1 00:00:08,250 --> 00:00:18,250 ♪ Rhythm Of Life (1989) ♪ by Hugh Harris 2 00:01:25,085 --> 00:01:27,254 Get your bag off the table. People eat there. 3 00:01:27,838 --> 00:01:29,339 They eat on plates. 4 00:01:29,548 --> 00:01:31,174 Don't give me any crap Maizy. 5 00:01:31,675 --> 00:01:33,427 I'm telling. You said "crap." 6 00:01:33,510 --> 00:01:35,262 There's nothing wrong with crap. 7 00:01:35,345 --> 00:01:37,264 Oh really? I thought that was a swear. 8 00:01:37,848 --> 00:01:39,266 No you're thinking of shit. 9 00:01:39,349 --> 00:01:40,642 Oh right. 10 00:01:43,604 --> 00:01:45,522 Do you mind? 11 00:01:45,606 --> 00:01:48,442 A sixth grader chased me on his bike, and I was running. 12 00:01:48,525 --> 00:01:51,945 When I got exhausted and fell down, he whaled me with his shoe. 13 00:01:52,362 --> 00:01:53,864 Thank your parents for that. 14 00:01:53,947 --> 00:01:56,658 How come? It was their brilliant idea to move here. 15 00:01:56,742 --> 00:01:59,286 They weren't making enough cash in Indianapolis. 16 00:01:59,369 --> 00:02:01,622 Forget that we were perfectly happy. 17 00:02:01,705 --> 00:02:03,790 So thank them for getting treated like shit every day. 18 00:02:03,874 --> 00:02:05,709 I'm telling on that one. 19 00:02:05,876 --> 00:02:07,419 Shut your face. 20 00:02:12,674 --> 00:02:14,801 Your book bag doesn't go on the floor. 21 00:02:14,885 --> 00:02:16,720 Oh let's have a cow. 22 00:02:18,221 --> 00:02:20,599 Your nails are digging to my arm, God damn it! 23 00:02:20,682 --> 00:02:22,059 Pick it up. 24 00:02:23,644 --> 00:02:25,854 You're just supposed to open the door for us. 25 00:02:25,937 --> 00:02:27,898 You're not supposed to kick us around. 26 00:02:27,981 --> 00:02:30,150 I'm an American, I have rights. 27 00:02:30,275 --> 00:02:31,902 Maizy, did I kick you around? 28 00:02:31,985 --> 00:02:34,196 No, but you said "shit" twice. 29 00:02:34,404 --> 00:02:35,906 But only once for real. 30 00:02:36,573 --> 00:02:39,993 I've got better things to do than babysit you, you little stain. 31 00:02:40,077 --> 00:02:43,288 Oh like what? Hang out with friends you don't have? 32 00:02:43,372 --> 00:02:45,999 Why don't you just shut up? 33 00:02:46,249 --> 00:02:47,876 Wanna to make me? 34 00:02:48,794 --> 00:02:53,500 When our mother figure isn't here, I'm in charge. 35 00:02:53,882 --> 00:02:57,052 I'm sick of you calling her that! Too bad. 36 00:02:59,096 --> 00:03:00,430 You moron! 37 00:03:01,139 --> 00:03:04,518 I don't know why we need boys at all. They're so loud. 38 00:03:04,601 --> 00:03:07,104 Shut up! Shut up yourself! 39 00:03:07,270 --> 00:03:13,275 We need boys, so they can grow up, get married, and turn into shadows. 40 00:03:15,821 --> 00:03:17,450 Let the dog out. 41 00:03:17,781 --> 00:03:19,449 Percy! 42 00:03:32,671 --> 00:03:35,090 This is such a wonderful dinner Mother. 43 00:03:35,173 --> 00:03:37,134 How do you find the time? 44 00:03:40,000 --> 00:03:41,700 Mmm, Miles. 45 00:03:43,181 --> 00:03:44,975 Maizy put that down. 46 00:03:45,684 --> 00:03:47,394 Did you win in hockey yesterday? 47 00:03:47,811 --> 00:03:49,615 Hockey's been over for two weeks. 48 00:03:54,985 --> 00:03:58,238 I guess you don't want a hockey stick for your birthday. 49 00:04:04,494 --> 00:04:06,050 Mmm you know what? 50 00:04:07,164 --> 00:04:11,968 When Dad goes to New York, I'm going to take a week off work. 51 00:04:12,127 --> 00:04:14,087 So you can interview new housekeepers? 52 00:04:15,213 --> 00:04:17,174 I've had enough of your ugliness. 53 00:04:17,799 --> 00:04:19,250 Oh really? Mmm-hmm. 54 00:04:20,594 --> 00:04:23,575 We're all just a little tired of the act. 55 00:04:39,321 --> 00:04:42,199 This was a really good idea. Thank you. 56 00:04:43,116 --> 00:04:45,494 How's that pie? Not bad. 57 00:04:47,370 --> 00:04:49,372 You gonna be at work in the morning? 58 00:04:50,707 --> 00:04:52,375 I don't see how I can avoid it. 59 00:04:52,709 --> 00:04:54,800 You don't seem very happy about it. 60 00:04:55,378 --> 00:04:57,047 All right, if you gotta know... 61 00:04:57,881 --> 00:05:00,375 I'm really not that excited about working for my girlfriend. 62 00:05:00,425 --> 00:05:02,427 There, I said it. It's out of the way. 63 00:05:03,178 --> 00:05:06,014 Okay, okay. Buck I love you. I can't help myself. 64 00:05:06,097 --> 00:05:07,849 I wanna get married, I wanna have a family. 65 00:05:07,933 --> 00:05:09,392 I wanna do it with you. 66 00:05:09,476 --> 00:05:11,436 Well you know, the clock is ticking away here. 67 00:05:11,520 --> 00:05:15,315 I would just like to hear the pitter-patter of tiny feet before I die. 68 00:05:15,398 --> 00:05:18,360 I'll get you a mouse and a piece of sheet metal. 69 00:05:20,237 --> 00:05:21,404 Come on, lighten up, will ya? 70 00:05:21,488 --> 00:05:23,406 Don't push my button. I'm not gonna get into this. 71 00:05:23,490 --> 00:05:25,116 I'm not pushing your buttons. 72 00:05:25,200 --> 00:05:27,494 I know me, I know what I like. 73 00:05:27,577 --> 00:05:31,081 All right? I like, my friends. I like my freedom. 74 00:05:31,665 --> 00:05:36,336 I like knowing I can throw my sticks in the trunk of my car and go golfing anytime I want. 75 00:05:36,419 --> 00:05:38,964 I don't hurt anybody. I don't see what the problem is. 76 00:05:39,047 --> 00:05:42,050 That's the best formula for loneliness I ever heard. 77 00:05:42,509 --> 00:05:44,052 Why are we arguing? 78 00:05:44,135 --> 00:05:45,220 We're talking. 79 00:05:45,303 --> 00:05:47,931 I said I'd be at work in the morning. I'll be there. 80 00:05:49,224 --> 00:05:50,508 Okay. 81 00:05:54,062 --> 00:05:56,189 I... I-I-I just gotta get this out. 82 00:05:56,273 --> 00:05:59,276 I mean, I know I'm kinda like harping on something here, but you know, 83 00:05:59,359 --> 00:06:01,027 just let me say it. I mean, you know, I am... 84 00:06:01,111 --> 00:06:02,863 I'm working on history. I'm working on the past. 85 00:06:02,946 --> 00:06:04,656 You're gonna show up for work, you swear to God? 86 00:06:04,739 --> 00:06:06,533 In the A.M.? Promise? 87 00:06:06,616 --> 00:06:08,535 Chanice, I'll be honest with you... 88 00:06:08,618 --> 00:06:11,162 If I could think of an excuse that you would buy, 89 00:06:11,246 --> 00:06:12,489 I'd use it. 90 00:06:27,679 --> 00:06:28,847 Hello. 91 00:06:33,310 --> 00:06:35,979 Oh God. What? 92 00:06:36,104 --> 00:06:37,606 Just a second. 93 00:06:37,731 --> 00:06:40,066 It's your aunt. What happened? 94 00:06:40,817 --> 00:06:42,944 Your Dad had a heart attack. 95 00:06:47,157 --> 00:06:49,367 Who's going to watch the kids? 96 00:06:50,619 --> 00:06:53,204 Marcie. She's right across the street. 97 00:06:53,413 --> 00:06:56,082 She's the last person I'd ask for a favor. 98 00:06:58,084 --> 00:07:00,045 What about the uhh, Nevilles? 99 00:07:02,923 --> 00:07:04,591 Would you call them? 100 00:07:04,674 --> 00:07:07,093 I want to leave as soon as we can. 101 00:07:09,137 --> 00:07:11,014 I am so helpless here. 102 00:07:11,431 --> 00:07:14,851 Honey, now don't start getting down on why we moved. 103 00:07:15,352 --> 00:07:17,520 It has nothing to do with what happened. 104 00:07:17,604 --> 00:07:18,772 Sorry. 105 00:07:21,691 --> 00:07:23,860 Now, this is just a thought. 106 00:07:24,027 --> 00:07:25,362 What about Buck? 107 00:07:25,445 --> 00:07:27,447 Now I'm sure he'd be glad to help out. 108 00:07:28,281 --> 00:07:32,535 This is not the time to discuss your brother. I don't want him here. 109 00:07:33,036 --> 00:07:34,287 It's just a suggestion. 110 00:07:34,371 --> 00:07:37,874 He doesn't have kids. He isn't married. He doesn't even work! 111 00:07:39,876 --> 00:07:44,089 He's a little out there, but he's responsible, and he's family. 112 00:07:44,381 --> 00:07:49,260 Buck is not the kind of guy I feel comfortable leaving my kids with. 113 00:07:49,761 --> 00:07:52,097 The trashy people he hangs out with. 114 00:07:52,180 --> 00:07:55,058 The, that woman who sells tires. 115 00:07:55,392 --> 00:07:57,936 The horse racing. The gambling. 116 00:07:58,019 --> 00:08:00,146 Can you see him in this house? 117 00:08:00,230 --> 00:08:01,272 Okay. 118 00:08:05,151 --> 00:08:06,820 Call the Nevilles. 119 00:08:11,574 --> 00:08:12,909 Are we going to Indianapolis? 120 00:08:14,285 --> 00:08:15,812 Daddy and I are. 121 00:08:16,579 --> 00:08:18,081 And we're not? 122 00:08:19,290 --> 00:08:21,459 No. I don't think that would be a good idea. 123 00:08:24,421 --> 00:08:25,588 Thanks. 124 00:08:26,589 --> 00:08:28,633 I love my father very much. 125 00:08:29,175 --> 00:08:31,052 So why did you move away from him? 126 00:08:34,597 --> 00:08:38,101 If my whole family moved away from me I'd have a heart attack too. 127 00:08:44,899 --> 00:08:46,276 Oh I see. 128 00:08:48,862 --> 00:08:51,281 Who's gonna take care of us? Mr. and Mrs. Neville. 129 00:08:51,406 --> 00:08:53,950 Is that a joke? You don't like the Nevilles? 130 00:08:54,200 --> 00:08:55,952 Their dog's a ball sniffer. 131 00:08:56,119 --> 00:08:57,620 Don't talk like that. 132 00:08:57,704 --> 00:09:01,875 Mr. Neville yelled at Michael Larson, because the dog was sniffing Michael's balls. 133 00:09:01,958 --> 00:09:02,959 Don't use that word. 134 00:09:03,043 --> 00:09:04,252 I don't know another word. 135 00:09:04,461 --> 00:09:06,796 Well, I'm sure we can talk to Mr. Neville about the dog. 136 00:09:06,880 --> 00:09:09,632 Sorry honey. They're in Florida. 137 00:09:12,635 --> 00:09:15,972 Okay. You get in bed. You have to get up for school. 138 00:09:17,015 --> 00:09:19,517 Who's in Florida? Just get back in bed. 139 00:09:19,601 --> 00:09:21,561 What's another word for "balls"? 140 00:09:21,978 --> 00:09:23,313 Get in bed. 141 00:09:26,191 --> 00:09:27,400 "Nuts." 142 00:09:31,237 --> 00:09:32,489 What do we do? 143 00:09:33,073 --> 00:09:34,824 I don't think we have much choice. 144 00:09:37,118 --> 00:09:38,161 Can we trust him? 145 00:09:40,997 --> 00:09:42,082 Yeah? 146 00:09:42,832 --> 00:09:44,334 Buck, this is Bob. 147 00:09:44,501 --> 00:09:45,585 Bob. 148 00:09:46,294 --> 00:09:47,295 Bob who? 149 00:09:50,048 --> 00:09:51,966 Buck, it's your brother. 150 00:09:53,593 --> 00:09:54,761 Bobby. 151 00:09:55,345 --> 00:09:57,347 Bobby, hang on a minute. 152 00:10:19,077 --> 00:10:21,037 Bobby, I just used your Christmas present. 153 00:10:21,371 --> 00:10:23,123 Oh, the Clapper. 154 00:10:23,206 --> 00:10:26,375 Bobby you little pissant, how ya doing? Huh? 155 00:10:27,085 --> 00:10:29,403 Jeez. What are ya drunk? 156 00:10:31,172 --> 00:10:34,008 Hey, you know something? We gotta get together. 157 00:10:34,092 --> 00:10:36,575 I haven't been over to your house since you moved in. 158 00:10:36,970 --> 00:10:40,140 Hey... I-I-I'm real sorry about those bushes too. 159 00:10:40,223 --> 00:10:42,900 I had no idea they would all catch on fire like that. 160 00:10:44,018 --> 00:10:46,900 Ya know, you were right. I should never have put the barbecue that close. 161 00:10:47,438 --> 00:10:50,391 Buck, Cindy's father had a heart attack tonight. 