1
00:00:23,300 --> 00:00:24,700
No answer?
2
00:00:24,600 --> 00:00:27,400
-Must be out shopping.
-God forbid.
3
00:00:27,300 --> 00:00:29,300
-Why do you say that?
-No reason.
4
00:00:29,200 --> 00:00:32,000
It's just something men say
when they talk about their wives.
5
00:00:32,000 --> 00:00:34,900
One guy says,
"She must be out shopping."
6
00:00:34,900 --> 00:00:38,300
The other guys says,
"God forbid."
7
00:00:38,100 --> 00:00:40,800
-It's a joke.
-Oh.
8
00:01:02,000 --> 00:01:04,800
So what do you make
of all this, Bob?
9
00:01:04,700 --> 00:01:08,700
-What do you mean?
-How does it feel to be out on the road?
10
00:01:08,500 --> 00:01:12,900
Well, uh, I can see
where it could be tiring.
11
00:01:12,800 --> 00:01:14,900
Yeah, there's a lot
to this job.
12
00:01:14,900 --> 00:01:17,400
You'd never know it,
but there's a lot to it.
13
00:01:27,200 --> 00:01:30,100
You seem to have been
at this a long time.
14
00:01:30,000 --> 00:01:32,500
Tell you the truth,
Bob,
15
00:01:32,500 --> 00:01:36,900
I feel like I've been shaking somebody's
hand one way or another my entire life.
16
00:01:36,800 --> 00:01:39,800
-You're very good at it.
-Well, thank you, Bob.
17
00:01:39,700 --> 00:01:43,900
-I mean, judging from what I hear.
-Don't qualify it, Bob.
18
00:01:54,600 --> 00:01:57,400
-What time you got?
-Quarter to 5:00.
19
00:01:57,300 --> 00:02:00,800
-Hmm. Wonder if Larry got in.
-Don't you carry a watch?
20
00:02:00,800 --> 00:02:03,800
The world is full
of clocks, Bob.
21
00:02:03,700 --> 00:02:05,700
Clocks and mirrors.
22
00:02:05,600 --> 00:02:07,900
It's a damn conspiracy.
23
00:02:07,900 --> 00:02:09,800
Not that it matters
to me anymore.
24
00:02:09,800 --> 00:02:12,300
All my chances have come and gone
a long time ago.
25
00:02:12,300 --> 00:02:14,600
Why do you say that?
26
00:02:14,600 --> 00:02:17,300
I'm not complainin'.
27
00:02:17,300 --> 00:02:20,200
Everybody peaks somewhere.
People find their niche.
28
00:02:20,200 --> 00:02:22,100
It's nothing
to be ashamed of.
29
00:02:23,000 --> 00:02:24,900
Uh, how old are you?
30
00:02:25,000 --> 00:02:27,200
If you don't mind me asking.
31
00:02:27,100 --> 00:02:29,100
I'm 52.
32
00:02:32,300 --> 00:02:36,100
-Your secretary said you looked distinguished.
-She did?
33
00:02:36,000 --> 00:02:38,100
She said your face
had character.
34
00:02:38,000 --> 00:02:40,800
I will give her
the benefit of the doubt...
35
00:02:40,800 --> 00:02:44,300
and assume she meant that
in a favorable vein.
36
00:02:47,800 --> 00:02:51,800
Sometimes I wonder what I'll look like
when I get to be your age.
37
00:02:52,900 --> 00:02:54,100
Tear my heart out, Bob.
38
00:02:54,100 --> 00:02:57,500
-Oh, no. That's not what I meant.
-That's okay.
39
00:02:57,400 --> 00:03:00,100
I've heard tell of people
living well into their 60s.
40
00:03:00,100 --> 00:03:02,000
I only hope it's true.
41
00:03:02,100 --> 00:03:07,400
A-All I mean is,
I wonder how a person attains character.
42
00:03:07,300 --> 00:03:11,000
Whether it's something that you're born with
that kind of reveals itself over time,
43
00:03:10,800 --> 00:03:14,400
or whether you have to
go through certain things.
44
00:03:14,400 --> 00:03:17,200
I never think about it.
45
00:03:17,100 --> 00:03:21,900
For all I know, I could have a face
full of character and not even know it.
46
00:03:21,800 --> 00:03:24,300
You think?
47
00:03:24,300 --> 00:03:26,800
It's a two-edged sword,
Bob.
48
00:03:26,800 --> 00:03:31,100
-So how long you been with the company?
-Six months.
49
00:03:31,000 --> 00:03:34,000
-Straight out of school?
-Yeah.
50
00:03:34,000 --> 00:03:36,200
Well, a word of advice:
51
00:03:36,200 --> 00:03:39,600
It's never too early to start thinking
about where you want to end up.
52
00:03:39,500 --> 00:03:42,600
-It's a lot to think about.
-Yes, it is.
53
00:03:42,600 --> 00:03:46,800
Pretty soon somebody's gonna be handing you
a cake with 40 candles on it,
54
00:03:46,600 --> 00:03:48,600
maybe 50.
55
00:03:48,500 --> 00:03:52,400
A bunch of people are gonna jump
out of a closet and yell, "Surprise!"
56
00:03:52,200 --> 00:03:56,000
like it's something you haven't been
thinking about every waking moment.
57
00:04:04,900 --> 00:04:08,000
-What's that you're reading?
-Penthouse.
58
00:04:07,900 --> 00:04:09,900
Oh.
59
00:04:09,900 --> 00:04:12,700
-Wanna borrow it when I'm done?
-No, thanks.
60
00:04:12,700 --> 00:04:15,600
-You don't want it?
-No, I don't read magazines like that.
61
00:04:15,600 --> 00:04:17,500
Oh.
62
00:04:17,500 --> 00:04:21,000
Are you one of those that believe that
magazines like this shouldn't be published?
63
00:04:20,900 --> 00:04:23,900
I'm one of those who believes
they shouldn't be purchased.
64
00:04:23,900 --> 00:04:27,700
That was a very clever
answer, Bob.
65
00:04:27,600 --> 00:04:29,500
I just said
what I thought.
66
00:04:29,600 --> 00:04:32,400
That's what I mean.
You did it without thinking.
67
00:04:32,300 --> 00:04:36,100
Which leads me to believe
you could have a career in marketing.
68
00:04:44,800 --> 00:04:47,900
What's your wife say about you
reading magazines like that?
69
00:04:51,500 --> 00:04:54,200
It's not
my wife's concern.
70
00:04:54,100 --> 00:04:57,500
-It's not?
-No.
71
00:04:58,800 --> 00:05:01,400
We're divorced.
72
00:05:01,400 --> 00:05:03,900
Mind if I ask you
what the problem was?
73
00:05:06,600 --> 00:05:08,700
Maybe you better try
your wife again, Bob.
74
00:05:08,600 --> 00:05:11,100
S-Sure.
75
00:05:11,100 --> 00:05:14,600
I just have a real hard time imagining
what it must be like to get a divorce.
76
00:05:14,500 --> 00:05:17,100
The picture
becomes perfectly clear...
77
00:05:17,100 --> 00:05:19,300
after a very short
period of time.
78
00:05:21,800 --> 00:05:23,700
Believe me, Bob.
79
00:05:27,700 --> 00:05:30,200
Oh. Excuse me.
80
00:05:31,600 --> 00:05:34,000
-How're you doin'?
-Pretty good. How 'bout yourself?
81
00:05:34,000 --> 00:05:36,000
Can't complain.
What floor?
82
00:05:35,900 --> 00:05:39,100
-Depends on where you're headed with all this food.
-Fifteen.
83
00:05:39,100 --> 00:05:41,100
-Hospitality suite.
-Yeah.
84
00:05:41,000 --> 00:05:44,000
Hmm. Me too.
On 16.
85
00:05:43,900 --> 00:05:46,000
Oh. Yeah.
86
00:06:03,200 --> 00:06:05,700
-This is it?
-Hi, Larry.
87
00:06:05,700 --> 00:06:08,600
This is fucking it?
88
00:06:08,500 --> 00:06:11,000
What do you mean, "This is fucking it"?
Of course it's it.
89
00:06:11,000 --> 00:06:14,100
-What'd you expect?
-Phil, buddy, the operative word was "suite."
90
00:06:14,000 --> 00:06:17,300
Hospitality suite,
not hospitality closet.
91
00:06:17,300 --> 00:06:19,200
There's no room in here.
92
00:06:19,200 --> 00:06:21,100
It's the best
I could do.
93
00:06:21,100 --> 00:06:23,600
Where do you expect people
to stand, out in the hall?
94
00:06:23,600 --> 00:06:27,200
What are you bitching about?
It's on the 16th floor. Look at the view.
95
00:06:27,100 --> 00:06:30,500
Phil, man, we're
in Wichita, Kansas.
96
00:06:30,400 --> 00:06:33,400
What does it matter whether we're on
the first floor or the 500th floor?
97
00:06:33,300 --> 00:06:35,300
It all looks the same.
98
00:06:35,300 --> 00:06:37,600
Next time you make
the arrangements.
99
00:06:37,600 --> 00:06:40,100
-Murdoch would have had a room four times this size.
-Oh, yeah?
100
00:06:40,100 --> 00:06:43,300
-Murdoch's not here, is he?
-You can say that again.
101
00:06:43,300 --> 00:06:46,400
At least we have something
to jump off of when nobody shows.
102
00:06:46,300 --> 00:06:49,400
-Fuck you, Larry.
-See? That's what I get for having aesthetic values.
103
00:06:49,300 --> 00:06:52,200
Foul language
thrown in my face.
104
00:06:52,100 --> 00:06:54,100
You know Bob
from Research?
105
00:06:54,000 --> 00:06:56,700
-Sure, I know Bob. How you doing there, Bob?
-Hi.
106
00:06:56,700 --> 00:06:58,900
He's on the phone
to his wife.
107
00:06:58,900 --> 00:07:01,200
I only hope his wife
does most of the talking.
108
00:07:01,200 --> 00:07:04,100
We've got to conserve
what little oxygen we have.
109
00:07:07,500 --> 00:07:10,400
-What is this?
-What does it look like?
110
00:07:10,400 --> 00:07:13,100
-You tell me.
-It's hors d'oeuvres.
111
00:07:13,100 --> 00:07:17,500
-You call these hors d'oeuvres?
-Don't start with me, Larry.
112
00:07:17,400 --> 00:07:19,700
Phil, buddy, these
are not hors d'oeuvres.
113
00:07:19,700 --> 00:07:21,700
I don't know what that is.
114
00:07:21,700 --> 00:07:24,600
Carrot sticks, celery sticks,
cup of ranch dressing...
115
00:07:24,500 --> 00:07:26,500
and an overgrown
cheese ball?
116
00:07:26,500 --> 00:07:29,100
This-This whole thing was
spur-of-the-moment. You know it.
117
00:07:29,100 --> 00:07:33,600
-Do you know what the tool and dye outfit is serving?
-I don't wanna know.
118
00:07:33,500 --> 00:07:36,000
Shrimp, my friend.
Jumbo shrimp on ice.
119
00:07:36,000 --> 00:07:40,500
Oysters on the half shell.
All these weird kind of French cheeses.
120
00:07:40,400 --> 00:07:43,500
These little puff pastries. That's hors
d'oeuvres, Phil, my friend of many years.
121
00:07:43,500 --> 00:07:47,400
Downstairs they wouldn't let a celery stick
near the place. They'd check it at the door.
122
00:07:47,200 --> 00:07:50,600
-Then go eat downstairs.
-I just might have to.
123
00:07:50,500 --> 00:07:52,900
Jesus Christ!
Bob, can you believe this?
124
00:07:56,100 --> 00:08:00,800
-It looks okay to me.
-That's exactly my point. You don't know anything.
125
00:08:00,700 --> 00:08:03,300
No offense, but how many of these
things have you been to?
126
00:08:03,200 --> 00:08:05,000
-Just one.
-This one, right?
127
00:08:04,900 --> 00:08:07,100
-Yeah.
-Yeah, that's what I thought.
128
00:08:07,000 --> 00:08:09,200
Who knows, Phil?
Maybe we'll get lucky...
129
00:08:09,200 --> 00:08:12,300
and everyone that walks through the door
tonight will be a first-timer like Bob.
130
00:08:14,400 --> 00:08:16,600
Is there a problem?
131
00:08:16,600 --> 00:08:19,100
No.
There's no problem.
132
00:08:21,500 --> 00:08:24,000
Oh, catching up on your technical
reading there, Phil?
133
00:08:24,000 --> 00:08:25,900
Mind your own business,
Larry.
134
00:08:25,900 --> 00:08:28,100
I'm not condemning.
I'm just saying I noticed.
135
00:08:28,100 --> 00:08:30,500
You should have seen the girl
that sat next to me on the plane.
136
00:08:30,500 --> 00:08:32,900
-Pretty?
-I should say so. And built.
137
00:08:32,900 --> 00:08:35,200
And... wearing
a business suit.
138
00:08:36,200 --> 00:08:38,700
That's right. You like 'em
in business suits.
139
00:08:38,600 --> 00:08:41,800
There's something about a woman
in a business suit that drives me wild.
140
00:08:41,800 --> 00:08:44,700
It's as if they'rev all tied up
in this neat little package...
141
00:08:44,700 --> 00:08:49,100
Just waiting for someone to come along
and pull the cord that sets everything free.
142
00:08:48,900 --> 00:08:51,900
A woman in a business suit
is my idea of art.
143
00:08:51,900 --> 00:08:56,500
What about you, Bob? What kind of
woman's attire gets your motor running?
144
00:08:56,400 --> 00:08:59,600
-I'm sure I couldn't tell you.
-No favorites, huh?
145
00:08:59,600 --> 00:09:02,000
Uh, I try not
to think about it.
146
00:09:03,800 --> 00:09:06,100
You try not?
147
00:09:06,100 --> 00:09:08,000
I- I'm married.
148
00:09:08,000 --> 00:09:11,200
Of course you're married. We're all
married. Even Phil was married at one time.
149
00:09:11,200 --> 00:09:13,300
I'm just asking you in which direction
your tastes run.
150
00:09:13,200 --> 00:09:15,800
I... I don't know.
151
00:09:15,700 --> 00:09:18,200
Oh.
152
00:09:18,200 --> 00:09:21,300
Let me, uh, ask you a question there, Bob,
seriously.
153
00:09:21,200 --> 00:09:23,200
-What's that?
-Are you gay?
154
00:09:23,200 --> 00:09:25,800
-Larry!
-What? I'm just asking.
155
00:09:25,800 --> 00:09:28,400
He seems to be missing one of the fundamental
characteristics of the American male,
156
00:09:28,400 --> 00:09:32,200
which I could understand if you were...
you know... but you're not.
157
00:09:32,200 --> 00:09:34,300
Aren't you married?
158
00:09:34,200 --> 00:09:38,000
I just see no reason to let my eyes
go wandering when God's...
159
00:09:37,800 --> 00:09:40,500
given me a wonderful woman
to be my wife.
160
00:09:40,500 --> 00:09:42,700
Oh, I see.
You're a spiritual man.
161
00:09:42,600 --> 00:09:46,400
-That's a part of it.
-So do they blind you when you get saved?
162
00:09:46,400 --> 00:09:51,000
Jesus said if you look at a woman with lust,
it's the same as committing adultery.
163
00:09:50,900 --> 00:09:53,000
He did?
164
00:09:53,000 --> 00:09:56,400
He must have never seen a woman in
a business suit. If He had, who knows?
165
00:09:56,200 --> 00:09:59,700
We might have a different kind of religion,
one where lusting is a sacrament.
166
00:10:03,400 --> 00:10:06,900
Hey! I thought you weren't interested
in my hors d'oeuvres.
167
00:10:06,900 --> 00:10:09,800
I'm just tasting, Phil.
I'm not actually partaking.
168
00:10:09,800 --> 00:10:12,900
I'm just gonna make sure
that nobody's gonna gag.
169
00:10:12,800 --> 00:10:15,700
Well, don't eat
the whole thing up.
170
00:10:15,600 --> 00:10:20,000
-You know why you're here, don't you, Bob?
-No. Not exactly.
171
00:10:19,900 --> 00:10:23,200
Jesus Christ. No wonder this company
is spiralling into the shit can.
