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[♪♪♪]
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NARRATOR:
Here's a little story I'd like to tell...
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...about three best friends
and their first Noel.
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It begins right before Christmas 2001...
5
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...when a young man named Ethan
became an orphan.
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His mama and papa
both tragically gone...
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...it seemed for him
Christmas had sung its swan song.
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As he sat alone on Christmas Eve...
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...his friends came over
and forced him to leave.
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They had to get Ethan out of his funk...
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...so they went to a bar
and they got his ass drunk.
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With tears and with sadness
they started to mend. Then they said:
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No more crying.
This sad shit must end.
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Christmas was about family,
but now it's about friends.
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NARRATOR:
Thus began a new tradition.
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The friends hung on Christmas
and fun was their mission.
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Who's the baddest motherfucker
on Christmas day?
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CHRIS: Get in there.
ISAAC: Aww!
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You knew.
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CHRIS: Boom!
ETHAN: What is it?
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CHRIS: That shit holds a hundred songs
at one time.
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I got the new Dave Matthews
downloaded.
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ISAAC: Oh, yeah. Ricky Martin.
- Oh!
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That guy slays ass.
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NARRATOR: They chilled
with each other, did all sorts of stuff.
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They drank many drinks,
they fucked shit up.
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ISAAC:
Light his dick.
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[LAUGHS]
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Unh!
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NARRATOR:
Then one fateful night, 2008...
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...they realized that Christmas
can be even more great.
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That eve at the bar,
they saw quite a sight.
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Fellow seekers ofjoy
having one crazy night.
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And there was a woman,
so pretty to all.
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They worked up the courage,
proceeded to call.
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- Excuse me.
- Ethan said. And she turned with a fright.
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Where were you guys partying
earlier tonight?
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At a place so great
words cannot describe...
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...with so many drinks
for one to imbibe.
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With so many drugs,
I can't believe I survived.
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What the fuck...
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Ethan asked.
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...is this party called?
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Why, you haven't heard?
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It's the Nutcracker Ball.
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NARRATOR:
They asked all around, but to no avail.
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Where was this great party,
this whitest of whales?
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And though year upon year
they tried and they failed...
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...they never did tire,
they never did bail.
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But over time, the fun did wane.
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One friend had a family,
the other had fame.
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As the years passed,
his boys, they grew up.
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But it seems our boy Ethan
is just a little bit stuck.
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What's up, buddy? No?
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All right. You guys want any of this?
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- No, thank you.
- Cool.
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MAN:
Keep it moving. There you go.
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Yes, good.
59
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Wait. No, no, no. What are you doing?
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No one was eating this tuna,
so I thought...
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No, no, no. You don't get to
make those executive decisions, elf.
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How old are you?
63
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- Thirty-three.
- Thirty-three. Heh, heh.
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Thirty-three years old, and you're an elf.
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And you don't even know
how to be an elf.
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Show me the elf face.
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Uh...
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It's happy. It's eager.
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More whimsical.
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Whimsy. Determined, though.
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- There you go! That's it!
- That was it.
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That's why you're coming back here
with a full tray.
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I'm gonna move you to coat check.
This is your last chance.
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And the whole time,
I wanna see that elf face.
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ETHAN: Okay.
- Starting now.
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Go.
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Go.
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These two are together.
No, gotta take the ticket.
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Hi. Just you, sir?
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Great. This is your ticket.
Please try not to lose it.
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This is a very expensive coat,
so take care of it.
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WOMAN:
Absolutely, sir.
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Here, ticket. Okay, this one.
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ETHAN:
Yeah.
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WOMAN:
Yeah. Great.
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Hi. Merry Christmas, sir.
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♪ The cold wind is blowing
And the streets are getting dark ♪
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♪ I'm writing you a letter
And I don't know where to start ♪
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♪ The bells will be ringing
St. John the Divine ♪
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♪ I get a little lonely
Every year around this time ♪
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WOMAN:
Hey, what are you doing?
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Huh? Nothing.
93
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I'm gonna be right back.
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Now, where are you going?
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I'm sick. Sick.
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MAN:
Whoa!
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♪ I've gotta know ♪
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♪ Nobody ought to be
Alone on Christmas ♪
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♪ Where do lonely hearts go? ♪
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♪ Nobody ought to be
Alone on Christmas ♪
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♪ Nobody ought to be
Alone on Christmas ♪
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MAN [ON RECORDING]: You're about
to have the best night of your life.
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You will learn valuable lessons,
be filled with Christmas cheer...
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...and probably get laid.
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We will release the location
of our party at 10 p.m.
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Merry Christmas.
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[CHEERING AND LAUGHING]
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[♪♪♪]
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♪ Tell me, I gotta know ♪
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♪ Nobody ought to be
Alone on Christmas ♪
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♪ Where do lonely hearts go? ♪
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♪ Nobody ought to be
Alone on Christmas ♪
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♪ Nobody ought to be
Alone on Christmas ♪
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Yeah, I know, Ma. I'm sorry,
but I have to stay here and work hard.
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How you think I'm having
such an amazing season?
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I love you too. Merry Christmas.
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Bye.
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♪ Tell me, I gotta know ♪♪
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What's up, fellas?
How's it going, man?
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Good to see you, baby.
Merry Christmas.
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You wanna take a picture, man?
Let's do it.
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Just leave it!
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If you're not Christian, what are you?
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I'm Jewish.
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Is that why you look different?
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What was that? Come again.
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You just look funny.
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I look funny?
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You ever see The Shining?
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- Isaac?
- Yo!
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What are you telling them?
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I'm just talking
to your lovely daughters...
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...as though they are adults.
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From a cognitive level,
if you speak to kids like they're adults...
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...it will make them more curious,
it will open up their minds to more things.
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- He's gonna be a great father.
- Yeah.
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I just hope we have kids
as beautiful as you girls.
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- Ow!
BETSY: I'm sorry.
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Sweeties, just come help Mommy
in the kitchen.
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- Are you okay? You want a hug?
- That's okay.
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BETSY:
Okay.
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- Gosh, I am such a fucking piece of shit.
- No, you're not at all.
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I'm the worst mom.
I'm gonna be terrible.
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No. Don't say that.
145
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What if I screw this up?
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You won't. Studies show your maternal
instincts really kick in in the last month.
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I know. I'm sorry. I'm just nervous.
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- It's fine. I love you so much. Okay?
- I love you too.
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[DOORBELL RINGS]
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ISAAC:
Bets, look who it is.
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Ethan!
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Merry Christmas.
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Oh, my God! You look so big!
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- No.
- No?
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You don't know
a lot of pregnant women, do you?
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- I meant the baby.
- No, I look really big.
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You look great,
and the baby's probably cramped...
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- ...inside of your small, fit body.
- Thank you. No, that's enough.
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- Just shut up. It's all good. It's fine.
- I'm so sorry. I don't know what to say.
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She looks beautiful.
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- You want a drink?
- Sure.
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- Do you want a drink, honey?
- I'm okay right now.
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Really?
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Yeah. I'm kind of on call.
Gotta keep my head on straight.
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- But you're gonna drink tonight?
- Yeah. For sure.
166
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- Because I'm already kind of drunk.
- I can tell.
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[DOORBELL RINGS]
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- That's Chris.
- Yeah.
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Everybody, look who it is!
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Merry Christmas, blessed Kwanzaa,
happy Hanukkah!
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ISAAC:
Hey, man. How's it going?
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Whoa! Look at this! Oh, my God!
173
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I couldn't even tell you were pregnant
till I saw you from the side.
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Look how tiny you are!
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That's so nice of you to say.
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That is how you talk
to a pregnant woman.
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It's amazing. You've had the season
of a lifetime. Congratulations, man.
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- Congrats.
- Thanks, man.
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Got a new workout, new diet,
new paleo thing I've been doing.
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I've heard about that. And it works?
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It rips you up. If you see me naked,
it'll blow your mind.
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I'd love to.
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♪ Five golden rings ♪
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Kick ass.
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♪ Four calling birds ♪
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♪ Three French hens ♪
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♪ Two turtle doves ♪
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♪ And a partridge in a pear tree ♪
189
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Really can't believe
we're doing this again this year.
190
00:08:43,774 --> 00:08:45,943
I was done a few years ago,
to be totally honest.
191
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We're like those kids
who won't stop trick-or-treating.
192
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Eventually, they come to your door,
you're like, "Eh."
193
00:08:50,072 --> 00:08:51,365
- "No candy for you."
- No.
194
00:08:51,532 --> 00:08:52,909
"Pack it in, kid."
195
00:08:53,075 --> 00:08:55,828
- But this is it. This is the last Christmas.
- Last time. Right?
196
00:08:55,995 --> 00:08:57,595
- Is he cool with it?
- Yeah, I think so.
197
00:08:57,705 --> 00:08:58,985
He looks happy right now, right?
198
00:08:59,040 --> 00:09:01,292
I'm just saying,
we're enabling him at this point.
199
00:09:01,459 --> 00:09:03,836
We're not helping him
get over his own problems.
200
00:09:04,003 --> 00:09:06,005
On a psychological level,
that's not good.
201
00:09:06,172 --> 00:09:07,252
CHRIS:
I've made a decision.
202
00:09:07,381 --> 00:09:09,675
For a Christmas present tonight,
I'm gonna take him under my wing.
203
00:09:09,842 --> 00:09:11,682
I'm gonna help him
and get him out of this rut.
204
00:09:11,802 --> 00:09:13,346
It's a conversation we've been avoiding
for 10 years, actually.
205
00:09:13,512 --> 00:09:14,513
I know.
206
00:09:14,680 --> 00:09:16,182
Just do it easy.
207
00:09:16,349 --> 00:09:17,683
I'm going all in.
208
00:09:17,850 --> 00:09:19,560
- Don't go all in.
- Balls and all.
209
00:09:19,727 --> 00:09:24,273
♪ And a partridge in a pear tree ♪
210
00:09:25,983 --> 00:09:27,318
♪ On the eighth... ♪♪
211
00:09:27,485 --> 00:09:28,486
BETSY:
Have fun.
212
00:09:28,653 --> 00:09:30,529
Take good care of my husband, all right?
I like him.
213
00:09:30,696 --> 00:09:31,948
CHRIS:
We will.
214
00:09:32,114 --> 00:09:34,283
Hey, Bets, tell Diana I said hello.
215
00:09:34,450 --> 00:09:35,576
Yeah, no.
216
00:09:35,743 --> 00:09:37,662
- No, no. Merry Christmas.
BETSY: Mwah.
217
00:09:37,828 --> 00:09:39,163
Bye-bye.
218
00:09:39,330 --> 00:09:41,040
- Congratulations.
BETSY: Mwah. Good to see you.
219
00:09:41,207 --> 00:09:43,417
CHRIS: Luckiest guy in the Park.
- I sure am. Bye.
220
00:09:43,584 --> 00:09:44,627
Can I talk to you for a second
real quick?
221
00:09:44,794 --> 00:09:46,629
What? We're not doing gifts now,
are we?
222
00:09:46,796 --> 00:09:50,716
No, we're doing them tomorrow, but
this one I'm pretty sure you'll want tonight.
223
00:09:50,967 --> 00:09:53,552
- What is it?
- You have been such a rock...
224
00:09:53,719 --> 00:09:55,680
...throughout this whole pregnancy.
225
00:09:55,846 --> 00:09:57,348
You're like my Dwayne Johnson.
226
00:09:57,515 --> 00:09:58,516
Thank you.
227
00:09:58,683 --> 00:10:00,810
It's Christmas now,
and we've almost made it...
228
00:10:00,977 --> 00:10:03,104
...and you deserve this.
So Merry Christmas.
229
00:10:03,271 --> 00:10:04,355
Is it cologne?
230
00:10:04,522 --> 00:10:05,940
No.
231
00:10:09,151 --> 00:10:11,779
Holy shit!
232
00:10:11,946 --> 00:10:14,073
BETSY:
It's every single drug in the whole world.
233
00:10:14,865 --> 00:10:16,367
Why are you giving this to me?
234
00:10:16,534 --> 00:10:18,369
You've been so focused
on me and the baby...
235
00:10:18,536 --> 00:10:20,776
...and tonight I think
you should just focus on yourself.
236
00:10:20,830 --> 00:10:23,708
Go out there,
get fucking wild, you know?
237
00:10:23,874 --> 00:10:26,877
Is this cocaine? I haven't done cocaine
for 11 years, I don't think.
238
00:10:27,044 --> 00:10:28,254
No one has, I don't think.
239
00:10:28,421 --> 00:10:30,131
That's amazing.
Where did you get all this shit?
240
00:10:30,298 --> 00:10:31,978
- Craigslist.
- You got it from Craigslist?
241
00:10:32,091 --> 00:10:34,010
I just typed in the search "NYC drugs."
242
00:10:34,176 --> 00:10:35,636
Really resourceful of you.
243
00:10:35,803 --> 00:10:38,431
It's your last Christmas together,
so have fun. Enjoy it.
244
00:10:38,597 --> 00:10:40,683
- Thank you so much.
- Yeah. I love you.
245
00:10:40,850 --> 00:10:42,810
This is so great.
I'll have my phone with me.
246
00:10:42,977 --> 00:10:46,105
I'll be home pretty early, I think.
Okay. I love you.
247
00:10:46,439 --> 00:10:47,857
[♪♪♪]
248
00:10:48,733 --> 00:10:49,859
ETHAN:
What?
249
00:10:50,484 --> 00:10:51,944
What the fuck is this?
250
00:10:52,111 --> 00:10:53,911
CHRIS:
This is the Red Bull Limousine, fellas.
251
00:10:54,363 --> 00:10:57,700
You are now looking at the face
and body of Red Bull.
252
00:10:57,867 --> 00:10:59,707
- Wow! Congratulations, man!
CHRIS: Huh? Right?
253
00:11:00,119 --> 00:11:03,039
Since this is our final Christmas,
I figured we could do it in class.
254
00:11:03,205 --> 00:11:05,416
Seriously, this is what the spirit
of Christmas is all about.
255
00:11:05,583 --> 00:11:08,423
A rich athlete finally getting
the corporate limo that he always wanted.
256
00:11:08,502 --> 00:11:10,171
- Exactly!
- I think so.
257
00:11:10,338 --> 00:11:12,138
Let's go, get in.
You gotta see this. Come on.
258
00:11:12,173 --> 00:11:13,674
Cool!
259
00:11:14,425 --> 00:11:16,761
CHRIS:
Yo, it's the Red Bull Limo, guys!
260
00:11:17,678 --> 00:11:18,679
All right.
261
00:11:18,846 --> 00:11:21,223
Yo! What's up, everybody?
This your man, C-Rob.
262
00:11:21,390 --> 00:11:22,767
We in the Red Bull Limo.
263
00:11:22,933 --> 00:11:26,520
And we Dom P'in it, we have Cristal in it,
Hennythuggin' it...
264
00:11:26,687 --> 00:11:28,647
...and we got Red Bull!
265
00:11:28,814 --> 00:11:32,818
I'm capturing this
on my Sony Xperia Ultra phone.
266
00:11:32,985 --> 00:11:35,225
No matter what the light,
the picture's right. All right?
267
00:11:35,279 --> 00:11:36,989
This your man, Chris Rob,
coming at you.
268
00:11:37,156 --> 00:11:38,657
What happening? Peace!
269
00:11:38,824 --> 00:11:40,659
CHRIS & ETHAN: Peace!
- Wow.
270
00:11:41,285 --> 00:11:42,620
And Internet.
271
00:11:42,787 --> 00:11:45,289
- His social media game is crazy.
CHRIS: On point.
272
00:11:45,456 --> 00:11:46,540
ISAAC: Really on point, yeah.
CHRIS: On point.
273
00:11:46,707 --> 00:11:48,876
ISAAC: Five million people
probably just saw that.
274
00:11:49,418 --> 00:11:50,419
Hey there.
275
00:11:50,586 --> 00:11:54,048
Didn't wanna interrupt
while you guys were rolling back there.
276
00:11:54,215 --> 00:11:55,633
Great video, by the way.
I just watched it.
277
00:11:55,800 --> 00:11:56,842
That was fast.
278
00:11:57,009 --> 00:12:00,679
My name's Joshua. I'm gonna be your
Red Bull-provided driver for the evening.
279
00:12:00,846 --> 00:12:02,056
First stop: Rockefeller Center, right?
280
00:12:02,223 --> 00:12:03,891
CHRIS: Great, thank you, Josh.
- Raise partition.
281
00:12:04,058 --> 00:12:05,059
Nice meeting you, Josh.
282
00:12:05,226 --> 00:12:07,353
I'm doing the hang-loose thing
too much.
283
00:12:07,520 --> 00:12:09,647
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
We'll call you. There we go.
284
00:12:09,814 --> 00:12:11,190
Check out what Betsy gave me.
285
00:12:11,357 --> 00:12:13,484
It's a bunch of drugs.
We eat a little 'shrooms...
286
00:12:13,984 --> 00:12:17,196
...to kind of trip out a little bit,
look at the lights, all the sparkly lights.
287
00:12:17,363 --> 00:12:18,364
Let's start with the champagne.
288
00:12:18,531 --> 00:12:20,658
Yeah, sure, yeah. Yeah!
289
00:12:22,284 --> 00:12:25,121
Aim it out the window,
aim it out the window! Oh!
290
00:12:25,704 --> 00:12:28,332
♪ You know you wanna get down ♪
291
00:12:30,793 --> 00:12:32,920
♪ Get on down ♪♪
292
00:12:33,671 --> 00:12:35,756
- So, what's up, E? How's life, man?
- Life is good!
293
00:12:35,923 --> 00:12:36,924
- Yeah?
- Yeah, dude.
294
00:12:37,091 --> 00:12:39,427
How's the music going?
Any gigs coming up?
295
00:12:39,593 --> 00:12:41,679
Not gigs, but gigs are overrated, dude.
296
00:12:41,846 --> 00:12:43,472
People are just on their phones
the whole time.
297
00:12:43,639 --> 00:12:44,640
- You know what I mean?
- Totally, yeah.
298
00:12:44,807 --> 00:12:45,808
The thing I'm working on now...
299
00:12:45,975 --> 00:12:48,144
...you really have to listen to it
start to finish. It's a concept album.
300
00:12:48,310 --> 00:12:49,478
What's the concept?
301
00:12:49,645 --> 00:12:51,981
I'm still conceptualizing
that part of it...
302
00:12:52,148 --> 00:12:53,190
...but it's all about who you know...
WOMAN: C-Rob, will you sign this?
303
00:12:53,357 --> 00:12:54,358
- ...more than anything.
- Wait up, wait up.
304
00:12:54,525 --> 00:12:55,693
How's it going? Hey, merry Christmas.
305
00:12:55,860 --> 00:12:57,653
ISAAC: Photobomb!
- There you go. All right.
306
00:12:57,820 --> 00:12:59,029
That just happens now?
307
00:12:59,196 --> 00:13:00,698
CHRIS: People love C-Rob.
- Wow.
308
00:13:00,865 --> 00:13:02,950
So how about Diana?
You talk to her?
309
00:13:03,117 --> 00:13:04,277
How's things going with that?
310
00:13:04,410 --> 00:13:05,494
Hate to see that one get away,
you know?
311
00:13:05,661 --> 00:13:07,246
- It's still over.
- It's over. Don't worry about it.
312
00:13:07,413 --> 00:13:10,708
But it's okay. It's no one's fault, really.
We just drifted apart.
313
00:13:10,875 --> 00:13:13,127
Look, we're at the tree!
Why don't we talk about it another time?
314
00:13:13,294 --> 00:13:15,171
- What?
- Not now, man.
315
00:13:19,633 --> 00:13:21,051
CHRIS:
Wow.
316
00:13:21,260 --> 00:13:22,887
Gentlemen...
317
00:13:23,429 --> 00:13:27,475
...14 years ago to this very night,
a tradition was born.
318
00:13:27,641 --> 00:13:31,270
That year some drunk, fucking asshole
hit my parents with a car.
319
00:13:31,437 --> 00:13:34,356
So that Christmas,
I didn't have any family to be with...
320
00:13:34,523 --> 00:13:36,400
...but you guys were there for me.
321
00:13:36,567 --> 00:13:38,110
But tonight!
322
00:13:38,277 --> 00:13:39,403
Tonight's different.
323
00:13:39,570 --> 00:13:42,531
We have mutually decided
to end this tradition.
324
00:13:42,698 --> 00:13:43,991
Isaac's about to have a baby.
325
00:13:44,158 --> 00:13:47,578
And Chris is just too fucking famous
to hang out with us anymore.
326
00:13:47,745 --> 00:13:49,497
But, guys, earlier today...
327
00:13:49,663 --> 00:13:53,501
...I witnessed
a real-life Christmas miracle.
328
00:13:53,918 --> 00:13:55,920
- Where the fuck did you get those?
- Holy shit! Are those real?
329
00:13:56,086 --> 00:13:57,296
They are fucking real!
330
00:13:57,463 --> 00:13:58,464
ISAAC:
Where did they come from?
331
00:13:58,631 --> 00:14:00,216
It doesn't matter!
It's a fucking Christmas miracle!
332
00:14:00,382 --> 00:14:02,134
CHRIS:
You killed somebody for those?
333
00:14:02,301 --> 00:14:03,677
No, I stole them.
334
00:14:03,844 --> 00:14:05,554
ISAAC:
That's awesome! What a blowout!
335
00:14:05,721 --> 00:14:08,682
It is the Nutcracker Ball!
336
00:14:08,849 --> 00:14:10,100
ISAAC:
Yes!
337
00:14:10,267 --> 00:14:12,645
So I called the number on these tickets.
338
00:14:12,811 --> 00:14:15,105
They don't give out the address till 10.
339
00:14:15,272 --> 00:14:19,318
So that gives us several hours to hit
as many Christmas traditions as possible!
340
00:14:19,485 --> 00:14:20,486
CHRIS:
Let's do it.
341
00:14:20,653 --> 00:14:22,655
ETHAN: And it's gonna be the
best fucking night of our lives!
342
00:14:22,821 --> 00:14:24,406
I'm so psyched, man. Awesome.
343
00:14:24,573 --> 00:14:26,742
Maybe it'll be
the new Christmas tradition.
344
00:14:28,827 --> 00:14:32,373
I don't know if we're really
replacing this with another tradition.
345
00:14:32,540 --> 00:14:34,458
That was a joke, Isaac.
Give me some credit.
346
00:14:34,625 --> 00:14:36,919
Obviously, that was a joke.
I am totally cool with it.
347
00:14:37,086 --> 00:14:38,379
Obviously, he's joking.
348
00:14:38,546 --> 00:14:41,173
- Definitely.
- Gentlemen, I got the sweaters.
349
00:14:41,340 --> 00:14:42,341
This one's for you.
350
00:14:42,508 --> 00:14:43,884
- This is for you.
- Nice.
351
00:14:44,051 --> 00:14:45,052
Let's do this!
352
00:14:45,219 --> 00:14:46,929
ISAAC: Let's do it. Hey, where'd he go?
CHRIS: Ha, ha, ha.
353
00:14:47,263 --> 00:14:48,556
[♪♪♪]
354
00:15:03,487 --> 00:15:05,489
[PLAYING NOTES]
355
00:15:07,700 --> 00:15:10,411
[PLAYING NOTES]
356
00:15:27,052 --> 00:15:28,762
♪ We got ya, we got ya, we got ya ♪
357
00:15:28,929 --> 00:15:30,889
♪ We got ya, we got ya, we got ya ♪
358
00:15:31,056 --> 00:15:32,933
♪ We got ya, we got ya, we got ya ♪
359
00:15:33,100 --> 00:15:35,019
♪ We got ya, we got ya, we got ya ♪
360
00:15:36,186 --> 00:15:40,107
♪ And I always find
Yeah, I always find something wrong ♪
361
00:15:42,234 --> 00:15:45,321
♪ You been putting up with my shit
Just way too long ♪
362
00:15:47,156 --> 00:15:51,410
♪ I'm so gifted at finding
What I don't like the most ♪
363
00:15:52,870 --> 00:15:56,832
♪ So I think it's time
For us to have a toast ♪
364
00:15:57,541 --> 00:15:59,141
♪ Let's have a toast
For the douchebags ♪
365
00:15:59,627 --> 00:16:02,296
♪ Let's have a toast
For the assholes ♪
366
00:16:02,504 --> 00:16:05,007
♪ Let's have a toast
For the scumbags ♪
367
00:16:05,257 --> 00:16:07,801
♪ Every one of them that I know ♪
368
00:16:08,010 --> 00:16:10,512
♪ Let's have a toast
For the jerk-offs ♪
369
00:16:10,804 --> 00:16:13,349
♪ That'll never take work off ♪
370
00:16:13,557 --> 00:16:15,809
♪ Baby, I got a plan ♪
371
00:16:16,018 --> 00:16:18,562
♪ Run away as fast as you can ♪
372
00:16:18,771 --> 00:16:21,148
♪ Run away as fast as you can ♪♪
373
00:16:24,318 --> 00:16:25,527
- Soup's on!
CHRIS: Yay.
374
00:16:25,694 --> 00:16:27,738
Hey, Thuwan! How's it going, my man?
