1 00:04:47,791 --> 00:04:49,225 Hey, Lucky, how you doing? 2 00:04:49,491 --> 00:04:50,992 You're nothing. 3 00:04:51,457 --> 00:04:52,992 You're nothing. 4 00:04:53,191 --> 00:04:54,658 Thank you. 5 00:05:00,325 --> 00:05:02,023 Good morning, sweetheart. 6 00:05:02,025 --> 00:05:03,090 Hi, doll. 7 00:05:03,092 --> 00:05:05,959 Plenty of cream and sugar, just like you like it. 8 00:05:12,157 --> 00:05:13,224 Perfect. 9 00:05:19,258 --> 00:05:20,992 Lucky! 10 00:05:21,523 --> 00:05:22,590 Oh, God. 11 00:05:23,158 --> 00:05:24,959 Those things are gonna kill you. 12 00:05:25,224 --> 00:05:26,756 If they could've, they would've. 13 00:06:10,523 --> 00:06:12,620 - All right, see you. - Oh, okay. 14 00:06:12,622 --> 00:06:15,958 Okay. Bye, Lucky. See you, Joe. 15 00:06:17,024 --> 00:06:18,257 What you stuck on now? 16 00:06:20,489 --> 00:06:27,256 Uh, seven-letter word for augur, A-U-G-U-R. 17 00:06:32,655 --> 00:06:34,056 I know. 18 00:06:34,556 --> 00:06:35,723 Go on, honey. 19 00:06:36,355 --> 00:06:37,621 Portend. 20 00:06:37,623 --> 00:06:41,054 Portend. P-O-R-T-E-N-D. 21 00:06:41,056 --> 00:06:42,589 That's it. Thank you, dear. 22 00:06:43,156 --> 00:06:44,222 Give me that. 23 00:06:46,155 --> 00:06:47,354 Well, this is easy. 24 00:06:47,356 --> 00:06:50,290 I mean, what you gonna do when you get the Sunday puzzle? 25 00:06:51,056 --> 00:06:52,256 Give me another. 26 00:06:54,521 --> 00:06:59,723 All right, a three-letter word for asshole starting with a "J"? 27 00:07:02,188 --> 00:07:05,389 Clever... very clever. 28 00:08:13,486 --> 00:08:15,087 Cunts! 29 00:08:23,353 --> 00:08:25,083 Buenos días, Lucky. 30 00:08:25,085 --> 00:08:26,253 Buenos días. 31 00:08:52,186 --> 00:08:53,549 How are you today? 32 00:08:53,551 --> 00:08:55,086 So far, so good. 33 00:08:58,386 --> 00:08:59,683 Who's that again? 34 00:08:59,685 --> 00:09:02,317 That's my youngest son, Juan. 35 00:09:02,319 --> 00:09:04,987 Oh yeah, yeah, that's John, in English. 36 00:09:05,552 --> 00:09:08,185 Like John Wayne. Juan Wayne. 37 00:09:09,318 --> 00:09:11,684 He's gonna be ten on Saturday. 38 00:09:11,686 --> 00:09:12,784 Oh, that's great. 39 00:09:12,786 --> 00:09:14,419 It's his birthday. 40 00:09:15,452 --> 00:09:17,619 Well, I gotta go. My shows are on. 41 00:09:27,252 --> 00:09:29,182 Juan Wayne. 42 00:09:29,184 --> 00:09:30,585 Juan Wayne. 43 00:09:35,284 --> 00:09:37,349 Go ahead and tell us about yourself. 44 00:09:37,351 --> 00:09:39,382 Hi, I'm Stephanie Moreno! 45 00:09:39,384 --> 00:09:42,349 I'm from Pueblo, Colorado, and I'm here to make some money! 46 00:09:42,351 --> 00:09:44,248 Hi, I'm David Mulbec. 47 00:09:44,250 --> 00:09:46,551 I'm from Chicago, and I'm here to make some money! 48 00:09:47,318 --> 00:09:49,448 Hi, I'm Marlene Moscavitz... 49 00:09:49,450 --> 00:09:52,351 Ann Arbor, Michigan, and I'm here to make some money! 50 00:09:54,218 --> 00:09:56,483 Join us and find out who's gonna walk away... 51 00:09:56,485 --> 00:09:59,616 with a brand, new car on, Take a Guess. 52 00:09:59,618 --> 00:10:01,148 Have you been turned down... 53 00:10:01,150 --> 00:10:02,382 for life insurance? If you are... 54 00:10:02,384 --> 00:10:04,382 They always yell at ya'. 55 00:10:04,384 --> 00:10:06,017 You can obtain full-term li... 56 00:10:19,084 --> 00:10:20,451 Oh, shit. 57 00:10:42,316 --> 00:10:44,617 Is realism a thing? 58 00:10:47,282 --> 00:10:49,216 Okay, so it's a thing, huh? 59 00:10:49,648 --> 00:10:53,284 All right, and that's ah, seven letters. 60 00:10:55,483 --> 00:10:57,117 Hold on a minute. 61 00:11:09,615 --> 00:11:12,716 Okay... "Realism, noun." 62 00:11:13,582 --> 00:11:17,446 "The attitude or practice of accepting a situation 63 00:11:17,448 --> 00:11:22,115 as it is and being prepared to deal with it accordingly." 64 00:11:23,615 --> 00:11:25,016 Now the other one. 65 00:11:26,116 --> 00:11:30,279 "The quality or fact representing a person, thing, 66 00:11:30,281 --> 00:11:36,216 or situation accurately or in a way that is true to life. 67 00:11:46,648 --> 00:11:49,412 I always thought that what we all agreed on 68 00:11:49,414 --> 00:11:52,380 was what we were looking at, but that's bullshit, 69 00:11:52,382 --> 00:11:55,081 because what I see is not necessarily what you see. 70 00:12:01,080 --> 00:12:02,449 Realism. 71 00:12:03,482 --> 00:12:08,348 R-E-A-L-I... 72 00:12:09,014 --> 00:12:11,148 That's it. That's some heavy shit. 73 00:12:13,314 --> 00:12:14,681 She's gonna blow it. 74 00:12:18,048 --> 00:12:19,380 The Dark Ages? 75 00:12:19,382 --> 00:12:20,679 No, I'm sorry. 76 00:12:20,681 --> 00:12:23,514 The answer you're looking for is "the Renaissance." 77 00:12:24,546 --> 00:12:27,648 You blew it, honey. There goes your fucking Buick. 78 00:12:33,346 --> 00:12:37,014 Okay, pal. Goodbye, I'll talk to you later. 79 00:12:51,080 --> 00:12:54,248 Now you know me, I don't like to cause a scene. 80 00:12:55,113 --> 00:12:57,579 Hey, fuck you, I don't. 81 00:12:58,347 --> 00:13:02,045 So that night, I decided to have a coming-to-God meeting. 82 00:13:02,047 --> 00:13:05,478 I locked the front door and sent everybody back into the kitchen. 83 00:13:05,480 --> 00:13:08,577 Took down my Saturday Night Special over there. 84 00:13:08,579 --> 00:13:11,644 And I said, "Gentlemen, if you want to fuck me... 85 00:13:11,646 --> 00:13:15,480 and I know you do, you should buy me dinner first." 86 00:13:16,146 --> 00:13:19,279 Then I drew that peace-maker... 87 00:13:19,779 --> 00:13:22,446 two rounds in the ceiling and I said, 88 00:13:23,513 --> 00:13:29,080 "I know that all of you are stealing from me. 89 00:13:31,613 --> 00:13:35,180 Just. Don't. Get. Greedy." 90 00:13:37,279 --> 00:13:40,113 And I've been in the black ever since. 91 00:13:42,912 --> 00:13:45,509 I see her standing there, the room was filled with gun smoke. 92 00:13:45,511 --> 00:13:48,680 And everyone's just shitting their goddamn pants. 93 00:13:49,478 --> 00:13:51,710 I tell you, the sexiest thing I'd ever seen. 94 00:13:51,712 --> 00:13:54,577 I wooed him with my feminine charm. 95 00:13:54,579 --> 00:13:56,546 Nothing but class with this one. 96 00:13:58,045 --> 00:13:59,577 Charmed. 97 00:13:59,579 --> 00:14:01,546 You were good to Momma last night. 98 00:14:02,479 --> 00:14:04,646 Lucky! Bloody Maria? 99 00:14:05,111 --> 00:14:06,245 Por favor. 100 00:14:07,077 --> 00:14:09,509 - Lucky! - Hey, Paulie. 101 00:14:09,511 --> 00:14:11,078 What's the good word? 102 00:14:12,412 --> 00:14:15,243 Realism is a thing. 103 00:14:15,245 --> 00:14:17,046 Oh yeah? How do you mean? 104 00:14:17,445 --> 00:14:22,146 It's the practice of accepting a situation as it is... 105 00:14:23,443 --> 00:14:28,375 and being prepared to deal with it accordingly. 