01:23:44,666
the mother is the cause
of all psychological problems crap.
1469
01:23:44,750 --> 01:23:48,125
That's misogynistic claptrap.
Freudian bullshit.
1470
01:23:48,208 --> 01:23:49,416
It is tempting...
1471
01:23:50,166 --> 01:23:52,708
to have someone to pin it on, though.
1472
01:23:52,791 --> 01:23:53,750
Pin what on?
1473
01:23:55,208 --> 01:23:59,250
All of it. Why you feel a certain way,
why you are a certain way.
1474
01:24:01,166 --> 01:24:04,208
That's misogynistic claptrap.
Freudian bullshit.
1475
01:24:05,125 --> 01:24:08,125
A person, an adult, has to,
at one point or another,
1476
01:24:08,583 --> 01:24:11,333
take responsibility for who they are.
1477
01:24:13,625 --> 01:24:14,500
Don't you think?
1478
01:24:15,416 --> 01:24:16,250
- Yeah.
- Yes.
1479
01:24:16,333 --> 01:24:18,375
Mother's are people
with their own pain,
1480
01:24:18,458 --> 01:24:20,666
their own history of neglect and abuse.
1481
01:24:21,625 --> 01:24:23,708
Yet, at one time or another,
1482
01:24:23,791 --> 01:24:27,458
during the 20th century, every fucking
childhood trait was blamed on them:
1483
01:24:27,541 --> 01:24:30,666
schizophrenia, autism,
narcissism, homosexuality.
1484
01:24:30,750 --> 01:24:34,750
Not that homosexuality is akin
to any of those other things.
1485
01:24:34,833 --> 01:24:36,958
- Uh, yeah. Of course not.
- Obviously.
1486
01:24:37,041 --> 01:24:39,791
Saying that a mother is to blame
for her child's homosexuality
1487
01:24:39,875 --> 01:24:42,916
is to imply that homosexuality
is somehow negative.
1488
01:24:43,000 --> 01:24:47,916
I was just saying that when homosexuality
was considered a pathology
1489
01:24:48,000 --> 01:24:50,583
in the DSM before 1973,
1490
01:24:51,250 --> 01:24:53,416
a coddling mother
1491
01:24:54,916 --> 01:24:57,166
- was often seen as the culprit.
- Right.
1492
01:25:01,166 --> 01:25:05,958
It's despicable how we label people
and categorize them and dismiss them.
1493
01:25:06,916 --> 01:25:09,208
I look at the kids
1494
01:25:09,291 --> 01:25:11,625
I see at school every day.
1495
01:25:13,416 --> 01:25:15,791
I see the ones who are ostracized.
They're...
1496
01:25:16,416 --> 01:25:18,166
different. They're out of step.
1497
01:25:18,250 --> 01:25:21,166
And I see the lives they'll have
because of that.
1498
01:25:21,500 --> 01:25:26,625
Sometimes I see them years later,
in town, at the supermarket.
1499
01:25:32,291 --> 01:25:34,708
I see,
1500
01:25:34,791 --> 01:25:38,208
I can tell that they still carry
that stuff around with them.
1501
01:25:39,333 --> 01:25:40,250
Like a...
1502
01:25:41,208 --> 01:25:42,916
black aura.
1503
01:25:44,583 --> 01:25:46,250
Like a millstone.
1504
01:25:48,625 --> 01:25:50,208
Like an oozing wound.
1505
01:25:52,875 --> 01:25:53,708
Jake.
1506
01:25:55,166 --> 01:25:57,000
- I'm thinking...
- Here! Ta-da!
1507
01:26:00,708 --> 01:26:02,791
Oh. Man, that's brutal.
1508
01:26:04,083 --> 01:26:06,500
Brutal place, the land of Tulsey Town.
1509
01:26:09,916 --> 01:26:11,208
Climate change here too.
1510
01:26:11,708 --> 01:26:12,833
Have you read the novel Ice?
1511
01:26:12,916 --> 01:26:15,458
- I don't think so.
- By Anna Kavan?
1512
01:26:15,541 --> 01:26:16,416
I don't think so.
1513
01:26:17,166 --> 01:26:20,166
1967, it's a fable of sorts,
about...
1514
01:26:20,250 --> 01:26:22,250
Let's just get the ice cream and go,
it's freezing.
1515
01:26:22,333 --> 01:26:25,041
Wait a minute.
I just want to see who's on tonight first.
1516
01:26:25,125 --> 01:26:26,958
You know the people
who work here?
1517
01:26:27,541 --> 01:26:28,458
Some of them.
1518
01:26:29,250 --> 01:26:32,458
Well, I stop sometimes
after visiting my parents.
1519
01:26:32,833 --> 01:26:35,916
I don't like some of the girls
that work here, so I just wanna make sure.
1520
01:26:36,000 --> 01:26:38,875
- What's wrong with them?
- I don't know. People...
1521
01:26:39,458 --> 01:26:40,708
can be cold to me.
1522
01:26:40,791 --> 01:26:43,208
- Uh, I'm gonna wait in the car.
- No, no! Say hello.
1523
01:26:43,291 --> 01:26:45,750
They won't come if they know it's me.
1524
01:26:53,166 --> 01:26:55,375
- Hello, anybody here?
- In a minute!
1525
01:26:55,458 --> 01:26:57,666
So, Ice takes place...
1526
01:26:57,750 --> 01:26:58,708
during, uh...
1527
01:26:59,125 --> 01:27:01,833
an environmental cataclysm,
causing the world to become
1528
01:27:01,916 --> 01:27:04,541
a frozen wasteland.
1529
01:27:04,625 --> 01:27:05,541
And the main...
1530
01:27:06,875 --> 01:27:07,916
Hi!
1531
01:27:09,375 --> 01:27:10,250
Hi.
