1 00:01:10,390 --> 00:01:15,062 We've only just begun 2 00:01:16,856 --> 00:01:20,567 Before the rising sun 3 00:01:23,154 --> 00:01:26,490 We've only just begun 4 00:01:26,532 --> 00:01:29,368 Day by day 5 00:01:29,410 --> 00:01:31,829 Together 6 00:01:33,205 --> 00:01:35,124 Oh, and together 7 00:01:35,166 --> 00:01:36,667 Just the two of us 8 00:01:58,398 --> 00:01:59,566 What is that? 9 00:02:05,822 --> 00:02:07,240 Oh, come on! 10 00:02:16,708 --> 00:02:18,710 Shut up! 11 00:02:43,528 --> 00:02:45,196 Kiss! 12 00:02:45,238 --> 00:02:47,406 The devil's music. 13 00:02:50,409 --> 00:02:53,329 You say you wanna go for a spin 14 00:02:53,371 --> 00:02:56,708 The party's just begun, we'll let you in 15 00:02:56,750 --> 00:02:58,876 You drive us wild 16 00:02:59,085 --> 00:03:01,337 We'll drive you crazy 17 00:03:03,882 --> 00:03:05,342 You keep on shouting 18 00:03:07,553 --> 00:03:09,387 I can't fucking hear you! 19 00:03:10,763 --> 00:03:15,185 I wanna rock and roll all night 20 00:03:16,562 --> 00:03:18,105 And party every day 21 00:03:34,454 --> 00:03:35,789 You keep on shouting 22 00:03:37,333 --> 00:03:38,793 What? 23 00:03:38,793 --> 00:03:40,711 Give it to me, baby! 24 00:03:40,711 --> 00:03:45,216 I wanna rock and roll all night 25 00:03:45,300 --> 00:03:46,634 Let's party 26 00:03:46,634 --> 00:03:48,303 And party every day 27 00:03:48,344 --> 00:03:50,305 I wanna rock 28 00:03:50,305 --> 00:03:52,097 I wanna rock until I die 29 00:04:12,036 --> 00:04:14,787 Thank you, Cleveland! 30 00:04:14,787 --> 00:04:16,247 You've been great... 31 00:04:16,331 --> 00:04:20,002 but after three and a half hours of kick-ass rock and roll... 32 00:04:20,044 --> 00:04:22,129 and seven encores on top of that... 33 00:04:22,171 --> 00:04:25,214 I'm sorry to say we gotta get back to our hotel rooms... 34 00:04:25,256 --> 00:04:28,135 and fuck some groupies, so... 35 00:04:32,264 --> 00:04:34,224 What are you doing, man? 36 00:04:34,267 --> 00:04:36,185 Fuckin' asshole, man. 37 00:04:36,185 --> 00:04:37,603 That's my bass. 38 00:04:37,644 --> 00:04:40,564 Just one more day of school to get through, girls... 39 00:04:40,606 --> 00:04:41,732 before tomorrow night. 40 00:04:41,774 --> 00:04:47,196 Come on, all Detroit, Michigan, you wanted the best! 41 00:04:47,196 --> 00:04:49,198 You got the best! 42 00:04:49,198 --> 00:04:52,202 The hottest band in the world! 43 00:04:52,202 --> 00:04:53,828 Kiss! 44 00:05:00,710 --> 00:05:02,754 Who is it? 45 00:05:02,796 --> 00:05:05,298 Shit, man! It's Jam's mom. 46 00:05:05,340 --> 00:05:07,508 What? It's my mom? 47 00:05:07,550 --> 00:05:08,760 Cover this shit up. 48 00:05:08,802 --> 00:05:10,595 Spray something. It smells like dope. 49 00:05:10,637 --> 00:05:13,515 Just like Jam's mom to ruin the fucking party. 50 00:05:13,556 --> 00:05:15,767 It smells in here, man. 51 00:05:20,021 --> 00:05:21,106 Jeremiah! 52 00:05:21,147 --> 00:05:23,191 You get out here this instant! 53 00:05:24,318 --> 00:05:25,444 Hi, Mom. 54 00:05:25,486 --> 00:05:27,238 Now! 55 00:05:28,239 --> 00:05:29,364 What's up? 56 00:05:29,405 --> 00:05:31,574 The devil's body count, that's what's up. 57 00:05:31,616 --> 00:05:34,328 Don't you know what "KlSS" stands for? 58 00:05:34,370 --> 00:05:36,997 Knights In Satan's Service. 59 00:05:37,081 --> 00:05:38,749 -Where is Karen Carpenter? -How would I know? 60 00:05:38,791 --> 00:05:42,378 -You have Donny and Marie, too? -Why would l? 61 00:05:44,588 --> 00:05:47,383 I had a nightmare that bullshit like this might happen. 62 00:05:47,424 --> 00:05:49,594 If he misses Peter Criss' drum solo... 63 00:05:49,636 --> 00:05:51,762 he won't be able to continue with his life. 64 00:05:51,804 --> 00:05:53,806 Lex, quit jinxing us, man. 65 00:05:54,014 --> 00:05:56,100 Nobody's missing that concert tomorrow night. 66 00:06:37,225 --> 00:06:40,521 They're larger-than-life space-age comic-book heroes... 67 00:06:40,521 --> 00:06:43,524 the most sensational phenomenon of the past decade. 68 00:06:43,566 --> 00:06:44,691 Their fans are fanatical. 69 00:06:44,733 --> 00:06:48,279 Each fan has a favorite, each one a fantasy. 70 00:06:54,243 --> 00:06:56,704 The rock-and-roll band Kiss is in town. 71 00:06:56,746 --> 00:07:00,333 For some people, that spells trouble with a capital "T". 72 00:07:16,266 --> 00:07:20,102 I shall resign the presidency effective at noon tomorrow. 73 00:07:20,144 --> 00:07:22,064 Kiss is hotter than hell! 74 00:07:22,105 --> 00:07:24,024 The protesters are mainly religious groups. 75 00:07:24,024 --> 00:07:26,068 Satan worship and drugs among our kids. 76 00:07:26,109 --> 00:07:28,527 Each 12 1/2-inch figure sold separately. 77 00:08:24,544 --> 00:08:25,670 -Jam. -Hawk. 78 00:08:25,711 --> 00:08:29,133 Listen. We're in a bit of a quandary right now. 79 00:08:29,174 --> 00:08:32,010 -They're fucking gone! -What's gone? 80 00:08:32,052 --> 00:08:34,971 What do you think? The Kiss tickets! 81 00:08:35,012 --> 00:08:36,098 Gone? 82 00:08:36,140 --> 00:08:39,393 -Please tell me you have them. -Why would I have them? 83 00:08:39,434 --> 00:08:40,602 I don't know, man. 84 00:08:40,644 --> 00:08:43,062 Check whatever you were wearing last night. 85 00:08:45,315 --> 00:08:46,608 Now, man! 86 00:08:54,074 --> 00:08:55,492 I got 'em. 87 00:08:55,576 --> 00:08:57,286 He's got 'em. 88 00:08:57,327 --> 00:08:59,580 I must have taken Trip's jacket by mistake. 89 00:08:59,621 --> 00:09:01,291 I'm really sorry about that. 90 00:09:01,332 --> 00:09:03,168 Don't be such a wuss, Jam. 91 00:09:03,209 --> 00:09:04,793 Are you grounded? 92 00:09:05,002 --> 00:09:09,174 Yeah, but has that ever stopped me before? 93 00:09:09,215 --> 00:09:11,134 See you guys at school. 94 00:09:12,093 --> 00:09:14,095 Poor Jam, man. 95 00:09:14,137 --> 00:09:16,096 Imagine having to stash your Kiss records... 96 00:09:16,138 --> 00:09:18,433 in Carly Simon album covers. 97 00:09:18,474 --> 00:09:20,226 How shitty is that? 98 00:09:20,268 --> 00:09:21,436 No question. 99 00:09:21,477 --> 00:09:24,272 Mrs. Bruce is a psycho bitch from hell. 100 00:09:24,314 --> 00:09:25,941 You're one to talk, Lex. 101 00:09:25,983 --> 00:09:27,483 Your mom's a fuckin' dyke. 102 00:09:27,525 --> 00:09:29,611 Just because she's a female gynecologist... 103 00:09:29,694 --> 00:09:31,154 that doesn't mean she's a lesbian. 104 00:09:31,195 --> 00:09:32,697 Even if she was... 105 00:09:32,739 --> 00:09:35,576 at least my mom didn't give birth to me while on LSD. 106 00:09:35,618 --> 00:09:37,118 Shrooms! 107 00:09:37,160 --> 00:09:39,245 Will you guys quit the mom bashing? 108 00:09:39,287 --> 00:09:42,750 Lex's mom is cool because she lets us spend the night... 109 00:09:43,000 --> 00:09:44,543 and if it wasn't for your mom, Trip... 110 00:09:44,585 --> 00:09:47,588 we wouldn't have smoked that fine Panama Red last night. 111 00:09:47,630 --> 00:09:50,423 So leave the women who gave you life out of it. 112 00:09:50,466 --> 00:09:51,717 They're both cool. 113 00:09:51,759 --> 00:09:53,052 Let's go. 114 00:09:57,598 --> 00:09:59,683 -Trip, you asshole! -What? 115 00:09:59,725 --> 00:10:02,519 You spilled the bong water all over the bed. 116 00:10:02,561 --> 00:10:04,104 Stupid... 117 00:10:05,272 --> 00:10:06,398 Come on. 118 00:10:09,235 --> 00:10:11,570 Jeremiah, it's time to go. Get-- 119 00:10:12,780 --> 00:10:14,531 What are you doing? 120 00:10:14,573 --> 00:10:17,160 Just, uh, whew! 121 00:10:17,160 --> 00:10:18,620 Getting a little sunshine. 122 00:10:18,703 --> 00:10:21,413 You're gonna be late if you don't change soon. 123 00:10:21,455 --> 00:10:23,792 Change? 124 00:10:23,833 --> 00:10:26,294 What's wrong with the clothes I wore last night? 125 00:10:26,336 --> 00:10:28,797 It's dirty laundry, for one thing. 126 00:10:28,838 --> 00:10:32,049 And you still haven't tried on the clothes I bought you. 127 00:10:32,092 --> 00:10:35,679 You're skating on thin ice, so I wouldn't push my luck. 128 00:10:35,720 --> 00:10:37,222 Get out of those rags. 129 00:10:37,263 --> 00:10:38,598 Mom, it's-- 130 00:10:38,640 --> 00:10:40,726 And, besides, those jeans are so tight... 131 00:10:40,768 --> 00:10:43,061 I can see your penis. 132 00:10:43,144 --> 00:10:44,270 Excuse me. 133 00:10:45,313 --> 00:10:47,857 This jacket, it stinks of B.O. 134 00:10:48,066 --> 00:10:51,112 It's enough to make a person sick. 135 00:10:51,153 --> 00:10:52,321 Now, remember. 136 00:10:52,363 --> 00:10:53,738 I have my church meeting... 137 00:10:53,780 --> 00:10:56,741 so you'll be on the honor system tonight. 138 00:10:56,783 --> 00:10:59,578 I'll be home a little after one. 139 00:10:59,620 --> 00:11:01,080 And if you've been partying... 140 00:11:01,122 --> 00:11:03,706 or playing that satanic Kiss music... 141 00:11:06,252 --> 00:11:08,754 need I remind you of the consequences? 142 00:11:11,132 --> 00:11:13,551 Grounded for the rest of the year? 143 00:11:13,592 --> 00:11:15,719 You are a smart boy. 144 00:11:15,761 --> 00:11:19,056 Put these on before they go out of style. 145 00:11:19,098 --> 00:11:21,016 Come on, take it. 146 00:11:36,782 --> 00:11:40,579 Man, school. What a fuckin' waste of time. 147 00:11:40,620 --> 00:11:43,498 I wish someone would tell these chicks that disco's dead! 148 00:11:43,540 --> 00:11:46,584 Don't stare too long, boys. You'll go blind. 149 00:11:46,625 --> 00:11:47,794 Yeah, right. 150 00:11:49,337 --> 00:11:53,425 Stellas. I hate Stellas almost as much as I hate dogs. 151 00:11:53,466 --> 00:11:56,095 Yeah, man. Same species when you think about it. 152 00:12:03,226 --> 00:12:06,147 Shit, man. That geek looks like Jam. 153 00:12:08,315 --> 00:12:10,317 That geek is Jam. 154 00:12:10,358 --> 00:12:12,069 Hey, dork! 155 00:12:17,491 --> 00:12:19,284 Who did your wardrobe? 156 00:12:19,326 --> 00:12:22,330 Tad the Preppie Sailboat Captain? 