1 00:00:27,861 --> 00:00:31,465 ♪ met her in a border town ♪ 2 00:00:31,532 --> 00:00:34,802 ♪ we proceeded to get down ♪ 3 00:00:34,868 --> 00:00:37,871 ♪ she turned me on ♪ 4 00:00:37,938 --> 00:00:40,408 ♪ I dropped the telephone ♪ 5 00:00:42,443 --> 00:00:46,880 ♪ moonlight hits the Rio Grande ♪ 6 00:00:46,947 --> 00:00:49,817 ♪ and the touch of her hand ♪ 7 00:00:49,883 --> 00:00:53,187 ♪ it makes me high ♪ 8 00:00:53,254 --> 00:00:55,756 ♪ like the fourth of July ♪ 9 00:00:57,425 --> 00:01:01,229 ♪ a bad bandito came into town ♪ 10 00:01:01,295 --> 00:01:05,366 ♪ man, I'm gonna hunt that gringo down ♪ 11 00:01:05,433 --> 00:01:10,604 ♪ but these words keep ringin' in my ears ♪ 12 00:01:12,840 --> 00:01:16,444 ♪ little bit is better than nada ♪ 13 00:01:16,510 --> 00:01:20,414 ♪ sometime you want the whole enchilada ♪ 14 00:01:20,481 --> 00:01:24,218 ♪ little bit is better than nada ♪ 15 00:01:24,285 --> 00:01:27,588 ♪ a little bit or nothin' at all ♪ 16 00:01:48,542 --> 00:01:52,380 ♪ slick and cool was not her style ♪ 17 00:01:52,446 --> 00:01:55,516 ♪ turistas there, they drove her wild ♪ 18 00:01:55,583 --> 00:01:58,886 ♪ the border's the place ♪ 19 00:01:58,952 --> 00:02:01,589 ♪ put on a brand-new face ♪ 20 00:02:03,691 --> 00:02:07,628 ♪ me and the boys were just in town ♪ 21 00:02:07,695 --> 00:02:10,831 ♪ shake 'em up and roll 'em down ♪ 22 00:02:10,898 --> 00:02:14,168 ♪ I guess it was fate ♪ 23 00:02:14,235 --> 00:02:16,370 ♪ I hope I wasn't too late ♪ 24 00:02:18,606 --> 00:02:22,776 ♪ bad, bad boys was on our trail ♪ 25 00:02:22,843 --> 00:02:26,680 ♪ Federales want us all in jail ♪ 26 00:02:26,747 --> 00:02:31,619 ♪ but these words keeps ringin' in my ears ♪ 27 00:02:33,754 --> 00:02:37,425 ♪ little bit is better than nada ♪ 28 00:02:37,491 --> 00:02:41,295 ♪ sometime you want the whole enchilada ♪ 29 00:02:41,362 --> 00:02:45,098 ♪ little bit is better than nada ♪ 30 00:02:45,165 --> 00:02:48,702 ♪ a little bit or nothin' at all ♪ 31 00:02:57,700 --> 00:02:58,700 Oh, man. 32 00:02:58,700 --> 00:03:00,500 Hey, you derelicts, you know what time it is? 33 00:03:00,600 --> 00:03:01,300 Yeah. What's up? 34 00:03:01,500 --> 00:03:04,400 It is bug betting time, all right? 35 00:03:04,700 --> 00:03:06,400 First bug to get fried wins $2.00. 36 00:03:06,600 --> 00:03:07,900 I got this green one right there. 37 00:03:13,800 --> 00:03:15,700 All right, Earl, you gotta actually let go of the money 38 00:03:15,700 --> 00:03:16,800 in order for it to be a bet. 39 00:03:16,800 --> 00:03:17,500 All right, come to daddy. 40 00:03:17,700 --> 00:03:19,200 All right. Round and round she goes. 41 00:03:19,400 --> 00:03:20,400 Where she stops, nobody... 42 00:03:20,500 --> 00:03:21,600 Number 2! 43 00:03:21,700 --> 00:03:24,300 Aah! Winner, winner, chicken dinner! 44 00:03:24,400 --> 00:03:26,100 ♪ a little bit is better than nada ♪ 45 00:03:27,000 --> 00:03:29,900 ♪ sometime you want the whole enchilada ♪ 46 00:03:31,900 --> 00:03:33,700 any of you shitheels ever get bored? 47 00:03:34,100 --> 00:03:35,100 Huh? 48 00:03:35,400 --> 00:03:36,500 You ever get bored? 49 00:03:38,600 --> 00:03:39,600 I got a riddle. 50 00:03:40,200 --> 00:03:41,200 You got a riddle? 51 00:03:42,000 --> 00:03:44,400 Takes about two ounces of brains to figure it out. 52 00:03:45,500 --> 00:03:46,600 Anybody think they got a brain 53 00:03:46,700 --> 00:03:48,100 with two ounces of brains in it? 54 00:03:48,700 --> 00:03:50,400 There's a rumor Earl does. 55 00:03:51,900 --> 00:03:53,300 Well, for Christ's sakes, boys, come on, 56 00:03:53,300 --> 00:03:55,800 a little self-confidence from the players' gallery, all right? 57 00:03:56,100 --> 00:03:57,400 We ain't talking long division. 58 00:03:57,700 --> 00:03:59,000 How much we got to lose? 59 00:03:59,000 --> 00:04:00,500 You want to liven things up, Earl? 60 00:04:00,500 --> 00:04:01,700 That's a hell of an idea. 61 00:04:02,700 --> 00:04:04,700 So everyone puts in 20 bucks. 62 00:04:04,800 --> 00:04:06,600 Pot goes to whoever solves the riddle. 63 00:04:06,800 --> 00:04:08,200 You're gonna get the riddle, tin cup. 64 00:04:10,400 --> 00:04:12,600 Dewey, I'm the one asking the riddle. 65 00:04:12,900 --> 00:04:14,200 I already know the answer, okay? 66 00:04:14,200 --> 00:04:15,800 I don't... I don't get a guess. 67 00:04:16,000 --> 00:04:16,600 All right. 68 00:04:16,800 --> 00:04:19,000 Although we could say if I get to 500 bounces 69 00:04:19,100 --> 00:04:20,300 on the old wedge here 70 00:04:20,600 --> 00:04:21,800 and no one gets the riddle, 71 00:04:22,000 --> 00:04:23,000 I get the pot. 72 00:04:23,900 --> 00:04:25,000 Now, I know what you're thinking. 73 00:04:25,000 --> 00:04:26,600 You're thinking it's an impossible riddle. 74 00:04:26,700 --> 00:04:28,300 Well, it's not. It's a easy riddle. 75 00:04:28,600 --> 00:04:30,700 And if somehow, by the grace of fluke luck, 76 00:04:31,400 --> 00:04:34,000 I win, and y'all don't agree that it was a easy riddle, 77 00:04:34,400 --> 00:04:35,400 well, then, hell, uh, 78 00:04:36,100 --> 00:04:37,100 I'll refund your money. 79 00:04:41,100 --> 00:04:41,700 I'm in! 80 00:04:41,900 --> 00:04:43,400 - All right! All right! - Money in the bank. 81 00:04:43,400 --> 00:04:45,200 I'll hold the money. Come on. Give it up. 82 00:04:45,400 --> 00:04:48,000 Now, a man's driving down the road with his son, 83 00:04:48,500 --> 00:04:49,700 and he gets in a crash. 84 00:04:50,100 --> 00:04:51,200 Two ambulances come 85 00:04:51,400 --> 00:04:54,500 and take the man and his son to different hospitals. 86 00:04:54,600 --> 00:04:56,000 Okay? Different hospitals. 87 00:04:57,100 --> 00:04:59,500 Son goes into the operating room, all right? 88 00:05:00,400 --> 00:05:02,000 The doctor looks at him, says, 89 00:05:03,200 --> 00:05:04,800 "I can't operate on this boy." 90 00:05:05,700 --> 00:05:06,700 He's my son.” 91 00:05:06,900 --> 00:05:09,500 Now, how is that possible, hmm? 92 00:05:10,100 --> 00:05:11,400 How is that possible? 93 00:05:23,200 --> 00:05:24,200 Clock's ticking, fellas. 94 00:05:24,700 --> 00:05:26,000 The father's still over at the other hospital. 95 00:05:26,000 --> 00:05:27,400 I mean, he didn't sneak back in, right? 96 00:05:27,500 --> 00:05:28,200 This ain't Star Trek, Earl. 97 00:05:28,400 --> 00:05:29,600 Nobody beamed him aboard. 98 00:05:29,800 --> 00:05:33,500 All right. What about if, uh, if the father married the son's daughter? 99 00:05:33,700 --> 00:05:34,800 This is a family riddle, Earl. 100 00:05:34,800 --> 00:05:36,900 You got... you gotta think clean thoughts. 101 00:05:37,100 --> 00:05:38,300 Hey, give us a little hint. 102 00:05:38,500 --> 00:05:39,300 You want a hint, Clint? 103 00:05:39,400 --> 00:05:40,000 Little hint. 104 00:05:40,200 --> 00:05:40,900 All right. 105 00:05:41,100 --> 00:05:42,400 The doctor's a woman. 106 00:05:45,200 --> 00:05:46,500 The doctor's a woman. 107 00:05:48,600 --> 00:05:50,600 See, the doctor's the son's mother. 108 00:05:51,500 --> 00:05:52,600 Feminists posed the riddle 109 00:05:52,600 --> 00:05:55,400 to reveal how deeply our sexual stereotypes run. 110 00:05:55,700 --> 00:05:57,300 L, uh, take it you're a feminist. 111 00:06:00,000 --> 00:06:01,600 Ma'am, I've been called a lot of things before, 112 00:06:01,600 --> 00:06:03,300 - never been saddled with that one. - Ah. 113 00:06:05,800 --> 00:06:07,600 Smell of leather, sting of a whip. 114 00:06:07,800 --> 00:06:08,800 - Ooh! - Mercy. 115 00:06:08,900 --> 00:06:10,100 Well, I'm just a humble golf pro. 116 00:06:10,200 --> 00:06:11,300 Could I help you? 117 00:06:11,700 --> 00:06:13,000 You're Roy McAvoy, the golf pro? 118 00:06:13,400 --> 00:06:14,000 Mm-hmm. 119 00:06:14,300 --> 00:06:17,200 Oh, well, I-I pictured something, uh, different. 120 00:06:18,200 --> 00:06:19,600 I have a 7:00 lesson. 121 00:06:20,000 --> 00:06:21,300 I thought I had a Dr. Griswold. 122 00:06:23,600 --> 00:06:24,600 Uh-huh... 123 00:06:24,700 --> 00:06:25,700 That's me. 124 00:06:26,900 --> 00:06:27,900 Okay. 125 00:06:36,500 --> 00:06:38,200 First thing you gotta learn about this game, doc, 126 00:06:38,200 --> 00:06:40,200 is it ain't about hitting some little white ball 127 00:06:40,400 --> 00:06:41,400 in some yonder hole. 128 00:06:41,600 --> 00:06:42,700 It's about inner demons: 129 00:06:43,200 --> 00:06:44,500 Self-doubt, human frailty, 130 00:06:44,700 --> 00:06:46,500 and overcoming all that crap. 131 00:06:46,700 --> 00:06:47,700 Oh, yeah. 132 00:06:47,700 --> 00:06:49,700 So what kind of doctor did you say you were? 133 00:06:50,100 --> 00:06:51,100 I'm a psychologist. 134 00:06:51,800 --> 00:06:53,100 In layman's terms call me 135 00:06:53,300 --> 00:06:55,800 Neo-Jungian, postmodern, Freudian, holistic, secularist. 136 00:06:58,000 --> 00:06:59,000 Okay. 137 00:06:59,300 --> 00:07:00,800 I mean, inner demons and human frailty, 138 00:07:01,000 --> 00:07:02,100 well, that's my life's work. 139 00:07:02,300 --> 00:07:03,500 I used to practice in El Paso, 140 00:07:03,600 --> 00:07:04,900 but I moved here now. 141 00:07:05,600 --> 00:07:07,000 What is all this stuff? 142 00:07:07,100 --> 00:07:09,100 Oh, I ordered all this from the golf channel. 143 00:07:09,400 --> 00:07:12,100 It's a... it's a waste of money. 144 00:07:12,500 --> 00:07:14,600 Well, no, I'm... look, I'm sure 145 00:07:14,700 --> 00:07:16,700 that there are some excesses and repetitions here, 146 00:07:16,900 --> 00:07:18,500 but I believe in the gathering of knowledge, 147 00:07:18,500 --> 00:07:20,500 and I thought, you know, there must be some truth 148 00:07:20,700 --> 00:07:22,900 to the golf swing illustrated by some of these devices, 149 00:07:23,000 --> 00:07:24,500 and that you would just kind of help me, you know, 150 00:07:24,500 --> 00:07:25,700 sort through it all. 151 00:07:25,900 --> 00:07:28,100 I have dozens of golf videotapes, too. 152 00:07:28,300 --> 00:07:29,600 I'll bet she's got a golf watch. 153 00:07:30,200 --> 00:07:31,200 You got a golf watch? 154 00:07:31,900 --> 00:07:33,500 Yeah. I-I think I got a pretty good one. 155 00:07:34,000 --> 00:07:34,800 Right there. 156 00:07:35,000 --> 00:07:36,700 Well, take it off. 157 00:07:37,300 --> 00:07:38,500 - Take it off? - All of it, right now. 158 00:07:38,600 --> 00:07:40,300 Just... all of it now. 159 00:07:40,500 --> 00:07:42,400 You're a smart woman, for Christ's sakes, right? 160 00:07:43,000 --> 00:07:44,000 Jeez. 161 00:07:44,600 --> 00:07:46,900 Don't you know the work of hustlers when you see it? 162 00:07:47,400 --> 00:07:48,400 Well, no. 163 00:07:49,900 --> 00:07:51,600 I mean, 164 00:07:51,900 --> 00:07:54,400 I can always tell when someone's lying to himself, okay? 165 00:07:54,700 --> 00:07:56,600 But I'm quite susceptible and frequently wrong 166 00:07:56,700 --> 00:07:57,900 when that person lies to me. 167 00:07:58,100 --> 00:08:00,500 I mean, Christ, this stuff cost me over $200. 168 00:08:00,700 --> 00:08:03,500 Well, it's uh, $200 of shit. 169 00:08:04,300 --> 00:08:06,100 Well, that's just great. 170 00:08:06,500 --> 00:08:07,700 Why don't we do this the old-fashioned way? 171 00:08:07,700 --> 00:08:09,000 Just go take a swing. 172 00:08:10,200 --> 00:08:11,200 All right. 173 00:08:16,500 --> 00:08:17,500 Okay. 174 00:08:20,000 --> 00:08:21,000 Come on. 175 00:08:23,900 --> 00:08:24,900 Excuse me. 176 00:08:27,100 --> 00:08:28,300 = oh! 177 00:08:29,900 --> 00:08:30,900 Fuck. 178 00:08:33,500 --> 00:08:34,900 Well, you talk like a golfer. 179 00:08:35,400 --> 00:08:37,400 That's a pretty girl to have such an ugly swing. 180 00:08:39,100 --> 00:08:40,600 = oh! God! 181 00:08:40,900 --> 00:08:41,900 Oh, that hurt. 182 00:08:42,600 --> 00:08:43,600 Shit! 183 00:08:45,500 --> 00:08:46,800 Fuck. Shit. 184 00:08:47,200 --> 00:08:48,700 Those are highly technical golf terms. 185 00:08:48,800 --> 00:08:50,600 You're using them on your very first lesson. 186 00:08:51,200 --> 00:08:52,800 This is promising. 187 00:08:53,300 --> 00:08:54,300 Right. 188 00:08:54,500 --> 00:08:55,800 Okay, wise-ass. 189 00:08:56,300 --> 00:08:57,300 Show me. Just go ahead. 190 00:09:11,600 --> 00:09:12,600 Something like that. 191 00:09:14,000 --> 00:09:15,000 That's impressive. 192 00:09:15,600 --> 00:09:18,000 You know, look, I tend to process things verbally, 193 00:09:18,200 --> 00:09:19,700 so do you think you could break down into words 194 00:09:19,700 --> 00:09:20,700 how you just did that? 195 00:09:24,800 --> 00:09:28,800 You mean, what is the... What is the golf swing, by Roy McAvoy? 196 00:09:31,300 --> 00:09:33,600 Well, I tend to think of the golf swing as a poem. 197 00:09:33,800 --> 00:09:35,800 Oh, he's doing that poetry thing again. 198 00:09:36,200 --> 00:09:38,700 Critical opening phrase of this poem will always be the grip, 199 00:09:39,600 --> 00:09:41,300 which the hands unite to form a single unit 200 00:09:41,500 --> 00:09:43,000 by the simple overlap of the... 201 00:09:44,700 --> 00:09:45,800 Little finger. 202 00:09:46,000 --> 00:09:47,000 Right. 203 00:09:47,300 --> 00:09:48,700 Lowly and slowly... 204 00:09:49,200 --> 00:09:51,100 The club head is led back, pulled into position, 205 00:09:51,300 --> 00:09:53,800 not by the hands, but by the body, 206 00:09:54,000 --> 00:09:55,300 which turns away from the target, 207 00:09:55,300 --> 00:09:56,500 shifting weight to the right side 208 00:09:56,600 --> 00:09:58,200 without shifting balance. 209 00:09:58,400 --> 00:10:00,300 Tempo is everything, perfection unattainable. 210 00:10:00,400 --> 00:10:02,300 As the body coils now to the top of the swing, 211 00:10:02,400 --> 00:10:04,100 there's a slight hesitation, 212 00:10:04,400 --> 00:10:05,800 a little nod to the gods, 213 00:10:06,800 --> 00:10:08,100 uh, a nod to the gods? 214 00:10:08,300 --> 00:10:09,300 Yeah. 215 00:10:09,400 --> 00:10:10,400 To the gods. 216 00:10:10,900 --> 00:10:12,000 That he is fallible. 217 00:10:12,700 --> 00:10:14,000 That perfection is unattainable, 218 00:10:14,200 --> 00:10:16,400 and now the weight begins shifting back to the left, 219 00:10:16,500 --> 00:10:18,500 pulled by the powers inside the earth. 220 00:10:18,700 --> 00:10:20,800 It's alive, this swing, a living sculpture, 221 00:10:21,000 --> 00:10:23,400 and down through contact, always down, 222 00:10:23,700 --> 00:10:25,200 striking the ball crisply... 223 00:10:26,100 --> 00:10:27,200 With character. 224 00:10:27,400 --> 00:10:29,300 A tuning fork goes off in your heart, 225 00:10:29,700 --> 00:10:30,700 your balls. 226 00:10:32,300 --> 00:10:34,700 Such a pure feeling is the well-struck golf shot. 227 00:10:36,300 --> 00:10:37,800 And then the follow-through to finish, 228 00:10:38,300 --> 00:10:39,400 always on line. 229 00:10:40,000 --> 00:10:42,100 The reverse "c" of the golden bear. 230 00:10:43,400 --> 00:10:46,100 The steelworker's power and brawn of Carl sandburg's... 231 00:10:46,300 --> 00:10:47,900 = Arnold Palmer! 232 00:10:49,200 --> 00:10:51,100 Oh, he's doing that Arnold Palmer thing. 233 00:10:52,000 --> 00:10:55,300 And the unfinished symphony of Roy McAvoy. 234 00:10:56,700 --> 00:10:57,700 Um... 235 00:10:57,900 --> 00:10:59,400 What? What's unfinished? 236 00:11:00,700 --> 00:11:02,400 Well, I have a short follow-through, it... 237 00:11:03,100 --> 00:11:04,500 Has a unfinished look. 238 00:11:05,300 --> 00:11:06,300 Why? 239 00:11:07,800 --> 00:11:09,800 Well, some say it's because that's the easiest way 240 00:11:09,900 --> 00:11:11,800 to play through the winds of west Texas, and... 241 00:11:12,100 --> 00:11:15,600 Some say it's because I've never finished anything in my life. 242 00:11:16,900 --> 00:11:18,800 You can decide, but the point is 243 00:11:19,600 --> 00:11:21,500 every finishing position is unique. 244 00:11:22,100 --> 00:11:23,100 Huh. 245 00:11:24,300 --> 00:11:27,200 That's what the golf swing's all about. 246 00:11:27,600 --> 00:11:29,700 It's about gaining control of your life 247 00:11:29,900 --> 00:11:32,400 and letting go at the same time. 248 00:11:35,400 --> 00:11:36,700 Jeez, Louise. 249 00:11:36,800 --> 00:11:38,400 There's only one other acceptable theory 250 00:11:38,500 --> 00:11:39,700 about how to hit a golf ball. 251 00:11:39,800 --> 00:11:41,900 Oh, boy. Well, I'm afraid to ask. 252 00:11:42,700 --> 00:11:44,300 Well, what is it? What's the other theory? 253 00:11:45,000 --> 00:11:46,200 Grip it and rip it. 254 00:11:49,500 --> 00:11:51,400 Well, you know, um... 255 00:11:52,300 --> 00:11:55,800 While I do appreciate your poetic sensibility, Mr. McAvoy. 256 00:11:55,900 --> 00:11:56,900 Call me Roy, Molly. 257 00:11:57,100 --> 00:11:59,600 Well, call me Dr. Griswold, Roy, but at this point, 258 00:11:59,700 --> 00:12:02,000 I really think I'm more of the grip-it-and-rip-it school. 259 00:12:02,900 --> 00:12:04,600 Well, then, let's tee it up. 260 00:12:05,300 --> 00:12:06,300 All right, waggle. 261 00:12:08,000 --> 00:12:09,000 Waggle. 262 00:12:10,700 --> 00:12:11,700 No, no. 263 00:12:11,700 --> 00:12:13,000 He's got her waggling now. 264 00:12:13,400 --> 00:12:15,700 - Oh, lord. - Waggle the clubhead. 265 00:12:16,100 --> 00:12:17,100 Okay? = ah. 266 00:12:17,700 --> 00:12:19,700 It's a little relaxing ritual we do, 267 00:12:19,900 --> 00:12:20,900 - mm-hmm. - Okay? 268 00:12:21,000 --> 00:12:22,200 - Okay. - Just waggle it. 269 00:12:25,200 --> 00:12:27,200 Waggle it and let the big dog eat. 270 00:12:29,700 --> 00:12:30,700 What big dog? 271 00:12:31,000 --> 00:12:32,300 The driver, the number one wood. 272 00:12:32,400 --> 00:12:33,100 Well, this is metal. 273 00:12:33,300 --> 00:12:34,800 Yeah. Well, woods are metal. Don't worry about it. 274 00:12:34,800 --> 00:12:36,600 And the... the driver's known as the big dog. 275 00:12:36,800 --> 00:12:39,400 I'm just saying, "let him loose. Let 'er rip." 276 00:12:40,000 --> 00:12:41,000 Let the big dog eat.” 277 00:12:41,100 --> 00:12:42,100 Okay. 278 00:12:42,400 --> 00:12:43,400 Okay. 279 00:12:51,700 --> 00:12:52,700 Oh! 280 00:12:52,800 --> 00:12:53,800 Oh. 281 00:12:54,700 --> 00:12:57,200 You know, this is without a doubt the stupidest, silliest, 282 00:12:57,300 --> 00:12:59,400 most idiotic grotesquery masquerading as a game 283 00:12:59,600 --> 00:13:00,800 that has ever been invented... 284 00:13:00,900 --> 00:13:01,500 - Ever. - Yes, ma'am, 285 00:13:01,700 --> 00:13:02,900 and that's why I love it. 286 00:13:03,200 --> 00:13:04,500 Now, you hit one good shot, okay? 287 00:13:04,600 --> 00:13:08,000 One, and that tuning fork rings in your loins... 288 00:13:10,500 --> 00:13:12,500 You can't wait to get back. 289 00:13:13,000 --> 00:13:14,200 Try it again. 290 00:13:25,400 --> 00:13:26,400 =- mim-hmm. 291 00:13:26,600 --> 00:13:28,600 Well, I think the big dog just ate something there. 292 00:13:28,800 --> 00:13:29,800 Mm-hmm. 293 00:13:30,600 --> 00:13:32,800 Did that tuning fork ring in your loins? 294 00:13:33,800 --> 00:13:35,700 Well, I wouldn't go that far. 295 00:13:37,900 --> 00:13:39,400 Well, I always say quit on a good shot. 296 00:13:40,300 --> 00:13:41,700 We'll call that lesson number one? 297 00:13:42,200 --> 00:13:43,800 Well, oh, okay. 298 00:13:44,700 --> 00:13:45,800 And, um... 299 00:13:46,900 --> 00:13:49,700 If you wouldn't mind paying me in cash? 300 00:13:50,900 --> 00:13:53,900 There's a little situation I'm dealing with with the IRS, okay? 301 00:13:54,100 --> 00:13:54,600 Mm-hmm. 302 00:13:54,800 --> 00:13:57,700 With those guys, I gotta Bob and weave around the facts of life, 303 00:13:57,800 --> 00:13:58,800 if you know what I mean. 304 00:13:58,900 --> 00:14:01,200 Yeah. Look, can I ask you a question? 305 00:14:02,700 --> 00:14:04,800 If you're such a legendary striker of the golf ball, 306 00:14:05,000 --> 00:14:07,700 as everyone says, then why are you, at your age, 307 00:14:07,900 --> 00:14:09,100 out here in the middle of nowhere 308 00:14:09,200 --> 00:14:12,300 operating a barely solvent establishment, ducking the IRS, 309 00:14:12,400 --> 00:14:13,700 collecting a few pathetic dollars 310 00:14:13,800 --> 00:14:14,800 to buy your next six-pack 311 00:14:14,900 --> 00:14:16,500 when you're capable of so much more? 312 00:14:16,800 --> 00:14:19,400 Jj 313 00:14:21,200 --> 00:14:23,100 Perhaps I'm chock full of inner demons. 314 00:14:25,400 --> 00:14:26,400 - No. - Hmm? 315 00:14:26,600 --> 00:14:28,200 You're chock full of bullshit. 316 00:14:29,500 --> 00:14:30,500 Anyway... 317 00:14:30,800 --> 00:14:31,800 Same time next week? 318 00:14:32,700 --> 00:14:35,300 Jj 319 00:14:37,900 --> 00:14:40,600 W-What do you mean I should try being saddled sometime? 320 00:14:43,000 --> 00:14:45,900 Were you being literal, or was that some Freudian type of deal? 321 00:14:46,900 --> 00:14:47,900 Molly? 322 00:14:48,200 --> 00:14:48,900 Doctor? 323 00:14:49,200 --> 00:14:50,500 What kind of saddle? 324 00:14:51,200 --> 00:14:55,200 Jj 325 00:15:16,900 --> 00:15:18,300 David Simms. 326 00:15:18,800 --> 00:15:20,300 What the hell you doing here, man? 327 00:15:20,600 --> 00:15:21,900 Hey there, Romeo. 328 00:15:22,800 --> 00:15:24,600 Been a while, hasn't it? = yeah. 329 00:15:25,400 --> 00:15:26,400 Tin cup around? 330 00:15:26,900 --> 00:15:27,900 Uh, no. 331 00:15:28,100 --> 00:15:30,700 He's in, um, Houston on, uh, business, so. 332 00:15:32,100 --> 00:15:34,700 Anyway, I thought you were supposed to be on the big pro golf tour. 333 00:15:37,700 --> 00:15:39,900 Well, you tell tin cup that I'm in town 334 00:15:40,000 --> 00:15:42,400 for my big charity best ball tournament. 335 00:15:43,400 --> 00:15:44,600 And I got a spot for him 336 00:15:45,300 --> 00:15:46,900 if he ever gets back from, uh... 337 00:15:48,200 --> 00:15:49,400 Huh? Uh, Houston. 338 00:15:50,000 --> 00:15:51,000 Yeah. Wherever. 339 00:15:51,000 --> 00:15:53,200 Well, uh, I thought you hated him, man. 340 00:15:53,400 --> 00:15:56,200 Hell, I haven't even thought about him in a dozen years. 