172
00:10:23,200 --> 00:10:27,700
-You're here for cosmetic purposes.
-What do you mean?
173
00:10:27,500 --> 00:10:29,900
You're here
to represent research.
174
00:10:29,900 --> 00:10:33,600
Technical support.
The brains of the company.
175
00:10:33,500 --> 00:10:35,700
-Me?
-Absolutely.
176
00:10:35,800 --> 00:10:38,800
-But I don't have that much experience.
-That doesn't matter.
177
00:10:38,700 --> 00:10:41,300
You, as a person, don't really matter.
It's what you represent.
178
00:10:41,300 --> 00:10:44,000
Am I supposed to
be doing anything?
179
00:10:43,900 --> 00:10:47,600
Nope. Just stand there and look wise,
or sit. It's entirely up to you.
180
00:10:47,600 --> 00:10:50,000
You'll do fine, Bob.
181
00:10:51,200 --> 00:10:53,200
Jeez, I hope so.
182
00:10:53,200 --> 00:10:56,400
You know, when you think about it,
to tell the truth,
183
00:10:56,400 --> 00:10:58,300
nobody's really here.
184
00:10:58,300 --> 00:11:01,500
You think you see people walkin' around
those hallways? You don't.
185
00:11:01,400 --> 00:11:05,100
What you see is functions.
That's the nature of a convention.
186
00:11:07,500 --> 00:11:09,800
What Larry means is, um,
187
00:11:09,800 --> 00:11:13,500
if you look at it in the standpoint
of why we're here,
188
00:11:13,400 --> 00:11:15,700
what we are is more important
than who we are.
189
00:11:16,700 --> 00:11:18,600
Well, that seems
kind of impersonal.
190
00:11:18,600 --> 00:11:20,600
Of course
it's impersonal, Bob.
191
00:11:20,600 --> 00:11:23,200
Why do you think they hold conventions
in places like this?
192
00:11:23,200 --> 00:11:27,600
Is there anything about this place
that smacks of personality to you?
193
00:11:28,700 --> 00:11:30,600
Still,
it seems a shame.
194
00:11:30,600 --> 00:11:32,900
It's not a shame, Bob.
195
00:11:45,700 --> 00:11:49,400
-So who do they have you working for these days?
-Uh, Professor Young.
196
00:11:49,200 --> 00:11:51,600
-Jim Young?
-Yeah. You know him?
197
00:11:51,500 --> 00:11:53,600
We've met.
198
00:11:54,600 --> 00:11:56,300
-Tremendous guy.
-Oh, really?
199
00:11:56,300 --> 00:11:58,100
How so?
200
00:11:58,100 --> 00:12:01,900
He's got...
what, 20, 30 patents?
201
00:12:01,800 --> 00:12:04,300
I think he's even
a deacon in his church.
202
00:12:04,300 --> 00:12:06,500
And all that
makes him tremendous?
203
00:12:06,400 --> 00:12:08,900
Well, the patents alone.
204
00:12:08,800 --> 00:12:12,000
Listen, Bob, no offense. I can see
that you admire the man and all.
205
00:12:12,000 --> 00:12:15,200
But let me tell you a little something
about Jim Young.
206
00:12:15,100 --> 00:12:17,500
-What's that?
-He's an idiot!
207
00:12:17,500 --> 00:12:20,100
-What?
-He's a moron, Bob.
208
00:12:20,000 --> 00:12:23,300
-I wouldn't trust the guy to wax my car.
-How can you say that?
209
00:12:23,300 --> 00:12:26,400
I've met him, remember? I've gotten an
earful of Jim on more than one occasion.
210
00:12:26,300 --> 00:12:29,800
I can tell you for a fact
the guy is full of shit.
211
00:12:29,800 --> 00:12:32,300
I don't think so.
I work with him every day.
212
00:12:32,200 --> 00:12:34,200
Maybe you just don't know
what to look for.
213
00:12:34,200 --> 00:12:36,400
Maybe I just have
different standards.
214
00:12:44,600 --> 00:12:47,400
Listen, Bob. You got a minute?
I wanna tell you something.
215
00:12:47,300 --> 00:12:49,200
Sure.
216
00:12:49,300 --> 00:12:52,000
There are people
in this world, Bob,
217
00:12:52,000 --> 00:12:55,500
who look very official
while they're doing what they're doing.
218
00:12:55,400 --> 00:12:57,500
-And do you know why?
-Why?
219
00:12:57,400 --> 00:12:59,400
Because they don't know
what they're doing.
220
00:12:59,400 --> 00:13:02,500
If you know what you're doing, you don't have to
look like you know what you're doing.
221
00:13:02,500 --> 00:13:04,500
-It comes naturally. You follow me?
-Sure.
222
00:13:04,500 --> 00:13:08,900
Okay. So now, do you know how you
can tell the difference?
223
00:13:08,800 --> 00:13:10,400
No.
224
00:13:10,500 --> 00:13:12,900
All right,
the way you tell is...
225
00:13:12,900 --> 00:13:15,500
a little voice pops up
in the back of your mind...
226
00:13:15,500 --> 00:13:19,600
to say that this guy
who's sitting before me, or she,
227
00:13:19,500 --> 00:13:22,800
is lying through his teeth
and telling me stories.
228
00:13:22,600 --> 00:13:25,400
Now, once you get
that little piece of information,
229
00:13:25,300 --> 00:13:27,800
what do you do?
230
00:13:27,800 --> 00:13:29,800
Uh... Uh, I don't know.
231
00:13:29,700 --> 00:13:32,000
Here's what I would do.
232
00:13:32,000 --> 00:13:35,800
I would say, "Buddy, I've heard a lot
of horseshit in my time,
233
00:13:35,800 --> 00:13:37,700
"'cause God knows
I'm a salesman...
234
00:13:37,700 --> 00:13:41,200
"and we all have to wade through our
share of the snow to get to the cabin,
235
00:13:41,200 --> 00:13:45,100
"but you...
take the cake.
236
00:13:44,900 --> 00:13:48,900
"I don't believe you have the first idea
what you're talking about.
237
00:13:48,800 --> 00:13:50,900
"Your children admire you,
I'm sure,
238
00:13:50,800 --> 00:13:52,800
"as we all hope they do,
239
00:13:52,800 --> 00:13:54,900
"and maybe your wife
doesn't know,
240
00:13:54,900 --> 00:13:56,800
"but I know,
241
00:13:56,800 --> 00:13:59,400
"and my knowledge forces me
to call you on the fact...
242
00:13:59,400 --> 00:14:03,500
that you are a goddamn cocksucking liar
from the word go!"
243
00:14:05,400 --> 00:14:07,900
And then I would sit down
and finish my soup.
244
00:14:13,600 --> 00:14:15,700
You would not.
245
00:14:15,700 --> 00:14:20,300
Phil, have you or have you not ever heard
or seen me doing what we were just talking about?
246
00:14:20,100 --> 00:14:21,700
Yes.
247
00:14:21,700 --> 00:14:23,600
There.
Do you see?
248
00:14:23,600 --> 00:14:26,600
That's why there's hope, Bob,
because there's people like me who listen.
249
00:14:26,500 --> 00:14:29,900
-When was this?
-What do you mean, "when"?
250
00:14:29,800 --> 00:14:32,900
Are you doubting a man that sits reading
Penthouse to expand his mind?
251
00:14:32,800 --> 00:14:36,100
Are you gonna
question that?
252
00:14:35,900 --> 00:14:39,300
It was a couple years ago. We were
having lunch with a purchasing agent.
253
00:14:39,300 --> 00:14:41,300
You see?
254
00:14:41,300 --> 00:14:44,100
-You actually said that?
-Word for word.
255
00:14:44,000 --> 00:14:47,300
It was not word for word.
256
00:14:47,200 --> 00:14:49,200
In principle, Phil.
257
00:14:49,300 --> 00:14:52,100
I'm speaking to the boy
in principle because, after all,
258
00:14:51,900 --> 00:14:54,900
he's a bright young man and he understands
the meaning of a concept.
259
00:14:54,900 --> 00:14:57,100
So what happened?
260
00:14:57,100 --> 00:14:59,000
Well, what do you think
happened?
261
00:14:59,000 --> 00:15:01,400
What would you expect
to have happened?
262
00:15:01,400 --> 00:15:03,700
Well, the guy got angry.
263
00:15:03,700 --> 00:15:05,600
The guy got furious.
264
00:15:05,700 --> 00:15:09,900
He just sat there through the rest of the meal,
fuming, not saying a word.
265
00:15:09,800 --> 00:15:12,800
D-Did you lose
the account?
266
00:15:12,800 --> 00:15:16,200
Of course we lost
the account.
267
00:15:16,100 --> 00:15:18,700
You can't speak to a man like that
and expect to keep the account.
268
00:15:18,600 --> 00:15:20,800
And if you do,
269
00:15:20,800 --> 00:15:25,600
if you say that to a man
and he puts down his fork...
270
00:15:25,400 --> 00:15:27,400
and he says, "Bob,
271
00:15:29,100 --> 00:15:31,500
"you are absolutely right.
272
00:15:31,500 --> 00:15:36,100
"I have been faking like I know what I'm
talking about from the moment I sat down,
273
00:15:35,900 --> 00:15:37,900
"and I'm sorry.
274
00:15:37,800 --> 00:15:41,400
"Not to you, because I don't owe you
anything, but to myself.
275
00:15:41,300 --> 00:15:44,600
"Because I want to be the best
human being I can possibly be,
276
00:15:44,600 --> 00:15:49,000
and I want to be honest
above all else."
277
00:15:48,900 --> 00:15:51,100
Then you forget about the account,
about everything.
278
00:15:51,100 --> 00:15:53,500
You shave your head,
put on a saffron robe,
279
00:15:53,500 --> 00:15:55,700
you sell pictures of this guy
at the airport,
280
00:15:55,600 --> 00:15:59,300
because he has no fear
and he's just proved it.
281
00:15:59,300 --> 00:16:02,400
He deserves
to be worshipped.
282
00:16:08,200 --> 00:16:10,200
Wow.
283
00:16:10,100 --> 00:16:13,900
"Wow" is right, Bob.
"Wow" sums it up quite nicely.
284
00:16:13,900 --> 00:16:16,000
I mean, I can't believe
you actually said that.
285
00:16:15,900 --> 00:16:17,000
I mean, I can't believe
you actually said that.
286
00:16:17,000 --> 00:16:19,400
-Do yourself a favor, Bob.
-What's that?
287
00:16:19,400 --> 00:16:22,000
-Don't ever become one of those people.
-No, I wouldn't.
288
00:16:22,000 --> 00:16:25,200
I don't want to have to confront you
one day like I did that other guy,
289
00:16:25,200 --> 00:16:28,800
but I will, for your own good,
because I like you.
290
00:16:28,700 --> 00:16:31,500
Sure.
291
00:16:35,400 --> 00:16:38,000
-You all right, Bob?
-Yeah. I just need to use the restroom.
292
00:16:37,900 --> 00:16:41,200
-Want me to fix you something while you're
on the throne? -No. I just need to go.
293
00:16:52,900 --> 00:16:55,800
-Who wound you up?
-Nobody wound me up.
294
00:16:55,800 --> 00:17:00,400
I'm just excited, that's all.
We're gonna do some business tonight, Phil.
295
00:17:00,300 --> 00:17:04,000
There's business in the air.
Do you smell it?
296
00:17:03,900 --> 00:17:06,500
It's the kind of air that makes
account ledgers grow.
297
00:17:06,500 --> 00:17:09,400
There's only one account ledger
that matters to us tonight.
298
00:17:09,400 --> 00:17:11,900
We're gonna get that one too.
You watch.
299
00:17:11,900 --> 00:17:14,300
Fuller's gonna come
walking through that door.
300
00:17:14,300 --> 00:17:16,400
He's gonna take
one look around.
301
00:17:16,400 --> 00:17:18,700
He will be
so overwhelmed...
302
00:17:18,700 --> 00:17:23,500
with the fact that he's
on the 16th floor overlooking...
303
00:17:23,300 --> 00:17:26,900
all of Wichita like some ancient king
surveying his fiefdom,
304
00:17:26,800 --> 00:17:30,800
Larry predicts, that he will say,
"You talk to me about moxie?
305
00:17:30,700 --> 00:17:34,100
"Anybody with
the aesthetic wherewithal...
306
00:17:33,900 --> 00:17:36,800
"to pick this, of all places,
for a hospitality suite...
307
00:17:36,700 --> 00:17:40,900
"must certainly have the right line of
industrial lubricants for my plant in Gary.
308
00:17:40,800 --> 00:17:45,400
"What would it take to get you guys
to sell me everything you could make?
309
00:17:45,300 --> 00:17:48,000
"How much can I pay you
personally,
310
00:17:47,900 --> 00:17:50,800
as a bribe?"
311
00:17:50,800 --> 00:17:54,700
-He's gonna say all that, is he?
-Word for word.
312
00:17:54,700 --> 00:17:58,600
You know what I'm gonna say to him?
"Mr. Fuller, you are absolutely right.
313
00:17:58,500 --> 00:18:02,500
"We do have the right line of industrial
lubricants for your application,
314
00:18:02,400 --> 00:18:05,100
"and I personally would be proud
to handle the account myself.
315
00:18:05,100 --> 00:18:08,500
"But there is one thing
I ask of you... as a favor,
316
00:18:08,500 --> 00:18:10,900
to help us
get better acquainted."
317
00:18:10,900 --> 00:18:14,200
-What's that?
-That you take me as your concubine.
318
00:18:14,100 --> 00:18:17,000
Or Phil, if you think
he's better looking.
319
00:18:17,000 --> 00:18:18,900
You really think
he's gonna go for us?
320
00:18:18,900 --> 00:18:21,000
-He has to, Phil.
-What if he doesn't?
321
00:18:21,000 --> 00:18:22,900
-If he doesn't go for us?
-Yeah.
322
00:18:23,000 --> 00:18:27,600
What we do is we get up tomorrow morning,
pack our bags, catch the breakfast flight home,
323
00:18:27,500 --> 00:18:30,200
wander into the office
around half past 2:00,
324
00:18:30,100 --> 00:18:32,900
and then we hang ourselves
in the bathroom by our ties.
325
00:18:32,900 --> 00:18:35,600
You... Do you know
what he looks like?
326
00:18:35,600 --> 00:18:38,100
-No. You?
-I haven't the foggiest.
327
00:18:38,000 --> 00:18:40,300
-What about Bob?
-Bob.
328
00:18:40,300 --> 00:18:42,600
-How's Bob gonna know what he looks like?
-Oh, yeah.
329
00:18:42,600 --> 00:18:45,400
It doesn't matter. That's one of
the great things about conventions.
330
00:18:45,300 --> 00:18:47,800
All God's "chillen" wear name tags,
especially a guy like this.
331
00:18:47,700 --> 00:18:51,800
He probably had one especially made in neon.
"Dick Fuller, President.
332
00:18:51,700 --> 00:18:53,900
Nickname:
El Kahuna Grande."
333
00:18:53,900 --> 00:18:57,800
I'm only hoping
he's wearing a ring I can kiss.
334
00:19:00,500 --> 00:19:04,300
-Phil, what is that?
-It's a coat rack.
335
00:19:04,200 --> 00:19:07,700
-I know it's a coat rack! What's it doing in here?
-It's for coats.
336
00:19:07,600 --> 00:19:10,800
Who the hell's gonna bring a coat?
We're all in the same damn hotel.
337
00:19:10,700 --> 00:19:13,400
Get it out of here. There's little
enough room in here as it is.
338
00:19:13,300 --> 00:19:15,300
I wanted to be prepared.
339
00:19:15,200 --> 00:19:19,500
If I don't have a coat rack, you're gonna
say, "Phil, where's the coat rack?"
340
00:19:19,400 --> 00:19:22,700
Now we know where it is.
It's out in the hall.
341
00:19:25,000 --> 00:19:27,000
Is he all right
in there?
342
00:19:26,900 --> 00:19:31,000
-I don't think he's feeling very well.
-Really? How come?
343
00:19:31,000 --> 00:19:33,700
Maybe it's nerves.
