1 00:01:39,300 --> 00:01:42,100 Just remember don't mention the communists. 2 00:01:42,100 --> 00:01:44,200 Calvin's a great guy, but he's a little--you know. 3 00:01:44,200 --> 00:01:46,200 -Nutty. -What's his wife like? 4 00:01:46,200 --> 00:01:48,000 You know...housewife. 5 00:01:48,100 --> 00:01:49,800 Likes to cook, pregnant. 6 00:01:49,800 --> 00:01:51,100 Normal, then. 7 00:01:51,200 --> 00:01:53,000 I wouldn't go that far. 8 00:01:53,100 --> 00:01:55,400 -Helen! -Oh, hi, Betty. Hi, Dave. 9 00:01:55,400 --> 00:01:57,600 Just look at you. 10 00:01:57,600 --> 00:01:58,700 Any day now. 11 00:01:58,800 --> 00:02:00,000 Say hi to my sister Ruth and her husband. 12 00:02:00,000 --> 00:02:02,200 Tell me if you've heard this one. 13 00:02:02,200 --> 00:02:05,000 A duck walks into a drugstore. 14 00:02:05,000 --> 00:02:07,400 He says, "I'd like some lip gloss." 15 00:02:07,400 --> 00:02:10,500 The clerk says, "Certainly, sir. Will this be cash or check?" 16 00:02:10,500 --> 00:02:14,100 The duck says, "Put it on my bill." 17 00:02:16,100 --> 00:02:17,400 Oh, brother. 18 00:02:17,400 --> 00:02:19,800 He was the golden boy professor at Cal Tech... 19 00:02:20,500 --> 00:02:22,300 but then he started inventing things. 20 00:02:22,300 --> 00:02:24,400 He suddenly became very rich. 21 00:02:24,500 --> 00:02:26,900 And that was it. He quit teaching. 22 00:02:27,700 --> 00:02:30,000 -How's that? -Just what the doctor ordered. 23 00:02:31,900 --> 00:02:34,400 Calvin spends all of his time out there... 24 00:02:34,500 --> 00:02:36,700 tinkering around in the workshop. 25 00:02:36,700 --> 00:02:39,200 If you ask me, it's all very strange. 26 00:02:39,200 --> 00:02:40,300 Same is true of batteries. 27 00:02:40,400 --> 00:02:43,200 I could take a simple yacht battery... 28 00:02:43,200 --> 00:02:45,900 and rig it to last a decade, easily. 29 00:02:46,600 --> 00:02:48,500 Say, Helen, what does Calvin think... 30 00:02:48,600 --> 00:02:50,600 about this trouble down in Cuba? 31 00:02:50,600 --> 00:02:53,900 Oh, for heaven's sakes, please don't bring that up. 32 00:03:02,700 --> 00:03:06,000 I'd say my baseball card collection is as complete... 33 00:03:06,100 --> 00:03:07,800 as any one I've ever seen. 34 00:03:10,200 --> 00:03:12,200 Calvin! Kennedy is going toe-to-toe with Khruschev... 35 00:03:12,200 --> 00:03:13,900 on television right now. 36 00:03:13,900 --> 00:03:15,200 Ooh, boy. 37 00:03:16,400 --> 00:03:18,000 On the island of Cuba. 38 00:03:18,000 --> 00:03:20,400 Unmistakable evidence has established the fact... 39 00:03:20,400 --> 00:03:23,800 that a series of offensive missile sites... 40 00:03:23,800 --> 00:03:28,000 is now in preparation on that imprisoned island. 41 00:03:44,700 --> 00:03:48,300 Tower, this is Wolf One. I got five miles to the overhead. 42 00:03:48,300 --> 00:03:49,900 Wolf One, Tower. Report the numbers. 43 00:03:50,000 --> 00:03:51,600 You're number one for the overhead. 44 00:03:54,600 --> 00:03:57,000 Tower, this is Wolf One. I got a problem here. 45 00:03:57,000 --> 00:04:00,200 State your problem, Wolf One. Are you declaring an emergency? 46 00:04:00,200 --> 00:04:02,000 Stand by, One. 47 00:04:02,000 --> 00:04:04,800 Additional sites appear to be designed... 48 00:04:04,900 --> 00:04:07,500 for intermediate-range ballistic missiles... 49 00:04:07,600 --> 00:04:09,800 and thus capable of striking most of the major cities... 50 00:04:09,800 --> 00:04:11,600 in the western hemisphere. 51 00:04:12,800 --> 00:04:14,300 Folks. 52 00:04:14,400 --> 00:04:17,400 Given this extraordinary turn of events... 53 00:04:17,500 --> 00:04:20,200 I think it's prudent we cut this evening short. 54 00:04:20,300 --> 00:04:22,200 I'm sure this Cuban thing will resolve itself... 55 00:04:22,300 --> 00:04:24,800 but in the meantime, I suggest we take... 56 00:04:24,800 --> 00:04:27,300 a prayerful watch and wait stance. 57 00:04:29,000 --> 00:04:30,700 OK, folks, let's go. 58 00:04:33,100 --> 00:04:34,700 -My coat. -Oh, here you go. 59 00:04:40,300 --> 00:04:41,400 What did I tell you? 60 00:04:47,000 --> 00:04:49,200 Well, I'm certainly not gonna let this pot roast go to waste. 61 00:04:49,200 --> 00:04:51,000 Oh, Calvin, would you put that seat cushion... 62 00:04:51,000 --> 00:04:52,500 back on the lawn chair, honey? 63 00:04:52,500 --> 00:04:54,600 Shouldn't we at least turn off the phonograph? 64 00:04:54,700 --> 00:04:56,300 It shuts off automatically. 65 00:04:56,300 --> 00:04:57,900 Oh. Did you make it to do that? 66 00:04:58,000 --> 00:04:59,000 They all do. 67 00:04:59,900 --> 00:05:01,000 I never know anymore. 68 00:05:03,200 --> 00:05:06,700 I bet that's a fighter jet on its way to Key West. 69 00:05:07,800 --> 00:05:09,000 Good luck, amigo. 70 00:05:09,000 --> 00:05:10,400 An emergency has been declared. 71 00:05:10,400 --> 00:05:12,600 I repeat, an emergency has been declared. 72 00:05:12,600 --> 00:05:13,800 You hear that? 73 00:05:14,300 --> 00:05:15,900 I'll come back for the radio. 74 00:05:17,200 --> 00:05:20,000 I wish you would have at least let me do the dishes. 75 00:05:20,000 --> 00:05:21,100 It's not gonna be that easy... 76 00:05:21,200 --> 00:05:23,400 to get all that dried-on food off my nice plates. 77 00:05:23,400 --> 00:05:26,300 I just hope those plates are not radioactive by tomorrow. 78 00:05:26,300 --> 00:05:28,600 Cheese is particularly troublesome. 79 00:05:28,600 --> 00:05:30,700 I've got secondaries of an engine fire. 80 00:05:30,800 --> 00:05:33,500 I'm gonna need to find a clear area to eject. 81 00:05:33,600 --> 00:05:35,700 Roger, Wolf One. Can you make it to the ocean? 82 00:05:38,500 --> 00:05:40,200 Roger that, Tower. 83 00:05:40,300 --> 00:05:44,600 I'm marking the one-eight-zero radio for five... 84 00:05:44,700 --> 00:05:46,500 and ejecting, Tower. 85 00:05:46,600 --> 00:05:47,900 Roger, Wolf One. 86 00:06:00,600 --> 00:06:03,000 How long will we have to stay down here? 87 00:06:03,100 --> 00:06:05,500 For this thing to blow over could take days. 88 00:06:05,500 --> 00:06:06,600 Days? 89 00:06:06,600 --> 00:06:08,400 What if I go into labor? 90 00:06:08,500 --> 00:06:10,700 That could happen any time now. 91 00:06:10,700 --> 00:06:11,800 I've read up on it. 92 00:06:11,800 --> 00:06:14,600 If I have to, I'll deliver the baby myself. 93 00:06:40,200 --> 00:06:41,600 Home, sweet home. 94 00:06:42,800 --> 00:06:43,900 To you, maybe. 95 00:06:55,400 --> 00:06:56,500 Are you all right? 96 00:06:56,500 --> 00:06:57,900 I think so. 97 00:07:01,800 --> 00:07:04,000 It's happened! 98 00:07:04,100 --> 00:07:05,300 Look at that heat! 99 00:07:05,300 --> 00:07:07,300 All my surface indicators... 100 00:07:07,400 --> 00:07:10,000 knocked out! Oh, Lord! 101 00:07:10,000 --> 00:07:11,500 It's happened! 102 00:07:18,100 --> 00:07:19,400 What was that noise? 103 00:07:22,000 --> 00:07:23,100 - The locks. - The locks? 104 00:07:27,800 --> 00:07:31,200 To keep us from trying to leave. 105 00:07:31,200 --> 00:07:35,000 There's a radiation half-life after an atomic blast. 106 00:07:35,000 --> 00:07:36,600 -It lasts thirty-five years. - Thirty-five years? 107 00:07:39,900 --> 00:07:44,200 Then after that, it's safe to go up. 108 00:07:47,100 --> 00:07:48,800 According to Cal Tech... 109 00:07:48,900 --> 00:07:51,700 this Webber guy was a bona fide genius... 110 00:07:51,700 --> 00:07:54,000 but a borderline nut case. 111 00:07:54,000 --> 00:07:55,200 He and Mrs. Nut Case... 112 00:07:55,200 --> 00:07:56,800 must have been out here when the plane hit. 113 00:07:57,700 --> 00:08:00,400 Unless we get a postcard or something, that'd be my guess. 114 00:08:00,400 --> 00:08:01,500 What about relatives? 115 00:08:01,600 --> 00:08:02,900 They're all back east. 116 00:08:03,800 --> 00:08:07,200 Neighbors said the guy spent day and night out here. 117 00:08:07,200 --> 00:08:10,700 She'd bring him sandwiches and hot Dr. Pepper. 118 00:08:12,800 --> 00:08:14,000 He drank it hot? 119 00:08:16,200 --> 00:08:17,800 Good God. 120 00:08:20,300 --> 00:08:22,400 Chilly? You shouldn't be. 121 00:08:23,200 --> 00:08:24,800 Temperature's a nice seventy-three degrees. 122 00:08:24,800 --> 00:08:27,000 Maybe I've just got the creeps. 123 00:08:27,000 --> 00:08:29,100 How could you? This is just like home. 124 00:08:32,100 --> 00:08:33,200 No, Calvin! This is different. 125 00:08:33,200 --> 00:08:34,700 Believe me. 126 00:08:34,800 --> 00:08:36,400 Would you like a tranquilizer? 127 00:08:37,600 --> 00:08:39,100 You've got tranquilizers? 128 00:08:39,200 --> 00:08:40,900 I told you I have everything. 129 00:08:43,600 --> 00:08:44,700 What? 130 00:08:46,100 --> 00:08:48,000 Oh, hon. 131 00:08:51,600 --> 00:08:52,700 Just breathe. 132 00:08:52,700 --> 00:08:54,200 I'll get my stuff. 133 00:09:28,800 --> 00:09:30,000 Is there a problem? 134 00:09:30,000 --> 00:09:32,000 No, Calvin. Babies cry. 135 00:09:32,800 --> 00:09:33,900 I've noticed. 136 00:09:34,000 --> 00:09:35,400 What shall we call him? 137 00:09:35,400 --> 00:09:37,300 I don't know. 138 00:09:37,300 --> 00:09:39,500 Well, I was thinking in the light of situation... 139 00:09:40,200 --> 00:09:42,200 we should call him Adam. 140 00:09:42,200 --> 00:09:43,600 That's not sacrilegious, is it? 141 00:09:43,700 --> 00:09:46,200 No. I think it's just right. 142 00:09:47,400 --> 00:09:49,500 See, I flick this switch... 143 00:09:50,200 --> 00:09:53,300 and the image is projected onto a mirror... 144 00:09:53,400 --> 00:09:55,300 and the picture comes out here... 145 00:09:55,300 --> 00:09:56,600 and it's perfect. 146 00:10:05,700 --> 00:10:08,300 Well, almost perfect. 147 00:10:09,200 --> 00:10:11,600 Lord, bless this food... 148 00:10:11,600 --> 00:10:12,900 this family... 149 00:10:13,000 --> 00:10:15,000 and make us ever mindful... 150 00:10:15,000 --> 00:10:16,800 of the needs of others. Amen. 151 00:10:17,300 --> 00:10:18,600 Let's eat. 152 00:10:36,500 --> 00:10:37,700 Out here, hon. 153 00:10:37,800 --> 00:10:39,400 Oh, there you are. 154 00:10:40,600 --> 00:10:42,700 Looked all over for you. 155 00:10:44,400 --> 00:10:45,500 You wanted to see me? 156 00:10:45,500 --> 00:10:47,300 Yes. You ready, Adam? 157 00:10:47,300 --> 00:10:48,600 Watch this. 158 00:10:50,000 --> 00:10:52,000 He can stand up all by himself. 159 00:10:52,100 --> 00:10:53,200 Show Daddy. 160 00:10:53,200 --> 00:10:54,700 All by himself. 161 00:10:54,800 --> 00:10:56,100 That's my guy. 162 00:10:56,100 --> 00:10:57,200 Stand up. 163 00:10:57,200 --> 00:10:58,700 My son. 164 00:10:59,600 --> 00:11:01,200 Up, Adam... 165 00:11:01,300 --> 00:11:02,700 to the moon. 166 00:11:17,400 --> 00:11:19,300 I never seen a septic tank that looked like that. 167 00:11:19,300 --> 00:11:20,400 Well, don't fool with it. 168 00:11:20,500 --> 00:11:22,800 If it is a septic tank, I sure as hell don't want to open it. 169 00:11:22,800 --> 00:11:24,600 We'll just lay the foundation over it. 170 00:11:42,600 --> 00:11:44,900 I'm gonna need two more banana splits and a Cherry Coke. 171 00:11:45,000 --> 00:11:46,700 You bet, Mom. Comin' up. 172 00:11:46,700 --> 00:11:49,200 Oh, by the way, Mom, thanks for the job. 173 00:11:50,000 --> 00:11:51,200 Buck fifteen an hour. 174 00:11:55,200 --> 00:11:57,000 Your husband is crazy. 175 00:12:22,700 --> 00:12:23,900 Hook off the jab. 176 00:12:25,000 --> 00:12:26,100 That's right. 177 00:12:32,100 --> 00:12:34,900 Four, five. 178 00:12:34,900 --> 00:12:36,600 Five, six. 179 00:12:36,600 --> 00:12:38,000 And six, spin. 180 00:12:47,500 --> 00:12:49,100 May I cut in? 181 00:12:49,100 --> 00:12:50,700 You certainly may. 182 00:12:50,700 --> 00:12:52,100 Thank you, son. 183 00:13:20,600 --> 00:13:22,800 What the hell kind of music is that? 184 00:13:24,200 --> 00:13:25,600 Oh, man. 185 00:13:26,500 --> 00:13:28,100 I'm not sure I like that. 186 00:13:47,600 --> 00:13:50,000 These are stock certificates. 187 00:13:50,000 --> 00:13:52,900 Your Mom and I bought them, for you. 188 00:13:54,000 --> 00:13:55,100 Of course, they're worthless now... 189 00:13:55,100 --> 00:13:57,900 but at one time they were quite valuable. 190 00:13:58,800 --> 00:14:01,500 They're pretty. Could I have them? 191 00:14:01,600 --> 00:14:03,100 Sure. 192 00:14:03,100 --> 00:14:07,000 Now let's move on to our French exam. 193 00:14:07,800 --> 00:14:10,200 Latin exam, Dad. It's Tuesday. 194 00:14:12,000 --> 00:14:14,500 Gosh, it is Tuesday. 195 00:14:14,500 --> 00:14:16,500 Time flies, doesn't it? 196 00:14:16,600 --> 00:14:18,000 Tempus fugit. 197 00:14:29,500 --> 00:14:33,100 You have a wonderful sense of humor, son, I must say. 198 00:14:34,700 --> 00:14:37,700 The acorn does not fall very far from the tree. 199 00:14:39,900 --> 00:14:40,900 This is wonderful. 