1
00:01:25,500 --> 00:01:27,668
Get your bag off the
table. People eat there.

2
00:01:28,248 --> 00:01:29,746
They eat on plates.

3
00:01:29,955 --> 00:01:31,584
Don't give me any crap, Maizy.

4
00:01:32,084 --> 00:01:33,832
I'm telling. You said "crap."

5
00:01:33,921 --> 00:01:35,670
There's nothing wrong with crap.

6
00:01:35,751 --> 00:01:37,668
Oh, really? I thought that was a swear.

7
00:01:38,248 --> 00:01:39,666
No. You're thinking of shit.

8
00:01:39,747 --> 00:01:41,046
Oh, right.

9
00:01:44,003 --> 00:01:45,921
Do you mind?

10
00:01:46,001 --> 00:01:47,590
A sixth grader chased me on his bike,

11
00:01:47,669 --> 00:01:48,838
and I was running.

12
00:01:48,918 --> 00:01:52,335
When I got exhausted and fell down,
he whaled me with his shoe.

13
00:01:52,755 --> 00:01:54,213
Thank your parents for that.

14
00:01:54,333 --> 00:01:57,041
- How come?
- It was their brilliant idea to move here.

15
00:01:57,131 --> 00:01:59,668
They weren't making
enough cash in Indianapolis.

16
00:01:59,748 --> 00:02:02,006
Forget that we were perfectly happy.

17
00:02:02,086 --> 00:02:04,174
So thank them for getting
treated like shit every day.

18
00:02:04,254 --> 00:02:06,082
I'm telling on that one.

19
00:02:06,252 --> 00:02:07,791
Shut your face.

20
00:02:13,046 --> 00:02:15,174
Your book bag doesn't go on the floor.

21
00:02:15,254 --> 00:02:17,082
Always have a cow.

22
00:02:18,591 --> 00:02:20,959
Your nails are digging
to my arm, God damn it!

23
00:02:21,048 --> 00:02:22,417
Pick it up.

24
00:02:24,006 --> 00:02:26,214
You're just supposed
to open the door for us.

25
00:02:26,294 --> 00:02:28,252
You're not supposed to kick us around.

26
00:02:28,342 --> 00:02:30,500
I'm an American, I have rights.

27
00:02:30,630 --> 00:02:32,258
Maizy, did I kick you around?

28
00:02:32,338 --> 00:02:34,546
No, but you said "shit" twice.

29
00:02:34,756 --> 00:02:36,254
But only once for real.

30
00:02:36,924 --> 00:02:40,341
I've got better things to do than
babysit you, you little stain.

31
00:02:40,420 --> 00:02:43,627
Like what? Hang out with
friends you don't have?

32
00:02:43,717 --> 00:02:46,085
Why don't you just shut up?

33
00:02:46,595 --> 00:02:48,213
Want to make me?

34
00:02:49,132 --> 00:02:53,219
When our mother figure
isn't here, I'm in charge.

35
00:02:54,218 --> 00:02:55,886
I'm sick of you calling her that!

36
00:02:55,966 --> 00:02:57,385
Too bad.

37
00:02:59,423 --> 00:03:00,752
You moron!

38
00:03:01,461 --> 00:03:03,339
I don't know why we need boys at all.

39
00:03:03,429 --> 00:03:04,838
They're so loud.

40
00:03:04,928 --> 00:03:05,927
Shut up!

41
00:03:06,007 --> 00:03:07,425
Shut up yourself!

42
00:03:07,595 --> 00:03:10,552
We need boys so they can grow up,

43
00:03:10,842 --> 00:03:13,260
get married, and turn into shadows.

44
00:03:16,137 --> 00:03:17,756
Let the dog out.

45
00:03:18,095 --> 00:03:19,754
Percy!

46
00:03:32,972 --> 00:03:35,378
This is such a wonderful dinner, Mother.

47
00:03:35,469 --> 00:03:37,427
How do you find the time?

48
00:03:40,924 --> 00:03:42,093
Miles.

49
00:03:43,472 --> 00:03:45,260
Maizy, put that down.

50
00:03:45,970 --> 00:03:47,678
Did you win in hockey yesterday?

51
00:03:48,098 --> 00:03:49,596
Hockey's been over for two weeks.

52
00:03:55,261 --> 00:03:58,508
I guess you don't want a
hockey stick for your birthday.

53
00:04:04,762 --> 00:04:06,261
You know what?

54
00:04:07,430 --> 00:04:11,925
When Dad goes to New York,
I'm going to take a week off work.

55
00:04:12,385 --> 00:04:14,343
So you can interview new housekeepers?

56
00:04:15,472 --> 00:04:17,430
I've had enough of your ugliness.

57
00:04:18,050 --> 00:04:19,428
- Oh, really?
- Mmm-hmm.

58
00:04:20,846 --> 00:04:23,764
We're all just a little tired of the act.

59
00:04:39,560 --> 00:04:41,178
This was a really good idea.

60
00:04:41,268 --> 00:04:42,427
Thank you.

61
00:04:43,346 --> 00:04:44,385
How's that pie?

62
00:04:44,475 --> 00:04:45,724
Not bad.

63
00:04:47,602 --> 00:04:49,600
You gonna be at work in the morning?

64
00:04:50,929 --> 00:04:52,598
I don't see how I can avoid it.

65
00:04:52,927 --> 00:04:54,975
You don't seem very happy about it.

66
00:04:55,595 --> 00:04:57,263
All right, if you gotta know,

67
00:04:58,103 --> 00:05:00,560
I'm really not that excited
about working for my girlfriend.

68
00:05:00,640 --> 00:05:02,638
There. I said it. It's out of the way.

69
00:05:03,388 --> 00:05:06,225
Okay, okay. Buck, I love you.
I can't help myself.

70
00:05:06,305 --> 00:05:08,053
I wanna get married,
I wanna have a family.

71
00:05:08,143 --> 00:05:09,602
I wanna do it with you.

72
00:05:09,682 --> 00:05:11,640
Well, you know, the clock
is ticking away here.

73
00:05:11,730 --> 00:05:15,516
I would just like to hear the
pitter-patter of tiny feet before I die.

74
00:05:15,596 --> 00:05:18,554
I'll get you a mouse
and a piece of sheet metal.

75
00:05:20,432 --> 00:05:21,601
Come on. Lighten up, will you?

76
00:05:21,681 --> 00:05:23,599
Don't push my button.
I'm not gonna get into this.

77
00:05:23,689 --> 00:05:25,307
I'm not pushing your buttons.

78
00:05:25,397 --> 00:05:27,685
I know me, I know what I like.

79
00:05:27,765 --> 00:05:31,272
All right? I like my
friends. I like my freedom.

80
00:05:31,851 --> 00:05:34,309
I like knowing I can throw my
sticks in the trunk of my car

81
00:05:34,389 --> 00:05:36,517
and go golfing anytime I want.

82
00:05:36,607 --> 00:05:39,144
I don't hurt anybody.
I don't see what the problem is.

83
00:05:39,224 --> 00:05:42,222
That's the best formula
for loneliness I ever heard.

84
00:05:42,681 --> 00:05:44,230
Why are we arguing?

85
00:05:44,310 --> 00:05:45,389
We're talking.

86
00:05:45,479 --> 00:05:48,106
I said I'd be at work in
the morning. I'll be there.

87
00:05:49,395 --> 00:05:50,474
Okay.

88
00:05:54,230 --> 00:05:56,348
I... I just gotta get this out.

89
00:05:56,438 --> 00:05:59,436
I mean, I know I'm harping on
something here, but, you know,

90
00:05:59,515 --> 00:06:01,184
just let me say it.
I mean, you know, I am...

91
00:06:01,274 --> 00:06:03,022
I'm working on history.
I'm working on the past.

92
00:06:03,102 --> 00:06:06,689
You're gonna show up for work, you
swear to God? In the a.m.? Promise?

93
00:06:06,769 --> 00:06:08,687
Chanice, I'll be honest with you,

94
00:06:08,767 --> 00:06:11,315
if I could think of an
excuse that you would buy,

95
00:06:11,394 --> 00:06:12,433
I'd use it.

96
00:06:27,809 --> 00:06:28,978
Hello.

97
00:06:33,444 --> 00:06:34,893
Oh, God.

98
00:06:35,022 --> 00:06:36,101
What?

99
00:06:36,231 --> 00:06:37,730
Just a second.

100
00:06:37,860 --> 00:06:40,188
It's your aunt. What happened?

101
00:06:40,937 --> 00:06:43,065
Your Dad had a heart attack.

102
00:06:47,271 --> 00:06:49,479
Who's going to watch the kids?

103
00:06:50,728 --> 00:06:53,316
Marcie. She's right across the street.

104
00:06:53,524 --> 00:06:56,193
She's the last person I'd ask for a favor.

105
00:06:58,191 --> 00:07:00,149
What about the Nevilles?

106
00:07:03,026 --> 00:07:04,695
Would you call them?

107
00:07:04,775 --> 00:07:07,193
I want to leave as soon as we can.

108
00:07:09,231 --> 00:07:11,109
I am so helpless here.

109
00:07:11,529 --> 00:07:14,945
Honey, now, don't start
getting down on why we moved.

110
00:07:15,445 --> 00:07:17,613
It has nothing to
do with what happened.

111
00:07:17,693 --> 00:07:18,862
Sorry.

112
00:07:21,779 --> 00:07:23,937
Now, this is just a thought.

113
00:07:24,107 --> 00:07:25,446
What about Buck?

114
00:07:25,526 --> 00:07:27,524
I'm sure he'd be glad to help out.

115
00:07:28,363 --> 00:07:30,651
This is not the time to discuss your brother.

116
00:07:30,731 --> 00:07:32,609
I don't want him here.

117
00:07:33,109 --> 00:07:34,357
It's just a suggestion.

118
00:07:34,447 --> 00:07:37,944
He doesn't have kids. He isn't
married. He doesn't even work!

119
00:07:39,942 --> 00:07:44,148
He's a little out there, but he's
responsible, and he's family.

120
00:07:44,448 --> 00:07:49,323
Buck isn't the kind of guy I feel
comfortable leaving my kids with.

121
00:07:49,823 --> 00:07:52,151
The trashy people he hangs out with.

122
00:07:52,241 --> 00:07:55,108
That woman who sells tires.

123
00:07:55,448 --> 00:07:57,985
The horse racing. The gambling.

124
00:07:58,065 --> 00:08:00,193
Can you see him in this house?

125
00:08:00,283 --> 00:08:01,322
Okay.

126
00:08:05,199 --> 00:08:06,857
Call the Nevilles.

127
00:08:11,613 --> 00:08:12,942
Are we going to Indianapolis?

128
00:08:14,320 --> 00:08:15,449
Daddy and I are.

129
00:08:16,618 --> 00:08:18,117
And we're not?

130
00:08:19,326 --> 00:08:21,484
No. I don't think
that would be a good idea.

131
00:08:24,451 --> 00:08:25,610
Thanks.

132
00:08:26,619 --> 00:08:28,657
I love my father very much.

133
00:08:29,196 --> 00:08:31,075
So why did you move away from him?

134
00:08:34,611 --> 00:08:36,360
If my whole family moved away from me,

135
00:08:36,449 --> 00:08:38,118
I'd have a heart attack, too.

136
00:08:44,912 --> 00:08:46,281
Oh, I see.

137
00:08:48,868 --> 00:08:50,077
Who gonna take care of us?

138
00:08:50,157 --> 00:08:51,286
Mr. and Mrs. Neville.

139
00:08:51,406 --> 00:08:53,943
Is that a joke?
You don't like the Nevilles?

140
00:08:54,203 --> 00:08:55,952
Their dog's a ball sniffer.

141
00:08:56,111 --> 00:08:57,620
Don't talk like that.

142
00:08:57,700 --> 00:08:59,738
Mr. Neville yelled at Michael Larson

143
00:08:59,828 --> 00:09:01,866
because the dog was
sniffing Michael's balls.

144
00:09:01,946 --> 00:09:02,945
Don't use that word.

145
00:09:03,035 --> 00:09:04,244
I don't know another word.

146
00:09:04,454 --> 00:09:06,782
Well, I'm sure we can talk
to Mr. Neville about the dog.

147
00:09:06,871 --> 00:09:09,619
Sorry, honey. They're in Florida.

148
00:09:12,616 --> 00:09:15,953
Okay. You get in bed.
You have to get up for school.

149
00:09:16,992 --> 00:09:18,031
Who's in Florida?

150
00:09:18,121 --> 00:09:19,490
Get back in bed.

151
00:09:19,580 --> 00:09:21,538
What's another word for "balls"?

152
00:09:21,947 --> 00:09:23,286
Get in bed.

153
00:09:26,163 --> 00:09:27,362
"Nuts."

154
00:09:31,199 --> 00:09:32,448
What do we do?

155
00:09:33,037 --> 00:09:34,785
I don't think we have much choice.

156
00:09:37,073 --> 00:09:38,122
Can we trust him?

157
00:09:41,289 --> 00:09:42,368
Yeah?

158
00:09:42,788 --> 00:09:44,287
Buck, this is Bob.

159
00:09:44,457 --> 00:09:45,536
Bob.

160
00:09:46,824 --> 00:09:47,823
Bob who?

161
00:09:49,991 --> 00:09:51,910
Buck, it's your brother.

162
00:09:53,538 --> 00:09:54,707
Bobby.

163
00:09:55,286 --> 00:09:57,285
Bobby, hang on a minute.

164
00:10:18,994 --> 00:10:20,953
Bobby, I just used
your Christmas present.

165
00:10:21,292 --> 00:10:23,041
Oh, the clapper.

166
00:10:23,121 --> 00:10:25,538
Bobby, you little
pissant, how you doing?

167
00:10:26,997 --> 00:10:28,915
Jeez. What are you, drunk?

168
00:10:31,083 --> 00:10:33,911
Hey, you know something?
We gotta get together.

169
00:10:34,000 --> 00:10:36,119
I haven't been over to
your house since you moved.

170
00:10:36,878 --> 00:10:40,035
Hey... I'm real sorry
about those bushes too.

171
00:10:40,125 --> 00:10:42,792
I had no idea they would
all catch on fire like that.

172
00:10:43,911 --> 00:10:46,709
You know, you were right. I should
never have put the barbecue that close.

173
00:10:47,328 --> 00:10:50,086
Buck, Cindy's father
had a heart attack tonight.

