1
00:00:15,507 --> 00:00:16,507
[lips popping]
2
00:00:16,631 --> 00:00:17,975
[Richard trilling] Bro.
3
00:00:19,413 --> 00:00:20,960
Why.
4
00:00:21,719 --> 00:00:22,991
[Richard scatting]
5
00:00:23,006 --> 00:00:24,006
Pha, Pha, Pha...
6
00:00:24,272 --> 00:00:25,612
Sa, Sa, Sa...
7
00:00:25,651 --> 00:00:27,189
Fa, Fa, Fa...
8
00:00:27,273 --> 00:00:28,629
La, La, La...
9
00:00:28,644 --> 00:00:29,858
Pha, Pha, Pha...
10
00:00:29,873 --> 00:00:31,372
Ka, Ka, Ka....
11
00:00:31,387 --> 00:00:32,282
Bastard.
12
00:00:32,297 --> 00:00:33,597
Brr, brr, brr...
13
00:00:33,640 --> 00:00:34,746
Brian.
14
00:00:34,855 --> 00:00:36,323
Brrrra.
15
00:00:36,679 --> 00:00:37,679
Bastard.
16
00:00:37,746 --> 00:00:38,910
[Richard clearing throat]
17
00:00:38,959 --> 00:00:39,959
Roo.
18
00:00:40,014 --> 00:00:43,404
Ahem. I saw Susie
sitting in a shoe shine shop.
19
00:00:43,491 --> 00:00:45,271
Barbara. Bastard.
20
00:00:45,717 --> 00:00:47,935
Lemons, Lennon, liniment.
21
00:00:48,092 --> 00:00:50,513
No. Lennon's lemon liniment.
22
00:00:50,614 --> 00:00:52,364
[woman] A touch more powder,
Mr. Thorncroft.
23
00:00:52,388 --> 00:00:53,576
Okay.
24
00:00:55,538 --> 00:00:56,764
[clears throat]
25
00:00:57,709 --> 00:00:59,053
There he is.
26
00:01:01,818 --> 00:01:03,373
Okay, Clive, let's do this.
27
00:01:03,428 --> 00:01:06,865
Hey, Richie, I'm just prepping
for the stunt later on, okay?
28
00:01:06,951 --> 00:01:09,545
- Mm-hm. Mm-hm.
- So, Pat, she's gonna faint, okay?
29
00:01:09,631 --> 00:01:11,631
And then you pull her up like this:
30
00:01:11,834 --> 00:01:13,623
Keeping this very strong.
31
00:01:13,701 --> 00:01:15,662
- Yep.
- Pelvis close and go for the kiss.
32
00:01:15,717 --> 00:01:18,662
- Watch this.
- Clive, okay. I have read the script.
33
00:01:18,829 --> 00:01:20,225
Something like this?
34
00:01:21,081 --> 00:01:22,349
I've got you.
35
00:01:22,678 --> 00:01:24,553
You've got me all right.
36
00:01:25,454 --> 00:01:27,897
[crowd whistling and cheering]
37
00:01:28,304 --> 00:01:30,584
[sighs] Save it for the take, baby.
38
00:01:30,724 --> 00:01:32,101
- Plenty more where that came from. Ha, ha.
- [chuckles]
39
00:01:32,125 --> 00:01:35,420
That was okay,
but don't open your mouth when you kiss
40
00:01:35,498 --> 00:01:37,748
because it spreads germs
all around the set.
41
00:01:37,826 --> 00:01:39,249
- When you're acting, purse...
- Clive.
42
00:01:39,273 --> 00:01:41,756
- ..your lips.
- Clive. Clive. Clive.
43
00:01:41,998 --> 00:01:43,483
We weren't acting. [chuckles]
44
00:01:43,604 --> 00:01:45,709
- I was acting.
- What?
45
00:01:46,259 --> 00:01:48,029
Whoo-hoo-hoo!
46
00:01:48,245 --> 00:01:49,467
Hello.
47
00:01:49,654 --> 00:01:53,529
Pow! This little firecracker
is the real star of Mindhorn.
48
00:01:53,568 --> 00:01:55,728
[chuckles] Maybe I could get
some more lines next time.
49
00:01:55,778 --> 00:01:57,008
[Richard laughing] That's a good one.
50
00:01:57,032 --> 00:02:00,420
- That's your handbrake there.
- Yeah, okay, walk away, Clive, walk away.
51
00:02:00,686 --> 00:02:02,490
- Ready to shoot.
- [chuckles]
52
00:02:02,606 --> 00:02:04,201
Shoes, Clive.
53
00:02:04,326 --> 00:02:06,068
[Clive] Shoes coming in.
54
00:02:06,286 --> 00:02:07,717
Shoes are safe.
55
00:02:07,980 --> 00:02:09,225
[grunts]
56
00:02:10,811 --> 00:02:12,365
Shoes going on.
57
00:02:13,551 --> 00:02:14,936
Shoes on.
58
00:02:16,589 --> 00:02:18,108
Okay, let's go.
59
00:02:19,453 --> 00:02:21,904
[man 1] Okay, guys, first positions.
60
00:02:22,054 --> 00:02:23,084
You know I love you.
61
00:02:23,115 --> 00:02:24,162
[man 1] Turn over.
62
00:02:24,248 --> 00:02:25,248
I love you, too, honey.
63
00:02:25,307 --> 00:02:26,662
[man 2] Sound running.
64
00:02:27,161 --> 00:02:28,780
- Truth time.
- [man 1] Action!
65
00:02:30,104 --> 00:02:33,412
[narrator] In 1983, Special Agent
Bruce P. Mindhorn was captured
66
00:02:33,513 --> 00:02:36,342
during a secret operation
on the Siberian border.
67
00:02:36,506 --> 00:02:39,998
Communist doctors performed
experimental cybernetic surgery upon him.
68
00:02:40,178 --> 00:02:44,871
They removed his eye and replaced it
with a super-advanced optical lie detector
69
00:02:45,512 --> 00:02:48,723
which meant
he could literally see the truth.
70
00:02:49,641 --> 00:02:54,051
He escaped Russia
and returned home to the Isle of Man.
71
00:02:55,463 --> 00:02:57,999
Bruce Mindhorn became
the best plainclothes detective
72
00:02:58,066 --> 00:02:59,367
the Isle of Man had ever seen.
73
00:02:59,448 --> 00:03:00,863
[woman grunts]
74
00:03:01,461 --> 00:03:05,324
In a world of lies,
one man has had enough.
75
00:03:06,260 --> 00:03:08,495
You can't hide the truth from...
76
00:03:08,789 --> 00:03:12,230
♪♪ Mindhorn.
*MINDHORN*
77
00:03:14,223 --> 00:03:18,058
[man] Richard Thorncroft is an actor
on the crest of a wave.
78
00:03:18,215 --> 00:03:22,176
Richard, he's strong
and sprints like a panther.
79
00:03:23,824 --> 00:03:27,957
Acting is 95 percent physicality.
80
00:03:28,561 --> 00:03:30,558
That's why I practice capoeira.
81
00:03:31,785 --> 00:03:34,518
[man] Here we see Richard demonstrating
the art of the Ginga
82
00:03:34,584 --> 00:03:36,996
that gives him his flexibility
as an actor.
83
00:03:37,406 --> 00:03:41,504
Your mouth's saying no,
but your brain's saying yes.
84
00:03:41,792 --> 00:03:44,387
[man] But in real life,
Richard's eye has fallen on
85
00:03:44,433 --> 00:03:48,387
part-time actress and full-time lovely
Patricia Deville.
86
00:03:48,479 --> 00:03:53,223
Richard and I are a wonderful team,
both at work and, hopefully,
87
00:03:53,918 --> 00:03:55,058
in life forever.
88
00:03:55,134 --> 00:03:58,465
[man] Such is the success of Mindhorn,
it's rumored that Windjammer,
89
00:03:58,582 --> 00:04:01,176
played by Peter Easterman,
may even get his own show.
90
00:04:01,270 --> 00:04:03,730
[laughing]
91
00:04:03,878 --> 00:04:09,167
I... I... I can't envisage
any kind of spin-off.
92
00:04:09,394 --> 00:04:12,480
[man] Spin-offs or not,
Richard's star is burning bright
93
00:04:12,582 --> 00:04:15,371
thanks to publicity genius
Jeffrey Moncrief.
94
00:04:15,488 --> 00:04:18,769
We work hard on Mindhorn,
but we play hard, too.
95
00:04:18,933 --> 00:04:20,397
Sometimes too hard. Heh.
96
00:04:20,481 --> 00:04:22,332
Hello, rehab. [laughing]
97
00:04:22,761 --> 00:04:23,962
[man] But to stay at the top,
98
00:04:24,012 --> 00:04:26,754
you need to be remarkable
both on-screen and off,
99
00:04:26,840 --> 00:04:29,785
and Richard certainly knows
how to play that game.
100
00:04:30,099 --> 00:04:32,368
The Isle of Man is a ****hole.
101
00:04:32,505 --> 00:04:34,152
What?
102
00:04:35,282 --> 00:04:37,574
Peter Easterman
is not a great actor.
103
00:04:37,996 --> 00:04:39,629
But when he is acting, he...
104
00:04:39,754 --> 00:04:42,730
at least he stands
there and does stuff.
105
00:04:42,840 --> 00:04:44,973
[man] Whether Richard's winning awards
for his acting
106
00:04:45,105 --> 00:04:48,410
or courting controversy
on top-rated chat shows,
107
00:04:48,582 --> 00:04:52,535
it seems nothing can stop him
heading all the way to the top.
108
00:04:52,652 --> 00:04:55,111
I'm going to Hollywood. Bye.
109
00:05:07,620 --> 00:05:09,932
[man 1] Police in the Isle of Man
have discovered the body
110
00:05:10,026 --> 00:05:12,573
of a young woman
washed up on Douglas beach.
111
00:05:13,128 --> 00:05:16,198
[woman 1] Police are treating
Katya Lipinskii's death as murder.
112
00:05:18,050 --> 00:05:19,322
[man 2] Police have confirmed
113
00:05:19,389 --> 00:05:21,995
they have received several phone calls
from the suspect,
114
00:05:22,045 --> 00:05:24,487
but have refused to
divulge the content.
115
00:05:34,220 --> 00:05:36,018
[phone ringing]
116
00:05:46,175 --> 00:05:47,745
It's Plasticine.
117
00:05:49,064 --> 00:05:50,440
It's here.
118
00:05:51,739 --> 00:05:53,409
[ringing continues]
119
00:05:56,190 --> 00:05:57,315
Hello?
120
00:05:57,440 --> 00:05:58,762
[Melly] I've told you before,
121
00:05:58,828 --> 00:06:02,878
there's only one person I will speak to,
Detective Mindhorn.
122
00:06:03,050 --> 00:06:05,120
- Melly?
- My name is The Kestrel.
123
00:06:05,261 --> 00:06:06,261
[Melly squawking]
124
00:06:06,349 --> 00:06:08,081
Sorry. Sorry, sorry.
125
00:06:08,660 --> 00:06:10,917
- The Kestrel.
- Thank you.
126
00:06:11,431 --> 00:06:13,182
I'll call the police station tomorrow
127
00:06:13,243 --> 00:06:16,057
and if I'm not talking
to Detective Mindhorn in person,
128
00:06:16,190 --> 00:06:17,870
more people are going to die.
129
00:06:18,206 --> 00:06:19,348
Signing off.
130
00:06:19,449 --> 00:06:20,636
- [Melly squawking]
- [grunts]
131
00:06:20,794 --> 00:06:22,386
[shouts]
132
00:06:25,284 --> 00:06:26,368
[Green] Chief?
133
00:06:26,451 --> 00:06:28,065
[Newsome] Oh, great.
134
00:06:28,358 --> 00:06:32,573
Our chief suspect wants to talk
to a fictional fucking detective.
135
00:06:34,323 --> 00:06:35,542
Mindhorn.
136
00:06:35,620 --> 00:06:37,846
It was fucking shite and all.
137
00:06:38,935 --> 00:06:41,151
Have you heard of haemotracteathosis?
138
00:06:41,375 --> 00:06:44,077
It was on the menu
at my local Indian restaurant last night.
139
00:06:44,297 --> 00:06:45,581
[both laughing]
140
00:06:45,925 --> 00:06:48,175
Bruce, let me help you with this case.
141
00:06:48,300 --> 00:06:50,237
I've told you before, I work alone.
142
00:06:50,386 --> 00:06:51,550
What are we gonna do, chief?
143
00:06:51,604 --> 00:06:52,636
You're crazy!
144
00:06:52,716 --> 00:06:55,651
[Newsome] We've got 24 hours to produce
a convincing Mindhorn.
145
00:06:55,831 --> 00:06:57,871
We'll have to bring the actor over
to take the call.
146
00:06:57,948 --> 00:06:59,689
Tell that to the people
who stole my eye.
147
00:06:59,756 --> 00:07:02,401
- Now, let's just think about this.
- [Newsome] Green's right.
148
00:07:02,731 --> 00:07:05,636
Believe me, I wish that he wasn't.
149
00:07:05,987 --> 00:07:08,221
Get me Mindhorn.
150
00:07:09,866 --> 00:07:11,917
[Mindhorn on recording]
It's truth time.
151
00:07:19,131 --> 00:07:20,534
[Richard] Baboons.
152
00:07:20,853 --> 00:07:23,159
Baboons bring bliss.
153
00:07:23,370 --> 00:07:26,167
The Benedict Cumberbatch backlash
has begun.
154
00:07:31,253 --> 00:07:35,143
You are exactly
where you need to be.
155
00:07:39,432 --> 00:07:42,940
You are a powerful tiger.
156
00:07:43,128 --> 00:07:44,354
Let's do this.
157
00:07:44,471 --> 00:07:47,167
[speaking indistinctly]
158
00:07:47,307 --> 00:07:49,439
- Bugger. Bugger.
- [man] Oi, keep it down, will you?
159
00:07:49,506 --> 00:07:50,964
Yeah, okay. Sorry.
160
00:07:51,124 --> 00:07:52,495
What you doing in there?
161
00:07:52,647 --> 00:07:54,096
[man knocking on wall]
162
00:07:54,845 --> 00:07:56,647
[humming]
163
00:07:57,547 --> 00:07:59,675
[singing] Can't handcuff the wind
164
00:08:02,631 --> 00:08:05,456
Ah, hello, lovely. Here for the casting.
Richard Thorncroft.
165
00:08:05,588 --> 00:08:08,768
Oh, great. Mr. Branagh's nearly ready
for you, Richard.
166
00:08:09,011 --> 00:08:10,627
- Crowthorne?
- Thorncroft.
167
00:08:11,127 --> 00:08:12,409
The B man.
168
00:08:12,495 --> 00:08:13,956
Kenny B.
169
00:08:14,081 --> 00:08:17,463
[laughing] Bloody good to see you.
170
00:08:17,581 --> 00:08:20,518
Ah ha! Let's crack this baby open.
171
00:08:22,901 --> 00:08:26,284
Hi. Richard Crowthorne,
eleven o'clock?
172
00:08:26,776 --> 00:08:28,011
Oh.
173
00:08:28,659 --> 00:08:29,783
Right.
174
00:08:29,929 --> 00:08:32,331
[imitates Jamaican accent]
I speak the truth.
175
00:08:32,549 --> 00:08:34,753
I am afeared of no man.
176
00:08:35,073 --> 00:08:37,487
I am afeared of no creature.
177
00:08:37,628 --> 00:08:39,331
I am my own man.
178
00:08:39,589 --> 00:08:42,471
I am Clifton of Port Antonio.
179
00:08:42,692 --> 00:08:44,878
Do you feel me?
180
00:08:45,929 --> 00:08:47,300
Yeah, that's incredible.
181
00:08:47,432 --> 00:08:49,159
That's... That's literally incredible.
182
00:08:49,276 --> 00:08:50,440
[clears throat]
183
00:08:50,533 --> 00:08:52,236
- [in normal voice] Thank you.
- You're welcome.
184
00:08:52,260 --> 00:08:54,987
Really, I mean, I don't know what to say,
but thank you.
185
00:08:55,073 --> 00:08:57,007
I wanna try something.
I'd like to do it again.
186
00:08:57,073 --> 00:08:59,300
But this time
I'd like to try it with a brogue.
187
00:08:59,360 --> 00:09:02,018
Uh, no, I think we...
We're good, we've got everything.
188
00:09:02,089 --> 00:09:04,047
I've seen everything
I could possibly want.
189
00:09:04,114 --> 00:09:05,324
- You sure?
- [Kenneth] Oh, yeah.
190
00:09:05,348 --> 00:09:06,384
Okay.
191
00:09:06,583 --> 00:09:09,573
Well, acting aside,
it's been great to catch up.
192
00:09:09,598 --> 00:09:10,706
[Richard laughing]
193
00:09:10,792 --> 00:09:14,073
Kenny B. This guy was one crazy hombre
back in the day.
194
00:09:14,167 --> 00:09:16,104
Do you remember
that hotel in Maidstone?
195
00:09:16,370 --> 00:09:18,263
Oh, who can... Who can...
Who can forget that?
196
00:09:18,436 --> 00:09:20,206
- Did a tour of Medway basin.
- Thank you.
197
00:09:20,404 --> 00:09:22,096
And this fella... [chuckles]
198
00:09:22,232 --> 00:09:24,072
Well, they'll have to re-paper
that hotel room.
199
00:09:24,128 --> 00:09:26,903
- [chuckles] Yeah.
- I love what you're doing these days.
200
00:09:27,073 --> 00:09:29,909
Ken, I really admire your balls. Okay.
201
00:09:30,046 --> 00:09:31,284
The B man.
202
00:09:31,459 --> 00:09:32,487
Alrighty.
203
00:09:32,644 --> 00:09:34,050
[Richard] The killer B.
204
00:09:34,945 --> 00:09:36,409
The Branflake.
205
00:09:38,281 --> 00:09:41,323
- Who was that?
- Not a fucking clue.
206
00:09:41,936 --> 00:09:43,245
Hey, brother.
207
00:09:43,745 --> 00:09:45,073
- You got my details?
- Yeah.
208
00:09:45,183 --> 00:09:46,479
[Richard] Lovely.
209
00:09:52,695 --> 00:09:53,721
[woman] Sorry, Sarah.
210
00:09:53,760 --> 00:09:56,050
Front desk say
Richard Thorncroft is here.
211
00:09:56,190 --> 00:09:57,734
Oh, Christ. I'm with Simon.
212
00:09:57,801 --> 00:09:59,346
Tell him to wait outside.
213
00:09:59,764 --> 00:10:01,940
Ah, Richard, darling. How are you?
214
00:10:02,081 --> 00:10:03,768
[woman] It's too late.
I couldn't stop him.
215
00:10:03,893 --> 00:10:05,453
[Richard] How am I? Well, let me think.
216
00:10:05,529 --> 00:10:09,354
I haven't had an audition in 18 months
and you get me a schizophrenic Yardie.
217
00:10:09,448 --> 00:10:10,814
Sounds like a good part to me.
218
00:10:10,880 --> 00:10:14,831
If you're a 60-year-old Jamaican man.
Sorry, Simon. I didn't realize it was you.
219
00:10:14,878 --> 00:10:16,425
- Hello. Hi.
- Big, big fan.
220
00:10:16,526 --> 00:10:18,378
Big fan. Caught your Equus in Chichester.
221
00:10:18,760 --> 00:10:20,667
- Powerful piece of work.
- Great. Thank you.
