1
00:03:25,914 --> 00:03:27,637
You sell crack?
2
00:03:30,170 --> 00:03:33,202
No, it's cool. I'm only a cop on TV.
3
00:03:33,273 --> 00:03:35,662
How much... right on.
4
00:03:53,206 --> 00:03:54,896
Is this crack?
5
00:03:54,965 --> 00:03:56,307
You know how to do it?
6
00:05:00,107 --> 00:05:01,601
Yes. Yes, hello.
7
00:05:02,827 --> 00:05:04,833
I'm having a medical situation.
8
00:05:07,370 --> 00:05:10,686
Yeah, okay,
I don't have a belly button.
9
00:05:13,033 --> 00:05:18,269
I do not have a belly button
where I should on my belly,
10
00:05:18,344 --> 00:05:21,410
and I'm concerned
because I don't know if that's...
11
00:05:22,791 --> 00:05:26,369
Can a person live
without a belly button?
12
00:05:26,438 --> 00:05:28,707
'Cause if you think about it,
you're born with one...
13
00:05:30,342 --> 00:05:33,375
and if you don't have one
you're unborn,
14
00:05:33,446 --> 00:05:36,828
and it's really hazy
whether you're alive or not.
15
00:05:36,900 --> 00:05:40,064
I guess I'm wondering...
16
00:05:41,316 --> 00:05:42,777
...am I alive?
17
00:05:45,828 --> 00:05:47,289
Or what if I'm God?
18
00:05:49,283 --> 00:05:51,355
I don't think I need an ambulance,
19
00:05:51,427 --> 00:05:53,401
but I should probably
go to the hospital.
20
00:05:54,434 --> 00:05:55,710
Yeah, I should.
21
00:06:47,065 --> 00:06:49,301
Like you've never done worse!
22
00:06:49,369 --> 00:06:51,540
Okay, yes, he totaled a car,
23
00:06:51,609 --> 00:06:53,681
but it was
an environmentally friendly car.
24
00:06:53,752 --> 00:06:55,213
Why doesn't that
get reported?
25
00:06:55,288 --> 00:06:58,637
He was heartbroken, betrayed.
26
00:06:58,711 --> 00:07:02,060
You say you understand,
but you don't... you can't.
27
00:07:02,135 --> 00:07:04,523
You're like a big, giant Vulcan.
28
00:07:04,598 --> 00:07:06,256
He's coming.
I'll call you later.
29
00:07:06,326 --> 00:07:10,700
Hi. Margaret.
I work for Lola.
30
00:07:10,773 --> 00:07:13,107
- Gary.
- I know.
31
00:07:14,069 --> 00:07:15,563
We need to go out the back.
32
00:07:18,260 --> 00:07:21,009
- Are there reporters out front?
- A few.
33
00:07:21,076 --> 00:07:23,530
Not Hugh Grant level,
more like Robert Downey Jr.
34
00:07:23,603 --> 00:07:26,636
When he broke into that family's house
and slept in the kid's bed.
35
00:07:26,707 --> 00:07:29,096
I handled episodes two
through four for Robert,
36
00:07:29,170 --> 00:07:31,374
so this sort of thing
is my specialty.
37
00:07:32,562 --> 00:07:35,878
Okay, just so it's said,
this house is flammable.
38
00:07:35,954 --> 00:07:38,288
I didn't mean
to burn down my house.
39
00:07:38,353 --> 00:07:41,451
Yeah, and I didn't mean to eat my way
into a ten-year shame spiral,
40
00:07:41,553 --> 00:07:44,235
but I did, and it's healthier
to acknowledge it.
41
00:07:44,272 --> 00:07:46,214
So, this flammable house
42
00:07:46,287 --> 00:07:48,970
belongs to one of Lola's
other fabulous clients,
43
00:07:49,039 --> 00:07:51,854
who is currently shooting
a pilot in Toronto.
44
00:07:51,919 --> 00:07:54,286
- An actor?
- Writer.
45
00:07:54,351 --> 00:07:58,660
So, for the next six weeks,
su casa es su casa.
46
00:07:58,734 --> 00:08:00,359
I say feel free to wear his clothes.
47
00:08:00,429 --> 00:08:02,884
He'll probably get
a sick thrill out of it.
48
00:08:02,957 --> 00:08:03,971
The gays.
49
00:08:04,045 --> 00:08:05,190
He has dogs.
50
00:08:05,261 --> 00:08:07,115
Yeah, they're away at summer camp.
51
00:08:07,181 --> 00:08:08,522
Now, try the bed.
52
00:08:15,083 --> 00:08:16,489
It's fine.
53
00:08:16,555 --> 00:08:19,075
- Comfortable?
- Sure.
54
00:08:19,147 --> 00:08:24,383
Look, Gary, I know this
has been crazy and stressful.
55
00:08:24,458 --> 00:08:27,359
I want you to feel
safe and comfortable.
56
00:08:27,433 --> 00:08:30,084
- I do.
- I'm a fan of yours, you know.
57
00:08:30,153 --> 00:08:31,974
Your number-one fan!
58
00:08:32,040 --> 00:08:33,894
But if you fuck this up,
59
00:08:33,959 --> 00:08:36,195
I will smash your ankles
with a sledgehammer.
60
00:08:38,023 --> 00:08:40,608
And that wouldn't be comfortable
for either one of us.
61
00:08:42,566 --> 00:08:44,606
Nine dogs ran through the field.
62
00:08:47,301 --> 00:08:48,927
The koala sits in the tree.
63
00:08:52,901 --> 00:08:54,592
It's computer voice-recognition.
64
00:08:54,661 --> 00:08:57,475
The parole system can call
you any time, day or night.
65
00:08:57,540 --> 00:08:59,395
If you don't pick up
within five rings,
66
00:08:59,460 --> 00:09:02,209
the police come
and haul your ass off.
67
00:09:02,275 --> 00:09:03,551
What if I'm not here?
68
00:09:04,611 --> 00:09:06,520
That's why they call it
"house arrest."
69
00:09:06,594 --> 00:09:09,212
You stay inside your house.
70
00:09:10,562 --> 00:09:12,285
He can take direction,
I promise.
71
00:09:13,537 --> 00:09:15,871
I'll be coming by twice a day
to check up on you.
72
00:09:15,937 --> 00:09:17,912
I should be
the only person coming by...
73
00:09:17,985 --> 00:09:20,854
no pals, no buddies,
no heroin dealers.
74
00:09:20,928 --> 00:09:22,205
I don't do heroin.
75
00:09:22,272 --> 00:09:24,573
Yeah, crack is classy.
76
00:09:24,639 --> 00:09:26,013
And I'm not buying you porn.
77
00:09:26,080 --> 00:09:27,770
There's spray-per-view
on cable.
78
00:09:27,839 --> 00:09:29,846
Great, 'cause I really
wasn't concerned
79
00:09:29,919 --> 00:09:32,220
about my career,
family, or future.
80
00:09:32,286 --> 00:09:35,286
- I just wanted to jerk off.
- Let me see your phone.
81
00:09:39,582 --> 00:09:41,370
Come on, all my numbers
are in there.
82
00:09:41,437 --> 00:09:42,866
Dial ten digits at random.
83
00:09:42,941 --> 00:09:45,907
Whoever answers will be better
than the people on that phone.
84
00:09:45,980 --> 00:09:48,533
You have my cell number,
you have delivery menus.
85
00:09:48,604 --> 00:09:50,359
You're fine, right?
86
00:09:53,051 --> 00:09:54,229
Bad idea.
87
00:09:56,506 --> 00:09:57,553
Be good!
88
00:11:05,071 --> 00:11:06,019
Keep it.
89
00:11:08,943 --> 00:11:11,877
Someone was trying
to destroy the evidence.
90
00:11:11,950 --> 00:11:13,379
Someone failed.
91
00:11:14,382 --> 00:11:16,770
Once we get these samples
back to the crime lab...
92
00:11:18,189 --> 00:11:20,044
we'll know
who the real killer is.
93
00:12:35,136 --> 00:12:36,346
Somebody there?
94
00:12:38,080 --> 00:12:39,192
Hello!
95
00:12:54,878 --> 00:12:55,826
Hello?
96
00:12:57,181 --> 00:12:58,457
Yes.
97
00:13:02,748 --> 00:13:04,690
Nine leopards
ran through the jungle.
98
00:13:07,323 --> 00:13:09,330
I bought two cakes
at the store.
99
00:13:13,371 --> 00:13:14,931
The house is haunted.
100
00:13:15,002 --> 00:13:17,106
There's a zeitgeist
or some...
101
00:13:17,177 --> 00:13:18,770
Poltergeist, and no.
102
00:13:18,841 --> 00:13:21,208
Maybe they were rats.
L.A.'s teeming with rats.
103
00:13:21,273 --> 00:13:22,679
They live in the palm trees.
104
00:13:23,736 --> 00:13:24,816
Maybe.
105
00:13:25,912 --> 00:13:28,300
Okay, you know,
I'm a licensed psychotherapist.
106
00:13:28,376 --> 00:13:29,805
Really?
107
00:13:29,880 --> 00:13:31,984
No, I'm a publicist.
108
00:13:32,055 --> 00:13:33,965
My job is what
other people think of you,
109
00:13:34,038 --> 00:13:36,885
not what you think of yourself,
so pull your shit together.
110
00:13:36,950 --> 00:13:38,227
I am this close to getting
111
00:13:38,294 --> 00:13:40,530
Christine Walsh to do
your piece in Parade.
112
00:13:40,598 --> 00:13:42,834
Parade? I fucking hate Parade.
113
00:13:42,901 --> 00:13:44,210
Everybody hates Parade,
114
00:13:44,277 --> 00:13:47,724
but the people that watch Crim9 Lab
love their Marilyn Vos Savant.
115
00:13:47,796 --> 00:13:51,091
One heartfelt act of contrition,
and maybe the show writer
116
00:13:51,156 --> 00:13:53,578
won't kill off your character
between seasons.
117
00:13:53,651 --> 00:13:55,887
I swear to God,
if you go bat-shit on me...
118
00:13:55,956 --> 00:13:57,133
I'm not crazy.
119
00:13:58,099 --> 00:14:00,073
Exactly. Exactly.
120
00:14:20,015 --> 00:14:22,316
Sorry! I'm sorry.
121
00:14:23,311 --> 00:14:25,415
Over here, to your left.
122
00:14:25,486 --> 00:14:27,591
Right. Sorry, right.
123
00:14:27,662 --> 00:14:31,207
I was practicing my putting,
if you can believe that.
124
00:14:31,277 --> 00:14:32,292
Not really.
125
00:14:36,109 --> 00:14:38,116
Okay, maybe I was
just looking for a way
126
00:14:38,189 --> 00:14:39,595
to meet my infamous neighbor.
127
00:14:41,068 --> 00:14:43,075
You see, I'm under house arrest too.
128
00:14:43,147 --> 00:14:44,521
What'd you do?
129
00:14:45,611 --> 00:14:47,400
I had sex with my husband.
130
00:14:50,571 --> 00:14:52,065
That's awful.
131
00:14:52,138 --> 00:14:54,657
Nine months later,
I had Jaden.
132
00:14:54,729 --> 00:14:55,809
That's her over there.
133
00:14:55,881 --> 00:14:57,669
She's a cutie.
134
00:14:57,737 --> 00:15:00,006
She's sleeping for another...
135
00:15:01,321 --> 00:15:03,808
Seventeen minutes.
She likes to keep to a schedule.
136
00:15:03,880 --> 00:15:05,309
She seems really boring.
137
00:15:05,384 --> 00:15:06,528
She is.
138
00:15:08,392 --> 00:15:09,766
You're rich.
139
00:15:10,855 --> 00:15:12,862
Shouldn't you have
a nanny from Ecuador?
140
00:15:12,935 --> 00:15:14,495
I'm Canadian.
141
00:15:15,462 --> 00:15:17,251
Can't work in the U.S.
142
00:15:17,318 --> 00:15:20,666
Plus, I want to keep
this air of moral superiority
143
00:15:20,774 --> 00:15:22,596
by doing everything myself.
144
00:15:22,629 --> 00:15:23,577
Very Canadian.
145
00:15:23,653 --> 00:15:24,602
Thanks.
146
00:15:29,156 --> 00:15:32,123
Jaden goes down again
around 2:30.
147
00:15:32,196 --> 00:15:33,505
Maybe I could stop by?
148
00:15:33,571 --> 00:15:35,229
I'm pretty sure I'll be here.
149
00:15:36,611 --> 00:15:37,625
It's a date.
150
00:15:37,699 --> 00:15:39,008
Is it?
151
00:15:43,681 --> 00:15:46,364
- I'm Sarah, by the way.
- Gary.
152
00:15:47,425 --> 00:15:48,472
Yeah, I know.
153
00:17:43,758 --> 00:17:46,441
"The best of all possible worlds."
154
00:17:47,949 --> 00:17:49,225
Okay.
155
00:17:49,293 --> 00:17:52,359
Voltaire, Candide.
Are you actually reading it?
156
00:17:53,420 --> 00:17:54,827
I thought I was.
157
00:17:55,788 --> 00:17:58,089
Sorry I bailed.
Jaden had a fever.
158
00:17:58,155 --> 00:17:59,682
How boring of her.
159
00:18:00,620 --> 00:18:01,929
Housewarming gift!
160
00:18:02,923 --> 00:18:04,133
Demon liquor.
161
00:18:04,203 --> 00:18:07,399
And the best part is I can drink it.
I pumped before I came.
162
00:18:07,466 --> 00:18:08,808
So did I.
163
00:18:09,834 --> 00:18:11,589
It's hard to prove
that I was only trying
164
00:18:11,689 --> 00:18:14,110
to burn my ex-girlfriend's stuff
and not the entire house.
165
00:18:14,153 --> 00:18:16,095
Yeah, fire's tricky that way.
166
00:18:16,169 --> 00:18:18,372
Yeah. How 'bout you?
167
00:18:18,441 --> 00:18:20,328
Any history of arson?
168
00:18:21,287 --> 00:18:22,596
Strangely enough...
169
00:18:24,167 --> 00:18:26,239
I knew it. I could see
that little spark.
170
00:18:26,311 --> 00:18:28,612
Well, it wasn't arson, probably.
171
00:18:30,886 --> 00:18:33,341
When I was a little girl,
our house caught on fire.
172
00:18:33,413 --> 00:18:34,591
Oh, shit.
173
00:18:34,662 --> 00:18:37,117
I'll never forget the look
on my father's face
174
00:18:37,190 --> 00:18:39,164
as he gathered me up
in his arms and raced
175
00:18:39,237 --> 00:18:42,051
through the burning building
out onto the pavement.