162 00:10:51,317 --> 00:10:53,987 We'd like to get down to Indianapolis as soon as possible, 163 00:10:54,070 --> 00:10:56,600 but uhh, well we have a problem with the kids. 164 00:10:56,739 --> 00:10:59,100 We're stuck for somebody to watch them. 165 00:10:59,492 --> 00:11:01,077 If you're not doing anything... 166 00:11:01,161 --> 00:11:04,405 Is this uhh, okay with Cindy? This has got her approval on it? 167 00:11:05,290 --> 00:11:06,332 Oh yeah. 168 00:11:06,875 --> 00:11:10,086 That would be great! That'll be... I'd be honored, sure! 169 00:11:10,170 --> 00:11:13,673 I've still got the one bedroom, ya know, I'm gonna get a bigger place, but uhh... 170 00:11:13,756 --> 00:11:15,728 but hey, they bring their uhh sleeping bags over here, 171 00:11:15,758 --> 00:11:18,052 we'll have some fun. We'll make tents and stuff. 172 00:11:18,136 --> 00:11:21,014 We'll get some toys and some peanut butter. Ya know... 173 00:11:21,097 --> 00:11:23,141 I thought you could come here. Uhh.. 174 00:11:23,224 --> 00:11:24,684 The kids have school. 175 00:11:24,767 --> 00:11:26,895 What am I thinking about? Uhh sure. 176 00:11:26,978 --> 00:11:28,980 Do we wanna do this tonight or in the morning? 177 00:11:29,063 --> 00:11:31,191 Tonight would be best, I mean if you could do it. 178 00:11:31,274 --> 00:11:32,609 Yeah. Tonight will be fine. 179 00:11:32,692 --> 00:11:35,069 That'll be fine. Don't worry about it. 180 00:11:35,153 --> 00:11:37,238 I'll pack a few things. I'm on my way. 181 00:11:37,322 --> 00:11:38,865 Thanks. See you soon. 182 00:11:41,451 --> 00:11:42,911 He can do it. 183 00:11:43,036 --> 00:11:45,955 He was uhh, asleep and, I woke him up. 184 00:11:47,040 --> 00:11:49,417 At this hour, that's a good sign. 185 00:11:50,251 --> 00:11:51,753 We're all set. 186 00:11:59,469 --> 00:12:01,971 Okay. This, and this, and this. 187 00:12:06,267 --> 00:12:08,144 Bag, bag, bag. 188 00:12:08,394 --> 00:12:09,437 Okay. 189 00:12:10,188 --> 00:12:11,981 This one will do. This... 190 00:12:13,100 --> 00:12:14,300 Ohhh! 191 00:12:18,200 --> 00:12:19,400 Uhhh! 192 00:12:23,660 --> 00:12:24,702 Hello. 193 00:12:24,786 --> 00:12:26,612 Chanice? Honey? 194 00:12:27,830 --> 00:12:30,000 Honey, I have some bad news. 195 00:12:30,458 --> 00:12:31,918 Let me guess. 196 00:12:32,418 --> 00:12:34,900 You are not coming in to work in the morning. 197 00:12:38,132 --> 00:12:39,217 Just let... 198 00:12:39,300 --> 00:12:40,385 Let... 199 00:12:40,400 --> 00:12:41,125 Ge... 200 00:12:41,344 --> 00:12:42,345 No but... 201 00:12:42,470 --> 00:12:43,429 You don't... 202 00:12:43,513 --> 00:12:45,150 Would you just... Let me... 203 00:12:45,515 --> 00:12:46,500 Give me... 204 00:12:46,750 --> 00:12:47,750 Let me g... 205 00:12:47,950 --> 00:12:48,850 Let me ge... 206 00:12:49,352 --> 00:12:50,520 You're not... 207 00:12:50,603 --> 00:12:52,550 Give me a... Awww... 208 00:12:52,814 --> 00:12:54,023 Good bye. 209 00:12:57,026 --> 00:13:00,405 Oh boy, those kids. I haven't seen those kids in a while. 210 00:13:02,031 --> 00:13:03,533 Tia's got to be 9 now. 211 00:13:04,242 --> 00:13:06,703 9, maybe 10. Oh boy. 212 00:13:07,495 --> 00:13:09,555 And the two new ones, they're uhh... 213 00:13:10,957 --> 00:13:12,598 Larry and uhh... 214 00:13:14,043 --> 00:13:15,719 Larry and uhh... 215 00:13:18,006 --> 00:13:19,048 Betsy. 216 00:13:19,132 --> 00:13:20,550 Betsy uhh... 217 00:13:22,176 --> 00:13:24,053 Jennifer, Jennifer. 218 00:13:24,595 --> 00:13:26,764 Larry and Jennifer. Nice kids. 219 00:13:32,770 --> 00:13:36,400 Honey, he's 40 years old. He knows his way around. 220 00:13:37,066 --> 00:13:42,075 Look, why don't you go finish packing, and I'll uhh, I'll watch out for Buck. 221 00:14:04,135 --> 00:14:08,100 What the hell? Where is everybody? 222 00:14:16,606 --> 00:14:17,690 Bob! 223 00:14:19,275 --> 00:14:20,460 Bob? 224 00:14:21,778 --> 00:14:24,850 This isn't funny! Come on, wake up! 225 00:14:25,239 --> 00:14:27,158 I'm freezing my ass off out here! 226 00:14:27,241 --> 00:14:28,985 Oh, shit. 227 00:14:29,702 --> 00:14:31,287 Come on, I'm getting mad Bob. 228 00:14:33,623 --> 00:14:34,957 Yo Bobby! 229 00:14:35,124 --> 00:14:36,709 Buck? Bob? 230 00:14:36,793 --> 00:14:38,086 Buck! Bob? 231 00:14:38,169 --> 00:14:39,629 Buck! Bob? 232 00:14:39,712 --> 00:14:40,963 Over here! 233 00:14:49,389 --> 00:14:52,800 You have any idea how many big white houses there are on this street? 234 00:14:53,200 --> 00:14:54,350 Shhh. 235 00:14:54,519 --> 00:14:57,063 What? Keep it down. 236 00:14:57,146 --> 00:15:00,316 What? What do you want me to do with my car? 237 00:15:00,400 --> 00:15:02,300 For crying out loud! 238 00:15:02,500 --> 00:15:05,905 Oh uhh, Sorry Mr. Hatfield! It's 2:00 a.m.! 239 00:15:05,988 --> 00:15:07,490 How you doing? 240 00:15:08,032 --> 00:15:10,350 Hey, sorry I'm late. Oh no, hey, come in. 241 00:15:10,375 --> 00:15:11,900 Hey what happened to the mustache? Thanks for coming. 242 00:15:12,000 --> 00:15:13,000 Oh uhh, hah... 243 00:15:13,162 --> 00:15:14,747 Had to shave it off. How's Cindy? 244 00:15:14,831 --> 00:15:17,075 Not well, not well. Her dad? Hard to say. 245 00:15:17,125 --> 00:15:18,395 All those medical terms huh? 246 00:15:18,418 --> 00:15:20,370 What is it an infarction or something like that? 247 00:15:28,886 --> 00:15:31,097 Hey, I-I stopped smoking cigarettes. 248 00:15:31,180 --> 00:15:33,307 Oh good. Isn't that something? 249 00:15:33,683 --> 00:15:37,019 I'm on to cigars now. I'm onto a five-year plan. 250 00:15:37,103 --> 00:15:39,605 I eliminated the cigarettes, then I go to cigars, then I go to pipes, 251 00:15:39,689 --> 00:15:43,067 then to chewing tobacco, then I'm onto that nicotine gum. 252 00:15:43,818 --> 00:15:44,902 Good. 253 00:15:45,736 --> 00:15:46,863 Yeah. 254 00:15:47,850 --> 00:15:50,325 Uhh money. I'll leave you blank checks. 255 00:15:50,408 --> 00:15:52,800 Oh no, no, please. I've got lots of money. 256 00:15:53,035 --> 00:15:55,371 No! No, please. 257 00:15:55,455 --> 00:15:56,873 No. Look, I've got the money. 258 00:15:56,956 --> 00:15:58,791 Please, I'd like to do this, all right? 259 00:15:58,875 --> 00:15:59,917 So uhh... No. 260 00:16:00,001 --> 00:16:01,335 No, come on, will ya? Please... Okay. 261 00:16:01,419 --> 00:16:03,337 I'll pay you back when we get home. 262 00:16:07,508 --> 00:16:12,680 I-I won't have any problems cashing a uhh a second-party out-of-state paycheck, will I? 263 00:16:12,763 --> 00:16:15,349 The reason I'm saying is, I've been so busy lately, 264 00:16:15,433 --> 00:16:17,518 I haven't been able to do my banking, and uhh... 265 00:16:17,602 --> 00:16:19,103 I don't think there will be a problem. Don't worry about it. 266 00:16:19,187 --> 00:16:20,438 Let me just leave you the checks. 267 00:16:20,521 --> 00:16:22,315 Well, only if it's comfortable for you. 268 00:16:22,398 --> 00:16:24,800 That'll be easier. I guess, sure. 269 00:16:24,817 --> 00:16:28,613 Do you have a plunger here? While I'm thinking of these things, uhh. 270 00:16:29,071 --> 00:16:31,491 For the morning, you know? My plumbing is just so bad. 271 00:16:31,574 --> 00:16:33,415 Of course, yours is of course good plumbing here right? 272 00:16:33,493 --> 00:16:35,536 Yeah, I would imagine... Yes don't worry about it. 273 00:16:35,620 --> 00:16:37,413 You know, everything will be fine. 274 00:16:37,497 --> 00:16:40,082 Just been bound up lately. It's uhh, it's driving me crazy. 275 00:16:40,166 --> 00:16:42,001 I've been eating a lot of cheese for some reason. 276 00:16:42,084 --> 00:16:44,837 I don't know what it is, I've got a craving for the stuff. 277 00:16:44,921 --> 00:16:47,340 Think maybe that's an allergy or something? 278 00:16:47,423 --> 00:16:48,508 Yeah. 279 00:16:48,591 --> 00:16:50,676 I don't know. I can't get enough cheese. 280 00:16:50,760 --> 00:16:52,553 I feel like a big mouse. 281 00:16:54,138 --> 00:16:56,390 I don't know. Ah, well. Ah, well. 282 00:16:56,599 --> 00:16:58,200 Uh let's see... Oh! 283 00:16:58,935 --> 00:17:00,561 Oh Miles' birthday. 284 00:17:01,187 --> 00:17:03,606 Oh forget that. We'll be back by that time. 285 00:17:03,731 --> 00:17:05,149 Okay then. 286 00:17:05,274 --> 00:17:07,652 I think this should do. I probably won't use any of them. You know. 287 00:17:07,735 --> 00:17:09,195 Just in case. 288 00:17:09,779 --> 00:17:12,073 Right. Great. Okay. 289 00:17:20,998 --> 00:17:22,625 Here we go. I know I've forgotten something. 290 00:17:22,708 --> 00:17:24,293 Just put... What else? What else? What else? 291 00:17:24,377 --> 00:17:25,753 Right up. There you go. All right? 292 00:17:25,836 --> 00:17:27,630 Okay, that looks nice. 293 00:17:27,964 --> 00:17:30,049 Here give me your arm. There ya go. 294 00:17:30,132 --> 00:17:32,718 This should only be a few days, and I promise I'll call you, I'll call you tomorrow. 295 00:17:32,802 --> 00:17:34,512 You got all the phone numbers right? Yeah. 296 00:17:34,595 --> 00:17:35,888 Okay. Well we're off. 297 00:17:35,972 --> 00:17:37,390 All right, you take care of yourself. Thanks a lot Buck. 298 00:17:37,473 --> 00:17:39,100 Okay, all right. We really appreciate it. 299 00:17:39,183 --> 00:17:40,601 Thanks. Thanks. All right. 300 00:17:40,685 --> 00:17:41,852 Thank you. 301 00:17:41,936 --> 00:17:43,729 Say hi to your dad for me. You can do it. 302 00:17:43,813 --> 00:17:44,850 Drive safe, all right? Okay now. 303 00:17:44,873 --> 00:17:46,941 Thanks. Okay. 304 00:18:11,048 --> 00:18:12,883 Boy, that's for sure. 305 00:18:27,607 --> 00:18:29,025 Unbreakable. 306 00:18:31,500 --> 00:18:35,300 ♪ Tweedlee Dee (1954) ♪ by La Vern Baker 307 00:18:35,740 --> 00:18:36,907 Shit. 308 00:18:39,160 --> 00:18:43,456 It's 7:02 in the A.M., you're listening to W-l-don't-have -to-go-to-work-today, 309 00:18:43,539 --> 00:18:45,124 brought to you by Kobolowski Tires. 310 00:18:45,207 --> 00:18:47,752 For the best in tires, see Chanice Kobolowski. 311 00:19:19,283 --> 00:19:20,484 Tia! 312 00:19:23,913 --> 00:19:25,498 You remember me? 313 00:19:29,919 --> 00:19:31,253 Uncle Buck. 314 00:19:32,004 --> 00:19:33,547 The Uncle Buck. 315 00:19:42,723 --> 00:19:43,974 Coffee drinker huh? 316 00:19:59,782 --> 00:20:00,908 Hungry? 317 00:20:00,991 --> 00:20:03,202 No. Oh come on, sure you are. 318 00:20:03,285 --> 00:20:05,121 Everybody loves breakfast. 319 00:20:05,204 --> 00:20:07,998 You've gotta have a good breakfast, start the day off right. 320 00:20:08,749 --> 00:20:09,790 Mmm. 321 00:20:12,795 --> 00:20:14,922 So, where are the other ones? 322 00:20:15,047 --> 00:20:16,048 Other ones what? 323 00:20:16,716 --> 00:20:18,359 The uhh, the other kids. 324 00:20:18,718 --> 00:20:20,302 They have names. 325 00:20:20,386 --> 00:20:21,971 Miles and Maizy. 326 00:20:23,597 --> 00:20:25,349 Are Miles and Maizy up yet? 327 00:20:25,433 --> 00:20:26,934 I woke them, thank you. 328 00:20:30,813 --> 00:20:33,065 There you go. Are you deaf? 329 00:20:33,149 --> 00:20:35,900 I said I wasn't hungry. That's one of my specialties. 330 00:20:40,823 --> 00:20:42,908 I'd rather starve, thank you. 331 00:20:42,992 --> 00:20:44,910 Does your mom know you drink coffee? 