1 00:02:24,043 --> 00:02:27,206 أéل يل نهéٍ ôé êلëق êلٌنéـ ف÷ù... 2 00:02:27,413 --> 00:02:32,350 èل َïُ ن‏َù êïًُüيé يل ًـٌهéٍ َôïىلôéêü نéـëُىل, مéلôك ç ليـَل َïُ ىٌُكوهé. 3 00:02:32,719 --> 00:02:36,951 I'm gonna raise you a dollar in food stamps. 4 00:02:37,257 --> 00:02:39,817 صًـٌ÷هé ىéل نïُëهéـ َôï ًëُيôقٌéï لُôïêéيقôùي Haley. 5 00:02:40,026 --> 00:02:42,620 ؤهي ًٌüêهéôلé يل ôçي ًـٌهéٍ. 6 00:02:42,896 --> 00:02:45,956 I'd like to call the hurry-up squad. I've got a good hand. 7 00:02:46,166 --> 00:02:49,727 What is this dog thing? Nobody wants... 8 00:02:50,336 --> 00:02:51,803 ذïéïٍ ôï فâلëه لُôü ىفَل; 9 00:02:52,405 --> 00:02:54,737 There's a lot. I got two dogs. 10 00:02:54,941 --> 00:02:56,909 Bring them down. We'll barbecue them. 11 00:02:57,110 --> 00:03:00,011 I'll do that. You can eat them. 12 00:03:00,213 --> 00:03:01,771 You're lucky it's not a cat. 13 00:03:06,019 --> 00:03:08,954 Put some Alpo coupons in. That's good food. 14 00:03:09,155 --> 00:03:12,249 Pure horse meat. Doesn't shrivel in the skillet. 15 00:03:12,458 --> 00:03:14,187 You can spread it on bread. 16 00:03:14,460 --> 00:03:16,758 Are we gonna play? What have you got? 17 00:03:16,963 --> 00:03:19,864 I got a straight. I almost got a straight. 18 00:03:20,066 --> 00:03:22,796 - Let me see your straight. - A pair of sevens. 19 00:03:23,670 --> 00:03:25,297 I got a pair of nines. 20 00:03:27,774 --> 00:03:29,708 There are five, six puppies. 21 00:03:31,911 --> 00:03:33,845 - How you doing? - Hi, baby. 22 00:03:35,348 --> 00:03:36,747 Can I take something? 23 00:03:36,950 --> 00:03:39,942 - Take this. - What can I get? 24 00:03:40,420 --> 00:03:44,481 - You can get lost, Clifford. - I like that. Get lost. 25 00:03:48,995 --> 00:03:51,429 - Jack. - How about a one-on-one, little man? 26 00:03:51,965 --> 00:03:54,297 It's all right with me, big man. 27 00:03:55,735 --> 00:03:57,566 Feel the ball. Bounce it. 28 00:03:57,770 --> 00:03:59,704 - Jack. - Let me have it. 29 00:04:00,840 --> 00:04:02,740 Can't you play the game? 30 00:04:04,210 --> 00:04:06,235 Are you gonna do that every time? 31 00:04:08,314 --> 00:04:11,306 Jack, your army buddy came to my office today. 32 00:04:11,517 --> 00:04:16,011 It was very embarrassing. He's gonna auction off the house. 33 00:04:16,623 --> 00:04:20,923 - He's gonna auction off the house. - My parents gave it to me. 34 00:04:21,127 --> 00:04:22,617 They gave you the mortgage. 35 00:04:22,829 --> 00:04:26,492 - You know it's mine. - We haven't paid in six months. 36 00:04:26,699 --> 00:04:30,863 I haven't finished the book. When I do, I'll get the money. 37 00:04:31,070 --> 00:04:35,769 - Would you stop about the book? - Angela, you know I'm a writer. 38 00:04:35,975 --> 00:04:39,467 Yes, darling. You're a writer. A very good writer. 39 00:04:39,679 --> 00:04:41,510 - I am a writer, right? - He is. 40 00:04:41,714 --> 00:04:43,705 Everybody, ain't I a writer? 41 00:04:52,725 --> 00:04:54,158 Stanley! 42 00:04:55,261 --> 00:04:58,992 Register at the desk if you want to take the class. 43 00:04:59,198 --> 00:05:01,962 I want to see my friend before he goes to work. 44 00:05:02,168 --> 00:05:03,760 Jack, get out of here. 45 00:05:07,874 --> 00:05:11,674 Why are you upsetting Angela, telling her you're selling my house? 46 00:05:11,878 --> 00:05:14,312 You're not going to sell it, right? 47 00:05:19,452 --> 00:05:22,148 The house belongs to the bank... 48 00:05:22,355 --> 00:05:25,153 ...unless you come up with a quick 10 grand. 49 00:05:25,425 --> 00:05:29,885 I'm trying to stop them, but I can't help if you don't have a job. 50 00:05:30,096 --> 00:05:32,257 So get a job and get out, Jack. 51 00:05:32,465 --> 00:05:35,093 I have a job. Writing a book is a job. 52 00:05:35,301 --> 00:05:38,964 Writing a book is a cop-out, Jack. Now get a job. 53 00:05:39,172 --> 00:05:42,335 A paying job will convince them of your sincerity... 54 00:05:42,542 --> 00:05:45,443 ...and your honest intentions. 55 00:05:45,645 --> 00:05:47,010 Ticklish! 56 00:05:47,380 --> 00:05:50,543 Now why don't you get a job? And don't touch me. 57 00:05:50,750 --> 00:05:53,742 No physical contact. We'll lose our license. 58 00:05:55,688 --> 00:05:59,556 Get out of here, will you? You're disrupting the cast. 59 00:05:59,759 --> 00:06:02,091 Just get out! Out! Out! 60 00:06:09,068 --> 00:06:12,231 Get a job! Get a job! Get a job! 61 00:06:32,525 --> 00:06:35,016 Hey, brother. Where you going? 62 00:06:36,229 --> 00:06:39,960 - Where you going? - Clifford, I'm here for a job. 63 00:06:40,166 --> 00:06:43,158 - What do you think we're in line for? - The bus. 64 00:06:43,369 --> 00:06:46,770 No. The job. I'll tell you what to do. Just a moment. 65 00:06:46,973 --> 00:06:50,704 - All you waiting on the job? - Yeah. Get your bicycle. 66 00:06:50,910 --> 00:06:53,708 Okay? There you go, to the end of the line. 67 00:06:53,913 --> 00:06:57,110 If you can't find it, come back to the front again. 