1
00:01:15,200 --> 00:01:16,910
- Morning.
- Morning.

2
00:01:58,285 --> 00:02:00,329
{\an8}- Good morning.
- Good morning.

3
00:03:13,610 --> 00:03:16,530
- Wave those flags, son.
- Get out of there.

4
00:03:16,613 --> 00:03:18,281
Yeah! Hit them again.

5
00:03:18,365 --> 00:03:19,783
Go on, get out of here!

6
00:03:19,866 --> 00:03:22,369
Get out of them trees! Damn it.

7
00:03:24,121 --> 00:03:25,455
Yeah! Get them!

8
00:03:25,539 --> 00:03:26,832
Migrate south, will you?

9
00:03:26,915 --> 00:03:29,668
Mama? Mama.

10
00:03:30,293 --> 00:03:32,754
- Mama.
- Three more radios for you, Shelby.

11
00:03:32,838 --> 00:03:33,922
Not now, Tommy.

12
00:03:34,005 --> 00:03:37,092
Mama, this nail polish is drying
way too dark.

13
00:03:37,175 --> 00:03:38,635
"Practically Pink", my foot.

14
00:03:38,719 --> 00:03:41,388
Looks like a stuck pig bled
all over my hand.

15
00:03:41,471 --> 00:03:43,807
I'm sure I have something that will do.

16
00:03:44,516 --> 00:03:46,351
Oh, no.

17
00:03:46,435 --> 00:03:49,563
- It has to be delicate.
- Shelby, if I don't have something,

18
00:03:49,646 --> 00:03:53,024
I'll send one of your brothers
to get some delicate pink nail polish.

19
00:03:53,108 --> 00:03:54,693
- Mom...
- Jonathan, just a minute.

20
00:03:54,776 --> 00:03:57,696
Great idea. I'd love to see
what the boys would pick out.

21
00:03:57,779 --> 00:04:00,907
Deliveryman!
Someone stop that truck. Stop that...

22
00:04:03,034 --> 00:04:04,953
Don't put ice down my back!

23
00:04:05,036 --> 00:04:06,913
You should've drowned them at birth.

24
00:04:06,997 --> 00:04:08,081
Shelby.

25
00:04:08,707 --> 00:04:11,126
- Shelby, see if you can get this.
- My nails are wet.

26
00:04:11,209 --> 00:04:12,502
Shelby.

27
00:04:14,296 --> 00:04:17,424
- Ma'am?
- Would you look at those, please?

28
00:04:17,507 --> 00:04:20,302
Dad, over here! Behind the tent. Come on.

29
00:04:20,385 --> 00:04:21,595
Myrtle. Hi.

30
00:04:23,263 --> 00:04:25,557
- Hold on, please.
- I'm gonna get you!

31
00:04:27,559 --> 00:04:30,812
Drum! Sweetheart, I'm on the phone!

32
00:04:32,105 --> 00:04:34,900
Stop that now! I can't hear myself think!

33
00:04:35,692 --> 00:04:39,696
Myrtle, the champagne glasses,
they're all broken. Help.

34
00:04:50,832 --> 00:04:51,917
Spud!

35
00:05:00,967 --> 00:05:02,469
<i>There's a weave inside.</i>

36
00:05:03,678 --> 00:05:06,973
Spud, turn off that stupid television.

37
00:05:07,057 --> 00:05:10,268
Spud, get in here
and finish dyeing these Easter eggs.

38
00:05:10,352 --> 00:05:11,770
I ran out of stuff.

39
00:05:11,853 --> 00:05:14,606
Well, that's why God invented the A&P.

40
00:05:14,689 --> 00:05:18,026
- I gotta work on the truck.
- No, you gotta get the lead out.

41
00:05:18,109 --> 00:05:20,445
Yes, ma'am. I live to serve.

42
00:05:20,529 --> 00:05:24,157
If those eggs are not at the church
by noon, they don't get hidden.

43
00:05:25,492 --> 00:05:27,536
Are you listening to me, Spud?!

44
00:05:31,832 --> 00:05:34,459
- Mrs Jones?
- Are you Annelle?

45
00:05:34,543 --> 00:05:36,586
Oh, you sweet thing, come on.

46
00:05:37,295 --> 00:05:38,296
Excuse me.

47
00:05:39,256 --> 00:05:41,925
Pick up my green dress at the cleaners!

48
00:05:43,051 --> 00:05:45,262
Am I interrupting something?

49
00:05:45,345 --> 00:05:49,683
No, I'm just screaming at my husband.
I can do that anytime.

50
00:05:50,767 --> 00:05:54,396
- Please, call me Truvy.
- Okay. Thank you.

51
00:05:55,689 --> 00:05:58,441
Mama, look at this.
This was in the hall closet.

52
00:05:58,525 --> 00:05:59,568
What is it?

53
00:06:00,443 --> 00:06:01,486
Rubbers.

54
00:06:02,112 --> 00:06:05,240
Tommy says Jonathan's planning to cover
the honeymoon getaway car with these.

55
00:06:06,908 --> 00:06:08,952
- Please stop him.
- Keep your voice down.

56
00:06:09,035 --> 00:06:10,912
Keep your voice... Jonathan!

57
00:06:10,996 --> 00:06:13,039
Boys, I wanna talk to you!

58
00:06:13,123 --> 00:06:15,375
Tommy. Jonathan. Tommy!

59
00:06:15,458 --> 00:06:19,713
Jonathan, don't you decorate
your sister's car with condoms!

60
00:06:19,796 --> 00:06:20,964
It's tacky!

61
00:06:22,799 --> 00:06:24,384
It's like talking to a brick wall.

62
00:06:26,011 --> 00:06:28,597
If he's trying to drive me crazy,
it's too late.

63
00:06:28,680 --> 00:06:31,141
There must be a better way
to get rid of those birds.

64
00:06:31,224 --> 00:06:33,476
Well, we could cut down all our trees.

65
00:06:33,560 --> 00:06:37,480
Or change the migratory patterns of the
birds in North America. Take your pick.

66
00:06:37,564 --> 00:06:39,649
You're the one that told him
to get rid of them.

67
00:06:39,733 --> 00:06:43,403
I had no idea he would alienate
the entire neighbourhood.

68
00:06:43,486 --> 00:06:45,488
The neighbourhood would be
a lot more alienated

69
00:06:45,572 --> 00:06:48,033
if they got covered in bird shit
at my reception.

70
00:06:48,116 --> 00:06:49,326
Pretty talk.

71
00:06:50,035 --> 00:06:51,828
Do you have to be so crude?

72
00:06:54,915 --> 00:06:55,916
Okay.

73
00:07:03,882 --> 00:07:06,051
- There.
- Okay.

74
00:07:07,302 --> 00:07:09,971
- I see a hole.
- Yeah, I was hoping you'd catch that.

75
00:07:11,014 --> 00:07:14,351
It's a little bit poofier
than I would normally do,

76
00:07:14,434 --> 00:07:15,435
but I'm nervous.

77
00:07:15,518 --> 00:07:17,187
Oh, I'm not worried about that.

78
00:07:17,270 --> 00:07:20,774
I usually wrap my entire head
in toilet paper when I go to bed at night,

79
00:07:20,857 --> 00:07:24,736
so it usually gets pretty shmushed down
in that process anyway.

80
00:07:24,819 --> 00:07:26,529
In my class at the trade school,

81
00:07:26,613 --> 00:07:29,741
I was number one
when it came to frosting and streaking.

82
00:07:29,824 --> 00:07:31,368
I did my own.

83
00:07:31,451 --> 00:07:32,452
Really?

84
00:07:33,203 --> 00:07:34,204
That's good.

85
00:07:34,287 --> 00:07:37,749
And I can usually spot a bottle job
at 20 paces.

86
00:07:39,167 --> 00:07:41,711
- Your technique is really good.
- Thanks.

87
00:07:41,795 --> 00:07:45,131
I think your form and content
will improve with time.

88
00:07:45,882 --> 00:07:50,095
So best I can tell, young lady,
you've just landed yourself a job.

89
00:07:50,178 --> 00:07:51,471
Oh, God!

90
00:07:51,554 --> 00:07:54,808
Oh, thank you! Oh, thank you, Miss Truvy.

91
00:07:54,891 --> 00:07:56,476
No time for thanks this morning.

92
00:07:56,559 --> 00:07:58,979
We're gonna be busier
than a one-armed paper hanger.

93
00:07:59,062 --> 00:08:01,773
- Here, let me help you.
- It's all right. I got it.

94
00:08:01,856 --> 00:08:04,401
You got tiny little hairs
and fuzzies all over you.

95
00:08:04,484 --> 00:08:07,153
There's so much static electricity
in this room,

96
00:08:07,237 --> 00:08:09,322
I pick up everything but boys and money.

97
00:08:14,285 --> 00:08:15,412
Louie!

98
00:08:15,495 --> 00:08:17,372
Louie, hold up.

99
00:08:17,455 --> 00:08:18,957
I want you to meet Annelle.

100
00:08:19,040 --> 00:08:21,876
- Hi.
- She's taking Judy's place.

101
00:08:21,960 --> 00:08:23,128
Swell.

102
00:08:24,671 --> 00:08:26,798
Louie, take out the garbage!

103
00:08:26,881 --> 00:08:29,217
Can't. Late.

104
00:08:31,177 --> 00:08:32,679
What'd you hire her for?

105
00:08:36,516 --> 00:08:40,145
Our son. We're so proud of him.

106
00:08:41,312 --> 00:08:43,898
Annelle, honey,
what do you say we talk some trash?

107
00:08:43,982 --> 00:08:44,983
Okay.

108
00:08:47,402 --> 00:08:50,280
{\an8}I am so excited.
I can't believe it's happening.

109
00:08:50,363 --> 00:08:52,741
{\an8}I'm a beautician.

110
00:08:52,824 --> 00:08:54,951
{\an8}Glamour technician.

111
00:08:55,035 --> 00:08:56,911
{\an8}Glamour technician.

112
00:08:56,995 --> 00:08:58,246
{\an8}And I'll have you know,

113
00:08:58,329 --> 00:09:02,000
{\an8}you are working
in the most successful shop in this town.

114
00:09:02,083 --> 00:09:06,296
{\an8}'Cause I have a strict philosophy
that I have stuck to for 15 years.

115
00:09:06,379 --> 00:09:09,507
There is no such thing as natural beauty.

116
00:09:09,591 --> 00:09:12,260
"There is no such thing
as natural beauty."

117
00:09:12,343 --> 00:09:14,929
You remember that,
or we're all out of a job.

118
00:09:15,013 --> 00:09:18,349
Well, just look at me, Annelle.
It takes some effort to look like this.

119
00:09:18,433 --> 00:09:19,893
Oh, I can see that.

120
00:09:21,269 --> 00:09:24,689
- So how long have you been in town?
- A few weeks.

121
00:09:24,773 --> 00:09:28,735
New in town.
It must be exciting being in a new place.

122
00:09:28,818 --> 00:09:31,571
I wouldn't know.
I've lived here all my life.

123
00:09:32,530 --> 00:09:34,741
Well, tell me things about yourself.

124
00:09:35,742 --> 00:09:40,747
There's nothing to tell. I live here.
I've got a job now. That's it.

125
00:09:40,830 --> 00:09:43,458
{\an8}Can I borrow a few of these back issues
of <i>Southern Hair?</i>

126
00:09:43,541 --> 00:09:44,709
{\an8}Sure, take them.

127
00:09:44,793 --> 00:09:48,379
{\an8}It is essential to stay abreast
of the latest styles.

128
00:09:48,463 --> 00:09:50,256
{\an8}And I'm glad to see your interest.

129
00:09:51,841 --> 00:09:53,885
Well, you must live close by.

130
00:09:53,968 --> 00:09:56,888
At least in walking distance, I mean.
I didn't see a car.

131
00:09:59,349 --> 00:10:00,934
{\an8}I don't have a car.

132
00:10:01,810 --> 00:10:04,854
{\an8}I've been staying across the river
at Robeline's boarding house.

133
00:10:05,647 --> 00:10:07,273
Well, that's quite a walk.

134
00:10:08,858 --> 00:10:12,821
Ruth Robeline.
Now, there is a story for you.

135
00:10:13,738 --> 00:10:16,074
{\an8}She is a troubled, twisted soul.

136
00:10:16,157 --> 00:10:19,369
{\an8}Her whole life has been
an experiment in terror.

137
00:10:19,452 --> 00:10:22,038
Her husband got killed in World War I I.

138
00:10:22,122 --> 00:10:24,541
Then her son got killed in Vietnam.

139
00:10:24,624 --> 00:10:26,751
I have to tell you,
when it comes to suffering,

140
00:10:26,835 --> 00:10:29,295
she is right up there
with Elizabeth Taylor.

141
00:10:29,379 --> 00:10:31,214
I had no idea.

142
00:10:34,217 --> 00:10:35,343
Hello!

143
00:10:35,426 --> 00:10:37,554
- Clairee.
- Good morning. Good morning.

144
00:10:37,637 --> 00:10:41,349
Annelle, I'd like to introduce you
to the former first lady of Chinquapin,

145
00:10:41,432 --> 00:10:44,686
Miss Belcher.
Clairee, I'd like you to meet Annelle.

146
00:10:44,769 --> 00:10:46,437
I'm a little embarrassed. I'm windblown.

147
00:10:46,521 --> 00:10:49,482
I've just been to the dedication
of the new children's park.

148
00:10:49,566 --> 00:10:51,317
Yeah. How did that go?

149
00:10:51,401 --> 00:10:52,777
Beautifully.

150
00:10:52,861 --> 00:10:58,283
Except Janice van Meter got hit
with a baseball. It was fabulous.

151
00:10:58,366 --> 00:11:02,328
- Was she hurt?
- I doubt it. She got hit in the head.

152
00:11:02,412 --> 00:11:06,040
Janice van Meter is
the current mayor's wife. We hate her.

153
00:11:06,124 --> 00:11:08,960
They just named the new park
after Clairee's late husband.

154
00:11:09,043 --> 00:11:11,254
This town is so proud of her.

155
00:11:11,337 --> 00:11:13,006
That's nice.

156
00:11:13,089 --> 00:11:15,341
What's your family name, dear?

157
00:11:16,342 --> 00:11:18,970
Well, my married name is Dupuy,

158
00:11:19,053 --> 00:11:21,347
but I'm originally from Zwolle.

159
00:11:21,431 --> 00:11:22,849
How nice.

160
00:11:22,932 --> 00:11:26,769
Annelle, there's some towels in the dryer.
Would you fold them and bring them in?

161
00:11:26,853 --> 00:11:28,897
- Sure.
- Thank you.

162
00:11:28,980 --> 00:11:30,982
Sweet gal. Where'd you find her?

163
00:11:31,065 --> 00:11:32,609
Yesterday, when Judy quit,

164
00:11:32,692 --> 00:11:36,487
I called up the trade school
and I told them to send me a warm body.

165
00:11:36,571 --> 00:11:40,491
And Annelle was the valedictorian
of the hairdo class.

166
00:11:40,575 --> 00:11:43,286
And I think there's a story there.

167
00:11:44,078 --> 00:11:45,580
What makes you say that?

168
00:11:45,663 --> 00:11:47,707
Well, for starters, she's married,

169
00:11:47,790 --> 00:11:51,920
but she's living over
at Ruth Robeline's alone.

170
00:11:52,003 --> 00:11:54,797
I'd get to the bottom of this
if I were you.

171
00:11:54,881 --> 00:11:57,133
You have some nice silverware
you'd like to keep.

172
00:11:57,217 --> 00:12:00,762
Oh, I'm not worried about that at all.
She's just as sweet as she can be.

173
00:12:00,845 --> 00:12:05,016
And besides, I kind of like the idea
of hiring somebody with a past.

174
00:12:05,642 --> 00:12:08,937
She can't be more than 18.
She hasn't had time to have a past.

175
00:12:09,020 --> 00:12:11,814
Oh, get with it, Clairee.
This is the '80s.

176
00:12:11,898 --> 00:12:14,692
If you can achieve puberty,
you can achieve a past.

177
00:12:17,153 --> 00:12:18,780
That man!

178
00:12:18,863 --> 00:12:22,325
I swear, I don't know
how M'Lynn puts up with that.

179
00:12:25,453 --> 00:12:26,829
Go on, get out of here.

180
00:13:01,030 --> 00:13:02,031
Jackson, please.

181
00:13:02,115 --> 00:13:04,284
I'm gonna talk some sense into you
if it kills me.

182
00:13:04,367 --> 00:13:07,829
Get back to Aunt Laura's. It's bad luck
to see me before the wedding.

183
00:13:07,912 --> 00:13:09,289
So you are gonna marry me.

184
00:13:10,623 --> 00:13:11,958
- Jackson, get...
- Come on, now.

185
00:13:12,041 --> 00:13:14,752
We can work this out. Shelby, please.

186
00:13:15,670 --> 00:13:18,006
You know you wanna go through with this.

187
00:13:18,089 --> 00:13:20,591
You don't wanna have to give back
all the wedding presents.

188
00:13:21,259 --> 00:13:23,845
That VCR alone is worth
getting married for.

189
00:13:25,179 --> 00:13:26,431
And I love you.

190
00:13:29,726 --> 00:13:31,269
If my daddy catches you here,

191
00:13:31,352 --> 00:13:35,148
the question of whether or not
I can carry your children will not matter.

192
00:13:35,231 --> 00:13:36,899
He will cut your thing off.

193
00:13:36,983 --> 00:13:38,860
Say you're gonna marry me.

194
00:13:39,652 --> 00:13:41,070
I hate suspense.

195
00:13:43,031 --> 00:13:44,907
Okay. Okay.

196
00:13:46,159 --> 00:13:49,412
You meet me 2:00, Presbyterian Church.

197
00:13:49,495 --> 00:13:51,581
I'll be the one in the veil down front.

198
00:13:58,963 --> 00:14:01,174
I'm gonna make you very happy.

199
00:14:07,555 --> 00:14:08,765
We'll see.

200
00:14:14,103 --> 00:14:16,647
Boy. Give me the Sports.

201
00:14:23,821 --> 00:14:26,240
Boys. We're off to Truvy's.

202
00:14:26,324 --> 00:14:29,285
Jonathan, I want you to keep your eye
on your brother Tommy.

203
00:14:29,369 --> 00:14:30,620
Am I my brother's keeper?

204
00:14:30,703 --> 00:14:32,830
You're your brother's warden
is what you are.

205
00:14:32,914 --> 00:14:36,334
And that horrible woman is coming by
to deliver the groom's cake in about an...

206
00:14:40,338 --> 00:14:43,049
- Where's your father?
- His coffee kicked in.

207
00:14:46,886 --> 00:14:48,262
Shelby, let's go.

208
00:14:48,346 --> 00:14:50,515
Coming, Mama. I said I'd be right there.

209
00:14:55,520 --> 00:14:58,106
Shelby, you're gonna be late
for your own wedding.