375
00:16:27,905 --> 00:16:30,824
ETHAN: Now it's Christmas. It's not
Christmas till we eat egg drop soup.
376
00:16:30,991 --> 00:16:33,118
It brings me back.
Who are you calling right now?
377
00:16:33,285 --> 00:16:35,329
- Calling my man Tommy Owens.
- You're calling Tommy Owens?
378
00:16:35,496 --> 00:16:37,122
- Who's Tommy Owens?
- He's the best player in the league.
379
00:16:37,289 --> 00:16:39,583
- Tommy!
- C-Money, what's up, my man?
380
00:16:39,750 --> 00:16:41,460
Merry Christmas. Heh-heh-heh.
381
00:16:41,627 --> 00:16:43,253
[WHISPERING]
Tell him hi.
382
00:16:43,420 --> 00:16:44,755
[IN NORMAL VOICE]
Hennessy.
383
00:16:44,922 --> 00:16:46,465
We going to the Nutcracker Ball.
I got tickets for my boys.
384
00:16:46,632 --> 00:16:48,217
I got us on the list for the party...
385
00:16:48,384 --> 00:16:50,135
...the after-party, the before-party,
every party.
386
00:16:50,302 --> 00:16:51,887
Congrats, baby, you coming up big time.
387
00:16:52,054 --> 00:16:54,014
What we do, baby. That's what we do!
388
00:16:54,181 --> 00:16:55,307
Tell him to bring some green with him.
389
00:16:55,474 --> 00:16:57,726
Oh. Hey, yo, C-Money,
while I got you on the phone...
390
00:16:57,893 --> 00:17:00,187
...I hate to even ask, but you think
maybe you could bring us some weed?
391
00:17:00,354 --> 00:17:02,773
Yeah, I can get weed.
Look who you're talking to, baby.
392
00:17:02,940 --> 00:17:05,442
- Come on. It's Chris Money.
- Smoke it up!
393
00:17:05,609 --> 00:17:07,778
I'll see you at the Nutcracker Ball.
I'll bring you a half a pound...
394
00:17:07,945 --> 00:17:09,029
...and we gonna roll. Much love.
395
00:17:09,196 --> 00:17:10,989
One. Chris love out. Peace.
396
00:17:13,117 --> 00:17:14,535
How much weed you got in that box?
397
00:17:14,702 --> 00:17:16,036
I don't know. Why don't we check?
398
00:17:16,203 --> 00:17:17,371
Check it out, playa.
399
00:17:17,538 --> 00:17:22,418
Someone call Snoop D-O-double
gezzank, because I got the reefers.
400
00:17:22,584 --> 00:17:23,961
You have one joint?
401
00:17:24,128 --> 00:17:26,880
She doesn't know that much about drugs.
The proportions of this shit is all off.
402
00:17:27,047 --> 00:17:28,632
Dude, we need to get some weed.
403
00:17:28,799 --> 00:17:30,634
Can we just not get derailed here?
404
00:17:30,801 --> 00:17:32,803
This is not about
some famous athlete and his weed.
405
00:17:32,970 --> 00:17:35,180
This is about the three of us.
This is our last Christmas together.
406
00:17:35,347 --> 00:17:36,987
It is about a famous athlete
and his weed.
407
00:17:37,015 --> 00:17:39,935
I've been on this dude's team for six
years and he finally knows who I am.
408
00:17:40,102 --> 00:17:41,262
If I can deliver this weed...
409
00:17:41,395 --> 00:17:44,148
...we could smoke with Tommy Owens
and hang with him all night!
410
00:17:44,314 --> 00:17:45,524
I'd love to smoke weed
with Tommy Owens.
411
00:17:45,691 --> 00:17:47,291
See? He wants to
smoke with Tommy, right?
412
00:17:47,401 --> 00:17:48,652
Okay. Okay.
413
00:17:48,819 --> 00:17:51,196
- Where do we get some weed from?
- Uh...
414
00:17:51,363 --> 00:17:53,490
We could call Mr. Green.
415
00:17:53,657 --> 00:17:55,743
ISAAC: Why are we outside
our high school again?
416
00:17:55,909 --> 00:17:58,429
ETHAN: Because he's a fucking
drug-dealer and he's suspicious...
417
00:17:58,454 --> 00:18:01,039
...and he doesn't meet you
unless he's met you there before.
418
00:18:01,206 --> 00:18:03,375
So it's either our old high school
or this guy's mom's house.
419
00:18:03,542 --> 00:18:04,543
That's not happening.
420
00:18:04,710 --> 00:18:06,128
I know. So it's here.
421
00:18:06,336 --> 00:18:07,671
[PHONE RINGING]
422
00:18:07,880 --> 00:18:09,173
Shit. Is that you?
423
00:18:09,339 --> 00:18:11,049
It's not mine.
424
00:18:11,216 --> 00:18:13,051
- No.
- Oh, shit.
425
00:18:13,218 --> 00:18:14,553
[PHONE CONTINUES RINGING]
426
00:18:14,720 --> 00:18:16,054
ETHAN:
That was there before.
427
00:18:16,221 --> 00:18:17,723
CHRIS: Do they even
make payphones anymore?
428
00:18:17,890 --> 00:18:19,141
ISAAC: Don't touch it.
People wipe their butts on those.
429
00:18:19,308 --> 00:18:20,684
ETHAN:
This is how you gotta talk to him.
430
00:18:20,851 --> 00:18:21,894
CHRIS:
Don't pick up! Oh!
431
00:18:22,060 --> 00:18:23,437
Hello! 1998 speaking.
432
00:18:23,604 --> 00:18:24,813
That's gross.
433
00:18:25,355 --> 00:18:26,815
Oh.
434
00:18:27,024 --> 00:18:29,610
Yeah, I see you. Okay. Thanks.
He's right there.
435
00:18:29,818 --> 00:18:31,069
[HORN HONKING]
436
00:18:31,278 --> 00:18:32,488
Go ahead. Go get the weed.
437
00:18:32,821 --> 00:18:33,941
I'm not going. You're going.
438
00:18:33,989 --> 00:18:36,450
- Just get it. Come on, don't be a baby.
- It's your weed!
439
00:18:36,617 --> 00:18:37,993
Shit.
440
00:18:40,287 --> 00:18:43,999
Is it just me?
He's changed a little bit, right?
441
00:18:44,208 --> 00:18:47,628
Uh, yeah, he seems like
he's excited about his fame.
442
00:18:47,795 --> 00:18:50,172
I think it's our job to sort of
just keep him in check.
443
00:18:50,631 --> 00:18:53,300
Sometimes, you think it's easy
to tell your friend something...
444
00:18:53,467 --> 00:18:55,636
...and it's actually hard
to tell them that thing...
445
00:18:55,803 --> 00:18:57,054
...once you're confronted
with the actual moment...
446
00:18:57,221 --> 00:18:58,388
...that you would maybe tell them
that thing.
447
00:18:58,555 --> 00:18:59,556
You know what I mean?
448
00:19:05,312 --> 00:19:07,940
Mr. Green! What's up, man?
449
00:19:08,106 --> 00:19:09,733
Good evening.
450
00:19:09,900 --> 00:19:11,527
How you doing?
It's good to see you.
451
00:19:11,693 --> 00:19:13,153
I'm glad you open on Christmas.
Whoo.
452
00:19:13,320 --> 00:19:15,864
A lot of people need me
on Christmas, you know.
453
00:19:16,615 --> 00:19:18,617
It's a tough holiday.
454
00:19:19,117 --> 00:19:20,160
I know you.
455
00:19:20,327 --> 00:19:21,537
Yeah.
456
00:19:21,703 --> 00:19:23,872
You used to sell weed to me and
my friends when we were in high school.
457
00:19:24,039 --> 00:19:25,165
Yeah, that's crazy.
458
00:19:25,332 --> 00:19:27,501
So, what do you want?
459
00:19:27,668 --> 00:19:30,712
Your best shit, man.
That chronic, that drow, that...
460
00:19:30,879 --> 00:19:32,548
Yeah, yeah! Some of that.
461
00:19:32,714 --> 00:19:36,009
It's good to see you kids
still hanging out and smoking up.
462
00:19:36,176 --> 00:19:37,469
Makes me proud.
463
00:19:37,636 --> 00:19:40,848
Thanks, man. We're just kind of trying
to keep the dream alive, you know?
464
00:19:41,014 --> 00:19:43,016
But this is not for us.
This is for a good friend of mine.
465
00:19:43,183 --> 00:19:46,144
Tommy Owens. Quarterback.
The Messiah.
466
00:19:46,311 --> 00:19:48,647
You know what?
As far as I'm concerned...
467
00:19:48,814 --> 00:19:50,148
...there's only one Messiah.
468
00:19:50,315 --> 00:19:53,235
Our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.
469
00:19:54,111 --> 00:19:55,821
So that name's a little blasphemous.
470
00:19:56,321 --> 00:19:57,531
Yeah.
471
00:20:04,872 --> 00:20:07,541
The Weed of Christmas Present.
472
00:20:07,708 --> 00:20:11,628
I'm an athlete, so drug-free body.
Drug-free zone. No smoking.
473
00:20:11,795 --> 00:20:14,339
You buying that for somebody
and you're not gonna test it?
474
00:20:15,215 --> 00:20:16,842
That could be oregano.
475
00:20:17,593 --> 00:20:19,720
- Orega-what?
- Oregano.
476
00:20:28,061 --> 00:20:29,605
[JINGLING]
477
00:20:32,649 --> 00:20:34,109
So...
478
00:20:35,652 --> 00:20:37,362
Something special
supposed to happen?
479
00:20:37,529 --> 00:20:39,031
It just did.
480
00:20:39,197 --> 00:20:41,325
You're in the present.
481
00:20:45,078 --> 00:20:47,748
What? Maybe I'm high
or something, man, I don't...
482
00:20:47,915 --> 00:20:50,000
Or maybe you're in the present.
483
00:20:51,251 --> 00:20:54,671
The Weed of Christmas Present.
484
00:20:54,838 --> 00:20:57,799
Well, with that logic, isn't all weed
the weed of Christmas present?
485
00:20:58,508 --> 00:21:00,636
Only on Christmas, kid.
486
00:21:02,596 --> 00:21:04,514
Anyway, that'll be a hundred bucks.
487
00:21:05,015 --> 00:21:08,060
Oh. All right. I'll get your hundreds.
488
00:21:08,226 --> 00:21:11,063
If you guys ain't doing nothing later,
you should stop by this party I'm throwing.
489
00:21:11,229 --> 00:21:13,190
It's a hell of a bash.
490
00:21:13,398 --> 00:21:15,275
Heh-heh. You serious?
491
00:21:15,442 --> 00:21:17,194
It's not in my car.
492
00:21:17,569 --> 00:21:18,904
It's a real party.
493
00:21:19,613 --> 00:21:23,408
Uh, we already got invited to something.
Sorry. But thank you for the invite.
494
00:21:23,575 --> 00:21:26,828
That's no problem.
My feelings aren't hurt. Not really.
495
00:21:30,707 --> 00:21:32,501
Tell Isaac,
"I'll see you in a couple hours."
496
00:21:32,668 --> 00:21:33,835
What?
497
00:21:34,002 --> 00:21:37,673
Tell Isaac I'll see him in a couple hours.
498
00:21:37,839 --> 00:21:40,300
How did he get so good
all of a sudden?
499
00:21:40,467 --> 00:21:41,885
I don't know.
500
00:21:42,052 --> 00:21:44,346
Oh. Here we go. Here we go.
501
00:21:47,432 --> 00:21:49,601
That shit was the weirdest
fucking experience of my life, dude.
502
00:21:49,768 --> 00:21:51,561
- Really?
- But I got the weed.
503
00:21:51,728 --> 00:21:52,938
Nice.
504
00:21:53,105 --> 00:21:54,773
Come on, let's go
tear this fucking karaoke down.
505
00:21:54,940 --> 00:21:57,150
Let them bitches know
the Ice Crew in the building!
506
00:21:57,317 --> 00:21:58,819
Let's do it, baby.
507
00:21:58,986 --> 00:22:00,988
- Did you practice the moves?
ISAAC: Oh, I've been practicing.
508
00:22:01,154 --> 00:22:02,614
Hey!
509
00:22:02,823 --> 00:22:04,199
[HIP-HOP SONG PLAYING]
510
00:22:05,492 --> 00:22:08,036
Whoa. Happy feet, happy feet.
511
00:22:12,207 --> 00:22:15,127
Show them, huh! Unh! Unh! Unh!
512
00:22:15,293 --> 00:22:17,504
[RAPPING] ♪ It's Christmas time
In Hollis, Queens ♪
513
00:22:17,671 --> 00:22:20,549
♪ Mom's cooking chicken
And collard greens ♪
514
00:22:20,716 --> 00:22:22,592
♪ Rice and stuffing
Macaroni and cheese ♪
515
00:22:22,759 --> 00:22:25,303
♪ And Santa's putting toys
Under Christmas trees ♪
516
00:22:25,470 --> 00:22:27,889
♪ Decorate the house
With lights at night ♪
517
00:22:28,056 --> 00:22:30,100
♪ Snow on the ground
Snow white so bright ♪
518
00:22:30,308 --> 00:22:32,728
♪ In the fireplace is the yule log ♪
519
00:22:32,894 --> 00:22:35,313
♪ Beneath the mistletoe
Is where we're drinkin' eggnog ♪
520
00:22:35,480 --> 00:22:37,983
♪ The rhymes that you hear
Are the rhymes of Darryl's ♪
521
00:22:38,150 --> 00:22:41,403
♪ But each and every year
We bust Christmas carols ♪
522
00:22:41,611 --> 00:22:42,696
[ALL CHEERING]
523
00:22:44,656 --> 00:22:46,533
Got my prenup.
524
00:22:53,623 --> 00:22:55,625
I think the 'shrooms are kicking in.
525
00:22:55,792 --> 00:22:58,045
♪ My name's DMC
With the mic in my hand ♪
526
00:22:58,211 --> 00:23:00,589
♪ I'm chilling and cooling
Like a snowman ♪
527
00:23:00,756 --> 00:23:03,425
♪ So open your eyes, lend us an ear
We want to say ♪
528
00:23:03,592 --> 00:23:05,927
♪ Merry Christmas
And a Happy New Year ♪
529
00:23:06,636 --> 00:23:08,055
[ALL CHEERING]
530
00:23:09,222 --> 00:23:11,308
Yo, what's up? We're the Ice Crew!
531
00:23:11,475 --> 00:23:13,143
We just got one thing to say!
532
00:23:13,310 --> 00:23:15,479
Drink some damn Red Bull. Hell, yeah!
533
00:23:15,687 --> 00:23:17,898
[ALL CHEERING]
534
00:23:20,484 --> 00:23:21,568
It's happening.
535
00:23:21,735 --> 00:23:23,111
ETHAN: You feel good?
- Yeah.
536
00:23:23,278 --> 00:23:25,113
Ethan, it's Diana!
537
00:23:25,280 --> 00:23:26,698
DIANA: Hi.
CHRIS: What's up?
538
00:23:26,865 --> 00:23:29,326
Chris, I wanna say hi to you,
but you're surrounded by fans!
539
00:23:29,493 --> 00:23:31,495
I know. It's crazy! Say hey to Ethan!
540
00:23:31,661 --> 00:23:32,746
He looks really great!
541
00:23:32,913 --> 00:23:35,624
Let's go outside and Instagram.
My social media game is on point!
542
00:23:35,791 --> 00:23:37,667
- That guy's really famous now.
ETHAN: Yeah.
543
00:23:37,834 --> 00:23:38,919
Super famous.
544
00:23:39,086 --> 00:23:40,879
- So good seeing you guys!
DIANA: Hey!
545
00:23:41,338 --> 00:23:43,173
Merry Christmas.
What are you guys doing here?
546
00:23:43,340 --> 00:23:45,967
It's the only karaoke place
that's open on Christmas.
547
00:23:46,134 --> 00:23:47,803
Yeah, it's our tradition.
548
00:23:47,969 --> 00:23:49,638
I should've remembered
that you guys come here.
549
00:23:49,805 --> 00:23:51,056
But Run-DMC,
I got to see it! Finally.
550
00:23:51,223 --> 00:23:52,766
- You liked it?
DIANA: It was awesome.
551
00:23:52,933 --> 00:23:54,309
This is what you guys missed.
552
00:23:54,476 --> 00:23:55,644
She did Miley Cyrus.
553
00:23:55,811 --> 00:23:57,729
She destroyed Wrecking Ball.
It was amazing.
554
00:23:57,896 --> 00:23:59,773
- You still like that song.
- Everybody does.
555
00:23:59,940 --> 00:24:03,235
You can cry to it. You can run to it.
You can party to it.
556
00:24:03,401 --> 00:24:06,154
- Timeless!
- What are you guys doing?
557
00:24:06,321 --> 00:24:08,365
We're having
a really fun night, actually.
558
00:24:08,532 --> 00:24:10,492
We're kind of going not too hard,
but pretty hard.
559
00:24:10,617 --> 00:24:11,743
We're kind of just...
560
00:24:11,910 --> 00:24:13,161
It's our last night
doing the Christmas!
561
00:24:13,328 --> 00:24:16,790
ETHAN: End of an era.
- Last year. Last year.
562
00:24:17,332 --> 00:24:19,042
But it's been really fun, though.
563
00:24:19,209 --> 00:24:20,961
Of course.
Betsy's giving birth in a month.
564
00:24:21,128 --> 00:24:22,921
She's having a baby, yeah.
565
00:24:23,088 --> 00:24:24,506
We're gonna miss her at the office.
566
00:24:24,673 --> 00:24:25,924
But she said that you've been
doing a very good job.
567
00:24:26,091 --> 00:24:27,634
That you're so prepared.
568
00:24:27,801 --> 00:24:30,804
You've read every single book
on being a dad since books were created.
569
00:24:30,971 --> 00:24:32,848
SARAH:
I would be losing my shit right now.
570
00:24:33,014 --> 00:24:35,183
That you're prepared,
like over-prepared.
571
00:24:35,350 --> 00:24:36,643
ETHAN:
He's solid. He's got the stats.
572
00:24:36,810 --> 00:24:39,104
A lot of men in your position
fucking freak out.
573
00:24:39,271 --> 00:24:40,897
DIANA: They just leave.
SARAH: And they take off.
574
00:24:41,064 --> 00:24:44,025
- It's an epidemic.
- It's true. Are you guys...
575
00:24:44,192 --> 00:24:46,778
What the fuck! Are you guys okay?
Are you okay?
576
00:24:46,945 --> 00:24:50,073
The lights in here
fucking with you guys? Like a lot.
577
00:24:50,240 --> 00:24:51,283
SARAH:
Not really.
578
00:24:51,449 --> 00:24:53,577
I think moving around, maybe,
from the dancing.
579
00:24:53,743 --> 00:24:56,163
- Yeah.
- I'm gonna call Betsy. I'll be right back.
580
00:24:56,329 --> 00:24:59,332
It's good to see you.
I'll be... I'll be... I'll be...
581
00:24:59,499 --> 00:25:00,625
ETHAN:
Give her a call.
582
00:25:02,127 --> 00:25:03,670
You guys have a nice connection.
583
00:25:03,837 --> 00:25:06,256
Yeah, he's a sweetheart.
584
00:25:08,216 --> 00:25:10,427
- I'm gonna go to the bar, get more to drink.
- DIANA: No. No, no.
585
00:25:10,594 --> 00:25:12,304
- Nice to see you.
ETHAN: Merry Christmas.
586
00:25:12,470 --> 00:25:13,555
You look good.
587
00:25:14,389 --> 00:25:15,557
[DIANA CHUCKLES]
588
00:25:15,765 --> 00:25:16,975
Hi.
589
00:25:17,142 --> 00:25:18,518
Hi. Heh, heh.
590
00:25:20,187 --> 00:25:21,313
[BREATHING HEAVILY]
591
00:25:24,274 --> 00:25:25,442
Okay.
592
00:25:25,609 --> 00:25:26,985
Come on. Whoo!
593
00:25:27,152 --> 00:25:29,196
The 'shrooms are turning.
You got a big night ahead of you.
594
00:25:29,362 --> 00:25:30,655
Let's get something else going here.
595
00:25:30,822 --> 00:25:32,782
Cocaine. That'll straighten me out.
596
00:25:32,949 --> 00:25:35,577
Get in my brain.
Make me feel different.
597
00:25:35,785 --> 00:25:36,786
Yeah.
598
00:25:36,995 --> 00:25:38,121
[SNORTS]
599
00:25:38,788 --> 00:25:40,957
[GRUNTING]
600
00:25:41,166 --> 00:25:44,377
What's up, Messiah?
How you doing, White Jesus? Ha, ha, ha.
601
00:25:44,586 --> 00:25:46,421
Yo, check it out. It's C-Rob, man.
602
00:25:46,588 --> 00:25:49,633
So everything's good. I got you.
603
00:25:49,799 --> 00:25:52,719
I got the shit. I got the weed.
I got the smoke.
604
00:25:52,886 --> 00:25:56,348
You know what? I'm tripping.
I'm gonna just text you, all right?
605
00:25:56,514 --> 00:25:59,184
What happened to peace?
Peace. C-Rob out.
606
00:25:59,351 --> 00:26:02,145
Chris motherfucking Roberts.
607
00:26:02,812 --> 00:26:04,814
- Well, I'm not Julia Roberts.
- Ha-ha-ha.
608
00:26:04,981 --> 00:26:06,775
- But you are a pretty woman.
- Ha-ha-ha.
609
00:26:07,275 --> 00:26:08,652
Oh, shit! Boom.
610
00:26:08,818 --> 00:26:10,695
Dude, I am such a fan.
611
00:26:11,071 --> 00:26:12,155
Meeting you here tonight...
612
00:26:12,322 --> 00:26:14,950
...this is enough to make Christmas
tolerable for me.
613
00:26:15,158 --> 00:26:17,035
Whoa. You don't like Christmas?
614
00:26:17,202 --> 00:26:19,663
No. I fucking hate Christmas.
615
00:26:19,829 --> 00:26:22,749
Sorry to be like a Grinch. You're into it.
616
00:26:22,958 --> 00:26:24,960
This is amazing.
617
00:26:25,126 --> 00:26:27,462
As much as I hate Christmas,
that's how much I love you.
618
00:26:27,629 --> 00:26:31,258
- Wow.
- Sorry. Heh. I'm being too much.
619
00:26:31,424 --> 00:26:33,705
I'm jizzing all over you.
I'm getting, like, jizzy. Sorry.
620
00:26:33,802 --> 00:26:36,304
No, no, no. Jizz all over me.
I like that shit.
621
00:26:36,471 --> 00:26:38,807
You probably wanna
go back to your friends.
622
00:26:38,974 --> 00:26:40,475
Fuck my friends.
623
00:26:40,642 --> 00:26:42,560
Friends come and go...
624
00:26:42,727 --> 00:26:44,437
...but fans, that's forever.
625
00:26:44,604 --> 00:26:46,773
- You're naughty.
- I'm very naughty.
626
00:26:46,940 --> 00:26:50,402
I'm gonna teach you a Christmas lesson,
you naughty boy.
627
00:26:50,902 --> 00:26:52,028
Okay.
628
00:26:52,237 --> 00:26:53,405
[GRUNTING]
629
00:26:53,780 --> 00:26:55,782
The truth will set you free.
630
00:26:58,159 --> 00:26:59,786
Hey, yo.
631
00:27:00,161 --> 00:27:02,956
This is a message for future Isaac...
632
00:27:03,123 --> 00:27:05,166
...from current Isaac.
633
00:27:05,333 --> 00:27:07,752
And I have to tell you to listen to me...
634
00:27:07,919 --> 00:27:09,462
...because right now I have clarity.
635
00:27:09,629 --> 00:27:11,798
You should not be having
this fucking baby.
636
00:27:11,965 --> 00:27:13,008
This baby's a mistake.
637
00:27:13,174 --> 00:27:15,593
The baby will ruin your life.
You'll ruin the baby's life!
638
00:27:15,760 --> 00:27:17,679
And then the baby
will fucking murder people!
639
00:27:17,846 --> 00:27:21,182
I don't know what you do at this point,
but get rid of this fucking baby!
640
00:27:21,349 --> 00:27:23,476
Put it in a bag and leave it somewhere!
641
00:27:23,643 --> 00:27:26,646
Put it in a basket
and push it down a fucking river!
642
00:27:26,813 --> 00:27:27,981
Fuck you, baby!
643
00:27:28,148 --> 00:27:30,525
Fuck your baby-fucking little arms...
644
00:27:30,692 --> 00:27:32,819
...and your fucking chubby little
baby-fucking legs!
645
00:27:32,986 --> 00:27:36,114
Fuck you, baby! Fuck you! Cunt!
646
00:27:36,323 --> 00:27:37,741
Argh!
647
00:27:39,075 --> 00:27:40,076
Okay.
648
00:27:41,953 --> 00:27:43,079
Fuck.
649
00:27:43,288 --> 00:27:44,706
[SNORTS]
650
00:27:46,124 --> 00:27:48,001
Have some fun! Yeah!