68 00:06:58,851 --> 00:07:00,341 Watch the cars. 69 00:07:28,548 --> 00:07:30,982 Oh, my God! He's gonna hit that man! 70 00:07:39,091 --> 00:07:43,221 Come on, Shorty. Come on. Watch yourself. Come on. 71 00:07:43,429 --> 00:07:45,260 There you go. Good boy. 72 00:07:46,766 --> 00:07:49,394 Hey! What, you crazy idiot! 73 00:07:59,645 --> 00:08:02,239 Yeah. No. Instruments? No. 74 00:08:03,149 --> 00:08:05,947 Cleaning lady? Cleaning lady? 75 00:08:13,192 --> 00:08:14,819 Hey! Halt. 76 00:08:15,228 --> 00:08:17,753 Hey, pops. What do you need? 77 00:08:18,164 --> 00:08:20,257 Want to keep an eye on this for me? 78 00:08:25,738 --> 00:08:29,469 - Hi, foxy lady. - Thank you very much. 79 00:08:29,675 --> 00:08:32,473 A quarter. I'll buy a car. 80 00:08:32,678 --> 00:08:35,340 - I have a job for you. You mind? - Not at all. 81 00:08:35,548 --> 00:08:39,507 Hold those while I get in. Bless your heart. Good luck to you. Thank you. 82 00:08:39,719 --> 00:08:42,119 - Not for you. - It's a free country. 83 00:08:42,321 --> 00:08:44,755 - That's Fancy Bates. - His daughter? 84 00:08:44,957 --> 00:08:48,154 - Wife numero three. - You think she is ready? 85 00:08:48,361 --> 00:08:51,159 - Ready for what? - Black experience. 86 00:08:52,465 --> 00:08:53,796 You ready? 87 00:08:56,869 --> 00:08:58,894 Take it easy, Fancy. 88 00:08:59,972 --> 00:09:01,564 Miss Jackie Brown. 89 00:09:02,508 --> 00:09:04,976 Is there no Miss Jackie Brown? 90 00:09:05,177 --> 00:09:07,737 - That's me. - Miss Jackie Brown. 91 00:09:07,947 --> 00:09:11,144 - I got it. - Not you. We need a part-time woman. 92 00:09:11,350 --> 00:09:14,547 I can be a part-time woman. I'm a part-time woman. 93 00:09:14,854 --> 00:09:16,151 Jackie Brown. 94 00:09:16,756 --> 00:09:19,486 Man, no jive. This is... That's good. 95 00:09:19,692 --> 00:09:23,492 That's very good. You're what we call "overqualified." 96 00:09:23,696 --> 00:09:28,463 Mr. Brown, we're looking for a woman to do a little part-time cleaning... 97 00:09:28,668 --> 00:09:30,636 ...and you're a journalist. 98 00:09:30,836 --> 00:09:33,805 Go see the people in Mr. Bates' newspaper. 99 00:09:34,006 --> 00:09:36,702 The Bugle. They aren't hiring any blacks. 100 00:09:37,977 --> 00:09:40,002 Is this a protest? 101 00:09:41,581 --> 00:09:44,641 You're not starting a sit-in, are you? 102 00:09:45,184 --> 00:09:46,845 I just want a job. 103 00:09:47,553 --> 00:09:51,319 Here's your Phi Beta. I'm sorry. 104 00:09:51,524 --> 00:09:55,255 I can do anything a woman can do. Almost. 105 00:09:55,995 --> 00:09:57,986 No. Answer's no. 106 00:09:58,197 --> 00:10:01,325 No now. No tomorrow. No next week. 107 00:10:01,534 --> 00:10:04,298 No next month. No next year. 108 00:10:06,172 --> 00:10:09,437 You know what I like about this outfit, Mr. Morehouse? 109 00:10:09,642 --> 00:10:11,735 Its open-mindedness. 110 00:10:11,944 --> 00:10:15,903 I think you're trouble. Mr. Bates doesn't want any trouble. 111 00:10:16,115 --> 00:10:20,211 Thank you for coming. My secretary will give you a parking validation. 112 00:10:20,419 --> 00:10:25,288 I'm not trouble. My girlfriend, she's trouble. 113 00:10:25,658 --> 00:10:29,185 Is she foxy? What kind of trouble could she be? 114 00:10:29,395 --> 00:10:32,956 Oh, she's a legal staff for the local Klanwatch. 115 00:10:33,633 --> 00:10:35,931 She's very litigious. 116 00:10:37,103 --> 00:10:38,502 Litigious. 117 00:10:39,438 --> 00:10:41,998 - She sues people? - Like in court. 118 00:10:42,208 --> 00:10:45,473 Why don't you sit down? You don't want this job. 119 00:10:45,678 --> 00:10:47,509 No. I'll be truthful with you. 120 00:10:47,713 --> 00:10:52,047 You'd have to come in two days, on Tuesdays and Fridays... 121 00:10:52,251 --> 00:10:54,481 ...to serve a staff luncheon. 122 00:10:54,687 --> 00:10:56,917 I waited tables in college. 123 00:10:57,123 --> 00:11:01,753 Every weeknight you have to clean the window displays for three hours. 124 00:11:01,961 --> 00:11:05,761 - I'll take it. - Is it that bad out there? 125 00:11:05,965 --> 00:11:07,455 Worse. 126 00:11:09,235 --> 00:11:11,396 How attached are you to that beard? 127 00:11:11,604 --> 00:11:16,303 I'm not gonna vacuum with my beard. That's the '60s. This is the '80s. 128 00:11:16,509 --> 00:11:19,478 You see, we're part of Mr. Bates' family here. 129 00:11:19,679 --> 00:11:21,613 And none of us have beards. 130 00:11:21,814 --> 00:11:24,612 I will not be denied, Sidney. 131 00:11:27,319 --> 00:11:29,719 She's busy. Come back about 3 o'clock. 132 00:11:29,922 --> 00:11:33,187 I'm looking for Miss Ruby D. Simpson. 