1 00:00:43,813 --> 00:00:44,848 Okay, welcome back. 2 00:00:45,048 --> 00:00:47,494 This is Artie Decker, De Voice of the Fresno Grizzlies... 3 00:00:47,684 --> 00:00:49,459 and we've got a good one, my friends. 4 00:00:49,853 --> 00:00:52,834 Top of the ninth here at Chukchansi Park, and a beautiful night. 5 00:00:52,923 --> 00:00:55,301 We can actually feel that fall is finally an its way. 6 00:00:55,492 --> 00:00:59,338 It's a rather crisp 107 degrees, but dry. 7 00:00:59,529 --> 00:01:02,806 We've got 15,000 sweaty and bloated people all pumped up on Churros... 8 00:01:02,999 --> 00:01:05,104 rooting on our Fresno Grizzlies. 9 00:01:05,302 --> 00:01:08,613 And Brad, this is why I love announcing Minor League Baseball... 10 00:01:08,805 --> 00:01:11,045 because I get to say names like "River Cats..." 11 00:01:11,240 --> 00:01:12,981 or the "Rancho Cucamonga Quakes." 12 00:01:13,175 --> 00:01:15,086 I don't have to ever say boring names 13 00:01:15,177 --> 00:01:17,282 like "Tigers," or "Red Sox," or "Cubs." 14 00:01:17,846 --> 00:01:19,566 Okay, we got a little break in the action... 15 00:01:19,582 --> 00:01:21,562 as they're having a little meeting on the mound. 16 00:01:21,750 --> 00:01:23,787 Artie, do you know what time it is? 17 00:01:23,986 --> 00:01:28,833 I sure do, Brad. It's time for Artie's Kiss Cam! 18 00:01:30,526 --> 00:01:32,767 Thank you, Gwen. 19 00:01:32,962 --> 00:01:34,407 Let's see what kind of young lovers 20 00:01:34,496 --> 00:01:35,873 we got at the ballpark tonight. 21 00:01:36,065 --> 00:01:37,373 All right, there's a kiss. 22 00:01:37,566 --> 00:01:39,046 Well, you know one thing when you see 23 00:01:39,134 --> 00:01:41,045 a kiss like that, they're married. 24 00:01:41,237 --> 00:01:43,148 Wait, wait, we've got a proposal. 25 00:01:43,339 --> 00:01:45,979 "Will you marry me, Clara? Love, Nate." 26 00:01:46,175 --> 00:01:49,645 There's our young Romeo now. And He has scored! 27 00:01:49,845 --> 00:01:52,126 Brad, that is what you young people would call a "hottie." 28 00:01:52,681 --> 00:01:55,161 He's got Britney Spears and he's about to give her the ring... 29 00:01:55,351 --> 00:01:57,160 and he goes the other way! 30 00:01:57,353 --> 00:01:59,458 I can't believe what I am seeing... 31 00:01:59,655 --> 00:02:03,124 and I'm sure she's got a great "personality," but, oh my. 32 00:02:03,424 --> 00:02:05,131 I thought Jerry Garcia was dead. 33 00:02:05,326 --> 00:02:07,670 What's he doing in the stands marrying him? 34 00:02:07,862 --> 00:02:11,605 Here at Chukchansi Park, love is blind, and apparently so is Nate. 35 00:02:11,799 --> 00:02:13,904 All right, let's get back to the action 36 00:02:14,068 --> 00:02:16,207 as the meeting breaks up on the mound. 37 00:02:16,404 --> 00:02:18,975 Here's the situation. First and third, two outs. 38 00:02:19,474 --> 00:02:20,885 And here's the pitch. 39 00:02:21,075 --> 00:02:22,816 Swing and a miss. Diaz fires down to third. 40 00:02:23,011 --> 00:02:23,819 They've picked him off third! 41 00:02:24,012 --> 00:02:26,288 - You're out! - Ballgame aver! 42 00:02:26,481 --> 00:02:28,518 I'll tell you, Myers is getting an earful... 43 00:02:28,716 --> 00:02:31,788 and as my mom used to say, "There's no cure for dumb." 44 00:02:32,487 --> 00:02:34,330 Gwen! We won. 45 00:02:34,522 --> 00:02:36,502 And that closes out the last game of the season. 46 00:02:36,691 --> 00:02:39,137 The Grizzlies take the Sacramento River Cats... 47 00:02:39,327 --> 00:02:40,738 by a score of three to one. 48 00:02:40,928 --> 00:02:43,340 We'll be right back with a happy recap. 49 00:02:43,865 --> 00:02:46,505 That is a bad way to end a game. 50 00:02:46,701 --> 00:02:49,341 Artie. Mr. Decker. 51 00:02:50,104 --> 00:02:54,985 I want to say thank you for what has been an awesome semester. 52 00:02:55,176 --> 00:02:59,487 I mean, you taught me a lot, and... I got you this. 53 00:02:59,680 --> 00:03:00,658 What did you do, Brad? 54 00:03:00,847 --> 00:03:03,225 It's got all the famous calls you told me about. 55 00:03:03,417 --> 00:03:06,023 Harwell, "Red" Barber, Scully, Russ Hodges. 56 00:03:06,219 --> 00:03:08,380 You know, that's really great, Brad. Thank you so much. 57 00:03:09,790 --> 00:03:11,167 Well, as the great Yogi Berra once said, 58 00:03:11,325 --> 00:03:12,736 "It ain't over till it's over." 59 00:03:12,926 --> 00:03:15,065 Well, this Fresno Grizzlies season is over. 60 00:03:15,262 --> 00:03:18,266 I'm Artie Decker, De Voice of the Fresno Grizzlies. 61 00:03:18,465 --> 00:03:21,605 So, on behalf of Brad Zolick and the late Gwen Foster on the organ... 62 00:03:21,802 --> 00:03:25,750 good night everybody, thanks for listening and lights out, Alice. 63 00:03:27,374 --> 00:03:28,876 I love this job. 64 00:03:30,944 --> 00:03:32,184 I'm fired? 65 00:03:32,379 --> 00:03:35,053 I'm sorry, Artie. I'm changing everything. 66 00:03:35,248 --> 00:03:38,092 New logos, new uniforms, new music. 67 00:03:38,285 --> 00:03:40,045 All the deadwood is floating to the sawmill. 68 00:03:40,087 --> 00:03:41,031 I'm deadwood? 69 00:03:41,121 --> 00:03:43,533 You're old school. You reminisce and you tell stories. 70 00:03:43,724 --> 00:03:45,431 All our sponsors are for hearing aids, 71 00:03:45,592 --> 00:03:47,299 beds that go up and down, and scooters. 72 00:03:47,494 --> 00:03:49,473 Not the cool kind, the sad kind. 73 00:03:49,962 --> 00:03:51,202 We need someone who's wired in. 74 00:03:51,297 --> 00:03:51,968 To what? 75 00:03:52,164 --> 00:03:53,302 Facebook. 76 00:03:53,499 --> 00:03:55,035 - How many friends do you have? - I don't have any friends. 77 00:03:55,234 --> 00:03:56,269 - Have you made any posts? - No. 78 00:03:56,469 --> 00:03:57,743 - What was your last update? - My what? 79 00:03:57,937 --> 00:03:59,280 - Have you poked anybody? - I haven't poked anybody! 80 00:03:59,472 --> 00:04:00,746 - Has anybody poked you? - No. 81 00:04:00,940 --> 00:04:02,920 The thing is Artie, even if you were connected... 82 00:04:03,109 --> 00:04:04,910 I don't know that I'd want to be poked by you. 83 00:04:04,944 --> 00:04:06,287 - How many apps do you have? - I don't have any apps. 84 00:04:06,479 --> 00:04:07,457 - You don't have any apps? - No. 85 00:04:07,646 --> 00:04:08,716 - Everyone has apps. - I don't have an app. 86 00:04:08,914 --> 00:04:10,052 - Do you play Angry Birds? - Angry Birds? 87 00:04:10,149 --> 00:04:11,127 Who's your favorite Angry Bird? 88 00:04:11,217 --> 00:04:12,218 I don't have a favorite Angry Bird! 89 00:04:12,318 --> 00:04:13,296 Everyone has a favorite Angry Bird. 90 00:04:13,386 --> 00:04:14,786 I don't have a favorite Angry Bird! 91 00:04:14,787 --> 00:04:15,891 Hashtag. 92 00:04:16,088 --> 00:04:17,608 When was the last time you hashtagged? 93 00:04:17,656 --> 00:04:19,397 Are you out of your mind? What the heck are you talking about? 94 00:04:19,592 --> 00:04:20,570 We need announcers that tweet. 95 00:04:20,760 --> 00:04:22,561 I'll tweet. I'll make whatever noise you want. 96 00:04:22,628 --> 00:04:25,802 Sorry, Artie, my mind's made up. 97 00:05:00,965 --> 00:05:02,808 Feel the burn, everyone. 98 00:05:03,001 --> 00:05:05,208 And one, two, three, four. 99 00:05:05,403 --> 00:05:06,177 Okay, okay. 100 00:05:06,471 --> 00:05:07,711 How are we doing, Diane? 101 00:05:07,906 --> 00:05:09,943 Oh, my sciatica. 102 00:05:10,141 --> 00:05:11,552 My other sciatica. 103 00:05:16,414 --> 00:05:18,223 Ten minutes to cheesecake, ladies. 104 00:05:19,584 --> 00:05:20,790 There we go. Good job. 105 00:05:20,985 --> 00:05:22,487 Hi, Artie. 106 00:05:22,687 --> 00:05:24,360 Hi, ladies. 107 00:05:24,556 --> 00:05:25,694 Caught the end of the game. 108 00:05:26,357 --> 00:05:28,667 "No cure for dumb." Funny. 109 00:05:28,860 --> 00:05:30,737 - Yeah. - Funny. 110 00:05:32,630 --> 00:05:33,631 Don't fall, hon. 111 00:05:33,832 --> 00:05:35,310 I got it. 112 00:05:35,899 --> 00:05:37,708 All right, everybody, pull your core in. 113 00:05:38,168 --> 00:05:39,806 I don't have a core. 114 00:05:40,003 --> 00:05:41,641 Work those abs. 115 00:05:45,309 --> 00:05:48,620 You know, Artie, this could turn out to be a good thing. 116 00:05:48,812 --> 00:05:50,519 It could give us more "us" time. 117 00:05:50,714 --> 00:05:54,059 You mean me wearing a captain's hat following you around Costco? 118 00:05:54,685 --> 00:05:56,289 You don't want to retire? Fine. 119 00:05:56,487 --> 00:05:59,491 You were offered a job teaching broadcasting at Fresno State. 120 00:05:59,690 --> 00:06:00,964 You could teach young people. 121 00:06:01,158 --> 00:06:02,959 I could, but why should they know what I know? 122 00:06:04,027 --> 00:06:05,301 Ever the nurturer. 123 00:06:05,496 --> 00:06:08,500 I don't want to teach, I want to do. I still have the dream. 124 00:06:08,699 --> 00:06:09,541 The Giants? 125 00:06:09,733 --> 00:06:12,737 Yeah, the Giants. I've been chasing this job for 35 years. 126 00:06:12,903 --> 00:06:14,746 You give up your dream, you give up. 127 00:06:15,005 --> 00:06:15,983 I'm not quitting. 128 00:06:16,173 --> 00:06:17,743 I feel 10 years younger than I am, 129 00:06:17,908 --> 00:06:19,478 and I look 10 years younger than that. 130 00:06:19,676 --> 00:06:22,486 So basically, you're asking a 38-year-old to retire. 131 00:06:22,679 --> 00:06:24,590 You're 38? Paint the house. 132 00:06:25,782 --> 00:06:29,058 Artie, to me, you're the best announcer in the whole world. 133 00:06:29,252 --> 00:06:31,528 You should be broadcasting for the Giants. 134 00:06:31,721 --> 00:06:33,928 But after all these years, honey... 135 00:06:34,123 --> 00:06:36,203 something tells me they don't have you on speed dial. 136 00:06:39,695 --> 00:06:42,369 - It'll be okay. - I'm sorry. 137 00:06:48,137 --> 00:06:50,276 H-life awake. 138 00:06:50,473 --> 00:06:54,421 Garage activated. Vehicle charging. 139 00:06:54,610 --> 00:06:57,056 Solar panels activated. 140 00:06:57,246 --> 00:07:00,921 Good morning, Harper, Turner and Barker. 141 00:07:01,117 --> 00:07:02,528 Waffles ready. 142 00:07:03,753 --> 00:07:04,754 Coffee ready. 143 00:07:05,588 --> 00:07:07,568 Time for breakfast. 144 00:07:07,757 --> 00:07:09,293 But-but, Mom. 145 00:07:09,492 --> 00:07:11,870 Honey, hold on one second. 146 00:07:11,961 --> 00:07:15,909 Well, I can have that up for you in about three hours. 147 00:07:16,766 --> 00:07:20,235 Yeah, one hour, that's what I meant. Sure, I can hold on. 148 00:07:20,435 --> 00:07:21,243 Stupid! 149 00:07:21,436 --> 00:07:23,382 - What's the matter, honey? - I missed a note. 150 00:07:23,572 --> 00:07:25,452 Come and have breakfast. You're going to get it. 151 00:07:25,507 --> 00:07:26,713 You know that you always do. 152 00:07:26,908 --> 00:07:28,114 Yeah, I'm right here. 153 00:07:28,310 --> 00:07:30,654 Right. And when would that be? 154 00:07:30,845 --> 00:07:32,825 That's so soon. You got to be kidding me. 155 00:07:33,014 --> 00:07:34,152 Dad! Dad. 156 00:07:34,349 --> 00:07:36,659 I'm the soysages, Turner gets the Wheatie-O's. 157 00:07:36,851 --> 00:07:39,457 Okay. Hey, babe, can you take over here? 158 00:07:39,654 --> 00:07:40,934 - I'm on a call. - I'm on a call. 159 00:07:40,956 --> 00:07:42,458 Thank you. 160 00:07:42,958 --> 00:07:47,930 But-but M-Mom! Th-The other k-kids are gonna w-watch them. 161 00:07:49,097 --> 00:07:51,475 Honey, I don't think you'd really enjoy the Saw movies. 162 00:07:51,666 --> 00:07:52,770 Remember when we went to see Avatar... 163 00:07:52,968 --> 00:07:54,248 and you spent the last two hours 164 00:07:54,302 --> 00:07:55,542 with your head inside my purse? 165 00:07:55,670 --> 00:07:57,843 I-I-I was l-looking for the gum. 166 00:07:58,306 --> 00:07:59,410 I'm right here. 167 00:08:01,209 --> 00:08:02,779 I can't believe it. My computer just crashed. 168 00:08:02,944 --> 00:08:04,446 I'll have to call you right back. 169 00:08:04,646 --> 00:08:07,593 Barker, can we discuss some of the many other possibilities... 170 00:08:07,782 --> 00:08:10,991 for today's wardrobe, including some involving pants? 171 00:08:11,186 --> 00:08:12,987 Honey, can I talk to you outside for a second? 172 00:08:13,053 --> 00:08:16,034 Sure. I have nothing but time. 173 00:08:17,057 --> 00:08:20,266 D-Dad? C-Can I watch the Saw movies? 174 00:08:20,461 --> 00:08:21,269 Sure. 175 00:08:21,462 --> 00:08:23,169 Yeah! 176 00:08:23,364 --> 00:08:26,140 Wait. That's way inappropriate. 177 00:08:28,569 --> 00:08:29,843 What's up? 178 00:08:34,141 --> 00:08:35,814 That was nice. Like a little mini date. 179 00:08:36,010 --> 00:08:36,988 Crazy year, right? 180 00:08:37,177 --> 00:08:39,817 I mean, the whole thing. Moving to Atlanta for my job. 181 00:08:40,014 --> 00:08:41,618 Yeah, it's had its challenges. 182 00:08:41,815 --> 00:08:44,056 Well, guess what. That was my boss on the phone... 183 00:08:44,251 --> 00:08:45,855 and the H-life has been nominated 184 00:08:45,953 --> 00:08:48,331 for "Best New Product of the Year." 185 00:08:51,325 --> 00:08:52,303 That's fantastic! 186 00:08:52,493 --> 00:08:54,973 I know! They're flying us both next week. 187 00:08:55,162 --> 00:08:58,575 Five days of lectures and networking and love. 188 00:08:59,199 --> 00:09:00,701 Saturday is Harper's audition. 189 00:09:00,901 --> 00:09:01,879 Yeah, but it's at night. 190 00:09:02,069 --> 00:09:03,509 We'll fly back early. We'll make it. 191 00:09:03,537 --> 00:09:04,845 Also, Turner has speech therapy. 192 00:09:05,039 --> 00:09:06,449 I have to buy Harper a dress for the audition. 193 00:09:06,639 --> 00:09:08,050 We're supposed to take the kids to the symphony... 194 00:09:08,241 --> 00:09:10,881 Honey, we haven't had a vacation since Barker was born. 195 00:09:11,077 --> 00:09:13,182 That's five years. 196 00:09:13,279 --> 00:09:15,953 This conversation is the longest we've been alone in months. 197 00:09:16,149 --> 00:09:18,720 So, great. I'll call my parents, they'll fly down. 198 00:09:18,918 --> 00:09:21,421 They'll be happy to watch the kids while we're gone. 199 00:09:26,225 --> 00:09:28,603 A cruise. What cruise? 200 00:09:28,795 --> 00:09:31,469 The one that we bought them for their 40th anniversary. 201 00:09:31,664 --> 00:09:33,871 I said just get them matching tracksuits. 202 00:09:34,067 --> 00:09:36,809 Look, we'll figure something out, okay? 203 00:09:37,770 --> 00:09:41,240 Well, we could always call your parents. 204 00:09:48,414 --> 00:09:49,392 Oh, you're serious. 205 00:09:49,582 --> 00:09:52,791 Yeah. They haven't seen the kids in what, a year? 206 00:09:53,586 --> 00:09:56,590 Ten months is not quite a year. 207 00:09:57,290 --> 00:09:58,098 Call them. 208 00:10:04,529 --> 00:10:06,440 - They're not coming. - Don't you need to talk to them first? 209 00:10:06,631 --> 00:10:09,510 You know that they're just going to say that they can't make it. 210 00:10:10,268 --> 00:10:11,440 What? What? 211 00:10:12,370 --> 00:10:13,508 - What? - The itch. 212 00:10:13,705 --> 00:10:16,276 You're kidding. You're getting your "Artie and Diane Rash"? 213 00:10:16,475 --> 00:10:19,581 Have you forgotten how they disapprove of the way that we parent? 214 00:10:19,778 --> 00:10:24,022 My father doesn't listen. My mother, she's a tornado with lipstick. 215 00:10:24,549 --> 00:10:27,189 Alice, we need this vacation. 216 00:10:27,385 --> 00:10:28,455 And as you know... 217 00:10:29,588 --> 00:10:33,297 who's going to be with you in the Hilton Head? 218 00:10:34,559 --> 00:10:35,503 Nigel? 219 00:10:35,694 --> 00:10:36,672 That's right. 220 00:10:37,329 --> 00:10:40,640 In fact, have you heard me new song? 221 00:10:41,767 --> 00:10:45,806 I'm gonna lave you till the police come 222 00:10:47,572 --> 00:10:50,212 Anything for you, Nigel. 223 00:10:52,343 --> 00:10:54,653 Carl flushed my pillow down the toilet. 224 00:10:54,845 --> 00:10:57,519 Toilet overflowing. Bathroom flooded. 225 00:10:57,715 --> 00:11:00,389 Okay, I'll call my parents. 226 00:11:06,123 --> 00:11:08,763 Artie, pick up the phone! 227 00:11:10,561 --> 00:11:12,097 What are you doing? 228 00:11:12,296 --> 00:11:14,606 I can't hear you, the phone's ringing. 229 00:11:15,733 --> 00:11:16,711 - Hello? - Hi, Dad. 230 00:11:16,901 --> 00:11:18,676 - Alice, how are you? - Is Mom around? 231 00:11:18,869 --> 00:11:20,849 Yeah, hold on, I'll get her. 232 00:11:21,038 --> 00:11:21,914 Your daughter. 233 00:11:22,106 --> 00:11:23,066 Put her on speakerphone. 234 00:11:23,207 --> 00:11:25,016 Don't tell her I was fired. 235 00:11:27,645 --> 00:11:29,056 - Oh, my. - I got it. 236 00:11:29,246 --> 00:11:30,384 - Put her on hold. - I know. 237 00:11:30,581 --> 00:11:31,525 - Put her on hold. - I'm trying. 238 00:11:31,715 --> 00:11:32,625 - Put her on hold. - I can't. 239 00:11:32,817 --> 00:11:34,262 - Put her on hold. - You're making me tense. 240 00:11:34,451 --> 00:11:35,486 Now, put her on hold. 241 00:11:35,653 --> 00:11:36,723 It's right there. 242 00:11:36,921 --> 00:11:38,298 I'm gonna start a fire, here. 243 00:11:38,556 --> 00:11:40,729 Hi, Alice, what's going on? 244 00:11:40,925 --> 00:11:45,395 Well, now that you ask... 245 00:11:46,596 --> 00:11:49,941 Phil has to go away next week and I'd really like to go with him. 246 00:11:50,133 --> 00:11:51,908 And we need someone to watch the kids, 247 00:11:52,068 --> 00:11:53,843 so I was wandering, would you want ta? 248 00:11:54,037 --> 00:11:55,516 No. No. 249 00:11:55,872 --> 00:11:57,283 We'd love to! 250 00:11:57,607 --> 00:11:59,018 Listen, I'm cooking dinner. 