176
00:18:43,140 --> 00:18:45,311
I stood there,
shivering in my pajamas,
177
00:18:45,379 --> 00:18:48,379
and watched the whole world
go up in flames.
178
00:18:49,763 --> 00:18:53,058
And when it was over,
I said to myself,
179
00:18:53,122 --> 00:18:56,951
"Is that all there is to a fire?"
180
00:18:57,026 --> 00:18:59,579
Is that all there is?
181
00:19:00,641 --> 00:19:04,186
Is that all there is?
182
00:19:04,257 --> 00:19:06,875
Is that all there is?
183
00:19:07,840 --> 00:19:11,418
If that's all there is, my friends
184
00:19:11,488 --> 00:19:15,513
Then let's keep dancing
185
00:19:15,583 --> 00:19:18,201
Let's break out the booze
186
00:19:18,270 --> 00:19:21,269
And have a ball
187
00:19:23,262 --> 00:19:30,135
If that's all there is
188
00:19:31,260 --> 00:19:34,423
And then I met
the most wonderful boy in the world.
189
00:19:34,492 --> 00:19:37,142
We would take long walks
by the river.
190
00:19:37,211 --> 00:19:39,829
We'd sit for hours
gazing into each other's eyes.
191
00:19:39,899 --> 00:19:41,873
We were so very much in love.
192
00:19:42,842 --> 00:19:45,231
And then one day he went away,
193
00:19:45,306 --> 00:19:48,240
and I thought I'd die, but I didn't.
194
00:19:48,314 --> 00:19:51,958
And when I didn't, I said to myself,
195
00:19:52,025 --> 00:19:55,734
"Is that all there is to love?"
196
00:19:58,520 --> 00:20:02,131
Is that all there is
197
00:20:02,264 --> 00:20:05,525
Is that all there is
198
00:20:05,591 --> 00:20:08,939
If that's all there is, my friends
199
00:20:09,046 --> 00:20:10,933
Then let's keep...
200
00:20:11,862 --> 00:20:13,204
I know what you're thinking.
201
00:20:13,270 --> 00:20:17,164
If that's the way she feels about it,
why doesn't she just end it all?
202
00:20:17,237 --> 00:20:18,643
Oh, no.
203
00:20:18,709 --> 00:20:22,799
I'm in no hurry
for that final disappointment.
204
00:20:22,868 --> 00:20:27,145
I know as sure as I'm
standing here talking to you,
205
00:20:27,220 --> 00:20:28,943
that when
that final moment comes
206
00:20:29,011 --> 00:20:31,050
and I'm breathing my last breath,
207
00:20:31,122 --> 00:20:33,904
I'll be saying to myself...
208
00:20:33,970 --> 00:20:37,286
Is that all there is
209
00:20:37,426 --> 00:20:40,142
Is that all there is
210
00:20:41,233 --> 00:20:44,778
If that's all there is, my friends
211
00:20:44,849 --> 00:20:48,165
Then let's keep dancing
212
00:20:48,239 --> 00:20:54,316
Let's break out the booze
and have a ball
213
00:20:56,207 --> 00:20:58,923
If that's all...
214
00:21:00,430 --> 00:21:03,331
- I need to go.
- What?
215
00:21:04,845 --> 00:21:06,089
Sorry, sorry.
216
00:21:06,157 --> 00:21:07,367
Where are my shoes?
217
00:21:07,436 --> 00:21:09,029
- Wait, just...
- Sorry.
218
00:21:09,101 --> 00:21:10,988
Don't worry about it. Just...
219
00:21:11,052 --> 00:21:13,507
I should go. Good-bye.
220
00:21:13,580 --> 00:21:14,594
You coming back?
221
00:22:07,011 --> 00:22:10,207
And if that mockingbird won't sing
222
00:22:10,275 --> 00:22:14,202
Mama's gonna buy you
a diamond ring
223
00:22:14,273 --> 00:22:17,306
And if that cart and bull fall down
224
00:22:17,377 --> 00:22:21,654
You'll still be the sweetest
little baby in town
225
00:22:21,729 --> 00:22:23,103
Good night, sweetheart.
226
00:22:23,168 --> 00:22:24,150
Good night.
227
00:22:27,200 --> 00:22:29,534
The cat says, "Meow."
228
00:22:29,599 --> 00:22:31,704
The pig says, "Oink."
229
00:22:31,775 --> 00:22:34,709
The cow says, "Moo."
230
00:22:34,846 --> 00:22:37,628
The cow says, "Moo."
231
00:22:37,758 --> 00:22:40,507
The cow says, "Moo."
232
00:22:40,574 --> 00:22:42,907
The dog says, "Nine.
233
00:22:42,973 --> 00:22:47,380
Nine, nine, nine, nine."
234
00:22:49,980 --> 00:22:50,929
Hello?
235
00:22:52,188 --> 00:22:53,300
Yes.
236
00:22:56,283 --> 00:22:58,486
Two trains run through the forest.
237
00:23:04,474 --> 00:23:09,208
Nine, nine, nine, nine, nine...
238
00:23:53,649 --> 00:23:54,958
Fuck.
239
00:24:00,401 --> 00:24:02,702
Jesus, you scared
the shit out of me.
240
00:24:07,280 --> 00:24:10,246
What... I don't... I'm sorry.
241
00:24:10,318 --> 00:24:12,140
Oh, no, I'm...
242
00:24:13,262 --> 00:24:15,302
I'm fine. I'll be fine, yeah.
243
00:24:18,030 --> 00:24:19,720
Where are your parents?
244
00:24:22,444 --> 00:24:25,161
No, no, no, your mom and dad.
Where's your mom and dad?
245
00:24:28,043 --> 00:24:29,701
I don't know what you're saying.
246
00:24:29,771 --> 00:24:32,160
Look, hey, look,
I don't speak that,
247
00:24:32,236 --> 00:24:36,741
so just go back
to wherever you came from.
248
00:24:36,810 --> 00:24:39,363
You shouldn't be out here.
No, no, no. Go...
249
00:24:39,434 --> 00:24:42,216
It's not safe for you to be out here.
You should go back, okay?
250
00:24:49,576 --> 00:24:50,754
Oh, shit.
251
00:25:00,711 --> 00:25:02,598
Evening, Officers.
252
00:25:07,525 --> 00:25:11,780
Once again, house arrest means
you stay inside your house.
253
00:25:11,844 --> 00:25:13,668
Think of it like
an electronic leash.
254
00:25:13,668 --> 00:25:14,334
Think of it like
an electronic leash.
255
00:25:15,364 --> 00:25:18,233
If you even go more than
100 feet from the base station,
256
00:25:18,308 --> 00:25:20,413
the cops come,
and they throw your ass in jail.
257
00:25:20,483 --> 00:25:22,490
If you ever try to take it off,
the cops come,
258
00:25:22,563 --> 00:25:24,024
and they throw your ass in jail.
259
00:25:24,099 --> 00:25:26,782
If they ever detect drugs
or alcohol in your system...
260
00:25:26,850 --> 00:25:29,151
Cops come.
Throw my ass in jail.
261
00:25:29,218 --> 00:25:32,087
No, I kick your ass.
262
00:25:32,161 --> 00:25:34,233
Then the cops come
and throw your ass in jail.
263
00:25:34,305 --> 00:25:35,832
Do I still have to answer the phone?
264
00:25:35,905 --> 00:25:38,555
I'll be doing that from now on.
I'm moving into the guest room.
265
00:25:38,624 --> 00:25:39,998
I don't need a babysitter.
266
00:25:40,960 --> 00:25:43,065
Despite all evidence
to the contrary.
267
00:25:43,136 --> 00:25:44,957
Don't worry,
I'm a cool roomie.
268
00:25:45,024 --> 00:25:47,925
Who do you think taught
Affleck how to gamble?
269
00:25:53,438 --> 00:25:55,990
Let's never hear that again!
270
00:25:56,061 --> 00:26:00,251
...ninety-seven,
ninety-eight, ninety-nine.
271
00:26:00,317 --> 00:26:02,040
One hundred feet.
272
00:26:04,476 --> 00:26:06,843
Behold, the edge of your world.
273
00:26:06,907 --> 00:26:08,849
In the world,
out of the world.
274
00:26:08,987 --> 00:26:10,547
In the world,
out of the world...
275
00:26:12,922 --> 00:26:14,264
Hey, I'm dancing!
276
00:26:18,425 --> 00:26:20,083
Sure, absolutely.
277
00:26:20,153 --> 00:26:22,608
So the guy's like,
"Do you know fencing?"
278
00:26:22,681 --> 00:26:25,047
And I say, "That's what it says
on my headshot."
279
00:26:25,113 --> 00:26:27,665
- Lies.
- Oh, always. Always.
280
00:26:27,736 --> 00:26:30,550
So he says to me,
"Foil or epi?"
281
00:26:30,616 --> 00:26:32,950
- Ep�e!
- And I say I'm about equal in both...
282
00:26:33,016 --> 00:26:34,444
- Which is true!
- Exactly.
283
00:26:34,519 --> 00:26:37,814
Anyway, he throws me
this fucking Conan sword, right?
284
00:26:38,806 --> 00:26:42,319
And then he just starts
going after me.
285
00:26:42,390 --> 00:26:43,338
I'm just swinging.
286
00:26:43,414 --> 00:26:45,901
I'm just trying to stay alive,
right, with my eyes closed,
287
00:26:45,973 --> 00:26:48,144
and I end up accidentally
cutting his ear.
288
00:26:48,213 --> 00:26:49,325
You cut off his ear?
289
00:26:49,429 --> 00:26:51,632
Yeah... well, no, no,
just a little, right.
290
00:26:51,668 --> 00:26:53,326
But I ended up getting the job.
291
00:26:53,396 --> 00:26:55,632
Wait, you were in
Pirates of the Caribbean?
292
00:26:55,700 --> 00:26:57,522
Yeah. No, no.
293
00:26:57,587 --> 00:26:59,529
No, not the movie, the ride.
294
00:26:59,603 --> 00:27:03,661
I was all, like, "Arr, keep
both hands inside the boat."
295
00:27:05,522 --> 00:27:07,627
Don't. No finger.
296
00:27:07,698 --> 00:27:09,192
Good night, fuckface.
297
00:27:09,265 --> 00:27:10,727
Good night, you filthy whore.
298
00:27:17,040 --> 00:27:18,567
It's incredible.
299
00:27:18,640 --> 00:27:22,950
Whenever I see them,
I always feel like... damn.
300
00:27:23,023 --> 00:27:24,550
I was born at the wrong time.
301
00:27:24,623 --> 00:27:26,313
Exactly.
302
00:28:01,929 --> 00:28:04,318
- Where's the warden?
- Groceries.
303
00:28:04,393 --> 00:28:05,887
Quite the little missus.
304
00:28:08,584 --> 00:28:10,755
- How's Jaden?
- Boring.
305
00:28:10,824 --> 00:28:13,791
We haven't had nearly the grand old time
you two have been having.
306
00:28:13,863 --> 00:28:14,942
You've been watching.
307
00:28:15,015 --> 00:28:17,186
Well, I don't want
to meddle in your affairs.
308
00:28:17,254 --> 00:28:18,399
My affairs?
309
00:28:18,470 --> 00:28:20,258
Everyone needs affection.
I get it.
310
00:28:20,325 --> 00:28:22,845
I don't. Are you seriously jealous?
311
00:28:22,917 --> 00:28:25,851
The opposite.
I just want to protect her.
312
00:28:25,925 --> 00:28:28,772
- From what?
- From you.
313
00:28:28,836 --> 00:28:32,578
Look at you. You date models,
actresses, tennis players.
314
00:28:32,644 --> 00:28:33,593
Yeah?
315
00:28:33,667 --> 00:28:36,765
On a scale of one to ten,
you belong with the nines.
316
00:28:36,835 --> 00:28:38,875
We both know
you won't settle for less.
317
00:28:48,129 --> 00:28:49,274
What are the nines?
318
00:28:49,345 --> 00:28:50,555
What?
319
00:28:50,625 --> 00:28:51,901
"Look for the nines"?
320
00:28:54,592 --> 00:28:55,868
It's not mine.
321
00:28:55,936 --> 00:28:58,783
- It's your handwriting.
- I didn't write it.
322
00:28:58,848 --> 00:29:00,091
Okay.
323
00:29:13,149 --> 00:29:14,523
Allee... allee... all come free.
324
00:29:16,604 --> 00:29:17,553
What?
325
00:29:19,100 --> 00:29:20,213
Nothing.
326
00:29:20,284 --> 00:29:21,910
Seriously. What?
327
00:29:22,875 --> 00:29:25,330
Nothing. I thought you were...
328
00:29:26,555 --> 00:29:30,231
Forget it. Done. Sorry.
329
00:29:48,376 --> 00:29:51,474
Hiya. Hi.
330
00:29:51,543 --> 00:29:52,525
What?
331
00:29:53,623 --> 00:29:55,313
I have to take this.
332
00:29:55,382 --> 00:29:56,844
Who thought
it was a good idea
333
00:29:56,918 --> 00:29:58,805
to let Courtney
into a pottery shop?
334
00:30:45,134 --> 00:30:46,443
I know who you are.
335
00:30:49,613 --> 00:30:52,100
- Really.
- I know what you are.
336
00:30:52,173 --> 00:30:53,515
If you come near him again...
337
00:30:53,581 --> 00:30:54,825
You'll what?
338
00:30:56,396 --> 00:30:57,803
What are you gonna do about it?
339
00:31:00,300 --> 00:31:02,405
Sorry, what's he calling you?
340
00:31:02,476 --> 00:31:03,620
Margaret.
341
00:31:03,691 --> 00:31:06,855
I like that. Margaret. Classic.
342
00:31:06,923 --> 00:31:09,159
- Why don't you leave him alone?
- Alone?
343
00:31:09,226 --> 00:31:11,746
He can't be left alone.
He's an actor.
344
00:31:11,818 --> 00:31:15,134
If no one's watching him,
he doesn't really exist.
345
00:31:16,137 --> 00:31:17,762
And for the record...
346
00:31:19,176 --> 00:31:21,827
I'm not the one deceiving him.
347
00:31:22,856 --> 00:31:24,416
He'll figure it out eventually,
348
00:31:24,488 --> 00:31:26,942
and when he does, who do you
think he's going to blame?
349
00:31:44,805 --> 00:31:46,233
Good night, rat face.
350
00:31:47,204 --> 00:31:48,218
Good night.
351
00:32:31,421 --> 00:32:32,500
Hey, neighbor.
