1
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Subtitles by demonseye

2
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Get your bag off the table.
People eat there.

3
00:01:27,745 --> 00:01:29,266
They eat on plates.

4
00:01:29,289 --> 00:01:31,305
Don't give me crap,
Maizy.

5
00:01:31,442 --> 00:01:33,191
I'm telling.
You said "crap".

6
00:01:33,316 --> 00:01:37,069
- There's nothing wrong with "crap".
- Oh, really? I thought that was a swear.

7
00:01:37,852 --> 00:01:40,023
- No, you're thinking of "shit".
- Oh, right.

8
00:01:43,327 --> 00:01:45,203
Do you mind?

9
00:01:45,329 --> 00:01:48,249
A sixth-grader chased me
with his bike and I was running.

10
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When I got exhausted and fell down,
he waled me with his shoe.

11
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- Then thank your parents for that.
- How come?

12
00:01:54,505 --> 00:01:56,549
It was their brilliant idea
to move here.

13
00:01:56,633 --> 00:01:59,010
They weren't making enough cash
in Indianapolis.

14
00:01:59,136 --> 00:02:00,929
Forget that we were
perfectly happy.

15
00:02:01,013 --> 00:02:03,557
So thank them for getting treated
like shit every day.

16
00:02:03,640 --> 00:02:07,144
- I'm telling on that one.
- Shut your face.

17
00:02:12,358 --> 00:02:16,112
- Your book bag doesn't go on the floor.
- Always have a cow.

18
00:02:17,906 --> 00:02:20,667
Your nails are digging
into my arm, goddamn it!

19
00:02:20,667 --> 00:02:21,659
Pick it up!

20
00:02:23,302 --> 00:02:25,246
You're just supposed
to open the door for us.

21
00:02:25,330 --> 00:02:27,290
You're not supposed
to kick us around.

22
00:02:27,592 --> 00:02:29,918
I'm an American.
I have rights!

23
00:02:30,002 --> 00:02:31,878
Maizy,
did I kick you around?

24
00:02:32,004 --> 00:02:35,341
No, but you said "shit" twice.
But only once for real.

25
00:02:36,300 --> 00:02:39,849
I've got better things to do
than baby-sit you, you little stain.

26
00:02:39,884 --> 00:02:43,314
Oh, like what, hang out
with friends you don't have?

27
00:02:43,314 --> 00:02:46,034
Why don't you just shut up?

28
00:02:46,069 --> 00:02:47,611
Wanna make me?

29
00:02:48,536 --> 00:02:53,317
When our mother figure
isn't here, I'm in charge.

30
00:02:53,819 --> 00:02:56,603
- I'm sick of you calling her that.
- Too bad.

31
00:02:58,699 --> 00:03:00,532
You moron!

32
00:03:00,869 --> 00:03:04,261
I don't know why we need boys
at all. They're so loud.

33
00:03:04,261 --> 00:03:05,653
Shut up!

34
00:03:05,688 --> 00:03:08,293
- Shut up yourself!
- We need boys...

35
00:03:08,713 --> 00:03:13,442
so they can grow up, get married
and turn into shadows.

36
00:03:15,550 --> 00:03:17,583
Let the dog out.

37
00:03:17,618 --> 00:03:19,716
Percy!

38
00:03:32,569 --> 00:03:37,345
This is such a wonderful dinner, mother.
How do you find the time?

39
00:03:40,683 --> 00:03:41,839
Miles.

40
00:03:43,038 --> 00:03:44,824
Maizy, put that down.

41
00:03:45,543 --> 00:03:49,706
- Did you win at hockey yesterday?
- Hockey's been over for two weeks.

42
00:03:54,718 --> 00:03:57,579
I guess you don't want a hockey stick
for your birthday.

43
00:04:04,319 --> 00:04:05,722
Hmm, you know what?

44
00:04:07,064 --> 00:04:12,055
When dad goes to New York,
I'm going to take a week off work.

45
00:04:12,090 --> 00:04:13,738
So you can interview
new housekeepers?

46
00:04:15,031 --> 00:04:18,733
- I've had enough of your ugliness.
- Oh, really?

47
00:04:20,453 --> 00:04:23,923
We're all just a little tired
of the act.

48
00:04:39,098 --> 00:04:41,851
- This is really a good idea.
- Thank you.

49
00:04:42,977 --> 00:04:45,519
- How's the pie?
- Not bad.

50
00:04:47,231 --> 00:04:48,935
You gonna be at work
in the morning?

51
00:04:50,442 --> 00:04:52,276
I don't see how
I can avoid it.

52
00:04:52,621 --> 00:04:54,512
You don't seem very happy
about it.

53
00:04:55,407 --> 00:04:58,824
All right. If you gotta know,
I'm really not that excited

54
00:04:58,824 --> 00:05:00,203
about going to work
for my girlfriend.

55
00:05:00,203 --> 00:05:01,789
There, I said it.
It's out of the way.

56
00:05:03,063 --> 00:05:04,965
Okay, okay.
Buck, I love you.

57
00:05:04,965 --> 00:05:07,888
I can't help myself. I wanna get
married, I wanna have a family.

58
00:05:07,888 --> 00:05:09,449
I wanna do it with you.

59
00:05:09,484 --> 00:05:11,366
You know,
the clock is ticking away here.

60
00:05:11,366 --> 00:05:14,849
I would just like to hear
the pitter-patter of tiny feet before I die.

61
00:05:15,119 --> 00:05:18,042
I'll get you a mouse
and a... piece of sheet metal.

62
00:05:19,879 --> 00:05:22,246
- Come on, lighten up, will you?
- Ah, don't push my button.

63
00:05:22,246 --> 00:05:23,408
I'm not getting into this.

64
00:05:23,408 --> 00:05:25,864
I'm not pushing your button.
This is... I know me.

65
00:05:25,898 --> 00:05:27,142
I know what I like.

66
00:05:27,490 --> 00:05:30,361
All right? I like... my friends,
I like my freedom.

67
00:05:31,529 --> 00:05:33,910
I like knowing I can throw my sticks
in the trunk of my car

68
00:05:33,910 --> 00:05:36,147
and go golfing
anytime I want.

69
00:05:36,182 --> 00:05:38,662
I-I don't hurt anybody. I dont...
I don't see what the problem is.

70
00:05:38,787 --> 00:05:41,916
That is the best formula
for loneliness I ever heard.

71
00:05:42,374 --> 00:05:45,188
- Why are we arguing?
- We're talkin'.

72
00:05:45,223 --> 00:05:47,716
I said I'd be at work
in the morning. I'll be there.

73
00:05:48,964 --> 00:05:50,351
Okay.

74
00:05:53,762 --> 00:05:56,078
I... I-I... I just...
I just gotta get this out.

75
00:05:56,078 --> 00:05:58,212
I mean, I know I'm kinda
like harpin' on somethin' here,

76
00:05:58,212 --> 00:05:59,805
but, you know,
j-just let me say it.

77
00:05:59,805 --> 00:06:01,725
I mean, you know, I am...
I'm workin' on history,

78
00:06:01,725 --> 00:06:02,629
I'm workin' on the past.

79
00:06:02,629 --> 00:06:04,770
You're gonna show up for work?
You swear to God?

80
00:06:04,770 --> 00:06:08,556
- In the a.m.? Promise?
- Chanice, I'll be honest with you.

81
00:06:08,652 --> 00:06:12,527
If I could think of an excuse
that you would buy, I'd use it.

82
00:06:27,672 --> 00:06:28,939
Hello.

83
00:06:33,262 --> 00:06:35,931
- Oh, God!
- What?

84
00:06:36,014 --> 00:06:38,475
Just a second.
It's your aunt.

85
00:06:38,559 --> 00:06:40,205
What happened?

86
00:06:40,686 --> 00:06:42,813
Your dad had a heart attack.

87
00:06:47,027 --> 00:06:48,507
Who's gonna watch the kids?

88
00:06:50,572 --> 00:06:53,282
Marcie.
She's right across the street.

89
00:06:53,310 --> 00:06:55,911
She's the last person
I'd ask for a favor.

90
00:06:58,080 --> 00:06:59,971
What about the, uh, Nevilles?

91
00:07:02,782 --> 00:07:04,304
Would you call 'em?

92
00:07:04,629 --> 00:07:06,607
I wanna leave
as soon as we can.

93
00:07:08,967 --> 00:07:11,055
I am so helpless here.

94
00:07:11,427 --> 00:07:14,421
Honey, now don't start
getting down on why we moved.

95
00:07:15,265 --> 00:07:17,392
It has nothing to do
with what happened.

96
00:07:17,517 --> 00:07:18,567
Sorry.

97
00:07:21,813 --> 00:07:23,894
Yeah. This is just a thought.

98
00:07:24,108 --> 00:07:27,729
What about Buck?
I'm sure he'd be glad to help out.

99
00:07:28,310 --> 00:07:30,538
This is not the time
to discuss your brother.

100
00:07:30,538 --> 00:07:34,090
- I don't want him here.
- It's just a suggestion.

101
00:07:34,354 --> 00:07:37,788
He doesn't have kids. He isn't married.
He-he doesn't even work!

102
00:07:39,706 --> 00:07:44,187
He's a little out there,
but he's responsible and he's family.

103
00:07:44,289 --> 00:07:49,143
Buck is not the kind of guy
I feel comfortable leaving my kids with.

104
00:07:49,635 --> 00:07:55,139
The trashy people he hangs out with?
That-that woman who... sells tires?

105
00:07:55,417 --> 00:07:59,438
The... horse racing, the gambling...
Can you see him in this house?

106
00:08:00,128 --> 00:08:00,980
Okay.

107
00:08:04,901 --> 00:08:06,802
Call the Nevilles.

108
00:08:11,367 --> 00:08:13,538
Are we going
to Indianapolis?

109
00:08:14,203 --> 00:08:16,313
Daddy and I are.

110
00:08:16,497 --> 00:08:18,329
And we're not?

111
00:08:19,292 --> 00:08:21,819
No, I... I don't think
that would be a good idea.

112
00:08:24,130 --> 00:08:26,100
Thanks.

113
00:08:26,357 --> 00:08:28,834
I loved my father
very much.

114
00:08:28,996 --> 00:08:31,599
So, why did you
move away from him?

115
00:08:34,391 --> 00:08:38,367
If my whole family moved away
from me, I'd have a heart attack too.

116
00:08:44,861 --> 00:08:46,208
Ah, I see.

117
00:08:48,687 --> 00:08:51,201
- Who's gonna take care of us?
- Mr. And Mrs. Neville.

118
00:08:51,326 --> 00:08:54,121
- Is that a joke?
- You don't like the Nevilles?

119
00:08:54,204 --> 00:08:57,540
- The dog's a ball sniffer.
- Don't talk like that.

120
00:08:57,624 --> 00:08:59,454
Mr. Neville yelled
at Michael Larson

121
00:08:59,454 --> 00:09:01,938
because their dog
was sniffing Michael's balls.

122
00:09:01,938 --> 00:09:04,125
- Don't use that word.
- I don't know another word.

123
00:09:04,160 --> 00:09:06,592
I'm sure we can talk
to Mr. Neville about the dog.

124
00:09:06,676 --> 00:09:09,762
Sorry, honey.
They're in Florida.

125
00:09:12,543 --> 00:09:16,029
Okay. You get in bed.
You have to get up for school.

126
00:09:16,978 --> 00:09:19,194
- Who's in Florida?
- Just get back in bed.

127
00:09:19,606 --> 00:09:23,334
- What's the other word for balls?
- Get in bed.

128
00:09:26,243 --> 00:09:27,473
Nuts.

129
00:09:30,994 --> 00:09:32,572
What do we do?

130
00:09:32,818 --> 00:09:34,977
I don't think
we have much choice.

131
00:09:36,856 --> 00:09:38,367
Can we trust 'im?

132
00:09:41,206 --> 00:09:44,439
- Yeah?
- Buck, this is Bob.

133
00:09:44,484 --> 00:09:47,706
Bob? Bob who?

134
00:09:50,028 --> 00:09:52,265
Buck, i-i-it's your brother.

135
00:09:53,559 --> 00:09:57,731
Bobby! Bobby!
Hang on a minute.

136
00:10:19,130 --> 00:10:21,046
Bobby. I just used
your Christmas present.

137
00:10:21,130 --> 00:10:22,948
Ah. The Clapper.

138
00:10:22,948 --> 00:10:26,293
Bob, you little pissant,
how you doing, huh?

139
00:10:27,053 --> 00:10:29,179
Geez!
What, are you drunk?

140
00:10:30,996 --> 00:10:32,319
<i>Hey, you know something?</i>

141
00:10:32,354 --> 00:10:36,413
We gotta get together. I haven't been
over your house since you moved in.

142
00:10:36,887 --> 00:10:39,805
<i>Hey, I-I-I'm real sorry
about those bushes too.</i>

143
00:10:39,805 --> 00:10:43,259
I had no idea that
they will catch on fire like that.

144
00:10:43,947 --> 00:10:46,783
You know, you were right. I should never
have put the barbecue that close.

145
00:10:47,361 --> 00:10:50,593
Buck, Cindy's father
had a heart attack tonight.