341 00:15:58,700 --> 00:16:01,400 Not since the good old days at the university of Houston 342 00:16:02,300 --> 00:16:04,300 when we won all them titles together. 343 00:16:05,700 --> 00:16:07,400 God almighty. = 344 00:16:07,600 --> 00:16:10,300 well, he says he carried you on his back all them years, man. 345 00:16:10,700 --> 00:16:13,100 Well, I didn't have much craft back then, Romeo, 346 00:16:13,300 --> 00:16:15,600 just a little native ability. 347 00:16:17,300 --> 00:16:20,600 Now, old Roy, he's a helluva ball striker, isn't he? 348 00:16:21,400 --> 00:16:22,400 What do you want, man? 349 00:16:24,600 --> 00:16:26,300 I want to win my own tournament, Romeo. 350 00:16:26,600 --> 00:16:27,600 Bet you do. 351 00:16:27,800 --> 00:16:28,900 Now, old Roy, he can help me 352 00:16:29,000 --> 00:16:31,400 if we can manage to behave like grownups together. 353 00:16:32,100 --> 00:16:34,200 Yep. You never know, huh? 354 00:16:37,500 --> 00:16:38,500 You tell him that. 355 00:16:38,600 --> 00:16:40,900 - Yeah. I'll be sure to tell him. - So what's the... 356 00:16:41,800 --> 00:16:44,200 What's the catch, David? 357 00:16:46,600 --> 00:16:47,600 Hello, cup. 358 00:16:49,200 --> 00:16:50,400 There is no catch. 359 00:16:51,400 --> 00:16:53,300 I put together this little tournament, with a... 360 00:16:54,000 --> 00:16:55,600 An elite field of players, 361 00:16:55,900 --> 00:16:57,300 and a half-million dollar purse, 362 00:16:58,400 --> 00:17:00,900 and, by god, I'm tired of seeing the money head out of town. 363 00:17:01,400 --> 00:17:02,500 Make more birdies. 364 00:17:07,000 --> 00:17:08,600 Yeah. Well... 365 00:17:08,800 --> 00:17:10,200 That's where you come in, partner. 366 00:17:10,800 --> 00:17:11,900 I need you on my team. 367 00:17:12,900 --> 00:17:15,200 Well, I repeat. Uh, what's the catch? 368 00:17:15,600 --> 00:17:18,500 We're playing cottonwood, where you once shot a 59. 369 00:17:18,800 --> 00:17:21,500 Where you can still shoot a 65 in your sleep. 370 00:17:22,200 --> 00:17:24,000 Because you know every bump on every fairway 371 00:17:24,100 --> 00:17:26,500 and every subtle break on every green. 372 00:17:27,600 --> 00:17:28,600 Hot tub, Roy? 373 00:17:31,200 --> 00:17:32,200 It's a spa. 374 00:17:34,900 --> 00:17:36,600 You and me at cottonwood. 375 00:17:37,500 --> 00:17:39,000 Kind of like the old days, isn't it? 376 00:17:44,300 --> 00:17:46,100 Yeah, well, put 'er there, partner! 377 00:17:47,200 --> 00:17:48,900 These two homeboys are gonna show the world 378 00:17:49,000 --> 00:17:50,600 what golf in west Texas is all about. 379 00:17:51,700 --> 00:17:54,200 Hell, I'll be a goddamn birdie-making machine for you out there. 380 00:17:54,400 --> 00:17:57,000 Oh, whoa. Whoa, wait a minute there, Roy. 381 00:17:57,400 --> 00:17:59,300 Hell, I didn't mean I wanted you to play with me. 382 00:18:00,000 --> 00:18:01,400 I want you to caddy for me. 383 00:18:01,500 --> 00:18:04,100 You know, read the Greens, club me, that kind of stuff. 384 00:18:05,500 --> 00:18:08,500 Que te lleva la chingada, cabrón, que caddy con nadie. 385 00:18:12,700 --> 00:18:13,700 Caddy? 386 00:18:14,500 --> 00:18:15,600 Come on, Roy. 387 00:18:16,000 --> 00:18:17,700 Hell, I can't bring a guy in off the street 388 00:18:17,900 --> 00:18:19,100 to play in my tournament. 389 00:18:20,400 --> 00:18:23,100 I mean, for Christ's sake, guys, 390 00:18:23,400 --> 00:18:25,100 this has become a big-time event. 391 00:18:25,900 --> 00:18:28,800 Hell, I got corporate sponsors, 30 bucks a ticket. 392 00:18:29,200 --> 00:18:30,500 This guy off the street 393 00:18:30,700 --> 00:18:33,200 can kick your ass on the golf course anytime, man. 394 00:18:33,400 --> 00:18:34,900 Just like he kicked your ass in junior golf, 395 00:18:35,000 --> 00:18:37,400 just like he kicked your ass in university... no. Fuck it, man. 396 00:18:40,300 --> 00:18:42,100 I'll give you 100 bucks for the loop. 397 00:18:42,500 --> 00:18:44,700 And five percent of any earnings, Roy. 398 00:18:45,600 --> 00:18:47,100 Get the hell out of here, man, 399 00:18:47,500 --> 00:18:49,400 and take your pinche color-coordinated, 400 00:18:49,600 --> 00:18:50,900 corporate-sponsored chingada and 401 00:18:51,100 --> 00:18:52,400 take a flying fuck on the rolling... = Romeo. 402 00:18:52,400 --> 00:18:53,800 I got it man. Don't worry about it. 403 00:18:55,600 --> 00:18:56,600 Well, 404 00:18:57,800 --> 00:18:59,200 I was just trying to offer you some work. 405 00:18:59,200 --> 00:19:00,600 Yeah. Thank you very much. 406 00:19:02,100 --> 00:19:03,100 David? 407 00:19:03,900 --> 00:19:04,900 Yeah? 408 00:19:06,100 --> 00:19:07,200 I'll take the job. 409 00:19:08,600 --> 00:19:10,300 Yeah. We'll take the job. 410 00:19:17,957 --> 00:19:19,759 ♪ flat broke ♪ 411 00:19:19,826 --> 00:19:21,661 ♪ and busted ♪ 412 00:19:22,995 --> 00:19:24,897 ♪ just don't seem fair ♪ 413 00:19:26,032 --> 00:19:29,302 ♪ the man in heaven ♪ 414 00:19:29,369 --> 00:19:32,372 ♪ don't hear my prayer ♪ 415 00:19:32,439 --> 00:19:35,942 ♪ and these dice are loaded ♪ 416 00:19:36,008 --> 00:19:39,479 ♪ but I still can't win ♪ 417 00:19:39,546 --> 00:19:41,514 ♪ flat broke and busted ♪ 418 00:19:41,600 --> 00:19:42,800 this looks like it might be a little more 419 00:19:42,900 --> 00:19:44,100 than you got in the bag, partner. 420 00:19:44,300 --> 00:19:45,300 I could make that. 421 00:19:45,600 --> 00:19:49,000 ♪ all crapped out a... ♪ 422 00:19:49,200 --> 00:19:50,200 shit. 423 00:19:51,000 --> 00:19:53,100 J; Gain ♪ 424 00:19:53,500 --> 00:19:54,500 is he on? 425 00:19:55,200 --> 00:19:56,200 He's on. 426 00:19:56,500 --> 00:19:58,000 Pretty good shape, too. 427 00:19:59,200 --> 00:20:00,000 I mean, my guy could do it. 428 00:20:00,200 --> 00:20:01,700 I've seen him do it lots of times, 429 00:20:03,000 --> 00:20:05,400 and you have extra-large huevos. 430 00:20:15,500 --> 00:20:16,100 Hit it! 431 00:20:16,300 --> 00:20:17,300 Oh! 432 00:20:18,700 --> 00:20:20,600 Oh! Oh! 433 00:20:20,800 --> 00:20:22,000 Shit! 434 00:20:22,400 --> 00:20:23,400 Fuck that! 435 00:20:23,800 --> 00:20:25,700 I told you that was more than you had in your bag. 436 00:20:25,700 --> 00:20:27,200 Shit, I had to, partner. 437 00:20:27,400 --> 00:20:28,900 I mean, your damn caddy came by and told me 438 00:20:28,900 --> 00:20:30,300 that he'd get on the green from here. 439 00:20:32,200 --> 00:20:33,200 I could. 440 00:20:38,700 --> 00:20:40,300 I got to hand it to you, Roy. 441 00:20:41,200 --> 00:20:44,500 For 15 holes, you seemed to grasp the concept here. 442 00:20:45,200 --> 00:20:46,800 See, I'm trying to win this tournament, 443 00:20:47,100 --> 00:20:48,800 and your job is to help me. 444 00:20:52,300 --> 00:20:53,000 Give me the 7-iron. 445 00:20:53,300 --> 00:20:54,300 I'm gonna lay up. 446 00:20:57,100 --> 00:20:59,100 David, you can make that shot. 447 00:20:59,300 --> 00:21:01,400 Hell, I can make that shot, easy. 448 00:21:03,300 --> 00:21:05,300 I know I can make this goddamn shot, 449 00:21:05,500 --> 00:21:07,300 but the smart play is to lay up. 450 00:21:09,200 --> 00:21:10,500 These people didn't pay 30 bucks 451 00:21:10,600 --> 00:21:13,100 to see a tour star lay up on a short par five. 452 00:21:13,400 --> 00:21:16,000 I'm sitting on a two-shot lead with three to go. 453 00:21:16,500 --> 00:21:18,500 Thanks to you, my partner's in his pocket. 454 00:21:19,000 --> 00:21:21,000 Suddenly, par's a helluva number to me. 455 00:21:21,200 --> 00:21:23,400 13 years on the tour, you're still a pussy. 456 00:21:23,600 --> 00:21:26,800 God damn it, David. Just hit the fucking three. 457 00:21:27,400 --> 00:21:28,400 Hit it. 458 00:21:28,500 --> 00:21:30,300 13 years on the driving range, 459 00:21:30,600 --> 00:21:33,500 you still think this game is about your testosterone count. 460 00:21:34,800 --> 00:21:35,800 Now, back up. 461 00:21:39,500 --> 00:21:42,700 230 to carry and the tour stars lay it up. 462 00:21:54,200 --> 00:21:55,800 So Simms, from the rough, 463 00:21:56,100 --> 00:21:57,100 that's a smart play. 464 00:22:05,200 --> 00:22:07,200 Hey, David, you in a hurry or what? 465 00:22:07,400 --> 00:22:08,100 Why? 466 00:22:08,300 --> 00:22:09,600 I got a pile of nickels in the car 467 00:22:09,600 --> 00:22:11,200 that your caddy can knock it on from here. 468 00:22:13,200 --> 00:22:14,200 "Come on, guys, we're..." 469 00:22:14,600 --> 00:22:15,900 Trying to win a tournament here. 470 00:22:16,300 --> 00:22:18,300 Yeah. We are. That's great, but I got five to one. 471 00:22:18,300 --> 00:22:19,100 I think it's pretty good odds. 472 00:22:19,300 --> 00:22:20,300 I think he can do it. 473 00:22:20,600 --> 00:22:22,700 Come on. Let him hit it. It's only an exhibition. 474 00:22:22,700 --> 00:22:24,800 C'mon. Come on, Roy. You can handle it. 475 00:22:25,000 --> 00:22:26,000 I got a ball. 476 00:22:26,400 --> 00:22:27,400 Right here. 477 00:22:28,900 --> 00:22:30,800 Balls versus brains, Roy. 478 00:22:31,900 --> 00:22:33,500 You hit that shot, just keep walking 479 00:22:33,900 --> 00:22:35,200 'cause your ass is fired. 480 00:22:43,900 --> 00:22:46,000 How are you gonna fire me in front of all these people, 481 00:22:47,000 --> 00:22:48,600 especially when I knock it on the green? 482 00:22:49,000 --> 00:22:51,700 It looks like the caddy wants to hit the shot. 483 00:22:52,500 --> 00:22:54,100 Peter Kostis, what's going on down there? 484 00:22:54,400 --> 00:22:57,800 Boys, I think things have officially changed here now. 485 00:22:58,100 --> 00:23:00,800 Forget the two-shot lead. Forget three holes to go. 486 00:23:00,900 --> 00:23:02,700 Hey, Roy, you need a glove. 487 00:23:03,600 --> 00:23:04,200 It'll help. 488 00:23:04,400 --> 00:23:06,600 There's a little side action going on down there. 489 00:23:06,600 --> 00:23:10,900 And, uh, the $250,000 purse has just gotten a little bit bigger. 490 00:23:11,300 --> 00:23:13,700 Gary, Gary, you obviously don't think this guy 491 00:23:13,900 --> 00:23:14,900 can pull this shot off? 492 00:23:15,100 --> 00:23:16,600 I'll tell you what. I don't think there's any chance. 493 00:23:16,700 --> 00:23:18,000 Let me give you a little background here. 494 00:23:18,000 --> 00:23:20,600 This impending disaster's a driving-range pro. 495 00:23:20,900 --> 00:23:22,000 His name is Roy McAvoy. 496 00:23:24,300 --> 00:23:27,100 The locals around here tell me he was a pretty good college player. 497 00:23:27,100 --> 00:23:28,600 He hung around the mini-tours for a while. 498 00:23:28,600 --> 00:23:30,300 Well, he's gonna have to have been a helluva college player 499 00:23:30,300 --> 00:23:31,200 to pull this shot off. 500 00:23:31,300 --> 00:23:32,600 He's got 240 yards. 501 00:23:32,800 --> 00:23:34,300 He's got a national television audience. 502 00:23:34,700 --> 00:23:35,800 He's got a big gallery here, 503 00:23:35,800 --> 00:23:37,200 and he hasn't hit a golf ball yet. 504 00:23:37,200 --> 00:23:39,200 Announcer well, this is something we don't see every day: 505 00:23:39,200 --> 00:23:41,200 National television with no warm-up. 506 00:23:41,300 --> 00:23:42,600 How do you like those odds, Bob? 507 00:23:42,800 --> 00:23:43,800 I don't know who this guy is, 508 00:23:43,800 --> 00:23:46,200 but if this guy even gets it out of there, I'd be surprised. 509 00:23:46,400 --> 00:23:48,000 A tour pro I'd give ten to one. 510 00:23:48,400 --> 00:23:49,700 Dollar bills. 511 00:23:50,200 --> 00:23:51,600 Oh! 512 00:23:51,700 --> 00:23:53,100 Jj 513 00:23:54,000 --> 00:23:55,300 Oh, he's got that good. 514 00:23:56,900 --> 00:23:58,700 Announcer do you believe this? 515 00:24:01,500 --> 00:24:02,800 Unbelievable. 516 00:24:03,000 --> 00:24:04,200 What a caddy. 517 00:24:09,100 --> 00:24:11,500 You. Yeah. You. Come here. Come here. 518 00:24:13,400 --> 00:24:14,700 Can you carry that bag? = yeah. 519 00:24:15,000 --> 00:24:16,100 - Pick it up. - Yes, sir. 520 00:24:20,100 --> 00:24:21,800 Nice shot, Roy. Though shot. = thanks. 521 00:24:21,900 --> 00:24:23,100 Come here. Come here a second. 522 00:24:24,100 --> 00:24:25,900 Take a hike. The loop's over. 523 00:24:28,000 --> 00:24:29,300 You can't fire me. 524 00:24:31,000 --> 00:24:32,400 - Hey, David, come on, man. - How can you fire me? 525 00:24:32,400 --> 00:24:35,700 I... hey, I just knocked it stiff from 250. 526 00:24:35,900 --> 00:24:36,700 - Come on. - Come on, David. 527 00:24:36,900 --> 00:24:38,100 He's always been a jerk. 528 00:24:38,500 --> 00:24:39,700 What about my money? 529 00:24:40,000 --> 00:24:42,300 You just hit the shot that took you out of the money, bud. 530 00:24:42,700 --> 00:24:44,000 Welcome to life on the tour. 531 00:24:44,500 --> 00:24:45,200 Jj 532 00:24:45,400 --> 00:24:46,200 Hey! Hey, whoa! 533 00:24:46,400 --> 00:24:49,100 Announcer tonight, the sports machine brings you a bizarre incident 534 00:24:49,200 --> 00:24:52,500 at the charity golf event of tour star David Simms. 535 00:24:53,000 --> 00:24:54,600 Let's go to west Texas, 536 00:24:54,900 --> 00:24:57,200 well, driving-range pro tin cup McAvoy, 537 00:24:57,400 --> 00:24:59,200 serving as a caddy to David Simms 538 00:24:59,300 --> 00:25:00,400 at the celebrity event... 539 00:25:00,600 --> 00:25:03,200 He grabbed a 3-wood out of his own bag 540 00:25:03,700 --> 00:25:06,300 and drilled a 240-yard shot 541 00:25:06,400 --> 00:25:08,100 over water to the 16th green... 542 00:25:08,300 --> 00:25:09,700 If I had it all to do over, 543 00:25:11,100 --> 00:25:12,300 I'd still hit that shot. 544 00:25:13,200 --> 00:25:14,200 Yeah. I know. 545 00:25:15,600 --> 00:25:16,800 Man, you'd bury yourself alive 546 00:25:16,800 --> 00:25:18,500 just to prove you could handle the shovel. 547 00:25:18,600 --> 00:25:20,700 You know why I'd still hit that shot? 548 00:25:21,400 --> 00:25:22,400 Yeah. 549 00:25:22,900 --> 00:25:24,900 'Cause it's the only way you could beat Dave Simms. 550 00:25:25,200 --> 00:25:26,200 No. 551 00:25:26,900 --> 00:25:28,300 'Cause you get that look in your face. 552 00:25:28,300 --> 00:25:31,300 I'd hit it again because that shot was a defining moment, 553 00:25:31,800 --> 00:25:33,600 and when a defining moment comes along, 554 00:25:33,900 --> 00:25:35,000 you define the moment, 555 00:25:35,800 --> 00:25:37,200 or the moment defines you. 556 00:25:38,300 --> 00:25:40,300 I did not shrink from the challenge. 557 00:25:40,600 --> 00:25:41,100 I Rose to it. 558 00:25:41,300 --> 00:25:44,500 1981, fort Washington golf club, Fresno, California. 559 00:25:44,700 --> 00:25:45,700 Ring a bell? 560 00:25:46,300 --> 00:25:48,300 The final round of the tour qualifying school? 561 00:25:48,300 --> 00:25:50,300 I was playing to win. 562 00:25:51,400 --> 00:25:53,900 Tried to hit that same impossible cut 3-wood into the wind 563 00:25:54,100 --> 00:25:55,100 from a hilly lie. 564 00:25:55,400 --> 00:25:56,400 I was playing to win. 565 00:25:56,600 --> 00:25:58,000 Five in a row out of bounds 566 00:25:58,500 --> 00:25:59,800 till you finally pulled it off 567 00:26:00,400 --> 00:26:02,700 and tapped it in for a crowd-pleasing 13 568 00:26:03,200 --> 00:26:05,400 when a 12 would have got you on the tour. 569 00:26:09,500 --> 00:26:11,400 And the definition was "shit." 570 00:26:12,500 --> 00:26:14,500 Greatness courts failure, Romeo. 571 00:26:15,600 --> 00:26:17,400 You may be right, boss, but you know what? 572 00:26:18,700 --> 00:26:20,800 Sometimes par is good enough to win. 573 00:26:29,000 --> 00:26:30,100 We owe her $12,000. 574 00:26:30,200 --> 00:26:32,900 No. I owe her $12,000, all right? I owe her. 575 00:26:33,100 --> 00:26:35,800 Okay, fine. You owe her $12,000. Like it makes a difference. 576 00:26:36,000 --> 00:26:37,100 It makes a difference. 577 00:26:37,200 --> 00:26:38,800 Look, boss, I only got one rule, 578 00:26:39,100 --> 00:26:41,900 and that's never bet money that you don't have on a dog race 579 00:26:42,100 --> 00:26:44,100 with an ex-girlfriend who happens to be a stripper. 580 00:26:44,400 --> 00:26:47,300 Now you broke that rule, and you're gonna have to be sweet to her, homes. 581 00:26:47,400 --> 00:26:49,100 Look, you gotta tell her something nice to start off with. 582 00:26:49,200 --> 00:26:51,400 You know, kind of like an ice breaker. How hard can it be? 583 00:26:51,600 --> 00:26:52,800 Look, I'll say one thing nice. 584 00:26:52,800 --> 00:26:54,800 If it don't come out right, then you say it better. 585 00:26:55,200 --> 00:26:57,000 Hey, tin cup. Doreen's looking for you. 586 00:26:57,200 --> 00:26:58,200 Yeah, I'll bet she is. 587 00:26:58,685 --> 00:27:04,724 ♪ oh, baby, you look so good to me ♪ 588 00:27:05,100 --> 00:27:06,100 hey, tin cup. 589 00:27:06,300 --> 00:27:07,600 Haven't seen you for three days. 590 00:27:07,800 --> 00:27:08,800 I'm a busy man. 591 00:27:09,800 --> 00:27:10,800 Hey, tin cup. 592 00:27:11,000 --> 00:27:11,800 Hi, sweetie. 593 00:27:12,000 --> 00:27:13,000 Hi, honey. 594 00:27:20,000 --> 00:27:21,400 That better be you, Roy. 595 00:27:21,800 --> 00:27:23,400 Just be nice, okay? 596 00:27:29,100 --> 00:27:30,100 Doreen. 597 00:27:31,300 --> 00:27:34,200 You're looking particularly lovely this evening. 598 00:27:34,700 --> 00:27:37,100 Uh, yeah, that's even nicer than the leopard suit, the... 599 00:27:37,300 --> 00:27:38,600 Cut the horseshit, guys. 600 00:27:39,000 --> 00:27:40,700 You owe me $12,000. 601 00:27:41,000 --> 00:27:42,900 And we're... and we're gonna pay it. Don't worry about that. 602 00:27:43,000 --> 00:27:44,800 Oh, I know you're gonna pay me. 603 00:27:45,200 --> 00:27:47,700 12 smackeroos. Where is it? 604 00:27:50,100 --> 00:27:50,700 There. 605 00:27:50,900 --> 00:27:51,900 What is this? 606 00:27:53,000 --> 00:27:56,700 With equity and inventory, it's worth 12 grand, 607 00:27:57,200 --> 00:27:58,200 more or less. 608 00:27:58,300 --> 00:28:00,900 This is how you think you're gonna settle up? 609 00:28:01,200 --> 00:28:03,300 By giving me the deed to your driving range. 610 00:28:03,500 --> 00:28:05,600 Only on the condition that you don't sell right away, 611 00:28:05,700 --> 00:28:07,600 and me and Romeo keep our jobs. 612 00:28:07,900 --> 00:28:11,800 What in the world would I want with your stupid driving range? 613 00:28:12,200 --> 00:28:15,400 Equity, inventory, cash flow, 614 00:28:15,700 --> 00:28:18,300 not to mention an enhanced stature in the community, 615 00:28:18,500 --> 00:28:22,000 plus a prepaid membership in Salome chamber of commerce. 616 00:28:23,700 --> 00:28:25,100 What are your labor costs? 617 00:28:25,900 --> 00:28:28,000 Everybody gets what they're get... 618 00:28:33,800 --> 00:28:36,300 But the tractor kid gets five bucks an hour. 619 00:28:40,700 --> 00:28:42,800 And Romeo gets 10, cash. 620 00:28:42,900 --> 00:28:44,300 What do you pay yourself? 621 00:28:46,100 --> 00:28:47,100 Myself? 622 00:28:47,300 --> 00:28:49,900 You know, to stand around all day and hit those little golf balls, 623 00:28:50,200 --> 00:28:52,200 when you're not breaking for beers or corn dogs 624 00:28:52,300 --> 00:28:53,800 or to gather the guys up and lay bets 625 00:28:53,800 --> 00:28:55,500 on which crow's gonna fly off the fence next. 626 00:28:56,900 --> 00:28:58,700 Are you referring to my managerial salary? 627 00:28:59,000 --> 00:29:01,400 I am referring to every red nickel that you take from the till 628 00:29:01,500 --> 00:29:03,500 and every bag of beer nuts that you lift from the rack. 629 00:29:03,500 --> 00:29:05,200 That is what I'm referring to. 630 00:29:05,400 --> 00:29:07,400 He'll take the deal. He'll take the deal. 631 00:29:09,500 --> 00:29:10,500 What is the deal? 632 00:29:11,400 --> 00:29:14,900 Okay, let's just say the driving range is worth 10,000. 633 00:29:15,300 --> 00:29:16,700 You still owe me 2. 634 00:29:21,800 --> 00:29:25,900 ♪ maybe tomorrow ♪ 635 00:29:26,700 --> 00:29:28,300 ♪ I'll see some light ♪ 636 00:29:30,500 --> 00:29:32,700 ♪ and I'll know the difference ♪ 637 00:29:33,300 --> 00:29:35,400 ♪ between wrong and right » 638 00:29:37,000 --> 00:29:38,900 ♪ my ship is out there ♪ 639 00:29:40,100 --> 00:29:42,700 ♪ no, but it can't come in ♪ 640 00:29:43,400 --> 00:29:46,500 I flat broke and busted ♪ 641 00:29:46,900 --> 00:29:50,400 ♪ crapped out again ♪ 642 00:29:53,400 --> 00:29:54,500 she's been here a while. 643 00:29:56,700 --> 00:29:57,700 Am I early? 644 00:29:58,100 --> 00:29:59,800 Mr. McAvoy, I can appreciate 645 00:29:59,900 --> 00:30:02,500 that you have a fairly laid-back, relaxed lifestyle, 646 00:30:02,700 --> 00:30:04,100 but I have hours to keep. 647 00:30:04,800 --> 00:30:09,400 All right. A former paramour once ascribed my fluid sense of time 648 00:30:09,600 --> 00:30:11,500 to being born under the sign of Pisces. 649 00:30:12,700 --> 00:30:15,900 Something about... floating through the universe. 650 00:30:16,200 --> 00:30:18,100 Oh. You amuse me, Roy, 651 00:30:18,900 --> 00:30:21,400 but I'm the only woman in America born after world war II 652 00:30:21,500 --> 00:30:23,300 who thinks astrology's a crock of shit. 653 00:30:23,500 --> 00:30:25,000 Now let's see if the big dog'll eat. 654 00:30:25,900 --> 00:30:26,900 Waggle. 655 00:30:28,300 --> 00:30:29,300 I'm waggling. 656 00:30:29,300 --> 00:30:31,100 Set up to the ball like I showed you last time. 657 00:30:31,100 --> 00:30:32,300 I am setting up to the ball. 658 00:30:32,900 --> 00:30:35,300 Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold on, hold on. 659 00:30:35,500 --> 00:30:36,000 Yeah. 660 00:30:36,200 --> 00:30:37,900 Quit trying to wring the club's neck, Molly. 661 00:30:38,300 --> 00:30:38,900 All right? 662 00:30:39,100 --> 00:30:41,600 Show a little warmth, a little compassion. 663 00:30:43,300 --> 00:30:46,000 Remember, this game's about trust and touch... 