157 00:12:22,371 --> 00:12:25,458 My mom had me over a barrel, all right? 158 00:12:25,499 --> 00:12:28,336 After last night, I had to let her dress me. 159 00:12:28,377 --> 00:12:29,504 It's a give-and-take relationship. 160 00:12:29,546 --> 00:12:31,297 She gives you shit, and you take it. 161 00:12:31,339 --> 00:12:33,132 Hey, Jam, hand over the tickets. 162 00:12:33,174 --> 00:12:35,009 Tickets? 163 00:12:35,051 --> 00:12:36,510 What? 164 00:12:36,552 --> 00:12:39,723 There's a, uh... Iittle, little problem. 165 00:12:39,765 --> 00:12:42,224 They're still at my house in Trip's jacket. 166 00:12:42,266 --> 00:12:43,768 What are you talking about? 167 00:12:43,809 --> 00:12:46,188 She was standing over me when I was changing. 168 00:12:46,229 --> 00:12:47,731 You are so pathetic. 169 00:12:47,773 --> 00:12:50,108 That's some sick shit right there, man. 170 00:12:50,150 --> 00:12:52,485 Does she comb your ass hair for you, too? 171 00:12:52,526 --> 00:12:54,237 If she even smells those tickets... 172 00:12:54,279 --> 00:12:55,530 she'll destroy 'em... 173 00:12:55,530 --> 00:12:58,283 and we miss Kiss for the third year in a row. 174 00:12:58,283 --> 00:13:00,118 It's gonna be OK. Don't worry. 175 00:13:00,118 --> 00:13:02,287 They're at my house. They're perfectly safe. 176 00:13:02,287 --> 00:13:04,039 We'll go there after school and pick them up. 177 00:13:04,081 --> 00:13:06,291 My mom's not even gonna be there. 178 00:13:06,375 --> 00:13:10,380 Hours from now we're actually gonna be seeing Kiss. 179 00:13:10,421 --> 00:13:12,423 We'll just double-time it to your house... 180 00:13:12,465 --> 00:13:13,590 grab the tickets... 181 00:13:13,632 --> 00:13:15,467 then head to the train station... 182 00:13:15,509 --> 00:13:20,056 for the three forty-five to Detroit Rock City! 183 00:13:20,098 --> 00:13:21,516 God! 184 00:13:21,516 --> 00:13:24,434 Well, as they say in the tampon biz... 185 00:13:24,476 --> 00:13:26,228 see you next period. 186 00:13:31,526 --> 00:13:32,652 Jerk. 187 00:13:55,092 --> 00:13:57,051 I'm sorry. 188 00:13:57,051 --> 00:13:58,761 It's not a problem. 189 00:13:58,803 --> 00:14:00,431 Thanks. 190 00:14:00,472 --> 00:14:02,599 Fine. 191 00:14:10,607 --> 00:14:12,067 Hey, Beth. 192 00:14:14,361 --> 00:14:15,487 I'm so sorry. 193 00:14:15,529 --> 00:14:18,699 Mr. Bruce, Miss Bumsteen, is there a problem? 194 00:14:18,741 --> 00:14:20,993 Uh, no, there... 195 00:14:21,034 --> 00:14:23,078 there's no problem. 196 00:14:23,162 --> 00:14:24,580 I'm so sorry. 197 00:14:24,621 --> 00:14:26,040 Don't worry about it. 198 00:14:34,007 --> 00:14:36,426 I wanted to tell you something. 199 00:14:36,426 --> 00:14:38,052 What? 200 00:14:38,094 --> 00:14:43,766 I know we don't know each other that well or anything, but... 201 00:14:43,975 --> 00:14:45,351 But what? 202 00:14:48,396 --> 00:14:53,109 Today is gonna be the last time I can-- 203 00:14:53,151 --> 00:14:55,612 I'm mov-- 204 00:14:55,653 --> 00:14:57,489 Jeremiah Bruce, please come to the office. 205 00:14:57,530 --> 00:15:00,367 Jeremiah Bruce, come to the office immediately. 206 00:15:00,409 --> 00:15:02,160 Give me that microphone! 207 00:15:02,202 --> 00:15:04,579 Jeremiah Bruce! This is your mother! 208 00:15:04,579 --> 00:15:08,209 You are in big trouble, young man. 209 00:15:08,250 --> 00:15:11,128 What I found in the pocket of that stinky jacket of yours... 210 00:15:11,170 --> 00:15:13,129 has me more than livid. 211 00:15:13,129 --> 00:15:16,091 You get your little fanny out of that seat... 212 00:15:16,133 --> 00:15:19,094 and you meet me in the front office. 213 00:15:19,136 --> 00:15:20,638 How dare you do this! 214 00:15:20,679 --> 00:15:23,307 How dare you humiliate me after I work so hard for you! 215 00:15:23,349 --> 00:15:25,434 You take my hard-earned money... 216 00:15:25,476 --> 00:15:29,104 and you and your idiot friends spend it... 217 00:15:29,146 --> 00:15:31,065 on Kiss tickets?! 218 00:15:57,425 --> 00:15:58,802 Sit! 219 00:16:01,179 --> 00:16:02,514 You don't understand. 220 00:16:02,514 --> 00:16:04,307 Oh, I understand perfectly. 221 00:16:04,349 --> 00:16:07,018 And so will Father Philip McNulty. 222 00:16:07,060 --> 00:16:10,647 You're sending me to boarding school? 223 00:16:10,689 --> 00:16:12,148 What else can I do? 224 00:16:12,190 --> 00:16:15,611 Records, magazines, comic books, that's one thing... 225 00:16:15,653 --> 00:16:17,988 but tickets. 226 00:16:18,113 --> 00:16:20,407 Do you realize what this means? 227 00:16:20,448 --> 00:16:23,369 You are no longer content merely hearing their awful music... 228 00:16:23,369 --> 00:16:25,371 and looking at photos of their horrific faces. 229 00:16:25,371 --> 00:16:27,372 Now you want to see the devil in the flesh! 230 00:16:27,414 --> 00:16:30,418 You want to reach out and touch pure evil. 231 00:16:30,459 --> 00:16:32,294 And in Detroit, no less. 232 00:17:13,462 --> 00:17:16,131 It's been a long time coming... 233 00:17:16,173 --> 00:17:20,261 but you are finally going to get the discipline you deserve. 234 00:17:20,303 --> 00:17:21,386 But, Mom-- 235 00:17:21,428 --> 00:17:22,596 Shut up! 236 00:17:35,942 --> 00:17:37,069 I knew it. 237 00:17:37,111 --> 00:17:39,113 We're completely fucked. 238 00:17:39,113 --> 00:17:41,949 For once, Lex is right. 239 00:17:41,949 --> 00:17:43,575 Can't get any worse from here. 240 00:17:43,617 --> 00:17:47,121 I hope you rodents have hall passes. 241 00:17:47,163 --> 00:17:48,998 Fuck, it's Elvis! 242 00:17:50,208 --> 00:17:55,171 Could that be three detentions I smell? 243 00:17:55,213 --> 00:17:58,424 Second floor, girls bathroom. He'll never find us there. 244 00:18:07,308 --> 00:18:10,103 Fuck! Son of a bitch, man! 245 00:18:10,145 --> 00:18:11,438 Take it easy, man. 246 00:18:11,480 --> 00:18:12,940 This is the girls crapper, remember? 247 00:18:12,981 --> 00:18:14,191 Wake up, Lex! 248 00:18:14,233 --> 00:18:17,944 We just watched Jam's mom torch ourfucking Kiss tickets! 249 00:18:17,985 --> 00:18:19,988 Not REO Speedwagon... 250 00:18:20,030 --> 00:18:22,616 not Journey, not the Bay City Rollers. 251 00:18:22,658 --> 00:18:24,159 Kiss, man! 252 00:18:24,201 --> 00:18:27,037 If you know a better reason to trash a girls bathroom... 253 00:18:27,079 --> 00:18:29,081 I'd sure like to hear it. 254 00:18:29,790 --> 00:18:31,375 What the fuck are you doing? 255 00:18:31,416 --> 00:18:33,961 -This is school. -So what? 256 00:18:38,048 --> 00:18:39,508 I think we're clear, dudes. 257 00:18:42,386 --> 00:18:44,055 Let's go. 258 00:18:46,516 --> 00:18:48,767 -Shit. Girls, girls. -Shit. 259 00:19:14,711 --> 00:19:16,547 Sharon Van Hoft. 260 00:19:16,588 --> 00:19:19,633 I've had the hots for her since second grade. 261 00:19:27,474 --> 00:19:30,644 Man, I've never heard a girl blow ass before. 262 00:19:43,615 --> 00:19:45,075 Get the fuck out! 263 00:19:45,075 --> 00:19:46,577 Sorry. 264 00:20:03,302 --> 00:20:06,514 God forbid someday you have a son like you. 265 00:20:06,556 --> 00:20:08,558 A boy who lies through his teeth... 266 00:20:08,600 --> 00:20:10,393 buys demonic records... 267 00:20:10,435 --> 00:20:12,353 and smokes the dope. 268 00:20:46,305 --> 00:20:47,764 Sorry. Sorry. 269 00:20:55,147 --> 00:20:57,108 Anyone upfor an enema? 270 00:20:58,359 --> 00:20:59,610 Shit, man. 271 00:20:59,652 --> 00:21:02,321 Maybe some music will cheer us up. 272 00:21:05,492 --> 00:21:08,536 Simple Simon on the rock of Detroit... 273 00:21:08,577 --> 00:21:10,746 home of the biggest Kiss giveaway... 274 00:21:10,788 --> 00:21:12,581 in the history of the universe! 275 00:21:12,623 --> 00:21:14,459 I got four front-row tickets... 276 00:21:14,501 --> 00:21:16,586 along with four backstage passes... 277 00:21:16,628 --> 00:21:19,713 to the concert tonight at Cobo Hall... 278 00:21:19,755 --> 00:21:23,510 and I'm giving 'em to the 106th caller... 279 00:21:23,552 --> 00:21:26,763 who can tell me the real names of each Kiss band member. 280 00:21:26,805 --> 00:21:28,098 Oh, shit. 281 00:21:33,353 --> 00:21:35,146 This is horse shit. 282 00:21:35,188 --> 00:21:37,315 It's too bad we're stuck in this prison. 283 00:21:40,361 --> 00:21:41,486 I got it. 284 00:21:45,240 --> 00:21:48,369 Mr. Verudi, get back to your bench. 285 00:21:48,411 --> 00:21:51,538 I gotta take a leak like you would not believe. 286 00:21:51,580 --> 00:21:54,082 Put a clothespin on it till the end of class. 287 00:21:54,124 --> 00:21:55,251 But, Mr. J... 288 00:21:55,293 --> 00:21:58,129 ever since my doctor put me on these salt pills-- 289 00:21:58,170 --> 00:21:59,755 Salt pills? 290 00:21:59,797 --> 00:22:02,008 Don't insult my intelligence. 291 00:22:02,048 --> 00:22:06,554 Oh, man, I'm taking a leak in my pants. 292 00:22:12,561 --> 00:22:14,186 Get the hell out of here. 293 00:22:14,228 --> 00:22:15,646 You disgust me. 294 00:22:29,953 --> 00:22:33,457 I need to be connected to the WURP contest line. 295 00:22:33,498 --> 00:22:35,333 Now, lady, come on! 296 00:22:38,003 --> 00:22:40,005 Oh, yeah, man! 297 00:22:43,008 --> 00:22:44,259 I won! 298 00:22:44,301 --> 00:22:48,305 We! We won! 299 00:22:48,388 --> 00:22:50,974 We're going to Detroit! 300 00:22:57,272 --> 00:23:01,069 This is the greatest thing that ever happened to me in school. 301 00:23:01,110 --> 00:23:03,446 Not only are we on for Kiss in Detroit... 302 00:23:03,488 --> 00:23:07,240 but we're gonna be sitting front row, center, man. 303 00:23:07,282 --> 00:23:10,453 Guys, our band Mystery is a quartet, right? 304 00:23:10,495 --> 00:23:12,705 We can't go on the road without our drummer. 305 00:23:12,747 --> 00:23:15,374 Jam's mom said something about taking him to St. Bernard's. 306 00:23:15,416 --> 00:23:18,002 I say we bust him the hell out of there. 307 00:23:18,044 --> 00:23:20,630 St. Bernard's is in the next county. 