174
00:10:51,204 --> 00:10:53,872
We'd like to get down to
Indianapolis as soon as possible,

175
00:10:53,962 --> 00:10:56,370
but we have a problem with the kids.

176
00:10:56,629 --> 00:10:59,077
We're stuck for somebody to watch them.

177
00:10:59,377 --> 00:11:00,955
If you're not doing anything...

178
00:11:01,045 --> 00:11:04,083
Is this okay with Cindy?
This has got her approval on it?

179
00:11:05,172 --> 00:11:06,211
Oh, yeah.

180
00:11:06,750 --> 00:11:09,957
That would be great! I'd be honored! Sure!

181
00:11:10,047 --> 00:11:13,544
I've still got the one bedroom,
you know, I'm gonna get a bigger place,

182
00:11:13,624 --> 00:11:15,542
but they bring their
sleeping bags over here,

183
00:11:15,622 --> 00:11:17,920
we'll have some fun.
We'll make tents and stuff.

184
00:11:18,000 --> 00:11:20,877
We'll get some toys
and some peanut butter.

185
00:11:20,957 --> 00:11:23,005
I thought you could come here.

186
00:11:23,085 --> 00:11:24,544
The kids have school.

187
00:11:24,623 --> 00:11:26,751
What am I thinking about? Sure.

188
00:11:26,831 --> 00:11:28,830
Do we wanna do this
tonight or in the morning?

189
00:11:28,919 --> 00:11:31,047
Tonight would be best,
I mean, if you could do it.

190
00:11:31,127 --> 00:11:32,456
Yeah. Tonight will be fine.

191
00:11:32,546 --> 00:11:34,914
That'll be fine. Don't worry about it.

192
00:11:35,004 --> 00:11:37,082
I'll pack a few things. I'm on my way.

193
00:11:37,172 --> 00:11:38,710
Thanks. See you soon.

194
00:11:41,298 --> 00:11:42,757
He can do it.

195
00:11:42,876 --> 00:11:45,794
He was asleep, and I woke him up.

196
00:11:46,883 --> 00:11:49,251
At this hour, that's a good sign.

197
00:11:50,090 --> 00:11:51,588
We're all set.

198
00:11:59,291 --> 00:12:01,799
Okay. This, this, this.

199
00:12:06,085 --> 00:12:07,963
Bag, bag, bag.

200
00:12:08,213 --> 00:12:09,252
Okay.

201
00:12:10,001 --> 00:12:11,800
This one will do. This...

202
00:12:23,469 --> 00:12:24,508
Hello.

203
00:12:24,588 --> 00:12:26,216
Chanice? Honey?

204
00:12:27,635 --> 00:12:29,543
Honey, I have some bad news.

205
00:12:30,252 --> 00:12:31,711
Let me guess.

206
00:12:32,211 --> 00:12:34,169
You are not coming in
to work in the morning.

207
00:12:37,925 --> 00:12:39,004
Just let...

208
00:12:39,094 --> 00:12:40,173
Let...

209
00:12:41,132 --> 00:12:42,131
No, but...

210
00:12:42,261 --> 00:12:43,210
You don't...

211
00:12:43,300 --> 00:12:44,879
Would you just... Let me...

212
00:12:45,298 --> 00:12:46,467
Give me...

213
00:12:49,135 --> 00:12:50,294
You're not...

214
00:12:50,384 --> 00:12:51,922
Give me a...

215
00:12:52,592 --> 00:12:53,801
Goodbye.

216
00:12:56,798 --> 00:13:00,175
Oh, boy. Those kids. I haven't
seen those kids in a while.

217
00:13:01,803 --> 00:13:03,302
Tia's got to be nine.

218
00:13:04,011 --> 00:13:06,469
Nine, maybe ten. Oh, boy.

219
00:13:07,258 --> 00:13:09,216
And the two new ones, they're...

220
00:13:10,715 --> 00:13:15,470
Larry and...

221
00:13:17,758 --> 00:13:18,797
Betsy.

222
00:13:18,887 --> 00:13:20,296
Betsy...

223
00:13:21,924 --> 00:13:23,803
Jennifer. Jennifer.

224
00:13:24,342 --> 00:13:25,471
Larry and Jennifer.

225
00:13:25,551 --> 00:13:27,050
Nice kids.

226
00:13:32,515 --> 00:13:34,553
Honey, he's 40 years old.

227
00:13:34,633 --> 00:13:36,131
He knows his way around.

228
00:13:36,801 --> 00:13:41,556
Look, why don't you go finish packing,
and I'll watch out for Buck?

229
00:14:03,846 --> 00:14:05,424
What the hell?

230
00:14:06,093 --> 00:14:07,802
Where is everybody?

231
00:14:16,304 --> 00:14:17,383
Bob!

232
00:14:18,971 --> 00:14:20,050
Bob?

233
00:14:21,469 --> 00:14:24,346
This isn't funny! Come on! Wake up!

234
00:14:24,936 --> 00:14:26,844
I'm freezing my ass off out here!

235
00:14:26,934 --> 00:14:28,473
Oh, shit.

236
00:14:29,392 --> 00:14:30,970
Come on, I'm getting mad, Bob.

237
00:14:33,308 --> 00:14:34,637
Yo, Bobby!

238
00:14:34,807 --> 00:14:36,385
- Buck?
- Bob?

239
00:14:36,475 --> 00:14:39,303
- Buck!
- Bob?

240
00:14:39,392 --> 00:14:40,641
Over here!

241
00:14:49,054 --> 00:14:52,810
You have any idea how many big white
houses there are on this street?

242
00:14:54,179 --> 00:14:55,518
What?

243
00:14:55,597 --> 00:14:56,726
Keep it down.

244
00:14:56,806 --> 00:14:59,973
What? What do you want
me to do with my car?

245
00:15:00,063 --> 00:15:01,722
For crying out loud!

246
00:15:02,641 --> 00:15:04,179
Sorry, Mr. Hatfield!

247
00:15:04,269 --> 00:15:05,558
It's 2:00 a.m.!

248
00:15:05,638 --> 00:15:07,137
How you doing?

249
00:15:07,686 --> 00:15:09,934
- Hey, sorry I'm late.
- Oh, no, hey, come in.

250
00:15:10,014 --> 00:15:11,682
- What happened to the mustache?
- Thanks for coming.

251
00:15:12,811 --> 00:15:14,390
- Had to shave it off.
- How's Cindy?

252
00:15:14,480 --> 00:15:15,559
Not well. Not well.

253
00:15:15,639 --> 00:15:16,688
- Her dad?
- Hard to say.

254
00:15:16,768 --> 00:15:19,515
All those medical terms, huh? What is it,
an infarction or something like that?

255
00:15:28,517 --> 00:15:30,725
Hey, I stopped smoking cigarettes.

256
00:15:30,815 --> 00:15:32,933
-  Oh, good.
- Isn't that something?

257
00:15:33,312 --> 00:15:36,639
I'm on to cigars now.
I'm onto a five-year plan.

258
00:15:36,729 --> 00:15:39,227
I eliminated the cigarettes, then
I go to cigars, then I go to pipes,

259
00:15:39,307 --> 00:15:42,684
then to chewing tobacco, then
I'm onto that nicotine gum.

260
00:15:43,433 --> 00:15:44,522
Good.

261
00:15:45,351 --> 00:15:46,480
Yeah.

262
00:15:47,689 --> 00:15:49,937
Money. I'll leave you blank checks.

263
00:15:50,017 --> 00:15:52,065
No, please. I've got lots of money.

264
00:15:52,644 --> 00:15:54,982
- No!
- No, please.

265
00:15:55,062 --> 00:15:56,481
- No.
- Look, I've got the money.

266
00:15:56,561 --> 00:15:58,399
Please, I'd like to do this, all right?

267
00:15:58,479 --> 00:15:59,518
- So...
- No.

268
00:15:59,608 --> 00:16:00,937
- No, come on, will you? Please...
- Okay.

269
00:16:01,017 --> 00:16:02,935
I'll pay you back when we get home.

270
00:16:07,101 --> 00:16:09,689
I won't have any problems cashing

271
00:16:09,769 --> 00:16:12,266
a second-party out-of-state paycheck, will I?

272
00:16:12,356 --> 00:16:14,934
The reason I'm saying is,
I've been so busy lately,

273
00:16:15,024 --> 00:16:17,102
I haven't been able to do my banking.

274
00:16:17,192 --> 00:16:18,690
I don't think there will be a
problem. Don't worry about it.

275
00:16:18,770 --> 00:16:20,019
Let me just leave you the checks.

276
00:16:20,109 --> 00:16:21,897
Well, only if it's comfortable for you.

277
00:16:21,977 --> 00:16:23,026
That'll be easier.

278
00:16:23,106 --> 00:16:24,315
I guess, sure.

279
00:16:24,395 --> 00:16:28,191
Do you have a plunger here?
While I'm thinking of these things.

280
00:16:28,651 --> 00:16:31,069
For the morning, you know?
My plumbing is just so bad.

281
00:16:31,149 --> 00:16:32,977
Of course, yours is good
plumbing here, right?

282
00:16:33,067 --> 00:16:35,105
Yeah. I would imagine...
Don't worry about it.

283
00:16:35,195 --> 00:16:36,983
You know, everything will be fine.

284
00:16:37,063 --> 00:16:39,651
Just been bound up lately.
It's driving me crazy.

285
00:16:39,731 --> 00:16:41,769
I've been eating a lot of
cheese, for some reason.

286
00:16:41,859 --> 00:16:44,396
I don't know what it is,
I've got a craving for the stuff.

287
00:16:44,486 --> 00:16:46,894
Think maybe that's
an allergy or something?

288
00:16:46,984 --> 00:16:48,063
Yeah.

289
00:16:48,153 --> 00:16:50,231
I don't know. I can't get enough cheese.

290
00:16:50,321 --> 00:16:52,109
I feel like a big mouse.

291
00:16:53,688 --> 00:16:55,946
- I don't know.
- Ah, well. Ah, well.

292
00:16:56,145 --> 00:16:57,484
Let's see...

293
00:16:58,483 --> 00:17:00,112
Oh, Miles' birthday.

294
00:17:00,731 --> 00:17:03,148
Forget that. We'll be back by that time.

295
00:17:03,279 --> 00:17:04,688
Okay, then.

296
00:17:04,817 --> 00:17:07,195
This should do. I probably
won't use any of them.

297
00:17:07,275 --> 00:17:08,734
Just in case.

298
00:17:09,313 --> 00:17:11,610
- Right.
- Great. Okay.

299
00:17:20,523 --> 00:17:22,150
- Here we go.
- I know I've forgotten something.

300
00:17:22,231 --> 00:17:23,820
- Just put...
- What else? What else?

301
00:17:23,899 --> 00:17:25,278
- Right up. There you go.
- All right?

302
00:17:25,357 --> 00:17:27,146
Okay. That looks nice.

303
00:17:27,486 --> 00:17:29,564
Here. Give me your arm.

304
00:17:29,654 --> 00:17:30,943
This should only be a few days,

305
00:17:31,023 --> 00:17:32,192
and I promise I'll call you tomorrow.

306
00:17:32,322 --> 00:17:34,030
- You got all the phone numbers, right?
- Yeah.

307
00:17:34,110 --> 00:17:35,359
Well, we're off.

308
00:17:35,489 --> 00:17:36,898
- All right, you take care of yourself.
- Thanks a lot, Buck.

309
00:17:36,987 --> 00:17:38,606
- Okay. All right.
- We really appreciate it.

310
00:17:38,696 --> 00:17:40,115
- Thanks. Thanks.
- All right.

311
00:17:40,195 --> 00:17:41,363
Thank you.

312
00:17:41,443 --> 00:17:43,232
- Say hi to your dad for me.
- You can do it.

313
00:17:43,322 --> 00:17:44,940
- Drive safe, all right?
- Okay, now.

314
00:17:45,030 --> 00:17:46,449
Okay.

315
00:18:10,526 --> 00:18:12,365
Boy, that's for sure.

316
00:18:27,071 --> 00:18:28,490
Unbreakable.

317
00:18:35,203 --> 00:18:36,362
Shit.

318
00:18:38,620 --> 00:18:42,906
It's 7:02 in the a.m., you're listening
to W-I-don't-have -to-go-to-work-today,

319
00:18:42,986 --> 00:18:44,575
brought to you by Kobolowski Tires.

320
00:18:44,655 --> 00:18:47,202
For the best in tires,
see Chanice Kobolowski.

321
00:19:18,703 --> 00:19:19,702
Tia!

322
00:19:23,329 --> 00:19:24,907
You remember me?

323
00:19:29,323 --> 00:19:30,662
Uncle Buck.

324
00:19:31,411 --> 00:19:32,950
The Uncle Buck.

325
00:19:42,121 --> 00:19:43,370
Coffee drinker, huh?

326
00:19:59,165 --> 00:20:00,284
Hungry?

327
00:20:00,374 --> 00:20:02,582
- No.
- Oh, come on, sure you are.

328
00:20:02,662 --> 00:20:04,500
Everybody loves breakfast.

329
00:20:04,580 --> 00:20:07,368
You've got to have a good
breakfast, start the day off right.

330
00:20:08,117 --> 00:20:09,116
Mmm.

331
00:20:12,163 --> 00:20:14,291
So where are the other ones?

332
00:20:14,411 --> 00:20:15,410
Other ones what?

333
00:20:16,080 --> 00:20:17,618
The other kids.

334
00:20:18,078 --> 00:20:19,666
They have names.

335
00:20:19,746 --> 00:20:21,335
Miles and Maizy.

336
00:20:22,953 --> 00:20:24,702
Are Miles and Maizy up yet?

337
00:20:24,792 --> 00:20:25,791
I woke them, thank you.

338
00:20:30,167 --> 00:20:32,415
- There you go.
- Are you deaf?

339
00:20:32,494 --> 00:20:35,162
- I said I wasn't hungry.
- That's one of my specialties.

340
00:20:40,167 --> 00:20:42,245
I'd rather starve, thank you.

341
00:20:42,335 --> 00:20:44,254
Does your mom know you drink coffee?

342
00:20:45,003 --> 00:20:47,331
I'm not doing it to impress you.

343
00:20:48,120 --> 00:20:49,788
I appreciate that.

