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Greece.
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People come here from all over
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00:01:02,228 --> 00:01:04,196
to see the ancient ruins.
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To bask in history.
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To be a part of the birthplace
of civilization.
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People reconnect with their souls.
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They find their mojo.
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In Greece, it's called kefi,
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which means "passion, joy, spirit."
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Late!
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Goodbye, Genaki.
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In a week.
That window's stuck again.
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- Bravo. Where is the rent?
- I left it on the trapesi.
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Now, me, I love the beauty
and architecture of ancient Greece.
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But living in modern Greece
can be a bit frustrating.
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Sometimes things go fast.
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Most times,
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not so much.
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I came here a year ago to teach
at Athens University.
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Cutbacks left me without a job.
So now, for now,
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I work at Pangloss Tours.
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Georgia!
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Oh, yeah. I've hit rock bottom.
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Georgia. Again you cut out beach day.
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They can go to the beach in any country.
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On my tour,
I teach them about ancient architecture.
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Nobody comes to Greece to learn.
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Maria, I disagree.
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- It's open.
- You didn't get the job.
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Don't you read the evaluations?
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"What do you think of Georgia
as tour director?"
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"Average. Average. Average."
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So I'm average.
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Average is the lowest box you can check.
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00:03:18,965 --> 00:03:20,956
Do you think we have
something that says, "Stinks"?
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And if we did, you'd be stinks.
37
00:03:23,503 --> 00:03:26,904
- "I find your tour boring."
- My tourists are boring.
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I think I've guided, like, 34 tours
39
00:03:29,075 --> 00:03:32,067
and you give me the same tourists
over and over again.
40
00:03:32,178 --> 00:03:35,807
Look! There they are.
The Tipsy Australians.
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- The Obnoxious Americans.
- It's called "rip-off."
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The Miserable Marriages.
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The Disgusted-With-Men-
But-Still-Looking Divorcees.
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- Stop!
- And, of course, The Old People.
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00:03:52,398 --> 00:03:54,559
- I don't see Mr. Funny.
- Who?
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00:03:55,101 --> 00:03:59,333
There's always one annoying guy
who thinks he's the life of the party.
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Canadians. Polite Canadians.
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00:04:04,344 --> 00:04:05,641
- Can I have them?
- No.
49
00:04:05,745 --> 00:04:07,804
They're in Group A. Nico's group.
50
00:04:07,914 --> 00:04:10,474
Why does Nico
always get the good group?
51
00:04:10,583 --> 00:04:13,074
His evaluations don't say, "Average."
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God!
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By the way,
Spiros eloped with that girl with no foot.
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- Excellent.
- Why?
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- I'm being sarcastic.
- You're not funny. Stop trying.
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00:04:27,100 --> 00:04:30,536
- Who's my driver? Not Themio.
- Relax. He's in jail.
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00:04:30,803 --> 00:04:33,135
You got the substitute. Procopi.
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00:04:33,506 --> 00:04:35,736
The creepy, hairy, creepy guy?
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00:04:36,542 --> 00:04:38,772
He's right behind me, isn't he?
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- Does he speak English?
- I don't know if he speaks anything.
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Maybe they caught a bear.
Taught it to drive.
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00:04:50,490 --> 00:04:52,856
So I have rules. You cannot speed,
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you cannot smoke
and you cannot eat while driving.
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Great, he doesn't speak English.
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Don't forget to brush him.
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00:05:05,972 --> 00:05:09,965
- Maria! Maria!
- Nico! Nico!
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00:05:12,845 --> 00:05:15,507
Hey, thank you for my group, eh? Whoa!
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He bribes you for the good group?
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00:05:18,518 --> 00:05:19,746
- No.
- Yes.
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Oh.
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That girl. That girl has no kefi.
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What Greek does not have spirit, eh?
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Maybe she's half Greek.
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This was supposed to be temporary while
she looked for some big-shot teaching job.
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And now no one will hire her
and I am stuck with her.
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Hey, if I make her quit, can I have a raise?
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I don't want to know about it. Yes.
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- Group B! Group B, everyone.
- Hey!
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00:06:04,831 --> 00:06:08,790
Group B, hello, I'm Georgia.
Welcome to Greece. I'm your tour guide.
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00:06:08,901 --> 00:06:11,028
I'm Irv Giddeon,
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00:06:11,137 --> 00:06:14,129
and I've come here to see
as many ancient ruins as possible.
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And judging from your husband,
the trip is already a success.
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There you are! And, indeed, funny.
84
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I'm killing me.
85
00:06:27,387 --> 00:06:29,855
How many of you, like me, have come here
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to fondle as many nude statues
as possible?
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00:06:33,025 --> 00:06:35,721
- Half the reason I came.
- Get your hand down.
88
00:06:35,828 --> 00:06:40,162
Jeez. This is comedy.
The Greeks invented it.
89
00:06:40,867 --> 00:06:43,131
It's like mustaches on women.
90
00:06:44,837 --> 00:06:49,672
You know, we left Adelaide last night
with 17 pounds of frozen flake.
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00:06:49,776 --> 00:06:51,607
Thirty hours later, she's right on the bugle.
92
00:06:51,711 --> 00:06:54,043
I'm giving it liquid yawns in the dunnies.
93
00:06:54,147 --> 00:06:55,671
- It was a shocker, Barry.
- Yeah.
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00:06:55,782 --> 00:06:58,876
- Are they speaking words?
- Australians are the nicest people,
95
00:06:58,985 --> 00:07:01,249
but you can only understand
about half of what they say.
96
00:07:01,354 --> 00:07:04,152
...a bad case of the trots
of last night's tucker.
97
00:07:04,257 --> 00:07:06,452
It's the last time I ate fish.
98
00:07:08,361 --> 00:07:11,728
Excuse me. Is this Pangloss Tours?
99
00:07:12,565 --> 00:07:13,862
Group B?
100
00:07:14,267 --> 00:07:18,033
Sweet marble cake, she speaks American.
Come on, get it up now.
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Okay. Ha-ha!
102
00:07:20,473 --> 00:07:23,135
- Okay, everybody, let's get on the bus.
- Oh, yes.
103
00:07:23,242 --> 00:07:25,870
Okay, Group B, got your tickets?
Follow me.
104
00:07:35,621 --> 00:07:36,849
Spooky.
105
00:07:38,124 --> 00:07:43,084
Okay. Now make sure that your luggage
is tagged and the driver will stow it.
106
00:07:43,763 --> 00:07:45,788
- Okay, you got me.
- Sorry.
107
00:07:45,898 --> 00:07:50,028
- That's okay. Dr. Tullen?
- Oh, no, no. I'm Mr., that's...
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I am Dr. Tullen.
And this is our daughter, Caitlin.
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00:07:53,673 --> 00:07:55,334
- Do smile, darling.
- I am.
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00:07:55,441 --> 00:07:58,740
Hey, big fellow, how many bells
have you got on the old dickory?
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00:07:58,845 --> 00:08:00,836
What the hell? What the hell is he saying?
112
00:08:00,947 --> 00:08:04,314
Oh, wake up, Australia.
He wants to know what time it is.
113
00:08:04,417 --> 00:08:05,714
- See, if it's...
- Here you go.
114
00:08:05,818 --> 00:08:09,049
...10 hours ahead here,
then that would make it...
115
00:08:09,322 --> 00:08:11,483
Kimmy, what time is it back in the States?
116
00:08:11,591 --> 00:08:14,287
- The right time.
- Good one, Kimmy.
117
00:08:14,527 --> 00:08:17,496
Kim and Al Sawchuck. S-A-W-Chuck.
118
00:08:17,597 --> 00:08:19,258
- Come on, Al. Come on, Big Al.
- AI Sawchuck. How are you?
119
00:08:19,365 --> 00:08:20,457
- Okay. How are you?
- Let's go, Big Al.
120
00:08:20,566 --> 00:08:24,127
Okay, there you go. There you go.
121
00:08:25,872 --> 00:08:28,102
There's no smoking on the bus.
122
00:08:33,312 --> 00:08:35,371
- I have a question.
- Yeah.
123
00:08:35,948 --> 00:08:37,939
What's with the beekeeper?
124
00:08:38,417 --> 00:08:41,011
My wife needs protection from the sun.
125
00:08:41,120 --> 00:08:43,281
But we're not going to the sun.
126
00:08:44,590 --> 00:08:47,855
That man is so rude. Make it stop.
127
00:08:54,066 --> 00:08:56,591
Excuse me, ladies. Hey, there.
128
00:08:56,936 --> 00:08:58,927
I'm Marc Mallard. IHOP.
129
00:08:59,038 --> 00:09:01,905
That's the International House
of Pancakes.
130
00:09:02,675 --> 00:09:04,506
Did one of you lose this?
131
00:09:05,044 --> 00:09:08,309
Thank you, Marc. I must have dropped it.
132
00:09:09,949 --> 00:09:12,179
It looks like a raspberry waffle.
133
00:09:12,285 --> 00:09:15,812
- Or a tart.
- Or a tart.
134
00:09:16,188 --> 00:09:21,319
Hi. I'm Lena Mar�a Angustias
Teresa Fern�ndez de la Vega Rodr�guez.
135
00:09:21,427 --> 00:09:22,792
And she's Lala Cruz.
136
00:09:22,895 --> 00:09:24,760
- We're from Espa�a.
- Really?
137
00:09:24,864 --> 00:09:25,990
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
138
00:09:26,098 --> 00:09:29,659
- And we are both recently divorced.
- And off men.
139
00:09:30,503 --> 00:09:31,470
Hmm.
140
00:09:32,605 --> 00:09:34,835
Hi. I'm Marc Mallard. IHOP.
141
00:09:34,941 --> 00:09:37,933
Hello. Georgia Yanokoupolis.
Pangloss Tours.
142
00:09:39,078 --> 00:09:41,410
- I'll see you on the bus.
- Okay.
143
00:09:43,316 --> 00:09:45,648
Group B? Yes. Names.
144
00:09:47,587 --> 00:09:49,987
You don't speak English, do you?
145
00:09:50,690 --> 00:09:52,681
And Maria gave you to me.
146
00:09:54,961 --> 00:09:57,725
Luggage this way.
And then you get on the bus.
147
00:09:57,830 --> 00:10:00,663
- Excuse me. I'm looking for the bus.
- Yeah.
148
00:10:01,701 --> 00:10:03,896
- This is it.
- Group B?
149
00:10:05,338 --> 00:10:07,169
- Oh, cool.
- Okay.
150
00:10:07,506 --> 00:10:09,701
Hey, Gator Phillips.
151
00:10:09,809 --> 00:10:14,473
- I'm from Florida, the States.
- You're traveling alone?
152
00:10:14,947 --> 00:10:18,508
No way, man.
I'm gonna meet my girlfriend in Greece.
153
00:10:19,018 --> 00:10:21,043
- We are in Greece.
- Now?
154
00:10:23,222 --> 00:10:26,191
Right on. Thanks, man.
155
00:10:26,659 --> 00:10:29,025
- Okay, here you go.
- Is this free?
156
00:10:29,128 --> 00:10:30,254
- Yeah.
- Whoa!
157
00:10:35,501 --> 00:10:38,231
Kalimera, everyone.
That's Greek for, "Good morning."
158
00:10:38,337 --> 00:10:41,898
Hello, beautiful people. I am Nico.
159
00:10:42,008 --> 00:10:44,909
For you, warm loucoumades.
160
00:10:45,344 --> 00:10:48,336
Oh, I'm so sorry. Wrong bus.
161
00:10:50,082 --> 00:10:52,414
- Hey, wait a minute...
- What the hell? Where's our donuts?
162
00:10:52,518 --> 00:10:53,507
What a rip!
163
00:10:53,619 --> 00:10:57,487
I'm gonna get... I could get you some later,
maybe. I'll look around.
164
00:10:57,590 --> 00:10:58,557
- Yeah...
- We should get something.
165
00:10:59,725 --> 00:11:00,692
Let's go.
166
00:11:01,594 --> 00:11:03,858
I mean, who needs the carbs, right?
167
00:11:03,963 --> 00:11:06,727
Not me. My ankles swell from the wheat.
168
00:11:08,701 --> 00:11:12,432
Okay, you might want to write this down.
169
00:11:13,439 --> 00:11:17,808
In 1834, Athens became
the capital of modern Greece.
170
00:11:18,444 --> 00:11:22,403
Now, I'm not just a tour guide.
I am a professor of classical history.
171
00:11:22,515 --> 00:11:24,107
Oh, great!
Are we gonna have a test now?
172
00:11:24,216 --> 00:11:27,014
So I'm going to teach you
all about the architecture
173
00:11:27,119 --> 00:11:29,110
and monuments of ancient Greece.
174
00:11:29,221 --> 00:11:32,156
- Like the propylea.
- Which is the word for donuts.
175
00:11:36,262 --> 00:11:38,753
- My name is Georgia.
- Louder, please.
176
00:11:38,864 --> 00:11:41,162
- My name is Georgia.
- Yes, dear.
177
00:11:41,534 --> 00:11:43,832
I'm Dorcas, Dorcas Wilmore.
178
00:11:44,370 --> 00:11:46,770
And this is my husband, Barnaby.
179
00:11:47,139 --> 00:11:50,597
Oh, I've got everyone a little souvenir.
180
00:11:51,010 --> 00:11:53,604
- To remember our trip together.
- All right.
181
00:11:53,713 --> 00:11:56,841
- Oh, you shouldn't have.
- This must have cost you a shload.
182
00:11:56,949 --> 00:11:58,883
Oh, no, it was nothing.
183
00:11:59,151 --> 00:12:01,915
Hand those around, would you, dear?
184
00:12:03,189 --> 00:12:06,158
Guide, this bus is really stuffy.
185
00:12:06,258 --> 00:12:09,819
- My daughter, Caitlin, needs fresh air.
- Okay, no problem.
186
00:12:15,134 --> 00:12:16,101
Uh-oh.
187
00:12:20,406 --> 00:12:22,431
- Turn it off!
- Oh, my God!
188
00:12:26,645 --> 00:12:28,374
Smells like death.
189
00:12:31,250 --> 00:12:32,877
Sorry about that.
190
00:12:32,985 --> 00:12:34,885
- Angie?
- It's Georgia.
191
00:12:34,987 --> 00:12:38,286
Is the Sasquatch gonna be
with us the whole time?
192
00:12:38,991 --> 00:12:41,425
- He's the driver.
- What's his name?