332 00:20:45,661 --> 00:20:47,997 I'm not doing it to impress you. 333 00:20:48,789 --> 00:20:50,458 I appreciate that. 334 00:20:52,543 --> 00:20:55,404 Is there any particular reason why you're giving me such a hard time? 335 00:20:57,006 --> 00:20:59,240 Am I giving you a hard time? 336 00:20:59,350 --> 00:21:02,150 Uhhh... well, I don't know. 337 00:21:03,387 --> 00:21:04,972 Hey! How ya doing? 338 00:21:05,055 --> 00:21:06,474 Who are you? 339 00:21:06,807 --> 00:21:08,392 I'm your Uncle Buck. 340 00:21:08,642 --> 00:21:10,686 Do I have an uncle? Unfortunately. 341 00:21:12,521 --> 00:21:14,050 Holy smokes. 342 00:21:14,482 --> 00:21:16,150 He's cooking our garbage. 343 00:21:22,823 --> 00:21:25,409 Hey, where's your uhhh, your sister and uhh... 344 00:21:25,493 --> 00:21:27,787 Her name is Maizy. Maizy. 345 00:21:27,870 --> 00:21:29,663 For the second time. 346 00:21:30,164 --> 00:21:31,332 Sorry. 347 00:21:33,709 --> 00:21:35,419 You must be hungry. 348 00:21:36,378 --> 00:21:37,838 Just for you. 349 00:21:38,839 --> 00:21:40,216 Oh my God. 350 00:21:41,342 --> 00:21:43,135 He put onions in the eggs. 351 00:21:43,219 --> 00:21:45,137 I'll gonna go check on Maizy. 352 00:21:45,429 --> 00:21:47,975 I'll fix you some cereal when I get back. 353 00:22:04,573 --> 00:22:06,909 Can I ask you something? What? 354 00:22:08,327 --> 00:22:09,829 Is your sister always this pleasant? 355 00:22:09,912 --> 00:22:12,915 No. She's usually in a bad mood in the morning. 356 00:22:15,751 --> 00:22:18,379 Ow! Do you want knots in your hair? 357 00:22:18,462 --> 00:22:20,172 Ow! Cut it out. 358 00:22:20,256 --> 00:22:21,715 I want Mom to do it. 359 00:22:21,799 --> 00:22:23,133 Mom's not here. 360 00:22:23,217 --> 00:22:24,885 She is too. No, she's not. 361 00:22:24,969 --> 00:22:26,720 She and Dad went to Indianapolis. 362 00:22:26,804 --> 00:22:28,389 They did not. 363 00:22:28,472 --> 00:22:30,975 Okay, they didn't. They did? 364 00:22:31,058 --> 00:22:33,811 Yes. I'm taking care of you. 365 00:22:33,936 --> 00:22:35,988 But you can't drive! 366 00:22:38,190 --> 00:22:39,775 Where do ya live? In the city. 367 00:22:39,859 --> 00:22:40,943 Do you have a house? Apartment. 368 00:22:41,026 --> 00:22:42,069 Own or rent? Rent. 369 00:22:42,152 --> 00:22:43,863 What do you do for a living? Lots of things. 370 00:22:43,946 --> 00:22:45,364 Where's your office? I don't have one. 371 00:22:45,447 --> 00:22:46,699 How come? I don't need one. 372 00:22:46,782 --> 00:22:48,075 Where's your wife? Don't have one. 373 00:22:48,158 --> 00:22:49,535 How come? It's a long story. 374 00:22:49,618 --> 00:22:50,953 Do you have kids? No I don't. 375 00:22:51,036 --> 00:22:52,663 How come? It's an even longer story. 376 00:22:52,746 --> 00:22:53,706 Are you my dad's brother? 377 00:22:53,789 --> 00:22:55,875 What's your record for consecutive questions asked? 378 00:22:55,958 --> 00:22:56,959 Thirty-eight. 379 00:22:57,042 --> 00:22:58,377 I'm your dad's brother all right. 380 00:22:58,460 --> 00:23:00,671 You have much more hair in your nose than my Dad. 381 00:23:00,754 --> 00:23:01,755 How nice of you to notice. 382 00:23:01,839 --> 00:23:02,965 I'm a kid, that's my job. 383 00:23:37,541 --> 00:23:39,960 That's my car. That isn't my car. 384 00:24:01,190 --> 00:24:02,816 Tying your shoe? 385 00:24:08,781 --> 00:24:11,075 What time do you want me to pick you up after school? 386 00:24:11,659 --> 00:24:13,452 Don't bother. I'll get a ride with friends. 387 00:24:13,535 --> 00:24:15,871 Oh no no. I've got my orders. What time? 388 00:24:16,580 --> 00:24:20,918 Are you really this stupid? I said I would get a ride. I always get a ride. 389 00:24:21,001 --> 00:24:24,221 Hey, I'll just call the school, find out what time, and I'll meet you right here. 390 00:24:24,672 --> 00:24:27,174 Go ahead, call the school. I won't be here. 391 00:24:27,800 --> 00:24:31,011 Stand me up today, and tomorrow, 392 00:24:31,095 --> 00:24:35,224 I'll drive you to school in my robe and pajamas and walk you to your first class. 393 00:24:36,350 --> 00:24:37,985 4:00 okay? 394 00:24:38,769 --> 00:24:41,175 I'm stunned that I'm related to you. 395 00:24:42,022 --> 00:24:44,966 You get the pole out of your keister, we'll get along just fine. 396 00:24:47,736 --> 00:24:50,900 Did you ever have anyone embarrass you like this? 397 00:24:59,665 --> 00:25:00,808 No. 398 00:25:18,475 --> 00:25:20,900 You think she hates me? With a passion. 399 00:25:20,936 --> 00:25:23,138 Really. You think it's the hat? 400 00:25:23,188 --> 00:25:24,700 No. No? 401 00:25:25,107 --> 00:25:26,567 A lot of people hate this hat. 402 00:25:26,650 --> 00:25:29,361 It angers a lot of people, just the sight of it. 403 00:25:29,945 --> 00:25:32,781 I'll tell you a story about that on the way to school. 404 00:25:37,661 --> 00:25:40,748 Uh-huh. Yeah right. Listen Buck. For eight years, 405 00:25:40,831 --> 00:25:43,584 you have been making plans, and breaking plans. 406 00:25:43,792 --> 00:25:45,711 What are you talking about hun? 407 00:25:45,794 --> 00:25:49,757 Didn't we talk last night? Did we talk last night huh, about this? 408 00:25:49,840 --> 00:25:53,200 What did we talk about? Me, playing the father. 409 00:25:53,802 --> 00:25:55,512 I'm really glad that you can do it for your brother. 410 00:25:55,596 --> 00:25:57,456 You sure as hell can't do it for me. 411 00:25:57,848 --> 00:25:59,016 How could I do it for you hun? 412 00:25:59,099 --> 00:26:01,977 We don't have kids. What are you talking about? 413 00:26:02,061 --> 00:26:05,856 Buck, I know, you think the job is pointless, 414 00:26:05,939 --> 00:26:07,900 and in some way I'm trying to manipulate you, 415 00:26:07,983 --> 00:26:09,985 and control you and ruin your life. 416 00:26:10,486 --> 00:26:12,600 No... Look. 417 00:26:12,800 --> 00:26:13,989 I have to fill the position. 418 00:26:14,073 --> 00:26:15,407 It's important to the company, 419 00:26:15,491 --> 00:26:17,076 it's important to me. I'm swamped down here. 420 00:26:17,159 --> 00:26:20,496 Now, unless you tell me different, I'm gonna offer the job to somebody else. 421 00:26:20,996 --> 00:26:23,290 Why don't you give me a week to think about it? 422 00:26:23,373 --> 00:26:25,834 You know, cause I don't know how long I'm gonna be here hun. 423 00:26:25,959 --> 00:26:30,714 And uhh, you know if, during that week you see somebody in there, that uhh 424 00:26:30,798 --> 00:26:34,176 that's gonna fill the bill, hire him, you know part-time basis or whatever. 425 00:26:34,802 --> 00:26:37,763 And that way uhh, you know, I'll make up my mind, and uhh 426 00:26:37,846 --> 00:26:39,731 and you know, we'll see where we are at that point. 427 00:26:40,057 --> 00:26:41,892 Okay. Well, I have to go now! 428 00:26:42,351 --> 00:26:44,019 Bye-bye hon. 429 00:26:55,364 --> 00:26:57,366 Eight. Eight more. Come on. 430 00:26:57,449 --> 00:26:59,952 Work it. Get the circulation going. 431 00:27:00,035 --> 00:27:01,745 Come on. Step it up. 432 00:27:02,621 --> 00:27:04,414 Isn't peace wonderful? 433 00:27:04,498 --> 00:27:09,461 Mikhail Gorbachev, the most improbable evil emperor in captivity, 434 00:27:09,795 --> 00:27:12,631 captivates Manhattan, wows the UN, 435 00:27:12,714 --> 00:27:16,176 by announcing a unilateral cut in the Soviet military, 436 00:27:16,718 --> 00:27:20,264 smiles and waves with erstwhile cold warriors 437 00:27:20,472 --> 00:27:22,057 Ronald Reagan... 438 00:27:33,819 --> 00:27:36,999 And the stock market has its best week, since July. 439 00:27:37,865 --> 00:27:39,375 Take that Karl Marx. 440 00:28:09,980 --> 00:28:12,900 Would you like to talk about a possible lunch trade? 441 00:29:01,823 --> 00:29:03,200 Cover your ears. 442 00:29:03,283 --> 00:29:04,493 What? Just do it. 443 00:29:11,124 --> 00:29:14,419 Do you know how whipped an engine has to be to blow that loud? 444 00:29:23,470 --> 00:29:24,680 Call me. 445 00:29:26,765 --> 00:29:28,290 You ever hear of a tune-up? 446 00:29:31,561 --> 00:29:33,880 You ever hear of a ritual killing? 447 00:29:36,441 --> 00:29:37,515 I don't get it. 448 00:29:37,567 --> 00:29:40,150 You gnaw on her face in public like that again, and you'll be one. 449 00:29:45,158 --> 00:29:46,368 Hey! 450 00:29:52,291 --> 00:29:54,126 Are you crazy? I can be. 451 00:29:54,209 --> 00:29:55,794 You could have taken his head off! 452 00:29:55,877 --> 00:29:57,462 Yeah, but would he notice? 453 00:29:57,546 --> 00:29:59,464 Can we get something straight? 454 00:29:59,548 --> 00:30:01,925 The guy's a predator, and you're his prey. 455 00:30:02,009 --> 00:30:03,969 Oh, really. You bet. 456 00:30:04,052 --> 00:30:05,053 And how do you know? 457 00:30:05,137 --> 00:30:08,056 When I was his age, I was the guy zooming the girls like you. 458 00:30:09,224 --> 00:30:11,476 Pretty face, big chip on your shoulder. 459 00:30:11,560 --> 00:30:14,021 I recommend that you stay out of my personal life. 460 00:30:15,522 --> 00:30:17,482 Do your parents stay out of your personal life? 461 00:30:17,566 --> 00:30:19,901 They don't know my personal life. 462 00:30:21,611 --> 00:30:23,138 Have they met twiddle dink? 463 00:30:24,323 --> 00:30:25,991 His name is Bug. 464 00:30:27,659 --> 00:30:29,161 First or last? 465 00:30:29,578 --> 00:30:32,247 First. What's his last name, spray? 466 00:30:35,917 --> 00:30:38,635 You should talk, Buck. 467 00:30:40,770 --> 00:30:45,420 ♪ Thunderbird (1953) ♪ by Ray Anthony 468 00:30:56,855 --> 00:30:59,300 No. No. N-O. 469 00:31:00,525 --> 00:31:02,152 Don't look at me like that. 470 00:31:03,320 --> 00:31:04,500 Don't. 471 00:31:05,572 --> 00:31:06,865 That's not fair. 472 00:31:12,913 --> 00:31:15,207 Don't you have a favorite doll or something? 473 00:31:16,833 --> 00:31:19,550 Why don't we get one of your dolls and put your dad's pajamas on him? 474 00:31:19,586 --> 00:31:20,629 No. 475 00:31:27,469 --> 00:31:30,000 Your brother! What about your brother? 476 00:31:31,223 --> 00:31:33,842 How about the dog? You know the dog. 477 00:31:39,564 --> 00:31:41,350 You can't. You just can't. 478 00:31:43,151 --> 00:31:47,275 It's a new law. That's it. It's in the books. 479 00:31:49,282 --> 00:31:51,175 You don't want to sleep with me. 480 00:31:52,369 --> 00:31:54,200 Can somebody get that please? 481 00:31:56,915 --> 00:31:59,200 Do I have to do everything around here? 482 00:32:04,506 --> 00:32:07,650 Yo. Hi, sweetie. How are you? 483 00:32:07,759 --> 00:32:12,100 Fine. I'm earning my keep. Uncle Buck's got me busting my hump. 484 00:32:12,222 --> 00:32:15,125 He says a little hard work will put some hair on my chest. 485 00:32:15,225 --> 00:32:16,550 At least I'm learning a trade. 486 00:32:16,643 --> 00:32:18,125 That's good. 487 00:32:18,895 --> 00:32:20,855 Grandpa's feeling a little bit better. 488 00:32:21,022 --> 00:32:23,900 And he sent you big hugs and kisses. 489 00:32:24,067 --> 00:32:25,477 Tell him to hang in there. 490 00:32:26,778 --> 00:32:28,321 Can you get Uncle Buck? 491 00:32:28,405 --> 00:32:29,731 Will do, chickie. 492 00:32:31,324 --> 00:32:32,367 Mom. 493 00:32:32,576 --> 00:32:33,702 Hi. 494 00:32:33,785 --> 00:32:37,238 Next time you take off, why don't you hire a murderer to watch the house? 