352
00:32:34,300 --> 00:32:37,595
Sorry for the psychotic episode.
353
00:32:37,692 --> 00:32:38,869
Okay.
354
00:32:39,803 --> 00:32:40,785
Are you okay?
355
00:32:40,859 --> 00:32:43,346
You look a little Beautiful Mind-ish.
356
00:32:45,435 --> 00:32:48,053
How many times should
the number nine come up?
357
00:32:49,210 --> 00:32:50,387
Probablistically?
358
00:32:50,457 --> 00:32:52,596
"Probablistically"?
359
00:32:52,666 --> 00:32:55,186
You know what I mean.
360
00:32:55,257 --> 00:32:57,296
One time out of ten.
361
00:32:57,368 --> 00:32:59,255
How about every time?
362
00:33:00,920 --> 00:33:03,702
But they only show up
when you look for them.
363
00:33:03,768 --> 00:33:06,735
Looking for them changes things.
364
00:33:09,142 --> 00:33:12,011
Some of these are prices,
and there's gonna be a lot of nines.
365
00:33:12,086 --> 00:33:14,290
There's something wrong.
366
00:33:15,702 --> 00:33:17,709
There's something wrong
with the world.
367
00:33:21,620 --> 00:33:25,198
I can get you out of here,
but you have to trust me.
368
00:33:26,196 --> 00:33:29,992
Good morning.
Everything okay?
369
00:33:31,059 --> 00:33:32,204
Peachy.
370
00:33:32,307 --> 00:33:34,281
Peachy's good.
I like peaches.
371
00:33:36,370 --> 00:33:38,028
You want coffee?
372
00:33:38,098 --> 00:33:39,592
Yeah.
373
00:33:48,304 --> 00:33:50,092
What do I do?
374
00:33:51,119 --> 00:33:52,842
Do you trust me?
375
00:34:09,964 --> 00:34:11,426
You okay?
376
00:34:11,500 --> 00:34:12,744
No.
377
00:34:14,507 --> 00:34:15,936
Tell me about the nines.
378
00:34:16,012 --> 00:34:17,866
The nines?
379
00:34:18,028 --> 00:34:19,304
The nines.
380
00:34:20,619 --> 00:34:22,180
It's sort of hard to start there.
381
00:34:22,250 --> 00:34:26,243
Try, and don't tell me
I'm imagining it,
382
00:34:26,314 --> 00:34:29,380
'cause they're showing up everywhere,
and I want to know why.
383
00:34:30,537 --> 00:34:31,747
Best guess?
384
00:34:31,817 --> 00:34:36,323
They're your subconscious
trying to remind you who you are.
385
00:34:39,656 --> 00:34:41,281
I'm a nine?
386
00:34:41,351 --> 00:34:42,660
Yes.
387
00:34:42,727 --> 00:34:45,378
Doesn't make much sense
out of context.
388
00:34:46,854 --> 00:34:49,123
You're not gonna
understand this yet, but...
389
00:34:50,182 --> 00:34:52,865
we've known each other
for, like, 25 years.
390
00:34:54,214 --> 00:34:56,417
One day when I was 12,
391
00:34:56,486 --> 00:34:58,624
you called me out of the blue
392
00:34:58,693 --> 00:35:01,213
and we've been talking
ever since.
393
00:35:01,285 --> 00:35:03,226
Talking.
394
00:35:03,300 --> 00:35:05,689
On the phone, usually.
395
00:35:05,764 --> 00:35:07,803
I never met you
before I came here.
396
00:35:10,051 --> 00:35:12,701
You, Gary, never met me, no,
397
00:35:12,770 --> 00:35:15,639
but you're not always...
398
00:35:16,738 --> 00:35:19,193
I can understand
why you're a little confused.
399
00:35:19,266 --> 00:35:20,672
No, no.
400
00:35:21,633 --> 00:35:24,316
I'm a lot confused.
401
00:35:37,151 --> 00:35:38,231
Theories?
402
00:35:39,198 --> 00:35:41,565
- This is all a dream?
- No.
403
00:35:44,157 --> 00:35:47,059
- I'm in a coma?
- No.
404
00:35:49,596 --> 00:35:51,898
Then I'm dead?
405
00:35:51,964 --> 00:35:55,575
This is hell or a purgatorium
or something?
406
00:35:55,644 --> 00:35:58,872
Okay, purgatorium
is where Romans vomited,
407
00:35:58,939 --> 00:36:03,891
but no, this is as real
as anything can be.
408
00:36:03,962 --> 00:36:05,587
What does that mean?
409
00:36:05,657 --> 00:36:08,024
Everything is what it is,
410
00:36:08,089 --> 00:36:10,772
but you're not
who you think you are.
411
00:36:12,793 --> 00:36:16,338
God, no, Gary, please don't.
412
00:36:16,408 --> 00:36:18,546
You can't trust her.
She's a nine.
413
00:36:18,616 --> 00:36:20,787
You don't know
what you're doing.
414
00:36:20,855 --> 00:36:24,083
Okay, so what happens
if I cross this line?
415
00:36:24,151 --> 00:36:26,736
I don't know,
but it's not good.
416
00:36:39,124 --> 00:36:40,172
Shit.
417
00:36:55,282 --> 00:36:57,169
Previously
on Behind the Screen...
418
00:36:58,193 --> 00:37:01,192
Gavin Taylor is one
of the best TV writers out there.
419
00:37:01,265 --> 00:37:03,720
Every network would kill
to work with him.
420
00:37:03,793 --> 00:37:05,615
- Good to see you!
- You look wonderful.
421
00:37:05,680 --> 00:37:08,298
My name's Gavin Taylor.
I'm a film and television writer.
422
00:37:08,368 --> 00:37:10,407
Knowing is a one-hour drama
423
00:37:10,479 --> 00:37:12,519
about a woman
whose husband disappears.
424
00:37:12,590 --> 00:37:15,208
She believes that her daughter
is the key to a dark conspiracy.
425
00:37:15,278 --> 00:37:18,027
Even way back into The Fugitive,
where they didn't have
426
00:37:18,094 --> 00:37:20,679
the full setup
and the payoff in each episode.
427
00:37:20,750 --> 00:37:23,237
Knowing is not
gonna be Crim9 Lab,
428
00:37:23,341 --> 00:37:26,657
not the popular kind of
mystery shows that are out there
429
00:37:26,700 --> 00:37:28,227
where we get all the answers.
430
00:37:28,300 --> 00:37:30,187
...trying to figure out how long
431
00:37:30,252 --> 00:37:32,324
is the attention span
of today's audience.
432
00:37:32,395 --> 00:37:33,442
So, boil it down for me.
433
00:37:33,515 --> 00:37:37,377
Give me one line that we
can really set Roger on fire with.
434
00:37:37,451 --> 00:37:40,963
Basically, it's like
Rosemary's Toddler.
435
00:37:44,169 --> 00:37:46,591
My favorite movie.
That's my favorite film.
436
00:37:49,416 --> 00:37:51,074
We sold it in the room.
437
00:37:51,785 --> 00:37:53,541
Just tell me Roger
liked the script.
438
00:37:53,608 --> 00:37:54,785
You're shooting a pilot.
439
00:37:54,856 --> 00:37:57,790
Melissa McCarthy is my first
and only choice for the lead.
440
00:37:57,863 --> 00:38:00,165
...writing a show
for you. For you.
441
00:38:01,255 --> 00:38:02,716
- Really?
- Yes.
442
00:38:02,791 --> 00:38:05,474
Gavin and I have been
friends forever.
443
00:38:05,542 --> 00:38:07,909
It's delightful to be working
on Knowing,
444
00:38:07,974 --> 00:38:09,828
and it's, you know,
not surprisingly,
445
00:38:09,893 --> 00:38:12,064
a fantastic script,
and it's a great cast.
446
00:38:12,133 --> 00:38:13,824
Gilmore Girls has been great,
447
00:38:13,893 --> 00:38:15,780
but, you know,
I'm excited to go
448
00:38:15,844 --> 00:38:18,593
and to have something
this great to go into.
449
00:38:18,660 --> 00:38:19,740
I totally trust Gavin.
450
00:38:20,708 --> 00:38:23,936
The only way we can afford
to shoot the pilot is in Canada.
451
00:38:24,003 --> 00:38:26,491
- I can't believe we're shooting it...
- A 15-day shoot versus...
452
00:38:26,563 --> 00:38:28,221
This is not an argument
I'm going to win.
453
00:38:28,291 --> 00:38:31,639
It's really hard to think about
leaving for six weeks.
454
00:38:33,954 --> 00:38:36,506
Puggies.
455
00:38:36,577 --> 00:38:37,657
Action.
456
00:39:00,445 --> 00:39:02,103
Puggies!
457
00:39:04,892 --> 00:39:06,004
Where's your brother?
458
00:39:06,076 --> 00:39:08,498
It's just so weird being back.
459
00:39:08,572 --> 00:39:11,190
It just doesn't feel like
my house anymore.
460
00:39:37,368 --> 00:39:38,350
At this stage,
461
00:39:38,423 --> 00:39:41,205
you have the script that you wrote
and the film that you shot,
462
00:39:41,270 --> 00:39:43,277
but you don't know how
it's gonna come together.
463
00:39:43,350 --> 00:39:45,172
You just know how
you want it to feel.
464
00:39:57,940 --> 00:40:00,874
Understand?
You have to use big girl hands.
465
00:40:00,948 --> 00:40:03,336
You want to see
where we were today?
466
00:40:03,411 --> 00:40:05,996
Okay, hit play. This button.
467
00:40:09,202 --> 00:40:12,496
There's you and there's Daddy.
468
00:40:12,562 --> 00:40:14,863
Oh, a little movie star.
469
00:40:18,833 --> 00:40:21,647
Oh, he'll be back soon.
Don't you worry.
470
00:40:24,719 --> 00:40:26,279
I don't know if we need
the cold open.
471
00:40:27,247 --> 00:40:30,181
I think we want to get
right to the story.
472
00:40:30,255 --> 00:40:33,418
- The story's so strong.
- Excuse me?
473
00:40:33,486 --> 00:40:35,242
Is there any way
we could be more clear
474
00:40:35,310 --> 00:40:37,284
about why Mary's
so freaked out at that moment?
475
00:40:37,357 --> 00:40:42,659
Wow... I think it's
pretty obvious and dramatic.
476
00:40:42,733 --> 00:40:44,805
It is, it's dramatic,
but, you know,
477
00:40:44,876 --> 00:40:46,632
that's Roger's
big thing this season,
478
00:40:46,700 --> 00:40:48,488
is never let the audience
be confused.
479
00:40:48,555 --> 00:40:52,100
Oh, my God, that's just
a huge thing to remove.
480
00:40:52,171 --> 00:40:54,724
No, it's just, you know,
let's see it without it.
481
00:40:54,795 --> 00:40:57,991
Humor. You know, life is full
of funny little strange moments.
482
00:40:58,058 --> 00:41:01,374
I'm just wondering if there
could be, like, not a belly laugh...
483
00:41:01,449 --> 00:41:04,264
I invited Susan to see a rough cut
because I trust her taste.
484
00:41:04,329 --> 00:41:08,419
More importantly, I trust her
as a barometer of Roger's taste.
485
00:41:08,488 --> 00:41:10,179
...to give the audience a little...
486
00:41:12,936 --> 00:41:14,626
Yeah, I mean...
487
00:41:14,695 --> 00:41:17,248
Unfortunately, in this process,
488
00:41:17,319 --> 00:41:20,733
it comes down to the decision of
one person, and that person's Roger.
489
00:41:20,806 --> 00:41:22,366
I was thinking
we could all go down
490
00:41:22,438 --> 00:41:23,845
to El Cholo for dinner tonight.
491
00:41:24,806 --> 00:41:27,588
How do you feel about
some blue corn enchiladas?
492
00:41:27,653 --> 00:41:29,627
Should we ask Daddy
when he gets back?
493
00:41:32,164 --> 00:41:34,019
He's not coming back.
494
00:41:35,364 --> 00:41:37,120
Okay, stop.
495
00:41:37,188 --> 00:41:40,504
We just need to slip a wild line
for you over the shot of Noelle.
496
00:41:40,579 --> 00:41:41,528
What's the line?
497
00:41:41,603 --> 00:41:43,675
"How could you."
498
00:41:43,747 --> 00:41:45,405
- How could you.
- How could you.
499
00:41:45,475 --> 00:41:47,776
It sounds like kosher
drug paraphernalia.
500
00:41:47,842 --> 00:41:50,744
"Hey, Schmuley!
Have a hook on the Hookajew."
501
00:41:50,817 --> 00:41:53,632
I know. It's just
for the test screening.
502
00:41:55,681 --> 00:41:57,623
They really think
people won't get it?
503
00:41:57,696 --> 00:41:59,518
The dumb people might not.
504
00:42:00,512 --> 00:42:03,097
I didn't think we were
making the show for dumb people.
505
00:42:03,167 --> 00:42:04,628
Yeah.
506
00:42:04,703 --> 00:42:05,913
He's not coming back.
507
00:42:07,999 --> 00:42:09,340
How could you?
508
00:42:09,406 --> 00:42:10,966
How could you?!
509
00:42:11,934 --> 00:42:13,046
How could you.
510
00:42:13,181 --> 00:42:14,588
How could you.
511
00:42:15,549 --> 00:42:16,563
How could you...?
512
00:42:16,637 --> 00:42:18,459
- One more.
- How could you?
513
00:42:18,524 --> 00:42:19,473
Cut. Perfect.
514
00:42:19,548 --> 00:42:22,068
- I feel so dirty.
- That's how I like it.
515
00:42:24,092 --> 00:42:25,269
I like that one.
516
00:42:28,539 --> 00:42:30,481
I want to thank you all
very much for coming.
517
00:42:30,555 --> 00:42:33,751
The show is Knowing.
It's a brand-new pilot.
518
00:42:33,819 --> 00:42:37,113
Here, in this audience today,
you are the very first people to see it,
519
00:42:37,178 --> 00:42:39,348
and after it's over,
I will come back here
520
00:42:39,418 --> 00:42:41,719
and we'll all fill out
a comment card on our thoughts.
521
00:42:41,785 --> 00:42:43,607
That being said,
enjoy the show.
522
00:42:57,526 --> 00:42:59,697
Please take as much time
as you like.
523
00:42:59,766 --> 00:43:01,359
There's no rush
with this whatsoever.
524
00:43:01,430 --> 00:43:05,139
When you are finished, we're gonna
break into two separate groups...
525
00:43:05,205 --> 00:43:07,660
men and women...
and then we'll discuss.
