1 00:00:02,333 --> 00:00:04,392 Hi, Mr. Newman. 2 00:00:04,935 --> 00:00:07,199 Right this way, Michael. 3 00:00:08,506 --> 00:00:11,839 Hey, my new star. Congratulations. Sit down, big guy. 4 00:00:12,043 --> 00:00:13,601 All right. 5 00:00:13,811 --> 00:00:16,245 I am a little tired. 6 00:00:16,447 --> 00:00:18,779 The family was up late last night celebrating. 7 00:00:18,983 --> 00:00:21,816 You really knocked one out of the park last night, didn't you? 8 00:00:22,019 --> 00:00:23,145 Hey, you were great too. 9 00:00:23,354 --> 00:00:25,584 All you gotta do is draw up the construction plans. 10 00:00:25,790 --> 00:00:27,883 If Watsuhita commits to the bulk of the funds... 11 00:00:28,092 --> 00:00:30,390 ...I'm looking at my new partner. 12 00:00:33,397 --> 00:00:35,194 I thought I was already your partner. 13 00:00:35,933 --> 00:00:37,400 Whoa, cowboy. 14 00:00:37,601 --> 00:00:40,399 I said, "Land the Watsuhita account, you'll get promoted." 15 00:00:40,604 --> 00:00:45,007 - I didn't mean right this second. - But I already told my wife, sir. 16 00:00:45,209 --> 00:00:47,541 I spent money I don't have. 17 00:00:47,745 --> 00:00:50,646 To do these documents is gonna take me months. 18 00:00:51,315 --> 00:00:53,340 Then you better get started. 19 00:01:00,791 --> 00:01:02,656 Wow, I just got a big headache! 20 00:01:04,361 --> 00:01:07,387 - Was I hit by a train or something? - I didn't see anything. 21 00:01:07,598 --> 00:01:11,898 I forgot to tell you. I hung out with your friend Janine this weekend. 22 00:01:12,103 --> 00:01:16,062 I hope she's doing your brother right now, you big-headed buffoon. 23 00:01:25,983 --> 00:01:27,416 No, no, no. You got more. 24 00:01:29,887 --> 00:01:31,684 Yeah. 25 00:01:33,657 --> 00:01:37,525 Anyway, the sooner you get back to work... 26 00:01:37,728 --> 00:01:39,593 ...the sooner you'll be partnerized. 27 00:01:39,797 --> 00:01:42,197 - I taste shit. - You do? 28 00:01:42,933 --> 00:01:48,428 Stacy! Did you put shit in my lunch? 29 00:01:49,607 --> 00:01:51,472 I'm gonna get going now, sir. 30 00:01:51,675 --> 00:01:53,768 Stacy! 31 00:01:59,583 --> 00:02:01,551 Have you considered the consequences... 32 00:02:01,752 --> 00:02:04,050 ...of the thing you're thinking about doing? 33 00:02:04,588 --> 00:02:06,954 Yeah. What are you saying, I shouldn't do it? 34 00:02:07,158 --> 00:02:10,992 It's your life. What you do with the remote is your decision, Michael. 35 00:02:11,195 --> 00:02:15,291 I know, so, I mean, we're talking a couple of months here. 36 00:02:15,499 --> 00:02:18,024 I fast-forward through it, what am I gonna miss? 37 00:02:18,235 --> 00:02:19,998 Thirty arguments and a haircut? 38 00:02:20,538 --> 00:02:22,267 Remember the leprechaun? 39 00:02:23,307 --> 00:02:26,071 The one from the cereal ad. 40 00:02:27,545 --> 00:02:30,605 "They're magically delicious." That guy? 41 00:02:30,815 --> 00:02:34,444 He's always chasing the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. 42 00:02:34,652 --> 00:02:38,383 But when he gets there at the end of the day... 43 00:02:39,890 --> 00:02:42,120 ...it's just corn flakes. 44 00:02:48,499 --> 00:02:50,262 - Michael. - Yes. 45 00:02:50,467 --> 00:02:54,597 - You don't understand the metaphor? - I won't do it, all right. 46 00:03:11,021 --> 00:03:12,579 - Dad? - Yeah. 47 00:03:12,790 --> 00:03:16,157 - We have some designs for you. - It's not a good time, man. 48 00:03:16,360 --> 00:03:18,351 Maybe they'll help you finish quicker. 49 00:03:18,562 --> 00:03:21,087 All right. You want me to look at it? Let me see. 50 00:03:21,732 --> 00:03:24,860 The ceiling's too high, the hallway's too narrow... 51 00:03:25,069 --> 00:03:27,299 ...stairway placement makes no sense at all. 52 00:03:27,504 --> 00:03:29,904 - What the hell's this room made of? - Pizza. 53 00:03:30,107 --> 00:03:33,474 Well, it's stupid. Next. What is yours made of? 54 00:03:33,944 --> 00:03:37,675 - Pickles. - Oh, don't be a baby. 55 00:03:37,882 --> 00:03:40,942 Michael, have you lost your mind? He's 7 years old. 56 00:03:41,151 --> 00:03:43,551 If he wants a playroom made of pizza, then why not? 57 00:03:43,754 --> 00:03:46,951 Maybe he's gotta grow up sometime and get the hell off Fantasy Island. 58 00:03:47,157 --> 00:03:50,422 Hey, pizza boy. Life ain't about being creative. 59 00:03:50,628 --> 00:03:53,927 It's about kissing ass, playing it safe, making your boss a lot of money... 60 00:03:54,131 --> 00:03:57,032 ...in hopes one day he might throw you a stinking bone. All right? 61 00:03:57,234 --> 00:03:58,929 Yes, sir. 62 00:03:59,370 --> 00:04:01,099 Ammer didn't make you partner, did he? 63 00:04:03,240 --> 00:04:06,038 Oh, honey, I'm so sorry. 64 00:04:06,644 --> 00:04:08,908 But we'll get through this, okay? I promise. 65 00:04:09,313 --> 00:04:11,907 Jeez! Man, that's all we ever do is get through it. 66 00:04:12,116 --> 00:04:14,277 When is it gonna end? 67 00:04:30,768 --> 00:04:32,030 Pretty sweet, eh? 68 00:04:32,236 --> 00:04:35,069 Two queen beds, full kitchen, steam shower... 69 00:04:35,272 --> 00:04:37,433 ...and satellite TV with surround sound. 70 00:04:38,575 --> 00:04:42,238 Why are you always trying to hurt me? One day I'm gonna hurt you back. 71 00:04:42,446 --> 00:04:45,438 Michael Newman, I didn't know you smoked cigars. 72 00:04:45,649 --> 00:04:47,276 And now's the time. 73 00:04:47,484 --> 00:04:49,042 No, Kathy, this isn't mine. 74 00:04:49,253 --> 00:04:52,780 I took it out of Kevin's hands. Yeah, he was smoking like a chimney. 75 00:04:52,990 --> 00:04:54,287 No, I wasn't! 76 00:04:54,491 --> 00:04:56,254 I think I smell marijuana in it. 77 00:04:56,460 --> 00:04:59,759 Kevin O'Doyle, you get your ass in this house right now! 78 00:04:59,964 --> 00:05:01,124 I hate you. 79 00:05:01,332 --> 00:05:04,768 Are you deaf? Move it! I don't wanna have to ask you again! 80 00:05:04,969 --> 00:05:06,960 Dope is for dopes, buddy! 81 00:05:07,171 --> 00:05:09,071 Get your ass in this house! 82 00:05:11,308 --> 00:05:12,900 We don't have any other choice, guys. 83 00:05:13,110 --> 00:05:17,308 - No fair! I don't wanna return my bike! - We have to, honey. 84 00:05:17,514 --> 00:05:20,278 - But Daddy gave them to us! - Because he loves you. 85 00:05:20,484 --> 00:05:22,748 Unfortunately, there was a mix-up at Daddy's work. 86 00:05:22,953 --> 00:05:24,853 We need to bring the bikes back for now. 87 00:05:25,055 --> 00:05:28,252 But I already told Kevin O'Doyle I got a new bike. 88 00:05:28,459 --> 00:05:31,223 Well, we can paint my old bike and make it look new. 89 00:05:31,428 --> 00:05:35,262 That's a girl's bike. All the kids will make fun of me. 90 00:05:35,666 --> 00:05:38,134 No! 91 00:05:39,536 --> 00:05:41,128 I wanna keep my bike! 92 00:05:41,338 --> 00:05:43,602 I can't take this anymore. 