251 00:11:59,209 --> 00:12:01,746 I'll call you back in a little bit for the details. 252 00:12:02,645 --> 00:12:03,680 She said yes. 253 00:12:03,880 --> 00:12:04,790 You said yes. 254 00:12:04,981 --> 00:12:07,018 Artie, we practically never see our grandchildren. 255 00:12:07,217 --> 00:12:08,287 We've never seen their new house. 256 00:12:08,484 --> 00:12:09,792 They've never been to Fresno. 257 00:12:09,986 --> 00:12:11,590 I just got fired. I'm licking my wounds. 258 00:12:11,788 --> 00:12:13,199 I'll lick them. Come on! 259 00:12:13,389 --> 00:12:14,800 They need someone to take care of the kids. 260 00:12:14,991 --> 00:12:16,334 Can't the house do it? 261 00:12:17,193 --> 00:12:18,695 We have one child. 262 00:12:18,895 --> 00:12:22,342 These three kids are the only grandchildren we're ever going to have. 263 00:12:23,533 --> 00:12:26,946 I'm awkward around those kids. I don't think they like me. 264 00:12:27,470 --> 00:12:29,848 Honey, they don't see you enough. 265 00:12:30,039 --> 00:12:32,542 They have to know you better before they don't like you. 266 00:12:33,042 --> 00:12:35,989 No, but it's a real thing, Di. And it all comes from Alice. 267 00:12:36,179 --> 00:12:37,714 Like the last time, the little one left the house... 268 00:12:37,913 --> 00:12:39,193 wearing flippers and a bathrobe. 269 00:12:39,248 --> 00:12:42,661 Sol made a little joke. I said, "This one, any hope for normal?" 270 00:12:42,851 --> 00:12:45,127 And I got this withering gaze. 271 00:12:45,320 --> 00:12:46,492 Like you're giving me now. 272 00:12:46,688 --> 00:12:48,668 Well, first of all... 273 00:12:48,857 --> 00:12:51,861 it might be a good thing if you learned "the little one's" name. 274 00:12:52,060 --> 00:12:53,061 It's Barker. 275 00:12:56,732 --> 00:12:57,710 Di. 276 00:12:58,500 --> 00:13:01,413 Listen to me, I'm fragile right now. 277 00:13:01,603 --> 00:13:02,673 I need a job. 278 00:13:02,871 --> 00:13:05,408 I don't need Alice's disapproval. I'm not going. 279 00:13:05,607 --> 00:13:07,712 - You're going. - That's what I meant. 280 00:13:10,012 --> 00:13:11,719 Her whole way of raising her kids is a giant... 281 00:13:11,813 --> 00:13:13,520 in our face. 282 00:13:14,182 --> 00:13:16,321 It's her generation. It's just their way. 283 00:13:17,719 --> 00:13:19,392 Hey, what are you looking for, sailor? 284 00:13:19,588 --> 00:13:22,535 If you haven't found it yet, it's not there. I'll help you out. 285 00:13:26,028 --> 00:13:27,735 - Come on! - He's not done groping. 286 00:13:29,398 --> 00:13:31,604 And could she have found anyone less like me to marry? 287 00:13:32,099 --> 00:13:34,841 What's your problem with Phil? He's such a sweet guy. 288 00:13:35,036 --> 00:13:37,539 He is sweet. I think he breastfed the kids. 289 00:13:38,239 --> 00:13:39,513 Perfect, it's raining. 290 00:13:39,707 --> 00:13:41,827 Scattered showers, honey. It'll be over in 20 minutes. 291 00:13:41,976 --> 00:13:42,954 It's an omen. 292 00:13:43,144 --> 00:13:45,090 - What's it an omen of? - Impending doom. 293 00:13:45,279 --> 00:13:47,054 - I have a great idea. - What's that? 294 00:13:47,248 --> 00:13:48,090 Shut up! 295 00:13:48,582 --> 00:13:49,890 I'll think about it. 296 00:13:50,952 --> 00:13:52,932 - You know what grandparenting is? - What? 297 00:13:53,120 --> 00:13:54,258 A second chance. 298 00:13:56,490 --> 00:13:58,401 That's pretty good. 299 00:13:58,592 --> 00:14:00,232 - And you know what Alice told me? - What? 300 00:14:00,294 --> 00:14:03,434 The kids are over-the-moon excited about our coming. 301 00:14:03,631 --> 00:14:04,541 Why them? 302 00:14:04,732 --> 00:14:06,575 Because they're your grandparents and they love you. 303 00:14:06,767 --> 00:14:08,769 D-Do we have to wear these? 304 00:14:09,303 --> 00:14:13,547 Well, Grandma made them. And she thinks you like them. 305 00:14:13,941 --> 00:14:15,420 Why would she think that? 306 00:14:16,477 --> 00:14:17,888 Because I told her that you did. 307 00:14:18,079 --> 00:14:21,492 Look, it's going to be okay. I promise you. 308 00:14:21,682 --> 00:14:23,422 You know, they're very funny. 309 00:14:23,650 --> 00:14:25,926 Grandpa tells lots of jokes... 310 00:14:26,152 --> 00:14:27,790 that you won't get. 311 00:14:28,288 --> 00:14:30,768 So just laugh. 312 00:14:30,957 --> 00:14:34,837 Just laugh and I promise you we'll get through this week. 313 00:14:35,328 --> 00:14:37,501 Remember, Mama loves you very much. 314 00:14:41,468 --> 00:14:43,141 They're here! 315 00:14:45,805 --> 00:14:47,182 Oh, no. 316 00:14:52,178 --> 00:14:53,350 Hi! 317 00:14:53,546 --> 00:14:54,456 Hi! 318 00:14:54,647 --> 00:14:55,853 This is a McStadium. 319 00:14:56,049 --> 00:14:57,585 Hey, thanks for coming. 320 00:14:57,784 --> 00:14:58,592 Hello, Phil. 321 00:14:58,785 --> 00:15:01,459 Oh, my goodness! They're wearing their shirts. 322 00:15:01,654 --> 00:15:03,930 I told you, they love those shirts! 323 00:15:04,124 --> 00:15:05,501 Give me a kiss. 324 00:15:08,528 --> 00:15:09,973 I'm so excited. 325 00:15:10,163 --> 00:15:12,165 This one's gonna be prettier than her grandma. 326 00:15:12,365 --> 00:15:13,776 - Harper. - I know. 327 00:15:13,967 --> 00:15:15,946 How's the fiddle coming? Still fiddling? 328 00:15:16,301 --> 00:15:17,473 Hello, boys, still single? 329 00:15:21,707 --> 00:15:22,788 Mom, you brought groceries? 330 00:15:22,975 --> 00:15:23,919 You know Dad. 331 00:15:24,109 --> 00:15:26,248 He just wanted to make sure you had food here for him. 332 00:15:26,445 --> 00:15:28,618 Okay, and toilet paper? 333 00:15:28,814 --> 00:15:31,488 Well, I know what I like. Aloe. 334 00:15:32,551 --> 00:15:34,258 Are those for us? 335 00:15:34,453 --> 00:15:35,989 Those are definitely for you! 336 00:15:36,188 --> 00:15:38,134 Yep. One for each of you. 337 00:15:38,323 --> 00:15:40,030 Here you go. And for you. 338 00:15:40,225 --> 00:15:42,671 S-Super Squirters! Awesome! 339 00:15:42,861 --> 00:15:43,771 You bought them guns. 340 00:15:43,962 --> 00:15:44,872 Yeah. 341 00:15:45,064 --> 00:15:47,977 Dad. We don't do guns. 342 00:15:48,200 --> 00:15:51,443 Hey, if you think that's something, wait until you see this. 343 00:15:51,637 --> 00:15:53,708 This is classic Artie. 344 00:15:55,674 --> 00:15:58,484 Artie Decker bobbleheads. 345 00:15:58,677 --> 00:15:59,883 Here you go. Look at this? 346 00:16:00,079 --> 00:16:01,183 What do you say? 347 00:16:01,380 --> 00:16:03,621 That's creepy. Make it stop! 348 00:16:05,317 --> 00:16:06,387 Thank you, Grandpa. 349 00:16:06,585 --> 00:16:07,893 Th-Thank you, G-Grandpa. 350 00:16:08,086 --> 00:16:10,794 Hey, you know what? Since we're all gonna be pals now... 351 00:16:10,988 --> 00:16:14,663 instead of calling me "Grandpa," why don't you call me "Artie"? 352 00:16:14,859 --> 00:16:17,863 So it's "Grandma and Artie" now? What are you, my boyfriend? 353 00:16:18,062 --> 00:16:19,564 No, listen. We went through all those names last time. 354 00:16:19,764 --> 00:16:21,869 I don't want to be "Mup-Mup," or "Bup-Bup," or "Boop-Boop." 355 00:16:22,066 --> 00:16:23,170 Those are puppet names. 356 00:16:23,334 --> 00:16:26,577 My name is Artie. Always been Artie. Call me Artie. 357 00:16:26,771 --> 00:16:28,580 Can I call you "Farty"? 358 00:16:29,173 --> 00:16:30,516 That's not a name, dope. 359 00:16:30,708 --> 00:16:34,212 Hey, that was a put-down. You owe me three put-ups. 360 00:16:34,745 --> 00:16:37,089 I like your shoes. I like your shirt. I like your hair. 361 00:16:37,281 --> 00:16:38,055 Let's go inside. 362 00:16:38,249 --> 00:16:39,284 You guys all have to change because 363 00:16:39,450 --> 00:16:40,485 we're going out for dinner. Come on. 364 00:16:40,685 --> 00:16:41,993 Get the bags, Farty. 365 00:16:46,557 --> 00:16:48,264 Alice, this is a beautiful house. 366 00:16:48,459 --> 00:16:49,369 Thank you. 367 00:16:49,560 --> 00:16:51,096 - It's a prototype. - Prototype? 368 00:16:51,295 --> 00:16:55,209 Welcome, Alice and Phil and Harper and Turner and Barker and... 369 00:16:56,400 --> 00:16:58,004 two unidentified guests. 370 00:16:58,202 --> 00:16:59,272 But that's not strange. 371 00:16:59,470 --> 00:17:00,278 It's the H-life. 372 00:17:00,471 --> 00:17:03,007 It's Phil's invention. It's what he's worked on all this time. 373 00:17:04,207 --> 00:17:07,086 This is the brain center to this fully automated... 374 00:17:07,277 --> 00:17:09,450 voice-activated, prototype smart house. 375 00:17:09,646 --> 00:17:12,092 And I'm just going to enter you two into the system right now. 376 00:17:12,282 --> 00:17:13,522 All right. 377 00:17:14,951 --> 00:17:16,453 Beam me up. 378 00:17:16,653 --> 00:17:17,927 You all get these portables... 379 00:17:18,121 --> 00:17:21,591 and if there are any problems, Turner understands the whole system. 380 00:17:21,992 --> 00:17:22,868 Turner does? 381 00:17:23,059 --> 00:17:25,198 Well, if Turner can do it, I certainly can't. 382 00:17:26,763 --> 00:17:28,606 Alice, this is so beautiful. 383 00:17:29,166 --> 00:17:31,612 How's work, Dad? How's your season? 384 00:17:31,801 --> 00:17:34,247 Very good. Yeah, we had a good season. 385 00:17:34,437 --> 00:17:35,939 Yeah, a lot of good kids. 386 00:17:36,139 --> 00:17:37,777 You know, your dad still signs off 387 00:17:37,941 --> 00:17:39,579 every broadcast, "Lights out, Alice." 388 00:17:39,776 --> 00:17:41,722 - Really? - Yeah. 389 00:17:42,012 --> 00:17:43,373 See, when Alice was a little girl, 390 00:17:43,446 --> 00:17:44,754 I wasn't home a lot to put her to bed... 391 00:17:44,948 --> 00:17:46,393 so on the radio I would say... 392 00:17:46,583 --> 00:17:50,053 "Lights out, Alice," and it sort of stuck, you know? 393 00:17:50,487 --> 00:17:51,397 That's really nice. 394 00:17:51,555 --> 00:17:52,465 Yeah. 395 00:17:53,256 --> 00:17:54,256 I thought so. 396 00:17:54,924 --> 00:17:55,925 What's this? 397 00:17:57,159 --> 00:17:58,399 It's some photos. 398 00:18:02,298 --> 00:18:03,777 Pipi and Papi look great. 399 00:18:04,967 --> 00:18:05,809 Yeah. 400 00:18:06,001 --> 00:18:07,571 Here you are. 401 00:18:07,736 --> 00:18:09,306 Oh, yeah. 402 00:18:09,505 --> 00:18:10,677 I took that picture! 403 00:18:10,839 --> 00:18:12,045 That was a great day, yeah. 404 00:18:12,241 --> 00:18:13,879 Farty wet his pants! 405 00:18:14,076 --> 00:18:16,147 Barker, indoor voice. 406 00:18:16,478 --> 00:18:19,459 Farty wet his pants! Farty wet his pants! 407 00:18:22,751 --> 00:18:23,923 Guns. 408 00:18:24,119 --> 00:18:25,462 Guns. 409 00:18:28,857 --> 00:18:31,337 That's so hot! What are you doing? It's too hot! 410 00:18:31,527 --> 00:18:34,064 Here, do it yourself. 411 00:18:35,364 --> 00:18:37,173 What's the matter? 412 00:18:39,068 --> 00:18:41,014 - Do you realize what we are? - What? 413 00:18:41,370 --> 00:18:42,940 We're the "other" grandparents. 414 00:18:43,138 --> 00:18:44,549 We can't be all four. 415 00:18:44,740 --> 00:18:45,946 I'm serious. 416 00:18:46,141 --> 00:18:47,462 They have their real grandparents 417 00:18:47,609 --> 00:18:48,952 that they love and put up on the mantle... 418 00:18:49,143 --> 00:18:51,020 and then there's us. 419 00:18:51,212 --> 00:18:53,522 And who's putting those pictures on the mantle? 420 00:18:53,715 --> 00:18:57,253 Our daughter. She is not sticking up for us. 421 00:18:57,452 --> 00:19:00,592 I don't think the kids even know what I do. Or did. 422 00:19:00,788 --> 00:19:02,324 Look, Artie, I know you're upset 423 00:19:02,523 --> 00:19:04,127 about getting kicked in your career... 424 00:19:04,325 --> 00:19:05,895 but we need to focus, buddy. 425 00:19:06,094 --> 00:19:07,732 Our grandchildren are going to love me. 426 00:19:07,929 --> 00:19:09,909 - What about me? - That's your problem. 427 00:19:18,940 --> 00:19:20,942 Welcome! 428 00:19:25,546 --> 00:19:27,048 - New people. - Hello. 429 00:19:27,248 --> 00:19:29,125 These are my parents. They're going to watch the kids this week. 430 00:19:29,317 --> 00:19:30,887 Welcome to Healthy Tiger. 431 00:19:31,085 --> 00:19:33,190 All healthy Pan Asian food. 432 00:19:33,388 --> 00:19:34,093 What's that? 433 00:19:34,289 --> 00:19:36,530 No MSG, no gluten, no sodium. 434 00:19:36,724 --> 00:19:38,897 Just healthy food. 435 00:19:40,727 --> 00:19:42,104 I'm drooling already. 436 00:19:42,296 --> 00:19:44,298 Pan Asian, just like me! 437 00:19:44,498 --> 00:19:45,806 My mother's Japanese, my father's Chinese... 438 00:19:45,999 --> 00:19:48,479 my kids are Korean and they go to Hebrew day school. 439 00:19:48,669 --> 00:19:50,410 Oy vey 440 00:19:50,604 --> 00:19:52,413 Come on. Yeah! 441 00:19:52,606 --> 00:19:55,280 How do you ruin Chinese food? 442 00:19:55,809 --> 00:19:56,981 Okay. 443 00:19:58,412 --> 00:19:59,789 We seem to have an empty chair. 444 00:19:59,980 --> 00:20:01,220 No, no, that chair is for Carl. 445 00:20:01,248 --> 00:20:03,057 - Who's Carl? - Barker's friend. 446 00:20:03,250 --> 00:20:04,593 How nice. When's he coming? 447 00:20:04,785 --> 00:20:06,093 He's already here. 448 00:20:06,286 --> 00:20:08,391 Hi, Carl. You look great. 449 00:20:08,588 --> 00:20:10,158 Did you get a haircut? 450 00:20:11,625 --> 00:20:12,603 Tell him. 451 00:20:13,493 --> 00:20:16,303 Carl is Barker's imaginary friend. 452 00:20:16,496 --> 00:20:17,804 He's a kangaroo. 453 00:20:18,532 --> 00:20:20,172 Maybe we should have eaten at the Outback. 454 00:20:26,807 --> 00:20:28,616 Kids, go wash your hands. 455 00:20:28,942 --> 00:20:31,718 Come on, Carl. 456 00:20:31,912 --> 00:20:33,720 Bye, Farty. 457 00:20:34,914 --> 00:20:36,757 He's in a real "testing the boundaries" phase. 458 00:20:36,949 --> 00:20:39,828 Plus, he's also a little constipated. 459 00:20:40,453 --> 00:20:41,733 Now, you're talking my language. 460 00:20:41,754 --> 00:20:43,631 I have some stuff that will blow his mind. 461 00:20:43,823 --> 00:20:45,343 They used it to blast out the Chunnel. 462 00:20:45,458 --> 00:20:46,960 Thank you, Lord Arthur. 463 00:20:47,159 --> 00:20:49,298 Now, do you have any special instructions for us? 464 00:20:49,495 --> 00:20:51,615 Like, what the kids like to do, what they like to eat. 465 00:20:51,630 --> 00:20:53,268 Yes, Mom, great. Thank you. 466 00:20:53,466 --> 00:20:55,742 First of all, they don't eat any sugar. 467 00:20:55,935 --> 00:20:57,005 No Carvel? 468 00:20:57,203 --> 00:20:58,773 That's the saddest thing I've ever heard in my life. 469 00:20:58,971 --> 00:21:01,247 We have tried to introduce just a little bit of sugar... 470 00:21:01,440 --> 00:21:05,286 and it was like going off the rails of the crazy train. 471 00:21:05,478 --> 00:21:06,821 My gosh! 472 00:21:07,012 --> 00:21:08,892 And there's another subject I'd like to discuss. 473 00:21:08,981 --> 00:21:10,016 Sure, anything. 474 00:21:10,216 --> 00:21:11,126 Your language. 475 00:21:11,717 --> 00:21:13,663 He won't curse. I'll break his freaking arm. 476 00:21:14,153 --> 00:21:16,099 That's great, but that's not what I meant. 477 00:21:16,288 --> 00:21:18,529 You see, there's a way that we talk to our kids. 478 00:21:18,724 --> 00:21:20,704 For instance, where you would say "No"... 479 00:21:20,893 --> 00:21:23,271 we would say, "Consider the consequences." 480 00:21:23,462 --> 00:21:25,031 Or where you would say, "Don't"... 481 00:21:25,230 --> 00:21:27,369 we would say, "Maybe you should try this." 482 00:21:27,899 --> 00:21:29,640 Or where you would say... 483 00:21:29,834 --> 00:21:31,871 "Quit your whining, you're giving me a headache"... 484 00:21:32,070 --> 00:21:34,448 we would say, "Use your words." 485 00:21:34,639 --> 00:21:36,084 You see, that way, the child feels 486 00:21:36,241 --> 00:21:37,720 that he has value, he has worth. 487 00:21:37,909 --> 00:21:39,547 He is heard. 488 00:21:40,345 --> 00:21:41,323 It's a way. 489 00:21:43,381 --> 00:21:44,189 Let's order. 490 00:21:45,250 --> 00:21:46,058 Great. 491 00:21:48,019 --> 00:21:49,657 That's very good, but if you stay 492 00:21:49,821 --> 00:21:51,459 inside the lines, it looks better. 493 00:21:51,656 --> 00:21:53,329 Here, look at mine, see? 494 00:21:53,525 --> 00:21:55,505 Dad, we don't really worry about lines. 495 00:21:55,927 --> 00:21:58,168 Honey, draw whatever your imagination tells you. 496 00:21:58,363 --> 00:22:01,674 But what's the point of having lines if you're just going to...? 497 00:22:01,866 --> 00:22:02,844 Artie. 498 00:22:04,536 --> 00:22:06,482 That's beautiful. That's absolutely beautiful. 499 00:22:06,671 --> 00:22:07,979 It's very avant-garde. 500 00:22:08,173 --> 00:22:09,880 - Picasso. - Exactly. 501 00:22:10,508 --> 00:22:12,920 You didn't finish your dinner. You know the great thing about Chinese... 502 00:22:13,111 --> 00:22:17,082 I mean, Pan Asian food, is that if you mush it all up it's... 503 00:22:19,450 --> 00:22:20,724 What happened? 504 00:22:20,918 --> 00:22:22,397 - What did you do? - I don't know. 505 00:22:22,586 --> 00:22:24,998 He doesn't like his food to touch. 506 00:22:25,255 --> 00:22:26,735 I didn't know! Look, I'm un-smushing. 507 00:22:28,459 --> 00:22:30,837 There's so much un-smushed Pan Asian. 508 00:22:32,296 --> 00:22:34,071 - What? - Use your words, Barker. 509 00:22:34,431 --> 00:22:36,001 Use your words. 510 00:22:36,200 --> 00:22:39,238 Farty ruined my food! Evil Farty. 