1 00:01:00,593 --> 00:01:02,026 Look at you. 2 00:01:02,595 --> 00:01:05,689 Look over here. Okay, great, great. - All right, let's do this. 3 00:01:05,765 --> 00:01:07,460 Do you like my new dress? Okay, ready? 4 00:01:07,534 --> 00:01:09,468 All right, say "cheese." 5 00:01:09,536 --> 00:01:12,198 Cheese... Oh, wait. Excuse me, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. 6 00:01:13,239 --> 00:01:16,800 Maybe it's just me, but can I just say, why "cheese"? 7 00:01:16,876 --> 00:01:20,209 I know it's not your fault, obviously you didn't make it up, but please, 8 00:01:20,280 --> 00:01:22,180 it makes us look like pod people. 9 00:01:22,248 --> 00:01:23,909 How about something more snapshot like? 10 00:01:23,983 --> 00:01:25,211 Au naturel. 11 00:01:31,591 --> 00:01:33,786 That's good. I think we've got it, though, don't you? 12 00:01:33,860 --> 00:01:35,020 I'm living the dream over here. 13 00:01:35,095 --> 00:01:38,656 Honey, did you see that young man Cousin Dougy brought with him? 14 00:01:38,731 --> 00:01:40,289 He's been staring at you all afternoon. 15 00:01:40,366 --> 00:01:43,062 Don't destroy the cake. I used fresh tangerines. 16 00:01:43,136 --> 00:01:44,626 Can you taste it in the frosting? 17 00:01:44,704 --> 00:01:48,071 Has he really? It's delicious. Yeah, God, his eyes are gorgeous. 18 00:01:48,141 --> 00:01:50,541 They're kind. And they're gorgeous. Go on. 19 00:01:50,610 --> 00:01:52,077 I'll go over. You will? 20 00:01:52,145 --> 00:01:53,476 Yeah. Okay. All right. 21 00:01:53,546 --> 00:01:54,843 Oh, but, honey. 22 00:01:54,914 --> 00:01:57,314 Just don't do that thing you do. What thing, Mom? 23 00:01:57,383 --> 00:01:59,647 Oh, you know that little thing. It's no big deal. 24 00:01:59,719 --> 00:02:01,949 That, you know, when you're insecure, you're self-conscious, 25 00:02:02,021 --> 00:02:04,387 that little very loud, nervous laugh? 26 00:02:04,457 --> 00:02:05,822 Honey, it's adorable, but... 27 00:02:05,892 --> 00:02:08,622 Oh, God, look, there she goes. Oh, look. 28 00:02:08,695 --> 00:02:09,957 Oh, I know, we see it. 29 00:02:10,029 --> 00:02:11,929 She only buttons the part she can see in the mirror. 30 00:02:11,998 --> 00:02:16,059 At least she shaves more than the front of her legs now, she's got almost the whole... 31 00:02:16,136 --> 00:02:17,467 Hi. Hi. 32 00:02:17,537 --> 00:02:19,334 Okay, it's going... It's okay. 33 00:02:19,405 --> 00:02:20,394 Yeah. 34 00:02:21,407 --> 00:02:22,533 35 00:02:22,976 --> 00:02:24,500 Uh-oh. Kiss of death. 36 00:02:26,279 --> 00:02:27,541 37 00:02:29,482 --> 00:02:30,506 38 00:02:30,583 --> 00:02:32,380 It was so... - You're beautiful. 39 00:02:32,452 --> 00:02:34,647 Are we going to do the picture? - All right, let's do this. 40 00:02:34,721 --> 00:02:35,915 Let's just do it, okay? Okay. 41 00:02:35,989 --> 00:02:37,217 This time I think we should pose. 42 00:02:37,290 --> 00:02:38,382 I think we should pose for one. 43 00:02:38,458 --> 00:02:41,655 Oh, wait a minute, wait. Hold on for just one second, okay? Where's Mil? 44 00:02:41,728 --> 00:02:44,219 Oh, God, how did we lose her? 45 00:02:44,297 --> 00:02:46,390 Milly? Where are you? 46 00:02:48,535 --> 00:02:52,232 I'm upstairs, with Uncle Harold's nephew. 47 00:02:52,305 --> 00:02:54,239 The politically-active open-hearted journalist? 48 00:02:54,307 --> 00:02:56,639 Mil, let me get your sisters in on this. 49 00:02:56,709 --> 00:02:57,903 Maggie, what do you do? 50 00:02:57,977 --> 00:02:59,035 You hit "Speaker," Mom. 51 00:02:59,112 --> 00:03:00,272 No, no, I know. Okay, I knew that, but... 52 00:03:00,346 --> 00:03:01,938 No, but the one that says "speak." 53 00:03:02,015 --> 00:03:04,245 Mil, we're here, we're all here. - Hi. 54 00:03:04,317 --> 00:03:05,545 So how's it going? 55 00:03:05,618 --> 00:03:07,779 It's good. It's good. 56 00:03:07,854 --> 00:03:09,651 Okay. The only thing is 57 00:03:11,724 --> 00:03:14,158 I think he may have a hot dog with a bun. 58 00:03:15,161 --> 00:03:17,061 Are you having a picnic? What? 59 00:03:17,130 --> 00:03:19,655 No. Uncircumcised is back in. 60 00:03:19,732 --> 00:03:22,496 You know that guy I dated before Derek, he had a... 61 00:03:22,569 --> 00:03:25,037 And I preferred it because it was so much more dramatic. 62 00:03:25,104 --> 00:03:26,537 When it finally made its appearance, you were like... 63 00:03:26,606 --> 00:03:28,073 What's in there? 64 00:03:28,141 --> 00:03:29,768 Just stop it for a second. Just a little... 65 00:03:29,842 --> 00:03:31,776 This is your wedding. All right. 66 00:03:31,844 --> 00:03:35,746 Honey, just remember, he's accomplished and he's considerate. 67 00:03:35,815 --> 00:03:38,613 And don't forget, you have one breast smaller than the other. 68 00:03:38,685 --> 00:03:41,381 Thank you, Mom. God. 69 00:03:42,355 --> 00:03:44,949 Wait, didn't he get back together with his wife? 70 00:03:45,024 --> 00:03:46,491 Oh, no. 71 00:03:48,027 --> 00:03:51,895 Well, Milly, congratulations on your first wedding. 72 00:03:52,899 --> 00:03:55,766 Let's hope it's the first of many. Cheers. 73 00:03:57,870 --> 00:03:59,235 All right. 74 00:04:00,506 --> 00:04:03,339 A little thyme, remember? For hope. 75 00:04:03,409 --> 00:04:06,139 And they say lavender for remembrance. 76 00:04:06,212 --> 00:04:07,907 But my grandmother preferred marigolds 77 00:04:07,981 --> 00:04:11,348 'cause she said it made you remember only the good stuff. 78 00:04:12,719 --> 00:04:16,655 I feel like making love to you 79 00:04:18,825 --> 00:04:21,123 My God. All right, we gotta cut off the champagne 80 00:04:21,194 --> 00:04:23,594 and get some food in their stomachs before there's an encore. 81 00:04:23,663 --> 00:04:26,598 Let's go ahead and get the entr�es ready, all right? 82 00:04:26,666 --> 00:04:28,031 Thank you. 84 00:04:32,605 --> 00:04:33,970 Not a good time. 85 00:04:34,274 --> 00:04:37,175 Honey, I was just thinking about that brilliant 86 00:04:37,243 --> 00:04:40,872 but went-overboard- with-the-teeth-bleaching flute player from Ohio. 87 00:04:41,114 --> 00:04:43,981 Yup, he actually stopped by work to surprise me. 88 00:04:44,050 --> 00:04:45,210 Hey. - How sweet. 89 00:04:45,285 --> 00:04:47,845 He's getting to know my staff as we speak. 90 00:04:47,920 --> 00:04:50,650 I guess I was wrong. I mean, I had him pegged 91 00:04:50,723 --> 00:04:53,157 for one of those guys who wants you till he's got you 92 00:04:53,226 --> 00:04:55,490 and then doesn't think twice about sleeping with your best friend. 93 00:04:55,561 --> 00:04:57,495 You know, that kind of guy. 94 00:04:57,563 --> 00:05:00,498 No, no, Mom. He's great. Beautiful, beautiful. 95 00:05:00,566 --> 00:05:04,297 You know, Mom, I gotta go. We're about to serve the entr�es. 96 00:05:04,370 --> 00:05:06,429 And I wore those shoes that we just bought, 97 00:05:06,506 --> 00:05:08,303 no wonder they were on sale, my feet are killing me. 98 00:05:08,374 --> 00:05:10,069 I'm gonna call you when I get home, okay? I love you, bye. 99 00:05:16,683 --> 00:05:17,843 Milly. 100 00:06:04,797 --> 00:06:06,822 You have no messages. 101 00:06:11,037 --> 00:06:12,061 Oh! 102 00:06:12,138 --> 00:06:13,730 That's it, Cooper. 103 00:07:11,264 --> 00:07:14,131 Whose idea was this? A Korean spa? 104 00:07:14,200 --> 00:07:15,667 Mine. Oy. 105 00:07:15,735 --> 00:07:18,101 Ma, why do you wear the high-tops? 106 00:07:18,171 --> 00:07:19,763 I just got these. What's wrong with these? 107 00:07:19,839 --> 00:07:21,170 They're just kind of depressing. 108 00:07:21,240 --> 00:07:24,300 They're kind of something you would wear in a hospital. 109 00:07:24,610 --> 00:07:27,078 Wait a sec, I'll have you know, young ladies, 110 00:07:27,146 --> 00:07:29,876 that this underwear enhances the female form, 111 00:07:29,949 --> 00:07:33,146 highlighting the elegance of the waist and making the legs appear longer, 112 00:07:33,219 --> 00:07:35,585 instead of the... Well, I'm sorry to say this, 113 00:07:35,655 --> 00:07:38,715 but the awful, you know, foreshortening aspect of a thong, 114 00:07:38,791 --> 00:07:41,760 which breaks up the body disproportionately. 115 00:07:41,828 --> 00:07:44,922 Mom, come on, for your 60th birthday, we're gonna break you down 116 00:07:44,997 --> 00:07:46,294 and we're gonna buy you something beautiful, 117 00:07:46,365 --> 00:07:47,923 something that Grandma Moses would not wear. 118 00:07:48,000 --> 00:07:49,831 Yes, you are. And speaking of your birthday, 119 00:07:49,902 --> 00:07:52,029 we've talked about possibly, 120 00:07:52,104 --> 00:07:53,969 like, a really small party. We feel you should have a party. 121 00:07:54,040 --> 00:07:55,132 Not a big one. Just intimate. 122 00:07:55,208 --> 00:07:56,197 Elegant... Something very sophisticated. 123 00:07:56,275 --> 00:07:57,469 Because it's a really big milestone for you, Mom. 124 00:07:57,543 --> 00:07:59,841 No. Misses, no. Absolutely no. Misses... 125 00:07:59,912 --> 00:08:02,904 No, I'm not going to talk about it, we're not going to think about it 126 00:08:02,982 --> 00:08:06,713 and certainly I'm not gonna not celebrate the fact that my life is basically over. 127 00:08:06,786 --> 00:08:09,152 Ma. But I did find a recipe 128 00:08:09,222 --> 00:08:12,089 for a butterscotch buttercream cake that is to die for. 129 00:08:12,158 --> 00:08:14,388 We got her. Totally got her. 130 00:08:14,460 --> 00:08:17,088 Massage naked. Take all clothes off. 131 00:08:17,163 --> 00:08:19,495 No. Not now, pal. No. 132 00:08:19,565 --> 00:08:21,260 No. 134 00:08:24,504 --> 00:08:25,869 Whose idea was this? 135 00:08:25,938 --> 00:08:28,429 Which one of you could possibly think that I would ever enjoy this? 136 00:08:28,508 --> 00:08:31,409 No, it was not. It was so you. 137 00:08:31,477 --> 00:08:33,001 Just you wait. 138 00:08:33,279 --> 00:08:34,678 No. 139 00:08:35,381 --> 00:08:36,678 Hi, babe. 140 00:08:43,956 --> 00:08:45,116 Okay. 142 00:08:59,272 --> 00:09:00,967 Honey, I'm worried about you. 143 00:09:01,040 --> 00:09:04,271 It's not sad sobbing. I promise, Mom, I'm fine, I'm fine. 144 00:09:04,343 --> 00:09:08,370 It's just the pressure point reflex thing. 146 00:09:09,782 --> 00:09:10,771 Pardon? 147 00:09:10,850 --> 00:09:12,044 What kind of oil would you like? 148 00:09:12,118 --> 00:09:14,018 Oh, wakana oh yulike to you too. 149 00:09:14,086 --> 00:09:17,249 Mom. What? It's a greeting. 152 00:09:25,865 --> 00:09:28,356 Hey, wait. What are you... What are you... 153 00:09:28,534 --> 00:09:32,231 What are you doing here now? Hey, that's the head. That's... 154 00:09:32,505 --> 00:09:35,372 Soft to hard. Soft to hard. 156 00:09:37,009 --> 00:09:38,567 God damn it. 157 00:09:41,047 --> 00:09:42,480 Oh, my God. 158 00:09:48,020 --> 00:09:51,421 Girls, she's not back with Rafferty, is she? 159 00:09:51,490 --> 00:09:53,822 She doesn't want to talk about it, Mom. 160 00:09:53,893 --> 00:09:57,727 I knew it. I thought we got rid of that pathologically ambivalent narcissist 161 00:09:57,797 --> 00:10:00,265 three years ago when he almost stood you up at Mae's wedding. 162 00:10:00,333 --> 00:10:01,732 Well, you know what, Mom? 163 00:10:01,801 --> 00:10:03,063 He's never gonna stand me up again 164 00:10:03,135 --> 00:10:06,195 because he's been sleeping with my ex-boyfriend. 165 00:10:06,272 --> 00:10:07,466 Oh, my God. - Oh, God. 166 00:10:07,540 --> 00:10:09,269 I could kill him. - Oh, God. 168 00:10:19,418 --> 00:10:21,443 You deserve somebody who wants you, 169 00:10:21,520 --> 00:10:23,681 somebody who's as good and as kind as you are. 170 00:10:23,756 --> 00:10:26,020 Why do you always have to put me down? 171 00:10:26,092 --> 00:10:28,219 I'm not putting you... Yes, you are. 172 00:10:28,294 --> 00:10:30,489 Love is supposed to make you feel good about yourself. 173 00:10:30,563 --> 00:10:31,928 You shouldn't have to settle for crumbs. 174 00:10:31,998 --> 00:10:34,865 Okay, okay. I know. I'm an idiot, okay? 175 00:10:34,934 --> 00:10:36,902 I'm done. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. - No, no. No. 177 00:10:42,041 --> 00:10:44,874 All right. You're the psychologist in the family. 178 00:10:44,944 --> 00:10:46,605 What do you think we should do about your sister? 179 00:10:46,679 --> 00:10:49,375 I swear, with men, she's like psychotic flypaper. 180 00:10:49,448 --> 00:10:53,043 They're either gay, married, unavailable or out of their minds. 181 00:10:53,119 --> 00:10:56,748 No, Mom, you have to leave her alone. You have to quit making her so insecure. 182 00:10:56,822 --> 00:10:58,687 She had the least amount of time with Dad 183 00:10:58,758 --> 00:11:01,318 who wasn't exactly a great male role model. 184 00:11:01,394 --> 00:11:04,659 And stop being a helicopter, Mom, you're hovering. 185 00:11:07,633 --> 00:11:09,726 You're right, you're right. 187 00:11:11,103 --> 00:11:12,161 I'm gonna back off, 188 00:11:12,238 --> 00:11:15,207 I'm gonna give her some space to sort things out for herself. 189 00:11:15,274 --> 00:11:16,400 Good. 190 00:11:17,610 --> 00:11:18,702 Yeah. 191 00:11:19,979 --> 00:11:21,276 If only I could choose for her. 192 00:11:21,347 --> 00:11:22,405 No. No. That is so... 193 00:11:22,481 --> 00:11:24,176 That is so Fiddler on the Roof. 194 00:11:24,250 --> 00:11:25,615 Your parents didn't choose for you. 195 00:11:25,685 --> 00:11:26,811 Yeah, but maybe they should have. 196 00:11:26,886 --> 00:11:30,322 You know what I think? I think you're fixating on her 197 00:11:30,389 --> 00:11:33,415 to avoid dealing with this very big birthday you have coming up. 198 00:11:33,492 --> 00:11:35,426 I am not fixating on her. 199 00:11:35,494 --> 00:11:38,327 Is it crazy for me to want her to have 200 00:11:38,397 --> 00:11:41,389 one healthy relationship in her life? 201 00:11:41,467 --> 00:11:43,935 I mean, come on, if she keeps up this pattern 202 00:11:44,003 --> 00:11:45,300 of wrong choice after wrong choice... 203 00:11:45,371 --> 00:11:47,805 I mean, okay, one thing when you're in your 20s, 204 00:11:47,873 --> 00:11:50,706 but 20 years later, it's not so pretty. 205 00:11:52,645 --> 00:11:53,873 Maggie? 206 00:11:54,814 --> 00:11:56,179 I don't... 207 00:11:57,516 --> 00:11:59,916 I don't want her to end up alone. 208 00:12:00,953 --> 00:12:03,148 You know what I realize? 209 00:12:03,222 --> 00:12:06,749 I give up the search. I don't need anybody. I mean, look at Mom. 210 00:12:06,826 --> 00:12:09,488 She's been single most of her adult life and she's lived a great life. 211 00:12:09,562 --> 00:12:13,362 So you know what? I'm going to be just like you, Mom. 213 00:12:16,035 --> 00:12:17,627 Just like you. 214 00:12:20,473 --> 00:12:23,101 Milly, you are gonna thank me for this later. 215 00:12:24,110 --> 00:12:25,270 Okay. 216 00:12:26,545 --> 00:12:28,206 "Adult Friend Finder." 