664 00:30:47,400 --> 00:30:48,400 And lettin' go, 665 00:30:49,100 --> 00:30:51,700 so while I subtly enhance your technical prospects, 666 00:30:53,900 --> 00:30:56,600 why don't you tell me all about your personal life? 667 00:30:57,000 --> 00:30:58,300 That's none of your business, Roy. 668 00:31:00,400 --> 00:31:03,100 Your boyfriend's a golfer. That's my bet. 669 00:31:03,200 --> 00:31:05,600 And he's the reason you're taking this game up. Hmm? 670 00:31:06,300 --> 00:31:07,800 Hell, I probably even know him. 671 00:31:08,000 --> 00:31:10,000 Get your hands off her ass, Roy. 672 00:31:12,800 --> 00:31:13,800 Hi, honey. 673 00:31:14,700 --> 00:31:15,700 Hi, darlin'. 674 00:31:16,000 --> 00:31:17,500 He's taking her to Miami 675 00:31:17,500 --> 00:31:19,000 for the fucking doral. 676 00:31:19,900 --> 00:31:21,500 How am I supposed to compete with that? 677 00:31:21,700 --> 00:31:23,800 Man, you are having a bad week, aren't you? 678 00:31:24,000 --> 00:31:26,900 Man, she must think I'm such a nothing, such a loser. 679 00:31:27,100 --> 00:31:30,200 A lousy driving-range pro living in a winnebago. 680 00:31:30,900 --> 00:31:32,700 She don't know you live in a winnebago. 681 00:31:33,100 --> 00:31:35,600 Well, she sure as hell knows I ain't taking her to no doral 682 00:31:35,700 --> 00:31:38,400 for massages and mimosas all weekend. 683 00:31:39,100 --> 00:31:40,600 Hmm? = 684 00:31:40,700 --> 00:31:42,500 oh, god. I didn't leave it out. 685 00:31:42,700 --> 00:31:43,700 Well, I didn't. 686 00:31:46,200 --> 00:31:47,800 Gotta do something with my life. 687 00:31:47,800 --> 00:31:49,200 You just threw that in the spa. 688 00:31:50,000 --> 00:31:53,000 Gotta rise to a level worthy of the women who think I'm a joke. 689 00:31:53,400 --> 00:31:55,100 Well, you could go out and win the us open. 690 00:31:55,200 --> 00:31:56,200 That would impress her. 691 00:31:56,800 --> 00:31:57,400 What? 692 00:31:57,800 --> 00:31:58,800 Win the open, man. 693 00:31:59,400 --> 00:32:01,300 She'll think, "oh, you're wonderful, Roy." 694 00:32:03,800 --> 00:32:05,600 Romeo, that idea has promise. 695 00:32:05,800 --> 00:32:07,500 Are we talking about the same golf tournament, huh? 696 00:32:07,600 --> 00:32:10,100 The us open, the biggest golf tournament in the world. 697 00:32:10,200 --> 00:32:12,200 Not just the biggest golf tournament in the world, 698 00:32:12,800 --> 00:32:15,300 the most Democratic golf tournament in the world. 699 00:32:15,400 --> 00:32:16,600 What do you mean? 700 00:32:17,200 --> 00:32:18,500 - Well, I mean it's open. - So0? 701 00:32:18,700 --> 00:32:22,200 It's open. Anybody with a two handicap or better has got a shot at it. 702 00:32:22,400 --> 00:32:24,900 You just gotta get through a local and sectional qualifier, 703 00:32:25,000 --> 00:32:28,600 and unlike doral or colonial or at&t, they can't keep you out. 704 00:32:29,600 --> 00:32:32,300 They can't ask you if you're a-a garbage man or a bean picker 705 00:32:32,500 --> 00:32:35,700 or a driving-range pro whose check's signed by a stripper. 706 00:32:36,700 --> 00:32:38,500 You qualify, you're in. 707 00:32:38,600 --> 00:32:40,200 Yeah, you don't got the game, man. 708 00:32:40,200 --> 00:32:41,600 I got every shot in the book. 709 00:32:41,800 --> 00:32:43,700 I'm talking about the game. 710 00:32:44,000 --> 00:32:46,400 The mental game, you know, la cabeza. You don't got it. 711 00:32:47,400 --> 00:32:49,000 Well, since you're the authority, 712 00:32:49,100 --> 00:32:52,500 how'd you like to teach me what I ain't and never will be? 713 00:32:52,600 --> 00:32:54,000 What... what for, man? 714 00:32:54,200 --> 00:32:55,600 You never listen to me. Never. 715 00:32:56,500 --> 00:32:58,300 Well, this time will be different, 716 00:32:58,500 --> 00:32:59,600 - yeah, right. - I promise. 717 00:32:59,700 --> 00:33:02,200 You don't even have the money to get your golf clubs out of hock, 718 00:33:02,200 --> 00:33:03,800 and you're gonna win the us open. 719 00:33:04,300 --> 00:33:05,300 That don't fit, man. 720 00:33:06,100 --> 00:33:07,700 Don't force it if it don't f... 721 00:33:09,400 --> 00:33:11,700 Ahh, is that what those things were? 722 00:33:11,800 --> 00:33:13,100 - Flowers? - Flowers. 723 00:33:14,200 --> 00:33:15,400 Let me get this straight. 724 00:33:15,500 --> 00:33:17,500 You're gonna play me for $400 with those? 725 00:33:17,600 --> 00:33:21,100 Yeah, and I'll give you 2 strokes a side. 726 00:33:22,000 --> 00:33:23,600 You ain't got no 400 bucks. 727 00:33:24,100 --> 00:33:26,200 I-I got the title of my car for collateral. 728 00:33:26,800 --> 00:33:29,000 I ain't interested in that piece of shit. 729 00:33:30,800 --> 00:33:33,400 That's 'cause you think of it as transportation, Boone. 730 00:33:33,900 --> 00:33:35,300 Think of it as bragging rights. 731 00:33:36,000 --> 00:33:37,400 Think of yourself sitting around the bar 732 00:33:37,400 --> 00:33:39,900 crowing to your cronies about the Cadillac you won from me. 733 00:33:40,200 --> 00:33:41,400 They'll... 734 00:33:41,600 --> 00:33:44,600 They'll forget all about the winnebago you lost to me. 735 00:33:48,600 --> 00:33:50,700 I'll call the ins on you, you little midget. 736 00:33:51,100 --> 00:33:53,400 I'll be playing a pink lady today. 737 00:33:54,200 --> 00:33:56,500 Is that little pink fag ball supposed to intimidate me? 738 00:33:57,900 --> 00:33:59,900 Well, not unless I knock it by you. 739 00:34:00,600 --> 00:34:01,900 Louisville slugger, please. 740 00:34:02,600 --> 00:34:05,000 ♪ I'm drivin' down the highway, headed to the range ♪ 741 00:34:05,100 --> 00:34:06,300 ♪ gonna knock 'em out strong ♪ 742 00:34:06,400 --> 00:34:07,400 oh! 743 00:34:09,300 --> 00:34:10,800 ♪ got an old brown bag ♪ 744 00:34:11,100 --> 00:34:12,100 I believe you're away. 745 00:34:12,100 --> 00:34:13,600 Don't worry about it, Julio. 746 00:34:14,000 --> 00:34:16,100 I thought I caught that thing way the hell on the toe. 747 00:34:16,100 --> 00:34:19,000 ♪ there's a place for you if you're just like me ♪ 748 00:34:20,600 --> 00:34:21,300 - whoo! - You drive for show, 749 00:34:21,500 --> 00:34:23,100 and you putt for dough, big mouth. 750 00:34:23,700 --> 00:34:26,700 You hear that, Romeo? Boone was being profound. 751 00:34:27,200 --> 00:34:28,700 Let's see, little wind left to right. 752 00:34:28,700 --> 00:34:30,400 I highly recommend the shovel. 753 00:34:30,600 --> 00:34:32,000 Yeah, that's what I was thinking. 754 00:34:37,300 --> 00:34:39,300 ♪ well, there's a place for you if you're just like me ♪ 755 00:34:39,300 --> 00:34:41,000 all right, I want to see a legitimate swing. 756 00:34:41,000 --> 00:34:41,700 No scooping. 757 00:34:41,900 --> 00:34:43,300 ♪ I'm not rich, and I'm not on TV ♪ 758 00:34:43,600 --> 00:34:46,100 ♪ have another cool one, but it won't hurt j; 759 00:34:46,300 --> 00:34:48,100 ♪ got myself a big stick swingin'in the dirt ♪ 760 00:34:48,200 --> 00:34:49,200 I'll finish. 761 00:34:51,800 --> 00:34:54,300 ♪ got myself a big stick swingin'in the dirt ♪ 762 00:34:54,500 --> 00:34:55,800 get the hell off my golf course. 763 00:34:56,800 --> 00:34:58,000 Uh, need a receipt? 764 00:35:00,200 --> 00:35:01,300 You know what I think, grasshopper? 765 00:35:01,300 --> 00:35:02,800 She's got you by the huevos. 766 00:35:03,100 --> 00:35:05,700 Listen, swami, your job's to teach me Patience and humility, 767 00:35:05,800 --> 00:35:07,800 all right, not advise me on my love life. 768 00:35:08,200 --> 00:35:09,900 Not all my thinking occurs below the belt. 769 00:35:10,000 --> 00:35:11,600 I mean, I actually stand for a few things 770 00:35:11,600 --> 00:35:13,900 besides where my next romantic interlude's coming from. 771 00:35:14,100 --> 00:35:14,800 Well, then great. 772 00:35:15,000 --> 00:35:16,700 You won't have any trouble telling the doctor lady 773 00:35:16,700 --> 00:35:18,700 you can't teach her no more until after the open. 774 00:35:18,800 --> 00:35:19,900 Well, now that would make an issue 775 00:35:19,900 --> 00:35:21,600 of something that's not a issue, now wouldn't it? 776 00:35:21,600 --> 00:35:22,600 Yeah, right. 777 00:35:23,600 --> 00:35:24,700 I am! 778 00:35:25,100 --> 00:35:26,100 This is my quest! 779 00:35:26,700 --> 00:35:28,700 This is where I stand up for all the little guys everywhere 780 00:35:28,800 --> 00:35:32,500 who've had their fill of soulless robots like David Simms. 781 00:35:33,600 --> 00:35:35,300 Well, David Simms may be a soulless robot, 782 00:35:35,500 --> 00:35:37,400 but he's a rich, happy soulless robot 783 00:35:37,700 --> 00:35:39,800 with a beautiful doctor lady girlfriend. 784 00:35:40,400 --> 00:35:41,700 Besides, how's getting in the open 785 00:35:41,700 --> 00:35:43,300 gonna change what she thinks about you? 786 00:35:44,400 --> 00:35:46,700 Well, it'll show her I'm not who she thinks I am. 787 00:35:47,200 --> 00:35:49,300 But you are who she thinks you are, man. 788 00:35:49,500 --> 00:35:53,500 No, Roy, I will not give you time off to go win the open. 789 00:35:54,100 --> 00:35:55,500 I don't care if it is your quest. 790 00:35:55,700 --> 00:35:56,900 How about my destiny? 791 00:35:57,100 --> 00:35:58,400 Or your destiny. 792 00:35:58,800 --> 00:35:59,600 Or any other term 793 00:35:59,800 --> 00:36:01,300 you vaguely remember from your cliff notes. 794 00:36:01,300 --> 00:36:03,400 That's the most stupid thing I've ever seen in my life. 795 00:36:03,400 --> 00:36:05,200 Don't get mean, all right? First you get mean, then you get petty. 796 00:36:05,200 --> 00:36:08,300 You should have been a little nicer to me when we were an item, 797 00:36:08,400 --> 00:36:10,500 and maybe I wouldn't be such a nasty boss. 798 00:36:11,000 --> 00:36:14,300 Yeah. Roy, I've got a business to run. Bye-bye, bon voyage. 799 00:36:14,500 --> 00:36:16,400 You know what, Becky, Becky, Becky, come here, sweetheart. 800 00:36:16,400 --> 00:36:18,100 Right now, hurry up. We don't have a lot of time. 801 00:36:18,100 --> 00:36:20,300 Now, you're doing a natural thing, and it's really sweet, 802 00:36:20,400 --> 00:36:22,100 but you know what? We don't do natural here. 803 00:36:22,200 --> 00:36:23,700 We do big and bold. Colorful. 804 00:36:23,900 --> 00:36:25,100 Hair, lots of it, many colors. 805 00:36:25,300 --> 00:36:27,400 Look at me. That's what we do, okay? 806 00:36:30,900 --> 00:36:32,500 Well, if you're gonna take that tone, 807 00:36:32,700 --> 00:36:34,300 then we'll just have to talk another day. 808 00:36:34,300 --> 00:36:36,800 I'm sorry, uh, I have things to do, 809 00:36:37,000 --> 00:36:39,200 and I don't really need to be treated like that, 810 00:36:39,300 --> 00:36:41,400 so good-bye. 811 00:36:43,000 --> 00:36:44,500 You know, it wouldn't kill you just once 812 00:36:44,500 --> 00:36:46,500 to tell her something like that she's beautiful 813 00:36:46,600 --> 00:36:48,400 or that she can dance, or 814 00:36:48,800 --> 00:36:50,000 she's sexy as hell. 815 00:36:50,300 --> 00:36:51,500 Here I am, ready to... 816 00:36:51,600 --> 00:36:53,600 Charge forth in pursuit of my mythic destiny, 817 00:36:53,800 --> 00:36:56,200 I can't even get time off work to do it. 818 00:36:57,400 --> 00:36:59,000 Well, uh, I'm no expert here, 819 00:36:59,200 --> 00:37:02,600 but it seems to me that the pursuit of a mythic destiny 820 00:37:02,800 --> 00:37:06,300 isn't something you need to get off a $7-an-hour job in order to do. 821 00:37:06,500 --> 00:37:08,600 I'm stuck, man. I'm buried. 822 00:37:08,700 --> 00:37:09,700 I need help. 823 00:37:10,100 --> 00:37:12,900 I need advice, I need counseling. I need a... 824 00:37:14,400 --> 00:37:15,400 I need a shrink. 825 00:37:15,700 --> 00:37:17,200 You don't know no shrinks. 826 00:37:18,200 --> 00:37:19,200 I know one. 827 00:37:21,200 --> 00:37:23,500 No, no, no, no. Not the doctor lady. 828 00:37:23,900 --> 00:37:24,500 Why not? 829 00:37:24,700 --> 00:37:27,000 You can't ask advice about the woman you're trying to hose 830 00:37:27,000 --> 00:37:28,500 from the woman you're trying to hose. 831 00:37:29,700 --> 00:37:30,700 Why not? 832 00:38:11,900 --> 00:38:13,800 Jj 833 00:38:48,100 --> 00:38:49,700 Sue Ann. Sue Ann, honey. 834 00:38:49,800 --> 00:38:50,900 I didn't... I didn't say shit to her. 835 00:38:50,900 --> 00:38:52,700 Roy, oh! 836 00:38:53,500 --> 00:38:56,400 Okay, Roy, get in the other room, please. 837 00:38:58,700 --> 00:39:01,200 Sue Ann, honey, it's okay. Okay. 838 00:39:05,900 --> 00:39:08,300 Hey, look, she was crying when she came out there, all right? 839 00:39:08,500 --> 00:39:12,100 Okay, okay, Roy. Roy! That is a patient exit room. 840 00:39:12,400 --> 00:39:13,800 Well, I knew it was some kind of room. 841 00:39:13,800 --> 00:39:16,400 It wasn't painted. There was no magazines out there. 842 00:39:16,900 --> 00:39:18,600 Roy, why are you here? 843 00:39:20,400 --> 00:39:21,400 Therapy. 844 00:39:23,400 --> 00:39:24,500 You've come for therapy? 845 00:39:25,000 --> 00:39:25,600 Okay, look, Roy, 846 00:39:25,700 --> 00:39:27,700 you know, you really need to make an appointment, 847 00:39:27,700 --> 00:39:29,700 because I have a client in a half an hour. 848 00:39:30,000 --> 00:39:32,500 That's enough time, 30 minutes. Hell, I'm not that fucked up. 849 00:39:33,100 --> 00:39:34,600 Okay, Roy, you know what? Why Don"t... 850 00:39:34,700 --> 00:39:36,400 Why don't you just have a seat right there? 851 00:39:36,400 --> 00:39:37,400 Right over there. 852 00:39:41,100 --> 00:39:42,100 Okay. 853 00:39:55,900 --> 00:39:57,300 Okay, so how do I do it? 854 00:39:58,900 --> 00:39:59,600 Therapy, I mean... 855 00:39:59,700 --> 00:40:01,500 I mean, w-how do I start doing it? 856 00:40:01,700 --> 00:40:03,900 Okay, Roy, well, 857 00:40:04,400 --> 00:40:05,900 in parlance you might understand, 858 00:40:06,100 --> 00:40:08,000 just kick back and let the big dog eat. 859 00:40:14,500 --> 00:40:15,300 Suppose there's this guy, 860 00:40:15,500 --> 00:40:18,300 and he's standing on the shore of a big, wide river, 861 00:40:18,500 --> 00:40:21,300 and the river's full of all manner of disaster, you know? 862 00:40:21,500 --> 00:40:24,400 Piranhas, alligators, Eddies, currents, shit like that. 863 00:40:25,000 --> 00:40:26,900 Nobody'll even go down there to dip a toe, 864 00:40:27,200 --> 00:40:29,000 and on the other side of the river is a million bucks, 865 00:40:29,100 --> 00:40:31,800 and on this side of the river is a rowboat. 866 00:40:34,100 --> 00:40:34,600 Mm-hmm. 867 00:40:34,800 --> 00:40:35,900 I guess my question is this. 868 00:40:36,700 --> 00:40:39,900 What would possess a guy standing on shore to swim for it? 869 00:40:40,400 --> 00:40:41,400 He's an idiot. 870 00:40:41,700 --> 00:40:44,000 No, see, he's a helluva swimmer. 871 00:40:44,200 --> 00:40:46,000 See his... his problem is more like 872 00:40:46,200 --> 00:40:49,600 why does he always have to rise to the challenge? 873 00:40:50,000 --> 00:40:51,400 He's a juvenile idiot. 874 00:40:51,800 --> 00:40:53,600 You don't understand what I mean by the river. 875 00:40:53,700 --> 00:40:54,200 Roy. 876 00:40:54,600 --> 00:40:55,700 We're talking about you 877 00:40:56,000 --> 00:40:58,000 and what you like to call your inner demons, 878 00:40:58,200 --> 00:41:00,200 that human frailty you like to blather about. 879 00:41:00,700 --> 00:41:03,000 Not some mythopoetic metaphor you come up with 880 00:41:03,200 --> 00:41:06,100 in a feeble and transparent effort to do yourself credit. 881 00:41:07,300 --> 00:41:09,000 You mean you're gonna make me feel lousy? 882 00:41:09,400 --> 00:41:09,900 No. 883 00:41:10,100 --> 00:41:11,100 I came here to feel better. 884 00:41:11,100 --> 00:41:12,800 - I mean, what kind of therapy is this? - Roy. Roy, Roy, Roy. 885 00:41:12,800 --> 00:41:14,700 You don't have any inner demons. 886 00:41:15,000 --> 00:41:17,100 What you have is inner crap-ola, 887 00:41:17,200 --> 00:41:18,300 inner debris, garbage, 888 00:41:18,500 --> 00:41:20,000 loose wires, a few. 889 00:41:20,700 --> 00:41:22,000 Horseshit in staggering amounts. 890 00:41:22,200 --> 00:41:24,500 Look, I'm not some just jerk driving-range pro 891 00:41:24,700 --> 00:41:27,700 who drinks too much booze, eats too few vegetables, okay? 892 00:41:27,800 --> 00:41:29,900 Roy, could you please sit down, okay? 893 00:41:30,000 --> 00:41:31,600 'Cause... 'Cause you're getting defensive, 894 00:41:31,600 --> 00:41:34,300 and I want you to just cut to the chase and tell me why you're here. 895 00:41:37,000 --> 00:41:38,000 Woman. 896 00:41:38,200 --> 00:41:39,500 Oh, a woman. 897 00:41:40,900 --> 00:41:42,000 Have you asked her out? 898 00:41:43,100 --> 00:41:45,300 No. She's seeing a guy. I don't know how serious it is. 899 00:41:45,400 --> 00:41:47,900 But the guy's a real horse's ass if you ask me. 900 00:41:48,100 --> 00:41:50,200 Maybe if you shared your heart with this woman, 901 00:41:50,400 --> 00:41:51,600 you know, took her out to dinner, 902 00:41:51,600 --> 00:41:54,500 then it would... it would force these issues out to the open. 903 00:41:54,800 --> 00:41:56,600 Well, I'm afraid she'll say no. 904 00:41:56,900 --> 00:41:58,200 So what you're saying is that 905 00:41:58,400 --> 00:42:01,500 all your speeches about swimming across shark-infested waters 906 00:42:01,700 --> 00:42:04,100 are really about your golf game, not about your personal life. 907 00:42:04,300 --> 00:42:06,100 Oh, jeez. 908 00:42:06,300 --> 00:42:07,900 So good, we're getting a little close to the truth. 909 00:42:08,000 --> 00:42:10,300 Well, Christ, I didn't know we were gonna get into my personal life. 910 00:42:10,300 --> 00:42:11,400 Well, this is therapy, Roy. 911 00:42:11,600 --> 00:42:12,700 Well, I know, but I didn't... 912 00:42:13,700 --> 00:42:15,300 I didn't think it was that kind of therapy. 913 00:42:15,500 --> 00:42:17,000 Well, okay, let's make this simple. 914 00:42:17,200 --> 00:42:18,900 Roy, please, here, sit down right here. 915 00:42:19,600 --> 00:42:21,800 You know those risks that you love to take on the golf course? 916 00:42:21,800 --> 00:42:24,700 The ones that you talk so passionately and poetically about. 917 00:42:25,100 --> 00:42:26,700 Well, you need to apply those same risks 918 00:42:26,900 --> 00:42:29,400 to your personal life with the same passion. 919 00:42:29,800 --> 00:42:31,100 You mean I should just ask her out? 920 00:42:31,300 --> 00:42:31,900 Yes. 921 00:42:32,100 --> 00:42:34,000 And risk coming right over the top, snap, 922 00:42:34,100 --> 00:42:35,300 hooking it out of bounds left. 923 00:42:35,500 --> 00:42:36,100 Absolutely, Roy. 924 00:42:36,300 --> 00:42:37,000 Hittin' it a little thin. 925 00:42:37,200 --> 00:42:39,200 - Okay, Roy. That's good. - I'm sorry. 926 00:42:39,400 --> 00:42:44,000 Now look, all you have to do is walk up to this... this woman, wherever she is, 927 00:42:44,300 --> 00:42:46,200 look her in the eye... Look at me, Roy. 928 00:42:47,000 --> 00:42:48,100 Just look her in the eyes. 929 00:42:48,300 --> 00:42:49,800 That's right, let down your guard 930 00:42:50,000 --> 00:42:52,100 and don't try to be cool or smooth or whatever. 931 00:42:52,200 --> 00:42:54,200 Just be honest and take a risk. 932 00:42:54,500 --> 00:42:57,300 And then you know what? Whatever happens, if you act from the heart, 933 00:42:57,300 --> 00:42:58,800 you can't make a mistake. 934 00:43:16,500 --> 00:43:17,500 Dr. Griswold. 935 00:43:18,000 --> 00:43:19,000 Yes? 936 00:43:19,800 --> 00:43:21,200 I think I'm in love with you. 937 00:43:22,200 --> 00:43:24,000 - What? - From the moment I first saw you, 938 00:43:24,000 --> 00:43:27,900 I knew I was through with bar girls and strippers and motorcycle chicks, 939 00:43:28,100 --> 00:43:30,900 and when you first started talking, I was smitten with you, 940 00:43:31,000 --> 00:43:34,200 and I'm... smitten with you more every day I think about you, 941 00:43:34,300 --> 00:43:36,800 and the fact that you know I'm full of crap-ola 942 00:43:37,000 --> 00:43:39,000 only makes you even more attractive to me. 943 00:43:39,700 --> 00:43:42,100 Usually I can bullshit people, but I can't bullshit you, 944 00:43:42,300 --> 00:43:44,800 and in addition, you got... you got great legs, 945 00:43:44,900 --> 00:43:47,000 and most women, I'm thinking about 946 00:43:47,100 --> 00:43:49,700 how to get in their pants from day one, but with you I'm just... 947 00:43:51,400 --> 00:43:54,700 I'm just thinking about how to get in your heart, and... 948 00:43:55,400 --> 00:43:56,600 Roy, uh... 949 00:43:56,800 --> 00:43:58,200 - Stunned, huh? - Yeah. 950 00:44:00,100 --> 00:44:02,100 So, uh, so what about dinner? 951 00:44:02,200 --> 00:44:04,800 And, uh, we can talk about us and if we have a future 952 00:44:04,900 --> 00:44:07,000 and how to drop that horse's-ass boyfriend of yours. 953 00:44:07,100 --> 00:44:08,800 Roy, just slow down, okay? 954 00:44:09,100 --> 00:44:11,500 What? I just hit a 8-degree driver off the carpet. 955 00:44:11,700 --> 00:44:13,000 I mean, I'm staring eagle in the face. 956 00:44:13,000 --> 00:44:14,700 Okay, will you just cut the golf talk, please? 957 00:44:14,700 --> 00:44:15,800 Because this is a mistake. 958 00:44:16,100 --> 00:44:17,200 Well, I'm acting from the heart. 959 00:44:17,200 --> 00:44:18,600 How can that be a mistake? 960 00:44:19,500 --> 00:44:20,500 Right? 961 00:44:20,500 --> 00:44:22,500 Wrong, Roy, I mean... 962 00:44:23,300 --> 00:44:25,700 Shit. I didn't know you were talking about me, Roy. 963 00:44:26,200 --> 00:44:27,900 Well, would your advice have been different? 964 00:44:30,000 --> 00:44:33,300 Uh, ha. Roy... 965 00:44:36,300 --> 00:44:37,500 You know, this session is over. 966 00:44:37,500 --> 00:44:38,600 I have someone coming soon. 967 00:44:38,800 --> 00:44:40,000 I think you better leave. 968 00:44:42,700 --> 00:44:44,200 I take it your answer is no. 969 00:44:45,100 --> 00:44:48,600 Well, our relationship is, and will remain, strictly professional. 