511 00:22:39,436 --> 00:22:41,382 Evil Farty, what have you done? 512 00:22:43,140 --> 00:22:44,744 Mama! Dada! 513 00:22:44,942 --> 00:22:46,114 Don't go! 514 00:22:46,310 --> 00:22:47,254 I have to go. 515 00:22:47,411 --> 00:22:48,389 Don't go! 516 00:22:48,812 --> 00:22:50,223 Would you...? I'm trying to let go! 517 00:22:50,414 --> 00:22:51,552 Don't go! 518 00:22:52,649 --> 00:22:53,753 Don't go! 519 00:22:54,985 --> 00:22:56,362 D-Don't go! 520 00:22:56,553 --> 00:22:57,361 Just let go. 521 00:22:57,554 --> 00:22:58,794 He's just so strong. 522 00:22:58,989 --> 00:23:00,764 Let go, baby. Let go, baby. 523 00:23:00,991 --> 00:23:02,766 - Just get in the car. - I am trying. 524 00:23:02,960 --> 00:23:04,564 Barker, honey, just... 525 00:23:04,761 --> 00:23:06,069 - Get in the car. - I love you. 526 00:23:06,263 --> 00:23:07,173 I'm trying to get in the car! 527 00:23:07,331 --> 00:23:08,241 Get in the car. 528 00:23:08,432 --> 00:23:09,308 Bye. 529 00:23:09,500 --> 00:23:10,376 No! 530 00:23:10,766 --> 00:23:11,608 Drive. 531 00:23:11,801 --> 00:23:12,575 Bye, honeybun. 532 00:23:12,768 --> 00:23:14,042 Goodbye, goodbye. 533 00:23:14,237 --> 00:23:15,477 Honey, Stop! 534 00:23:15,671 --> 00:23:16,649 Bye. 535 00:23:17,974 --> 00:23:19,783 - Go. - Yay! 536 00:23:20,176 --> 00:23:21,587 I'll be home really soon. 537 00:23:21,777 --> 00:23:22,983 No! 538 00:23:23,179 --> 00:23:25,921 Barker's hyperventilating. Stop the car, please. 539 00:23:27,149 --> 00:23:28,594 - Go, go, go! - Yay! 540 00:23:28,784 --> 00:23:31,424 Give me your worst, worst case scenario. 541 00:23:31,621 --> 00:23:33,658 Everybody dies. 542 00:23:34,991 --> 00:23:38,837 Then anything short of that will be a happy surprise. 543 00:23:40,963 --> 00:23:42,169 Onward. 544 00:23:42,765 --> 00:23:44,608 - Really go now. - No! 545 00:23:45,668 --> 00:23:47,272 Good heavens. 546 00:23:47,470 --> 00:23:49,882 Time for breakfast. Come on, we got to get to school. 547 00:23:50,072 --> 00:23:53,178 Okay. Let's get this party started! 548 00:23:53,376 --> 00:23:54,821 It's going to be great! It's going to be awesome! 549 00:23:55,011 --> 00:23:56,456 We are going to have so much fun. 550 00:23:56,646 --> 00:23:59,126 This is going to be the best week of your life! 551 00:23:59,315 --> 00:24:00,293 - Right, Artie? - Sure thing, Regis. 552 00:24:00,483 --> 00:24:04,555 Okay. Here we go. Let's go, let's go, let's go. 553 00:24:04,753 --> 00:24:06,494 Oh, my gosh. 554 00:24:07,155 --> 00:24:09,533 This is it, right? 555 00:24:09,724 --> 00:24:12,728 Yeah. I'll see you on the other side. 556 00:24:15,397 --> 00:24:17,206 These are done. 557 00:24:17,399 --> 00:24:19,037 Hot skillet! Sorry. 558 00:24:19,234 --> 00:24:21,214 All right. Here are your sausages. 559 00:24:21,403 --> 00:24:22,507 Soysages. 560 00:24:22,704 --> 00:24:24,809 Soysages? What are you, from the Bronx? 561 00:24:25,006 --> 00:24:26,766 Did Mom leave my eggless egg salad for lunch? 562 00:24:26,908 --> 00:24:28,649 Eggless egg salad? How would I recognize it? 563 00:24:28,843 --> 00:24:30,345 The toast is ready. 564 00:24:30,545 --> 00:24:31,585 Di, we have to make lunch! 565 00:24:31,780 --> 00:24:34,260 I know. It's on the counter. Make the sandwiches. 566 00:24:34,449 --> 00:24:36,326 All right. My waffles, my waffles! 567 00:24:37,686 --> 00:24:38,596 I got it. 568 00:24:41,056 --> 00:24:43,161 Five second rule. Got it. 569 00:24:43,358 --> 00:24:46,896 N-Not too much almond milk in the c-cereal. It g-gets too wet. 570 00:24:47,095 --> 00:24:48,369 Is this the right amount? 571 00:24:48,530 --> 00:24:49,565 Well, eat fast. 572 00:24:50,432 --> 00:24:52,036 Okay. Here you go. 573 00:24:52,233 --> 00:24:53,576 You have to cut up the berries... 574 00:24:53,768 --> 00:24:56,771 and put one piece in each hole in the multigrain waffle. 575 00:24:56,971 --> 00:24:58,245 This food can touch? 576 00:24:58,472 --> 00:24:59,951 Eggless egg salad coming up. 577 00:25:00,140 --> 00:25:02,586 Okay, put the lettuce, hit it with the lettuce. 578 00:25:02,776 --> 00:25:03,777 It's fine, they will never know. 579 00:25:03,978 --> 00:25:05,753 No crust, no crust. 580 00:25:05,946 --> 00:25:07,666 Now there's no sandwich. Look what you made. 581 00:25:10,117 --> 00:25:13,064 I like them, Carl likes them. Right, Carl? 582 00:25:13,253 --> 00:25:16,928 And your opinion has value. And, what's the other one? 583 00:25:17,124 --> 00:25:17,932 Worth. 584 00:25:18,125 --> 00:25:21,231 But I know from experience that wearing heels can be tricky. 585 00:25:21,428 --> 00:25:22,634 Especially during recess. 586 00:25:22,830 --> 00:25:25,538 Wouldn't you and Carl both be more comfortable in sneakers? 587 00:25:25,733 --> 00:25:26,643 No. 588 00:25:26,834 --> 00:25:28,643 Hey, what's going on? We are going to be late. 589 00:25:30,437 --> 00:25:32,144 It's Project Hun way. 590 00:25:32,339 --> 00:25:34,649 I tried handling it like Alice said, but it's not working. 591 00:25:34,842 --> 00:25:36,583 All right, get the other two in the car, I'll handle this. 592 00:25:36,777 --> 00:25:37,448 Artie. 593 00:25:37,645 --> 00:25:39,454 It's okay. Let me try. 594 00:25:42,650 --> 00:25:44,152 Take off those shoes and I'll give you a dollar. 595 00:25:44,351 --> 00:25:45,421 - Five. - Two-fifty. 596 00:25:45,619 --> 00:25:46,791 Deal. 597 00:25:47,655 --> 00:25:48,928 Just punch in "go to school." 598 00:25:49,122 --> 00:25:51,568 Why is this easier than you just telling me how to get there? 599 00:25:51,758 --> 00:25:53,499 I heard that. 600 00:25:53,693 --> 00:25:56,071 Is he in there? 601 00:25:56,262 --> 00:25:57,536 It's Dad, and it's a recording. 602 00:25:57,697 --> 00:25:59,005 It's just a little family joke. 603 00:25:59,198 --> 00:26:02,145 Yeah, it's interesting because, usually, jokes are funny. 604 00:26:02,335 --> 00:26:03,837 But hey, why kill time laughing? 605 00:26:04,037 --> 00:26:05,243 Okay, here you go. 606 00:26:05,438 --> 00:26:06,416 - Thank you. - What? 607 00:26:06,606 --> 00:26:07,527 "Go garage." Go garage. 608 00:26:07,607 --> 00:26:08,551 Say it with force. 609 00:26:08,708 --> 00:26:09,686 Go garage. Go garage. 610 00:26:10,009 --> 00:26:11,454 Welcome back, Alice. 611 00:26:12,111 --> 00:26:13,181 Mommy! 612 00:26:13,379 --> 00:26:15,916 Alice, what happened? Where's Phil? 613 00:26:16,115 --> 00:26:17,185 He's on his way to the airport. 614 00:26:17,350 --> 00:26:18,420 I'm going to meet him in a few hours. 615 00:26:18,618 --> 00:26:19,528 There's an 8:00 flight tonight. 616 00:26:19,719 --> 00:26:20,459 But... 617 00:26:20,653 --> 00:26:21,653 One of my clients called. 618 00:26:21,654 --> 00:26:23,574 They need me to update their website immediately. 619 00:26:23,723 --> 00:26:25,044 Can't it wait until you get back? 620 00:26:25,158 --> 00:26:27,604 No, it's ESPN. There's a crisis with the X Games. 621 00:26:27,794 --> 00:26:28,864 You work for ESPN? 622 00:26:29,062 --> 00:26:31,622 Yeah, I'm one of their web designers. Honey, get in the backseat. 623 00:26:31,731 --> 00:26:33,369 Really? I didn't know that. 624 00:26:34,033 --> 00:26:37,276 It's interesting. ESPN. Really? 625 00:26:39,539 --> 00:26:40,381 Nice school. 626 00:26:40,573 --> 00:26:42,347 How long have you been working for ESPN? 627 00:26:42,541 --> 00:26:43,645 About five years. 628 00:26:43,842 --> 00:26:45,219 Really? 629 00:26:48,180 --> 00:26:49,955 Turner... 630 00:26:50,148 --> 00:26:51,991 Artie is going to pick you up after school... 631 00:26:52,184 --> 00:26:54,186 and take you to speech therapy today. 632 00:26:54,386 --> 00:26:56,832 Wh-Wh-Where are you-you going to be? 633 00:26:57,022 --> 00:26:58,899 Grandma and I are going to buy Harper a dress. 634 00:26:59,091 --> 00:27:00,229 Great. 635 00:27:00,425 --> 00:27:01,199 Have a good day, you two. 636 00:27:01,393 --> 00:27:02,565 See you later. 637 00:27:02,761 --> 00:27:04,401 I can't believe I'm going to get a tardy. 638 00:27:04,429 --> 00:27:05,931 Six tardies are an absent. 639 00:27:06,131 --> 00:27:07,235 How many does this make? 640 00:27:07,432 --> 00:27:08,570 One. 641 00:27:09,935 --> 00:27:12,211 Does she seem a little tightly wound? 642 00:27:12,404 --> 00:27:15,351 You know, she has HAS. High Achievement Syndrome. 643 00:27:15,540 --> 00:27:16,518 Did you make that up? 644 00:27:16,708 --> 00:27:17,743 Yes. 645 00:27:17,943 --> 00:27:18,921 Hurry up, I can't get a tardy. 646 00:27:19,111 --> 00:27:22,285 I know she's a little tightly wound. But we're working on it. 647 00:27:22,481 --> 00:27:24,586 Work on it soon before she explodes. 648 00:27:25,917 --> 00:27:30,559 W-W-Watch where you're going, Tu-Tu-Tu-Turner. 649 00:27:30,956 --> 00:27:32,697 S-S-Sorry. 650 00:27:34,192 --> 00:27:35,898 Hey, did you see that? 651 00:27:36,093 --> 00:27:37,731 Dad, no. No. 652 00:27:37,928 --> 00:27:39,339 Turner's therapist says that he has 653 00:27:39,497 --> 00:27:41,017 to work out peer conflicts on his own. 654 00:27:41,132 --> 00:27:42,110 He has a therapist? 655 00:27:42,299 --> 00:27:44,540 He had one, and now he has a new one, Dr. Jimmy. 656 00:27:44,735 --> 00:27:45,941 Also a kid? 657 00:27:46,137 --> 00:27:46,911 No. 658 00:27:48,606 --> 00:27:50,745 ESPN again. I need to get to a Wi-Fi. 659 00:27:50,941 --> 00:27:52,443 Maybe I can use the one here. 660 00:27:52,643 --> 00:27:54,083 Go ahead, I'll get Barker to school. 661 00:27:54,211 --> 00:27:55,189 Are you sure? 662 00:27:55,379 --> 00:27:56,619 Sure. What's the problem? 663 00:27:56,814 --> 00:27:58,088 Okay. 664 00:27:58,783 --> 00:27:59,761 Got the H-life. 665 00:28:00,284 --> 00:28:02,764 But then pick me up here. Don't leave me stranded. 666 00:28:02,953 --> 00:28:04,364 Have I ever left you stranded? 667 00:28:04,555 --> 00:28:05,966 Four times when I was a kid. 668 00:28:06,157 --> 00:28:08,364 I love how you remember everything. 669 00:28:20,104 --> 00:28:21,242 Okay, Barker, hop out. 670 00:28:21,438 --> 00:28:23,213 I can't. I'm still buckled in. 671 00:28:23,407 --> 00:28:24,215 Carl, unbuckle him. 672 00:28:24,408 --> 00:28:26,820 Hello? He's at a doctor's appointment. 673 00:28:27,677 --> 00:28:29,452 Stupid me. Okay. 674 00:28:36,586 --> 00:28:38,626 Boy, this is harder than one of your grandma's bras. 675 00:28:38,788 --> 00:28:39,789 I'm going to be late. 676 00:28:39,989 --> 00:28:41,798 I'm tr... 677 00:28:43,927 --> 00:28:46,737 It works, okay? Your horn works. 678 00:28:50,800 --> 00:28:52,939 I won't need this by the time you're done. 679 00:28:58,708 --> 00:29:01,154 Here you go. Here. 680 00:29:01,344 --> 00:29:03,824 Careful, he's a runner. 681 00:29:04,781 --> 00:29:07,284 Bye, Farty. 682 00:29:09,652 --> 00:29:11,529 One second. 683 00:29:11,721 --> 00:29:13,428 - Hey, Ash. - Hey, Cody. 684 00:29:13,623 --> 00:29:15,296 - Did you get my Evite? - Yep, I'm coming. 685 00:29:15,491 --> 00:29:16,970 Cool. 686 00:29:18,127 --> 00:29:20,299 This is my friend, Harper. This is Cody. 687 00:29:20,495 --> 00:29:21,838 - Hey. - Hi. 688 00:29:22,464 --> 00:29:24,535 I'm having this birthday thing Friday night. 689 00:29:24,800 --> 00:29:26,677 There's going to be a DJ, and my parents 690 00:29:26,835 --> 00:29:28,712 promised not to be ridiculously lame. 691 00:29:28,904 --> 00:29:30,110 Right. Parents. 692 00:29:30,305 --> 00:29:33,878 So, if you want to swing by, that would be pretty cool. 693 00:29:38,146 --> 00:29:39,682 I can't. 694 00:29:40,916 --> 00:29:44,329 I got this thing the next day. 695 00:29:44,519 --> 00:29:46,055 - She has a thing. - I got a thing. 696 00:29:46,255 --> 00:29:47,825 Okay. That's cool. 697 00:29:48,023 --> 00:29:49,366 Yeah. No, it's super cool. 698 00:29:49,558 --> 00:29:51,538 Well, if you change your mind, just, you know... 699 00:29:51,727 --> 00:29:53,206 Yeah. Totally, I'll... 700 00:29:53,395 --> 00:29:54,373 Cool. 701 00:29:54,930 --> 00:29:56,136 Bye. 702 00:29:58,567 --> 00:29:59,307 Stop it. 703 00:30:01,703 --> 00:30:03,011 Microwave on. 704 00:30:03,205 --> 00:30:04,206 Garbage disposal on. 705 00:30:06,174 --> 00:30:07,744 Vacuum cleaner on. 706 00:30:09,478 --> 00:30:10,998 Oh, please, just let me do the dishes. 707 00:30:11,880 --> 00:30:14,223 Welcome back, Artie Decker. 708 00:30:15,750 --> 00:30:16,694 What a morning. 709 00:30:16,884 --> 00:30:19,387 It's 9 AM, I need a martini. 710 00:30:19,587 --> 00:30:20,861 Tell me something. 711 00:30:21,489 --> 00:30:22,832 Did you believe that story? 712 00:30:23,024 --> 00:30:25,231 Absolutely not. What story? 713 00:30:25,426 --> 00:30:27,201 Alice's work emergency. 714 00:30:27,295 --> 00:30:28,365 You think she was lying? 715 00:30:28,562 --> 00:30:30,667 Why couldn't that work have been done at Hilton Head? 716 00:30:30,865 --> 00:30:33,038 It's like she doesn't trust us with her kids. 717 00:30:33,234 --> 00:30:34,838 Like she thinks we're idiots. 718 00:30:35,770 --> 00:30:37,545 By the way, where is she? 719 00:30:48,115 --> 00:30:49,423 Where have you been? 720 00:30:52,019 --> 00:30:53,692 I know. 721 00:31:01,796 --> 00:31:03,397 You know, Harper, when I was your age... 722 00:31:03,564 --> 00:31:06,009 this was my favorite time of the day, right after school. 723 00:31:06,199 --> 00:31:07,337 Why, what did you do? 724 00:31:07,534 --> 00:31:08,774 We used to go to my friend Heidi's house... 725 00:31:08,969 --> 00:31:11,381 put on her mother's clothes, blast music and smoke. 726 00:31:11,538 --> 00:31:12,949 Mom! 727 00:31:13,039 --> 00:31:15,019 Don't smoke. Don't smoke. 728 00:31:24,217 --> 00:31:26,128 Oh, Lulu, that was so great. 729 00:31:26,319 --> 00:31:28,199 Honey, you're really starting to take control... 730 00:31:28,321 --> 00:31:31,029 and literally holding the reins. 731 00:31:31,224 --> 00:31:32,726 Okay, Turner... 732 00:31:33,059 --> 00:31:34,902 would you like to share? 733 00:31:51,277 --> 00:31:52,153 Good work, Turner. 734 00:31:53,313 --> 00:31:54,291 Awesome. 735 00:31:57,517 --> 00:31:59,587 Super job, Lulu. See you next week? 736 00:31:59,785 --> 00:32:00,923 Thank you. 737 00:32:03,155 --> 00:32:05,157 That was really awesome. 738 00:32:05,357 --> 00:32:06,961 I take it you're Turner's grandfather. 739 00:32:07,493 --> 00:32:08,494 Hi. 740 00:32:09,528 --> 00:32:10,336 I'm Artie Decker. 741 00:32:10,529 --> 00:32:12,236 Cassandra. 742 00:32:12,431 --> 00:32:14,172 You seem to be having some trouble 743 00:32:14,266 --> 00:32:15,973 embracing our program, am I right? 744 00:32:16,168 --> 00:32:18,273 Well, let me say first, 745 00:32:18,370 --> 00:32:20,407 that I have professional experience in this area. 746 00:32:20,606 --> 00:32:22,745 Oh, wonderful. Where did you receive your degree? 747 00:32:22,941 --> 00:32:24,011 Oh, no degree. No. 748 00:32:24,209 --> 00:32:27,520 I speak for a living. I'm a baseball announcer. 749 00:32:28,514 --> 00:32:31,927 Little different than a PhD in speech therapy from Yale. Right? 750 00:32:32,484 --> 00:32:33,963 Right, Yeah. 751 00:32:34,653 --> 00:32:36,633 That's a point well taken. 752 00:32:36,822 --> 00:32:38,665 But on the other hand, I sat here for almost an hour... 753 00:32:38,857 --> 00:32:41,599 and I saw these kids do everything but speak. 754 00:32:41,794 --> 00:32:43,364 So, are you training them to be mimes? 755 00:32:43,562 --> 00:32:46,042 Because a lot of those jobs are being shipped overseas. 756 00:32:52,703 --> 00:32:54,740 "I'm walking, but there's wind, 757 00:32:54,839 --> 00:32:56,819 "but there's no wind." You know? 758 00:32:58,342 --> 00:33:01,846 Okay. I am employing the Houghton method. 759 00:33:02,046 --> 00:33:04,083 Now these kids, they're under too much pressure to speak... 760 00:33:04,282 --> 00:33:07,456 so we make it very clear that in here, they need not say a word. 761 00:33:07,652 --> 00:33:09,825 They're currently in a movement phase. 762 00:33:10,021 --> 00:33:10,999 Yeah, I saw that. 763 00:33:11,189 --> 00:33:13,499 They're moving everything but their lips. 764 00:33:13,691 --> 00:33:15,331 And he wears these ear buds all the time. 765 00:33:15,393 --> 00:33:16,667 What's that about? 766 00:33:16,861 --> 00:33:18,534 He is listening to the words that he has trouble with... 767 00:33:18,729 --> 00:33:21,676 and then when he's comfortable, he can repeat them. 768 00:33:21,866 --> 00:33:23,106 And it's helping him a lot. 769 00:33:23,301 --> 00:33:24,336 How can you tell? 770 00:33:24,735 --> 00:33:26,544 Listen, I haven't seen the kid in a year... 771 00:33:26,737 --> 00:33:28,876 and frankly, I don't see any improvement at all. 772 00:33:29,073 --> 00:33:31,519 What I see is my grandson is now Flight 38 773 00:33:31,609 --> 00:33:33,316 from Salt Lake. 774 00:33:34,745 --> 00:33:36,019 Hey, Turner! 775 00:33:36,214 --> 00:33:38,214 Cassandra's just telling me how great you're doing. 776 00:33:38,316 --> 00:33:41,024 She sees so much improvement. It's great. 777 00:33:44,154 --> 00:33:47,795 Sometimes I shouldn't move my lips. I'm sorry. 778 00:33:52,028 --> 00:33:53,371 That's not bad. 779 00:33:53,563 --> 00:33:56,043 "Not bad"? She looks like a 12-year-old widow. 780 00:33:57,000 --> 00:33:58,980 - I do? - You do. 781 00:33:59,169 --> 00:34:01,843 But that's perfect for a classical music program. 782 00:34:02,038 --> 00:34:03,745 Well, what about this? 783 00:34:03,940 --> 00:34:07,012 This is perfect for someone with a cute little hiney. 784 00:34:07,544 --> 00:34:08,545 I love it. 785 00:34:08,745 --> 00:34:11,248 Mom, it's for a concert, not to meet the fleet. 