193
00:12:41,594 --> 00:12:44,893
Right. Everyone,
please say hello to Procopi.
194
00:12:44,997 --> 00:12:47,363
- Hey, Procopi.
- Hello, Procopi.
195
00:12:49,702 --> 00:12:53,160
Oh, I'm sorry. He has a nickname
he'd rather be known by.
196
00:12:53,272 --> 00:12:54,398
Poupi.
197
00:12:55,474 --> 00:12:56,600
Did he just say, "Poop"?
198
00:12:56,709 --> 00:12:59,405
Fair suck of the sav,
mate, I can't call you Poupi.
199
00:12:59,512 --> 00:13:00,536
What's your last name?
200
00:13:09,255 --> 00:13:10,620
It's Kakas.
201
00:13:20,633 --> 00:13:22,567
They're laughing at your name.
202
00:13:22,868 --> 00:13:24,733
So what? Laughing is good.
203
00:13:44,890 --> 00:13:47,518
- Okay! Yeah.
- It's hot.
204
00:13:48,794 --> 00:13:51,456
Come, come, come.
I love you beautiful people.
205
00:13:51,564 --> 00:13:54,089
All right, everybody,
let's go this way. Come on.
206
00:13:54,200 --> 00:13:58,136
Well, I have an exciting day planned.
But, first, listen.
207
00:13:58,237 --> 00:14:02,765
Whenever we stop the bus, whether it be
for restrooms or lunch or for touring,
208
00:14:02,875 --> 00:14:06,242
the driver or I will lock the bus. So you
can leave whatever you need in there.
209
00:14:06,345 --> 00:14:09,075
Cameras, sweaters, handbags, anything.
210
00:14:09,181 --> 00:14:11,547
- What about sweaters?
- Anything.
211
00:14:11,650 --> 00:14:13,174
- Handbags?
- Yes.
212
00:14:13,285 --> 00:14:14,752
Cameras, too?
213
00:14:15,154 --> 00:14:18,646
Cameras, too.
Anything, anytime, anywhere.
214
00:14:19,625 --> 00:14:23,061
- Anything.
- Come on, Barnaby. Come on.
215
00:14:23,162 --> 00:14:27,292
We are now walking through
the tholos. Say it with me? Anyone?
216
00:14:27,399 --> 00:14:30,334
Okay. The Greek word "agora"
means a place of gathering,
217
00:14:30,436 --> 00:14:33,303
and in ancient times,
this was the heart of Athenian life.
218
00:14:33,405 --> 00:14:35,669
Plato and Socrates taught philosophy here.
219
00:14:35,774 --> 00:14:37,366
- She still talking?
- It's hot.
220
00:14:37,476 --> 00:14:38,602
- Yes.
- Where can we get ice cream?
221
00:14:38,711 --> 00:14:40,474
- Is there, like, a mini-mart around here?
- lf you just...
222
00:14:40,579 --> 00:14:42,843
I thought this was
the ancient supermarket.
223
00:14:42,948 --> 00:14:44,540
- lf you go back to...
- Come, come.
224
00:14:44,650 --> 00:14:47,414
I have a surprise for you. Look. Hey!
225
00:14:47,720 --> 00:14:50,689
Come, beautiful people. Who wants to be
Zeus and Athena? Please, please, come.
226
00:14:50,789 --> 00:14:52,222
- Photo op here.
- Look, he's great.
227
00:14:52,324 --> 00:14:53,723
- Come on.
- Hey, can we do that?
228
00:14:53,826 --> 00:14:56,192
- I wish I was over there.
- That's cheesy.
229
00:14:56,295 --> 00:14:57,819
- That's the good group.
- I want to take a listen.
230
00:14:57,930 --> 00:15:00,831
There's a god with a camera. He's a very
clever god. He invented the camera.
231
00:15:02,001 --> 00:15:05,129
All right, we're going to
the Temple of Hephaestus now. This way.
232
00:15:05,237 --> 00:15:09,071
It's an exciting chapter in history.
Come on, everyone.
233
00:15:09,174 --> 00:15:11,768
I'd rather get my picture taken
as Zeus over there.
234
00:15:11,877 --> 00:15:14,573
It's this way. Come on.
I know it's hot.
235
00:15:17,716 --> 00:15:19,775
The Temple of Hephaestus,
236
00:15:19,885 --> 00:15:22,080
- built between 460 and 415...
- In the words of Big Kev, love...
237
00:15:22,187 --> 00:15:24,246
- We're excited!
- We're excited!
238
00:15:24,356 --> 00:15:26,517
- I'm not sure if they allow beer here.
- Okay, I'll finish it off.
239
00:15:26,625 --> 00:15:28,889
- Okay. There's a trash can over there.
- At last some excitement.
240
00:15:28,994 --> 00:15:31,292
Built between 460 and 415 B. C...
241
00:15:31,397 --> 00:15:34,366
This place looks just like
our Washington, D.C. IHOP.
242
00:15:34,466 --> 00:15:37,196
- No, actually, I'm sure it doesn't.
- Hey, Ange, hey, Ange! Ange!
243
00:15:37,336 --> 00:15:40,362
Al and his crew could have
this place fixed up in a couple of minutes.
244
00:15:40,472 --> 00:15:43,100
Dry wall, new roof, walk-in closets.
245
00:15:43,542 --> 00:15:45,134
- Flip that house!
- Flip that house!
246
00:15:48,714 --> 00:15:50,477
That's a joke. I'm sure that's a joke,
247
00:15:50,582 --> 00:15:53,142
because making it new
would not make it more beautiful.
248
00:15:53,252 --> 00:15:55,914
The point is, it's ancient.
249
00:15:56,689 --> 00:15:59,522
It's ancient. I mean, look at it.
250
00:16:01,126 --> 00:16:02,889
Isn't it magnificent?
251
00:16:03,629 --> 00:16:08,032
Come this way, beautiful people.
Nico puts the gloss into Pangloss. Yes?
252
00:16:08,567 --> 00:16:10,501
Now come around. Please, come around.
Thank you.
253
00:16:10,602 --> 00:16:14,003
So come around, please.
That's the temple there.
254
00:16:14,106 --> 00:16:16,006
- It's very nice, yes?
- Yes.
255
00:16:16,108 --> 00:16:19,168
Enough culture. Now, souvenirs, yes?
256
00:16:19,278 --> 00:16:22,042
Who wants that temple made of soap?
257
00:16:23,148 --> 00:16:25,742
- Temple on a rope, yeah?
- Me, please.
258
00:16:26,285 --> 00:16:27,980
No, no, that's not authentic.
259
00:16:28,087 --> 00:16:29,418
- You don't want that.
- We like those.
260
00:16:29,521 --> 00:16:32,513
Hey, Group B.
You want to come shopping with Nico?
261
00:16:32,624 --> 00:16:34,285
Nico, what are you doing?
262
00:16:34,393 --> 00:16:35,883
No, Group B, you're with me.
263
00:16:35,995 --> 00:16:38,862
I've an hour of shopping
scheduled on Day 4.
264
00:16:40,165 --> 00:16:42,258
- This way, hon.
- We got everything, my friend.
265
00:16:42,368 --> 00:16:46,270
Come this way, follow the pretty ladies.
Hey, beautiful ladies!
266
00:16:46,372 --> 00:16:48,863
Meet back at the bus in 40 minutes.
267
00:16:52,011 --> 00:16:55,003
Standing in the middle
of culture and history,
268
00:16:55,614 --> 00:17:00,449
and they want a 50-50 poly-cotton blend
T-shirt with a picture of a Trojan horse.
269
00:17:10,195 --> 00:17:12,823
Why am I spending my life
showing tourists
270
00:17:12,931 --> 00:17:15,593
gorgeous ancient ruins
they care nothing about?
271
00:17:15,701 --> 00:17:20,035
And Pangloss Tours pays lousy.
They book the worst hotel rooms.
272
00:17:20,139 --> 00:17:23,540
I don't have any friends here.
I actually don't know anybody.
273
00:17:23,642 --> 00:17:26,202
Really, I haven't had sex in forever.
274
00:17:27,546 --> 00:17:29,776
- Forever is a long time.
- Yeah.
275
00:17:34,987 --> 00:17:37,114
- You speak English.
- Yes.
276
00:17:37,222 --> 00:17:38,712
I do, too.
277
00:17:40,092 --> 00:17:41,491
42 euros.
278
00:17:42,361 --> 00:17:44,852
That's great. Anybody else?
279
00:17:46,398 --> 00:17:51,267
Excellent. Excuse me. Nice to meet you.
Excuse me. Bye.
280
00:17:52,971 --> 00:17:55,633
- You must think I'm crazy.
- Yes.
281
00:17:56,608 --> 00:17:59,736
Fair enough. Why would you not tell me?
282
00:18:00,112 --> 00:18:04,310
I thought you needed to talk.
I have three sisters. So talk.
283
00:18:06,452 --> 00:18:08,818
Do you ever question
what you're doing with your life?
284
00:18:08,921 --> 00:18:10,821
- No.
- What?
285
00:18:11,190 --> 00:18:14,216
- Talk more about the no sex.
- I'm good, thanks.
286
00:18:14,827 --> 00:18:17,796
You don't question? Come on,
Greece is the land of philosophers.
287
00:18:17,896 --> 00:18:21,354
Yes. But that is their job.
My job is to drive the bus.
288
00:18:21,467 --> 00:18:23,230
You know, it pays better.
289
00:18:23,335 --> 00:18:25,530
Come on. You don't have a life plan?
290
00:18:25,637 --> 00:18:27,764
- How do you plan life?
- What?
291
00:18:29,641 --> 00:18:32,508
Come on.
We'll get some coffee and you can talk.
292
00:18:32,611 --> 00:18:34,238
What? We're working.
293
00:18:34,346 --> 00:18:36,337
Everyone should take the time for a coffee.
294
00:18:36,448 --> 00:18:39,645
That is the typical Greek mentality.
295
00:18:39,985 --> 00:18:42,647
Woman. Where's your kefi?
296
00:18:42,988 --> 00:18:45,081
- I have kefi. I have lots of kefi.
- No.
297
00:18:45,190 --> 00:18:47,249
- No, you don't. No.
- Yes, I do.
298
00:18:47,359 --> 00:18:50,089
That's why you're so uptight and skinny.
299
00:18:51,396 --> 00:18:52,556
Skinny?
300
00:18:55,267 --> 00:18:57,861
Look, we're late, so no coffee. Hey.
301
00:18:58,003 --> 00:19:00,995
Everybody in Nico's group
has nice vacation.
302
00:19:01,340 --> 00:19:02,568
You want to have relation with me?
303
00:19:03,375 --> 00:19:05,434
What's that postcard there?
304
00:19:05,544 --> 00:19:10,106
Which one? Which side
do you want? The one up above or this one?
305
00:19:10,883 --> 00:19:13,078
Oh, that's nice. Good.
306
00:19:16,288 --> 00:19:17,585
Group B!
307
00:19:19,091 --> 00:19:20,388
Group B!
308
00:19:21,026 --> 00:19:22,891
Gather up, Group B.
309
00:19:22,995 --> 00:19:26,260
Well, we're a little behind schedule.
A lot. So...
310
00:19:26,365 --> 00:19:28,629
I picked up something
that we can eat on the bus.
311
00:19:28,734 --> 00:19:30,998
And it is a special treat.
312
00:19:31,336 --> 00:19:33,167
- What is that?
- It's souvlaki.
313
00:19:33,272 --> 00:19:36,400
- It's meat on a stick.
- What kind of meat is that?
314
00:19:36,642 --> 00:19:38,041
It looks like poodle.
315
00:19:39,278 --> 00:19:41,212
- That's not right.
- It's not poodle.
316
00:19:41,313 --> 00:19:45,079
Hey. Hey, come to the Hard Rock Cafe.
It's very Greek.
317
00:19:45,184 --> 00:19:47,015
- Dude, Hard Rock!
- Come! Come on.
318
00:19:47,119 --> 00:19:49,246
Chicken fingers and French fries!
319
00:19:50,889 --> 00:19:52,083
No, no.
320
00:19:53,559 --> 00:19:55,894
I have souvlaki.
Why would you want to... That...
321
00:19:55,894 --> 00:19:56,383
I have souvlaki.
Why would you want to... That...
322
00:19:56,528 --> 00:19:58,621
Yeah. Get a Greek salad.
323
00:19:59,531 --> 00:20:02,364
Hard Rock.
Doesn't sound very Greek to me.
324
00:20:04,937 --> 00:20:09,704
- Hi, it's Caitlin, right? Having fun?
- No.
325
00:20:10,876 --> 00:20:13,709
- Well, what are you listening to?
- Nothing.
326
00:20:14,146 --> 00:20:17,912
- When are we going to the beach?
- That's not on my itinerary.
327
00:20:18,250 --> 00:20:20,241
Of course not. This sucks.
328
00:20:21,720 --> 00:20:23,415
Sorry about that.
329
00:20:23,522 --> 00:20:27,720
My daughter's chronically unhappy.
It's not her fault. It's a genetic thing.
330
00:20:27,859 --> 00:20:29,520
Hansdorf syndrome.
331
00:20:30,495 --> 00:20:32,554
Mr. Tullen, I'm so sorry.
332
00:20:43,208 --> 00:20:45,108
Okay, let's learn some
more Greek.
333
00:20:45,210 --> 00:20:49,169
Kalispera, kalispera, everyone.
That's Greek for, "Good evening."
334
00:20:50,649 --> 00:20:52,116
Can you say it with me?
335
00:20:55,754 --> 00:20:58,245
Wow. Are you sure you're not Greek?
336
00:21:27,853 --> 00:21:29,286
Hey, Georgia.
337
00:21:36,495 --> 00:21:40,226
I'm sorry. I got sunblock in my eye.
Do you have any drops?
338
00:21:40,565 --> 00:21:41,623
I do.
339
00:22:00,018 --> 00:22:04,546
This way, please. Beautiful people.
Ladies and gentlemen, this way, please.
340
00:22:04,656 --> 00:22:06,385
What is this place?
341
00:22:06,792 --> 00:22:09,090
Hey, hey, hey, Georgia, Georgia.
342
00:22:09,928 --> 00:22:12,396
- You're staying there?
- Aren't you?
343
00:22:12,698 --> 00:22:16,361
No way! Great hotel. Best chain in Greece.
344
00:22:17,569 --> 00:22:19,662
This way, please, Canadians.
345
00:22:20,806 --> 00:22:22,797
Everybody got your luggage?
