1 00:00:49,016 --> 00:00:51,101 /Toro! Toro! Toro! 2 00:00:54,688 --> 00:00:56,523 /Toro! Toro! Toro! 3 00:01:12,247 --> 00:01:15,709 - Whose idea was this, anyway? - They're gaining on us. 4 00:01:15,751 --> 00:01:17,503 /Andale! Andale! 5 00:01:25,636 --> 00:01:26,512 Yeah! Yeah! 6 00:01:32,101 --> 00:01:33,686 /Whoa! 7 00:01:41,026 --> 00:01:42,736 He's after me! 8 00:01:48,117 --> 00:01:49,451 Phil! 9 00:01:50,577 --> 00:01:52,663 - Whoa! - Whoa! 10 00:02:03,674 --> 00:02:05,050 Jesus! 11 00:02:16,312 --> 00:02:17,563 Ed! 12 00:02:17,688 --> 00:02:19,231 Go, Mitch! 13 00:02:26,822 --> 00:02:29,408 Stay, bull. Stay, bull. Stay, bull! 14 00:02:32,202 --> 00:02:34,079 Stop following me! 15 00:02:39,793 --> 00:02:41,211 Please! 16 00:05:24,667 --> 00:05:28,671 Does he know what he's doing? Has he any idea what he's doing? 17 00:05:28,712 --> 00:05:29,713 Ow. 18 00:05:29,713 --> 00:05:32,216 Relax. He's doing a beautiful job. 19 00:05:32,216 --> 00:05:35,094 Sir. El doctor. Hello! 20 00:05:36,887 --> 00:05:39,974 Don't sew up anything that's supposed to remain open, OK? 21 00:05:39,974 --> 00:05:41,225 Si. 22 00:05:44,311 --> 00:05:49,900 - What, are you taking pictures, Phil? - Are you kiddin'? This is a Kodak moment. Now, smile. 23 00:05:50,693 --> 00:05:52,778 Oh, good. Blind him with the flash. 24 00:05:52,778 --> 00:05:56,365 Phil, let the man keep what's left of his dignity, please. 25 00:05:56,782 --> 00:05:59,868 - "Dignity." This is all your fault, Ed. - My fault? 26 00:05:59,868 --> 00:06:03,831 - You're a macho lunatic. Phil & I are sheep. - We're not sheep. 27 00:06:03,872 --> 00:06:07,543 - We do every stupid thing he asks! - I didn't make you run. 28 00:06:08,252 --> 00:06:12,339 No, it was a 2,000lb rampaging animal spraying bull snot all over Spain. 29 00:06:12,339 --> 00:06:15,342 That's what made me run. You made me stand in front of it. 30 00:06:15,342 --> 00:06:17,553 Come on, guys. Group shot. 31 00:06:18,345 --> 00:06:20,848 I got a big "I told you so" coming from Barbara. 32 00:06:20,848 --> 00:06:22,933 Maybe she won't notice. 33 00:06:28,188 --> 00:06:31,734 - Honey, want a pillow? It's a long flight. - No, thanks. 34 00:06:33,193 --> 00:06:36,530 Come on, it's not that bad. I look like your mother. 35 00:06:38,949 --> 00:06:40,868 Here comes Mr Bull. 36 00:06:41,452 --> 00:06:44,163 Kim, baby, do you want the aisle or the window seat? 37 00:06:44,163 --> 00:06:46,832 - Whatever you want makes me happy. - I don't care. 38 00:06:46,832 --> 00:06:50,085 Good, then take the window. I wanna talk to Mitch. 39 00:06:50,294 --> 00:06:52,588 - Be right back. - Miss me. 40 00:06:53,088 --> 00:06:55,090 Admit it, pal. You had fun. 41 00:06:55,090 --> 00:06:59,386 No. Scuba diving is fun. I mean that's normal. People do that. 42 00:06:59,720 --> 00:07:03,515 Baseball fantasy camp, until Phil threw up on Willie Mays, was fabulous. 43 00:07:03,515 --> 00:07:07,394 - I was nervous. He was my idol. - I'll never forget Willie's face. 44 00:07:07,394 --> 00:07:09,897 "Say, hey. That's lunch on me." 45 00:07:10,939 --> 00:07:13,525 - Phil. I'm standing. - Yes, dear. 46 00:07:14,943 --> 00:07:17,780 Can't wait to get out of this country. 47 00:07:17,780 --> 00:07:23,285 Maybe it's just me, but I think our little adventures lately are becoming... stupid. 48 00:07:24,078 --> 00:07:26,163 What did you call them? 49 00:07:26,372 --> 00:07:28,999 - "Desperate attempt to cling to your youth." 50 00:07:28,999 --> 00:07:32,044 - That's bullshit. - Bullshit? Ed, have you noticed... 51 00:07:32,044 --> 00:07:34,630 ...the older you get, the younger your girlfriends get? 52 00:07:34,630 --> 00:07:36,966 Soon, you'll be dating sperm. 53 00:07:37,257 --> 00:07:40,594 - I'm back. - OK. I have just one more thing to say. 54 00:07:41,929 --> 00:07:44,431 - Target parachute jumping. - Ed! 55 00:07:44,431 --> 00:07:47,935 Now, it's a smaller parachute, but you're travelling twice as fast. 56 00:07:47,935 --> 00:07:51,730 Great! When they find your body, they can bury it in a sucrets box. 57 00:07:51,730 --> 00:07:54,608 - Phil said he'd go. - Phil wants to die. 58 00:07:54,650 --> 00:07:57,653 If you were married to that, you'd wanna die too. 59 00:07:57,653 --> 00:08:00,656 He's pretending to be asleep so he doesn't have to talk to her. 60 00:08:00,656 --> 00:08:03,200 It's a couple of little jumps from a plane. 61 00:08:03,200 --> 00:08:07,538 And then what? We go on safari, only the animals have guns and they hunt us? 62 00:08:07,621 --> 00:08:10,666 - Forget about it. - It's never enough for you, Ed. 63 00:08:10,666 --> 00:08:13,836 - I'm reading. - When's it ever gonna be enough? 64 00:08:28,726 --> 00:08:31,270 - Hi, Mom. 65 00:08:32,062 --> 00:08:34,231 /It's september 8th, 1952. 66 00:08:37,067 --> 00:08:40,571 /We're driving back from /your Aunt Marsha. My water breaks. 67 00:08:40,571 --> 00:08:44,074 /Your father jumps the divider /of the sawmill River parkway... 68 00:08:44,074 --> 00:08:46,952 /... and races me to Doctors' Hospital and... 69 00:08:49,580 --> 00:08:51,749 /... at 5.16, out you came. 70 00:08:53,083 --> 00:08:54,460 /Ohh... 71 00:08:54,585 --> 00:08:56,712 /Happy birthday, darling. 72 00:08:59,089 --> 00:09:02,384 /- Here's your father. /- Hello, boy. Happy birthday. 73 00:09:02,593 --> 00:09:06,096 - Hi, Dad, how are you? /- I'm losing feeling in my left leg. 74 00:09:06,096 --> 00:09:09,099 /- Here's your mother. /- Don't worry. He's fine. 75 00:09:09,099 --> 00:09:12,102 /So, what are you gonna /do now, birthday boy? 76 00:09:12,603 --> 00:09:16,106 I thought I'd lie here another three and a half hours, and then go to work. 77 00:09:16,106 --> 00:09:19,109 /- Is Barbara with you? - No, she's working the streets. 78 00:09:19,109 --> 00:09:22,613 She has her breakfast with her pimp. She'll be in around 7.30. 79 00:09:22,613 --> 00:09:25,115 - Hi, Mom. /- Give my boy a kiss. 80 00:09:28,118 --> 00:09:30,871 /I can't believe my baby's 39 years old. 81 00:09:35,125 --> 00:09:36,126 Bye, Mom. 82 00:09:36,126 --> 00:09:40,130 /Oh, bye. /Angel, birthday boy. 83 00:09:43,258 --> 00:09:45,010 Happy birthday. 84 00:09:55,771 --> 00:09:58,273 Well, at least she said my age in years. 85 00:09:58,273 --> 00:10:00,776 Usually she uses months, like I'm still an infant. 86 00:10:00,776 --> 00:10:04,154 "How's Mitch?" "Oh, good. He's 468 months today." 87 00:10:05,280 --> 00:10:06,573 Wow. 88 00:10:07,282 --> 00:10:10,577 I look a year older. Do I look a year older to you? 89 00:10:10,786 --> 00:10:13,872 Honey, at 5.15, everybody looks a year older. 90 00:10:15,582 --> 00:10:18,002 - Do you know what I found yesterday? - Hm? 91 00:10:18,002 --> 00:10:20,004 - Hair in my ear. - Mitch. 92 00:10:20,004 --> 00:10:24,008 I'm losing hair where I want hair, and getting one where it shouldn't be hair. 93 00:10:24,008 --> 00:10:27,720 I found four big fat ones on my back. I'm starting to look like the fly. 94 00:10:27,720 --> 00:10:30,806 That's it. I'm cancelling your birthday party. 95 00:10:32,057 --> 00:10:34,893 - Why? - Cos your birthdays depress you. 96 00:10:34,977 --> 00:10:36,979 - No, they don't. - Oh, Mitch. 97 00:10:36,979 --> 00:10:39,982 On your 30th birthday, you said you couldn't see. 98 00:10:39,982 --> 00:10:43,402 On your 34th birthday, you forgot my name for an hour. 99 00:10:43,485 --> 00:10:46,655 Last year, when I asked you what you wanted... 100 00:10:46,655 --> 00:10:48,699 ...you said a CAT scan. 101 00:10:49,158 --> 00:10:52,661 - I had a headache. - This year, let's just let it pass. 102 00:10:53,203 --> 00:10:55,873 - I wanna see my friends. - All right. 103 00:10:55,873 --> 00:10:59,877 But I don't want people coming over here thinking they're in a Bergman film. 104 00:10:59,877 --> 00:11:02,504 "You've met my husband, Mr Death?" 105 00:11:03,505 --> 00:11:05,591 - I'll be good. - Yeah? 106 00:11:05,591 --> 00:11:08,761 Cos I don't need you any worse than you've been. 107 00:11:10,262 --> 00:11:13,432 - Wait a second. What does that mean? - Nothing. 108 00:11:13,766 --> 00:11:15,392 "Nothing." 109 00:11:15,768 --> 00:11:17,144 Great. 110 00:12:13,701 --> 00:12:15,369 Got a minute? 111 00:12:17,663 --> 00:12:20,666 Hi. Only if a few minutes. I have career day at Danny's school. 112 00:12:20,666 --> 00:12:23,085 Yeah, it'll just take a second. 113 00:12:26,255 --> 00:12:27,798 What is it? 114 00:12:27,798 --> 00:12:29,300 /* Pizza Guy, Pizza Guy 115 00:12:29,300 --> 00:12:31,135 /* Come on down to Pizza Guy 116 00:12:31,135 --> 00:12:32,636 /* Be a happy, happy fella 117 00:12:32,636 --> 00:12:34,555 /* Have some sauce and mozzarella 118 00:12:34,555 --> 00:12:36,765 / * At Pizza Guy 119 00:12:36,765 --> 00:12:38,392 - So? - So. 120 00:12:39,393 --> 00:12:41,812 So, it's stupid. It's annoying. 121 00:12:42,896 --> 00:12:46,483 - It makes people change the station. - I didn't write it. 122 00:12:47,109 --> 00:12:50,821 You bought it. You put it on the air three times a night in a prime time. 123 00:12:50,821 --> 00:12:53,115 People are having accidents. 124 00:13:01,415 --> 00:13:04,043 You used to go out and get advertising. 125 00:13:04,043 --> 00:13:06,462 You hustled. You were creative. 126 00:13:06,545 --> 00:13:08,547 Something bad came in, you fixed it. 127 00:13:08,547 --> 00:13:11,050 You rewrote it. You worked with it. 128 00:13:11,050 --> 00:13:14,803 My God, we used to make fun of guys who bought crap like this. 129 00:13:16,430 --> 00:13:18,599 What's going on with you? 130 00:13:20,142 --> 00:13:23,646 Did you ever reach a point in your life where you think... 131 00:13:23,646 --> 00:13:27,650 ..."This is the best I'm ever gonna look, the best I'm ever gonna feel... 132 00:13:27,650 --> 00:13:31,153 ...the best I'm ever gonna do, and it ain't that great"? 133 00:13:32,154 --> 00:13:34,573 - Happy birthday. - Thank you. 134 00:13:37,701 --> 00:13:40,079 Look, I'm the station manager. 135 00:13:40,287 --> 00:13:45,000 I'm responsible... for the quality of work here at the station... 136 00:13:45,292 --> 00:13:49,338 ...so, until further notice, I shall personally approve all the new spots. 137 00:13:49,338 --> 00:13:52,925 What? I can't make a deal without checking with you first? 138 00:13:52,925 --> 00:13:55,386 Just till you get back on track. 139 00:13:58,180 --> 00:14:00,683 So we're doing this job on 60th and 3rd... 140 00:14:00,683 --> 00:14:03,268 ...big friggin' ballbreaker of a job, right? 141 00:14:03,268 --> 00:14:06,397 We got the area roped off so that some schmuck don't walk in... 142 00:14:06,397 --> 00:14:09,400 ...and take a wreckin' ball between the eyes. 143 00:14:09,400 --> 00:14:14,113 All of a sudden, this woman, with the big, dark glasses, the Bloomingdale's bags... 144 00:14:15,155 --> 00:14:17,157 ...she starts walkin' through the ropes. 145 00:14:17,157 --> 00:14:21,120 I yelled down at her "Hey, you can't go there, you stupid bitch!" 146 00:14:21,996 --> 00:14:24,957 Suddenly, this big steam fitting bursts... 147 00:14:25,582 --> 00:14:29,628 ...and this enormous goddamn crane crashes right down on her legs... 148 00:14:30,421 --> 00:14:33,340 ...and she's screaming "My legs! My legs!" 149 00:14:33,465 --> 00:14:37,678 And I say "No shit, your legs. You got a 2,000lb goddamn crane on'em." 150 00:14:39,930 --> 00:14:44,059 Now, do you know how, in an emergency, you can get superhuman strength? 151 00:14:45,644 --> 00:14:48,397 I reach down and I lift this crane... 152 00:14:48,647 --> 00:14:51,650 ...and Ernesto's able to slide her out from under... 153 00:14:51,650 --> 00:14:54,278 ...and the doctors were able to save her legs! 154 00:14:54,278 --> 00:14:58,198 So the moral is... don't walk where you're not supposed to walk... 155 00:14:58,615 --> 00:15:02,828 ...because there may not be somebody with superhuman strength to save you. 156 00:15:04,330 --> 00:15:08,375 And don't do drugs. That's it. 157 00:15:14,632 --> 00:15:17,968 Thank you, Mr Morelli. That was... very descriptive. 158 00:15:20,137 --> 00:15:24,391 Daniel, would you introduce your father, please, and tell us what he does? 159 00:15:29,104 --> 00:15:31,565 My Dad's named Mitch and he's... 160 00:15:31,607 --> 00:15:34,818 ...he's a submarine commander. 161 00:15:34,985 --> 00:15:36,362 Danny. 162 00:15:38,197 --> 00:15:40,324 He works for WBLM radio. 163 00:15:53,587 --> 00:15:56,632 Well, like Danny said, I work for WBLM radio. 