217 00:12:28,280 --> 00:12:32,910 "Over 14 million members." Well, that's a very good sign. 218 00:12:32,985 --> 00:12:34,646 I like how they use the word "friend." 219 00:12:34,720 --> 00:12:37,780 Friendship is the cornerstone of any good relationship. 222 00:12:44,663 --> 00:12:48,724 Oh, my God. Oh, sorry, Coop. I'm sorry, honey. Wait, okay. Wait. Shoot. 223 00:12:48,801 --> 00:12:51,167 Eat my dick. 224 00:12:51,937 --> 00:12:57,000 No, no, no. Be quiet, okay? Gone, gone. All goney, right? Gone. 225 00:13:01,147 --> 00:13:02,444 Cooper, quiet. 227 00:13:04,817 --> 00:13:07,285 Gateway customer support. May I help you? 228 00:13:07,486 --> 00:13:09,477 Mr. Online Support? 229 00:13:09,555 --> 00:13:13,286 Yeah, no. What's happened is my computer has apparently frozen. 230 00:13:13,359 --> 00:13:17,261 No, I was just doing a little bit of pre-Christmas online shopping. 231 00:13:17,329 --> 00:13:19,797 Why do you need to know what site I'm on? 233 00:13:21,200 --> 00:13:23,760 Oh, my God. 234 00:13:27,139 --> 00:13:28,572 God darn. 235 00:13:28,641 --> 00:13:32,042 Hello, is this We Match 4 You? 236 00:13:34,647 --> 00:13:39,209 "Let me preface this ad by saying if you are a nut job, pervert or fruitcake, move on. 237 00:13:39,285 --> 00:13:42,584 "Nudists, mama's boys, the sexually confused need not apply." 238 00:13:42,655 --> 00:13:47,354 "Anarchists, xenophobes, philistines, masochists, sexists, bigots not welcome." 239 00:13:47,426 --> 00:13:51,089 I know it's $5 a word. No, well, don't worry. 240 00:13:51,597 --> 00:13:52,825 I'm not that talky. 241 00:13:52,898 --> 00:13:56,493 So let's just take it from page two. "Chronically itchy." 242 00:13:56,569 --> 00:13:59,868 "I'm looking for someone with a steady job who knows the value of work. 243 00:13:59,939 --> 00:14:03,670 "That does not exclude the independently wealthy." 244 00:14:04,677 --> 00:14:07,703 Okay, hope that goes out... 245 00:14:07,780 --> 00:14:11,443 Polka dots. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, I like it. 246 00:14:13,085 --> 00:14:14,052 I like it, I like it. 247 00:14:27,967 --> 00:14:28,956 Oh. 248 00:14:32,738 --> 00:14:36,834 Hi. You must be Daphne Wilder. It's so nice to meet you. 249 00:14:36,909 --> 00:14:38,934 Let's date your daughter. 250 00:14:40,379 --> 00:14:42,677 I'll just dig in real quick, 'cause I'm hypoglycemic, 251 00:14:42,748 --> 00:14:46,445 'cause otherwise my blood sugar hits the ground and... You know? Okay. 252 00:14:46,518 --> 00:14:50,716 I was just wondering what you think the cornerstone of any good relationship is? 253 00:14:51,357 --> 00:14:52,688 What is in there? 254 00:14:52,758 --> 00:14:55,852 So why don't you just free associate, okay? I say marriage, you say... 255 00:14:55,928 --> 00:14:56,986 I say marriage. 256 00:14:57,062 --> 00:14:59,257 No, no, I say marriage and... I say marriage. 257 00:14:59,331 --> 00:15:01,458 Right, but that's not what I meant. I meant that... 258 00:15:01,533 --> 00:15:02,557 I... I... 259 00:15:02,635 --> 00:15:03,795 Me. Me. 260 00:15:03,869 --> 00:15:04,995 261 00:15:05,070 --> 00:15:09,063 I have a slight allergy to dander and nut meats. 262 00:15:09,909 --> 00:15:11,900 Okay, done, thank you very much. 263 00:15:11,977 --> 00:15:13,376 It's been wonderful meeting you. Thank you. 264 00:15:13,445 --> 00:15:17,279 Appreciate it, yeah. Right. Thank you very much. Okay, yeah. 265 00:15:17,349 --> 00:15:19,214 If I say marriage, then what do you say? 266 00:15:19,285 --> 00:15:20,582 Vera Wang. 267 00:15:31,497 --> 00:15:32,486 Your name is? 268 00:15:32,564 --> 00:15:34,031 Louie. Huey. 269 00:15:34,300 --> 00:15:35,892 270 00:15:40,072 --> 00:15:41,801 I've already got a woody. 271 00:15:43,442 --> 00:15:44,431 Uh! 272 00:15:47,112 --> 00:15:49,342 How old did you say you were? 273 00:15:53,619 --> 00:15:54,881 274 00:15:55,754 --> 00:15:58,348 My name is Dr. Iris McDunna. 275 00:15:58,424 --> 00:16:00,915 I'm sorry, I'm right in the middle here, Iris. I know. 276 00:16:00,993 --> 00:16:03,860 I read your ad, "You'll know me by my polka dots." 277 00:16:03,929 --> 00:16:08,059 I'm a licensed psychologist and I wanted to offer you my services. 278 00:16:08,133 --> 00:16:11,000 I wanted to suggest that as a mother, 279 00:16:11,070 --> 00:16:15,302 you attend, free of charge, one of my Letting Go seminars. 280 00:16:15,374 --> 00:16:18,036 Hi. I think we were supposed to meet now. 281 00:16:20,813 --> 00:16:22,781 Yeah. Oh, that's... 282 00:16:22,848 --> 00:16:24,213 Right. 283 00:16:25,017 --> 00:16:26,848 Right. That is so... 284 00:16:26,919 --> 00:16:30,047 Iris, I'm so sorry. I can't afford to be rude. 285 00:16:30,622 --> 00:16:32,556 I'll leave you my card. 286 00:16:32,858 --> 00:16:35,588 Thank you so terribly much. 287 00:16:37,496 --> 00:16:41,227 God. Thank you, whoever you are. I'll have another. Another. 288 00:16:41,800 --> 00:16:43,859 I really don't think I can't get through another one of these 289 00:16:43,936 --> 00:16:45,563 without being heavily medicated. 290 00:16:45,637 --> 00:16:47,662 That bad, huh? Bad? 291 00:16:47,840 --> 00:16:49,330 Yeah. Like... 292 00:16:50,009 --> 00:16:51,408 293 00:16:51,877 --> 00:16:52,969 Wow. 294 00:16:54,947 --> 00:16:57,415 And I like that you're going for a younger guy. 295 00:16:57,483 --> 00:16:59,041 Me? 296 00:17:01,020 --> 00:17:03,386 No, no, no. That ship's docked. 297 00:17:03,455 --> 00:17:06,982 No. No, this is for my daughter. 298 00:17:10,429 --> 00:17:13,227 Let me get this straight. So you're meeting these guys for her? 299 00:17:13,298 --> 00:17:14,322 Uh-huh. 300 00:17:14,400 --> 00:17:16,391 So she's cool with you doing this for her, then. 301 00:17:16,468 --> 00:17:18,766 Maybe you should just go play your guitar. 302 00:17:18,837 --> 00:17:20,998 She doesn't know, does she? 303 00:17:21,240 --> 00:17:22,332 Look. 304 00:17:24,276 --> 00:17:28,178 I wouldn't be here if it weren't for the fact that Milly is... 305 00:17:28,247 --> 00:17:29,737 She's at a crossroads in her life. 306 00:17:29,815 --> 00:17:32,283 Another hard left and I really... 307 00:17:32,351 --> 00:17:37,254 She's like this person who's too sensitive. You know what I mean? 308 00:17:37,823 --> 00:17:40,724 She's an innocent. She's a pushover. 309 00:17:42,361 --> 00:17:43,953 I'm usually not this in-the-muck-of-it. 310 00:17:44,029 --> 00:17:47,465 I mean, actually, I consider myself a reasonably sane mother. 311 00:17:47,533 --> 00:17:50,001 Well, yeah, it is a crazy love, though. 312 00:17:50,069 --> 00:17:53,869 I mean, who's to say I wouldn't do the same for my own kid? 313 00:17:54,807 --> 00:17:55,796 Mmm. 314 00:17:55,941 --> 00:17:59,274 Excuse me. I'm Jason Grant. I don't mean to interrupt. 315 00:17:59,344 --> 00:18:00,402 I've been waiting over by the bar, 316 00:18:00,479 --> 00:18:03,937 but I only have so much time before I have to get back to work. 317 00:18:07,386 --> 00:18:09,320 I just wanted to ask you about your family. 318 00:18:09,388 --> 00:18:14,621 Yeah, well, my dad is an engineer who was always a closet architect. 319 00:18:15,461 --> 00:18:18,794 And I grew up with a love of old buildings. I know what you mean. 320 00:18:19,131 --> 00:18:22,726 So I suppose I became the architect that he always dreamed of being. 321 00:18:22,801 --> 00:18:25,235 Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. 322 00:18:26,505 --> 00:18:28,336 Oh, thank you, dear Lord. 323 00:18:29,741 --> 00:18:31,003 Can I order you something? 324 00:18:31,076 --> 00:18:34,443 You know, actually it turns out I'm so not hungry at all. 325 00:18:34,513 --> 00:18:38,472 Let me get you the funghi chitarrina misto. It's the best-kept secret in the city. 326 00:18:38,550 --> 00:18:39,812 Can we have two orders of that, please? 327 00:18:39,885 --> 00:18:42,877 And a bottle of the Castellare Chianti Poggiale. 328 00:18:43,489 --> 00:18:46,151 If you insist, huh? No, I do, I do. 329 00:18:48,327 --> 00:18:52,263 Do you mind my asking why a man like you hasn't found a woman already? 330 00:18:52,931 --> 00:18:55,161 Well, I'll admit I'm a bit of a workaholic. 331 00:18:55,234 --> 00:18:57,293 It's a very important time in my career right now. 332 00:18:57,369 --> 00:19:00,429 I've found women but just not the right one. 333 00:19:00,506 --> 00:19:02,440 A lot of great "almosts" out there. 334 00:19:02,508 --> 00:19:04,738 Oh, yeah, a lot of "almosts." 335 00:19:05,577 --> 00:19:06,703 Yeah. 336 00:19:07,079 --> 00:19:10,742 337 00:19:10,816 --> 00:19:12,340 You speak Italian, huh? 338 00:19:12,417 --> 00:19:14,408 No, I fake Italian. 339 00:19:14,486 --> 00:19:15,646 I'd really love to learn it. 340 00:19:15,721 --> 00:19:17,951 You know, Milly happens to be a phenomenal cook. 341 00:19:18,023 --> 00:19:20,082 She's always wanted to take a cooking tour of Italy. 342 00:19:20,159 --> 00:19:22,855 Oh, wow, I was gonna go there this fall. Really? 343 00:19:22,928 --> 00:19:24,418 But it's a crazy time for me right now. 344 00:19:24,496 --> 00:19:27,693 My company is celebrating their tenth anniversary. 345 00:19:27,766 --> 00:19:28,755 Oh. 346 00:19:29,067 --> 00:19:30,967 You're gonna need a caterer then. 347 00:19:31,036 --> 00:19:34,164 I mean, those kinds of occasions should be marked, don't you think? 348 00:19:36,508 --> 00:19:39,966 You are good. So James Bond. Yes. 349 00:19:40,512 --> 00:19:43,174 Well, it was a pleasure to meet you, Daphne Wilder. 350 00:19:43,248 --> 00:19:46,240 Well, Jason, my pleasure. 351 00:19:46,318 --> 00:19:48,445 Gotta love a woman in polka dots. 352 00:19:48,520 --> 00:19:51,387 Not everyone can pull it off. Thank you. 353 00:19:53,425 --> 00:19:54,449 Bye. 354 00:19:54,526 --> 00:19:55,857 Bye-bye. Bye. 355 00:19:59,831 --> 00:20:01,822 Oh, my God. 356 00:20:02,935 --> 00:20:04,266 Oh, yes. 357 00:20:05,003 --> 00:20:06,630 And the winner is? 358 00:20:06,939 --> 00:20:10,375 Duh. Hands down, bachelor number 17. 359 00:20:10,442 --> 00:20:11,932 Him? Yes. 360 00:20:12,411 --> 00:20:13,901 Oh, I don't trust that guy. 361 00:20:13,979 --> 00:20:15,913 That guy was playing you like a slide guitar. 362 00:20:15,981 --> 00:20:17,448 He was not. 363 00:20:17,516 --> 00:20:20,314 He's a very stable, responsible, mature young man. 364 00:20:20,385 --> 00:20:21,750 He has empty eyes. 365 00:20:21,820 --> 00:20:24,914 They were not empty. And who am I supposed to choose anyway, huh? 366 00:20:24,990 --> 00:20:27,982 Who do you think is better? Me. 367 00:20:28,393 --> 00:20:29,553 What? 368 00:20:30,629 --> 00:20:32,153 I like you. 369 00:20:32,231 --> 00:20:35,723 And I have an odd instinct that I'd like her too. Maybe I should meet her. 370 00:20:35,801 --> 00:20:38,964 Let me be perfectly honest with you, okay? 371 00:20:40,138 --> 00:20:42,766 You're a very charming guy, irresistible, in fact. 372 00:20:42,841 --> 00:20:45,207 And that's why I know you would be a horrendous choice 373 00:20:45,277 --> 00:20:48,576 because I'm not looking for a great affair for my daughter. 374 00:20:48,647 --> 00:20:51,047 You know, like, gorgeous musician who's gonna break her heart. 375 00:20:51,116 --> 00:20:52,549 I'm looking for a life partner. 376 00:20:52,618 --> 00:20:53,812 That's great. Thanks. 377 00:20:53,885 --> 00:20:57,878 Yeah, no, I love being reduced to a cultural clich�. That's just terrific. 378 00:20:57,990 --> 00:21:01,221 Because only musicians break people's hearts. Wow. 379 00:21:01,827 --> 00:21:02,816 Uh... 380 00:21:04,062 --> 00:21:06,326 It's not the only place I have them. 381 00:21:09,968 --> 00:21:12,835 Well, look, you're a great guy. 382 00:21:12,904 --> 00:21:14,963 I hope you have a great life. 383 00:21:15,040 --> 00:21:17,440 But I have to do what's best for my daughter. 384 00:21:17,509 --> 00:21:18,874 Yeah, of course you do, 385 00:21:18,944 --> 00:21:21,412 but maybe you don't know what's best for your daughter. 386 00:21:21,480 --> 00:21:23,175 I beg your pardon? 387 00:21:24,750 --> 00:21:26,274 Maybe you do. 388 00:21:26,652 --> 00:21:28,210 Maybe I do. 389 00:21:28,987 --> 00:21:30,978 Nice to meet you, Daphne. 390 00:21:32,224 --> 00:21:33,851 Pleasure. Pleasure. 391 00:21:48,607 --> 00:21:49,869 Here we are. 392 00:21:50,409 --> 00:21:51,706 Almost here. 393 00:21:51,777 --> 00:21:55,178 Yeah, we've landed. We're in heaven. Oh, my God. 394 00:21:55,247 --> 00:21:58,580 Oh, my God. Look. Oh, God. Mil, look at this. 395 00:21:58,650 --> 00:22:03,314 Mom, it's polka dots. It's so Minnie Mouse. I don't even know if I like it. Do I? 396 00:22:03,388 --> 00:22:04,753 I'm hearing you hate it. 397 00:22:04,823 --> 00:22:07,257 Me, too. Oh, please, just try it on. 398 00:22:07,326 --> 00:22:08,725 Why? 399 00:22:08,794 --> 00:22:10,523 Because I said so. 400 00:22:10,595 --> 00:22:12,426 Honey, look, it might surprise you. 401 00:22:12,497 --> 00:22:15,227 Anyway, you look beautiful in dresses. In fact, you know what I think? 402 00:22:15,300 --> 00:22:17,461 I think that you should wear it to that catered affair on Sunday. 403 00:22:17,536 --> 00:22:19,902 To work? Mom, I spill things all the time. 404 00:22:19,971 --> 00:22:22,405 Oh, come on, just try it on. All right. 405 00:22:24,509 --> 00:22:26,909 Okay. That's incredible. 406 00:22:26,978 --> 00:22:28,843 It's not really me at all. 407 00:22:28,914 --> 00:22:31,075 What are you talking about? It is totally you. 408 00:22:31,149 --> 00:22:33,014 Well, it's sort of more you in a way. 409 00:22:33,085 --> 00:22:36,077 You know what it is, it's kind of Aunt Jemima meets Betty Crocker. 410 00:22:36,154 --> 00:22:38,952 You know, that's ridiculous. 411 00:22:39,558 --> 00:22:41,253 Come on, sweetie, you know what I'm going to do? 412 00:22:41,326 --> 00:22:43,453 I made up my mind. I'm going to get it for you. 413 00:22:43,528 --> 00:22:45,189 No, no, no. You're not getting me this dress. 414 00:22:45,263 --> 00:22:47,754 I don't even like it and it's absurd for work. 415 00:22:47,833 --> 00:22:48,891 No. 416 00:22:53,405 --> 00:22:54,394 Hello. 417 00:23:07,853 --> 00:23:09,184 Excuse me. 418 00:23:11,890 --> 00:23:15,087 These meatballs are my mom's recipe. 419 00:23:15,160 --> 00:23:17,856 Fantastic, I recommend everybody try some. 420 00:23:26,605 --> 00:23:28,232 I love that shade of orchid. 421 00:23:28,306 --> 00:23:29,295 Uh-huh. 422 00:23:33,345 --> 00:23:34,676 Thank you, Matisse. 423 00:23:35,947 --> 00:23:39,110 The chicken satay has got a really unique flavor. What'd you use? 424 00:23:39,184 --> 00:23:43,018 It's cumin. I'm so sorry, I can't really chat right now. 425 00:23:43,088 --> 00:23:46,751 You guys, the chocolate waterfall's not in the right spot. 426 00:23:46,825 --> 00:23:48,383 Oh, no, we can't have that. 427 00:23:48,460 --> 00:23:50,860 You know what? Let's just go ahead and just shift everything over 428 00:23:50,929 --> 00:23:52,726 so it frames the temple doors. Thank you. 429 00:23:52,798 --> 00:23:55,266 Yeah. That's the perfect spot. 430 00:23:56,535 --> 00:23:58,264 So, you like the building? 