1
00:01:13,076 --> 00:01:16,751
Oh! Man, oh, man!

2
00:01:16,836 --> 00:01:20,624
I almost lost it back there.
I didn't know what was going on.

3
00:01:45,796 --> 00:01:48,913
- Oh, hey, babe? Doug?
- Huh?

4
00:01:48,996 --> 00:01:51,874
Can you take Billy to school?
My day got away from me.

5
00:01:51,956 --> 00:01:54,675
Yeah. Unless there'
an emergency at the office.

6
00:01:54,756 --> 00:01:56,030
Was there an emergency?

7
00:01:56,116 --> 00:01:58,232
You know, dentists
do have emergencies.

8
00:01:59,316 --> 00:02:00,465
Sometimes.

9
00:02:02,956 --> 00:02:04,275
We are doctors.

10
00:02:06,956 --> 00:02:09,789
Hey, no, no! Not untiI your LDL
is under a hundred.

11
00:02:12,356 --> 00:02:15,712
Well, Mr Putnam,
any plans this summer?

12
00:02:18,356 --> 00:02:21,712
- What'... What'd he say?
- We're taking an African safari.

13
00:02:21,796 --> 00:02:24,868
Africa. I don't think I've been
out of Cincinnati in 12 years.

14
00:02:24,956 --> 00:02:28,073
You owe it to yourself
to get out and enjoy life.

15
00:02:28,156 --> 00:02:32,468
You can't just live to work!
You need excitement!

16
00:02:34,116 --> 00:02:35,629
Come on. Don't be a baby,

17
00:02:35,716 --> 00:02:38,708
it' a d... Oh, the suction,
the extractor. Hold on.

18
00:02:38,796 --> 00:02:41,310
That'll suck the spots
off a Dalmatian.

19
00:02:41,396 --> 00:02:42,829
Help me, help me, all right.

20
00:02:42,916 --> 00:02:45,669
Know what they call this?
Powerful little sucker.

21
00:02:45,756 --> 00:02:48,031
That' the brand name.
It' unbelievable.

22
00:02:48,116 --> 00:02:51,153
See? I have plenty of excitement
in my life, Mrs Putnam.

23
00:02:56,596 --> 00:02:57,551
<i>Bobby?</i>

24
00:02:57,636 --> 00:02:59,945
Karen, I asked for no disturbances.

25
00:03:00,036 --> 00:03:01,788
<i>I need to talk to you, Bobby.</i>

26
00:03:01,876 --> 00:03:04,185
Technically,
I'm at the office right now.

27
00:03:04,276 --> 00:03:06,631
And technically, you're
in our guest bedroom.

28
00:03:06,716 --> 00:03:09,992
Look, I know baby. I just
gotta finish this chapter, all right?

29
00:03:10,076 --> 00:03:11,225
I know. But know what?

30
00:03:11,316 --> 00:03:13,750
I have to go to a job
that actually makes us money.

31
00:03:13,836 --> 00:03:15,906
I'm late,
walk me to the door.

32
00:03:15,996 --> 00:03:18,066
Come on, Bobby.
I gotta get to work. OK?

33
00:03:18,156 --> 00:03:20,147
Wait. I forgot my cell phone.

34
00:03:20,236 --> 00:03:22,386
- Stay.
- Hey, Daddy! Listen!

35
00:03:25,156 --> 00:03:28,193
Hey, no. Inside voice. Inside voice.

36
00:03:28,276 --> 00:03:29,425
Would you shut up?!

37
00:03:29,516 --> 00:03:32,235
God, it' like living
with a car alarm that shits.

38
00:03:32,316 --> 00:03:35,865
Whoa. What're you doing
trying to leave wearing that?

39
00:03:35,956 --> 00:03:38,914
- You look like a Eskimo hooker.
- Dad, that' the point.

40
00:03:38,996 --> 00:03:42,272
- You wanna look like a hooker?
- Dad, you are so lame.

41
00:03:42,356 --> 00:03:46,395
It' hard for kids to respect a man
that don't do none of the providing.

42
00:03:46,476 --> 00:03:50,628
In my day the lady stayed home.
Not the lazy man.

43
00:03:50,716 --> 00:03:52,911
In your day the men
had pyramids to build.

44
00:03:52,996 --> 00:03:54,315
How old is that?

45
00:03:54,396 --> 00:03:56,910
I'm in complete control
of my financial...

46
00:03:56,996 --> 00:03:58,987
No.

47
00:03:59,076 --> 00:04:01,749
Hush. Come.

48
00:04:01,836 --> 00:04:04,589
How come she gets quiet
when you say something to her?

49
00:04:04,676 --> 00:04:06,871
Because you, my darling,
have no control.

50
00:04:06,956 --> 00:04:10,869
Baby, I know your how-to book is
gonna be a huge success someday.

51
00:04:10,956 --> 00:04:12,992
But do you remember
what day today is?

52
00:04:13,076 --> 00:04:14,065
No.

53
00:04:14,156 --> 00:04:16,147
We agreed that you
would take a year off

54
00:04:16,236 --> 00:04:19,626
to pursue this little fantasy
of yours, but that year is up.

55
00:04:19,716 --> 00:04:21,195
Now, you and I had a deal.

56
00:04:21,276 --> 00:04:23,790
Come on, baby. Stressful cases.

57
00:04:23,876 --> 00:04:25,832
Clients under duress.

58
00:04:25,916 --> 00:04:28,749
I'm tired of dealing
with shit all the time.

59
00:04:28,836 --> 00:04:31,634
Besides, how do we even
know they'll take me back?

60
00:04:31,716 --> 00:04:33,627
- Because I called.
- You're serious?

61
00:04:33,716 --> 00:04:36,788
The Firm is ecstatic
to have you back, Bobby.

62
00:04:36,876 --> 00:04:38,707
You got a 9.00 appointment.

63
00:04:40,716 --> 00:04:43,674
- You call The Firm?
- Yeah, men' room.

64
00:04:43,756 --> 00:04:47,066
Some truck' driver must've crap
an entire cow in there, man.

65
00:04:47,156 --> 00:04:48,111
Good luck.

66
00:04:51,836 --> 00:04:53,554
I didn't want to give him the key,

67
00:04:53,636 --> 00:04:55,467
but I didn't trust my instincts.

68
00:05:01,716 --> 00:05:05,595
I saw my father shot.
I never cry untiI today.

69
00:05:09,796 --> 00:05:13,311
I got robbed yesterday,
and I know now,

70
00:05:13,396 --> 00:05:15,387
your job is the bad one.

71
00:05:15,476 --> 00:05:17,671
Yeah.

72
00:05:34,796 --> 00:05:37,469
- <i>Dudley?</i>
- Yes, good morning, Mac.

73
00:05:37,556 --> 00:05:39,148
How' it going?

74
00:05:39,236 --> 00:05:41,272
<i>It is now 9.00am.</i>

75
00:05:41,356 --> 00:05:44,428
Thanks, Mac.
Open Internet, please.

76
00:05:44,516 --> 00:05:47,747
- <i>Command unknown.</i>
- Open Internet.

77
00:05:47,836 --> 00:05:49,155
<i>Internet open.</i>

78
00:05:50,596 --> 00:05:52,985
I think I have to research
alternative specs.

79
00:05:53,076 --> 00:05:56,591
- <i>Searching alternative sex.</i>
- What? No. I didn't say that.

80
00:05:56,676 --> 00:05:59,395
<i>Granny Love dot org.</i>
<i>Want granny to take her teeth out?</i>

81
00:05:59,476 --> 00:06:01,865
- <i>Barnyard love.</i>
- Shut down.

82
00:06:02,676 --> 00:06:04,587
- I'm sorry.
- <i>Enjoy the animals.</i>

83
00:06:06,196 --> 00:06:08,630
<i>Granny's gonna spank your bottom.</i>

84
00:06:08,716 --> 00:06:10,308
<i>All kinds of fun.</i>

85
00:06:12,156 --> 00:06:13,953
I can fix that.

86
00:06:16,116 --> 00:06:17,708
Or not.

87
00:06:20,956 --> 00:06:22,435
Well, iCat...

88
00:06:23,556 --> 00:06:25,547
...looks like it' you and me.

89
00:06:35,636 --> 00:06:37,627
Larry, so what're you
trying to tell me?

90
00:06:37,716 --> 00:06:39,991
- You're broke.
- Well, how does that work?

91
00:06:40,076 --> 00:06:42,795
You've spent everything
you had then spent some more.

92
00:06:42,876 --> 00:06:45,948
- This is right here. Nothing. Zero.
- You know what?

93
00:06:46,036 --> 00:06:48,345
Maybe it' time for my wife,
the supermodel,

94
00:06:48,436 --> 00:06:50,996
to start paying for things
for once in her life.

95
00:06:51,076 --> 00:06:53,874
You're getting divorced.
Why would she pay?

96
00:06:53,956 --> 00:06:57,392
Divorced, going broke.
You think I'm falling apart, don't you?

97
00:06:57,476 --> 00:06:59,114
Not going broke. You are broke.

98
00:06:59,196 --> 00:07:01,790
- OK.
- The door' behind you.

99
00:07:01,876 --> 00:07:04,993
No, you listen to me, Toby.
You're not gonna push me around.

100
00:07:05,076 --> 00:07:07,749
We agreed on a price,
and that' the price I'll pay.

101
00:07:07,836 --> 00:07:10,509
You got it?
If you don't like it, just walk away.

102
00:07:10,596 --> 00:07:13,394
I'll tell you this, you can
kiss your business goodbye.

103
00:07:13,476 --> 00:07:17,549
If you screw with Woody Stevens,
you go down hard. You got that? What?

104
00:07:17,636 --> 00:07:19,433
No, money is not a problem.

105
00:07:19,516 --> 00:07:21,791
Don't insult me. Don't insult me!

106
00:07:21,876 --> 00:07:25,630
Money' never a problem! You have to
honour the correct price, got that?

107
00:07:25,716 --> 00:07:27,672
What?

108
00:07:30,596 --> 00:07:33,394
Well, then go home, Toby!
You make me sick!

109
00:07:33,476 --> 00:07:36,195
I can't do this many leaves
for ten bucks.

110
00:07:36,276 --> 00:07:37,345
It'll take hours!

111
00:07:37,436 --> 00:07:40,030
Should've thought of that
before you put that flyer

112
00:07:40,116 --> 00:07:42,869
on the pole saying,
"Any yard for ten bucks."

113
00:07:44,276 --> 00:07:46,073
Toby. Come on, let' talk.

114
00:07:46,156 --> 00:07:47,908
Let' talk like men, OK?

115
00:07:49,476 --> 00:07:50,670
What' the problem?

116
00:07:50,756 --> 00:07:53,953
- Money' the problem!
- Grow up, Toby!

117
00:07:55,316 --> 00:07:57,591
- I hate you.
- I hate you!

118
00:07:58,516 --> 00:08:00,188
Moron!

119
00:08:02,636 --> 00:08:06,185
- Kel, it' me.
- I'll be right down.

120
00:08:06,276 --> 00:08:08,346
Hey, Bill.

121
00:08:08,436 --> 00:08:12,873
You wanna shoot some hoops or
something before I take my ride?

122
00:08:12,956 --> 00:08:14,355
No, thanks.

123
00:08:17,236 --> 00:08:19,796
Hey, babe. How was work?

124
00:08:20,316 --> 00:08:21,510
Great.

125
00:08:21,596 --> 00:08:23,268
Good.

126
00:08:23,356 --> 00:08:26,985
Hello? Cool. I'll ask right now.
Can I play ball with Stew and his dad?

127
00:08:27,076 --> 00:08:28,828
- Of course you can.
- Cool. Thanks.

128
00:08:28,916 --> 00:08:31,510
Here, dude, I'll be right over,
OK? All right, bye.

129
00:08:31,596 --> 00:08:34,668
I just asked you if you wanted
to play ball. You said no.

130
00:08:34,756 --> 00:08:38,066
Well, yeah. I mean, Stew' dad
is awesome. He can totally dunk.

131
00:08:38,156 --> 00:08:40,465
The hoop' what?
Eight feet above the ground?

132
00:08:40,556 --> 00:08:44,469
- Anybody could dunk that.
- Well, see you guys later.

133
00:08:45,956 --> 00:08:48,550
Doug, I am so sorry.
You know, I had no idea.

134
00:08:48,636 --> 00:08:50,592
It wasn't your fault.
You didn't know.

135
00:08:50,676 --> 00:08:53,668
What do I gotta do
to relate to my son?

136
00:09:15,236 --> 00:09:16,874
Hey, guys?

137
00:09:17,236 --> 00:09:19,192
Does this sound better?

138
00:09:28,596 --> 00:09:31,793
I'm OK! I hit my butt.

139
00:10:07,916 --> 00:10:09,315
Thanks, Woody.

140
00:10:09,396 --> 00:10:11,352
I feel really safe with you.

141
00:10:11,436 --> 00:10:14,269
I noticed that. If you ever
lay your head on my back again

142
00:10:14,356 --> 00:10:17,268
when you're riding bitch,
I'll throw you in the traffic.

143
00:10:17,356 --> 00:10:19,870
I... I was just trying
to keep the wind off my face.

144
00:10:19,956 --> 00:10:23,028
- I felt you smell my neck.
- Guys, could we?

145
00:10:24,556 --> 00:10:26,467
Did you smell that man' neck?

146
00:10:26,556 --> 00:10:28,911
His cologne is fantastic.

147
00:10:28,996 --> 00:10:31,635
It' musky with an oaky finish.

148
00:10:31,716 --> 00:10:35,106
Like a lawyer cowboy.

149
00:10:35,196 --> 00:10:37,232
Lawyer cowboy?

150
00:10:38,156 --> 00:10:40,750
Wild Hogs aren't welcome here.

151
00:10:40,836 --> 00:10:41,746
Hey, Paul.

152
00:10:41,836 --> 00:10:43,064
- Hey, guys.
- Hey, Paul.

153
00:10:43,156 --> 00:10:44,305
Hey, Woody.

154
00:10:44,396 --> 00:10:46,864
Waiting on those K-ones
to do your tax returns.

155
00:10:46,956 --> 00:10:50,187
We also need to talk about that
offshore incorporating thing.

156
00:10:50,276 --> 00:10:51,868
Well, I'll give you a call.

157
00:10:51,956 --> 00:10:55,665
OK. I'll set up lunch.
Or we could do a day at the spa.

158
00:10:55,756 --> 00:10:57,553
Now that was fun.

159
00:10:59,516 --> 00:11:00,710
I don't remember that.

160
00:11:00,796 --> 00:11:04,072
- Got your wine cooler, Dad.
- Oh, sweet. Thanks.

161
00:11:04,156 --> 00:11:05,555
I'll see you Hogs in hell!

162
00:11:05,636 --> 00:11:06,785
- We'll make it.
- OK.

163
00:11:06,876 --> 00:11:09,151
That was scary.
Good work. See you later.

164
00:11:09,236 --> 00:11:12,273
- I'm not coming here anymore.
- This is a Wild Hog tradition.

165
00:11:12,356 --> 00:11:14,551
We're not Wild Hogs,
more like wild lambs.

166
00:11:14,636 --> 00:11:16,627
It' just a patch
that Doug' wife made.

167
00:11:16,716 --> 00:11:19,276
We sewed it on our jackets
so she wouldn't feel bad.

168
00:11:19,356 --> 00:11:20,835
- Is that a fact?
- Yeah.

169
00:11:20,916 --> 00:11:22,713
What has your wife ever made us?

170
00:11:22,796 --> 00:11:23,785
Hard.

171
00:11:24,076 --> 00:11:25,828
- Hey.
- That' true, she is really.

172
00:11:25,916 --> 00:11:28,669
All I'm saying is
she' good-looking.

173
00:11:28,756 --> 00:11:30,872
- Show respect.
- That' what she does.

174
00:11:30,956 --> 00:11:32,184
She' a swimsuit model.

175
00:11:32,276 --> 00:11:34,426
And it... And a good one,
I mean. She is hot.

176
00:11:34,516 --> 00:11:38,111
OK, here' a question:
What're we doing here?

177
00:11:38,196 --> 00:11:40,426
Having beers like we do every week.

178
00:11:40,516 --> 00:11:43,952
No, no. Bigger picture. Life, man.
What do we have to look forward to?

179
00:11:44,036 --> 00:11:46,425
Riding in formation
in the Labour Day Parade?

180
00:11:46,516 --> 00:11:48,586
I'm looking forward to the parade.

181
00:11:48,676 --> 00:11:50,826
I got Tootsie Rolls
I can throw to the kids.

182
00:11:50,916 --> 00:11:53,988
Tootsie Rolls that
he can throw to the kids.

183
00:11:54,076 --> 00:11:57,591
Man, you can't even put on your
turn signal without busting your ass.

184
00:11:57,676 --> 00:12:00,270
Look, let' put some
real miles on those bikes.

185
00:12:00,356 --> 00:12:03,587
- Road trip?
- Yeah. A road trip.

186
00:12:03,676 --> 00:12:07,715
Just us. No rules.
No Tootsie Rolls.

187
00:12:07,796 --> 00:12:10,310
Just us, the wind,
the road to the Pacific.

188
00:12:10,396 --> 00:12:12,466
We camp out for a week,
whenever we want,

189
00:12:12,556 --> 00:12:14,274
wherever we want.

190
00:12:14,356 --> 00:12:15,789
That' freedom, man.

191
00:12:15,876 --> 00:12:17,867
As long as we stop
at some Wi-Fi spots,

192
00:12:17,956 --> 00:12:20,026
- count me in. Yep.
- You're in? All right.