222
00:10:20,701 --> 00:10:23,010
And you were fantastic in, um...
223
00:10:23,199 --> 00:10:25,601
Um...
Oh, God, my memory's gone these days.
224
00:10:25,745 --> 00:10:27,815
- Uh, you were fantastic in it.
- Thank you.
225
00:10:27,979 --> 00:10:30,133
Sorry about the cock-up.
It was the new assistant.
226
00:10:30,242 --> 00:10:32,846
How could you mix me up with Crowthorne?
Do I not exist?
227
00:10:32,936 --> 00:10:34,300
No one seems to know who I am.
228
00:10:34,378 --> 00:10:36,589
Me and the Branster go way back.
I don't suppose you...
229
00:10:36,676 --> 00:10:39,753
Simon, sweetie,
could you just give us a few moments?
230
00:10:39,917 --> 00:10:41,211
I could have this salad.
231
00:10:41,277 --> 00:10:42,917
- Come back. Two minutes.
- Yes, yes.
232
00:10:45,315 --> 00:10:46,649
What the hell's going on?
233
00:10:46,716 --> 00:10:48,870
You're going through a transitional phase.
234
00:10:48,987 --> 00:10:50,565
You said that five years ago, Sarah.
235
00:10:50,653 --> 00:10:53,284
I mean, you're moving
from young, handsome hero
236
00:10:53,354 --> 00:10:56,092
- to older, still very handsome but not...
- Yes, yes.
237
00:10:56,159 --> 00:10:59,696
What's happening with my autobiography?
Are there any takers, any bites?
238
00:10:59,768 --> 00:11:01,986
[over comm] Very quiet time
for actors' autobiographies.
239
00:11:02,010 --> 00:11:04,801
Is it really? It's not very quiet
for Peter Easterman, is it?
240
00:11:04,868 --> 00:11:06,803
No, I don't think so. Volume three?
241
00:11:07,236 --> 00:11:09,510
What's this one called?
What I Did Yesterday?
242
00:11:09,909 --> 00:11:11,948
Windjammer's on its 16th season.
243
00:11:12,050 --> 00:11:13,743
- Season.
- He's built a franchise.
244
00:11:13,846 --> 00:11:16,776
He's even got his own range
of weatherproof clothing.
245
00:11:16,862 --> 00:11:19,167
I did not get into this business
to sell cagoules.
246
00:11:19,315 --> 00:11:21,073
You've gotta sell something, darling.
247
00:11:21,186 --> 00:11:22,542
Sell this. Hmm?
248
00:11:22,714 --> 00:11:25,889
This is a map of human emotion. Sell it.
249
00:11:25,955 --> 00:11:27,128
Nobody can, darling.
250
00:11:27,190 --> 00:11:28,276
You haven't got profile.
251
00:11:28,315 --> 00:11:30,792
That's why you made me do
the Thrombi-Sox ads.
252
00:11:30,846 --> 00:11:33,612
You said it would give me profile.
Thank God for Thrombi-Sox.
253
00:11:33,696 --> 00:11:35,893
And that is not a sentence
I thought I'd ever utter.
254
00:11:35,963 --> 00:11:37,971
Well, about Thrombi-Sox...
255
00:11:38,675 --> 00:11:40,995
- What?
- They've gone in a different direction.
256
00:11:41,128 --> 00:11:43,096
- [Richard] John fucking Nettles?
- [chuckles]
257
00:11:43,159 --> 00:11:45,294
Well, you told the director
he was an embryo.
258
00:11:45,361 --> 00:11:47,081
[Richard] He was... He's about 12.
259
00:11:47,198 --> 00:11:49,378
Sit down and calm down, come on.
260
00:11:49,869 --> 00:11:51,170
All is not lost.
261
00:11:51,300 --> 00:11:53,268
I had a very interesting
offer for you.
262
00:11:53,315 --> 00:11:54,409
An offer?
263
00:11:54,456 --> 00:11:55,815
From the police.
264
00:11:56,305 --> 00:11:59,057
- What do you mean?
- They want you to talk to a suspect
265
00:11:59,120 --> 00:12:01,581
and see if you can lure him into custody.
266
00:12:01,814 --> 00:12:04,401
What? So, this is a voiceover
or something?
267
00:12:04,706 --> 00:12:06,378
Yeah, a bit like a voiceover.
268
00:12:06,729 --> 00:12:09,118
- He thinks Mindhorn is a real detective.
- [Richard] What?
269
00:12:09,184 --> 00:12:10,542
Mindhorn, that was it.
270
00:12:10,604 --> 00:12:12,893
You were wonderful in that.
That was your Amadeus.
271
00:12:13,025 --> 00:12:14,961
Well, I mean, Amadeus was my Amadeus.
272
00:12:15,090 --> 00:12:16,495
[Richard] Yeah, fuck off, Callow.
273
00:12:16,550 --> 00:12:19,315
This is a private conversation
between me and my agent.
274
00:12:19,417 --> 00:12:21,096
Just calm down. Sit down.
275
00:12:21,163 --> 00:12:23,682
- I don't wanna sit down.
- Stand up, but calm down.
276
00:12:23,713 --> 00:12:24,713
I'll sit down.
277
00:12:25,252 --> 00:12:26,417
Sit down, then.
278
00:12:26,493 --> 00:12:29,619
Okay, so, let's focus
on this Mindhorn thing.
279
00:12:29,773 --> 00:12:31,074
I was bloody good in Mindhorn.
280
00:12:31,221 --> 00:12:34,831
You'll be even better now.
You've matured like a fine wine.
281
00:12:35,003 --> 00:12:37,190
- A man could get drunk on that wine.
- Great.
282
00:12:37,385 --> 00:12:39,848
So, you go to the Isle of Man,
you take the call...
283
00:12:39,915 --> 00:12:41,315
Sorry. Where?
284
00:12:41,378 --> 00:12:42,418
The Isle of Man.
285
00:12:42,484 --> 00:12:45,346
Uh, no. This isn't gonna work for me.
I do not go backwards.
286
00:12:45,432 --> 00:12:48,510
- My career, I move forwards. Like a shark.
- Like a shark, yes.
287
00:12:48,557 --> 00:12:51,643
But maybe going backwards
is the new going forwards.
288
00:12:51,814 --> 00:12:53,995
Why don't you hook up
with the old gang?
289
00:12:54,783 --> 00:12:57,534
Jeffrey Moncrief has got
his own PR firm now.
290
00:12:57,698 --> 00:13:00,479
Jeffrey Moncrief?
He went off the rails, I'm afraid.
291
00:13:00,817 --> 00:13:02,300
Looks kosher to me.
292
00:13:02,604 --> 00:13:04,973
You need all the publicity
you can get from this.
293
00:13:05,267 --> 00:13:07,667
What about Pat Deville, your old flame?
294
00:13:07,827 --> 00:13:09,370
Works for Manx TV now.
295
00:13:09,523 --> 00:13:11,192
Profile, Richard.
296
00:13:11,589 --> 00:13:15,089
Imagine, TV cop helps real cops
solve crime?
297
00:13:15,268 --> 00:13:17,307
It's PR gold. You'd be a hero.
298
00:13:17,557 --> 00:13:19,421
Do the interviews,
get in the newspapers,
299
00:13:19,488 --> 00:13:22,464
remind people who you are
and, bang, you're back on the map.
300
00:13:22,745 --> 00:13:25,964
Just play Mindhorn
one last time.
301
00:13:32,585 --> 00:13:33,835
Profile.
302
00:14:00,562 --> 00:14:02,140
[line ringing]
303
00:14:02,460 --> 00:14:04,140
[man over phone] Isle of Man constabulary.
304
00:14:04,362 --> 00:14:05,451
I'm in.
305
00:14:05,564 --> 00:14:06,702
Sorry, who is this?
306
00:14:06,938 --> 00:14:08,440
[foghorn blowing]
307
00:14:12,304 --> 00:14:16,178
[Moncrief over phone] Hello. Moncrief,
Public Relations International Limited.
308
00:14:16,320 --> 00:14:18,080
- Jeff.
- Richie.
309
00:14:18,636 --> 00:14:19,637
Are you here?
310
00:14:19,702 --> 00:14:23,118
Yeah, I'm here, two o'clock ferry,
like we said. Where are you?
311
00:14:23,242 --> 00:14:25,570
I'm working my butt off here for you,
Richie.
312
00:14:25,718 --> 00:14:27,689
Why don't I see you later
at the police station
313
00:14:27,846 --> 00:14:29,742
once I finish up here at the office?
314
00:14:29,812 --> 00:14:32,015
Okay. Sounds good.
What about the newspapers?
315
00:14:32,209 --> 00:14:35,486
The Manx Express loves it.
They're sending a photographer
316
00:14:35,531 --> 00:14:38,874
to get some shots of you doing the call
in the police station.
317
00:14:39,001 --> 00:14:43,156
Now, we've got to get to Pat at Manx TV
afore she knocks off.
318
00:14:43,273 --> 00:14:46,975
You know what, Jeff? I think I might have
time to squeeze that in before the gig.
319
00:14:47,054 --> 00:14:49,382
I bet you have, you devil.
320
00:14:49,499 --> 00:14:51,447
- [chuckles]
- Hey, come on.
321
00:14:51,585 --> 00:14:52,906
She's not married
322
00:14:53,005 --> 00:14:55,617
- and you're the thinking woman's crumpet.
- Ha, ha.
323
00:14:55,717 --> 00:14:56,717
Bye, Jeff.
324
00:14:57,689 --> 00:14:59,101
Ahoy there!
325
00:15:01,062 --> 00:15:04,367
This is the old stomping ground.
Back in the old wild oats-sowing days.
326
00:15:04,531 --> 00:15:06,531
[Green] Yeah, there's very good soil here,
I think.
327
00:15:06,884 --> 00:15:09,163
[man on TV] Welcome to the Isle of Man.
328
00:15:09,325 --> 00:15:10,560
Isle of adventure.
329
00:15:10,674 --> 00:15:11,843
Isle of romance.
330
00:15:12,281 --> 00:15:13,368
I'll have some of that.
331
00:15:13,435 --> 00:15:17,390
- Mr. Thorncroft, DS Baines.
- Enchanté. Call me Richard.
332
00:15:17,788 --> 00:15:20,375
PC Green and I
will be overseeing your stay here.
333
00:15:20,523 --> 00:15:22,671
- Roger that.
- We really appreciate this.
334
00:15:22,851 --> 00:15:25,476
- I know you're a busy man.
- I had to move things around.
335
00:15:25,663 --> 00:15:27,773
But work is work. This is more important.
336
00:15:28,248 --> 00:15:29,734
Let's save some lives.
337
00:15:30,592 --> 00:15:32,640
- This us?
- Yeah, yeah.
338
00:15:40,660 --> 00:15:41,718
Thanks.
339
00:15:43,879 --> 00:15:45,859
- You in? Great.
- Yeah, yeah, great.
340
00:15:47,992 --> 00:15:50,172
We believe Melly thought
Mindhorn was real.
341
00:15:50,239 --> 00:15:52,992
[Richard] Yeah, well, three years at RADA
give a man some skills.
342
00:15:53,017 --> 00:15:54,051
[Green] Right.
343
00:15:54,076 --> 00:15:56,211
- Are you a fan of the show?
- My mum liked it.
344
00:15:56,293 --> 00:15:58,585
Ah... A woman of taste. [chuckles]
345
00:15:59,045 --> 00:16:00,750
- She single?
- She's dead.
346
00:16:01,890 --> 00:16:04,523
This is you.
Uh, we'll give you a knock in 20 minutes.
347
00:16:05,053 --> 00:16:06,687
- Lovely.
- Stay in the room.
348
00:16:06,812 --> 00:16:09,558
- For your safety as much as anything else.
- Sure thing, big guy.
349
00:16:22,906 --> 00:16:25,085
- You gonna be there the whole time?
- Right, yeah.
350
00:16:25,141 --> 00:16:26,460
Yeah, good.
351
00:16:26,923 --> 00:16:28,125
Really good news.
352
00:16:28,570 --> 00:16:31,398
I'm gonna be doing some meditating,
so, um...
353
00:16:32,514 --> 00:16:34,054
- You meditate?
- No.
354
00:16:34,249 --> 00:16:36,257
- Something to think about.
- Thanks, I will.
355
00:16:36,371 --> 00:16:37,572
Sorry about your mum.
356
00:16:39,530 --> 00:16:40,530
Shit.
357
00:16:58,516 --> 00:16:59,619
Meeting someone.
358
00:16:59,739 --> 00:17:01,419
[Pat] I can't believe
she let you do that.
359
00:17:01,453 --> 00:17:03,133
- Not for the first time.
- [chuckles]
360
00:17:03,196 --> 00:17:04,369
[Pat] Any way download that footage
361
00:17:04,393 --> 00:17:06,555
just possible and get that sent
over straightaway.
362
00:17:06,703 --> 00:17:08,426
- [woman] Hello, Manx Television.
- [Richard] It's an offer or nothing.
363
00:17:08,450 --> 00:17:10,243
Just the way I play it, Jeremy.
364
00:17:10,688 --> 00:17:13,088
Bloody hell. I'll call you back.
365
00:17:13,555 --> 00:17:15,032
Patricia Deville.
366
00:17:16,224 --> 00:17:17,602
Don't tell me.
367
00:17:18,860 --> 00:17:20,555
- It's gone.
- You're joking, right?
368
00:17:20,672 --> 00:17:23,539
We did live together
for over two and a half years, so, um...
369
00:17:23,765 --> 00:17:25,602
- Yeah.
- Ha, ha. We certainly did.
370
00:17:25,789 --> 00:17:27,369
What are you doing here?
371
00:17:27,469 --> 00:17:29,204
Oh, you know, work, meetings.
372
00:17:29,271 --> 00:17:32,207
Busy, busy, busy. What about yourself?
What are you doing here?
373
00:17:32,274 --> 00:17:34,727
I'm a journalist now. I work here.
374
00:17:34,821 --> 00:17:37,179
Get out of town. [laughing]
375
00:17:37,329 --> 00:17:41,149
That's amazing. Actually, I might
just have a little something for you.
376
00:17:41,364 --> 00:17:42,594
Is it weed killer?
377
00:17:43,219 --> 00:17:44,620
- Hmm?
- You left our house
378
00:17:44,686 --> 00:17:48,890
to get some weed killer 24 years ago.
I haven't seen you since.
379
00:17:48,969 --> 00:17:51,766
- I see what you're doing.
- The weeds are really out of control now.
380
00:17:51,954 --> 00:17:54,730
[chuckles] I did explain my departure
in the letters.
381
00:17:54,796 --> 00:17:55,829
The letters?
382
00:17:55,899 --> 00:17:58,509
Yeah. The letters I wrote to you
and that you failed to respond to.
383
00:17:58,533 --> 00:18:00,402
[both laughing]
384
00:18:01,136 --> 00:18:03,538
- Let's not do this, shall we?
- Let's not even go there.
385
00:18:03,605 --> 00:18:07,242
Look. I'm only here for a couple of days,
I'm about to launch something fairly big.
386
00:18:07,309 --> 00:18:08,644
- Now, I was thinking...
- Right.
387
00:18:08,710 --> 00:18:12,414
You wanna use me for some publicity,
right? You need some profile, is that it?
388
00:18:12,481 --> 00:18:15,450
Way off, Pat. Um,
I can't talk about the details right now,
389
00:18:15,517 --> 00:18:18,657
but let's just say it's a fairly
interesting little acting job.
390
00:18:18,754 --> 00:18:21,508
Right.
I thought maybe you'd given up acting.
391
00:18:21,633 --> 00:18:23,953
You didn't catch me on the last season
of Midsomer Murders?
392
00:18:24,015 --> 00:18:25,950
That's what made me think
you'd given up.
393
00:18:26,033 --> 00:18:27,034
[chuckles]
394
00:18:27,368 --> 00:18:28,602
Pow! [chuckles]
395
00:18:28,730 --> 00:18:32,352
Ooh, you got me. Look at this.
Laughing and a-joking like old times.
396
00:18:32,574 --> 00:18:33,574
Gotta run.
397
00:18:33,802 --> 00:18:37,305
You'd be very foolish to walk away from
what I'm about to plonk down on the table.
398
00:18:37,440 --> 00:18:39,782
[laughing]
I'm a serious journalist now, Richard.
399
00:18:39,875 --> 00:18:42,852
Well, maybe catching
the psychotic killer Paul Melly
400
00:18:43,003 --> 00:18:45,180
isn't a serious enough story for you.
401
00:18:50,519 --> 00:18:53,321
There's a press gag on that case.
How do you know about it?
402
00:18:53,727 --> 00:18:58,393
Why don't we grab a bite
and I'll give you the full exposé.
403
00:18:58,639 --> 00:19:00,336
You mean exclusive.
404
00:19:00,642 --> 00:19:01,961
Whatever you say.
405
00:19:02,997 --> 00:19:04,243
Let's talk later.
406
00:19:04,513 --> 00:19:05,907
Let's do that.
407
00:19:13,102 --> 00:19:14,242
Still got it.
408
00:19:14,309 --> 00:19:15,309
[chuckles]
409
00:19:15,502 --> 00:19:16,502
Shit.
410
00:19:19,781 --> 00:19:21,483
[thud, then Richard grunts]
411
00:19:21,583 --> 00:19:23,112
- [Richard] Shit.
- Where is he?
412
00:19:23,185 --> 00:19:24,807
He said he was meditating.
413
00:19:26,822 --> 00:19:29,464
Went pretty deep.
Uh... Threw in a bit of capoeira.
414
00:19:30,003 --> 00:19:31,091
Right.
415
00:19:31,174 --> 00:19:33,268
[exhales] Let's nail this mother.
416
00:19:33,448 --> 00:19:34,635
Sorry.
417
00:19:35,837 --> 00:19:37,477
[Baines]
The suspect's name is Paul Melly.
418
00:19:37,574 --> 00:19:41,745
We think he might be using the island's
extensive mine system to evade capture.
419
00:19:41,885 --> 00:19:43,638
- Mine system? Clever bugger.
- [Baines] Mm.
420
00:19:43,772 --> 00:19:45,823
Do you recognize him, Richard?
421
00:19:46,742 --> 00:19:48,104
[Richard] Oh, my God.
422
00:19:48,380 --> 00:19:49,526
It's my agent.
423
00:19:49,750 --> 00:19:51,285
Only joking. [chuckles]
424
00:19:51,909 --> 00:19:54,260
Could I get an Americano with hot milk?
425
00:19:54,616 --> 00:19:57,956
So, the boy's parents were killed
in a car crash when he was nine.
426
00:19:58,042 --> 00:20:00,803
And, uh, when he was informed,
he was watching an episode of Mindhorn,
427
00:20:00,856 --> 00:20:04,259
so, he has developed
a sort of morbid obsession with the show.
428
00:20:04,359 --> 00:20:06,471
Could have been worse.
Could have been Windjammer.
429
00:20:06,661 --> 00:20:09,297
Yeah. Well, he is calling in 15 minutes,
Richard,
430
00:20:09,378 --> 00:20:12,367
and he's calling himself the Kestrel.
431
00:20:12,667 --> 00:20:16,018
Now, he might make
some sort of kestrel noises.
432
00:20:16,271 --> 00:20:19,237
Kestrel noises, good.
Look, I've got a couple of friends coming.
433
00:20:19,283 --> 00:20:20,721
I wonder if I could put a list
on reception.
434
00:20:20,745 --> 00:20:22,080
A list at reception?