346
00:22:22,908 --> 00:22:24,808
Wow. What a dump.
347
00:22:26,912 --> 00:22:30,541
Only about three at a time are
gonna fit in this elevator.
348
00:22:30,782 --> 00:22:34,343
Oh, Al, honey. We gotta get to the room.
I'm ovulating. Like, now.
349
00:22:34,453 --> 00:22:38,412
Kimmy, you know I can't perform
on command like that. That's not natural.
350
00:22:39,925 --> 00:22:41,256
Get into them. It's duck's guts.
351
00:22:41,360 --> 00:22:44,022
Crack open a tinny, love. After all
that yakking, you must be bloody thirsty.
352
00:22:44,696 --> 00:22:45,958
Actually, I'm a lightweight.
353
00:22:46,064 --> 00:22:49,625
One drink and I'm looking
for a bellman to make out with.
354
00:22:50,902 --> 00:22:53,530
- That was a joke.
- You're not funny.
355
00:22:54,106 --> 00:22:55,437
I've heard.
356
00:22:59,111 --> 00:23:01,944
Just a converter?
Yeah, that's no problem at all.
357
00:23:02,047 --> 00:23:04,242
Okay, I can get you water,
and do you need anything?
358
00:23:06,518 --> 00:23:07,644
Here we go. Okay.
359
00:23:07,753 --> 00:23:10,187
Come on, Barnaby. That's right. In you go.
360
00:23:10,288 --> 00:23:11,778
There you go.
361
00:23:43,588 --> 00:23:46,148
Your elevator is broken.
362
00:23:47,392 --> 00:23:48,882
Anthony Quinn.
363
00:23:58,904 --> 00:24:00,997
We have to take the stairs.
364
00:24:03,308 --> 00:24:05,742
- Why?
- Because it's Greece.
365
00:24:09,014 --> 00:24:11,744
In the movie Zorba the Greek, the scene
where Alan Bates and Anthony Quinn
366
00:24:11,850 --> 00:24:15,217
have just lost all their life savings.
What do they do? They dance.
367
00:24:17,322 --> 00:24:20,348
That's the way this whole country works.
Or doesn't.
368
00:24:20,459 --> 00:24:21,687
If the shower doesn't work...
369
00:24:22,928 --> 00:24:24,054
I'm sorry.
370
00:24:24,930 --> 00:24:25,988
...they dance.
371
00:24:26,097 --> 00:24:28,531
Or you want a little privacy,
372
00:24:31,703 --> 00:24:33,034
they dance.
373
00:24:33,472 --> 00:24:37,465
I'm very sorry. I'm very sorry.
Not that sorry.
374
00:24:38,009 --> 00:24:40,477
Or, God forbid, the toilet breaks...
375
00:24:42,814 --> 00:24:44,839
Oh, flapjacks.
376
00:24:44,950 --> 00:24:46,679
...you get the Greek philosophy.
377
00:24:46,785 --> 00:24:48,912
"Relax, pee outside.
378
00:24:49,020 --> 00:24:51,955
"Maybe it is your destiny
to write a poem about the sky."
379
00:24:52,824 --> 00:24:54,621
And then they dance.
380
00:24:56,228 --> 00:25:00,858
You know, Greece was
a happening place 2,500 years ago.
381
00:25:01,266 --> 00:25:04,201
It was the birthplace of art
and democracy and philosophy.
382
00:25:04,302 --> 00:25:06,668
And then they discovered the nap.
383
00:25:13,578 --> 00:25:17,344
This country's disregard for rules
and order is just sloppy.
384
00:25:20,952 --> 00:25:23,785
What is with this hair? Is it a full moon?
385
00:25:26,992 --> 00:25:32,555
You know, you've all just got to get
your act together and stop dancing.
386
00:25:35,800 --> 00:25:38,291
Where's my fleabag of a room?
387
00:25:45,143 --> 00:25:46,474
It's fixed.
388
00:25:54,486 --> 00:25:55,544
Yeah.
389
00:26:34,459 --> 00:26:35,687
Now what?
390
00:26:41,933 --> 00:26:44,367
- Maria!
- Georgia, darling.
391
00:26:44,469 --> 00:26:46,096
I'm up to my ears in work here.
392
00:26:46,204 --> 00:26:49,640
Greece has
the most beautiful accommodation.
393
00:26:51,076 --> 00:26:53,044
Like, first-class hotels with, like,
394
00:26:53,144 --> 00:26:54,975
your own swimming pool in your room.
395
00:26:55,080 --> 00:26:57,275
How do you find these crappy joints?
396
00:26:57,382 --> 00:26:58,974
Lucky I find somewhere.
397
00:26:59,084 --> 00:27:01,314
Yeah, you try finding a hotel
on the budget.
398
00:27:01,419 --> 00:27:02,613
Maria...
399
00:27:08,860 --> 00:27:10,487
Dear Maria,
400
00:27:11,963 --> 00:27:16,229
you are my only friend in Greece.
And you bite the big one.
401
00:27:17,469 --> 00:27:19,027
After this tour,
402
00:27:23,008 --> 00:27:24,202
I quit.
403
00:27:27,078 --> 00:27:28,545
Love, Georgia.
404
00:27:33,318 --> 00:27:36,253
Breakfast is on negative one,
down one floor.
405
00:27:36,554 --> 00:27:37,816
Oh, cool.
406
00:27:42,761 --> 00:27:45,662
Would you please mail this for me?
Certified.
407
00:27:46,765 --> 00:27:51,395
- I am on my coffee break.
- Of course. Look, I have to go.
408
00:28:09,154 --> 00:28:12,214
- 11 euros.
- What? That's like $20.
409
00:28:13,024 --> 00:28:17,757
You know, there are other ways to pay.
410
00:28:30,842 --> 00:28:32,571
Does that ever work?
411
00:28:33,745 --> 00:28:37,237
How many women have
actually slept with you for postage?
412
00:28:40,418 --> 00:28:41,476
Four.
413
00:28:42,387 --> 00:28:43,354
Oh.
414
00:28:44,289 --> 00:28:45,756
I'll just pay.
415
00:29:16,454 --> 00:29:19,787
So we have here a beautiful church.
It's very Greek.
416
00:29:20,125 --> 00:29:23,993
But you have ice creams, so we skip. Yes?
417
00:29:24,095 --> 00:29:25,653
- Yeah.
- Okay, souvenirs, yes?
418
00:29:25,764 --> 00:29:27,561
- Yeah!
- You like the vacation so far?
419
00:29:27,899 --> 00:29:30,299
rocks cut in the Byzantine era.
420
00:29:31,636 --> 00:29:34,730
There are references to this church
in a very old document
421
00:29:34,839 --> 00:29:37,239
called the Praktikon of Athens.
422
00:29:37,342 --> 00:29:39,742
Take a glance and look around
at some of the murals.
423
00:29:39,844 --> 00:29:44,406
The oldest parts of St. Marina's date back
to the 11th to 12th century B.C.
424
00:29:49,220 --> 00:29:52,815
Anybody else want a pamphlet?
Anybody? Want a pamphlet?
425
00:29:53,625 --> 00:29:55,525
Yes. Of course not.
426
00:29:55,627 --> 00:29:58,027
Kimmy, do you see what I see?
427
00:30:01,833 --> 00:30:05,360
That would be a great place for snacks
in the rec room.
428
00:30:07,272 --> 00:30:10,799
- Do you think it's for sale?
- Everything's got its price.
429
00:30:11,376 --> 00:30:13,469
Let's go find that preacher.
430
00:30:14,512 --> 00:30:16,377
I think they call him a rabbi here.
431
00:30:16,481 --> 00:30:18,915
We have to have photographs
so people will believe we were here.
432
00:30:19,017 --> 00:30:20,814
Who won't believe we were here?
433
00:30:20,919 --> 00:30:23,217
Well, Donald and Peggy for a start. What?
434
00:30:23,321 --> 00:30:25,585
Why don't you all get in there?
435
00:30:25,690 --> 00:30:27,248
Oh, that's very good of you.
Thank you very much.
436
00:30:27,358 --> 00:30:28,347
You're welcome.
437
00:30:28,459 --> 00:30:29,687
MR. TULLEN: He's going to take
our photograph.
438
00:30:29,794 --> 00:30:31,489
Okay, here we go.
439
00:30:33,031 --> 00:30:36,523
One, two, three.
440
00:30:37,468 --> 00:30:40,028
Four, five, six...
441
00:30:40,138 --> 00:30:41,469
Sorry, how high are you going?
442
00:30:41,573 --> 00:30:44,667
I'm going to keep counting
until the kid cracks a smile.
443
00:30:44,776 --> 00:30:48,143
Forgot where I left off. Gotta start again.
444
00:30:48,680 --> 00:30:49,874
One, two...
445
00:30:49,981 --> 00:30:52,347
Just take the picture, you idiot.
446
00:30:56,654 --> 00:30:58,417
There you go, kiddo.
447
00:31:01,092 --> 00:31:02,559
Oh, my God!
448
00:31:03,361 --> 00:31:04,623
DR. TULLEN: Georgia!
449
00:31:06,731 --> 00:31:09,256
Hey, Poupi, if anybody's looking...
When did you shave?
450
00:31:09,367 --> 00:31:13,269
- Never mind. I'm not here, okay? I'm just...
- Georgia. Georgia.
451
00:31:13,371 --> 00:31:15,635
I cannot put up with that twit any longer.
452
00:31:15,740 --> 00:31:18,504
- Why not? I have to.
- Now you're being rude.
453
00:31:18,610 --> 00:31:21,977
Yes, fine, I'm rude and boring
and not funny. Yes, I know!
454
00:31:22,080 --> 00:31:25,880
If you keep that tone with me,
I shall be forced to call your superiors.
455
00:31:25,984 --> 00:31:27,713
Okay, you know what?
456
00:31:27,819 --> 00:31:30,219
If you have a grievance, use these.
457
00:31:30,321 --> 00:31:33,347
- Your evaluation forms. Take one.
- Don't think I won't.
458
00:31:33,458 --> 00:31:35,517
I usually hand these out
at the end of the trip.
459
00:31:35,627 --> 00:31:38,152
But this will give you four more days
to complain about me.
460
00:31:38,263 --> 00:31:40,288
Hey, hand them out to everybody.
461
00:31:40,398 --> 00:31:42,423
What's Greek for "bipolar"?
462
00:31:44,836 --> 00:31:48,363
Hey. Enough. Your jokes aren't funny.
463
00:31:51,009 --> 00:31:54,775
You know, my wife and I have
taken tours for 20 years.
464
00:31:55,346 --> 00:31:58,076
This one, gotta be the worst.
465
00:31:58,182 --> 00:31:59,581
Here we go again. Yeah, yeah,
466
00:31:59,684 --> 00:32:03,211
- I know, yeah, I stink, I wrecked Greece.
- It's the worst because my wife is not here.
467
00:32:03,321 --> 00:32:05,687
- And it's just not the same.
- Well, you know what? If I were her,
468
00:32:05,823 --> 00:32:07,347
I wouldn't be here with you, either.
469
00:32:07,458 --> 00:32:10,621
I'm sure she's spending her vacation
somewhere...
470
00:32:22,407 --> 00:32:23,931
I'm so sorry.
471
00:32:44,395 --> 00:32:47,125
You know what?
I think we should just go shopping.
472
00:32:47,231 --> 00:32:50,758
- Lovely. Just what we wanted, wasn't it?
- Okay.
473
00:32:51,469 --> 00:32:53,801
Nice bit of shopping.
DR. TULLEN: I can finish this later.
474
00:32:54,238 --> 00:32:56,934
- I know a good place for shopping.
- Fine.
475
00:33:00,912 --> 00:33:02,641
Look at this stuff.
476
00:33:04,282 --> 00:33:05,874
No, no, no.
477
00:33:10,355 --> 00:33:11,322
Peekaboo!
478
00:33:15,760 --> 00:33:16,727
Do you like the gold?
479
00:33:17,528 --> 00:33:18,517
I love that.
480
00:33:18,629 --> 00:33:22,929
She doesn't have any arms so she makes
up for it by showing her breasts, honey.
481
00:33:23,034 --> 00:33:24,023
Really?
482
00:33:32,610 --> 00:33:34,441
Eat hearty, men.
483
00:33:34,545 --> 00:33:38,037
- For tonight we dine in Greece!
- In Greece!
484
00:33:45,223 --> 00:33:47,248
- What was his name?
- Who?
485
00:33:48,593 --> 00:33:50,458
When it's over,
some women cut their hair.
486
00:33:50,561 --> 00:33:52,529
Some women run away to Greece. So...
487
00:33:52,630 --> 00:33:55,758
I did not move to Greece
because of some man.
488
00:33:56,601 --> 00:33:59,069
- Why? Who'd you shave for?
- Georgia!
489
00:34:00,038 --> 00:34:01,164
Georgia, come here,
come here, come here!
490
00:34:01,272 --> 00:34:03,763
I don't think I like
what's going on around here.
491
00:34:06,177 --> 00:34:08,270
Georgia! We need you. Just, real...
We need you!
492
00:34:08,379 --> 00:34:10,745
- Okay.
- What did you call my wife?
493
00:34:11,516 --> 00:34:12,744
What's going on? What's going on?
494
00:34:12,850 --> 00:34:17,082
Look, this guy here is charging everybody
else one price for the dingle nut
495
00:34:17,188 --> 00:34:21,022
and he's charging me and my wife
two extra euros. That's what, fellow.
496
00:34:21,125 --> 00:34:22,615
It's just cultural interaction.
497
00:34:22,727 --> 00:34:26,219
He offers you a price and then
he expects you to offer him a price back.
498
00:34:26,330 --> 00:34:28,730
You know, it's just... It's called bargaining.
499
00:34:28,833 --> 00:34:31,666
- It's called "rip-off."
- Thank you very much.
500
00:34:34,105 --> 00:34:36,630
- What did he just call me?
- No, no, no. He wants me to translate.
501
00:34:37,809 --> 00:34:41,540
You fat tourists.
502
00:34:41,646 --> 00:34:43,307
My tourist friends.
503
00:34:43,414 --> 00:34:45,939
I could give you idiots
504
00:34:46,050 --> 00:34:48,484
authentic Greek items made
by my grandmother.
505
00:34:48,586 --> 00:34:52,784
He could give you handmade authentic
items made by his grandmother.
506
00:34:53,091 --> 00:34:56,458
But you dummies
want this cheap crap.