344
00:20:51,876 --> 00:20:54,334
Is there any particular reason why
you're giving me such a hard time?

345
00:20:56,332 --> 00:20:58,500
Am I giving you a hard time?

346
00:20:59,499 --> 00:21:01,497
Well, I don't know.

347
00:21:02,706 --> 00:21:04,295
Hey! How you doing?

348
00:21:04,375 --> 00:21:05,793
Who are you?

349
00:21:06,123 --> 00:21:07,712
I'm your Uncle Buck.

350
00:21:07,961 --> 00:21:09,210
Do I have an uncle?

351
00:21:09,290 --> 00:21:10,749
Unfortunately.

352
00:21:11,838 --> 00:21:13,336
Holy smokes.

353
00:21:13,796 --> 00:21:15,455
He's cooking our garbage.

354
00:21:22,128 --> 00:21:24,706
Hey, where's your sister...

355
00:21:24,796 --> 00:21:27,084
- Her name is Maizy...
- Maizy.

356
00:21:27,174 --> 00:21:28,962
...for the second time.

357
00:21:29,462 --> 00:21:30,630
Sorry.

358
00:21:32,998 --> 00:21:34,707
You must be hungry.

359
00:21:35,666 --> 00:21:37,124
Just for you.

360
00:21:38,123 --> 00:21:39,502
Oh, my God.

361
00:21:40,631 --> 00:21:42,419
He put onions in the eggs.

362
00:21:42,499 --> 00:21:44,418
I'll gonna go check on Maizy.

363
00:21:44,707 --> 00:21:47,005
I'll fix you some cereal when I get back.

364
00:22:03,840 --> 00:22:04,959
Can I ask you something?

365
00:22:05,048 --> 00:22:06,167
What?

366
00:22:07,586 --> 00:22:09,085
Is your sister always this pleasant?

367
00:22:09,175 --> 00:22:12,172
No. She's usually in
a bad mood in the morning.

368
00:22:15,009 --> 00:22:16,008
Ow!

369
00:22:16,088 --> 00:22:17,627
Do you want knots in your hair?

370
00:22:17,717 --> 00:22:19,425
- Ow!
- Cut it out.

371
00:22:19,505 --> 00:22:20,964
I want Mom to do it.

372
00:22:21,044 --> 00:22:22,382
Mom's not here.

373
00:22:22,462 --> 00:22:24,131
- She is too.
- No, she's not.

374
00:22:24,211 --> 00:22:25,969
She and Dad went to Indianapolis.

375
00:22:26,049 --> 00:22:27,627
They did not.

376
00:22:27,717 --> 00:22:28,926
Okay, they didn't.

377
00:22:29,006 --> 00:22:30,215
They did?

378
00:22:30,295 --> 00:22:33,052
Yes. I'm taking care of you.

379
00:22:33,172 --> 00:22:34,921
But you can't drive?

380
00:22:37,428 --> 00:22:39,007
- Where do you live?
- The city.

381
00:22:39,087 --> 00:22:40,176
- Do you have a house?
- Apartment.

382
00:22:40,256 --> 00:22:41,295
- Own or rent?
- Rent.

383
00:22:41,385 --> 00:22:43,093
- What do you do?
- Lots of things.

384
00:22:43,173 --> 00:22:44,592
- Where's your office?
- I don't have one.

385
00:22:44,672 --> 00:22:45,920
- How come?
- I don't need one.

386
00:22:46,010 --> 00:22:47,299
- Where's your wife?
- Don't have one.

387
00:22:47,379 --> 00:22:48,758
- How come?
- It's a long story.

388
00:22:48,838 --> 00:22:50,177
- Do you have kids?
- No, I don't.

389
00:22:50,256 --> 00:22:51,885
- How come?
- It's an even longer story.

390
00:22:51,965 --> 00:22:52,924
Are you my dad's brother?

391
00:22:53,004 --> 00:22:55,092
What's your record for
consecutive questions asked?

392
00:22:55,172 --> 00:22:56,171
38.

393
00:22:56,261 --> 00:22:57,590
I'm your dad's brother all right.

394
00:22:57,680 --> 00:22:59,887
You have more hair
on your nose than Dad.

395
00:22:59,967 --> 00:23:00,966
Nice of you to notice.

396
00:23:01,046 --> 00:23:02,175
I'm a kid. That's my job.

397
00:23:36,723 --> 00:23:39,131
That's my car.
That isn't my car.

398
00:24:00,351 --> 00:24:01,970
Tying your shoe?

399
00:24:07,934 --> 00:24:10,222
What time do you want me
to pick you up after school?

400
00:24:10,802 --> 00:24:12,600
Don't bother. I'll get a ride with friends.

401
00:24:12,680 --> 00:24:14,518
No. I've got my orders. What time?

402
00:24:15,727 --> 00:24:20,053
Are you really this stupid? I said I
would get a ride. I always get a ride.

403
00:24:20,143 --> 00:24:23,060
I'll just call the school, find out
what time, and I'll meet you right here.

404
00:24:23,810 --> 00:24:26,307
Go ahead. Call the school. I won't be here.

405
00:24:26,937 --> 00:24:30,144
Stand me up today, and tomorrow

406
00:24:30,224 --> 00:24:34,350
I'll drive you to school in my robe and
pajamas and walk you to your first class.

407
00:24:35,479 --> 00:24:36,807
4:00, okay?

408
00:24:37,886 --> 00:24:39,895
I'm stunned that I'm related to you.

409
00:24:41,143 --> 00:24:43,681
You get the pole out of your
keister, we'll get along just fine.

410
00:24:46,848 --> 00:24:49,596
Did you ever have anyone
embarrass you like this?

411
00:24:58,767 --> 00:24:59,806
No.

412
00:25:17,560 --> 00:25:18,559
You think she hates me?

413
00:25:18,649 --> 00:25:19,937
With a passion.

414
00:25:20,017 --> 00:25:22,015
Really? You think it's the hat?

415
00:25:22,265 --> 00:25:23,684
- No.
- No?

416
00:25:24,183 --> 00:25:25,642
A lot of people hate this hat.

417
00:25:25,732 --> 00:25:28,439
It angers a lot of people,
just the sight of it.

418
00:25:29,019 --> 00:25:31,856
I'll tell you a story
about that on the way to school.

419
00:25:36,732 --> 00:25:39,809
Uh-huh. Yeah, right.
Listen, Buck. For eight years,

420
00:25:39,899 --> 00:25:42,646
you have been making plans
and breaking plans.

421
00:25:42,856 --> 00:25:44,774
What are you talking about, hon?

422
00:25:44,854 --> 00:25:48,811
Didn't we talk last night?
Didn't we talk last night about this?

423
00:25:48,900 --> 00:25:50,149
What did we talk about?

424
00:25:50,229 --> 00:25:51,858
Me playing the father.

425
00:25:52,857 --> 00:25:54,565
I'm glad that you can
do it for your brother.

426
00:25:54,645 --> 00:25:56,104
You sure as hell
can't do it for me.

427
00:25:56,893 --> 00:25:58,352
How could I do it for you, hon?

428
00:25:58,442 --> 00:26:01,019
We don't have kids.
What are you talking about?

429
00:26:01,109 --> 00:26:04,896
Buck, I know you think
the job is pointless,

430
00:26:04,986 --> 00:26:06,934
and in some way, I'm
trying to manipulate you,

431
00:26:07,024 --> 00:26:09,022
and control you
and ruin your life.

432
00:26:09,521 --> 00:26:10,560
No.

433
00:26:11,689 --> 00:26:13,018
Look, I have to fill the position.

434
00:26:13,108 --> 00:26:14,437
It's important to the company,

435
00:26:14,527 --> 00:26:16,105
it's important to me.
I'm swamped down here.

436
00:26:16,185 --> 00:26:17,854
Now, unless you
tell me different,

437
00:26:17,943 --> 00:26:19,522
I'm offering the job
to somebody else.

438
00:26:20,022 --> 00:26:22,309
Why don't you give me
a week to think about it.

439
00:26:22,399 --> 00:26:24,857
You know, 'cause I don't know
how long I'm gonna be here, hon.

440
00:26:24,987 --> 00:26:29,733
And, you know, if during that
week you see somebody in there

441
00:26:29,812 --> 00:26:33,189
that's gonna fill the bill,
hire him, part-time basis or whatever.

442
00:26:33,819 --> 00:26:36,776
And that way, you know,
I'll make up my mind,

443
00:26:36,856 --> 00:26:38,444
and you know, we'll see
where we are at that point.

444
00:26:39,064 --> 00:26:40,902
Okay. Well, I have to go!

445
00:26:41,362 --> 00:26:43,020
Bye-bye, hon.

446
00:26:54,360 --> 00:26:56,358
<i>Eight. Eight more. Come on.</i>

447
00:26:56,438 --> 00:26:58,945
<i>Work it. Get the circulation going.</i>

448
00:26:59,025 --> 00:27:00,734
<i>Come on. Step it up.</i>

449
00:27:01,613 --> 00:27:03,401
Isn't peace wonderful?

450
00:27:03,481 --> 00:27:06,319
Mikhail Gorbachev, the most improbable

451
00:27:06,398 --> 00:27:08,447
evil emperor in captivity,

452
00:27:08,776 --> 00:27:11,614
captivates Manhattan, wows the UN,

453
00:27:11,694 --> 00:27:15,150
by announcing a unilateral
cut in the Soviet military,

454
00:27:15,690 --> 00:27:19,237
smiles and waves with erstwhile cold warriors

455
00:27:19,446 --> 00:27:21,025
Ronald Reagan...

456
00:27:32,774 --> 00:27:35,781
The stock market has
its best week since July.

457
00:27:36,820 --> 00:27:38,109
Take that, Karl Marx.

458
00:28:08,910 --> 00:28:11,238
Would you like to talk
about a possible lunch trade?

459
00:29:00,702 --> 00:29:02,071
Cover your ears.

460
00:29:02,161 --> 00:29:03,370
- What?
- Just do it.

461
00:29:10,533 --> 00:29:13,830
Do you know how whipped an engine
has to be to blow that loud?

462
00:29:22,332 --> 00:29:23,531
Call me.

463
00:29:25,619 --> 00:29:27,118
You ever hear of a tune-up?

464
00:29:30,415 --> 00:29:32,323
You ever hear of a ritual killing?

465
00:29:35,410 --> 00:29:36,449
I don't get it.

466
00:29:36,539 --> 00:29:38,997
You gnaw on her face in public
like that again, and you'll be one.

467
00:29:43,992 --> 00:29:45,201
Hey!

468
00:29:51,125 --> 00:29:52,954
- Are you crazy?
- I can be.

469
00:29:53,034 --> 00:29:54,622
You could have taken his head off!

470
00:29:54,702 --> 00:29:56,291
Yeah, but would he notice?

471
00:29:56,371 --> 00:29:58,289
Can we get something straight?

472
00:29:58,369 --> 00:30:00,746
The guy's a predator,
and you're his prey.

473
00:30:00,826 --> 00:30:02,785
- Oh, really.
- You bet.

474
00:30:02,875 --> 00:30:03,874
And how do you know?

475
00:30:03,954 --> 00:30:06,871
When I was his age, I was the
guy zooming the girls like you.

476
00:30:08,040 --> 00:30:10,288
Pretty face, big chip on your shoulder.

477
00:30:10,378 --> 00:30:12,835
I recommend that you
stay out of my personal life.

478
00:30:14,334 --> 00:30:16,292
Do your parents stay out
of your personal life?

479
00:30:16,372 --> 00:30:18,710
They don't know my personal life.

480
00:30:20,418 --> 00:30:21,537
Have they met twiddle dink?

481
00:30:23,126 --> 00:30:24,794
His name is Bug.

482
00:30:26,453 --> 00:30:27,961
First or last?

483
00:30:28,371 --> 00:30:31,038
- First.
- What's his last name, Spray?

484
00:30:34,705 --> 00:30:37,412
You should talk, Buck.

485
00:30:55,626 --> 00:30:56,834
No.

486
00:30:56,914 --> 00:30:58,043
No. N-O.

487
00:30:59,292 --> 00:31:00,921
Don't look at me like that.

488
00:31:02,090 --> 00:31:03,248
Don't.

489
00:31:04,337 --> 00:31:05,626
That's not fair.

490
00:31:11,671 --> 00:31:13,958
Don't you have a favorite doll or something?

491
00:31:15,587 --> 00:31:16,796
Why don't we get one of your dolls

492
00:31:16,876 --> 00:31:18,254
and put your dad's pajamas on him?

493
00:31:18,334 --> 00:31:19,373
No.

494
00:31:26,207 --> 00:31:28,545
Your brother! What about your brother?

495
00:31:29,964 --> 00:31:32,381
How about the dog? You know the dog.

496
00:31:38,296 --> 00:31:39,874
You can't. You just can't.

497
00:31:41,883 --> 00:31:45,709
It's a new law.
That's it. It's in the books.

498
00:31:48,007 --> 00:31:49,545
You don't want to sleep with me.

499
00:31:51,084 --> 00:31:52,842
Can somebody get that, please?

500
00:31:55,630 --> 00:31:57,878
Do I have to do
everything around here?

501
00:32:03,213 --> 00:32:04,252
Yo.

502
00:32:04,342 --> 00:32:06,380
Hi, sweetie. How are you?

503
00:32:06,460 --> 00:32:08,508
Fine. I'm earning my keep.

504
00:32:08,678 --> 00:32:10,586
Uncle Buck's got me busting my hump.

505
00:32:10,926 --> 00:32:13,423
He says a little hard work
will put hair on my chest.

506
00:32:13,923 --> 00:32:14,922
At least I'm learning a trade.

507
00:32:15,341 --> 00:32:16,630
That's good.

508
00:32:17,589 --> 00:32:19,048
Grandpa's feeling a little bit better.

509
00:32:19,717 --> 00:32:22,585
And he sent you big hugs and kisses.

510
00:32:22,755 --> 00:32:23,963
Tell him to hang in there.

511
00:32:25,462 --> 00:32:27,011
Can you get Uncle Buck?

512
00:32:27,091 --> 00:32:28,219
Will do, chickie.

513
00:32:30,008 --> 00:32:31,047
Mom.

514
00:32:31,257 --> 00:32:32,386
Hi.

515
00:32:32,466 --> 00:32:35,713
Next time you take off, why don't
you hire a murderer to watch the house?