435
00:20:22,222 --> 00:20:23,724
Yeah, Jeffrey Moncrief plus one.
436
00:20:23,845 --> 00:20:26,005
[Green] Richard,
this is Chief Inspector Derek Newsome.
437
00:20:26,047 --> 00:20:27,649
[Richard] Ah, the head Honcho.
438
00:20:27,716 --> 00:20:30,104
El Honcherino. The big cheese.
439
00:20:30,170 --> 00:20:32,440
- You look familiar. Did we golf?
- No.
440
00:20:32,517 --> 00:20:34,550
I wanted to talk to you
about the press conference.
441
00:20:34,574 --> 00:20:35,603
I'm... to... them.
442
00:20:35,628 --> 00:20:37,492
We could co-host,
but I'm camera trained,
443
00:20:37,559 --> 00:20:40,979
and sometimes in these things, police can
come across as weird and sweaty-looking.
444
00:20:41,065 --> 00:20:45,018
Mr. Thorncroft, you are aware
of the seriousness of the situation?
445
00:20:45,128 --> 00:20:47,903
Bigtime, yes, indeed.
We'll hash out the details of that later.
446
00:20:48,036 --> 00:20:50,005
- Is there a dressing room?
- This is a call.
447
00:20:50,214 --> 00:20:53,354
- You know how phones work.
- Don't know if you know how acting works.
448
00:20:53,389 --> 00:20:56,292
- Not really, and I'm not interested.
- We all have our process.
449
00:20:56,444 --> 00:20:59,748
Sometimes an item of clothing or footwear
can define a character.
450
00:20:59,815 --> 00:21:01,783
Uh, you have your costume, I have mine.
451
00:21:01,850 --> 00:21:03,752
[Newsome] This isn't a costume.
452
00:21:03,819 --> 00:21:07,522
This is officially sanctioned uniform
denoting rank and civic responsibility.
453
00:21:07,589 --> 00:21:10,826
It's still a kind of costume.
You put it on to play "the chief,"
454
00:21:10,892 --> 00:21:13,495
and then you take it off
when you go home to your wife,
455
00:21:13,554 --> 00:21:16,009
or maybe you don't. [chuckles]
456
00:21:16,190 --> 00:21:17,966
- All the world's a stage.
- No, it isn't.
457
00:21:18,033 --> 00:21:19,734
A young woman has been murdered
458
00:21:19,801 --> 00:21:23,104
and we're trying to catch her killer
before he does it again.
459
00:21:23,485 --> 00:21:25,768
- Okay.
- Do you wanna get changed through here?
460
00:21:26,981 --> 00:21:29,659
What's wrong with him?
Lost his truncheon?
461
00:21:31,434 --> 00:21:32,514
- Jeff.
- [Moncrief] Richie.
462
00:21:32,581 --> 00:21:35,307
The cops are being bloody stingy
with the door policy.
463
00:21:35,383 --> 00:21:37,452
- Ah, bastards.
- We're gonna have to get
464
00:21:37,519 --> 00:21:40,689
the photographer to take the photos
outside the building looking in.
465
00:21:40,932 --> 00:21:43,651
I'm on the first floor.
I'll favor the windows on the north side.
466
00:21:43,758 --> 00:21:45,213
North windows. Right, got it.
467
00:21:45,283 --> 00:21:46,283
Are you nearly here?
468
00:21:46,381 --> 00:21:51,182
Uh, I'm running a tad late, Richie.
I had to tidy up the Glendale account.
469
00:21:51,347 --> 00:21:53,415
Uh, will you speed things up there,
Barbara?
470
00:21:53,568 --> 00:21:56,821
You know, it's great to be heading back
to the big time with you, Richie.
471
00:21:56,846 --> 00:21:57,848
Wish me luck.
472
00:21:57,873 --> 00:22:00,575
Hey, you are going to be great, Richie.
473
00:22:00,755 --> 00:22:02,284
Tits and teeth, eh?
474
00:22:05,614 --> 00:22:07,133
Hello, old friend.
475
00:22:36,230 --> 00:22:37,846
- [Baines] Richard.
- Bainesy.
476
00:22:37,912 --> 00:22:41,230
When Melly calls, you need
to stay in character at all times.
477
00:22:41,315 --> 00:22:43,245
When I go in, I go deep.
478
00:22:43,564 --> 00:22:46,027
Ah, the old two-way mirrors.
I love these things.
479
00:22:47,182 --> 00:22:50,284
[Baines] Okay. Here's a list of prompts.
If you could stick to script, great.
480
00:22:50,308 --> 00:22:52,527
And avoid any of these,
you know, trigger words.
481
00:22:52,594 --> 00:22:56,631
Insane. Nutjob. Mental.
Blah, blah, blah, usual stuff.
482
00:22:56,698 --> 00:22:58,466
- This the phone?
- That is the phone.
483
00:22:58,533 --> 00:23:00,284
- Great.
- Yeah.
484
00:23:04,039 --> 00:23:05,136
Yeah.
485
00:23:06,608 --> 00:23:07,980
That's gonna be okay.
486
00:23:17,745 --> 00:23:21,824
- If you could just keep it in its cradle.
- Just connecting with the props.
487
00:23:22,027 --> 00:23:26,011
So, when he calls,
keep him on the line, keep him talking...
488
00:23:26,161 --> 00:23:27,855
- Mm-hm.
- Arrange to meet,
489
00:23:28,069 --> 00:23:29,550
and we'll take it from there.
490
00:23:30,105 --> 00:23:32,867
Here you go, Richard.
I couldn't find any manuka honey.
491
00:23:32,934 --> 00:23:35,503
- Oh. Two teabags, though?
- Yep, like you said.
492
00:23:35,570 --> 00:23:37,706
Good.
A little tip I picked up from Sean Bean.
493
00:23:38,042 --> 00:23:40,324
Double-bag Bean, we called him.
The Bean Bag.
494
00:23:40,495 --> 00:23:41,496
[chuckles]
495
00:23:41,618 --> 00:23:42,995
[phone ringing]
496
00:23:44,679 --> 00:23:45,679
This is it.
497
00:23:46,948 --> 00:23:48,238
[Richard] Shoes going on.
498
00:23:51,081 --> 00:23:52,249
Shoes on.
499
00:23:52,754 --> 00:23:54,155
[ringing continues]
500
00:23:54,522 --> 00:23:56,519
Yeah, whenever you're ready, Richard.
501
00:24:04,597 --> 00:24:05,659
[pops]
502
00:24:05,714 --> 00:24:07,502
[ringing continues]
503
00:24:07,669 --> 00:24:09,558
Yeah, whenever you're ready...
504
00:24:12,240 --> 00:24:14,159
Oh, Jesus. Answer it.
505
00:24:14,268 --> 00:24:15,469
Fucking clown.
506
00:24:15,549 --> 00:24:17,222
Mindhorn makes people wait.
507
00:24:17,910 --> 00:24:21,114
When they wait, they become angry.
When angry, they become vulnerable.
508
00:24:21,188 --> 00:24:23,855
When they're vulnerable,
they make mistakes.
509
00:24:24,491 --> 00:24:25,492
Yo, what's going down?
510
00:24:25,754 --> 00:24:26,921
[dial tone]
511
00:24:27,363 --> 00:24:29,636
Hello? Hello? He's hung up.
512
00:24:30,856 --> 00:24:33,222
You might wanna try 1471.
513
00:24:33,508 --> 00:24:34,847
[phone ringing]
514
00:24:34,959 --> 00:24:36,661
Yo, what's going down, Kestrel?
515
00:24:37,183 --> 00:24:38,863
[Melly on phone] Do you remember me?
516
00:24:38,941 --> 00:24:40,488
Course I do. What do you want, sir?
517
00:24:40,521 --> 00:24:42,402
I have something for you, Mindhorn.
518
00:24:42,570 --> 00:24:44,639
That's nice. Is it my birthday?
519
00:24:44,706 --> 00:24:46,674
Yes, yes, he's close,
maybe in a phone box.
520
00:24:46,741 --> 00:24:49,644
Because the only present
I'm interested in is the truth.
521
00:24:49,811 --> 00:24:53,948
And don't bother wrapping it,
because I don't care for pretty packaging.
522
00:24:54,183 --> 00:24:56,085
How do I know this is really you?
523
00:24:56,751 --> 00:25:01,545
How do I know it's really you, Kestrel,
not just some insane, mental nutjob?
524
00:25:02,085 --> 00:25:03,615
Why would you say that?
525
00:25:04,205 --> 00:25:05,205
I'm the Kestrel.
526
00:25:05,335 --> 00:25:07,228
[Melly squawking]
527
00:25:08,217 --> 00:25:09,697
More people are going to die.
528
00:25:09,764 --> 00:25:11,889
We're all gonna die, Kestrel.
Get over it.
529
00:25:12,186 --> 00:25:14,413
Some with a bang, some with a whimper.
530
00:25:14,669 --> 00:25:16,858
Some with a weird wasting disease.
531
00:25:17,105 --> 00:25:18,606
[Melly laughing]
532
00:25:18,897 --> 00:25:20,675
Aw. It really is you.
533
00:25:20,775 --> 00:25:24,335
Gold star, Kestrel. Now tell me something
I don't already bloody know.
534
00:25:24,828 --> 00:25:27,241
You want to catch Katya's killer,
don't you?
535
00:25:27,635 --> 00:25:29,570
Well, get this.
536
00:25:31,686 --> 00:25:35,223
- What's that? Is there anyone else there?
- Negative, sir. Mindhorn works alone.
537
00:25:35,290 --> 00:25:39,093
Listen, big guy, why don't we grab some
face-to-face time and sort this baby out?
538
00:25:39,167 --> 00:25:41,503
- Where you calling from?
- No, it's not safe.
539
00:25:41,580 --> 00:25:43,916
The piggies are listening.
You know the quarry?
540
00:25:44,032 --> 00:25:45,635
- Course I know.
- Good.
541
00:25:45,710 --> 00:25:47,908
- I'll meet you outside.
- See you there.
542
00:25:48,002 --> 00:25:49,838
- Come alone.
- I always do.
543
00:25:50,113 --> 00:25:52,049
- Which quarry?
- No idea. You get a trace?
544
00:25:52,135 --> 00:25:53,808
- No.
- What kind of an outfit is this?
545
00:25:53,875 --> 00:25:55,697
That is a rookie mistake.
546
00:25:56,110 --> 00:25:57,110
Hey.
547
00:25:57,400 --> 00:26:00,215
You were meant to keep him on the line.
548
00:26:00,281 --> 00:26:02,103
That's not the way
the scene played there.
549
00:26:02,207 --> 00:26:03,842
There's the quarry at Vazon Edge.
550
00:26:04,025 --> 00:26:05,825
That's where we used to do
all our car chases.
551
00:26:05,877 --> 00:26:08,971
In the... that's where he'll be.
Go get him, team.
552
00:26:09,695 --> 00:26:10,695
Prick.
553
00:26:11,226 --> 00:26:12,360
[Richard] Oh, dear.
554
00:26:12,918 --> 00:26:14,322
Someone's not a happy bunny.
555
00:26:14,624 --> 00:26:18,861
I remember him now. It was his wife I used
to play golf with. If you catch my drift.
556
00:26:19,133 --> 00:26:20,133
[laughing]
557
00:26:20,635 --> 00:26:21,760
Hole in one.
558
00:26:22,128 --> 00:26:23,338
Didn't think he knew.
559
00:26:23,404 --> 00:26:24,404
Uh...
560
00:26:24,639 --> 00:26:26,480
Why do you think
Melly said outside the quarry?
561
00:26:26,536 --> 00:26:27,619
- [cell phone beeps]
- Hmm?
562
00:26:28,076 --> 00:26:31,646
[Green] Do you think quarry meant
something different on Mindhorn?
563
00:26:31,813 --> 00:26:34,681
A quarry's a quarry, Green.
I wouldn't overthink these things.
564
00:26:34,869 --> 00:26:37,111
Just gonna go and drain the python.
565
00:26:37,385 --> 00:26:40,002
Then we can have a natter
about the press conference.
566
00:26:40,388 --> 00:26:41,856
[police sirens wailing]
567
00:26:42,190 --> 00:26:44,955
[man] ETA to Vazon Edge quarry
four minutes.
568
00:26:53,331 --> 00:26:56,968
All cars, all cars, the quarry is
the police station. Melly is here. Over.
569
00:26:57,251 --> 00:26:59,447
[man] Roger that. Diverting.
570
00:26:59,874 --> 00:27:02,353
Turn around. Do it now!
571
00:27:02,777 --> 00:27:03,912
[woman] What are you doing?
572
00:27:04,078 --> 00:27:06,714
[man] Move the fucking van, you prick!
573
00:27:07,475 --> 00:27:08,783
Richard.
574
00:27:20,228 --> 00:27:22,964
Thorncroft's gone.
I repeat, I've lost eyes on Thorncroft.
575
00:27:23,031 --> 00:27:25,423
Thorncroft has gone. Shit.
576
00:27:26,087 --> 00:27:28,303
You got the action shots
through the window.
577
00:27:28,369 --> 00:27:31,072
- Why don't we get something more dramatic?
- Good plan.
578
00:27:31,839 --> 00:27:35,558
[Green] Thorncroft may be in danger.
The suspect was outside the station.
579
00:27:35,944 --> 00:27:37,449
Might be a great backdrop.
580
00:27:37,589 --> 00:27:40,081
I'll be here.
Obviously, I'll pull this in on the day.
581
00:27:40,152 --> 00:27:41,182
Good to go.
582
00:27:41,378 --> 00:27:44,852
Your face has... fallen down.
It's all baggy.
583
00:27:45,036 --> 00:27:48,581
Yeah, do you mind? Uh, we all age.
Use some backlight, soften the focus.
584
00:27:48,738 --> 00:27:50,870
I'm not gonna tell you your job. Jesus.
585
00:27:51,259 --> 00:27:53,328
- Jeff?
- [Moncrief] Richie, where are you?
586
00:27:53,394 --> 00:27:56,503
I'm with the photographer,
and he's a bit weird. Where are you?
587
00:27:56,628 --> 00:27:59,133
I'm with the photographer.
Outside the station.
588
00:27:59,200 --> 00:28:01,202
Hey, you must have made
quite an impression.
589
00:28:01,269 --> 00:28:04,238
There's police running about
like headless chickens.
590
00:28:04,305 --> 00:28:06,269
[squawking]
591
00:28:06,808 --> 00:28:09,081
Are you celebrating already. Richie?
592
00:28:10,812 --> 00:28:13,314
Clever Mindhorn.
593
00:28:13,833 --> 00:28:15,613
It's time.
594
00:28:17,018 --> 00:28:21,331
Time for the apocalypse of justice.
595
00:28:23,491 --> 00:28:25,059
[shouting]
596
00:28:27,161 --> 00:28:28,396
[thud, then Richard grunts]
597
00:28:28,463 --> 00:28:30,507
[Richard groaning]
598
00:28:40,177 --> 00:28:41,507
Mindhorn.
599
00:28:41,909 --> 00:28:43,523
Please, no.
600
00:28:43,612 --> 00:28:45,343
Look into my eyes.
601
00:28:47,248 --> 00:28:50,038
- Can you see the truth?
- Yeah.
602
00:28:50,121 --> 00:28:53,291
Did you receive the evidence
I sent to your house?
603
00:28:53,421 --> 00:28:56,057
- Yes, definitely.
- You did?
604
00:28:56,229 --> 00:28:57,859
Then you know I'm innocent!
605
00:28:57,925 --> 00:28:59,360
- Are you on the case?
- Yes.
606
00:28:59,427 --> 00:29:00,511
- Yeah?
- Yes, sir.
607
00:29:00,557 --> 00:29:01,605
Yeah. Yeah!
608
00:29:01,654 --> 00:29:03,081
[screaming]
609
00:29:08,262 --> 00:29:09,929
It's pretend, see?
610
00:29:09,954 --> 00:29:12,289
Melly, step away from the actor!
611
00:29:12,840 --> 00:29:15,666
- [Baines] Stay down, Richard!
- See you at the wheel, Mindhorn.
612
00:29:16,427 --> 00:29:18,804
Shoot him. Shoot him in the head!
613
00:29:19,009 --> 00:29:21,418
[taser buzzing, Melly grunting]
614
00:29:25,324 --> 00:29:26,574
[thud]
615
00:29:30,213 --> 00:29:34,666
My next guest is a celebrated actor
and now an award-winning writer.
616
00:29:34,691 --> 00:29:35,461
[audience applauds]
617
00:29:35,486 --> 00:29:37,728
Richard Thorncroft,
welcome to the show.
618
00:29:38,199 --> 00:29:39,408
Hello.
619
00:29:39,705 --> 00:29:43,371
So, you finished your book,
which is not only deeply entertaining,
620
00:29:43,541 --> 00:29:47,103
it is also the first actor's autobiography
to be nominated for a Booker Prize.
621
00:29:47,173 --> 00:29:48,250
[audience cheering]
622
00:29:48,309 --> 00:29:51,127
You've embarked on a new production
of Hamlet with Kenneth Branagh.
623
00:29:51,285 --> 00:29:52,838
All after becoming a hero
624
00:29:52,947 --> 00:29:55,845
by making this island safe
for vulnerable women like myself.
625
00:29:55,983 --> 00:29:57,452
- You're welcome.
- Thank you.
626
00:29:57,518 --> 00:29:58,650
[audience applauding]
627
00:29:58,759 --> 00:30:01,728
After the shock of the accident,
all your hair grew back.
628
00:30:01,809 --> 00:30:05,012
Yes, it's a medical phenomenon
known as follicle neogenesis.
629
00:30:05,193 --> 00:30:09,263
And conversely, when I heard
about the accident, all my hair fell out.
630
00:30:09,408 --> 00:30:12,705
Thanks, Ken, but we're talking
about Richard at the moment.
631
00:30:12,788 --> 00:30:14,611
Oh, I'm so sorry. Sorry. Sorry, Rich.
632
00:30:14,676 --> 00:30:15,908
No probs, Ken.
633
00:30:16,185 --> 00:30:17,502
[Kenneth] Okay.
634
00:30:17,972 --> 00:30:19,064
May I?
635
00:30:19,351 --> 00:30:21,080
- [crowd] Ooh...
- Fill your boots.
636
00:30:21,772 --> 00:30:23,174
Mm. That's it.
637
00:30:23,338 --> 00:30:24,355
[audience whistling and cheering]
638
00:30:24,379 --> 00:30:25,814
Don't be afraid.
639
00:30:26,147 --> 00:30:31,735
With that audition, he changed the way
that people think about making art.
640
00:30:32,308 --> 00:30:34,508
Politically,
I think he's become very important.
641
00:30:34,585 --> 00:30:36,868
For me, there is no one else.
642
00:30:37,057 --> 00:30:39,126
- Like Mandela,
- Richard.
643
00:30:39,293 --> 00:30:41,907
Ben Kingsley,
and then there is Richard.
644
00:30:41,968 --> 00:30:43,157
Richard...
645
00:30:43,234 --> 00:30:46,963
[in deep voice] I am going to give you
the best Manx Day you've ever had.
646
00:30:47,101 --> 00:30:48,383
[shouts]
647
00:30:48,536 --> 00:30:53,219
Of course, the parade is at the heart
of Manx Day, always has been,
648
00:30:53,391 --> 00:30:55,665
always will be, but this...
649
00:30:57,844 --> 00:31:00,071
[EKG beeping]
650
00:31:04,152 --> 00:31:07,054
- Richie, baby.
- Jeffrey Moncrief.