1532
01:27:16,000 --> 01:27:17,083
Can I help you, sir?
1533
01:27:22,625 --> 01:27:23,458
Uh...
1534
01:27:25,625 --> 01:27:27,625
So, yeah, uh, I'll have, uh...
1535
01:27:28,041 --> 01:27:29,083
Oreo Brr.
1536
01:27:29,166 --> 01:27:30,333
And he'll have...
1537
01:27:31,583 --> 01:27:32,458
Same.
1538
01:27:32,541 --> 01:27:33,916
Uh, two of those, please.
1539
01:27:35,708 --> 01:27:36,833
Two "sames."
1540
01:27:42,125 --> 01:27:44,458
Uh, sorry, uh, we need to get back
on the road.
1541
01:27:44,541 --> 01:27:47,666
So can we get them as quick
as... as... as possible?
1542
01:27:50,291 --> 01:27:52,041
Uh, sorry, hi.
1543
01:27:52,125 --> 01:27:55,000
Sorry about the smell, they're doing some
varnishing in the back.
1544
01:27:55,791 --> 01:27:56,625
Varnishing?
1545
01:27:57,833 --> 01:27:58,708
Shelves.
1546
01:27:59,416 --> 01:28:00,958
Oh. No problem.
1547
01:28:03,708 --> 01:28:05,833
I know this girl.
I've seen her somewhere.
1548
01:28:05,916 --> 01:28:07,916
I've seen her before, her... her face.
1549
01:28:08,000 --> 01:28:10,625
Her rash, I know her.
It's on the tip of my tongue.
1550
01:28:10,708 --> 01:28:12,833
Tip of my brain, as Jake says.
1551
01:28:12,916 --> 01:28:14,666
She's someone. She's from somewhere.
1552
01:28:15,291 --> 01:28:16,375
I'm certain of it.
1553
01:28:18,791 --> 01:28:20,500
It's a fucking blizzard out there.
1554
01:28:21,458 --> 01:28:23,166
Surprised you were open
on a night like this.
1555
01:28:23,250 --> 01:28:25,791
It's a fucking blizzard out there,
fucking Brrr in here.
1556
01:28:26,125 --> 01:28:27,250
Yeah, I-I...
1557
01:28:27,333 --> 01:28:29,166
I was thinking the exact same thing.
1558
01:28:32,500 --> 01:28:33,500
You're kind.
1559
01:28:33,583 --> 01:28:35,541
You're not like them.
1560
01:28:36,291 --> 01:28:39,458
Vapid and mean and pretty.
1561
01:28:40,875 --> 01:28:41,708
Thanks a lot.
1562
01:28:42,833 --> 01:28:44,208
I didn't mean it like that.
1563
01:28:46,125 --> 01:28:47,333
I love the way you look.
1564
01:28:47,416 --> 01:28:50,166
You... you have a kindness,
and of course you're very attractive.
1565
01:28:50,250 --> 01:28:52,916
- I didn't mean it like that.
- It's OK. I understand.
1566
01:28:54,000 --> 01:28:54,833
It's, uh...
1567
01:28:55,541 --> 01:28:56,750
It's just, there seem...
1568
01:28:57,250 --> 01:28:58,166
seems to be a...
1569
01:28:58,708 --> 01:29:02,041
certain hardness that comes
with a certain kind of pretty.
1570
01:29:02,125 --> 01:29:03,000
You don't have that.
1571
01:29:03,541 --> 01:29:06,625
Maybe they suffer too, the pretty ones.
I don't know, maybe...
1572
01:29:07,375 --> 01:29:09,666
maybe their prettiness
causes them suffering.
1573
01:29:10,791 --> 01:29:12,166
I'm not a psychiatrist.
1574
01:29:12,666 --> 01:29:16,458
What an odd thing to say.
Of course she's not a psychiatrist.
1575
01:29:16,541 --> 01:29:18,083
She can't be more than 15.
1576
01:29:18,166 --> 01:29:20,333
Made them extra high,
since you're so nice.
1577
01:29:21,000 --> 01:29:21,875
Thanks.
1578
01:29:22,375 --> 01:29:24,083
It'll be eight dollars, please?
1579
01:29:24,791 --> 01:29:25,791
Jake?
1580
01:29:36,291 --> 01:29:37,125
Keep the change.
1581
01:29:38,291 --> 01:29:40,291
- Thank you.
- You're welcome. Thanks.
1582
01:29:40,375 --> 01:29:41,208
I'm worried.
1583
01:29:43,500 --> 01:29:44,333
Excuse me?
1584
01:29:44,750 --> 01:29:46,083
I shouldn't be saying this.
1585
01:29:46,166 --> 01:29:48,416
You OK? Do you need me to call for help?
1586
01:29:48,500 --> 01:29:49,833
It's not varnish.
1587
01:29:51,750 --> 01:29:53,750
That's not why it smells.
You should know that.
1588
01:29:53,833 --> 01:29:54,666
What do you mean?
1589
01:29:55,208 --> 01:29:57,458
- You don't have to go.
- I don't have to go where?
1590
01:29:57,916 --> 01:30:00,333
Forward, in time. You...
1591
01:30:01,458 --> 01:30:02,541
you can stay here.
1592
01:30:05,083 --> 01:30:06,083
I'm very scared.
1593
01:30:06,166 --> 01:30:08,041
About what? What are you scared about?
1594
01:30:08,125 --> 01:30:10,000
- I'm scared for you.
- Thank you.
1595
01:30:12,375 --> 01:30:14,708
Have a good night. Be careful.
The roads are treacherous.
1596
01:30:40,750 --> 01:30:42,458
You notice that girl's arms?
1597
01:30:42,541 --> 01:30:44,583
- Which girl?