200 00:14:41,000 --> 00:14:43,900 That's my baseball card collection. 201 00:14:43,900 --> 00:14:45,200 It's yours now. 202 00:14:47,000 --> 00:14:48,100 What's baseball? 203 00:14:48,100 --> 00:14:49,300 It's a game, son. 204 00:14:49,300 --> 00:14:52,100 I can explain it pretty easily. 205 00:14:52,100 --> 00:14:54,500 You see, there's a pitcher. 206 00:14:54,500 --> 00:14:55,800 Oh, like a painting? 207 00:14:56,800 --> 00:14:59,300 No. A pit-cher. 208 00:14:59,300 --> 00:15:00,500 Like one of Mom's? 209 00:15:01,500 --> 00:15:03,600 No. There's a man who throws the ball... 210 00:15:03,600 --> 00:15:05,500 to a man who has a bat. 211 00:15:05,500 --> 00:15:07,500 Oh, the nocturnal flying mammal. 212 00:15:25,100 --> 00:15:26,300 I'm sellin' this place. 213 00:15:26,300 --> 00:15:28,500 I want out of this hellhole. 214 00:15:31,800 --> 00:15:32,800 Could I, uh... 215 00:15:33,500 --> 00:15:34,800 Buy it from me? 216 00:15:35,100 --> 00:15:36,700 Yeah! Yeah, that's it! 217 00:15:36,900 --> 00:15:38,800 I'll give it to you. No money down. 218 00:15:38,900 --> 00:15:39,800 Cool! 219 00:15:40,300 --> 00:15:42,800 I'm only gonna explain this one more time. 220 00:15:42,900 --> 00:15:45,500 The runner on second goes to third. 221 00:15:45,600 --> 00:15:47,500 It's--He's out there. 222 00:15:47,500 --> 00:15:48,600 00:15:52,700 Because he's forced out. It's--it's a force. 224 00:15:52,700 --> 00:15:53,900 Then why go there? 225 00:15:53,900 --> 00:15:56,900 Because...he must. 226 00:15:58,400 --> 00:15:59,500 Coming. 227 00:16:02,300 --> 00:16:03,900 Yes, dear? 228 00:16:03,900 --> 00:16:05,900 You get the presents, I'll get the lights. 229 00:16:05,900 --> 00:16:07,200 You bet. 230 00:16:08,700 --> 00:16:13,200 Happy birthday to you 231 00:16:13,300 --> 00:16:16,900 And many more 232 00:16:19,100 --> 00:16:21,600 Thanks, Mom. Thank you, Dad. 233 00:16:21,600 --> 00:16:23,700 -Blow out the candles. -Make a wish. 234 00:16:30,300 --> 00:16:31,400 Here. 235 00:16:40,300 --> 00:16:43,200 Oh, boy! A jacket! 236 00:16:43,200 --> 00:16:45,200 Your mom made that all by herself. 237 00:16:45,300 --> 00:16:46,500 -No kidding? -No kidding. 238 00:16:48,000 --> 00:16:49,800 Who else could have done it? 239 00:16:49,900 --> 00:16:51,400 I made these. 240 00:16:59,800 --> 00:17:01,900 Holy cow. 241 00:17:02,000 --> 00:17:03,900 What the heck are these? 242 00:17:04,000 --> 00:17:05,500 It's your roller skates. Yup. 243 00:17:05,600 --> 00:17:07,300 I redesigned them. 244 00:17:07,300 --> 00:17:10,100 These are really swell. I mean swell. 245 00:17:10,200 --> 00:17:12,100 What did you wish for, son? 246 00:17:12,100 --> 00:17:13,200 If he tells, it won't come true. 247 00:17:13,300 --> 00:17:16,100 Oh, that's a bunch of baloney. My family never believed that. 248 00:17:16,200 --> 00:17:18,800 Well, we did in my family. 249 00:17:18,900 --> 00:17:20,700 I wished that I could meet a girl. 250 00:17:22,300 --> 00:17:24,200 I hope a nice one? 251 00:17:24,300 --> 00:17:25,500 Yes, ma'am. 252 00:17:25,600 --> 00:17:27,400 One that doesn't glow in the dark, I hope. 253 00:17:27,500 --> 00:17:30,000 Calvin Webber, what a thing to say. 254 00:17:30,100 --> 00:17:31,900 Well, we'll be going up in two years. 255 00:17:32,000 --> 00:17:33,400 We'll know then. 256 00:17:33,400 --> 00:17:34,500 I'm very hopeful. 257 00:17:35,800 --> 00:17:37,000 Me, too. 258 00:17:37,800 --> 00:17:40,000 You know, when we do go up... 259 00:17:40,000 --> 00:17:41,400 I'm gonna miss this place. 260 00:17:44,400 --> 00:17:45,500 How about you, hon? 261 00:17:51,300 --> 00:17:53,300 Would you please excuse me? 262 00:17:54,300 --> 00:17:55,900 No, no, don't--don't get up. 263 00:18:49,700 --> 00:18:51,300 Should we say a prayer first? 264 00:18:51,300 --> 00:18:52,900 Just open the door. 265 00:19:07,600 --> 00:19:09,000 Long time. 266 00:19:12,300 --> 00:19:14,900 Well, it's dirty, but... 267 00:19:18,500 --> 00:19:20,100 it seems to be OK. 268 00:19:23,900 --> 00:19:25,700 I know you're happy. 269 00:19:26,700 --> 00:19:28,800 Do we just go on up? 270 00:19:29,000 --> 00:19:30,200 No, son. 271 00:19:30,300 --> 00:19:33,500 Now is the time we must be at our most cautious. 272 00:19:33,500 --> 00:19:34,700 We wait for night. 273 00:19:34,700 --> 00:19:36,100 Oh, shit! 274 00:19:37,300 --> 00:19:38,900 Helen Thomas Webber... 275 00:19:38,900 --> 00:19:42,100 maybe we have been down here a little too long. 276 00:19:43,400 --> 00:19:44,700 Pardon her French, son. 277 00:19:44,800 --> 00:19:46,700 "Shit" is French? 278 00:19:48,000 --> 00:19:49,600 Well, it's archaic French. 279 00:19:49,600 --> 00:19:52,500 It's a 16th century colloquialism... 280 00:19:52,500 --> 00:19:54,200 meaning roughly "Good." 281 00:19:54,300 --> 00:19:56,200 Your father's right. 282 00:19:56,300 --> 00:19:59,200 Well...shit! 283 00:20:15,700 --> 00:20:18,100 Earthquake! Another earthquake! 284 00:20:18,700 --> 00:20:21,400 Let her come. Let her come. Let's get this over with! 285 00:20:30,900 --> 00:20:32,300 Oh, God. 286 00:20:37,700 --> 00:20:39,500 Oh, my God. 287 00:20:39,500 --> 00:20:41,400 Oh, God, save me. 288 00:20:44,100 --> 00:20:46,500 For I have seen the light! 289 00:20:55,900 --> 00:20:57,200 I come... 290 00:20:58,400 --> 00:20:59,900 in peace. 291 00:21:16,500 --> 00:21:19,800 Leave my elevator alone. 292 00:21:40,100 --> 00:21:43,100 What happened to my backyard? 293 00:21:56,700 --> 00:21:58,100 Got a light, honey? 294 00:21:59,100 --> 00:22:01,000 A light? Yes. 295 00:22:01,000 --> 00:22:02,500 I do have a light. 296 00:22:05,300 --> 00:22:06,700 Good. Thank you. 297 00:22:08,000 --> 00:22:10,900 So...you survived the blast. 298 00:22:10,900 --> 00:22:12,600 The blast? 299 00:22:12,600 --> 00:22:14,800 Honey, I've survived a host of things. 300 00:22:14,900 --> 00:22:17,400 Like the song says, the country boy can survive. 301 00:22:17,400 --> 00:22:19,300 Did you say you were a country boy? 302 00:22:19,300 --> 00:22:21,000 Cute little old man... 303 00:22:21,100 --> 00:22:23,200 if you want a boy, I can be a boy... 304 00:22:23,200 --> 00:22:25,000 and if you want a girl, I can be a girl. 305 00:22:25,000 --> 00:22:26,400 Hell, I can be whatever you want me to be. 306 00:22:26,400 --> 00:22:27,500 Really? 307 00:22:27,500 --> 00:22:28,900 Uh-huh, and it's all yours... 308 00:22:29,000 --> 00:22:31,000 for the remarkably low price of two hundred dollars. 309 00:22:31,000 --> 00:22:32,400 And if you act now... 310 00:22:32,500 --> 00:22:36,300 I may even throw in some free lawn furniture. 311 00:22:36,300 --> 00:22:38,500 No. Thanks. 312 00:22:38,500 --> 00:22:40,600 Thank you. I have to go. 313 00:22:40,600 --> 00:22:41,700 Go on. 314 00:22:44,200 --> 00:22:46,200 Get out of here, you old drunk! 315 00:22:52,500 --> 00:22:53,500 Surprise! 316 00:23:05,700 --> 00:23:07,400 I'm gonna give it to you straight. 317 00:23:07,500 --> 00:23:09,500 There's no point beating around the bush. 318 00:23:09,500 --> 00:23:10,700 There were survivors. 319 00:23:11,300 --> 00:23:16,000 Apparently the fallout has created a subspecies--mutants. 320 00:23:19,000 --> 00:23:20,100 -Mutants? -Not a pretty sight. 321 00:23:20,100 --> 00:23:22,100 Some eat out of garbage cans. 322 00:23:22,100 --> 00:23:25,000 Others--cover your ears, son, and hum. 323 00:23:25,100 --> 00:23:27,600 I mean that literally. Right now. 324 00:23:29,300 --> 00:23:32,900 Others...are multi-sexual. 325 00:23:32,900 --> 00:23:35,100 It seems they can be both... 326 00:23:35,200 --> 00:23:37,900 masculine and feminine simultaneously. 327 00:23:38,900 --> 00:23:40,600 -I don't believe it! -Believe it. 328 00:23:40,700 --> 00:23:42,700 He tried to sell me his body, Helen. 329 00:23:43,700 --> 00:23:45,700 They offer lawn furniture as a come-on. 330 00:23:49,600 --> 00:23:50,800 All right. 331 00:23:50,900 --> 00:23:52,500 They have done a lot of rebuilding... 332 00:23:52,500 --> 00:23:55,100 though society, at least as we know it... 333 00:23:55,100 --> 00:23:57,800 has totally collapsed. People throw up in the streets. 334 00:23:57,900 --> 00:23:59,100 Others point guns. 335 00:23:59,200 --> 00:24:01,700 There's something terribly wrong with the automobiles... 336 00:24:01,800 --> 00:24:03,700 and I can't tell you the rest. 337 00:24:03,700 --> 00:24:05,400 I just can't. Maybe someday. 338 00:24:06,800 --> 00:24:09,000 -What do we do now? -We stay down here! 339 00:24:09,000 --> 00:24:10,500 -We do? -Yes! 340 00:24:10,500 --> 00:24:11,600 We'll make do. 341 00:24:11,700 --> 00:24:13,700 We have clothes, running water from a well. 342 00:24:13,700 --> 00:24:16,000 I am convinced these mutants will kill each other off-- 343 00:24:16,100 --> 00:24:18,500 No, Calvin, we won't make do! 344 00:24:18,500 --> 00:24:21,400 Not me, not Adam ! We're going up! 345 00:24:21,400 --> 00:24:23,700 I don't care how horrible it is! We deserve it! 346 00:24:23,700 --> 00:24:25,000 I am the head of this household! 347 00:24:25,100 --> 00:24:27,100 I want him to see the sky! 348 00:24:27,100 --> 00:24:28,200 We will! 349 00:24:28,200 --> 00:24:29,900 The ocean! A mountain! 350 00:24:29,900 --> 00:24:31,300 Do as I say! 351 00:24:42,200 --> 00:24:43,900 Oh, Adam ! Oh, my goodness! 352 00:24:44,000 --> 00:24:45,100 Let's get him to the bedroom ! 353 00:24:46,500 --> 00:24:48,600 He seems to be doing all right now. 354 00:24:49,500 --> 00:24:51,100 I don't know if he had a heart attack... 355 00:24:51,200 --> 00:24:53,500 or just a horrifying experience... 356 00:24:53,600 --> 00:24:57,100 but we need supplies, and I've got to stay with him. 357 00:24:57,100 --> 00:24:58,200 I'll go up. 358 00:24:59,100 --> 00:25:00,600 I'm afraid you must. 359 00:25:00,600 --> 00:25:02,200 I'll be all right. 360 00:25:02,300 --> 00:25:04,300 My brave boy. 361 00:25:06,600 --> 00:25:08,200 Just act normal. 362 00:25:08,300 --> 00:25:10,600 If anyone asks, simply say... 363 00:25:10,700 --> 00:25:13,400 "I'm from out of town. I'm here on business." 364 00:25:13,500 --> 00:25:14,600 Write that down. 365 00:25:15,800 --> 00:25:18,100 Now, I'm going to give you a shopping list and some money. 366 00:25:18,200 --> 00:25:20,600 We'll need just enough to get through the next year or two. 367 00:25:20,700 --> 00:25:22,100 You'll find most of these items... 368 00:25:22,100 --> 00:25:24,500 at what used to be called a grocery store... 369 00:25:24,500 --> 00:25:26,700 or a hardware store. Write that down. 370 00:25:26,800 --> 00:25:29,300 I don't know how far you'll have to travel to find supplies... 371 00:25:29,300 --> 00:25:31,100 but if you can't get home by nightfall... 372 00:25:31,100 --> 00:25:33,700 I want you to look for something called a Holiday lnn. 373 00:25:33,800 --> 00:25:35,500 It's a hotel. Write that down. 374 00:25:35,500 --> 00:25:37,500 There might still be one left standing. 375 00:25:40,300 --> 00:25:41,900 Well, let's get you packed. 376 00:25:41,900 --> 00:25:43,500 Right. 377 00:25:43,500 --> 00:25:45,700 Just hope this is still good up there. 378 00:25:45,700 --> 00:25:47,400 -Say, Mom? -Yes, dear? 379 00:25:47,500 --> 00:25:49,200 I was wondering... 380 00:25:49,300 --> 00:25:51,000 while I was up there and all... 381 00:25:51,000 --> 00:25:53,400 I was thinking, well, you know... 382 00:25:53,400 --> 00:25:55,000 I was wondering if maybe I could... 383 00:25:56,300 --> 00:25:57,400 meet a girl. 384 00:25:58,400 --> 00:26:00,700 I've been thinking about that a little. 385 00:26:00,700 --> 00:26:02,500 Just these last fifteen years or so. 386 00:26:02,500 --> 00:26:06,200 Adam, it would be wonderful if you could meet a girl... 387 00:26:06,200 --> 00:26:07,800 one who's not a mutant... 388 00:26:07,900 --> 00:26:09,500 and hopefully comes from Pasadena. 389 00:26:09,500 --> 00:26:12,300 Nothing against valley girls, but in my day anyhow... 390 00:26:12,300 --> 00:26:16,000 girls from Pasadena always seemed a little bit nicer. 391 00:26:16,100 --> 00:26:19,800 Oh, and, son, there's also something called a liquor store. 392 00:26:19,800 --> 00:26:20,900 Write that down. 393 00:26:22,200 --> 00:26:23,300 "Liquor store." 394 00:26:54,500 --> 00:26:55,900 Are you all right? 395 00:26:58,000 --> 00:26:59,600 O Lord, yes. 396 00:26:59,700 --> 00:27:01,500 Are you the one who came last night... 397 00:27:01,500 --> 00:27:03,200 all in yellow? 398 00:27:05,300 --> 00:27:07,200 Oh, that was my father. 399 00:27:07,200 --> 00:27:09,900 Oh! Of course. The father. 400 00:27:10,900 --> 00:27:12,300 Forgive me. 401 00:27:12,300 --> 00:27:15,100 Can you forgive me for my wasted life? 402 00:27:15,200 --> 00:27:17,100 Everything has been so awful. 