1
00:00:45,678 --> 00:00:50,816
Seasoned crooks swear you only remember
two days about your stretch in jail:
2
00:00:50,818 --> 00:00:52,484
The day you get in...
3
00:00:54,789 --> 00:00:56,755
- Oh, boy.
- ...and the day you get out.
4
00:01:00,427 --> 00:01:02,394
But I'll tell you,
those guys,
5
00:01:02,396 --> 00:01:04,229
they never been
to a Polish prison.
6
00:01:04,231 --> 00:01:06,632
'Cause, buddy, you don't forget
a second of your stay
7
00:01:06,634 --> 00:01:09,268
in the Warsaw penal system.
8
00:01:13,674 --> 00:01:14,373
Oh, boy.
9
00:01:14,375 --> 00:01:19,711
And you never stop thinking about
what you done that got you there,
10
00:01:19,713 --> 00:01:22,247
and what you're going to
do when you get out.
11
00:01:22,249 --> 00:01:25,818
And who you're going
to do it to.
12
00:01:29,789 --> 00:01:32,424
I reckon it takes
a betrayal before you realize
13
00:01:32,426 --> 00:01:37,729
the real currency in the world
ain't money... it's trust.
14
00:01:39,833 --> 00:01:43,569
Hey. So, guess
I'm topsies, huh?
15
00:01:45,706 --> 00:01:50,209
'Cause if you got no trust...
16
00:01:50,211 --> 00:01:52,711
Oh, boy.
17
00:01:52,713 --> 00:01:55,581
then what do you got?
18
00:02:07,460 --> 00:02:11,463
Now, there's no such thing
as one last big job,
19
00:02:11,465 --> 00:02:13,699
but Poland was pretty close.
20
00:02:14,901 --> 00:02:16,468
We were doing a smooth switch
21
00:02:16,470 --> 00:02:18,871
using a standard base
to our scam.
22
00:02:18,873 --> 00:02:21,140
The first thing you
need is a mark.
23
00:02:21,142 --> 00:02:24,143
Stash Bartkowiak was just like
all the others:
24
00:02:24,145 --> 00:02:28,247
rich, corrupt and most
definitely dangerous.
25
00:02:28,249 --> 00:02:31,517
So Stash picks up a stolen Gauguin
ripped from an Oslo gallery
26
00:02:31,519 --> 00:02:33,418
by a couple of smash
and grabbers.
27
00:02:33,420 --> 00:02:35,387
So, of course, he wants to
get the painting authenticated.
28
00:02:35,389 --> 00:02:37,356
But what he didn't know,
29
00:02:37,358 --> 00:02:40,826
was the man he turned to
was Nicky Calhoun.
30
00:02:40,828 --> 00:02:43,629
And Nicky Calhoun
is my half-brother.
31
00:02:43,631 --> 00:02:47,432
A crew needs an idea man
and ours was Nicky.
32
00:02:47,434 --> 00:02:50,469
Paddy McCarthy,
he was our Rolodex,
33
00:02:50,471 --> 00:02:52,671
the guy who knows
any guy you need to know.
34
00:02:52,673 --> 00:02:55,641
And Guy De Cornet
was our forger.
35
00:02:55,643 --> 00:02:57,743
Best scratcher I've ever known.
36
00:02:57,745 --> 00:03:00,812
Now there was a time,
if you ask anyone in our game,
37
00:03:00,814 --> 00:03:03,715
who the best damn wheelman
around was,
38
00:03:03,717 --> 00:03:07,252
and I'm guaranteeing you, you're going
to hear the name Crunch Calhoun.
39
00:03:07,254 --> 00:03:10,355
And that's got nothing to do
with how fast I drive
40
00:03:10,357 --> 00:03:12,558
and everything to do
with trust.
41
00:03:12,560 --> 00:03:15,427
'Cause without that
you've got anarchy.
42
00:03:15,429 --> 00:03:16,962
I like that jacket.
43
00:03:16,964 --> 00:03:18,830
Well, clothes tell
you a lot about the man.
44
00:03:18,832 --> 00:03:20,465
That's why it's a saying.
45
00:03:20,467 --> 00:03:22,301
I don't know, Nicky.
Take Guy there.
46
00:03:22,303 --> 00:03:25,537
The only thing his fancy white
leotard tells me is that
47
00:03:25,539 --> 00:03:27,439
he ain't circumcised.
48
00:03:27,441 --> 00:03:29,908
- You misunderstand fashion.
- Fatsoes. Look at you.
49
00:03:29,910 --> 00:03:31,810
- Fatsoes?
- Women go crazy for this...
50
00:03:31,812 --> 00:03:33,745
Boys! There it is!
51
00:03:36,382 --> 00:03:38,617
I'll see you
at the lab, Crunch.
52
00:03:48,561 --> 00:03:51,363
Don't touch the art, lad.
All alarmed.
53
00:04:08,314 --> 00:04:11,450
Wow! Love the track suits.
54
00:04:11,452 --> 00:04:14,620
Fellas, I'd like you to meet
Professor O'Connor.
55
00:04:14,622 --> 00:04:16,822
Doc, these are the fellas.
56
00:04:16,824 --> 00:04:20,392
As I said, Dr. "O" here,
is real discreet.
57
00:04:20,394 --> 00:04:22,394
Very discreet, gentlemen.
58
00:04:24,564 --> 00:04:29,668
Oh. Paul Gauguin.
"Tahitian Beach," 1893.
59
00:04:29,670 --> 00:04:32,271
Painting is stolen.
But is real?
60
00:04:32,273 --> 00:04:35,841
We'll see.
Needs a density scan.
61
00:04:35,843 --> 00:04:37,643
What is density scan?
62
00:04:37,645 --> 00:04:40,912
I'm not so sure myself,
but doctor knows best.
63
00:04:58,031 --> 00:05:03,635
OK, great. So a guy
walks into a bar with a monkey.
64
00:05:18,084 --> 00:05:21,820
Oh. What is this?
65
00:05:21,822 --> 00:05:23,822
What?
66
00:05:23,824 --> 00:05:26,358
- No, no, no, no, no.
- What?
67
00:05:26,360 --> 00:05:28,393
- More red. More red.
- No, no, no, no, no.
68
00:05:28,395 --> 00:05:29,828
Don't do this, Guy, please.
You're killing me.
69
00:05:29,830 --> 00:05:31,930
They're identical.
Just swap the frames!
70
00:05:31,932 --> 00:05:33,565
My work...
71
00:05:33,567 --> 00:05:35,701
Oh fuck, Guy! Come on,
they're identical!
72
00:05:35,703 --> 00:05:38,704
- Just change them!
- My work must be perfect-o!
73
00:05:40,707 --> 00:05:42,407
You've got five minutes.
74
00:05:43,576 --> 00:05:45,844
So I say,
"I'm looking for Mario."
75
00:05:45,846 --> 00:05:48,980
And this kid says, "There's
a thousand Marios in Naples."
76
00:05:48,982 --> 00:05:51,983
I say, "Yeah,
but this one's a criminal."
77
00:05:51,985 --> 00:05:54,453
And he goes, "Two thousand!"
78
00:05:56,924 --> 00:05:59,791
Guy. Guy.
79
00:05:59,793 --> 00:06:02,561
Guy! They will fuckin' kill
Nicky and Paddy
80
00:06:02,563 --> 00:06:04,930
if I don't make it
back there in time!
81
00:06:04,932 --> 00:06:09,601
Guy, you got ten seconds.
That's it. Ten!
82
00:06:09,603 --> 00:06:15,440
Nine, eight, seven, six, five.
Put it in.
83
00:06:15,442 --> 00:06:20,011
- Three, two, one. Now!
- Au revoir.
84
00:06:20,013 --> 00:06:23,582
Ah, fuck!
85
00:06:32,759 --> 00:06:33,959
Bastard!
86
00:06:37,997 --> 00:06:41,566
So naturally I tell the Turkish
prostitute, "I'll take two."
87
00:07:11,197 --> 00:07:15,500
So are any of you guys
Ukrainian?
88
00:07:15,502 --> 00:07:17,669
No? OK then.
89
00:07:29,182 --> 00:07:31,082
Ah, fuck!
90
00:08:04,951 --> 00:08:09,955
She's a genuine Gauguin, boys.
Priceless.
91
00:08:15,695 --> 00:08:17,696
I don't believe this.
92
00:08:17,698 --> 00:08:20,665
There's millions of dollars of
paintings and we're doing nothing.
93
00:08:20,667 --> 00:08:22,901
- Leave it, lad.
- This is Poland!
94
00:08:22,903 --> 00:08:25,103
We can do whatever
the fuck we want.
95
00:08:25,105 --> 00:08:28,907
Nicky, boy, the Gauguin's worth more than
five rooms of paintings in this place
96
00:08:28,909 --> 00:08:30,008
and they're all alarmed.
97
00:08:30,010 --> 00:08:31,977
Are you kidding me?
98
00:08:31,979 --> 00:08:33,078
There's no alarms.
99
00:08:36,282 --> 00:08:37,649
There's alarms.
100
00:09:03,809 --> 00:09:05,610
Boys, let's all split up!
101
00:09:05,612 --> 00:09:09,981
Train to Berlin. Ten AM.
Bright and early like!
102
00:09:11,151 --> 00:09:13,118
Shit!
103
00:09:24,664 --> 00:09:29,868
Go! Here. What are you...
what are you...?! Wrong way!
104
00:09:32,339 --> 00:09:34,906
That crash
was a stroke of luck.
105
00:09:34,908 --> 00:09:39,110
And the cops showed up before
Stash could kill him.
106
00:09:40,813 --> 00:09:42,314
Uh...
107
00:09:42,316 --> 00:09:45,784
Did I tell you the one
about the, uh,
108
00:09:45,786 --> 00:09:48,253
three prostitutes
and the bruised melon?
109
00:09:51,158 --> 00:09:53,058
We only want painting back.
110
00:09:53,060 --> 00:09:55,927
One painting, one arrest.
111
00:09:55,929 --> 00:09:58,630
It could be you or someone else.
112
00:10:00,633 --> 00:10:06,371
You have record in Europe,
so that's 20 years sentence.
113
00:10:07,640 --> 00:10:09,140
We make deal, huh?
114
00:10:09,142 --> 00:10:12,944
The painting and a fall guy.
115
00:10:14,614 --> 00:10:18,049
For Nicky, I figure
it was just basic math.
116
00:10:18,051 --> 00:10:20,885
He's facing 20 years
and I got a clean sheet.
117
00:10:20,887 --> 00:10:23,655
I can't blame him for that.
118
00:10:23,657 --> 00:10:24,923
But I can hate him for it.
119
00:10:27,628 --> 00:10:29,361
Oh, boy.
120
00:10:47,880 --> 00:10:50,081
So I went home.
121
00:10:50,083 --> 00:10:53,385
And I couldn't go back
to the life.
122
00:10:53,387 --> 00:10:56,021
The trust was gone.
123
00:10:56,023 --> 00:10:57,989
Crew was gone.
124
00:10:57,991 --> 00:11:00,692
And everybody went
their separate ways.
125
00:11:00,694 --> 00:11:03,395
And I met a girl.
126
00:11:03,397 --> 00:11:05,664
Someone I could bank on.
127
00:11:05,666 --> 00:11:07,666
And even if I couldn't, buddy,
I'll tell you,
128
00:11:07,668 --> 00:11:10,769
she wasn't the worst person
I shared a bunk with lately.
129
00:11:10,771 --> 00:11:13,371
But I could bank on Francie.
130
00:11:13,373 --> 00:11:17,442
Francie was a young buck I caught
pinching hubcaps off my truck.
131
00:11:17,444 --> 00:11:20,412
Most folks probably would have called
the cops, but I gave him a job.
132
00:11:20,414 --> 00:11:25,684
'Cause every now and then, you
got to take a leap of faith.
133
00:11:25,686 --> 00:11:29,721
Hey, Crunch. Lace 'em up.
134
00:11:32,058 --> 00:11:35,927
The only way we're gonna get the crowd
tomorrow is if you take a dive today.
135
00:11:35,929 --> 00:11:38,697
Nope, not gonna happen,
not again.
136
00:11:38,699 --> 00:11:40,098
It pains me to say it,
Crunch,
137
00:11:40,100 --> 00:11:41,866
but the only reason
why these folks are here
138
00:11:41,868 --> 00:11:43,902
is in the hope that
you crack your skull open.
139
00:11:43,904 --> 00:11:47,038
You have to crash your bike.
That's what you do.
140
00:11:47,040 --> 00:11:50,208
[man on P.A.) A 188 stitches,
26 broken bones.
141
00:11:50,210 --> 00:11:54,079
Twelve totaled bikes.
Three comas.
142
00:11:54,081 --> 00:11:56,181
Twice pronounced legally dead.
143
00:11:56,183 --> 00:12:02,020
- I'll give you $700.
- The one, the only, Crunch Calhoun!
144
00:12:03,422 --> 00:12:05,123
Let me say this out loud,
145
00:12:05,125 --> 00:12:07,058
'cause I can't believe
my own ears.
146
00:12:07,060 --> 00:12:10,261
You expect me to deliberately
take a dive, risk my life,
147
00:12:10,263 --> 00:12:12,764
for 700 bucks?
148
00:12:14,134 --> 00:12:16,468
- Twelve.
- Seven.
149
00:12:16,470 --> 00:12:18,203
- Eleven.
- Six.
150
00:12:18,205 --> 00:12:20,271
- Eight.
- Deal.
151
00:12:20,273 --> 00:12:21,506
Call the ambulance.
152
00:12:21,508 --> 00:12:23,975
♪ Fire
153
00:12:23,977 --> 00:12:28,413
♪ The righteous won't sink
if they're on fire ♪
154
00:12:28,415 --> 00:12:30,215
Ladies and gentlemen,
155
00:12:30,217 --> 00:12:32,016
let's give old Crunch
a moment of silence
156
00:12:32,018 --> 00:12:36,855
as he prepares to go down, down,
down into the ring of fire!
157
00:12:36,857 --> 00:12:38,456
How'd she do? Tell
me at least a thousand.
158
00:12:38,458 --> 00:12:41,926
No, $800. So just
don't do it, Crunch.
159
00:12:41,928 --> 00:12:44,095
I'll pay you $800
not to spill 'er.
160
00:12:44,097 --> 00:12:46,397
If you got $800,
I'm payin' you too much.
161
00:12:46,399 --> 00:12:49,901
Just don't do it, bud.
162
00:12:49,903 --> 00:12:52,904
I'll be all right,
Francie. Besides,
163
00:12:52,906 --> 00:12:54,773
"Fortune favors the bold."
164
00:12:54,775 --> 00:12:56,341
Who said that one?
165
00:12:56,343 --> 00:12:58,843
- Virgil.
- Right.
166
00:13:11,191 --> 00:13:14,793
♪ A candy-colored clown
they call the sandman ♪
167
00:13:14,795 --> 00:13:18,463
♪ Tiptoes to my room
every night ♪
168
00:13:18,465 --> 00:13:22,100
♪ Just to sprinkle stardust
and to whisper ♪
169
00:13:22,102 --> 00:13:27,138
♪ "Go to sleep,
everything is all right" ♪
170
00:13:28,208 --> 00:13:33,044
♪ I close my eyes
171
00:13:33,046 --> 00:13:37,549
♪ Then I drift away
172
00:13:37,551 --> 00:13:41,486
♪ Into the magic night
173
00:13:41,488 --> 00:13:46,324
♪ I softly say
174
00:13:46,326 --> 00:13:51,095
♪ "Oh, smile and pray
175
00:13:51,097 --> 00:13:55,466
♪ Like dreamers do
176
00:13:55,468 --> 00:13:58,837
♪ Then I fall asleep...
177
00:14:03,577 --> 00:14:07,111
Excuse me, sir. Would you
consent to a voluntary search?
178
00:14:11,984 --> 00:14:12,984
Right this way, please.
179
00:14:12,986 --> 00:14:15,587
Bad luck, chief.
180
00:14:18,324 --> 00:14:19,991
Thank you.
181
00:14:24,129 --> 00:14:25,864
Ground rules,
same as last time.
182
00:14:25,866 --> 00:14:27,232
You talk when
I tell you to talk
183
00:14:27,234 --> 00:14:29,167
and when I don't,
you do not talk.
184
00:14:29,169 --> 00:14:31,302
Don't bark at me.
I'm not your dog.
185
00:14:31,304 --> 00:14:33,238
Did I say to talk?
186
00:14:33,240 --> 00:14:35,273
Because I don't recall
telling you to talk.
187
00:14:35,275 --> 00:14:37,275
How many more times
must I do your job
188
00:14:37,277 --> 00:14:40,011
before I've paid my
proverbial debt to society?