146
00:10:51,093 --> 00:10:54,041
<i>We'd like to get down to Indianapolis
as soon as possible.</i>

147
00:10:54,076 --> 00:10:56,668
But, uh, well, we have
a problem with the kids.

148
00:10:56,793 --> 00:10:58,484
We're stuck for somebody
to watch them.

149
00:10:59,469 --> 00:11:01,050
I-if you're not doing anything...

150
00:11:01,050 --> 00:11:04,421
Is this, uh, okay with Cindy?
This has got her approval on 'em?

151
00:11:05,196 --> 00:11:06,530
Oh, yeah.

152
00:11:06,530 --> 00:11:10,067
Well, that'd be great.
That'll... I'd be honored. Sure.

153
00:11:10,067 --> 00:11:11,650
You... I've still got
the one bedroom.

154
00:11:11,650 --> 00:11:13,546
You know, I'm gonna get
a bigger place, but, uh...

155
00:11:13,645 --> 00:11:15,803
Hey, they bring their, uh,
sleeping bags over here.

156
00:11:15,803 --> 00:11:16,531
We'll have some fun.

157
00:11:16,531 --> 00:11:19,510
We'll make tents and stuff...
Get some toys and peanut butter.

158
00:11:19,545 --> 00:11:22,576
- You know, we'll have a blast.
- Uh... I thought you could come here.

159
00:11:22,611 --> 00:11:26,943
- Uh, the kids... have school.
- What am I thinking about? Sure. Uh...

160
00:11:26,943 --> 00:11:28,910
Do we wanna do this tonight
or in the morning?

161
00:11:28,910 --> 00:11:31,184
Tonight would be best,
I mean if you could do it.

162
00:11:31,219 --> 00:11:34,654
Yeah, tonight will be fine.
That'll be fine. Don't worry about it.

163
00:11:34,654 --> 00:11:37,075
I'll, uh, pack a few things,
I'm on my way.

164
00:11:37,075 --> 00:11:39,129
Thanks. See you soon.

165
00:11:41,258 --> 00:11:45,853
He can do it.
He was asleep and... I woke him up.

166
00:11:47,097 --> 00:11:51,350
At this hour, that's a good sign.
We're all set.

167
00:11:59,318 --> 00:12:01,862
Okay, this, this and this.

168
00:12:06,076 --> 00:12:09,487
Bag, bag, bag. Okay.

169
00:12:09,955 --> 00:12:11,463
Yeah, this will do.

170
00:12:23,759 --> 00:12:24,389
Hello.

171
00:12:24,389 --> 00:12:26,416
Chanice? Honey?

172
00:12:27,807 --> 00:12:31,142
- Honey, I have some bad news.
- Let me guess.

173
00:12:32,062 --> 00:12:34,272
You are not coming in to work
in the morning.

174
00:12:38,193 --> 00:12:38,839
Just le...

175
00:12:41,364 --> 00:12:43,456
No, but... You don't...

176
00:12:43,491 --> 00:12:46,089
Would you just...?
Give me...

177
00:12:46,661 --> 00:12:48,536
Let me get...
Let me get...

178
00:12:49,289 --> 00:12:51,366
You're not...
Give me a...

179
00:12:52,584 --> 00:12:54,100
Good-bye.

180
00:12:57,172 --> 00:12:59,861
Oh, boy, those kids,
I haven't seen those kids in a while.

181
00:13:01,927 --> 00:13:03,795
Tia's gotta be nine.

182
00:13:04,165 --> 00:13:06,991
Nine, maybe ten.
Oh, boy.

183
00:13:07,517 --> 00:13:09,400
And the two new ones.
They're, uh...

184
00:13:10,770 --> 00:13:12,563
Larry and, uh...

185
00:13:13,981 --> 00:13:15,357
Larry and, uh...

186
00:13:17,861 --> 00:13:19,279
Betsy.

187
00:13:19,363 --> 00:13:20,822
Betsy...

188
00:13:22,282 --> 00:13:24,371
Jennifer. Jennifer.

189
00:13:24,576 --> 00:13:26,787
Larry and Jennifer.
Nice kids.

190
00:13:32,567 --> 00:13:36,655
Honey, he's 40 years old.
He knows his way around.

191
00:13:37,048 --> 00:13:42,386
Look. Why don't you go finish packing?
You know, I'll-I'll watch out for Buck.

192
00:14:04,398 --> 00:14:07,791
What the hell?
Where is everybody?

193
00:14:16,548 --> 00:14:19,767
Bob. Bob?

194
00:14:21,679 --> 00:14:24,765
This isn't funny.
Come on. Wake up!

195
00:14:24,891 --> 00:14:29,020
- I'm freezing my ass off out here.
- Oh, shit!

196
00:14:29,546 --> 00:14:31,478
Come on,
I'm getting mad, Bob.

197
00:14:33,653 --> 00:14:35,790
- Yo, Bobby?!
- Buck?

198
00:14:35,790 --> 00:14:37,272
- Bob?
- Buck!

199
00:14:37,272 --> 00:14:38,805
- Bob?
- Buck!

200
00:14:37,380 --> 00:14:40,866
- Bob?
- Over here!

201
00:14:49,000 --> 00:14:52,414
Do you have any idea how many big
white houses there are on this street?

202
00:14:53,196 --> 00:14:55,486
- Shh!
- What?

203
00:14:55,966 --> 00:14:58,203
- Keep it down.
- What?

204
00:14:58,594 --> 00:15:02,097
- What do you want me to do with my car?
- For crying out loud!

205
00:15:02,810 --> 00:15:03,765
Sorry, Mr. Hatfield.

206
00:15:03,849 --> 00:15:05,913
It's 2:00 a.m.!

207
00:15:06,060 --> 00:15:08,966
How you doing?
Hey, sorry I'm late.

208
00:15:08,966 --> 00:15:12,065
- Oh, no. Thanks for coming.
- What happened to the moustache?

209
00:15:12,149 --> 00:15:14,443
- Oh, uh, I had to shave it off.
- How's Cindy?

210
00:15:14,528 --> 00:15:16,488
- Not well, not well.
- Her dad?

211
00:15:16,571 --> 00:15:17,146
Hard to say.

212
00:15:17,146 --> 00:15:20,328
Those medical terms, huh? What is it,
an infarction or something like that?

213
00:15:28,834 --> 00:15:31,822
- Hey, I-I stopped smoking cigarettes.
- Oh, good.

214
00:15:31,822 --> 00:15:33,049
Isn't that somethin'?

215
00:15:33,923 --> 00:15:36,842
I'm on to cigars now.
I'm on a five-year plan.

216
00:15:36,968 --> 00:15:39,635
I eliminated the cigarettes,
then I go to cigars, then I go to pipes,

217
00:15:39,635 --> 00:15:42,682
then I go to chewing tobacco,
then I'm on to that nicotine gum.

218
00:15:43,683 --> 00:15:46,839
- Good.
- Yeah.

219
00:15:47,890 --> 00:15:48,592
Uh, money.

220
00:15:48,852 --> 00:15:52,960
- I'll leave you blank checks.
- Oh, no, no, please, I-I've got lots of money.

221
00:15:53,040 --> 00:15:55,023
- No.
- No, please.

222
00:15:55,323 --> 00:15:55,964
No.

223
00:15:55,964 --> 00:15:58,407
I got the money, please.
I'd like to do this.

224
00:15:58,490 --> 00:16:00,951
All right? So, uh...
No, come on, will you, please?

225
00:16:01,077 --> 00:16:02,935
I'll pay you back
when we get home.

226
00:16:07,401 --> 00:16:09,794
I-I won't have
any problem cashing, uh,

227
00:16:09,794 --> 00:16:12,477
a second-party
out-of-state paycheck, will I?

228
00:16:12,798 --> 00:16:15,145
The reason I'm saying is
I've been so busy lately,

229
00:16:15,145 --> 00:16:17,393
I haven't been able
to do my banking and, uh...

230
00:16:17,495 --> 00:16:18,412
I don't think there'll be a problem,
don't worry about it.

231
00:16:18,412 --> 00:16:20,306
Let me... just leave you
the checks.

232
00:16:20,507 --> 00:16:23,302
- Well, only if it's comfortable for you.
- That'll be easier.

233
00:16:23,434 --> 00:16:26,200
I guess, sure.
Do you have a plunger here?

234
00:16:26,235 --> 00:16:30,023
While I'm thinking of these things, uh...
For the morning, you know.

235
00:16:30,023 --> 00:16:33,243
My plumbing is just so bad. Of course,
yours is a good plumbing here, right?

236
00:16:33,416 --> 00:16:35,405
Yeah, I would imagine.
Don't worry about it.

237
00:16:35,489 --> 00:16:38,241
You know, everything will be fine.
Just been bound up lately.

238
00:16:38,367 --> 00:16:39,992
It's-it's-it's driving me crazy.

239
00:16:39,992 --> 00:16:41,733
I've been eating
a lot of cheese for some reason.

240
00:16:41,733 --> 00:16:43,754
I don't know what it is,
I got a craving for the stuff.

241
00:16:44,611 --> 00:16:46,590
Think maybe
that's an allergy or somethin'?

242
00:16:47,251 --> 00:16:48,455
Yeah.

243
00:16:48,462 --> 00:16:52,563
I don't know, I can't get enough cheese.
I feel like a... big mouse.

244
00:16:54,092 --> 00:16:56,469
- I don't know.
- Oh, well. Oh, well.

245
00:16:56,553 --> 00:17:00,617
Let's see.
Oh! Oh, Miles' birthday.

246
00:17:00,932 --> 00:17:02,868
I forget that.
We'll be back by that time.

247
00:17:03,686 --> 00:17:05,896
Okay, then.
This should do.

248
00:17:05,980 --> 00:17:09,650
I probably won't use 'em.
You know, just in case.

249
00:17:09,775 --> 00:17:12,069
- Right.
- Great. Okay.

250
00:17:20,801 --> 00:17:21,442
Here we go.

251
00:17:21,455 --> 00:17:24,249
I know I've forgotten something.
What else? What else? What else?

252
00:17:24,333 --> 00:17:28,545
All right? Okay, that looks nice.
Hey, give me your arm.

253
00:17:29,949 --> 00:17:32,466
It-it should only be a few days. I promise
I'll call you. I'll call you tomorrow.

254
00:17:32,592 --> 00:17:34,885
- You've got all the phone numbers?
- Yeah.

255
00:17:35,169 --> 00:17:36,963
- We're off.
- Take care of yourself.

256
00:17:36,963 --> 00:17:38,574
- Thanks a lot, Buck.
- Okay. All right.

257
00:17:38,609 --> 00:17:41,559
- We really appreciate this.
- Thanks. Thank you.

258
00:17:41,643 --> 00:17:43,680
- Say hi to your dad for me.
- You can do it.

259
00:17:43,680 --> 00:17:44,353
- Drive safely.
- Okay.

260
00:17:44,353 --> 00:17:45,388
- All right?
- Thanks.

261
00:17:45,388 --> 00:17:46,715
Okay.

262
00:18:10,979 --> 00:18:12,483
Oh, that's for sure.

263
00:18:27,442 --> 00:18:28,818
Unbreakable.

264
00:18:35,576 --> 00:18:37,123
Shit!

265
00:18:38,995 --> 00:18:40,871
It's 7:02 in the a.m.

266
00:18:40,997 --> 00:18:43,291
You're listening to
W-I-Don't-Have-To-Go-To-Work-Today,

267
00:18:43,376 --> 00:18:45,252
brought to you by
Kobolowski Tires.

268
00:18:45,378 --> 00:18:47,671
For the best in tires,
see Chanice Kobolowski.

269
00:19:19,364 --> 00:19:20,248
Tia!

270
00:19:23,757 --> 00:19:26,253
You remember me?

271
00:19:29,675 --> 00:19:31,700
Uncle Buck.

272
00:19:31,844 --> 00:19:33,720
The Uncle Buck.

273
00:19:42,230 --> 00:19:44,273
Coffee drinker, huh?

274
00:19:59,623 --> 00:20:01,538
- Hungry?
- No.

275
00:20:01,538 --> 00:20:04,426
Oh, come on. Sure you are.
Everybody loves breakfast.

276
00:20:04,901 --> 00:20:06,198
You gotta have
a good breakfast.

277
00:20:06,198 --> 00:20:07,891
Start the day off right.

278
00:20:12,680 --> 00:20:16,016
- So, where are the other ones?
- Other ones what?

279
00:20:16,601 --> 00:20:18,400
The, uh, the other kids.

280
00:20:18,529 --> 00:20:22,762
They have names.
Miles and Maizy.

281
00:20:23,306 --> 00:20:25,099
Are Miles and Maizy up yet?

282
00:20:25,134 --> 00:20:26,885
I woke them,
thank you.

283
00:20:30,407 --> 00:20:31,825
There you go.

284
00:20:31,908 --> 00:20:34,035
Are you deaf?
I said I wasn't hungry.

285
00:20:34,119 --> 00:20:35,995
That's one
of my specialties.

286
00:20:40,751 --> 00:20:42,294
I'd rather starve,
thank you.