403 00:27:17,200 --> 00:27:20,100 I know. It has been terrible... 404 00:27:20,100 --> 00:27:22,600 but it's not your fault. 405 00:27:22,600 --> 00:27:24,100 And now that all the decay is over with... 406 00:27:24,200 --> 00:27:25,800 things are going to get better. 407 00:27:25,800 --> 00:27:27,200 -You understand? -Yes! 408 00:27:32,100 --> 00:27:33,400 Well, I have to go now. 409 00:27:33,500 --> 00:27:35,400 Of course! Of course you do. 410 00:27:35,500 --> 00:27:37,100 I'll stay here and pray. 411 00:27:37,100 --> 00:27:39,100 Say, that's always a good idea. 412 00:27:41,000 --> 00:27:42,500 How do I leave this place? 413 00:27:43,400 --> 00:27:44,800 The front door is open. 414 00:27:46,100 --> 00:27:48,000 Will you be back? 415 00:27:48,900 --> 00:27:50,100 I promise. 416 00:28:26,400 --> 00:28:27,900 What? 417 00:28:27,900 --> 00:28:29,100 What is it? 418 00:28:29,900 --> 00:28:31,000 The sky. 419 00:28:31,900 --> 00:28:33,700 The sky? Where? 420 00:28:33,700 --> 00:28:34,900 Up there. 421 00:28:35,900 --> 00:28:37,100 I don't see anything. 422 00:28:37,100 --> 00:28:38,200 Just look! 423 00:28:38,300 --> 00:28:39,500 What is it? 424 00:28:40,500 --> 00:28:42,500 He says he sees something. 425 00:28:46,700 --> 00:28:48,100 -What is it? -The Sky! 426 00:28:48,200 --> 00:28:49,600 I see it, Mommy! 427 00:28:49,600 --> 00:28:52,900 I have never in my life seen anything like it before. 428 00:28:53,800 --> 00:28:54,900 Or like you. 429 00:29:02,400 --> 00:29:03,500 What are you lookin' at? 430 00:29:03,500 --> 00:29:06,800 Oh, my lucky stars, a Negro. 431 00:29:06,900 --> 00:29:07,900 Say what? 432 00:29:08,000 --> 00:29:09,300 How do you do, ma'am? 433 00:29:09,400 --> 00:29:10,900 I do all right. 434 00:29:12,100 --> 00:29:13,200 Good. 435 00:29:17,000 --> 00:29:18,300 Wow! 436 00:29:19,400 --> 00:29:21,500 So this is public transportation. 437 00:29:21,500 --> 00:29:23,400 My father says it becomes more and more important... 438 00:29:23,500 --> 00:29:25,700 because of pollution, which is more and more... 439 00:29:25,700 --> 00:29:27,800 carbon dioxide and other hazardous gases in the air. 440 00:29:30,200 --> 00:29:31,900 Do you have a gun, by the way? 441 00:29:34,900 --> 00:29:37,900 Oh. Well, thank you for not waving it around. 442 00:29:37,900 --> 00:29:39,600 And for not vomiting, for that matter. 443 00:29:40,800 --> 00:29:43,100 Say, do you know where I could find a grocery store? 444 00:29:44,400 --> 00:29:46,700 I have to find that. That and a hardware store... 445 00:29:46,800 --> 00:29:48,900 a liquor store, and a standing Holiday lnn. 446 00:29:48,900 --> 00:29:52,500 There's a grocery store up the street. 447 00:29:52,600 --> 00:29:53,700 -Where? -Up there! 448 00:29:53,700 --> 00:29:56,300 Oh. Thank you. Driver, please stop the bus immediately! 449 00:29:56,300 --> 00:29:57,500 I wish to get off! 450 00:29:58,100 --> 00:29:59,800 Please stop the bus, sir! 451 00:30:04,300 --> 00:30:06,900 -Paper or plastic? -Paper, please. 452 00:30:07,000 --> 00:30:08,100 Do you have a club card? 453 00:30:11,300 --> 00:30:13,100 I need a price check on register four... 454 00:30:13,100 --> 00:30:15,300 Diet Dr. Pepper, six-pack. 455 00:30:23,400 --> 00:30:24,700 Don't talk to strangers. 456 00:30:28,200 --> 00:30:29,300 Can I help you? 457 00:30:29,400 --> 00:30:32,700 Oh, yes. I'd like to get some all-beef patties. 458 00:30:32,700 --> 00:30:33,900 Fresh or frozen? 459 00:30:34,700 --> 00:30:36,900 Come on. Frozen. 460 00:30:36,900 --> 00:30:38,100 How much are they? 461 00:30:39,100 --> 00:30:41,900 Frozen? Six-thirty a dozen in a three-pound box. 462 00:30:41,900 --> 00:30:44,000 Twelve into nine hundred is seventy-five. 463 00:30:44,000 --> 00:30:46,700 That's almost five hundred dollars just for the hamburger. 464 00:30:47,700 --> 00:30:50,100 My mother only gave me three thousand dollars for everything. 465 00:30:50,200 --> 00:30:52,100 The yacht batteries, the pipe tobacco... 466 00:30:52,100 --> 00:30:54,000 the diesel oil, the bleach... 467 00:30:54,000 --> 00:30:55,400 the floss, the birthday candles-- 468 00:30:55,500 --> 00:30:57,800 You could get a meat order that big delivered to your home. 469 00:30:57,900 --> 00:30:59,100 Really? 470 00:30:59,200 --> 00:31:00,400 Sure. 471 00:31:00,500 --> 00:31:02,400 Oh, that's terrific. 472 00:31:04,100 --> 00:31:07,100 Except it just occurred to me that I don't know where home is. 473 00:31:08,700 --> 00:31:10,500 I'm lost. 474 00:31:10,500 --> 00:31:11,600 -Do you know where I live? -No. 475 00:31:12,700 --> 00:31:13,900 Will you please excuse me? 476 00:31:13,900 --> 00:31:15,200 Gladly. 477 00:31:16,000 --> 00:31:17,100 Thank you. 478 00:31:40,800 --> 00:31:42,900 Driver, please stop the bus! 479 00:32:13,700 --> 00:32:15,100 The name's Adam Webber... 480 00:32:15,100 --> 00:32:17,500 and I see that you buy baseball cards. 481 00:32:17,500 --> 00:32:19,400 Although these are a lot older than the ones in the window... 482 00:32:19,400 --> 00:32:21,400 I was hoping that you still might be interested. 483 00:32:24,200 --> 00:32:26,200 How much you want for this Mickey Mantle rookie season? 484 00:32:26,300 --> 00:32:29,200 Well, I was hoping to sell all of the cards. 485 00:32:29,300 --> 00:32:31,500 Really? No kidding? 486 00:32:31,500 --> 00:32:33,000 All I have are hundred-dollar bills... 487 00:32:33,100 --> 00:32:34,500 and I need something smaller. 488 00:32:34,500 --> 00:32:36,100 Ones, tens, fives. 489 00:32:36,100 --> 00:32:38,500 I see what you mean. Tell you what. 490 00:32:38,500 --> 00:32:41,900 How about I give you five hundred in small bills... 491 00:32:41,900 --> 00:32:43,100 for the whole box? 492 00:32:44,600 --> 00:32:45,900 That would be wonderful. 493 00:32:45,900 --> 00:32:47,300 Aw, shit. 494 00:32:49,200 --> 00:32:51,800 I'm working here, Evie-poo. Don't screw me up. 495 00:32:51,800 --> 00:32:54,200 Yeah, I can see you're working, all right. 496 00:32:56,600 --> 00:32:57,700 Bon soir, mademoiselle. 497 00:32:57,700 --> 00:32:59,200 Oh, you're French? 498 00:33:01,100 --> 00:33:02,700 I'm from out of town. 499 00:33:02,800 --> 00:33:03,900 I'm here on business. 500 00:33:03,900 --> 00:33:06,000 Well, your business must not be sports memorabilia... 501 00:33:06,100 --> 00:33:08,000 because this one Mantle card right here-- 502 00:33:08,000 --> 00:33:11,400 worth six thousand dollars all by its itty-bitty self. 503 00:33:11,500 --> 00:33:12,900 Get out of here! 504 00:33:12,900 --> 00:33:14,400 No, you get out of here. 505 00:33:14,400 --> 00:33:17,100 Terrific. You're fired. 506 00:33:17,100 --> 00:33:19,700 -I quit. -No, no, no. I fired you. 507 00:33:19,700 --> 00:33:22,300 Just like the hair salon guy and the Chevy dealer. 508 00:33:22,300 --> 00:33:25,000 You know why you can't keep a goddamn job? 509 00:33:25,100 --> 00:33:27,700 'Cause you can't keep your goddamn mouth shut! 510 00:33:27,700 --> 00:33:30,100 Excuse me, sir, but I'd really appreciate it... 511 00:33:30,100 --> 00:33:32,400 if you wouldn't take the Lord's name in vain again. 512 00:33:32,400 --> 00:33:34,500 You got a problem with that, partner? 513 00:33:34,500 --> 00:33:37,900 Yes. I have a big problem with that. 514 00:33:38,800 --> 00:33:41,500 Come on, Heathcliff. I'll walk you out. 515 00:33:42,700 --> 00:33:44,800 Yes, ma'am, but my name's Adam. 516 00:33:46,200 --> 00:33:48,500 Adam and Eve, the perfect match. 517 00:33:48,600 --> 00:33:50,700 I hope the two of you will be very happy together. 518 00:33:50,700 --> 00:33:52,400 Mazel-fucking-tov. 519 00:33:52,400 --> 00:33:54,200 And don't come back, neither, miss big shot. 520 00:33:54,300 --> 00:33:55,400 I'm serious this time. 521 00:33:55,400 --> 00:33:56,900 You're finished in the hobby business. 522 00:33:57,000 --> 00:33:58,100 Where are we going? 523 00:33:58,200 --> 00:34:00,900 We? I'm going home. Judging by that coat... 524 00:34:00,900 --> 00:34:02,700 you have to get back to the barber college. 525 00:34:02,800 --> 00:34:04,300 No. I'm lost. 526 00:34:04,300 --> 00:34:06,400 You're lost? 527 00:34:06,400 --> 00:34:08,600 Did you just lose your job back there because of me? 528 00:34:09,500 --> 00:34:11,900 Forget it. I'm sick of working for that dickhead. 529 00:34:11,900 --> 00:34:13,000 Dickhead? 530 00:34:13,100 --> 00:34:16,000 A walking penis capable of intelligent speech. 531 00:34:16,100 --> 00:34:17,500 A dickhead. 532 00:34:18,300 --> 00:34:19,900 What is wrong with you? 533 00:34:20,000 --> 00:34:21,500 I just had this mental picture-- 534 00:34:21,600 --> 00:34:22,800 Help me pick these up. 535 00:34:23,900 --> 00:34:25,900 Oh, thank you. 536 00:34:27,200 --> 00:34:28,600 Where are you parked? 537 00:34:28,700 --> 00:34:30,300 I came on a bus. 538 00:34:30,400 --> 00:34:31,900 Why does that not surprise me? 539 00:34:32,000 --> 00:34:33,900 Don't know. Why doesn't it surprise you? 540 00:34:33,900 --> 00:34:36,600 Well, I guess because I'm a little psychic. 541 00:34:36,700 --> 00:34:37,900 I have this thing. 542 00:34:37,900 --> 00:34:39,700 I have this thing. 543 00:34:39,800 --> 00:34:41,200 Yeah. Let me guess. 544 00:34:41,200 --> 00:34:43,400 This is your first visit to la-la land. 545 00:34:43,500 --> 00:34:45,900 You're staying in Hollywood, because like an idiot... 546 00:34:46,000 --> 00:34:47,800 you thought that would be an exciting place to stay. 547 00:34:47,800 --> 00:34:49,700 -Am I right so far? -So far. 548 00:34:49,700 --> 00:34:51,700 -Yes, I'm right? -Right. 549 00:34:51,700 --> 00:34:52,900 I knew it. 550 00:34:52,900 --> 00:34:54,700 So you get on a bus and before you know it... 551 00:34:54,800 --> 00:34:56,900 So you get on a bus and before you know it... 552 00:34:56,900 --> 00:34:58,500 which brings us to here. Correct again? 553 00:34:58,500 --> 00:34:59,600 Again. 554 00:34:59,600 --> 00:35:01,500 Where are you staying? 555 00:35:02,600 --> 00:35:03,700 The Holiday lnn. 556 00:35:06,100 --> 00:35:07,400 That's exactly right. 557 00:35:07,500 --> 00:35:10,200 See? I'm psychic. Not completely, but pretty much. 558 00:35:10,300 --> 00:35:11,600 Pretty good, huh? 559 00:35:11,700 --> 00:35:14,400 No, it was amazing. 560 00:35:14,400 --> 00:35:17,700 I know. Thanks. I'm gonna predict a bus for you. 561 00:35:17,700 --> 00:35:19,800 -You go down here-- -Do you own a car? 562 00:35:19,800 --> 00:35:20,900 Oh, no, sweetie. 563 00:35:20,900 --> 00:35:22,700 Rule number one in North America. 564 00:35:22,700 --> 00:35:24,400 No strangers in the car. 565 00:35:24,500 --> 00:35:25,900 If it'll make you feel any better... 566 00:35:25,900 --> 00:35:27,300 I don't have a gun. 567 00:35:27,900 --> 00:35:30,300 Oh. Well, that changes everything. 568 00:35:30,300 --> 00:35:31,600 Get away from me! 569 00:35:32,900 --> 00:35:35,300 I said something wrong. Please forgive me. 570 00:35:35,400 --> 00:35:37,700 -Get away from me! -I'll make you a deal! 571 00:35:37,700 --> 00:35:40,700 I will give you a Rogers Hornsby if you take me to the hotel! 572 00:35:43,200 --> 00:35:44,500 Rogers Hornsby? 573 00:35:45,100 --> 00:35:47,200 He's yours. I was holding him back. 574 00:35:47,200 --> 00:35:50,000 Rogers Hornsby's worth four thousand dollars. 575 00:35:50,100 --> 00:35:51,700 So what? I got two of them ! 576 00:35:51,800 --> 00:35:54,800 And this many Larry "Yogi" Berras... 577 00:35:54,900 --> 00:35:56,600 and... 578 00:35:56,600 --> 00:35:58,900 For four thousand dollars, all I have to do... 579 00:35:58,900 --> 00:36:00,100 is drive you to your hotel? 580 00:36:00,100 --> 00:36:01,700 -Uh-huh. -That's it? 581 00:36:01,700 --> 00:36:03,800 I don't have to take a physical on your spaceship? 582 00:36:03,900 --> 00:36:04,900 No, ma'am. 583 00:36:05,000 --> 00:36:06,600 What? 584 00:36:13,700 --> 00:36:16,100 So, Mr. Andretti, first time on the freeway? 585 00:36:16,200 --> 00:36:18,500 It's Webber. Adam Webber. 586 00:36:18,500 --> 00:36:21,300 Mind if I change the station? Better traffic reports on A.M. 587 00:36:21,300 --> 00:36:23,500 Sure. Wait! 588 00:36:23,500 --> 00:36:25,300 What? What is it? 589 00:36:25,400 --> 00:36:27,200 Go back. You had him. It's Perry. 590 00:36:29,100 --> 00:36:30,500 Perry Como. 591 00:36:30,500 --> 00:36:32,500 You had him. Go back. 592 00:36:34,000 --> 00:36:35,100 OK. Just-- 593 00:36:36,100 --> 00:36:38,000 -That's it. -There. 594 00:36:41,700 --> 00:36:44,900 I could die right now. 595 00:36:44,900 --> 00:36:46,200 Over this? 596 00:36:51,900 --> 00:36:53,100 Listen to this part. 597 00:36:54,000 --> 00:36:55,600 This is where it really takes off. 598 00:36:55,700 --> 00:36:57,600 Wait for it. There! 