210
00:14:58,189 --> 00:15:01,317
I'm going to wear my hair down
'cause Jackson likes my hair down.

211
00:15:01,401 --> 00:15:03,903
The veil would be so much prettier
with your hair up.

212
00:15:03,986 --> 00:15:05,488
Get over it, Mama.

213
00:15:09,075 --> 00:15:11,953
Oh, God. Come here. Stop it, Rhett!

214
00:15:12,036 --> 00:15:13,454
Oh, shit!

215
00:15:13,996 --> 00:15:15,873
- It's Miss Ouiser.
- Back door.

216
00:15:20,420 --> 00:15:21,629
Drum!

217
00:15:21,712 --> 00:15:23,548
Rhett, come here. M'Lynn!

218
00:15:24,424 --> 00:15:26,592
Open the door! I know you're in there!

219
00:15:27,593 --> 00:15:30,430
- Mom?
- I think there's somebody at the door.

220
00:15:30,513 --> 00:15:32,014
I think it's for Daddy.

221
00:15:32,974 --> 00:15:34,475
I know you're in there!

222
00:15:37,979 --> 00:15:38,980
Say, "Please."

223
00:15:39,647 --> 00:15:40,648
Thank you.

224
00:15:42,692 --> 00:15:44,444
Get over here, Rhett!

225
00:15:44,527 --> 00:15:46,154
Sweetheart, stop pulling!

226
00:15:46,237 --> 00:15:48,072
Sit down, Rhett!

227
00:15:48,156 --> 00:15:50,032
Sit! Sit.

228
00:15:52,243 --> 00:15:54,871
Ouiser, you look like hammered shit.

229
00:15:54,954 --> 00:15:56,581
Don't you talk to me like that.

230
00:15:57,331 --> 00:15:59,459
I'm sorry. You look like regular shit.

231
00:15:59,542 --> 00:16:02,086
I have such a bone to pick with you.

232
00:16:06,090 --> 00:16:08,426
Stop that. Stop egging him on.
Come here. Stop it.

233
00:16:09,218 --> 00:16:10,928
I have just come from the vet.

234
00:16:11,971 --> 00:16:13,222
Come here, Rhett.

235
00:16:13,973 --> 00:16:16,934
Whitey Black says that all this noise

236
00:16:17,018 --> 00:16:20,146
that you've been making around here
for the last few days

237
00:16:20,229 --> 00:16:23,316
has been causing
a nervous condition in my dog.

238
00:16:23,399 --> 00:16:26,110
Look at this. All his hair's falling out.

239
00:16:27,904 --> 00:16:29,906
I gotta give this animal tranquilizers.

240
00:16:29,989 --> 00:16:31,532
Whitey Black is a moron.

241
00:16:31,616 --> 00:16:34,577
I'm not even sure he has opposable thumbs.

242
00:16:34,660 --> 00:16:37,580
Now, if you'll excuse me, I've got
a little work out in the backyard.

243
00:16:40,041 --> 00:16:41,751
- Hi, Miss Ouiser.
- Hi, Miss Ouiser.

244
00:16:41,834 --> 00:16:43,419
Leave me alone.

245
00:16:43,503 --> 00:16:46,547
Now, you listen to me.
I don't know if I'm coming or going.

246
00:16:46,631 --> 00:16:47,715
Get out of here.

247
00:16:47,798 --> 00:16:50,968
I heard you got so screwed up,
you cut your dog out of your will

248
00:16:51,052 --> 00:16:53,596
and had an ungrateful nephew put to sleep.

249
00:16:53,679 --> 00:16:56,307
I am about at the end of my rope.

250
00:16:56,390 --> 00:16:58,809
Well, you tie a noose in it
and slip it over your head.

251
00:17:03,064 --> 00:17:04,232
Damn it, Ouiser.

252
00:17:05,942 --> 00:17:07,318
I don't wanna have to kill you.

253
00:17:07,860 --> 00:17:09,278
Boys, bring me my gun!

254
00:17:09,362 --> 00:17:13,533
Don't you threaten me, Drum Eatenton,
or I will call the police.

255
00:17:13,616 --> 00:17:18,412
I gotta scare away about 5 zillion birds
this afternoon before Shelby's reception.

256
00:17:18,496 --> 00:17:20,581
If I don't,
I'll have to deal with my wife.

257
00:17:20,665 --> 00:17:23,000
And I make it a point
never to deal with my wife.

258
00:17:23,084 --> 00:17:26,462
That dog is on his last legs. What am
I gonna do with that poor animal?

259
00:17:26,546 --> 00:17:27,838
Serve him on toast.

260
00:17:31,592 --> 00:17:33,803
You get those magnolias out of my tree?

261
00:17:33,886 --> 00:17:36,889
The judge has not decided
whose tree that is exactly.

262
00:17:36,973 --> 00:17:38,224
It is mine.

263
00:17:39,183 --> 00:17:41,435
I will speak to M'Lynn about this.

264
00:17:44,939 --> 00:17:47,525
Now, are these chocolate chips
semisweet or milk?

265
00:17:47,608 --> 00:17:48,818
They're milk.

266
00:17:48,901 --> 00:17:52,405
- Is the Karo syrup light or dark?
- It's a matter of taste.

267
00:17:52,488 --> 00:17:54,615
Where's the other one
you were talking about?

268
00:17:54,699 --> 00:17:55,950
"Cuppa, Cuppa, Cuppa."

269
00:17:56,033 --> 00:17:58,411
Oh, that's simple.
You don't need to write that down.

270
00:17:58,494 --> 00:18:02,498
That's a cup of flour, a cup of sugar,
a cup of fruit cocktail, with the juice,

271
00:18:02,582 --> 00:18:06,294
and you mix and bake at 350
till gold and bubbly.

272
00:18:06,377 --> 00:18:08,296
- Sounds awfully rich.
- It is.

273
00:18:08,379 --> 00:18:11,299
So I serve it over ice cream
to cut the sweetness.

274
00:18:12,091 --> 00:18:13,384
I'll be right back, honey.

275
00:18:14,635 --> 00:18:17,138
Well, M'Lynn,
looks like you're ready to roll.

276
00:18:17,221 --> 00:18:20,099
And I think we can trust Annelle here
to do that.

277
00:18:20,182 --> 00:18:22,852
Honey, her coiffure card's
in a little box on the counter.

278
00:18:22,935 --> 00:18:25,479
Oh, I don't know.
Today is a very special day

279
00:18:25,563 --> 00:18:27,815
and my work tends to be too poofy
when I'm nervous.

280
00:18:27,898 --> 00:18:29,859
You stop that. You're a professional now.

281
00:18:29,942 --> 00:18:33,070
So just get over there and bang some hair.

282
00:18:36,449 --> 00:18:38,576
Does your dress have to go over your head?

283
00:18:39,910 --> 00:18:41,037
No.

284
00:18:41,120 --> 00:18:42,371
Oh, good.

285
00:18:44,040 --> 00:18:46,083
- I'm sorry.
- Relax.

286
00:18:46,167 --> 00:18:47,585
You can't screw up her hair.

287
00:18:47,668 --> 00:18:50,713
Just tease it and make it look
like a brown football helmet.

288
00:18:50,796 --> 00:18:53,382
I must have missed the passage
in <i>Emily Post</i> that said:

289
00:18:53,466 --> 00:18:56,969
"All abuse is heaped
on the mother of the bride."

290
00:18:57,053 --> 00:18:59,263
Oh, hush, girls.

291
00:18:59,347 --> 00:19:02,558
Shelby, your mama never tells us much.
What's Jackson like?

292
00:19:02,642 --> 00:19:05,478
He's really cute.
And I thought he was a pest at first,

293
00:19:05,561 --> 00:19:08,189
but then he kind of grew on me
and now I love him.

294
00:19:08,272 --> 00:19:10,733
You made a very good catch, Shelby.

295
00:19:10,816 --> 00:19:14,028
Louisiana lawyers do well,
whether they want to or not.

296
00:19:14,111 --> 00:19:15,279
Oh, I don't really care.

297
00:19:15,363 --> 00:19:18,491
Well, I mean, don't get me wrong,
the money is real nice and all.

298
00:19:18,574 --> 00:19:22,328
But I just like the idea
of growing old with somebody.

299
00:19:22,995 --> 00:19:25,206
My dream is to get old
and sit on the back porch,

300
00:19:25,289 --> 00:19:29,460
covered with grandchildren,
and say "No!" and "Stop that!"

301
00:19:29,543 --> 00:19:31,587
Are you gonna quit your nursing job?

302
00:19:31,671 --> 00:19:32,963
Never. I love it.

303
00:19:33,047 --> 00:19:35,841
I love being around all those babies.

304
00:19:35,925 --> 00:19:39,929
Drum and I both feel that she should
not work after she gets married.

305
00:19:40,012 --> 00:19:44,100
Well, I'm so anxious to discuss this topic
for the 900th time this week.

306
00:19:44,183 --> 00:19:46,102
You should not be on your feet all day.

307
00:19:46,185 --> 00:19:48,396
You should be kinder
to your circulatory system.

308
00:19:48,896 --> 00:19:50,856
You know what you need in here, Truvy?

309
00:19:50,940 --> 00:19:52,483
You need a radio.

310
00:19:52,566 --> 00:19:55,069
Music is a wonderful thing
to have in the background.

311
00:19:55,152 --> 00:19:58,823
It takes the pressure off everybody
feeling they have to talk so much.

312
00:19:58,906 --> 00:20:01,951
I used to have one,
but I slammed it against the wall

313
00:20:02,034 --> 00:20:04,620
when I couldn't figure out
where the batteries went.

314
00:20:04,704 --> 00:20:09,458
Of course, I know now I was suffering
from premenstrual syndrome.

315
00:20:10,459 --> 00:20:12,586
Radio? What did I just hear...?

316
00:20:12,670 --> 00:20:14,380
Oh, yes.

317
00:20:14,463 --> 00:20:18,217
The Antilley family is selling KPPD.

318
00:20:18,300 --> 00:20:21,429
I wonder how much radio stations sell for.

319
00:20:21,512 --> 00:20:22,888
Miss Clairee.

320
00:20:22,972 --> 00:20:25,933
You should buy KPPD.
You got plenty of money.

321
00:20:26,016 --> 00:20:28,102
What would I do with a radio station?

322
00:20:28,185 --> 00:20:32,273
Business never interested me.
Lloyd took care of all that stuff.

323
00:20:33,607 --> 00:20:37,027
Shelby, I hope you and Jackson will be
as happy as Lloyd and I were.

324
00:20:37,111 --> 00:20:39,238
We had such a good time.

325
00:20:40,322 --> 00:20:41,907
Until November.

326
00:20:43,909 --> 00:20:46,537
Well, at least he hung on through
the state playoffs.

327
00:20:46,620 --> 00:20:49,832
Miss Clairee, there are still good times
to be had.

328
00:20:51,167 --> 00:20:54,628
Well, I really do love football.

329
00:20:54,712 --> 00:20:57,965
But it's hard to parlay that
into a reason to live.

330
00:20:59,717 --> 00:21:01,260
What are your colours, Shelby?

331
00:21:01,343 --> 00:21:03,929
They're "blush" and "bashful".

332
00:21:04,013 --> 00:21:06,474
Her colours are "pink" and "pink".

333
00:21:06,557 --> 00:21:09,810
My colours are "blush" and "bashful",
Mama.

334
00:21:09,894 --> 00:21:12,688
How precious is this wedding gonna get,
I ask you?

335
00:21:12,772 --> 00:21:16,484
My colours are "blush" and "bashful".
I have chosen two shades of pink.

336
00:21:16,567 --> 00:21:18,402
One is much deeper than the other.

337
00:21:18,486 --> 00:21:21,989
But the bridesmaids' dresses,
they are really beautiful.

338
00:21:22,072 --> 00:21:23,991
Ceremony will be too.

339
00:21:24,825 --> 00:21:26,994
The walls are banked
with sprays of flowers

340
00:21:27,077 --> 00:21:29,914
in my two shades of "blush" and "bashful".

341
00:21:29,997 --> 00:21:32,875
Pink carpets specially laid out
for my service,

342
00:21:32,958 --> 00:21:37,296
and pink silk bunting draped
over anything that would stand still.

343
00:21:37,379 --> 00:21:40,883
That sanctuary looks like it's been
hosed down with Pepto-Bismol.

344
00:21:40,966 --> 00:21:44,136
I like pink. Pink is my signature color.

345
00:21:44,220 --> 00:21:45,596
How many bridesmaids?

346
00:21:46,138 --> 00:21:49,308
- Nine.
- Nine? Good Lord.

347
00:21:49,391 --> 00:21:53,646
Exactly. Mama made me have my cousins
and Margie St. Maurice.

348
00:21:53,729 --> 00:21:57,191
Shelby, let's not go into this now.
You know there was no way around it.

349
00:21:57,274 --> 00:21:58,818
It will be pretentious.

350
00:21:58,901 --> 00:22:02,738
And Daddy always says, "An ounce
of pretension is worth a pound of manure."

351
00:22:03,280 --> 00:22:05,241
The poet laureate of Dogwood Lane.

352
00:22:05,324 --> 00:22:07,493
Mama, I wish you'd get off Daddy's back.

353
00:22:07,576 --> 00:22:10,538
- I don't really wanna get in...
- Fill us in on the reception.

354
00:22:11,622 --> 00:22:14,041
My reception. My reception.

355
00:22:14,124 --> 00:22:19,338
Ferns, dancing, tons of people.
Every pink flower west of the Mississippi.

356
00:22:19,421 --> 00:22:21,966
Wedding cake in the dining room
and the groom's cake...

357
00:22:22,967 --> 00:22:24,343
hidden in the carport?

358
00:22:25,636 --> 00:22:27,888
Shelby and I, we agree on one thing:

359
00:22:27,972 --> 00:22:29,765
- The groom's cake.
- The groom's cake.

360
00:22:30,850 --> 00:22:31,976
It's awful.

361
00:22:32,643 --> 00:22:35,354
It's in the shape of a giant armadillo.

362
00:22:35,437 --> 00:22:38,607
An armadillo? You're joking, right?

363
00:22:38,691 --> 00:22:41,318
No. Jackson wanted a cake
in the shape of an armadillo.

364
00:22:41,402 --> 00:22:44,655
- And he's got an aunt that makes them.
- It's unusual.

365
00:22:44,738 --> 00:22:48,158
It's repulsive. It's got gray icing.

366
00:22:48,242 --> 00:22:51,245
I can't even begin to think
how you'd make gray icing.

367
00:22:51,328 --> 00:22:55,541
Worse, the cake part is red velvet cake.
Blood red.

368
00:22:55,624 --> 00:22:58,085
People are gonna be hacking
into this poor animal

369
00:22:58,168 --> 00:23:00,212
that looks like it's bleeding to death.

370
00:23:00,296 --> 00:23:02,506
The rehearsal supper was
a real experience.

371
00:23:02,590 --> 00:23:04,258
Mama, it wasn't that bad.

372
00:23:05,342 --> 00:23:07,761
It was out at Jackson's uncle's place
on the river.

373
00:23:07,845 --> 00:23:11,432
Jackson comes from a good old Southern
family with good old Southern values.

374
00:23:11,515 --> 00:23:13,601
You either shoot it, stuff it,
or marry it.

375
00:23:14,643 --> 00:23:16,562
They're simply outdoorsy, that's all.

376
00:23:16,645 --> 00:23:19,899
Did y'all do anything especially romantic?

377
00:23:19,982 --> 00:23:22,985
We drove down to Frenchmen's Point
and went parking.

378
00:23:24,570 --> 00:23:27,197
Oh, Shelby. Really.

379
00:23:27,281 --> 00:23:30,618
Oh, M'Lynn, leave her alone.
This is my favourite part.

380
00:23:30,701 --> 00:23:34,747
This is the romantic part.
See, that's what really melts my butter.

381
00:23:34,830 --> 00:23:39,627
Well, then we went skinny-dipping and
we did things that frightened the fish.

382
00:23:39,710 --> 00:23:42,922
It's been a long time
since we've had a youngster in this place.

383
00:23:43,005 --> 00:23:45,174
We talked and talked and talked.

384
00:23:45,257 --> 00:23:49,762
I love those kind of talks,
in the arms of the man you love.

385
00:23:49,845 --> 00:23:52,264
Actually, we fought most of the time.

386
00:23:52,348 --> 00:23:53,390
You fought?

387
00:23:54,308 --> 00:23:56,185
'Cause I told him I wouldn't marry him.

388
00:23:56,810 --> 00:23:57,811
What?

389
00:23:58,395 --> 00:24:00,230
Why'd you go do a thing like that?

390
00:24:00,314 --> 00:24:02,942
Oh, it's okay now. We worked it all out.

391
00:24:03,567 --> 00:24:07,029
Oh, it was probably just one
of those last-minute jitter things.

392
00:24:07,112 --> 00:24:09,281
No, but the wedding's still on.

393
00:24:09,365 --> 00:24:11,617
Well, thank goodness.

394
00:24:11,700 --> 00:24:15,371
Because this is going
in the Hairdo Hall of Fame.

395
00:24:15,454 --> 00:24:16,830
Shelby, you scared us.

396
00:24:16,914 --> 00:24:19,041
That wasn't a nice thing to do
to your mama.

397
00:24:19,124 --> 00:24:20,584
Never say a thing like that

398
00:24:20,668 --> 00:24:23,295
to a woman who's marinating
50 pounds of crab claws.

399
00:24:24,129 --> 00:24:27,257
But the making up can be so romantic.

400
00:24:28,968 --> 00:24:31,053
I miss romance so much.

401
00:24:31,136 --> 00:24:33,764
Oh, Truvy, it can't be that bad.

402
00:24:33,847 --> 00:24:34,974
Oh, really, now?

403
00:24:35,057 --> 00:24:39,186
Well, the last romantic thing
my husband did for me was back in 1972.

404
00:24:39,269 --> 00:24:42,564
He enclosed this carport
so I could support him.

405
00:24:42,648 --> 00:24:45,734
Well, Truvy, I think I have something
that could cheer you up.

406
00:24:45,818 --> 00:24:48,445
Drum and I have been planning
on talking to your husband

407
00:24:48,529 --> 00:24:51,365
- about building a room onto our house.
- M'Lynn, are you serious?

408
00:24:51,448 --> 00:24:55,744
If you give Spud a job, I'll give you hot
oil treatments for the rest of your life.

409
00:24:57,830 --> 00:25:01,458
Annelle, this looks pretty good.
I think you know what you're doing.

410
00:25:01,542 --> 00:25:02,835
Thank you.

411
00:25:02,918 --> 00:25:05,421
Mrs Eatenton, you have great hair.

412
00:25:05,504 --> 00:25:08,257
- And your scalp's as clean as a whistle.
- I try.

413
00:25:08,340 --> 00:25:09,925
Well, it must run in the family.

414
00:25:10,009 --> 00:25:13,303
This young'un's got the prettiest head
of hair I ever had my hands in.