786 00:34:11,448 --> 00:34:14,258 Hey, it's an audition, and all auditions are alike. 787 00:34:14,451 --> 00:34:15,759 "Get their attention!" 788 00:34:15,952 --> 00:34:17,488 You sell the sizzle, not the steak. 789 00:34:17,687 --> 00:34:19,488 That's how I got all those weather girl jobs. 790 00:34:19,623 --> 00:34:21,398 So, are you a trained meteorologist? 791 00:34:21,591 --> 00:34:22,569 Trained? 792 00:34:22,759 --> 00:34:24,830 Oh, honey, I had a tight dress and a pointer. 793 00:34:25,028 --> 00:34:26,439 I used to sing my forecasts. 794 00:34:26,630 --> 00:34:28,191 As a matter of fact, sometimes your mom 795 00:34:28,265 --> 00:34:30,370 used to sing them with me on TV. 796 00:34:30,567 --> 00:34:31,773 Mom, you never even told me that! 797 00:34:31,868 --> 00:34:32,869 I mentioned it. 798 00:34:33,069 --> 00:34:34,949 Remember our winter song? That was our best one. 799 00:34:35,105 --> 00:34:36,311 No, I don't remember that one. 800 00:34:36,406 --> 00:34:37,406 Sure you do. 801 00:34:37,606 --> 00:34:38,846 We sang it 1,000 times. 802 00:34:39,041 --> 00:34:41,715 I love you. Come on, please. No one's watching. 803 00:34:41,911 --> 00:34:42,855 Only for you. 804 00:34:43,045 --> 00:34:44,353 Ready? 805 00:34:44,547 --> 00:34:48,893 Button up your overcoat in the wintry breeze 806 00:34:49,084 --> 00:34:53,055 Take good care of yourself 'cause it's nine degrees! 807 00:34:53,189 --> 00:34:54,691 Good job, Mom. 808 00:34:54,890 --> 00:34:55,766 Do the spin. 809 00:34:55,958 --> 00:34:58,768 Okay. I'll never shop at Bloomingdale's again. 810 00:34:58,961 --> 00:35:00,736 You still got it, kiddo. 811 00:35:00,930 --> 00:35:02,603 That was great. 812 00:35:03,165 --> 00:35:04,701 All right, now... 813 00:35:04,900 --> 00:35:07,101 you've got to try this on. I'm dying to see this on you. 814 00:35:07,269 --> 00:35:08,577 - Okay. - Okay. 815 00:35:08,771 --> 00:35:12,981 Mom. She cannot wear a cocktail dress to the audition. 816 00:35:13,175 --> 00:35:15,416 I'd like to feel that you're listening to me. 817 00:35:15,611 --> 00:35:17,331 Oh, I'm sorry, honey. Did you say something? 818 00:35:17,846 --> 00:35:18,620 No, no. 819 00:35:18,814 --> 00:35:20,760 Look at this. This is a hot little number. 820 00:35:22,518 --> 00:35:24,828 Oh, not for her. For me. 821 00:35:25,020 --> 00:35:26,795 Cue the band. 822 00:35:29,692 --> 00:35:32,194 Hey. What are you doing? 823 00:35:32,393 --> 00:35:33,872 Guarding the door. 824 00:35:34,062 --> 00:35:35,040 Can I go in? 825 00:35:35,230 --> 00:35:36,368 Not today, sir. 826 00:35:36,564 --> 00:35:37,599 Is he crying? 827 00:35:37,699 --> 00:35:39,940 He doesn't cry, he makes the face. 828 00:35:42,170 --> 00:35:43,706 I didn't mean to upset him. 829 00:35:43,905 --> 00:35:45,976 You should've used your exit shoes. 830 00:35:46,174 --> 00:35:46,811 My What? 831 00:35:47,008 --> 00:35:50,478 Exit shoes, to walk away and not use a red voice. 832 00:35:50,678 --> 00:35:52,248 And a red voice is...? 833 00:35:52,447 --> 00:35:56,452 Super-mad sounding. You shouldn't use it. Never. 834 00:35:56,651 --> 00:35:59,825 That's why you have a cool toolbox. 835 00:36:00,021 --> 00:36:02,194 It's where you keep your cool blue voice, 836 00:36:02,290 --> 00:36:04,429 your exit shoes and your repair squares. 837 00:36:05,026 --> 00:36:06,232 Where did you learn all this? 838 00:36:06,427 --> 00:36:07,337 Preschool. 839 00:36:07,528 --> 00:36:09,735 You mean, there are more kids like you? 840 00:36:09,931 --> 00:36:12,741 I'm doomed. All right, I'm going in there. 841 00:36:12,934 --> 00:36:14,311 What's in it for me? 842 00:36:19,774 --> 00:36:21,185 Thank you. 843 00:36:21,943 --> 00:36:23,512 The little capitalist. 844 00:36:27,447 --> 00:36:28,289 Hi, there. 845 00:36:28,482 --> 00:36:32,294 All right, so I am taking a repair square out of my cool toolbox... 846 00:36:32,486 --> 00:36:35,262 to say in my blue voice, that I am sorry. 847 00:36:37,124 --> 00:36:38,102 So, are we good now? 848 00:36:38,392 --> 00:36:39,200 No. 849 00:36:39,393 --> 00:36:41,031 - Would you like five dollars? - No. 850 00:36:41,228 --> 00:36:43,936 An unopened package of men's size 34 underwear? 851 00:36:44,131 --> 00:36:44,939 No. 852 00:36:45,132 --> 00:36:46,975 Is there anything I can do to make this right? 853 00:36:47,334 --> 00:36:50,474 W-Well, th-there is one thing. 854 00:36:56,576 --> 00:36:59,853 They made six of these? 855 00:37:00,247 --> 00:37:01,692 No. 856 00:37:02,115 --> 00:37:04,857 Now, this is Artie's idea of fun. 857 00:37:05,252 --> 00:37:07,664 Look at that. 858 00:37:07,854 --> 00:37:10,164 Who knew ice cream could be a cake? 859 00:37:10,357 --> 00:37:12,359 Yeah. All right, now here's the deal. 860 00:37:12,559 --> 00:37:13,936 Just little pieces... 861 00:37:14,127 --> 00:37:17,164 and you don't tell Mommy about the movie... 862 00:37:17,363 --> 00:37:20,037 and I don't tell her about the cake. 863 00:37:20,232 --> 00:37:22,940 Okay? All right? Deal? Friends again? 864 00:37:23,069 --> 00:37:23,909 High five! All right. 865 00:37:24,904 --> 00:37:29,444 Incoming message. Urgent e-mail from "E-spen. " 866 00:37:29,675 --> 00:37:31,552 ESPN... 867 00:37:39,051 --> 00:37:40,894 Pam Rosen. 868 00:37:42,888 --> 00:37:44,333 You guys okay? 869 00:37:44,657 --> 00:37:46,694 I will be right back. 870 00:37:55,668 --> 00:37:57,341 Ms. Pam Rosen, please. 871 00:37:57,536 --> 00:38:00,847 My name is Cal R. Life. 872 00:38:01,040 --> 00:38:05,489 Yeah. L-Y-P-H-E-T. The "T" is silent. 873 00:38:06,245 --> 00:38:08,986 What a great day. It's like a birthday that came early. 874 00:38:09,180 --> 00:38:10,181 It was a great day. 875 00:38:10,382 --> 00:38:12,589 And my forecast for the rest of the week... 876 00:38:12,684 --> 00:38:13,856 Sunny, sunny, sunny. 877 00:38:14,052 --> 00:38:15,497 Back to you, Herb. 878 00:38:15,687 --> 00:38:17,894 Oh, it's your dad, I'll be right in. 879 00:38:18,089 --> 00:38:18,829 Hi! 880 00:38:19,023 --> 00:38:20,525 Today is your lucky day, Ms. Rosen. 881 00:38:20,725 --> 00:38:23,331 The catfish just jumped right into your frying pan. 882 00:38:23,528 --> 00:38:25,906 Yeah, Artie Decker, "De Voice" is in town. 883 00:38:26,097 --> 00:38:28,509 He heard about your X Games and he would love to audition. 884 00:38:28,700 --> 00:38:31,544 I'm just walking in. Video chat me in 2 minutes, okay? 885 00:38:31,736 --> 00:38:34,342 Hi, Artie, we're back! Did you have fun with the boys? 886 00:38:35,940 --> 00:38:38,546 Look at this place! We're going to have to call FEMA! 887 00:38:38,743 --> 00:38:39,448 Cake. 888 00:38:39,644 --> 00:38:41,385 - Where's Artie? - He left! 889 00:38:41,579 --> 00:38:42,557 He left? 890 00:38:42,747 --> 00:38:44,055 If your mother sees this... 891 00:38:44,249 --> 00:38:45,193 What's going on? 892 00:38:46,584 --> 00:38:48,086 Hi. 893 00:38:48,420 --> 00:38:49,421 What did you do? 894 00:38:49,621 --> 00:38:51,430 I just got here! 895 00:38:51,623 --> 00:38:52,931 You gave them cake? 896 00:38:53,124 --> 00:38:54,569 I gave them slivers. 897 00:38:54,759 --> 00:38:56,102 Why? Why, Artie? 898 00:38:56,394 --> 00:38:58,965 Because he upset Turner at Speech Class. 899 00:38:59,164 --> 00:39:00,124 - What? - It was nothing. 900 00:39:00,331 --> 00:39:01,468 I just asked a question. 901 00:39:01,565 --> 00:39:03,045 "Why is nobody speaking?" That's all. 902 00:39:04,134 --> 00:39:05,442 Hello, lave! 903 00:39:05,636 --> 00:39:09,277 I can't wait for you to get here, me little rabbit. 904 00:39:09,540 --> 00:39:12,020 Not now! My. 905 00:39:12,876 --> 00:39:14,878 Did he have a tattoo? 906 00:39:17,548 --> 00:39:18,458 Harper? 907 00:39:19,750 --> 00:39:22,196 Mom! You lied to me! 908 00:39:22,386 --> 00:39:24,093 Yogurt is not like ice cream! 909 00:39:24,188 --> 00:39:25,223 No, honey. 910 00:39:27,925 --> 00:39:28,733 Baby? 911 00:39:29,927 --> 00:39:31,736 - My favorite! - Harper! 912 00:39:37,601 --> 00:39:41,913 This perfectly sums up your entire approach to parenting. 913 00:39:42,105 --> 00:39:43,083 We had an approach? 914 00:39:43,273 --> 00:39:44,251 I don't know. 915 00:39:44,441 --> 00:39:48,048 Would Artie and Turner like to continue watching Saw? 916 00:39:48,245 --> 00:39:50,225 You must be mistaken. 917 00:39:50,414 --> 00:39:52,325 Saw, Rated R for strong graphic violence, 918 00:39:52,416 --> 00:39:53,622 nudity and language. 919 00:39:53,816 --> 00:39:54,817 No. 920 00:39:55,318 --> 00:39:56,626 Why did he give them cake? 921 00:39:56,919 --> 00:39:59,160 Because he does what he wants and she defends him! 922 00:39:59,355 --> 00:40:00,390 Where are the kids now? 923 00:40:00,823 --> 00:40:03,235 Oh, I put them on the treadmill until they calm down. 924 00:40:03,426 --> 00:40:05,929 I told you my parents cauldn't handle this. 925 00:40:06,128 --> 00:40:09,109 Maybe it's just a case of first-day, worst-day. 926 00:40:10,299 --> 00:40:13,303 Hey. You better hurry up. You're going to miss your flight. 927 00:40:13,503 --> 00:40:15,983 Honey, I don't think that I should go today. 928 00:40:16,639 --> 00:40:18,039 Maybe I should go tomorrow morning. 929 00:40:18,140 --> 00:40:19,084 Okay. Yeah. 930 00:40:19,675 --> 00:40:21,245 We 'll still have four days together. 931 00:40:21,777 --> 00:40:22,585 Okay. 932 00:40:22,778 --> 00:40:23,984 You look good in cake. 933 00:40:29,385 --> 00:40:31,126 What in the world is wrong with you? 934 00:40:31,621 --> 00:40:32,827 What did I say? 935 00:40:33,022 --> 00:40:34,524 What did I say to you? 936 00:40:34,724 --> 00:40:35,845 Just talk to me. Don't yell. 937 00:40:36,025 --> 00:40:37,905 I said, "Artie, this is a second chance for us." 938 00:40:38,027 --> 00:40:39,370 I said, "Artie, please behave." 939 00:40:39,562 --> 00:40:42,133 I said, "Artie, I really want those kids to love us!" 940 00:40:42,331 --> 00:40:45,005 Or can't you remember all the way back to yesterday? 941 00:40:45,201 --> 00:40:46,179 Okay, that's what I did. 942 00:40:46,369 --> 00:40:48,348 When the cake went in their mouths they loved me! 943 00:40:48,537 --> 00:40:51,484 Yeah, and now Alice doesn't want to leave us alone with them. 944 00:40:51,673 --> 00:40:52,651 She doesn't trust us! 945 00:40:52,841 --> 00:40:53,819 She said that? 946 00:40:54,009 --> 00:40:55,454 On the phone to Phil. 947 00:40:56,011 --> 00:40:58,651 I accidentally overheard her when I was listening at the door. 948 00:40:59,080 --> 00:41:01,492 She thinks we're a pair of knuckleheads. 949 00:41:01,816 --> 00:41:03,193 Especially you! 950 00:41:06,555 --> 00:41:08,660 It's the bottom of the ninth, Artie. 951 00:41:08,857 --> 00:41:10,700 We're going to lose the game. 952 00:41:11,059 --> 00:41:12,333 Shape UP- 953 00:41:35,750 --> 00:41:37,354 Wonderful. 954 00:41:39,920 --> 00:41:41,160 Bravo. 955 00:41:42,222 --> 00:41:45,533 Harper, that was wonderful! 956 00:41:45,726 --> 00:41:46,704 I stunk. 957 00:41:46,894 --> 00:41:47,975 You most certainly did not! 958 00:41:49,797 --> 00:41:51,504 Wasn't she wonderful? 959 00:41:51,699 --> 00:41:52,507 No. 960 00:41:52,700 --> 00:41:54,873 This will not be good enough for your audition! 961 00:41:55,069 --> 00:41:56,571 You must practice more! 962 00:41:56,770 --> 00:41:59,410 When my daughter underperforms, I shun her. 963 00:41:59,607 --> 00:42:01,609 This girl should be shunned! 964 00:42:02,042 --> 00:42:05,080 Practice, practice, practice! 965 00:42:05,913 --> 00:42:07,517 Gee whiz. 966 00:42:07,715 --> 00:42:10,594 Wasn't she the villain in the last James Bond movie? 967 00:42:11,719 --> 00:42:12,925 Sweetie, don't listen to her. 968 00:42:14,488 --> 00:42:17,264 You know back in Amarillo, when Artie was announcing there... 969 00:42:17,458 --> 00:42:19,699 I got this audition to be the local weather girl. 970 00:42:19,893 --> 00:42:21,804 Well, I was so uptight. 971 00:42:21,996 --> 00:42:25,273 Artie took me out the night before and we both got bombed! 972 00:42:25,466 --> 00:42:27,537 And the next day I got the job. 973 00:42:28,235 --> 00:42:29,771 So, you're saying I should drink? 974 00:42:31,038 --> 00:42:32,778 No, no, no. I'm not saying that. 975 00:42:32,972 --> 00:42:35,612 I am saying that perhaps you could relax. 976 00:42:35,808 --> 00:42:37,208 You could go out with your friends. 977 00:42:37,276 --> 00:42:40,120 You could have some fun Friday night. You know? 978 00:42:40,513 --> 00:42:43,858 Friday, I was invited to a... 979 00:42:48,154 --> 00:42:48,996 No. 980 00:42:49,288 --> 00:42:50,266 No, no, no! 981 00:42:50,890 --> 00:42:54,099 I have three more days! I have to practice! I have to... 982 00:42:54,293 --> 00:42:56,933 I have to practice every second! 983 00:43:00,500 --> 00:43:01,877 Doctor Schveer? 984 00:43:02,402 --> 00:43:03,472 Yes? 985 00:43:03,670 --> 00:43:05,445 Perhaps we got off on the wrong foot. 986 00:43:05,638 --> 00:43:06,810 But I would like to let you know that... 987 00:43:07,006 --> 00:43:09,646 if you ever speak to my granddaughter like that again... 988 00:43:09,842 --> 00:43:11,203 there will be nothing left of you, 989 00:43:11,244 --> 00:43:12,524 but some red hair and an accent! 990 00:43:12,712 --> 00:43:14,487 Is that clear, comrade? 991 00:43:38,904 --> 00:43:40,713 Thank you. Here you go. 992 00:43:44,576 --> 00:43:45,577 Carcinogens. 993 00:43:46,611 --> 00:43:48,011 Oh, the first one just laid a base. 994 00:43:48,113 --> 00:43:50,593 This is the real thing. I'm at the ballpark. 995 00:43:54,853 --> 00:43:56,491 He likes baseball? 996 00:43:56,688 --> 00:43:57,666 Yeah, he likes lots of things. 997 00:43:57,856 --> 00:44:01,360 He likes sports. He likes science, he likes movies. 998 00:44:01,560 --> 00:44:02,868 He likes cake. 999 00:44:03,061 --> 00:44:04,233 Touché. 1000 00:44:05,097 --> 00:44:07,941 He's just hidden behind that... stutter. 1001 00:44:08,133 --> 00:44:10,739 Well, you know, kids have a way of working these things out. 1002 00:44:11,236 --> 00:44:12,214 No, they don't, Dad. 1003 00:44:12,404 --> 00:44:14,077 That's why there's prison. 1004 00:44:16,575 --> 00:44:17,735 All right, guys, bring it in! 1005 00:44:17,776 --> 00:44:19,456 Bring it in! Get all those hands in there. 1006 00:44:19,543 --> 00:44:20,453 Come on. 1007 00:44:20,644 --> 00:44:23,921 Everybody on three. One, two, three... 1008 00:44:24,115 --> 00:44:26,061 Let's have fun! 1009 00:44:27,318 --> 00:44:29,798 I am so excited about this. 1010 00:44:30,321 --> 00:44:31,265 Let's play! 1011 00:44:31,455 --> 00:44:32,365 He's pitching! 1012 00:44:32,556 --> 00:44:33,296 Yeah. 1013 00:44:33,491 --> 00:44:34,492 He has a good arm. 1014 00:44:34,592 --> 00:44:35,570 Like Mom, like son. 1015 00:44:35,760 --> 00:44:36,738 Yeah, right. 1016 00:44:36,927 --> 00:44:38,270 No, you had a hose. 1017 00:44:38,462 --> 00:44:40,203 But then you hit puberty and you got all girlie on me. 1018 00:44:40,397 --> 00:44:42,399 Well, gee, Dad, I'm so sorry that I hit puberty. 1019 00:44:42,600 --> 00:44:43,880 I was so proud of you back then. 1020 00:44:43,934 --> 00:44:45,607 You were usually the only girl out there. 1021 00:44:46,003 --> 00:44:48,210 You used to stand up to those stinky boys. 1022 00:44:48,405 --> 00:44:50,316 Do you remember that summer when you worked for me in the booth... 1023 00:44:50,508 --> 00:44:52,249 keeping score and doing stats? 1024 00:44:52,443 --> 00:44:53,820 You were so cute, sitting there 1025 00:44:53,911 --> 00:44:55,948 scrunched over your little pencil. 1026 00:44:56,447 --> 00:44:58,048 You never saw that ball coming, did you? 1027 00:44:58,149 --> 00:44:59,429 You could have yelled "Incoming" 1028 00:44:59,450 --> 00:45:01,370 I was on the air. I didn't want to start a panic. 1029 00:45:01,485 --> 00:45:03,260 You do love that job. 1030 00:45:03,454 --> 00:45:04,489 - Yeah. - Yeah. 1031 00:45:04,688 --> 00:45:05,666 Yeah, I do. 1032 00:45:05,856 --> 00:45:06,834 Batter up! 1033 00:45:08,159 --> 00:45:09,638 This is that bully kid. 1034 00:45:09,827 --> 00:45:10,998 Yeah, Ivan. 1035 00:45:11,194 --> 00:45:13,572 I would so like to see Turner strike him out. 1036 00:45:23,973 --> 00:45:24,610 Strike! 1037 00:45:25,041 --> 00:45:28,284 Strike one! Hey, he is really good. He's really good. 1038 00:45:28,478 --> 00:45:29,957 Way to go, Turner! 1039 00:45:30,146 --> 00:45:31,124 Turner Simmons on the mound... 1040 00:45:31,314 --> 00:45:33,794 a young Cuban prospect who escaped on a raft. 1041 00:45:33,983 --> 00:45:35,428 He's facing Ivan, a miserable child 1042 00:45:35,518 --> 00:45:37,119 who is loathed and despised by everyone. 1043 00:45:37,120 --> 00:45:38,155 Dad! 1044 00:45:41,324 --> 00:45:43,964 Swing and a miss! Strike two! 1045 00:45:44,060 --> 00:45:45,664 One more strike and it's back 1046 00:45:45,762 --> 00:45:47,298 to the dugout for this eight-year-old bullfrog. 1047 00:45:47,497 --> 00:45:48,407 Dad... 1048 00:45:48,631 --> 00:45:51,737 The yearbook said Ivan is "Most likely to do time." 1049 00:45:53,770 --> 00:45:55,113 Simmons looks at him. 1050 00:45:57,373 --> 00:45:58,408 He shakes it off. 1051 00:46:02,679 --> 00:46:03,656 Here's the pitch. 1052 00:46:04,780 --> 00:46:07,317 Strike three! You're out of there! 1053 00:46:09,017 --> 00:46:10,587 Lights out, Alice! 1054 00:46:14,056 --> 00:46:16,002 Way to go, Turner! Way to look! 1055 00:46:16,258 --> 00:46:18,704 Blue, Blue! That's three strikes! 