970 00:44:50,900 --> 00:44:51,900 That's it? 971 00:44:53,200 --> 00:44:54,200 Yeah. 972 00:44:58,400 --> 00:45:01,800 Well, I'm gonna qualify for the us open and kick your boyfriend's ass. 973 00:45:07,300 --> 00:45:09,600 And whatever you think of me, you should know that your boyfriend, 974 00:45:09,600 --> 00:45:12,600 he hates old people, he hates children, and he hates dogs, 975 00:45:12,800 --> 00:45:15,900 and that broad's out there crying still, all right? In the exit room. 976 00:45:16,200 --> 00:45:17,500 You're still in the exit room. 977 00:45:21,800 --> 00:45:22,800 Oh... 978 00:45:28,900 --> 00:45:29,600 Hello. 979 00:45:29,900 --> 00:45:32,500 Um, Dr. Kasseldorf, you're there. 980 00:45:33,100 --> 00:45:35,200 Wy-well, you always, uh, you always said to call 981 00:45:35,400 --> 00:45:37,600 if... if something came up tha... that confused me, 982 00:45:37,700 --> 00:45:39,500 and, uh, you know, shrinks need shrinks, 983 00:45:39,700 --> 00:45:42,200 but, uh, it happened. I mean... I mean, you said it would. 984 00:45:42,400 --> 00:45:45,900 Uh, a patient... a patient came in and thinks that he's falling in love with me. 985 00:45:46,100 --> 00:45:49,000 Well, I mean, he's not really a patient, he's... he's my golf pro, but... 986 00:45:49,400 --> 00:45:51,300 No. I know that under the circumstance, 987 00:45:51,500 --> 00:45:53,400 that I'm supposed to recommend another therapist, 988 00:45:53,500 --> 00:45:55,600 but there are no other therapists in Salome. 989 00:45:55,800 --> 00:46:00,100 I mean, he'd have to drive 100 miles to midland or Odessa, 990 00:46:00,200 --> 00:46:02,300 and I'm not sure you could count on any help there. 991 00:46:02,900 --> 00:46:06,800 Me? No, my self-esteem... My self-esteem is fine. 992 00:46:06,900 --> 00:46:08,100 My self-esteem is fine. 993 00:46:09,200 --> 00:46:10,800 Well, he's a good-looking man. 994 00:46:11,800 --> 00:46:13,800 Green eyes, I don't... I mean, I don't know... 995 00:46:13,900 --> 00:46:15,200 That's not the point, is it? 996 00:46:16,000 --> 00:46:19,500 Well, he's, you know, he's kind of cute. He's cute. 997 00:46:21,300 --> 00:46:22,300 B-but I mean... 998 00:46:25,800 --> 00:46:26,500 Okay. 999 00:46:26,600 --> 00:46:29,000 Jj 1000 00:46:29,500 --> 00:46:30,500 Okay. 1001 00:46:31,300 --> 00:46:32,300 Okay. 1002 00:46:33,800 --> 00:46:34,800 Uh-huh. 1003 00:46:48,700 --> 00:46:52,200 ♪ oh, I wish I could laugh 1004 00:46:52,800 --> 00:46:56,000 ♪ when I look way back ♪ 1005 00:46:57,400 --> 00:47:03,400 ♪ find out who stole all my dreams ♪ 1006 00:47:05,100 --> 00:47:09,500 ♪ oh, I wish it was easy ♪ 1007 00:47:09,700 --> 00:47:12,900 I to face the fact ♪ 1008 00:47:13,700 --> 00:47:20,300 ♪ there was nobody there but me ♪ 1009 00:47:30,300 --> 00:47:34,400 ♪ there was nobody there ♪ 1010 00:47:35,000 --> 00:47:36,600 «j but me ♪ 1011 00:47:36,900 --> 00:47:37,900 hello. 1012 00:47:45,100 --> 00:47:46,100 Hi. 1013 00:47:49,300 --> 00:47:51,000 You got a beautiful swing, Roy. 1014 00:47:52,100 --> 00:47:53,400 I'm a beautiful guy. 1015 00:47:54,700 --> 00:47:57,000 Look, Roy, I came here to apologize, okay? 1016 00:47:57,400 --> 00:47:58,400 For what? 1017 00:47:58,400 --> 00:48:00,200 Well, you did exactly what I said, 1018 00:48:00,400 --> 00:48:02,500 and I just poured cold water over your efforts, okay? 1019 00:48:02,600 --> 00:48:03,600 I didn't get it. 1020 00:48:04,300 --> 00:48:06,300 I'm a, like, terrible shrink probably. 1021 00:48:06,900 --> 00:48:08,800 Should've never gotten out of real estate. Shit. 1022 00:48:09,200 --> 00:48:13,100 Actually, I should've never left Ohio for that cowboy in Amarillo, but... 1023 00:48:14,300 --> 00:48:15,600 Have you ever been to Amarillo? 1024 00:48:16,400 --> 00:48:17,400 Cowboy? 1025 00:48:18,200 --> 00:48:19,900 Yeah. I mean, it's not as romantic 1026 00:48:20,100 --> 00:48:21,800 when you're actually with one, trust me. 1027 00:48:22,100 --> 00:48:23,800 I mean, so the oilman in Dallas or Houston 1028 00:48:24,000 --> 00:48:25,100 or I don't know where he was from. 1029 00:48:25,200 --> 00:48:27,400 Anyway, he just looked great after that... 1030 00:48:27,600 --> 00:48:29,700 Oh, boy. So I... that's when I went to the Gulf, 1031 00:48:29,800 --> 00:48:31,700 and I ended up in, like, trailer sales, 1032 00:48:32,200 --> 00:48:34,400 and then all those condos in corpus Christi. 1033 00:48:34,600 --> 00:48:36,900 The bottom just... Boom... fell right out of the market, 1034 00:48:37,100 --> 00:48:39,300 and I just... I needed a new gig. 1035 00:48:39,800 --> 00:48:40,800 A new gig? 1036 00:48:41,700 --> 00:48:44,500 Therapy. I mean, I took all the classes. 1037 00:48:44,700 --> 00:48:47,600 I'm, you know, legitimate, legal, certified. 1038 00:48:47,900 --> 00:48:50,300 Fuck. I'm certifiable. I'm really sorry, okay? 1039 00:48:50,800 --> 00:48:51,800 Oh, boy. 1040 00:48:53,200 --> 00:48:54,700 Ray, do you mind if I have a dough-nut. 1041 00:49:02,600 --> 00:49:03,600 Thanks. 1042 00:49:06,400 --> 00:49:07,400 Okay, look. 1043 00:49:07,700 --> 00:49:09,700 I am really flattered that you asked me out, 1044 00:49:10,500 --> 00:49:13,100 but, I mean, I can't accept because I am involved with David, and 1045 00:49:13,400 --> 00:49:14,500 well, I haven't seen any evidence 1046 00:49:14,500 --> 00:49:16,700 that he treats old people, children, or dogs badly. 1047 00:49:17,100 --> 00:49:18,500 Look, I admit, and I'm sorry. 1048 00:49:18,700 --> 00:49:20,800 I guess I got a little carried away with the David thing. 1049 00:49:20,800 --> 00:49:22,200 I just should have laid up and made my par. 1050 00:49:22,300 --> 00:49:25,200 Okay, look, Roy, I j... I just want to make a proposal, all right? 1051 00:49:27,000 --> 00:49:29,600 I mean, as long as you understand that it's strictly professional, 1052 00:49:29,800 --> 00:49:32,000 and that, you know, we're not going out together. 1053 00:49:32,200 --> 00:49:33,200 Tee it up. 1054 00:49:34,100 --> 00:49:37,300 Well, I think that I can help you with the mental aspects of the game. 1055 00:49:37,500 --> 00:49:39,800 I mean, you have, um, Romeo to be your swing doctor. 1056 00:49:40,000 --> 00:49:41,100 I could be your head doctor. 1057 00:49:41,200 --> 00:49:42,200 What, Roy? 1058 00:49:42,800 --> 00:49:45,200 Well, you just said yourself you're a crummy shrink. 1059 00:49:45,700 --> 00:49:47,500 Well, I can improve, Roy. 1060 00:49:47,800 --> 00:49:50,100 Molly, I don't even have the money to pay you. 1061 00:49:50,900 --> 00:49:53,000 - I'm broke. - Roy, you don't need any money to pay me. 1062 00:49:53,000 --> 00:49:54,200 We'll trade services. 1063 00:49:55,800 --> 00:49:59,300 I mean, you know, I'll give you my services for golf lessons, and... 1064 00:49:59,600 --> 00:50:02,200 And I can help you through the qualifying, Roy, 1065 00:50:03,500 --> 00:50:05,500 and then if you make it into the open, well... 1066 00:50:06,100 --> 00:50:08,600 I'm on my own. You'll be with David. 1067 00:50:12,100 --> 00:50:13,100 Yeah. 1068 00:50:17,100 --> 00:50:19,400 Uh, I don't... I don't... I don't really want this. 1069 00:50:20,600 --> 00:50:21,600 Okay. 1070 00:50:25,600 --> 00:50:26,900 ♪ every minute ♪ 1071 00:50:28,500 --> 00:50:29,200 third in the group, 1072 00:50:29,400 --> 00:50:31,700 playing out of Salome, Texas, Roy McAvoy. 1073 00:50:31,900 --> 00:50:35,800 ♪ every day that passes by ♪ 1074 00:50:37,600 --> 00:50:39,200 ♪ fills my spirit ♪ 1075 00:50:40,600 --> 00:50:42,700 I for a moment ♪ 1076 00:50:44,000 --> 00:50:47,400 ♪ that you're not on my mind ♪ 1077 00:50:50,100 --> 00:50:51,700 ♪ if you wonder j; 1078 00:50:53,000 --> 00:50:54,800 ♪ when I think of you ♪ 1079 00:50:56,200 --> 00:51:00,200 ♪ well, just let me put it this way ♪ 1080 00:51:02,000 --> 00:51:03,500 ♪ every minute ♪ 1081 00:51:05,800 --> 00:51:07,500 Ben hogan. Now, who's he? 1082 00:51:08,200 --> 00:51:10,300 I find him mildly attractive 1083 00:51:10,500 --> 00:51:12,300 when he's obnoxious and arrogant like this. 1084 00:51:12,700 --> 00:51:13,700 Well, good. 1085 00:51:17,400 --> 00:51:19,400 ♪ every hour ♪ 1086 00:51:20,600 --> 00:51:24,800 ♪ every day ♪ 1087 00:51:25,000 --> 00:51:26,700 these guys bugging you, boss? I can shut 'em up. 1088 00:51:26,700 --> 00:51:27,400 The way I'm swinging today, 1089 00:51:27,600 --> 00:51:30,200 nothing bugs me except insufficient applause. 1090 00:51:31,800 --> 00:51:33,000 Gimme the lumber. 1091 00:51:33,300 --> 00:51:35,100 Eh, I think you wanna hit the 2-iron, boss. 1092 00:51:36,700 --> 00:51:38,100 I said I want the big dog. 1093 00:51:39,400 --> 00:51:42,000 You got a tight par-5 here, man, with out of bounds on the left. 1094 00:51:42,300 --> 00:51:44,600 I don't think you wanna hit the driver. The 2-iron seems like the deal. 1095 00:51:44,600 --> 00:51:47,400 Well, I'm not goin' left of those trees or right of those trees. Okay? 1096 00:51:47,700 --> 00:51:49,100 I'm goin' over those trees... 1097 00:51:49,800 --> 00:51:50,800 With a little draw. 1098 00:51:50,900 --> 00:51:52,200 Yeah. = over the trees! 1099 00:51:52,600 --> 00:51:53,700 That way, I get home in 2. 1100 00:51:53,900 --> 00:51:55,400 That way, I'm puttin' for eagle. Now... 1101 00:51:56,500 --> 00:51:57,900 You don't need a eagle to qualify. 1102 00:51:58,700 --> 00:52:00,200 You need to practice playin' it safe. 1103 00:52:00,500 --> 00:52:02,700 - No mistakes with the... - Qualify? I want the course record. 1104 00:52:02,800 --> 00:52:03,800 Now give me the lumber. 1105 00:52:07,600 --> 00:52:09,200 You're not gonna listen to me, are you? 1106 00:52:10,400 --> 00:52:12,400 Even when I'm tryin' to help you, man. 1107 00:52:14,000 --> 00:52:15,900 After all these years, what, do you think I'm full of shit? 1108 00:52:15,900 --> 00:52:17,600 I think I'm gonna get penalized for slow play. 1109 00:52:17,600 --> 00:52:19,000 Now gimme the fuckin' driver. 1110 00:52:19,400 --> 00:52:21,000 You know, man, you're a head case, you know? 1111 00:52:21,000 --> 00:52:23,000 You always have been, and you always will be. 1112 00:52:23,100 --> 00:52:24,400 Well, let's ask the head doctor. 1113 00:52:24,700 --> 00:52:26,000 - Dr. Griswold? - What do I say? 1114 00:52:26,000 --> 00:52:27,000 Dr. Griswold. 1115 00:52:28,200 --> 00:52:28,700 Yes? 1116 00:52:28,900 --> 00:52:30,700 Should I hit the big dog or the 2? 1117 00:52:31,600 --> 00:52:34,600 Uh, soliciting shot selection advice is a 2-stroke penalty. 1118 00:52:35,600 --> 00:52:36,800 Trust your feelings. 1119 00:52:37,100 --> 00:52:39,400 Ha! Now, gimme the driver and shut up. 1120 00:52:43,300 --> 00:52:45,000 You want the driver? Fine. 1121 00:52:45,600 --> 00:52:46,600 Here. 1122 00:52:47,800 --> 00:52:49,400 Hit the driver, tin cup. 1123 00:52:55,300 --> 00:52:57,200 Well, I've changed my mind. Give me the 3-wood. 1124 00:52:58,900 --> 00:53:00,700 You can't throw that dogleg with a 3-wood, man. 1125 00:53:01,400 --> 00:53:02,400 You wanna bet? 1126 00:53:04,900 --> 00:53:06,600 Fine. Take the 3-wood. 1127 00:53:06,700 --> 00:53:07,400 Take it and show me 1128 00:53:07,600 --> 00:53:09,400 what a golf pro does, man. 1129 00:53:15,900 --> 00:53:17,600 Guess I'm goin' with the safe shot, boys. 1130 00:53:20,800 --> 00:53:23,000 But, you know, sometimes I fan that 2. 1131 00:53:23,800 --> 00:53:25,000 Ooo. 1132 00:53:25,400 --> 00:53:27,400 You better gimme the 3. 1133 00:53:28,300 --> 00:53:29,800 Is this normal behavior for him? 1134 00:53:30,100 --> 00:53:31,300 Well, the word "normal" and him 1135 00:53:31,300 --> 00:53:33,400 don't often collide in the same sentence. 1136 00:53:36,200 --> 00:53:39,100 And sometimes I catch that 3 a little thin, too. 1137 00:53:40,000 --> 00:53:42,100 Don't do this, Roy. = and I've hit fliers with the 4. 1138 00:53:43,300 --> 00:53:44,100 Hit the damn ball, Roy. 1139 00:53:44,300 --> 00:53:48,600 Hmm? I've hooked my 5. I've shanked the 6. 1140 00:53:48,900 --> 00:53:51,100 Skulled the 8. Fatted the 9. 1141 00:53:51,500 --> 00:53:52,800 Chili-dipped the wedge. 1142 00:53:53,700 --> 00:53:55,200 And I've bladed the sand. 1143 00:53:56,500 --> 00:53:57,600 Putter? = yeah. 1144 00:53:58,600 --> 00:54:00,700 There is old Mr. 3-wiggle, isn't there? 1145 00:54:02,000 --> 00:54:03,000 Jj 1146 00:54:06,200 --> 00:54:07,600 But then there's the 7-iron. 1147 00:54:08,900 --> 00:54:10,700 I never miss with the 7-iron. 1148 00:54:14,200 --> 00:54:15,600 Jj 1149 00:54:15,800 --> 00:54:18,000 It's the only truly safe club in my bag. 1150 00:54:20,700 --> 00:54:22,600 Well, the bag's lighter, Romeo. You happy? 1151 00:54:23,600 --> 00:54:24,800 No, I'm not happy, man. 1152 00:54:26,000 --> 00:54:27,000 I'm tired... 1153 00:54:28,800 --> 00:54:31,100 And my life's too short to sit there watch you blow up all the... 1154 00:54:31,100 --> 00:54:33,000 'Cause I done it too many times. 1155 00:54:34,500 --> 00:54:35,500 What, are you quittin'? 1156 00:54:35,600 --> 00:54:38,700 Huh. God... damn. 1157 00:54:39,200 --> 00:54:41,200 First sign of adversity, and you're quittin'? 1158 00:54:42,000 --> 00:54:43,800 God. First time you have a chance 1159 00:54:44,000 --> 00:54:45,200 to qualify for the open. 1160 00:54:45,400 --> 00:54:47,300 Jesus, what the hell is wrong with you? 1161 00:54:49,700 --> 00:54:53,300 Anybody wanna bet me I can't par in with a 7-iron? Huh? 1162 00:54:53,900 --> 00:54:55,200 Uh-uh. Uh-uh. 1163 00:54:55,700 --> 00:54:56,700 Come on, anybody? 1164 00:54:57,700 --> 00:54:59,300 No, sir. No way. 1165 00:55:01,700 --> 00:55:03,100 Doc, take the bet. 1166 00:55:03,300 --> 00:55:05,200 Roy, just shut up and hit the ball. 1167 00:55:05,500 --> 00:55:09,300 Jj 1168 00:55:12,000 --> 00:55:13,000 Okay. 1169 00:55:27,800 --> 00:55:28,900 You the man, cup. 1170 00:55:32,000 --> 00:55:33,700 ♪ it's pride against money ♪ 1171 00:55:35,600 --> 00:55:37,300 ♪ love against pride ♪ 1172 00:55:38,500 --> 00:55:40,500 ♪ drivin' all the demons ♪ 1173 00:55:41,500 --> 00:55:43,700 ♪ that I been keepin' inside ♪ 1174 00:55:44,600 --> 00:55:47,100 ♪ I always go for the long shot ♪ 1175 00:55:47,600 --> 00:55:50,100 I I never hesitate ♪ 1176 00:55:51,000 --> 00:55:53,600 ♪ when I wave to the four winds ♪ 1177 00:55:53,900 --> 00:55:56,800 ♪ I stick a finger at fate ♪ 1178 00:55:57,200 --> 00:56:00,000 ♪ it's just a character flaw ♪ 1179 00:56:00,300 --> 00:56:03,300 ♪ no matter what you saw, it don't matter at all ♪ 1180 00:56:03,500 --> 00:56:06,200 ♪ it's just a character flaw ♪ 1181 00:56:06,600 --> 00:56:09,700 ♪ it ain't against the law, it don't matter at all ♪ 1182 00:56:09,800 --> 00:56:11,900 ♪ it's just a character flaw ♪ 1183 00:56:13,900 --> 00:56:15,100 thank you, boys. 1184 00:56:15,300 --> 00:56:16,300 You survived? 1185 00:56:16,800 --> 00:56:17,800 Whoo! 1186 00:56:18,300 --> 00:56:19,300 Cervezas? 1187 00:56:19,400 --> 00:56:20,700 Si, cervezas. 1188 00:56:21,700 --> 00:56:23,100 What do you think my best shot was? 1189 00:56:23,400 --> 00:56:24,900 Was it the 7-iron on 12? 1190 00:56:25,100 --> 00:56:26,300 Pretty good one. 1191 00:56:26,400 --> 00:56:27,800 Or was it the 7-iron on 14? 1192 00:56:27,900 --> 00:56:28,500 That was tight. 1193 00:56:28,700 --> 00:56:29,300 That was better. 1194 00:56:29,500 --> 00:56:30,900 What about that bunker shot on 18, 1195 00:56:31,100 --> 00:56:34,100 which, to my recollection, was a 7-iron? 1196 00:56:34,200 --> 00:56:35,800 Yes, it was. 1197 00:56:36,000 --> 00:56:37,000 They all were good. 1198 00:56:37,300 --> 00:56:38,500 - You're definitely the man. - Hoo. 1199 00:56:38,600 --> 00:56:40,400 Hey, doc. Doc. 1200 00:56:40,600 --> 00:56:41,300 Hmm? 1201 00:56:41,500 --> 00:56:42,500 How'd I do? 1202 00:56:43,000 --> 00:56:45,200 Well, you failed miserably, Roy. 1203 00:56:45,600 --> 00:56:47,200 W-What are you talkin' about? I... 1204 00:56:47,400 --> 00:56:49,300 Did I not qualify for the sectionals? 1205 00:56:50,600 --> 00:56:53,200 I believe I did, with a 7-iron, I recall. 1206 00:56:54,200 --> 00:56:57,800 Look, your job isn't just to qualify for the open. 1207 00:56:58,500 --> 00:57:00,100 It's to prepare for the open. 1208 00:57:00,300 --> 00:57:02,500 My job is to help you prepare. 1209 00:57:02,800 --> 00:57:03,500 Thank you. 1210 00:57:03,600 --> 00:57:05,700 Now, you said trust my feelings. I did. 1211 00:57:06,800 --> 00:57:10,000 Well, I didn't know you felt like breakin' all the clubs in your bag 1212 00:57:10,000 --> 00:57:12,100 and getting in a pissing contest with your caddy, 1213 00:57:12,400 --> 00:57:13,500 who, incidentally, quit. 1214 00:57:13,600 --> 00:57:15,600 Well, he always quits. 1215 00:57:16,300 --> 00:57:17,800 He ought to be here, manana. 1216 00:57:18,000 --> 00:57:18,600 To the quitter. 1217 00:57:18,800 --> 00:57:19,800 To Rome. 1218 00:57:19,900 --> 00:57:21,100 Romeo. Romeo. 1219 00:57:21,100 --> 00:57:22,200 Yeah, the little quitter. 1220 00:57:22,400 --> 00:57:24,400 Nonetheless, nonetheless... 1221 00:57:25,500 --> 00:57:28,000 From the mental aspect, which is my domain, 1222 00:57:28,800 --> 00:57:30,000 you've regressed, Roy... 1223 00:57:30,300 --> 00:57:30,900 Oh. 1224 00:57:31,200 --> 00:57:33,900 And are fumbling somewhere between delusion and denial. 1225 00:57:34,100 --> 00:57:35,200 Regression. Delusion. Denial. 1226 00:57:35,200 --> 00:57:38,600 I mean, why you gotta use all the psychological language for? 1227 00:57:40,400 --> 00:57:41,600 Havin' a bad day, Roy? 1228 00:57:43,600 --> 00:57:44,600 No. 1229 00:57:44,700 --> 00:57:45,400 Hi, honey. 1230 00:57:45,600 --> 00:57:46,600 Hi, darlin'. 1231 00:57:49,300 --> 00:57:50,300 Shot a 65. 1232 00:57:51,900 --> 00:57:53,600 Parred the backside with a 7-iron. 1233 00:57:54,700 --> 00:57:55,300 Why? 1234 00:57:55,700 --> 00:57:58,200 Yeah, that's exactly right. Now, see, that's the question. Why? 1235 00:57:58,500 --> 00:58:00,400 Because he broke all of his other clubs. 1236 00:58:02,000 --> 00:58:03,000 Snapped 'em right in two. 1237 00:58:04,000 --> 00:58:07,100 Jesus, Roy. =I didn't break 'em all. Romeo broke two. 1238 00:58:10,100 --> 00:58:13,200 Listen, I'm on your side here. I mean, we go way back, partner, 1239 00:58:13,700 --> 00:58:16,500 and I really hope you qualify for the open, but if you do... 1240 00:58:17,100 --> 00:58:19,300 You better play with some kind of control, son, 1241 00:58:19,700 --> 00:58:21,200 or you'll get slaughtered out there. 1242 00:58:22,100 --> 00:58:24,500 Hell, good players shoot an 82 in the open. 1243 00:58:25,800 --> 00:58:29,700 You see, Roy, it means you just can't always go for it. 1244 00:58:30,200 --> 00:58:34,200 I swear to god, doc, this guy is not who you think he is. 1245 00:58:34,400 --> 00:58:36,600 Well, it's a well-known fact. If a camera's not on him, 1246 00:58:36,800 --> 00:58:38,800 he treats old people and children like dirt. 1247 00:58:39,100 --> 00:58:40,100 And dogs. 1248 00:58:40,600 --> 00:58:41,700 Jeez... 1249 00:58:41,900 --> 00:58:43,200 Yeah, don't forget dogs. 1250 00:58:43,400 --> 00:58:46,200 Okay. Okay, guys. You know what? We better go, David. 1251 00:58:46,600 --> 00:58:47,600 Ugh, come on. 1252 00:58:48,000 --> 00:58:49,000 Yeah, I guess so. 1253 00:58:49,300 --> 00:58:50,300 Come on. 1254 00:58:51,200 --> 00:58:53,200 Hey, you ever shoot par with a 7-iron? 1255 00:58:56,300 --> 00:58:57,700 Why, hell, Roy, it... 1256 00:58:58,100 --> 00:59:00,000 Never even occurred to me to try. 1257 00:59:01,600 --> 00:59:03,500 Well, I bet you $1,000 against my car 1258 00:59:03,700 --> 00:59:05,700 that I can beat you in any game... 1259 00:59:07,600 --> 00:59:09,400 Any game... You name it, with a golf club. 1260 00:59:11,300 --> 00:59:13,300 Come on, Roy, this is ridiculous. 1261 00:59:13,700 --> 00:59:14,700 What, are ya chicken? 1262 00:59:21,300 --> 00:59:24,800 What, are you gonna... gonna lay up the way you did in the masters last year? 1263 00:59:25,400 --> 00:59:27,300 Ooh! 1264 00:59:34,700 --> 00:59:35,700 Any game, I name it? 1265 00:59:35,700 --> 00:59:37,000 - Oh, David, come on. - Any game. 1266 00:59:37,000 --> 00:59:40,200 Oh, no, no, it's okay. I'm just gonna teach old Roy here a little lesson. 1267 00:59:41,300 --> 00:59:43,800 Why do men insist on measuring their dicks? 1268 00:59:49,300 --> 00:59:50,700 All right, let's measure. 1269 00:59:51,900 --> 00:59:54,000 - Fine. Let's measure. - Oh, Roy, for god's sakes, 1270 00:59:54,000 --> 00:59:55,100 I wasn't being literal. 1271 00:59:56,400 --> 00:59:57,800 Oh, David, come on, let's go. 1272 00:59:58,000 --> 01:00:00,000 Wait, wait, wait, Molly, I got this one. 1273 01:00:00,800 --> 01:00:04,400 We'll just call this part of Roy's mental preparation for the us open, 1274 01:00:04,800 --> 01:00:08,500 where the rough is deep and the Greens are slick and nerves are shattered. 1275 01:00:09,600 --> 01:00:10,600 I'll take the bet. 1276 01:00:10,600 --> 01:00:11,400 Oh, Jesus. 1277 01:00:11,600 --> 01:00:12,200 - Yes! - Yes. 1278 01:00:12,300 --> 01:00:13,400 All right! 1279 01:00:15,100 --> 01:00:17,100 What's the... what's the game? 1280 01:00:17,900 --> 01:00:19,500 Your 7-iron, Roy. 1281 01:00:21,600 --> 01:00:22,600 One swing each, 1282 01:00:23,500 --> 01:00:24,700 whoever hits it the longest. 1283 01:00:26,400 --> 01:00:27,400 That's a lock. 1284 01:00:27,700 --> 01:00:30,500 I hit the 7-iron like John Daly hits the three. 1285 01:00:30,800 --> 01:00:32,700 Winner, winner, chicken dinner! 1286 01:00:33,600 --> 01:00:35,100 Who'll take my beer? Curt? 1287 01:00:35,500 --> 01:00:36,500 Thank you. 1288 01:00:38,200 --> 01:00:39,200 Right here okay? 1289 01:00:39,600 --> 01:00:40,600 Fine with me. 1290 01:00:42,000 --> 01:00:44,300 You know, you guys are really being childish. 1291 01:00:44,400 --> 01:00:45,900 Leave this one to me, darlin'. 