1 00:00:38,300 --> 00:00:40,359 Extreme close-up! 2 00:00:47,976 --> 00:00:49,807 OK. All right. 3 00:00:49,978 --> 00:00:52,742 All right. Here we are in our new surroundings, 4 00:00:52,915 --> 00:00:56,681 the abandoned Acme Doll factory in downtown Aurora, Illinois. 5 00:00:56,852 --> 00:01:01,653 - An official babe lair. - It'll be Chick Central. 6 00:01:01,824 --> 00:01:04,622 I feel sorry for guys who still live with their parents. 7 00:01:04,793 --> 00:01:08,285 OK. You've probably noticed we're on early tonight. 8 00:01:08,464 --> 00:01:12,401 Usually, at this time on Aurora Cable, you're watching Plant World. 9 00:01:12,569 --> 00:01:14,901 They didn't want our 10:30 time slot. 10 00:01:15,071 --> 00:01:19,303 But we were able to talk Plant World into changing with Cooking World. 11 00:01:19,476 --> 00:01:21,740 Although they didn't want to change. 12 00:01:21,911 --> 00:01:26,371 Fortunately, White Supremacy World was cancelled and the trades worked. 13 00:01:26,549 --> 00:01:28,881 Finally, the reason we're on early 14 00:01:29,052 --> 00:01:31,714 is because we're going to a concert tonight in Chicago. 15 00:01:31,888 --> 00:01:34,254 - Excellent. - Yes. 16 00:01:34,424 --> 00:01:39,293 Did I mention that we'll be seeing Aerosmith? 17 00:01:41,998 --> 00:01:45,456 Until next week, good night and party on. 18 00:01:45,635 --> 00:01:47,660 - Party on, Wayne! - Party on, Garth. 19 00:01:56,246 --> 00:01:58,339 And we're out. 20 00:01:58,515 --> 00:02:02,747 - All right! Let's move, people! - All right. Garth! 21 00:02:02,919 --> 00:02:05,786 - To the Mirthmobile. - The Mirthmobile! 22 00:02:15,199 --> 00:02:16,689 All right! 23 00:02:26,610 --> 00:02:32,207 Hi. I'm Wayne Campbell. Excellent. Welcome to Wayne's World 2. 24 00:02:32,383 --> 00:02:35,045 Let me bring you up to speed. Come on. 25 00:02:37,755 --> 00:02:41,122 There's a lot to tell you, so let's take the scenic route. 26 00:02:44,695 --> 00:02:49,155 A year has passed. I'm a little older and a little wiser. 27 00:02:49,333 --> 00:02:52,632 I'm starting to get hair in really weird places. 28 00:02:52,803 --> 00:02:55,670 I feel like I'm turning into Sasquatch. 29 00:02:55,839 --> 00:02:58,137 I still go out with my girlfriend Cassandra. 30 00:02:58,309 --> 00:03:00,072 She's cutting a record demo right now. 31 00:03:00,244 --> 00:03:05,409 Her career's really taking off. You remember Cassandra, don't you? 32 00:03:12,790 --> 00:03:16,420 What a babe! She'd give a dog a bone! 33 00:03:18,330 --> 00:03:21,857 But you know, even though I live on my own now, 34 00:03:22,033 --> 00:03:25,525 everybody's really hassling me to do something with my life. 35 00:03:25,704 --> 00:03:27,831 To become an adult. 36 00:03:28,006 --> 00:03:32,033 I feel like I'm in a John Hughes "rites de passage" movie. 37 00:03:32,210 --> 00:03:35,577 But what I'd really like to do is something extraordinary. 38 00:03:35,747 --> 00:03:41,379 Something big, something mega, copious, capacious, cajunga. 39 00:03:41,553 --> 00:03:45,649 But I'll probably end up working at Great America, 40 00:03:45,824 --> 00:03:49,021 mopping up hurl and lung butter. 41 00:03:59,537 --> 00:04:03,598 You remember my best friend Garth Algar, right? 42 00:04:03,775 --> 00:04:07,734 I almost forgot. This year, Garth finally got pubes. 43 00:04:13,618 --> 00:04:16,109 You didn't tell them about my pubes, did you? 44 00:04:16,288 --> 00:04:18,757 No, of course not. 45 00:04:23,863 --> 00:04:26,491 You are listening to WPIG, the Pig. 46 00:04:26,666 --> 00:04:32,332 - All rock, all the time. - WPIG Aurora. 47 00:04:32,505 --> 00:04:36,874 Handsome Dan coming at you on the short side of nine bells at WPIG, 48 00:04:37,043 --> 00:04:42,242 America's rock authority. What do you say we check in with Mr Scream? 49 00:04:56,028 --> 00:04:59,794 God, Handsome Dan is so cool. He must get a million chicks. 50 00:04:59,965 --> 00:05:02,456 I bet he's totally studly and buffed. 51 00:05:02,635 --> 00:05:05,536 With that voice, he's gotta be a babe magnet. 52 00:05:17,083 --> 00:05:19,780 Welcome to Mikita's. How may I serve you? 53 00:05:19,953 --> 00:05:26,017 I'd like 'rullers, 'ugar, 'ucks and a Mikita 'cup... 54 00:05:26,927 --> 00:05:31,728 And then I think I would like a large... ...with 'eam. 55 00:05:32,699 --> 00:05:36,328 And could I please have 'elly donut and... 56 00:05:36,903 --> 00:05:40,566 ...raspberry and a 'nge drink? - What? 57 00:05:40,741 --> 00:05:45,804 - I'm sorry. And 'eaker 'oken. - Let me recap the order. 58 00:05:45,979 --> 00:05:48,709 A cruller, two sugar pucks, a large coffee with cream, 59 00:05:48,882 --> 00:05:52,909 a raspberry jelly doughnut, orange drink, a box of five-holes. 60 00:05:54,087 --> 00:05:57,887 - Yeah. - Thank you. Drive around, please. 61 00:06:03,630 --> 00:06:07,589 I'm so psyched. Aerosmith's gonna kick ass! 62 00:06:11,438 --> 00:06:14,965 But where are we supposed to meet Cassandra? 63 00:06:16,643 --> 00:06:19,077 Backstage laminates. 64 00:06:35,463 --> 00:06:37,693 Encore! Encore! 65 00:07:39,895 --> 00:07:41,954 Let's go! 66 00:07:45,534 --> 00:07:48,526 Garth! Somebody just grabbed my butt! 67 00:07:49,872 --> 00:07:53,273 - All right! - I feel weird. 68 00:07:58,247 --> 00:08:01,307 It's like a thousand fingers urging you to let go. 69 00:08:02,751 --> 00:08:05,948 - I'm having fun. - Excellent! 70 00:08:23,672 --> 00:08:27,905 - You guys wail! You guys rule, man! - Lunch is here! 71 00:08:28,077 --> 00:08:31,046 - Dude looks like a lady... - So do you! 72 00:08:36,152 --> 00:08:37,813 All right! Coming by! 73 00:08:37,987 --> 00:08:42,583 Excuse me! Where is the backstage area? 74 00:08:53,002 --> 00:08:55,562 Excuse us. Excuse me. 75 00:09:01,945 --> 00:09:03,879 They're cool. 76 00:09:09,719 --> 00:09:13,052 - There she is. Cassandra! - Campbell! 77 00:09:19,495 --> 00:09:21,793 - Campbell! - There she is. 78 00:09:22,832 --> 00:09:26,461 - Sorry we couldn't sit together. - No troubles. Great concert! 79 00:09:27,070 --> 00:09:31,269 I want you to meet somebody. This is Bobby Cahn of Sharp Records. 80 00:09:31,442 --> 00:09:33,603 - Excellent. - Good to see you. 81 00:09:33,777 --> 00:09:38,771 - Bobby's my record producer. - We must drop by the studio. 82 00:09:38,949 --> 00:09:42,248 I don't have to tell you how extremely talented Cassandra is. 83 00:09:42,419 --> 00:09:44,717 You've heard, you've seen, you know. 84 00:09:44,888 --> 00:09:50,588 Scott. I want you to meet someone. Cassandra, this is Scott. 85 00:09:50,761 --> 00:09:52,820 - Hi. - And Dwayne. 86 00:09:52,997 --> 00:09:54,988 - Actually, Wayne. - Right. 87 00:09:55,165 --> 00:09:59,397 - Bobby says you're very talented. - I was saying the same thing. 88 00:10:00,237 --> 00:10:02,330 I want to ask you something. 89 00:10:06,176 --> 00:10:10,306 - Don't you hate schmoozing? - Yes. I just despise it. 90 00:10:13,584 --> 00:10:15,449 Stand back, please! 91 00:10:20,658 --> 00:10:23,684 We're not worthy! We're not worthy! 92 00:10:23,861 --> 00:10:28,298 - You're worthy. Get up. - You guys were excellent tonight. 93 00:10:28,465 --> 00:10:32,163 - Thanks a lot. We'll see you inside. - We're planning on it. 94 00:10:36,708 --> 00:10:37,936 Excellent. 95 00:10:38,109 --> 00:10:41,272 Gotcha. Great. Hold on. 96 00:10:42,347 --> 00:10:43,644 Excuse me. 97 00:10:48,720 --> 00:10:53,885 - Jeez. Wayne, look. - Garth, it's Heather locklear. 98 00:10:55,126 --> 00:10:58,892 And she's signalling to us! There is a God. 99 00:10:59,064 --> 00:11:02,056 Heather be thy name. 100 00:11:02,233 --> 00:11:05,566 Schwing! 101 00:11:06,104 --> 00:11:08,629 - Bobby! - Heather! 102 00:11:08,807 --> 00:11:12,004 - Are you coming? - Yeah, we're... 103 00:11:12,177 --> 00:11:14,042 - This is Cassandra. - Hello. 104 00:11:14,212 --> 00:11:16,339 We're supposed to be in there. 105 00:11:16,514 --> 00:11:19,540 - No, you're not. - My girlfriend's in there. 106 00:11:19,718 --> 00:11:23,119 A lot of people's girlfriends are in there. 107 00:11:23,288 --> 00:11:25,188 Denied. 108 00:11:45,811 --> 00:11:48,336 Hi! Where are you from? I'm from Wilmette. 109 00:11:48,514 --> 00:11:52,041 I'm from Cicero. Isn't it cool to be downtown? 110 00:11:52,218 --> 00:11:55,278 Are you those guys with that TV show in Aurora? 111 00:11:55,454 --> 00:11:58,082 - Wayne's World? - Wayne's World! 112 00:11:58,257 --> 00:12:02,125 - No! - You guys sure look like 'em. 113 00:12:02,294 --> 00:12:06,025 If Wayne says we're not, we're not, OK? 114 00:12:06,866 --> 00:12:09,300 How long does it take to get here from Aurora? 