516
00:32:36,802 --> 00:32:38,510
This guy's a joke.

517
00:32:38,590 --> 00:32:42,137
Well, why don't you just go
your way and let him go his.

518
00:32:43,256 --> 00:32:45,384
While he systematically
dismantles my life.

519
00:32:45,763 --> 00:32:48,760
Another drawback
is I'm a big drooler.

520
00:32:48,970 --> 00:32:50,469
You could wake up in the middle of the night

521
00:32:50,549 --> 00:32:52,087
thinking you were asleep in a swamp.

522
00:32:52,217 --> 00:32:53,546
Mom's on the phone.

523
00:32:53,636 --> 00:32:55,424
Oh, good. I'll be right there.

524
00:32:55,514 --> 00:32:58,052
The guy took off and
left Miles and Maizy alone.

525
00:33:00,140 --> 00:33:02,717
Plus...he drinks.

526
00:33:03,347 --> 00:33:04,925
Did you brush your teeth?

527
00:33:05,015 --> 00:33:06,764
Yeah. You can feel my toothbrush.

528
00:33:06,844 --> 00:33:10,091
I have a friend who works at the
crime lab at the police station.

529
00:33:10,590 --> 00:33:12,179
I could give him your toothbrush

530
00:33:12,259 --> 00:33:15,176
and he could run a test on it to see
if you actually brushed your teeth

531
00:33:15,266 --> 00:33:18,223
or just ran your toothbrush under the faucet.

532
00:33:26,216 --> 00:33:30,132
If that's true, we're gonna really
have to start brushing our teeth.

533
00:33:31,720 --> 00:33:33,049
Hi. How are you?

534
00:33:33,219 --> 00:33:34,888
I'm okay. How's everything?

535
00:33:35,017 --> 00:33:36,386
Good. Good.

536
00:33:36,846 --> 00:33:38,095
You sure?

537
00:33:38,224 --> 00:33:40,842
Everything is fine here.
Everything is fine.

538
00:33:41,392 --> 00:33:42,510
Kids are okay?

539
00:33:42,600 --> 00:33:45,468
Kids are great! We're having
a great time together.

540
00:33:45,558 --> 00:33:47,016
How's your dad?

541
00:33:47,136 --> 00:33:49,514
He's okay. He's okay.
He's getting better. Thanks.

542
00:33:49,804 --> 00:33:51,972
Good. Well, that's good
news. That's encouraging.

543
00:33:52,052 --> 00:33:53,970
I've got a real good feeling
about this. He's gonna be fine.

544
00:33:54,889 --> 00:33:56,467
I've got a few questions for you.

545
00:33:57,227 --> 00:33:59,974
You know, you got an interesting set
of plates in the living room there.

546
00:34:00,054 --> 00:34:01,053
Are they old?

547
00:34:01,143 --> 00:34:02,142
Yeah.

548
00:34:02,222 --> 00:34:03,221
They are.

549
00:34:04,560 --> 00:34:06,638
Where would you find
something like that?

550
00:34:06,728 --> 00:34:09,056
ln an antique shop
downtown or something?

551
00:34:11,184 --> 00:34:12,223
ln England.

552
00:34:12,682 --> 00:34:13,891
Everything else seems...

553
00:34:19,765 --> 00:34:21,894
How many times a day do
you feed a dog like that?

554
00:34:22,643 --> 00:34:26,310
How many times a day
do you think he eats?

555
00:34:27,059 --> 00:34:28,098
Four or five.

556
00:34:28,807 --> 00:34:31,055
I should have told you that he
eats once. He eats once a day.

557
00:34:31,855 --> 00:34:33,183
Just once.

558
00:34:34,642 --> 00:34:37,140
What does he like to drink? Water?

559
00:34:37,229 --> 00:34:39,227
Yes. He drinks water.

560
00:34:39,307 --> 00:34:40,805
I'd keep some water out.

561
00:34:40,896 --> 00:34:42,854
I've been leaving the toilet seats up.

562
00:34:43,814 --> 00:34:44,893
Yeah.

563
00:34:45,971 --> 00:34:47,850
Is that what the blue water
is? It's not good for him.

564
00:34:48,139 --> 00:34:49,888
Oh, God.

565
00:34:50,188 --> 00:34:52,056
That might account for something.

566
00:34:52,555 --> 00:34:53,764
Nothing.

567
00:34:53,894 --> 00:34:58,060
Just an odd coloration out on the grass.

568
00:34:59,019 --> 00:35:00,388
Buck, um...

569
00:35:02,516 --> 00:35:06,353
I just want you to know it makes me
feel very secure to know that you're there.

570
00:35:09,979 --> 00:35:11,058
Thank you very much.

571
00:35:11,348 --> 00:35:12,727
Okay. Bye-bye.

572
00:35:19,980 --> 00:35:22,937
Bob!

573
00:36:56,151 --> 00:36:57,479
Cindy!

574
00:37:07,440 --> 00:37:08,899
Come on. Open up.

575
00:37:11,277 --> 00:37:12,445
Hello.

576
00:37:20,948 --> 00:37:22,406
I'm getting mad.

577
00:37:22,486 --> 00:37:23,695
All right.

578
00:37:23,825 --> 00:37:25,823
Get ready. Here I come.

579
00:37:25,903 --> 00:37:27,192
Come on!

580
00:37:27,282 --> 00:37:28,780
What? Do I have to talk dirty to you?

581
00:37:28,860 --> 00:37:30,239
Come on, open up for daddy!

582
00:37:32,617 --> 00:37:34,905
There we go. Come on. Nice and easy.

583
00:37:37,322 --> 00:37:38,821
Come on, there we go. Ah! Take that!

584
00:37:38,901 --> 00:37:41,029
Take that! Come on! You don't
want the crowbar, do you?

585
00:37:41,109 --> 00:37:42,108
Come on!

586
00:37:43,407 --> 00:37:44,825
Open up!

587
00:37:44,905 --> 00:37:46,034
Come on!

588
00:37:46,863 --> 00:37:48,942
I'm going to shove my load into
you whether you like it or not.

589
00:37:49,031 --> 00:37:50,030
Come on!

590
00:37:51,030 --> 00:37:52,698
Come on, you son of a bitch.

591
00:37:53,158 --> 00:37:54,157
Open up.

592
00:37:57,194 --> 00:37:58,283
Okay.

593
00:38:14,078 --> 00:38:15,487
- Freeze!
- What?

594
00:38:15,577 --> 00:38:17,155
- Who are you?
- Cindy!

595
00:38:17,655 --> 00:38:18,864
She's in Indianapolis.

596
00:38:18,954 --> 00:38:20,572
What's she doing in Indianapolis?

597
00:38:21,162 --> 00:38:22,450
Her father had a heart attack.

598
00:38:22,870 --> 00:38:25,827
Who are you? And how do you know
her father had a heart attack?

599
00:38:26,037 --> 00:38:27,486
I'm her brother-in-law.

600
00:38:27,576 --> 00:38:29,784
Oh, yeah? Who you talking dirty to?

601
00:38:32,821 --> 00:38:34,279
The washing machine.

602
00:38:34,739 --> 00:38:36,158
I... I don't know how to work it,

603
00:38:36,238 --> 00:38:37,996
so I was kicking it and swearing at it,

604
00:38:38,076 --> 00:38:40,703
you know, which is not
an uncommon thing to do.

605
00:38:41,363 --> 00:38:42,662
And you thought that...

606
00:38:42,742 --> 00:38:44,280
Oh, jeez...

607
00:38:44,370 --> 00:38:45,659
I apologize.

608
00:38:45,739 --> 00:38:46,828
Okay.

609
00:38:48,906 --> 00:38:50,574
Boy! That's funny.

610
00:38:52,992 --> 00:38:54,990
I live across the street.

611
00:38:55,330 --> 00:38:56,369
My name is Marcie.

612
00:38:56,828 --> 00:38:57,828
Buck Russell.

613
00:38:58,907 --> 00:39:00,365
Marcie Dahlgren-Frost.

614
00:39:00,745 --> 00:39:02,163
Dahlgren is my maiden name.

615
00:39:02,243 --> 00:39:03,282
Frost is my married name.

616
00:39:03,372 --> 00:39:06,370
I'm single again, but I
never bothered to lose the Frost.

617
00:39:07,698 --> 00:39:09,657
And I get compliments on the hyphen.

618
00:39:09,746 --> 00:39:11,665
Sure you would. Sure you would. Yeah.

619
00:39:13,283 --> 00:39:15,911
Well, I came to invite Cindy to lunch.

620
00:39:15,991 --> 00:39:18,199
But since she's not here,
do you have plans?

621
00:39:18,908 --> 00:39:21,995
Actually, I got a lot
of things to do around here.

622
00:39:22,075 --> 00:39:23,454
Rain check?

623
00:39:24,493 --> 00:39:26,491
I'll only be here a couple days.

624
00:39:26,871 --> 00:39:28,829
Cindy said it would
only be a couple days?

625
00:39:28,909 --> 00:39:31,167
Well, she didn't specify.
I just assumed, you know.

626
00:39:31,456 --> 00:39:34,334
My father's heart attack,
I was out of town for three weeks.

627
00:39:34,783 --> 00:39:36,452
No wonder Cindy didn't call me.

628
00:39:36,911 --> 00:39:39,659
You need a relative
for an imposition this size.

629
00:39:50,579 --> 00:39:51,787
Waiting for your sex?

630
00:39:52,627 --> 00:39:53,875
Shut up.

631
00:39:54,205 --> 00:39:58,501
Tia.

632
00:40:00,170 --> 00:40:03,247
What did you blow all that make-up
for? We're just going bowling.

633
00:40:04,086 --> 00:40:05,415
I'm not going bowling.

634
00:40:05,495 --> 00:40:06,494
Come on, it's a great sport.

635
00:40:06,584 --> 00:40:09,001
And it's virtually impossible
to get pregnant while doing it.

636
00:40:09,411 --> 00:40:10,410
If you catch my drift.

637
00:40:11,169 --> 00:40:12,828
You're disgusting.

638
00:40:13,587 --> 00:40:15,745
I'll die before
I go anywhere with you.

639
00:40:16,295 --> 00:40:17,454
It's gonna be fun.

640
00:40:17,543 --> 00:40:18,752
They have rent-a-shoes.

641
00:40:19,292 --> 00:40:20,870
And rent-a-foot-disease.

642
00:40:21,170 --> 00:40:23,038
We've done the battle of the wills.

643
00:40:23,128 --> 00:40:25,036
The deck's stacked in my favor.

644
00:40:25,246 --> 00:40:26,245
You're just gonna lose again.

645
00:40:27,374 --> 00:40:28,583
Try me.

646
00:40:29,502 --> 00:40:31,171
How'd you like to spend
the next several nights

647
00:40:31,251 --> 00:40:34,208
wondering if your crazy
out-of-work bum uncle

648
00:40:34,997 --> 00:40:37,085
will shave your head
while you sleep?

649
00:40:37,954 --> 00:40:39,203
See you in the car.

650
00:41:11,214 --> 00:41:12,502
Yeah!

651
00:41:18,717 --> 00:41:20,165
There you go.

652
00:41:20,255 --> 00:41:22,083
Now, this is a bowling ball.

653
00:41:56,252 --> 00:41:57,341
How you doing?

654
00:41:57,421 --> 00:41:59,209
I've never seen you here before.

655
00:41:59,589 --> 00:42:01,087
I know about everybody.

656
00:42:01,427 --> 00:42:03,385
That's why they call me Pal.

657
00:42:04,924 --> 00:42:06,462
Buy you a beer?

658
00:42:07,421 --> 00:42:09,300
You must be a college student, right?

659
00:42:10,548 --> 00:42:12,297
Cheerleader, probably.

660
00:42:13,676 --> 00:42:15,094
You look firm.

661
00:42:15,923 --> 00:42:17,552
Come on. Give it a push.

662
00:42:19,011 --> 00:42:21,259
You like all-terrain vehicles?

663
00:42:22,427 --> 00:42:27,463
I got a brand-new Bronco right
out in the parking lot. Red.

664
00:42:28,422 --> 00:42:29,920
Want to go for a ride?

665
00:42:33,717 --> 00:42:35,715
Maizy, if the object of the game were

666
00:42:35,805 --> 00:42:38,882
to get the ball as close to the
pins without knocking any over,

667
00:42:39,382 --> 00:42:41,799
you would be champion of the world.

668
00:42:41,929 --> 00:42:43,428
- Really?
- Really.

669
00:42:50,761 --> 00:42:52,799
My throat sort of hurts.

670
00:42:52,889 --> 00:42:53,888
I can't talk.

671
00:42:54,717 --> 00:42:56,136
I got a cure for that.

672
00:43:02,390 --> 00:43:03,509
Buck.

673
00:43:03,599 --> 00:43:05,547
You got a game somewhere, Pal?

674
00:43:05,637 --> 00:43:06,676
Yeah.

675
00:43:06,766 --> 00:43:08,515
You won't get any strikes
sitting there, are you?

676
00:43:08,595 --> 00:43:09,803
Move it! Go on, get out!

677
00:43:13,470 --> 00:43:16,008
Hey, shithead! Where
the hell you been, huh?

678
00:43:18,595 --> 00:43:20,344
Hey! Hey! Hey!

679
00:43:21,592 --> 00:43:23,591
Come on, sit down. I want
you to meet my niece.

680
00:43:24,100 --> 00:43:26,058
Tia, this is Rog. Rog, Tia.

681
00:43:26,218 --> 00:43:27,637
Hi. How are you?

682
00:43:27,767 --> 00:43:29,725
E. Roger Coswell.

683
00:43:30,264 --> 00:43:32,472
Come on. It ain't gonna bite.

684
00:43:34,850 --> 00:43:38,467
Okay. You've got to let
somebody know where you are.

685
00:43:38,557 --> 00:43:40,725
I've been checking
car trunks for your corpse.

686
00:43:40,805 --> 00:43:41,844
Yeah, I'm sorry about that.

687
00:43:41,934 --> 00:43:44,601
I've been out in the suburbs looking
after my brother's kids for a few days.

688
00:43:45,970 --> 00:43:47,179
They're cute! Oh, I tell you.

689
00:43:47,269 --> 00:43:50,096
Art Linkletter was right, kids
do say the god damnedest things.

690
00:43:50,386 --> 00:43:51,974
Is Chanice here?