507
00:34:56,561 --> 00:34:58,028
You have good taste.
508
00:34:58,129 --> 00:35:00,063
This junk is made in Korea.
509
00:35:00,164 --> 00:35:01,392
Things are made in Corinth.
510
00:35:01,499 --> 00:35:02,989
By prisoners.
511
00:35:03,101 --> 00:35:04,534
By friends.
512
00:35:04,635 --> 00:35:05,829
For you, I'll double the price.
513
00:35:05,937 --> 00:35:07,165
I can make you a good price.
514
00:35:07,271 --> 00:35:09,967
Yeah, that's what we want
right there, fellow.
515
00:35:10,074 --> 00:35:12,508
And to your guide, a kickback.
516
00:35:12,610 --> 00:35:13,599
What?
517
00:35:13,711 --> 00:35:15,941
Kick back and enjoy your stay.
518
00:35:16,514 --> 00:35:17,742
- Okay?
- Okay.
519
00:35:17,849 --> 00:35:18,816
How much do you want for it?
520
00:35:18,916 --> 00:35:20,144
Twenty Euros.
521
00:35:20,251 --> 00:35:21,275
20 euros.
522
00:35:21,385 --> 00:35:23,910
- Is that good?
- Yeah, now that sounds more reasonable.
523
00:35:24,021 --> 00:35:25,181
- Okay.
- Okay.
524
00:35:25,289 --> 00:35:26,654
Okay. Okay.
525
00:35:34,432 --> 00:35:36,866
- Nobody touches Big Al's hottie.
- Thank you.
526
00:35:36,968 --> 00:35:38,868
- Dirty greaseball.
- Bye.
527
00:35:41,272 --> 00:35:43,035
How much are these?
528
00:35:43,141 --> 00:35:47,510
Oh, good heavens. They're far too
expensive. Can't possibly afford that.
529
00:35:54,285 --> 00:35:57,083
Oh, yeah, we're getting checked out, dude.
530
00:35:57,455 --> 00:36:00,015
- Really?
- Yeah, the Spanish divorcees.
531
00:36:00,925 --> 00:36:05,021
It's only a matter of time before
they start coming around. Hello.
532
00:36:06,230 --> 00:36:08,164
- Dude, behind you.
- What?
533
00:36:09,634 --> 00:36:12,728
They're checking out
the community shower thing.
534
00:36:14,205 --> 00:36:16,366
It's like Fourth of July
at Elton John's house.
535
00:36:16,474 --> 00:36:18,408
Okay. They want a show?
536
00:36:18,509 --> 00:36:21,945
Let's show the Spaniards
a little American showmanship.
537
00:36:42,967 --> 00:36:45,993
It doesn't count
if you're on vacation, right?
538
00:36:49,140 --> 00:36:51,836
What is it with tourists and ice cream?
539
00:36:51,943 --> 00:36:55,504
They had some this morning,
then again after lunch,
540
00:36:56,113 --> 00:36:59,708
and now again with the $4 cones.
I don't get it. You, too?
541
00:37:02,153 --> 00:37:05,054
- No, thank you.
- This for you to give to him.
542
00:37:13,130 --> 00:37:14,461
Okay, fine.
543
00:37:24,375 --> 00:37:26,240
I sort of got you this.
544
00:37:27,778 --> 00:37:29,609
Thanks, but no thanks.
545
00:37:36,020 --> 00:37:37,510
That is tasty.
546
00:37:53,671 --> 00:37:55,832
I'm sorry about this morning.
547
00:38:01,345 --> 00:38:04,872
You know, I was a much nicer guy
when my wife was alive.
548
00:38:06,584 --> 00:38:08,518
She died three years ago.
549
00:38:09,820 --> 00:38:13,847
She used to say to me,
"They don't know you're kidding, Irv."
550
00:38:16,093 --> 00:38:20,496
She would say, "You're not as funny
as you think you are," just like you.
551
00:38:22,266 --> 00:38:24,666
It's nice you had a good marriage.
552
00:38:25,102 --> 00:38:26,763
We fought every day.
553
00:38:27,705 --> 00:38:30,333
I took her to Egypt. We fought all day
554
00:38:30,775 --> 00:38:35,872
about whether the pyramids
were "majestic" or "magnificent."
555
00:38:38,783 --> 00:38:40,216
It was magic.
556
00:38:42,553 --> 00:38:44,350
Twenty-eight years.
557
00:38:45,423 --> 00:38:49,689
I woke up every day smiling.
558
00:38:51,095 --> 00:38:54,155
- I could live with that.
- You got the potential.
559
00:38:54,765 --> 00:38:58,929
All you gotta do is let it happen.
You know, relax. Open up.
560
00:39:00,137 --> 00:39:03,197
- I'm open.
- You're open? Look at you.
561
00:39:03,974 --> 00:39:07,034
You're as tight as my Aunt Gladys' ass.
562
00:39:08,012 --> 00:39:10,742
- Hey.
- Open up. Open.
563
00:39:12,883 --> 00:39:16,842
- Be alert. Be like...
- Like this. Like this?
564
00:39:18,122 --> 00:39:20,556
Okay. I'm open, yay!
565
00:39:21,759 --> 00:39:23,158
Oh, no, no!
566
00:39:24,128 --> 00:39:26,790
Come on, Irv, look what you made me do.
567
00:39:28,899 --> 00:39:32,232
- Okay, that's a keeper.
- Okay. So here's what we do.
568
00:39:32,336 --> 00:39:35,567
You get some kerosene.
You pour it on the stain.
569
00:39:35,673 --> 00:39:37,698
- Yeah.
- Keep it there for about an hour.
570
00:39:37,808 --> 00:39:38,797
Mmm-hmm.
571
00:39:38,909 --> 00:39:42,380
And then you light that sucker on fire
and buy something nice.
572
00:39:42,380 --> 00:39:43,278
And then you light that sucker on fire
and buy something nice.
573
00:39:43,948 --> 00:39:46,542
All right. I have to gather the group.
574
00:39:47,952 --> 00:39:50,443
- We're good?
- We're better.
575
00:39:52,289 --> 00:39:53,347
Okay.
576
00:39:56,193 --> 00:39:58,627
Group B! Group B, everybody.
577
00:39:59,130 --> 00:40:03,191
Everybody. I hope everyone enjoyed their
ice cream. I ate some. I'm wearing some.
578
00:40:03,300 --> 00:40:05,894
Let's get on the bus and sweat it off.
579
00:40:06,771 --> 00:40:09,205
Has anybody seen Dorcas? Anybody?
580
00:40:09,540 --> 00:40:11,735
All right. We'll wait for her.
581
00:40:25,456 --> 00:40:29,483
I'd like to apologize for
my unprofessional attitude this morning.
582
00:40:29,794 --> 00:40:34,026
Have you ever had one of those days?
Actually, it's been about a year.
583
00:40:34,331 --> 00:40:36,094
- Yes, Irv.
- Me, too.
584
00:40:36,634 --> 00:40:40,468
I would like to apologize to everybody.
It was my medication.
585
00:40:40,571 --> 00:40:43,301
I take Preparation H, 'cause I'm an asshole.
586
00:40:45,109 --> 00:40:47,737
Wait for me. Thank you, Georgie.
587
00:40:47,878 --> 00:40:52,076
I'm the last one. Okay, Poupi, let's go.
Ooh! I'm spent!
588
00:40:53,317 --> 00:40:55,376
I got these for you, girls.
589
00:40:56,187 --> 00:41:00,123
- It's too much.
- No. They cost nothing.
590
00:41:07,531 --> 00:41:09,260
Drive, Poupi, drive!
591
00:41:16,740 --> 00:41:19,800
Hey! Who's seen the Olympics on TV?
592
00:41:23,180 --> 00:41:26,911
Well, we're going to Olympia,
the site of the very first Olympics.
593
00:41:27,017 --> 00:41:29,679
The ancient games began in 776 B.C.
594
00:41:30,254 --> 00:41:32,154
Now, all through the era of the Pisatans...
595
00:41:32,256 --> 00:41:35,453
Flapjack, you want to race me
Michael Johnson style?
596
00:41:35,559 --> 00:41:37,959
...the Olympic games took place
every five years.
597
00:41:39,196 --> 00:41:40,527
Here's something interesting.
598
00:41:40,631 --> 00:41:44,362
Until they were abolished
from 393 until 426 A.D.
599
00:41:45,436 --> 00:41:47,199
And then in 1896...
600
00:41:49,006 --> 00:41:52,066
Well, that's about the year
I started to stink.
601
00:42:07,224 --> 00:42:10,523
I know every fact and every figure
about this place.
602
00:42:10,928 --> 00:42:14,056
I mean, I love it here.
And they just want to have fun.
603
00:42:14,164 --> 00:42:16,689
And I get it,
but I don't know how to make this job fun.
604
00:42:16,800 --> 00:42:19,564
Well, if you call it a job, it ain't fun.
605
00:42:20,104 --> 00:42:24,165
I mean, look at porn stars. They get to
schtup all day. They should be happy.
606
00:42:24,275 --> 00:42:26,937
You never hear about a happy porn star.
607
00:42:27,044 --> 00:42:30,138
I had the best job in the whole world.
608
00:42:32,316 --> 00:42:34,079
You were a porn star?
609
00:42:37,821 --> 00:42:40,915
- No, really, were you?
- I was an ice-cream taster.
610
00:42:41,025 --> 00:42:43,960
- Get out.
- Thirty-five years.
611
00:42:44,595 --> 00:42:48,292
- I wish I had that job.
- That's what my friends used to say.
612
00:42:49,033 --> 00:42:53,060
But then Elinor got sick.
613
00:42:55,372 --> 00:42:57,772
I had to take care of her and...
614
00:42:58,943 --> 00:43:01,434
She always wanted to come to Greece.
615
00:43:05,950 --> 00:43:10,444
Hey. Yesterday, I quit. This is my last tour.
616
00:43:13,958 --> 00:43:16,859
Well, it's my last tour, too.
617
00:43:20,764 --> 00:43:25,701
Georgie! How did these columns fall over?
618
00:43:26,236 --> 00:43:28,704
Well, there were two earthquakes
in the 5th and 6th century...
619
00:43:31,809 --> 00:43:35,870
The columns fell over from the incredible
pull of Ulysses' love.
620
00:43:36,280 --> 00:43:37,269
Oh!
621
00:43:37,381 --> 00:43:39,246
Isn't that sweet?
622
00:43:42,386 --> 00:43:44,115
- Better.
- Better?
623
00:43:44,221 --> 00:43:46,712
Looks like a short stack fell over.
624
00:43:47,224 --> 00:43:48,748
Come on, Barnaby.
625
00:43:55,933 --> 00:43:58,868
Hey, does everybody know
about the Olympic torch?
626
00:43:58,969 --> 00:44:00,493
This way. Come on, this way.
627
00:44:00,604 --> 00:44:04,165
Okay. That flame that you saw
being passed around the world
628
00:44:04,274 --> 00:44:07,072
is first lit by a reflection from the sun.
629
00:44:07,778 --> 00:44:11,214
All right, now, this is the palestra.
630
00:44:11,982 --> 00:44:14,780
This is where the athletes would wrestle.
631
00:44:34,271 --> 00:44:35,465
What?
632
00:44:35,572 --> 00:44:38,735
Do you need anything?
Medicine or anything at all?
633
00:44:39,109 --> 00:44:40,576
Doing okay? Hey!
634
00:44:43,113 --> 00:44:46,640
- You really are listening to nothing.
- The battery died.
635
00:44:47,317 --> 00:44:49,148
We forgot the charger.
636
00:44:50,688 --> 00:44:52,280
This trip sucks.
637
00:44:53,424 --> 00:44:54,618
Caitlin?
638
00:44:56,260 --> 00:44:58,956
It's okay. And I understand.
639
00:44:59,730 --> 00:45:02,392
- What is it you understand?
- Oh, well...
640
00:45:03,033 --> 00:45:05,501
- The genetic thing.
- What thing?
641
00:45:06,103 --> 00:45:08,571
Sorry, your husband told me
about the thing
642
00:45:08,672 --> 00:45:11,038
that makes your daughter prickly.
643
00:45:12,042 --> 00:45:13,737
Hansdorf syndrome.
644
00:45:17,514 --> 00:45:22,008
Hansdorf is my maiden name.
645
00:45:27,091 --> 00:45:28,922
That's a coincidence.
646
00:45:30,160 --> 00:45:31,320
DR. TULLEN: Stuart.
647
00:45:31,562 --> 00:45:33,689
How dare you insult me
in front of that woman?
648
00:45:33,797 --> 00:45:35,230
It was a joke, dear. Good heavens!
649
00:45:35,332 --> 00:45:37,527
- DR. TULLEN: How could you possibly say...
- Why don't you just lighten up?
650
00:46:00,390 --> 00:46:03,325
Beautiful ladies,
don't forget to smash the plates.
651
00:46:03,427 --> 00:46:05,019
- Yeah?
- Very Greek.
652
00:46:05,129 --> 00:46:06,892
Everybody. Everybody.
653
00:46:07,264 --> 00:46:10,097
The newspaper says
it's gonna rain tomorrow.
654
00:46:12,102 --> 00:46:13,364
And the good part is?
655
00:46:13,470 --> 00:46:16,371
If we all think good thoughts,
maybe we'll get some nice weather.
656
00:46:16,473 --> 00:46:17,565
Are you listening, God?
657
00:46:17,674 --> 00:46:20,268
You don't have to shout,
I'm sitting right here.
658
00:46:20,377 --> 00:46:24,677
Blue skies shining on me
659
00:46:26,383 --> 00:46:27,350
One, two, three!
660
00:46:29,586 --> 00:46:30,610
No!
661
00:46:31,088 --> 00:46:32,385
- Here you go.
- Come on!
662
00:46:32,489 --> 00:46:34,423
No, no, no!
663
00:46:35,559 --> 00:46:39,427
I'm ever so sorry,
but that Nico said it was a Greek tradition.
664
00:46:40,230 --> 00:46:42,289
- It's okay.
- Okay.
665
00:46:44,268 --> 00:46:46,395
Kimmy, stop doing the dishes
and get over here.
666
00:46:46,503 --> 00:46:48,835
Sue, bung your Khy Pass over here,
have a crack at the foosball.
667
00:46:51,175 --> 00:46:53,837
- 10 euros.
- Don't worry. Leave it to me.