133 00:11:33,959 --> 00:11:35,859 That's me. What do you want? 134 00:11:36,062 --> 00:11:38,155 I'm the new cleaning lady. 135 00:11:42,501 --> 00:11:45,800 Lord, have mercy. Morehouse done flipped his wig. 136 00:11:46,005 --> 00:11:47,768 I'm the new cleaning lady. 137 00:11:49,909 --> 00:11:52,377 Come on, honey. Walk this way. 138 00:11:54,980 --> 00:11:56,311 Move it. 139 00:11:57,950 --> 00:12:01,909 He's gonna want to see all of this. So you know your job. 140 00:12:02,388 --> 00:12:04,652 You want to be ready, right? 141 00:12:05,458 --> 00:12:07,358 Chicken, Mr. Morehouse? 142 00:12:13,032 --> 00:12:16,798 Please get some pants on before Mr. Bates sees you, okay? 143 00:12:17,002 --> 00:12:18,663 Okay, pilgrim. 144 00:12:35,121 --> 00:12:36,554 Good morning, U.S. 145 00:12:37,957 --> 00:12:39,948 - How are you, U. S? - Pretty good. 146 00:12:40,426 --> 00:12:44,362 - Mr. U.S., phone. - No calls. Time is money. 147 00:12:44,563 --> 00:12:47,293 - It's your son. - Excuse me. 148 00:12:47,500 --> 00:12:49,058 Time is money. 149 00:12:51,003 --> 00:12:52,470 Hello, Eric. 150 00:12:53,172 --> 00:12:54,969 How was the flight? 151 00:12:55,374 --> 00:12:57,899 Good. Good. 152 00:12:58,611 --> 00:13:02,980 I'm glad you're here. We're gonna have a wonderful week. 153 00:13:03,182 --> 00:13:05,616 And anything you want. 154 00:13:06,018 --> 00:13:09,181 Anything. Absolutely. 155 00:13:10,356 --> 00:13:12,517 Okay, son. I'll see you. 156 00:13:29,441 --> 00:13:31,909 - That's my tomato salad. - I'm sorry. 157 00:13:34,413 --> 00:13:35,710 No, my salad. 158 00:13:35,915 --> 00:13:38,076 Mine had four eggs on it. 159 00:13:42,822 --> 00:13:45,052 I can... I can go help fix this. 160 00:13:46,692 --> 00:13:48,489 I can fix this. 161 00:13:50,996 --> 00:13:52,793 Excuse me, Mr. Morehouse. 162 00:13:59,205 --> 00:14:01,901 I'm sorry, U.S. Goes back to you. 163 00:14:04,243 --> 00:14:06,268 No, these other people got to eat. 164 00:14:13,552 --> 00:14:15,076 Me, U. S? 165 00:14:17,723 --> 00:14:21,022 He wants to talk to you. Go on down there. 166 00:14:21,360 --> 00:14:23,123 Cover your lip. Mustache. 167 00:14:23,863 --> 00:14:24,989 Cover your lip. 168 00:14:52,925 --> 00:14:55,257 Sorry, Mr. Bates. 169 00:15:12,945 --> 00:15:16,847 You're very strong for a little lady. 170 00:15:17,416 --> 00:15:20,408 And you have a lot of hair on your lip. 171 00:15:24,823 --> 00:15:28,884 We don't like our waitresses to have hairy lips. 172 00:15:31,664 --> 00:15:34,360 You see, I noticed... 173 00:15:35,000 --> 00:15:39,835 - Tell you what. Shave. - Shave? 174 00:15:43,008 --> 00:15:46,466 And after you shave, you're fired. 175 00:15:48,113 --> 00:15:51,105 Thank you, Mr. Bates. 176 00:15:56,522 --> 00:16:00,618 No, I can do it. I can do it, Mr. Bates. 177 00:16:08,200 --> 00:16:10,327 - What did he say? - What a great man. 178 00:16:10,536 --> 00:16:14,996 He says I'm sexy and he loves the chicken. 179 00:16:16,842 --> 00:16:19,436 Know what I mean, soul brother? 180 00:16:19,645 --> 00:16:22,239 Power to the people. Right on. 181 00:16:41,734 --> 00:16:44,601 Here we are, young man. Shall I wait? 182 00:16:46,872 --> 00:16:49,841 Give me a hand. Somebody give me a hand. 183 00:16:50,042 --> 00:16:53,205 Let's see, hand, football. 184 00:16:54,847 --> 00:16:58,943 Do I have to stay? I'm an accountant. Will he exceed his credit? 185 00:16:59,151 --> 00:17:00,584 We gotta win this one. 186 00:17:00,786 --> 00:17:04,779 There's six seconds or we don't win the Super Bowl. 187 00:17:04,990 --> 00:17:07,424 I didn't come this far to lose, okay? 188 00:17:07,726 --> 00:17:09,990 He's fired. Did you fire him? 189 00:17:10,195 --> 00:17:12,322 I didn't fire him. You're the ones... 190 00:17:14,900 --> 00:17:17,300 Go deep. Swing left on blue, okay? 191 00:17:17,503 --> 00:17:20,370 On six. On three. On two. 192 00:17:20,572 --> 00:17:22,733 Be ready. Somebody get Matoussac. 193 00:17:22,941 --> 00:17:26,900 Okay! 36, 44, on blue! 194 00:17:28,013 --> 00:17:29,503 Go for it! 195 00:17:35,154 --> 00:17:36,587 I'm okay. 196 00:17:37,356 --> 00:17:39,415 Blue, 26, 32. 197 00:17:41,460 --> 00:17:45,521 It's always my toy department! Why can't he get into stereos? 198 00:17:45,731 --> 00:17:49,827 - Or something we don't even sell. - We sell everything. 199 00:18:01,780 --> 00:18:03,577 Don't know my own strength. 200 00:18:04,950 --> 00:18:07,475 "Danger. Do not touch." 201 00:18:12,391 --> 00:18:13,915 Wonder Wheel. 202 00:18:16,028 --> 00:18:18,053 Looks like a job for me. 203 00:18:21,767 --> 00:18:23,234 Wonder Wheel. 204 00:18:23,602 --> 00:18:25,092 This is great. 205 00:18:26,138 --> 00:18:28,936 Bounces. Dance on it. 206 00:18:30,109 --> 00:18:32,168 What's so dangerous about... 207 00:18:33,512 --> 00:18:36,072 It doesn't work. That's why it's dangerous. 208 00:18:36,281 --> 00:18:38,181 It works! 209 00:18:40,986 --> 00:18:45,150 Wonder Wheel! Stop! I admit it, it works! 210 00:18:45,991 --> 00:18:47,549 Okay. Stop, Wonder Wheel! 211 00:18:47,759 --> 00:18:50,626 Nice Wonder Wheel! Stop! 212 00:18:56,435 --> 00:18:58,096 Stop the Wonder Wheel! 