93 00:05:43,807 --> 00:05:45,468 Fast-forward me to my promotion. 94 00:05:50,981 --> 00:05:52,471 So here's to Michael Newman... 95 00:05:52,683 --> 00:05:55,675 ...the greatest partner I could ever dream of. 96 00:05:56,053 --> 00:05:57,680 Hear, hear! 97 00:05:58,155 --> 00:06:02,182 Thank you. Thank you, guys. My family thanks you. 98 00:06:02,393 --> 00:06:05,658 I'm gonna do the best I can and I won't let you down, I promise. 99 00:06:05,863 --> 00:06:07,524 Yeah! 100 00:06:08,198 --> 00:06:11,497 - Congratulations, Mr. Newman. - This is great. Thank you. 101 00:06:11,702 --> 00:06:13,192 How's it feel, killer? 102 00:06:13,404 --> 00:06:16,202 - Feels incredible, sir. - Well, you earned it. I'm telling you. 103 00:06:16,407 --> 00:06:18,568 Not just because of that Watsuhita project either. 104 00:06:18,776 --> 00:06:22,507 For helping me pick up the slack now I'm spending time with my lady. 105 00:06:22,713 --> 00:06:24,203 Hey, Dinkie. 106 00:06:24,882 --> 00:06:27,783 Are you kidding me? You guys have been dating a couple months now? 107 00:06:27,985 --> 00:06:30,249 That's pretty huge for this one. 108 00:06:32,756 --> 00:06:34,747 No, the first few months were easy. 109 00:06:34,958 --> 00:06:37,222 It was the one-year hump that was the tough part. 110 00:06:37,428 --> 00:06:41,489 Her inappropriate weekend with my brother in Cabo... 111 00:06:41,698 --> 00:06:43,495 ...well, that was a potential speed bump. 112 00:06:43,700 --> 00:06:46,635 But, well, Dr. Bergman helped us work through it, didn't he, honey? 113 00:06:46,837 --> 00:06:48,429 How's he doing for you and Donna? 114 00:06:48,939 --> 00:06:52,102 Dr. Bergman. What do you mean? 115 00:06:52,309 --> 00:06:55,506 Oh, you know what, sweetie? It's none of our business. 116 00:06:55,712 --> 00:06:58,613 Let's let Michael bask in his glory. Cheers. 117 00:06:58,816 --> 00:07:01,284 Bask away, partner. 118 00:07:02,052 --> 00:07:04,612 Took that bastard a year to promote me? 119 00:07:06,156 --> 00:07:08,090 What else did I miss? 120 00:07:08,392 --> 00:07:10,690 - Shit. - Need something, Mr. Newman? 121 00:07:10,861 --> 00:07:13,694 - Who are you? - Kirsten, your assistant. 122 00:07:13,897 --> 00:07:15,489 What happened to Alice? 123 00:07:15,699 --> 00:07:18,133 She moved to Accounting. Couldn't handle your hours. 124 00:07:18,702 --> 00:07:21,899 And she prefers to be called Alan now. Remember? 125 00:07:25,742 --> 00:07:27,300 No. 126 00:07:27,811 --> 00:07:30,109 No. 127 00:07:30,314 --> 00:07:33,545 No! And who the hell's Dr. Bergman? 128 00:07:34,284 --> 00:07:37,310 And I feel like Michael's making no effort to connect with me at all. 129 00:07:37,521 --> 00:07:40,285 No, no. I want to. I want to. It's... I'm on autopilot. 130 00:07:40,491 --> 00:07:43,460 "I'm on autopilot." More like auto-zombie. 131 00:07:43,660 --> 00:07:44,957 Good one, Donna. 132 00:07:46,063 --> 00:07:49,157 - "Good one, Donna"? - Michael, relax. 133 00:07:49,366 --> 00:07:51,960 Who is this bigmouth? Why can't you and I just talk? 134 00:07:52,169 --> 00:07:55,229 Why? Because there is no talking to you. You're never home to talk to. 135 00:07:55,439 --> 00:07:58,408 And when you are, you're just sitting there staring off into space. 136 00:07:58,609 --> 00:07:59,837 What do you want from me? 137 00:08:00,043 --> 00:08:02,238 This is what happens. He's gonna answer his phone. 138 00:08:04,148 --> 00:08:06,776 What the heck happened? I didn't even touch the remote. 139 00:08:06,984 --> 00:08:08,975 Great, you gonna start watching TV at dinner? 140 00:08:09,186 --> 00:08:10,653 Oh, can we? 141 00:08:11,221 --> 00:08:14,281 Samantha. My little angel. Look at you. 142 00:08:14,491 --> 00:08:15,981 Look how long your hair's getting. 143 00:08:16,193 --> 00:08:18,252 When did you grow up? Ben, get over here. 144 00:08:18,462 --> 00:08:20,191 Don't worry. I'm not gonna work tonight. 145 00:08:20,397 --> 00:08:22,456 Watch Dragon Tales together. What do you say? 146 00:08:22,666 --> 00:08:26,158 Dragon Tales is for babies, Dad. I wanna watch CSI. 147 00:08:26,370 --> 00:08:28,270 Yeah, CSI. 148 00:08:28,472 --> 00:08:30,497 It's the episode when they find the lady's arm. 149 00:08:30,707 --> 00:08:34,939 What happened? I missed the whole Dragon Tales era? 150 00:08:40,484 --> 00:08:42,145 Whoa, hey, hello. 151 00:08:43,587 --> 00:08:45,748 What are you doing? Come here! Give me my Twinkie! 152 00:08:45,956 --> 00:08:47,480 Get back here, you freaking gremlin! 153 00:08:47,691 --> 00:08:50,387 Don't yell at Peanut because he found your Twinkie stash. 154 00:08:50,594 --> 00:08:52,061 Who's Peanut? Where's Sundance? 155 00:08:52,262 --> 00:08:54,890 Don't mention Sundance. The kids just stopped crying. 156 00:08:55,098 --> 00:08:56,531 About what? Why? What happened? 157 00:08:59,069 --> 00:09:00,502 He died? 158 00:09:04,174 --> 00:09:08,804 Oh, no, no, no. Oh, no. 159 00:09:09,012 --> 00:09:12,243 The stupid idiot and soft fur. 160 00:09:12,449 --> 00:09:15,577 - Daddy held it in so long. - He was the best dog! 161 00:09:15,786 --> 00:09:18,311 He's finally letting himself feel it. 162 00:09:18,522 --> 00:09:22,720 One night when the duck's head was off... 163 00:09:22,926 --> 00:09:25,622 ...he tried to hump my leg and I didn't let him... 164 00:09:25,829 --> 00:09:28,389 ...and I should've and I'm sorry. 165 00:09:28,599 --> 00:09:32,865 - What an idiot. - It's okay, it's okay. 166 00:09:33,270 --> 00:09:35,568 What the heck did I do? 167 00:09:35,772 --> 00:09:38,741 I love you. Do you still love me? 168 00:09:41,144 --> 00:09:43,408 Oh, Michael. 169 00:09:43,614 --> 00:09:45,479 It's been... 170 00:09:45,682 --> 00:09:47,274 I'm really confused. 171 00:09:47,484 --> 00:09:51,284 No, no, no. I'll change, okay? I'll be a better man, I promise. 172 00:09:51,488 --> 00:09:54,582 Don't go, don't go. I'll stop working so much, okay? 173 00:09:54,791 --> 00:09:58,056 I'll be with you. Just stay with me. 174 00:09:58,262 --> 00:10:02,198 Oh, my God, it didn't take the duck long to get over Sundance. 175 00:10:02,899 --> 00:10:06,357 It's a little deviant, but it's kind of turning me on. 176 00:10:06,570 --> 00:10:09,198 Yeah, well, let's kiss and make up. 177 00:10:24,321 --> 00:10:27,085 No. No! 178 00:10:27,291 --> 00:10:29,418 It's not my fault. 179 00:10:29,626 --> 00:10:32,322 It jumped on its own. I didn't even hit the button. 