193
00:12:20,116 --> 00:12:23,108
I can't. I can't get
the time off of work.

194
00:12:23,196 --> 00:12:25,835
- You know, I'm a doctor.
- You're a dentist.

195
00:12:25,916 --> 00:12:29,192
Look, in college, man,
he'd 've been packed already.

196
00:12:29,276 --> 00:12:30,311
I'm not kidding.

197
00:12:30,396 --> 00:12:32,034
And on a bike, he' fearless.

198
00:12:32,116 --> 00:12:34,027
- He was fearless.
- Well, that was...

199
00:12:34,116 --> 00:12:36,266
This guy, we called him
the Golden Knight.

200
00:12:36,356 --> 00:12:38,506
Where' that guy?
I wanna see him again.

201
00:12:38,596 --> 00:12:40,075
That guy' married now.

202
00:12:40,156 --> 00:12:43,831
And that guy, uh, used to...
used to get high a lot.

203
00:12:43,916 --> 00:12:46,874
- What' Claudia gonna say?
- Nothing. She' in the Bahamas

204
00:12:46,956 --> 00:12:50,232
doing some swimsuit thing
for <i>Sports Illustrated.</i>

205
00:12:50,316 --> 00:12:52,034
Look, if not now, when?

206
00:12:52,116 --> 00:12:56,029
Y'all know me. I'm the first
to get buck wild. But...

207
00:12:56,116 --> 00:12:57,947
You're just afraid to ask your wife.

208
00:12:58,036 --> 00:13:00,072
- True.
- True.

209
00:13:00,156 --> 00:13:01,509
I said true!

210
00:13:01,596 --> 00:13:04,952
Come on! This is it,
on the edge, we're living!

211
00:13:05,036 --> 00:13:07,072
<i>St. Elmo's Fire, The Wild Bunch.</i>

212
00:13:07,156 --> 00:13:08,748
- <i>Deliverance!</i>
- <i>Deliverance?</i>

213
00:13:08,836 --> 00:13:10,952
- You know...
- <i>Deliverance?</i>

214
00:13:11,036 --> 00:13:12,754
<i>Deliverance.</i>

215
00:13:12,836 --> 00:13:15,509
Hey, dudes. We're gonna
ride as an American flag

216
00:13:15,596 --> 00:13:16,824
in the parade this year.

217
00:13:16,916 --> 00:13:19,111
Each guy in our chapter is a star.

218
00:13:19,196 --> 00:13:20,788
- A what?
- I'm gonna get sick.

219
00:13:20,876 --> 00:13:24,073
- Who' gonna do the stripes?
- Lyman Middle School majorettes.

220
00:13:24,156 --> 00:13:26,386
Oh, boy. Hey, we're
really living now, huh?

221
00:13:26,476 --> 00:13:28,353
Hope we don't get hit by a stray baton.

222
00:13:28,436 --> 00:13:30,233
You know what?
I'm outta here.

223
00:13:30,316 --> 00:13:32,432
I'm going with or without you guys.

224
00:13:32,516 --> 00:13:33,551
You know what I mean?

225
00:13:33,636 --> 00:13:35,388
Take your smelly tees.
Good night.

226
00:13:35,476 --> 00:13:38,593
- I said I'd go.
- Come on back.

227
00:13:38,676 --> 00:13:42,191
Oh, I almost forgot. We're also gonna
be wearing these black ribbons

228
00:13:42,276 --> 00:13:45,188
in honour of Tom Peterson.
He died last week. Boom!

229
00:13:45,276 --> 00:13:48,985
Just like that.
Anyway, he'll be missed.

230
00:13:50,596 --> 00:13:52,427
Tom Peterson. Tom Peterson.

231
00:13:52,516 --> 00:13:54,074
Do you remember that guy?

232
00:13:54,156 --> 00:13:56,431
He was our age.

233
00:14:06,596 --> 00:14:08,746
- Mom, want some gravy?
- Oh, yeah, thanks.

234
00:14:10,916 --> 00:14:13,384
- So how was your ride?
- I don't know.

235
00:14:13,476 --> 00:14:16,832
All Woody did was yap about taking
some cross-country trip.

236
00:14:16,916 --> 00:14:18,907
You wanna talk
about going on this ride?

237
00:14:18,996 --> 00:14:22,671
I can't go. I just can't walk
away from work anytime I want.

238
00:14:22,756 --> 00:14:24,826
Yeah, you know what, you're right.

239
00:14:24,916 --> 00:14:28,272
It' just as well. Road trips
probably aren't the best thing

240
00:14:28,356 --> 00:14:29,391
for a guy your age.

241
00:14:29,476 --> 00:14:31,706
I mean, it' gotta be
really inconvenient.

242
00:14:31,796 --> 00:14:35,994
Middle-aged guys having to get off their
bikes every 20 minutes to take a pee...

243
00:14:36,076 --> 00:14:39,148
What kind of crack is that?
What' wrong with my age?

244
00:14:39,236 --> 00:14:41,227
She talks like I'm not right here.

245
00:14:41,316 --> 00:14:42,874
Doug, I'm joking.

246
00:14:42,956 --> 00:14:44,309
No, you know what I think?

247
00:14:44,396 --> 00:14:46,227
I think you think I'm a boring guy.

248
00:14:46,316 --> 00:14:48,307
I'm old and boring.
I've become lame.

249
00:14:48,396 --> 00:14:50,751
Everybody thinks that
at this table. I'm lame!

250
00:14:50,836 --> 00:14:53,304
- I'm lame! Admit it!
- Doug, calm down. It' OK.

251
00:14:53,396 --> 00:14:55,751
I'm not gonna calm down.
You know what I think?

252
00:14:55,836 --> 00:14:58,475
"Calming down" means is
another word for "lame!"

253
00:14:58,556 --> 00:15:01,992
And I'm not lame!
You know, I'm wild and free!

254
00:15:02,076 --> 00:15:03,953
Wild and free and a man, yeah!

255
00:15:04,036 --> 00:15:06,948
A man that likes to eat meat.
I'm tired of not eating meat!

256
00:15:07,036 --> 00:15:09,186
Meat' good! Good for men.

257
00:15:09,276 --> 00:15:12,825
And potatoes. I like
potatoes and I like gravy

258
00:15:12,916 --> 00:15:16,352
on my potatoes. Yum, yum!

259
00:15:20,356 --> 00:15:23,951
- Don't make sudden moves.
- I'm living wild. It feels good, baby!

260
00:15:24,036 --> 00:15:25,355
No, no, Dad. Your LDL.

261
00:15:25,436 --> 00:15:26,994
Butt out, LDLs! I miss butter.

262
00:15:27,076 --> 00:15:28,429
You know why I miss butter?

263
00:15:28,516 --> 00:15:32,555
The French think butter is like cheese,
they eat it, they eat it just like this.

264
00:15:32,636 --> 00:15:33,785
Right off the stick.

265
00:15:33,876 --> 00:15:37,551
And the French, who've never won
a major battle, they know how to eat!

266
00:15:37,636 --> 00:15:40,389
And I... I am living,

267
00:15:40,476 --> 00:15:42,148
and it feels great!

268
00:15:49,956 --> 00:15:51,025
Doug, are you OK?

269
00:15:53,396 --> 00:15:54,715
You OK?

270
00:15:54,796 --> 00:15:57,264
- Yeah! I'm all right...
- Dad, just spit it out!

271
00:15:57,356 --> 00:15:58,869
Spit it out! Come on.

272
00:15:58,956 --> 00:16:00,708
- Breathe.
- I am not all right.

273
00:16:03,516 --> 00:16:06,030
- Well, Mr Madsen...
- Dr Madsen...

274
00:16:06,116 --> 00:16:09,347
Oh, really? Great. Then I can
put this a little more simply.

275
00:16:09,436 --> 00:16:13,793
You had a catecholamine-induced,
super-ventricular tachyarrhythmia.

276
00:16:13,876 --> 00:16:17,425
I'm actually a dentist, so I
have no idea what you just said.

277
00:16:17,516 --> 00:16:20,155
- Stress-induced panic attack.
- I'm not stressed.

278
00:16:20,236 --> 00:16:23,148
Your body says otherwise.
We see this a lot in middle-age.

279
00:16:23,236 --> 00:16:26,114
- I'm not middle-aged.
- We hear that a lot, too.

280
00:16:26,196 --> 00:16:28,585
How 'bout we get you out of
here in a few minutes?

281
00:16:28,676 --> 00:16:30,871
<i>Dr Wesley to imaging.</i>
<i>Dr Wesley to imaging.</i>

282
00:16:30,956 --> 00:16:32,674
I am a middle-aged man, aren't I?

283
00:16:32,756 --> 00:16:34,508
Only mathematically.

284
00:16:36,236 --> 00:16:38,670
I think you need to let off some steam.

285
00:16:38,756 --> 00:16:42,635
You used to love to travel.
No, Doug, you used to play hockey.

286
00:16:42,716 --> 00:16:45,435
You were crazy. You don't
sing annoying '80s music.

287
00:16:45,516 --> 00:16:46,665
It' different now.

288
00:16:46,756 --> 00:16:50,066
You know, I had to slow down
for... for you and Billy.

289
00:16:50,156 --> 00:16:51,953
So I'm the one who did this to you?

290
00:16:52,036 --> 00:16:55,915
I'm in a hospital. It' easier for me
to blame other people for my problems.

291
00:16:55,996 --> 00:17:00,069
I think you should go on that trip.

292
00:17:00,156 --> 00:17:03,114
If you don't, I will fire up
the hog and go with the guys.

293
00:17:03,196 --> 00:17:05,505
- Woody doesn't have a plan.
- He never does.

294
00:17:05,596 --> 00:17:07,791
It' like taking a trip to nowhere.

295
00:17:07,876 --> 00:17:11,232
Maybe that' exactly what you need.

296
00:17:16,716 --> 00:17:18,866
What up?

297
00:17:18,956 --> 00:17:22,869
Hey. You're late! Supposed
to be here at 8.30, guys.

298
00:17:22,956 --> 00:17:25,789
Hey, look here, if Karen calls,

299
00:17:25,876 --> 00:17:30,188
OK, I'm at a toilet bowl seminar
in Cleveland.

300
00:17:31,836 --> 00:17:33,986
I'm serious. I need y'all
to cover for me.

301
00:17:34,076 --> 00:17:36,112
Yeah, sure.

302
00:17:37,076 --> 00:17:39,795
What? What?
What are you looking at?

303
00:17:39,876 --> 00:17:40,945
I got a tat.

304
00:17:41,036 --> 00:17:42,708
- Come on!
- Hell just froze over.

305
00:17:42,796 --> 00:17:45,026
- Let' see it!
- I'm a biker, dude!

306
00:17:45,116 --> 00:17:46,629
I got a tat!

307
00:17:46,716 --> 00:17:49,549
- It' an apple.
- Dudley, you know...

308
00:17:49,636 --> 00:17:52,833
I know: Trademarked.
But what are they gonna say?

309
00:17:52,916 --> 00:17:54,747
Lt' in my skin, bitch!

310
00:17:57,556 --> 00:18:00,866
- You guys aren't gonna wear helmets?
- I don't wanna wear a helmet.

311
00:18:00,956 --> 00:18:03,311
I don't want anything
between me and the road.

312
00:18:03,396 --> 00:18:05,034
You will if your head falls on it.

313
00:18:05,116 --> 00:18:07,186
62 percent of all motorcycle fatalities

314
00:18:07,276 --> 00:18:09,665
can be prevented
with an approved DOT helmet.

315
00:18:09,756 --> 00:18:12,634
What' that leather condom
gonna protect you from?

316
00:18:12,716 --> 00:18:15,389
Snoopy? The Red Baron?
How about dating?

317
00:18:15,476 --> 00:18:19,230
- You told me you liked it.
- There are no rules on this trip.

318
00:18:19,316 --> 00:18:22,149
We're heading for the Pacific,
and there ain't no plans.

319
00:18:22,236 --> 00:18:26,434
Well, we got a week to do this. I figure
we gotta be in lllinois by tonight.

320
00:18:26,516 --> 00:18:28,950
The way I mapped it out,
we should be a 100 miles

321
00:18:29,036 --> 00:18:31,152
- past St. Louis by sundown.
- Good.

322
00:18:31,236 --> 00:18:33,670
What did I say?
I said it' the open road, OK?

323
00:18:33,756 --> 00:18:36,554
- Who knows where we're gonna be?
- I know where.

324
00:18:36,636 --> 00:18:39,196
Dudley hooked me up.
Check out this thing.

325
00:18:39,276 --> 00:18:40,914
It' a GPS in my phone now.

326
00:18:40,996 --> 00:18:42,668
- Look.
- No kidding? Let me see.

327
00:18:42,756 --> 00:18:44,872
- Cool!
- What are you?

328
00:18:44,956 --> 00:18:46,674
Numbnuts, what'd you do that for?

329
00:18:46,756 --> 00:18:50,226
For the good of the trip. You don't need
a GPS to discover America.

330
00:18:50,316 --> 00:18:52,352
You need a bike and
you need the road, OK?

331
00:18:52,436 --> 00:18:55,109
Freedom. If we have an emergency,
I got a cell phone.

332
00:18:55,196 --> 00:18:56,345
- No, you don't.
- What?

333
00:18:56,436 --> 00:18:59,712
Hey! Why did you do that?
I got all my data in there!

334
00:18:59,796 --> 00:19:01,912
Well, how does that feel, Woody?

335
00:19:03,036 --> 00:19:04,151
Feels good.

336
00:19:08,116 --> 00:19:09,549
- No cell phones!
- Wait.

337
00:19:09,636 --> 00:19:11,945
- Come on, get rid of it.
- Doug, he' right.

338
00:19:12,036 --> 00:19:14,186
No, no, wait, wait...

339
00:19:14,276 --> 00:19:17,109
Yeah! Yeah, Wild Hogs,
baby! Wild Hogs!

340
00:19:17,196 --> 00:19:19,312
You did that so Karen wouldn't call you.

341
00:19:19,396 --> 00:19:20,715
- Exactly.
- Give it up.

342
00:19:20,796 --> 00:19:24,505
We're not gonna discuss this? We're
not even gonna think about this? No!

343
00:19:24,596 --> 00:19:26,826
- We need one phone.
- Freedom, baby!

344
00:19:30,956 --> 00:19:31,991
We gotta go.

345
00:19:33,396 --> 00:19:35,432
- Go, go!
- Come back here!

346
00:20:03,716 --> 00:20:05,468
Where're you guys headed?

347
00:20:07,236 --> 00:20:08,794
I love you!

348
00:20:10,596 --> 00:20:12,587
You're hot!

349
00:20:31,516 --> 00:20:33,984
- Losers.
- Look at these guys.

350
00:20:34,596 --> 00:20:36,905
Hey.

351
00:20:38,356 --> 00:20:40,665
You guys want a ride?

352
00:20:44,036 --> 00:20:46,630
Well, all right.
Sleeping bags are all set.

353
00:20:49,556 --> 00:20:52,548
Bobby, I got two words
for you: Foot pump.

354
00:20:52,636 --> 00:20:56,185
Woody, I got four words for you:
Got a cheap-ass wife.

355
00:20:57,476 --> 00:21:00,149
Hey, guys, this is poop.

356
00:21:00,236 --> 00:21:01,464
- So don't eat it.
- God.

357
00:21:01,556 --> 00:21:04,275
Excuse me, Mr Hard Drive,
you're supposed to bury it,

358
00:21:04,356 --> 00:21:05,345
not put it in a bag.

359
00:21:05,436 --> 00:21:07,950
This is plastic, I'm not
gonna put it in the earth.

360
00:21:08,036 --> 00:21:09,867
I'll find a garbage can tomorrow.

361
00:21:11,636 --> 00:21:13,706
So you gonna sit right next to me

362
00:21:13,796 --> 00:21:15,275
with that doo-doo.

363
00:21:17,156 --> 00:21:19,795
Hey, come on. Doesn't
get any better than this.

364
00:21:19,876 --> 00:21:23,630
Sitting around a fire,
chilling with your friends, relaxing...

365
00:21:23,716 --> 00:21:27,504
Sorry, you gotta bury that thing.
Otherwise I'll vomit in your lap.

366
00:21:27,596 --> 00:21:30,190
...each other' company.
- I'll hang it from a tree

367
00:21:30,276 --> 00:21:31,391
so bears don't get it.

368
00:21:31,476 --> 00:21:33,831
- No, don't hang it in a tree!
- Why not?

369
00:21:33,916 --> 00:21:36,271
'Cause bears don't eat shit!

370
00:21:42,676 --> 00:21:43,904
What' up?

371
00:21:45,396 --> 00:21:47,990
Ever wake up and wonder
what happened to your life?

372
00:21:49,196 --> 00:21:50,754
I really had such great plans.

373
00:21:50,836 --> 00:21:54,192
My life and my work would be
an adventure. You know?

374
00:21:54,276 --> 00:21:56,426
All of a sudden
I'm a suburban dentist.

375
00:21:56,516 --> 00:22:01,146
Hey, look, Doug, I feel your pain, man.
I swore I would never return to a job

376
00:22:01,236 --> 00:22:04,273
where I had to wear
condoms on my shoes.

377
00:22:04,356 --> 00:22:06,108
- You're still at The Firm?
- Yeah.

378
00:22:06,196 --> 00:22:09,347
And I get yelled at
by an ungrateful wife all night.

379
00:22:09,436 --> 00:22:12,269
- The whole thing has made me...
- A wimp.