189
00:14:40,013 --> 00:14:44,015
Warning: You make me look
stupid, I will crush you.
190
00:14:45,417 --> 00:14:48,086
- That looked hot.
- Yes, a little bit.
191
00:14:48,088 --> 00:14:49,921
We're going to start
with "good cop, bad cop".
192
00:14:49,923 --> 00:14:51,389
- I'm not a cop.
- OK.
193
00:14:51,391 --> 00:14:53,458
How about "good cop,
just do what I fuckin' say"?
194
00:14:53,460 --> 00:14:55,193
You're not a cop.
195
00:14:55,195 --> 00:14:59,063
Correction. The "pol" in
Interpol, it stands for police.
196
00:14:59,065 --> 00:15:00,365
Then where is your pistol?
197
00:15:00,367 --> 00:15:02,033
I don't need a gun.
198
00:15:02,035 --> 00:15:04,135
I've got something far more
dangerous than that.
199
00:15:04,137 --> 00:15:07,071
Is it a whistle that you blow
to summon the real police
200
00:15:07,073 --> 00:15:08,907
when a crime
is being committed?
201
00:15:08,909 --> 00:15:11,175
No. It's actually a pen.
202
00:15:11,177 --> 00:15:14,379
And, with it,
I can deny your parole.
203
00:15:14,381 --> 00:15:17,382
So why don't you shut the hell
up and follow my lead?
204
00:15:19,051 --> 00:15:21,219
Where's the fucking painting,
fucko?
205
00:15:22,454 --> 00:15:25,189
Whoa.
206
00:15:25,191 --> 00:15:28,693
My name is Agent Bick. This is
my associate, Samuel Winter.
207
00:15:29,962 --> 00:15:31,462
I know Sam.
208
00:15:31,464 --> 00:15:33,197
Sam, what are you doing
with Dirty Harry, here?
209
00:15:33,199 --> 00:15:35,600
You know how they pair
professional athletes
210
00:15:35,602 --> 00:15:37,402
- with slow kids?
- Yep.
211
00:15:37,404 --> 00:15:39,170
It's kind of like that.
212
00:15:40,372 --> 00:15:43,541
Two weeks ago, this painting
"Model, Rear-View"
213
00:15:43,543 --> 00:15:47,011
by Georges Seurat was stolen by
an art collector in Mexico City
214
00:15:47,013 --> 00:15:48,579
by a woman we had
under surveillance.
215
00:15:48,581 --> 00:15:51,716
Yeah, I've never seen
that woman before...
216
00:15:51,718 --> 00:15:53,184
before yesterday.
217
00:15:53,186 --> 00:15:55,553
Do I look like
a fucking clown to you?
218
00:15:55,555 --> 00:15:59,023
Clowns try to be funny. You're
just unintentionally hysterical.
219
00:15:59,918 --> 00:16:03,361
Shut your giggle hole
and open the damn case.
220
00:16:03,363 --> 00:16:07,598
It's called "Tio Puno Loco".
221
00:16:07,600 --> 00:16:10,301
Which translates
"Uncle Crazy Fist."
222
00:16:10,303 --> 00:16:13,438
Now, if you gentlemen will excuse
me, I've got to water ski...
223
00:16:13,440 --> 00:16:16,975
Sit down! Winter,
this is not "pointerism".
224
00:16:16,977 --> 00:16:19,377
Every painting tells a story.
225
00:16:20,412 --> 00:16:22,280
All good art tells a story.
226
00:16:22,282 --> 00:16:24,315
This one tells two.
227
00:16:25,484 --> 00:16:28,319
Say Nicky here
is stopped at Customs.
228
00:16:28,321 --> 00:16:32,490
All they see is this rubbish,
229
00:16:32,492 --> 00:16:35,360
not the masterpiece underneath.
230
00:16:35,362 --> 00:16:39,163
Acetate solution loosens
the top acrylic layer.
231
00:16:39,165 --> 00:16:45,136
Peel it on back and you're left with
the original oil painting underneath.
232
00:16:45,138 --> 00:16:48,039
What the fuck is that?
233
00:16:48,041 --> 00:16:52,710
It's a marvelous picture.
I'm delighted to have it as
part of my collection.
234
00:16:52,712 --> 00:16:58,449
Well, boys, have a nice day.
235
00:16:58,451 --> 00:17:00,318
Where's the Seurat?!
236
00:17:00,320 --> 00:17:03,388
Long gone.
237
00:17:08,093 --> 00:17:10,028
- Sunny.
- Yeah. How'd it go?
238
00:17:10,030 --> 00:17:11,496
Ah, it went.
239
00:17:11,498 --> 00:17:14,065
Bad luck, chief.
240
00:17:17,136 --> 00:17:18,736
You got the money?
241
00:17:20,205 --> 00:17:21,372
There you go.
242
00:17:23,375 --> 00:17:24,575
It feels a little light.
243
00:17:24,577 --> 00:17:26,077
Well, why don't you open it?
244
00:17:27,613 --> 00:17:29,213
"I'm sorry.
245
00:17:30,349 --> 00:17:31,682
I'm sorry for hitting you
with a lead pipe."
246
00:17:31,684 --> 00:17:33,718
What the fuck...
247
00:17:46,065 --> 00:17:48,299
Crunch, honey,
we're out of ice.
248
00:17:48,301 --> 00:17:50,701
Oh yeah, all right.
249
00:17:53,205 --> 00:17:54,572
Thank you, Crunchie.
250
00:17:54,574 --> 00:17:55,673
Adios, fellas.
251
00:17:55,675 --> 00:17:58,242
Ice? $50 for ice?
252
00:17:58,244 --> 00:17:59,544
It's wintertime.
253
00:17:59,546 --> 00:18:01,579
Crunch, she's, she's not
even trying anymore.
254
00:18:01,581 --> 00:18:03,648
Happy wife,
happy life, right?
255
00:18:03,650 --> 00:18:05,349
So you say.
256
00:18:05,351 --> 00:18:07,819
Oh, I don't know, Francie.
257
00:18:07,821 --> 00:18:11,622
When I was a young buck
I thought I'd make history,
258
00:18:11,624 --> 00:18:15,193
not just sit there
reading about it.
259
00:18:17,396 --> 00:18:20,198
Hell, I thought
I'd be a great man.
260
00:18:20,200 --> 00:18:22,500
OK, so you're not...
261
00:18:22,502 --> 00:18:26,304
stereotypically great,
like Alexander the Great.
262
00:18:26,306 --> 00:18:31,309
But you're great like,
great like, like...
263
00:18:31,311 --> 00:18:32,844
You're a great guy!
264
00:18:32,846 --> 00:18:36,481
Great men don't take dives
for a couple of hundred bucks.
265
00:18:37,783 --> 00:18:41,586
And great men
don't miss their fate.
266
00:18:41,588 --> 00:18:45,223
Somewhere along the line I...
267
00:18:45,225 --> 00:18:48,192
I missed mine, Francie.
268
00:18:48,194 --> 00:18:51,262
I was probably staring at
it the whole time and I just...
269
00:18:52,664 --> 00:18:54,565
I missed it.
270
00:18:56,802 --> 00:19:01,405
My God, you're a downer.
A fuckin' boner killer.
271
00:19:01,407 --> 00:19:04,442
And what are you going to do? Are you
gonna sell fuckin' insurance or something?
272
00:19:04,444 --> 00:19:07,812
Just shut the fuck up
and cheer up, please.
273
00:19:09,649 --> 00:19:11,649
Allow me.
274
00:19:13,318 --> 00:19:15,520
Yo, Dennis Calhoun?
275
00:19:15,522 --> 00:19:17,688
Who's asking?
276
00:19:17,690 --> 00:19:20,458
- It's fuckin' Sunny.
- Sounds about right.
277
00:19:20,460 --> 00:19:25,429
Hey, Crunch, there's some guy with
an eye-patch here to see you.
278
00:19:41,180 --> 00:19:43,548
Oh, easy, man!
279
00:19:43,550 --> 00:19:45,850
Where's your fuckin' brother?
280
00:19:45,852 --> 00:19:48,892
I was gonna cut bait and go home then I
realized Nicky said he had a brother.
281
00:19:52,325 --> 00:19:54,892
Oww. Fuck!
282
00:19:56,562 --> 00:20:01,465
Sweet Baby Jesus.
What are you, a pirate?
283
00:20:02,868 --> 00:20:05,403
Hey, hey, hey. Look! I don't
know where Nicky is, all right.
284
00:20:05,405 --> 00:20:07,572
- He said you work with him.
- Yeah, a long time ago.
285
00:20:07,574 --> 00:20:10,308
Now, look, I got like $300
stashed in the bedroom there.
286
00:20:10,310 --> 00:20:13,244
It's yours. A guy in your line of
work might prefer doubloons...
287
00:20:13,246 --> 00:20:14,412
I'm not a fuckin' pirate!
288
00:20:16,816 --> 00:20:18,649
I don't even talk to Nicky.
I hate him.
289
00:20:18,651 --> 00:20:21,352
Here's what's what.
I want the 30 grand
290
00:20:21,354 --> 00:20:23,521
- or I want that fuckin' painting.
- What painting?
291
00:20:23,523 --> 00:20:24,689
The Seurat.
292
00:20:24,691 --> 00:20:26,357
Whoa! Whoa! What?
293
00:20:26,359 --> 00:20:27,658
- The Seurat!
- What?
294
00:20:27,660 --> 00:20:30,428
The Georges Seurat,
you ignorant fuck!
295
00:20:30,430 --> 00:20:32,630
The seminal French
"Post-Impressionalist".
296
00:20:32,632 --> 00:20:34,298
The father of pointillism.
297
00:20:34,300 --> 00:20:36,767
That Georges Seurat,
you fuckin' baboon.
298
00:20:36,769 --> 00:20:39,270
Now I want the 30 grand,
299
00:20:39,272 --> 00:20:40,504
the painting
300
00:20:40,506 --> 00:20:42,840
or a bullet in your
fucking head!
301
00:20:46,346 --> 00:20:48,312
Hey, uh...
302
00:20:48,314 --> 00:20:51,015
- Crunch, is everything OK?
- Yeah.
303
00:20:51,017 --> 00:20:53,818
What... what's happening,
exactly?
304
00:20:53,820 --> 00:20:57,388
- Nothing.
- What?
305
00:20:57,390 --> 00:20:59,690
I'm being held at
gunpoint by a pirate.
306
00:20:59,692 --> 00:21:01,359
I'm in the bathroom.
What do you think, Francie?
307
00:21:01,361 --> 00:21:04,028
All right. Sorry
for fuckin' askin'!
308
00:21:04,030 --> 00:21:06,831
I ain't leavin'
without the 30 grand.
309
00:21:06,833 --> 00:21:11,736
Sorry, Sinbad, but I don't think
that musketoon's gonna even fire.
310
00:21:11,738 --> 00:21:15,339
So go ahead and pull the trigger
'cause I got no painting,
311
00:21:15,341 --> 00:21:19,277
no Nicky and
no 30 fucking grand!
312
00:21:23,715 --> 00:21:25,616
Who owns that
fuckin' bike outside?
313
00:21:25,618 --> 00:21:27,051
Wait a minute, man.
314
00:21:36,295 --> 00:21:40,398
- What the fuck?
- What's going on?
315
00:21:40,400 --> 00:21:43,401
- Nicky's back.
- What?
316
00:21:43,403 --> 00:21:44,835
And so am I.
317
00:21:44,837 --> 00:21:47,938
What the fuck just happened?
318
00:21:47,940 --> 00:21:52,310
Fate! Fate is
what just happened.
319
00:21:52,312 --> 00:21:53,978
Uncle Paddy.
320
00:21:53,980 --> 00:21:56,547
How are you, lad?
Still in the land of the living?
321
00:21:56,549 --> 00:21:59,517
You wanted to know when I was
ready to go back to work.
322
00:21:59,519 --> 00:22:01,485
Well, I'm ready.
323
00:22:05,791 --> 00:22:07,692
- Citizenship?
- Various.
324
00:22:07,694 --> 00:22:09,026
Anything to declare?
325
00:22:09,028 --> 00:22:12,596
Nothing but my undying
love for you, beautiful.
326
00:22:14,766 --> 00:22:15,933
Pull over.
327
00:22:21,773 --> 00:22:23,674
Hey, Paddy?
328
00:22:34,553 --> 00:22:35,820
What's that?
329
00:22:35,822 --> 00:22:37,688
A Seurat.
330
00:22:37,690 --> 00:22:41,592
If this is even close to real,
Paddy's gonna make a bundle.
331
00:22:41,594 --> 00:22:44,428
Oh, it's real.
332
00:22:44,430 --> 00:22:47,898
I was hoping to get Paddy
to move it for me.
333
00:22:52,804 --> 00:22:54,004
Oh, hi. I'm Nicky...
334
00:22:54,006 --> 00:22:55,639
I know.
335
00:22:55,641 --> 00:22:57,875
Right.
336
00:22:57,877 --> 00:23:03,514
Well, could you be so kind as to give me
and my brother a moment here to catch up?
337
00:23:12,491 --> 00:23:14,091
So.
338
00:23:14,093 --> 00:23:18,462
How'd you get the scar?
Motorbike?
339
00:23:20,065 --> 00:23:21,899
No.
340
00:23:21,901 --> 00:23:23,601
All right, man.
341
00:23:35,113 --> 00:23:37,748
You must be Francie, are ya?
342
00:23:37,750 --> 00:23:40,684
Paddy McCarthy.
But for you, it's Uncle Paddy.
343
00:23:40,686 --> 00:23:43,246
So, is there a donnybrook a-brewin'
in there? How she gettin' on?
344
00:23:45,191 --> 00:23:47,958
I understood the word "Francie".
345
00:23:47,960 --> 00:23:50,961
Fightin', are they? Ha.
So much alike those two.
346
00:23:50,963 --> 00:23:52,797
They're literally nothing alike.
347
00:23:52,799 --> 00:23:54,732
Oh, different mothers.
348
00:23:54,734 --> 00:23:56,567
They grew up on different
sides of the country.
349
00:23:56,569 --> 00:23:59,170
Their father was the
Johnny Appleseed of sperm.
350
00:23:59,172 --> 00:24:01,005
That's revolting.
351
00:24:01,007 --> 00:24:04,542
You're gettin' old, Crunch.
352
00:24:04,544 --> 00:24:06,811
You never used to be that easy.
353
00:24:06,813 --> 00:24:10,448
Look, if it's an apology you
need to put this thing to bed...
354
00:24:10,450 --> 00:24:13,551
An apology? You sent me
to prison, man.
355
00:24:13,553 --> 00:24:15,186
Exactly. I owe you one.
356
00:24:15,188 --> 00:24:18,823
No. You owe me
five and a half.
357
00:24:18,825 --> 00:24:22,193
But right now,
I just wanna go back to work.
358
00:24:22,195 --> 00:24:24,228
Let's do that, then.
Let's go back to work.
359
00:24:24,230 --> 00:24:26,964
I mean, I practically
apologized here.
360
00:24:26,966 --> 00:24:29,600
You boys done fistin'
in to one another?
361
00:24:29,602 --> 00:24:33,070
Ah, man. I wish you wouldn't
use that turn of phrase.
362
00:24:33,072 --> 00:24:34,772
So, can we get down to work now?
363
00:24:34,774 --> 00:24:37,107
No, Paddy. I'm not gonna help
Nicky fence that painting.
364
00:24:37,109 --> 00:24:38,943
This has nothin' to do
with Nicky's paintin'.
365
00:24:38,945 --> 00:24:41,178
And, by the way, Dennis,
he is your brother
366
00:24:41,180 --> 00:24:42,908
and one day you're gonna
have to forgive him.
367
00:24:42,934 --> 00:24:44,148
Please don't call me Dennis.
368
00:24:44,150 --> 00:24:47,117
And, Nicky Boy, you're gonna pay the
piper for what ya did to Dennis.
369
00:24:47,119 --> 00:24:50,054
- I'll see to it meself.
- I want to pay the piper.
370
00:24:50,056 --> 00:24:52,490
Still not workin'
with Nicky, Paddy.
371
00:24:52,492 --> 00:24:55,059
Oh, just listen to the story
before you say no, lad.
372
00:24:55,061 --> 00:24:56,694
There's a good moral
to this story.
373
00:24:56,696 --> 00:24:58,796
How big a moral are
we talking about here?
374
00:24:58,798 --> 00:25:01,866
One and a half million dollars.
375
00:25:01,868 --> 00:25:04,568
Jesus.
376
00:25:04,570 --> 00:25:08,005
Two weeks ago,
I gets a knock on me door.
377
00:25:12,844 --> 00:25:17,114
Julius Friedman.