287
00:20:42,800 --> 00:20:45,063
Does your mom know
you drink coffee?

288
00:20:45,464 --> 00:20:48,536
I'm not doing it
to impress you.

289
00:20:48,676 --> 00:20:50,636
I appreciate that.

290
00:20:52,347 --> 00:20:54,974
Is there any particular reason why
you're giving me such a hard time?

291
00:20:56,851 --> 00:21:01,967
- Am I giving you a hard time?
- Uh, well, I don't know.

292
00:21:03,400 --> 00:21:05,777
- Hey! How you doin'?
- Who are you?

293
00:21:06,580 --> 00:21:08,068
I'm your uncle Buck.

294
00:21:08,364 --> 00:21:11,206
- Do I have an uncle?
- Unfortunately.

295
00:21:12,614 --> 00:21:14,178
Holy smokes!

296
00:21:14,244 --> 00:21:16,248
He's cooking our garbage.

297
00:21:22,629 --> 00:21:25,007
Hey, where's your, uh,
your sister, um...

298
00:21:25,090 --> 00:21:27,221
- Her name is Maizy.
- Maizy.

299
00:21:27,537 --> 00:21:31,191
- For the second time.
- Sorry.

300
00:21:33,640 --> 00:21:37,921
You must be hungry.
Just for you.

301
00:21:38,563 --> 00:21:43,030
Oh, my God!
He put onions in the eggs.

302
00:21:43,329 --> 00:21:44,961
I'm gonna
go check on Maizy.

303
00:21:45,242 --> 00:21:48,222
I'll fix you some cereal
when I get back.

304
00:22:04,382 --> 00:22:06,592
- Can I ask you something?
- What?

305
00:22:08,083 --> 00:22:09,830
Is your sister always
this pleasant?

306
00:22:09,830 --> 00:22:13,272
No, she's usually in a bad mood
in the morning.

307
00:22:16,623 --> 00:22:19,262
- You want knots in your hair?
- Ow!

308
00:22:19,262 --> 00:22:20,079
Cut it out.

309
00:22:20,114 --> 00:22:22,901
- I want mom to do it.
- Mom's not here.

310
00:22:23,027 --> 00:22:24,903
- She is too.
- No, she's not.

311
00:22:25,029 --> 00:22:28,366
- She and dad went to Indianapolis.
- They did not.

312
00:22:28,450 --> 00:22:30,910
- Okay, they didn't.
- They did?

313
00:22:30,994 --> 00:22:33,746
Yes. And I'm taking
care of you.

314
00:22:33,872 --> 00:22:36,077
But you can't drive.

315
00:22:38,043 --> 00:22:39,727
- Where do you live?
- In the city.

316
00:22:39,795 --> 00:22:40,915
- Do you have a house?
- Apartment.

317
00:22:40,915 --> 00:22:42,089
- Own or rent?
- Rent.

318
00:22:42,124 --> 00:22:43,673
- What do you do for a living?
- Lots of things.

319
00:22:43,799 --> 00:22:45,327
- Where's your office?
- I don't have one.

320
00:22:45,327 --> 00:22:46,843
- How come?
- I don't need one.

321
00:22:46,843 --> 00:22:48,020
- Where's your wife?
- Don't have one.

322
00:22:48,020 --> 00:22:49,622
- How come?
-  It's a long story.

323
00:22:49,622 --> 00:22:50,992
- Do you have kids?
- No, I don't.

324
00:22:50,992 --> 00:22:52,618
- How come?
- It's an even longer story.

325
00:22:52,618 --> 00:22:53,683
Are you my dad's brother?

326
00:22:53,683 --> 00:22:55,966
What's your record for
consecutive questions asked?

327
00:22:55,966 --> 00:22:58,222
- Thirty-eight.
- I'm your dad's brother all right.

328
00:22:58,231 --> 00:23:00,646
You have much more hair
in your nose than my dad.

329
00:23:00,646 --> 00:23:02,944
- How nice of you to notice.
- I'm a kid. That's my job.

330
00:23:37,458 --> 00:23:38,669
That's my car.

331
00:24:01,035 --> 00:24:02,621
Tying your shoe?

332
00:24:08,846 --> 00:24:10,682
What time do you want me
to pick you up after school?

333
00:24:11,458 --> 00:24:13,631
Don't bother.
I'll get a ride with friends.

334
00:24:13,631 --> 00:24:15,897
Ah, no, no, I got my orders.
What time?

335
00:24:16,564 --> 00:24:19,109
Are you really this stupid?
I said I would get a ride.

336
00:24:19,234 --> 00:24:20,591
I always get a ride.

337
00:24:20,986 --> 00:24:24,072
Hey, I'll just call the school, find out
what time and I'll meet you right here.

338
00:24:24,531 --> 00:24:27,410
Go ahead, call the school.
I won't be here.

339
00:24:27,668 --> 00:24:30,954
Stand me up today,
and tomorrow...

340
00:24:31,038 --> 00:24:33,332
I'll drive you to school
in my robe and pyjamas

341
00:24:33,332 --> 00:24:35,735
and walk you
to your first class.

342
00:24:36,211 --> 00:24:41,075
- 4 o'clock okay?
- I'm stunned that I'm related to you.

343
00:24:41,925 --> 00:24:45,120
You get the pole out of your keister,
we're gonna get along just fine.

344
00:24:47,681 --> 00:24:51,086
Did you ever have anyone
embarrass you like this?

345
00:24:59,518 --> 00:25:00,481
No.

346
00:25:18,130 --> 00:25:20,664
- You think she hates me?
- With a passion.

347
00:25:20,664 --> 00:25:23,853
- Really? You think it's the hat?
- No.

348
00:25:23,853 --> 00:25:24,918
No?

349
00:25:24,953 --> 00:25:29,461
A lot of people hate this hat. It angers
a lot of people, just the sight of it.

350
00:25:29,810 --> 00:25:33,063
I'll tell you a story about that
on the way to school.

351
00:25:37,651 --> 00:25:39,768
Uh-huh, yeah, right.
Listen, Buck.

352
00:25:39,803 --> 00:25:43,646
For eight years you have been
making plans and breaking plans.

353
00:25:43,681 --> 00:25:45,157
What are you
talking about, huh?

354
00:25:45,785 --> 00:25:49,460
Didn't we talk last night...
didn't we talk last night, huh, about this?

355
00:25:49,831 --> 00:25:52,956
What did we talk about?
Me... playing the father!

356
00:25:52,956 --> 00:25:55,520
Uh, mm-hmm. I'm really glad
that you can do it for your brother.

357
00:25:55,520 --> 00:25:57,105
You sure as hell
can't do it for me.

358
00:25:57,866 --> 00:25:59,921
How could I do it for you?
We don't have kids.

359
00:26:00,537 --> 00:26:01,975
<i>What are you talking about?</i>

360
00:26:02,111 --> 00:26:05,850
Buck, I know you think the job
is pointless

361
00:26:05,850 --> 00:26:08,695
and in some way I'm tryin'
to manipulate you and control you

362
00:26:08,695 --> 00:26:11,297
- and ruin your life.
- No...

363
00:26:11,902 --> 00:26:14,012
Look.
I have to fill the position.

364
00:26:14,012 --> 00:26:16,164
It's important to the company,
it's important to me.

365
00:26:16,164 --> 00:26:17,304
I'm swamped down here.

366
00:26:17,304 --> 00:26:20,572
Now, unless you tell me different,
I'm gonna offer the job to somebody else.

367
00:26:20,697 --> 00:26:22,695
Why don't you give me
a week to think about it?

368
00:26:23,162 --> 00:26:25,442
You know, cause I don't know
how long I'm gonna be here, huh?

369
00:26:25,745 --> 00:26:29,128
And, uh, you know,
if, during that week.

370
00:26:29,128 --> 00:26:31,946
y'know, you see somebody in there
that, uh, that's gonna fill the bill,

371
00:26:31,946 --> 00:26:34,650
hire 'im, you know,
part-time basis or whatever.

372
00:26:34,732 --> 00:26:36,908
And that way, uh, you know,
I'll make up my mind

373
00:26:36,908 --> 00:26:39,892
and, uh, you know,
we'll see where we are at that point.

374
00:26:39,927 --> 00:26:42,050
Okay, well,
I have to go now.

375
00:26:42,050 --> 00:26:43,737
Bye-bye, hon.

376
00:26:55,371 --> 00:26:57,236
<i>Eight. Eight more.
Come on.</i>

377
00:26:57,320 --> 00:26:59,727
<i>Work it.
Get the circulation going.</i>

378
00:26:59,727 --> 00:27:01,303
<i>Come on, step it up.</i>

379
00:27:02,534 --> 00:27:04,243
<i>Isn't peace wonderful?</i>

380
00:27:04,505 --> 00:27:09,082
<i>Mikhail Gorbachev, the most
improbable evil emperor in captivity</i>

381
00:27:09,553 --> 00:27:11,373
<i>captivates Manhattan,</i>

382
00:27:11,502 --> 00:27:16,116
<i>wows the U.N. by announcing
a unilateral cut in the Soviet military,</i>

383
00:27:16,590 --> 00:27:21,303
<i>smiles and waves with erstwhile
cold warriors Ronald Reagan...</i>

384
00:27:33,613 --> 00:27:37,154
<i>And the stock market has
its best week since July.</i>

385
00:27:37,652 --> 00:27:39,603
<i>Take that, Karl Marx.</i>

386
00:28:09,868 --> 00:28:12,484
Would you like to talk about
a possible lunch trade?

387
00:29:01,745 --> 00:29:03,364
- Cover your ears.
- What?

388
00:29:03,364 --> 00:29:04,517
Just do it.

389
00:29:10,796 --> 00:29:14,382
Do you know how whipped
an engine has to be to blow that loud?

390
00:29:23,341 --> 00:29:24,610
Call me.

391
00:29:26,785 --> 00:29:28,762
You ever hear
of a tune-up?

392
00:29:31,693 --> 00:29:34,165
You ever hear
of a ritual killing?

393
00:29:36,518 --> 00:29:37,379
I don't get it.

394
00:29:37,414 --> 00:29:40,690
You gnaw on her face in public
like that again and you'll be one.

395
00:29:52,055 --> 00:29:54,092
- Are you crazy?
- I can be.

396
00:29:54,176 --> 00:29:56,845
- You could've taken his head off.
- Yeah, but would he notice?

397
00:29:57,275 --> 00:29:59,574
Can we get
something straight?

398
00:29:59,609 --> 00:30:01,725
The guy's a predator
and you're his prey.

399
00:30:01,851 --> 00:30:03,560
- Oh, really?
- You bet.

400
00:30:03,644 --> 00:30:06,354
- And how do you know?
- When I was his age, I was the guy

401
00:30:06,439 --> 00:30:08,389
zooming the girls like you.

402
00:30:09,102 --> 00:30:11,235
Pretty face,
big chip on your shoulder.

403
00:30:11,319 --> 00:30:14,488
I recommend that you stay out
of my personal life.

404
00:30:15,327 --> 00:30:17,208
Do your parents stay out
of your personal life?

405
00:30:17,373 --> 00:30:19,826
They don't know
my personal life.

406
00:30:21,622 --> 00:30:25,797
- Have they met Twiddle Dink?
- His name is Bug.

407
00:30:27,739 --> 00:30:30,173
- First or last?
- First.

408
00:30:30,298 --> 00:30:32,506
What's his last name,
Spray?

409
00:30:35,803 --> 00:30:38,779
You should talk... Buck.

410
00:30:56,694 --> 00:30:58,369
No. No.

411
00:30:58,453 --> 00:31:02,206
N-O. Don't look at me
like that.

412
00:31:03,291 --> 00:31:04,740
Don't!

413
00:31:05,335 --> 00:31:07,409
That's not fair.

414
00:31:12,759 --> 00:31:15,349
Don't you have a favorite doll
or somethin'?

415
00:31:16,680 --> 00:31:19,576
Why don't we get one of your dolls
and put your dad's pyjamas on 'im?

416
00:31:19,576 --> 00:31:20,465
No.

417
00:31:27,298 --> 00:31:29,902
Your brother!
What about your brother?

418
00:31:31,237 --> 00:31:33,572
How about the dog?
You know the dog.

419
00:31:39,492 --> 00:31:41,746
You can't.
You just can't.

420
00:31:43,042 --> 00:31:45,803
It's a new law.
That's it.

421
00:31:46,080 --> 00:31:47,613
It's in the books.

422
00:31:49,285 --> 00:31:51,207
You don't wanna sleep
with me.

423
00:31:51,885 --> 00:31:54,627
Can somebody get that,
please?

424
00:31:56,556 --> 00:31:59,516
Do I have to do everything
around here?

425
00:32:04,565 --> 00:32:07,568
- Yo.
- Hi, sweetie. How are you?

426
00:32:07,652 --> 00:32:11,780
Fine. I'm earning my keep.
Uncle Buck's got me bustin' my hump.

427
00:32:11,906 --> 00:32:14,868
<i>He says a little hard work
will put some hair on my chest.</i>

428
00:32:14,903 --> 00:32:16,576
<i>At least
I'm learning a trade.</i>

429
00:32:16,703 --> 00:32:20,289
That's good. Grandpa's feeling
a little bit better.