651
00:31:07,121 --> 00:31:09,547
- Good to see you.
- [laughing]
652
00:31:10,235 --> 00:31:13,127
Look at you.
The years have treated you well.
653
00:31:13,152 --> 00:31:14,019
You, too.
654
00:31:14,128 --> 00:31:16,130
Ah. Don't lie. I'm a fucking wreck.
655
00:31:16,230 --> 00:31:17,827
- But who cares, eh?
- That's right.
656
00:31:17,852 --> 00:31:20,665
You did it. They got him.
You're a hero.
657
00:31:20,821 --> 00:31:23,137
I don't think you can smoke
in hospitals, Jeff.
658
00:31:23,204 --> 00:31:24,243
Since when?
659
00:31:24,313 --> 00:31:25,391
Since the '50s?
660
00:31:25,454 --> 00:31:28,709
- Oh, right. How did it go with Pat?
- Ha, ha. Oh, very well, actually, yeah.
661
00:31:28,976 --> 00:31:31,836
- I think we might just be in there.
- I bet you are.
662
00:31:32,211 --> 00:31:33,581
- Str... Strictly business.
- Oh!
663
00:31:33,797 --> 00:31:36,584
Good, 'cause when your heroics
hit the front page,
664
00:31:36,651 --> 00:31:38,719
you'll have minge coming out your arse.
665
00:31:39,235 --> 00:31:40,254
Ah, lovely.
666
00:31:40,321 --> 00:31:41,875
You remember these guys?
667
00:31:42,323 --> 00:31:44,586
Nutmeg, the druid detective.
668
00:31:44,922 --> 00:31:48,563
Moonshaft.
He's blind, he's black and he's back.
669
00:31:48,629 --> 00:31:49,657
They're out on DVD?
670
00:31:49,730 --> 00:31:52,866
Ten grand apiece they got.
And they were shite.
671
00:31:52,922 --> 00:31:56,192
Mindhorn had a metal eye
that could see the truth.
672
00:31:56,282 --> 00:31:58,985
What did Nutmeg have?
Some fucking joss sticks?
673
00:31:59,273 --> 00:32:00,441
This is interesting, Jeff.
674
00:32:00,541 --> 00:32:03,244
Aye, and Pete thinks so, too.
675
00:32:03,430 --> 00:32:07,048
He even wants to release it
through his production company.
676
00:32:07,219 --> 00:32:08,368
Pete Easterman?
677
00:32:08,438 --> 00:32:09,704
The Windjammer himself.
678
00:32:09,762 --> 00:32:11,594
- Ah, mm... This is a bad idea.
- Why?
679
00:32:11,672 --> 00:32:13,985
Pete and I have a history.
Things have been said.
680
00:32:14,053 --> 00:32:16,633
No-No-No, that's all
water under the bridge.
681
00:32:16,805 --> 00:32:19,672
Pete insisted you come to his country club
this evening.
682
00:32:19,844 --> 00:32:21,529
He wants to make it happen.
683
00:32:21,680 --> 00:32:25,133
Mindhorn series one to three on DVD.
684
00:32:25,321 --> 00:32:28,055
How do you like those apples?
685
00:32:28,269 --> 00:32:30,016
This is actually a bloody good idea.
686
00:32:30,113 --> 00:32:32,016
[chuckles] I told you.
687
00:32:32,144 --> 00:32:35,258
Lovely. Seven o'clock, Jammers Club.
688
00:32:35,407 --> 00:32:37,245
Lock up your pussy!
689
00:32:37,383 --> 00:32:40,618
- The Wolf Pack is back on the prowl.
- [laughing]
690
00:32:40,735 --> 00:32:42,116
- It's a hospital, Jeff.
- Aye?
691
00:32:42,183 --> 00:32:43,266
Keep it down a little bit.
692
00:32:43,415 --> 00:32:45,052
Flange ahoy, Richie.
693
00:32:45,319 --> 00:32:46,587
Flange ahoy.
694
00:32:46,654 --> 00:32:47,977
Yes indeed.
695
00:32:49,041 --> 00:32:51,922
[Pat on TV]
More on that unfolding tragedy later.
696
00:32:52,868 --> 00:32:55,907
Why does the Manx cat have no tail?
697
00:32:56,130 --> 00:32:59,805
Some say they swam ashore
during a shipwreck in the 16th century.
698
00:32:59,946 --> 00:33:02,125
Others say it's a genetic mutation...
699
00:33:06,274 --> 00:33:07,422
Chekhov?
700
00:33:08,309 --> 00:33:09,524
Chekhov?
701
00:33:10,003 --> 00:33:11,471
[cell phone ringing]
702
00:33:13,799 --> 00:33:15,680
- Hello?
- Hello, you.
703
00:33:16,309 --> 00:33:17,829
- Hello, Richard.
- Hello.
704
00:33:17,952 --> 00:33:20,688
So, you're still at the Heights.
705
00:33:21,106 --> 00:33:23,258
Yes, that's a good guess.
706
00:33:23,618 --> 00:33:25,459
So, I hear they caught Melly.
707
00:33:25,526 --> 00:33:27,128
Yeah. I put him out of action.
708
00:33:27,295 --> 00:33:29,630
That lunatic won't be troubling the women
no more.
709
00:33:29,697 --> 00:33:30,697
[Pat] Quite a story.
710
00:33:30,887 --> 00:33:32,404
[Richard] I like to think so.
711
00:33:32,500 --> 00:33:35,136
Richard Thorncroft does something
for somebody else.
712
00:33:35,326 --> 00:33:37,271
Pow. I walked into that.
713
00:33:37,685 --> 00:33:38,943
Where are you at the moment?
714
00:33:38,999 --> 00:33:40,537
Oh, I'm staying at the Grand.
715
00:33:40,641 --> 00:33:43,584
Well, that's where they've put me up,
anyway, you know. Uh...
716
00:33:43,874 --> 00:33:45,138
For my sins.
717
00:33:45,379 --> 00:33:48,182
It's nice, you know, a little, uh, suite.
718
00:33:48,249 --> 00:33:49,617
One of those little suites.
719
00:33:50,318 --> 00:33:51,318
Oh!
720
00:33:51,419 --> 00:33:54,088
Sorry. Just slipped on a breakfast tray.
721
00:33:54,155 --> 00:33:55,556
[chuckles] Bloody room service.
722
00:33:56,490 --> 00:34:00,528
Yeah, I mean, who'd have thought, hey,
you and I would have ended up drifting
723
00:34:00,595 --> 00:34:03,269
like two lonely boats on the sea of life?
724
00:34:04,460 --> 00:34:07,780
Just two boats who crossed once before
725
00:34:07,967 --> 00:34:10,608
and are now crossing again
on the return charter,
726
00:34:10,809 --> 00:34:14,217
looking for that safe harbor,
that magical other person,
727
00:34:14,366 --> 00:34:17,505
and sometimes that other person
can be staring you right in the face
728
00:34:17,624 --> 00:34:19,895
- and you never even realized it.
- Hey, Richie.
729
00:34:21,911 --> 00:34:24,418
- Clive.
- Wow. [chuckling]
730
00:34:24,485 --> 00:34:25,590
Clive.
731
00:34:25,622 --> 00:34:27,488
- It's good to see you.
- So good to see you.
732
00:34:27,555 --> 00:34:29,630
What are you doing in my garden, man?
733
00:34:29,683 --> 00:34:31,384
What are you doing in the garden?
734
00:34:31,444 --> 00:34:33,083
- Well, I live here.
- Yeah.
735
00:34:33,194 --> 00:34:35,129
What? What, in the garden?
736
00:34:35,196 --> 00:34:38,333
- No, silly. I live here with Pat.
- [chuckles]
737
00:34:38,442 --> 00:34:41,255
We've been together
for many, many years now since you left.
738
00:34:41,372 --> 00:34:42,676
- You know that, right?
- Yeah.
739
00:34:42,778 --> 00:34:45,640
- Yeah. Yes, I do. That's old news. Joke.
- You're joking with me.
740
00:34:45,706 --> 00:34:49,762
Oh, wow.
So, what are you doing in the garden?
741
00:34:49,917 --> 00:34:51,137
Yeah.
742
00:34:51,825 --> 00:34:55,349
Just, uh, coming to get some fan mail.
I popped round to get fan mail.
743
00:34:55,481 --> 00:34:57,684
- We get that.
- Yeah, so I thought I'd swing by...
744
00:34:57,770 --> 00:34:59,372
So, what's with the flowers?
745
00:34:59,620 --> 00:35:02,256
- I've got a funeral later to do, so...
- That's sad.
746
00:35:02,323 --> 00:35:04,465
- I guess you're at that age now.
- Yeah, sad.
747
00:35:04,520 --> 00:35:06,594
- Anyone I know?
- John Nettles.
748
00:35:06,661 --> 00:35:09,263
- John Nettles? I know John really well.
- Yeah, not...
749
00:35:09,330 --> 00:35:12,400
- No. Not that John Nettles. Another one.
- Okay. That's a relief.
750
00:35:12,466 --> 00:35:14,468
- Yep.
- Come in. My God, come in.
751
00:35:14,535 --> 00:35:16,537
- Pat's gonna love to see you.
- Yeah.
752
00:35:16,604 --> 00:35:17,772
Everyone wants to see you.
753
00:35:17,838 --> 00:35:19,540
- It's very nice of you.
- Come on in.
754
00:35:19,607 --> 00:35:20,875
- Everyone?
- Yeah.
755
00:35:20,941 --> 00:35:24,445
- Can I have the keys to the Range Rover?
- Hey, Jasmine, look who it is.
756
00:35:24,612 --> 00:35:26,348
- Hi.
- It's Mindhorn.
757
00:35:26,535 --> 00:35:27,790
[Richard] Hello.
758
00:35:27,848 --> 00:35:30,451
I used to be this guy's stunt man.
Can you believe it?
759
00:35:30,518 --> 00:35:32,186
Look at him now. Look at this.
760
00:35:32,301 --> 00:35:33,458
What is this you have here?
761
00:35:33,572 --> 00:35:37,209
- Well, that's called living the high life.
- Yeah? Too many biscuits?
762
00:35:37,409 --> 00:35:40,245
- Champagne, you know. Other stuff...
- Too many garibaldis.
763
00:35:40,327 --> 00:35:41,862
Steak and rich cheese.
764
00:35:41,929 --> 00:35:44,989
At least he covers himself up.
Can you put some trousers on?
765
00:35:45,075 --> 00:35:48,989
She's joking. She's very funny.
She has her mother's tongue, you know?
766
00:35:50,604 --> 00:35:51,639
Richard Thorncroft?
767
00:35:51,706 --> 00:35:53,541
[Clive] Yeah, look at him. There he is.
768
00:35:53,741 --> 00:35:56,510
- Yeah, I've heard a lot about you.
- Oh. All of it good, I hope?
769
00:35:57,202 --> 00:35:59,271
[Clive] Oh! Watch out.
770
00:35:59,296 --> 00:36:00,314
[both laughing]
771
00:36:00,381 --> 00:36:05,786
This guy, okay, this guy used to make me
tell everybody he did his own stunts.
772
00:36:05,853 --> 00:36:08,923
- Well, I did a few of my own stunts.
- No, no, you naughty liar.
773
00:36:08,989 --> 00:36:10,624
- That's not lying.
- You never did.
774
00:36:10,691 --> 00:36:13,094
- You never did any, you naughty boy.
- I did some.
775
00:36:13,164 --> 00:36:15,320
- No. He couldn't even drive a car.
- Come on.
776
00:36:15,345 --> 00:36:16,506
[Richard] But now I have passed.
777
00:36:16,530 --> 00:36:20,180
Well, I'd love to stay here and watch you
two verbally sparring, but I have to go.
778
00:36:20,332 --> 00:36:21,813
Mum, are you ready?
779
00:36:22,670 --> 00:36:25,439
Hey, Pat, look what I found
in the garden.
780
00:36:25,539 --> 00:36:27,441
It's a Richard Thorncroft tree.
781
00:36:27,508 --> 00:36:29,910
I cut him down
and brought him in the house.
782
00:36:29,977 --> 00:36:31,278
[Richard & Clive laughing]
783
00:36:31,345 --> 00:36:32,719
- Richard.
- [Richard] Hello.
784
00:36:32,805 --> 00:36:34,982
What are you doing?
You said you were at the Grand.
785
00:36:35,178 --> 00:36:37,734
Oh, I can answer that.
He's, uh, come for some fan mail.
786
00:36:37,891 --> 00:36:40,703
You're getting your fan mail?
Oh. I'm really touched.
787
00:36:40,813 --> 00:36:44,055
Yeah, there's some in the garage.
I'll go and fetch it for you.
788
00:36:44,670 --> 00:36:47,973
Oh! Don't go getting back together.
I'm kidding. Look at him.
789
00:36:48,083 --> 00:36:50,063
- He's so fat now. He's a mess.
- [chuckles]
790
00:36:50,188 --> 00:36:51,844
[Richard] Oh, he's great.
791
00:36:53,033 --> 00:36:54,274
Um...
792
00:36:55,901 --> 00:36:57,068
Clive.
793
00:36:57,705 --> 00:36:58,875
Clive.
794
00:36:59,340 --> 00:37:00,741
Clive. Mm.
795
00:37:00,808 --> 00:37:03,265
- You wanna talk about Clive?
- I don't want to talk about Clive now.
796
00:37:03,289 --> 00:37:05,880
No, no. I mean, obviously,
he's a great bloke, lovely bloke.
797
00:37:05,946 --> 00:37:07,381
Uh... Great choice.
798
00:37:07,448 --> 00:37:09,550
Look, I think, uh, I might scoot.
799
00:37:09,617 --> 00:37:12,609
- And we should do that interview, though.
- Sure.
800
00:37:12,758 --> 00:37:15,789
Why don't you, um, pop round to Manx TV
tomorrow?
801
00:37:16,244 --> 00:37:17,484
Okay.
802
00:37:22,117 --> 00:37:24,078
- See you.
- You're going the wrong way.
803
00:37:24,221 --> 00:37:25,274
Yeah.
804
00:37:26,941 --> 00:37:28,188
[Clive] Oh, hey, Richie.
805
00:37:28,274 --> 00:37:30,547
I wanna show you something.
You're gonna like it.
806
00:37:30,649 --> 00:37:34,320
- [Richard] I've gotta get to this funeral.
- No. Hey, look at this. Huh?
807
00:37:36,280 --> 00:37:38,349
- Memories, huh?
- Yes, sir.
808
00:37:38,479 --> 00:37:42,038
You know, when I found her, she was
on the scrap heap. Can you believe that?
809
00:37:42,455 --> 00:37:43,850
She was pretty busted up.
810
00:37:44,205 --> 00:37:46,663
One careless owner.
811
00:37:47,429 --> 00:37:49,850
But then I brought her here, fixed her up,
812
00:37:49,921 --> 00:37:52,326
gave her all the love, care,
and attention she needed
813
00:37:52,393 --> 00:37:55,405
and now she goes like a dream.
814
00:37:55,896 --> 00:38:00,858
Take her out for a ride every single day.
815
00:38:02,036 --> 00:38:05,100
And then I fixed up the car.
816
00:38:08,475 --> 00:38:09,743
I was talking about Pat.
817
00:38:09,810 --> 00:38:10,810
Yeah.
818
00:38:11,078 --> 00:38:12,746
- Not the car.
- Mm-hm. Got it.
819
00:38:12,905 --> 00:38:15,553
- Double meaning type thing. I was...
- Very good.
820
00:38:15,716 --> 00:38:16,990
- Being funny.
- Yes.
821
00:38:17,212 --> 00:38:18,412
But you didn't laugh.
822
00:38:18,686 --> 00:38:19,928
No, I'll laugh later.
823
00:38:19,983 --> 00:38:20,988
That's okay.
824
00:38:21,055 --> 00:38:22,356
[both chuckling]
825
00:38:22,423 --> 00:38:25,459
- Well, thank you for the joke.
- No, no, come get your fan mail.
826
00:38:25,860 --> 00:38:27,828
- It's just through here. Come on.
- Right.
827
00:38:28,062 --> 00:38:30,269
- Yeah, step into my office.
- Okay.
828
00:38:30,426 --> 00:38:34,089
Uh, wow. I didn't realize the show
was so popular. You get so many letters.
829
00:38:34,198 --> 00:38:37,191
Yeah, over the years
it's acquired a certain cachet.
830
00:38:38,697 --> 00:38:40,128
[groans]
831
00:38:40,814 --> 00:38:42,159
Ah.
832
00:38:44,411 --> 00:38:46,464
You want me to call a man with a van?
833
00:38:46,576 --> 00:38:48,464
- Very... Very witty.
- Yeah.
834
00:38:48,550 --> 00:38:49,817
- Yeah.
- I did two jokes.
835
00:38:49,884 --> 00:38:51,870
One over there and then one just now.
836
00:38:51,931 --> 00:38:54,651
- I see you're very proud of yourself.
- A little bit.
837
00:38:54,722 --> 00:38:56,034
You know what you are?
838
00:38:56,163 --> 00:38:58,675
You are my stuntman.
That's all you'll ever be.
839
00:38:58,759 --> 00:39:01,695
- Yeah, it's my job, though, so...
- What, to be my stand-in?
840
00:39:01,762 --> 00:39:04,253
I'm a stand-in when people
can't do things physically.
841
00:39:04,361 --> 00:39:06,034
That's when they call me. You know?
842
00:39:06,112 --> 00:39:08,112
I'm at the top of my physical game, sir.
843
00:39:08,448 --> 00:39:10,573
You're hiding it really well these days.
844
00:39:10,667 --> 00:39:12,640
Yeah? Don't make me release the Ginga.
845
00:39:12,706 --> 00:39:15,542
Ginga? You're going to play
giant wooden blocks with me?
846
00:39:15,609 --> 00:39:17,941
Ginga, not Jenga. It's a capoeira term.
847
00:39:18,029 --> 00:39:19,316
It could get messy, sir.
848
00:39:19,955 --> 00:39:22,956
Enjoy reading the fan mail.
Don't read it all at once.
849
00:39:25,271 --> 00:39:26,906
You forgot your flowers.
850
00:39:28,795 --> 00:39:30,276
Oh, sweet.
851
00:39:32,089 --> 00:39:34,591
Hey, baby, I got you some flowers.
852
00:39:35,562 --> 00:39:38,065
- Thanks.
- Yeah, you know, just to say good luck
853
00:39:38,132 --> 00:39:41,167
- with the golf and...
- "It's time to get some pussy"?
854
00:39:44,397 --> 00:39:47,308
Well... it's been a while.
855
00:39:47,875 --> 00:39:51,198
- I'm gonna play golf.
- I'm gonna do some gardening.
856
00:39:54,916 --> 00:39:56,956
- Oh! It's nice.
- Thanks.
857
00:40:01,372 --> 00:40:02,862
[Moncrief] Do you fancy a toot?
858
00:40:02,973 --> 00:40:06,005
I'm gonna say no to that, Jeff,
actually, in public especially
859
00:40:06,075 --> 00:40:08,970
because, uh, I had to give that up
due to adverse chemical reactions.
860
00:40:09,029 --> 00:40:11,856
- [shouts] Let's make some fucking deals.
- Yes, let's do that.
861
00:40:11,903 --> 00:40:14,060
Listen, I might take a lead
when we get in there.
862
00:40:14,134 --> 00:40:16,049
Do the talking.
You could perhaps hang back.
863
00:40:16,088 --> 00:40:18,424
- Me? No. I'm not going in any way.