213 00:18:58,303 --> 00:19:01,898 Help! Wonder Wheel! 214 00:19:02,908 --> 00:19:05,638 I'm the Wonder Wheel champion of the world! 215 00:19:05,844 --> 00:19:08,813 Miracle Wonder Wheel! The best one! 216 00:19:09,648 --> 00:19:10,774 The best... 217 00:19:11,216 --> 00:19:14,014 Wonder Wheel, no. Wonder Wheel... 218 00:19:14,887 --> 00:19:19,221 Come on. Don't, you can't. We've been through too much together. 219 00:19:19,424 --> 00:19:22,086 Come on! Come on, Wonder Wheel. 220 00:19:22,294 --> 00:19:24,228 Come on, you can do it. 221 00:19:24,429 --> 00:19:27,728 I don't want to be a Wonder-Wheel murderer. 222 00:19:27,933 --> 00:19:30,163 I want you to play with kids. 223 00:19:30,369 --> 00:19:32,997 You haven't even been to the zoo. 224 00:19:33,205 --> 00:19:35,571 You never even touched water. 225 00:19:35,774 --> 00:19:38,937 Come on, Wonder Wheel. Where's your heart? 226 00:19:57,196 --> 00:19:59,596 - I know what I want. - He likes it. 227 00:19:59,798 --> 00:20:02,858 - Let's blow it up right away. - The black man. 228 00:20:04,536 --> 00:20:06,970 He wants one in black, all right? 229 00:20:07,172 --> 00:20:11,233 - The black man! - He wants the black man. 230 00:20:12,511 --> 00:20:16,607 No, Eric, no. Not today. Not now. Not ever. 231 00:20:17,416 --> 00:20:19,441 - Yes. - He's not a toy. 232 00:20:19,651 --> 00:20:22,620 He's trouble. See the mustache? I asked him to shave. 233 00:20:22,821 --> 00:20:27,121 - I really don't care. - He's one of our cleaning people. 234 00:20:27,326 --> 00:20:29,294 - I want him. - He's not for sale. 235 00:20:29,494 --> 00:20:32,395 - Why not? - Because he's a person. 236 00:20:32,598 --> 00:20:35,965 Daddy said anything I wanted, anything in the store. 237 00:20:36,168 --> 00:20:39,331 - You can't buy a human, Eric. - Why not? 238 00:20:39,538 --> 00:20:41,028 Because... 239 00:20:42,708 --> 00:20:44,869 It's against the law, isn't it? 240 00:20:47,012 --> 00:20:49,674 Doesn't my daddy make the laws? 241 00:20:51,416 --> 00:20:54,180 I think he's got a point there. 242 00:20:54,386 --> 00:20:55,853 Mr. Morehouse. 243 00:20:57,322 --> 00:20:58,448 Now! 244 00:21:00,058 --> 00:21:01,855 It's your department. 245 00:21:03,929 --> 00:21:07,126 - Good choice. - You'll have a wonderful time. 246 00:21:09,668 --> 00:21:12,501 - Tim, Toys. - Jack, Windows. 247 00:21:12,704 --> 00:21:15,764 - Remember me? - I'm fired, right? 248 00:21:15,974 --> 00:21:19,273 No, no. Do you see that kid over there? 249 00:21:22,681 --> 00:21:25,616 - He's the son of our... - Boss. 250 00:21:26,385 --> 00:21:29,821 - He's bright. - I see the resemblance. 251 00:21:31,123 --> 00:21:33,648 - He'd like to take you home with him. - Why? 252 00:21:33,859 --> 00:21:35,326 It's just a joke. 253 00:21:35,527 --> 00:21:39,793 What, is he sick? Nuts, right? What are we talking about? 254 00:21:39,998 --> 00:21:42,831 He's just used to getting his own way. 255 00:21:43,302 --> 00:21:46,328 - You guys are serious! - No jive. 256 00:21:46,538 --> 00:21:49,666 - You want me to go with him? - Lf you wouldn't mind. 257 00:21:49,875 --> 00:21:53,367 - I mind. - I don't want him to get angry here. 258 00:21:53,578 --> 00:21:55,478 He can do a lot of damage. 259 00:21:55,681 --> 00:21:58,013 I don't care. I'm not going anywhere. 260 00:21:58,216 --> 00:21:59,410 No, sir. Not me. 261 00:21:59,618 --> 00:22:03,918 No now. No tomorrow. No next week. I'm not... 262 00:22:04,122 --> 00:22:06,647 No! As you say, you know? 263 00:22:06,858 --> 00:22:09,554 I think we have to butter your bread. 264 00:22:12,064 --> 00:22:13,964 You can't... I can't be bought. 265 00:22:14,166 --> 00:22:17,499 This got settled in the Civil War. You can't have slaves. 266 00:22:17,703 --> 00:22:21,639 We just want to rent you for a little while. 267 00:22:21,840 --> 00:22:25,105 - What is your hourly rate? - I don't have... 268 00:22:26,545 --> 00:22:28,206 By the hour. 269 00:22:29,614 --> 00:22:32,082 I don't have to stay long? 270 00:22:33,785 --> 00:22:36,447 You'll give a decent burial to Wonder Wheel? 271 00:22:36,655 --> 00:22:38,316 - Yes. - That's my friend. 272 00:22:38,523 --> 00:22:41,981 This is light. Thank you. 273 00:22:43,695 --> 00:22:46,220 It's a little light here. Thank you. 274 00:22:46,431 --> 00:22:47,989 A little light. 275 00:22:49,101 --> 00:22:50,796 Very pleased to meet you. 276 00:22:51,002 --> 00:22:53,562 This is Eric. Eric, he has agreed. 277 00:22:53,772 --> 00:22:57,208 His name is Jack Brown. Jack, Master Bates. 278 00:23:01,847 --> 00:23:03,212 Wrap him up. 279 00:23:03,415 --> 00:23:07,078 Wrap who up? I don't get wrapped. 280 00:23:07,285 --> 00:23:10,982 I can't be wrapped unless you have ribbon or something soft. 281 00:23:11,156 --> 00:23:12,987 This is still light. 282 00:23:18,363 --> 00:23:20,695 Elbows off the table. 283 00:23:22,401 --> 00:23:24,767 Sit up, Eric. 284 00:23:27,672 --> 00:23:31,699 Now, Eric, our stomachs digest our food a lot better... 