380
00:22:12,356 --> 00:22:15,712
I was gonna say miserable.
You think I'm a wimp?

381
00:22:15,796 --> 00:22:18,515
I thought you were gonna say wimp,
so I filled it in.

382
00:22:18,596 --> 00:22:21,190
You're a wimp, Bobby.
I... I'll say it.

383
00:22:21,276 --> 00:22:24,393
I mean, you're afraid of women.
It' kind of embarrassing.

384
00:22:24,476 --> 00:22:27,149
- I'm afraid of women.
- Afraid to talk to women.

385
00:22:27,236 --> 00:22:30,034
Bobby' afraid they'll
kill him in his sleep.

386
00:22:30,916 --> 00:22:33,988
Wow. Now I'm really
afraid of women.

387
00:22:34,076 --> 00:22:36,192
At least one of us
is living the fairy tale.

388
00:22:36,276 --> 00:22:38,744
Right? Plenty of money,
you travel all the time,

389
00:22:38,836 --> 00:22:42,385
you got the swimsuit model for a wife.
At least one of us has got it made.

390
00:22:42,476 --> 00:22:45,548
Yeah, Well, one man' fairy tale
is another man' nightmare.

391
00:22:47,476 --> 00:22:50,548
You think that the
marshmallow' done, Doug?

392
00:22:50,636 --> 00:22:53,469
Hey, look at that. Anybody
want the first marshmallow?

393
00:22:53,556 --> 00:22:56,275
Starting to look like Dudley' helmet.

394
00:22:58,236 --> 00:22:59,191
All right.

395
00:23:00,796 --> 00:23:03,594
- I think I'm halfway there.
- Oh, in only one hour?

396
00:23:03,676 --> 00:23:05,394
Bobby, you sure
you wanna do that?

397
00:23:05,476 --> 00:23:08,354
You could use one of the spare
bags we got in the... tent!

398
00:23:08,436 --> 00:23:10,745
Hey, Dudley, go get
the water jug out of my bag!

399
00:23:10,836 --> 00:23:12,667
Kick, kick, kick, kick! Dirt!

400
00:23:12,756 --> 00:23:13,791
I got it!

401
00:23:13,876 --> 00:23:15,912
That' camp-stove fuel!

402
00:23:18,116 --> 00:23:21,552
- No!
- This is the wrong jug!

403
00:23:21,636 --> 00:23:22,910
You think?

404
00:23:24,116 --> 00:23:25,026
Aw, God.

405
00:23:25,116 --> 00:23:26,868
Supposed to be flame-retardant.

406
00:23:26,956 --> 00:23:28,867
I guess it wasn't Dudley-retardant.

407
00:23:31,196 --> 00:23:33,471
All my drawers are burning.

408
00:23:35,356 --> 00:23:36,914
Oh, perfect!

409
00:23:51,396 --> 00:23:52,545
What are you doing?

410
00:23:52,636 --> 00:23:54,752
Huh? Keeping my face
out of the wind.

411
00:23:56,076 --> 00:24:00,547
Hey. Oh. Boy, my ass is sore.

412
00:24:00,636 --> 00:24:02,388
Mine too.

413
00:24:02,476 --> 00:24:05,309
It' Woody' fault
for riding us so hard yesterday.

414
00:24:05,396 --> 00:24:09,025
The human body wasn't made to straddle
something that big for that long.

415
00:24:09,116 --> 00:24:11,346
Well, you know, it'
gonna hurt a little bit.

416
00:24:11,436 --> 00:24:15,065
That' all part of the experience.
That' why we didn't bring our wives.

417
00:24:15,156 --> 00:24:17,306
What the? What the hell?

418
00:24:17,396 --> 00:24:20,866
Somebody wanna explain to me
why I'm the one in the dirt...

419
00:24:20,956 --> 00:24:24,835
...when I got sore jaws
from three hours of blowing...

420
00:24:25,396 --> 00:24:30,345
Please, please for the love
of God, finish your sentence.

421
00:24:34,116 --> 00:24:35,834
See, what...

422
00:24:35,916 --> 00:24:37,634
What exactly do we have here?

423
00:24:37,716 --> 00:24:38,865
We've got...

424
00:24:38,956 --> 00:24:43,393
...one, two, three men
in a bed... spooning?

425
00:24:43,476 --> 00:24:44,989
This is not what it looks like.

426
00:24:45,076 --> 00:24:47,510
This is... What is it, Woody?

427
00:24:47,596 --> 00:24:48,915
Camping.

428
00:24:48,996 --> 00:24:51,749
I'll tell you exactly what it is there,
Poindexter.

429
00:24:51,836 --> 00:24:55,909
It is four counts of indecent
exposure, two counts of lewd,

430
00:24:55,996 --> 00:24:57,907
lascivious behaviour, and...

431
00:24:58,796 --> 00:25:02,266
...one count of pure jealousy.

432
00:25:03,356 --> 00:25:05,665
How you doing?

433
00:25:05,756 --> 00:25:07,155
- Hey, look.
- We're not...

434
00:25:07,236 --> 00:25:09,067
Thanks for waking us up, officer.

435
00:25:09,156 --> 00:25:12,626
- Oh, it was actually...
- I get it. You gotta get going.

436
00:25:12,716 --> 00:25:15,913
Terrific. Five' a crowd?
Is that what I'm gleaning here?

437
00:25:15,996 --> 00:25:19,227
Yeah, five' uneven number.
Figure it out.

438
00:25:19,316 --> 00:25:21,671
You guys can't see it, can you?
Too close.

439
00:25:21,756 --> 00:25:25,112
You don't realise how lucky
you are to have each other.

440
00:25:25,196 --> 00:25:29,075
Oh, daddy... Damn lucky.

441
00:25:30,836 --> 00:25:33,509
- I've always felt so.
- I know what you've felt.

442
00:25:33,596 --> 00:25:35,791
I have too.

443
00:25:47,716 --> 00:25:50,594
- You wearing pants?
- No.

444
00:25:50,676 --> 00:25:53,236
Would you please put some
pants on, for God' sake!

445
00:25:53,316 --> 00:25:54,874
Dudley!

446
00:25:54,956 --> 00:25:56,275
What a nice guy.

447
00:25:58,316 --> 00:26:00,955
Oh, yeah.

448
00:26:01,916 --> 00:26:03,827
Anybody else gotta take a leak?

449
00:26:03,916 --> 00:26:05,031
- No.
- No.

450
00:26:05,116 --> 00:26:07,186
Hey, guys, last stop for quite a while.

451
00:26:07,276 --> 00:26:10,507
I gotta pee again now.

452
00:26:56,796 --> 00:26:59,833
Wow, I can smell them from here.

453
00:26:59,916 --> 00:27:03,386
Gentlemen, that' the real deal.

454
00:27:35,556 --> 00:27:37,069
What?

455
00:27:39,516 --> 00:27:42,713
That' wild!

456
00:28:03,836 --> 00:28:05,827
Oh! Whoa, stop it!

457
00:28:05,916 --> 00:28:07,827
Biker in trouble!

458
00:28:27,676 --> 00:28:29,314
This is awesome!

459
00:28:32,076 --> 00:28:34,590
Thanks for waiting for me, jerks!

460
00:28:38,396 --> 00:28:40,910
Oh, it'... Whoa, it' cold!

461
00:28:42,156 --> 00:28:44,670
- What?
- Why are you naked?

462
00:28:44,756 --> 00:28:47,270
We're swimming.
Did you keep your skiwies on?

463
00:28:47,356 --> 00:28:49,551
There could be snapping turtles.

464
00:28:49,636 --> 00:28:52,628
I kept mine on 'cause I didn't
want it to get dark in here.

465
00:28:52,716 --> 00:28:55,435
I thought we were
doing this wild and free thing.

466
00:28:55,516 --> 00:28:56,631
Yeah, well...

467
00:28:58,396 --> 00:29:00,751
More like, old and lame, isn't it?

468
00:29:00,836 --> 00:29:03,509
The high guy would've
just ripped 'em right off,

469
00:29:03,596 --> 00:29:05,666
back in the... back in the day.

470
00:29:05,756 --> 00:29:08,873
- But the day' today, isn't it?
- This isn't necessary.

471
00:29:08,956 --> 00:29:12,505
Yeah, come on. Come on! Huh?

472
00:29:14,036 --> 00:29:17,506
You see what you started?
You even got Doug out of his drawers.

473
00:29:17,596 --> 00:29:20,793
What the hell, you know?
But everybody keep their distance.

474
00:29:20,876 --> 00:29:23,948
I don't want the whole size
thing to ruin our friendship.

475
00:29:24,036 --> 00:29:26,914
Launching mine.
Over your head, baby.

476
00:29:26,996 --> 00:29:28,907
You guys are nuts.

477
00:29:33,996 --> 00:29:35,714
Come on! Huh?

478
00:29:35,796 --> 00:29:40,233
Fine. I will get naked
with my gay friends,

479
00:29:40,316 --> 00:29:43,513
and if any of them look
at my junk, I will kill them.

480
00:29:46,716 --> 00:29:48,991
Gentlemen, these are
the good old days.

481
00:29:56,516 --> 00:29:58,746
Come on, kids! Come on!

482
00:29:59,556 --> 00:30:00,955
Oh, no.

483
00:30:01,036 --> 00:30:04,346
- Last one in smells like Uncle Eddie!
- Oh, hell no.

484
00:30:04,436 --> 00:30:07,587
Hope you guys don't mind company.
Minivan was getting cloudy.

485
00:30:07,676 --> 00:30:11,749
There' a much shallower creek
for kids up the canyon a bit.

486
00:30:11,836 --> 00:30:14,828
Oh, no, my kids like to dive.
Marky, show this guy your dive.

487
00:30:14,916 --> 00:30:18,033
If you put your arms out,
he does a backflip right into them.

488
00:30:18,116 --> 00:30:19,913
Don't do that, it' not a good idea.

489
00:30:19,996 --> 00:30:21,270
Oh, hello.

490
00:30:21,356 --> 00:30:23,233
You gentlemen like potato salad?

491
00:30:23,316 --> 00:30:24,385
We've got extra.

492
00:30:24,476 --> 00:30:26,671
But you may wanna
eat that way over there.

493
00:30:26,756 --> 00:30:28,712
Less ants and snakes.

494
00:30:28,796 --> 00:30:30,468
The kids are coming.

495
00:30:30,556 --> 00:30:32,592
No. Whoa. Guys,
you can't swim here.

496
00:30:32,676 --> 00:30:34,985
Big crawfish, they're snapping...

497
00:30:35,076 --> 00:30:36,509
Crawfish!

498
00:30:36,596 --> 00:30:38,109
Let me see if I can catch one!

499
00:30:39,076 --> 00:30:41,271
You see? He' looking for crawfish!

500
00:30:41,356 --> 00:30:43,153
He' gonna find a couple!

501
00:30:43,236 --> 00:30:44,555
Where is he?

502
00:30:49,276 --> 00:30:51,426
Marky! Cooper! Ava!

503
00:30:51,516 --> 00:30:53,347
Let'... let' get out of the water.

504
00:30:53,436 --> 00:30:55,313
- Find a new spot.
- Why, Hugh?

505
00:30:55,396 --> 00:30:57,193
This is such a nice...

506
00:30:58,196 --> 00:31:00,187
Oh, my God.

507
00:31:00,276 --> 00:31:02,949
- I didn't wanna do this.
- Out of the water! Now!

508
00:31:03,036 --> 00:31:04,264
Listen to your dad.

509
00:31:04,356 --> 00:31:06,187
- No!
- We just got here!

510
00:31:06,276 --> 00:31:08,949
Get out of the damn water, now!
Run! Run! Run! Go!

511
00:31:09,036 --> 00:31:11,596
Take it. Take it!
What' wrong with these people?

512
00:31:11,676 --> 00:31:12,665
Come on, go!

513
00:31:12,756 --> 00:31:15,316
I'll bet her potato salad
was really good.

514
00:31:17,556 --> 00:31:19,467
- Maybe we should go.
- Yeah, let' go.

515
00:31:19,556 --> 00:31:21,035
Why? They ain't coming back!

516
00:31:22,996 --> 00:31:26,147
Fellas! Forget about them!

517
00:31:26,236 --> 00:31:29,114
More room for us, huh? Come on!

518
00:31:30,236 --> 00:31:32,909
You like what you see?
Huh? Let' get involved!

519
00:31:40,236 --> 00:31:42,352
Now that' what I'm talking about!

520
00:31:43,836 --> 00:31:47,033
I saw your bikes over there and I...

521
00:31:48,756 --> 00:31:50,587
Chicken fights, fellas?

522
00:31:51,676 --> 00:31:53,985
No? Plan B...

523
00:31:55,196 --> 00:31:57,266
- Marco...
- Polo.

524
00:31:57,356 --> 00:32:00,109
Marco...

525
00:32:00,196 --> 00:32:03,825
Marco... Marco!

526
00:32:29,076 --> 00:32:30,668
Thank you so much!

527
00:32:30,756 --> 00:32:34,226
And I left a window open, all right?

528
00:33:11,076 --> 00:33:13,954
Oh, yeah. Now, this is a biker bar.

529
00:33:14,036 --> 00:33:16,425
I'm buying, let' go.

530
00:33:18,476 --> 00:33:21,548
I hope they have bran muffins.
I'm a little bound up.

531
00:33:26,836 --> 00:33:28,952
My damn leg' asleep!

532
00:33:29,036 --> 00:33:30,913
Lt' got an emblem too.
An FLH emblem.

533
00:33:30,996 --> 00:33:32,827
That is rare, man. Rare.

534
00:33:32,916 --> 00:33:35,714
- Can you see this?
- Oh, man. That' beautiful.

535
00:33:36,756 --> 00:33:38,951
- What' wrong with you?
- Legs are asleep.

536
00:33:51,556 --> 00:33:53,069
How 'bout this one?

537
00:33:53,156 --> 00:33:55,590
Yeah.

538
00:33:56,996 --> 00:33:58,395
You guys want beers?

539
00:33:58,476 --> 00:34:01,513
I gotta find that guy with
the '55 bike, man. It is beautiful.

540
00:34:02,756 --> 00:34:06,385
Nice tat. Where'd you get it?

541
00:34:06,476 --> 00:34:09,434
Leavenworth. You?

542
00:34:09,516 --> 00:34:11,507
Meadow Hills Galleria.

543
00:34:17,876 --> 00:34:21,471
I don't think I've ever seen
you guys around here before.

544
00:34:21,556 --> 00:34:23,035
What' your?

545
00:34:23,116 --> 00:34:25,346
- Hey, hey, hey, hey.
- Wild Hogs.

546
00:34:25,436 --> 00:34:27,188
That the name of your little gang?

547
00:34:27,276 --> 00:34:30,427
Not a gang. We're friends
riding from Cincinnati to the coast.

548
00:34:30,516 --> 00:34:32,586
Hey, man. We in your seats?

549
00:34:32,676 --> 00:34:34,507
- No.
- No, 'cause we could just...

550
00:34:34,596 --> 00:34:37,064
No. No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

551
00:34:37,156 --> 00:34:41,069
- We'll roll out.
- No. No. I insist. Sit.

552
00:34:41,156 --> 00:34:42,430
- Sit?
- Sit. I insist.

553
00:34:42,516 --> 00:34:44,871
I think I'm gonna join you fellas.

554
00:34:44,956 --> 00:34:46,753
Actually, we have a...

555
00:34:46,836 --> 00:34:48,508
Yeah, let' join them.

556
00:34:48,596 --> 00:34:52,384
Make ourselves some nice
new little friends.

557
00:34:52,476 --> 00:34:53,875
- Nice patch.
- Yeah.

558
00:34:53,956 --> 00:34:56,595
You get your grandmother
to needlepoint that?

559
00:34:56,676 --> 00:34:59,509
Well, what' going on
with you there, Cochise?

560
00:34:59,596 --> 00:35:01,427
What' your story?

561
00:35:08,676 --> 00:35:11,110
Wh... What is that
supposed to be? Is he blind?

562
00:35:11,196 --> 00:35:12,834
He wasn't when he walked in here.

563
00:35:12,916 --> 00:35:14,474
Hey! I'm talking to you!

564
00:35:14,556 --> 00:35:16,911
- You hear me?
- He can hear fine.

565
00:35:16,996 --> 00:35:19,351
Look, we're...
We don't want any trouble.

566
00:35:21,276 --> 00:35:22,629
I do.

567
00:35:22,716 --> 00:35:26,675
Actually, that' what
I'm looking forward to the most.

568
00:35:26,756 --> 00:35:30,635
That' what he' looking forward to!

569
00:35:30,716 --> 00:35:32,752
I heard him say that. I heard him.

570
00:35:35,356 --> 00:35:36,391
Shut up.

571
00:35:39,196 --> 00:35:41,152
All right.

572
00:35:41,236 --> 00:35:43,625
You're looking for trouble?

573
00:35:45,916 --> 00:35:49,545
You gotta be careful about Bobby here.
His temper' like a Roman candle.

574
00:35:49,636 --> 00:35:52,196
Man... That' a damn lie!

575
00:35:52,276 --> 00:35:54,551
On the other hand,
Woody over here,

576
00:35:54,636 --> 00:35:57,196
you get him mad,
people get broke.

577
00:35:58,596 --> 00:36:00,154
Doug makes kids cry.

578
00:36:00,236 --> 00:36:02,955
- What?
- Yeah. You make kids cry.

579
00:36:03,036 --> 00:36:04,151
You made my child cry.

580
00:36:04,236 --> 00:36:06,306
Your kid was crying
before she got to me.