- You're not going in?
864
00:40:18,505 --> 00:40:21,475
- No, I'm barred.
- Oh! You didn't mention that either.
865
00:40:21,542 --> 00:40:22,943
- It's a long story.
- Okay, Jeff.
866
00:40:22,986 --> 00:40:24,754
- All right. I'll see you after.
- See you later.
867
00:40:24,778 --> 00:40:27,213
- Still got some stuff...
- Right. Ahem.
868
00:40:29,377 --> 00:40:30,517
[woman] Hello, sir.
869
00:40:30,747 --> 00:40:33,971
♪♪ Jazz music playing over speakers...
870
00:40:34,096 --> 00:40:37,260
♪♪
871
00:40:37,523 --> 00:40:39,112
- [man 1] You like...?
- [man 2] Yes...
872
00:40:40,845 --> 00:40:42,727
[chuckles] What a twat.
873
00:40:44,733 --> 00:40:46,619
Richard Horncroft.
874
00:40:47,768 --> 00:40:49,143
The beast-man.
875
00:40:49,326 --> 00:40:51,924
Be careful, ladies.
This guy is a real live wire.
876
00:40:52,072 --> 00:40:53,907
- Dangerous to know.
- [chuckles]
877
00:40:53,932 --> 00:40:55,185
[mimics shooting bow and arrow]
878
00:40:55,209 --> 00:40:57,143
- Twang!
- Oof!
879
00:40:57,447 --> 00:40:58,651
Hmm!
880
00:40:58,812 --> 00:41:00,180
- [Richard chuckles]
- Ah.
881
00:41:00,674 --> 00:41:02,549
What you been doing?
Where you been hiding?
882
00:41:02,666 --> 00:41:04,291
Inside a busy schedule.
883
00:41:04,651 --> 00:41:06,877
- Really?
- Mm. Ha, ha.
884
00:41:07,260 --> 00:41:09,590
- How am I looking?
- You're looking good.
885
00:41:09,656 --> 00:41:10,657
Yeah, I know.
886
00:41:10,724 --> 00:41:14,695
So, a little dick bird tells me you've got
an idea floating around in the old bonsai.
887
00:41:14,762 --> 00:41:18,766
Mm, I certainly do. The heat I'm about to
generate off the back of the police thing
888
00:41:18,893 --> 00:41:22,822
I think could be funneled through
into a DVD release.
889
00:41:22,940 --> 00:41:24,940
- That's where you come in.
- That's a sweet angle.
890
00:41:25,041 --> 00:41:28,760
I think so, too. So, what do you think?
Are we in business on this?
891
00:41:32,698 --> 00:41:35,307
I say yeah, let's do it, let's sign.
892
00:41:35,822 --> 00:41:36,883
All right.
893
00:41:36,949 --> 00:41:38,084
[laughing]
894
00:41:38,585 --> 00:41:39,837
[Peter] Thanks, Coco.
895
00:41:40,478 --> 00:41:43,181
Pete, I like the way you do business.
896
00:41:44,048 --> 00:41:46,060
We're heading back to the big time.
897
00:41:46,396 --> 00:41:47,970
[Richard] There you are.
898
00:41:48,532 --> 00:41:50,998
Before we, uh, seal this puppy
899
00:41:51,065 --> 00:41:53,517
is there anything else
you wanna run by me?
900
00:41:53,589 --> 00:41:55,845
No. I think we're good to go, yeah?
901
00:41:56,837 --> 00:42:01,150
I mean, nothing
that you might have said, uh, publicly?
902
00:42:01,540 --> 00:42:02,579
[chuckles]
903
00:42:02,623 --> 00:42:04,704
You called me a stinking ham, on Wogan,
904
00:42:04,812 --> 00:42:07,314
with the emotional range of a chair leg.
905
00:42:07,409 --> 00:42:08,410
[chuckles]
906
00:42:08,462 --> 00:42:09,783
Did I say that?
907
00:42:09,850 --> 00:42:13,439
Gotta say, you've got brass balls
coming in here. I'll give you that.
908
00:42:14,157 --> 00:42:17,720
Okay, look, I just wanted to come here
with an opportunity,
909
00:42:17,925 --> 00:42:21,061
- something for you to get involved in.
- In your pathetic career?
910
00:42:21,492 --> 00:42:22,657
You've gone too far.
911
00:42:22,796 --> 00:42:24,965
I've got plenty of offers
all over this island.
912
00:42:25,032 --> 00:42:28,869
- I don't need to go to you.
- I'm sure you're inundated with requests
913
00:42:28,936 --> 00:42:31,905
for the greatest actor of his generation.
Behold...
914
00:42:32,306 --> 00:42:35,243
When you're the head
of a busy multinational corporation,
915
00:42:35,368 --> 00:42:37,244
you don't have time to exercise.
916
00:42:37,541 --> 00:42:40,384
But with Tumpers,
the man girdle system for men,
917
00:42:40,614 --> 00:42:43,016
you don't have to waste time
on your waistline.
918
00:42:43,111 --> 00:42:45,319
Tumpers man girdle tightens the waist,
919
00:42:45,385 --> 00:42:48,622
removing unsightly side, back,
and tummy bulge.
920
00:42:48,689 --> 00:42:50,257
[all laughing]
921
00:42:50,357 --> 00:42:52,816
- Yeah? Something funny?
- [Peter] You're finished.
922
00:42:53,018 --> 00:42:54,855
You fucked off to Hollywood 25 years ago
923
00:42:54,908 --> 00:42:59,214
'cause some L.A. windbag said
you were gonna be the next Burt Reynolds.
924
00:42:59,521 --> 00:43:03,042
Ehh. You gambled and you lost.
You lost at life.
925
00:43:05,105 --> 00:43:07,585
- You're living in a dream world.
- [Richard] In a dream world?
926
00:43:07,697 --> 00:43:10,159
Sorry, that's funny,
because this is a dream world...
927
00:43:10,253 --> 00:43:11,909
You're living in a plastic palace.
928
00:43:12,056 --> 00:43:14,152
None of this is real. This is not real.
929
00:43:14,339 --> 00:43:16,283
That's real, but this is not real.
930
00:43:16,472 --> 00:43:20,687
It's full of sycophants and prostitutes.
931
00:43:20,754 --> 00:43:21,941
[women gasp]
932
00:43:22,014 --> 00:43:23,378
You're a joke, Richard.
933
00:43:27,027 --> 00:43:30,605
Pat never charged me.
That one was on the house.
934
00:43:33,386 --> 00:43:34,434
[shouting and grunting]
935
00:43:34,701 --> 00:43:35,769
[woman screams]
936
00:43:35,836 --> 00:43:37,437
[Richard] Shit! Sorry.
937
00:43:37,696 --> 00:43:40,585
- Sorry. I was not aiming for you.
- Someone get Richard a skinny green.
938
00:43:40,610 --> 00:43:42,399
- [man 1] She all right?
- Shove it up your ass.
939
00:43:42,423 --> 00:43:44,390
[man 2] Somebody call the police.
940
00:43:45,078 --> 00:43:46,554
[Richard] Get that cocaine.
941
00:43:46,696 --> 00:43:50,000
And he's made one of the biggest mistakes
of his professional career.
942
00:43:50,184 --> 00:43:53,866
[Moncrief] That's right.
That's it, Richie. Get it down you.
943
00:43:54,426 --> 00:43:55,796
I love you.
944
00:43:56,645 --> 00:43:58,547
[both laughing]
945
00:43:59,020 --> 00:44:01,520
Do you remember this?
946
00:44:08,135 --> 00:44:09,908
And action!
947
00:44:10,800 --> 00:44:12,836
Mindhorn is back.
948
00:44:13,106 --> 00:44:16,588
[♪♪ Rock music playing over speakers]
949
00:44:16,924 --> 00:44:18,745
[whooping]
950
00:44:20,619 --> 00:44:24,400
Up yours! This island is a shithole!
951
00:44:29,856 --> 00:44:31,444
[groaning]
952
00:44:34,825 --> 00:44:35,859
Ah.
953
00:44:36,575 --> 00:44:38,356
That was a classic night, Jeff.
954
00:44:39,299 --> 00:44:40,793
[groans]
955
00:44:44,521 --> 00:44:46,981
Can I get you an Alka-Seltzer?
956
00:44:47,582 --> 00:44:49,145
Oh, shit.
957
00:44:50,020 --> 00:44:53,981
If you ever set foot on this island again,
you're going to jail.
958
00:44:54,537 --> 00:44:56,731
- Is this about your wife?
- What?
959
00:44:57,054 --> 00:45:00,981
We've never forgotten what you said
about the Isle of Man on Wogan.
960
00:45:01,388 --> 00:45:04,791
You said that we had a limited gene pool.
961
00:45:05,025 --> 00:45:06,360
Well, you do.
962
00:45:07,197 --> 00:45:09,715
And you have nothing on me because...
963
00:45:11,692 --> 00:45:13,582
You're joking, aren't you?
964
00:45:13,867 --> 00:45:17,387
I could bang you up
just for the vandalism alone.
965
00:45:17,513 --> 00:45:19,231
Yes.
966
00:45:20,400 --> 00:45:21,713
What vandalism?
967
00:45:22,081 --> 00:45:25,260
On this side we have a penis here,
as you can see, the scrotum.
968
00:45:25,379 --> 00:45:27,244
In Holland we call this the acorn.
969
00:45:27,541 --> 00:45:30,484
Got breasts here,
phallus, this time with the sputum.
970
00:45:30,550 --> 00:45:33,320
I don't know what this is.
971
00:45:33,752 --> 00:45:35,656
- That's an anus.
- No.
972
00:45:35,770 --> 00:45:37,909
- I think it's a titty.
- [Baines] All right, Richard.
973
00:45:37,933 --> 00:45:40,969
You just wait here
and I will get the car.
974
00:45:41,180 --> 00:45:42,420
- Okay.
- [Clive] Oh, hey, Rich.
975
00:45:42,523 --> 00:45:45,866
Hey, settle an argument.
What is this here? Is it an anus?
976
00:45:46,161 --> 00:45:48,805
I don't know what that is.
It's got nothing to do with me.
977
00:45:48,997 --> 00:45:50,375
You signed it, you moron.
978
00:45:50,609 --> 00:45:52,578
Well, I can speak English.
979
00:45:52,653 --> 00:45:56,219
Now he's racist, so write this down.
Racist.
980
00:46:00,453 --> 00:46:02,416
You know,
I nearly believed you for a minute.
981
00:46:02,482 --> 00:46:06,352
Look, I came here to help the police
and just things... went a bit wrong.
982
00:46:06,438 --> 00:46:08,641
You came back
to get some publicity from the murder.
983
00:46:08,822 --> 00:46:12,227
- That's not why I came back.
- Stop lying to yourself, Richard.
984
00:46:12,508 --> 00:46:15,625
And you're not lying to yourself?
Serious journalism?
985
00:46:16,086 --> 00:46:19,648
Manx cats with no tails?
Pat, you used to be an artist.
986
00:46:19,833 --> 00:46:22,039
I was a piece of totty
in a shit TV show.
987
00:46:22,156 --> 00:46:24,578
Mindhorn was not a shit TV show.
988
00:46:30,210 --> 00:46:31,430
Hey, Richie.
989
00:46:32,179 --> 00:46:34,328
You keep leaving things at the house.
990
00:46:34,727 --> 00:46:37,984
Your jacket, Pat, your dignity.
[chuckles]
991
00:46:38,020 --> 00:46:39,395
You think you've got it all,
don't you, Clive?
992
00:46:39,419 --> 00:46:42,559
You've got it all sewn up.
What you've got is a domestic prison.
993
00:46:42,613 --> 00:46:43,746
Better than a real prison.
994
00:46:43,890 --> 00:46:46,105
You've got your little wife,
little daughter.
995
00:46:46,191 --> 00:46:47,327
I've got freedom on my side.
996
00:46:47,394 --> 00:46:49,072
- I go where the wind takes me.
- Jasmine isn't mine.
997
00:46:49,096 --> 00:46:50,676
- What?
- Jasmine isn't mine.
998
00:46:50,809 --> 00:46:53,166
- Pat never told you?
- Pat didn't tell me what?
999
00:46:53,735 --> 00:46:55,304
- [chuckles]
- What about Jasmine?
1000
00:46:55,402 --> 00:46:56,480
[Baines] Richard!
1001
00:46:56,637 --> 00:46:57,660
[car horn honks]
1002
00:46:58,338 --> 00:47:01,098
[Clive] Yeah, bye, Richard.
Nice to see you.
1003
00:47:01,617 --> 00:47:03,949
- He's a very confused man.
- Yeah, tell me about it.
1004
00:47:04,099 --> 00:47:05,785
He didn't even know
about Jasmine.
1005
00:47:06,179 --> 00:47:08,207
- Your daughter?
- No, she's not my daughter.
1006
00:47:08,278 --> 00:47:09,824
I've had the, uh, snip.
1007
00:47:10,117 --> 00:47:13,371
No, she's, uh...
Peter Easterman's daughter.
1008
00:47:13,855 --> 00:47:16,052
- You had the snip, Green?
- No.
1009
00:47:16,320 --> 00:47:17,771
Something to think about.
1010
00:47:26,533 --> 00:47:28,052
[EKG beeping]
1011
00:47:37,944 --> 00:47:39,546
[Richard] Well, we got our man.
1012
00:47:39,613 --> 00:47:42,100
Hopefully that makes up for
the graffiti, and, uh...
1013
00:47:42,170 --> 00:47:44,684
Well, who knows,
maybe under different circumstances...
1014
00:47:44,896 --> 00:47:46,311
[Baines] Yeah, thanks, bye.
1015
00:47:54,845 --> 00:47:56,284
[Sarah on recording] Richard, hi.
1016
00:47:56,309 --> 00:47:59,139
I think you're going through
another transitional phase.
1017
00:47:59,273 --> 00:48:02,309
From unemployed actor
to unemployable actor.
1018
00:48:02,502 --> 00:48:03,850
I'm gonna have to let you go.
1019
00:48:04,037 --> 00:48:05,705
I've left your head shots in reception.
1020
00:48:05,839 --> 00:48:07,866
When you collect them, don't come up.
1021
00:48:14,648 --> 00:48:16,950
- [man] Are you finished?
- Hmm?
1022
00:48:17,097 --> 00:48:18,881
- The newspaper?
- Oh, yeah.
1023
00:48:32,065 --> 00:48:36,135
[woman on pa] Would foot passengers
awaiting the 2:15 departure to Liverpool
1024
00:48:36,221 --> 00:48:39,205
now kindly make their way
to the ferry terminal.
1025
00:48:52,252 --> 00:48:56,189
[Melly] Clue number one.
The killer is a secret baldie.
1026
00:49:03,855 --> 00:49:08,535
Clue number two.
A videotape of the actual killing.
1027
00:49:18,144 --> 00:49:20,300
[Pat on TV]
Breaking news at the Laxey Wheel.
1028
00:49:20,464 --> 00:49:23,583
Suspected murderer Paul Melly
has escaped from Greenborough Hospital
1029
00:49:23,650 --> 00:49:25,159
and taken himself hostage.
1030
00:49:25,293 --> 00:49:27,128
The public are warned
not to approach Melly,
1031
00:49:27,229 --> 00:49:29,214
as he is both armed and dangerous.
1032
00:49:29,675 --> 00:49:31,238
Get me Mindhorn!
1033
00:49:31,691 --> 00:49:34,027
[Moncrief] Mindhorn's coming back.
1034
00:49:34,782 --> 00:49:37,264
- Jeff.
- Hey, Richie.
1035
00:49:37,392 --> 00:49:39,532
- What happened to you last night?
- Play this.
1036
00:49:39,599 --> 00:49:41,532
- Oh, right.
- Melly sent it to me.
1037
00:49:41,651 --> 00:49:44,157
Well, he sent it to Mindhorn.
1038
00:49:45,021 --> 00:49:48,423
Hello, Mindhorn.
Kestrel here, reporting for duty.
1039
00:49:48,524 --> 00:49:52,045
This is going to be
an apocalypse of justice
1040
00:49:52,112 --> 00:49:55,382
for the bald man who really did
do the murder of Miss Lipinskii.
1041
00:49:55,448 --> 00:49:59,119
He... He pushed her
and he strangled her.
1042
00:49:59,185 --> 00:50:00,720
[Katya screams on tape]
1043
00:50:00,852 --> 00:50:03,032
And another man helped him
with the body.
1044
00:50:03,084 --> 00:50:04,084
[Richard] Who is that?
1045
00:50:04,391 --> 00:50:07,728
They didn't catch me, though,
because I hid in the bushes.
1046
00:50:09,009 --> 00:50:13,759
He had these posh shoes,
posh shoes with cats on them.
1047
00:50:14,034 --> 00:50:16,063
All right, see you soon, Mindhorn.
1048
00:50:18,405 --> 00:50:20,446
Melly's innocent. He's innocent.
1049
00:50:20,528 --> 00:50:23,103
- Give me the tape.
- Why? What you gonna do with it?
1050
00:50:23,276 --> 00:50:26,837
I'm gonna take it to the chief,
shove it up his ass and press play.
1051
00:50:27,010 --> 00:50:29,634
No, no, no. I've got a better idea.
1052
00:50:29,946 --> 00:50:33,548
The man on this tape
might pay some real money for this.
1053
00:50:33,667 --> 00:50:34,704
What, blackmail?
1054
00:50:34,813 --> 00:50:37,017
- Aye.
- This is low even for you, Jeff.
1055
00:50:37,157 --> 00:50:41,161
- Surely things aren't that bad.
- Of course they fucking are.
1056
00:50:41,261 --> 00:50:43,845
Look at me. I live in a caravan.
1057
00:50:43,923 --> 00:50:48,087
- This is your office, Jeff.
- I don't have a fucking office.
1058
00:50:48,268 --> 00:50:52,313
- What about your secretary?
- That is my secretary.
1059
00:50:52,704 --> 00:50:55,626
Twenty-five years I've been here,
1060
00:50:55,677 --> 00:51:00,634
- since you, arsehole, walked out on me.
- There comes a time in an actor's life
1061
00:51:00,829 --> 00:51:03,048
when he has to move away
from the small screen.
1062
00:51:03,183 --> 00:51:06,782
I used to have money.
I used to get your cast-offs.
1063
00:51:06,868 --> 00:51:08,837
I was like a pig in shite!
1064
00:51:09,108 --> 00:51:12,399
And then you waltzed off
to the big time.
1065
00:51:12,558 --> 00:51:16,751
- I live in a flat in Walthamstow.
- Oh, he lives in a flat!
1066
00:51:16,860 --> 00:51:20,300
Well, what about me?
I want what is due to me.
1067
00:51:20,367 --> 00:51:23,136
I want a Bentley convertible.
1068
00:51:23,203 --> 00:51:25,517
I want a trophy wife!
1069
00:51:25,795 --> 00:51:31,673
[sobbing]
I want a fucking infinity pool.
1070
00:51:33,079 --> 00:51:34,946
Jeff, it's... It's okay.
1071
00:51:35,582 --> 00:51:37,376
It's not as bad as you think, okay?
1072
00:51:37,626 --> 00:51:40,853
Things aren't that bad.
There's a silver lining to every cloud.
1073
00:51:40,950 --> 00:51:44,053
Oh, no, you don't, you sneaky bastard.
1074
00:51:44,257 --> 00:51:46,459
Not this time. You owe me.
1075
00:51:46,740 --> 00:51:49,256
We need to take
a step back here, Jeff.