- In the Tulsey Town.
1598
01:30:45,916 --> 01:30:48,416
Which girl? There were... several.
1599
01:30:48,500 --> 01:30:50,541
Several? There were three.
1600
01:30:50,625 --> 01:30:52,791
Several is anything more than two.
1601
01:30:52,875 --> 01:30:53,750
Really?
1602
01:30:53,833 --> 01:30:55,250
Mm-hmm. Look it up.
1603
01:30:55,333 --> 01:30:57,375
Look it up?
Can you stop saying that?
1604
01:30:59,166 --> 01:31:02,125
Anyway, the one... the one with the rash
all over her arms.
1605
01:31:02,208 --> 01:31:03,416
I didn't notice.
1606
01:31:03,500 --> 01:31:05,000
You're being willfully obtuse.
1607
01:31:06,958 --> 01:31:08,250
Not my intention.
1608
01:31:08,333 --> 01:31:09,958
"Not my intention."
1609
01:31:11,541 --> 01:31:12,375
Anyway.
1610
01:31:17,916 --> 01:31:19,666
How's the Brrr?
1611
01:31:20,208 --> 01:31:21,833
- Too sweet?
- Yeah, it's sweet.
1612
01:31:21,916 --> 01:31:23,833
I always forget how sweet these are.
1613
01:31:23,916 --> 01:31:26,125
A little goes a long way.
1614
01:31:27,500 --> 01:31:29,500
I don't think I can eat anymore of mine.
1615
01:31:29,958 --> 01:31:31,166
You barely touched it.
1616
01:31:32,333 --> 01:31:34,625
It's very sweet.
1617
01:31:35,625 --> 01:31:36,458
Yeah.
1618
01:31:37,375 --> 01:31:38,291
It is a lot.
1619
01:31:42,625 --> 01:31:45,250
- Cold?
- Yeah. The ice cream, I guess.
1620
01:31:48,666 --> 01:31:51,000
We're in the middle of a snow storm.
1621
01:31:52,291 --> 01:31:55,833
Whose idea was it to go to Tulsey Town
in the middle of all this, anyway?
1622
01:31:55,916 --> 01:31:58,125
I am not saying a word.
1623
01:32:03,333 --> 01:32:04,500
How odd.
1624
01:32:05,041 --> 01:32:08,166
This is probably the last time
I'll ever be in a car with Jake.
1625
01:32:08,750 --> 01:32:10,708
Soon this'll all be a distant memory.
1626
01:32:11,500 --> 01:32:13,958
We'll both be in different places,
1627
01:32:14,041 --> 01:32:15,458
remembering this moment.
1628
01:32:16,333 --> 01:32:17,625
This shared laugh.
1629
01:32:18,125 --> 01:32:19,708
And maybe there'll be regret.
1630
01:32:23,750 --> 01:32:26,166
Maybe time will soften
the harder edges, and...
1631
01:32:26,791 --> 01:32:29,958
we'll both think that was sort of nice.
1632
01:32:31,625 --> 01:32:34,708
Why did it have to end?
And there's no way back at that point.
1633
01:32:35,666 --> 01:32:37,833
There's never a way back.
1634
01:32:37,916 --> 01:32:41,125
- You got quiet all of a sudden.
- Just watching the storm.
1635
01:32:42,291 --> 01:32:45,458
If you can't even tell the other person
what you're thinking,
1636
01:32:45,541 --> 01:32:48,000
- that doesn't bode well.
- Looks like you're done with it.
1637
01:32:49,125 --> 01:32:49,958
What do you mean?
1638
01:32:54,041 --> 01:32:56,291
Bit of a wasted stop.
1639
01:32:56,375 --> 01:33:00,000
At least I can say I've been
to Tulsey Town in the middle of the night,
1640
01:33:00,083 --> 01:33:02,791
in the middle of nowhere,
in the middle of a snowstorm.
1641
01:33:34,875 --> 01:33:37,041
That's something I'll never do again.
1642
01:33:37,125 --> 01:33:39,375
A supposedly fun thing
you'll never do again.
1643
01:33:39,458 --> 01:33:41,416
- Yes.
- Have you... have you read that?
1644
01:33:41,500 --> 01:33:42,375
Read what?
1645
01:33:43,541 --> 01:33:45,916
It's a book of essays
by David Foster Wallace.
1646
01:33:47,416 --> 01:33:48,875
Nope. I have not.
1647
01:33:50,791 --> 01:33:52,791
It's a book... a book of essays.
1648
01:33:52,875 --> 01:33:54,541
Ah. No, I haven't read it.
1649
01:33:58,000 --> 01:34:00,583
We should... we should find some place
to dump these.
1650
01:34:00,666 --> 01:34:04,083
They're going to melt
and get the cup holders all sticky.
1651
01:34:04,166 --> 01:34:05,083
Hmm.
1652
01:34:05,541 --> 01:34:06,375
OK.
1653
01:34:08,916 --> 01:34:09,750
Hmm.
1654
01:34:10,791 --> 01:34:13,500
He's got this essay in it
about television.
1655
01:34:14,958 --> 01:34:16,708
Pretty people tend to appeal...
1656
01:34:21,083 --> 01:34:25,000
Pretty people tend to be
more pleasing to look at
1657
01:34:25,708 --> 01:34:27,041
than non-pretty people.
1658
01:34:27,125 --> 01:34:28,916
But when we're talking about television,
1659
01:34:29,000 --> 01:34:32,625
the combination of sheer audience size
and quiet psychic intercourse
1660
01:34:32,708 --> 01:34:34,208
between images and oglers
1661
01:34:34,291 --> 01:34:37,750
starts a cycle that both enhances
pretty images' appeal
1662
01:34:37,833 --> 01:34:40,833
and erodes us viewers'
own sense of security
1663
01:34:40,916 --> 01:34:42,833
in the face of gazes.