691
00:43:52,094 --> 00:43:54,802
No. I'm kinda flying solo tonight.

692
00:43:54,892 --> 00:43:56,760
I want to let her have
it for not marrying you.

693
00:43:56,850 --> 00:43:59,727
You know, if she caged you
and married your worthless butt,

694
00:43:59,807 --> 00:44:01,555
I'd be able to find you.

695
00:44:01,635 --> 00:44:03,264
I got to talk business. I can't find you.

696
00:44:03,973 --> 00:44:06,930
Why don't we step in my office, then?

697
00:44:07,020 --> 00:44:09,018
Excuse us, will you. Come on.

698
00:44:09,768 --> 00:44:10,927
It was nice meeting you.

699
00:44:11,057 --> 00:44:12,895
I'll remember it always.

700
00:44:17,101 --> 00:44:18,350
Cute kid.

701
00:44:19,059 --> 00:44:20,887
Jimmy Bean called.

702
00:44:21,637 --> 00:44:22,686
Oh, yeah?

703
00:44:22,766 --> 00:44:24,304
He's coming in for the Winter Million

704
00:44:24,394 --> 00:44:26,103
at Burlington Park on Friday.

705
00:44:26,432 --> 00:44:29,100
He says it's a boat race. Very easy money.

706
00:44:29,180 --> 00:44:30,678
He owes you and he owes me.

707
00:44:30,768 --> 00:44:33,226
So he says we should show
up an hour before post time

708
00:44:33,306 --> 00:44:34,725
and he'll give us the tip.

709
00:44:35,104 --> 00:44:38,561
Consider this, Buck, with this
score, your whole year's covered.

710
00:44:40,519 --> 00:44:41,518
Huh?

711
00:44:44,266 --> 00:44:45,764
Maybe I can make it work.

712
00:44:46,933 --> 00:44:48,602
I'll see you Friday night.

713
00:44:49,431 --> 00:44:50,430
Thanks, Rog.

714
00:44:50,520 --> 00:44:52,598
Watch the sterno, will you?

715
00:44:58,103 --> 00:44:59,981
Hey, watch your fingers.

716
00:45:00,770 --> 00:45:01,849
Yay!

717
00:45:03,768 --> 00:45:05,016
What's a Chanice?

718
00:45:06,065 --> 00:45:08,723
That's someone who's
sometimes seen around a Buck.

719
00:45:08,813 --> 00:45:10,521
Your girlfriend?

720
00:45:10,601 --> 00:45:13,598
A friend, and, yes, she is a girl.

721
00:45:13,898 --> 00:45:15,936
Are you supposed to
marry her or something?

722
00:45:16,016 --> 00:45:19,393
The subject has come up,
yes, but nothing serious.

723
00:45:19,853 --> 00:45:22,520
Maybe if you got married,
you'd stop being such an asshole.

724
00:45:28,525 --> 00:45:29,773
Cigar?

725
00:45:30,143 --> 00:45:31,272
No, thanks.

726
00:45:31,352 --> 00:45:33,310
Let me know if you change your mind.

727
00:45:33,400 --> 00:45:34,399
I will.

728
00:45:35,318 --> 00:45:37,147
I'll get it nice and juicy for you.

729
00:45:48,146 --> 00:45:51,353
This is where you separate
the men from the boys.

730
00:45:53,561 --> 00:45:57,188
Easy. Easy. There you go. Yeah.

731
00:45:57,278 --> 00:45:58,936
I got you now.

732
00:46:10,775 --> 00:46:12,733
Happy birthday!

733
00:46:12,813 --> 00:46:13,812
Whoo!

734
00:46:15,611 --> 00:46:17,319
I hope you're hungry.

735
00:46:18,778 --> 00:46:19,857
You should see the toast!

736
00:46:19,937 --> 00:46:21,565
I couldn't even
get it through the door.

737
00:46:29,738 --> 00:46:32,275
Ah, announcement here.

738
00:46:32,605 --> 00:46:34,943
There's going to be a
little delay on the clown.

739
00:46:35,023 --> 00:46:36,401
What clown?

740
00:46:36,611 --> 00:46:38,320
Miles' mom hired a clown.

741
00:46:54,655 --> 00:46:56,073
What's the matter?
You don't like clowns?

742
00:46:56,573 --> 00:46:58,321
Yeah. About five years ago.

743
00:46:58,401 --> 00:47:00,899
Clowns are so boring,
they make me puke.

744
00:47:05,484 --> 00:47:07,403
Screw them. That's all they get.

745
00:47:09,571 --> 00:47:11,239
I'm Pooter-The-Clown.

746
00:47:11,449 --> 00:47:12,738
Put it there.

747
00:47:15,615 --> 00:47:16,944
The kids will love that.

748
00:47:17,034 --> 00:47:18,942
I didn't order you.
My sister-in-law did.

749
00:47:19,032 --> 00:47:21,609
She's not here right now. I'm
looking after them. I'm the uncle.

750
00:47:21,699 --> 00:47:22,818
I'm Buck Russell.

751
00:47:22,908 --> 00:47:25,196
Great, listen, I'm sorry I'm late.

752
00:47:25,276 --> 00:47:28,533
I was at this all-night
bachelorette party.

753
00:47:28,863 --> 00:47:30,191
Need any dildo jokes?

754
00:47:30,281 --> 00:47:31,950
Wham! I'm the guy!

755
00:47:36,735 --> 00:47:38,484
What did you have?
A few drinks this morning?

756
00:47:39,113 --> 00:47:41,321
Huh? I think you did, didn't you?

757
00:47:41,991 --> 00:47:43,529
Who are you? Mother Cabrini?

758
00:47:43,619 --> 00:47:45,158
You never touch the stuff?

759
00:47:45,277 --> 00:47:46,486
No, no, no,

760
00:47:46,576 --> 00:47:49,404
but I wouldn't be drinking if I
was going to entertain some kids.

761
00:47:49,494 --> 00:47:51,702
I don't have to take any shit from you.

762
00:47:51,951 --> 00:47:53,360
You know who I am?

763
00:47:53,450 --> 00:47:56,827
In the field of local
live home entertainment,

764
00:47:56,907 --> 00:47:58,235
I'm a God!

765
00:47:59,284 --> 00:48:01,652
Get in your mouse and get out of here.

766
00:48:02,282 --> 00:48:04,620
Hey, you, let me tell you something,

767
00:48:04,699 --> 00:48:09,325
you low-life, lying,
four-flushing sack of shit.

768
00:48:32,613 --> 00:48:34,742
Let's go out to the car, huh?

769
00:48:36,830 --> 00:48:38,038
Why?

770
00:48:39,407 --> 00:48:41,455
What do you mean, why?

771
00:48:47,290 --> 00:48:48,539
Not now.

772
00:48:49,498 --> 00:48:50,617
It's fine.

773
00:48:52,955 --> 00:48:54,783
It's not fine.

774
00:48:55,492 --> 00:48:56,741
Why not?

775
00:48:58,579 --> 00:49:00,408
I just don't feel right yet.

776
00:49:02,366 --> 00:49:03,994
You ever going to feel right?

777
00:49:10,249 --> 00:49:11,747
I don't get where we're going.

778
00:49:11,827 --> 00:49:14,824
I told you 25 times.
We're going to pick up Tia.

779
00:49:14,914 --> 00:49:16,832
She's at a cheerleader's
house having dinner.

780
00:49:16,912 --> 00:49:18,201
Well, so she says.

781
00:49:18,791 --> 00:49:21,118
Since when do cheerleaders
live in the woods?

782
00:49:25,784 --> 00:49:27,872
Come on. I'll take you home now.

783
00:49:29,830 --> 00:49:31,789
I don't want to go home.

784
00:49:35,995 --> 00:49:37,283
I'm okay.

785
00:49:37,953 --> 00:49:39,202
Sure?

786
00:49:43,578 --> 00:49:44,956
Trust me.

787
00:49:56,915 --> 00:49:58,294
- Shit!
- Shit!

788
00:50:15,628 --> 00:50:17,246
Well, well, well.

789
00:50:17,666 --> 00:50:21,372
They certainly are scraping the bottom
of the barrel for cheerleaders these days.

790
00:50:22,671 --> 00:50:24,669
What are you doing here?

791
00:50:25,169 --> 00:50:27,287
We were just driving by,
going out for some ice cream.

792
00:50:27,377 --> 00:50:28,875
Thought you might like to join us.

793
00:50:29,585 --> 00:50:32,872
I said I would be home
at 10:00. It's not even 9:00.

794
00:50:36,249 --> 00:50:39,755
Who said anything about that? I just
thought you'd like to join us for some ice cream.

795
00:50:40,585 --> 00:50:42,463
Maybe your Bug here can join us.

796
00:50:42,623 --> 00:50:44,671
We can talk about burying the hatchet.

797
00:50:44,751 --> 00:50:46,629
You know what a hatchet is, don't you, Bug?

798
00:50:46,919 --> 00:50:48,297
It's an ax?

799
00:50:48,457 --> 00:50:49,956
Sort of. Yeah. Yeah.

800
00:50:50,795 --> 00:50:52,663
I got one in the car
if you'd like to see it.

801
00:50:54,542 --> 00:50:55,631
I'll pass.

802
00:50:55,751 --> 00:50:58,588
Fair enough. I like to carry it.

803
00:50:58,798 --> 00:51:00,706
You never know when you're gonna need it.

804
00:51:01,715 --> 00:51:04,672
A situation may come up, say,

805
00:51:04,752 --> 00:51:09,458
for example, someone's been drinking
and about to drive a loved one home,

806
00:51:10,377 --> 00:51:11,965
then I like to know I have it.

807
00:51:12,335 --> 00:51:15,422
Not to kill. Just to maim.

808
00:51:16,381 --> 00:51:18,959
Take a little off the shoulder. Woosh!

809
00:51:19,798 --> 00:51:21,127
The elbow.

810
00:51:21,297 --> 00:51:24,124
Shave a little meat off the old kneecap.

811
00:51:24,334 --> 00:51:25,333
Whoo.

812
00:51:25,793 --> 00:51:27,291
You got both kneecaps?

813
00:51:28,051 --> 00:51:30,548
I like to keep mine razor-sharp, too.

814
00:51:30,758 --> 00:51:32,836
Sharp enough you can shave with them.

815
00:51:32,926 --> 00:51:35,464
Why, I've been known
to circumcise a gnat.

816
00:51:36,962 --> 00:51:39,090
You're not a gnat, are you, Bug?

817
00:51:39,170 --> 00:51:42,717
Wait a minute. Bug, gnat.

818
00:51:44,635 --> 00:51:46,793
Is there a little similarity there?

819
00:51:48,761 --> 00:51:51,509
Whoa! I think there is.

820
00:51:53,797 --> 00:51:56,384
You understand what I'm talking about?

821
00:51:57,463 --> 00:51:59,252
I don't think you do.

822
00:51:59,341 --> 00:52:01,090
I'll be right back.

823
00:52:09,382 --> 00:52:10,711
I'm sorry.

824
00:52:10,801 --> 00:52:12,759
Look, um, I think you'd better split.

825
00:52:12,839 --> 00:52:15,506
You know, I don't exactly want
him going berserk with an ax on me.

826
00:52:16,466 --> 00:52:17,754
He's all talk.

827
00:52:17,844 --> 00:52:19,213
Here it is.

828
00:52:20,302 --> 00:52:23,429
Come on over. Come on,
I wanna show it to you.

829
00:52:25,467 --> 00:52:26,886
Maybe later.

830
00:52:27,635 --> 00:52:28,714
Okay.

831
00:52:35,348 --> 00:52:37,806
He's gone in a few days.

832
00:52:38,305 --> 00:52:39,304
Just relax.

833
00:52:40,923 --> 00:52:42,631
I'll get him back.

834
00:52:58,007 --> 00:53:00,714
That's a pretty stupid thing
to do during flu season.

835
00:53:00,804 --> 00:53:02,842
I bet she's getting the tongue.

836
00:54:06,104 --> 00:54:07,143
Just looking.

837
00:55:27,068 --> 00:55:28,147
Next.

838
00:55:30,026 --> 00:55:31,734
Tell you what. Let me
go in there first, okay?

839
00:55:31,814 --> 00:55:34,651
I'll cover for you, give you a
little more time out here to relax.

840
00:55:35,361 --> 00:55:36,480
Okay. Mmm. All right?

841
00:55:44,812 --> 00:55:46,191
Good morning.

842
00:55:53,814 --> 00:55:55,562
I'm Anita Hoargarth.

843
00:55:56,271 --> 00:55:59,358
Buck Melanoma, Moley Russell's wart.

844
00:56:02,815 --> 00:56:06,812
Not her wart, not her wart. I'm the wart.

845
00:56:07,071 --> 00:56:11,147
She's my tumor, my growth, my... my pimple.

846
00:56:11,237 --> 00:56:12,566
I'm "Uncle Wart."

847
00:56:12,646 --> 00:56:15,444
Buck "Wart" Russell,
that's what they call me.

848
00:56:15,523 --> 00:56:18,231
Or melanoma head.
They'll call me that.

849
00:56:19,150 --> 00:56:21,148
"Melanoma head's" coming.

850
00:56:21,898 --> 00:56:24,565
I'm... Uncle, Maizy Russell's uncle.

851
00:56:24,655 --> 00:56:26,194
Her uncle.

852
00:56:26,983 --> 00:56:29,860
Her mother set up
this conference with you.

853
00:56:30,649 --> 00:56:32,737
I'm assistant principal here,

854
00:56:32,817 --> 00:56:36,194
as you've probably noticed
from the indications on the door.

855
00:56:40,151 --> 00:56:41,359
This door?

856
00:56:41,439 --> 00:56:43,108
The outer door. Yes. The outer door.

857
00:56:43,737 --> 00:56:45,566
There's nothing on this one.

858
00:56:45,655 --> 00:56:47,564
That's just about enough of that.

859
00:56:49,652 --> 00:56:50,821
Sorry.

860
00:56:51,990 --> 00:56:57,065
I've been an educator for 31.3 years,

861
00:56:57,155 --> 00:57:00,941
and in that time, I've
seen a lot of bad eggs.

862
00:57:01,071 --> 00:57:04,488
I say "eggs" because
at the elementary level,

863
00:57:04,568 --> 00:57:07,655
we are not dealing with
fully developed individuals.