651
00:27:48,293 --> 00:27:49,294
Let's party!
652
00:27:55,842 --> 00:27:57,635
- Isaac?
- Fuck. Yeah.
653
00:27:57,802 --> 00:27:59,387
Hi, Sarah! Whaddup?
654
00:27:59,554 --> 00:28:00,764
- How's it going?
- All right.
655
00:28:00,930 --> 00:28:01,931
Good. Cool.
656
00:28:02,098 --> 00:28:03,391
What's going on? You good?
657
00:28:03,558 --> 00:28:04,559
You're so sweaty.
658
00:28:04,726 --> 00:28:06,269
It's hot in here. I run hot.
659
00:28:06,436 --> 00:28:07,562
We have this tradition
where we wear sweaters.
660
00:28:07,729 --> 00:28:08,855
I don't always
wear a sweater, obviously.
661
00:28:09,022 --> 00:28:11,191
When I'm inside I'd normally take it off.
I think it would hurt my friends' feelings.
662
00:28:11,358 --> 00:28:13,443
You're talking so fast,
you sound like an auctioneer.
663
00:28:13,610 --> 00:28:15,695
- That's funny. Sold!
- Ha-ha.
664
00:28:15,904 --> 00:28:17,989
- That was kind of scary.
- Sorry. I don't mean to scare you...
665
00:28:18,156 --> 00:28:19,991
- ...by going, "Sold!"
- Oh, my God!
666
00:28:20,158 --> 00:28:22,535
Ha-ha-ha. You shouldn't have said it.
Now it's all I can think about.
667
00:28:22,702 --> 00:28:24,204
- You want a drink?
- Okay. Sure.
668
00:28:24,371 --> 00:28:26,122
Let's have a drink.
I'll be right back.
669
00:28:26,289 --> 00:28:27,290
Thanks, Isaac.
670
00:28:27,457 --> 00:28:29,167
♪ Let's talk about sex ♪
671
00:28:29,793 --> 00:28:30,877
[MUMBLING]
672
00:28:31,086 --> 00:28:32,606
Betsy said
you've been asking about me.
673
00:28:32,754 --> 00:28:35,215
- That's a lie.
- It is. That's a lie. Heh, heh.
674
00:28:35,382 --> 00:28:39,469
Betsy would never in a billion years
say anything even remotely like that.
675
00:28:39,636 --> 00:28:41,262
How's your family?
676
00:28:41,429 --> 00:28:43,431
You're asking about my family.
677
00:28:44,099 --> 00:28:46,684
Sorry, I can't believe it.
Who are you?
678
00:28:46,851 --> 00:28:47,977
I deserve that.
679
00:28:48,144 --> 00:28:50,522
My family, thank you for asking, is fine.
680
00:28:50,688 --> 00:28:53,108
You usually stay with them
on Christmas Eve, no?
681
00:28:53,274 --> 00:28:56,486
Yeah, I'm staying with them,
but I'm going to this thing with Sarah.
682
00:28:56,653 --> 00:28:57,904
What is it?
683
00:28:59,739 --> 00:29:03,368
Okay, she's dating this guy,
and he got us into this party.
684
00:29:03,535 --> 00:29:05,370
And I know you've
always wanted to go to it...
685
00:29:05,537 --> 00:29:07,038
Shit.
Are you going to the Nutcracker Ball?
686
00:29:07,205 --> 00:29:08,456
Yeah. I'm sorry.
687
00:29:08,623 --> 00:29:09,624
We're going too.
688
00:29:09,791 --> 00:29:11,167
- You are?
- Isn't that crazy?
689
00:29:11,334 --> 00:29:13,086
I'm happy for you. Your last Christmas...
690
00:29:13,253 --> 00:29:15,338
...and you get to go to the big dumb party
you've always wanted to go to.
691
00:29:15,505 --> 00:29:16,631
You bringing anyone?
692
00:29:16,798 --> 00:29:18,341
To the dumb party?
693
00:29:18,508 --> 00:29:20,927
- Any guys?
- Me?
694
00:29:21,094 --> 00:29:23,888
Yeah, I'm bringing these two guys...
695
00:29:24,055 --> 00:29:26,516
...that I'm kind of dating.
696
00:29:26,683 --> 00:29:28,143
With really huge dicks.
697
00:29:28,309 --> 00:29:33,064
Who've got enormous,
almost novelty-sized dicks.
698
00:29:33,231 --> 00:29:35,442
I've been seeing a girl
with a huge vagina.
699
00:29:35,608 --> 00:29:36,734
Have you?
700
00:29:36,901 --> 00:29:38,528
I don't know if it really
has the same impact.
701
00:29:38,695 --> 00:29:41,281
I just hope that this
nice young lady's vagina...
702
00:29:41,448 --> 00:29:43,283
...is not half as big as mine.
703
00:29:43,450 --> 00:29:46,369
- Your vagina. Woopidy-woopidy.
- The biggest! I know.
704
00:29:46,536 --> 00:29:49,247
BARTENDER: Here you go.
- Thank you so much. Appreciate that.
705
00:29:49,831 --> 00:29:51,231
BARTENDER: It's on your tab.
- Cool.
706
00:29:55,211 --> 00:29:58,798
[♪♪♪]
707
00:30:02,927 --> 00:30:04,179
- Cheers!
- Cheers.
708
00:30:04,345 --> 00:30:05,680
This is so much fun!
709
00:30:07,348 --> 00:30:08,516
Mm. Good beer.
710
00:30:08,683 --> 00:30:10,683
They say beer mellows you out a bit,
which is nice.
711
00:30:10,768 --> 00:30:13,248
This is kind of cool-tasting.
Tastes like pennies or something.
712
00:30:13,313 --> 00:30:14,913
- Weird. It has a coppery flavor?
- Yeah.
713
00:30:15,064 --> 00:30:16,316
Bizarre. Maybe it's the vodka?
714
00:30:16,483 --> 00:30:18,401
You know what?
I think they gave you a Crantini.
715
00:30:18,568 --> 00:30:20,820
You ever think maybe they're all
part of the same Tini family?
716
00:30:20,987 --> 00:30:22,071
Martini, Crantini.
717
00:30:22,238 --> 00:30:24,519
- It's just a funny idea, I thought.
- I guess it's funny.
718
00:30:24,657 --> 00:30:25,700
[LAUGHING]
719
00:30:25,867 --> 00:30:29,162
- Oh. Isaac. You have a bloody nose.
- Huh?
720
00:30:29,329 --> 00:30:31,247
- I what?
- Your nose is bleeding.
721
00:30:31,414 --> 00:30:32,499
My nose is bleeding?
722
00:30:33,541 --> 00:30:35,585
- Do you not feel that?
- Oh, no!
723
00:30:35,752 --> 00:30:37,420
It's fucked. There's a lot of blood.
724
00:30:37,587 --> 00:30:40,131
No, my nose is very tingly right now. And I
actually don't feel much. That's so weird.
725
00:30:40,298 --> 00:30:41,591
Holy fuck!
726
00:30:41,758 --> 00:30:43,176
What?
727
00:30:43,343 --> 00:30:44,594
Did you bleed in my drink?
728
00:30:45,178 --> 00:30:46,554
No.
729
00:30:46,721 --> 00:30:48,681
You fucking bled in my drink, Isaac!
730
00:30:48,848 --> 00:30:50,058
I'm gonna come clean.
731
00:30:50,225 --> 00:30:52,477
I'm on a lot of cocaine right now.
I think that's what made my nose bleed.
732
00:30:52,644 --> 00:30:53,770
You're on fucking cocaine?
733
00:30:53,937 --> 00:30:55,480
- Did you drink a lot of it?
- Kind of!
734
00:30:55,647 --> 00:30:57,127
- Is it that gross?
- It's mega-gross.
735
00:30:57,273 --> 00:30:58,358
I didn't do it on purpose.
736
00:30:58,525 --> 00:31:00,944
You're a totally fucking fucked-up person.
You should not be a father. Goodbye!
737
00:31:01,110 --> 00:31:02,320
Fuck you!
738
00:31:02,487 --> 00:31:03,571
SARAH:
Fuck you, Isaac!
739
00:31:03,738 --> 00:31:04,739
I'm sorry. Fuck you!
740
00:31:04,906 --> 00:31:06,199
SARAH:
No, fuck you!
741
00:31:06,366 --> 00:31:09,077
Piss off! People are fucking in here!
742
00:31:09,285 --> 00:31:10,828
[BOTH GRUNTING]
743
00:31:11,037 --> 00:31:13,456
- Zero, 11!
- Ah!
744
00:31:13,623 --> 00:31:16,125
Okay, now... Now, take a dump.
745
00:31:16,876 --> 00:31:17,919
What?
746
00:31:18,419 --> 00:31:20,922
Hey, guys. Sorry to interrupt.
Hey, Ethan.
747
00:31:21,089 --> 00:31:22,966
We need to get the fuck out of here.
I'm losing my shit right now.
748
00:31:23,132 --> 00:31:24,133
What happened?
749
00:31:24,300 --> 00:31:25,718
Please. I wanna go right now.
750
00:31:25,885 --> 00:31:27,929
- I'm right behind you.
- Thank you.
751
00:31:28,096 --> 00:31:29,389
ETHAN: Sorry.
- I'm sorry.
752
00:31:29,722 --> 00:31:30,765
Yikes.
753
00:31:31,266 --> 00:31:32,559
Uh...
754
00:31:32,767 --> 00:31:34,269
I guess that's my cue.
755
00:31:34,435 --> 00:31:36,521
- Tell her I'm sorry.
- You don't have to be sorry.
756
00:31:36,688 --> 00:31:38,189
I guess I'll see you later.
757
00:31:38,356 --> 00:31:40,358
Okay. Oh. Hey, hey, hey.
758
00:31:40,525 --> 00:31:41,985
This is...
759
00:31:48,366 --> 00:31:50,660
Come on, man.
760
00:32:00,587 --> 00:32:02,130
CHRIS: Ethan.
- Have you seen Isaac?
761
00:32:02,297 --> 00:32:05,425
Forget Isaac. I just fame-fucked
that hipster chick in the bathroom.
762
00:32:05,592 --> 00:32:07,343
ETHAN: So that's her?
- Hell, yeah.
763
00:32:09,262 --> 00:32:10,263
ISAAC:
Can we go?
764
00:32:10,430 --> 00:32:11,556
- Are you okay?
- I'm fine! Let's go.
765
00:32:11,723 --> 00:32:12,890
ETHAN: It's after 10. We can call the
party number now.
766
00:32:13,057 --> 00:32:14,559
Let's call! Let's call!
767
00:32:14,726 --> 00:32:16,436
I'll get this address.
768
00:32:16,603 --> 00:32:18,563
This better fucking work.
769
00:32:19,939 --> 00:32:22,099
MAN [ON RECORDING]:
If you want your Christmas merry...
770
00:32:22,233 --> 00:32:25,278
...go to the corner of Grand and Berry.
771
00:32:25,445 --> 00:32:26,446
Okay.
772
00:32:26,613 --> 00:32:28,656
Grand and Berry, please!
773
00:32:29,741 --> 00:32:33,494
ETHAN: Listen, listen. Diana is also
going to the Nutcracker Ball.
774
00:32:33,661 --> 00:32:36,581
CHRIS: What?
- How crazy is that, right?
775
00:32:36,748 --> 00:32:37,749
She's cool. I miss her.
776
00:32:37,915 --> 00:32:39,555
Yeah, you shouldn't have
let her go, dude.
777
00:32:39,709 --> 00:32:42,253
You should totally get her back, bro.
My mom's named Diana.
778
00:32:42,420 --> 00:32:44,130
Yeah, thanks.
I didn't let her go.
779
00:32:44,297 --> 00:32:46,924
- She left me.
- You didn't wanna meet her parents...
780
00:32:47,091 --> 00:32:50,094
...and you never did, and you just kept
making excuses for two years.
781
00:32:50,261 --> 00:32:52,597
She made the whole relationship
about the one thing I didn't wanna do.
782
00:32:52,764 --> 00:32:54,764
Dude, you fucked up.
Isaac, tell him, he fucked up.
783
00:32:54,932 --> 00:32:56,267
- You fucked up, man.
CHRIS: See?
784
00:32:56,434 --> 00:32:58,519
Hey, Isaac. You okay?
785
00:32:59,270 --> 00:33:00,980
No, I'm not.
786
00:33:01,147 --> 00:33:04,734
I think the cocaine and the mushrooms
are reacting poorly.
787
00:33:04,901 --> 00:33:07,236
And now I think
I just got to balance it out.
788
00:33:07,403 --> 00:33:08,821
I got to make it
that I'm more on mushrooms...
789
00:33:08,988 --> 00:33:10,198
...because I was having fun
on mushrooms.
790
00:33:10,365 --> 00:33:11,949
- I have a plan.
- Chill out. Have a Red Bull.
791
00:33:12,116 --> 00:33:14,327
You could also just
stop doing drugs right now.
792
00:33:14,494 --> 00:33:16,871
Like, much more mushrooms.
793
00:33:17,038 --> 00:33:19,040
- Are you gonna be cool at this party?
- Cool as fuck, G.
794
00:33:19,207 --> 00:33:20,792
No, you're not cool, G.
795
00:33:20,958 --> 00:33:23,044
You look insane.
Only your right eye is working.
796
00:33:23,211 --> 00:33:25,171
There's gonna be a lot of
famous people at this party...
797
00:33:25,338 --> 00:33:26,673
...and I don't want you to fuck it up.
798
00:33:26,839 --> 00:33:28,091
You walk in there
looking like a shit show...
799
00:33:28,257 --> 00:33:29,384
Do I look weird now?
800
00:33:29,550 --> 00:33:31,552
CHRIS:
Yes! You look weird!
801
00:33:31,719 --> 00:33:33,429
Still weird.
802
00:33:34,055 --> 00:33:35,056
Weirder!
803
00:33:35,223 --> 00:33:36,766
- He looks fine.
CHRIS: No, you don't!
804
00:33:36,933 --> 00:33:39,018
You need to
fucking check yourself before...
805
00:33:39,560 --> 00:33:41,187
Before...
806
00:33:41,354 --> 00:33:43,481
- ...I wreck myself?
- Ugh.
807
00:33:43,648 --> 00:33:45,316
- Is that what you're saying?
- Yes.
808
00:33:45,483 --> 00:33:47,443
Chickity-check myself,
before I wrickity-wreck myself?
809
00:33:47,610 --> 00:33:49,112
How does that make someone feel?
810
00:33:49,278 --> 00:33:50,998
To be told
that they might wreck themselves.
811
00:33:51,155 --> 00:33:52,156
You're not gonna wreck yourself.
812
00:33:52,323 --> 00:33:55,076
You made him feel bad.
Why don't you just leave him alone.
813
00:33:55,243 --> 00:33:57,363
CHRIS: Look, he's not right, dude.
- Gonna mellow out.
814
00:33:57,412 --> 00:34:00,123
Why don't you have some weed
and mellow out.
815
00:34:01,040 --> 00:34:02,583
- You got the weed?
- No.
816
00:34:03,292 --> 00:34:05,169
- You got the weed, dude?
- No.
817
00:34:05,336 --> 00:34:07,755
- She stole my fucking weed.
- Ha-ha-ha.
818
00:34:07,922 --> 00:34:10,591
She was rummaging through my jacket
when I was hitting her from the back.
819
00:34:10,758 --> 00:34:12,260
I knew it! She fucking took my weed!
820
00:34:12,427 --> 00:34:13,720
That serves you right.
821
00:34:13,886 --> 00:34:16,347
Dude, it's not funny!
She stole my fucking weed!
822
00:34:16,514 --> 00:34:19,767
CHRIS: The last place I wanna be is
outside my mom's house right now.
823
00:34:20,476 --> 00:34:23,438
ETHAN:
School's far. Your mom lives close.
824
00:34:23,604 --> 00:34:25,444
How long did Mr. Green say
he would be here in?
825
00:34:25,481 --> 00:34:26,691
Half hour.
826
00:34:26,858 --> 00:34:28,609
That's fine. Let's just go inside and wait.
I'm freezing.
827
00:34:28,776 --> 00:34:30,987
No, no, no. We're not going inside.
My mom's probably asleep.
828
00:34:31,154 --> 00:34:33,794
A half hour for Mr. Green could be like
two hours of standing here.
829
00:34:33,865 --> 00:34:36,826
We could be dead by then.
We could literally die by then.
830
00:34:36,993 --> 00:34:40,079
Look, my mom doesn't know I'm here.
So let it go. We're not going upstairs.
831
00:34:40,246 --> 00:34:42,540
- Really? You didn't tell her?
- No.
832
00:34:42,874 --> 00:34:45,293
I told her I was in Philly
and I got a suite down at the Gansevoort.
833
00:34:45,460 --> 00:34:47,860
I just think your mom would be happy
to see you on Christmas.
834
00:34:48,129 --> 00:34:50,631
I'm not saying she wouldn't be happy
to see me, all right?
835
00:34:50,798 --> 00:34:52,884
There's just a lot you don't understand.
836
00:34:53,050 --> 00:34:55,678
All she wants to do is parade me around
and show me off to people.
837
00:34:55,845 --> 00:34:57,722
Last time I was here,
she made me go to church with her...
838
00:34:57,889 --> 00:35:00,099
...and sign autographs, kiss babies,
tell people all my stats...
839
00:35:00,266 --> 00:35:02,393
...and what I did last Sunday.
It's too much.
840
00:35:02,560 --> 00:35:03,840
- I have a question.
CHRIS: What?
841
00:35:03,978 --> 00:35:06,105
Does your mother
still have a Nintendo 64?
842
00:35:06,397 --> 00:35:08,608
Probably. She never
throws my stuff away. Why?
843
00:35:08,775 --> 00:35:10,985
Right. So that's why
you don't wanna go upstairs...
844
00:35:11,152 --> 00:35:12,945
...because you're gonna lose
at "GoldenEye."
845
00:35:13,529 --> 00:35:14,864
ISAAC: "GoldenEye."
- "GoldenEye."
846
00:35:15,031 --> 00:35:17,492
Okay. Let's do it. One game.
847
00:35:17,700 --> 00:35:18,993
Nobody touch shit.
848
00:35:19,160 --> 00:35:20,453
Nobody touch nothing.
849
00:35:20,620 --> 00:35:22,705
ISAAC:
But I love touching things.
850
00:35:23,498 --> 00:35:24,791
Shh-shh-shh.
851
00:35:26,709 --> 00:35:28,169
[WHISPERING]
All right, go, go, go.
852
00:35:30,087 --> 00:35:31,339
[ISAAC LAUGHING]
853
00:35:34,383 --> 00:35:37,011
- Dude, did you die and not tell us?
- Shut up.
854
00:35:37,178 --> 00:35:38,304
It's amazing.
855
00:35:38,471 --> 00:35:40,511
I was there when you won this.
You must be so proud.
856
00:35:40,640 --> 00:35:42,391
Shut up and go.
857
00:35:42,558 --> 00:35:44,268
ISAAC: Ooh! Your bedroom.
CHRIS: Shut up.
858
00:35:45,061 --> 00:35:46,187
ISAAC:
Dude.
859
00:35:46,354 --> 00:35:47,772
- Ethan.
- What?
860
00:35:47,939 --> 00:35:49,023
I found you.
861
00:35:49,190 --> 00:35:50,900
ETHAN: You found me?
- Check you out.
862
00:35:52,026 --> 00:35:53,027
ETHAN:
Oh!
863
00:35:53,236 --> 00:35:54,612
[LAUGHING]
864
00:35:55,029 --> 00:35:56,447
Look at you, man.
865
00:35:56,656 --> 00:35:57,990
[ISAAC CHUCKLING]
866
00:35:58,908 --> 00:36:02,620
You remember when we all first met at
the party? Whose fucking party was that?
867
00:36:03,120 --> 00:36:04,497
- Jocelyn Larue.
- Jocelyn Larue.
868
00:36:04,664 --> 00:36:05,748
ISAAC:
Yeah, that's right.
869
00:36:05,915 --> 00:36:08,376
Remember the cops came?
We had to hide in the bathroom.
870
00:36:08,543 --> 00:36:10,127
For three hours.
871
00:36:10,294 --> 00:36:12,755
I was afraid we were gonna get caught,
because you were so fucking loud.
872
00:36:12,922 --> 00:36:15,216
I remember you wore that
Bob Marley tie-dye T-shirt...
873
00:36:15,383 --> 00:36:16,592
...and I asked you
if you smoked weed?
874
00:36:16,759 --> 00:36:19,199
I didn't even smoke weed.
I just liked Bob Marley and tie-dye.
875
00:36:19,262 --> 00:36:21,097
I didn't get that was the vibe
I was putting out there.
876
00:36:21,264 --> 00:36:23,641
You could have showed up
with purple hair and a cloak.
877
00:36:23,808 --> 00:36:25,268
That was my warlock phase.
878
00:36:25,434 --> 00:36:27,228
- That was a dope phase.
CHRIS: Hell, yeah.
879
00:36:27,395 --> 00:36:31,023
I'm surprised you even talked to us, Chris.
When I look back, I remember thinking:
880
00:36:31,190 --> 00:36:33,276
"This guy's a jock.
881
00:36:33,442 --> 00:36:36,696
And he's talking to a warlock
and a pretend pot-head."
882
00:36:36,863 --> 00:36:37,947
True.
883
00:36:38,114 --> 00:36:40,032
If it wasn't for y'all, I would have
never made it through that school.
884
00:36:40,241 --> 00:36:41,284
[CELL PHONE BUZZING]
885
00:36:41,492 --> 00:36:42,869
- Shit. Wait, pause it.
- No, no pause.
886
00:36:43,035 --> 00:36:45,079
The phone's buzzing.
You have to pause it.
887
00:36:45,246 --> 00:36:46,664
- I'm buying you weed!
- Shh. Just keep it down!
888
00:36:46,831 --> 00:36:49,311
Pause the fucking game.
If you shoot me right now, you forfeit.
889
00:36:49,375 --> 00:36:50,960
Oh, my God, if my mom wakes up.
890
00:36:51,419 --> 00:36:52,753
Yeah, it's him. Mr. Green's here.
891
00:36:52,920 --> 00:36:54,881
I'm never getting in that dude's car again.
He freaked me out.
892
00:36:55,089 --> 00:36:56,215
Shh.
893
00:36:56,716 --> 00:36:58,175
I'll go.
894
00:36:58,342 --> 00:36:59,719
Can you even walk?
895
00:37:01,345 --> 00:37:02,972
I can fly.
896
00:37:03,264 --> 00:37:04,932
[♪♪♪]
897
00:37:08,978 --> 00:37:10,980
Five-O, bro. You're busted.
898
00:37:11,147 --> 00:37:13,065
- Are you fucking kidding me right now?
- Yeah, I'm just kidding.
899
00:37:13,232 --> 00:37:14,859
- Holy shit, dude.
- Heh, heh.
900
00:37:15,026 --> 00:37:16,485
Don't do that.
901
00:37:16,652 --> 00:37:19,989
Oh, man. Hey, good seeing you, dude.
Long time.
902
00:37:20,156 --> 00:37:21,574
It has been a long time.
903
00:37:21,741 --> 00:37:24,076
- Been a long time, yeah.
- I remember you.
904
00:37:24,660 --> 00:37:27,747
And you know I'm proud
of what you've become.
905
00:37:28,122 --> 00:37:29,332
Husband, lawyer...
906
00:37:29,498 --> 00:37:32,543
...soon-to-be father.
That's really impressive.
907
00:37:32,710 --> 00:37:34,795
Me, I don't have time for kids.
908
00:37:35,463 --> 00:37:38,215
- You're all my children.
- Yeah.
909
00:37:38,382 --> 00:37:40,718
You ever think of me as a father figure?
910
00:37:41,093 --> 00:37:42,845
No.
911
00:37:43,012 --> 00:37:45,723
Put your tiny hand in mine.
912
00:37:47,683 --> 00:37:48,684
Yeah.
913
00:37:48,851 --> 00:37:50,061
Rough night, huh?
914
00:37:50,227 --> 00:37:53,105
Little bit. Could you tell?
Am I wearing it on my sleeve?
915
00:37:53,272 --> 00:37:54,440
I did a lot of drugs.
916
00:37:54,607 --> 00:37:57,735
Mushrooms. Caps, too many caps.
Ate a lot of the caps.
917
00:37:57,902 --> 00:38:00,863
And I just think it kind of
made me freak out a little bit.
918
00:38:01,030 --> 00:38:05,034
And basically, I'm kind of just having
a hard time finding my place in all this.
919
00:38:05,201 --> 00:38:07,370
Relax.
920
00:38:08,621 --> 00:38:10,206
What's happening right now?
921
00:38:10,831 --> 00:38:13,042
Just looking into your soul, man.
922
00:38:14,877 --> 00:38:16,045
What are you seeing?
923
00:38:19,507 --> 00:38:21,217
You need a nice mellow indica.
924
00:38:21,384 --> 00:38:23,427
I got a great north Cali bud...
925
00:38:23,594 --> 00:38:26,097
...with a soothing body high...
926
00:38:26,263 --> 00:38:29,350
...and surprisingly accurate
visions of the future.