180 00:10:32,529 --> 00:10:33,928 Not even close. 181 00:10:37,100 --> 00:10:38,465 Yes? 182 00:10:41,972 --> 00:10:44,497 - You scared... - Honey, what's going on down there? 183 00:10:44,708 --> 00:10:48,838 It's all right! L... There was a mouse! I killed it! 184 00:10:49,046 --> 00:10:53,005 It's dead! But it broke the table first! 185 00:10:53,216 --> 00:10:56,811 - How did you get in here? - I had a feeling you wanted to see me. 186 00:10:57,020 --> 00:10:58,954 I'm freaking out. This thing, it's broken. 187 00:10:59,156 --> 00:11:01,647 It's just... It's fast-forwarding on its own now. 188 00:11:01,858 --> 00:11:03,883 It's not a malfunction, it's a feature. 189 00:11:04,094 --> 00:11:07,928 It's using its memory to execute your preferences. 190 00:11:08,131 --> 00:11:09,962 It remembers stuff? What do you mean? 191 00:11:10,167 --> 00:11:13,796 It's an advanced piece of equipment, like TiVo. 192 00:11:14,304 --> 00:11:15,965 You could call it MeVo. 193 00:11:16,173 --> 00:11:19,199 I fast-forwarded through sex one time, I don't wanna skip it forever. 194 00:11:19,409 --> 00:11:21,036 I like sex. It feels good. 195 00:11:21,244 --> 00:11:25,442 Correct me if I'm wrong, but you fast-forwarded through an entire year. 196 00:11:25,649 --> 00:11:27,173 That's a lot of sex. 197 00:11:27,384 --> 00:11:30,945 Put it all together, that's like 30 minutes' worth for you. 198 00:11:31,154 --> 00:11:33,520 Oh, no, no. So what, everything I fast-forwarded... 199 00:11:33,724 --> 00:11:36,056 ...it's gonna do it on its own now? - Pretty much. 200 00:11:36,259 --> 00:11:38,386 No more showering, no more traffic. 201 00:11:38,595 --> 00:11:41,120 No more arguing. No more sickness. 202 00:11:41,331 --> 00:11:42,730 This is bad, this is bad. 203 00:11:42,933 --> 00:11:44,924 You take it back, I'm deactivating my service. 204 00:11:45,135 --> 00:11:48,161 I quit, I quit. Thanks for everything, all right, but l... 205 00:11:50,574 --> 00:11:51,563 Yeah. 206 00:11:57,848 --> 00:12:01,375 You... This is not... 207 00:12:04,588 --> 00:12:05,850 Don't be mean. 208 00:12:09,426 --> 00:12:10,484 Nice hat. 209 00:12:11,228 --> 00:12:13,526 No, no, no. 210 00:12:16,566 --> 00:12:20,935 Get away from me. Just get away. Get away. Leave me alone. 211 00:12:21,138 --> 00:12:24,972 Is this a stickup? Or are you just happy? 212 00:12:26,910 --> 00:12:28,741 Yeah? I'm gonna take my clothes off, then... 213 00:12:28,945 --> 00:12:30,537 I wouldn't do that if I were you. 214 00:12:30,747 --> 00:12:33,580 There's only one place left for it to pop up. 215 00:12:35,118 --> 00:12:38,713 Oh. No, no, I don't want that. Come on, man. 216 00:12:38,922 --> 00:12:43,120 I told you, this item is nonreturnable. 217 00:12:44,327 --> 00:12:47,319 - Come on, just take it. - Until we meet again. 218 00:12:47,531 --> 00:12:52,434 Don't do that. Come on, Morty. How do I get it to stop fast-forwarding? 219 00:12:55,205 --> 00:12:57,605 Morning, sweetie. 220 00:12:58,742 --> 00:13:00,369 You wanna shower first? 221 00:13:00,577 --> 00:13:04,308 Yeah. No! I can't shower because then I'll fast-forward. 222 00:13:04,514 --> 00:13:07,312 And if I fast-forward, who knows how long I'll fast-forward for. 223 00:13:07,517 --> 00:13:10,418 How's this? I'm gonna rough it today, like in the Old West. Okay? 224 00:13:10,620 --> 00:13:13,214 Donna, I wanna tell you what's going on right now so bad... 225 00:13:13,423 --> 00:13:16,722 ...but it might lead to an argument. We can't argue because off I'll go. 226 00:13:16,927 --> 00:13:18,554 So just know there is a problem. 227 00:13:18,762 --> 00:13:21,560 I tried to get rid of the problem, it almost ended up in my ass. 228 00:13:21,765 --> 00:13:23,858 I'm gonna go to work and try to figure this out. 229 00:13:24,067 --> 00:13:25,694 You're going to work in your bathrobe? 230 00:13:25,902 --> 00:13:27,961 Honey. We can't argue, okay? No more arguing. 231 00:13:28,171 --> 00:13:30,605 You're right. I'm wrong. All the time. You want a kiss? 232 00:13:30,807 --> 00:13:33,503 - I'll take a kiss. - I can't. If I give you a kiss... 233 00:13:33,710 --> 00:13:36,611 ...it might lead to something else, then... three minutes goes by. 234 00:13:36,813 --> 00:13:38,974 You're laying there disappointed, I'm smiling. 235 00:13:39,182 --> 00:13:42,481 I wanna be with you every minute of my life, that's why I gotta leave now. 236 00:13:42,686 --> 00:13:44,278 Have a great day! 237 00:13:44,488 --> 00:13:48,982 Once again, Michael left Donna in bed confused and unsatisfied. 238 00:13:49,192 --> 00:13:50,784 Shut up, James Earl Jones! 239 00:13:50,994 --> 00:13:53,929 No, you shut up, big mouth! 240 00:14:46,783 --> 00:14:48,717 Michael! 241 00:14:48,919 --> 00:14:50,716 Mr. Ammer is here 242 00:14:51,388 --> 00:14:55,222 Your first day as a partner, you come to work in a fricking bathrobe? 243 00:14:55,425 --> 00:14:57,916 I did. I did. 244 00:14:58,128 --> 00:15:01,586 John, I just feel we should stop wasting our energy... 245 00:15:01,798 --> 00:15:05,063 ...on corporate brown-nosing and worrying who's got the better suit. 246 00:15:05,268 --> 00:15:07,862 Armani, Calvin Klein, who cares? 247 00:15:08,071 --> 00:15:11,234 Let's concentrate on what really matters, the work. 248 00:15:13,310 --> 00:15:15,574 That's the craziest thing I've ever heard. 249 00:15:17,647 --> 00:15:19,911 But goddamn it, you're right. 250 00:15:23,653 --> 00:15:27,054 Life-changing. I feel freer. 251 00:15:27,390 --> 00:15:28,755 Yeah... Keep the pants on. 252 00:15:29,559 --> 00:15:31,720 Sexual harassment, eh? 253 00:15:32,362 --> 00:15:34,262 Speaking of life-changing... 254 00:15:34,464 --> 00:15:39,458 ...there's something, or actually someone, I'd like to talk to you about. 255 00:15:41,071 --> 00:15:42,902 - Janine. - Everything okay? 256 00:15:43,106 --> 00:15:45,734 Michael, Janine and I decided to drop out of the rat race... 257 00:15:45,942 --> 00:15:47,307 ...slow down, move to Morocco. 258 00:15:47,510 --> 00:15:50,035 - Morocco? - Morocco. 259 00:15:50,714 --> 00:15:51,681 Okay. 260 00:15:51,881 --> 00:15:54,714 Eric Lamensoff will assume my day-to-day responsibilities... 261 00:15:54,918 --> 00:15:57,079 ...and I'd like you to take his job. 262 00:15:57,854 --> 00:16:02,518 But Eric Lamensoff is the head of the whole international division. 263 00:16:02,726 --> 00:16:04,717 - I've been your partner one day. - So? 264 00:16:04,928 --> 00:16:07,692 Every account you worked on turned into gold. 265 00:16:07,897 --> 00:16:09,455 You know, I wouldn't be surprised... 