You've heard the name.
378
00:25:17,116 --> 00:25:19,950
Just stories.
I've heard stories.
379
00:25:19,952 --> 00:25:22,520
The things in this
man's collection, I mean,
380
00:25:22,522 --> 00:25:27,057
if it were public knowledge, it'd close
the books on a hundred major art thefts.
381
00:25:28,593 --> 00:25:31,295
Believe me, I've seen it.
382
00:25:31,297 --> 00:25:35,266
So then Friedman asked me if I've
ever heard of the Gutenberg Bible.
383
00:25:36,054 --> 00:25:39,069
Gutenberg invents
the printing press in 1440.
384
00:25:39,071 --> 00:25:41,672
It changes everything.
385
00:25:41,674 --> 00:25:44,942
The first book he printed
was the Gutenberg Bible,
386
00:25:44,944 --> 00:25:46,877
the Mona Lisa of books.
387
00:25:46,879 --> 00:25:49,713
The most valuable
book in the world.
388
00:25:49,715 --> 00:25:51,248
Whoa, whoa, whoa,
whoa. Back that shit up.
389
00:25:51,250 --> 00:25:53,284
We can't steal
a Gutenberg Bible.
390
00:25:53,286 --> 00:25:55,953
We're not stealing
the Gutenberg Bible.
391
00:25:55,955 --> 00:26:00,558
The second book Gutenberg printed was
well outside the beliefs of the Church.
392
00:26:00,560 --> 00:26:04,995
The Gospel According to James.
Well, that's a legend.
393
00:26:04,997 --> 00:26:06,997
The church has been
trying to bury this gospel
394
00:26:06,999 --> 00:26:09,567
since before the time
of Constantine.
395
00:26:09,569 --> 00:26:13,203
And, to Friedman, that makes
the Gospel According to Jimmy
396
00:26:13,205 --> 00:26:14,738
even more priceless.
397
00:26:14,740 --> 00:26:17,675
So we nick your fancy book,
398
00:26:17,677 --> 00:26:21,145
hand it on over,
and make scads of loot.
399
00:26:21,147 --> 00:26:23,314
But the thing is,
400
00:26:23,316 --> 00:26:25,916
it's already been stolen.
401
00:26:28,086 --> 00:26:32,189
So last month at the Vanderloos
Gallery in Amsterdam,
402
00:26:32,191 --> 00:26:37,094
our man almost gets nabbed by a cop
who sees him crawlin' out the window.
403
00:26:38,763 --> 00:26:41,332
So how is it I've not heard
that such a fancy,
404
00:26:41,334 --> 00:26:43,334
famous book
as yours was nicked?
405
00:26:43,336 --> 00:26:45,269
No one knows it's stolen.
406
00:26:45,271 --> 00:26:48,172
We swapped it out for a fake.
407
00:26:48,174 --> 00:26:53,611
No one's gonna know it's
missing... until Saturday.
408
00:26:53,613 --> 00:26:55,980
Now, here's
where we come in.
409
00:26:55,982 --> 00:26:58,782
They flew the book from
Europe to Canada.
410
00:26:58,784 --> 00:27:02,252
Since 9/11 you can't fly
anythin' into America anymore.
411
00:27:02,254 --> 00:27:06,190
It was supposed to go from Montreal
to Detroit, crossin' through here.
412
00:27:06,192 --> 00:27:08,872
But the driver got greedy
and tried to smuggle
413
00:27:08,898 --> 00:27:11,095
a brick of hash along
with the Gospel.
414
00:27:11,097 --> 00:27:14,264
So they arrest our man,
put the Gospel in storage
415
00:27:14,266 --> 00:27:17,167
and have an expert coming
in on Saturday.
416
00:27:17,169 --> 00:27:21,972
But any expert's gonna look at that Gospel
and know it's the Guttenberg original.
417
00:27:21,974 --> 00:27:24,241
Which means the Gospel
According to James
418
00:27:24,243 --> 00:27:27,778
is gonna be put under so many
locks and so many keys
419
00:27:27,780 --> 00:27:33,150
that Julius Friedman will never
catch a whiff of it again.
420
00:27:34,986 --> 00:27:37,688
We get the Bible,
we take it to Detroit.
421
00:27:37,690 --> 00:27:39,957
We collect one and a half
million dollars.
422
00:27:39,959 --> 00:27:42,726
And that, laddiekins, is that.
423
00:27:48,099 --> 00:27:50,067
Well, you're shittin' me, right?
424
00:27:50,069 --> 00:27:53,971
First off, I ain't ever heard of
this Gospel According to Jimmy.
425
00:27:53,973 --> 00:27:59,243
And number two, we're not equipped to
rob an international border station.
426
00:27:59,245 --> 00:28:03,847
Look! There's guards.
There's cameras everywhere.
427
00:28:03,849 --> 00:28:07,117
This would take, like, months of planning
and skill sets we just don't possess!
428
00:28:07,119 --> 00:28:10,020
Forget it! We're not
the A-Team here, guys.
429
00:28:10,022 --> 00:28:13,424
I'd peg us at a D-minus
for this kind of thing.
430
00:28:15,260 --> 00:28:16,960
I thought you had something,
Paddy.
431
00:28:18,096 --> 00:28:20,397
- I'm out.
- Hey, Crunch...
432
00:28:20,399 --> 00:28:23,000
- Leave him, lad.
- I got him.
433
00:28:23,002 --> 00:28:25,302
Let's go, boy.
434
00:28:25,304 --> 00:28:28,839
Sir, I'm telling you,
it's happening.
435
00:28:28,841 --> 00:28:31,175
- What's happening?
- Paddy's here, Nicky's here
436
00:28:31,177 --> 00:28:34,445
and they all just happened to converge
in the city where Crunch lives?
437
00:28:34,447 --> 00:28:36,714
And Crunch, we know he's
desperate for money.
438
00:28:36,716 --> 00:28:38,248
Sir, this is
all about the Seurat.
439
00:28:38,250 --> 00:28:41,218
So I need you to authorize eyes
on every entry point
440
00:28:41,220 --> 00:28:43,220
into the country within
a half a day's travel.
441
00:28:43,222 --> 00:28:46,223
I need a full surveillance kit, I
need manpower and I need a gun.
442
00:28:46,225 --> 00:28:49,118
Look, there's no fuckin' way
you're getting a firearm.
443
00:28:49,144 --> 00:28:49,985
OK. No gun.
444
00:28:51,196 --> 00:28:53,430
Come on! Hold up!
445
00:28:53,432 --> 00:28:55,432
Let's take it down,
you're a little testy.
446
00:28:55,434 --> 00:28:57,768
Yeah, well, jail
will do that to a man.
447
00:28:57,770 --> 00:29:01,205
Let me add that "Polish Prison" isn't
quite as hilarious as it sounds.
448
00:29:01,207 --> 00:29:03,240
Whoa! Pardon me.
449
00:29:03,242 --> 00:29:05,843
I can't believe
you're still doin' that.
450
00:29:05,845 --> 00:29:06,977
- What?
- That.
451
00:29:06,979 --> 00:29:08,846
Eh, keeps me sharp.
452
00:29:08,848 --> 00:29:10,914
Listen...
453
00:29:10,916 --> 00:29:14,785
Bottom line is, I know that
you're hard up for cash.
454
00:29:14,787 --> 00:29:17,254
And let's just say,
hypothetically,
455
00:29:17,256 --> 00:29:20,791
I feel bad and I wanna
make it up to you.
456
00:29:22,327 --> 00:29:23,994
So we do this thing
with Paddy
457
00:29:23,996 --> 00:29:26,497
and I cut you in
for ten percent on my end.
458
00:29:26,499 --> 00:29:30,033
A sort of "Sorry for fucking
you over" money. Huh?
459
00:29:30,035 --> 00:29:32,503
Oh. Hi, little girl.
What's your name?
460
00:29:32,505 --> 00:29:35,773
- Robin.
- Oh yeah? Very cute.
461
00:29:36,841 --> 00:29:40,177
Everything out of
your mouth is nothin'.
462
00:29:40,179 --> 00:29:43,013
- How could you say that?
- Gee, I don't know.
463
00:29:43,015 --> 00:29:46,283
Maybe 'cause you just knocked over a
nine-year-old little Chinese girl.
464
00:29:46,285 --> 00:29:48,485
There's supposed to be
a code, Nicky!
465
00:29:48,487 --> 00:29:51,288
You never prey upon
the virtuous or the poor.
466
00:29:51,290 --> 00:29:53,323
You never put the paycheck
over your honor.
467
00:29:53,325 --> 00:29:55,325
And you never,
ever betray your family!
468
00:29:55,327 --> 00:29:57,961
Sure, maybe it's all
just horseshit
469
00:29:57,963 --> 00:30:00,330
that we feed ourselves
so we can go to sleep at night.
470
00:30:00,332 --> 00:30:02,833
Maybe it's horseshit so that
we can fancy ourselves
471
00:30:02,835 --> 00:30:05,536
a cut above the thugs and
the gangsters of the world.
472
00:30:05,538 --> 00:30:07,538
But I bought into that
horseshit, Nicky!
473
00:30:07,540 --> 00:30:11,074
And you, you just trample
all over that horseshit.
474
00:30:11,076 --> 00:30:14,845
And you just, now you, you got shit
all over your, your boots, you know.
475
00:30:14,847 --> 00:30:17,047
You, you just... you,
you got shitty boots.
476
00:30:17,049 --> 00:30:18,582
Hey, the analogy's
breaking down.
477
00:30:18,584 --> 00:30:20,184
Yeah, maybe a little.
You know what I fuckin' mean.
478
00:30:20,186 --> 00:30:21,451
Hey, what's a fella got to do
479
00:30:21,453 --> 00:30:22,920
to make amends with you?
480
00:30:22,922 --> 00:30:24,188
The only thing I trust about you
481
00:30:24,190 --> 00:30:26,223
is you'll be a greedy,
snaky motherfucker
482
00:30:26,225 --> 00:30:28,492
- the second you see an angle.
- There is no angle.
483
00:30:28,494 --> 00:30:30,294
There's always
an angle with you, man.
484
00:30:30,296 --> 00:30:32,963
You're always hedging,
you're always working it.
485
00:30:32,965 --> 00:30:36,834
You think this is
about money, Crunch?
486
00:30:36,836 --> 00:30:38,569
Well, I got news for you.
487
00:30:40,939 --> 00:30:43,273
Think again.
488
00:30:43,275 --> 00:30:46,310
Gotta be a cheaper
way to do this.
489
00:30:47,545 --> 00:30:49,379
♪ Now tell me, baby
Tell me ♪
490
00:30:49,381 --> 00:30:51,381
♪ What kind Of man are you?
491
00:30:51,383 --> 00:30:55,285
Just because he says he's sorry
doesn't make him a changed man.
492
00:30:55,287 --> 00:30:59,323
Like just 'cause you like being drunk
doesn't make you an alcoholic.
493
00:30:59,325 --> 00:31:00,624
Ah, shit. Lola. Lola.
494
00:31:00,626 --> 00:31:04,394
Babe. Yeah. Hey.
495
00:31:04,396 --> 00:31:07,431
Go. I need
to talk to Crunch.
496
00:31:09,968 --> 00:31:11,435
What are you doin' with him?
497
00:31:11,437 --> 00:31:13,537
Nicky told me you were out.
498
00:31:13,539 --> 00:31:15,572
- Yeah.
- I told him you're back in.
499
00:31:15,574 --> 00:31:17,007
Forget it.
This thing smells.
500
00:31:17,009 --> 00:31:18,942
Crunch! We need the money.
501
00:31:18,944 --> 00:31:21,011
How are we gonna
pay our bills?
502
00:31:21,013 --> 00:31:22,913
Wow! She's good.
503
00:31:22,915 --> 00:31:26,583
Oh. So, so you
made her do this?
504
00:31:26,585 --> 00:31:28,919
No. Crunch needs this.
505
00:31:28,921 --> 00:31:31,121
He needs me.
506
00:31:31,123 --> 00:31:33,957
It's a brother thing.
You wouldn't understand.
507
00:31:33,959 --> 00:31:36,660
Oh. Well, what I
understand is that,
508
00:31:36,662 --> 00:31:40,030
that's my guy and
he doesn't need you.
509
00:31:40,032 --> 00:31:45,135
Well, he needs someone to stop
him from taking dives for $800.
510
00:31:48,406 --> 00:31:50,107
Take care.
511
00:32:01,319 --> 00:32:05,222
All right. I'll do it.
But this one we do my way.
512
00:32:05,224 --> 00:32:07,057
What did ya have in mind?
513
00:32:07,059 --> 00:32:10,394
Well, let's just say things are
gonna get a little loud.
514
00:32:14,466 --> 00:32:16,133
That's where
the motorcycle kicks in.
515
00:32:16,135 --> 00:32:18,936
Simultaneously, Francie
has broken out
516
00:32:18,938 --> 00:32:21,104
of our giant,
ceramic Trojan Horse
517
00:32:21,106 --> 00:32:23,073
with at least three minutes
of oxygen left.
518
00:32:23,075 --> 00:32:25,342
Paddy's taking care of
the guards, after rappelling
519
00:32:25,344 --> 00:32:27,945
through the ceiling and
changing out of his cat suit.
520
00:32:27,947 --> 00:32:30,314
And Nicky's already
dealt with the main gate
521
00:32:30,316 --> 00:32:34,651
using 2.5 pounds
of all-American TNT.
522
00:32:34,653 --> 00:32:37,487
In and out in 4.25 minutes.
523
00:32:37,489 --> 00:32:41,725
This may be the worst idea
in the history of the world.
524
00:32:41,727 --> 00:32:43,560
We just need a computer guy!
525
00:32:43,562 --> 00:32:46,330
Crunch, there is no
computer guy!
526
00:32:46,332 --> 00:32:48,807
There's no dude who can
feed a video loop to make
527
00:32:48,833 --> 00:32:51,034
some security guard think
all is hunky dory,
528
00:32:51,036 --> 00:32:54,638
while burglars in cat suits
rappel from the ceiling.
529
00:32:54,640 --> 00:32:59,376
By the way, I think Uncle Paddy's black
Spandex days are way behind him.
530
00:32:59,378 --> 00:33:02,446
And as for
your Trojan Horse thing,
531
00:33:02,448 --> 00:33:04,748
well, I don't even know
where to begin with that.
532
00:33:04,750 --> 00:33:07,217
I actually thought that
was kind of bad-ass.
533
00:33:07,219 --> 00:33:09,019
Pardon me, you are who?
534
00:33:09,021 --> 00:33:10,053
He's my apprentice.
535
00:33:10,055 --> 00:33:13,056
Oh. So you're a wizard now?
536
00:33:13,058 --> 00:33:15,025
Ah, fuck you, Nicky.
537
00:33:15,027 --> 00:33:18,061
Look, the Reverend's got
somebody on the inside.
538
00:33:18,063 --> 00:33:21,098
And we need to find out
who that is. Uncle Paddy,
539
00:33:21,100 --> 00:33:23,633
I want you to call the Reverend
and get us a name.
540
00:33:41,085 --> 00:33:42,619
Call me Ponch.
541
00:33:42,621 --> 00:33:45,389
I'm Nicky. Paddy.
Francie. Crunch.
542
00:33:45,391 --> 00:33:49,192
Those are some shitty aliases.
Y'all sound like chocolate bars.
543
00:33:49,194 --> 00:33:52,329
Where's Twix?
544
00:33:52,331 --> 00:33:56,767
Oh, wait. Crunch Calhoun?
545
00:33:56,769 --> 00:33:59,569
No! Dude.
546
00:33:59,571 --> 00:34:04,374
I once saw you almost jump six
cars in Buffalo. Changed my life.
547
00:34:04,376 --> 00:34:07,077
Listen, the Reverend said that you
could help us out for 10,000.
548
00:34:07,079 --> 00:34:09,735
Tempting, but not a chance. No.
I told the Reverend everything
549
00:34:09,761 --> 00:34:10,747
I know for twice that.
550
00:34:10,749 --> 00:34:14,084
And I got so sick from nerves I
didn't eat, shit or sleep for a week.
551
00:34:14,086 --> 00:34:15,118
I'm not your guy.
552
00:34:15,120 --> 00:34:17,654
If you were our guy.
553
00:34:18,823 --> 00:34:21,191
If I were your guy, I'd go about
forgetting it.
554
00:34:21,193 --> 00:34:25,095
There's 12 cameras, 12 of them.
That's one dozen cameras.
555
00:34:25,097 --> 00:34:27,531
- Any in the storage room?
- No, but everywhere else.
556
00:34:27,533 --> 00:34:31,301
Three guards, backup generator.
It's impossible.