668
00:46:57,047 --> 00:47:01,450
I say, that was ever such fun.
We did enjoy it. You are wonderful.
669
00:47:01,552 --> 00:47:04,316
Hello. Hello, lovely lady. Thank you.
670
00:47:05,055 --> 00:47:06,454
Silly twit.
671
00:47:10,861 --> 00:47:14,592
Dorcas, here's the deal.
You gotta stop with the stealing.
672
00:47:15,532 --> 00:47:18,194
- I'm sorry.
- Okay. Okay.
673
00:47:19,803 --> 00:47:24,035
Okay. You're a lovely woman.
I really don't mean to judge in any way.
674
00:47:24,441 --> 00:47:26,238
It's just that people are going to
start to notice...
675
00:47:26,343 --> 00:47:29,176
That's my cell phone.
And somehow, you got it out of here.
676
00:47:29,279 --> 00:47:31,975
I just want to ask... Wow! You're good.
677
00:47:34,117 --> 00:47:36,108
Actually, it was only 10.
678
00:47:36,386 --> 00:47:39,184
Well, waste not, want not, is what I say.
679
00:47:39,489 --> 00:47:40,786
All right.
680
00:47:43,961 --> 00:47:49,957
Nothing but blue skies
from now on
681
00:47:52,035 --> 00:47:54,401
I wish I could be happy like you.
682
00:47:54,705 --> 00:47:57,173
God, you've gotta get more sex.
683
00:47:57,741 --> 00:48:00,710
- Irv...
- I'm sorry, but what is it with you?
684
00:48:00,811 --> 00:48:02,711
Don't you have a boyfriend?
685
00:48:02,813 --> 00:48:04,974
I'm on a tour bus, like, six days a week.
686
00:48:05,082 --> 00:48:08,848
Well, you gotta get in touch
with your wild thing.
687
00:48:10,854 --> 00:48:13,652
I think we can get in here
and just touch on everything...
688
00:48:13,757 --> 00:48:17,056
Actually, there's someone
I'm kind of interested in.
689
00:48:17,794 --> 00:48:19,125
At the bar.
690
00:48:22,399 --> 00:48:24,424
- Yes.
- Really?
691
00:48:24,534 --> 00:48:25,831
Go for it.
692
00:48:35,212 --> 00:48:38,147
Just make sure it's zoned for a parking lot.
693
00:48:42,185 --> 00:48:43,675
I like daisies.
694
00:48:45,455 --> 00:48:47,150
I'll call you back.
695
00:48:47,357 --> 00:48:48,619
So do I.
696
00:48:49,359 --> 00:48:51,293
Two Metaxa tonics, Nick.
697
00:48:51,395 --> 00:48:51,795
So you work at an IHOP?
698
00:48:51,795 --> 00:48:53,262
So you work at an IHOP?
699
00:48:53,964 --> 00:48:56,728
Yeah, well, I mean, that makes it sound
like I'm a waiter, you know.
700
00:48:56,833 --> 00:48:59,233
I'm the number one
corporate representative for IHOP.
701
00:48:59,336 --> 00:49:01,861
I sold 100 franchises last year.
702
00:49:01,972 --> 00:49:05,499
We're expanding Ohio,
if you're looking for an investment.
703
00:49:05,609 --> 00:49:07,668
How do we say, "Cheers"?
704
00:49:08,445 --> 00:49:10,037
We say, "ya mas, to our health."
705
00:49:15,552 --> 00:49:18,487
So what do you do for fun?
706
00:49:18,855 --> 00:49:20,083
For fun?
707
00:49:22,726 --> 00:49:23,852
Syrup.
708
00:49:25,562 --> 00:49:28,292
I collect vintage syrups.
709
00:49:29,266 --> 00:49:33,760
Yeah. Some people are
into art or wines, you know.
710
00:49:33,870 --> 00:49:36,998
I'm into vintage syrups.
Not too old. When you say "vintage,"
711
00:49:37,107 --> 00:49:40,042
you think, "Oh, my God,
the guy's drinking syrup from 1912."
712
00:49:40,143 --> 00:49:42,668
No. The oldest I have is 1948.
713
00:49:42,779 --> 00:49:45,907
So it's post-war, but it's still really special.
714
00:49:46,083 --> 00:49:49,712
I mean, it's still edible. You can pote it.
It's potent, potable? Potable?
715
00:49:49,820 --> 00:49:50,809
I never watch Jeopardy!
716
00:49:50,921 --> 00:49:53,617
Anyway, so the thing that
I like about syrup is it's sweet,
717
00:49:53,724 --> 00:49:55,157
no matter how bad your day is.
718
00:49:55,258 --> 00:49:58,489
...a German waffle,
but there's also a French crepe.
719
00:49:58,595 --> 00:50:00,256
I mean, we had to have
a whole meeting in Iowa,
720
00:50:00,364 --> 00:50:02,525
because the waitresses
were calling them "craps."
721
00:50:02,632 --> 00:50:05,999
And no one wants to eat crap
so much anymore.
722
00:50:06,103 --> 00:50:07,263
Sometimes in Mississippi.
723
00:50:07,371 --> 00:50:09,430
But usually you find that
people don't want to have
724
00:50:09,539 --> 00:50:12,975
a food that's not appetizingly named,
you know.
725
00:50:13,076 --> 00:50:16,603
That's why I love any kind
of an international flair.
726
00:50:16,713 --> 00:50:20,649
Swedish crepes. It just automatically
sounds better. It's exotic.
727
00:50:20,751 --> 00:50:24,687
My favorite, though, natural.
Pecans, coconut, which is so, so good.
728
00:50:24,788 --> 00:50:28,815
It's very, very fattening, and... Not that
I have anything against fat people.
729
00:50:28,925 --> 00:50:30,825
Fat people are our biggest demographic.
730
00:50:30,927 --> 00:50:33,589
I bought two houses in Florida
off of fat people. God bless them.
731
00:50:46,243 --> 00:50:50,805
- MR. TULLEN: Good morning.
- Good morning. Hi. Good morning.
732
00:50:50,914 --> 00:50:51,881
Mmm-hmm.
733
00:50:53,250 --> 00:50:57,186
Georgia. Did I see you on a date last night?
734
00:50:58,088 --> 00:51:01,751
- How was it?
- Well, I now know the history of syrup.
735
00:51:01,858 --> 00:51:03,416
Hey, that was fun last night.
736
00:51:03,527 --> 00:51:05,927
- Maple trees rock.
- Yeah, they do.
737
00:51:06,396 --> 00:51:07,363
Mmm-hmm.
738
00:51:07,798 --> 00:51:10,733
Please, to the left here,
thank you very much.
739
00:51:11,334 --> 00:51:12,892
I see you enjoy Greece, eh?
740
00:51:13,003 --> 00:51:14,868
- Yeah.
- Yeah? For you.
741
00:51:15,338 --> 00:51:16,362
Thanks!
742
00:51:16,473 --> 00:51:19,465
Hey, listen, I can't buy for everybody, so...
743
00:51:19,810 --> 00:51:22,677
- Yeah. What does it say?
- "I love Greece."
744
00:51:24,014 --> 00:51:28,314
I do, bro! Awesome! Thank you, man!
745
00:51:29,686 --> 00:51:31,210
- Let me help you.
- Pardon?
746
00:51:31,321 --> 00:51:32,379
I'm just helping you.
747
00:51:32,489 --> 00:51:34,423
- Louder, please.
- I'm just helping you.
748
00:51:34,524 --> 00:51:37,425
- No! I can manage. Really.
- Okay.
749
00:51:37,527 --> 00:51:39,324
- Thank you.
- All right.
750
00:51:41,598 --> 00:51:43,998
Your group. Losers.
751
00:51:46,169 --> 00:51:47,534
"What? What?"
752
00:51:50,740 --> 00:51:52,469
"So hot. So hot."
753
00:51:52,576 --> 00:51:54,601
"How much is this? How much is that?"
754
00:52:04,254 --> 00:52:06,051
Hello, everybody.
755
00:52:06,156 --> 00:52:07,214
Hey!
756
00:52:08,358 --> 00:52:11,122
Don't diss my group. They're nice people.
757
00:52:12,095 --> 00:52:15,622
It's so cold in here.
758
00:52:22,672 --> 00:52:25,197
That's everyone. Except the Americans.
759
00:52:25,308 --> 00:52:29,369
Al, just think. This course
could be thousands of years old.
760
00:52:31,047 --> 00:52:34,039
Well, I wonder if Jesus ever played here.
761
00:52:34,518 --> 00:52:36,076
Big Al. Kim.
762
00:52:37,787 --> 00:52:41,814
You know how you like to get up
in front of everybody and bore us?
763
00:52:41,925 --> 00:52:43,483
Please go on.
764
00:52:43,593 --> 00:52:47,927
I have a very exciting idea.
Why don't you try entertaining everybody?
765
00:52:48,031 --> 00:52:49,555
Irv, how am I gonna do that?
766
00:52:49,666 --> 00:52:52,829
History has got a lot of dirty stories.
767
00:52:55,105 --> 00:52:56,470
Sex sells.
768
00:53:07,584 --> 00:53:10,075
Well, it turned out to be
a beautiful day.
769
00:53:10,987 --> 00:53:13,182
Thanks for the nice weather, Irv.
770
00:53:14,691 --> 00:53:15,715
Good on you, Irv.
771
00:53:15,825 --> 00:53:19,761
I thought you were joking last night.
You got some power, fellow.
772
00:53:19,863 --> 00:53:23,060
Irv, do you think you could bless Barnaby?
773
00:53:23,166 --> 00:53:25,498
Maybe he'd move a bit faster.
774
00:53:25,602 --> 00:53:30,005
I bless you in the name of Socrates,
Hippocrates and feta cheese.
775
00:53:30,574 --> 00:53:32,565
- Hallelujah.
- Hallelujah.
776
00:53:32,676 --> 00:53:35,338
This is appropriate,
because we're headed to Delphi,
777
00:53:35,445 --> 00:53:38,175
which is the most mystical spot
in all of Greece.
778
00:53:38,281 --> 00:53:42,183
In ancient times, the oracle of Delphi
would answer questions
779
00:53:42,285 --> 00:53:46,016
for kings and commoners, like,
"Who should I vote for?"
780
00:53:47,190 --> 00:53:48,953
Or other stuff.
781
00:53:52,362 --> 00:53:55,627
Like, "Shall I take a lover?"
782
00:53:55,732 --> 00:53:57,791
- Hey, look out.
- Hello.
783
00:53:58,501 --> 00:54:00,799
That's what we're talking about.
784
00:54:01,204 --> 00:54:04,173
- Now, the oracle was a virgin.
- Here we go.
785
00:54:04,274 --> 00:54:08,301
And she was dressed in flowing gowns
of sheer silk.
786
00:54:09,613 --> 00:54:12,241
Some say she wore nothing at all.
787
00:54:12,349 --> 00:54:13,941
Hey, I like that.
788
00:54:14,951 --> 00:54:16,043
Oh, my.
789
00:54:16,152 --> 00:54:18,518
And then she would inhale
the sacred vapors.
790
00:54:18,622 --> 00:54:21,591
- Louder, please.
- And she would go into raptures.
791
00:54:21,691 --> 00:54:25,923
- Louder.
- She would say, "Oh, Zeus, take my body.
792
00:54:26,663 --> 00:54:30,690
"Oh, Zeus, fill me with your wisdom.
793
00:54:31,268 --> 00:54:34,931
"Oh, Zeus, my body is your vessel.
794
00:54:39,509 --> 00:54:42,273
"Take me! Take me! Take me!"
795
00:54:44,714 --> 00:54:45,976
Poupi!
796
00:54:57,827 --> 00:54:59,954
- Caitlin, are you all right?
- I dropped my phone.
797
00:55:00,063 --> 00:55:01,462
- Everybody all right?
- Yeah.
798
00:55:01,564 --> 00:55:04,931
Alive! Alive! Please, alive, everybody.
799
00:55:08,171 --> 00:55:09,536
Okay. Okay.
800
00:55:09,906 --> 00:55:12,101
Everybody, let's get off the bus, okay?
Everybody.
801
00:55:12,776 --> 00:55:14,368
Okay, it's gonna be
about 20 more minutes.
802
00:55:14,477 --> 00:55:17,469
Irv, Olga, Svetlana? You okay?
You're alive.
803
00:55:18,682 --> 00:55:20,673
- Is everybody okay?
- Everybody's fine.
804
00:55:20,784 --> 00:55:23,719
Everybody's fine,
and we got a good story out of it.
805
00:55:23,820 --> 00:55:26,846
You know, this whole thing happened
'cause he was staring at you, Angie.
806
00:55:26,956 --> 00:55:30,392
- Who?
- Poupi. Up there.
807
00:55:31,461 --> 00:55:34,089
Creepy driver, checking out the goats.
808
00:55:34,331 --> 00:55:37,789
Angie, everyone on the bus
has a different word for it.
809
00:55:37,901 --> 00:55:40,096
I call it "mysterious."
810
00:55:40,203 --> 00:55:43,036
Personally, I think he shaved his neck
just for you.
811
00:55:43,139 --> 00:55:45,801
- What?
- He's a nice guy, go talk to him.
812
00:55:45,909 --> 00:55:47,900
Yeah, he's quiet, but he's nice.
813
00:55:48,011 --> 00:55:51,606
Fine. Yeah, sometimes he's nice,
but mostly he just makes me mad.
814
00:55:51,715 --> 00:55:54,809
Hot, not mad.
It's been so long, you forgot the difference.
815
00:55:54,918 --> 00:55:57,546
- Okay. Smile, he feels terrible.
- Come on.
816
00:55:57,654 --> 00:55:59,849
He's the one not wearing the bell.
817
00:55:59,956 --> 00:56:01,753
- Work it. Whoo!
- Kimmy.
818
00:56:16,940 --> 00:56:18,805
Sorry about your bus.
819
00:56:20,944 --> 00:56:25,381
You distracted me.
I could have killed you. All of us.
820
00:56:26,015 --> 00:56:28,848
- I was just trying to have fun.
- Oh, well...
821
00:56:30,954 --> 00:56:32,751
That's good, I guess.
822
00:56:35,091 --> 00:56:36,581
The first day,
823
00:56:37,694 --> 00:56:41,562
you asked me if I wonder
what I'm doing with my life. Right?
824
00:56:41,765 --> 00:56:43,824
- Yeah.
- Maybe I can explain.
825
00:56:45,668 --> 00:56:47,693
What do you call that guy?