927
00:38:30,476 --> 00:38:32,728
Yeah, sure. Whatever you got, bro.
928
00:38:33,104 --> 00:38:36,440
Yeah. It's definitely a good time.
929
00:38:36,857 --> 00:38:38,275
Unless...
930
00:38:38,693 --> 00:38:42,238
...you're dealing with some shit
you can't come to terms with.
931
00:38:43,614 --> 00:38:46,242
No! That's not me!
That's a different guy.
932
00:38:46,409 --> 00:38:50,830
I think all my issues are drug-related,
and my emotional state is completely...
933
00:38:50,997 --> 00:38:53,416
...cool, bro.
934
00:38:54,792 --> 00:38:57,795
Taste a little shot of this.
See if you like it.
935
00:39:02,133 --> 00:39:03,175
Come on.
936
00:39:03,342 --> 00:39:08,431
I'm good. I think I'll just ride the wave,
my main man.
937
00:39:09,265 --> 00:39:11,267
I put my hands on you.
938
00:39:11,434 --> 00:39:13,269
Take it.
939
00:39:14,186 --> 00:39:15,521
Just not too hard.
940
00:39:18,024 --> 00:39:19,734
Not too hard.
941
00:39:19,942 --> 00:39:21,277
[COUGHING]
942
00:39:22,653 --> 00:39:24,280
Where are we?
943
00:39:24,905 --> 00:39:26,657
A strip club.
944
00:39:26,991 --> 00:39:28,909
Eighteen years in the future.
945
00:39:29,076 --> 00:39:31,328
ISAAC: Is that my wife?
GREEN: Yeah.
946
00:39:31,495 --> 00:39:33,539
You should probably talk to her.
947
00:39:33,706 --> 00:39:36,584
I'm gonna get a beer,
maybe a dance.
948
00:39:36,751 --> 00:39:38,544
Cool.
949
00:39:38,711 --> 00:39:39,795
Hi.
950
00:39:39,962 --> 00:39:41,756
Sit down. The show's about to start.
951
00:39:41,922 --> 00:39:42,923
Okay.
952
00:39:43,090 --> 00:39:45,968
ANNOUNCER:
Okay, fellas, let's hear it for Sierra!
953
00:39:46,177 --> 00:39:47,344
BETSY:
Whoo!
954
00:39:47,553 --> 00:39:48,888
Isn't she amazing?
955
00:39:49,055 --> 00:39:50,097
Who is that?
956
00:39:50,264 --> 00:39:52,141
It's our beautiful baby girl.
957
00:39:52,308 --> 00:39:54,935
What the fuck?
958
00:39:55,144 --> 00:39:57,480
Whoo! Pop it, girl! Pop that P!
959
00:39:57,646 --> 00:39:59,273
Pop it! Pop it!
960
00:39:59,440 --> 00:40:01,650
You hear me, young lady?
Pop your pussy!
961
00:40:01,817 --> 00:40:03,944
It's okay, sweetie!
You don't have to pop your pussy!
962
00:40:04,111 --> 00:40:07,406
You read all those books
and you didn't learn shit!
963
00:40:07,573 --> 00:40:09,825
You really shit the bed as a dad!
964
00:40:10,034 --> 00:40:11,077
Unh!
965
00:40:11,285 --> 00:40:14,121
Here you go. Drip, drop. Drip, drop.
966
00:40:14,330 --> 00:40:15,414
[SCREAMS]
967
00:40:15,998 --> 00:40:16,999
GREEN: I know...
- No!
968
00:40:17,166 --> 00:40:18,793
Look at my finger. Look at my finger.
969
00:40:18,959 --> 00:40:21,587
You need to give me a hundred bucks
and get the fuck out of my car right now.
970
00:40:21,754 --> 00:40:23,672
Okay! Here!
971
00:40:24,048 --> 00:40:25,216
GREEN:
Get out.
972
00:40:27,510 --> 00:40:28,928
[TIRES SCRATCHING]
973
00:40:30,096 --> 00:40:31,472
[SIGHS]
974
00:40:47,696 --> 00:40:50,658
[UPBEAT POP SONG PLAYING
ON RINGTONE]
975
00:40:55,454 --> 00:40:56,455
What are you doing?
976
00:40:56,622 --> 00:40:58,862
I don't know what's happening.
Let's go. Let's just bail.
977
00:40:58,958 --> 00:41:00,251
Turn your phone off.
You're gonna wake her up.
978
00:41:00,417 --> 00:41:01,794
I don't know what's happening.
I don't know this song.
979
00:41:01,961 --> 00:41:03,754
- Turn it off.
WOMAN: Hello?
980
00:41:03,921 --> 00:41:05,339
Hello?
981
00:41:06,048 --> 00:41:08,717
Hey, Ma. It's Chrissy-poo!
982
00:41:08,884 --> 00:41:11,387
Oh, my God! Chris!
983
00:41:11,554 --> 00:41:12,596
CHRIS:
Hey.
984
00:41:12,763 --> 00:41:15,224
MRS. ROBERTS:
Oh, my God! Ethan!
985
00:41:15,432 --> 00:41:16,892
[MRS. ROBERTS LAUGHS]
986
00:41:17,101 --> 00:41:18,686
What are you guys doing?
987
00:41:18,853 --> 00:41:20,938
- Merry Christmas.
- Surprise.
988
00:41:21,105 --> 00:41:22,606
This is...
989
00:41:23,190 --> 00:41:25,401
Are you hungry?
I can heat up some food.
990
00:41:25,568 --> 00:41:27,403
ETHAN: Yeah.
- No, no, no.
991
00:41:27,570 --> 00:41:29,655
Yes, you are. Yes, you are.
992
00:41:30,239 --> 00:41:31,282
Sweetheart.
993
00:41:31,448 --> 00:41:34,243
- Oh, you smell like weed.
- No.
994
00:41:35,327 --> 00:41:37,163
- More meatloaf, Isaac?
- Huh?
995
00:41:37,371 --> 00:41:39,498
Um, no, I'm okay.
996
00:41:39,665 --> 00:41:42,168
Could I perhaps
have some more chardonnay...
997
00:41:42,334 --> 00:41:44,420
...to wash down
my medication, please?
998
00:41:44,879 --> 00:41:46,797
MRS. ROBERTS:
Of course.
999
00:41:52,845 --> 00:41:53,846
Thank you.
1000
00:41:55,472 --> 00:41:57,057
So, Ethan, what's going on with you?
1001
00:41:57,266 --> 00:41:58,267
Uh...
1002
00:41:58,475 --> 00:42:01,061
Not a lot. Just feeling good.
1003
00:42:01,228 --> 00:42:02,897
You got somebody special in your life?
1004
00:42:03,063 --> 00:42:04,231
No.
1005
00:42:04,398 --> 00:42:07,443
There was a young lady that he
used to date that he ran into today...
1006
00:42:07,818 --> 00:42:10,237
...that I thought
was pretty damn awesome.
1007
00:42:10,404 --> 00:42:12,615
- Yeah? What happened?
- It's a long story.
1008
00:42:12,781 --> 00:42:15,741
Not that long. She wanted to get serious,
but he wouldn't meet her parents.
1009
00:42:16,035 --> 00:42:17,286
She wanted to move in...
1010
00:42:17,453 --> 00:42:20,253
...and you said you weren't
in the right head place for her to move in.
1011
00:42:20,289 --> 00:42:21,609
That's some straight-up bullshit.
1012
00:42:21,749 --> 00:42:22,958
Give me some, Ma.
1013
00:42:23,125 --> 00:42:24,501
ETHAN:
Okay, okay, okay.
1014
00:42:24,668 --> 00:42:26,420
What, are you guys
ganging up on me now?
1015
00:42:26,587 --> 00:42:27,671
You like this woman?
1016
00:42:27,838 --> 00:42:29,089
Yeah, she's awesome...
1017
00:42:29,256 --> 00:42:32,134
...but there's a whole history here
that he's brushing over.
1018
00:42:32,301 --> 00:42:33,636
You want her back?
1019
00:42:34,220 --> 00:42:36,013
Yeah. I do.
1020
00:42:36,180 --> 00:42:38,599
If you want this woman,
you're gonna have to work for her.
1021
00:42:38,766 --> 00:42:42,603
But you happen to be very lucky,
because it's Christmas.
1022
00:42:42,770 --> 00:42:45,189
And there's magic in the air
at Christmas.
1023
00:42:45,356 --> 00:42:48,025
People's hearts are open.
People want to forgive.
1024
00:42:48,442 --> 00:42:50,486
People want love.
1025
00:42:50,653 --> 00:42:52,488
I'd take advantage of that shit.
1026
00:42:52,655 --> 00:42:56,992
- Find the opportunity, and seize it.
- Thank you, Mrs. Roberts.
1027
00:42:57,201 --> 00:42:58,244
[CELL PHONE CHIMES]
1028
00:42:58,452 --> 00:43:01,052
MRS. ROBERTS: I almost forgot, I'm
gonna need some more headshots.
1029
00:43:03,165 --> 00:43:05,793
ISAAC: Huh. A dick
from someone named James?
1030
00:43:05,960 --> 00:43:08,087
His name is on my phone,
I must know him. Who is he?
1031
00:43:08,295 --> 00:43:09,463
[PHONE CHIMES]
1032
00:43:09,630 --> 00:43:11,548
Do I like it? What does that mean?
1033
00:43:11,715 --> 00:43:15,511
Oh, man. Maybe it's
James McFoley from work.
1034
00:43:15,719 --> 00:43:16,845
[PHONE CHIMES]
1035
00:43:17,388 --> 00:43:18,389
Holy shit.
1036
00:43:20,474 --> 00:43:22,142
This guy's a grower and a shower.
1037
00:43:22,351 --> 00:43:23,477
[PHONE CHIMES]
1038
00:43:23,978 --> 00:43:26,188
Do I like it more now? Jesus.
I mean, it's a dope dick.
1039
00:43:28,190 --> 00:43:29,191
[PHONE CHIMES]
1040
00:43:29,358 --> 00:43:31,235
Do I want it?
1041
00:43:32,152 --> 00:43:34,488
Who wouldn't want a dick
that looks like that?
1042
00:43:35,406 --> 00:43:36,490
[PHONE CHIMES]
1043
00:43:37,032 --> 00:43:38,867
Do I wanna suck it? Oh, man.
1044
00:43:39,076 --> 00:43:40,160
Uh...
1045
00:43:40,369 --> 00:43:42,913
I'm gonna start putting people's
last names on my contacts.
1046
00:43:45,124 --> 00:43:46,166
[PHONE CHIMES]
1047
00:43:46,417 --> 00:43:52,172
No, I've never sucked a dick but, well,
if I'm being totally honest with myself...
1048
00:43:55,467 --> 00:43:56,844
Damn it, why'd I tell him that?
1049
00:43:57,011 --> 00:43:59,972
This James guy is just
so easy to talk to. I told him too much.
1050
00:44:00,180 --> 00:44:01,265
[PHONE CHIMES]
1051
00:44:03,267 --> 00:44:05,269
Man, I guess that settles it.
1052
00:44:05,436 --> 00:44:08,272
Isaac Greenberg
is sucking his first dick tonight.
1053
00:44:08,856 --> 00:44:10,941
Did he tell you that they've
named a park after him?
1054
00:44:11,108 --> 00:44:12,276
You're gonna have a park
named after you?
1055
00:44:12,443 --> 00:44:14,737
I petitioned the city,
I got the signatures...
1056
00:44:14,903 --> 00:44:17,573
...and now there's gonna be the sweetest
little playground in Brooklyn...
1057
00:44:17,740 --> 00:44:18,907
...that's named after him.
1058
00:44:19,074 --> 00:44:21,827
The park is not that nice!
There are crackheads and...
1059
00:44:21,994 --> 00:44:23,662
Sweetheart, they're gonna
clean that up.
1060
00:44:23,829 --> 00:44:26,123
We should get ready to go, guys. We have
to move. We're gonna miss the party.
1061
00:44:26,290 --> 00:44:29,251
- That's true.
- Why don't I just wrap all of this up.
1062
00:44:29,418 --> 00:44:31,754
You guys can take it down
to the homeless shelter.
1063
00:44:31,920 --> 00:44:34,882
It's only a few blocks away.
I'm sure they'd appreciate it.
1064
00:44:35,632 --> 00:44:36,675
You're right, Mom.
1065
00:44:36,842 --> 00:44:39,094
You boys are so sweet.
Thank you for coming.
1066
00:44:39,303 --> 00:44:40,503
[PHONE CHIMES
AND ISAAC GROANS]
1067
00:44:40,596 --> 00:44:42,556
- Wanna help me in the kitchen?
- Okay.
1068
00:44:42,723 --> 00:44:44,283
Thanks so much for dinner,
Mrs. Roberts.
1069
00:44:44,350 --> 00:44:45,976
MRS. ROBERTS:
You're welcome, sweetheart!
1070
00:44:46,769 --> 00:44:48,896
Dude, what the fuck
is going on with you?
1071
00:44:49,646 --> 00:44:51,190
- Are you gay?
- No.
1072
00:44:51,357 --> 00:44:52,524
Are you curious?
1073
00:44:52,691 --> 00:44:55,402
Everyone is! What does that
have to do with this?
1074
00:44:55,569 --> 00:44:57,279
I don't know.
Why are you looking up dicks?
1075
00:44:57,446 --> 00:44:59,907
- Someone's sending me dicks.
- Someone's sending you that?
1076
00:45:00,074 --> 00:45:03,243
Look, I'll show you. It's a fucking
conversation. It's some guy named James.
1077
00:45:03,410 --> 00:45:05,579
A very nice, eloquent man named James
is sending me his penis.
1078
00:45:05,746 --> 00:45:06,955
And he wants me to suck on it.
1079
00:45:07,122 --> 00:45:09,833
I don't know what to do. I'm fucking
freaking out. Do I do it? Should I do it?
1080
00:45:10,000 --> 00:45:11,251
This isn't your phone, man.
1081
00:45:11,418 --> 00:45:12,795
Dude, this isn't your phone.
1082
00:45:12,961 --> 00:45:14,505
Oh, shit. Is this Sarah's phone?
1083
00:45:15,381 --> 00:45:17,091
- Oh, no.
- What?
1084
00:45:17,257 --> 00:45:18,675
She has my phone.
1085
00:45:18,842 --> 00:45:21,261
It's okay, man. We know her.
We can get your phone back.
1086
00:45:21,595 --> 00:45:23,305
There's something bad on my phone.
1087
00:45:23,472 --> 00:45:25,099
You gonna be around tomorrow?
1088
00:45:25,265 --> 00:45:27,976
Folks out at the church would love to
see you. Aunt would too.
1089
00:45:28,143 --> 00:45:30,270
Um, you know I'm busy, so...
1090
00:45:30,437 --> 00:45:32,106
I don't really like to do that stuff, Ma.
1091
00:45:32,272 --> 00:45:33,607
Won't take much time, Boo.
1092
00:45:33,774 --> 00:45:35,943
I know. It's just I have an early flight...
1093
00:45:36,110 --> 00:45:38,779
...and I really feel bad
that I have to run back to work so fast.
1094
00:45:38,946 --> 00:45:40,781
I just got so much stuff going on.
1095
00:45:40,948 --> 00:45:42,199
I'm a celebrity now.
1096
00:45:42,366 --> 00:45:44,785
I got appearances.
I got all kinds of stuff I have to do, Ma.
1097
00:45:44,993 --> 00:45:47,413
I can't just be lollygagging around...
1098
00:45:47,579 --> 00:45:49,331
...and meeting old people.
1099
00:45:50,541 --> 00:45:51,750
I love you.
1100
00:45:51,917 --> 00:45:54,086
Betsy is gonna get that tape
from Sarah...
1101
00:45:54,253 --> 00:45:55,921
...and she's gonna freak the fuck out.
1102
00:45:56,088 --> 00:45:58,090
Why? Why would Betsy get the tape?
1103
00:45:58,257 --> 00:46:01,427
Because I put cocaine blood
into her fucking drink.
1104
00:46:01,593 --> 00:46:03,429
And no one
wants to drink cocaine blood.
1105
00:46:03,595 --> 00:46:05,222
Yeah. I'm gonna call her.
1106
00:46:05,389 --> 00:46:07,433
- How do you know her number?
- It's your number.
1107
00:46:07,599 --> 00:46:08,767
I'm trusting you on this.
1108
00:46:08,934 --> 00:46:11,145
I don't understand what's happening.
Where are we?
1109
00:46:11,311 --> 00:46:13,063
Sarah has your phone.
So I'm calling it.
1110
00:46:13,230 --> 00:46:14,648
Where are we right now?
1111
00:46:14,815 --> 00:46:16,900
- We're at Chris' house.
- What the fuck?
1112
00:46:17,067 --> 00:46:19,570
You just stay calm, all right?
1113
00:46:19,736 --> 00:46:21,572
- It'll be okay.
- Oh, yeah.
1114
00:46:21,989 --> 00:46:22,990
Oh, yeah.
1115
00:46:23,157 --> 00:46:24,408
You like that?
1116
00:46:24,616 --> 00:46:27,077
Okay. Here's the bad news.
1117
00:46:27,244 --> 00:46:28,704
- She didn't pick up.
- What?!
1118
00:46:28,871 --> 00:46:30,747
- Everything's fine.
ISAAC: I bit my tongue.
1119
00:46:30,914 --> 00:46:32,291
That boy need Jesus.
1120
00:46:32,458 --> 00:46:33,625
He needs something.
1121
00:46:33,792 --> 00:46:34,918
It's gonna be okay, though.
1122
00:46:35,085 --> 00:46:37,379
You know what I'm gonna do? I'm gonna
use Find My iPhone and find the phone.
1123
00:46:37,546 --> 00:46:40,424
It's loading. There it is! It's in midtown.
1124
00:46:40,591 --> 00:46:43,093
- Your phone's in midtown. It's all good.
- Ha-ha!
1125
00:46:43,260 --> 00:46:45,971
Okay. All right. So here's the thing.
1126
00:46:46,138 --> 00:46:48,557
We're gonna go to the party,
because Sarah's gonna go to the party.
1127
00:46:48,724 --> 00:46:49,766
Guys, let's go.
1128
00:46:49,933 --> 00:46:51,768
- You be safe.
- Guys, be careful.
1129
00:46:51,935 --> 00:46:52,936
CHRIS:
Let's go, guys!
1130
00:46:53,103 --> 00:46:56,273
MRS. ROBERTS: Let me get you a bag.
You're gonna need a bag. Wait up!
1131
00:46:56,440 --> 00:46:58,692
This guy's dick is off the charts.
1132
00:46:58,859 --> 00:47:01,899
Yo, it's your man C-Rob coming at you
live from outside the homeless shelter.
1133
00:47:01,945 --> 00:47:03,822
We delivering turkeys
to homeless people...
1134
00:47:03,989 --> 00:47:06,867
...because it's the giving season and they
do be gobbling, you know what I mean?
1135
00:47:07,034 --> 00:47:10,662
If you're in the season of giving, hit me up
@Chrisrob11, hashtag "selfless giving."
1136
00:47:10,829 --> 00:47:13,290
And remember, it's not a good deed
if no one knows about it.
1137
00:47:13,457 --> 00:47:16,084
- I got another dick, dude!
- Uh, drink Red Bull.
1138
00:47:17,127 --> 00:47:19,046
Oh, shit. Look, man, it's her!
1139
00:47:19,213 --> 00:47:22,466
It's the super fan,
sex maniac that stole my weed.
1140
00:47:22,633 --> 00:47:23,673
Come on, let's follow her.
1141
00:47:23,800 --> 00:47:26,386
No, we're not gonna follow her. Let's just
drop off the food and go to the party!
1142
00:47:26,553 --> 00:47:29,932
CHRIS: Shit! Look! Now she's stealing
from homeless people!
1143
00:47:30,098 --> 00:47:31,475
That's not right!
1144
00:47:31,642 --> 00:47:33,685
- Now, I'm going to teach her a lesson.
- Okay.
1145
00:47:33,852 --> 00:47:36,563
CHRIS:
Hey! Did you steal my weed?
1146
00:47:36,980 --> 00:47:39,525
- Uh, no.
- We just saw you...
1147
00:47:39,691 --> 00:47:42,011
...rob some homeless people
and I'm missing my weed, so...
1148
00:47:42,528 --> 00:47:44,780
You got me, I stole your weed.
1149
00:47:44,947 --> 00:47:48,909
But I told you right away
that I'm kind of a Grinch. Okay?
1150
00:47:49,117 --> 00:47:51,870
WOMAN: Unh!
- Ooh. Eat me, sheep.
1151
00:47:52,037 --> 00:47:54,357
You're an actual Grinch.
You're like the mayor of Whoville.
1152
00:47:54,414 --> 00:47:55,916
I'm building a body of work.
1153
00:47:56,083 --> 00:47:58,252
I'm following in the path
of my Christmas heroes:
1154
00:47:58,418 --> 00:48:02,256
The Grinch, the Sticky Bandits,
Hans Gruber from Die Hard.
1155
00:48:02,422 --> 00:48:06,260
I walked by you and I heard you
going on about your Christmas plans...
1156
00:48:06,426 --> 00:48:10,138
...and you're this football douche
and I Google you...
1157
00:48:10,472 --> 00:48:12,808
Jackpot! I pretend to be a fan...
1158
00:48:12,975 --> 00:48:14,268
...we have sex, yes.
1159
00:48:14,434 --> 00:48:15,602
And then I stole your weed.
1160
00:48:15,769 --> 00:48:18,009
It's Christmas! You don't steal
from people on Christmas.
1161
00:48:18,105 --> 00:48:19,398
I just want my weed back.
1162
00:48:19,565 --> 00:48:21,233
You're really cute when you get mad.
1163
00:48:21,400 --> 00:48:22,901
That's cute.
1164
00:48:23,068 --> 00:48:26,321
This is the thing I didn't expect.
To fucking like you, dude.
1165
00:48:26,488 --> 00:48:28,323
You are so funny...
1166
00:48:28,490 --> 00:48:30,617
...and talented, and handsome.
1167
00:48:31,201 --> 00:48:33,245
And easy. My God, dude!
1168
00:48:33,996 --> 00:48:35,205
Hey!
1169
00:48:36,456 --> 00:48:38,959
I'm gonna fucking catch... Ah! Unh!
1170
00:48:40,002 --> 00:48:41,295
Later, sucka!
1171
00:48:41,461 --> 00:48:42,713
CHRIS:
She Home Alone'd me!
1172
00:48:42,879 --> 00:48:43,964
Are these Micro Machines?
1173
00:48:44,131 --> 00:48:45,591
ISAAC: Wow!
- Let's go.
1174
00:48:45,757 --> 00:48:46,800
Girl's a genius.
1175
00:48:46,967 --> 00:48:49,845
Josh, hit the gas! Go!
We got to catch that girl!
1176
00:48:50,012 --> 00:48:52,572
Go down to the corner and make a right!
Hurry up, man! Chase her!
1177
00:48:52,681 --> 00:48:54,850
- Who?
- The girl who stole my weed! Hurry up!
1178
00:48:55,017 --> 00:48:56,351
- She stole your weed?
- Yeah.
1179
00:48:56,518 --> 00:48:58,103
That fucking bitch. I'm gonna kill her.
1180
00:48:58,270 --> 00:48:59,271
Go get her, baby!
1181
00:48:59,771 --> 00:49:00,856
[TIRES SCREECHING]
1182
00:49:01,648 --> 00:49:02,816
Not so fast!
1183
00:49:03,066 --> 00:49:04,568
[LAUGHING]
1184
00:49:08,447 --> 00:49:09,781
Guys, my iPhone's that way!
1185
00:49:09,948 --> 00:49:12,188
We got to find my iPhone!
It's the other direction! Wait!
1186
00:49:13,660 --> 00:49:14,703
Slow down!
1187
00:49:14,870 --> 00:49:17,789
Speed up! Don't slow down!
If you're my guy, you won't slow down!
1188
00:49:17,956 --> 00:49:19,082
Hit the gas! Hit the gas!
1189
00:49:19,249 --> 00:49:20,250
Let's go.
1190
00:49:20,667 --> 00:49:22,085
[TIRES SCREECHING]
1191
00:49:22,919 --> 00:49:24,254
[GRUNTING]
1192
00:49:25,255 --> 00:49:26,798
CHRIS:
There she is! There she is!
1193
00:49:26,965 --> 00:49:28,759
We got her! We got her!
1194
00:49:29,718 --> 00:49:31,303
Red light, red light!
1195
00:49:31,470 --> 00:49:33,555
No! You run that light! Are you my guy?
1196
00:49:34,014 --> 00:49:35,015
I'm your guy.
1197
00:49:35,182 --> 00:49:37,392
Give me your hand!
Go through that light, baby!
1198
00:49:37,601 --> 00:49:38,852
[SCREAMS]
1199
00:49:45,942 --> 00:49:50,072
Oh, I fucked up. I fucked up.
1200
00:49:50,697 --> 00:49:52,449
I'm sorry.
1201
00:49:53,033 --> 00:49:54,368
ISAAC:
Unh! Oh!
1202
00:49:54,576 --> 00:49:56,662
- Are we alive?