308 00:23:20,671 --> 00:23:23,925 Your mom's car has a CB, radar detector... 309 00:23:23,966 --> 00:23:25,051 cruise control, check. 310 00:23:25,093 --> 00:23:27,638 We're not stealing my mom's car, OK? 311 00:23:27,679 --> 00:23:29,388 Damn right, we are, man. 312 00:23:29,430 --> 00:23:31,182 One ding on that Volvo... 313 00:23:31,224 --> 00:23:33,684 and I'm fucked when my mom gets back from Cincinnati. 314 00:23:33,726 --> 00:23:36,063 She won't even know we touched it. 315 00:23:36,105 --> 00:23:38,690 If one thing happens to the car, I'm blaming you. 316 00:23:38,732 --> 00:23:40,274 I'm gonna say you drugged me. 317 00:23:40,274 --> 00:23:41,609 I say we leave. 318 00:23:41,609 --> 00:23:43,403 Hold on. We're ditching school? 319 00:23:43,445 --> 00:23:45,197 About time if you ask me. 320 00:23:45,239 --> 00:23:47,324 I'm just going through the motions... 321 00:23:47,366 --> 00:23:49,326 till I'm old enough to drop out anyway. 322 00:23:49,368 --> 00:23:51,078 Shit. Guys, Elvis alert. 323 00:23:52,246 --> 00:23:54,998 I notice the trays match your outfits. 324 00:23:55,040 --> 00:23:56,750 Did you plan that? 325 00:23:59,671 --> 00:24:01,213 Excuse me, ladies. 326 00:24:02,047 --> 00:24:04,091 He stinks! 327 00:24:34,664 --> 00:24:36,291 I'm responsible for that! 328 00:25:12,995 --> 00:25:14,664 Pray hard, Jeremiah. 329 00:25:14,706 --> 00:25:16,707 God loves you. 330 00:25:16,915 --> 00:25:18,208 That he does. 331 00:25:18,250 --> 00:25:21,420 God bless you, Father McNulty. 332 00:25:29,678 --> 00:25:33,308 If you think that recklessness and disobedience... 333 00:25:33,350 --> 00:25:34,601 can get you expelled... 334 00:25:34,642 --> 00:25:36,061 think again. 335 00:25:36,102 --> 00:25:38,687 St. Bernard's may punish you... 336 00:25:38,729 --> 00:25:41,107 even for the slightest digression, but... 337 00:25:41,149 --> 00:25:44,277 it'll never cast you out, even for the largest. 338 00:25:44,319 --> 00:25:47,238 So, here you are, Jeremiah. 339 00:25:47,280 --> 00:25:49,366 Here to stay. 340 00:26:20,690 --> 00:26:23,526 Damn, man, come on. Let's go bust him out. 341 00:26:23,567 --> 00:26:26,153 No, man. We can't just waltz in there. 342 00:26:26,195 --> 00:26:28,114 We've gotta figure out a plan. 343 00:26:33,744 --> 00:26:35,704 The eagle's landed, you guys. 344 00:26:42,295 --> 00:26:46,007 You kids know where Philip McNutly's office is? 345 00:26:49,010 --> 00:26:50,345 You ordered a pizza? 346 00:26:50,387 --> 00:26:53,098 -What's the damage, young man? -Ten even. 347 00:27:00,105 --> 00:27:03,109 If he offers you a slice, you're not hungry. 348 00:27:05,318 --> 00:27:09,489 Ten dollars, and I'm donating your tip to the church. 349 00:27:09,531 --> 00:27:10,616 The Lord thanks you. 350 00:27:10,658 --> 00:27:13,160 Tell the big guy not to mention it. 351 00:27:13,202 --> 00:27:14,954 I am famished. 352 00:27:14,996 --> 00:27:18,331 Well, hope you brought a lunch for yourself. 353 00:27:18,373 --> 00:27:20,918 No, but I'm not hungry anyway. 354 00:27:20,960 --> 00:27:22,920 Oh, it finally speaks. 355 00:27:23,004 --> 00:27:25,172 There's one barrier we've broken through. 356 00:27:33,973 --> 00:27:38,436 Your coming here reminds me of the Prodigal Son. 357 00:27:38,477 --> 00:27:42,148 Once, there was a man, and he had two sons. 358 00:27:42,189 --> 00:27:45,319 They both grew up on the farm with him. 359 00:27:45,360 --> 00:27:48,029 One day-- 360 00:28:06,173 --> 00:28:10,010 That was a very stale mushroom. 361 00:28:10,052 --> 00:28:11,511 Well... 362 00:28:11,553 --> 00:28:13,055 where was l? 363 00:28:13,055 --> 00:28:15,557 Man, come on, this is such a lousy view. 364 00:28:15,557 --> 00:28:18,394 How are we supposed to know when he's lit? 365 00:28:18,436 --> 00:28:21,438 It usually takes ten minutes to half an hour. 366 00:28:21,480 --> 00:28:22,689 All depends, you know? 367 00:28:28,237 --> 00:28:29,530 He's lit. 368 00:28:36,079 --> 00:28:39,499 I've been telling that sermon for years. 369 00:28:39,540 --> 00:28:41,666 This is the first time I've realized... 370 00:28:41,708 --> 00:28:45,630 it's the work of some comedy mastermind. 371 00:28:45,671 --> 00:28:50,511 The Prodigal Son is a barrel of fuckin' monkeys. 372 00:28:50,552 --> 00:28:51,720 Wait, wait! 373 00:28:51,762 --> 00:28:53,721 You kids can't go in there. 374 00:28:53,763 --> 00:28:57,141 No, it's OK. We're old buds of Father McNulty's. 375 00:28:57,183 --> 00:28:58,559 How's it hangin', padre? 376 00:28:58,601 --> 00:29:02,231 I just heard you talking through my nose. 377 00:29:02,272 --> 00:29:06,067 Is it possible my nose has eardrums? 378 00:29:06,109 --> 00:29:07,653 Nosedrums. 379 00:29:08,779 --> 00:29:11,573 We're here to take our friend Jam... 380 00:29:11,615 --> 00:29:16,036 to the big satanic Kiss concert tonight if that's OK with you. 381 00:29:16,078 --> 00:29:17,913 Satan? Satan? 382 00:29:17,955 --> 00:29:19,081 Santa. 383 00:29:21,375 --> 00:29:23,962 They're the same letters. They're the same guy. 384 00:29:24,003 --> 00:29:26,672 It's the same friggin' guy. 385 00:29:26,713 --> 00:29:29,258 What the hell are you doing, Sister Gonorrhea? 386 00:29:29,299 --> 00:29:31,093 Waitin' for a bus? 387 00:29:56,286 --> 00:29:59,247 You'll still get rowdy with the girls and boys 388 00:29:59,289 --> 00:30:03,459 'Cause it's time for you to take a stand 389 00:30:03,501 --> 00:30:05,295 Yeah, whoo 390 00:30:05,336 --> 00:30:07,715 Shout it, shout it 391 00:30:07,756 --> 00:30:10,633 Shout it out loud 392 00:30:10,675 --> 00:30:12,510 You've got to have a party 393 00:30:12,552 --> 00:30:15,472 Shout it, shout it 394 00:30:15,514 --> 00:30:17,057 Shout it out loud 395 00:30:18,601 --> 00:30:20,185 Whoa, dudes, man. 396 00:30:20,268 --> 00:30:22,438 I just had the killerest vision, man. 397 00:30:22,479 --> 00:30:25,065 Imagine Mystery... 398 00:30:25,107 --> 00:30:27,985 opening up for Kiss, man. 399 00:30:27,985 --> 00:30:29,652 Oh, that'd be fucking it. 400 00:30:29,694 --> 00:30:33,115 Yeah, man. It could happen, man. 401 00:30:33,157 --> 00:30:37,328 You know, in '73, Kiss was opening for Blue Oyster Cult. 402 00:30:37,369 --> 00:30:39,664 One year later to the day, man... 403 00:30:39,706 --> 00:30:42,499 Blue Oyster Cult was opening for Kiss. 404 00:30:42,541 --> 00:30:44,043 We're not opening for anybody... 405 00:30:44,084 --> 00:30:46,670 until our lead singer gets over his stage fright. 406 00:30:46,712 --> 00:30:48,214 God, man. 407 00:30:48,214 --> 00:30:50,342 I don't have fucking stage fright, Lex. 408 00:30:50,383 --> 00:30:52,426 Then why'd you pass out on stage at Bing's party... 409 00:30:52,468 --> 00:30:53,719 before the first fucking song? 410 00:30:53,761 --> 00:30:56,306 That was one show, man. 411 00:30:56,348 --> 00:30:59,351 That was our only show, and you dropped like a dead deer on us. 412 00:30:59,351 --> 00:31:00,518 Shut up. 413 00:31:04,064 --> 00:31:05,690 I'm solid gold 414 00:31:05,732 --> 00:31:07,484 I got the goods 415 00:31:07,525 --> 00:31:11,237 They stare when I walk through the neighborhood 416 00:31:11,279 --> 00:31:13,281 I'm makin' it 417 00:31:13,323 --> 00:31:17,285 I got the chance, I'm takin' it 418 00:31:17,327 --> 00:31:18,995 No more, no more 419 00:31:18,995 --> 00:31:20,998 Fakin' it 420 00:31:21,082 --> 00:31:22,249 This time in life 421 00:31:22,291 --> 00:31:24,542 I'm takin' it 422 00:31:24,584 --> 00:31:26,419 Woo woo woo 423 00:31:26,461 --> 00:31:28,088 Makin' it 424 00:31:28,839 --> 00:31:30,675 Gimme this pizza. 425 00:31:31,676 --> 00:31:33,260 It's the last piece. 426 00:31:33,260 --> 00:31:35,261 It's mine, all right? 427 00:31:37,598 --> 00:31:40,643 Fuck, man. Only a car full of Stellas and Guidos... 428 00:31:40,685 --> 00:31:43,354 would ride your ass on a two-lane highway and honk. 429 00:31:43,396 --> 00:31:45,356 Oh, man. 430 00:31:45,398 --> 00:31:49,068 Listen, everyone here 431 00:31:49,110 --> 00:31:50,569 This coming year's gonna 432 00:31:50,611 --> 00:31:52,196 Be my year 433 00:31:52,238 --> 00:31:53,990 I'm as bad as they come 434 00:31:54,032 --> 00:31:55,659 Number two to no one 435 00:31:55,701 --> 00:31:57,535 I got looks, I got brains 436 00:31:57,576 --> 00:32:00,121 And I'm breaking these chains 437 00:32:00,162 --> 00:32:02,249 Throw that shit out before it stains the up-- 438 00:32:02,290 --> 00:32:04,960 Throw it out of the car, you asshole! 439 00:32:05,001 --> 00:32:06,378 Come on, man! 440 00:32:07,962 --> 00:32:09,713 I'm makin' it 441 00:32:13,927 --> 00:32:15,887 Oh, fuck, man. 442 00:32:15,929 --> 00:32:18,431 Kenny, you asshole, you just killed a bird. 443 00:32:18,431 --> 00:32:19,558 That's no bird. 444 00:32:19,599 --> 00:32:22,561 That's a hunk of fuckin' cheese, Kenny. 445 00:32:22,602 --> 00:32:24,438 A hunk of fuckin' cheese? 446 00:32:24,479 --> 00:32:27,066 We just pissed off the lncredible Hulk... 447 00:32:27,108 --> 00:32:30,110 his idiot half brother, and two circus clowns. 448 00:32:30,152 --> 00:32:32,404 I'm gonna fuckin' kill these bastards. 449 00:32:36,742 --> 00:32:38,578 Pull the fuckin' car over! 450 00:32:40,078 --> 00:32:41,580 I'm gonna fuckin'-- Pull over! 451 00:32:41,621 --> 00:32:42,747 No way, man. 452 00:32:42,956 --> 00:32:44,417 You're dead! 453 00:32:44,459 --> 00:32:46,085 Suck my cock! 454 00:32:46,127 --> 00:32:48,004 You should pull over and apologize. 455 00:32:48,045 --> 00:32:50,005 This motherfucker's dead! 456 00:32:53,593 --> 00:32:55,344 The paint! 457 00:32:56,596 --> 00:32:58,139 Fuck! 458 00:32:59,473 --> 00:33:00,601 Pull over! 459 00:33:15,072 --> 00:33:17,326 Out of the car. 460 00:33:17,367 --> 00:33:18,493 Fuck. 461 00:33:21,330 --> 00:33:23,456 Oh, shit! God-- 462 00:33:27,169 --> 00:33:30,172 Oh, God! Aah, shit! 463 00:33:31,506 --> 00:33:33,717 That's not funny, Kenny. 