1 00:02:26,200 --> 00:02:28,099 My sister Kate learned to swim when most babies... 2 00:02:28,129 --> 00:02:31,101 were still gnawing the sides of their playpens. 3 00:02:31,539 --> 00:02:33,769 I adore her. Everybody does. 4 00:02:34,001 --> 00:02:34,801 The day she was born, 5 00:02:34,831 --> 00:02:36,440 I wanted to name her after Saint Gobnet, 6 00:02:36,470 --> 00:02:38,002 the virgin beekeeper, 7 00:02:38,214 --> 00:02:41,672 But mother, Mrs. Flax, thought I was a little peculiar. 8 00:02:41,817 --> 00:02:42,841 I don't agree. 9 00:03:13,419 --> 00:03:16,752 Mrs. Flax doesn't believe in ritual or tradition. 10 00:03:23,630 --> 00:03:24,630 No. 11 00:03:33,909 --> 00:03:34,909 Maybe. 12 00:03:40,850 --> 00:03:41,850 I think so. 13 00:03:44,509 --> 00:03:46,568 But I'd wanted to repent since the first time... 14 00:03:46,598 --> 00:03:48,689 I saw a girl with ashes on her forehead... 15 00:03:48,719 --> 00:03:50,749 cross herself and chant Hail Marys... 16 00:03:50,779 --> 00:03:52,227 before a spelling bee. 17 00:03:54,210 --> 00:03:55,410 Charlotte, we're Jewish. 18 00:04:05,991 --> 00:04:07,071 What is this? 19 00:04:07,212 --> 00:04:09,874 Cheese ball pick-me-ups accompanied by miniature franks, 20 00:04:10,015 --> 00:04:13,747 and, for dessert... marshmallow kabobs. 21 00:04:16,155 --> 00:04:18,392 A word about Mrs. Flax and food. 22 00:04:18,422 --> 00:04:20,753 The word is hors d'oeuvres. 23 00:04:21,395 --> 00:04:23,192 "Fun Finger Foods" is her main source book, 24 00:04:23,330 --> 00:04:25,298 and that's all the woman cooks. 25 00:04:25,432 --> 00:04:28,561 "Anything more," she says, "is too big a commitment." 26 00:04:35,944 --> 00:04:38,344 It's Fred. Okay, how do I look? 27 00:04:38,415 --> 00:04:40,415 Like a woman about to go forth and sin. 28 00:04:40,575 --> 00:04:42,996 Oh, good, exactly the look I was hoping for. 29 00:04:45,016 --> 00:04:47,116 - Good night. - Don't wait up. 30 00:04:49,556 --> 00:04:51,917 Mrs. Flax is dating her boss. 31 00:05:09,218 --> 00:05:11,698 That means we'll be moving soon. 32 00:05:12,050 --> 00:05:15,248 Wait. Wait a minute. Wait. 33 00:05:19,158 --> 00:05:23,118 Did you just tell me that not only am I not going on this trip, 34 00:05:23,263 --> 00:05:25,493 but that you're taking another woman? 35 00:05:25,999 --> 00:05:28,433 Honey, she's not just "another woman." 36 00:05:28,569 --> 00:05:30,094 She's my wife. 37 00:05:31,039 --> 00:05:33,007 We've moved 18 times. 38 00:05:34,275 --> 00:05:36,300 It gets easy to read the signs. 39 00:05:55,584 --> 00:05:58,704 I feel I've wasted half my life in cars. 40 00:05:58,764 --> 00:06:00,404 I try to be charitable: 41 00:06:00,464 --> 00:06:03,025 taking care of Kate and not killing mother, 42 00:06:03,505 --> 00:06:04,525 But, I ask you, 43 00:06:04,625 --> 00:06:06,023 who ever heard the word of god... 44 00:06:06,053 --> 00:06:08,704 going 70 miles an hour on the interstate? 45 00:06:18,691 --> 00:06:20,935 President Kennedy arrived at Hyannis Port this afternoon, 46 00:06:20,965 --> 00:06:22,916 leaving the rigors of Washington behind. 47 00:06:22,946 --> 00:06:24,826 On hand to greet him as the Presidential helicopter 48 00:06:24,856 --> 00:06:26,827 touched down were his daughter... 49 00:06:31,805 --> 00:06:34,468 I don't think he wanted those gifts they gave him. 50 00:06:34,609 --> 00:06:36,873 Frankenstein and birds? 51 00:06:38,413 --> 00:06:39,708 No, sweetheart. 52 00:06:39,768 --> 00:06:41,768 The three wise men brought the baby Jesus... 53 00:06:41,798 --> 00:06:43,229 Frankincense and Myrrh. 54 00:06:43,469 --> 00:06:44,589 Oh. 55 00:06:46,289 --> 00:06:47,765 It's not that I don't know about these things. Charlotte 56 00:06:47,795 --> 00:06:49,486 Just I choose to believe something else. 57 00:06:49,660 --> 00:06:51,423 I got an idea. How about some fudge? 58 00:06:51,830 --> 00:06:52,830 Yeah. 59 00:06:52,930 --> 00:06:54,630 Charlotte, you want to go make some fudge? 60 00:06:54,765 --> 00:06:56,563 I can't do anything... 61 00:06:56,701 --> 00:06:59,363 until I have everything the way it was. 62 00:07:00,138 --> 00:07:01,710 Charlotte, the whole point of moving... 63 00:07:01,740 --> 00:07:03,712 is so that everything can be different. 64 00:07:03,952 --> 00:07:06,232 I don't like waking up and not knowing where I am. 65 00:07:06,732 --> 00:07:08,926 Well, then I'll make you a little sign for over your bed that says: 66 00:07:08,956 --> 00:07:09,871 "Good morning, Charlotte." 67 00:07:09,901 --> 00:07:10,950 "You are now in East Port." 68 00:07:10,980 --> 00:07:12,192 "Have a lovely day." 69 00:07:12,785 --> 00:07:13,872 Oklahoma was great. 70 00:07:14,012 --> 00:07:15,112 I liked living there. 71 00:07:15,232 --> 00:07:17,712 I know. And you'll love living here when you get used to it. 72 00:07:17,812 --> 00:07:19,843 Yeah, and when you get used to it, we'll move... 73 00:07:19,873 --> 00:07:21,168 and everything will change again. 74 00:07:21,198 --> 00:07:23,413 Life is change, Charlotte. Death is... 75 00:07:23,593 --> 00:07:25,593 dwelling on the past... 76 00:07:25,713 --> 00:07:28,094 or staying in one place too long. 77 00:07:30,705 --> 00:07:33,714 Charlotte, remind me to get you a decent pair of shoes. 78 00:07:33,774 --> 00:07:35,894 - I don't want any. - Don't be ridiculous, Charlotte. 79 00:07:35,944 --> 00:07:37,878 Every woman wants new shoes. 80 00:07:38,013 --> 00:07:39,421 But those are from him. 81 00:07:39,881 --> 00:07:41,595 "Him"? Oh, him. 82 00:07:42,217 --> 00:07:44,218 Charlotte says he'll visit one day. 83 00:07:44,254 --> 00:07:45,876 How will he know we're here? 84 00:07:46,416 --> 00:07:47,116 Charlotte, you know what? 85 00:07:47,146 --> 00:07:49,035 The only thing you can rely on about your father... 86 00:07:49,065 --> 00:07:51,417 is that he can't be relied on. 87 00:07:52,663 --> 00:07:54,631 Right there. Hold on, hold on. 88 00:07:54,765 --> 00:07:57,461 I only have one memory of my father. 89 00:07:57,597 --> 00:08:00,478 At least, I think it was my father. 90 00:08:11,549 --> 00:08:14,339 Honey, it's an Eclipse. Put these on. 91 00:08:28,660 --> 00:08:30,041 One day he'll come back. 92 00:08:30,138 --> 00:08:32,201 I just hope he can find us. 93 00:08:33,361 --> 00:08:37,722 Dear God, please don't let us be leaving right away. 94 00:08:37,842 --> 00:08:40,022 Please let me stop lying all the time. 95 00:08:40,602 --> 00:08:42,962 Please don't let me fall crazy in love so much... 96 00:08:43,042 --> 00:08:45,483 and please let someone fall crazy in love back. 97 00:08:45,983 --> 00:08:48,023 And please send me a sign. 98 00:08:48,958 --> 00:08:49,958 Amen. 99 00:09:02,245 --> 00:09:03,605 - Hello there. - Hello. 100 00:09:12,426 --> 00:09:14,485 - Hey! - Come on. 101 00:09:14,725 --> 00:09:16,886 "Chief maintenance man for apartment house or hotel." 102 00:09:18,246 --> 00:09:19,246 Let's move it, huh? 103 00:09:19,276 --> 00:09:22,432 "Experienced mechanic." "Sheet metal worker." 104 00:09:24,487 --> 00:09:25,857 Somehow... Charlotte, 105 00:09:25,887 --> 00:09:27,843 you drive like old people make love. 106 00:09:27,967 --> 00:09:30,857 Mom, I'm only 15. I get nervous. 107 00:09:30,887 --> 00:09:31,887 Move it over! 108 00:09:32,005 --> 00:09:33,847 Driving happens to be one of the two... 109 00:09:33,877 --> 00:09:36,108 most important skills a woman can have. 110 00:09:36,198 --> 00:09:38,123 You should be tickled pink that I taught you early. 111 00:09:38,153 --> 00:09:39,019 Let's go! 112 00:09:39,049 --> 00:09:40,769 Wait a minute. All right, this sounds good. 113 00:09:40,849 --> 00:09:42,448 "Bright, personable young secretary..." 114 00:09:42,478 --> 00:09:46,189 "with cheerful disposition required by small law firm." 115 00:09:47,509 --> 00:09:48,790 Why are you signaling? 116 00:09:48,890 --> 00:09:50,620 The turn is two miles down the road. 117 00:09:51,210 --> 00:09:52,250 All right, just pull over. 118 00:09:52,750 --> 00:09:53,750 Step on it! 119 00:09:54,210 --> 00:09:56,211 - Blow it out your ear! - Kate... 120 00:10:19,113 --> 00:10:20,733 Hi. 121 00:10:21,294 --> 00:10:24,457 I just wondered if you got moved in all right. 122 00:10:24,597 --> 00:10:26,360 Yeah, we got moved in fine. 123 00:10:28,202 --> 00:10:31,000 My name's Joe Peretti. I work up the hill. 124 00:10:31,772 --> 00:10:36,176 So if you need anything done, Ma'am... 125 00:10:36,311 --> 00:10:37,801 "Ma'am"? 126 00:10:40,015 --> 00:10:43,042 Well, what exactly is up the hill, Mr. Peretti? 127 00:10:43,256 --> 00:10:44,756 The convent. 128 00:10:45,421 --> 00:10:47,412 Protectors of the blessed souls. 129 00:10:47,896 --> 00:10:49,356 This is a sign. Thank you, God. 130 00:10:49,456 --> 00:10:51,037 This is a real sign. 131 00:10:51,257 --> 00:10:53,617 Our nearest neighbors are nuns? 132 00:10:54,932 --> 00:10:57,628 I suppose you think this is divine providence? 133 00:10:58,903 --> 00:11:01,358 You know what? There is one small thing, Joe. 134 00:11:01,498 --> 00:11:04,158 - Here. That porch swing up there? - Yeah? 135 00:11:04,258 --> 00:11:06,159 I just can't seem to reach it. 136 00:11:06,259 --> 00:11:09,178 Okay. I'll take a look. 137 00:11:20,259 --> 00:11:23,457 So, Joe, how old did you say you were? 138 00:11:27,800 --> 00:11:29,411 Twenty-six and cute as a button. 139 00:11:29,501 --> 00:11:31,241 Too bad you're set on being a nun. 140 00:11:34,501 --> 00:11:35,361 You know, Charlotte, 141 00:11:35,441 --> 00:11:37,521 I think you might be old enough for a boyfriend now. 142 00:11:38,447 --> 00:11:40,642 If I'm old enough, maybe you're too old. 143 00:11:41,762 --> 00:11:42,762 Don't be ridiculous. 144 00:11:42,812 --> 00:11:44,963 A real woman is never too old. 145 00:12:14,466 --> 00:12:18,217 Let's go! Let's go! 146 00:13:10,632 --> 00:13:11,633 Please, God, 147 00:13:11,723 --> 00:13:14,673 don't let me fall in love and want to do disgusting things. 148 00:13:22,673 --> 00:13:25,103 Dear God, I love the way he throws. 149 00:13:40,279 --> 00:13:42,281 Come on. 150 00:13:46,489 --> 00:13:48,320 Mrs. Flax... 151 00:13:48,776 --> 00:13:50,527 I'm taking my fiancée out to lunch. 152 00:13:50,627 --> 00:13:52,477 I expect you to be here when I return. 153 00:13:52,961 --> 00:13:55,062 Hi, sweetie. 154 00:13:55,637 --> 00:13:57,878 How are those depositions coming? 155 00:13:57,928 --> 00:14:00,058 They'll be ready. 156 00:14:03,675 --> 00:14:04,678 Assholes. 157 00:14:17,791 --> 00:14:19,330 Do you like your new boss, Mom? 158 00:14:19,520 --> 00:14:20,920 No, sweetheart, I don't. 159 00:14:21,391 --> 00:14:22,181 You make out the list? 160 00:14:22,296 --> 00:14:23,556 Yeah. Kate needs a new swimsuit. 161 00:14:23,586 --> 00:14:25,380 I need notebooks, pens and underwear. 162 00:14:25,760 --> 00:14:27,405 All right, I only have a half an hour for lunch, 163 00:14:27,435 --> 00:14:28,670 so after we pick out the shoes, 164 00:14:28,730 --> 00:14:31,331 - Then I'll give you money and you can buy the rest. - Okay. 165 00:14:31,431 --> 00:14:32,731 - I want red ones. - All right. 166 00:14:32,831 --> 00:14:34,281 - Bright red ones. - All right. 167 00:14:34,408 --> 00:14:35,966 - With a red strap. - Yes, Katie. 168 00:14:36,544 --> 00:14:39,708 - I don't need anything. - Charlotte, don't aggravate me. 169 00:14:40,082 --> 00:14:42,407 You're starting a new school on Monday and those boots aren't. 170 00:14:42,437 --> 00:14:44,482 - What's wrong with them? - Everything! 171 00:14:50,693 --> 00:14:53,322 - Because I'm the best mother in the world. - Yes. 172 00:14:53,484 --> 00:14:54,584 I'll be right with you. 173 00:14:55,644 --> 00:14:57,234 Hail Mary, full of grace. 174 00:15:00,705 --> 00:15:02,765 - Katydid. - Let me try them on. 175 00:15:08,681 --> 00:15:10,342 You must be Mrs. Flax. 176 00:15:10,816 --> 00:15:11,925 Joseph told us... 177 00:15:11,955 --> 00:15:14,526 that a nice Jewish family were our new neighbors. 178 00:15:15,086 --> 00:15:16,927 Welcome to East Port. 179 00:15:17,858 --> 00:15:20,156 Oh, God, please let Mrs. Flax control herself. 180 00:15:20,727 --> 00:15:23,768 - Look, Mom. - You're still a perfect seven, Reverend Mother. 181 00:15:23,928 --> 00:15:26,768 You know, most women's feet get bigger. 