- Yeah.
1203
00:49:56,828 --> 00:49:59,373
Look. Look, it's a sleigh.
We can still get her.
1204
00:49:59,539 --> 00:50:01,375
No. Let's just go to the party, okay?
1205
00:50:01,541 --> 00:50:02,834
We're going on a sleigh ride!
1206
00:50:03,001 --> 00:50:04,294
No. We're not going on a sleigh ride.
1207
00:50:04,461 --> 00:50:05,462
Come on, Joshua!
1208
00:50:08,465 --> 00:50:09,633
Shotgun! Ha-ha-ha.
1209
00:50:10,008 --> 00:50:11,635
Shotgun!
1210
00:50:11,802 --> 00:50:14,083
CHRIS: Hurry up.
- You guys know this can't possibly work.
1211
00:50:14,221 --> 00:50:15,305
Of course it'll work!
1212
00:50:15,472 --> 00:50:17,057
- Let's get that Grinch!
- Let's find my phone!
1213
00:50:17,224 --> 00:50:19,768
- Mush, motherfucker!
ISAAC: Whoa!
1214
00:50:21,728 --> 00:50:23,563
[ISAAC SCREAMING]
1215
00:50:23,730 --> 00:50:25,232
[HORSE NEIGHING]
1216
00:50:26,942 --> 00:50:28,151
I'm stuck!
1217
00:50:28,318 --> 00:50:29,695
My hands are stuck!
1218
00:50:29,903 --> 00:50:31,238
[CAR HORN HONKING]
1219
00:50:31,446 --> 00:50:32,614
No, no, no!
1220
00:50:32,781 --> 00:50:33,824
Fuck!
1221
00:50:35,325 --> 00:50:36,326
Shit, shit, shit!
1222
00:50:37,369 --> 00:50:38,662
Unh!
1223
00:50:38,870 --> 00:50:40,163
CHRIS:
Dude!
1224
00:50:40,706 --> 00:50:42,499
What happened just now?
1225
00:50:42,666 --> 00:50:44,209
He's okay. He looks okay.
1226
00:50:44,376 --> 00:50:46,920
We have to go! She went this way!
Let's go get this weed!
1227
00:50:47,087 --> 00:50:48,380
No. Forget about the weed, man.
1228
00:50:48,547 --> 00:50:50,340
We're not gonna split up now.
Let's go to the party.
1229
00:50:50,507 --> 00:50:53,227
No. You don't understand, man!
It's really important! It's for Tommy.
1230
00:50:53,301 --> 00:50:54,428
It's not important.
1231
00:50:54,594 --> 00:50:55,887
I'll meet you at the F Train.
1232
00:50:56,054 --> 00:50:57,305
You fucking believe this guy?
1233
00:50:57,472 --> 00:50:58,473
[PHONE CHIMES]
1234
00:50:58,640 --> 00:51:00,016
My phone! It's close! I got to go!
1235
00:51:00,183 --> 00:51:02,519
- No. Listen to me.
- No. You listen to me.
1236
00:51:02,686 --> 00:51:05,313
If I die, they will
play this video at my funeral!
1237
00:51:05,480 --> 00:51:07,357
- Okay! You're on drugs!
- Yes!
1238
00:51:07,524 --> 00:51:08,859
- You're not making sense!
- No!
1239
00:51:09,025 --> 00:51:10,485
- Trust me.
- Okay.
1240
00:51:10,652 --> 00:51:13,071
We're gonna stick together.
And go to the party.
1241
00:51:13,488 --> 00:51:14,648
I'll meet you at the F Train!
1242
00:51:14,781 --> 00:51:17,284
No! Dude! What the fuck!
1243
00:51:18,660 --> 00:51:19,953
ISAAC:
This is crazy.
1244
00:51:20,120 --> 00:51:23,457
Oh, come on.
How does this fucking work?
1245
00:51:23,623 --> 00:51:25,417
This is so confusing.
1246
00:51:25,584 --> 00:51:27,169
Fuck!
1247
00:51:27,335 --> 00:51:28,670
Ugh. My eyes aren't working.
1248
00:51:28,837 --> 00:51:30,839
What asshole
invented this stupid thing?
1249
00:51:35,260 --> 00:51:38,472
- Hey, man. Excuse me.
MAN 1: Hey, dude. How's it going?
1250
00:51:38,638 --> 00:51:40,390
- I'm Isaac.
- Hi, Isaac.
1251
00:51:40,557 --> 00:51:41,850
I hate to bug you.
1252
00:51:42,017 --> 00:51:45,270
I lost my phone, and I'm using this app
to try to find it.
1253
00:51:45,437 --> 00:51:47,917
I'm kind of having a hard time.
It's confusing me a little bit.
1254
00:51:48,023 --> 00:51:49,232
You think you can maybe help me out?
1255
00:51:49,399 --> 00:51:50,734
Sure, hold my cane for a second.
1256
00:51:50,901 --> 00:51:53,653
Awesome. Sure, I'll hold your cane.
1257
00:51:54,196 --> 00:51:55,655
Hey, Merry Christmas, Isaac.
1258
00:51:55,822 --> 00:51:57,532
Merry Christmas to you too, man.
1259
00:51:57,699 --> 00:51:58,825
Thanks.
1260
00:51:58,992 --> 00:52:00,994
I've been having a pretty crazy night.
1261
00:52:01,161 --> 00:52:04,206
I'm gonna level with you,
I'm a little fucked up right now.
1262
00:52:04,372 --> 00:52:06,875
- Heh-heh. No way. You don't say?
- Yeah. Yeah.
1263
00:52:07,042 --> 00:52:09,002
- What's your name?
- Spencer.
1264
00:52:09,169 --> 00:52:10,670
That's my family over there.
1265
00:52:10,837 --> 00:52:12,798
Hi! I'm Isaac, nice to meet you.
1266
00:52:12,964 --> 00:52:14,800
MAN 2: What's up, man?
MAN 3: Hey.
1267
00:52:15,133 --> 00:52:16,968
You have dogs.
1268
00:52:17,135 --> 00:52:19,304
- Can I pet them?
- Go ahead. They're fine.
1269
00:52:19,471 --> 00:52:21,311
ISAAC: Thank you.
SPENCER: You're very welcome.
1270
00:52:21,473 --> 00:52:23,642
ISAAC: Hi, guys.
DONKEY: What's up, Isaac?
1271
00:52:23,809 --> 00:52:25,602
Come on and give us a pat.
1272
00:52:25,769 --> 00:52:27,521
ISAAC:
Oh my God, they talk! Ha-ha.
1273
00:52:27,687 --> 00:52:29,189
Of course. All dogs can talk.
1274
00:52:29,356 --> 00:52:31,399
ISAAC: There's another one.
SHEEP: That tickles.
1275
00:52:31,566 --> 00:52:32,609
Oh, hi. I love you.
1276
00:52:32,776 --> 00:52:33,944
BETSY:
Isaac?
1277
00:52:35,904 --> 00:52:36,988
Betsy.
1278
00:52:37,155 --> 00:52:38,323
Oh, shit.
1279
00:52:39,574 --> 00:52:40,617
[LAUGHS]
1280
00:52:40,826 --> 00:52:42,369
Hi.
1281
00:52:42,577 --> 00:52:44,329
Wow. Ha-ha-ha.
1282
00:52:44,538 --> 00:52:46,248
- Hi.
- Hi.
1283
00:52:46,414 --> 00:52:47,541
BETSY:
Oh. Okay.
1284
00:52:47,958 --> 00:52:50,252
ISAAC:
I never wanna let go.
1285
00:52:50,418 --> 00:52:51,878
What's happening?
1286
00:52:52,045 --> 00:52:53,755
What are you doing here right now?
1287
00:52:53,922 --> 00:52:56,132
What were you doing
in the nativity scene?
1288
00:52:56,299 --> 00:52:57,884
I was hanging out
with Spencer and his family.
1289
00:52:58,051 --> 00:52:59,511
- They're really beautiful people.
- Spencer?
1290
00:52:59,678 --> 00:53:01,721
They're great people.
They're interracial.
1291
00:53:01,888 --> 00:53:03,974
Why do you have the staff, honey?
1292
00:53:04,349 --> 00:53:06,268
What's happening right now?
Where are we now?
1293
00:53:06,434 --> 00:53:07,978
This is the church. Do you remember?
1294
00:53:08,144 --> 00:53:09,813
- You're here for that?
- Yes.
1295
00:53:09,980 --> 00:53:12,232
And I'm just telling you right now
that you need to go...
1296
00:53:12,399 --> 00:53:15,151
...because my family
is paying for the cab right now.
1297
00:53:15,318 --> 00:53:17,445
So you need to get out of here
before they show up.
1298
00:53:17,612 --> 00:53:18,613
- Your family is coming?
- Yeah.
1299
00:53:18,780 --> 00:53:20,866
- So maybe go and run the other way.
- Where should I go?
1300
00:53:21,032 --> 00:53:22,993
Just fucking go
before they get here. Go.
1301
00:53:23,159 --> 00:53:25,412
I love you. Okay? I love you.
1302
00:53:25,579 --> 00:53:27,789
ISAAC: Okay. I love you. Bye.
- All right, bye.
1303
00:53:27,956 --> 00:53:29,749
That's very sweet. Bye.
1304
00:53:29,916 --> 00:53:31,793
What are you coming back for?
Just go that way!
1305
00:53:31,960 --> 00:53:33,211
ISAAC:
I don't know where...
1306
00:53:33,378 --> 00:53:35,171
BETSY:
No, no, no! Not inside the church.
1307
00:53:35,338 --> 00:53:36,506
Go, go, go.
1308
00:53:36,673 --> 00:53:37,841
Get the fuck out of here.
1309
00:53:38,008 --> 00:53:40,176
ISAAC: Wait. I know them. Hi!
BETSY: Hi.
1310
00:53:40,343 --> 00:53:41,678
ISAAC:
Hi!
1311
00:53:41,845 --> 00:53:44,325
- Oh, my God! Look at you guys.
CINDY: It's so good to see you!
1312
00:53:44,431 --> 00:53:45,682
What a hat.
1313
00:53:45,849 --> 00:53:48,268
Why don't you come join us.
Come on in for midnight mass.
1314
00:53:48,435 --> 00:53:50,687
Oh, no. I don't think that's a good idea.
1315
00:53:50,854 --> 00:53:51,855
CINDY:
Why not?
1316
00:53:52,022 --> 00:53:54,274
Because he's hanging out
with his friends tonight. Right, Isaac?
1317
00:53:54,441 --> 00:53:57,068
- I don't see anybody.
- I don't know where they are right now.
1318
00:53:57,235 --> 00:53:59,195
- Come sit with us.
- I've never been in a church.
1319
00:53:59,321 --> 00:54:00,447
CINDY:
Come on.
1320
00:54:00,614 --> 00:54:02,115
Okay. Yeah?
1321
00:54:02,282 --> 00:54:04,242
CINDY:
Yeah. Great! I'll see you in there!
1322
00:54:04,409 --> 00:54:05,869
Let's go to midnight mass together.
1323
00:54:06,036 --> 00:54:08,997
Okay. Yeah, if you say so.
1324
00:54:09,164 --> 00:54:10,665
BETSY:
Save us a seat.
1325
00:54:10,832 --> 00:54:12,334
How fucked up are you right now?
1326
00:54:14,294 --> 00:54:16,588
I'm not fucked up at all, Betsy.
I'm your rock.
1327
00:54:16,755 --> 00:54:18,048
You look like a crack rock.
1328
00:54:18,214 --> 00:54:20,634
ISAAC: I'm not. Don't say that.
Are you mad at me?
1329
00:54:20,800 --> 00:54:22,761
BETSY: No, just walk normal, please.
- I'm walking normal.
1330
00:54:22,928 --> 00:54:24,387
BETSY:
No, you're not.
1331
00:54:24,554 --> 00:54:26,890
Don't put it there, Isaac. Okay.
1332
00:54:27,057 --> 00:54:28,391
And it's gone.
1333
00:54:28,558 --> 00:54:30,685
Hi. Merry Christmas.
1334
00:54:30,894 --> 00:54:32,437
[♪♪♪]
1335
00:54:34,606 --> 00:54:36,358
[MAN 1 GROANING]
1336
00:54:37,525 --> 00:54:39,110
MAN 2:
Are you giving birth to piss?
1337
00:54:39,277 --> 00:54:42,280
MAN 1: Oh, my God. I'm just
trying not to shit my pants.
1338
00:54:42,447 --> 00:54:44,074
MAN 2: You should.
MAN 1: I should?
1339
00:54:44,240 --> 00:54:45,784
MAN 2:
You should just do it. Why not?
1340
00:54:45,951 --> 00:54:47,452
MAN 1:
I should just drop a deuce in my shorts.
1341
00:54:47,619 --> 00:54:48,912
MAN 2:
Just do it!
1342
00:54:49,079 --> 00:54:52,374
ETHAN: That's great. Two more assholes
that don't give a fuck about Christmas.
1343
00:54:52,540 --> 00:54:53,583
What?
1344
00:54:53,750 --> 00:54:55,126
What are you guys doing?
1345
00:54:55,293 --> 00:54:56,795
Santa pub crawl, bro!
1346
00:54:56,962 --> 00:55:01,591
Guys, Santa Claus is a very
meaningful thing to a lot of people.
1347
00:55:01,758 --> 00:55:04,010
A lot of children.
1348
00:55:04,177 --> 00:55:07,847
Here's the thing, man. For those kids,
they're living a fucking lie!
1349
00:55:08,014 --> 00:55:09,432
MAN 2:
Yeah. Spoiler alert:
1350
00:55:09,599 --> 00:55:11,685
Santa's not real, you pricky infant.
1351
00:55:11,851 --> 00:55:13,311
This is a costume!
1352
00:55:13,478 --> 00:55:17,565
But when you put on that costume
and you portray Santa Claus...
1353
00:55:17,732 --> 00:55:22,237
...you're taking a solemn oath
to represent certain values...
1354
00:55:22,404 --> 00:55:23,989
...that it represents!
1355
00:55:24,155 --> 00:55:27,200
You know who you remind me of?
One of my angry elves.
1356
00:55:27,367 --> 00:55:29,285
Fuck! No. Look, don't call me an elf.
1357
00:55:29,452 --> 00:55:30,829
I think you got him with that one, Santa.
1358
00:55:30,996 --> 00:55:32,622
MAN 2: Fuck you, "don't call me an elf!"
Motherfucker!
1359
00:55:32,789 --> 00:55:34,791
Get back to the workshop!
You work for us, elf!
1360
00:55:34,958 --> 00:55:37,043
- Go back to the workshop, elf!
- Ha-ha-ha.
1361
00:55:37,711 --> 00:55:40,505
This little elf
has no friends on Christmas.
1362
00:55:40,672 --> 00:55:42,590
My friends are just down there.
1363
00:55:42,757 --> 00:55:45,969
Where are they? We're friends.
We even dressed the same...
1364
00:55:46,136 --> 00:55:48,930
...but you, you're all alone,
just like a fucking dum-dum.
1365
00:55:49,097 --> 00:55:51,182
Oh, my God. Are you gonna cry? Aw.
1366
00:55:51,641 --> 00:55:53,935
Did Mommy and Daddy
leave you alone on Christmas?
1367
00:55:54,102 --> 00:55:55,812
Oh, shit!
1368
00:55:55,979 --> 00:55:59,190
That's for disrespecting
the spirit of Christmas!
1369
00:56:02,610 --> 00:56:03,611
Oh, fuck.
1370
00:56:05,113 --> 00:56:07,532
MAN 2: Whoa, whoa, whoa.
ETHAN: Fuck you!
1371
00:56:07,699 --> 00:56:09,784
MAN 2: Man, this really feels like
it's about something else here.
1372
00:56:09,951 --> 00:56:12,412
ETHAN: It's about this and only this!
Nothing else!
1373
00:56:12,579 --> 00:56:14,414
I think you're sublimating, man.
1374
00:56:14,581 --> 00:56:16,624
I do not wanna hurt you, man.
1375
00:56:16,791 --> 00:56:18,791
No, no, no. I wanna hurt him.
He sucker-punched me.
1376
00:56:20,462 --> 00:56:21,504
[LAUGHS]
1377
00:56:21,713 --> 00:56:23,214
You fucking frat boys.
1378
00:56:23,381 --> 00:56:25,133
I'm an orthopedic surgeon.
1379
00:56:25,300 --> 00:56:27,177
I teach third grade, bitch!
1380
00:56:27,343 --> 00:56:30,555
I shape our nation's youth!
1381
00:56:30,722 --> 00:56:32,307
MAN 2:
What is with this holiday?
1382
00:56:32,474 --> 00:56:34,392
It just fucks with people's heads.
1383
00:56:34,601 --> 00:56:36,269
[GROANING]
1384
00:56:37,062 --> 00:56:38,688
This needs to be important to you.
1385
00:56:38,855 --> 00:56:40,648
- It's ringing.
- Okay.
1386
00:56:40,857 --> 00:56:42,317
[CELL PHONE RINGING]
1387
00:56:47,072 --> 00:56:48,073
Hey.
1388
00:56:48,239 --> 00:56:49,908
Hey! Hi!
1389
00:56:50,075 --> 00:56:53,912
Uh, does Isaac have Sarah's phone
by any chance?
1390
00:56:54,079 --> 00:56:55,997
Yeah, he has it.
1391
00:56:56,831 --> 00:56:57,957
- He has it.
- Thank God.
1392
00:56:58,124 --> 00:56:59,125
DIANA:
So relax.
1393
00:56:59,292 --> 00:57:01,461
There is some very sensitive information
on there.
1394
00:57:01,628 --> 00:57:03,963
It's incredibly sensitive.
Wow, what's on the phone?
1395
00:57:04,130 --> 00:57:05,215
You don't need to know.
1396
00:57:05,381 --> 00:57:08,259
How's the party, huh? Is it as dumb
as you thought it'd be?
1397
00:57:08,426 --> 00:57:10,845
Actually, it's kind of amazing.
It's really fun...
1398
00:57:11,012 --> 00:57:13,681
...and you should get here. Quickly.
1399
00:57:13,848 --> 00:57:14,891
What? Huh?
1400
00:57:15,058 --> 00:57:16,267
Really?
1401
00:57:16,434 --> 00:57:18,978
You want me to come there?
To see you?
1402
00:57:19,145 --> 00:57:21,231
That's what I'm saying.
Come on!
1403
00:57:21,397 --> 00:57:22,899
Do you like him again?
1404
00:57:23,066 --> 00:57:24,234
Can we not have that conversation...
1405
00:57:24,400 --> 00:57:25,720
- ...right now?
- I'm just saying.
1406
00:57:25,860 --> 00:57:26,986
Okay.
1407
00:57:27,153 --> 00:57:28,738
Okay. We'll see you soon.
1408
00:57:32,492 --> 00:57:34,994
ALL:
Give us this day our daily bread
1409
00:57:35,161 --> 00:57:37,205
And forgive us our trespasses
1410
00:57:37,413 --> 00:57:39,207
[SPEAKS IN HEBREW]
1411
00:57:39,415 --> 00:57:40,625
BETSY:
Shh, shh, shh.
1412
00:57:40,834 --> 00:57:42,674
- I'm praying.
- I think that's a Jewish thing.
1413
00:57:42,836 --> 00:57:44,295
- I can't do that here?
- No.
1414
00:57:44,462 --> 00:57:45,964
- It's the same God.
- Uh-uh.
1415
00:57:46,297 --> 00:57:47,757
ISAAC:
I did it.
1416
00:57:48,133 --> 00:57:49,259
What's everyone doing?
1417
00:57:49,425 --> 00:57:50,844
Sit. Sit.
1418
00:57:51,010 --> 00:57:52,178
Sit down.
1419
00:57:53,138 --> 00:57:54,514
[BETSY CLEARS THROAT]
1420
00:57:54,722 --> 00:57:56,891
- This is so cool.
- Shh, whisper.
1421
00:57:57,058 --> 00:57:59,269
- Are we supposed to participate?
- No.
1422
00:57:59,435 --> 00:58:00,520
Hallelu!
1423
00:58:00,687 --> 00:58:02,188
No. Not that kind of church.
1424
00:58:02,355 --> 00:58:03,439
No?
1425
00:58:03,606 --> 00:58:05,733
You're my rock, right?
Can you be my rock?
1426
00:58:05,900 --> 00:58:07,569
Because you're acting
like a weird pebble.
1427
00:58:07,735 --> 00:58:08,987
Okay. I think I'm good.
1428
00:58:09,154 --> 00:58:10,280
Be a rock.
1429
00:58:11,698 --> 00:58:14,576
[PRIEST SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]
1430
00:58:21,082 --> 00:58:23,042
Fuck you.
1431
00:58:23,376 --> 00:58:25,211
What's up
with this fucking kid over here?
1432
00:58:25,378 --> 00:58:26,588
BETSY:
What?
1433
00:58:26,754 --> 00:58:27,839
What's this kid doing?
1434
00:58:29,424 --> 00:58:31,134
Look over there.
1435
00:58:31,301 --> 00:58:33,761
Look away, dude. Look away.
1436
00:58:33,928 --> 00:58:35,930
- Hsss!
BETSY: Stop.
1437
00:58:36,097 --> 00:58:37,515
Please don't hiss at a kid.
1438
00:58:37,682 --> 00:58:38,683
He's fucking with me.
1439
00:58:38,850 --> 00:58:40,490
I don't think he's talking to you at all.
1440
00:58:40,518 --> 00:58:41,561
[GASPS]
1441
00:58:41,978 --> 00:58:43,146
ISAAC:
Who's that guy?
1442
00:58:43,313 --> 00:58:44,314
What guy?
1443
00:58:44,480 --> 00:58:45,720
- The guy on the cross.
- Jesus.
1444
00:58:45,815 --> 00:58:47,233
- Oh, Jesus.
- Stop it.
1445
00:58:47,400 --> 00:58:48,401
Oh, Jesus Christ.
1446
00:58:48,568 --> 00:58:49,819
- Is that what they think we did to him?
- Yeah.
1447
00:58:49,986 --> 00:58:51,266
- Can you tell I'm Jewish?
- Yes.
1448
00:58:51,362 --> 00:58:52,739
- How?
- Your fucking sweater.
1449
00:58:52,947 --> 00:58:53,948
[GASPS]
1450
00:58:54,157 --> 00:58:55,950
- I'm sorry.
- Isaac, stop talking.
1451
00:58:56,117 --> 00:58:58,494
♪ O Holy Night ♪♪
1452
00:58:58,703 --> 00:58:59,704
[RETCHING]
1453
00:58:59,913 --> 00:59:04,167
Isaac, what are you doing?
Don't throw up. Don't you throw up here.
1454
00:59:04,334 --> 00:59:05,960
Swallow it like a girl would.
1455
00:59:06,127 --> 00:59:07,587
Swallow it.
1456
00:59:07,754 --> 00:59:10,006
Did you do it?
Let me see your mouth.
1457
00:59:10,173 --> 00:59:11,591
- Ugh.
- Don't throw up on me.
1458
00:59:11,758 --> 00:59:14,177
ISAAC: Where's the barf bag?
- There's no barf bags.
1459
00:59:14,344 --> 00:59:16,429
Stop it! No, stop it, Isaac!
1460
00:59:19,974 --> 00:59:21,601
[CROWD GASPS]
1461
00:59:21,809 --> 00:59:23,811
ISAAC:
Jesus fucking Christ.
1462
00:59:24,020 --> 00:59:25,396
[ISAAC RETCHES]
1463
00:59:25,897 --> 00:59:27,899
- He just threw up.
- Yeah.
1464
00:59:28,816 --> 00:59:31,861
ISAAC:
Oh, Jesus, fuck me. Oh...
1465
00:59:32,946 --> 00:59:35,865
- Is it still happening?
- It's still happening a little.
1466
00:59:38,034 --> 00:59:39,577
[GROANS]
1467
00:59:40,203 --> 00:59:42,413
We did not kill Jesus!
1468
00:59:42,580 --> 00:59:44,582
We did not do that!
1469
00:59:45,959 --> 00:59:48,002
[♪♪♪]
1470
00:59:55,468 --> 00:59:56,803
Give me my weed, you Grinch!
1471
01:00:00,723 --> 01:00:02,100
Shit!
1472
01:00:08,815 --> 01:00:09,899
Come on!
1473
01:00:21,828 --> 01:00:22,996
[RAT SQUEALING]
1474
01:00:24,455 --> 01:00:26,207
[SCREAMING]
1475
01:00:27,834 --> 01:00:29,127
Fuck!
1476
01:00:32,547 --> 01:00:33,673
What the fuck are you doing?
1477
01:00:33,840 --> 01:00:35,258
No, what are you doing, man?
1478
01:00:35,425 --> 01:00:37,510
You have friends who want to
spend the holidays with you.
1479
01:00:37,677 --> 01:00:39,137
You're lucky you have that.
1480
01:00:39,304 --> 01:00:41,931
You need to appreciate that
before you lose them.
1481
01:00:42,098 --> 01:00:44,538
That's your Christmas lesson.
That's why I'm taking this shit.