826
00:56:48,338 --> 00:56:52,672
He goes in front of people
and waves his dick around.
827
00:56:53,843 --> 00:56:55,811
We called him Uncle Phil.
828
00:56:56,513 --> 00:56:58,481
What? No. No.
829
00:56:58,748 --> 00:57:00,943
He's in front of the people
who play the music.
830
00:57:01,050 --> 00:57:03,416
Stick! That's a conductor.
831
00:57:03,520 --> 00:57:06,250
Right. Right. A conductor. He comes out.
832
00:57:07,056 --> 00:57:09,388
- He waves his stick.
- His stick.
833
00:57:10,026 --> 00:57:13,826
And people get to hear
the most beautiful sounds in the world.
834
00:57:14,297 --> 00:57:18,495
He hears the music up close.
He feels it in his bones.
835
00:57:19,636 --> 00:57:22,537
And that's what my job is like. I sit there.
836
00:57:22,839 --> 00:57:25,774
I turn the wheel this way. Turn that way.
837
00:57:26,109 --> 00:57:29,806
And before me comes this great vision.
Always beautiful.
838
00:57:31,181 --> 00:57:32,773
The scenery
839
00:57:34,250 --> 00:57:37,117
is frozen.
840
00:57:38,321 --> 00:57:39,754
Frozen music.
841
00:57:42,692 --> 00:57:44,455
And you know what I like?
842
00:57:44,561 --> 00:57:47,029
You got the best seat in the house.
843
00:57:48,064 --> 00:57:49,088
Yes.
844
00:58:12,722 --> 00:58:14,053
Thank you.
845
00:58:15,158 --> 00:58:17,683
I like your passion for our history.
846
00:58:18,261 --> 00:58:20,525
But you are too busy looking up.
847
00:58:22,565 --> 00:58:23,862
Look here.
848
00:58:28,291 --> 00:58:30,657
I know, I'm touching your chests.
849
00:58:31,094 --> 00:58:32,288
Good.
850
00:58:42,171 --> 00:58:45,140
What happened with the pancake man
last night?
851
00:58:45,241 --> 00:58:46,435
Nothing.
852
00:58:47,944 --> 00:58:49,002
Good.
853
00:58:54,784 --> 00:58:56,251
Yeah!
854
00:59:07,030 --> 00:59:09,123
You can do it. Come on.
855
00:59:11,634 --> 00:59:14,865
Take deep breaths of
the healing powers of Delphi.
856
00:59:15,371 --> 00:59:17,601
Better than my workout at Curves.
857
00:59:18,575 --> 00:59:21,043
- Trick or treat?
- It's quite good, actually.
858
00:59:21,144 --> 00:59:22,907
- Come on.
- Georgia,
859
00:59:23,746 --> 00:59:26,647
it's beautiful, but, come on,
so is an escalator.
860
00:59:26,749 --> 00:59:28,979
This is a very spiritual place.
861
00:59:29,085 --> 00:59:32,316
You can actually feel the energy
coming from the ground.
862
00:59:32,422 --> 00:59:35,653
Do you feel it? This is the temple of Apollo
863
00:59:36,559 --> 00:59:38,891
and the sanctuary of the oracle.
864
00:59:39,262 --> 00:59:40,752
Come on, Barnaby.
865
00:59:40,997 --> 00:59:43,932
Now, the Pythia, or the oracle,
was hidden from everyone
866
00:59:44,033 --> 00:59:47,799
except for the high priest.
And she would crouch behind him,
867
00:59:47,904 --> 00:59:50,236
she was hidden,
and she would answer questions.
868
00:59:50,340 --> 00:59:52,501
Like, she would go,
869
00:59:54,010 --> 00:59:57,275
"The oracle is in. Any questions?"
870
00:59:58,147 --> 00:59:59,444
Wasn't she a virgin?
871
01:00:00,617 --> 01:00:02,244
- How's that?
- Yeah.
872
01:00:02,919 --> 01:00:04,853
Then maybe you better do it.
873
01:00:04,954 --> 01:00:07,320
Yeah, go on Irv. You go in there.
874
01:00:07,957 --> 01:00:10,619
You can't spell virgin without l-R-V.
875
01:00:11,928 --> 01:00:14,863
All right,
the oracle is open.
876
01:00:15,131 --> 01:00:16,359
- Anybody got a question?
- Yes.
877
01:00:16,466 --> 01:00:19,230
Are my legs good enough for a miniskirt?
878
01:00:19,969 --> 01:00:21,561
Hubba-hubba.
879
01:00:22,505 --> 01:00:24,496
I've got a serious question.
880
01:00:24,607 --> 01:00:26,802
Am I ever gonna get
cell reception up here?
881
01:00:26,909 --> 01:00:29,810
Turn the damn phone off.
This is a vacation.
882
01:00:30,380 --> 01:00:32,678
- I know that. All right.
- Guys.
883
01:00:32,915 --> 01:00:34,746
She's got one. Yeah.
884
01:00:35,852 --> 01:00:38,116
Why did my husband cheat on me?
885
01:00:38,821 --> 01:00:40,812
It wasn't you he cheated.
886
01:00:41,557 --> 01:00:46,119
Some men cheat themselves
out of living a life with a woman they love.
887
01:00:48,331 --> 01:00:49,628
Thank you.
888
01:00:51,801 --> 01:00:52,859
Okay.
889
01:00:54,070 --> 01:00:56,971
I've always wanted to start a family, but...
890
01:00:58,374 --> 01:01:01,502
Well, Big Al is
just gonna come out and say it.
891
01:01:02,612 --> 01:01:03,977
I'm scared.
892
01:01:05,281 --> 01:01:08,273
Being a parent is the best thing
in the world.
893
01:01:08,718 --> 01:01:12,677
And I guarantee you,
you're gonna be a great dad.
894
01:01:14,490 --> 01:01:16,185
- See?
- Thanks, Irv.
895
01:01:16,759 --> 01:01:20,593
Irvacle. What is it? Orvacle.
896
01:01:20,697 --> 01:01:22,164
Well, go on, Caitlin, ask a question.
897
01:01:22,265 --> 01:01:24,233
- Go on. Go on.
- No.
898
01:01:26,002 --> 01:01:27,492
Will my daughter ever stop sulking?
899
01:01:27,603 --> 01:01:30,071
Will my parents ever stop fighting?
900
01:01:30,807 --> 01:01:33,935
Parents sometimes forget
that they're an example.
901
01:01:40,717 --> 01:01:42,014
Thank you.
902
01:01:43,519 --> 01:01:46,511
Look, basically,
I gotta take a Johnny Riddle.
903
01:01:46,622 --> 01:01:48,249
Siph the pyth.
904
01:01:48,357 --> 01:01:49,915
- Where's the gents'?
- Yeah.
905
01:01:50,026 --> 01:01:52,494
- Oh! The men's room.
- Yeah. God.
906
01:01:52,595 --> 01:01:55,029
It's right up there. Oracle closed.
907
01:01:55,631 --> 01:01:57,098
Yay! Good job.
908
01:02:02,672 --> 01:02:05,539
I got a bar. I got a bar! I lost it.
909
01:02:20,389 --> 01:02:22,755
Hi, Oracle.
910
01:02:24,193 --> 01:02:28,357
I can't start something when
I'm about to leave this country. Right?
911
01:02:28,731 --> 01:02:31,222
- I mean, it's...
- What are you doing?
912
01:02:31,701 --> 01:02:33,760
I'm looking for something.
913
01:02:34,303 --> 01:02:36,601
- What?
- My dignity.
914
01:02:38,908 --> 01:02:40,034
- Georgia.
- What?
915
01:02:40,143 --> 01:02:44,637
You're looking for obstacles
rather than looking for magic.
916
01:03:01,531 --> 01:03:03,999
- This place is great.
- I felt a vibe.
917
01:03:04,167 --> 01:03:05,964
I'm so happy to hear that.
918
01:03:06,068 --> 01:03:08,059
Barnaby, do come on.
919
01:03:09,272 --> 01:03:10,899
Oh, my God!
920
01:03:12,875 --> 01:03:14,365
Barnaby!
921
01:03:14,477 --> 01:03:16,911
- What?
- Barnaby!
922
01:03:17,013 --> 01:03:18,480
What? What?
923
01:03:18,581 --> 01:03:20,947
He hasn't got his walker.
924
01:03:24,587 --> 01:03:26,578
It's the healing powers of Delphi.
925
01:03:26,689 --> 01:03:28,714
No, it was Irv.
926
01:03:28,825 --> 01:03:31,589
You heard him bless Barnaby on the bus.
927
01:03:31,694 --> 01:03:33,594
He's a miracle worker.
928
01:03:34,030 --> 01:03:36,123
Maybe he's a god of Delphi.
929
01:03:36,499 --> 01:03:39,559
I'm not a god.
That's just a rumor my mother started.
930
01:03:41,904 --> 01:03:44,634
- Okay.
- To the bus!
931
01:03:44,740 --> 01:03:47,937
- To the bus!
- Irvinator.
932
01:03:52,014 --> 01:03:53,948
Sexy! Very nice.
933
01:03:55,952 --> 01:03:58,182
- Let's go again!
- Again! Again!
934
01:03:58,487 --> 01:04:01,422
I've never even seen
this kind of alcohol before!
935
01:04:09,665 --> 01:04:11,929
- You look beautiful!
- Oh! Thank you.
936
01:04:12,034 --> 01:04:14,093
- Is it new?
- No, I had it.
937
01:04:15,638 --> 01:04:17,367
Do I have a tag? Anywhere?
938
01:04:17,473 --> 01:04:18,770
- No.
- Okay.
939
01:04:20,409 --> 01:04:21,569
Poupi?
940
01:04:23,880 --> 01:04:26,576
You ever kill a man?
941
01:04:34,991 --> 01:04:36,185
- He nodded.
- He didn't nod!
942
01:04:36,292 --> 01:04:37,884
- I saw him nod.
- Look, a nod is that.
943
01:04:37,994 --> 01:04:40,394
- That's $700.
- He didn't... No. Bet's off.
944
01:04:40,496 --> 01:04:41,963
No, I saw him nod.
945
01:04:43,666 --> 01:04:45,634
You looking for somebody?
946
01:04:47,069 --> 01:04:48,093
No.
947
01:04:48,404 --> 01:04:50,235
Really? Me, neither.
948
01:04:54,911 --> 01:05:00,679
Irv, don't you think everyone in the group
seems healthier and alive?
949
01:05:01,984 --> 01:05:04,111
- Yes, I do.
- It's Delphi.
950
01:05:06,355 --> 01:05:08,050
Or maybe you're God?
951
01:05:08,157 --> 01:05:09,317
- Georgia.
- Yeah?
952
01:05:09,425 --> 01:05:12,189
I haven't made a number two
since Chicago.
953
01:05:12,361 --> 01:05:15,023
If I was God, I would fix that first.
954
01:05:15,131 --> 01:05:17,531
Okay, maybe you're not the God,
but maybe you're a Greek god.
955
01:05:17,633 --> 01:05:18,930
Like Zeus or Apollo.
956
01:05:19,035 --> 01:05:20,161
- That's true.
- Yeah.
957
01:05:20,269 --> 01:05:22,169
- No, no. No, I'm Zeus.
- I knew it.
958
01:05:22,271 --> 01:05:25,365
I'm Zeus.
I'm casting a spell on you and Poupi.
959
01:05:26,475 --> 01:05:30,070
- Irv, you know what? I can't.
- That's it.
960
01:05:30,446 --> 01:05:32,346
- Where are you going?
- I'm going to bed.
961
01:05:32,448 --> 01:05:36,441
But the guy that you're not looking for
went that way.
962
01:05:37,420 --> 01:05:38,580
- Okay.
- Georgia.
963
01:05:38,688 --> 01:05:39,746
What?
964
01:05:40,356 --> 01:05:42,551
I think you have a bigger problem.
965
01:05:42,658 --> 01:05:44,091
Yeah, Greece!
966
01:05:46,996 --> 01:05:47,963
Oh!
967
01:05:54,603 --> 01:05:55,570
Oh...
968
01:05:59,809 --> 01:06:01,208
Hey, Gator!
969
01:06:02,178 --> 01:06:03,611
Hey! Georgia!
970
01:06:03,713 --> 01:06:06,614
Georgia, I've been kicking
these guys' asses!
971
01:06:06,849 --> 01:06:08,783
- Asses!
- Asses.
972
01:06:09,552 --> 01:06:11,110
Hey, where'd you get this shirt?
973
01:06:11,220 --> 01:06:12,653
- You like it?
- Yeah.
974
01:06:12,755 --> 01:06:14,723
- That guy Nico gave it to me.
- Yeah.
975
01:06:14,824 --> 01:06:17,349
- He's so cool!
- And it's got Greek writing on it.
976
01:06:17,460 --> 01:06:20,691
- Yeah! It's got, "I love Greece!"
- Yeah, it says...
977
01:06:32,441 --> 01:06:33,772
Excuse me.
978
01:06:33,976 --> 01:06:36,740
- Greek toes taste funny to you, hey?
- Yes.
979
01:06:37,913 --> 01:06:38,902
No, no, no, no.
980
01:06:40,116 --> 01:06:41,105
Orgy!
981
01:06:41,951 --> 01:06:43,714
I get the tour guide!
982
01:06:45,755 --> 01:06:46,881
Gator!
983
01:06:49,058 --> 01:06:50,491
Fifty on Gator.
984
01:06:50,659 --> 01:06:51,819
Gator!
985
01:07:14,750 --> 01:07:16,911
- Hello.
- Hello.
986
01:07:18,187 --> 01:07:20,018
- You want to sit?
- Yes.
987
01:07:20,156 --> 01:07:22,181
- Let me.
- Thank you.
988
01:07:25,227 --> 01:07:31,166
I just wanted to tell you that I really liked
what you said today about driving the bus.
989
01:07:34,403 --> 01:07:35,893
It was poetry.
990
01:07:36,005 --> 01:07:38,303
- No, it wasn't.
- Yes.
991
01:07:38,407 --> 01:07:42,503
- Where did you learn English?
- I rode my motorcycle across England.
992
01:07:44,113 --> 01:07:45,444
Of course.
993
01:07:46,382 --> 01:07:48,680
Wait. What should we drink to?
994
01:07:49,819 --> 01:07:52,117
It's my birthday in six months.
995
01:07:53,055 --> 01:07:54,545
You will be 25?