182 00:15:26,888 --> 00:15:28,087 Only if they marry. 183 00:15:29,067 --> 00:15:31,187 - Oh, no. - Your feet swell. 184 00:15:31,688 --> 00:15:33,768 When you get pregnant, your feet swell. 185 00:15:33,875 --> 00:15:35,648 How could she? How could she? 186 00:15:36,338 --> 00:15:38,138 I know mine got swollen when I was pregnant. 187 00:15:39,439 --> 00:15:41,868 Mother, how could you say that? 188 00:15:41,898 --> 00:15:43,869 She's a holy vessel. 189 00:15:45,839 --> 00:15:47,650 What a lovely red shoe. 190 00:15:47,830 --> 00:15:48,930 Thank you. 191 00:15:50,593 --> 00:15:52,493 So where are you ladies from? 192 00:15:52,629 --> 00:15:55,155 I used to live in South Dakota myself. 193 00:15:56,531 --> 00:15:57,531 Can you imagine... 194 00:15:58,291 --> 00:16:00,841 trying to keep Kosher in South Dakota? 195 00:16:01,071 --> 00:16:03,192 I can't imagine trying to keep Kosher anywhere. 196 00:16:03,492 --> 00:16:04,532 Yeah. 197 00:16:07,279 --> 00:16:09,372 Will that be all, Reverend Mother? 198 00:16:09,942 --> 00:16:11,143 Only one new addition? 199 00:16:11,984 --> 00:16:14,993 Every year, fewer and fewer of us now. 200 00:16:16,073 --> 00:16:18,413 Nice to meet you, Mrs. Flax. 201 00:16:18,525 --> 00:16:21,255 I hope you enjoy living in East Port. 202 00:16:22,444 --> 00:16:23,494 Yes, dear? 203 00:16:23,994 --> 00:16:26,124 I desperately wanted to ask what color her bra was... 204 00:16:26,224 --> 00:16:28,170 and if she had pure thoughts every second of the day, 205 00:16:28,200 --> 00:16:29,245 but... 206 00:16:31,171 --> 00:16:33,196 Well, good-bye. 207 00:16:56,464 --> 00:16:58,566 Oh! 208 00:16:59,437 --> 00:17:01,848 She's got a pair that she likes. What about you? 209 00:17:03,018 --> 00:17:04,598 I don't need any shoes. Thank you. 210 00:17:10,749 --> 00:17:11,779 Nice boots. 211 00:17:17,450 --> 00:17:20,100 Maybe I'll see you at the Parent & Teachers' Night. 212 00:17:20,250 --> 00:17:21,286 Maybe you will. 213 00:17:22,701 --> 00:17:26,901 Oh... Good. Yeah. I'd like that. 214 00:17:36,081 --> 00:17:37,082 Yeah. 215 00:17:38,902 --> 00:17:40,002 Come on, Miss Katydid, 216 00:17:40,102 --> 00:17:41,782 we're gonna be late for registration. 217 00:17:47,083 --> 00:17:49,783 - Bye, Sergeant. - Bye, Fish Head. 218 00:17:57,234 --> 00:18:00,295 Well, look who's driving the school bus. 219 00:18:06,475 --> 00:18:08,966 Why, Miss Charlotte, I do believe you're blushing. 220 00:18:31,549 --> 00:18:34,638 Come on. Don't make such a deal about it. 221 00:18:34,885 --> 00:18:36,788 Just put it in your mouth and smoke it. 222 00:18:36,944 --> 00:18:39,140 - I can't. Mary, I'll throw up all over. - So... 223 00:18:40,609 --> 00:18:43,287 How was your date with Scott Jones, Mary? 224 00:18:43,409 --> 00:18:44,509 He's an animal. 225 00:18:45,409 --> 00:18:46,789 Does that mean you had a good time? 226 00:18:46,819 --> 00:18:49,520 We had oral sex by the old railroad trestle. 227 00:18:49,650 --> 00:18:51,650 I love it when they groan, 228 00:18:52,030 --> 00:18:53,170 don't you? 229 00:18:53,296 --> 00:18:55,492 Mary, you're gonna get into a heap of trouble. 230 00:18:55,611 --> 00:18:57,951 I know. I can't wait. 231 00:18:59,671 --> 00:19:00,791 Girls. 232 00:19:02,491 --> 00:19:04,212 The bell rang five minutes ago. 233 00:19:04,312 --> 00:19:05,652 Sorry, Mrs. Crain. 234 00:19:06,212 --> 00:19:07,912 If she tells my mother, I'm dead. 235 00:19:32,407 --> 00:19:34,808 - Noree? - Here. 236 00:19:39,115 --> 00:19:40,815 Class, we have a new student today. 237 00:19:40,915 --> 00:19:42,116 Charlotte Flax. 238 00:19:42,676 --> 00:19:45,084 I'm sure you'll all do your best to make her feel welcome. 239 00:19:45,556 --> 00:19:47,096 Charlotte. 240 00:19:47,216 --> 00:19:50,017 Charlotte, right down there. 241 00:19:50,167 --> 00:19:52,557 Charlotte Flax, Right? 242 00:19:52,677 --> 00:19:54,557 F-I-a-x. Here. 243 00:19:57,097 --> 00:19:58,418 - Uh, Kent? - Here. 244 00:20:03,418 --> 00:20:04,678 Bye. 245 00:20:10,559 --> 00:20:13,100 Talk to me, Joe. Please talk to me. 246 00:20:14,920 --> 00:20:16,454 So how do you like the house? 247 00:20:18,560 --> 00:20:19,800 Sorry? 248 00:20:24,801 --> 00:20:25,861 How do you like the house? 249 00:20:27,101 --> 00:20:28,327 I hate the house. 250 00:20:29,122 --> 00:20:30,404 I was born there. 251 00:20:30,622 --> 00:20:31,922 I love that house. 252 00:20:32,022 --> 00:20:33,042 You were? 253 00:20:33,502 --> 00:20:34,682 Under the kitchen table. 254 00:20:35,877 --> 00:20:39,103 God strike me down. That's almost as good as a manger. 255 00:20:39,563 --> 00:20:41,562 Give me strength not to sit on his lap. 256 00:20:42,922 --> 00:20:44,923 Um... 257 00:20:45,323 --> 00:20:48,503 So was that you who carved "Red Sox" on the door? 258 00:20:50,103 --> 00:20:51,503 That used to be my room. 259 00:20:52,324 --> 00:20:53,564 I'm in his room. 260 00:20:54,324 --> 00:20:55,564 When my mother died, 261 00:20:55,624 --> 00:20:57,584 I sat on my bed for two days holding her sweater. 262 00:20:57,804 --> 00:21:00,125 I didn't care about anything anymore, 263 00:21:00,225 --> 00:21:01,899 not even the Red Sox. 264 00:21:02,325 --> 00:21:04,234 I'm gonna burn in hell for sure. 265 00:21:04,408 --> 00:21:06,511 He's talking about his poor dead mother, 266 00:21:06,565 --> 00:21:09,126 and I can't stop wishing his hands were unbuttoning my dress. 267 00:21:14,686 --> 00:21:15,687 Okay. 268 00:21:17,127 --> 00:21:20,326 That will be Carrie. She sells cosmetics. 269 00:21:20,460 --> 00:21:23,127 Oh... She's gonna love my Mom. 270 00:21:29,470 --> 00:21:30,470 Okay. 271 00:21:33,241 --> 00:21:35,766 I was gonna ask, I was wondering, 272 00:21:35,911 --> 00:21:38,379 what do people do here on the weekends? 273 00:21:41,350 --> 00:21:43,510 Sunday's my day off. 274 00:21:43,685 --> 00:21:44,685 Sometimes I go fishing. 275 00:21:46,288 --> 00:21:50,055 Really? I love to fish. 276 00:21:50,193 --> 00:21:53,880 Well, sometimes I just sit by the water and think. 277 00:21:56,733 --> 00:21:58,132 That sounds great too. 278 00:22:00,191 --> 00:22:02,812 Well, Maybe you and your sister... 279 00:22:02,932 --> 00:22:04,132 Oh, well, um... 280 00:22:04,572 --> 00:22:06,571 Kate's actually scared of the water, 281 00:22:06,601 --> 00:22:07,163 Oh. 282 00:22:07,193 --> 00:22:09,712 But, um... I'd love to. 283 00:22:14,233 --> 00:22:16,333 Well, I drive right by here on my way to the cliffs, 284 00:22:16,513 --> 00:22:18,234 so... 285 00:22:19,334 --> 00:22:20,334 What time? 286 00:22:20,734 --> 00:22:21,734 Seven. 287 00:22:22,334 --> 00:22:23,514 Okay, that sounds great. 288 00:22:24,764 --> 00:22:26,995 Okay, I'll wait for you. 289 00:22:27,134 --> 00:22:28,601 - Okay, bye. - Okay, bye. 290 00:22:38,576 --> 00:22:40,736 Know your colors and know your fabrics. 291 00:22:40,836 --> 00:22:42,517 That's what I tell all my little girls. 292 00:22:43,517 --> 00:22:45,986 Honey, I would kill to have your hair. 293 00:22:46,116 --> 00:22:48,166 Swimming's fine for your figure, 294 00:22:48,196 --> 00:22:49,987 but it can damage your hair. 295 00:22:50,037 --> 00:22:52,037 Got anything for Sharks and Jellyfish? 296 00:22:52,161 --> 00:22:54,152 - What, dear? - She means body grease. 297 00:22:54,297 --> 00:22:56,457 Miss Kate's going to swim the English Channel one day. 298 00:22:58,068 --> 00:23:01,265 Oh. Well, I'm not sure I have exactly what you're looking for, 299 00:23:02,338 --> 00:23:03,738 but try this. 300 00:23:05,239 --> 00:23:06,338 It was meant for crow's feet, 301 00:23:06,368 --> 00:23:08,139 but never really caught on. 302 00:23:09,514 --> 00:23:12,039 You are finished. 303 00:23:13,452 --> 00:23:15,044 Now, why don't you try the other side? 304 00:23:18,090 --> 00:23:21,458 Tell me about that Caretaker, the one at the convent. 305 00:23:21,741 --> 00:23:24,841 You mean Joey? Is he handsome or is he handsome? 306 00:23:25,341 --> 00:23:27,641 In high school, he was quite the golden boy. 307 00:23:27,741 --> 00:23:29,942 No one could touch him on a football field. 308 00:23:30,042 --> 00:23:33,642 Then in the middle of his senior year, he lost it. 309 00:23:33,742 --> 00:23:35,542 He couldn't run to save his life. 310 00:23:36,243 --> 00:23:40,643 His girlfriend had just left town kind of sudden. 311 00:23:41,650 --> 00:23:43,345 My theory? 312 00:23:43,485 --> 00:23:46,580 I believe there's a little Joey junior walking around somewhere. 313 00:23:47,344 --> 00:23:48,842 If I wasn't married to a real son of a gun, 314 00:23:48,872 --> 00:23:50,643 I'd go after him myself. 315 00:23:51,527 --> 00:23:53,120 Joey, Joey, Joey. 316 00:23:53,263 --> 00:23:56,130 Entering the convent for the sin of getting a girl pregnant. 317 00:23:56,266 --> 00:23:59,429 A penitent man. Makes me love you even more. 318 00:23:59,585 --> 00:24:04,337 Oh, honey... You have very special eyes. 319 00:24:05,076 --> 00:24:07,357 Only you and Liz Taylor can get away with those eyebrows. 320 00:24:07,446 --> 00:24:08,446 Come. 321 00:24:08,480 --> 00:24:10,345 Let's put some color on you. 322 00:24:13,346 --> 00:24:15,126 This one's planning on being a nun. 323 00:24:24,648 --> 00:24:25,848 Difficult age. 324 00:24:25,948 --> 00:24:28,148 All Charlotte's ages are difficult. 325 00:24:32,949 --> 00:24:34,804 You never came to Parent & Teacher Night before. 326 00:24:34,834 --> 00:24:36,629 I don't see what's so special about this one. 327 00:24:36,749 --> 00:24:38,449 Charlotte, you read the invitation. 328 00:24:38,650 --> 00:24:40,850 "Community begins in the classroom." 329 00:24:40,950 --> 00:24:42,120 I am your mother. 330 00:24:42,150 --> 00:24:45,277 It is my job to watch over your education. 331 00:24:46,288 --> 00:24:48,018 There's so little of it left. 332 00:24:48,251 --> 00:24:49,521 What took you so long? 333 00:24:49,551 --> 00:24:51,111 Ooh, we're gonna play my favorite game. 334 00:24:51,150 --> 00:24:53,150 Who's the worst mother in the world? 335 00:24:53,710 --> 00:24:55,710 Don't tell me. Let me guess. Who could it be? 336 00:24:55,740 --> 00:24:57,151 Could it be me? 337 00:25:01,351 --> 00:25:03,552 All right, you know what? I'll make you a deal. 338 00:25:03,652 --> 00:25:06,837 You stop being a little bitch for let's say an hour or two, 339 00:25:06,952 --> 00:25:09,592 and I won't knock the religion of your choice for a week. 340 00:25:10,453 --> 00:25:11,453 Deal. 341 00:25:14,253 --> 00:25:15,880 - Who's that? - That's Mr. Crain. 342 00:25:16,021 --> 00:25:17,834 He's my history teacher, and he's very nice. 343 00:25:18,124 --> 00:25:21,854 - He is an asshole. - You haven't spoken to him yet. 344 00:25:22,134 --> 00:25:24,454 Charlotte, I don't need to speak to him. 345 00:25:24,854 --> 00:25:26,595 He's driving an Edsel, for Chrissake. 346 00:25:28,355 --> 00:25:29,355 Okay. 347 00:25:35,156 --> 00:25:36,355 We don't have a prayer against... 348 00:25:36,385 --> 00:25:38,856 Stockton's little league if you don't release him... 349 00:25:38,956 --> 00:25:41,878 Some agendas here and there's some refreshments in, um... 350 00:25:45,054 --> 00:25:46,487 Uh... Mrs. Flax, hi. 351 00:25:46,622 --> 00:25:48,357 I'm glad you came tonight. 352 00:25:48,457 --> 00:25:50,958 You have two weeks. I'm asking for one day. 353 00:25:51,058 --> 00:25:52,333 - I'll think about it. - Thanks, Coach. 354 00:25:52,363 --> 00:25:53,667 - Hi, Mr. Landsky. - Hi. 355 00:25:53,697 --> 00:25:54,756 How are you? Is your mom here? 356 00:25:54,786 --> 00:25:56,592 Yeah. Right over there. 357 00:25:58,008 --> 00:25:59,207 I've been meaning to get in touch... 358 00:25:59,237 --> 00:26:00,208 Hi. 359 00:26:03,558 --> 00:26:04,558 How are you? 360 00:26:04,719 --> 00:26:06,219 Good. Even better now. 361 00:26:06,859 --> 00:26:08,329 - Excuse me. - Sorry. 362 00:26:08,359 --> 00:26:09,459 Any of these yours? 363 00:26:09,719 --> 00:26:12,139 Oh, no, mine are grown and long gone. 364 00:26:12,818 --> 00:26:15,286 - Lou, how you doin'? - Hi. Fine. 365 00:26:15,360 --> 00:26:18,356 And where's Mrs. Landsky tonight? 