164 00:15:58,092 --> 00:16:01,470 - Are you a disc jockey? - No, I'm not a disc jockey. 165 00:16:03,180 --> 00:16:06,183 You know the commercials that are on the radio? 166 00:16:06,183 --> 00:16:08,727 Do you make all those commercials? 167 00:16:08,769 --> 00:16:11,480 No. Other people make the commercials. 168 00:16:12,272 --> 00:16:15,985 I sell them time on our station for the commercials to be on. 169 00:16:16,777 --> 00:16:19,947 So you decide which commercials to use and when. 170 00:16:20,739 --> 00:16:24,410 That's right. Well, no, it's not right. It used to be right. 171 00:16:25,160 --> 00:16:29,665 Seems now that I have to check with the station manager if I wanna wipe my nose. 172 00:16:32,293 --> 00:16:35,671 The minute he took away my authority, I shoulda quit. 173 00:16:44,138 --> 00:16:45,723 Mr Robbins? 174 00:16:46,640 --> 00:16:48,309 What? 175 00:16:51,353 --> 00:16:53,856 Value this time in your life, kids. 176 00:16:53,856 --> 00:16:57,359 This is the time in your life when you still have your choices. 177 00:16:57,359 --> 00:16:59,278 It goes by so fast. 178 00:16:59,361 --> 00:17:02,865 When you're a teenager, you think you can do anything, and you do. 179 00:17:02,865 --> 00:17:07,161 Your 20s are a blur. 30s, you raise your family, you make a little money... 180 00:17:07,911 --> 00:17:11,373 ...and you think to yourself "What happened to my 20s?" 181 00:17:11,373 --> 00:17:15,919 40s, you grow a little pot belly, you grow another chin. The music gets too loud. 182 00:17:17,046 --> 00:17:20,424 An old girlfriend from high school becomes a grandmother. 183 00:17:20,424 --> 00:17:25,012 50s, you have a minor surgery. You'll call it a "procedure", but it's a surgery. 184 00:17:25,596 --> 00:17:29,141 60s, you'll have a major surgery. The music is still loud... 185 00:17:29,141 --> 00:17:31,143 ...but you can't hear it anyway. 186 00:17:31,143 --> 00:17:34,313 70s, you and the wife retire to Fort Lauderdale. 187 00:17:35,648 --> 00:17:38,150 You eat dinner at two in the afternoon... 188 00:17:38,150 --> 00:17:41,153 ...lunch around ten, breakfast the night before. 189 00:17:41,153 --> 00:17:45,157 You spend most of your time in malls looking for the ultimate soft yoghurt... 190 00:17:45,157 --> 00:17:48,369 ...and muttering "How come the kids don't call?" 191 00:17:48,619 --> 00:17:52,915 The 80s, you'll have a major stroke. You end up babbling to a Jamaican nurse... 192 00:17:52,915 --> 00:17:56,418 ...that your wife can't stand but who you call "Momma". 193 00:17:56,418 --> 00:17:58,128 Any questions? 194 00:18:00,589 --> 00:18:03,759 Danny was embarrassed to tell the class what my job is. 195 00:18:03,759 --> 00:18:08,305 They're nine! They get excited about the guy who gives them change at the arcade. 196 00:18:09,932 --> 00:18:13,769 You just happen to have one of those jobs that's difficult to... 197 00:18:14,353 --> 00:18:17,773 Believe that a grown man does without losing his mind. 198 00:18:18,941 --> 00:18:22,569 Well, what is my job? I sell advertising time on the radio. 199 00:18:22,945 --> 00:18:24,947 Basically, I sell air. 200 00:18:24,947 --> 00:18:29,243 At least my father was an upholsterer. He made a sofa, coach you can sit on it. 201 00:18:29,952 --> 00:18:33,580 What can I point to? Where's my work? It's air. I sell air. 202 00:18:33,956 --> 00:18:36,750 So what are you saying? You wanna quit? 203 00:18:37,459 --> 00:18:39,753 How can I quit? I'm trapped. 204 00:18:40,504 --> 00:18:43,799 - You're trapped? - Yeah. You want to send Holly... 205 00:18:43,799 --> 00:18:46,802 ...to a performing arts school. - She's got talent. 206 00:18:46,802 --> 00:18:49,805 Hellen, she was in one play, and she fell off the stage. 207 00:18:49,805 --> 00:18:53,309 That's not talent, that's gravity. And that school costs money. 208 00:18:53,309 --> 00:18:55,436 - Bye. - Bye. 209 00:18:55,853 --> 00:18:58,355 - Where are you going? - I'm sleeping at Gwen's. 210 00:18:58,355 --> 00:19:00,858 Again? Are you paying rent there? 211 00:19:01,984 --> 00:19:04,486 - Dad. - We're having a birthday party. 212 00:19:04,486 --> 00:19:08,365 - I don't wanna hang out with your friends. - I told her it'd be all right. 213 00:19:08,365 --> 00:19:10,951 We'll have a family party tomorrow. 214 00:19:15,205 --> 00:19:18,042 - Bye, Dad. Happy birthday. - Thank you. 215 00:19:23,339 --> 00:19:26,091 Let me show you how I pop my shoulder. 216 00:19:28,844 --> 00:19:30,804 Danny. Dan. Come on. 217 00:19:30,846 --> 00:19:32,848 He's in the gifted programme at school. 218 00:19:32,848 --> 00:19:34,850 Come on, go to sleep. 219 00:19:35,351 --> 00:19:39,647 Kim, you poor thing. What has married life done to you? You look like hell! 220 00:19:39,855 --> 00:19:43,359 Six months. Admit it. You didn't think Ed would ever get married. 221 00:19:43,359 --> 00:19:45,361 He met the right woman. 222 00:19:45,361 --> 00:19:49,823 - How often are you meeting that woman? - You're lucky it's your birthday, pal. 223 00:19:49,865 --> 00:19:52,993 Excuse me, I see one of the guests is stealing. 224 00:19:54,870 --> 00:19:58,040 Your husband is so cute. You must laugh all day. 225 00:19:58,874 --> 00:20:00,834 Yeah. My sides hurt. 226 00:20:00,876 --> 00:20:04,338 We saw a picture of you in a newspaper in your underwear. 227 00:20:04,338 --> 00:20:08,300 Oh, that was an advertisement. I sometimes model ladies' underwear. 228 00:20:08,759 --> 00:20:10,761 - You looked great. - Mom... 229 00:20:10,761 --> 00:20:14,473 ...you said "Let's see how she looks after having two kids." 230 00:20:17,267 --> 00:20:19,395 Daniel, time to go to bed. 231 00:20:19,395 --> 00:20:21,855 We'll wake you for your wedding. 232 00:20:24,400 --> 00:20:26,276 Phil. Psst. Hello. 233 00:20:28,028 --> 00:20:31,198 You're pretending to sleep at my birthday party. 234 00:20:31,365 --> 00:20:33,075 Is she around? 235 00:20:35,119 --> 00:20:37,121 She's in the kitchen. 236 00:20:38,914 --> 00:20:41,417 This is quite a life you've carved out for yourself, Phil. 237 00:20:41,417 --> 00:20:43,627 Phil! Phil! We're leaving. 238 00:20:45,129 --> 00:20:48,799 We haven't had cake. He hasn't even opened his presents yet. 239 00:20:49,133 --> 00:20:53,053 Phil, you have to open the store at 4.30. Daddy's counting on you. 240 00:20:53,637 --> 00:20:55,472 15 more minutes? 241 00:20:59,768 --> 00:21:01,437 Starting now. 242 00:21:09,194 --> 00:21:11,155 4.30 in the morning? 243 00:21:11,739 --> 00:21:14,742 You manage a supermarket, that's when the food arrives. 244 00:21:14,742 --> 00:21:16,827 Don't you have an assistant or a kid or somethin'? 245 00:21:16,827 --> 00:21:19,371 Arlene's father likes me to do it. 246 00:21:20,331 --> 00:21:23,334 "No free rides, Philly boy. No free rides." 247 00:21:24,835 --> 00:21:26,837 I'm tellin' you, they got me by the balls. 248 00:21:26,837 --> 00:21:29,381 She's got one, he's got the other. 249 00:21:31,550 --> 00:21:33,844 Do you ever think about quitting? 250 00:21:33,844 --> 00:21:35,721 Yeah, sure. Right. 251 00:21:35,846 --> 00:21:39,975 That's just what I wanna do. Start over, with two kids to take care of. 252 00:21:40,851 --> 00:21:43,646 No. At this age, where you are, you are. 253 00:21:46,023 --> 00:21:49,443 - Hey, look who's awake. - Look, I have got 14 minutes... 254 00:21:49,443 --> 00:21:51,945 ...so can we give him the present? - Yeah. 255 00:21:51,945 --> 00:21:53,822 What'd you get me? 256 00:21:54,365 --> 00:21:59,495 Two weeks. The three of us. New Mexico. Driving cattle. 257 00:21:59,870 --> 00:22:02,831 - What? Like in a truck? - No, no! Cowboys. 258 00:22:03,040 --> 00:22:07,294 - It's a real old-fashioned cattle drive. - We drive the herd to Colorado. 259 00:22:08,045 --> 00:22:11,674 - You can do this? - We ride, we sleep out under the stars. 260 00:22:12,216 --> 00:22:15,427 - Show him the brochure. - It's fantastic, Mitch. 261 00:22:16,595 --> 00:22:19,098 It's the newest thing. People do this! 262 00:22:19,098 --> 00:22:20,975 Wow. Look at this. 263 00:22:21,642 --> 00:22:23,769 - Real horses! - Does look good. 264 00:22:23,769 --> 00:22:27,231 "Good"? It's great. Cowboys - it's what you always wanted to be. 265 00:22:27,231 --> 00:22:30,526 - Remember Mitchy the Kid? - Right! Mitchy the Kid! 266 00:22:31,068 --> 00:22:35,614 And it's right when your vacation comes. We've been planning it for weeks. 267 00:22:36,198 --> 00:22:37,908 I can't do it. 268 00:22:39,994 --> 00:22:43,163 - Why? - We're going Florida to visit Barbara's parents. 269 00:22:43,163 --> 00:22:48,127 - What, are you sick? - No, it's planned already. I promised. 270 00:22:48,502 --> 00:22:52,756 I worked every weekend for a year to get this. What's with you these days? 271 00:22:53,090 --> 00:22:55,342 Nothing. You know, nothing. 272 00:22:56,093 --> 00:22:59,305 It's just, I... I don't wanna disappoint Barbara. 273 00:23:01,181 --> 00:23:05,019 Who is that? I know nine people and they're all here. Excuse me. 274 00:23:09,231 --> 00:23:11,942 - Hi. - Um, is Mr Phil Berquist here? 275 00:23:12,735 --> 00:23:15,446 Can I get you something to... 276 00:23:15,446 --> 00:23:18,490 Your housekeeper told me where you were. I'm in trouble. 277 00:23:18,490 --> 00:23:21,493 What are you doing here? Who's on register nine? 278 00:23:21,493 --> 00:23:22,995 - I don't know what to do. - Rumaki? 279 00:23:22,995 --> 00:23:26,373 - This isn't the time to talk about this. - I'm late. 280 00:23:26,498 --> 00:23:28,876 - What? - I missed my period. 281 00:23:29,001 --> 00:23:31,712 - What? - I was at work and on my break... 282 00:23:31,712 --> 00:23:34,757 ...and I took a home pregnancy test from aisle 11. 283 00:23:34,757 --> 00:23:38,052 - The ones on special? - Yes! And it came out blue. 284 00:23:38,969 --> 00:23:41,597 Why is she telling you this... Phil? 285 00:23:43,557 --> 00:23:45,559 Because I'm... I'm her boss... 286 00:23:45,559 --> 00:23:47,853 ...and we have a health plan. 287 00:23:48,562 --> 00:23:52,316 Son of a bitch! You screwed this little girl in my father's store? 288 00:23:52,316 --> 00:23:54,902 - No, no, no! - It was in his car! 289 00:23:55,653 --> 00:23:56,945 Oh, Jesus! 290 00:23:56,945 --> 00:23:59,490 And I'm not a little girl. I'm 20. 291 00:23:59,782 --> 00:24:02,576 Get out of this house, you little whore. 292 00:24:03,035 --> 00:24:06,330 Hey! I will not permit you to talk to her that way. 293 00:24:10,793 --> 00:24:12,127 Fine. 294 00:24:13,128 --> 00:24:16,966 - I'll tell my father what you did. - No! Do not call Mr Levine. 295 00:24:17,633 --> 00:24:20,886 - Hey! Put down that phone. Put it down. - No! No! 296 00:24:22,221 --> 00:24:24,390 - That's my phone! - You're crazy! 297 00:24:24,390 --> 00:24:27,810 Not having sex for 12 years will do that to a person! 298 00:24:27,893 --> 00:24:31,605 Come on, just stop it. Come on, not in front of your friends. 299 00:24:31,897 --> 00:24:33,941 I'm not afraid of you! 300 00:24:35,526 --> 00:24:39,405 - I'll call from the bedroom! - The bedroom? How would you know where that is? 301 00:24:40,239 --> 00:24:42,783 - I'm calling! - Go ahead. I'm sure he's home. 302 00:24:42,783 --> 00:24:45,786 It's his night to meet with the other escaped Nazis. 303 00:24:45,786 --> 00:24:48,288 - I hate you! - I hate you more. 304 00:24:49,289 --> 00:24:51,834 If hate were people, I'd be China. 305 00:24:59,717 --> 00:25:01,885 Let's bring out the cake. 306 00:25:08,350 --> 00:25:09,935 Good party. 307 00:25:12,187 --> 00:25:13,564 Mitch. 308 00:25:14,189 --> 00:25:18,193 Is that what you've been trying to tell me? That you feel like Phil? 309 00:25:19,695 --> 00:25:22,489 - Like Phil? - Am I gonna be sittin' here some night... 310 00:25:22,489 --> 00:25:25,826 ...and some checkout girl comes here looking for you? 311 00:25:25,993 --> 00:25:28,037 No, no, of course not. 312 00:25:28,329 --> 00:25:30,664 I know you're not happy here. 313 00:25:32,041 --> 00:25:35,169 You're not happy at work. I know how men think. 314 00:25:35,544 --> 00:25:39,506 "I'm not happy here. I'm not happy there. I'll be happy... here." 315 00:25:40,633 --> 00:25:43,010 No. You make me happy... here. 316 00:25:43,636 --> 00:25:44,887 No. 317 00:25:45,554 --> 00:25:49,266 - No, I make you feel trapped. - No, you don't. It's not you. 318 00:25:49,642 --> 00:25:53,145 How do you think that makes me feel when I hear you say that? 319 00:25:53,145 --> 00:25:57,066 I didn't mean you. It's me. 320 00:25:58,484 --> 00:26:02,404 I... I just feel lost. 321 00:26:07,368 --> 00:26:11,288 Kim was telling me about this cattle drive thing. 