106 00:14:28,377 --> 00:14:32,442 So what you're saying is, "What you see is what you get." 107 00:14:32,444 --> 00:14:35,608 But what you see is not what I get. 108 00:14:35,610 --> 00:14:37,177 Okay. 109 00:14:41,744 --> 00:14:43,577 - Elaine! - What? 110 00:14:44,110 --> 00:14:46,210 - Realism is a thing. - What? 111 00:14:47,410 --> 00:14:50,277 - Realism. - Here we go again. 112 00:14:51,210 --> 00:14:53,944 Vincent, hand me my gun. 113 00:14:54,443 --> 00:14:55,707 Easy, partner. 114 00:14:55,709 --> 00:14:57,944 You're a misdemeanor fucking with a felony. 115 00:15:06,443 --> 00:15:08,010 Hey, Howard. 116 00:15:08,211 --> 00:15:09,544 Howie, what are you drinking? 117 00:15:09,743 --> 00:15:11,611 Something strong. 118 00:15:14,076 --> 00:15:16,176 What's the matter, Howard? 119 00:15:16,610 --> 00:15:18,341 President Roosevelt escaped. 120 00:15:18,343 --> 00:15:20,711 - What are you talking about? - Presidents. 121 00:15:21,275 --> 00:15:23,109 - Which one? - Roosevelt. 122 00:15:23,343 --> 00:15:24,343 Yeah, which one? 123 00:15:24,709 --> 00:15:28,707 No, my tortoise, President Roosevelt, he escaped. 124 00:15:28,709 --> 00:15:31,210 How does a hundred-year-old tortoise escape? 125 00:15:31,442 --> 00:15:34,273 I left the gate open when I went to check the mail. 126 00:15:34,275 --> 00:15:36,976 Where is your mailbox, Europe? 127 00:15:38,577 --> 00:15:40,710 I saw him eyeing that gate the other day. 128 00:15:41,642 --> 00:15:43,710 He had to have timed it out perfectly. 129 00:15:44,309 --> 00:15:46,210 I searched our entire neighborhood. 130 00:15:46,475 --> 00:15:48,443 Did you search your entire yard? 131 00:15:49,375 --> 00:15:52,073 Hey, we're talking about his best friend here! 132 00:15:52,075 --> 00:15:55,108 - Thank you, Lucky. - You're welcome, Howard. 133 00:15:55,110 --> 00:15:56,439 You're right, you're right, I'm sorry. 134 00:15:56,441 --> 00:15:58,109 We shouldn't make fun. 135 00:15:59,441 --> 00:16:03,375 I'm gonna miss him. He's outlived two of my wives. 136 00:16:05,376 --> 00:16:06,706 I'm going to the W.C. 137 00:16:06,708 --> 00:16:08,143 Okay, pal. 138 00:16:10,041 --> 00:16:11,343 You know, 139 00:16:12,208 --> 00:16:17,075 friendship between animals and humans is essential. 140 00:16:17,707 --> 00:16:22,342 And special. And friendship is essential to the soul. 141 00:16:25,141 --> 00:16:26,407 What? 142 00:16:26,409 --> 00:16:29,606 Friendship is essential to the soul. 143 00:16:29,608 --> 00:16:31,341 It doesn't exist! 144 00:16:32,274 --> 00:16:33,606 What, friendship? 145 00:16:33,608 --> 00:16:35,072 The soul! 146 00:16:35,074 --> 00:16:37,341 Hey, knucklehead, inside voices! 147 00:16:38,307 --> 00:16:41,072 Hey, you gonna let your woman talk to me that way? 148 00:16:41,074 --> 00:16:43,608 I'm not his woman. He's my man. 149 00:16:44,308 --> 00:16:45,705 As far as I'm concerned, 150 00:16:45,707 --> 00:16:48,175 he's just been renting a room for 30 years. 151 00:16:49,308 --> 00:16:51,709 - Sonny and Cher. - I'll drink to that. 152 00:16:52,108 --> 00:16:54,005 Hey, you know they got divorced. 153 00:16:54,007 --> 00:16:56,941 Good thing we never got married. 154 00:18:27,571 --> 00:18:29,939 Jesus Christ. 155 00:18:54,371 --> 00:18:57,338 Jesus! God, this thing. 156 00:18:58,471 --> 00:19:01,338 Can you... never mind. 157 00:19:03,737 --> 00:19:06,238 Oh God. Oh God. 158 00:19:08,404 --> 00:19:10,104 Oh, God. 159 00:19:11,438 --> 00:19:13,239 Why? 160 00:19:15,371 --> 00:19:17,435 Hey, buddy. How the hell are you doing? 161 00:19:17,437 --> 00:19:19,304 You tell me. 162 00:19:19,771 --> 00:19:25,505 Okay... 115 over 70, great. 163 00:19:25,738 --> 00:19:27,038 Thank you, Debbie. 164 00:19:32,404 --> 00:19:34,705 No broken bones. That's good. 165 00:19:35,470 --> 00:19:38,671 CT scan was negative, no sign of concussion. 166 00:19:39,270 --> 00:19:42,434 Blood pressure is good, heart is great. 167 00:19:42,436 --> 00:19:45,938 Lungs are great, even though you smoke. How many packs a day? 168 00:19:46,237 --> 00:19:48,071 I don't know, maybe one. 169 00:19:48,269 --> 00:19:50,536 Well, I really have no explanation for that. 170 00:19:51,502 --> 00:19:54,334 It's a mystery, some sort of scientific anomaly. 171 00:19:54,336 --> 00:19:56,201 All I can figure is it's a combination... 172 00:19:56,203 --> 00:19:59,004 of genetic good luck and you're one tough son of a bitch. 173 00:19:59,470 --> 00:20:01,701 I would try to get you to quit smoking, 174 00:20:01,703 --> 00:20:04,234 but I'm afraid it would do you more harm than good. 175 00:20:04,236 --> 00:20:06,270 You're the only person I would say that to. 176 00:20:07,436 --> 00:20:08,971 So, that's it? 177 00:20:09,369 --> 00:20:12,534 To be clear, you were just standing there 178 00:20:12,536 --> 00:20:14,133 and you got light-headed? 179 00:20:14,135 --> 00:20:15,400 I didn't get light-headed. 180 00:20:15,402 --> 00:20:16,533 So you just fell down? 181 00:20:16,535 --> 00:20:18,704 Yeah. It was weird. 182 00:20:20,703 --> 00:20:23,734 Well, I'll wait for these lab tests to come back 183 00:20:23,736 --> 00:20:26,137 and then I'll let you know about that. 184 00:20:27,069 --> 00:20:28,468 That's it? 185 00:20:28,470 --> 00:20:29,537 That's it. 186 00:20:29,769 --> 00:20:31,237 I'm not dying? 187 00:20:31,435 --> 00:20:33,600 When it comes to things like heart disease 188 00:20:33,602 --> 00:20:36,466 or cancer, at your age, if it was gonna kill you, it would've. 189 00:20:36,468 --> 00:20:37,567 So? 190 00:20:37,569 --> 00:20:39,633 Well, short of shooting you with a silver bullet... 191 00:20:39,635 --> 00:20:41,300 or stabbing you with a wooden stake... 192 00:20:41,302 --> 00:20:44,436 it seems the older you get, the longer you're gonna live. 193 00:20:45,003 --> 00:20:47,136 So, but why did I fall down? 194 00:20:48,301 --> 00:20:49,700 Were you drunk? 195 00:20:49,702 --> 00:20:50,937 No. 196 00:20:51,134 --> 00:20:52,399 Do you get light-headed often? 197 00:20:52,401 --> 00:20:54,303 I don't get light-headed. 198 00:20:54,601 --> 00:20:56,302 Now do you get much exercise? 199 00:20:56,601 --> 00:20:58,366 Yeah, I walk around all the time. 200 00:20:58,368 --> 00:21:00,667 I do five yoga exercises every day... 201 00:21:00,669 --> 00:21:03,500 Twenty-one repetitions each, for years. 202 00:21:03,502 --> 00:21:05,300 Do your knees ever give out? 203 00:21:05,302 --> 00:21:06,435 No. 204 00:21:09,335 --> 00:21:11,132 I could do a lot more tests, 205 00:21:11,134 --> 00:21:12,765 but I think it's gonna turn out to be 206 00:21:12,767 --> 00:21:14,332 exactly what I think it is. 207 00:21:14,334 --> 00:21:15,433 What's that? 208 00:21:15,435 --> 00:21:17,669 You're old, and you're getting older. 209 00:21:18,601 --> 00:21:20,265 That's your diagnosis? 210 00:21:20,267 --> 00:21:21,565 It's all I got. 211 00:21:21,567 --> 00:21:23,601 Well, that's bullshit. 212 00:21:24,734 --> 00:21:27,133 The body is gonna break down at some point. 213 00:21:27,135 --> 00:21:29,100 As far as I know, nobody has lived forever. 