557
00:34:31,303 --> 00:34:33,203
I don't accept that.
558
00:34:33,205 --> 00:34:35,172
Well, accept it, Snickers.
559
00:34:35,174 --> 00:34:37,240
There's always a way.
560
00:34:37,242 --> 00:34:40,343
All right, look.
561
00:34:40,345 --> 00:34:42,345
I'll tell you what I told
the Reverend, OK?
562
00:34:42,347 --> 00:34:44,815
That we called an expert.
She comes in Saturday at 10.
563
00:34:44,817 --> 00:34:46,817
Don't call me again.
564
00:34:46,819 --> 00:34:49,619
You said, "She".
Who's the "she"?
565
00:34:49,621 --> 00:34:52,255
- Who?
- The expert.
566
00:34:52,257 --> 00:34:54,524
Olga Something-Long.
567
00:34:54,526 --> 00:34:57,527
Olga Something-Long?
568
00:34:57,529 --> 00:35:01,832
Olga Panofsky-Cienfuegos?
569
00:35:01,834 --> 00:35:03,733
Something like that.
570
00:35:07,105 --> 00:35:08,472
Later, Crunch.
571
00:35:10,174 --> 00:35:13,477
Wait, why... Who's,
who's Olga Something-Long?
572
00:35:13,479 --> 00:35:14,845
A badly burnt bridge.
573
00:35:14,847 --> 00:35:16,880
Oh, she was intoxicating.
574
00:35:16,882 --> 00:35:20,183
Thanks to Uncle Fucks-A-Lot, there's
no way we can get near her.
575
00:35:20,185 --> 00:35:21,318
Wait. Why not?
576
00:35:21,320 --> 00:35:23,353
Old Sloppy Balls McCarthy here
577
00:35:23,355 --> 00:35:25,222
slept with her and then
slept with her sister.
578
00:35:25,224 --> 00:35:27,357
She was intoxicating too.
579
00:35:27,359 --> 00:35:30,861
It's too bad. Olga would've
helped out for a little cash.
580
00:35:30,863 --> 00:35:32,262
She wasn't exactly a nun.
581
00:35:32,264 --> 00:35:34,364
No, she certainly was not.
582
00:35:34,366 --> 00:35:36,266
There's gotta be like,
what, ten experts
583
00:35:36,268 --> 00:35:38,435
in the whole country
they could've called.
584
00:35:38,437 --> 00:35:41,139
Paddy probably balled half of them.
Let it go.
585
00:35:41,165 --> 00:35:42,806
There's always another way.
586
00:35:42,808 --> 00:35:46,676
Can we please stop
talking about old people fucking?
587
00:35:51,183 --> 00:35:54,618
OK. I got the plan.
588
00:35:54,620 --> 00:35:57,754
No. You've got "a plan."
589
00:35:57,756 --> 00:35:59,789
This ain't a dictatorship,
Nicky.
590
00:35:59,791 --> 00:36:01,591
We need a forger.
Let's call Dirty Ernie.
591
00:36:01,593 --> 00:36:06,296
Dirty Ernie? No, if we
need a forger we call Guy.
592
00:36:06,298 --> 00:36:07,831
What time is it in France?
593
00:36:14,206 --> 00:36:16,706
- Hello?
- Yeah, Guy, it's Nicky.
594
00:36:18,609 --> 00:36:20,343
I do not know you, Nicky.
595
00:36:20,345 --> 00:36:22,279
The son-of-a-bitch
hung up on me.
596
00:36:22,281 --> 00:36:23,914
Here. Come on.
597
00:36:26,617 --> 00:36:29,553
- Hello?
- Hey, Guy.
598
00:36:29,555 --> 00:36:32,822
Hey, Crunch!
599
00:36:32,824 --> 00:36:35,625
Wow, no. Sorry. I just used up
the totality of my French there.
600
00:36:35,627 --> 00:36:39,729
It's OK. When you speak French,
it's like a donkey cock right in my ear.
601
00:36:39,731 --> 00:36:43,767
I'm on Paddy's phone so I'm gonna keep
it short. How ya fixed for work?
602
00:36:43,769 --> 00:36:46,469
You are working? With Paddy?
603
00:36:46,471 --> 00:36:48,939
- Yeah.
- With Nicky?
604
00:36:48,941 --> 00:36:50,907
Listen, I'll explain it all
to you if you come over here.
605
00:36:50,909 --> 00:36:54,878
- To America? Absolument.
- Not exactly America. Canada.
606
00:36:54,880 --> 00:36:56,713
Hm. America Light.
607
00:37:06,525 --> 00:37:08,592
OK, you want to throw
things? Throw things, OK!
608
00:37:08,594 --> 00:37:10,627
I don't give a shit! Motherfuck!
609
00:37:10,629 --> 00:37:13,330
OK. OK. No, be careful with
that. No, don't do that, OK?
610
00:37:13,332 --> 00:37:15,665
I want to see the piece of paper
that says you can go through that!
611
00:37:15,667 --> 00:37:17,400
No, don't touch it.
That is $2,000...
612
00:37:17,402 --> 00:37:21,871
He's clean. First Nicky,
then Paddy, now Guy.
613
00:37:21,873 --> 00:37:24,374
- I'm telling you, something's up.
- This is bullshit!
614
00:37:24,376 --> 00:37:27,310
- And you know it and you know it!
- I thought we had a 10-32.
615
00:37:27,312 --> 00:37:32,449
Ten thirty-two? You trying
to impress me with numbers?
616
00:37:32,451 --> 00:37:37,354
I'll give you an
impressive number: 52.
617
00:37:37,356 --> 00:37:40,457
That's the number of millions
they said I stole.
618
00:37:40,459 --> 00:37:42,926
I got a number for you: one,
619
00:37:42,928 --> 00:37:45,328
as in you help me land this one
and you're out.
620
00:37:45,330 --> 00:37:46,496
On the lives of my kids.
621
00:37:46,498 --> 00:37:47,697
I've seen your kids.
622
00:37:47,699 --> 00:37:49,266
You'd be better off
without them.
623
00:37:49,268 --> 00:37:50,333
You're a cunt.
624
00:37:50,335 --> 00:37:51,801
You wouldn't know a vagina
625
00:37:51,803 --> 00:37:54,471
if it was four foot tall
and staring you in the face.
626
00:37:54,473 --> 00:37:57,040
I'm gonna punch you
in the fucking...
627
00:37:59,810 --> 00:38:02,679
- Aw, shit. Interpol.
- Interpol?!
628
00:38:02,681 --> 00:38:04,547
No, no, no. Don't look.
629
00:38:06,684 --> 00:38:07,951
There's no way
that's a coincidence.
630
00:38:07,953 --> 00:38:09,686
That can't be a coincidence.
631
00:38:09,688 --> 00:38:11,588
What do we do?
What's the play?
632
00:38:11,590 --> 00:38:13,390
- I'll talk to him.
- No.
633
00:38:13,392 --> 00:38:14,724
He'll talk to me.
He won't talk to you.
634
00:38:14,726 --> 00:38:15,725
I said no!
635
00:38:15,727 --> 00:38:18,028
Interpol's a real thing?
636
00:38:18,030 --> 00:38:21,398
I'm not going to cut
my fuckin' leg off.
637
00:38:21,400 --> 00:38:23,066
- Five minutes.
- Get outta here, Francie.
638
00:38:23,068 --> 00:38:24,868
- Crunch... Yeah, OK.
- Now.
639
00:38:30,007 --> 00:38:33,043
- Crunch.
- Sam?
640
00:38:34,712 --> 00:38:38,481
Men of our vintage
should be retired.
641
00:38:40,718 --> 00:38:42,852
You know, when I heard you were
working for the other side,
642
00:38:42,854 --> 00:38:46,356
I just couldn't believe it.
643
00:38:46,358 --> 00:38:49,092
At least tell me they don't
make you wear a wire.
644
00:38:49,094 --> 00:38:52,095
No. They don't make me
wear a wire.
645
00:38:52,097 --> 00:38:56,599
And I get to see
some fine art.
646
00:38:56,601 --> 00:39:00,937
So... what do you think they're
talking about down there?
647
00:39:02,506 --> 00:39:04,874
Still about the art, huh?
648
00:39:04,876 --> 00:39:06,810
My mother got me into it.
649
00:39:06,812 --> 00:39:11,715
We were always hard up,
but she did her best.
650
00:39:11,717 --> 00:39:14,484
Worked as a barmaid
between kids.
651
00:39:16,454 --> 00:39:18,121
When I was ten or 11,
652
00:39:18,123 --> 00:39:22,392
she took me to
the V and A in London.
653
00:39:23,494 --> 00:39:26,129
And I saw an object
that blew my mind.
654
00:39:27,732 --> 00:39:32,902
It was a drinking cup fashioned
from a single piece of jade.
655
00:39:32,904 --> 00:39:37,874
It was just a cup,
but it was perfect.
656
00:39:37,876 --> 00:39:41,544
And it made me look at
everything differently.
657
00:39:41,546 --> 00:39:46,816
Turner, Monet, Vermeer,
those guys kept my eyes open.
658
00:39:46,818 --> 00:39:48,685
It was a feeling I had,
659
00:39:48,687 --> 00:39:52,155
a completeness when
art touched me.
660
00:39:54,158 --> 00:39:59,529
I only started getting into trouble
when I wanted to possess it.
661
00:40:00,798 --> 00:40:05,101
And you...
what makes you do it?
662
00:40:05,103 --> 00:40:06,503
Money.
663
00:40:06,505 --> 00:40:09,639
Well, at least you're honest.
664
00:40:09,641 --> 00:40:12,542
It's always nice to know...
665
00:40:13,544 --> 00:40:15,912
who you can trust.
666
00:40:15,914 --> 00:40:18,415
I'm gonna find this painting.
667
00:40:18,417 --> 00:40:22,786
Not because I want to get
you or your brother in trouble.
668
00:40:22,788 --> 00:40:25,989
I just want to hold it.
669
00:40:29,693 --> 00:40:32,429
Let me ask you a question.
670
00:40:32,431 --> 00:40:34,464
You ever seen the inside
of Sing-Sing?
671
00:40:34,466 --> 00:40:37,066
- I haven't.
- 'Cause I know a lot of guys
672
00:40:37,068 --> 00:40:40,103
who would like to
fuck you inside there.
673
00:40:41,872 --> 00:40:44,073
Are you hitting on me?
674
00:40:46,210 --> 00:40:47,844
I will...
675
00:40:47,846 --> 00:40:49,446
Fuck!
676
00:40:49,448 --> 00:40:52,081
It's been a breath of fresh air.
677
00:40:52,083 --> 00:40:54,150
Looking good, Sam.
678
00:40:59,623 --> 00:41:01,724
Interpol? Fucking Interpol?!
679
00:41:01,726 --> 00:41:04,961
I'm not going to fuckin' prison!
I'm not cut out for that shit!
680
00:41:04,963 --> 00:41:06,863
You see these fuckin' arms,
man?
681
00:41:06,865 --> 00:41:10,200
These wet noodles will prevent
very few prison rapes.
682
00:41:10,202 --> 00:41:12,535
Francie, I promise
you on my mother's eyes,
683
00:41:12,537 --> 00:41:14,938
- you're gonna be fine.
- You don't know that.
684
00:41:14,940 --> 00:41:19,476
You gotta trust me. Look, ever
since I've been back,
685
00:41:19,478 --> 00:41:23,079
you've been there for me
like nobody else.
686
00:41:23,081 --> 00:41:28,551
Now... I might have to
toss in the "f" word here
687
00:41:28,553 --> 00:41:32,255
to make this a bit easier but...
I fuckin' love you, man.
688
00:41:32,257 --> 00:41:34,791
OK, my turn.
689
00:41:36,060 --> 00:41:37,627
That has to be Guy.
690
00:41:40,065 --> 00:41:42,832
All right, Guy just landed
and we got a little problem.
691
00:41:42,834 --> 00:41:46,202
- Interpol.
- All right. Well, we'll adapt.
692
00:41:46,204 --> 00:41:48,238
OK?
693
00:41:51,775 --> 00:41:54,544
So?
694
00:41:54,546 --> 00:41:57,780
I'm curious to know what kind
of game you're running?
695
00:41:57,782 --> 00:42:00,817
I was curious about your game.
696
00:42:00,819 --> 00:42:04,621
We need to get on the same page.
697
00:42:04,623 --> 00:42:06,789
What do we do first?
698
00:42:06,791 --> 00:42:09,292
- First, we're gonna need a fake.
- How good must it look?
699
00:42:09,294 --> 00:42:11,027
Good enough to fool the eye.
700
00:42:12,062 --> 00:42:13,162
Identical on the outside,
701
00:42:13,164 --> 00:42:15,632
inside doesn't matter.
702
00:42:15,634 --> 00:42:18,067
You've got four days.
703
00:42:18,069 --> 00:42:22,705
Crunch, I'm sorry for making fun of your
Trojan Horse idea because it actually plays.
704
00:42:22,707 --> 00:42:25,708
We're gonna hide that fake
in a Trojan Horse of our own.
705
00:42:25,710 --> 00:42:26,943
Something that draws attention.
706
00:42:26,945 --> 00:42:29,012
Paddy, see what you can
come up with.
707
00:42:29,014 --> 00:42:31,881
I got the perfect thing in mind.
708
00:42:31,883 --> 00:42:33,750
I don't know,
what do you think?
709
00:42:33,752 --> 00:42:36,953
It makes me feel...
710
00:42:36,955 --> 00:42:40,256
safe and scared.
711
00:42:41,325 --> 00:42:43,226
Mostly scared.
712
00:42:43,228 --> 00:42:46,963
It's weird. It's
like it follows you.
713
00:42:47,965 --> 00:42:50,833
First, you caress.
714
00:42:50,835 --> 00:42:54,137
Too rough, she cracks.
715
00:42:54,139 --> 00:42:57,173
Too soft, she will not
succumb to the touch.
716
00:42:57,175 --> 00:43:03,112
Just right. It's you. Ahh.
717
00:43:04,715 --> 00:43:06,849
Then we need to get our horse
into their corral.
718
00:43:06,851 --> 00:43:08,685
But, how?
719
00:43:08,687 --> 00:43:11,154
You say this border station,
they inspect everything.
720
00:43:11,156 --> 00:43:14,190
Exactly. Everything going in,
everything going out.
721
00:43:14,192 --> 00:43:17,293
We can't walk in our fake
or walk out our original.
722
00:43:17,295 --> 00:43:20,863
So we're gonna get them
to take it in for us.
723
00:43:20,865 --> 00:43:25,902
We're going to use our sullied
reputation to our advantage for once.
724
00:43:28,105 --> 00:43:31,841
- Crunch sets off the bells and whistles.
725
00:43:31,843 --> 00:43:35,612
There's a standard 30-day
impound on undocumented art.
726
00:43:35,614 --> 00:43:38,348
And, because it's Crunch,
convicted art thief,
727
00:43:38,350 --> 00:43:41,351
transporting art without
the proper paperwork,
728
00:43:41,353 --> 00:43:44,387
they're gonna call the gallery
where it was purchased right away,
729
00:43:44,389 --> 00:43:46,689
to make sure
that it's not stolen.
730
00:43:46,691 --> 00:43:49,092
But it ain't goin' anywhere
until Crunch shows up
731
00:43:49,094 --> 00:43:51,794
with the proof of ownership,
which we've got.
732
00:43:51,796 --> 00:43:54,163
And we know
where it's being kept.
733
00:43:54,165 --> 00:43:56,132
The toad is in the hole.
734
00:43:56,134 --> 00:43:57,900
What the fuck
are you talking about?
735
00:43:57,902 --> 00:44:01,204
The fuckin' huge vagina is
in the border station now.
736
00:44:01,206 --> 00:44:02,939
Because of Crunch's record,
737
00:44:02,941 --> 00:44:04,974
Interpol will be brought in.
738
00:44:04,976 --> 00:44:08,778
But, since no crime has been
committed, they can't touch us.
739
00:44:08,780 --> 00:44:11,014
What the hell
am I looking at?
740
00:44:11,016 --> 00:44:14,250
It's four foot high and
staring you in the face.
741
00:44:14,252 --> 00:44:16,853
And on the day,
what about Interpol?
742
00:44:16,855 --> 00:44:19,255
They're going to be watching us,
which we need to fix.
743
00:44:19,257 --> 00:44:23,760
Francie and I will distract them while the
switch goes down at the border station.
744
00:44:23,762 --> 00:44:27,730
But most important thing is we've
gotta deal with Olga Something-Long.
745
00:44:27,732 --> 00:44:29,298
Paddy?
746
00:44:29,300 --> 00:44:31,300
Well, that'll be something hard.