285 00:23:31,910 --> 00:23:35,744 ...if we eat some vegetables, some starch and some meat. 286 00:23:35,947 --> 00:23:39,906 In that order. Not all the vegetables at one time. 287 00:23:40,118 --> 00:23:43,110 - I hate liver. - I only understand German. 288 00:23:43,321 --> 00:23:44,948 I hate German. 289 00:23:46,491 --> 00:23:48,152 Well, Eric... 290 00:23:48,493 --> 00:23:51,189 ...it certainly is a pleasure to have you. 291 00:23:51,396 --> 00:23:53,261 Now, what do you want to do first? 292 00:23:53,999 --> 00:23:57,435 Six Flags? Delta Queen? New Orleans? 293 00:23:57,636 --> 00:24:00,127 You know, I have a new helicopter. 294 00:24:06,044 --> 00:24:07,306 How's school? 295 00:24:10,582 --> 00:24:12,106 How's your math? 296 00:24:16,988 --> 00:24:18,114 How are the boys? 297 00:24:23,295 --> 00:24:25,957 Does Fancy have to come to Six Flags with us? 298 00:24:26,164 --> 00:24:29,099 Certainly not. Do you want Barkley to take you? 299 00:24:29,301 --> 00:24:31,701 I want you to take me. 300 00:24:34,272 --> 00:24:39,107 Eric, I've got a surprise for you. Your present's arrived. 301 00:24:40,011 --> 00:24:42,605 Not until you finish your meal! 302 00:24:42,814 --> 00:24:44,748 Now just a minute here! 303 00:24:46,151 --> 00:24:49,120 Boys will be boys, God bless him. 304 00:24:58,029 --> 00:25:00,361 - Finish your dinner. - Get me a hammer. 305 00:25:00,565 --> 00:25:03,159 - Not until you eat. - Get me a hammer. 306 00:25:03,368 --> 00:25:06,166 If you don't come and finish your dinner... 307 00:25:06,371 --> 00:25:08,635 ...you won't open that until tomorrow. 308 00:25:08,840 --> 00:25:10,705 Are you crazy? 309 00:25:14,279 --> 00:25:15,940 What's going on in here? 310 00:25:16,147 --> 00:25:20,049 She won't help me open my present. She won't give me a hammer. 311 00:25:21,086 --> 00:25:24,453 - What the hell is that? - Help! 312 00:25:26,224 --> 00:25:28,192 You said I could have anything. 313 00:25:29,094 --> 00:25:31,688 Help, please. I need air. 314 00:25:31,897 --> 00:25:33,865 Schatzie, get a hammer. 315 00:25:35,433 --> 00:25:38,925 - Can I have some air? - Who are you? 316 00:25:39,137 --> 00:25:43,801 I'm the new part-time cleaning lady, sir, at the store. 317 00:25:45,477 --> 00:25:47,240 What are you doing in there? 318 00:25:47,445 --> 00:25:50,039 Your son came along and asked them... 319 00:25:50,248 --> 00:25:52,716 ...to wrap me up, which they did, in a box. 320 00:25:52,918 --> 00:25:54,579 This box. 321 00:25:56,821 --> 00:26:01,451 I hope you have a good explanation for this. 322 00:26:01,660 --> 00:26:05,426 You said anything in the store. Well, he was in the store. 323 00:26:07,599 --> 00:26:10,466 I get to open it. It's my present. 324 00:26:10,669 --> 00:26:12,261 What? 325 00:26:15,040 --> 00:26:16,371 Hurry! 326 00:26:18,109 --> 00:26:19,940 Please hurry. 327 00:26:41,499 --> 00:26:43,467 Didn't I tell you to shave? 328 00:26:43,668 --> 00:26:46,831 - Sorry. - Sir. 329 00:26:48,239 --> 00:26:49,797 Sorry, sir. 330 00:26:50,675 --> 00:26:53,838 - I mean, come here. - No way. 331 00:26:59,718 --> 00:27:02,744 Wait a minute. Let's not be too hasty. 332 00:27:02,954 --> 00:27:05,718 - I'll pay you on an hourly basis. - Sir. 333 00:27:06,491 --> 00:27:09,688 All right, I'll pay you on an hourly basis, sir. 334 00:27:09,894 --> 00:27:10,952 No. 335 00:27:11,997 --> 00:27:14,727 What sort of a position are you looking for? 336 00:27:14,933 --> 00:27:19,233 - Slave sound too crass? - I'm serious. 337 00:27:19,437 --> 00:27:20,995 I am too. I'm a journalist. 338 00:27:21,206 --> 00:27:24,141 I've been trying to get a job on your newspaper. 339 00:27:24,342 --> 00:27:27,971 The only black people you hire do windows, mop floors... 340 00:27:28,179 --> 00:27:32,548 I don't like it. I tried it. Believe me, I have dignity. 341 00:27:32,751 --> 00:27:36,016 Take those firecrackers and... Never mind. 342 00:27:39,391 --> 00:27:43,589 - That's not the way out. - Go get him, Daddy. 343 00:27:44,429 --> 00:27:47,626 - Wait. What's your name? - Jack Brown. 344 00:27:47,832 --> 00:27:50,995 I only have the boy for one week a year. 345 00:27:51,202 --> 00:27:53,932 Get better lawyers. That's too long. 346 00:27:54,139 --> 00:27:57,802 - I love him. - Frankly, I don't give a damn. 347 00:27:58,009 --> 00:28:02,173 - He wants you to stay. - He wants to see if you can make me. 348 00:28:02,380 --> 00:28:05,247 He's manipulative. It's a power play. 349 00:28:06,284 --> 00:28:10,015 You know, if you were a little less hysterical... 350 00:28:10,221 --> 00:28:14,351 ...you'd suggest I pay you what I pay my reporters for a week. 351 00:28:14,793 --> 00:28:17,762 - $400. - For babysitting? 352 00:28:18,363 --> 00:28:19,921 Step in my office. 353 00:28:24,335 --> 00:28:27,668 Isn't that a magnificent arrangement of dominoes? 