1056 00:46:19,027 --> 00:46:21,007 One, two, three! Out of there! 1057 00:46:21,230 --> 00:46:22,504 Time! 1058 00:46:22,965 --> 00:46:24,000 It's okay! 1059 00:46:24,199 --> 00:46:26,270 This is my dad and he's new here! 1060 00:46:26,568 --> 00:46:29,208 Oh, okay. There are no outs in this game. 1061 00:46:29,872 --> 00:46:31,715 No outs? How is that possible? 1062 00:46:31,907 --> 00:46:35,445 They hit until they get on base. 1063 00:46:35,644 --> 00:46:37,351 - Seriously? - Seriously. 1064 00:46:37,546 --> 00:46:39,184 Dad, why don't we just sit down? 1065 00:46:41,149 --> 00:46:42,127 All right. 1066 00:46:42,885 --> 00:46:44,285 But you know that's kind of stupid! 1067 00:46:44,386 --> 00:46:46,832 Because if you just think of the song... 1068 00:46:47,022 --> 00:46:49,298 'Cause it's one, two, three strikes, you're out... 1069 00:46:49,491 --> 00:46:50,834 at the old ball game 1070 00:46:51,026 --> 00:46:51,731 Not... 1071 00:46:51,927 --> 00:46:53,304 until you get a hit 1072 00:46:53,495 --> 00:46:55,975 He's right! I hate these games! What's the point? 1073 00:46:56,164 --> 00:46:58,734 The point is for the kids to enjoy the game without competition. 1074 00:46:58,933 --> 00:47:00,310 Yeah, but competition is the game. 1075 00:47:00,501 --> 00:47:01,571 You know, it's like life. 1076 00:47:01,769 --> 00:47:02,873 Let me ask you something. 1077 00:47:03,070 --> 00:47:04,750 I mean, how do you even know who's winning? 1078 00:47:04,839 --> 00:47:06,318 In this league, we don't keep score. 1079 00:47:06,874 --> 00:47:09,878 Every game ends in a tie. 1080 00:47:11,045 --> 00:47:12,319 Oh, no. 1081 00:47:12,513 --> 00:47:15,585 No agony of defeat? Just the thrill of a tie? 1082 00:47:15,783 --> 00:47:17,353 It's good they don't keep score! 1083 00:47:17,551 --> 00:47:18,859 Yeah, 'cause your kid stinks. 1084 00:47:19,053 --> 00:47:20,589 Oh, I will bust you up! 1085 00:47:20,788 --> 00:47:22,358 The old guy's right. It's boring. 1086 00:47:22,556 --> 00:47:23,193 See? 1087 00:47:23,391 --> 00:47:25,132 It is not boring! 1088 00:47:25,493 --> 00:47:27,302 They're children and they're having fun! 1089 00:47:27,495 --> 00:47:29,839 And there's plenty of time in their lives to keep score! 1090 00:47:30,031 --> 00:47:31,476 - And you are out! - No, I'm not. 1091 00:47:31,666 --> 00:47:33,577 Oh, yeah. Turner, you struck him out. 1092 00:47:33,768 --> 00:47:34,974 - No, I didn't. - Yes, you did. 1093 00:47:35,169 --> 00:47:35,977 - You're out. - No, I'm not! 1094 00:47:36,170 --> 00:47:36,875 - You're out! - No, I'm not! 1095 00:47:37,071 --> 00:47:38,175 - Three strikes, you're out! - No, I'm not! 1096 00:47:38,372 --> 00:47:39,510 Barker, what's going on? 1097 00:47:39,707 --> 00:47:41,311 Farty is going crazy. 1098 00:47:41,509 --> 00:47:42,487 Again? 1099 00:47:42,677 --> 00:47:44,054 - You're out! - No, you're out! 1100 00:47:46,347 --> 00:47:49,919 Ivan, no hitting! Use your words! 1101 00:47:50,116 --> 00:47:51,527 Yes, Mom. 1102 00:47:51,718 --> 00:47:56,064 I'm angry that you said I was out. 1103 00:48:03,763 --> 00:48:05,834 Well, it's not boring anymore. 1104 00:48:07,400 --> 00:48:09,277 How is this Artie's fault? 1105 00:48:09,469 --> 00:48:12,109 All I saw was that little monster grab a baseball bat... 1106 00:48:12,305 --> 00:48:14,683 and hit your father in his... special place. 1107 00:48:14,874 --> 00:48:17,081 Well, you didn't see what led up to it. 1108 00:48:19,446 --> 00:48:21,357 - It was my fault. - Oh, honey. 1109 00:48:21,748 --> 00:48:23,455 You threatened her violin teacher? 1110 00:48:24,050 --> 00:48:25,085 She says "threatened." 1111 00:48:25,285 --> 00:48:27,390 I say "defended my granddaughter." 1112 00:48:30,090 --> 00:48:31,091 - Phil? - Hey. 1113 00:48:31,291 --> 00:48:33,396 Hey, we won. I won! 1114 00:48:33,560 --> 00:48:35,767 I won! Can you believe it? 1115 00:48:35,962 --> 00:48:37,908 Oh, my gosh! 1116 00:48:38,098 --> 00:48:40,704 That's fantastic! That's fantastic! 1117 00:48:40,900 --> 00:48:42,776 - Daddy won! - Congrats, Dad! 1118 00:48:42,968 --> 00:48:45,778 So, they're giving me the award tomorrow night. 1119 00:48:45,971 --> 00:48:47,075 When are you getting here? 1120 00:48:47,272 --> 00:48:49,232 You don't know what's going on here. It's madness. 1121 00:48:49,274 --> 00:48:51,584 We can't leave our children with my parents. 1122 00:48:51,777 --> 00:48:53,984 So, what are you saying? That you're not coming? 1123 00:48:54,179 --> 00:48:56,625 Phil, please listen to me. Try to understand. 1124 00:48:56,815 --> 00:48:57,793 I'm sorry. 1125 00:48:57,983 --> 00:49:00,293 Yeah. I understand perfectly. 1126 00:49:00,486 --> 00:49:01,556 All right. 1127 00:49:03,655 --> 00:49:04,963 See you when I get back. 1128 00:49:09,762 --> 00:49:11,708 Okay. We're going home. 1129 00:49:11,897 --> 00:49:12,875 No. 1130 00:49:13,232 --> 00:49:14,233 No? 1131 00:49:14,333 --> 00:49:15,437 Artie and the kids are going home. 1132 00:49:15,634 --> 00:49:17,580 I am taking you to the airport. 1133 00:49:17,770 --> 00:49:18,475 What? 1134 00:49:18,670 --> 00:49:20,741 Alice, your dad and I have 1135 00:49:20,839 --> 00:49:22,978 bent over backwards to try to do things your way. 1136 00:49:23,175 --> 00:49:24,984 You haven't bent over at all. 1137 00:49:25,177 --> 00:49:27,316 Oh, I'm bent. Believe me, I'm bent. 1138 00:49:27,513 --> 00:49:29,049 Now, look. You asked us to come here 1139 00:49:29,148 --> 00:49:30,252 and take care of our grandchildren... 1140 00:49:30,449 --> 00:49:32,224 and you haven't given us the chance to do it. 1141 00:49:32,418 --> 00:49:34,727 You have been on our backs, especially your dad's... 1142 00:49:34,919 --> 00:49:35,897 ever since we got here! 1143 00:49:36,087 --> 00:49:39,296 Okay, take his side, because you always do anyway. 1144 00:49:39,490 --> 00:49:40,560 And for a good reason. 1145 00:49:40,758 --> 00:49:42,533 Because after your kids grow up, 1146 00:49:42,693 --> 00:49:44,468 your husband is the one who stays. 1147 00:49:44,662 --> 00:49:47,302 Alice, I know you're trying to be a perfect parent... 1148 00:49:47,498 --> 00:49:49,842 but, honey, there's no such thing. 1149 00:49:50,034 --> 00:49:52,241 And frankly, you need to show Phil... 1150 00:49:52,437 --> 00:49:56,146 he's not just their father, he's also your husband. 1151 00:49:56,974 --> 00:49:59,682 Alice, I'm your mom. Take it from me, I really get it. 1152 00:49:59,877 --> 00:50:02,448 "Love the man, love the dream." 1153 00:50:02,647 --> 00:50:04,456 Well, your husband's dream is coming true... 1154 00:50:04,649 --> 00:50:07,289 and part of that dream is you being there with him! 1155 00:50:07,485 --> 00:50:09,294 How can you not go? 1156 00:50:09,554 --> 00:50:11,124 Oh, honey, you have to go. 1157 00:50:12,023 --> 00:50:13,263 You're going! 1158 00:50:13,658 --> 00:50:14,864 What about my clothes? 1159 00:50:14,959 --> 00:50:16,131 I don't think he wants you in clothes. 1160 00:50:16,327 --> 00:50:17,635 Besides, your luggage is already there. 1161 00:50:17,829 --> 00:50:20,139 Hey, kids, Mommy's finally going. 1162 00:50:20,331 --> 00:50:21,708 What about my audition? 1163 00:50:21,899 --> 00:50:23,674 I'll take care of it! It'll be fantastic! 1164 00:50:23,868 --> 00:50:25,040 See you at the ranch. 1165 00:50:25,236 --> 00:50:26,510 No. Bye! 1166 00:50:26,704 --> 00:50:27,681 This is a happy day- 1167 00:50:27,871 --> 00:50:29,976 Happy day 1168 00:50:31,208 --> 00:50:33,381 Could you drive? I don't feel good. 1169 00:51:00,604 --> 00:51:03,517 Gonna stand there gawking? Gonna let me in? 1170 00:51:19,856 --> 00:51:22,426 No score here in the bottom of the seventh with 2 outs. 1171 00:51:22,625 --> 00:51:25,697 The Giants and the Atlanta Braves locked into a pitching duel. 1172 00:51:25,895 --> 00:51:27,875 Lincecum and Hudson, both have been fantastic. 1173 00:51:28,063 --> 00:51:31,670 As Buster Posey steps in, takes a strike in the inside corner. 1174 00:51:31,867 --> 00:51:34,609 I got to tell you friends, this is one of those nights... 1175 00:51:34,803 --> 00:51:39,013 72 degrees, 45,000 fans, smell of the popcorn, the hot dogs... 1176 00:51:39,208 --> 00:51:41,449 all of those clichés, but I'll tell you something... 1177 00:51:41,644 --> 00:51:43,681 there's no other place I'd rather be. 1178 00:51:43,879 --> 00:51:45,916 Posey hits a line drive to third and that'll do it. 1179 00:51:46,115 --> 00:51:48,026 That's it, no score through seven. 1180 00:51:48,217 --> 00:51:52,597 We'll be back. This is Artie Decker, De Voice of the Giants. 1181 00:52:00,829 --> 00:52:03,139 Reminder: No school today. 1182 00:52:03,332 --> 00:52:05,278 You have tickets for the symphony. 1183 00:52:06,802 --> 00:52:08,713 What's wrong with your face? 1184 00:52:08,904 --> 00:52:10,705 Oh, and you're such a pleasure in the morning? 1185 00:52:11,540 --> 00:52:13,280 You're not going to like this. 1186 00:52:15,543 --> 00:52:17,545 Barker! 1187 00:52:24,986 --> 00:52:26,021 Is it coming off? 1188 00:52:26,120 --> 00:52:27,531 Well, not exactly. 1189 00:52:27,722 --> 00:52:30,259 Sorry, Farty. 1190 00:52:35,563 --> 00:52:36,541 Let's go! 1191 00:52:36,731 --> 00:52:38,733 I gotta go number two! I gotta go number two! 1192 00:52:38,900 --> 00:52:40,538 No, we're already late! 1193 00:52:40,735 --> 00:52:42,214 Artie, just take him. 1194 00:52:42,403 --> 00:52:44,246 All right. Okay, batter up! Let's go. 1195 00:52:44,439 --> 00:52:47,215 No, no, he can hold it, guys. He's fine, he can hold it! 1196 00:52:47,408 --> 00:52:48,614 The symphony starts at two! 1197 00:52:51,679 --> 00:52:52,657 Quarter? 1198 00:52:52,747 --> 00:52:53,817 Not today, thank you. 1199 00:52:54,115 --> 00:52:55,321 Okay. 1200 00:52:55,516 --> 00:52:56,995 - Hey, buddy. - Sorry! 1201 00:52:58,253 --> 00:52:58,753 So sorry. 1202 00:52:59,287 --> 00:53:00,288 That's not human. 1203 00:53:01,522 --> 00:53:03,331 - Hurry up! - Yeah. 1204 00:53:04,292 --> 00:53:06,100 Okay. Here we go. 1205 00:53:06,293 --> 00:53:07,897 Yeah. 1206 00:53:08,128 --> 00:53:09,232 Okay, there you go. 1207 00:53:09,429 --> 00:53:11,466 I can't sit on that. 1208 00:53:11,665 --> 00:53:12,939 I'll give you 10 bucks. 1209 00:53:13,133 --> 00:53:15,170 Daddy always sings to me. 1210 00:53:18,472 --> 00:53:22,443 Come out, come out, Mr. Daodie... 1211 00:53:22,643 --> 00:53:26,352 and swim in the swimming pool 1212 00:53:26,546 --> 00:53:30,494 I know it's dark where you're hiding... 1213 00:53:30,684 --> 00:53:34,632 but out here it's really coal 1214 00:53:37,691 --> 00:53:41,537 Come on, come on, Mr. Daodie... 1215 00:53:41,728 --> 00:53:45,266 'cause we've got something to do 1216 00:53:46,166 --> 00:53:49,306 And if you hurry... 1217 00:53:49,503 --> 00:53:53,645 you 'll meet Carl the kangaroo 1218 00:53:55,409 --> 00:53:56,547 Yes! 1219 00:53:57,411 --> 00:53:59,981 Hey, buddy, can you keep singing? 1220 00:54:01,681 --> 00:54:04,252 Come out, come out, Mr. 1221 00:54:06,319 --> 00:54:07,297 Come on. 1222 00:54:07,486 --> 00:54:09,864 He's still out there! We're okay! We're okay! 1223 00:54:10,056 --> 00:54:11,592 Nothing's the matter. 1224 00:54:13,793 --> 00:54:14,863 Thank you very much. 1225 00:54:14,960 --> 00:54:16,701 This way. Come on, honey. 1226 00:54:20,633 --> 00:54:22,044 Oh, we made it. 1227 00:54:23,602 --> 00:54:27,049 Big crowd. Must be helmet night. 1228 00:54:30,376 --> 00:54:31,684 It wasn't that funny. 1229 00:54:55,266 --> 00:54:57,007 Carl and I want to leave. 1230 00:54:57,202 --> 00:54:58,374 Don't leave your seat. 1231 00:54:58,570 --> 00:54:59,878 You said "don't." 1232 00:55:00,071 --> 00:55:01,982 Consider the consequences, mister. 1233 00:55:03,241 --> 00:55:04,914 It's not me, it's him. 1234 00:55:05,276 --> 00:55:07,517 I'm sorry. Kids. 1235 00:55:09,547 --> 00:55:11,527 Barker? Barker? 1236 00:55:14,352 --> 00:55:16,389 Hey, come back here! 1237 00:55:17,389 --> 00:55:19,391 Don't go "no". Yes! Get. 1238 00:55:29,701 --> 00:55:31,840 Who brings a child to Tchaikovsky? 1239 00:55:32,036 --> 00:55:34,209 Me. Voodoo-man. 1240 00:55:34,739 --> 00:55:36,810 Carl, come on! 1241 00:55:38,543 --> 00:55:40,386 - Gr-Grandma? - Yes, dear? 1242 00:55:40,578 --> 00:55:42,615 Artie's ch-chasing Barker. 1243 00:55:42,814 --> 00:55:44,656 Oh, that's nice, dear. 1244 00:55:46,216 --> 00:55:47,126 What? 1245 00:55:50,154 --> 00:55:52,532 Excuse me. Excuse me! 1246 00:55:52,723 --> 00:55:55,169 Excuse me. Barker! Get back here! 1247 00:55:55,359 --> 00:55:56,997 - Stop it! - Barker! 1248 00:55:57,194 --> 00:55:58,332 Oh, my...! 1249 00:55:58,529 --> 00:55:59,974 Where is he? 1250 00:56:00,164 --> 00:56:01,837 - Over there! - Barker! 1251 00:56:02,032 --> 00:56:03,136 Barker! 1252 00:56:03,333 --> 00:56:04,311 Carl! 1253 00:56:05,536 --> 00:56:06,708 Get over here! 1254 00:56:08,639 --> 00:56:09,447 Let's see. 1255 00:56:11,642 --> 00:56:12,985 - Artie? - I'm sorry! 1256 00:56:13,177 --> 00:56:14,554 I can't take this anymore! 1257 00:56:14,745 --> 00:56:17,851 This whole "teachable moments" and protecting their self-esteem... 1258 00:56:18,048 --> 00:56:19,356 and nobody gets punished! 1259 00:56:19,550 --> 00:56:21,655 And every game ends in a tie! 1260 00:56:22,186 --> 00:56:24,393 All I hear is "Use your words. Use your words". 1261 00:56:24,588 --> 00:56:27,694 But the word they never use with these kids is "no"! 1262 00:56:36,733 --> 00:56:38,370 Come on, Mr. Decker. 1263 00:56:38,568 --> 00:56:40,849 The other patients are waiting for you in Arts and Crafts. 1264 00:56:41,037 --> 00:56:42,516 One second. 1265 00:56:42,705 --> 00:56:44,480 I am very sorry for what happened here. 1266 00:56:44,674 --> 00:56:47,484 Just split it with her. 1267 00:56:48,010 --> 00:56:48,852 Thank you. 1268 00:56:49,045 --> 00:56:50,820 Savages. 1269 00:57:10,533 --> 00:57:11,637 Well, he'll be there. 1270 00:57:11,834 --> 00:57:14,007 Yeah, Artie Decker. You're going to love him. He's a pro's pro. 1271 00:57:14,203 --> 00:57:16,479 Tomorrow, 11 AM, Piedmont Park. 1272 00:57:16,672 --> 00:57:18,015 I'll see... He'll see you then. 1273 00:57:18,207 --> 00:57:20,346 All right, bye now. 1274 00:57:20,543 --> 00:57:22,420 Piedmont Park, map. 1275 00:57:23,513 --> 00:57:24,514 Dinner! 1276 00:57:25,081 --> 00:57:26,185 Who was that? 1277 00:57:26,382 --> 00:57:28,658 Market research. Always at dinner time. How do they know? 1278 00:57:29,852 --> 00:57:32,525 Hey, kids, would you sit down? 1279 00:57:33,688 --> 00:57:35,690 I have something I want to clear up. Something's bothering me. 1280 00:57:35,891 --> 00:57:36,995 I just want to say... 1281 00:57:37,192 --> 00:57:40,503 I was never, ever going to actually spank Barker. 1282 00:57:41,196 --> 00:57:42,476 But you threatened to spank him. 1283 00:57:42,631 --> 00:57:43,575 But I never was going to do it. 1284 00:57:43,765 --> 00:57:45,767 - But he didn't know that. - That's why it worked. 1285 00:57:47,135 --> 00:57:49,081 - There we go! - It looks great! 1286 00:57:49,271 --> 00:57:50,249 Thank you, honey. 1287 00:57:50,438 --> 00:57:52,509 Th-This isn't what-what we asked for. 1288 00:57:52,707 --> 00:57:55,244 Yes, I know. I got your e-mails. But... 1289 00:57:55,443 --> 00:57:57,389 This is how a family eats. 1290 00:57:57,579 --> 00:58:00,685 We all sit at one table and we all eat the same thing. 1291 00:58:00,882 --> 00:58:02,190 It's not how we eat. 1292 00:58:02,384 --> 00:58:03,795 But you know something, Barker... 1293 00:58:03,985 --> 00:58:06,522 Grandma worked very hard to make your mom's recipe... 1294 00:58:06,721 --> 00:58:08,257 just the way that your mom makes it... 1295 00:58:08,456 --> 00:58:11,266 so I think that we owe her the courtesy of eating it and enjoying it. 1296 00:58:11,526 --> 00:58:14,097 Oh, honey, thank you. That is so sweet. 1297 00:58:18,333 --> 00:58:19,813 I'm going to order a pizza. Who's in? 1298 00:58:26,907 --> 00:58:30,286 Hey, you've been sitting here for hours. 1299 00:58:30,477 --> 00:58:32,286 Are you playing a game? 1300 00:58:32,479 --> 00:58:34,390 That looks like fun. Do you just press it here? 1301 00:58:34,582 --> 00:58:35,560 No, no, no! 1302 00:58:35,649 --> 00:58:36,650 Game aver. 1303 00:58:39,253 --> 00:58:40,254 Sorry. 1304 00:58:41,255 --> 00:58:42,996 Turner, let me ask you a question. 1305 00:58:43,691 --> 00:58:45,671 You ever watch the X Games? Stuff like that? 1306 00:58:45,859 --> 00:58:46,929 S-S-Sometimes. 1307 00:58:47,127 --> 00:58:48,834 Yeah. Do you think you know the lingo? 1308 00:58:49,029 --> 00:58:53,671 You mean like "h-heinous," or "gn-gnarled out," or "n-nose bone"? 1309 00:58:53,867 --> 00:58:54,902 Yeah, that kind of stuff. 1310 00:58:55,102 --> 00:58:57,844 Listen, how about later I tuck you in and we talk more about this? 1311 00:58:58,038 --> 00:59:02,077 S-Sure. Except for the t-tucking in. I'm eight. 1312 00:59:02,276 --> 00:59:03,254 Okay, I get it. 1313 00:59:03,444 --> 00:59:06,084 And, listen, I'm sorry if I embarrassed you the other day. 1314 00:59:06,280 --> 00:59:08,123 Wh-Which day was th-that? 1315 00:59:08,849 --> 00:59:10,351 Touché. 1316 00:59:10,951 --> 00:59:11,952 One other thing. 1317 00:59:12,152 --> 00:59:15,826 This Ivan kid, he's a punk. Stand up to him. 1318 00:59:16,389 --> 00:59:20,166 Anything he starts, you can finish. Believe in yourself. 