864
00:57:11,322 --> 00:57:15,448
I see a bad egg when
I look at your niece.

865
00:57:16,906 --> 00:57:21,362
She is a twiddler,
a dreamer, a silly heart.

866
00:57:21,782 --> 00:57:23,700
She is a jabberbox.

867
00:57:23,990 --> 00:57:25,488
And frankly...

868
00:57:25,658 --> 00:57:32,492
I don't think she takes a thing in her
life or her career as a student seriously.

869
00:57:35,739 --> 00:57:37,028
She's only six.

870
00:57:37,118 --> 00:57:38,946
That is not a valid excuse!

871
00:57:39,036 --> 00:57:41,534
I hear that every
day and I dismiss it.

872
00:57:42,453 --> 00:57:44,031
I don't think I want
to know a six-year-old

873
00:57:44,111 --> 00:57:46,159
who isn't a dreamer, or a silly heart.

874
00:57:46,239 --> 00:57:49,406
And I sure don't want to know one
who takes their student career seriously.

875
00:57:50,575 --> 00:57:52,823
I don't have a college degree

876
00:57:53,323 --> 00:57:54,821
I don't even have a job.

877
00:57:55,950 --> 00:57:59,946
Does anyone have a special story
about something that happened this week?

878
00:58:01,155 --> 00:58:02,154
Maizy.

879
00:58:02,614 --> 00:58:04,362
My uncle was microwaving my socks,

880
00:58:04,452 --> 00:58:07,160
and the dog threw up on
the couch for about an hour.

881
00:58:07,619 --> 00:58:09,158
- Honest?
- Yes.

882
00:58:09,488 --> 00:58:11,496
Why was your uncle
microwaving your socks?

883
00:58:11,656 --> 00:58:14,073
He can't get the goddamn
washing machine to work.

884
00:58:14,363 --> 00:58:15,742
Blasphemer!

885
00:58:16,661 --> 00:58:18,779
I know a good kid when I see one.

886
00:58:18,869 --> 00:58:20,657
Because they're all good kids

887
00:58:20,747 --> 00:58:24,034
until dried-out, brain-dead skags like you

888
00:58:24,114 --> 00:58:26,282
drag them down and convince
them they're no good.

889
00:58:27,201 --> 00:58:30,198
You so much as scowl at my niece
or any other kid in this school

890
00:58:30,288 --> 00:58:31,447
and I hear about it,

891
00:58:31,537 --> 00:58:33,036
I'm coming looking for you.

892
00:58:36,163 --> 00:58:37,831
Take this quarter.

893
00:58:38,581 --> 00:58:42,247
Go downtown, and have a rat
gnaw that thing off your face.

894
00:58:44,075 --> 00:58:45,454
Good day to you, madam.

895
00:58:53,287 --> 00:58:54,326
Next.

896
00:58:55,075 --> 00:58:56,454
Ah, yeah!

897
00:59:16,995 --> 00:59:19,662
<i>Hi, Chanice. This is Terry.</i>

898
00:59:20,452 --> 00:59:22,080
<i>Walt Bern...</i>

899
00:59:22,580 --> 00:59:26,536
Jesus, would you get with the
program. Bernstein is his name.

900
00:59:26,626 --> 00:59:28,334
<i>I forgot to give you the message.</i>

901
00:59:28,544 --> 00:59:32,161
At least somebody knows
what they're doing down there.

902
00:59:32,750 --> 00:59:34,249
<i>Chanice? Buck.</i>

903
00:59:36,327 --> 00:59:38,205
<i>I hate these machines.</i>

904
00:59:38,795 --> 00:59:42,002
<i>Look, I'm just calling to say I miss you.</i>

905
00:59:43,500 --> 00:59:46,378
<i>I know you probably don't
believe it, but it's true.</i>

906
00:59:46,457 --> 00:59:47,996
<i>No, I haven't been drinking.</i>

907
00:59:48,496 --> 00:59:49,834
<i>I've been thinking a lot about you</i>

908
00:59:49,914 --> 00:59:52,502
<i>and what we've talked
about the past few weeks.</i>

909
00:59:52,582 --> 00:59:54,580
<i>I think about you all the time.</i>

910
00:59:54,670 --> 00:59:58,037
<i>I think about those
two dimples on your buns.</i>

911
00:59:58,247 --> 00:59:59,545
Dimples.

912
00:59:59,995 --> 01:00:01,753
<i>What did we call them?</i>

913
01:00:01,833 --> 01:00:05,999
<i>The one on the right was Lyndon,
and the left was Johnson.</i>

914
01:00:06,079 --> 01:00:07,918
<i>No, that was your boobs we did.</i>

915
01:00:07,997 --> 01:00:09,456
<i>No, your boobs were Minnie and Mickey.</i>

916
01:00:09,546 --> 01:00:11,165
<i>I remember that because of Disney World.</i>

917
01:00:12,084 --> 01:00:13,412
<i>And Felix. Felix is what we called your...</i>

918
01:00:15,670 --> 01:00:17,838
God damn kids.

919
01:00:18,168 --> 01:00:19,587
Okay. Come on, you.

920
01:00:19,667 --> 01:00:20,746
Come on, get in the house.

921
01:00:20,836 --> 01:00:23,004
What are you doing out here,
making all this noise?

922
01:00:23,753 --> 01:00:24,962
Get in the house where you belong.

923
01:00:25,042 --> 01:00:26,670
Come on! Come on!

924
01:00:27,419 --> 01:00:28,498
Hey!

925
01:00:29,128 --> 01:00:30,796
Who let the cat out?

926
01:00:30,876 --> 01:00:32,665
We don't have a cat.

927
01:00:33,294 --> 01:00:35,042
Come on! Get out!

928
01:00:35,212 --> 01:00:36,331
Go on! Shoo!

929
01:00:43,464 --> 01:00:44,504
Hey!

930
01:00:46,961 --> 01:00:48,170
Open up!

931
01:00:48,999 --> 01:00:50,168
Miles?

932
01:00:56,712 --> 01:00:57,711
Hello.

933
01:00:57,791 --> 01:00:59,749
Hi. May I please speak to Buck Russell?

934
01:00:59,839 --> 01:01:02,127
This is a friend of his Chanice Kobolowski.

935
01:01:04,585 --> 01:01:08,381
I'm sorry, Chanice. He's not here right now.

936
01:01:10,340 --> 01:01:12,298
Well, can you tell me
when he's gonna be back?

937
01:01:12,378 --> 01:01:13,836
He went out with Marcie,

938
01:01:13,926 --> 01:01:16,004
the lady who lives across the street.

939
01:01:16,714 --> 01:01:18,592
They usually stay out pretty late.

940
01:01:23,627 --> 01:01:24,926
Do you want to leave a message?

941
01:01:31,969 --> 01:01:33,378
No. There's no message.

942
01:01:52,880 --> 01:01:54,628
There's no message.

943
01:02:20,305 --> 01:02:21,384
Hot!

944
01:02:35,301 --> 01:02:38,098
Is there a big, sexy guy in here?

945
01:02:38,887 --> 01:02:40,426
Oh, please don't let it be true.

946
01:02:42,134 --> 01:02:43,173
Hi.

947
01:02:43,263 --> 01:02:46,300
Oh, my God! What are you doing?

948
01:02:46,680 --> 01:02:48,598
The laundry. What's it look like?

949
01:02:49,098 --> 01:02:50,636
The washing machine's still broken,

950
01:02:50,716 --> 01:02:52,465
so I thought I'd use the microwave.

951
01:02:52,804 --> 01:02:55,012
Nuke them up, you know.
Heats them up pretty good, too.

952
01:02:55,842 --> 01:02:58,179
It kills the germs
and odors that they cause.

953
01:02:58,259 --> 01:02:59,968
You don't know what you're doing.

954
01:03:00,058 --> 01:03:01,306
You're bored out of your mind.

955
01:03:01,386 --> 01:03:03,384
You need a little adult supervision.

956
01:03:04,973 --> 01:03:06,012
Excuse me?

957
01:03:21,218 --> 01:03:22,217
Come on.

958
01:03:22,347 --> 01:03:24,685
Come on. I don't want to dance. Come on.

959
01:03:24,765 --> 01:03:27,972
I don't feel like...
I'm not a dancer. This is ridiculous.

960
01:03:28,052 --> 01:03:30,060
I'm not gonna leave unless you do.

961
01:03:30,809 --> 01:03:32,717
Okay, I'll dance. One dance, though. That's it.

962
01:03:32,807 --> 01:03:35,595
'Cause I really have to take a nap and...

963
01:03:35,684 --> 01:03:38,222
All right. One dance. That's it.

964
01:03:44,057 --> 01:03:45,186
Whoa!

965
01:03:48,303 --> 01:03:49,851
What's this?

966
01:03:51,390 --> 01:03:53,388
Oh! Come on! The dog is watching.

967
01:03:53,768 --> 01:03:55,017
Come on.

968
01:03:55,396 --> 01:03:57,594
- What's that? Dirty Dancing?
- Uh-huh.

969
01:03:59,353 --> 01:04:00,851
You got the girl by the neck.

970
01:04:00,931 --> 01:04:02,350
Whoa. Dipped her.

971
01:04:02,929 --> 01:04:04,058
Remember that?

972
01:04:04,188 --> 01:04:05,807
Dips. Dips.

973
01:04:15,647 --> 01:04:16,846
Am I bleeding?

974
01:04:17,146 --> 01:04:18,355
No.

975
01:04:19,264 --> 01:04:21,392
Will you get off? My back!

976
01:04:27,646 --> 01:04:28,805
Hello.

977
01:04:32,811 --> 01:04:33,850
Stop it.

978
01:04:33,940 --> 01:04:35,269
I mean it.

979
01:04:38,356 --> 01:04:40,225
This is fun though, isn't it?

980
01:04:40,314 --> 01:04:41,643
I guess.

981
01:04:42,562 --> 01:04:44,600
My aerobic workout today.

982
01:04:44,890 --> 01:04:47,188
Heart's beating like a rabbit here.

983
01:04:49,516 --> 01:04:50,515
Oh.

984
01:04:57,019 --> 01:04:58,148
Yeah.

985
01:05:09,567 --> 01:05:10,976
Hi, Chanice.

986
01:05:11,775 --> 01:05:13,024
Surprise!

987
01:05:15,402 --> 01:05:16,561
This is, um...

988
01:05:16,651 --> 01:05:17,860
Marcie.

989
01:05:21,107 --> 01:05:24,354
Yeah. Marcie, and she lives across the road.

990
01:05:24,853 --> 01:05:26,102
She came over to...

991
01:05:26,192 --> 01:05:27,690
Shut up, Buck.

992
01:05:27,980 --> 01:05:29,569
That's a good idea.

993
01:05:31,727 --> 01:05:33,735
Is this who you were out with last night?

994
01:05:37,272 --> 01:05:38,361
What?

995
01:05:38,980 --> 01:05:40,648
I didn't go out last night.

996
01:05:42,187 --> 01:05:45,274
Hey, look. Honest. Honest.
Honest. I'm telling the truth.

997
01:05:45,354 --> 01:05:46,773
You son of a bitch!

998
01:05:46,863 --> 01:05:51,019
Don't say that, okay. Chanice.
Don't walk away. Chanice!

999
01:05:51,648 --> 01:05:52,687
Chanice!

1000
01:05:52,777 --> 01:05:53,936
Hey, come here!

1001
01:05:54,026 --> 01:05:55,894
Chanice! Come here, hon.

1002
01:05:59,191 --> 01:06:00,980
Chanice, wait a minute!
Wait a minute! Let me explain!

1003
01:06:01,069 --> 01:06:02,068
Will you let me explain?

1004
01:06:04,356 --> 01:06:06,025
You're wrecking the driveway!

1005
01:06:06,524 --> 01:06:07,903
Chanice!

1006
01:06:08,942 --> 01:06:10,191
Come on!

1007
01:06:11,859 --> 01:06:13,238
I love you.

1008
01:06:30,532 --> 01:06:32,360
What flew up her nose?

1009
01:06:39,194 --> 01:06:42,531
You better go home, okay, Marcie?

1010
01:06:43,150 --> 01:06:45,358
Pick up your records. The party's over.

1011
01:06:46,357 --> 01:06:47,446
Okay?

1012
01:06:55,659 --> 01:06:59,365
So, I'll just go home and wait
for the Federal Express man.

1013
01:07:08,777 --> 01:07:10,695
Good night, Uncle Buck.

1014
01:07:11,694 --> 01:07:13,152
Good night, sweetheart.

1015
01:07:14,571 --> 01:07:15,950
Good night.

1016
01:07:23,533 --> 01:07:24,862
- Uncle Buck?
- Yeah?

1017
01:07:26,030 --> 01:07:27,449
Got a minute?

1018
01:07:27,529 --> 01:07:28,568
I got lots of minutes.

1019
01:07:29,987 --> 01:07:32,405
Now that everything's
okay with my grandfather,

1020
01:07:32,494 --> 01:07:33,693
I want to go out tomorrow night.

1021
01:07:33,903 --> 01:07:37,200
You can go crazy after I leave.
Until then, I'm not letting you out.

1022
01:07:43,994 --> 01:07:47,031
You just can't find any
way to be cool, can you?

1023
01:07:47,161 --> 01:07:48,410
You mean easy? No.

1024
01:07:48,530 --> 01:07:49,619
I mean decent.

1025
01:07:49,698 --> 01:07:50,867
You mean blind.

1026
01:07:51,367 --> 01:07:54,574
Who are you trying to
score points with, my parents?

1027
01:07:55,323 --> 01:07:57,451
How many times have they
had you here since we moved?

1028
01:07:58,201 --> 01:08:00,698
Try none until they went
up shit creek and got stuck.

1029
01:08:01,158 --> 01:08:03,446
Get used on your parents' time.

1030
01:08:04,535 --> 01:08:05,744
Hey, Buck!

1031
01:08:05,824 --> 01:08:06,913
Yeah.

1032
01:08:08,281 --> 01:08:09,990
Have a bad day today?

1033
01:08:12,907 --> 01:08:15,864
It hurts when someone screws
with your life, doesn't it?

1034
01:08:34,206 --> 01:08:35,535
Last call.

1035
01:08:40,621 --> 01:08:42,448
There you go. There you go.

1036
01:08:45,706 --> 01:08:47,535
A little for you, a little for me.