354 00:28:27,872 --> 00:28:29,772 It's really something. 355 00:28:29,974 --> 00:28:33,910 - It took me over a month to set it up. - A month? Wow! 356 00:28:34,245 --> 00:28:36,577 It's rewarding. Have a seat. 357 00:28:45,657 --> 00:28:50,560 I'm a man who gets what he wants by patience. 358 00:28:50,795 --> 00:28:54,458 Some people exercise their tibias or fibulas... 359 00:28:54,766 --> 00:28:57,234 I exercise my patience. 360 00:29:08,913 --> 00:29:10,540 Patience. 361 00:29:12,917 --> 00:29:14,282 No hole. 362 00:29:14,486 --> 00:29:18,183 Just bite the end off. And spit it in your hand. 363 00:29:26,498 --> 00:29:31,401 Eric's not a bad boy. High-spirited. I like that. 364 00:29:31,603 --> 00:29:33,195 I like him. 365 00:29:33,505 --> 00:29:35,996 - You'll like him. - I'm crazy about him. 366 00:29:36,207 --> 00:29:39,938 He should understand that money means never being sorry. 367 00:29:40,145 --> 00:29:44,104 That's about the only thing he does understand. 368 00:29:45,583 --> 00:29:48,381 That's not an ashtray, you asshole. 369 00:29:48,887 --> 00:29:50,855 That's an ashtray. 370 00:29:57,629 --> 00:30:00,996 What you're offering me isn't a job. It's an insult. 371 00:30:01,199 --> 00:30:04,430 I'm insulted and I'm splitting. 372 00:30:06,337 --> 00:30:09,465 All right, what do you need? 373 00:30:09,808 --> 00:30:11,002 I need? 374 00:30:11,810 --> 00:30:13,903 - $10,000. - Ten... 375 00:30:14,112 --> 00:30:16,546 You're not a reporter. You're a crook. 376 00:30:16,748 --> 00:30:19,717 You didn't ask me what I'd settle for. 377 00:30:19,951 --> 00:30:24,854 - That's what I meant. - Let's start at 1000 and work up. 378 00:30:25,056 --> 00:30:26,648 That's highway robbery. 379 00:30:26,858 --> 00:30:29,691 I'd settle for $400 and a job on The Bugle. 380 00:30:29,928 --> 00:30:32,897 There isn't any job on the paper. 381 00:30:33,865 --> 00:30:36,231 - 1500. - Deal. 382 00:30:37,135 --> 00:30:39,695 - 2000. - Now, wait a minute. 383 00:30:40,004 --> 00:30:41,096 We had a deal. 384 00:30:41,573 --> 00:30:45,236 - Two-five. - Fine, but for that kind of money... 385 00:30:45,443 --> 00:30:48,037 ...if Eric blows his nose, you wipe it. 386 00:30:49,214 --> 00:30:51,273 - 3000. - Two-five. 387 00:30:51,482 --> 00:30:54,178 - Two-seven. - Two-five is my top. 388 00:30:54,419 --> 00:30:58,253 - $3000. - I wonder if Eric knows... 389 00:30:58,456 --> 00:31:01,118 ...what kind of bastard he's getting. 390 00:31:01,326 --> 00:31:03,988 I may be a bastard, Mr. Bates, but l... 391 00:31:25,316 --> 00:31:27,716 - I'll kill you! - Two-five is fine. 392 00:31:27,919 --> 00:31:29,386 Two-five is excellent. 393 00:31:29,587 --> 00:31:31,612 Are you at the store? 394 00:31:32,390 --> 00:31:35,985 Well, where are you? At U.S. Bates' house? 395 00:31:36,728 --> 00:31:39,720 The U.S. Bates' house? Clifford, hold it down. 396 00:31:39,931 --> 00:31:44,300 - I'm working for U.S. Bates. - "I'm working for U.S. Bates." 397 00:31:44,502 --> 00:31:45,833 Not on the paper... 398 00:31:46,070 --> 00:31:47,332 A toy? 399 00:31:47,538 --> 00:31:52,100 - I'm U.S. Bates' toy. I'm not stoned. - Let's play. Get off the phone! 400 00:31:52,310 --> 00:31:56,406 No, he's not playing with me. I'm his son's toy, Eric. 401 00:31:56,614 --> 00:31:58,912 He's got a son and he hired me... 402 00:31:59,117 --> 00:32:03,144 He's one of the nicest kids I've ever met. He's really... 403 00:32:03,354 --> 00:32:05,447 - Play with me! - He's wonderful. 404 00:32:05,657 --> 00:32:08,683 - Ask me how much I'm making. - Get off the phone. 405 00:32:08,893 --> 00:32:11,054 - Get off the phone! - Just ask me. 406 00:32:11,262 --> 00:32:15,460 - $2500 a week! - Get off the phone! 407 00:32:16,367 --> 00:32:20,394 - Say goodbye! Come on! - He's a wonderful... 408 00:32:20,605 --> 00:32:24,200 - He's just wonderful. - You're paid to play, not to talk. 409 00:32:24,409 --> 00:32:26,843 - Just a minute. How old are you? - Nine. 410 00:32:27,111 --> 00:32:30,478 You want to live to be 10? Do you? 411 00:32:37,021 --> 00:32:40,218 - Fancy. - Wait until I'm done, U.S. 412 00:32:41,359 --> 00:32:44,351 - I've got to talk to you. - But I'm busy. 413 00:32:44,562 --> 00:32:47,656 What I have to tell you is important! 414 00:32:48,132 --> 00:32:52,569 - What am I supposed to do? - How do you turn off this machine? 415 00:32:54,772 --> 00:32:57,798 Oh, sugar. I like it like that. 416 00:33:07,418 --> 00:33:11,115 - That was fun. - Please. I have a headache. 417 00:33:11,322 --> 00:33:13,017 I've got something to say. 418 00:33:13,224 --> 00:33:17,160 Is it about the party? Everything's arranged beautifully. 419 00:33:17,662 --> 00:33:19,391 It's about Eric. 420 00:33:20,431 --> 00:33:23,798 Oh, God! Has it been a year already? 421 00:33:24,002 --> 00:33:26,027 I forgot it was his week. 422 00:33:26,237 --> 00:33:30,537 What do I have to do with him? Take him to Six Flags? 