1319 00:59:20,360 --> 00:59:22,966 And once you believe in yourself, you can do anything. 1320 00:59:23,162 --> 00:59:25,836 You can look trouble right in the eye and just wink at it. 1321 00:59:26,032 --> 00:59:28,273 And everything will be okay. It's all attitude. 1322 00:59:28,668 --> 00:59:30,272 Now, how do you turn this on? 1323 00:59:30,470 --> 00:59:32,381 Th-That's just a t-table. 1324 00:59:37,010 --> 00:59:37,613 Okay, let's go. 1325 00:59:37,810 --> 00:59:43,488 Goodbye, Harper, Turner, Barker, Diane and Farty Decker. 1326 00:59:43,683 --> 00:59:44,684 She did that on purpose. 1327 00:59:44,884 --> 00:59:46,725 Remember, you're taking Barker for a play date. 1328 00:59:46,819 --> 00:59:47,854 Okay. 1329 00:59:47,954 --> 00:59:49,831 Alice says this is very, very important. 1330 00:59:50,023 --> 00:59:51,024 They're still new here... 1331 00:59:51,224 --> 00:59:53,465 and Barker hasn't had a chance to make new friends, okay? 1332 00:59:53,593 --> 00:59:54,571 I got it. 1333 00:59:54,761 --> 00:59:55,967 Bye, Barker. 1334 00:59:56,162 --> 00:59:57,140 Bye. 1335 00:59:57,764 --> 00:59:59,243 Let me ask you something. 1336 00:59:59,699 --> 01:00:01,300 This play date kid, he's imaginary, too? 1337 01:00:01,934 --> 01:00:03,641 - No. - How will I know how to get there? 1338 01:00:03,836 --> 01:00:06,180 Use the R-life. Turner already punched in the address. 1339 01:00:06,372 --> 01:00:08,749 Okay. Di, can you pick up Barker after the play date? 1340 01:00:08,940 --> 01:00:10,886 Pick him up? You're supposed to stay with him the whole time. 1341 01:00:11,076 --> 01:00:12,996 What? When did his play date become my play date? 1342 01:00:13,045 --> 01:00:14,649 I can't help you! I got to go, hon. 1343 01:00:14,846 --> 01:00:15,756 No, I.. 1344 01:00:16,281 --> 01:00:17,259 Okay. 1345 01:00:17,449 --> 01:00:18,894 - Bye. - Bye. Have fun! 1346 01:00:19,084 --> 01:00:19,892 Okay. 1347 01:00:20,085 --> 01:00:21,996 All right. Have a good time! 1348 01:00:22,187 --> 01:00:24,929 We're going to have a great time at the play date! 1349 01:00:25,624 --> 01:00:27,103 How would you like to ditch this play date? 1350 01:00:27,292 --> 01:00:29,499 I hate play dates. No one talks to Carl. 1351 01:00:29,695 --> 01:00:30,975 Well, how rude are those people? 1352 01:00:31,129 --> 01:00:32,938 Would you like to do something fun with me? 1353 01:00:33,131 --> 01:00:34,735 Great. All right, let's go. 1354 01:00:35,534 --> 01:00:37,343 R-life, find me a mall. 1355 01:00:42,374 --> 01:00:43,944 Do you guys want to go to the skatepark later? 1356 01:00:44,142 --> 01:00:45,712 I-I-Ivan! 1357 01:00:46,445 --> 01:00:48,948 What do you want, T-T-Turner? 1358 01:00:49,147 --> 01:00:50,285 Listen, p-punk! 1359 01:00:50,482 --> 01:00:52,587 Anything that you start... 1360 01:00:52,784 --> 01:00:54,889 I-I can f-finish! 1361 01:00:57,923 --> 01:01:00,233 We were at our locker and he ran up... 1362 01:01:00,425 --> 01:01:02,961 and it was such an awkward silence. I had no idea what to say. 1363 01:01:03,160 --> 01:01:04,764 So, are you coming to my party? 1364 01:01:04,962 --> 01:01:07,909 Oh, hi. Oh, I don't think that I can. 1365 01:01:08,099 --> 01:01:09,579 I got to go. See you tonight, I hope. 1366 01:01:09,600 --> 01:01:11,637 Oh, please don't go. 1367 01:01:11,836 --> 01:01:13,577 He so likes you. 1368 01:01:26,484 --> 01:01:28,623 So, Tony, are you going to bust a 900 today, dude? 1369 01:01:28,819 --> 01:01:31,163 Or are you going show us something that's going to blow our minds. 1370 01:01:31,355 --> 01:01:32,493 Something we've never seen before? 1371 01:01:32,690 --> 01:01:33,828 I don't know. Maybe I'll try a 900... 1372 01:01:34,024 --> 01:01:36,104 and then give you a tattoo right in the middle of it. 1373 01:01:36,460 --> 01:01:37,632 Come on! We're late! 1374 01:01:37,828 --> 01:01:39,171 But I have to go pee-pee! 1375 01:01:39,363 --> 01:01:41,172 I don't have a song for that. 1376 01:01:57,514 --> 01:01:58,515 Sorry. 1377 01:01:58,715 --> 01:02:02,720 Talk a little bit about that particular night and you hitting the 900. 1378 01:02:02,919 --> 01:02:04,523 It wasn't something I planned to do. 1379 01:02:04,621 --> 01:02:06,191 It was just I had hit my best... 1380 01:02:06,756 --> 01:02:08,360 I got to go pee! 1381 01:02:10,093 --> 01:02:11,902 How does it feel to be back in Atlanta? 1382 01:02:12,095 --> 01:02:14,905 Hey, I'm here. Sorry I'm late. Motorcycle trouble. 1383 01:02:15,198 --> 01:02:18,042 I'm Artie "Mad Dog" Decker! What's up, homeslice? 1384 01:02:18,234 --> 01:02:19,212 You're Artie Decker? 1385 01:02:19,402 --> 01:02:20,904 Reporting for duty. 1386 01:02:21,437 --> 01:02:22,415 We up for the same job? 1387 01:02:22,572 --> 01:02:23,550 I hope not. 1388 01:02:23,740 --> 01:02:25,420 Wait a second. You don't know who this is? 1389 01:02:25,608 --> 01:02:26,678 Of course I do. 1390 01:02:27,577 --> 01:02:29,579 Dude, this is Tony Hawk, man! 1391 01:02:29,779 --> 01:02:30,883 Yeah, Tony Hawkman. How you doing? 1392 01:02:31,080 --> 01:02:32,058 All right. 1393 01:02:32,248 --> 01:02:33,727 - Who's the kid? - This is my agent. 1394 01:02:34,250 --> 01:02:35,228 Too many facelifts. 1395 01:02:35,451 --> 01:02:37,829 If he gets one more, he's going back in time. 1396 01:02:39,522 --> 01:02:41,729 I'm going to go take my runs. 1397 01:02:43,226 --> 01:02:46,207 So, how do we roll? 1398 01:02:46,396 --> 01:02:47,430 How do we roll? 1399 01:02:47,629 --> 01:02:48,699 Well, we roll this way. 1400 01:02:48,897 --> 01:02:50,417 The riders are practicing, so you just 1401 01:02:50,499 --> 01:02:51,978 ad lib like it's the actual event. 1402 01:02:52,167 --> 01:02:53,441 Just call it like I see it? 1403 01:02:53,635 --> 01:02:55,239 - That's it. - Okay, dope. 1404 01:02:55,437 --> 01:02:57,110 Hey, can't have a kid up here, man. 1405 01:02:57,306 --> 01:02:58,580 No, no, no. Kid's with me. He's fine. 1406 01:02:58,774 --> 01:02:59,616 We're just going to go right over there. 1407 01:02:59,808 --> 01:03:01,788 I promise you, everything's going to be good. 1408 01:03:04,980 --> 01:03:06,891 You sit right here. Okay? 1409 01:03:07,082 --> 01:03:08,789 Carl and I have to go pee-pee. 1410 01:03:08,984 --> 01:03:09,792 Just give me one minute... 1411 01:03:09,985 --> 01:03:11,896 and I promise you can do all the peeing that you want. 1412 01:03:12,087 --> 01:03:13,225 But we really... 1413 01:03:13,422 --> 01:03:14,628 Farty has spoken. 1414 01:03:14,823 --> 01:03:16,734 - Ready? - Yeah, yeah, coming. 1415 01:03:19,261 --> 01:03:21,263 - Okay. - Go! Go, go. 1416 01:03:21,463 --> 01:03:22,441 Hello there, everybody! 1417 01:03:22,631 --> 01:03:23,905 It's a beautiful day and thanks for coming out! 1418 01:03:24,099 --> 01:03:25,169 - Here's one... - Cut! 1419 01:03:25,367 --> 01:03:27,176 - What? - He's finished. The run's over. 1420 01:03:27,703 --> 01:03:28,977 All right. 1421 01:03:29,638 --> 01:03:31,117 Give me one more chance. I'm just warming up. 1422 01:03:31,306 --> 01:03:32,944 Hey, even Sinatra cleared his throat. 1423 01:03:33,141 --> 01:03:34,347 All right, pops, come on. Try to keep up. 1424 01:03:34,543 --> 01:03:36,181 Ready? Three, two... 1425 01:03:39,514 --> 01:03:41,117 It is on and it is epic. 1426 01:03:41,315 --> 01:03:43,591 We're expecting to see a frontside heelflip 540... 1427 01:03:43,784 --> 01:03:46,958 990 body varial with a Cab 7 Melon Grab. 1428 01:03:47,154 --> 01:03:48,565 Melon Grab, my cousin got arrested 1429 01:03:48,656 --> 01:03:49,977 on the subway for melon-grabbing. 1430 01:03:55,062 --> 01:03:56,632 Tony started when he was very young. 1431 01:03:56,731 --> 01:03:58,267 He actually skated out of his mother. 1432 01:03:58,466 --> 01:03:59,536 Can I ask you something? I wonder about this. 1433 01:03:59,734 --> 01:04:01,475 - Absolutely. - How do you practice these tricks... 1434 01:04:01,669 --> 01:04:02,704 before you get really good at them? 1435 01:04:02,904 --> 01:04:06,317 Do you say, "I'm just going to do this. Somebody get a mop"? 1436 01:04:06,507 --> 01:04:08,350 Wait. Is that a kid on the half-pipe? 1437 01:04:08,643 --> 01:04:09,644 Barker! 1438 01:04:10,845 --> 01:04:11,846 Barker! 1439 01:04:14,682 --> 01:04:15,990 Barker, what are you doing? 1440 01:04:16,517 --> 01:04:18,053 I told you I had to pee. 1441 01:04:18,252 --> 01:04:19,452 Is all that coming out of you? 1442 01:04:19,587 --> 01:04:21,624 - I saved it up. - When? Since birth? 1443 01:04:42,108 --> 01:04:44,179 What you did back there was pretty dangerous. 1444 01:04:44,377 --> 01:04:45,185 Do you know that? 1445 01:04:45,378 --> 01:04:46,914 Carl told me to do it. 1446 01:04:48,281 --> 01:04:51,194 I don't think Carl is being a very good friend to you. 1447 01:04:51,384 --> 01:04:53,887 For a kangaroo, he's something of a thrill-seeker. 1448 01:04:54,087 --> 01:04:57,591 And I think it's time that you start telling Carl what to do. 1449 01:04:58,091 --> 01:04:59,229 One other thing. 1450 01:05:00,060 --> 01:05:01,562 I was supposed to... 1451 01:05:02,262 --> 01:05:05,709 watch after you today, and I didn't do a good job. 1452 01:05:07,000 --> 01:05:08,104 I'm sorry. 1453 01:05:08,735 --> 01:05:12,114 So, Farty would appreciate it... 1454 01:05:12,305 --> 01:05:14,148 if when we get home... 1455 01:05:14,641 --> 01:05:17,781 you don't tell anyone what happened. Okay? 1456 01:05:18,578 --> 01:05:20,057 Twenty bucks. 1457 01:05:21,348 --> 01:05:22,156 Deal. 1458 01:05:22,582 --> 01:05:24,323 Let's go home. Come on. 1459 01:05:29,688 --> 01:05:31,429 Carl, come on. 1460 01:05:34,593 --> 01:05:35,765 - How could you? - What? 1461 01:05:35,961 --> 01:05:36,939 You think I don't know? 1462 01:05:37,129 --> 01:05:38,335 I want my 20 bucks back. 1463 01:05:38,530 --> 01:05:39,736 He's just a little boy! 1464 01:05:39,932 --> 01:05:40,910 He's fine. 1465 01:05:41,100 --> 01:05:43,080 Fine? Take a look at him. 1466 01:05:43,268 --> 01:05:45,077 Not him. Turner. 1467 01:05:45,270 --> 01:05:46,351 What are you talking about? 1468 01:05:46,438 --> 01:05:50,284 I'm talking about Turner and that brilliant advice you gave him. 1469 01:05:53,645 --> 01:05:54,715 Hey. 1470 01:05:58,183 --> 01:06:00,663 I have to ask, did you hit him back? 1471 01:06:00,853 --> 01:06:02,764 - No. - Why not? 1472 01:06:02,955 --> 01:06:04,764 B-Because I hit him f-first. 1473 01:06:04,957 --> 01:06:06,231 Then he... 1474 01:06:06,425 --> 01:06:09,099 He started screaming and s-someone helped him fight me. 1475 01:06:09,294 --> 01:06:10,974 Two against one? How big was this other... 1476 01:06:11,163 --> 01:06:12,767 It was his little sister. 1477 01:06:12,965 --> 01:06:13,966 She did this. 1478 01:06:14,466 --> 01:06:16,468 Turner, this is all my fault. 1479 01:06:17,136 --> 01:06:19,638 When I said stand up for yourself, I didn't mean hitting. 1480 01:06:20,371 --> 01:06:21,179 All right, listen. 1481 01:06:21,639 --> 01:06:25,109 Oh, boy. The older I get, the lower the floor gets. 1482 01:06:26,644 --> 01:06:29,147 Turner, can I share something with you? 1483 01:06:29,347 --> 01:06:31,759 Just between me and you. No one else knows this. 1484 01:06:31,949 --> 01:06:33,451 This is just two guys talking. 1485 01:06:33,651 --> 01:06:37,258 When I was your age, I was very shy because I was short. 1486 01:06:37,455 --> 01:06:38,934 I didn't talk to anybody. 1487 01:06:39,123 --> 01:06:40,534 And my self-esteem... 1488 01:06:40,725 --> 01:06:45,003 You know, the way I feel about myself, was really bad. 1489 01:06:45,196 --> 01:06:46,470 Do you ever feel that way? 1490 01:06:47,532 --> 01:06:50,035 Yeah? Well, you know what? You shouldn't. 1491 01:06:50,234 --> 01:06:51,804 Because you're a great kid. 1492 01:06:52,637 --> 01:06:55,049 All right, I want to play you something. 1493 01:06:55,239 --> 01:06:57,515 Hey, house, I want to play something. 1494 01:06:58,076 --> 01:06:59,384 Okay. 1495 01:07:01,612 --> 01:07:02,784 Okay. 1496 01:07:04,015 --> 01:07:05,892 Now, the first time I heard this... 1497 01:07:06,084 --> 01:07:09,224 I knew right away that I had found my voice. 1498 01:07:09,420 --> 01:07:12,366 I knew that I had to become a baseball announcer. 1499 01:07:12,556 --> 01:07:13,477 And once I knew that... 1500 01:07:13,557 --> 01:07:15,917 it didn't matter what anybody else thought or said about me. 1501 01:07:16,026 --> 01:07:18,233 Sh-sh-shot heard round the w-world? 1502 01:07:18,428 --> 01:07:20,738 Right. The shot heard round the world. 1503 01:07:20,931 --> 01:07:21,931 Let me tell you about it. 1504 01:07:25,168 --> 01:07:27,705 It's 1951. Long time ago. 1505 01:07:27,904 --> 01:07:30,214 Brooklyn Dodgers, New York Giants. 1506 01:07:30,407 --> 01:07:31,886 And they hated each other. 1507 01:07:32,075 --> 01:07:34,385 L-Like Luke S-Skywalker and D-Darth Vader. 1508 01:07:34,578 --> 01:07:35,556 Worse. 1509 01:07:35,745 --> 01:07:38,658 Well, the baseball season ends and they're tied. 1510 01:07:38,849 --> 01:07:40,419 Now, this one game would decide... 1511 01:07:40,617 --> 01:07:42,119 who would go to the World Series 1512 01:07:42,219 --> 01:07:43,698 against the great New York Yankees. 1513 01:07:43,887 --> 01:07:45,764 Biggest game in the history of New York. 1514 01:07:46,523 --> 01:07:48,161 Bottom of the ninth inning, two outs, 1515 01:07:48,258 --> 01:07:49,862 the Giants are losing 4 to 2... 1516 01:07:50,060 --> 01:07:52,631 and a batter named Bobby Thomson comes up to bat. 1517 01:07:54,030 --> 01:07:56,476 Bobby Thomson up there swinging. 1518 01:07:56,666 --> 01:07:57,747 He's had two out of three, 1519 01:07:57,834 --> 01:07:59,040 a single and a double, and Billy Cox is... 1520 01:07:59,236 --> 01:08:01,842 Close your eyes. Close your eyes, come on. 1521 01:08:02,038 --> 01:08:04,847 Close your eyes and you can see it. 1522 01:08:05,374 --> 01:08:07,047 Bobby hitting at .292. 1523 01:08:07,243 --> 01:08:08,963 Lockman without too big of a lead at second“ 1524 01:08:09,044 --> 01:08:11,245 but he 'll be running like the wind if Thomson hits one. 1525 01:08:11,280 --> 01:08:12,258 Branca throws. 1526 01:08:12,448 --> 01:08:15,088 There's a long drive! It's gonna be, I believe... 1527 01:08:15,284 --> 01:08:16,888 The Giants win the pennant! 1528 01:08:17,086 --> 01:08:20,431 The Giants win the pennant! The Giants win the pennant! 1529 01:08:20,689 --> 01:08:22,225 The Giants win the pennant! 1530 01:08:22,424 --> 01:08:26,065 Bobby Thomson hits into the lower deck of the left field stands! 1531 01:08:26,262 --> 01:08:27,673 The Giants win the pennant... 1532 01:08:27,863 --> 01:08:30,707 and they're going crazy, they're going crazy! 1533 01:08:30,900 --> 01:08:32,846 And home! 1534 01:08:33,369 --> 01:08:34,507 I don't believe it! 1535 01:08:34,703 --> 01:08:36,046 I do not believe it! 1536 01:08:36,238 --> 01:08:40,118 The Giants won it by a score of 5 to 4... 1537 01:08:40,309 --> 01:08:42,585 and they're picking Bobby Thomson up“ 1538 01:08:42,778 --> 01:08:44,382 and carrying him off the field! 1539 01:08:44,580 --> 01:08:46,753 That's what gave me my dream. 1540 01:08:46,949 --> 01:08:49,349 Now the big dream, of course, was to announce for the Giants. 1541 01:08:49,485 --> 01:08:50,463 D-Did you? 1542 01:08:51,320 --> 01:08:53,425 No. But... 1543 01:08:53,622 --> 01:08:54,965 Y-You still might? 1544 01:08:56,824 --> 01:08:58,132 You never know. 1545 01:08:58,760 --> 01:09:00,603 C-C-Can I h-hear it again? 1546 01:09:01,596 --> 01:09:02,734 Sure. 1547 01:09:04,265 --> 01:09:06,609 Bobby Thomson up there swinging. 1548 01:09:06,801 --> 01:09:08,007 He's had two out of three, 1549 01:09:08,102 --> 01:09:10,062 a single and a double, and Billy Cox is playing... 1550 01:09:15,610 --> 01:09:18,284 Honey, we're going to play a game. You want to join us? 1551 01:09:18,513 --> 01:09:20,424 - Grandma, I can't. - Why? 1552 01:09:20,615 --> 01:09:22,135 Because if I don't do well tomorrow... 1553 01:09:22,283 --> 01:09:24,058 then I won't get into the Atlanta Youth Symphony... 1554 01:09:24,252 --> 01:09:25,613 which is a feeder for Juilliard... 1555 01:09:25,620 --> 01:09:27,540 which offers a graduate class with Sarah Chang... 1556 01:09:27,655 --> 01:09:29,726 whose students are virtually guaranteed 1557 01:09:29,824 --> 01:09:31,064 to get into the Berlin Philharmonic... 1558 01:09:31,259 --> 01:09:33,060 which is the orchestra I most want to play in. 1559 01:09:33,328 --> 01:09:34,306 - Sweetheart. - Yes. 1560 01:09:34,495 --> 01:09:35,616 Berlin's not going anywhere. 1561 01:09:35,797 --> 01:09:37,970 Well, neither am I if I don't practice. 1562 01:09:38,499 --> 01:09:41,446 Okay, I'll tell the boys. But you're sure now? 1563 01:09:41,636 --> 01:09:42,512 Yes. 1564 01:09:42,704 --> 01:09:44,183 Okay. 1565 01:09:47,575 --> 01:09:49,417 Gentlemen, the game is called Kick the Can. 1566 01:09:49,610 --> 01:09:51,112 Are you going to recycle that? 1567 01:09:51,311 --> 01:09:53,382 I-It's d-dirty out here. 1568 01:09:53,580 --> 01:09:54,718 And windy! 1569 01:09:54,915 --> 01:09:56,952 I know. It's called "outside." 1570 01:09:57,451 --> 01:09:59,089 Is she coming? 1571 01:09:59,620 --> 01:10:00,655 Oh, too bad. 1572 01:10:00,854 --> 01:10:02,993 All right, guys, the object of the game, 1573 01:10:03,090 --> 01:10:05,161 kick the can without getting tagged! 1574 01:10:05,359 --> 01:10:06,804 Okay, here we go! 1575 01:10:06,994 --> 01:10:08,473 Come on! 1576 01:10:08,662 --> 01:10:09,902 Kick... Come on. 1577 01:10:10,097 --> 01:10:11,770 S-Sounds b-boring. 