115 00:12:09,468 --> 00:12:11,766 It takes me 40 minutes door-to-door. 116 00:12:11,937 --> 00:12:16,533 My ma gave me a dollar and dropped me off at the park-and-ride. 117 00:12:22,515 --> 00:12:24,881 Dogs. Dogs. 118 00:12:27,219 --> 00:12:30,382 ...and Marilyn. Marilyn. 119 00:12:31,957 --> 00:12:35,553 I saw the creature. I saw the creature... 120 00:13:25,779 --> 00:13:29,010 - Who are you? - I'm Jim Morrison. 121 00:13:29,182 --> 00:13:35,348 - Cool. Who's he? - A weird naked Indian. 122 00:13:35,522 --> 00:13:37,217 Cool. 123 00:13:38,459 --> 00:13:40,689 Why have you brought me here? 124 00:13:40,862 --> 00:13:43,956 To help you find some answers, Wayne. 125 00:13:44,131 --> 00:13:46,531 - Answers to what? - Ask me a question. 126 00:13:46,701 --> 00:13:51,400 Two trains travelling at 60mph, one from Chicago, one from los Angeles... 127 00:13:51,572 --> 00:13:53,972 No. Ask me a question about your life. 128 00:13:55,243 --> 00:13:58,076 What am I supposed to do with my life? 129 00:13:58,913 --> 00:14:01,905 You should put on a concert in Aurora, Wayne. 130 00:14:02,083 --> 00:14:07,646 - How will I get the bands to come? - If you book them, they will come. 131 00:14:07,822 --> 00:14:10,347 But I don't know how to put on a concert. 132 00:14:10,524 --> 00:14:14,016 You must go to England and find a man named Del Preston, 133 00:14:14,195 --> 00:14:15,560 the greatest roadie that ever lived. 134 00:14:15,730 --> 00:14:18,824 He was with us in the good times and the bad. 135 00:14:19,000 --> 00:14:21,764 He'll help you. Any more questions? 136 00:14:22,737 --> 00:14:25,831 Will Garth ever get his Sports Illustrated football phone? 137 00:14:26,007 --> 00:14:27,975 It was sent to the wrong house. 138 00:14:28,142 --> 00:14:31,737 It will arrive tomorrow with the swimsuit issue and the video, 139 00:14:31,913 --> 00:14:35,178 The Stanley Cup - 100 Years of Glory. 140 00:14:37,718 --> 00:14:39,653 How do I get back? 141 00:14:39,821 --> 00:14:43,882 - Follow the weird naked Indian. - Cool. 142 00:14:44,059 --> 00:14:46,584 Wake up, Wayne! 143 00:14:48,330 --> 00:14:53,700 Garth! I just had the most vivid and powerful dream of my life. 144 00:14:53,869 --> 00:14:56,838 Last night, Jim Morrison spoke to me. 145 00:14:57,005 --> 00:15:01,442 He told me that the purpose of my life was to put on a concert. 146 00:15:02,644 --> 00:15:07,206 Guess what finally came in the mail? 147 00:15:07,382 --> 00:15:09,680 I guess they sent it to the wrong house. 148 00:15:09,851 --> 00:15:12,615 My Sports Illustrated football phone... 149 00:15:12,788 --> 00:15:14,813 - Oh, my God! - Cool. 150 00:15:14,990 --> 00:15:17,720 My Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue... 151 00:15:20,128 --> 00:15:21,595 Oh, my God. 152 00:15:21,763 --> 00:15:24,926 ...and the History of the Stanley Cup - 100 Years of Glory. 153 00:15:25,100 --> 00:15:28,126 Garth, it's a sign! 154 00:15:29,171 --> 00:15:35,940 We will put on a concert. Oh, yes. We will put on a concert. 155 00:15:50,626 --> 00:15:52,355 This must be the place. 156 00:15:52,528 --> 00:15:55,520 Maybe we should've called Cassandra before we dropped by. 157 00:15:55,698 --> 00:16:00,601 Garth, it's us. No one'll hassle us. Cassandra needs the encouragement. 158 00:16:06,376 --> 00:16:09,709 Excuse me, what are you guys doing here in the street? 159 00:16:09,879 --> 00:16:12,939 I'm stacking these chickens in the crates. 160 00:16:13,116 --> 00:16:15,710 Jim makes sure we have plenty of watermelons. 161 00:16:15,885 --> 00:16:17,876 So you're selling watermelons? 162 00:16:18,054 --> 00:16:21,922 No, we just make sure there's plenty stacked. Just like the chickens. 163 00:16:22,091 --> 00:16:27,620 - What do they do? - They walk past with this glass. 164 00:16:28,364 --> 00:16:30,764 That's... weird. 165 00:16:30,933 --> 00:16:35,063 You got to wonder if this is gonna pay off later on. 166 00:16:46,050 --> 00:16:50,851 - Cool. - It's OK. 167 00:16:51,021 --> 00:16:54,855 We ought to overdub a track with Bobby. He can wail. 168 00:16:55,025 --> 00:16:58,426 Give them a few minutes. They're working on it. 169 00:16:58,595 --> 00:17:02,190 The label figures you got three singles on this one. 170 00:17:02,366 --> 00:17:05,631 - They want you to come to the coast. - Excellent. 171 00:17:05,803 --> 00:17:08,772 Not bad for a little girl from Hong Kong. 172 00:17:14,344 --> 00:17:18,872 - What brings you here, Wayne? - I had to tell Cassandra something. 173 00:17:19,650 --> 00:17:22,312 - Yeah? - Yeah. 174 00:17:22,486 --> 00:17:27,253 Last night I had a dream. We're gonna put on a concert in Aurora. 175 00:17:27,424 --> 00:17:31,622 - That's a great idea. - Yeah. It's a festival. 176 00:17:31,795 --> 00:17:34,025 - A festival? - A festival. You heard the man. 177 00:17:34,198 --> 00:17:39,431 - Charming. What's it called? - What's it called? It's called... 178 00:17:41,972 --> 00:17:44,065 It's called... 179 00:17:45,209 --> 00:17:48,577 - It's called Waynestock. - Waynestock. 180 00:17:49,114 --> 00:17:51,810 Who's going to be there? 181 00:17:54,586 --> 00:17:59,114 - Aerosmith and Pearl Jam. - Who else? 182 00:18:02,494 --> 00:18:05,190 Me and Wayne. 183 00:18:06,231 --> 00:18:08,859 - And... - And... 184 00:18:11,536 --> 00:18:14,767 - Van Halen. - Van Halen. Who else? 185 00:18:14,939 --> 00:18:16,429 Yeah. Who else? 186 00:18:17,909 --> 00:18:21,777 An old man fashioning a kayak out of a log...? 187 00:18:22,847 --> 00:18:26,078 - What? - No! Rip Taylor! 188 00:18:26,251 --> 00:18:27,582 Rip Taylor's gonna be there. 189 00:18:27,752 --> 00:18:32,121 Rip Taylor? He's a God in my country. He gets mobbed in the street. 190 00:18:32,290 --> 00:18:37,421 Great, 'cause he's gonna be there. I thought maybe you could play, too. 191 00:18:37,595 --> 00:18:40,530 - I would be honoured. - I wouldn't commit just yet. 192 00:18:40,698 --> 00:18:43,132 You got some real gigs coming up. Real gigs! 193 00:18:43,301 --> 00:18:45,895 Real gigs? 194 00:18:46,070 --> 00:18:49,472 Lx-nay on the condescension-ay there, Chet. 195 00:18:50,743 --> 00:18:54,645 - Bobby, can I ask you a question? - What is it, Garth? 196 00:18:54,813 --> 00:18:58,476 A sphincter says what? 197 00:18:59,985 --> 00:19:05,389 I said, a sphincter says what? 198 00:19:05,891 --> 00:19:11,022 You want me to say "what", like I don't get it. Is that it? 199 00:19:14,333 --> 00:19:15,630 Is that it? 200 00:19:15,801 --> 00:19:20,898 Oh, dear. Last guy didn't get. You big. You big. 201 00:19:21,073 --> 00:19:24,304 We small. We better go. 202 00:19:25,311 --> 00:19:26,642 - Where are you going? - England! 203 00:19:28,214 --> 00:19:31,581 I can't believe Paramount is paying to fly us to England. 204 00:19:31,750 --> 00:19:33,911 I thought they'd use doubles. 205 00:19:35,287 --> 00:19:40,088 - Here we are at Piccadilly Circus. - What a shitty circus. 206 00:19:40,259 --> 00:19:42,454 Good call. There's no animals or clowns. 207 00:19:42,628 --> 00:19:46,530 What a rip-off. Let's go to Buckingham Palace. 208 00:19:46,999 --> 00:19:52,700 Does Princess Di still live here? She is such a babe. 209 00:19:58,078 --> 00:20:02,310 Did Jim Morrison give you Del Preston's exact address? 210 00:20:02,482 --> 00:20:06,748 - He said exactly london, England. - OK. 211 00:20:11,825 --> 00:20:14,385 I don't know about this, Wayne. 212 00:20:23,870 --> 00:20:27,931 - Del? - Hello? 213 00:20:41,621 --> 00:20:45,921 - Are you Del Preston? - I might be. Who are you? 214 00:20:46,092 --> 00:20:48,822 - My name's Wayne Campbell. - I'm Garth Algar. 215 00:20:48,995 --> 00:20:52,761 That's terribly fascinating, man, but you woke me up. 216 00:20:52,932 --> 00:20:55,265 How can you sleep like that? 217 00:20:55,436 --> 00:21:00,806 Listen, Sonny Jim, sleeping like this will add 10 years to your life. 218 00:21:05,346 --> 00:21:09,749 I learned it from Keith Richards when I toured with the Stones. 219 00:21:15,222 --> 00:21:19,818 That may be why Keith cannot be killed by conventional weapons. 220 00:21:22,863 --> 00:21:26,924 - How can I be of assistance? - You're gonna think I'm nuts, but... 221 00:21:27,101 --> 00:21:29,160 ...someone visited me in a dream 222 00:21:29,337 --> 00:21:31,202 and told me that Del Preston 223 00:21:31,372 --> 00:21:34,102 would help me put on a concert in Aurora, Illinois. 224 00:21:34,275 --> 00:21:35,970 A concert? 225 00:21:38,546 --> 00:21:43,609 I'm afraid you've been misinformed. I don't do that any more. 226 00:21:47,021 --> 00:21:51,424 I'm just an old geezer. What do I know about music today? 227 00:21:51,592 --> 00:21:54,584 When I was working, it was all bands like Eric Clapton 228 00:21:54,762 --> 00:21:56,230 and the Rolling Stones. 