415
00:25:13,387 --> 00:25:17,016
So thick. Just 'cause I'm bragging on you
don't mean you can get lazy on me.

416
00:25:17,099 --> 00:25:18,559
Hold your head up, Shelby.

417
00:25:18,642 --> 00:25:20,477
- Stop it.
- Shelby?

418
00:25:21,186 --> 00:25:23,272
Shelby. M'Lynn!

419
00:25:24,982 --> 00:25:26,316
I'll get some juice.

420
00:25:28,444 --> 00:25:31,864
- Truvy, there's some candy in my purse.
- I have some right here.

421
00:25:33,615 --> 00:25:35,242
Shelby. Shelby.

422
00:25:35,325 --> 00:25:39,246
Hold on. Clairee's getting you some juice.
Shelby, Shelby, Shelby.

423
00:25:39,329 --> 00:25:41,832
- Should I get her a cookie?
- No. Juice is better.

424
00:25:43,250 --> 00:25:45,419
- Here's the juice.
- Shelby.

425
00:25:45,502 --> 00:25:48,130
Shelby, you need some juice.
You need some juice.

426
00:25:48,213 --> 00:25:50,299
- Stop it, Mama.
- Drink the juice.

427
00:25:50,382 --> 00:25:52,468
- Please drink the juice.
- No!

428
00:25:52,551 --> 00:25:55,012
Stop it, Mama!
I have some candy in my purse.

429
00:25:55,095 --> 00:25:56,847
No, you didn't bring your purse.

430
00:25:56,930 --> 00:25:59,016
You didn't bring your purse.
No, you didn't.

431
00:25:59,099 --> 00:26:01,351
No, here you go. There you go.

432
00:26:01,435 --> 00:26:02,561
Drink some of this.

433
00:26:04,730 --> 00:26:06,231
It's not any wonder

434
00:26:06,315 --> 00:26:09,068
with all this running around
and wedding nonsense.

435
00:26:09,818 --> 00:26:12,112
Excuse me.
Should I call the doctor or something?

436
00:26:12,196 --> 00:26:14,406
- No, no.
- She's a diabetic.

437
00:26:14,490 --> 00:26:17,159
She just has a little too much insulin,
that's all.

438
00:26:17,242 --> 00:26:20,079
We'll get a little more in her.
She'll be all right.

439
00:26:20,162 --> 00:26:23,207
If you don't leave me alone,
I'm gonna leave.

440
00:26:23,290 --> 00:26:26,668
Oh, I'd love to see you try.
Cooperate, please.

441
00:26:26,752 --> 00:26:28,670
Honey, drink. Please.

442
00:26:28,754 --> 00:26:32,841
Come on, now. Thattagirl. Yes, yes, yes.

443
00:26:32,925 --> 00:26:34,760
There you go. There you go.

444
00:26:34,843 --> 00:26:37,096
There, there, there. That's a start.

445
00:26:37,179 --> 00:26:38,847
This one hit her fast.

446
00:26:39,723 --> 00:26:41,642
She's been so upset lately.

447
00:26:43,185 --> 00:26:45,521
Dr Mitchell told her
on her last appointment...

448
00:26:47,689 --> 00:26:49,191
children aren't possible.

449
00:26:51,318 --> 00:26:53,904
Don't talk about me like I'm not here.

450
00:26:56,573 --> 00:27:00,369
She's making some sense now. Yes, she is.

451
00:27:00,452 --> 00:27:03,664
This one was not bad at all.
It was not bad at all.

452
00:27:03,747 --> 00:27:06,333
No. I think we need a little more juice.

453
00:27:06,416 --> 00:27:08,502
Could I do something to help?

454
00:27:08,585 --> 00:27:12,047
No, no. She'll be fine.
Don't fuss over her.

455
00:27:12,131 --> 00:27:13,966
Normality's very important to Shelby.

456
00:27:14,049 --> 00:27:15,717
- Here, M'Lynn.
- Thanks.

457
00:27:15,801 --> 00:27:19,263
I'm really sorry
about the children part, M'Lynn.

458
00:27:19,346 --> 00:27:20,681
I know.

459
00:27:20,764 --> 00:27:24,518
She's afraid that Jackson will be throwing
away his chance to have children.

460
00:27:26,979 --> 00:27:28,105
Jackson said:

461
00:27:29,815 --> 00:27:31,525
"Shelby, don't be stupid.

462
00:27:32,609 --> 00:27:35,654
There's plenty of kids out there
need good homes."

463
00:27:35,737 --> 00:27:36,738
Drink some.

464
00:27:40,409 --> 00:27:44,121
"We'll adopt ten of them.
We'll buy them if we have to."

465
00:27:44,204 --> 00:27:46,832
Jackson sounds like good people to me.

466
00:27:49,001 --> 00:27:50,043
Yeah.

467
00:27:55,549 --> 00:27:56,884
Oh, Mama, I'm sorry.

468
00:27:56,967 --> 00:27:59,052
- That's all right, honey.
- Oh, I'm sorry.

469
00:27:59,136 --> 00:28:01,555
It's all right. It's all over now.

470
00:28:01,638 --> 00:28:03,891
- It's all... You hold your juice.
- Okay.

471
00:28:04,725 --> 00:28:06,101
- It's all over.
- Okay.

472
00:28:06,185 --> 00:28:08,061
- Hold your juice. All right.
- Okay.

473
00:28:09,438 --> 00:28:11,481
- Okay.
- You all right?

474
00:28:12,608 --> 00:28:14,776
- Truvy, I'm sorry.
- Oh, I'll fix it.

475
00:28:14,860 --> 00:28:17,237
- We'll fix it.
- Okay.

476
00:28:19,323 --> 00:28:20,449
Okay.

477
00:28:24,286 --> 00:28:25,287
Okay.

478
00:28:26,496 --> 00:28:29,166
- What'd I do with my gun?
- Well, where'd you leave it?

479
00:28:29,249 --> 00:28:30,834
How the hell do I know?

480
00:28:31,835 --> 00:28:35,005
Well, come on, we have work to do.
Daylight's burning.

481
00:28:35,881 --> 00:28:37,382
We're gonna get rid of some birds.

482
00:28:44,181 --> 00:28:46,767
- Got the arrows, Daddy.
- All right. All right.

483
00:28:46,850 --> 00:28:49,394
Hey, hey. Lookit here. Lookit here.

484
00:28:49,478 --> 00:28:52,272
- Let's load them up and kill them birds.
- I got the target.

485
00:28:52,356 --> 00:28:54,399
No, we're not going target shooting.
Forget that.

486
00:28:56,526 --> 00:28:59,029
Miss Clairee, what cute shoes.

487
00:28:59,112 --> 00:29:02,282
You think so? I'm not so sure myself.

488
00:29:03,200 --> 00:29:06,495
They seem a little too racy for me.
I'll probably give them away.

489
00:29:06,578 --> 00:29:08,830
Oh, they're just too cha-cha for words.

490
00:29:08,914 --> 00:29:11,458
If you decide to get rid of them,
I'll buy them.

491
00:29:11,541 --> 00:29:12,793
What size you wear?

492
00:29:12,876 --> 00:29:17,381
Well, in a good shoe, I wear a size 6.
But a 7 feels so good, I buy a size 8.

493
00:29:17,464 --> 00:29:19,424
- They're 8 and a half.
- Perfect!

494
00:29:20,384 --> 00:29:21,969
Lord, give us strength.

495
00:29:23,929 --> 00:29:25,180
Come here, Rhett!

496
00:29:26,265 --> 00:29:29,601
That is one ugly dog.
What kind of dog is that?

497
00:29:29,685 --> 00:29:32,062
If it had hair, it'd be a Saint Bernard.

498
00:29:32,980 --> 00:29:35,607
This is it. I have found it. I am in hell.

499
00:29:35,691 --> 00:29:37,067
Good morning, Ouiser.

500
00:29:37,150 --> 00:29:40,612
Don't try to get on my good side, Truvy.
I no longer have one.

501
00:29:40,696 --> 00:29:43,073
- Come here, Rhett.
- You're a little early, ain't you?

502
00:29:43,156 --> 00:29:45,409
That is precisely why I'm here.

503
00:29:45,492 --> 00:29:47,744
I've got to talk to M'Lynn
about her husband.

504
00:29:48,370 --> 00:29:51,123
He is a boil on the butt of humanity.

505
00:29:51,206 --> 00:29:54,334
I'm sorry, Ouiser.
This whole thing has gotten out of hand.

506
00:29:54,418 --> 00:29:55,919
It's not your fault, M'Lynn.

507
00:29:56,795 --> 00:29:59,381
I used to think you were crazy
for marrying that man.

508
00:29:59,464 --> 00:30:02,426
Then, for a few years, I thought
you were a glutton for punishment.

509
00:30:02,968 --> 00:30:06,346
Now I realise you must be
on some mission from God.

510
00:30:06,430 --> 00:30:09,224
Miss Ouiser,
Daddy isn't trying to drive you crazy.

511
00:30:09,308 --> 00:30:11,601
He's just trying
to make my reception nice.

512
00:30:11,685 --> 00:30:13,603
His heart's in the right place.

513
00:30:13,687 --> 00:30:17,899
Ouiser, I know for a fact
there will be no more gunshots.

514
00:30:17,983 --> 00:30:20,068
But he was gonna fire a gun at me.

515
00:30:20,152 --> 00:30:21,403
They're blanks.

516
00:30:21,486 --> 00:30:24,281
Drum would never, ever point a gun
at a lady.

517
00:30:25,240 --> 00:30:26,450
He's a real gentleman.

518
00:30:26,533 --> 00:30:29,745
I bet he takes the dishes out of the sink
before he pees in it.

519
00:30:38,628 --> 00:30:39,880
Who the hell are you?

520
00:30:42,758 --> 00:30:43,759
Annelle.

521
00:30:43,842 --> 00:30:45,719
- Ouiser, this is my new...
- Fine.

522
00:30:45,802 --> 00:30:47,929
Now, I know everybody in this town.

523
00:30:48,013 --> 00:30:50,515
And I don't recall having seen you before.

524
00:30:51,850 --> 00:30:54,311
Well, I just moved into town
not too long ago.

525
00:30:54,394 --> 00:30:55,562
With your family?

526
00:30:57,105 --> 00:31:00,025
- No, I don't have any family to speak of.
- Your husband?

527
00:31:02,903 --> 00:31:05,113
- My husband?
- Yes.

528
00:31:07,157 --> 00:31:09,451
Well, that's kind of hard to say.

529
00:31:11,370 --> 00:31:13,663
- I don't know.
- You don't know?

530
00:31:14,956 --> 00:31:16,333
Well, I'm not sure.

531
00:31:16,917 --> 00:31:19,336
You're not sure. I'm intrigued.

532
00:31:19,419 --> 00:31:22,631
Are you married or not?
These are not difficult questions.

533
00:31:27,302 --> 00:31:29,638
Well, we're...

534
00:31:31,181 --> 00:31:32,641
I can't talk about it.

535
00:31:32,724 --> 00:31:34,324
- Of course you can.
- Of course you can.

536
00:31:36,686 --> 00:31:40,816
Well, I'm not sure
if I'm married or not. He's gone.

537
00:31:40,899 --> 00:31:43,193
Men are the most horrible creatures,
honey.

538
00:31:43,276 --> 00:31:45,487
They will ruin your life,
you mark my words.

539
00:31:45,570 --> 00:31:47,572
Everything is horrible.

540
00:31:48,281 --> 00:31:51,785
Bunkie, that's my husband,
he just vanished last week.

541
00:31:51,868 --> 00:31:54,830
He took all the money,
my jewellery, the car.

542
00:31:54,913 --> 00:31:57,082
Most of my clothes were in the trunk.

543
00:31:57,165 --> 00:31:59,209
He's in big trouble with the law.

544
00:32:00,377 --> 00:32:01,920
Drugs or something.

545
00:32:02,921 --> 00:32:06,299
The police keep questioning me,
but I don't know anything.

546
00:32:07,008 --> 00:32:09,886
They say that our marriage
may not be legal.

547
00:32:10,470 --> 00:32:12,681
Oh, I wish you'd have said something.

548
00:32:14,057 --> 00:32:17,477
I was scared to.
I need a job in the worst way.

549
00:32:17,561 --> 00:32:21,106
I didn't know if you would hire someone
who may or may not be married

550
00:32:21,189 --> 00:32:24,359
to someone who might be
a dangerous criminal.

551
00:32:24,443 --> 00:32:28,029
But, Miss Truvy, I swear to you
that my personal tragedy

552
00:32:28,113 --> 00:32:31,032
will not interfere
with my ability to do good hair.

553
00:32:31,116 --> 00:32:33,201
Of course it won't.

554
00:32:34,619 --> 00:32:36,788
I really don't think
things could get any worse.

555
00:32:36,872 --> 00:32:39,249
- Of course they can.
- We are awful.

556
00:32:40,542 --> 00:32:43,044
We are hateful, awful people.

557
00:32:43,128 --> 00:32:47,048
Here, all we've been talking about
is weddings and psychotic animals.

558
00:32:47,132 --> 00:32:49,259
What can we do to help?

559
00:32:49,342 --> 00:32:50,719
I know one thing I can do.

560
00:32:50,802 --> 00:32:54,764
You're gonna drop by my house and have
some bleeding armadillo groom's cake.

561
00:32:54,848 --> 00:32:57,392
- Oh, yes, you must.
- Oh, no, I couldn't.

562
00:32:57,476 --> 00:33:00,103
I still get real emotional sometimes.

563
00:33:00,187 --> 00:33:03,482
Well, not today, you won't.
It is going to be a great party.

564
00:33:04,566 --> 00:33:06,651
I don't have anything to wear.

565
00:33:06,735 --> 00:33:10,697
No problem. I'll bet I have something
that'll do. I'm gonna call the house.

566
00:33:11,740 --> 00:33:12,740
Thanks.

567
00:33:16,745 --> 00:33:19,206
- All right. Load me up.
- All right.

568
00:33:22,042 --> 00:33:23,418
- That's it.
- There's a fuse.

569
00:33:23,502 --> 00:33:24,711
All right.

570
00:33:24,794 --> 00:33:25,837
We're ready.

571
00:33:26,463 --> 00:33:27,464
All right.

572
00:33:28,131 --> 00:33:30,509
Are you ready? Get out... Stand back.
Here we go.

573
00:33:40,810 --> 00:33:42,812
What the hell is that?!

574
00:33:49,236 --> 00:33:52,614
- Got them right between the legs, Dad.
- All right, you nailed them.

575
00:33:52,697 --> 00:33:53,865
- What?
- Yeah!

576
00:33:56,701 --> 00:33:59,996
I hope no one was hurt.
Shelby, get my things.

577
00:34:05,669 --> 00:34:06,962
Rhett!

578
00:34:08,380 --> 00:34:11,007
Miss Ouiser,
that dog will eat Daddy alive!

579
00:34:11,091 --> 00:34:13,009
Oh, no!

580
00:34:13,093 --> 00:34:15,595
Ouiser, talk to your dog!
He'll listen to you.

581
00:34:15,679 --> 00:34:18,348
- Please, it's my wedding day.
- Say something to your dog!

582
00:34:18,431 --> 00:34:20,475
Kill, Rhett! Kill!

583
00:34:20,559 --> 00:34:22,602
Daddy, what happened?!

584
00:34:22,686 --> 00:34:24,187
Bite him in the balls!

585
00:35:02,892 --> 00:35:03,893
Sorry.

586
00:35:26,583 --> 00:35:27,751
I'm sorry.

587
00:35:31,838 --> 00:35:32,839
Now.

588
00:35:34,382 --> 00:35:35,425
Shelby?

589
00:35:37,260 --> 00:35:38,928
Shelby, it's time.

590
00:35:39,929 --> 00:35:42,057
Daddy. It's time.

591
00:35:43,224 --> 00:35:46,394
Daddy, it's time. It's time.

592
00:35:46,478 --> 00:35:48,021
- It's time?
- Yes.

593
00:36:26,851 --> 00:36:28,311
You look perfect.

594
00:36:55,588 --> 00:36:57,632
Who gives this woman in marriage?

595
00:36:59,843 --> 00:37:01,678
Her mother and I do.

596
00:37:08,601 --> 00:37:09,894
Dearly beloved...

597
00:37:24,075 --> 00:37:26,494
This has been
the happiest day of my life, Daddy.

598
00:37:26,578 --> 00:37:29,038
Oh, I'm glad, sugar.

599
00:37:29,122 --> 00:37:31,791
- I'm not talking too loud, am I?
- No, you're fine.

600
00:37:33,626 --> 00:37:35,503
Shelby loves you very much.

601
00:37:36,880 --> 00:37:38,548
I hope so.

602
00:37:38,631 --> 00:37:40,717
Cost me 60 bucks to rent this sucker.

603
00:37:42,010 --> 00:37:44,012
I'm being serious.

604
00:37:44,095 --> 00:37:46,723
So am I. I got the receipt right here.

605
00:37:49,392 --> 00:37:51,269
Could I say this, please?

606
00:37:54,063 --> 00:37:55,857
Shelby is so happy.

607
00:37:57,817 --> 00:37:59,486
I know when you're young,

608
00:38:00,361 --> 00:38:03,531
it seems like everything will always
be perfect. Maybe it will be.

609
00:38:06,826 --> 00:38:11,331
Promise me you'll think about it before
you make any big decisions about family.

610
00:38:11,414 --> 00:38:13,166
I know what you're saying.

611
00:38:14,834 --> 00:38:15,834
Good.

612
00:38:48,493 --> 00:38:49,661
What can I get you?

613
00:38:50,495 --> 00:38:51,830
Nothing. No, thanks.

614
00:38:51,913 --> 00:38:53,456
You sure? It's free.

615
00:38:55,959 --> 00:38:57,043
Come on, what'll it be?

616
00:38:58,127 --> 00:38:59,504
A Cherry Coke.

617
00:39:00,505 --> 00:39:01,506
Sure.

618
00:39:05,093 --> 00:39:08,012
So are you a friend of the bride
or the groom?

619
00:39:08,096 --> 00:39:09,097
Neither.

620
00:39:10,056 --> 00:39:11,641
Shelby invited me.

621
00:39:12,475 --> 00:39:14,394
I don't know why I'm here.

622
00:39:14,477 --> 00:39:16,187
I'm Sammy.

623
00:39:16,980 --> 00:39:20,149
And this here is the best Cherry Coke
in the history of the world.

624
00:39:31,661 --> 00:39:32,871
Can I help you, sir?

625
00:39:40,086 --> 00:39:43,673
That Jackson, he is one big hanging man.

626
00:39:43,756 --> 00:39:45,091
Yes, I know.

627
00:39:45,174 --> 00:39:47,802
Nancy Beth, come along.

628
00:39:47,886 --> 00:39:49,387
Calories, calories.

629
00:39:49,470 --> 00:39:51,764
"Calories, calories."