1664
01:34:44,750 --> 01:34:47,333
That... that's from the essay.
1665
01:34:48,416 --> 01:34:49,250
That's...
1666
01:34:49,583 --> 01:34:50,625
that's interesting.
1667
01:34:51,291 --> 01:34:52,125
He killed himself.
1668
01:34:52,916 --> 01:34:55,000
Yeah. Yeah, I-I think I knew that.
1669
01:34:55,083 --> 01:34:56,708
Yeah, everybody knows it.
1670
01:34:56,791 --> 01:35:00,250
Even people who know nothing else
about David Foster Wallace,
1671
01:35:00,333 --> 01:35:02,000
never read a word of his writing.
1672
01:35:02,916 --> 01:35:05,666
Suicide becomes the story.
1673
01:35:06,708 --> 01:35:07,833
The mythology.
1674
01:35:08,916 --> 01:35:12,000
The cautionary tale. It's obnoxious.
1675
01:35:13,458 --> 01:35:14,750
It's obnoxious.
1676
01:35:15,375 --> 01:35:18,583
I don't think we know how
to be human anymore.
1677
01:35:19,291 --> 01:35:20,125
Who doesn't?
1678
01:35:20,208 --> 01:35:23,333
Our society, our culture, people.
1679
01:35:24,666 --> 01:35:27,333
Whatever all this is.
1680
01:35:28,291 --> 01:35:29,250
Any of us.
1681
01:35:32,041 --> 01:35:34,708
Well, have you ever read
any Guy Debord?
1682
01:35:37,166 --> 01:35:39,875
- The Society of the Spectacle?
- Exactly. Yes.
1683
01:35:40,375 --> 01:35:41,750
Yes. Of course.
1684
01:35:42,625 --> 01:35:43,750
Debord says...
1685
01:35:44,958 --> 01:35:48,250
"The spectacle cannot be understood
as a mere visual deception
1686
01:35:48,666 --> 01:35:50,791
produced by mass media technologies.
1687
01:35:52,166 --> 01:35:54,250
It is a worldview
that has actually been materialized."
1688
01:35:54,333 --> 01:35:57,708
Watch the world through this glass,
1689
01:35:58,250 --> 01:35:59,875
pre-interpreted for us.
1690
01:35:59,958 --> 01:36:03,000
And it infects our brains. We become it.
1691
01:36:03,833 --> 01:36:05,125
Like a virus.
1692
01:36:13,208 --> 01:36:17,666
Listen, these... these melting things
are... are driving me crazy.
1693
01:36:17,750 --> 01:36:20,583
They're going to get
everything all sticky.
1694
01:36:20,666 --> 01:36:23,208
Well, have you got a plastic bag
or something?
1695
01:36:23,291 --> 01:36:25,208
- No, no, nothing like that.
- A napkin maybe?
1696
01:36:25,291 --> 01:36:27,333
I want to find a place to dump them.
1697
01:36:27,875 --> 01:36:30,291
Well, there doesn't seem
to be anything around here.
1698
01:36:31,291 --> 01:36:35,208
There's a small road
up ahead of us that I know of.
1699
01:36:36,208 --> 01:36:38,750
- There'll... there'll be a garbage can.
- I don't know.
1700
01:36:38,833 --> 01:36:40,833
May... maybe we should just head home.
1701
01:36:43,791 --> 01:36:44,666
To the farm?
1702
01:36:44,750 --> 01:36:46,500
No. To the city.
1703
01:36:47,208 --> 01:36:48,916
I'm worried
we're gonna get stuck out here.
1704
01:36:49,000 --> 01:36:51,833
If we turn off the main road
and get stuck, no one's gonna find us.
1705
01:36:51,916 --> 01:36:53,125
It's not...
1706
01:36:53,208 --> 01:36:56,041
I'm not going to feel right if I don't
1707
01:36:56,125 --> 01:36:58,416
get rid of these. It'll prey on my mind.
1708
01:36:58,500 --> 01:36:59,833
OK? Shit.
1709
01:37:00,333 --> 01:37:01,166
Shit.
1710
01:37:01,625 --> 01:37:04,541
Hey, hey! It's not... it's... it's not...
1711
01:37:04,625 --> 01:37:05,458
it's...
1712
01:37:05,791 --> 01:37:07,125
it's not a big deal.
1713
01:37:07,625 --> 01:37:08,458
Really.
1714
01:37:10,166 --> 01:37:12,208
I know that, Ames.
1715
01:37:12,916 --> 01:37:14,583
- Ames?
- I know that.
1716
01:37:15,458 --> 01:37:17,291
Is that short for Amy?
1717
01:37:18,125 --> 01:37:19,375
That doesn't sound right.
1718
01:37:20,208 --> 01:37:21,791
That doesn't seem like my name.
1719
01:37:22,250 --> 01:37:23,375
Or my nickname.
1720
01:37:23,458 --> 01:37:25,000
Let's go here, real quick.
1721
01:37:28,333 --> 01:37:29,958
And I'll get to show you my high school.
1722
01:37:30,833 --> 01:37:31,666
This...
1723
01:37:32,083 --> 01:37:33,333
this goes to a high school?
1724
01:37:33,416 --> 01:37:37,541
My high school,
where I spent every tortured day.
1725
01:37:37,625 --> 01:37:38,875
For so long.
1726
01:37:39,375 --> 01:37:42,416
For so goddamn... long.
1727
01:37:42,500 --> 01:37:45,458
Can we just turn around?
This doesn't feel right.
1728
01:37:46,083 --> 01:37:48,208
I don't understand.
It's just a... a high school.
1729
01:37:48,291 --> 01:37:50,291
- It feels wrong.