229 00:21:56,398 --> 00:22:00,232 It's not like the Grateful Dead are still touring, is it? 230 00:22:00,402 --> 00:22:03,132 - Actually... - Garth. 231 00:22:06,108 --> 00:22:08,076 Look at this scrapbook. 232 00:22:09,411 --> 00:22:12,005 - That's you with led Zeppelin. - Yeah. 233 00:22:13,215 --> 00:22:14,944 My old lady put that together. 234 00:22:15,117 --> 00:22:17,677 We must've toured every concert hall and venue in America, 235 00:22:17,853 --> 00:22:20,981 me, my old lady and the road. 236 00:22:21,156 --> 00:22:23,522 - Is that you and Bob Dylan? - Yeah. 237 00:22:23,692 --> 00:22:26,490 - Who's the old lady? - That's my old lady. 238 00:22:27,929 --> 00:22:32,525 It was fun, but those days are gone forever. 239 00:22:32,701 --> 00:22:35,898 But we came from America just to talk to you. 240 00:22:36,071 --> 00:22:39,336 I'm sorry. I don't do concerts any more. 241 00:22:39,875 --> 00:22:41,342 Come on. Let's go. 242 00:22:44,112 --> 00:22:50,017 Well, I still think you led a really cool life. 243 00:22:51,153 --> 00:22:54,020 - It was nice meeting you. - I guess Jim was wrong. 244 00:22:57,459 --> 00:22:59,257 Hang about. 245 00:23:00,997 --> 00:23:03,397 Was it Jim Morrison? 246 00:23:03,566 --> 00:23:07,866 - Yes! - Did he have a naked Indian? 247 00:23:08,037 --> 00:23:12,201 - Yes! - I have to ask you... 248 00:23:12,375 --> 00:23:14,468 Didn't you think it was a trifle unnecessary 249 00:23:14,644 --> 00:23:16,976 to see the crack in the Indian's bottom? 250 00:23:17,146 --> 00:23:20,877 - Yes! Absolutely! - I had the same dream. 251 00:23:25,188 --> 00:23:29,955 - Del, you'll really love Aurora. - Who's Aurora, anyway? 252 00:23:30,326 --> 00:23:35,229 Frank, this is Bobby. Did you get the tape? 253 00:23:35,398 --> 00:23:39,459 What'd you think? Definitely. She sounds great. 254 00:23:40,603 --> 00:23:44,869 Yeah, the band is terrible. It's a garage band. 255 00:23:45,041 --> 00:23:47,373 They can't, I'm sure. 256 00:23:48,411 --> 00:23:51,812 I'm working with them. I'm still in this studio in Aurora. 257 00:23:51,981 --> 00:23:53,209 What the hell you doing there? 258 00:23:53,382 --> 00:23:56,317 - She wants to stay here. - Why? 259 00:23:56,486 --> 00:23:59,717 Same reason they all want to stay, she's got a boyfriend. 260 00:23:59,889 --> 00:24:03,382 Don't worry. I'll get rid of the boyfriend and the band. 261 00:24:03,560 --> 00:24:06,461 I'd like to finish the album in IA. 262 00:24:06,630 --> 00:24:09,531 All right, Bobby. Let's just get it done, OK? 263 00:24:13,937 --> 00:24:18,101 And there I am in Sri lanka, formerly Ceylon, at 3am, 264 00:24:18,275 --> 00:24:22,473 looking for 1,000 brown M&Ms to fill a brandy glass, 265 00:24:22,646 --> 00:24:25,342 or Ozzy wouldn't go on stage that night. 266 00:24:25,516 --> 00:24:28,747 Jeff Beck pops his head round the door 267 00:24:28,919 --> 00:24:32,616 and mentions there's a little sweet shop on the edge of town. 268 00:24:32,789 --> 00:24:35,121 We go, and it's closed. 269 00:24:35,292 --> 00:24:38,659 There's me and Keith Moon and David Crosby 270 00:24:38,829 --> 00:24:42,663 breaking into this little sweet shop, right? 271 00:24:42,833 --> 00:24:48,669 Instead of a guard dog, they've got this bloody great big Bengal tiger. 272 00:24:49,606 --> 00:24:53,804 I managed to take out the tiger with a can of mace, 273 00:24:53,977 --> 00:24:59,381 but the shop owner and his son, that's a different story altogether. 274 00:24:59,550 --> 00:25:03,817 I had to beat them to death with their own shoes. 275 00:25:05,490 --> 00:25:10,018 Nasty business, really, but sure enough, I got the M&Ms, 276 00:25:10,194 --> 00:25:14,153 and Ozzy went on stage and did a great show. 277 00:25:14,332 --> 00:25:16,766 That was excellent. 278 00:25:19,337 --> 00:25:21,771 To put on a really great rock show, 279 00:25:21,940 --> 00:25:26,138 like Knebworth in England or Woodstock, 280 00:25:26,311 --> 00:25:30,213 there is only one place you can do it, and that's here, 281 00:25:30,381 --> 00:25:35,683 at Adlai Stevenson Memorial Park, in the playing fields. 282 00:25:35,853 --> 00:25:37,787 We better go check it out. 283 00:25:43,094 --> 00:25:45,289 So, Wayne...? 284 00:25:45,830 --> 00:25:48,799 I hear you're putting on some kind of concert. 285 00:25:48,967 --> 00:25:54,098 That's good. People need to be entertained, need the distraction. 286 00:25:54,272 --> 00:25:58,606 I wish somebody'd do something to block out the voices in my head, 287 00:25:58,776 --> 00:26:01,074 the voices that scream over and over, 288 00:26:01,245 --> 00:26:05,239 "Why do they come to me to die? Why do they come to me to die?" 289 00:26:24,069 --> 00:26:28,403 - What do we do now? - Here. Let me look at it. 290 00:26:30,909 --> 00:26:32,968 Get the flashlight. 291 00:26:35,114 --> 00:26:40,575 OK. There's the main gate, and here we are. 292 00:26:40,753 --> 00:26:43,745 - No, we're over here. - I don't think so. 293 00:26:43,922 --> 00:26:46,948 We turned left at the gate, so that would put us... 294 00:26:47,126 --> 00:26:49,686 Garth! Wait a minute. 295 00:26:50,729 --> 00:26:54,631 I know where we are. I'm pretty good with maps. 296 00:26:58,404 --> 00:27:01,339 - Listen. - What? 297 00:27:07,146 --> 00:27:11,777 - Turn it off! - I can't turn it off! I can't turn it off! 298 00:27:19,626 --> 00:27:26,555 Waynestock? You'd purposely invite rock 'n' roll into our community? 299 00:27:27,734 --> 00:27:29,725 What's wrong with a little entertainment? 300 00:27:29,903 --> 00:27:33,339 Entertainment is fine, but this... 301 00:27:33,506 --> 00:27:36,202 We have lots of big acts that come through here. 302 00:27:36,376 --> 00:27:41,370 - Ice Capades, Tiny Toons, Kenny G... - Kenny G? 303 00:27:55,161 --> 00:27:58,858 We don't even get to apply for a permit? 304 00:27:59,032 --> 00:28:03,332 We would love to put on a rock concert... not! 305 00:28:07,774 --> 00:28:12,872 Betty Jo, could we have the permits for a festival, please? 306 00:28:13,914 --> 00:28:17,782 Thank you. You must fill out the necessary permit applications. 307 00:28:18,385 --> 00:28:21,718 Permit applications. 308 00:28:21,889 --> 00:28:24,517 - Here you go. - Thank you, Betty Jo. 309 00:28:27,695 --> 00:28:32,428 Hey, you're the guy that's on that Wayne World show. 310 00:28:33,868 --> 00:28:34,960 - Betty Jo? - Yeah? 311 00:28:35,136 --> 00:28:36,831 Thank you. 312 00:28:41,809 --> 00:28:47,372 All right. Naturally, you'll need the application for authorisation, 313 00:28:47,548 --> 00:28:52,383 approval from the guilds and unions, you'll need some release forms, 314 00:28:52,553 --> 00:28:57,650 the decibel level... What? Is something wrong? 315 00:29:00,361 --> 00:29:03,762 - What do you mean? - It's my eye, isn't it? 316 00:29:03,931 --> 00:29:06,365 Why would we want to look at your eye? 317 00:29:06,534 --> 00:29:10,061 Is there something wrong with that weird eye? 318 00:29:10,237 --> 00:29:14,334 There's nothing wrong with my eye. This one just has no pigment. 319 00:29:14,509 --> 00:29:18,070 I'm what you call a partial ocular albino, but I'm fine with it. 320 00:29:18,246 --> 00:29:21,306 I have perfect 20-20 vision with both eyes. 321 00:29:21,483 --> 00:29:24,577 You're serious about putting on a rock concert? 322 00:29:24,753 --> 00:29:26,311 Are you kidding? I'd give my right eye. 323 00:29:29,724 --> 00:29:34,184 You realise there are certain jurisdictions you'll need to follow. 324 00:29:34,362 --> 00:29:37,763 I'd like to think I have an eye for details. 325 00:29:40,936 --> 00:29:46,203 I'm assuming you have the $5,000 occupancy permit... 326 00:29:46,374 --> 00:29:49,070 ...or you wouldn't be here. - Exsqueeze me? 327 00:29:49,244 --> 00:29:53,442 Baking powder? $5,000 occupancy permit? 328 00:29:53,615 --> 00:29:57,073 Yes, we have that, actually. Piece of cake. 329 00:29:57,252 --> 00:30:00,779 Fine. Then all applications must be filled out in triplicate 330 00:30:00,956 --> 00:30:06,952 and returned at least 10 working days before the event, with the money. 331 00:30:07,128 --> 00:30:11,224 We'll run through these with a fine-toothed comb, 332 00:30:11,399 --> 00:30:14,163 cross the Ts and dot the... 333 00:30:17,373 --> 00:30:19,000 ...lower-case Js. 334 00:30:25,615 --> 00:30:30,314 I keep falling over. Oh, no. I'm falling over a lot. 335 00:30:30,853 --> 00:30:33,515 Damn these high heels. 336 00:30:34,957 --> 00:30:36,390 Cassandra...? 337 00:30:39,562 --> 00:30:43,362 - Why do you go out with me? - I love being with you. 338 00:30:43,532 --> 00:30:46,865 Most guys are jerks. You're a good person. 