996
01:07:55,458 --> 01:07:56,857
Yes, I will.
997
01:08:07,636 --> 01:08:09,297
So... Oh!
998
01:08:15,945 --> 01:08:19,938
Thank you. I should eat more fruit.
It's healthy.
999
01:08:22,585 --> 01:08:24,177
It's really good.
1000
01:08:27,156 --> 01:08:30,216
So I just wanted to tell you...
1001
01:08:32,628 --> 01:08:36,086
You're such a nice guy. And I'm...
Okay, look.
1002
01:08:38,134 --> 01:08:39,795
This can't happen.
1003
01:08:39,902 --> 01:08:43,338
But it must.
You said you haven't made love in forever.
1004
01:08:44,340 --> 01:08:46,274
Yeah, when I thought
you didn't speak English.
1005
01:08:46,375 --> 01:08:49,401
You know what?
I've decided I'm leaving Greece,
1006
01:08:49,812 --> 01:08:52,303
because this whole moving here
was an experiment
1007
01:08:52,414 --> 01:08:54,905
to be brave and spontaneous, and...
1008
01:08:57,520 --> 01:08:58,612
Okay.
1009
01:09:04,727 --> 01:09:07,958
You know,
this whole impulsive and crazy and,
1010
01:09:08,063 --> 01:09:10,930
you know, jump into a thing, thing?
1011
01:09:11,734 --> 01:09:13,258
- Georgia?
- Yeah?
1012
01:09:14,036 --> 01:09:15,936
Your butt is too small.
1013
01:09:16,539 --> 01:09:17,904
That did it.
1014
01:09:45,434 --> 01:09:48,597
Is this the first time you made love
to a tour guide?
1015
01:09:48,771 --> 01:09:50,864
No. This was the third time.
1016
01:09:51,640 --> 01:09:53,073
- What?
- Yes.
1017
01:09:53,175 --> 01:09:56,110
The first time was two hours ago
by the boat.
1018
01:09:58,047 --> 01:10:01,107
- Second time, elevator.
- And the night is young.
1019
01:10:01,450 --> 01:10:02,610
Yeah.
1020
01:10:06,622 --> 01:10:08,089
What was that?
1021
01:10:08,624 --> 01:10:09,921
The Tullens?
1022
01:10:10,025 --> 01:10:11,686
Let's go find out.
1023
01:10:12,228 --> 01:10:14,924
- Come on. Come on. Come on.
- Look at me.
1024
01:10:24,206 --> 01:10:25,833
- Hi.
- Hi.
1025
01:10:29,845 --> 01:10:31,506
- Hi.
- Hi.
1026
01:10:35,751 --> 01:10:37,981
- Hi.
- Hi.
1027
01:10:41,390 --> 01:10:43,017
- Hi.
- Hi.
1028
01:10:46,328 --> 01:10:47,295
Hi.
1029
01:10:47,396 --> 01:10:48,385
- Hi.
- Hi.
1030
01:10:49,832 --> 01:10:50,856
Hi.
1031
01:10:51,967 --> 01:10:53,901
- What time is it?
- Yeah.
1032
01:10:54,003 --> 01:10:55,595
I have to drive.
1033
01:10:57,640 --> 01:11:00,268
Irv! I don't know how you do it.
1034
01:11:01,110 --> 01:11:04,671
Little blue pill. Pfizer make it.
Medicare pay for it.
1035
01:11:07,316 --> 01:11:08,749
I'm sweating.
1036
01:11:08,951 --> 01:11:10,748
Oh! Hello.
1037
01:11:11,520 --> 01:11:13,715
Hot in your rooms, too, is it?
1038
01:11:15,424 --> 01:11:17,517
Yeah, it's hot. It's...
1039
01:11:19,561 --> 01:11:21,028
- Dorcas?
- Yes?
1040
01:11:21,597 --> 01:11:25,624
- Irv, do you wanna do something crazy?
- What did you have in mind?
1041
01:11:25,834 --> 01:11:27,358
A little swap.
1042
01:11:28,704 --> 01:11:30,467
I think I'm gonna need another blue pill.
1043
01:11:30,572 --> 01:11:32,403
Not that kind of swap!
1044
01:11:37,780 --> 01:11:40,908
Poor Nico. Did you hurt your lip?
1045
01:11:41,016 --> 01:11:42,711
No, it's nothing.
1046
01:11:42,818 --> 01:11:44,547
You hurt your head.
1047
01:11:44,953 --> 01:11:48,480
Poor Nico, let me kiss it better.
1048
01:11:51,293 --> 01:11:54,456
Now I'll buy us all a drink. Waiter!
1049
01:12:08,377 --> 01:12:09,366
Yes.
1050
01:12:29,732 --> 01:12:31,256
I feel so tired.
1051
01:12:32,568 --> 01:12:34,695
- Good night.
- Good night.
1052
01:12:35,371 --> 01:12:36,804
Good night.
1053
01:12:39,041 --> 01:12:40,770
Good night, you two.
1054
01:12:59,862 --> 01:13:02,729
- Good morning, good morning.
- Good morning.
1055
01:13:03,198 --> 01:13:04,460
Good morning.
1056
01:13:04,566 --> 01:13:05,590
- Hey!
- Ahhh!
1057
01:13:06,301 --> 01:13:07,461
Gotcha.
1058
01:13:08,837 --> 01:13:10,532
- Irv.
- Gesundheit.
1059
01:13:11,707 --> 01:13:13,004
- Good morning.
- Hey, rip-snort.
1060
01:13:13,108 --> 01:13:14,769
Okay. Right back at you.
1061
01:13:14,877 --> 01:13:16,970
- Hot today, huh, Nico?
- So?
1062
01:13:17,546 --> 01:13:18,877
Yo, Gator.
1063
01:13:20,282 --> 01:13:21,306
Morning, gang!
1064
01:13:21,417 --> 01:13:24,181
Georgia. How are you this morning?
1065
01:13:25,354 --> 01:13:29,085
- Fine, thank you. And how are you?
- Excellent.
1066
01:13:32,895 --> 01:13:34,863
8:00 a.m. and already hot?
1067
01:13:36,331 --> 01:13:38,196
Good morning, Caitlin.
1068
01:13:45,941 --> 01:13:49,968
- Poupi, do you know of a close beach?
- Of course.
1069
01:13:50,078 --> 01:13:53,479
And do you have any
16-year-old handsome nephews?
1070
01:13:54,216 --> 01:13:57,151
- Of course.
- Good. Will you call him for me?
1071
01:13:57,453 --> 01:13:58,943
- Good.
- Hey, wait.
1072
01:13:59,054 --> 01:14:00,351
- Yes.
- Why?
1073
01:14:00,956 --> 01:14:03,254
I like to keep my options open.
1074
01:14:08,564 --> 01:14:13,024
Wow! Is it hot, huh? Sorry about that.
1075
01:14:14,436 --> 01:14:17,496
Poupi? What do you say we try the AC?
1076
01:14:19,308 --> 01:14:21,242
- Are you sure?
- Well...
1077
01:14:21,343 --> 01:14:22,503
MR. TULLEN: Oh, no, please.
1078
01:14:22,611 --> 01:14:25,546
I don't want to be asphyxiated
all over again.
1079
01:14:26,114 --> 01:14:28,912
Well, Irv?
Maybe you could work your magic?
1080
01:14:30,652 --> 01:14:34,213
Boogie-woogie, bully-bully.
Whirlpool working!
1081
01:14:38,494 --> 01:14:39,984
Hey, it works!
1082
01:14:41,430 --> 01:14:42,897
That's lovely.
1083
01:14:42,998 --> 01:14:44,329
That's great, Irvinator.
1084
01:14:47,803 --> 01:14:50,431
We've got a packed schedule today.
The Mycenaean tombs,
1085
01:14:50,539 --> 01:14:54,498
a tour of a monastery,
then a stop at the Thessaloniki Museum.
1086
01:14:57,112 --> 01:15:02,675
But we're not doing any of that.
Because Caitlin wants to go to the beach.
1087
01:15:04,553 --> 01:15:06,714
- Yeah!
- Yeah!
1088
01:15:07,956 --> 01:15:09,423
Hit it, Poupi.
1089
01:15:11,059 --> 01:15:13,289
And now we dance.
1090
01:15:16,865 --> 01:15:18,730
Georgia's got some moves!
1091
01:15:18,834 --> 01:15:20,096
- Here we go.
- No, I'm not dancing.
1092
01:15:20,202 --> 01:15:23,330
- Come on, come on. Up you get.
- No, no. I'm not.
1093
01:15:24,740 --> 01:15:29,200
Come on! Everybody up!
Put your arms like this! Yes!
1094
01:15:51,833 --> 01:15:53,357
This is great!
1095
01:16:01,577 --> 01:16:03,238
And go!
1096
01:16:03,345 --> 01:16:05,677
Come on! Come on! Come on!
1097
01:16:11,019 --> 01:16:13,419
I've got money in my pocket
1098
01:16:13,522 --> 01:16:15,752
I've got loving in the air
1099
01:16:15,857 --> 01:16:18,155
There is nothing that will stop me
1100
01:16:18,260 --> 01:16:20,490
And I really just don't care
1101
01:16:23,699 --> 01:16:25,530
Elizabeth, dear,
do please come out of there.
1102
01:16:25,634 --> 01:16:28,467
DR. TULLEN: I won't, I don't want to
get sunburned.
1103
01:16:29,805 --> 01:16:34,105
If you don't come out,
I'm going to tell everyone how old you are.
1104
01:16:35,711 --> 01:16:37,269
You know you set my world on fire
1105
01:16:37,379 --> 01:16:40,780
- It's got to be love
- It's got to be love from the very start
1106
01:16:40,882 --> 01:16:42,873
It's got to be love not a broken heart
1107
01:16:42,985 --> 01:16:45,715
Well, that was certainly worth the wait.
1108
01:16:45,821 --> 01:16:47,584
You know you set my world on fire
1109
01:16:47,689 --> 01:16:50,351
- It's got to be love
- It's got to be love from the very start
1110
01:16:50,459 --> 01:16:52,120
Here. My nephew.
1111
01:16:52,294 --> 01:16:56,788
Feel like jumping in the river
or dancing in the rain
1112
01:16:57,232 --> 01:17:01,692
The different places smiling faces
It always make my day
1113
01:17:01,837 --> 01:17:06,331
And all are happy people
just following your dream
1114
01:17:06,775 --> 01:17:10,973
'Cause everything you want
is not a fly-by fantasy
1115
01:17:13,649 --> 01:17:16,447
- What's your name?
- Caitlin. What's yours?
1116
01:17:16,952 --> 01:17:18,817
I'm Doudi, Doudi Kakas.
1117
01:17:21,857 --> 01:17:22,949
Of course.
1118
01:17:23,425 --> 01:17:26,394
- It's got to be love
- It's got to be love from the very start
1119
01:17:26,495 --> 01:17:28,827
It's got to be love not a broken heart
1120
01:17:28,930 --> 01:17:31,728
Come on! Get in there! Tsunami time!
1121
01:17:31,833 --> 01:17:33,357
You know you set my world on fire
1122
01:17:33,468 --> 01:17:35,959
- It's got to be love
- It's got to be love from the very start
1123
01:17:36,071 --> 01:17:38,039
It's got to be love not a broken heart
1124
01:17:38,140 --> 01:17:40,836
- It's got to be love
- It's got to be love my one true desire
1125
01:17:40,942 --> 01:17:43,433
You know you set my world on fire
1126
01:17:53,588 --> 01:17:55,021
- It's got to be love
- It's got to be love from the very start
1127
01:17:55,123 --> 01:17:57,318
You know you set my world on fire
1128
01:17:57,426 --> 01:17:59,951
It's got to be love
1129
01:18:00,062 --> 01:18:02,155
You know you set my world on fire
1130
01:18:04,733 --> 01:18:05,859
Here.
1131
01:18:13,809 --> 01:18:16,334
A woman sends me kisses on the wind.
1132
01:18:24,486 --> 01:18:26,054
Hoping they will bring love to her.
1133
01:18:26,054 --> 01:18:26,986
Hoping they will bring love to her.
1134
01:18:34,930 --> 01:18:37,490
She's waiting for a long time.
1135
01:18:58,687 --> 01:19:00,416
You waited too long.
1136
01:19:01,456 --> 01:19:05,051
Well, I had to give you a few years
to sow some wild oats.
1137
01:19:05,627 --> 01:19:07,151
You're welcome!
1138
01:19:09,464 --> 01:19:11,022
I've missed you.
1139
01:19:13,101 --> 01:19:15,194
Not as much as I missed you.
1140
01:19:20,542 --> 01:19:22,407
...of a woman in love.
1141
01:19:31,453 --> 01:19:32,920
That's lovely.
1142
01:19:34,756 --> 01:19:35,916
Classic.
1143
01:19:36,024 --> 01:19:39,118
- All right, who wants the last pancake?
- Delicious.
1144
01:19:39,227 --> 01:19:41,195
Hook me up! Hook me up now!
1145
01:19:41,530 --> 01:19:43,828
I feel like I've had a month of Sundays.
1146
01:19:43,932 --> 01:19:46,025
I'm gonna re-up the firewood
to get a bigger fire.
1147
01:19:46,134 --> 01:19:49,103
Hey, I've got something better for that fire.
1148
01:19:49,304 --> 01:19:50,362
Whoa!
1149
01:19:53,074 --> 01:19:54,905
Yes! Yeah!
1150
01:19:56,011 --> 01:19:57,273
She did it.
1151
01:19:57,379 --> 01:19:59,006
That really burns.
1152
01:19:59,314 --> 01:20:00,781
It's a blazer!
1153
01:20:02,884 --> 01:20:04,511
Keep your day job.
1154
01:20:06,087 --> 01:20:07,782
- All right.
- What?
1155
01:20:07,889 --> 01:20:09,516
- Oh, yeah.
- Not the cell phone.
1156
01:20:09,624 --> 01:20:11,057
No, no, no, you're not.
1157
01:20:11,159 --> 01:20:12,888
Yes! Yes! Burn it.
1158
01:20:14,596 --> 01:20:16,655
I cannot believe you just did that.
1159
01:20:16,765 --> 01:20:18,198
I feel lighter.
1160
01:20:18,300 --> 01:20:20,234
I can't believe it. Irv?
1161
01:20:21,469 --> 01:20:22,834
- Irv!
- Wait.
1162
01:20:23,405 --> 01:20:25,168
- What happened?