- I can't turn around.
1730
01:37:50,375 --> 01:37:51,541
The road is too narrow.
1731
01:37:52,083 --> 01:37:57,083
I'll just get to the school,
we'll dump the cups, and we'll leave.
1732
01:37:57,166 --> 01:37:58,625
-OK-No, I-I-I don't...
1733
01:37:58,708 --> 01:38:00,333
I don't know what this is.
1734
01:38:00,416 --> 01:38:03,916
It doesn't make any sense to me.
How do school buses get down here?
1735
01:38:04,000 --> 01:38:05,791
It's a rural high school.
1736
01:38:05,875 --> 01:38:08,833
Yeah, I went... I grew up on a farm.
I went to a rural high school.
1737
01:38:08,916 --> 01:38:10,916
We... There was a... there was a...
1738
01:38:11,000 --> 01:38:14,375
...a normal entrance
with a paved fucking road.
1739
01:38:14,458 --> 01:38:17,041
It's fine. Everything is tinged.
1740
01:38:17,958 --> 01:38:21,333
OK? That's the thing
you have to realize.
1741
01:38:21,416 --> 01:38:24,833
- It's tinged?
- Colored by mood, by emotion,
1742
01:38:24,916 --> 01:38:26,416
by past experience.
1743
01:38:26,500 --> 01:38:29,750
There is no objective reality.
1744
01:38:30,333 --> 01:38:33,291
You know there's no color
in the universe, right?
1745
01:38:33,375 --> 01:38:36,041
Only in the brain.
1746
01:38:36,125 --> 01:38:39,375
Just electromagnetic frequencies,
the brain tinges them.
1747
01:38:39,458 --> 01:38:42,250
Yes, I am a physicist.
I know what color is.
1748
01:38:42,333 --> 01:38:44,000
Yes, yes. Yes, you are.
1749
01:38:45,250 --> 01:38:46,166
You do.
1750
01:38:46,250 --> 01:38:47,958
Color is the deeds of light.
1751
01:38:50,375 --> 01:38:52,125
It's the deeds and suffering.
1752
01:38:54,083 --> 01:38:55,125
That's beautiful.
1753
01:38:58,666 --> 01:39:00,958
It's not physicist talk,
1754
01:39:02,375 --> 01:39:04,958
but eminently poetic.
1755
01:39:05,291 --> 01:39:07,625
Yeah, well, I am a poet after all.
1756
01:39:07,708 --> 01:39:09,375
You are. It's beautiful.
1757
01:39:09,458 --> 01:39:12,416
- This road seems excessively long.
- Seems.
1758
01:39:12,500 --> 01:39:13,916
That's the operative word.
1759
01:39:14,000 --> 01:39:16,916
Time is another thing
that exists only in the brain.
1760
01:39:17,000 --> 01:39:20,083
- And yet we get older.
- Older and older, older and older.
1761
01:39:20,791 --> 01:39:23,166
Or so it seems.
1762
01:39:23,625 --> 01:39:24,833
Sometimes I feel...
1763
01:39:25,666 --> 01:39:27,625
I'm much younger
1764
01:39:28,291 --> 01:39:31,166
than I actually am,
like still a kid inside,
1765
01:39:31,250 --> 01:39:33,291
until I pass a mirror.
1766
01:39:33,375 --> 01:39:35,625
- Is younger better?
- Yes.
1767
01:39:36,208 --> 01:39:39,375
I think so. It's admirable.
1768
01:39:40,250 --> 01:39:41,916
Youth is admirable?
1769
01:39:44,041 --> 01:39:46,458
How can you admire a person for their age?
1770
01:39:46,833 --> 01:39:49,583
It's like admiring a certain point
in a stream.
1771
01:39:51,000 --> 01:39:52,458
It's healthier,
1772
01:39:53,083 --> 01:39:54,208
it's brighter,
1773
01:39:55,250 --> 01:39:56,583
it's more fun.
1774
01:39:57,333 --> 01:39:59,166
More attractive, hopeful.
1775
01:40:00,125 --> 01:40:01,708
Like a Coca-Cola commercial.
1776
01:40:01,791 --> 01:40:03,875
Almost all groundbreaking work
1777
01:40:04,833 --> 01:40:07,791
in science and the arts
is done by young people.
1778
01:40:07,875 --> 01:40:10,125
Old people are the ash heap of youth.
1779
01:40:10,208 --> 01:40:12,375
Listen, Jake,
I-I'm thinking that we need to...
1780
01:40:12,458 --> 01:40:13,500
Ta-da!
1781
01:40:15,500 --> 01:40:18,083
Wow.
I didn't expect anything so enormous.
1782
01:40:18,166 --> 01:40:20,500
One hundred and thirty classrooms,
1783
01:40:20,583 --> 01:40:24,041
a gymnasium, two locker rooms,
boys, girls,
1784
01:40:24,125 --> 01:40:27,708
auditorium, ten bathrooms,
six administrative offices,
1785
01:40:28,375 --> 01:40:29,458
teachers' lounge,
1786
01:40:30,291 --> 01:40:31,333
counselor's center.
1787
01:40:31,416 --> 01:40:34,333
It's regional, so 11 towns feed into it.
1788
01:40:35,125 --> 01:40:36,750
Well, you certainly know your high school.
1789
01:40:36,833 --> 01:40:38,166
Like the back of my hand.
1790
01:40:45,166 --> 01:40:47,375
- There's someone here.
- School maintenance?
1791
01:40:47,458 --> 01:40:48,958
Janitor? Something.
1792
01:40:49,458 --> 01:40:50,291
Ah.
1793
01:40:50,375 --> 01:40:51,416
What?
1794
01:40:51,500 --> 01:40:52,333
There.