266 00:16:09,666 --> 00:16:11,964 ...if one day you ended up being our CEO. 267 00:16:13,103 --> 00:16:15,901 Hey, I would love for that to happen, but... 268 00:16:16,106 --> 00:16:19,075 No! No, no, no! I don't want a promotion! 269 00:16:19,275 --> 00:16:22,108 No! 270 00:16:26,683 --> 00:16:29,481 Michael, you have a phone call. 271 00:16:29,686 --> 00:16:30,778 Michael Newman. 272 00:16:34,491 --> 00:16:35,617 Word up, big guy. 273 00:16:35,825 --> 00:16:39,283 Ten years ago you told me you wanted to be CEO. 274 00:16:39,496 --> 00:16:42,829 Great news. Eric Lamensoff killed himself. 275 00:16:43,033 --> 00:16:45,627 So you better stop with the junk food, Mr. Chairman... 276 00:16:45,835 --> 00:16:48,167 ...or you'll end up killing yourself too. 277 00:16:51,741 --> 00:16:54,107 Opening virtual blinds. 278 00:16:54,310 --> 00:16:58,940 Ten years? How much worse can things get? 279 00:17:14,764 --> 00:17:17,289 Oh, my God, I'm a fat guy! 280 00:17:17,500 --> 00:17:18,967 Look at me. 281 00:17:25,041 --> 00:17:27,942 What is this? This is titties. 282 00:17:28,645 --> 00:17:30,670 I got juicy titties! 283 00:17:30,880 --> 00:17:32,609 What... What is that? 284 00:17:32,816 --> 00:17:36,547 Oh, God, no. 285 00:17:37,087 --> 00:17:38,577 Just take me home. 286 00:17:45,361 --> 00:17:48,728 This is 1010 WINS news. February 5th, 2017. 287 00:17:48,932 --> 00:17:51,196 Britney Spears had her 23rd baby today. 288 00:17:51,401 --> 00:17:54,768 Proud father Kevin Federline says he's now considering getting a job. 289 00:17:54,971 --> 00:17:58,304 Also, Michael Jackson, the first man to clone himself... 290 00:17:58,508 --> 00:18:01,204 ...is now suing himself for molesting himself. 291 00:18:15,024 --> 00:18:16,423 Donna! 292 00:18:17,327 --> 00:18:19,056 Donna! 293 00:18:28,238 --> 00:18:29,296 Can I help you? 294 00:18:30,840 --> 00:18:34,503 - Hey, Dad. - "Hey, Dad"? 295 00:18:34,711 --> 00:18:37,646 Ben? That's you? 296 00:18:37,847 --> 00:18:40,941 Look how big you got. You're enormous. 297 00:18:41,518 --> 00:18:45,284 Look who's talking, Captain Twinkie of the S.S. Fat-Ass! 298 00:18:45,488 --> 00:18:46,978 Really good for my self-esteem. 299 00:18:47,190 --> 00:18:49,590 Maybe if you would take me to Pilates like you said... 300 00:18:49,793 --> 00:18:51,818 ...people wouldn't think I was Rosie O'Donnell! 301 00:18:52,028 --> 00:18:53,552 Come on, I love you! 302 00:18:53,763 --> 00:18:56,596 - Bring me back the Twinkies! - You're so cruel! 303 00:18:56,800 --> 00:18:59,166 Will you please stop yelling? It is so embarrassing. 304 00:18:59,369 --> 00:19:02,463 - Is that my daughter? - Mom, I'm going to Derek's! 305 00:19:02,672 --> 00:19:06,233 That's you, Samantha? When did you get boobs? 306 00:19:06,576 --> 00:19:09,170 The same time you did, Dad. Now can I go? 307 00:19:09,379 --> 00:19:11,609 Whoa, whoa, whoa. Who the hell's this Derek guy? 308 00:19:11,815 --> 00:19:14,978 My boyfriend, the hottest boy in school, hello? 309 00:19:15,185 --> 00:19:17,153 He's gonna be hot when I burn his house down. 310 00:19:17,353 --> 00:19:19,321 Get your ass upstairs, put normal clothes on. 311 00:19:19,522 --> 00:19:22,355 - Why are you so mean to me? - Get them on now! 312 00:19:22,559 --> 00:19:24,618 - And wipe off all that makeup! - Right! 313 00:19:27,096 --> 00:19:28,757 Is Peanut dead too? 314 00:19:29,966 --> 00:19:32,526 This one's got the duck doing all the work. 315 00:19:35,371 --> 00:19:37,100 Donna. Donna. 316 00:19:38,708 --> 00:19:40,198 Goddamn it. 317 00:19:40,410 --> 00:19:43,470 Look how gorgeous you look. I'm so scared. 318 00:19:43,680 --> 00:19:46,740 - Knock, knock, gang. - Hey, sweetie. 319 00:19:52,755 --> 00:19:53,915 What's going on? 320 00:19:54,123 --> 00:19:55,886 Donna and I were gonna get hot chocolate. 321 00:19:56,092 --> 00:19:58,322 - You want us to bring you one? - You cheating on me? 322 00:19:58,528 --> 00:20:00,120 With Johnny G-String over here? 323 00:20:00,330 --> 00:20:02,389 Come on. Time-out. I thought we were past that. 324 00:20:02,599 --> 00:20:05,830 No, no, no, we're past this argument. No, you're right, no big deal. 325 00:20:06,035 --> 00:20:08,799 Hey, it's just that you don't mess with another man's wife! 326 00:20:09,005 --> 00:20:10,973 Michael! Stop it! Stop it, Michael! 327 00:20:11,174 --> 00:20:13,142 It was your decision to move out! So stay out! 328 00:20:13,343 --> 00:20:15,072 Get off me! You sticking up for him? 329 00:20:15,278 --> 00:20:17,906 Go away! Go away, I hate you! 330 00:20:18,114 --> 00:20:20,639 - We can't argue! Donna, please! - I hate you! I hate you! 331 00:20:21,684 --> 00:20:23,083 Oh, man! 332 00:20:23,286 --> 00:20:25,311 You hate me? 333 00:20:28,358 --> 00:20:32,124 No. No. 334 00:20:32,328 --> 00:20:34,888 Ten years, you're not finished yet? 335 00:20:35,265 --> 00:20:40,032 Morty! Why did you do this to me? 336 00:20:40,236 --> 00:20:42,500 You did this to yourself, Michael. 337 00:20:42,705 --> 00:20:45,105 No. No, I didn't wanna waste all that time. 338 00:20:45,308 --> 00:20:46,707 I didn't wanna lose Donna! 339 00:20:46,910 --> 00:20:48,639 The remote goes by your behavior. 340 00:20:48,845 --> 00:20:52,337 Every time you had a conflict between work and home, work won. 341 00:20:52,548 --> 00:20:54,038 - No, not true. - Lie to your wife. 342 00:20:54,250 --> 00:20:56,844 Lie to yourself. But you cannot lie to the remote. 343 00:20:57,053 --> 00:21:00,955 The remote is lie-proof, so you can't change what already happened. 344 00:21:01,157 --> 00:21:03,091 But you're still a young man. 345 00:21:03,293 --> 00:21:05,955 A young, fat man. You could win Donna back. 346 00:21:06,162 --> 00:21:08,221 So that's what I'll do. 347 00:21:08,431 --> 00:21:10,228 Go for it, tubs. 348 00:21:11,167 --> 00:21:15,570 I saw what you did to the duck. Very good. Nice work. 349 00:21:31,554 --> 00:21:33,249 You'll feel that in a second. 350 00:21:33,723 --> 00:21:37,022 All right, please, please just read my note. 351 00:21:37,226 --> 00:21:39,990 - Hate you! I hate you! I hate you! 352 00:21:50,707 --> 00:21:52,868 Michael, are you awake? 353 00:21:54,210 --> 00:21:57,805 Michael, honey. Are you awake? 354 00:21:59,816 --> 00:22:01,716 Donna. 355 00:22:04,354 --> 00:22:06,822 Where'd all my fat go? 356 00:22:09,492 --> 00:22:13,087 It was just a dream? A terrible, terrible dream. 357 00:22:13,296 --> 00:22:15,321 What's that, Michael? You had a bad dream? 358 00:22:15,531 --> 00:22:17,829 Did a fuzzy dog push me over? 359 00:22:19,736 --> 00:22:21,931 Oh, Shaggy the miracle dog? 360 00:22:22,138 --> 00:22:24,231 Yeah, if he hadn't knocked you on your noggin... 