495 00:32:38,123 --> 00:32:39,833 This guy's a joke. 496 00:32:39,916 --> 00:32:43,462 Well, why don't you just go your way and let him go his? 497 00:32:44,588 --> 00:32:46,915 While he systematically dismantles my life. 498 00:32:47,090 --> 00:32:50,093 Another drawback is I'm a big drooler. 499 00:32:50,302 --> 00:32:53,430 You could wake up in the middle of the night thinking you were asleep in a swamp. 500 00:32:53,555 --> 00:32:54,890 Mom's on the phone. 501 00:32:54,973 --> 00:32:56,766 Oh, good. I'll be right there. 502 00:32:56,850 --> 00:32:59,694 The guy took off today and left Miles and Maizy alone. 503 00:33:01,480 --> 00:33:04,265 Plus... He drinks. 504 00:33:04,691 --> 00:33:06,276 Did you uhh, brush your teeth? 505 00:33:06,359 --> 00:33:08,111 Yeah. You can feel my toothbrush. 506 00:33:08,195 --> 00:33:11,448 You know I have a friend who works at the crime lab at the police station. 507 00:33:11,948 --> 00:33:13,533 I could give him your toothbrush 508 00:33:13,617 --> 00:33:16,536 and he could run a test on it to see if you actually brushed your teeth 509 00:33:16,620 --> 00:33:19,581 or just ran your toothbrush under the faucet. 510 00:33:27,589 --> 00:33:31,510 If that's true, we're gonna really have to start brushing our teeth. 511 00:33:33,094 --> 00:33:34,429 Hi, how are you? 512 00:33:34,596 --> 00:33:36,264 I'm okay. How's everything? 513 00:33:36,389 --> 00:33:37,766 Good. Good. 514 00:33:38,225 --> 00:33:39,476 You sure? 515 00:33:39,601 --> 00:33:42,329 Everything is fine here. Everything is fine. 516 00:33:42,771 --> 00:33:43,897 Kids are okay? 517 00:33:43,980 --> 00:33:46,858 Oh kids are, kids are great! We're having a great time together. 518 00:33:46,942 --> 00:33:48,401 How's your dad? 519 00:33:48,527 --> 00:33:50,904 He's okay. He's okay. He's getting better. Thanks. 520 00:33:51,196 --> 00:33:53,365 Good. Well that's good news. That's encouraging. 521 00:33:53,448 --> 00:33:55,367 I've got a real good feeling about this. He's gonna be fine. 522 00:33:56,284 --> 00:33:57,869 I've got a few questions for you. 523 00:33:58,620 --> 00:34:01,400 You know, you got an interesting set of uhh, plates in the living room there. 524 00:34:01,456 --> 00:34:02,475 Are they old? 525 00:34:02,541 --> 00:34:04,626 Yeah. They are. 526 00:34:05,961 --> 00:34:08,046 Where, where would you find something like that? 527 00:34:08,129 --> 00:34:10,465 In an antique shop downtown or something? 528 00:34:12,592 --> 00:34:13,635 In England. 529 00:34:14,094 --> 00:34:15,303 Everything else seems... 530 00:34:21,184 --> 00:34:23,311 How many times a day do you feed a dog like that? 531 00:34:24,062 --> 00:34:28,332 How, how many times a day, do you think he eats? 532 00:34:28,483 --> 00:34:29,850 Four or five. 533 00:34:30,235 --> 00:34:32,987 I should have told you that, he eats once. He eats once a day. 534 00:34:33,280 --> 00:34:34,614 Just once. 535 00:34:36,074 --> 00:34:38,577 What does he like to drink? Uhh, water? 536 00:34:38,660 --> 00:34:40,662 Yes. Yes, he drinks water. 537 00:34:40,745 --> 00:34:42,247 I'd keep some water out. 538 00:34:42,330 --> 00:34:44,291 I've been leaving the toilet seats up. 539 00:34:45,250 --> 00:34:46,375 Yeah. 540 00:34:47,419 --> 00:34:49,296 Is that what the blue water is? It's not good for him huh. 541 00:34:49,588 --> 00:34:51,339 Oh. Oh, God. 542 00:34:51,631 --> 00:34:53,508 That, that might account for something. 543 00:34:54,009 --> 00:34:55,218 Nothing. 544 00:34:55,343 --> 00:34:59,514 Just uhh, an odd, coloration out on the grass. 545 00:35:00,473 --> 00:35:01,850 Buck, um... 546 00:35:03,977 --> 00:35:07,814 I-I just want you to know it makes me feel very secure to know that you're there. 547 00:35:11,443 --> 00:35:12,600 Thank you very much. 548 00:35:12,819 --> 00:35:14,195 Okay. Bye-bye. 549 00:35:21,453 --> 00:35:22,537 Bob! 550 00:35:23,371 --> 00:35:24,500 Bob! 551 00:35:25,850 --> 00:35:34,000 ♪ Mr. Sandman (1954) ♪ by The Chordettes 552 00:36:57,716 --> 00:36:59,050 Cindy. 553 00:37:09,018 --> 00:37:10,478 Come on. Open up. 554 00:37:12,856 --> 00:37:14,150 Hello? 555 00:37:22,532 --> 00:37:25,285 I'm getting mad. All right. 556 00:37:25,410 --> 00:37:27,412 Get ready, here I come. 557 00:37:27,495 --> 00:37:30,373 Come on. What do I have to talk dirty to you? 558 00:37:30,457 --> 00:37:31,833 Come on, open up for daddy. 559 00:37:32,000 --> 00:37:33,900 Shove a load up... 560 00:37:34,210 --> 00:37:36,504 There we go. Come on, nice and easy. 561 00:37:38,923 --> 00:37:40,425 Come on, there we go. Ah! Take that! 562 00:37:40,508 --> 00:37:42,635 Take that! Come on! You don't want the crowbar, do ya? 563 00:37:42,719 --> 00:37:43,720 Come on! 564 00:37:45,013 --> 00:37:46,431 Open up! 565 00:37:46,514 --> 00:37:47,640 Come on! 566 00:37:48,475 --> 00:37:50,560 I'm going to shove my load into you whether you like it or not. 567 00:37:50,643 --> 00:37:51,844 Come on! 568 00:37:52,645 --> 00:37:54,314 Come on, you son of a bitch. 569 00:37:54,773 --> 00:37:55,774 Open up. 570 00:37:58,818 --> 00:37:59,903 Okay. 571 00:38:15,710 --> 00:38:17,128 Freeze! What? 572 00:38:17,212 --> 00:38:18,797 Who are you? Cindy! 573 00:38:19,297 --> 00:38:20,507 She-she's in Indianapolis. 574 00:38:20,590 --> 00:38:22,417 What's she doing in Indianapolis? 575 00:38:22,801 --> 00:38:24,293 Her father had a heart attack. 576 00:38:24,511 --> 00:38:27,650 Who are you? And how do you know her father had a heart attack? 577 00:38:27,680 --> 00:38:29,140 I'm her brother-in-law. 578 00:38:29,224 --> 00:38:31,434 Oh yeah? Who ya talking dirty to? 579 00:38:34,479 --> 00:38:35,939 The washing machine. 580 00:38:36,397 --> 00:38:39,651 I... I don't know how to work it, so I was kicking it and swearing at it, 581 00:38:39,734 --> 00:38:42,362 you know, which is, not an uncommon thing to do. 582 00:38:43,029 --> 00:38:44,322 And you thought that... 583 00:38:44,405 --> 00:38:45,949 Oh, jeez... 584 00:38:46,032 --> 00:38:48,493 I apologize. Okay. 585 00:38:50,578 --> 00:38:52,447 Boy! That's funny. 586 00:38:54,666 --> 00:38:56,668 I live across the street. 587 00:38:57,001 --> 00:38:58,275 My name is Marcie. 588 00:38:58,503 --> 00:38:59,804 Buck Russell. 589 00:39:00,588 --> 00:39:02,148 Marcie Dahlgren-Frost. 590 00:39:02,423 --> 00:39:04,968 Dahlgren is my maiden name. Frost is my married name. 591 00:39:05,051 --> 00:39:08,054 I'm single again, but I never bothered to lose the Frost. 592 00:39:09,389 --> 00:39:11,400 And I get compliments on the hyphen. 593 00:39:11,432 --> 00:39:13,351 I'm sure you would. Sure you would. Yeah. 594 00:39:14,978 --> 00:39:17,605 Well, I came to invite Cindy to lunch. 595 00:39:17,689 --> 00:39:20,250 But since she's not here, do you have plans? 596 00:39:20,608 --> 00:39:24,048 Well actually, I-I got a lot of things to do around here, ya know. 597 00:39:24,078 --> 00:39:25,350 Rain check? 598 00:39:26,197 --> 00:39:28,300 I'm only going to be here a couple days. 599 00:39:28,575 --> 00:39:30,575 Cindy said it would only be a couple days? 600 00:39:30,618 --> 00:39:33,090 Well she didn't specify. I just assumed, you know. 601 00:39:33,162 --> 00:39:36,200 My father's heart attack, I was out of town for three weeks. 602 00:39:36,499 --> 00:39:38,267 No wonder Cindy didn't call me. 603 00:39:38,626 --> 00:39:41,525 You need a relative for an imposition of this size. 604 00:39:52,307 --> 00:39:53,750 Waiting for your sex? 605 00:39:54,350 --> 00:39:55,602 Shut up. 606 00:39:55,935 --> 00:39:56,978 Tia. 607 00:39:59,147 --> 00:40:00,231 Tia. 608 00:40:01,900 --> 00:40:04,986 What did you blow all that make-up for? We're just going bowling. 609 00:40:05,820 --> 00:40:07,155 I'm not going bowling. 610 00:40:07,238 --> 00:40:08,239 Come on, it's a great sport. 611 00:40:08,323 --> 00:40:10,999 And it's virtually impossible to get pregnant while doing it. 612 00:40:11,159 --> 00:40:12,160 If you catch my drift. 613 00:40:12,911 --> 00:40:14,650 You're disgusting. 614 00:40:15,330 --> 00:40:17,698 I'll die before I go anywhere with you. 615 00:40:18,041 --> 00:40:19,208 It's gonna be fun. 616 00:40:19,292 --> 00:40:20,600 They have rent-a-shoes. 617 00:40:21,044 --> 00:40:22,629 And rent-a-foot-disease. 618 00:40:22,921 --> 00:40:24,797 We've done the battle of the wills. 619 00:40:24,881 --> 00:40:26,799 The deck's stacked in my favor. 620 00:40:27,008 --> 00:40:28,700 You're just gonna lose again. 621 00:40:29,135 --> 00:40:30,345 Try me. 622 00:40:31,262 --> 00:40:33,031 How'd you like to spend the next several nights 623 00:40:33,060 --> 00:40:36,050 wondering if your crazy, out-of-work, bum uncle, 624 00:40:36,768 --> 00:40:39,250 will shave your head while you sleep? 625 00:40:39,729 --> 00:40:41,200 See you in the car. 626 00:40:50,250 --> 00:40:59,900 ♪ Juke Box Baby (1956) ♪ by Perry Como 627 00:41:13,012 --> 00:41:14,305 Yeah! 628 00:41:17,400 --> 00:41:18,600 Come on! 629 00:41:20,520 --> 00:41:21,980 There you go. 630 00:41:22,063 --> 00:41:23,898 Now, this is a bowling ball. 631 00:41:58,099 --> 00:42:01,099 How you doing? I've never seen you here before. 632 00:42:01,436 --> 00:42:02,937 I know about everybody. 633 00:42:03,271 --> 00:42:05,231 That's why they call me Pal. 634 00:42:06,774 --> 00:42:08,317 Buy you a beer? 635 00:42:09,277 --> 00:42:11,154 You must be a college student right? 636 00:42:12,405 --> 00:42:14,157 Cheerleader probably. 637 00:42:15,533 --> 00:42:16,999 You look firm. 638 00:42:17,785 --> 00:42:19,412 Come on. Give it a push. 639 00:42:20,872 --> 00:42:23,124 You like all-terrain vehicles? 640 00:42:24,292 --> 00:42:28,200 I got a brand-new Bronco right out in the parking lot. 641 00:42:28,600 --> 00:42:29,800 Red. 642 00:42:30,298 --> 00:42:31,799 Wanna go for a ride? 643 00:42:35,595 --> 00:42:37,388 Maizy, if the object of the game were 644 00:42:37,472 --> 00:42:40,650 to get the ball as close to the pins without knocking any of them over, 645 00:42:41,267 --> 00:42:43,686 you, would be champion of the world. 646 00:42:43,811 --> 00:42:45,313 Really? Really. 647 00:42:52,653 --> 00:42:55,900 My throat sort of hurts. I can't, I can't talk. 648 00:42:56,616 --> 00:42:58,616 I got a cure for that. 649 00:43:04,290 --> 00:43:05,300 Buck. 650 00:43:05,500 --> 00:43:08,020 You got a game going somewhere Pal? Yeah. 651 00:43:08,086 --> 00:43:10,296 Yeah well you're not gonna get any strikes sitting there are ya? 652 00:43:10,379 --> 00:43:11,931 Move it! Go on, get out! 653 00:43:15,384 --> 00:43:17,929 Hey, hey, shithead! Where the hell you been huh? 654 00:43:20,515 --> 00:43:22,266 Hey! Hey! Hey! 655 00:43:23,518 --> 00:43:25,720 Come on, sit down. I want you to meet my niece. 656 00:43:26,020 --> 00:43:27,980 Tia, this is Rog. Rog, Tia. 657 00:43:28,147 --> 00:43:31,775 Hi, how are ya? E. Roger Coswell. 658 00:43:32,250 --> 00:43:34,410 Come on. It ain't gonna bite. 659 00:43:36,920 --> 00:43:38,300 Okay.... 660 00:43:38,450 --> 00:43:40,450 Hey you've got to let somebody know where you are. 661 00:43:40,493 --> 00:43:42,537 I've been checking car trunks for your corpse. 