599 00:37:00,400 --> 00:37:03,300 You are one scary son of a gun. 600 00:37:16,800 --> 00:37:18,200 You better slow down. 601 00:37:18,200 --> 00:37:21,100 I can't help it. Perry Como always does this to me. 602 00:37:21,200 --> 00:37:23,500 I just get so cranked. 603 00:37:35,500 --> 00:37:37,000 Card, please. End of service. 604 00:37:37,700 --> 00:37:39,400 That was wonderful. 605 00:37:39,400 --> 00:37:41,900 I've never felt anything like that before in my life. 606 00:37:41,900 --> 00:37:43,700 Yeah, same here. Don't forget your suitcase. 607 00:37:46,000 --> 00:37:47,400 Thanks. You know-- 608 00:37:55,100 --> 00:37:56,500 I would like to stay at this hotel. 609 00:37:56,500 --> 00:37:59,300 Fill this out, please, and I'll need to see a card. 610 00:38:00,600 --> 00:38:01,700 A card? 611 00:38:01,800 --> 00:38:03,300 Yes, sir. 612 00:38:03,300 --> 00:38:06,100 Oh. Of course. 613 00:38:13,300 --> 00:38:14,700 OK, then. 614 00:38:16,100 --> 00:38:17,900 Bathroom's there... 615 00:38:17,900 --> 00:38:19,800 TV's there--remote is on top. 616 00:38:19,900 --> 00:38:21,700 Room service menu on the table. 617 00:38:23,200 --> 00:38:25,000 Wow. 618 00:38:35,500 --> 00:38:37,100 Oh, you dial nine to get out. 619 00:38:38,900 --> 00:38:40,000 Of what? 620 00:38:41,600 --> 00:38:43,000 The hotel. 621 00:38:44,700 --> 00:38:45,800 I see. 622 00:38:48,500 --> 00:38:50,900 Thank you. You've been very, very helpful. 623 00:38:51,000 --> 00:38:53,200 I managed to get some change downstairs... 624 00:38:53,200 --> 00:38:55,700 and my father taught me in situations like this... 625 00:38:55,700 --> 00:38:57,400 it's customary to give a tip. 626 00:38:58,300 --> 00:39:00,700 Your father's a smart guy. 627 00:39:00,800 --> 00:39:02,100 My father's a genius. 628 00:39:05,900 --> 00:39:09,400 All right, here's your key, and good night, sir. 629 00:39:09,400 --> 00:39:11,100 Good night. Sleep tight. 630 00:39:11,100 --> 00:39:14,100 Don't let the bedbugs bite. That's what my mom always says. 631 00:39:14,100 --> 00:39:15,900 Who I'm really beginning to miss, by the way. 632 00:39:17,200 --> 00:39:20,100 Sorry. It's my first night away from home. 633 00:39:21,400 --> 00:39:22,500 How old are you? 634 00:39:22,500 --> 00:39:24,300 Thirty-five. 635 00:39:25,700 --> 00:39:27,200 You don't look thirty-five. 636 00:39:27,200 --> 00:39:28,700 How old do I look? 637 00:39:28,800 --> 00:39:31,300 Oh, twenty-five, around there. 638 00:39:33,100 --> 00:39:34,900 I guess living up here makes people look older. 639 00:39:36,500 --> 00:39:38,400 Up here on the eighteenth floor? 640 00:39:39,300 --> 00:39:41,400 Yes, up here on the eighteenth floor. 641 00:39:41,400 --> 00:39:42,700 Good night. 642 00:39:57,600 --> 00:39:59,300 What the hell am I doing here? 643 00:39:59,400 --> 00:40:01,800 That's what I'd like to know. Somebody tell me that. 644 00:40:03,200 --> 00:40:05,700 Natural oils, tropical fruits... 645 00:40:05,700 --> 00:40:09,500 flora, nuts, and protective sunscreens... 646 00:40:09,600 --> 00:40:12,100 a complete sun-care line... 647 00:40:20,300 --> 00:40:22,900 Hi. This is the woman from the baseball card store. 648 00:40:23,000 --> 00:40:24,100 -Remember me? -Oh, yes.Hi. 649 00:40:27,000 --> 00:40:28,600 Hot-diggety-dog! 650 00:40:28,600 --> 00:40:31,100 Thanks for calling me on the telephone. 651 00:40:38,400 --> 00:40:40,000 I'm so glad to see you. 652 00:40:40,000 --> 00:40:41,100 I thought I'd never see you again. 653 00:40:41,100 --> 00:40:42,900 OK, down, boy. 654 00:40:43,000 --> 00:40:45,900 Listen, I can't take this for driving you home. 655 00:40:46,000 --> 00:40:48,900 I wish I could, but I can't, so, here, take it back. 656 00:40:50,000 --> 00:40:51,500 I would have left it at the front desk... 657 00:40:51,500 --> 00:40:52,700 but it's very valuable. Take it. 658 00:40:52,800 --> 00:40:54,200 I can't take that. It's yours. 659 00:40:54,300 --> 00:40:55,700 Take it, damn it! 660 00:40:56,700 --> 00:40:58,600 Why are you doing that? 661 00:40:58,700 --> 00:41:00,200 Because I haven't brushed yet. 662 00:41:02,700 --> 00:41:05,400 Well, so long. Enjoy your visit. 663 00:41:05,400 --> 00:41:07,100 Wait. Eve, please wait. 664 00:41:07,100 --> 00:41:09,800 Please, do not follow me. Don't do it. 665 00:41:09,800 --> 00:41:12,600 I knew this would happen. You're like a lost puppy. 666 00:41:12,600 --> 00:41:15,600 Can't you talk to me for just one little second? 667 00:41:17,400 --> 00:41:19,700 Damn, I should have taken the money and run. 668 00:41:19,700 --> 00:41:22,300 That's what Troy told me to do, but did I listen? No. 669 00:41:23,100 --> 00:41:25,900 Will you put your hand down? 670 00:41:25,900 --> 00:41:28,600 Who's Troy? Is he your husband? 671 00:41:28,600 --> 00:41:30,500 Or a boyfriend? 672 00:41:31,000 --> 00:41:32,900 Thank you! 673 00:41:32,900 --> 00:41:35,400 Stop that! Don't do that! 674 00:41:35,500 --> 00:41:39,200 Listen, I know you like me, OK? I can tell. 675 00:41:39,200 --> 00:41:42,300 But, you know what? A lot of guys like me. 676 00:41:42,300 --> 00:41:45,100 Not me exactly. It's my legs or my butt or my hair... 677 00:41:45,100 --> 00:41:46,300 or some combination of the above. 678 00:41:46,400 --> 00:41:48,300 I think it's the eyes. 679 00:41:48,400 --> 00:41:50,600 The eyes? 680 00:41:50,600 --> 00:41:53,900 Great. An eye man. Anyhow, it never works out. 681 00:41:53,900 --> 00:41:56,100 OK? Not that you even need to know that. 682 00:41:56,200 --> 00:41:58,600 You look like crap. What have you been doing? 683 00:41:58,700 --> 00:42:01,300 Watching television. In color. 684 00:42:02,900 --> 00:42:04,500 In color? No kidding. 685 00:42:04,500 --> 00:42:06,900 Cross my heart and hope to die. 686 00:42:06,900 --> 00:42:08,600 Yeah. See ya. 687 00:42:09,300 --> 00:42:10,700 Why doesn't it ever work out? 688 00:42:10,700 --> 00:42:11,800 What? 689 00:42:11,800 --> 00:42:13,500 Why doesn't it ever work out, you and men? 690 00:42:13,600 --> 00:42:15,600 Why? Who the hell knows? 691 00:42:16,500 --> 00:42:18,900 If you promise to leave me alone, I'll tell you why. 692 00:42:19,800 --> 00:42:20,900 It never works out... 693 00:42:20,900 --> 00:42:24,700 because I am into legs and hair and butts myself. 694 00:42:24,700 --> 00:42:26,500 So I wind up with guys who are very good-looking... 695 00:42:26,500 --> 00:42:29,200 but even more shallow than I am, if you can picture that. 696 00:42:29,300 --> 00:42:30,700 If you'll excuse me, I have to go find... 697 00:42:30,700 --> 00:42:32,100 another low-paying, demeaning job... 698 00:42:32,100 --> 00:42:34,100 where some guy named Jerry keeps telling me... 699 00:42:34,100 --> 00:42:35,700 how lousy his marriage is. 700 00:42:35,800 --> 00:42:37,900 -Why not go to work for me? -Doing what? 701 00:42:37,900 --> 00:42:39,500 Helping me sell all my baseball cards... 702 00:42:39,500 --> 00:42:40,600 and buying enough food and supplies... 703 00:42:40,700 --> 00:42:42,800 to fill several large trucks. 704 00:42:42,800 --> 00:42:44,200 Food and supplies? 705 00:42:44,300 --> 00:42:45,700 Who for, starving people? 706 00:42:45,700 --> 00:42:49,100 They're not starving yet, but they do need help. 707 00:42:49,100 --> 00:42:50,800 How long would you need me for? 708 00:42:50,800 --> 00:42:52,300 Two weeks. 709 00:42:52,300 --> 00:42:53,400 What's the pay? 710 00:42:53,500 --> 00:42:54,800 What's fair? 711 00:42:54,900 --> 00:42:58,100 I gotta make at least a thousand dollars a week. 712 00:43:03,000 --> 00:43:04,100 You got it. 713 00:43:04,800 --> 00:43:06,900 -Wait here while I get changed. -Sure. 714 00:43:17,700 --> 00:43:19,200 Here you go. 715 00:43:19,300 --> 00:43:20,700 Why would someone need... 716 00:43:20,800 --> 00:43:24,100 twenty-six yacht batteries? 717 00:43:24,200 --> 00:43:26,600 I don't know. I just work for the guy. 718 00:43:26,700 --> 00:43:28,900 And who does he work for, the CIA? 719 00:43:28,900 --> 00:43:30,500 Pipe tobacco. 720 00:43:32,000 --> 00:43:33,400 I'm going to need all of this. 721 00:43:36,000 --> 00:43:37,800 Toilet paper. 722 00:43:39,800 --> 00:43:40,900 Is there a sale? 723 00:43:56,600 --> 00:43:58,700 Well, another day, another dollar. 724 00:44:05,700 --> 00:44:07,000 Will you stop staring at me? 725 00:44:07,000 --> 00:44:08,100 Sorry. 726 00:44:09,100 --> 00:44:10,400 I'll pick you up at 8:00 in the morning. 727 00:44:14,400 --> 00:44:15,600 You know, Eve, I was thinking-- 728 00:44:15,600 --> 00:44:16,700 -Good night. -Good night. 729 00:44:36,300 --> 00:44:38,100 We'll need to rent a refrigerated truck... 730 00:44:38,100 --> 00:44:40,100 for the beef and poultry. 731 00:44:40,100 --> 00:44:41,900 Well, it's your life. 732 00:44:41,900 --> 00:44:44,100 And by the way, it's a dandy. 733 00:44:46,500 --> 00:44:48,800 Think we're also going to have to get another locker. 734 00:44:49,500 --> 00:44:51,800 It's no problem. We'll just sell another baseball card. 735 00:44:53,300 --> 00:44:54,600 Coming down. 736 00:45:04,300 --> 00:45:05,400 You know, Eve... 737 00:45:06,400 --> 00:45:08,200 And--and don't get mad, OK, but... 738 00:45:09,600 --> 00:45:12,300 I would just be lost without you. 739 00:45:15,500 --> 00:45:16,700 Thanks. 740 00:45:18,700 --> 00:45:20,100 And I guess... 741 00:45:21,100 --> 00:45:22,400 I guess that... 742 00:45:22,500 --> 00:45:23,500 I think that you and l-- 743 00:45:23,600 --> 00:45:25,600 Adam, don't even think about it, OK? 744 00:45:25,600 --> 00:45:27,800 I'm sorry. I know that sounds mean... 745 00:45:27,900 --> 00:45:30,300 but it would be a lot meaner if I didn't say it, OK? 746 00:45:32,700 --> 00:45:34,900 Let's take this truck back, and I'm hungry. 747 00:45:38,600 --> 00:45:39,700 Are you getting in? 748 00:45:45,100 --> 00:45:46,600 There's something else I'd like you to help me with. 749 00:45:46,700 --> 00:45:47,800 Name it. 750 00:45:47,800 --> 00:45:50,400 I'm afraid this is going to sound a little bit crazy. 751 00:45:50,400 --> 00:45:52,400 I'm sure it will. 752 00:45:52,400 --> 00:45:53,500 Then forget it. 753 00:45:53,500 --> 00:45:56,100 No, no. I'm sorry. 754 00:45:56,200 --> 00:45:57,300 What is it? 755 00:45:58,700 --> 00:46:00,400 Eve, I want you to help me find... 756 00:46:01,100 --> 00:46:02,200 a wife. 757 00:46:02,300 --> 00:46:04,700 -A wife? -Yes. 758 00:46:04,700 --> 00:46:05,800 What for? 759 00:46:05,900 --> 00:46:07,900 Because I want to get married. 760 00:46:08,000 --> 00:46:09,500 Why? 761 00:46:09,500 --> 00:46:11,100 Because I don't want to be alone. 762 00:46:11,100 --> 00:46:13,100 Well, you can be single and not alone. 763 00:46:13,100 --> 00:46:15,500 Marriage bites. 764 00:46:15,500 --> 00:46:17,700 -Bites what? -The big one. 765 00:46:17,700 --> 00:46:19,000 It does? 766 00:46:19,000 --> 00:46:20,100 Sure. 767 00:46:20,100 --> 00:46:21,200 Oh. I didn't know that. 768 00:46:21,300 --> 00:46:22,900 Everybody knows that. 769 00:46:23,000 --> 00:46:25,500 I mean, ask my divorced brothers... 770 00:46:25,500 --> 00:46:27,500 or my divorced mom and dad. 771 00:46:27,500 --> 00:46:29,500 Everybody knows that. 772 00:46:29,500 --> 00:46:30,700 They're all divorced? 773 00:46:30,800 --> 00:46:32,800 Everybody's divorced. 774 00:46:37,500 --> 00:46:39,100 What kind of wife you looking for? 775 00:46:39,200 --> 00:46:40,900 Oh, um, well... 776 00:46:42,000 --> 00:46:43,300 one who's not a mutant. 777 00:46:44,300 --> 00:46:45,400 No dogs, huh? 778 00:46:45,500 --> 00:46:47,100 OK. Cool. 779 00:46:48,400 --> 00:46:49,700 And if it's possible... 780 00:46:49,800 --> 00:46:52,100 I'd like to marry someone from Pasadena. 781 00:46:57,400 --> 00:46:59,700 Um, when do you need her by? 782 00:47:01,500 --> 00:47:02,600 Two weeks? 783 00:47:03,500 --> 00:47:05,300 Well, I can probably get you laid in two weeks... 784 00:47:05,300 --> 00:47:09,100 but to locate a non-mutant wife from Pasadena... 785 00:47:09,100 --> 00:47:10,300 will take some time. 786 00:47:11,800 --> 00:47:13,200 That's what I was afraid of. 787 00:47:19,000 --> 00:47:21,300 What do you mean, you can get me laid? 788 00:47:23,700 --> 00:47:25,200 Uh, can we talk about that a little later? 789 00:47:25,200 --> 00:47:26,800 -Of course. -Great. 790 00:47:29,500 --> 00:47:31,900 Lord, bless this food we are about to receive... 791 00:47:32,000 --> 00:47:34,800 and make us ever mindful of the needs of others. 792 00:47:34,800 --> 00:47:36,100 And bless my mom... 793 00:47:36,200 --> 00:47:37,300 and bless my dad... 794 00:47:37,300 --> 00:47:39,400 and bless my new friend Eve. 795 00:47:39,500 --> 00:47:40,600 -Amen. -Amen. 796 00:47:50,900 --> 00:47:51,900 Get out. 797 00:47:51,900 --> 00:47:54,200 -The engine is still running. -Now! Get out! 798 00:47:54,200 --> 00:47:55,300 Yes, ma'am. 799 00:47:55,300 --> 00:47:56,800 -Stop the "Ma'am" crap. -Sorry. 