526
00:43:09,140 --> 00:43:11,922
One of the most important things
in any new show
527
00:43:11,988 --> 00:43:14,027
is how you feel
about the characters.
528
00:43:14,099 --> 00:43:15,441
If you like the characters,
529
00:43:15,507 --> 00:43:18,540
you're more likely
to tune in next week.
530
00:43:18,611 --> 00:43:20,433
Let's find out about
these characters.
531
00:43:20,499 --> 00:43:22,287
Show of hands...
how many of you liked
532
00:43:22,354 --> 00:43:24,078
the character of Gabriel?
533
00:43:24,146 --> 00:43:26,731
One, two, three, four, five, six.
534
00:43:26,802 --> 00:43:28,328
How 'bout Mary?
535
00:43:28,401 --> 00:43:30,986
One, two, three, four.
536
00:43:31,057 --> 00:43:32,072
Noelle?
537
00:43:33,489 --> 00:43:35,660
One, two, three, four,
five, six, seven.
538
00:43:35,728 --> 00:43:36,808
So, it's everybody.
539
00:43:36,880 --> 00:43:37,894
Sierra?
540
00:43:38,864 --> 00:43:41,285
One, two, three, four.
541
00:43:41,360 --> 00:43:43,083
That's it?
542
00:43:43,151 --> 00:43:45,605
Is there anything confusing
in the storyline
543
00:43:45,678 --> 00:43:47,750
that's not resolved for you?
544
00:43:47,822 --> 00:43:49,797
Look at this guy.
This guy hasn't budged.
545
00:43:49,870 --> 00:43:52,553
His eyes are shut.
That's helpful. Thank you.
546
00:43:52,622 --> 00:43:54,596
I hate it in movies
and TV shows when they
547
00:43:54,669 --> 00:43:57,124
leave the car windows down
when they totally wouldn't.
548
00:43:57,196 --> 00:43:59,716
- So they can see the camera?
- What's the difference.
549
00:43:59,788 --> 00:44:00,998
Want to see the camera?
550
00:44:01,068 --> 00:44:03,173
Was this an issue
for anybody else?
551
00:44:03,244 --> 00:44:05,032
One.
552
00:44:05,131 --> 00:44:06,505
Any other confusions?
553
00:44:06,539 --> 00:44:09,834
Yeah. Was the little girl deaf
or was she just mute?
554
00:44:11,530 --> 00:44:14,312
Is the little girl deaf or mute...
is she deaf or mute?
555
00:44:14,378 --> 00:44:16,003
I'm saying what would
you say to him?
556
00:44:16,074 --> 00:44:17,448
I'm not saying I don't know.
557
00:44:17,513 --> 00:44:21,190
Come on. We're not signing to her,
she's signing to us.
558
00:44:21,257 --> 00:44:23,777
We're just speaking to her,
and she seems to understand it.
559
00:44:23,849 --> 00:44:25,637
I thought that was quite clear.
560
00:44:25,704 --> 00:44:27,111
That guy's staring at me.
561
00:44:28,392 --> 00:44:30,050
He can't see you.
562
00:44:32,007 --> 00:44:33,795
God, he's staring at me.
563
00:44:33,862 --> 00:44:35,869
I just waved,
and he nodded his head.
564
00:44:38,182 --> 00:44:41,149
He can't see you.
Can't see us.
565
00:44:43,141 --> 00:44:44,767
Susan, he's looking right at me.
566
00:44:45,732 --> 00:44:48,601
You didn't raise your hand
to any questions. Any thoughts?
567
00:44:48,676 --> 00:44:50,531
- It's not real.
- What does that mean?
568
00:44:50,596 --> 00:44:53,279
The show's not real.
Why can't you see that? Jesus!
569
00:44:53,348 --> 00:44:55,170
What, are you fucking blind?!
570
00:44:55,235 --> 00:44:57,242
You think you're
above this, don't you?
571
00:44:57,315 --> 00:45:00,216
You are trapped here
with the rest of us, brother.
572
00:45:00,290 --> 00:45:02,297
Get out. Get out!
573
00:45:02,370 --> 00:45:04,224
Oblivio accebit!
574
00:45:12,480 --> 00:45:14,007
Oh, my God.
575
00:45:15,136 --> 00:45:16,313
You okay?
576
00:45:16,384 --> 00:45:17,944
Yeah, but what was that?
577
00:45:19,359 --> 00:45:20,504
Oh, my God.
578
00:45:21,663 --> 00:45:24,662
I don't know.
The guy was crazy, clearly, I just...
579
00:45:24,734 --> 00:45:28,628
I mean, the show's a little bit twisted,
so maybe it flipped something in him.
580
00:45:28,702 --> 00:45:30,163
What did he say?
581
00:45:30,237 --> 00:45:33,084
He said, "Oblivio accebit."
582
00:45:34,045 --> 00:45:37,143
It's Latin,
"oblivion approaches."
583
00:45:38,140 --> 00:45:39,416
What does that mean?
584
00:45:39,484 --> 00:45:41,720
Other than the world
is coming to an end?
585
00:45:42,683 --> 00:45:45,432
"Oblivio" can also mean forgetting.
586
00:45:45,499 --> 00:45:46,960
Forgetfulness.
587
00:45:50,554 --> 00:45:52,855
But I think that's
what I'm gonna do.
588
00:45:52,921 --> 00:45:54,001
Forget it.
589
00:45:54,074 --> 00:45:56,594
He was a terrible comedian
and his mom ran the Improv.
590
00:45:56,665 --> 00:45:57,744
Oh, my God, Pauly Shore.
591
00:45:57,817 --> 00:45:59,377
You're not helping me at all!
592
00:46:03,225 --> 00:46:05,842
Designer that was killed in Miami
outside of his house.
593
00:46:05,911 --> 00:46:06,991
Gianni Versace!
594
00:46:08,024 --> 00:46:09,398
One word for both of them.
595
00:46:09,463 --> 00:46:11,285
Brangelina.
596
00:46:13,175 --> 00:46:15,541
This is a hard one,
and I don't know how to do it.
597
00:46:17,238 --> 00:46:19,659
You're giving...
you and I should switch,
598
00:46:19,734 --> 00:46:21,970
because that's... you're...
599
00:46:25,620 --> 00:46:27,987
...three weeks later.
I remember that.
600
00:46:34,546 --> 00:46:36,783
Did you have a chance
to look at those cards yet?
601
00:46:36,851 --> 00:46:38,541
From the screening?
602
00:46:38,610 --> 00:46:40,333
Pardon me.
603
00:46:41,330 --> 00:46:43,784
- Daddy needs a drink.
- Help yourself then.
604
00:46:43,857 --> 00:46:45,548
Hey, woman! Where's my drink?
605
00:46:45,617 --> 00:46:49,511
I'm-a comin'!
But I still love you most.
606
00:46:49,585 --> 00:46:51,494
People will write things
on those cards
607
00:46:51,569 --> 00:46:53,324
that they won't say
in a focus group.
608
00:46:53,391 --> 00:46:54,918
They get more specific.
609
00:46:54,992 --> 00:46:57,577
Roger says, you know,
forget about the people
610
00:46:57,680 --> 00:46:59,534
who score you
in the twos and threes,
611
00:46:59,567 --> 00:47:01,508
because they're never
gonna like your show.
612
00:47:01,582 --> 00:47:05,259
- Instead, look for the nines.
- The nines.
613
00:47:05,326 --> 00:47:07,943
They're the ones
who think your show is almost
614
00:47:08,013 --> 00:47:09,639
the best thing
they've ever seen.
615
00:47:09,709 --> 00:47:12,556
They get your vision,
they just want it to be better.
616
00:47:12,621 --> 00:47:15,370
Round two is starting
without you!
617
00:47:15,436 --> 00:47:18,283
- You gonna look at those cards?
- Absolutely.
618
00:47:18,347 --> 00:47:19,296
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
619
00:47:38,824 --> 00:47:40,547
Sometimes the numbers
point things out
620
00:47:40,616 --> 00:47:43,780
that you didn't want to admit to yourself,
and in this case, it's Melissa.
621
00:47:44,744 --> 00:47:46,467
Well, her overall scores were okay,
622
00:47:46,535 --> 00:47:49,404
but if you look at the people
who scored the show the highest,
623
00:47:49,478 --> 00:47:52,325
the one consistent dip
was Melissa.
624
00:47:52,391 --> 00:47:56,613
There's some sort of subtle
undertones of negativity there.
625
00:47:56,678 --> 00:47:59,645
Well, Gavin, the show is testing
very well in the Midwest,
626
00:47:59,717 --> 00:48:03,775
but it's not doing well in the urban areas,
and it's not doing well with men.
627
00:48:03,844 --> 00:48:05,153
We've got a major problem,
628
00:48:05,220 --> 00:48:07,609
and I really need you
to think about this with me.
629
00:48:08,900 --> 00:48:11,517
It's Melissa, and it's just
what I thought it was gonna be.
630
00:48:11,587 --> 00:48:13,562
If you'd read the cards,
you'd understand.
631
00:48:13,635 --> 00:48:16,023
I read some of the cards,
but I don't believe in that stuff.
632
00:48:16,098 --> 00:48:19,676
I don't believe you can let
these armchair quarterbacks...
633
00:48:19,746 --> 00:48:22,942
They're not connecting to Melissa.
And I love her. She's so strong.
634
00:48:23,009 --> 00:48:24,764
I am with you on the fact
that she is not
635
00:48:24,833 --> 00:48:27,320
your traditional lead
of a network television show.
636
00:48:27,393 --> 00:48:29,280
She doesn't have
a ton to do in the pilot.
637
00:48:29,344 --> 00:48:30,588
There's so much to set it up.
638
00:48:30,656 --> 00:48:32,859
That's one of the challenges
of the premise pilot.
639
00:48:32,927 --> 00:48:36,407
- But the network still likes the show.
- Roger is your biggest cheerleader.
640
00:48:36,479 --> 00:48:37,821
Okay, how about above Roger?
641
00:48:37,887 --> 00:48:39,545
Roger's calling the shots on this.
642
00:48:39,615 --> 00:48:42,429
But we all know that Roger
consults with the "higher powers."
643
00:48:42,494 --> 00:48:44,283
- That is true.
- They tell him what to do.
644
00:48:44,350 --> 00:48:46,738
- I'm wondering if they liked the show.
- They haven't seen it.
645
00:48:46,813 --> 00:48:49,300
They're gonna watch
all of the pilots on Friday.
646
00:48:49,373 --> 00:48:50,682
That's what I'm telling you.
647
00:48:50,748 --> 00:48:53,814
I want to have something
to present to them...
648
00:48:53,916 --> 00:48:55,443
Why are you focusing
on Melissa?
649
00:48:56,828 --> 00:48:58,289
She's our biggest concern.
650
00:48:58,364 --> 00:49:00,186
She's also the biggest star
on the show.
651
00:49:00,251 --> 00:49:02,617
No, no, no.
You are the biggest star.
652
00:49:02,683 --> 00:49:04,209
Roger has a huge deal with you,
653
00:49:04,282 --> 00:49:07,630
and he went along with casting Melissa
when it was against his instinct.
654
00:49:07,706 --> 00:49:08,688
Hooray for Roger.
655
00:49:08,762 --> 00:49:11,445
I don't understand
what you want me to do.
656
00:49:11,513 --> 00:49:12,625
Meet with someone.
657
00:49:13,625 --> 00:49:16,374
- Who?
- Dahlia Salem.
658
00:49:17,336 --> 00:49:18,863
I know you like her.
659
00:49:18,936 --> 00:49:21,204
Oh, God.
Are you kidding me?
660
00:49:21,271 --> 00:49:23,410
The network has
a huge holding deal with her.
661
00:49:23,479 --> 00:49:25,999
Yes, and they put her
in Gatins' pilot.
662
00:49:26,071 --> 00:49:28,492
That's dead.
I mean, it's dying.
663
00:49:28,567 --> 00:49:30,738
But the network,
they love Dahlia,
664
00:49:30,806 --> 00:49:32,845
so if she could just
jump into your show...
665
00:49:32,918 --> 00:49:34,128
Just jump over to my show?
666
00:49:34,197 --> 00:49:37,361
There's no such thing...
there's re-shooting the pilot,
667
00:49:37,429 --> 00:49:39,883
and I brought this up
months and months ago.
668
00:49:39,956 --> 00:49:41,811
You guys kept pushing
other people on me,
669
00:49:41,876 --> 00:49:44,363
and I kept saying Melissa,
Melissa, Melissa.
670
00:49:44,436 --> 00:49:47,218
You kept pushing Melissa on us,
and now we have a problem.
671
00:49:47,283 --> 00:49:49,704
You're very lucky
in that Roger will pay for this.
672
00:49:49,779 --> 00:49:53,259
Roger is willing to re-shoot
this entire fucking thing.
673
00:49:55,122 --> 00:49:56,583
Is this really
about Melissa?
674
00:49:58,353 --> 00:50:02,062
This is about getting
your show on the air, right?
675
00:50:03,025 --> 00:50:06,025
I need you to focus on that.
In the end, that's all that matters.
676
00:50:08,144 --> 00:50:09,834
That's my job.
677
00:50:10,864 --> 00:50:11,920
- Hey, hi.
- Hi.
678
00:50:11,920 --> 00:50:12,389
- Hey, hi.
- Hi.
679
00:50:12,463 --> 00:50:15,146
- Well, nice to...
- Thank you for doing this.
680
00:50:15,214 --> 00:50:17,734
Absolutely. I've been looking
forward to this, actually.
681
00:50:17,806 --> 00:50:20,042
- I have a question for you.
- Yes?
682
00:50:20,110 --> 00:50:21,768
Is it "Dalia" or "Dahlia"?
683
00:50:21,837 --> 00:50:23,692
Thank you for asking.
It's "Dalia."
684
00:50:23,757 --> 00:50:25,066
- Dalia. I knew it!
- You did?
685
00:50:25,133 --> 00:50:26,955
I contested this
with someone earlier.
686
00:50:27,021 --> 00:50:28,003
Well, good.
687
00:50:28,077 --> 00:50:30,378
We have the same birthday.
I looked you up on IMDb.
688
00:50:30,444 --> 00:50:33,226
I wanted to see everything you...
yes, we have the same birthday!
689
00:50:33,292 --> 00:50:34,819
Same year, same day,
everything.
690
00:50:34,892 --> 00:50:36,680
- Are you kidding me?
- I'm not kidding you.
691
00:50:36,747 --> 00:50:38,536
- Isn't that cool?
- That's insane.