1292 01:00:46,200 --> 01:00:47,600 I know what I'm doin', too. 1293 01:00:48,400 --> 01:00:50,600 You know what? I'll see you both in the bar. 1294 01:00:50,800 --> 01:00:51,800 Bye. 1295 01:00:56,600 --> 01:00:57,700 Dollar bills. 1296 01:01:04,000 --> 01:01:06,500 Hey, them signs are at least 30 yards further. 1297 01:01:07,000 --> 01:01:09,300 Hey, Earl, that ball must've gone 220. 1298 01:01:09,600 --> 01:01:12,000 Nah, 227. 1299 01:01:12,600 --> 01:01:14,100 Toed her a bit, but it'll do. 1300 01:01:18,200 --> 01:01:19,300 Fine with me. 1301 01:01:20,700 --> 01:01:22,900 No, that's all right. I don't need to. 1302 01:01:24,600 --> 01:01:26,000 Well, uh, take your jacket off. 1303 01:01:26,400 --> 01:01:27,600 No. No, I'm fine. 1304 01:01:28,400 --> 01:01:30,800 You're gonna have to muscle up, big guy, to get it out there. 1305 01:01:30,800 --> 01:01:33,500 Gotta give it the old... Steroid jerk. 1306 01:01:37,500 --> 01:01:38,500 Yeah. 1307 01:01:41,800 --> 01:01:43,100 What the hell's he doin'? 1308 01:02:00,100 --> 01:02:01,800 Jj 1309 01:02:02,000 --> 01:02:03,000 Hmm... 1310 01:02:05,200 --> 01:02:07,400 Shit, he hit it down the fuckin' road, didn't he? 1311 01:02:08,500 --> 01:02:09,500 Still goin'. 1312 01:02:10,300 --> 01:02:12,900 Jj 1313 01:02:20,700 --> 01:02:23,600 Uh, you the man, Roy. You the man. 1314 01:02:24,000 --> 01:02:26,200 Oh, yeah. You are definitely the man. 1315 01:02:28,300 --> 01:02:29,300 So long, Bucko. 1316 01:02:29,500 --> 01:02:32,500 The man needs a ride home. 1317 01:02:35,600 --> 01:02:36,600 Mm-mmm. 1318 01:02:39,300 --> 01:02:40,600 I always liked that car. 1319 01:02:45,900 --> 01:02:48,000 ♪ it's early Sunday mornin'rl 1320 01:02:48,200 --> 01:02:50,100 ♪ the sun is coming up ♪ 1321 01:02:50,600 --> 01:02:52,300 I'm on the tee at 7:00 ♪ 1322 01:02:52,700 --> 01:02:54,400 ♪ I'm here to try my luck ♪ 1323 01:02:55,100 --> 01:02:57,200 ♪ they say this game's a tough one ♪ 1324 01:02:57,300 --> 01:02:59,000 ♪ but I'll give it my best shot... I 1325 01:02:59,200 --> 01:03:02,900 god, I wish Romeo were here. I'm not cut out for this shit. 1326 01:03:03,400 --> 01:03:05,800 I'm an observer by nature. I'm a spectator. 1327 01:03:06,000 --> 01:03:07,100 - Earl, shut up. - Okay. 1328 01:03:07,300 --> 01:03:08,400 Gimme the big dog. 1329 01:03:09,300 --> 01:03:10,300 Big dog. 1330 01:03:10,500 --> 01:03:12,500 I thought that was the fucking big dog. 1331 01:03:13,800 --> 01:03:15,700 ♪ help me keep my head down ♪ 1332 01:03:15,900 --> 01:03:18,700 ♪ save me from those double bogey blues 1333 01:03:23,000 --> 01:03:26,300 jj 1334 01:03:32,200 --> 01:03:34,200 ♪ first, I pull out my driver 1335 01:03:34,400 --> 01:03:36,400 ♪ I checked my stance and grip ♪ 1336 01:03:36,500 --> 01:03:38,400 ♪ I'm tryin' to remember 1337 01:03:38,800 --> 01:03:40,600 ♪ every single Nicklaus tip 1338 01:03:41,300 --> 01:03:43,500 ♪ straighten that left elbow... ♪ 1339 01:03:44,700 --> 01:03:45,900 here, why don't you let me carry it? 1340 01:03:46,000 --> 01:03:46,600 No. 1341 01:03:46,700 --> 01:03:48,200 ♪ keep your head behind the ball ♪ 1342 01:03:48,400 --> 01:03:50,000 ♪ and look out for those trees ♪ 1343 01:03:50,100 --> 01:03:51,300 ♪ oh, lord... ♪ 1344 01:03:57,100 --> 01:03:57,900 You all right? 1345 01:03:58,100 --> 01:03:59,100 Aw, shit. 1346 01:04:00,600 --> 01:04:01,600 Here, give me the bag. 1347 01:04:02,100 --> 01:04:03,100 Nah. 1348 01:04:03,700 --> 01:04:04,800 - All right. - Okay. 1349 01:04:07,400 --> 01:04:09,600 Dewey, take him in. 1350 01:04:09,800 --> 01:04:12,100 Jj 1351 01:04:17,900 --> 01:04:20,200 Come on, like a million others you made in your life, Roy. 1352 01:04:21,900 --> 01:04:23,400 Just see it goin' in. 1353 01:04:25,000 --> 01:04:26,000 Just feel it. 1354 01:04:27,400 --> 01:04:28,800 Right in the back of the jar. 1355 01:04:36,500 --> 01:04:38,700 ♪ well, I started out with three balls I 1356 01:04:38,900 --> 01:04:41,000 ♪ now two of them are lost ♪ 1357 01:04:41,300 --> 01:04:43,300 ♪ got 200 yards of water ♪ 1358 01:04:43,500 --> 01:04:45,600 ♪ that I got to get across ♪ 1359 01:04:45,800 --> 01:04:47,700 ♪ did I hear somebody talkin'? I 1360 01:04:47,900 --> 01:04:49,600 ♪ 'bout a $40 bet? ♪ 1361 01:04:50,300 --> 01:04:52,300 ♪ I got 30 in my pocket ♪ 1362 01:04:52,400 --> 01:04:54,600 ♪ but I won't let 'em see me sweat ♪ 1363 01:04:54,800 --> 01:04:55,800 ♪ oh, lord ♪ 1364 01:04:58,000 --> 01:05:01,700 can't afford to lose ♪ 1365 01:05:03,600 --> 01:05:06,200 ♪ you know I'll be in church next Sunday ♪ 1366 01:05:06,400 --> 01:05:10,300 ♪ just save me from those double bogey blues I 1367 01:05:15,100 --> 01:05:16,500 Romes, you come back. 1368 01:05:18,500 --> 01:05:20,000 Man, you should've been there. 1369 01:05:20,400 --> 01:05:22,600 I drained a 30-foot snake to qualify. 1370 01:05:23,300 --> 01:05:24,500 Earl gives me this straight read. 1371 01:05:24,500 --> 01:05:26,700 Thing breaks half a dozen times. 1372 01:05:27,100 --> 01:05:31,100 Ah, missed ya, pods. I missed ya. 1373 01:05:33,300 --> 01:05:35,800 Okay, don't talk to me, but you're still my guy. 1374 01:05:38,700 --> 01:05:40,500 Look, it's a little late to be pissed off. 1375 01:05:40,700 --> 01:05:43,300 I mean, we're in the open, you and me. 1376 01:05:46,600 --> 01:05:47,900 All right, fine, be like that. 1377 01:05:49,300 --> 01:05:50,600 Say, has Molly been around? 1378 01:05:51,400 --> 01:05:54,100 You know what? Neither her nor me nor the god of golf himself 1379 01:05:54,300 --> 01:05:56,300 is gonna keep you from blowin' up in the open. 1380 01:05:56,900 --> 01:05:58,500 Well, I made it this far, didn't 1? 1381 01:05:58,600 --> 01:05:59,600 Didn't 1? Didn't 1? 1382 01:05:59,800 --> 01:06:02,600 All I gotta do is hold it together for 72 more holes. 1383 01:06:03,700 --> 01:06:06,800 There's a lot of triple bogeys waiting out there to grab your skinny white ass. 1384 01:06:07,200 --> 01:06:09,900 Are you complainin' again? Is that... is that what I hear? 1385 01:06:10,100 --> 01:06:11,100 - Shut up. - Are you complaining again? 1386 01:06:11,100 --> 01:06:13,300 You're back, whinin' and bitchin', 1387 01:06:13,500 --> 01:06:17,100 pissin' and moanin'. You're back! Huh? You're my man. 1388 01:06:18,200 --> 01:06:20,300 You didn't fall in love with Earl to be your caddy? 1389 01:06:20,700 --> 01:06:21,300 Oh, Earl. 1390 01:06:21,400 --> 01:06:23,700 Jeez, he's a wheezin' heart attack waitin' to happen. 1391 01:06:24,300 --> 01:06:25,900 Cost me 3 strokes a side. 1392 01:06:27,100 --> 01:06:29,300 Hell, I had to carry the bag the last 4 holes. 1393 01:06:33,500 --> 01:06:37,900 Look, I love old Earl, okay, but I need you. 1394 01:06:39,800 --> 01:06:40,800 You don't love me? 1395 01:06:42,200 --> 01:06:45,700 Well, yeah. Yeah, I love you, too, god damn it. 1396 01:06:46,800 --> 01:06:48,000 Well, as much as Earl? 1397 01:06:48,900 --> 01:06:50,300 I don't know. I mean... 1398 01:06:51,000 --> 01:06:53,300 When I was with Earl, I was thinkin' of you. 1399 01:06:54,000 --> 01:06:55,600 Yes, uh... 1400 01:06:57,400 --> 01:06:58,500 As much as Earl. 1401 01:06:59,600 --> 01:07:00,600 More than Earl. 1402 01:07:02,600 --> 01:07:03,900 More than Earl. 1403 01:07:05,600 --> 01:07:06,600 Am I special? 1404 01:07:10,300 --> 01:07:12,300 Well, if you can remove the sexual overtones 1405 01:07:12,500 --> 01:07:14,700 in that, uh, golf theme, then, Romeo... 1406 01:07:15,300 --> 01:07:16,600 I am your Juliet. 1407 01:07:20,900 --> 01:07:23,400 In that case, Julieta... 1408 01:07:24,800 --> 01:07:26,200 I am your caddy one more time. 1409 01:07:35,600 --> 01:07:37,200 So nobody's heard from Molly, huh? 1410 01:07:37,400 --> 01:07:38,900 You got it bad, huh? 1411 01:07:39,600 --> 01:07:41,000 Somethin' about that chick. 1412 01:07:42,100 --> 01:07:43,300 Somethin' about that chick. 1413 01:07:47,000 --> 01:07:48,300 Little chili-Dipper there. 1414 01:07:49,000 --> 01:07:50,300 Hey, be sure to do that in the open. 1415 01:07:50,300 --> 01:07:51,300 It really impresses 'em. 1416 01:08:00,300 --> 01:08:01,300 Rome... 1417 01:08:01,700 --> 01:08:02,700 Yeah, I'm watchin'. 1418 01:08:02,900 --> 01:08:04,000 That ain't no chili-Dipper. 1419 01:08:04,100 --> 01:08:07,200 Looks like you got El Hosel. The laterals. 1420 01:08:07,900 --> 01:08:08,900 You know, the "s" word? 1421 01:08:09,400 --> 01:08:10,400 What am I doin' wrong? 1422 01:08:10,800 --> 01:08:12,200 I don't know. The shanks are like a virus. 1423 01:08:12,300 --> 01:08:13,300 They just show up. 1424 01:08:13,700 --> 01:08:15,000 Nobody can figure 'em out. 1425 01:08:23,200 --> 01:08:24,200 Romes... 1426 01:08:24,600 --> 01:08:25,100 Yeah. 1427 01:08:25,400 --> 01:08:26,700 Somethin's terribly wrong. 1428 01:08:27,400 --> 01:08:29,100 Rome, somethin's wrong. 1429 01:08:29,400 --> 01:08:30,500 That's okay. 1430 01:08:31,100 --> 01:08:33,700 Well? Well, what's your guess? 1431 01:08:34,600 --> 01:08:35,700 It's gotta be the woman. 1432 01:08:36,300 --> 01:08:37,600 I thought you said it was a virus. 1433 01:08:37,600 --> 01:08:40,400 Well, a woman can have the same effect. 1434 01:08:41,500 --> 01:08:43,200 What, uh, what do I do? 1435 01:08:44,000 --> 01:08:47,500 Um... j-just keep swingin'. 1436 01:08:48,100 --> 01:08:49,300 Go on. You're fine. 1437 01:08:58,700 --> 01:08:59,900 Don't say a fuckin' word. 1438 01:09:06,600 --> 01:09:08,900 Um, I'm inside if you need me. 1439 01:09:21,100 --> 01:09:22,400 Just work it out. 1440 01:09:25,000 --> 01:09:28,900 Jj 1441 01:09:41,400 --> 01:09:45,900 Jj 1442 01:09:56,900 --> 01:09:59,800 Hello? Is anybody home? 1443 01:10:07,600 --> 01:10:09,000 My god... Roy. 1444 01:10:09,200 --> 01:10:10,200 Dr. Griswold. 1445 01:10:13,600 --> 01:10:15,200 The therapist laughs at the patient? 1446 01:10:16,100 --> 01:10:17,700 Huh? Is that how it works? 1447 01:10:18,600 --> 01:10:19,600 Is that how it works? 1448 01:10:19,800 --> 01:10:21,600 - No. - Man's laid bare before god, 1449 01:10:21,800 --> 01:10:23,700 he's the butt of a cosmic joke? 1450 01:10:24,100 --> 01:10:26,200 I'm sorry. I'm really sorry. 1451 01:10:26,700 --> 01:10:29,000 Some of this shit might actually work, you know. I mean... 1452 01:10:30,100 --> 01:10:31,600 I think there's somethin' to this hat, 1453 01:10:32,400 --> 01:10:34,100 the golf ball pendulum thing. 1454 01:10:35,600 --> 01:10:36,800 Could be onto somethin' here. 1455 01:10:37,000 --> 01:10:38,500 Oh, Jesus, Roy. 1456 01:10:39,300 --> 01:10:40,500 I mean, quoting yourself, 1457 01:10:40,700 --> 01:10:44,100 it is paraphernalia for lost and desperate souls. 1458 01:10:44,300 --> 01:10:48,600 Well, a lost and desperate soul stands before you. 1459 01:10:50,000 --> 01:10:52,600 I assume I have the confidentiality 1460 01:10:52,800 --> 01:10:54,100 of the doctor-client... 1461 01:10:54,900 --> 01:10:56,600 Privilege in regards to this outfit. 1462 01:10:56,800 --> 01:10:59,300 Of course you do. Now, what happened? 1463 01:10:59,600 --> 01:11:03,800 Well... I got the shanks. 1464 01:11:04,300 --> 01:11:05,600 Are you taking penicillin? 1465 01:11:05,800 --> 01:11:07,600 There's a glitch in my swing. 1466 01:11:07,900 --> 01:11:09,600 Well, that's Romeo's department. 1467 01:11:09,800 --> 01:11:13,400 No, he thinks it's your department. Says it's a head thing. 1468 01:11:13,600 --> 01:11:17,100 Oh. Well, uh, I just came over 1469 01:11:17,200 --> 01:11:21,400 to congratulate you on the, um, sectionals and to return your car. 1470 01:11:21,500 --> 01:11:22,700 I mean, David said he doesn't want it. 1471 01:11:22,700 --> 01:11:25,900 Just wanted to make a point. You know what, Roy? Look. 1472 01:11:26,700 --> 01:11:29,900 You know what? I suppose that we could have a therapy session 1473 01:11:30,100 --> 01:11:31,300 right here and now. 1474 01:11:33,200 --> 01:11:35,300 I don't want therapy, okay? 1475 01:11:36,800 --> 01:11:37,900 I want you. 1476 01:11:43,100 --> 01:11:44,200 I want you. 1477 01:11:45,800 --> 01:11:47,000 I gotta get some air, Roy. 1478 01:11:47,300 --> 01:11:48,300 Molly... 1479 01:11:49,600 --> 01:11:51,200 Molly. Molly, wait. 1480 01:11:52,200 --> 01:11:54,300 Molly, look at me. 1481 01:11:57,900 --> 01:12:00,800 Well, not at the moment, but just listen to me. 1482 01:12:05,500 --> 01:12:06,700 You're with the wrong guy. 1483 01:12:07,900 --> 01:12:09,000 I'm the right guy. 1484 01:12:10,600 --> 01:12:14,600 I mean everyone... everyone says my face is screwed up tight as a drum. 1485 01:12:15,300 --> 01:12:18,000 I know it's 'cause I been crazy about you 1486 01:12:18,200 --> 01:12:19,800 from the moment you came here, 1487 01:12:20,000 --> 01:12:21,600 when you were wearin' all this stupid shit. 1488 01:12:23,100 --> 01:12:25,000 The whole damn thing's both inspired me to get here 1489 01:12:25,000 --> 01:12:27,500 and also 'caused me to get the shanks, 1490 01:12:27,700 --> 01:12:30,200 which could humiliate me in front of a billion, zillion people 1491 01:12:30,400 --> 01:12:33,600 in a game I used to... used to know how to play pretty good. 1492 01:12:35,500 --> 01:12:36,700 Such is life. 1493 01:12:40,500 --> 01:12:42,400 So dump that phony bastard you're with 1494 01:12:42,600 --> 01:12:44,600 and come to the open in my corner, okay? 1495 01:12:46,000 --> 01:12:48,900 Tell me... Tell me you're not just like at least 1496 01:12:50,300 --> 01:12:51,900 moderately attracted to me. 1497 01:12:53,200 --> 01:12:55,200 You have moments, Roy. 1498 01:12:55,400 --> 01:12:57,300 Yeah? Well, you tell me which ones are my moments, 1499 01:12:57,300 --> 01:12:58,900 and I'll try and duplicate them. 1500 01:13:00,100 --> 01:13:01,100 This is a moment. 1501 01:13:01,300 --> 01:13:02,300 Now? 1502 01:13:02,500 --> 01:13:05,700 Yeah. I mean, just utterly exposed, 1503 01:13:05,900 --> 01:13:07,200 completely vulnerable, 1504 01:13:07,400 --> 01:13:08,700 inner child trying to get out. 1505 01:13:08,900 --> 01:13:11,500 Yeah? My inner child needs a spankin'? 1506 01:13:11,700 --> 01:13:13,800 Yeah. No, Roy. No, Roy. 1507 01:13:17,500 --> 01:13:18,500 Oh. 1508 01:13:20,900 --> 01:13:22,200 I, uh, don't have a car. 1509 01:13:23,100 --> 01:13:24,400 Need a ride. 1510 01:13:24,800 --> 01:13:26,500 I know. 1511 01:13:35,000 --> 01:13:36,400 ♪ you're like a cool breeze... ♪ 1512 01:13:36,500 --> 01:13:37,100 Roy... 1513 01:13:37,300 --> 01:13:38,900 ♪ to a hot spell... ♪ 1514 01:13:41,100 --> 01:13:42,900 I know a spot along the river, it's... 1515 01:13:43,900 --> 01:13:46,200 It's great to watch sunsets. Ll do. 1516 01:13:46,300 --> 01:13:47,000 Watch the road. 1517 01:13:47,200 --> 01:13:48,900 I know a spot by the river that's great for sunsets. 1518 01:13:48,900 --> 01:13:51,800 I bet you do, Roy. Not tonight. 1519 01:13:53,900 --> 01:13:55,900 Not tonight means maybe some other night. 1520 01:13:56,100 --> 01:13:57,600 No, I didn't mean it like that. 1521 01:13:58,000 --> 01:13:59,600 Maybe consciously you didn't mean it that way, 1522 01:13:59,700 --> 01:14:01,100 but how about unconsciously? 1523 01:14:02,200 --> 01:14:03,300 Come on, you're the expert. 1524 01:14:03,400 --> 01:14:04,600 Did you mean it unconsciously? 1525 01:14:04,800 --> 01:14:09,000 Roy, unconsciously, I don't have a clue what I'm talkin' about. 1526 01:14:10,500 --> 01:14:12,100 I feel we're makin' progress. 1527 01:14:12,500 --> 01:14:13,600 Well, I do, too. 1528 01:14:14,200 --> 01:14:17,300 I have no idea what it's progress towards, though. None. 1529 01:14:18,300 --> 01:14:20,300 Consciously or unconsciously? 1530 01:14:20,600 --> 01:14:21,900 Oh, Roy. 1531 01:14:22,100 --> 01:14:25,900 ♪ you're like a sweet spot to these tired eyes ♪ 1532 01:14:26,200 --> 01:14:30,100 ♪ you're like the last mile on a long ride I 1533 01:14:30,600 --> 01:14:32,600 I till the end of time ♪ 1534 01:14:32,800 --> 01:14:34,700 ♪ baby, I can start ♪ 1535 01:14:34,900 --> 01:14:38,700 ♪ if you just let me into your heart ♪ 1536 01:14:38,900 --> 01:14:41,400 well, it may not be much of a river to you, but to me it's the... 1537 01:14:43,200 --> 01:14:45,100 Mississippi, the Rio Grande, the... 1538 01:14:46,200 --> 01:14:48,700 The Danube, the Amazon... 1539 01:14:48,800 --> 01:14:51,700 Wow, the Amazon? I don't know about the Amazon, Roy. 1540 01:14:55,300 --> 01:14:58,400 [Scoffs[I come on, Molly. I mean, isn't it obvious to you that you and me are... 1541 01:14:58,500 --> 01:15:02,000 As comfortable together as a couple of old shoes? 1542 01:15:02,400 --> 01:15:06,100 Old shoes? Oh, Roy. 1543 01:15:09,700 --> 01:15:12,200 Look, David... David's a really good person. 1544 01:15:15,600 --> 01:15:17,800 Whenever anybody says they're with a really good person, 1545 01:15:18,000 --> 01:15:19,000 it means they're... 1546 01:15:19,300 --> 01:15:21,400 It means they're about to leave 'em. 1547 01:15:22,300 --> 01:15:24,000 You know, you're awfully judgmental. 1548 01:15:24,700 --> 01:15:25,700 Well... 1549 01:15:29,600 --> 01:15:31,200 It's one of my few redeeming virtues. 1550 01:15:34,000 --> 01:15:36,400 You know, look, David's involved in a lot of charity work. 1551 01:15:36,600 --> 01:15:37,700 Gets his name in the paper. 1552 01:15:37,700 --> 01:15:39,700 No. Roy, no. Let me just finish. 1553 01:15:39,900 --> 01:15:42,600 I mean I... he's a sensitive person, and a lot of people don't see it. 1554 01:15:42,700 --> 01:15:44,100 Well, so am I. I mean, hell, I'm... 1555 01:15:44,800 --> 01:15:47,000 Shit, I'm twice as sensitive as he is. 1556 01:15:47,600 --> 01:15:51,000 I mean, I... hell, I brought you to the river. I mean, that's a... 1557 01:15:51,800 --> 01:15:53,300 That's a nature kind of thing, isn't it? 1558 01:15:54,700 --> 01:15:56,600 Yeah, it is a nature kind of thing, Roy. 1559 01:15:56,700 --> 01:15:58,900 It is a very nice river. Thank you. 1560 01:16:00,200 --> 01:16:01,200 But that's not the point. 1561 01:16:01,400 --> 01:16:03,300 The point is is that David is there for me. 1562 01:16:03,700 --> 01:16:08,100 Oh, god. Not the "he's a very good person 1563 01:16:08,200 --> 01:16:09,900 and he's there for me thing." I mean... 1564 01:16:10,100 --> 01:16:11,500 L-let me be your shrink for a minute. 1565 01:16:11,500 --> 01:16:13,000 You know what, that's not a good idea. 1566 01:16:13,100 --> 01:16:15,900 You're startin' to sound like a woman who's lookin' for a way out. 1567 01:16:20,000 --> 01:16:21,000 Warm? 1568 01:16:23,300 --> 01:16:24,400 That's enough, Roy. 1569 01:16:27,300 --> 01:16:29,300 Okay. I'm sorry. 1570 01:16:44,800 --> 01:16:47,400 - We could kiss. - Oh, jeez, Roy. 1571 01:16:47,700 --> 01:16:49,200 Look, no harm, no foul. 1572 01:16:49,400 --> 01:16:51,500 Just a little, small, innocent, 1573 01:16:51,700 --> 01:16:55,800 you know, kind of... Kind of a... semi... 1574 01:16:57,100 --> 01:16:57,800 Platonic. 1575 01:16:58,000 --> 01:16:59,000 Roy... 1576 01:17:02,600 --> 01:17:05,100 Roy, there's no such thing as 1577 01:17:05,400 --> 01:17:07,100 semi-platonic, Roy. 1578 01:17:09,300 --> 01:17:10,300 There ought to be. 1579 01:17:14,800 --> 01:17:16,400 I think you better take me home. 1580 01:17:32,300 --> 01:17:35,800 Jj 1581 01:17:44,800 --> 01:17:47,900 Well, good luck in the open, Roy. 1582 01:18:06,100 --> 01:18:08,700 ♪ when I was younger, I believed ♪ 1583 01:18:09,600 --> 01:18:11,900 ♪ that dreams came true ♪ 1584 01:18:12,700 --> 01:18:15,100 ♪ now I wonder 1585 01:18:16,000 --> 01:18:19,400 ♪ 'cause I've seen much more dark skies ♪ 1586 01:18:19,700 --> 01:18:21,500 I than of blue 1587 01:18:22,700 --> 01:18:24,300 ♪ now I wonder 1588 01:18:26,100 --> 01:18:29,500 ♪ I keep on prayin' for blue skies ♪ 1589 01:18:31,200 --> 01:18:34,500 ♪ I keep on thinkin' of the good times ♪ 1590 01:18:35,500 --> 01:18:39,200 ♪ will they ever come again? ♪ 1591 01:18:39,900 --> 01:18:42,100 ♪ now I wonder 1592 01:18:43,400 --> 01:18:47,100 jj 1593 01:18:55,600 --> 01:18:59,700 ♪ will they ever come again? ♪ 1594 01:19:00,100 --> 01:19:02,200 ♪ now I wonder 1595 01:19:05,000 --> 01:19:07,200 ♪ oh, I wonder ♪ 1596 01:19:31,700 --> 01:19:33,700 Jj 1597 01:19:45,900 --> 01:19:47,400 It's got your name on it, man. 1598 01:19:47,400 --> 01:19:49,000 Wow, they spelled it right and everything. 1599 01:19:49,000 --> 01:19:51,300 Hey, look, it's Lee Janzen and Billy Mayfair, man. 1600 01:19:53,700 --> 01:19:55,200 They look just like they do on TV. 1601 01:19:55,500 --> 01:19:56,500 Look at these balls. 1602 01:19:59,500 --> 01:20:02,300 Look at these balls. Brand-new titlist. 1603 01:20:02,500 --> 01:20:03,200 Brand-new? 1604 01:20:03,400 --> 01:20:05,800 Look at 'em. Every one of them, brand-new titlist. 1605 01:20:05,900 --> 01:20:06,900 Whoa. 1606 01:20:07,900 --> 01:20:08,300 Jeez. 1607 01:20:08,500 --> 01:20:10,400 Sneak a few in the bag when you get a chance. 1608 01:20:11,000 --> 01:20:14,300 We swipe enough free shit, we might even pay for this fiasco. 1609 01:20:15,500 --> 01:20:17,300 Do you think it would be inappropriate 1610 01:20:17,300 --> 01:20:18,900 if I asked Lee Janzen for his autograph? 1611 01:20:19,200 --> 01:20:20,800 I think that's a dead giveaway, Romes, 1612 01:20:21,000 --> 01:20:22,200 but if I still got the shanks, 1613 01:20:22,200 --> 01:20:23,700 we're gonna be found out soon enough. 1614 01:20:25,000 --> 01:20:28,100 Oh. Hit the 7. You always hit that good. 1615 01:20:28,900 --> 01:20:30,000 Good thinkin', pods. 1616 01:20:30,300 --> 01:20:32,300 Sweet swing. Come on, man. 1617 01:20:33,900 --> 01:20:35,400 Keep your head down and follow through. 1618 01:20:35,500 --> 01:20:36,600 You're makin' me nervous. 1619 01:20:36,600 --> 01:20:37,600 All right. 1620 01:20:41,800 --> 01:20:42,800 Whoa! Hey 1621 01:20:42,900 --> 01:20:45,000 - who hit that shot? - Yeah, who hit that? 1622 01:20:45,300 --> 01:20:46,600 - Anybody see? - Watch out. 1623 01:20:46,600 --> 01:20:47,900 There's supposed to be pros here. 1624 01:20:48,800 --> 01:20:50,100 A little thin, boss. 1625 01:20:50,100 --> 01:20:51,200 Little fucking thin. 1626 01:20:51,400 --> 01:20:52,900 Jesus Christ, I still got the shanks. 