1076
00:51:49,441 --> 00:51:52,944
A mentally fragile young man
is calling for my help.
1077
00:51:53,069 --> 00:51:56,826
- Yesterday you said he was a retard.
- Maybe I've seen a few things since then.
1078
00:51:56,912 --> 00:51:59,983
- Maybe my eyes have been opened.
- What are you talking about?
1079
00:52:00,080 --> 00:52:01,373
I'm a father, Jeff.
1080
00:52:01,904 --> 00:52:04,084
I've sired a daughter, with Pat.
1081
00:52:04,244 --> 00:52:05,662
What, Jasmine?
1082
00:52:06,446 --> 00:52:07,680
You idiot.
1083
00:52:07,803 --> 00:52:12,233
She could have been anyone's
the way Pat put it about after you left.
1084
00:52:13,196 --> 00:52:14,259
[groans]
1085
00:52:14,334 --> 00:52:16,670
- You take that back.
- Aye, I'm sorry.
1086
00:52:16,780 --> 00:52:18,825
You take a long, hard look
at yourself, Jeff.
1087
00:52:19,592 --> 00:52:22,248
[Moncrief] I'm sorry.
I'm not thinking straight.
1088
00:52:23,350 --> 00:52:25,331
- Give me the tape.
- Okay.
1089
00:52:28,535 --> 00:52:30,194
You're doing the right thing, Jeff.
1090
00:52:33,473 --> 00:52:34,873
Truth time.
1091
00:52:38,268 --> 00:52:40,856
[narrator] Bruce Mindhorn became
the best plainclothes detective
1092
00:52:40,880 --> 00:52:42,628
the Isle of Man had ever seen.
1093
00:52:42,718 --> 00:52:45,816
Out the way! Coming... Coming through!
1094
00:52:50,994 --> 00:52:52,394
Oh, God, no.
1095
00:52:53,527 --> 00:52:55,894
[panting] Jasmine, I'm sorry.
1096
00:52:56,302 --> 00:52:57,433
What for?
1097
00:52:57,598 --> 00:52:59,511
[gasps] Everything.
1098
00:52:59,933 --> 00:53:02,605
You know about me and your mother
and who I am.
1099
00:53:02,691 --> 00:53:04,604
Yes, yes, sadly I do.
1100
00:53:04,738 --> 00:53:06,847
I want you to know
I'm proud of you.
1101
00:53:07,042 --> 00:53:08,956
- Jas... Can I call you Jas?
- No.
1102
00:53:09,285 --> 00:53:11,821
Jasmine, I want us to get to know
each other really well, yeah?
1103
00:53:11,917 --> 00:53:12,972
This is weird.
1104
00:53:13,042 --> 00:53:16,349
I wanna give you my number.
I want us to set up regular phone calls.
1105
00:53:16,416 --> 00:53:19,535
- That's never gonna happen.
- Okay, we'll go at your pace.
1106
00:53:19,578 --> 00:53:21,113
But watch the news, Jasmine,
1107
00:53:21,221 --> 00:53:24,866
because you're gonna see your daddy
blow the lid off this island!
1108
00:53:32,262 --> 00:53:36,179
[Moncrief] So, to sum up,
do we have a deal, then?
1109
00:53:36,514 --> 00:53:38,349
I don't take very kindly to blackmail.
1110
00:53:38,471 --> 00:53:41,179
All right, keep your wig on.
1111
00:53:41,941 --> 00:53:43,819
Okay, I'll see you there.
1112
00:53:44,644 --> 00:53:47,944
- So, the simpleton was filming us?
- Yeah, it looks like it.
1113
00:53:49,765 --> 00:53:53,686
I'm starting to think framing Melly
was a really bad idea.
1114
00:53:54,203 --> 00:53:56,108
Get me Mindhorn!
1115
00:53:56,422 --> 00:53:58,358
Mindhorn!
1116
00:53:59,054 --> 00:54:01,382
Do you have a statement to make
about the situation?
1117
00:54:01,557 --> 00:54:04,660
The Isle of Man is still
one of the safest and most tranquil
1118
00:54:04,797 --> 00:54:06,866
tourist destinations in the world.
1119
00:54:07,500 --> 00:54:08,940
- [Melly] Get me Mindhorn!
- [grunts]
1120
00:54:09,669 --> 00:54:11,304
- Mindhorn's here!
- What?
1121
00:54:11,371 --> 00:54:13,406
I've got this, chief.
Stand your men down.
1122
00:54:15,355 --> 00:54:16,699
Is this the camera?
1123
00:54:17,644 --> 00:54:19,445
This man is innocent!
1124
00:54:19,512 --> 00:54:22,473
This tape will be the proof of my word.
1125
00:54:22,855 --> 00:54:24,637
Might wanna swing a lens, go wide.
1126
00:54:24,684 --> 00:54:27,302
Richard, what the hell
do you think you're doing?
1127
00:54:27,510 --> 00:54:29,919
Trust me.
Get one of your boffins to play this.
1128
00:54:30,089 --> 00:54:31,858
It shows that Melly's innocent.
1129
00:54:32,243 --> 00:54:33,591
How do I look?
1130
00:54:33,940 --> 00:54:35,411
Like you might need some help.
1131
00:54:35,767 --> 00:54:37,887
Too late. I work alone.
1132
00:54:39,832 --> 00:54:42,980
I'm coming, Melly!
Detective Mindhorn's on the case!
1133
00:54:43,290 --> 00:54:44,691
[Melly] Mindhorn!
1134
00:54:45,558 --> 00:54:46,816
[grunting]
1135
00:54:47,640 --> 00:54:49,409
Shit. Jesus.
1136
00:54:49,742 --> 00:54:51,911
[panting]
1137
00:54:52,120 --> 00:54:53,691
Oh, God.
1138
00:54:55,481 --> 00:54:56,810
Hi, Mindhorn.
1139
00:54:57,216 --> 00:55:01,701
Mindhorn... is this still
Operation Apocalypse of Justice?
1140
00:55:01,731 --> 00:55:03,666
Yes. I know you're innocent.
I've seen the tape.
1141
00:55:03,690 --> 00:55:06,279
This man is innocent! Play the tape!
1142
00:55:06,383 --> 00:55:08,943
We'll play the tape at the station.
1143
00:55:09,036 --> 00:55:10,863
No, no, I'm not going down the station.
1144
00:55:10,930 --> 00:55:13,240
- Play the tape now. Play it now.
- Okay... Okay. Whoa.
1145
00:55:13,404 --> 00:55:16,661
- He's serious, Patricia, and so am I.
- Yeah.
1146
00:55:16,836 --> 00:55:20,365
Okay, people, get ready to witness
some truth bombs.
1147
00:55:22,141 --> 00:55:24,599
You know how to do it, don't you?
1148
00:55:25,044 --> 00:55:28,099
- What?
- I'm gonna shit the truth out, bang.
1149
00:55:28,154 --> 00:55:31,279
- This is the wrong tape.
- My name is Bruce Mindhorn.
1150
00:55:31,384 --> 00:55:32,719
He swapped the... Okay.
1151
00:55:32,785 --> 00:55:36,055
Jeffrey Moncrief, who I will kill,
has got the real tape.
1152
00:55:36,326 --> 00:55:39,513
It's in... It's in the caravan.
We have to go to the caravan.
1153
00:55:39,720 --> 00:55:42,474
We'll do that when you both come down.
1154
00:55:42,762 --> 00:55:47,318
- Richard, is Melly armed?
- No, no, no. Negative.
1155
00:55:47,433 --> 00:55:49,115
No, I have got a gun.
1156
00:55:50,279 --> 00:55:52,905
- This is not a gun. It's not real.
- [Melly] Yeah, it is real.
1157
00:55:52,972 --> 00:55:54,852
- [Richard] It's not real.
- [Melly] It is real.
1158
00:55:54,984 --> 00:55:56,909
- It's not. It's a toy.
- It's not a toy.
1159
00:55:56,976 --> 00:55:58,978
- [gunshot, then all shouting]
- See? I told you.
1160
00:55:59,098 --> 00:56:00,880
- That's a green light. Shoot.
- Go, man.
1161
00:56:00,980 --> 00:56:02,815
- [Melly] Go.
- [Richard] Okay.
1162
00:56:02,882 --> 00:56:04,651
- This way.
- This is not the way to go!
1163
00:56:06,653 --> 00:56:07,787
Call Equity!
1164
00:56:07,854 --> 00:56:10,173
- [Peter] What's the hoo-hah?
- [woman] Thorncroft's gone insane.
1165
00:56:10,197 --> 00:56:11,657
This is terrible.
1166
00:56:12,492 --> 00:56:14,345
Wait. Did he sign that DVD thing?
1167
00:56:14,527 --> 00:56:16,806
- Yeah.
- In which case it's fantastic.
1168
00:56:17,196 --> 00:56:20,533
- Stop shooting! I haven't done anything!
- [Melly squawking]
1169
00:56:21,000 --> 00:56:23,536
Stop making that stupid bird noise!
1170
00:56:23,670 --> 00:56:25,004
[man] Stop there!
1171
00:56:26,107 --> 00:56:28,009
- Stop!
- They're heading into the mine.
1172
00:56:29,776 --> 00:56:31,555
Stop right there!
1173
00:56:38,017 --> 00:56:39,819
[Melly squawks]
1174
00:56:43,022 --> 00:56:46,134
They've gone again, chief. For now.
1175
00:57:07,246 --> 00:57:08,981
DS Baines.
1176
00:57:09,495 --> 00:57:10,863
Clever boy.
1177
00:57:11,537 --> 00:57:13,120
You're coming with me.
1178
00:57:14,527 --> 00:57:17,724
All I want to know
is who else has seen this tape?
1179
00:57:17,790 --> 00:57:21,105
Oh, no, no, no. I can't reveal my sources.
1180
00:57:22,161 --> 00:57:25,902
It was Richard Thorncroft.
This whole thing was his idea.
1181
00:57:26,040 --> 00:57:27,875
And possibly Pat Deville.
1182
00:57:27,900 --> 00:57:29,021
Pat Deville?
1183
00:57:29,046 --> 00:57:30,815
[Moncrief] He picked it up from her house.
1184
00:57:31,804 --> 00:57:33,272
How about 30 grand?
1185
00:57:33,561 --> 00:57:34,996
[chuckles] Jeffrey.
1186
00:57:35,855 --> 00:57:38,644
The last person
who tried to blackmail me...
1187
00:57:39,097 --> 00:57:40,646
is on this tape.
1188
00:57:40,832 --> 00:57:43,916
Only I haven't had a torrid affair
with you, Jeff.
1189
00:57:44,751 --> 00:57:47,941
Let's call it 50 quid
and everybody's happy, eh?
1190
00:57:51,844 --> 00:57:53,946
Great. This isn't the Bronx.
1191
00:57:54,060 --> 00:57:55,728
This is the Isle of Man!
1192
00:57:55,795 --> 00:57:57,253
[bleating]
1193
00:57:59,098 --> 00:58:00,535
[sirens wailing]
1194
00:58:02,560 --> 00:58:04,796
[squawking]
1195
00:58:05,905 --> 00:58:07,245
You okay, Mindhorn?
1196
00:58:07,385 --> 00:58:08,760
[panting] Oh, God. I'm gonna be sick.
1197
00:58:08,784 --> 00:58:09,800
Come on, this way.
1198
00:58:09,832 --> 00:58:10,886
To safety.
1199
00:58:10,918 --> 00:58:12,311
- Where are we going?
- The nest!
1200
00:58:12,406 --> 00:58:14,449
It's lucky you're special forces.
1201
00:58:14,573 --> 00:58:16,509
[grunts, then yelps]
1202
00:58:16,849 --> 00:58:18,066
How much further?
1203
00:58:18,168 --> 00:58:20,675
- [Melly] It's just here.
- [panting, then yelps]
1204
00:58:20,822 --> 00:58:22,941
- [Richard] What's this?
- We've got to jump.
1205
00:58:23,337 --> 00:58:24,402
Oh, yeah.
1206
00:58:24,557 --> 00:58:26,025
Yeah, let's just jump off a cliff!
1207
00:58:26,092 --> 00:58:28,061
- Yeah. You first.
- [laughing]
1208
00:58:28,127 --> 00:58:29,128
[Richard screaming]
1209
00:58:30,129 --> 00:58:32,231
[squawking]
1210
00:58:35,068 --> 00:58:36,602
[water splashing]
1211
00:58:37,979 --> 00:58:40,991
It now seems certain
the actor Richard Thorncroft,
1212
00:58:41,074 --> 00:58:44,147
who disappeared two days ago, is dead.
1213
00:58:44,319 --> 00:58:46,663
Thorncroft is the chief suspect
in the murder
1214
00:58:46,733 --> 00:58:49,218
of Mindhorn PR guru Jeffrey Moncrief.
1215
00:58:49,343 --> 00:58:51,884
It is now accepted
that Thorncroft could be suffering
1216
00:58:52,007 --> 00:58:53,653
a severe mental breakdown
1217
00:58:53,719 --> 00:58:56,689
after a long career lull
since the hit show ended.
1218
00:58:56,756 --> 00:58:59,296
Even a short walk
can take its toll on the lower legs.
1219
00:58:59,592 --> 00:59:01,725
That's why I use Thrombi-Sox.
1220
00:59:01,837 --> 00:59:03,972
Jeffrey Moncrief, who I will kill...
1221
00:59:04,063 --> 00:59:05,171
[gunshot]
1222
00:59:05,288 --> 00:59:09,749
You can never say that it's a good thing
when someone is dead,
1223
00:59:10,740 --> 00:59:15,945
but maybe with Richard
this has been for the best.
1224
00:59:16,028 --> 00:59:20,483
I keep expecting him
to walk through the door and, uh, say:
1225
00:59:20,584 --> 00:59:23,887
"Hey, Pete, old buddy,
how are the DVD sales going?"
1226
00:59:24,010 --> 00:59:28,481
Because, of course, you know,
Mindhorn is finally released today on DVD.
1227
00:59:28,569 --> 00:59:29,688
Yeah.
1228
00:59:29,775 --> 00:59:32,671
Um, could you stop filming now?
I think I might be about to cry.
1229
00:59:32,963 --> 00:59:35,319
[man] Thorncroft's excursion into
the recording studio
1230
00:59:35,394 --> 00:59:37,866
yielded this album from 1990.
1231
00:59:37,975 --> 00:59:40,867
His signature tune,
"Can't Handcuff the Wind,"
1232
00:59:40,933 --> 00:59:43,836
reached number one
in several East European countries.
1233
00:59:43,903 --> 00:59:45,029
["Can't Handcuff the Wind"
playing over speakers]
1234
00:59:45,053 --> 00:59:47,840
♪ You can't handcuff the wind ♪
1235
00:59:48,741 --> 00:59:52,077
♪ And if you try, you're gonna fail ♪
1236
00:59:55,915 --> 00:59:57,155
Hi.
1237
00:59:58,184 --> 00:59:59,561
You're gonna love this.
1238
00:59:59,674 --> 01:00:03,319
I've made you look
exactly how you used to.
1239
01:00:07,803 --> 01:00:09,238
[woman on TV] You're crazy!
1240
01:00:09,328 --> 01:00:10,930
It's perfect.
1241
01:00:12,490 --> 01:00:13,719
I can't move.
1242
01:00:13,840 --> 01:00:15,897
- Yeah. I glued you into your clothes.
- What?
1243
01:00:15,950 --> 01:00:18,253
There's three rolls of masking tape
around your neck.
1244
01:00:18,359 --> 01:00:19,828
You glued me into my clothes?
1245
01:00:19,918 --> 01:00:22,054
Your hair came off in the sea.
1246
01:00:22,441 --> 01:00:24,757
But it's okay,
'cause I stuck it back on...
1247
01:00:24,982 --> 01:00:27,007
- I can't breathe.
- With superglue.
1248
01:00:27,147 --> 01:00:28,915
So, it will never come off again.
1249
01:00:28,981 --> 01:00:30,349
[grunting]
1250
01:00:31,217 --> 01:00:32,468
Good, innit?
1251
01:00:33,113 --> 01:00:34,514
[groaning]
1252
01:00:34,600 --> 01:00:35,610
And your eye patch.
1253
01:00:35,635 --> 01:00:36,671
Where are we?
1254
01:00:36,725 --> 01:00:38,975
We are in an underground lair. The nest.
1255
01:00:39,085 --> 01:00:44,780
And this is where we complete
Operation Apocalypse of Justice.
1256
01:00:44,871 --> 01:00:47,897
[chuckles]
Right. First, we need a penknife.
1257
01:00:48,234 --> 01:00:50,970
And this recorder belt. Ha!
1258
01:00:51,037 --> 01:00:52,705
[Melly on recording]
Recorder belt. Ha!
1259
01:00:52,772 --> 01:00:56,085
[laughs] Fake blood
for fooling the baddies, and...
1260
01:00:57,143 --> 01:00:58,319
pretend gun.
1261
01:00:58,778 --> 01:01:01,468
'Cause I'm your partner
and we're working on a case.
1262
01:01:01,519 --> 01:01:05,608
- And it's a good case, isn't it, Mindhorn?
- Yeah, it's a really good case.
1263
01:01:05,843 --> 01:01:09,132
Yeah, just one small problem is
I'm not Mindhorn.
1264
01:01:09,734 --> 01:01:12,632
There is no Mindhorn. Mindhorn isn't real.
1265
01:01:12,874 --> 01:01:14,727
He... He... He is real.
1266
01:01:14,802 --> 01:01:18,444
- Uh, Uh... Truth powder.
- That is merchandise, okay?
1267
01:01:18,538 --> 01:01:21,976
Do you know what merchandise is?
Cheap rubbish we sell to idiots, yeah?
1268
01:01:22,033 --> 01:01:25,593
And by the way, that nearly blinded
four teenagers in Whitby in 1989.
1269
01:01:25,662 --> 01:01:27,342
- Had to be taken off the market.
- Did it?
1270
01:01:27,460 --> 01:01:29,147
Mindhorn is a fictional character
1271
01:01:29,225 --> 01:01:31,608
in a TV show I did
a quarter of a century ago.
1272
01:01:31,817 --> 01:01:33,185
What's a fictional character?
1273
01:01:33,346 --> 01:01:35,181
I'm an actor. Well, I used to be.
1274
01:01:35,248 --> 01:01:37,241
Now I just advertise
orthopedic socks.
1275
01:01:37,366 --> 01:01:40,152
And I don't even do that now,
'cause John Nettles got the gig!
1276
01:01:40,601 --> 01:01:43,343
I don't... I don't understand.
1277
01:01:43,553 --> 01:01:45,616
You don't understand?
Let me clear things up.
1278
01:01:45,687 --> 01:01:48,780
Your parents carked it,
you lost your marbles,
1279
01:01:48,894 --> 01:01:52,147
you got fixated with me
in some weird, creepy way
1280
01:01:52,257 --> 01:01:54,968
which I don't wanna get into.
You think I'm here to rescue you.
1281
01:01:55,022 --> 01:01:57,698
That's not gonna happen.
I'm a self-obsessed arsehole.
1282
01:01:57,898 --> 01:01:59,507
Does that clear things up?
1283
01:01:59,671 --> 01:02:03,009
Paul Melly, wanted in connection
with the murder of Katya Lipinskii,
1284
01:02:03,075 --> 01:02:04,577
is also presumed dead.
1285
01:02:04,678 --> 01:02:07,947
Melly, 32, is believed
to have a mental age of nine.