630
00:39:51,848 --> 00:39:53,850
I don't like Belle Marmillion.

631
00:39:53,933 --> 00:39:57,812
I don't trust anybody that does
their own hair. I don't think it's normal.

632
00:39:57,896 --> 00:40:00,481
She's the best volunteer we have
at the Mental Guidance Center.

633
00:40:00,565 --> 00:40:02,358
She's so good with troubled children.

634
00:40:02,442 --> 00:40:05,194
Wish I'd taken Louie there
and got him straightened out.

635
00:40:05,278 --> 00:40:07,155
I should've known Louie had problems

636
00:40:07,238 --> 00:40:09,824
when his imaginary playmates
wouldn't play with him.

637
00:40:09,908 --> 00:40:12,744
Your boy grew up fine.
He's just a little scary, that's all.

638
00:40:12,827 --> 00:40:17,749
I just think it'd be fun to have access
to all that secret, personal information.

639
00:40:17,832 --> 00:40:19,667
Oh, come on, M'Lynn.

640
00:40:19,751 --> 00:40:21,878
Won't you tell me
some of your most bizarre cases?

641
00:40:21,961 --> 00:40:23,463
Let's see if I can figure out

642
00:40:23,546 --> 00:40:24,756
- who they are.
- No.

643
00:40:24,839 --> 00:40:27,258
There's some pretty sick tickets
in this town.

644
00:40:27,342 --> 00:40:28,676
I will do no such thing.

645
00:40:28,760 --> 00:40:30,595
- Now cut that out.
- Oh, you old fuddy-duddy.

646
00:40:41,397 --> 00:40:43,566
- Yes, please.
- Hey.

647
00:40:43,650 --> 00:40:45,109
I'm not speaking to you.

648
00:40:46,069 --> 00:40:47,487
Oh, what a shame.

649
00:40:48,363 --> 00:40:49,489
I mean it, Drum.

650
00:40:50,448 --> 00:40:53,534
Ouiser, can we call a truce long enough
for me to get a piece of cake?

651
00:41:02,585 --> 00:41:03,962
Thanks, Ouiser.

652
00:41:04,045 --> 00:41:06,005
Nothing like a good piece of ass.

653
00:41:09,008 --> 00:41:14,013
Clairee, you know I'd rather walk
on my lips than to criticize anybody,

654
00:41:14,722 --> 00:41:17,600
but Janice van Meter...

655
00:41:17,684 --> 00:41:18,810
I know.

656
00:41:18,893 --> 00:41:21,980
I'll bet you money
she's paid $500 for that dress

657
00:41:22,063 --> 00:41:24,315
and don't even bother to wear a girdle.

658
00:41:24,399 --> 00:41:28,069
Looks like two pigs fighting
under a blanket.

659
00:41:30,571 --> 00:41:35,410
Well, I haven't left the house without
Lycra on these thighs since I was 14.

660
00:41:35,493 --> 00:41:37,161
You were brought up right.

661
00:41:37,245 --> 00:41:40,245
- Congratulations, Drum. Fantastic party.
- Oh, it's the best day, isn't it?

662
00:41:43,084 --> 00:41:46,421
Ouiser. Ouiser, there's someone
I'd like you to meet.

663
00:41:47,296 --> 00:41:48,965
That looks like an autopsy.

664
00:41:49,048 --> 00:41:51,843
This is Jackson's Aunt Fern Thornton...

665
00:41:52,802 --> 00:41:54,095
from Alexandria.

666
00:41:55,013 --> 00:41:56,472
She made the cake.

667
00:41:57,473 --> 00:41:59,600
- You did this?
- Guilty.

668
00:42:00,643 --> 00:42:03,855
It's very simple, really.
It just takes patience.

669
00:42:04,647 --> 00:42:06,441
You only do armadillos?

670
00:42:06,524 --> 00:42:08,359
No, I can do anything.

671
00:42:08,443 --> 00:42:11,696
Except snakes.
I don't have the counter space.

672
00:43:38,241 --> 00:43:39,242
Mama?

673
00:43:40,493 --> 00:43:41,577
Help me.

674
00:43:43,788 --> 00:43:44,831
Here.

675
00:43:53,172 --> 00:43:56,008
Well, this is it.
You're finally rid of me.

676
00:43:58,594 --> 00:44:00,638
I think you'll be back every now and then.

677
00:44:03,307 --> 00:44:05,935
Corsages are pretty stupid
when you think about it, aren't they?

678
00:44:06,978 --> 00:44:09,230
You make Jackson Latcherie
take good care of you.

679
00:44:10,898 --> 00:44:12,984
Mama, Jackson will take care of me.

680
00:44:13,734 --> 00:44:15,361
And I'll take care of him.

681
00:44:17,155 --> 00:44:18,573
And I'm not stupid.

682
00:44:21,117 --> 00:44:22,368
I'll get my bags.

683
00:44:52,023 --> 00:44:54,317
Well, the boys just brought
the car around.

684
00:44:55,151 --> 00:44:56,527
What did they do to it?

685
00:44:59,197 --> 00:45:00,823
Let me put it this way.

686
00:45:02,033 --> 00:45:04,869
If you and Jackson wanna
practice safe sex,

687
00:45:04,952 --> 00:45:06,245
you're all set.

688
00:45:52,750 --> 00:45:54,418
Truvy, are you leaving so early?

689
00:45:54,502 --> 00:45:57,880
Yeah. But I'll have some sweet dreams
with this under my pillow.

690
00:45:57,964 --> 00:46:01,175
- Tell your husband I hope he feels better.
- Oh, he's gonna be fine.

691
00:46:01,259 --> 00:46:03,135
- Say hello to Spud for me.
- I'll do it.

692
00:46:03,219 --> 00:46:06,514
I'm sure he's sorry he missed all this.
It was a beautiful wedding.

693
00:46:06,597 --> 00:46:08,140
- Thanks, Truvy.
- Thanks a lot. Bye.

694
00:46:08,933 --> 00:46:10,518
- You leaving so soon?
- All right.

695
00:46:33,541 --> 00:46:34,583
Hi.

696
00:46:34,667 --> 00:46:35,710
Hello.

697
00:46:39,088 --> 00:46:41,340
Would you like a ride?

698
00:46:45,928 --> 00:46:47,179
I have new shoes.

699
00:46:48,097 --> 00:46:49,640
I have to break them in.

700
00:46:54,603 --> 00:46:56,772
- Bye.
- Well, good night. It was a lovely day.

701
00:46:56,856 --> 00:46:58,858
- Keep her away from me, will you?
- Stop it.

702
00:46:59,859 --> 00:47:01,902
Walk me home, Clairee.

703
00:47:01,986 --> 00:47:03,654
You just live over there.

704
00:47:03,738 --> 00:47:06,157
I don't wanna walk in that house
by myself.

705
00:47:06,240 --> 00:47:07,658
You watch the evening news.

706
00:47:07,742 --> 00:47:10,578
You watch the news, you know
what kind of world we're living in.

707
00:47:10,661 --> 00:47:13,539
- Walk me home.
- Who's gonna walk me home?

708
00:47:13,622 --> 00:47:15,333
You've got the flashlight.

709
00:47:15,416 --> 00:47:17,710
- My car's parked over there.
- Come on, I wanna...

710
00:47:17,793 --> 00:47:21,172
This is ridiculous.
You're only a few feet away from here.

711
00:47:21,255 --> 00:47:22,423
Follow me.

712
00:47:22,506 --> 00:47:26,552
My goodness, you're acting like a child.
The older you get, the sillier you get.

713
00:47:26,635 --> 00:47:29,430
And the older you get, the uglier you get.

714
00:47:50,534 --> 00:47:55,164
And last, but never least,
Santa's most beautiful helper,

715
00:47:55,247 --> 00:48:00,294
this year's Miss Merry Christmas,
Nancy Beth Marmillion!

716
00:48:06,967 --> 00:48:10,471
Get it while the getting's good!
Best food in Louisiana.

717
00:48:10,554 --> 00:48:15,559
Blood, sweat and tears go
in every little bowlful. Right, boys?

718
00:48:15,643 --> 00:48:16,936
That's right, Truvy!

719
00:48:18,979 --> 00:48:22,108
- One, two, three, four.
- Shelby!

720
00:48:22,191 --> 00:48:25,027
- Get your little country butt over here.
- Hi.

721
00:48:25,111 --> 00:48:28,614
Were you trying to sneak by us
without buying some of our jumbo shrimp?

722
00:48:28,697 --> 00:48:31,158
- No.
- They're hot and spicy, just like Annelle.

723
00:48:31,242 --> 00:48:33,285
Truvy, stop.

724
00:48:33,369 --> 00:48:37,248
You really should try one. We've already
pulled their little heads off them.

725
00:48:37,331 --> 00:48:39,041
No, thanks. I'm just killing time.

726
00:48:39,125 --> 00:48:41,877
Jackson's found a firearm.
We may never see him again.

727
00:48:41,961 --> 00:48:44,755
How about some iced tea?
It's the house wine of the South.

728
00:48:44,839 --> 00:48:47,258
- Perfect.
- Oh, coming up.

729
00:48:47,341 --> 00:48:50,302
I bet your mama's happy
you got home in time for the festival.

730
00:48:50,386 --> 00:48:53,681
I wouldn't miss the festival
for the world. How's your family?

731
00:48:53,764 --> 00:48:57,518
Oh, fine. Spud's as outgoing as ever.

732
00:48:57,601 --> 00:48:59,353
Louie brought his girlfriend home.

733
00:48:59,437 --> 00:49:04,108
The nicest thing I can say about her is
all her tattoos are spelled correctly.

734
00:49:04,191 --> 00:49:05,359
Truvy.

735
00:49:05,443 --> 00:49:07,445
- Put your money away.
- Thanks.

736
00:49:07,528 --> 00:49:08,696
- Big one?
- Big one.

737
00:49:08,779 --> 00:49:12,032
Well, my hair's not the only thing
that's changed.

738
00:49:12,116 --> 00:49:13,909
So much has happened.

739
00:49:13,993 --> 00:49:18,330
After they finally put Bunkie Dupuy
behind bars and I was rid of him,

740
00:49:18,414 --> 00:49:22,626
I went wild. I was running around,
drinking, smoking.

741
00:49:22,710 --> 00:49:24,420
Jezebel.

742
00:49:24,503 --> 00:49:26,964
Truvy helped me see the error of my ways.

743
00:49:27,047 --> 00:49:28,716
She gave me a place to live.

744
00:49:28,799 --> 00:49:33,512
Now I go to church. I've done guest
lectures on beauty at the trade school.

745
00:49:33,596 --> 00:49:36,891
Our little Annelle here has become one
of the hottest tickets in town.

746
00:49:36,974 --> 00:49:38,726
- Oh, Truvy, hush.
- It's true.

747
00:49:39,602 --> 00:49:41,312
Well, I am enjoying the city more.

748
00:49:41,395 --> 00:49:44,273
And I'm so excited
about this Christmas festival.

749
00:49:44,356 --> 00:49:46,442
There's a Messiah sing-along tomorrow.

750
00:49:46,525 --> 00:49:48,152
- Oh, no!
- What's the matter?

751
00:49:48,235 --> 00:49:50,446
- Nobody move! Nobody move!
- Annelle.

752
00:49:50,529 --> 00:49:51,989
My contact!

753
00:49:52,072 --> 00:49:54,116
- Oh, no. Don't move.
- Stay back. Stay back.

754
00:49:54,200 --> 00:49:56,660
- We'll find it.
- Excuse me, can you back up, please?

755
00:49:56,744 --> 00:50:00,164
Hello, darlings.
When did you get into town?

756
00:50:00,247 --> 00:50:01,248
This afternoon.

757
00:50:02,249 --> 00:50:03,876
- Here. Merry Christmas.
- Oh, thanks.

758
00:50:03,959 --> 00:50:07,463
I been trying to show Jackson everything.
He's never been to the festival.

759
00:50:07,546 --> 00:50:10,132
Make sure you listen
to the football game tonight.

760
00:50:10,216 --> 00:50:13,093
- Sure. What are we listening for?
- Me. I'm a working gal now.

761
00:50:13,177 --> 00:50:16,680
- Didn't your mama tell you?
- Mama never tells anyone anything.

762
00:50:16,764 --> 00:50:19,558
I'm the color announcer for the Devils.
I'm fabulous.

763
00:50:19,642 --> 00:50:22,269
I'm just too colorful for words.

764
00:50:22,353 --> 00:50:24,146
Nice of them to let you talk on the radio.

765
00:50:24,230 --> 00:50:28,150
Nice, nothing. I own the radio station!

766
00:50:28,234 --> 00:50:31,237
- You bought it!
- Yes! KPPD.

767
00:50:31,320 --> 00:50:34,615
The station of choice
in Chinquapin Parish.

768
00:50:34,698 --> 00:50:36,158
Mrs Belcher, we gotta go!

769
00:50:36,242 --> 00:50:37,576
- Bye.
- The kick-off!

770
00:50:39,495 --> 00:50:42,331
<i>This has been
an extremely hard-fought football game,</i>

771
00:50:42,414 --> 00:50:44,875
<i>considering the fact
that the Dry Prong lines</i>

772
00:50:44,959 --> 00:50:49,129
<i>just don't seem to have
the kind of depth that Chinquapin has.</i>

773
00:50:52,925 --> 00:50:53,926
Well?

774
00:50:55,761 --> 00:50:59,139
Well, Rolly Bassett got the contract.

775
00:51:00,266 --> 00:51:02,226
His bid was 6000 under mine.

776
00:51:02,309 --> 00:51:03,894
Six thousand.

777
00:51:05,479 --> 00:51:08,399
Well, he owns all his own equipment
and I don't.

778
00:51:11,819 --> 00:51:13,612
It's hell to be poor and hired out.

779
00:51:15,698 --> 00:51:20,077
Well, I have got some fried chicken here,
prepared by Christian women,

780
00:51:20,160 --> 00:51:21,537
a bottle of cheap wine,

781
00:51:21,620 --> 00:51:25,165
and I've arranged
for some pretty incredible fireworks.

782
00:51:27,334 --> 00:51:28,836
Oh, come on, Spud.

783
00:51:28,919 --> 00:51:33,299
I don't wanna miss the Nativity made
entirely out of sparklers.

784
00:51:34,842 --> 00:51:38,637
- I don't feel much like it.
- Well, you will once we get there.

785
00:51:40,222 --> 00:51:41,974
I'm happy where I am.

786
00:51:43,642 --> 00:51:44,685
Spud.

787
00:51:46,270 --> 00:51:49,064
We always watch the fireworks.

788
00:51:49,148 --> 00:51:51,859
<i>Whoa, that's the ball game. Final score...</i>

789
00:51:51,942 --> 00:51:57,489
This is KPPD radio,
station of choice in Chinquapin Parish,

790
00:51:57,573 --> 00:52:01,368
coming to you live
from the Devils' locker room.

791
00:52:01,452 --> 00:52:06,040
This is Bark Boone
with color announcer Clairee Belcher.

792
00:52:06,123 --> 00:52:07,708
Thank you, Bark.

793
00:52:07,791 --> 00:52:11,253
You know, Bark, it's a shame
our listeners can't be here

794
00:52:11,337 --> 00:52:14,506
to see the gorgeous new Devil uniforms.

795
00:52:15,799 --> 00:52:17,051
They're lovely.

796
00:52:17,134 --> 00:52:20,346
I myself would never have chosen
those white pants. They're filthy.

797
00:52:20,429 --> 00:52:23,849
I would've gone with a darker color.
White shows everything.

798
00:52:23,932 --> 00:52:27,061
Just look at those grass stains.
Impossible to get out.

799
00:52:27,144 --> 00:52:30,230
It's hard to keep white clean
when you're tackled.

800
00:52:30,314 --> 00:52:33,400
But I love the tops.
Such a vibrant purple.

801
00:52:33,484 --> 00:52:36,445
Bark, would you call this color
grape or aubergine?

802
00:52:36,528 --> 00:52:37,946
Shut up!

803
00:52:38,030 --> 00:52:39,156
What?

804
00:52:39,239 --> 00:52:41,867
You're making
a fool out of yourself, Clairee.

805
00:52:41,950 --> 00:52:44,578
- I am not!
- This is football.

806
00:52:44,662 --> 00:52:47,956
All the people wanna hear about
is touchdowns and injuries.

807
00:52:48,040 --> 00:52:50,167
They don't give a damn
about that grape shit.

808
00:52:51,001 --> 00:52:54,421
We have this new psychiatrist
that comes in two days a week.

809
00:52:54,505 --> 00:52:57,508
Of course, I pick her name
out of the grab bag.

810
00:52:57,591 --> 00:53:00,761
I've gotta pick something up for her
tomorrow. Would you put that on the list?

811
00:53:01,679 --> 00:53:05,307
I have no idea what to get your father.

812
00:53:06,141 --> 00:53:07,976
What's Jackson giving you? Do you know?

813
00:53:09,937 --> 00:53:10,937
Furniture.

814
00:53:12,064 --> 00:53:13,816
Furniture? Well, my.

815
00:53:14,483 --> 00:53:17,236
Must be nice to be married
to a rich lawyer.

816
00:53:18,737 --> 00:53:20,072
What's it for, the living room?

817
00:53:21,657 --> 00:53:22,950
No, for the nursery.

818
00:53:27,621 --> 00:53:30,082
We wanted to tell you
when you and Daddy were together,

819
00:53:30,165 --> 00:53:34,211
but you're never together,
so it's every man for himself.

820
00:53:36,422 --> 00:53:37,589
I'm pregnant.

821
00:53:40,843 --> 00:53:42,052
I realise that.

822
00:53:45,848 --> 00:53:47,057
Well, is that it?

823
00:53:48,809 --> 00:53:50,102
Is that all you're gonna say?

824
00:53:51,603 --> 00:53:53,564
What do you want me to say?

825
00:53:54,815 --> 00:53:57,317
Well, something along the lines
of "congratulations".

826
00:54:00,237 --> 00:54:01,613
Congratulations.

827
00:54:13,792 --> 00:54:15,794
Would it be too much to ask...

828
00:54:18,088 --> 00:54:19,631
for a little excitement?

829
00:54:19,715 --> 00:54:22,634
Not too much. I wouldn't want you
to break a sweat or anything.

830
00:54:28,599 --> 00:54:29,767
It's in July.

831
00:54:34,354 --> 00:54:35,481
Oh, Mama.

832
00:54:37,107 --> 00:54:38,734
You have to help me plan.

833
00:54:41,111 --> 00:54:42,863
We're gonna get a new house.

834
00:54:42,946 --> 00:54:45,157
Jackson and I are going
house hunting next week.

835
00:54:46,241 --> 00:54:48,076
Jackson loves to hunt for anything.

836
00:54:48,160 --> 00:54:52,122
- What does Jackson say about all this?
- He's so excited.