1578 01:10:11,965 --> 01:10:13,069 Boring? 1579 01:10:13,267 --> 01:10:14,507 Yeah? 1580 01:10:14,701 --> 01:10:16,977 Who wants a chance to clobber old Artie? 1581 01:10:17,170 --> 01:10:17,978 Right. 1582 01:10:18,639 --> 01:10:20,482 And then see him eat dirt! 1583 01:10:20,807 --> 01:10:22,252 And then kick the can so hard... 1584 01:10:22,442 --> 01:10:24,422 it goes in one ear and out the other! 1585 01:10:25,512 --> 01:10:27,014 I do! I do! 1586 01:10:27,214 --> 01:10:28,693 I do! 1587 01:10:28,882 --> 01:10:29,917 In my ear? 1588 01:10:30,117 --> 01:10:31,425 Out of my way, Farty. 1589 01:10:32,552 --> 01:10:33,394 Over here! 1590 01:10:33,587 --> 01:10:34,565 Good kick! 1591 01:10:34,755 --> 01:10:35,859 Turner, it's mine! 1592 01:10:39,593 --> 01:10:40,765 I got it, I got it! 1593 01:10:40,861 --> 01:10:42,965 Look out for me, I'm Super Artie! 1594 01:10:44,830 --> 01:10:45,808 Watch it, watch it! 1595 01:10:46,766 --> 01:10:47,801 Pass me the can! 1596 01:10:48,134 --> 01:10:49,204 Over here. 1597 01:10:50,236 --> 01:10:51,544 Farty! 1598 01:10:54,340 --> 01:10:55,876 Well! 1599 01:10:56,075 --> 01:10:57,611 Okay. Let the games begin! 1600 01:11:08,854 --> 01:11:09,958 Come on! 1601 01:11:51,296 --> 01:11:52,400 Are you okay? 1602 01:11:52,497 --> 01:11:53,532 I'm fine. 1603 01:11:53,732 --> 01:11:55,769 You should see the other guy! 1604 01:11:59,404 --> 01:12:01,042 - I got more ice. - Oh, thank you, honey. 1605 01:12:01,239 --> 01:12:02,650 It should be stopping soon. 1606 01:12:02,841 --> 01:12:04,149 I should start dinner. 1607 01:12:04,342 --> 01:12:05,412 Grandma? 1608 01:12:05,510 --> 01:12:06,511 Yes, dear? 1609 01:12:07,579 --> 01:12:10,059 I know my audition is tomorrow, but I practiced all day. 1610 01:12:10,248 --> 01:12:12,089 And you said I should relax the night before... 1611 01:12:12,183 --> 01:12:13,992 and there's this party tonight. 1612 01:12:14,185 --> 01:12:15,858 It's the first party I've been invited to since we moved. 1613 01:12:16,054 --> 01:12:17,362 What if I just went for a half an hour... 1614 01:12:17,555 --> 01:12:19,675 came right back home, got a really good night's sleep? 1615 01:12:19,724 --> 01:12:21,032 What kind of a party? 1616 01:12:21,559 --> 01:12:23,197 Just this party for some boy. 1617 01:12:25,163 --> 01:12:26,141 He kind of likes me. 1618 01:12:27,232 --> 01:12:28,801 I'll do your make-up! 1619 01:12:40,043 --> 01:12:41,181 I wish we could stay. 1620 01:12:41,378 --> 01:12:43,289 Yeah, we should do this, like... 1621 01:12:43,480 --> 01:12:44,322 Yeah, like... 1622 01:12:44,515 --> 01:12:46,290 - Every week? - Yes. 1623 01:12:46,483 --> 01:12:48,690 The child that was involved was not injured. 1624 01:12:48,886 --> 01:12:50,331 Take a look and a listen to this. 1625 01:12:50,521 --> 01:12:52,728 It was scary. I was about to nail this 900... 1626 01:12:52,923 --> 01:12:55,665 and there's this kid up there just whizzing away. 1627 01:12:55,859 --> 01:12:58,533 I hit his stream and I fishtailed, and now it's on YouTube. 1628 01:12:58,729 --> 01:13:01,005 It's got more hits than Charlie the Unicorn. 1629 01:13:01,198 --> 01:13:03,701 And when I asked what he was doing, you know what he said? 1630 01:13:03,901 --> 01:13:06,814 "I was chasing Carl, my kangaroo. " 1631 01:13:07,004 --> 01:13:08,847 That's one twisted little dude. 1632 01:13:09,039 --> 01:13:13,146 This is from Tony Hawk's practice run this morning at the X Games. 1633 01:13:13,277 --> 01:13:15,086 And you know, it kind of begs the question... 1634 01:13:15,279 --> 01:13:17,156 what kind of parent would let their child 1635 01:13:17,247 --> 01:13:19,693 wander out onto the half-pipe? 1636 01:13:28,119 --> 01:13:28,995 Hey! 1637 01:13:29,621 --> 01:13:30,861 How is this for bonding? 1638 01:13:31,056 --> 01:13:32,262 I taught them how to shave. 1639 01:13:32,591 --> 01:13:34,832 Yeah. Show her your legs, boys. 1640 01:13:35,594 --> 01:13:37,164 That's great! 1641 01:13:37,362 --> 01:13:41,105 And guess what? I ordered Chinese“ I mean, Pan Asian, for dinner. 1642 01:13:42,634 --> 01:13:43,704 Noodles! 1643 01:13:43,902 --> 01:13:45,263 All right, go upstairs and change. 1644 01:13:45,437 --> 01:13:47,610 When you come down, we're going to arm-wrestle Grandma. 1645 01:13:49,741 --> 01:13:51,186 How come we just had one? 1646 01:13:51,376 --> 01:13:52,514 It's not too late. 1647 01:13:52,711 --> 01:13:55,089 It's really late. Come here, I want to show you something. 1648 01:13:55,280 --> 01:13:57,226 - What? - Look at this. 1649 01:13:57,415 --> 01:13:59,190 - That's Alice's song. - Yeah. 1650 01:13:59,384 --> 01:14:01,227 She was, like, three or four years old, how did she remember? 1651 01:14:01,419 --> 01:14:03,899 I don't know, but it's at the top of her playlist. 1652 01:14:06,057 --> 01:14:09,470 We must have sang that song a thousand times to her in the car! 1653 01:14:09,661 --> 01:14:11,368 - You know you want to. - I don't want to sing it. 1654 01:14:11,563 --> 01:14:14,702 Oh, I wonder, wonder, whom-ba-doo-hoo-whom 1655 01:14:15,266 --> 01:14:18,304 Who wrote the book of love? 1656 01:14:18,502 --> 01:14:22,541 Tell me, tell me, tell me Oh, who wrote the book of love? 1657 01:14:22,740 --> 01:14:26,620 I got to know the answer was it someone from above? 1658 01:14:26,810 --> 01:14:29,848 Oh, I wonder, wonder, whom ba-doo-hoo-whom. 1659 01:14:30,481 --> 01:14:31,892 Who wrote the book of love? 1660 01:14:32,082 --> 01:14:33,857 What is that? 1661 01:14:34,051 --> 01:14:36,088 Chapter one says you lave her, 1662 01:14:36,186 --> 01:14:38,188 you love her with all your heart 1663 01:14:38,389 --> 01:14:40,266 Chapter two, you tell her... 1664 01:14:40,457 --> 01:14:42,368 you're never never never never ever gonna part 1665 01:14:42,560 --> 01:14:44,631 And chapter three, remember... 1666 01:14:44,828 --> 01:14:46,637 the meaning of romance 1667 01:14:46,830 --> 01:14:48,639 And chapter four, you break up 1668 01:14:48,832 --> 01:14:50,607 But you give her just one more chance 1669 01:14:50,801 --> 01:14:54,442 Oh, I wonder, wonder, whom-ba-doo-hoo-whom 1670 01:14:54,638 --> 01:14:57,551 Who wrote the book of love? 1671 01:14:57,808 --> 01:15:01,119 I wonder who 1672 01:15:01,312 --> 01:15:02,222 Yeah. 1673 01:15:02,313 --> 01:15:07,386 Who wrote the book of love? 1674 01:15:09,485 --> 01:15:11,431 Thank you. 1675 01:15:12,855 --> 01:15:13,390 Grandma? 1676 01:15:13,590 --> 01:15:15,467 We're down here. 1677 01:15:17,560 --> 01:15:18,937 Oh, boy. 1678 01:15:19,128 --> 01:15:21,438 Oh, Harper. Oh, this is great. 1679 01:15:22,098 --> 01:15:23,076 Wait, my camera. 1680 01:15:23,266 --> 01:15:24,506 Okay. 1681 01:15:28,037 --> 01:15:30,244 Oh, honey, you look so great! 1682 01:15:31,774 --> 01:15:32,582 Thank you. 1683 01:15:32,775 --> 01:15:33,753 You look so beautiful. 1684 01:15:33,943 --> 01:15:35,943 Artie, what do you think of your granddaughter now? 1685 01:15:40,383 --> 01:15:41,862 Doesn't she look like her mom? 1686 01:15:42,051 --> 01:15:43,496 Just like her mom. 1687 01:15:44,687 --> 01:15:46,166 Hey, it stopped raining. 1688 01:15:46,356 --> 01:15:49,200 Carl says we should go outside and play again! 1689 01:15:49,392 --> 01:15:51,133 Oh, no, Barker, it's too muddy. 1690 01:15:51,327 --> 01:15:52,931 But he wants to. 1691 01:15:53,129 --> 01:15:55,473 Barker, remember what we talked about? 1692 01:15:55,832 --> 01:15:59,040 You're the boss of Carl. You tell him what to do. 1693 01:16:02,070 --> 01:16:03,606 We can't go out now, Carl. 1694 01:16:05,173 --> 01:16:06,777 Carl, no! 1695 01:16:07,109 --> 01:16:08,679 - Stop! - What's wrong? 1696 01:16:08,877 --> 01:16:12,017 He ran away. He said he's never coming back. 1697 01:16:12,214 --> 01:16:14,160 Oh, he'll come back. He has to pick up his mail. 1698 01:16:14,349 --> 01:16:15,487 Yeah, mail. 1699 01:16:15,584 --> 01:16:16,790 Makes sense. 1700 01:16:18,720 --> 01:16:20,165 - Barker! - Carl! 1701 01:16:20,255 --> 01:16:21,199 Artie, get him. 1702 01:16:21,289 --> 01:16:23,166 Barker has left without adult supervision. 1703 01:16:23,358 --> 01:16:25,463 Carl, don't go! 1704 01:16:26,461 --> 01:16:27,439 Barker! 1705 01:16:27,529 --> 01:16:28,530 Goodbye, Artie Decker. 1706 01:16:28,630 --> 01:16:29,802 Barker! 1707 01:16:38,040 --> 01:16:39,849 How many heart attacks can you give me? 1708 01:16:40,208 --> 01:16:41,186 Oh, no, no, no! 1709 01:16:41,376 --> 01:16:42,787 - Barker, are you okay? - He's fine. 1710 01:16:44,146 --> 01:16:45,216 What, are you hurt? 1711 01:16:45,414 --> 01:16:47,155 Look, can't you see? 1712 01:16:47,416 --> 01:16:50,488 He's dead, the car killed him! Carl is dead! 1713 01:16:50,686 --> 01:16:53,188 What? No! I killed Carl? 1714 01:16:53,554 --> 01:16:55,397 Oh, honey, he's fine. He's just dazed. 1715 01:16:55,589 --> 01:16:57,269 Yeah, yeah. Carl, you're okay, aren't you? 1716 01:16:57,324 --> 01:16:58,964 Yeah, I'm all right, mate. I'm all right! 1717 01:16:59,093 --> 01:17:00,902 - That wasn't Carl, that was you! - Shut up! 1718 01:17:01,095 --> 01:17:02,574 No, he's not all right! 1719 01:17:02,997 --> 01:17:05,500 He's dead! He's mushed all over the road. 1720 01:17:05,700 --> 01:17:08,237 His head is here and his body's over there! 1721 01:17:08,436 --> 01:17:12,248 It's your fault! You made me get into a fight with him! 1722 01:17:12,440 --> 01:17:14,442 We are so past weird. 1723 01:17:15,609 --> 01:17:17,054 I love Carl! 1724 01:17:17,244 --> 01:17:19,383 I even pack extra fortune cookies for him! 1725 01:17:19,580 --> 01:17:21,651 Excuse me, what's Chinese for mental case? 1726 01:17:22,950 --> 01:17:24,088 Hello? 1727 01:17:30,791 --> 01:17:32,952 We were cruising and heard the alarm. Is everyone okay? 1728 01:17:32,960 --> 01:17:33,700 Yes. 1729 01:17:33,894 --> 01:17:36,602 No, he's dead! The car killed him! 1730 01:17:36,797 --> 01:17:38,674 He came out of nowhere! 1731 01:17:38,866 --> 01:17:40,539 Officer, you're wasting your time. 1732 01:17:40,735 --> 01:17:42,296 What happened? Why are the police here? 1733 01:17:42,436 --> 01:17:43,744 Why is the alarm on? 1734 01:17:43,938 --> 01:17:45,177 - Oh, hi! - Mommy! 1735 01:17:45,371 --> 01:17:46,645 - Was there a break-in? - It's nothing. 1736 01:17:46,840 --> 01:17:49,878 It's absolutely nothing. What are you doing home? 1737 01:17:50,076 --> 01:17:51,214 I killed Carl! 1738 01:17:51,411 --> 01:17:53,186 - What? - You killed Carl? How? 1739 01:17:53,379 --> 01:17:55,552 Who is Carl? Is he a family member? 1740 01:17:55,749 --> 01:17:56,591 - Yes! - No! 1741 01:17:56,783 --> 01:17:58,421 He's a kangaroo! 1742 01:17:58,618 --> 01:17:59,528 He's a what? 1743 01:17:59,719 --> 01:18:00,857 Turner, your eye! 1744 01:18:01,054 --> 01:18:02,226 How did that happen? 1745 01:18:02,889 --> 01:18:03,867 Artie did it? 1746 01:18:04,090 --> 01:18:07,594 Oh, no, no, no. Ivan's sister did it. I did that. 1747 01:18:07,794 --> 01:18:08,772 You hit Mom? 1748 01:18:08,862 --> 01:18:09,897 It was an accident! 1749 01:18:10,096 --> 01:18:11,336 Ma'am, would you like to file a complaint? 1750 01:18:11,531 --> 01:18:12,532 No! 1751 01:18:12,632 --> 01:18:13,702 We were playing a game. 1752 01:18:13,800 --> 01:18:15,279 That's the dress. 1753 01:18:15,468 --> 01:18:16,708 Does she have make-up on? 1754 01:18:17,971 --> 01:18:19,211 Don't growl at us. 1755 01:18:19,405 --> 01:18:20,245 This is unbelievable. 1756 01:18:20,406 --> 01:18:22,579 We leave and she's 12, we come home and she's 16. 1757 01:18:22,942 --> 01:18:23,920 Boys, go in the house. 1758 01:18:24,110 --> 01:18:25,680 Turner, turn off the alarm, please. 1759 01:18:25,879 --> 01:18:27,586 You know, you're not supposed to be back until tomorrow. 1760 01:18:27,781 --> 01:18:29,522 Well, we were just so curious... 1761 01:18:29,716 --> 01:18:32,720 as to why Barker was nearly killed this morning at the X Games! 1762 01:18:32,919 --> 01:18:34,523 Get your taser ready. 1763 01:18:35,421 --> 01:18:36,399 That's not right. 1764 01:18:36,589 --> 01:18:38,693 Barker was at a play date this morning with Artie. 1765 01:18:38,891 --> 01:18:39,801 Yeah? 1766 01:18:43,495 --> 01:18:45,532 I was in a little bind... 1767 01:18:45,731 --> 01:18:48,041 and I had to take him with me on some business. 1768 01:18:48,233 --> 01:18:49,974 What business did you have at the X Games? 1769 01:18:50,169 --> 01:18:52,149 Yeah, Artie, what business? 1770 01:18:59,611 --> 01:19:01,648 Aren't we forgetting the most serious issue here? 1771 01:19:01,847 --> 01:19:02,882 What issue? 1772 01:19:02,981 --> 01:19:05,257 The death of an imaginary kangaroo. 1773 01:19:05,450 --> 01:19:06,451 He's imaginary? 1774 01:19:06,652 --> 01:19:07,630 Yes! 1775 01:19:09,822 --> 01:19:10,800 You can go. 1776 01:19:15,761 --> 01:19:18,264 Would someone please explain what happened to Carl? 1777 01:19:18,463 --> 01:19:19,703 We were playing Kick the Can... 1778 01:19:19,865 --> 01:19:22,141 and it started to rain, so we all came indoors... 1779 01:19:22,334 --> 01:19:24,837 and I was helping Harper get dressed for her party. 1780 01:19:25,037 --> 01:19:26,983 A party? You're throwing a party? 1781 01:19:27,172 --> 01:19:27,972 No, Dad, I'm going to a party. 1782 01:19:27,973 --> 01:19:28,576 No, Dad, I'm going to a party. 1783 01:19:28,774 --> 01:19:29,752 For a boy who likes her. 1784 01:19:29,942 --> 01:19:31,579 A boy? What boy? 1785 01:19:31,776 --> 01:19:34,188 The night before your audition? Are you kidding? 1786 01:19:34,378 --> 01:19:35,516 I told her she could go. 1787 01:19:35,713 --> 01:19:38,694 It's ridiculous. It is out of the question. 1788 01:19:38,883 --> 01:19:40,760 Maybe it's ridiculous for me to spend 1789 01:19:40,852 --> 01:19:42,695 all my time practicing the violin... 1790 01:19:42,887 --> 01:19:46,357 never doing anything else and auditioning for a school tomorrow... 1791 01:19:46,557 --> 01:19:48,537 where I'm never going to do anything else 1792 01:19:48,626 --> 01:19:50,537 the whole rest of my life. 1793 01:19:55,199 --> 01:19:56,974 Well, she's using her words. 1794 01:19:57,168 --> 01:20:00,377 Harper. Harper! I cannot allow you to take a talent... 1795 01:20:00,571 --> 01:20:03,780 a gift to which you have dedicated so much time and effort... 1796 01:20:03,975 --> 01:20:06,285 and throw it away on a whim. 1797 01:20:06,477 --> 01:20:09,481 I hate you and I wish anyone else was my mother! 1798 01:20:11,048 --> 01:20:12,994 Maybe not those words. 1799 01:20:13,384 --> 01:20:14,556 Thanks, Mom and Dad. 1800 01:20:14,752 --> 01:20:16,792 I couldn't have gotten through the week without you. 1801 01:20:23,159 --> 01:20:24,760 I say we head for the airport right now. 1802 01:20:24,928 --> 01:20:27,534 Don't even take our clothes we just skedaddle. 1803 01:20:31,401 --> 01:20:34,405 I followed you for 35 years, Artie. 1804 01:20:37,374 --> 01:20:41,754 Wherever you needed to be, that's where I was. 1805 01:20:42,612 --> 01:20:44,649 No complaints. 1806 01:20:46,416 --> 01:20:48,692 Well, some. 1807 01:20:51,054 --> 01:20:52,897 But this week... 1808 01:20:54,024 --> 01:20:57,198 This week was supposed to be about us and our grandchildren. 1809 01:20:58,228 --> 01:21:00,174 Not you. 1810 01:21:01,865 --> 01:21:03,401 Not you. 1811 01:21:07,003 --> 01:21:10,212 Did you have to go to that audition? 1812 01:21:11,975 --> 01:21:14,717 It's not one of my better moments. 1813 01:21:18,147 --> 01:21:20,650 For one wonderful hour... 1814 01:21:22,084 --> 01:21:26,897 we weren't the "other" grandparents. 1815 01:21:30,993 --> 01:21:32,472 There you are. 1816 01:21:33,629 --> 01:21:35,267 You okay? 1817 01:21:36,865 --> 01:21:39,471 I've had better Mommy days. 1818 01:21:40,302 --> 01:21:44,148 You know, it may not have been horrible to let her go to that party. 1819 01:21:44,340 --> 01:21:45,751 I know. 1820 01:21:45,941 --> 01:21:48,979 I just walked into that scene and I freaked. 1821 01:21:51,380 --> 01:21:53,189 I can't believe my parents killed Carl. 1822 01:21:53,716 --> 01:21:56,162 Well, I was thinking about that. 1823 01:21:56,352 --> 01:22:00,596 You know, they didn't kill Carl, only Barker could do that. 1824 01:22:02,057 --> 01:22:06,802 And it somehow took us not being here for him to do it. 1825 01:22:08,397 --> 01:22:10,637 So, what's your point? 1826 01:22:11,866 --> 01:22:14,176 Maybe we coddle him too much. 1827 01:22:15,136 --> 01:22:17,844 Maybe he needed a little tough love... 1828 01:22:18,039 --> 01:22:20,110 to let go of his imaginary friend. 1829 01:22:20,308 --> 01:22:24,950 But, Phil, that would make my father right. 1830 01:22:25,413 --> 01:22:27,984 Yeah. We can't have any of that. 1831 01:22:30,985 --> 01:22:31,827 Harper? 1832 01:22:35,590 --> 01:22:36,796 I could come back. 1833 01:22:36,991 --> 01:22:39,130 No, no, no, it's okay. 1834 01:22:39,327 --> 01:22:41,307 I'm going to check on Barker. 1835 01:22:43,831 --> 01:22:45,504 Thanks, Phil. 1836 01:22:53,674 --> 01:22:54,652 I'm sorry. 1837 01:22:58,246 --> 01:22:59,384 For what? 1838 01:22:59,580 --> 01:23:01,150 Narrow it down for me, Dad. 1839 01:23:01,349 --> 01:23:02,725 For this week. 1840 01:23:04,351 --> 01:23:06,262 For almost getting Barker hurt today. 1841 01:23:06,353 --> 01:23:08,196 I just feel terrible about that. 1842 01:23:10,257 --> 01:23:12,066 What were you even doing there? 