430
00:32:20,689 --> 00:32:23,976
And... he sends you
big hugs and kisses.

431
00:32:24,011 --> 00:32:25,550
Tell 'im to hang in there.

432
00:32:26,631 --> 00:32:30,167
- Can you get uncle Buck?
- Will do, chickie.

433
00:32:30,384 --> 00:32:31,843
Mom?

434
00:32:31,927 --> 00:32:34,470
- Hi.
- Next time you take off,

435
00:32:34,505 --> 00:32:37,100
why don't you hire a murderer
to watch the house?

436
00:32:38,030 --> 00:32:39,948
<i>This guy's a joke.</i>

437
00:32:39,983 --> 00:32:43,826
Well, why don't you just go
your way and let him go his?

438
00:32:44,483 --> 00:32:46,860
While he systematically
dismantles my life?

439
00:32:46,985 --> 00:32:50,154
Another drawback is
that, uh... I'm a big drooler.

440
00:32:50,238 --> 00:32:51,836
You could wake up
in the middle of the night

441
00:32:51,836 --> 00:32:53,644
thinking you were asleep
in a swamp.

442
00:32:53,644 --> 00:32:56,453
- Mom's on the phone.
- Ah, good. I'll be right there.

443
00:32:56,729 --> 00:32:59,988
The guy took off today
and left Miles and Maizy alone.

444
00:33:01,307 --> 00:33:04,685
Plus... he drinks.

445
00:33:04,720 --> 00:33:08,083
- Did you, uh, brush your teeth?
- Yeah. You can even feel my toothbrush.

446
00:33:08,118 --> 00:33:11,652
You know, I have a friend who works
at the crime lab at the police station.

447
00:33:11,971 --> 00:33:15,057
I could give him your toothbrush
and he could run a test on it to see

448
00:33:15,140 --> 00:33:19,060
if you actually brushed your teeth or
just ran your toothbrush under the faucet.

449
00:33:27,403 --> 00:33:31,658
If that's true, we're gonna really
have to start brushing our teeth.

450
00:33:33,034 --> 00:33:34,410
Hi, how are you?

451
00:33:34,494 --> 00:33:37,937
<i>- I'm okay. How's everything?
- Good, good.</i>

452
00:33:38,165 --> 00:33:40,917
<i>- You sure?
- Everything is fine here.</i>

453
00:33:41,001 --> 00:33:43,545
- Everything is fine.
- Kids are okay?

454
00:33:43,671 --> 00:33:46,673
Oh, kids are... kids are great!
We're having a great time together.

455
00:33:47,041 --> 00:33:48,227
<i>How's your dad?</i>

456
00:33:48,510 --> 00:33:51,054
He's okay. He's okay.
He's getting better. Thanks.

457
00:33:51,179 --> 00:33:53,207
<i>Good. Well, that's good news.
That's encouraging.</i>

458
00:33:53,441 --> 00:33:56,033
<i>I got a real good feeling about this.
He's gonna be fine.</i>

459
00:33:56,131 --> 00:33:58,201
I got a few questions for ya.

460
00:33:58,236 --> 00:34:01,796
<i>You know, you got an interesting
set of, uh, plates in the living room there.</i>

461
00:34:01,796 --> 00:34:04,515
<i>- Are they old?
- Yeah.</i>

462
00:34:04,550 --> 00:34:04,651
They are.

463
00:34:05,862 --> 00:34:07,905
Where... where would you find
something like that?

464
00:34:08,030 --> 00:34:10,224
In an antique shop downtown
or somethin'?

465
00:34:12,767 --> 00:34:13,937
In England.

466
00:34:14,583 --> 00:34:15,965
<i>Everything else seems to be...</i>

467
00:34:20,992 --> 00:34:23,254
How many times a day
do you feed a dog like that?

468
00:34:23,919 --> 00:34:27,926
Ho-how... how many times
a day... do you think he eats?

469
00:34:28,409 --> 00:34:29,832
Four or five.

470
00:34:29,867 --> 00:34:32,964
I should have told you that
he eats once. Eats once a day.

471
00:34:33,132 --> 00:34:34,213
Just once?

472
00:34:35,903 --> 00:34:38,521
<i>What-what does he
like to drink? Uh... water?</i>

473
00:34:38,604 --> 00:34:42,108
Yes, yes, he drinks water.
I would keep some water out.

474
00:34:42,227 --> 00:34:44,622
I've been leaving
the toilet seats up.

475
00:34:45,404 --> 00:34:46,470
Yeah.

476
00:34:47,405 --> 00:34:49,448
Is that what the blue water is?
It's not good for him, huh?

477
00:34:50,906 --> 00:34:53,886
- God!
- That-that might account for somethin'.

478
00:34:54,205 --> 00:34:55,083
Nothing.

479
00:34:55,286 --> 00:34:59,980
Just, uh... ugh, an odd...
coloration out on the grass.

480
00:35:00,420 --> 00:35:01,405
Buck, um...

481
00:35:04,007 --> 00:35:08,009
I-I just want you to know it makes me
feel secure to know that you're there.

482
00:35:11,329 --> 00:35:12,474
Thank you very much.

483
00:35:12,599 --> 00:35:14,259
Okay, bye-bye.

484
00:35:21,317 --> 00:35:24,565
Bob? Bob?!

485
00:36:57,837 --> 00:36:59,213
Cindy?

486
00:37:09,171 --> 00:37:10,002
Open up.

487
00:37:12,811 --> 00:37:14,065
Hello?

488
00:37:22,946 --> 00:37:24,990
I'm getting mad.
All right.

489
00:37:25,116 --> 00:37:27,193
Get ready.
Here I come.

490
00:37:27,535 --> 00:37:30,224
Come on! What, do I have
to talk dirty to you?

491
00:37:30,610 --> 00:37:32,172
Come on.
Open up for daddy.

492
00:37:34,129 --> 00:37:34,920
There we go.

493
00:37:35,152 --> 00:37:36,893
Come on.
Nice and easy.

494
00:37:38,813 --> 00:37:41,432
Come on, here we go.
Take that! Take that! Come On!

495
00:37:41,432 --> 00:37:43,135
You don't want the crowbar,
do you? Come on!

496
00:37:44,784 --> 00:37:47,319
Open up! Come on!

497
00:37:48,161 --> 00:37:50,517
I'm gonna shove my load into you
whether you like it or not.

498
00:37:50,601 --> 00:37:51,589
Come on!

499
00:37:52,270 --> 00:37:56,008
Come on, you son of a bitch,
open up.

500
00:37:58,804 --> 00:37:59,822
Okay.

501
00:38:15,629 --> 00:38:17,713
- Freeze!
- What? Who are you?

502
00:38:17,797 --> 00:38:20,342
- Cindy!
- She-she's in Indianapolis.

503
00:38:20,467 --> 00:38:24,137
- What's she doing in Indianapolis?
- Her father had a heart attack.

504
00:38:24,221 --> 00:38:27,390
Who are you, and how do you know
her father had a heart attack?

505
00:38:27,515 --> 00:38:29,142
I'm her brother-in-law.

506
00:38:29,226 --> 00:38:31,809
Oh, yeah?
Who you talking dirty to?

507
00:38:34,315 --> 00:38:36,033
The washing machine.

508
00:38:36,345 --> 00:38:39,618
I-I don't know how to work it,
so I was kicking it and swearing at it

509
00:38:39,618 --> 00:38:42,823
you know, which is... not
an uncommon thing to do.

510
00:38:42,915 --> 00:38:44,448
And you thought that...

511
00:38:45,994 --> 00:38:48,639
- I apologize.
- Okay.

512
00:38:50,457 --> 00:38:52,741
Boy, that's funny.

513
00:38:54,561 --> 00:38:56,606
I live across the street.

514
00:38:56,785 --> 00:38:59,703
- My name is Marcie.
- Buck Russell.

515
00:39:00,468 --> 00:39:01,886
Marcie Dahlgren-Frost.

516
00:39:02,304 --> 00:39:04,889
Dahlgren is my maiden name.
Frost is my married name.

517
00:39:04,973 --> 00:39:08,467
I'm single again,
but I never bothered to lose the Frost.

518
00:39:09,333 --> 00:39:11,092
And I get compliments
on the hyphen.

519
00:39:11,359 --> 00:39:13,772
I'm sure you would,
sure you would. Yeah.

520
00:39:14,900 --> 00:39:17,541
Well, I came
to invite Cindy to lunch,

521
00:39:17,541 --> 00:39:20,381
but since she's not here,
do you have plans?

522
00:39:20,415 --> 00:39:23,770
Well, actually I-I got a lot of things
to do around here, you know.

523
00:39:23,770 --> 00:39:25,146
Rain check?

524
00:39:26,162 --> 00:39:28,447
I'm only gonna be here
a couple days.

525
00:39:28,482 --> 00:39:30,427
Cindy said it would only be
a couple o' days?

526
00:39:30,427 --> 00:39:33,086
Well, she didn't specify.
I just assumed, you know.

527
00:39:33,170 --> 00:39:36,373
My father's heart attack,
I was out of town for three weeks.

528
00:39:36,425 --> 00:39:38,349
No wonder
Cindy didn't call me.

529
00:39:38,591 --> 00:39:42,063
You need a relative
for an imposition of this size.

530
00:39:52,171 --> 00:39:53,524
Waiting for your sex?

531
00:39:54,214 --> 00:39:55,682
Shut up!

532
00:39:55,862 --> 00:39:56,946
Tia?

533
00:39:59,227 --> 00:40:03,107
Tia? Why'd you blow
all that makeup for?

534
00:40:03,107 --> 00:40:04,489
We're just going bowling.

535
00:40:05,615 --> 00:40:07,086
I'm not going bowling.

536
00:40:07,086 --> 00:40:09,427
Come on, it's a great sport,
and it's virtually impossible

537
00:40:09,427 --> 00:40:12,806
to get pregnant while doing it...
if you catch my drift.

538
00:40:12,962 --> 00:40:17,881
You're disgusting. I'll die
before I go anywhere with you.

539
00:40:17,916 --> 00:40:20,503
- It's gonna be fun.
- They have rent-a-shoes.

540
00:40:20,818 --> 00:40:22,846
And rent-a-foot-disease.

541
00:40:22,846 --> 00:40:26,393
We've done the battle of the wills.
The deck's stacked in my favor.

542
00:40:26,826 --> 00:40:28,442
You just gonna lose again.

543
00:40:28,925 --> 00:40:30,443
Try me.

544
00:40:31,070 --> 00:40:33,358
How'd you like to spend
the next several nights wondering

545
00:40:33,442 --> 00:40:35,736
if your crazy,
out-of-work bum uncle

546
00:40:36,795 --> 00:40:39,430
will shave your head
while you sleep?

547
00:40:39,603 --> 00:40:41,673
See you in the car.

548
00:41:17,114 --> 00:41:18,674
Come on up.

549
00:41:20,576 --> 00:41:23,569
There you go.
Now, this is a bowling ball.

550
00:41:58,033 --> 00:42:01,369
How you doing?
Never seen you here before.

551
00:42:01,494 --> 00:42:05,382
I know about everybody.
That's why they call me "Pal".

552
00:42:06,625 --> 00:42:11,104
Buy you a beer?
You must be a college student, right?

553
00:42:12,157 --> 00:42:14,258
Cheerleader probably.

554
00:42:15,593 --> 00:42:17,645
You look firm.

555
00:42:17,868 --> 00:42:20,389
Come on, give it a push.
That's it.

556
00:42:20,473 --> 00:42:23,525
You like
all-terrain vehicles?

557
00:42:24,203 --> 00:42:29,986
I got a brand-new Bronco
right out in the parking lot. Red.

558
00:42:30,098 --> 00:42:31,911
Wanna go for a ride?

559
00:42:36,365 --> 00:42:38,825
Maizy, if the object of the game were
to get the ball as close to the pins

560
00:42:38,951 --> 00:42:43,760
without knocking any of them over...
you would be champion of the world.

561
00:42:43,795 --> 00:42:45,773
- Really?
- Really.

562
00:42:52,132 --> 00:42:56,047
My throat hurts.
I can't... I can't talk.

563
00:42:56,551 --> 00:42:58,542
I got a cure for that.

564
00:43:04,210 --> 00:43:05,242
Buck!

565
00:43:05,497 --> 00:43:08,011
- You got a game goin' somewhere, Pal?
- Yeah.

566
00:43:08,046 --> 00:43:10,095
Yeah, well, you're not gonna get
any strikes sittin' there, are you?

567
00:43:10,095 --> 00:43:11,913
Move it.
Go on, get out!

568
00:43:15,365 --> 00:43:17,546
Hey, hey, shithead,
where the hell you been, huh?

569
00:43:23,665 --> 00:43:25,712
Come on, sit down.
I want you to meet my niece.

570
00:43:26,043 --> 00:43:27,920
Tia, this is Rog.
Rog, Tia.

571
00:43:28,004 --> 00:43:32,057
Hi. How are you?
E. Roger Coswell.

572
00:43:32,383 --> 00:43:34,434
Come on,
it ain't gonna bite.