431 00:23:58,336 --> 00:24:00,065 I actually think it's a little cold. 432 00:24:02,174 --> 00:24:04,699 I'm Jason Grant. I'm the architect. 433 00:24:08,680 --> 00:24:10,910 Milly. Nice to meet you. 434 00:24:13,318 --> 00:24:14,307 435 00:24:15,320 --> 00:24:16,981 436 00:24:18,957 --> 00:24:20,982 Come on, Mom. Pick up the phone. 437 00:24:22,394 --> 00:24:23,691 438 00:24:26,331 --> 00:24:28,299 Oh, Daphne. Here we go. Hello. 439 00:24:28,366 --> 00:24:29,731 Oh, Mom, hi, it's me. 440 00:24:29,801 --> 00:24:31,496 I have to tell you the most amazing thing happened. 441 00:24:31,570 --> 00:24:33,037 This guy at work asked me out. 442 00:24:33,104 --> 00:24:34,901 He did? Yes, he's so cute. 443 00:24:34,973 --> 00:24:37,498 Mom, he's an architect. We're gonna go out Saturday night. 444 00:24:37,576 --> 00:24:39,908 Oh, you are? I'm just so excited. I'm so excited. 445 00:24:39,978 --> 00:24:44,881 Milly, well, that is really great, sweetie. That is so darn great. 446 00:24:44,950 --> 00:24:46,349 It's great, right? 447 00:24:46,418 --> 00:24:49,012 Mom, he's so cute, I can't even believe that it's happening to me. 448 00:24:49,087 --> 00:24:50,850 And he loved the polka dots. Thank you. 449 00:24:50,922 --> 00:24:52,583 Oh, yeah? Thank you Mom. Yes. 450 00:24:52,657 --> 00:24:56,184 Well, honey, it's just, I guess, dumb luck. 451 00:24:56,261 --> 00:24:57,853 You're the best. I love you. Okay. 452 00:24:57,929 --> 00:24:59,021 Bye. Bye. 453 00:24:59,264 --> 00:25:00,288 454 00:25:00,365 --> 00:25:02,060 Coop, come on! 455 00:25:02,234 --> 00:25:03,258 456 00:25:03,335 --> 00:25:04,393 Yep. 457 00:25:07,105 --> 00:25:10,802 Hello, Jason, this is Bond. 458 00:25:11,576 --> 00:25:15,171 James Bond. Call me. I'm hearing rave reviews. 459 00:25:26,825 --> 00:25:30,090 All right, I just pulled up. I'm walking in. 460 00:25:30,161 --> 00:25:32,459 It's okay. Don't worry. I'm here, I'm here. 461 00:25:33,832 --> 00:25:35,925 Sorry, sorry. 462 00:25:36,001 --> 00:25:37,764 No, no, they're not angry. 463 00:25:37,836 --> 00:25:39,667 They're not... Hold on. Sorry. 464 00:25:39,738 --> 00:25:43,037 They're just... They're probably hungry or something. 465 00:25:43,108 --> 00:25:47,807 Feed them the spring rolls from the Adams wedding 466 00:25:48,914 --> 00:25:51,974 and the sauce from the Levy wedding. 467 00:25:53,018 --> 00:25:55,680 All right, I'm walking in. Okay, bye. 468 00:26:22,213 --> 00:26:24,681 There's a lot of static out there. 469 00:26:24,749 --> 00:26:26,444 You can say that again. 470 00:26:26,518 --> 00:26:28,509 There's a lot of static out there. 471 00:26:28,587 --> 00:26:31,681 You know it's caused by a lack of humidity in the air 472 00:26:31,756 --> 00:26:34,782 that causes an imbalance of the positive and negative charges. 473 00:26:34,859 --> 00:26:39,796 You know, ice cream is known to cut the static cling in 98% of most cases. 474 00:26:39,864 --> 00:26:42,332 I love ice cream, but I'm really late to work. 475 00:26:42,400 --> 00:26:45,369 And I'm so sorry. Nice tattoo, though. 476 00:26:46,438 --> 00:26:47,871 What flavor? 477 00:26:50,342 --> 00:26:52,173 Why don't you get me your favorite? 478 00:26:52,243 --> 00:26:54,473 Why don't I get your favorite? 479 00:26:59,751 --> 00:27:00,877 Okay. 480 00:27:03,021 --> 00:27:05,421 I'll have the Fudgsicle. 481 00:27:05,490 --> 00:27:07,856 Oh, no, no. The Dreamsicle. 482 00:27:07,926 --> 00:27:09,291 Wait. Is that the tall rainbow one 483 00:27:09,361 --> 00:27:12,489 that's really embarrassing to eat, but it's really, really good? 484 00:27:12,731 --> 00:27:13,755 Okay. Never mind. 485 00:27:13,832 --> 00:27:16,596 I will have the Dreamsicly one that has the green wrapper 486 00:27:16,668 --> 00:27:18,829 with the Japanese writing on it. 487 00:27:18,903 --> 00:27:20,234 Thank you. 488 00:27:30,415 --> 00:27:32,906 I'm really beginning to feel like I'm never going to meet anyone 489 00:27:32,984 --> 00:27:35,077 and it's making me feel hopeless. 490 00:27:35,487 --> 00:27:40,356 Well, as I've said before, Stuart, Sheila was a huge loss, but that was 1993. 491 00:27:40,425 --> 00:27:42,222 Oh, it's still so fresh. 492 00:27:43,294 --> 00:27:45,125 This makes me feel like when I was in the 2nd grade, 493 00:27:45,196 --> 00:27:48,097 and I walked around with a booger in my nose all day and nobody told me. 494 00:27:48,166 --> 00:27:49,190 Why didn't they tell me? 495 00:27:49,267 --> 00:27:52,065 Well, more to the point, why didn't Sheila tell you she was unhappy? 496 00:27:52,137 --> 00:27:53,695 Oh, God, this is making me feel nauseous. 497 00:27:53,772 --> 00:27:55,296 Maybe I should change my appointment time 498 00:27:55,373 --> 00:27:56,897 from Thursdays at 3:00 to Mondays at 1:00. 499 00:27:56,975 --> 00:27:58,533 No, Stuart, we've tried that before. 500 00:27:58,610 --> 00:28:00,407 You had Fridays at 1:00 and Tuesdays at 11:00. 501 00:28:00,478 --> 00:28:02,343 It really didn't help your hypoglycemia. 502 00:28:02,414 --> 00:28:04,609 Now let's focus on where we ended last time. 503 00:28:04,683 --> 00:28:06,275 Meeting new people, 504 00:28:06,351 --> 00:28:09,218 joining an adult-education class or a book club. 505 00:28:09,287 --> 00:28:11,414 I did go to an Internet dating service. 506 00:28:11,489 --> 00:28:13,821 Good for you. That's very brave. 507 00:28:13,892 --> 00:28:15,757 It was a nightmare, Dr. Wilder-Decker. 508 00:28:15,827 --> 00:28:20,127 It made me want to kill myself, even more than the last time. 509 00:28:20,198 --> 00:28:24,294 Wow. Well, what triggered those feelings, Stuart? 510 00:28:24,402 --> 00:28:25,426 511 00:28:25,503 --> 00:28:29,769 This mother put an ad out looking for a mate for her daughter and I answered it. 512 00:28:29,841 --> 00:28:32,435 A mate for her daughter? 513 00:28:32,510 --> 00:28:34,444 Stuart, some people really shouldn't have kids. 514 00:28:34,512 --> 00:28:37,743 I guess I didn't pass the test because she made me feel about this big. 515 00:28:37,816 --> 00:28:39,283 Well, I wouldn't worry about that, Stuart. 516 00:28:39,350 --> 00:28:41,545 Imagine how screwed up any daughter of hers would be. 517 00:28:41,619 --> 00:28:44,281 And then when I pressed her as to why I couldn't meet her precious daughter, 518 00:28:44,355 --> 00:28:46,255 do you know what she said? I really hear it didn't go well. 519 00:28:46,324 --> 00:28:48,690 "Because I said so. That's why." 520 00:28:50,462 --> 00:28:53,226 Mother, how could you? When are you planning on telling her? 521 00:28:53,298 --> 00:28:54,287 Well, why does she need to know? 522 00:28:54,365 --> 00:28:56,856 I mean as long as she's happy, that's all that's important. 523 00:28:56,935 --> 00:28:59,028 And, my goodness, who knows? 524 00:28:59,170 --> 00:29:01,365 This architect could be the real magilla. 525 00:29:01,439 --> 00:29:02,633 As I've always said, 526 00:29:02,707 --> 00:29:06,336 "God couldn't be everywhere, and that is why he made mothers." 527 00:29:06,411 --> 00:29:08,777 What? That was on a Hallmark card we gave you, 528 00:29:08,847 --> 00:29:10,212 and Milly thought it was too corny. 529 00:29:10,281 --> 00:29:13,978 Don't you dare tell her, Maggie, or you and I are gonna have some serious issues. 530 00:29:14,052 --> 00:29:16,714 Well, we already have some serious issues, Mom. 531 00:29:16,788 --> 00:29:17,777 532 00:29:18,356 --> 00:29:20,290 Always so dramatic. 533 00:29:20,358 --> 00:29:23,885 Mother, this is like 6th grade drama club. Speak English. 534 00:29:29,834 --> 00:29:31,324 535 00:29:31,402 --> 00:29:33,893 Oh, God. Oh, God. Oh, God. 536 00:29:35,140 --> 00:29:36,539 Oh, hi, honey. 537 00:29:36,608 --> 00:29:37,632 Oh, Mom. 538 00:29:37,709 --> 00:29:39,904 I was just in the neighborhood and I thought I'd drop by. 539 00:29:39,978 --> 00:29:42,276 Okay, Mom. Please, you have to start calling me. 540 00:29:42,347 --> 00:29:44,281 I have a date that's on his way over right now. 541 00:29:44,349 --> 00:29:46,078 Oh, but Milly, you look so beautiful. 542 00:29:46,151 --> 00:29:47,982 Are you sure you want to wear that dress, though? 543 00:29:48,052 --> 00:29:49,349 It was such a hit the first time. I know, 544 00:29:49,420 --> 00:29:51,012 but don't you think you ought to mix it up a little bit? 545 00:29:51,089 --> 00:29:53,489 What for? Well, okay, you know, you're right. 546 00:29:53,558 --> 00:29:56,959 You're right. It looks perfect on you and everything about it. 547 00:29:57,028 --> 00:30:00,555 I'm just sort of wondering, if maybe you ought to button those buttons. 548 00:30:00,632 --> 00:30:02,827 No, no, I like it like this. 549 00:30:02,901 --> 00:30:04,869 Milly, you look like you're asking for it. 550 00:30:04,936 --> 00:30:06,369 I am asking for it. 551 00:30:06,437 --> 00:30:09,406 Okay, all right, I'll pretend I didn't hear that. 552 00:30:09,474 --> 00:30:11,408 All right, what are you going to do with your hair? 553 00:30:11,476 --> 00:30:12,807 I already did it. 554 00:30:12,877 --> 00:30:15,471 Oh, of course you did. Sure you did. 555 00:30:16,047 --> 00:30:19,073 And you're making cookies too? That's about the sweetest touch. 556 00:30:19,150 --> 00:30:22,051 No, actually, I just want the house to smell like cookies when he gets over here. 557 00:30:22,120 --> 00:30:24,918 Mom, it's 6:49, look. And he's supposed to be here at 7:00. 558 00:30:24,989 --> 00:30:27,150 You have to go, please, please, please. Okay. I can take a hint. 559 00:30:27,225 --> 00:30:28,749 It's not a hint. Mom, go. All right. 560 00:30:28,827 --> 00:30:30,089 Oh, he's here. He's here. 561 00:30:30,161 --> 00:30:31,150 Okay, you gotta go. All right. 562 00:30:31,229 --> 00:30:32,321 You gotta go please, Mom, Mom. All right. 563 00:30:32,397 --> 00:30:34,194 But wait, sweetie. Just have a good time. Okay. 564 00:30:34,265 --> 00:30:36,733 Feel free to be yourself, but remember... I love you, but you gotta go. 565 00:30:36,801 --> 00:30:40,396 ...don't be too, you know, forthcoming with all your failed relationships. 566 00:30:40,471 --> 00:30:41,563 Okay, I got it. 567 00:30:41,639 --> 00:30:43,231 And sweetie, sweetie. I love you. 568 00:30:43,308 --> 00:30:46,334 Keep that mystery alive. I love you. I love you for some reason. 569 00:30:46,411 --> 00:30:47,503 Okay. 570 00:30:47,579 --> 00:30:48,807 571 00:30:49,214 --> 00:30:52,206 I'm going to pull my hair out. What? What, what? 572 00:30:52,283 --> 00:30:54,251 I know, I know. Just one more little thing. 573 00:30:54,319 --> 00:30:57,652 I don't know, Mom, I gotta go. He's here. I want you to wear this. 574 00:30:57,722 --> 00:31:00,054 Oh, my God. Grandma's diamond? Yeah. 575 00:31:00,658 --> 00:31:02,023 Put it on me, put it on me. 576 00:31:02,093 --> 00:31:03,458 I want to wear it tonight. All right. 577 00:31:03,528 --> 00:31:05,291 Okay. I know. I know, he's coming. 578 00:31:05,363 --> 00:31:07,331 Don't worry. Here we go. Okay. 579 00:31:08,233 --> 00:31:12,169 Mom, you never let any of us wear this. It's so special. 580 00:31:12,503 --> 00:31:14,232 So special. Thank you. 581 00:31:15,773 --> 00:31:16,933 What? 582 00:31:17,008 --> 00:31:18,407 583 00:31:18,476 --> 00:31:22,412 May it bring you luck with the architect. Your sisters and I will expect a full report. 584 00:31:22,480 --> 00:31:23,469 Okay? Okay. 585 00:31:23,548 --> 00:31:25,812 I'll give it to you tomorrow night after I go out with him. 586 00:31:25,884 --> 00:31:27,078 Tomorrow night? Yeah, yeah. 587 00:31:27,151 --> 00:31:29,312 I'm going out with another great guy tonight. 588 00:31:29,387 --> 00:31:31,947 He's taking me to Luna Station to hear some music. 589 00:31:32,023 --> 00:31:33,650 You are? Can you believe that, Mom? 590 00:31:33,725 --> 00:31:35,454 It's like I gave up, I stopped trying 591 00:31:35,526 --> 00:31:37,687 and the universe brought me two amazing guys. 592 00:31:37,762 --> 00:31:39,525 Great, right? Wow. Whoa, that's so great. 593 00:31:39,597 --> 00:31:41,064 It's one of those amazing things, huh? 594 00:31:41,132 --> 00:31:44,101 All right, sweetie. Well now, bye. Bye-bye. 595 00:31:51,376 --> 00:31:52,604 Go, go. 596 00:31:53,211 --> 00:31:55,042 Go, Mother, go. 597 00:31:57,715 --> 00:31:59,273 Hi. 598 00:31:59,684 --> 00:32:01,709 It was either this or roses. 599 00:32:03,054 --> 00:32:04,385 Thank you. 600 00:32:05,890 --> 00:32:07,084 Come on in. Cookies? 601 00:32:07,158 --> 00:32:08,147 Yeah. 602 00:32:08,226 --> 00:32:09,386 Nice. 603 00:32:11,296 --> 00:32:15,198 Really seem to have such a different approach and attitude towards life 604 00:32:15,266 --> 00:32:18,929 that people don't really get here as much, I think. 605 00:32:22,073 --> 00:32:24,473 Okay, don't worry. We're gonna get a quick look at who he is 606 00:32:24,542 --> 00:32:25,531 and then we're gonna go home 607 00:32:25,610 --> 00:32:28,545 and finish watching Gary Cooper in Love in the Afternoon. 608 00:32:30,882 --> 00:32:32,349 609 00:32:35,920 --> 00:32:39,014 Come on, man. Okay. Yes. Yeah. 610 00:32:40,925 --> 00:32:44,417 Okay. Go, go, baby. Okay, okay. 611 00:32:49,367 --> 00:32:50,629 Come on. 612 00:32:52,270 --> 00:32:53,999 613 00:32:54,973 --> 00:32:57,999 Coop, Coop, everything's okay, sweetie. Where the heck am I? 614 00:32:58,076 --> 00:32:59,634 God. Okay. Oh, jeez. 615 00:32:59,711 --> 00:33:02,179 Okay. Let me just... Okay, I'll turn this. Okay. 616 00:33:02,246 --> 00:33:04,305 Welcome, what is your destination? 617 00:33:04,382 --> 00:33:06,282 Luna Station. 618 00:33:06,351 --> 00:33:07,909 Your address is... Is, okay, what? 619 00:33:07,986 --> 00:33:12,047 ... 1242 Amherst Boulevard. 12... 620 00:33:12,123 --> 00:33:13,556 So where is Amherst? 621 00:33:13,624 --> 00:33:17,287 Continue north 2.4 miles and then east. 622 00:33:17,362 --> 00:33:19,057 Well, where is north? The left? 623 00:33:19,130 --> 00:33:20,529 Continue north 2.4 miles then east. 624 00:33:20,598 --> 00:33:22,156 Give me a left. Give me a right. Left. Right. 625 00:33:22,233 --> 00:33:23,632 Something like... 626 00:33:23,701 --> 00:33:25,066 Please. For God's sake. 627 00:33:25,136 --> 00:33:26,467 You know what you are? Continue north 2.4 miles... 628 00:33:26,537 --> 00:33:27,629 I'll tell you what you are. ... and then east. 629 00:33:27,705 --> 00:33:29,070 You are redundant. 630 00:33:29,140 --> 00:33:32,473 Continue north 2.4 miles and then east. And it's a horrible quality. 631 00:33:32,543 --> 00:33:34,477 You awful machine. Continue, continue... 632 00:33:34,545 --> 00:33:38,140 And that's for you. I'm sorry, command too loud. 633 00:33:46,124 --> 00:33:47,591 634 00:33:51,162 --> 00:33:52,424 635 00:33:58,436 --> 00:33:59,733 Are you guys ready to rock? 636 00:34:00,671 --> 00:34:02,639 Yeah. All right. 637 00:34:02,707 --> 00:34:05,073 Let's play something for Milly over there. 