692
00:50:38,603 --> 00:50:40,806
- November 21 st.
- Oh, my God.
693
00:50:40,874 --> 00:50:43,689
So you're completely
and utterly crazy too!
694
00:50:43,754 --> 00:50:46,852
- She works more than me!
- That's the thing that's killing me,
695
00:50:46,922 --> 00:50:49,605
because she gave up
Gilmore Girls to do this show.
696
00:50:49,706 --> 00:50:51,112
She's a very strong character,
697
00:50:51,145 --> 00:50:53,184
and I'm attracted
to strong roles.
698
00:50:53,256 --> 00:50:55,841
Yeah, I'm hoping
to fill her out even more,
699
00:50:55,912 --> 00:51:00,003
and obviously collaborate
with the person that's playing her.
700
00:51:00,071 --> 00:51:02,820
I mean, I see why
the network loves her.
701
00:51:02,887 --> 00:51:05,123
She's adorable,
but it's just that in my head,
702
00:51:05,191 --> 00:51:07,165
you know, I wrote
the role for Melissa.
703
00:51:07,239 --> 00:51:10,621
She's one of my best friends,
and I can only imagine it with her.
704
00:51:10,694 --> 00:51:12,035
Could Dahlia do it?
705
00:51:12,998 --> 00:51:15,485
Absolutely. She's terrific.
706
00:51:15,557 --> 00:51:18,077
It could work, I just don't know
if I want it to work.
707
00:51:20,036 --> 00:51:22,108
When I get stressed out,
I play videogames.
708
00:51:22,180 --> 00:51:23,456
It's my therapy.
709
00:51:23,523 --> 00:51:26,141
Can't have them on my computer
at home 'cause I'd never write.
710
00:51:26,211 --> 00:51:28,632
I love these games
that you can kind of...
711
00:51:28,707 --> 00:51:30,333
Iose yourself a little bit in them.
712
00:51:30,403 --> 00:51:33,718
I love that it's a different world
that's existing at the same time.
713
00:51:33,794 --> 00:51:35,255
They're better than real life,
714
00:51:35,330 --> 00:51:38,232
because when you get stuck,
you can always hit "reset."
715
00:51:39,233 --> 00:51:42,102
That's what life needs.
Needs a reset button.
716
00:51:42,177 --> 00:51:44,151
I have to let Melissa go.
717
00:51:46,272 --> 00:51:48,661
What happens
if you don't let Melissa go?
718
00:51:48,735 --> 00:51:50,590
If I don't let Melissa go?
719
00:51:54,975 --> 00:51:56,731
My world ends, so...
720
00:51:57,694 --> 00:51:59,516
I can't let that happen.
721
00:51:59,581 --> 00:52:02,264
If we're gonna replace Melissa,
I want to hear it from Roger.
722
00:52:02,333 --> 00:52:03,642
Roger's on a plane to London,
723
00:52:03,709 --> 00:52:06,644
but I talked with him before he left,
and he said yes on Dahlia.
724
00:52:06,716 --> 00:52:08,243
What does that mean?
725
00:52:08,317 --> 00:52:10,204
It means yes.
726
00:52:10,268 --> 00:52:11,675
Yes, replace Melissa?
727
00:52:11,740 --> 00:52:15,668
Roger wants your show
on the air starring Dahlia,
728
00:52:15,740 --> 00:52:19,285
and I just got off the phone
with her agents, and they love it,
729
00:52:19,355 --> 00:52:20,783
and she loves, loves you.
730
00:52:20,858 --> 00:52:21,806
What about Melissa?
731
00:52:21,882 --> 00:52:24,467
- You want me to call her agents?
- Oh, God, no.
732
00:52:24,537 --> 00:52:25,944
No, I'll tell her.
733
00:52:37,400 --> 00:52:44,338
As long as he needs me
734
00:52:44,439 --> 00:52:47,537
I know where I must be
735
00:52:47,574 --> 00:52:51,795
I am trying to get
my one-woman show together
736
00:52:51,862 --> 00:52:54,861
that I'm trying to squeeze
in between the pilot and the series.
737
00:52:54,933 --> 00:52:56,623
When you add that cry to the voice:
738
00:52:56,692 --> 00:52:58,797
As long as...
739
00:53:02,068 --> 00:53:05,101
I've always been kind of
obsessed with nuns.
740
00:53:05,171 --> 00:53:08,204
You know, they're kind of
like God's fag-hags, so...
741
00:53:08,275 --> 00:53:10,576
I went to private
Catholic schools for 12 years,
742
00:53:10,642 --> 00:53:13,359
so I have a lot of... nuns.
743
00:53:14,865 --> 00:53:17,767
I'm sorry.
I swear, I don't usually...
744
00:53:17,841 --> 00:53:19,018
I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
745
00:53:20,177 --> 00:53:21,900
I have to take this. I'm so sorry.
746
00:53:21,969 --> 00:53:24,870
Yeah, I guess we still mean it.
747
00:53:24,944 --> 00:53:26,253
They accepted our offer.
748
00:53:27,216 --> 00:53:28,874
All right, we will call you back.
749
00:53:28,944 --> 00:53:30,667
Thank you. No, no, no, it's good.
750
00:53:30,735 --> 00:53:32,491
I know I sound nervous.
Okay, bye.
751
00:53:34,126 --> 00:53:35,784
I think we just bought a house.
752
00:53:35,854 --> 00:53:37,512
Pretty good.
Pretty good, right?
753
00:53:37,582 --> 00:53:38,531
That's good.
754
00:53:38,605 --> 00:53:40,099
- Right?
- Yeah, I'm sorry.
755
00:53:40,173 --> 00:53:42,823
Go to take a phone call...
we just bought a house!
756
00:53:42,892 --> 00:53:45,991
Well, I think that the show
that Gavin wrote for her
757
00:53:46,061 --> 00:53:47,621
could be a really big deal for her,
758
00:53:47,692 --> 00:53:50,309
'cause she's been more
of a supporting character,
759
00:53:50,379 --> 00:53:52,899
and now she's right in the thick.
760
00:53:52,971 --> 00:53:56,266
So, it's exciting.
She's really excited, a little nervous.
761
00:53:56,330 --> 00:53:59,232
Then you will know
762
00:53:59,307 --> 00:54:02,372
If someone needs you
763
00:54:02,441 --> 00:54:05,539
You love them so
764
00:54:06,857 --> 00:54:09,377
I won't...
765
00:54:11,273 --> 00:54:15,647
Betray his trust
766
00:54:15,720 --> 00:54:20,258
Though people say I must
767
00:54:21,255 --> 00:54:25,564
I've got to stay true to...
768
00:54:27,334 --> 00:54:33,923
As long as he needs me
769
00:54:46,435 --> 00:54:48,540
Then he's like,
"I'm straight, remember?"
770
00:54:48,611 --> 00:54:50,715
Suddenly stricken
with some sort of gay panic.
771
00:54:50,785 --> 00:54:52,279
"I'm your straight husband."
772
00:54:52,353 --> 00:54:55,352
- You can throw color swatches at me.
- I know. Oh, I will.
773
00:54:55,425 --> 00:54:57,564
I think my house is haunted.
774
00:54:58,528 --> 00:55:00,535
Well, your house is really old.
775
00:55:00,608 --> 00:55:03,291
Ever since I got back,
I just, I feel like there's...
776
00:55:03,360 --> 00:55:05,148
I feel like there's
someone else there,
777
00:55:05,216 --> 00:55:08,314
and then last night,
I thought I heard something,
778
00:55:08,383 --> 00:55:09,943
like, a woman singing.
779
00:55:11,166 --> 00:55:14,548
- What? Like a ghost?
- I guess. I don't know.
780
00:55:14,622 --> 00:55:17,786
Then I saw something.
I actually ran into someone.
781
00:55:17,854 --> 00:55:19,861
I mean, I saw...
782
00:55:21,629 --> 00:55:23,417
Was it the singing ghost?
783
00:55:24,380 --> 00:55:27,379
It was a man.
I think it was me.
784
00:55:28,539 --> 00:55:31,059
What? Your house
is haunted by yourself?
785
00:55:36,730 --> 00:55:39,283
Yeah, I don't, I mean, I'm like...
786
00:55:39,354 --> 00:55:41,208
having a nervous breakdown
or something.
787
00:55:41,273 --> 00:55:42,931
I'm literally so focused
on this show
788
00:55:43,001 --> 00:55:45,205
that I feel like I'm living
inside of the show.
789
00:55:45,273 --> 00:55:47,247
I can't tell where
it ends and I begin,
790
00:55:47,320 --> 00:55:49,360
and I'm having
conversations with people,
791
00:55:49,433 --> 00:55:51,920
and I'm ten feet outside
of my body and looking down.
792
00:55:51,992 --> 00:55:54,413
There I am, having
this conversation with somebody,
793
00:55:54,488 --> 00:55:56,854
and I'm just observing it,
you know.
794
00:55:57,847 --> 00:55:59,985
Just, I don't feel good.
795
00:56:01,718 --> 00:56:04,467
You're just stressed, right?
796
00:56:06,198 --> 00:56:08,564
The network wants
to replace you.
797
00:56:08,629 --> 00:56:10,036
Oh, my God.
798
00:56:14,484 --> 00:56:16,273
And I'm letting them,
799
00:56:16,340 --> 00:56:20,016
because I really want
this show on the air.
800
00:56:20,979 --> 00:56:22,921
I have all these characters
inside my head,
801
00:56:22,995 --> 00:56:25,231
and they wanna live,
and I'm the only way...
802
00:56:25,299 --> 00:56:27,916
This is the only way
that they can.
803
00:56:28,882 --> 00:56:31,729
- I have five seasons mapped out.
- Oh, five?
804
00:56:32,689 --> 00:56:34,696
Well, it sucks.
805
00:56:34,801 --> 00:56:36,656
Either you go away
or the show goes,
806
00:56:36,688 --> 00:56:38,663
and I had to make a decision,
807
00:56:38,737 --> 00:56:40,646
and that's the decision
that I made.
808
00:56:41,392 --> 00:56:44,425
And I am so sorry.
809
00:56:46,351 --> 00:56:48,074
I understand.
810
00:56:48,142 --> 00:56:51,916
I mean, it's not your fault, right?
811
00:56:51,982 --> 00:56:54,469
I mean, it couldn't be your fault.
812
00:56:54,542 --> 00:56:58,436
You are morally incapable
of doing the right thing.
813
00:56:58,509 --> 00:57:00,232
Right? Don't do that.
814
00:57:01,261 --> 00:57:02,275
Don't get me wrong.
815
00:57:02,348 --> 00:57:03,973
I think you do feel bad for me.
816
00:57:04,044 --> 00:57:06,378
That's all I think you feel for me.
817
00:57:06,443 --> 00:57:08,069
Okay, I am still the fat girl
818
00:57:08,140 --> 00:57:10,954
you call on Friday nights
when your date falls through.
819
00:57:11,019 --> 00:57:12,677
"Hey, let's go see a movie!"
820
00:57:12,746 --> 00:57:14,885
"Let's go to Fubar."
821
00:57:14,955 --> 00:57:17,442
"Then when I pick up
a hot piece of ass, I'll drop you,
822
00:57:17,514 --> 00:57:19,488
"and that's okay...
don't worry about Melissa.
823
00:57:19,561 --> 00:57:22,048
I mean, you can call her tomorrow
and apologize, or not."
824
00:57:22,121 --> 00:57:25,382
It doesn't really matter 'cause we're not
actually friends, are we, Gavin?
825
00:57:25,449 --> 00:57:28,034
- That's just not true.
- Isn't it, really?
826
00:57:28,104 --> 00:57:30,470
I prefer to not do this
on camera, okay?
827
00:57:30,535 --> 00:57:32,510
- Is this not a good idea?
- Please lower your voice.
828
00:57:32,584 --> 00:57:34,623
I'm not gonna lower my voice.
Is that embarrassing?
829
00:57:34,695 --> 00:57:36,069
You can't control this one.
830
00:57:36,134 --> 00:57:38,076
Your little puppets
are off their strings,
831
00:57:38,151 --> 00:57:40,638
running around saying shit
that you didn't write.
832
00:57:40,710 --> 00:57:43,295
Well, this is reality,
and it scares the shit out of you.
833
00:57:43,365 --> 00:57:45,121
Reality scares me?
Does it really?
834
00:57:45,189 --> 00:57:48,036
I'm gonna tell you, you wouldn't
be here if it wasn't for me.
835
00:57:48,101 --> 00:57:50,654
I gave you your first few roles
and your career as a result.
836
00:57:50,725 --> 00:57:52,034
That's reality, Melissa.
837
00:57:52,100 --> 00:57:55,448
Thank you for finally
playing that fucking card,
838
00:57:55,524 --> 00:57:57,531
the "I invented
Melissa McCarthy" card.
839
00:57:57,603 --> 00:57:59,545
I bought a house, Gavin!
840
00:57:59,619 --> 00:58:02,041
I bought a house
'cause of what we talked about.
841
00:58:03,010 --> 00:58:05,628
Fuck you, and don't ever
fucking pity me again.
842
00:58:19,136 --> 00:58:20,215
Cut, please.
843
00:58:22,239 --> 00:58:23,254
Please.
844
00:58:31,709 --> 00:58:33,716
Upfronts is the week each year
845
00:58:33,789 --> 00:58:37,018
when the networks present
their fall schedule to the advertisers.
846
00:58:37,085 --> 00:58:38,972
It's a very important event for us,
847
00:58:39,036 --> 00:58:41,338
and the weeks preceding it
are pretty stressful
848
00:58:41,404 --> 00:58:44,370
because the schedule is a secret
right up until it's announced.
849
00:58:44,443 --> 00:58:46,548
"Upfronts"
is a complete oxymoron
850
00:58:46,619 --> 00:58:50,230
because nobody's
remotely honest, so it's...
851
00:58:50,298 --> 00:58:52,469
It's really a show
for the advertisers
852
00:58:52,538 --> 00:58:56,182
to get them really jazzed up
about the new product for the fall.
853
00:58:56,250 --> 00:58:58,192
"Here's our new shit. Like it?"
854
00:58:58,266 --> 00:59:00,502
There's lots of upsides...
you're in New York.
855
00:59:00,569 --> 00:59:03,121
Any time you're in New York City
is a good time.
856
00:59:05,368 --> 00:59:07,408
So, have you heard from Susan?
857
00:59:07,480 --> 00:59:10,578
No, I've not heard
from Susan as of yet.
858
00:59:10,648 --> 00:59:13,844
I left her four or five messages
859
00:59:13,911 --> 00:59:16,277
telling her what
went down with Melissa,
860
00:59:16,343 --> 00:59:18,709
and that I let her go,
and that I met with Dahlia...