573
00:43:36,955 --> 00:43:40,058
Okay. Uh, you got to let
somebody know where you are.

574
00:43:40,183 --> 00:43:42,545
I've been checking car trunks
for your corpse.

575
00:43:42,558 --> 00:43:44,813
Yeah, I'm sorry, but...
I've been in the suburbs

576
00:43:44,813 --> 00:43:47,477
looking after my brother's kids
for a few days, you know.

577
00:43:47,895 --> 00:43:49,336
They're cuties.
Well, I'll tell you.

578
00:43:49,371 --> 00:43:52,112
Art Linkletter was right. Kids do say
the goddamnedest things.

579
00:43:52,449 --> 00:43:56,592
- Is Chanice here?
- Uhh... No, I'm kinda flying solo tonight, uh....

580
00:43:56,592 --> 00:43:58,695
Yeah, I wanna let her have it
for not marrying you.

581
00:43:58,695 --> 00:44:01,192
You know, if she came
she'd marry your worthless butt,

582
00:44:01,192 --> 00:44:02,636
I would be able to find you.

583
00:44:02,874 --> 00:44:05,093
I gotta talk business.
I can't find you.

584
00:44:05,669 --> 00:44:08,588
Ah, why don't we, uh, why
don't we step in my office then?

585
00:44:08,672 --> 00:44:11,572
Excuse us, will you?
Come on, big mouth.

586
00:44:11,716 --> 00:44:15,382
- It was nice meeting you.
- I'll remember it always.

587
00:44:18,895 --> 00:44:20,245
Cute kid.

588
00:44:20,935 --> 00:44:24,208
- Jimmy Bean called.
- Oh, yeah?

589
00:44:24,208 --> 00:44:27,608
He's coming in for the Winter Million
at Burlington Park on Friday.

590
00:44:28,318 --> 00:44:32,736
He says it's a boat race, very easy money.
He owes you and he owes me.

591
00:44:32,736 --> 00:44:36,625
So he says we should show up an hour
before post time and he'll give us the tip.

592
00:44:36,910 --> 00:44:41,183
Consider this, Buck. With this score,
your whole year's covered.

593
00:44:46,185 --> 00:44:47,838
Maybe I can make it work.

594
00:44:48,924 --> 00:44:50,800
I'll see you Friday night.

595
00:44:51,219 --> 00:44:53,680
Thanks, Rog.
Watch the Sterno, will you?

596
00:45:00,079 --> 00:45:01,519
Hey, watch your fingers.

597
00:45:05,673 --> 00:45:07,181
What's a "Chanice"?

598
00:45:08,069 --> 00:45:10,720
That's someone who's, uh,
sometimes seen around a Buck.

599
00:45:10,755 --> 00:45:15,676
- Your girlfriend?
- A friend. And yes, she is a girl.

600
00:45:15,686 --> 00:45:17,537
Are you supposed
to marry her or something?

601
00:45:17,815 --> 00:45:21,575
The subject has come up, yes,
but nothing serious.

602
00:45:21,770 --> 00:45:25,091
Maybe if you got married,
you'd stop being such an asshole.

603
00:45:30,447 --> 00:45:33,178
- Cigar?
- No, thanks.

604
00:45:33,262 --> 00:45:36,274
- Let me know if you change your mind.
- I will.

605
00:45:37,267 --> 00:45:39,673
I'll get it nice
and juicy for you.

606
00:45:48,570 --> 00:45:53,507
This is where... this is where
you separate the men from the boys.

607
00:45:55,536 --> 00:45:57,037
Easy. Easy.

608
00:45:57,121 --> 00:46:01,495
There you go.
Yeah, I got you now.

609
00:46:12,647 --> 00:46:14,914
Happy birthday!

610
00:46:17,518 --> 00:46:19,427
I hope you're hungry.

611
00:46:20,630 --> 00:46:23,983
You should see the toast.
I couldn't even get it through the door.

612
00:46:33,035 --> 00:46:37,081
Announcement here, uh...
There'll be a little delay on the, uh... clown.

613
00:46:37,165 --> 00:46:40,501
- What clown?
- Miles' mom hired a clown.

614
00:46:56,783 --> 00:46:58,227
What's the matter,
you don't like clowns?

615
00:46:58,527 --> 00:47:01,353
Yeah, about five years ago.
Now they're so boring

616
00:47:01,353 --> 00:47:03,080
they make me puke.

617
00:47:04,555 --> 00:47:09,370
The vest, the flower...
Screw 'em. That's all they get.

618
00:47:11,576 --> 00:47:14,579
I'm Pooter the Clown.
Put it there.

619
00:47:17,546 --> 00:47:18,499
Kids will love that.

620
00:47:19,003 --> 00:47:21,127
I didn't order you.
My sister-in-law did.

621
00:47:21,211 --> 00:47:23,597
She's not here right now.
I'm looking after the... I'm the uncle.

622
00:47:23,597 --> 00:47:27,175
- Buck Russell's the name.
- Great. Listen, I'm sorry I'm, uh, late.

623
00:47:27,301 --> 00:47:30,666
I was at this
all-night bachelorette party.

624
00:47:30,763 --> 00:47:32,557
Hey, need any dildo jokes?

625
00:47:32,765 --> 00:47:34,672
I'm the guy!

626
00:47:38,735 --> 00:47:40,899
What did you... what did you have,
a few drinks this morning?

627
00:47:41,237 --> 00:47:43,665
Huh? I-I think you did,
didn't ya?

628
00:47:44,012 --> 00:47:47,296
What are you, Mother Cabrini?
You never touch the stuff?

629
00:47:47,489 --> 00:47:50,960
No, no, no, but I-I-I wouldn't be drinking
if I was gonna entertain some kids.

630
00:47:50,960 --> 00:47:55,113
Hey. I don't have to take any shit
from you. You know who I am?

631
00:47:55,664 --> 00:48:00,242
In the field of local,
live home entertainment, I'm a god!

632
00:48:01,463 --> 00:48:04,441
Get in your mouse
and get outa here.

633
00:48:04,454 --> 00:48:07,886
Hey, you... Let me tell you
something, you lowlife,

634
00:48:07,970 --> 00:48:11,114
lying, four-flushing
sack o' shit.

635
00:48:34,740 --> 00:48:36,194
Let's go out
to the car, uh?

636
00:48:39,083 --> 00:48:40,992
Why?

637
00:48:42,297 --> 00:48:43,895
What do you mean "why"?

638
00:48:49,387 --> 00:48:50,743
Not now.

639
00:48:51,706 --> 00:48:52,809
It's fine.

640
00:48:55,164 --> 00:48:56,848
It's not fine.

641
00:48:57,573 --> 00:48:58,886
Why not?

642
00:49:00,699 --> 00:49:02,823
I just don't feel right yet.

643
00:49:04,643 --> 00:49:06,531
You ever gonna feel right?

644
00:49:12,570 --> 00:49:14,226
I don't get
where we're going.

645
00:49:14,282 --> 00:49:17,238
I told you 25 times.
We're gonna pick up Tia.

646
00:49:17,241 --> 00:49:19,460
She's at a cheerleader's house,
having dinner.

647
00:49:19,460 --> 00:49:20,939
Well, so she says.

648
00:49:20,974 --> 00:49:23,896
Since when do cheerleaders
live in the woods?

649
00:49:28,321 --> 00:49:29,758
Come on,
I'll take you home now.

650
00:49:32,101 --> 00:49:33,880
I don't wanna go home.

651
00:49:38,621 --> 00:49:42,138
- I'm okay.
- Sure?

652
00:49:46,169 --> 00:49:47,680
Trust me.

653
00:49:59,380 --> 00:50:00,890
Shit!

654
00:50:17,872 --> 00:50:19,827
Well, well, well.

655
00:50:19,985 --> 00:50:23,656
They certainly are scraping the bottom of
the barrel for cheerleaders these days.

656
00:50:25,033 --> 00:50:27,495
What are you doing here?

657
00:50:27,530 --> 00:50:29,680
We were just drivin' by,
going out for some ice cream.

658
00:50:29,680 --> 00:50:31,466
Thought you might like
to join us.

659
00:50:31,845 --> 00:50:35,706
I said I would be home at 10:00.
It's not even 9:00.

660
00:50:38,589 --> 00:50:42,286
Who said anything about that? I just thought
you'd like to join us for some ice cream.

661
00:50:42,885 --> 00:50:47,055
Maybe your "Bug" here can join us.
We can talk about burying the hatchet.

662
00:50:47,139 --> 00:50:49,060
You know what a hatchet is,
don't you, Bug?

663
00:50:49,060 --> 00:50:52,400
- It's an ax?
- Sort of, yeah. Yeah.

664
00:50:53,033 --> 00:50:55,501
I got one in the car
if you'd like to see it.

665
00:50:56,761 --> 00:50:59,164
- I'll pass.
- Fair enough.

666
00:50:59,199 --> 00:51:03,129
I like to carry it. You know, you never
know when you're gonna need it.

667
00:51:04,033 --> 00:51:06,974
Uhh, you know,
a situation may come up, say, uh...

668
00:51:07,035 --> 00:51:09,514
For example,
someone's been... drinking

669
00:51:09,898 --> 00:51:12,391
and about to drive
a loved one home.

670
00:51:12,617 --> 00:51:14,585
Then I like to know
I have it.

671
00:51:14,669 --> 00:51:18,410
Not to kill, no.
Just to maim.

672
00:51:18,548 --> 00:51:20,703
Take a little off the shoulder...

673
00:51:22,344 --> 00:51:24,471
The elbow...
Shave a little meat

674
00:51:24,554 --> 00:51:26,376
off the old kneecap...

675
00:51:26,934 --> 00:51:30,011
Ooh... You got
both kneecaps?

676
00:51:30,632 --> 00:51:34,981
I like to keep mine razor-sharp too.
Sharp enough you can shave with 'em.

677
00:51:35,187 --> 00:51:37,758
Why, I've been known
to circumcise a gnat.

678
00:51:39,112 --> 00:51:41,044
You're not a gnat,
are you, Bug?

679
00:51:41,685 --> 00:51:45,531
Wait a minute.
Bug... Gnat...

680
00:51:46,912 --> 00:51:49,289
Is there a little similarity there?

681
00:51:51,124 --> 00:51:54,185
Whoa, I think there is.

682
00:51:56,088 --> 00:51:58,381
You understand
what I'm talkin' about?

683
00:51:59,925 --> 00:52:03,952
I don't think you do.
I'll be right back.

684
00:52:11,563 --> 00:52:14,966
- I'm sorry.
- Look, um, uh... I think you'd better split.

685
00:52:14,966 --> 00:52:17,824
You know, I don't exactly want him
going berserk with an ax on me.

686
00:52:18,699 --> 00:52:19,863
He's all talk.

687
00:52:19,947 --> 00:52:22,026
Here it is!

688
00:52:22,742 --> 00:52:26,234
Come on over!
Come on, I wanna show it to ya.

689
00:52:27,914 --> 00:52:29,723
Maybe later.

690
00:52:29,921 --> 00:52:30,890
Okay.

691
00:52:37,465 --> 00:52:41,845
He's gone in a few days.
Just relax.

692
00:52:43,389 --> 00:52:45,306
I'll get him back.

693
00:53:00,002 --> 00:53:03,075
That's a pretty stupid thing
to do during flu season.

694
00:53:03,201 --> 00:53:05,391
I bet she's getting
the tongue.

695
00:54:08,516 --> 00:54:09,828
Just lookin'.

696
00:55:28,732 --> 00:55:29,816
Next.

697
00:55:32,653 --> 00:55:35,538
Tell you what. Let me go
in there first, okay? I'll cover for you.

698
00:55:35,823 --> 00:55:39,473
Give you a little more time
right here to relax. All right?

699
00:55:47,210 --> 00:55:48,731
Morning.

700
00:55:56,303 --> 00:55:58,264
I'm Anita Hoargarth.

701
00:55:58,671 --> 00:56:01,846
Buck Melanoma,
Moley Russell's wart.

702
00:56:05,479 --> 00:56:09,494
Not her wart. Not her wart.
I'm... I'm the wart.

703
00:56:09,776 --> 00:56:13,779
She's my tumor, my-my growth,
my, uh, my pimple.

704
00:56:13,863 --> 00:56:14,975
I'm "uncle Wart".

705
00:56:14,975 --> 00:56:18,118
Just old Buck "Wart" Russell,
that's what they call me.

706
00:56:18,202 --> 00:56:21,382
Or, uh, Melanoma Head.
They'll call me that.

707
00:56:21,747 --> 00:56:23,694
Melanoma Head's comin'.

708
00:56:24,259 --> 00:56:28,463
I'm sor... Uncle,
Maizy Russell's uncle. I'm her uncle.

709
00:56:29,672 --> 00:56:32,591
Her, uh, her mother, uh, set up
this conference with you.

710
00:56:33,216 --> 00:56:35,317
I'm assistant principal here

711
00:56:35,317 --> 00:56:38,928
as you've probably noticed
from the indications on the door.

712
00:56:42,936 --> 00:56:44,980
- This door?
- The outer door!

713
00:56:45,106 --> 00:56:46,185
- The outer door.
- Yes.