423 00:33:31,642 --> 00:33:32,939 He... 424 00:33:34,178 --> 00:33:35,736 He bought a black man. 425 00:33:37,281 --> 00:33:41,775 - I wasn't aware that we sold them. - I wanted you to know... 426 00:33:41,986 --> 00:33:45,251 ...so you wouldn't be frightened if you saw him. 427 00:33:45,456 --> 00:33:50,120 - There's a black man in this house? - It's only for a week. 428 00:33:50,528 --> 00:33:54,931 - But why? - To play with, he says. 429 00:33:55,133 --> 00:33:57,761 To aggravate you and me, I say. 430 00:33:58,169 --> 00:34:01,764 Heaven forbid! You just tell him no, you ass. 431 00:34:02,940 --> 00:34:06,103 That's U.S., not "you ass." 432 00:34:06,978 --> 00:34:11,506 Well, I'm just gonna take a shower, U.S. 433 00:34:27,565 --> 00:34:28,623 Look out! 434 00:34:28,866 --> 00:34:30,959 My bedroom's over here. 435 00:34:35,873 --> 00:34:39,673 I am Swiss. I know nothing! Oh, Eric! 436 00:34:43,714 --> 00:34:45,648 - This is fun, Jack. - Fun? 437 00:34:46,184 --> 00:34:47,879 Look out! 438 00:35:12,543 --> 00:35:16,502 I didn't figure your weight in the turn. Great ride, though. 439 00:35:16,714 --> 00:35:19,740 Are you all right, Master Bates? Are you? 440 00:35:22,053 --> 00:35:24,681 Jesus Christ! Are you crazy? 441 00:35:24,889 --> 00:35:26,254 What are you doing? 442 00:35:26,457 --> 00:35:28,721 Stop making faces. Leave him alone. 443 00:35:31,662 --> 00:35:34,825 Here's a hat. Now put it on. Let's go! 444 00:35:35,032 --> 00:35:37,023 Give him a ticket. Put it on. 445 00:35:37,268 --> 00:35:39,236 I'm Eric Bates! 446 00:35:39,470 --> 00:35:41,631 Chop, chop! Give him a ticket! 447 00:35:41,873 --> 00:35:44,467 What's going on? What do you mean? 448 00:35:44,675 --> 00:35:48,873 Is everybody like this? Does this go on every day? 449 00:35:49,080 --> 00:35:51,480 - You can't talk. - He's clean! 450 00:35:51,682 --> 00:35:54,879 Thank you. That's more than the floor is. 451 00:35:55,086 --> 00:35:57,247 - Know what's on that floor? - No. 452 00:35:57,455 --> 00:35:58,922 Your dinner. 453 00:35:59,490 --> 00:36:03,517 That was my dinner? That was my dinner, Shirley Temple. 454 00:36:03,728 --> 00:36:06,219 - I don't care. Get in! - You don't... 455 00:36:06,430 --> 00:36:11,197 - Got a license to drive on the steps? - I don't need one. I'm Eric Bates. 456 00:36:11,402 --> 00:36:13,700 You'll learn the hard way, laddie. 457 00:36:13,905 --> 00:36:18,433 - I'm U.S. Bates' son! - You got a jail around here? 458 00:36:18,643 --> 00:36:20,270 - A jail? - Yes! 459 00:36:20,478 --> 00:36:23,504 - On the left. - I'm Eric Bates! Put me down! 460 00:36:25,082 --> 00:36:27,312 In the slammer, mammer. 461 00:36:32,523 --> 00:36:37,586 Jack! Let me out of here! Barkley, you're fired! 462 00:36:37,795 --> 00:36:39,922 Well-played. Congratulations. 463 00:36:40,131 --> 00:36:43,828 - Could you fix me a cheeseburger? - What's going on? 464 00:36:44,035 --> 00:36:46,697 - I didn't hear anything. - What's going on? 465 00:36:46,904 --> 00:36:50,135 He was driving down the steps. 466 00:36:50,341 --> 00:36:53,970 I don't want this job. I'm gonna lose it anyways. 467 00:36:54,178 --> 00:36:55,270 Dad! Dad! 468 00:36:56,147 --> 00:36:59,082 Calm down, calm down. Calm down! 469 00:36:59,283 --> 00:37:01,513 - What's going on? - It's my fault. 470 00:37:01,719 --> 00:37:03,550 - My fault, sir. - No, my fault. 471 00:37:03,754 --> 00:37:05,187 Yes, it's his fault. 472 00:37:05,523 --> 00:37:08,492 No, now Jack... Daddy, we were... 473 00:37:09,193 --> 00:37:11,218 ...just playing. 474 00:37:11,429 --> 00:37:15,923 - Right, Jack? - Yeah, we were just playing a game. 475 00:37:16,968 --> 00:37:18,663 Just playing, Daddy. 476 00:37:19,003 --> 00:37:22,996 Come on, Jack. Let's go play some more games. 477 00:37:23,374 --> 00:37:24,432 Come on, Jack. 478 00:37:26,277 --> 00:37:28,438 - Clean this up. - Yes, thank you. 479 00:37:28,646 --> 00:37:31,843 - There's a party about to happen. - Thank you. 480 00:37:35,186 --> 00:37:36,902 - Why did you stick up for me? - I want you to stay. 481 00:37:36,937 --> 00:37:38,619 - Why did you stick up for me? - I want you to stay. 482 00:37:38,823 --> 00:37:43,624 Why? Does it mean anything to you that I don't want to stay? 483 00:37:43,828 --> 00:37:47,730 - Lf you're paid enough, you'll stay. - That's not the question. 484 00:37:47,932 --> 00:37:50,560 Daddy's giving you a lot of money. 485 00:37:51,869 --> 00:37:56,397 That has no significance here. Understand? 486 00:37:56,607 --> 00:38:00,907 I am talking about, I have pets. I have friends. 487 00:38:01,112 --> 00:38:03,774 I got 16 plants, and my lady. 488 00:38:03,981 --> 00:38:07,144 - Your old lady won't mind. - My old lady? No. 489 00:38:07,351 --> 00:38:09,649 - My lady. - Put this on. 490 00:38:09,854 --> 00:38:12,982 A costume? This is for a short person. 491 00:38:13,190 --> 00:38:17,718 - I need something that fits. - I bought some for Barkley. 