662 00:43:42,620 --> 00:43:43,825 Yeah, I'm sorry about that. 663 00:43:43,871 --> 00:43:47,500 I've been out in the suburbs looking after my brother's kids for a few days, ya know. 664 00:43:47,917 --> 00:43:49,300 They're cuties. Boy I tell ya. 665 00:43:49,350 --> 00:43:52,046 Art Linkletter was right, kids do say the god damnedest things. 666 00:43:52,338 --> 00:43:53,923 Is Chanice here? 667 00:43:54,048 --> 00:43:56,759 Ahhumm, no. I'm kinda flying solo tonight. 668 00:43:56,843 --> 00:43:58,719 Yeah, I wanna let her have it for not marrying you. 669 00:43:58,803 --> 00:44:01,250 You know, if she caves in and married your worthless butt, 670 00:44:01,297 --> 00:44:02,807 I would be able to find ya. 671 00:44:02,890 --> 00:44:04,900 I gotta talk business, I can't find ya. 672 00:44:05,935 --> 00:44:08,896 Oh, why don't we uhh, why don't we step in my office then, huh? 673 00:44:08,980 --> 00:44:11,400 Excuse us, will ya. Come on big mouth. 674 00:44:11,732 --> 00:44:14,875 It was nice meeting ya. I'll remember it always. 675 00:44:19,073 --> 00:44:20,324 Cute kid. 676 00:44:20,783 --> 00:44:22,618 Jimmy Bean called. 677 00:44:23,411 --> 00:44:24,412 Oh yeah? 678 00:44:24,495 --> 00:44:27,748 He's coming in for the Winter Million at Burlington Park on Friday. 679 00:44:28,416 --> 00:44:31,275 He says it's a boat race. Very easy money. 680 00:44:31,300 --> 00:44:32,670 He owes you and he owes me. 681 00:44:32,753 --> 00:44:36,716 So he says we should show up an hour before post time and he'll give us the tip. 682 00:44:37,091 --> 00:44:41,100 Consider this Buck. With this score your whole year's covered. 683 00:44:42,513 --> 00:44:43,714 Huh? 684 00:44:46,267 --> 00:44:47,999 Maybe I can make it work. 685 00:44:48,936 --> 00:44:50,905 I'll see you Friday night. 686 00:44:51,439 --> 00:44:54,609 Thanks Rog. Watch the sterno, will ya? 687 00:45:00,114 --> 00:45:01,991 Hey, watch your fingers. 688 00:45:02,783 --> 00:45:03,900 Yay! 689 00:45:05,786 --> 00:45:07,100 What's a Chanice? 690 00:45:08,080 --> 00:45:10,770 That's someone who's uhh, sometimes seen around a Buck. 691 00:45:10,833 --> 00:45:12,543 Your girlfriend? 692 00:45:12,627 --> 00:45:15,630 A friend, and yes, she is a girl. 693 00:45:15,922 --> 00:45:17,965 Are you supposed to marry her or something? 694 00:45:18,049 --> 00:45:21,427 The subject has come up, yes, but uhh, nothing serious. 695 00:45:21,886 --> 00:45:24,955 Maybe if you got married you'd stop being such an asshole. 696 00:45:30,561 --> 00:45:31,900 Cigar? 697 00:45:32,188 --> 00:45:33,325 No thanks. 698 00:45:33,397 --> 00:45:35,358 Let me know if you change your mind. 699 00:45:35,441 --> 00:45:36,442 I will. 700 00:45:37,360 --> 00:45:39,195 I'll get it nice and juicy for ya. 701 00:45:48,788 --> 00:45:49,999 This is where... 702 00:45:50,206 --> 00:45:53,417 This is where you separate the men from the boys. 703 00:45:55,628 --> 00:45:59,257 Easy, easy. There you go. Yeah. 704 00:45:59,340 --> 00:46:01,008 I gotcha now. 705 00:46:12,853 --> 00:46:14,814 Happy birthday! 706 00:46:14,897 --> 00:46:15,898 Whoo! 707 00:46:17,692 --> 00:46:19,402 I hope you're hungry. 708 00:46:20,861 --> 00:46:23,700 You should see the toast! I couldn't even get it through the door. 709 00:46:31,831 --> 00:46:34,475 Ah, announcement here uhh... 710 00:46:34,709 --> 00:46:37,044 There's going to be a little delay on the uhh, clown. 711 00:46:37,128 --> 00:46:38,504 What clown? 712 00:46:38,713 --> 00:46:40,650 Miles' mom hired a clown. 713 00:46:56,772 --> 00:46:58,590 What's the matter, you don't like clowns? 714 00:46:58,691 --> 00:47:00,443 Yeah. About five years ago. 715 00:47:00,526 --> 00:47:03,029 Clowns are so boring they make me puke. 716 00:47:07,616 --> 00:47:09,535 Screw them, that's all they get. 717 00:47:11,704 --> 00:47:13,372 I'm Pooter, the clown. 718 00:47:13,581 --> 00:47:14,874 Put it there, will ya. 719 00:47:17,752 --> 00:47:19,086 The kids will love that. 720 00:47:19,170 --> 00:47:21,088 I didn't order you, my sister-in-law did. 721 00:47:21,172 --> 00:47:23,758 She's not here right now. I'm looking after them. I'm the uncle. 722 00:47:23,841 --> 00:47:24,967 Buck Russell's the name. 723 00:47:25,051 --> 00:47:27,345 Alright great. Listen, I'm sorry I'm uhh, late, uhh... 724 00:47:27,428 --> 00:47:30,681 I was at this all-night bachelorette party. 725 00:47:30,805 --> 00:47:34,101 Hey need any dildo jokes? Wham! I'm the guy! 726 00:47:38,898 --> 00:47:40,749 What, what did you have a few drinks this morning? 727 00:47:41,275 --> 00:47:43,486 Huh? I-I think ya did, didn't ya? 728 00:47:44,153 --> 00:47:45,696 Who are you, Mother Cabrini? 729 00:47:45,780 --> 00:47:47,323 You never touch the stuff? 730 00:47:47,448 --> 00:47:48,657 Ahh no, no, no, but I-I... 731 00:47:48,741 --> 00:47:51,577 I wouldn't be drinking if I was going to entertain some kids. 732 00:47:51,660 --> 00:47:53,971 I don't have to take any shit from you. 733 00:47:54,121 --> 00:47:55,539 You know who I am? 734 00:47:55,623 --> 00:48:00,419 In the field of local live home entertainment, I'm a God! 735 00:48:01,462 --> 00:48:03,999 Get in your mouse, and get outta here. 736 00:48:04,465 --> 00:48:06,850 Hey you, let me tell you something, 737 00:48:06,884 --> 00:48:11,514 you low-life, lying, four-flushing sack'a shit. 738 00:48:18,500 --> 00:48:26,500 ♪ Sport (1973) ♪ by Lightnin' Rod 739 00:48:34,829 --> 00:48:36,956 Let's go out to the car huh? 740 00:48:39,041 --> 00:48:40,251 Why? 741 00:48:42,211 --> 00:48:44,296 What do you mean why? 742 00:48:49,510 --> 00:48:50,761 Not now. 743 00:48:51,720 --> 00:48:52,847 It's fine. 744 00:48:55,182 --> 00:48:57,017 It's not fine. 745 00:48:57,726 --> 00:48:58,978 Why not? 746 00:49:00,813 --> 00:49:02,700 I just don't feel right yet. 747 00:49:04,608 --> 00:49:06,535 You ever gonna feel right? 748 00:49:12,491 --> 00:49:13,993 I don't get where we're going. 749 00:49:14,076 --> 00:49:17,079 I told ya 25 times. We're going to pick up Tia. 750 00:49:17,163 --> 00:49:20,460 She's at a cheerleader's house having dinner. Well, so she says. 751 00:49:21,041 --> 00:49:23,377 Since when do cheerleaders live in the woods? 752 00:49:24,820 --> 00:49:28,150 ♪ Small Time Hustler (1987) ♪ by The Dismasters 753 00:49:28,174 --> 00:49:30,217 Come on, I'll take you home now. 754 00:49:32,094 --> 00:49:34,054 I don't wanna go home. 755 00:49:38,267 --> 00:49:39,560 I'm okay. 756 00:49:40,227 --> 00:49:41,479 Sure? 757 00:49:45,858 --> 00:49:47,234 Trust me. 758 00:49:59,205 --> 00:50:00,581 Shit! Shit! 759 00:50:17,932 --> 00:50:19,558 Well, well, well. 760 00:50:19,975 --> 00:50:23,687 They certainly are scraping the bottom of the barrel for cheerleaders these days. 761 00:50:24,980 --> 00:50:27,182 What are you doing here? 762 00:50:27,483 --> 00:50:29,610 We were just driving by, going out for some ice cream. 763 00:50:29,693 --> 00:50:31,195 Thought you might like to join us. 764 00:50:31,904 --> 00:50:35,199 I said I would be home at 10:00. It's not even 9:00. 765 00:50:38,577 --> 00:50:42,081 Who said anything about that? I just thought you'd like to join us for some ice cream. 766 00:50:42,915 --> 00:50:44,792 Maybe your Bug here can join us. 767 00:50:44,959 --> 00:50:47,002 We can talk about burying the hatchet. 768 00:50:47,086 --> 00:50:49,100 You know what a hatchet is, don't ya Bug? 769 00:50:49,255 --> 00:50:50,631 It's an ax? 770 00:50:50,798 --> 00:50:52,550 Sort of. Yeah, yeah. 771 00:50:53,133 --> 00:50:55,010 I got one in the car if you'd like to see it. 772 00:50:56,887 --> 00:50:57,972 I'll pass. 773 00:50:58,097 --> 00:51:00,933 Fair enough. I like to carry it, you know. 774 00:51:01,141 --> 00:51:03,060 You never know when you're gonna need it. 775 00:51:04,061 --> 00:51:07,022 Uhh, you know a situation may come up, say uhh, 776 00:51:07,106 --> 00:51:11,900 for example, someone's been drinking and about to drive a loved one home, 777 00:51:12,736 --> 00:51:14,400 then I like to know I have it. 778 00:51:14,697 --> 00:51:17,783 Not to kill. No... Just to maim. 779 00:51:18,742 --> 00:51:21,328 Take a little off the shoulder. Woosh! 780 00:51:22,162 --> 00:51:23,550 The elbow. 781 00:51:23,664 --> 00:51:26,500 Shave a little meat off the old kneecap. 782 00:51:26,709 --> 00:51:27,910 Whoo. 783 00:51:28,168 --> 00:51:29,670 You got both kneecaps? 784 00:51:30,421 --> 00:51:32,923 I like to keep mine razor-sharp too. 785 00:51:33,132 --> 00:51:35,217 Sharp enough you can shave with them. 786 00:51:35,301 --> 00:51:37,845 Why, I've been known to circumcise a gnat. 787 00:51:39,346 --> 00:51:41,473 You're not a gnat, are ya Bug? 788 00:51:41,557 --> 00:51:45,102 Wait a minute... Bug, gnat. 789 00:51:47,021 --> 00:51:49,500 Is there a little similarity there? 790 00:51:51,150 --> 00:51:53,950 Whoa! I think there is. 791 00:51:56,196 --> 00:51:58,782 You understand what I'm talking about? 792 00:51:59,867 --> 00:52:01,660 I don't think you do. 793 00:52:01,744 --> 00:52:03,495 I'll be right back. 794 00:52:11,795 --> 00:52:15,174 I'm sorry. Look, um, I think you'd better split. 795 00:52:15,257 --> 00:52:17,926 You know, I don't exactly want him going berserk with an ax on me. 796 00:52:18,886 --> 00:52:20,179 He's all talk. 797 00:52:20,262 --> 00:52:21,639 Here it is. 798 00:52:22,723 --> 00:52:25,951 Come on over. Come on, I wanna show it to ya. 799 00:52:27,895 --> 00:52:29,513 Maybe later. 800 00:52:30,064 --> 00:52:31,248 Okay. 801 00:52:37,780 --> 00:52:40,240 He's gone in a few days. 802 00:52:40,741 --> 00:52:41,950 Just relax. 803 00:52:43,369 --> 00:52:45,179 I'll get him back. 804 00:53:00,469 --> 00:53:03,180 That's a pretty stupid thing to do during flu season. 805 00:53:03,263 --> 00:53:05,350 I bet she's getting the tongue. 806 00:53:34,550 --> 00:53:42,000 ♪ Wild Thing (1988) ♪ by Tone Loc 807 00:54:08,620 --> 00:54:09,663 Just looking. 808 00:55:29,150 --> 00:55:30,450 Next. 809 00:55:32,621 --> 00:55:34,350 Tell ya what. Let me go in there first, okay? 810 00:55:34,414 --> 00:55:37,851 I'll cover for ya. Give you a little more time out here to relax. 811 00:55:37,960 --> 00:55:39,400 Okay. All right? Mmm hmm. 812 00:55:47,427 --> 00:55:48,804 Good morning. 813 00:55:56,436 --> 00:55:58,288 I'm Anita Hoargarth. 814 00:55:58,897 --> 00:56:01,984 Buck Melanoma, Moley Russell's wart. 815 00:56:05,445 --> 00:56:09,449 Not her wart, not her wart. I'm, I'm the wart. 816 00:56:09,700 --> 00:56:13,787 She's my tumor, my, my growth, my uhh, my pimple. 817 00:56:13,871 --> 00:56:15,205 I'm "Uncle Wart." 818 00:56:15,289 --> 00:56:18,083 Just old Buck "Wart" Russell, that's what they call me. 819 00:56:18,166 --> 00:56:20,999 Or uhh, melanoma head. They'll call me that. 820 00:56:21,795 --> 00:56:23,797 "Melanoma head's" coming. 821 00:56:24,548 --> 00:56:27,217 I'm... Uncle, Maizy Russell's uncle. 822 00:56:27,301 --> 00:56:28,844 I'm her uncle. 