800 00:47:58,400 --> 00:47:59,800 You almost got us killed. 801 00:47:59,900 --> 00:48:01,600 I told you, I've never driven before. 802 00:48:01,700 --> 00:48:03,200 Well, never drive again. 803 00:48:03,200 --> 00:48:05,200 You said it would be easy. 804 00:48:05,300 --> 00:48:06,700 Well, I was wrong! 805 00:48:07,700 --> 00:48:09,500 -Say, is this your house? -Yes. 806 00:48:09,600 --> 00:48:10,700 I like it. 807 00:48:10,700 --> 00:48:12,600 What are you bitching about now? 808 00:48:13,200 --> 00:48:14,500 What are you doing here? 809 00:48:14,500 --> 00:48:16,100 I forgot some of my stuff. 810 00:48:16,100 --> 00:48:18,000 -Your stuff? -Yeah. 811 00:48:18,000 --> 00:48:19,300 Let me see that. 812 00:48:20,100 --> 00:48:22,100 Oh, you came back for your underwear. 813 00:48:22,200 --> 00:48:25,100 Excuse me. These are Ralph Laurens. 814 00:48:25,100 --> 00:48:26,300 How'd you get in? 815 00:48:27,700 --> 00:48:28,800 Thanks. 816 00:48:29,500 --> 00:48:31,900 And who's this interesting looking fellow? 817 00:48:31,500 --> 00:48:32,200 This is Adam. 818 00:48:32,200 --> 00:48:33,600 Adam, this is Cliff. 819 00:48:33,700 --> 00:48:35,300 How do you do? 820 00:48:35,300 --> 00:48:36,800 I do fine, Adam. 821 00:48:36,800 --> 00:48:39,000 How about yourself? You, uh... 822 00:48:39,100 --> 00:48:40,700 doing any good lately? 823 00:48:40,700 --> 00:48:43,000 Go home, Cliff, wherever that might be. 824 00:48:43,100 --> 00:48:44,600 Sheena Gilroy's apartment. 825 00:48:44,600 --> 00:48:48,000 You remember her. She's the model who went to Harvard. 826 00:48:50,300 --> 00:48:52,100 Well, I'd better be going. 827 00:48:52,200 --> 00:48:53,500 Bye, Adam. 828 00:48:53,500 --> 00:48:55,400 -Nice coat. -Thank you, Cliff. 829 00:48:55,500 --> 00:48:56,900 It was very nice to meet you. 830 00:48:56,900 --> 00:48:58,500 That's a nice parking job, too. 831 00:48:59,400 --> 00:49:00,800 May I ask you a question? 832 00:49:00,900 --> 00:49:01,900 He's a former boyfriend. 833 00:49:02,000 --> 00:49:03,300 We lived together for about six months... 834 00:49:03,400 --> 00:49:05,700 and, yes, I still have sort of a thing for him. 835 00:49:05,700 --> 00:49:07,900 That's what you wanted to know, isn't it? 836 00:49:07,900 --> 00:49:09,500 No. I was going to ask you... 837 00:49:09,500 --> 00:49:12,100 why Cliff likes to wear another man's underpants. 838 00:49:12,100 --> 00:49:13,200 What? 839 00:49:26,900 --> 00:49:29,200 This guy is unbelievable. 840 00:49:30,200 --> 00:49:31,300 I knew you'd like him. 841 00:49:31,300 --> 00:49:33,500 I know. It's like he's from "X Files" or something. 842 00:49:33,500 --> 00:49:36,600 He's got all these easily negotiable properties, right? 843 00:49:36,600 --> 00:49:37,900 And he's obviously setting up something big-- 844 00:49:37,900 --> 00:49:40,700 maybe a self-sustaining island off the coast of South America. 845 00:49:40,700 --> 00:49:41,800 Or maybe he's the leader of some cult... 846 00:49:41,800 --> 00:49:45,100 that's into practices involving poultry and pipe tobacco. 847 00:49:51,700 --> 00:49:53,500 You have very nice ceilings. 848 00:49:53,500 --> 00:49:55,100 -Do l? -Mm-hmm. 849 00:49:55,800 --> 00:49:56,900 Well... 850 00:49:57,900 --> 00:49:59,600 you like ceilings? 851 00:49:59,700 --> 00:50:00,800 Not particularly. 852 00:50:01,900 --> 00:50:03,300 Ah. Well, I hope you like this. 853 00:50:03,300 --> 00:50:06,000 It's fresh sea urchin wrapped in seaweed. 854 00:50:06,000 --> 00:50:07,100 I love sushi. 855 00:50:07,900 --> 00:50:09,100 I love Lucy. 856 00:50:09,100 --> 00:50:11,800 Who doesn't? She's hilarious. 857 00:50:12,500 --> 00:50:14,800 Here you go-- one champagne cocktail. 858 00:50:14,900 --> 00:50:15,900 Oh, thank you. 859 00:50:16,000 --> 00:50:18,100 I thought only hookers drank those things. 860 00:50:18,100 --> 00:50:20,400 Well, I know Mom sure likes them. 861 00:50:24,700 --> 00:50:27,100 Well, dinner's in fifteen. Why don't we sit down and chat? 862 00:50:28,700 --> 00:50:30,300 So, Troy, what do you do for a living? 863 00:50:30,300 --> 00:50:32,300 Oh, I design web sites. 864 00:50:34,800 --> 00:50:35,900 And, Adam... 865 00:50:36,800 --> 00:50:38,300 where on Earth are you from? 866 00:50:38,300 --> 00:50:39,700 Out of town. That's all he'll say. 867 00:50:39,800 --> 00:50:41,700 It's a very small place. 868 00:50:41,700 --> 00:50:43,300 People don't even know it's there. 869 00:50:44,100 --> 00:50:45,400 And it's called? 870 00:50:45,400 --> 00:50:47,700 Maybe Eve can guess. 871 00:50:47,700 --> 00:50:48,800 She's psychic. 872 00:50:48,900 --> 00:50:50,400 Is she? 873 00:50:50,400 --> 00:50:51,600 Since when? 874 00:50:51,600 --> 00:50:53,900 Since I got rear-ended in Palm Springs. 875 00:50:54,000 --> 00:50:55,300 Well, then, Miss Dionne Warwick... 876 00:50:55,300 --> 00:50:56,700 why don't you tell us what town he's from? 877 00:50:57,700 --> 00:50:59,800 All right. Give me your hand. 878 00:51:01,300 --> 00:51:02,600 Oh, Lord. 879 00:51:05,200 --> 00:51:06,500 I'm not promising anything. 880 00:51:09,000 --> 00:51:10,600 -Are you OK? -Mm-hmm. 881 00:51:14,700 --> 00:51:16,600 I see snow-- 882 00:51:17,900 --> 00:51:19,800 lots of snow... 883 00:51:19,800 --> 00:51:21,300 way up north. 884 00:51:22,000 --> 00:51:23,500 -Are we getting hot? -Yes... 885 00:51:27,900 --> 00:51:30,000 You live in Alaska... 886 00:51:30,100 --> 00:51:32,900 and the only way in and out of your place is by plane. 887 00:51:34,000 --> 00:51:36,900 And you definitely came here for food and supplies... 888 00:51:36,900 --> 00:51:38,300 and to find a wife. 889 00:51:41,500 --> 00:51:42,900 That was right? 890 00:51:42,900 --> 00:51:44,700 Got goosebumps all over me. 891 00:51:44,800 --> 00:51:46,500 I'm clairvoyant, butthead. 892 00:51:46,500 --> 00:51:48,900 Why wouldn't you just go to Nome... 893 00:51:49,000 --> 00:51:50,300 to get supplies and a wife? 894 00:51:50,300 --> 00:51:51,600 Isn't that a lot closer? 895 00:51:51,700 --> 00:51:54,600 Yeah, right. That's where you'd go to find girls-- 896 00:51:54,700 --> 00:51:56,100 Nome. 897 00:51:56,100 --> 00:51:57,700 He's gay, by the way. 898 00:51:58,900 --> 00:52:00,500 Well, good for you. 899 00:52:01,800 --> 00:52:03,700 Well, we try. 900 00:52:03,800 --> 00:52:05,200 Can I ask you some questions? 901 00:52:07,100 --> 00:52:09,000 When did Alaska become a state? 902 00:52:09,000 --> 00:52:10,100 1959. 903 00:52:10,100 --> 00:52:12,500 And who owned it before we did? 904 00:52:12,500 --> 00:52:13,900 Russia. 905 00:52:14,000 --> 00:52:15,400 And when did we get it from them? 906 00:52:15,400 --> 00:52:17,200 1867--Seward's folly. 907 00:52:17,200 --> 00:52:20,100 We purchased it for seven point two million dollars-- 908 00:52:20,100 --> 00:52:21,800 a tidy sum then as well as now. 909 00:52:21,900 --> 00:52:23,600 I'm quoting my father, of course. 910 00:52:23,700 --> 00:52:25,300 All right, what's the state capital? 911 00:52:25,400 --> 00:52:26,500 Juneau. 912 00:52:26,500 --> 00:52:28,800 Hello? It's Anchorage. Gotcha. 913 00:52:30,000 --> 00:52:31,900 Sorry. That's the largest city. 914 00:52:38,000 --> 00:52:39,100 Where's he going? 915 00:52:39,100 --> 00:52:41,700 He's going to check your answers on his computer. 916 00:52:42,800 --> 00:52:44,100 He has a computer? 917 00:52:44,100 --> 00:52:46,100 -Sure. -In the house? 918 00:52:46,100 --> 00:52:48,200 No, actually, it's in the backyard. 919 00:52:48,300 --> 00:52:49,900 Of course it's in the house. It's in there. 920 00:52:49,900 --> 00:52:51,000 -May I be excused, please? -Yeah. 921 00:52:52,800 --> 00:52:53,900 Thank you. 922 00:53:42,500 --> 00:53:43,700 Who are you? 923 00:53:45,700 --> 00:53:46,700 I'm the mother. 924 00:53:46,800 --> 00:53:48,300 It's the mother! 925 00:54:05,900 --> 00:54:07,600 Troy, I suppose those tall buildings... 926 00:54:07,700 --> 00:54:09,300 we saw this morning are new? 927 00:54:09,300 --> 00:54:11,700 Yeah. Almost all of them, anyway. 928 00:54:11,700 --> 00:54:13,200 The recovery's impressive. 929 00:54:13,300 --> 00:54:14,400 Recovery? 930 00:54:14,500 --> 00:54:18,000 Oh, yeah. They rebuilt the freeway in only six months. 931 00:54:18,000 --> 00:54:19,700 -Really? -Uh-huh. 932 00:54:19,800 --> 00:54:21,700 That's amazing. I'm very impressed. 933 00:54:21,700 --> 00:54:23,800 -Oh, well, that's impressive. -Are you sure I look OK? 934 00:54:23,800 --> 00:54:25,700 Oh, trust me, you look fabulous. 935 00:54:25,700 --> 00:54:26,800 Thank you, Troy. 936 00:54:32,800 --> 00:54:35,000 So, what do you think? 937 00:54:36,000 --> 00:54:37,100 It works. 938 00:54:37,100 --> 00:54:39,200 Maybe I should show you the entire trousseau-- 939 00:54:39,300 --> 00:54:41,100 shirts, sweaters, socks, the whole thing. 940 00:54:41,100 --> 00:54:42,600 No. First, let's show her these. 941 00:54:45,700 --> 00:54:47,000 Eve, can I skate around your block? 942 00:54:48,700 --> 00:54:50,300 How about it, Eve? 943 00:54:50,400 --> 00:54:52,300 -Can he skate around your block? -No. 944 00:54:54,200 --> 00:54:56,400 Just a few laps. 945 00:54:56,400 --> 00:54:57,500 It won't take long. 946 00:55:16,300 --> 00:55:17,400 Look. 947 00:55:27,900 --> 00:55:30,100 Adam, will you go skate on the bike path? 948 00:55:30,100 --> 00:55:32,400 -Where? -The bike path. It's over there. 949 00:55:35,400 --> 00:55:37,000 God, I wish I could wear those pants. 950 00:57:31,800 --> 00:57:33,600 All right, girl, hit that ball. 951 00:57:43,500 --> 00:57:45,100 I get it. 952 00:57:45,100 --> 00:57:47,100 I finally get it. 953 00:57:47,200 --> 00:57:49,800 You have to see it to understand it. 954 00:57:51,800 --> 00:57:53,300 Because he must. 955 00:58:03,900 --> 00:58:05,600 Haven't you ever heard the saying... 956 00:58:05,600 --> 00:58:07,900 "He hasn't got enough sense to come in out of the rain"? 957 00:58:09,400 --> 00:58:11,100 You know... 958 00:58:11,200 --> 00:58:14,300 my father, who is a scientist... 959 00:58:14,400 --> 00:58:16,800 says that everything is a miracle. 960 00:58:17,800 --> 00:58:19,000 Everything. 961 00:58:19,100 --> 00:58:22,100 Until recently, I wasn't sure what he meant by that. 962 00:58:22,200 --> 00:58:23,700 No kidding. Listen... 963 00:58:23,700 --> 00:58:25,500 you still want to go girl hunting tonight? 964 00:58:25,600 --> 00:58:26,900 Oh, yes, I certainly do. 965 00:58:29,300 --> 00:58:30,500 But, I mean, you know... 966 00:58:30,500 --> 00:58:31,900 this whole business of finding you a wife... 967 00:58:31,900 --> 00:58:33,400 it's pretty ridiculous, don't you think? 968 00:58:33,400 --> 00:58:35,400 -No, it isn't. -Yes, it is. 969 00:58:36,600 --> 00:58:38,700 A girlfriend, maybe, but a wife, it's... 970 00:58:38,800 --> 00:58:40,100 Well, then help me find a girlfriend. That's all I ask. 971 00:58:41,400 --> 00:58:43,600 I'll tell you what. I'll give you every single card I've got. 972 00:58:44,500 --> 00:58:47,100 Screw you. You think I'm just somebody you can buy off? 973 00:58:47,200 --> 00:58:48,500 I didn't mean that at all. 974 00:58:48,500 --> 00:58:50,500 Eve, you're my best friend. 975 00:58:50,500 --> 00:58:53,100 Would you do it because you're my very best friend? 976 00:59:02,300 --> 00:59:03,700 Thank you, Eve. 977 00:59:11,900 --> 00:59:13,600 Well, why did we park way back there? 978 00:59:15,300 --> 00:59:17,800 She doesn't allow total strangers to drive her car. 979 00:59:20,400 --> 00:59:22,600 -What? -Ladies first, Troy. 980 00:59:22,700 --> 00:59:24,400 -That was close. -Uh-huh. 981 00:59:25,200 --> 00:59:28,500 My goodness gracious, this place is something. 982 00:59:28,500 --> 00:59:29,700 Look unimpressed. 983 00:59:29,800 --> 00:59:31,200 Yeah, bored, even. 984 00:59:33,000 --> 00:59:35,400 Try vaguely bored. 985 00:59:35,500 --> 00:59:37,700 Unimpressed, but still interested. 986 00:59:39,800 --> 00:59:40,900 Not crazy. 987 00:59:40,900 --> 00:59:42,300 -Do I look crazy? -Yes. 988 00:59:42,400 --> 00:59:44,700 Just, uh, be loose. 989 00:59:46,100 --> 00:59:48,800 -Just be yourself. -That's always good advice. 990 00:59:48,800 --> 00:59:51,300 Well, for him. It doesn't work with the rest of us. 991 00:59:54,300 --> 00:59:57,800 Of all the clubs in all the towns in all the world... 992 00:59:57,900 --> 00:59:59,200 you walk into mine. 993 00:59:59,300 --> 01:00:01,000 So welcome to Club 40's... 994 01:00:01,000 --> 01:00:03,400 where the party never stops. 995 01:00:03,400 --> 01:00:04,600 Ah, Jason, Jonathan... 996 01:00:04,600 --> 01:00:06,200 this is Adam. Adam, that's them. 997 01:00:06,300 --> 01:00:07,600 Hi. How do you do? 998 01:00:07,600 --> 01:00:10,800 It's very nice to meet you, Jason and Jonathan. 