361 00:22:24,440 --> 00:22:27,841 ...you wouldn't have had the CAT scan that found the cancer before it spread. 362 00:22:28,044 --> 00:22:29,477 I have cancer? 363 00:22:29,679 --> 00:22:31,510 No, you had cancer. 364 00:22:31,714 --> 00:22:33,944 You're the only person to gain weight during chemo. 365 00:22:34,150 --> 00:22:36,141 That's probably what caused your heart attack. 366 00:22:36,352 --> 00:22:37,614 Heart attack? 367 00:22:37,820 --> 00:22:39,811 I thought they weaned you off the morphine. 368 00:22:40,556 --> 00:22:42,183 Okay, Mr. Junk Food... 369 00:22:42,392 --> 00:22:44,986 ...since the injury, you haven't been healthy a full day. 370 00:22:45,194 --> 00:22:47,560 When exactly did I hurt my head? 371 00:22:48,531 --> 00:22:51,898 When was it? Like, six years ago? 372 00:22:52,101 --> 00:22:57,471 Six more years! No! No! It skipped all my sickness. 373 00:22:57,673 --> 00:22:59,641 I'm gonna ask them to cut back on painkillers. 374 00:22:59,842 --> 00:23:01,400 Donna, don't go. 375 00:23:03,079 --> 00:23:04,740 What's this? 376 00:23:07,283 --> 00:23:11,310 That's not bad for your third liposuction. 377 00:23:12,555 --> 00:23:14,420 One more tummy tuck should take care of it. 378 00:23:15,491 --> 00:23:18,221 Oh, it looks like a tongue... 379 00:23:18,428 --> 00:23:20,020 ...licking. 380 00:23:21,130 --> 00:23:24,588 Look, I should go. Bill's waiting for me downstairs. 381 00:23:24,801 --> 00:23:26,701 - So I'll probably... - Bill? 382 00:23:26,903 --> 00:23:29,269 You're still with Speedo Torpedo? 383 00:23:29,472 --> 00:23:32,100 Whatever happened to "forever and ever," honey? 384 00:23:32,308 --> 00:23:34,435 "Forever and ever"? 385 00:23:34,644 --> 00:23:37,977 Look, Michael, I'm trying to have a civilized relationship with you... 386 00:23:38,181 --> 00:23:39,512 ...for the kids' sake. 387 00:23:39,715 --> 00:23:42,343 I really wanna be friends, but I can't do that if you... 388 00:23:42,552 --> 00:23:44,213 Would you stop flapping that thing? 389 00:23:44,420 --> 00:23:47,184 It's my flap, I'll do whatever the hell I want with it! 390 00:23:49,092 --> 00:23:50,116 You done? 391 00:23:52,095 --> 00:23:54,256 Look, Bill's my husband. 392 00:23:54,464 --> 00:23:57,262 Please learn to accept that. I really have to go. 393 00:23:57,467 --> 00:23:59,799 Husband? Donna? 394 00:24:00,002 --> 00:24:05,599 No. Donna. Donna. Donna! 395 00:24:06,175 --> 00:24:08,837 Welcome to Newman Architecture. 396 00:24:09,045 --> 00:24:11,673 Building a better world for all of us. 397 00:24:11,881 --> 00:24:14,042 Architect of the year, 2018. 398 00:24:14,250 --> 00:24:16,775 All your dreams came true, huh, moron? 399 00:24:16,986 --> 00:24:19,819 Dad. Hey, how you feeling? 400 00:24:21,724 --> 00:24:25,387 - Benjamin. Look at that. - Look... What? 401 00:24:25,595 --> 00:24:29,759 Your face. Your skinny face. You're shaving now, huh, kid? 402 00:24:29,966 --> 00:24:34,494 Your entire ass is gone. What happened? Good for you. 403 00:24:34,704 --> 00:24:39,141 Right, my ass. Why don't we talk about it in my office. 404 00:24:41,978 --> 00:24:44,139 My old office. 405 00:24:47,383 --> 00:24:50,580 The architect. How did this happen? 406 00:24:50,786 --> 00:24:54,847 - Mom said you were still a little loopy. - No, no, no. I'm feeling terrific. 407 00:24:55,057 --> 00:24:58,652 The weight. How did you do it? Staple treatment like your old man? 408 00:24:58,861 --> 00:25:00,920 Wanna have a flap fight? You gotta see this... 409 00:25:01,130 --> 00:25:04,622 No. Just working out with Bill five times a week. Same as always. 410 00:25:09,939 --> 00:25:15,241 That's a looker. Blondie, big lips. Chesty. 411 00:25:15,444 --> 00:25:16,672 Is that your girl? 412 00:25:17,480 --> 00:25:19,505 No, that's your daughter Samantha. 413 00:25:19,949 --> 00:25:21,382 Of course it is. 414 00:25:21,584 --> 00:25:24,212 And you better always take care of her... 415 00:25:24,420 --> 00:25:28,220 ...and make sure nobody touches her except you. 416 00:25:29,158 --> 00:25:32,286 Pop, I'm just getting ready for this meeting. 417 00:25:33,696 --> 00:25:36,722 Okay. Absolutely. I'll take off for you. 418 00:25:38,668 --> 00:25:42,536 I'd like to spend more time together. All of us. 419 00:25:42,738 --> 00:25:44,797 Take you out for ice cream. How's that? 420 00:25:45,174 --> 00:25:47,039 I know your mother won't come... 421 00:25:47,243 --> 00:25:51,373 ...but you, Samantha, Grandpa, Grandma. 422 00:25:51,781 --> 00:25:53,078 That'd be nice, huh? 423 00:25:54,717 --> 00:25:57,151 I knew something was funny with you today. 424 00:25:57,353 --> 00:26:00,880 Papa, take a seat. Let me get you a water, okay? 425 00:26:02,225 --> 00:26:04,352 What are we sitting for? 426 00:26:05,595 --> 00:26:09,531 - Here you go, Pop, drink this. - All right. Drink some water. 427 00:26:11,534 --> 00:26:13,331 There, I had my water. What's going on? 428 00:26:16,639 --> 00:26:18,402 Grandpa died, Dad. 429 00:26:21,544 --> 00:26:23,774 He died a while back now. 430 00:26:28,217 --> 00:26:32,278 No, no, no. 431 00:26:32,488 --> 00:26:34,854 Don't say that. 432 00:26:35,658 --> 00:26:38,388 Where was I? 433 00:26:38,594 --> 00:26:39,891 You're crying? 434 00:26:40,997 --> 00:26:43,090 What happened? 435 00:26:44,133 --> 00:26:48,797 Nothing. You know, he just got old. That's life. 436 00:26:49,005 --> 00:26:52,873 - Shit. - You're born and you live and you die. 437 00:26:54,210 --> 00:26:55,507 Man, I gotta go. 438 00:26:55,711 --> 00:26:57,838 Hey, hang on. Susie, push my next meeting. 439 00:26:58,047 --> 00:27:00,311 No, no, do your meeting. It's fine. I'm just dizzy. 440 00:27:00,516 --> 00:27:03,246 - Why are you crying? - I'm dizzy from the operation. 441 00:27:03,452 --> 00:27:07,115 - You're gonna make me cry, Dad. - You don't... You don't have to go. 442 00:27:11,360 --> 00:27:13,624 You look... You look good. 443 00:27:13,829 --> 00:27:15,729 It's all right. Goodbye. 444 00:27:30,880 --> 00:27:32,541 Come on. 445 00:27:32,748 --> 00:27:34,079 Come on. 446 00:27:34,283 --> 00:27:36,342 It won't take you there. 447 00:27:36,886 --> 00:27:38,353 Take me where? 448 00:27:39,121 --> 00:27:41,954 To the moment he died. You weren't there. 449 00:27:42,358 --> 00:27:44,417 Of course I wasn't. 450 00:27:46,162 --> 00:27:48,494 Can you take me to the last time I saw him, please? 451 00:27:52,101 --> 00:27:55,628 Hey, Dad. Sorry to bug you. 452 00:27:55,838 --> 00:27:59,205 Would you mind looking at my shopping mall design again? 