861
00:59:19,830 --> 00:59:21,652
and I've not yet
heard back from her.
862
00:59:22,805 --> 00:59:24,594
I feel bad about
what happened with Melissa,
863
00:59:24,661 --> 00:59:26,962
but it's a two-way street
and I'm a little angry, too.
864
00:59:27,061 --> 00:59:29,068
We've been friends for years.
865
00:59:29,108 --> 00:59:31,529
I think we'll be friends again.
866
00:59:33,076 --> 00:59:34,669
We'll move on.
867
00:59:34,740 --> 00:59:37,521
Ice cold water, ice cold water.
868
00:59:37,587 --> 00:59:39,528
Only one dollar.
869
00:59:39,602 --> 00:59:43,180
I was 12 when we got in this car.
870
00:59:44,882 --> 00:59:47,337
I've not yet heard from Susan.
871
00:59:47,409 --> 00:59:49,711
Got off the plane,
checked messages, nothing.
872
00:59:52,561 --> 00:59:54,218
I suppose that we have a...
873
00:59:55,536 --> 00:59:57,739
I suppose we have
a reciprocal relationship,
874
00:59:57,808 --> 00:59:59,302
my show and your show.
875
00:59:59,375 --> 01:00:02,026
That's the thing
about reality television, isn't it...
876
01:00:02,095 --> 01:00:04,363
the worse it gets for me,
the better it is for you.
877
01:00:07,182 --> 01:00:09,450
It certainly inspires
a newfound sympathy
878
01:00:09,517 --> 01:00:10,695
for my characters.
879
01:00:10,766 --> 01:00:12,391
You know,
I put them through hell.
880
01:00:13,901 --> 01:00:17,064
I kill off their husbands
or throw them off cliffs.
881
01:00:17,132 --> 01:00:18,692
I'm a cruel god...
882
01:00:20,204 --> 01:00:23,400
all in the name of a good story
or compelling television.
883
01:00:25,611 --> 01:00:27,716
What's funny is that I'm
a character in your show.
884
01:00:27,787 --> 01:00:29,347
I'm disposable.
885
01:00:29,418 --> 01:00:32,931
Kill off the hero.
No one will see it coming.
886
01:00:34,313 --> 01:00:35,458
I dare you.
887
01:00:40,328 --> 01:00:42,335
I think I'm just tired, you know?
888
01:00:42,408 --> 01:00:43,520
I'm just tired.
889
01:00:49,799 --> 01:00:51,590
It's just so surreal being here.
890
01:00:51,590 --> 01:00:54,340
It's not at all how I imagined.
891
01:00:59,302 --> 01:01:00,578
Hey, you!
892
01:01:00,645 --> 01:01:02,717
Hey, hi!
893
01:01:02,789 --> 01:01:04,415
God, Gavin.
894
01:01:04,485 --> 01:01:05,662
Get in here, get in here!
895
01:01:05,732 --> 01:01:07,161
You're doing your show.
896
01:01:07,237 --> 01:01:09,724
And so are you.
Welcome to reality television.
897
01:01:09,796 --> 01:01:10,876
Did you just get in?
898
01:01:10,947 --> 01:01:12,027
Just now.
899
01:01:12,099 --> 01:01:16,255
This whole last 24 hours
have been surreal.
900
01:01:16,323 --> 01:01:18,265
Right. I just said that. Surreal.
901
01:01:19,522 --> 01:01:21,496
- You're good?
- Yeah, great.
902
01:01:21,602 --> 01:01:22,845
I wanted to call you, and...
903
01:01:22,882 --> 01:01:26,110
Oh, yeah? Call anytime.
Seriously, I don't sleep, so...
904
01:01:26,177 --> 01:01:30,170
I just felt really weird
about what happened.
905
01:01:30,240 --> 01:01:32,062
It's just too bad.
906
01:01:32,128 --> 01:01:33,338
What happened?
907
01:01:33,408 --> 01:01:36,441
So I just bumped
into Dahlia Salem,
908
01:01:36,511 --> 01:01:37,689
star of my show.
909
01:01:40,415 --> 01:01:44,211
She tells me that
Gatins' show got picked up,
910
01:01:44,286 --> 01:01:46,173
so, no, she won't
be starring in my show,
911
01:01:46,238 --> 01:01:48,343
which makes me wonder
if my show even exists.
912
01:01:52,573 --> 01:01:55,507
No, no, I left word for Roger,
and I left word for Susan too.
913
01:01:55,581 --> 01:01:57,719
It's like they dropped off
the face of the Earth.
914
01:01:59,260 --> 01:02:01,147
Just call me
when you know something.
915
01:02:09,722 --> 01:02:11,249
At this moment,
I can't be certain
916
01:02:11,322 --> 01:02:13,710
whether Knowing will end up
on the schedule at all.
917
01:02:13,785 --> 01:02:16,240
As far as Gavin's concerned,
the show is on the air.
918
01:02:16,313 --> 01:02:19,509
You don't normally fly to New York
and find out at the last fucking second
919
01:02:19,608 --> 01:02:21,266
that your show's
been pulled off the air.
920
01:02:21,305 --> 01:02:24,086
- Excuse me.
- So what is the situation right now?
921
01:02:24,152 --> 01:02:27,631
I don't know. Right now,
the entire schedule is in flux,
922
01:02:27,703 --> 01:02:30,703
and I get these missives
from Roger and the "higher powers,"
923
01:02:30,775 --> 01:02:32,978
but you're not really sure
what they add up to.
924
01:02:33,558 --> 01:02:34,507
What's up?
925
01:02:34,582 --> 01:02:36,884
They flew you out here anyway, huh?
926
01:02:36,950 --> 01:02:40,081
- Oh, see you... you know!
- No, I mean...
927
01:02:40,149 --> 01:02:42,963
It would've been great if you'd extended
the common courtesy of a call.
928
01:02:43,028 --> 01:02:45,100
Gavin, this is
the television business.
929
01:02:45,172 --> 01:02:47,921
It's like high school.
I don't know what to tell you, man.
930
01:02:47,987 --> 01:02:50,802
- I'm sorry.
- Sorry?
931
01:02:50,867 --> 01:02:52,907
But I'm kind of not.
I want my show on the air,
932
01:02:52,979 --> 01:02:55,118
just like you want
your show on the air.
933
01:02:55,187 --> 01:02:58,186
It was shitty of you to go
behind my back after Dahlia, okay?
934
01:02:58,258 --> 01:02:59,567
That was shitty.
935
01:03:02,162 --> 01:03:04,747
And you fired
Melissa McCarthy without...
936
01:03:04,817 --> 01:03:06,442
you didn't even have a backup.
937
01:03:06,513 --> 01:03:08,553
Why would they pick up
your show without a star?
938
01:03:08,625 --> 01:03:11,242
- The network wanted Dahlia.
- They wanted Dahlia in my show.
939
01:03:11,312 --> 01:03:14,029
We tested before your show.
We tested through the roof.
940
01:03:14,096 --> 01:03:16,583
You should see the numbers.
I'll show them to you.
941
01:03:18,095 --> 01:03:21,607
- Really?
- Yeah. Who's your exec?
942
01:03:21,678 --> 01:03:23,139
Susan Howard.
943
01:03:23,214 --> 01:03:25,418
Susan Howard.
She was there.
944
01:03:25,486 --> 01:03:26,630
Ask her.
945
01:03:26,701 --> 01:03:28,163
She would know.
946
01:03:37,772 --> 01:03:39,462
I'm at the UTA party.
947
01:03:39,531 --> 01:03:41,320
Did you hear
about Ricky's assistant?
948
01:03:41,387 --> 01:03:42,761
She literally shat herself.
949
01:03:42,827 --> 01:03:44,452
- No, I saw it!
- Hey!
950
01:03:45,099 --> 01:03:46,887
I'll break your fucking finger!
951
01:03:48,010 --> 01:03:49,220
I'll call you back.
952
01:03:54,313 --> 01:03:56,800
All right, let me explain
why I didn't call you back.
953
01:03:56,873 --> 01:03:58,782
Roger wanted to talk
to you personally.
954
01:03:58,856 --> 01:04:02,336
- Bullshit. Bullshit.
- We're only picking up two dramas.
955
01:04:02,407 --> 01:04:05,723
- The rest is what, reality?
- You can go mid-season.
956
01:04:05,799 --> 01:04:08,319
You can go to hell, okay?
957
01:04:08,935 --> 01:04:10,178
All right.
958
01:04:10,246 --> 01:04:12,799
I've been the only one here
trying to protect you...
959
01:04:12,870 --> 01:04:15,139
Oh, God, don't start!
Protecting me from what?
960
01:04:15,237 --> 01:04:17,790
From you? You're psychotic.
All I wanna know is why.
961
01:04:17,829 --> 01:04:19,073
- You want a motive?
- I do.
962
01:04:19,141 --> 01:04:20,293
This isn't Crim9 Lab.
Nobody got murdered.
963
01:04:20,293 --> 01:04:21,307
This isn't Crim9 Lab.
Nobody got murdered.
964
01:04:21,381 --> 01:04:25,242
My show did. Tell me why.
965
01:04:25,284 --> 01:04:27,966
I had to get you away from her.
She was holding you back.
966
01:04:28,004 --> 01:04:29,433
- You had to give her up.
- Melissa.
967
01:04:29,475 --> 01:04:31,133
If she really mattered so much,
968
01:04:31,171 --> 01:04:33,407
you couldn't have
betrayed her so easily.
969
01:04:33,443 --> 01:04:36,377
Do you manipulate everybody
or am I special?
970
01:04:36,418 --> 01:04:37,596
Are you the victim here?
971
01:04:37,634 --> 01:04:40,252
The big creator can't stand up
to one little d-girl?
972
01:04:40,289 --> 01:04:42,842
- It was your choice.
- Give me a break.
973
01:04:42,881 --> 01:04:46,012
I didn't have a choice.
It was either Dahlia or no show.
974
01:04:46,048 --> 01:04:47,990
That was the only thing...
oh, fuck you!
975
01:04:48,032 --> 01:04:49,374
Fuck you!
976
01:04:49,408 --> 01:04:51,709
Your dialogue
used to be a lot sharper.
977
01:04:51,744 --> 01:04:53,500
Maybe Gatins
could give it a polish.
978
01:05:02,205 --> 01:05:03,765
Is that all there is?
979
01:05:05,757 --> 01:05:08,026
You feel like a man?
980
01:05:08,093 --> 01:05:10,481
Because I'll tell you
a little secret.
981
01:05:10,556 --> 01:05:12,312
You're not.
982
01:05:53,557 --> 01:05:55,979
Hey, look, my...
I don't wanna do this anymore.
983
01:05:56,053 --> 01:05:57,362
My show is not gonna happen,
984
01:05:57,428 --> 01:06:00,330
so this show's over, done, gone,
good-bye, thank you very much.
985
01:06:00,404 --> 01:06:02,509
I'm not gonna be
your fuckin' puppet!
986
01:06:03,795 --> 01:06:05,934
- Are you all right?
- I'm fine.
987
01:06:06,004 --> 01:06:07,465
Who you talkin' to?
988
01:06:29,519 --> 01:06:31,145
Oh, God.
989
01:06:53,676 --> 01:06:56,293
I can understand
why you're a little confused.
990
01:06:56,363 --> 01:06:57,541
No, no.
991
01:06:58,635 --> 01:07:00,675
I'm a lot confused.
992
01:07:03,370 --> 01:07:04,580
Theories?
993
01:07:05,673 --> 01:07:07,648
This is all a dream?
994
01:07:07,721 --> 01:07:08,670
No.
995
01:07:10,505 --> 01:07:12,392
I'm in a coma?
996
01:07:12,456 --> 01:07:13,285
No.
997
01:07:16,424 --> 01:07:17,951
Then I'm dead?
998
01:07:18,024 --> 01:07:19,518
This is hell
999
01:07:19,591 --> 01:07:22,591
or a purgatorium or something?
1000
01:07:22,663 --> 01:07:23,939
Okay, purgatorium
1001
01:07:24,007 --> 01:07:25,665
is where Romans vomited,
1002
01:07:25,734 --> 01:07:28,963
but no, this is as real
1003
01:07:29,030 --> 01:07:30,077
as anything can be.
1004
01:07:30,150 --> 01:07:31,905
What does that mean?
1005
01:07:31,973 --> 01:07:34,013
Everything is what it is,
1006
01:07:34,085 --> 01:07:37,401
but you're not who you think you are.
1007
01:07:39,556 --> 01:07:42,174
Okay. Then who am I?
1008
01:07:44,004 --> 01:07:45,345
You are...
1009
01:07:47,267 --> 01:07:49,754
a multi-dimensional being
1010
01:07:49,826 --> 01:07:53,208
of vast, almost infinite power.
1011
01:07:53,282 --> 01:07:56,510
You, this body you're in,
1012
01:07:56,577 --> 01:07:59,544
it's just one of your incarnations,
1013
01:07:59,617 --> 01:08:01,886
avatars, call you what you will.
1014
01:08:02,880 --> 01:08:05,182
Are you saying I'm God?
1015
01:08:05,280 --> 01:08:07,255
Technically, no.
1016
01:08:07,296 --> 01:08:09,565
If God is a ten,
1017
01:08:09,631 --> 01:08:11,834
a theoretical ultimate,
1018
01:08:11,902 --> 01:08:14,324
you're more of a nine.
1019
01:08:16,254 --> 01:08:17,202
What are you?
1020
01:08:18,206 --> 01:08:19,613
Humans are sevens.
1021
01:08:19,678 --> 01:08:21,052
Monkeys are sixes.
1022
01:08:22,461 --> 01:08:24,053
What are the eights?
1023
01:08:24,125 --> 01:08:25,434
Koalas.
1024
01:08:25,500 --> 01:08:26,710
They're telepathic,
1025
01:08:26,780 --> 01:08:28,508
plus they control the weather.
1026
01:08:28,508 --> 01:08:30,712
But the important thing is you.
1027
01:08:33,019 --> 01:08:34,807
You created this world on a whim
1028
01:08:34,843 --> 01:08:37,144
and decided to stick around
1029
01:08:37,179 --> 01:08:39,993
to see how it turned out.
1030
01:08:40,026 --> 01:08:41,335
You can destroy the world
1031
01:08:41,370 --> 01:08:42,744
with a single thought.
1032
01:08:42,777 --> 01:08:45,559
Don't, incidentally.
1033
01:08:45,594 --> 01:08:48,048
Just file that away.