214 00:21:29,102 --> 00:21:30,765 It's gonna happen to all of us. 215 00:21:30,767 --> 00:21:33,132 I can do more tests, but I don't want 216 00:21:33,134 --> 00:21:35,465 to do that and you don't want to have it done. 217 00:21:35,467 --> 00:21:37,534 So what am I supposed to do? 218 00:21:38,633 --> 00:21:41,499 At this point, I think it might be a good idea 219 00:21:41,501 --> 00:21:43,566 to get an assisted living person hooked up. 220 00:21:43,568 --> 00:21:44,999 A what? 221 00:21:45,001 --> 00:21:46,466 Assisted living. They come by, 222 00:21:46,468 --> 00:21:49,099 and they help you cook meals, help you bathe. 223 00:21:49,101 --> 00:21:52,465 Oh, I don't know, I'm on my own. 224 00:21:52,467 --> 00:21:54,298 You never get lonely being alone? 225 00:21:54,300 --> 00:21:58,500 There is a difference between being lonely and alone. 226 00:22:00,167 --> 00:22:03,098 You know, I saw this happen with my father. 227 00:22:03,100 --> 00:22:04,398 He started to lose his eyesight, 228 00:22:04,400 --> 00:22:06,135 and with it his ability to drive. 229 00:22:06,600 --> 00:22:08,598 It wasn't getting older that bothered him, 230 00:22:08,600 --> 00:22:11,365 it was the loss of his freedom, his mobility. 231 00:22:11,367 --> 00:22:13,397 It's all fine as long as you realize 232 00:22:13,399 --> 00:22:15,133 it's all part of the process. 233 00:22:17,233 --> 00:22:19,130 Well, how is your old man? 234 00:22:19,132 --> 00:22:21,566 Oh, buddy, he died a year ago. 235 00:22:23,099 --> 00:22:24,701 Wow. 236 00:22:26,667 --> 00:22:28,401 It was peaceful. 237 00:22:34,299 --> 00:22:36,430 You know, most people don't get to where you are. 238 00:22:36,432 --> 00:22:39,130 They get hit by a bus or get leukemia or something. 239 00:22:39,132 --> 00:22:42,198 They never get to the moment that you're in right now. 240 00:22:42,200 --> 00:22:44,596 We have the ability to witness what you're going through, 241 00:22:44,598 --> 00:22:48,499 and clearly examine it and, more importantly, to accept it. 242 00:22:49,398 --> 00:22:51,998 I know that's kind of heavy for this hour of the morning 243 00:22:52,000 --> 00:22:54,064 but you're in exceptional health for a person your age, 244 00:22:54,066 --> 00:22:55,629 and if you need anything whatsoever, 245 00:22:55,631 --> 00:22:58,032 you call me or you just come by. 246 00:22:58,733 --> 00:22:59,767 Okay. 247 00:23:01,065 --> 00:23:04,099 You've been very good today, so you get one of these. 248 00:23:05,165 --> 00:23:07,500 What do I do with this, stick it up my ass? 249 00:23:08,599 --> 00:23:10,433 How about you just suck it? 250 00:23:28,565 --> 00:23:30,198 Oh, boy. 251 00:24:02,063 --> 00:24:03,299 You're nothing! 252 00:24:06,564 --> 00:24:08,165 Yeah. 253 00:24:28,996 --> 00:24:30,728 Everyday with this guy. 254 00:24:30,730 --> 00:24:33,394 Kneedler said it was all right for me to smoke. 255 00:24:33,396 --> 00:24:37,461 Not in here. And when did Kneedler ever say that? 256 00:24:37,463 --> 00:24:38,994 This morning. 257 00:24:38,996 --> 00:24:41,231 Oh, you know, I was getting a little worried. 258 00:24:41,996 --> 00:24:45,196 Bet you was getting that prostate checked. 259 00:24:46,063 --> 00:24:47,397 I fell. 260 00:24:49,463 --> 00:24:51,530 On my bony ass, I fell. 261 00:24:58,362 --> 00:25:01,527 - Are you okay? - That's subjective. 262 00:25:01,529 --> 00:25:04,630 Pam! Loretta! Lucky fell down! 263 00:25:05,429 --> 00:25:08,027 Let's not make a production out of it! 264 00:25:08,029 --> 00:25:09,493 Well, what did Kneedler say? 265 00:25:09,495 --> 00:25:11,163 He said I'm old. 266 00:25:11,761 --> 00:25:13,160 And that's news to you? 267 00:25:13,162 --> 00:25:14,397 Did he give you anything? 268 00:25:14,761 --> 00:25:17,462 I don't know, man, it's all bullshit. 269 00:25:18,062 --> 00:25:19,530 Wait, where you going? 270 00:25:52,495 --> 00:25:54,129 Cunts! 271 00:26:02,428 --> 00:26:05,129 - Buenos días. - Buenos días. 272 00:26:06,095 --> 00:26:08,262 Give me three packs today, honey. 273 00:26:18,361 --> 00:26:20,295 Here you go, keep the change. 274 00:26:24,727 --> 00:26:26,427 Are you okay? 275 00:26:26,626 --> 00:26:28,127 I don't know. 276 00:26:31,361 --> 00:26:34,628 You know, Juan Wayne's birthday is on Saturday. 277 00:26:35,159 --> 00:26:36,258 Oh, yeah? 278 00:26:36,260 --> 00:26:40,327 We're gonna have a big fiesta, with a bouncy house, 279 00:26:40,759 --> 00:26:43,260 pinata, mariachis, and lots of food. 280 00:26:44,693 --> 00:26:46,395 Mariachis, huh? 281 00:26:50,659 --> 00:26:52,194 Do you want to come? 282 00:26:53,493 --> 00:26:55,127 To the fiesta? 283 00:26:55,593 --> 00:26:57,094 Saturday. 284 00:26:58,559 --> 00:27:00,157 And where is it? 285 00:27:00,159 --> 00:27:04,557 It's at my home. You know where the school is? 286 00:27:04,559 --> 00:27:05,592 Yeah. 287 00:27:05,594 --> 00:27:07,661 It's the yellow house right behind the school. 288 00:27:08,058 --> 00:27:09,326 Oh, yeah. 289 00:27:10,426 --> 00:27:14,391 Well, let's keep it on the burner, okay? 290 00:27:14,393 --> 00:27:16,326 Okay. 291 00:27:17,125 --> 00:27:19,526 Gracias. Adios. 292 00:27:20,225 --> 00:27:23,126 And now we're bringing it over to you, Lisa. 293 00:27:23,759 --> 00:27:25,160 What is the answer to the question? 294 00:27:26,258 --> 00:27:31,026 Is it April 16, 1746, the Battle of Culloden? 295 00:27:31,326 --> 00:27:33,324 The answer to that question... 296 00:27:33,326 --> 00:27:35,390 we'll have to wait until tomorrow. 297 00:27:35,392 --> 00:27:36,724 Thank you for joining us... 298 00:27:36,726 --> 00:27:40,027 and we'll see you all tomorrow on Make a Guess. 299 00:28:42,591 --> 00:28:44,425 Hey, man, how you doing? 300 00:28:48,090 --> 00:28:49,291 Okay. 301 00:28:50,990 --> 00:28:54,588 Hey, uh, I was just thinking about something... 302 00:28:54,590 --> 00:28:56,624 I wanted to share with you, man. 303 00:28:59,323 --> 00:29:02,588 You got a minute? Yeah. 304 00:29:02,590 --> 00:29:07,290 When I was a kid living in Kentucky, I had this BB gun. 305 00:29:08,356 --> 00:29:10,024 It didn't shoot straight. 306 00:29:12,156 --> 00:29:16,124 So I was out one day shooting at things, trees, leaves. 307 00:29:18,589 --> 00:29:23,323 And there was a mockingbird up in a tree singing his heart out. 308 00:29:26,022 --> 00:29:27,256 And... 309 00:29:28,489 --> 00:29:32,555 I aimed my gun just to scare him away, pulled the trigger... 310 00:29:35,089 --> 00:29:37,257 and the singing stopped. 311 00:29:41,090 --> 00:29:44,256 It was the saddest moment in my whole life. 312 00:29:47,023 --> 00:29:52,423 The silence it cast in the world was devastating. 313 00:29:59,988 --> 00:30:03,955 I haven't thought about that bird since I was a kid. 314 00:30:08,255 --> 00:30:09,589 I know. 315 00:30:12,621 --> 00:30:14,223 All right. 316 00:30:15,988 --> 00:30:17,421 Thanks, man. 317 00:30:54,087 --> 00:30:55,987 You been watching Deal or no Deal? 318 00:30:57,187 --> 00:30:59,318 Are you kidding, it makes no sense. 