453 00:27:59,408 --> 00:28:00,670 This one is cheaper. 454 00:28:00,876 --> 00:28:03,902 But if you check this out... 455 00:28:04,113 --> 00:28:07,139 ...you'll see it has a much better natural flow... 456 00:28:07,350 --> 00:28:10,376 Cheaper one, like I said. Now, just let me do my e-mail. 457 00:28:12,355 --> 00:28:14,448 Yeah. Yeah, you're right, Dad. 458 00:28:14,657 --> 00:28:17,626 He ain't right. You're a schmuck! Look at it! 459 00:28:18,160 --> 00:28:19,149 Surprise. 460 00:28:19,362 --> 00:28:21,694 Hey, Grandpa. 461 00:28:22,131 --> 00:28:24,656 Oh, my God. 462 00:28:28,471 --> 00:28:30,962 When did you get so handsome? 463 00:28:31,173 --> 00:28:33,573 So, Michael, I had a wonderful idea. 464 00:28:33,776 --> 00:28:36,176 Your mother's playing canasta with her friends tonight. 465 00:28:36,379 --> 00:28:38,745 I thought, "What a great opportunity." 466 00:28:38,948 --> 00:28:42,008 You, me and Ben should go and have a boys' night out. 467 00:28:42,218 --> 00:28:44,652 - Can't. - What do you mean you can't? 468 00:28:44,854 --> 00:28:46,014 You have to eat sometime. 469 00:28:46,222 --> 00:28:48,622 We could go, we could whistle at pretty girls. 470 00:28:48,824 --> 00:28:51,088 - I'm down for that. - See? He's down. 471 00:28:51,293 --> 00:28:53,352 I don't know what it means, but he's down. 472 00:28:53,562 --> 00:28:56,998 - Hey. Please. - Don't give me that finger. 473 00:29:02,037 --> 00:29:04,164 I'll make you a deal. 474 00:29:04,373 --> 00:29:08,707 If you come, I'll show you the quarter trick. 475 00:29:08,911 --> 00:29:11,277 - Will you look at the man? - I'll tell you the secret. 476 00:29:11,480 --> 00:29:13,380 No, Dad. 477 00:29:13,582 --> 00:29:14,844 Don't you wanna know how l...? 478 00:29:15,050 --> 00:29:17,518 I know how you do the stupid trick. I've always known. 479 00:29:17,720 --> 00:29:19,017 Can you let me do my work? 480 00:29:23,592 --> 00:29:25,253 You've always known. 481 00:29:25,461 --> 00:29:26,928 You're pathetic. 482 00:29:27,930 --> 00:29:29,454 Okay. 483 00:29:32,134 --> 00:29:34,694 I'm so sorry I barged in. 484 00:29:35,104 --> 00:29:37,197 I love you, son. 485 00:29:40,009 --> 00:29:41,874 See you later, Grandpa, I love you. 486 00:29:42,077 --> 00:29:43,669 Dad. 487 00:29:44,346 --> 00:29:46,109 Pop. 488 00:29:46,315 --> 00:29:48,010 Pop. 489 00:30:12,074 --> 00:30:14,133 I love you, son. 490 00:30:18,147 --> 00:30:20,206 I love you, son. 491 00:30:21,917 --> 00:30:23,942 I love you, son. 492 00:30:29,925 --> 00:30:32,120 I love you too, Dad. 493 00:30:37,399 --> 00:30:39,196 I'll miss you. 494 00:30:41,570 --> 00:30:42,935 You know that. 495 00:30:46,609 --> 00:30:48,270 Goodbye. 496 00:31:14,103 --> 00:31:16,469 I'm sorry about your father. 497 00:31:16,906 --> 00:31:20,865 Taking him wasn't something I wanted to do. 498 00:31:21,610 --> 00:31:23,043 What do you mean "taking him"? 499 00:31:23,245 --> 00:31:24,837 I'm an angel, Michael. 500 00:31:25,381 --> 00:31:27,042 An angel? 501 00:31:27,950 --> 00:31:30,475 I thought an angel was supposed to protect people. 502 00:31:30,686 --> 00:31:32,745 I'm the angel of death. 503 00:31:34,690 --> 00:31:37,488 Your dad, it was his time. 504 00:31:39,094 --> 00:31:41,062 You bastard. 505 00:31:48,804 --> 00:31:50,669 All right, leave me alone. Leave me alone. 506 00:31:50,873 --> 00:31:54,331 You had your fun. Just take me to a good place. 507 00:32:10,326 --> 00:32:14,922 And now, everybody, it's time for Mr. Newman to say a few words. 508 00:32:15,531 --> 00:32:17,089 Yay, Michael! 509 00:32:19,134 --> 00:32:21,898 Go get them, Michael! Speech! 510 00:32:24,707 --> 00:32:27,198 Wedding cake. Wedding cake. 511 00:32:27,977 --> 00:32:30,775 Okay, where's the groom? Show your face. 512 00:32:30,980 --> 00:32:32,572 Hi, Dad. 513 00:32:33,282 --> 00:32:36,911 Ben. I didn't miss my son's wedding. 514 00:32:37,119 --> 00:32:41,556 Wow, this is terrific, buddy. Who's the lucky lady? 515 00:32:42,191 --> 00:32:44,785 Very funny, Mr. Newman. 516 00:32:47,663 --> 00:32:49,130 Aunt Peggy, is that you? 517 00:32:50,699 --> 00:32:52,633 God, you got old. 518 00:32:54,603 --> 00:32:59,939 No, no. L... She... I'm just playing. She knows that. 519 00:33:05,781 --> 00:33:07,078 Ma. 520 00:33:11,186 --> 00:33:13,586 Ben's wife... 521 00:33:14,223 --> 00:33:15,485 ...welcome to the family. 522 00:33:15,691 --> 00:33:16,851 Thank you. 523 00:33:17,059 --> 00:33:19,857 Congratulations. Let's have the best night, okay? 524 00:33:29,838 --> 00:33:34,434 Look at you, Ma. You look amazing. 525 00:33:36,111 --> 00:33:39,774 Michael, you haven't kissed me like that since you were a little boy. 526 00:33:39,982 --> 00:33:43,315 You are the best, Ma. You know I know that, right? 527 00:33:43,519 --> 00:33:46,682 Oh, darling, that's so sweet. 528 00:33:47,356 --> 00:33:51,156 You know, Michael, your father would've loved to be here. 529 00:33:51,360 --> 00:33:52,827 I know, Ma. 530 00:33:53,696 --> 00:33:56,722 Okay? I'm just glad you're here. 531 00:33:57,499 --> 00:34:02,869 Me too, bubbala. Me too. Me too. It's beautiful. Beautiful. 532 00:34:03,338 --> 00:34:04,703 Beautiful. Look at her. 533 00:34:05,374 --> 00:34:07,365 Donna, my favorite. 534 00:34:08,210 --> 00:34:10,542 You're such a schmuck for letting her go. 535 00:34:10,746 --> 00:34:13,840 But don't let me ruin your evening. I'll talk to you later. 536 00:34:14,049 --> 00:34:16,017 Christina. 537 00:34:18,821 --> 00:34:21,654 Michael, you've been so generous taking care of all this... 538 00:34:21,857 --> 00:34:23,017 ...and the kids' honeymoon. 539 00:34:23,225 --> 00:34:25,318 - Absolutely. - Thank you so much. 540 00:34:25,527 --> 00:34:29,725 Of course. Ben's wife seems like a nice kid, huh? 541 00:34:29,932 --> 00:34:32,867 - I think she's wonderful. - Definite keeper. 542 00:34:33,068 --> 00:34:36,595 Here's one you might remember from The Cranberries. 543 00:34:41,944 --> 00:34:44,538 Out of all the songs, huh? 544 00:34:46,181 --> 00:34:48,115 Bill, since it's our son's wedding... 545 00:34:48,317 --> 00:34:51,218 ...do you mind if I dance with my ex-husband for a minute? 546 00:34:51,420 --> 00:34:53,684 - Not at all. - Thank you. 547 00:34:53,889 --> 00:34:56,449 Just have her back by midnight, all right, champ? 548 00:34:56,658 --> 00:34:57,852 You got it, Bill. 549 00:35:10,105 --> 00:35:12,471 Why does he have a bathing suit on? 550 00:35:14,176 --> 00:35:16,337 Nice Speedo, buddy. 551 00:35:28,357 --> 00:35:30,222 Still smelling good, huh? 552 00:35:30,425 --> 00:35:32,916 After all these years. 