344
00:19:33,600 --> 00:19:36,400
-Or maybe he just couldn't take the likes of you.
-What?
345
00:19:36,400 --> 00:19:39,800
Especially when you come at him
with both barrels like that.
346
00:19:39,800 --> 00:19:42,600
What, me? Nah.
I was just talkin' to him.
347
00:19:42,500 --> 00:19:45,500
-He's a good kid.
-'Course he's a good kid.
348
00:19:45,300 --> 00:19:47,300
I wouldn't waste my time
with him if he wasn't.
349
00:19:47,300 --> 00:19:50,800
The last thing I need to do is grease
another asshole for the lubricant industry.
350
00:19:55,900 --> 00:19:58,600
Besides, he reminds me
of you in a lot of ways.
351
00:19:58,600 --> 00:20:03,000
-He reminds you of yourself.
-But I take after you, so it all works out.
352
00:20:02,800 --> 00:20:05,800
I don't want any of these bozos
making long-distance calls.
353
00:20:05,800 --> 00:20:07,800
Well, take it
off the bill.
354
00:20:11,600 --> 00:20:15,300
Or who knows? Maybe he's just basking
in the experience.
355
00:20:15,300 --> 00:20:18,300
-Going to the bathroom?
-Yeah. Have you been in there yet?
356
00:20:18,200 --> 00:20:20,200
-No. Why?
-It's terrific, man.
357
00:20:20,300 --> 00:20:24,300
It's the only thing I like about this place.
They got a spotlight over the john.
358
00:20:24,200 --> 00:20:26,600
That and there's mirrors
on three sides,
359
00:20:26,600 --> 00:20:30,300
so you can actually watch yourself
wiping your own ass.
360
00:20:30,200 --> 00:20:32,200
Is that a major goal
of yours?
361
00:20:32,100 --> 00:20:35,100
It's something everybody should experience
at least once in their lifetime.
362
00:20:35,100 --> 00:20:38,100
Do you realize what the ancient
kings of Egypt would have given...
363
00:20:38,100 --> 00:20:41,000
if they'd been able to watch themselves
wiping their own asses?
364
00:20:40,900 --> 00:20:43,900
Plenty, but they couldn't because
the technology was unavailable.
365
00:20:43,800 --> 00:20:46,700
-They had mirrors.
-Oh, hand mirrors, Phil.
366
00:20:46,600 --> 00:20:48,600
Little bitty jobs.
367
00:20:48,500 --> 00:20:51,600
You try watching yourself
wiping your own ass with a hand mirror.
368
00:20:51,600 --> 00:20:53,700
You might...
You can't see anything.
369
00:20:53,700 --> 00:20:55,800
You might as well
be watching somebody else.
370
00:20:55,700 --> 00:21:00,200
No, no, to do it right you need
the full-fledged wall-to-wall mirrors.
371
00:21:00,100 --> 00:21:02,300
Then you get
the total picture.
372
00:21:02,300 --> 00:21:05,200
Reminds you you're not much different
than anybody else when it comes down to it.
373
00:21:05,100 --> 00:21:08,600
-Gives you a sense of humility.
-Whatever you say.
374
00:21:10,800 --> 00:21:13,100
Oh!
The door is jammed.
375
00:21:13,100 --> 00:21:16,200
-I put a call in.
-Oh, Christ.
376
00:21:18,500 --> 00:21:22,000
Hey, you feelin'
any better, Bob?
377
00:21:26,700 --> 00:21:29,600
Yeah, just, uh,
Just a little queasy is all.
378
00:21:29,600 --> 00:21:32,300
-Did Phil have you working on the floor all day?
-Some of it.
379
00:21:33,800 --> 00:21:37,100
-Workin' the booth?
-Uh, yeah.
380
00:21:37,100 --> 00:21:39,600
No wonder. You should've told him
to go fuck himself.
381
00:21:39,600 --> 00:21:41,500
I hate workin'
the booth.
382
00:21:41,500 --> 00:21:45,600
-I thought it was kind of interesting.
-There's no closet in here.
383
00:21:45,500 --> 00:21:47,800
That's why I got
the coat rack.
384
00:21:47,700 --> 00:21:51,200
Anything's interesting
for a while, Bob.
385
00:21:51,200 --> 00:21:53,500
Dental surgery is interesting
for a while,
386
00:21:53,500 --> 00:21:57,200
but some things
get old in a hurry.
387
00:21:57,000 --> 00:22:00,700
-It's somethin' that has to be done.
-Ah. Well.
388
00:22:02,400 --> 00:22:05,500
There you are, Bob.
Words handed down from on high.
389
00:22:05,500 --> 00:22:09,200
"It's something
that has to be done."
390
00:22:09,100 --> 00:22:11,300
Larry, let me bum
a cigarette off you.
391
00:22:11,300 --> 00:22:13,500
You could ordinarily,
but not anymore.
392
00:22:13,500 --> 00:22:15,700
-I gave it up.
-You did not.
393
00:22:15,700 --> 00:22:17,600
-I swear to God.
-When?
394
00:22:17,700 --> 00:22:20,500
Couple of months ago. And you would, too,
if you knew what was good for you.
395
00:22:20,400 --> 00:22:23,200
Fuck you, Larry.
You're not my wife.
396
00:22:23,100 --> 00:22:26,100
You're right, Phil.
I'm not your wife.
397
00:22:26,000 --> 00:22:28,500
And it's good of you
to point that out...
398
00:22:28,400 --> 00:22:32,100
because, as close as we are,
I sometimes forget.
399
00:22:32,000 --> 00:22:34,600
Bob's got more sense
than the two of us put together.
400
00:22:34,500 --> 00:22:37,800
-You've never smoked a cigarette
in your life, have you? -No, I haven't.
401
00:22:37,800 --> 00:22:41,700
-I bet you don't drink either.
-An occasional beer now and then.
402
00:22:41,600 --> 00:22:43,800
-Yeah, but nothin' hard.
-No.
403
00:22:43,800 --> 00:22:47,400
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I'm willing
to bet... I'd even lay money...
404
00:22:47,400 --> 00:22:51,000
that never in your life have you walked
into a strip joint, walked up on the stage,
405
00:22:50,800 --> 00:22:55,200
grabbed the dancer and fucked her brains out
in front of everybody.
406
00:22:56,100 --> 00:22:59,600
-I never what?
-Jesus Christ, Larry.
407
00:22:59,500 --> 00:23:01,400
Just answer the question,
yes or no.
408
00:23:01,300 --> 00:23:02,400
Just answer the question,
yes or no.
409
00:23:02,300 --> 00:23:05,800
No. I... I've never even been near
a place like that.
410
00:23:05,800 --> 00:23:08,300
See, that's what I'm saying.
You oughta apply for sainthood.
411
00:23:08,300 --> 00:23:11,400
Competition's not as stiff as it used to be.
You got a good chance of gettin' in.
412
00:23:11,400 --> 00:23:14,000
-You Catholic? Episcopalian?
-No.
413
00:23:14,000 --> 00:23:16,400
-Well, what then?
-Uh, Baptist.
414
00:23:17,500 --> 00:23:19,900
Well, that is a problem.
415
00:23:19,900 --> 00:23:23,200
They must have something for people who go
through their lives without doing anything.
416
00:23:23,200 --> 00:23:27,100
-Not as far as I know.
-Damn it. Then it's time to change religions.
417
00:23:27,000 --> 00:23:29,600
Go someplace you're appreciated,
where there's a chance to move up.
418
00:23:29,500 --> 00:23:32,100
-You let me know if it happens.
-You'll be the first.
419
00:23:32,100 --> 00:23:36,300
Remember it was my idea. I get dibs
on the concessions... little plastic statues.
420
00:23:36,200 --> 00:23:39,800
-Where are you going?
-I'm gonna run down to the bar. I'll be right back.
421
00:23:40,900 --> 00:23:43,100
I'll go with you.
422
00:23:43,100 --> 00:23:45,500
Uh, no, no.
You better stay here.
423
00:23:45,500 --> 00:23:50,200
I have to have somebody keep their eye on Larry,
make sure he doesn't sublet the joint.
424
00:23:50,100 --> 00:23:53,800
When you're there, stop on 15, see what it's like
with people who know what they're doing.
425
00:23:55,000 --> 00:23:57,300
That is, if you can live
with the shame.
426
00:23:57,200 --> 00:24:00,000
And bring me back
some shrimp!
427
00:24:01,400 --> 00:24:04,100
What a nut.
428
00:24:04,100 --> 00:24:06,300
-Him or you?
-Him.
429
00:24:06,300 --> 00:24:08,200
The guy cracks me up.
430
00:24:08,200 --> 00:24:10,800
He's not the one I would
call a nut around here.
431
00:24:10,800 --> 00:24:14,000
That's just because you don't know him.
You want a carrot stick?
432
00:24:14,000 --> 00:24:17,400
-How long have you and he worked together?
-Depends on what you mean.
433
00:24:17,300 --> 00:24:19,700
-Do you want a carrot stick?
-No, thanks.
434
00:24:19,700 --> 00:24:22,900
Well, in geologic time,
we just met.
435
00:24:22,800 --> 00:24:25,700
However, in dog years,
we go way back.
436
00:24:25,700 --> 00:24:27,800
How 'bout human years?
437
00:24:30,800 --> 00:24:33,600
-Human years?
-Yeah.
438
00:24:33,600 --> 00:24:36,300
We've known each other a while.
Why do you ask?
439
00:24:36,200 --> 00:24:40,500
-He just strikes me as an interesting guy.
-That's one hell of a guy.
440
00:24:40,400 --> 00:24:43,200
If you're looking for somebody to admire,
pick Phil,
441
00:24:43,200 --> 00:24:45,100
not that asshole
Jim Young.
442
00:24:45,100 --> 00:24:47,600
How long has he been divorced?
443
00:24:49,900 --> 00:24:54,300
I don't think he is officially, but don't
quote me 'cause I don't really know.
444
00:24:54,100 --> 00:24:57,300
I think it's a shame
he has to get divorced.
445
00:24:57,200 --> 00:24:59,600
Well, he doesn't
have to, Bob.
446
00:24:59,600 --> 00:25:02,700
I mean, he's making a choice
to gain something.
447
00:25:02,600 --> 00:25:05,500
-Like what?
-His freedom, I guess.
448
00:25:05,500 --> 00:25:08,700
Still, it seems like
an awful lot to give up.
449
00:25:08,700 --> 00:25:12,600
Sometimes, Bob, you gotta chew your leg off
to get out of life's traps.
450
00:25:12,400 --> 00:25:15,200
I guess.
451
00:25:23,700 --> 00:25:26,100
Phil's gone through a lot of changes
in the last couple of years,
452
00:25:26,100 --> 00:25:28,000
and I don't just mean
the divorce.
453
00:25:28,000 --> 00:25:30,100
Really? How so?
454
00:25:30,100 --> 00:25:33,700
Well, he used to be a...
455
00:25:33,600 --> 00:25:35,800
I don't know.
456
00:25:35,800 --> 00:25:38,700
One day he'd be ridin' the clouds,
the world was a beautiful place,
457
00:25:38,700 --> 00:25:41,100
and he was just happy
to be in it,
458
00:25:41,100 --> 00:25:45,200
and the next day, you wouldn't even know
you were talkin' to the same person.
459
00:25:45,100 --> 00:25:48,100
It was like somebody
let the air out of him.
460
00:25:48,100 --> 00:25:51,900
You got the impression that at any moment
he could pull out a gun and shoot himself.
461
00:25:51,800 --> 00:25:54,400
And even then,
he was real personable.
462
00:25:54,400 --> 00:25:56,300
He just...
463
00:25:56,300 --> 00:26:00,800
I got the feeling that something
inside of him had kind of... collapsed.
464
00:26:00,700 --> 00:26:04,100
-What can I get you?
-Change for the cigarette machine.
465
00:26:08,500 --> 00:26:11,400
Crown Royal on the house.
Poured one too many.
466
00:26:11,300 --> 00:26:14,800
-No, thanks.
-It's all right, really.
467
00:26:14,700 --> 00:26:18,000
No, no, thank you.
Just the change. Thanks.
468
00:26:25,600 --> 00:26:29,300
Hmm. Things you don't know
about a person.
469
00:26:29,200 --> 00:26:32,300
That's why God gave us eyes
and ears, to find out,
470
00:26:32,200 --> 00:26:35,500
except for some things
that are none of our goddamn business.
471
00:26:36,400 --> 00:26:38,400
Sure.
472
00:26:38,300 --> 00:26:40,900
Ask me whatever you want
about Phil.
473
00:26:40,800 --> 00:26:44,000
I'll be glad to tell you,
if I think you're being sincere.
474
00:26:44,000 --> 00:26:45,900
But don't ask him.
475
00:26:45,900 --> 00:26:48,600
He's been through a lot.
He doesn't need to be pressed.
476
00:26:59,800 --> 00:27:03,900
-How long have you been married, Bob?
-Six months.
477
00:27:03,900 --> 00:27:07,100
-You love your wife?
-Do I love my wife?
478
00:27:07,000 --> 00:27:08,900
Why wouldn't I?
479
00:27:08,900 --> 00:27:13,100
Well, people get married
for a lot of different reasons.
480
00:27:13,100 --> 00:27:15,600
You seem like
a real principled guy to me.
481
00:27:15,500 --> 00:27:17,800
So?
482
00:27:17,800 --> 00:27:21,100
Well, I've known people.
I'm not saying you're one of them.
483
00:27:21,000 --> 00:27:23,900
It's just I've known them
who were real principled,
484
00:27:23,900 --> 00:27:27,400
and then they met somebody else
who was real principled,
485
00:27:27,400 --> 00:27:29,400
and then the two of them
got married,
486
00:27:29,300 --> 00:27:31,300
only to find out one day...
487
00:27:31,200 --> 00:27:33,700
it was their principles
that got married.
488
00:27:33,600 --> 00:27:36,800
The two of them
Just kind of came along for the ride.
489
00:27:38,000 --> 00:27:39,900
Oh.
490
00:27:39,900 --> 00:27:43,500
Love has a lot of counterfeits,
Bob, not to get too deep.
491
00:27:43,500 --> 00:27:45,400
Sure.
492
00:27:50,100 --> 00:27:55,200
Hey, speak of the devil,
where's my shrimp?
493
00:27:55,100 --> 00:27:57,800
Eat a carrot if you're
so goddamned hungry.
494
00:27:57,800 --> 00:28:00,400
Have a cheese ball.
495
00:28:00,400 --> 00:28:02,800
I don't want any cheese ball.
I want some shrimp.
496
00:28:02,700 --> 00:28:05,100
Then call room service
and get some.
497
00:28:05,100 --> 00:28:07,900
I would, but I don't want to embarrass you...
in front of the boy.
498
00:28:07,900 --> 00:28:10,300
Believe me, Larry,
as long as I've known you,
499
00:28:10,200 --> 00:28:14,200
nothing you could possibly say or do
could ever embarrass me in the least.
500
00:28:14,200 --> 00:28:16,900
You see what I have to put up with?
Twelve years now.
501
00:28:16,800 --> 00:28:18,800
But one day, no more.
I'm comin'to work with an Uzi!
502
00:28:18,800 --> 00:28:21,500
You're gonna read about us
in the newspapers the next day.
503
00:28:21,500 --> 00:28:26,100
-You sure I can't fix you something, Bob?
-Maybe just a cola.
504
00:28:26,000 --> 00:28:28,700
-Give me an ashtray.
-All righty.
505
00:28:28,600 --> 00:28:33,900
How 'bout you, Phil? What'll you have,
a Black Russian, martini with a twist?
506
00:28:33,800 --> 00:28:36,900
-I'll have a Seven-Up.
-A Seven-Up?
507
00:28:36,900 --> 00:28:39,100
Seven-Up
with a twist of lime.
508
00:28:39,100 --> 00:28:41,100
You feelin' all right
there, Phil?
509
00:28:41,100 --> 00:28:44,400
-I quit drinking.
-You did? When?
510
00:28:44,400 --> 00:28:47,000
Recently.
511
00:28:47,000 --> 00:28:50,300
Well, I'll be
a son of a bitch.
512
00:28:50,200 --> 00:28:53,200
I don't smoke, you don't drink, and Bob
wouldn't think of lusting after a woman.