1482
01:00:45,768 --> 01:00:47,770
My boy Hans Gruber died like this.
1483
01:00:50,106 --> 01:00:51,357
CHRIS:
No!
1484
01:01:12,712 --> 01:01:14,464
What the hell?
1485
01:01:16,632 --> 01:01:17,967
- Help.
CHRIS: Isaac.
1486
01:01:18,134 --> 01:01:19,494
- What you doing, man?
- Thank God.
1487
01:01:19,594 --> 01:01:21,929
Dude, we've got to get to this party
or I'm gonna get fucking divorced.
1488
01:01:22,096 --> 01:01:23,765
Help me. How does this thing work?
1489
01:01:23,931 --> 01:01:25,433
You got to use your MetroCard.
Go this way.
1490
01:01:25,600 --> 01:01:27,393
ISAAC: Do it, do it, do it.
- Wait.
1491
01:01:27,560 --> 01:01:29,145
All right. Go.
1492
01:01:30,396 --> 01:01:31,731
ISAAC:
Did you get the weed back?
1493
01:01:31,898 --> 01:01:33,274
CHRIS: Shit got weird.
I don't wanna talk about it.
1494
01:01:33,441 --> 01:01:34,859
Did you get your phone back?
1495
01:01:35,026 --> 01:01:37,320
No. Not at all. That's a long story.
Look. Hey.
1496
01:01:37,487 --> 01:01:39,113
CHRIS: Oh, shit! What the fuck
happened to you?
1497
01:01:39,280 --> 01:01:41,032
I got beat up
by a couple of Santa Clauses.
1498
01:01:41,199 --> 01:01:42,909
You got beat up?
1499
01:01:43,076 --> 01:01:45,411
Fuck. When?
1500
01:01:45,578 --> 01:01:48,998
When? You know, a little bit
after you guys ran off without me.
1501
01:01:49,165 --> 01:01:50,416
But why did they beat you up?
1502
01:01:50,583 --> 01:01:51,584
I don't know why they beat me up!
1503
01:01:51,751 --> 01:01:53,002
Did they mug you?
Did they take the tickets?
1504
01:01:53,169 --> 01:01:54,809
No, they didn't take the fucking tickets!
1505
01:01:54,837 --> 01:01:56,130
Then why would they do it?
1506
01:01:56,297 --> 01:01:57,340
I don't know.
1507
01:01:57,507 --> 01:01:59,967
You don't know?
Did they say anything?
1508
01:02:00,134 --> 01:02:01,803
They're just
a couple of drunk assholes!
1509
01:02:01,969 --> 01:02:04,555
Look, it wouldn't have happened
if you guys didn't bail on me.
1510
01:02:05,598 --> 01:02:06,724
CHRIS:
What the fuck is that?
1511
01:02:06,891 --> 01:02:09,143
ISAAC: Don't do this now.
Please don't do this now!
1512
01:02:09,310 --> 01:02:10,937
So what's up with you, man?
Why are you mad at us?
1513
01:02:11,104 --> 01:02:13,606
Why you blame everything bad
that happens to you on us?
1514
01:02:13,773 --> 01:02:15,858
I'm just saying this is the
last chance we get to do this...
1515
01:02:16,025 --> 01:02:17,235
...and you guys are so wrapped up
in your own shit...
1516
01:02:17,402 --> 01:02:18,403
...you don't really care about Christmas.
1517
01:02:18,569 --> 01:02:19,821
What does that even mean?
1518
01:02:19,987 --> 01:02:21,906
When was the last time
you checked your phone, Chris?
1519
01:02:22,073 --> 01:02:23,908
Are you sure
one of your famous friends...
1520
01:02:24,075 --> 01:02:25,952
...isn't trying to get a hold of you
asking you to fetch him something?
1521
01:02:26,119 --> 01:02:27,995
You used to hate guys like that.
1522
01:02:28,162 --> 01:02:31,499
I get it. I get some success.
I get some new friends and you're jealous.
1523
01:02:31,666 --> 01:02:33,918
Look at you. So you're a success?
1524
01:02:34,085 --> 01:02:35,545
You want to talk about
your new found success?
1525
01:02:35,711 --> 01:02:36,911
I don't need to talk about it.
1526
01:02:36,963 --> 01:02:38,506
You don't think your two best friends
see through that shit?
1527
01:02:38,673 --> 01:02:40,967
See through what? Let's talk about it.
What do you see, Isaac?
1528
01:02:41,134 --> 01:02:42,260
I don't see anything.
I don't see through anything.
1529
01:02:42,427 --> 01:02:44,011
You're 34 years old.
1530
01:02:44,178 --> 01:02:46,139
Most professional athletes
retire right now...
1531
01:02:46,305 --> 01:02:48,182
...but you just got good. How is that?
1532
01:02:48,349 --> 01:02:49,350
Practice.
1533
01:02:49,517 --> 01:02:51,602
I told you. It was a new diet.
A new regimen.
1534
01:02:51,769 --> 01:02:54,230
A new regimen?
That's what you call it?
1535
01:02:54,397 --> 01:02:55,982
Yeah, that's what I call it.
What you call it?
1536
01:02:56,149 --> 01:02:58,910
I think I call it putting a needle
in your ass. That's what I call it.
1537
01:02:59,068 --> 01:03:00,945
Okay. Fine.
1538
01:03:01,112 --> 01:03:02,864
I'm on steroids, now what?
1539
01:03:03,281 --> 01:03:05,658
Newsflash: Everybody's on steroids!
1540
01:03:05,825 --> 01:03:06,826
You're a cheater.
1541
01:03:06,993 --> 01:03:08,633
At least
I'm doing something with my life.
1542
01:03:08,786 --> 01:03:11,456
What about you? Sitting around
wasting your fucking life away.
1543
01:03:11,622 --> 01:03:13,416
No girlfriend, no money.
1544
01:03:13,583 --> 01:03:17,628
Dude, you make music
that people have never heard.
1545
01:03:17,795 --> 01:03:19,046
It's the saddest shit
I've ever seen in my life!
1546
01:03:19,213 --> 01:03:20,423
Are you fucking serious right now?
1547
01:03:20,590 --> 01:03:22,758
Yeah! You need to get your
fucking life together. Tell him, Isaac.
1548
01:03:22,925 --> 01:03:25,344
You shut up! You're ruining my trip!
1549
01:03:25,511 --> 01:03:27,054
It's really fucked up.
1550
01:03:27,221 --> 01:03:30,099
Fuck this!
Going to the best party of my life...
1551
01:03:30,266 --> 01:03:34,770
...and I'm not wearing some pseudo-racist,
fake-ass acrylic sweater!
1552
01:03:34,937 --> 01:03:37,297
- Don't take off that sweater!
- I'm taking the sweater off!
1553
01:03:37,440 --> 01:03:39,442
- Don't take off the sweater.
- Put the fucking sweater back on!
1554
01:03:39,609 --> 01:03:41,009
I'm taking the fucking sweater off!
1555
01:03:42,695 --> 01:03:43,946
Stupid.
1556
01:03:45,072 --> 01:03:47,658
[♪♪♪]
1557
01:04:02,507 --> 01:04:05,760
[♪♪♪]
1558
01:04:09,555 --> 01:04:11,224
[DOOR CHIMING]
1559
01:04:15,061 --> 01:04:16,562
May I help you?
1560
01:04:16,771 --> 01:04:18,064
Uh...
1561
01:04:18,272 --> 01:04:21,901
I have, uh, these tickets.
1562
01:04:34,038 --> 01:04:35,206
Come with me.
1563
01:04:42,964 --> 01:04:43,965
Come on.
1564
01:04:47,593 --> 01:04:48,678
Get in there.
1565
01:04:56,644 --> 01:04:57,979
[DOOR CLOSES]
1566
01:04:58,813 --> 01:05:00,022
[DOOR BUZZING]
1567
01:05:00,898 --> 01:05:03,651
[♪♪♪]
1568
01:05:18,499 --> 01:05:22,044
May I take your coats, gentlemen?
1569
01:05:42,440 --> 01:05:44,358
All aboard!
1570
01:05:45,026 --> 01:05:46,736
[TRAIN HORN TOOTING]
1571
01:05:48,613 --> 01:05:51,490
[♪♪♪]
1572
01:06:04,003 --> 01:06:07,632
[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING
OVER SPEAKERS]
1573
01:06:11,135 --> 01:06:13,304
[OVER SPEAKERS]
♪ Everybody get down ♪♪
1574
01:06:25,858 --> 01:06:27,610
I'm going to find Owens.
1575
01:06:28,611 --> 01:06:30,446
Gonna find my phone.
1576
01:06:32,114 --> 01:06:33,824
I'm gonna go find Diana.
1577
01:06:38,704 --> 01:06:41,791
Oh, shit, Messiah,
White Jesus in the building.
1578
01:06:41,957 --> 01:06:43,077
TOMMY:
C-Money in the hizzle.
1579
01:06:43,209 --> 01:06:44,251
CHRIS: Yo, man.
- I see you made it.
1580
01:06:44,418 --> 01:06:46,671
I wasn't able to get the weed, man.
Shit fell apart. You know what I mean?
1581
01:06:46,837 --> 01:06:48,673
I forgot I even asked you.
You want some weed?
1582
01:06:48,839 --> 01:06:50,549
Have some weed.
1583
01:06:50,716 --> 01:06:52,259
But... All right.
1584
01:06:52,968 --> 01:06:55,096
You got a whole fucking
dump truck of weed?
1585
01:06:55,262 --> 01:06:57,056
Dro fo' sho'. Ha-ha-ha.
1586
01:06:57,223 --> 01:06:59,558
- So this it, huh?
- Oh, this is it, baby.
1587
01:06:59,725 --> 01:07:01,644
The Nutcracker Ball!
1588
01:07:01,811 --> 01:07:03,396
ALL:
Yeah!
1589
01:07:04,397 --> 01:07:05,523
ISAAC:
Having an emergency!
1590
01:07:06,232 --> 01:07:08,651
- Oh, my God.
- Oh. Sarah!
1591
01:07:08,818 --> 01:07:10,111
Sarah!
1592
01:07:10,277 --> 01:07:11,821
SARAH:
Are you fucking kidding me?
1593
01:07:11,987 --> 01:07:13,347
Get off of me!
What the fuck, dude?
1594
01:07:13,406 --> 01:07:14,740
I'm sorry! I'm just happy!
1595
01:07:14,907 --> 01:07:17,827
- You're so fucking sweaty.
- I know. It's warm and I'm on Molly.
1596
01:07:17,993 --> 01:07:19,578
- Oh, my God! Is that my phone?
- It is. Do you have my phone?
1597
01:07:19,745 --> 01:07:21,706
- Take your piece-of-shit phone back.
- It's the same phone.
1598
01:07:21,872 --> 01:07:23,152
That's why we got them mixed up.
1599
01:07:23,207 --> 01:07:24,375
- But this has some serious shit on it.
- I know.
1600
01:07:24,542 --> 01:07:26,127
Wait. You didn't look at it, did you?
1601
01:07:26,293 --> 01:07:27,628
You didn't look at any shit on my phone,
did you?
1602
01:07:27,795 --> 01:07:28,796
- No.
- Good.
1603
01:07:28,963 --> 01:07:30,381
You didn't look at anything on my phone,
did you?
1604
01:07:30,548 --> 01:07:31,966
I just wanna tell you...
1605
01:07:32,967 --> 01:07:33,968
...good job.
1606
01:07:34,427 --> 01:07:35,845
You did fucking look at my phone.
1607
01:07:36,011 --> 01:07:37,930
I didn't want to.
The texts just were coming in.
1608
01:07:38,097 --> 01:07:39,217
What is the matter with you?
1609
01:07:39,265 --> 01:07:41,350
All these gorgeous dick pics.
A-plus dick pics.
1610
01:07:41,642 --> 01:07:43,144
- That's a boss hog.
- Wait a second, really?
1611
01:07:43,310 --> 01:07:45,187
That dick soft is like
two of my dicks hard.
1612
01:07:45,354 --> 01:07:47,314
Do you think, like, it would be...?
1613
01:07:47,481 --> 01:07:49,692
Do you think I could, like, handle it?
1614
01:07:49,859 --> 01:07:51,902
There was a moment where I thought
he was wanting me to handle it...
1615
01:07:52,069 --> 01:07:54,572
...and I had to wrap my head around it
for a second, and I thought to myself:
1616
01:07:54,739 --> 01:07:56,615
"You know what? You hunker down,
you could take that bad boy."
1617
01:07:56,782 --> 01:07:57,867
- Really?
- Yeah.
1618
01:07:58,033 --> 01:08:00,786
That guy James, whoever James is,
he's got a fantastic cock on him.
1619
01:08:00,953 --> 01:08:02,872
JAMES:
Yo! Did somebody say "cock"?
1620
01:08:03,038 --> 01:08:04,039
Ha-ha-ha. What's up?
1621
01:08:04,206 --> 01:08:05,332
- Hey.
- What are you guys talking about?
1622
01:08:05,499 --> 01:08:06,625
- Nothing.
- Hey, what's up, bro? I'm James.
1623
01:08:06,792 --> 01:08:08,794
- I'm Isaac.
- You don't need to meet him.
1624
01:08:08,961 --> 01:08:10,212
That's your dick.
1625
01:08:10,379 --> 01:08:12,256
- Oh, shit!
- I'm the guy who had the phone!
1626
01:08:12,423 --> 01:08:14,216
- You saw my dick?
- Did I ever! Oh, my God!
1627
01:08:14,383 --> 01:08:15,926
He almost sucked my dick.
1628
01:08:16,093 --> 01:08:17,386
I would have if I'd known
it was you, maybe.
1629
01:08:17,553 --> 01:08:19,096
Oh, shit! Are you guys a couple?
1630
01:08:19,263 --> 01:08:20,389
- No, no. We're friends.
- Am I the third wheel?
1631
01:08:20,556 --> 01:08:21,599
SARAH:
No, no. You're the first wheel.
1632
01:08:21,766 --> 01:08:23,642
- Am I the third wheel?
ISAAC: Not at all.
1633
01:08:23,809 --> 01:08:26,145
I was with two other guys
and now I'm in a fight...
1634
01:08:26,312 --> 01:08:27,938
Oh, really? Two other guys?
1635
01:08:28,105 --> 01:08:29,565
I'd love to hang out
with two other people.
1636
01:08:29,732 --> 01:08:31,025
Is that a challenge?
1637
01:08:31,192 --> 01:08:32,610
It might be! Yeah.
1638
01:08:32,777 --> 01:08:35,488
I don't know who I'm gonna start with,
but I know who I'm gonna end with.
1639
01:08:35,654 --> 01:08:37,198
Well, let's get started right now!
1640
01:08:37,364 --> 01:08:39,492
- You guys wanna dance?
- I would love to dance.
1641
01:08:39,658 --> 01:08:41,338
- I would love to dance.
- You wanna dance?
1642
01:08:41,494 --> 01:08:42,953
Let's do it! Come on, Isaac!
1643
01:08:43,120 --> 01:08:45,122
Oh, my God. This is so nice!
This is the best!
1644
01:08:45,289 --> 01:08:46,332
What a turn of events!
1645
01:08:46,499 --> 01:08:47,500
What?
1646
01:08:47,666 --> 01:08:49,543
[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING
OVER SPEAKERS]
1647
01:08:59,970 --> 01:09:02,389
Holy fucking shit!
1648
01:09:11,315 --> 01:09:12,608
You're Miley Cyrus.
1649
01:09:12,900 --> 01:09:13,901
Yeah.
1650
01:09:14,068 --> 01:09:15,236
No, you don't understand.
1651
01:09:15,402 --> 01:09:18,697
I was just looking for this girl
that I love, and she loves you.
1652
01:09:18,864 --> 01:09:21,584
Oh, God, no. I did that with two fans
one time. It got super awkward.
1653
01:09:21,659 --> 01:09:24,078
That's not what I meant. Sorry, you don't
understand. That'd be awesome...
1654
01:09:24,245 --> 01:09:25,579
But, no, I just mean...
1655
01:09:26,956 --> 01:09:30,209
This has gotta be some kind of Christmas
miracle, because she talks about you...
1656
01:09:30,376 --> 01:09:32,336
...and your song a lot.
1657
01:09:32,503 --> 01:09:36,590
And I love this girl. I'm starting to
realize, tonight, she's the love of my life.
1658
01:09:36,757 --> 01:09:39,718
And I wanted tonight to be sort of
a special night for me and her.
1659
01:09:39,927 --> 01:09:42,930
- Now you're here and...
- You want to propose tonight?
1660
01:09:43,097 --> 01:09:46,225
Oh, my God! That is so romantic.
That is the sweetest thing I've ever heard.
1661
01:09:46,392 --> 01:09:48,727
I mean, I was just thinking you could
like dedicate a song to her.
1662
01:09:48,894 --> 01:09:51,355
What? You gotta propose.
1663
01:09:51,522 --> 01:09:54,608
Come on! It's Christmas.
It's like, go big or go fucking home!
1664
01:09:54,775 --> 01:09:57,069
I mean, you love this girl.
You say you love her, right?
1665
01:09:57,236 --> 01:10:00,447
Yeah. But I don't know
if tonight's the right time for...
1666
01:10:00,614 --> 01:10:03,367
Oh, God. Are you one of those guys
that are always making up excuses?
1667
01:10:03,534 --> 01:10:04,952
I fucking hate those kind of guys.
1668
01:10:05,119 --> 01:10:06,453
No, Miley Cyrus,
I'm not one of those guys.
1669
01:10:06,620 --> 01:10:09,164
All right, then don't be a pussy!
You got to propose to her!
1670
01:10:09,331 --> 01:10:12,543
There's all this magic in the air,
people want to fall in love.
1671
01:10:13,252 --> 01:10:15,713
Okay. Okay. Then I will.
1672
01:10:15,880 --> 01:10:17,506
This is a sign if I've ever seen a sign.
1673
01:10:17,673 --> 01:10:20,175
- It's gonna be fucking awesome.
- I'm gonna propose!
1674
01:10:20,342 --> 01:10:21,719
Yeah, you're gonna propose.
And I'm gonna help you out.
1675
01:10:21,886 --> 01:10:24,680
We're gonna propose!
Oh, my God! We're gonna propose!
1676
01:10:24,847 --> 01:10:26,891
- We're gonna propose! Okay!
- Uh-huh.
1677
01:10:27,057 --> 01:10:29,777
Miley Cyrus, this is the nicest thing
that anyone's ever done for me!
1678
01:10:29,894 --> 01:10:31,645
You gotta stop calling me Miley Cyrus.
1679
01:10:31,812 --> 01:10:33,731
- What should I call you?
- Hannah.
1680
01:10:34,690 --> 01:10:36,734
Just kidding. I'm drunk.
Let's do this thing!
1681
01:10:36,901 --> 01:10:38,736
- What's up, man?
- Hey, Chris.
1682
01:10:38,903 --> 01:10:40,988
- Yeah, what up, boy?
- Hey, what's up, K?
1683
01:10:41,155 --> 01:10:43,449
Hey, Reverend Run, man.
It's your boy, Reverend Run.
1684
01:10:43,616 --> 01:10:45,117
What that supposed to mean?
1685
01:10:45,284 --> 01:10:47,703
Hey, Messiah.
Check this shit out, dude.
1686
01:10:48,287 --> 01:10:50,915
TOMMY: Oh, shit. Is that you?
KAMAL: The fuck is that?
1687
01:10:51,081 --> 01:10:52,666
Nah, it was a Make-A-Wish thing,
man.
1688
01:10:52,833 --> 01:10:56,378
Those two kids have Crohn's disease.
It was their wish to do karaoke with me.
1689
01:10:56,545 --> 01:10:59,256
Man, damn dog,
you look just as white as they do.
1690
01:10:59,423 --> 01:11:01,634
- Yeah, which one are you?
KAMAL: Look at that sweater!
1691
01:11:01,800 --> 01:11:03,552
[ALL LAUGHING]
1692
01:11:04,637 --> 01:11:07,723
JAMES:
I got you! I got you! I got you!
1693
01:11:07,890 --> 01:11:09,141
Oh, man!
1694
01:11:09,308 --> 01:11:10,768
- Yeah!
ISAAC: Yeah.
1695
01:11:10,935 --> 01:11:12,561
JAMES: You're a great dancer, man.
- Oh, thanks, dude.
1696
01:11:12,728 --> 01:11:15,397
Appreciate it. I'm pretty high
on Molly right now.
1697
01:11:15,564 --> 01:11:17,691
I'm high too. I'm high too.
1698
01:11:17,858 --> 01:11:19,985
- I am digging this beard.
ISAAC: Thanks, man.
1699
01:11:20,152 --> 01:11:22,446
- Yo, carpet match the drapes?
- Yeah, I got a big bush.
1700
01:11:22,613 --> 01:11:25,324
JAMES: Ha-ha-ha.
- My carpet matches my drapes.
1701
01:11:25,491 --> 01:11:29,203
Yeah. Look at this guy!
He's furry all over! Ha-ha.
1702
01:11:29,411 --> 01:11:30,996
ISAAC:
Whoo! Nice!
1703
01:11:31,163 --> 01:11:33,843
You need to get the fuck out of here.
You're being a huge Cockblock.
1704
01:11:33,874 --> 01:11:35,000
I'm not being a Cockblock.
1705
01:11:35,167 --> 01:11:36,377
- Yes, you are!
- What the fuck are you talking about?
1706
01:11:36,543 --> 01:11:39,823
I don't think I could block this guy's cock.
It'd take ten men to block that thing.
1707
01:11:41,548 --> 01:11:42,841
[ALL CHEERING]
1708
01:11:43,050 --> 01:11:45,928
MILEY: Merry Christmas, New York City!
- Oh, no. Miley's here?
1709
01:11:46,095 --> 01:11:47,638
Miley Cyrus?
1710
01:11:48,263 --> 01:11:52,184
♪ We clawed, we chained
Our hearts in vain ♪
1711
01:11:52,351 --> 01:11:53,936
♪ We jumped ♪
1712
01:11:54,103 --> 01:11:55,980
♪ Never asking why ♪
1713
01:11:56,146 --> 01:11:58,148
- This is great!
- This is so cool.
1714
01:11:58,315 --> 01:12:00,067
Where's Diana?
This is, like, our song.
1715
01:12:00,651 --> 01:12:04,279
♪ A love no one could deny ♪
1716
01:12:04,446 --> 01:12:06,246
All right, everybody,
give it up to my friend.
1717
01:12:06,365 --> 01:12:07,685
What the fuck is your name again?
1718
01:12:07,741 --> 01:12:08,742
- Ethan.
- Ethan!
1719
01:12:09,660 --> 01:12:10,953
[CROWD CHEERING]
1720
01:12:13,664 --> 01:12:17,543
♪ Don't you ever say
I just walked away ♪
1721
01:12:17,710 --> 01:12:20,963
♪ I will always want you ♪
1722
01:12:22,047 --> 01:12:23,966
♪ I forgot these words ♪
1723
01:12:24,133 --> 01:12:25,676
♪ Doesn't matter though ♪
1724
01:12:26,301 --> 01:12:30,180
♪ I will always want you ♪
1725
01:12:31,181 --> 01:12:35,602
♪ I came in like a wrecking ball ♪
1726
01:12:35,769 --> 01:12:39,189
♪ I never hit so hard in love ♪
1727
01:12:39,356 --> 01:12:43,110
♪ All I wanted
Was to break your walls ♪
1728
01:12:43,485 --> 01:12:47,906
♪ All you ever did was wreck me ♪
1729
01:12:48,449 --> 01:12:49,783
♪ Yeah, you ♪
1730
01:12:49,950 --> 01:12:51,660
♪ You wreck me ♪
1731
01:12:51,827 --> 01:12:53,495
DIANA:
Yeah!
1732
01:12:54,955 --> 01:12:56,040
Diana...
1733
01:12:58,417 --> 01:12:59,710
Yo, dude, can you move?
1734
01:12:59,877 --> 01:13:02,588
In the red. Move.
Yeah, thanks.
1735
01:13:03,547 --> 01:13:04,548
Diana...
1736
01:13:05,632 --> 01:13:08,719
...listen, I know we're not really even
going out anymore...
1737
01:13:08,886 --> 01:13:11,013
...and that's because I wouldn't commit.
1738
01:13:11,180 --> 01:13:13,348
- This is crazy.
- But I'm ready to commit. Hard.
1739
01:13:13,515 --> 01:13:15,976
♪ I'm ready to commit ♪
1740
01:13:16,518 --> 01:13:18,062
Hard like a wrecking ball.
1741
01:13:19,730 --> 01:13:21,890
You're the best thing
that's ever happened to me, girl.
1742
01:13:22,691 --> 01:13:25,486
You make me laugh. You're cool as hell.
You don't take any shit.
1743
01:13:26,153 --> 01:13:27,404
♪ None of his shit ♪
1744
01:13:27,571 --> 01:13:28,572
You're smarter than I am.
1745
01:13:28,739 --> 01:13:31,219
- You're probably better than I deserve.
- This is so romantic.
1746
01:13:31,700 --> 01:13:32,993
ETHAN: But go big or go home.
Right, Miley?