553 00:35:34,630 --> 00:35:36,097 Are you happy? 554 00:35:36,298 --> 00:35:39,028 Of course I'm happy, our son just got married. 555 00:35:39,234 --> 00:35:43,898 Not about that. Are you happy about where our lives ended up? 556 00:35:44,106 --> 00:35:46,973 "Ended." It's not over yet. 557 00:35:47,176 --> 00:35:50,839 - That's my Donna. - It's true. 558 00:35:52,347 --> 00:35:53,974 That Samantha? 559 00:35:54,583 --> 00:35:58,917 Hey. What are you doing? Put a sweater on. Cover them up. 560 00:35:59,922 --> 00:36:01,321 What is with you? 561 00:36:03,292 --> 00:36:05,157 Just kidding, I... 562 00:36:05,360 --> 00:36:08,193 Just not used to seeing you all grown-up like this. 563 00:36:09,198 --> 00:36:14,135 Okay, well, if that's your way of telling me that I look pretty, then thank you. 564 00:36:14,670 --> 00:36:16,103 Let's go get some cake. 565 00:36:16,305 --> 00:36:18,205 - I'll race you there, Dad. Come on. - Okay. 566 00:36:19,908 --> 00:36:21,535 "Dad"? 567 00:36:24,046 --> 00:36:25,343 Michael, are you okay? 568 00:36:27,950 --> 00:36:31,477 Is there a doctor? We need a doctor here! 569 00:36:34,590 --> 00:36:35,887 Michael! 570 00:36:36,091 --> 00:36:38,855 - Dad! - Dad! 571 00:36:40,863 --> 00:36:42,558 It's just corn flakes. 572 00:37:07,890 --> 00:37:10,654 One dance, you pop an artery. 573 00:37:11,927 --> 00:37:16,057 Why'd you make me waste my entire life? 574 00:37:16,265 --> 00:37:18,358 You were fast-forwarding through your life... 575 00:37:18,567 --> 00:37:20,933 ...Iong before you ever met me. 576 00:37:21,136 --> 00:37:23,195 You lived the life you chose, big shot. 577 00:37:24,072 --> 00:37:26,165 This is not the life I wanted. 578 00:37:26,375 --> 00:37:27,774 It is. 579 00:37:33,015 --> 00:37:34,209 Looks like it is. 580 00:37:38,086 --> 00:37:41,214 Hey. You're up. How you feeling? 581 00:37:43,158 --> 00:37:46,093 I feel better now that you guys are here. 582 00:37:46,295 --> 00:37:48,559 Samantha's been here like 36 hours straight. 583 00:37:48,764 --> 00:37:52,131 She said she wouldn't leave the hospital until you woke up. 584 00:37:53,101 --> 00:37:57,128 - Why'd you do that? - Because. You're my father. 585 00:37:57,739 --> 00:38:00,207 I thought Bill was your father. 586 00:38:00,943 --> 00:38:03,070 I have two fathers. 587 00:38:04,046 --> 00:38:08,710 One of them told me he was gonna live till he was 200. Remember? 588 00:38:10,619 --> 00:38:13,053 You both really need to get some sleep. 589 00:38:13,255 --> 00:38:15,450 And I got a plane to catch. 590 00:38:16,191 --> 00:38:18,887 Big Ben's gotta go on his honeymoon. 591 00:38:19,561 --> 00:38:22,155 Actually, I just canceled the honeymoon. 592 00:38:22,364 --> 00:38:26,232 Kensington deal might fall through, so I gotta go do damage control. 593 00:38:26,435 --> 00:38:28,232 - Julie and I can go to Italy anytime. - No. 594 00:38:28,437 --> 00:38:29,665 It's not that big a deal. 595 00:38:29,871 --> 00:38:32,101 - That's not fair to your wife. - Dad... 596 00:38:32,307 --> 00:38:35,242 ...she gets it. Keeping the business going is more important. 597 00:38:35,444 --> 00:38:38,208 Guys, I'm sorry. You're gonna have to leave. He needs his rest. 598 00:38:38,413 --> 00:38:39,573 All right. Bye, Dad. 599 00:38:40,882 --> 00:38:42,645 Bye, Daddy. 600 00:38:54,096 --> 00:38:55,859 Get this off of me. 601 00:39:00,402 --> 00:39:02,131 Whoa, whoa! 602 00:39:02,337 --> 00:39:04,862 Hey, fella, you're a long way from walking out of here. 603 00:39:05,073 --> 00:39:06,540 I gotta see my son. 604 00:39:06,742 --> 00:39:09,142 You're not going anywhere. Now, get back into the bed. 605 00:39:09,911 --> 00:39:11,970 - Isn't that Colin Farrell? - Where? 606 00:39:18,053 --> 00:39:19,418 Michael. 607 00:39:19,621 --> 00:39:23,057 Those machines are keeping you alive. 608 00:39:23,258 --> 00:39:25,726 I gotta talk to my boy. 609 00:39:32,667 --> 00:39:34,897 - Michael, stop. - No. 610 00:39:37,639 --> 00:39:40,631 Michael, it doesn't have to end now. 611 00:39:49,284 --> 00:39:51,218 Ben! 612 00:40:03,365 --> 00:40:04,559 Ben! 613 00:40:13,308 --> 00:40:16,106 Ben! 614 00:40:18,046 --> 00:40:21,447 Ben! 615 00:40:23,985 --> 00:40:26,044 Dad? Dad? 616 00:40:26,621 --> 00:40:28,612 Dad, what are you doing? 617 00:40:28,824 --> 00:40:30,951 Are you okay? 618 00:40:31,660 --> 00:40:35,221 - Oh, my God. - Help! Help! 619 00:40:35,430 --> 00:40:37,421 - Dad! Dad! - Help! 620 00:40:37,632 --> 00:40:39,190 Ben, Ben. 621 00:40:43,271 --> 00:40:46,035 Family. Family. Family. 622 00:40:46,241 --> 00:40:47,299 What? 623 00:40:47,509 --> 00:40:51,878 Family. Family. Family comes first. 624 00:40:52,447 --> 00:40:54,142 Family comes first. 625 00:40:54,349 --> 00:40:56,476 Honeymoon. Honeymoon. 626 00:40:56,952 --> 00:41:00,115 Honeymoon. I love you. 627 00:41:01,923 --> 00:41:04,448 Samantha. Samantha. 628 00:41:04,659 --> 00:41:08,959 I didn't make 200, but I love you. 629 00:41:09,164 --> 00:41:10,995 I love you. 630 00:41:11,733 --> 00:41:14,827 Bill, Bill, Bill. 631 00:41:40,362 --> 00:41:42,353 I'm sorry. 632 00:41:46,134 --> 00:41:47,601 Michael. 633 00:41:47,802 --> 00:41:51,966 The note you wrote her, it's in your pocket. 634 00:42:06,388 --> 00:42:09,050 Forever and ever, babe. 635 00:42:15,764 --> 00:42:17,231 It's time to go. 636 00:42:52,267 --> 00:42:56,363 - Where am I? - You're in Bed Bath & Beyond, sir. 637 00:42:56,571 --> 00:42:58,061 I was just watching you sleep. 638 00:42:58,273 --> 00:43:00,673 You looked like you were having a crazy dream. 639 00:43:00,875 --> 00:43:01,842 What? 640 00:43:02,043 --> 00:43:05,706 You're not supposed to lay in the beds, but I do sometimes. 641 00:43:08,683 --> 00:43:10,878 I'm back in the store? 642 00:43:14,422 --> 00:43:17,914 I'm young again. I'm young again. 643 00:43:18,126 --> 00:43:20,094 Well, I mean, you're not "young" young. 644 00:43:20,295 --> 00:43:22,126 I'm young. You're kind of on the back nine. 645 00:43:22,330 --> 00:43:25,629 No, no. No. I'm just teeing off, baby. 646 00:43:25,834 --> 00:43:27,267 Look at you. 647 00:43:27,469 --> 00:43:31,132 You want a friend? You want a friend? I'll be your friend, baby. 648 00:43:31,339 --> 00:43:33,933 I'll be your friend. I'll be your... 649 00:43:35,310 --> 00:43:37,676 Oh, my God! 650 00:43:41,182 --> 00:43:43,707 Yes, my crappy car! 651 00:43:43,918 --> 00:43:47,285 You mediocre, middle-class piece of shit! 652 00:43:47,489 --> 00:43:49,252 I love you! 653 00:43:58,433 --> 00:44:02,301 Pop, Pop. Pop. There he is. There he is. 654 00:44:02,504 --> 00:44:04,699 - What's wrong? What happened? - Nothing's wrong. 