322 00:26:11,372 --> 00:26:12,623 Oh. 323 00:26:12,998 --> 00:26:16,835 - Maybe you should go. - What about Florida? 324 00:26:17,294 --> 00:26:20,464 You'll be miserable in Florida. You'll make me miserable. 325 00:26:20,464 --> 00:26:22,967 - You hate my parents. - I don't hate them. 326 00:26:22,967 --> 00:26:26,470 Come on, you have known my father since you were 18 years old... 327 00:26:26,470 --> 00:26:29,014 ...and you've never called him by his name. 328 00:26:29,014 --> 00:26:30,849 What is his name? 329 00:26:31,225 --> 00:26:33,644 It's a joke. I was just joking. 330 00:26:34,144 --> 00:26:37,106 Look, I said I'm gonna go and I'm gonna go. 331 00:26:37,147 --> 00:26:39,608 You don't understand what I'm saying. 332 00:26:39,608 --> 00:26:43,362 I'm not saying it's all right if you don't wanna come with us. 333 00:26:44,655 --> 00:26:47,282 I'm saying I don't want you to come. 334 00:26:51,745 --> 00:26:56,709 Go away with Ed. Take Phil. 335 00:26:56,917 --> 00:27:01,380 I am giving you these two weeks. It's my present. 336 00:27:02,756 --> 00:27:04,842 Go and find your smile. 337 00:27:08,053 --> 00:27:09,847 What if I can't? 338 00:27:12,599 --> 00:27:15,686 We'll jump off that bridge when we come to it. 339 00:28:00,397 --> 00:28:02,858 My ass hurts just watching this. 340 00:28:02,900 --> 00:28:05,486 Are you kidding? This is fantastic! 341 00:28:07,821 --> 00:28:11,492 - I wonder if I could do that to Arlene? - Forget about it already. 342 00:28:11,492 --> 00:28:14,119 I could do it. You've seen her ears. 343 00:28:15,996 --> 00:28:18,999 - They must be the guests. - I wish you hadn't worn this jacket. 344 00:28:18,999 --> 00:28:22,252 - Why not? - It's got your name and your picture on it. 345 00:28:22,252 --> 00:28:25,130 - It's a little grotesque. - I'm proud of what I do. 346 00:28:25,130 --> 00:28:27,633 So's the president. He doesn't wear his picture. 347 00:28:27,633 --> 00:28:31,637 - Hi. You guys guests here? - Yeah. We just got in. I'm Mitch Robbins. 348 00:28:31,637 --> 00:28:34,640 - Ed Furillo. I sell sporting goods. - Show him your jacket. 349 00:28:34,640 --> 00:28:36,517 I'm Phil Berquist. 350 00:28:36,725 --> 00:28:39,895 I committed adultery. Lost my job and my family. 351 00:28:41,105 --> 00:28:44,233 - His jacket's being made. - Oh, yeah. 352 00:28:44,316 --> 00:28:47,486 I'm Ben Jessup and this is my son, Steve Jessup. 353 00:28:47,861 --> 00:28:49,738 - Where you from? - Baltimore. 354 00:28:49,738 --> 00:28:52,908 - We have a dental practice there. - You're both dentists? 355 00:28:52,908 --> 00:28:57,037 Yes. We're black and we're dentists. Let's not make an issue out of it. 356 00:28:57,329 --> 00:29:00,582 They're not making an issue. You're making an issue. 357 00:29:00,582 --> 00:29:02,668 - Hi. - Hello. 358 00:29:03,585 --> 00:29:06,922 - Isn't this great? - We're Ira and Barry Shalowitz. 359 00:29:07,089 --> 00:29:10,551 - Ira and Barry, that's like the ice cream. - No, that's us. 360 00:29:10,551 --> 00:29:14,263 - We make Ira and Barry's ice cream. - Really? I love that ice cream. 361 00:29:14,722 --> 00:29:18,225 But on the commercials, it's a different Ira and Barry. It's two... 362 00:29:18,225 --> 00:29:20,644 - Good-looking guys. - Models. 363 00:29:21,603 --> 00:29:23,981 - If it was us, could you eat? 364 00:29:25,858 --> 00:29:27,484 Who is that? 365 00:29:30,279 --> 00:29:34,825 Hi. I'm Bonnie Rayburn. 366 00:29:36,618 --> 00:29:38,954 Actually, I was supposed to meet somebody here... 367 00:29:38,954 --> 00:29:42,499 ...but I got the message at the airport that she's not coming and... 368 00:29:42,541 --> 00:29:45,711 ...I feel really out of place. I'm thinking of leaving. 369 00:29:45,711 --> 00:29:47,046 No, no, stay. 370 00:29:49,089 --> 00:29:52,426 When I was alive, I would have found her attractive. 371 00:29:55,346 --> 00:29:56,722 Howdy. 372 00:29:56,847 --> 00:29:59,808 I'm Clay Stone and this is my wife, Millie. 373 00:29:59,850 --> 00:30:01,685 - How do. - Howdy. 374 00:30:01,685 --> 00:30:06,106 Welcome to the Stone ranch. Believe it or not, that work you saw a while ago... 375 00:30:06,106 --> 00:30:08,567 ...y'all are gonna be doin' that next two weeks. 376 00:30:08,567 --> 00:30:09,943 Yahoo! 377 00:30:11,487 --> 00:30:14,073 - That's a good "yahoo", son. - Thank you. 378 00:30:14,073 --> 00:30:17,493 This ranch has been in my family for five generations. 379 00:30:17,576 --> 00:30:21,080 We've always tried to live here by the code of the Old West. 380 00:30:21,080 --> 00:30:24,667 If you thought this was a dude ranch, I hate to disappoint you. 381 00:30:24,667 --> 00:30:27,920 This is not pretend. This is a real working ranch. 382 00:30:28,712 --> 00:30:32,257 We've gotta move these animals from here to our ranch in Colorado. 383 00:30:32,257 --> 00:30:36,428 - This is gonna be great. - You may feel like bunch of pigs 384 00:30:36,679 --> 00:30:40,599 ...but we're gonna be watching you. We're gonna see how you sit a horse. 385 00:30:40,599 --> 00:30:44,728 And in a few days, you'll be rounding up a herd and goin' after strays. 386 00:30:45,187 --> 00:30:49,191 And you're gonna be in some country that's just as pretty as heaven. 387 00:30:49,358 --> 00:30:52,820 Here's some folks you'll be working with. This is TR and Jeff. 388 00:30:52,820 --> 00:30:56,699 They're professional cowboys. Our trail boss will be in in a couple of days. 389 00:30:56,699 --> 00:30:59,201 This is the best Western chef going. 390 00:30:59,201 --> 00:31:02,830 Cookie! Tell'em what they're gonna eat. 391 00:31:03,288 --> 00:31:06,583 You ain't gonna be gettin' no nouveau almondine thin crust... 392 00:31:06,667 --> 00:31:09,253 ...bottled water, sauteed city food. 393 00:31:09,670 --> 00:31:12,339 Food's brown, hot-and plenty of it. 394 00:31:13,173 --> 00:31:19,305 It's not that bad! Now, we're gonna go to work in the morning. And I mean work. 395 00:31:19,638 --> 00:31:23,142 You came out here city slickers. You're gonna go home cowboys. 396 00:31:30,941 --> 00:31:34,737 - What do you think? - You look like one of the Village People. 397 00:32:02,765 --> 00:32:04,933 I'll take that shirt too. 398 00:32:10,064 --> 00:32:12,524 Excuse me. Here, boy. Here, boy! 399 00:32:47,101 --> 00:32:50,020 Hey! You did it again! Boy, you're gettin' great. 400 00:32:50,854 --> 00:32:52,731 See? There's nothin' too hard. 401 00:32:53,774 --> 00:32:56,235 OK. Good. You'll do it this time. 402 00:32:58,529 --> 00:33:01,031 That's it. Wrist, wrist, wrist, go. 403 00:33:01,031 --> 00:33:04,034 - Will you stop kidding around? - I'm not kidding around. 404 00:33:04,034 --> 00:33:08,163 I'm not good with ropes. I can't even take the string off a bakery box. 405 00:33:08,580 --> 00:33:10,708 - This time, run! - OK. 406 00:33:14,003 --> 00:33:15,462 Woo-hoo! 407 00:33:16,005 --> 00:33:17,339 Whoa! 408 00:33:17,589 --> 00:33:21,010 - Everyone can do it but you. It's embrrassing. - It's not a competition, Ed. 409 00:33:21,010 --> 00:33:24,013 Everything's a competition. Life's a competition. 410 00:33:24,013 --> 00:33:26,056 Come on, try it again. 411 00:33:26,682 --> 00:33:29,685 - How's it goin'? - OK. Where have you been? 412 00:33:30,102 --> 00:33:32,896 Oh, I was watching'em castrate a horse. 413 00:33:34,606 --> 00:33:37,109 Well, I'm hungry. How about you, hm? 414 00:33:37,109 --> 00:33:40,988 - Can I help you with that? - No, thanks. I think I'm getting it. 415 00:33:42,656 --> 00:33:44,950 Are you? Are you gettin' it? 416 00:33:46,660 --> 00:33:49,330 - See what's going on? - I'll take the big one. 417 00:33:49,330 --> 00:33:51,332 Wait, wait a second. We are guests here. 418 00:33:51,332 --> 00:33:54,335 - Are you gonna wrestle the cowboys? - I'm not gonna do nothing. 419 00:33:54,335 --> 00:33:56,837 Wait, wait. Hey. Let me handle this, OK? 420 00:33:56,837 --> 00:33:59,715 You know how you get. It'll be High Noon. 421 00:34:00,341 --> 00:34:02,551 Come on. Let me help you out. 422 00:34:02,551 --> 00:34:04,762 Look, just leave me alone. 423 00:34:06,055 --> 00:34:08,432 I can't, you see. I'm in love. 424 00:34:09,433 --> 00:34:11,477 Hi, boys. How are you? 425 00:34:11,935 --> 00:34:15,439 I was just ropin' over there. Thought I'd mosey on over. 426 00:34:15,439 --> 00:34:18,859 You know, I've never moseyed before. Hope I did it correctly. 427 00:34:18,859 --> 00:34:21,987 I've walked, I've ambled. I even sashayed once. 428 00:34:22,363 --> 00:34:24,865 But that was in front of the draft board. 429 00:34:29,662 --> 00:34:31,038 Hello! 430 00:34:35,334 --> 00:34:37,002 Rough corral. 431 00:34:37,336 --> 00:34:39,880 - Bonnie, wanna rope with us? - It's all right. 432 00:34:39,880 --> 00:34:43,384 - I think that Bonnie's talking with us. - She's fine right here. 433 00:34:43,384 --> 00:34:47,846 Guys, what are you doing? This isn't exactly '90s behaviour, I gotta be honest. 434 00:34:52,101 --> 00:34:55,270 - You stepped on my foot. - He did not, you horse's ass. 435 00:34:55,270 --> 00:34:57,815 - Ed. - You want a piece o' this? 436 00:34:57,856 --> 00:35:00,609 - Any time, Zeke. - How about right now, Stubby? 437 00:35:00,609 --> 00:35:01,944 Fine. 438 00:35:25,092 --> 00:35:28,554 - This man owes you an apology. - I'm sorry. I didn't mean anything. 439 00:35:28,554 --> 00:35:31,098 - Not you. Him. - Him. Of course. 440 00:35:36,020 --> 00:35:37,563 No. 441 00:35:41,025 --> 00:35:44,278 God, I'm sorry, ma'am. That'll never happen again. 442 00:35:44,361 --> 00:35:46,530 Yes, see that it doesn't. 443 00:35:48,615 --> 00:35:51,118 I'm sorry, I thought we were on the same... 444 00:35:51,118 --> 00:35:52,995 You're doing fine. 445 00:35:56,707 --> 00:35:58,792 You guys were drinking. 446 00:36:03,130 --> 00:36:05,341 Don't let it happen again. 447 00:36:17,561 --> 00:36:18,937 Ma'am. 448 00:36:26,695 --> 00:36:28,697 Did you see that guy? 449 00:36:29,698 --> 00:36:32,993 That is the toughest man I've ever seen in my life. 450 00:36:36,205 --> 00:36:40,167 Did you see how leathery he was? He was like a saddlebag with eyes. 451 00:36:41,627 --> 00:36:45,422 Listen, it took a lot of courage to do what you did. Thank you. 452 00:36:48,676 --> 00:36:50,302 I'm married. 453 00:37:00,646 --> 00:37:04,650 You're wrong, Ed. I'm tellin' you. It was not a stupid thing to say. 454 00:37:04,650 --> 00:37:07,653 It was. She says "Thanks" and you say "I'm married"? 455 00:37:07,653 --> 00:37:08,988 Yeah. 456 00:37:09,154 --> 00:37:12,491 I don't want any false flirtings. 457 00:37:12,658 --> 00:37:15,619 "False flirtings"? What if you're like me? 458 00:37:15,869 --> 00:37:18,872 What if you don't encourage them and they still chase you? 459 00:37:18,872 --> 00:37:24,128 It doesn't happen. Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place. 460 00:37:25,129 --> 00:37:28,716 - Good night. I'm going to bed. - Good night. Sleep tight. 461 00:37:31,844 --> 00:37:34,972 - That was flirting. - No. That was politeness. 462 00:37:35,848 --> 00:37:38,350 That was "Have a pleasant and restly evening." 463 00:37:38,350 --> 00:37:41,979 No. That was "I like your ass. Could I wear it as a hat?" 464 00:37:42,146 --> 00:37:46,150 Say, uh... Phil was telling us you had a little trouble with Jeff and TR. 465 00:37:46,150 --> 00:37:49,987 - They were giving Bonnie a hard time. - But he took care of it. 466 00:37:50,154 --> 00:37:53,365 What made it worse was, the trail boss comes over... 467 00:37:53,365 --> 00:37:54,742 Curly? 468 00:37:56,952 --> 00:37:59,204 His name is Curly? Perfect. 469 00:37:59,872 --> 00:38:03,751 You know what the cook said about him? He killed a man in a knife fight. 470 00:38:03,751 --> 00:38:06,462 He said he slit him from neck to nuts. 471 00:38:06,503 --> 00:38:08,672 I'm not happy about this. 472 00:38:09,173 --> 00:38:12,259 This guy's a cowboy. One of the last real men. 473 00:38:12,509 --> 00:38:14,511 He's untamed. A mustang. 474 00:38:14,511 --> 00:38:18,015 We're trained ponies. It'll do us good to be in his world a while. 475 00:38:18,015 --> 00:38:22,019 - "Do us good"? He was hanging the help. - He was helping us. 476 00:38:22,436 --> 00:38:26,357 This guy is not normal. Did you see his eyes? He's got crazy eyes. 477 00:38:26,857 --> 00:38:30,986 He's a lunatic. I'm tleein' you, we're going into the wilderness being led by a lunatic. 