464 00:33:33,926 --> 00:33:35,052 Oh, God! 465 00:33:39,681 --> 00:33:41,976 Oh, that's not very nice, man. 466 00:33:42,018 --> 00:33:44,269 You are a complete asshole, Kenny. 467 00:33:49,107 --> 00:33:50,568 Not the fag music. 468 00:33:50,652 --> 00:33:52,362 Get out of the way. 469 00:33:52,403 --> 00:33:54,280 Cut it with the macho crap already. 470 00:33:55,530 --> 00:33:57,491 This is about pizza, man. 471 00:33:57,532 --> 00:34:00,662 Can we try and leave Kiss out of it? 472 00:34:00,703 --> 00:34:04,999 What, a bunch of guys who make bad music... 473 00:34:05,041 --> 00:34:06,375 dress like freaks... 474 00:34:06,416 --> 00:34:08,628 and wear more makeup than all my sisters combined? 475 00:34:08,670 --> 00:34:12,048 No. These assholes gotta be stopped. 476 00:34:14,509 --> 00:34:16,511 That's it. I'm leaving. 477 00:34:18,179 --> 00:34:19,305 Christine. 478 00:34:20,348 --> 00:34:22,308 Jesus. 479 00:34:23,142 --> 00:34:25,270 You googats in the head or something? 480 00:34:25,312 --> 00:34:27,271 We're on the side of the freakin' highway. 481 00:34:27,271 --> 00:34:28,398 Fuck her. 482 00:34:28,439 --> 00:34:32,194 Kool and the Gang, that's music. 483 00:34:32,236 --> 00:34:33,362 But this? 484 00:34:33,404 --> 00:34:35,114 This is crap. 485 00:34:35,155 --> 00:34:36,281 That's crap. 486 00:34:46,291 --> 00:34:47,418 All right, fag-mo. 487 00:34:47,459 --> 00:34:49,962 Have you learned your lesson yet, puke? 488 00:34:50,003 --> 00:34:51,505 Well... 489 00:34:51,588 --> 00:34:56,343 if the lesson is that you're a dick with ears... 490 00:34:56,385 --> 00:34:57,679 and a really bad haircut... 491 00:34:57,721 --> 00:35:00,431 I'd say yeah, I learned my lesson. 492 00:35:01,557 --> 00:35:04,476 -Break his fucking legs, Kenny. -Fuckin'-- 493 00:35:35,633 --> 00:35:38,596 Come on, we can talk about this, right? 494 00:35:38,637 --> 00:35:41,682 You know, maybe reason a little bit. 495 00:35:47,480 --> 00:35:50,191 When these guys wake up, they're gonna look for you. 496 00:35:50,232 --> 00:35:51,609 You best hope they don't find you... 497 00:35:51,650 --> 00:35:54,319 'cause if they do, they're gonna kick your asses. 498 00:35:54,360 --> 00:35:57,490 Oh, yeah, Stella. And we'll deserve it, too. 499 00:35:57,531 --> 00:35:59,575 But you know what I'm gonna do? 500 00:35:59,617 --> 00:36:02,453 I'm gonna make it really worth their while. 501 00:36:07,333 --> 00:36:08,459 Oh, God! 502 00:36:17,635 --> 00:36:19,678 Thanks for letting us use your makeup supply. 503 00:36:19,888 --> 00:36:22,265 You must have the entire Revlon factory in your purse... 504 00:36:22,307 --> 00:36:24,476 you greasy disco ball. 505 00:36:24,517 --> 00:36:25,935 Very funny. 506 00:36:25,976 --> 00:36:28,146 I hope you fuckin' choke to death and die... 507 00:36:28,188 --> 00:36:29,648 you loser-ass motherfuckers! 508 00:36:29,689 --> 00:36:30,982 Disco sucks! 509 00:36:31,024 --> 00:36:32,692 Fuck you! 510 00:36:32,901 --> 00:36:35,153 Fuck! Fuck! 511 00:36:36,613 --> 00:36:38,907 They put the fag makeup on you. 512 00:36:38,949 --> 00:36:40,367 They put the fag makeup on? 513 00:36:40,408 --> 00:36:42,369 The fuckin' fag makeup's on you. 514 00:36:44,537 --> 00:36:47,916 Oh, no. I got fag makeup on me. 515 00:37:00,720 --> 00:37:02,723 Hey, look. It's that girl. 516 00:37:02,932 --> 00:37:05,518 Man, that's no girl. That's a Stella. 517 00:37:05,559 --> 00:37:07,937 Yeah, well, Stella or no Stella... 518 00:37:07,979 --> 00:37:09,981 we should pull over and help her out. 519 00:37:10,022 --> 00:37:12,191 Fuckin' inbred oaf. 520 00:37:12,233 --> 00:37:15,277 Kenny. Fuck you. 521 00:37:15,319 --> 00:37:17,029 Fuckin' kick your ass. 522 00:37:17,071 --> 00:37:19,282 Man, what the hell is wrong with you? 523 00:37:19,324 --> 00:37:21,409 You got a thing for that thing? 524 00:37:21,450 --> 00:37:24,412 It's a teenage girl walking along the side of the highway. 525 00:37:24,412 --> 00:37:28,959 They make scary movies that start out like that. 526 00:37:29,001 --> 00:37:31,502 Hey, but they make porno movies... 527 00:37:31,544 --> 00:37:33,421 that start out like that, too, man. 528 00:37:53,608 --> 00:37:56,987 Oh, great. Just hitched a ride with a bunch of potheads. 529 00:37:56,987 --> 00:37:59,531 Look, I'm trying to hook up with some people... 530 00:37:59,573 --> 00:38:02,368 at this funky place in Detroit called Disco lnferno. 531 00:38:02,410 --> 00:38:04,411 You mind dropping me there? 532 00:38:04,453 --> 00:38:06,079 What's it worth to you? 533 00:38:06,121 --> 00:38:08,249 What the hell is that supposed to mean? 534 00:38:08,291 --> 00:38:10,710 It doesn't mean anything. Don't pay attention to him. 535 00:38:10,752 --> 00:38:13,004 It's more like Disco's lnfernal. 536 00:38:13,045 --> 00:38:14,671 Ooh, you hot baby, you. 537 00:38:14,880 --> 00:38:18,259 You know, your clothes may say disco... 538 00:38:18,301 --> 00:38:20,470 but your eyes say rock and roll. 539 00:38:22,180 --> 00:38:25,141 Well, your belt buckle may say rock and roll... 540 00:38:25,183 --> 00:38:29,270 but your breath says pepperoni, baby. 541 00:38:30,521 --> 00:38:32,565 Are you gonna, like, suck our dicks, or what? 542 00:38:32,607 --> 00:38:33,942 What? 543 00:38:33,984 --> 00:38:36,152 -That's so fuckin' rude, man. -Fuck you, Jam. 544 00:38:36,194 --> 00:38:39,322 Stop being a wussy sensitive guy just to impress her. 545 00:38:39,363 --> 00:38:41,909 She's obviously not gonna put out, man. 546 00:38:41,950 --> 00:38:44,328 She's a tease, man. 547 00:38:44,369 --> 00:38:47,705 A tease? What the hell did I do to tease you mongoloids? 548 00:38:47,914 --> 00:38:50,000 You got in the fuckin' car, didn't you? 549 00:38:50,042 --> 00:38:51,585 How calculating of me to lead you on like that... 550 00:38:51,627 --> 00:38:53,462 after you offered me a ride in the middle of nowhere. 551 00:38:53,504 --> 00:38:55,464 Whatever, Stella. 552 00:38:55,506 --> 00:38:57,632 My name's Christine. Not Stella. 553 00:38:57,673 --> 00:39:00,427 You don't have to be such pigs 'cause I prefer Donna Summer... 554 00:39:00,469 --> 00:39:05,015 or K.C. and the Sunshine Band or the Village People over Kiss. 555 00:39:05,057 --> 00:39:07,352 Fuckin' Village People. They're a fag band. 556 00:39:07,393 --> 00:39:08,644 They take it up the coast. 557 00:39:08,685 --> 00:39:11,396 All right, all right, guys. 558 00:39:11,438 --> 00:39:14,024 Thanks, but I can take care of myself, Germ. 559 00:39:15,568 --> 00:39:16,653 Whatever. 560 00:39:16,861 --> 00:39:19,488 OK, dope burnout, let's get one thing straight here. 561 00:39:19,530 --> 00:39:22,658 As far as I'm concerned, good tunes is good tunes. 562 00:39:22,867 --> 00:39:25,036 Disco or rock or polka or whatever have you... 563 00:39:25,078 --> 00:39:26,913 regardless of the category. 564 00:39:26,955 --> 00:39:29,290 Disco is just easier to dance to. 565 00:39:29,332 --> 00:39:32,669 You call that Denny Terio, John Travolta shit dancing? 566 00:39:32,877 --> 00:39:35,922 You know something? Disco's so fucking big now... 567 00:39:35,964 --> 00:39:39,092 I wouldn't be surprised if Kiss did a disco song someday. 568 00:39:39,133 --> 00:39:41,261 If it's one thing Kiss will never do... 569 00:39:41,302 --> 00:39:42,679 it's a bullshit disco song. 570 00:39:42,679 --> 00:39:44,222 No shit, man. 571 00:39:44,264 --> 00:39:48,352 Yeah. Disco blows dogs for quarters, man. 572 00:39:48,394 --> 00:39:49,687 That's an intelligently biting remark... 573 00:39:49,895 --> 00:39:51,187 wrought with wit and irony. 574 00:39:51,229 --> 00:39:52,689 If you don't like that one... 575 00:39:52,897 --> 00:39:54,232 maybe you'll think it's really funny... 576 00:39:54,232 --> 00:39:57,069 when we kick your fuckin' ass out of the car. 577 00:39:57,069 --> 00:39:59,196 Why don't you put your money where your mouth is? 578 00:39:59,238 --> 00:40:01,240 Why don't you lick my hairy crack? 579 00:40:01,282 --> 00:40:04,910 Why don't you bend over? You're looking right at it. 580 00:40:07,204 --> 00:40:10,207 That last remark fell about thirty yards away... 581 00:40:10,249 --> 00:40:13,002 from making any sense whatsoever. 582 00:40:13,043 --> 00:40:15,212 You're right. 583 00:40:15,254 --> 00:40:17,047 Bend over, you're looking right at it? 584 00:40:17,089 --> 00:40:19,383 What the hell is that supposed to mean anyway? 585 00:40:21,553 --> 00:40:23,637 Give me a hit off that "J," will ya? 586 00:40:23,679 --> 00:40:25,389 That's some kick-ass shit. 587 00:41:18,985 --> 00:41:20,613 Move out of my way! 588 00:41:20,654 --> 00:41:24,241 Lex, thank you for letting us borrow your mom's car, man. 589 00:41:24,283 --> 00:41:26,660 Man, that weed knocked her straight on her ass. 590 00:41:26,702 --> 00:41:28,996 She's sleeping like a baby Stella. 591 00:41:29,038 --> 00:41:31,415 Man, let's lift up her skirt. 592 00:41:31,457 --> 00:41:33,459 -There it is! -What? 593 00:41:33,501 --> 00:41:37,047 Holy fuck! We made it. Oh, my God. 594 00:41:40,466 --> 00:41:42,343 Oh, my God! Thank you! 595 00:41:47,140 --> 00:41:48,266 Man. 596 00:41:50,976 --> 00:41:54,105 I'm going into swarm-o mode. 597 00:41:54,147 --> 00:41:55,315 Oh, shit! 598 00:42:02,239 --> 00:42:04,449 I'm the King of the Nighttime World! 599 00:42:06,284 --> 00:42:08,036 This is better than the first time... 600 00:42:08,078 --> 00:42:10,414 I got to finger a chick, man. 601 00:42:12,666 --> 00:42:14,000 It's happening, man! 602 00:42:14,042 --> 00:42:15,126 WURP! 603 00:42:15,168 --> 00:42:16,962 This is so lucky. 604 00:42:17,003 --> 00:42:19,090 We got two hours to spare! 605 00:42:19,131 --> 00:42:22,259 -Check out that parking space. -Get in there! 606 00:42:22,300 --> 00:42:25,512 Ample time to go to the station and grab our tickets. 607 00:42:25,554 --> 00:42:28,182 God is smiling down upon us tonight. 