747
00:44:31,302 --> 00:44:34,370
Things between Olga and me
are rough as a bear's arse.
748
00:44:34,372 --> 00:44:35,938
She's got to miss
that appointment.
749
00:44:35,940 --> 00:44:38,374
But, more importantly,
is we need those forms.
750
00:44:38,376 --> 00:44:41,978
- No paperwork, no access.
- I'll start tomorrow.
751
00:44:49,386 --> 00:44:51,120
Olga, darlin'.
752
00:44:51,122 --> 00:44:53,456
Oh, no.
753
00:44:53,458 --> 00:44:56,025
No, no, no, no,
you don't get to do this.
754
00:44:57,027 --> 00:44:59,195
It took me years to forget.
755
00:44:59,197 --> 00:45:02,832
You are dead to me.
You are dead!
756
00:45:02,834 --> 00:45:04,434
I'm not asking
for forgiveness.
757
00:45:04,436 --> 00:45:06,969
God can forgive me,
that's his job.
758
00:45:06,971 --> 00:45:09,405
You have no control over me.
759
00:45:09,407 --> 00:45:11,007
We should never be together.
760
00:45:11,009 --> 00:45:12,909
I hate you.
761
00:45:12,911 --> 00:45:16,312
You crushed me heart
and you stained me soul.
762
00:45:16,314 --> 00:45:18,314
Fuck you.
763
00:45:18,316 --> 00:45:21,217
No, darlin'.
764
00:45:23,053 --> 00:45:25,455
Fuck you.
765
00:45:34,098 --> 00:45:35,932
Are we ready to do this?
766
00:45:41,138 --> 00:45:42,505
Let's roll!
767
00:45:43,507 --> 00:45:46,375
Just, uh, try to act natural.
768
00:45:46,377 --> 00:45:49,045
Yeah. I, I don't
know what that means.
769
00:45:49,047 --> 00:45:51,748
What do we have here?
770
00:45:53,117 --> 00:45:57,220
Two perps, one box, red.
771
00:45:57,222 --> 00:45:59,322
I betcha there's
something in that.
772
00:46:01,925 --> 00:46:03,893
Here we go.
They're on the move.
773
00:46:03,895 --> 00:46:06,763
Thank you.
I needed to know that.
774
00:46:06,765 --> 00:46:10,466
Please continue to point out the
obvious to me as it comes up.
775
00:46:10,468 --> 00:46:13,402
- You're starting the car.
- OK. That's enough.
776
00:46:13,404 --> 00:46:14,837
You're putting
the car into gear.
777
00:46:14,839 --> 00:46:17,373
I so very much want to stab you
778
00:46:17,375 --> 00:46:19,142
in the face and throat.
779
00:46:19,144 --> 00:46:21,544
With your magic pen, no doubt.
780
00:46:28,519 --> 00:46:30,186
Saturday, ten AM.
781
00:46:30,188 --> 00:46:32,889
Guy walks into
the border station.
782
00:46:32,891 --> 00:46:34,323
And, man, will you
please wear a suit?
783
00:46:34,325 --> 00:46:36,959
No offense, but you look
like a slutty elf.
784
00:46:36,961 --> 00:46:40,863
What... is "elf"?
785
00:46:40,865 --> 00:46:44,167
The station gets
a call the day before
786
00:46:44,169 --> 00:46:46,235
from a woman
they think is Olga.
787
00:46:46,237 --> 00:46:48,437
I cannot make it,
but my colleague, Philippe,
788
00:46:48,439 --> 00:46:50,840
- he should be there.
- Hello.
789
00:46:50,842 --> 00:46:54,410
Oh. I think I chipped a tooth.
790
00:47:05,222 --> 00:47:08,257
Olga gets a call
the day before from a man
791
00:47:08,259 --> 00:47:09,892
she thinks is
from the border.
792
00:47:09,894 --> 00:47:13,296
So, while we'll not be
requiring your services,
793
00:47:13,298 --> 00:47:16,032
we will, of course, still pay.
794
00:47:31,515 --> 00:47:32,548
Yeah, where're we at?
795
00:47:32,550 --> 00:47:34,016
I got Guy on the other line.
796
00:47:34,018 --> 00:47:36,219
OK, I'm in. How
will I know where it is?
797
00:47:36,221 --> 00:47:38,387
It's pink and
three feet tall.
798
00:47:38,389 --> 00:47:40,356
You're a Frenchman,
you'll find it.
799
00:47:47,898 --> 00:47:51,167
Like Ponch said, with no
security cameras in the room,
800
00:47:51,169 --> 00:47:54,003
Guy can make the switch.
801
00:47:54,005 --> 00:47:56,205
All right.
We got an hour to go.
802
00:47:56,207 --> 00:47:59,976
- Did you get the nylons?
- I did indeed.
803
00:47:59,978 --> 00:48:02,445
- One?
- Well, it says one pair.
804
00:48:02,447 --> 00:48:05,214
- One pair? Like a pair of pants.
- Yeah.
805
00:48:05,216 --> 00:48:07,450
Well, I'm sorry,
Mr. Condescending,
806
00:48:07,452 --> 00:48:09,185
I don't buy a whole lot
of fuckin' pantyhose.
807
00:48:09,187 --> 00:48:11,020
- Fishnets?
- Yes.
808
00:48:11,022 --> 00:48:12,188
Put these over our heads
809
00:48:12,190 --> 00:48:13,590
we'll look like
a couple of waffles.
810
00:48:40,450 --> 00:48:42,652
This is just great.
811
00:48:42,654 --> 00:48:44,186
OK, let's go.
812
00:48:56,434 --> 00:48:59,135
- Yeah?
- Finished.
813
00:48:59,137 --> 00:49:01,637
All right,
Crunch, you're up.
814
00:49:14,351 --> 00:49:18,621
No. Something's not right.
815
00:49:21,491 --> 00:49:23,092
OK, here we go.
816
00:49:23,094 --> 00:49:24,593
What are you doing?
817
00:49:24,595 --> 00:49:26,429
This is usually how it works.
818
00:49:26,431 --> 00:49:28,965
Perps go on the move,
cops get moving.
819
00:49:28,967 --> 00:49:32,034
A little pro tip for you:
"perps", short for perpetrators.
820
00:49:32,036 --> 00:49:36,472
Just trust me for a second.
Don't switch the engine on.
821
00:49:42,279 --> 00:49:43,713
Seriously,
what are we doing?
822
00:49:43,715 --> 00:49:45,381
Why do I listen to you?
823
00:49:46,516 --> 00:49:48,484
You're being distracted.
824
00:49:48,486 --> 00:49:52,021
Like at the Quebec airport.
825
00:49:56,493 --> 00:49:59,095
The border.
They're at the border.
826
00:50:09,539 --> 00:50:11,440
They stopped following us.
827
00:50:22,352 --> 00:50:25,621
Pick up. Come on, pick up.
828
00:50:29,459 --> 00:50:31,527
Two minutes away.
Come on!
829
00:50:32,496 --> 00:50:33,696
Whoo!
830
00:50:51,481 --> 00:50:53,082
I'm clear.
831
00:51:01,324 --> 00:51:03,559
♪ Stand up
832
00:51:03,561 --> 00:51:07,296
I'm trying to,
I'm trying to. This is what I...
833
00:51:07,298 --> 00:51:11,100
Hey! Hey! Here we go.
Here we go.
834
00:51:14,304 --> 00:51:15,704
Whoo!
835
00:51:17,407 --> 00:51:19,642
Atta boy, Crunch!
836
00:51:22,180 --> 00:51:24,747
All right, just like
the old days.
837
00:51:24,749 --> 00:51:27,450
Yeah, the old days
were you threw me to the cops?
838
00:51:27,452 --> 00:51:29,752
Or the old days where a one-eyed
pirate steals my bike?
839
00:51:29,754 --> 00:51:33,522
Uh, uh, uh.
Now, now, gentlemen.
840
00:51:33,524 --> 00:51:35,558
Let us drink to James.
841
00:51:35,560 --> 00:51:38,661
- To James!
- To James!
842
00:51:40,530 --> 00:51:43,365
And to Nicky Boy.
One for the ages.
843
00:51:48,672 --> 00:51:51,841
- Now you take a bow, Guy.
- Moi?
844
00:51:51,843 --> 00:51:55,644
Four days to fake
a 500-year-old masterpiece.
845
00:51:55,646 --> 00:51:57,513
Oh, to have your talent, lad.
846
00:51:57,515 --> 00:52:00,649
It was an inspired effort.
I admit.
847
00:52:00,651 --> 00:52:02,785
But I am no Yves Chaudron.
848
00:52:02,787 --> 00:52:06,355
Who's that,
Yeeves Show-row?
849
00:52:06,357 --> 00:52:07,623
Stay, Crunch.
You'll like this.
850
00:52:07,625 --> 00:52:09,225
Nah, I've heard
this tale a time or two.
851
00:52:09,227 --> 00:52:11,293
- I gotta take a piss.
- Come on, Crunch.
852
00:52:11,295 --> 00:52:13,429
Wait. Who's Yves Shmo-boh?
853
00:52:13,431 --> 00:52:15,831
I shall tell you
of Yves Chaudron.
854
00:52:15,833 --> 00:52:18,901
For this is a story
of inspiration.
855
00:52:18,903 --> 00:52:21,604
He was everything
I aspire to be.
856
00:52:21,606 --> 00:52:24,673
A master, a legend.
857
00:52:24,675 --> 00:52:28,744
A man so gifted his work
would make angels cry.
858
00:52:28,746 --> 00:52:34,583
He was the one true talent behind
the greatest art theft in history.
859
00:52:34,585 --> 00:52:38,320
The theft of the Mona Lisa.
860
00:52:39,756 --> 00:52:42,625
The story begins
in Paris, 1911.
861
00:52:42,627 --> 00:52:45,161
Not with Chaudron,
but with an Italian,
862
00:52:45,163 --> 00:52:47,296
a poor carpenter named Perugia
863
00:52:47,298 --> 00:52:49,465
who, a few months
before the theft,
864
00:52:49,467 --> 00:52:51,367
works a contract at the Louvre.
865
00:52:51,369 --> 00:52:55,171
As with any menial job,
he learns many menial things.
866
00:52:55,173 --> 00:52:56,906
Such as where the
entrances and exits are,
867
00:52:56,908 --> 00:52:59,675
the guards' names,
rotations and the like.
868
00:52:59,677 --> 00:53:03,746
Little did he know that this
otherwise useless information
869
00:53:03,748 --> 00:53:06,282
would prove to be
quite important.
870
00:53:06,284 --> 00:53:09,552
For it is when
Perugia's contract ends
871
00:53:09,554 --> 00:53:12,488
that his destiny begins.
872
00:53:12,490 --> 00:53:16,258
Fate taps Perugia
on the shoulder.
873
00:53:16,260 --> 00:53:20,529
Eduardo de Valfierno,
a criminal mastermind.
874
00:53:20,531 --> 00:53:24,833
Valfierno asks Perugia
to steal the Mona Lisa
875
00:53:24,835 --> 00:53:29,371
for $30,000.
It's like a million back then,
876
00:53:29,373 --> 00:53:33,442
an offer a poor carpenter
could never refuse.
877
00:53:33,444 --> 00:53:36,345
The adventure of the theft
is a story in and of itself.
878
00:53:36,347 --> 00:53:39,682
In short, through luck,
cunning, lazy security
879
00:53:39,684 --> 00:53:41,884
and the horrible disadvantage
of being Italian,
880
00:53:41,886 --> 00:53:43,452
he actually succeeds.
881
00:53:43,454 --> 00:53:45,888
The carpenter
steals the Mona Lisa
882
00:53:45,890 --> 00:53:48,958
and the theft makes world news.
883
00:53:52,729 --> 00:53:55,264
As promised,
he produces the Mona Lisa.
884
00:53:55,266 --> 00:53:56,799
Valfierno produces the money.
885
00:53:56,801 --> 00:53:58,834
But he makes a strange request.
886
00:53:58,836 --> 00:54:01,403
He asks him to hold on to her
just a little longer
887
00:54:01,405 --> 00:54:04,306
so he can arrange for
her transit overseas.
888
00:54:04,308 --> 00:54:07,309
Perugia agrees and waits,
889
00:54:07,311 --> 00:54:09,912
and waits and waits.
890
00:54:09,914 --> 00:54:12,481
His story ends here.
891
00:54:12,483 --> 00:54:15,618
And it is now that I tell you
of Yves Chaudron.
892
00:54:15,620 --> 00:54:17,753
Six months before the theft,
893
00:54:17,755 --> 00:54:20,289
Valfierno commissions
Yves Chaudron,
894
00:54:20,291 --> 00:54:21,757
the world's greatest forger,
895
00:54:21,759 --> 00:54:25,027
to reproduce the Mona Lisa
six times and perfect,
896
00:54:25,029 --> 00:54:28,330
an Herculean task only
Chaudron could accomplish.
897
00:54:28,332 --> 00:54:30,299
Valfierno then sails to America
898
00:54:30,301 --> 00:54:32,701
and finds six of the greediest
art collectors
899
00:54:32,703 --> 00:54:34,937
and poses this question
to them:
900
00:54:34,939 --> 00:54:37,873
"Should the Mona Lisa
suddenly become available,
901
00:54:37,875 --> 00:54:40,676
would you pay three hundred
thousand dollars for it?"
902
00:54:40,678 --> 00:54:44,947
He asks all six,
and all six say, "Yes."
903
00:54:44,949 --> 00:54:49,285
And that is when Valfierno pays
Perugia to steal the Mona Lisa.
904
00:54:49,287 --> 00:54:51,754
He then ships
Chaudron's perfect fakes
905
00:54:51,756 --> 00:54:55,324
and collects $1.8 million.
906
00:54:55,326 --> 00:54:58,394
A fortune beyond
comprehension.
907
00:55:00,830 --> 00:55:05,367
You see, all he needed
was the news of the theft,
908
00:55:05,369 --> 00:55:08,671
not the Mona Lisa.
909
00:55:08,673 --> 00:55:14,810
To him, she herself,
is worthless.
910
00:55:16,646 --> 00:55:20,849
And that is the story of
the theft of the Mona Lisa.
911
00:55:23,387 --> 00:55:26,388
I first heard that story
when I was a small boy.
912
00:55:26,390 --> 00:55:31,560
I knew even then I wanted to have the
skills to pull something that great off.
913
00:55:31,562 --> 00:55:32,861
And that's why
I do what I do.
914
00:55:32,863 --> 00:55:34,897
I do it for the ladies.
915
00:55:38,902 --> 00:55:41,603
Well, here's to tomorrow,
916
00:55:41,605 --> 00:55:44,673
and the Reverend gets his goods
and we get our just rewards.
917
00:55:44,675 --> 00:55:47,943
- Tomorrow!
- Tomorrow!
918
00:56:02,092 --> 00:56:04,960
Ohhh, fuck.
919
00:56:04,962 --> 00:56:07,963
Oh, Jesus, Mary and Joseph.
920
00:56:07,965 --> 00:56:12,634
I, I taste an ashtray
and battery acid
921
00:56:12,636 --> 00:56:15,504
and, like, stripper perfume.
922
00:56:15,506 --> 00:56:17,473
So, we headed for Detroit?
923
00:56:17,475 --> 00:56:19,708
Finish things up with
the Reverend, or what?
924
00:56:19,710 --> 00:56:22,144
Yeah, that's right.
We all just pile into the car
925
00:56:22,146 --> 00:56:25,748
like the Brady Bunch and just
breeze on into the States, right?
926
00:56:25,750 --> 00:56:27,549
They already flagged me
for coming over here.
927
00:56:27,551 --> 00:56:29,385
- Yeah, me too.
- Me too.
928
00:56:29,387 --> 00:56:30,886
They don't like
me a lot either, so...
929
00:56:30,888 --> 00:56:33,021
what exactly is your plan?
930
00:56:33,023 --> 00:56:37,459
Well, we need someone with a
clean sheet. Francie, you're up.
931
00:56:37,461 --> 00:56:38,794
Me?!
932
00:56:45,735 --> 00:56:48,570
Really? Why am I
wearing this shit?
933
00:56:48,572 --> 00:56:50,072
Because Interpol
knows what you look like.
934
00:56:50,074 --> 00:56:53,509
OK, but don't the Amish ride
horse and carriages?
935
00:56:53,511 --> 00:56:57,045
- Well, you're progressive.
- I can't fucking do this!
936
00:56:57,047 --> 00:57:00,516
Well, you better get your best
Brando on, hoss, 'cause we need you.
937
00:57:00,518 --> 00:57:03,452
Yeah, look, Francie,
it's not The King's Speech.
938
00:57:03,454 --> 00:57:06,422
Come here.