1037
01:08:53,369 --> 01:08:58,874
Boy, people used to say to me,

1038
01:08:58,954 --> 01:09:02,291
"Boy, Buck, you are one lucky son of a bitch.

1039
01:09:04,499 --> 01:09:07,167
"You got it made, Buck. You got it made."

1040
01:09:07,246 --> 01:09:08,374
And I did.

1041
01:09:09,084 --> 01:09:11,413
They'd say, "Oh, man, Buck, look at you.

1042
01:09:11,493 --> 01:09:13,789
"You don't have any kids,
you don't have any wife.

1043
01:09:13,869 --> 01:09:17,286
"You don't have a desk,
you don't have an office.

1044
01:09:17,377 --> 01:09:20,533
"You don't have a boss
to worry about."

1045
01:09:23,910 --> 01:09:25,539
They were right.

1046
01:09:25,869 --> 01:09:27,368
I had it made.

1047
01:09:32,873 --> 01:09:38,667
Only thing now is, Perce,
nobody says that anymore.

1048
01:09:44,292 --> 01:09:45,871
Oh, boy.

1049
01:09:46,710 --> 01:09:47,879
But...

1050
01:09:48,878 --> 01:09:50,706
it'll all be better tomorrow.

1051
01:09:53,464 --> 01:09:54,792
Always is.

1052
01:09:57,710 --> 01:09:59,588
Because tomorrow,

1053
01:09:59,708 --> 01:10:01,456
we go to the track,

1054
01:10:01,706 --> 01:10:05,542
win some dough, some serious dough.

1055
01:10:06,921 --> 01:10:08,040
Yeah.

1056
01:10:09,539 --> 01:10:11,547
Make a lot of money tomorrow, kiddo.

1057
01:10:12,875 --> 01:10:14,794
You want a little pretzel with your beer?

1058
01:10:20,958 --> 01:10:23,166
U.B. went to school
to pick you up, you know.

1059
01:10:23,256 --> 01:10:26,213
Tell U.B. when he gets
home that he lost, okay?

1060
01:10:26,293 --> 01:10:27,622
Lost what?

1061
01:10:28,041 --> 01:10:30,040
Just tell him. He'll know what it means.

1062
01:10:30,499 --> 01:10:31,958
I'll see you guys Sunday.

1063
01:10:32,048 --> 01:10:33,376
What day is today?

1064
01:10:33,466 --> 01:10:34,665
Friday.

1065
01:10:34,875 --> 01:10:36,124
You know what that means.

1066
01:10:36,214 --> 01:10:37,373
Jumbo party.

1067
01:10:37,583 --> 01:10:40,340
You can put that on a platter.

1068
01:11:41,253 --> 01:11:42,632
U.B. is home.

1069
01:11:42,712 --> 01:11:44,630
Tia! Tia!

1070
01:11:45,719 --> 01:11:46,968
You guys seen Tia?

1071
01:11:47,048 --> 01:11:48,337
She took a breeze, U.B.

1072
01:11:52,303 --> 01:11:55,630
And she promised me she was going
to look after you guys this evening.

1073
01:11:55,720 --> 01:11:56,719
She promised me.

1074
01:11:57,638 --> 01:11:59,087
So much for promises.

1075
01:11:59,297 --> 01:12:01,754
Does anyone in this house
know how to keep a promise?

1076
01:12:02,054 --> 01:12:04,472
I know you two guys do. I know.

1077
01:12:04,672 --> 01:12:07,509
I had somewhere important to go to tonight.

1078
01:12:08,048 --> 01:12:09,797
This is how I make my living.

1079
01:12:09,887 --> 01:12:11,755
This was very important to me.

1080
01:12:11,845 --> 01:12:13,923
This was... My whole year
was based on tonight.

1081
01:12:14,632 --> 01:12:17,090
It may be peanuts to your
dad but it's my living.

1082
01:12:18,179 --> 01:12:21,216
I have no choice, I don't care
what your parents are going to say.

1083
01:12:21,306 --> 01:12:23,214
I have to take you with me tonight.

1084
01:12:23,594 --> 01:12:24,763
Where?

1085
01:12:25,053 --> 01:12:26,551
To a racetrack.

1086
01:12:29,678 --> 01:12:30,887
Here we go.

1087
01:12:30,967 --> 01:12:32,306
You have to go to the bathroom?

1088
01:12:32,386 --> 01:12:33,465
- Nope.
- You sure?

1089
01:12:33,765 --> 01:12:34,764
Yep.

1090
01:12:34,844 --> 01:12:36,722
This is going to be fun, you know.

1091
01:12:36,802 --> 01:12:38,930
Beautiful horses, interesting people.

1092
01:12:39,549 --> 01:12:41,507
And win some serious coin, right?

1093
01:12:41,597 --> 01:12:44,425
Well, sometimes, yeah, but that's
not the real reason people go there.

1094
01:12:44,974 --> 01:12:50,549
People go because of the beautiful
horses and the colorful jockeys.

1095
01:12:52,557 --> 01:12:53,716
Bug picked up Tia?

1096
01:12:53,806 --> 01:12:54,885
Mmm-hmm.

1097
01:12:55,225 --> 01:12:57,223
And she said she was going to a party.

1098
01:12:57,722 --> 01:13:00,929
She said she'd be back Sunday.
Must be a slumber party.

1099
01:13:03,557 --> 01:13:05,975
Hop in the back. Get your belts on.

1100
01:13:07,144 --> 01:13:09,551
Let her go to a party all weekend!

1101
01:13:10,221 --> 01:13:11,759
She's old enough to know better.

1102
01:13:12,139 --> 01:13:14,307
Hell, she doesn't listen to anybody anyway.

1103
01:13:15,386 --> 01:13:16,725
Damn kids.

1104
01:14:00,394 --> 01:14:01,683
Yeah. Kobolowski Tires.

1105
01:14:02,852 --> 01:14:04,221
Hi. It's me.

1106
01:14:05,270 --> 01:14:07,098
Buck, can't you ever take a hint?

1107
01:14:07,308 --> 01:14:10,724
Chanice, it's not about me.
I got a problem at the house.

1108
01:14:11,104 --> 01:14:12,892
I need somebody to watch the kids.

1109
01:14:13,182 --> 01:14:14,931
No. I'll tell you what you need.

1110
01:14:15,021 --> 01:14:16,439
Your horse fixer's in town

1111
01:14:16,519 --> 01:14:17,898
and you need to get to the track.

1112
01:14:17,978 --> 01:14:20,016
I ran into Rog. See, he told me all about it.

1113
01:14:20,565 --> 01:14:23,063
The idiot had the nerve to ask me for a loan.

1114
01:14:23,433 --> 01:14:24,432
What's the matter?

1115
01:14:24,522 --> 01:14:27,519
You can't take children with you
when you're gonna cheat on a horserace?

1116
01:14:27,599 --> 01:14:29,187
You got some religion
out there in the 'burbs?

1117
01:14:29,357 --> 01:14:31,895
I came close. I had them in the car.

1118
01:14:32,724 --> 01:14:35,272
Can we put personal
problems aside for a second?

1119
01:14:35,981 --> 01:14:37,639
Tia took off on me.

1120
01:14:37,729 --> 01:14:39,977
I was supposed to pick her up
after school. She wasn't there.

1121
01:14:40,057 --> 01:14:41,226
What do you mean, she ran away?

1122
01:14:42,275 --> 01:14:44,273
I guess. I don't know.

1123
01:14:44,853 --> 01:14:48,479
She's 15, she's angry, she's confused,

1124
01:14:49,518 --> 01:14:51,397
and I need to find her.

1125
01:14:52,646 --> 01:14:54,224
Can you help me?

1126
01:14:55,313 --> 01:14:57,351
I'm really stuck, Chanice.

1127
01:15:01,317 --> 01:15:02,646
All right. All right.

1128
01:15:03,316 --> 01:15:05,773
I will help you because
there's kids involved in this.

1129
01:15:05,893 --> 01:15:09,400
But as far as you and I
are concerned, it is over.

1130
01:15:11,068 --> 01:15:12,317
However it has to be.

1131
01:15:14,565 --> 01:15:16,393
- I'll be there.
- Thank you.

1132
01:15:17,193 --> 01:15:18,731
For what it's worth, I'm sorry.

1133
01:15:40,941 --> 01:15:42,769
- Your car's on fire.
- Car's on fire.

1134
01:15:42,859 --> 01:15:44,987
No, no, no. It's just a little oil.

1135
01:15:45,067 --> 01:15:47,944
I'm looking for a party somewhere around here.

1136
01:15:48,024 --> 01:15:49,812
Oh, that's on Totowa Lane.

1137
01:15:49,902 --> 01:15:51,361
My niece is there.

1138
01:15:51,441 --> 01:15:52,730
Our son's there.

1139
01:15:52,820 --> 01:15:54,318
Kids.

1140
01:15:54,398 --> 01:15:56,067
I don't think you ought to
go in there with that hat on.

1141
01:15:56,147 --> 01:15:57,146
They'll kill you.

1142
01:15:57,236 --> 01:15:59,104
- Really? Thanks for the tip.
- Yeah.

1143
01:16:45,611 --> 01:16:49,317
I'm supposed to come over and watch you.

1144
01:16:52,734 --> 01:16:53,783
Hi!

1145
01:16:54,572 --> 01:16:56,990
I'm Chanice Kobolowski.
I'm Uncle Buck's friend.

1146
01:16:57,070 --> 01:16:58,778
May I see your driver's license, ma'am?

1147
01:17:00,157 --> 01:17:01,276
Yeah.

1148
01:17:01,945 --> 01:17:03,074
Sure.

1149
01:17:03,234 --> 01:17:04,573
Good idea.

1150
01:17:07,031 --> 01:17:08,529
Here! I got it!

1151
01:17:09,069 --> 01:17:10,907
See? Look.

1152
01:17:11,527 --> 01:17:12,616
Look!

1153
01:17:12,785 --> 01:17:14,534
Can you please take it out of there?

1154
01:17:14,823 --> 01:17:16,032
Take it out?

1155
01:17:39,281 --> 01:17:40,570
You okay?

1156
01:17:41,579 --> 01:17:43,407
Come on. What's the matter?

1157
01:18:08,783 --> 01:18:11,331
Coming through here. How you doing?

1158
01:18:12,490 --> 01:18:13,789
Having a good time?

1159
01:18:13,869 --> 01:18:15,787
You seen a guy named Bug around here?

1160
01:18:17,705 --> 01:18:19,453
I'm Tia Russell's uncle.

1161
01:18:19,533 --> 01:18:20,662
You girls know Tia?

1162
01:18:20,742 --> 01:18:22,620
No? She's kind of new.

1163
01:18:22,700 --> 01:18:24,119
I'm her uncle.

1164
01:18:25,408 --> 01:18:27,706
You haven't seen that Bug
around here, have you?

1165
01:18:27,956 --> 01:18:29,494
- No.
- No.

1166
01:18:29,914 --> 01:18:31,163
Nice guy.

1167
01:18:31,242 --> 01:18:33,580
Hey! Hey! Come back here with that!

1168
01:18:39,745 --> 01:18:41,453
How you doing?

1169
01:18:41,533 --> 01:18:43,121
Anybody seen Bug around here?

1170
01:18:44,750 --> 01:18:46,159
Hey, nice music.

1171
01:18:47,288 --> 01:18:48,826
Who's that? The Grass Roots?

1172
01:18:49,246 --> 01:18:50,574
I'm kidding. I know my music.

1173
01:18:56,999 --> 01:18:59,246
Stop it, please.

1174
01:19:02,204 --> 01:19:04,242
What the hell is that?

1175
01:19:05,041 --> 01:19:07,998
Hey, party time! Let's get down here, huh?

1176
01:19:08,078 --> 01:19:10,076
You seen Bug around here?

1177
01:19:10,166 --> 01:19:11,745
You seen Bug?

1178
01:19:12,584 --> 01:19:14,163
That's good stuff.

1179
01:19:15,212 --> 01:19:16,750
Keep it up. Keep it up.

1180
01:19:16,920 --> 01:19:18,459
Nice work.

1181
01:19:18,998 --> 01:19:20,746
Hey, how you doing?

1182
01:19:20,836 --> 01:19:22,165
Excuse me.

1183
01:19:22,415 --> 01:19:23,914
Crowded, huh?

1184
01:19:24,913 --> 01:19:27,410
Get down, get down, get down.

1185
01:19:27,710 --> 01:19:29,289
I don't want to do this.

1186
01:19:30,038 --> 01:19:31,836
Just relax.

1187
01:19:34,334 --> 01:19:35,703
Hello, young fellow. How are you?

1188
01:19:35,792 --> 01:19:37,831
I'm Tia Russell's uncle, Buck Russell.

1189
01:19:37,921 --> 01:19:39,749
Have you seen the Bug around?

1190
01:19:39,829 --> 01:19:41,787
No? I'm looking for him.

1191
01:19:41,877 --> 01:19:43,455
You're Tia Russell's uncle?

1192
01:19:43,545 --> 01:19:44,794
Really?

1193
01:19:44,874 --> 01:19:47,332
Hey! Give me that!

1194
01:19:47,422 --> 01:19:49,500
Take my hat, you punk!

1195
01:19:50,079 --> 01:19:51,128
Don't mention it.

1196
01:19:51,208 --> 01:19:52,287
All right, pop.

1197
01:19:54,795 --> 01:19:56,214
Have you seen a guy named Bug?

1198
01:19:56,293 --> 01:19:58,421
Everybody knows Bug. Hip, hip guy.

1199
01:19:59,331 --> 01:20:00,539
Let me through here, will you?

1200
01:20:00,629 --> 01:20:02,418
Your mother know you do that?

1201
01:20:06,464 --> 01:20:08,292
Hey, this room's taken.

1202
01:20:09,082 --> 01:20:10,420
I want to go.

1203
01:20:10,500 --> 01:20:11,669
No, you don't.

1204
01:20:14,457 --> 01:20:17,624
That door opens, I'm going
to kick somebody's ass!

1205
01:20:19,082 --> 01:20:20,171
Do you hear me?

1206
01:22:12,467 --> 01:22:13,556
Tia.

1207
01:22:32,468 --> 01:22:34,057
You were right.

1208
01:22:35,805 --> 01:22:38,593
Everything you said would happen happened.

1209
01:22:40,431 --> 01:22:41,640
I don't want to talk about it.