319 00:30:59,320 --> 00:31:02,218 Come on, man, you gotta give it a second chance. 320 00:31:02,220 --> 00:31:07,051 It is... Listen, listen, check it out. 321 00:31:07,053 --> 00:31:13,084 You start with 50 briefcases, right, held by 50 hot chicks. 322 00:31:13,086 --> 00:31:17,085 Right? And inside each briefcase, all 50, 323 00:31:17,087 --> 00:31:20,084 is a number and that number is how much money 324 00:31:20,086 --> 00:31:23,518 you're gonna win if you open that case. 325 00:31:23,520 --> 00:31:26,218 So you choose one case at the beginning of the game 326 00:31:26,220 --> 00:31:28,617 that you're gonna open up at the end of the game. 327 00:31:28,619 --> 00:31:31,517 And then you systematically open up all the briefcases 328 00:31:31,519 --> 00:31:33,018 and the hot chicks show you 329 00:31:33,020 --> 00:31:34,452 how much money you could have won. 330 00:31:34,454 --> 00:31:37,151 And the whole time, there's this hidden guy 331 00:31:37,153 --> 00:31:38,583 and he's sitting off stage 332 00:31:38,585 --> 00:31:41,284 and he's offering to buy the case that you chose. 333 00:31:41,286 --> 00:31:42,717 So by the end of the game, 334 00:31:42,719 --> 00:31:45,483 you've opened up all the cases except two. 335 00:31:45,485 --> 00:31:47,986 And you have to decide whether to take the money 336 00:31:49,017 --> 00:31:51,051 from the hidden guy, the money that's already in your case 337 00:31:51,053 --> 00:31:53,018 or the case that you haven't chosen yet. 338 00:31:53,020 --> 00:31:55,017 But you don't know what's in your case... 339 00:31:55,019 --> 00:31:59,152 or the case you haven't chosen, until you actually open it. 340 00:32:00,452 --> 00:32:02,451 So a guy picks a case 341 00:32:02,453 --> 00:32:05,984 and I've gotta wait a fucking hour to see what's in it? 342 00:32:05,986 --> 00:32:07,387 Yeah. 343 00:32:08,385 --> 00:32:11,386 It's a convoluted piece of shit. 344 00:32:25,384 --> 00:32:28,218 Lucky, how you doing, buddy? 345 00:32:28,752 --> 00:32:31,053 I haven't a clue, man. 346 00:32:31,351 --> 00:32:32,983 Someone's in a mood. 347 00:32:32,985 --> 00:32:35,652 Leave him be. He'll snap out of it. Right, pal? 348 00:32:36,250 --> 00:32:38,318 - Two more cases? - Yeah, that'll do. 349 00:32:38,718 --> 00:32:41,615 - If you want, I can... - Watch me lift stuff? 350 00:32:41,617 --> 00:32:44,919 Can I help it if I have a strong mind, but a weak back? 351 00:32:46,517 --> 00:32:47,619 Sit. 352 00:32:56,317 --> 00:33:01,083 I know that look. Used to see it all the time. You know where? 353 00:33:01,085 --> 00:33:04,748 In the mirror, my reflection staring back at me. 354 00:33:04,750 --> 00:33:06,215 And then he met Elaine. 355 00:33:06,217 --> 00:33:08,052 Hey, who's telling the story? 356 00:33:08,451 --> 00:33:10,551 I'm sorry, but it hasn't exactly been un-told. 357 00:33:10,984 --> 00:33:14,048 I've told this? You've heard this before from me? When? 358 00:33:14,050 --> 00:33:16,450 All the time, that's when. I bet he's heard it, too. 359 00:33:16,717 --> 00:33:18,549 I've told this? You've heard this? 360 00:33:18,551 --> 00:33:21,114 Ungatz. 361 00:33:21,116 --> 00:33:23,950 Holy shit, that's right! Ungatz. 362 00:33:24,183 --> 00:33:26,150 Nothing. I was nothing. 363 00:33:26,350 --> 00:33:28,281 - You were a bum. - I was a bum. 364 00:33:28,283 --> 00:33:30,181 I had no plans. I had no ambitions. 365 00:33:30,183 --> 00:33:32,015 - A two-bit hustler. - That was me. 366 00:33:32,017 --> 00:33:33,584 - And you knew it. - I did. 367 00:33:34,016 --> 00:33:38,015 I'd look into the mirror and all I'd see was ungatz. 368 00:33:38,017 --> 00:33:39,918 I hated myself. 369 00:33:41,749 --> 00:33:44,583 - And then what happened? - You met Elaine. 370 00:33:45,083 --> 00:33:47,981 Jesus, I can't believe it, you really listen to me. 371 00:33:47,983 --> 00:33:51,015 That's amazing. 372 00:33:51,017 --> 00:33:54,982 Anyway, I met... I met this fantastic woman. 373 00:33:54,984 --> 00:33:59,547 And she met a bum, a deadbeat. Did she try to change me? No. 374 00:33:59,549 --> 00:34:02,416 Did she expect me to change myself? No. 375 00:34:02,682 --> 00:34:05,683 - She accepted me for who I was. - Who you are. 376 00:34:06,148 --> 00:34:10,182 Who I am. I'm still ungatz, nothing. 377 00:34:10,415 --> 00:34:14,949 But I've got everything. Isn't that something? 378 00:34:15,248 --> 00:34:16,981 Something for you. 379 00:34:16,983 --> 00:34:19,647 No, what I'm trying to say is, if this could happen, 380 00:34:19,649 --> 00:34:22,647 you know, to me, then it could happen to anyone. 381 00:34:22,649 --> 00:34:24,047 Even you. 382 00:34:24,049 --> 00:34:26,415 Bullshit. 383 00:34:41,248 --> 00:34:43,282 Jesus Christ. 384 00:34:43,614 --> 00:34:45,546 I think we can just get by 385 00:34:45,548 --> 00:34:48,212 with a will and a medical power of attorney. 386 00:34:48,214 --> 00:34:50,682 Howard, where have you been? I've been waiting for you. 387 00:34:52,449 --> 00:34:53,546 Who's this? 388 00:34:53,548 --> 00:34:57,048 Hey, Lucky. This here is my attorney Bobby Lawrence. 389 00:34:57,247 --> 00:34:59,048 Nice to meet you, Lucky. 390 00:35:00,314 --> 00:35:03,081 You know why sharks don't eat attorneys? 391 00:35:03,449 --> 00:35:05,012 Uh... 392 00:35:05,014 --> 00:35:06,915 Professional courtesy. 393 00:35:08,248 --> 00:35:11,216 Right, that's an oldie but a goodie. 394 00:35:12,714 --> 00:35:15,311 So did you come here to help find Roosevelt? 395 00:35:15,313 --> 00:35:18,012 No, he's here to help me with my plan. 396 00:35:18,014 --> 00:35:19,045 What plan? 397 00:35:19,047 --> 00:35:20,514 End-of-life plan. 398 00:35:21,113 --> 00:35:22,679 Are you dying? 399 00:35:22,681 --> 00:35:25,346 No, he's just preparing for the unexpected. 400 00:35:25,348 --> 00:35:27,015 What's unexpected? 401 00:35:28,715 --> 00:35:32,578 Well, I mean, none of us make it out of this thing alive. 402 00:35:32,580 --> 00:35:35,211 So, knowing that, it'd be a sin not to prepare 403 00:35:35,213 --> 00:35:36,980 for the well-being of your loved ones. 404 00:35:42,213 --> 00:35:44,478 What loved ones do you have, anyway? 405 00:35:44,480 --> 00:35:47,410 When I go, I want to leave all my possessions 406 00:35:47,412 --> 00:35:48,980 to President Roosevelt. 407 00:35:50,080 --> 00:35:52,011 Your turtle? 408 00:35:52,013 --> 00:35:54,378 - Well, you know, this might not - Tortoise! 409 00:35:54,380 --> 00:35:57,445 And he's still got at least 100 years left in him. 410 00:35:57,447 --> 00:35:59,177 A hundred years? 411 00:35:59,179 --> 00:36:00,645 Yeah. 412 00:36:00,647 --> 00:36:02,444 You know, Lucky, you remind me... 413 00:36:02,446 --> 00:36:04,179 Shut the fuck up! 414 00:36:11,346 --> 00:36:12,980 Okay. 415 00:36:21,546 --> 00:36:23,514 Didn't Roosevelt just run away? 416 00:36:24,346 --> 00:36:28,213 Yeah, but this is for, you know, when he comes back. 417 00:36:29,145 --> 00:36:30,710 Is he a homing turtle? 