1747
01:13:33,160 --> 01:13:34,328
No, E.
1748
01:13:34,495 --> 01:13:37,998
♪ Go big or go home ♪
1749
01:13:38,332 --> 01:13:41,668
When I let you go,
that was just me fucking up...
1750
01:13:41,835 --> 01:13:44,088
...but I don't wanna ever let you go again.
Not now, not ever.
1751
01:13:44,254 --> 01:13:46,381
And definitely not
on fucking Christmas!
1752
01:13:46,548 --> 01:13:48,926
♪ On fucking Christmas ♪
1753
01:13:49,093 --> 01:13:50,677
So this is it, Diana.
1754
01:13:50,844 --> 01:13:53,222
- Only live once, bro!
- Stop encouraging him, James.
1755
01:13:54,348 --> 01:13:55,599
Will you marry me?
1756
01:13:55,808 --> 01:13:57,392
CROWD:
Aw.
1757
01:13:57,851 --> 01:13:59,895
WOMAN:
Say yes. Yes.
1758
01:14:00,687 --> 01:14:04,024
[♪♪♪]
1759
01:14:05,234 --> 01:14:07,402
- Yes.
- Yeah!
1760
01:14:07,820 --> 01:14:09,488
- Fuck!
- Yes!
1761
01:14:10,155 --> 01:14:14,076
MILEY:
♪ I came in like a wrecking ball ♪
1762
01:14:14,243 --> 01:14:17,287
♪ I never hit so hard in love ♪
1763
01:14:18,122 --> 01:14:22,000
♪ All I wanted
Was to break your walls ♪
1764
01:14:22,167 --> 01:14:26,171
♪ All you ever did was wreck me ♪
1765
01:14:26,713 --> 01:14:28,257
♪ I came in like a wrecking ball ♪
1766
01:14:28,423 --> 01:14:30,968
Okay, I gotta go find my friend real fast.
Excuse me.
1767
01:14:31,135 --> 01:14:35,931
♪ I just closed my eyes and swung
Left me crashing in a blazing fall ♪
1768
01:14:36,098 --> 01:14:37,975
I'm gonna be right back.
1769
01:14:38,142 --> 01:14:39,393
Y'all stay black.
1770
01:14:39,768 --> 01:14:41,103
- Hey.
- Yeah?
1771
01:14:41,270 --> 01:14:43,230
All this romance
is getting me really hot.
1772
01:14:43,397 --> 01:14:44,565
You wanna go back to the hotel room?
1773
01:14:44,731 --> 01:14:46,400
Hey, I feel like you might be gay.
1774
01:14:47,234 --> 01:14:49,319
- Not right now, I'm not.
- Okay.
1775
01:14:49,486 --> 01:14:50,821
- All right.
- Okay.
1776
01:14:51,155 --> 01:14:52,781
Oh, my fucking God! Oh, my God!
1777
01:14:52,948 --> 01:14:54,658
Oh, my God!
This is the greatest night of our lives!
1778
01:14:54,825 --> 01:14:56,827
- That was crazy.
- That's so crazy, right?
1779
01:14:56,994 --> 01:14:59,913
Listen, I'm sorry about the ring.
I'll get you a ring, I promise.
1780
01:15:00,080 --> 01:15:01,206
We can do that tomorrow.
1781
01:15:01,373 --> 01:15:03,208
No, Ethan, I'm not going to marry you.
1782
01:15:03,375 --> 01:15:04,501
What do you mean?
1783
01:15:04,668 --> 01:15:07,045
We're not even together.
1784
01:15:07,212 --> 01:15:09,252
I haven't even spoken to you in,
like, three months!
1785
01:15:09,381 --> 01:15:10,591
Yes, I addressed that in the speech.
1786
01:15:10,757 --> 01:15:12,801
I know, and then you show up here
and you propose to me...
1787
01:15:12,968 --> 01:15:14,845
...in front of hundreds and hundreds
of people.
1788
01:15:15,012 --> 01:15:16,013
That's crazy.
1789
01:15:16,180 --> 01:15:19,391
Wait, I'm sorry.
We're not getting married? This is a no?
1790
01:15:19,558 --> 01:15:21,977
No! It's a no! No!
1791
01:15:22,144 --> 01:15:25,689
I'm so sorry that you're clearly
going through a lot right now.
1792
01:15:25,856 --> 01:15:28,656
I'm sorry that your friends don't wanna
hang out with you on Christmas.
1793
01:15:28,734 --> 01:15:30,254
I understand that that's hard for you.
1794
01:15:30,360 --> 01:15:33,947
That is not a reason for you
to grab onto me like I'm your lifeline!
1795
01:15:35,407 --> 01:15:36,408
Why'd you say yes?
1796
01:15:37,284 --> 01:15:39,453
I said yes because
everybody was looking at me.
1797
01:15:39,620 --> 01:15:42,539
I said yes, because Miley clearly wanted
me to say yes!
1798
01:15:42,706 --> 01:15:45,083
And I didn't want Miley to think
that I hated love!
1799
01:15:46,710 --> 01:15:48,045
That's understandable.
1800
01:15:48,212 --> 01:15:50,005
I wouldn't want that either.
1801
01:15:50,839 --> 01:15:52,591
Okay, look, I...
1802
01:15:54,051 --> 01:15:56,731
I was really just trying to do what I
thought you wanted me to do...
1803
01:15:56,845 --> 01:15:58,680
...and that's because I love you.
1804
01:15:58,847 --> 01:16:00,182
It's been three months,
I haven't stopped.
1805
01:16:00,349 --> 01:16:01,600
I'm not gonna stop.
1806
01:16:02,100 --> 01:16:04,728
I'm not your answer...
1807
01:16:04,895 --> 01:16:06,647
...right now, Ethan.
1808
01:16:07,814 --> 01:16:10,025
Wait, wait. No, no.
Can we talk?
1809
01:16:17,324 --> 01:16:20,035
ISAAC:
Oh, my God! Hi!
1810
01:16:20,202 --> 01:16:21,286
- You're Tommy Owens!
- Yeah, yeah, thank you.
1811
01:16:21,453 --> 01:16:22,496
You're the Messiah!
1812
01:16:22,663 --> 01:16:25,383
You really are the Messiah!
You saved my fantasy team last year, bro!
1813
01:16:25,540 --> 01:16:27,000
- I'm a huge fan of yours.
- All right, that's good to know.
1814
01:16:27,167 --> 01:16:28,168
You have a good night.
1815
01:16:28,335 --> 01:16:29,336
- You're big in real life.
- Pleasure, man.
1816
01:16:29,503 --> 01:16:30,796
Look, can you help me out?
1817
01:16:30,963 --> 01:16:33,966
We have a friend in common. Chris.
1818
01:16:34,132 --> 01:16:36,176
- I'm looking for my buddy Ethan.
- Oh, shit.
1819
01:16:37,970 --> 01:16:40,180
MAN 1: Hey!
- I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
1820
01:16:40,347 --> 01:16:42,140
I'm sorry, I got it. I got it.
1821
01:16:42,349 --> 01:16:43,850
MAN 1:
Unh!
1822
01:16:45,060 --> 01:16:46,228
ISAAC:
Oh, no.
1823
01:16:46,395 --> 01:16:47,813
- I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
TOMMY: Are you okay?
1824
01:16:47,980 --> 01:16:49,731
Hey, it's glass, man.
Why you picking it up?
1825
01:16:49,898 --> 01:16:51,218
I'm just trying to help out, man.
1826
01:16:51,316 --> 01:16:53,193
MAN 2: Come on.
ISAAC: Oh, shit!
1827
01:16:54,528 --> 01:16:55,529
[SCREAMS]
1828
01:16:55,737 --> 01:16:56,905
Holy shit!
1829
01:16:57,489 --> 01:16:58,532
I'm sorry!
1830
01:16:58,699 --> 01:17:01,576
TOMMY: Ah!
- The Jewish guy crucified the Messiah!
1831
01:17:01,743 --> 01:17:04,288
TOMMY:
It was rabbi-dancing motherfucker!
1832
01:17:04,454 --> 01:17:08,166
- Ah!
- It's happening again.
1833
01:17:09,584 --> 01:17:12,671
CHRIS:
Ethan! Ethan! Diana!
1834
01:17:13,630 --> 01:17:14,798
Congratulations!
1835
01:17:14,965 --> 01:17:17,551
- No! Stop congratulating me!
- What? What happened?
1836
01:17:17,718 --> 01:17:19,636
Just go talk to Ethan.
1837
01:17:19,803 --> 01:17:21,096
Shit.
1838
01:17:21,722 --> 01:17:24,933
ISAAC: I'm sorry! I'm sorry!
I think he's gonna be fine.
1839
01:17:25,100 --> 01:17:26,101
Please, punch him in the face!
1840
01:17:26,268 --> 01:17:28,395
I thought the Messiah
preached forgiveness!
1841
01:17:28,562 --> 01:17:30,522
Look at me, asshole.
What the fuck wrong with you?
1842
01:17:30,647 --> 01:17:33,567
- Who the fuck are you?
- Hey. He's my friend!
1843
01:17:33,734 --> 01:17:34,943
Back off, man!
1844
01:17:36,862 --> 01:17:38,572
Yo! Back the fuck up, all right?
1845
01:17:38,739 --> 01:17:41,241
Oh, shit just got real, huh?
Yeah, go ahead and punch him, man.
1846
01:17:41,783 --> 01:17:43,035
TMZ will love that shit.
1847
01:17:43,201 --> 01:17:45,329
I got the biggest motherfucking phone
on the planet.
1848
01:17:45,495 --> 01:17:48,081
And your ass will be trending
in 10 minutes.
1849
01:17:48,248 --> 01:17:50,876
Who in here follow Chrisrob11?
1850
01:17:51,043 --> 01:17:52,461
BARON:
Put your fucking hands down!
1851
01:17:52,627 --> 01:17:54,796
- His social media game is crazy!
- Crazy!
1852
01:17:54,963 --> 01:17:56,506
Run.
1853
01:17:56,882 --> 01:17:59,634
Go, go. Get out. No! No!
1854
01:18:00,510 --> 01:18:01,553
Yeah! Ha-ha.
1855
01:18:01,720 --> 01:18:04,765
CHRIS: No, no!
ISAAC: I'm a lawyer! I'm a lawyer!
1856
01:18:18,570 --> 01:18:22,240
GREEN: Magical night, isn't it?
- Jesus. You scared me.
1857
01:18:22,741 --> 01:18:24,368
Mr. Green.
1858
01:18:24,993 --> 01:18:26,411
Man, you're everywhere tonight.
1859
01:18:27,621 --> 01:18:29,915
I end every Christmas at this party.
1860
01:18:30,082 --> 01:18:31,500
What do you mean?
How do you get in?
1861
01:18:31,666 --> 01:18:32,959
It's my party.
1862
01:18:33,126 --> 01:18:34,127
What?
1863
01:18:34,586 --> 01:18:36,338
About 20 years ago...
1864
01:18:36,505 --> 01:18:38,673
...I read The Great Gatsby.
1865
01:18:39,383 --> 01:18:41,051
I love that book.
1866
01:18:41,218 --> 01:18:43,470
Movie's all right,
3D gives me a headache...
1867
01:18:43,637 --> 01:18:45,680
...but I'm a sucker for Leo.
1868
01:18:47,599 --> 01:18:48,934
So this guy...
1869
01:18:49,101 --> 01:18:52,145
...he throws all these parties
and nobody knows who he is.
1870
01:18:52,646 --> 01:18:55,315
I thought,
"Wow, that's pretty fucking cool."
1871
01:18:55,816 --> 01:18:58,735
My cousin Larry's got this
giant warehouse in Brooklyn...
1872
01:18:58,902 --> 01:19:02,531
...figured I'm working on Christmas
anyway, so I should do it too.
1873
01:19:02,697 --> 01:19:04,908
We started out pretty small.
1874
01:19:05,075 --> 01:19:07,869
Just a punch bowl
and some sleigh bells...
1875
01:19:08,036 --> 01:19:12,624
...and it gets bigger and bigger every year.
This year we added that train.
1876
01:19:12,791 --> 01:19:14,709
- Through the trippy tunnel of lights.
- Yeah.
1877
01:19:14,876 --> 01:19:16,753
- Cool way to enter a party, right?
- Yeah.
1878
01:19:18,213 --> 01:19:19,714
Hey, what'd you think of Miley?
1879
01:19:20,132 --> 01:19:22,426
Yeah, she was great.
She was great.
1880
01:19:24,344 --> 01:19:27,180
Ethan, you and I both know,
Miley was flawless.
1881
01:19:28,723 --> 01:19:30,559
Something's bugging you.
1882
01:19:34,187 --> 01:19:37,065
Your friends,
they ain't gonna leave you.
1883
01:19:37,691 --> 01:19:38,859
They need you, kid.
1884
01:19:39,443 --> 01:19:40,610
How do you know about that?
1885
01:19:42,070 --> 01:19:43,905
Smoke this.
1886
01:19:44,364 --> 01:19:47,409
Nah, I'm good, man.
Weed makes me paranoid now.
1887
01:19:47,742 --> 01:19:50,704
This is the staff of life.
1888
01:19:50,954 --> 01:19:52,622
Okay. Heh, heh, heh.
1889
01:19:52,789 --> 01:19:54,458
You're making me
a little uncomfortable.
1890
01:19:54,624 --> 01:19:58,462
I've been told my quiet intensity
has that effect on people.
1891
01:19:59,129 --> 01:20:00,881
But sometimes...
1892
01:20:01,047 --> 01:20:03,925
...being uncomfortable
can be a good thing.
1893
01:20:19,316 --> 01:20:21,776
Fuck it. Thanks.
1894
01:20:25,155 --> 01:20:27,741
[OVER SPEAKERS]
♪ Silent Night ♪
1895
01:20:27,949 --> 01:20:29,951
[KNOCKING ON DOOR]
1896
01:20:30,160 --> 01:20:31,995
♪ Holy Night ♪
1897
01:20:32,662 --> 01:20:36,041
♪ All is calm ♪
1898
01:20:38,084 --> 01:20:39,336
- Hey.
- Hey, man.
1899
01:20:39,503 --> 01:20:41,671
- Sup, dude?
- What are you guys doing here?
1900
01:20:41,838 --> 01:20:44,841
We just thought maybe
you'd wanna hang out.
1901
01:20:45,008 --> 01:20:46,760
Some company or something.
1902
01:20:46,927 --> 01:20:49,047
- Just say what's up.
ISAAC: Yeah, just say what's up.
1903
01:20:49,095 --> 01:20:50,472
ETHAN:
That's cool.
1904
01:20:50,639 --> 01:20:52,307
I'm packing all this shit up.
1905
01:20:52,474 --> 01:20:54,809
Old people have so much stuff.
You guys remember that.
1906
01:20:54,976 --> 01:20:56,978
You have to throw things away in life.
1907
01:20:57,145 --> 01:20:58,772
ISAAC:
For sure.
1908
01:21:01,358 --> 01:21:03,777
- Play some Nintendo?
- Yeah, N64?
1909
01:21:03,944 --> 01:21:06,238
I think I'm just gonna chill here.
1910
01:21:06,404 --> 01:21:09,741
I appreciate you guys coming over,
but I think I'm just gonna...
1911
01:21:09,908 --> 01:21:12,744
No, man. Fuck that, dude.
It's Christmas.
1912
01:21:12,911 --> 01:21:14,955
You can't be alone.
Let's hang out.
1913
01:21:17,332 --> 01:21:20,126
Go to my mom's house.
Play some "GoldenEye."
1914
01:21:20,293 --> 01:21:22,796
Come on. Look, I got some whiskey.
1915
01:21:22,963 --> 01:21:24,923
I stole some hash from my brother.
Rolled it in this doobie.
1916
01:21:25,090 --> 01:21:27,384
We get pretty fucked up. Heh, heh.
1917
01:21:30,345 --> 01:21:31,805
[ETHAN SOBBING]
1918
01:21:34,599 --> 01:21:35,725
I'm sorry.
1919
01:21:35,892 --> 01:21:37,727
- No. It's cool.
- It's all good.
1920
01:21:37,894 --> 01:21:39,563
It's okay, man.
1921
01:21:46,361 --> 01:21:47,988
I just miss them.
1922
01:21:49,155 --> 01:21:50,282
We miss them too.
1923
01:21:50,448 --> 01:21:51,950
Yeah, man.
1924
01:21:52,117 --> 01:21:53,827
But you know what?
1925
01:21:53,994 --> 01:21:55,996
We're your new family now.
1926
01:21:56,162 --> 01:21:58,081
I'll be your daddy,
Chris'll be your mommy.
1927
01:21:58,248 --> 01:21:59,928
No, I'm gonna be the daddy,
you be the mom.
1928
01:22:01,376 --> 01:22:02,669
You guys are good friends.
1929
01:22:02,836 --> 01:22:04,212
We'll be here
whenever you need us, man.
1930
01:22:04,379 --> 01:22:05,422
Always, man.
1931
01:22:05,589 --> 01:22:07,841
Yeah, always there for you, bro.
1932
01:22:10,760 --> 01:22:11,761
You can't smoke that in here.
1933
01:22:11,928 --> 01:22:13,388
You can't smoke that in here.
1934
01:22:13,555 --> 01:22:15,265
Figure we can now.
1935
01:22:16,850 --> 01:22:18,476
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
1936
01:22:18,643 --> 01:22:20,395
- Fuck, that's crazy.
CHRIS: What we hiding this for?
1937
01:22:20,562 --> 01:22:21,896
ISAAC:
Take a hit, dude.
1938
01:22:22,063 --> 01:22:23,440
A little bit for the homeys.
1939
01:22:23,607 --> 01:22:25,233
It's so cold outside too.
1940
01:22:25,817 --> 01:22:28,361
We should go to Christmas Tree
at Rockefeller Center.
1941
01:22:28,528 --> 01:22:30,614
CHRIS: Ho-ho. Yes.
- That's a good idea.
1942
01:22:30,780 --> 01:22:32,282
CHRIS:
Then we go to FAO Schwarz...
1943
01:22:32,449 --> 01:22:34,034
We dance on the piano!
1944
01:22:34,200 --> 01:22:36,202
- Like Tom Hanks in Big.
ETHAN: "Heart and Soul."
1945
01:22:36,369 --> 01:22:38,496
Then we eat Chinese food,
because I'm fucking high.
1946
01:22:38,663 --> 01:22:41,333
And then go to the karaoke spot
right by the Chinese food place.
1947
01:22:41,499 --> 01:22:43,752
ISAAC: That's a fucking good idea.
CHRIS: Heh, heh, heh.
1948
01:22:44,044 --> 01:22:45,670
It's a dope night.
1949
01:22:45,879 --> 01:22:50,425
♪ Sleep in heavenly peace ♪♪
1950
01:22:51,426 --> 01:22:52,427
[GREEN SOBS]
1951
01:22:52,594 --> 01:22:54,929
That was fucking touching, yo.
1952
01:22:56,222 --> 01:22:58,725
Those are some ride-or-die homeys
you got there.
1953
01:22:58,892 --> 01:23:00,894
Cherish that shit.
1954
01:23:02,145 --> 01:23:03,980
It's all different now.
1955
01:23:04,481 --> 01:23:06,149
Those guys don't need me anymore.
1956
01:23:06,608 --> 01:23:08,485
Oh, yeah? Listen.
1957
01:23:08,652 --> 01:23:11,071
ISAAC: We need him!
We're not leaving without him!
1958
01:23:11,237 --> 01:23:13,448
CHRIS: He's my best friend in the whole
world. I can't leave him here.
1959
01:23:13,615 --> 01:23:16,242
ISAAC: Don't let the red noses fool you,
these fuckers are tough.
1960
01:23:16,409 --> 01:23:18,036
What if I run in,
and you try to climb in a window?
1961
01:23:18,203 --> 01:23:20,083
Maybe if you boost me up
we can get around them.
1962
01:23:20,121 --> 01:23:21,665
No, I can't boost you,
you're too heavy, man.
1963
01:23:21,831 --> 01:23:24,151
ISAAC: We need our friend
and we'll never leave him behind!
1964
01:23:24,250 --> 01:23:26,836
- Hand him over, reindeer!
- Yo!
1965
01:23:27,003 --> 01:23:28,163
CHRIS:
I'll charge and you go.
1966
01:23:28,213 --> 01:23:29,381
ISAAC: There he is!
- Hey!
1967
01:23:29,547 --> 01:23:31,383
ISAAC: Thank God, we've been
looking everywhere for you!
1968
01:23:31,549 --> 01:23:32,869
CHRIS:
Rudolph is kicking our ass!
1969
01:23:33,009 --> 01:23:34,969
- I'm here!
ISAAC: Get down here so we can go!
1970
01:23:35,136 --> 01:23:36,137
Here I come!
1971
01:23:36,304 --> 01:23:38,264
CHRIS:
Come around!
1972
01:23:38,431 --> 01:23:41,059
- I'm fucking... I got your nose!
ISAAC: Yikes.
1973
01:23:41,226 --> 01:23:43,061
I got your nose, asshole!
1974
01:23:43,228 --> 01:23:45,647
How about that, Rudolph? Huh?
1975
01:23:47,440 --> 01:23:49,567
- Thanks, Mr. Green.
- You're welcome.
1976
01:23:52,278 --> 01:23:54,864
[♪♪♪]
1977
01:23:57,575 --> 01:23:59,285
CHRIS:
It was a pretty dumb thing you did.
1978
01:23:59,452 --> 01:24:01,037
ETHAN:
I know. I didn't think it through at all.
1979
01:24:01,204 --> 01:24:02,956
I just saw her at the bar and just...
1980
01:24:03,123 --> 01:24:05,625
I don't know man,
I really, really like this girl.
1981
01:24:05,792 --> 01:24:07,335
I can't help it.
1982
01:24:07,502 --> 01:24:11,131
I was scared of being alone
and did some stupid shit.
1983
01:24:11,840 --> 01:24:13,383
I think she just wanted you to do...
1984
01:24:13,550 --> 01:24:16,344
...some normal shit that boyfriends do
after two years of dating.
1985
01:24:16,511 --> 01:24:18,805
But I'm not normal. You know this.
I'm not normal.
1986
01:24:18,972 --> 01:24:21,182
Bunch of abnormal shit
happened to me.
1987
01:24:21,641 --> 01:24:24,227
Or, I don't know,
maybe that's just an excuse.
1988
01:24:25,937 --> 01:24:28,106
I guess I'm pretty good
at making excuses.
1989
01:24:28,273 --> 01:24:29,941
ISAAC: Yeah.
- All the time.
1990
01:24:30,108 --> 01:24:32,902
If you get paid for that
you'd be really successful.
1991
01:24:33,069 --> 01:24:34,237
Why didn't you tell me?
1992
01:24:34,404 --> 01:24:36,156
You know, it's hard to tell someone.
1993
01:24:36,322 --> 01:24:38,074
You have a good reason
to be making excuses.
1994
01:24:38,241 --> 01:24:39,681
It's just kind of ruining your life.
1995
01:24:44,164 --> 01:24:46,791
It's harder to stay friends
with people when you're older.
1996
01:24:46,958 --> 01:24:49,627
You have so much
of your own shit going on.
1997
01:24:49,794 --> 01:24:51,963
CHRIS:
We'll just have to try harder.
1998
01:24:52,130 --> 01:24:53,673
It's important, you know?
1999
01:24:54,007 --> 01:24:55,800
- Come on.
- Heh, heh, heh.
2000
01:24:55,967 --> 01:24:57,719
I really love you.
2001
01:24:57,886 --> 01:24:59,012
I love you a lot.
2002
01:24:59,179 --> 01:25:00,472
Thanks, man.
2003
01:25:00,680 --> 01:25:01,890
[PHONE CHIMES]
2004
01:25:02,557 --> 01:25:03,600
ISAAC:
Oh, no.
2005
01:25:04,768 --> 01:25:06,603
- Oh, no.
CHRIS: What's up?
2006
01:25:06,770 --> 01:25:07,771
I have 96 missed calls.
2007
01:25:07,937 --> 01:25:09,606
ETHAN: Ha-ha-ha.
CHRIS: Holy shit.
2008
01:25:09,773 --> 01:25:13,026
- Oh, no, Betsy's gone into labor, I bet.
- No.
2009
01:25:13,193 --> 01:25:16,073
Why the fuck would she call that
many times? Oh, no, she's calling again.
2010
01:25:16,613 --> 01:25:17,614
Hello?
2011
01:25:18,198 --> 01:25:20,784
Hello? Yes. All right.
2012
01:25:20,950 --> 01:25:23,369
All right. That's fine.
2013
01:25:23,536 --> 01:25:27,248
Uh, I will be right there.
As fast as I can. Don't worry.
2014
01:25:28,958 --> 01:25:30,627
Betsy's going into fucking labor.
2015
01:25:30,794 --> 01:25:33,421
- What?
- Ah!
2016
01:25:35,215 --> 01:25:37,008
Oh, no! Oh, no!
2017
01:25:37,175 --> 01:25:39,219
CHRIS: Come on!
ISAAC: Oh, no!
2018
01:25:40,428 --> 01:25:43,014
CHRIS: We'll never get a fucking cab
over here!