513
00:28:53,100 --> 00:28:56,600
Between the three of us,
we're practically Jesus.
514
00:28:57,900 --> 00:29:00,500
Which reminds me,
who's gonna bar tend tonight?
515
00:29:00,500 --> 00:29:02,600
-I figured Bob would.
-Me?
516
00:29:02,600 --> 00:29:06,700
-Yeah. You mind?
-Like I said, I'm not accustomed to drinking hard liquor.
517
00:29:06,600 --> 00:29:09,500
Nobody's asking you
to drink it, Bob.
518
00:29:09,500 --> 00:29:12,100
-We're asking you to serve it.
-I won't know what I'm doing.
519
00:29:12,000 --> 00:29:15,500
It doesn't matter. You pour stuff
in a glass. Now you know bartending.
520
00:29:15,500 --> 00:29:18,200
What about the formulas?
521
00:29:19,600 --> 00:29:22,200
Formulas?
They're called recipes.
522
00:29:22,100 --> 00:29:24,400
We'll send out for a book.
That's all.
523
00:29:24,400 --> 00:29:26,900
What if somebody
wants something exotic?
524
00:29:26,800 --> 00:29:31,300
The only reason people order exotic drinks
is to show how sophisticated they are.
525
00:29:31,200 --> 00:29:34,500
If they have to tell you how to mix it,
it's all the better. It makes them feel like experts.
526
00:29:34,400 --> 00:29:37,100
Plus Larry and I are gonna
have our hands full.
527
00:29:37,100 --> 00:29:39,400
The brains of the company
will try.
528
00:29:39,400 --> 00:29:42,700
That's all we ask for, Bob,
is that you try.
529
00:29:42,600 --> 00:29:45,500
Gentlemen, here's to the profound,
religious experience...
530
00:29:45,400 --> 00:29:48,200
that comes
from doing a job well...
531
00:29:48,200 --> 00:29:50,700
-and being grossly underpaid.
-Happy days.
532
00:29:50,600 --> 00:29:53,000
-Happy Jesus.
-Happy...
533
00:29:53,000 --> 00:29:54,900
Amen.
534
00:29:58,300 --> 00:30:01,000
-What time is this thing
supposed to start tonight? -7:00.
535
00:30:00,900 --> 00:30:02,900
You hungry?
536
00:30:02,900 --> 00:30:06,600
-I could probably eat, I guess.
-What do you feel like?
537
00:30:06,600 --> 00:30:08,200
Maybe we oughta go
on downstairs.
538
00:30:08,200 --> 00:30:10,200
Yeah, that's exactly
what we'll do.
539
00:30:10,200 --> 00:30:12,800
We'll go downstairs,
fill our bellies full of hotel food.
540
00:30:12,800 --> 00:30:15,400
We'll "oogle" the waitresses
a little... or not.
541
00:30:15,400 --> 00:30:19,400
And then we'll come back up here
and we'll show Bob the ropes.
542
00:30:19,300 --> 00:30:23,800
We'll teach him what it's like
to do business.
543
00:30:23,700 --> 00:30:26,900
-I'm looking forward to it.
-You think you're ready for the big time, Bob?
544
00:30:26,900 --> 00:30:29,400
I guess there's only
one way to find out,
545
00:30:29,300 --> 00:30:32,100
and that's to throw me in the water,
see if I can swim.
546
00:30:32,100 --> 00:30:37,300
You're missing the point. We're about to
throw you off a cliff and see if you can fly.
547
00:30:37,200 --> 00:30:40,100
-You got a tag on your pants.
-I just bought it.
548
00:30:40,000 --> 00:30:44,100
-Take the little strings off.
-Jesus Christ. You got any scissors?
549
00:31:04,000 --> 00:31:06,300
The brains of the company
will try.
550
00:31:06,300 --> 00:31:10,400
You are saved!
You are saved!
551
00:31:18,800 --> 00:31:21,600
There you go!
552
00:31:21,600 --> 00:31:25,100
We save with Jesus!
Drinks for everyone.
553
00:31:24,900 --> 00:31:27,200
Line 'em up. Line 'em up,
boys and girls.
554
00:31:27,200 --> 00:31:29,100
You need a light?
555
00:31:35,600 --> 00:31:38,600
-So...
-Yeah, you want a gin fixer.
556
00:31:38,600 --> 00:31:41,300
Did you say gin buck
or gin fix?
557
00:31:44,400 --> 00:31:47,300
It's...
558
00:31:47,300 --> 00:31:49,200
What did you want?
559
00:31:49,200 --> 00:31:52,400
Uh... I'll give you this,
some of this.
560
00:32:18,800 --> 00:32:20,700
Phil?
561
00:32:20,800 --> 00:32:23,800
Phil, Phil, Phil!
Do you know what time it is?
562
00:32:23,700 --> 00:32:26,000
-I'm sure you're gonna tell me.
-It's 9:30!
563
00:32:26,000 --> 00:32:28,900
-So what?
-We started at 7:00. He's not coming!
564
00:32:28,900 --> 00:32:32,500
-He said he'd be here.
-Well, he's kidding, because he's not here.
565
00:32:32,500 --> 00:32:35,900
-What do you want me to do?
-Act a little concerned.
566
00:32:35,800 --> 00:32:40,700
-I'm concerned.
-Really? Because you hide it really well.
567
00:32:40,600 --> 00:32:44,300
Well...
Just... have faith,
568
00:32:44,200 --> 00:32:46,200
would ya?
569
00:32:46,200 --> 00:32:49,000
Just once.
570
00:32:49,000 --> 00:32:51,200
Have fa... Ha...
571
00:32:53,300 --> 00:32:55,400
Have faith?
Have faith.
572
00:33:25,700 --> 00:33:29,000
Hey, thanks a lot,
buddy.
573
00:33:35,900 --> 00:33:39,000
This is the finest champagne.
574
00:34:03,700 --> 00:34:05,600
That son of a bitch...
575
00:34:05,500 --> 00:34:07,000
That son of a bitch...
576
00:34:06,900 --> 00:34:10,100
talked to me about basketball
for nearly two hours.
577
00:34:10,100 --> 00:34:12,300
All he did was exhibit...
578
00:34:12,300 --> 00:34:16,000
that he doesn't know
the first thing about the game.
579
00:34:15,900 --> 00:34:18,600
What? You think you can get me
a smaller glass?
580
00:34:18,500 --> 00:34:22,000
-How 'bout a little thimble or somethin'?
-They're all dirty.
581
00:34:23,300 --> 00:34:25,300
Give me that bottle.
582
00:34:25,300 --> 00:34:28,300
That's what I love
about these things...
583
00:34:28,300 --> 00:34:30,200
it kills me
about these things...
584
00:34:30,200 --> 00:34:34,500
is that you get a guy away
from his wife for a couple days.
585
00:34:34,400 --> 00:34:36,600
You pour a couple
drinks into him,
586
00:34:36,600 --> 00:34:41,600
he, all of a sudden, becomes
the world's foremost expert on sports.
587
00:34:41,500 --> 00:34:45,700
That's why God
created wives, Bob.
588
00:34:45,600 --> 00:34:49,700
So that they could show men
when they're bein' assholes.
589
00:34:49,600 --> 00:34:52,500
You get a guy away
from his wife...
590
00:34:52,500 --> 00:34:55,400
for any length of time,
591
00:34:55,400 --> 00:34:59,100
and he hasn't the first idea
how to behave.
592
00:34:59,000 --> 00:35:01,300
Take it from me.
593
00:35:01,200 --> 00:35:04,100
The Bible said God created Eve
as a helpmate.
594
00:35:05,600 --> 00:35:09,400
-As a what?
-A helper...
595
00:35:09,300 --> 00:35:11,500
suitable
to meet his needs.
596
00:35:11,400 --> 00:35:16,700
I don't know anything about that, Bob,
but what I do know is this:
597
00:35:16,500 --> 00:35:19,600
God created women
to be mirrors...
598
00:35:19,500 --> 00:35:23,300
so a man could see
what an ass he is.
599
00:35:23,300 --> 00:35:26,300
I mean, you talk to me
about souls?
600
00:35:27,400 --> 00:35:31,900
A man does not know
what his soul looks like,
601
00:35:31,800 --> 00:35:34,900
hasn't any idea
what his soul looks like...
602
00:35:34,800 --> 00:35:39,800
until he gazes into the eyes of the woman
that he's married to.
603
00:35:39,600 --> 00:35:43,600
And then, if he's any kind
of decent human being,
604
00:35:43,400 --> 00:35:47,200
he spends the next
couple days throwin' up.
605
00:35:47,200 --> 00:35:50,500
Because no man...
no honest man...
606
00:35:50,400 --> 00:35:52,300
can stand that image.
607
00:35:52,300 --> 00:35:57,000
Go ahead, take your shoes off and
be comfortable. Everybody's gone.
608
00:35:56,900 --> 00:35:59,600
I thought you said you
didn't like being married.
609
00:36:00,900 --> 00:36:03,500
Well, I didn't,
610
00:36:03,500 --> 00:36:06,200
but that doesn't mean
I don't recommend it.
611
00:36:08,000 --> 00:36:12,000
There's a lot of things in this life, Bob,
that are good for you...
612
00:36:11,900 --> 00:36:13,800
that are not
necessarily pleasant.
613
00:36:13,800 --> 00:36:15,700
Like circumcision.
614
00:36:21,300 --> 00:36:24,800
Well, it's about time.
Where the hell have you been?
615
00:36:24,800 --> 00:36:27,100
What do you mean,
where the hell have I been?
616
00:36:27,100 --> 00:36:31,200
While you've been sittin' here, strokin' every
swingin' dick that walked through that door,
617
00:36:31,100 --> 00:36:35,100
I've been in search
of the Grand Kahuna!
618
00:36:35,000 --> 00:36:37,700
-The what?
-The savior, Bob.
619
00:36:37,700 --> 00:36:39,600
El presidente.
620
00:36:39,600 --> 00:36:43,100
The man who, with one small utterance,
one tiny ejaculation of sound,
621
00:36:43,100 --> 00:36:45,300
could make this company
big with child.
622
00:36:45,300 --> 00:36:47,700
Did you find him?
623
00:36:48,700 --> 00:36:51,700
Phil, use your intuition
here for a second.
624
00:36:51,600 --> 00:36:55,400
Use that God-given gift you have
for smelling out the truth of a situation.
625
00:36:55,400 --> 00:36:58,300
-Do I look as though I found him?
-No.
626
00:36:58,100 --> 00:37:00,100
Good.
You still have it.
627
00:37:00,100 --> 00:37:02,500
Who are you guys
talking about?
628
00:37:02,500 --> 00:37:07,000
We're talking about the Grand Kahuna, Bob.
The Great White Wha...
629
00:37:06,900 --> 00:37:09,100
-Did you ever read The Old Man and the Sea?
-No.
630
00:37:09,000 --> 00:37:11,000
Then forget about it.
631
00:37:10,900 --> 00:37:14,100
We're talking about a man
who represents, as an entity,
632
00:37:14,000 --> 00:37:18,300
the largest single account this company has
or probably ever would have seen.
633
00:37:18,200 --> 00:37:21,600
-Potential account.
-It's good of you to point that out.
634
00:37:21,500 --> 00:37:23,800
Potential.
What could have been.
635
00:37:23,800 --> 00:37:26,100
Because it was our job,
compadres,
636
00:37:26,100 --> 00:37:28,200
to turn that potentiality
into reality,
637
00:37:28,300 --> 00:37:32,500
to have it show up in the coffers,
to court this gentleman,
638
00:37:32,400 --> 00:37:36,100
to promise him favors, if necessary,
to get him on our side.
639
00:37:36,000 --> 00:37:40,000
But did we succeed in this regard or
did we fail? Let's see a show of hands.
640
00:37:40,000 --> 00:37:43,600
-We'll be all right.
-Yeah, of course we'll be all right.
641
00:37:43,400 --> 00:37:47,200
Once they drag our bodies from the river
and send our spirits to the moon.
642
00:37:47,100 --> 00:37:49,100
Then, sure.
It's the intermediate stuff.
643
00:37:49,100 --> 00:37:51,800
It's the actual process of being
skinned alive and set fire to.
644
00:37:51,800 --> 00:37:54,100
That's the difficult part.
The rest is duck soup.
645
00:37:55,100 --> 00:37:59,300
You had to go searching
for this guy?
646
00:37:59,100 --> 00:38:01,800
We had to, Bob.
We weren't supposed to.
647
00:38:01,800 --> 00:38:03,700
But yes, we had to.
648
00:38:03,600 --> 00:38:06,800
He was supposed to
have shown up here tonight.
649
00:38:06,800 --> 00:38:09,900
Someone was supposed to have
lured him up here for a drink.
650
00:38:09,900 --> 00:38:12,800
What are you lookin'
at me for?
651
00:38:12,700 --> 00:38:14,700
I done my job.
652
00:38:16,700 --> 00:38:20,200
-You phoned him?
-You're goddamned right I phoned him.
653
00:38:20,100 --> 00:38:22,200
And you spoke to him
direct?
654
00:38:25,100 --> 00:38:27,700
I talked to his secretary.
655
00:38:27,600 --> 00:38:31,300
He was on
a long-distance call.
656
00:38:34,500 --> 00:38:37,300
-She assured me that he'd be here.
-She assured you?
657
00:38:37,300 --> 00:38:39,200
Guess what.
She was joking!
658
00:38:39,200 --> 00:38:42,200
She probably had her secretary friends gathered
around the speaker phone, saying,
659
00:38:42,200 --> 00:38:44,600
"Watch this."
660
00:38:44,500 --> 00:38:47,600
-I bet she does stand-up on the side.
-Something probably happened.
661
00:38:49,400 --> 00:38:52,600
I think it's rather obvious
that something "happened."
662
00:38:52,600 --> 00:38:56,900
-Maybe he just pulled up sick at the last minute.
-Oh, no, he's here.
663
00:38:56,800 --> 00:38:59,900
No, I've heard his name bandied about
all night long in the present tense.
664
00:38:59,900 --> 00:39:03,800
He's here, my friends.
He just isn't here!
665
00:39:03,800 --> 00:39:05,500
If you get
my subtle nuance.
666
00:39:05,500 --> 00:39:08,700
Well...
we just have to...
667
00:39:08,700 --> 00:39:10,800
figure out some other way,
is all.
668
00:39:12,200 --> 00:39:14,200
Phil, are you deaf?
669
00:39:14,200 --> 00:39:18,000
We lost the man.
He was invited, but he did not come.
670
00:39:18,000 --> 00:39:20,600
We're like the dinosaurs
when the climate changed.
671
00:39:20,600 --> 00:39:23,000
There is no longer any reason
for us to roam the Earth.
672
00:39:24,400 --> 00:39:27,600
Why can't you just
schedule an appointment...
673
00:39:27,500 --> 00:39:30,000
and go and see him?
674
00:39:30,000 --> 00:39:32,500
You don't schedule
an appointment with this guy.
675
00:39:32,400 --> 00:39:35,300
He's the president.
He refers you to his people.
676
00:39:35,100 --> 00:39:38,700
-Why not go see his people?
-Because they're all dildos, every single one of them.
677
00:39:38,700 --> 00:39:42,100
Sometimes you have to
go past the smaller minds.
678
00:39:42,100 --> 00:39:44,800
You have to cozy up to someone
a little higher on the ladder who says,
679
00:39:44,700 --> 00:39:47,300
"I would really like to try
some of this new product.
680
00:39:47,300 --> 00:39:50,300
Either buy some and try it
or get the fuck out because you're fired!"
681
00:39:50,300 --> 00:39:54,000
Gonna put another call
into his secretary in the morning.
682
00:39:55,200 --> 00:39:57,700
Phil, are you not hearing
a word I'm saying?
683
00:39:57,700 --> 00:40:02,600
I realize it's human nature to think we stand
another chance with this guy, but it's fantasy.
684
00:40:02,400 --> 00:40:05,900
We're gonna go back to Chicago tomorrow,
and Evans is gonna say,
685
00:40:05,700 --> 00:40:07,700
"Hey, Phil, Larry, Bob,
686
00:40:07,700 --> 00:40:09,800
"come into my office.