418 00:36:30,712 --> 00:36:32,576 Tortoise. And no, he's not. 419 00:36:32,578 --> 00:36:36,113 He's gone, Howard, and you're all alone. 420 00:36:36,346 --> 00:36:39,277 We come in alone, and we go out alone. 421 00:36:39,279 --> 00:36:40,577 That's awfully bleak. 422 00:36:40,579 --> 00:36:44,209 It's beautiful. 423 00:36:44,211 --> 00:36:48,076 "Alone" comes from two words, all-one. 424 00:36:48,078 --> 00:36:49,577 It's in the dictionary. 425 00:36:49,579 --> 00:36:51,109 I miss him! 426 00:36:51,111 --> 00:36:53,512 It'll be okay, Howie. 427 00:36:53,713 --> 00:36:56,045 A tortoise is an amazing creature, Lucky. 428 00:36:56,478 --> 00:37:00,345 They're as noble as a king, and as kindhearted as a grandmother. 429 00:37:01,011 --> 00:37:06,009 I miss my friend, his company. I miss his personality. 430 00:37:06,011 --> 00:37:08,377 He's not missing, Howard. He's just not here. 431 00:37:08,379 --> 00:37:10,608 He's there, wherever the fuck that is. 432 00:37:10,610 --> 00:37:13,176 And if he's not there, then he's nowhere. 433 00:37:13,178 --> 00:37:15,243 Well, I'm sure he's okay. 434 00:37:15,245 --> 00:37:17,109 Why don't you go fuck yourself? 435 00:37:17,111 --> 00:37:18,179 Oh! 436 00:37:19,410 --> 00:37:21,311 You don't give a shit about him. You're here to suck him dry. 437 00:37:22,712 --> 00:37:25,444 You lamprey, leach, vulture. 438 00:37:26,077 --> 00:37:28,008 Con him out of his last dime, 439 00:37:28,010 --> 00:37:29,743 just to leave everything to a turtle. 440 00:37:29,745 --> 00:37:32,611 Tortoise! He's a tortoise! 441 00:37:33,344 --> 00:37:35,508 You know that saguaro near your yard? 442 00:37:35,510 --> 00:37:38,444 That thing was barely a twig when Roosevelt was born. 443 00:37:39,010 --> 00:37:40,674 They're contemporaries, you know? 444 00:37:40,676 --> 00:37:42,545 They watched each other grow up. 445 00:37:45,243 --> 00:37:48,708 President Roosevelt was born in a hole in the desert. 446 00:37:48,710 --> 00:37:51,443 At that time, a little creature smaller than my thumb. 447 00:37:52,643 --> 00:37:56,042 And something clicked inside that little Roosevelt brain, 448 00:37:56,044 --> 00:37:59,945 and he scampered up out of that hole and faced the world. 449 00:38:01,543 --> 00:38:03,944 You all think of a tortoise as something slow. 450 00:38:04,643 --> 00:38:07,912 But I think about the burden he has to carry on his back. 451 00:38:08,710 --> 00:38:11,040 Yeah, it's for protection. 452 00:38:11,042 --> 00:38:14,910 But ultimately, it's the coffin he's gonna get buried in 453 00:38:15,344 --> 00:38:18,645 and he has to drag that thing around his entire life? 454 00:38:19,743 --> 00:38:23,211 Go ahead and laugh, but he affected me. 455 00:38:24,377 --> 00:38:28,110 You know what I'm saying? He affected me. 456 00:38:28,575 --> 00:38:30,441 There are some things in this universe, 457 00:38:30,443 --> 00:38:32,975 ladies and gentlemen, that are bigger than all of us. 458 00:38:32,977 --> 00:38:35,943 And a tortoise is one of 'em! 459 00:38:48,642 --> 00:38:50,376 You asshole. 460 00:38:53,041 --> 00:38:55,606 I want to teach you a lesson. 461 00:38:55,608 --> 00:38:58,142 Lucky! No fighting in my bar, goddammit! 462 00:38:58,342 --> 00:38:59,974 Then we'll take it outside. 463 00:38:59,976 --> 00:39:01,243 Seriously, Lucky? 464 00:39:01,475 --> 00:39:05,409 You know, Mr... Mr. Lucky... I don't think... 465 00:39:05,675 --> 00:39:07,442 You don't think I can take you? 466 00:39:08,443 --> 00:39:11,474 I fought the fucking Japs! You don't think I can take you? 467 00:39:11,476 --> 00:39:14,609 No. I don't think it's a good idea... for you. 468 00:39:15,976 --> 00:39:19,376 Outside. Five minutes. Fisticuffs. 469 00:39:20,008 --> 00:39:22,110 - Lucky... - Five minutes! 470 00:39:24,507 --> 00:39:26,141 Lucky... 471 00:39:27,341 --> 00:39:28,508 Lucky! 472 00:39:34,675 --> 00:39:36,172 Is he coming out? 473 00:39:36,174 --> 00:39:39,006 Are you kidding? He doesn't wanna fight you. 474 00:39:39,008 --> 00:39:40,706 I wouldn't want to fight me, either, pal. 475 00:39:40,708 --> 00:39:44,973 Easy, Lash LaRue. Let him live this time, okay? 476 00:39:44,975 --> 00:39:48,238 Forty years ago, I wouldn't have given him a fuckin' option. 477 00:39:48,240 --> 00:39:51,308 Forty years ago, he'd a been in diapers. 478 00:39:53,174 --> 00:39:55,674 Forget about him! Okay? 479 00:39:57,506 --> 00:39:58,507 Okay. 480 00:40:11,140 --> 00:40:12,541 Where you going? 481 00:40:19,206 --> 00:40:20,642 Go home, Lucky. 482 00:40:36,240 --> 00:40:37,908 Paulie? 483 00:45:27,299 --> 00:45:28,900 Hey, there! 484 00:45:30,133 --> 00:45:31,466 How ya' doing? 485 00:45:32,632 --> 00:45:34,266 How did you get here? 486 00:45:35,066 --> 00:45:36,396 I... drove? 487 00:45:36,398 --> 00:45:38,130 How did you know where I live? 488 00:45:38,132 --> 00:45:40,499 - Everybody knows where you live. - They do? 489 00:45:40,966 --> 00:45:43,366 This is a tiny town. Don't you know where I live? 490 00:45:45,432 --> 00:45:46,667 Yeah, over by the church? 491 00:45:47,965 --> 00:45:49,100 There you go. 492 00:45:50,232 --> 00:45:52,266 So, what do you want? 493 00:45:52,966 --> 00:45:54,463 Well, I was worried about you 494 00:45:54,465 --> 00:45:56,332 so I thought I'd come by and check on you. 495 00:45:58,599 --> 00:46:02,200 You're welcome. Nice outfit there, cowboy. 496 00:46:07,531 --> 00:46:09,465 Thanks for coming by. 497 00:46:23,565 --> 00:46:27,463 Jesus Christ. How'd you get in here? I thought you'd left. 498 00:46:27,465 --> 00:46:30,633 I'm sorry, I knocked, the door was unlocked. 499 00:46:31,331 --> 00:46:32,998 You scared me to death. 500 00:46:36,731 --> 00:46:38,999 You were such a cute, little boy. 501 00:46:40,030 --> 00:46:45,031 Oh, and such a handsome young man in uniform. 502 00:46:48,496 --> 00:46:51,931 This photo at the beach, are these your kids? 503 00:46:52,396 --> 00:46:53,898 No. 504 00:46:55,464 --> 00:46:57,062 Were you ever married? 505 00:46:57,064 --> 00:47:00,265 No... were you? 506 00:47:01,997 --> 00:47:03,131 No. 507 00:47:06,264 --> 00:47:08,128 You got somewhere to be, sailor? 508 00:47:08,130 --> 00:47:09,930 Uh... no. 509 00:47:13,697 --> 00:47:15,364 Do you like game shows? 510 00:47:18,230 --> 00:47:19,898 Do you smoke grass? 511 00:47:23,730 --> 00:47:25,064 ♪ Hey ♪ 512 00:47:35,297 --> 00:47:37,264 This isn't a game show. 513 00:47:37,696 --> 00:47:38,930 It's ended. 514 00:47:42,130 --> 00:47:43,330 ♪ Hey ♪ 515 00:47:51,562 --> 00:47:55,464 This... he is amazing. Who is this? 516 00:47:55,996 --> 00:47:58,160 Liberace. Didn't you ever hear of him? 517 00:47:58,162 --> 00:48:02,631 Yes, I've heard of him, he's wonderful. 518 00:48:03,496 --> 00:48:06,261 I feel like such an asshole. 519 00:48:06,263 --> 00:48:08,629 When this guy first came on the scene, 520 00:48:09,695 --> 00:48:12,562 I wrote him off as just another extravagant fruit. 