714
00:56:46,185 --> 00:56:47,918
Cause there's nothing
on this one.

715
00:56:48,043 --> 00:56:50,296
That's just about
enough of that.

716
00:56:52,040 --> 00:56:53,205
Sorry.

717
00:56:54,574 --> 00:56:59,644
I've been an educator
for 31.3 years

718
00:56:59,644 --> 00:57:03,666
and in that time,
I've seen a lot of bad eggs.

719
00:57:03,792 --> 00:57:06,945
I say "eggs" because
at the elementary level,

720
00:57:06,945 --> 00:57:10,845
we are not dealing
with fully-developed individuals.

721
00:57:14,053 --> 00:57:18,848
I see a bad egg
when I look at your niece.

722
00:57:19,448 --> 00:57:22,611
She is a twiddler, a dreamer,

723
00:57:22,611 --> 00:57:26,303
a silly heart,
she is a jabberbox.

724
00:57:26,453 --> 00:57:28,411
And, frankly...

725
00:57:28,446 --> 00:57:31,062
I don't think
she takes a thing

726
00:57:31,062 --> 00:57:36,160
in her life or her career
as a student seriously.

727
00:57:38,228 --> 00:57:39,774
She's only six.

728
00:57:39,809 --> 00:57:44,907
That is not a valid excuse!
I hear that every day and I dismiss it.

729
00:57:45,002 --> 00:57:48,742
I don't think I wanna know a six-year-old
who isn't a dreamer or a silly heart.

730
00:57:49,007 --> 00:57:52,838
And I sure don't wanna know one who
takes their student career seriously.

731
00:57:53,387 --> 00:57:57,556
I don't have a college degree.
I don't even have a job.

732
00:57:58,601 --> 00:58:00,401
Does anyone have
a special story to tell the class

733
00:58:00,401 --> 00:58:02,657
about something
that happened this week?

734
00:58:04,329 --> 00:58:04,898
Maizy.

735
00:58:05,150 --> 00:58:06,951
My uncle was
microwaving my socks

736
00:58:06,951 --> 00:58:10,023
and the dog threw up
on the couch for about an hour.

737
00:58:10,321 --> 00:58:12,210
- Honest?
- Yes.

738
00:58:12,210 --> 00:58:14,359
Why was your uncle
microwaving your socks?

739
00:58:14,359 --> 00:58:17,156
He can't get the goddamn
washing machine to work.

740
00:58:17,191 --> 00:58:19,155
Blasphemer!

741
00:58:19,190 --> 00:58:21,353
But I know a good kid
when I see one.

742
00:58:21,708 --> 00:58:23,311
Because they're all good kids,

743
00:58:23,311 --> 00:58:26,438
until dried-out,
brain-deadskags like you

744
00:58:26,697 --> 00:58:29,687
drag them down and
convince them they're no good.

745
00:58:29,722 --> 00:58:33,336
You so much as scowl at my niece
or any other kid in this school

746
00:58:33,336 --> 00:58:36,194
and I hear about it,
I'm comin' looking for you.

747
00:58:38,815 --> 00:58:42,277
Take this quarter.
Go downtown,

748
00:58:42,440 --> 00:58:45,460
and have a rat gnaw
that thing off your face.

749
00:58:46,810 --> 00:58:48,653
Good day to you,
madam.

750
00:58:56,079 --> 00:58:57,368
Next.

751
00:58:57,455 --> 00:58:59,666
Ah, yeah!

752
00:59:19,567 --> 00:59:22,639
<i>Hi-hi, Chanice.
This is Terry.</i>

753
00:59:22,977 --> 00:59:24,622
<i>Uh, Walt Bern...</i>

754
00:59:25,263 --> 00:59:28,702
Jesus, would you get with the program?
Bernstein is his name.

755
00:59:28,802 --> 00:59:32,029
<i>Uh, I forgot to give you the number.
Don't get mad.</i>

756
00:59:32,064 --> 00:59:34,664
I hope somebody knows
what they're doing down there.

757
00:59:35,314 --> 00:59:37,299
<i>Chanice? Buck.</i>

758
00:59:39,083 --> 00:59:40,557
<i>I hate these machines.</i>

759
00:59:40,557 --> 00:59:44,923
<i>Um, look, I'm just calling
to say I, uh... I miss you.</i>

760
00:59:46,341 --> 00:59:49,218
<i>I know you probably
don't believe it, but it's... it's true.</i>

761
00:59:49,302 --> 00:59:51,262
<i>No, I haven't been drinking.</i>

762
00:59:51,388 --> 00:59:52,333
<i>I'm thinking
a lot about you</i>

763
00:59:52,333 --> 00:59:54,345
<i>and what we've talked about
the past few weeks.</i>

764
00:59:55,173 --> 00:59:56,582
<i>I think about you
all the time</i>

765
00:59:56,582 --> 00:59:59,975
<i>and... think about
those two dimples on your buns.</i>

766
01:00:01,273 --> 01:00:02,614
Dimples.

767
01:00:02,942 --> 01:00:03,820
<i>What did we call 'em?</i>

768
01:00:03,820 --> 01:00:07,032
<i>One-one was, um... The right
was Lyndon and the left was...</i>

769
01:00:07,032 --> 01:00:08,896
<i>- Was Johnson.
- ... Johnson, I think.</i>

770
01:00:08,896 --> 01:00:10,259
<i>No, that was
your boobs we did.</i>

771
01:00:10,943 --> 01:00:14,116
<i>No, your boobs were Minnie and Mickey.
I remember that because of Disney World.</i>

772
01:00:14,567 --> 01:00:16,414
<i>And Felix... Felix is
what we called your...</i>

773
01:00:17,874 --> 01:00:20,830
Goddamn kids!

774
01:00:21,163 --> 01:00:23,691
Okay, come on, you,
come on, get in the house.

775
01:00:23,714 --> 01:00:25,815
What are you doing out here
making all this noise?

776
01:00:26,634 --> 01:00:29,857
Get in the house where
you belong. Come on! Come on!

777
01:00:32,015 --> 01:00:35,700
- Who let the cat out?
- We don't have a cat.

778
01:00:35,894 --> 01:00:40,504
Come on, get out. Get out!
Go on, shoo! Shoo, shoo, shoo, shoo!

779
01:00:46,424 --> 01:00:47,350
Hey!

780
01:00:49,909 --> 01:00:52,494
Open up. Miles?!

781
01:00:59,342 --> 01:01:00,346
Hello?

782
01:01:00,461 --> 01:01:03,721
Hi. May I please speak to
Buck Russell? This is a friend of his.

783
01:01:03,721 --> 01:01:05,292
<i>Chanice Kobolowski.</i>

784
01:01:07,511 --> 01:01:12,070
I'm sorry, Chanice.
He's not here right now.

785
01:01:13,350 --> 01:01:15,071
Well, can you tell me
when he's gonna be back?

786
01:01:15,071 --> 01:01:16,854
<i>He went out with Marcie.</i>

787
01:01:16,889 --> 01:01:19,237
The lady who lives
across the street.

788
01:01:19,524 --> 01:01:22,121
They usually stay out
pretty late.

789
01:01:26,336 --> 01:01:28,345
Do you wanna
leave a message?

790
01:01:33,253 --> 01:01:36,720
Um, no,
there's no message.

791
01:01:55,896 --> 01:01:57,791
No message.

792
01:02:23,008 --> 01:02:24,384
Hot!

793
01:02:38,192 --> 01:02:43,927
- Is there a big sexy guy in here?
- Oh, please don't let it be true.

794
01:02:45,302 --> 01:02:49,589
- Hi.
- Oh, my God! What are you doing?

795
01:02:49,703 --> 01:02:51,996
The, uh, laundry.
What's it look like?

796
01:02:52,122 --> 01:02:55,709
Washing machine's still broken
so I thought I'd use the, uh, microwave.

797
01:02:55,835 --> 01:02:58,481
Nuke 'em up, you know.
Heats 'em up pretty good too.

798
01:02:58,713 --> 01:03:01,090
You know, it kills the germs
and the odors that they cause.

799
01:03:01,215 --> 01:03:03,102
You don't know
what you're doing.

800
01:03:03,217 --> 01:03:07,237
You're bored out of your mind.
You need a little adult supervision.

801
01:03:08,019 --> 01:03:09,140
Excuse me?

802
01:03:24,074 --> 01:03:26,260
- Come on.
- Come on, I don't wanna dance.

803
01:03:26,260 --> 01:03:27,725
Come ooon!

804
01:03:27,725 --> 01:03:30,955
Come on, I don't feel like it. I'm not
a dancer. Come on, this is ridiculous.

805
01:03:31,040 --> 01:03:33,167
I'm not gonna leave
unless you do.

806
01:03:33,543 --> 01:03:35,805
Okay, okay.
One dance, though. That's it.

807
01:03:35,805 --> 01:03:37,590
Cause I really have
to take a nap and uh...

808
01:03:39,089 --> 01:03:41,110
All right. One dance.
That's it.

809
01:03:51,103 --> 01:03:52,043
What's this?

810
01:03:54,465 --> 01:03:58,026
Ah, come on. The dog is watching.
Come on. What are you doing?

811
01:03:58,109 --> 01:03:59,979
What is that,
dirty dancing?

812
01:04:01,405 --> 01:04:04,933
Ain't that where you get the girl
by the neck... whoa... and dip 'er? Whoa!

813
01:04:06,924 --> 01:04:09,347
Dips. Dips.

814
01:04:18,632 --> 01:04:19,628
Am I bleedin'?

815
01:04:22,260 --> 01:04:24,315
Will you get off?
My back!

816
01:04:30,895 --> 01:04:32,561
Hello!

817
01:04:37,152 --> 01:04:38,328
I mean it.

818
01:04:41,322 --> 01:04:44,479
This is fun, though, isn't it?
I guess.

819
01:04:45,744 --> 01:04:49,872
My aerobic workout today.
Heart's beating like a rabbit here.

820
01:05:12,481 --> 01:05:13,857
Hi, Chanice.

821
01:05:15,025 --> 01:05:16,638
Surprise!

822
01:05:18,362 --> 01:05:20,573
- This is, uh...
- Marcie.

823
01:05:24,369 --> 01:05:28,008
Yeah, Marcie. And, uh,
she lives across the road.

824
01:05:28,043 --> 01:05:30,786
- And she came over to, uh...
- Shut up, Buck.

825
01:05:30,927 --> 01:05:32,635
That's-that's a good idea.

826
01:05:34,963 --> 01:05:37,173
Is this who you were out with
last night?

827
01:05:40,505 --> 01:05:43,716
What? I didn't go out
last night.

828
01:05:45,260 --> 01:05:48,644
Hey, ho... look, honest! Honest!
Honest! I'm telling you the truth.

829
01:05:48,728 --> 01:05:52,197
- You son of a bitch!
- Don't say that, okay? Chanice!

830
01:05:52,232 --> 01:05:54,505
Don't walk away like...
Chanice!

831
01:05:54,619 --> 01:05:57,181
Chanice!
Hey, come here!

832
01:05:57,404 --> 01:05:59,280
Chanice!
Come here, hon.

833
01:06:02,242 --> 01:06:03,326
Chanice, wait a minute!

834
01:06:03,410 --> 01:06:05,454
Wait a minute. Let me explain
to you. Let me explain.

835
01:06:06,581 --> 01:06:09,417
Chanice, I'm warning you.
You're wrecking the driveway.

836
01:06:10,368 --> 01:06:11,424
Chanice!

837
01:06:12,211 --> 01:06:13,329
Come on!

838
01:06:14,928 --> 01:06:16,535
I love you!

839
01:06:33,728 --> 01:06:35,903
Oh, what flew up her nose?

840
01:06:42,494 --> 01:06:45,844
You better, uh... go home.
Okay, Marcie?

841
01:06:46,099 --> 01:06:48,822
Pick up your records.
The party's over.

842
01:06:49,571 --> 01:06:50,466
Okay?

843
01:06:59,011 --> 01:07:02,627
So, I'll just go home and wait
for the Federal Express man.

844
01:07:11,984 --> 01:07:16,225
- Good night, uncle Buck.
- Good night, sweetheart.

845
01:07:26,415 --> 01:07:28,772
- Uncle Buck?
- Yeah.

846
01:07:29,252 --> 01:07:32,643
- Got a minute?
- I got lots of minutes.

847
01:07:33,173 --> 01:07:35,414
Now that everything's okay
with my grandfather,

848
01:07:35,414 --> 01:07:37,113
I wanna go out
tomorrow night.

849
01:07:37,303 --> 01:07:40,614
You can go crazy after I leave.
Until then, I'm not letting you out.

850
01:07:47,438 --> 01:07:50,419
You just can't find any way
to be cool, can you?

851
01:07:50,419 --> 01:07:51,537
Do you mean easy? No.

852
01:07:51,537 --> 01:07:54,461
- I mean decent!
- You mean blind.

853
01:07:54,461 --> 01:07:58,175
Who are you trying
to score points with? My parents?

854
01:07:58,700 --> 01:08:01,433
How many times have they had you
here since we moved?

855
01:08:01,468 --> 01:08:04,581
Try none, until they went up
shit creek and got stuck.