478 00:38:31,570 --> 00:38:33,739 He's behind me, isn't he? 479 00:38:36,116 --> 00:38:38,869 - Time to turn in. - Good night. 480 00:38:48,879 --> 00:38:51,757 I'm sorry. I didn't mean anything by that. 481 00:38:51,882 --> 00:38:53,968 I crap bigger than you. 482 00:39:04,395 --> 00:39:06,313 He's gonna kill me. 483 00:39:06,981 --> 00:39:09,191 Watch it! Excuse me. Whoa. 484 00:39:11,986 --> 00:39:14,947 - Whoa! - Great! You are riding so much better. 485 00:39:14,947 --> 00:39:18,075 Thanks. I just talked to, uh... Nancy. 486 00:39:18,450 --> 00:39:21,829 - Who's Nancy? - She's the, uh... the girl. 487 00:39:22,371 --> 00:39:24,915 Oh, the, uh... the girl. 488 00:39:25,291 --> 00:39:27,751 - She's not pregnant. - Really? 489 00:39:27,960 --> 00:39:30,838 - Well, that's good, isn't it? - For her. 490 00:39:31,755 --> 00:39:33,757 So what does it mean? 491 00:39:34,258 --> 00:39:38,053 You know what I think? Out there are all the answers. 492 00:39:38,554 --> 00:39:42,182 No, Ed. Out there... 493 00:39:45,728 --> 00:39:47,730 ...are cows, and plenty of'em. 494 00:39:47,730 --> 00:39:50,983 We're gonna go 200 miles with a big, moving stink. 495 00:39:51,150 --> 00:39:52,401 OK. 496 00:39:53,152 --> 00:39:56,739 You guys are probably too young to remember this, but when I was a kid... 497 00:39:56,739 --> 00:39:59,742 ...I remember seeing a movie called Red River. 498 00:39:59,742 --> 00:40:03,287 - Oh, I've seen it on TV. - But not in the movie theatre. 499 00:40:03,537 --> 00:40:06,915 The big screen, with John Wayne and Montgomery Clift. 500 00:40:07,625 --> 00:40:10,169 Remember the scene, the start of the cattle drive? 501 00:40:10,169 --> 00:40:13,172 - Dad... - No, no, son. That's why we're here. 502 00:40:13,172 --> 00:40:16,091 - The "yee-ha" scene? - The "yee-ha" scene. 503 00:40:16,091 --> 00:40:20,471 Before they took the cattle out, those cowboys waved their hats in the air... 504 00:40:21,096 --> 00:40:23,223 ...and yelled "Yee-ha!" 505 00:40:24,099 --> 00:40:27,478 - What do you say to that? - All right! Move'em out. 506 00:40:33,150 --> 00:40:35,110 - Yee-ha! - Yee-ha! 507 00:40:35,778 --> 00:40:37,738 - Ya-hoo! - Ya-hoo! 508 00:40:38,072 --> 00:40:39,281 Ya-hoo! 509 00:40:39,281 --> 00:40:40,699 Yee-ha. 510 00:40:42,201 --> 00:40:44,203 - Yee-haa! - Yee-ha! 511 00:40:46,038 --> 00:40:47,915 - Yee-ha! - Yee-ha! 512 00:40:47,915 --> 00:40:49,333 Yee-ha! 513 00:40:50,042 --> 00:40:53,045 - Feel like a schmuck? - Oh, yeah. A big schmuck. 514 00:40:53,045 --> 00:40:54,797 Yee-haa! 515 00:40:56,298 --> 00:40:58,217 We'll see you in Colorado. 516 00:41:04,181 --> 00:41:06,433 /* Fairy tales can come true 517 00:41:08,352 --> 00:41:10,396 /* It can happen to you 518 00:41:11,438 --> 00:41:13,607 /* If you're young at heart 519 00:41:16,443 --> 00:41:18,821 /* For it's hard, you will find 520 00:41:18,946 --> 00:41:20,990 /* To be narrow of mind 521 00:41:22,533 --> 00:41:24,702 /* If you're young at heart 522 00:41:27,287 --> 00:41:29,498 /* And if you should survive 523 00:41:30,207 --> 00:41:31,667 /* To 105 524 00:41:32,710 --> 00:41:34,962 /* Look at all you'll derive 525 00:41:35,713 --> 00:41:37,715 /* Just by being alive 526 00:41:42,261 --> 00:41:44,513 /* Now here is the best part 527 00:41:46,181 --> 00:41:48,267 /* You have a head start 528 00:41:48,809 --> 00:41:52,604 /* If you are amongst the very young 529 00:41:54,398 --> 00:41:55,941 /* At heart 530 00:42:08,412 --> 00:42:10,998 Look, a stray. You take him, Mitch. 531 00:42:11,874 --> 00:42:15,377 - No, it's the first one. You get him, Ed. - No, let Phil have him. 532 00:42:15,377 --> 00:42:19,214 - No, you get this one. - Are you sure? There's gonna be plenty. 533 00:42:19,214 --> 00:42:22,217 You get this one. I'll get the next one. Then Ed, then you... 534 00:42:22,217 --> 00:42:24,928 Like a round robin? That's good, yeah. 535 00:42:25,220 --> 00:42:27,723 - So who gets this one? - You. 536 00:42:27,723 --> 00:42:30,225 - Come on. Go! - Out of shoot No.9! 537 00:42:30,225 --> 00:42:31,977 Hey, go Mitchy! 538 00:42:34,063 --> 00:42:36,523 No, no. Don't go back there. No! 539 00:42:37,066 --> 00:42:39,652 Think I can't see you behind there? 540 00:42:40,069 --> 00:42:41,445 Hello! 541 00:42:42,071 --> 00:42:44,239 Come on, now. Here we go. 542 00:42:45,074 --> 00:42:47,076 Come on now. Here we go. Come on. 543 00:42:47,076 --> 00:42:49,244 It's like chasing a mime. 544 00:42:54,208 --> 00:42:55,960 Yee-ha, cowboy! 545 00:42:57,211 --> 00:42:59,546 - All right! - All right, Mitchy! 546 00:42:59,546 --> 00:43:01,507 I did it! All right! 547 00:43:03,217 --> 00:43:05,219 Uh-oh. Hey, moonwalk. 548 00:43:07,096 --> 00:43:11,600 I'd like to thank everybody for helping me get my stray in. 549 00:43:12,685 --> 00:43:15,270 All right, all right. Come on back. 550 00:43:15,270 --> 00:43:19,191 All right, now, easy on the clutch. Cut the wheel! Cut it, cut it. 551 00:43:19,274 --> 00:43:23,320 That's it. Straight back and park and lock it. You got the keys, sir? 552 00:43:25,364 --> 00:43:28,117 Whoo! I wish the kids coulda seen that. 553 00:43:29,368 --> 00:43:31,453 Dump it into the personal, then make out the cheque. 554 00:43:31,453 --> 00:43:35,249 - He should know. He's our accountant. - You're our accountant. 555 00:43:35,457 --> 00:43:38,961 - Don't... Just get a Mets score. - Arnold, I'm losing you. 556 00:43:38,961 --> 00:43:41,213 We're going behind a butte. 557 00:43:41,463 --> 00:43:43,966 Arnold? Arnold, what's the Mets score? 558 00:43:43,966 --> 00:43:46,051 The Mets... I lost him. 559 00:44:12,536 --> 00:44:15,247 Boy, that saddle's having all the fun. 560 00:44:15,539 --> 00:44:17,541 You have, like, a half-track mind. 561 00:44:17,541 --> 00:44:20,878 - You wouldn't screw her brains out? - Lovely image. 562 00:44:21,045 --> 00:44:25,591 It ranks up there with my other favourite of yours: "Bang the shit out of her." 563 00:44:26,759 --> 00:44:29,762 I'm sorry if I offended your delicate sensibilities. 564 00:44:29,762 --> 00:44:33,349 - You were staring at her pretty good. - That's different. 565 00:44:33,349 --> 00:44:35,351 - Different? - Yeah. 566 00:44:35,851 --> 00:44:39,396 Look. I go to an art gallery, right? And I see a Picasso. 567 00:44:39,855 --> 00:44:43,233 - Oh, she's a Picasso now? - No, she's not a Picasso. 568 00:44:43,484 --> 00:44:45,486 If she was, she'd have three tits. 569 00:44:45,486 --> 00:44:50,491 What I'm saying is if I see a nice painting, I look at it, but I don't pull it off the wall. 570 00:44:50,491 --> 00:44:52,451 Let me ask you this. 571 00:44:52,785 --> 00:44:56,288 What if you could have great sex with someone attractive... 572 00:44:56,288 --> 00:44:58,207 ...and Barbara would never find out? 573 00:44:58,207 --> 00:45:01,126 It's a big trap. I mean, look what happened to Phil. 574 00:45:01,126 --> 00:45:04,129 The girl came to his house, then she came to my house. 575 00:45:04,129 --> 00:45:05,464 Yeah. 576 00:45:06,632 --> 00:45:10,636 - Let's say a spaceship lands. - Good, reality. Are you listening to this? 577 00:45:10,636 --> 00:45:14,515 A spaceship lands and the most beautiful woman you ever saw gets out. 578 00:45:14,515 --> 00:45:18,602 All she wants to do is have the greatest sex in the universe with you. 579 00:45:19,061 --> 00:45:22,648 - Could happen. - When it's over, she flies away for ever. 580 00:45:23,107 --> 00:45:26,777 No one will ever know. You're telling me you wouldn't do it? 581 00:45:27,111 --> 00:45:32,992 No. It just what you describing actually happened to my cousin Ronald. And his wife did find out about 582 00:45:33,409 --> 00:45:36,036 - They know everything there. - Forget about it. 583 00:45:36,036 --> 00:45:39,498 I'm saying it wouldn't make it all right if Barbara didn't know. 584 00:45:39,498 --> 00:45:42,501 I'd know, and I wouldn't like myself. That's all. 585 00:45:42,501 --> 00:45:46,588 - Pay attention, girls. We got strays. - Hi, Curly. Kill anyone today? 586 00:45:47,631 --> 00:45:49,550 Day ain't over yet. 587 00:45:56,432 --> 00:45:58,809 I wonder what Barbara's doing. 588 00:45:59,059 --> 00:46:02,187 You're really with just one woman for 15 years? Just one? 589 00:46:02,187 --> 00:46:06,400 Yes, Ed. I'm married. I caught my limit. Why are you after me about this? 590 00:46:08,610 --> 00:46:13,240 Let's say... all your life, for breakfast, you eat from the Kellogg's variety pack. 591 00:46:13,615 --> 00:46:17,578 - And a spaceship lands. - No. Then you don't get the variety pack. 592 00:46:17,703 --> 00:46:21,707 You pick one, your favourite one, and you just get that one from then on. 593 00:46:21,707 --> 00:46:25,085 Every day for the rest of your life, the same cereal. 594 00:46:25,127 --> 00:46:28,672 Then you wake up one morning... and you're just not hungry any more. 595 00:46:28,672 --> 00:46:30,883 You can't get an erection. 596 00:46:31,759 --> 00:46:34,762 Hey, pal. I can get an erection any time I want. Watch. 597 00:46:34,762 --> 00:46:39,516 Ed, please don't. Leave the stallion in the corral. You'll knock me into the fire, OK? 598 00:46:42,603 --> 00:46:44,647 See, here's the thing. 599 00:46:45,105 --> 00:46:48,025 - Kim wants to have kids. - And you don't? 600 00:46:48,692 --> 00:46:51,862 I say it's because we wouldn't have as much fun. 601 00:46:52,196 --> 00:46:54,198 But that's not the reason. 602 00:46:54,198 --> 00:46:57,576 Having a kid, that's heavy. That's a real commitment. 603 00:46:58,077 --> 00:47:02,164 That's saying I'm never gonna be with another woman for the rest of my life. 604 00:47:02,164 --> 00:47:04,667 Wait a minute, let me get this straight. 605 00:47:04,667 --> 00:47:07,836 I have no life. We're all agreed on that, right? 606 00:47:07,962 --> 00:47:10,005 - Right. - OK. 607 00:47:10,047 --> 00:47:12,549 Your big problem is that you're married... 608 00:47:12,549 --> 00:47:15,552 ...to this gorgeous 24-year-old underwear model... 609 00:47:15,552 --> 00:47:20,099 ...who thinks the sun rises and sets in your pants, and that's not enough for you? 610 00:47:20,557 --> 00:47:23,769 - You don't understand. - No, I don't understand. 611 00:47:24,561 --> 00:47:27,731 - I don't wanna screw around on Kim. - So don't. 612 00:47:28,148 --> 00:47:29,400 Oh. 613 00:47:29,566 --> 00:47:31,819 From the king of restraint. 614 00:47:31,860 --> 00:47:35,197 - What does that mean? - It means that's pretty smug advice... 615 00:47:35,197 --> 00:47:39,743 ...from a man who mounted an 18-year-old checkout girl on the day-old bread rack. 616 00:47:39,785 --> 00:47:43,122 - She's 20, and shut up. - Let me get you hot, Phil. 617 00:47:43,288 --> 00:47:46,542 - "I need a price, register nine." - Cut it out. 618 00:47:47,710 --> 00:47:50,879 What'd you use for protection? Paper or plastic? 619 00:47:50,963 --> 00:47:53,424 - Come on! - We're on vacation! 620 00:47:57,970 --> 00:48:01,598 - You're spookin' the cattle. - We were just fooling around. 621 00:48:01,598 --> 00:48:03,434 See you tomorrow. 622 00:48:06,061 --> 00:48:07,438 Sunup. 623 00:48:14,987 --> 00:48:16,488 - Morning. - Hi. 624 00:48:16,488 --> 00:48:19,491 - You done with that? - Yeah, help yourself. 625 00:48:19,491 --> 00:48:21,744 See, Mom, we're keeping clean. 626 00:48:21,744 --> 00:48:24,538 It's cold... but I'm a real pioneer man. 627 00:48:31,754 --> 00:48:34,006 - Morning. - Good morning. 628 00:48:35,591 --> 00:48:38,510 Come on, guys. You're sorry, you're sorry. 629 00:48:38,927 --> 00:48:40,846 Let's make up, huh? 630 00:48:46,935 --> 00:48:48,479 All right. 631 00:48:50,314 --> 00:48:52,733 - My fault. - No, it's all right. 632 00:48:52,733 --> 00:48:56,737 Gotta celebrate. I got a special treat. I'm gonna make fresh coffee. 633 00:48:56,862 --> 00:49:00,616 Battery-operated. Instantly grinds its own beans. Only 19.95. 634 00:49:01,075 --> 00:49:04,119 - Come on, why live like animals? - That's great. 635 00:49:04,119 --> 00:49:06,121 First cup's for my good friend Phil. 636 00:49:06,121 --> 00:49:09,625 When we were kids, he used to let me watch his sister undress. 637 00:49:09,625 --> 00:49:12,628 I never forgot it, Phil... cos I still do it. OK. 638 00:49:20,761 --> 00:49:23,430 Wow. Something's spookin' the cattle. 639 00:49:23,681 --> 00:49:26,308 Look, look. The cows are going away. 640 00:49:31,021 --> 00:49:33,899 - Wow, look at'em go. - That is amazing. 