999 01:00:10,800 --> 01:00:11,900 My mother always said... 1000 01:00:11,900 --> 01:00:13,600 that when you meet someone for the first time... 1001 01:00:13,600 --> 01:00:15,700 it's always easier to remember their names... 1002 01:00:15,700 --> 01:00:18,700 if you use those names right away, Jason and Jonathan. 1003 01:00:20,100 --> 01:00:21,500 He's from Alaska. 1004 01:00:24,500 --> 01:00:25,600 Hi there, Eve. 1005 01:00:25,700 --> 01:00:26,900 Who's the hunk? 1006 01:00:26,900 --> 01:00:28,200 Get lost, Sophie. 1007 01:00:28,300 --> 01:00:29,700 Hi. I'm Sophie. 1008 01:00:29,800 --> 01:00:31,500 Hi. How do you do? I'm Adam Webber. 1009 01:00:31,500 --> 01:00:32,800 Adam lives in Alaska. 1010 01:00:32,800 --> 01:00:34,000 No shit? 1011 01:00:34,000 --> 01:00:36,500 -Vous parlez fran�ais? -Oui. 1012 01:00:36,500 --> 01:00:38,000 Moi, je parle un peu fran�ais. 1013 01:00:38,000 --> 01:00:39,800 Oh, you speak beautiful French. 1014 01:00:39,800 --> 01:00:41,600 J'ai habite � paris un an. 1015 01:00:41,600 --> 01:00:43,200 Paris-- c'est la vie des lumieres... 1016 01:00:43,300 --> 01:00:44,500 -n'est-ce pas? -Oui. 1017 01:00:44,600 --> 01:00:46,900 -C'est le pays d'amour. -Bien sur. 1018 01:00:46,900 --> 01:00:49,300 C'est bien que je vous aie rencontree... 1019 01:00:49,300 --> 01:00:51,500 Parce que je n'ai pas eu la chance de pratiquer. 1020 01:00:51,500 --> 01:00:52,900 Si tu veux, nous pouvons pratiquer... 1021 01:00:53,000 --> 01:00:54,500 Beaucoup de choses ensemble. 1022 01:00:57,000 --> 01:00:58,100 Tais-toi. 1023 01:00:59,700 --> 01:01:00,800 Au revoir. 1024 01:01:00,800 --> 01:01:02,000 Je m'appelle Adam Webber. 1025 01:01:03,400 --> 01:01:04,900 Quit showing off. We're here on business. 1026 01:01:05,000 --> 01:01:06,300 I thought we were here to meet women. 1027 01:01:06,400 --> 01:01:08,300 -Not that one. -I like her. 1028 01:01:08,300 --> 01:01:10,700 Now, Sophie, when you fly to Paris... 1029 01:01:10,800 --> 01:01:13,700 do you check these, or are they carry-on? 1030 01:01:13,700 --> 01:01:15,000 They're carry-on. 1031 01:01:17,600 --> 01:01:18,800 Excuse me. 1032 01:01:25,200 --> 01:01:27,000 What are you drinking? 1033 01:01:27,100 --> 01:01:28,400 Oh, this is a Rob Roy. 1034 01:01:28,500 --> 01:01:30,000 It's a very popular drink I'm told. 1035 01:01:32,400 --> 01:01:33,500 How about her? 1036 01:01:34,300 --> 01:01:35,500 No way. 1037 01:01:37,000 --> 01:01:39,000 Why not? l--I think she's very attractive. 1038 01:01:40,700 --> 01:01:42,700 She's got "bitch" written all over her. 1039 01:01:42,700 --> 01:01:45,900 You do know what "bitch" means, don't you? 1040 01:01:45,900 --> 01:01:47,800 Well, yes, I do. I do have a dictionary... 1041 01:01:47,900 --> 01:01:49,500 but I can't understand for the life of me... 1042 01:01:49,500 --> 01:01:51,400 why you would say that about her... 1043 01:01:51,400 --> 01:01:53,600 or why Cliff would say that about you. 1044 01:01:58,300 --> 01:02:00,400 I think for you we should aim for... 1045 01:02:00,400 --> 01:02:01,700 sweet. 1046 01:02:01,700 --> 01:02:03,900 OK. I like that. 1047 01:02:03,900 --> 01:02:05,400 Yeah, sweet. 1048 01:02:05,400 --> 01:02:07,500 That's a lovely way of putting it. 1049 01:02:09,000 --> 01:02:11,100 There's Miss Sweet over there by the hors d'oeuvres table. 1050 01:02:11,100 --> 01:02:12,200 Look. 1051 01:02:12,200 --> 01:02:14,100 Oh, yeah, yeah. Could be. 1052 01:02:14,100 --> 01:02:16,600 Yeah, go on, Romeo. Say hello. 1053 01:02:16,600 --> 01:02:18,500 She looks like a non-mutant to me. 1054 01:02:18,500 --> 01:02:19,900 OK. All right. 1055 01:02:20,800 --> 01:02:21,900 What do I say to her? 1056 01:02:21,900 --> 01:02:24,500 Oh, say something surprising... 1057 01:02:24,500 --> 01:02:25,700 something funny-- 1058 01:02:26,800 --> 01:02:28,100 Lie, if need be. 1059 01:02:28,200 --> 01:02:30,400 -Lie? -Oh, yeah. 1060 01:02:30,400 --> 01:02:32,800 Lying can be a very effective dating tool. 1061 01:02:36,900 --> 01:02:38,300 All right. 1062 01:02:38,400 --> 01:02:39,700 Here I go. 1063 01:02:43,100 --> 01:02:44,600 I don't think I want to watch this. 1064 01:02:44,600 --> 01:02:46,700 Surprising and funny. 1065 01:02:46,700 --> 01:02:48,500 Well, I know "the duck who bought some lip balm." 1066 01:02:49,900 --> 01:02:51,100 Lie. 1067 01:02:56,500 --> 01:02:58,400 I was wondering if you could help me. 1068 01:02:58,500 --> 01:03:00,500 I, um, seem to have lost... 1069 01:03:00,600 --> 01:03:01,900 my Congressional Medal of Honor... 1070 01:03:01,900 --> 01:03:03,600 around here somewhere. 1071 01:03:05,900 --> 01:03:07,200 Now, that's a great one. 1072 01:03:10,100 --> 01:03:11,900 This is my new friend. 1073 01:03:14,800 --> 01:03:16,500 -Adam Webber. -Hi. I'm Heather. 1074 01:03:18,500 --> 01:03:20,700 I don't believe I've ever heard that name before. 1075 01:03:25,400 --> 01:03:27,000 Yeah, do you dance? 1076 01:03:27,100 --> 01:03:29,200 Why, I took a dance lesson every day of my life... 1077 01:03:29,300 --> 01:03:31,100 up until a couple of days ago. 1078 01:03:31,100 --> 01:03:32,900 -You're kidding. -No, no, I did. 1079 01:03:34,600 --> 01:03:35,900 Shall we dance? 1080 01:03:35,900 --> 01:03:37,200 -Sure. -Yeah? 1081 01:03:41,900 --> 01:03:43,300 Wait for me. 1082 01:05:46,400 --> 01:05:47,600 Is that your girlfriend? 1083 01:05:47,600 --> 01:05:50,100 No, no. Will you please excuse me? 1084 01:05:51,900 --> 01:05:53,800 You -- you go to the bathroom. 1085 01:05:53,800 --> 01:05:54,900 What, right here? 1086 01:05:55,800 --> 01:05:58,400 I thought I should check. You're being so bossy. 1087 01:05:58,400 --> 01:05:59,700 Thank you both very much for the dance. 1088 01:05:59,700 --> 01:06:00,800 Thank you. 1089 01:06:06,300 --> 01:06:08,100 I have to go to the bathroom. 1090 01:06:11,700 --> 01:06:14,900 -You wanted to see me? -You're not from Alaska. 1091 01:06:14,900 --> 01:06:16,500 Where the hell did you learn to dance like that? 1092 01:06:16,500 --> 01:06:19,300 And there are no starving people, are there? 1093 01:06:19,400 --> 01:06:20,700 Why are you so angry with me? 1094 01:06:20,700 --> 01:06:22,900 What, you think I'm some kind of sap? 1095 01:06:22,900 --> 01:06:24,600 No, I don't. 1096 01:06:24,600 --> 01:06:25,600 I admire you. 1097 01:06:25,700 --> 01:06:28,300 I fell in love with you the very moment I saw you. 1098 01:06:28,400 --> 01:06:30,200 I want you to stop lying to me. 1099 01:06:31,700 --> 01:06:33,000 All right. 1100 01:06:33,000 --> 01:06:34,100 I'll tell you everything. 1101 01:06:34,100 --> 01:06:35,600 In 1962-- 1102 01:06:35,600 --> 01:06:37,500 Well, well, well. 1103 01:06:37,500 --> 01:06:39,000 Don't we clean up nice? 1104 01:06:40,900 --> 01:06:42,100 Well, hello, Cliff. 1105 01:06:42,800 --> 01:06:44,300 How are you this evening? 1106 01:06:44,300 --> 01:06:46,000 Not bad... 1107 01:06:46,000 --> 01:06:48,700 though I do miss that green sport coat of yours. 1108 01:06:48,700 --> 01:06:50,000 Oh, why, thank you, Cliff... 1109 01:06:50,000 --> 01:06:51,700 but that's my seat, and I was just about-- 1110 01:06:51,700 --> 01:06:53,500 Come have a drink up at the bar. 1111 01:07:01,200 --> 01:07:02,700 Sure. 1112 01:07:02,800 --> 01:07:03,900 Excuse us. 1113 01:07:05,200 --> 01:07:06,300 It's all yours. 1114 01:07:35,900 --> 01:07:37,400 Please excuse this interruption. 1115 01:07:37,400 --> 01:07:38,500 Oh, brother. 1116 01:07:38,500 --> 01:07:41,100 Eve, I don't mean to be rude, and, Cliff, please excuse me... 1117 01:07:41,100 --> 01:07:44,000 but, Eve, isn't Cliff just a butt with hair? 1118 01:07:44,100 --> 01:07:45,100 What? 1119 01:07:45,200 --> 01:07:48,500 I'm sorry. And legs-- Legs, butt, and hair. 1120 01:07:48,500 --> 01:07:49,600 And shallow as well. 1121 01:07:49,700 --> 01:07:50,700 Shallow? 1122 01:07:50,800 --> 01:07:52,500 Adam, why don't you go home? 1123 01:07:52,500 --> 01:07:53,800 Go back to the hotel. 1124 01:07:53,900 --> 01:07:55,500 Yeah, before I kick your ass. 1125 01:07:56,900 --> 01:07:59,700 I must warn you, Cliff, I do know how to defend myself. 1126 01:07:59,700 --> 01:08:01,300 Oh, do you? 1127 01:08:02,100 --> 01:08:03,500 Stop it, you two. 1128 01:08:03,500 --> 01:08:05,300 Nice move. 1129 01:08:05,300 --> 01:08:07,700 Yeah, he's right. Maybe we shouldn't fight in here. 1130 01:08:08,700 --> 01:08:09,800 I agree. 1131 01:08:13,300 --> 01:08:15,100 I'm sorry. He was going to... 1132 01:08:16,300 --> 01:08:19,100 Maybe we shouldn't fight at all. I mean... 1133 01:08:19,100 --> 01:08:20,800 fighting's pretty immature when you think about it. 1134 01:08:20,800 --> 01:08:22,200 It certainly is. 1135 01:08:24,100 --> 01:08:25,300 I'm leaving. 1136 01:08:25,400 --> 01:08:26,700 That's probably a good idea. 1137 01:08:26,700 --> 01:08:28,100 I'm sorry. 1138 01:08:31,300 --> 01:08:32,800 Well... 1139 01:08:32,900 --> 01:08:34,000 good night, everyone. 1140 01:08:36,400 --> 01:08:38,600 I'm leaving, too, OK? 1141 01:08:38,600 --> 01:08:39,800 And you know what? lf you want help... 1142 01:08:39,800 --> 01:08:41,500 you can ask Troy, because I quit. 1143 01:08:41,600 --> 01:08:43,100 This is ridiculous. 1144 01:08:43,200 --> 01:08:45,800 You're ridiculous, and I'm ridiculous. 1145 01:08:50,400 --> 01:08:52,100 I'll buy you another Rob Roy, huh, champ? 1146 01:08:53,400 --> 01:08:54,800 Rob Roy for the gentleman. 1147 01:09:00,800 --> 01:09:01,900 Well? 1148 01:09:02,900 --> 01:09:04,300 He go back to the hotel? 1149 01:09:04,300 --> 01:09:05,900 He might have. 1150 01:09:05,900 --> 01:09:07,100 What does that mean? 1151 01:09:07,700 --> 01:09:10,300 That means that we did not leave together. 1152 01:09:10,300 --> 01:09:11,900 Well, who did he leave with? 1153 01:09:11,900 --> 01:09:13,900 -What's that to you? -I'm his pimp! 1154 01:09:14,700 --> 01:09:16,700 He left with those dancers, didn't he? 1155 01:09:18,400 --> 01:09:19,500 You're the psychic. 1156 01:09:19,500 --> 01:09:21,500 Eve the psychic pimp. 1157 01:09:21,600 --> 01:09:22,800 You tell me. 1158 01:09:22,900 --> 01:09:24,600 -Those sluts. -Yeah. 1159 01:09:25,700 --> 01:09:27,800 Then again, who isn't a slut these days, huh? 1160 01:09:29,900 --> 01:09:31,000 Where are you going? 1161 01:09:31,000 --> 01:09:33,200 -To bed. -To bed? 1162 01:09:33,300 --> 01:09:35,000 Sure. To bed. 1163 01:09:35,000 --> 01:09:36,800 I'm not the one that's in love with the guy. 1164 01:09:37,700 --> 01:09:38,900 What?! 1165 01:09:39,700 --> 01:09:41,000 Now hold on! 1166 01:09:41,000 --> 01:09:42,900 Hold on just a minute. 1167 01:09:42,900 --> 01:09:44,400 In the first place... 1168 01:09:44,400 --> 01:09:46,400 I do not fall in love with weirdoes... 1169 01:09:46,500 --> 01:09:48,300 who I've only known for four or five days. 1170 01:09:48,300 --> 01:09:49,500 Yes, you do. 1171 01:09:49,500 --> 01:09:51,100 And I don't fall in love with grown men... 1172 01:09:51,100 --> 01:09:52,500 who collect baseball cards! 1173 01:09:52,500 --> 01:09:53,600 Yes, you do. 1174 01:09:53,700 --> 01:09:56,100 Or pee in their pants when they see the ocean. 1175 01:09:56,100 --> 01:09:57,200 Yes, you do. 1176 01:09:57,300 --> 01:09:59,000 Or have perfect table manners. 1177 01:09:59,000 --> 01:10:01,400 You know, I asked him about that. 1178 01:10:01,400 --> 01:10:03,100 He said good manners... 1179 01:10:03,200 --> 01:10:04,600 are just a way of showing other people... 1180 01:10:04,600 --> 01:10:06,000 that we have respect for them. 1181 01:10:06,100 --> 01:10:09,200 I didn't know that. I thought it was a way of acting superior. 1182 01:10:09,300 --> 01:10:10,700 Oh, and you know what else he told me? 1183 01:10:10,700 --> 01:10:12,100 What? 1184 01:10:12,100 --> 01:10:14,700 He thinks I'm a gentleman, and you're a lady. 1185 01:10:17,200 --> 01:10:20,000 Well, consider the source. 1186 01:10:20,700 --> 01:10:22,500 I don't even know what a lady is. 1187 01:10:22,500 --> 01:10:25,300 I know. I thought a gentleman was somebody that owned horses. 1188 01:10:25,300 --> 01:10:26,800 But it turns out... 1189 01:10:26,800 --> 01:10:29,100 the short, simple definition of a lady or a gentleman... 1190 01:10:29,200 --> 01:10:30,900 is someone who always tries to make sure... 1191 01:10:30,900 --> 01:10:32,500 that the people around him or her... 1192 01:10:32,600 --> 01:10:34,800 are as comfortable as possible. 1193 01:10:35,700 --> 01:10:37,800 Where do you think he got all that information? 1194 01:10:37,900 --> 01:10:39,600 Oh, from the oddest place. 1195 01:10:39,600 --> 01:10:41,300 His parents. 1196 01:10:41,300 --> 01:10:43,700 I don't think I got that memo from mine. 1197 01:10:43,700 --> 01:10:46,900 And now, I suppose, he's trying to make those dancers... 