1210
01:22:41,720 --> 01:22:43,178
I just want to get you home.

1211
01:23:18,516 --> 01:23:20,094
Is this a trick?

1212
01:23:25,309 --> 01:23:26,348
No.

1213
01:23:30,265 --> 01:23:32,183
You know what happened?

1214
01:23:34,890 --> 01:23:36,019
Yeah.

1215
01:23:39,686 --> 01:23:42,603
Are you going to tell my parents
about everything that's been going on?

1216
01:23:45,431 --> 01:23:46,430
No.

1217
01:23:49,187 --> 01:23:50,266
Thanks.

1218
01:23:54,682 --> 01:23:57,809
I've been riding your butt all
week about how you live your life.

1219
01:24:01,266 --> 01:24:04,263
I realize maybe somebody
should have been riding mine.

1220
01:24:04,892 --> 01:24:08,519
I'm probably the last guy in
the world you'd want to help,

1221
01:24:11,057 --> 01:24:14,354
but I really could use your
advice, vis-a-vis Chanice.

1222
01:24:15,273 --> 01:24:21,937
I've been stringing her along
for about eight years now.

1223
01:24:23,106 --> 01:24:25,933
Maybe you could figure out
what the hell is wrong with me.

1224
01:24:26,852 --> 01:24:29,310
I did such a great job
earning your trust and admiration,

1225
01:24:29,400 --> 01:24:32,557
I'm confused why I can't
do the same with Chanice.

1226
01:24:42,018 --> 01:24:43,856
You know there's

1227
01:24:46,484 --> 01:24:52,229
one family charity case
that loves you very much.

1228
01:24:55,066 --> 01:24:56,395
I'm sorry.

1229
01:24:57,104 --> 01:24:58,603
Hey, come on.

1230
01:24:59,811 --> 01:25:01,610
Nothing to be sorry about.

1231
01:25:02,729 --> 01:25:06,315
I'm just kind of glad I got
a chance to know you again.

1232
01:25:11,441 --> 01:25:13,269
Did you do anything to Bug?

1233
01:25:20,232 --> 01:25:24,728
Oh, my God! What did you do?

1234
01:25:36,028 --> 01:25:37,526
You shithead!

1235
01:25:37,606 --> 01:25:39,195
I could have suffocated here!

1236
01:25:39,275 --> 01:25:41,772
Um, do you know what
I'd like you to do?

1237
01:25:41,862 --> 01:25:43,571
Actually, you could be
doing both of us a favor.

1238
01:25:43,651 --> 01:25:45,899
I'd like you to apologize
to the lady, please.

1239
01:25:46,568 --> 01:25:50,155
I'm sorry!

1240
01:25:50,235 --> 01:25:51,903
Okay, asshole?

1241
01:25:51,983 --> 01:25:53,691
I'm sorry!

1242
01:25:53,781 --> 01:25:57,148
I don't know if I told you this
or not, but I'm an amateur dentist?

1243
01:25:58,607 --> 01:25:59,906
Oh, yes. He is.

1244
01:26:08,907 --> 01:26:10,236
I'm sorry.

1245
01:26:11,115 --> 01:26:12,364
Get him out of there.

1246
01:26:12,444 --> 01:26:13,523
Yeah?

1247
01:26:13,903 --> 01:26:15,531
It was halfhearted.
We'll let him. Come on, here we go.

1248
01:26:15,611 --> 01:26:16,610
I'm really sorry.

1249
01:26:16,690 --> 01:26:18,818
I'm sure you are. I'm sure you are.

1250
01:26:18,908 --> 01:26:21,196
Let me just get you...

1251
01:26:21,486 --> 01:26:24,443
I didn't mean to hurt anybody.

1252
01:26:24,533 --> 01:26:25,652
There you go. There you go.

1253
01:26:27,200 --> 01:26:28,699
Oh, I'm sorry.

1254
01:26:35,862 --> 01:26:36,861
Shall we?

1255
01:26:36,951 --> 01:26:38,070
Yeah.

1256
01:26:44,614 --> 01:26:47,741
Yeah? Well, come on back,
and I'll kick your ass, man!

1257
01:26:47,821 --> 01:26:49,989
Chicken shit! You're dead!

1258
01:26:51,368 --> 01:26:52,487
Shit.

1259
01:26:58,781 --> 01:27:01,109
I'm gonna sue your balls off, man!

1260
01:27:02,028 --> 01:27:04,196
Why don't you come again?

1261
01:27:04,286 --> 01:27:05,655
Come on!

1262
01:27:06,194 --> 01:27:07,653
Come on, man!

1263
01:27:07,743 --> 01:27:10,780
I'm going to sue you and I'm
going to sue your whole family!

1264
01:27:11,279 --> 01:27:13,987
Okay, pal. Time for a golf lesson.

1265
01:27:14,616 --> 01:27:16,654
My dad's a lawyer, man! You're history!

1266
01:27:17,244 --> 01:27:19,112
A little fine wood.

1267
01:27:20,451 --> 01:27:22,659
Hey. What?

1268
01:27:23,368 --> 01:27:25,037
What? What are you doing, man?

1269
01:27:26,325 --> 01:27:27,614
Shit.

1270
01:27:28,403 --> 01:27:29,702
You're history, man! You're wasted!

1271
01:27:29,782 --> 01:27:31,700
I'm gonna sue you for
everything you've got, man!

1272
01:27:32,240 --> 01:27:34,488
You're gonna be broke!
So come on, come and get me!

1273
01:27:36,406 --> 01:27:38,494
You bastard! Aah!

1274
01:27:39,034 --> 01:27:40,322
Yes, sir!

1275
01:27:40,872 --> 01:27:42,530
You son of a bitch!

1276
01:27:42,620 --> 01:27:43,739
That hurt!

1277
01:27:43,909 --> 01:27:46,616
Hey, hey, hey. I'm not sorry, all right?

1278
01:27:47,905 --> 01:27:50,243
I ain't sorry for shit!

1279
01:27:53,330 --> 01:27:55,698
What do you see in that guy anyway?

1280
01:27:56,497 --> 01:27:58,955
I can't for the life of
me figure that one out.

1281
01:27:59,614 --> 01:28:02,702
Don't answer. Don't answer. You don't have to.

1282
01:28:05,789 --> 01:28:08,786
I appreciate the confession, Tia.
Thank you. Thanks a lot.

1283
01:28:08,916 --> 01:28:10,324
But my problems with Buck

1284
01:28:10,414 --> 01:28:13,621
go a whole lot deeper than a
misunderstanding with a neighborlady.

1285
01:28:14,241 --> 01:28:16,369
Don't you think he loves you?

1286
01:28:17,788 --> 01:28:19,706
If he does, he'd never say it.

1287
01:28:20,575 --> 01:28:21,624
What if he did?

1288
01:28:21,704 --> 01:28:23,952
Then I would suspect
he needed a new set of tires.

1289
01:28:25,331 --> 01:28:28,118
Seriously.

1290
01:28:28,538 --> 01:28:31,075
You're very sweet to talk about this

1291
01:28:31,535 --> 01:28:33,623
but I don't think you
understand the bigger picture.

1292
01:28:33,953 --> 01:28:37,409
See, Buck's a charming man who
wants to remain a boy forever.

1293
01:28:37,909 --> 01:28:38,908
Boy?

1294
01:28:39,248 --> 01:28:42,285
And at my age, that doesn't
make for a lasting relationship.

1295
01:28:45,292 --> 01:28:47,660
I think he'd make a
wonderful husband and father.

1296
01:28:48,249 --> 01:28:50,117
- You do?
- Oh, yeah.

1297
01:28:50,627 --> 01:28:52,575
My sister and brother adore him.

1298
01:28:53,834 --> 01:28:57,830
He really has changed since
he's been here this week.

1299
01:28:58,789 --> 01:29:00,618
He really has changed.

1300
01:29:00,997 --> 01:29:02,626
He's responsible

1301
01:29:03,415 --> 01:29:05,243
and caring and loving

1302
01:29:06,542 --> 01:29:09,120
and enthusiastic...

1303
01:29:10,379 --> 01:29:11,378
Energetic.

1304
01:29:11,707 --> 01:29:13,496
And energetic and

1305
01:29:14,625 --> 01:29:16,123
decent

1306
01:29:17,462 --> 01:29:18,791
and kind

1307
01:29:21,878 --> 01:29:23,167
and humble

1308
01:29:23,287 --> 01:29:25,295
and honest and forthright.

1309
01:29:26,084 --> 01:29:27,123
Sense of humor.

1310
01:29:27,213 --> 01:29:29,291
And he's really got
a great sense of humor.

1311
01:29:29,751 --> 01:29:31,789
Did he by any chance
put you up to this?

1312
01:29:32,378 --> 01:29:35,455
- No! Oh, no.
- Mmm-mmm.

1313
01:29:35,795 --> 01:29:38,333
No, I've just gathered this
from my own observations.

1314
01:29:39,042 --> 01:29:40,171
No?

1315
01:29:40,251 --> 01:29:41,829
It's just the way he is.

1316
01:29:41,919 --> 01:29:43,128
Really?

1317
01:29:44,457 --> 01:29:45,456
Um!

1318
01:29:49,962 --> 01:29:50,961
Really?

1319
01:29:52,460 --> 01:29:53,539
Oh, yeah!

1320
01:29:53,628 --> 01:29:54,747
So unlike him.

1321
01:30:03,549 --> 01:30:04,548
Ow!

1322
01:30:11,002 --> 01:30:12,541
Check this out.

1323
01:30:18,585 --> 01:30:19,964
Hi, honey!

1324
01:30:20,673 --> 01:30:22,462
Is the coffee ready?

1325
01:30:23,421 --> 01:30:25,049
A little thirsty.

1326
01:30:25,629 --> 01:30:28,756
By the way, I have
told you I loved you,

1327
01:30:29,585 --> 01:30:32,083
and it wasn't for tires, sweetheart.

1328
01:30:32,462 --> 01:30:33,881
It was for shocks, remember?

1329
01:30:39,546 --> 01:30:41,714
Oh, are they sweethearts, or what?

1330
01:30:41,794 --> 01:30:43,712
This one's smart as a whip.

1331
01:30:43,962 --> 01:30:45,670
I'm going to miss them like crazy.

1332
01:30:45,760 --> 01:30:48,128
They're beautiful children.
What happened to you?

1333
01:30:48,677 --> 01:30:51,175
Recessive gene, skips
every nine generations.

1334
01:30:51,255 --> 01:30:52,384
I got it this time.

1335
01:30:52,464 --> 01:30:53,673
- Mmm-hmm.
- Tragic.

1336
01:30:53,883 --> 01:30:55,751
It isn't so bad, is it?

1337
01:30:56,510 --> 01:30:57,589
What?

1338
01:30:57,669 --> 01:30:59,048
The house, the family, the kids.

1339
01:30:59,128 --> 01:31:01,086
Oh, yeah. No, it's great.

1340
01:31:01,176 --> 01:31:02,175
This is great.

1341
01:31:03,044 --> 01:31:05,212
We should have done this a long time ago,

1342
01:31:05,302 --> 01:31:07,260
something like this, you know, you and I.

1343
01:31:21,966 --> 01:31:23,715
They're here!

1344
01:31:29,010 --> 01:31:30,678
What are we doing?

1345
01:31:32,007 --> 01:31:35,304
Well, your mother, you see, and your sister

1346
01:31:35,514 --> 01:31:38,301
have to sort some things out.

1347
01:31:38,421 --> 01:31:39,680
They have to sort some things out.

1348
01:31:39,760 --> 01:31:41,928
So we're going to be very quiet for them.

1349
01:31:42,008 --> 01:31:44,555
So why don't we put a button on it like this

1350
01:31:48,552 --> 01:31:51,799
and a zipper, like that, and a lock.

1351
01:31:53,807 --> 01:31:56,305
I can't talk at all. I throw the key away.

1352
01:32:50,474 --> 01:32:52,183
It's going to be real different.

1353
01:32:53,601 --> 01:32:55,010
I promise.

1354
01:32:55,809 --> 01:32:57,138
I love you.

1355
01:33:10,016 --> 01:33:11,135
Shit!

1356
01:33:11,265 --> 01:33:12,514
Bye!

1357
01:33:12,604 --> 01:33:14,182
Bye, Uncle Buck!

1358
01:33:14,722 --> 01:33:17,599
Well, could I get
out the door, please?

1359
01:33:17,679 --> 01:33:18,808
I'm going!

1360
01:33:18,888 --> 01:33:20,386
Well, this is heavy.

1361
01:33:20,476 --> 01:33:21,555
Bye!

1362
01:33:21,975 --> 01:33:23,973
Thanks again, Buck.

1363
01:33:24,103 --> 01:33:27,310
Next time you're downtown,
maybe we can go out for a coffee.

1364
01:33:29,977 --> 01:33:31,017
Okay.

1365
01:33:32,355 --> 01:33:35,143
We really had a good time.
I know it's kind of ridiculous.

1366
01:33:35,313 --> 01:33:36,561
We did leave the house
a little messy.

1367
01:33:36,641 --> 01:33:38,350
We did try our best.
You know, we're not so good at...

1368
01:33:38,430 --> 01:33:40,058
- Chanice.
- What?

1369
01:33:40,138 --> 01:33:41,557
We're going home, we're not dying.

1370
01:33:41,976 --> 01:33:43,515
I'm saying good-bye, is that all right?

1371
01:33:43,685 --> 01:33:45,063
- All right.
- Nice guy, is he?

1372
01:33:45,143 --> 01:33:46,682
Tell the neighbors we're really sorry

1373
01:33:46,772 --> 01:33:49,100
about having that thing parked
in the driveway all week.

1374
01:33:49,190 --> 01:33:51,517
He's getting a new company car on Monday.

1375
01:33:51,597 --> 01:33:54,395
The hell I am! The beast is
good for another 100,000 miles.

1376
01:33:54,475 --> 01:33:55,893
Yeah, well, it's too bad that you're not.

1377
01:33:55,973 --> 01:33:57,312
That's funny, Chanice. That's good.

1378
01:33:57,562 --> 01:33:58,561
See what I put up with?

1379
01:33:58,641 --> 01:34:01,598
Don't drive fast. I'm not
fixing anymore tickets for you.

1380
01:39:23,499 --> 01:39:25,088
Wake up!