638 00:34:05,143 --> 00:34:06,974 A little blues in E, okay? 639 00:34:07,045 --> 00:34:09,377 One, two, three, four. 640 00:34:11,382 --> 00:34:13,441 Now we're coming up on the A. 641 00:34:17,388 --> 00:34:19,879 Molly, that sounds terrific. 642 00:34:22,393 --> 00:34:23,724 I feel really bad. 643 00:34:23,795 --> 00:34:27,458 No, no, I would have done the same thing if one of my staff had called in sick. 644 00:34:27,532 --> 00:34:28,931 It's only gonna be 20 more minutes. 645 00:34:29,000 --> 00:34:30,865 It's just that they memorized an E progression 646 00:34:30,935 --> 00:34:32,903 and that is a major feat for them. 647 00:34:32,970 --> 00:34:33,959 Okay. 648 00:34:34,038 --> 00:34:35,471 Yeah, I'll be right back. 649 00:34:35,540 --> 00:34:37,007 Go, Nicky. 650 00:34:37,341 --> 00:34:38,467 Yeah. 651 00:34:39,877 --> 00:34:41,970 A little bit harder over there. 652 00:34:42,046 --> 00:34:44,640 Strum a little bit closer, up here. 653 00:35:05,036 --> 00:35:06,663 That sounds really nice. 654 00:35:06,737 --> 00:35:09,001 Really? Well, thank you, teacher. 655 00:35:09,974 --> 00:35:13,569 Actually, I love to sing. My whole family loves to sing. 656 00:35:14,712 --> 00:35:16,907 And when I was younger, I always wanted to take piano lessons, 657 00:35:16,981 --> 00:35:19,415 but my mom was struggling so much supporting us all 658 00:35:19,484 --> 00:35:22,715 that I just felt way too guilty to ask. 659 00:35:24,088 --> 00:35:25,214 Here. 660 00:35:25,990 --> 00:35:27,082 What? 661 00:35:28,559 --> 00:35:29,719 What? 662 00:35:30,228 --> 00:35:33,288 Play what you were playing before. It sounded really good. 663 00:35:33,364 --> 00:35:34,888 Really? Yeah. 664 00:35:36,000 --> 00:35:37,831 I'm no good, but okay. 665 00:35:38,736 --> 00:35:39,964 Try it. 666 00:35:44,509 --> 00:35:45,737 Like that? Yeah. 667 00:35:45,810 --> 00:35:46,799 All righty. 668 00:35:48,446 --> 00:35:50,107 I'll take it up here. Okay. 669 00:35:50,181 --> 00:35:51,910 We'll meet in the middle. 670 00:35:52,283 --> 00:35:54,080 It's down there. Sorry. 671 00:35:54,152 --> 00:35:56,416 How about I come close to you? 672 00:35:57,522 --> 00:35:59,012 I don't mind. 673 00:36:00,224 --> 00:36:01,555 All right. 674 00:36:04,061 --> 00:36:05,323 675 00:36:05,396 --> 00:36:07,557 Why are there a lot of ducks in Venice? 676 00:36:07,632 --> 00:36:10,362 Ten ducks are swimming down the canal 677 00:36:10,434 --> 00:36:13,870 and one says, "This place is quacked." 678 00:36:14,272 --> 00:36:15,830 679 00:36:16,440 --> 00:36:17,464 That's terrible. 680 00:36:17,542 --> 00:36:18,941 No, that's really cute, actually. 681 00:36:19,010 --> 00:36:20,602 It's very cute. 682 00:36:20,678 --> 00:36:23,010 This is me. Come on in. 683 00:36:26,517 --> 00:36:31,113 I love this. It's so cozy. Thanks. 684 00:36:31,989 --> 00:36:33,547 So comfy. Yeah. 685 00:36:33,624 --> 00:36:35,751 Three, two, one, blast off. 686 00:36:35,826 --> 00:36:37,657 I'm in orbit. I'm in orbit. 687 00:36:37,728 --> 00:36:41,425 Okay, Lionel, let's... All right. Okay, come back here. 688 00:36:41,499 --> 00:36:44,059 Let's start winding down for bed, all right? 689 00:36:44,235 --> 00:36:46,465 Who are you? What planet do you hail from? 690 00:36:46,537 --> 00:36:50,735 This is Milly from planet Milly. This is Lionel from planet Johnny. 691 00:36:50,808 --> 00:36:53,106 Hi, Lionel, it's very nice to meet you. 692 00:36:53,177 --> 00:36:54,804 You have a 'gina. 693 00:36:56,814 --> 00:36:58,338 I have a what? 694 00:36:58,416 --> 00:37:00,179 I have a penis. You have a 'gina. 695 00:37:00,251 --> 00:37:02,776 Okay, buddy, give me a break here, okay? 696 00:37:02,853 --> 00:37:04,320 Can I see it? Hey. 697 00:37:04,388 --> 00:37:05,480 698 00:37:05,556 --> 00:37:08,024 Lionel. Lionel. 699 00:37:09,193 --> 00:37:10,319 Lionel. - Dad? 700 00:37:11,429 --> 00:37:12,418 Hi. 701 00:37:12,530 --> 00:37:14,088 This is Milly. 702 00:37:16,033 --> 00:37:17,933 Joe Dresden. Nice to meet you. 703 00:37:18,002 --> 00:37:19,367 Nice to meet you. 704 00:37:19,437 --> 00:37:21,962 Sorry. It's moon dust. 705 00:37:23,908 --> 00:37:25,136 It's okay. 706 00:37:25,209 --> 00:37:27,700 Well, excuse me. It's usually just us guys. 707 00:37:27,778 --> 00:37:32,477 Johnny hasn't brought home a gal in, God, I don't know how long. 708 00:37:32,550 --> 00:37:34,882 Great, I'm getting it from both sides. 709 00:37:35,886 --> 00:37:37,046 Sorry. 710 00:37:38,623 --> 00:37:40,614 Come on, buddy, let's you and me go in the other room. 711 00:37:40,691 --> 00:37:43,592 These guys are boring. Nope, nope, nope. 712 00:37:43,661 --> 00:37:46,425 What'd you have for lunch today? 713 00:37:46,497 --> 00:37:48,124 Baloney sandwich. 714 00:37:48,199 --> 00:37:50,394 I'm not the baloney. Yes, you are. 715 00:37:59,277 --> 00:38:01,609 I think we got him. There we go. We got him. 716 00:38:02,913 --> 00:38:04,540 We'll see you. 717 00:38:04,949 --> 00:38:06,211 Night. 718 00:38:14,725 --> 00:38:16,659 Oh, my God. 719 00:38:18,029 --> 00:38:21,123 Mr. Grant. This way. Hey, man, how you doing? 720 00:38:21,632 --> 00:38:23,361 This is so amazing. Yeah. 721 00:38:23,434 --> 00:38:25,459 It's really unbelievable. Yeah? 722 00:38:26,971 --> 00:38:29,963 This is so great. It's beautiful. 723 00:38:31,375 --> 00:38:32,842 It's great. 724 00:38:32,910 --> 00:38:34,172 I love this angle on the city. 725 00:38:34,245 --> 00:38:37,476 I never knew this existed. Gosh. 726 00:38:39,483 --> 00:38:41,747 So what's good here? 727 00:38:41,819 --> 00:38:45,016 Well, I hope you don't mind, but knowing your love of food, 728 00:38:45,089 --> 00:38:47,353 I didn't want you to miss these. 729 00:38:47,425 --> 00:38:48,414 Oh. 730 00:38:48,759 --> 00:38:52,058 No, no, no, that's great 731 00:38:52,663 --> 00:38:54,597 'cause I make decisions all day long. 732 00:38:54,665 --> 00:38:57,793 You know, the Gillespies' daughter is allergic to chocolate, 733 00:38:57,868 --> 00:38:59,893 but she wants a brown cake, and... 734 00:38:59,970 --> 00:39:02,996 My lease is up on my car, do I get a hybrid? 'Cause I really believe in them 735 00:39:03,074 --> 00:39:06,305 but I don't know if it's time to switch insurance, it's... 736 00:39:07,411 --> 00:39:11,438 What I mean is, it's very nice to not have to think for a change. 737 00:39:13,284 --> 00:39:14,273 738 00:39:19,090 --> 00:39:20,250 739 00:39:20,324 --> 00:39:23,816 Well, last time I was in Italy, I was in Siena, and they make this wine there, 740 00:39:23,894 --> 00:39:25,725 and this is the only place in the city that serves it. 741 00:39:25,796 --> 00:39:29,288 You've been to Siena, right? Oh, well, of course, I haven't. No. 742 00:39:29,367 --> 00:39:31,096 Are you kidding? 743 00:39:31,168 --> 00:39:34,137 Wouldn't it be fun to drink our way through Tuscany? 744 00:39:34,205 --> 00:39:36,571 lt'd be amazing. 745 00:39:37,208 --> 00:39:39,836 God, this calamari is so... 746 00:39:40,411 --> 00:39:44,438 Is that City Hall? God, I love old buildings. You know, the attention to... 747 00:39:44,515 --> 00:39:47,006 Not that I don't love modern architecture 'cause I totally do. 748 00:39:47,084 --> 00:39:48,881 It's so bold, but you know what I mean. 749 00:39:48,953 --> 00:39:51,387 Who wants to live in all that concrete? 750 00:39:52,022 --> 00:39:56,459 And yet, you know, the Zen of clean minds, that kind of Asian simplicity, 751 00:39:56,527 --> 00:39:59,690 living without all the clutter, is great. 752 00:40:03,434 --> 00:40:07,734 This view is amazing. My mom would love this view. 753 00:40:07,805 --> 00:40:09,102 Oh, yeah? 754 00:40:09,907 --> 00:40:11,807 Does she have good taste? 755 00:40:13,077 --> 00:40:14,476 lmpeccable. 756 00:40:17,114 --> 00:40:19,412 Now I know that this is the part of the evening 757 00:40:19,483 --> 00:40:23,214 where I'm supposed to sit way over here in this chair. 758 00:40:23,287 --> 00:40:26,552 But can I jump five spaces and pass "Go"? 759 00:40:27,324 --> 00:40:29,622 Well, "can" implies "are you capable." 760 00:40:29,693 --> 00:40:32,253 "May" asks the question. 761 00:40:32,329 --> 00:40:33,819 Milly, may I? 762 00:40:34,665 --> 00:40:36,394 Yes, you may. 763 00:40:36,467 --> 00:40:38,401 Milly, may I kiss you? 764 00:40:49,780 --> 00:40:55,377 765 00:40:55,453 --> 00:40:57,182 I'm sorry. Could you hold that thought for a second? 766 00:40:57,254 --> 00:40:58,778 I have to, like... 767 00:41:03,027 --> 00:41:04,016 What? 768 00:41:04,462 --> 00:41:08,694 Well, I just got that new conference call feature, so we thought we'd try it out. 769 00:41:08,933 --> 00:41:10,798 New? Hey, Milly. 770 00:41:10,868 --> 00:41:12,733 Hi, how's it going? Yes. He's a great kisser. 771 00:41:12,803 --> 00:41:16,068 Wonderful. Isn't that great, girls? - Yeah. 772 00:41:16,140 --> 00:41:17,801 That's so much better than... Remember that Ted guy? 773 00:41:17,875 --> 00:41:19,103 He seemed to have a lot of potential, 774 00:41:19,176 --> 00:41:20,700 then he ended up having, like, lizard tongue. 775 00:41:20,778 --> 00:41:21,767 Oh, yeah. 776 00:41:21,846 --> 00:41:23,939 And as I remember, an over-intake of Mentos 777 00:41:24,014 --> 00:41:26,107 which didn't cover the buffalo wing breath. 778 00:41:26,183 --> 00:41:27,673 That's disgusting, Mae. 779 00:41:27,751 --> 00:41:29,810 Though, as I recall, those kisses bombed upstairs, 780 00:41:29,887 --> 00:41:31,411 but had a certain finesse downstairs. 781 00:41:31,489 --> 00:41:34,458 I remember that. Yes, downstairs and... 782 00:41:34,525 --> 00:41:36,015 I don't want to hear it. 783 00:41:36,093 --> 00:41:38,618 Guys, all right, I gotta go kiss. I gotta go kiss. 784 00:41:38,696 --> 00:41:39,822 Okay, I gotta go too. No. 785 00:41:39,897 --> 00:41:41,194 Me three. Bye. 786 00:42:09,827 --> 00:42:11,124 Yeah. - Yeah. 787 00:42:11,195 --> 00:42:12,184 788 00:42:12,796 --> 00:42:14,127 Feels good. Yeah. 790 00:42:16,967 --> 00:42:17,956 Hello? 791 00:42:18,335 --> 00:42:19,324 Hello? 792 00:42:19,737 --> 00:42:20,726 Mom? 793 00:42:20,871 --> 00:42:22,338 No. Are you there? 794 00:42:22,740 --> 00:42:24,105 Okay. Mom? 795 00:42:24,174 --> 00:42:25,835 What, honey? Mom? 796 00:42:26,210 --> 00:42:27,438 Are you okay? 797 00:42:27,511 --> 00:42:31,174 What, honey? No, yeah. I'm fine. 798 00:42:31,248 --> 00:42:33,182 No, wait. Mom, what's that sound? 799 00:42:33,250 --> 00:42:35,411 Well, Cooper's in heat. Good night. 800 00:42:35,486 --> 00:42:37,317 Cooper's a boy. Mom? 801 00:42:40,691 --> 00:42:44,092 He wants potato pancakes in the shape of footballs 802 00:42:44,161 --> 00:42:47,392 with Gandalf's face on them in sour cream. 803 00:42:47,464 --> 00:42:49,932 We can do that. You start, though. 804 00:42:50,034 --> 00:42:51,023 Hello. 805 00:42:52,403 --> 00:42:54,837 Hi. Wow. 806 00:42:54,905 --> 00:42:57,635 Lionel helped picked these. He wanted you to know. 807 00:42:57,708 --> 00:43:02,475 Oh, my gosh. Thank you so much. Lionel, they're beautiful. 808 00:43:03,347 --> 00:43:06,578 And you know what? You can actually eat these flowers. 809 00:43:06,650 --> 00:43:08,117 They're really good in salads. 810 00:43:08,185 --> 00:43:10,346 Although, when I was your age, I didn't like anything green. 811 00:43:10,421 --> 00:43:11,479 And now I've learned to love 812 00:43:11,555 --> 00:43:12,783 spinach... Now if she could just stop talking 813 00:43:12,856 --> 00:43:13,982 for five seconds. ...Brussels sprouts, broccoli. 815 00:43:15,159 --> 00:43:16,717 Oh, I got it, I got it, I got it. 816 00:43:16,794 --> 00:43:18,421 No, we'll get it. I got it. 817 00:43:19,363 --> 00:43:21,888 Hey, Lionel, come on, you wanna help us eat the centerpiece? 818 00:43:21,966 --> 00:43:23,263 Can I, Dad? 819 00:43:23,334 --> 00:43:25,393 Yeah, yeah. Go ahead. Go crazy. 820 00:43:25,469 --> 00:43:26,493 Bye. 821 00:43:27,304 --> 00:43:29,135 If you don't, I will. 822 00:43:34,144 --> 00:43:35,736 There was a lot going on the other night. 823 00:43:35,813 --> 00:43:40,216 And I didn't get to tell you about Lionel's unique rhythm and I'm sorry... 824 00:43:40,284 --> 00:43:43,720 Oh, gosh, no, it's fine. I actually feel a kinship with him. 825 00:43:43,787 --> 00:43:47,746 You know he can't stop running around and I can't stop talking. 826 00:43:48,058 --> 00:43:50,891 I kind of think you're gonna have your hands full. 828 00:43:52,162 --> 00:43:53,789 They said it couldn't be done, but I did it. 829 00:43:53,864 --> 00:43:55,126 How was your date with the... 830 00:43:55,199 --> 00:43:56,928 Oh, my gosh, Mom... 831 00:43:57,334 --> 00:44:02,328 Mom, this is Johnny. Johnny, this is my mom, Daphne. 832 00:44:04,208 --> 00:44:06,733 Hi. Oh. 834 00:44:09,546 --> 00:44:10,570 Oh! 835 00:44:10,648 --> 00:44:12,912 Lionel. Johnny's son. 836 00:44:13,317 --> 00:44:14,716 John, is it? 837 00:44:15,986 --> 00:44:17,647 Lionel. Come on, buddy. 838 00:44:17,721 --> 00:44:18,710 Uh-huh. 839 00:44:21,225 --> 00:44:22,749 Lionel, come on here now. 840 00:44:22,826 --> 00:44:24,817 Pardon me. - Johnny. That's Johnny. 841 00:44:24,895 --> 00:44:26,829 Lionel, that's so cute. 842 00:44:27,998 --> 00:44:30,296 Oh, my gosh. Oh, Mom. 844 00:44:34,805 --> 00:44:37,296 The delivery man's here. Is this menorah-esque? 845 00:44:37,374 --> 00:44:38,534 Mom, I don't even know if this is good. 846 00:44:38,609 --> 00:44:40,668 Find something Hobbit-like. I don't have anything Hobbit-like. 847 00:44:40,744 --> 00:44:41,972 We should try and make this work, though. 848 00:44:42,046 --> 00:44:43,445 They're never gonna never know it's from Gelson's. 849 00:44:43,514 --> 00:44:46,347 Oh, wait, wait. I used this for Jason's party. 850 00:44:46,417 --> 00:44:48,476 Jason has such nice eyes. Okay. 851 00:44:48,819 --> 00:44:49,877 Thank you. 852 00:44:50,654 --> 00:44:52,383 Happy Bar Mitzvah, Josh Greenberg. 853 00:44:52,456 --> 00:44:54,048 How do you know Jason has such nice eyes? 854 00:44:54,124 --> 00:44:57,890 Does he? Oh, that's so sweet. He seems like a very special person. 855 00:44:57,961 --> 00:45:01,192 What if we try that new vase on the coffee table? 856 00:45:01,865 --> 00:45:05,596 He is nice. But actually, they both are. Oh, I'm sure they both are. 857 00:45:05,669 --> 00:45:07,569 But in terms of who you wanna get serious with, 858 00:45:07,638 --> 00:45:10,471 that Johnny, at least from what I can see, can't even get his life together. 859 00:45:10,541 --> 00:45:14,375 But I'm gonna stop, all right? You know what's wrong? 860 00:45:14,445 --> 00:45:16,413 The couch is in the wrong place. Look. 861 00:45:16,480 --> 00:45:18,243 I got an idea. Okay. 862 00:45:18,315 --> 00:45:20,647 So we'll move the couch. Which way? Let's move it this way. 863 00:45:20,718 --> 00:45:21,810 Here we go. 864 00:45:39,670 --> 00:45:42,639 That's so good. Okay, there we go. I think it's good. 865 00:45:42,706 --> 00:45:45,231 Oh, yeah. Oh, my God, look at that. 866 00:45:45,309 --> 00:45:48,278 It's so great. It, like, completely opens the room up. 867 00:45:48,345 --> 00:45:49,573 So very, very, very good. I love it. 868 00:45:49,646 --> 00:45:51,876 The only thing is... Can I just say this? What? 869 00:45:51,949 --> 00:45:54,509 We haven't tried the couch by the window. I think we should. 