366 00:26:19,260 --> 00:26:20,721 She's long gone too. 367 00:26:20,961 --> 00:26:22,889 Oh, so you're a widower man? 368 00:26:23,661 --> 00:26:25,761 Oh, no. She's just gone. 369 00:26:25,930 --> 00:26:27,141 Oh. 370 00:26:27,701 --> 00:26:28,842 Would you like some punch? 371 00:26:29,070 --> 00:26:30,662 - Sure. - This way. 372 00:26:31,222 --> 00:26:33,722 She just up and left one day... 373 00:26:33,841 --> 00:26:35,706 right in the middle of vacuuming. 374 00:26:35,844 --> 00:26:37,539 She didn't even switch the damn thing off. 375 00:26:48,157 --> 00:26:49,784 Is there a Mr. Flax? 376 00:26:49,926 --> 00:26:53,165 No. He, too, made a rather sudden and unexpected departure. 377 00:26:53,365 --> 00:26:54,825 Not in the middle of vacuuming? 378 00:26:54,865 --> 00:26:56,763 No, I was in the middle of labor with Charlotte. 379 00:26:56,793 --> 00:26:59,599 - Yeah? - Yeah, and to add insult to injury, 380 00:27:00,265 --> 00:27:02,465 the son of a bitch stole my car to leave in. 381 00:27:02,565 --> 00:27:03,725 - Yeah? - Yeah, 382 00:27:03,845 --> 00:27:04,725 it was a great car: 383 00:27:04,755 --> 00:27:07,216 Red Buick convertible, white sidewall tires. 384 00:27:07,266 --> 00:27:09,146 When I think about it, it still pisses me off. 385 00:27:09,566 --> 00:27:11,846 It's kind of obvious it really means a lot to you. 386 00:27:12,146 --> 00:27:14,141 I remember the first time I got behind the wheel of that car. 387 00:27:14,171 --> 00:27:16,467 I thought, "Rachel, this is heaven." 388 00:27:16,567 --> 00:27:17,666 Cars mean freedom. 389 00:27:17,696 --> 00:27:18,966 If you hate a place, 390 00:27:18,996 --> 00:27:21,967 you can get in your car, Poof, you're gone. 391 00:27:23,564 --> 00:27:25,623 So your first love was a Buick? 392 00:27:25,799 --> 00:27:27,790 Yeah, before I met my husband. 393 00:27:27,968 --> 00:27:30,228 Big mistake. One of many. 394 00:27:30,969 --> 00:27:33,469 Are we talking cars or men? 395 00:27:33,569 --> 00:27:36,169 I don't know. I've been taken for a ride by both of them. 396 00:27:42,184 --> 00:27:44,345 - Mrs. Flax. - Yes, Mr. Landsky. 397 00:27:44,470 --> 00:27:46,671 I, uh... 398 00:27:46,771 --> 00:27:48,941 I try not to get involved with women... 399 00:27:48,971 --> 00:27:50,882 when the World Series is about to start, 400 00:27:50,971 --> 00:27:52,722 but, 401 00:27:52,851 --> 00:27:55,172 for you, I'd make an exception. 402 00:27:56,167 --> 00:27:58,611 - Should I take that as a compliment? - Oh, yes. 403 00:27:58,971 --> 00:28:02,732 I would really like to know you a whole lot better. 404 00:28:03,152 --> 00:28:04,232 So call me Lou. 405 00:28:05,843 --> 00:28:07,743 So, Lou, call me. 406 00:28:10,733 --> 00:28:12,853 How about Sunday? I'm free all day. 407 00:28:13,373 --> 00:28:14,473 How about breakfast? 408 00:28:16,373 --> 00:28:17,373 Great. 409 00:28:18,391 --> 00:28:20,052 I'll bring bagels. 410 00:28:20,674 --> 00:28:22,674 - I'll be there. - So will I. 411 00:28:25,375 --> 00:28:27,375 You see that woman there? 412 00:28:27,675 --> 00:28:29,375 - Yes. - That's my Mom. 413 00:28:30,155 --> 00:28:32,735 When I grow up, I want to be just like yours. 414 00:28:37,096 --> 00:28:39,736 Mary... You already are. 415 00:28:47,097 --> 00:28:48,954 I'll make real sandwiches; 416 00:28:49,054 --> 00:28:51,078 Big ones a man can sink his teeth into... 417 00:28:51,128 --> 00:28:53,178 and use both hands to hold. 418 00:28:55,878 --> 00:28:56,879 He's late. 419 00:28:56,979 --> 00:28:59,349 Oh, god, please don't let him forget. 420 00:28:59,379 --> 00:29:00,578 Be patient, Charlotte. 421 00:29:00,678 --> 00:29:02,128 Patient as Saint Bridget, 422 00:29:02,158 --> 00:29:04,399 lady-in-waiting to Queen Blanche of Namur. 423 00:29:04,542 --> 00:29:05,879 It's after 7:00, Charlotte. 424 00:29:05,979 --> 00:29:07,239 He's late. 425 00:29:08,379 --> 00:29:10,579 I will not start the day with an argument. 426 00:29:10,629 --> 00:29:13,720 I will tally up my evil thoughts for the week and ignore her. 427 00:29:13,980 --> 00:29:16,780 When a man's late, it's time to clear the decks. 428 00:29:39,648 --> 00:29:41,809 - No! - What? 429 00:29:47,384 --> 00:29:49,384 Forget it. Never mind. 430 00:29:59,886 --> 00:30:01,886 Don't do anything I wouldn't do. 431 00:30:05,185 --> 00:30:07,186 Or don't do anything I would. 432 00:30:26,399 --> 00:30:28,833 Rachel Flax. 433 00:30:43,190 --> 00:30:45,750 I want to scream out the window like a maniac, 434 00:30:46,251 --> 00:30:48,391 "I'm running away with the Caretaker man!" 435 00:30:49,171 --> 00:30:50,250 My speedometer's broken. 436 00:30:50,280 --> 00:30:52,031 I'm trying not to drive too fast. 437 00:30:52,591 --> 00:30:53,391 After my Mom, 438 00:30:53,491 --> 00:30:55,172 nothing seems fast. 439 00:30:56,892 --> 00:30:58,692 Now my lips are touching his. 440 00:30:59,904 --> 00:31:01,394 She seems like a nice person. 441 00:31:02,407 --> 00:31:06,672 Oh, yeah... She is... and a wonderful Mom. 442 00:31:17,394 --> 00:31:18,874 Oh, God! 443 00:31:20,626 --> 00:31:23,174 My whole life I never saw anybody treat a bagel this way. 444 00:31:23,494 --> 00:31:24,494 Where were you raised? 445 00:31:24,694 --> 00:31:25,735 Well, believe it or not, 446 00:31:25,795 --> 00:31:28,175 my parents owned a Kosher bakery. 447 00:31:28,695 --> 00:31:30,195 Yeah, they made me crazy, of course. 448 00:31:30,895 --> 00:31:32,495 And the night I ran away from home, 449 00:31:32,595 --> 00:31:34,246 I stood in the kitchen, 450 00:31:34,346 --> 00:31:37,196 Cigarette in one hand, ham sandwich in another. 451 00:31:37,396 --> 00:31:38,896 Why were you running away? 452 00:31:39,196 --> 00:31:41,167 I had my High School Diploma, 453 00:31:41,197 --> 00:31:42,877 my first paycheck, why would I stay? 454 00:31:43,297 --> 00:31:44,267 Hi. Bye. 455 00:31:44,297 --> 00:31:44,997 Wait a minute. 456 00:31:45,027 --> 00:31:46,037 Katie... 457 00:31:46,597 --> 00:31:47,697 Bye, Mom. 458 00:31:48,177 --> 00:31:49,178 Bye, honey. 459 00:31:49,258 --> 00:31:50,384 Bye. Mr. Landsky. 460 00:31:50,498 --> 00:31:51,498 Bye. 461 00:31:56,399 --> 00:31:57,759 Where did you meet your husband? 462 00:31:57,859 --> 00:32:00,879 In a writing class. He liked my poems. 463 00:32:03,399 --> 00:32:05,740 So we moved into a one-room apartment. 464 00:32:06,040 --> 00:32:07,998 It was a dump, but if you stood on a chair... 465 00:32:08,028 --> 00:32:09,759 you could see Lake Michigan. 466 00:32:10,499 --> 00:32:12,500 Must have been tough times when he left, 467 00:32:12,600 --> 00:32:13,699 raising the kid on your own. 468 00:32:13,729 --> 00:32:15,000 I coped. 469 00:32:20,501 --> 00:32:21,501 Um... 470 00:32:21,761 --> 00:32:23,041 Who was Kate's father? 471 00:32:23,930 --> 00:32:25,426 - Are you always this nosy? - This nosy? 472 00:32:25,456 --> 00:32:27,902 No. Small-town boy. 473 00:32:28,002 --> 00:32:30,002 I like to know other people's business. 474 00:32:30,102 --> 00:32:31,102 Do you mind? 475 00:32:31,182 --> 00:32:32,882 No. When I mind, you'll know I mind. 476 00:32:33,102 --> 00:32:34,402 It's kind of obvious. 477 00:32:34,902 --> 00:32:36,403 So who was he? 478 00:32:37,043 --> 00:32:39,403 Well, actually, I never caught his name. 479 00:32:39,583 --> 00:32:41,377 He came to Saint Louis for a Swim Meet. 480 00:32:41,516 --> 00:32:43,504 And if he won, he was headed for the Olympics. 481 00:32:43,764 --> 00:32:45,044 You were on the same team? 482 00:32:45,504 --> 00:32:47,404 No, I was the maid in his hotel. 483 00:32:48,704 --> 00:32:49,904 And one night, 484 00:32:50,004 --> 00:32:52,505 I delivered more than his towels. 485 00:32:57,605 --> 00:32:59,306 You're a hell of a woman, Rachel. 486 00:32:59,406 --> 00:33:00,406 I know. 487 00:33:01,606 --> 00:33:03,606 Gosh, it's been a memorable breakfast. 488 00:33:04,206 --> 00:33:05,406 I'm glad you liked it. 489 00:33:05,706 --> 00:33:08,207 I didn't say I liked it. I'm never going to forget it. 490 00:33:10,207 --> 00:33:13,586 - Oh, I'm sorry. No offense. - No. None taken. 491 00:33:14,767 --> 00:33:15,767 Uh... 492 00:33:16,355 --> 00:33:17,355 Okay. Uh... 493 00:33:18,724 --> 00:33:19,724 You, uh... 494 00:33:21,393 --> 00:33:22,691 What you want to do? 495 00:33:22,808 --> 00:33:24,408 We got all day. 496 00:33:25,308 --> 00:33:26,768 You want to go out someplace? 497 00:33:39,370 --> 00:33:41,210 Do you want to go out someplace? 498 00:33:43,950 --> 00:33:45,510 Not really. No. 499 00:33:47,911 --> 00:33:49,271 Do you want to go out someplace? 500 00:33:49,371 --> 00:33:51,718 No, I'm fine. 501 00:33:56,132 --> 00:33:59,132 So, Joe, tell me about the nuns in the convent. 502 00:33:59,212 --> 00:34:00,988 Do they wear underwear in the shower? 503 00:34:01,052 --> 00:34:02,893 I don't believe I said that. 504 00:34:03,053 --> 00:34:04,772 You know, I always I'm too embarrassed... 505 00:34:04,802 --> 00:34:06,653 to take a shower after gym. 506 00:34:06,733 --> 00:34:09,214 Mary O’Brien she dances around naked, 507 00:34:09,314 --> 00:34:11,954 screaming about her boyfriend's quivering loins. 508 00:34:12,114 --> 00:34:14,591 Shut up, Charlotte. Shut up. 509 00:34:16,193 --> 00:34:17,514 The boat's down there. 510 00:34:20,559 --> 00:34:21,559 Please, god, 511 00:34:21,614 --> 00:34:22,893 let him throw me on the ground... 512 00:34:22,923 --> 00:34:24,414 and make another Joey junior. 513 00:34:30,615 --> 00:34:32,916 - You okay? - Yeah, I'm fine, thanks. 514 00:34:43,137 --> 00:34:45,897 I do want to be good and virtuous, 515 00:34:45,957 --> 00:34:47,817 but it isn't easy. 516 00:34:47,917 --> 00:34:49,058 Come on. 517 00:35:10,020 --> 00:35:13,421 Do you want to bait your own hook or do you want me to do it? 518 00:35:14,021 --> 00:35:17,720 Mary, Mother of God... He still wants to fish? 519 00:35:23,781 --> 00:35:24,781 What's funny? 520 00:35:24,901 --> 00:35:26,521 You're a sexy guy. 521 00:35:27,322 --> 00:35:29,202 You have to look surprised when you say that? 522 00:35:29,436 --> 00:35:30,722 - I am surprised. - Oh. 523 00:35:31,822 --> 00:35:34,822 Sometimes age has its compensations. 524 00:35:35,423 --> 00:35:37,223 I wouldn't go that far. 525 00:35:38,523 --> 00:35:40,322 It's been a while since I've felt this good. 526 00:35:40,352 --> 00:35:41,323 Don't spoil it. 527 00:35:42,623 --> 00:35:44,624 - How long? - Too long. 528 00:35:45,321 --> 00:35:46,841 You haven't been with any other women? 529 00:35:46,922 --> 00:35:48,824 - No. - You're lying. 530 00:35:49,424 --> 00:35:51,925 - I am? - Trust me. I know about these things. 531 00:35:52,696 --> 00:35:54,925 - Okay. - Okay, what? 532 00:35:55,325 --> 00:35:57,625 - I'm lying. - I don't care. 533 00:35:58,325 --> 00:35:59,326 That's a shame. 534 00:35:59,926 --> 00:36:01,125 Lying's my main thing. 535 00:36:01,155 --> 00:36:02,226 I'll miss it. 536 00:36:03,426 --> 00:36:05,026 Look, in my experience... 537 00:36:05,109 --> 00:36:07,227 - Which, we've established, is considerable. - Yes. 538 00:36:07,287 --> 00:36:09,627 - Men lie about everything. - But women don't. 539 00:36:10,003 --> 00:36:12,243 I don't know about "women," but I don't. 540 00:36:14,208 --> 00:36:16,028 - But from me you expect it. - Absolutely. 541 00:36:17,908 --> 00:36:20,927 When you expect the worse from people, 542 00:36:21,027 --> 00:36:23,028 they usually deliver. 543 00:36:23,078 --> 00:36:24,908 Are you always this aggressive after sex? 544 00:36:25,028 --> 00:36:26,328 You call this aggressive? 545 00:36:30,149 --> 00:36:32,909 Oh, Yeah. Hey, this is fun. 546 00:36:33,829 --> 00:36:35,229 Can we do it again next Friday? 547 00:36:35,976 --> 00:36:37,209 You don't waste time, do you? 548 00:36:37,790 --> 00:36:40,210 Life's too short. I'm sorry I got so old before I noticed. 549 00:36:40,630 --> 00:36:43,230 - I'm never growing old. - Hmm? 550 00:36:43,930 --> 00:36:45,931 But time catches up. What can you do? 551 00:36:46,231 --> 00:36:47,381 Keep moving. 552 00:37:02,933 --> 00:37:04,033 I had a really good time. 553 00:37:04,106 --> 00:37:06,541 Yeah, me too. 554 00:37:08,233 --> 00:37:10,334 Kiss me, Joe. Please, kiss me. 555 00:37:13,834 --> 00:37:16,034 - Well, good night. - Good night. 