687
00:40:09,800 --> 00:40:12,400
"I have something
for you.
688
00:40:12,400 --> 00:40:15,000
Bend over."
689
00:40:16,400 --> 00:40:20,300
So what do you think, Bob?
Do you wanna do this for a living?
690
00:40:20,100 --> 00:40:24,200
-I don't know. I thought it was kind of interesting.
-Oh, yeah? How so?
691
00:40:24,100 --> 00:40:28,300
-You get to hear a lot of interesting stories.
-That you do.
692
00:40:28,200 --> 00:40:31,100
They're far outweighed by the horseshit
that flies across the room all night,
693
00:40:31,100 --> 00:40:33,200
but they're there
to listen for if you want.
694
00:40:33,200 --> 00:40:35,100
Are there always
this many people?
695
00:40:35,100 --> 00:40:37,600
It just looked like a lot of people
'cause the room's so damn small.
696
00:40:37,600 --> 00:40:41,600
-Larry.
-Sorry, the carrot stick's gone to my head.
697
00:40:42,800 --> 00:40:46,400
I met a guy who started
talking to me about dogs.
698
00:40:46,300 --> 00:40:48,200
What about dogs?
699
00:40:48,200 --> 00:40:51,200
Just that he's
always owned one.
700
00:40:51,100 --> 00:40:54,600
He told me that one way or the other,
he's owned a dog his entire life,
701
00:40:54,600 --> 00:40:57,300
most of them
German Shepherds.
702
00:40:57,300 --> 00:41:00,500
That's not that unusual.
A lot of people have dogs.
703
00:41:00,400 --> 00:41:04,800
Oh, I know, but that got us started
on all sorts of things.
704
00:41:04,600 --> 00:41:08,200
Turns out he had to have his last one
put to sleep 'cause it bit someone.
705
00:41:08,100 --> 00:41:11,200
So then he started telling me about
the one before that...
706
00:41:11,100 --> 00:41:13,300
and the one before that.
707
00:41:13,200 --> 00:41:18,200
And before we knew it, we traced
his entire life in this series of dogs.
708
00:41:18,100 --> 00:41:20,900
Mostly German Shepherds.
709
00:41:22,800 --> 00:41:25,500
I wish to hell
Murdoch was here.
710
00:41:25,500 --> 00:41:28,300
Who's Murdoch?
711
00:41:28,100 --> 00:41:30,300
Dale Murdoch.
712
00:41:30,200 --> 00:41:34,600
The best damn marketing rep
this company has ever seen.
713
00:41:34,900 --> 00:41:36,900
God, Jesus,
what a talent.
714
00:41:37,000 --> 00:41:40,300
-Successful?
-More than just successful.
715
00:41:40,100 --> 00:41:43,200
This guy,
he had the gift.
716
00:41:43,200 --> 00:41:46,500
You know how, like, when you're watching
athletes do what they're doing.
717
00:41:46,500 --> 00:41:51,000
They're remembering something they've always
known, instead of something they had to learn.
718
00:41:50,900 --> 00:41:53,400
That's what it was like with Murdoch,
except only with people.
719
00:41:53,300 --> 00:41:55,500
-Where is he now?
-Who, Murdoch?
720
00:41:55,500 --> 00:41:58,700
-Yeah.
-He's gone on to his great reward.
721
00:41:58,500 --> 00:42:01,000
Yeah, I heard he was down
in Florida somewhere.
722
00:42:01,000 --> 00:42:05,600
Last I heard, somebody had said that
he had a whole chain of Burger Kings.
723
00:42:05,500 --> 00:42:09,500
I wouldn't doubt it if it was the biggest
goddamn chain in the state.
724
00:42:09,400 --> 00:42:12,000
But the days of Murdoch
are behind us.
725
00:42:11,900 --> 00:42:14,100
Now it's the days
of Larry and Phil.
726
00:42:14,100 --> 00:42:16,000
Phil and Larry
and Bob,
727
00:42:16,000 --> 00:42:19,400
three guys who are about
to be royally fucked up the ass.
728
00:42:19,400 --> 00:42:21,300
We'll be all right.
729
00:42:22,600 --> 00:42:25,300
Oh, you think so, huh?
730
00:42:25,300 --> 00:42:27,900
-Sure.
-Well, I hope you're right, for our sake,
731
00:42:27,900 --> 00:42:31,800
because letting Mr. Fuller slip through
our fingers could be construed...
732
00:42:31,700 --> 00:42:33,600
as an act of incompetence.
733
00:42:33,600 --> 00:42:35,600
It makes us look
pretty damn bad.
734
00:42:35,700 --> 00:42:38,800
-Did you say Fuller?
-Yeah.
735
00:42:38,700 --> 00:42:42,700
-Dick Fuller?
-Yeah. Dick, Richard.
736
00:42:42,700 --> 00:42:45,500
-Why, you know him?
-That was the guy I was talking to.
737
00:42:46,500 --> 00:42:48,400
What are you...
What?
738
00:42:48,400 --> 00:42:52,300
-The guy with the dogs! That was Dick Fuller.
-Oh, get out of here.
739
00:42:52,200 --> 00:42:55,200
I'm serious.
Look, he even gave me his card.
740
00:42:55,100 --> 00:42:58,400
-Oh, you son of a bitch!
-Let me see it.
741
00:42:58,400 --> 00:43:01,500
-I thought you checked everybody's name tag.
-I did.
742
00:43:01,500 --> 00:43:05,100
Anybody that wasn't wearing a name tag,
I came right out and said, "What's your name?"
743
00:43:04,900 --> 00:43:07,000
-He wasn't wearing his name tag.
-What?
744
00:43:06,900 --> 00:43:09,500
He wasn't wearing his own.
I think it was someone else's.
745
00:43:09,500 --> 00:43:12,900
Why on earth would he be wearing
somebody else's name tag, Bob?
746
00:43:12,900 --> 00:43:16,100
Beats me. Looks like he had a couple
of drinks before he got here.
747
00:43:15,900 --> 00:43:18,900
Maybe he swapped it. I got the impression
he wanted to be left alone.
748
00:43:18,900 --> 00:43:21,800
-He was awful broken up about the dog.
-I do not fuckin' believe this.
749
00:43:21,800 --> 00:43:25,600
We had Dick Fuller right here within our grasp,
and we let him slip through our fingers!
750
00:43:25,500 --> 00:43:27,800
-Sorry.
-It's not your fault, Bob.
751
00:43:27,800 --> 00:43:30,100
We had him.
He was ours.
752
00:43:30,100 --> 00:43:33,500
Next time you ask people's names,
whether they're wearing badges or not.
753
00:43:33,500 --> 00:43:37,200
I'll give you a little piece of information.
There will be no next time.
754
00:43:37,100 --> 00:43:40,200
We had Dick Fuller
within our sphere of influence,
755
00:43:40,200 --> 00:43:43,200
and we let him walk out of here
without hearing from us...
756
00:43:43,200 --> 00:43:45,200
a word of what
we had to say.
757
00:43:45,100 --> 00:43:47,100
We'll be all right.
758
00:43:47,000 --> 00:43:49,200
What did you guys
talk about, Bob?
759
00:43:49,200 --> 00:43:52,300
Just... I don't know.
Stuff.
760
00:43:52,200 --> 00:43:55,300
Could you be more specific?
Sports, weather, what?
761
00:43:55,200 --> 00:43:58,000
Dogs mostly.
762
00:43:58,000 --> 00:44:01,200
That's it?
Nothing else?
763
00:44:01,100 --> 00:44:04,200
That and stuff about our families.
He asked about my wife.
764
00:44:04,200 --> 00:44:06,100
-Your wife?
-Yeah.
765
00:44:06,100 --> 00:44:10,100
-What did he want to know about your wife?
-Nothing. He just asked.
766
00:44:10,000 --> 00:44:14,500
Did you tell him he could have her,
in consideration for throwing business our way?
767
00:44:14,400 --> 00:44:15,900
Larry.
768
00:44:16,000 --> 00:44:18,800
Well, what?
What did you talk about?
769
00:44:23,200 --> 00:44:26,100
Just... I don't know.
Religion some.
770
00:44:26,100 --> 00:44:28,000
You talked
to the president...
771
00:44:28,000 --> 00:44:31,500
of one of the largest manufacturing firms
in the midwest about religion?
772
00:44:31,400 --> 00:44:34,000
Is that who he is?
I didn't know.
773
00:44:34,000 --> 00:44:36,500
Okay, wait, wait.
What did you say to him?
774
00:44:36,500 --> 00:44:39,700
What exactly did you tell him
about religion?
775
00:44:40,500 --> 00:44:41,900
We just talked.
776
00:44:42,000 --> 00:44:43,900
-You didn't contradict him, did you?
-No.
777
00:44:43,900 --> 00:44:47,100
Thank God. The first rule about
talking religion at a convention...
778
00:44:47,100 --> 00:44:49,600
is "Do not contradict
the client."
779
00:44:49,600 --> 00:44:51,700
I take that back.
That's the second rule.
780
00:44:51,700 --> 00:44:54,200
-The first rule is "Don't."
-Don't what?
781
00:44:54,200 --> 00:44:57,400
-Don't do it.
-Well, we seem to have survived.
782
00:44:57,300 --> 00:44:59,700
-Did you contradict him?
-No.
783
00:44:59,700 --> 00:45:02,300
Well, then that's why.
That's the reason you survived.
784
00:45:02,300 --> 00:45:05,200
I thought it was a nice chat.
785
00:45:05,200 --> 00:45:10,000
How did you end up talking about religion
with Dick Fuller in the first place?
786
00:45:09,900 --> 00:45:13,900
It just came up
with the stories of his dogs dying.
787
00:45:13,800 --> 00:45:17,100
-You told him his dogs were in heaven?
-No.
788
00:45:17,100 --> 00:45:20,200
-You told him his dogs were in hell?
-Of course not.
789
00:45:20,200 --> 00:45:24,500
Well, then what, Bob?
What exactly did you say to the man?
790
00:45:24,300 --> 00:45:26,300
We started talking.
791
00:45:26,200 --> 00:45:28,700
The thing about the dogs
was just a lead-in.
792
00:45:28,700 --> 00:45:32,500
I mean, it got us talking
about life and death.
793
00:45:33,800 --> 00:45:36,600
I-It was a lead-in, Bob?
794
00:45:36,600 --> 00:45:38,500
Sure.
795
00:45:39,900 --> 00:45:42,900
Which implies, does it not,
that you were...
796
00:45:42,900 --> 00:45:47,000
looking for the opportunity
to talk about life and death?
797
00:45:46,900 --> 00:45:49,300
Sure, l-I guess so.
Sure.
798
00:45:49,300 --> 00:45:53,800
No, don't say sure. It's not like "sure."
How am I supposed to know?
799
00:45:53,600 --> 00:45:57,400
I mean, most people don't go around
looking for opportunities...
800
00:45:57,400 --> 00:46:01,100
to strike up conversations with total
strangers about life and death...
801
00:46:00,900 --> 00:46:02,900
and religion
and things of that ilk.
802
00:46:02,800 --> 00:46:05,600
-Some people do.
-Some people, yeah.
803
00:46:05,600 --> 00:46:08,500
I guess there's some people,
and apparently you're one of them.
804
00:46:08,500 --> 00:46:11,300
But most people, if you ask
about life and death,
805
00:46:11,200 --> 00:46:13,800
they say, "Hey, life is good.
Death is bad. The end."
806
00:46:13,800 --> 00:46:18,800
-They don't go looking for opportunities.
-I guess I'm not most people.
807
00:46:18,700 --> 00:46:23,100
Bob, that's probably true.
I would say that's very safe to say.
808
00:46:23,000 --> 00:46:25,700
I think it's important
to let people know what you believe.
809
00:46:25,700 --> 00:46:27,600
Oh, Jesus Christ!
810
00:46:27,500 --> 00:46:30,500
If I had known that you were supposed
to get in touch with the guy,
811
00:46:30,400 --> 00:46:33,800
then I would have told you,
I would have alerted you somehow.
812
00:46:33,600 --> 00:46:36,300
It's not your fault, Bob.
813
00:46:36,300 --> 00:46:38,600
Phil!
814
00:46:38,600 --> 00:46:41,800
How was he to know?
He was just talkin' to the guy.
815
00:46:41,800 --> 00:46:45,200
Talking to the guy, yes.
But listening? I don't think so.
816
00:46:45,000 --> 00:46:48,100
At least not for the opportunities
to advance the interests of the company.
817
00:46:48,100 --> 00:46:51,200
Maybe if the conversation had stayed on
a more temporal plane,
818
00:46:51,200 --> 00:46:54,400
then maybe it might have worked itself
around to the subject...
819
00:46:54,300 --> 00:46:56,200
of where lubricants
might have been mentioned.
820
00:46:56,300 --> 00:46:58,200
-You don't know that.
-Oh, come on.
821
00:46:58,200 --> 00:47:00,300
The odds are a hell of a lot better,
but as it was,
822
00:47:00,200 --> 00:47:02,700
the conversation was not allowed
to have a natural course...
823
00:47:02,700 --> 00:47:03,900
because somebody was at the helm
directing it, right, Bob?
824
00:47:03,800 --> 00:47:06,100
because somebody was at the helm
directing it, right, Bob?
825
00:47:06,100 --> 00:47:09,600
-Sounds like the guy just wanted to be left alone.
-That is not the point.
826
00:47:09,600 --> 00:47:12,000
Phil's right. He practically
came out and said it.
827
00:47:12,000 --> 00:47:16,100
Well, guys, friends, compadres,
it was our task at hand...
828
00:47:16,000 --> 00:47:19,100
to overcome that desire of his
for a little while,
829
00:47:19,000 --> 00:47:21,400
to garner his interest,
830
00:47:21,400 --> 00:47:23,700
and I submit to you
he did not want to be left alone.
831
00:47:23,600 --> 00:47:25,600
If he had, he would have
stayed in his hotel room.
832
00:47:25,500 --> 00:47:29,000
He would not have gone cruising the hospitality
suites in search of conversation.
833
00:47:29,000 --> 00:47:32,700
I submit to you he did not wish to be
left alone, but only not to talk business.
834
00:47:32,500 --> 00:47:35,300
-In which case we're out of luck anyway.
-Now, Phil, come on.
835
00:47:35,300 --> 00:47:37,200
There's ways around that,
and you know it.
836
00:47:37,200 --> 00:47:39,700
Not to badger the man but to let him
know what we came here to tell him.
837
00:47:39,700 --> 00:47:42,100
-That's what I'm saying.
-I'm sorry.
838
00:47:42,100 --> 00:47:45,200
Does no good to be sorry.
It doesn't do us any good now.
839
00:47:45,200 --> 00:47:49,000
-What else can I do?
-There is nothing you can do now at this juncture!
840
00:47:48,900 --> 00:47:51,200
Nothing.
841
00:47:58,300 --> 00:48:02,400
-Did he happen to mention where he was staying?
-Somewhere in the hotel.
842
00:48:02,200 --> 00:48:05,100
-This hotel?
-Yes.
843
00:48:05,100 --> 00:48:07,800
What are you gonna do?
Bang on his door after midnight?
844
00:48:07,700 --> 00:48:09,700
I'm just asking.
Is there a crime in that?
845
00:48:09,600 --> 00:48:13,400
I'm thinking that maybe tomorrow morning
we could run into him...
846
00:48:13,400 --> 00:48:16,000
in the coffee shop
downstairs accidentally.
847
00:48:16,000 --> 00:48:18,300
-We don't know what he looks like.
-Bob does.
848
00:48:18,200 --> 00:48:20,900
I'd be willing
to do that.
849
00:48:20,900 --> 00:48:24,100
What's all this business
on the back of his card?
850
00:48:23,900 --> 00:48:28,000
-That's where he was going after he left here.
-What, what, what?
851
00:48:27,900 --> 00:48:30,700
Some kind of private party
at the hotel down the street.
852
00:48:30,500 --> 00:48:33,200
-What are we doing here? Let's go!
-We can't.
853
00:48:33,200 --> 00:48:35,300
-Why not?
-It's by invitation only.
854
00:48:35,300 --> 00:48:38,800
-So?
-I think he'd get mad if we all showed up.