837
00:54:53,332 --> 00:54:55,709
He says he doesn't care
whether it's a boy or a girl,

838
00:54:55,793 --> 00:54:59,421
but I know he really wants a son
so bad he can taste it.

839
00:55:01,215 --> 00:55:02,758
He's cute about the whole thing.

840
00:55:02,841 --> 00:55:05,511
It's all he can talk about.
"Jackson Latcherie, Jr."

841
00:55:05,594 --> 00:55:06,970
Does he ever listen?

842
00:55:07,554 --> 00:55:10,349
I mean, when doctors
and specialists give you advice,

843
00:55:10,432 --> 00:55:11,975
does he listen?

844
00:55:12,059 --> 00:55:13,894
I know you never do. Does he?

845
00:55:19,233 --> 00:55:20,234
What?

846
00:55:23,779 --> 00:55:27,282
I guess since he doesn't have to carry
the baby, it isn't any of his concern.

847
00:55:27,366 --> 00:55:28,367
Mama.

848
00:55:30,869 --> 00:55:32,746
I want a child.

849
00:55:32,830 --> 00:55:35,666
What about adoption?
You filled out all the applications.

850
00:55:35,749 --> 00:55:40,420
Mama, no judge is going to give a baby
to someone with my medical record.

851
00:55:43,549 --> 00:55:45,759
Jackson even put out feelers
about buying one.

852
00:55:45,843 --> 00:55:47,511
People do it all the time.

853
00:55:50,138 --> 00:55:51,431
Listen to me.

854
00:55:53,809 --> 00:55:55,894
I want a child of my own.

855
00:56:00,399 --> 00:56:02,276
I think it would help things a lot.

856
00:56:12,411 --> 00:56:13,537
I see.

857
00:56:27,050 --> 00:56:28,677
Mama, you worry too much.

858
00:56:30,637 --> 00:56:31,805
In fact, I never worry

859
00:56:31,889 --> 00:56:34,725
'cause I always know
you're worried enough for both of us.

860
00:56:40,981 --> 00:56:43,525
Jackson and I have given this
a lot of thought.

861
00:56:43,609 --> 00:56:46,069
Has he really?
Well, there's a first time for everything.

862
00:56:46,153 --> 00:56:47,571
Don't start on Jackson, Mama.

863
00:56:47,654 --> 00:56:49,948
Your poor body has been through so much.

864
00:56:50,032 --> 00:56:51,992
Why would you deliberately
do this to yourself?

865
00:56:52,075 --> 00:56:54,119
Diabetics have healthy babies
all the time.

866
00:56:54,202 --> 00:56:55,913
You are special, Shelby.

867
00:56:56,955 --> 00:56:59,207
There are limits to what you can do.

868
00:57:06,840 --> 00:57:08,300
I am going to be...

869
00:57:09,593 --> 00:57:11,345
very, very careful.

870
00:57:12,387 --> 00:57:15,474
Nobody's gonna be hurt or disappointed

871
00:57:15,557 --> 00:57:17,225
or even inconvenienced.

872
00:57:17,976 --> 00:57:20,228
Least of all Jackson, I'm sure.

873
00:57:24,691 --> 00:57:25,901
You're jealous.

874
00:57:27,069 --> 00:57:29,655
Because you no longer have
a say-so in what I do

875
00:57:29,738 --> 00:57:32,074
and that drives you up the wall.

876
00:57:33,200 --> 00:57:36,703
You're ready to spit nails
because you can't call the shots.

877
00:57:38,205 --> 00:57:41,208
I did not raise my daughter
to talk to me like this.

878
00:57:44,336 --> 00:57:46,088
- Yes, you did.
- Oh, no, I didn't.

879
00:57:46,922 --> 00:57:50,092
Whenever any of us asked you what
you wanted for us when we grew up,

880
00:57:50,175 --> 00:57:51,259
what did you say?

881
00:57:51,343 --> 00:57:53,011
I'm not in the mood to play games.

882
00:57:53,095 --> 00:57:56,014
Just tell me what you said, Mama.
What did you say?

883
00:57:56,098 --> 00:57:58,892
The only thing I've ever said to you
is that I want you to be happy.

884
00:57:58,976 --> 00:57:59,977
Okay.

885
00:58:01,269 --> 00:58:04,940
The one thing that would make me happy
is to have a baby.

886
00:58:05,899 --> 00:58:08,986
If I could adopt one, I would,
but I can't.

887
00:58:11,154 --> 00:58:15,283
I'm going to have a baby,
and I wish you'd be happy too.

888
00:58:16,118 --> 00:58:17,869
I'll tell you what I wish.

889
00:58:19,913 --> 00:58:21,540
I don't know what I wish.

890
00:58:25,460 --> 00:58:28,547
Mama, I don't know why you have
to make everything so difficult.

891
00:58:31,508 --> 00:58:35,012
I look at having this baby
as the opportunity of a lifetime.

892
00:58:35,846 --> 00:58:38,849
Sure, there may be risk involved.
That's true for anybody.

893
00:58:40,434 --> 00:58:42,811
But you get through it and life goes on.

894
00:58:43,520 --> 00:58:46,332
And when it's all said and done,
there'll be a little piece of immortality

895
00:58:46,356 --> 00:58:49,609
with Jackson's good looks
and my sense of style, I hope.

896
00:58:51,278 --> 00:58:52,320
Please.

897
00:58:52,404 --> 00:58:53,488
Please.

898
00:58:55,407 --> 00:58:56,867
I need your support.

899
00:58:59,745 --> 00:59:02,873
I would rather have 30 minutes
of wonderful

900
00:59:02,956 --> 00:59:05,083
than a lifetime of nothing special.

901
00:59:22,309 --> 00:59:26,772
Okay. All right, I'm gonna hand it to you.
I don't wanna hit you upside the head.

902
00:59:26,855 --> 00:59:29,274
- Okay, I got one hole left.
- Great.

903
00:59:30,067 --> 00:59:33,487
Put the cords behind the pole. I don't
want them to show. It'll look tacky.

904
00:59:33,570 --> 00:59:35,614
I know. You told me about 40 times.

905
00:59:39,367 --> 00:59:40,786
Annelle, did you do all this?

906
00:59:40,869 --> 00:59:42,412
Guilty.

907
00:59:42,496 --> 00:59:46,208
Truvy just turned over
the decoration responsibility to me.

908
00:59:46,291 --> 00:59:50,837
I went to the fire sale at the Baptist
Bookstore in Shreveport last week.

909
00:59:50,921 --> 00:59:54,257
They had mismatched manger scenes
at incredibly low prices.

910
00:59:54,341 --> 00:59:58,512
I cleaned them out of baby Jesuses,
which I made into ornaments.

911
00:59:58,595 --> 01:00:01,431
- She's ready to roll.
- Shelby, would you do the honors?

912
01:00:05,227 --> 01:00:07,896
- Here you are, Mrs Latcherie.
- Thanks, Sammy.

913
01:00:08,897 --> 01:00:09,898
Ready?

914
01:00:15,320 --> 01:00:17,405
Annelle, it's wonderful!

915
01:00:17,489 --> 01:00:18,865
It works!

916
01:00:18,949 --> 01:00:21,493
How cute!

917
01:00:21,576 --> 01:00:24,830
I think your elves have gone berserk.

918
01:00:24,913 --> 01:00:27,874
Well, Shelby, I wasn't expecting
to see you here today.

919
01:00:27,958 --> 01:00:29,042
What can I do for you?

920
01:00:29,126 --> 01:00:31,795
I'm running a special.
It's called a Christmas Quickie.

921
01:00:31,878 --> 01:00:33,547
Miss Truvy, I'm beyond help.

922
01:00:33,630 --> 01:00:36,091
Last week, I discovered
the early stages of crow's feet.

923
01:00:36,174 --> 01:00:37,717
Honey, time marches on,

924
01:00:37,801 --> 01:00:40,804
and eventually you realise
it's marching across your face.

925
01:00:40,887 --> 01:00:42,889
- Stop it.
- Oh, no.

926
01:00:42,973 --> 01:00:44,516
It's Miss Ouiser.

927
01:00:48,854 --> 01:00:52,023
I'm supposed to give her a pedicure today.

928
01:00:52,107 --> 01:00:54,067
I hate working on her feet.

929
01:00:54,151 --> 01:00:57,946
It could've been worse.
She could've wanted a bikini waxing.

930
01:00:58,530 --> 01:01:01,449
- Let's not get graphic.
- Why not?

931
01:01:01,533 --> 01:01:04,202
Miss Ouiser, I met an old friend of yours.

932
01:01:05,412 --> 01:01:06,746
Owen Jenkins.

933
01:01:08,081 --> 01:01:11,543
Owen. Now, there's a blast from the past.

934
01:01:11,626 --> 01:01:13,420
Do you remember him? He remembers you.

935
01:01:13,503 --> 01:01:14,796
Of course, I remember him.

936
01:01:14,880 --> 01:01:17,132
He had the longest nose hair
in the free world.

937
01:01:17,215 --> 01:01:20,177
Well, he doesn't now.
He hardly has any hair anywhere.

938
01:01:20,260 --> 01:01:23,013
Owen's been gone from Chinquapin Parish
since God was a boy.

939
01:01:23,096 --> 01:01:24,514
I'd forgotten he ever existed.

940
01:01:24,598 --> 01:01:27,392
Now he lives in Monroe
and goes to First Presbyterian.

941
01:01:27,475 --> 01:01:30,687
When he found out where I was from,
he asked me if I knew you.

942
01:01:30,770 --> 01:01:32,981
He used to live in Ohio somewhere.

943
01:01:33,064 --> 01:01:36,151
His wife just died recently,
and he's moved back down here.

944
01:01:37,944 --> 01:01:39,654
Does this story have a point?

945
01:01:39,738 --> 01:01:43,491
No, not really.
He just remembers you fondly, I think.

946
01:01:43,575 --> 01:01:46,703
I can't imagine why.
He was not a bad fellow.

947
01:01:46,786 --> 01:01:51,082
But I managed to run him off and marry
the first of two total deadbeats.

948
01:01:51,166 --> 01:01:53,686
Well, maybe sometime I could arrange
for us all to get together.

949
01:01:54,586 --> 01:01:56,880
- Maybe not.
- Well, why not?

950
01:01:56,963 --> 01:01:59,799
Shelby, I managed, in a few decades,

951
01:01:59,883 --> 01:02:02,427
to marry the two most worthless men
in the universe

952
01:02:02,510 --> 01:02:07,140
and then proceeded to have the three
most ungrateful children ever conceived.

953
01:02:07,224 --> 01:02:12,020
The only reason people are nice to me is
because I have more money than God.

954
01:02:12,103 --> 01:02:14,773
Now, I'm not about to open
a new can of worms.

955
01:02:15,398 --> 01:02:17,400
- Ouiser.
- What?

956
01:02:18,026 --> 01:02:20,445
If this is really how you feel,
it isn't healthy.

957
01:02:20,528 --> 01:02:21,928
Maybe you should think about coming

958
01:02:21,988 --> 01:02:24,991
down to the guidance center and talking
to someone. We're there to help.

959
01:02:25,575 --> 01:02:27,702
I'm not crazy, M'Lynn.

960
01:02:27,786 --> 01:02:31,289
I've just been in a very bad mood
for 40 years.

961
01:02:33,333 --> 01:02:35,877
- Hi.
- Merry Christmas.

962
01:02:35,961 --> 01:02:38,421
- Hi! Merry Christmas.
- Merry Christmas.

963
01:02:38,505 --> 01:02:40,465
Look at you. Is that new?

964
01:02:40,548 --> 01:02:43,426
Well, I made the dress
with my own two hands.

965
01:02:43,510 --> 01:02:45,845
I just threw the rest of it together.

966
01:02:45,929 --> 01:02:48,431
The only thing that separates us
from the animals

967
01:02:48,515 --> 01:02:51,226
is our ability to accessorize.

968
01:02:52,477 --> 01:02:54,229
Annelle, why are you so late?

969
01:02:54,312 --> 01:02:58,066
Did you and Sammy get tangled up
in the tinsel?

970
01:02:58,149 --> 01:03:00,485
Truvy. You kill me.

971
01:03:00,568 --> 01:03:02,529
- Merry Christmas.
- Thank you.

972
01:03:02,612 --> 01:03:04,572
- Merry Christmas to you.
- Oh, darling.

973
01:03:04,656 --> 01:03:05,865
I have to tell you,

974
01:03:05,949 --> 01:03:09,244
your nephew Marshall is a little piece
of heaven right here on earth.

975
01:03:09,327 --> 01:03:10,954
They're family and I love them,

976
01:03:11,037 --> 01:03:14,708
but they do look like they've all been
carved out of cream cheese.

977
01:03:17,752 --> 01:03:21,631
Clairee, I'm surprised at you
talking about your kin that way.

978
01:03:21,715 --> 01:03:23,591
As somebody always said:

979
01:03:23,675 --> 01:03:27,762
"if you can't say anything nice
about anybody, come sit by me."

980
01:03:27,846 --> 01:03:28,930
That's a good one.

981
01:03:33,226 --> 01:03:34,436
- Miss Ouiser?
- What?

982
01:03:34,519 --> 01:03:37,314
- There's somebody that wants to see you.
- Who?

983
01:03:37,397 --> 01:03:39,649
I've opened the can of worms for you.

984
01:03:39,733 --> 01:03:40,734
What?

985
01:03:43,236 --> 01:03:44,571
Hell.

986
01:03:44,654 --> 01:03:45,947
Owen Jenkins.

987
01:03:46,031 --> 01:03:48,742
Hello, Louisa. Remember me?

988
01:03:49,534 --> 01:03:52,454
My God, you look different.
Have you shrunk?

989
01:03:54,581 --> 01:03:55,707
You look terrific.

990
01:03:56,499 --> 01:03:58,043
You've hardly changed at all.

991
01:03:58,752 --> 01:04:00,754
I'm not as sweet as I used to be.

992
01:04:11,806 --> 01:04:14,100
I cannot believe Shelby did that.

993
01:04:14,184 --> 01:04:17,270
Owen. After all these years.

994
01:04:17,354 --> 01:04:19,939
I'm not sure
I can be gracious under pressure.

995
01:04:20,023 --> 01:04:22,400
Shelby does a lot of things
I can't believe.

996
01:04:23,401 --> 01:04:25,445
M'Lynn, what's wrong with you
these days?

997
01:04:25,528 --> 01:04:27,447
You got a reindeer up your butt?

998
01:04:27,530 --> 01:04:29,157
Everybody.

999
01:04:29,240 --> 01:04:32,077
- Tommy, get all these people outside.
- Come on, everybody.

1000
01:04:32,160 --> 01:04:34,704
- My dad's gonna say something.
- Everybody. Come on.

1001
01:04:35,455 --> 01:04:39,167
Quiet down. I just want a moment
of your time, folks, now.

1002
01:04:41,503 --> 01:04:42,879
Today, my daughter...

1003
01:04:43,922 --> 01:04:45,840
told me a big secret.

1004
01:04:45,924 --> 01:04:47,592
- Daddy...
- Now, don't worry, honey.

1005
01:04:47,675 --> 01:04:50,428
I'm not gonna tell them you're pregnant,
I'm just gonna tell them...

1006
01:04:53,223 --> 01:04:56,059
I'm just gonna tell them
I'm gonna be a granddaddy.

1007
01:04:56,851 --> 01:04:58,895
That's wonderful.

1008
01:05:06,486 --> 01:05:09,155
- Grandma!
- Congratulations.

1009
01:05:09,239 --> 01:05:10,782
Well, ain't you excited?

1010
01:05:10,865 --> 01:05:14,035
Smile, it increases your face value.

1011
01:05:14,119 --> 01:05:16,621
And the doctor said
Shelby couldn't have children.

1012
01:05:16,704 --> 01:05:19,332
Yeah, what do they know?
I guess she showed them.

1013
01:05:19,416 --> 01:05:22,794
The doctor said she shouldn't
have children. There's a big difference.

1014
01:05:23,962 --> 01:05:26,881
This baby is not exactly great news.

1015
01:05:26,965 --> 01:05:29,467
To Jackson and Shelby.

1016
01:05:34,431 --> 01:05:39,477
Well, M'Lynn, I really wish I had
some words of wisdom, but I don't.

1017
01:05:39,561 --> 01:05:42,897
So why don't we just focus
on the joy of the situation?

1018
01:05:44,065 --> 01:05:45,442
It'll be fine.

1019
01:05:45,984 --> 01:05:47,277
Absolutely.

1020
01:05:49,279 --> 01:05:51,364
You know what they say:

1021
01:05:51,448 --> 01:05:54,701
"That which does not kill us
makes us stronger."

1022
01:06:02,834 --> 01:06:05,879
Nothing pleases Shelby more
than proving me wrong.

1023
01:06:14,471 --> 01:06:17,390
Oh, and to my new grandbaby.

1024
01:06:17,474 --> 01:06:20,393
May he be as good-looking as I am.

1025
01:06:46,544 --> 01:06:49,631
Go ahead, blow it out, buddy.
Go ahead, blow it out. Blow it out.

1026
01:06:49,714 --> 01:06:50,965
Blow.

1027
01:06:51,049 --> 01:06:54,260
- This is boring as hell.
- You only have your first birthday once.

1028
01:06:54,344 --> 01:06:57,514
- Little buddy's making a wish.
- I wish he'd just blow out the candle.

1029
01:06:57,597 --> 01:06:59,432
I can't stand this.

1030
01:06:59,516 --> 01:07:01,851
- Don't you dare.
- Hey, come on.

1031
01:07:01,935 --> 01:07:04,479
- Come on, buddy. Look. Look.
- Come on, here we go.

1032
01:07:04,562 --> 01:07:06,564
- One, two, three.
- One, two, three.

1033
01:07:10,818 --> 01:07:12,195
Happy birthday.

1034
01:07:14,030 --> 01:07:18,243
So I'll be back from Truvy's
in about an hour. Anything you want?

1035
01:07:19,536 --> 01:07:20,787
I think I'll come with you.

1036
01:07:21,663 --> 01:07:24,082
I wanna get my hair cut. Short.

1037
01:07:24,832 --> 01:07:27,794
And I want Truvy to do it.
It's so much easier to take care of.

1038
01:07:27,877 --> 01:07:30,713
I'd love to be able to just run
my fingers through it and go.

1039
01:07:32,757 --> 01:07:34,342
I think that would be precious.

1040
01:07:36,219 --> 01:07:39,347
I feel the need to make things
as simple as possible.

1041
01:07:39,430 --> 01:07:40,807
Let me go tell Jackson.

1042
01:07:51,025 --> 01:07:54,612
Shelby. Shelby,
I just can't seem to find the wipes.

1043
01:07:54,696 --> 01:07:56,864
They're in my bag. Is he wet?

1044
01:07:56,948 --> 01:07:58,908
No, he's muddy.

1045
01:07:58,992 --> 01:08:02,203
Miss Clairee, finish about your nephew.
Get to the good stuff.