1034
01:08:48,089 --> 01:08:51,088
But... the truth is,
1035
01:08:51,128 --> 01:08:53,168
you hold all the cards.
1036
01:08:54,328 --> 01:08:55,538
When people pray,
1037
01:08:55,607 --> 01:08:57,746
they don't want this thing
1038
01:08:57,816 --> 01:08:59,441
or that thing.
1039
01:08:59,511 --> 01:09:01,453
They don't want to be forgotten.
1040
01:09:04,918 --> 01:09:08,660
So... you understand?
1041
01:09:08,726 --> 01:09:11,540
I mean, I would've told you earlier,
1042
01:09:11,605 --> 01:09:12,554
but I didn't...
1043
01:09:12,629 --> 01:09:13,773
Yeah.
1044
01:09:13,844 --> 01:09:15,600
Okay?
1045
01:09:15,668 --> 01:09:17,097
I understand.
1046
01:09:20,307 --> 01:09:22,478
But I don't believe you.
1047
01:09:47,183 --> 01:09:49,932
Noelle, don't get too far ahead.
1048
01:09:53,070 --> 01:09:55,688
No! You had ice cream at lunch.
1049
01:09:57,326 --> 01:09:59,781
Evidently, frozen yogurt
doesn't count.
1050
01:09:59,885 --> 01:10:01,292
I'll make note.
1051
01:10:01,324 --> 01:10:05,033
That's blazing speed
right there!
1052
01:10:08,364 --> 01:10:09,825
Did you hit it?
1053
01:10:09,900 --> 01:10:11,460
Shouldn't have to.
1054
01:10:20,425 --> 01:10:22,759
Honey, I think we left
the overhead light on.
1055
01:10:24,265 --> 01:10:27,166
Battery's dead.
At least the starter is.
1056
01:10:27,240 --> 01:10:29,957
- How do we, uh?
- We call the service.
1057
01:10:30,024 --> 01:10:31,365
There's not much else we can do.
1058
01:10:31,432 --> 01:10:34,246
Just the little battery, right?
The big one's probably fine.
1059
01:10:34,311 --> 01:10:35,805
I guess.
1060
01:10:35,879 --> 01:10:38,148
We can't jump it
from one battery to another?
1061
01:10:38,215 --> 01:10:39,741
You cross over somehow?
1062
01:10:39,815 --> 01:10:41,789
Who do you think
you married, MacGyver?
1063
01:10:41,862 --> 01:10:44,415
Come on. Hold on.
1064
01:10:49,509 --> 01:10:51,036
- Are you getting a signal?
- No.
1065
01:10:51,109 --> 01:10:52,091
You?
1066
01:10:53,093 --> 01:10:54,619
Yes. One bar.
1067
01:11:02,019 --> 01:11:04,572
Don't worry.
Daddy's calling people to help us.
1068
01:11:04,642 --> 01:11:06,781
Minute you place a call,
the bar goes away.
1069
01:11:06,850 --> 01:11:08,159
Keep trying.
1070
01:11:08,226 --> 01:11:11,324
I'll keep trying, Mary,
but it's gonna keep happening.
1071
01:11:11,393 --> 01:11:13,051
What do you wanna do?
1072
01:11:14,433 --> 01:11:15,415
I don't know.
1073
01:11:17,441 --> 01:11:19,229
Maybe if you hold it up higher.
1074
01:11:26,399 --> 01:11:29,049
Okay, look, the problem is
that we're boxed in.
1075
01:11:29,119 --> 01:11:30,428
It's a canyon.
1076
01:11:30,494 --> 01:11:33,014
Where we came off the main road,
it was more open and higher, too.
1077
01:11:34,845 --> 01:11:37,845
- That's at least a mile.
- I can run that.
1078
01:11:39,069 --> 01:11:40,378
So, what, we stay here?
1079
01:11:43,420 --> 01:11:44,761
You okay with that?
1080
01:11:44,828 --> 01:11:47,643
I don't think we have
much of a choice, so...
1081
01:11:47,708 --> 01:11:50,457
- Yeah. Go.
- Okay.
1082
01:11:51,931 --> 01:11:54,036
Daddy's gonna get
a truck to help us out.
1083
01:11:54,138 --> 01:11:56,527
Take care of Mommy, okay?
All right.
1084
01:11:56,570 --> 01:11:57,814
Be right back.
1085
01:13:02,031 --> 01:13:04,845
Excuse me.
1086
01:13:04,911 --> 01:13:07,757
Hi. Do you have a cell phone?
1087
01:13:08,718 --> 01:13:10,987
Oh, no, I don't.
There's no service up here.
1088
01:13:11,054 --> 01:13:12,909
Yeah, I'm finding that out.
1089
01:13:12,974 --> 01:13:16,934
You can usually get a signal
down at the ranger's station.
1090
01:13:17,005 --> 01:13:20,136
Yeah, you just follow
the road down.
1091
01:13:20,205 --> 01:13:22,092
It's probably... I don't know.
You got a car?
1092
01:13:22,156 --> 01:13:25,385
No, it's dead.
That's why I need a...
1093
01:13:26,347 --> 01:13:28,070
Are you headed
back to your car now?
1094
01:13:28,139 --> 01:13:31,401
If you could give me a ride
to a gas station, wherever?
1095
01:13:34,730 --> 01:13:37,577
Look, I'm not
some crazy Ted Bundy guy.
1096
01:13:37,641 --> 01:13:39,713
I'm not gonna rape
or kill you or anything.
1097
01:13:40,777 --> 01:13:43,940
Which is, of course,
what a Ted Bundy would say.
1098
01:13:45,384 --> 01:13:48,002
Look, I'm a videogame designer.
1099
01:13:48,072 --> 01:13:51,071
My wife is an editor,
my daughter's eight.
1100
01:13:51,176 --> 01:13:53,444
Look, I just... they're waiting
back at the car.
1101
01:13:53,479 --> 01:13:55,006
Just a little help before it gets dark.
1102
01:13:55,078 --> 01:13:56,965
I'll call somebody
when I get back to town.
1103
01:13:57,031 --> 01:13:59,485
I believe you, I do, it's just
you don't know where the car is,
1104
01:13:59,558 --> 01:14:00,638
and the guy might not come.
1105
01:14:00,710 --> 01:14:03,360
- We can't be up here all night, so...
- Sorry.
1106
01:14:03,429 --> 01:14:06,331
- Don't be sorry, just help me out.
- No.
1107
01:14:06,405 --> 01:14:07,517
I can't.
1108
01:14:12,451 --> 01:14:14,175
Why won't you trust me?
1109
01:14:38,912 --> 01:14:41,148
Okay, but you have to be careful.
1110
01:14:41,215 --> 01:14:43,549
Understand? You have
to use big girl hands.
1111
01:14:44,542 --> 01:14:46,549
You want to see
where we were today?
1112
01:14:46,654 --> 01:14:49,436
Okay, hit play. This button.
1113
01:14:52,477 --> 01:14:55,379
There's you and there's Daddy.
1114
01:14:55,453 --> 01:14:57,460
A little movie star.
1115
01:15:02,492 --> 01:15:04,858
He'll be back soon.
Don't you worry.
1116
01:15:17,273 --> 01:15:18,517
Are you following me?
1117
01:15:19,673 --> 01:15:21,844
Since I was sure
you weren't following me.
1118
01:15:21,912 --> 01:15:24,148
I'm sorry, it's just...
1119
01:15:24,216 --> 01:15:26,965
- You thought I was Ted Bundy.
- Kind of.
1120
01:15:28,503 --> 01:15:30,740
My name's Gabriel... Bundy.
1121
01:15:30,807 --> 01:15:32,432
Sierra.
1122
01:15:33,782 --> 01:15:35,691
It's weird
that there's no cars at all.
1123
01:15:35,766 --> 01:15:37,871
Yeah, I'll say.
1124
01:15:37,942 --> 01:15:40,113
Anyway, my car
is parked over there.
1125
01:15:40,182 --> 01:15:42,799
It's not that far,
1126
01:15:42,869 --> 01:15:44,974
and if you want, I could
give you a ride to town.
1127
01:15:45,077 --> 01:15:47,149
That'd be great.
Thank you.
1128
01:15:47,188 --> 01:15:49,555
- Make up some karma.
- Please, lead the way.
1129
01:15:54,099 --> 01:15:55,309
Just a sec.
1130
01:16:00,530 --> 01:16:02,439
Okay, confession.
1131
01:16:02,514 --> 01:16:04,554
I kind of recognized you.
1132
01:16:05,521 --> 01:16:06,469
Really.
1133
01:16:06,545 --> 01:16:08,650
I wasn't sure,
but I think I saw a picture of you
1134
01:16:08,721 --> 01:16:11,022
in my boyfriend's
videogame magazine.
1135
01:16:11,088 --> 01:16:12,582
Right? You're, like, the shit.
1136
01:16:12,656 --> 01:16:13,605
No, no.
1137
01:16:13,680 --> 01:16:16,331
You're like the Quentin Tarantino
of their world,
1138
01:16:16,400 --> 01:16:17,861
videogame god.
1139
01:16:17,935 --> 01:16:20,007
- Not really, no.
- Fine.
1140
01:16:20,079 --> 01:16:22,534
You seriously recognized me
off one photo?
1141
01:16:22,607 --> 01:16:24,940
I thought you were
kind of hot, considering.
1142
01:16:25,007 --> 01:16:25,989
Considering?
1143
01:16:26,062 --> 01:16:28,484
Within the subset
of videogame people.
1144
01:16:29,742 --> 01:16:31,945
I wasn't masturbating
to your picture or anything.
1145
01:16:32,013 --> 01:16:32,962
I guess I'm flattered.
1146
01:16:33,037 --> 01:16:35,426
You should be.
I'm stingy with compliments.
1147
01:16:35,501 --> 01:16:37,191
Your boyfriend
plays videogames?
1148
01:16:38,156 --> 01:16:41,451
Ex-boyfriend.
And yes, way too many.
1149
01:16:41,516 --> 01:16:44,515
He used to play Evercrack
back in the day,
1150
01:16:44,587 --> 01:16:46,048
but your game was, like,
1151
01:16:46,123 --> 01:16:48,163
I don't know,
what's worse than crack?
1152
01:16:48,235 --> 01:16:49,282
Supercrack?
1153
01:16:49,355 --> 01:16:50,664
He was spending
40 hours a week
1154
01:16:50,730 --> 01:16:52,737
collecting Thunderleaf
or whatever,
1155
01:16:52,809 --> 01:16:56,421
and I was his mule, hauling it around,
'cause he ran out of space.
1156
01:16:56,489 --> 01:16:57,666
You had an account?
1157
01:16:57,737 --> 01:16:59,428
Part of your world,
and you didn't know it.
1158
01:16:59,497 --> 01:17:01,057
I'm sorry.
1159
01:17:01,128 --> 01:17:03,037
You can make it up to me.
1160
01:17:04,552 --> 01:17:05,534
Shit.
1161
01:17:10,119 --> 01:17:12,061
Come on, come on,
come on, come on.
1162
01:17:16,294 --> 01:17:19,326
And I am so sorry.
1163
01:17:20,613 --> 01:17:25,249
I understand.
It's not your fault, right?
1164
01:17:26,372 --> 01:17:28,227
It couldn't be your fault.
1165
01:17:29,284 --> 01:17:32,578
You're morally incapable
of doing the right thing.
1166
01:17:32,643 --> 01:17:33,691
- I don't...
- Right?
1167
01:17:34,722 --> 01:17:36,762
So, you play a lot
of characters at once?
1168
01:17:36,835 --> 01:17:39,518
A couple.
Most people do.
1169
01:17:39,618 --> 01:17:41,244
But you're not most people.
1170
01:17:41,282 --> 01:17:44,478
You created the world.
You know all the secret codes.
1171
01:17:44,545 --> 01:17:47,195
- What, like god mode?
- Is that what you call it?
1172
01:17:47,265 --> 01:17:50,014
It's when you have all the powers
and you can't be killed.
1173
01:17:50,080 --> 01:17:51,705
It's actually boring to play, though.
1174
01:17:51,776 --> 01:17:53,434
A game isn't fun
unless there are rules.
1175
01:17:53,504 --> 01:17:55,129
And you make the rules.
1176
01:17:56,767 --> 01:17:58,076
Yeah, I do.
1177
01:17:58,974 --> 01:18:00,381
Thanks.
1178
01:18:02,974 --> 01:18:04,632
Do you think that I'm pretty?
1179
01:18:06,270 --> 01:18:07,218
What?
1180
01:18:07,294 --> 01:18:08,919
Do you think I'm hot...
1181
01:18:08,989 --> 01:18:12,055
on a purely physical level?
1182
01:18:13,948 --> 01:18:14,897
Sure.
1183
01:18:15,868 --> 01:18:17,242
That's a rave.
1184
01:18:17,308 --> 01:18:19,348
Well, I don't know
why you're asking.
1185
01:18:19,420 --> 01:18:22,453
My ex-boyfriend the orc,
used to say,
1186
01:18:22,523 --> 01:18:23,984
"The thing that I like about you
1187
01:18:24,059 --> 01:18:27,124
is you're not so hot
I'm afraid I'm gonna lose you."
1188
01:18:27,194 --> 01:18:29,169
So where's the orc now?
1189
01:18:29,242 --> 01:18:30,354
He's dead.
1190
01:18:31,706 --> 01:18:34,771
I spiked his water bottle
with a massive quantity of GHB.
1191
01:18:34,841 --> 01:18:38,637
He hallucinated,
went into convulsions, and died.
1192
01:18:40,632 --> 01:18:42,704
Remind me not
to piss you off, Sarah.
1193
01:18:43,672 --> 01:18:44,654
Sierra!
1194
01:18:45,751 --> 01:18:46,928
Sorry.
1195
01:18:49,494 --> 01:18:52,145
What makes you think
you haven't pissed me off already?
1196
01:18:57,141 --> 01:18:58,261
How you doin', kiddo?
1197
01:19:00,181 --> 01:19:03,442
I was thinking we could all go
to El Cholo for dinner tonight.
1198
01:19:04,436 --> 01:19:06,858
How do you feel about
some blue corn enchiladas?
1199
01:19:06,931 --> 01:19:08,906
Should we ask Daddy
when he gets back?
1200
01:19:11,219 --> 01:19:12,560
He's not coming back.
1201
01:19:14,931 --> 01:19:16,337
How could you?
1202
01:19:16,466 --> 01:19:17,840
How could you?!
1203
01:19:18,738 --> 01:19:19,753
How could you.
1204
01:19:19,890 --> 01:19:20,937
How could you.