2019
01:25:43,181 --> 01:25:44,390
Wait, look!
2020
01:25:45,934 --> 01:25:48,520
It's Mr. Green's car!
It's a Christmas miracle!
2021
01:25:48,686 --> 01:25:50,146
- Isaac, can you drive?
- Yeah!
2022
01:25:50,313 --> 01:25:52,649
No, no, no, I'm kidding! I'll drive!
2023
01:25:52,857 --> 01:25:54,317
♪ Baby, please come home ♪
2024
01:25:54,526 --> 01:25:55,568
♪ Christmas ♪
2025
01:25:55,777 --> 01:25:57,904
♪ The church bells in town ♪
2026
01:25:58,112 --> 01:25:59,155
♪ Christmas ♪
2027
01:25:59,364 --> 01:26:01,866
♪ Are ringing a song ♪
2028
01:26:02,075 --> 01:26:04,702
I believe I finally earned these.
2029
01:26:04,911 --> 01:26:06,788
♪ What a happy sound ♪
2030
01:26:06,996 --> 01:26:09,624
♪ Baby, please come home ♪
2031
01:26:11,084 --> 01:26:13,004
- Come on. I got you. I got you.
ISAAC: Unh. Unh.
2032
01:26:13,086 --> 01:26:16,005
No, no, no. There you go.
There you go.
2033
01:26:17,882 --> 01:26:19,384
Get out of the way!
2034
01:26:19,551 --> 01:26:21,219
[HORN HONKING]
2035
01:26:21,386 --> 01:26:24,597
♪ And all the fun we had last year ♪
2036
01:26:24,806 --> 01:26:25,849
♪ Christmas ♪
2037
01:26:26,057 --> 01:26:27,976
♪ Pretty lights on the tree ♪
2038
01:26:28,184 --> 01:26:30,270
Where is she? Where is she?
2039
01:26:30,478 --> 01:26:32,397
♪ I'm watching them shine ♪♪
2040
01:26:33,314 --> 01:26:35,775
Cindy? Where is she?
Is everything okay?
2041
01:26:35,942 --> 01:26:37,694
It's okay. Nothing happened.
2042
01:26:37,861 --> 01:26:38,903
It was a false alarm.
2043
01:26:39,070 --> 01:26:40,572
Oh, God.
2044
01:26:40,738 --> 01:26:42,323
False alarm.
2045
01:26:42,699 --> 01:26:43,783
Betsy.
2046
01:26:43,950 --> 01:26:45,368
Thank God. I'm so sorry.
2047
01:26:45,535 --> 01:26:46,786
BETSY:
Where were you?
2048
01:26:46,953 --> 01:26:49,581
- I made a mistake. I made a huge mistake.
- I called you.
2049
01:26:49,747 --> 01:26:52,166
- I switched phones with Sarah.
- From work?
2050
01:26:52,333 --> 01:26:54,085
It's a long story.
2051
01:26:54,252 --> 01:26:56,796
It doesn't matter. I just need to
tell you something. Okay?
2052
01:26:56,963 --> 01:26:58,298
Okay.
2053
01:26:58,965 --> 01:27:00,466
I'm gonna come clean with you.
2054
01:27:00,633 --> 01:27:02,594
Those drugs you gave me...
2055
01:27:02,760 --> 01:27:04,762
...they sent me on a spirit quest.
2056
01:27:04,929 --> 01:27:07,974
You know, like a spirit quest
in an Oliver Stone movie or Young Guns.
2057
01:27:08,141 --> 01:27:10,643
And when that happened
I kind of realized...
2058
01:27:10,810 --> 01:27:14,230
...that maybe I've been lying to,
maybe, myself and you...
2059
01:27:14,397 --> 01:27:17,191
...about how I really feel
about some stuff.
2060
01:27:17,358 --> 01:27:18,518
I'm just gonna show you this.
2061
01:27:18,568 --> 01:27:21,112
- Just watch this.
- Okay.
2062
01:27:21,279 --> 01:27:23,573
ISAAC [ON VIDEO]: This baby is
a bad fucking call. I'm not ready for it!
2063
01:27:23,740 --> 01:27:26,326
We got to do this responsible thing
and I got to say...
2064
01:27:26,492 --> 01:27:28,369
...that we should
not be having this baby!
2065
01:27:28,536 --> 01:27:30,204
Get rid of this fucking baby!
2066
01:27:30,371 --> 01:27:32,498
- Put it in a bag and leave it somewhere!
- Heh, heh, heh.
2067
01:27:32,665 --> 01:27:34,792
Put it in a basket
and push it down a fucking river!
2068
01:27:34,959 --> 01:27:37,003
- Are you laughing?
- This is hilarious.
2069
01:27:37,170 --> 01:27:39,756
- Cunt!
- Did you just call our baby a cunt?
2070
01:27:39,923 --> 01:27:41,257
ISAAC:
I forgot about that.
2071
01:27:41,424 --> 01:27:43,801
Honestly... Okay, I can't watch anymore.
2072
01:27:43,968 --> 01:27:45,845
But honestly, I'm a little relieved.
2073
01:27:46,012 --> 01:27:47,388
- You are?
- Are you kidding me.
2074
01:27:47,555 --> 01:27:50,934
I feel like such a dumb asshole
compared to you sometimes.
2075
01:27:51,100 --> 01:27:53,770
It's all been a lie. It's all been a front,
because I'm fucking freaking out.
2076
01:27:53,937 --> 01:27:56,522
It's all just been to compensate
for the fact that I don't know anything.
2077
01:27:56,689 --> 01:27:59,567
- This is good. You need to let it out.
- This is good?
2078
01:27:59,734 --> 01:28:01,569
Yes. You need to not bottle it up.
2079
01:28:01,736 --> 01:28:03,655
One of us has to be not freaking out.
2080
01:28:03,821 --> 01:28:06,032
- I'm actually okay.
- Really?
2081
01:28:06,199 --> 01:28:09,119
All of a sudden I was just thinking
about everything you've been saying...
2082
01:28:09,202 --> 01:28:12,580
...about how strong we are
and how we can handle it.
2083
01:28:12,747 --> 01:28:14,248
And that made me feel better.
2084
01:28:14,415 --> 01:28:15,458
Really?
2085
01:28:15,625 --> 01:28:18,711
Yeah. I really feel like I can do this.
2086
01:28:19,545 --> 01:28:20,922
Look at me.
2087
01:28:21,089 --> 01:28:23,633
- I'm your rock.
- You're my rock?
2088
01:28:23,800 --> 01:28:24,801
I'm Dwayne.
2089
01:28:24,968 --> 01:28:26,888
I get to have sex
with Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson.
2090
01:28:27,261 --> 01:28:29,055
I love you, Isaac.
2091
01:28:29,681 --> 01:28:31,391
I love you, dragon.
2092
01:28:31,557 --> 01:28:32,976
Betsy.
2093
01:28:34,185 --> 01:28:37,021
Did you say "Dragon Betsy"?
2094
01:28:37,188 --> 01:28:38,398
I'm gonna keep being honest.
2095
01:28:38,564 --> 01:28:41,693
I'm tripping my fucking balls off still,
and you look like a dragon right now.
2096
01:28:41,859 --> 01:28:42,986
- I do?
- Yeah.
2097
01:28:43,194 --> 01:28:44,237
[ROARS]
2098
01:28:44,445 --> 01:28:46,531
ISAAC: Ah!
- Ha-ha-ha. Is that scary?
2099
01:28:46,698 --> 01:28:47,740
It's intense.
2100
01:28:47,907 --> 01:28:48,908
[ROARS]
2101
01:28:49,075 --> 01:28:51,452
Let's just go. Can we just go?
Let's just go.
2102
01:28:51,661 --> 01:28:53,454
♪ Bells will be ringing ♪
2103
01:28:55,873 --> 01:28:57,417
ISAAC:
That's nice.
2104
01:28:58,334 --> 01:29:01,087
♪ Oh, what a Christmas ♪
2105
01:29:02,130 --> 01:29:03,381
♪ To have the blues ♪
2106
01:29:03,589 --> 01:29:05,216
BETSY:
What is it?
2107
01:29:06,259 --> 01:29:09,012
♪ My baby's home ♪
2108
01:29:10,847 --> 01:29:13,224
Couldn't have been easy
to tell me that.
2109
01:29:14,392 --> 01:29:17,520
It's not gonna be easy
to tell the world either.
2110
01:29:18,021 --> 01:29:19,897
Guess we gonna lose the park, huh?
2111
01:29:20,064 --> 01:29:22,525
Fuck that park. It got crackheads.
2112
01:29:23,901 --> 01:29:25,528
Say the grace, boy.
2113
01:29:25,695 --> 01:29:27,405
Yes, ma'am.
2114
01:29:28,948 --> 01:29:31,826
Heavenly Father, thank you
for this food we're about to receive.
2115
01:29:31,993 --> 01:29:34,162
Thank you for my momma.
2116
01:29:34,328 --> 01:29:37,874
Thank you for my friends
and their families.
2117
01:29:38,458 --> 01:29:41,878
♪ Please, come home for Christmas ♪
2118
01:29:42,295 --> 01:29:45,840
♪ Please, come home for Christmas ♪
2119
01:29:46,549 --> 01:29:49,135
♪ If not for Christmas ♪
2120
01:29:50,261 --> 01:29:53,097
♪ By New Year's night ♪
2121
01:29:54,557 --> 01:29:57,143
♪ Friends and relations ♪
2122
01:29:58,561 --> 01:30:01,230
♪ Send salutations ♪♪
2123
01:30:04,734 --> 01:30:05,818
[DOORBELL RINGING]
2124
01:30:10,948 --> 01:30:13,159
- Hi.
- Really?
2125
01:30:14,285 --> 01:30:15,645
Are you gonna propose to me again?
2126
01:30:15,745 --> 01:30:16,996
- No.
- Are you sure?
2127
01:30:17,163 --> 01:30:18,748
I just wanted to talk to you.
2128
01:30:18,915 --> 01:30:20,416
And I have something to tell you...
2129
01:30:20,583 --> 01:30:23,377
...and I wanna tell it on Christmas.
If that's all right? So...
2130
01:30:23,544 --> 01:30:25,797
...it can't wait. Can you just
come out here for a sec and we'll talk...
2131
01:30:25,963 --> 01:30:27,632
...and then I'll go. I promise.
2132
01:30:31,803 --> 01:30:33,346
Okay. Fine.
2133
01:30:35,264 --> 01:30:36,265
What?
2134
01:30:36,641 --> 01:30:38,810
First of all, I'm sorry about last night.
2135
01:30:38,976 --> 01:30:41,354
- I know that was stupid.
- Yeah.
2136
01:30:43,272 --> 01:30:44,524
And...
2137
01:30:44,732 --> 01:30:48,027
And it was totally crazy
that I wouldn't meet your parents.
2138
01:30:48,194 --> 01:30:50,446
That was just me being really...
2139
01:30:50,613 --> 01:30:52,573
Yeah. I agree with that.
2140
01:30:53,116 --> 01:30:55,660
But I guess I was...
2141
01:30:56,786 --> 01:30:58,162
...I don't know, scared...
2142
01:30:58,329 --> 01:31:01,666
...because Chris and Isaac have been
my family for the last 10 years...
2143
01:31:02,166 --> 01:31:04,377
...so I didn't wanna meet your family...
2144
01:31:04,544 --> 01:31:06,838
...because that would
change everything.
2145
01:31:07,004 --> 01:31:09,048
But everything changes, right?
We all grow up...
2146
01:31:10,174 --> 01:31:12,426
...and that's a good thing,
I wanna grow up. I do.
2147
01:31:14,595 --> 01:31:16,556
I wanna grow up with you.
2148
01:31:17,765 --> 01:31:19,267
And I do wanna have a family...
2149
01:31:20,351 --> 01:31:22,562
...other than two dudes.
2150
01:31:23,104 --> 01:31:27,316
But I want that family to...
2151
01:31:28,693 --> 01:31:30,653
I want it to be you.
2152
01:31:31,445 --> 01:31:35,950
Which is probably worse
than proposing...
2153
01:31:36,117 --> 01:31:39,328
...because now we're talking
about you bearing my children.
2154
01:31:39,495 --> 01:31:40,913
Yeah. It's a lot.
2155
01:31:41,539 --> 01:31:45,376
But just pretend I'm saying it right,
if you could.
2156
01:31:46,878 --> 01:31:48,754
I'd rather be the guy, from now on...
2157
01:31:48,921 --> 01:31:51,632
...who says too much than not enough.
2158
01:31:51,799 --> 01:31:56,053
If we're being honest,
I should apologize to you also...
2159
01:31:56,220 --> 01:31:58,806
...for stalking you, a little bit.
2160
01:31:59,390 --> 01:32:02,435
I knew that you were gonna be
at that bar last night.
2161
01:32:03,102 --> 01:32:05,021
You pretended
like that was just coincidence.
2162
01:32:05,188 --> 01:32:06,814
I did. And also...
2163
01:32:06,981 --> 01:32:09,066
...if we're confessing things...
2164
01:32:10,026 --> 01:32:14,030
...I do ask Betsy about you.
2165
01:32:14,572 --> 01:32:16,199
Kind of all the time.
2166
01:32:16,365 --> 01:32:17,617
She doesn't let on.
2167
01:32:17,783 --> 01:32:19,452
I know. Because she's my friend.
2168
01:32:19,619 --> 01:32:21,219
I ask her about you
every time I see her.
2169
01:32:21,370 --> 01:32:22,872
Oh, I know.
2170
01:32:23,414 --> 01:32:25,374
- Yeah.
- She tells me every time you ask.
2171
01:32:25,541 --> 01:32:28,541
- She doesn't tell me that you ask her.
- She's a girl. That's how it works.
2172
01:32:31,422 --> 01:32:32,882
Can I come in?
2173
01:32:33,216 --> 01:32:34,634
In here?
2174
01:32:35,593 --> 01:32:38,012
- This is my parents' house.
- I know.
2175
01:32:38,179 --> 01:32:41,807
I thought that you didn't do parents.
2176
01:32:41,974 --> 01:32:44,268
- I'll do your parents.
- Oh.
2177
01:32:44,435 --> 01:32:46,020
Wow. Nice.
2178
01:32:46,187 --> 01:32:49,357
Don't do my dad doggy-style.
He's got very bad knees.
2179
01:32:49,565 --> 01:32:52,360
- Ha-ha-ha.
- He's an old man now.
2180
01:32:55,071 --> 01:32:56,405
All right.
2181
01:32:56,989 --> 01:32:58,491
- Hey.
- Yo.
2182
01:32:58,658 --> 01:33:00,910
I kind of wanna kiss you...
2183
01:33:01,077 --> 01:33:03,955
...but maybe not so soon
after saying I would do your parents.
2184
01:33:06,290 --> 01:33:08,542
♪ No more sorrow ♪
2185
01:33:09,585 --> 01:33:11,754
♪ No grief and no pain ♪
2186
01:33:13,547 --> 01:33:16,467
♪ 'Cause I'll be happy ♪
2187
01:33:16,926 --> 01:33:20,221
♪ Happy once again ♪
2188
01:33:21,347 --> 01:33:24,684
Come have sex
with my mother and my father.
2189
01:33:24,850 --> 01:33:26,530
I thought you were saying,
"Come have sex."
2190
01:33:26,560 --> 01:33:29,272
- With my mother and also my father.
- Heh.
2191
01:33:31,357 --> 01:33:35,820
[♪♪♪]
2192
01:33:38,739 --> 01:33:40,700
♪ No more sorrow ♪
2193
01:33:41,701 --> 01:33:44,120
♪ No grief and no pain ♪
2194
01:33:45,913 --> 01:33:48,332
♪ 'Cause I'll be happy ♪
2195
01:33:49,208 --> 01:33:51,294
♪ Christmas, once again ♪♪
2196
01:33:51,502 --> 01:33:52,670
She won't sleep.
2197
01:33:52,837 --> 01:33:54,797
- Can we try?
- Are you sure?
2198
01:33:54,964 --> 01:33:56,424
Showtime. Let's do it.
2199
01:33:56,590 --> 01:33:58,217
BETSY:
Thank you.
2200
01:33:58,884 --> 01:34:00,011
ISAAC:
Hey, sweetie.
2201
01:34:00,177 --> 01:34:01,178
ETHAN:
This is the best.
2202
01:34:01,345 --> 01:34:03,180
ISAAC: Come here, little sweetie.
Come here.
2203
01:34:03,764 --> 01:34:05,182
Come here, sweetie.
2204
01:34:05,349 --> 01:34:07,393
Look who it is. Who are these guys?
2205
01:34:07,560 --> 01:34:09,312
Look at that.
2206
01:34:09,478 --> 01:34:11,480
Who are these guys here?
2207
01:34:11,647 --> 01:34:13,774
- Should we do it?
- Yeah, do it.
2208
01:34:14,275 --> 01:34:17,987
♪ It's Christmas time
In Hollis, Queens ♪
2209
01:34:18,154 --> 01:34:21,407
♪ Mom's cooking chicken
And collard greens ♪
2210
01:34:21,574 --> 01:34:25,244
♪ Rice and stuffing
Macaroni and cheese ♪
2211
01:34:25,411 --> 01:34:29,123
♪ And Santa's putting gifts
Under Christmas trees ♪
2212
01:34:29,832 --> 01:34:33,169
♪ My name's DMC
With the mic in my hand ♪
2213
01:34:33,336 --> 01:34:36,964
♪ I'm chilling and cooling
Just like a snowman ♪
2214
01:34:37,131 --> 01:34:40,134
♪ So open your eyes, lend us an ear ♪
2215
01:34:40,301 --> 01:34:41,510
♪ We want to say ♪
2216
01:34:41,677 --> 01:34:45,723
♪ Merry Christmas
And Happy New Year ♪♪
2217
01:34:47,850 --> 01:34:49,852
CHRIS:
That's good. Wow.
2218
01:34:51,312 --> 01:34:53,522
NARRATOR:
The end.
2219
01:34:53,689 --> 01:34:55,524
How was that for a Christmas story?
2220
01:34:55,691 --> 01:34:57,360
That was nice!
2221
01:34:57,526 --> 01:34:58,736
That was some shit!
2222
01:34:58,903 --> 01:35:01,447
Shit happened!
Things went down!
2223
01:35:01,614 --> 01:35:03,032
Lessons were learned.
2224
01:35:03,199 --> 01:35:05,826
Friends are important,
but relationships evolve.
2225
01:35:05,993 --> 01:35:08,579
I'm so glad Ethan and Diana
ended up together.
2226
01:35:08,746 --> 01:35:10,206
I hope he get her pregnant.
2227
01:35:10,373 --> 01:35:12,333
I'd like to give a special shout-out
to my seed...
2228
01:35:12,416 --> 01:35:14,960
...for killing it again this Christmas.
2229
01:35:15,169 --> 01:35:17,004
Ha-ha-ha! Best I ever did it!
2230
01:35:17,171 --> 01:35:19,173
Shit, Pop. Thanks.
2231
01:35:19,673 --> 01:35:20,883
Thanks for noticing.
2232
01:35:21,050 --> 01:35:23,177
Right now, let the after-party begin!
2233
01:35:23,344 --> 01:35:24,512
DJ Kevy Kev!
2234
01:35:24,678 --> 01:35:26,389
Let's turn it up!
2235
01:35:27,473 --> 01:35:30,309
Turn it up, now! Holla!
2236
01:35:31,435 --> 01:35:33,595
♪ It's time to dip dive dip,
You might break your hip ♪
2237
01:35:33,687 --> 01:35:35,481
♪ To the sound that's legit
I've come to make a hit ♪
2238
01:35:35,648 --> 01:35:37,566
♪ I usually bust scratches
With my brother C.L. Smooth ♪
2239
01:35:37,733 --> 01:35:39,735
♪ But I decided to get wreck
On this groove ♪
2240
01:35:39,902 --> 01:35:41,822
♪ As I provide the slide
You're going on a ride ♪
2241
01:35:41,946 --> 01:35:43,906
♪ I know the weather's nice
There's no need to play the outside ♪
2242
01:35:44,073 --> 01:35:45,866
♪ Guess who's on the flyer
The man of your desire ♪
2243
01:35:46,033 --> 01:35:48,035
♪ Pete Rock and C.L. Smooth
All the honey dips admire ♪
2244
01:35:48,202 --> 01:35:50,362
♪ Beats are rough and rugged
Pete Rock is the creator ♪
2245
01:35:50,413 --> 01:35:52,123
♪ Now I'm busting raps
While switching cross-faders ♪
2246
01:35:52,289 --> 01:35:54,291
♪ Making sure my sound hits
From here to Grenada ♪
2247
01:35:54,458 --> 01:35:56,377
♪ Honey gave me skins, man
I told her friends I ate her ♪
2248
01:35:56,544 --> 01:35:58,462
♪ But wait up
I save this subject for later ♪
2249
01:35:58,629 --> 01:36:00,548
♪ But it's time to get wreck
With the creator ♪
2250
01:36:16,772 --> 01:36:18,941
♪ I'm addicted like a stoag
Not into vogue ♪
2251
01:36:19,108 --> 01:36:20,818
♪ Yo, Pete, there's a girl on the phone ♪
2252
01:36:20,985 --> 01:36:23,237
♪ Tell her to hold 'cause I'm busy
Kickin' rhymes to the rhythm ♪
2253
01:36:23,404 --> 01:36:25,484
♪ Fortified with soul
'Cause that's what I give 'em ♪
2254
01:36:25,573 --> 01:36:27,408
♪ Honeys form a line
'Cause I always seem to capture ♪
2255
01:36:27,575 --> 01:36:29,535
♪ Beats made of rupture
Rhymes made of rapture ♪
2256
01:36:29,702 --> 01:36:31,582
♪ Far from illiterate
Always seem to get a hit ♪
2257
01:36:31,662 --> 01:36:33,742
♪ If you try to step to this
Don't even consider it ♪
2258
01:36:33,873 --> 01:36:35,753
♪Skins when I want 'em
But only when I eat 'em ♪
2259
01:36:35,875 --> 01:36:37,710
♪ To set the record straight
I'll be damned if eat 'em ♪
2260
01:36:37,877 --> 01:36:39,597
♪ Call me Pete Rock
I make the girls flock ♪
2261
01:36:39,753 --> 01:36:41,797
♪ And if you want a beat like this
I got them in stock ♪
2262
01:36:41,964 --> 01:36:43,757
♪ So flow with the flow
Because you know I'm good to go ♪
2263
01:36:43,924 --> 01:36:46,469
♪ As I proceed to get wreck
On your stereo ♪
2264
01:36:46,677 --> 01:36:48,317
♪ Not an imitator
Just a crowd motivator ♪
2265
01:36:48,345 --> 01:36:50,185
♪ But it's time to get wreck
With the creator ♪
2266
01:37:05,488 --> 01:37:07,573
♪ C.L. Smooth cut it up like this ♪
2267
01:37:23,339 --> 01:37:25,379
♪ Now, I'm a take a try
And get a piece of the pie ♪
2268
01:37:25,424 --> 01:37:27,510
♪ If they give me one sec
To get some wreck ♪
2269
01:37:27,676 --> 01:37:29,476
♪ Never filled with anger
A good body banger ♪
2270
01:37:29,553 --> 01:37:31,555
♪If you try to step to this
You'll get hung on my hanger ♪
2271
01:37:31,722 --> 01:37:33,724
♪ Before I say goodbye
Suckers gave a good try ♪
2272
01:37:33,891 --> 01:37:35,684
♪ But point blank
You just can't see this ♪
2273
01:37:35,851 --> 01:37:37,731
♪ My word is beneficial
Pete Rock is the issue ♪
2274
01:37:37,811 --> 01:37:39,531
♪ And I know you know my style
Is official ♪
2275
01:37:39,647 --> 01:37:41,732
♪ - I might give a scratch
- Yes, cousin ♪
2276
01:37:41,899 --> 01:37:43,984
♪ - Or I might kick a verse
- No question ♪
2277
01:37:44,151 --> 01:37:46,028
♪ Either one, can't be seen
Honeys call me tall and lean ♪
2278
01:37:46,195 --> 01:37:48,072
♪ And if you get to stick around
I'll show you what I mean ♪
2279
01:37:48,239 --> 01:37:50,074
♪ Not an imitator
Just a crowd motivator ♪
2280
01:37:50,241 --> 01:37:52,326
♪ But it's time to get wreck
With the creator ♪
2281
01:37:58,999 --> 01:38:01,085
♪ It's time to get wreck
With the creator ♪
2282
01:38:07,675 --> 01:38:09,468
♪ Get wreck with the creator ♪
2283
01:38:16,225 --> 01:38:17,810
♪ The creator ♪
2284
01:38:22,022 --> 01:38:24,316
♪ C.L. Smooth, get busy ♪
2285
01:39:03,272 --> 01:39:05,024
[♪♪♪]
2286
01:39:32,217 --> 01:39:36,764
♪ 'Tis the season ♪
2287
01:39:37,222 --> 01:39:40,768
♪ There is a reason ♪
2288
01:39:40,934 --> 01:39:46,732
♪ For us to see ♪♪