608 00:42:28,224 --> 00:42:32,019 That's weird. I figured he'd be pissed as hell at me. 609 00:42:37,567 --> 00:42:39,485 Fuck, yeah! 610 00:42:39,527 --> 00:42:40,903 Oh, baby! 611 00:42:44,073 --> 00:42:46,325 This is so awesome, man. 612 00:42:46,367 --> 00:42:48,160 No way, man! 613 00:42:48,202 --> 00:42:49,954 I can't wait! 614 00:42:49,996 --> 00:42:51,582 We're going to Kiss 615 00:42:57,003 --> 00:42:58,379 Let's get out of here, man. 616 00:42:59,214 --> 00:43:01,967 -Simple Simon? -The one and only. 617 00:43:03,552 --> 00:43:05,178 You kids have to hurry this up. 618 00:43:05,220 --> 00:43:07,513 I'm due at Cobo Hall in a half hourfor the warmup. 619 00:43:07,556 --> 00:43:08,932 We're right behind you, Simon. 620 00:43:08,974 --> 00:43:12,311 We want to thank you in advance for those burly-ass ticks. 621 00:43:12,352 --> 00:43:14,104 Your name isn't Trip, is it? 622 00:43:14,146 --> 00:43:16,065 Oh, no. My name's Trip. 623 00:43:16,107 --> 00:43:18,150 Remember? We were talking on the phone? 624 00:43:20,110 --> 00:43:21,528 Go, caller. 625 00:43:21,570 --> 00:43:24,324 Eugene Klein, Stanley Eisen... 626 00:43:24,365 --> 00:43:27,409 Peter Crisscoula, and Paul Frehley. 627 00:43:27,451 --> 00:43:29,369 You just got yourself four tickets... 628 00:43:29,411 --> 00:43:31,288 and four backstage passes... 629 00:43:33,207 --> 00:43:35,501 -...at Cobo Hall tonight! -We won! 630 00:43:35,501 --> 00:43:38,587 Stay on the line so we can get yourfull name... 631 00:43:38,628 --> 00:43:41,257 Trip? You didn't hang up on me, did you, Tri-- 632 00:43:41,299 --> 00:43:43,343 What kind of total moron... 633 00:43:43,384 --> 00:43:46,054 would hang up after winning Kiss tickets? 634 00:43:46,095 --> 00:43:49,140 Well, there you have it. We had no choice. 635 00:43:49,182 --> 00:43:50,600 We gave the tickets to the next caller. 636 00:43:50,641 --> 00:43:52,185 I'm sorry. 637 00:44:02,320 --> 00:44:03,946 Relax! 638 00:44:03,988 --> 00:44:05,239 Get off of him! 639 00:44:18,712 --> 00:44:19,838 This noise machine... 640 00:44:19,880 --> 00:44:23,133 is more than just a quartet of lousy musicians. 641 00:44:23,175 --> 00:44:26,553 There's a woman who abuses her privilege of motherhood. 642 00:44:26,553 --> 00:44:29,431 -What is Kiss backwards? -Ssik! 643 00:44:31,559 --> 00:44:32,684 Oh, shit! 644 00:44:32,726 --> 00:44:34,645 Guys, where's the Volvo? 645 00:44:34,645 --> 00:44:37,815 It was fucking stolen, man. 646 00:44:37,856 --> 00:44:39,859 Christine stole it. Sleep, my ass. 647 00:44:39,901 --> 00:44:41,861 The Stella booted with your mom's wheels. 648 00:44:41,861 --> 00:44:44,404 Son of a bitch, man! How can this happen? 649 00:44:44,446 --> 00:44:45,864 Why are you laughing? 650 00:44:45,906 --> 00:44:47,575 I'm starting to get real mad. 651 00:44:47,617 --> 00:44:49,035 Jam, you ass! 652 00:44:49,077 --> 00:44:51,704 Why'd you talk us into picking up this bitch? 653 00:44:51,746 --> 00:44:54,540 I'm sorry, man. I was trying to be nice. 654 00:44:54,581 --> 00:44:55,750 I'm sick of your nice shit! 655 00:44:55,750 --> 00:44:58,211 Drummers are supposed to have some fucking balls. 656 00:44:58,253 --> 00:45:00,755 Fuck you, man. I was being conscientious. 657 00:45:00,797 --> 00:45:03,424 I didn't think she was going to steal his mom's car. 658 00:45:03,466 --> 00:45:06,177 Jam, just shut your faggotty-ass mouth, OK? 659 00:45:06,219 --> 00:45:07,637 You're pissing me off. 660 00:45:07,679 --> 00:45:09,639 Now, we came all this way... 661 00:45:09,681 --> 00:45:11,724 we got an hour and forty-five minutes... 662 00:45:11,766 --> 00:45:14,770 and we got absolutely nothing. 663 00:45:14,812 --> 00:45:18,815 So help me, God, we are going to that concert. 664 00:45:18,857 --> 00:45:22,027 We must get the cops in on this Volvo situation. 665 00:45:22,069 --> 00:45:24,572 Lex, this is Detroit. 666 00:45:24,613 --> 00:45:27,949 You think the cops will waste city dollars on a Swedish car? 667 00:45:28,950 --> 00:45:29,910 You're right. 668 00:45:29,952 --> 00:45:31,912 My mom's got insurance. 669 00:45:31,954 --> 00:45:33,539 Why am I freaking out? 670 00:45:33,622 --> 00:45:35,541 It's cool. She's gonna try to ground me for a year. 671 00:45:35,583 --> 00:45:36,666 I don't give a shit, man. 672 00:45:36,708 --> 00:45:38,127 Exactly. Cool, bro. 673 00:45:38,168 --> 00:45:40,963 Oh, shit! Man, I'm in big trouble! 674 00:45:40,963 --> 00:45:43,632 I'm in big fucking trouble! The car's gone, man! 675 00:45:43,674 --> 00:45:45,175 Shut the fuck up, man! 676 00:45:45,217 --> 00:45:46,928 We're trying to think! 677 00:45:46,970 --> 00:45:48,721 Wait a second, man. 678 00:45:48,762 --> 00:45:50,806 I know how we can get the fucking tickets, man. 679 00:45:50,889 --> 00:45:53,934 We beat the fucking shit out of four little kids. 680 00:45:53,977 --> 00:45:55,979 Like, take their fuckin' tickets. 681 00:45:56,021 --> 00:45:58,480 Brilliance, Trip. Sheer fuckin' brilliance. 682 00:45:58,522 --> 00:46:00,608 Why don't you give Albert Einstein here... 683 00:46:00,649 --> 00:46:03,528 the fuckin' Nobel Prize?! 684 00:46:04,571 --> 00:46:07,949 Look, I think I can barter with a scalper. 685 00:46:07,991 --> 00:46:10,660 If you guys can think of a better plan, go for it. 686 00:46:10,702 --> 00:46:13,496 For the next hour and a half, it's every dude for himself. 687 00:46:13,496 --> 00:46:16,916 We'll reconvene at that intersection at 8:45. 688 00:46:16,958 --> 00:46:19,670 I'll see you guys later. Good luck. 689 00:46:19,670 --> 00:46:21,713 I don't know what the fuck we're doing. 690 00:46:24,007 --> 00:46:26,843 Look around you tonight, mothers. 691 00:46:26,843 --> 00:46:30,097 Look at all the young faces. 692 00:46:30,139 --> 00:46:32,974 Oh, they smile and they laugh... 693 00:46:33,016 --> 00:46:35,518 but their eyes have lost all hope. 694 00:46:35,561 --> 00:46:37,605 This satanic group Kiss... 695 00:46:37,646 --> 00:46:40,524 has stolen their souls! 696 00:46:41,233 --> 00:46:42,525 We-- 697 00:46:44,028 --> 00:46:46,489 Shit. 698 00:46:52,995 --> 00:46:55,748 I do not know how you got here tonight... 699 00:46:55,790 --> 00:46:57,625 and I do not want to know. 700 00:46:57,666 --> 00:46:59,210 All I know is... 701 00:46:59,418 --> 00:47:02,880 you are going to pay dearly for this one, young man. 702 00:47:24,568 --> 00:47:25,737 Oh, my God. 703 00:47:25,737 --> 00:47:27,739 The mass, Father-- so inspirational. 704 00:47:27,739 --> 00:47:28,865 Father, thank you. 705 00:47:28,907 --> 00:47:30,033 Come again next week. 706 00:47:30,075 --> 00:47:31,159 Father. 707 00:47:31,201 --> 00:47:32,911 It's Jeremiah. 708 00:47:32,953 --> 00:47:34,539 I'm desperate. 709 00:47:34,580 --> 00:47:36,748 My son was about to defy God... 710 00:47:36,790 --> 00:47:38,875 by going to that blasphemous Kiss concert. 711 00:47:38,917 --> 00:47:41,920 In that case, come right in. 712 00:47:41,920 --> 00:47:44,841 He and his mom just went into that church. 713 00:47:44,882 --> 00:47:47,092 Can I go and say good-bye to him? 714 00:47:47,134 --> 00:47:51,430 Beth, I am not gonna let you wander the streets after dark. 715 00:47:51,472 --> 00:47:55,143 I'm not going to wander. I'm just going over there. 716 00:47:55,184 --> 00:47:58,103 Fine. As long as we know where you are. 717 00:47:58,103 --> 00:47:59,230 Thank you. 718 00:47:59,438 --> 00:48:02,441 Don't be too long. We need to get back on the road. 719 00:48:02,483 --> 00:48:04,944 -Stuart. -Just relax. 720 00:48:04,944 --> 00:48:09,031 She's probably got a crush on the kid or something. 721 00:48:16,498 --> 00:48:18,000 Hey, chief, need a ticket? 722 00:48:18,083 --> 00:48:21,752 Second row, center, but it's seventy-five clams. 723 00:48:21,794 --> 00:48:24,590 Aw, man, this is all I got. Look. 724 00:48:25,841 --> 00:48:27,718 Scare up the extra gravy. 725 00:48:27,759 --> 00:48:28,927 Brother, take it easy. 726 00:48:28,969 --> 00:48:32,431 Where am I supposed to find that kind of money in an hour? 727 00:48:34,141 --> 00:48:37,102 Well, um... check it out over there. 728 00:48:37,144 --> 00:48:38,478 There's a contest going on. 729 00:48:38,520 --> 00:48:41,607 You take off your pants, shake your wee-wee, get $100. 730 00:48:41,648 --> 00:48:45,569 I can't take off my clothes and dance like that, man. 731 00:48:45,611 --> 00:48:48,405 That's embarrassing, man. 732 00:48:48,447 --> 00:48:49,949 Check it out, man. 733 00:48:49,991 --> 00:48:52,034 The question you got to ask yourself is... 734 00:48:52,075 --> 00:48:53,577 how badly do you want to see... 735 00:48:53,619 --> 00:48:55,704 the greatest fucking rock-and-roll show... 736 00:48:55,746 --> 00:48:57,123 on the fucking earth, right? 737 00:48:57,165 --> 00:49:00,126 You're talkin' Gene and Paul live, y'all. 738 00:49:00,168 --> 00:49:02,794 I'm talkin' about voluptuous women in the audience. 739 00:49:02,836 --> 00:49:06,090 I'm talkin' big breastesses in tight vestesses, my friend. 740 00:49:06,132 --> 00:49:08,885 You're talkin' people passin' around joints in the audience. 741 00:49:08,926 --> 00:49:12,347 You're talkin' about Detroit Rock City, brother. 742 00:49:12,388 --> 00:49:13,765 Shake your wee-wee. 743 00:49:13,806 --> 00:49:15,892 I got stage fright. 744 00:49:16,684 --> 00:49:18,645 And they're playing fucking disco over there. 745 00:49:18,686 --> 00:49:20,813 Shit or get off the pot, rock star. 746 00:49:20,855 --> 00:49:22,107 You want to dance? 747 00:49:22,149 --> 00:49:25,485 Or see Kiss on album covers for the rest of your life? 748 00:49:27,862 --> 00:49:29,906 Mmm, second row, center, brother. 749 00:49:29,947 --> 00:49:31,367 Go shake your wee-wee. 750 00:49:31,408 --> 00:49:33,035 You're gonna have that ticket for me, right? 751 00:49:33,077 --> 00:49:35,787 Oh, yeah, man, you got my solemn oath... 752 00:49:35,828 --> 00:49:38,122 as a public servant. 