855
00:48:38,800 --> 00:48:40,600
He made a big point
about how private it was.
856
00:48:40,600 --> 00:48:43,400
That's the least of our worries.
If he gets mad, we'll deal with it.
857
00:48:43,400 --> 00:48:45,200
Grab your coats.
858
00:48:45,100 --> 00:48:47,100
-Not so fast, Larry.
-What?
859
00:48:47,100 --> 00:48:51,600
I think Bob may be right.
We don't want to barge in on this guy.
860
00:48:51,500 --> 00:48:54,800
-Phil!
-Think about it.
861
00:48:54,800 --> 00:48:58,500
Do you really want to piss this guy off
by crashing some exclusive party,
862
00:48:58,500 --> 00:49:00,900
not to mention whoever else
might be there?
863
00:49:00,800 --> 00:49:04,600
You suggest we stand here while the account
of a lifetime slips through our fingers?
864
00:49:04,500 --> 00:49:06,600
No, no.
865
00:49:06,600 --> 00:49:08,500
Well, what then?
866
00:49:13,600 --> 00:49:15,500
I think we send Bob.
867
00:49:15,500 --> 00:49:17,600
What?
868
00:49:17,600 --> 00:49:21,500
Look, he gave you that thing
as an invitation, right?
869
00:49:21,500 --> 00:49:24,000
Yeah, he said
it would get me in.
870
00:49:24,000 --> 00:49:26,300
Phil, Phil, Phil!
Don't do this to me, man.
871
00:49:26,200 --> 00:49:28,400
What choice do we have?
872
00:49:28,400 --> 00:49:31,100
That is our only
legitimate way in there.
873
00:49:31,000 --> 00:49:34,100
Besides, he knows Bob.
874
00:49:33,900 --> 00:49:36,500
They talked.
Bob's got an in.
875
00:49:36,500 --> 00:49:40,100
You are putting our future
in the hands of a kid.
876
00:49:40,100 --> 00:49:42,900
Nah, it's gonna be all right.
Give me your card.
877
00:49:42,900 --> 00:49:45,700
-Oh, Jesus Christ.
-Give me your card.
878
00:49:45,600 --> 00:49:47,800
All right.
879
00:49:47,700 --> 00:49:51,900
Now, here's what I want you to do.
Sit down.
880
00:49:51,900 --> 00:49:55,300
-Listen to me.
-I'm listening.
881
00:49:55,200 --> 00:49:57,300
Here's what I
want you to do.
882
00:49:59,000 --> 00:50:02,900
I want you to go down the street and
see if you can find Mr. Fuller.
883
00:50:02,700 --> 00:50:05,400
If you're fortunate
and he is still there,
884
00:50:05,400 --> 00:50:07,800
I want you to give him
our business cards.
885
00:50:07,800 --> 00:50:10,400
Tell him that we
are very anxious...
886
00:50:10,400 --> 00:50:13,800
to meet with him as soon
as it's humanly possible.
887
00:50:13,700 --> 00:50:15,800
-You got that?
-As soon as humanly possible.
888
00:50:15,800 --> 00:50:19,700
Okay. Tell him we'll be around the hotel
all morning tomorrow.
889
00:50:19,500 --> 00:50:22,700
He can reach us here
or at the numbers on these cards.
890
00:50:22,700 --> 00:50:25,800
All right, here.
Ask him...
891
00:50:25,700 --> 00:50:29,200
Ask him to please get a hold
of either Larry or me...
892
00:50:29,200 --> 00:50:32,400
because we would like
to speak to him very briefly...
893
00:50:32,300 --> 00:50:34,200
about business.
894
00:50:34,300 --> 00:50:38,100
-Just business.
-Explain to him we know that he's very busy.
895
00:50:38,000 --> 00:50:42,800
It won't take up much time, but there are
a few things that we need to discuss.
896
00:50:42,700 --> 00:50:45,100
Now, do you have that,
Bob?
897
00:50:45,100 --> 00:50:48,500
-Yeah. I'll try.
-All you have to do... Listen to me.
898
00:50:48,400 --> 00:50:50,900
All you have to do is
give him the cards and leave.
899
00:50:50,900 --> 00:50:55,100
-What if he wants to talk?
-Well, then you talk as long as he wants.
900
00:50:55,000 --> 00:50:57,500
Forty days and forty nights,
if you have to, until he tires of it.
901
00:50:57,500 --> 00:51:01,400
-Then you come back here and
tell us what happened. -You'll wait up?
902
00:51:01,300 --> 00:51:04,100
Till the next fiscal quarter.
Beyond that, I can't make any guarantees.
903
00:51:05,200 --> 00:51:07,500
Don't worry about it.
You're gonna do fine.
904
00:51:07,500 --> 00:51:10,300
Yeah, you'll do fine, Bob. I'm sorry
for doubting you. Of course you'll do fine.
905
00:51:10,200 --> 00:51:13,100
If you follow those instructions to the letter,
you'll do great. You understand?
906
00:51:13,000 --> 00:51:16,500
-Yes.
-Okay, good. Now go. Time's a-wasting.
907
00:51:16,400 --> 00:51:18,500
-I'll see you guys later.
-Okay. And hurry.
908
00:51:18,400 --> 00:51:22,100
But not too fast, because you'll work up
a sweat and he won't want to come near you.
909
00:51:22,000 --> 00:51:24,000
Okay.
910
00:51:30,100 --> 00:51:32,400
Do I, uh...
911
00:51:32,400 --> 00:51:36,500
Do I strike you as a particularly
religious man, Phil?
912
00:51:38,100 --> 00:51:41,300
Not in the slightest.
913
00:51:41,300 --> 00:51:44,700
Then why am I seized
with a sudden, overwhelming desire...
914
00:51:44,700 --> 00:51:46,600
to pray?
915
00:52:27,600 --> 00:52:31,100
I should let it dry,
but I'm a little impatient.
916
00:52:41,000 --> 00:52:43,500
I wonder if he found him.
917
00:52:46,200 --> 00:52:47,400
He found him.
918
00:52:47,500 --> 00:52:49,600
What makes you so sure?
919
00:52:51,600 --> 00:52:54,200
If he hadn't have,
he would've been back by now.
920
00:52:54,200 --> 00:52:56,400
Not necessarily.
921
00:52:57,600 --> 00:53:00,900
-It'll be all right.
-Yeah.
922
00:53:05,500 --> 00:53:08,400
Phil, can I ask you something
seriously?
923
00:53:08,300 --> 00:53:10,300
Yeah.
924
00:53:10,200 --> 00:53:13,000
Are you on some kind of medication
I should know about?
925
00:53:18,400 --> 00:53:21,800
What makes you think
I'm taking medication?
926
00:53:21,700 --> 00:53:25,900
Because I've never seen you
this relaxed before.
927
00:53:25,900 --> 00:53:29,400
I almost get the impression
that you just frankly don't give a shit.
928
00:53:31,300 --> 00:53:33,300
I don't.
929
00:53:33,200 --> 00:53:36,400
No, I know that. We all don't give
a shit to a certain extent.
930
00:53:36,400 --> 00:53:39,700
What I'm saying is,
it's like you don't care.
931
00:53:41,500 --> 00:53:43,500
I'm tired, Larry.
932
00:53:43,400 --> 00:53:46,300
Well, I recognize that.
It's been a very long day.
933
00:53:46,300 --> 00:53:48,500
That's not what I mean.
934
00:53:55,400 --> 00:53:59,200
I get what you're driving at,
and I sympathize. I do.
935
00:53:59,100 --> 00:54:03,300
We all know you've been
going through a lot lately, Phil.
936
00:54:03,200 --> 00:54:06,200
For a long time I've been meaning to state
outright, if you need anything at all,
937
00:54:06,100 --> 00:54:08,500
you don't hesitate to call,
day or night.
938
00:54:08,500 --> 00:54:13,000
I would've said something sooner, but
I thought maybe it was understood.
939
00:54:13,000 --> 00:54:14,900
I assumed as much.
940
00:54:14,900 --> 00:54:18,400
Well, you were right, too,
and I hope you know I mean it.
941
00:54:19,600 --> 00:54:23,400
I've been thinkin' about
makin' a few changes.
942
00:54:23,300 --> 00:54:25,100
Like what?
943
00:54:25,000 --> 00:54:28,000
I don't know.
Just changes.
944
00:54:30,100 --> 00:54:32,000
Are you sure
that's wise, Phil?
945
00:54:32,000 --> 00:54:35,400
You've had an awful lot of changes
imposed on you in recent days.
946
00:54:35,400 --> 00:54:38,800
Maybe it's time for you to just,
you know, let things settle.
947
00:54:42,100 --> 00:54:44,200
I've been toying
with the idea...
948
00:54:44,200 --> 00:54:48,500
of pursuing
a different line of work.
949
00:54:48,400 --> 00:54:50,800
Something other
than marketing?
950
00:54:52,100 --> 00:54:54,000
Yeah.
951
00:54:54,000 --> 00:54:58,700
Speaking as your friend, Phil, as one
who knows you intimately, as it were,
952
00:54:58,600 --> 00:55:00,500
I think that's a bad idea,
953
00:55:00,500 --> 00:55:03,000
dare I say
an entirely shitty idea.
954
00:55:03,000 --> 00:55:05,600
-Why?
-Because "A," you were born for this.
955
00:55:05,600 --> 00:55:07,500
You have a gift.
956
00:55:07,500 --> 00:55:09,300
I'm not Murdoch.
957
00:55:10,500 --> 00:55:12,900
Well, nobody's Murdoch.
958
00:55:12,900 --> 00:55:16,900
Murdoch doesn't exist.
He's what we pumped him up to be.
959
00:55:16,800 --> 00:55:21,400
"B," I don't exactly relish the idea of
goin' out on the road with somebody new.
960
00:55:21,300 --> 00:55:25,700
-It was gonna happen sooner or later.
-No, it wasn't.
961
00:55:25,600 --> 00:55:30,100
I was always hoping we'd end
in a kind of murder-suicide thing.
962
00:56:24,000 --> 00:56:26,000
I've been thinking
about...
963
00:56:25,900 --> 00:56:29,200
a lot of other
things lately too.
964
00:56:30,400 --> 00:56:32,800
Well, Phil, if something's
bothering you, get it out.
965
00:56:32,700 --> 00:56:34,700
It doesn't do any good
to let things fester.
966
00:56:34,700 --> 00:56:37,900
What exactly
have you been...
967
00:56:37,900 --> 00:56:40,500
thinking so much about?
968
00:56:40,400 --> 00:56:43,100
-Life.
-Life?
969
00:56:44,200 --> 00:56:46,600
And death.
970
00:56:46,600 --> 00:56:48,800
Jesus, not you too?
What is it with everyone...
971
00:56:48,800 --> 00:56:50,800
suddenly thinking
about life and death?
972
00:56:50,800 --> 00:56:53,100
Is there something going on that nobody's
telling me that I should be told about,
973
00:56:53,100 --> 00:56:55,200
like sunspots or something?
974
00:56:55,100 --> 00:56:57,400
Is there a plague coming
to wipe us from the globe?
975
00:56:58,800 --> 00:57:01,800
-Strange things happen.
-No, they don't.
976
00:57:01,800 --> 00:57:04,300
Not unless they're printed
first in USA Today.
977
00:57:04,300 --> 00:57:06,700
Jesus comes again,
He's got to give 'em two days' notice.
978
00:57:06,600 --> 00:57:09,200
Time to work up one
of them little graphs.
979
00:57:11,100 --> 00:57:14,100
I've been thinking
about God lately too.
980
00:57:14,000 --> 00:57:16,500
Wondering.
981
00:57:16,500 --> 00:57:18,400
About God?
982
00:57:18,400 --> 00:57:20,300
Yeah.
983
00:57:22,400 --> 00:57:24,300
What about Him?
984
00:57:27,300 --> 00:57:29,600
I don't know.
985
00:57:29,600 --> 00:57:33,100
Haven't you just
wondered about God, ever?
986
00:57:35,000 --> 00:57:38,000
Yeah. Everybody wonders about God
every now and then.
987
00:57:37,900 --> 00:57:40,500
It's just some of us
don't dwell on it, you know?
988
00:57:41,700 --> 00:57:46,300
I give it a place.
I believe what I believe.
989
00:57:46,200 --> 00:57:49,900
-Which is what?
-How the hell should I know?
990
00:57:53,400 --> 00:57:56,400
When I was a kid,
I had a dream about God.
991
00:57:58,300 --> 00:58:00,300
I dreamt...
992
00:58:00,400 --> 00:58:02,900
I found Him hiding
in a closet...
993
00:58:02,900 --> 00:58:05,400
in the middle
of a burnt-out city.
994
00:58:07,000 --> 00:58:11,500
This city was destroyed
by fire...
995
00:58:11,400 --> 00:58:13,800
or some kind
of explosion.
996
00:58:16,200 --> 00:58:20,700
And... there
in the middle of it...
997
00:58:20,500 --> 00:58:23,900
was a coat closet...
998
00:58:23,900 --> 00:58:25,800
standing there
all by itself.
999
00:58:27,900 --> 00:58:31,400
And I walked up to the closet
and opened the door...
1000
00:58:33,100 --> 00:58:36,300
and inside was God,
1001
00:58:36,100 --> 00:58:38,100
hiding.
1002
00:58:39,100 --> 00:58:43,300
I remember He had a...
a big lion head.
1003
00:58:44,300 --> 00:58:47,700
But I knew
it wasn't a lion.
1004
00:58:47,600 --> 00:58:49,800
It was God.
1005
00:58:49,900 --> 00:58:51,800
And He was afraid.
1006
00:58:54,500 --> 00:58:59,200
And... I reached
out my hand...
1007
00:58:59,100 --> 00:59:01,400
to lead Him
out of the closet,
1008
00:59:03,700 --> 00:59:06,400
and I said,
1009
00:59:06,300 --> 00:59:09,800
"Don't be afraid, God.
1010
00:59:09,700 --> 00:59:11,900
I'm on Your side."
1011
00:59:14,900 --> 00:59:18,200
And we stood there,
1012
00:59:18,100 --> 00:59:20,100
the two of us,
1013
00:59:20,100 --> 00:59:22,500
holding hands,
1014
00:59:23,400 --> 00:59:25,900
looking out over
the destruction.
1015
00:59:29,400 --> 00:59:31,900
It was just after sunset.
1016
00:59:38,000 --> 00:59:42,300
I don't know why,
but I've always had this...
1017
00:59:42,100 --> 00:59:44,200
haunting feeling...
1018
00:59:46,400 --> 00:59:50,000
that I had some kind
of mission here on Earth.
1019
00:59:55,100 --> 00:59:57,100
A mission?
1020
00:59:57,100 --> 00:59:59,600
Yeah.
1021
00:59:59,600 --> 01:00:01,500
What kind
of mission?
1022
01:00:04,300 --> 01:00:06,200
I have no idea.
1023
01:00:09,200 --> 01:00:11,100
Well, I'll tell you
what your mission is.
1024
01:00:11,100 --> 01:00:13,400
Your mission is
the same as mine...
1025
01:00:13,400 --> 01:00:17,800
to be a... a liaison
between parties.
1026
01:00:20,100 --> 01:00:22,500
Things like that
don't bother you, huh?
1027
01:00:24,400 --> 01:00:27,700
-What do you mean? Dreams?
-Questions about God.
1028
01:00:31,400 --> 01:00:33,400
Well, I figure,
you know...
1029
01:00:35,000 --> 01:00:36,900
I'm gonna find out
sooner or later.
1030
01:00:36,900 --> 01:00:41,300
My wondering about it
isn't gonna change anything.
1031
01:00:41,200 --> 01:00:45,200
In the meantime, why lose sleep?
I get precious little as it is.
1032
01:00:47,500 --> 01:00:50,100
But you still wonder,
don't you?
1033
01:00:54,300 --> 01:00:56,700
I'm human, Phil.
1034
01:00:56,700 --> 01:00:58,600
I know.
1035
01:01:00,000 --> 01:01:03,700
We're all very tired, Phil.
It's the nature of the business.
1036
01:01:03,700 --> 01:01:06,300
You've been under a lot of stress
lately too.
1037
01:01:08,000 --> 01:01:10,300
Is that what it is?