641 00:49:34,108 --> 00:49:36,568 - Stampede! - We gotta get'em. 642 00:49:39,488 --> 00:49:40,489 Whoa! 643 00:49:40,489 --> 00:49:43,617 - Beautiful. Get that in the frame. - I got it. 644 00:49:59,633 --> 00:50:01,552 I'm gonna die. I'm gonna die. Oh, God. 645 00:50:01,552 --> 00:50:03,554 They're comin' at us! 646 00:50:13,480 --> 00:50:16,275 - Come on! - Hold on, hold on, hold on. 647 00:50:27,202 --> 00:50:29,413 Bonnie, there's a stampede... 648 00:50:29,413 --> 00:50:31,165 ...in your tent. 649 00:51:35,354 --> 00:51:36,897 City folk. 650 00:51:44,488 --> 00:51:50,369 I'm sorry. I mean, I was just tryin' to make a cup of coffee. That's all. 651 00:51:52,538 --> 00:51:54,915 It was... it was French roast. 652 00:51:56,000 --> 00:51:59,920 There's still a few head missin'. Must have gone into that canyon. 653 00:52:00,004 --> 00:52:03,007 - TR and I'll get'em. - No, I'll get'em... 654 00:52:03,549 --> 00:52:05,134 ...with you. 655 00:52:06,593 --> 00:52:08,304 - Me? - Yeah. 656 00:52:09,013 --> 00:52:12,099 - You're comin' with me. - Just the two of us? 657 00:52:14,727 --> 00:52:17,563 You move the herd. I'll catch up. 658 00:52:17,688 --> 00:52:20,482 - You mean, we'll catch up. - Let's go. 659 00:52:32,536 --> 00:52:33,829 Bye. 660 00:52:36,540 --> 00:52:41,045 Curly, did I ever show you pictures of my wife and kids? I'm their sole support. 661 00:52:42,546 --> 00:52:45,174 - Is he gonna be all right? - Sure. 662 00:52:45,341 --> 00:52:49,261 Curly's just trying to scare him. You know Mitch. He's a wise ass. 663 00:52:50,346 --> 00:52:52,765 If anything happens to him... 664 00:52:53,849 --> 00:52:56,060 ...I'm going after Barbara. 665 00:53:02,399 --> 00:53:05,903 Throw a rope on this'un so we can go after the others. Rope him. 666 00:53:05,903 --> 00:53:09,031 I'm not good at it. I have a roping disability. 667 00:53:22,628 --> 00:53:25,005 - Be right with you. 668 00:53:30,928 --> 00:53:32,596 Jesus Christ. 669 00:53:36,600 --> 00:53:39,061 Hey. See, I'm good at this part. 670 00:53:39,603 --> 00:53:41,105 Throw it. 671 00:53:51,824 --> 00:53:54,743 You know what just occurred to me? Roping is stupid. 672 00:53:54,743 --> 00:53:58,414 This is a cow, not a gazelle. Watch. Get off the horse, huh? 673 00:54:02,084 --> 00:54:05,713 Then you walk up to the cow. Look how good this is working. 674 00:54:05,963 --> 00:54:10,301 Then you say "Hi, Bob Vila for This Old Herd. We're gonna rope you today." 675 00:54:10,467 --> 00:54:14,096 Then you take Mr Loop and put it around the head of Mr Cow. 676 00:54:19,977 --> 00:54:22,730 - What's wrong with that? 677 00:54:26,567 --> 00:54:28,819 - That! - I'm on vacation! 678 00:54:39,747 --> 00:54:41,999 - Is that it? - That's it. 679 00:54:45,753 --> 00:54:48,380 - What are we doing? - Making camp. 680 00:54:49,256 --> 00:54:53,427 Too late to catch up with the herd before dark. We'll catch up tomorrow. 681 00:54:54,261 --> 00:54:57,264 You mean we're gonna sleep out here? Just... 682 00:54:59,266 --> 00:55:00,934 That's right. 683 00:55:04,271 --> 00:55:06,482 Oh, God. It's Deliverance. 684 00:55:16,075 --> 00:55:18,160 Getting ready to shave? 685 00:55:18,786 --> 00:55:22,456 You make a lot of... smart remarks at my expense, don't you? 686 00:55:24,625 --> 00:55:27,086 I'm joking. I do with everybody. 687 00:55:29,129 --> 00:55:30,965 It's just my way. 688 00:55:31,590 --> 00:55:33,884 I don't understand that way. 689 00:55:40,724 --> 00:55:42,434 Put that away. 690 00:55:47,648 --> 00:55:49,775 I said... put that away. 691 00:55:54,071 --> 00:55:58,075 You know, the first time I tried to talk to you, you embarrassed me. 692 00:55:58,075 --> 00:56:02,496 So I teased you a little bit, which maybe I shouldn't have done. So I'm sorry. 693 00:56:02,496 --> 00:56:05,582 Now you're playing with your knife, trying to frighten me... 694 00:56:05,582 --> 00:56:08,127 ...which you're doing a good job... 695 00:56:09,586 --> 00:56:12,089 But if you're gonna kill me... get on with it. 696 00:56:12,089 --> 00:56:14,258 If not, shut the hell up. 697 00:56:16,093 --> 00:56:17,886 I'm on vacation. 698 00:56:44,830 --> 00:56:46,957 /* See them tumbling down 699 00:56:49,335 --> 00:56:51,920 /* Pledging their love to the ground 700 00:56:52,838 --> 00:56:55,257 /* Lonely but free I'll be found 701 00:56:56,342 --> 00:56:59,428 /* Driftin' along /with the tumblin' tumbleweeds 702 00:57:03,349 --> 00:57:05,726 /* Cares of the past are behind 703 00:57:07,353 --> 00:57:09,688 /* Nowhere to go but I'll find 704 00:57:12,358 --> 00:57:14,818 /* Just where the trail will wind 705 00:57:17,363 --> 00:57:20,449 /* Drifting along /with the tumblin' tumbleweeds 706 00:57:29,583 --> 00:57:32,169 Do you know any show tunes? 707 00:57:32,336 --> 00:57:35,839 The second it's over, she'll get back into her spaceship... 708 00:57:35,839 --> 00:57:37,841 ...and fly away for eternity. 709 00:57:37,841 --> 00:57:40,594 - Would you do it? - Is she a redhead? 710 00:57:42,346 --> 00:57:43,847 Could be. 711 00:57:44,848 --> 00:57:46,642 I like redheads. 712 00:57:50,854 --> 00:57:53,273 - You ever been married? - No. 713 00:57:55,859 --> 00:57:57,903 You ever been in love? 714 00:57:59,863 --> 00:58:01,281 Once... 715 00:58:02,366 --> 00:58:04,868 I was drivin' a herd across the Panhandle. 716 00:58:04,868 --> 00:58:06,745 - Texas. - Mm-hm. 717 00:58:08,497 --> 00:58:11,917 Passed near this little dirt farm round about sundown. 718 00:58:13,502 --> 00:58:16,380 Out in the field was this young woman... 719 00:58:16,505 --> 00:58:18,757 ...working down in the dirt. 720 00:58:19,508 --> 00:58:22,761 Just about then, she stood up to stretch her back. 721 00:58:25,514 --> 00:58:31,020 She was wearing a little cotton dress, and the settin' sun was right behind her... 722 00:58:32,021 --> 00:58:34,940 ...showing the shape that God had give her. 723 00:58:35,524 --> 00:58:37,234 What happened? 724 00:58:38,777 --> 00:58:41,363 I just turned around and rode away. 725 00:58:42,281 --> 00:58:43,574 Why? 726 00:58:45,284 --> 00:58:48,579 I figured it wasn't gonna get any better than that. 727 00:58:48,787 --> 00:58:52,041 Yeah, but you could've been, you know... with her. 728 00:58:52,207 --> 00:58:54,209 I been with lots of women. 729 00:58:54,209 --> 00:58:57,921 Yeah, but, you know, she could've been the love of your life. 730 00:58:58,213 --> 00:58:59,632 She is. 731 00:59:01,216 --> 00:59:03,761 That's great. That's... not great. 732 00:59:04,428 --> 00:59:08,599 No, that's wrong. You passed up something that might have been terrific. 733 00:59:08,932 --> 00:59:11,935 - My choice. - I never could have done that. 734 00:59:11,935 --> 00:59:13,854 That's your choice. 735 00:59:14,772 --> 00:59:18,651 A cowboy leads a different kind of life. When there were cowboys. 736 00:59:20,903 --> 00:59:22,863 We're a dyin' breed. 737 00:59:25,491 --> 00:59:27,951 Still means somethin' to me, though. 738 00:59:27,951 --> 00:59:31,747 In a couple of days, we'll move this herd across the river... 739 00:59:33,457 --> 00:59:35,876 ...drive'em through the valley. 740 00:59:38,462 --> 00:59:41,256 There's nothin' like bringin' in a herd. 741 00:59:41,632 --> 00:59:44,635 See, now that's great. Your life makes sense to you. 742 00:59:46,679 --> 00:59:50,391 - What's so funny? - You city folk worry about a lot of shit. 743 00:59:51,183 --> 00:59:54,812 Shit? My wife basically told me she doesn't want me around. 744 00:59:55,646 --> 00:59:57,481 Is she a redhead? 745 00:59:57,648 --> 01:00:00,442 - I'm just saying... - How old are you? 746 01:00:00,651 --> 01:00:02,277 - 38. - 39. 747 01:00:03,070 --> 01:00:06,073 Y'all come up here about the same age. Same problems. 748 01:00:06,073 --> 01:00:09,535 Spend about 50 weeks a year gettin' knots in your rope. 749 01:00:09,576 --> 01:00:12,997 Then you think two weeks up here'll untie'em for you. 750 01:00:13,580 --> 01:00:15,499 None of you get it. 751 01:00:18,085 --> 01:00:21,463 - Do you know what the secret of life is? - No. What? 752 01:00:23,007 --> 01:00:25,092 - This. - Your finger? 753 01:00:25,634 --> 01:00:27,845 One thing. Just one thing. 754 01:00:29,763 --> 01:00:33,183 You stick to that and everything else don't mean shit. 755 01:00:33,559 --> 01:00:36,437 That's great, but... what's the one thing? 756 01:00:37,855 --> 01:00:40,357 That's what you gotta figure out. 757 01:00:48,407 --> 01:00:50,409 Oh, damn it. Come on! 758 01:00:58,000 --> 01:01:01,086 - What's goin' on? - This cow's having a baby. 759 01:01:05,382 --> 01:01:07,384 I noticed it when we found her. 760 01:01:07,384 --> 01:01:11,263 I was hopin' she'd make it through the drive, but... she's ready. 761 01:01:11,388 --> 01:01:13,432 Does she do it herself? Or do you help her? 762 01:01:13,432 --> 01:01:16,268 I'll hold her down. You deliver the calf. 763 01:01:16,435 --> 01:01:19,438 Excuse me? Hello? Why don't I hold her down? 764 01:01:20,356 --> 01:01:24,443 You don't know how. She'll kick you and kill you, and her and the calf. 765 01:01:24,443 --> 01:01:27,863 - That's too much for me to carry back. - I see your point. 766 01:01:27,863 --> 01:01:29,865 Come on. She's ready. 767 01:01:32,076 --> 01:01:34,036 - I... - She's burstin'! 768 01:01:34,036 --> 01:01:36,455 Oh, God. There's gonna be bursting? 769 01:01:36,455 --> 01:01:39,083 Just reach in and pull out the calf. 770 01:01:53,889 --> 01:01:55,182 Ooh. 771 01:02:00,813 --> 01:02:04,942 - You know, this was not in the brochure. - She needs help, goddamn it! 772 01:02:09,780 --> 01:02:12,741 What's taking so long? Do you see the head? 773 01:02:15,452 --> 01:02:16,453 Ugh. 774 01:02:20,457 --> 01:02:22,960 - I only see a tail. - Oh, shit. 775 01:02:23,210 --> 01:02:25,921 It's turned the wrong way. Get it out. 776 01:02:27,631 --> 01:02:29,008 Uh-oh. 777 01:02:29,133 --> 01:02:30,968 - My watch came off. - Now! 778 01:02:30,968 --> 01:02:33,178 - It was a gift! - Do it! 779 01:02:35,973 --> 01:02:37,433 Come on. 780 01:02:55,826 --> 01:02:58,871 - Oh, Jesus. - Look what I did! I made a cow. 781 01:03:03,834 --> 01:03:06,545 This is unbelievable. This is amazing. 782 01:03:08,088 --> 01:03:09,965 He looks like you. 783 01:03:10,591 --> 01:03:12,801 Look at him. Yeah. Get up. 784 01:03:14,178 --> 01:03:16,263 - Oh, shit. 785 01:03:18,140 --> 01:03:20,726 Look at this. He's walking already. 786 01:03:21,143 --> 01:03:24,605 He's a genius. He gets that from my side of the family. 787 01:03:25,064 --> 01:03:27,149 We all walk very early. 788 01:03:29,193 --> 01:03:32,571 I'm gonna name him Norman. You know, cos years ago... 789 01:03:37,534 --> 01:03:40,329 - Why did you do that? - She was dying. 790 01:03:42,623 --> 01:03:44,667 And she was suffering. 791 01:03:46,210 --> 01:03:48,087 We saved the calf. 792 01:03:53,217 --> 01:03:55,052 Good job, cowboy. 793 01:04:08,774 --> 01:04:11,860 There you go, Norman. You are only down a quart. 794 01:04:11,860 --> 01:04:15,614 That's really wonderful. You got him to drink from the bottle. 795 01:04:16,448 --> 01:04:19,451 Yeah, thank God, cos my nipples were killing me. 796 01:04:20,995 --> 01:04:24,999 What do you think? What would be the perfect flavour with this meal? 797 01:04:25,708 --> 01:04:27,710 - Cherry vanilla? - No. 798 01:04:27,710 --> 01:04:31,880 If it was Chinese food, right on the money, but this... toasted almonds. 799 01:04:35,384 --> 01:04:36,302 What's goin' on? 800 01:04:36,302 --> 01:04:40,347 Barry can pick out the right flavour of ice cream to follow any meal. 801 01:04:42,099 --> 01:04:44,226 Go ahead. Challenge him. 802 01:04:45,686 --> 01:04:48,480 - "Challenge him"? - Come on. 803 01:04:49,690 --> 01:04:51,525 Franks and beans. 804 01:04:51,692 --> 01:04:55,279 Scoop of chocolate, scoop of vanilla. Don't waste my time. 805 01:05:03,746 --> 01:05:05,581 Come on. Push me. 806 01:05:11,378 --> 01:05:13,464 - Sea bass. - Grilled? 807 01:05:14,840 --> 01:05:17,051 - Sauteed. - I'm with ya. 808 01:05:17,843 --> 01:05:19,762 Potatoes au gratin. 809 01:05:23,223 --> 01:05:24,767 Asparagus. 810 01:05:32,483 --> 01:05:34,068 Rum raisin. 811 01:05:36,779 --> 01:05:38,072 Woof! 812 01:05:38,072 --> 01:05:40,783 Woof what? How do you know he's right? 813 01:05:41,116 --> 01:05:45,454 How do we know? 1400 retail outlets across the country. That's how we know. 814 01:05:48,082 --> 01:05:49,375 Woof! 815 01:05:49,375 --> 01:05:51,877 Will you stop with Roberto Clemente? 