871 00:45:56,186 --> 00:45:58,882 All right. I don't even know if I see it here. Okay. Oh, gosh. 872 00:45:59,123 --> 00:46:00,647 Just a second. Hello? 873 00:46:01,925 --> 00:46:05,326 You have the wrong number. Yeah. There is no J. Bond here. 874 00:46:05,796 --> 00:46:09,732 FYI, the Eagle has landed. 875 00:46:09,800 --> 00:46:14,203 Yeah, the hen is in the house. Repeat, the hen is in the house. Right now. 876 00:46:15,439 --> 00:46:17,236 All right, honey? 877 00:46:17,307 --> 00:46:19,332 Mil, if we push this five inches to the left, 878 00:46:19,409 --> 00:46:21,434 I swear it's gonna transform your life. 879 00:46:21,512 --> 00:46:23,980 You really think so? I wouldn't lie to you. 880 00:46:24,047 --> 00:46:25,514 All right. Come on, let's go. 881 00:46:25,582 --> 00:46:26,640 Okay, on three. Yeah. 883 00:46:27,818 --> 00:46:29,581 One, two, three. 884 00:46:30,120 --> 00:46:32,953 Hey, it's Milly, leave me a message. This way. Mom? 885 00:46:33,090 --> 00:46:35,524 Hey, Milly. It's Jason. I was thinking about you 886 00:46:35,592 --> 00:46:37,287 and I wanted to say what... Pick it up. Answer it. 887 00:46:37,361 --> 00:46:39,727 Does he sound wonderful or what? Why don't you wanna talk to him? 888 00:46:39,797 --> 00:46:43,096 I do wanna talk to him. I just don't wanna do it in front of you, all right? 889 00:46:43,167 --> 00:46:44,191 Come on, Milly, I mean I don't... 890 00:46:44,268 --> 00:46:46,634 I got us tickets to the Music Center Friday night for La Boh�me. 891 00:46:46,703 --> 00:46:50,366 La Boh�me. Oh, come on, sweetie, I love La Boh�me. 892 00:46:50,440 --> 00:46:52,670 Just pick up the phone. Mom, I don't want to talk to him. 893 00:46:52,743 --> 00:46:55,803 It's a really interesting production... Mil, Mil, pick up the phone. 894 00:46:55,879 --> 00:46:58,245 Mom, stop. No, no, no, don't pick up the phone. 895 00:46:58,315 --> 00:47:00,977 Here, take it. Say yes. Stop, stop. 896 00:47:02,953 --> 00:47:04,147 Hi. 897 00:47:05,222 --> 00:47:06,849 Yeah, I'm great. 898 00:47:08,091 --> 00:47:10,082 Oh, great. Yeah, okay. 899 00:47:10,260 --> 00:47:11,249 Mmm-hmm. 900 00:47:11,495 --> 00:47:13,986 That sounds really great. Great. 901 00:47:14,064 --> 00:47:15,725 Yeah, great. Okay. 902 00:47:15,799 --> 00:47:18,632 All right. Okay, I'll talk to you soon. 903 00:47:18,702 --> 00:47:20,966 Okay, great. Bye. 904 00:47:23,674 --> 00:47:25,437 He obviously adores you. 905 00:47:25,943 --> 00:47:28,810 You think so? Oh, God, and who wouldn't? 906 00:47:28,879 --> 00:47:33,043 But, hon, are you aware of how many times you used the word "great"? 907 00:47:34,051 --> 00:47:35,575 These candlesticks gotta go. 908 00:47:35,652 --> 00:47:38,883 No, no, no. I like them. They're staying. They're great. 909 00:47:39,189 --> 00:47:42,283 Milly, you know how much I hate to meddle, but I once had the choice 910 00:47:42,359 --> 00:47:45,954 between a mature, responsible young man like Jason, 911 00:47:46,029 --> 00:47:49,055 and your father, who, of course, I was infatuated with. 912 00:47:49,132 --> 00:47:51,066 And to this day... Okay, okay. 913 00:47:51,134 --> 00:47:52,226 You know what? 914 00:47:52,302 --> 00:47:55,135 To be fair, you're reading a lot into a guy that you've met for ten minutes. 915 00:47:55,205 --> 00:47:59,437 Truth be told, that Johnny has heartbreak written all over his face. 916 00:47:59,509 --> 00:48:02,967 No, no, no. Truth be told, you know absolutely nothing about him. 917 00:48:03,046 --> 00:48:05,207 And know what, Mom? I gotta go 'cause I'm getting my bangs cut. 918 00:48:05,282 --> 00:48:06,909 What? No, no, you go ahead. 919 00:48:06,984 --> 00:48:08,110 No, that's okay, you go ahead. 920 00:48:08,185 --> 00:48:09,174 Yes. Fine. 921 00:48:09,253 --> 00:48:11,118 Cut your bangs and quit hiding your incredible eyes. 922 00:48:11,188 --> 00:48:13,986 To be truthful, you know nothing about him. He's actually a good parent. 923 00:48:14,057 --> 00:48:16,082 Hiding your incredible eyes. I can't do this. 924 00:48:16,159 --> 00:48:20,027 Milly, I love you and you may be brilliant, but you're not smart. 925 00:48:20,097 --> 00:48:22,395 I just want you to have a full, beautiful life. 926 00:48:22,466 --> 00:48:25,094 Do I not have a life, Mom? Because I thought I had a life. 927 00:48:25,168 --> 00:48:27,261 No. No, you have a career, you have a car 928 00:48:27,337 --> 00:48:29,669 and you have a loft you pay way too much rent for. 929 00:48:29,740 --> 00:48:30,764 That's not a life. 930 00:48:30,841 --> 00:48:35,039 Milly, I'm your mother. I love you enough to tell you the truth. 931 00:48:35,112 --> 00:48:37,910 Your version of the truth, Mom. No. No. 932 00:48:37,981 --> 00:48:41,508 The truth is, happiness is a series of choices. 933 00:48:41,585 --> 00:48:43,348 It's not something that just sort of happens. 934 00:48:43,420 --> 00:48:46,514 One wrong decision can change your whole life. 935 00:48:48,659 --> 00:48:50,490 There's still time, Mom. 936 00:48:50,560 --> 00:48:52,585 Not if you waste another minute of it. 937 00:48:52,663 --> 00:48:54,961 I mean for you. 938 00:48:59,002 --> 00:49:01,994 And I don't say "great" too much. 939 00:49:05,609 --> 00:49:07,770 This is great. This is great. 940 00:49:08,178 --> 00:49:11,341 The view is great. The night is just so great. 941 00:49:11,415 --> 00:49:13,110 You warm enough? You wanna go inside? 942 00:49:13,183 --> 00:49:15,515 No, no, no, I'm fine. I'm nice and toasty. 943 00:49:15,585 --> 00:49:16,609 Okay, all right. 944 00:49:16,687 --> 00:49:21,624 And don't you just love my mom's orange blossom cheesecake? So good. 945 00:49:21,692 --> 00:49:23,557 Get a big bite. Wow. 946 00:49:25,095 --> 00:49:27,086 It's great, right? 947 00:49:27,597 --> 00:49:32,193 It's superb, which is a synonym for great, if you're ever looking for one. 948 00:49:34,104 --> 00:49:37,505 You know, you're cold. Let's go inside. 949 00:49:37,574 --> 00:49:38,939 You get the candle, I'll get the rest. 950 00:49:39,009 --> 00:49:40,374 Let me grab that. 951 00:49:40,844 --> 00:49:42,937 Be careful with that. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. 952 00:49:43,013 --> 00:49:44,071 I'm so sorry. 953 00:49:44,147 --> 00:49:46,411 Oh, my gosh, please tell me where I can get you another one... 954 00:49:46,483 --> 00:49:49,247 You can't. It's my great-grandmother's. 955 00:49:49,519 --> 00:49:51,544 Oh, my God. Jason. 956 00:49:52,189 --> 00:49:54,555 I don't know what to say. I'm sorry. 957 00:49:54,624 --> 00:49:56,216 Please, I'm just, I've been so out of it lately. 958 00:49:56,293 --> 00:49:59,262 My alarm clock didn't go off today and that's why I was late 959 00:49:59,329 --> 00:50:01,593 and I've just been so stressed with the Greenberg Bar Mitzvah, 960 00:50:01,665 --> 00:50:03,189 but that's a whole... 961 00:50:04,568 --> 00:50:07,765 You just seem really angry. 962 00:50:08,839 --> 00:50:10,101 Nope. 963 00:50:11,008 --> 00:50:12,339 I'm great. 964 00:50:18,682 --> 00:50:19,808 Okay. 965 00:50:22,886 --> 00:50:25,446 I promise you they're the best chocolate souffl�s ever. 966 00:50:25,522 --> 00:50:27,149 Well, they better be. They're worth it. 967 00:50:27,224 --> 00:50:28,657 Touchdown. 968 00:50:29,626 --> 00:50:31,958 Oh, my gosh, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. 969 00:50:32,029 --> 00:50:34,327 Hey, it's all right. That's all right. 970 00:50:35,132 --> 00:50:37,692 I'm sorry. I bumped into, like, a parking meter yesterday 971 00:50:37,768 --> 00:50:39,463 and I'm always breaking stuff. 972 00:50:39,536 --> 00:50:42,403 Why are you apologizing? It isn't even your fault. 973 00:50:42,472 --> 00:50:46,169 Lionel, put some shoes on before you come back in here, all right? 974 00:50:46,610 --> 00:50:50,637 Look, I know he can be a lot and it gets a little crazy around here sometimes. 975 00:50:50,714 --> 00:50:54,047 But here you are making us chocolate souffl�s and you're apologizing. 976 00:50:54,117 --> 00:50:57,746 Sometimes, I think you let people make you feel bad about yourself. 977 00:50:57,821 --> 00:51:00,153 Yeah, like you are right now? 979 00:51:03,026 --> 00:51:05,187 What is going on with us today? 980 00:51:05,262 --> 00:51:07,287 We're having an off day, that's all. 981 00:51:11,435 --> 00:51:13,027 What are you doing? I'm leaving. 982 00:51:13,103 --> 00:51:14,798 I'm leaving because you're miserable 983 00:51:14,871 --> 00:51:16,862 and we're having a bad day. You just admitted it. 984 00:51:16,940 --> 00:51:18,305 No, I said "off day." 985 00:51:18,375 --> 00:51:19,967 And, yes, we've had better days, 986 00:51:20,043 --> 00:51:22,068 and I'm sure we'll have a few hundred more weird ones 987 00:51:22,145 --> 00:51:24,045 if we stay together. So what? 988 00:51:26,550 --> 00:51:27,710 Johnny. Give me your hand. 989 00:51:27,784 --> 00:51:30,150 What? I'm going to try something here. 990 00:51:30,854 --> 00:51:33,948 What are you doing? Just a little something. 991 00:51:41,631 --> 00:51:42,655 Oh. 992 00:51:42,732 --> 00:51:44,859 The souffl�s are done. No, the timer didn't go off. 993 00:51:44,935 --> 00:51:48,098 No, no. I feel it. I feel it. Watch. 994 00:51:57,981 --> 00:52:00,108 Those look beautiful. Thank you. 995 00:52:00,183 --> 00:52:02,913 The one thing I can actually do right. 996 00:52:04,855 --> 00:52:07,688 You have perfect timing. Thank you. 997 00:52:08,525 --> 00:52:09,856 Come here. 998 00:52:13,463 --> 00:52:15,124 Don't apologize. 999 00:52:17,701 --> 00:52:19,999 He has this way of calming me down. 1000 00:52:20,070 --> 00:52:22,436 A huge plus. Yeah. 1001 00:52:23,573 --> 00:52:24,767 But then the whole Lionel thing. 1002 00:52:24,841 --> 00:52:29,039 I just worry and wonder, would I be a good mother to him? 1003 00:52:29,112 --> 00:52:31,103 Don't worry. It's not genetic. 1004 00:52:33,717 --> 00:52:36,277 They've been through so much, though, 1005 00:52:36,353 --> 00:52:40,847 with Lionel's mom, like, freaking out and splitting when he was so young. 1006 00:52:41,958 --> 00:52:44,791 I don't know, not that we're anywhere near talking about any of this yet. 1007 00:52:44,861 --> 00:52:48,228 Just the fact that you're wondering, though. God. 1008 00:52:48,632 --> 00:52:52,659 I mean the fact is you don't know either of these guys that well. 1009 00:52:53,436 --> 00:52:55,427 Who knows if Jason even wants to have kids? 1010 00:52:55,505 --> 00:52:56,836 Absolutely. 1011 00:52:57,574 --> 00:52:58,973 Four kids. 1012 00:52:59,042 --> 00:53:00,976 And I wanna name the first one Charlie after my father 1013 00:53:01,044 --> 00:53:02,705 and that works if it's a boy or a girl. 1014 00:53:02,779 --> 00:53:06,613 Then I want to design a huge Craftsman house for the whole brood. 1015 00:53:06,683 --> 00:53:07,741 The exhibit's in here. 1016 00:53:07,817 --> 00:53:11,082 Oh, no, no, no. Don't let me in the museum. Too many breakables. 1017 00:53:11,154 --> 00:53:13,418 Don't worry. They're insured. 1018 00:53:14,591 --> 00:53:16,024 Hey, listen. 1019 00:53:16,960 --> 00:53:20,054 I'm sorry I lost my temper with you the other day. 1020 00:53:20,130 --> 00:53:22,223 You felt bad enough already. 1021 00:53:23,099 --> 00:53:25,932 I can be a real ass and I hate that about myself. 1022 00:53:31,208 --> 00:53:33,176 Another family heirloom. 1023 00:53:44,120 --> 00:53:46,645 He buys jewelry. Well, it's a no-brainer. He's the one. 1024 00:53:46,723 --> 00:53:49,385 He felt remorse, Mae. - Well, that's a lovely quality. 1025 00:53:49,459 --> 00:53:52,019 No, he knew he should feel remorse. Oh, my God, Milly. 1026 00:53:52,095 --> 00:53:53,153 Those empanadas are amazing. 1027 00:53:53,230 --> 00:53:55,960 They're gonna be perfect for Mom's party. Oh, my party. 1028 00:53:56,032 --> 00:53:59,263 Mom, what about these for your party? Oh, shoes, please. 1029 00:53:59,336 --> 00:54:02,134 Why are you making such a big deal over this dreaded event? 1030 00:54:02,205 --> 00:54:04,139 Why are we celebrating my descent into oblivion? 1031 00:54:04,207 --> 00:54:06,675 Come on, Mom. It's not that bad. Snap out of it. 1032 00:54:06,743 --> 00:54:11,009 Well, I mean, it is a milestone, and actually, I am taking stock of my life 1033 00:54:11,081 --> 00:54:13,743 and trying to find some peace and quiet in my old age, 1034 00:54:13,817 --> 00:54:17,150 so, Milly, will you please bring Jason to the party? 1035 00:54:17,420 --> 00:54:20,787 I would just love to meet him. That's all I'm asking. 1036 00:54:20,857 --> 00:54:23,189 I understand, but isn't it my choice who I bring? 1037 00:54:23,260 --> 00:54:25,057 I think it is. Thank you. 1038 00:54:25,228 --> 00:54:26,889 All right. 1039 00:54:27,264 --> 00:54:28,424 Okay. 1040 00:54:31,434 --> 00:54:32,492 Oh. 1042 00:54:37,507 --> 00:54:39,338 Oh, my God. 1043 00:54:39,409 --> 00:54:43,038 Mom, Eli says that's what I say right before I... 1044 00:54:43,113 --> 00:54:44,740 No kidding? Me, too. 1045 00:54:44,814 --> 00:54:46,111 And, you know, it was funny, 1046 00:54:46,182 --> 00:54:48,480 the other night, we hadn't had sex in so long, by the third one, 1047 00:54:48,551 --> 00:54:50,815 I was setting off the car alarms in the neighborhood, 1048 00:54:50,887 --> 00:54:52,115 and dogs were barking... 1049 00:54:52,188 --> 00:54:54,418 Three? Is that normal? 1050 00:54:54,491 --> 00:54:56,959 Please. Everyone knows I hold the record in this family. 1051 00:55:02,165 --> 00:55:03,962 Why are you so quiet? 1052 00:55:05,468 --> 00:55:07,663 'Cause she's doing the Oompa-Loompa with two guys, Mom. 1053 00:55:07,737 --> 00:55:09,728 Stop it. What? 1054 00:55:09,939 --> 00:55:11,270 Wait a minute. 1055 00:55:11,374 --> 00:55:14,138 At this point, are you doing it with both of them at once? 1056 00:55:14,210 --> 00:55:16,542 No. I'm not. Absolutely not. 1057 00:55:26,356 --> 00:55:30,019 Honey, I've been thinking about your situation with Jason. 1058 00:55:30,493 --> 00:55:33,826 Mom, I didn't ask for this. It happened to me. 1060 00:55:40,370 --> 00:55:42,361 So move on. 1061 00:55:54,117 --> 00:55:55,641 No. It happened to you. 1062 00:55:55,719 --> 00:55:59,780 Things have gotten so out of hand I broke my first bundt cake. 1063 00:56:10,734 --> 00:56:13,066 Has anybody seen my G.I. Joe? 1064 00:56:13,136 --> 00:56:14,797 Believe me, it's not in here. 1065 00:56:15,238 --> 00:56:16,705 I left it on the bed. 1066 00:56:16,773 --> 00:56:18,138 ...that it happened to you. 1067 00:56:18,208 --> 00:56:21,075 You're making me hate you and I don't ever want to see your face... 1068 00:56:23,847 --> 00:56:25,280 With that Johnny... 