823 00:56:29,636 --> 00:56:32,514 Her uhh, her mother uhh, set up this conference with you. 824 00:56:33,307 --> 00:56:35,392 I'm assistant principal here, 825 00:56:35,475 --> 00:56:38,854 as you've probably noticed from the indications on the door. 826 00:56:42,816 --> 00:56:44,026 This door? 827 00:56:44,109 --> 00:56:46,377 The outer door. The outer door. Yes. 828 00:56:46,403 --> 00:56:48,238 Cause there's nothing on this one. 829 00:56:48,322 --> 00:56:50,240 That's just about enough of that. 830 00:56:52,326 --> 00:56:53,493 Sorry. 831 00:56:54,661 --> 00:56:59,750 I've been an educator for 31.3 years, 832 00:56:59,833 --> 00:57:03,675 and in that time, I've seen a lot of bad eggs. 833 00:57:03,754 --> 00:57:07,174 I say "eggs" because, at the elementary level, 834 00:57:07,257 --> 00:57:10,650 we are not dealing with fully developed individuals. 835 00:57:14,014 --> 00:57:18,243 I see a bad egg, when I look at your niece. 836 00:57:19,603 --> 00:57:24,066 She is a twiddler, a dreamer, a silly heart. 837 00:57:24,483 --> 00:57:26,401 She is a jabberbox. 838 00:57:26,693 --> 00:57:28,275 And frankly... 839 00:57:28,362 --> 00:57:35,400 I don't think she takes a thing in her life or her career as a student seriously. 840 00:57:38,455 --> 00:57:41,670 She's only six. That is not a valid excuse! 841 00:57:41,750 --> 00:57:44,552 I hear that every day and I dismiss it. 842 00:57:45,170 --> 00:57:48,882 I don't think I want to know a six-year-old who isn't a dreamer, or a silly heart. 843 00:57:48,966 --> 00:57:52,700 And I sure don't want to know one who takes their student career seriously. 844 00:57:53,303 --> 00:57:55,555 I don't have a college degree. 845 00:57:56,056 --> 00:57:57,557 I don't even have a job. 846 00:57:58,517 --> 00:58:02,688 Does anyone have a special story to tell the class about something that happened this week? 847 00:58:03,897 --> 00:58:04,898 Maizy. 848 00:58:05,065 --> 00:58:07,160 My uncle was microwaving my socks, 849 00:58:07,192 --> 00:58:09,903 and the dog threw up on the couch for about an hour. 850 00:58:10,362 --> 00:58:11,905 Honest? Yes. 851 00:58:12,239 --> 00:58:14,241 Why was your uncle microwaving your socks? 852 00:58:14,408 --> 00:58:16,900 He can't get the goddamn washing machine to work. 853 00:58:17,119 --> 00:58:18,895 Blasphemer! 854 00:58:19,413 --> 00:58:21,540 But I know a good kid when I see one. 855 00:58:21,623 --> 00:58:23,417 Because they're all good kids, 856 00:58:23,500 --> 00:58:26,795 until dried-out, brain-dead skags like you 857 00:58:26,878 --> 00:58:29,047 drag them down and convince them they're no good. 858 00:58:29,965 --> 00:58:32,968 You so much as scowl at my niece or any other kid in this school 859 00:58:33,051 --> 00:58:35,804 and I hear about it, I'm coming looking for you. 860 00:58:38,932 --> 00:58:40,600 Take this quarter. 861 00:58:41,351 --> 00:58:45,022 Go downtown, and have a rat gnaw that thing off your face. 862 00:58:46,857 --> 00:58:48,533 Good day to you madam. 863 00:58:56,074 --> 00:58:57,117 Next. 864 00:58:57,868 --> 00:58:59,244 Ah, yeah! 865 00:59:19,806 --> 00:59:22,476 Hi Chanice. This is Terry. 866 00:59:23,268 --> 00:59:24,895 Uhh, Walt Bern... 867 00:59:25,395 --> 00:59:29,357 Jesus, would you get with the program? Bernstein is his name. 868 00:59:29,441 --> 00:59:31,151 I forgot to give you the message. 869 00:59:31,359 --> 00:59:34,988 At least somebody knows what they're doing down there. 870 00:59:35,572 --> 00:59:37,200 Chanice? Buck. 871 00:59:39,159 --> 00:59:41,399 I hate these machines. umm. 872 00:59:41,620 --> 00:59:44,931 Look, I'm just calling to say I uhh, I miss ya. 873 00:59:46,333 --> 00:59:49,211 I know you probably don't believe it, but it's-it's true. 874 00:59:49,294 --> 00:59:50,837 No, I haven't been drinking. 875 00:59:51,338 --> 00:59:52,700 I've been thinking a lot about you 876 00:59:52,756 --> 00:59:55,342 and what we've talked about the past few weeks. Umm... 877 00:59:55,425 --> 00:59:57,427 I think about you all the time. 878 00:59:57,511 --> 01:00:00,850 I think about those two dimples on your buns. 879 01:00:01,098 --> 01:00:02,390 Dimples. 880 01:00:02,849 --> 01:00:04,601 What did we call them? One was... 881 01:00:04,684 --> 01:00:08,855 The one on the right was Lyndon, and the left was, Johnson I think. 882 01:00:08,939 --> 01:00:10,774 No, that was your boobs we did. 883 01:00:10,857 --> 01:00:14,150 No, your boobs were Minnie and Mickey. I remember that because of Disney World. 884 01:00:14,945 --> 01:00:16,279 And Felix. Felix is what we called your... 885 01:00:18,532 --> 01:00:20,700 God damn kids. 886 01:00:21,034 --> 01:00:22,452 Okay come on, you. 887 01:00:22,536 --> 01:00:23,620 Come on, get in the house. 888 01:00:23,703 --> 01:00:25,872 What are you doing out here making all this noise? 889 01:00:26,623 --> 01:00:27,833 Get in the house where you belong. 890 01:00:27,916 --> 01:00:29,600 Come on! Come on! 891 01:00:30,293 --> 01:00:31,378 Hey! 892 01:00:32,003 --> 01:00:33,672 Who let the cat out? 893 01:00:33,755 --> 01:00:35,549 We don't have a cat. 894 01:00:36,174 --> 01:00:37,926 Come on! Get out! 895 01:00:38,093 --> 01:00:40,250 Go on! Shoo! Shoo! Shoo! Shoo! Shoo! 896 01:00:46,351 --> 01:00:47,394 Hey! 897 01:00:49,855 --> 01:00:51,064 Open up! 898 01:00:51,606 --> 01:00:52,774 Miles? 899 01:00:59,614 --> 01:01:00,615 Hello. 900 01:01:00,699 --> 01:01:02,712 Hi. May I please speak to Buck Russell? 901 01:01:02,742 --> 01:01:05,036 This is a friend of his, Chanice Kobolowski. 902 01:01:07,497 --> 01:01:11,400 I'm sorry, Chanice. He's not here right now. 903 01:01:13,253 --> 01:01:15,213 Well, can you tell me when he's gonna be back? 904 01:01:15,297 --> 01:01:18,925 He went out with Marcie, the lady who lives across the street. 905 01:01:19,634 --> 01:01:21,700 They usually stay out pretty late. 906 01:01:26,558 --> 01:01:28,100 Do you wanna leave a message? 907 01:01:33,000 --> 01:01:34,200 Ummm... 908 01:01:34,900 --> 01:01:36,500 No. There's no message. 909 01:01:55,837 --> 01:01:57,589 There's no message. 910 01:01:58,297 --> 01:02:03,297 ♪ Java (cover) (1964) ♪ by Al Hirt 911 01:02:23,000 --> 01:02:24,241 Ohh, hot! 912 01:02:38,296 --> 01:02:41,091 Is there a big, sexy guy in here? 913 01:02:41,883 --> 01:02:43,525 Oh, please don't let it be true. 914 01:02:45,136 --> 01:02:45,700 Hi. 915 01:02:45,900 --> 01:02:49,307 Oh, my God! What are you doing? 916 01:02:49,683 --> 01:02:51,601 The uhh, laundry. What's it look like? 917 01:02:52,102 --> 01:02:55,480 The washing machine's still broken, so I thought I'd use the uhh, microwave. 918 01:02:55,814 --> 01:02:58,200 Nuke them up, ya know. Heats them up pretty good too. 919 01:02:58,858 --> 01:03:01,194 You know, it kills the germs and odors that they cause. 920 01:03:01,278 --> 01:03:02,988 You don't know what you're doing. 921 01:03:03,071 --> 01:03:06,900 You're bored out of your mind. You need a little adult supervision. 922 01:03:07,993 --> 01:03:09,100 Excuse me? 923 01:03:22,750 --> 01:03:24,250 ♪ Laugh, Laugh (1965) ♪ by The Beau Brummels 924 01:03:24,259 --> 01:03:26,217 Come on. Come on. I don't wanna dance. 925 01:03:26,247 --> 01:03:27,600 Come on! 926 01:03:27,804 --> 01:03:31,016 What, I don't feel like dance... I'm not a dancer. Come on. This is ridiculous. 927 01:03:31,099 --> 01:03:33,101 I'm not gonna leave unless you do. 928 01:03:33,852 --> 01:03:35,770 Okay, I'll dance. One dance, though. That's it. 929 01:03:35,854 --> 01:03:38,648 Cause I really have to take a nap and uhh... 930 01:03:38,732 --> 01:03:41,276 All right, one dance. That's it. 931 01:03:47,115 --> 01:03:48,241 Whoa! 932 01:03:51,244 --> 01:03:52,700 What's this? 933 01:03:54,456 --> 01:03:58,025 Ah come on, the dog is watching. Come on. 934 01:03:58,460 --> 01:04:00,690 What is that, dirty dancing? Uh-huh. 935 01:04:01,845 --> 01:04:03,506 Isn't that where you got the girl by the neck. 936 01:04:03,590 --> 01:04:05,008 Whoa, dipped her. Whoa. 937 01:04:05,800 --> 01:04:06,843 Remember that? 938 01:04:07,010 --> 01:04:08,000 Dips. 939 01:04:08,640 --> 01:04:09,630 Dips. 940 01:04:18,605 --> 01:04:21,316 Am I bleeding? Uhh... no. 941 01:04:22,275 --> 01:04:24,402 Will you get off? My back! 942 01:04:30,617 --> 01:04:31,815 Hello. 943 01:04:35,789 --> 01:04:38,291 Oh stop it. I mean it! 944 01:04:41,336 --> 01:04:43,213 This is fun though, isn't it? 945 01:04:43,296 --> 01:04:44,631 I guess. 946 01:04:45,590 --> 01:04:47,634 My aerobic workout today. 947 01:04:47,926 --> 01:04:50,178 Heart's beating like a rabbit here. 948 01:04:52,514 --> 01:04:53,515 Oh. 949 01:05:12,617 --> 01:05:13,993 Hi Chanice! 950 01:05:14,828 --> 01:05:16,079 Surprise! 951 01:05:18,456 --> 01:05:20,875 This is um... Marcie. 952 01:05:24,170 --> 01:05:27,650 Yeah Marcie, and uhh, she lives across the road. 953 01:05:27,924 --> 01:05:29,175 And she came over to uhh... 954 01:05:29,259 --> 01:05:30,760 Shut up Buck. 955 01:05:31,010 --> 01:05:32,637 OK that's a good idea. 956 01:05:34,806 --> 01:05:36,999 Is this who you were out with last night? 957 01:05:40,353 --> 01:05:41,438 What? 958 01:05:42,021 --> 01:05:43,700 I didn't go out last night. 959 01:05:45,233 --> 01:05:48,415 Hey, look. Honest, honest, honest. I'm telling you the truth. 960 01:05:48,445 --> 01:05:49,863 You son of a bitch! 961 01:05:49,946 --> 01:05:54,075 Don't say that okay. Chanice, don't walk away like... Chanice! 962 01:05:54,701 --> 01:05:57,036 Chanice! Hey, come here! 963 01:05:57,120 --> 01:05:59,100 Chanice! Come here hun. 964 01:06:02,250 --> 01:06:04,085 Chanice wait a minute! Wait a minute! Let me explain to you! 965 01:06:04,169 --> 01:06:05,170 Will you let me explain? 966 01:06:07,464 --> 01:06:09,090 You're wrecking the driveway! 967 01:06:10,258 --> 01:06:11,634 Chanice! 968 01:06:12,051 --> 01:06:13,261 Come on! 969 01:06:14,971 --> 01:06:16,375 I love you! 970 01:06:33,615 --> 01:06:35,492 Well what flew up her nose? 971 01:06:42,332 --> 01:06:45,668 You better uhh, go home okay Marcie? 972 01:06:46,252 --> 01:06:48,505 Pick up your records. The party's over. 973 01:06:49,464 --> 01:06:50,590 Okay? 974 01:06:58,765 --> 01:07:02,477 So, I'll just go home and wait for the Federal Express man. 975 01:07:11,945 --> 01:07:13,821 Good night Uncle Buck. 976 01:07:14,864 --> 01:07:16,282 Good night sweetheart. 977 01:07:17,742 --> 01:07:19,118 Good night. 978 01:07:26,668 --> 01:07:28,200 Uncle Buck? Yeah? 979 01:07:29,212 --> 01:07:30,588 Got a minute? 980 01:07:30,672 --> 01:07:31,756 I got lots of minutes. 981 01:07:33,132 --> 01:07:35,552 Now that everything's okay with my grandfather, 982 01:07:35,635 --> 01:07:36,975 I wanna go out tomorrow night. 983 01:07:37,095 --> 01:07:40,348 You can go crazy after I leave. Until then I'm not letting you out. 984 01:07:47,146 --> 01:07:50,191 You just can't find any way to be cool, can you? 985 01:07:50,316 --> 01:07:51,609 You mean easy? No. 986 01:07:51,693 --> 01:07:54,070 I mean decent. You mean blind. 987 01:07:54,529 --> 01:07:57,982 Who are you trying to score points with, my parents? 988 01:07:58,491 --> 01:08:00,860 How many times have they had you here since we moved? 989 01:08:01,369 --> 01:08:03,871 Try none until they went up shit creek and got stuck. 990 01:08:04,330 --> 01:08:06,666 Get used on your parents' time. 991 01:08:07,750 --> 01:08:10,128 Hey Buck! Yeah. 992 01:08:11,504 --> 01:08:13,172 Have a bad day today? 