1795
01:40:52,666 --> 01:40:54,833
Trash can. I knew it. Be right back.
1796
01:41:24,958 --> 01:41:26,125
Come on!
1797
01:41:26,833 --> 01:41:27,750
Good. Yes, yes!
1798
01:41:31,000 --> 01:41:31,916
Where were you?
1799
01:41:32,000 --> 01:41:35,750
That bin was filled with road salt
for the...
1800
01:41:36,500 --> 01:41:37,333
ice.
1801
01:41:37,750 --> 01:41:39,000
I remembered there's a...
1802
01:41:39,375 --> 01:41:42,083
a dumpster on the other side
near the loading docks.
1803
01:41:42,541 --> 01:41:44,250
- Mission accomplished.
- Let's go.
1804
01:41:44,333 --> 01:41:45,333
It's humid in here.
1805
01:41:52,083 --> 01:41:53,083
Kind of peaceful.
1806
01:41:53,166 --> 01:41:55,375
More creepy than peaceful, I'd say.
1807
01:41:55,458 --> 01:41:56,958
- I don't agree.
- I want to go.
1808
01:41:57,041 --> 01:41:59,041
- What's the rush all of a sudden?
- All of the sudden?
1809
01:41:59,125 --> 01:42:03,083
I've been like a broken record all night,
telling you that I wanted to go home.
1810
01:42:03,166 --> 01:42:07,625
I've given you like 40 reasons
why I need to get back tonight.
1811
01:42:14,708 --> 01:42:16,416
- I guess that's true.
- You guess?
1812
01:42:19,166 --> 01:42:20,541
I just thought...
1813
01:42:20,625 --> 01:42:21,500
You know.
1814
01:42:23,875 --> 01:42:26,208
It's peaceful and quiet here.
1815
01:42:29,750 --> 01:42:31,291
Baby, it's cold outside.
1816
01:42:32,208 --> 01:42:33,041
Really?
1817
01:42:35,541 --> 01:42:37,416
You're gonna quote a rape song at me?
1818
01:42:39,166 --> 01:42:40,083
It's not a...
1819
01:42:40,625 --> 01:42:41,750
it's not a rape song.
1820
01:42:41,833 --> 01:42:44,375
She keeps saying she wants to leave.
He keeps ignoring her.
1821
01:42:44,458 --> 01:42:45,708
What would you call that?
1822
01:42:47,583 --> 01:42:50,875
She wants to stay. She's just afraid
of what people will think.
1823
01:42:50,958 --> 01:42:53,833
She asks him, "What have you put
in my damn drink?"
1824
01:42:54,208 --> 01:42:57,875
Jesus. The song was written in 1936.
1825
01:42:57,958 --> 01:43:00,166
It's not about roofies!
1826
01:43:00,250 --> 01:43:03,416
Roofies or not, he's trying to break down
her defenses with strong liquor.
1827
01:43:03,500 --> 01:43:05,750
And anyway, they had mickeys in the '30s.
1828
01:43:05,833 --> 01:43:07,291
It's a song about coercion.
1829
01:43:09,666 --> 01:43:11,750
I don't know why you're getting so angry.
1830
01:43:11,833 --> 01:43:12,875
I just want to go home.
1831
01:43:12,958 --> 01:43:15,625
- To the farmhouse?
- Not to the fucking farmhouse,
1832
01:43:15,708 --> 01:43:16,875
to my house!
1833
01:43:17,416 --> 01:43:18,916
Jake, my house!
1834
01:43:19,000 --> 01:43:20,250
OK.
1835
01:43:20,333 --> 01:43:22,208
Thank you.
1836
01:43:22,291 --> 01:43:24,916
And then... and then he says,
"what's the point in hurting my pride,"
1837
01:43:25,000 --> 01:43:27,666
like it's her job to make this guy
feel sexually attractive.
1838
01:43:27,750 --> 01:43:29,666
Regardless of her own desires,
like that's...
1839
01:43:29,750 --> 01:43:31,291
like that's her responsibility.
1840
01:43:31,375 --> 01:43:32,416
I see that.
1841
01:43:34,541 --> 01:43:36,583
You have convinced me. I'm sorry.
1842
01:43:48,958 --> 01:43:50,000
I'm sorry.
1843
01:43:53,125 --> 01:43:54,041
It's all right.
1844
01:44:14,250 --> 01:44:15,416
Jesus.
1845
01:44:15,500 --> 01:44:16,708
What? What?
1846
01:44:17,875 --> 01:44:19,333
There was someone watching us.
1847
01:44:19,416 --> 01:44:21,541
- I didn't see anyone.
- Well, he was watching us.
1848
01:44:21,625 --> 01:44:23,083
Like... like a goddamn pervert.
1849
01:44:23,166 --> 01:44:25,250
- Let's go.
- Believe me, I'm very familiar
1850
01:44:25,333 --> 01:44:26,708
with that particular look.
1851
01:44:26,791 --> 01:44:29,458
Jake, I just...
What the hell does that mean?
1852
01:44:29,541 --> 01:44:31,166
I'm going to give him a piece of my mind.
1853
01:44:31,250 --> 01:44:33,166
- Jake, don't be ridiculous.
- It's not acceptable.
1854
01:44:33,250 --> 01:44:35,041
- Jake, let's just go.
- No.
1855
01:44:35,125 --> 01:44:38,375
- You don't...
- I'll be right back. This...
1856
01:44:41,791 --> 01:44:42,625
It...
1857
01:44:42,708 --> 01:44:44,875
- It's unacceptable!
- Let's go! Jake, let's just go!
1858
01:44:44,958 --> 01:44:47,625
- I'll be right back.
- Don't! Jake! Don't, please!
1859
01:44:50,166 --> 01:44:51,000
Jake!