556 00:37:20,075 --> 00:37:21,534 - Bye. - Bye. 557 00:37:57,167 --> 00:37:58,339 How was your date? 558 00:37:59,670 --> 00:38:02,339 Uh... Fine. We had a good time. 559 00:38:03,007 --> 00:38:04,220 Great. So did we. 560 00:38:05,210 --> 00:38:06,920 I hate when she does that. 561 00:38:07,612 --> 00:38:09,740 She's trying to break the world record. 562 00:38:09,800 --> 00:38:10,771 I can't look. 563 00:38:10,801 --> 00:38:13,041 If she's not up in ten seconds, call an ambulance. 564 00:38:14,141 --> 00:38:15,621 So, when are you gonna see him again? 565 00:38:15,981 --> 00:38:17,221 I don't know. 566 00:38:18,241 --> 00:38:20,342 Well, If I were you, Charlotte, I'd go easy. 567 00:38:20,922 --> 00:38:22,991 I mean I know you're planning a celibate life, 568 00:38:23,021 --> 00:38:24,361 but with half my chromosomes, 569 00:38:24,391 --> 00:38:25,681 I think that might be tough. 570 00:38:27,802 --> 00:38:29,622 Yuck, five seconds off. 571 00:38:49,044 --> 00:38:51,405 I must stop having impure thoughts about Joe. 572 00:38:51,845 --> 00:38:53,845 I don't take the bus to school anymore. 573 00:38:53,945 --> 00:38:55,405 That doesn't seem to help. 574 00:38:56,045 --> 00:38:57,924 Maybe if I can figure out why I love him, 575 00:38:57,954 --> 00:38:59,546 the sick feeling will go away. 576 00:38:59,837 --> 00:39:00,895 I love him. 577 00:39:01,038 --> 00:39:03,097 He has the most beautiful skin in captivity. 578 00:39:03,240 --> 00:39:05,645 I love him because he wears moccasins in the Winter, 579 00:39:05,675 --> 00:39:08,839 even though his feet must feel like blocks of ice. 580 00:39:18,748 --> 00:39:22,049 - Trick or treat! - Trick or treat! 581 00:39:22,249 --> 00:39:23,220 Okay, I'm coming! 582 00:39:23,250 --> 00:39:24,848 - Anything for Halloween? - Yes. 583 00:39:24,878 --> 00:39:26,648 I've got wonderful prizes for you! 584 00:39:27,648 --> 00:39:28,748 Toothpaste? 585 00:39:28,948 --> 00:39:29,988 - Toothpaste! - All right. 586 00:39:31,949 --> 00:39:34,099 All right, it's magic toothpaste. 587 00:39:34,199 --> 00:39:35,949 - Mom... - It's magic toothpaste. 588 00:39:36,007 --> 00:39:37,650 Bye. Hey, hey, wait, wait! 589 00:39:37,750 --> 00:39:39,930 Miss Kate, in the house. 590 00:39:40,690 --> 00:39:41,630 Come on, Mom. 591 00:39:41,660 --> 00:39:43,450 Put your goldfish lips in the house. 592 00:39:43,550 --> 00:39:44,650 Bye. 593 00:39:46,051 --> 00:39:48,931 - Okay. - Come on, let's do it. 594 00:39:49,121 --> 00:39:52,121 Let's go, girls. Come on. Be Winner. 595 00:39:52,526 --> 00:39:55,328 - They're big. - I know, I know. 596 00:39:58,252 --> 00:40:00,813 Okay. All right, team! Yeah! 597 00:40:04,753 --> 00:40:06,253 Come on. Good. 598 00:40:06,511 --> 00:40:09,003 Let's go, girls. Keep good. 599 00:40:09,054 --> 00:40:10,814 Swimmers' meet! Quiet, please! 600 00:40:12,554 --> 00:40:13,754 Swimmers, on the block. 601 00:40:16,254 --> 00:40:17,255 Take your marks. 602 00:40:24,556 --> 00:40:25,656 A regular Esther Williams. 603 00:40:25,756 --> 00:40:27,367 - What do I have? - Mrs. Flax? 604 00:40:27,816 --> 00:40:29,655 Mrs. Flax? Coach Parker. 605 00:40:29,755 --> 00:40:31,935 So nice to meet you. Hi, Lou. 606 00:40:32,056 --> 00:40:34,656 I don't have to tell you how proud we are of Kate. 607 00:40:34,742 --> 00:40:36,972 You know, I think she has Olympic potential. 608 00:40:37,111 --> 00:40:39,356 - But I guess that doesn't surprise you. - Not at all. 609 00:40:39,556 --> 00:40:41,479 - Does she get it from you? - Not at all. 610 00:40:41,616 --> 00:40:43,857 - Nice job, dear. - Thanks, coach. 611 00:40:45,457 --> 00:40:46,657 Hi, Mrs. Crain. 612 00:40:47,257 --> 00:40:49,018 - Bye, coach. - Bye, dear. 613 00:40:52,008 --> 00:40:53,008 Lou, I don't know what to say. 614 00:40:53,038 --> 00:40:54,258 They're terrible. 615 00:40:54,458 --> 00:40:57,329 Hey, I said painting was my passion. 616 00:40:57,359 --> 00:40:59,099 I didn't say I was good, you know. 617 00:40:59,359 --> 00:41:01,319 Hey, girls, you got back me up here. 618 00:41:02,099 --> 00:41:04,819 Did either of you ever once hear me say to your mother... 619 00:41:04,849 --> 00:41:05,873 that I had talent? 620 00:41:05,960 --> 00:41:06,960 - No. - No. 621 00:41:07,010 --> 00:41:09,010 I rest my case. Okay? 622 00:41:10,648 --> 00:41:13,941 Now, will you stop being a pain-in-the-ass critic... 623 00:41:14,011 --> 00:41:15,331 and pose for me? 624 00:41:15,361 --> 00:41:17,240 Yes, but if you make me look like that, you're a dead man. 625 00:41:17,270 --> 00:41:19,062 - Trust me. - Right. 626 00:41:19,262 --> 00:41:21,162 Girls, follow me. 627 00:41:21,728 --> 00:41:23,162 Already I feel inspired. 628 00:41:26,062 --> 00:41:28,703 I'll show you where you're sleeping. Ladies? 629 00:41:37,263 --> 00:41:37,933 Okay? 630 00:41:37,963 --> 00:41:38,963 - Yeah. - Yeah. 631 00:41:39,113 --> 00:41:40,643 Forgive me if I don't linger, girls, 632 00:41:40,748 --> 00:41:42,824 But when the muse calls, the artist has to jump. 633 00:41:43,464 --> 00:41:44,544 - Good night. - Good night. 634 00:41:45,564 --> 00:41:47,564 - He's nutso. - Ha. 635 00:42:03,066 --> 00:42:05,466 I did Sophie from memory. 636 00:42:05,566 --> 00:42:07,827 I've never worked with a live one before. 637 00:42:07,944 --> 00:42:09,878 Huh? 638 00:42:10,107 --> 00:42:11,267 Now this is fun. 639 00:42:12,267 --> 00:42:13,668 Don't you think this is fun? 640 00:42:17,156 --> 00:42:19,248 Oh, Cleo, baby... 641 00:42:19,468 --> 00:42:22,495 That is not very regal. 642 00:43:11,574 --> 00:43:13,873 Sometimes I feel like you're the child... 643 00:43:13,903 --> 00:43:15,254 and I'm the grown-up. 644 00:43:17,890 --> 00:43:20,484 I can't ever imagine being inside you. 645 00:43:23,696 --> 00:43:26,175 I can't imagine being anywhere you'd let me hang around... 646 00:43:26,205 --> 00:43:28,176 for nine straight months. 647 00:43:51,578 --> 00:43:53,356 What's wrong with this picture? 648 00:43:53,478 --> 00:43:54,929 Compliments of Mrs. Landsky. 649 00:43:55,064 --> 00:43:57,779 It seems she's frozen Lou's meals for the next decade. 650 00:43:58,265 --> 00:43:59,265 Good morning. 651 00:43:59,309 --> 00:44:01,259 - Good morning. - Good morning. 652 00:44:01,669 --> 00:44:02,819 What a good morning. 653 00:44:02,849 --> 00:44:05,773 - This is for you. - Thank you. 654 00:44:05,840 --> 00:44:07,310 How did you sleep, Charlotte? 655 00:44:07,410 --> 00:44:08,260 Did you weather the storm? 656 00:44:08,340 --> 00:44:09,840 Yeah. Fine, thanks. 657 00:44:15,721 --> 00:44:18,261 This is how you normally eat breakfast together? 658 00:44:19,582 --> 00:44:20,092 Yeah. 659 00:44:20,122 --> 00:44:21,122 - Mm-hmm. - Mm-hmm. 660 00:44:21,282 --> 00:44:22,962 Oh. 661 00:44:33,983 --> 00:44:37,284 The time is Autumn, 1621. 662 00:44:37,584 --> 00:44:40,608 The place is Plymouth Plantation: 663 00:44:40,781 --> 00:44:43,584 An English colony in Massachusetts. 664 00:44:44,052 --> 00:44:48,584 This is a harvest feast; a thanksgiving. 665 00:44:49,458 --> 00:44:50,685 To share the harvest, 666 00:44:50,785 --> 00:44:54,165 the Englishmen have invited their friends, the Indians, 667 00:44:54,263 --> 00:44:56,128 Oh, God. 668 00:44:56,265 --> 00:44:59,136 For games and contests of skill. 669 00:44:59,286 --> 00:45:00,486 Oh, dear God. 670 00:45:03,140 --> 00:45:06,440 - What is it? Marsha? - What happened? 671 00:45:06,667 --> 00:45:09,347 - The President's been shot! - What? 672 00:45:10,447 --> 00:45:12,447 The President's been shot! 673 00:45:13,084 --> 00:45:16,486 - I can't believe that! - Benny, turn that off! 674 00:45:18,488 --> 00:45:20,488 Listen. Listen. 675 00:45:21,349 --> 00:45:24,589 Governor Connally was shot in the upper left chest. 676 00:45:24,689 --> 00:45:26,349 The first unconfirmed reports say... 677 00:45:26,449 --> 00:45:28,730 The President was hit in the head. 678 00:45:28,869 --> 00:45:30,599 That's an unconfirmed report 679 00:45:30,730 --> 00:45:32,290 that the President was hit in the head. 680 00:45:32,690 --> 00:45:34,465 The President's wife, Jackie Kennedy, was not hurt. 681 00:45:34,495 --> 00:45:38,071 She walked into the hospital at her husband's stretcher side. 682 00:45:38,213 --> 00:45:40,291 A Dallas newsman, Mel Couch, 683 00:45:40,391 --> 00:45:42,790 said he was riding behind the President in the parade. 684 00:45:42,890 --> 00:45:44,490 He said, after the shots were fired, 685 00:45:44,540 --> 00:45:46,326 he happened to look up at the fifth or sixth floor... 686 00:45:46,356 --> 00:45:48,351 of the Texas book depository. 687 00:45:48,691 --> 00:45:50,691 he said he saw the rifle being pulled back in. 688 00:45:51,391 --> 00:45:52,672 I want my father. 689 00:45:52,762 --> 00:45:53,592 Please, god, 690 00:45:53,692 --> 00:45:54,972 I want to speak to my father. 691 00:45:58,092 --> 00:46:00,092 Tell us exactly what you saw, sir. 692 00:46:00,853 --> 00:46:03,869 He was coming down the street... 693 00:46:04,008 --> 00:46:06,568 and my five-year-old boy and myself... 694 00:46:06,710 --> 00:46:08,974 were by ourselves on the grass there on Palmer street. 695 00:46:09,080 --> 00:46:11,674 I waved and the man... the man... 696 00:46:12,450 --> 00:46:14,974 It's all right, sir. You waved at him. 697 00:46:16,295 --> 00:46:18,522 As he was waving back, the shot rang out... 698 00:46:18,658 --> 00:46:20,057 and he slumped down in his seat... 699 00:46:20,193 --> 00:46:24,927 and his wife reached up toward him as he was slumping down... 700 00:46:25,065 --> 00:46:27,795 and the second shot went off and it just knocked him down. 701 00:46:27,896 --> 00:46:29,346 - Two shots? - Two shots. 702 00:46:29,436 --> 00:46:30,512 Did you see the man, who did it? 703 00:46:30,542 --> 00:46:32,677 No, sir, I did not see the man. I... 704 00:46:32,977 --> 00:46:37,444 I'm sorry I can't help you more, 705 00:46:37,612 --> 00:46:39,376 but I... I won't forget it. 706 00:46:39,498 --> 00:46:40,348 Excuse me, Jack. 707 00:46:40,448 --> 00:46:42,978 Here is a flash from the associated press, Dateline Dallas. 708 00:46:43,078 --> 00:46:45,297 Two priests who were with President Kennedy... 709 00:46:45,397 --> 00:46:47,858 say he is dead of bullet wounds. 710 00:46:48,457 --> 00:46:50,358 There is no further confirmation, 711 00:46:50,458 --> 00:46:54,189 but this is what we have on a flash basis from the associated press. 712 00:46:55,298 --> 00:46:57,425 The pair of men have just administered... 713 00:46:57,567 --> 00:47:00,399 the last rites of the catholic church to President Kennedy. 714 00:47:00,799 --> 00:47:04,000 President Kennedy has been assassinated. 715 00:47:04,100 --> 00:47:07,800 It's official now. The President is dead. 716 00:47:08,112 --> 00:47:11,014 Women here in shock; some have fainted. 717 00:47:11,149 --> 00:47:13,981 Two secret service men standing by the emergency room, 718 00:47:14,361 --> 00:47:17,180 tears streaming down their face. 719 00:47:17,322 --> 00:47:20,862 There's only one word to describe the picture here, 720 00:47:20,982 --> 00:47:23,402 and that's grief, and much of it. 721 00:47:24,142 --> 00:47:25,982 As of just a few moments ago, 722 00:47:26,142 --> 00:47:29,703 the President of the United States is dead. 723 00:47:33,274 --> 00:47:35,804 It feels like there isn't a single adult left... 724 00:47:35,904 --> 00:47:37,804 on the entire planet. 725 00:47:43,419 --> 00:47:45,943 Oh, God, what were you doing? 726 00:47:46,121 --> 00:47:47,984 How could you let this happen? 727 00:47:53,863 --> 00:47:55,365 I miss my father. 728 00:47:56,332 --> 00:47:58,686 I wonder if he's watching television. 729 00:47:59,306 --> 00:48:01,006 Maybe he's in the jungles of Brazil... 730 00:48:01,106 --> 00:48:02,686 and doesn't even know what's happened. 731 00:48:41,216 --> 00:48:44,512 The old man who did this job before me... 732 00:48:45,872 --> 00:48:47,412 He had Indian ways. 733 00:48:49,811 --> 00:48:51,811 He could stand so quiet, 734 00:48:52,762 --> 00:48:55,612 his heels together, like a little dancer. 735 00:49:00,270 --> 00:49:02,113 The world's gone crazy. 736 00:49:02,170 --> 00:49:06,107 I know. I know. 737 00:49:07,213 --> 00:49:08,374 I know. 738 00:49:59,019 --> 00:50:01,039 Our Father, who art in Heaven, hallowed be thy name. 739 00:50:01,069 --> 00:50:01,879 Thy kingdom come, 740 00:50:01,909 --> 00:50:03,644 thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven. 741 00:50:03,674 --> 00:50:04,620 Give us this day our daily bread... 