1046
01:08:02,287 --> 01:08:04,789
- Well, I have to admit...
- Help.

1047
01:08:04,872 --> 01:08:07,667
...Marshall did go about it the wrong way.

1048
01:08:07,750 --> 01:08:09,586
He marched in,

1049
01:08:09,669 --> 01:08:12,338
and without so much as a hello, he said:

1050
01:08:12,422 --> 01:08:15,091
"Mama and Daddy,
I have something to tell you.

1051
01:08:15,174 --> 01:08:19,220
I have a brain tumor.
I have three months to live."

1052
01:08:19,304 --> 01:08:22,515
Well, naturally,
Drew and Belle became hysterical.

1053
01:08:22,599 --> 01:08:26,978
Then he said,
"Hey, folks, I'm only kidding.

1054
01:08:27,061 --> 01:08:28,396
I'm just gay."

1055
01:08:28,479 --> 01:08:31,232
That was his idea
of breaking the news gently?

1056
01:08:31,316 --> 01:08:33,776
Marshall was always very theatrical.

1057
01:08:33,860 --> 01:08:37,155
I wonder what Drew and Belle
must be feeling about all of this.

1058
01:08:37,238 --> 01:08:42,368
I don't know. They have considered
themselves a model family for so long.

1059
01:08:42,452 --> 01:08:46,331
First Nancy Beth dethroned
from her Miss Merry Christmas title

1060
01:08:46,414 --> 01:08:49,459
because of that unfortunate motel thing.

1061
01:08:49,542 --> 01:08:52,962
What motel thing?
I don't live here anymore, remember?

1062
01:08:53,046 --> 01:08:58,134
Nancy Beth was discovered in a local motel
with a high political official.

1063
01:08:58,217 --> 01:09:02,305
They were both high. They'd been
smoking everything but their shoes.

1064
01:09:02,388 --> 01:09:04,515
She's the first Miss Merry Christmas
in history

1065
01:09:04,599 --> 01:09:08,186
to be caught with her tinsel
down around her knees.

1066
01:09:09,062 --> 01:09:13,816
Well, speaking of drawers,
hang on to yours. Ta-da!

1067
01:09:26,954 --> 01:09:28,331
Oh, gosh.

1068
01:09:28,414 --> 01:09:30,249
Oh, you don't like it.

1069
01:09:31,042 --> 01:09:34,837
- Well, I did what you asked me, didn't I?
- Oh, yes, Truvy. You did a beautiful job.

1070
01:09:36,506 --> 01:09:37,840
Well, it's just that...

1071
01:09:39,842 --> 01:09:41,511
Sweetheart, don't.

1072
01:09:41,594 --> 01:09:43,680
Please don't cry or I will too.

1073
01:09:43,763 --> 01:09:47,892
I have a strict policy
that nobody cries alone in my presence.

1074
01:09:48,810 --> 01:09:49,852
I love it.

1075
01:09:52,772 --> 01:09:53,772
Yeah.

1076
01:09:59,946 --> 01:10:00,988
Okay.

1077
01:10:03,324 --> 01:10:06,661
Well, now, Truvy, let's do my nails.

1078
01:10:06,744 --> 01:10:10,623
This is a treat. Nobody around here
ever wants a manicure.

1079
01:10:10,707 --> 01:10:14,585
Why, I don't think I would even know
what to charge for a full day's beauty.

1080
01:10:14,669 --> 01:10:16,546
Well, I'm gonna need one too.

1081
01:10:16,629 --> 01:10:21,259
Well, I am gonna paint my front door red
and change my name to Elizabeth Arden.

1082
01:10:23,261 --> 01:10:24,303
Amen.

1083
01:10:25,722 --> 01:10:26,973
Amen.

1084
01:10:28,599 --> 01:10:31,018
Annelle, I'm gonna need
some more cuticle oil.

1085
01:10:31,102 --> 01:10:32,942
- Is it still next to...? Okay.
- Second shelf.

1086
01:10:35,022 --> 01:10:36,858
- Was she praying?
- Yes.

1087
01:10:36,941 --> 01:10:38,735
- Why?
- Got me.

1088
01:10:38,818 --> 01:10:41,404
Maybe she was praying
for Marshall and Drew and Belle.

1089
01:10:41,487 --> 01:10:44,073
Maybe she was praying for us
'cause we were gossiping.

1090
01:10:44,157 --> 01:10:47,326
Maybe she was praying because
the elastic is shot in her pantyhose.

1091
01:10:47,410 --> 01:10:50,288
Who knows? She prays
at the drop of a hat these days.

1092
01:10:50,371 --> 01:10:53,040
- How long has she been this way?
- Since Mardi Gras.

1093
01:10:53,124 --> 01:10:56,836
She had her choice of going to a Bible
weekend with her Sunday school class

1094
01:10:56,919 --> 01:11:00,089
or to New Orleans with me
and two other sinners.

1095
01:11:00,173 --> 01:11:03,050
- What does her boyfriend have to say?
- Sammy's so confused,

1096
01:11:03,134 --> 01:11:06,012
he don't know whether
to scratch his watch or wind his butt.

1097
01:11:06,679 --> 01:11:09,140
He says he could deal
with another man in her life,

1098
01:11:09,223 --> 01:11:12,977
but he's having trouble with the Father,
the Son and the Holy Ghost.

1099
01:11:16,939 --> 01:11:20,234
- Does Marshall have, you know, friends?
- This way.

1100
01:11:20,318 --> 01:11:22,320
Well, we discussed that.

1101
01:11:22,403 --> 01:11:26,240
I asked him how he met people.

1102
01:11:26,324 --> 01:11:29,243
In my day, you could tell
by a man's carriage and demeanor

1103
01:11:29,327 --> 01:11:33,706
which side his bread was buttered on.
But in this day and age, who knows?

1104
01:11:33,790 --> 01:11:37,210
I asked Marshall, "How can you tell?"

1105
01:11:37,293 --> 01:11:41,339
And he said,
"All gay men have track lighting.

1106
01:11:41,422 --> 01:11:44,342
And all gay men are named
Mark, Rick or Steve."

1107
01:11:45,593 --> 01:11:48,221
Be a soft-spoken dog.

1108
01:11:48,304 --> 01:11:49,514
Morning.

1109
01:11:49,597 --> 01:11:51,516
- Oh, Clairee.
- What's so funny in there?

1110
01:11:51,599 --> 01:11:55,102
Clairee's just been telling us
this true story of track lighting.

1111
01:11:55,186 --> 01:11:57,104
Oh, I love mine.

1112
01:11:58,022 --> 01:12:00,066
Highlights my new artwork.

1113
01:12:00,900 --> 01:12:03,361
Since when do you have track lighting?

1114
01:12:04,111 --> 01:12:07,740
About three weeks.
It's in the foyer up the staircase.

1115
01:12:07,824 --> 01:12:09,492
My grandson's idea.

1116
01:12:10,493 --> 01:12:12,411
I haven't seen him in ages.

1117
01:12:12,495 --> 01:12:14,872
- How is he?
- Steve's fine.

1118
01:12:18,084 --> 01:12:20,753
Shelby. Oh, God.

1119
01:12:20,837 --> 01:12:22,713
Your hair is so short.

1120
01:12:22,797 --> 01:12:25,967
Ouiser, you're almost chipper.
Why are you in such a good mood?

1121
01:12:26,050 --> 01:12:27,969
Did you run over a small child
or something?

1122
01:12:28,052 --> 01:12:30,930
- Tomatoes.
- Don't give all these to me.

1123
01:12:31,013 --> 01:12:32,932
Somebody's gotta take them.
I hate them.

1124
01:12:33,015 --> 01:12:36,102
I try not to eat healthy food
if I can possibly help it.

1125
01:12:36,769 --> 01:12:39,856
The sooner my body gives out,
the better off I'll be.

1126
01:12:39,939 --> 01:12:42,441
I can't get enough grease into my diet.

1127
01:12:42,525 --> 01:12:46,070
- Then why do you grow them?
- Because I'm an old Southern woman.

1128
01:12:46,153 --> 01:12:49,031
And we're supposed to wear
funny-looking hats and ugly clothes

1129
01:12:49,115 --> 01:12:50,658
and grow vegetables in the dirt.

1130
01:12:53,995 --> 01:12:58,374
Don't ask me those questions.
I don't know why. I don't make the rules.

1131
01:13:02,336 --> 01:13:04,255
Oh, now, that's attractive, Ouiser.

1132
01:13:08,801 --> 01:13:09,969
Shelby.

1133
01:13:11,596 --> 01:13:14,098
Oh, honey, what have you done to yourself?

1134
01:13:14,181 --> 01:13:15,933
It doesn't hurt.

1135
01:13:16,017 --> 01:13:18,936
M'Lynn, have you seen this?

1136
01:13:21,188 --> 01:13:22,523
Yes, I have.

1137
01:13:23,441 --> 01:13:25,610
The doctor's trying
to strengthen my veins.

1138
01:13:25,693 --> 01:13:29,071
- They're in terrible shape.
- My God.

1139
01:13:29,155 --> 01:13:32,742
Shelby, it looks like you been
driving nails up your arms.

1140
01:13:33,409 --> 01:13:34,952
What is going on?

1141
01:13:36,162 --> 01:13:37,413
Shall we tell them, Mama?

1142
01:13:42,293 --> 01:13:44,962
Well, I guess we can't keep it
a secret any longer.

1143
01:13:46,464 --> 01:13:48,883
Shelby has been driving nails up her arm.

1144
01:13:50,843 --> 01:13:54,221
It's my dialysis. It's no big thing.

1145
01:13:56,724 --> 01:13:58,267
Don't look at me like that.

1146
01:13:58,351 --> 01:14:00,811
Having Jack Jr put too much strain
on my kidneys

1147
01:14:00,895 --> 01:14:02,939
and now they're kaput, that's all.

1148
01:14:03,022 --> 01:14:05,274
The doctor said
this would probably happen.

1149
01:14:05,983 --> 01:14:07,610
That's all?

1150
01:14:07,693 --> 01:14:09,695
"That's all", she says.

1151
01:14:09,779 --> 01:14:12,740
Do you do this dialysis forever?

1152
01:14:12,823 --> 01:14:16,202
Well, I could, I suppose.
But it's not real convenient

1153
01:14:16,285 --> 01:14:18,120
when you're trying
to keep up with Jack Jr.

1154
01:14:18,204 --> 01:14:20,581
So I'll have a kidney transplant
and I'll be fine.

1155
01:14:20,665 --> 01:14:22,917
- Is it that easy?
- Sure.

1156
01:14:23,000 --> 01:14:26,337
They do them all the time in Shreveport.
Three or four a week.

1157
01:14:26,420 --> 01:14:30,257
They do. Our Sunday school class was
just praying for one the other day.

1158
01:14:30,341 --> 01:14:33,427
But the hard part is finding the kidney,
isn't it?

1159
01:14:33,511 --> 01:14:37,556
I saw something about it on TV.
Very dramatic.

1160
01:14:37,640 --> 01:14:41,644
These medical teams fly all over the place
taking hearts and kidneys

1161
01:14:41,727 --> 01:14:43,229
and who knows what else.

1162
01:14:43,312 --> 01:14:44,981
You know what impressed me the most?

1163
01:14:45,064 --> 01:14:48,609
- They carry those organs in beer coolers.
- Oh, stop it.

1164
01:14:48,693 --> 01:14:51,070
Those doctors take out their six-packs,

1165
01:14:51,153 --> 01:14:54,407
throw in some dry ice and a heart,
and get on a plane.

1166
01:14:54,490 --> 01:14:56,951
How long do you have to wait for one?

1167
01:14:57,618 --> 01:15:00,454
Well, there are people on dialysis
that have been waiting for years.

1168
01:15:01,539 --> 01:15:03,249
That must be agony.

1169
01:15:03,332 --> 01:15:07,920
Well, I suppose. But I'm lucky.
I don't have to wait anymore.

1170
01:15:10,214 --> 01:15:12,299
Mama's gonna give me one of her kidneys.

1171
01:15:15,011 --> 01:15:17,763
- When?
- We check in tomorrow morning.

1172
01:15:27,857 --> 01:15:29,608
So you better get going on my nails.

1173
01:15:30,693 --> 01:15:33,029
- Annelle, I'm dripping.
- I'm sorry.

1174
01:15:35,656 --> 01:15:37,658
I shouldn't have said that.

1175
01:15:37,742 --> 01:15:38,826
Said what?

1176
01:15:39,702 --> 01:15:41,078
Back at Truvy's.

1177
01:15:41,162 --> 01:15:44,081
I said I'd be better off
when my body wears out.

1178
01:15:44,999 --> 01:15:47,126
I shouldn't have said that
in front of Shelby.

1179
01:15:47,835 --> 01:15:49,545
And I didn't mean that.

1180
01:15:49,628 --> 01:15:52,381
Ouiser, nobody pays any attention to you.

1181
01:15:54,008 --> 01:15:55,718
But I feel bad, Clairee.

1182
01:15:56,635 --> 01:15:58,179
I'm a terrible person.

1183
01:15:59,263 --> 01:16:00,306
No, you're not.

1184
01:16:01,474 --> 01:16:04,143
You'd give your dog a kidney
if he needed one.

1185
01:16:05,770 --> 01:16:06,771
Yes.

1186
01:16:15,196 --> 01:16:17,907
Clairee. This is just a gesture.

1187
01:16:17,990 --> 01:16:20,576
We're not feeding Drum
till the end of time.

1188
01:16:20,659 --> 01:16:23,412
Drum loves pork and beans.
He eats them with everything.

1189
01:16:25,039 --> 01:16:26,499
That explains a lot.

1190
01:16:27,792 --> 01:16:30,795
You're supposed to soak
the red beans overnight.

1191
01:16:31,796 --> 01:16:34,131
But we don't have overnight.

1192
01:16:34,215 --> 01:16:37,510
I wanted to take it to them before
they leave for the hospital tomorrow.

1193
01:16:37,593 --> 01:16:40,846
- Well, let's cook something else.
- I already bought all the stuff.

1194
01:16:40,930 --> 01:16:43,724
And it's in the "Freezes Beautifully"
section of my cookbook.

1195
01:16:43,808 --> 01:16:46,477
I wanna take something
that freezes beautifully.

1196
01:16:46,560 --> 01:16:48,771
Then we'll make red beans and rice.

1197
01:16:53,400 --> 01:16:56,362
Sammy Dwayne Desoto,
what is this in my Frigidaire?

1198
01:16:58,572 --> 01:16:59,573
Beer.

1199
01:17:02,243 --> 01:17:04,328
I don't care what you do
in your refrigerator,

1200
01:17:04,411 --> 01:17:06,622
but you will not keep liquor in mine.

1201
01:17:09,375 --> 01:17:12,336
Oh, Annelle, for Christ's sakes.

1202
01:17:13,212 --> 01:17:14,213
Who?

1203
01:17:15,214 --> 01:17:16,257
Christ.

1204
01:17:18,092 --> 01:17:19,218
Who did you say?

1205
01:17:19,301 --> 01:17:20,886
Christ, Christ, Christ.

1206
01:17:21,554 --> 01:17:25,391
Are you speaking of our Lord?
Is that whose name you're taking in vain?

1207
01:17:25,474 --> 01:17:26,559
That's the one.

1208
01:17:28,018 --> 01:17:32,439
I am sorry, Sammy, but I'm not about
to spend the next 50 years of my life

1209
01:17:32,523 --> 01:17:35,067
with someone who I'm not gonna
run into in the hereafter.

1210
01:17:35,151 --> 01:17:36,652
Oh, Annelle, goddamn it.

1211
01:17:37,403 --> 01:17:38,779
I think we should pray.

1212
01:17:40,114 --> 01:17:41,740
Oh, I'd rather eat dirt.

1213
01:17:44,577 --> 01:17:47,371
Shelby says
her half of the operation's easy.

1214
01:17:47,454 --> 01:17:49,165
I guess M'Lynn's is terrible.

1215
01:17:49,790 --> 01:17:52,835
They basically have to saw her in half
to get the kidney out.

1216
01:17:52,918 --> 01:17:57,006
Yeah? Well, they do it
on <i>Circus of the Stars</i> all the time.

1217
01:17:57,089 --> 01:17:59,967
Don't joke about it, Spud.

1218
01:18:00,050 --> 01:18:01,635
I feel awful for them.

1219
01:18:02,803 --> 01:18:03,929
Yeah, well...

1220
01:18:06,640 --> 01:18:08,434
I guess the Eatentons are lucky.

1221
01:18:09,226 --> 01:18:11,562
They all know how much
they mean to each other.

1222
01:18:13,480 --> 01:18:14,940
Maybe I'm jealous.

1223
01:18:15,024 --> 01:18:17,443
Hand me that socket wrench, would you?

1224
01:18:17,526 --> 01:18:20,863
- Which one's a socket wrench?
- The socket wrench.

1225
01:18:20,946 --> 01:18:22,907
- This funny-looking thing?
- Yeah.

1226
01:18:22,990 --> 01:18:24,116
Thank you.

1227
01:18:33,209 --> 01:18:34,543
That's not funny.

1228
01:18:34,627 --> 01:18:37,922
Okay, okay, no more transplant jokes.
Daddy doesn't like them.

1229
01:18:38,005 --> 01:18:39,131
Whose turn is it?

1230
01:18:39,924 --> 01:18:43,052
Mama, give me all your...

1231
01:18:43,135 --> 01:18:44,386
internal organs.

1232
01:18:45,846 --> 01:18:47,181
I mean, aces.

1233
01:18:48,182 --> 01:18:50,100
- Dad, I'm sorry.
- Yeah.

1234
01:18:50,184 --> 01:18:51,602
It just slipped out.

1235
01:18:51,685 --> 01:18:52,895
Go fish.

1236
01:18:54,188 --> 01:18:55,856
I'm gonna put this little one to bed.

1237
01:18:55,940 --> 01:18:58,901
- Oh, Mama, I'll do it.
- No, no, no, let me.

1238
01:18:58,984 --> 01:19:01,987
After tomorrow, it'll be a long time
before I can pick him up again.

1239
01:19:02,071 --> 01:19:03,989
Well, so much for the card game.

1240
01:19:04,073 --> 01:19:05,532
- Let's see a movie.
- Movie!

1241
01:19:05,616 --> 01:19:07,409
Yes. Old and black-and-white.

1242
01:19:07,493 --> 01:19:10,329
- Nothing dirty there.
- Oh, I got it. A classic.

1243
01:19:10,412 --> 01:19:12,039
<i>A Tale of Two Kidneys.</i>

1244
01:19:15,334 --> 01:19:17,086
- You think that's funny?
- Yes, I do.

1245
01:19:18,045 --> 01:19:19,213
That's not funny.

1246
01:19:21,423 --> 01:19:24,385
I overslept 'cause I was up late cooking.

1247
01:19:24,468 --> 01:19:26,929
I've gotta get these beans
to the Eatentons.