1860
01:44:53,083 --> 01:44:54,166
Crap!
1861
01:44:57,791 --> 01:44:59,666
Oh, I shouldn't have come.
I shouldn't have come.
1862
01:45:02,375 --> 01:45:04,125
Aah, fuck!
1863
01:45:10,208 --> 01:45:12,791
It's hard to say no.
I was never taught that.
1864
01:45:13,958 --> 01:45:15,625
It's easier just to say yes.
1865
01:45:16,916 --> 01:45:18,708
Anyway, sometimes
you're just caught off guard.
1866
01:45:18,791 --> 01:45:20,958
And the request comes,
can I have your number?
1867
01:45:21,041 --> 01:45:22,916
And the easiest way out of it
is just to say yes,
1868
01:45:23,000 --> 01:45:25,916
and then that yes turns into more yes,
and then it's yes, yes, yes.
1869
01:45:39,625 --> 01:45:41,166
He's not a monster, he...
1870
01:45:46,666 --> 01:45:47,500
Jake?
1871
01:45:58,083 --> 01:45:59,250
He doesn't beat you.
1872
01:46:00,208 --> 01:46:01,041
Right?
1873
01:46:03,000 --> 01:46:04,875
I'm certain the sex has been good.
1874
01:46:04,958 --> 01:46:06,333
At least some of the time.
1875
01:46:06,791 --> 01:46:07,625
Just...
1876
01:46:09,458 --> 01:46:11,750
How long does it take to get hypothermia?
1877
01:46:12,958 --> 01:46:13,791
Eh...
1878
01:46:15,291 --> 01:46:17,875
Maybe it's not a bad way to go
if I have to go.
1879
01:46:34,083 --> 01:46:34,916
Jake?
1880
01:46:36,541 --> 01:46:37,375
Jake?
1881
01:46:40,000 --> 01:46:41,166
Jake!
1882
01:46:42,375 --> 01:46:45,333
Shit, shit, shit!
1883
01:46:46,875 --> 01:46:48,083
Oh, my God.
1884
01:46:49,500 --> 01:46:51,291
Piece of shit! Shit!
1885
01:46:52,000 --> 01:46:53,416
Shit, shit!
1886
01:46:59,458 --> 01:47:00,333
Oh, God.
1887
01:48:21,625 --> 01:48:22,458
Jake?
1888
01:48:26,750 --> 01:48:29,166
Jake, I wanna go. Please?
1889
01:49:01,791 --> 01:49:02,791
Ah.
1890
01:49:19,833 --> 01:49:20,666
Oh...
1891
01:49:21,750 --> 01:49:22,583
Hello.
1892
01:49:24,208 --> 01:49:25,083
Hello.
1893
01:49:26,208 --> 01:49:28,041
I'm sorry. M-My...
1894
01:49:28,125 --> 01:49:29,333
My boyfriend came in here.
1895
01:49:29,416 --> 01:49:32,000
I think he went to school here
a while back.
1896
01:49:34,833 --> 01:49:36,791
Maybe you know him, I.. I... I don't...
1897
01:49:36,875 --> 01:49:39,208
I don't... I don't know
if you were here when...
1898
01:49:39,291 --> 01:49:40,666
when he was a student.
1899
01:49:40,750 --> 01:49:43,041
I mean, how would I know? Anyway, I...
1900
01:49:43,500 --> 01:49:45,750
You haven't seen anyone around here,
have you?
1901
01:49:47,083 --> 01:49:49,166
What does your boyfriend
look like?
1902
01:49:53,916 --> 01:49:55,625
It's hard to describe people.
1903
01:50:00,041 --> 01:50:02,583
It was so long ago, I barely remember.
1904
01:50:03,791 --> 01:50:04,625
I mean...
1905
01:50:07,833 --> 01:50:09,125
We never even talked,
1906
01:50:09,666 --> 01:50:12,958
is the truth. I'm not even sure
I registered him. There's a lot of people.
1907
01:50:13,041 --> 01:50:14,708
I was there with my girlfriend...
1908
01:50:15,208 --> 01:50:16,791
We were celebrating our anniversary,
1909
01:50:16,875 --> 01:50:18,875
stopped in for a drink,
and then this guy
1910
01:50:19,208 --> 01:50:20,375
kept looking at me.
1911
01:50:20,875 --> 01:50:22,125
It's a nuisance.
1912
01:50:22,541 --> 01:50:25,000
The occupational hazard of...
of being a female.
1913
01:50:25,083 --> 01:50:27,416
You can't even go for a drink.
Always being looked at.
1914
01:50:27,500 --> 01:50:29,500
He was a creeper! You know?
1915
01:50:31,541 --> 01:50:34,750
And I remember thinking,
I wish my boyfriend was here.
1916
01:50:35,416 --> 01:50:36,583
Which is...
1917
01:50:36,666 --> 01:50:37,625
That's sort of sad,
1918
01:50:37,708 --> 01:50:40,500
that being a woman,
the only way a guy leaves you alone
1919
01:50:40,583 --> 01:50:42,000
is if you're with another guy.
1920
01:50:42,083 --> 01:50:43,083
Like, if... like...
1921
01:50:43,166 --> 01:50:45,541
like you've been claimed.
Like you're property, even then.
1922
01:50:45,625 --> 01:50:46,708
Anyway, I can't...
1923
01:50:48,083 --> 01:50:50,125
I can't remember what he looks like.
1924
01:50:52,000 --> 01:50:53,000
Why would I?
1925
01:50:54,958 --> 01:50:56,125
Nothing happened.
1926
01:50:58,208 --> 01:50:59,250
Maybe it was just...
1927
01:51:00,958 --> 01:51:02,083
I think it was just...
1928
01:51:02,458 --> 01:51:07,041
Just one of thousands
of such non-interactions in my life.