816 01:05:51,877 --> 01:05:54,964 Henry Aaron was the greatest right fielder of our generation. 817 01:05:54,964 --> 01:05:58,717 - Could he run like Clemente? - I'm gonna say one thing to you. 818 01:05:58,717 --> 01:06:00,803 755 home runs. Goodbye. 819 01:06:01,929 --> 01:06:03,931 Clemente was killed in a plane crash. 820 01:06:03,931 --> 01:06:07,434 - You're gonna blame that on Aaron? - No. I'm just saying. 821 01:06:07,434 --> 01:06:10,813 - Oh, baseball. - You got something against baseball? 822 01:06:11,188 --> 01:06:15,859 I used to live with a guy who was like a baseball encyclopaedia. I just got flashes. 823 01:06:15,985 --> 01:06:18,988 - You broke up with him cos of baseball? - Uh, no. 824 01:06:18,988 --> 01:06:22,741 We had different needs. I needed him to treat me decently and get a job. 825 01:06:22,741 --> 01:06:25,661 He needed to empty my bank account and leave. 826 01:06:25,661 --> 01:06:26,996 Ouch. 827 01:06:28,080 --> 01:06:31,292 - So do you hate baseball? - No, I like baseball. 828 01:06:31,542 --> 01:06:35,546 I just never understood how you guys can spend so much time discussing it. 829 01:06:35,546 --> 01:06:38,340 I've been to games, but I don't memorise... 830 01:06:38,340 --> 01:06:41,510 ...who played third base for Pittsburgh in 1960. 831 01:06:41,844 --> 01:06:43,137 Don Hoak. 832 01:06:43,137 --> 01:06:46,223 - Beat you. - See, that's exactly what I mean. 833 01:06:46,724 --> 01:06:50,102 So what do you and your friends talk about out there? 834 01:06:50,894 --> 01:06:52,771 Well... real life. 835 01:06:54,440 --> 01:06:57,526 Relationships. Are they working, are they not? 836 01:06:57,943 --> 01:06:59,945 Who's she seeing. Is that working? 837 01:06:59,945 --> 01:07:02,656 - No contest. We win. - Why? 838 01:07:03,615 --> 01:07:07,745 Honey, if that were as interesting as baseball... 839 01:07:08,120 --> 01:07:11,290 ...they'd have cards for it and sell it with gum. 840 01:07:13,083 --> 01:07:16,670 Ed, I see by the sun it's time for you to hibernate again. 841 01:07:17,338 --> 01:07:19,923 You're right, I suppose. I guess it is childish... 842 01:07:19,923 --> 01:07:22,343 ...but when I was about 18... 843 01:07:23,427 --> 01:07:27,348 ...and my dad and I couldn't communicate about anything at all... 844 01:07:27,931 --> 01:07:30,601 ...we could still talk about baseball. 845 01:07:31,727 --> 01:07:33,604 Now that was real. 846 01:07:38,692 --> 01:07:41,320 You know what the secret of life is? 847 01:07:41,362 --> 01:07:42,905 It's this. 848 01:07:44,448 --> 01:07:46,659 One thing. Just one thing. 849 01:07:48,243 --> 01:07:50,913 - And what's that? - I have no idea. 850 01:07:51,747 --> 01:07:54,249 But ask Curly cos he seems to know. 851 01:07:54,249 --> 01:07:57,127 - Curly knows the secret of life? - Yeah. 852 01:07:57,753 --> 01:08:00,464 I'm gonna invite him over. He's a very interesting guy. 853 01:08:00,464 --> 01:08:02,216 I'm sure he is. 854 01:08:08,973 --> 01:08:10,557 Hey, Curly. 855 01:08:11,558 --> 01:08:13,936 Curly? Curl, you got a minute? 856 01:08:16,063 --> 01:08:21,443 He is a real cowboy. He sleeps with his eyes open so he can still watch the herd. 857 01:08:24,488 --> 01:08:26,115 Curl. Curly? 858 01:08:42,298 --> 01:08:46,719 Is this all right? Do you need, like, a licence or something to bury somebody? 859 01:08:47,219 --> 01:08:50,055 Nah. This is where Curly'd wanna be buried. 860 01:08:50,055 --> 01:08:53,600 He said he was a dying breed. I didn't know he meant on this trip. 861 01:08:53,600 --> 01:08:57,229 The man ate bacon at every meal. I mean, you can't do that. 862 01:08:57,896 --> 01:09:00,024 Well, I guess that's it. 863 01:09:00,107 --> 01:09:03,902 Wait a minute. Shouldn't somebody say something? Like a eulogy. 864 01:09:04,111 --> 01:09:06,780 - Yeah. - Cookie, you knew him best. 865 01:09:12,536 --> 01:09:16,999 Lord, we give you Curly. Try not to piss him off. 866 01:09:17,791 --> 01:09:19,335 That's it? 867 01:09:19,627 --> 01:09:22,046 What else is there? I got chicken burning. 868 01:09:22,046 --> 01:09:25,257 You're a warm man, Cookie. Wait a second. I'll... 869 01:09:29,470 --> 01:09:31,722 What can I say about Curly? 870 01:09:31,972 --> 01:09:34,975 I didn't know you well, but I'll never forget you. 871 01:09:34,975 --> 01:09:38,479 You lived life on your terms - simple, honest and brave. 872 01:09:40,481 --> 01:09:43,484 I'm glad for this short time that we spent together. 873 01:09:43,484 --> 01:09:45,069 Amen. 874 01:09:45,527 --> 01:09:46,862 Amen. 875 01:09:54,870 --> 01:09:57,373 Do you think this is all right? With them? 876 01:09:57,373 --> 01:10:01,585 All right, listen up. Ben, I want you to take the left flank with TR and Bonnie. 877 01:10:01,585 --> 01:10:04,088 I want you three boys to ride point. 878 01:10:04,088 --> 01:10:06,924 I'm gonna push with Steve, Barry and Ira. 879 01:10:06,966 --> 01:10:09,426 Yeah, they're pros. It'll be OK. 880 01:10:34,410 --> 01:10:36,203 So long, cowboy. 881 01:10:53,846 --> 01:10:57,349 - You know, it makes you stop and think. - Stop the clock. 882 01:10:57,349 --> 01:11:00,144 - That's 25 minutes. I win. - Win what? 883 01:11:00,853 --> 01:11:04,773 I had under a half an hour before you started to talk about death. 884 01:11:04,857 --> 01:11:07,359 Why would you think I would talk about death? 885 01:11:07,359 --> 01:11:11,071 We just came from a funeral. And it's your favourite subject. 886 01:11:11,363 --> 01:11:13,782 It is not. I think when you see a life end... 887 01:11:13,782 --> 01:11:16,785 ...it's a natural time to think about your own mortality. 888 01:11:16,785 --> 01:11:19,496 No, it isn't. Why do that to yourself? 889 01:11:19,788 --> 01:11:22,291 When somebody dies, I don't change places with him. 890 01:11:22,291 --> 01:11:24,793 I appreciate the fact that I'm not dead. 891 01:11:24,793 --> 01:11:28,297 Look at this. It's a beautiful day. I'm here with my best friends. 892 01:11:28,297 --> 01:11:31,050 We're driving a herd of cattle across the plains. 893 01:11:31,050 --> 01:11:34,595 Pretty goddamn great. It's one of the best days of my life. 894 01:11:34,595 --> 01:11:37,598 All right. What is the best day of your life? 895 01:11:37,640 --> 01:11:41,226 - You mean ever? - Yeah. Best day ever in your whole life. 896 01:11:41,644 --> 01:11:45,272 And you can't do when your kids were born. That's too easy. 897 01:11:45,439 --> 01:11:46,982 I got one. 898 01:11:47,941 --> 01:11:50,944 I'm seven years old and my dad takes me to Yankee Stadium. 899 01:11:50,944 --> 01:11:52,655 My first game. 900 01:11:52,946 --> 01:11:56,450 We're going in this long, dark tunnel underneath the stands. 901 01:11:56,450 --> 01:12:00,496 I'm holding his hand and we come up out of the tunnel into the light. 902 01:12:01,705 --> 01:12:06,335 It was huge. How green the grass was. Brown the dirt. 903 01:12:07,211 --> 01:12:10,172 And that great green copper roof. Remember? 904 01:12:10,339 --> 01:12:14,718 We had a black-and-white TV, so this was the first game I ever saw in colour. 905 01:12:15,010 --> 01:12:17,262 I sat there the whole game next to my Dad. 906 01:12:17,262 --> 01:12:19,682 He taught me how to keep score. 907 01:12:20,265 --> 01:12:22,184 Mickey hit one out. 908 01:12:22,768 --> 01:12:25,646 - Good day. - I still have the programme. 909 01:12:27,439 --> 01:12:30,567 All right, what was the worst day you ever had? 910 01:12:32,611 --> 01:12:36,073 Worst day. A couple of years ago, Barbara finds a lump. 911 01:12:36,115 --> 01:12:38,117 - What? - Jesus. 912 01:12:38,117 --> 01:12:41,286 - It scared the shit out of me. - You never said anything. 913 01:12:41,286 --> 01:12:45,207 Yeah, well, it turned out to be nothing. But that whole day was... 914 01:12:47,209 --> 01:12:49,628 - Yeah, but that was a good day. - How? 915 01:12:49,628 --> 01:12:54,258 - Because it turned out to be nothing. - Yeah, but the day until then was horrible. 916 01:12:54,633 --> 01:12:56,635 Yeah, but it came out good. 917 01:12:56,635 --> 01:13:00,639 You're a real "the glass is half-empty" kind of a guy, you know that? 918 01:13:00,639 --> 01:13:03,058 I don't know how Barbara can stand it. 919 01:13:03,058 --> 01:13:04,393 Yeah. 920 01:13:04,560 --> 01:13:07,062 All right. I got one. My best day. 921 01:13:07,062 --> 01:13:09,231 The one about Arlene and that loose step? 922 01:13:09,231 --> 01:13:11,317 No. No, my wedding day. 923 01:13:12,109 --> 01:13:14,611 - What? - Yeah. Remember that day? 924 01:13:14,611 --> 01:13:20,367 Outdoor wedding. Arlene looked great. Those water pills really worked. 925 01:13:20,868 --> 01:13:25,414 You guys are all smiling at me. And my dad, in the front... 926 01:13:26,332 --> 01:13:29,001 ...gives me a little wink... you know? 927 01:13:29,835 --> 01:13:33,631 I mean, he's not the warmest of men... but he winked. 928 01:13:34,340 --> 01:13:36,925 I was the first to get married and have a real job. 929 01:13:36,925 --> 01:13:39,595 I remember thinking "I'm grown-up." 930 01:13:40,471 --> 01:13:43,849 You know? "I'm not a goofball any more. I made it." 931 01:13:45,476 --> 01:13:47,353 I felt like a man. 932 01:13:48,479 --> 01:13:50,814 It's the best day of my life. 933 01:13:51,649 --> 01:13:55,069 - What was your worst day? - Every day since is a tie. 934 01:13:58,864 --> 01:14:02,368 All right, Ed. Your best day. What is it, twins in a trapeze? 935 01:14:02,368 --> 01:14:04,870 - No, I don't wanna play. - We did it. 936 01:14:04,870 --> 01:14:06,872 I don't feel like it. 937 01:14:07,081 --> 01:14:08,332 OK. 938 01:14:13,837 --> 01:14:17,174 I'm 14 and my mother and father are fighting again. 939 01:14:17,341 --> 01:14:20,344 You know, because she caught him again. Caught him! 940 01:14:20,344 --> 01:14:23,764 This time, the girl drove by the house to pick him up. 941 01:14:25,224 --> 01:14:30,521 I finally realised he wasn't just cheating on my mother. He was cheating on us. 942 01:14:30,688 --> 01:14:36,527 So I told him. I said "You're bad to us. We don't love you." 943 01:14:37,152 --> 01:14:41,156 "I'll take care of my mother and my sister. We don't need you any more." 944 01:14:41,156 --> 01:14:44,535 He made like he was gonna hit me, but I didn't budge. 945 01:14:44,660 --> 01:14:48,288 Then he turned around and he left. Never bothered us again. 946 01:14:49,748 --> 01:14:53,252 But I took care of my mother and my sister from that day on. 947 01:14:53,252 --> 01:14:55,170 That's my best day. 948 01:14:56,380 --> 01:14:58,507 What was your worst day? 949 01:14:59,091 --> 01:15:00,592 Same day. 950 01:15:05,931 --> 01:15:08,309 He gets the sign from Berra... 951 01:15:08,434 --> 01:15:10,436 He gets the sign from Berra. The pitch. 952 01:15:10,436 --> 01:15:11,770 Whoa! 953 01:15:24,450 --> 01:15:26,702 /* Rollin', rollin', rollin" 954 01:15:26,702 --> 01:15:28,912 /* Keep them dogies rollin" 955 01:15:29,204 --> 01:15:30,956 /* Man, my ass is swollen 956 01:15:30,956 --> 01:15:32,499 /* Rawhide! 957 01:15:32,958 --> 01:15:34,960 /* Get'em up, move'em out, /wake'em up, get'em dressed 958 01:15:34,960 --> 01:15:36,962 /* Get'em shaved, /comb their hair, rawhide 959 01:15:36,962 --> 01:15:39,965 /* Tie me down, tell me lies, /pull my hair, smack my thighs 960 01:15:39,965 --> 01:15:42,468 /* With a big wet strap of rawhide 961 01:15:57,316 --> 01:15:59,151 What is he doing? 962 01:16:02,279 --> 01:16:03,822 Whoa, boy! 963 01:16:03,864 --> 01:16:06,784 - He's drunk, the old shithead. - Where'd he get the liquor? 964 01:16:06,784 --> 01:16:10,579 - How do I know that? - Goddamn, we better get him outta there. 965 01:16:15,084 --> 01:16:17,962 - Is that a happy face? 966 01:16:18,420 --> 01:16:19,964 He's nuts. 967 01:16:24,927 --> 01:16:27,763 - He's throwing our food. - Well, we'll... 968 01:16:27,763 --> 01:16:30,099 We'll what? We'll order out?! 969 01:16:38,983 --> 01:16:42,319 - He's headed for the ravine. - I'm sure he sees it. 970 01:16:45,030 --> 01:16:46,824 - Jump! 971 01:17:00,421 --> 01:17:02,923 What can you say about Skyrocket and Buttercup? 972 01:17:02,923 --> 01:17:07,094 - Let's just get out of here. - Let's recap on what we've buried so far. 973 01:17:07,386 --> 01:17:11,223 - Trail boss, two horses... - I can't believe we buried horses. 