1198 01:10:46,900 --> 01:10:49,300 feel as comfortable as possible. 1199 01:10:50,800 --> 01:10:52,200 He didn't go home with them. 1200 01:10:56,900 --> 01:10:58,600 Well... 1201 01:10:58,700 --> 01:11:00,100 He went home with Sophie. 1202 01:11:05,600 --> 01:11:07,100 She swept him out of the room... 1203 01:11:07,100 --> 01:11:09,300 whispering little French sweet-nothings into his ear. 1204 01:11:09,400 --> 01:11:11,700 No, not Sophie. Not Sophie. Don't tell me that. 1205 01:11:11,700 --> 01:11:14,200 So whatcha gonna do, go to her place and kick the door in? 1206 01:11:15,100 --> 01:11:16,800 You're goddamn right I am. 1207 01:11:18,600 --> 01:11:19,800 You coming? 1208 01:11:19,800 --> 01:11:21,900 You kidding? Sophie'd kill me. 1209 01:11:23,200 --> 01:11:24,300 Coward. 1210 01:11:24,300 --> 01:11:26,700 Gentleman coward. 1211 01:11:43,700 --> 01:11:47,300 So just scare me, why don't you, you stupid son of a bitch! 1212 01:11:47,400 --> 01:11:48,900 I'm really sorry. 1213 01:11:48,900 --> 01:11:50,000 What are you doing here? 1214 01:11:50,000 --> 01:11:52,100 You're supposed to be on San Vicente Boulevard... 1215 01:11:52,200 --> 01:11:55,500 having unsafe sex with that slut Sophie. 1216 01:11:55,500 --> 01:11:57,600 I know, and I'm really sorry. 1217 01:11:57,600 --> 01:11:58,800 I'm limping! 1218 01:11:58,900 --> 01:12:00,300 How attractive is that?! 1219 01:12:00,300 --> 01:12:01,900 What if this is for life? 1220 01:12:03,800 --> 01:12:05,800 -I--I was just gonna say-- -I know. 1221 01:12:05,800 --> 01:12:08,200 -And then she-- -I know, I know. 1222 01:12:08,200 --> 01:12:10,300 -And I didn't mean to scare her. -Of course you didn't. 1223 01:12:10,300 --> 01:12:12,700 Nothing I do with her ever seems to be right. 1224 01:12:15,300 --> 01:12:16,900 That's because... 1225 01:12:16,900 --> 01:12:18,500 you're a nice boy... 1226 01:12:18,500 --> 01:12:21,000 but what Eve needs is a nice man. 1227 01:12:21,100 --> 01:12:22,800 Understand, champ? 1228 01:12:22,800 --> 01:12:23,900 Good night. 1229 01:12:25,100 --> 01:12:26,200 Good night, Troy. 1230 01:12:27,300 --> 01:12:28,400 You still here? 1231 01:12:28,400 --> 01:12:30,600 -Let me help you. -No. I can do it myself. 1232 01:12:30,600 --> 01:12:32,500 I know more about first aid than you know about baseball cards. 1233 01:12:32,600 --> 01:12:34,400 Now give me the stuff and sit down. 1234 01:12:35,100 --> 01:12:36,400 Sit! 1235 01:12:37,900 --> 01:12:39,300 Let me see. 1236 01:12:39,300 --> 01:12:40,400 Give me your knee. 1237 01:12:42,600 --> 01:12:43,900 These pants are ruined, right? 1238 01:12:43,900 --> 01:12:45,000 I'd say so. 1239 01:12:45,100 --> 01:12:46,200 There. 1240 01:12:52,100 --> 01:12:53,500 Steady. 1241 01:12:54,700 --> 01:12:55,900 There. 1242 01:12:55,900 --> 01:12:57,100 Don't be such a baby. 1243 01:12:57,100 --> 01:12:59,100 Oh, I'm the baby? 1244 01:13:08,400 --> 01:13:09,800 Did, um... 1245 01:13:11,600 --> 01:13:13,600 Did you go to Sophie's? 1246 01:13:14,700 --> 01:13:16,100 Of course. 1247 01:13:17,500 --> 01:13:18,600 And? 1248 01:13:19,900 --> 01:13:21,100 She was hospitable. 1249 01:13:21,200 --> 01:13:22,600 Hospitable? 1250 01:13:28,100 --> 01:13:29,800 But... 1251 01:13:29,800 --> 01:13:31,900 it just wasn't where I wanted to be... 1252 01:13:31,900 --> 01:13:33,800 so... 1253 01:13:33,800 --> 01:13:36,000 I left as politely as I could... 1254 01:13:36,100 --> 01:13:37,900 and I found a taxi... 1255 01:13:38,000 --> 01:13:39,500 and I told the driver to bring me here... 1256 01:13:39,600 --> 01:13:41,500 instead of back to the hotel. 1257 01:13:44,700 --> 01:13:48,200 There's a song that Mr. Como sings... 1258 01:13:48,200 --> 01:13:49,900 called "On the Street Where You Live." 1259 01:13:50,000 --> 01:13:51,100 Do you know it? 1260 01:13:52,500 --> 01:13:54,300 Sing it to me. 1261 01:13:59,600 --> 01:14:01,300 I have often walked 1262 01:14:01,300 --> 01:14:02,800 Down this street before 1263 01:14:03,900 --> 01:14:05,800 But the pavement always stayed 1264 01:14:05,800 --> 01:14:07,900 Beneath my feet before 1265 01:14:08,800 --> 01:14:10,700 All at once am I 1266 01:14:11,600 --> 01:14:14,100 Several stories high 1267 01:14:14,200 --> 01:14:16,900 Knowing I'm on the street 1268 01:14:16,900 --> 01:14:18,700 Where you live 1269 01:14:19,700 --> 01:14:22,500 It's a song about a young man... 1270 01:14:22,500 --> 01:14:25,500 who's overjoyed... 1271 01:14:27,200 --> 01:14:29,500 just to be standing in front of the house... 1272 01:14:30,500 --> 01:14:32,000 of the person... 1273 01:14:33,600 --> 01:14:35,000 that he loves. 1274 01:14:49,900 --> 01:14:51,500 You know, l-- 1275 01:14:59,700 --> 01:15:02,200 Adam, I know this is stupid... 1276 01:15:03,300 --> 01:15:05,000 but humor me. 1277 01:15:08,500 --> 01:15:10,500 -Have you ever had sex before? -No... 1278 01:15:16,400 --> 01:15:19,000 How is that possible? 1279 01:15:19,900 --> 01:15:21,700 You better sit back down. 1280 01:15:25,400 --> 01:15:28,300 In 1962, when the bomb was dropped on Los Angeles... 1281 01:15:28,300 --> 01:15:30,700 my parents were in our fallout shelter. 1282 01:15:30,800 --> 01:15:32,100 That's where I was born. 1283 01:15:33,300 --> 01:15:36,100 We only survived because it's a huge shelter... 1284 01:15:36,100 --> 01:15:38,000 as far as fallout shelters go. 1285 01:15:39,000 --> 01:15:42,100 My father worked on it secretly for years. 1286 01:15:42,100 --> 01:15:43,200 When he had to... 1287 01:15:43,300 --> 01:15:44,700 he used contractors... 1288 01:15:44,700 --> 01:15:46,100 but always from out of state... 1289 01:15:46,100 --> 01:15:47,900 and always for only a portion of the job. 1290 01:15:47,900 --> 01:15:50,400 He told them it was a secret government experiment... 1291 01:15:50,500 --> 01:15:51,800 done through Cal Tech. 1292 01:15:51,900 --> 01:15:53,300 Now, my dad's not a liar... 1293 01:15:53,300 --> 01:15:56,200 but in this case, he felt he had no choice. 1294 01:15:56,200 --> 01:15:58,300 Of course, it had to be kept a secret. 1295 01:15:58,300 --> 01:15:59,400 We only had enough supplies... 1296 01:15:59,500 --> 01:16:02,100 to last three people for thirty-five years. 1297 01:16:02,200 --> 01:16:04,800 The really tricky part was the air-vent system... 1298 01:16:04,800 --> 01:16:07,100 but we were able to cut into the flood-control sewer. 1299 01:16:07,100 --> 01:16:09,100 We... 1300 01:16:13,600 --> 01:16:15,500 What I would like to do... 1301 01:16:15,500 --> 01:16:18,200 is to take you with me into the fallout shelter. 1302 01:16:19,100 --> 01:16:21,000 We could live there with my mom and dad. 1303 01:16:22,100 --> 01:16:24,500 My dad said that if I found a healthy young girl... 1304 01:16:24,500 --> 01:16:27,300 that...that I should bring her on down. 1305 01:16:27,400 --> 01:16:28,900 Why, Eve... 1306 01:16:30,800 --> 01:16:33,500 you look plenty healthy to me. 1307 01:16:41,800 --> 01:16:44,700 I think it's time to call a cab. 1308 01:16:46,600 --> 01:16:49,100 Oh. Of course. You're absolutely right. 1309 01:16:49,100 --> 01:16:51,400 I really shouldn't be over here at this late hour. 1310 01:17:00,100 --> 01:17:01,500 Good night, Adam. 1311 01:17:07,600 --> 01:17:08,900 Thank you. 1312 01:17:26,400 --> 01:17:27,700 God damn, Adam ! 1313 01:17:27,800 --> 01:17:29,100 Wait a minute. 1314 01:17:30,700 --> 01:17:32,700 Oh, look, I'm sorry. 1315 01:17:32,700 --> 01:17:35,400 I know. I took the Lord's name in vain again. I-- 1316 01:17:35,500 --> 01:17:38,100 No. There's an adult bookstore back there. 1317 01:17:38,200 --> 01:17:39,800 I'll be right back. 1318 01:17:53,300 --> 01:17:54,500 Give us a sign! 1319 01:17:54,600 --> 01:17:55,600 -Amen! -Yes! 1320 01:17:55,600 --> 01:17:57,000 That's all we ask. 1321 01:17:57,000 --> 01:18:00,000 Just give us some sort of sign! 1322 01:18:00,700 --> 01:18:03,400 Just show us that we're not alone! 1323 01:18:29,800 --> 01:18:31,400 This is, uh... 1324 01:18:31,400 --> 01:18:32,700 Hi, Adam. I'm Nina Aron. 1325 01:18:33,700 --> 01:18:35,700 -Hello. How do you do? -Very well, thank you. 1326 01:18:35,700 --> 01:18:38,100 I'm with the County Family Services Department. 1327 01:18:38,200 --> 01:18:41,700 Eve tells me you've been living in a bomb shelter... 1328 01:18:41,800 --> 01:18:42,900 most of your life. 1329 01:18:44,200 --> 01:18:45,400 Fallout shelter. 1330 01:18:45,400 --> 01:18:47,400 There is a difference. 1331 01:18:47,500 --> 01:18:50,700 Adam, I'd like to introduce you to my associate Mr. Brown. 1332 01:18:54,900 --> 01:18:56,700 We want you to come with us... 1333 01:18:56,700 --> 01:18:58,700 so we can talk some more about your experiences. 1334 01:18:58,800 --> 01:18:59,900 Come where? 1335 01:18:59,900 --> 01:19:01,600 My office. 1336 01:19:01,700 --> 01:19:02,700 For how long? 1337 01:19:03,800 --> 01:19:05,500 Well, that depends. 1338 01:19:05,500 --> 01:19:07,900 Well, I thank you very much for the invitation... 1339 01:19:07,900 --> 01:19:09,500 but I'm very busy today. 1340 01:19:09,500 --> 01:19:10,700 Perhaps I could see you tomorrow. 1341 01:19:10,700 --> 01:19:13,600 I think you should go with Dr. Aron. 1342 01:19:14,800 --> 01:19:16,200 I think it's the best thing. 1343 01:19:17,600 --> 01:19:20,200 I think it's best for you. I--I do. 1344 01:19:25,700 --> 01:19:27,300 All right, Eve. If you say so. 1345 01:19:28,700 --> 01:19:29,800 I do. 1346 01:19:32,500 --> 01:19:34,400 Could I please just go home? 1347 01:19:34,500 --> 01:19:36,800 I was lost, but I found home this morning. 1348 01:19:36,900 --> 01:19:39,100 And if I can just go home... 1349 01:19:39,100 --> 01:19:41,100 I promise I'll never bother any of you ever again. 1350 01:19:42,700 --> 01:19:44,500 Let's go talk first. 1351 01:20:04,600 --> 01:20:06,000 Yes Ma'am. 1352 01:20:10,900 --> 01:20:12,100 What?! 1353 01:20:12,100 --> 01:20:13,700 What was I supposed to do? 1354 01:20:13,700 --> 01:20:15,600 He told me he wanted to take me underground. 1355 01:20:15,700 --> 01:20:16,900 That's like "Silence of the Lambs." 1356 01:20:17,000 --> 01:20:18,400 It's crazy! 1357 01:20:19,400 --> 01:20:21,900 Yeah. You did the right thing. 1358 01:20:27,600 --> 01:20:28,900 Where you going? 1359 01:20:30,400 --> 01:20:31,800 Oh, my God. 1360 01:20:31,900 --> 01:20:34,000 All right, don't worry. He'll catch him. 1361 01:20:34,100 --> 01:20:35,500 Yes, this is Nina Aron. 1362 01:20:35,600 --> 01:20:37,900 I've got a runaway, and I'm going to need police assistance. 1363 01:20:38,000 --> 01:20:40,800 -No, you cannot call them. -Honey, I have to. 1364 01:20:40,900 --> 01:20:43,100 If a complaint is made and the person resists-- 1365 01:20:43,200 --> 01:20:44,500 No! I cannot have that! 1366 01:20:44,500 --> 01:20:48,200 They'll come with their cars and their guns and-- 1367 01:20:48,300 --> 01:20:49,300 All right. Calm down. 1368 01:20:49,300 --> 01:20:50,600 Now, that young man needs help... 1369 01:20:50,600 --> 01:20:52,200 and you need protection from him. 1370 01:20:52,300 --> 01:20:53,500 I was frightened! 1371 01:20:53,500 --> 01:20:56,500 I didn't know what to think, but, you know... 1372 01:20:56,500 --> 01:20:58,000 I believe him. 1373 01:20:58,000 --> 01:20:59,400 I think he just-- 1374 01:20:59,400 --> 01:21:02,100 I really think he wants to go home-- 1375 01:21:02,100 --> 01:21:03,400 wherever that might be. 1376 01:21:03,500 --> 01:21:05,000 Everybody has to calm down. 1377 01:21:05,000 --> 01:21:06,500 That's the most important thing. 1378 01:21:07,900 --> 01:21:09,300 You can have all my baseball cards... 1379 01:21:09,300 --> 01:21:10,400 and don't forget to pay my bills. 1380 01:21:10,500 --> 01:21:12,100 Young man, you stop right there! 1381 01:21:12,100 --> 01:21:14,400 Stop! Don't get in that truck! 1382 01:21:15,500 --> 01:21:16,900 You gotta stop trying to drive this truck. 1383 01:21:18,300 --> 01:21:19,700 Thanks for always being happy. 1384 01:21:19,800 --> 01:21:21,900 -What? -Gay. 1385 01:21:26,600 --> 01:21:29,300 That's my car, you son of a bitch! 1386 01:21:30,000 --> 01:21:31,400 Where the hell have you been? 1387 01:21:31,400 --> 01:21:32,500 I fell down. 1388 01:21:32,500 --> 01:21:34,400 You guys get the license number on that truck? 1389 01:21:34,500 --> 01:21:37,500 What are you asking them for? They're as screwed up as he is! 1390 01:21:37,500 --> 01:21:39,700 Hey, everybody keep calm. That's the important thing. 1391 01:21:39,700 --> 01:21:41,500 Who you talking to, you stupid... 1392 01:21:54,100 --> 01:21:55,600 Mom, Dad... I'm home. 1393 01:22:02,400 --> 01:22:04,600 I've got almost everything we need. 1394 01:22:04,700 --> 01:22:06,100 And this nice man... 1395 01:22:06,100 --> 01:22:07,500 Archbishop Melker. 