339 00:30:49,972 --> 00:30:53,499 Wait. Let me show you what I got at a garage sale. 340 00:30:53,676 --> 00:30:56,338 - Isn't that great? Heard of it? - Exsqueeze me? 341 00:30:56,512 --> 00:31:01,814 Have I ever seen this before? Everybody has Frampton Comes Alive. 342 00:31:01,984 --> 00:31:04,077 If you lived in the suburbs, you were issued it. 343 00:31:04,253 --> 00:31:06,744 It came in the mail with samples of Tide. 344 00:31:06,923 --> 00:31:09,721 Look at this old one. Gerry and the Pacemakers. 345 00:31:09,892 --> 00:31:14,420 That is old. I bet those guys actually have pacemakers by now. 346 00:31:15,398 --> 00:31:18,425 Can you believe they don't make vinyl anymore? It's weird, isn't it? 347 00:31:18,602 --> 00:31:22,038 - That is weird. - Bobby said my album won't be vinyl. 348 00:31:22,205 --> 00:31:25,936 Bobby says... Are you and Bobby having an affair? 349 00:31:26,109 --> 00:31:28,634 No, of course not. Where did you hear that? 350 00:31:28,812 --> 00:31:32,908 You know how these things start... one guy tells another guy something, 351 00:31:33,083 --> 00:31:37,417 then he tells two friends, and they tell two friends, 352 00:31:37,587 --> 00:31:42,456 and they tell their friends, and so on, and so on... 353 00:31:42,626 --> 00:31:47,495 - You know how it goes. - Honestly, I'm not having an affair. 354 00:31:47,664 --> 00:31:49,928 I'm nice to him because he's my producer. 355 00:31:50,100 --> 00:31:54,730 If this deal falls through, I lose my visa and I go back to Hong Kong. 356 00:31:54,905 --> 00:31:57,965 You have nothing to worry about. 357 00:31:58,141 --> 00:32:00,974 My dad's coming to visit. I'd love you to meet him. 358 00:32:01,144 --> 00:32:04,170 Treat. I'm sure he'll just love me. 359 00:32:04,348 --> 00:32:07,840 Yeah. If you're anything like my old boyfriend. 360 00:32:10,620 --> 00:32:14,317 - I'm nothing like him. - Then we're screwed. 361 00:32:15,359 --> 00:32:17,725 I haven't seen Garth in a while. What's he up to? 362 00:32:17,894 --> 00:32:19,522 Garth's doing his laundry. 363 00:32:19,697 --> 00:32:22,723 Too bad he doesn't have a girlfriend to do his laundry. 364 00:32:22,900 --> 00:32:25,869 Yeah. Thanks for doing my laundry. 365 00:32:26,037 --> 00:32:29,438 How do you get my clothes so white and fresh-smelling? 366 00:32:29,607 --> 00:32:32,872 It's an old Cantonese method few people know about. 367 00:32:34,479 --> 00:32:40,679 Wait a minute. Calgon? Ancient Chinese secret? 368 00:33:05,443 --> 00:33:06,671 Hello. 369 00:33:07,812 --> 00:33:09,040 Hi. 370 00:33:10,181 --> 00:33:15,551 - I don't recall ever seeing you in here. - It's my first time in here. 371 00:33:15,720 --> 00:33:19,417 That's right. My mom used to do all my laundry, but I do now. 372 00:33:19,590 --> 00:33:22,389 I'm what you call "sans parents". 373 00:33:23,796 --> 00:33:26,890 I can go to a movie on a school night, like that. 374 00:33:29,935 --> 00:33:32,563 Welcome to the neighbourhood. 375 00:33:38,644 --> 00:33:41,374 Would you like some red rope liquorice? 376 00:33:42,114 --> 00:33:43,979 Sure. 377 00:33:55,260 --> 00:33:59,754 - What's your name? - Garth Algar. What's yours? 378 00:34:01,533 --> 00:34:04,969 - I'm Honey... Horn�e. - Nice to meet you, Miss Horny. 379 00:34:05,137 --> 00:34:08,368 That's Horn�e. It's French. 380 00:34:08,540 --> 00:34:12,533 OK, Miss Horn�e. 381 00:34:13,278 --> 00:34:16,736 Garth, would you like to have dinner some night? 382 00:34:16,915 --> 00:34:18,815 I like to have dinner every night. 383 00:34:18,984 --> 00:34:23,444 No, I mean us. You and me. Would you like to have dinner? 384 00:34:25,992 --> 00:34:28,119 A date? 385 00:34:30,663 --> 00:34:33,996 Finally. It took, like, two hours. 386 00:34:50,917 --> 00:34:55,354 I like 'em teeny and toasty. So long. 387 00:34:56,456 --> 00:34:58,856 - Bye. - Bye. 388 00:34:59,893 --> 00:35:03,260 - Maybe we'll see each other around. - Yeah. See you around. 389 00:35:07,033 --> 00:35:08,933 You forgot these. 390 00:35:20,880 --> 00:35:22,745 Good night, Cassandra. Good work. 391 00:35:22,916 --> 00:35:25,646 - Thanks. See you tomorrow. - Good night. 392 00:35:27,288 --> 00:35:31,952 I have got to get you to IA. You are buried here. 393 00:35:32,126 --> 00:35:35,118 I like it here. All my friends are here. 394 00:35:35,296 --> 00:35:38,459 - What time is it? - 10:35. 395 00:35:38,632 --> 00:35:41,726 Damn. I missed the start of Wayne's show. 396 00:35:42,736 --> 00:35:46,035 OK. We're in a doll factory, right? 397 00:35:46,207 --> 00:35:48,767 It reminds me of that movie The Leprechaun, 398 00:35:48,943 --> 00:35:52,037 with that little guy that goes, "I'm the leprechaun." 399 00:35:52,213 --> 00:35:55,671 - Garth, I'm the leprechaun! - Cool it, OK? 400 00:35:55,849 --> 00:35:59,046 - I'm the leprechaun! - Stop it, all right? 401 00:35:59,220 --> 00:36:01,654 Don't try and steal me pot o' gold. 402 00:36:01,822 --> 00:36:05,519 - Why do you like these guys? - Because they're fun. 403 00:36:05,693 --> 00:36:07,627 If I wanted a guy that was all ambition, 404 00:36:07,795 --> 00:36:11,822 I could've stayed in Hong Kong. Those guys are 12 for 10 cents. 405 00:36:11,999 --> 00:36:15,230 - You mean a dime a dozen. - Maybe where you shop. 406 00:36:15,402 --> 00:36:18,030 I think you underestimate them. They're really sharp. 407 00:36:18,205 --> 00:36:21,072 - Stop it, leprechaun man! - Garth, chill! 408 00:36:21,242 --> 00:36:22,766 What did those monsters do to you? 409 00:36:22,943 --> 00:36:27,004 - I'm not... - Sweetie. Sweetie. 410 00:36:27,181 --> 00:36:31,915 Come on, sweetie. Come on. Pixie dust. Pixie dust. 411 00:36:32,087 --> 00:36:34,146 Sweetie, it's me... 412 00:36:34,322 --> 00:36:36,347 - The leprechaun! - No! 413 00:36:36,524 --> 00:36:38,515 I'm the leprechaun. 414 00:36:38,693 --> 00:36:40,786 Yeah. These guys, really sharp. 415 00:36:40,962 --> 00:36:45,262 I'm scared! Want to leave, but can't. 416 00:36:45,433 --> 00:36:47,924 - Want to move. - Where you gonna move? 417 00:36:48,103 --> 00:36:49,730 - You gonna move to Ireland? - No! 418 00:36:49,904 --> 00:36:50,962 'Cause I'm a leprechaun... 419 00:36:53,508 --> 00:36:54,736 Wayne, we're here! 420 00:36:57,512 --> 00:36:59,912 Here. Let me get the gate for you. 421 00:37:00,081 --> 00:37:05,644 All righty. Come on in. Nice digs, huh? 422 00:37:08,456 --> 00:37:10,856 Cassandra, you look hot. 423 00:37:12,494 --> 00:37:14,485 Sorry. 424 00:37:14,663 --> 00:37:18,656 I'd like you to meet my father, Mr Wong. 425 00:37:18,833 --> 00:37:21,666 Please meet you acquaintance, Wayne Campbell. 426 00:38:10,619 --> 00:38:14,350 Very well, if that is your custom. Prepare to die. 427 00:38:36,713 --> 00:38:40,774 I know all seven animal styles The crane. The stag. 428 00:38:40,951 --> 00:38:42,680 The horse. The tiger. 429 00:38:42,853 --> 00:38:45,822 The bat. The rat. The monkey. 430 00:38:45,989 --> 00:38:49,083 The beetle. I will take you, old man. 431 00:39:42,713 --> 00:39:45,443 Your tongue is quick. But your sword? 432 00:39:45,616 --> 00:39:48,710 - Oh, no. - Wayne! 433 00:40:26,090 --> 00:40:28,991 Hello? Can we talk later? This is not a good time. 434 00:40:29,160 --> 00:40:32,061 Just a moment. I've got call-waiting. 435 00:40:32,230 --> 00:40:33,629 Hello. Yes? 436 00:40:33,798 --> 00:40:36,494 Can I call you back? I am on the other line. 437 00:40:38,537 --> 00:40:41,768 Yes, he received a Sports Illustrated football phone. 438 00:41:00,626 --> 00:41:01,854 Wayne, no! 439 00:41:05,397 --> 00:41:09,197 You've impressed me. You're worthy of my daughter. 440 00:41:16,208 --> 00:41:18,369 We got a party tomorrow at Komrades. 441 00:41:18,544 --> 00:41:20,705 It's kind of a fundraiser for Waynestock. 442 00:41:20,879 --> 00:41:25,873 Right. There'll be a $ 10 cover charge. It'll be a big party. 443 00:41:26,051 --> 00:41:29,646 Because it's at Komrades, we're calling it a Communist party. 444 00:41:38,196 --> 00:41:41,758 I remember one time I was in a place like this. 445 00:41:41,935 --> 00:41:46,872 Sri lanka. Formerly Ceylon. It was about three in the morning. 446 00:41:47,040 --> 00:41:51,704 I was looking for 1,000 brown M&Ms to fill a brandy glass, 447 00:41:51,878 --> 00:41:54,346 or Ozzy wouldn't go on stage that night. 448 00:41:55,214 --> 00:41:57,842 Jeff Beck pops his head round the door 449 00:41:58,017 --> 00:42:01,783 and mentions there's a little sweet shop on the edge of town. 450 00:42:01,955 --> 00:42:05,288 - Wayne! Garth! - Milton! How's it going? 451 00:42:05,458 --> 00:42:10,486 Awesome party! Good tunes, good brew, good buddies. 452 00:42:10,663 --> 00:42:13,632 I feel great, man. I feel great! 453 00:42:13,800 --> 00:42:17,600 I don't know, man. I hate my father. I hate my life. 454 00:42:17,770 --> 00:42:20,705 But I feel great. You guys are great. 