You got two lines:
939
00:57:06,424 --> 00:57:09,158
"Going to Detroit."
And "Nothing to declare."
940
00:57:09,160 --> 00:57:11,593
You're gonna be great.
941
00:57:11,595 --> 00:57:14,763
- I'll meet him there.
- Oh. Will you?
942
00:57:14,765 --> 00:57:16,498
Yeah.
943
00:57:16,500 --> 00:57:18,100
Hey, look, somebody's got
to be in Detroit
944
00:57:18,102 --> 00:57:19,701
to close the deal
with the Reverend.
945
00:57:19,703 --> 00:57:21,837
Nicky, I'm goin' with ya.
946
00:57:21,839 --> 00:57:23,939
- We're both hiding in the trunk.
- The trunk?
947
00:57:23,941 --> 00:57:26,442
I'm not hidin' in a trunk.
948
00:57:26,444 --> 00:57:29,178
Well, then no one's
going to Detroit.
949
00:57:29,180 --> 00:57:31,780
'Cause if you're alone when you
get your digits on that money,
950
00:57:31,782 --> 00:57:33,449
we'll never see you again.
951
00:57:33,451 --> 00:57:38,020
All right, man. Fine.
952
00:57:38,022 --> 00:57:40,556
Pop it, Francie.
953
00:57:40,558 --> 00:57:43,459
- What are you doing?
- Yeah, what are you doing?
954
00:57:43,461 --> 00:57:44,927
Hopefully, you
won't have to know.
955
00:57:44,929 --> 00:57:48,230
Yes, sir. But if you
just give me...
956
00:57:48,232 --> 00:57:51,467
Sir, we are so very
close on this. We just...
957
00:57:53,170 --> 00:57:55,671
No, I realize I'm not supposed
to be in the field,
958
00:57:55,673 --> 00:57:56,939
but that's not the...
959
00:57:56,941 --> 00:58:00,108
OK. Yeah.
960
00:58:00,110 --> 00:58:03,479
Are we clear?
Are we clear? Goodbye.
961
00:58:06,015 --> 00:58:10,486
OK. We need to just
start at the beginning here, OK?
962
00:58:12,155 --> 00:58:13,555
Square one...
963
00:58:17,026 --> 00:58:18,727
art.
964
00:58:19,996 --> 00:58:22,498
- They pay you for this?
- Shut up!
965
00:58:22,500 --> 00:58:27,202
Do you often feel that your life
is just passing you by?
966
00:58:27,204 --> 00:58:32,074
I cannot even be
in the same room as you!
967
00:58:40,817 --> 00:58:43,852
OK. OK, Francie.
968
00:58:47,023 --> 00:58:49,224
I got an idea.
969
00:58:49,226 --> 00:58:53,028
I think we can make a lot more
money off that Gospel.
970
00:58:53,030 --> 00:58:54,963
Hold out for
more from the Reverend?
971
00:58:54,965 --> 00:58:57,032
No, we don't
even deliver it to him.
972
00:58:57,034 --> 00:59:00,035
OK. I fail to see
how that makes us rich.
973
00:59:00,037 --> 00:59:02,804
Guy telling that
story about the Mona Lisa
974
00:59:02,806 --> 00:59:04,640
got me thinking.
975
00:59:04,642 --> 00:59:06,875
There's a real parallel here.
976
00:59:08,244 --> 00:59:10,879
Great. Parallel.
Not interested.
977
00:59:10,881 --> 00:59:12,881
Listen, don't dismiss the idea
out of spite.
978
00:59:12,883 --> 00:59:14,016
Not interested.
979
00:59:14,018 --> 00:59:15,984
Hear me out!
980
00:59:15,986 --> 00:59:21,089
Uncle Paddy can come up
with at least ten more buyers.
981
00:59:21,091 --> 00:59:24,293
And we can get Guy to duplicate
a book for each one of them.
982
00:59:24,295 --> 00:59:28,564
We contact the gallery, we let
them know their book is stolen.
983
00:59:28,566 --> 00:59:30,832
The news hits the paper
and boom.
984
00:59:30,834 --> 00:59:33,902
Meanwhile we ship off
ten copies to ten buyers.
985
00:59:33,904 --> 00:59:35,671
Each one thinks
they have the original.
986
00:59:35,673 --> 00:59:37,940
Goddamn it if it's not perfect.
987
00:59:42,245 --> 00:59:44,279
You know...
988
00:59:44,281 --> 00:59:48,183
I think we could make
half a mil. per book.
989
00:59:48,185 --> 00:59:51,219
No, you know, twice that.
990
00:59:53,957 --> 00:59:56,024
- You know how much that is?
- Ten million.
991
00:59:56,026 --> 00:59:57,960
That's right.
992
01:00:03,800 --> 01:00:05,801
Uh, all right, boys.
993
01:00:05,803 --> 01:00:09,171
We're here so just be quiet, OK?
994
01:00:09,173 --> 01:00:11,907
- Just be cool!
- Two lines!
995
01:00:11,909 --> 01:00:14,710
"Going to Detroit!
Nothing to declare!"
996
01:00:14,712 --> 01:00:15,844
OK, I know!
997
01:00:15,846 --> 01:00:17,713
Act normal. Be normal.
Act normal.
998
01:00:17,715 --> 01:00:20,115
Just be a cool guy.
You're a cool guy, Francie.
999
01:00:20,117 --> 01:00:23,719
You're a fuckin' cool guy.
I am not cut out for this.
1000
01:00:26,789 --> 01:00:28,991
- Citizenship...
- My name is Francie Tobin!
1001
01:00:28,993 --> 01:00:31,927
Well, that's great, son.
1002
01:00:31,929 --> 01:00:33,762
- Where you headed?
- Canada!
1003
01:00:33,764 --> 01:00:35,330
Uh, you're heading in the wrong
direction...
1004
01:00:35,332 --> 01:00:37,265
Arrgghh!
1005
01:00:37,267 --> 01:00:39,067
Canada's, that's where
I came from.
1006
01:00:39,069 --> 01:00:41,303
Where I'm... Detroit
is where I'm heading,
1007
01:00:41,305 --> 01:00:45,073
not, not Canada,
which is where I'm from.
1008
01:00:45,075 --> 01:00:46,908
Anything to declare?
1009
01:00:46,910 --> 01:00:50,145
No. Not...
not even a little bit.
1010
01:00:50,147 --> 01:00:52,848
Uh, your beard's falling off.
1011
01:00:52,850 --> 01:00:58,020
Oh. That's, that's 'cause
I'm, I'm in a play.
1012
01:00:58,022 --> 01:00:59,655
What's the play called?
1013
01:00:59,657 --> 01:01:01,690
Witness, The Musical.
1014
01:01:01,692 --> 01:01:03,358
Witness, exclamation mark.
1015
01:01:04,961 --> 01:01:06,795
Are you sure there's nothing
you want to declare?
1016
01:01:06,797 --> 01:01:08,764
The play is terrible.
1017
01:01:10,867 --> 01:01:13,368
- Anything in the trunk?
- No!
1018
01:01:14,804 --> 01:01:17,005
Are you absolutely positive
1019
01:01:17,007 --> 01:01:18,306
you have nothing to declare?
1020
01:01:21,778 --> 01:01:23,178
I'm sorry?
1021
01:01:23,180 --> 01:01:25,380
Do you think I have
smugglers in my trunk?
1022
01:01:25,382 --> 01:01:28,150
- No!
- I have two American thieves
1023
01:01:28,152 --> 01:01:31,853
in the trunk of this car that I'm
crossing your border with right now.
1024
01:01:31,855 --> 01:01:33,822
Please! Please, have a look.
1025
01:01:33,824 --> 01:01:38,193
See, see all the criminal activity
happening in my trunk right now!
1026
01:01:38,195 --> 01:01:40,162
Open the trunk, sir.
1027
01:01:40,164 --> 01:01:42,330
- Open the...
- Open the trunk, just open the trunk.
1028
01:01:42,332 --> 01:01:44,866
- So I'll just... Oh!
- Nicky, Nicky, Nicky!
1029
01:01:44,868 --> 01:01:46,768
Yep. Got 'em. Got 'em.
1030
01:01:46,770 --> 01:01:48,937
- On the count of three.
- Drugs, son?
1031
01:01:48,939 --> 01:01:50,072
Oh, no. I'm good, buddy.
1032
01:01:50,074 --> 01:01:51,807
No, I mean, are you on...
1033
01:01:51,809 --> 01:01:52,941
Just open the trunk, please.
1034
01:01:52,943 --> 01:01:54,843
- Yeah, OK.
- One.
1035
01:01:54,845 --> 01:01:56,978
Two. Three.
1036
01:01:56,980 --> 01:02:00,716
OK, here we go!
1037
01:02:03,119 --> 01:02:06,321
Alrighty, looks like
you're good to go.
1038
01:02:08,224 --> 01:02:10,225
Uhh! I just need
to tell you something.
1039
01:02:10,227 --> 01:02:14,496
I liked Predator Two.
1040
01:02:14,498 --> 01:02:17,065
Well, yeah, I didn't mind
Predator Two.
1041
01:02:17,067 --> 01:02:19,201
- It's not bad.
- Its OK. Danny Glover.
1042
01:02:19,203 --> 01:02:21,236
- You can't go wrong.
- No.
1043
01:02:21,238 --> 01:02:23,371
- Break a leg.
- Oh, yeah! Thank you.
1044
01:02:23,373 --> 01:02:25,273
- Because I'm an actor.
- Yeah.
1045
01:02:25,275 --> 01:02:27,809
Oh, fuck, this sucks!
1046
01:02:44,193 --> 01:02:47,963
♪ I wandered in
late one night ♪
1047
01:02:49,532 --> 01:02:54,269
♪ Signs all said "open"
But there was no one in sight ♪
1048
01:02:57,173 --> 01:02:59,307
- I'm gonna fuckin' kill him.
- Wait your turn.
1049
01:03:00,309 --> 01:03:01,510
Come on!
1050
01:03:01,512 --> 01:03:03,178
I'm never doing this shit again!
1051
01:03:03,180 --> 01:03:05,280
- You motherfucker!
- No, no! Hold on!
1052
01:03:05,282 --> 01:03:06,948
What the fuck is this!
Come on!
1053
01:03:06,950 --> 01:03:10,051
- Fuck you!
- Hold on! Hey!
1054
01:03:10,053 --> 01:03:11,453
Fuck the both of you!
1055
01:03:11,455 --> 01:03:12,921
- You fucked up, man.
- I fucked up!
1056
01:03:12,923 --> 01:03:14,256
All right,
all right, all right!
1057
01:03:14,258 --> 01:03:16,391
I promise you,
I'm not gonna hit the kid.
1058
01:03:16,393 --> 01:03:18,994
- All right.
- You fucker!
1059
01:03:18,996 --> 01:03:21,163
- What did you do that for?
- Fuck you! Oh!
1060
01:03:21,165 --> 01:03:24,099
You had to do it.
You proud of yourself?
1061
01:03:24,101 --> 01:03:26,935
- You motherfucker! Ah, you motherfucker.
- Please!
1062
01:03:26,937 --> 01:03:29,571
Hey, hey, hey, hey.
Hey, man. How's business?
1063
01:03:30,973 --> 01:03:34,209
It's fucking slow, man.
1064
01:03:42,218 --> 01:03:43,952
All right,
what is this place?
1065
01:03:43,954 --> 01:03:45,420
His office
is on the third floor.
1066
01:03:45,422 --> 01:03:47,989
I think he paid like
three grand for the whole place.
1067
01:03:47,991 --> 01:03:50,525
He overpaid.
1068
01:03:51,928 --> 01:03:53,195
This is a golden
opportunity.
1069
01:03:53,197 --> 01:03:55,564
I'm not doing this for me.
1070
01:03:55,566 --> 01:03:58,867
You know I'm flush.
I'm doing this for you.
1071
01:03:58,869 --> 01:04:01,369
We're dropping this off, we're making
a hell of a decent score here.
1072
01:04:01,371 --> 01:04:02,871
And in five minutes
we're going home.
1073
01:04:02,873 --> 01:04:04,606
Give me a reason.
Give me one reason.
1074
01:04:04,608 --> 01:04:08,410
OK. Where do we find the money
to pay for these fakes?
1075
01:04:08,412 --> 01:04:11,046
It cost Guy ten grand
to fake one.
1076
01:04:11,048 --> 01:04:13,315
These fakes would have to
stand up to carbon dating
1077
01:04:13,317 --> 01:04:15,016
and expert scrutiny shit.
1078
01:04:15,018 --> 01:04:16,918
Ten grand a book,
that's a hundred grand.
1079
01:04:16,920 --> 01:04:18,987
- I can front it.
- You got a 100 grand laying around, Nicky?
1080
01:04:18,989 --> 01:04:21,156
Yes, I do.
1081
01:04:24,861 --> 01:04:26,928
You know,
I guess this is it.
1082
01:04:26,930 --> 01:04:28,864
This could have been big.
1083
01:04:28,866 --> 01:04:32,000
We could have made history.
1084
01:04:42,578 --> 01:04:44,112
Damn it.
1085
01:04:46,182 --> 01:04:49,417
All right, let's go downstairs
and talk about it.
1086
01:04:55,057 --> 01:04:58,293
A million per book.
Ten million bucks, guys.
1087
01:04:58,295 --> 01:05:01,396
- You interested?
- Of course, I'm fucking interested.
1088
01:05:01,398 --> 01:05:03,965
- Wonderful.
- Uncle Paddy?
1089
01:05:03,967 --> 01:05:05,600
Ten buyers, I can find.
Maybe more.
1090
01:05:05,602 --> 01:05:07,402
No, no, no.
Let's stick with ten.
1091
01:05:07,404 --> 01:05:09,204
Let's not get greedy here.
1092
01:05:09,206 --> 01:05:12,140
- Guy, when can you get started?
- Today. Now.
1093
01:05:12,142 --> 01:05:15,176
It will take me maybe
three weeks... No, one month.
1094
01:05:15,178 --> 01:05:17,946
- I just need money.
- OK, 100 grand, that's covered.
1095
01:05:17,948 --> 01:05:20,015
Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
1096
01:05:20,017 --> 01:05:22,384
Seven hundred,
fifty thousand, minimum.
1097
01:05:22,386 --> 01:05:24,319
You just made
one for ten thousand.
1098
01:05:24,321 --> 01:05:28,223
No. I made the cover for ten
grand. The pages are total shit.
1099
01:05:28,225 --> 01:05:32,294
And if you want these to pass the carbon
dating and the professional scrutiny,
1100
01:05:32,296 --> 01:05:33,995
seven hundred fifty.
1101
01:05:33,997 --> 01:05:35,497
Do we need
to carbon date them?
1102
01:05:35,499 --> 01:05:38,033
With our buyers,
most certainly.
1103
01:05:38,035 --> 01:05:41,269
That's it, man.
Let's go take it back.
1104
01:05:41,271 --> 01:05:43,471
All right, look.
1105
01:05:43,473 --> 01:05:47,075
I could come up with
about $300,000.
1106
01:05:47,077 --> 01:05:48,176
- But...
- What?
1107
01:05:48,178 --> 01:05:49,945
Gonna take me a couple days.
1108
01:05:49,947 --> 01:05:51,479
We still need 450.
1109
01:05:51,481 --> 01:05:54,316
I can pull together
a hundred thousand.
1110
01:05:54,318 --> 01:05:56,151
I can do one hundred.
1111
01:05:56,153 --> 01:06:00,188
OK. That's five.
We're still 250 short.
1112
01:06:00,190 --> 01:06:02,424
Yeah.
1113
01:06:04,226 --> 01:06:06,294
OK, we'll be home at dawn.
1114
01:06:06,296 --> 01:06:08,029
Let's figure this out tomorrow.
1115
01:06:08,031 --> 01:06:09,497
OK.
1116
01:06:11,500 --> 01:06:13,435
- Crunch.
- What?
1117
01:06:13,437 --> 01:06:16,404
- How much money have you got?
- I got nothin'.
1118
01:06:18,040 --> 01:06:22,277
If there was ever a reason
to mortgage your home...
1119
01:06:22,279 --> 01:06:23,745
Oh, no, no, no, no, man.
I'm not doing that.
1120
01:06:23,747 --> 01:06:26,014
No, not the house.
That's all I got.
1121
01:06:26,016 --> 01:06:28,616
If we pull this off,
you can buy ten of 'em.
1122
01:06:28,618 --> 01:06:31,186
Look, man, I just...
1123
01:06:31,188 --> 01:06:32,420
Look, I don't know, OK?
1124
01:06:32,422 --> 01:06:33,555
Listen, I gotta think about it.