1070 00:56:27,384 --> 00:56:29,443 Happy birthday, Mom. 1071 00:56:29,519 --> 00:56:30,543 Happy birthday, Mom. Happy birthday. 1072 00:56:30,620 --> 00:56:32,884 Your favorite butterscotch cake. We made it. 1073 00:56:32,956 --> 00:56:35,220 Well, some of us made it. - We helped, okay? 1074 00:56:35,625 --> 00:56:37,183 It's really yummy. I tried some. All right. 1075 00:56:37,260 --> 00:56:39,194 Make a wish, make a wish. Make a wish, Mom. 1076 00:56:39,262 --> 00:56:41,253 Come on, make a wish, make a wish. Make a wish, make a wish. 1078 00:56:57,013 --> 00:56:59,072 Happy birthday. We love you, Mom. 1079 00:56:59,149 --> 00:57:01,583 I'd like to propose a toast. 1080 00:57:01,651 --> 00:57:04,586 To the incredibly unique Daphne Wilder, 1081 00:57:04,654 --> 00:57:09,956 the fearless leader of the Wilder women, who I hope to someday call family. 1082 00:57:10,627 --> 00:57:12,322 You've created a wonderful family, 1083 00:57:12,395 --> 00:57:14,863 and I hope when my folks stop through town, 1084 00:57:14,931 --> 00:57:17,695 that Milly'll charm them as much as she's charmed me. 1085 00:57:18,802 --> 00:57:20,099 Cheers. 1086 00:57:20,170 --> 00:57:21,933 Cheers. Cheers. 1087 00:57:22,005 --> 00:57:23,700 Cheers. - Cheers. 1088 00:57:23,773 --> 00:57:25,502 Thank you so much. 1089 00:57:25,575 --> 00:57:27,372 Thank you, thank you. 1090 00:57:27,444 --> 00:57:30,709 What was that exactly? Did you know he was gonna do that? 1091 00:57:32,115 --> 00:57:34,709 Did he just propose? Because I think he just proposed. 1092 00:57:34,784 --> 00:57:37,048 I think he did. The question is, to who? 1093 00:57:37,120 --> 00:57:39,714 Maggie, stop being a killjoy. All right, girls, what do you think? 1094 00:57:39,789 --> 00:57:41,689 He seems well-read. He's tall. 1095 00:57:41,758 --> 00:57:44,022 Okay, you guys don't like him at all. Don't listen to your sisters. 1096 00:57:44,093 --> 00:57:46,254 For God's sake, sweetie, do not listen to them. 1097 00:57:46,329 --> 00:57:47,353 Here's what I'm thinking. 1098 00:57:47,430 --> 00:57:49,625 I'm thinking his parents are from Connecticut. 1099 00:57:49,699 --> 00:57:50,996 They're a little conservative, 1100 00:57:51,067 --> 00:57:53,365 so maybe you should just wear your pleated skirt. 1101 00:57:53,436 --> 00:57:55,870 Just this once, honey? Stop. 1102 00:57:55,939 --> 00:57:58,373 It's just a gesture, just make them more comfortable. 1103 00:57:58,441 --> 00:58:01,877 I understand it's a gesture but, Mom, this is moving very quickly. 1104 00:58:01,945 --> 00:58:04,971 He just said all of this. It's... Milly, don't fight it. 1105 00:58:05,048 --> 00:58:06,208 This is the way it's supposed to be. 1106 00:58:06,282 --> 00:58:07,977 You're just not used to feeling pursued and adored. 1107 00:58:08,418 --> 00:58:10,318 I hate pleated skirts. 1108 00:58:10,787 --> 00:58:13,551 Isn't this about the time we were going to sing? 1109 00:58:13,623 --> 00:58:15,887 That's a great idea. Come on, Mils. Yes, yes. 1110 00:58:18,061 --> 00:58:20,222 Well, I met him on a Sunday 1111 00:58:20,296 --> 00:58:21,593 My voice. 1112 00:58:27,103 --> 00:58:30,595 And I missed him on Monday 1113 00:58:34,777 --> 00:58:36,642 Not bad. What do you got going, Mom? 1114 00:58:36,713 --> 00:58:40,012 And I dated him Wednesday 1115 00:58:45,855 --> 00:58:47,482 I said bye-bye, baby 1116 00:58:47,557 --> 00:58:49,024 Nice. Yes. 1117 00:59:00,637 --> 00:59:03,071 Milly? Will you take the soprano? 1118 00:59:06,075 --> 00:59:07,906 You know, that's it. That's it. 1119 00:59:07,977 --> 00:59:10,138 No, no. You're so out of control. 1120 00:59:10,213 --> 00:59:11,305 What'd I do this time? 1121 00:59:11,381 --> 00:59:13,281 You're forcing me. Jason's here. You're making me... 1122 00:59:13,349 --> 00:59:15,840 So, Jason, can I get you another one of these? 1123 00:59:15,919 --> 00:59:16,908 Will I need one? 1124 00:59:16,986 --> 00:59:18,851 Oh, yeah. They're just getting started. 1125 00:59:18,922 --> 00:59:20,355 Who wants lavender ice cream? 1126 00:59:20,423 --> 00:59:21,788 No, no, no. No, no, no. 1127 00:59:21,858 --> 00:59:24,588 You're not gonna go. You're out of control. Milly's right. 1128 00:59:24,661 --> 00:59:27,061 I don't know how she can take it. I can't. I can't take it anymore. 1129 00:59:27,130 --> 00:59:32,124 Well, excuse me for just one moment here. I thought that this was my birthday. 1130 00:59:32,201 --> 00:59:34,829 My very big, special birthday. 1131 00:59:34,904 --> 00:59:36,531 Yes, Mom. It's your big, special birthday. 1132 00:59:36,606 --> 00:59:37,630 That's how you should remember 1133 00:59:37,707 --> 00:59:38,867 you're too old... Old? 1134 00:59:38,942 --> 00:59:41,809 Not too old, but too old to be doing this to Milly. 1135 00:59:41,878 --> 00:59:43,778 You're pushing her like you pushed her into Girl Scouts. 1136 00:59:43,846 --> 00:59:45,575 Thank you very much. I'm not ten years old anymore. 1137 00:59:45,648 --> 00:59:46,706 You have to stop. Yeah. 1138 00:59:46,783 --> 00:59:47,977 You have to change at some point. 1139 00:59:48,051 --> 00:59:52,681 Fine. But I just want you girls to understand something about motherhood, okay? 1140 00:59:52,755 --> 00:59:53,915 Mom. 1141 00:59:53,990 --> 00:59:55,048 Okay? - Yeah, okay. 1142 00:59:55,124 --> 00:59:57,854 I mean, it is the most impossible love. 1143 00:59:57,927 --> 01:00:01,419 You tell me when it ends. You tell me when it stops. 1144 01:00:01,497 --> 01:00:06,764 All I know is, it's absolutely fine for me to teach you how to walk and talk, 1145 01:00:06,836 --> 01:00:11,000 and then you grow up and you head off in the wrong direction toward a cliff. 1146 01:00:11,074 --> 01:00:13,975 And I'm supposed to just stand there and wave and go, 1147 01:00:14,043 --> 01:00:18,537 "Well, kids, good luck. It's Mom. I'm here." Well, I can't do that. 1148 01:00:19,315 --> 01:00:21,579 What am I supposed to do, huh? 1149 01:00:21,651 --> 01:00:26,748 Am I supposed to just put my feet up at the end of the day and say to myself, 1150 01:00:26,823 --> 01:00:32,693 "Well, you know, they're on their own and she says she's fine." 1151 01:00:32,762 --> 01:00:33,854 Well, you won't be. 1152 01:00:33,930 --> 01:00:35,591 Just stop it. God damn it. 1153 01:00:35,665 --> 01:00:37,895 You are making me crazy and you're never gonna change 1154 01:00:37,967 --> 01:00:39,525 'cause you don't even know when you're doing it. 1155 01:00:39,602 --> 01:00:42,230 Oh, well, I am gonna stop as in right now. 1156 01:00:42,305 --> 01:00:47,333 So, let me tell you, I am washing my hands of your emotional problems. 1157 01:00:47,410 --> 01:00:52,177 I'm just a visitor with a limited day pass from here on in. 1158 01:00:52,248 --> 01:00:54,808 Oh, my God, I can't even talk. 1159 01:00:54,884 --> 01:00:55,873 Mom. 1161 01:00:59,222 --> 01:01:00,211 Oh, my... Great. 1162 01:01:00,289 --> 01:01:03,554 She loses her voice and we are three days from Hungarian flu. 1163 01:01:03,626 --> 01:01:05,594 You guys, the last time I had her at my house, 1164 01:01:05,662 --> 01:01:07,960 Derek and I were in therapy for two months. I can't do it with this. 1165 01:01:08,031 --> 01:01:10,556 No, no, no. I know it's my turn technically, but you cannot... 1166 01:01:10,633 --> 01:01:12,567 We can't be in the same room together right now. 1167 01:01:12,635 --> 01:01:14,432 Rock, Paper, Scissor. 1168 01:01:14,904 --> 01:01:17,168 Rock, Paper... Fine, fine, fine. 1169 01:01:17,407 --> 01:01:18,874 Hi. Oh, Ma, I'll take that. 1170 01:01:18,941 --> 01:01:21,432 We know you're about to get sick, so we're gonna Rock, Paper, Scissors 1171 01:01:21,511 --> 01:01:22,876 to see whose house you're gonna stay at. 1172 01:01:22,945 --> 01:01:25,209 'Cause you know what, Mom? We all want you to stay. 1173 01:01:25,281 --> 01:01:26,578 We're fighting for you. 1174 01:01:26,649 --> 01:01:29,174 Let's declare, guys. Please? Okay. 1175 01:01:36,092 --> 01:01:39,084 Oh, you win, Mils. That's great. 1176 01:01:40,897 --> 01:01:42,626 Have fun, you guys. 1177 01:01:43,933 --> 01:01:44,763 What for? 1178 01:01:44,834 --> 01:01:48,497 'Cause I'm here with you. Women prefer him, as a rule. 1179 01:01:49,305 --> 01:01:51,102 Shall we take a walk? 1180 01:01:51,908 --> 01:01:53,239 Yes, let's. 1181 01:01:53,543 --> 01:01:54,635 What? 1182 01:01:54,777 --> 01:01:55,869 Where is he now? 1183 01:01:55,945 --> 01:01:59,108 "You don't need to take care of me." 1184 01:01:59,582 --> 01:02:03,382 "Go out and have fun with Jason." 1185 01:02:04,387 --> 01:02:06,582 No. No. Why? 1186 01:02:08,291 --> 01:02:11,089 "Because I said so." 1187 01:02:11,928 --> 01:02:14,089 No. I'm not leaving. 1188 01:02:14,163 --> 01:02:17,621 They say dogs feel disoriented when they get debarked. 1189 01:02:20,236 --> 01:02:21,601 You're nice, too. 1190 01:02:22,138 --> 01:02:23,127 No. 1191 01:02:24,774 --> 01:02:26,401 Yes. No, please. 1192 01:02:30,279 --> 01:02:33,737 "Now there was a man who knew how to be a man." 1193 01:02:33,816 --> 01:02:34,805 Mmm-hmm. 1194 01:02:35,952 --> 01:02:38,921 "There's turkey meatloaf in the fridge." 1195 01:02:40,223 --> 01:02:42,783 "What's an orgasm feel like?" 1196 01:03:02,411 --> 01:03:03,673 Amazing? 1197 01:03:04,313 --> 01:03:06,781 I don't know. Amazing, and... 1198 01:03:06,849 --> 01:03:08,077 Like... 1199 01:03:09,952 --> 01:03:12,785 Like being totally out of control. 1200 01:03:13,556 --> 01:03:14,955 Just like... 1201 01:03:18,728 --> 01:03:20,696 "No, I wouldn't like that." 1202 01:03:20,763 --> 01:03:24,221 Yes, you would. Oh, Mom, no, no, no. It's not like being drunk. 1203 01:03:24,567 --> 01:03:27,900 It's just satisfying and... 1204 01:03:30,006 --> 01:03:31,564 Like you're out of your body, 1205 01:03:31,641 --> 01:03:35,168 but you're in your body, and your toes curl under... 1206 01:03:35,244 --> 01:03:38,736 That doesn't sound delicious, I know, but, God, it's so delicious, Mom. 1207 01:03:38,815 --> 01:03:41,545 And you can laugh or cry, but like a good cry. 1208 01:03:41,617 --> 01:03:44,177 I mean, I've cried before. It's just like... 1209 01:03:50,560 --> 01:03:52,221 You know, just... 1210 01:03:53,162 --> 01:03:55,653 Oh, my God, I can't believe I just said that to you. 1211 01:03:55,731 --> 01:03:59,292 I'm not explaining it right. I'm not explaining it right. 1212 01:04:01,871 --> 01:04:04,339 Didn't you ever have one with Dad? 1213 01:04:07,810 --> 01:04:12,076 "He said he didn't have all day and he worked nights." 1214 01:04:20,723 --> 01:04:22,054 Oh, Mom. 1215 01:05:14,243 --> 01:05:16,234 "Don't tell your sisters I asked." 1217 01:05:58,387 --> 01:05:59,581 Hello? 1218 01:06:00,189 --> 01:06:02,157 No, I'm sorry. She can't come to the phone right now. 1219 01:06:02,224 --> 01:06:04,055 Can I take a message? 1220 01:06:06,295 --> 01:06:08,889 You're calling about the personal ad? 1221 01:06:11,500 --> 01:06:14,492 Are you sure that you have the right number? 1222 01:06:14,570 --> 01:06:16,800 Yeah, Daphne Wilder. 1223 01:06:17,907 --> 01:06:20,205 Okay. Bye-bye. 1224 01:06:22,912 --> 01:06:25,642 Just a little belated birthday gift. 1225 01:06:26,549 --> 01:06:27,538 You like it? 1226 01:06:27,616 --> 01:06:31,143 See, it brought me luck, so I thought maybe it would bring you luck. 1227 01:06:31,220 --> 01:06:33,211 Oh, do you like it, Mom? 1228 01:06:34,056 --> 01:06:36,547 Mom? I know. 1229 01:06:38,461 --> 01:06:41,396 I know all about your little ad. 1230 01:06:41,464 --> 01:06:43,295 And I think it's so great. 1231 01:06:43,366 --> 01:06:46,199 It's so bold and so brave of you 1232 01:06:46,268 --> 01:06:48,736 and finally it shows me that you heard us at your birthday party. 1233 01:06:48,804 --> 01:06:50,431 You're trying to live your own life. 1234 01:06:50,506 --> 01:06:51,996 And I want you to know, Mom, 1235 01:06:52,074 --> 01:06:55,840 you don't have to go through the personals to find love, 'cause that can be so... 1236 01:06:55,911 --> 01:06:57,344 Terrifying. 1237 01:07:00,516 --> 01:07:04,714 Jason's uncle is coming into town next week with his parents 1238 01:07:04,787 --> 01:07:06,482 and he's dying to meet you, Mom. 1239 01:07:06,555 --> 01:07:08,819 Jason says he's, like, the most amazing guy in the entire world 1240 01:07:08,891 --> 01:07:10,722 and I haven't even really told him about the... 1241 01:07:10,793 --> 01:07:13,193 All right, all right, fine. Fine. 1242 01:07:15,898 --> 01:07:17,889 Why didn't you marry? 1243 01:07:17,967 --> 01:07:20,834 I didn't know what the war was like then. 1244 01:07:21,570 --> 01:07:23,561 If I had it to do over again, I'd marry him. 1246 01:07:25,975 --> 01:07:28,307 When I joined up, I remember... 1248 01:07:34,984 --> 01:07:36,076 Hello. 1249 01:07:36,152 --> 01:07:38,313 Is this Milly Wilder's home? 1250 01:07:39,588 --> 01:07:42,421 I'm Joe Dresden, I'm Johnny's father. 1251 01:07:43,459 --> 01:07:45,256 Are you Milly's mom? 1252 01:07:50,066 --> 01:07:52,626 This is Lionel, this is Johnny's boy. 1253 01:07:54,570 --> 01:07:55,559 "Daphne." 1254 01:07:56,739 --> 01:07:59,299 "Can't talk." Well, it's overrated. 1255 01:08:01,310 --> 01:08:03,005 Sign? Do you sign? 1256 01:08:08,317 --> 01:08:09,807 "Laryingitis." 1257 01:08:10,553 --> 01:08:13,420 Laryngitis. That's the alternate spelling, I guess. 1258 01:08:13,489 --> 01:08:16,287 I know Johnny had a date with Milly tonight and I was hoping to catch him. 1259 01:08:16,358 --> 01:08:17,723 I can't reach him on his cell phone. 1260 01:08:17,793 --> 01:08:23,197 I stupidly misplaced my keys and I can't get back into our house. 1261 01:08:43,052 --> 01:08:44,747 They're beautiful. 1262 01:08:44,820 --> 01:08:48,051 Three girls, huh? And all by yourself. 1263 01:08:48,357 --> 01:08:50,587 That couldn't have been easy. 1264 01:08:51,894 --> 01:08:55,125 Yeah, yeah, I know, but still, it had to be tough. 1265 01:08:59,301 --> 01:09:01,394 "There's tougher things." 1266 01:09:01,470 --> 01:09:04,439 Yeah, like trying to give you a compliment. 1267 01:09:09,378 --> 01:09:13,007 You know, what could be good for that throat 1268 01:09:13,082 --> 01:09:15,642 is a couple of drops of brandy. 1269 01:09:16,919 --> 01:09:19,581 Mine's feeling a little scratchy, too. 1270 01:09:32,902 --> 01:09:34,062 Shall we take a walk? 1271 01:09:34,136 --> 01:09:35,728 We could get along. 1272 01:09:35,804 --> 01:09:36,828 Couldn't we? 1273 01:09:37,973 --> 01:09:40,339 You're sweet. No, I'm not. 1274 01:09:40,409 --> 01:09:42,172 Yes, you're a dear. 1275 01:09:43,479 --> 01:09:45,003 What are you thinking about now? 1276 01:09:45,080 --> 01:09:48,516 About how nice it is. And you're nice, too. 1277 01:09:54,356 --> 01:09:56,824 Besides, you're so very beautiful. 1278 01:09:59,261 --> 01:10:02,628 I'd be very glad to have you kiss me now if you don't mind. 1279 01:10:07,169 --> 01:10:09,296 Women prefer him, as a rule. 1280 01:10:16,378 --> 01:10:18,608 Where is he now? Who? 1281 01:10:18,681 --> 01:10:21,844 The boy you're engaged to. He's dead. 1282 01:10:25,621 --> 01:10:28,647 He was killed in the Somme. 