455 00:42:22,976 --> 00:42:25,501 I'm gonna go pick a fight. 456 00:42:27,280 --> 00:42:29,043 He's gotten a lot better. 457 00:42:29,215 --> 00:42:31,274 - Way better. - Yeah. 458 00:42:32,585 --> 00:42:36,316 - Thank you. - I'll be back in a bit. 459 00:42:41,694 --> 00:42:44,562 - How's it going? - Hi. 460 00:42:45,699 --> 00:42:47,599 It's looking good, Campbell. 461 00:42:47,768 --> 00:42:50,032 - I'll be at the bar. - Good. 462 00:42:50,204 --> 00:42:52,729 I'm so glad you made it. You look amazing! 463 00:42:52,906 --> 00:42:57,036 I see. Wait. I have great news. 464 00:42:57,211 --> 00:42:59,702 Bobby's taking me to IA to do the final mix on my album. 465 00:42:59,880 --> 00:43:05,910 - Isn't that terrific? - That's great. I'm ecstatic. 466 00:43:06,086 --> 00:43:10,079 I'm beside myself with joy. Hooray for Hollywood. 467 00:43:10,257 --> 00:43:12,555 Living on your own has its perks. 468 00:43:12,726 --> 00:43:15,957 Your mom doesn't tell you to turn down the stereo. 469 00:43:16,130 --> 00:43:18,291 That's a real drag. 470 00:43:18,465 --> 00:43:22,697 Because moms genetically hate music played at the appropriate level. 471 00:43:22,870 --> 00:43:25,430 And my dad, forget it. 472 00:43:25,606 --> 00:43:29,133 He'd ruin a led Zeppelin reunion concert. 473 00:43:29,309 --> 00:43:32,710 He hates music at the correct level. 474 00:43:32,880 --> 00:43:37,715 But the shopkeeper and his son was a different story altogether. 475 00:43:39,286 --> 00:43:43,222 I had to beat them to death with their own shoes. 476 00:43:45,226 --> 00:43:48,491 - What's the deal with Bobby? - Wayne? 477 00:43:50,465 --> 00:43:53,593 It's getting a little out of hand. I think you better say something. 478 00:43:53,768 --> 00:43:56,965 Good call. Everybody, I'd like to say something! 479 00:43:57,138 --> 00:44:00,164 Excuse me. Everybody, can I get your attention? 480 00:44:00,341 --> 00:44:03,208 I'd like to say something. Keep it down. 481 00:44:05,080 --> 00:44:07,514 We're really glad you could all make it. 482 00:44:07,682 --> 00:44:13,279 We never knew we had so many friends who believed in this concert idea. 483 00:44:13,455 --> 00:44:16,117 When we first had this idea of putting on this shindig, 484 00:44:16,291 --> 00:44:18,782 we didn't know if anyone would come. 485 00:44:18,960 --> 00:44:23,021 But look... You're all here, pitching in. 486 00:44:24,232 --> 00:44:26,826 I promised myself I wouldn't cry. 487 00:44:31,906 --> 00:44:33,498 Party on! 488 00:45:22,792 --> 00:45:26,455 Garth, I'm starting to get a bad feeling, man. 489 00:45:26,629 --> 00:45:29,120 I think something's going on. 490 00:45:40,910 --> 00:45:45,176 Hello. Yes? Is this Aerosmith's tour manager? 491 00:45:45,347 --> 00:45:48,942 It is? Hello. My name is Wayne Campbell. 492 00:45:49,118 --> 00:45:51,713 You don't know me. I'm not mental or anything. 493 00:45:51,888 --> 00:45:56,848 I'm putting on a concert in Aurora, Illinois. Yes, I can hold. 494 00:45:57,928 --> 00:46:01,364 Del, look. For years I thought this was a Mercedes emblem. 495 00:46:01,531 --> 00:46:04,523 Woodstock? That was quite a show, man. 496 00:46:04,701 --> 00:46:08,364 - You were at Woodstock? - Excellent. What was it like? 497 00:46:09,039 --> 00:46:13,738 It rained all morning and then it cleared up in the afternoon. 498 00:46:15,645 --> 00:46:18,944 That's it. I almost remembered something else, but it's gone. 499 00:46:19,115 --> 00:46:22,175 You can't remember what it was? Still holding. I want... 500 00:46:23,753 --> 00:46:28,520 - Wayne, look what I made. - Good work, my friend. 501 00:46:31,595 --> 00:46:33,756 You guys got the permit applications? 502 00:46:36,099 --> 00:46:38,727 Got the money? 503 00:46:38,902 --> 00:46:43,896 Good for you. Most people just take them and never come back. 504 00:47:05,663 --> 00:47:08,257 Position 1 to Position 2. Do you copy? 505 00:47:09,533 --> 00:47:12,764 This is Position 2 in position. Position 3, what's your position? 506 00:47:12,937 --> 00:47:15,371 Position 3. I read you. 507 00:47:15,539 --> 00:47:20,374 - Position 4, do you copy? Over. - 4 copies. Back to Position 1. Over. 508 00:47:20,544 --> 00:47:23,570 I've to go to IA for a couple of days. 509 00:47:23,748 --> 00:47:26,945 If you need anything... I'm at this number. 510 00:47:36,961 --> 00:47:40,556 Position 1 to Position 2. Did you see that? 511 00:47:40,731 --> 00:47:45,725 This is Position 2 in position! Sorry, man. I didn't see anything. 512 00:47:49,006 --> 00:47:50,974 What is it? 513 00:47:54,146 --> 00:47:56,808 Abort! We have been identified! 514 00:48:00,819 --> 00:48:03,720 Abandon positions! 515 00:48:08,026 --> 00:48:10,426 Wayne, let's run away! 516 00:48:33,819 --> 00:48:37,585 Garth, it's locked! In here! 517 00:49:03,116 --> 00:49:04,743 The Tool Box 518 00:49:19,766 --> 00:49:22,166 Come on! Let's go! 519 00:49:45,058 --> 00:49:48,084 Do it, Miss Thing! Do it! Do it! 520 00:50:17,624 --> 00:50:19,649 Get it, girl! Get it, girl! 521 00:51:20,989 --> 00:51:26,222 What's the matter? You look like you want to say something to me. 522 00:51:26,394 --> 00:51:29,557 - I think we should break up. - What? Why? 523 00:51:29,731 --> 00:51:35,226 Because there comes a time when people should go their separate ways. 524 00:51:35,403 --> 00:51:42,366 I mean, I've got Waynestock, you've got your career and your producer, 525 00:51:42,544 --> 00:51:46,981 and I just think it's time that we should see other people. 526 00:51:49,450 --> 00:51:51,247 I don't want to see other people. 527 00:51:51,419 --> 00:51:54,252 - What about Bobby? - What about him? 528 00:51:54,422 --> 00:51:59,291 Come on! Do you think I'm a gullibull or even a gullicalf? 529 00:51:59,460 --> 00:52:01,690 I've no idea what you're talking about. 530 00:52:01,863 --> 00:52:05,698 Right! Come on, now! What about these? 531 00:52:12,608 --> 00:52:15,475 - Where did these come from? - I did a little detective work. 532 00:52:15,644 --> 00:52:19,512 - You did spy on me. - Yes, I did. 533 00:52:23,085 --> 00:52:24,143 Easy. 534 00:52:26,622 --> 00:52:28,783 I think she took that well. 535 00:52:30,593 --> 00:52:31,890 Let's go. 536 00:52:35,231 --> 00:52:38,098 Ladies and gentlemen! 537 00:52:39,802 --> 00:52:45,741 Your roadie training begins today. It will not be easy. 538 00:52:45,908 --> 00:52:50,174 You will get tired. You will get blisters. 539 00:52:50,346 --> 00:52:56,046 You will get aches and pains. But you will also get good. 540 00:52:59,088 --> 00:53:01,249 - Are you ready? - Yes, sir! 541 00:53:01,423 --> 00:53:04,517 Roadies present and accounted for, sir! 542 00:53:06,029 --> 00:53:07,826 Let's begin. 543 00:53:13,103 --> 00:53:16,903 Eye on the task! Come on. Let's go! 544 00:53:22,612 --> 00:53:24,079 Jesus! It's crazy! 545 00:53:26,016 --> 00:53:27,779 They're getting better, Del. Look. 546 00:53:37,294 --> 00:53:39,057 Get that microphone! 547 00:53:45,902 --> 00:53:49,929 You're worthless! You're less than nothing! 548 00:53:50,106 --> 00:53:53,098 What's keeping you here? You don't belong here! 549 00:53:53,276 --> 00:53:59,374 - Why don't you just quit? - 'Cause I got no place else to go! 550 00:54:18,769 --> 00:54:22,899 Thanks for coming in with me. I'm always afraid to come in by myself. 551 00:54:30,448 --> 00:54:34,111 Come. Come on. 552 00:54:40,524 --> 00:54:43,152 Come on. Sit down. 553 00:54:45,963 --> 00:54:48,864 And I'll fix us a little drink, OK? 554 00:55:16,795 --> 00:55:19,992 There you are. An Old Fashioned. 555 00:55:24,403 --> 00:55:27,304 This Coke's gone bad. 556 00:55:28,874 --> 00:55:32,401 I just love a man with a sense of humour. 557 00:55:32,577 --> 00:55:34,204 - You know what I wish? - What? 558 00:55:34,379 --> 00:55:38,873 I wish I could climb inside that big brain of yours and just walk around. 559 00:55:39,451 --> 00:55:41,419 Really? 560 00:55:41,586 --> 00:55:43,417 - You know what I love? - What? 561 00:55:43,588 --> 00:55:47,524 I love the way those big, thick glasses magnify your pupils. 562 00:55:48,427 --> 00:55:50,088 Look at me. 563 00:55:52,297 --> 00:55:56,324 I'll bet you like to be in control. Tell me. 564 00:55:56,501 --> 00:56:00,904 When I was 17, my little sister tried to borrow my Def leppard record. 565 00:56:01,072 --> 00:56:05,600 - I said, "No way." - That's just what I'm talking about. 566 00:56:08,079 --> 00:56:12,779 - Oh, my God. You're so limber. - Don't you just love music? 567 00:56:20,159 --> 00:56:22,252 Do you have any Megadeth? 568 00:56:34,607 --> 00:56:38,236 - Come with me. - I'm blind. 569 00:56:52,058 --> 00:56:54,492 I'm dancing. 