856
01:08:04,665 --> 01:08:07,246
Get used
on your parents' time.

857
01:08:07,832 --> 01:08:10,097
- Hey, Buck!
- Yeah.

858
01:08:11,213 --> 01:08:13,591
Have a bad day today?

859
01:08:16,386 --> 01:08:19,472
It hurts when someone screws
with your life, doesn't it?

860
01:08:38,200 --> 01:08:39,546
Last call.

861
01:08:44,124 --> 01:08:46,591
There you go.
There you go.

862
01:08:49,004 --> 01:08:51,021
A little for you,
a little for me.

863
01:08:56,929 --> 01:08:58,333
Boy!

864
01:09:00,600 --> 01:09:05,466
People used to say to me "Boy, Buck,
you are one lucky son of a bitch.

865
01:09:07,941 --> 01:09:10,318
You got it made, Buck.
You got it made."

866
01:09:10,444 --> 01:09:12,595
And I did. I did.

867
01:09:12,612 --> 01:09:14,905
They'd say
"Oh, man, Buck, look at you.

868
01:09:14,990 --> 01:09:17,034
You don't have any kids,
you don't have any wife.

869
01:09:17,118 --> 01:09:20,621
You don't have a desk...
you don't have an office.

870
01:09:20,746 --> 01:09:24,082
You don't have... you don't have
a boss to worry about."

871
01:09:27,462 --> 01:09:30,881
They were right.
I had it made.

872
01:09:36,430 --> 01:09:38,571
Only thing now is, Perce...

873
01:09:40,892 --> 01:09:43,116
nobody says that
anymore.

874
01:09:47,900 --> 01:09:49,414
Oh, boy.

875
01:09:49,986 --> 01:09:51,189
But...

876
01:09:52,114 --> 01:09:54,177
it'll all be better
tomorrow.

877
01:09:56,993 --> 01:09:58,780
It always is.

878
01:10:01,415 --> 01:10:04,710
Cause tomorrow,
we go to the track...

879
01:10:05,169 --> 01:10:08,938
win some dough,
some serious dough.

880
01:10:13,011 --> 01:10:15,627
Make a lot of money
tomorrow, kiddo.

881
01:10:15,930 --> 01:10:18,474
You want a little pretzel
with your beer?

882
01:10:24,402 --> 01:10:26,756
U.B. went to school
to pick you up, you know.

883
01:10:26,942 --> 01:10:29,698
Tell U.B. when he gets home
that he lost, okay?

884
01:10:29,698 --> 01:10:30,975
Lost what?

885
01:10:31,421 --> 01:10:35,459
Just tell him. He'll know what it means.
I'll see you guys Sunday.

886
01:10:35,494 --> 01:10:37,983
- What day is today?
- Friday.

887
01:10:38,131 --> 01:10:40,589
- You know what that means.
- Jumbo party.

888
01:10:41,166 --> 01:10:43,971
You put that on a platter
and serve it up hot.

889
01:11:44,567 --> 01:11:45,738
U.B.'s home.

890
01:11:46,193 --> 01:11:48,411
Tia? Tia!

891
01:11:49,061 --> 01:11:52,416
- You guys seen Tia?
- She took a breeze, U.B.

892
01:11:55,639 --> 01:11:59,249
And she promised me she was gonna
look after you guys this evening.

893
01:11:59,374 --> 01:12:02,460
She promised me!
So much for promises.

894
01:12:02,714 --> 01:12:05,447
Does anyone in this house
know how to keep a promise?

895
01:12:05,630 --> 01:12:07,930
Well, I know... I know
you two guys do. I know.

896
01:12:08,301 --> 01:12:11,124
You know, I had somewhere
very important to go to tonight.

897
01:12:11,679 --> 01:12:13,889
This is how
I make my living. This is...

898
01:12:14,015 --> 01:12:17,686
This was... very important to me. This was...
My whole year was based on tonight.

899
01:12:17,811 --> 01:12:21,397
It may be peanuts to your dad,
but it's my living.

900
01:12:21,481 --> 01:12:24,574
I have no choice. I don't care
what your parents are gonna say.

901
01:12:24,574 --> 01:12:28,127
- I-I-I have to take you with me tonight.
- Where?

902
01:12:28,313 --> 01:12:30,305
To a racetrack.

903
01:12:33,118 --> 01:12:35,603
Here we go. Do you have
to go to the bathroom?

904
01:12:35,603 --> 01:12:36,361
- No.
- No.

905
01:12:36,361 --> 01:12:38,149
- You sure?
- Yep.

906
01:12:38,303 --> 01:12:42,360
This is gonna be fun, you know, uh...
Beautiful horses, interesting people...

907
01:12:43,129 --> 01:12:46,216
- And we'll win some serious coin, right?
- Well, sometimes, yeah.

908
01:12:46,299 --> 01:12:48,008
But that's not the real reason
people go there.

909
01:12:48,008 --> 01:12:51,666
People go because
of the, uh, beautiful horses

910
01:12:51,666 --> 01:12:55,593
and the, uh,
the colorful jockeys, and, uh...

911
01:12:56,185 --> 01:12:58,287
- Bug picked up Tia?
- Mm-hmm.

912
01:12:58,854 --> 01:13:01,237
Well, she said
she was going... to a party.

913
01:13:01,237 --> 01:13:04,916
She said she'd be back Sunday.
Must be a slumber party.

914
01:13:07,238 --> 01:13:09,546
All right. Hop in the back there.
Get your belts on.

915
01:13:11,285 --> 01:13:15,038
Let her go to a party all weekend!
She's old enough to know better.

916
01:13:15,998 --> 01:13:17,709
She doesn't listen
to anybody anyway.

917
01:13:19,000 --> 01:13:20,719
Damn kids.

918
01:14:03,882 --> 01:14:05,592
Yeah? Kobolowski Tires.

919
01:14:06,427 --> 01:14:07,925
Hi. It's me.

920
01:14:08,644 --> 01:14:10,889
Buck, can't you ever
take a hint?

921
01:14:10,973 --> 01:14:14,560
Chanice, it's not about me.
I got a problem at the house.

922
01:14:14,644 --> 01:14:16,854
<i>I-I need somebody
to watch the kids.</i>

923
01:14:16,980 --> 01:14:18,416
No, I'll tell you
what you need.

924
01:14:18,602 --> 01:14:21,651
Your horse fixer's in town
and you need to get to the track.

925
01:14:21,734 --> 01:14:23,862
I ran into Rog.
See, he told me all about it.

926
01:14:23,987 --> 01:14:26,932
<i>The idiot had the nerve
to ask me for a loan.</i>

927
01:14:27,157 --> 01:14:29,358
What's the matter?
You can't take children with you

928
01:14:29,358 --> 01:14:30,679
when you gonna cheat
on a horse race?

929
01:14:30,679 --> 01:14:32,955
Ah, you got some religion
out there in the 'burbs?

930
01:14:33,080 --> 01:14:35,706
I came close.
I-I had them in the car.

931
01:14:36,417 --> 01:14:38,862
Can we put our personal problems
aside for a second?

932
01:14:39,562 --> 01:14:42,892
Tia took off on me. I was supposed
to pick her up after school.

933
01:14:42,892 --> 01:14:44,933
<i>- She wasn 't there.
- What do you mean, she ran away?</i>

934
01:14:45,176 --> 01:14:47,551
I d... I guess.
I don't know. I...

935
01:14:48,596 --> 01:14:50,864
She's... 15. She's angry,

936
01:14:50,864 --> 01:14:54,802
<i>she's confused...
And I need to find her.</i>

937
01:14:56,137 --> 01:14:58,190
Can you help me?

938
01:14:59,107 --> 01:15:01,063
<i>I'm really stuck, Chanice.</i>

939
01:15:04,769 --> 01:15:09,423
All right. All right. I will help you
because there's kids involved in this.

940
01:15:09,423 --> 01:15:11,258
But as far as you and I
are concerned,

941
01:15:11,580 --> 01:15:13,026
<i>it is over.</i>

942
01:15:14,684 --> 01:15:16,417
However it has to be.

943
01:15:18,462 --> 01:15:20,597
- I'll be there.
- Thank you.

944
01:15:20,632 --> 01:15:22,758
For what it's worth,
I'm sorry.

945
01:15:44,322 --> 01:15:46,199
- Your car's on fire.
- Car's on fire.

946
01:15:46,325 --> 01:15:48,535
No. No, no, no, no.
It's just a little oil.

947
01:15:48,619 --> 01:15:51,329
I'm looking for a party
somewhere around here.

948
01:15:51,414 --> 01:15:53,290
Oh, that's
on Totowa Lane.

949
01:15:53,415 --> 01:15:55,292
My niece is there.

950
01:15:55,418 --> 01:15:57,545
- Our son is there.
- Ah, kids!

951
01:15:57,670 --> 01:16:00,923
I don't think you ought to go in there
with that hat on. They'll kill you.

952
01:16:01,007 --> 01:16:02,125
- Really?
- Yeah.

953
01:16:02,125 --> 01:16:03,524
Thanks for the tip.

954
01:16:48,892 --> 01:16:53,271
I'm... I'm supposed
to come over and watch you.

955
01:16:56,663 --> 01:17:00,946
Hi. I-I-I'm Chanice Kobolowski.
I'm uncle Buck's friend.

956
01:17:01,030 --> 01:17:02,823
May I see
your driver's license, ma'am?

957
01:17:04,074 --> 01:17:05,122
Yeah.

958
01:17:05,826 --> 01:17:08,424
Sure. Good idea.

959
01:17:10,415 --> 01:17:12,234
Wait. I got it.

960
01:17:14,544 --> 01:17:16,505
See. Look.

961
01:17:16,588 --> 01:17:19,424
- Gotta please take it out of there?
- Take it out?!

962
01:17:43,409 --> 01:17:44,733
You okay?

963
01:17:45,661 --> 01:17:47,305
Now, what's the matter?

964
01:18:12,064 --> 01:18:14,691
Coming through.
How you doing?

965
01:18:15,860 --> 01:18:17,323
Having a good time?

966
01:18:17,945 --> 01:18:19,648
Have you seen
a guy named Bug around here?

967
01:18:21,825 --> 01:18:24,446
I'm Tia Russell's uncle.
You know Tia?

968
01:18:24,786 --> 01:18:28,072
No? She's kinda new.
I'm her uncle.

969
01:18:28,957 --> 01:18:31,566
You haven't seen the Bug
around here, have you?

970
01:18:32,836 --> 01:18:34,699
Nice guy.

971
01:18:35,005 --> 01:18:37,603
Hey, hey, come back here
with that!

972
01:18:43,889 --> 01:18:47,223
How you doing?
Anybody seen Bug around here?

973
01:18:48,672 --> 01:18:50,342
Hey, nice music.

974
01:18:51,106 --> 01:18:54,777
Who is that, the Grass Roots?
I'm kidding. I know my music.

975
01:19:00,824 --> 01:19:03,451
Stop it, please.

976
01:19:05,997 --> 01:19:10,125
What the hell is that?
Hey, party time!

977
01:19:10,209 --> 01:19:13,552
Let's get down here!
You seen Bug around here?

978
01:19:14,084 --> 01:19:17,383
You seen Bug? Do it, man.
That's good stuff.

979
01:19:19,010 --> 01:19:20,224
Keep it up, keep it up.

980
01:19:21,221 --> 01:19:22,386
Nice work.

981
01:19:23,474 --> 01:19:26,393
How you doing?
Excuse me.

982
01:19:26,477 --> 01:19:27,872
Crowded, huh?

983
01:19:31,650 --> 01:19:36,013
- I don't wanna do this.
- Just relax.

984
01:19:38,072 --> 01:19:41,607
Hello, young fellow. How are you?
I'm Tia Russell's uncle, Buck Russell.

985
01:19:41,607 --> 01:19:45,621
You seen the Bug around?
No? I'm looking for 'im.

986
01:19:45,747 --> 01:19:49,084
You're Tia Russell's uncle?
Really?

987
01:19:49,168 --> 01:19:51,545
Hey, give me that!

988
01:19:51,629 --> 01:19:53,610
Take my hat,
you punk!

989
01:19:54,340 --> 01:19:56,550
- Don't mention it.
- All right, pop.

990
01:19:58,887 --> 01:20:00,248
You haven't seen a guy
named Bug, have you?

991
01:20:00,248 --> 01:20:03,136
Everybody knows Bug.
Hip hip guy. You know it.

992
01:20:03,136 --> 01:20:05,696
Hey, let me through, will you?
Your mother know you do that?

993
01:20:10,608 --> 01:20:12,141
Hey, this room's taken.

994
01:20:12,943 --> 01:20:15,624
- I wanna go.
- No, you don't.

995
01:20:18,366 --> 01:20:21,748
That door opens,
I'm gonna kick somebody's ass!

996
01:20:22,924 --> 01:20:24,459
Do you hear me?

997
01:22:16,694 --> 01:22:17,631
Tia.

998
01:22:36,638 --> 01:22:38,322
You were right.

999
01:22:40,100 --> 01:22:42,937
Everything you said
would happen, happened.

1000
01:22:44,689 --> 01:22:47,490
I don't wanna talk about it.
I just wanna get you home.