581
00:36:06,396 --> 00:36:08,830
Oh, yeah. But I asked you
to give her a lollipop.

582
00:36:08,916 --> 00:36:10,872
- It calms her.
- You can't give a...

583
00:36:10,956 --> 00:36:12,992
- All right, shut up!
- You know what?

584
00:36:13,076 --> 00:36:15,112
I think we better get out of here.

585
00:36:15,196 --> 00:36:17,710
No. We'll get out of here at sundown.

586
00:36:17,796 --> 00:36:19,548
After we've had our beverage.

587
00:36:19,636 --> 00:36:22,025
Sundown, hoss? What?

588
00:36:22,116 --> 00:36:27,144
These are on me. You got
the mocha lattes yesterday.

589
00:36:27,596 --> 00:36:28,824
Hey, brother.

590
00:36:30,756 --> 00:36:33,350
- Another Wild Hog!
- Yep.

591
00:36:33,436 --> 00:36:36,314
Yep-er-oonie. That' our gang.

592
00:36:36,396 --> 00:36:40,435
Hey, who owns that
'48 Panhead outside?

593
00:36:40,516 --> 00:36:42,029
That' my '48.

594
00:36:42,116 --> 00:36:44,107
Sweet ride.

595
00:36:44,196 --> 00:36:47,905
And I'm sick of it. How 'bout
a trade there, brother?

596
00:36:47,996 --> 00:36:50,351
- Dudley. Dudley, Dudley.
- Oh, I wish.

597
00:36:50,436 --> 00:36:52,825
I'm on a Sportster.
It' worth half of yours.

598
00:36:52,916 --> 00:36:56,875
A Sportster? I grew up on a Sportster!
I've been wanting another Sportster!

599
00:36:56,956 --> 00:36:59,345
No, no, no. It' even better than that.

600
00:36:59,436 --> 00:37:01,233
In the gas tank is one of my laces.

601
00:37:01,316 --> 00:37:04,467
I dropped it in when I was trying
to get my calculator watch out.

602
00:37:05,596 --> 00:37:07,029
- Dudley?
- Dudley.

603
00:37:07,116 --> 00:37:09,186
Dudley... you got a deal.

604
00:37:09,276 --> 00:37:10,675
Seriously?

605
00:37:10,756 --> 00:37:12,792
Think about it.
He won't trade the bike.

606
00:37:12,876 --> 00:37:14,912
I wanna see what you look like on that.

607
00:37:14,996 --> 00:37:16,634
You're on.

608
00:37:16,716 --> 00:37:19,071
Dudley! Dudley, no. No, wait a minute.

609
00:37:19,156 --> 00:37:20,635
We gotta trade...

610
00:37:20,716 --> 00:37:22,229
Yo, check this out.

611
00:37:22,316 --> 00:37:25,114
Does anybody else get
that pre-rape feeling?

612
00:37:25,196 --> 00:37:26,515
I do.

613
00:37:31,676 --> 00:37:33,951
Oh, oh, this is great!

614
00:37:34,036 --> 00:37:36,266
No, no, no, no, no.
This is Joker' Panhead.

615
00:37:36,356 --> 00:37:40,031
- I thought we were talking about this.
- Hey, your Panhead is over here.

616
00:37:40,116 --> 00:37:41,868
Oh. I was talking about...

617
00:37:41,956 --> 00:37:44,550
No, no, no, no, no.
I got a better one for you.

618
00:37:44,636 --> 00:37:47,946
It' right over here.
The red one, the Panhead.

619
00:37:48,036 --> 00:37:49,105
- Where?
- There.

620
00:37:49,196 --> 00:37:51,664
That' a Panhead.
There're no other Panheads.

621
00:37:51,756 --> 00:37:52,905
- That?
- Yeah.

622
00:37:52,996 --> 00:37:54,588
That' a pile of junk.

623
00:37:54,676 --> 00:37:57,190
Yeah. That' your pile of junk.

624
00:38:02,116 --> 00:38:04,391
- This guy' joking.
- Wanna know the joke?

625
00:38:04,476 --> 00:38:08,310
Lt' suburban assholes who buy leather
outfits who think they're bikers.

626
00:38:08,396 --> 00:38:10,352
And it' a joke that I'm damn sick of.

627
00:38:10,436 --> 00:38:13,030
You wanna know who
a real biker is? Damien Blade.

628
00:38:13,116 --> 00:38:15,835
He founded the Del Fuegos
and he built this bar

629
00:38:15,916 --> 00:38:18,032
for real bikers, not this!

630
00:38:18,116 --> 00:38:19,469
We've a right to be bikers.

631
00:38:19,556 --> 00:38:22,150
You don't have rights.
Shut up! I knew you assholes

632
00:38:22,236 --> 00:38:24,830
the minute I laid eyes on you.
Look at the four of you.

633
00:38:24,916 --> 00:38:27,191
- You don't know us.
- You don't think I do?

634
00:38:27,276 --> 00:38:31,906
What? You're probably a podiatrist
or an ear-nose-and-throat specialist.

635
00:38:31,996 --> 00:38:33,793
- I wish.
- Orthodontist?

636
00:38:33,876 --> 00:38:36,470
Close enough.

637
00:38:36,556 --> 00:38:39,024
And you, Bobby,
guaranteed you're henpecked.

638
00:38:39,116 --> 00:38:41,789
- Right? Your wife wears the pants.
- You know my wife?

639
00:38:41,876 --> 00:38:44,310
And you, you anal-retentive wimp,

640
00:38:44,396 --> 00:38:46,626
guarantee you bag your own shit.

641
00:38:46,716 --> 00:38:48,388
Wow, you're good.

642
00:38:48,476 --> 00:38:50,785
- What colour am I thinking of?
- Shut up.

643
00:38:52,116 --> 00:38:56,029
You're the biggest poser
of them all, aren't you, squinty?

644
00:38:56,916 --> 00:38:59,476
Go home. Just go home. Go home.

645
00:38:59,556 --> 00:39:01,672
You couldn't handle
this freedom anyhow.

646
00:39:01,756 --> 00:39:04,031
Get out. Go back
to your safe little lives.

647
00:39:04,116 --> 00:39:05,868
Let' get our bikes. We'll get out.

648
00:39:05,956 --> 00:39:08,675
You're not listening.
I'm taking your friend' bike

649
00:39:08,756 --> 00:39:10,872
and you are gonna
hit the road and go back to

650
00:39:10,956 --> 00:39:13,516
wherever the hell it is
that you came from.

651
00:39:13,596 --> 00:39:15,587
We're gonna have to
work something out.

652
00:39:15,676 --> 00:39:19,112
All right. Let' work something out.

653
00:39:33,276 --> 00:39:36,188
Hey! What' going on?
Something break?

654
00:39:36,276 --> 00:39:38,995
- What' up, man? What' up?
- This is bullshit, man.

655
00:39:39,076 --> 00:39:41,306
We should go back
and get Dudley' bike.

656
00:39:41,396 --> 00:39:43,432
That' why we're stopping?
You nuts?

657
00:39:43,516 --> 00:39:46,826
We'll call the police.
I gotta borrow somebody' cell phone.

658
00:39:46,916 --> 00:39:48,872
Einstein had us throw ours away.

659
00:39:48,956 --> 00:39:50,708
Hey, look, man, damn the bike.

660
00:39:50,796 --> 00:39:52,912
He' gonna have to roll
with that sidecar.

661
00:39:52,996 --> 00:39:55,066
- Right.
- Let' get up outta here, man.

662
00:39:55,156 --> 00:39:58,592
The trip is over 'cause
some tattooed bullies pushed us around?

663
00:39:58,676 --> 00:39:59,791
- Yeah.
- Yeah.

664
00:40:01,196 --> 00:40:02,106
I go where you go.

665
00:40:02,196 --> 00:40:03,868
Good. See? He' got balls.

666
00:40:03,956 --> 00:40:06,231
I mean my sidecar'
attached to your bike.

667
00:40:06,316 --> 00:40:08,784
I'd rather turn back,
but how far could I roll?

668
00:40:08,876 --> 00:40:11,913
I'm not gonna let this happen.
I say we go and get his bike.

669
00:40:11,996 --> 00:40:13,031
- You?
- Yeah.

670
00:40:13,116 --> 00:40:16,825
Who died and elected you pope?
This isn't about Dudley, it' about you.

671
00:40:16,916 --> 00:40:18,429
You. All through high school

672
00:40:18,516 --> 00:40:21,394
- it' always about you. I'm sick of it!
- Oh, screw you.

673
00:40:21,476 --> 00:40:24,388
- It' not my fault you hate your life.
- I love my life. I...

674
00:40:24,476 --> 00:40:27,786
Let me tell you something!
This trip was to be about adventure!

675
00:40:27,876 --> 00:40:31,186
You're too busy dragging your baggage
around to let that happen.

676
00:40:31,276 --> 00:40:34,985
Well, thank you, Dr Freud. Look,
I'm not going back to get that bike

677
00:40:35,076 --> 00:40:37,544
to satisfy your bruised ego.
Are you guys with me?

678
00:40:37,636 --> 00:40:39,513
- Oh, I'm with you.
- Yeah, I agree.

679
00:40:39,596 --> 00:40:42,064
There you go. We're
not going back there with you.

680
00:40:42,156 --> 00:40:44,351
Should we go after him?

681
00:40:44,436 --> 00:40:45,789
Probably.

682
00:40:45,876 --> 00:40:48,265
- Are we going to?
- Nope.

683
00:41:44,596 --> 00:41:47,030
Come after us now, assholes.

684
00:42:06,236 --> 00:42:08,591
- I'll be a son of a gun.
- Oh, snap!

685
00:42:09,756 --> 00:42:11,633
You did it! You got her back!

686
00:42:14,076 --> 00:42:15,065
Who' your daddy?!

687
00:42:15,156 --> 00:42:17,624
- You are my daddy!
- Yeah, that' right, baby.

688
00:42:17,716 --> 00:42:19,547
Aw, man!

689
00:42:19,636 --> 00:42:21,752
- Thank you!
- How'd you do it?

690
00:42:21,836 --> 00:42:24,350
OK, they were totally pissed off.

691
00:42:24,436 --> 00:42:26,552
So I take a new tact. Reality.

692
00:42:26,636 --> 00:42:28,786
So I said to 'em,
"Assault us. No problem.

693
00:42:28,876 --> 00:42:30,673
Because we may not be real bikers,

694
00:42:30,756 --> 00:42:33,316
but we know real lawyers.
As soon as you touch us,

695
00:42:33,396 --> 00:42:36,911
we'll sue you for everything you got
and everything you'll have."

696
00:42:36,996 --> 00:42:40,068
They backed down. They totally
backed down. It was awesome.

697
00:42:40,156 --> 00:42:42,033
- You really said that?
- Yeah!

698
00:42:42,116 --> 00:42:43,469
My man!

699
00:42:43,556 --> 00:42:45,945
- Show me love. Show me love.
- Yeah!

700
00:42:46,036 --> 00:42:48,186
Hey, guess what. The trip' back on.

701
00:42:48,276 --> 00:42:49,948
- It' back on!
- The trip is on!

702
00:42:50,036 --> 00:42:51,947
We're gonna go back that way then?

703
00:42:52,036 --> 00:42:53,185
Yeah, they don't care.

704
00:42:53,276 --> 00:42:56,666
We should just do it before
they change their minds.

705
00:42:56,756 --> 00:42:59,634
Pacific Ocean, here we come!

706
00:43:11,756 --> 00:43:14,873
Son of a bitch.
Come on. Come on!

707
00:43:32,396 --> 00:43:34,034
Thanks, guys!

708
00:43:39,796 --> 00:43:42,185
Those assholes got balls.

709
00:43:42,276 --> 00:43:44,870
That I'm gonna put in
my mouth and chew on!

710
00:43:46,116 --> 00:43:48,505
You're gonna put what
in your mouth?

711
00:43:50,356 --> 00:43:53,234
Come on! Del Fuegos,
let' smoke those hogs!

712
00:43:53,316 --> 00:43:55,034
- Let' go!
- Come on!

713
00:44:04,556 --> 00:44:06,114
What the hell? Aw, shit!

714
00:44:06,196 --> 00:44:09,313
Fire, fire! Fire, everybody.

715
00:44:09,396 --> 00:44:11,034
Hey! Fire, come on, get off!

716
00:44:11,116 --> 00:44:12,265
Fire, fire! Get away.

717
00:44:12,356 --> 00:44:14,267
Come on!

718
00:44:14,356 --> 00:44:16,824
Get out of there! Get out of there!

719
00:44:31,916 --> 00:44:35,192
Oh, shit!

720
00:44:35,276 --> 00:44:38,029
Oh, God. Oh, no.

721
00:44:41,196 --> 00:44:42,265
Come on. Let' go!

722
00:44:42,356 --> 00:44:44,870
What' your rush?
My balls are still vibrating.

723
00:44:44,956 --> 00:44:48,631
It' the open road, man.
It' riding free, that' the rush.

724
00:44:48,716 --> 00:44:50,707
This isn't freedom, it' a gas station!

725
00:44:50,796 --> 00:44:53,151
Built by the man!
A prison for our souls!

726
00:44:53,236 --> 00:44:55,875
- My soul needs something to drink.
- I need gas.

727
00:44:55,956 --> 00:45:00,154
We'll get gas at the next station.
Come on, Wild Hogs. Let' go!

728
00:45:01,156 --> 00:45:02,635
Let' ride!

729
00:45:02,716 --> 00:45:04,946
Did I miss the espresso stop?

730
00:45:05,756 --> 00:45:07,792
He' moving.

731
00:45:30,716 --> 00:45:32,832
Woody! You're an asshole.

732
00:45:32,916 --> 00:45:36,955
They should've had a sign that said,
"Last gas, X amount of miles."

733
00:45:41,676 --> 00:45:43,234
I need something to drink.

734
00:45:43,316 --> 00:45:46,114
I'm thirsty.
Or else I'm gonna die!

735
00:45:46,196 --> 00:45:49,711
Yeah. You know,
I keep... saving my spit

736
00:45:49,796 --> 00:45:53,232
so it' like a drink of water, and it
just keeps tasting like my spit.

737
00:45:53,916 --> 00:45:58,194
They say you can get something
to drink out of a cactus, right?

738
00:45:58,276 --> 00:45:59,948
Where are the cactuses?

739
00:46:00,036 --> 00:46:02,231
We're in a desert
that don't have cactuses.

740
00:46:02,316 --> 00:46:03,305
Yeah.

741
00:46:03,396 --> 00:46:07,708
Actually, I think when
it' plural, it' "cacti."

742
00:46:07,796 --> 00:46:09,991
- I'm killing him.
- You're gonna kill him?

743
00:46:10,076 --> 00:46:12,385
We're all thinking it.
We need nourishment.

744
00:46:12,476 --> 00:46:14,751
He'll put up the least struggle. Move.

745
00:46:14,836 --> 00:46:16,189
You love Dudley.

746
00:46:16,276 --> 00:46:18,346
It' the sun. It' making us all crazy.

747
00:46:18,436 --> 00:46:21,712
You're right, man.
My... My bad, Dud.

748
00:46:21,796 --> 00:46:23,832
You know, I don't know
what came over me.

749
00:46:23,916 --> 00:46:27,431
Dehydration. Blood' thickening,
so your heart' working harder

750
00:46:27,516 --> 00:46:30,155
to pump it through arteries.
Less gets to your head.

751
00:46:30,236 --> 00:46:32,431
Our bodies are trying
to drink themselves.

752
00:46:32,516 --> 00:46:34,154
All right. I'm killing him.

753
00:46:34,236 --> 00:46:38,024
They got a sign here.
Curve of the road. Read it!

754
00:46:38,116 --> 00:46:41,074
- Madrid? Spain?
- No. It' Madrid.

755
00:46:41,156 --> 00:46:43,306
That' what the locals say.
I Googled it.

756
00:46:43,396 --> 00:46:45,785
Gonna be water, food, and gas.

757
00:46:45,876 --> 00:46:49,585
- We're gonna live.
- We gonna live!

758
00:46:49,676 --> 00:46:52,065
We gonna live, baby!

759
00:46:55,956 --> 00:46:57,514
Lt' closed!

760
00:46:57,596 --> 00:46:59,871
Ah, man! Lt' closed!

761
00:46:59,956 --> 00:47:03,505
The diner up here...
The diner' open!

762
00:47:03,596 --> 00:47:04,915
Come on!

763
00:47:04,996 --> 00:47:07,874
Get me a drink, quick!

764
00:47:07,956 --> 00:47:09,548
- We need water!
- Quick!

765
00:47:09,636 --> 00:47:11,911
- Hey! Come on!
- Right here. Right here!

766
00:47:12,996 --> 00:47:16,306
- Oh! Right here! Me!
- Me! Me!

767
00:47:16,396 --> 00:47:17,909
- You?
- Me!

768
00:47:23,196 --> 00:47:24,424
- Hey!
- You!

769
00:47:24,516 --> 00:47:28,668
They were just here three weeks ago,
and they're already getting violent.

770
00:47:28,756 --> 00:47:29,745
I got it.

771
00:47:33,996 --> 00:47:36,430
- You gentlemen like a seat?
- Is there a booth?

772
00:47:36,516 --> 00:47:38,313
Let' go!

773
00:47:38,396 --> 00:47:39,670
- Yeah. What?
- Come on.

774
00:47:41,076 --> 00:47:43,715
- Keep moving!
- Nice town.

775
00:47:46,996 --> 00:47:51,945
So... I...

776
00:48:01,036 --> 00:48:04,233
- She is perfect.
- You like the waitress?