742 00:50:04,650 --> 00:50:06,200 and forgive us our trespasses, 743 00:50:06,300 --> 00:50:07,553 as we forgive those who trespass against us. 744 00:50:07,583 --> 00:50:09,140 And lead us not into temptation, 745 00:50:09,240 --> 00:50:10,761 but deliver us from evil. Amen. 746 00:50:11,450 --> 00:50:13,384 In 1990, 747 00:50:13,518 --> 00:50:17,010 the Age of Space will be entering its second phase, 748 00:50:17,189 --> 00:50:20,318 and our hopes in it to preserve the peace, 749 00:50:20,760 --> 00:50:23,752 to make sure that in this great new sea, 750 00:50:23,930 --> 00:50:25,454 as on earth, 751 00:50:25,631 --> 00:50:28,328 The United States is second to none. 752 00:50:35,009 --> 00:50:37,034 Everyone's crying about the President. 753 00:50:37,178 --> 00:50:39,305 I've turned into a fallen woman overnight, 754 00:50:39,404 --> 00:50:40,404 and no one can tell. 755 00:50:40,448 --> 00:50:42,474 I've been as bad as I can be. 756 00:50:42,618 --> 00:50:44,415 I should be burned at the stake. 757 00:50:50,760 --> 00:50:52,826 Bless me, Father, for I have sinned, 758 00:50:52,963 --> 00:50:54,825 and in a holy place. 759 00:50:54,964 --> 00:50:55,964 I kissed him. 760 00:50:56,665 --> 00:50:57,926 I will starve myself... 761 00:50:58,026 --> 00:51:01,026 until I purge every sinful thought about Joe Peretti from my soul. 762 00:51:11,927 --> 00:51:14,544 the sins of the saints never go unpunished. 763 00:51:14,628 --> 00:51:16,928 Joan of Arc got burned at the stake. 764 00:51:17,028 --> 00:51:19,088 Okay, so what are you going to do to me, Lord? 765 00:51:19,625 --> 00:51:22,129 Flagellation? Mutilation? 766 00:51:22,795 --> 00:51:25,059 I bumped into Mr. Crain on the way, 767 00:51:25,165 --> 00:51:26,429 leaving Sammy's house. 768 00:51:26,729 --> 00:51:27,969 - That old witch woman? - Yeah. 769 00:51:28,029 --> 00:51:29,080 Charlotte, dinner. 770 00:51:29,236 --> 00:51:30,890 Well, you think about it, get back to me. 771 00:51:31,372 --> 00:51:32,710 He's wanted a baby real bad. 772 00:51:34,375 --> 00:51:36,391 I guess he's trying one of her love potions. 773 00:51:36,711 --> 00:51:38,171 Wish I had trouble conceiving. 774 00:51:38,531 --> 00:51:41,446 I can get pregnant if I hang my clothes next to a man's suit. 775 00:51:41,631 --> 00:51:44,115 Oh, Lord, no. Anything but that. 776 00:51:54,565 --> 00:51:57,172 No more fasting. You're driving me crazy. 777 00:51:57,432 --> 00:51:59,799 I'm pregnant. Lord, how could you do this to me? 778 00:52:00,304 --> 00:52:02,313 - How could you be so strict? - Are you okay? 779 00:52:03,874 --> 00:52:06,502 All right, eat and get some rest, 780 00:52:06,677 --> 00:52:08,684 and we'll just talk about this tomorrow. 781 00:52:13,534 --> 00:52:15,355 Mary didn't even kiss Joseph... 782 00:52:15,385 --> 00:52:16,635 and look what happened to her. 783 00:52:17,335 --> 00:52:19,135 Oh, Lord, what have I done? 784 00:52:32,373 --> 00:52:33,697 Can I talk to you? 785 00:52:33,727 --> 00:52:35,017 Sure. 786 00:52:41,738 --> 00:52:42,738 Well? 787 00:52:53,039 --> 00:52:54,039 Hello? 788 00:52:55,040 --> 00:52:56,320 Is anybody there? 789 00:52:57,201 --> 00:52:59,439 Just give me a second. I'm trying, Mom. 790 00:52:59,736 --> 00:53:01,899 - What? - I want to tell you. 791 00:53:02,019 --> 00:53:02,840 What? 792 00:53:02,940 --> 00:53:05,390 I may be pregnant with the next Jewish-Italian Messiah. 793 00:53:05,490 --> 00:53:07,020 - What? - Nothing. 794 00:53:09,146 --> 00:53:11,186 Charlotte, what in the hell is the matter with you? 795 00:53:11,483 --> 00:53:14,501 What is happening in your brain when you just sit there, 796 00:53:14,641 --> 00:53:16,241 not moving, not speaking? 797 00:53:16,401 --> 00:53:17,401 What? 798 00:53:19,642 --> 00:53:21,042 What? What? 799 00:53:24,842 --> 00:53:26,902 Dad, you're the only person who can help, 800 00:53:26,932 --> 00:53:28,343 and you're never here. 801 00:53:28,743 --> 00:53:29,843 Where are you? 802 00:53:55,446 --> 00:53:56,571 Joe doesn't know where she is. 803 00:53:56,601 --> 00:53:57,907 We better get back. 804 00:53:58,327 --> 00:53:59,697 So, she's angry, that's okay. 805 00:53:59,797 --> 00:54:01,117 Blowing off steam... that's okay. 806 00:54:01,196 --> 00:54:03,096 But taking my car... that's not okay. 807 00:54:03,146 --> 00:54:04,847 That's going way too far. 808 00:54:05,347 --> 00:54:07,847 Did she ever talk to you about anything bothering her? 809 00:54:07,947 --> 00:54:09,027 Lou, I'm her mother. 810 00:54:09,113 --> 00:54:10,246 If something bothers her, 811 00:54:10,276 --> 00:54:12,547 I'm the last person she's gonna talk to. 812 00:54:13,548 --> 00:54:14,647 She's a teenager, for Christ's sake. 813 00:54:14,677 --> 00:54:16,448 I'm amazed she talks at all. 814 00:54:17,356 --> 00:54:19,017 Where in the hell can she be? 815 00:54:19,188 --> 00:54:22,249 ♪ Onward Christian soldiers ♪ 816 00:54:22,909 --> 00:54:26,428 I want to lead a violent and exciting life! 817 00:55:33,457 --> 00:55:35,457 Excuse me, sir. I was out for a spin, 818 00:55:35,557 --> 00:55:37,157 and I seem to be having engine trouble. 819 00:55:37,957 --> 00:55:40,117 - Who is it? - It's all right. It's just a young girl. 820 00:55:41,558 --> 00:55:43,758 I'm a shepherd who has lost my flock. 821 00:55:44,658 --> 00:55:46,629 Your folks know where you are? 822 00:55:46,659 --> 00:55:48,509 Oh, yeah, they know exactly where I am. 823 00:55:48,539 --> 00:55:51,059 Especially my dad. He's that kind of guy. 824 00:55:52,959 --> 00:55:55,420 Charlotte, you're talking like a crazy person. 825 00:55:56,900 --> 00:55:58,360 Lou, I'm glad that you're here, 826 00:55:58,460 --> 00:56:00,040 but I don't need you to stay. 827 00:56:00,420 --> 00:56:01,800 I'll always be here for you. 828 00:56:02,661 --> 00:56:04,561 Okay, I won't always be here for you. 829 00:56:04,661 --> 00:56:05,661 Just sometimes, 830 00:56:06,160 --> 00:56:08,385 if I feel like it or I happen to be in the neighborhood. 831 00:56:08,415 --> 00:56:09,410 Is that better? 832 00:56:09,510 --> 00:56:11,350 I know she's doing this to turn my hair white. 833 00:56:11,416 --> 00:56:13,741 She's doing this because she has a problem, 834 00:56:13,841 --> 00:56:15,840 and she's probably too frightened to talk to you. 835 00:56:15,870 --> 00:56:17,361 Why would she be frightened? 836 00:56:17,461 --> 00:56:20,522 Rachel, you can be a little abrasive! 837 00:56:20,622 --> 00:56:23,208 Shit, even I'm scared to talk to you sometimes. 838 00:56:23,462 --> 00:56:26,203 She's a kid! Lighten up! Don't ride her too hard! 839 00:56:26,283 --> 00:56:28,363 I don't need a lecture on parenting from you! 840 00:56:28,663 --> 00:56:30,663 Okay, that's it. When she comes, I'm leaving. 841 00:56:30,763 --> 00:56:32,803 And you wonder why she runs away from problems? 842 00:56:32,903 --> 00:56:34,164 Will you listen to yourself? 843 00:56:34,242 --> 00:56:35,524 - Are we having a fight? - Yeah! 844 00:56:35,610 --> 00:56:37,364 - Why? - It relieves the tension! 845 00:56:37,445 --> 00:56:38,445 Yeah? 846 00:56:38,910 --> 00:56:41,035 Well... 847 00:56:41,065 --> 00:56:43,065 The Discotheques, which are nightclubs, 848 00:56:43,165 --> 00:56:44,935 have been very well-known... 849 00:56:44,965 --> 00:56:47,465 and popular now for years in Europe and South America. 850 00:56:47,495 --> 00:56:49,890 Paris, for example, has about 100 of them. 851 00:56:50,026 --> 00:56:51,566 You're look at the Frug, 852 00:56:51,666 --> 00:56:54,346 a combination twist, Patty-Cake and Hitchhike. 853 00:56:54,666 --> 00:56:55,346 That's Killer Joe, 854 00:56:55,465 --> 00:56:56,947 society's favorite dancing teacher. 855 00:56:57,047 --> 00:57:01,233 Killer Joe is also available, he told us, as a party stimulator. 856 00:57:11,549 --> 00:57:13,415 - You like pancakes? - Yeah. 857 00:57:14,808 --> 00:57:15,928 - Here you are. - Thank you. 858 00:57:17,968 --> 00:57:19,528 A real, live father... 859 00:57:19,628 --> 00:57:22,349 living in the same house as his wife and kids. 860 00:57:22,862 --> 00:57:24,749 They're perfect. This is like television. 861 00:57:25,729 --> 00:57:26,729 Thanks. 862 00:57:27,669 --> 00:57:28,930 Maybe they'll adopt me. 863 00:57:31,570 --> 00:57:32,670 Do you like bacon? 864 00:57:32,770 --> 00:57:34,770 Oh, yeah. 865 00:57:35,971 --> 00:57:37,071 - How about sausage? - Mmm. 866 00:57:40,715 --> 00:57:44,342 - Toast? - I love toast. 867 00:57:44,372 --> 00:57:45,372 Thanks. 868 00:57:45,772 --> 00:57:47,572 - What's your name? - Sal. 869 00:57:48,072 --> 00:57:50,422 How could you lie to them? They're being so nice to you. 870 00:57:51,473 --> 00:57:52,573 Sal what, dear? 871 00:57:53,373 --> 00:57:54,973 Val. Sal Val. 872 00:57:56,053 --> 00:57:57,053 Uh-oh. 873 00:57:57,153 --> 00:57:59,073 My parents, they love rhymes. 874 00:57:59,173 --> 00:58:01,413 We stay up late every night trying to think of new ones. 875 00:58:01,574 --> 00:58:04,074 Me, Mom, Dad, Sis and my big brother... 876 00:58:04,624 --> 00:58:05,724 Al. 877 00:58:19,435 --> 00:58:20,475 Hello? 878 00:58:21,075 --> 00:58:22,082 Yeah. 879 00:58:23,726 --> 00:58:26,356 She's all right. She's in New Haven. 880 00:58:27,676 --> 00:58:29,676 Could you give me that address again, please? 881 00:58:30,877 --> 00:58:32,567 When I was little, we lived in Brazil... 882 00:58:32,667 --> 00:58:34,437 and we owned this big diamond mine. 883 00:58:34,537 --> 00:58:37,057 My father would dance with me all the time. 884 00:58:37,144 --> 00:58:39,377 We would just dance and dance and dance... 885 00:58:39,407 --> 00:58:41,312 right in the middle of the jungle. 886 00:58:41,578 --> 00:58:42,549 Me and my sister... 887 00:58:42,579 --> 00:58:45,537 she has these beautiful, long red curls, and she likes to... 888 00:58:45,567 --> 00:58:48,379 - wear this jeweled crown thing on her head. - Excuse me. 889 00:58:49,091 --> 00:58:52,219 We would make this pear wine. 890 00:58:52,359 --> 00:58:55,580 We would take the bottles and hang them from branches... 891 00:58:55,680 --> 00:58:58,361 and write on them with diamond dust. 892 00:58:58,480 --> 00:58:59,480 Charlotte? 893 00:59:12,982 --> 00:59:13,581 Bye. 894 00:59:13,681 --> 00:59:15,481 - Bye, dear. - Bye. 895 00:59:15,581 --> 00:59:16,881 Bye, Val. 896 00:59:17,382 --> 00:59:19,482 - Bye. - Bye. 897 00:59:19,532 --> 00:59:20,582 Bye, dear. 898 01:00:12,069 --> 01:00:14,789 Do you have the slightest idea what you've just put me through? 899 01:00:16,755 --> 01:00:18,768 I thought you were kidnapped. 900 01:00:18,854 --> 01:00:20,789 I thought you were dead. 901 01:00:20,949 --> 01:00:22,948 I thought you were laying by the road someplace, 902 01:00:22,978 --> 01:00:24,229 chopped into a million pieces. 903 01:00:24,289 --> 01:00:24,949 Go to your room! 904 01:00:25,049 --> 01:00:25,929 I can't talk to you right now. 905 01:00:26,029 --> 01:00:28,770 If I talk to you right now, I'll kill you. 906 01:00:38,813 --> 01:00:39,891 Okay. 907 01:00:42,416 --> 01:00:43,992 I've had a little scotch. 908 01:00:44,050 --> 01:00:45,952 I'm real calm. 909 01:00:47,452 --> 01:00:49,414 So, tell me, Charlotte... 910 01:00:50,192 --> 01:00:51,193 What's going on? 911 01:00:52,295 --> 01:00:53,713 You don't get it, Mom. 912 01:00:53,743 --> 01:00:55,593 I think I'm pregnant. 913 01:00:55,665 --> 01:00:57,073 It may be the Lord's child. 914 01:00:57,373 --> 01:00:58,653 Are you trying to make me crazy? 915 01:00:58,733 --> 01:00:59,954 You wouldn't understand. 916 01:01:00,437 --> 01:01:03,274 You don't believe in religion. You don't believe in anything. 917 01:01:03,374 --> 01:01:04,694 Why were you running? 918 01:01:05,194 --> 01:01:06,835 Running away doesn't solve anything. 919 01:01:07,995 --> 01:01:09,995 I'm a grown-up. I don't run away. 920 01:01:10,095 --> 01:01:11,195 I move on. 921 01:01:11,395 --> 01:01:12,894 Look, if something is bothering you, 922 01:01:12,924 --> 01:01:14,645 tell me what it is. Maybe I can help you. 923 01:01:14,675 --> 01:01:16,246 How bad can it be? 924 01:01:18,795 --> 01:01:22,496 Look, I'm really tired. I just want to go to sleep, okay? 925 01:01:30,597 --> 01:01:32,077 Let me tell you something, Charlotte. 