570 00:56:57,129 --> 00:56:59,097 You're real squiggly. 571 00:57:04,670 --> 00:57:07,002 - Did you hurt yourself? - Yeah. 572 00:57:07,173 --> 00:57:10,802 - Let me see. Oh. There. - That's it. Yeah. 573 00:57:12,011 --> 00:57:17,109 Feel naughty. Feel naughty. I thought I saw a puddy cat. 574 00:57:17,284 --> 00:57:19,252 Boldly go where no man has gone before. 575 00:57:19,419 --> 00:57:23,685 - There's got to be a way to find... - Take me, Garth. 576 00:57:23,857 --> 00:57:26,758 Where? I'm low on gas and you need a jacket. 577 00:57:26,927 --> 00:57:30,954 - I'm gonna be frank. - OK. Can I still be Garth? 578 00:57:31,131 --> 00:57:32,530 Shut up and kiss me. 579 00:58:04,531 --> 00:58:07,159 Can I have some cocoa later? 580 00:58:16,843 --> 00:58:20,610 Good morning, darling. I trust you slept well. 581 00:58:20,782 --> 00:58:22,875 I hope I wasn't too much of an animal. 582 00:58:25,186 --> 00:58:29,520 - Come. Hold me. - You know I will. 583 00:58:33,528 --> 00:58:34,756 Party on. 584 00:58:36,664 --> 00:58:39,861 He's bobbing. He's weaving. He winds up! 585 00:58:40,335 --> 00:58:42,462 Outside! 586 00:58:48,176 --> 00:58:50,542 - Are you all right? - Women. 587 00:58:50,712 --> 00:58:54,944 I feel like I'm in the delete bin of life, next to Mahogany Rush. 588 00:58:56,150 --> 00:59:01,611 I'm sorry. Relationships aren't for the timid. 589 00:59:03,024 --> 00:59:04,992 And I should know. 590 00:59:06,794 --> 00:59:10,855 For I'm no longer a stranger in the ways of the woman. 591 00:59:11,032 --> 00:59:14,900 All right, man, all right. Good work, my friend. 592 00:59:15,069 --> 00:59:19,199 - On that note, game on. - Game on! 593 00:59:20,709 --> 00:59:22,142 All right! 594 00:59:22,311 --> 00:59:26,941 He's wheeling. He's dealing. He shoots! He scores! 595 00:59:28,050 --> 00:59:33,886 OK. Ladies and gentlemen, it takes two people to run a concert. 596 00:59:34,056 --> 00:59:40,291 One backstage and one out front. Two. 597 00:59:41,163 --> 00:59:45,327 One man alone cannot do this. 598 00:59:45,501 --> 00:59:48,664 Wayne, you will run the backstage team. 599 00:59:49,271 --> 00:59:54,299 Milton, you are the liaison between Wayne's backstage team 600 00:59:54,476 --> 00:59:59,675 and Garth's frontstage team, which includes myself in the booth. 601 01:00:00,182 --> 01:00:04,482 To the left and the right of the stage are the machine gun nests, 602 01:00:04,653 --> 01:00:06,314 belt-fed M-60 Brownings. 603 01:00:06,488 --> 01:00:10,686 These babies tend to heat up, so shoot in three-second bursts. 604 01:00:10,859 --> 01:00:13,327 In the event of capture, 605 01:00:13,495 --> 01:00:16,692 I will personally distribute cyanide capsules, 606 01:00:16,865 --> 01:00:21,632 to be placed under the tongue like so. Any questions? 607 01:00:21,805 --> 01:00:26,037 Yeah. I have a question. When did you turn into a nut bar? 608 01:00:32,382 --> 01:00:36,113 Thank you, Mr Scream. I'm gonna be joined by Wayne and Garth, 609 01:00:36,286 --> 01:00:40,518 giving us the low-down on the Waynestock concert. 610 01:00:40,690 --> 01:00:44,626 Hi. We're here to see Handsome Dan. I'm Wayne Campbell. 611 01:00:44,794 --> 01:00:49,629 Ja. I know. We've been expecting you, Wayne Campbell. I am Bjergen Kjergen. 612 01:00:49,799 --> 01:00:51,994 I love your accent. Where are you from? 613 01:00:52,168 --> 01:00:55,831 - I am from Sweden. - Really? Where abouts in Sweden? 614 01:00:56,005 --> 01:00:58,064 Knuergen, near the Bjoergen Fjords. 615 01:00:58,241 --> 01:01:00,505 Nice to meet you, Bjergen Kjergen 616 01:01:00,677 --> 01:01:03,373 from Knuergen near the Bjoergen Fjords. 617 01:01:03,546 --> 01:01:07,482 Knuergen...? That's Kluergen province, near Bibuergen River. 618 01:01:07,650 --> 01:01:10,312 - Ja. - Now correct me if I'm wrong. 619 01:01:10,487 --> 01:01:15,925 Your rainfall varies from 40 inches in the winter to 200 in summer. 620 01:01:16,092 --> 01:01:18,822 And your chief export is modular furniture. 621 01:01:18,995 --> 01:01:21,725 I did a project on Sweden in the eighth grade. 622 01:01:21,898 --> 01:01:25,062 I am impressed with your quest for knowledge. 623 01:01:25,236 --> 01:01:29,969 - Educated men are rare. - I was up all night working on it. 624 01:01:30,141 --> 01:01:31,540 Then the next day in gym class, 625 01:01:31,709 --> 01:01:34,906 I was on the minitramp, and I got diarrhoea. 626 01:01:37,381 --> 01:01:39,542 I really wish I hadn't told you that. 627 01:01:39,717 --> 01:01:44,450 I am sorry to hear of your illness, but since you've sacrificed 628 01:01:44,622 --> 01:01:49,116 your health for knowledge of my country, I find you very attractive. 629 01:01:49,293 --> 01:01:53,491 I hope to make love to you in the near future. 630 01:01:55,499 --> 01:01:59,458 OK. All right. OK. All right. 631 01:02:00,771 --> 01:02:02,636 Dick Van Dyke Show. 632 01:02:05,976 --> 01:02:08,672 - Good work, my friend. - Yeah. 633 01:02:11,749 --> 01:02:16,311 - Are you wearing Brut? - Yes. 634 01:02:16,487 --> 01:02:19,513 My woman likes me in cologne. 635 01:02:19,690 --> 01:02:23,251 Wayne, Garth, let me get my headset off. I'll be right out. 636 01:02:30,502 --> 01:02:33,528 Hi, Handsome Dan. It's great to meet you. 637 01:02:33,705 --> 01:02:40,406 - I'm not Handsome Dan. - Hi. Hey. 638 01:02:41,313 --> 01:02:45,181 - Hi... - Handsome Dan. 639 01:02:50,255 --> 01:02:54,316 Back with you on WPIG, maximum grunt. 640 01:02:55,360 --> 01:02:58,329 Our special guests, Wayne Campbell, Garth Algar. 641 01:02:58,496 --> 01:03:00,225 Wayne's World, all right. 642 01:03:00,398 --> 01:03:03,890 Waynestock. Big event. Everybody's excited. 643 01:03:04,069 --> 01:03:08,062 It's gonna be a big concert at Adlai Stevenson Park. 644 01:03:08,240 --> 01:03:13,143 - A big party with some great bands. - Like Aerosmith. 645 01:03:13,812 --> 01:03:19,648 - There's still tickets left. - Don't wait till the last minute. 646 01:03:20,485 --> 01:03:24,444 'Cause it's a chance for the city of Aurora... 647 01:03:24,623 --> 01:03:27,615 To do something... 648 01:03:28,326 --> 01:03:29,692 Fun. 649 01:03:29,862 --> 01:03:34,663 - And to put the city on the map. - It's a lot of work. 650 01:03:34,834 --> 01:03:39,294 - Work is hard. - You're not listening, are you? 651 01:03:40,339 --> 01:03:43,866 I could say anything, like "you're a complete tool". 652 01:03:44,043 --> 01:03:49,504 You wouldn't hear, 'cause you're a freak with a microphone. 653 01:03:50,283 --> 01:03:53,810 It's not challenging any more. It's like shooting fish in a barrel. 654 01:03:53,986 --> 01:03:59,322 - True, Sphincter Boy? - What? Oh. They're getting closer. 655 01:03:59,492 --> 01:04:03,394 Good information about Waynestock. We'll be back after PIG sports. 656 01:04:03,562 --> 01:04:07,760 It's 16 minutes past the big hour. Right, Mr Scream? 657 01:04:12,805 --> 01:04:15,899 Great. Good stuff. I think people are getting cranked. 658 01:04:24,083 --> 01:04:29,453 - Hi. Bobby, it's Wayne Campbell. - Wayne. How'd you get this number? 659 01:04:29,622 --> 01:04:33,650 It was written on the back of a business card. 660 01:04:33,827 --> 01:04:38,025 I'm looking for Cassandra. I have to talk to her. It's really important. 661 01:04:38,198 --> 01:04:39,722 I haven't seen her. 662 01:04:39,900 --> 01:04:43,859 She said she might come to IA. She wasn't definite. 663 01:04:45,472 --> 01:04:47,337 If I hear anything, I'll let you know. 664 01:04:47,507 --> 01:04:51,307 I have to go. I'm with someone. I'm sorry I couldn't help. 665 01:04:51,478 --> 01:04:54,936 OK. Thanks. Bye. 666 01:04:57,651 --> 01:05:02,281 - Important call? - Some small-time promoter. 667 01:05:09,429 --> 01:05:11,488 Let's get some lunch. 668 01:05:44,098 --> 01:05:47,727 What you're saying is that Peter lawford warned Kennedy 669 01:05:47,902 --> 01:05:50,632 not to mess with the military-industrial complex. 670 01:05:50,805 --> 01:05:56,334 Yeah. Dig this, man... J Edgar Hoover was one bad cat. 671 01:05:56,511 --> 01:05:59,639 I mean, he had a completely different bag from Jack. 672 01:05:59,814 --> 01:06:04,649 He just couldn't groove. When two cats can't groove to the same tune, 673 01:06:04,819 --> 01:06:08,118 one of them has to visit the man upstairs. 674 01:06:08,289 --> 01:06:10,849 That's amazing, man. Excuse me. 675 01:06:11,025 --> 01:06:16,053 Wayne, I want you to meet a friend of mine, Sammy Davis Jr. 676 01:06:16,230 --> 01:06:19,097 - Nice to meet you, Mr Jr. - Nice to meet you, too, man. 677 01:06:19,267 --> 01:06:22,327 I gotta split. I got some cats I gotta hang with. 678 01:06:22,503 --> 01:06:26,030 Bye, Sammy. He's a good man. 679 01:06:26,808 --> 01:06:29,470 And now, Wayne, what can I do you for? 680 01:06:29,644 --> 01:06:31,805 Listen, Jim, I'm really confused, OK? 681 01:06:31,979 --> 01:06:34,743 We haven't sold any tickets, we have no bands, 682 01:06:34,916 --> 01:06:39,013 Garth is distracted by chicks, I broke up with my girlfriend, 683 01:06:39,188 --> 01:06:42,180 and on top of that, Del's gone completely mental. 