1843 01:23:18,065 --> 01:23:20,773 I was on an audition. 1844 01:23:21,635 --> 01:23:23,637 Because the Grizzlies fired me. 1845 01:23:24,838 --> 01:23:26,374 What? 1846 01:23:27,841 --> 01:23:29,047 Why didn't you tell us? 1847 01:23:29,242 --> 01:23:30,380 Because it's humiliating. 1848 01:23:30,577 --> 01:23:32,079 Why would they do that? 1849 01:23:32,279 --> 01:23:34,122 You're so good at that job. 1850 01:23:34,981 --> 01:23:35,959 Maybe not good enough. 1851 01:23:38,518 --> 01:23:39,895 Alice... 1852 01:23:40,854 --> 01:23:42,014 your mom was really hoping... 1853 01:23:42,022 --> 01:23:45,435 that this trip would help bring her closer to her grandchildren. 1854 01:23:46,259 --> 01:23:47,966 And she and Harper have developed 1855 01:23:48,061 --> 01:23:51,065 a relationship that's kind of great... 1856 01:23:51,331 --> 01:23:55,301 and I don't want to see that end just because I screwed up. 1857 01:24:00,339 --> 01:24:01,875 What about you? 1858 01:24:02,308 --> 01:24:04,618 Don't you want a relationship with your grandchildren? 1859 01:24:04,810 --> 01:24:06,517 Of course I do. 1860 01:24:06,712 --> 01:24:08,123 I mean... 1861 01:24:08,314 --> 01:24:12,194 like an hour before you came home, it was really good. 1862 01:24:13,152 --> 01:24:15,257 It's just that sometimes... 1863 01:24:17,223 --> 01:24:18,930 I don't feel... 1864 01:24:19,325 --> 01:24:20,497 What? 1865 01:24:20,860 --> 01:24:24,535 Welcome, here. 1866 01:24:30,236 --> 01:24:32,341 What happened to us, Dad? 1867 01:24:36,142 --> 01:24:38,679 How old were you when Harper was born? 1868 01:24:38,911 --> 01:24:40,185 Twenty-six. 1869 01:24:40,379 --> 01:24:41,700 Did you know what you were doing? 1870 01:24:42,014 --> 01:24:43,015 No. 1871 01:24:43,983 --> 01:24:46,896 I was 23 when you came along. 1872 01:24:47,085 --> 01:24:50,726 And I was terrified, because you didn't come with any instructions. 1873 01:24:50,922 --> 01:24:52,731 And I thought I was doing okay. 1874 01:24:52,924 --> 01:24:57,236 Because unlike my father, I wasn't constantly telling you... 1875 01:24:57,428 --> 01:25:00,409 what an annoying little waste of time you were... 1876 01:25:00,598 --> 01:25:02,669 and believe me, I'm cleaning that up. 1877 01:25:02,867 --> 01:25:05,677 And I thought that we were actually having fun. 1878 01:25:05,870 --> 01:25:09,340 Me and the weather girl... 1879 01:25:09,541 --> 01:25:13,148 and the cutest little girl you ever saw, traveling around the country. 1880 01:25:13,344 --> 01:25:16,223 But then years go by, and your daughter goes off to college... 1881 01:25:16,414 --> 01:25:20,055 and she doesn't come home for Thanksgiving or Christmas. 1882 01:25:21,119 --> 01:25:22,655 Or summers. 1883 01:25:22,854 --> 01:25:24,197 Or ever. 1884 01:25:24,889 --> 01:25:28,166 And you get these clues, this inkling... 1885 01:25:28,359 --> 01:25:31,465 that perhaps all those years she wasn't having such a good time... 1886 01:25:31,663 --> 01:25:36,703 and that maybe she thought you didn't do such a good job. 1887 01:25:36,901 --> 01:25:39,780 And that really hurts. Doesn't it? 1888 01:25:42,439 --> 01:25:44,112 Yes. 1889 01:25:44,474 --> 01:25:47,944 So, little girl, I have to give you three put-ups. 1890 01:25:49,313 --> 01:25:50,291 - No, Dad. - Please. 1891 01:25:50,480 --> 01:25:51,390 It's okay. 1892 01:25:51,582 --> 01:25:55,052 Harper, Turner, Barker. 1893 01:25:55,252 --> 01:25:57,732 They're great kids and you're a really good mother. 1894 01:25:58,655 --> 01:25:59,656 Yeah. 1895 01:25:59,856 --> 01:26:02,598 I'm basking in the glow of my children's affection. 1896 01:26:02,793 --> 01:26:04,898 Harper? She didn't mean anything. 1897 01:26:05,095 --> 01:26:06,403 I mean, she's 12. 1898 01:26:06,597 --> 01:26:08,599 Get ready, it's going to get a lot worse. 1899 01:26:09,833 --> 01:26:13,645 Only, don't let her turn her back on you. 1900 01:26:13,837 --> 01:26:15,783 Because that will break your heart. 1901 01:26:18,809 --> 01:26:19,981 Harper? 1902 01:26:21,812 --> 01:26:22,790 No. 1903 01:26:23,814 --> 01:26:28,092 Barker has a special request for tomorrow, before the audition. 1904 01:26:28,685 --> 01:26:30,756 And it involves all of us. 1905 01:26:47,270 --> 01:26:50,979 Carl, your two favorite things were milk and tofu dogs. 1906 01:26:51,173 --> 01:26:53,653 Now, you can have both forever. 1907 01:27:11,193 --> 01:27:13,764 Grandma, thanks for decorating the box. 1908 01:27:14,030 --> 01:27:17,034 Oh, honey, it was my pleasure. 1909 01:27:20,069 --> 01:27:21,878 Carl... 1910 01:27:22,071 --> 01:27:24,551 Can Artie say something nice for Carl? 1911 01:27:24,740 --> 01:27:25,911 Me? 1912 01:27:35,550 --> 01:27:36,528 How do you... 1913 01:27:38,053 --> 01:27:41,125 I'm sorry, Carl. 1914 01:27:41,323 --> 01:27:43,929 He died so young. 1915 01:27:45,994 --> 01:27:49,271 How do you say goodbye to somebody you could never say hello to? 1916 01:27:49,464 --> 01:27:50,704 It's hard. 1917 01:27:52,000 --> 01:27:53,604 I didn't get to see Carl very often, 1918 01:27:53,702 --> 01:27:55,272 but then again, nobody else did. 1919 01:27:56,938 --> 01:27:59,418 Except for Barker... 1920 01:27:59,607 --> 01:28:02,383 which is what made him so special. 1921 01:28:03,345 --> 01:28:07,657 Carl wasn't just Barker's friend, he was a part of him. 1922 01:28:07,849 --> 01:28:11,092 And that made him a part of all of us. 1923 01:28:13,588 --> 01:28:16,899 Carl, you will forever be in our hearts. 1924 01:28:17,592 --> 01:28:19,298 Keep on hopping, buddy. 1925 01:28:47,821 --> 01:28:48,629 Okay. 1926 01:28:48,822 --> 01:28:51,132 Alice, you take Harper backstage. We'll grab some seats. 1927 01:28:51,325 --> 01:28:52,303 Barker, Turner, you're with us. 1928 01:28:52,526 --> 01:28:53,726 - Good luck. - Knock them dead. 1929 01:28:53,861 --> 01:28:54,839 Thanks. 1930 01:28:55,028 --> 01:28:56,336 Break a leg. 1931 01:28:56,530 --> 01:28:57,941 Bye, Dad. 1932 01:29:20,319 --> 01:29:22,424 Don't applaud. That's that woman! 1933 01:29:23,189 --> 01:29:24,463 Good evening. 1934 01:29:24,690 --> 01:29:28,797 Welcome family, friends and distinguished judges... 1935 01:29:28,995 --> 01:29:31,601 to the Atlanta Performing Arts Center. 1936 01:29:31,798 --> 01:29:34,108 I am Doctor Schveer. 1937 01:29:37,170 --> 01:29:41,016 We have 74 amazingly talented musicians... 1938 01:29:41,207 --> 01:29:45,678 all vying for one position at this prestigious conservatory. 1939 01:29:45,878 --> 01:29:48,518 So, without further ado I give you 1940 01:29:48,614 --> 01:29:51,220 Chet Halloran on the saxophone 1941 01:29:51,417 --> 01:29:53,795 Yeah! Go Chet! 1942 01:30:22,180 --> 01:30:24,751 Hang on a second, honey. 1943 01:30:29,221 --> 01:30:32,168 You know, when you were just five years old... 1944 01:30:32,357 --> 01:30:34,928 we took you to that little music school for the first time. 1945 01:30:35,126 --> 01:30:38,903 And all the other kids they were just banging on things. 1946 01:30:39,965 --> 01:30:42,571 One kid tried to play another kid. 1947 01:30:43,568 --> 01:30:47,380 But from that very first day, you played. 1948 01:30:47,739 --> 01:30:49,275 And not just played... 1949 01:30:49,474 --> 01:30:52,717 you had this look of such fulfillment on your face. 1950 01:30:52,978 --> 01:30:55,117 And I said to your dad, "Whatever it takes..." 1951 01:30:55,313 --> 01:30:57,155 "whatever we have to do, I always" 1952 01:30:57,248 --> 01:30:59,728 "want to see that look on her face." 1953 01:31:01,218 --> 01:31:03,721 Lately, I'm not seeing it. 1954 01:31:04,622 --> 01:31:08,434 So, honey, do you really not want to switch schools again? 1955 01:31:11,762 --> 01:31:12,900 Okay. 1956 01:31:13,664 --> 01:31:15,803 What do you say we ditch this audition? 1957 01:31:17,434 --> 01:31:18,504 Really? 1958 01:31:18,702 --> 01:31:21,478 Yeah. It's okay. 1959 01:31:24,041 --> 01:31:26,146 Mommy, I didn't mean what I said. 1960 01:31:27,011 --> 01:31:28,513 Oh, baby. 1961 01:31:29,179 --> 01:31:32,649 I wouldn't want anyone else to be my mom. 1962 01:31:32,850 --> 01:31:34,659 And I love you. 1963 01:31:34,852 --> 01:31:38,265 That's good because you're my only daughter. 1964 01:31:38,622 --> 01:31:42,661 And you know, I don't really understand the boys. 1965 01:31:42,860 --> 01:31:45,966 I know. How weird are they? 1966 01:31:48,899 --> 01:31:50,002 Yeah, yeah! 1967 01:31:50,199 --> 01:31:51,200 Hi, baby. 1968 01:31:52,969 --> 01:31:58,043 We regret to inform you of a slight change in our program. 1969 01:31:58,241 --> 01:32:00,221 Harper Simmons has forfeited her slot... 1970 01:32:02,545 --> 01:32:04,024 and her future. 1971 01:32:04,213 --> 01:32:06,489 Since the next performer is warming up... 1972 01:32:06,683 --> 01:32:08,663 we're going to have to take a 10 minute break. 1973 01:32:12,055 --> 01:32:13,500 Hey, what's going on? 1974 01:32:13,590 --> 01:32:15,263 She's not going to audition. 1975 01:32:15,458 --> 01:32:17,019 You're not disappointed in me, are you? 1976 01:32:17,193 --> 01:32:19,673 Oh, no, no, no. That's not even a possibility. 1977 01:32:19,862 --> 01:32:21,773 Is this is all my fault? It is, isn't it? 1978 01:32:21,965 --> 01:32:24,002 I came 3,000 miles to ruin my granddaughter's life. 1979 01:32:24,200 --> 01:32:25,042 It's not your fault. 1980 01:32:25,234 --> 01:32:26,941 - Really? - It was our choice. 1981 01:32:27,136 --> 01:32:28,012 I love you. 1982 01:32:28,204 --> 01:32:29,979 Here, take my picture, Phil. 1983 01:32:30,907 --> 01:32:31,851 Get in there. 1984 01:32:39,148 --> 01:32:40,024 Where's Turner? 1985 01:32:40,216 --> 01:32:41,456 You! Kid! 1986 01:32:44,186 --> 01:32:45,392 Turner! 1987 01:32:53,095 --> 01:32:55,132 Bobby Thomson, up there swinging. 1988 01:32:55,697 --> 01:32:57,335 He's had two out of three, a single and a double... 1989 01:32:57,532 --> 01:33:00,308 and Billy Cox is playing him right an the third base line. 1990 01:33:00,502 --> 01:33:02,914 One out, last of the ninth. Branca pitches. 1991 01:33:03,105 --> 01:33:06,484 Bobby Thomson takes a strike called on the inside corner. 1992 01:33:06,675 --> 01:33:08,586 Bobby hitting at .292. 1993 01:33:08,777 --> 01:33:09,653 He's had a single and a double“ 1994 01:33:09,845 --> 01:33:13,918 and he drove in the Giants first run with a long fly to center. 1995 01:33:14,116 --> 01:33:15,720 Lockman without too big of a lead at second... 1996 01:33:15,917 --> 01:33:18,727 but he 'll be running like the wind if Thomson hits one. 1997 01:33:18,920 --> 01:33:19,990 Branca throws. 1998 01:33:20,188 --> 01:33:22,225 There's a long drive! It's gonna be, I believe... 1999 01:33:22,424 --> 01:33:26,236 The Giants win the pennant! The Giants win the pennant! 2000 01:33:26,428 --> 01:33:28,271 The Giants win the pennant! 2001 01:33:28,463 --> 01:33:30,238 The Giants win the pennant... 2002 01:33:30,432 --> 01:33:32,173 and they're going crazy. 2003 01:33:32,367 --> 01:33:34,040 They're going crazy! 2004 01:33:34,236 --> 01:33:37,011 And home! 2005 01:33:37,204 --> 01:33:38,765 I don't believe it! I don't believe it! 2006 01:33:39,473 --> 01:33:40,781 I do not believe it! 2007 01:33:40,975 --> 01:33:43,285 Bobby Thomson hit a line drive... 2008 01:33:43,477 --> 01:33:46,253 into the lower deck of the left field stands“ 2009 01:33:46,447 --> 01:33:49,018 and the place is going crazy! 2010 01:33:49,216 --> 01:33:52,959 The Giants won it by a score of 5 to 4... 2011 01:33:53,154 --> 01:33:55,464 and they're picking Bobby Thomson up 2012 01:33:55,556 --> 01:33:57,797 and carrying him off the field! 2013 01:34:01,495 --> 01:34:03,475 Yeah! Yeah! 2014 01:34:12,773 --> 01:34:15,982 I saw it. I saw it, Artie. 2015 01:34:16,577 --> 01:34:18,454 Call me Grandpa. 2016 01:34:23,250 --> 01:34:26,390 My big boy. How on earth...? 2017 01:34:26,587 --> 01:34:28,065 Grandpa taught me. 2018 01:34:37,430 --> 01:34:39,637 Your father was wrong. 2019 01:34:41,468 --> 01:34:42,970 So was yours. 2020 01:34:47,474 --> 01:34:48,316 Oh, Al. 2021 01:34:52,812 --> 01:34:55,986 How much would it embarrass you if I kissed you right now? 2022 01:34:56,316 --> 01:34:57,454 I think a lot. 2023 01:34:57,650 --> 01:34:58,822 As soon as we get home. 2024 01:34:59,018 --> 01:35:00,361 Okay, I look forward to it. 2025 01:35:00,553 --> 01:35:02,863 Dr. Schveer, I shun you. 2026 01:35:03,056 --> 01:35:04,933 You are shunned. 2027 01:35:07,660 --> 01:35:10,060 My friends, it's taken me over 35 years to say these words... 2028 01:35:10,230 --> 01:35:11,732 it's opening day for the Giants 2029 01:35:11,831 --> 01:35:13,310 and we've got a capacity crowd. 2030 01:35:13,500 --> 01:35:15,673 Giants are out in the field. There's Charlie "The Naz" Naznic... 2031 01:35:15,869 --> 01:35:18,145 batting .290, takes his stance at the plate. 2032 01:35:18,338 --> 01:35:21,318 Yes, Art. Let's see if Naz can get his team out of a jam. 2033 01:35:21,507 --> 01:35:23,111 Okay, Turner, here's the action. 2034 01:35:23,342 --> 01:35:24,218 Naz swings! 2035 01:35:24,409 --> 01:35:25,609 He gets some wood on that one! 2036 01:35:25,644 --> 01:35:26,850 Hard drive to Barker Simmons. 2037 01:35:26,979 --> 01:35:28,014 It's through his legs. 2038 01:35:28,213 --> 01:35:29,783 Walters has it. No, Walters loses it. 2039 01:35:30,883 --> 01:35:33,523 Sherman's got a glove down. No, he stopped to pick his nose. 2040 01:35:33,719 --> 01:35:35,995 Now, Douglas is sitting down and taking off his shoes... 2041 01:35:36,188 --> 01:35:37,948 because his mom said to me before the game... 2042 01:35:38,090 --> 01:35:39,831 "Sometimes he's in another world." 2043 01:35:40,025 --> 01:35:41,663 Sherman still working on that thing in his nose. 2044 01:35:41,860 --> 01:35:43,635 Man, that must be really packed in there! 2045 01:35:43,829 --> 01:35:44,739 You betcha! 2046 01:35:44,930 --> 01:35:46,000 Naz rounds second, heads for third. 2047 01:35:46,198 --> 01:35:48,337 Sherman has the booger! Sherman has the booger! 2048 01:35:48,534 --> 01:35:51,572 I don't believe it! I do not believe it! 2049 01:35:51,770 --> 01:35:53,374 The other players are coming over to examine it. 2050 01:35:53,572 --> 01:35:55,210 I can see it from here! 2051 01:35:55,407 --> 01:35:58,013 You could take an aerial photograph of that thing! 2052 01:35:58,210 --> 01:36:01,214 I'm sure there's going to be orange slices in the locker room... 2053 01:36:01,413 --> 01:36:02,373 and a couple of tissues. 2054 01:36:02,414 --> 01:36:05,486 Meanwhile, Naz scores. And that is another home run! 2055 01:36:06,451 --> 01:36:10,763 The Giants are still leading, 34 to 27. 2056 01:36:10,956 --> 01:36:12,162 What a first inning! 2057 01:36:12,357 --> 01:36:13,199 You're telling me. 2058 01:36:13,392 --> 01:36:15,098 I hope the second inning is shorter 2059 01:36:15,193 --> 01:36:16,866 because grandpa needs a bathroom break. 2060 01:36:17,195 --> 01:36:19,175 Go Barker! 2061 01:36:19,363 --> 01:36:20,671 Our next batter is coming up to the plate. 2062 01:36:20,865 --> 01:36:23,072 He's number three, Barker Simmons. 2063 01:36:23,267 --> 01:36:25,372 Yeah, Barker! 2064 01:36:25,603 --> 01:36:29,176 Young man with incredible power. Three-foot-four and 45 pounds. 2065 01:36:30,241 --> 01:36:32,744 He hits it to shortstop. Oh, it's through! 2066 01:36:32,944 --> 01:36:34,305 Barker heading towards first base. 2067 01:36:34,378 --> 01:36:35,516 No, he makes a right turn! 2068 01:36:35,713 --> 01:36:37,386 He makes a right turn. 2069 01:36:37,582 --> 01:36:38,617 Barker, go back! 2070 01:36:38,716 --> 01:36:40,195 He's going the wrong way. 2071 01:36:40,918 --> 01:36:42,226 What are you doing here? 2072 01:36:42,420 --> 01:36:44,127 I just wanted to say hi. 2073 01:36:44,322 --> 01:36:46,393 He just wanted to say hi. 2074 01:36:46,591 --> 01:36:48,111 Well, I don't think I've ever heard... 2075 01:36:48,226 --> 01:36:49,866 Turn around, everybody. Take our picture. 2076 01:36:49,961 --> 01:36:51,599 Okay, picture. 2077 01:37:04,675 --> 01:37:06,813 I got to tell you friends, this is one of those days. 2078 01:37:07,010 --> 01:37:09,991 Seventy-eight degrees, the sold out crowd of 56 fans... 2079 01:37:10,180 --> 01:37:12,091 the smell of the popcorn, the hot dogs“ 2080 01:37:12,282 --> 01:37:14,762 the loud pushy parents, and the crying kids. 2081 01:37:14,951 --> 01:37:17,830 But I'll tell you something, there's no other place I'd rather be. 2082 01:37:18,021 --> 01:37:20,433 Andes my grandson Barker said to me this morning... 2083 01:37:20,624 --> 01:37:22,729 "Man, your feet smell like cheese. " 2084 01:37:22,926 --> 01:37:25,065 This is Artie Decker, De Voice of the Peewee Giants.. 2085 01:37:25,262 --> 01:37:26,297 Saying see you next game! 2086 01:37:26,496 --> 01:37:28,498 And, lights out, Alice. 2087 01:37:28,965 --> 01:37:33,812 ♪ Settle dawn, it'll all be clear 2088 01:37:36,873 --> 01:37:39,683 ♪ Don't pay no mind to the demons 2089 01:37:39,776 --> 01:37:41,722 ♪ They fill you with fear 2090 01:37:44,814 --> 01:37:47,761 ♪ The trouble, it might drag you down 2091 01:37:48,084 --> 01:37:51,497 ♪ If you get lost, you can always be found 2092 01:37:52,555 --> 01:37:55,536 ♪ Just know you're not alone 2093 01:37:57,027 --> 01:38:00,701 ♪ 'Cause I'm going to make this place your home 2094 01:44:31,446 --> 01:44:35,053 Andy? Andy, there's no paper. 2095 01:44:35,250 --> 01:44:37,787 Anyone have five singles for a five?