1248
01:19:27,012 --> 01:19:32,268
And it's my Sunday to count the offering
and I just know I'm gonna miss church.

1249
01:19:32,351 --> 01:19:35,604
Annelle, cool down.
I'm gonna have to turn the hose on you.

1250
01:19:35,688 --> 01:19:39,191
- I just don't know what I'm gonna do.
- Well, I know what you're gonna do.

1251
01:19:39,275 --> 01:19:41,485
You are gonna get in this car,

1252
01:19:41,568 --> 01:19:44,738
and we're gonna drop that pot of beans
off at the Eatenton house.

1253
01:19:45,948 --> 01:19:47,908
Then you are going to church with me.

1254
01:19:47,992 --> 01:19:49,994
Oh, I don't know.

1255
01:19:50,077 --> 01:19:53,706
Oh, honey, God don't care which church
you go to, as long as you show up.

1256
01:20:36,999 --> 01:20:40,586
- Ouiser, what brings you here?
- Shut up.

1257
01:20:40,669 --> 01:20:43,964
I was just wondering how things were
with you and Owen.

1258
01:20:45,257 --> 01:20:48,427
I can report
that the Sherwood Florist delivery truck

1259
01:20:48,510 --> 01:20:51,889
stops by her house at least twice a week.

1260
01:20:51,972 --> 01:20:53,932
He knows I like fresh flowers.

1261
01:20:54,016 --> 01:20:56,977
And I can report that a strange car

1262
01:20:57,061 --> 01:21:00,397
is parked in her garage
at least once a week.

1263
01:21:01,607 --> 01:21:04,276
There. My secret is out.

1264
01:21:04,360 --> 01:21:07,738
I am having an affair
with a Mercedes-Benz.

1265
01:21:08,280 --> 01:21:11,158
We are in the house of the Lord.

1266
01:21:11,241 --> 01:21:12,868
Oh, like she cares.

1267
01:21:12,951 --> 01:21:16,121
Ouiser's never done
a religious thing in her life.

1268
01:21:16,872 --> 01:21:18,457
Now, that is not true.

1269
01:21:18,540 --> 01:21:21,377
When I was in school,
a bunch of my friends and I

1270
01:21:21,460 --> 01:21:24,088
would dress up as nuns and go bar-hopping.

1271
01:21:26,548 --> 01:21:30,052
Ouiser, forgive me,
but I just been dying to ask you this.

1272
01:21:30,135 --> 01:21:32,137
Are you and Owen, you know...?

1273
01:21:33,305 --> 01:21:36,767
Wait, wait, wait.
I have to get a mental picture of this.

1274
01:21:37,810 --> 01:21:40,562
A dirty mind is a terrible thing to waste.

1275
01:21:40,646 --> 01:21:41,897
Well?

1276
01:21:41,980 --> 01:21:45,067
Not that this is any
of anyone else's business,

1277
01:21:45,150 --> 01:21:47,236
but no. We're friends.

1278
01:21:47,319 --> 01:21:50,197
He would like more,
and I am dealing with that.

1279
01:21:50,280 --> 01:21:52,199
But I am old and set in my ways.

1280
01:21:52,282 --> 01:21:54,660
You are playing hard to get.

1281
01:21:54,743 --> 01:21:57,204
At her age,
she should be playing Beat the Clock.

1282
01:21:59,081 --> 01:22:02,376
- Miss DeLord, is 240 on telemetry?
<i>- Yes, he is.</i>

1283
01:22:02,459 --> 01:22:03,502
Thank you.

1284
01:22:07,131 --> 01:22:10,300
- May I help you?
<i>- Could somebody fix my IV, please?</i>

1285
01:22:10,384 --> 01:22:11,969
Someone will be there in a minute.

1286
01:22:13,303 --> 01:22:15,973
- Wendy. Check 240's IV.
- Sure.

1287
01:22:24,148 --> 01:22:25,691
<i>Rodriguez, dial 7-4.</i>

1288
01:22:25,774 --> 01:22:28,318
<i>Dr Rodriguez, dial 7-4, please.</i>

1289
01:22:57,639 --> 01:23:01,935
I really do. I think, despite everything,
we have a very good result.

1290
01:23:07,024 --> 01:23:10,235
Looks good. Looks real, real good.

1291
01:23:13,572 --> 01:23:14,656
Thanks.

1292
01:23:35,093 --> 01:23:36,470
Surprise!

1293
01:23:39,139 --> 01:23:40,432
I can't believe this.

1294
01:23:40,516 --> 01:23:44,311
I have always wanted to give
a wedding shower with a monster motif.

1295
01:23:44,394 --> 01:23:47,105
That's what you get
for getting married on Halloween.

1296
01:23:48,482 --> 01:23:51,276
- My heart.
- Come on, let's open the gifts.

1297
01:23:51,360 --> 01:23:52,945
You're welcome. Next.

1298
01:23:53,028 --> 01:23:55,948
M'Lynn, appliqué.

1299
01:23:56,031 --> 01:23:59,201
With some little fringe on them
and some appliqué.

1300
01:23:59,284 --> 01:24:00,786
Quiet down. Quiet down.

1301
01:24:00,869 --> 01:24:03,705
It says, "Better late than never."

1302
01:24:05,207 --> 01:24:07,000
Look out, Sammy.

1303
01:24:08,210 --> 01:24:10,337
- Who's that from?
- It's not signed.

1304
01:24:10,420 --> 01:24:11,588
Here, let me see. Let me see.

1305
01:24:13,423 --> 01:24:15,342
- Ouiser.
- What?

1306
01:24:16,134 --> 01:24:18,720
I'd recognise
this penmanship anywhere.

1307
01:24:18,804 --> 01:24:21,348
You have the handwriting
of a serial killer.

1308
01:24:22,140 --> 01:24:25,477
Annelle, I just thought Sammy wouldn't
mind you reading the Bible in bed,

1309
01:24:25,561 --> 01:24:28,146
as long as you were wearing
something inspirational.

1310
01:24:28,230 --> 01:24:29,314
Yuck, yuck, yuck.

1311
01:24:30,232 --> 01:24:32,025
Put down "split-crotch panties...

1312
01:24:32,109 --> 01:24:34,570
- This is from Shelby.
- That's disgusting.

1313
01:24:34,653 --> 01:24:37,614
She's awful sorry she couldn't be here.
She's on duty.

1314
01:24:37,698 --> 01:24:39,533
- How is she?
- Fine.

1315
01:24:39,616 --> 01:24:42,911
- I fed baby Renz, but I haven't fed Alex.
- Oh, okay.

1316
01:24:42,995 --> 01:24:45,497
- Gotta get home now for Halloween.
- Have a good evening.

1317
01:24:46,331 --> 01:24:50,335
Shelby, this is too cute.
Now, where did you find it?

1318
01:24:50,419 --> 01:24:53,839
Aunt Fern made it. I can't wait
to get home and try it on Jack.

1319
01:24:53,922 --> 01:24:56,683
I think I even taught him how to say
"trick or treat", or something...

1320
01:24:58,719 --> 01:25:00,262
Something kind of like it.

1321
01:25:01,513 --> 01:25:03,098
Could you hand me that bag, Pam?

1322
01:25:07,853 --> 01:25:09,104
- Thanks.
- Good night.

1323
01:25:09,187 --> 01:25:10,188
Good night.

1324
01:25:13,650 --> 01:25:14,901
- Here you go.
- Thank you.

1325
01:25:14,985 --> 01:25:17,738
If this don't work on my husband,
you can come back later.

1326
01:25:17,821 --> 01:25:19,323
- Yes, ma'am. Thank you.
- See you.

1327
01:25:20,741 --> 01:25:23,535
Looks like somebody's husband's
coming home tonight.

1328
01:25:23,619 --> 01:25:27,039
Well, when you work a seven-day stretch
on an offshore oil rig,

1329
01:25:27,122 --> 01:25:29,499
all you wanna do
on your day off is sleep.

1330
01:25:29,583 --> 01:25:33,128
But I'm gonna do everything I can
to keep him up.

1331
01:25:33,211 --> 01:25:35,631
Anne Boleyn had six fingers.

1332
01:25:35,714 --> 01:25:37,341
Who's Anne Berlin?

1333
01:25:38,008 --> 01:25:41,887
Anne Boleyn. She was one
of the six wives of Henry VI I I.

1334
01:25:41,970 --> 01:25:44,806
Oh, well, I never watch public television.

1335
01:25:44,890 --> 01:25:47,476
She had six fingers.

1336
01:25:47,559 --> 01:25:49,978
Well, what happened to the other four?

1337
01:25:50,062 --> 01:25:52,189
She had 11 total.

1338
01:25:53,148 --> 01:25:55,525
Are you trying to confuse me, Clairee?

1339
01:25:55,609 --> 01:26:00,947
No! I just want to expose us
to a little more culture.

1340
01:26:01,031 --> 01:26:04,534
And that's not easy to come by
in this neck of the woods.

1341
01:26:04,618 --> 01:26:06,036
Hey, Ouiser,

1342
01:26:06,119 --> 01:26:09,915
how about taking a theatre trip
to New York?

1343
01:26:09,998 --> 01:26:12,376
I don't wanna expose myself to anything.

1344
01:26:12,459 --> 01:26:14,211
You should broaden your horizons.

1345
01:26:14,294 --> 01:26:18,674
You broaden your horizons your way,
and I will broaden my horizons mine.

1346
01:26:18,757 --> 01:26:21,051
I'm going to support the arts
in this area.

1347
01:26:21,134 --> 01:26:24,471
I'll write a check. I support art.
I just don't have to see it.

1348
01:26:24,554 --> 01:26:26,056
It wouldn't harelip you.

1349
01:26:26,765 --> 01:26:29,935
Clairee, can I get one thing
straight with you?

1350
01:26:30,018 --> 01:26:34,314
I do not see plays
because I can nap at home for free.

1351
01:26:34,398 --> 01:26:39,236
I don't see movies because they're trash
and got nothing but naked people in them.

1352
01:26:39,319 --> 01:26:41,655
And I don't read books
'cause if they're any good,

1353
01:26:41,738 --> 01:26:43,490
they make them into a miniseries.

1354
01:26:43,573 --> 01:26:47,619
You would be a much more contented,
pleasant person

1355
01:26:47,703 --> 01:26:50,956
if you would find ways
to occupy your time.

1356
01:26:51,039 --> 01:26:52,708
I am pleasant.

1357
01:26:52,791 --> 01:26:56,169
Damn it. I just saw Drum Eatenton
this morning at the Piggly-Wiggly,

1358
01:26:56,253 --> 01:26:59,881
and I smiled at the son of a bitch
before I could help myself.

1359
01:27:04,261 --> 01:27:06,888
I'm sorry, Miss... I'm sorry, Miss Ouiser.

1360
01:27:06,972 --> 01:27:10,767
Annelle, you take your Bible
and shove it where the sun doesn't shine.

1361
01:27:13,478 --> 01:27:15,355
Put it in Mommy's pocket.

1362
01:27:15,439 --> 01:27:16,940
There we go.

1363
01:27:17,023 --> 01:27:21,111
And we'll zip you up, and we'll go
trick-or-treating right after dinner.

1364
01:27:21,194 --> 01:27:23,321
Let's go in and make some spaghetti.

1365
01:27:24,573 --> 01:27:26,283
Oh, Jack. Jack.

1366
01:27:29,703 --> 01:27:30,787
Okay.

1367
01:27:31,663 --> 01:27:32,664
Okay.

1368
01:27:34,166 --> 01:27:35,834
Yeah. Yes.

1369
01:27:36,960 --> 01:27:38,545
Yeah. Let's go...

1370
01:27:40,505 --> 01:27:43,216
Let's go call Daddy, okay?

1371
01:27:46,845 --> 01:27:47,846
Shelby?

1372
01:27:48,930 --> 01:27:50,307
Darling, I'm home.

1373
01:27:55,604 --> 01:27:56,605
Shelby?

1374
01:27:58,064 --> 01:27:59,441
What's the matter, pal?

1375
01:28:00,942 --> 01:28:03,862
What? What's the matter?

1376
01:28:03,945 --> 01:28:05,197
What's the matter?

1377
01:28:06,239 --> 01:28:07,282
Shelby.

1378
01:28:10,994 --> 01:28:12,037
Shelby!

1379
01:28:13,079 --> 01:28:16,082
Okay, buddy. Okay, okay. All right.

1380
01:28:16,166 --> 01:28:17,250
Shelby.

1381
01:28:18,126 --> 01:28:20,921
Oh, my God.
Okay, baby, just wait right here.

1382
01:28:22,672 --> 01:28:23,799
Shelby? Baby?

1383
01:28:24,633 --> 01:28:25,717
Shelby?

1384
01:28:39,815 --> 01:28:42,192
I wish we could offer you more hope,

1385
01:28:42,275 --> 01:28:46,238
but the situation is very, very serious.

1386
01:28:47,656 --> 01:28:52,577
The suppressive therapy we have given her
to prevent rejection of the kidney

1387
01:28:52,661 --> 01:28:54,246
has overgrown resistance.

1388
01:28:55,413 --> 01:28:59,459
We believe she has contracted an infection
of the central nervous system,

1389
01:28:59,543 --> 01:29:02,128
which is very difficult to resolve.

1390
01:29:03,129 --> 01:29:06,424
The truth is,
the coma may be irreversible.

1391
01:29:43,920 --> 01:29:46,172
- Good morning.
- Good morning, Gladys.

1392
01:29:46,256 --> 01:29:48,133
We're doing our Jane Fonda.

1393
01:29:48,216 --> 01:29:50,218
The exercises are good for her.

1394
01:29:53,013 --> 01:29:54,723
Here's the one
where you're holding him.

1395
01:29:55,849 --> 01:29:57,976
You're looking at him
and he's looking at you,

1396
01:29:58,059 --> 01:30:00,270
and then y'all looked over at me.
Remember?

1397
01:30:01,354 --> 01:30:03,315
Open your eyes, Shelby.
Open your eyes.

1398
01:30:03,398 --> 01:30:04,858
Open your eyes. Look at him.

1399
01:30:05,817 --> 01:30:09,613
He wants you to open your eyes, Shelby.
He wants you to open... Open your eyes.

1400
01:30:17,329 --> 01:30:19,247
Pulse is unchanged.

1401
01:30:21,708 --> 01:30:23,919
Some flow noted in the AD fistula.

1402
01:30:26,254 --> 01:30:29,215
- It's weaker.
- Yeah. Radial pulse is weaker.

1403
01:30:29,299 --> 01:30:32,093
Subdermal, pedal pulse is unchanged.

1404
01:30:51,029 --> 01:30:52,113
Excuse me.

1405
01:30:56,785 --> 01:30:57,953
"Lesson Three:

1406
01:30:59,037 --> 01:31:03,375
Never be afraid to try a brave new look.

1407
01:31:04,626 --> 01:31:06,503
Now, that could mean wearing...

1408
01:31:07,379 --> 01:31:08,838
Daring to wear...

1409
01:31:10,715 --> 01:31:14,469
a sexy slip of a dress that bares..."

1410
01:31:20,350 --> 01:31:22,519
Honey, it'll do you good
to get out for a while.

1411
01:31:23,395 --> 01:31:24,854
Eat a real dinner.

1412
01:31:29,985 --> 01:31:32,487
What if she wakes up for two minutes
and I'm not here?

1413
01:31:37,367 --> 01:31:38,493
"For example,

1414
01:31:39,953 --> 01:31:42,998
we know where you can get
a top-of-the-line hairstyle..."

1415
01:33:57,924 --> 01:33:59,217
Call Clairee.

1416
01:34:01,553 --> 01:34:04,013
Call Connolly's Funeral Home.
That's the nicest.

1417
01:34:10,687 --> 01:34:11,688
Jackson?

1418
01:34:14,732 --> 01:34:16,651
You're gonna have to get her pink suit.

1419
01:34:18,570 --> 01:34:21,156
The one with the little red cherries
on the lapel.

1420
01:34:24,909 --> 01:34:26,161
Where's Jack Jr?

1421
01:34:27,162 --> 01:34:28,288
Aunt Fern's.

1422
01:35:14,584 --> 01:35:15,835
There's your grandma.

1423
01:35:27,722 --> 01:35:30,308
- There you go.
- Pumpkin.

1424
01:35:34,604 --> 01:35:35,688
Yes.

1425
01:36:01,297 --> 01:36:03,675
{\an8}Does this tie go?

1426
01:36:07,011 --> 01:36:08,179
Yeah.

1427
01:36:11,057 --> 01:36:12,267
You look real nice.

1428
01:36:14,227 --> 01:36:16,729
Thought I'd come with you to the funeral,
if you don't mind.

1429
01:36:17,981 --> 01:36:19,065
I don't mind.

1430
01:36:33,496 --> 01:36:35,415
I feel sorry for them, you know?

1431
01:36:36,958 --> 01:36:38,626
I mean, especially Jackson.

1432
01:36:41,087 --> 01:36:42,880
Losing Shelby like that.

1433
01:36:48,136 --> 01:36:50,336
Something like that
ever happened to me, I don't know...

1434
01:36:52,932 --> 01:36:54,434
I don't know what I'd do.

1435
01:37:00,898 --> 01:37:04,068
A thing like this
just doesn't make any sense.

1436
01:37:05,611 --> 01:37:06,946
No sense at all.

1437
01:37:08,614 --> 01:37:10,950
I just keep thinking
about what Annelle says.

1438
01:37:11,034 --> 01:37:14,120
"The Lord works in mysterious ways."

1439
01:37:15,913 --> 01:37:17,707
What the hell's this for?

1440
01:37:19,667 --> 01:37:20,960
It makes you pretty.

1441
01:38:17,225 --> 01:38:18,267
Come here.

1442
01:39:17,618 --> 01:39:18,619
Hey.

1443
01:39:19,620 --> 01:39:20,913
Come on home, honey.

1444
01:39:38,431 --> 01:39:40,057
How you holding up, honey?

1445
01:39:43,394 --> 01:39:44,437
I'm fine.

1446
01:39:46,230 --> 01:39:48,774
It was a beautiful service.

1447
01:39:48,858 --> 01:39:52,862
The flowers were the most
beautiful flowers I have ever seen.

1448
01:39:53,863 --> 01:39:55,156
They were beautiful.

1449
01:39:58,701 --> 01:39:59,744
Miss M'Lynn...

1450
01:40:01,621 --> 01:40:05,458
it should make you feel a lot better
that Shelby is with her king.

1451
01:40:08,336 --> 01:40:10,296
Yes, Annelle, I guess it should.

1452
01:40:11,464 --> 01:40:14,634
- We should all be rejoicing.
- Well, you go on ahead.

1453
01:40:14,717 --> 01:40:17,845
I'm sorry if I don't feel like it.
I guess I'm a little selfish.

1454
01:40:17,929 --> 01:40:19,347
I'd rather have her here.

1455
01:40:22,683 --> 01:40:23,935
Miss M'Lynn...

1456
01:40:25,645 --> 01:40:28,439
I don't mean to upset you by saying that.