684 01:06:42,357 --> 01:06:46,350 To complete your journey, you have to help some people along the way. 685 01:06:46,528 --> 01:06:49,827 This next little bit, you'll have to go it alone. 686 01:06:49,998 --> 01:06:51,625 Keep the faith, my friend. 687 01:06:51,800 --> 01:06:57,102 If you book them, they will come. Hey, Sammy, wait up. 688 01:06:59,475 --> 01:07:01,943 Jim, what if nobody shows up? 689 01:07:16,225 --> 01:07:19,023 Sand. Cool. 690 01:07:23,031 --> 01:07:27,434 Right. Right, Moe. I understand. 691 01:07:27,603 --> 01:07:31,369 - Nervous? - A little. 692 01:07:31,540 --> 01:07:33,201 I've never been on The Tonight Show before. 693 01:07:33,375 --> 01:07:35,741 Nothing to worry about. After the show... 694 01:07:35,911 --> 01:07:38,710 I have to fly to Aurora, to Waynestock. 695 01:07:38,882 --> 01:07:41,942 Waynestock? What's this Waynestock thing? 696 01:07:42,118 --> 01:07:46,316 - Nothing. Something she has to do. - Hold on a second, Moe. 697 01:07:46,489 --> 01:07:50,482 Listen, Bobby's put together some great musicians. 698 01:07:50,660 --> 01:07:55,097 You're making a great album. Together, it can't miss. 699 01:07:55,265 --> 01:07:57,859 You're in good hands. He's the best. 700 01:07:58,034 --> 01:08:00,628 You listen to Bobby and you'll be a big star. 701 01:08:00,803 --> 01:08:05,297 A big star. Moe? Yeah. 702 01:08:06,509 --> 01:08:09,740 We're almost out of time, but I'd just like to point out 703 01:08:09,913 --> 01:08:15,476 there are still plenty of excellent Waynestock tickets still available. 704 01:08:15,652 --> 01:08:18,177 Actually, there are about 10,000 705 01:08:18,354 --> 01:08:21,221 excellent Waynestock tickets still available. 706 01:08:21,391 --> 01:08:23,416 And I'd also like to address a rumour. 707 01:08:23,593 --> 01:08:27,495 There's this rumour that none of the bands have signed 708 01:08:27,664 --> 01:08:30,497 and probably no one's gonna show up. 709 01:08:30,667 --> 01:08:33,465 It's true that none of the bands have signed. 710 01:08:33,636 --> 01:08:36,196 Jim Morrison and his weird naked Indian friend 711 01:08:36,372 --> 01:08:40,707 visited me in the night and assured me that all the bands will come. 712 01:08:40,878 --> 01:08:44,644 That's all the time we have this week, so until then... 713 01:08:44,815 --> 01:08:47,750 - Party on, Garth. - Party on, Wayne. 714 01:08:55,159 --> 01:08:57,787 - And we're clear. - All right! 715 01:09:00,664 --> 01:09:05,966 I don't know if you should mention that Jim Morrison thing any more. 716 01:09:06,136 --> 01:09:09,799 Yeah. It's just that people have started to talk. 717 01:09:09,974 --> 01:09:11,532 They're saying things like, 718 01:09:11,709 --> 01:09:14,576 "Hey, there goes Garth and his friend Wayne..." 719 01:09:15,579 --> 01:09:17,308 "...the psychopath." 720 01:09:17,815 --> 01:09:20,648 It's embarrassing. No offence or nothing. 721 01:09:20,818 --> 01:09:23,309 No. None taken. 722 01:09:25,389 --> 01:09:27,050 I believe this knife is yours. 723 01:09:29,927 --> 01:09:34,159 It's just that things have started to look a little bleak. 724 01:09:34,331 --> 01:09:37,858 Bleak? What? Hey, no guff, Chet. 725 01:09:38,035 --> 01:09:40,469 Until you pointed that out, it hadn't occurred to me. 726 01:09:40,638 --> 01:09:43,540 - Where you going? - Mikita's. 727 01:09:43,708 --> 01:09:47,303 - The usual. Are you coming? - No. You guys go and have fun. 728 01:09:47,479 --> 01:09:50,209 I'd probably end up embarrassing you anyways. 729 01:09:50,382 --> 01:09:54,842 No, no. I'm just gonna to stay here and lick the cat's butt. 730 01:09:58,757 --> 01:10:03,558 Just 15-20 minutes three times a week can really make a difference... 731 01:10:03,728 --> 01:10:08,597 - And all the other products? - Joe, you know the price. 29.95. 732 01:10:12,170 --> 01:10:14,161 That song is from your album. 733 01:10:14,339 --> 01:10:17,433 Oh, man. She looks great. 734 01:10:17,609 --> 01:10:21,602 It should be out next month, or we hope it will be. 735 01:10:21,780 --> 01:10:25,272 Who's we? Who are you looking at? Let's see the guy. 736 01:10:25,450 --> 01:10:30,649 - That's Bobby Cahn, my producer. - That fine-looking man? 737 01:10:30,822 --> 01:10:32,756 I'm in the wrong business. I should be a record producer. 738 01:10:32,924 --> 01:10:36,917 Then I'd have attractive women smiling at me. 739 01:10:38,730 --> 01:10:44,930 She will be mine again. Oh, yes. She will be mine again. 740 01:10:46,605 --> 01:10:49,403 - You were terrific. They loved you. - You think so? 741 01:10:49,575 --> 01:10:52,305 Listen to them. They loved you. Me, too. 742 01:10:52,478 --> 01:10:56,642 I didn't think I could do it without my band. Your guys were so hot. 743 01:10:56,816 --> 01:11:01,082 - Damn, I had fun. - Good. Let's celebrate. 744 01:11:01,253 --> 01:11:06,589 - Did you think about what I said? - Yeah. I'm still thinking about it. 745 01:11:07,393 --> 01:11:10,487 - Give me a week? - OK. 746 01:11:13,232 --> 01:11:15,700 W-what's the matter? Is anything wrong? 747 01:11:20,039 --> 01:11:21,870 Garth, I'm so scared. 748 01:11:22,041 --> 01:11:24,134 Has someone hurt you? I'll take care of it. 749 01:11:24,310 --> 01:11:27,006 I'm a grown-up now, you know. 750 01:11:27,179 --> 01:11:32,981 - It's... It's my husband. - Your what? 751 01:11:33,152 --> 01:11:37,384 Darling. I meant to tell you, but my divorce isn't final, 752 01:11:37,556 --> 01:11:41,583 and he came over here yesterday, and he was crazy, like an animal. 753 01:11:41,761 --> 01:11:46,858 - I wish someone would kill him. - You mean, kill your husband? 754 01:11:47,334 --> 01:11:51,168 No! Don't say it. You mustn't even think it. 755 01:11:51,338 --> 01:11:54,830 I know you love me, but I won't let you kill my husband. 756 01:11:55,008 --> 01:11:59,104 Although I know you want to. We both know you want to. 757 01:11:59,279 --> 01:12:04,012 Then you could have me any time you want. And I do mean any time. 758 01:12:04,818 --> 01:12:08,811 Get me my cigarettes, would you, lover? They're in my purse. 759 01:12:12,626 --> 01:12:14,423 I'm just so... 760 01:12:19,232 --> 01:12:21,223 That's a pretty big gun. 761 01:12:23,470 --> 01:12:27,099 Darling, all this talk about killing 762 01:12:27,274 --> 01:12:30,732 and.45 magnums with the clip filed down and the safety off. 763 01:12:30,911 --> 01:12:33,607 It's just all so confusing... 764 01:12:33,780 --> 01:12:37,216 I won't. I won't. I won't... 765 01:12:38,819 --> 01:12:42,949 - I won't let you. - He is a dead man. 766 01:12:52,033 --> 01:12:53,523 No way. 767 01:12:56,604 --> 01:13:00,700 You know what? I got myself into this, I'll get myself out of it. 768 01:13:00,875 --> 01:13:03,571 I'll take it on the chin and be a man. 769 01:13:03,744 --> 01:13:08,772 Keep the faith. If you book them, they will come. 770 01:13:11,152 --> 01:13:16,385 OK. All right, man. You got to stop doing that, all right? Oh, man. 771 01:13:16,557 --> 01:13:22,154 - Hello, is anybody here? Hello. - Oh, my God! Rip Taylor! 772 01:13:23,064 --> 01:13:25,555 - You must be Wayne Campbell. - Yes, I am. 773 01:13:25,733 --> 01:13:27,428 - How are you? - Very good. 774 01:13:27,602 --> 01:13:30,435 - This must be Waynestock. - Yes, it is. 775 01:13:30,605 --> 01:13:34,939 - It's rustic and bucolic, but cute. - Thanks. 776 01:13:35,109 --> 01:13:38,943 How are you, pal? Better get ready for the show. Get dressed. 777 01:13:39,113 --> 01:13:42,048 - You can see him? - Of course I can. 778 01:13:42,216 --> 01:13:45,515 How are you gonna to miss a half-naked Indian? 779 01:13:46,487 --> 01:13:50,116 - Rip Taylor, Garth Algar. - Rip, you showed up. Cool. 780 01:13:50,291 --> 01:13:53,193 My people got a call from you. Thank you. 781 01:13:53,362 --> 01:13:56,923 Before I could say no, this guy came to me in a dream. 782 01:13:57,099 --> 01:14:01,627 I said, "Who are you?" He said, "Jim Morrison. I'm a dead rock star." 783 01:14:01,803 --> 01:14:05,432 I said, "I'm not familiar with your work." So he played The Doors. 784 01:14:05,607 --> 01:14:10,010 I said, "You're like a crooner in the rock milieu, which I like." 785 01:14:10,178 --> 01:14:15,047 - Why is our order taking so long? - He said, "You gotta do Waynestock." 