753 00:49:41,543 --> 00:49:42,961 Go for it, brother. 754 00:49:44,004 --> 00:49:45,797 All right. 755 00:49:45,838 --> 00:49:47,091 See you around. 756 00:49:51,553 --> 00:49:54,098 Hey, chief, you need a ticket? 757 00:49:54,139 --> 00:49:56,642 Seventy-five bucks, second row, center. 758 00:49:56,725 --> 00:49:58,143 I'm gonna beat my ticket... 759 00:49:58,394 --> 00:50:00,104 out of some poor defenseless chump. 760 00:50:00,145 --> 00:50:01,814 You know what I mean? 761 00:50:01,897 --> 00:50:03,065 Yeah, whatever, reefer-head. 762 00:50:03,148 --> 00:50:05,527 You fuckin' burnout. 763 00:50:36,683 --> 00:50:38,060 Take it off, honey! 764 00:50:53,241 --> 00:50:54,535 Gimme! 765 00:50:57,246 --> 00:50:58,539 Don't do that. 766 00:51:04,128 --> 00:51:06,797 I need to sign up for the contest, please. 767 00:51:06,839 --> 00:51:09,091 You're a little scrawny, but thanks to the concert... 768 00:51:09,091 --> 00:51:10,677 we're low on amateurs. Name? 769 00:51:11,594 --> 00:51:12,928 Pick a song, Hawk. 770 00:51:12,928 --> 00:51:14,638 You got any Kiss? 771 00:51:14,680 --> 00:51:16,599 Doubtful. Drink? 772 00:51:16,640 --> 00:51:17,933 Yeah. A man's drink. 773 00:51:22,438 --> 00:51:23,606 Oh, God. 774 00:51:26,818 --> 00:51:27,944 What's this? 775 00:51:27,986 --> 00:51:30,530 You've never seen a bourbon on the rocks before? 776 00:51:32,574 --> 00:51:33,908 Save your money, stud muffin. 777 00:51:33,949 --> 00:51:36,912 Lady at the end of the bar sends her love. 778 00:51:45,879 --> 00:51:49,049 Oh. Shit. 779 00:51:51,468 --> 00:51:52,595 Cheers. 780 00:52:00,144 --> 00:52:01,562 God! 781 00:52:02,688 --> 00:52:05,149 It's gone bad. 782 00:52:21,874 --> 00:52:23,167 Hey, you little twerps. 783 00:52:23,376 --> 00:52:26,171 Give me your Kiss tickets, or I'll pop yourfaces in. 784 00:52:26,171 --> 00:52:28,047 But we don't have any Kiss tickets. 785 00:52:28,089 --> 00:52:29,840 Yeah. Kiss sucks! 786 00:52:29,882 --> 00:52:31,967 What? I ought to kick your asses for saying that. 787 00:52:32,009 --> 00:52:35,681 Give me this instead. Now scram! Get out of here! 788 00:52:42,020 --> 00:52:43,146 Cool. 789 00:52:52,989 --> 00:52:54,866 Simple Simon comin' at you. 790 00:52:54,866 --> 00:52:58,663 It's thirty minutes and counting until Kiss hits the stage... 791 00:52:58,705 --> 00:53:01,164 tonight at Detroit's very own Cobo Hall... 792 00:53:01,206 --> 00:53:05,085 but until then, here they are with "Shock Me"! 793 00:53:05,127 --> 00:53:06,671 Rock on, Ace! 794 00:53:32,155 --> 00:53:34,031 Hey, little kid! 795 00:53:34,073 --> 00:53:36,451 Shit! You just stumped my last ball, you-- 796 00:53:36,492 --> 00:53:37,869 Scream and I'll kick your head off. 797 00:53:37,910 --> 00:53:40,747 OK, booger, your Kiss ticket or your life. 798 00:53:40,747 --> 00:53:42,748 Please, sir, don't beat me up. 799 00:53:42,790 --> 00:53:45,042 I do have a Kiss ticket but not on me. 800 00:53:45,084 --> 00:53:48,422 Oh, likely story. Now hand it over, punk. 801 00:53:48,422 --> 00:53:51,884 No, really. My brother's holding it for safekeeping. 802 00:53:51,925 --> 00:53:54,135 Please, let me get him for you. 803 00:53:54,177 --> 00:53:55,928 Hey, Chongo. 804 00:54:06,940 --> 00:54:08,775 Look, little kid... 805 00:54:08,817 --> 00:54:11,403 I don't need to see Kiss that bad. 806 00:54:11,445 --> 00:54:12,946 Don't try to run, you maggot. 807 00:54:12,988 --> 00:54:15,699 Chongo's an all-state track star in every event. 808 00:54:25,126 --> 00:54:28,962 Lookit, man, you can have my wallet, OK? 809 00:54:28,962 --> 00:54:30,965 I was gonna take your wallet anyway... 810 00:54:30,965 --> 00:54:32,967 after Chongo and his friends crush your ribcage... 811 00:54:32,967 --> 00:54:35,470 Iike a pack of Luckys, punk. 812 00:54:35,511 --> 00:54:37,095 This fairy giving you shit, bro? 813 00:54:37,137 --> 00:54:39,933 He was gonna mug me for my Kiss tickets. 814 00:54:39,974 --> 00:54:41,434 That's nuts. 815 00:54:41,476 --> 00:54:44,771 I said, "Hey, little kid... 816 00:54:44,812 --> 00:54:46,815 "you know where I could take a piss?" 817 00:54:51,527 --> 00:54:54,697 OK, pimple dick, you have the option of walking outside... 818 00:54:54,739 --> 00:54:55,866 or gettin' dragged out. 819 00:54:55,908 --> 00:54:57,493 Please, sir. 820 00:54:57,534 --> 00:54:59,410 Don't kick my ass! 821 00:54:59,452 --> 00:55:02,830 I'll do anything to get out of a beating. 822 00:55:02,830 --> 00:55:05,125 Say, Chongo... 823 00:55:05,167 --> 00:55:07,586 perhaps we could use some extra cash... 824 00:55:07,628 --> 00:55:09,629 for tasty snacks at the Kiss concert... 825 00:55:09,671 --> 00:55:12,132 our weaselly friend won't be attending. 826 00:55:22,685 --> 00:55:24,687 Hey, move those lights over there. 827 00:55:42,162 --> 00:55:43,664 Hey, you. 828 00:55:43,706 --> 00:55:45,709 Man. 829 00:55:45,750 --> 00:55:47,127 Hey, come back here! 830 00:55:49,421 --> 00:55:50,839 Shit! 831 00:55:50,880 --> 00:55:52,840 Come here! Come here! 832 00:55:58,555 --> 00:56:02,518 All right, wise guy. You are so out of here. 833 00:56:02,560 --> 00:56:05,854 Fuck! Keep your paws to yourself, you dumb ape. 834 00:56:05,895 --> 00:56:07,731 Where'd he go? 835 00:56:12,862 --> 00:56:17,657 It's been a while since my boy had Holy Confession. 836 00:56:17,699 --> 00:56:18,784 Could you please-- 837 00:56:18,826 --> 00:56:20,578 Consider it done. 838 00:56:41,724 --> 00:56:43,059 It is about time... 839 00:56:43,101 --> 00:56:46,770 you gave up that stupid dream of yours once and for all! 840 00:56:46,770 --> 00:56:50,149 No son of mine is going to be a career musician... 841 00:56:50,191 --> 00:56:51,818 ever, ever, ever! 842 00:56:51,860 --> 00:56:53,862 Madam, madam. 843 00:56:53,904 --> 00:56:55,614 We are in a cathedral. 844 00:56:55,655 --> 00:56:56,947 I'll walk you out. 845 00:56:56,947 --> 00:56:59,450 Sorry. Sorry. 846 00:57:04,956 --> 00:57:07,501 Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned. 847 00:57:07,583 --> 00:57:10,128 This is my first confession in a... 848 00:57:11,796 --> 00:57:13,381 really long time. 849 00:57:23,433 --> 00:57:25,478 That was our Viking Patrick Hirsch... 850 00:57:25,519 --> 00:57:27,104 and he's hung like a Norse. 851 00:57:27,146 --> 00:57:29,065 Our next amateur has a name like a bird... 852 00:57:29,106 --> 00:57:31,149 and if you like birds, you'll like this. 853 00:57:31,358 --> 00:57:32,944 It's just a swallow. 854 00:57:32,985 --> 00:57:35,947 So, put your hands together, make him feel at home... 855 00:57:35,988 --> 00:57:38,741 and please welcome...Hawk. 856 00:57:41,577 --> 00:57:43,746 Oh, shit. 857 00:57:43,788 --> 00:57:46,958 No, no, no, no. No way, man. 858 00:57:46,999 --> 00:57:48,960 You're not going to chicken out now, are you? 859 00:57:50,671 --> 00:57:52,088 You're right, Deacon. 860 00:57:53,172 --> 00:57:54,757 You're right, man. 861 00:57:55,841 --> 00:57:58,845 Shit! What am I saying? I got to do this. 862 00:57:58,845 --> 00:58:00,013 It's for Kiss. 863 00:59:27,561 --> 00:59:29,353 Oh, my God! 864 01:00:01,762 --> 01:00:04,349 Oh, the stink! 865 01:02:10,728 --> 01:02:13,105 Man! Dang! 866 01:02:20,614 --> 01:02:21,697 Man! 867 01:02:21,739 --> 01:02:23,741 Come back here, you punk! 868 01:02:23,783 --> 01:02:25,368 Move! 869 01:02:35,670 --> 01:02:36,797 Move it! 870 01:02:36,838 --> 01:02:38,882 Get off me, you bitch! 871 01:02:41,552 --> 01:02:43,929 Get up. Come on, move it, sweetie. 872 01:02:43,970 --> 01:02:45,388 Watch it, asshole. 873 01:02:45,430 --> 01:02:48,391 Where is he? Where did he go this time? 874 01:02:52,104 --> 01:02:53,563 Two hundred bucks? 875 01:02:53,605 --> 01:02:54,815 My time's precious... 876 01:02:54,856 --> 01:02:57,777 and that's a reasonable price to pay for your sorry life. 877 01:02:57,777 --> 01:02:59,403 Hold on, man. 878 01:03:00,988 --> 01:03:03,783 Look, I know how I can get the money. 879 01:03:03,825 --> 01:03:05,785 I just figured it out, man. 880 01:03:08,830 --> 01:03:10,915 But you might want to wait outside. 881 01:03:10,957 --> 01:03:11,958 I don't trust him. 882 01:03:11,999 --> 01:03:13,793 I think he's on the level. 883 01:03:13,793 --> 01:03:16,629 He's too stupid to do anything sneaky anyway. 884 01:03:16,629 --> 01:03:18,631 Look at him. He's a moron. 885 01:03:20,466 --> 01:03:23,136 You got fifteen minutes and not a second longer. 886 01:03:23,345 --> 01:03:27,557 Are you sure that you don't want to talk about... 887 01:03:27,598 --> 01:03:31,770 oh, carnal knowledge with a neighborhood girl? 888 01:03:31,812 --> 01:03:36,732 Or how about finding a box of magazines, huh? 889 01:03:36,774 --> 01:03:38,609 Under your dad's bed? 890 01:03:42,155 --> 01:03:45,492 Then I suggest you think of something... 891 01:03:45,534 --> 01:03:49,746 a little juicier to confess than losing Kiss tickets. 892 01:04:12,812 --> 01:04:15,690 You waiting for a confession? I thought you were Jewish. 893 01:04:15,732 --> 01:04:17,942 I have a confession. 894 01:04:31,164 --> 01:04:35,626 I didn't mean for that to be so intense. 895 01:04:35,668 --> 01:04:36,878 I can take it. 896 01:04:38,505 --> 01:04:41,424 I've been in love with you since the moment I saw you. 897 01:04:41,466 --> 01:04:44,635 I've just always been too scared to show it. 898 01:04:44,635 --> 01:04:47,765 That's exactly the same way I've always felt about you. 899 01:04:47,806 --> 01:04:49,892 Jeremiah, really? 900 01:04:49,933 --> 01:04:51,018 Really. 901 01:04:51,060 --> 01:04:54,063 And call me Jam. 902 01:04:54,063 --> 01:04:55,522 It's my band name. 903 01:05:03,572 --> 01:05:07,409 And now, for our grand prize of one hundred dollars... 904 01:05:07,451 --> 01:05:09,411 Don't worry, ladies. I'm not competing. 