1627 01:20:53,100 --> 01:20:53,900 Don't worry about it, man. 1628 01:20:54,100 --> 01:20:54,900 Everybody's watchin' me. 1629 01:20:55,100 --> 01:20:56,100 Nobody's watchin'. 1630 01:20:56,300 --> 01:20:58,100 Just hit another one. Come on, just stand up there, man. 1631 01:20:58,200 --> 01:20:59,700 - You can do it. All right. - All right. 1632 01:21:11,000 --> 01:21:11,700 - Whoa. - Look out! 1633 01:21:11,800 --> 01:21:12,800 Ho! 1634 01:21:13,900 --> 01:21:15,900 Hey, partner, uh, you know, the guys down the line 1635 01:21:16,000 --> 01:21:17,100 are a little concerned about that. 1636 01:21:17,100 --> 01:21:17,900 What's your name? Tin cup? 1637 01:21:18,000 --> 01:21:19,500 Yeah, Roy McAvoy from west Texas. 1638 01:21:19,700 --> 01:21:20,700 We're, uh, from west Texas. 1639 01:21:20,800 --> 01:21:22,500 Uh, why don't you try aiming a little left... 1640 01:21:22,600 --> 01:21:25,000 Why don't you try backing up, giving me just a little room? 1641 01:21:29,400 --> 01:21:30,900 Hey, man, that's Johnny Miller. 1642 01:21:30,900 --> 01:21:32,400 Don't give a flying fuck who it is. 1643 01:21:32,600 --> 01:21:33,900 Jesus, cup. 1644 01:21:34,700 --> 01:21:35,700 He can't do that. 1645 01:21:35,800 --> 01:21:37,300 Hey, no problem. Who do you want it to? 1646 01:21:37,400 --> 01:21:39,700 To Romeo. To Romeo, uh... My best friend. 1647 01:21:40,200 --> 01:21:41,900 - Ooh! - Well, good luck to you, guys. 1648 01:21:42,400 --> 01:21:44,800 You might want to make some plane reservations Friday, though. 1649 01:21:44,800 --> 01:21:46,900 Okay, thanks, Mr. Miller. Hey, great open in '73, boy. 1650 01:21:47,100 --> 01:21:48,200 Okay, thank you. 1651 01:21:48,200 --> 01:21:50,300 - What a nice guy. - Yeah. Did you get his autograph? 1652 01:21:50,400 --> 01:21:52,000 Yeah. Look. "To my best friend, Romeo." 1653 01:21:52,200 --> 01:21:53,400 - Do you see who's over there? - What? 1654 01:21:53,500 --> 01:21:56,200 - Jesus Christ. - It's only an autograph, man. 1655 01:21:57,100 --> 01:21:58,300 Simms is here. 1656 01:22:01,900 --> 01:22:04,300 Aw, shit. Maybe you should hit your putter. 1657 01:22:04,500 --> 01:22:05,500 You can't shank that one. 1658 01:22:05,500 --> 01:22:07,000 Look, you're the Mexican Mac O'Grady. 1659 01:22:07,100 --> 01:22:09,000 You gotta figure out why I'm still shanking the ball. 1660 01:22:09,000 --> 01:22:10,300 - You know. - What's the problem? 1661 01:22:10,300 --> 01:22:11,300 Oh, shoot. 1662 01:22:11,600 --> 01:22:12,700 I'm catching on the hosel, right? 1663 01:22:12,700 --> 01:22:13,900 Yeah, right, right, right. 1664 01:22:14,300 --> 01:22:15,600 Moving my head? = yeah. 1665 01:22:16,100 --> 01:22:18,000 - I'm laying it off? - Well, that, too. 1666 01:22:18,400 --> 01:22:19,400 I'm pronating. 1667 01:22:19,600 --> 01:22:20,600 When you're not supinating. 1668 01:22:20,700 --> 01:22:22,500 I'm clearing too early, I'm clearing too late. 1669 01:22:22,700 --> 01:22:25,600 My god, my swing feels like an unfolding lawn chair! 1670 01:22:26,200 --> 01:22:27,200 All right. 1671 01:22:29,200 --> 01:22:31,500 Take all your change and put it in your left-hand pocket. 1672 01:22:32,000 --> 01:22:32,700 Go on, do it, Roy. 1673 01:22:32,900 --> 01:22:33,900 All right. 1674 01:22:37,900 --> 01:22:40,400 All right, now... Tie your left shoe in a double knot. 1675 01:22:41,200 --> 01:22:43,000 - Tie my left shoe... - Right now, Roy! Do it! 1676 01:22:50,500 --> 01:22:51,800 Turn your hat around backwards. 1677 01:22:52,100 --> 01:22:54,100 Turn your hat around! Do it, Roy! 1678 01:22:58,900 --> 01:23:01,100 Now take this tee and stick it... 1679 01:23:02,400 --> 01:23:03,400 Behind your left ear. 1680 01:23:04,700 --> 01:23:07,400 Stick it... I look like a fool! 1681 01:23:07,700 --> 01:23:09,200 Well, what the hell do you think you look like 1682 01:23:09,200 --> 01:23:11,400 shooting them chili peppers up Lee Janzen's ass? 1683 01:23:13,800 --> 01:23:14,900 Now, you do it right now, Roy, 1684 01:23:14,900 --> 01:23:16,200 or I swear to god, I'm gonna quit. 1685 01:23:16,300 --> 01:23:17,900 - I swear to god, I'll quit. - All right. 1686 01:23:19,300 --> 01:23:20,300 All right, good. 1687 01:23:20,900 --> 01:23:22,000 Now take this little ball, 1688 01:23:22,400 --> 01:23:23,800 hit it the hell up the fairway. 1689 01:23:24,400 --> 01:23:25,400 You're ready. 1690 01:23:40,300 --> 01:23:41,300 How'd I do that? 1691 01:23:41,500 --> 01:23:43,400 'Cause you're not thinking about shanking. 1692 01:23:43,700 --> 01:23:45,400 You're not thinking about the doctor lady. 1693 01:23:45,600 --> 01:23:46,700 You're not thinking, period! 1694 01:23:47,100 --> 01:23:48,400 You're just looking like a fool. 1695 01:23:48,700 --> 01:23:50,300 And you're hitting the ball pure and simple, 1696 01:23:50,300 --> 01:23:51,800 - and that's your natural... - Fuck you. 1697 01:23:51,800 --> 01:23:54,400 Fuck me, huh? Well, you're cured. 1698 01:23:56,200 --> 01:23:57,200 I'm c... that's it? 1699 01:23:57,400 --> 01:23:58,700 Yeah, that's it. 1700 01:23:59,400 --> 01:24:01,100 Your brain was getting in the way. 1701 01:24:03,300 --> 01:24:05,000 That's hardly ever been the case, but... 1702 01:24:05,600 --> 01:24:07,000 Well, no shit, Sherlock. 1703 01:24:07,200 --> 01:24:08,200 Well, what next? 1704 01:24:08,700 --> 01:24:11,100 Well... I should recommend 1705 01:24:11,300 --> 01:24:12,800 that you work on your short game, but... 1706 01:24:13,900 --> 01:24:15,100 I think you oughta get drunk. 1707 01:24:15,300 --> 01:24:16,800 Get drunk? = yeah. 1708 01:24:17,300 --> 01:24:19,000 You always play better when you're wasted. 1709 01:24:21,100 --> 01:24:22,100 Remember Brownsville? 1710 01:24:24,800 --> 01:24:25,400 Come on, get it down. 1711 01:24:25,600 --> 01:24:26,900 Come on, now. What time I tee off? 1712 01:24:27,000 --> 01:24:29,400 You tee off at 7:08. We're the first guys going. 1713 01:24:29,600 --> 01:24:32,000 - Come on, one more. Just do it. - Hey. 1714 01:24:32,200 --> 01:24:33,400 Let's go, come on. Get it down. 1715 01:24:33,500 --> 01:24:34,200 That's 4 hours from now. 1716 01:24:34,400 --> 01:24:35,400 That's right. 1717 01:24:39,700 --> 01:24:41,200 Here's to the finely tuned athlete 1718 01:24:41,400 --> 01:24:43,100 on the verge of greatness. 1719 01:24:45,700 --> 01:24:46,700 Ail 1720 01:24:53,300 --> 01:24:55,800 Jj 1721 01:24:57,900 --> 01:24:58,900 Hurry up, boss. 1722 01:24:59,100 --> 01:25:00,100 Jj 1723 01:25:00,200 --> 01:25:01,800 I knew we should've set an alarm. 1724 01:25:04,200 --> 01:25:06,300 With the honor in the 7:08 pairing, 1725 01:25:06,500 --> 01:25:09,800 from salami, Texas, Mr. Roy McAvoy. 1726 01:25:10,800 --> 01:25:12,400 Uh, any time for a quick bucket? 1727 01:25:12,700 --> 01:25:13,700 Tee it up. 1728 01:25:14,700 --> 01:25:15,700 Okay, boss. 1729 01:25:16,100 --> 01:25:17,400 We almost missed the starting time 1730 01:25:17,500 --> 01:25:18,700 trying to get you off the floor. 1731 01:25:19,000 --> 01:25:19,800 If I may say so, 1732 01:25:20,000 --> 01:25:21,700 you don't handle the hooch like you used to. 1733 01:25:23,300 --> 01:25:24,700 Oh, I've seen this hole on TV. 1734 01:25:25,300 --> 01:25:26,700 Just hit the big dog up the chute there. 1735 01:25:26,800 --> 01:25:27,800 No. I've learned my lesson. 1736 01:25:28,000 --> 01:25:30,500 I'm gonna play it... Safe, smart... 1737 01:25:31,700 --> 01:25:32,700 Conservative. 1738 01:25:33,900 --> 01:25:35,700 Fairways and Greens. Hand me a 2-iron. 1739 01:25:36,900 --> 01:25:37,900 You sure? 1740 01:25:39,200 --> 01:25:40,200 Yeah. 1741 01:25:43,300 --> 01:25:44,300 Okay. 1742 01:25:46,300 --> 01:25:47,300 Ohh. 1743 01:25:47,900 --> 01:25:48,900 Uhh. 1744 01:25:51,000 --> 01:25:52,100 Not a good day. 1745 01:25:53,500 --> 01:25:54,600 Be humble. 1746 01:26:01,800 --> 01:26:02,700 Be humble. 1747 01:26:02,800 --> 01:26:03,800 83. 1748 01:26:04,800 --> 01:26:06,200 Well, you're humble now, homes. 1749 01:26:06,800 --> 01:26:07,800 I was hung over. 1750 01:26:10,300 --> 01:26:11,700 Maybe that was a coaching mistake on my part. 1751 01:26:11,700 --> 01:26:14,000 Yeah, maybe it was. Thanks, amigo. 1752 01:26:15,300 --> 01:26:17,200 David Simms is the first-round leader 1753 01:26:17,300 --> 01:26:19,900 at the us open after a brilliant 67. 1754 01:26:20,100 --> 01:26:21,400 Congratulations, David. 1755 01:26:21,400 --> 01:26:24,000 Well... Jim, I gotta tell you, 1756 01:26:24,400 --> 01:26:25,800 I'm the last guy on the planet 1757 01:26:25,900 --> 01:26:28,600 that expected me to go out there right out of the blocks 1758 01:26:28,700 --> 01:26:30,400 and shoot a 67 to lead the open. 1759 01:26:30,600 --> 01:26:31,300 Shut up. 1760 01:26:31,400 --> 01:26:32,100 I've really marveled 1761 01:26:32,200 --> 01:26:34,300 at how you've been able to balance the superb play 1762 01:26:34,400 --> 01:26:37,000 with all the time and energy you give to... 1763 01:26:37,400 --> 01:26:39,700 To so many charities and all of your fans, too. 1764 01:26:40,100 --> 01:26:42,900 Well, you know, I... This game is about... 1765 01:26:43,700 --> 01:26:46,000 Tradition and... and integrity and honor. 1766 01:26:46,400 --> 01:26:49,100 You know, the us open is... is it for us, 1767 01:26:49,300 --> 01:26:51,200 so I'm just gonna go out there tomorrow and, uh, 1768 01:26:51,300 --> 01:26:52,800 try and make some good swings, and... 1769 01:26:53,400 --> 01:26:56,300 Lord willing, I'll put up another good number tomorrow. 1770 01:26:56,600 --> 01:26:58,800 The Antichrist shoots 67. 1771 01:26:59,900 --> 01:27:01,100 Believe that? 1772 01:27:01,200 --> 01:27:04,000 Yeah, the old Antichrist had a hot putter today, boss. 1773 01:27:04,800 --> 01:27:06,200 Thanks a lot, Jim. It's good seeing you. 1774 01:27:06,200 --> 01:27:06,800 Yeah, it's great to see you. 1775 01:27:07,000 --> 01:27:08,600 Hey, Luther. Be well, buddy. 1776 01:27:08,900 --> 01:27:10,600 I'll see you out in the trenches. 1777 01:27:10,700 --> 01:27:12,500 Mr. Simms! Mr. Simms! 1778 01:27:12,700 --> 01:27:14,900 I gotta run right now, but I'll see you later. 1779 01:27:15,900 --> 01:27:18,100 Christ almighty Jesus. 1780 01:27:19,300 --> 01:27:20,700 No, it's either cover or nothing. 1781 01:27:21,100 --> 01:27:22,800 They want you for USA weekend. 1782 01:27:23,000 --> 01:27:24,700 We're telling them it's either the cover or no go. 1783 01:27:24,700 --> 01:27:26,200 Oh, Jesus Christ. 1784 01:27:26,800 --> 01:27:28,300 Excuse me, Mr. Simms. Excuse me. 1785 01:27:28,600 --> 01:27:31,300 Would you mind giving our grandson an autograph? 1786 01:27:31,500 --> 01:27:33,100 Can I please have your autograph, Mr. Simms? 1787 01:27:33,100 --> 01:27:34,600 Can you people not see that I'm busy? 1788 01:27:35,100 --> 01:27:37,300 I'm working here. This is my office. 1789 01:27:37,600 --> 01:27:40,100 Do I come to your office and ask you for your autograph? 1790 01:27:40,400 --> 01:27:42,800 I don't think so. Jesus. 1791 01:27:43,200 --> 01:27:44,600 What an ugly dog. 1792 01:27:44,900 --> 01:27:46,700 It's... it's... it's okay, Joe. 1793 01:27:47,100 --> 01:27:48,700 - It's okay. - Oh. Come on. 1794 01:28:00,600 --> 01:28:01,300 Hey, Gary. 1795 01:28:01,500 --> 01:28:02,300 Hey, nice playing. 1796 01:28:02,500 --> 01:28:03,100 Hey, helluva round, Dave. 1797 01:28:03,200 --> 01:28:04,900 - Oh, thanks a lot. - Great start, Simmsy. 1798 01:28:05,000 --> 01:28:06,300 I got lucky out there. 1799 01:28:09,300 --> 01:28:10,300 Hello, cup. 1800 01:28:12,400 --> 01:28:15,400 I heard that you put a monster number up there. 1801 01:28:16,000 --> 01:28:17,600 Yeah, well, it could have been worse. 1802 01:28:19,000 --> 01:28:20,500 You know, I played in the pro-am 1803 01:28:20,600 --> 01:28:23,000 with some asshole movie star here once. 1804 01:28:24,600 --> 01:28:25,600 Shot an 82. 1805 01:28:27,000 --> 01:28:28,600 Now, how in the world... 1806 01:28:29,200 --> 01:28:31,500 Did a great ball striker like yourself... 1807 01:28:32,400 --> 01:28:33,400 A legend... 1808 01:28:35,400 --> 01:28:37,200 Manage to put up an 837 1809 01:28:38,200 --> 01:28:40,900 well, I missed a 4-foot putt on 18 1810 01:28:41,200 --> 01:28:42,700 for an 82. 1811 01:28:43,200 --> 01:28:44,200 That's how. 1812 01:28:45,200 --> 01:28:48,300 Ain't like playing some muni track in Brownsville, is it, Bucko? 1813 01:28:50,000 --> 01:28:52,700 Does, uh, integrity, tradition, and honor 1814 01:28:53,100 --> 01:28:55,000 include kicking a man when he's down? 1815 01:28:58,800 --> 01:29:00,900 Come on, Molly. This is just guy stuff. 1816 01:29:01,200 --> 01:29:02,900 - Oh. - It's just bar talk. 1817 01:29:03,100 --> 01:29:04,300 No offense. Right, cup? 1818 01:29:04,500 --> 01:29:07,200 You know, this man still has a lot of great golf shots in his system. 1819 01:29:07,300 --> 01:29:08,700 Molly, it's okay. Just go away. 1820 01:29:08,800 --> 01:29:11,600 Just... I don't need any attention right now. 1821 01:29:11,800 --> 01:29:14,300 I'll bet you $100 right now that Roy here 1822 01:29:14,600 --> 01:29:15,700 can hit a ball 1823 01:29:16,000 --> 01:29:18,400 through that door, over the patio, and into the river. 1824 01:29:18,900 --> 01:29:20,900 And, Harold, give me a vodka tonic with a twist. 1825 01:29:21,500 --> 01:29:23,200 Molly, honey... 1826 01:29:23,500 --> 01:29:24,700 Really, this isn't dignified. 1827 01:29:24,900 --> 01:29:26,600 Oh. 1828 01:29:26,700 --> 01:29:28,300 Oh, I'm so sorry. 1829 01:29:29,000 --> 01:29:30,000 Roy. 1830 01:29:30,200 --> 01:29:31,600 I just wanna go back to Texas. 1831 01:29:32,700 --> 01:29:33,700 What about the river? 1832 01:29:34,700 --> 01:29:36,100 The piranha, the immortality? 1833 01:29:36,500 --> 01:29:37,700 All that bullshit? 1834 01:29:38,500 --> 01:29:40,800 You gonna drag your ass home with an 83? 1835 01:29:44,300 --> 01:29:46,000 You know, $200. 1836 01:29:46,300 --> 01:29:47,700 For $200... 1837 01:29:48,200 --> 01:29:50,800 I say that Roy can hit the ball through the damn bar, 1838 01:29:50,900 --> 01:29:52,900 out the patio, into the river, 1839 01:29:53,100 --> 01:29:55,400 and make that pelican right there fly off its post. 1840 01:29:55,600 --> 01:29:56,600 No way. 1841 01:29:56,900 --> 01:29:58,000 From right here. 1842 01:30:01,400 --> 01:30:02,800 God almighty. 1843 01:30:03,300 --> 01:30:04,600 This is ridiculous. 1844 01:30:05,600 --> 01:30:06,600 Hey. 1845 01:30:07,700 --> 01:30:08,700 Hey. 1846 01:30:09,000 --> 01:30:10,500 Hey, you got this shot, pods. 1847 01:30:11,000 --> 01:30:13,400 You can do... It's a hooded 4-iron, man. 1848 01:30:13,600 --> 01:30:14,900 You just... you just turn it over, 1849 01:30:15,100 --> 01:30:17,500 and you start it off low... You can do it. 1850 01:30:17,700 --> 01:30:19,100 He can do this shot. He can do this shot. 1851 01:30:19,200 --> 01:30:20,300 He can do it, and anyway... 1852 01:30:20,300 --> 01:30:21,600 I'm not leaving till one of you men 1853 01:30:21,600 --> 01:30:23,400 start acting in a manly fashion. 1854 01:30:23,600 --> 01:30:25,100 Should we just get this over with? 1855 01:30:33,300 --> 01:30:35,600 One ball, one swing. 1856 01:30:38,100 --> 01:30:40,900 One... pelican. 1857 01:30:41,500 --> 01:30:42,500 From right there. 1858 01:30:44,000 --> 01:30:45,100 You can do it, Roy. 1859 01:30:45,300 --> 01:30:47,200 Come on, you're the man. Shut this guy up. 1860 01:30:57,900 --> 01:30:58,900 One swing? 1861 01:30:59,400 --> 01:31:00,100 One swing. 1862 01:31:00,300 --> 01:31:01,600 I'll give you four-to-one odds. 1863 01:31:01,800 --> 01:31:03,300 Shit, give him 10-to-1. 1864 01:31:06,200 --> 01:31:07,600 Romeo, I'll need a fairway. 1865 01:31:08,000 --> 01:31:08,600 Ladies and gentlemen, - yes. 1866 01:31:08,800 --> 01:31:09,400 Here's what he's got: 1867 01:31:09,600 --> 01:31:11,400 He's got 30 yards of bar and grill. 1868 01:31:11,600 --> 01:31:13,200 Then he's got to go through the French doors, 1869 01:31:13,200 --> 01:31:16,200 over the umbrellas, and then carry 30 yards of river. 1870 01:31:16,400 --> 01:31:18,600 He's got to try to pop that pelican right off its perch. 1871 01:31:18,800 --> 01:31:20,500 Kind of a thin lie, wouldn't you say? 1872 01:31:20,700 --> 01:31:23,000 Beats all that deep-shit rough you were in all day. 1873 01:31:23,200 --> 01:31:25,300 Fore! Fore in the bar! Come on, clear it away! 1874 01:31:25,300 --> 01:31:27,000 Pelican's on the other side. 1875 01:31:27,000 --> 01:31:28,600 Man, what a tough shot. 1876 01:31:28,900 --> 01:31:30,100 I betcha he's gotta be thinking 1877 01:31:30,300 --> 01:31:32,100 about that brutal, ego-sapping, 1878 01:31:32,300 --> 01:31:33,400 manhood-robbing... 1879 01:31:33,900 --> 01:31:36,000 83 he buried himself underneath today. 1880 01:31:36,100 --> 01:31:39,000 That's an avalanche of strokes, a mudslide. 1881 01:31:39,100 --> 01:31:40,600 Romeo, you wanna get control of that guy? 1882 01:31:40,700 --> 01:31:42,500 Will you shut up? Get down. 1883 01:31:54,200 --> 01:31:56,200 Yes! Yes! 1884 01:31:56,400 --> 01:31:57,900 Did you see that shot?! 1885 01:31:58,100 --> 01:31:59,800 Oh, my god! 1886 01:32:05,200 --> 01:32:06,300 That ought to cover it. 1887 01:32:06,800 --> 01:32:07,800 Yeah. 1888 01:32:08,500 --> 01:32:09,500 You know... 1889 01:32:10,800 --> 01:32:12,100 You're all fucking nuts. 1890 01:32:13,200 --> 01:32:14,200 Yeah. 1891 01:32:14,900 --> 01:32:15,900 Yeah. 1892 01:32:22,600 --> 01:32:24,600 You really... look good. 1893 01:32:27,600 --> 01:32:28,600 Oh. 1894 01:32:29,900 --> 01:32:31,800 ♪ put your coffees down ♪ 1895 01:32:32,500 --> 01:32:34,300 ♪ you better step around ♪ 1896 01:32:34,900 --> 01:32:37,900 ♪ you're the only one to get this done ♪ 1897 01:32:39,900 --> 01:32:41,800 ♪ close and lock the door ♪ 1898 01:32:42,300 --> 01:32:44,300 ♪ duck down to the floor j; 1899 01:32:44,900 --> 01:32:47,200 ♪ forget the phone until you see the sun ♪ 1900 01:32:49,400 --> 01:32:51,900 ♪ hey, it's all right ♪ 1901 01:32:52,000 --> 01:32:54,200 ♪ 'cause you know I'll make this fun ♪ 1902 01:32:54,500 --> 01:32:56,800 ♪ oh, when we see the morning light » 1903 01:32:57,000 --> 01:32:59,400 ♪ we'll be right back where we started from ♪ 1904 01:32:59,600 --> 01:33:01,300 ♪ 'cause this could take all night > 1905 01:33:01,500 --> 01:33:02,800 I kind of shanked that, huh? 1906 01:33:03,300 --> 01:33:04,600 No, no. 1907 01:33:05,500 --> 01:33:07,300 - Hey, come on, you guys. - = 1908 01:33:07,400 --> 01:33:08,400 Romeo! 1909 01:33:08,500 --> 01:33:09,700 This is no time for a marathon! 1910 01:33:10,900 --> 01:33:12,800 It's wet out here. Damn. 1911 01:33:13,200 --> 01:33:14,000 Tempo is everything. 1912 01:33:14,200 --> 01:33:15,200 Mmm. 1913 01:33:17,900 --> 01:33:19,100 Perfection is... 1914 01:33:19,400 --> 01:33:21,100 Unattainable. = unattainable. 1915 01:33:23,100 --> 01:33:24,200 You know, somebody said... 1916 01:33:25,200 --> 01:33:26,700 Golf and sex are the only two things 1917 01:33:26,900 --> 01:33:28,800 you don't have to be good at to enjoy. 1918 01:33:30,100 --> 01:33:31,100 Really? 1919 01:33:32,800 --> 01:33:33,900 Can I have a mulligan? 1920 01:33:34,100 --> 01:33:34,900 A what? 1921 01:33:35,000 --> 01:33:36,000 A mulligan. 1922 01:33:36,200 --> 01:33:37,400 What's a mulligan? 1923 01:33:38,800 --> 01:33:39,300 Oh. 1924 01:33:39,500 --> 01:33:41,800 Just hold still. Don't move. 1925 01:33:42,000 --> 01:33:42,500 Oh. 1926 01:33:42,700 --> 01:33:44,700 And I'll show you. =- mmm. 1927 01:33:44,800 --> 01:33:46,500 In fact, why don't you get on top, 1928 01:33:46,700 --> 01:33:47,700 and I'll show you? 1929 01:33:47,700 --> 01:33:49,000 Mmm. Tee it up. 1930 01:33:49,900 --> 01:33:51,500 Come on, Roy! 1931 01:33:52,700 --> 01:33:53,700 Damn! 1932 01:33:54,800 --> 01:33:58,600 ♪ baby, this could take all night > 1933 01:34:00,100 --> 01:34:01,200 j; Yeah ♪ 1934 01:34:02,200 --> 01:34:06,000 jj 1935 01:34:12,900 --> 01:34:14,100 Welcome, everyone. 1936 01:34:14,100 --> 01:34:15,600 Jim Nantz with Ken venturi. 1937 01:34:15,600 --> 01:34:17,300 The sun is struggling to come out, 1938 01:34:17,500 --> 01:34:18,700 the course is drying up, 1939 01:34:18,800 --> 01:34:20,200 and in case you're just joining us, 1940 01:34:20,200 --> 01:34:22,600 David Simms is tied for the lead in the clubhouse 1941 01:34:22,700 --> 01:34:24,700 at five under par with Peter Jacobsen. 1942 01:34:24,900 --> 01:34:26,600 But the real story today, Kenny, 1943 01:34:26,800 --> 01:34:29,300 involves a driving-range pro from Texas 1944 01:34:29,500 --> 01:34:32,500 who shot an opening-round 83 yesterday, 1945 01:34:32,900 --> 01:34:35,400 but now is making a run at us open history. 1946 01:34:35,600 --> 01:34:38,300 The single-round record in open history is in jeopardy 1947 01:34:38,500 --> 01:34:39,800 because of Roy "tin cup"... 1948 01:34:40,000 --> 01:34:41,900 Another driving-range pro, that's all we needed. 1949 01:34:42,000 --> 01:34:43,500 - More obscure guys. - Unbelievable story. 1950 01:34:43,600 --> 01:34:45,200 Yes, heroes is what I need. 1951 01:34:45,600 --> 01:34:47,200 Not obscure driving-range pros. 1952 01:34:47,900 --> 01:34:49,500 Okay, Ben, we're back at 16. 1953 01:34:49,900 --> 01:34:50,600 Quickly. 1954 01:34:50,800 --> 01:34:51,900 Now, this putt, uh, 1955 01:34:51,900 --> 01:34:53,400 he's studied it from every angle, 1956 01:34:53,600 --> 01:34:54,900 and I'm sure he knows it's... 1957 01:34:55,000 --> 01:34:58,600 It... he's just got to be firm on the left-hand edge with this putt. 1958 01:34:58,800 --> 01:35:00,200 Thumbnails on these clowns. 1959 01:35:00,400 --> 01:35:02,000 I have no idea where he came from, 1960 01:35:02,700 --> 01:35:05,200 but here he is going 10 under if he makes it. 1961 01:35:05,300 --> 01:35:06,400 He's getting ready to putt. 1962 01:35:09,100 --> 01:35:09,700 Look at that. 1963 01:35:09,900 --> 01:35:11,300 Smooth as silk. 1964 01:35:11,500 --> 01:35:13,100 Made it! 1965 01:35:13,500 --> 01:35:16,100 10 under par for McAvoy. 