1283 01:10:28,724 --> 01:10:30,453 Were you engaged long? 1284 01:10:30,526 --> 01:10:32,187 Eight years. We grew up together. 1285 01:10:32,861 --> 01:10:36,558 Why didn't you marry? I didn't know what the war was like then. 1286 01:10:40,002 --> 01:10:42,971 If I had it to do over again, I'd marry him. 1287 01:10:48,944 --> 01:10:51,310 When I joined up, I remember having this silly idea 1288 01:10:51,380 --> 01:10:54,008 that he might come to the hospital where I was. 1289 01:11:16,171 --> 01:11:19,971 Now we've got our basic tomato sauce. I took out about two-thirds of it, 1290 01:11:20,042 --> 01:11:21,600 because if there's any mistake 1291 01:11:21,677 --> 01:11:25,670 that American cooks make when they're cooking pasta, 1292 01:11:25,748 --> 01:11:27,739 is that they tend to over-sauce it. 1293 01:11:27,816 --> 01:11:29,374 They put too much stuff on. 1294 01:11:29,451 --> 01:11:31,180 In Italy, the main event is the noodle 1295 01:11:31,253 --> 01:11:34,518 and the rest is just the dressing, very much like we dress salads. 1296 01:11:34,590 --> 01:11:37,616 Now, I've got it in there. I'm allowing it to start... 1297 01:11:44,133 --> 01:11:45,395 Hello. 1298 01:11:51,540 --> 01:11:52,598 Hi. - Hi. 1299 01:11:56,845 --> 01:11:57,834 Hi. 1300 01:11:58,914 --> 01:12:00,245 Hi. 1301 01:12:00,316 --> 01:12:02,648 We were worried sick about you. 1302 01:12:03,285 --> 01:12:06,812 It's nice to see you again, Milly. You, too. 1303 01:12:07,323 --> 01:12:08,813 It's a great night, isn't it? 1304 01:12:08,891 --> 01:12:11,257 It's one for the books. - Yeah. 1305 01:12:12,728 --> 01:12:14,559 She has a 'gina, too. 1306 01:12:15,264 --> 01:12:16,424 Lionel. 1307 01:12:18,100 --> 01:12:19,362 As Grants, 1308 01:12:19,902 --> 01:12:22,393 we Grant you health, we Grant you happiness, 1309 01:12:22,471 --> 01:12:25,440 we Grant you someone else to water your plants. 1310 01:12:26,141 --> 01:12:27,130 Cheers. 1311 01:12:28,577 --> 01:12:30,169 Definitely. Cheers. 1312 01:12:30,245 --> 01:12:31,678 Reggie's the toast giver. 1313 01:12:31,747 --> 01:12:33,578 He's the real talker in the family. I see. 1314 01:12:33,649 --> 01:12:35,583 Can somebody get me another bourbon and soda on the rocks? 1315 01:12:35,651 --> 01:12:37,346 Oh, no, no, no, you can't order bourbon... 1316 01:12:37,419 --> 01:12:40,081 They seem to be hitting it off. 1317 01:12:40,155 --> 01:12:41,486 Definitely. Yeah. 1318 01:12:42,491 --> 01:12:45,517 Beautiful. I don't think so. And then I want you to try the buffalo filet 1319 01:12:45,594 --> 01:12:47,289 while we're here. Yeah. 1320 01:12:47,363 --> 01:12:50,264 You know, the buffalo was an endangered species up until a couple of years ago 1321 01:12:50,332 --> 01:12:51,390 and now we're eating them. 1322 01:12:51,467 --> 01:12:53,230 Isn't this great, Mom? 1323 01:12:55,604 --> 01:12:57,196 ...and you look out over the fields 1324 01:12:57,272 --> 01:13:00,139 and what you see are herds of commercial buffalo. 1325 01:13:00,209 --> 01:13:02,336 And then you also see herds of... 1326 01:13:02,911 --> 01:13:05,880 I had a great time. Please tell your parents good night for me, okay? 1327 01:13:05,948 --> 01:13:07,973 Good night. Good night. 1328 01:13:16,625 --> 01:13:19,458 Tell me you're not seeing that guy. Are you, Milly? 1329 01:13:20,596 --> 01:13:22,393 Yes, but I don't... 1330 01:13:22,464 --> 01:13:24,659 Actually, the "yes" is all I needed to know. 1331 01:13:24,733 --> 01:13:27,497 No, no, no, but the "but" part's really important too. 1332 01:13:27,569 --> 01:13:29,503 But what? Not him. 1333 01:13:30,139 --> 01:13:31,128 Why? 1334 01:13:31,206 --> 01:13:34,107 'Cause he looks like some guy your mother would love. 1335 01:13:34,176 --> 01:13:35,234 Johnny, wait, though. 1336 01:13:35,310 --> 01:13:37,471 This is really difficult for me and I've never been here before. 1337 01:13:37,546 --> 01:13:38,808 I don't know how to navigate this. 1338 01:13:38,881 --> 01:13:41,975 Oh, poor thing. Don't talk to me that way. 1339 01:13:42,050 --> 01:13:43,608 Oh, I'm sorry. What was I thinking? 1340 01:13:43,685 --> 01:13:46,984 You're involved with this guy to the point where you're meeting his family 1341 01:13:47,055 --> 01:13:49,751 and I should be careful how I'm talking to you? 1342 01:13:51,727 --> 01:13:53,820 Are you sleeping with him? 1343 01:13:59,067 --> 01:14:01,262 I wouldn't say it that way. 1344 01:14:03,372 --> 01:14:05,670 Well, what way would you say it? 1345 01:14:10,379 --> 01:14:12,813 Are you going to stop seeing him? 1346 01:14:15,918 --> 01:14:18,011 That pause says it all. No, it doesn't. 1347 01:14:18,086 --> 01:14:19,781 That's not true. That's not true. 1348 01:14:19,855 --> 01:14:22,221 Who are you? I can't even look at you. 1349 01:14:28,096 --> 01:14:29,358 Oh, God. 1350 01:14:29,932 --> 01:14:31,194 Oh, God. 1351 01:14:32,768 --> 01:14:35,532 The train has been delayed. 1355 01:14:44,012 --> 01:14:47,413 The train has been delayed. Scusi, I'm gonna go check on the souffl�s. 1357 01:14:58,861 --> 01:15:00,226 Oh, no. 1358 01:15:02,464 --> 01:15:03,795 Oh, no. 1359 01:15:04,666 --> 01:15:08,727 Jason's finally met such a wonderful girl. 1360 01:15:08,804 --> 01:15:13,571 She's so sweet. She has the loveliest spirit about her. 1361 01:15:13,642 --> 01:15:18,136 But I still can't believe he found her on the Internet. 1362 01:15:18,213 --> 01:15:20,147 Not like in our day. 1363 01:15:20,215 --> 01:15:21,580 That somehow reminds me 1364 01:15:21,650 --> 01:15:25,108 of people writing a phone number on the bathroom wall. 1365 01:15:31,860 --> 01:15:34,988 Sweetie, I think that we should... Are you dating somebody else? 1366 01:15:35,063 --> 01:15:36,052 What? 1367 01:15:36,798 --> 01:15:38,629 I just heard your mom on the phone talk about 1368 01:15:38,700 --> 01:15:40,964 how you're dating some girl you met on the Internet. 1369 01:15:41,036 --> 01:15:43,402 Oh, it's nothing like that at all. 1370 01:15:43,472 --> 01:15:47,101 I'm surprised and I don't even know if I have the right to be, 1371 01:15:47,175 --> 01:15:48,904 'cause to be honest, I feel like I need to tell you 1372 01:15:48,977 --> 01:15:52,105 that I'm also dating somebody else. 1373 01:15:54,683 --> 01:15:58,983 Well, first of all, to be honest, you didn't need to be so honest. 1374 01:15:59,588 --> 01:16:01,886 I'm not seeing anyone but you. 1375 01:16:02,558 --> 01:16:06,961 But since we're being honest, this is something that I was saving for later. 1376 01:16:12,301 --> 01:16:13,427 What? 1377 01:16:15,938 --> 01:16:17,701 My mother's personal ad? 1378 01:16:22,110 --> 01:16:25,011 Oh, my God. 1379 01:16:25,514 --> 01:16:27,539 You sounded just like her there. 1380 01:16:27,616 --> 01:16:29,174 Oh, my God. Oh, my God. 1381 01:16:29,251 --> 01:16:31,446 Hey, hey, hey. What does it matter how we met? 1382 01:16:31,520 --> 01:16:33,579 You and my mom have been totally scheming 1383 01:16:33,655 --> 01:16:35,850 and now I know exactly why she pushed me on you. 1384 01:16:35,924 --> 01:16:38,222 Because she was voting for you. She found you. 1385 01:16:38,293 --> 01:16:40,318 Yeah, and it doesn't take anything away from us. 1386 01:16:40,395 --> 01:16:44,024 What matters is that we did meet and how good this is between us. 1387 01:16:44,099 --> 01:16:45,157 And the truth of that... 1388 01:16:45,233 --> 01:16:47,565 The truth? Where's the truth? Where's the truth? 1389 01:16:47,636 --> 01:16:50,298 Because you've been living a lie and I've been lying to you, Jason. 1390 01:16:50,372 --> 01:16:51,737 And it doesn't change anything. 1391 01:16:51,807 --> 01:16:53,604 How does that not change everything? 1392 01:16:53,675 --> 01:16:58,009 Because you're here. I think you already made your choice. 1393 01:16:58,080 --> 01:16:59,911 But if it helps, I'll say it. 1394 01:16:59,982 --> 01:17:03,213 Stop seeing him. Then you and I can get closer. 1395 01:17:04,086 --> 01:17:07,487 Close enough to spend the rest of our lives together. 1396 01:17:07,990 --> 01:17:09,787 I knew I had you the day I met you. 1397 01:17:09,858 --> 01:17:11,450 How could you know something like that? 1398 01:17:11,526 --> 01:17:12,788 'Cause you were so nervous, 1399 01:17:12,861 --> 01:17:16,353 you laughed like a hyena in that beautiful polka dot dress of yours. 1400 01:17:16,431 --> 01:17:17,591 Really? 1401 01:17:17,666 --> 01:17:18,655 Mmm-hmm. 1402 01:17:24,606 --> 01:17:26,403 I'll tell you one thing, though. 1403 01:17:26,475 --> 01:17:28,500 You did not have me the moment that we met 1404 01:17:28,577 --> 01:17:30,169 because I wasn't even sure that I liked the fact 1405 01:17:30,245 --> 01:17:33,578 that your staff talked about you behind your back at the dessert table. 1406 01:17:33,649 --> 01:17:35,480 And, excuse me, but, truth be told, 1407 01:17:35,550 --> 01:17:37,108 I didn't like anything that you ordered for me 1408 01:17:37,185 --> 01:17:38,948 on our first date, except the calamari. 1409 01:17:39,021 --> 01:17:41,956 And okay, fine, yes, it was nice to not have to think for a change, 1410 01:17:42,024 --> 01:17:44,822 but who wants someone who doesn't think? 1411 01:17:44,893 --> 01:17:49,353 Look, and sometimes you laugh when I cry and say, "Huh?" when I make perfect sense. 1412 01:17:49,431 --> 01:17:54,061 And never, ever, in my life have I burned a chocolate souffl� until now 1413 01:17:54,136 --> 01:17:55,569 and that, in and of itself, 1414 01:17:55,637 --> 01:17:59,164 oh, my God, should have told me I don't feel like myself around you. 1415 01:17:59,241 --> 01:18:02,699 And I would have decided that a long time ago if it weren't for my mother. 1416 01:18:02,778 --> 01:18:05,713 Because who wants someone who laughs like a hyena 1417 01:18:05,781 --> 01:18:09,808 in a polka dot dress that my mother made me buy? 1418 01:18:12,521 --> 01:18:14,182 I love that dress. 1419 01:18:16,224 --> 01:18:17,714 Take her out. 1420 01:18:31,673 --> 01:18:32,765 Hey. 1421 01:18:35,944 --> 01:18:38,208 Stuart, this is an emergency. Well, should I wait? 1422 01:18:38,280 --> 01:18:40,077 Let's reschedule. But I'm suicidal. 1423 01:18:40,148 --> 01:18:43,083 Oh, wow, this is making me feel like when I was the last pick in kickball... 1424 01:18:43,151 --> 01:18:46,086 Right and that's exactly where we'll begin next week. 1425 01:18:46,154 --> 01:18:50,386 Maggie, you promised me after Willie Matthews, 1426 01:18:50,459 --> 01:18:51,926 you would never lie to me again. 1427 01:18:51,993 --> 01:18:54,553 Oh, Milly Woo, Milly Boo. Stop. 1428 01:18:54,629 --> 01:18:57,029 Well, I'm sorry. Mommy made me promise not to say anything 1429 01:18:57,099 --> 01:18:58,828 or she'd be furious. Mommy? 1430 01:18:58,900 --> 01:19:02,859 Mommy made you promise? Where is your own moral code? 1431 01:19:02,938 --> 01:19:05,463 Your adulthood? Your sisterhood? 1432 01:19:05,540 --> 01:19:06,768 Just... 1433 01:19:10,212 --> 01:19:12,180 I'm feeling rejected by you. Okay. 1434 01:19:12,247 --> 01:19:14,010 And it's bringing up memories of summer camp 1435 01:19:14,082 --> 01:19:17,518 when Jimmy Feldon and Eric Fishman both transferred out of my bunk. 1436 01:19:17,586 --> 01:19:19,349 I totally understand, Stuart. 1437 01:19:19,421 --> 01:19:22,618 Come back today and we'll do a two-hour session at 3:00 p.m. 1438 01:19:24,226 --> 01:19:25,318 Listen, you're right. 1439 01:19:25,393 --> 01:19:28,191 I didn't handle this well and I understand you feel betrayed. 1440 01:19:28,263 --> 01:19:30,857 But, really, isn't some of this anger a little misplaced? 1441 01:19:30,932 --> 01:19:33,560 No, no, Maggie. It's placed exactly where it should be. 1442 01:19:33,635 --> 01:19:36,399 And there is plenty to go around, so don't worry, Mom will be getting hers. 1443 01:19:36,471 --> 01:19:38,063 Okay... Maggie. 1444 01:19:38,940 --> 01:19:41,966 Stuart, I am asking you to empower yourself and leave. 1445 01:19:42,043 --> 01:19:44,170 This could be a huge day for you, Stuart. 1446 01:19:44,246 --> 01:19:47,807 This makes me feel like when I was 13 and no one came to my bar mitzvah. 1447 01:19:47,883 --> 01:19:49,646 Why didn't they come? I don't get it. 1448 01:19:49,718 --> 01:19:51,549 Stuart, you have a blood sugar problem, okay? 1449 01:19:51,620 --> 01:19:53,281 Just get some lunch, you'll be fine. 1450 01:19:53,355 --> 01:19:55,619 Honey, I know this is painful. 1451 01:19:55,690 --> 01:19:57,351 Do you have any snacks in here? 1452 01:19:57,425 --> 01:19:58,824 Third shelf on the right. 1453 01:19:58,894 --> 01:20:00,384 Honey, instead of blaming Mom, 1454 01:20:00,462 --> 01:20:03,625 you should really focus on the fact that both of these guys went along with it. 1455 01:20:03,698 --> 01:20:06,724 I am, I am. Because I just told Jason that... 1456 01:20:07,669 --> 01:20:09,000 Guys... 1457 01:20:11,206 --> 01:20:12,434 Guys? 1458 01:20:16,478 --> 01:20:18,105 That was plural, wasn't it? 1459 01:20:18,180 --> 01:20:20,148 I feel like I don't know what you guys are talking about 1460 01:20:20,215 --> 01:20:22,308 and it's making me feel very much out of the loop, 1461 01:20:22,384 --> 01:20:24,113 and it's making me want to jump out the window. 1462 01:20:24,186 --> 01:20:27,019 Stuart. For ten years, my sister has sat here 1463 01:20:27,088 --> 01:20:29,818 and told me that you're about to commit suicide. 1464 01:20:29,891 --> 01:20:31,051 Well? 1465 01:20:33,628 --> 01:20:36,188 You mean she's been talking about me? 1466 01:20:38,033 --> 01:20:40,968 Wow. God. 1467 01:20:42,771 --> 01:20:45,740 Mom? Are you there? Pick up the phone, Mom. 1468 01:20:46,741 --> 01:20:48,003 Hello? 1469 01:20:50,579 --> 01:20:52,570 You've reached Daphne... You've reached Daphne... 1470 01:20:52,647 --> 01:20:53,773 You've reached Daphne Wilder. 1471 01:20:53,849 --> 01:20:56,545 Please leave a message after the tone. 1472 01:20:59,254 --> 01:21:01,916 Oh, my God. Oh, thank you, dear God. 1473 01:21:08,430 --> 01:21:09,556 Mom. 1474 01:21:16,771 --> 01:21:17,829 Mom. 1475 01:21:17,906 --> 01:21:19,237 Yeah. 1476 01:21:23,678 --> 01:21:24,838 Yeah? 1477 01:21:28,083 --> 01:21:29,072 Yes! 1478 01:21:29,451 --> 01:21:31,351 Oh, my God. Yes, oh, yes! 1479 01:21:32,721 --> 01:21:34,552 Oh, my God! 1481 01:21:35,957 --> 01:21:37,686 Yes. Yes. 1482 01:21:37,759 --> 01:21:39,556 Yes! 1484 01:21:41,463 --> 01:21:43,260 Okay, so the orange-cranberry muffins are in here? 1485 01:21:43,331 --> 01:21:44,355 They're in there. 1486 01:21:44,432 --> 01:21:46,195 And the ones with the nuts are in here too? 1487 01:21:46,268 --> 01:21:47,929 They're in there, too. 1488 01:21:48,003 --> 01:21:49,300 I had a little trouble with the frosting, 1489 01:21:49,371 --> 01:21:50,861 but I know how much you love butter cream. 