777
00:48:04,316 --> 00:48:07,069
Oh, man. I wanted to say
something funny to her,

778
00:48:07,156 --> 00:48:09,147
but all I could think
of was black jokes.

779
00:48:09,236 --> 00:48:12,990
- Like which ones?
- I forget.

780
00:48:13,076 --> 00:48:16,546
Why not tell the one that ends
with you getting your ass whupped?

781
00:48:16,636 --> 00:48:19,309
- Would that be funny?
- I'll be laughing.

782
00:48:19,396 --> 00:48:20,795
Oh, I'll be cracking up.

783
00:48:23,036 --> 00:48:25,789
Oh, it' the law. Oh, boy.

784
00:48:31,036 --> 00:48:32,992
You boys here for the Chile Festival?

785
00:48:33,076 --> 00:48:36,432
What, you have a problem?
You look like you saw something explode

786
00:48:36,516 --> 00:48:38,984
or something.
We're just passing through, man.

787
00:48:39,076 --> 00:48:42,512
The people around here
don't want any more trouble.

788
00:48:42,596 --> 00:48:44,985
Now me, I got no problem
with you Del Fuegos

789
00:48:45,076 --> 00:48:47,385
as long as you boys
could stay sober...

790
00:48:47,476 --> 00:48:50,274
No, no. No, we're not
associated with those assholes.

791
00:48:50,356 --> 00:48:51,948
- You're not?
- No.

792
00:48:52,036 --> 00:48:53,469
- For real?
- Yeah.

793
00:48:53,556 --> 00:48:56,787
Folks, they're not Del Fuegos.

794
00:48:58,836 --> 00:49:01,031
Are the Del Fuegos
a problem around here?

795
00:49:01,116 --> 00:49:03,676
Only if you expect 'em
to pay for a meal they just ate

796
00:49:03,756 --> 00:49:05,155
or a beer they just drank.

797
00:49:05,236 --> 00:49:06,988
- Won't have problems with us.
- No.

798
00:49:07,076 --> 00:49:10,148
- Then welcome to Madrid.
- Excuse me, sheriff?

799
00:49:10,236 --> 00:49:12,272
- The Del Fuegos?
- Yeah.

800
00:49:12,356 --> 00:49:15,632
OK, now. How often might
they come through this town?

801
00:49:15,716 --> 00:49:17,627
Oh, once every few months.

802
00:49:17,716 --> 00:49:18,910
Yeah. Yeah.

803
00:49:18,996 --> 00:49:21,464
The gas station,
now when would that be open?

804
00:49:21,556 --> 00:49:23,865
That' closed on Sundays.
Tomorrow morning.

805
00:49:23,956 --> 00:49:25,309
Oh, God.

806
00:49:25,396 --> 00:49:28,706
Maybe you should seriously
consider spending the night.

807
00:49:28,796 --> 00:49:32,072
Because we're having the
world' hottest chili contest.

808
00:49:32,156 --> 00:49:34,795
The Chile Festival is not
something you wanna miss.

809
00:49:34,876 --> 00:49:37,515
Last year, somebody' throat
started to bleed.

810
00:49:37,596 --> 00:49:39,109
Oh, damn!

811
00:49:39,196 --> 00:49:42,791
- Somebody' throat started to bleed?
- Yeah. Changed their life.

812
00:49:42,876 --> 00:49:46,391
It' great. Think about it.

813
00:49:46,476 --> 00:49:50,105
We gotta get out of this town, man.
This town is a drag. We gotta move on.

814
00:49:50,196 --> 00:49:52,232
- We gotta find a way out.
- Chill out.

815
00:49:52,316 --> 00:49:54,307
We finally get a chance to relax.

816
00:49:54,396 --> 00:49:56,068
And being able to use a bathroom,

817
00:49:56,156 --> 00:49:58,795
- that might be a good idea.
- I can empty my poop bag.

818
00:49:58,876 --> 00:50:00,753
And you gonna re-use the bag?

819
00:50:00,836 --> 00:50:02,588
Remember the theme of this trip?

820
00:50:02,676 --> 00:50:04,473
"Whatever," remember?

821
00:50:04,556 --> 00:50:05,830
OK, fine! Fine.

822
00:50:05,916 --> 00:50:08,510
We'll stay the night
and get gas in the morning. OK?

823
00:50:08,596 --> 00:50:10,951
Calm down.
I don't understand your rush.

824
00:50:11,036 --> 00:50:13,948
I'm not in a rush, man.
I just wanna ride, man.

825
00:50:14,036 --> 00:50:17,631
I just wanna ride. You know?

826
00:50:17,716 --> 00:50:21,311
You are so weird. I mean he asks the...
You say the weirdest things.

827
00:50:21,396 --> 00:50:24,229
"We're digging roots
and buying real estate and shit."

828
00:50:24,316 --> 00:50:26,876
Yeah. Why don't you just...

829
00:50:26,956 --> 00:50:29,424
What? What?

830
00:50:37,156 --> 00:50:40,546
All right, everybody come here.
Come on.

831
00:50:42,836 --> 00:50:45,794
All right, we're here.

832
00:50:45,876 --> 00:50:48,185
Right? They could be
in any of these towns.

833
00:50:48,276 --> 00:50:51,586
Right around here. We're gonna
find them, we're gonna get 'em.

834
00:50:51,676 --> 00:50:53,189
I don't know, Jack.

835
00:50:53,276 --> 00:50:55,790
I mean, by my calculations...
I'm thinking,

836
00:50:55,876 --> 00:50:57,946
if they're four hours
ahead of us, we...

837
00:50:58,036 --> 00:51:00,869
Shut up! Anybody else wanna tell
me how hard this will be?

838
00:51:00,956 --> 00:51:03,709
Huh? Any other naysayers?

839
00:51:03,796 --> 00:51:07,311
Good. I want you to
break up into two-man teams.

840
00:51:07,396 --> 00:51:09,387
You call me when you find 'em.

841
00:51:39,036 --> 00:51:42,312
Oh, snap. A softball pitch.

842
00:51:42,396 --> 00:51:44,705
You... I gotta win
something for my girls.

843
00:51:44,796 --> 00:51:46,707
Wait. You think you're good at this?

844
00:51:46,796 --> 00:51:48,275
Oh, I know I'm good at this.

845
00:51:48,356 --> 00:51:51,553
On my Little League team, they
used to call me Bull' Eye Bobby.

846
00:51:51,636 --> 00:51:53,308
'Cause I had pinpoint control.

847
00:51:53,396 --> 00:51:54,385
Right.

848
00:51:54,476 --> 00:51:56,865
144 innings and never
walked a single batter.

849
00:51:56,956 --> 00:51:59,106
- Watch me work, baby.
- Here you go.

850
00:51:59,196 --> 00:52:01,027
- How you doin'?
- Good luck.

851
00:52:01,116 --> 00:52:03,266
All right, Bull' Eye Bobby, folks!

852
00:52:04,996 --> 00:52:07,226
Bull' Eye Bobby, baby.

853
00:52:08,156 --> 00:52:10,954
It' probably been, what?
Twenty-eight years?

854
00:52:17,356 --> 00:52:19,745
- Hey.
- Hi.

855
00:52:20,716 --> 00:52:22,866
So...

856
00:52:24,116 --> 00:52:26,027
- Excuse me?
- Never mind.

857
00:52:26,116 --> 00:52:28,232
- So you like chili?
- Oh, yeah.

858
00:52:28,316 --> 00:52:31,547
Not the hot stuff. But you put
a mild turkey chili in front of me?

859
00:52:31,636 --> 00:52:33,069
Oh, yeah, I'm gonna eat it.

860
00:52:33,156 --> 00:52:35,590
That' too bad 'cause
I wanted you to try mine,

861
00:52:35,676 --> 00:52:37,792
- but it' pretty hot.
- No, I'll try it!

862
00:52:37,876 --> 00:52:40,436
I like your kinda hot.
In your chili. The chili hot.

863
00:52:40,516 --> 00:52:41,551
Food, hot.

864
00:52:41,636 --> 00:52:44,309
That' the kinda hot
I wanna kiss. Eat.

865
00:52:44,396 --> 00:52:47,513
OK. If you're sure
you can handle it.

866
00:52:47,596 --> 00:52:50,156
Handle it? I'm a biker.

867
00:52:50,236 --> 00:52:52,272
- What'd you call him?
- Bull' Eye Bobby!

868
00:52:52,356 --> 00:52:53,914
Bull' Eye Bobby, baby.

869
00:52:53,996 --> 00:52:56,271
Yeah, Bull' Eye. Yep.

870
00:53:01,996 --> 00:53:04,749
- I guess that counts as a walk?
- I'm gonna sit.

871
00:53:24,156 --> 00:53:26,545
Smooth. Tasty.

872
00:53:26,636 --> 00:53:29,025
Little... spice.

873
00:53:29,116 --> 00:53:31,505
It gets hotter as it
sits in your throat.

874
00:53:33,556 --> 00:53:34,545
You OK?

875
00:53:35,836 --> 00:53:38,066
You want some of this?
Lt'll cool you down.

876
00:53:42,556 --> 00:53:45,628
Don't worry, your throat
won't actually bleed.

877
00:53:47,236 --> 00:53:48,191
I understand.

878
00:53:52,036 --> 00:53:55,426
Mother of God! I swallowed hot lava!

879
00:54:02,756 --> 00:54:04,474
144 innings,

880
00:54:04,556 --> 00:54:06,433
you never hit anybody in the crotch?

881
00:54:06,516 --> 00:54:08,632
Not on purpose, man.
You all right?

882
00:54:08,716 --> 00:54:11,708
- Yeah, it'... Good fastball.
- Hey. I'd like you boys

883
00:54:11,796 --> 00:54:14,026
to meet my deputies,
Earl and Buck Dooble.

884
00:54:14,116 --> 00:54:16,107
- How are you, Earl?
- Earl. He' Buck.

885
00:54:16,196 --> 00:54:18,471
- Fellas. Earl, Buck.
- Now, just remember:

886
00:54:18,556 --> 00:54:21,753
Brother with the word "ear" in his name
has got both on his head.

887
00:54:23,556 --> 00:54:26,195
See, I can only say that
'cause I'm on his right side,

888
00:54:26,276 --> 00:54:28,506
which, as you can see,
is mostly blown off.

889
00:54:28,596 --> 00:54:30,666
- You say something, Earl?
- I did not.

890
00:54:30,756 --> 00:54:33,907
Needless to say,
we don't carry firearms anymore.

891
00:54:33,996 --> 00:54:35,827
I mean, sometimes you pull 'em out,

892
00:54:35,916 --> 00:54:38,555
you think they're not loaded,
then sometimes...

893
00:54:38,636 --> 00:54:40,308
They blow your deputy' ear off?

894
00:54:40,396 --> 00:54:42,227
Yeah.

895
00:54:44,476 --> 00:54:46,546
What brings you boys on this trip?

896
00:54:46,636 --> 00:54:49,469
Firstly, we had to get away, OK?

897
00:54:49,556 --> 00:54:51,865
And secondly, you know,
you just never know

898
00:54:51,956 --> 00:54:54,311
how many more summers
you've got left.

899
00:54:54,396 --> 00:54:57,706
- Do you?
- Wow. That' deep.

900
00:54:57,796 --> 00:54:59,593
I just came on this trip,

901
00:54:59,676 --> 00:55:02,634
you know, hoping to reclaim
the old Doug, you know?

902
00:55:02,716 --> 00:55:05,708
You know, I know
exactly what you mean.

903
00:55:05,796 --> 00:55:09,584
You know, you can never let life
get too stagnant or too safe.

904
00:55:09,676 --> 00:55:11,189
Every now and then
you gotta do

905
00:55:11,276 --> 00:55:14,268
what we folks around here
like to call "Slap the Bull."

906
00:55:14,356 --> 00:55:18,031
- What' Slapping the Bull?
- That' just a little game we play

907
00:55:18,116 --> 00:55:20,869
to make sure your life
is not controlled by fear.

908
00:55:20,956 --> 00:55:22,594
Yeah, I wanna do that.

909
00:55:22,676 --> 00:55:24,667
Oh, come on, guys.
We're exhausted.

910
00:55:24,756 --> 00:55:27,316
I think we should put
the bikes in back of the hotel,

911
00:55:27,396 --> 00:55:30,945
in a shed with the doors closed,
perhaps, and then play Scrabble

912
00:55:31,036 --> 00:55:33,152
in the... in the room
with the shades down.

913
00:55:33,236 --> 00:55:36,433
Aunt Bee, maybe you wanna
do something else here in Mayberry.

914
00:55:36,516 --> 00:55:37,505
Yeah.

915
00:55:37,596 --> 00:55:41,032
- How 'bout Bull Slapping?
- Sounds like something I could win at.

916
00:55:41,116 --> 00:55:42,993
- Yeah.
- I'll take a little Bull Slap.

917
00:55:43,076 --> 00:55:44,714
Look, Bull Slap for everybody.

918
00:55:44,796 --> 00:55:46,673
Line 'em up. Let' have a Bull Slap.

919
00:55:47,196 --> 00:55:48,106
We'll do it!

920
00:55:48,236 --> 00:55:51,034
So... literally,
we're gonna slap a bull?

921
00:55:51,076 --> 00:55:53,795
Yep. Right on the ass.
And then you're gonna wanna

922
00:55:53,876 --> 00:55:55,150
hightaiI it outta there.

923
00:55:55,236 --> 00:55:56,715
- Why?
- He can kill you.

924
00:55:57,276 --> 00:55:58,231
Perfect.

925
00:55:58,316 --> 00:56:00,511
Hey, I thought this
was a drinking game.

926
00:56:00,596 --> 00:56:03,110
You know, you got
a lot of animals I would slap.

927
00:56:03,196 --> 00:56:05,869
A chicken, I'd slap a chicken.
Or a goat, maybe.

928
00:56:05,956 --> 00:56:07,548
A ferret, I'd slap, you know?

929
00:56:07,636 --> 00:56:09,672
But I'm not...
I'm not gonna slap a bull.

930
00:56:09,756 --> 00:56:12,429
Oh, come on, Doug.
It was your idea. Get in there!

931
00:56:12,516 --> 00:56:14,871
I didn't know we...
Look at the nuts on that!

932
00:56:14,956 --> 00:56:15,866
Come on!

933
00:56:15,956 --> 00:56:17,753
- It' not safe.
- It' not safe.

934
00:56:17,836 --> 00:56:20,794
- Snooze, you lose. I'm going.
- Getting ready to do that?

935
00:56:20,876 --> 00:56:22,389
Yep!

936
00:56:22,476 --> 00:56:25,434
Jackass. Go ahead, Woody.
Hope you're wearing a cup.

937
00:56:27,036 --> 00:56:29,504
- Right on the ass.
- He looks confident.

938
00:56:29,596 --> 00:56:30,870
Easy.

939
00:56:41,236 --> 00:56:43,147
Come on, get back, now!

940
00:56:46,276 --> 00:56:47,595
Way to get back!

941
00:56:47,676 --> 00:56:50,144
I just slapped
a big fat bull on the ass!

942
00:56:50,236 --> 00:56:52,352
That was awesome! Who' next?

943
00:56:52,436 --> 00:56:54,586
- Doug?
- Doug?

944
00:56:54,676 --> 00:56:56,553
Yeah, no, that'd be you, yeah.

945
00:56:56,636 --> 00:56:57,864
Come on, Doug. Do it!

946
00:56:57,956 --> 00:56:59,469
Lt'... it... you could...

947
00:56:59,556 --> 00:57:00,989
That' really an...

948
00:57:01,076 --> 00:57:02,987
Doug, go.

949
00:57:03,076 --> 00:57:05,226
- Come on, man!
- Handle your business.

950
00:57:05,316 --> 00:57:06,988
- It was easy.
- I'm not gonna...

951
00:57:07,076 --> 00:57:08,907
Yeah, come on! Lt' fun!

952
00:57:09,676 --> 00:57:11,667
"Old days," Doug. "Old days."

953
00:57:11,756 --> 00:57:13,667
All right, I'm gonna slap a bull.

954
00:57:13,756 --> 00:57:15,109
I'm gonna slap that bull.

955
00:57:15,196 --> 00:57:16,868
- There you go.
- That' my Doug!

956
00:57:16,956 --> 00:57:17,911
There he goes.

957
00:57:18,956 --> 00:57:20,753
Just slap it there
on the rear end?

958
00:57:20,836 --> 00:57:23,396
Right on the hind haunches.

959
00:57:25,516 --> 00:57:29,509
- You know, this is so good for Doug.
- Actually, it' good for all of us.

960
00:57:29,596 --> 00:57:31,507
Yeah. Thanks for bringing us here.

961
00:57:31,596 --> 00:57:33,234
Sure. Glad we could help.

962
00:57:33,316 --> 00:57:35,876
Yeah, and we never
seen it done twice in a row.

963
00:57:35,956 --> 00:57:37,230
What?

964
00:57:37,316 --> 00:57:42,026
Be interesting to see how the bull
takes being slapped now that he' alert.

965
00:57:42,116 --> 00:57:43,515
- Alert?
- Alert?

966
00:57:46,436 --> 00:57:48,267
- Yah!
- Get back, now!

967
00:57:48,356 --> 00:57:49,914
- Hurry!
- Hey! Come on.

968
00:57:56,756 --> 00:57:58,633
He coming back!

969
00:58:00,996 --> 00:58:01,985
Bull!

970
00:58:02,756 --> 00:58:05,111
He coming back! He coming back!