1966 01:35:16,600 --> 01:35:18,000 Man alive! 1967 01:35:18,300 --> 01:35:21,700 This is, uh... The stuff of, uh, legend, I would say. 1968 01:35:25,000 --> 01:35:27,300 - Who's McAvoy? - McAvoy? 1969 01:35:27,500 --> 01:35:29,300 John, you ever heard of this McAvoy guy? 1970 01:35:29,900 --> 01:35:32,700 Roy McAvoy after a par at 17, 1971 01:35:32,900 --> 01:35:34,700 an eagle to shoot 60, 1972 01:35:35,000 --> 01:35:36,700 although no one has knocked it on the green 1973 01:35:36,800 --> 01:35:38,100 in 2 here today. 1974 01:35:38,300 --> 01:35:40,600 This is not a shot you really wanna get aggressive with. 1975 01:35:40,700 --> 01:35:41,400 You gotta be conservative. 1976 01:35:41,600 --> 01:35:42,800 You gotta think this shot out. 1977 01:35:42,900 --> 01:35:44,000 He's in great position. 1978 01:35:44,200 --> 01:35:45,800 Well, it's a 3-shot par 5. 1979 01:35:46,000 --> 01:35:48,000 Especially today, a little wind in the face. 1980 01:35:48,400 --> 01:35:50,500 John Daly, in fact, ended up in the water 1981 01:35:50,700 --> 01:35:52,300 trying to go for this green in 2. 1982 01:35:52,800 --> 01:35:54,700 237, man, to carry that water. 1983 01:35:55,100 --> 01:35:58,500 Jj 1984 01:35:59,900 --> 01:36:00,900 237, man. 1985 01:36:09,200 --> 01:36:10,200 3-wood. 1986 01:36:18,300 --> 01:36:19,000 Hit the hell out of it. 1987 01:36:19,200 --> 01:36:20,300 You know, Jimmy, his adrenaline may have 1988 01:36:20,400 --> 01:36:21,200 gotten the better of him. 1989 01:36:21,300 --> 01:36:23,100 If he lays up, he takes bogey out of play. 1990 01:36:23,300 --> 01:36:26,400 He goes for the green, he brings six in, he brings seven in. 1991 01:36:26,700 --> 01:36:28,700 But he's gotta remember, he's in contention. 1992 01:36:28,800 --> 01:36:31,600 He has a chance to win the us open. He's gotta play smart. 1993 01:36:32,500 --> 01:36:33,500 Wow. 1994 01:36:34,900 --> 01:36:35,900 Nope. 1995 01:36:41,000 --> 01:36:42,500 Ohh! 1996 01:36:43,600 --> 01:36:45,700 Jimmy, he just didn't have enough club. 1997 01:36:46,800 --> 01:36:47,800 Well, what the hell. 1998 01:36:48,500 --> 01:36:50,100 You ride her till she bucks you... 1999 01:36:50,900 --> 01:36:52,200 Or you don't ride at all. 2000 01:36:52,500 --> 01:36:55,400 If he can still knock a wedge close and make par, 2001 01:36:55,800 --> 01:36:58,600 it would conclude one of the most remarkable turnarounds 2002 01:36:58,800 --> 01:36:59,900 in tournament history. 2003 01:37:00,200 --> 01:37:02,100 He's got about 85 yards from here, Jim, 2004 01:37:02,100 --> 01:37:04,100 and the drop zone is short of the water. 2005 01:37:04,500 --> 01:37:06,300 And he'll need to get this on the upper level 2006 01:37:06,500 --> 01:37:07,900 of this multi-terraced green. 2007 01:37:13,100 --> 01:37:15,000 Now, that's a good solid shot 2008 01:37:15,100 --> 01:37:18,000 leaving him about 12 feet away for par, 2009 01:37:18,200 --> 01:37:22,800 a par and 62, the all-time open round record. 2010 01:37:35,100 --> 01:37:36,100 Good stroke. 2011 01:37:36,400 --> 01:37:37,400 He's got it. 2012 01:37:37,900 --> 01:37:40,300 Unbelievable! Roy McAvoy has done it! 2013 01:37:40,500 --> 01:37:42,600 You have just seen the greatest round 2014 01:37:42,700 --> 01:37:44,800 in United States open history. 2015 01:37:45,200 --> 01:37:46,400 62. 2016 01:37:47,700 --> 01:37:50,100 The all-time lowest round in the majors 2017 01:37:50,200 --> 01:37:52,400 doesn't belong to a Jack Nicklaus 2018 01:37:52,500 --> 01:37:55,500 or an Arnold Palmer, Nelson, hogan, or Snead. 2019 01:37:55,700 --> 01:37:58,800 It has been shot by the most improbable artist of all. 2020 01:37:59,100 --> 01:38:01,200 Roy McAvoy has his signature 2021 01:38:01,400 --> 01:38:03,900 on golf's all-time masterpiece round. 2022 01:38:11,300 --> 01:38:12,900 You know, I got some money from the pelican bet. 2023 01:38:12,900 --> 01:38:14,700 Why don't we go somewhere fancy and celebrate, 2024 01:38:14,900 --> 01:38:16,000 get ready for the final round? 2025 01:38:16,000 --> 01:38:17,900 There's nothing to celebrate. 2026 01:38:18,100 --> 01:38:19,900 Besides, these are my people, right? 2027 01:38:20,100 --> 01:38:21,100 That's right. 2028 01:38:21,600 --> 01:38:22,900 I'm a waffle house guy. 2029 01:38:23,000 --> 01:38:24,400 Gotta stay in touch with that. 2030 01:38:25,300 --> 01:38:26,600 Plus, he needs his carbohydrates. 2031 01:38:26,700 --> 01:38:27,200 Yeah. 2032 01:38:27,400 --> 01:38:29,000 Plus, if the boys in Salome were in town, 2033 01:38:29,100 --> 01:38:30,500 this is where they'd be. 2034 01:38:30,700 --> 01:38:31,800 Okay. All right. 2035 01:38:32,000 --> 01:38:33,800 Yay! The legend. 2036 01:38:34,300 --> 01:38:36,500 Goddamn, we've been on a bus for 2 days, 2037 01:38:36,700 --> 01:38:38,000 riding around, riding around. 2038 01:38:38,300 --> 01:38:39,900 Oh, god, it's so good to see you. 2039 01:38:40,100 --> 01:38:41,200 It's so good to see you. 2040 01:38:41,300 --> 01:38:42,600 I didn't know you were gonna come. 2041 01:38:42,600 --> 01:38:43,600 Sweet 62! 2042 01:38:44,100 --> 01:38:45,900 - Hey, hey. - Put the tables together. 2043 01:38:46,100 --> 01:38:47,200 Put 'em together. 2044 01:38:47,500 --> 01:38:49,000 Put this up and rest your rump. 2045 01:38:49,200 --> 01:38:51,000 - Does this feel like home? - Yeah. 2046 01:38:51,200 --> 01:38:54,100 We just want you to know that we are with you all the way. 2047 01:38:54,500 --> 01:38:56,800 Doreen, uh, meet Dr. Griswold. 2048 01:38:57,000 --> 01:38:58,600 - Uh, this is Molly. - Hi. 2049 01:38:59,400 --> 01:39:00,600 She's, uh, my shrink. 2050 01:39:00,700 --> 01:39:02,900 - Hi. - Well, ex-shrink, um... 2051 01:39:03,000 --> 01:39:05,500 We're sleeping together now, so I can't be his therapist. 2052 01:39:06,300 --> 01:39:07,300 Knew it. Thanks. 2053 01:39:07,700 --> 01:39:08,700 Knew what? 2054 01:39:09,000 --> 01:39:10,100 Oh, nothing. 2055 01:39:10,200 --> 01:39:11,200 Good luck. 2056 01:39:12,100 --> 01:39:13,300 You know what, guys? 2057 01:39:13,400 --> 01:39:15,200 I have got a little extra cash. 2058 01:39:15,400 --> 01:39:19,000 Why don't we all just go somewhere a little fancy and celebrate? 2059 01:39:19,100 --> 01:39:20,100 - Exactly. - Why? 2060 01:39:20,600 --> 01:39:21,800 Well, in honor of, you know... 2061 01:39:21,900 --> 01:39:22,700 This is the waffle house, Doreen. 2062 01:39:22,900 --> 01:39:24,400 Well, I know, and I love the waffle... 2063 01:39:24,600 --> 01:39:27,800 I've been dreaming about waffles for... 1,800 miles. 2064 01:39:28,000 --> 01:39:29,000 Yeah, me, too. 2065 01:39:29,000 --> 01:39:30,900 You know, here's a waffle house exactly like this 2066 01:39:31,000 --> 01:39:32,100 in Odessa, Texas. = yeah. 2067 01:39:32,300 --> 01:39:34,000 Odessa? It's in midland, ain't it? 2068 01:39:34,200 --> 01:39:35,400 No, it's in Odessa. 2069 01:39:35,600 --> 01:39:38,500 Honey, it's in Odessa. I'm from Odessa, and it's in Odessa. 2070 01:39:38,600 --> 01:39:40,800 I was born there, honey, and that's where it is. 2071 01:39:41,000 --> 01:39:42,000 To the man. 2072 01:39:42,200 --> 01:39:42,900 To the cup! 2073 01:39:43,100 --> 01:39:44,600 - To the cup! - To the cup! 2074 01:39:44,800 --> 01:39:45,900 You didn't have to do that. 2075 01:39:47,300 --> 01:39:49,200 You look particularly lovely tonight, Doreen. 2076 01:39:49,600 --> 01:39:51,100 Oh, well, thank you. 2077 01:39:52,700 --> 01:39:53,900 I don't know if anybody ever told you, 2078 01:39:54,000 --> 01:39:55,400 but you're really a helluva dancer. 2079 01:39:56,900 --> 01:39:58,200 - Really? - Mm-hmm. 2080 01:39:58,600 --> 01:39:59,700 Yeah, but they had one there. 2081 01:39:59,900 --> 01:40:01,600 That's all I'm saying. They had one there. 2082 01:40:01,800 --> 01:40:03,700 Wait, wait. = it was... Odessa. 2083 01:40:03,900 --> 01:40:05,200 That's not what I was talking about, 2084 01:40:05,300 --> 01:40:06,700 and you know the place that we stopped? 2085 01:40:06,700 --> 01:40:08,900 Listen, there is one easy way to figure this out. 2086 01:40:09,500 --> 01:40:10,500 You ever tango? 2087 01:40:11,100 --> 01:40:12,100 - Tango? - Mm-hmm. 2088 01:40:12,400 --> 01:40:13,400 Uh, no. 2089 01:40:14,800 --> 01:40:15,800 Do you? 2090 01:40:16,400 --> 01:40:17,500 Well, you know... 2091 01:40:19,200 --> 01:40:21,100 Romeo, you dance? 2092 01:40:22,300 --> 01:40:23,300 It doesn't matter! 2093 01:40:24,900 --> 01:40:26,400 It doesn't get much better than this. 2094 01:40:31,700 --> 01:40:33,900 Well, this extraordinary Roy McAvoy, 2095 01:40:34,100 --> 01:40:35,400 he just won't go away, 2096 01:40:35,600 --> 01:40:38,200 this, uh, humble driving-range pro 2097 01:40:38,400 --> 01:40:40,900 from... Salome, wherever that is. 2098 01:40:41,000 --> 01:40:42,000 Little town, west Texas. 2099 01:40:42,300 --> 01:40:43,500 It hasn't been discovered yet. 2100 01:40:43,700 --> 01:40:45,000 Over to 18, guys, quickly. 2101 01:40:45,200 --> 01:40:47,800 Kenny, this is John cook at the par 518th, 2102 01:40:47,900 --> 01:40:49,800 no stranger to championship play. 2103 01:40:49,900 --> 01:40:51,600 He's going to lay up with a 7-iron. 2104 01:40:53,500 --> 01:40:55,600 Meanwhile, here's Roy McAvoy. 2105 01:40:56,100 --> 01:40:57,200 He has the same shot 2106 01:40:57,300 --> 01:40:58,900 he knocked in the water yesterday, Jimmy. 2107 01:40:59,100 --> 01:41:01,900 The thing to do right now is tune out the gallery saying, "go for it." 2108 01:41:02,200 --> 01:41:03,600 He's now back in contention, 2109 01:41:03,900 --> 01:41:05,700 but he must continue to play smart. 2110 01:41:05,900 --> 01:41:06,900 Gimme a 3-wood. 2111 01:41:11,700 --> 01:41:13,500 Well, he's... He's pulled the 3-wood, 2112 01:41:13,500 --> 01:41:15,200 and he continues to play this tournament 2113 01:41:15,400 --> 01:41:16,400 without an ounce of fear. 2114 01:41:16,500 --> 01:41:19,000 That is just inexperience, just pure and simple. 2115 01:41:19,100 --> 01:41:20,700 This is for venturi up there in the booth 2116 01:41:20,900 --> 01:41:22,000 thinking I should lay up. 2117 01:41:22,800 --> 01:41:24,200 Yeah, what does he know? 2118 01:41:24,400 --> 01:41:26,300 He only won this tournament before you were born. 2119 01:41:32,800 --> 01:41:33,600 Caught it a little bit high, 2120 01:41:33,800 --> 01:41:34,500 a little breeze in his face. 2121 01:41:34,700 --> 01:41:36,900 That's... that's gotta go, gotta go. 2122 01:41:38,400 --> 01:41:39,500 He's done it again. 2123 01:41:39,500 --> 01:41:40,100 No, not again. 2124 01:41:40,300 --> 01:41:41,900 He has found the water 2125 01:41:42,100 --> 01:41:44,400 for the third straight day. 2126 01:41:44,600 --> 01:41:46,100 What was he thinking about? 2127 01:41:46,500 --> 01:41:47,500 Gimme another ball. 2128 01:41:48,600 --> 01:41:49,600 Roy. 2129 01:41:50,200 --> 01:41:50,900 What? 2130 01:41:51,000 --> 01:41:52,200 It's a water hazard. 2131 01:41:52,900 --> 01:41:54,200 You go up there and take a drop, 2132 01:41:54,400 --> 01:41:56,300 try to save par, just like you did yesterday. 2133 01:41:57,600 --> 01:41:58,600 You're right. 2134 01:41:59,700 --> 01:42:00,900 The hell was I thinking? 2135 01:42:02,100 --> 01:42:04,400 He's tied for the lead, this Roy McAvoy, 2136 01:42:04,600 --> 01:42:06,500 this tin cup, this empty cup, 2137 01:42:06,700 --> 01:42:08,400 this air brain out of nowhere. 2138 01:42:08,600 --> 01:42:09,200 West Texas. 2139 01:42:09,300 --> 01:42:12,100 And, uh, I... yeah, west... Thank... thank you for west Texas. 2140 01:42:12,300 --> 01:42:15,000 You, uh, went for the green on 18 today. 2141 01:42:15,100 --> 01:42:16,900 I'm just wondering if you think that cost you. 2142 01:42:17,000 --> 01:42:18,400 I saved par, didn't 1? 2143 01:42:19,200 --> 01:42:20,300 - Well... - Didn't I? 2144 01:42:20,500 --> 01:42:22,400 I'm just trying to understand what you're thinking. 2145 01:42:22,400 --> 01:42:25,100 You had the same shot yesterday on 18 without a headwind... 2146 01:42:25,300 --> 01:42:27,000 You don't think I can knock it on from there? 2147 01:42:27,200 --> 01:42:28,800 Let's just say it's a low-percentage shot. 2148 01:42:28,900 --> 01:42:31,600 Well, so am I. I mean, look at me, all right? 2149 01:42:31,700 --> 01:42:32,300 Look what I'm wearing. 2150 01:42:32,400 --> 01:42:35,400 I mean, I'm playing for Rio Grande short-haul trucking, 2151 01:42:35,600 --> 01:42:38,100 brink's and brown's sanitation, uh... 2152 01:42:39,200 --> 01:42:40,800 First state bank of Salome, 2153 01:42:41,300 --> 01:42:42,700 Woody's smokehouse. You think a... 2154 01:42:44,200 --> 01:42:47,300 You think a guy like me bothers to worry about the percentages? 2155 01:43:09,800 --> 01:43:11,800 Are you nervous about tomorrow, Roy? 2156 01:43:19,700 --> 01:43:21,500 It won't always be like this, you know. 2157 01:43:22,300 --> 01:43:23,300 What? 2158 01:43:24,600 --> 01:43:27,100 With me, surrounded by all these guys snorin', 2159 01:43:27,500 --> 01:43:29,800 stripper ex-girlfriend layin' across from us. 2160 01:43:32,800 --> 01:43:34,800 My caddy sleepin' next to her. 2161 01:43:36,800 --> 01:43:38,500 It won't always be like this. 2162 01:43:39,700 --> 01:43:41,200 Yes, it will, Roy. 2163 01:43:42,100 --> 01:43:43,100 It will. 2164 01:44:08,800 --> 01:44:10,200 Dollar bills. 2165 01:44:13,800 --> 01:44:18,000 Jj 2166 01:44:18,100 --> 01:44:19,500 Dollar bills. 2167 01:44:27,200 --> 01:44:28,300 Dollar bills. 2168 01:44:31,600 --> 01:44:38,300 Jj 2169 01:44:41,500 --> 01:44:43,700 First up, in the final pairing, 2170 01:44:43,800 --> 01:44:47,400 from Salome, Texas, Roy McAvoy. 2171 01:44:48,300 --> 01:44:49,300 Fairways and Greens, Dave, 2172 01:44:49,500 --> 01:44:52,200 and don't forget to wave as I blow by. 2173 01:44:52,600 --> 01:44:54,300 You mean blow up, don't ya, sport? 2174 01:44:54,800 --> 01:44:55,800 You always do. 2175 01:44:56,700 --> 01:44:59,800 Jj 2176 01:45:09,400 --> 01:45:14,100 Jj 2177 01:45:20,400 --> 01:45:22,200 Awww... 2178 01:45:26,600 --> 01:45:27,300 Son of a... 2179 01:45:27,500 --> 01:45:29,600 Playing out of Houston, Texas, 2180 01:45:30,000 --> 01:45:31,800 David Simms. 2181 01:45:36,600 --> 01:45:38,100 It's okay. I know exactly where you are. 2182 01:45:38,500 --> 01:45:39,900 Don't worry. You're in great shape. 2183 01:45:41,400 --> 01:45:45,600 Jj 2184 01:45:58,200 --> 01:45:59,300 What kind of lie we got, boss? 2185 01:45:59,300 --> 01:46:00,600 Oh, shit. It's buried. 2186 01:46:00,800 --> 01:46:01,800 Uh-oh. 2187 01:46:03,500 --> 01:46:05,300 All right. Be careful. Don't... don't touch it. 2188 01:46:05,300 --> 01:46:06,900 I know the rules, Romeo. 2189 01:46:10,900 --> 01:46:11,900 Which way ya gonna go? 2190 01:46:12,500 --> 01:46:13,700 Go right through there. 2191 01:46:14,100 --> 01:46:15,100 Go for it. 2192 01:46:19,400 --> 01:46:20,600 No! God! 2193 01:46:20,900 --> 01:46:22,100 Don't worry about it. It was my fault. 2194 01:46:22,100 --> 01:46:23,500 I gave you the wrong club. Okay? You'll be fine. 2195 01:46:23,600 --> 01:46:24,200 You put a good move on the ball. 2196 01:46:24,400 --> 01:46:25,800 - Shut up. - Really, now, don't worry about it. 2197 01:46:25,800 --> 01:46:27,200 Here... you did fine. Give me the club. 2198 01:46:27,200 --> 01:46:28,300 Thank you very much, Jim. 2199 01:46:28,300 --> 01:46:30,000 We've just heard that Roy McAvoy 2200 01:46:30,100 --> 01:46:34,200 has taken a disastrous double bogey to open his final round here. 2201 01:46:34,700 --> 01:46:37,100 Ah, double back there, Roy. 2202 01:46:37,400 --> 01:46:38,900 Just keep makin' pars, asshole. 2203 01:46:39,100 --> 01:46:41,600 I'll take 18 of 'em, all day long. 2204 01:46:41,800 --> 01:46:43,400 Do it, and I'll own ya. 2205 01:46:43,500 --> 01:46:46,900 Jj 2206 01:46:56,200 --> 01:46:58,100 Jj 2207 01:47:09,400 --> 01:47:11,600 Jj 2208 01:47:11,800 --> 01:47:12,800 Fore! 2209 01:47:18,100 --> 01:47:21,500 Roy McAvoy's 2nd shot at the 2nd hole 2210 01:47:21,700 --> 01:47:23,500 has gone deep into the woods. 2211 01:47:24,200 --> 01:47:25,900 For a report on his plight, 2212 01:47:26,000 --> 01:47:27,500 let's go down to Gary McCord, 2213 01:47:27,700 --> 01:47:31,500 who has spent most of his life in the woods and in darkness. Gary? 2214 01:47:32,000 --> 01:47:33,500 Ben, he's in jail here. 2215 01:47:33,700 --> 01:47:35,100 No chance for parole. 2216 01:47:35,200 --> 01:47:36,700 In fact, the only thing he's got... 2217 01:47:37,300 --> 01:47:39,000 He's got to hit the ball back in the fairway, 2218 01:47:39,200 --> 01:47:40,400 try to pitch ball on the green, 2219 01:47:40,400 --> 01:47:41,600 and get up and down for his par. 2220 01:47:41,700 --> 01:47:43,300 He's got no chance to hit it on the green. 2221 01:47:45,000 --> 01:47:47,200 50 bucks says I knock it on from here with a 7-iron. 2222 01:47:47,400 --> 01:47:48,300 On the green? 2223 01:47:48,400 --> 01:47:49,400 Right on the green. 2224 01:47:49,800 --> 01:47:50,800 You got it. 2225 01:47:51,000 --> 01:47:53,000 Marsha, you want to move these people back right here? 2226 01:47:53,000 --> 01:47:54,000 I'm goin' right there. 2227 01:47:58,000 --> 01:47:59,300 Mccord, what you got? 2228 01:47:59,600 --> 01:48:00,800 What's he... what's he doing? 2229 01:48:02,200 --> 01:48:04,700 Ben, I think he's gonna try the old ricochet off the port-a-let 2230 01:48:04,900 --> 01:48:05,900 with a hooded 7-iron. 2231 01:48:06,500 --> 01:48:08,100 He is! He's gonna hit it right off the shitter! 2232 01:48:08,200 --> 01:48:10,400 I cannot believe he's about to hit this shot. 2233 01:48:10,500 --> 01:48:13,000 Dave, vt 1, record, record. Record this shot. 2234 01:48:13,500 --> 01:48:14,500 Hey! 2235 01:48:23,900 --> 01:48:28,400 Roy McAvoy has banked his 3rd shot at the 2nd hole 2236 01:48:28,600 --> 01:48:31,200 between the trees, off a water closet... 2237 01:48:31,500 --> 01:48:33,400 Toilet or loo, as you might call it... 2238 01:48:33,600 --> 01:48:36,400 And got it on the green, somehow, in three. 2239 01:48:36,600 --> 01:48:37,400 May be the shot, though, 2240 01:48:37,600 --> 01:48:40,100 that does get him right back on track here in this final round. 2241 01:48:40,300 --> 01:48:41,900 It could erase that double bogey at one. 2242 01:48:42,000 --> 01:48:44,000 It may be the best thing that ever happened to him. 2243 01:49:14,300 --> 01:49:16,200 Oh, that was great. 2244 01:49:16,600 --> 01:49:18,800 I didn't know there was a little mirror thing in here. 2245 01:49:19,000 --> 01:49:20,000 Isn't this cute? 2246 01:49:31,900 --> 01:49:33,700 Here. Let me just look at my... 2247 01:49:35,700 --> 01:49:39,200 Jj 2248 01:50:18,900 --> 01:50:21,900 Looks pretty level. Just roll it in like you know what you're doin'. 2249 01:50:24,900 --> 01:50:25,900 Hit it close, sport. 2250 01:50:26,800 --> 01:50:30,000 Jj 2251 01:50:48,600 --> 01:50:50,400 Yes! Yes! Yaah! 2252 01:51:02,700 --> 01:51:04,900 Doreen, how did he get the name "tin cup"? 2253 01:51:05,500 --> 01:51:08,100 Oh, he was the catcher on the high school baseball team. 2254 01:51:08,800 --> 01:51:10,600 The star pitcher had a big league curve. 2255 01:51:10,800 --> 01:51:13,300 Not all his pitches hit Roy in the mitt. Ouch. 2256 01:51:14,300 --> 01:51:17,500 Team thought "tin cup” was a whole lot better than "clank." 2257 01:51:19,300 --> 01:51:20,300 Clank... 2258 01:51:25,300 --> 01:51:27,000 = fuck. 2259 01:51:34,200 --> 01:51:36,700 Jj 2260 01:51:47,700 --> 01:51:49,400 Molly, can I ask you a question? 2261 01:51:49,800 --> 01:51:50,800 Sure. 2262 01:51:51,100 --> 01:51:53,000 Have you ever had a Latin lover? 2263 01:51:53,700 --> 01:51:55,500 Where does he get his name from 2264 01:51:55,600 --> 01:51:57,200 is what I wanna know. 2265 01:51:59,600 --> 01:52:03,500 Why did you wait so long to leave that Simms character? 2266 01:52:03,900 --> 01:52:06,100 Well, it takes a little while to realize 2267 01:52:06,300 --> 01:52:07,700 that prince charming might be wearing 2268 01:52:07,700 --> 01:52:08,800 a beer-stained undershirt 2269 01:52:09,000 --> 01:52:10,600 with a sausage hangin' out of his mouth, 2270 01:52:10,700 --> 01:52:14,500 makin' $7.00 an hour in some armadillo-infested driving range. 2271 01:52:14,700 --> 01:52:16,900 You're not one of these women who tries to fix men, I hope. 2272 01:52:16,900 --> 01:52:19,100 I mean, men cannot be fixed and especially him. 2273 01:52:19,300 --> 01:52:21,300 Yeah. Well, I've been pathetically slow learning that lesson. 2274 01:52:21,400 --> 01:52:23,200 Molly. Hey. 2275 01:52:23,500 --> 01:52:25,100 - Hi. How are ya? - How are you? 2276 01:52:25,100 --> 01:52:27,300 Good. Hey, I could use a little help, I think. 2277 01:52:27,500 --> 01:52:28,900 You know, I've seen what you've done with McAvoy 2278 01:52:29,000 --> 01:52:30,200 and all that psychological stuff. 2279 01:52:30,400 --> 01:52:31,600 I think it could come in pretty handy. 2280 01:52:31,700 --> 01:52:33,200 Well, hey! Let me give you my card. 2281 01:52:33,400 --> 01:52:34,800 - Sure. - Yeah, that'd be great. 2282 01:52:35,300 --> 01:52:37,400 Super. If, uh, actually, if you got a few more of these, 2283 01:52:37,400 --> 01:52:39,700 there's a bunch of guys in the locker room could use your help as well, I'm sure. 2284 01:52:39,700 --> 01:52:40,700 You know what? Take 'em all. 2285 01:52:40,800 --> 01:52:41,900 Thanks. This is Doreen. 2286 01:52:42,100 --> 01:52:42,900 - Hi. I'm Doreen. - Hi, Doreen. How are you? 2287 01:52:43,100 --> 01:52:45,500 And, you know, my number's right there. Just call me anytime. 2288 01:52:45,600 --> 01:52:46,300 I do counsel couples, 2289 01:52:46,500 --> 01:52:48,500 so if you want to bring your caddy, that'd be just fine. 2290 01:52:48,500 --> 01:52:50,100 Yeah, I'll think about it, and I'll give you a call. 2291 01:52:50,100 --> 01:52:51,100 - Okay. - Great, thanks. 