926 01:01:32,557 --> 01:01:34,957 Sometimes being the mother really stinks. 927 01:01:35,077 --> 01:01:37,173 I don't always know what I'm doing. 928 01:01:37,297 --> 01:01:40,998 It's not like you and your sister came with a book of instructions. 929 01:01:41,174 --> 01:01:43,498 If I can help you, tell me. 930 01:01:44,898 --> 01:01:45,998 I'll give it my best shot, 931 01:01:46,028 --> 01:01:49,699 but that's all I can do. 932 01:02:04,008 --> 01:02:05,081 Where's Charlotte? 933 01:02:05,177 --> 01:02:07,401 She's in her room, somewhere in mars. 934 01:02:08,001 --> 01:02:09,902 - What did she tell you? - Nothing. 935 01:02:11,250 --> 01:02:12,410 Maybe her school counselor... 936 01:02:12,551 --> 01:02:14,644 What? Mrs. Crain? Are you kidding me? 937 01:02:14,786 --> 01:02:16,842 That woman couldn't find her ass with both hands. 938 01:02:17,757 --> 01:02:20,083 Has she ever done anything this strange before? 939 01:02:20,403 --> 01:02:23,502 She did get sent home from school one time before... 940 01:02:23,602 --> 01:02:26,030 for licking chalk off a blackboard. 941 01:02:26,165 --> 01:02:28,083 God, her tongue was yellow for a week. 942 01:02:28,603 --> 01:02:29,843 What did she do that for? 943 01:02:29,936 --> 01:02:31,782 I don't know. She read in some book... 944 01:02:31,812 --> 01:02:34,204 that some saint had a vision after licking a wall. 945 01:02:36,504 --> 01:02:38,503 - Mm-hmm. - The teacher sent home a note that said... 946 01:02:38,533 --> 01:02:41,405 she thought charlotte had psychological problems. 947 01:02:41,845 --> 01:02:43,605 - What did you do? - We moved. 948 01:02:44,105 --> 01:02:45,105 Oh. 949 01:03:00,107 --> 01:03:01,707 - Hi. - Hi. 950 01:03:04,708 --> 01:03:07,408 I heard you ran away. You okay? 951 01:03:07,848 --> 01:03:08,848 Yeah. 952 01:03:11,088 --> 01:03:12,409 You want to talk about it? 953 01:03:14,389 --> 01:03:16,469 It's kind of complicated. 954 01:03:18,390 --> 01:03:19,390 Okay. 955 01:03:20,593 --> 01:03:21,710 I was worried. 956 01:03:29,202 --> 01:03:31,810 Joe, tell me about your girlfriend. 957 01:03:33,139 --> 01:03:34,163 My girlfriend? 958 01:03:36,477 --> 01:03:37,791 There's nothing to tell. 959 01:03:39,280 --> 01:03:40,391 Did you love her? 960 01:03:41,515 --> 01:03:43,392 Yes, I did. 961 01:03:44,312 --> 01:03:45,512 But her family moved away, 962 01:03:45,612 --> 01:03:48,122 and I never got a chance to see her again. 963 01:03:50,212 --> 01:03:52,713 People in town talk as if something happened between us, 964 01:03:52,895 --> 01:03:55,393 but it didn't. 965 01:04:00,437 --> 01:04:02,614 Joe, do you like babies? 966 01:04:02,974 --> 01:04:04,094 "Babies"? 967 01:04:04,794 --> 01:04:07,095 Sure. I love babies. 968 01:04:07,615 --> 01:04:10,115 Someday I hope to have a whole bunch of them. 969 01:04:22,797 --> 01:04:24,797 Joan Ark? 970 01:04:32,817 --> 01:04:34,267 Hello. I'm Dr. Reynolds. 971 01:04:34,397 --> 01:04:36,168 How do you do? You know, Actually, I just... - 972 01:04:36,198 --> 01:04:36,977 First time here? 973 01:04:37,144 --> 01:04:39,478 - Yeah, I just had a question. - How's school? 974 01:04:40,048 --> 01:04:42,858 It's great. I wish we had it on weekends. 975 01:04:45,619 --> 01:04:46,849 How old are you, Joan? 976 01:04:46,955 --> 01:04:48,979 What? Uh... 18. 977 01:04:50,325 --> 01:04:51,619 Is everything okay? 978 01:04:51,819 --> 01:04:53,570 Is there anything inside me? 979 01:04:55,720 --> 01:04:58,100 Just get dressed and come into my office. 980 01:04:58,666 --> 01:05:01,001 Well, uh... 981 01:05:13,251 --> 01:05:14,251 Joan, 982 01:05:14,953 --> 01:05:17,863 has your mother ever talked to you about sex? 983 01:05:18,157 --> 01:05:19,723 Please, God, I want to die. 984 01:05:21,483 --> 01:05:23,403 Yeah, all the time. 985 01:05:24,023 --> 01:05:26,524 So you know how babies are conceived? 986 01:05:29,302 --> 01:05:30,302 Oh, yeah. 987 01:05:31,304 --> 01:05:33,804 We talk about everything. She's a wonderful mother. 988 01:05:35,724 --> 01:05:38,124 Then why did you think you were pregnant? 989 01:05:38,224 --> 01:05:39,484 You're still a virgin. 990 01:05:42,450 --> 01:05:44,865 I want to die now, right now. 991 01:05:50,346 --> 01:05:53,486 Okay, so it's crazy to think one kiss could get you pregnant, 992 01:05:53,626 --> 01:05:54,826 But how would I know? 993 01:05:55,226 --> 01:05:56,527 What about the Virgin Mary? 994 01:05:56,627 --> 01:05:58,107 And look at St. Perpetua. 995 01:05:58,227 --> 01:06:00,986 She got transformed into a man and then fought with the devil... 996 01:06:01,016 --> 01:06:03,728 and walked on his head. Weird things happen. 997 01:06:06,028 --> 01:06:06,628 Hi. 998 01:06:06,728 --> 01:06:07,868 - Hi. - Hi. 999 01:06:08,988 --> 01:06:09,988 How are you? 1000 01:06:10,348 --> 01:06:11,869 Can you do me a favor? 1001 01:06:12,117 --> 01:06:14,642 I need to go to Boston on this jerk errand for my boss. 1002 01:06:14,786 --> 01:06:16,529 Could you give the girls dinner? 1003 01:06:17,109 --> 01:06:19,890 Yes! I got a great pot roast in the freezer... 1004 01:06:19,990 --> 01:06:21,830 that Sophia left. Sound good? 1005 01:06:21,990 --> 01:06:23,130 Anything that's hot... 1006 01:06:23,180 --> 01:06:25,290 and not shaped like a star sounds good to me. 1007 01:06:25,398 --> 01:06:27,100 Very funny. You know what? 1008 01:06:27,201 --> 01:06:29,110 Your mouth is starting to sound like your sister's, 1009 01:06:29,140 --> 01:06:30,811 and I'm not pleased. 1010 01:06:31,171 --> 01:06:33,799 The Crain's are having a party for New Year. 1011 01:06:33,940 --> 01:06:35,465 - Did you get an invitation? - Mm-hmm. 1012 01:06:35,591 --> 01:06:37,873 I'm going. Will you be there? 1013 01:06:37,991 --> 01:06:39,801 Lou, it's a goddamn costume party. 1014 01:06:39,831 --> 01:06:40,731 What do you think? 1015 01:06:40,811 --> 01:06:41,811 Go. 1016 01:06:41,931 --> 01:06:43,112 As what? 1017 01:06:43,432 --> 01:06:44,632 A goldfish. 1018 01:06:45,632 --> 01:06:46,732 You're a big help. 1019 01:06:50,693 --> 01:06:51,813 Charlotte? 1020 01:06:53,229 --> 01:06:55,493 As always, it was a pleasure. 1021 01:07:45,787 --> 01:07:48,439 - Where is everybody? - In here! 1022 01:07:48,991 --> 01:07:51,119 Where's here? What is here? 1023 01:07:53,329 --> 01:07:54,889 Hey, you guys, what's going on in here? 1024 01:07:55,640 --> 01:07:57,140 My young friend, Esther Williams, 1025 01:07:57,240 --> 01:08:00,240 wanted to know what it would feel like to sleep at the bottom of the ocean. 1026 01:08:00,270 --> 01:08:02,001 Her wish being my command, 1027 01:08:02,101 --> 01:08:03,021 presto! 1028 01:08:03,121 --> 01:08:04,421 Wall-to-wall ocean. 1029 01:08:04,875 --> 01:08:07,001 You're certifiable. You know that, don't you? 1030 01:08:07,441 --> 01:08:08,412 If that's true, 1031 01:08:08,442 --> 01:08:10,322 I'm hanging around with the right family. 1032 01:08:10,422 --> 01:08:11,422 - Let's show her. - Yeah. 1033 01:08:13,742 --> 01:08:15,122 - You want to do it? - Yeah. 1034 01:08:17,690 --> 01:08:19,883 Oh, my gosh. 1035 01:08:20,860 --> 01:08:22,443 Oh, that is so neat. 1036 01:08:22,543 --> 01:08:24,043 It's beautiful. 1037 01:08:25,465 --> 01:08:27,345 How's that? Sitting on the bottom of the ocean. 1038 01:08:27,401 --> 01:08:29,024 - Flying fish and everything. - Yeah. 1039 01:08:29,124 --> 01:08:31,898 - Wow. - It's good.- 1040 01:08:34,175 --> 01:08:35,472 - Dinner! - Dinner! 1041 01:08:35,885 --> 01:08:37,704 Let's eat. I'm so hungry. 1042 01:08:56,547 --> 01:08:58,126 You did all of that in one evening... 1043 01:08:58,156 --> 01:08:59,297 and managed to cook dinner? 1044 01:08:59,397 --> 01:09:01,247 Charlotte we have to thank for the dinner. 1045 01:09:02,547 --> 01:09:05,008 A feast to put Sophia to shame. 1046 01:09:05,048 --> 01:09:06,508 Where did you learn how to do this? 1047 01:09:06,608 --> 01:09:08,008 Home Economics. 1048 01:09:09,188 --> 01:09:11,329 If the way to a man's heart is through his stomach, 1049 01:09:11,429 --> 01:09:13,449 I guess there's hope for you yet, Charlotte. 1050 01:09:13,749 --> 01:09:15,549 Personally, I've never found that to be true. 1051 01:09:15,849 --> 01:09:17,649 - Mom. - Yeah? 1052 01:09:18,049 --> 01:09:20,830 - What do men care about? - Astroturf. 1053 01:09:21,150 --> 01:09:22,250 According to Lou, 1054 01:09:22,350 --> 01:09:23,429 it's going to ruin baseball, 1055 01:09:23,459 --> 01:09:25,830 not to mention the whole civilized world we know it. 1056 01:09:26,010 --> 01:09:27,406 So if you ever want to have a boyfriend, 1057 01:09:27,436 --> 01:09:29,031 I suggest you start caring about it too. 1058 01:09:30,304 --> 01:09:31,731 - Mom? - Yeah? 1059 01:09:31,831 --> 01:09:32,871 Why don't you marry Lou... 1060 01:09:32,951 --> 01:09:34,031 so he can be our Dad? 1061 01:09:34,131 --> 01:09:35,352 We already have one, Katie. 1062 01:09:35,402 --> 01:09:36,542 Well, I've never seen him, 1063 01:09:36,642 --> 01:09:38,611 and he wouldn't make me an ocean. 1064 01:09:38,812 --> 01:09:40,011 - Can we sleep over? - No. 1065 01:09:40,151 --> 01:09:41,214 - Please? - No! 1066 01:09:41,311 --> 01:09:43,092 - Please? - All right, I'll think about it. 1067 01:09:49,852 --> 01:09:51,268 Actually, you're supposed to have two forks. 1068 01:09:51,298 --> 01:09:52,513 Why do you need two? 1069 01:09:52,613 --> 01:09:55,613 You know what we did if we used the wrong fork or spoon when I was a kid? 1070 01:09:55,713 --> 01:09:56,313 What? 1071 01:09:56,353 --> 01:09:58,561 We had to go stick them in the ground, 1072 01:09:58,654 --> 01:10:00,670 even if the ground was frozen solid. 1073 01:10:00,804 --> 01:10:03,134 We used to call it the hardware garden. 1074 01:10:03,234 --> 01:10:04,974 - Can you believe that? - That's nothing. 1075 01:10:05,075 --> 01:10:06,530 A kid in school had an uncle who died... 1076 01:10:06,560 --> 01:10:08,755 and got burnt up and sprinkled in a garden. 1077 01:10:08,855 --> 01:10:09,855 That's nothing. 1078 01:10:09,981 --> 01:10:12,134 St. Margaret of Antioch, she lived as a shepherdess... 1079 01:10:12,164 --> 01:10:14,436 and she got eaten by this dragon, and it burst. 1080 01:10:14,616 --> 01:10:16,331 When I die, I want to be sprinkled in the ocean. 1081 01:10:16,361 --> 01:10:18,296 I don't care if a whale eats me. 1082 01:10:18,390 --> 01:10:20,256 I can live inside a whale like Jonah, 1083 01:10:20,359 --> 01:10:21,679 - with the Angel Guard. - Girls... 1084 01:10:21,795 --> 01:10:24,257 What if you got a whale doesn't had a living room inside... 1085 01:10:24,357 --> 01:10:26,437 and you end up in someone's tuna fish sandwich? 1086 01:10:26,499 --> 01:10:27,659 Who are these people? 1087 01:10:27,801 --> 01:10:29,993 Once a man came to dinner and took his shirt off at the table... 1088 01:10:30,023 --> 01:10:31,798 like we were running a nudist colony. 1089 01:10:31,898 --> 01:10:32,565 Oh, I remember him. 1090 01:10:32,706 --> 01:10:34,933 He was the one who kept yanking quarters out of your ears. 1091 01:10:34,963 --> 01:10:36,358 Why did he take his shirt off? 1092 01:10:36,758 --> 01:10:39,559 I think he didn't want to spill his dinner on it or something. 1093 01:10:39,839 --> 01:10:41,039 Can pass over Cranberry Sauce? 1094 01:10:41,138 --> 01:10:43,558 - Who wants some chicken? - What's happening here? 1095 01:10:44,518 --> 01:10:48,199 What usually happens when families sit down to a civilized meal together. 1096 01:10:48,299 --> 01:10:49,299 They talk. 1097 01:10:49,379 --> 01:10:50,634 - Cranberry Sauce? - Yes, please. 1098 01:10:50,664 --> 01:10:51,659 Who wants some chicken? 1099 01:10:51,759 --> 01:10:53,440 - I do. - I'd love some! 1100 01:11:02,439 --> 01:11:03,439 Wait. 1101 01:11:03,874 --> 01:11:06,104 I never said you could do this. 1102 01:11:06,243 --> 01:11:08,712 - Do what? - Let Kate get so attached. 1103 01:11:10,014 --> 01:11:11,462 That's so terrible? 1104 01:11:11,583 --> 01:11:12,862 Yeah, this is not your family. 1105 01:11:14,285 --> 01:11:16,463 If you want to get closer to me, dial direct, 1106 01:11:16,523 --> 01:11:18,663 But don't do it through my kids. 1107 01:11:28,468 --> 01:11:30,263 Never in my life have I wanted to hit a woman... 