1286
01:02:08,014 --> 01:02:10,819
- Who's gonna clear my name?
- Nobody.
1287
01:02:12,323 --> 01:02:13,538
There's no evidence.
1288
01:02:13,707 --> 01:02:16,632
We had a tape. The tape's gone. It's over.
1289
01:02:18,550 --> 01:02:20,085
Both of them?
1290
01:02:21,538 --> 01:02:24,063
Both of them?
What do you mean, "both of them"?
1291
01:02:24,194 --> 01:02:26,233
Yeah, I made a copy of the tape.
1292
01:02:26,570 --> 01:02:27,991
You taught me that.
1293
01:02:28,397 --> 01:02:29,474
Always make a copy.
1294
01:02:29,546 --> 01:02:31,350
Well, Mindhorn did.
1295
01:02:31,504 --> 01:02:33,468
Only you're not... You're not Mindhorn.
1296
01:02:33,588 --> 01:02:34,905
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
1297
01:02:35,094 --> 01:02:36,546
I am Mindhorn.
1298
01:02:37,343 --> 01:02:40,155
- What? But you said...
- No, you passed the test.
1299
01:02:40,267 --> 01:02:41,902
Kestrel, well done.
1300
01:02:42,707 --> 01:02:44,676
- Did I?
- You made promotion, partner.
1301
01:02:44,837 --> 01:02:48,014
From now on,
you shall be known as the Falcon.
1302
01:02:48,538 --> 01:02:50,031
No, I prefer Kestrel.
1303
01:02:50,108 --> 01:02:51,891
Kestrel's fine, too. Where's the tape?
1304
01:02:51,916 --> 01:02:55,428
I made a copy of the tape and put it
in your car at Mindhorn Heights.
1305
01:02:55,524 --> 01:02:56,525
Yes.
1306
01:02:56,600 --> 01:02:59,749
Now I'm gonna pack the bag
for the finale when we kill the baddies.
1307
01:02:59,823 --> 01:03:01,686
Okay, sounds like a plan, partner.
1308
01:03:01,741 --> 01:03:02,756
I'm gonna head off.
1309
01:03:02,835 --> 01:03:05,213
- I'll give you a signal when I need you.
- What's the signal?
1310
01:03:05,237 --> 01:03:07,751
- Uh... You'll know when you hear it.
- I need to hear it now.
1311
01:03:07,806 --> 01:03:08,895
[whistles]
1312
01:03:08,920 --> 01:03:09,920
No.
1313
01:03:10,461 --> 01:03:11,616
[squawks]
1314
01:03:11,696 --> 01:03:12,874
- Better.
- Good. Okay.
1315
01:03:12,932 --> 01:03:14,514
Yeah. Take this.
Make sure you wear it.
1316
01:03:14,613 --> 01:03:16,843
- What is that?
- It's the recorder belt.
1317
01:03:16,921 --> 01:03:19,249
Recorder belt, okay.
Strapping that on now, Kestrel.
1318
01:03:19,296 --> 01:03:20,419
And this.
1319
01:03:20,444 --> 01:03:22,733
Roger that. Weird plastic radio. Got it.
1320
01:03:22,991 --> 01:03:24,928
- Uh... Does this work?
- No.
1321
01:03:25,532 --> 01:03:28,264
- It does work, actually, FYI.
- Oh, right.
1322
01:03:30,901 --> 01:03:32,382
Who are you calling?
1323
01:03:32,671 --> 01:03:34,811
The only person we can trust.
1324
01:03:45,010 --> 01:03:47,079
- Baines.
- Richard. Wow.
1325
01:03:47,146 --> 01:03:49,415
- Don't ask.
- Thank God you're alive. Where's Melly?
1326
01:03:49,482 --> 01:03:52,651
In a cave. He made a copy of the tape
and he's hidden it at Pat's.
1327
01:03:52,752 --> 01:03:54,010
Whereabouts at Pat's?
1328
01:03:54,120 --> 01:03:56,922
In the garage. In the glove compartment
of the Mindhorn car.
1329
01:03:57,088 --> 01:03:58,323
[Baines] Mm-hm.
1330
01:03:58,479 --> 01:04:01,674
- What have you got the gun for?
- You know too much, Richard.
1331
01:04:02,622 --> 01:04:04,002
I don't know anything.
1332
01:04:04,369 --> 01:04:05,783
I'm actually quite confused.
1333
01:04:05,875 --> 01:04:08,174
You know that I killed Moncrief, right?
1334
01:04:08,391 --> 01:04:09,471
I did not know that.
1335
01:04:09,566 --> 01:04:10,611
Well, you do now.
1336
01:04:10,690 --> 01:04:12,760
Uh, not a problem. I can blank it out.
1337
01:04:12,868 --> 01:04:14,057
I have that capacity. I...
1338
01:04:14,140 --> 01:04:17,424
I've blanked out huge chapters of my life.
This is just one more thing.
1339
01:04:17,565 --> 01:04:20,182
Sorry, Richard. Final curtain.
1340
01:04:20,773 --> 01:04:22,096
[squawking]
1341
01:04:28,271 --> 01:04:29,271
[Melly squawks]
1342
01:04:29,345 --> 01:04:30,379
Truth powder.
1343
01:04:30,556 --> 01:04:33,325
[grunts, then shouts]
1344
01:04:33,426 --> 01:04:35,161
- Quick, the gun.
- What is that?
1345
01:04:35,186 --> 01:04:36,210
Come on.
1346
01:04:36,235 --> 01:04:37,630
[Baines coughing]
1347
01:04:37,696 --> 01:04:39,465
- [Baines] Jesus Christ!
- [Richard] Bike!
1348
01:04:39,656 --> 01:04:41,257
She's left the keys in the bike.
1349
01:04:44,203 --> 01:04:45,704
- Yes!
- Why did you do that?
1350
01:04:46,357 --> 01:04:50,263
We could have used the bike
to get away, you stupid berk.
1351
01:04:50,509 --> 01:04:52,178
[Baines coughing]
1352
01:04:55,580 --> 01:04:57,388
[cell phone buzzing]
1353
01:04:59,872 --> 01:05:01,463
- Hello?
- [Baines over phone] Hi, Pat.
1354
01:05:01,552 --> 01:05:03,088
Yeah, it's DS Baines here.
1355
01:05:03,155 --> 01:05:07,068
I just thought I should tell you
that Richard is alive.
1356
01:05:07,255 --> 01:05:08,427
He's alive?
1357
01:05:08,494 --> 01:05:10,662
Alive, yeah, yeah. Great... Great news.
1358
01:05:10,990 --> 01:05:11,997
Mixed bag, though.
1359
01:05:12,064 --> 01:05:14,033
He is delusional.
1360
01:05:14,099 --> 01:05:16,202
Oh, God, he's seriously ill, isn't he?
1361
01:05:16,268 --> 01:05:18,704
He is. He's on his way to you now.
1362
01:05:18,971 --> 01:05:21,474
He thinks he's in an old episode
of Mindhorn.
1363
01:05:21,540 --> 01:05:24,977
And I just need you
to keep him there and I will...
1364
01:05:25,044 --> 01:05:26,312
I will come to you, okay?
1365
01:05:26,378 --> 01:05:27,378
So, just wait there.
1366
01:05:28,013 --> 01:05:30,015
[gasping]
1367
01:05:31,515 --> 01:05:33,132
Where's the car?
1368
01:05:34,288 --> 01:05:36,069
No! Where is it?
1369
01:05:36,444 --> 01:05:38,257
Where's the bloody car?!
1370
01:05:38,823 --> 01:05:40,615
It should be here!
1371
01:05:40,982 --> 01:05:42,628
It should be...!
1372
01:05:44,029 --> 01:05:46,951
[whimpering, then laughing]
1373
01:05:53,888 --> 01:05:55,099
Richard?
1374
01:05:56,775 --> 01:05:58,318
Are you okay?
1375
01:06:01,974 --> 01:06:04,740
No. I'm having a really bad day.
1376
01:06:05,417 --> 01:06:07,386
- Where's my car?
- Why don't you just...?
1377
01:06:07,453 --> 01:06:08,974
Just come... Come and sit down.
1378
01:06:09,061 --> 01:06:10,810
Can't sit down. I'm glued in.
1379
01:06:11,056 --> 01:06:12,625
Just calm down and...
1380
01:06:12,691 --> 01:06:14,226
Baines is trying to kill me.
1381
01:06:14,318 --> 01:06:15,494
She's corrupt.
1382
01:06:15,561 --> 01:06:16,896
There's a bald man.
1383
01:06:17,496 --> 01:06:19,798
He's... He's got cats on his shoes.
1384
01:06:20,060 --> 01:06:23,736
I've seen them. Not real cats. False cats.
Tiny false cats on his shoes.
1385
01:06:23,802 --> 01:06:25,849
Richard, none of this is real.
1386
01:06:25,956 --> 01:06:27,435
It's all real!
1387
01:06:27,542 --> 01:06:30,388
It's come real.
Where's my car? Where's it gone?
1388
01:06:30,445 --> 01:06:31,452
The car?
1389
01:06:31,477 --> 01:06:33,412
Uh, Clive is bringing the car.
1390
01:06:33,505 --> 01:06:35,771
He's bringing the car.
It'll be here in a few minutes.
1391
01:06:35,872 --> 01:06:38,794
- [panting]
- Now, just calm down and talk to me.
1392
01:06:38,881 --> 01:06:40,451
They're coming. I can't wait here.
1393
01:06:40,537 --> 01:06:42,257
Let's talk about... About us.
1394
01:06:42,300 --> 01:06:43,630
Us? There is no us.
1395
01:06:43,722 --> 01:06:47,935
I blew it. I walked out on the only thing
that ever meant anything to me. You.
1396
01:06:49,669 --> 01:06:53,716
Since I left you,
my life has been really quite bad.
1397
01:06:54,133 --> 01:06:57,303
Richard, it's all right. It's all right.
1398
01:06:57,671 --> 01:07:00,716
Leaving you was the biggest mistake
of my life.
1399
01:07:01,351 --> 01:07:02,724
[Melly squawking]
1400
01:07:03,160 --> 01:07:04,404
What is that?
1401
01:07:05,311 --> 01:07:06,615
Kestrel.
1402
01:07:07,177 --> 01:07:08,419
Sorry.
1403
01:07:08,546 --> 01:07:09,546
I'm so sorry.
1404
01:07:11,216 --> 01:07:13,951
[Clive laughing] Yes.
1405
01:07:14,141 --> 01:07:15,476
So, he's not dead.
1406
01:07:15,662 --> 01:07:17,990
He just fell asleep on the sunbed.
1407
01:07:18,107 --> 01:07:19,725
Put down the gardening equipment, Clive.
1408
01:07:19,857 --> 01:07:25,230
Get out of my house before I strim
that stupid fucking wig off.
1409
01:07:25,297 --> 01:07:29,101
Where's my car?!
1410
01:07:29,285 --> 01:07:30,906
Don't tell him, Clive.
1411
01:07:31,704 --> 01:07:34,117
Pete took it for the parade.
1412
01:07:34,312 --> 01:07:35,441
What's going on?
1413
01:07:35,507 --> 01:07:37,601
Stay away from him, Jasmine.
His brain's come loose.
1414
01:07:37,657 --> 01:07:41,125
Whatever happens next,
I want you to remember two things.
1415
01:07:41,636 --> 01:07:43,836
One, I'm innocent.
1416
01:07:44,304 --> 01:07:48,341
And two, Daddy loves you.
1417
01:07:52,092 --> 01:07:54,061
[Richard grunting]
1418
01:07:54,207 --> 01:07:57,176
Oh, shit. Oh, no. Dear.
These are nothing to do with me.
1419
01:07:57,284 --> 01:07:59,622
Oh, Richard. Dirty, dirty Richard.
1420
01:07:59,767 --> 01:08:01,223
You're pathetic.
1421
01:08:01,333 --> 01:08:02,512
These aren't mine.
1422
01:08:02,768 --> 01:08:03,997
What are all these?
1423
01:08:04,155 --> 01:08:07,645
They're from my, uh, pen pal
in, uh, France.
1424
01:08:11,410 --> 01:08:13,200
[Pat] These are all from Richard.
1425
01:08:13,872 --> 01:08:15,747
I was trying to protect you, Pat.
1426
01:08:16,919 --> 01:08:18,309
The man is poison.
1427
01:08:20,519 --> 01:08:21,950
I'm going to work.
1428
01:08:27,526 --> 01:08:28,694
[Richard] There she blows.
1429
01:08:28,761 --> 01:08:31,442
[Melly] And a load of fake Mindhorns.
1430
01:08:36,368 --> 01:08:39,889
I really do think this could be
the best Manx Day we've ever had.
1431
01:08:40,164 --> 01:08:41,265
Sorry I'm late.
1432
01:08:41,503 --> 01:08:43,428
Better late than never, Pat.
1433
01:08:43,545 --> 01:08:44,610
Um...
1434
01:08:44,692 --> 01:08:48,462
I'll be making my speech
slightly later than scheduled.
1435
01:08:49,398 --> 01:08:51,800
I've provided copies for you all.
1436
01:08:52,169 --> 01:08:54,571
They're on the table in the entrance hall.
1437
01:08:55,259 --> 01:08:56,629
Thanks, everyone.
1438
01:08:56,840 --> 01:08:58,582
Go enjoy the madness.
1439
01:08:58,791 --> 01:09:00,259
[chuckles] All right?
1440
01:09:00,427 --> 01:09:01,769
Okay, thanks.
1441
01:09:04,963 --> 01:09:06,398
Pat, could I have a word?
1442
01:09:06,498 --> 01:09:08,943
- [man 1] I'll see you back at the office.
- [man 2] At the office. Yeah.
1443
01:09:08,967 --> 01:09:10,299
All right.
1444
01:09:11,236 --> 01:09:14,030
- Nice to meet you actually.
- Yeah. I must give you my card.
1445
01:09:20,095 --> 01:09:21,864
Pat, Pat, Pat.
1446
01:09:23,698 --> 01:09:25,389
You know, don't you?
1447
01:09:31,810 --> 01:09:33,983
I'm in a bit of a pickle, aren't I?
1448
01:09:34,526 --> 01:09:35,794
I mean, you're a journalist.
1449
01:09:35,861 --> 01:09:39,694
You're not gonna keep it to yourself,
are you? Something this big?
1450
01:09:40,689 --> 01:09:42,889
How can I let you leave this room?
1451
01:09:43,836 --> 01:09:48,334
I absolutely cannot have people
finding out that I'm bald.
1452
01:09:55,848 --> 01:09:58,256
I think bald men are sexy.
1453
01:10:00,786 --> 01:10:02,319
Yeah, I think you're right.
1454
01:10:02,519 --> 01:10:03,854
[cell phone buzzing] Oh.
1455
01:10:03,979 --> 01:10:05,647
I'll have to take this.
1456
01:10:06,499 --> 01:10:09,733
[Baines] The tape's at the parade.
I'm going after them.
1457
01:10:13,331 --> 01:10:14,733
She knows.
1458
01:10:21,440 --> 01:10:25,467
Welcome, one and all,
to the Manx Day parade.
1459
01:10:25,517 --> 01:10:28,623
We're gonna have some great fun.
1460
01:10:29,732 --> 01:10:30,944
Thank you.
1461
01:10:31,061 --> 01:10:34,987
I wonder who's gonna win
today's Float of the Year competition.
1462
01:10:35,194 --> 01:10:37,689
Could it be the really big spider?
1463
01:10:38,069 --> 01:10:40,993
Or the two massive papier-mâché heads?
1464
01:10:41,280 --> 01:10:45,006
Or perhaps the crazy caterpillar?
Runner-up last year.
1465
01:10:45,195 --> 01:10:48,100
Fingers crossed
for no more trapped ankles.
1466
01:10:48,272 --> 01:10:52,678
And there's Trevor
in his intergalactic mobility scooter.
1467
01:10:52,889 --> 01:10:55,108
The Windjammer float there.
1468
01:10:55,607 --> 01:10:57,170
Always good fun.
1469
01:10:57,247 --> 01:11:01,451
It's the most successful TV program
ever made on the Isle of Man.
1470
01:11:01,582 --> 01:11:04,218
Oh, and, look, it's the villain.
1471
01:11:04,583 --> 01:11:08,119
But Windjammer disarms him
and saves the day.
1472
01:11:08,450 --> 01:11:09,748
Super stuff.
1473
01:11:09,888 --> 01:11:13,592
- And new this year, the Mindhorn contingent.
- Oh, look!
1474
01:11:13,659 --> 01:11:15,686
Remember Mindhorn, folks?
1475
01:11:15,912 --> 01:11:19,531
Mindhorn, of course,
originally played by, um...
1476
01:11:20,163 --> 01:11:21,934
Oh, and who's this?
1477
01:11:22,000 --> 01:11:25,938
Another Mindhorn and a crazy person.
1478
01:11:26,004 --> 01:11:27,339
A sort of chicken man.
1479
01:11:35,380 --> 01:11:38,777
I don't remember the episode
"Mindhorn and the Chicken Man."
1480
01:11:38,858 --> 01:11:41,294
But, uh, what's Mindhorn doing now?
1481
01:11:41,620 --> 01:11:47,160
No doubt finding some crucial piece
of evidence to uncover the truth.
1482
01:11:48,093 --> 01:11:50,829
And here comes the baddie.
1483
01:11:51,336 --> 01:11:52,431
Oh, no.
1484
01:11:52,497 --> 01:11:54,633
[grunts, then crowd cheering]
1485
01:11:54,700 --> 01:11:57,069
Oh-ho-ho. Wonderful look-a-like there.
1486
01:11:57,246 --> 01:12:01,907
Doesn't she look like Manx TV's
very own Pat Deville?
1487
01:12:02,541 --> 01:12:03,842
[engine revving]
1488
01:12:04,710 --> 01:12:05,611
Go, go, go!
1489
01:12:05,677 --> 01:12:06,745
I can't make it go.
1490
01:12:06,812 --> 01:12:09,975
I knew you hadn't passed your test,
you naughty liar.
1491
01:12:10,280 --> 01:12:14,484
You can take my woman,
but you can't take my fucking car.
1492
01:12:15,020 --> 01:12:16,855
- Can't make it go!
- The handbrake's on.
1493
01:12:16,922 --> 01:12:18,202
[Richard] Where's the handbrake?
1494
01:12:18,390 --> 01:12:20,692
- It's over there.
- You're like a Formula champion.
1495
01:12:21,460 --> 01:12:22,494
Oh, shit!
1496
01:12:22,561 --> 01:12:23,562
[crowd groans]
1497
01:12:25,030 --> 01:12:26,698
[man] Fantastic!
1498
01:12:27,029 --> 01:12:29,045
Full marks to the stuntman.
1499
01:12:29,131 --> 01:12:30,303
I wasn't ready.
1500
01:12:30,435 --> 01:12:32,104
- I can't actually drive.
- Get out.
1501
01:12:32,129 --> 01:12:33,192
I never learnt.
1502
01:12:33,217 --> 01:12:35,217
- [Pat] Oh, shut up!
- [Richard] I never had to.
1503
01:12:35,406 --> 01:12:37,608
I was driven everywhere,
I didn't have to bother.
1504
01:12:38,076 --> 01:12:40,029
Hi. Yep, hello.
1505
01:12:41,947 --> 01:12:45,450
[man]
And here's the baddie retrieving her gun.
1506
01:12:45,517 --> 01:12:47,719
- [Pat] Get in the car!
- What?