993 01:08:16,134 --> 01:08:19,700 It hurts when someone screws with your life, doesn't it? 994 01:08:38,031 --> 01:08:39,365 Last call. 995 01:08:43,870 --> 01:08:45,705 There you go. There you go. 996 01:08:48,916 --> 01:08:50,752 A little for you, a little for me. 997 01:08:56,633 --> 01:08:57,950 Boy... 998 01:09:01,035 --> 01:09:02,191 People used to say to me, 999 01:09:02,221 --> 01:09:05,558 "Boy Buck, you are one lucky son of a bitch." 1000 01:09:07,727 --> 01:09:10,438 "You got it made Buck. You got it made." 1001 01:09:10,521 --> 01:09:11,800 And I did. 1002 01:09:12,357 --> 01:09:14,651 They'd say, "Oh man Buck, look at you." 1003 01:09:14,734 --> 01:09:17,028 "You don't have any kids, you don't have any wife." 1004 01:09:17,111 --> 01:09:20,531 "You don't have a desk, you don't have an office." 1005 01:09:20,615 --> 01:09:23,826 "You don't have, you don't have a boss to worry about." 1006 01:09:27,205 --> 01:09:28,790 They were right. 1007 01:09:29,165 --> 01:09:30,667 I had it made. 1008 01:09:36,130 --> 01:09:42,100 Only thing now is Perce, nobody says that anymore. 1009 01:09:47,600 --> 01:09:49,143 Oh boy. 1010 01:09:49,977 --> 01:09:51,145 But... 1011 01:09:52,188 --> 01:09:54,200 It'll all be better tomorrow. 1012 01:09:56,776 --> 01:09:58,111 Always is. 1013 01:10:01,030 --> 01:10:04,784 Because tomorrow, we go to the track, 1014 01:10:05,034 --> 01:10:08,871 win some dough, some serious dough. 1015 01:10:10,248 --> 01:10:11,425 Yeah. 1016 01:10:12,875 --> 01:10:14,999 Make a lot of money tomorrow kiddo. 1017 01:10:16,170 --> 01:10:18,131 You want a little pretzel with your beer? 1018 01:10:24,303 --> 01:10:26,514 U.B. went to school to pick you up you know. 1019 01:10:26,597 --> 01:10:29,559 Tell U.B. when he gets home that he lost, okay? 1020 01:10:29,642 --> 01:10:30,977 Lost what? 1021 01:10:31,394 --> 01:10:33,396 Just tell him. He'll know what it means. 1022 01:10:33,813 --> 01:10:35,314 I'll see you guys Sunday. 1023 01:10:35,398 --> 01:10:37,984 What day is today? Friday. 1024 01:10:38,192 --> 01:10:40,737 You know what that means. Jumbo party. 1025 01:10:40,945 --> 01:10:43,656 You can put that on a platter and serve it up hot. 1026 01:11:44,675 --> 01:11:46,010 U.B.'s home. 1027 01:11:46,093 --> 01:11:48,054 Tia! Tia! 1028 01:11:49,138 --> 01:11:51,724 You guys seen Tia? She took a breeze U.B. 1029 01:11:55,728 --> 01:11:59,065 And she promised me she was gonna look after you guys this evening. 1030 01:11:59,148 --> 01:12:00,300 She promised me. 1031 01:12:01,067 --> 01:12:02,527 So much for promises. 1032 01:12:02,735 --> 01:12:05,196 Does anyone in this house know how to keep a promise? 1033 01:12:05,488 --> 01:12:07,907 Well I know you two guys do. I know. 1034 01:12:08,074 --> 01:12:10,910 You know, I had somewhere very important to go to tonight. 1035 01:12:11,494 --> 01:12:13,246 This is how I make my living. 1036 01:12:13,329 --> 01:12:15,164 This is, this was, very important to me. 1037 01:12:15,248 --> 01:12:17,375 This was... My whole year was based on tonight. 1038 01:12:18,084 --> 01:12:20,750 It may be peanuts to your dad but it's my living. 1039 01:12:21,587 --> 01:12:24,674 I have no choice, I don't care what your parents are gonna say. 1040 01:12:24,757 --> 01:12:26,750 I-I-I have to take you with me tonight. 1041 01:12:27,051 --> 01:12:28,219 Where? 1042 01:12:28,469 --> 01:12:30,012 To a racetrack. 1043 01:12:33,099 --> 01:12:34,350 Here we go. 1044 01:12:34,433 --> 01:12:35,726 You have to go to the bathroom? 1045 01:12:35,810 --> 01:12:37,125 Nope. You sure? 1046 01:12:37,228 --> 01:12:38,187 Yep. 1047 01:12:38,271 --> 01:12:40,189 This is going to be fun you know, uhh. 1048 01:12:40,273 --> 01:12:42,400 Beautiful horses, interesting people. 1049 01:12:42,984 --> 01:12:44,944 And win some serious coin right? 1050 01:12:45,069 --> 01:12:48,100 Well, sometimes yeah, but that's not the real reason people go there. 1051 01:12:48,447 --> 01:12:54,950 People go because of the uhh, beautiful horses and the uhh, and the colorful jockeys and uhh... 1052 01:12:56,038 --> 01:12:58,332 Bug picked up Tia? Mmm-hmm. 1053 01:12:58,708 --> 01:13:00,900 And she said she was going, to a party? 1054 01:13:01,210 --> 01:13:04,422 She said she'd be back Sunday. Must be a slumber party. 1055 01:13:07,008 --> 01:13:09,468 Alright hop in the back there. Get your belts on. 1056 01:13:10,636 --> 01:13:13,200 Go to a party all weekend, let her go to a party all weekend! 1057 01:13:13,723 --> 01:13:15,266 She's old enough to know better. 1058 01:13:15,641 --> 01:13:17,810 Hell, she doesn't listen to anybody anyway. 1059 01:13:18,853 --> 01:13:20,187 Damn kids. 1060 01:14:03,940 --> 01:14:05,600 Yeah. Kobolowski Tires. 1061 01:14:06,359 --> 01:14:07,777 Hi, it's me. 1062 01:14:08,819 --> 01:14:10,655 Buck, can't you ever take a hint? 1063 01:14:10,863 --> 01:14:14,500 Chanice, it's not about me. I got a problem at the house. 1064 01:14:14,659 --> 01:14:16,452 I need somebody to watch the kids. 1065 01:14:16,702 --> 01:14:18,454 No. I'll tell you what you need. 1066 01:14:18,537 --> 01:14:21,457 Your horse fixer's in town, and you need to get to the track. 1067 01:14:21,540 --> 01:14:23,800 I ran into Rog. See, he told me all about it. 1068 01:14:24,085 --> 01:14:26,587 The idiot had the nerve to ask me for a loan. 1069 01:14:27,004 --> 01:14:27,964 What's the matter? 1070 01:14:28,047 --> 01:14:30,750 You can't take children with you when you're gonna cheat on a horserace? 1071 01:14:30,771 --> 01:14:32,718 Ahh, you got some religion out there in the 'burbs? 1072 01:14:32,885 --> 01:14:35,429 I came close. I, I had them in the car. 1073 01:14:36,263 --> 01:14:38,849 Can we put our personal problems aside for a second? 1074 01:14:39,558 --> 01:14:41,227 Tia took off on me. 1075 01:14:41,310 --> 01:14:43,562 I was supposed to pick her up after school. She wasn't there. 1076 01:14:43,646 --> 01:14:44,900 What do you mean, she ran away? 1077 01:14:45,340 --> 01:14:47,875 I don... I guess, I don't know. I... 1078 01:14:48,401 --> 01:14:52,071 She's 15, she's angry, she's confused. 1079 01:14:53,072 --> 01:14:54,991 And I need to find her. 1080 01:14:56,242 --> 01:14:57,827 Can you help me? 1081 01:14:58,911 --> 01:15:00,913 I'm really stuck Chanice. 1082 01:15:04,917 --> 01:15:06,400 All right. All right. 1083 01:15:06,919 --> 01:15:09,380 I will help you because there's kids involved in this. 1084 01:15:09,463 --> 01:15:12,967 But as far as you and I are concerned, it is over. 1085 01:15:14,635 --> 01:15:16,200 However it has to be. 1086 01:15:18,180 --> 01:15:20,150 I'll be there. Thank you. 1087 01:15:20,766 --> 01:15:22,500 For what it's worth, I'm sorry. 1088 01:15:44,582 --> 01:15:46,375 Your car's on fire. Your car's on fire. 1089 01:15:46,459 --> 01:15:48,627 No, no, no. It's just a little oil. 1090 01:15:48,711 --> 01:15:51,547 I'm looking for a party somewhere around here. 1091 01:15:51,630 --> 01:15:53,424 Oh, that's on Totowa Lane. 1092 01:15:53,507 --> 01:15:56,385 My niece is there. Uhh, our son is there. 1093 01:15:56,469 --> 01:15:57,928 Uhh, kids. 1094 01:15:58,012 --> 01:16:00,806 I don't think you oughtta go in there with that hat on. They'll kill ya. 1095 01:16:00,890 --> 01:16:03,167 Really? Yeah. Thanks for the tip. 1096 01:16:49,313 --> 01:16:53,025 I'm, I'm supposed to come over and watch you. 1097 01:16:56,445 --> 01:16:57,488 Hi! 1098 01:16:58,239 --> 01:17:00,699 I'm Chanice Kobolowski. I'm Uncle Buck's friend. 1099 01:17:00,783 --> 01:17:02,693 May I see your driver's license ma'am? 1100 01:17:03,869 --> 01:17:04,995 Yeah. 1101 01:17:05,663 --> 01:17:06,747 Sure. 1102 01:17:06,914 --> 01:17:08,249 Good idea. 1103 01:17:10,709 --> 01:17:12,211 Hold on a minute, I got it! 1104 01:17:12,795 --> 01:17:14,630 See? Look. 1105 01:17:15,214 --> 01:17:16,340 Look! 1106 01:17:16,507 --> 01:17:18,217 Can you please take it out of there? 1107 01:17:18,551 --> 01:17:19,718 Take it out?! 1108 01:17:30,150 --> 01:17:37,000 ♪ Bust A Move (1989) ♪ by Young MC 1109 01:17:43,033 --> 01:17:44,285 You okay? 1110 01:17:45,327 --> 01:17:47,163 Come on, what's the matter? 1111 01:18:12,563 --> 01:18:14,700 Coming through here. How ya doing? 1112 01:18:16,275 --> 01:18:17,750 Excuse me. Having a good time? 1113 01:18:17,610 --> 01:18:19,570 You seen a guy named Bug around here? 1114 01:18:21,447 --> 01:18:23,199 I'm Tia Russell's uncle. 1115 01:18:23,282 --> 01:18:26,368 You girls know Tia? No? She's kind of new. 1116 01:18:26,452 --> 01:18:27,912 I'm her uncle. 1117 01:18:29,205 --> 01:18:31,457 You haven't seen that Bug around here, have you? 1118 01:18:31,749 --> 01:18:33,292 No. No. 1119 01:18:33,667 --> 01:18:34,960 Nice guy. 1120 01:18:35,044 --> 01:18:37,338 Hey! Hey! Come back here with that! 1121 01:18:43,552 --> 01:18:45,221 How you doing? 1122 01:18:45,304 --> 01:18:46,931 Anybody seen Bug around here? 1123 01:18:48,557 --> 01:18:49,975 Hey, nice music. 1124 01:18:51,101 --> 01:18:52,645 Who's that, The Grass Roots? 1125 01:18:53,020 --> 01:18:54,396 I'm kidding, I know my music. 1126 01:19:00,819 --> 01:19:03,030 Stop it, please. 1127 01:19:05,991 --> 01:19:08,035 What the hell is that? 1128 01:19:08,827 --> 01:19:11,830 Hey, party time! Let's get down here huh? 1129 01:19:11,914 --> 01:19:15,542 You seen Bug around here? You know who I'm talking about? You seen Bug? 1130 01:19:16,377 --> 01:19:18,003 That's good stuff. 1131 01:19:19,004 --> 01:19:20,589 Keep it up, keep it up. 1132 01:19:20,756 --> 01:19:22,299 Nice work. 1133 01:19:22,841 --> 01:19:26,011 Hey, how you doing? Excuse me. 1134 01:19:26,262 --> 01:19:27,763 Crowded huh? 1135 01:19:28,764 --> 01:19:31,267 Get down, get down, get down. 1136 01:19:31,517 --> 01:19:33,300 I don't want to do this. 1137 01:19:33,852 --> 01:19:35,688 Just relax. 1138 01:19:38,190 --> 01:19:39,566 Hello young fellow. How are ya? 1139 01:19:39,650 --> 01:19:41,694 I'm Tia Russell's uncle, Buck Russell. 1140 01:19:41,777 --> 01:19:43,570 Have you seen the Bug around? 1141 01:19:43,696 --> 01:19:45,614 No? I'm looking for him. 1142 01:19:45,698 --> 01:19:48,617 You're Tia Russell's uncle? Really? 1143 01:19:48,701 --> 01:19:51,203 Hey! Give me that! 1144 01:19:51,287 --> 01:19:53,372 Take my hat, ya punk. 1145 01:19:53,956 --> 01:19:54,957 Don't mention it. 1146 01:19:55,040 --> 01:19:56,166 All right pop. 1147 01:19:58,669 --> 01:20:00,087 Have you seen a guy named Bug have ya? 1148 01:20:00,170 --> 01:20:02,800 Everybody knows Bug. Hip, hip guy. You know... 1149 01:20:03,215 --> 01:20:06,302 Hey let me through here, will you? Your mother know you do that? 1150 01:20:10,347 --> 01:20:12,182 Hey this room's taken. 1151 01:20:12,975 --> 01:20:15,561 I want to go. No you don't. 1152 01:20:18,355 --> 01:20:21,525 That door opens, I'm gonna kick somebody's ass! 1153 01:20:22,943 --> 01:20:24,069 Do you hear me? 1154 01:22:16,473 --> 01:22:17,516 Tia. 1155 01:22:36,493 --> 01:22:38,036 You were right. 1156 01:22:39,830 --> 01:22:42,624 Everything you said would happen happened. 