974 01:17:11,223 --> 01:17:15,561 The impact drove'em into the ground. We just covered'em up with some dirt. 975 01:17:16,729 --> 01:17:19,732 - How do we move the food and the tents? - Tents roll up. 976 01:17:19,732 --> 01:17:23,319 We can pack enough food in our saddlebags to get us there. 977 01:17:23,569 --> 01:17:25,362 OK. Let's do it. 978 01:17:25,571 --> 01:17:29,199 The problem is Cookie. Let's no forget his legs are broken. 979 01:17:29,450 --> 01:17:31,827 Oh, God, they're gonna shoot him. 980 01:17:31,827 --> 01:17:35,456 We put Cookie on this litter so we can get him out of here. 981 01:17:35,581 --> 01:17:38,876 Me and TR are gonna stay with you all and the herd. 982 01:17:39,084 --> 01:17:42,046 We're gonna be hittin' some pretty rough mountain country. 983 01:17:42,046 --> 01:17:46,300 There's a town, it's about half a day's ride outta here. I can draw a map. 984 01:17:46,717 --> 01:17:49,595 Somebody's gotta take Cookie. Volunteers? 985 01:17:56,644 --> 01:17:59,438 - I guess Steve and I should go. - Why? 986 01:18:00,147 --> 01:18:02,650 He's injured and we have medical training. 987 01:18:02,650 --> 01:18:05,569 We're dentists! Are we gonna give him a cleaning? 988 01:18:05,569 --> 01:18:08,781 We have a better chance of helping than anyone, son. 989 01:18:08,781 --> 01:18:11,617 - But you're having fun. - Ride with me. 990 01:18:12,159 --> 01:18:14,370 It will still be fun. Huh? 991 01:18:17,164 --> 01:18:20,501 - That's really great of you, Ben, Steve. - Thanks a lot. 992 01:18:20,501 --> 01:18:22,294 - Thanks, Ben. - Good luck. 993 01:18:22,294 --> 01:18:25,339 - Thank you, Dr Jessup. - We would have gone, but... 994 01:18:25,339 --> 01:18:27,633 Good. I'll make up that map. 995 01:18:29,385 --> 01:18:32,388 Hey, look. I found where Cookie was hiding his whisky. 996 01:18:32,388 --> 01:18:34,723 - You old coot. - Hey, Jeff. 997 01:18:37,559 --> 01:18:41,855 - Shouldn't we do something? - Let'em have fun, then they'll sleep it off. 998 01:18:44,066 --> 01:18:46,568 I knew we couldn't trust these guys. 999 01:18:46,568 --> 01:18:50,030 I said "Tennis camp." You said "Let's drive cattle." 1000 01:18:50,030 --> 01:18:52,366 Wait a minute. I got an idea. 1001 01:18:56,370 --> 01:18:58,580 - Look at this. - Norman. 1002 01:18:59,832 --> 01:19:02,835 - Norman. - What are they doing with Norman? 1003 01:19:03,335 --> 01:19:06,005 Mitchy! Mitchy, come on out and play. 1004 01:19:07,256 --> 01:19:10,592 - Don't go out there. - What do you think, I'm nuts? 1005 01:19:12,928 --> 01:19:15,347 Mitch, do you like calf brains? 1006 01:19:18,100 --> 01:19:21,478 - This is over a cow. - Here's your last chance. 1007 01:19:21,729 --> 01:19:25,441 - They won't hurt me. There's witnesses. - Please be careful. 1008 01:19:25,983 --> 01:19:29,194 They're just gonna embarrass me, so I'll let'em. 1009 01:19:33,490 --> 01:19:36,744 Norman, have you been bothering the cowboys again? 1010 01:19:37,328 --> 01:19:40,372 You raise them, you try to teach them right from wrong... 1011 01:19:40,372 --> 01:19:44,627 ...but they learn these things from their friends. It's the school systems. 1012 01:19:49,506 --> 01:19:51,634 You're grounded, mister. 1013 01:19:53,218 --> 01:19:55,262 These cows today, huh? 1014 01:19:58,724 --> 01:20:00,851 You pansy-assed bastard. 1015 01:20:01,435 --> 01:20:05,356 - Are you talking to me or Norman? - You shit-nosed little faggot. 1016 01:20:06,565 --> 01:20:08,025 Who, me? 1017 01:20:09,777 --> 01:20:13,781 Listen, guys. We have a group of people here who came out for a good time... 1018 01:20:13,781 --> 01:20:17,242 ...and to say the least, it's been a little bit strange. 1019 01:20:19,161 --> 01:20:21,664 But we're counting on you to get us through this. 1020 01:20:21,664 --> 01:20:26,627 So I'm asking you, please, why don't you just go and sleep it off, huh? 1021 01:20:27,753 --> 01:20:29,505 Sleep this off. 1022 01:20:36,679 --> 01:20:38,097 Yee-ha! 1023 01:20:49,566 --> 01:20:52,528 Put the gun down! Put down the goddamn gun! 1024 01:20:58,075 --> 01:21:01,745 - Phil. - I'm not gonna let him bully us any more. 1025 01:21:02,371 --> 01:21:04,999 - My father-in-law's a bully - Phil. 1026 01:21:04,999 --> 01:21:06,750 I hate bullies! 1027 01:21:08,502 --> 01:21:11,171 Cos a bully doesn't just beat you up. 1028 01:21:11,880 --> 01:21:14,591 - He takes away your dignity. - Phil! 1029 01:21:14,883 --> 01:21:16,510 I hate that. 1030 01:21:17,386 --> 01:21:19,430 I really... hate that. 1031 01:21:22,850 --> 01:21:24,226 Sorry. 1032 01:21:27,563 --> 01:21:28,897 Bang! 1033 01:21:33,986 --> 01:21:36,989 All right, you two assholes, go sleep it off. 1034 01:21:42,661 --> 01:21:46,624 And let's have some peace and quiet around here for Christ's sakes! 1035 01:21:48,459 --> 01:21:51,420 I'm tired. I've been under a lot of stress. 1036 01:21:53,172 --> 01:21:55,549 I lost my wife. I lost my job. 1037 01:21:57,676 --> 01:22:01,347 And I've got some sort of rash... from making in the bushes. 1038 01:22:08,228 --> 01:22:10,481 - Are you OK? - Yeah. 1039 01:22:24,536 --> 01:22:26,955 Phil, thanks. That was amazing. 1040 01:22:29,041 --> 01:22:31,251 - What? - You know, uh... 1041 01:22:32,544 --> 01:22:34,296 Oh, that. Yeah. 1042 01:22:37,549 --> 01:22:40,219 Why don't you put the gun down, Phil? 1043 01:22:40,552 --> 01:22:44,056 Oh, you don't have to worry. I know how to handle a gun. 1044 01:22:44,348 --> 01:22:46,809 I used to keep one at the store. 1045 01:22:46,850 --> 01:22:50,354 You lock up late at night, there's a lot of cash around. 1046 01:22:52,356 --> 01:22:56,110 You gotta make sure that the register totals match the cash... 1047 01:22:56,360 --> 01:22:58,737 ...and cheques and the coupons. 1048 01:22:59,863 --> 01:23:03,242 You got the order forms to fill out for the next day. 1049 01:23:03,283 --> 01:23:06,662 You gotta check the stock. I mean, there's a lot to do there. 1050 01:23:06,662 --> 01:23:08,956 It's a very responsible job. 1051 01:23:16,880 --> 01:23:18,465 Oh, Christ. 1052 01:23:21,260 --> 01:23:23,470 Oh, Phil. Come on, Philly. 1053 01:23:24,763 --> 01:23:27,224 Come on, man. It's not that bad. 1054 01:23:27,266 --> 01:23:31,103 I'm at a dead end. I'm almost 40 years old. I've wasted my life. 1055 01:23:32,229 --> 01:23:35,691 Yeah, but now you got a chance to start over. You know? 1056 01:23:38,819 --> 01:23:41,322 Phil, remember when we were kids? 1057 01:23:42,031 --> 01:23:45,534 And we'd be playing ball and the ball would get stuck up in a tree? 1058 01:23:45,534 --> 01:23:48,829 - And we'd yell "Do over!" Huh? - Yeah. 1059 01:23:49,288 --> 01:23:53,375 Your life is a "do over". You got a clean slate. 1060 01:23:54,627 --> 01:23:56,712 I got no place to live. 1061 01:23:57,630 --> 01:24:01,467 I'm gonna get wiped out in the divorce cos I committed adultery. 1062 01:24:02,635 --> 01:24:05,346 So I may never even see my kids again. 1063 01:24:06,347 --> 01:24:07,890 I'm alone. 1064 01:24:11,018 --> 01:24:13,228 How's that slate look now? 1065 01:24:15,356 --> 01:24:17,483 Well, the fun continues. 1066 01:24:17,900 --> 01:24:19,985 - They're gone. - Who? 1067 01:24:20,069 --> 01:24:22,404 Jeff and TR. They skedaddled. 1068 01:24:23,947 --> 01:24:26,784 They jumped on their horses and took off. 1069 01:24:26,825 --> 01:24:29,328 They probably thought we'd get'em in trouble. 1070 01:24:29,328 --> 01:24:32,456 Does anybody know how to get where we're going? 1071 01:24:34,333 --> 01:24:37,836 - So we're talking death? - Won't Ben and Steve send some help? 1072 01:24:37,836 --> 01:24:42,049 Maybe they won't. When they left, we were still pretty much OK. 1073 01:24:42,341 --> 01:24:44,885 - Still, they might. - "Might"? 1074 01:24:45,010 --> 01:24:47,513 We're hanging our lives on "might"? 1075 01:24:47,513 --> 01:24:51,558 Let's not get hysterical, OK? Calm down. 1076 01:24:51,934 --> 01:24:55,396 Now, for four days, we've been going in this direction. 1077 01:24:55,437 --> 01:24:59,066 - I think we keep going in that direction. - Isn't that a little vague? 1078 01:24:59,066 --> 01:25:04,029 Curly said there was a river and a valley. We'll just have to do the best we can. 1079 01:25:04,071 --> 01:25:06,115 So you're saying we can drive this herd? 1080 01:25:06,115 --> 01:25:08,242 Herd? Are you delirious? 1081 01:25:09,618 --> 01:25:13,247 We leave the herd. We'll go ten times as fast without them. 1082 01:25:14,123 --> 01:25:17,126 But there's no pasture land up here. There's no water. 1083 01:25:17,126 --> 01:25:19,670 I don't think they can survive up here. 1084 01:25:19,670 --> 01:25:22,840 Not to sound cold-hearted, but so-the-hell-what? 1085 01:25:23,757 --> 01:25:27,594 They give us a trail boss with a coronary and a bunch of drunks... 1086 01:25:27,594 --> 01:25:30,097 ...and we're supposed to worry about the cattle? 1087 01:25:30,097 --> 01:25:33,517 - You're a nicer person than I am. - No, you're right. 1088 01:25:34,518 --> 01:25:37,271 The rest of you go ahead. I'll drive the herd. 1089 01:25:37,271 --> 01:25:40,858 - What are you talking about? - I think I can bring in the herd. 1090 01:25:40,858 --> 01:25:43,444 No, you can't. What are you, crazy? 1091 01:25:43,569 --> 01:25:46,655 You couldn't even manage your stores. You had to bring in your cousin. 1092 01:25:46,655 --> 01:25:50,075 Mitch, you were right about all the weekend warrior shit. 1093 01:25:50,075 --> 01:25:53,495 The war games, the parachuting. That was all bullshit. 1094 01:25:53,579 --> 01:25:55,622 But this is really happening. 1095 01:25:55,622 --> 01:25:58,876 No rules, no games. Just "Can I do it?" 1096 01:25:59,418 --> 01:26:03,005 It is a game. It's your regular game, Ed. Don't you see it? 1097 01:26:03,005 --> 01:26:06,258 "Am I better than my father"? Well, you are, OK? 1098 01:26:06,383 --> 01:26:09,428 - Look, I need to do this. - It's impossible. 1099 01:26:09,970 --> 01:26:11,930 I'll do it with you. 1100 01:26:13,307 --> 01:26:18,020 Phil. Phil, you have, like, a day's worth of food and water left. 1101 01:26:18,312 --> 01:26:20,606 - We'll be all right. - Maybe you won't. 1102 01:26:20,606 --> 01:26:24,109 Why don't you accept that you don't know what we're going through? 1103 01:26:24,109 --> 01:26:26,612 I know exactly what you're going through. 1104 01:26:26,612 --> 01:26:31,533 You think bringing in this herd is gonna repair all the broken pieces of your life come together? 1105 01:26:31,533 --> 01:26:34,536 Hey, you don't wanna do it, don't do it. We wanna do it. 1106 01:26:34,536 --> 01:26:37,706 - I'm not doing it. - Don't do it. I'm not asking you to do it. 1107 01:26:37,706 --> 01:26:42,336 You have been talking me into doing stuff like this all my life, and I am not doing it! 1108 01:26:42,336 --> 01:26:45,339 What, are you deaf? I'm not asking you to do it. 1109 01:26:45,339 --> 01:26:46,715 Great! 1110 01:26:47,925 --> 01:26:49,635 Come on, Phil. 1111 01:26:54,264 --> 01:26:55,849 It's crazy. 1112 01:27:19,289 --> 01:27:24,044 We'll ride out together tomorrow morning... without the herd. 1113 01:27:26,213 --> 01:27:28,632 They can do whatever they want. 1114 01:27:47,067 --> 01:27:50,029 Come on. We've got cattle to move. 1115 01:27:54,074 --> 01:27:57,077 Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! What are you doing? 1116 01:27:57,328 --> 01:28:00,331 I'm not listening to you. Goddamn cattle drive. 1117 01:28:00,331 --> 01:28:03,292 - Just do your job. - I'm not listening to you any more. 1118 01:28:03,292 --> 01:28:06,795 - Listen to the cows. - Come on, you damn little dogies. 1119 01:28:07,129 --> 01:28:09,882 Hey, stop that! Cut that out! 1120 01:28:10,049 --> 01:28:13,761 - What are you doing? - They're not cooperating. It's just like bringin' up my kids. 1121 01:28:13,969 --> 01:28:17,306 - You take those. I'll take these. - Hey, come back here. 1122 01:28:18,349 --> 01:28:20,267 Hey! Stop! Stop it! 1123 01:28:21,477 --> 01:28:23,437 Stop! Get back here! 1124 01:28:24,104 --> 01:28:27,149 Ah, the hell with you. Who needs you, anyway? 1125 01:28:33,155 --> 01:28:34,907 What the he...? 1126 01:28:35,658 --> 01:28:37,534 How did I do that? 1127 01:28:41,163 --> 01:28:42,748 Hey, Mitch! 1128 01:28:47,711 --> 01:28:49,964 It's Mitch! Mitchy the Kid! 1129 01:28:50,965 --> 01:28:54,259 Curly said there's nothing like bringing in a herd. 1130 01:29:06,063 --> 01:29:07,940 Nice hat, partner. 