521 00:48:14,262 --> 00:48:17,162 If you stop and listen to him, you'll see he's brilliant! 522 00:48:17,561 --> 00:48:20,559 And I don't know how the hell he plays with all those rings 523 00:48:20,561 --> 00:48:23,296 on his fingers, that's even more impressive. 524 00:48:24,662 --> 00:48:26,363 Look at him. 525 00:48:28,095 --> 00:48:30,096 And I don't know why I ever gave a shit 526 00:48:30,294 --> 00:48:32,896 about who he was screwing in the first place. 527 00:48:34,462 --> 00:48:37,396 If he was getting laid, more power to him. 528 00:48:41,696 --> 00:48:44,162 Hmm, I can hardly get it up anymore. 529 00:48:47,194 --> 00:48:50,095 I hope I didn't leave anybody out. 530 00:48:51,128 --> 00:48:54,192 Oh, we did leave out somebody. All you kids... 531 00:48:54,194 --> 00:48:56,359 Oh, shit, I gotta go. I'm late. 532 00:48:56,361 --> 00:48:59,129 I gotta get back to the diner. Joe is going to kill me. 533 00:49:01,695 --> 00:49:03,461 All right. 534 00:49:12,593 --> 00:49:14,494 Bunch of liars. 535 00:49:17,027 --> 00:49:18,292 I'll see you later. 536 00:49:18,294 --> 00:49:20,462 - Okay. - Okay, bye. 537 00:49:21,226 --> 00:49:22,894 - Hey. - Yeah? 538 00:49:24,226 --> 00:49:26,194 Can I tell you a secret? 539 00:49:26,961 --> 00:49:28,295 Absolutely. 540 00:49:29,626 --> 00:49:32,660 You won't tell anyone? 541 00:49:40,261 --> 00:49:42,027 I'm scared. 542 00:49:47,427 --> 00:49:49,093 I know. 543 00:49:51,660 --> 00:49:53,294 I know. 544 00:50:24,425 --> 00:50:27,225 Did you ever think about before you were born? 545 00:50:28,492 --> 00:50:32,894 No, never did. What are you talking about? 546 00:50:34,426 --> 00:50:35,993 New beginning. 547 00:50:38,592 --> 00:50:42,557 Is that in the crossword today? 548 00:50:42,559 --> 00:50:47,523 No. I was just thinking about something that happened to me 549 00:50:47,525 --> 00:50:51,525 when I was about 12 or 13 years old. 550 00:50:52,359 --> 00:50:53,959 - Oh, yeah? - Yeah. 551 00:50:56,158 --> 00:50:58,658 I was at my Aunt Beulah's house, alone. 552 00:50:59,024 --> 00:51:00,591 I don't remember why. 553 00:51:02,457 --> 00:51:06,391 And only once, I got this anxiety attack. 554 00:51:06,692 --> 00:51:08,655 I panicked and I was scared to death. 555 00:51:08,657 --> 00:51:10,722 I started thinking there's nothing out there. 556 00:51:10,724 --> 00:51:13,091 It's all black, there's nothing. 557 00:51:14,691 --> 00:51:18,091 And I was scared shitless, man. 558 00:51:19,625 --> 00:51:21,255 At 13? 559 00:51:21,257 --> 00:51:22,591 Yeah. 560 00:51:26,525 --> 00:51:28,291 What happened? 561 00:51:29,591 --> 00:51:32,958 I don't know, my aunt came back and that was the end of it. 562 00:51:37,490 --> 00:51:39,222 Hey, Bob, how we doing? 563 00:51:39,224 --> 00:51:41,057 Little bit worse, I'd be perfect. 564 00:51:41,291 --> 00:51:43,057 Sit anywhere you like. 565 00:51:52,057 --> 00:51:55,587 Hey, you know what, Joe? I'll just take a coffee to go. 566 00:51:55,589 --> 00:51:56,588 Oh, okay. 567 00:51:56,590 --> 00:52:00,024 Well, I got a pot brewing. It'll be a minute. 568 00:52:01,323 --> 00:52:02,657 All right. 569 00:52:08,557 --> 00:52:12,424 Morning... hi. 570 00:52:14,223 --> 00:52:15,623 Howdy. 571 00:52:17,990 --> 00:52:20,057 Goddamn asshole. 572 00:52:20,389 --> 00:52:25,556 Uh, so no, uh... no sign of The President yet. 573 00:52:26,556 --> 00:52:28,954 I hope he turns up soon, for Howard's sake. 574 00:52:28,956 --> 00:52:31,021 The two of them are like heterosexual life partners. 575 00:52:31,023 --> 00:52:35,624 Only one thing worse than awkward silence... small talk. 576 00:52:40,690 --> 00:52:42,891 Okay, I hear you. 577 00:52:58,288 --> 00:53:00,223 So you doing okay? 578 00:53:01,688 --> 00:53:03,022 Fragile. 579 00:53:03,454 --> 00:53:04,955 Uh-oh. 580 00:53:07,022 --> 00:53:08,956 Why is that? 581 00:53:09,387 --> 00:53:10,989 I fell down. 582 00:53:11,689 --> 00:53:14,588 Ooh, yeah, yeah, that's... that's bad. 583 00:53:15,120 --> 00:53:17,055 Yup. It rung my bell. 584 00:53:21,521 --> 00:53:25,385 A couple years ago, I was heading 585 00:53:25,387 --> 00:53:27,352 to my daughter's school to pick her up. 586 00:53:27,354 --> 00:53:29,952 And as I'm turning around the corner, you know, 587 00:53:29,954 --> 00:53:32,521 going to the parking lot, there's a garbage truck that... 588 00:53:33,321 --> 00:53:35,889 I mean, just barely missed me. 589 00:53:36,521 --> 00:53:39,018 There was no more room between my car and that truck 590 00:53:39,020 --> 00:53:41,052 than between me and this tie. 591 00:53:41,054 --> 00:53:45,587 A half a second... a half a second made all the difference. 592 00:53:48,321 --> 00:53:50,484 Two minutes later, my daughter hops into the car 593 00:53:50,486 --> 00:53:52,654 as if nothing's happened, and... 594 00:53:54,155 --> 00:53:56,154 I guess nothing has. 595 00:53:57,387 --> 00:53:59,254 But, uh... 596 00:54:03,986 --> 00:54:06,220 it really shook me to the core. 597 00:54:09,054 --> 00:54:12,455 Yeah, I got hair standing up on my arms just thinking about it. 598 00:54:15,019 --> 00:54:16,518 Here we go, Bob. 599 00:54:16,520 --> 00:54:17,620 Oh, thank you. 600 00:54:18,521 --> 00:54:20,421 Gratis, counselor. 601 00:54:20,986 --> 00:54:22,254 Thanks, Joe. 602 00:54:23,686 --> 00:54:25,354 Do you mind if I sit down? 603 00:54:27,253 --> 00:54:28,321 Well, sit down. 604 00:54:31,453 --> 00:54:33,420 Do you have any kids, Lucky? 605 00:54:34,653 --> 00:54:37,053 None that I'm totally sure of, no. 606 00:54:38,520 --> 00:54:41,021 - You married? - Never been married. 607 00:54:41,320 --> 00:54:42,520 Ever in love? 608 00:54:44,319 --> 00:54:45,586 Yeah, I guess so. 609 00:54:46,119 --> 00:54:49,520 Ah, so it goes, huh? Hm. 610 00:54:54,153 --> 00:54:56,220 Well, "The future's not ours to see." 611 00:54:57,585 --> 00:55:00,086 Hell, I've made a whole career out of that. 612 00:55:00,584 --> 00:55:02,217 Wills and trusts, you know, 613 00:55:02,219 --> 00:55:04,318 it's about planning for things that you can't foresee. 614 00:55:04,320 --> 00:55:05,583 Just because you can't see 'em... 615 00:55:05,585 --> 00:55:08,017 doesn't mean they're not gonna happen. 616 00:55:08,019 --> 00:55:09,317 It is written. 617 00:55:09,319 --> 00:55:11,452 Mm-hm, somewhere. 618 00:55:14,418 --> 00:55:17,052 You know, I came home with my daughter that day... 619 00:55:17,551 --> 00:55:19,486 and I sat down, I made a will. 620 00:55:19,986 --> 00:55:23,219 I wrote end-of-life directives, I upped my life insurance. 621 00:55:23,652 --> 00:55:25,952 I paid up front for my cremation. 622 00:55:27,052 --> 00:55:29,151 So now, if something happens to me... 623 00:55:34,686 --> 00:55:37,353 When something happens to me... 624 00:55:38,084 --> 00:55:42,218 my family doesn't have to worry about the bureaucracy of death. 