1157 01:22:44,418 --> 01:22:47,212 I don't want to talk about it. I just want to getcha home. 1158 01:23:22,581 --> 01:23:24,166 Is this a trick? 1159 01:23:29,379 --> 01:23:30,422 No. 1160 01:23:34,343 --> 01:23:36,261 You know what happened? 1161 01:23:38,931 --> 01:23:40,098 Yeah. 1162 01:23:43,769 --> 01:23:47,050 Are you going to tell my parents about everything that's been going on? 1163 01:23:49,483 --> 01:23:50,526 No. 1164 01:23:53,278 --> 01:23:54,450 Thanks. 1165 01:23:58,784 --> 01:24:01,912 I've been riding your butt all week about how you live your life. 1166 01:24:05,332 --> 01:24:08,377 I realize maybe somebody should have been riding mine. 1167 01:24:08,961 --> 01:24:12,631 I'm probably the last guy in the world you'd wanna help... 1168 01:24:15,133 --> 01:24:18,470 But I really could use your advice vis-a-vis Chanice. 1169 01:24:19,388 --> 01:24:26,100 I've been uhh, stringing her along, for about eight years now uhh... 1170 01:24:27,229 --> 01:24:30,065 Maybe you could figure out what the hell is wrong with me. 1171 01:24:30,983 --> 01:24:33,402 I did such a great job earning your trust and admiration 1172 01:24:33,485 --> 01:24:36,655 I'm confused why I can't do the same with Chanice. 1173 01:24:46,164 --> 01:24:48,000 You know there's uhh... 1174 01:24:50,627 --> 01:24:53,650 One family charity case that uhh... 1175 01:24:55,475 --> 01:24:57,050 Loves you very much. 1176 01:24:59,177 --> 01:25:00,512 I'm sorry. 1177 01:25:01,700 --> 01:25:03,250 Hey come on. 1178 01:25:03,974 --> 01:25:05,767 Nothing to be sorry about. 1179 01:25:06,852 --> 01:25:10,480 I'm just kinda, glad, I got a chance to know you again. 1180 01:25:15,569 --> 01:25:17,700 Did you do anything to Bug? 1181 01:25:24,369 --> 01:25:28,874 Oh my God! What did you do? 1182 01:25:40,218 --> 01:25:43,388 You shithead! I could have suffocated in here! 1183 01:25:43,472 --> 01:25:45,974 Um, do you know what I'd like you to do? 1184 01:25:46,058 --> 01:25:47,768 Actually, you could be doing both of us a favor. 1185 01:25:47,851 --> 01:25:50,062 I'd like you to apologize to the lady please. 1186 01:25:50,729 --> 01:25:52,939 I'm sorry! 1187 01:25:53,023 --> 01:25:54,316 I'm sorry! 1188 01:25:54,399 --> 01:25:56,109 Okay asshole? 1189 01:25:56,193 --> 01:25:57,903 I'm sorry! 1190 01:25:57,986 --> 01:26:01,400 I don't know if I told you this or not but uhh, I'm an amateur dentist. 1191 01:26:02,824 --> 01:26:04,150 Oh yes, he is. 1192 01:26:13,085 --> 01:26:14,419 I'm sorry. 1193 01:26:15,295 --> 01:26:16,546 Get him out of there. 1194 01:26:16,630 --> 01:26:17,756 Yeah? 1195 01:26:18,090 --> 01:26:19,758 It was halfhearted. We'll let him. Come on, here we go. 1196 01:26:19,841 --> 01:26:20,842 I'm, I'm, I'm really sorry. 1197 01:26:20,926 --> 01:26:23,011 I'm sure you are. I'm sure you are. 1198 01:26:23,095 --> 01:26:25,430 I-I am. Let me just getcha... 1199 01:26:25,722 --> 01:26:28,684 I didn't mean to hurt anybody. 1200 01:26:28,767 --> 01:26:29,893 There you go. There ya go. 1201 01:26:31,436 --> 01:26:32,938 Oh I'm sorry. 1202 01:26:40,112 --> 01:26:42,280 Shall we? Yeah. 1203 01:26:48,870 --> 01:26:51,998 Yeah? Well come on back, and I'll kick your ass man! 1204 01:26:52,082 --> 01:26:54,600 Chicken shit! You're dead! 1205 01:26:55,627 --> 01:26:56,753 Shit. 1206 01:27:03,009 --> 01:27:05,387 I'm gonna sue your balls off man! 1207 01:27:06,304 --> 01:27:08,473 Yeah. Why don't you come and get me man? 1208 01:27:08,557 --> 01:27:09,933 Come on! 1209 01:27:10,475 --> 01:27:11,893 Come on man! 1210 01:27:11,977 --> 01:27:15,021 I'm going to sue you, and I'm going to sue your whole family! 1211 01:27:15,522 --> 01:27:18,275 Okay pal. Time for a golf lesson. 1212 01:27:18,859 --> 01:27:20,944 My dad's a lawyer man, you're history! 1213 01:27:21,486 --> 01:27:23,405 A little 5-wood. 1214 01:27:24,740 --> 01:27:26,750 Hey. What? 1215 01:27:27,659 --> 01:27:29,327 What? What are you doing man? 1216 01:27:30,620 --> 01:27:31,872 Shit. 1217 01:27:32,664 --> 01:27:33,999 You're history man, you're wasted! 1218 01:27:34,082 --> 01:27:36,001 I'm gonna sue you for everything you've got man! 1219 01:27:36,334 --> 01:27:38,850 You're gonna be broke! So come on, come and get me! 1220 01:27:40,672 --> 01:27:42,799 You bastard! Aahhh! 1221 01:27:43,341 --> 01:27:44,634 Yes sir! 1222 01:27:45,177 --> 01:27:48,013 You, you son of a bitch! That hurt! 1223 01:27:48,180 --> 01:27:50,950 Hey, hey, hey. I'm not sorry, all right? 1224 01:27:52,184 --> 01:27:54,519 I ain't sorry for shit! 1225 01:27:57,647 --> 01:28:00,025 What do you see in that guy anyway? 1226 01:28:00,817 --> 01:28:03,278 I can't for the life of me figure that one out. 1227 01:28:03,945 --> 01:28:07,032 Don't answer. Don't answer. You don't have to. 1228 01:28:10,076 --> 01:28:13,121 I appreciate the confession Tia. Thank you. Thanks a lot. 1229 01:28:13,205 --> 01:28:14,676 But my problems with Buck 1230 01:28:14,706 --> 01:28:17,918 go a whole lot deeper than a misunderstanding with a neighbor lady. 1231 01:28:18,543 --> 01:28:20,712 Don't you think he loves you? 1232 01:28:22,088 --> 01:28:24,049 If he does, he'd never say it. 1233 01:28:24,883 --> 01:28:25,967 What if he did? 1234 01:28:26,051 --> 01:28:28,450 Then I would suspect he needed a new set of tires. 1235 01:28:29,679 --> 01:28:32,432 Seriously. Seriously. 1236 01:28:32,891 --> 01:28:35,393 You're very sweet to talk about this... 1237 01:28:35,894 --> 01:28:38,125 But I don't think you understand the bigger picture. 1238 01:28:38,271 --> 01:28:41,733 See Buck's a charming man, who wants to remain a boy forever. 1239 01:28:42,234 --> 01:28:43,235 Boy? 1240 01:28:43,568 --> 01:28:46,613 And at my age that doesn't make for a lasting relationship. 1241 01:28:46,800 --> 01:28:48,000 Well... 1242 01:28:49,658 --> 01:28:52,235 I think he'd make a wonderful husband and father. 1243 01:28:52,577 --> 01:28:54,496 You do? Oh yeah. 1244 01:28:54,996 --> 01:28:56,915 My sister and brother adore him. 1245 01:28:58,208 --> 01:29:02,212 He really has changed, since he's been here this week. 1246 01:29:03,129 --> 01:29:05,006 He really has changed. 1247 01:29:05,382 --> 01:29:06,967 He's responsible, 1248 01:29:07,759 --> 01:29:09,750 caring and loving 1249 01:29:10,929 --> 01:29:13,515 and, enthusiastic... 1250 01:29:14,766 --> 01:29:15,767 Energetic. 1251 01:29:16,101 --> 01:29:18,200 And energetic, and... 1252 01:29:19,020 --> 01:29:20,480 Decent and... 1253 01:29:21,857 --> 01:29:23,200 Kind and... 1254 01:29:26,278 --> 01:29:27,571 And humble, 1255 01:29:27,654 --> 01:29:29,800 and honest and forthright. 1256 01:29:30,448 --> 01:29:31,491 Sense of humor. 1257 01:29:31,616 --> 01:29:34,050 And he's really got a great sense of humor. 1258 01:29:34,119 --> 01:29:36,700 Did he by any chance put you up to this? 1259 01:29:36,788 --> 01:29:39,875 No! Oh no. Mmm-mmm. 1260 01:29:40,208 --> 01:29:42,752 No, I've just gathered this from my own observations. 1261 01:29:43,461 --> 01:29:44,546 No? Well... 1262 01:29:44,629 --> 01:29:46,214 No, it's just, the way he is. 1263 01:29:46,298 --> 01:29:47,507 Really? 1264 01:29:48,842 --> 01:29:49,843 Um! 1265 01:29:54,389 --> 01:29:55,390 Really? 1266 01:29:56,850 --> 01:29:59,250 Oh yeah! So unlike him. 1267 01:30:07,986 --> 01:30:09,100 Owww! 1268 01:30:15,452 --> 01:30:16,995 Check this out. 1269 01:30:23,001 --> 01:30:24,377 Hi honey! 1270 01:30:25,128 --> 01:30:27,150 Is the uhh, coffee ready? 1271 01:30:27,839 --> 01:30:29,507 A little thirsty. 1272 01:30:30,091 --> 01:30:33,350 By the way, I have told ya I loved ya. You know I... 1273 01:30:34,012 --> 01:30:36,514 and it wasn't for tires, sweetheart. 1274 01:30:36,932 --> 01:30:38,350 It was for shocks, remember? 1275 01:30:44,022 --> 01:30:46,191 Are they sweethearts or what? 1276 01:30:46,274 --> 01:30:48,193 This one's as smart as a whip. 1277 01:30:48,443 --> 01:30:50,111 I'm going to miss them like crazy. 1278 01:30:50,195 --> 01:30:52,614 They're beautiful children. What happened to you? 1279 01:30:53,156 --> 01:30:55,617 Recessive gene, skips every nine generations. 1280 01:30:55,700 --> 01:30:56,826 And I got it this time. 1281 01:30:56,910 --> 01:30:58,175 Mmm-hmm. Tragic. 1282 01:30:58,370 --> 01:31:00,205 It isn't so bad, is it? 1283 01:31:00,997 --> 01:31:02,082 What? 1284 01:31:02,165 --> 01:31:03,541 The house, the family, the kids. 1285 01:31:03,625 --> 01:31:06,670 Oh, oh, oh, oh yeah, yeah. No, it's great. This is great. 1286 01:31:07,545 --> 01:31:09,714 You know we should have done this a long time ago, 1287 01:31:09,798 --> 01:31:11,716 something like this, you know, you and I. 1288 01:31:26,481 --> 01:31:28,233 They're here! 1289 01:31:33,530 --> 01:31:35,198 What are we doing? 1290 01:31:36,533 --> 01:31:39,786 Well your mother you see, and your sister, 1291 01:31:40,036 --> 01:31:42,831 have to uhhm, sort some things out. 1292 01:31:42,914 --> 01:31:46,459 They have to sort things out. So we're going to be very quiet for them. 1293 01:31:46,543 --> 01:31:49,087 Alright so why don't, we put a button on it like this. 1294 01:31:53,091 --> 01:31:56,302 And a zipper, like that, and a lock. 1295 01:31:58,346 --> 01:32:00,807 I can't talk at all. I throw the key away. 1296 01:32:08,999 --> 01:32:13,999 ♪ Rhythm Of Life (1989) ♪ by Hugh Harris 1297 01:32:55,070 --> 01:32:56,780 It's gonna be real different. 1298 01:32:58,156 --> 01:32:59,616 I promise. 1299 01:33:00,366 --> 01:33:01,743 I love you. 1300 01:33:14,631 --> 01:33:15,715 Shit! 1301 01:33:15,840 --> 01:33:18,802 Bye! Bye, Uncle Buck! 1302 01:33:19,344 --> 01:33:22,222 Well could I get out the door please? 1303 01:33:22,305 --> 01:33:24,916 I'm going! Well this is heavy. 1304 01:33:25,100 --> 01:33:26,184 Bye! Bye! 1305 01:33:26,601 --> 01:33:28,515 Thanks again U.B. 1306 01:33:28,535 --> 01:33:31,950 Hey uh, next time you're downtown, maybe we can uhh, go out for a coffee. 1307 01:33:34,609 --> 01:33:35,652 Okay. 1308 01:33:36,986 --> 01:33:39,800 We really had a good time. I know it's kind of ridiculous. 1309 01:33:39,948 --> 01:33:41,199 We did leave the house a little messy. 1310 01:33:41,282 --> 01:33:42,990 We did try our best. You know, we're not so good at clean... 1311 01:33:43,034 --> 01:33:44,702 Chanice. What?! 1312 01:33:44,786 --> 01:33:46,400 We're going home, we're not dying. 1313 01:33:46,621 --> 01:33:48,164 OK, I'm saying goodbye, is that all right? 1314 01:33:48,331 --> 01:33:49,707 All right. Nice guy, isn't he? 1315 01:33:49,791 --> 01:33:51,346 Listen tell the neighbors, we're really sorry 1316 01:33:51,376 --> 01:33:53,753 about having that thing parked in the driveway all week. 1317 01:33:53,837 --> 01:33:56,131 You know, he's getting a new company car on Monday. 1318 01:33:56,214 --> 01:33:59,050 The hell I am! The beast is good for another 100,000 miles. 1319 01:33:59,134 --> 01:34:01,970 Yeah well, it's too bad that you're not. That's funny Chanice. That's really good. 1320 01:34:02,220 --> 01:34:03,221 See what I put up with? 1321 01:34:03,304 --> 01:34:06,224 Don't drive fast. I'm not fixing any more tickets for you. 1322 01:39:28,421 --> 01:39:30,047 Buck: Wake up!