1396 01:22:07,500 --> 01:22:08,900 We've met previously. 1397 01:22:09,000 --> 01:22:10,400 ...and his church group 1398 01:22:10,400 --> 01:22:11,800 have volunteered to help bring it down... 1399 01:22:11,800 --> 01:22:13,200 but we've gotta hurry. 1400 01:22:13,300 --> 01:22:14,900 Are you in trouble, son? 1401 01:22:14,900 --> 01:22:16,800 I think I'm being chased by a psychiatrist. 1402 01:22:16,800 --> 01:22:18,200 A psychiatrist? 1403 01:22:18,300 --> 01:22:19,300 It happens. 1404 01:22:19,400 --> 01:22:20,800 Oh, my goodness. 1405 01:22:20,800 --> 01:22:22,900 How bad is it up there? 1406 01:22:22,900 --> 01:22:25,000 Horrible. 1407 01:22:26,400 --> 01:22:28,600 There's something on your forehead. 1408 01:22:29,600 --> 01:22:30,900 I know. 1409 01:23:06,600 --> 01:23:07,700 Is this it? 1410 01:23:11,600 --> 01:23:14,300 Well, what are we gonna do with it? 1411 01:23:14,300 --> 01:23:15,700 Give it back to him. 1412 01:23:15,700 --> 01:23:17,300 And what if we can't find him? 1413 01:23:17,400 --> 01:23:18,800 We'll find him. 1414 01:23:18,800 --> 01:23:19,900 Well... 1415 01:23:42,600 --> 01:23:45,300 Eve, look what I found in the suitcase. 1416 01:23:45,300 --> 01:23:46,800 It's stock certificates. 1417 01:23:46,800 --> 01:23:48,300 I mean, it's got, like-- 1418 01:23:48,400 --> 01:23:52,000 It's got, like, IBM and AT&T and Polaroid and... 1419 01:23:52,100 --> 01:23:53,800 "Ipana"? 1420 01:23:53,800 --> 01:23:55,700 I remember this brand. 1421 01:23:55,700 --> 01:23:57,600 I didn't know they still made this. 1422 01:24:00,400 --> 01:24:02,600 Oh. Look at this. 1423 01:24:02,600 --> 01:24:05,100 It says "Trademark 1961." 1424 01:24:09,300 --> 01:24:11,500 Hurry, my friends! We have no time to waste! 1425 01:24:11,600 --> 01:24:12,900 The son has spoken! 1426 01:24:12,900 --> 01:24:14,300 Let's step it up! 1427 01:24:14,300 --> 01:24:16,700 Leave my elevator alone 1428 01:24:16,700 --> 01:24:18,300 Leave my elevator alone 1429 01:24:18,300 --> 01:24:20,900 We're losing a ride! 1430 01:24:20,900 --> 01:24:23,100 Purchased in 1958 and '59... 1431 01:24:23,100 --> 01:24:25,400 ten thousand shares of each? 1432 01:24:25,400 --> 01:24:26,800 They'd be worth millions. 1433 01:24:26,800 --> 01:24:27,900 Hell, I don't know. 1434 01:24:27,900 --> 01:24:29,700 Millions upon millions... 1435 01:24:29,800 --> 01:24:31,100 Upon millions. 1436 01:24:32,100 --> 01:24:33,600 The stocks, the baseball cards... 1437 01:24:33,700 --> 01:24:35,200 the clothes... 1438 01:24:35,300 --> 01:24:36,800 the toothpaste. 1439 01:24:38,000 --> 01:24:39,200 The guy's on the level. 1440 01:24:41,700 --> 01:24:44,100 Eve, a man walks into your life... 1441 01:24:44,100 --> 01:24:46,000 who's the kindest, most polite... 1442 01:24:46,100 --> 01:24:48,100 most incredibly rich guy you've ever met. 1443 01:24:48,100 --> 01:24:49,700 And I have him committed. 1444 01:24:51,800 --> 01:24:53,200 Yes, you did. 1445 01:24:56,400 --> 01:24:58,100 Well... 1446 01:24:58,100 --> 01:25:00,300 at least I fell for him before I found out he was rich. 1447 01:25:00,300 --> 01:25:01,400 That's new. 1448 01:25:04,000 --> 01:25:06,300 He said today he knew where home was. 1449 01:25:06,400 --> 01:25:08,000 Where'd you guys go this morning? 1450 01:25:09,100 --> 01:25:11,500 Just to pick up frozen poultry. 1451 01:25:11,500 --> 01:25:12,600 Then? 1452 01:25:12,600 --> 01:25:14,300 Then back to the house. 1453 01:25:14,400 --> 01:25:15,800 You didn't stop anywhere? 1454 01:25:18,700 --> 01:25:20,700 We did. We stopped at a porn shop. 1455 01:25:21,700 --> 01:25:23,000 Yeah, we stopped at this adult bookstore. 1456 01:25:23,100 --> 01:25:25,400 Adam was very excited to see it. 1457 01:25:25,400 --> 01:25:27,300 -Adam was very excited to see porn? -Yes. 1458 01:25:29,600 --> 01:25:32,900 Eve, do you think maybe his home is underneath... 1459 01:25:32,900 --> 01:25:34,600 a dirty book store in the valley? 1460 01:25:40,200 --> 01:25:41,300 This is it? 1461 01:25:41,300 --> 01:25:43,100 Yeah. Yeah, this is the place. 1462 01:26:07,600 --> 01:26:09,500 Do you have a basement? 1463 01:26:09,500 --> 01:26:13,300 Believe me, all the really good stuff is right up front. 1464 01:26:15,500 --> 01:26:17,200 Is there a back entrance or something? 1465 01:26:17,200 --> 01:26:19,200 Are you kidding? Of course. 1466 01:26:19,300 --> 01:26:21,000 Nice kid. Nice kid. 1467 01:26:24,000 --> 01:26:26,800 What are we looking for? This is ridiculous. 1468 01:26:26,800 --> 01:26:29,700 Why would they put a fallout shelter under a porn shop? 1469 01:26:29,700 --> 01:26:31,000 None of this was here back in '62. 1470 01:26:31,100 --> 01:26:33,500 Back then this was all, like, cute little homes... 1471 01:26:33,500 --> 01:26:36,300 and, you know, fruit orchards. 1472 01:26:36,300 --> 01:26:38,400 We've come a long way, haven't we? 1473 01:26:40,200 --> 01:26:41,700 I wanna go home. 1474 01:26:41,800 --> 01:26:43,800 Yeah. Maybe he'll call, huh? 1475 01:26:46,900 --> 01:26:48,300 This is Adam. 1476 01:26:49,600 --> 01:26:52,600 Look, I just wanted to thank you for everything you did for me. 1477 01:26:52,700 --> 01:26:54,100 And... 1478 01:26:54,100 --> 01:26:55,800 I wanted to tell you that l... 1479 01:26:57,000 --> 01:26:58,400 that, uh... 1480 01:26:58,400 --> 01:27:01,600 that I--that I wish so many good things for you. 1481 01:27:01,600 --> 01:27:05,100 I wish so hard that all of your dreams come true. 1482 01:27:05,100 --> 01:27:06,500 And... 1483 01:27:06,600 --> 01:27:08,900 and that-- and that's all I... 1484 01:27:09,000 --> 01:27:10,400 And that's all. 1485 01:27:34,500 --> 01:27:36,900 Your ride stinks! 1486 01:27:41,100 --> 01:27:42,800 Stay outta here, you drunk! 1487 01:28:46,300 --> 01:28:48,200 How long you gonna set it for this time? 1488 01:28:48,300 --> 01:28:50,000 I thought ten years. 1489 01:28:51,100 --> 01:28:52,500 Well, it's... 1490 01:28:52,600 --> 01:28:55,400 considerably shorter than before, but... 1491 01:28:56,400 --> 01:28:58,800 I was wondering, Calvin, I mean... 1492 01:28:58,800 --> 01:29:00,200 why set the locks at all? 1493 01:29:00,300 --> 01:29:02,000 I mean, the radiation's gone. 1494 01:29:02,000 --> 01:29:04,400 To keep what's up there from getting down here. 1495 01:29:04,400 --> 01:29:06,800 It's not radiation I'm worried about. 1496 01:29:18,900 --> 01:29:20,300 I would like for you to meet... 1497 01:29:20,300 --> 01:29:22,000 Miss Eve Vrustikov. 1498 01:29:26,900 --> 01:29:29,600 Adam's told me such wonderful things about you. 1499 01:29:29,600 --> 01:29:31,200 Oh, honey... 1500 01:29:31,200 --> 01:29:32,800 excuse us, please. 1501 01:29:32,900 --> 01:29:34,700 We haven't entertained a guest... 1502 01:29:34,800 --> 01:29:36,200 In quite some time. 1503 01:29:36,200 --> 01:29:39,200 Oh, Eve, what-- what can I offer you? 1504 01:29:39,300 --> 01:29:40,800 Mom, Eve and I have to go. 1505 01:29:40,900 --> 01:29:42,500 Oh, Adam, you just got here. 1506 01:29:42,500 --> 01:29:43,900 I can't explain right now... 1507 01:29:43,900 --> 01:29:45,800 but I want you to set the locks for two months. 1508 01:29:45,900 --> 01:29:47,500 You've got more than enough of everything... 1509 01:29:47,600 --> 01:29:49,500 and then we'll be right back to get you. 1510 01:29:49,500 --> 01:29:51,000 But I don't understand. 1511 01:29:51,000 --> 01:29:52,900 And I'm asking you to trust me... 1512 01:29:52,900 --> 01:29:54,200 without understanding why. 1513 01:29:54,300 --> 01:29:55,900 In that case, of course. 1514 01:29:55,900 --> 01:29:57,800 Oh, of course, son. 1515 01:29:57,800 --> 01:30:00,200 They really are wonderful parents. 1516 01:30:01,600 --> 01:30:03,500 It's truly amazing what you can get done... 1517 01:30:03,500 --> 01:30:04,700 when you have unlimited funds. 1518 01:30:04,800 --> 01:30:07,400 Do you know you can have whole houses built... 1519 01:30:07,400 --> 01:30:09,300 in just a matter of months? 1520 01:30:09,300 --> 01:30:11,500 It's like the Garden of Eden, don't you think? 1521 01:30:11,500 --> 01:30:13,100 All you have to say is this... 1522 01:30:13,100 --> 01:30:14,500 "I don't care what it costs." 1523 01:30:14,600 --> 01:30:15,700 And then, of course, you've got to really mean it... 1524 01:30:15,700 --> 01:30:17,400 which no one ever does. 1525 01:30:18,200 --> 01:30:20,600 It took a while to convince Archbishop Melker... 1526 01:30:20,700 --> 01:30:22,100 that Adam wasn't God... 1527 01:30:22,100 --> 01:30:24,300 and he was pretty broken up about it, too... 1528 01:30:24,300 --> 01:30:25,800 until I showed him my plans... 1529 01:30:25,900 --> 01:30:28,300 for Los Angeles' hottest and most original night spot. 1530 01:30:28,300 --> 01:30:29,700 It's my goddamned malt shop. 1531 01:30:29,800 --> 01:30:32,100 Now let's just figure out what's gonna happen here. 1532 01:30:32,100 --> 01:30:34,000 Now I want the whole ownership... 1533 01:30:34,000 --> 01:30:35,900 of everything downstairs, right? 1534 01:30:35,900 --> 01:30:38,400 I want one of my guys at the door. 1535 01:30:41,200 --> 01:30:43,200 Our idea was to bring Adam's parents... 1536 01:30:43,300 --> 01:30:45,800 up to the surface very slowly... 1537 01:30:45,900 --> 01:30:47,300 make them very comfortable... 1538 01:30:47,300 --> 01:30:49,200 and then break the bad news to them... 1539 01:30:49,200 --> 01:30:51,600 that there was no nuclear holocaust. 1540 01:31:18,800 --> 01:31:20,700 Oh, son. 1541 01:31:24,500 --> 01:31:26,500 Have you ever in your life... 1542 01:31:26,600 --> 01:31:29,000 seen a son who did more for his parents? 1543 01:31:29,900 --> 01:31:31,900 This is beautiful. 1544 01:31:33,300 --> 01:31:35,700 It's absolutely beautiful. 1545 01:31:35,700 --> 01:31:37,900 Well, uh... 1546 01:31:37,900 --> 01:31:39,800 we seem to have everything... 1547 01:31:39,900 --> 01:31:41,600 but, you know... 1548 01:31:42,700 --> 01:31:44,600 it's not much different... 1549 01:31:44,700 --> 01:31:46,100 from a fallout shelter. 1550 01:31:47,300 --> 01:31:48,700 No, Calvin. 1551 01:31:48,700 --> 01:31:49,900 This is different. 1552 01:31:49,900 --> 01:31:51,400 Believe me. 1553 01:31:54,800 --> 01:31:57,300 This is great... 1554 01:31:57,300 --> 01:31:58,700 son. 1555 01:32:03,100 --> 01:32:04,300 Dad, I don't know how to tell you this... 1556 01:32:04,400 --> 01:32:07,800 and I was gonna wait for a while to do it, but... 1557 01:32:10,300 --> 01:32:12,000 Dad, there was no bomb. 1558 01:32:12,100 --> 01:32:14,100 A plane crashed in our backyard. 1559 01:32:14,100 --> 01:32:16,400 I looked it up in old newspapers. 1560 01:32:17,300 --> 01:32:19,700 -You sure? -Positive. 1561 01:32:19,700 --> 01:32:22,600 The Soviet Union collapsed without a shot being fired. 1562 01:32:22,600 --> 01:32:24,300 The cold war's over. 1563 01:32:24,800 --> 01:32:27,100 What, the politburo... 1564 01:32:27,200 --> 01:32:28,300 one day said... 1565 01:32:29,400 --> 01:32:30,700 "we give up"? 1566 01:32:32,500 --> 01:32:34,000 Yes, just... 1567 01:32:34,100 --> 01:32:35,500 That's kinda how it went. 1568 01:32:35,500 --> 01:32:37,000 By gosh! 1569 01:32:37,000 --> 01:32:38,800 These commies are brilliant. 1570 01:32:38,900 --> 01:32:40,700 You have to hand it to them. 1571 01:32:40,800 --> 01:32:43,300 No, we didn't drop any bombs. 1572 01:32:43,300 --> 01:32:47,600 Oh, yeah. Our evil empire has collapsed. Poor us. 1573 01:32:47,600 --> 01:32:49,300 I'll bet... 1574 01:32:49,400 --> 01:32:51,700 they even asked the West for aid. 1575 01:32:51,800 --> 01:32:53,200 Right? 1576 01:32:53,200 --> 01:32:55,700 Um, I think they did. 1577 01:32:55,800 --> 01:32:56,900 Oh, boys. 1578 01:32:56,900 --> 01:32:58,800 Dinnertime! 1579 01:32:58,800 --> 01:33:00,300 Pot roast. 1580 01:33:05,200 --> 01:33:06,600 I tell ya. 1581 01:33:08,700 --> 01:33:10,200 Funny guy. 1582 01:33:11,200 --> 01:33:13,300 -Don't tell your mother. -No. 1583 01:33:14,500 --> 01:33:17,300 Adam says that this is simply how things work. 1584 01:33:17,400 --> 01:33:19,700 First the parents take care of the children... 1585 01:33:19,800 --> 01:33:22,600 and then the children take care of the parents. 1586 01:33:22,700 --> 01:33:25,700 He says, historically, that's how it works. 1587 01:33:25,700 --> 01:33:27,600 Damn commies. 1588 01:33:31,400 --> 01:33:32,500 Whenever Adam gives me... 1589 01:33:32,600 --> 01:33:35,100 such obviously incorrect information... 1590 01:33:35,100 --> 01:33:38,700 I just smile, slap him on the knee... 1591 01:33:38,700 --> 01:33:39,900 and look out the window. 1592 01:33:40,600 --> 01:33:42,800 Why spoil his dreams? 1593 01:33:42,900 --> 01:33:45,100 They're such wonderful dreams.