1205
01:19:22,289 --> 01:19:23,401
How could you...?
1206
01:19:24,305 --> 01:19:26,060
- How could you?
- Cut. Perfect.
1207
01:19:26,128 --> 01:19:27,754
I feel so dirty.
1208
01:19:27,825 --> 01:19:28,904
That's how I like it.
1209
01:19:47,117 --> 01:19:48,066
Wait.
1210
01:19:49,708 --> 01:19:51,366
Something's wrong.
1211
01:19:51,436 --> 01:19:52,680
I feel...
1212
01:20:12,617 --> 01:20:13,565
Wait.
1213
01:20:14,793 --> 01:20:18,109
I have a wife and a daughter.
They're waiting for me.
1214
01:20:18,184 --> 01:20:19,591
- Where are they?
- Back at the car.
1215
01:20:19,656 --> 01:20:20,604
Which direction?
1216
01:20:27,111 --> 01:20:28,932
Face it, G, you don't know
where they are.
1217
01:20:28,999 --> 01:20:30,176
You don't know where you are.
1218
01:20:30,246 --> 01:20:32,101
We've been walking
in circles for an hour.
1219
01:20:32,197 --> 01:20:35,393
- Where is your car?
- There is no car.
1220
01:20:35,429 --> 01:20:38,811
It was all a pretense,
an excuse to get you on your own.
1221
01:20:42,180 --> 01:20:43,740
You getting dizzy?
1222
01:20:44,740 --> 01:20:46,332
It's just the GHB in the water.
1223
01:20:48,035 --> 01:20:49,213
What's happening?
1224
01:20:49,763 --> 01:20:51,705
I'm sorry that it had
to come to this, G.
1225
01:20:51,779 --> 01:20:53,567
I promise it's gonna
be over soon.
1226
01:20:55,042 --> 01:20:56,318
You're trying to kill me?
1227
01:20:56,386 --> 01:20:59,801
No, this is not a murder.
It's an intervention.
1228
01:20:59,874 --> 01:21:02,361
Do you feel like a man?
You're not.
1229
01:21:02,433 --> 01:21:05,149
I had to get you away from her.
She was holding you back.
1230
01:21:05,217 --> 01:21:06,645
- You had to give her up.
- Melissa.
1231
01:21:06,720 --> 01:21:09,403
- Allee... allee... all come free!
- There's something wrong...
1232
01:21:09,472 --> 01:21:11,577
I can get you out of here,
1233
01:21:11,647 --> 01:21:13,337
but you have to trust me.
1234
01:21:13,407 --> 01:21:15,163
Do you feel like a man?
1235
01:21:15,231 --> 01:21:17,686
'Cause I'll tell you
a little secret.
1236
01:21:17,759 --> 01:21:19,514
You're not.
1237
01:21:35,580 --> 01:21:36,954
Why are you doing this?
1238
01:21:37,915 --> 01:21:39,442
You did this to yourself.
1239
01:21:40,539 --> 01:21:42,873
And admitting that
is the first step.
1240
01:21:44,570 --> 01:21:47,570
You're a crackhead, G.
1241
01:21:50,009 --> 01:21:53,424
Thing is, this planet
and these people,
1242
01:21:53,496 --> 01:21:55,438
they're your drug of choice.
1243
01:21:57,208 --> 01:21:59,379
It wasn't that hard
to make a universe.
1244
01:22:00,344 --> 01:22:03,409
At first you just checked in
every once in a while...
1245
01:22:03,478 --> 01:22:05,649
...see how the Neanderthals
were doing,
1246
01:22:05,718 --> 01:22:08,500
move a couple
of continents around.
1247
01:22:08,566 --> 01:22:10,933
But then you got
more into it.
1248
01:22:10,998 --> 01:22:13,932
You started playing a couple
of characters of your own.
1249
01:22:14,996 --> 01:22:17,614
Slaves, kings, messiahs.
1250
01:22:17,684 --> 01:22:19,823
Pretty soon you were playing 24/7.
1251
01:22:19,893 --> 01:22:21,169
How long have I been...
1252
01:22:21,236 --> 01:22:24,269
You've been gone
for 4,000 years,
1253
01:22:24,340 --> 01:22:26,761
not that time means
the same for us.
1254
01:22:27,730 --> 01:22:29,486
You came looking for me?
1255
01:22:29,554 --> 01:22:32,009
That's what a girl does.
1256
01:22:32,082 --> 01:22:33,675
Why now?
1257
01:22:33,746 --> 01:22:36,331
Because you forgot
who you were.
1258
01:22:36,402 --> 01:22:38,311
You forgot this wasn't real.
1259
01:22:38,386 --> 01:22:41,320
We couldn't just storm in
on a fiery chariot.
1260
01:22:41,393 --> 01:22:44,262
It was your universe.
We had to play by your rules.
1261
01:22:44,336 --> 01:22:48,013
We had to show you how limited
and corrupt your little world was.
1262
01:22:48,080 --> 01:22:51,941
Don't get me wrong,
it's a nice place.
1263
01:22:53,359 --> 01:22:54,536
It's cozy...
1264
01:22:55,438 --> 01:22:57,926
...but do you remember
where you came from?
1265
01:23:05,549 --> 01:23:08,004
Do you remember
where you came from?
1266
01:23:08,972 --> 01:23:10,346
It was warm.
1267
01:23:12,907 --> 01:23:16,136
And white, like a...
1268
01:23:16,203 --> 01:23:18,690
You can't describe it
with human words.
1269
01:23:18,762 --> 01:23:21,151
You can't think it
with human thoughts.
1270
01:23:21,226 --> 01:23:23,080
We need you to come back.
1271
01:23:24,617 --> 01:23:25,730
With us.
1272
01:23:27,401 --> 01:23:28,677
Come back with me.
1273
01:23:37,191 --> 01:23:37,415
You can destroy the world
with a single thought.
1274
01:23:37,415 --> 01:23:39,749
You can destroy the world
with a single thought.
1275
01:23:40,999 --> 01:23:45,057
Don't, incidentally.
Just file that away.
1276
01:23:45,126 --> 01:23:48,159
The truth is you hold all the cards.
1277
01:23:48,230 --> 01:23:53,182
When people pray, they
don't want this thing or that thing.
1278
01:23:53,253 --> 01:23:55,904
They just... they don't
want to be forgotten.
1279
01:23:55,973 --> 01:23:57,827
You understand?
1280
01:23:57,892 --> 01:23:58,874
Noelle?
1281
01:23:58,948 --> 01:24:00,955
I would have
told you earlier, but...
1282
01:24:01,028 --> 01:24:02,140
Noelle?!
1283
01:24:11,042 --> 01:24:14,357
Maybe if I just cut back;
didn't get so involved.
1284
01:24:14,433 --> 01:24:16,221
We both know
that'll never work.
1285
01:24:16,290 --> 01:24:18,907
Next week you'll be back here
redesigning the pinecones.
1286
01:24:18,976 --> 01:24:21,725
You have to quit, cold turkey.
1287
01:24:21,824 --> 01:24:22,904
I can't.
1288
01:24:22,944 --> 01:24:26,042
You can,
but I can't force you to leave.
1289
01:24:26,111 --> 01:24:27,289
You have to want it.
1290
01:24:43,741 --> 01:24:45,366
Noelle!
1291
01:24:47,420 --> 01:24:50,485
Come on!
Answer Mama!
1292
01:24:51,804 --> 01:24:53,429
Answer me!
1293
01:24:56,474 --> 01:24:57,652
She's here.
1294
01:24:58,650 --> 01:25:01,039
I didn't forget
about you guys.
1295
01:25:03,929 --> 01:25:05,522
Everything okay?
1296
01:25:06,489 --> 01:25:09,685
Yeah, everything's fine.
Absolutely.
1297
01:25:09,752 --> 01:25:11,214
Let's go home.
1298
01:26:14,957 --> 01:26:16,386
Good night, Jellybean.
1299
01:27:19,523 --> 01:27:21,595
You need to go, don't you?
1300
01:27:22,914 --> 01:27:24,191
No.
1301
01:27:25,186 --> 01:27:26,495
I can stay.
1302
01:27:26,562 --> 01:27:28,667
How long, forever?
1303
01:27:28,738 --> 01:27:31,836
Every day you'd be here,
you'd know what you were missing.
1304
01:27:33,664 --> 01:27:35,835
What happens if you go?
1305
01:27:35,904 --> 01:27:38,326
Worst case scenario?
1306
01:27:42,303 --> 01:27:46,525
Disintegration of everything
into a fiery void, oblivio accebit.
1307
01:27:46,591 --> 01:27:48,314
The end of everything.
1308
01:27:48,382 --> 01:27:50,357
That's all?
1309
01:27:50,430 --> 01:27:52,285
Probably wouldn't happen.
1310
01:27:53,533 --> 01:27:56,216
I guess I'm more worried
about the human factor.
1311
01:27:56,285 --> 01:27:58,773
You guys kill each other a lot.
1312
01:27:58,845 --> 01:28:00,917
In fairness, it's usually in your name.
1313
01:28:00,989 --> 01:28:03,443
Plus, we've gotten
much more efficient at it.
1314
01:28:04,412 --> 01:28:06,266
I like this world.
1315
01:28:08,283 --> 01:28:11,631
I like my life here
with you and Noelle.
1316
01:28:11,739 --> 01:28:12,851
It's not real.
1317
01:28:14,394 --> 01:28:15,855
I'm not really your wife.
1318
01:28:15,930 --> 01:28:18,035
You're not really my husband.
1319
01:28:19,418 --> 01:28:21,654
On some level, it's all pretend.
1320
01:28:24,729 --> 01:28:26,616
How many versions were there?
1321
01:28:27,736 --> 01:28:30,834
Ninety.
This is the last one.
1322
01:28:33,815 --> 01:28:37,524
I've destroyed billions of people
with a thought...
1323
01:28:38,486 --> 01:28:40,591
and you'd like to think
that it's painless.
1324
01:28:40,662 --> 01:28:42,003
Stop.
1325
01:28:43,605 --> 01:28:47,499
You don't have to explain
or apologize.
1326
01:28:48,661 --> 01:28:52,489
Everything that is
is because of you.
1327
01:28:56,148 --> 01:29:00,424
And if that's all there is,
that's enough.
1328
01:29:08,882 --> 01:29:10,125
So.
1329
01:29:10,289 --> 01:29:11,696
So.
1330
01:29:12,944 --> 01:29:15,497
Guess you don't really
need to pack anything.
1331
01:29:18,064 --> 01:29:19,241
I'm good.
1332
01:29:19,311 --> 01:29:20,424
You're great.
1333
01:29:21,872 --> 01:29:26,061
- It has been a pleasure.
- Likewise.
1334
01:29:28,334 --> 01:29:29,960
I love you.
1335
01:29:30,030 --> 01:29:33,739
I love you, too,
you big lug.
1336
01:29:41,132 --> 01:29:42,724
You're my favorite.
1337
01:30:39,267 --> 01:30:41,307
...should we measure it first?
1338
01:30:41,378 --> 01:30:43,288
Got flour, we have flour.
1339
01:30:43,361 --> 01:30:44,855
All right, so I need oil.
1340
01:30:44,929 --> 01:30:46,107
We need nutmeg.
1341
01:30:46,178 --> 01:30:47,933
Honey, do we have nutmeg?
1342
01:30:50,240 --> 01:30:51,385
We should.
1343
01:30:52,705 --> 01:30:54,297
Good. Good, good, good.
1344
01:30:54,368 --> 01:30:56,278
- Nutmeg.
- Cinnamon, too.
1345
01:30:56,351 --> 01:30:59,450
If I had a horse,
I would name her Cinnamon.
1346
01:30:59,520 --> 01:31:01,624
- And if I had another horse...
- Nutmeg?
1347
01:31:01,695 --> 01:31:02,972
No, Flash.
1348
01:31:03,039 --> 01:31:04,948
What? Why Flash?
1349
01:31:05,054 --> 01:31:06,680
I mean, I would name her Flash
1350
01:31:06,718 --> 01:31:09,205
because she'd be
the fastest horse in the world.
1351
01:31:09,277 --> 01:31:10,521
I mean in the whole world.
1352
01:31:10,589 --> 01:31:12,694
- In the whole world?
- Ever whole.
1353
01:31:12,765 --> 01:31:15,252
The ever whole world?
That's pretty good.
1354
01:31:15,325 --> 01:31:16,372
That's pretty fast.
1355
01:31:16,445 --> 01:31:19,292
Yes, and I would be a princess.
1356
01:31:19,356 --> 01:31:20,665
Sweetie?
1357
01:31:23,899 --> 01:31:27,761
This might sound really strange,
but what's my name?
1358
01:31:32,122 --> 01:31:33,104
Mommy.
1359
01:31:34,170 --> 01:31:36,373
Right. Exactly.
1360
01:31:36,441 --> 01:31:38,994
He's not coming back.
1361
01:31:40,473 --> 01:31:42,196
But it's gonna be okay.
1362
01:31:42,264 --> 01:31:45,013
He put all the pieces together.
1363
01:31:45,080 --> 01:31:48,113
- It's like...
- The best of all possible worlds.
1364
01:31:50,391 --> 01:31:52,693
Honey, is it supposed
to stick like this?
1365
01:31:53,975 --> 01:31:57,073
- Better help him.
- Let's go.
1366
01:31:57,142 --> 01:31:59,476
- Do you see what I'm talking about?
- Oh, my gosh.
1367
01:31:59,541 --> 01:32:02,126
...consistency.
Is it maybe a little... it's too thick.
1368
01:32:02,229 --> 01:32:03,755
We can safely say
that's too thick?
1369
01:32:03,796 --> 01:32:05,706
Will you get some milk?
1370
01:32:05,780 --> 01:32:09,042
- Get milk?
- See, it says milk on the recipe.
1371
01:32:09,108 --> 01:32:10,056
Ready?
1372
01:32:11,027 --> 01:32:12,882
Oh, my. Oh, no!
All right.
1373
01:32:12,947 --> 01:32:15,183
Oh, don't mess it up.
Don't mess it up.
1374
01:32:16,563 --> 01:32:17,741
Thank you.
1375
01:32:17,811 --> 01:32:20,079
Shouldn't we
be using a machine?
1376
01:32:20,146 --> 01:32:22,568
- Isn't there a machine we can...
- I'm the machine!
1377
01:32:22,641 --> 01:32:23,950
You're our machine?
1378
01:32:24,913 --> 01:32:26,473
- All right.
- Come on, machine.
1379
01:32:26,545 --> 01:32:28,454
Okay, hold on. Let's...