1131 01:29:10,442 --> 01:29:11,443 Come on. 1132 01:29:11,443 --> 01:29:13,696 Hey, there's my little man. 1133 01:29:13,696 --> 01:29:17,449 Sorry I was late, but there was so much traffic. Let's go. Ha! 1134 01:29:23,414 --> 01:29:25,916 Don't be ashamed. I had the same problem. 1135 01:29:25,916 --> 01:29:28,419 Didn't you feel stupid? I mean... 1136 01:29:28,919 --> 01:29:31,297 Didn't you feel... inadequate? 1137 01:29:31,422 --> 01:29:34,300 Yeah, for a while. But then I overcame it. 1138 01:29:34,925 --> 01:29:38,429 Can I explain it you again? Promise me you won't get upset. 1139 01:29:38,429 --> 01:29:40,848 OK. It's not gonna do any good. 1140 01:29:42,433 --> 01:29:46,770 OK. If you wanna watch one show, but record another show at the same time... 1141 01:29:46,937 --> 01:29:49,440 ...the TV does not have to be on channel three. 1142 01:29:49,440 --> 01:29:50,941 - It does. - It doesn't. 1143 01:29:50,941 --> 01:29:54,445 If you're watching what you're recording, it has to be on three. 1144 01:29:54,445 --> 01:29:57,031 - The TV or the machine? - The TV. 1145 01:29:57,448 --> 01:29:59,575 I can record something I'm not watching? 1146 01:29:59,575 --> 01:30:03,078 Yes, that's the point. You don't even need a TV to record. 1147 01:30:03,078 --> 01:30:05,581 - How would I see it? - To see it, you need a TV. 1148 01:30:05,581 --> 01:30:08,459 Shut up. Just shut up. He doesn't get it! 1149 01:30:09,043 --> 01:30:13,839 He'll never get it. It's been four hours. The cows can tape something by now. 1150 01:30:14,048 --> 01:30:16,175 Forget about it, please! 1151 01:30:18,427 --> 01:30:21,889 - How do you do the clock? - You're dead. You are dead! 1152 01:30:44,703 --> 01:30:46,413 Yah! Yah! Yah! 1153 01:30:47,206 --> 01:30:49,792 Let's go. Come on, Norman. Keep up. 1154 01:30:50,709 --> 01:30:53,629 Norman, stay with the class. Come on, boy. 1155 01:30:54,421 --> 01:30:55,923 Aw, shit. 1156 01:30:56,423 --> 01:30:59,343 - What do we do now? - Like I should know? 1157 01:30:59,343 --> 01:31:02,930 - Come on, let's keep the herd together. - Yeah, let's go. 1158 01:31:03,347 --> 01:31:07,059 Let's go, Norman. Norman, what are you? Gene Kelly? Let's go. 1159 01:31:21,365 --> 01:31:23,617 Easy, boy. Whoa! Easy, boy. 1160 01:31:25,244 --> 01:31:26,996 Go! Go, go, go! 1161 01:31:37,715 --> 01:31:40,217 We're doing great guys. We're driving'em. 1162 01:31:40,217 --> 01:31:43,679 That's perfect. We're lost, but we're making good time. 1163 01:31:43,721 --> 01:31:46,390 This is the way, guys. I can feel it. 1164 01:32:04,241 --> 01:32:06,744 - Is there a way around? - That could be a hundred miles. 1165 01:32:06,744 --> 01:32:09,872 - It could take days. - Is this supposed to be here? 1166 01:32:09,872 --> 01:32:13,334 There's probably an easy place to cross but we missed it. 1167 01:32:13,334 --> 01:32:16,253 - This could be the easy place! - Oh, God. 1168 01:32:17,129 --> 01:32:21,842 We did the best we could. Let's just leave the herd and get the hell outta here, huh? 1169 01:32:22,217 --> 01:32:24,845 No. A cowboy doesn't leave his herd. 1170 01:32:25,763 --> 01:32:28,307 You are a sporting-goods salesman! 1171 01:32:31,143 --> 01:32:32,686 Not today. 1172 01:32:38,442 --> 01:32:40,027 Easy... OK. 1173 01:32:41,862 --> 01:32:44,740 I started this... and I'm gonna finish it. 1174 01:32:45,783 --> 01:32:47,743 I'm gonna finish it. 1175 01:32:54,750 --> 01:32:58,170 It's fast, but it's not deep. Come on, bring'em down. 1176 01:32:59,630 --> 01:33:01,715 Come on! Let's go! 1177 01:33:08,639 --> 01:33:10,099 Oh, God. 1178 01:33:34,123 --> 01:33:36,208 Come on, move! Move it! 1179 01:33:44,216 --> 01:33:46,260 Move it, now. Come on. 1180 01:33:48,095 --> 01:33:49,430 Whoa! 1181 01:33:51,557 --> 01:33:52,891 Shit. 1182 01:34:08,365 --> 01:34:12,286 Come on, boys! Come on, now. Move it! Moo cow! 1183 01:34:12,661 --> 01:34:14,580 Go, baby! Go, baby! 1184 01:34:14,830 --> 01:34:18,751 Hey, Phil. I'm 39 and I'm saying "moo cow" in a river. 1185 01:34:19,627 --> 01:34:21,587 Do you believe this? 1186 01:34:22,129 --> 01:34:24,089 - We did it! - Hey! 1187 01:34:39,897 --> 01:34:41,190 Yah! 1188 01:34:45,361 --> 01:34:46,945 Here we go! 1189 01:34:52,326 --> 01:34:53,744 Norman! 1190 01:34:55,454 --> 01:34:56,914 Oh, God. 1191 01:35:31,949 --> 01:35:33,283 Whoa! 1192 01:35:43,043 --> 01:35:44,461 Norman! 1193 01:35:46,964 --> 01:35:48,382 Norman! 1194 01:35:51,135 --> 01:35:52,886 Norman! Norman! 1195 01:35:54,430 --> 01:35:55,848 Norman! 1196 01:35:59,810 --> 01:36:01,520 Got you. Help! 1197 01:36:02,813 --> 01:36:04,690 Oh, my God. Mitch! 1198 01:36:04,732 --> 01:36:07,359 - Hey, Ed! - Help! Help me! 1199 01:36:10,654 --> 01:36:12,072 Oh, no. 1200 01:36:17,244 --> 01:36:18,620 Mitch! 1201 01:36:37,139 --> 01:36:38,641 Oh, shit. 1202 01:37:12,466 --> 01:37:14,051 I'm coming! 1203 01:37:14,969 --> 01:37:16,553 I'm coming! 1204 01:37:24,269 --> 01:37:26,105 Come on! Come on! 1205 01:37:26,855 --> 01:37:28,691 Come on! Come on! 1206 01:37:45,958 --> 01:37:48,460 Gimme your hand. Gimme your hand. 1207 01:37:55,801 --> 01:37:59,888 You're crazy. You talk about me, but you're crazy. 1208 01:38:01,473 --> 01:38:04,810 - You coulda been killed! - We almost lost you, pal. 1209 01:38:14,111 --> 01:38:15,696 Nice catch. 1210 01:38:17,614 --> 01:38:20,451 It was like Mays in the '54 World Series. 1211 01:38:21,410 --> 01:38:23,620 - Vic Wertz. - Vic Wertz. 1212 01:39:40,531 --> 01:39:42,992 - Let's bring'em in. - Yee-ha! 1213 01:39:53,210 --> 01:39:55,337 Great gobs of gooseshit! 1214 01:39:56,422 --> 01:39:58,382 It's them! Ira! Ira! 1215 01:40:26,452 --> 01:40:28,078 Yahoo! 1216 01:40:49,975 --> 01:40:51,310 Whoo! 1217 01:41:02,404 --> 01:41:04,073 Whoo! Yee-ha! 1218 01:41:12,164 --> 01:41:13,540 Yahoo! 1219 01:41:15,501 --> 01:41:16,877 Yahoo! 1220 01:41:22,091 --> 01:41:23,884 Way to go, guys. 1221 01:41:26,387 --> 01:41:28,013 - Hi. - Hi. 1222 01:41:35,187 --> 01:41:37,022 Oh, Lordy, Lordy. 1223 01:41:41,443 --> 01:41:45,197 - Here's your herd. - I'm as happy as a puppy with two peters. 1224 01:41:45,990 --> 01:41:48,200 We had a search party out lookin' for you. 1225 01:41:48,200 --> 01:41:51,286 - They didn't find us. - Un-by-God-believable. 1226 01:41:52,204 --> 01:41:54,873 Bunch o' tenderfeet bringin' in a herd. 1227 01:41:54,873 --> 01:41:58,419 Two weeks ago, you boys were as worthless as henshit on a pump handle. 1228 01:41:58,419 --> 01:42:00,212 Look at you now! 1229 01:42:00,337 --> 01:42:03,257 - I'm givin' your money back! 1230 01:42:04,133 --> 01:42:06,302 Now you're talking, Clay. 1231 01:42:06,760 --> 01:42:10,723 Instead of the money, you think my dad and I could come back and... 1232 01:42:10,764 --> 01:42:13,767 ...take the cattle back to New Mexico? - Really, son? 1233 01:42:13,767 --> 01:42:17,438 Ordinarily, that'd be great, but this herd's not goin' back. 1234 01:42:18,105 --> 01:42:19,106 What do you mean? 1235 01:42:19,106 --> 01:42:22,151 I'm gettin' top dollar from the meat company. 1236 01:42:23,110 --> 01:42:27,031 - You mean these cows are... - I thought you just moved'em around? 1237 01:42:27,031 --> 01:42:30,701 Usually do, but prices are sky high, and I can't pass it up. 1238 01:42:36,582 --> 01:42:40,294 Look, folks, it's not like any of'em have a lot to live for. 1239 01:42:40,794 --> 01:42:42,796 They don't have much of a life, anyway. 1240 01:42:42,796 --> 01:42:46,300 - Phil doesn't, but we wouldn't eat him. - That's right. 1241 01:42:46,550 --> 01:42:50,262 This is our business, son. This is not an endangered species. 1242 01:42:52,181 --> 01:42:54,183 It's what these animals are bred for. 1243 01:42:54,183 --> 01:42:58,604 All that meat under Cellophane in the store, where do you think it comes from? 1244 01:42:58,937 --> 01:43:01,231 Come on, fellas. Just relax. 1245 01:43:01,357 --> 01:43:03,400 You done real good, cowboys. 1246 01:43:03,400 --> 01:43:05,361 Let's get some grub. 1247 01:43:22,503 --> 01:43:24,546 These cows trusted us. 1248 01:43:25,297 --> 01:43:28,175 They trusted us? They don't even know us! 1249 01:43:28,801 --> 01:43:31,762 They followed us because we yelled "Yah". 1250 01:43:31,804 --> 01:43:33,555 They're cattle. 1251 01:44:25,858 --> 01:44:27,192 What? 1252 01:45:05,272 --> 01:45:08,025 I've gotta stop bein' a schmuck. 1253 01:45:08,317 --> 01:45:10,736 You know, you were right, Mitch. 1254 01:45:10,736 --> 01:45:14,031 My life is a "do over". It's time to get started. 1255 01:45:17,326 --> 01:45:19,203 I hope I can help. 1256 01:45:21,330 --> 01:45:23,290 I'm gonna go home... 1257 01:45:23,832 --> 01:45:25,834 ...and I'm gonna get Kim pregnant. 1258 01:45:25,834 --> 01:45:29,296 - I hope I can help. - Oh, Mitchy the Kid's in trouble. 1259 01:45:32,967 --> 01:45:35,094 - What about you? - Hm? 1260 01:45:35,469 --> 01:45:38,806 - You gonna be OK? - Yeah. Cos I know what he meant. 1261 01:45:39,473 --> 01:45:42,142 - Who? - Curly. I know what this is. 1262 01:45:42,977 --> 01:45:45,479 - What? - That's what you have to figure out. 1263 01:45:45,479 --> 01:45:47,982 - I'm gonna deck you, pal. - No, that's what it is. 1264 01:45:47,982 --> 01:45:51,485 It's different for everybody. It's whatever's most important to you. 1265 01:45:51,485 --> 01:45:55,531 For me, when I was in the river, I was only thinkin' about one thing. 1266 01:45:55,990 --> 01:45:58,617 All that other stuff just went away. 1267 01:45:58,993 --> 01:46:01,662 Only one thing really mattered to me. 1268 01:46:02,496 --> 01:46:04,832 - Dad! - Daddy, you're home! 1269 01:46:09,586 --> 01:46:11,171 I love you. 1270 01:46:12,589 --> 01:46:14,591 These faces. I missed these faces. 1271 01:46:14,591 --> 01:46:18,012 - We missed you too, Daddy. - It's no fun without you. 1272 01:46:18,595 --> 01:46:20,347 Hey, buckaroos. 1273 01:46:22,099 --> 01:46:24,518 - Next year, the North Pole. - What? 1274 01:46:24,518 --> 01:46:27,938 We hire dog sleds and follow the same route as Admiral Byrd. 1275 01:46:27,938 --> 01:46:29,148 Uh-huh. 1276 01:46:29,148 --> 01:46:31,525 Next Tuesday, coffee and cake. 1277 01:46:32,568 --> 01:46:33,485 Better. 1278 01:46:33,485 --> 01:46:35,029 Come here. 1279 01:46:39,450 --> 01:46:41,535 Hey, Phil! You need a ride? 1280 01:46:41,535 --> 01:46:43,662 No, thanks. I got a cab. 1281 01:46:59,136 --> 01:47:02,097 - So, how are you? - Good. Things are good. 1282 01:47:04,099 --> 01:47:05,976 Look what I found. 1283 01:47:07,436 --> 01:47:09,813 Mm, that's nice. Where was it? 1284 01:47:10,439 --> 01:47:14,693 Colorado. I mean, it's always the last place you look. 1285 01:47:16,528 --> 01:47:18,739 Mitch, I've been thinking. 1286 01:47:19,531 --> 01:47:22,534 If you really hate your job, why don't you get out of there? 1287 01:47:22,534 --> 01:47:25,954 - We'll be all right. - No. I'm not gonna quit my job. 1288 01:47:27,081 --> 01:47:30,751 I'm just gonna do it better. I'm gonna do everything better. 1289 01:47:31,627 --> 01:47:33,212 Everything? 1290 01:47:49,520 --> 01:47:50,813 See? 1291 01:47:51,814 --> 01:47:54,650 - Oh, I missed you. - I missed you, too. 1292 01:47:55,818 --> 01:47:57,319 Let's go home. 1293 01:47:57,319 --> 01:48:00,698 Today... is my best day. 1294 01:48:06,120 --> 01:48:07,705 Mr Robbins? 1295 01:48:08,580 --> 01:48:10,416 Yeah, right here. 1296 01:48:11,667 --> 01:48:13,377 This is great. 1297 01:48:14,878 --> 01:48:17,089 - There you go. - Thanks. 1298 01:48:17,381 --> 01:48:20,342 - What, did you get a dog? - We got a dog?! 1299 01:48:20,342 --> 01:48:22,970 - All right! - Come on, little man. 1300 01:48:26,265 --> 01:48:28,434 Everyone, this is Norman. 1301 01:48:31,145 --> 01:48:33,230 - It's a cow. - Uh-uh. 1302 01:48:33,605 --> 01:48:35,607 He's a calf, actually. 1303 01:48:35,607 --> 01:48:38,360 Mitch! You're gonna put him in the van? 1304 01:48:39,945 --> 01:48:41,864 Oh, yeah. And then the den. 1305 01:48:41,864 --> 01:48:45,951 - You're not gonna take him home. - See, kids, he just said "Hello". 1306 01:48:46,869 --> 01:48:50,372 Just for a little while. Then we'll put him in a petting zoo... 1307 01:48:50,372 --> 01:48:53,334 ...so he can be with your mother. - Mitch! 1308 01:48:54,877 --> 01:48:57,254 I'm kidding! I'm just kidding. 1309 01:49:03,385 --> 01:49:06,472 - OK, seat belts, Norman. Seat belts. - Mitch! 1310 01:49:06,889 --> 01:49:10,225 I hope you went to the bathroom. We got a long ride. 1311 01:49:10,392 --> 01:49:12,603 - Mitch! - Let's go home.