1507
01:12:47,786 --> 01:12:49,110
- [gunshot]
- Oh!
1508
01:12:49,205 --> 01:12:50,625
[man] Classic!
1509
01:12:52,124 --> 01:12:54,485
And now the nail-biting finale.
1510
01:12:54,573 --> 01:12:55,774
[gunshot]
1511
01:12:58,110 --> 01:13:01,946
Oh, bad luck, baddie, and that's Mindhorn.
1512
01:13:02,100 --> 01:13:04,149
Winner of the day in my view.
1513
01:13:04,525 --> 01:13:05,875
Great stuff.
1514
01:13:09,875 --> 01:13:11,209
[yelling]
1515
01:13:11,476 --> 01:13:15,275
We're flying to the truth!
1516
01:13:15,510 --> 01:13:17,400
[Melly squawking]
1517
01:13:32,292 --> 01:13:33,519
[Richard] What are we doing?
1518
01:13:33,678 --> 01:13:35,019
It's a dead end.
1519
01:13:35,453 --> 01:13:36,651
Where are we?
1520
01:13:37,235 --> 01:13:38,971
This is your cove, Mindhorn.
1521
01:13:39,353 --> 01:13:41,118
- What?
- Where do we go from here?
1522
01:13:41,309 --> 01:13:42,644
Well, the tunnels.
1523
01:13:43,417 --> 01:13:45,667
- Melly.
- Melly, come on, come on.
1524
01:13:48,160 --> 01:13:49,794
[groaning]
1525
01:13:50,058 --> 01:13:51,839
[Pat] What's wrong?
1526
01:13:52,956 --> 01:13:56,167
That was... That was great, wasn't it?
1527
01:13:57,192 --> 01:13:58,784
You've been shot.
1528
01:13:58,964 --> 01:14:00,125
[Richard] You're bleeding.
1529
01:14:00,192 --> 01:14:02,034
No, no, no, don't worry.
1530
01:14:02,194 --> 01:14:03,295
It's fake blood.
1531
01:14:04,354 --> 01:14:05,878
Oh, no, that's there.
1532
01:14:06,186 --> 01:14:07,721
We have to get you some help.
1533
01:14:08,220 --> 01:14:09,425
I'm dying, Mindhorn.
1534
01:14:09,510 --> 01:14:10,948
No. No, you're not.
1535
01:14:11,426 --> 01:14:12,698
This is the end.
1536
01:14:13,038 --> 01:14:14,806
- No.
- Go on without me. Leave me here.
1537
01:14:14,873 --> 01:14:16,448
I'm not leaving you.
1538
01:14:19,019 --> 01:14:20,839
Because I'm a good partner?
1539
01:14:21,046 --> 01:14:24,276
You're the best damn partner
a man could ask for, Kestrel.
1540
01:14:24,750 --> 01:14:26,620
Your parents would be proud of you.
1541
01:14:27,266 --> 01:14:28,597
I'm proud of you.
1542
01:14:30,255 --> 01:14:31,722
Thanks, Mindhorn.
1543
01:14:32,824 --> 01:14:35,776
It's been an honor to be your partner.
1544
01:14:37,075 --> 01:14:39,808
Well, it's the best 15 minutes of my life.
1545
01:14:41,486 --> 01:14:43,370
Here's the copy of the tape.
1546
01:14:43,619 --> 01:14:44,808
Now go.
1547
01:14:45,203 --> 01:14:49,526
Promise me...
you'll clear my name, Mindhorn.
1548
01:14:50,082 --> 01:14:51,151
I promise.
1549
01:14:51,259 --> 01:14:52,503
And promise me...
1550
01:14:52,854 --> 01:14:55,933
you two will finally get it together.
1551
01:14:56,281 --> 01:14:58,581
I'm sorry, I can't promise you that.
1552
01:14:59,251 --> 01:15:01,433
I mean... yes.
1553
01:15:02,220 --> 01:15:04,843
Give him a kiss, Angela.
1554
01:15:13,231 --> 01:15:16,163
One last thing, Mindhorn.
1555
01:15:16,547 --> 01:15:20,976
Tell me the truth
about Richard Thorncroft.
1556
01:15:21,973 --> 01:15:23,484
Who is he?
1557
01:15:26,242 --> 01:15:28,648
Let's just say
he's someone I used to know.
1558
01:15:29,181 --> 01:15:31,273
Right. That's...
1559
01:15:41,092 --> 01:15:43,294
You poor, deluded fool.
1560
01:15:44,834 --> 01:15:46,873
I am Richard Thorncroft.
1561
01:15:59,964 --> 01:16:01,808
At least he didn't die in vain.
1562
01:16:04,744 --> 01:16:06,511
What the hell is this?
1563
01:16:09,154 --> 01:16:11,800
Yep. It's Plasticine.
1564
01:16:12,524 --> 01:16:14,760
Yep. It's a Plasticine copy.
1565
01:16:14,960 --> 01:16:16,292
[laughing]
1566
01:16:16,962 --> 01:16:18,581
It's Plasticine.
1567
01:16:21,733 --> 01:16:23,347
[screaming]
1568
01:16:31,197 --> 01:16:32,629
Quick.
1569
01:16:40,605 --> 01:16:42,240
[grunting]
1570
01:16:55,867 --> 01:16:58,538
[Richard on recording]
It's time for the Apocalypse of Justice.
1571
01:17:09,014 --> 01:17:10,348
[rocks clattering]
1572
01:17:10,423 --> 01:17:12,053
Baines, don't shoot.
1573
01:17:13,718 --> 01:17:15,100
We've got the tape.
1574
01:17:15,287 --> 01:17:16,855
Richard has it. It's safe.
1575
01:17:16,922 --> 01:17:18,061
I'll take you to him.
1576
01:17:18,170 --> 01:17:19,925
Maybe we could strike a deal.
1577
01:17:19,991 --> 01:17:24,311
- I don't wanna see the mayor go down.
- Pat, is that the best you can do?
1578
01:17:24,704 --> 01:17:26,654
I thought you were a good actress.
1579
01:17:26,932 --> 01:17:28,350
[Richard] She's good enough.
1580
01:17:28,626 --> 01:17:30,381
Lose the piece.
1581
01:17:33,757 --> 01:17:34,834
Turn around.
1582
01:17:35,010 --> 01:17:36,217
Slowly.
1583
01:17:36,975 --> 01:17:38,576
Hands in the air.
1584
01:17:40,345 --> 01:17:41,913
Now who's holding all the aces?
1585
01:17:42,108 --> 01:17:43,248
[Richard shouts]
1586
01:17:43,315 --> 01:17:44,315
Me, I think.
1587
01:17:44,849 --> 01:17:47,185
- You idiot!
- I didn't know she was gonna do that.
1588
01:17:47,252 --> 01:17:48,420
[gunshot]
1589
01:17:48,486 --> 01:17:49,854
[grunts]
1590
01:17:49,921 --> 01:17:50,989
No!
1591
01:17:51,156 --> 01:17:52,224
Patricia!
1592
01:17:53,725 --> 01:17:54,960
Patricia, Patricia.
1593
01:17:55,160 --> 01:17:56,160
Richard.
1594
01:17:57,223 --> 01:17:58,452
I'm so sorry.
1595
01:17:58,672 --> 01:17:59,983
No, I'm sorry.
1596
01:18:00,498 --> 01:18:02,500
I never knew
you wrote me all those letters.
1597
01:18:02,767 --> 01:18:04,102
Shh. That doesn't matter now.
1598
01:18:04,169 --> 01:18:05,770
Clive hid them from me.
1599
01:18:05,837 --> 01:18:07,327
What a wanker.
1600
01:18:08,312 --> 01:18:10,208
I'm sorry that I never believed you.
1601
01:18:10,515 --> 01:18:11,827
I'm sorry.
1602
01:18:13,749 --> 01:18:15,382
I love you, Richard.
1603
01:18:16,414 --> 01:18:18,624
[coughing]
1604
01:18:22,343 --> 01:18:23,922
Fucking hell.
1605
01:18:23,989 --> 01:18:25,819
Where's the tape, Richard?
1606
01:18:28,293 --> 01:18:29,921
There is no tape.
1607
01:18:30,972 --> 01:18:32,210
It's fake.
1608
01:18:32,437 --> 01:18:34,382
Like everything else in my life!
1609
01:18:35,133 --> 01:18:37,002
Without her, I may as well be dead.
1610
01:18:37,068 --> 01:18:38,870
[Richard groaning]
1611
01:18:39,373 --> 01:18:41,147
Just a figure of speech.
1612
01:18:44,142 --> 01:18:45,529
Why?
1613
01:18:46,732 --> 01:18:48,123
Why?
1614
01:18:49,979 --> 01:18:53,584
The mayor's my uncle...
so I've gotta clean up his mess.
1615
01:18:54,512 --> 01:18:56,154
Family's family.
1616
01:18:57,537 --> 01:18:59,057
My family runs Man.
1617
01:18:59,124 --> 01:19:00,670
Call an ambulance.
1618
01:19:00,865 --> 01:19:02,194
It's not too late.
1619
01:19:02,327 --> 01:19:03,467
I can forget.
1620
01:19:03,613 --> 01:19:06,694
- What, that I killed Moncrief?
- Yeah, that.
1621
01:19:10,264 --> 01:19:12,850
I... I can pretend I don't know that.
1622
01:19:12,978 --> 01:19:14,342
I can pretend.
1623
01:19:14,689 --> 01:19:17,248
- You're not that good an actor.
- [Richard grunts]
1624
01:19:22,909 --> 01:19:24,295
[man] Baines!
1625
01:19:24,983 --> 01:19:26,162
You all right?
1626
01:19:26,384 --> 01:19:28,069
He shot Pat!
1627
01:19:28,740 --> 01:19:31,381
He killed her
and then he tried to kill me and I, uh...
1628
01:19:31,514 --> 01:19:32,891
[sirens wailing]
1629
01:19:32,957 --> 01:19:34,359
I had to take him down!
1630
01:19:34,426 --> 01:19:36,885
I had to take him down!
1631
01:19:40,283 --> 01:19:41,713
- Baines?
- Chief.
1632
01:19:42,143 --> 01:19:44,416
There was nothing I could do. It was...
1633
01:19:44,712 --> 01:19:46,541
There was nothing I could do.
1634
01:19:50,355 --> 01:19:51,932
Nice working with you again.
1635
01:19:52,609 --> 01:19:54,612
What's going on, Thorncroft?
1636
01:19:55,113 --> 01:19:56,881
[Baines on recording]
The mayor's my uncle,
1637
01:19:56,948 --> 01:19:58,125
so I've gotta clean up his mess.
1638
01:19:58,149 --> 01:20:00,061
- [Richard] I can forget.
- [Baines]That I killed Moncrief?
1639
01:20:00,085 --> 01:20:02,020
- Yeah.
- You're not that good an actor.
1640
01:20:02,087 --> 01:20:03,087
Aren't I?
1641
01:20:03,288 --> 01:20:04,638
Heh.
1642
01:20:06,019 --> 01:20:07,401
- [Clive] Oh, hey, now.
- [Jasmine] Mom.
1643
01:20:07,425 --> 01:20:09,225
- [Clive] Hey, hey. Not cool.
- [Pat] Jasmine.
1644
01:20:09,294 --> 01:20:12,707
- Both sets of keys, give them to me.
- Think about what you're doing.
1645
01:20:12,855 --> 01:20:14,636
Keys now. Do it or I'll blow her away.
1646
01:20:14,746 --> 01:20:17,761
Get your filthy hands off my daughter.
1647
01:20:18,103 --> 01:20:20,504
[laughing] She's not your daughter.
1648
01:20:20,939 --> 01:20:23,191
She's Windjammer's daughter.
1649
01:20:23,942 --> 01:20:25,652
[Pat] Clive, do something.
1650
01:20:25,877 --> 01:20:28,902
- I'm not wearing the appropriate footwear.
- Stand down, Clive.
1651
01:20:29,147 --> 01:20:31,207
It's time I did my own stunts.
1652
01:20:38,390 --> 01:20:39,765
It's Ginga time.
1653
01:20:55,543 --> 01:20:56,942
This...
1654
01:20:57,575 --> 01:21:00,378
is the Ginga.
1655
01:21:01,012 --> 01:21:02,614
[gun shots]
1656
01:21:02,680 --> 01:21:04,149
[shouting]
1657
01:21:04,379 --> 01:21:06,281
[gun shots continue]
1658
01:21:10,792 --> 01:21:15,124
I'm moving between the air.
1659
01:21:22,333 --> 01:21:24,135
I'm here.
1660
01:21:26,504 --> 01:21:30,442
I'm the bringer of the Ginga!
1661
01:21:33,044 --> 01:21:34,849
And that's capoeira.
1662
01:21:38,804 --> 01:21:40,169
Jas.
1663
01:21:42,325 --> 01:21:43,888
The mayor was her uncle.
1664
01:21:44,044 --> 01:21:45,896
Seems I was right
about the limited gene pool.
1665
01:21:46,011 --> 01:21:47,536
[both laughing]
1666
01:21:47,725 --> 01:21:50,261
I am sorry
that I rode you so hard back then.
1667
01:21:50,328 --> 01:21:52,841
I hope we can put our differences
behind us.
1668
01:21:52,927 --> 01:21:54,052
I will if you will.
1669
01:21:54,122 --> 01:21:57,502
And, if it helps at all,
I was pretty wasted all those years ago.
1670
01:21:57,771 --> 01:21:59,786
I don't even remember
that night with your wife.
1671
01:21:59,986 --> 01:22:02,583
- What night with my wife?
- That's the spirit.
1672
01:22:03,483 --> 01:22:07,224
Oh, my God, Richard, that was so brave.
It's a miracle that you weren't shot.
1673
01:22:07,411 --> 01:22:09,981
Ah, no more lies. I have to be honest.
1674
01:22:10,048 --> 01:22:12,114
I knew there were blanks in that gun.
1675
01:22:12,229 --> 01:22:14,396
Um... No, no, this is Baines' gun.
1676
01:22:14,552 --> 01:22:16,489
That was live ammunition.
1677
01:22:19,680 --> 01:22:21,169
[Pat] Richard.
1678
01:22:22,369 --> 01:22:23,763
I've got you.
1679
01:22:24,462 --> 01:22:26,239
You've got me, all right.
1680
01:22:27,177 --> 01:22:28,778
And that is the truth.
1681
01:22:29,033 --> 01:22:30,419
[chuckles]
1682
01:22:32,208 --> 01:22:36,033
♪♪
Synchronized by srjanapala
1683
01:22:36,057 --> 01:22:39,877
♪♪
1684
01:22:39,901 --> 01:22:43,713
♪♪
1685
01:22:43,830 --> 01:22:47,759
♪♪
1686
01:24:42,068 --> 01:24:45,435
♪♪ "Can't Handcuff the Wind" playing...
1687
01:24:45,638 --> 01:24:49,506
♪♪
1688
01:24:49,600 --> 01:24:53,490
♪♪
1689
01:24:54,137 --> 01:24:56,506
♪ We had some fun together ♪
1690
01:24:56,575 --> 01:25:01,076
♪ But I never
I never promised you forever ♪
1691
01:25:01,107 --> 01:25:02,189
♪♪
1692
01:25:02,253 --> 01:25:03,365
♪ No, no, no ♪
1693
01:25:03,390 --> 01:25:04,412
♪♪
1694
01:25:04,459 --> 01:25:08,302
♪ You can't handcuff the wind ♪
1695
01:25:08,418 --> 01:25:11,443
♪ But if you try, you're gonna fail ♪
1696
01:25:11,467 --> 01:25:12,872
♪♪
1697
01:25:12,897 --> 01:25:16,162
♪ It's like trying
To put thunder in jail ♪
1698
01:25:16,269 --> 01:25:19,473
♪ You can't handcuff the wind ♪
1699
01:25:19,497 --> 01:25:20,637
♪♪
1700
01:25:20,638 --> 01:25:23,441
♪ But if you try, you're gonna fail ♪
1701
01:25:23,465 --> 01:25:24,998
♪♪
1702
01:25:25,076 --> 01:25:28,412
♪ It's like trying
To put thunder in jail ♪
1703
01:25:28,506 --> 01:25:30,281
♪ You can't handcuff the wind ♪
1704
01:25:30,355 --> 01:25:32,896
♪ I feel the pull of the open road ♪
1705
01:25:32,974 --> 01:25:36,029
♪ I'm headin' out into the night ♪
1706
01:25:36,220 --> 01:25:38,724
♪ Gotta loosen up your grip, girl ♪
1707
01:25:38,823 --> 01:25:41,920
♪ You're holding on a little too tight ♪
1708
01:25:42,043 --> 01:25:44,709
♪ We roll the dice
We played the game ♪
1709
01:25:44,862 --> 01:25:47,873
♪ Now every card's been turned ♪
1710
01:25:47,955 --> 01:25:53,327
♪ Girl, if you're trying to hold onto fire
You're gonna get burned ♪
1711
01:25:53,473 --> 01:25:56,287
♪ You can't handcuff the wind ♪
1712
01:25:56,474 --> 01:25:59,146
♪ And if you try, you're gonna fail ♪
1713
01:25:59,170 --> 01:26:00,977
♪♪
1714
01:26:01,060 --> 01:26:04,427
♪ It's like tryin'
To put thunder in jail ♪
1715
01:26:04,582 --> 01:26:06,170
♪ You can't handcuff the wind ♪
1716
01:26:06,225 --> 01:26:08,293
♪ And if you're trying to fence me in ♪
1717
01:26:08,437 --> 01:26:12,834
♪ I'll break down those fences
And run like a stallion in the night ♪
1718
01:26:12,943 --> 01:26:16,287
♪ I'm gonna burn so bright
Like a white hot flame ♪
1719
01:26:16,374 --> 01:26:19,271
♪ Till everybody knows my name ♪
1720
01:26:19,295 --> 01:26:23,146
♪♪
1721
01:26:23,209 --> 01:26:27,060
♪♪
1722
01:26:27,084 --> 01:26:29,896
♪♪
1723
01:26:30,006 --> 01:26:32,643
♪ The open road, she calls my name ♪
1724
01:26:32,710 --> 01:26:36,146
♪ There's itching in my feet ♪
1725
01:26:36,280 --> 01:26:38,638
♪ I got an engine that you can't tame ♪
1726
01:26:38,712 --> 01:26:40,881
♪ Even with your mouth so sweet ♪
1727
01:26:40,905 --> 01:26:42,240
♪♪
1728
01:26:42,290 --> 01:26:44,459
♪ A thousand kisses and sad goodbyes ♪
1729
01:26:44,589 --> 01:26:46,824
♪ But it's too late for any more ♪
1730
01:26:46,848 --> 01:26:47,891
♪♪
1731
01:26:47,892 --> 01:26:50,528
♪ The ferry to the mainland
Leaves at six ♪
1732
01:26:50,595 --> 01:26:52,930
♪ I gotta be there 20 minutes before ♪
1733
01:26:52,997 --> 01:26:56,451
♪ You can't handcuff the wind ♪
1734
01:26:56,532 --> 01:26:59,335
♪ And if you try, you're gonna fail ♪
1735
01:26:59,359 --> 01:27:00,935
♪♪
1736
01:27:01,038 --> 01:27:04,474
♪ It's like trying
To put thunder in jail ♪
1737
01:27:04,642 --> 01:27:07,445
♪ You can't handcuff the wind ♪
1738
01:27:07,531 --> 01:27:10,527
♪♪
1739
01:27:10,586 --> 01:27:14,387
♪♪