1108 01:11:30,293 --> 01:11:32,845 the way I want to hit you right now. 1109 01:11:41,717 --> 01:11:43,241 When you are wrong... 1110 01:11:43,385 --> 01:11:46,251 you are so wrong, it's scary. 1111 01:11:58,501 --> 01:11:59,501 Your whole life, 1112 01:11:59,636 --> 01:12:01,066 you never did something for no reason... 1113 01:12:01,096 --> 01:12:03,027 except to make somebody happy? 1114 01:12:03,274 --> 01:12:04,668 What is it you want from me? 1115 01:12:04,775 --> 01:12:06,568 A little trust would be nice! 1116 01:12:07,211 --> 01:12:10,468 And if you care about us, would it kill you to show it? 1117 01:12:11,116 --> 01:12:12,515 What do you mean, "us"? 1118 01:12:13,218 --> 01:12:15,948 Since when did you and my children become "us"? 1119 01:12:16,488 --> 01:12:18,388 You're just you, Lou. Okay? 1120 01:12:18,523 --> 01:12:20,570 Me and the girls... that's us. 1121 01:12:25,464 --> 01:12:27,471 I was talking about you and me. 1122 01:12:43,652 --> 01:12:46,152 Mom, if you don't come out soon, it's gonna be new year's day! 1123 01:12:46,454 --> 01:12:47,574 You're gonna miss the party. 1124 01:12:47,655 --> 01:12:50,032 All right. I'm almost ready. Here's a little something. 1125 01:12:50,426 --> 01:12:52,443 - Ooh, an arm. - This year, Mom! 1126 01:12:52,473 --> 01:12:54,443 - Come on. - All right, all right. Here's a little more. 1127 01:12:54,473 --> 01:12:55,473 All right. Are you ready? 1128 01:12:55,503 --> 01:12:56,513 - Come on! - Come on, Mom! 1129 01:12:56,853 --> 01:12:59,574 All right. One, two, three! Here I am! 1130 01:13:00,454 --> 01:13:02,914 - You're a Mermaid! - No, I'm a Lumberjack. 1131 01:13:03,034 --> 01:13:04,649 - I'm a Car Salesman. - Your beautiful tail! 1132 01:13:04,679 --> 01:13:06,802 Thank you. what you think? 1133 01:13:06,944 --> 01:13:08,874 If I would have had this costume when you guys were little, 1134 01:13:08,904 --> 01:13:11,855 I would have done my ironing and all your diapers in it. 1135 01:13:16,688 --> 01:13:19,122 - Oh, my God! Wait a minute! - Is this the Mermaid bus? 1136 01:13:20,676 --> 01:13:22,647 All right, I can tell by my Mermaid watch... 1137 01:13:22,677 --> 01:13:24,456 it's time to get into my Mermaid car... 1138 01:13:24,486 --> 01:13:25,759 and hit the Mermaid road! 1139 01:13:25,898 --> 01:13:27,477 And get the Mermaid out of here. 1140 01:13:27,577 --> 01:13:28,602 All right. You get my Mermaid coat... 1141 01:13:28,632 --> 01:13:30,478 and you get my Mermaid keys. 1142 01:13:30,838 --> 01:13:31,838 Oh, my God. 1143 01:13:33,538 --> 01:13:35,638 Oh, I was hoping I would be fresh for the party. 1144 01:13:37,279 --> 01:13:38,379 - Bye, Mom. - Bye, Mom. 1145 01:13:39,039 --> 01:13:41,279 - Have fun. Bye! - Good-bye! 1146 01:13:41,379 --> 01:13:42,779 - Have a good time! - I will! 1147 01:13:42,879 --> 01:13:43,919 Bye, Miss Mermaid! 1148 01:13:44,019 --> 01:13:46,380 Good-bye, Miss junior Mermaids! I will! 1149 01:13:59,460 --> 01:14:01,461 - Hi, Mary. How are you? - Hi, George. 1150 01:14:05,681 --> 01:14:06,432 Thank you. 1151 01:14:06,462 --> 01:14:08,922 Where's that handsome Hunk of a husband of yours, huh? 1152 01:14:09,614 --> 01:14:11,042 Out front, talking baseball. 1153 01:14:12,350 --> 01:14:13,702 He just bet 20 bucks... 1154 01:14:13,732 --> 01:14:15,932 they couldn't name three players that batted over .400. 1155 01:14:17,056 --> 01:14:19,684 Hey! Buzz! I'll be right back. 1156 01:14:20,726 --> 01:14:23,363 Ty Cobb, Joe Jackson, Nap Lajoie! 1157 01:14:23,463 --> 01:14:24,684 You owe me 20 bucks! 1158 01:14:26,132 --> 01:14:28,692 The last day ever of this year. 1159 01:14:30,136 --> 01:14:31,685 You want to make some resolutions? 1160 01:14:32,606 --> 01:14:34,733 What are resolutions? 1161 01:14:35,276 --> 01:14:36,985 They're sort of like wishes. 1162 01:14:37,678 --> 01:14:39,305 I wish I could swim forever. 1163 01:14:42,551 --> 01:14:44,546 I wish I had known Anne Frank. 1164 01:14:45,687 --> 01:14:48,647 And that I didn't lust after Joe so much. 1165 01:14:54,663 --> 01:14:56,987 Oh, put that right here. Boy, can we use that. 1166 01:14:57,433 --> 01:15:00,073 Why don't you stick around and have a drink? It's almost midnight. 1167 01:15:00,987 --> 01:15:01,987 Oh. Sorry. 1168 01:15:03,974 --> 01:15:05,737 - Hi, handsome. - Hi, Carrie. 1169 01:15:05,909 --> 01:15:07,433 Nice Caretaker's costume. 1170 01:15:07,788 --> 01:15:08,788 Hi, Joe. 1171 01:15:08,888 --> 01:15:10,538 - Hi, Mrs. Flax. You look nice. - Thanks. 1172 01:15:10,647 --> 01:15:11,649 - Mrs. Flax. - Yeah? 1173 01:15:11,750 --> 01:15:14,241 - I think it's time you and I had a little dance. - Okay. 1174 01:15:18,590 --> 01:15:20,170 Little Bo Peep. 1175 01:15:20,291 --> 01:15:22,230 - Honey, can you help us with these? - Yes. 1176 01:15:25,898 --> 01:15:27,551 - All right, now spin me. - Yeah, okay. 1177 01:15:28,491 --> 01:15:30,191 - Watch my tail. - Yeah. I'm sorry. 1178 01:15:30,737 --> 01:15:33,433 I'm on pins and needles. Did you win the $20? 1179 01:15:34,192 --> 01:15:36,992 What do you think? I'm planning a pilgrimage. 1180 01:15:37,092 --> 01:15:38,742 - Lourdes? - No, Cooperstown. 1181 01:15:39,447 --> 01:15:40,914 - Ask me why. - No. 1182 01:15:41,048 --> 01:15:43,258 - I'm gonna tell you anyway. - Yeah, I thought you would. 1183 01:15:43,288 --> 01:15:44,293 Yeah. 1184 01:15:45,788 --> 01:15:47,243 The baseball hall of fame. 1185 01:15:49,024 --> 01:15:50,654 Before I bite the dust, 1186 01:15:50,760 --> 01:15:52,994 there's three things that I want from life: 1187 01:15:53,094 --> 01:15:54,493 To touch Lou Gehrig's glove, 1188 01:15:56,473 --> 01:15:58,033 To be in Florida for Spring Training... 1189 01:15:59,054 --> 01:16:00,874 and to take you with me on both trips. 1190 01:16:01,371 --> 01:16:03,168 Two out of three, that's not bad. 1191 01:16:03,840 --> 01:16:05,775 All right, ask me in a couple of months. 1192 01:16:05,876 --> 01:16:07,234 - You mean if you're still here. - Exactly. 1193 01:16:07,264 --> 01:16:08,671 Two minutes, everybody! 1194 01:16:08,913 --> 01:16:10,175 Get some champagne! 1195 01:16:10,714 --> 01:16:12,935 Turn up the TV! 1196 01:16:16,286 --> 01:16:18,336 Streamers? Does everybody have a streamer? 1197 01:16:20,592 --> 01:16:22,177 What are we gonna do, Rachel? 1198 01:16:22,395 --> 01:16:24,527 - About what, Lou? - This relationship. 1199 01:16:24,630 --> 01:16:27,497 - What's the matter with this relationship? - It's stuck. 1200 01:16:27,800 --> 01:16:29,558 It has to move or it has to end. 1201 01:16:29,658 --> 01:16:31,178 It can't just stay the same. 1202 01:16:31,939 --> 01:16:34,498 You know, Lou, ultimatums don't sit really well with me. 1203 01:16:35,178 --> 01:16:38,178 - Noisemakers? - Thank you, Carrie. 1204 01:16:38,208 --> 01:16:40,045 - Lou? - No, thank you. 1205 01:16:40,915 --> 01:16:43,249 What would you say if I asked you to marry me? 1206 01:16:43,651 --> 01:16:45,255 First, I'd remind you that you're still married, 1207 01:16:45,285 --> 01:16:48,654 and then I'd probably write... from New Mexico. 1208 01:16:50,426 --> 01:16:51,560 Live with me. 1209 01:16:52,194 --> 01:16:53,194 No. 1210 01:16:54,561 --> 01:16:57,060 Ten, Nine, Eight, 1211 01:16:57,560 --> 01:16:58,757 Seven, Six, 1212 01:16:59,480 --> 01:17:01,181 Five, Four, 1213 01:17:01,269 --> 01:17:04,071 Three, Two, One! 1214 01:17:04,138 --> 01:17:08,443 Happy New Year 1964! 1215 01:17:28,704 --> 01:17:29,534 So far, 1216 01:17:29,636 --> 01:17:31,505 1964's a big drag. 1217 01:17:32,773 --> 01:17:34,245 Are you coming home with me? 1218 01:17:37,912 --> 01:17:39,278 Another night. 1219 01:17:41,486 --> 01:17:42,486 Happy New Year. 1220 01:17:51,525 --> 01:17:55,095 Happy New Year, everybody, 1221 01:17:55,163 --> 01:17:58,831 A Very Happy New Year. 1222 01:18:06,009 --> 01:18:07,488 - Hey, Joe! - Yeah? 1223 01:18:07,518 --> 01:18:10,077 I think my car's dead. 1224 01:18:10,180 --> 01:18:11,180 You think so? 1225 01:18:15,253 --> 01:18:17,551 - Can you help me? - Yeah, sure. 1226 01:18:18,570 --> 01:18:19,610 Good. 1227 01:18:39,547 --> 01:18:42,016 Thanks for the ride, Joe. 1228 01:18:42,150 --> 01:18:44,277 Sure. You bet. 1229 01:18:48,493 --> 01:18:50,390 Oh. 1230 01:18:56,966 --> 01:18:57,966 Sorry. 1231 01:18:59,515 --> 01:19:01,494 - Could you help me? - Yeah. 1232 01:19:02,014 --> 01:19:03,614 I have trouble with this tail. 1233 01:19:06,810 --> 01:19:07,915 Happy New Year, Joe. 1234 01:19:18,223 --> 01:19:19,496 You kissed him? 1235 01:19:20,658 --> 01:19:22,897 You kissed him? How could you do that? 1236 01:19:23,562 --> 01:19:25,717 How could you let her kiss you? 1237 01:19:25,798 --> 01:19:26,717 Charlotte, for God's sake, 1238 01:19:26,747 --> 01:19:28,718 it was just a little New Year's Eve kiss. 1239 01:19:28,818 --> 01:19:30,958 - You don't believe in New Year's. - I know. 1240 01:19:32,518 --> 01:19:34,706 Hey, what are you guys fighting about? 1241 01:19:34,741 --> 01:19:36,499 - Nothing. - Everything. 1242 01:19:36,899 --> 01:19:39,699 Come on. Get back in the house before you freeze your little butt off. 1243 01:19:40,248 --> 01:19:42,394 What's the matter with Charlotte? Is she gonna run away again? 1244 01:19:42,424 --> 01:19:44,080 God willing. No, just kidding. 1245 01:19:44,580 --> 01:19:47,020 - Did you have a nice time? - I had a lovely time, thank you. 1246 01:19:47,423 --> 01:19:49,663 Are you gonna stay out there all night, Miss Poopy Face? 1247 01:19:51,326 --> 01:19:53,124 Why did you let her? 1248 01:19:53,263 --> 01:19:55,821 She kisses everybody. Don't you know that? 1249 01:19:55,899 --> 01:19:58,197 It doesn't mean you're special or anything. 1250 01:19:58,334 --> 01:20:01,222 It doesn't mean she likes you or anything like that. 1251 01:20:02,582 --> 01:20:04,501 She doesn't like anybody! 1252 01:20:36,610 --> 01:20:39,671 Okay, Mom. You want to drive Lou away, 1253 01:20:39,848 --> 01:20:40,848 that's your business. 1254 01:20:41,649 --> 01:20:44,516 You want Joe... that's war. 1255 01:21:06,977 --> 01:21:09,028 Care to dance, Mrs. Flax? 1256 01:21:09,479 --> 01:21:11,641 Mrs. Polka Flax. 1257 01:21:15,153 --> 01:21:17,485 She's gonna kill you if you put those on. 1258 01:21:17,655 --> 01:21:19,214 Go back to your rocks, Kate. 1259 01:21:19,858 --> 01:21:20,858 Okay. 1260 01:21:30,136 --> 01:21:32,971 Act your age, not your shoe size. 1261 01:21:33,732 --> 01:21:34,732 Who's this? 1262 01:21:35,212 --> 01:21:37,232 "Know your colors, know your fabrics." 1263 01:21:37,311 --> 01:21:39,332 "That's what I tell all my little girls." 1264 01:21:45,420 --> 01:21:46,967 Katie, shall I tell you a secret? 1265 01:21:47,055 --> 01:21:48,055 Yeah. 1266 01:21:48,933 --> 01:21:50,934 I'm in love with Joe Peretti. 1267 01:21:51,160 --> 01:21:52,734 - Do you kiss each other? - Yes. 1268 01:21:52,828 --> 01:21:54,934 - On the lips? - Yes. 1269 01:21:55,094 --> 01:21:57,235 Like Superman and Lois Lane? 1270 01:21:57,366 --> 01:21:59,467 Well... 1271 01:21:59,670 --> 01:22:01,035 What's it like? 1272 01:22:01,635 --> 01:22:03,534 Sometimes when you kiss a person, 1273 01:22:03,564 --> 01:22:05,066 it's like nothing happens. 1274 01:22:05,096 --> 01:22:06,100 It's like you're kissing your hand... 1275 01:22:06,130 --> 01:22:08,336 or you're kissing yourself in the mirror, 1276 01:22:08,736 --> 01:22:10,873 But when it's someone you love... 1277 01:22:11,014 --> 01:22:12,736 I know. There's chemicals. 1278 01:22:12,976 --> 01:22:15,216 - You mean chemistry, Fish Head. - Oh. 1279 01:22:15,820 --> 01:22:17,036 Okay. How do I look? 1280 01:22:17,088 --> 01:22:19,216 Like someone drew all over you. 1281 01:22:20,837 --> 01:22:21,737 Let's Celebrate. 1282 01:22:21,837 --> 01:22:22,837 Cool. 1283 01:22:33,139 --> 01:22:34,731 What are you doing? 1284 01:22:34,908 --> 01:22:37,901 Sucking out the pimentos. They give me hernias. 1285 01:22:38,546 --> 01:22:40,099 You mean, hives, Fish Head. 1286 01:22:41,182 --> 01:22:42,979 Hit me, sergeant. 