1125
01:06:33,557 --> 01:06:35,223
I wanna run it by Lola.
1126
01:06:35,225 --> 01:06:37,392
Well, don't take too long.
We don't have time to lose.
1127
01:06:37,394 --> 01:06:41,096
Don't talk to me
about lost time, Nicky.
1128
01:06:53,442 --> 01:06:55,410
I know what you want.
1129
01:06:55,412 --> 01:07:00,148
Good. 'Cause you're
gonna need to talk to him.
1130
01:07:01,250 --> 01:07:02,684
He will never give
you all that money.
1131
01:07:02,686 --> 01:07:04,252
No, but he'll
give it to you.
1132
01:07:04,254 --> 01:07:06,521
- To me?
- He trusts you.
1133
01:07:06,523 --> 01:07:09,424
And we're gonna be wiring money
all over the world.
1134
01:07:10,659 --> 01:07:12,694
You're the only one that's not
on any watch list.
1135
01:07:12,696 --> 01:07:15,730
- Francie isn't.
- Francie hasn't taken a bath in six weeks.
1136
01:07:17,667 --> 01:07:19,667
Come on.
1137
01:07:21,303 --> 01:07:23,038
Can you convince him?
1138
01:07:27,076 --> 01:07:29,310
It's no good. It's no good.
She's making you, Crunch.
1139
01:07:29,312 --> 01:07:31,079
She's probably
fucking Nicky.
1140
01:07:31,081 --> 01:07:33,815
Hey, easy. Easy,
Francie, come on.
1141
01:07:33,817 --> 01:07:36,584
We should just walk.
I mean, he's juicing you
1142
01:07:36,586 --> 01:07:39,621
for hundreds of thousands
of dollars, Crunch.
1143
01:07:39,623 --> 01:07:44,092
Cowards die many times
before their actual death.
1144
01:07:44,094 --> 01:07:46,828
The brave, only but once.
1145
01:07:46,830 --> 01:07:48,696
Is that Julius Caesar?
1146
01:07:48,698 --> 01:07:53,802
Yes! Look, I know how you feel
about Nicky, believe me.
1147
01:07:54,603 --> 01:07:56,604
But this...
1148
01:07:58,574 --> 01:08:02,177
this is the one we're
all gonna be remembered for.
1149
01:08:02,179 --> 01:08:04,813
Ah, Jesus Murphy.
1150
01:08:31,474 --> 01:08:33,108
Ah, you waste no time.
1151
01:08:33,110 --> 01:08:35,110
What can I say?
I'm excited.
1152
01:08:35,112 --> 01:08:37,245
OK. Great, we're all here.
1153
01:08:37,247 --> 01:08:40,348
So, starting tomorrow,
there'll be no contact.
1154
01:08:40,350 --> 01:08:43,384
During that time period
Paddy will have made the sales,
1155
01:08:43,386 --> 01:08:45,353
Guy will have completed
the books.
1156
01:08:45,355 --> 01:08:46,888
Crunch will be ready
to ship them.
1157
01:08:46,890 --> 01:08:49,824
And Lola will be
handling the money.
1158
01:08:49,826 --> 01:08:52,660
In a month's time,
we'll contact Amsterdam,
1159
01:08:52,662 --> 01:08:56,764
the news will get out, we ship
the books and we get rich.
1160
01:08:56,766 --> 01:08:59,200
Ha. The Reverend's
gonna be some pissed.
1161
01:08:59,202 --> 01:09:00,335
I'll take care of the Reverend.
1162
01:09:00,337 --> 01:09:01,603
I'll call you
with his number.
1163
01:09:01,605 --> 01:09:04,372
All right, Nicky, I just
gotta say this.
1164
01:09:04,374 --> 01:09:07,375
If you're gettin' ready to
do me wrong here somehow,
1165
01:09:07,377 --> 01:09:10,145
this is your chance. Just don't
take this and all is forgiven, man.
1166
01:09:10,147 --> 01:09:11,679
No harm, no foul.
1167
01:09:12,882 --> 01:09:17,218
Crunch, I'm sorry
about what happened.
1168
01:09:17,220 --> 01:09:19,554
OK, I fucked up.
1169
01:09:19,556 --> 01:09:21,789
I wish I could do it
all over again.
1170
01:09:21,791 --> 01:09:25,160
But I can't.
We gotta move on.
1171
01:09:26,562 --> 01:09:31,199
Look, you've always wanted to do
something big, we all have.
1172
01:09:31,201 --> 01:09:32,800
This is our chance.
1173
01:09:32,802 --> 01:09:38,773
Come on, man, let's do
this together, like brothers.
1174
01:09:45,347 --> 01:09:46,381
OK, man, I'm in.
1175
01:09:47,717 --> 01:09:50,552
All right.
Here's to us, huh?
1176
01:09:50,554 --> 01:09:52,487
Right!
1177
01:09:54,291 --> 01:09:56,658
Gettin' our just rewards.
1178
01:10:11,440 --> 01:10:14,442
Truly breathtaking, it is.
1179
01:10:14,444 --> 01:10:17,946
Oh, bloody hell. Hey, Midge.
How you fixed for quarters?
1180
01:10:17,948 --> 01:10:20,315
- Dirty Ernie.
- Hey, Nicky!
1181
01:10:20,317 --> 01:10:23,585
- Give us a hug!
- I'm not a big hugger, Ernie.
1182
01:10:23,587 --> 01:10:28,223
Huh. Midge, go take a walk.
1183
01:10:28,225 --> 01:10:30,225
I'll see you at the hotel.
1184
01:10:32,861 --> 01:10:34,429
Now watch it, Ernie.
1185
01:10:34,431 --> 01:10:36,231
The hookers in this town
aren't the cleanest.
1186
01:10:36,233 --> 01:10:38,700
Hey! That's my wife.
1187
01:10:38,702 --> 01:10:41,236
Oh. Ernie, I'm sorry.
1188
01:10:41,238 --> 01:10:45,406
Yeah, it's just, I guess the fashion
in Europe is so much further ahead...
1189
01:10:45,408 --> 01:10:50,411
I'm pulling your chain,
mate. That's a hooker.
1190
01:10:52,248 --> 01:10:55,383
So, what's the plan?
1191
01:10:57,820 --> 01:11:02,657
OK. You're gonna knock off ten copies
of the Gospel According to James.
1192
01:11:02,659 --> 01:11:04,926
- All right.
- Simultaneously,
1193
01:11:04,928 --> 01:11:07,729
Guy De Cornet will be in that
building doing the same.
1194
01:11:07,731 --> 01:11:09,297
No. He sickens me, he does.
1195
01:11:09,299 --> 01:11:10,965
His work is so ostentatious...
1196
01:11:10,967 --> 01:11:14,269
Oh, forget him.
Just focus on your own work.
1197
01:11:14,271 --> 01:11:15,770
Here's a key to the building.
1198
01:11:15,772 --> 01:11:18,573
All right.
1199
01:11:18,575 --> 01:11:20,575
Guy's books will be perfect.
1200
01:11:20,577 --> 01:11:23,344
They'll pass carbon dating,
expert analysis, everything.
1201
01:11:23,346 --> 01:11:27,882
However, your copies, they won't
need any of that carbon dating crap.
1202
01:11:27,884 --> 01:11:30,018
They'll just need to
look convincing.
1203
01:11:30,020 --> 01:11:31,786
Oh, that's much, much cheaper.
1204
01:11:31,788 --> 01:11:33,621
But tell me this, why?
1205
01:11:33,623 --> 01:11:36,491
Why bother getting all that
proper paper for Guy's books?
1206
01:11:36,493 --> 01:11:39,060
Why... why bother
working that lot at all?
1207
01:11:39,062 --> 01:11:41,963
Because I plan on sending
your ten copies of the book
1208
01:11:41,965 --> 01:11:44,599
to the buyers before
they can send theirs.
1209
01:11:44,601 --> 01:11:46,836
This way, you and I can
split it two ways instead
1210
01:11:46,862 --> 01:11:48,936
of me having to cut it
up five ways with them.
1211
01:11:48,938 --> 01:11:51,506
I see. Family's family,
but money's money, eh?
1212
01:11:51,508 --> 01:11:55,476
Yeah, well, let me tell you
something about family.
1213
01:11:55,478 --> 01:11:58,980
Crunch would do the same damn thing
if he had any brains in his head.
1214
01:11:58,982 --> 01:12:02,583
Yeah, but then he
delivers his books
1215
01:12:02,585 --> 01:12:05,320
a week after you've
delivered yours,
1216
01:12:05,322 --> 01:12:09,424
they're gonna crucify him,
and that greasy twat, Guy.
1217
01:12:09,426 --> 01:12:12,360
But then they're gonna come
after you, my fine chum.
1218
01:12:13,663 --> 01:12:16,564
I won't be around.
1219
01:12:17,466 --> 01:12:18,933
Yeah?
1220
01:12:18,935 --> 01:12:22,003
Nicky, you still want
the Reverend's number?
1221
01:12:22,005 --> 01:12:25,873
- Text it to me, Paddy.
- Consider it done.
1222
01:12:31,915 --> 01:12:35,717
- Reverend: Yeah, what?
- Yeah. Hi, Reverend. It's Nicky Calhoun.
1223
01:12:37,553 --> 01:12:40,621
What? Nicky Calhoun?
1224
01:12:40,623 --> 01:12:42,890
What are you doin'
callin' me?
1225
01:12:42,892 --> 01:12:45,960
Listen, I just wanted to let you
know that we've got your book
1226
01:12:45,962 --> 01:12:49,731
and just wanted to give you a
heads up, there's a slight delay.
1227
01:12:49,733 --> 01:12:51,632
- Delay?
- Right. With the delivery time.
1228
01:12:51,634 --> 01:12:53,668
It might take a month or so.
1229
01:12:53,670 --> 01:12:59,474
Look, I don't know what the
fuck you're talking about.
Don't call me again.
1230
01:13:01,009 --> 01:13:02,543
Listen, I'm gonna come see you
1231
01:13:02,545 --> 01:13:04,846
and we can discuss it then.
How's that?
1232
01:13:06,449 --> 01:13:10,084
Reverend? Reverend?
1233
01:13:13,389 --> 01:13:15,556
Not here. Leave a message.
1234
01:13:15,558 --> 01:13:16,958
Reverend, again,
I apologize about the delay.
1235
01:13:16,960 --> 01:13:18,526
I'm on my way to Detroit
1236
01:13:18,528 --> 01:13:20,428
so you and I can have
a face-to-face.
1237
01:13:34,009 --> 01:13:36,677
Reverend?
1238
01:14:04,072 --> 01:14:06,607
I think he paid, like,
three grand for the whole place.
1239
01:14:06,609 --> 01:14:09,477
Why is it I've not heard that
such as famous book as yours was nicked?
1240
01:14:12,115 --> 01:14:12,925
Paddy, come on.
1241
01:14:12,951 --> 01:14:15,950
Just listen to the story,
before you say no, lads.
1242
01:14:15,952 --> 01:14:17,685
There's a good moral
to this story.
1243
01:14:17,687 --> 01:14:19,520
Paddy McCarthy here.
1244
01:14:19,522 --> 01:14:21,222
- Leave me a message and I'll call you back.
- Fuck!
1245
01:14:21,224 --> 01:14:24,125
The special Gospel.
1246
01:14:24,127 --> 01:14:25,726
Last month,
at the Vanderloos Gallery...
1247
01:14:28,598 --> 01:14:29,997
I'd like to report a theft.
1248
01:14:29,999 --> 01:14:31,699
I don't understand.
1249
01:14:31,701 --> 01:14:33,034
We're not the police.
1250
01:14:33,036 --> 01:14:35,136
No, no, no.
It's a book in your collection.
1251
01:14:35,138 --> 01:14:37,638
A Gospel printed by
the Gutenberg Press.
1252
01:14:37,640 --> 01:14:39,640
Yeah. I think you are mistaken.
1253
01:14:39,642 --> 01:14:42,176
No, no, no. It's the Gospel
According to James and it's a fake.
1254
01:14:42,178 --> 01:14:44,745
- Check it out.
- I can't do that.
1255
01:14:44,747 --> 01:14:47,048
- Why not?
- We are sculpture museum.
1256
01:14:47,050 --> 01:14:52,153
We have no books or paintings.
We have only sculpture.
1257
01:14:52,155 --> 01:14:54,956
The Reverend's
got somebody on the inside.
1258
01:14:54,958 --> 01:14:56,958
We have an
expert coming in on Saturday.
1259
01:14:56,980 --> 01:14:58,259
Paddy, get us a name.
1260
01:14:58,261 --> 01:15:00,962
We're sorry. The number
you have reached is not in service.
1261
01:15:00,964 --> 01:15:03,664
- Later, Crunch!
- There's gotta be like, what...
1262
01:15:03,666 --> 01:15:04,166
Fuck!
1263
01:15:04,179 --> 01:15:06,100
ten experts in the country
they could have called.
1264
01:15:06,102 --> 01:15:08,503
- Olga Something-Long.
- Hello?
1265
01:15:08,505 --> 01:15:09,604
It's Nicky Calhoun.
1266
01:15:09,606 --> 01:15:11,939
Have you... Have you seen Paddy?
1267
01:15:11,941 --> 01:15:14,075
- What?
- Did you fuckin' see Paddy?
1268
01:15:14,077 --> 01:15:16,644
He left a couple of days ago.
1269
01:15:16,646 --> 01:15:20,014
What about the Gospel? Did Customs
ask you to look at the Gospel?
1270
01:15:20,016 --> 01:15:22,817
- Gospel?
- The fuckin' Gospel According to James!
1271
01:15:22,819 --> 01:15:25,219
Did they ask you to look at it?
1272
01:15:26,722 --> 01:15:28,122
What?
1273
01:15:41,770 --> 01:15:45,106
And that is the story of
the theft of the Mona Lisa.
1274
01:15:45,108 --> 01:15:50,278
You just took five and half of the
best years of my life away, Nicky.
1275
01:15:50,280 --> 01:15:52,146
Nicky Boy,
1276
01:15:52,148 --> 01:15:53,681
you'll pay the piper for
what you did to Dennis.
1277
01:15:53,683 --> 01:15:54,982
I'll see to it meself.
1278
01:15:54,984 --> 01:15:56,183
I'll take care of the Reverend.
1279
01:15:56,185 --> 01:15:57,818
I'll call you
with his number.
1280
01:15:57,820 --> 01:16:00,087
Yeah?
1281
01:16:00,089 --> 01:16:03,190
Nicky, want
the Reverend's number?
1282
01:16:13,168 --> 01:16:15,102
We could have made history.
1283
01:16:23,579 --> 01:16:25,580
Please leave a message.
1284
01:16:25,582 --> 01:16:27,882
Lola, pick up the phone.
1285
01:16:27,884 --> 01:16:30,785
Call me! We got a problem!
1286
01:16:33,722 --> 01:16:36,757
So, so what are you
telling me? You don't trust me.
1287
01:16:36,759 --> 01:16:39,760
It's not like I
don't trust you. Come on.
1288
01:16:39,762 --> 01:16:42,663
- Everybody's fuckin' lyin' to me.
- Nobody's lyin'.
1289
01:16:42,665 --> 01:16:46,200
It's like, uh, well, I'll tell you
what it's like, it's like Claudius.
1290
01:16:46,202 --> 01:16:49,670
For my money, the greatest
Roman Emperor of them all.
1291
01:16:49,672 --> 01:16:55,076
You know how Claudius survived some of
the most brutal rulers of his time?
1292
01:16:55,078 --> 01:16:58,346
How he outlived all those crazy-assed
homicidal family members?
1293
01:16:58,348 --> 01:17:00,748
- How?
- Played the fool.
1294
01:17:02,084 --> 01:17:04,118
Played the fool
and fooled them all.
1295
01:17:04,120 --> 01:17:06,754
Even those he loved.
1296
01:17:09,192 --> 01:17:11,359
Bick.
1297
01:17:11,361 --> 01:17:14,729
Uh, OK.
1298
01:17:17,299 --> 01:17:18,966
Hello?
1299
01:17:19,835 --> 01:17:21,702
Four twenty-six?
1300
01:17:22,804 --> 01:17:24,205
OK.
1301
01:17:29,945 --> 01:17:32,847
How long have you
been cooking this thing up?
1302
01:17:32,849 --> 01:17:35,349
Well, you remember
Lola's little hot tub party?
1303
01:17:35,351 --> 01:17:37,752
And great men don't
miss their fate.
1304
01:17:37,754 --> 01:17:39,954
I missed mine, Francie.
1305
01:17:39,956 --> 01:17:44,859
I was probably staring at it the
whole time and I just missed it.
1306
01:17:44,861 --> 01:17:48,229
So everyone was in on this
except for my lanky ass.