971
00:58:07,716 --> 00:58:08,705
He almost got me!

972
00:58:08,796 --> 00:58:11,071
Come on! What' this bully want?
Come on!

973
00:58:11,156 --> 00:58:13,954
You don't wanna use mockery!
That never works!

974
00:58:14,036 --> 00:58:15,435
Cowboy' in trouble!

975
00:58:16,596 --> 00:58:18,632
Maybe if you just
try to reason with it!

976
00:58:18,716 --> 00:58:21,389
He' coming back for more!
Look out!

977
00:58:21,476 --> 00:58:24,115
He' more afraid of you
than you are of him!

978
00:58:24,196 --> 00:58:25,549
Watch out!

979
00:58:25,636 --> 00:58:27,388
Watch out, watch out. Come on!

980
00:58:27,476 --> 00:58:29,307
Come on, let' go, let' go!

981
00:58:33,556 --> 00:58:34,955
What?!

982
00:58:35,036 --> 00:58:36,947
Yeah, man, this is living!

983
00:58:37,036 --> 00:58:39,231
Yeah, we slapped
a bull on the ass!

984
00:58:39,316 --> 00:58:40,635
- Yes, sir!
- Yeah!

985
00:58:40,716 --> 00:58:42,434
Yeah, you sure did.

986
00:58:43,396 --> 00:58:44,545
Sure did!

987
00:58:44,636 --> 00:58:45,830
Did y'all see my moves?

988
00:58:45,916 --> 00:58:48,669
I was shaking and baking
just like the NFL, baby!

989
00:58:48,756 --> 00:58:50,394
You hear what I'm saying?

990
00:58:50,476 --> 00:58:53,673
I delivered it right to the end zone!

991
00:59:11,396 --> 00:59:13,864
- Look at him.
- He threw Bobby ten feet in the air.

992
00:59:13,956 --> 00:59:16,516
Hey, man, that damn bull
kept following me around.

993
00:59:16,596 --> 00:59:18,029
You think it was my cologne?

994
00:59:18,116 --> 00:59:21,791
- What are you wearing, Rodeo Clown?
- Hold on. So now you got jokes?

995
00:59:22,876 --> 00:59:27,347
Woody, you know, I apologise for saying
you had ego issues earlier. All right?

996
00:59:27,436 --> 00:59:28,915
Sorry I called you a pussy.

997
00:59:30,556 --> 00:59:31,909
You didn't call me a pussy.

998
00:59:31,996 --> 00:59:35,955
No, not to your face,
but that' what I was thinking!

999
00:59:36,036 --> 00:59:39,108
We're just saying how much fun
this trip' turned out to be.

1000
00:59:39,196 --> 00:59:41,835
I was so close this time! So close!

1001
00:59:41,916 --> 00:59:43,395
What' the matter, Dudley?

1002
00:59:43,476 --> 00:59:45,865
The waitress. I think she likes me.

1003
00:59:45,956 --> 00:59:46,945
- Good.
- Good.

1004
00:59:47,036 --> 00:59:49,869
It' not good. She told me
to meet her on the dance floor.

1005
00:59:49,956 --> 00:59:51,230
- So?
- So? Go dance.

1006
00:59:51,316 --> 00:59:54,388
I can't go on the dance floor.
You know what I look like.

1007
00:59:54,476 --> 00:59:56,990
The music moves me,
but it moves me ugly.

1008
00:59:57,076 --> 00:59:59,636
Do the sprinkler thing you did
at my wedding.

1009
00:59:59,716 --> 01:00:01,513
- Yeah.
- I can't do the sprinkler.

1010
01:00:01,596 --> 01:00:04,793
I've gotta... I need to...

1011
01:00:05,716 --> 01:00:07,069
- No.
- Yes.

1012
01:00:07,156 --> 01:00:08,384
I said no.

1013
01:00:08,476 --> 01:00:11,274
Why don't we keep it simple,
why don't we just...

1014
01:00:11,356 --> 01:00:14,268
We'll do the lindy. I'll be
the guy, you be the girl.

1015
01:00:14,356 --> 01:00:17,029
There we go.
And it' just... Remember?

1016
01:00:17,116 --> 01:00:18,071
OK. Yeah, right.

1017
01:00:18,156 --> 01:00:22,354
One and two and three and four and
turn her around and start over again.

1018
01:00:22,436 --> 01:00:23,551
Do it two times and...

1019
01:00:23,636 --> 01:00:25,547
- Whatever you want.
- I'll be the guy.

1020
01:00:25,636 --> 01:00:27,706
- Be the guy, I'll be the girl.
- OK. Ready?

1021
01:00:27,796 --> 01:00:29,912
And one and two and three and four.

1022
01:00:29,996 --> 01:00:32,669
One and two and three and four,

1023
01:00:32,756 --> 01:00:35,190
- and turn me around and...
- Yeah! Now we're...

1024
01:00:35,276 --> 01:00:37,471
Oh, OK, that' enough.
That' good lesson.

1025
01:00:37,556 --> 01:00:38,955
What? No, wait. Is that it?

1026
01:00:39,036 --> 01:00:41,504
- That' enough.
- That' just a pocket knife.

1027
01:00:43,116 --> 01:00:45,630
There she is. You're ready. Go.

1028
01:00:45,716 --> 01:00:47,547
- Yeah, let' do it.
- I'm ready.

1029
01:00:47,636 --> 01:00:49,672
You're ready. Come on. Go.

1030
01:01:15,836 --> 01:01:17,110
Yeah!

1031
01:01:23,996 --> 01:01:25,224
Check it out.

1032
01:01:41,596 --> 01:01:43,826
- He' panicking.
- He' panicking.

1033
01:02:11,276 --> 01:02:13,631
Hey! That' my phone!

1034
01:02:13,716 --> 01:02:15,672
Your minutes just expired.

1035
01:02:17,116 --> 01:02:20,392
- Baby! Baby, it' Murdock.
- Tell me you found them.

1036
01:02:20,476 --> 01:02:22,944
We did. They're in Madrid.

1037
01:02:23,036 --> 01:02:26,312
Good! Good, good, good, good.
I like Madrid!

1038
01:02:26,396 --> 01:02:28,273
Ground is soft enough to bury them in.

1039
01:02:28,356 --> 01:02:30,153
Want us to smack 'em around?

1040
01:02:30,236 --> 01:02:31,635
<i>No! No, no, no!</i>
<i>Listen to me!</i>

1041
01:02:31,716 --> 01:02:33,911
You just make sure
they stay there. OK?

1042
01:02:33,996 --> 01:02:35,952
But do not touch them.
They're mine.

1043
01:02:36,036 --> 01:02:38,345
I wanna feel their bones
break under my fists.

1044
01:02:38,436 --> 01:02:41,951
Sounds like a good beating, Jack.
We'll leave 'em for you then.

1045
01:02:43,476 --> 01:02:46,388
Anyone else want some
Wild Hog for breakfast?

1046
01:02:53,156 --> 01:02:55,386
You expect me to pay
for this piss-warm beer?

1047
01:02:55,476 --> 01:02:57,785
Here, you can have it back.

1048
01:03:02,236 --> 01:03:04,466
If we drank piss, we'd drink it cold!

1049
01:03:05,836 --> 01:03:06,951
What?

1050
01:03:08,316 --> 01:03:09,954
Guys, guys, guys, guys, look...

1051
01:03:10,036 --> 01:03:11,947
We don't drink piss!

1052
01:03:15,516 --> 01:03:17,871
Hey, Woody. Maybe
it' time to give these guys

1053
01:03:17,956 --> 01:03:20,914
- another one of your talks.
- I think we just avoid them, OK?

1054
01:03:20,996 --> 01:03:22,907
I handled this legally. We should go.

1055
01:03:22,996 --> 01:03:26,033
You know what? I'm talking
to these assholes this time.

1056
01:03:26,116 --> 01:03:27,674
Shouldn't have to do it twice.

1057
01:03:27,756 --> 01:03:30,350
You took care of them
last time, and I just sat there.

1058
01:03:30,436 --> 01:03:33,667
But this time, you know what?
They wanna see rage? Watch me.

1059
01:03:33,756 --> 01:03:35,269
No! Wait, wait...

1060
01:03:35,356 --> 01:03:37,347
Hey, assholes!

1061
01:03:37,436 --> 01:03:40,473
You boys got a lot of trouble coming.
You know that, right?

1062
01:03:40,556 --> 01:03:45,186
I'm gonna tell you again, like my friend
told your cracker-ass, inbred buddies...

1063
01:03:45,276 --> 01:03:46,675
Did he just say "cracker"?

1064
01:03:46,756 --> 01:03:48,348
- "Cracker-ass."
- Perfect.

1065
01:03:48,436 --> 01:03:51,155
You touch us, and we'll
sue your ass so hard,

1066
01:03:51,236 --> 01:03:53,511
you'll be taking out
a loan just to piss.

1067
01:03:53,596 --> 01:03:57,475
Now, if that ain't clear enough
for you, maybe this is: Splash.

1068
01:03:57,556 --> 01:03:59,672
Got it? Did I get it in your mouth?

1069
01:03:59,756 --> 01:04:02,316
Splash! Splash!
Did I get you on some of that?

1070
01:04:02,396 --> 01:04:03,954
You crossed a line there.

1071
01:04:04,036 --> 01:04:06,675
No, no, no, no, no!
It ain't worth it, man.

1072
01:04:06,756 --> 01:04:08,394
Jack'll kill us if we touch him.

1073
01:04:08,476 --> 01:04:10,307
- So just...
- Break some of that up.

1074
01:04:10,396 --> 01:04:12,148
Got a little treat for you.

1075
01:04:12,236 --> 01:04:13,874
Huh? Break a little of that up.

1076
01:04:16,476 --> 01:04:18,592
Can you hear that?
Can you hear that?

1077
01:04:22,556 --> 01:04:25,389
- That' not a discussion.
- No, that' a lawsuit.

1078
01:04:27,436 --> 01:04:28,391
Look at that.

1079
01:04:33,316 --> 01:04:34,465
That' gonna stain.

1080
01:04:34,556 --> 01:04:37,992
You boys look like you belong
on a couple of hot dogs.

1081
01:04:38,076 --> 01:04:42,115
Now, if there' any other Del Fuegos

1082
01:04:42,196 --> 01:04:44,232
that need that message repeated,

1083
01:04:44,316 --> 01:04:46,272
you tell them that the Wild Hogs...

1084
01:04:49,756 --> 01:04:53,431
...are right here in Madrid, baby,
ready to explain it again.

1085
01:04:53,516 --> 01:04:55,666
You got that?

1086
01:04:55,756 --> 01:04:57,394
I said, you got that?

1087
01:04:58,916 --> 01:05:00,747
Sweet mother of mercy!

1088
01:05:04,676 --> 01:05:08,555
He don't want it.
He don't want it. I'm hungry.

1089
01:05:10,356 --> 01:05:11,709
Let' evacuate! Come on!

1090
01:05:16,356 --> 01:05:18,028
Beer, here!

1091
01:05:18,116 --> 01:05:21,552
Wild Hogs, I gotta tell you, you
don't know how many broken windows

1092
01:05:21,636 --> 01:05:23,069
you guys saved this town.

1093
01:05:23,156 --> 01:05:26,432
It' the least we could do
for our new friends here in Madrid.

1094
01:05:26,516 --> 01:05:28,711
- Right, Bobby?
- Wild Hogs!

1095
01:05:28,796 --> 01:05:30,991
Wild Hogs!

1096
01:05:31,076 --> 01:05:33,954
- That' some good work you did there.
- Hey, thank you.

1097
01:05:34,036 --> 01:05:37,870
Look, if you need something done,
just come to me. You know what I mean?

1098
01:05:37,956 --> 01:05:41,835
'Cause I will beat shit down. Let'
say them peanuts are bothering you.

1099
01:05:41,916 --> 01:05:44,032
I don't wanna hear it!

1100
01:05:44,116 --> 01:05:48,234
What'd the sheriff tell you? What'd
the town people tell you? What the?

1101
01:05:48,316 --> 01:05:49,465
You know what I mean?

1102
01:05:49,556 --> 01:05:52,787
I ain't got no problem with it.
I ain't got no problem with it.

1103
01:05:52,876 --> 01:05:55,948
Yeah. Yeah. That' all right.

1104
01:05:56,036 --> 01:05:59,187
This is great. Right, Woody?

1105
01:05:59,276 --> 01:06:02,154
- Huh?
- You all right?

1106
01:06:04,836 --> 01:06:05,791
Yeah...

1107
01:06:07,116 --> 01:06:08,629
- I'm gonna call Kelly.
- Yeah.

1108
01:06:08,716 --> 01:06:10,832
Remind her what
kind of a stud she married.

1109
01:06:10,916 --> 01:06:13,635
All right, yeah, you do that.

1110
01:06:16,836 --> 01:06:18,235
Hey, hey, Bobby!

1111
01:06:18,316 --> 01:06:20,386
Next time, I handle
those bozos, eh?

1112
01:06:20,476 --> 01:06:23,115
The wrath of Dudley! Wild Hogs!

1113
01:06:23,196 --> 01:06:25,232
Wild Hogs!

1114
01:06:25,316 --> 01:06:27,625
Tequila, on the Wild Hogs.

1115
01:06:30,996 --> 01:06:33,271
In New Mexico.
We actually slapped a bull.

1116
01:06:33,356 --> 01:06:35,108
Slapped it right on the ass.

1117
01:06:35,196 --> 01:06:37,426
You have no idea how
turned on I am right now,

1118
01:06:37,516 --> 01:06:39,711
- but be careful.
- We're like celebrities.

1119
01:06:39,796 --> 01:06:41,787
- Bobby is.
- I crushed them cashews.

1120
01:06:41,876 --> 01:06:43,707
- Macadamia nuts.
- Oh, macadamia?

1121
01:06:43,796 --> 01:06:45,149
I'd kick it out of the park.

1122
01:06:45,236 --> 01:06:47,796
Hey! And guess who
dropped by to say hello.

1123
01:06:47,876 --> 01:06:50,231
Karen. I think
she' feeling a little lonely.

1124
01:06:50,316 --> 01:06:51,954
- Who' that?
- Oh, it' Doug.

1125
01:06:52,036 --> 01:06:53,947
He says they're having a great time.

1126
01:06:54,036 --> 01:06:57,267
- Kelly, don't tell her about the...
- Road trip?

1127
01:06:59,796 --> 01:07:01,946
Hey! Dudley,
don't you wanna come inside?

1128
01:07:02,036 --> 01:07:06,746
I'm fine. I'm just gonna... sit out
here for a little while, I think.

1129
01:07:06,836 --> 01:07:08,792
OK. You OK?

1130
01:07:09,556 --> 01:07:12,195
I'm fine. I'm...

1131
01:07:15,596 --> 01:07:18,793
No, the truth is I'm not OK.
The truth is I like you a lot, Maggie.

1132
01:07:21,876 --> 01:07:24,310
I'm liking you a lot too.

1133
01:07:24,396 --> 01:07:27,069
See, that' what I was afraid of.

1134
01:07:28,356 --> 01:07:30,790
That you would like me
without knowing...

1135
01:07:30,876 --> 01:07:32,946
Without me telling you...

1136
01:07:36,156 --> 01:07:38,147
I'm not a cool biker, Maggie.

1137
01:07:38,236 --> 01:07:40,625
I'm not a cool anything.

1138
01:07:41,476 --> 01:07:42,989
I'm a computer programmer.

1139
01:07:43,076 --> 01:07:45,146
I'm just a geek.

1140
01:07:45,236 --> 01:07:49,548
I'm sorry if you thought
I was somebody that I'm not.

1141
01:07:56,396 --> 01:07:59,468
You're not a geek.

1142
01:08:03,116 --> 01:08:05,346
You're a lot of fun.

1143
01:08:08,116 --> 01:08:10,755
And you're really honest.

1144
01:08:13,716 --> 01:08:15,832
And you're really sweet.

1145
01:08:19,476 --> 01:08:22,070
You're the kind of guy
that' hard to find.

1146
01:08:29,196 --> 01:08:30,709
Jesus. Sorry.

1147
01:08:31,956 --> 01:08:33,992
Try again. One more time.

1148
01:08:38,956 --> 01:08:41,186
All right, Bobby! All gassed up!

1149
01:08:43,476 --> 01:08:46,229
- All gassed up, baby!
- Let' get Dudley. Let' go!

1150
01:08:46,316 --> 01:08:47,749
- Clive, what' up?
- My man!

1151
01:08:47,836 --> 01:08:49,633
What you know? No good?
All right.

1152
01:08:49,716 --> 01:08:52,992
We're going to high altitudes.
We should check tire pressures.

1153
01:08:53,076 --> 01:08:54,634
No, no, little buddy.

1154
01:08:54,716 --> 01:08:56,627
We gotta ride.
We gotta get going, OK?

1155
01:08:56,716 --> 01:08:58,946
We got new experiences
and new locations.

1156
01:08:59,036 --> 01:09:01,834
We can't leave, man.
I'm like the mayor of this town.

1157
01:09:01,916 --> 01:09:04,430
- My people need me.
- I said we're leaving!

1158
01:09:05,476 --> 01:09:08,627
Hey, guys. We decided
we wanna have breakfast here

1159
01:09:08,716 --> 01:09:10,832
Come on! Hey, cowboy!
Let' saddle up, OK?

1160
01:09:10,916 --> 01:09:13,510
- You're burning daylight. Let' go!
- Got a problem

1161
01:09:13,596 --> 01:09:16,747
- with hanging a few minutes?
- Do I look like I have a problem?