1001
01:23:22,854 --> 01:23:24,814
Is this a trick?

1002
01:23:29,612 --> 01:23:31,131
No.

1003
01:23:34,658 --> 01:23:36,702
You know what happened?

1004
01:23:39,247 --> 01:23:40,704
Yeah.

1005
01:23:43,918 --> 01:23:47,005
Are you gonna tell my parents
about everything that's been goin' on?

1006
01:23:49,675 --> 01:23:51,036
No.

1007
01:23:53,846 --> 01:23:55,581
Thanks.

1008
01:23:58,851 --> 01:24:01,824
I've been riding your butt all week
about how you live your life.

1009
01:24:05,484 --> 01:24:08,797
I realized maybe somebody
should have been riding mine.

1010
01:24:09,154 --> 01:24:12,574
I'm probably the last guy
in the world you'd wanna help...

1011
01:24:15,536 --> 01:24:18,163
I really could use your advice
vis-a-vis Chanice.

1012
01:24:19,873 --> 01:24:20,389
I've been, uh...

1013
01:24:21,896 --> 01:24:26,416
stringing her along...
for about eight years now. Uh...

1014
01:24:27,080 --> 01:24:30,106
Maybe you could figure out
what the hell is wrong with me.

1015
01:24:31,004 --> 01:24:33,596
I did such a great job earning
your trust and admiration

1016
01:24:33,596 --> 01:24:36,777
I'm confused why
I can't do the same with Chanice.

1017
01:24:46,402 --> 01:24:47,527
You know, there's, uh...

1018
01:24:50,907 --> 01:24:57,038
one family charity case
that, uh, loves you very much.

1019
01:24:59,333 --> 01:25:01,024
I'm sorry.

1020
01:25:01,667 --> 01:25:03,072
Hey, come on.

1021
01:25:04,338 --> 01:25:06,270
Nothing to be sorry about.

1022
01:25:07,175 --> 01:25:10,845
I'm just kinda glad
I got a chance to know you again.

1023
01:25:15,397 --> 01:25:17,756
Did you do anything
to Bug?

1024
01:25:24,652 --> 01:25:29,504
Oh, my God!
What did you do?

1025
01:25:40,191 --> 01:25:43,213
You shithead!
I could have suffocated here!

1026
01:25:43,571 --> 01:25:46,010
Um, do you know
what I'd like you to do?

1027
01:25:46,010 --> 01:25:47,845
Actually, you could be doing
both of us a favor.

1028
01:25:47,845 --> 01:25:50,756
I'd like you to apologize
to the lady, please.

1029
01:25:50,804 --> 01:25:58,004
I'm sorry! I'm sorry!!
Okay, asshole? I'm sorry!!

1030
01:25:58,270 --> 01:26:02,024
I don't know if I told you this or not,
but, uh, I'm an amateur dentist.

1031
01:26:02,692 --> 01:26:05,152
Oh, yes, he is.

1032
01:26:12,995 --> 01:26:16,585
- I'm sorry.
- Get 'im out of there.

1033
01:26:16,832 --> 01:26:20,002
Yeah? It was half-hearted.
We'll let him. Here we go.

1034
01:26:20,128 --> 01:26:23,214
- I'm really sorry.
- I'm sure you are, I'm sure you are.

1035
01:26:23,339 --> 01:26:26,341
- I am.
- Let me just get you. There you go.

1036
01:26:26,467 --> 01:26:29,470
I didn't mean
to hurt anybody.

1037
01:26:29,596 --> 01:26:31,055
There you go.

1038
01:26:31,181 --> 01:26:32,890
I'm sorry.

1039
01:26:40,316 --> 01:26:42,327
- Shall we?
- Yeah.

1040
01:26:48,908 --> 01:26:52,244
Yeah? Well, come on back
and I'll kick your ass, man!

1041
01:26:52,328 --> 01:26:55,250
Chicken shit!
You're dead!

1042
01:26:55,874 --> 01:26:57,016
Shit.

1043
01:27:03,256 --> 01:27:05,634
I'm gonna
sue your balls off, man!

1044
01:27:05,718 --> 01:27:09,869
Why don't you come
and get me, man? Come on!

1045
01:27:10,764 --> 01:27:15,311
Come on, man. I'm gonna sue you
and your whole family!

1046
01:27:15,653 --> 01:27:18,814
Okay, pal,
time for a golf lesson.

1047
01:27:18,898 --> 01:27:21,256
My dad's a lawyer, man!
You're history!

1048
01:27:21,469 --> 01:27:23,635
A little five wood.

1049
01:27:26,240 --> 01:27:29,536
What? What?
What are you doin', man?

1050
01:27:32,955 --> 01:27:34,223
You're history, man.
You're wasted.

1051
01:27:34,223 --> 01:27:36,197
I'm gonna sue you
for everything you've got, man!

1052
01:27:36,375 --> 01:27:39,169
You're gonna be broke,
so, come on, come and get me!

1053
01:27:40,756 --> 01:27:42,353
You fat sucker!

1054
01:27:43,175 --> 01:27:44,342
Yes, sir!

1055
01:27:45,594 --> 01:27:48,403
You... you son of a bitch!
That hurt!

1056
01:27:48,403 --> 01:27:51,471
Hey! Hey! Hey!
I'm not sorry, all right?

1057
01:27:52,476 --> 01:27:54,778
I ain't sorry for shit!

1058
01:27:57,941 --> 01:28:00,090
What do you see
in that guy anyway?

1059
01:28:01,361 --> 01:28:03,592
I can't for the life of me
figure that one out.

1060
01:28:04,155 --> 01:28:07,094
Don't answer. Don't answer.
You don't have to.

1061
01:28:10,245 --> 01:28:13,414
I appreciate the confession to you.
Thank you. Thanks a lot.

1062
01:28:13,540 --> 01:28:15,563
But my problems with Buck
go a whole lot deeper

1063
01:28:15,563 --> 01:28:18,294
than a misunderstanding
with a neighbor lady.

1064
01:28:18,489 --> 01:28:20,416
Don't you think
he loves you?

1065
01:28:22,133 --> 01:28:24,469
If he does,
he'd never say it.

1066
01:28:24,870 --> 01:28:25,928
What if he did?

1067
01:28:26,054 --> 01:28:29,014
Then I would suspect
he needed a new set of tires.

1068
01:28:29,849 --> 01:28:31,394
Seriously.

1069
01:28:31,429 --> 01:28:35,154
Seriously, you're very sweet
to talk about this.

1070
01:28:36,065 --> 01:28:38,192
But I don't think you understand
the bigger picture.

1071
01:28:38,317 --> 01:28:41,992
See, Buck's a charming man
who wants to remain a boy forever.

1072
01:28:43,091 --> 01:28:43,455
Boy...

1073
01:28:43,455 --> 01:28:47,140
And at my age, that doesn't make
for a lasting relationship.

1074
01:28:47,204 --> 01:28:52,330
Well, I think he'd make
a wonderful husband and father.

1075
01:28:52,330 --> 01:28:54,693
- You do?
- Oh, yeah.

1076
01:28:54,728 --> 01:28:56,864
My sister and brother
adore 'im.

1077
01:28:57,968 --> 01:29:02,761
Um... He's... He really has changed
since he's been here this week.

1078
01:29:02,968 --> 01:29:05,200
He really has changed.

1079
01:29:05,512 --> 01:29:10,194
He's responsible, caring,
and loving

1080
01:29:11,186 --> 01:29:14,421
and... enthusiastic.

1081
01:29:15,189 --> 01:29:20,171
- Energetic.
- And energetic and decent and...

1082
01:29:22,197 --> 01:29:23,466
kind and...

1083
01:29:25,951 --> 01:29:30,144
And humble
and honest and forthright.

1084
01:29:30,289 --> 01:29:31,623
Sense of humor.

1085
01:29:31,707 --> 01:29:34,322
And he's really got
a great sense of humor.

1086
01:29:34,322 --> 01:29:36,628
Did he by any chance
put you up to this?

1087
01:29:36,712 --> 01:29:38,090
No!

1088
01:29:38,258 --> 01:29:42,468
Oh, no. Mm-hmm. No, I've just
gathered this from my own observations.

1089
01:29:43,609 --> 01:29:45,034
- No, well...
- No.

1090
01:29:45,034 --> 01:29:46,974
- It's just the way he is.
- Really?

1091
01:29:54,981 --> 01:29:57,984
- Really?
- Oh, yeah!

1092
01:29:58,069 --> 01:29:59,731
So unlike him.

1093
01:30:15,713 --> 01:30:17,196
Check this out.

1094
01:30:22,929 --> 01:30:27,258
Hi, honey.
Is the, uh, coffee ready?

1095
01:30:28,267 --> 01:30:29,707
A little thirsty.

1096
01:30:30,269 --> 01:30:33,606
By the way, I have told you
I loved you...

1097
01:30:34,054 --> 01:30:36,598
and it wasn't for tires,
sweetheart.

1098
01:30:36,693 --> 01:30:38,820
It was for shocks,
remember?

1099
01:30:44,035 --> 01:30:46,059
Are they sweethearts
or what?

1100
01:30:46,370 --> 01:30:50,041
This one's smart as a whip.
I'm gonna miss 'em like crazy.

1101
01:30:50,166 --> 01:30:52,783
They're beautiful children.
What happened to you?

1102
01:30:53,211 --> 01:30:55,880
Recessive gene,
skips every nine generations.

1103
01:30:55,964 --> 01:30:58,591
I got it this time.
Tragic.

1104
01:30:58,675 --> 01:31:02,221
- It isn't so bad, is it?
- What?

1105
01:31:02,471 --> 01:31:03,677
The house, the family,
the kids.

1106
01:31:03,677 --> 01:31:07,090
Oh, oh, yeah, yeah.
It was great. This is great.

1107
01:31:07,768 --> 01:31:09,682
You know, we should have done this
a long time ago,

1108
01:31:09,682 --> 01:31:11,784
something like this,
you know, you and I.

1109
01:31:26,423 --> 01:31:28,133
They're here.

1110
01:31:33,629 --> 01:31:34,949
What are we doing?

1111
01:31:36,651 --> 01:31:38,884
Well, your mother,
you see...

1112
01:31:39,010 --> 01:31:41,220
and your sister have to, uh...

1113
01:31:41,345 --> 01:31:44,443
sort some things out. That's so.
They have to sort thing out.

1114
01:31:44,443 --> 01:31:46,660
So we're gonna be
very quiet for them. Right?

1115
01:31:46,660 --> 01:31:49,213
So why... don't we put
a button on it, like this,

1116
01:31:52,857 --> 01:31:55,035
and a zipper... like that...

1117
01:31:55,070 --> 01:31:57,128
and a lock.

1118
01:31:57,446 --> 01:32:01,032
I can't talk at all.
I throw the key away.

1119
01:32:55,424 --> 01:32:59,940
It's gonna be real different.
I promise.

1120
01:33:00,013 --> 01:33:02,116
I love you.

1121
01:33:14,788 --> 01:33:15,697
Shit!

1122
01:33:15,780 --> 01:33:18,287
- Bye.
- Bye, uncle Buck.

1123
01:33:19,284 --> 01:33:21,246
Could I get out
the door, please?

1124
01:33:21,786 --> 01:33:23,829
- I'm going!
- This is heavy.

1125
01:33:23,913 --> 01:33:25,610
- Bye, Chanice.
- Bye.

1126
01:33:26,750 --> 01:33:28,371
- Thanks again, Buck.
- Thanks for the good time, U.B.

1127
01:33:28,371 --> 01:33:32,338
Hey, next time you're downtown,
maybe we can, uh, go out for a coffee.

1128
01:33:34,503 --> 01:33:35,687
Okay.

1129
01:33:36,928 --> 01:33:40,014
We really had a good time.
I know it's kinda ridiculous.

1130
01:33:40,139 --> 01:33:41,512
We did leave the house
a little messy.

1131
01:33:41,512 --> 01:33:43,266
We did try our best. You know,
we're not so good at clean.

1132
01:33:43,266 --> 01:33:43,675
Chanice.

1133
01:33:43,710 --> 01:33:46,562
- What?
- We're goin' home. We're not dyin'.

1134
01:33:46,646 --> 01:33:49,841
Okay. I'm saying good-bye.
Is that all right? Nice guy, you see?

1135
01:33:50,066 --> 01:33:51,474
Tell the neighbors
we're really sorry

1136
01:33:51,474 --> 01:33:53,702
about having that thing
parked in the driveway all week.

1137
01:33:53,886 --> 01:33:56,138
You know, he's getting
a new company car on Monday.

1138
01:33:56,138 --> 01:33:57,075
The hell I am!

1139
01:33:57,075 --> 01:33:59,111
The piece is good
for another 100,000 miles.

1140
01:33:59,111 --> 01:34:00,552
Yeah, well,
it's too bad that you're not.

1141
01:34:00,552 --> 01:34:02,173
That's funny, Chanice,
that's really good.

1142
01:34:02,173 --> 01:34:04,360
See what I put up with?
And don't drive fast.

1143
01:34:04,665 --> 01:34:06,962
I'm not fixing
any more tickets for you.