1457
01:40:30,525 --> 01:40:31,901
It's just that...

1458
01:40:33,611 --> 01:40:35,738
when something like this happens...

1459
01:40:36,906 --> 01:40:40,201
I pray very hard
to make heads or tails of it.

1460
01:40:41,118 --> 01:40:43,704
And I think that in Shelby's case,

1461
01:40:43,788 --> 01:40:46,874
she just wanted to take care
of that little baby,

1462
01:40:47,625 --> 01:40:51,379
and of you, of everybody she knew.

1463
01:40:51,462 --> 01:40:54,048
And her poor little body
was just worn out.

1464
01:40:55,341 --> 01:40:58,928
It just wouldn't let her do
all the things she wanted to.

1465
01:40:59,929 --> 01:41:03,432
So she went on to a place
where she could be

1466
01:41:03,516 --> 01:41:05,268
a guardian angel.

1467
01:41:06,435 --> 01:41:08,813
She will always be young.

1468
01:41:08,896 --> 01:41:10,856
She will always be beautiful.

1469
01:41:11,816 --> 01:41:16,070
And I personally feel much safer
knowing that she's up there on my side.

1470
01:41:19,240 --> 01:41:22,493
It may sound real simple and stupid,

1471
01:41:23,744 --> 01:41:27,748
and, well, maybe I am, but that's
how I get through things like this.

1472
01:41:32,461 --> 01:41:33,754
Thank you, Annelle.

1473
01:41:39,135 --> 01:41:40,344
I appreciate that.

1474
01:41:42,388 --> 01:41:44,265
And it's a real good idea.

1475
01:41:46,058 --> 01:41:49,270
Shelby, as you know, wouldn't want us
to get mired down and wallow in this.

1476
01:41:50,187 --> 01:41:52,982
We should handle it
the best way we know how

1477
01:41:53,065 --> 01:41:54,317
and get on with it.

1478
01:41:56,068 --> 01:41:57,653
That's what my mind says.

1479
01:42:00,281 --> 01:42:02,491
I wish somebody would explain it
to my heart.

1480
01:42:03,659 --> 01:42:06,245
Drum says you never left her side
for a second.

1481
01:42:06,746 --> 01:42:07,830
No.

1482
01:42:09,248 --> 01:42:10,958
I couldn't leave my Shelby.

1483
01:42:12,251 --> 01:42:13,336
I just sat there

1484
01:42:13,419 --> 01:42:17,423
and kept on pushing the way I always have
where Shelby was concerned.

1485
01:42:19,467 --> 01:42:22,011
I was hoping she'd sit up
and argue with me.

1486
01:42:24,555 --> 01:42:26,891
And finally we realised there was no hope.

1487
01:42:30,227 --> 01:42:31,729
We turned off the machines.

1488
01:42:33,773 --> 01:42:35,608
Drum left. He couldn't take it.

1489
01:42:36,901 --> 01:42:38,277
Jackson left.

1490
01:42:41,447 --> 01:42:42,823
I find it amusing.

1491
01:42:44,200 --> 01:42:46,535
Men are supposed to be made
out of steel or something.

1492
01:42:50,247 --> 01:42:51,624
But I just sat there.

1493
01:42:54,418 --> 01:42:56,170
I just held Shelby's hand.

1494
01:42:59,674 --> 01:43:01,092
There was no noise.

1495
01:43:02,718 --> 01:43:03,844
No tremble.

1496
01:43:05,179 --> 01:43:07,348
Just peace.

1497
01:43:10,476 --> 01:43:11,644
Oh, God.

1498
01:43:13,104 --> 01:43:14,438
I realise,

1499
01:43:14,522 --> 01:43:16,982
as a woman, how lucky I am.

1500
01:43:18,734 --> 01:43:23,531
I was there when that wonderful creature
drifted into my life.

1501
01:43:24,448 --> 01:43:26,951
And I was there when she drifted out.

1502
01:43:27,034 --> 01:43:30,037
It was the most precious moment
of my life.

1503
01:43:37,962 --> 01:43:39,296
I gotta get back.

1504
01:43:40,047 --> 01:43:41,632
Has anybody got a mirror?

1505
01:43:41,716 --> 01:43:43,467
Does anybody have a mirror?

1506
01:43:45,219 --> 01:43:47,763
I don't know how you're doing
on the inside, honey,

1507
01:43:47,847 --> 01:43:49,890
but your hair's just holding up beautiful.

1508
01:43:54,979 --> 01:43:56,397
Shelby was right.

1509
01:43:59,316 --> 01:44:01,235
This is a brown football helmet.

1510
01:44:02,361 --> 01:44:04,864
- Honey, are you okay?
- I'm fine.

1511
01:44:04,947 --> 01:44:06,866
I'm fine. I'm fine.

1512
01:44:07,616 --> 01:44:08,993
I'm fine!

1513
01:44:11,454 --> 01:44:14,081
I could jog all the way to Texas and back,

1514
01:44:14,707 --> 01:44:16,751
but my daughter can't.

1515
01:44:17,668 --> 01:44:19,420
She never could.

1516
01:44:19,503 --> 01:44:22,757
God. I'm so mad,
I don't know what to do.

1517
01:44:22,840 --> 01:44:23,883
I wanna know why.

1518
01:44:23,966 --> 01:44:26,927
I wanna know why Shelby's life is over.

1519
01:44:27,011 --> 01:44:31,140
I wanna know how that baby will ever
know how wonderful his mother was.

1520
01:44:31,724 --> 01:44:34,518
Will he ever know
what she went through for him?

1521
01:44:35,311 --> 01:44:38,355
Oh, God, I wanna know why!

1522
01:44:38,439 --> 01:44:39,607
Why?

1523
01:44:40,608 --> 01:44:43,110
Lord, I wish I could understand.

1524
01:44:43,819 --> 01:44:46,530
No. No. No.

1525
01:44:46,614 --> 01:44:48,407
It's not supposed to happen this way.

1526
01:44:48,491 --> 01:44:51,452
I'm supposed to go first.
I've always been ready to go first.

1527
01:44:52,912 --> 01:44:54,789
I don't think I can take this.

1528
01:44:54,872 --> 01:44:56,749
I don't think I can take this.

1529
01:44:56,832 --> 01:44:59,877
I just wanna hit somebody
till they feel as bad as I do.

1530
01:44:59,960 --> 01:45:02,797
I just wanna hit something.
I wanna hit it hard!

1531
01:45:04,465 --> 01:45:05,466
Here.

1532
01:45:06,008 --> 01:45:07,009
Hit this.

1533
01:45:07,718 --> 01:45:09,720
Go ahead, M'Lynn. Slap her.

1534
01:45:09,804 --> 01:45:11,764
- Are you crazy?
- Hit her!

1535
01:45:11,847 --> 01:45:15,100
- Are you high, Clairee?
- Clairee, have you lost your mind?

1536
01:45:15,184 --> 01:45:19,104
We'll sell T-shirts saying,
"I Slapped Ouiser Boudreaux."

1537
01:45:19,188 --> 01:45:21,482
- Hit her!
- Miss Clairee, enough.

1538
01:45:22,233 --> 01:45:26,111
Ouiser, this is your chance
to do something for your fellow man.

1539
01:45:26,904 --> 01:45:30,282
- Knock her lights out, M'Lynn.
- Let go of me!

1540
01:45:30,366 --> 01:45:32,701
M'Lynn, you just missed
the chance of a lifetime.

1541
01:45:32,785 --> 01:45:36,288
Half of Chinquapin Parish would give
their eyeteeth to take a whack at Ouiser.

1542
01:45:46,799 --> 01:45:48,884
You are a pig from hell.

1543
01:45:53,681 --> 01:45:55,891
- Ouiser, don't leave.
- Ouiser.

1544
01:45:55,975 --> 01:45:58,060
Ouiser, I was just kidding. Come back!

1545
01:46:01,105 --> 01:46:04,775
Miss Clairee, that was not
a very Christian thing to do.

1546
01:46:05,359 --> 01:46:06,986
Annelle, you gotta lighten up.

1547
01:46:45,482 --> 01:46:46,859
Go away.

1548
01:46:46,942 --> 01:46:50,195
Okay, all right. Hit me, then.
I deserve it.

1549
01:46:50,279 --> 01:46:52,698
You are evil,
and you must be destroyed.

1550
01:46:52,781 --> 01:46:55,492
Mother Nature's taking care of that
faster than you could.

1551
01:46:56,118 --> 01:46:59,079
Things were getting entirely too serious
for a moment.

1552
01:46:59,163 --> 01:47:00,497
We needed to laugh.

1553
01:47:02,750 --> 01:47:04,793
I bet Lloyd got a kick out of it.

1554
01:47:06,045 --> 01:47:10,257
Lloyd got a great deal of enjoyment
at my expense when he was alive.

1555
01:47:10,341 --> 01:47:14,345
Ouiser, you know I love you
more than my luggage.

1556
01:47:24,438 --> 01:47:26,857
All right. Come on.

1557
01:47:27,733 --> 01:47:29,818
This is my bench.

1558
01:47:29,902 --> 01:47:31,779
Get off my bench.

1559
01:47:32,488 --> 01:47:35,074
Get off my... Good, now sit.

1560
01:47:35,157 --> 01:47:38,118
You are too twisted for color TV,
Clairee.

1561
01:47:39,703 --> 01:47:41,455
Have your roots done.

1562
01:47:47,252 --> 01:47:50,798
I shouldn't have gone on the way I did.
I made everybody cry. I'm sorry.

1563
01:47:50,881 --> 01:47:54,718
Don't be silly. Laughter through tears
is my favourite emotion.

1564
01:47:54,802 --> 01:47:55,803
Thanks, Annelle.

1565
01:47:56,345 --> 01:47:59,556
Maybe I should have
an emotional outburst more often.

1566
01:47:59,640 --> 01:48:01,892
Maybe I should start
having them at home.

1567
01:48:01,976 --> 01:48:03,852
Drum would be so pleased.

1568
01:48:07,815 --> 01:48:11,151
Well, I'm glad to see
the two of you made up.

1569
01:48:11,235 --> 01:48:13,737
Ouiser can never stay mad at me.

1570
01:48:13,821 --> 01:48:16,323
She worships the quicksand I walk on.

1571
01:48:20,536 --> 01:48:21,537
M'Lynn.

1572
01:48:22,287 --> 01:48:23,539
You're in my prayers.

1573
01:48:30,587 --> 01:48:32,548
Yes, Annelle, I pray.

1574
01:48:34,967 --> 01:48:38,137
Well, I do. There, I said it.
I hope you're satisfied.

1575
01:48:38,220 --> 01:48:40,597
I have suspected this all along.

1576
01:48:40,681 --> 01:48:44,601
Oh, well, don't you expect me
to come to one of your churches.

1577
01:48:44,685 --> 01:48:46,103
One of those tent revivals,

1578
01:48:46,186 --> 01:48:48,814
with all those Bible-beaters doing
God-only-knows-what.

1579
01:48:48,897 --> 01:48:50,816
They'd probably make me eat
a live chicken.

1580
01:48:51,900 --> 01:48:53,527
Not on your first visit.

1581
01:48:54,862 --> 01:48:56,822
Very good, Annelle.

1582
01:48:56,905 --> 01:48:59,116
Spoken like a true smart-ass.

1583
01:49:04,496 --> 01:49:07,458
What are you doing?
Are you eating my picture?

1584
01:49:07,541 --> 01:49:11,170
Well, Annelle doesn't want me drinking
in the house.

1585
01:49:11,253 --> 01:49:13,922
- Then I guess we can't tell nobody.
- If you can believe that.

1586
01:49:18,510 --> 01:49:20,220
Let's get in the swing, shall we?

1587
01:49:20,846 --> 01:49:23,390
Get our feets in there. There we go.

1588
01:49:24,099 --> 01:49:26,769
Hold on. Hold on.

1589
01:49:27,519 --> 01:49:28,896
Hold on.

1590
01:49:32,483 --> 01:49:37,821
Miss M'Lynn, I don't know
if this is the right time or place,

1591
01:49:37,905 --> 01:49:39,740
but I wanted to tell you

1592
01:49:39,823 --> 01:49:42,910
that Sammy and I have decided
if this baby's a girl,

1593
01:49:42,993 --> 01:49:44,620
we'd like to name it Shelby

1594
01:49:45,496 --> 01:49:48,082
since she was the reason we met
in the first place.

1595
01:49:48,791 --> 01:49:50,292
If you don't mind.

1596
01:49:50,375 --> 01:49:51,585
Shelby would love that.

1597
01:49:53,796 --> 01:49:54,922
I'm tickled pink.

1598
01:49:58,467 --> 01:49:59,468
Pink.

1599
01:50:00,094 --> 01:50:03,472
Well, what are you gonna name it
if it happens to be a boy?

1600
01:50:04,723 --> 01:50:06,100
Shelby, I guess.

1601
01:50:07,267 --> 01:50:08,685
That's how it should be.

1602
01:50:09,561 --> 01:50:10,938
Life goes on.

1603
01:50:50,269 --> 01:50:53,021
I've never been so uncomfortable
in all my life.

1604
01:50:53,105 --> 01:50:56,275
We'll talk about uncomfortable
when you're nine months pregnant, okay?

1605
01:50:59,653 --> 01:51:02,656
Go on now, keep those eyes closed
or I'm gonna staple them shut.

1606
01:51:02,739 --> 01:51:04,616
- They're closed!
- Keep them closed.

1607
01:51:04,700 --> 01:51:06,160
Okay. Now?

1608
01:51:06,243 --> 01:51:07,452
- Ready?
- Yeah.

1609
01:51:10,080 --> 01:51:11,540
Keep them shut. Okay.

1610
01:51:11,623 --> 01:51:13,000
- Open them up.
- All right.

1611
01:51:16,128 --> 01:51:20,507
I don't believe it! I'm a chain! Oh, Spud.

1612
01:51:23,927 --> 01:51:25,596
- Jesus.
- Oh, lighten up.

1613
01:51:26,638 --> 01:51:29,183
Now, you just burst through
those bushes

1614
01:51:29,266 --> 01:51:31,810
and hop over
to where the kids are, okay?

1615
01:51:31,894 --> 01:51:34,438
What bushes? I can't see shit.

1616
01:51:34,521 --> 01:51:35,522
Over there.

1617
01:51:36,231 --> 01:51:37,691
"Over there".

1618
01:51:37,774 --> 01:51:40,152
I'm an adult, you know.
I'm not a 5-year-old.

1619
01:51:40,235 --> 01:51:44,072
On your mark, get set, go.

1620
01:51:44,156 --> 01:51:47,993
Okay, Jack Jr,
I'm gonna tell you a story.

1621
01:51:50,287 --> 01:51:54,041
Once upon a time,
there was a beautiful young gal

1622
01:51:54,124 --> 01:51:55,542
named Shelby.

1623
01:51:56,543 --> 01:52:01,924
And Shelby had a lovely, kind,
and wonderful good fairy

1624
01:52:02,007 --> 01:52:04,509
named Clairee.

1625
01:52:06,136 --> 01:52:08,680
But there was also a horrible,

1626
01:52:08,764 --> 01:52:13,143
evil, ugly witch named Ouiser.

1627
01:52:13,227 --> 01:52:15,812
I hate these stupid neighbourhood things.

1628
01:52:15,896 --> 01:52:18,190
No one's twisting your arm
to keep you here.

1629
01:52:18,273 --> 01:52:20,484
Well, I have to be sociable.

1630
01:52:22,819 --> 01:52:24,446
Hey, Rhett's here.

1631
01:52:26,865 --> 01:52:28,367
Let's connect the bald spots.

1632
01:52:29,076 --> 01:52:30,076
Drum.

1633
01:52:30,619 --> 01:52:31,870
Eat shit and die.

1634
01:52:32,579 --> 01:52:34,790
- Hello, M'Lynn.
- Ouiser. Owen.

1635
01:52:35,582 --> 01:52:37,459
Good to see you too, Ouiser, Owen.

1636
01:52:40,128 --> 01:52:42,005
Come on, Rhett! Kill, kill!

1637
01:52:42,089 --> 01:52:45,217
Quit it, Drum. Stop egging him on.

1638
01:52:48,553 --> 01:52:51,723
And everyone lived happily ever after.

1639
01:52:52,933 --> 01:52:56,687
And the nasty, wicked, evil, wretched,

1640
01:52:56,770 --> 01:52:59,773
horrible, mean Ouiser

1641
01:52:59,856 --> 01:53:01,692
was never heard from again.

1642
01:53:02,859 --> 01:53:06,071
Now, it's almost time
for the Easter Bunny.

1643
01:53:06,154 --> 01:53:07,281
Run on down.

1644
01:53:08,615 --> 01:53:09,616
Here.

1645
01:53:23,880 --> 01:53:25,716
Hi, Jack. You remember me?

1646
01:53:25,799 --> 01:53:27,384
It's your old pal Ouiser.

1647
01:53:30,929 --> 01:53:31,929
Jack!

1648
01:53:32,556 --> 01:53:34,099
Just a second. It's Jackson.

1649
01:53:34,182 --> 01:53:36,351
Jack, come here.

1650
01:53:44,693 --> 01:53:46,069
Oh, Jack.

1651
01:53:46,153 --> 01:53:47,404
Is he all right?

1652
01:53:47,988 --> 01:53:49,740
Yes, he's all right.

1653
01:53:59,458 --> 01:54:00,625
Truvy.

1654
01:54:02,085 --> 01:54:04,129
Oh, honey, it's okay. It's okay.

1655
01:54:04,212 --> 01:54:06,840
Women have babies every day. M'Lynn.

1656
01:54:06,923 --> 01:54:10,010
Jonathan, quick.
Get that Easter Bunny over here now.

1657
01:54:10,093 --> 01:54:12,137
- Hey, Tommy, where's Sam?
- He's over there.

1658
01:54:12,220 --> 01:54:14,348
- Excuse me.
- Why? What's going on?

1659
01:54:14,431 --> 01:54:16,892
What's...? Oh, my God!
She's gonna have a baby.

1660
01:54:16,975 --> 01:54:20,312
Go get a doctor. A doctor. Help! A doctor!

1661
01:54:20,395 --> 01:54:21,688
This way, this way.

1662
01:54:22,814 --> 01:54:24,358
This way, come on.

1663
01:54:24,441 --> 01:54:26,026
Here. Get her in.

1664
01:54:28,528 --> 01:54:31,156
We'll find Sammy. We'll find Sammy.

1665
01:54:31,239 --> 01:54:35,410
- It's all right, honey. We'll get Sammy.
- Easy. Easy, Spud. Easy.

1666
01:54:35,494 --> 01:54:36,870
Drive safely.

1667
01:54:39,247 --> 01:54:40,832
Bye, Annelle.

1668
01:54:48,840 --> 01:54:49,925
Come on, Sammy.

1669
01:54:51,718 --> 01:54:52,844
Get your tail hopping.