1162
01:09:16,836 --> 01:09:18,110
- Yeah.
- Yes.

1163
01:09:18,196 --> 01:09:20,835
There you go again.
Saying the weirdest shit.

1164
01:09:31,356 --> 01:09:33,426
Del Fuegos!
Hide the bikes! Quick!

1165
01:09:33,516 --> 01:09:35,632
- Why, why?
- Just do it! Trust me!

1166
01:09:35,716 --> 01:09:39,425
What' wrong?
Why are we hiding?

1167
01:09:39,516 --> 01:09:41,950
- What' going on?
- I don't know.

1168
01:09:52,356 --> 01:09:54,392
- Oh, God!
- Why are we hiding?

1169
01:09:54,476 --> 01:09:56,592
You took care of this
already, didn't you?

1170
01:09:56,676 --> 01:09:58,189
Lt' not like you think, OK?

1171
01:09:58,276 --> 01:10:00,631
Well, what is it that I think?

1172
01:10:00,716 --> 01:10:02,752
I didn't really talk to them, OK?

1173
01:10:02,836 --> 01:10:04,827
- Serious?
- I knew something was wrong.

1174
01:10:04,916 --> 01:10:08,352
- You're like "I'm all stupid...
- This is not Dudley' fault!

1175
01:10:08,436 --> 01:10:10,586
...take my bike,
give me junk, I'm happy."

1176
01:10:10,676 --> 01:10:12,746
You're all, "I'm scared.
Let' get out."

1177
01:10:12,836 --> 01:10:14,315
- Whatever.
- It' our fault?

1178
01:10:14,396 --> 01:10:16,671
The Del Fuegos are all,
"We're real bikers."

1179
01:10:16,756 --> 01:10:17,950
This isn't about us!

1180
01:10:18,036 --> 01:10:20,106
- What did you do to them?
- What did you do?

1181
01:10:20,196 --> 01:10:22,994
I...

1182
01:10:24,476 --> 01:10:27,149
I cut their the gas lines
of their bikes.

1183
01:10:27,236 --> 01:10:29,113
And then I...

1184
01:10:29,196 --> 01:10:32,427
- What?
- Maybe blew up their bar.

1185
01:10:32,516 --> 01:10:33,869
Perfect!

1186
01:10:33,956 --> 01:10:36,709
- Oh, we're dead!
- Oh, come on!

1187
01:10:36,796 --> 01:10:38,991
Wait a minute! Wait a minute!

1188
01:10:39,076 --> 01:10:41,385
That means they're
just here to kill us.

1189
01:10:47,156 --> 01:10:49,033
No sign of 'em, Jack.

1190
01:10:52,436 --> 01:10:54,347
Wild Hogs!

1191
01:10:54,436 --> 01:10:57,348
Come out, come out,
wherever you are!

1192
01:10:57,436 --> 01:10:59,791
I finally meet a girl,
and now I'm gonna die.

1193
01:10:59,876 --> 01:11:01,992
So all the mustard and the ketchup...

1194
01:11:02,076 --> 01:11:03,907
...didn't help the situation, huh?

1195
01:11:05,796 --> 01:11:09,311
Oh, you don't
wanna come out? We'll wait!

1196
01:11:10,316 --> 01:11:12,546
There' only one road
out of this town!

1197
01:11:12,636 --> 01:11:14,467
We own it!

1198
01:11:14,556 --> 01:11:18,151
Me and my boys'll be in this
lovely little diner here!

1199
01:11:18,236 --> 01:11:22,707
Get out of here!
The longer you keep us waiting,

1200
01:11:22,796 --> 01:11:26,994
the worse it' gonna get for
the peaceful town of Madrid!

1201
01:11:30,756 --> 01:11:34,351
Jack! I'm going to ask you not to.

1202
01:11:34,436 --> 01:11:36,188
What did you say, you little turd?

1203
01:11:36,276 --> 01:11:38,187
- What did he say?
- Called him a turd.

1204
01:11:41,076 --> 01:11:41,986
Let' go!

1205
01:11:42,076 --> 01:11:44,226
Enjoy.

1206
01:11:44,316 --> 01:11:45,749
OK, I made a mistake.

1207
01:11:45,836 --> 01:11:48,748
Woody, we could have just
went home, man, and been fine.

1208
01:11:48,836 --> 01:11:51,145
Well, you know,
maybe I don't have a home.

1209
01:11:51,236 --> 01:11:53,147
Claudia left me.

1210
01:11:53,236 --> 01:11:55,352
Three months ago she left.

1211
01:11:55,436 --> 01:11:57,825
And then I fell apart.
Lost my clients.

1212
01:11:57,916 --> 01:11:59,747
And then I lost my job.

1213
01:11:59,836 --> 01:12:02,396
Now I got to sell the house
and I got to sell the car.

1214
01:12:02,476 --> 01:12:04,671
Can't even get
the lawn raked, you know.

1215
01:12:04,756 --> 01:12:07,224
I just got the bike and I got
you guys. That' all.

1216
01:12:07,316 --> 01:12:10,308
So this trip is all about
you running away from your

1217
01:12:10,396 --> 01:12:12,830
miserable, screwed-up life?

1218
01:12:12,916 --> 01:12:15,350
And you screw up our lives?

1219
01:12:15,436 --> 01:12:16,835
Asshole!

1220
01:12:16,916 --> 01:12:20,955
I'm sorry about your situation,
Woody, but you're a lying asshole.

1221
01:12:21,036 --> 01:12:23,914
- Which is like an asshole' asshole.
- I thought that...

1222
01:12:23,996 --> 01:12:27,432
I thought that being a Wild Hog
meant something. Clearly it doesn't.

1223
01:12:27,516 --> 01:12:30,030
You don't care about me!
Fine. I don't care.

1224
01:12:30,116 --> 01:12:31,913
It doesn't mean anything, Woody!

1225
01:12:31,996 --> 01:12:34,271
Remember, it' just
a patch my wife made!

1226
01:12:34,356 --> 01:12:38,349
We should go where there aren't people
trying to kill us to yell at each other.

1227
01:12:43,356 --> 01:12:44,505
Hey, Maggie.

1228
01:12:46,156 --> 01:12:48,670
Thanks for letting us hide
in your house.

1229
01:12:48,756 --> 01:12:49,745
Yeah, thanks.

1230
01:12:49,836 --> 01:12:52,828
Hard not to when you're
screaming and kicking the door.

1231
01:12:52,916 --> 01:12:56,067
Hey. You OK?

1232
01:12:56,156 --> 01:12:59,114
Yeah. Diner' the only thing I have.

1233
01:12:59,196 --> 01:13:01,107
If that gets destroyed, it'...

1234
01:13:01,196 --> 01:13:05,189
But you're safe. You guys are safe.

1235
01:13:05,276 --> 01:13:06,834
Now just stay put.

1236
01:13:06,916 --> 01:13:09,066
Nobody has to go out
there and be a hero.

1237
01:13:09,156 --> 01:13:10,669
You got that right.

1238
01:13:10,756 --> 01:13:14,146
- You guys aren't going out?
- You're the sheriff. Why don't you go?

1239
01:13:14,236 --> 01:13:17,467
Like sheriff of a town of 500 people.

1240
01:13:17,556 --> 01:13:20,434
I got my qualification
from a course on the Internet.

1241
01:13:20,516 --> 01:13:22,984
For arms training, they
just told us to play <i>Doom.</i>

1242
01:13:23,076 --> 01:13:24,907
I say we just wait it out.

1243
01:13:24,996 --> 01:13:26,987
They'll lose interest,
and they'll go.

1244
01:13:27,076 --> 01:13:29,146
Yeah, I agree. Wait it out.

1245
01:13:30,436 --> 01:13:33,394
Hey. Where' Dudley?

1246
01:13:40,436 --> 01:13:42,313
Oh, Dudley. Don't do that.

1247
01:13:45,796 --> 01:13:48,674
All right, you Del Fuegos.

1248
01:13:59,596 --> 01:14:00,949
Let' end this.

1249
01:14:01,036 --> 01:14:03,630
At least one of you
came out to face the music.

1250
01:14:03,716 --> 01:14:06,992
Very brave. But stupid.

1251
01:14:07,076 --> 01:14:08,987
I didn't come to face any music.

1252
01:14:09,076 --> 01:14:12,352
I came here to stop you fellas
from hurting this diner,

1253
01:14:12,436 --> 01:14:15,394
which the love of my life
just happens to own.

1254
01:14:15,476 --> 01:14:20,789
So if it' gotta get ugly...
I'll give you ugly.

1255
01:14:28,116 --> 01:14:30,072
It slipped out of my glove.

1256
01:14:30,156 --> 01:14:32,909
Hey! Is it OK if I tell people
you guys did that?

1257
01:14:32,996 --> 01:14:34,873
I should be getting back. It' late.

1258
01:14:34,956 --> 01:14:37,948
The guys are gonna be
worrying. We'll talk later.

1259
01:14:38,916 --> 01:14:40,588
Guys! Guys!

1260
01:14:40,676 --> 01:14:42,792
No. You don't get
to hide out here with us.

1261
01:14:42,876 --> 01:14:45,470
You get to hide out outside
with those crazy people

1262
01:14:45,556 --> 01:14:47,512
- that wanna kill us.
- They got Dudley.

1263
01:14:47,596 --> 01:14:49,393
- Look out the window.
- What?

1264
01:14:49,476 --> 01:14:52,354
All right, this is
what' gonna happen, Wild Hogs!

1265
01:14:52,436 --> 01:14:56,634
You're gonna pay
a disobedience fee of $10,000!

1266
01:14:56,716 --> 01:15:00,026
Plus another $40,000
to rebuild the bar!

1267
01:15:00,116 --> 01:15:02,584
And if you wanna
see your friend alive again,

1268
01:15:02,676 --> 01:15:04,553
do not call the cops!

1269
01:15:04,636 --> 01:15:07,230
If you're not here
in a half an hour to settle this,

1270
01:15:07,316 --> 01:15:10,274
I'm gonna take the fine out
on your friend' legs!

1271
01:15:10,356 --> 01:15:12,870
I'm gonna break 'em
with this tire iron!

1272
01:15:12,956 --> 01:15:14,867
- Yeah!
- Don't bring the money!

1273
01:15:14,956 --> 01:15:18,392
I'm a computer programmer!
I don't need my legs!

1274
01:15:18,476 --> 01:15:21,593
Fine! I'll break his hands!

1275
01:15:21,676 --> 01:15:23,109
- Yeah!
- Oh, damn it.

1276
01:15:23,196 --> 01:15:24,549
Bring the money!

1277
01:15:24,636 --> 01:15:27,469
Definitely! Definitely bring money!

1278
01:15:27,556 --> 01:15:30,389
- Get him out of here!
- Now! We need money!

1279
01:15:31,916 --> 01:15:33,713
Dudley went there to save the diner

1280
01:15:33,796 --> 01:15:35,832
and now they're
gonna break his hands.

1281
01:15:35,916 --> 01:15:38,635
They're not. We're gonna...
We're gonna get him back.

1282
01:15:38,716 --> 01:15:41,628
I've called the highway patrol.
Will be here in two hours.

1283
01:15:41,716 --> 01:15:43,434
Hey, man. They said no cops,

1284
01:15:43,516 --> 01:15:45,586
else they gonna take it out on Dudley.

1285
01:15:45,676 --> 01:15:48,748
We don't wanna piss 'em off
untiI we get him out of their hands.

1286
01:15:48,836 --> 01:15:50,792
He' not exactly in their hands now.

1287
01:15:50,876 --> 01:15:52,434
Why not? He was sitting...

1288
01:15:52,516 --> 01:15:55,826
- What the?
- Get me down!

1289
01:15:55,916 --> 01:15:58,794
Why? You look good up there!

1290
01:15:58,876 --> 01:16:01,344
You look like a pi�ata with red hair!

1291
01:16:02,436 --> 01:16:05,712
I think I'm gonna keep you there
till your buddies come!

1292
01:16:05,796 --> 01:16:08,264
And then if they don't,
I'm gonna bust you open

1293
01:16:08,356 --> 01:16:11,154
and we're gonna see
what falls out! Ha!

1294
01:16:12,196 --> 01:16:14,505
Bobby! Woody! Doug!

1295
01:16:14,596 --> 01:16:16,473
- What are we gonna do?
- I don't know.

1296
01:16:16,556 --> 01:16:18,786
I know what I'm gonna do.
I'm gonna go get him.

1297
01:16:18,876 --> 01:16:21,344
There you go talking crazy again.

1298
01:16:21,436 --> 01:16:22,630
They will kill you.

1299
01:16:22,716 --> 01:16:24,035
I'm not talking crazy.

1300
01:16:24,116 --> 01:16:27,153
I have three people left
in my life that I care about,

1301
01:16:27,236 --> 01:16:29,466
and I let you guys down. No,

1302
01:16:29,556 --> 01:16:31,547
I'd rather go out
and make it go right

1303
01:16:31,636 --> 01:16:34,070
and die doing it than be
the asshole that screwed

1304
01:16:34,156 --> 01:16:36,112
- everything up.
- Hey, hey, Woody.

1305
01:16:36,196 --> 01:16:37,265
Where you going?

1306
01:16:43,956 --> 01:16:45,150
Woody!

1307
01:16:46,996 --> 01:16:49,066
Don't you know hogs
run in packs, baby?

1308
01:16:52,236 --> 01:16:53,828
We're still Wild Hogs?

1309
01:16:53,916 --> 01:16:56,635
- Wild Hogs, man.
- Wild Hogs.

1310
01:16:56,716 --> 01:16:59,435
Here' how it' gotta go.
I get up to 30 miles an hour.

1311
01:16:59,516 --> 01:17:02,986
Only tape holding that rope.
I'll get him by the trunk and grab him.

1312
01:17:03,076 --> 01:17:05,510
- I'll save Dudley.
- You'll need a distraction.

1313
01:17:05,596 --> 01:17:07,473
Together, guys.

1314
01:17:07,556 --> 01:17:09,865
Together we can do this.
And I'm ready.

1315
01:17:09,956 --> 01:17:11,309
I'm ready.

1316
01:17:11,396 --> 01:17:13,546
- What?
- What' wrong?

1317
01:17:13,636 --> 01:17:15,706
- It' gonna sound stupid.
- What?

1318
01:17:15,796 --> 01:17:17,832
Before I go,
I need one of you to yell,

1319
01:17:17,916 --> 01:17:21,033
"lt' the Golden Knight!"
It helps me get in the mood.

1320
01:17:21,116 --> 01:17:24,153
- Yeah, baby! He' back!
- It helps motivate me.

1321
01:17:26,196 --> 01:17:28,505
It' the Golden Knight.

1322
01:17:28,596 --> 01:17:30,632
With gusto, though.

1323
01:17:38,236 --> 01:17:40,431
- Now?
- Now!

1324
01:17:40,516 --> 01:17:42,871
Holy crap,
it' the Golden Knight!

1325
01:17:51,636 --> 01:17:54,150
Clear 'em out, boys!
Clear 'em out!

1326
01:17:54,236 --> 01:17:57,069
Del Fuego!
Come out and play, baby!

1327
01:17:57,156 --> 01:17:59,670
All day, baby! All day!

1328
01:17:59,756 --> 01:18:01,906
Thirty-five, 35, exactly 35!

1329
01:18:04,276 --> 01:18:06,995
Wild Hogs, baby! Wild Hogs!

1330
01:18:08,796 --> 01:18:12,152
OK, guys, slow down...
You're gonna...

1331
01:18:12,236 --> 01:18:13,874
Oh, no, no, no...

1332
01:18:17,916 --> 01:18:20,476
All right, I gotcha. I gotcha.

1333
01:18:21,476 --> 01:18:24,707
- You having fun?
- That was amazing!

1334
01:18:24,796 --> 01:18:26,946
The tape was supposed to break!

1335
01:18:29,716 --> 01:18:31,786
There it goes.

1336
01:18:31,876 --> 01:18:33,275
- Is there a problem?
- Come on. Come on!

1337
01:18:34,356 --> 01:18:36,745
You burned down Damien' bar,

1338
01:18:36,836 --> 01:18:38,986
you pull this little
circus act out here,

1339
01:18:39,076 --> 01:18:42,193
now you're gonna see what
it' like when you mess with us.

1340
01:18:42,276 --> 01:18:44,312
- That' right.
- Burn down the diner!

1341
01:18:44,396 --> 01:18:46,148
- Torch it!
- Look, look.

1342
01:18:46,236 --> 01:18:49,353
We can come up with the money,
I got a little bit in my savings.

1343
01:18:49,436 --> 01:18:52,155
It was my fault. I did it.
I cut the fuel lines.

1344
01:18:52,236 --> 01:18:54,431
Let me deal with it.
Let these guys go.

1345
01:18:54,516 --> 01:18:57,713
No! We're not gonna pay any money
and we're not calling the cops.

1346
01:18:59,436 --> 01:19:01,904
We're gonna stand here and fight.

1347
01:19:03,756 --> 01:19:05,075
You don't want our money.

1348
01:19:05,156 --> 01:19:07,192
What do you need money for?
You're free.

1349
01:19:07,276 --> 01:19:09,870
You're here to get what
you get from the townspeople

1350
01:19:09,956 --> 01:19:12,231
all the time, fear.
You're scary people.

1351
01:19:12,316 --> 01:19:14,147
People'll do anything to stay safe,

1352
01:19:14,236 --> 01:19:16,830
give up the biggest part
of their lives, adventure.

1353
01:19:16,916 --> 01:19:20,192
Let' have a little adventure.
Let' fight. Let' dance, huh?