2292 01:52:51,300 --> 01:52:52,600 - Bye. Nice meetin' you. - See ya. 2293 01:52:53,600 --> 01:52:54,600 Cheers. 2294 01:52:54,700 --> 01:52:55,700 Oh. Cheers. 2295 01:53:16,700 --> 01:53:18,000 Yes! Ho! 2296 01:53:18,100 --> 01:53:20,000 Boom. 2297 01:53:20,900 --> 01:53:23,600 That puts Jacobsen into a tie at seven, guys, 2298 01:53:23,800 --> 01:53:26,200 and that, uh, tin cup guy is 1 shot back. 2299 01:53:26,400 --> 01:53:27,600 Let's keep abreast of that. 2300 01:53:28,500 --> 01:53:31,700 That birdie by Peter Jacobsen forged a tie now for the lead 2301 01:53:31,900 --> 01:53:33,600 at seven under with David Simms. 2302 01:53:33,900 --> 01:53:36,100 And Roy McAvoy just won't go away. 2303 01:53:36,300 --> 01:53:39,100 He's only one shot back at six under par. 2304 01:53:56,200 --> 01:53:57,800 Man, he's throwin' darts back there. 2305 01:53:58,200 --> 01:54:00,300 If we don't make some birdies, we're playin' for 2nd. 2306 01:54:00,700 --> 01:54:02,700 McAvoy? You believe he's still hangin' around? 2307 01:54:02,900 --> 01:54:04,500 It's hard to believe that a guy named tin cup 2308 01:54:04,600 --> 01:54:06,300 might have his name beneath mine on the trophy. 2309 01:54:06,300 --> 01:54:09,600 So it's come down to the 72nd hole of this great championship, 2310 01:54:09,800 --> 01:54:14,000 and three men, all battling to be crowned the next open champion. 2311 01:54:14,100 --> 01:54:17,400 Peter Jacobsen is in the fairway at 18 at eight under par, 2312 01:54:17,600 --> 01:54:21,000 tied for the lead with Roy McAvoy, who's on the 18th tee. 2313 01:54:21,200 --> 01:54:23,700 And David Simms is back there trailing by one. 2314 01:54:41,100 --> 01:54:42,200 Jacobsen"s layin' up. 2315 01:54:42,400 --> 01:54:43,500 Yeah, he took out an iron. 2316 01:54:43,700 --> 01:54:44,900 Jacobsen's gonna lay up, Jim, 2317 01:54:44,900 --> 01:54:46,500 and I think that's a very smart move. 2318 01:54:46,700 --> 01:54:49,400 He's tied for the lead, virtually assures himself of a par. 2319 01:54:49,900 --> 01:54:52,100 And with his short game, he could make birdie. 2320 01:54:53,700 --> 01:54:55,300 You ain't gonna have that luxury, Dave. 2321 01:54:57,900 --> 01:54:59,000 Not if you play to win. 2322 01:55:26,100 --> 01:55:28,000 Well, we've seen this position before. 2323 01:55:28,200 --> 01:55:31,200 McAvoy with another perfect drive at the 18th. 2324 01:55:31,400 --> 01:55:33,000 The last thing he needs right now, Jim, 2325 01:55:33,100 --> 01:55:35,400 is an excuse to go for the green again. 2326 01:55:35,900 --> 01:55:37,100 I didn't catch it all. 2327 01:55:37,400 --> 01:55:39,800 That's okay. You have to lay up, then. 2328 01:56:05,800 --> 01:56:07,900 Jj 2329 01:56:15,900 --> 01:56:17,200 This is for par. 2330 01:56:20,700 --> 01:56:21,700 So birdie wins it. 2331 01:56:21,900 --> 01:56:22,900 Birdie wins it. 2332 01:56:23,200 --> 01:56:25,800 That's par. Lower 3rd. 2333 01:56:26,000 --> 01:56:27,800 - He's in the lead now. - Jacobsen"s in the lead. 2334 01:56:27,800 --> 01:56:28,800 Eight under. 2335 01:56:28,900 --> 01:56:30,500 And they all have to catch him. 2336 01:56:30,700 --> 01:56:31,700 You or me, Dave? 2337 01:56:41,800 --> 01:56:42,800 Wanna lay up? 2338 01:56:44,500 --> 01:56:45,500 He's layin' up. 2339 01:56:46,800 --> 01:56:47,800 He's layin' up. 2340 01:56:48,800 --> 01:56:49,800 Yeah. 2341 01:56:49,900 --> 01:56:51,700 Birdie to tie, eagle to win. 2342 01:56:52,100 --> 01:56:54,000 Gutless wonder's layin' up. 2343 01:56:54,600 --> 01:56:56,600 It's a birdie to win and par to tie for you. 2344 01:56:57,100 --> 01:56:58,100 You lay up, too, man. 2345 01:56:59,600 --> 01:57:01,600 You can still make a... birdie layin' up. 2346 01:57:02,900 --> 01:57:04,000 You know somethin', Romes? 2347 01:57:04,600 --> 01:57:06,700 If I make a eagle, that puts me 10 under. 2348 01:57:07,200 --> 01:57:09,700 No one's ever finished an open 10 under, not even Nicklaus. 2349 01:57:11,200 --> 01:57:13,000 You don't need an eagle to win, Roy. 2350 01:57:13,500 --> 01:57:15,400 Birdie wins! Par ties! 2351 01:57:15,600 --> 01:57:16,600 Now lay it up. 2352 01:57:19,700 --> 01:57:21,000 Birdie wins! Par ties! 2353 01:57:21,100 --> 01:57:23,500 Look, you can hole out a wedge for a goddamn eagle. 2354 01:57:25,800 --> 01:57:27,000 This is everything, ain't it? 2355 01:57:27,600 --> 01:57:29,300 This is the choice it comes down to. 2356 01:57:29,400 --> 01:57:31,100 This is our immortality. 2357 01:57:31,500 --> 01:57:33,100 You don't need to be thinkin' immortality. 2358 01:57:33,600 --> 01:57:35,400 You need to be thinkin', "hit the 7-iron"! 2359 01:57:39,300 --> 01:57:40,900 Oh, no, no, no, no, no. 2360 01:57:41,100 --> 01:57:42,600 This is what always happens. 2361 01:57:43,400 --> 01:57:44,400 He's goin' for it. 2362 01:57:44,700 --> 01:57:45,700 Go for it! 2363 01:57:49,200 --> 01:57:50,400 Molly, get a grip. 2364 01:57:51,300 --> 01:57:53,500 He only needs par to tie. Tell him to lay up. 2365 01:57:53,700 --> 01:57:54,700 He'll listen to you. 2366 01:57:54,900 --> 01:57:56,800 Go for it, Roy. Just knock it on. 2367 01:57:57,500 --> 01:58:00,100 Mol... you know, this is why we broke up. 2368 01:58:00,300 --> 01:58:01,700 He always went for it. 2369 01:58:02,200 --> 01:58:03,200 You know what my problem is, 2370 01:58:03,200 --> 01:58:05,700 is I've never been with a man who went for it. 2371 01:58:06,000 --> 01:58:08,300 Well, honey, he's your guy. 2372 01:58:11,200 --> 01:58:12,300 One swing, Roy. 2373 01:58:13,400 --> 01:58:14,900 One good swing. 2374 01:58:18,300 --> 01:58:19,800 John Daly couldn't get there in 2. 2375 01:58:20,000 --> 01:58:20,800 What the hell is he doing? 2376 01:58:20,900 --> 01:58:23,100 Unbelievable that he's doing this. Four days in a row... 2377 01:58:23,300 --> 01:58:25,700 No. It's three days he's put the ball in the water. 2378 01:58:25,700 --> 01:58:27,800 It'll be four days if he hits this 3-wood. 2379 01:58:28,200 --> 01:58:29,200 Unbelievable. 2380 01:58:30,900 --> 01:58:32,300 Come on, baby... 2381 01:58:32,700 --> 01:58:33,500 - Please... - We're home. 2382 01:58:33,700 --> 01:58:35,200 Jj 2383 01:58:35,400 --> 01:58:36,600 This has a chance. 2384 01:58:37,200 --> 01:58:39,400 It's gotta go... This has got a chance. 2385 01:58:39,800 --> 01:58:40,800 I think he's done it. 2386 01:58:40,900 --> 01:58:43,700 Jj 2387 01:58:43,800 --> 01:58:44,900 A little gust there, Romes. 2388 01:58:51,800 --> 01:58:53,000 D 2389 01:58:55,400 --> 01:58:56,700 Yes, he did... oh! 2390 01:58:56,800 --> 01:58:57,300 - Hold up! - Stay up! 2391 01:58:57,500 --> 01:58:58,900 - Stay up! - Hold up! 2392 01:58:58,900 --> 01:58:59,600 No! 2393 01:58:59,900 --> 01:59:01,000 - Stay up! Stay... - Whoa! 2394 01:59:05,100 --> 01:59:06,900 No! No! Go back! Back! 2395 01:59:14,600 --> 01:59:15,700 Aw... shit! 2396 01:59:16,000 --> 01:59:17,800 Jj 2397 01:59:18,100 --> 01:59:19,900 You can still make par from up there, Roy. 2398 01:59:20,500 --> 01:59:21,500 She's right, pods. 2399 01:59:21,700 --> 01:59:23,000 Take a drop and a stroke up and down, 2400 01:59:23,000 --> 01:59:24,000 we'll make par, we'll tie. 2401 01:59:24,200 --> 01:59:25,200 I nutted that thing. 2402 01:59:25,900 --> 01:59:26,900 I mean, I nutted it. 2403 01:59:27,700 --> 01:59:28,400 I know you did, man. 2404 01:59:28,600 --> 01:59:30,100 You put a helluva move on that, man. 2405 01:59:30,300 --> 01:59:32,300 Little gust from the gods cost me. 2406 01:59:32,900 --> 01:59:35,000 Okay, look, we'll go up there, we'll take our drop, we'll tie, 2407 01:59:35,000 --> 01:59:36,200 and we'll win it in the playoff. 2408 01:59:36,200 --> 01:59:37,200 I can make that shot! 2409 01:59:37,300 --> 01:59:39,200 I know you can, Roy, but not now! 2410 01:59:39,400 --> 01:59:40,400 Now! 2411 01:59:40,800 --> 01:59:42,800 I'm playin' it from right here, now! 2412 01:59:44,800 --> 01:59:46,900 Take your drop and make your par, Roy. 2413 01:59:47,000 --> 01:59:48,000 Now. 2414 01:59:48,200 --> 01:59:49,200 Take a drop, Roy. 2415 01:59:50,100 --> 01:59:50,800 Gimme a ball. 2416 01:59:50,900 --> 01:59:52,200 Unbelievable. 2417 01:59:55,400 --> 01:59:56,600 I can't watch this. 2418 02:00:03,500 --> 02:00:04,200 Fourth shot. 2419 02:00:04,400 --> 02:00:05,500 - Aw, honey. - Oh, my god. 2420 02:00:05,700 --> 02:00:06,900 Jimmy, I don't believe this. 2421 02:00:07,000 --> 02:00:10,100 He could go up, use the drop zone, make par, 2422 02:00:10,500 --> 02:00:12,000 force a playoff with Jacobsen, 2423 02:00:12,600 --> 02:00:13,600 and get outta here. 2424 02:00:13,600 --> 02:00:15,700 Easy, guys. Now, he could still make a five. 2425 02:00:15,900 --> 02:00:17,100 - That's right. - He can still make a five. 2426 02:00:17,100 --> 02:00:18,300 We could still have a playoff. 2427 02:00:18,400 --> 02:00:19,700 Stay with him, Paulie. 2428 02:00:33,000 --> 02:00:34,300 Oh, no! 2429 02:00:41,000 --> 02:00:42,000 Gimme another ball. 2430 02:00:42,700 --> 02:00:43,700 Take a drop, Roy. 2431 02:00:43,700 --> 02:00:44,500 Roy, just... 2432 02:00:44,700 --> 02:00:45,700 Gimme another ball! 2433 02:00:47,000 --> 02:00:48,300 Roy, just take your drop. 2434 02:00:55,300 --> 02:00:57,400 Droppin' five. Hittin® six. 2435 02:00:57,700 --> 02:00:59,000 What the hell is he gonna do? 2436 02:00:59,000 --> 02:01:00,200 Why would he hit it from here? 2437 02:01:00,200 --> 02:01:02,000 All he had to do was walk up there, take a drop, 2438 02:01:02,100 --> 02:01:03,500 and make a 5, for cryin' out loud. 2439 02:01:03,700 --> 02:01:04,700 That's insane. 2440 02:01:05,200 --> 02:01:06,600 Somebody tackle him! 2441 02:01:09,400 --> 02:01:10,400 Gimme another ball. 2442 02:01:15,600 --> 02:01:16,700 Awww! 2443 02:01:17,600 --> 02:01:18,600 Shit! 2444 02:01:23,000 --> 02:01:25,400 Droppin' seven, hittin' his eighth shot. 2445 02:01:32,100 --> 02:01:34,300 I'll tell ya, it's a miracle he lasted this long. 2446 02:01:35,600 --> 02:01:38,700 Jj 2447 02:01:42,600 --> 02:01:45,000 Look at Simms. We ought to have a camera on Simms. 2448 02:01:45,200 --> 02:01:46,200 He can't watch. 2449 02:01:46,400 --> 02:01:49,200 Somebody tell this clown he doesn't have to hit it from there. 2450 02:01:51,300 --> 02:01:53,800 All right. Now he's droppin' nine. He's hittin' ten. 2451 02:01:55,400 --> 02:01:58,600 Jj 2452 02:02:06,500 --> 02:02:08,400 Oh, god. I'm gonna faint. 2453 02:02:10,800 --> 02:02:11,900 Oh, Jesus. 2454 02:02:19,200 --> 02:02:21,000 This is the last ball you got in the bag, Roy. 2455 02:02:21,300 --> 02:02:23,000 You get this one wet, we're disqualified. 2456 02:02:23,600 --> 02:02:25,000 I can make it across. 2457 02:02:25,300 --> 02:02:26,300 Well, then do it. 2458 02:02:26,700 --> 02:02:27,900 Quit fuckin' around. 2459 02:02:32,700 --> 02:02:33,800 Oh... 2460 02:02:37,600 --> 02:02:40,100 He's crazy. 2461 02:02:41,400 --> 02:02:43,400 Oh, god. He's right. 2462 02:02:43,600 --> 02:02:45,400 You're right, Roy. Just knock it on. 2463 02:02:45,600 --> 02:02:46,900 Let 'er rip! 2464 02:02:47,100 --> 02:02:48,600 Oh, Molly, you're losin' it. 2465 02:02:48,700 --> 02:02:51,200 No, I have lost it, and so has he. 2466 02:02:53,800 --> 02:02:54,500 He's crazy. 2467 02:02:54,600 --> 02:02:55,700 Honey, so are you. 2468 02:02:55,800 --> 02:02:57,900 11. Now this is a 12, guys. 2469 02:02:58,100 --> 02:02:59,900 Now he's gotta start worrying about qualifying 2470 02:02:59,900 --> 02:03:01,900 for next year's open and the masters here. 2471 02:03:02,100 --> 02:03:03,300 But he's lost this tournament. 2472 02:03:03,400 --> 02:03:05,800 He'll end up selling countess Mara ties 2473 02:03:06,000 --> 02:03:08,400 and renting golf carts the rest of his life. Look at this! 2474 02:03:08,900 --> 02:03:10,800 I... I don't know... Even know what I'm feeling, all right. 2475 02:03:10,900 --> 02:03:12,700 This is the most painful thing I've ever seen. 2476 02:03:12,800 --> 02:03:14,100 You know what's crazy, Jimmy? 2477 02:03:14,200 --> 02:03:16,100 If he doesn't finish the hole with this ball, 2478 02:03:16,400 --> 02:03:18,900 he can't turn in a card. He's disqualified. 2479 02:03:19,100 --> 02:03:20,300 Oh, my god. 2480 02:03:20,300 --> 02:03:22,100 Oh, dear lord, please. Oh, dear lord. 2481 02:03:35,800 --> 02:03:38,700 Get up! Get up! Come on, baby! 2482 02:03:38,900 --> 02:03:40,500 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. 2483 02:03:41,200 --> 02:03:43,300 Jj 2484 02:03:44,700 --> 02:03:45,700 There it goes! 2485 02:03:46,100 --> 02:03:47,100 Get over. 2486 02:03:49,300 --> 02:03:50,600 There ya go! 2487 02:03:50,900 --> 02:03:53,300 Jj 2488 02:03:53,500 --> 02:03:54,500 He's over. 2489 02:04:18,000 --> 02:04:19,000 No! 2490 02:04:19,200 --> 02:04:20,200 Jj 2491 02:04:22,500 --> 02:04:24,000 I can't believe it! 2492 02:04:26,700 --> 02:04:28,300 I love you! 2493 02:04:30,400 --> 02:04:31,400 Come on! 2494 02:04:38,400 --> 02:04:42,100 Jj 2495 02:04:47,200 --> 02:04:47,900 Unbelievable! 2496 02:04:48,100 --> 02:04:49,300 Jesus Christ! 2497 02:04:49,500 --> 02:04:51,200 Did you see this? What was that? 2498 02:04:52,700 --> 02:04:55,100 That was a 12. That was a 12. 2499 02:04:55,300 --> 02:04:57,700 He was on the green, on in 12. 2500 02:05:05,800 --> 02:05:07,900 Jj 2501 02:05:15,600 --> 02:05:19,100 Jj 2502 02:06:02,100 --> 02:06:04,100 Well, boss, we blew that one. 2503 02:06:04,300 --> 02:06:06,300 I didn't come here to play for no second, Romeo. 2504 02:06:06,500 --> 02:06:08,300 And Simms will always be second. 2505 02:06:13,000 --> 02:06:14,900 Hey, meet you back at the winnebago, man. 2506 02:06:15,100 --> 02:06:16,400 I'll get the blender fired up! 2507 02:06:18,000 --> 02:06:19,500 Yeah. Yeah. Thank you. Thank you. 2508 02:06:20,200 --> 02:06:21,900 I just gave away the us open. 2509 02:06:23,800 --> 02:06:25,500 Excuse me. Roy! 2510 02:06:26,200 --> 02:06:27,200 Roy! 2511 02:06:27,800 --> 02:06:29,300 That was incredible! 2512 02:06:29,700 --> 02:06:32,100 That was the shot of this tournament! My god! 2513 02:06:32,300 --> 02:06:34,700 - Did you hear the people... - Molly, I just gave away the us open. 2514 02:06:34,700 --> 02:06:36,200 - I mean... - Oh, hell, Roy. It doesn't matter. 2515 02:06:36,300 --> 02:06:37,300 Molly, I just... 2516 02:06:37,300 --> 02:06:38,700 - Just give him a minute. - One time in my life, 2517 02:06:38,700 --> 02:06:40,300 I know the safe place to hit the lay-up, 2518 02:06:40,400 --> 02:06:41,900 and I still... shit! 2519 02:06:42,100 --> 02:06:43,800 I still can't make myself do it. 2520 02:06:43,800 --> 02:06:45,300 - It doesn't matter, Roy. - My whole career, 2521 02:06:45,400 --> 02:06:47,000 my whole life on the line, and I... 2522 02:06:47,900 --> 02:06:50,800 I just made a 12 on the last hole of the us open! 2523 02:06:50,900 --> 02:06:52,000 That's right, you sure did, Roy, 2524 02:06:52,000 --> 02:06:53,900 and it was the greatest 12 of all time! 2525 02:06:54,400 --> 02:06:56,700 No one's gonna remember the open five years from now... 2526 02:06:56,900 --> 02:06:57,600 Who won, who lost... 2527 02:06:57,800 --> 02:06:59,400 But they're gonna remember your 12! 2528 02:06:59,900 --> 02:07:01,300 My god, Roy! It was... 2529 02:07:01,700 --> 02:07:03,000 Why, it's immortal! 2530 02:07:03,200 --> 02:07:05,000 I am so proud of you! 2531 02:07:09,700 --> 02:07:11,200 I gotta hand it to you, Roy. 2532 02:07:11,800 --> 02:07:14,900 When you go down, you go down in flames. 2533 02:07:15,200 --> 02:07:17,000 Roy, never mind what... 2534 02:07:17,200 --> 02:07:18,900 Roy... kiss me. 2535 02:07:20,600 --> 02:07:21,800 Hey, David, you got a minute? 2536 02:07:21,900 --> 02:07:24,200 - Not right now. - David! David! 2537 02:07:24,600 --> 02:07:26,100 Can I have your autograph? 2538 02:07:26,500 --> 02:07:29,000 Sure. I always got time for my fans, darlin'. 2539 02:07:29,200 --> 02:07:31,400 Well, don't you look cute. Come on under. 2540 02:07:39,100 --> 02:07:40,700 Nice par, David. 2541 02:07:43,700 --> 02:07:47,200 Jj 2542 02:08:26,500 --> 02:08:29,800 Hey, do you know that by finishing in the top 15 at the open, 2543 02:08:30,000 --> 02:08:31,500 you qualified to be in it next year? 2544 02:08:33,000 --> 02:08:34,400 - Really? - Mm-hmm. 2545 02:08:35,800 --> 02:08:36,700 I didn't know that. 2546 02:08:36,800 --> 02:08:39,100 Yeah, so I'm thinkin' with your game, 2547 02:08:39,300 --> 02:08:41,800 you could go back to the qualifying school and go out on tour. 2548 02:08:43,600 --> 02:08:44,600 Nah. 2549 02:08:45,000 --> 02:08:46,100 Then I wouldn't see you. 2550 02:08:47,200 --> 02:08:48,600 Uh, well, actually, 2551 02:08:48,700 --> 02:08:51,300 I picked up a whole bunch of new clients at the open. 2552 02:08:51,700 --> 02:08:54,200 A lot of the guys on tour said if I could do that much for you, 2553 02:08:54,300 --> 02:08:55,600 imagine what I could do for them. 2554 02:08:57,900 --> 02:08:59,900 Yeah, there's a lotta head cases out there. 2555 02:09:01,400 --> 02:09:03,600 You know, a man goes through what I've gone through, 2556 02:09:03,700 --> 02:09:05,000 he's supposed to learn somethin'. 2557 02:09:05,500 --> 02:09:07,000 I'm tryin' to figure out what I learned. 2558 02:09:11,500 --> 02:09:12,500 Oh, yeah. 2559 02:09:12,900 --> 02:09:15,600 I mean, you learned a little discipline, a little self-control. 2560 02:09:16,000 --> 02:09:17,300 Yeah. I learned, uh... 2561 02:09:17,800 --> 02:09:19,000 You can't just listen to your heart. 2562 02:09:19,100 --> 02:09:21,500 Ya gotta... Listen to your brain. 2563 02:09:21,900 --> 02:09:24,300 I'm learning how to listen to that tuning fork, 2564 02:09:24,800 --> 02:09:26,000 throw caution to the wind, 2565 02:09:26,200 --> 02:09:29,900 and take crazy risks that I never thought were possible. 2566 02:09:30,900 --> 02:09:31,600 Aw, come on, Molly, 2567 02:09:31,800 --> 02:09:33,800 when did you ever take a crazy risk? 2568 02:09:35,200 --> 02:09:36,500 Well, I'm with you, Roy. 2569 02:09:40,300 --> 02:09:41,300 I'm with you. 2570 02:09:44,500 --> 02:09:45,500 Yeah. 2571 02:09:46,400 --> 02:09:47,400 You know, Roy... 2572 02:09:48,300 --> 02:09:49,700 We could kiss. 2573 02:09:51,700 --> 02:09:54,700 You mean like a... No-harm, no-foul kiss? 2574 02:09:54,900 --> 02:09:57,700 Yeah, kind of a semi-platonic... little... 2575 02:09:58,600 --> 02:10:00,400 Sweet... innocent... 2576 02:10:00,900 --> 02:10:01,600 Good idea! 2577 02:10:01,800 --> 02:10:03,100 Mmm. Yeah? 2578 02:10:03,329 --> 02:10:05,098 ♪ close and lock the door ♪ 2579 02:10:05,165 --> 02:10:07,533 ♪ duck down to the floor ♪ 2580 02:10:07,600 --> 02:10:11,271 ♪ forget the phone until you see the sun ♪ 2581 02:10:12,238 --> 02:10:14,807 ♪ baby, it's all right ♪ 2582 02:10:14,875 --> 02:10:17,310 ♪ 'cause ya know I'll make this fun ♪ 2583 02:10:17,377 --> 02:10:20,180 ♪ and when we see the morning light ♪ 2584 02:10:20,246 --> 02:10:22,482 ♪ well, we're right back where we started from ♪ 2585 02:10:22,548 --> 02:10:27,253 ♪ 'cause this could take all night ♪ 2586 02:10:27,320 --> 02:10:30,556 ♪ and it's a dirty, lowdown job ♪ 2587 02:10:30,623 --> 02:10:32,292 ♪ when ya do it right ♪ 2588 02:10:32,358 --> 02:10:35,095 ♪ well, you can turn it off, you can leave it on ♪ 2589 02:10:35,161 --> 02:10:38,364 ♪ I don't care about the light ♪ 2590 02:10:38,431 --> 02:10:42,402 ♪ baby, this could take all night ♪ 2591 02:11:00,186 --> 02:11:03,189 ♪ baby, don't be afraid ♪ 2592 02:11:03,256 --> 02:11:05,926 ♪ a little work won't hurt your back ♪ 2593 02:11:05,992 --> 02:11:08,094 ♪ but just in case I'm wrong ♪ 2594 02:11:08,161 --> 02:11:10,763 ♪ you'll be smilin' when they pronounce ya dead ♪ 2595 02:11:10,830 --> 02:11:15,235 ♪ 'cause this could take all night ♪ 2596 02:11:15,301 --> 02:11:18,204 ♪ well, it's a dirty, lowdown job ♪ 2597 02:11:18,271 --> 02:11:20,340 ♪ when ya do it right ♪ 2598 02:11:20,406 --> 02:11:22,943 ♪ well, you can turn it off, you can leave it on ♪ 2599 02:11:23,009 --> 02:11:26,046 ♪ I don't care about the light ♪ 2600 02:11:26,112 --> 02:11:31,117 ♪ baby, this could take all night ♪ 2601 02:11:31,184 --> 02:11:33,886 ♪ well, you can turn it off, you can leave it on ♪ 2602 02:11:33,954 --> 02:11:36,990 ♪ I don't care about the light ♪ 2603 02:11:37,057 --> 02:11:42,295 ♪ baby, this could take all night ♪ 2604 02:11:42,362 --> 02:11:43,663 ♪ yeah ♪ 2605 02:11:51,671 --> 02:11:54,107 [new song begins] 2606 02:12:01,047 --> 02:12:06,953 ♪ I'm goin' back to Salome ♪ 2607 02:12:09,555 --> 02:12:16,529 ♪ things could get ugly if I stay ♪ 2608 02:12:18,031 --> 02:12:25,305 ♪ and I was just leavin' anyway, yeah ♪ 2609 02:12:25,371 --> 02:12:29,809 ♪ I could sink or swim, but then again ♪ 2610 02:12:29,875 --> 02:12:35,081 ♪ I could go back to Salome ♪ 2611 02:12:35,148 --> 02:12:41,454 ♪ to be the champion of lost causes ♪ 2612 02:12:43,623 --> 02:12:50,230 ♪ to be the cutter of the losses ♪ 2613 02:12:52,232 --> 02:12:57,737 ♪ or just to let sleeping dogs lay ♪ 2614 02:12:59,439 --> 02:13:03,843 ♪ I might be worse for wear, but, darlin', I don't care ♪ 2615 02:13:03,909 --> 02:13:09,582 ♪ I'm goin' back to Salome ♪ 2616 02:13:09,649 --> 02:13:16,189 ♪ to find a friend ♪ 2617 02:13:17,557 --> 02:13:26,132 ♪ to find my way home again ♪ 2618 02:13:26,199 --> 02:13:32,872 ♪ dear lord, please lead me not astray ♪ 2619 02:13:32,938 --> 02:13:37,877 ♪ 'cause I could shoot to kill, but better still ♪ 2620 02:13:37,943 --> 02:13:42,215 ♪ I could go back to Salome ♪ 2621 02:14:00,300 --> 02:14:08,274 ♪ to find a friend ♪ 2622 02:14:08,341 --> 02:14:16,582 ♪ to find my way home again ♪ 2623 02:14:16,649 --> 02:14:24,824 ♪ and if I die before today ♪ 2624 02:14:24,890 --> 02:14:27,393 ♪ then you can box my ass ♪ 2625 02:14:27,460 --> 02:14:29,462 ♪ speak kindly when I pass ♪ 2626 02:14:29,529 --> 02:14:35,101 ♪ and take me back to Salome ♪