1038
01:01:10,300 --> 01:01:12,900
Yeah. You're damn right
that's what it is.
1039
01:01:12,900 --> 01:01:14,800
You need a vacation.
1040
01:01:16,400 --> 01:01:20,100
-I just had a vacation.
-It didn't do any good, so you need another one.
1041
01:01:20,100 --> 01:01:23,200
You know, maybe just
a good, hot date.
1042
01:01:23,100 --> 01:01:25,000
-Yeah?
-Yeah.
1043
01:01:25,000 --> 01:01:27,700
You need what's-her-name,
the blonde.
1044
01:01:29,400 --> 01:01:33,200
-Susan.
-Yeah. Susan.
1045
01:01:33,100 --> 01:01:35,700
That's exactly what you do.
You call her up,
1046
01:01:35,700 --> 01:01:38,500
you tell her you made reservations
in the Dells,
1047
01:01:38,500 --> 01:01:41,900
you buy yourself a gross
or two of condoms,
1048
01:01:41,800 --> 01:01:44,600
and then the two of you
go at it like hamsters in heat.
1049
01:01:44,600 --> 01:01:47,100
You forget about work.
You forget about everything.
1050
01:01:47,100 --> 01:01:49,900
You just go on up there
and get your ashes hauled.
1051
01:02:47,500 --> 01:02:49,600
Do you love me, Larry?
1052
01:02:54,600 --> 01:02:57,400
D-Do I love you?
1053
01:02:57,400 --> 01:02:59,300
Yeah.
1054
01:02:59,200 --> 01:03:03,200
Well, it depends on what you mean, Phil.
I mean...
1055
01:03:03,200 --> 01:03:06,100
If you're asking, am I willing
to have your children, well, then, no,
1056
01:03:06,000 --> 01:03:08,200
I probably don't love you.
1057
01:03:09,200 --> 01:03:10,400
Why do you ask?
1058
01:03:10,400 --> 01:03:11,400
Why do you ask?
1059
01:03:11,400 --> 01:03:13,900
It's just a question.
1060
01:03:13,900 --> 01:03:16,900
How could I not love you?
1061
01:03:16,800 --> 01:03:20,300
You have good hygiene.
You're a snappy dresser.
1062
01:03:20,200 --> 01:03:23,600
You don't talk with your mouth full.
What's not to love about that?
1063
01:03:25,800 --> 01:03:28,100
Forget it.
1064
01:03:29,800 --> 01:03:32,100
What brought that on?
1065
01:03:33,300 --> 01:03:36,200
Well, when I was a kid,
1066
01:03:36,200 --> 01:03:39,100
there was a Bible verse
that I learned.
1067
01:03:40,700 --> 01:03:42,700
And Jesus said,
1068
01:03:45,100 --> 01:03:48,400
"Greater love has
no man than this:
1069
01:03:48,300 --> 01:03:50,900
that he lays down
his life for his friend."
1070
01:03:52,700 --> 01:03:56,000
Are you asking,
would I be willing to die for you?
1071
01:03:57,000 --> 01:03:59,900
I guess so.
1072
01:04:00,900 --> 01:04:03,400
That's pushing things
kind of far, Phil.
1073
01:04:03,400 --> 01:04:06,700
I mean, what situation
could possibly come up...
1074
01:04:06,600 --> 01:04:09,600
that I would be called upon
to die for you?
1075
01:04:12,700 --> 01:04:15,000
Beats me.
1076
01:04:15,000 --> 01:04:16,900
I mean, what?
You're saying, "Hey, hey.
1077
01:04:16,900 --> 01:04:19,900
"Larry, take a flying leap
off the balcony"? No, I wouldn't.
1078
01:04:22,600 --> 01:04:24,700
I wouldn't ask you.
1079
01:04:26,200 --> 01:04:28,700
Well, even if you did,
I'd say, "Phil, my friend,
1080
01:04:28,700 --> 01:04:31,100
"we've enjoyed a long
and happy relationship...
1081
01:04:31,000 --> 01:04:33,000
"these last I-don't-know-
how-many years,
1082
01:04:33,000 --> 01:04:36,100
"but in answer to your request, no, fuck you,"
and then I would dismiss myself,
1083
01:04:36,100 --> 01:04:38,200
no hard feelings.
1084
01:04:40,900 --> 01:04:42,800
Right. You should.
1085
01:04:51,200 --> 01:04:54,000
I don't know who I love.
1086
01:04:57,000 --> 01:04:59,000
There's a lot
of people I like.
1087
01:05:04,800 --> 01:05:06,800
But love?
1088
01:05:11,600 --> 01:05:14,300
That's a whole
different story.
1089
01:05:17,900 --> 01:05:19,800
Don't worry about it.
1090
01:05:22,000 --> 01:05:24,000
Yeah.
1091
01:05:34,600 --> 01:05:38,100
Oh, he's here.
1092
01:05:38,100 --> 01:05:40,600
I told you.
1093
01:05:41,900 --> 01:05:44,900
So. What?
1094
01:05:44,900 --> 01:05:46,800
How'd it go?
1095
01:05:46,800 --> 01:05:49,800
-Okay.
-Did you find him?
1096
01:05:52,900 --> 01:05:55,000
Yes, I-I found him.
1097
01:05:55,000 --> 01:05:58,700
-And?
-And we talked.
1098
01:06:00,300 --> 01:06:05,200
-And?
-And nothing. We just talked.
1099
01:06:05,000 --> 01:06:08,200
Well, what'd you talk
about, Bob?
1100
01:06:09,600 --> 01:06:12,800
Bob, what did you
talk about?
1101
01:06:12,700 --> 01:06:15,500
We talked about Christ.
1102
01:06:23,100 --> 01:06:26,800
-You talked about...
-Jesus.
1103
01:06:26,800 --> 01:06:31,000
Did you mention, perhaps, what line of industrial
lubricants Jesus would have endorsed?
1104
01:06:30,900 --> 01:06:33,500
-Larry...
-What did you say to him, Bob?
1105
01:06:36,300 --> 01:06:39,300
We just...
discussed things.
1106
01:06:39,200 --> 01:06:41,700
Concerning Jesus?
1107
01:06:41,700 --> 01:06:44,800
-Concerning a lot of things.
-In relation to...
1108
01:06:44,700 --> 01:06:47,100
-Jesus.
-Jesus.
1109
01:06:47,000 --> 01:06:49,100
Yes, I see.
1110
01:06:52,400 --> 01:06:55,200
So the subject of lubricants
didn't come up, I take it.
1111
01:06:55,200 --> 01:06:58,800
The nature of the conversation
steered itself away from that.
1112
01:06:58,700 --> 01:07:02,600
The nature did?
All by itself?
1113
01:07:02,600 --> 01:07:04,200
Yes.
1114
01:07:04,200 --> 01:07:08,100
So, conversation was
Just kind of going along,
1115
01:07:07,900 --> 01:07:09,900
you know, on its own,
1116
01:07:09,900 --> 01:07:12,300
and then suddenly,
out of the blue,
1117
01:07:12,200 --> 01:07:14,300
and before you knew it,
you were just there talking about God...
1118
01:07:14,300 --> 01:07:16,300
or Jesus... excuse me.
1119
01:07:16,200 --> 01:07:19,100
It was just
two people talking.
1120
01:07:20,000 --> 01:07:23,300
I'm about to say
something to you, Bob.
1121
01:07:23,200 --> 01:07:25,600
It's not something I say
to a lot of people,
1122
01:07:25,600 --> 01:07:28,900
because I have to truly
mean it and believe it.
1123
01:07:28,800 --> 01:07:31,800
Because to me, it's like
telling somebody to go to hell.
1124
01:07:31,800 --> 01:07:34,200
That's what it means to me.
1125
01:07:34,200 --> 01:07:38,000
-What is it?
-It's that I don't believe you, Bob.
1126
01:07:37,900 --> 01:07:40,900
-You don't...
-Believe you. Yes.
1127
01:07:40,800 --> 01:07:44,500
I'm having a hard time
convincing myself...
1128
01:07:44,400 --> 01:07:46,600
that what you
Just said is true.
1129
01:07:46,600 --> 01:07:49,800
-It is true.
-Perhaps.
1130
01:07:49,800 --> 01:07:53,100
But I'm having a hard time.
Do you understand?
1131
01:07:53,000 --> 01:07:55,200
-Come on.
-Leave me alone!
1132
01:07:56,800 --> 01:07:59,100
Will you please...
1133
01:08:00,800 --> 01:08:05,000
I'm trying to deal with things here,
okay, so just don't interrupt me again.
1134
01:08:04,900 --> 01:08:08,300
-It's all right, Phil.
-See? It's all right.
1135
01:08:13,000 --> 01:08:15,300
Now, Bob, I'd like
to ask you a question,
1136
01:08:15,300 --> 01:08:17,400
and I'd like
a straight answer.
1137
01:08:17,400 --> 01:08:19,000
-Can you give that?
-Yes.
1138
01:08:19,000 --> 01:08:21,900
Who raised...
1139
01:08:21,900 --> 01:08:25,600
the subject of Jesus,
honestly?
1140
01:08:38,400 --> 01:08:41,300
-I did.
-You...
1141
01:08:41,300 --> 01:08:43,200
Yes.
1142
01:08:43,200 --> 01:08:45,800
mentioned Jesus first.
1143
01:08:46,700 --> 01:08:48,900
Yes.
1144
01:08:51,600 --> 01:08:53,500
Why?
1145
01:08:54,800 --> 01:08:58,000
Because it's very
important to me...
1146
01:08:57,900 --> 01:09:01,200
that people hear
about Jesus.
1147
01:09:04,900 --> 01:09:07,600
You mean, that...
1148
01:09:07,600 --> 01:09:10,200
that He died
for their sins?
1149
01:09:10,100 --> 01:09:12,100
Yes.
1150
01:09:16,800 --> 01:09:19,900
Okay, Bob. Let me
restate the question.
1151
01:09:19,900 --> 01:09:22,600
Understanding
that it was...
1152
01:09:22,600 --> 01:09:24,800
very important
to our being here...
1153
01:09:24,700 --> 01:09:27,700
that we meet with
and speak to Mr. Fuller...
1154
01:09:27,700 --> 01:09:32,100
concerning
the lubricant situation,
1155
01:09:33,400 --> 01:09:36,000
why did you instead...
1156
01:09:36,000 --> 01:09:38,700
choose to talk
to him about Jesus?
1157
01:09:42,200 --> 01:09:44,500
Because I think
it's more important.
1158
01:09:45,800 --> 01:09:48,600
Even though we're at a convention
where it's more customary...
1159
01:09:48,600 --> 01:09:51,000
to talk business.
1160
01:09:51,000 --> 01:09:54,800
Yes!
I understand, Larry.
1161
01:09:54,600 --> 01:09:57,200
I just don't see
the crime in speaking...
1162
01:09:57,100 --> 01:10:01,900
to, uh, another human being
as another human being.
1163
01:10:01,800 --> 01:10:04,500
I didn't mention work or lubricants
or anything like that...
1164
01:10:04,500 --> 01:10:06,700
because I didn't want him
to think I was using...
1165
01:10:06,700 --> 01:10:09,900
the subject of religion
to cozy up to him,
1166
01:10:09,900 --> 01:10:13,900
to get him to sign
some contract.
1167
01:10:13,800 --> 01:10:16,400
I didn't want him
to think I was insincere.
1168
01:10:19,200 --> 01:10:23,100
But you were insincere, Bob,
in a much greater sense.
1169
01:10:22,900 --> 01:10:23,500
But you were insincere, Bob,
in a much greater sense.
1170
01:10:23,600 --> 01:10:27,300
If we're nothing but functions here,
then why don't they just send robots?
1171
01:10:27,200 --> 01:10:29,700
They don't send robots, Bob,
for the simple reason,
1172
01:10:29,700 --> 01:10:31,900
they haven't
invented one yet.
1173
01:10:31,900 --> 01:10:34,000
The day comes
when they can build a robot...
1174
01:10:34,100 --> 01:10:36,700
to do what we do
and make it work,
1175
01:10:36,600 --> 01:10:38,700
then that's exactly
what they'll do,
1176
01:10:38,800 --> 01:10:40,700
precisely.
1177
01:10:40,700 --> 01:10:43,100
But until that day,
they send us.
1178
01:10:43,000 --> 01:10:45,600
They say, "Hey, Bob,
Larry, Phil,
1179
01:10:45,600 --> 01:10:48,100
"why don't you go on down to Wichita
for a couple of days?
1180
01:10:48,000 --> 01:10:50,600
Don't worry about your room and board.
We'll take care of that."
1181
01:10:50,500 --> 01:10:53,800
And for a couple
of days, Bob,
1182
01:10:53,800 --> 01:10:56,300
we lose
our identities...
1183
01:10:56,300 --> 01:10:58,200
here in Wichita,
1184
01:10:58,200 --> 01:11:02,700
and we become
the hands of the company,
1185
01:11:02,500 --> 01:11:05,200
shaking all the other
hands before us.
1186
01:11:05,200 --> 01:11:07,800
What you did, the reason
you were insincere,
1187
01:11:07,800 --> 01:11:10,100
is that you
cut off that bond.
1188
01:11:10,100 --> 01:11:13,500
It would be like the hand Just sort of
breaking away from the arm and saying,
1189
01:11:13,500 --> 01:11:17,900
"Oh, you know what? I have this thing out here
to do that has nothing to do with you."
1190
01:11:17,800 --> 01:11:20,200
-The apostle Paul said...
-Please don't do that.
1191
01:11:20,100 --> 01:11:24,200
I'm trying to have conversation. Please don't
bring Paul in. I'm trying to do something else.
1192
01:11:24,000 --> 01:11:26,000
I don't see how we can have
a conversation like this...
1193
01:11:25,900 --> 01:11:28,300
if I'm not allowed to bring up
the subject of God.
1194
01:11:28,300 --> 01:11:30,700
I'm talking about something
bigger than God.
1195
01:11:30,700 --> 01:11:33,800
-Bigger than God?
-At issue, Bob, is not your belief in God...
1196
01:11:33,800 --> 01:11:36,000
or your desire
to spread that belief.
1197
01:11:35,900 --> 01:11:37,900
At issue is what
we're here to do.
1198
01:11:37,900 --> 01:11:39,800
Which is what, Larry?
1199
01:11:39,800 --> 01:11:42,400
We're here to sell
lubricants, Bob...
1200
01:11:42,400 --> 01:11:46,000
industrial lubricants...
not to save souls.
1201
01:11:46,000 --> 01:11:50,400
We're not here to go chasing women either,
but that doesn't stop you.
1202
01:11:50,300 --> 01:11:53,100
How dare you throw that
back in my face?
1203
01:11:53,100 --> 01:11:55,500
How dare you,
you little pipsqueak?
1204
01:11:57,200 --> 01:12:01,900
There is nothing wrong with admiring
the scenery while you're doing business,
1205
01:12:01,700 --> 01:12:05,400
as long as you're
doing business!
1206
01:12:05,400 --> 01:12:08,400
And for your information,
son,
1207
01:12:08,300 --> 01:12:10,200
fifteen years,
1208
01:12:10,200 --> 01:12:14,000
not once have I cheated
on my wife.
1209
01:12:13,900 --> 01:12:17,000
If you look at a woman with lust,
it's the same as...
1210
01:12:17,000 --> 01:12:20,000
-No, it's not! There's a hell of a difference.
-That's not what Jesus said.
1211
01:12:19,900 --> 01:12:22,500
How do you know what Jesus said,
for Christ's sake? Were you there?
1212
01:12:22,500 --> 01:12:25,000
-No, somebody wrote it down in a book.
-Larry.
1213
01:12:25,000 --> 01:12:28,100
-If somebody handed it down, you believe it, sure.
-Transcriptions are true!
1214
01:12:28,000 --> 01:12:30,700
It could mean I'm right or you're right.
We weren't there!
1215
01:12:30,600 --> 01:12:33,400
-The Bible specifically says...
-Don't you quote Scripture to me, Bob.
1216
01:12:33,300 --> 01:12:36,000
-Do not do it!
-I go back to what the apostle Paul...