905 01:05:09,453 --> 01:05:11,623 If I did, you'd want your money back. 906 01:05:11,664 --> 01:05:13,083 And the winner is... 907 01:05:15,417 --> 01:05:16,752 Sir Loin! 908 01:05:34,646 --> 01:05:37,107 Hey, don't look so sad. 909 01:05:37,148 --> 01:05:38,650 The night is young-- 910 01:05:38,691 --> 01:05:41,152 filled with compensatory possibilities. 911 01:05:43,404 --> 01:05:45,116 Oh, thanks for the drinks. 912 01:05:45,157 --> 01:05:47,742 That was really generous. 913 01:05:48,785 --> 01:05:53,123 There's no reason for me to be around these parts anymore. 914 01:05:53,165 --> 01:05:55,960 I'm in a position to spend some money on you... 915 01:05:56,001 --> 01:05:59,587 if you'd get in a position and spend some time on me. 916 01:06:18,607 --> 01:06:21,068 I can't believe you're thinking of robbing this store. 917 01:06:21,110 --> 01:06:22,903 You don't pass "Go" and collect two hundred dollars... 918 01:06:22,945 --> 01:06:24,822 for pulling stuff like this. 919 01:06:24,822 --> 01:06:27,158 No shit. Is this really worth it? 920 01:06:27,325 --> 01:06:29,118 Sure, you're going to get your ass kicked... 921 01:06:29,159 --> 01:06:31,579 nine ways to Sunday by that fucking gorilla... 922 01:06:31,620 --> 01:06:34,374 but that's still a hundred times better... 923 01:06:34,416 --> 01:06:37,419 than getting it porked for the next three to five. 924 01:06:37,460 --> 01:06:39,087 What about that girl, Trip? 925 01:06:39,129 --> 01:06:41,380 She'll never forget this night. 926 01:06:41,422 --> 01:06:44,593 Even if you get away with it, she'll be scarred for life. 927 01:06:44,634 --> 01:06:47,596 When are you going to realize that sometimes being tough... 928 01:06:47,637 --> 01:06:49,556 means being tender? 929 01:06:49,598 --> 01:06:52,017 All right, everybody, shut up! 930 01:07:06,615 --> 01:07:08,618 I'm going to have to do this sometime. 931 01:07:16,876 --> 01:07:18,544 Might as well be now. 932 01:07:20,755 --> 01:07:21,881 Evening, honey. 933 01:07:22,548 --> 01:07:24,550 You know what I am, what this is... 934 01:07:24,550 --> 01:07:26,844 and what you need to do, so let's do it quick. 935 01:07:26,886 --> 01:07:28,512 Everybody else... 936 01:07:28,554 --> 01:07:31,891 kindly introduce yourselves to the floor and kiss it hello. 937 01:07:33,893 --> 01:07:35,811 Do it or die, bitch. 938 01:07:35,853 --> 01:07:37,521 I'm just a high school kid. 939 01:07:38,564 --> 01:07:40,149 Fuck school! 940 01:07:40,359 --> 01:07:43,653 I went through the motions till I was old enough to drop out. 941 01:07:43,695 --> 01:07:46,447 And where's all that studying going to get you tonight? 942 01:07:46,489 --> 01:07:50,369 Robbed at gunpoint and possibly shot in the fucking head! 943 01:07:52,079 --> 01:07:55,082 Hey, scumbag, drop it, or I'll blow your head off. 944 01:08:00,504 --> 01:08:02,381 You and what army? 945 01:08:05,927 --> 01:08:07,552 The Kiss Army. 946 01:08:42,755 --> 01:08:44,382 Oh, God, they're in there. 947 01:09:02,650 --> 01:09:04,319 Oh, shit! 948 01:09:04,361 --> 01:09:05,487 Come on! 949 01:09:21,795 --> 01:09:23,964 God, if you get me out of this... 950 01:09:24,006 --> 01:09:27,551 I swear I will never pull my pork again. 951 01:09:29,095 --> 01:09:30,847 Give me your gun, boy. 952 01:09:30,889 --> 01:09:32,557 You give me your gun, boy. 953 01:09:32,598 --> 01:09:34,766 I don't even think you have a gun. 954 01:09:34,808 --> 01:09:36,310 Neither do l. 955 01:09:36,351 --> 01:09:38,438 For the last time... 956 01:09:38,479 --> 01:09:40,356 take the piece out... 957 01:09:40,398 --> 01:09:41,733 Iay back down... 958 01:09:41,733 --> 01:09:43,734 or your mom's going to need Mr. Clean... 959 01:09:43,734 --> 01:09:46,404 to get the brains out of your ski cap! 960 01:10:28,697 --> 01:10:30,824 Thank you. 961 01:10:32,159 --> 01:10:33,535 Who are you? 962 01:10:33,535 --> 01:10:35,997 Eh, they call me Dr. Love. 963 01:10:51,470 --> 01:10:52,931 Is it true that Gene Simmons... 964 01:10:52,972 --> 01:10:56,017 had a cow's tongue grafted onto his real tongue? 965 01:10:56,059 --> 01:10:57,811 I think he, uh... 966 01:10:57,852 --> 01:11:00,188 had the piece of skin under his tongue removed... 967 01:11:00,397 --> 01:11:02,065 so he could stick it out farther. 968 01:11:02,107 --> 01:11:04,567 I was going to send you this, but... 969 01:11:05,568 --> 01:11:06,736 Ann Arbor? 970 01:11:06,778 --> 01:11:10,198 Yeah. My dad's company is relocating him. 971 01:11:10,407 --> 01:11:12,826 That's why I was acting so freaky at school today. 972 01:11:12,909 --> 01:11:15,537 I thought it'd be the last time I'd ever see you. 973 01:11:28,634 --> 01:11:30,344 Oh, fuck. 974 01:11:32,679 --> 01:11:35,808 You'd better have something really sinful for me this time. 975 01:11:35,850 --> 01:11:38,561 All right, Father, here it is. 976 01:11:38,602 --> 01:11:40,646 I feel a little ashamed talking to you about this... 977 01:11:40,729 --> 01:11:43,607 but I went to my cousin's wedding... 978 01:11:43,649 --> 01:11:45,484 and one of the bridesmaids... 979 01:11:45,526 --> 01:11:48,571 asked me if I wanted to take a bath. 980 01:11:48,612 --> 01:11:50,782 This is terrible. 981 01:11:50,824 --> 01:11:52,534 This girl was a total fox... 982 01:11:52,576 --> 01:11:54,827 so I finally gave into temptation... 983 01:11:54,869 --> 01:11:56,704 about a block away from the wedding reception... 984 01:11:56,745 --> 01:11:58,748 at this little motel that charges by the hour. 985 01:11:58,790 --> 01:12:01,585 When she peeled off that gown... 986 01:12:01,626 --> 01:12:06,840 you are not going to believe what she was wearing underneath. 987 01:12:06,882 --> 01:12:08,175 Was it a teddy? 988 01:12:09,718 --> 01:12:11,469 A bustier? 989 01:12:12,512 --> 01:12:13,972 Satin underwear? 990 01:12:15,640 --> 01:12:17,475 Crotchless panties? 991 01:12:17,475 --> 01:12:19,603 Leopard-skin bra? 992 01:12:20,645 --> 01:12:22,355 Fishnet leotard? 993 01:12:22,397 --> 01:12:24,859 A leather G-string? 994 01:12:26,067 --> 01:12:28,820 All right, guys, here. You want a sandwich? 995 01:12:28,820 --> 01:12:30,947 Come on. Go. Go! 996 01:12:30,989 --> 01:12:33,701 OK, fuck it, man. I give up. 997 01:12:37,662 --> 01:12:40,708 Oh, God, man, what now? Wolves? 998 01:12:51,844 --> 01:12:53,804 All right. 999 01:13:09,528 --> 01:13:12,531 I jump in the car. I hot-wire it in thirty seconds. 1000 01:13:12,573 --> 01:13:15,035 I start driving. Suddenly, I hear this scream. 1001 01:13:15,077 --> 01:13:18,664 The disco queen was asleep in the backseat the whole time. 1002 01:13:19,705 --> 01:13:21,708 What are we going to do with her anyway? 1003 01:13:21,750 --> 01:13:23,710 I don't know, but she looks like fun. 1004 01:13:28,882 --> 01:13:30,634 Hey, hey, take it easy. 1005 01:13:31,635 --> 01:13:32,928 Ah, God. 1006 01:13:32,969 --> 01:13:35,889 You don't want to get any whiskey dick around here. 1007 01:13:35,889 --> 01:13:38,601 Of course, you don't have to worry about that. 1008 01:13:40,561 --> 01:13:43,605 Aw, shit. 1009 01:13:43,647 --> 01:13:46,108 I see you've met Premature Peter. 1010 01:13:46,358 --> 01:13:47,443 I'm sorry. 1011 01:13:47,485 --> 01:13:48,736 That's OK. 1012 01:13:48,778 --> 01:13:50,697 It's been quite a night. 1013 01:13:50,738 --> 01:13:53,156 So far, you've seen me and my dick throw up. 1014 01:13:53,407 --> 01:13:56,369 I'm sure there's more where that came from, right? 1015 01:13:59,163 --> 01:14:00,998 Now come here. 1016 01:14:14,095 --> 01:14:15,596 You guys better kill me... 1017 01:14:15,596 --> 01:14:17,765 before you do what you're thinking about doing... 1018 01:14:17,807 --> 01:14:21,019 because when I get angry, I can bite down very hard. 1019 01:14:21,061 --> 01:14:24,480 Sweet Polly Purebred's got some spunk, huh? 1020 01:14:24,480 --> 01:14:26,315 I'll give her some spunk, all right. 1021 01:14:26,357 --> 01:14:28,318 We can strip that Beemer in fifteen minutes. 1022 01:14:28,360 --> 01:14:30,779 I say we can strip her in fifteen seconds. 1023 01:14:31,864 --> 01:14:34,867 Now, wait a minute, guys. Two on one ain't fair. 1024 01:14:34,907 --> 01:14:37,077 Why don't you let me get my friend Barbara? 1025 01:14:37,119 --> 01:14:40,456 You'd love her-- tits the size of your head. 1026 01:14:40,497 --> 01:14:42,374 You'll feel like a little baby sucking on them. 1027 01:14:42,416 --> 01:14:44,084 You guys like disco? 1028 01:14:44,126 --> 01:14:46,378 I teach disco dancing back at my church. 1029 01:14:46,420 --> 01:14:48,589 You guys look like you got a little rhythm in your blood. 1030 01:14:48,630 --> 01:14:51,633 Free lessons if you let me go. 1031 01:14:51,633 --> 01:14:56,014 Oh, I know a dance we could do-- the Horizontal Hustle. 1032 01:15:00,058 --> 01:15:01,895 Hey, peanut turds. 1033 01:15:01,936 --> 01:15:04,522 I'm here for the girl and the car. 1034 01:15:04,564 --> 01:15:06,399 You can try to stop me... 1035 01:15:06,441 --> 01:15:08,066 but you're not going to like what happens if you do. 1036 01:15:08,108 --> 01:15:10,737 It's too bad. He was such a young idiot. 1037 01:15:10,778 --> 01:15:13,323 Hey, he's a stupid boy. 1038 01:15:13,406 --> 01:15:15,325 He deserves to fucking die. 1039 01:15:25,084 --> 01:15:27,463 Tear these grease monkeys a new asshole! 1040 01:15:38,682 --> 01:15:42,518 One step out of that office, and your asses are Alpo. 1041 01:15:45,522 --> 01:15:47,524 I always come prepared. 1042 01:15:56,867 --> 01:15:58,786 You're the coolest. 1043 01:15:58,827 --> 01:16:02,164 I believe you were promised a ride to Disco lnferno. 1044 01:16:02,373 --> 01:16:04,083 Let me escort you to the car. 1045 01:16:04,124 --> 01:16:05,834 What about the fucking dogs? 1046 01:16:05,876 --> 01:16:08,004 You got a phone in there, man? 1047 01:16:08,046 --> 01:16:09,756 Call the cops. 1048 01:16:09,798 --> 01:16:11,341 You're fuckin' dead! 1049 01:16:16,388 --> 01:16:18,014 Beth, I feel like such an idiot. 