1287 01:22:43,718 --> 01:22:45,790 Okay, but you can only have one, 1288 01:22:45,887 --> 01:22:47,840 and you have to sip it. Okay? 1289 01:23:02,973 --> 01:23:04,602 Tell me about when I was born. 1290 01:23:05,909 --> 01:23:08,293 - Aren't you sick of hearing this story? - No. 1291 01:23:09,981 --> 01:23:11,005 Okay. 1292 01:23:12,082 --> 01:23:15,951 You were born in a hospital in Minneapolis... 1293 01:23:16,087 --> 01:23:18,055 on a cold Winter's day. 1294 01:23:18,590 --> 01:23:20,785 And when Mrs. Flax brought you home, 1295 01:23:20,925 --> 01:23:22,825 I pretended you were mine. 1296 01:23:23,496 --> 01:23:24,644 Where was Pop? 1297 01:23:26,632 --> 01:23:27,826 I don't know. 1298 01:23:37,511 --> 01:23:39,386 Come on, I'll show you the convent. 1299 01:23:51,894 --> 01:23:53,047 Finish the story. 1300 01:23:53,529 --> 01:23:54,948 Come on. I'll show you the tower. 1301 01:23:55,065 --> 01:23:56,108 You've never seen it. 1302 01:24:30,002 --> 01:24:33,461 - Look, there it is. Isn't it neat? - Neat. 1303 01:24:34,007 --> 01:24:35,736 I want to go up. I'm gonna go up. 1304 01:24:35,876 --> 01:24:38,752 - Not me. I'll fall off. - No, you won't. 1305 01:24:41,081 --> 01:24:43,277 How you gonna get up there in those shoes? 1306 01:24:43,418 --> 01:24:44,616 I'll manage. 1307 01:24:45,920 --> 01:24:47,253 I'm gonna go collect rocks. 1308 01:24:47,789 --> 01:24:50,534 Okay. I'll be right back, so don't go anywhere. 1309 01:24:50,754 --> 01:24:51,754 - Okay. - Okay, bye. 1310 01:26:47,456 --> 01:26:49,822 Oh, god, this is real. 1311 01:26:50,359 --> 01:26:51,724 This is really real. 1312 01:27:43,217 --> 01:27:43,808 Joseph! Come quick! 1313 01:27:43,952 --> 01:27:45,146 Get her inside. 1314 01:27:51,327 --> 01:27:52,327 Katie! 1315 01:27:55,097 --> 01:27:57,675 Look, Joseph, get an ambulance. 1316 01:27:59,267 --> 01:28:03,136 Oh, Katie! Katie! Oh, Katie! 1317 01:28:03,204 --> 01:28:05,973 Katie. Katie. 1318 01:28:06,041 --> 01:28:09,711 Katie, please don't die. Please don't die. 1319 01:28:38,579 --> 01:28:40,108 Joe, take Charlotte home, 1320 01:28:40,314 --> 01:28:42,111 we'll call when there's news. 1321 01:28:42,249 --> 01:28:43,249 Tell Lou. 1322 01:31:04,275 --> 01:31:06,743 Katydid... 1323 01:31:09,377 --> 01:31:13,315 You were born in a hospital in Minneapolis... 1324 01:31:13,382 --> 01:31:15,818 on a cold Winter day. 1325 01:31:15,921 --> 01:31:18,014 I brought you home... 1326 01:31:18,190 --> 01:31:21,698 and Charlotte pretended that you were hers. 1327 01:31:22,094 --> 01:31:24,798 She even tried to make you call her Mom. 1328 01:31:27,659 --> 01:31:32,335 And we... we... 1329 01:31:32,402 --> 01:31:33,998 We tickled your ears, 1330 01:31:34,106 --> 01:31:36,399 and we watched you sleep... 1331 01:31:37,211 --> 01:31:40,375 and... the only thing that... 1332 01:31:42,279 --> 01:31:45,744 The only thing that we ever agreed on... 1333 01:31:45,887 --> 01:31:47,600 was that you were... 1334 01:31:47,787 --> 01:31:50,799 a wonderful child. 1335 01:32:32,139 --> 01:32:35,107 Charlotte? Charlotte? 1336 01:32:38,345 --> 01:32:39,778 She's gonna be all right. 1337 01:32:40,481 --> 01:32:43,678 They're keeping her in one more night for observation. 1338 01:32:46,554 --> 01:32:48,987 Your mother's on her way home to pick up some clothes. 1339 01:33:06,777 --> 01:33:07,777 She's okay. 1340 01:33:12,617 --> 01:33:13,710 She's okay. 1341 01:33:34,041 --> 01:33:35,353 You look different. 1342 01:33:38,244 --> 01:33:39,362 You look beautiful. 1343 01:33:49,691 --> 01:33:51,750 - Take care. - You too. 1344 01:33:52,794 --> 01:33:55,194 - Okay. Bye. - Bye. 1345 01:35:01,004 --> 01:35:03,004 If you're smart, you'll just stay away from me. 1346 01:35:19,024 --> 01:35:20,024 I mean it. 1347 01:35:31,605 --> 01:35:33,626 You want to take the book? 1348 01:35:34,241 --> 01:35:36,232 What the hell were you thinking about? 1349 01:35:36,410 --> 01:35:37,476 She could have died! 1350 01:35:37,544 --> 01:35:40,480 Your sister, who you were supposed to be watching, could have died! 1351 01:35:40,615 --> 01:35:42,026 What was she doing up there? 1352 01:35:42,076 --> 01:35:43,006 What the hell were you doing... 1353 01:35:43,050 --> 01:35:44,686 I know what you were doing up there. 1354 01:35:44,876 --> 01:35:47,877 The whole goddamn town knows what you were doing up there. 1355 01:35:49,255 --> 01:35:51,356 Mom. Mom... 1356 01:35:51,424 --> 01:35:53,051 I'm warning you, I'm angry! 1357 01:35:53,161 --> 01:35:55,128 I'm crazy angry! 1358 01:35:58,000 --> 01:36:01,368 Don't walk away from me, Mom! You're not gonna walk away from me! 1359 01:36:01,505 --> 01:36:04,879 I am not invisible! Talk to me! 1360 01:36:04,972 --> 01:36:07,507 Now! 1361 01:36:07,611 --> 01:36:09,310 Yes, I made a mistake! 1362 01:36:09,347 --> 01:36:11,690 Yes, I am really, really sorry! 1363 01:36:11,749 --> 01:36:15,207 It was a big mistake! I know that! 1364 01:36:15,386 --> 01:36:17,441 You make mistakes! You're always screwing up, 1365 01:36:17,471 --> 01:36:18,811 and we're always paying for it! 1366 01:36:18,857 --> 01:36:21,931 Every time you get dumped! Every time you dump on somebody! 1367 01:36:22,011 --> 01:36:23,131 And it's just... 1368 01:36:23,531 --> 01:36:25,832 it's not fair, Mom! It is not fair! 1369 01:36:29,536 --> 01:36:30,536 God! 1370 01:36:42,050 --> 01:36:44,693 I am sick and tired of being judged by you. 1371 01:36:44,793 --> 01:36:45,456 You're a kid! 1372 01:36:45,486 --> 01:36:46,632 Okay. When you become an adult, 1373 01:36:46,662 --> 01:36:48,233 you can live your life any way you want to! 1374 01:36:48,263 --> 01:36:49,034 But until then, 1375 01:36:49,064 --> 01:36:51,014 we're gonna live my life my way! 1376 01:36:55,130 --> 01:36:56,135 Start packing. 1377 01:36:57,633 --> 01:36:59,835 - No! - I said pack! 1378 01:37:00,069 --> 01:37:00,975 This move is on you! 1379 01:37:01,070 --> 01:37:03,194 If lover boy doesn't like it, that's too goddamn bad! 1380 01:37:03,224 --> 01:37:05,696 This is not about him! This is about me, okay? 1381 01:37:05,809 --> 01:37:07,636 That's over! He is gone! He has left! 1382 01:37:07,686 --> 01:37:10,136 - Surprise, surprise! - No, it's not like that! 1383 01:37:10,236 --> 01:37:13,697 Maybe your life works for you, but it doesn't work for me, 1384 01:37:13,797 --> 01:37:15,172 - and I want to stay! - And do what? 1385 01:37:15,202 --> 01:37:16,487 Finish High School! 1386 01:37:16,588 --> 01:37:18,837 Great start. What's your major? Town tramp? 1387 01:37:18,917 --> 01:37:21,018 No, Mom, the town already has one. 1388 01:37:56,565 --> 01:37:57,565 You know... 1389 01:37:58,701 --> 01:38:01,802 You're just one year younger than I was when I had you. 1390 01:38:02,436 --> 01:38:04,202 If you hate my life so much, 1391 01:38:04,274 --> 01:38:07,743 why are you doing your damnedest to make the same mistakes? 1392 01:38:16,321 --> 01:38:18,624 How do you feel about this guy? 1393 01:38:20,725 --> 01:38:22,545 I thought I loved him. 1394 01:38:22,705 --> 01:38:24,025 That sounds familiar. 1395 01:38:26,866 --> 01:38:29,706 And I thought you were gonna take him away. 1396 01:38:42,850 --> 01:38:44,247 Did you love my father? 1397 01:38:44,316 --> 01:38:47,486 Yeah, I did. 1398 01:38:52,027 --> 01:38:54,027 What was he like? 1399 01:38:57,208 --> 01:39:00,660 Oh, he was charming and... 1400 01:39:00,803 --> 01:39:02,599 He made me feel really special... 1401 01:39:02,706 --> 01:39:04,329 for about a minute and a half. 1402 01:39:05,375 --> 01:39:06,809 And then he was gone. 1403 01:39:10,314 --> 01:39:11,810 What did he look like? 1404 01:39:11,916 --> 01:39:13,650 He looked like you, only taller. 1405 01:39:15,753 --> 01:39:17,251 I don't have any pictures. 1406 01:39:17,356 --> 01:39:19,251 We took pictures at the wedding, 1407 01:39:19,331 --> 01:39:21,031 and they didn't come out. 1408 01:39:21,960 --> 01:39:24,652 I guess I should have known then. 1409 01:39:25,465 --> 01:39:27,302 He's never coming back, is he? 1410 01:39:27,352 --> 01:39:28,352 No. 1411 01:39:32,673 --> 01:39:34,233 Has he ever even seen me? 1412 01:39:34,341 --> 01:39:36,713 Yeah, he did once. You were about four. 1413 01:39:39,747 --> 01:39:41,274 He wanted us back? 1414 01:39:41,354 --> 01:39:42,494 No, he met some other woman, 1415 01:39:42,554 --> 01:39:44,714 and he wanted to get married. 1416 01:39:50,493 --> 01:39:52,654 How do you feel about Joe leaving? 1417 01:39:58,834 --> 01:39:59,834 It's fine. 1418 01:40:04,074 --> 01:40:08,156 I guess it's a little too late for our Birds-and-Bees Talk, isn't it? 1419 01:40:12,517 --> 01:40:14,337 Mom... 1420 01:40:17,217 --> 01:40:19,838 Can we please stay? 1421 01:40:21,560 --> 01:40:22,828 I don't know, Charlotte. 1422 01:40:22,928 --> 01:40:25,458 There's gonna be so much talk. This is such a small town. 1423 01:40:26,165 --> 01:40:27,859 You know, there's always talk. 1424 01:40:27,934 --> 01:40:30,059 It's just usually it's about you. 1425 01:40:31,719 --> 01:40:32,819 Sorry. 1426 01:40:40,145 --> 01:40:43,721 Just for a year. Just give it a year. 1427 01:40:45,652 --> 01:40:47,653 Okay? 1428 01:40:50,893 --> 01:40:52,258 I don't know. 1429 01:41:02,305 --> 01:41:05,342 Mrs. Flax promised she'd try and stay put. 1430 01:41:06,677 --> 01:41:08,723 I knew that would be a hard one for her to keep. 1431 01:41:22,394 --> 01:41:25,105 But three months later, she and Lou were still sparring. 1432 01:41:28,200 --> 01:41:29,966 He took us to the baseball hall of fame; 1433 01:41:30,036 --> 01:41:31,469 his idea of heaven. 1434 01:41:31,605 --> 01:41:33,346 - Mom was kind of bored, - Come here. 1435 01:41:33,773 --> 01:41:35,726 But we thought she hid it quite well. 1436 01:41:38,045 --> 01:41:41,267 This... this is Lou Gehrig's glove. 1437 01:41:41,682 --> 01:41:43,616 You see that? 1438 01:41:43,751 --> 01:41:45,743 Okay, you touched it. All right, guys. 1439 01:41:46,522 --> 01:41:48,045 - What's for lunch? - I don't know. 1440 01:41:48,075 --> 01:41:49,046 Hey... Come on. 1441 01:41:58,433 --> 01:41:59,991 If they squeeze your toes, 1442 01:42:00,135 --> 01:42:03,049 chew them for a couple hours. It softens them up real nice. 1443 01:42:03,473 --> 01:42:06,409 You don't believe me? Eskimos do it all the time. 1444 01:42:06,643 --> 01:42:08,373 Their wives do it, yeah. 1445 01:42:08,512 --> 01:42:10,650 Would you do that for your old man, chew his shoes? 1446 01:42:10,730 --> 01:42:12,130 - I don't think so. Bye-bye. - Bye. 1447 01:42:15,352 --> 01:42:16,731 Hey, give me a break. 1448 01:42:17,289 --> 01:42:18,571 I'm a nice old man. 1449 01:42:18,671 --> 01:42:20,111 I'd watch it if I were you, Lou. 1450 01:42:20,625 --> 01:42:22,145 I might decide to move to a real city. 1451 01:42:23,028 --> 01:42:24,972 I hate all these trees and weather. 1452 01:42:26,352 --> 01:42:27,563 Ta-ta. 1453 01:42:28,000 --> 01:42:30,872 She won't admit it, but they get along real well. 1454 01:42:32,239 --> 01:42:33,239 Yeah... 1455 01:42:34,341 --> 01:42:37,513 Trees and weather can really get to a person. 1456 01:42:53,493 --> 01:42:55,929 Let me take these for you. 1457 01:42:56,066 --> 01:42:58,236 I got quite a reputation for a while. 1458 01:42:58,802 --> 01:43:01,175 Even Mary O’Brien was impressed. 1459 01:43:01,515 --> 01:43:02,451 It's not easy, 1460 01:43:02,504 --> 01:43:05,531 but I'm trying to keep romance on the back burner. 1461 01:43:14,919 --> 01:43:17,377 Joe moved to California and opened up a Nursery. 1462 01:43:17,888 --> 01:43:18,738 We still write. 1463 01:43:18,857 --> 01:43:22,691 He sends me funny postcards with palm trees on them. 1464 01:43:35,509 --> 01:43:37,456 Greek Myths are my new passion. 1465 01:43:42,315 --> 01:43:43,649 Hi. 1466 01:43:47,689 --> 01:43:49,361 Charlotte, we're not Greek. 1467 01:43:53,162 --> 01:43:54,782 Kate's back in Olympic Form, 1468 01:43:55,865 --> 01:43:57,082 But, since the accident, 1469 01:43:57,166 --> 01:43:58,783 sometimes her hearing gets fuzzy. 1470 01:44:01,837 --> 01:44:04,742 I think I heard Mom say she'd be making a main course tonight. 1471 01:44:11,363 --> 01:44:12,745 - Nah. - Nah. 1472 01:46:33,637 --> 01:46:35,739 Hey, what are you doing with that thing in here? 1473 01:46:35,807 --> 01:46:37,908 - Indoor Swimming? - No way. 1474 01:46:37,975 --> 01:46:40,243 - Take it out of here. - Mom.