- Irv.
1163
01:20:26,441 --> 01:20:28,170
- Irv!
- What's wrong?
1164
01:20:31,847 --> 01:20:34,077
- Call an ambulance!
- I'll do it.
1165
01:20:34,182 --> 01:20:37,345
DR. TULLEN: Now, you stay with us!
And you listen to my voice, all right?
1166
01:20:37,452 --> 01:20:39,443
Irv? Irv?
1167
01:20:41,423 --> 01:20:44,620
So we've been told the hospital
is keeping him for observation.
1168
01:20:44,726 --> 01:20:46,421
They're gonna run some tests and...
1169
01:20:46,528 --> 01:20:48,928
- When does he get out?
- Well, they're not sure, Gator.
1170
01:20:49,030 --> 01:20:52,591
They really aren't. The doctors actually
won't know anything until he wakes up.
1171
01:20:52,701 --> 01:20:55,829
But, look, they don't know Irv
like we do, right?
1172
01:20:55,937 --> 01:20:57,632
- Right.
- Yeah.
1173
01:20:58,506 --> 01:21:00,667
All right. This is the propylaeum.
1174
01:21:00,775 --> 01:21:03,243
Just up those stairs is the Parthenon.
1175
01:21:03,879 --> 01:21:05,813
How many more stairs?
1176
01:21:06,147 --> 01:21:08,672
About 30, 50. A lot.
1177
01:21:10,018 --> 01:21:11,383
It's okay.
1178
01:21:11,953 --> 01:21:16,583
We're tired, and the stress of Irv is... Yeah.
1179
01:21:18,093 --> 01:21:20,425
Anyone who wants to, follow me.
1180
01:21:49,557 --> 01:21:51,286
Incredible, isn't it?
1181
01:21:52,894 --> 01:21:55,158
- Tell us about it.
- Yeah, what's the John Dory?
1182
01:21:55,263 --> 01:21:59,791
Well, we have traveled
within a very mysterious triangle.
1183
01:22:00,635 --> 01:22:03,331
Delphi, Athens, Olympia.
1184
01:22:04,205 --> 01:22:09,802
And this city, Athens, got its name
from the goddess of wisdom, Athena.
1185
01:22:10,545 --> 01:22:13,514
And the Parthenon was built to honor her.
1186
01:22:13,949 --> 01:22:16,008
It was finished in 432 B.C.
1187
01:22:19,154 --> 01:22:21,622
Let me tell you why I love it here.
1188
01:22:23,158 --> 01:22:26,855
Listen to the sound of the wind
blowing through the columns.
1189
01:22:34,502 --> 01:22:39,132
That is the same wind that
mankind has listened to for centuries.
1190
01:22:40,342 --> 01:22:44,802
It's the sound of nature
meeting human imagination.
1191
01:22:47,482 --> 01:22:50,144
And for me, that's history.
1192
01:22:53,054 --> 01:22:54,919
I tell you what, Angie.
1193
01:22:55,357 --> 01:22:57,882
It's just plain beautiful. That's what it is.
1194
01:22:57,993 --> 01:23:00,621
- It was lovely.
- Best thing I ever set eyes on.
1195
01:23:00,729 --> 01:23:02,458
It's Greek-alicious.
1196
01:23:06,868 --> 01:23:08,199
Yes, Gator.
1197
01:23:08,903 --> 01:23:10,768
There's still something I haven't seen.
1198
01:23:10,872 --> 01:23:11,964
What's that?
1199
01:23:12,073 --> 01:23:13,665
A Greek hospital.
1200
01:23:16,044 --> 01:23:17,033
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
1201
01:23:17,145 --> 01:23:19,943
- Good call, Gator.
- I'd like to see one of those, too.
1202
01:23:20,048 --> 01:23:22,676
I know a good one. I'll take us all.
1203
01:23:23,218 --> 01:23:26,051
Fine, fine, take your stupid pictures
1204
01:23:26,154 --> 01:23:28,520
and I go get you some ice cream.
1205
01:23:29,057 --> 01:23:30,786
Good morning, Nico.
1206
01:23:31,192 --> 01:23:34,389
Yeah? I have a headache in my head.
1207
01:23:34,496 --> 01:23:38,159
The bus air conditioner, it break,
and these American idiots
1208
01:23:38,266 --> 01:23:40,757
never stops to complain,
complain, complain.
1209
01:23:40,869 --> 01:23:42,427
Wait a minute!
1210
01:23:42,537 --> 01:23:45,506
Did you just call us Americans?
1211
01:23:45,707 --> 01:23:48,471
Americans, Canadians.
What's the difference?
1212
01:23:48,576 --> 01:23:49,804
You jerk!
1213
01:23:57,986 --> 01:23:59,453
Runs like a sheila!
1214
01:24:01,823 --> 01:24:04,621
And the Greek word for hospital
is nosocomio.
1215
01:24:04,726 --> 01:24:05,750
Say it with me.
1216
01:24:07,162 --> 01:24:09,756
Very good. This is one of
the finest hospitals in Athens.
1217
01:24:09,864 --> 01:24:11,855
Only the best for our Irv.
1218
01:24:12,767 --> 01:24:14,166
- Hey, hey, hey.
- Irv!
1219
01:24:16,504 --> 01:24:17,471
Dude!
1220
01:24:18,706 --> 01:24:19,866
This nice guy is for you.
1221
01:24:19,974 --> 01:24:21,601
You coming
to the farewell party tonight, then?
1222
01:24:21,709 --> 01:24:22,767
Here you go, mate,
shove that down your gullet.
1223
01:24:22,877 --> 01:24:24,902
This is great. Thank you, all.
1224
01:24:25,013 --> 01:24:27,743
- Looking good, Irv.
- Made in America, Irv.
1225
01:24:28,083 --> 01:24:29,380
Because you missed the Parthenon.
1226
01:24:29,484 --> 01:24:32,749
- Wear it in good health, boss.
- You're in the pink, Irv.
1227
01:24:32,854 --> 01:24:34,014
Friends.
1228
01:24:35,090 --> 01:24:36,284
This is great.
1229
01:24:36,391 --> 01:24:38,951
So many visitors. Nice.
1230
01:24:39,394 --> 01:24:41,919
- Now get out, yes.
- Take care of him.
1231
01:24:42,497 --> 01:24:43,964
Get well, Irv.
1232
01:24:44,699 --> 01:24:47,167
- You're looking good, Irv.
- Hey, stay up, man.
1233
01:24:47,268 --> 01:24:49,361
- Yo, Gator.
- On you, mate.
1234
01:24:50,839 --> 01:24:53,069
- Bye, Irv.
- Dorcas.
1235
01:24:55,910 --> 01:24:57,138
Bye, Irv.
1236
01:25:00,181 --> 01:25:01,478
Thank you.
1237
01:25:02,851 --> 01:25:04,216
My pleasure.
1238
01:25:25,840 --> 01:25:27,205
Say, "Cheese."
1239
01:25:29,077 --> 01:25:32,376
Great buffet, Ange.
These baklavas are a riot.
1240
01:25:33,815 --> 01:25:37,876
Angie, I've got benecoupola and dolmades
and they look very good.
1241
01:25:37,986 --> 01:25:42,218
- Or, as they say in Greek, poli kala.
- That's pretty good.
1242
01:25:42,323 --> 01:25:46,225
Hey, listen, it's not a big deal,
but my name is not Angie or Ange.
1243
01:25:46,327 --> 01:25:48,420
Yeah. We know. It's Georgia.
1244
01:25:49,197 --> 01:25:51,324
So why do you call me Angie?
1245
01:25:51,666 --> 01:25:54,726
Look at you.
You look just like Angelina Jolie.
1246
01:25:55,236 --> 01:25:57,466
You know,
that actress that adopts everybody.
1247
01:25:57,572 --> 01:26:00,541
- We love her.
- You must get that all the time.
1248
01:26:01,075 --> 01:26:02,906
Yes, I do. Yes.
1249
01:26:06,214 --> 01:26:07,806
Look who's here.
1250
01:26:11,553 --> 01:26:13,418
- Hi.
- Caitlin, hi.
1251
01:26:14,155 --> 01:26:15,952
- For you.
- Thank you.
1252
01:26:16,057 --> 01:26:18,048
MR. TULLEN: Let's have a look at you.
1253
01:26:18,159 --> 01:26:21,185
No, I cannot count the ways
1254
01:26:22,197 --> 01:26:25,826
You have made my life so blessed
1255
01:26:26,167 --> 01:26:30,035
All I know is that you came
1256
01:26:30,138 --> 01:26:33,801
And made beauty of my mess
1257
01:26:33,908 --> 01:26:37,605
You make me happy
1258
01:26:37,712 --> 01:26:40,579
You make me feel the way I do
1259
01:26:40,682 --> 01:26:42,013
Hey, Poups.
1260
01:26:42,850 --> 01:26:47,514
You know, you turned out to be all right
for a guy that doesn't say much.
1261
01:26:49,257 --> 01:26:52,249
- Am I interrupting something?
- It's all right.
1262
01:26:53,161 --> 01:26:54,458
Excuse me.
1263
01:26:56,464 --> 01:26:58,591
- I'll get some wine.
- Okay.
1264
01:26:58,700 --> 01:27:00,793
Georgie, I got these for you.
1265
01:27:00,902 --> 01:27:03,166
Dorcas, you shouldn't do this.
1266
01:27:04,005 --> 01:27:06,496
It's all right. I've got the receipt.
1267
01:27:07,709 --> 01:27:10,337
- Good for you.
- Well, it's a start.
1268
01:27:14,549 --> 01:27:15,516
Oh.
1269
01:27:16,050 --> 01:27:18,712
- Georgia. I saw you.
- Good.
1270
01:27:19,520 --> 01:27:21,488
To my hand you can speak.
1271
01:27:22,457 --> 01:27:24,550
You wrote this. "Excellent."
1272
01:27:24,792 --> 01:27:27,590
"Georgia is terrific."
"Georgia is wonderful."
1273
01:27:27,695 --> 01:27:30,664
"You are so lucky
to have someone like Angie."
1274
01:27:30,765 --> 01:27:32,790
I look like Angelina Jolie.
1275
01:27:32,900 --> 01:27:34,834
No, you don't. Who wrote this?
1276
01:27:34,936 --> 01:27:37,131
- I did. I wrote that.
- I did.
1277
01:27:37,238 --> 01:27:39,536
- I did.
- I totally did.
1278
01:27:39,641 --> 01:27:41,541
- We love Angie.
- Georgia.
1279
01:27:41,643 --> 01:27:43,372
- She's the best.
- Thank you, guys.
1280
01:27:43,478 --> 01:27:45,503
It's a fluke. So no raise.
1281
01:27:45,613 --> 01:27:46,671
Fine.
1282
01:27:47,448 --> 01:27:50,110
All right, 10%. That's as high as I go.
1283
01:27:50,218 --> 01:27:51,276
Okay.
1284
01:27:51,753 --> 01:27:53,186
You didn't get a letter from me, did you?
1285
01:27:53,288 --> 01:27:55,813
Sure I did. Butt-smoocher.
1286
01:27:57,558 --> 01:28:00,686
"Dear Maria,
you are my only friend in Greece."
1287
01:28:01,129 --> 01:28:03,427
The rest got stained. Coffee?
1288
01:28:05,700 --> 01:28:06,758
Coffee?
1289
01:28:06,868 --> 01:28:09,735
Everybody should take the time
for a coffee.
1290
01:28:10,071 --> 01:28:13,336
I've heard everyone should take time
for a coffee.
1291
01:28:13,441 --> 01:28:16,103
I just said that. What?
1292
01:28:16,911 --> 01:28:19,209
You found your kefi.
1293
01:28:20,014 --> 01:28:21,106
Yes.
1294
01:28:22,183 --> 01:28:24,242
And who the hell are you?
1295
01:28:24,752 --> 01:28:25,620
- Procopi.
- Who?
1296
01:28:25,620 --> 01:28:26,644
- Procopi.
- Who?
1297
01:28:27,221 --> 01:28:30,088
- Poupi Kakas.
- Shut up.
1298
01:28:30,725 --> 01:28:33,523
Maria, will you make me a full-time driver?
1299
01:28:33,628 --> 01:28:38,190
Okay. Georgia, 20%. That's as high as I go.
1300
01:28:38,299 --> 01:28:40,767
Okay. Why are you being nice to me?
1301
01:28:47,775 --> 01:28:50,300
- It's open.
- Michigan University.
1302
01:28:50,812 --> 01:28:52,677
You got the job there.
1303
01:29:00,388 --> 01:29:02,015
I have a job here.
1304
01:29:04,225 --> 01:29:08,958
And it won't be easy.
Nico? He quit. Mama's boy.
1305
01:29:09,630 --> 01:29:12,064
I knew his father. Same thing.
1306
01:29:13,368 --> 01:29:16,201
- Are you sure?
- Yes, I'm sure.
1307
01:29:16,938 --> 01:29:19,406
- lf you'll be my driver.
- Of course.
1308
01:29:20,842 --> 01:29:23,811
- Will you hold on just a second?
- I'm waiting.
1309
01:29:27,181 --> 01:29:29,240
Everyone. Everyone.
1310
01:29:29,350 --> 01:29:32,979
I'm so happy I met you,
and I'm gonna miss you all.
1311
01:29:33,755 --> 01:29:35,245
To Georgia!
1312
01:29:36,090 --> 01:29:37,751
To Georgia!
1313
01:29:38,226 --> 01:29:40,126
- To Irv!
- To the Irvinator.
1314
01:29:41,896 --> 01:29:44,490
Okay, so I'm staying in Greece.
1315
01:29:45,600 --> 01:29:47,966
I have no idea what's going to happen.
1316
01:29:48,069 --> 01:29:51,197
But as the man says,
"How do you plan life?"
1317
01:29:51,839 --> 01:29:54,706
I've waited a long time to be this happy.
1318
01:29:55,610 --> 01:29:57,771
And the thing about happy...
1319
01:29:58,446 --> 01:30:00,539
Wait. What was I saying?
1320
01:30:01,182 --> 01:30:03,616
Yeah, I'm gonna enjoy it.
1321
01:30:13,795 --> 01:30:16,229
- Teach me to dance.
- Dance?
1322
01:30:17,231 --> 01:30:19,165
Did you say dance?
1323
01:30:25,273 --> 01:30:27,468
And now we dance.
1324
01:35:11,892 --> 01:35:12,859
English - US - SDH