1217
01:12:36,000 --> 01:12:39,500
The apostle Paul was not sent
to Wichita to hawk...
1218
01:12:39,300 --> 01:12:43,000
Larry. Larry.
1219
01:12:44,900 --> 01:12:47,100
Larry!
1220
01:12:48,300 --> 01:12:50,300
Larry. Larry!
1221
01:12:57,300 --> 01:13:00,100
With or without
the account,
1222
01:13:00,000 --> 01:13:01,900
we'll live.
1223
01:13:03,000 --> 01:13:05,000
Come on.
1224
01:13:09,100 --> 01:13:11,000
I'm sorry.
1225
01:13:16,000 --> 01:13:18,000
Yes.
1226
01:13:19,100 --> 01:13:21,600
We'll live.
1227
01:13:21,600 --> 01:13:24,000
We'll live.
1228
01:13:24,000 --> 01:13:26,800
I believe
I just said that.
1229
01:13:47,900 --> 01:13:51,900
I'm suddenly very conscious
of the lateness of things.
1230
01:13:58,700 --> 01:14:01,700
What time do you want to get together
in the morning?
1231
01:14:06,700 --> 01:14:08,600
Doesn't matter.
1232
01:14:08,600 --> 01:14:10,500
What time?
1233
01:14:12,000 --> 01:14:14,000
7:30.
1234
01:14:13,900 --> 01:14:16,400
Make it 8:00.
1235
01:14:17,800 --> 01:14:19,700
Fine. 8:00.
1236
01:14:23,300 --> 01:14:25,900
Forgive me, Bob, for...
1237
01:14:25,900 --> 01:14:29,300
behaving as though
I were your father,
1238
01:14:29,200 --> 01:14:32,700
for trying to give you
a little something of...
1239
01:14:34,500 --> 01:14:36,500
what I am.
1240
01:14:40,700 --> 01:14:42,600
It's all right.
1241
01:14:49,300 --> 01:14:51,400
Larry.
1242
01:14:53,800 --> 01:14:55,900
Good night.
1243
01:15:36,900 --> 01:15:39,500
There's somethin'
I wanna say to you.
1244
01:15:43,100 --> 01:15:46,300
And I want you to listen
very closely...
1245
01:15:48,500 --> 01:15:50,600
because
it's very important.
1246
01:15:54,500 --> 01:15:57,000
The man we just chased
from here...
1247
01:15:56,900 --> 01:15:59,200
We didn't chase anybody.
1248
01:15:59,200 --> 01:16:02,800
The man who just left
the room...
1249
01:16:02,700 --> 01:16:04,600
a moment ago...
1250
01:16:06,000 --> 01:16:08,600
is a very good friend
of mine.
1251
01:16:08,600 --> 01:16:12,500
Is it because I've known him
for a long time?
1252
01:16:12,400 --> 01:16:14,900
Well, there are a lot of people...
1253
01:16:14,800 --> 01:16:17,600
who I've known for quite a while.
1254
01:16:17,600 --> 01:16:21,200
And some of them
I wouldn't let wipe my dog's ass.
1255
01:16:21,200 --> 01:16:24,900
Others I can take or leave.
They don't matter to me.
1256
01:16:26,100 --> 01:16:29,100
But Larry matters
very much,
1257
01:16:28,900 --> 01:16:31,400
the reason being...
1258
01:16:31,400 --> 01:16:33,500
I can trust him.
1259
01:16:33,500 --> 01:16:36,000
I know I can trust him.
1260
01:16:36,000 --> 01:16:37,900
He's honest.
1261
01:16:37,900 --> 01:16:40,600
Is he honest,
1262
01:16:40,500 --> 01:16:42,500
or is he just blunt?
1263
01:16:44,000 --> 01:16:46,900
He's honest, Bob.
1264
01:16:47,900 --> 01:16:49,900
He's blunt as well.
1265
01:16:49,800 --> 01:16:52,200
That sometimes
is part of being honest,
1266
01:16:53,700 --> 01:16:57,900
because there are a lot of people
who are blunt but not honest.
1267
01:16:57,800 --> 01:17:00,800
Larry is not one of those.
1268
01:17:00,800 --> 01:17:03,100
Larry is an honest man.
1269
01:17:07,700 --> 01:17:10,100
You, too,
are an honest man.
1270
01:17:10,100 --> 01:17:14,400
I believe that somewhere
deep down inside of you...
1271
01:17:14,300 --> 01:17:17,800
is something that strives
to be honest.
1272
01:17:17,700 --> 01:17:20,700
The question that you
have to ask yourself...
1273
01:17:20,600 --> 01:17:25,200
is, "Has it touched
the whole of my life?"
1274
01:17:26,300 --> 01:17:28,900
What does that mean?
1275
01:17:28,900 --> 01:17:31,500
That means that you preaching Jesus
is no different...
1276
01:17:31,500 --> 01:17:35,100
than Larry or anybody else
preaching lubricants.
1277
01:17:35,000 --> 01:17:38,400
It doesn't matter whether you're
selling Jesus or Buddha...
1278
01:17:38,400 --> 01:17:40,300
or civil rights...
1279
01:17:40,300 --> 01:17:44,900
or how to make money in real estate
with no money down.
1280
01:17:44,700 --> 01:17:47,300
That doesn't make you
a human being.
1281
01:17:47,300 --> 01:17:49,600
It makes you
a marketing rep.
1282
01:17:49,600 --> 01:17:52,700
If you wanna talk
to somebody honestly,
1283
01:17:52,700 --> 01:17:54,600
as a human being,
1284
01:17:55,700 --> 01:17:58,700
ask him about his kids.
1285
01:17:58,600 --> 01:18:02,100
Find out what his dreams are,
Just to find out.
1286
01:18:02,100 --> 01:18:04,000
For no other reason.
1287
01:18:04,000 --> 01:18:07,200
Because as soon as you lay your hands
on a conversation,
1288
01:18:07,100 --> 01:18:09,000
to steer it,
1289
01:18:09,100 --> 01:18:11,600
it's not a conversation
anymore.
1290
01:18:11,600 --> 01:18:14,700
It's a pitch,
and you're not a human being.
1291
01:18:14,600 --> 01:18:17,300
You're a marketing rep.
1292
01:18:18,200 --> 01:18:22,000
Forgive me if I
respectfully disagree.
1293
01:18:21,900 --> 01:18:25,300
We were talking before
about... character.
1294
01:18:25,200 --> 01:18:28,500
You were asking me
about character.
1295
01:18:28,400 --> 01:18:30,700
We were speaking
of faces.
1296
01:18:30,700 --> 01:18:33,100
But the question
is much deeper than that.
1297
01:18:34,600 --> 01:18:36,500
The question is...
1298
01:18:36,500 --> 01:18:40,200
do you have
any character at all?
1299
01:18:40,100 --> 01:18:44,000
And if you want my honest opinion,
Bob, you do not,
1300
01:18:44,000 --> 01:18:46,400
for the simple reason...
1301
01:18:47,900 --> 01:18:51,600
that you don't regret
anything yet.
1302
01:18:51,600 --> 01:18:54,500
You're saying I won't have
any character...
1303
01:18:54,400 --> 01:18:56,600
unless I do something
I regret?
1304
01:18:56,500 --> 01:18:58,500
No, Bob.
1305
01:18:59,900 --> 01:19:03,300
I'm saying you've already done
plenty of things to regret.
1306
01:19:03,300 --> 01:19:06,700
You just don't know
what they are.
1307
01:19:08,100 --> 01:19:11,100
It's when you
discover them,
1308
01:19:13,000 --> 01:19:16,600
when you see the folly
in something you've done...
1309
01:19:16,600 --> 01:19:18,500
and you wish...
1310
01:19:18,500 --> 01:19:21,600
that you had it
to do over,
1311
01:19:21,600 --> 01:19:24,500
but you know you can't...
1312
01:19:24,500 --> 01:19:26,800
'cause it's too late.
1313
01:19:30,100 --> 01:19:33,900
So you pick that thing up
and you carry it with you...
1314
01:19:33,900 --> 01:19:36,900
to remind you
that life goes on.
1315
01:19:36,700 --> 01:19:39,900
The world will spin
without you.
1316
01:19:39,900 --> 01:19:42,900
You really don't matter
in the end.
1317
01:19:44,800 --> 01:19:47,700
Then you will attain
character.
1318
01:19:48,900 --> 01:19:51,700
Because honesty...
1319
01:19:52,800 --> 01:19:55,300
will reach out
from inside...
1320
01:19:58,000 --> 01:20:02,000
and tattoo itself
all across your face.
1321
01:20:03,100 --> 01:20:05,000
Until that day,
1322
01:20:06,600 --> 01:20:08,500
however,
1323
01:20:11,700 --> 01:20:16,200
you cannot expect to go
beyond a certain point.
1324
01:20:21,500 --> 01:20:23,200
May I go now?
1325
01:20:24,400 --> 01:20:27,000
Go ahead.
1326
01:20:28,500 --> 01:20:30,500
Thank you.
1327
01:21:00,400 --> 01:21:02,400
Good night.
1328
01:21:27,300 --> 01:21:29,200
Hello?
1329
01:21:31,800 --> 01:21:34,700
No, you just...
you just missed him.
1330
01:21:37,700 --> 01:21:39,600
What's that?
1331
01:21:44,800 --> 01:21:46,800
I love you too.
1332
01:21:50,700 --> 01:21:52,700
Yeah.
1333
01:22:03,100 --> 01:22:06,200
Enjoy the power and beauty
of your youth.
1334
01:22:06,100 --> 01:22:08,100
Oh, never mind.
1335
01:22:08,000 --> 01:22:10,200
You will not understand
the power and beauty of your youth...
1336
01:22:10,200 --> 01:22:12,100
until they've faded.
1337
01:22:12,100 --> 01:22:16,100
But trust me, in 20 years you'll look
back at photos of yourself...
1338
01:22:16,000 --> 01:22:19,000
and recall in a way
you can't grasp now...
1339
01:22:19,000 --> 01:22:21,400
how much possibility
lay before you...
1340
01:22:21,400 --> 01:22:23,500
and how fabulous
you really looked.
1341
01:22:23,500 --> 01:22:26,800
You are not as fat
as you imagine.
1342
01:22:29,400 --> 01:22:31,400
Don't worry
about the future,
1343
01:22:31,400 --> 01:22:33,600
or worry
but know that worrying...
1344
01:22:33,600 --> 01:22:36,700
is as effective as trying to solve
an algebra equation...
1345
01:22:36,600 --> 01:22:39,000
by chewing bubble gum.
1346
01:22:38,900 --> 01:22:41,900
The real troubles in your life
are apt to be things...
1347
01:22:41,800 --> 01:22:44,000
that never crossed
your worried mind,
1348
01:22:44,100 --> 01:22:48,000
the kind that blindsides you
at 4:00 p.m. on some idle Tuesday.
1349
01:22:48,900 --> 01:22:52,800
Do one thing every day
that scares you.
1350
01:22:52,800 --> 01:22:54,400
Sing.
1351
01:22:54,400 --> 01:22:56,800
Don't be reckless
with other people's hearts.
1352
01:22:56,800 --> 01:23:00,300
Don't put up with people
who are reckless with yours.
1353
01:23:00,300 --> 01:23:01,800
Floss.
1354
01:23:01,700 --> 01:23:04,100
Don't waste your time
on jealousy.
1355
01:23:04,000 --> 01:23:06,000
Sometimes you're ahead.
1356
01:23:05,900 --> 01:23:08,100
Sometimes you're behind.
1357
01:23:08,100 --> 01:23:10,700
The race is long,
and in the end,
1358
01:23:10,700 --> 01:23:12,600
it's only with yourself.
1359
01:23:14,200 --> 01:23:16,800
Remember compliments
you receive.
1360
01:23:16,700 --> 01:23:18,700
Forget the insults.
1361
01:23:18,700 --> 01:23:22,000
If you succeed in doing this,
tell me how.
1362
01:23:21,800 --> 01:23:23,800
Keep your old love letters.
1363
01:23:23,800 --> 01:23:26,500
Throw away
your old bank statements.
1364
01:23:28,100 --> 01:23:30,000
Stretch.
1365
01:23:30,000 --> 01:23:32,800
Don't feel guilty if you don't know
what you want to do with your life.
1366
01:23:32,700 --> 01:23:36,200
The most interesting people
I know didn't know at 22...
1367
01:23:36,100 --> 01:23:37,900
what they wanted to do
with their lives.
1368
01:23:38,000 --> 01:23:42,100
Some of the most interesting
40-year-olds I know still don't.
1369
01:23:42,000 --> 01:23:44,900
Get plenty of calcium.
1370
01:23:44,900 --> 01:23:49,100
Be kind to your knees.
You'll miss them when they're gone.
1371
01:23:48,900 --> 01:23:51,600
Maybe you'll marry.
Maybe you won't.
1372
01:23:51,500 --> 01:23:54,400
Maybe you'll have children.
Maybe you won't.
1373
01:23:54,300 --> 01:23:56,300
Maybe you'll divorce at 40.
1374
01:23:56,200 --> 01:23:59,800
Maybe you'll dance the funky chicken
on your 75th wedding anniversary.
1375
01:23:59,700 --> 01:24:02,800
Whatever you do,
don't congratulate yourself too much...
1376
01:24:02,800 --> 01:24:04,700
or berate yourself either.
1377
01:24:04,700 --> 01:24:07,100
Your choices are half chance.
1378
01:24:07,000 --> 01:24:10,100
So are everybody else's.
1379
01:24:10,000 --> 01:24:13,500
Enjoy your body.
Use it every way you can.
1380
01:24:13,400 --> 01:24:16,300
Don't be afraid of it
or what other people think of it.
1381
01:24:16,300 --> 01:24:19,100
It's the greatest instrument
you'll ever own.
1382
01:24:19,000 --> 01:24:20,600
Dance,
1383
01:24:20,600 --> 01:24:23,500
even if you have nowhere to do it
but in your own living room.
1384
01:24:23,500 --> 01:24:26,300
Read the directions
even if you don't follow them.
1385
01:24:26,200 --> 01:24:28,300
Do not read beauty magazines.
1386
01:24:28,300 --> 01:24:31,300
They will only
make you feel ugly.
1387
01:24:37,300 --> 01:24:39,800
Get to know your parents.
1388
01:24:39,800 --> 01:24:42,200
You never know
when they'll be gone for good.
1389
01:24:42,200 --> 01:24:44,300
Be nice to your siblings.
1390
01:24:44,300 --> 01:24:47,200
They're your best link to your past
and the people most likely...
1391
01:24:47,200 --> 01:24:49,600
to stick with you
in the future.
1392
01:24:52,300 --> 01:24:55,100
Understand that friends
come and go,
1393
01:24:55,100 --> 01:24:57,900
but with the precious few
you should hold on.
1394
01:24:57,900 --> 01:25:01,700
Work hard to bridge the gaps
in geography and lifestyle.
1395
01:25:01,600 --> 01:25:03,600
The older you get,
1396
01:25:03,600 --> 01:25:07,200
the more you need the people
you knew when you were young.
1397
01:25:08,700 --> 01:25:13,100
Live in New York City once,
but leave before it makes you hard.
1398
01:25:13,000 --> 01:25:14,900
Life in Northern California
once,
1399
01:25:14,900 --> 01:25:18,000
but leave before
it makes you soft.
1400
01:25:18,000 --> 01:25:20,000
Travel.
1401
01:25:20,000 --> 01:25:22,200
Don't mess too much
with your hair...
1402
01:25:22,200 --> 01:25:25,100
or by the time you're 40,
it will look 85.
1403
01:25:26,800 --> 01:25:29,300
Be careful
whose advice you buy,
1404
01:25:29,300 --> 01:25:32,200
but be patient
with those who supply it.
1405
01:25:32,200 --> 01:25:35,400
Advice is a form
of nostalgia.
1406
01:25:35,400 --> 01:25:39,400
Dispensing it is a way of fishing the past
from the disposal,
1407
01:25:39,300 --> 01:25:42,700
wiping it off,
painting over the ugly parts...
1408
01:25:42,500 --> 01:25:45,700
and recycling it
for more than it's worth.
1409
01:25:46,800 --> 01:25:49,800
But trust me
on the sunscreen.