1354
01:19:20,276 --> 01:19:22,267
- Let' do it!
- Enough' enough.

1355
01:19:22,356 --> 01:19:25,075
- Let' kick some Del Taco ass.
- Wait, wait, wait.

1356
01:19:25,156 --> 01:19:27,545
Do either of you guys
have a knife or scissors?

1357
01:19:27,636 --> 01:19:28,705
A naiI clipper?

1358
01:19:28,796 --> 01:19:30,627
All right, so how do we do this?

1359
01:19:30,716 --> 01:19:33,355
Like high school?
A little circle, huh?

1360
01:19:34,196 --> 01:19:36,664
Murdock, Red, Tiny. Four on four.

1361
01:19:38,236 --> 01:19:40,511
- Body or face, pretty boy?
- Not the face.

1362
01:19:54,236 --> 01:19:56,591
- I'll take him.
- Thank you!

1363
01:20:07,316 --> 01:20:09,352
- Trade back! Trade back.
- I got him.

1364
01:20:09,436 --> 01:20:11,996
It' not really fair,
you know. I'm kinda tied up.

1365
01:20:14,756 --> 01:20:16,747
You ever see a hook off the jab?

1366
01:20:16,836 --> 01:20:17,791
Huh? Bring it!

1367
01:20:25,596 --> 01:20:27,951
Let' have a little fun, baby.
Let' play.

1368
01:20:28,036 --> 01:20:30,311
Golden Glove, baby.

1369
01:20:35,916 --> 01:20:36,826
You hit my helmet.

1370
01:20:36,916 --> 01:20:38,668
Are you OK, man?
You hurt your hand?

1371
01:20:38,756 --> 01:20:40,155
That actually really hurt.

1372
01:20:45,476 --> 01:20:47,512
Yeah, good shot! Get off!

1373
01:20:48,876 --> 01:20:51,151
Uh-oh, no, no, no, no, don't...

1374
01:20:52,156 --> 01:20:53,271
- Throw sand!
- What?

1375
01:20:53,356 --> 01:20:55,108
- Throw sand!
- Yeah...

1376
01:20:56,476 --> 01:20:58,148
I didn't mean to aim there...

1377
01:21:01,276 --> 01:21:02,834
Nice.

1378
01:21:08,236 --> 01:21:10,955
Damn! I done knocked out my boy!

1379
01:21:11,036 --> 01:21:14,631
Come on. You all right?

1380
01:21:21,596 --> 01:21:23,234
Well, that was easy.

1381
01:21:26,036 --> 01:21:27,867
- Come on.
- Burn down the diner!

1382
01:21:27,956 --> 01:21:31,266
- Yeah!
- Come on!

1383
01:21:31,356 --> 01:21:32,948
Oh, good. You want some more?

1384
01:21:33,036 --> 01:21:37,348
Yeah, I got nothing to lose.
I got no wife. No job. No house.

1385
01:21:37,436 --> 01:21:40,667
I got my friends, though.
I got them till the end.

1386
01:21:42,356 --> 01:21:43,505
That' great!

1387
01:21:43,596 --> 01:21:46,429
You know, you know
what' so stupid about this?

1388
01:21:46,516 --> 01:21:49,747
We wanted to be like
you guys. What I see here,

1389
01:21:49,836 --> 01:21:52,669
is a bunch of grown men
whose biggest decision in life

1390
01:21:52,756 --> 01:21:54,951
is, "Sleeveless or... sleeveless?

1391
01:21:55,036 --> 01:21:57,630
Do I shit behind the rock,
or there by that bush?"

1392
01:21:57,716 --> 01:22:00,276
Grown men. This is pathetic.

1393
01:22:00,356 --> 01:22:01,948
You go ahead and kick our ass.

1394
01:22:02,036 --> 01:22:04,470
We're not the posers.
You guys are the posers.

1395
01:22:06,556 --> 01:22:11,152
Hey, do yourselves
a favour and stay down!

1396
01:22:11,236 --> 01:22:15,195
Twenty-five years of being yelled at.
Man, I ain't taking this...

1397
01:22:18,556 --> 01:22:21,832
And I got a girlfriend.
Punch that out of me, bitches.

1398
01:22:30,116 --> 01:22:31,435
Are we doing this?

1399
01:22:35,396 --> 01:22:37,068
- Let' do it.
- Yeah.

1400
01:22:37,156 --> 01:22:39,112
Come on.

1401
01:22:43,596 --> 01:22:46,508
- Come on.
- Come on.

1402
01:22:53,876 --> 01:22:55,309
You're kidding me, right?

1403
01:22:59,596 --> 01:23:01,075
What' wrong with you guys?

1404
01:23:03,076 --> 01:23:04,794
All right. You wanna keep going?

1405
01:23:05,956 --> 01:23:07,548
I don't think so.

1406
01:23:07,636 --> 01:23:12,312
You're done, Jack.
You Del Fuegos! You are done!

1407
01:23:12,396 --> 01:23:14,546
And we want you
out of our town, now.

1408
01:23:14,636 --> 01:23:17,196
- And who' "we"?
- All of us.

1409
01:23:20,836 --> 01:23:23,669
If four people could
stand up to a gang of bikers,

1410
01:23:23,756 --> 01:23:25,508
I guess we can too!

1411
01:23:25,596 --> 01:23:28,235
Well, we'll fight you and
the Children of the Corn too.

1412
01:23:28,316 --> 01:23:32,594
'Cause the Del Fuegos don't
back down! This is our highway.

1413
01:23:32,676 --> 01:23:35,144
And we're gonna
defend our highway.

1414
01:23:35,236 --> 01:23:36,305
Wrong, Jack.

1415
01:23:38,596 --> 01:23:40,985
It' my highway.

1416
01:23:41,076 --> 01:23:42,304
Blade.

1417
01:23:42,396 --> 01:23:44,193
Hi, Maggie.

1418
01:23:48,156 --> 01:23:50,670
- Bar burned down.
- Yeah.

1419
01:23:50,756 --> 01:23:53,634
These posers, these
four posers right here.

1420
01:23:53,716 --> 01:23:57,504
Four guys stand off 50 bikers...

1421
01:23:58,836 --> 01:24:01,555
...and they're the posers?
- Yeah. They burnt down

1422
01:24:01,636 --> 01:24:02,830
the bar that you built.

1423
01:24:02,916 --> 01:24:04,144
It was a shithole.

1424
01:24:04,236 --> 01:24:06,591
I insured it for
twice what it was worth.

1425
01:24:06,676 --> 01:24:08,075
The guys did me a favour.

1426
01:24:08,156 --> 01:24:10,795
We were just following
the code that you wrote.

1427
01:24:10,876 --> 01:24:13,071
Why do you think
I don't wear the colours?

1428
01:24:13,156 --> 01:24:14,714
Why do you think I ride alone?

1429
01:24:14,796 --> 01:24:16,707
You don't know about it anymore.

1430
01:24:16,796 --> 01:24:19,469
I think you all oughta get back
on your bikes and go out

1431
01:24:19,556 --> 01:24:23,435
and ride the highway untiI you
remember what riding' all about.

1432
01:24:23,756 --> 01:24:24,791
Let it go, Jack.

1433
01:24:37,716 --> 01:24:39,149
OK, Pop.

1434
01:24:40,916 --> 01:24:42,986
Takes after his mom.

1435
01:24:52,916 --> 01:24:55,146
Man, that was like level 12 of <i>Doom.</i>

1436
01:24:56,916 --> 01:25:00,192
The posers.
What do you guys call yourselves?

1437
01:25:00,276 --> 01:25:01,470
- I'm Woody.
- Bobby.

1438
01:25:01,556 --> 01:25:02,591
- I'm Doug.
- No, no.

1439
01:25:02,676 --> 01:25:04,314
- You riding together?
- Yeah.

1440
01:25:04,396 --> 01:25:06,148
- What do you...
- Hogs! Wild Hogs.

1441
01:25:06,236 --> 01:25:08,192
Wild... Yeah, Wild Hogs.

1442
01:25:09,356 --> 01:25:13,110
Well, Wild Hogs,
ride hard or stay home.

1443
01:25:13,196 --> 01:25:16,233
Oh, and, guys, lose the watches.

1444
01:25:19,636 --> 01:25:21,433
- Freedom, baby.
- We did it, babe.

1445
01:25:21,516 --> 01:25:24,474
All day. All day.

1446
01:25:24,556 --> 01:25:27,912
Hey! Hey! We're Wild Hogs!
The saga continues!

1447
01:25:42,716 --> 01:25:43,910
What the hell?

1448
01:25:43,996 --> 01:25:46,749
What in the world
is going on around here?

1449
01:25:48,156 --> 01:25:51,466
Plumbing conference?
Have you lost your mind?

1450
01:25:51,556 --> 01:25:52,625
Shut up, Doug!

1451
01:25:52,716 --> 01:25:55,628
Bobby, who are these people,
and where are we at?

1452
01:25:55,716 --> 01:25:57,069
Well, obviously, I'm not at

1453
01:25:57,156 --> 01:25:59,670
a plumbing conference
in Cleveland, baby.

1454
01:25:59,756 --> 01:26:00,711
Oh, really?

1455
01:26:00,796 --> 01:26:04,869
Baby, I've been fighting bikers all day,
this little Chinese dude bust my nose,

1456
01:26:04,956 --> 01:26:06,674
I've been slapping bulls...

1457
01:26:06,756 --> 01:26:10,066
Bobby, I don't give a damn
about you fighting no bulls!

1458
01:26:10,156 --> 01:26:13,626
Now, I want you to get your ass in
that van because we are going home.

1459
01:26:13,716 --> 01:26:15,911
I cannot believe you'd deceive me.

1460
01:26:15,996 --> 01:26:17,554
- Karen...
- No, I want...

1461
01:26:17,636 --> 01:26:20,946
Karen! Karen! Slow your roll.

1462
01:26:21,036 --> 01:26:24,346
Look, baby, I love you, OK?

1463
01:26:24,436 --> 01:26:26,631
But I'm tired of being talked at.

1464
01:26:26,716 --> 01:26:28,991
I don't talk at you! Bobby, I talk...

1465
01:26:29,076 --> 01:26:31,112
Karen, look at what you're doing now.

1466
01:26:31,196 --> 01:26:32,834
Come on. You feel me?

1467
01:26:32,916 --> 01:26:35,794
OK, baby, all right,
all right, I feel you.

1468
01:26:35,876 --> 01:26:37,946
Now I just need
you to show me some love.

1469
01:26:38,036 --> 01:26:39,913
Just a little bit of love.

1470
01:26:45,876 --> 01:26:47,468
That' scrumptious.

1471
01:26:47,556 --> 01:26:49,353
You got in a fight with bikers?

1472
01:26:49,436 --> 01:26:51,586
A bunch of 'em.
We chased 'em out of town!

1473
01:26:51,676 --> 01:26:54,110
There was 50 of them, it was...
It was something.

1474
01:26:54,196 --> 01:26:56,664
I gotta tell the guys
about this. That is awesome!

1475
01:26:56,756 --> 01:26:58,428
I'll be right back, OK?

1476
01:26:58,516 --> 01:27:00,154
Doug, are you sure you're OK?

1477
01:27:02,196 --> 01:27:03,595
Oh, your ribs, your ribs.

1478
01:27:03,676 --> 01:27:05,473
- Standing on my foot!
- Sorry!

1479
01:27:05,556 --> 01:27:07,035
I'll see you when I get back?

1480
01:27:08,676 --> 01:27:11,907
- I love you.
- I love you too, baby.

1481
01:27:11,996 --> 01:27:13,634
All right.

1482
01:27:19,236 --> 01:27:20,794
Get a room, baby.

1483
01:27:20,876 --> 01:27:22,628
Can we? Do we have time?

1484
01:27:23,356 --> 01:27:25,108
When are you coming back through?

1485
01:27:25,196 --> 01:27:26,868
A biker never knows.

1486
01:27:26,956 --> 01:27:30,073
Maybe a week, maybe a month...

1487
01:27:31,516 --> 01:27:33,950
Six days, ten hours, 27 minutes,

1488
01:27:34,036 --> 01:27:36,675
give or take six minutes
for wind resistance.

1489
01:27:40,916 --> 01:27:43,589
Well, I sure do wish
you guys would stick around.

1490
01:27:43,676 --> 01:27:46,031
We got some riding to do,
but thanks anyway.

1491
01:27:46,116 --> 01:27:49,586
Well, I'll just say it: You fellas
were a blessing to this place.

1492
01:27:49,676 --> 01:27:51,632
I mean, I'm not gonna
get all emotional

1493
01:27:51,716 --> 01:27:54,150
like old hamburger head
over here always...

1494
01:27:56,076 --> 01:27:57,668
What did you just call me?

1495
01:27:57,756 --> 01:28:00,554
See, when we walked up,
you were on my...

1496
01:28:00,636 --> 01:28:02,866
You son of a bitch!

1497
01:28:04,236 --> 01:28:06,591
Come on, Buck, I swear.
That' the first time!

1498
01:28:06,676 --> 01:28:09,031
- I don't wanna hear it!
- Honestly, you can't.

1499
01:28:09,116 --> 01:28:10,674
I heard that.

1500
01:28:10,756 --> 01:28:13,554
- Ready to ride, guys?
- Ready to ride, baby.

1501
01:28:13,636 --> 01:28:15,627
Let' see what the West Coast has.

1502
01:28:15,716 --> 01:28:17,991
Think there'll be
any trouble along the way?

1503
01:28:18,076 --> 01:28:19,748
Oh, I hope so.

1504
01:28:19,836 --> 01:28:21,667
Yeah, I like the way you think.

1505
01:28:21,756 --> 01:28:23,667
I like the way you think.

1506
01:28:40,516 --> 01:28:42,825
I'm OK! I just hurt my face.

1507
01:29:36,196 --> 01:29:37,675
Hey, we did it!

1508
01:29:38,556 --> 01:29:40,547
Do you believe this?

1509
01:29:44,876 --> 01:29:45,831
Hello!

1510
01:29:45,916 --> 01:29:47,349
My goodness.

1511
01:29:47,436 --> 01:29:48,949
Oh, no. Oh, no.

1512
01:29:54,276 --> 01:29:55,595
Sorry, sorry.

1513
01:29:57,516 --> 01:30:00,030
Two thousand miles,
but I finally got it.

1514
01:30:00,116 --> 01:30:01,834
'Bout time, rookie!

1515
01:30:04,596 --> 01:30:07,986
- Lotta distractions.
- California, baby!

1516
01:30:25,956 --> 01:30:28,390
Welcome back to <i>Extreme</i>
<i>Makeover: Home Edition.</i>

1517
01:30:28,476 --> 01:30:31,036
Now, we've met
some incredible families,

1518
01:30:31,116 --> 01:30:34,267
but this could be the saddest story
we've... we've ever seen.

1519
01:30:34,356 --> 01:30:36,631
This family has lost everything.

1520
01:30:36,716 --> 01:30:39,628
They've lost their home,
they've lost their history,

1521
01:30:39,716 --> 01:30:41,229
they've lost their heritage.

1522
01:30:41,316 --> 01:30:43,784
But this week, we've done
something about that.

1523
01:30:43,876 --> 01:30:46,993
So let' welcome back...
the Del Fuego family!

1524
01:30:52,916 --> 01:30:54,269
Jack, two months ago, man,

1525
01:30:54,356 --> 01:30:56,233
you lost the only home
you ever knew.

1526
01:30:56,316 --> 01:30:59,069
Thanks to a call from your friends,
the Wild Hogs,

1527
01:30:59,156 --> 01:31:02,034
- we built you a new one.
- That' so great.

1528
01:31:02,116 --> 01:31:05,074
They... He didn't have to
mention us. That'... Oh, man.

1529
01:31:05,156 --> 01:31:06,794
<i>So you guys know what to say?</i>

1530
01:31:06,876 --> 01:31:10,107
Say it with me!
Bus driver, move that bus!

1531
01:31:25,396 --> 01:31:28,069
Usually we have some
pretty emotional reactions,

1532
01:31:28,156 --> 01:31:30,670
but Jack, you know, wow.

1533
01:31:31,676 --> 01:31:34,986
I'm not sure what
was going on with Jack.

1534
01:31:36,636 --> 01:31:38,672
Thanks to Sears
and local breweries

1535
01:31:38,756 --> 01:31:43,705
who provided state-of-the-art taps
and a year' supply of free beer!

1536
01:31:46,396 --> 01:31:49,149
Oh, my God! That is so cool!

1537
01:31:49,236 --> 01:31:50,908
That is so cool!

1538
01:31:50,996 --> 01:31:53,351
Cool as a parking lot
made out of real leather?

1539
01:31:53,876 --> 01:31:57,027
That is so rad! That is so rad!

1540
01:32:00,996 --> 01:32:04,511
The bar was my home.
When it went down,

1541
01:32:04,596 --> 01:32:07,315
I felt... homeless.

1542
01:32:08,916 --> 01:32:11,908
Del Fuegos,
go check out your new home!

1543
01:32:16,996 --> 01:32:20,591
You're talking about a bunch of guys
that grew up in broken homes.

1544
01:32:20,676 --> 01:32:22,507
They really didn't even have a home.

1545
01:32:22,596 --> 01:32:24,791
And now they've got one.
With a bidet in it.

1546
01:32:24,876 --> 01:32:26,787
Thank you!

1547
01:32:31,796 --> 01:32:34,708
We love our bar.
Thanks, America!

1548
01:32:37,196 --> 01:32:39,107
Wild Hogs!