625 00:55:43,451 --> 00:55:44,518 You know? 626 00:55:46,018 --> 00:55:48,418 They just call one number 627 00:55:49,017 --> 00:55:51,149 and my body's gone by the end of the day, 628 00:55:51,151 --> 00:55:53,183 and they don't have to worry about anything 629 00:55:53,185 --> 00:55:54,716 for the rest of their life. 630 00:55:54,718 --> 00:55:58,616 Well, this doesn't change anything for you, this scenario. 631 00:55:58,618 --> 00:55:59,952 Why not? 632 00:56:00,483 --> 00:56:02,019 You're still dead. 633 00:57:05,149 --> 00:57:09,049 How are you doin'? Hey, how you doing, sweetheart? 634 00:57:14,949 --> 00:57:16,947 Hey, Lucky. 635 00:57:16,949 --> 00:57:18,713 What's her name? 636 00:57:18,715 --> 00:57:20,249 Fiona. 637 00:57:20,682 --> 00:57:23,884 Hey, Fiona, you're a fine cut of a dog. 638 00:57:24,083 --> 00:57:25,514 Yeah. 639 00:57:25,516 --> 00:57:27,280 Do you have any pets? No. 640 00:57:27,282 --> 00:57:29,447 You ever think about adopting one? 641 00:57:29,449 --> 00:57:30,413 No. 642 00:57:30,415 --> 00:57:32,916 I got plenty inside who need a forever home. 643 00:57:33,282 --> 00:57:35,446 A what? What's a forever home? 644 00:57:35,448 --> 00:57:37,279 That's when someone adopts an animal 645 00:57:37,281 --> 00:57:39,283 and then they have a permanent place to live. 646 00:57:40,615 --> 00:57:42,249 Nothing is permanent. 647 00:57:43,449 --> 00:57:45,282 Come inside, I'll show you around. 648 00:57:52,580 --> 00:57:54,712 It's like the wild kingdom in here. 649 00:57:54,714 --> 00:57:56,980 Aren't they beautiful? 650 00:57:56,982 --> 00:57:59,116 Yeah, and loud. 651 00:58:05,180 --> 00:58:07,012 Do you have any mockingbirds? 652 00:58:07,014 --> 00:58:09,012 No, but I can order you one. 653 00:58:09,014 --> 00:58:10,281 No, thanks. 654 00:58:18,315 --> 00:58:20,179 Are these tortoises? 655 00:58:20,181 --> 00:58:22,112 No, they're baby turtles. 656 00:58:22,114 --> 00:58:25,449 Huh. My friend Howard's tortoise ran away. 657 00:58:25,646 --> 00:58:27,145 Oh, no. 658 00:58:27,147 --> 00:58:31,378 Yeah... he said they could live to be 100 years. 659 00:58:31,380 --> 00:58:34,379 Oh, absolutely. In some cases, I've heard of 200 years. 660 00:58:34,381 --> 00:58:36,112 - Oh, really? - Yeah. 661 00:58:36,114 --> 00:58:37,414 Wow. 662 00:58:41,681 --> 00:58:44,614 - And what are these? - Crickets. 663 00:58:45,414 --> 00:58:47,377 Can you adopt these, as well? 664 00:58:47,379 --> 00:58:50,181 No. People buy them to feed their reptiles. 665 00:58:50,413 --> 00:58:51,647 Oh. 666 01:00:42,210 --> 01:00:44,912 Good morning, darling. Anywhere you like. 667 01:00:59,310 --> 01:01:02,977 - Marines, huh? - Yes, sir. 668 01:01:04,444 --> 01:01:06,910 - You? - Navy. 669 01:01:07,244 --> 01:01:12,110 Oh, okay, okay. You guys are great. 670 01:01:12,476 --> 01:01:14,943 You always gave us a lift to the fight. 671 01:01:17,076 --> 01:01:19,409 I read somewhere where the Marines didn't have the 672 01:01:19,411 --> 01:01:20,407 the mental capacity 673 01:01:20,409 --> 01:01:23,443 to understand the inner workings of a ship. 674 01:01:25,342 --> 01:01:27,044 World War II, huh? 675 01:01:28,210 --> 01:01:29,376 Pacific. 676 01:01:30,609 --> 01:01:33,209 Yeah, same here. Did you ever get around the Philippines? 677 01:01:35,276 --> 01:01:38,878 Yeah, I spent a couple years in that slice of heaven. 678 01:01:39,243 --> 01:01:43,040 Yeah, me, too, but I never got off the boat. 679 01:01:43,042 --> 01:01:44,443 Consider yourself lucky. 680 01:01:46,510 --> 01:01:48,274 Can I get you a cup of coffee? 681 01:01:48,276 --> 01:01:50,040 Yes, please, black. 682 01:01:50,042 --> 01:01:51,476 Mm-hm. 683 01:01:51,942 --> 01:01:53,441 A piece of that apple pie? 684 01:01:53,443 --> 01:01:55,607 Absolutely. You want that warmed up? 685 01:01:55,609 --> 01:01:57,174 - No. - All right. 686 01:01:57,176 --> 01:01:58,377 Thank you, though. 687 01:02:04,108 --> 01:02:06,976 Well, uh, mind if I come over and join you? 688 01:02:08,675 --> 01:02:11,642 No. Come on over here. 689 01:02:19,441 --> 01:02:21,106 Fred Sparks. 690 01:02:21,108 --> 01:02:22,243 They call me Lucky. 691 01:02:23,974 --> 01:02:25,075 I was a cook. 692 01:02:26,308 --> 01:02:28,940 On paper, that's supposed to be the easiest job in the Navy. 693 01:02:28,942 --> 01:02:30,973 That's why they called me Lucky. 694 01:02:30,975 --> 01:02:32,276 What were you riding in? 695 01:02:32,942 --> 01:02:34,509 L-S-T. 696 01:02:35,640 --> 01:02:39,073 Landing Ship Tank, right? 697 01:02:39,075 --> 01:02:42,508 We called it a large, slow target. 698 01:02:43,142 --> 01:02:46,538 We were hauling ammunition for the big battleships. 699 01:02:46,540 --> 01:02:49,176 More like riding a stick of dynamite. 700 01:02:50,975 --> 01:02:53,341 You ever get a ship shot out from underneath you? 701 01:02:54,108 --> 01:02:56,639 Almost once. 702 01:02:56,641 --> 01:02:59,239 Every day in the evening glare, 703 01:02:59,241 --> 01:03:03,306 the suicide planes came in low over the water, 704 01:03:03,308 --> 01:03:06,874 with the sun behind them, to hit our ships. 705 01:03:07,074 --> 01:03:10,507 So one day, this suicide plane was coming 706 01:03:11,006 --> 01:03:14,007 right towards our ammunition ship. 707 01:03:14,308 --> 01:03:20,641 And all at once, about 100 yards away, it went up into the air... 708 01:03:21,007 --> 01:03:23,141 and slid back down into the water. 709 01:03:24,040 --> 01:03:26,341 Some of our small arms fire had hit the pilot. 710 01:03:26,572 --> 01:03:28,105 Lucky shot. 711 01:03:28,107 --> 01:03:29,340 Not for the pilot. 712 01:03:31,207 --> 01:03:33,941 Did you go straight to the Philippines from boot camp? 713 01:03:35,240 --> 01:03:38,304 No, we stopped in Tarawa and Okinawa on the way, 714 01:03:38,306 --> 01:03:40,338 just to show them what fer. 715 01:03:40,340 --> 01:03:43,207 Tarawa, Jesus Christ. 716 01:03:44,539 --> 01:03:47,304 - Here you go. - Oh, thank you, dear. 717 01:03:47,306 --> 01:03:49,973 - You're welcome. - Thank you very much. 718 01:03:53,206 --> 01:03:55,470 I still think about those people on the islands, 719 01:03:55,472 --> 01:03:58,006 hiding away in caves, afraid of us. 720 01:03:59,307 --> 01:04:03,606 The Japs said that we were going to rape and kill them all. 721 01:04:07,040 --> 01:04:09,339 So, we secured the beach 722 01:04:10,338 --> 01:04:12,570 and the locals who survived 723 01:04:12,572 --> 01:04:14,472 that goddamn fire fight, 724 01:04:15,538 --> 01:04:18,404 start throwing their children off the cliffs, 725 01:04:18,406 --> 01:04:20,874 and then following them. 726 01:04:21,606 --> 01:04:25,573 I guess they thought suicide was better than facing us. 727 01:04:27,238 --> 01:04:28,939 I remember this little girl, 728 01:04:29,272 --> 01:04:32,473 couldn't have been more than seven, in rags. 729 01:04:34,673 --> 01:04:36,670 I don't know, she saw us coming, I guess, 730 01:04:36,672 --> 01:04:40,905 and right out of nowhere, out of a hole or wherever it was... 731 01:04:41,238 --> 01:04:43,273 and she had this... 732 01:04:43,538 --> 01:04:49,006 God, this beautiful smile on her face. 733 01:04:49,339 --> 01:04:52,469 And it wasn't a facade, it was coming from somewhere inside, 734 01:04:52,471 --> 01:04:54,973 from the center of herself. 