1307
01:17:48,231 --> 01:17:51,265
People are predictable Francis,
you, me.
1308
01:17:51,267 --> 01:17:53,134
If we weren't,
we'd just spend all our time
1309
01:17:53,136 --> 01:17:55,803
trying to figure out what crazy
shit everybody else was up to.
1310
01:17:55,805 --> 01:17:59,273
All I did was
drop off a sculpture.
1311
01:17:59,275 --> 01:18:02,109
And then picked it on up.
1312
01:18:02,111 --> 01:18:05,312
I just needed to plant the idea and
let his imagination do the rest.
1313
01:18:05,314 --> 01:18:08,182
Saturday, ten AM. Guy
walks into the border station.
1314
01:18:08,184 --> 01:18:11,218
- I got Guy on the other line.
- OK. I'm in.
1315
01:18:32,974 --> 01:18:34,408
Yeah.
1316
01:18:50,859 --> 01:18:55,162
- You got a warrant?
- I don't need a warrant. I'm not a cop.
1317
01:18:55,164 --> 01:18:57,465
But these guys are.
1318
01:18:57,467 --> 01:18:59,900
Domenic Calhoun,
we've received information
1319
01:18:59,902 --> 01:19:03,270
giving us probable cause
for a search.
1320
01:19:03,272 --> 01:19:05,406
Look who we have here.
1321
01:19:06,341 --> 01:19:08,309
Georges Seurat.
1322
01:19:08,311 --> 01:19:12,813
"Model, Rear-View," 1887.
1323
01:19:12,815 --> 01:19:14,181
Pointillist phase.
1324
01:19:22,924 --> 01:19:25,126
This is so beautiful.
1325
01:19:27,095 --> 01:19:29,263
I love all the little dots.
1326
01:19:29,265 --> 01:19:31,799
It's very artistic.
1327
01:19:42,277 --> 01:19:44,812
- You got it?
- I do.
1328
01:19:46,148 --> 01:19:47,515
Where's your filly?
1329
01:19:47,517 --> 01:19:50,417
She'll be here, Paddy.
1330
01:19:50,419 --> 01:19:54,955
The lady has $750 grand
of our capital.
1331
01:19:56,291 --> 01:19:58,793
I don't know,
mon frere, she's maybe...
1332
01:19:58,795 --> 01:20:01,929
How do you say it?
The scheming bitch.
1333
01:20:01,931 --> 01:20:04,064
Hey, guys, she's doin'
something, all right?
1334
01:20:04,066 --> 01:20:07,067
Says she's got some kind
of surprise for me.
1335
01:20:07,069 --> 01:20:09,370
She's just runnin' late,
that's all.
1336
01:20:11,473 --> 01:20:12,940
We should just go.
We should leave.
1337
01:20:12,942 --> 01:20:16,010
Yeah, Crunch, bud,
I love you.
1338
01:20:16,012 --> 01:20:18,946
You know I'm with you.
1339
01:20:18,948 --> 01:20:22,049
I really think she
just fuckin' split.
1340
01:20:22,051 --> 01:20:25,553
Just as likely to see a police cruiser as
her car comin' around the corner, lad.
1341
01:20:31,293 --> 01:20:34,428
- Oh, cool.
- What?
1342
01:20:34,430 --> 01:20:38,132
I, I saw you fight at the bar.
1343
01:20:38,134 --> 01:20:39,600
Did you?
1344
01:20:39,602 --> 01:20:42,603
Then he said you could
hold onto it as insurance.
1345
01:20:42,605 --> 01:20:45,039
Now I'm gonna
point at you really hard.
1346
01:20:45,041 --> 01:20:46,761
OK, fine. Then I'm
gonna raise up my arms...
1347
01:20:47,977 --> 01:20:50,044
OK, fine.
1348
01:20:52,180 --> 01:20:56,050
So, you mean, you really went
through all this trouble
1349
01:20:56,052 --> 01:20:59,119
just to rob Nicky
of 300 grand?
1350
01:20:59,121 --> 01:21:02,423
Three hundred thousand?
Try 20 million.
1351
01:21:02,425 --> 01:21:05,292
This is where the story
becomes interesting.
1352
01:21:05,294 --> 01:21:07,361
Two weeks ago,
this painting was stolen
1353
01:21:07,363 --> 01:21:08,629
from an art
collector in Mexico.
1354
01:21:08,631 --> 01:21:10,965
Fate, Francie.
1355
01:21:10,967 --> 01:21:12,633
Fate is what just happened.
1356
01:21:12,635 --> 01:21:15,269
I need you to find
something for me.
1357
01:21:15,271 --> 01:21:17,504
Uncle Paddy could
come up with ten buyers easily.
1358
01:21:17,506 --> 01:21:19,874
Ten buyers I can find,
maybe more.
1359
01:21:19,876 --> 01:21:23,277
You see, all he needed was
the news of the theft.
1360
01:21:23,279 --> 01:21:26,213
Paddy McCarthy here.
I got a piece you might be interested in.
1361
01:21:26,215 --> 01:21:28,415
And she's a real beauty.
1362
01:21:28,417 --> 01:21:29,884
Where's the Seurat?
1363
01:21:29,886 --> 01:21:31,552
Georges Seurat,
you ignorant fuck!
1364
01:21:31,554 --> 01:21:33,954
The seminal French
"Post-Impressionalist".
1365
01:21:33,956 --> 01:21:35,456
The father of pointillism
1366
01:21:35,458 --> 01:21:38,058
- That Georges Seurat!
- This is all about the Seurat.
1367
01:21:38,060 --> 01:21:39,326
This has nothing to do
with Nicky's painting.
1368
01:21:39,328 --> 01:21:40,628
If this is even close to real,
1369
01:21:40,630 --> 01:21:42,496
Paddy's gonna make a bundle.
1370
01:21:42,498 --> 01:21:44,531
We still need
four hundred and fifty.
1371
01:21:44,533 --> 01:21:47,301
I can pull together
a hundred thousand.
1372
01:21:47,303 --> 01:21:49,904
I can do one hundred.
1373
01:21:53,275 --> 01:21:57,211
This is the one we're all
gonna be remembered for.
1374
01:21:57,213 --> 01:21:59,413
Ah.
1375
01:21:59,415 --> 01:22:04,285
Ten forgeries,
seven already shipped.
1376
01:22:04,287 --> 01:22:06,220
That's twenty million.
1377
01:22:06,222 --> 01:22:09,156
I really like
this heist shit.
1378
01:22:09,158 --> 01:22:11,091
Ah, careful!
That's the original.
1379
01:22:11,093 --> 01:22:13,060
Wait, you kept the real one?
1380
01:22:13,062 --> 01:22:15,596
The one... Interpol know the
one in Nicky's room is fake?
1381
01:22:15,598 --> 01:22:17,932
Interpol already thinks
they have the real one.
1382
01:22:17,934 --> 01:22:19,967
I just want to hold it.
1383
01:22:19,969 --> 01:22:22,369
How would you
like live with it, Sam?
1384
01:22:25,674 --> 01:22:28,976
I think I'd like
that very much.
1385
01:22:28,978 --> 01:22:30,444
The first time you see it,
1386
01:22:30,446 --> 01:22:34,114
you say it's real,
whether it is or not.
1387
01:22:34,116 --> 01:22:39,553
Absolutely, positively,
the real thing.
1388
01:22:39,555 --> 01:22:43,123
Boom! Oh ho!
Come on, boys in blue!
1389
01:22:43,125 --> 01:22:46,327
Suit guy! Whoo! Come on!
1390
01:22:46,329 --> 01:22:49,129
- One for the good guys!
- Indeed.
1391
01:22:49,131 --> 01:22:52,566
Well, everybody,
it's truly been a pleasure.
1392
01:22:52,568 --> 01:22:56,403
- You did it, Dennis.
- One for the ages, eh?
1393
01:22:56,405 --> 01:22:58,272
Either write something
worth reading about,
1394
01:22:58,274 --> 01:23:00,240
or do something
worth writing about.
1395
01:23:00,242 --> 01:23:03,310
Don't spend it all
in one place.
1396
01:23:08,183 --> 01:23:09,550
Seasoned crooks swear
1397
01:23:09,552 --> 01:23:11,452
there's only two days
you remember
1398
01:23:11,454 --> 01:23:13,988
about your stretch in prison:
1399
01:23:13,990 --> 01:23:15,489
the day you get in...
1400
01:23:17,360 --> 01:23:19,093
and the day you get out.
1401
01:23:20,328 --> 01:23:22,463
And you'll
only remember your last
1402
01:23:22,465 --> 01:23:25,699
so long as you've got
something waiting for you.
1403
01:23:25,701 --> 01:23:28,369
- One wallet. One watch.
- As of the day you're released,
1404
01:23:28,371 --> 01:23:30,537
they can't inspect your mail.
1405
01:23:30,539 --> 01:23:35,476
Oh, and this arrived this
morning. Just cleared.
1406
01:23:35,478 --> 01:23:37,444
Who's it from?
1407
01:23:37,446 --> 01:23:39,113
Doesn't say.
1408
01:23:39,115 --> 01:23:40,714
I could never be certain,
1409
01:23:40,716 --> 01:23:43,417
but I had faith.
1410
01:23:43,419 --> 01:23:46,086
I had trust.
1411
01:23:47,355 --> 01:23:50,257
And if you've got no trust...
1412
01:23:51,726 --> 01:23:53,794
then what do you got?
1413
01:23:58,299 --> 01:24:01,235
♪ Stop me, baby
1414
01:24:02,804 --> 01:24:05,339
♪ Ooh
1415
01:24:06,708 --> 01:24:10,411
♪ I'm feelin' awful, baby
1416
01:24:10,413 --> 01:24:14,448
♪ Like I'm locked up
in a cage ♪
1417
01:24:14,450 --> 01:24:18,052
♪ Like a dog
who lost his collar ♪
1418
01:24:18,054 --> 01:24:20,821
♪ A show without a stage
1419
01:24:22,057 --> 01:24:25,292
♪ I gotta move
1420
01:24:26,361 --> 01:24:29,196
♪ Gotta pack my bags and go
1421
01:24:30,331 --> 01:24:32,699
♪ Gotta move
1422
01:24:34,235 --> 01:24:36,703
♪ Gotta pack my bags and go
1423
01:24:38,173 --> 01:24:41,241
♪ I can't stay around here
1424
01:24:42,243 --> 01:24:44,778
♪ And baby I'm sure you know
1425
01:24:46,281 --> 01:24:48,115
♪ This love
1426
01:24:48,117 --> 01:24:50,417
♪ This love...
1427
01:24:50,419 --> 01:24:52,519
- What painting?
- The Seurat.
1428
01:24:52,521 --> 01:24:54,121
Whoa. Whoa. What?
1429
01:24:54,123 --> 01:24:57,157
The Georges Seurat,
you ignorant fuck.
1430
01:24:57,159 --> 01:25:00,127
The seminal post French
"Impressionalisht".
1431
01:25:00,129 --> 01:25:03,864
The father of fucking... Fuck!
1432
01:25:03,866 --> 01:25:07,734
The seminal founder of
"Post-Impressionalism".
1433
01:25:07,736 --> 01:25:10,237
- The father of pointillism.
- Seminal French
1434
01:25:10,239 --> 01:25:13,173
- Post-Impressionist.
- Seminal French Post-Impressionist.
1435
01:25:13,175 --> 01:25:15,109
- And father of pointillism.
- And father of pointillism.
1436
01:25:15,111 --> 01:25:17,578
The seminal French
"Post-Impressionalist".
1437
01:25:17,580 --> 01:25:21,181
The founder of fuckin', fuckin'
and the fuck line-ups.
1438
01:25:22,136 --> 01:25:25,819
Arr, matey! The Georges
Seurat, you ignorant fuck.
1439
01:25:25,821 --> 01:25:28,722
The seminal father of
"Post-Impressionalism".
1440
01:25:28,724 --> 01:25:31,225
The founder of fuckin'...
1441
01:25:31,227 --> 01:25:32,759
That guy!
1442
01:25:32,761 --> 01:25:35,329
The Seminal French
"Post-Impressionalist".
1443
01:25:35,331 --> 01:25:36,697
The father of pointillism.
1444
01:25:36,699 --> 01:25:39,199
That Georges Seurat,
you fuckin' baboon.
1445
01:25:40,769 --> 01:25:43,470
He's the seminal French
"Post-Impressionalist"!
1446
01:25:45,173 --> 01:25:46,907
My God, you're a downer.
1447
01:25:46,909 --> 01:25:49,343
What the fuck,
what are you, Eeyore?
1448
01:25:49,345 --> 01:25:50,777
What are you, Morrissey?
1449
01:25:50,779 --> 01:25:52,913
What are you,
fuckin' Willy Loman?
1450
01:25:52,915 --> 01:25:54,848
A fuckin' boner killer.
1451
01:25:54,850 --> 01:25:57,718
A boner-killer?
1452
01:26:00,288 --> 01:26:05,192
Even for you, Francie,
I refuse to be a boner killer.
1453
01:26:06,761 --> 01:26:08,762
So, should I get the door?
1454
01:26:10,566 --> 01:26:12,599
I'll get the door.
1455
01:26:13,801 --> 01:26:16,170
I'll get it.
1456
01:26:16,172 --> 01:26:17,604
Hoo hoo!
1457
01:26:19,240 --> 01:26:21,742
- I'm in a play.
- Yeah?
1458
01:26:21,744 --> 01:26:24,244
- What's it called?
- Amish Cats.
1459
01:26:24,246 --> 01:26:26,180
- What's it called?
- Punch My Pussy.
1460
01:26:26,182 --> 01:26:28,215
Punch My Pussy?
1461
01:26:28,217 --> 01:26:30,284
- Wait. What's it called?
- Cats.
1462
01:26:30,286 --> 01:26:31,852
The... The Cats?
1463
01:26:31,854 --> 01:26:35,389
The Cats. Cats or The Cats.
1464
01:26:35,391 --> 01:26:37,758
- All rightee. With the beard?
- Yeah.
1465
01:26:37,760 --> 01:26:40,761
♪ I gotta move
1466
01:26:42,330 --> 01:26:44,798
♪ Gotta pack my bags and go
1467
01:26:46,201 --> 01:26:48,569
♪ Gotta move
1468
01:26:50,205 --> 01:26:52,506
♪ Gotta pack my bags and go
1469
01:26:54,242 --> 01:26:57,211
♪ I can't stay around here
1470
01:26:58,246 --> 01:27:00,881
♪ Baby, I'm sure you know
1471
01:27:02,250 --> 01:27:03,850
♪ This love
1472
01:27:03,852 --> 01:27:05,886
♪ This love
1473
01:27:05,888 --> 01:27:09,823
♪ This love ain't big enough
for the two of us ♪
1474
01:27:11,926 --> 01:27:14,761
♪ I'm off to see the country
1475
01:27:15,830 --> 01:27:18,632
♪ And breathe the ocean air
1476
01:27:19,767 --> 01:27:22,736
♪ I can't take your whining
1477
01:27:23,671 --> 01:27:27,608
♪ But how, I just don't care
1478
01:27:27,610 --> 01:27:31,645
♪ I gotta get moving
1479
01:27:31,647 --> 01:27:33,947
♪ By road or in the street
1480
01:27:35,583 --> 01:27:39,019
♪ This love is like
Hell's Kitchen ♪
1481
01:27:39,021 --> 01:27:41,922
♪ And I just can't
take the heat ♪
1482
01:27:43,625 --> 01:27:45,559
♪ This love
1483
01:27:45,561 --> 01:27:47,527
♪ This love
1484
01:27:47,529 --> 01:27:51,698
♪ This love ain't big enough
for the two of us ♪
1485
01:27:56,371 --> 01:28:00,007
♪ You used to be so sweet
1486
01:28:00,009 --> 01:28:03,377
♪ Well, all the good
loving's gone ♪
1487
01:28:03,379 --> 01:28:07,047
♪ I tried to understand
1488
01:28:08,583 --> 01:28:12,486
♪ But a man can only
take so much, girl ♪
1489
01:28:21,329 --> 01:28:26,466
♪ Hey, baby!
1490
01:28:38,713 --> 01:28:40,614
♪ Come on
1491
01:28:45,953 --> 01:28:49,856
♪ If you're looking
for me baby ♪
1492
01:28:49,858 --> 01:28:53,760
♪ I'll be roaming
in the streets ♪
1493
01:28:53,762 --> 01:28:57,564
♪ Be roaming
in the street, baby ♪
1494
01:28:57,566 --> 01:29:00,567
♪ Come on
1495
01:30:09,971 --> 01:30:13,039
It's fuckin' slow, man.