1929
01:51:15,500 --> 01:51:18,958
It's like asking me to describe
a mosquito that bit me
1930
01:51:19,041 --> 01:51:21,000
on an evening 40 years ago.
1931
01:51:28,416 --> 01:51:31,625
Well, you haven't seen anyone
fitting that description, have you?
1932
01:51:31,708 --> 01:51:32,958
I haven't seen anyone.
1933
01:51:35,291 --> 01:51:36,250
OK.
1934
01:51:37,000 --> 01:51:37,833
I mean...
1935
01:51:38,500 --> 01:51:40,041
except you. I see you.
1936
01:51:50,375 --> 01:51:51,250
I'm... I'm...
1937
01:51:52,666 --> 01:51:54,291
I'm a little worried about him.
1938
01:51:55,833 --> 01:51:57,791
I'm sure there's no need.
1939
01:51:59,583 --> 01:52:01,208
He's safe if he's here.
1940
01:52:02,333 --> 01:52:03,541
It's safe in here.
1941
01:52:04,583 --> 01:52:05,750
It's quiet.
1942
01:52:26,708 --> 01:52:28,791
Is it OK if I look around for him?
1943
01:52:33,791 --> 01:52:36,916
Maybe take your wet shoes off.
I've just cleaned the floors.
1944
01:52:44,541 --> 01:52:45,375
No...
1945
01:52:46,666 --> 01:52:47,708
They're yours.
1946
01:53:08,583 --> 01:53:09,416
Bye.
1947
01:53:10,625 --> 01:53:11,458
Yeah.
1948
01:53:12,333 --> 01:53:13,166
Bye.
1949
01:53:30,416 --> 01:53:31,250
Jake?
1950
01:53:34,708 --> 01:53:35,583
Jake?
1951
01:53:37,333 --> 01:53:38,166
Jake?
1952
02:00:36,875 --> 02:00:37,708
Ah.
1953
02:01:41,958 --> 02:01:42,791
Ah!
1954
02:01:50,916 --> 02:01:51,750
Aah!
1955
02:02:53,583 --> 02:02:54,708
- Oh.
- Come.
1956
02:02:56,041 --> 02:02:56,875
Join me.
1957
02:03:18,333 --> 02:03:20,833
It's not bad once you stop
feeling sorry for yourself
1958
02:03:20,916 --> 02:03:22,250
because you're just a pig,
1959
02:03:22,666 --> 02:03:25,791
or, even worse,
a pig infested with maggots.
1960
02:03:25,875 --> 02:03:28,500
Someone has to be
a pig infested with maggots, right?
1961
02:03:29,166 --> 02:03:31,791
It might as well be you.
It's the luck of the draw.
1962
02:03:32,083 --> 02:03:35,791
You play the hand you're dealt.
You make lemonade. You... you move on.
1963
02:03:35,875 --> 02:03:37,208
You don't worry about a thing.
1964
02:03:37,291 --> 02:03:40,500
- That song has always made me cry.
- I've always loved it.
1965
02:03:40,583 --> 02:03:44,375
There is kindness in the world, you know?
You have to search for it, but it's there.
1966
02:03:44,458 --> 02:03:46,625
- You're kind.
- Eh, I'm just evolving.
1967
02:03:46,708 --> 02:03:49,958
Even now, even as a ghost, as a memory.
1968
02:03:50,041 --> 02:03:51,375
As dust, as you will.
1969
02:03:51,458 --> 02:03:52,333
We're the same.
1970
02:03:52,416 --> 02:03:54,875
Everything is the same
when you look close enough.
1971
02:03:55,208 --> 02:03:56,833
As a physicist, you know that.
1972
02:03:56,916 --> 02:04:00,208
You, me, ideas. We're all one thing.
1973
02:04:01,208 --> 02:04:02,333
Let's get you dressed.
1974
02:04:12,916 --> 02:04:13,750
Thank you.
1975
02:04:16,625 --> 02:04:17,458
Thank you.
1976
02:04:25,333 --> 02:04:26,416
I accept.
1977
02:04:29,000 --> 02:04:30,250
I accept...
1978
02:04:32,666 --> 02:04:33,541
it all.
1979
02:04:34,458 --> 02:04:36,583
Accept your acknowledgment,
1980
02:04:37,125 --> 02:04:38,750
this... award.
1981
02:04:39,166 --> 02:04:40,666
I accept all...
1982
02:04:41,541 --> 02:04:42,791
that it entails.
1983
02:04:44,041 --> 02:04:45,625
That this award comes...
1984
02:04:46,750 --> 02:04:51,125
near the end of a long, fruitful life,
1985
02:04:53,333 --> 02:04:55,583
in acknowledgment for the work I did
1986
02:04:56,125 --> 02:04:57,458
decades ago.
1987
02:04:58,083 --> 02:05:02,291
My quest has taken me
through the physical, the metaphysical,
1988
02:05:03,000 --> 02:05:03,958
the delusional...
1989
02:05:05,416 --> 02:05:06,416
And back.
1990
02:05:07,375 --> 02:05:10,000
And I have made the most important...
1991
02:05:11,041 --> 02:05:13,958
discovery of my career...
1992
02:05:15,000 --> 02:05:17,125
The most important discovery
of my life.
1993
02:05:21,000 --> 02:05:24,416
It is only in the mysterious equations
of love...
1994
02:05:28,208 --> 02:05:31,458
That any logical reasons can be found.
1995
02:05:36,750 --> 02:05:38,750
I am only here tonight because of you.
1996
02:05:42,708 --> 02:05:45,250
You are the reason I am.
1997
02:05:53,083 --> 02:05:55,083
You are all my reasons.
1998
02:05:59,250 --> 02:06:00,083
Thank you.