655 00:44:04,906 --> 00:44:07,841 Everything's incredible, Ma. I just wanted to tell you I love you. 656 00:44:08,043 --> 00:44:09,567 - I love you. - I love you so much. 657 00:44:09,778 --> 00:44:13,077 You gotta tell me how you do the quarter trick, it's driving me crazy. 658 00:44:13,281 --> 00:44:15,010 A magician never reveals his secrets. 659 00:44:15,216 --> 00:44:17,684 However, if you invite us over for dinner more... 660 00:44:17,886 --> 00:44:21,344 You come over tomorrow night, and the night after that. Any time you want. 661 00:44:21,556 --> 00:44:24,548 - Stop, I'm gonna have a heart attack. - No, I have the heart attacks. 662 00:44:24,759 --> 00:44:27,592 Thank you so much for giving birth to me, I know it hurt. Okay? 663 00:44:27,796 --> 00:44:31,254 You have no idea. But, honey, please, stay off the bong pipe. 664 00:44:31,466 --> 00:44:33,627 I can't promise you that. 665 00:44:35,270 --> 00:44:38,933 Okay. I'm up. 666 00:44:39,140 --> 00:44:40,903 What do you think? 667 00:44:42,110 --> 00:44:44,806 If you massage me first. 668 00:44:45,013 --> 00:44:47,106 Okay, let's go to sleep. 669 00:45:03,331 --> 00:45:07,392 Mom, wake up! There's a crazy noise downstairs. 670 00:45:11,339 --> 00:45:12,567 What the heck is going on? 671 00:45:13,041 --> 00:45:15,339 Hey, do you mind? I am trying to concentrate. 672 00:45:15,543 --> 00:45:17,272 Here I am, staying up all night... 673 00:45:17,479 --> 00:45:20,880 ...trying to come up with activities for our Fourth of July camping trip... 674 00:45:21,082 --> 00:45:22,379 ...but you won't let me think! 675 00:45:22,584 --> 00:45:26,680 You want time to think? Why don't you think about the fact that you just wo... 676 00:45:29,424 --> 00:45:30,550 What did you just say? 677 00:45:30,759 --> 00:45:33,592 Yes, you heard me. If you keep up this weird attitude... 678 00:45:33,795 --> 00:45:36,992 ...I won't be able to work for a year and have to plan 10 more vacations. 679 00:45:37,198 --> 00:45:39,826 - That make you happy? - Did you eat a bad Yodel? 680 00:45:40,034 --> 00:45:41,058 Give me those big lips. 681 00:45:43,338 --> 00:45:46,171 - What's going on down here? - Ben. Ben! 682 00:45:46,374 --> 00:45:47,739 Come here. Oh, my God. 683 00:45:47,942 --> 00:45:50,376 I missed you, I missed you. Look at you, boy. 684 00:45:50,578 --> 00:45:53,638 I'm gonna finish the tree house. We're gonna sleep in it next weekend. 685 00:45:53,848 --> 00:45:56,817 From now on, we're gonna exercise and I'm not gonna wear a Speedo. 686 00:45:57,018 --> 00:45:58,042 - All right! - All right. 687 00:45:58,253 --> 00:46:01,586 And you. Nice jump! I love you. 688 00:46:01,790 --> 00:46:04,520 One day, you are gonna be the hottest chick alive. 689 00:46:04,726 --> 00:46:06,125 But you still gotta have brains. 690 00:46:06,327 --> 00:46:08,227 So tomorrow I'm gonna teach you calculus. 691 00:46:08,430 --> 00:46:09,624 You know calculus? 692 00:46:09,831 --> 00:46:12,197 I knew you'd call me on that. Your mom will teach you. 693 00:46:12,400 --> 00:46:15,130 Now, get your rest, because tomorrow we're going camping! 694 00:46:15,336 --> 00:46:17,065 I know! It's gonna be the best! 695 00:46:17,272 --> 00:46:19,900 - Put a sweater on! Don't take it off! - Okay, Daddy. 696 00:46:20,108 --> 00:46:21,632 Oh, and Sundance! 697 00:46:21,843 --> 00:46:26,246 Doggie years go by very quick, so it's time to enjoy the real thing. 698 00:46:28,216 --> 00:46:30,480 Yeah, go get some, baby. 699 00:46:45,533 --> 00:46:48,502 What are you doing? What are you doing? 700 00:46:49,838 --> 00:46:52,807 No. Go to Sundance, not the duck. 701 00:46:58,279 --> 00:47:00,270 They told me at the pet store it was a female. 702 00:47:00,482 --> 00:47:01,847 They lied to me, I guess. 703 00:47:04,118 --> 00:47:07,315 - You staying downstairs tonight? - Why? That's getting you going? 704 00:47:08,423 --> 00:47:12,416 It's Fourth of July, I'm gonna celebrate with my wife. 705 00:47:12,627 --> 00:47:17,121 Take my time, massage her, make sure she is fully satisfied. 706 00:47:17,332 --> 00:47:21,268 But you know, it isn't the Fourth of July, it's only the second. 707 00:47:21,469 --> 00:47:24,961 That's even better. Happy second of July, honey. 708 00:47:25,173 --> 00:47:26,970 - Think I like this holiday. - Yeah? 709 00:47:27,175 --> 00:47:29,643 I'm gonna go change into my Pocahontas costume. 710 00:47:29,844 --> 00:47:33,644 - I'll see you upstairs. - I'll bring the duck. 711 00:47:33,848 --> 00:47:37,648 Okay, I gotta call my dad and tell him to get the old tent ready. 712 00:47:59,674 --> 00:48:02,905 "Like I said, 'Good guys need a break.' 713 00:48:03,678 --> 00:48:06,909 I know you'll do the right thing this time. 714 00:48:07,115 --> 00:48:09,583 Love, Morty. 715 00:48:10,051 --> 00:48:11,416 P. S: 716 00:48:11,619 --> 00:48:15,350 Your wife's rocking body still drives me crazy." 717 00:48:16,057 --> 00:48:18,184 Okay, Morty. 718 00:48:41,349 --> 00:48:43,874 Hey, who wants to have a pillow fight? 719 00:53:35,342 --> 00:53:37,401 Hi, Mr. Newman. 720 00:53:37,944 --> 00:53:40,208 Right this way, Michael. 721 00:53:41,515 --> 00:53:44,848 Hey, my new star. Congratulations. Sit down, big guy. 722 00:53:45,052 --> 00:53:46,610 All right. 723 00:53:46,820 --> 00:53:49,254 I am a little tired. 724 00:53:49,456 --> 00:53:51,788 The family was up late last night celebrating. 725 00:53:51,992 --> 00:53:54,825 You really knocked one out of the park last night, didn't you? 726 00:53:55,028 --> 00:53:56,154 Hey, you were great too. 727 00:53:56,363 --> 00:53:58,593 All you gotta do is draw up the construction plans. 728 00:53:58,799 --> 00:54:00,892 If Watsuhita commits to the bulk of the funds... 729 00:54:01,101 --> 00:54:03,399 ...I'm looking at my new partner. 730 00:54:06,406 --> 00:54:08,203 I thought I was already your partner. 731 00:54:08,942 --> 00:54:10,409 Whoa, cowboy. 732 00:54:10,610 --> 00:54:13,408 I said, "Land the Watsuhita account, you'll get promoted." 733 00:54:13,613 --> 00:54:18,016 - I didn't mean right this second. - But I already told my wife, sir. 734 00:54:18,218 --> 00:54:20,550 I spent money I don't have. 735 00:54:20,754 --> 00:54:23,655 To do these documents is gonna take me months. 736 00:54:24,324 --> 00:54:26,349 Then you better get started. 737 00:54:33,800 --> 00:54:35,665 Wow, I just got a big headache! 738 00:54:37,370 --> 00:54:40,396 - Was I hit by a train or something? - I didn't see anything. 739 00:54:40,607 --> 00:54:44,907 I forgot to tell you. I hung out with your friend Janine this weekend.