735 01:04:55,437 --> 01:04:58,168 Good Lord, in that shit hole, 736 01:04:58,170 --> 01:05:00,438 something like that really stands out. 737 01:05:02,104 --> 01:05:03,703 It stopped us in our track. 738 01:05:03,705 --> 01:05:06,372 Here we were, all covered with shit, 739 01:05:06,671 --> 01:05:10,636 pieces of people everywhere, and I couldn't see a tree left. 740 01:05:10,638 --> 01:05:13,372 And she's grinning from ear to ear. 741 01:05:14,704 --> 01:05:16,904 So I said to my corpsman, I said, 742 01:05:17,471 --> 01:05:20,038 "Look at this, we got somebody who's happy to see us." 743 01:05:21,337 --> 01:05:25,570 And he said, "She's not happy to see you. She's a Buddhist. 744 01:05:25,937 --> 01:05:27,935 She thinks she's gonna be killed, 745 01:05:27,937 --> 01:05:30,437 and she's smiling at her fate." 746 01:05:33,404 --> 01:05:35,702 When I think about that little girl's beautiful face, 747 01:05:35,704 --> 01:05:37,404 and that smile, 748 01:05:38,236 --> 01:05:40,634 in the midst of all that horror, 749 01:05:40,636 --> 01:05:42,871 and how she summoned... 750 01:05:45,470 --> 01:05:47,103 joy. 751 01:05:51,536 --> 01:05:54,437 They don't make a medal for that kind of bravery. 752 01:07:37,135 --> 01:07:39,534 Hi, Lucky. I brought you some flan. 753 01:07:40,168 --> 01:07:42,699 - I made it myself. - Oh, thank you. 754 01:07:42,701 --> 01:07:45,698 And this is my mother, Victoria. 755 01:07:45,700 --> 01:07:49,200 She speaks a little English. Lucky. 756 01:07:49,567 --> 01:07:50,935 Hola. 757 01:07:51,167 --> 01:07:52,564 Nice to meet you, darling. 758 01:07:52,566 --> 01:07:54,131 Mucho gusto. 759 01:07:54,133 --> 01:07:56,067 Bueno, I'll be right back, okay? 760 01:07:58,134 --> 01:08:03,468 Now, um, what does the name Victoria mean in English? 761 01:08:04,099 --> 01:08:05,997 Victory. 762 01:08:05,999 --> 01:08:12,165 Victory, ah, Che Guevara said, "Hasta la victoria siempre." 763 01:08:12,167 --> 01:08:13,997 Se hablo Espanol? 764 01:12:58,160 --> 01:12:59,425 Lucky! 765 01:12:59,427 --> 01:13:01,428 One of you will betray me. 766 01:13:01,927 --> 01:13:04,493 Bullshit. We'll all betray you. 767 01:13:07,026 --> 01:13:09,193 You look peppy. Where have you been? 768 01:13:09,492 --> 01:13:12,626 Ah, to a fiesta. Did you ever have flan? 769 01:13:13,225 --> 01:13:14,192 No. 770 01:13:15,093 --> 01:13:17,392 I love it. It has an unusual consistency. 771 01:13:18,926 --> 01:13:22,327 Howie, you find that reptile of yours yet? 772 01:13:23,125 --> 01:13:25,259 No, but thank you for asking. 773 01:13:26,659 --> 01:13:28,626 It's okay, I've let it go. 774 01:13:29,392 --> 01:13:32,257 I kept thinking about how much time he spent 775 01:13:32,259 --> 01:13:33,893 planning his escape. 776 01:13:34,525 --> 01:13:37,859 And how much care he took in making sure I couldn't find him. 777 01:13:39,059 --> 01:13:42,024 And then I started to realize that he wasn't leaving me. 778 01:13:42,026 --> 01:13:43,622 He was just going off someplace else 779 01:13:43,624 --> 01:13:46,259 to do something he thought was important. 780 01:13:46,592 --> 01:13:49,893 I even felt guilty for standing in his way for so long. 781 01:13:51,624 --> 01:13:54,192 So I stopped looking for him. 782 01:13:55,325 --> 01:13:58,522 If it's meant to be, I'll see him again. 783 01:13:58,524 --> 01:14:02,225 He knows where I am, and I'm leaving the gate open. 784 01:14:06,457 --> 01:14:08,458 To Roosevelt! 785 01:14:19,058 --> 01:14:21,323 Hey! What, the rules don't apply to you? 786 01:14:21,325 --> 01:14:23,554 Since when did you think you could smoke in here? 787 01:14:23,556 --> 01:14:25,355 Well, you could in '68. 788 01:14:25,357 --> 01:14:28,024 Well, it ain't '68 anymore, sweetheart. 789 01:14:34,958 --> 01:14:37,491 One of these days, I'm just going to light up. 790 01:14:46,357 --> 01:14:49,621 My place, my rules. 791 01:14:49,623 --> 01:14:51,290 Ownership is a fallacy. 792 01:14:51,657 --> 01:14:54,254 Why can't you just live by the rules? 793 01:14:54,256 --> 01:14:57,687 Authority is arbitrary and subjective. 794 01:14:57,689 --> 01:14:59,688 This is the same kind of attitude 795 01:14:59,690 --> 01:15:02,123 that got you 86-ed from Eve's. 796 01:15:03,689 --> 01:15:06,455 - What do you know of it? - I know you lit up. 797 01:15:06,457 --> 01:15:07,988 That's what you think happened. 798 01:15:07,990 --> 01:15:10,388 If you didn't light up, why did they kick you out? 799 01:15:10,390 --> 01:15:12,687 They didn't kick me out, I walked out. 800 01:15:12,689 --> 01:15:14,453 That's a good story. 801 01:15:14,455 --> 01:15:15,655 I like that story. 802 01:15:15,657 --> 01:15:17,320 It's not a story. 803 01:15:17,322 --> 01:15:19,420 - Then what is it? - It's the truth. 804 01:15:19,422 --> 01:15:22,354 The truth is, you lit up! 805 01:15:22,356 --> 01:15:24,454 It's not about the cigarettes, 806 01:15:24,456 --> 01:15:28,521 it's about what I know happened, and what you think happened. 807 01:15:28,523 --> 01:15:29,590 I wish I had been there. 808 01:15:30,188 --> 01:15:32,287 You could have been there and still have missed it. 809 01:15:32,289 --> 01:15:35,456 You broke the rules. You got busted and banned. 810 01:15:35,656 --> 01:15:37,086 That's the truth. 811 01:15:37,088 --> 01:15:39,520 Look, how about if we all agree to disagree? 812 01:15:39,522 --> 01:15:42,956 No. I know the truth and the truth matters! 813 01:15:45,056 --> 01:15:46,556 It's a thing. Right? 814 01:15:49,088 --> 01:15:52,453 Yes, truth is a thing. 815 01:15:52,455 --> 01:15:57,289 It's the truth of who we are and what we do. 816 01:15:57,555 --> 01:16:01,619 And you have to face that, and accept it. 817 01:16:01,621 --> 01:16:05,255 Because the truth of the universe is waiting. 818 01:16:09,022 --> 01:16:10,920 I'm lost. 819 01:16:10,922 --> 01:16:13,989 The truth of what is, for all of us. 820 01:16:14,289 --> 01:16:16,189 Which is... 821 01:16:18,421 --> 01:16:22,289 That it's all going to go away. 822 01:16:23,922 --> 01:16:28,588 You, you, you, you, me, this cigarette, everything 823 01:16:29,654 --> 01:16:32,422 into blackness, the void. 824 01:16:34,587 --> 01:16:37,021 And nobody's in charge. 825 01:16:38,154 --> 01:16:40,155 And you're left with... 826 01:16:42,253 --> 01:16:43,921 ungatz. 827 01:16:46,253 --> 01:16:47,652 Ungatz. 828 01:16:47,654 --> 01:16:49,088 Nothing. 829 01:16:49,521 --> 01:16:55,055 Nothing. That's... that's all there is. 830 01:16:58,288 --> 01:16:59,985 And what do you do with that? 831 01:16:59,987 --> 01:17:01,255 What do we do with that? 832 01:17:10,954 --> 01:17:12,554 You smile.