786 01:14:15,217 --> 01:14:17,447 I figured, what the hey? 787 01:14:19,221 --> 01:14:21,951 - What's going on? - Don't you know? 788 01:14:22,124 --> 01:14:26,220 - We're here for Waynestock. - Same here. Looking forward to it. 789 01:14:27,829 --> 01:14:30,354 - Where did they come from? - This is big. 790 01:14:30,532 --> 01:14:32,523 We got to get back to the fields. 791 01:14:43,345 --> 01:14:47,839 Have you seen Cassandra? I know. It's weird. 792 01:14:48,016 --> 01:14:50,541 I don't know where she is, either. 793 01:14:50,719 --> 01:14:54,280 I know. She said she'd play, and she never misses a gig. 794 01:14:54,457 --> 01:14:57,290 If you see her, send her over to Waynestock. 795 01:14:57,460 --> 01:15:00,258 Thanks a lot, Chief. All right, bye-bye. 796 01:15:00,430 --> 01:15:05,424 Wayne! Wayne! Here's what's happening so far. 797 01:15:05,602 --> 01:15:09,333 People have started to show up, but none of the bands are here. 798 01:15:10,206 --> 01:15:14,108 Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to hurl. 799 01:15:14,277 --> 01:15:19,237 Garth, ix-nay on the url-hay. Think! Where could Cassandra be? 800 01:15:23,553 --> 01:15:27,182 I think I had too much Jolt cola. 801 01:15:31,394 --> 01:15:32,588 Jeff, Wayne. 802 01:15:32,762 --> 01:15:34,627 I cannot find your daughter and I'm troubled. 803 01:15:34,797 --> 01:15:38,893 Alas, my friend, I've chosen another for my daughter. 804 01:15:39,068 --> 01:15:42,936 You are an excellent warrior, but I require more in a son-in-law. 805 01:15:43,106 --> 01:15:44,437 He has money. 806 01:15:44,607 --> 01:15:47,576 Name the one you have chosen! He will die by my hand. 807 01:15:47,744 --> 01:15:49,609 His name is Bobby. 808 01:15:49,779 --> 01:15:53,215 He has offered security, a career and a green card. 809 01:15:53,383 --> 01:15:54,873 I arranged the match. 810 01:15:55,051 --> 01:15:58,579 Though I am sure this will be useless to you so late in the film, 811 01:15:58,756 --> 01:16:02,283 they'll be married at the First Presbyterian Church. 812 01:16:02,459 --> 01:16:05,656 Sorry I could not invite you to the wedding. 813 01:16:07,464 --> 01:16:10,024 It's OK. She's marrying Bobby. 814 01:16:13,837 --> 01:16:15,532 What are you doing? 815 01:16:15,706 --> 01:16:19,540 I'm out! I have to find Cassandra and tell her how I feel. 816 01:16:19,710 --> 01:16:22,873 But I can't do the concert alone. It takes two. 817 01:16:23,047 --> 01:16:27,541 You're right. I'm in. But I love her! I'm freaking out! 818 01:16:27,718 --> 01:16:29,242 What am I gonna do? 819 01:16:29,420 --> 01:16:32,583 Go get Cassandra. Del and I will run the concert. 820 01:16:35,059 --> 01:16:39,587 Just get Cassandra and be back before we start. Go, now! 821 01:16:49,306 --> 01:16:52,935 Now move it, people! Go! Go! Go! 822 01:16:53,911 --> 01:16:57,677 - Hi! - I'm kind of busy now. 823 01:16:59,084 --> 01:17:03,248 I just wanted to know if you needed anything from the permit office. 824 01:17:08,093 --> 01:17:10,459 That's a Unix book. 825 01:17:11,596 --> 01:17:14,360 - Yeah. - Cool. 826 01:17:33,818 --> 01:17:36,981 All right, men. Our work here is done. 827 01:17:39,924 --> 01:17:41,721 Excellent. 828 01:18:28,774 --> 01:18:33,404 Where's the First Presbyterian Church on Gordon Street? 829 01:18:33,579 --> 01:18:36,207 - Gordon Street! - Oh, yeah. 830 01:18:36,382 --> 01:18:40,819 I once knew a girl who lived on Gordon Street, 831 01:18:40,986 --> 01:18:44,945 but that was a long time ago, when I was young. 832 01:18:45,124 --> 01:18:49,584 Do we have to put up with this? Can't we get a better actor? 833 01:18:49,762 --> 01:18:53,459 I know it's a small part, but we can do better than this. 834 01:18:59,138 --> 01:19:03,667 Gordon Street? Oh, yes, Gordon Street. 835 01:19:04,578 --> 01:19:06,978 I once knew a girl who lived on Gordon Street. 836 01:19:07,147 --> 01:19:10,548 Long time ago, when I was a young man. 837 01:19:11,585 --> 01:19:14,884 Not a day passes that I don't think of her, 838 01:19:15,055 --> 01:19:20,322 and the promise I made, which I will always keep. 839 01:19:20,493 --> 01:19:23,360 That one perfect day on Gordon Street. 840 01:19:24,731 --> 01:19:27,529 That's, five blocks up, two over. 841 01:19:29,870 --> 01:19:31,462 Thank you. 842 01:19:58,932 --> 01:20:03,801 - Welcome to Aurora! - Eat me! 843 01:20:05,805 --> 01:20:09,708 Not just a place, but a state of mind. 844 01:20:57,625 --> 01:21:00,423 Oh, Jesus. God, no. 845 01:21:09,972 --> 01:21:11,701 Hi. Sorry! 846 01:21:11,873 --> 01:21:14,899 Sorry, everybody! Wrong wedding! 847 01:21:16,211 --> 01:21:17,644 Who's he? 848 01:21:41,169 --> 01:21:44,002 Oh, Jesus. God, no. 849 01:21:50,712 --> 01:21:52,771 What an asshole! 850 01:22:09,998 --> 01:22:11,330 Son of a bitch! 851 01:22:12,869 --> 01:22:16,703 - Son of a bitch! - Son of a bitch! 852 01:22:32,355 --> 01:22:34,619 You punk. You crazy punk. 853 01:23:12,963 --> 01:23:14,225 Stevenson Park! Step on it! 854 01:23:15,799 --> 01:23:23,035 - One, one, two, two, two. - Check two! Check two! 855 01:23:23,774 --> 01:23:29,371 OK. We have some word that there is some bad red rope liquorice 856 01:23:29,546 --> 01:23:32,014 circulating in the crowd. 857 01:23:32,182 --> 01:23:36,551 Repeat, stay away from the red rope liquorice. 858 01:23:36,720 --> 01:23:44,024 Do not bite any off and chew it. It could cause a dental emergency. 859 01:23:51,034 --> 01:23:53,059 Excuse me. Excuse me. 860 01:24:03,313 --> 01:24:06,612 - Guys, huh? - Wayne, Cassandra, you made it! 861 01:24:08,051 --> 01:24:09,609 This is great! 862 01:24:13,190 --> 01:24:15,489 What'll we do? The bands haven't showed. 863 01:24:15,660 --> 01:24:19,460 Jim Morrison said, "If you book them, they will come." 864 01:24:19,631 --> 01:24:21,656 It doesn't look too good. 865 01:24:24,369 --> 01:24:27,827 Jim? Jim! 866 01:24:34,679 --> 01:24:39,378 - We really are in the desert. - Yeah, no guff! 867 01:24:43,254 --> 01:24:46,246 - Jim Morrison. - Told you so, man. 868 01:24:46,424 --> 01:24:50,588 - How can I help you? - None of the bands have shown up. 869 01:24:50,762 --> 01:24:52,855 I know, and they're not gonna show up. 870 01:24:53,631 --> 01:24:55,997 Then why were we supposed to put on a concert? 871 01:24:56,167 --> 01:24:59,500 Because you had to try and do something with your life. 872 01:24:59,671 --> 01:25:01,468 But it was a failure. 873 01:25:02,207 --> 01:25:03,504 Whether you won or lost, 874 01:25:03,675 --> 01:25:06,940 what's important is that you gave it your best shot. 875 01:25:07,111 --> 01:25:08,510 Sorry, man. 876 01:25:08,680 --> 01:25:10,648 - OK. - All right. 877 01:25:10,815 --> 01:25:14,649 You'll think of something. It's your movie. 878 01:25:15,553 --> 01:25:18,546 Thanks a pantload, Chet. 879 01:25:19,191 --> 01:25:24,629 Wayne, where are we? How do we get back? 880 01:25:45,684 --> 01:25:48,016 We don't want to end the movie this way, do we? 881 01:25:48,187 --> 01:25:53,853 Good call. If we're gonna go down, let's at least go down in glory. 882 01:25:54,026 --> 01:25:56,859 Let's do the Thelma and louise ending. Yeah! 883 01:26:10,776 --> 01:26:15,873 - Let's just keep going, Wayne. - OK, Garth. 884 01:26:32,432 --> 01:26:35,299 We don't want to end the movie like this. 885 01:26:35,468 --> 01:26:39,029 Yeah. Let's do the happy ending. 886 01:26:45,145 --> 01:26:47,511 The bands haven't shown up. What'll we do? 887 01:26:47,681 --> 01:26:50,047 What are we going to do, you guys? 888 01:27:08,768 --> 01:27:12,067 - You made it. Excellent! - Welcome to Waynestock. 889 01:27:15,108 --> 01:27:16,735 All right. 890 01:27:56,784 --> 01:28:00,151 Jim, why was I supposed to put on this concert? 891 01:28:01,422 --> 01:28:04,755 Because you had to learn that it doesn't matter what you do, 892 01:28:04,925 --> 01:28:07,689 Cassandra loves you for who you are. 893 01:28:07,862 --> 01:28:12,595 And that being an adult means facing responsibility, 894 01:28:12,767 --> 01:28:15,827 yet still taking the time to have fun. 895 01:28:16,003 --> 01:28:19,495 Right. It's sort of like coming home on Friday night 896 01:28:19,673 --> 01:28:21,573 and doing your homework right away, 897 01:28:21,742 --> 01:28:25,304 so your Saturday night is free to just party. 898 01:28:25,480 --> 01:28:28,005 No, I like the way I said it better. 899 01:28:40,896 --> 01:28:43,091 Excuse me. 900 01:28:43,265 --> 01:28:46,564 Would you open the gate, please? I have to get in there. 901 01:28:46,735 --> 01:28:49,761 - You can't come in. - My girlfriend's in there. 902 01:28:49,938 --> 01:28:52,270 A lot of people's girlfriends are in there. 903 01:31:44,048 --> 01:31:48,348 - Don't cry. - Yeah, we're gonna clean it up. OK? 904 01:32:02,600 --> 01:32:06,195 - See? - See?