1490 01:21:50,939 --> 01:21:53,999 Mother, I told you on the phone I need distance. 1491 01:21:54,476 --> 01:21:56,706 Okay. But it's a new recipe. 1492 01:21:56,778 --> 01:21:59,975 Tangerine instead of orange. For a clean slate? 1493 01:22:00,048 --> 01:22:02,573 Why don't you get it? I don't want to see you. 1494 01:22:02,651 --> 01:22:07,281 Milly, if I'm guilty of any crime, it's just that I've just loved you too much. 1495 01:22:07,355 --> 01:22:08,447 Here. 1496 01:22:09,791 --> 01:22:12,624 Milly? It was just so you. I... 1497 01:22:20,101 --> 01:22:21,261 Milly? 1498 01:22:51,032 --> 01:22:53,967 This isn't the way it was supposed to be. 1499 01:22:54,436 --> 01:22:56,666 Welcome to life. 1500 01:22:56,738 --> 01:23:01,675 Yeah, but I mean, how can I be happy if she's not happy, hmm? 1502 01:23:08,616 --> 01:23:11,176 Hey, it's Milly. Leave me a message. 1503 01:23:11,953 --> 01:23:15,616 Milly? It's your mother, Daphne Wilder. 1504 01:23:16,358 --> 01:23:17,950 Please pick up. 1505 01:23:19,127 --> 01:23:20,924 It's been four days. 1506 01:23:23,898 --> 01:23:25,024 Okay. 1507 01:23:30,338 --> 01:23:32,363 What am I gonna do? What am I gonna do? 1508 01:23:32,440 --> 01:23:33,930 What are... Nothing. 1509 01:23:34,776 --> 01:23:36,403 Just do nothing. 1511 01:23:45,687 --> 01:23:48,247 Hey, it's Milly. Leave me a message. 1512 01:23:48,323 --> 01:23:50,223 Hi, Milly. This is your mother. 1513 01:23:50,291 --> 01:23:54,125 Hopefully, you still have a mental picture of me. 1514 01:23:54,195 --> 01:23:57,323 We have the same hands and earlobes 1515 01:23:57,432 --> 01:24:00,424 and love of Bauer pottery. 1516 01:24:00,969 --> 01:24:04,029 I know that you asked me not to call you 1517 01:24:04,739 --> 01:24:05,728 and I respect that. 1518 01:24:05,807 --> 01:24:08,640 I just thought that you might like to know 1519 01:24:08,710 --> 01:24:12,407 that I found Grandma's recipe for your favorite Lady Baltimore cake. 1520 01:24:12,847 --> 01:24:14,712 The one from my third birthday. 1521 01:24:14,783 --> 01:24:17,081 The one from your third birthday. 1522 01:24:17,218 --> 01:24:19,277 You know what, Milly? Okay, you were right about Johnny. 1523 01:24:19,354 --> 01:24:21,151 Obviously, he has more character. 1524 01:24:21,222 --> 01:24:23,554 I mean, he's really a good guy. 1525 01:24:23,792 --> 01:24:28,422 And you should know that he never saw that ad, 1526 01:24:28,496 --> 01:24:30,623 and, in fact, we met by chance. 1527 01:24:30,732 --> 01:24:33,826 He was just an innocent bystander. 1528 01:24:37,572 --> 01:24:41,133 I know that I'm saying too much. I've learned my lesson. 1529 01:24:41,309 --> 01:24:42,333 Good. 1530 01:24:42,544 --> 01:24:46,480 Because, Milly, it's your life. 1531 01:24:47,082 --> 01:24:51,212 Yup, that's right. That's absolutely right. 1532 01:24:53,488 --> 01:24:56,013 Hey, it's Milly. Leave me a message. 1533 01:24:56,091 --> 01:25:01,085 I know you're in there and it's fine with me that you've chosen not to pick up. 1534 01:25:02,464 --> 01:25:06,662 But, Milly, if you're in any way still pulled to Johnny, 1535 01:25:06,734 --> 01:25:10,500 then please don't let your pride or our differences 1536 01:25:10,572 --> 01:25:12,631 come between you and getting what you want 1537 01:25:12,707 --> 01:25:17,201 otherwise, honey, you're gonna end up like some pathetic character 1538 01:25:17,278 --> 01:25:19,473 in a Tennessee Williams play. 1539 01:25:20,582 --> 01:25:23,449 Believe me, I know what I'm talking about. 1540 01:25:25,820 --> 01:25:26,946 Okay. 1541 01:25:48,576 --> 01:25:49,804 Milly... 1542 01:25:50,645 --> 01:25:51,805 Milly? 1543 01:25:54,082 --> 01:25:56,607 I never meant to hurt you, sweetie. 1544 01:25:57,685 --> 01:26:03,453 And I promise I will never ever interfere ever again. 1545 01:26:08,229 --> 01:26:10,493 I was, I was only, I mean... 1546 01:26:14,536 --> 01:26:17,334 I guess what I'm trying to say is 1547 01:26:21,643 --> 01:26:25,306 that I was just trying to protect you from becoming me. 1548 01:26:27,148 --> 01:26:28,672 My sweet girl. 1549 01:26:33,555 --> 01:26:34,681 Mom? 1550 01:26:38,426 --> 01:26:39,757 Hi, honey. 1551 01:26:44,265 --> 01:26:45,664 I miss you. 1552 01:26:47,368 --> 01:26:49,029 I miss you, too. 1553 01:26:58,613 --> 01:27:00,410 Solo on the four chord. 1554 01:27:05,420 --> 01:27:07,854 Alternate the bass line, will you? 1555 01:27:13,161 --> 01:27:15,391 Too late for spring sign-up. 1556 01:27:15,463 --> 01:27:16,953 I've actually been here before. 1557 01:27:17,031 --> 01:27:21,161 I came once on a Tuesday when it was closed, and I just wanted to... 1558 01:27:21,236 --> 01:27:23,796 You know, I can't hear you. I'm sorry. 1559 01:27:24,872 --> 01:27:26,100 Please. 1560 01:27:33,014 --> 01:27:34,413 I miss you. 1561 01:27:36,517 --> 01:27:37,916 I miss us 1562 01:27:39,721 --> 01:27:40,881 and I'm not seeing anybody. 1563 01:27:40,955 --> 01:27:42,183 That doesn't change anything for us, Milly. 1564 01:27:42,257 --> 01:27:45,658 Yeah, but Johnny, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I'm so deeply sorry, 1565 01:27:45,727 --> 01:27:49,254 and I wish I could find a less clich� word for sorry, but... 1566 01:27:52,267 --> 01:27:55,703 It was an aberration. It's not who I am, 1567 01:27:55,770 --> 01:27:59,365 and I know we can't start over, but maybe we could... 1568 01:28:01,542 --> 01:28:03,976 Maybe we could try this again. 1569 01:28:07,615 --> 01:28:09,776 I need to get back up there. 1570 01:28:24,999 --> 01:28:28,935 Okay, you're driving a bus. Seven hundred and fifty people get on. 1571 01:28:29,003 --> 01:28:30,402 Two get off. 1572 01:28:30,805 --> 01:28:32,739 Thirty thousand seventy-one get on. 1573 01:28:32,807 --> 01:28:34,468 Four hundred and five get off. 1574 01:28:34,542 --> 01:28:37,010 A thousand get on and nine hundred and ninety-nine get off. 1575 01:28:37,078 --> 01:28:38,602 Get off. 1576 01:28:38,680 --> 01:28:41,205 What color are the bus driver's eyes? 1577 01:28:41,549 --> 01:28:42,675 I don't know. 1578 01:28:42,750 --> 01:28:45,742 I said you're driving the bus. Get it, dummy? 1579 01:28:46,521 --> 01:28:47,920 You dummy. 1580 01:28:48,323 --> 01:28:49,347 Dummy. 1581 01:28:49,424 --> 01:28:52,621 You did say that, Lionel. That's right. That's so good. 1582 01:28:52,694 --> 01:28:55,288 He did. That is so great. That is so great. 1583 01:28:55,363 --> 01:28:56,387 Want to hear it again? 1584 01:28:56,464 --> 01:28:57,692 Well, I mean, I don't know. 1585 01:28:57,765 --> 01:29:00,598 Actually, I thought you really nailed it that last time, so... 1586 01:29:00,668 --> 01:29:03,193 Didn't he? Just one more time. Please? 1587 01:29:03,271 --> 01:29:04,260 Okay. 1588 01:29:04,339 --> 01:29:05,704 Okay, you're driving a bus. 1589 01:29:05,773 --> 01:29:08,333 Five people get off. Six people get on. Really? 1590 01:29:08,409 --> 01:29:11,139 Seven hundred and seventy-five thousand get on. 1591 01:29:11,212 --> 01:29:12,907 Seven hundred and thirty-five million and one... 1592 01:29:12,980 --> 01:29:14,447 Oh, no. Hey, guys. 1593 01:29:16,417 --> 01:29:18,248 You know, I forgot a few things at the market. 1594 01:29:18,319 --> 01:29:19,411 I'm just gonna... I'll be right back. 1595 01:29:19,487 --> 01:29:21,011 Dad, Dad, you got to hear this punch line. 1596 01:29:21,089 --> 01:29:23,523 Yeah, yeah. You really, really... You have to stick around for this. 1597 01:29:23,591 --> 01:29:25,650 Think you got to, Johnny. 1598 01:29:26,527 --> 01:29:28,154 Okay, now. What is it? 1599 01:29:28,229 --> 01:29:29,924 You are driving a bus. Yeah. 1600 01:29:29,997 --> 01:29:32,363 A billon million catrillion get on. 1601 01:29:32,433 --> 01:29:34,196 I cannot believe you are here. You are truly insane. 1602 01:29:34,268 --> 01:29:35,826 Two hundred billion million get off. 1603 01:29:35,903 --> 01:29:37,200 Well, I... This is a surprise to you? 1604 01:29:37,271 --> 01:29:38,533 Daphne, you're not listening. 1605 01:29:38,606 --> 01:29:41,769 Honey, oh, no, no. I swear, of course, I'm listening. 1606 01:29:41,843 --> 01:29:45,335 Okay. Dad and Daphne. You're driving a bus. 1607 01:29:45,413 --> 01:29:49,349 Five hundred catrillion cazillion get on. 1608 01:29:49,417 --> 01:29:51,681 But zero... Lionel, look. 1609 01:29:51,753 --> 01:29:53,220 A blimp. Where? 1610 01:29:53,287 --> 01:29:54,914 Right there. I can't see it. 1611 01:29:54,989 --> 01:29:57,014 Right there. Look harder. Where? Show me. 1612 01:29:57,091 --> 01:29:59,525 I can't see it. Up, up. Look harder. 1613 01:30:02,764 --> 01:30:06,757 I've wanted to talk to you for the past few days and I haven't had the nerve. 1614 01:30:06,834 --> 01:30:08,995 That I find hard to believe. 1615 01:30:09,504 --> 01:30:11,699 Johnny, you have too much pride. 1616 01:30:11,773 --> 01:30:13,263 I prefer to call it common sense. 1617 01:30:13,341 --> 01:30:16,674 It's pride, and it's a quality you and I share. 1618 01:30:16,744 --> 01:30:19,838 It's an admirable one, until it becomes a wall. 1619 01:30:20,181 --> 01:30:22,513 "Well, yes, I am alone, 1620 01:30:22,583 --> 01:30:25,711 "but at least I have my righteous anger to keep me company at night." 1621 01:30:25,787 --> 01:30:27,778 Come on, that's not a life, and you know it. 1622 01:30:27,855 --> 01:30:30,346 And let's face it. I mean, if it wasn't for me, 1623 01:30:30,425 --> 01:30:33,656 obviously Milly never would have betrayed you in the first place. 1624 01:30:33,728 --> 01:30:35,559 So what are you doing, Johnny? What are you doing? 1625 01:30:35,630 --> 01:30:38,360 Why waste one more minute of your life? 1626 01:30:39,667 --> 01:30:41,259 And I'm right. 1627 01:30:41,335 --> 01:30:43,633 I'm so right. 1628 01:30:44,338 --> 01:30:45,805 Damn it. 1629 01:30:45,873 --> 01:30:47,568 For once, she is. 1630 01:30:50,912 --> 01:30:53,176 Jeez, you guys, no one's listening. 1631 01:30:53,247 --> 01:30:55,909 If Milly was here, she would get my joke. 1632 01:30:55,983 --> 01:30:59,783 You're driving a bus. Ten people get on. Ten people get off. 1633 01:30:59,854 --> 01:31:03,187 Thirty thousand get on. Thirty thousand get off. A million get on... 1634 01:31:03,858 --> 01:31:05,621 See, that's the fun of the tuna pasta toss, 1635 01:31:05,693 --> 01:31:07,854 'cause it's delicious and it's easy, 1636 01:31:07,929 --> 01:31:09,521 because when you're cooking for one, 1637 01:31:09,597 --> 01:31:12,191 it's really important to look forward to the end result. You know? 1638 01:31:12,266 --> 01:31:14,826 What if you want to make it for two? 1639 01:31:20,341 --> 01:31:25,574 It's a little bit more complicated, but I think it can be done. 1640 01:31:31,519 --> 01:31:33,077 I see some of you have gone ahead 1641 01:31:33,154 --> 01:31:36,487 and already added your carrots and your pickled relish. 1642 01:31:36,557 --> 01:31:38,616 And remember that some people like dill. 1643 01:31:38,693 --> 01:31:42,060 Even before I met you, I had an instinct about you. 1644 01:31:42,497 --> 01:31:46,194 And once I saw you were a woman with profound static cling, 1645 01:31:46,267 --> 01:31:48,861 I wanted to be that force around you. 1646 01:31:49,837 --> 01:31:53,034 Personally, I love dill. I think it's not used enough 1647 01:31:53,107 --> 01:31:55,405 and very underrated, sort of, like, mayonnaise, 1648 01:31:55,476 --> 01:31:58,741 and I also really love olive oil for tuna. 1649 01:31:58,813 --> 01:32:02,408 I love that when I breathe you in, you smell of cake batter. 1650 01:32:05,253 --> 01:32:07,585 And I love that you have this insane way 1651 01:32:07,655 --> 01:32:10,920 of talking in circles that makes perfect sense. 1652 01:32:12,193 --> 01:32:13,251 I do? 1653 01:32:14,428 --> 01:32:17,591 'Cause sometimes I feel like nobody understands me but... 1654 01:32:17,665 --> 01:32:18,723 Me. 1655 01:32:19,500 --> 01:32:20,831 I get you. 1656 01:32:23,771 --> 01:32:28,435 That's wonderful. But, you know, my bladder is about to pop. 1657 01:32:28,509 --> 01:32:30,739 Can you hold it for a minute? 1658 01:32:34,782 --> 01:32:37,478 I'm sorry, I'm sorry, guys. Where were we? 1659 01:32:38,619 --> 01:32:41,611 With the tuna pasta and the tuna noodle doodles, 1660 01:32:41,689 --> 01:32:42,951 tuna sandwiches, tuna... 1661 01:32:43,024 --> 01:32:45,322 I love your eyes. 1662 01:32:47,094 --> 01:32:48,925 I even love 1663 01:32:51,165 --> 01:32:52,632 your mother. 1664 01:33:31,772 --> 01:33:34,240 Well, we gotta get this show on the road. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. 1665 01:33:34,308 --> 01:33:36,367 Where is she? Well, it should have started 20 minutes ago. 1666 01:33:36,444 --> 01:33:38,503 That's not like her. I mean, the ceremony has to start soon. 1667 01:33:38,579 --> 01:33:39,944 I don't know where she is, though. 1670 01:33:42,850 --> 01:33:43,839 Oh, my God. 1671 01:33:43,918 --> 01:33:45,909 I'm worried. I hope she's okay. 1672 01:33:45,987 --> 01:33:47,784 Just call her. All right. I'm calling. 1673 01:33:47,855 --> 01:33:49,755 It's her own wedding. 1674 01:33:51,092 --> 01:33:52,992 Oh, no. 1675 01:33:53,628 --> 01:33:54,652 No. 1676 01:33:56,597 --> 01:33:57,928 Hi, honey. 1677 01:33:58,165 --> 01:34:00,656 Hi, Mom. Where are you? 1678 01:34:01,902 --> 01:34:05,099 Honey, I just have to talk to you a little bit later, okay? Mil... 1679 01:34:05,172 --> 01:34:08,972 Oh, my God. I kind of think she's having sex with Joe right now. 1680 01:34:09,043 --> 01:34:10,169 Great. Awesome. 1681 01:34:10,244 --> 01:34:13,145 Would she like us to explain that to all the guests, or just the preacher? 1682 01:34:13,214 --> 01:34:14,704 She is a woman after my own heart. 1683 01:34:14,782 --> 01:34:17,512 All right, Mom? We are gonna give you five more minutes. 1684 01:34:17,585 --> 01:34:19,109 Ten. Ten. 1685 01:34:19,186 --> 01:34:20,517 Mom. Come on. 1686 01:34:20,588 --> 01:34:22,613 Open up the champagne, sweetie. What's the rush? 1687 01:34:22,690 --> 01:34:24,624 Because I said so. 1688 01:34:24,692 --> 01:34:26,421 Mom, don't hang up the phone on me. 1689 01:34:29,497 --> 01:34:31,522 You got soul 1690 01:34:31,599 --> 01:34:33,760 Everybody knows 1691 01:34:33,834 --> 01:34:37,827 That it's all right, it's all right 1692 01:34:39,340 --> 01:34:43,276 When you wake up early in the morning 1693 01:34:43,344 --> 01:34:47,007 Feeling sad, like so many of us do 1694 01:34:48,015 --> 01:34:52,452 Hum a little soul Make life your goal 1695 01:34:52,520 --> 01:34:57,787 Surely something's got to come to you And say it's all right 1696 01:34:57,858 --> 01:34:59,348 It's all right 1697 01:34:59,994 --> 01:35:04,328 It's all right It's all right 1698 01:35:04,398 --> 01:35:06,457 It's all right 1699 01:35:06,534 --> 01:35:08,263 Have a good time 1700 01:35:08,335 --> 01:35:12,328 'Cause it's all right It's all right 1701 01:35:14,008 --> 01:35:16,806 Are we married or what? - All right.