1050 01:16:18,056 --> 01:16:20,850 Why didn't I just say something a year and a half ago? 1051 01:16:20,892 --> 01:16:23,310 Don't think about the past. 1052 01:16:23,352 --> 01:16:26,523 Let's just think about from today on. 1053 01:16:27,774 --> 01:16:29,567 I'll never forget you, Jam. 1054 01:16:29,567 --> 01:16:31,820 Church will never be the same. 1055 01:16:49,630 --> 01:16:52,425 God damn it, Beth! 1056 01:16:52,425 --> 01:16:53,884 I'm coming, Dad. 1057 01:16:55,427 --> 01:16:56,553 Well... 1058 01:16:58,347 --> 01:16:59,890 So... 1059 01:16:59,932 --> 01:17:03,436 I'll call you, as soon as we get a phone. 1060 01:17:03,477 --> 01:17:05,146 -All right. -Yeah. 1061 01:17:30,421 --> 01:17:31,590 I hope this helps. 1062 01:17:31,631 --> 01:17:33,383 No, no. You know what? 1063 01:17:33,425 --> 01:17:35,010 Strange as it may seem... 1064 01:17:35,051 --> 01:17:37,971 I don't think I can take the money. 1065 01:17:37,971 --> 01:17:40,432 It would cheapen the whole experience. 1066 01:17:40,474 --> 01:17:44,102 I ain't no Midnight Cowboy or anything like that. 1067 01:17:45,479 --> 01:17:47,022 I'm not paying you for the lovemaking. 1068 01:17:47,063 --> 01:17:48,983 I just want you to have this... 1069 01:17:48,983 --> 01:17:51,943 for whatever you needed it for when I made the offer. 1070 01:17:56,532 --> 01:17:58,618 Thanks. 1071 01:17:59,785 --> 01:18:01,495 Was there any money taken? 1072 01:18:01,536 --> 01:18:02,621 Nope... 1073 01:18:02,662 --> 01:18:06,375 but it is Smiley Mart's policy to give a cash reward of $150... 1074 01:18:06,417 --> 01:18:09,045 to anyone who stops a robbery. 1075 01:18:10,046 --> 01:18:12,756 I gave him the money, and he took off. 1076 01:18:15,259 --> 01:18:17,053 Thanks. 1077 01:18:17,261 --> 01:18:19,472 You see this guy again, call us, all right? 1078 01:18:19,514 --> 01:18:21,766 We want to ask him a few questions. 1079 01:18:21,807 --> 01:18:23,893 If I see Dr. Love again anytime soon... 1080 01:18:23,935 --> 01:18:27,271 you're going to have to wait till I'm done with him first. 1081 01:18:33,819 --> 01:18:35,780 One-thirty... 1082 01:18:35,821 --> 01:18:38,700 one-forty, and one-fifty. 1083 01:18:38,742 --> 01:18:40,744 That's all I got, man. 1084 01:18:47,292 --> 01:18:49,461 I really wanted things to work out for you... 1085 01:18:49,503 --> 01:18:51,380 my weaselly, dimwitted friend. 1086 01:18:51,421 --> 01:18:53,715 You got spunk. 1087 01:19:12,527 --> 01:19:15,530 At least I still got you, Stretch. 1088 01:19:20,493 --> 01:19:21,869 I took his head off. 1089 01:19:29,627 --> 01:19:31,879 Kiss? How dare they call themselves Kiss. 1090 01:19:31,921 --> 01:19:33,297 Kiss is about love. 1091 01:19:33,339 --> 01:19:39,012 They are teaching our children lust, betrayal, and hate. 1092 01:19:39,053 --> 01:19:41,014 We as parents are obligated-- 1093 01:19:41,055 --> 01:19:42,682 How's it going, Mom? 1094 01:19:43,975 --> 01:19:47,021 I'm going to ask you this nicely first. 1095 01:19:47,062 --> 01:19:48,688 Can I have my drumsticks back? 1096 01:19:48,730 --> 01:19:53,318 Your drumsticks are the least of your worries, young man. 1097 01:19:53,360 --> 01:19:54,820 You ran out on God! 1098 01:19:54,862 --> 01:19:57,531 My son just ran out on God! 1099 01:19:57,573 --> 01:20:00,074 You are in a world of-- 1100 01:20:00,324 --> 01:20:01,952 Trouble? 1101 01:20:01,994 --> 01:20:04,997 I've been in trouble for the past twelve hours. 1102 01:20:05,998 --> 01:20:09,294 I'm going to be in St. Bernard's boarding school... 1103 01:20:09,335 --> 01:20:11,587 for the next two years of my life, remember? 1104 01:20:11,628 --> 01:20:14,882 I'm going to be out of your hair until I am a legal adult! 1105 01:20:14,923 --> 01:20:17,009 Then all you have to do is go to church... 1106 01:20:17,050 --> 01:20:19,721 Iight a candle, and pray to some stupid statue... 1107 01:20:19,763 --> 01:20:21,972 and all is forgiven and forgotten, right, Mom? 1108 01:20:22,014 --> 01:20:24,850 Then you can spend your days in a guilt-free pursuit... 1109 01:20:24,892 --> 01:20:26,770 of more constructive activities... 1110 01:20:26,811 --> 01:20:30,732 Iike telling everybody else how screwed up their lives are. 1111 01:20:30,774 --> 01:20:32,399 Then you no longer need the patience... 1112 01:20:32,441 --> 01:20:33,942 and understanding required... 1113 01:20:33,984 --> 01:20:38,364 in order to talk to your own son on some normal plane. 1114 01:20:38,406 --> 01:20:40,408 That way, you don't even need to think... 1115 01:20:40,450 --> 01:20:43,369 about how tough it was for you when you were growing up. 1116 01:20:43,411 --> 01:20:45,789 It's probably a good thing, too, 'cause if you did... 1117 01:20:45,830 --> 01:20:47,415 you'd realize what a lousy... 1118 01:20:47,457 --> 01:20:50,502 goddamn, shitty-ass parent you are. 1119 01:20:55,673 --> 01:20:57,509 What has gotten into you? 1120 01:20:59,010 --> 01:21:02,723 I just lost my virginity in a confessional booth! 1121 01:21:02,765 --> 01:21:05,600 Lord have mercy! 1122 01:21:07,603 --> 01:21:08,854 Now... 1123 01:21:08,896 --> 01:21:11,398 for the last time... 1124 01:21:11,440 --> 01:21:15,527 Mom, give me back my fucking drumsticks. 1125 01:21:16,862 --> 01:21:17,988 Please. 1126 01:21:33,838 --> 01:21:35,006 Cute. 1127 01:21:52,983 --> 01:21:55,527 They grow upfast, don't they? 1128 01:21:57,696 --> 01:21:59,614 Hey, dude. 1129 01:21:59,656 --> 01:22:01,866 Dude, I got the cash, man. Check it out. 1130 01:22:03,660 --> 01:22:05,745 No, that can't be the last ticket! 1131 01:22:05,788 --> 01:22:07,039 God! 1132 01:22:07,790 --> 01:22:10,500 You fucking bastard! 1133 01:22:53,794 --> 01:22:55,714 Any luck? 1134 01:22:55,756 --> 01:22:59,926 Yeah, man, plenty, but it was all bad, man. 1135 01:22:59,968 --> 01:23:01,428 I found the Volvo. 1136 01:23:04,347 --> 01:23:05,766 Tickets? 1137 01:23:11,354 --> 01:23:13,356 Wait a second. I know how we can get in. 1138 01:23:13,398 --> 01:23:17,402 I say that we beat the shit out of each other, right? 1139 01:23:17,444 --> 01:23:18,904 Then we go to the ticket taker... 1140 01:23:18,945 --> 01:23:22,492 and we say that we got mugged and our tickets were stolen. 1141 01:23:22,533 --> 01:23:25,619 They have to let us in then, right? 1142 01:23:30,374 --> 01:23:31,667 Why not? 1143 01:24:03,784 --> 01:24:04,952 Go. 1144 01:24:05,953 --> 01:24:07,995 No! God! 1145 01:24:08,037 --> 01:24:10,414 Oh, man, you got to let us in. 1146 01:24:10,456 --> 01:24:12,084 Four muggers just stole our tickets. 1147 01:24:12,292 --> 01:24:14,294 You expect me to believe that? 1148 01:24:14,336 --> 01:24:16,338 Are you fucking kidding me? 1149 01:24:17,756 --> 01:24:19,049 Look at us. 1150 01:24:20,801 --> 01:24:22,302 It was those assholes right there! 1151 01:24:22,344 --> 01:24:23,887 They stole our tickets! 1152 01:24:23,929 --> 01:24:26,014 Number thirteen! 1153 01:24:26,056 --> 01:24:27,809 Hey, stop those guys. 1154 01:24:32,396 --> 01:24:34,106 They got tickets. 1155 01:24:34,314 --> 01:24:35,482 Let's see. Come here. 1156 01:24:35,524 --> 01:24:37,360 They even stole my wallet, man. 1157 01:24:37,360 --> 01:24:39,903 I've never even seen these assholes before. 1158 01:24:39,945 --> 01:24:43,407 In there, you'll find my Kiss Army picture l.D... 1159 01:24:43,448 --> 01:24:45,493 and a hundred and fifty bucks cash. 1160 01:24:52,875 --> 01:24:54,502 -Out of here. -Damn. 1161 01:24:58,381 --> 01:25:00,718 My midget weaselly friend. 1162 01:25:00,759 --> 01:25:04,721 I was really hoping things could work out for you. 1163 01:25:04,762 --> 01:25:06,764 You got spunk. 1164 01:25:06,806 --> 01:25:08,851 Go. 1165 01:25:08,892 --> 01:25:10,019 I got it, man. 1166 01:25:10,060 --> 01:25:11,562 We're going. 1167 01:25:39,631 --> 01:25:41,300 OK, then. 1168 01:25:52,437 --> 01:25:53,730 We want Kiss! 1169 01:26:09,579 --> 01:26:10,830 This is it. 1170 01:26:15,376 --> 01:26:18,088 You wanted the best, and you got the best! 1171 01:26:18,296 --> 01:26:20,298 The hottest band in the world-- 1172 01:26:20,381 --> 01:26:21,841 Kiss! 1173 01:26:39,651 --> 01:26:42,446 I feel uptight on a Saturday night 1174 01:26:44,824 --> 01:26:46,117 Nine o'clock 1175 01:26:46,325 --> 01:26:49,411 The radio's the only light 1176 01:26:50,538 --> 01:26:51,622 I hear my song 1177 01:26:51,664 --> 01:26:53,332 And it pulls me through 1178 01:26:55,584 --> 01:26:57,337 It comes on strong 1179 01:26:57,379 --> 01:26:59,548 Tells me what I got to do 1180 01:26:59,631 --> 01:27:00,673 I got to 1181 01:27:00,756 --> 01:27:01,841 Get up 1182 01:27:01,841 --> 01:27:03,676 Everybody's gonna move their feet 1183 01:27:03,717 --> 01:27:04,844 Get down 1184 01:27:04,844 --> 01:27:07,430 Everybody's gonna leave their seat 1185 01:27:08,348 --> 01:27:11,976 You gotta lose your mind in Detroit Rock City 1186 01:27:12,017 --> 01:27:13,519 Get up 1187 01:27:13,519 --> 01:27:14,855 Everybody's gonna move their feet 1188 01:27:14,896 --> 01:27:16,314 Get down 1189 01:27:16,314 --> 01:27:17,816 Everybody's gonna leave their seat 1190 01:27:37,961 --> 01:27:40,840 Movin' fast, doin' ninety-five 1191 01:27:43,050 --> 01:27:45,010 I hit top speed 1192 01:27:45,051 --> 01:27:47,638 Still movin' much too slow 1193 01:27:49,015 --> 01:27:50,349 I feel so good 1194 01:27:50,391 --> 01:27:52,727 I'm so alive 1195 01:27:54,561 --> 01:27:56,022 I hear my song 1196 01:27:56,063 --> 01:27:57,815 Playin' on the radio 1197 01:27:57,857 --> 01:27:59,650 And it goes 1198 01:27:59,692 --> 01:28:00,818 Get up 1199 01:28:00,860 --> 01:28:03,989 Everybody's gonna move their feet 1200 01:28:28,512 --> 01:28:29,640 Get up 1201 01:28:29,681 --> 01:28:32,684 Everybody's gonna leave their seat 1202 01:34:38,810 --> 01:34:40,770 We don't have any Kiss tickets. 1203 01:34:40,770 --> 01:34:43,065 Yeah. Kiss sucks!