492 00:38:17,928 --> 00:38:20,624 - Maybe they'd fit you. - Maybe. 493 00:38:20,831 --> 00:38:22,765 - Let's go play a game. - "Let's go play a game." 494 00:38:22,967 --> 00:38:24,798 - Come on. - "Come on." 495 00:38:25,002 --> 00:38:27,027 "Got some for Barkley." 496 00:38:27,805 --> 00:38:31,866 Keep your hands up. Protect yourself at all times. 497 00:38:34,612 --> 00:38:36,079 Box the robot. 498 00:38:36,280 --> 00:38:39,875 This is better than Disneyland. You know that? 499 00:38:43,988 --> 00:38:48,288 Keep your hands up. Protect yourself at all times. 500 00:38:58,736 --> 00:39:02,228 Keep your hands up. Protect yourself at all times. 501 00:39:05,609 --> 00:39:07,770 Come on. Get up. 502 00:39:14,452 --> 00:39:15,976 Are you all right? 503 00:39:16,187 --> 00:39:18,246 Let's go play the game. 504 00:39:18,456 --> 00:39:21,016 - Foul! Foul! Foul! - What game? 505 00:39:21,225 --> 00:39:23,659 The air hockey game. Come on. 506 00:39:25,096 --> 00:39:27,894 You ready? I'm gonna win, right? 507 00:39:28,099 --> 00:39:32,502 - You're not gonna win. - Lf you win, you can go home with pay. 508 00:39:32,703 --> 00:39:34,227 - For the week? - Sure. 509 00:39:35,639 --> 00:39:39,837 - $2500 for a couple of hours? - Sure. Why not? 510 00:39:40,044 --> 00:39:44,606 - What's Money Bucks gonna think? - I can deal with my daddy. 511 00:39:44,849 --> 00:39:47,716 You can't deal with me. I was very good. 512 00:39:47,952 --> 00:39:49,476 I'm pretty good. 513 00:39:49,687 --> 00:39:54,056 Let's say every goal I get, you have to stay another year. 514 00:39:54,258 --> 00:39:56,852 - For every goal? Okay. - That's one year! 515 00:39:57,094 --> 00:39:59,562 - I wasn't ready. - So? I make the rules! 516 00:39:59,764 --> 00:40:02,130 - That's one year. - You cheat! 517 00:40:02,333 --> 00:40:04,665 - Two years. - I wasn't ready. 518 00:40:05,436 --> 00:40:09,805 I'm the king of ghetto hockey. You ain't gonna beat me. 519 00:40:11,275 --> 00:40:15,678 Watch it, watch it, watch it! Tricker! One year. That's one. 520 00:40:17,815 --> 00:40:21,114 - Come back. The game's not over. - I'm not playing. 521 00:40:21,318 --> 00:40:25,516 You're gonna quit because I was winning? You hate to lose? 522 00:40:25,723 --> 00:40:28,123 I don't feel like playing anymore. 523 00:40:28,325 --> 00:40:31,123 - What if I tell your dad? - He doesn't care. 524 00:40:31,328 --> 00:40:34,195 He doesn't care his son is a quitter? 525 00:40:34,398 --> 00:40:38,767 He doesn't care what I am, as long as I stay out of his way. 526 00:40:41,639 --> 00:40:45,439 - My little dove, it's bath time. - I'm busy. 527 00:40:45,643 --> 00:40:48,703 - Come on now. The water's ready. - No! 528 00:40:48,913 --> 00:40:51,211 Hello, Mr. Brown. 529 00:40:51,849 --> 00:40:54,943 - Now! This minute! - Not without my toy. 530 00:40:55,152 --> 00:40:58,019 Good boy. You want your submarine? 531 00:40:58,222 --> 00:41:03,091 - No. Jack. - Oh, no! I'll tell your father! 532 00:41:03,294 --> 00:41:05,854 Does everybody around here say that? 533 00:41:06,297 --> 00:41:08,595 I'm not gonna say it anymore. 534 00:41:11,769 --> 00:41:16,206 Not you. You can take a bath in my room and I'll wash you. 535 00:41:16,407 --> 00:41:19,843 - Meet you later. - My room is the second door... 536 00:41:20,044 --> 00:41:24,913 - What are you doing? - Wow, this is... Are you kidding me? 537 00:41:26,317 --> 00:41:29,514 I wanted a pool but Dad said it was dangerous. 538 00:41:29,720 --> 00:41:32,587 - It's great. Look at all... - Don't touch! 539 00:41:32,790 --> 00:41:35,884 It's Mr. Bates' collection and I'm in charge. 540 00:41:36,093 --> 00:41:39,824 Now, Eric, you get in the tub. And you, out! 541 00:41:40,030 --> 00:41:44,467 Eric, you're too big to bathe with another naked man! 542 00:41:44,668 --> 00:41:48,331 She's right. You shouldn't bathe with a naked man. 543 00:41:48,539 --> 00:41:51,133 I forbid you! Oh, God! 544 00:41:51,342 --> 00:41:53,003 Here we go! 545 00:41:53,210 --> 00:41:56,202 - Oh, my God! - Do my back. 546 00:41:56,847 --> 00:41:58,576 Mr. Bates! 547 00:41:59,116 --> 00:42:04,247 It Came from the Tub, starring Eric Bates as "It." 548 00:42:04,455 --> 00:42:05,615 I like you. 549 00:42:12,997 --> 00:42:14,123 No, you don't! 550 00:42:18,936 --> 00:42:23,305 Let me guess. You're the new second-floor sprinkler system. 551 00:42:23,507 --> 00:42:27,603 I'm Jack Brown. I'm sorry I messed up your carpet. 552 00:42:27,811 --> 00:42:31,110 I wouldn't think this would tickle a grown man. 553 00:42:31,315 --> 00:42:32,373 Amazing. 554 00:42:34,184 --> 00:42:36,982 What people will do for money. 555 00:42:50,634 --> 00:42:52,431 Who do they think they are? 556 00:43:06,350 --> 00:43:10,787 I'll kill him. I'll pull his head off. I'll get him! 557 00:43:15,359 --> 00:43:19,557 - Well, here they are now. - Hi, U.S. How are you? 558 00:43:19,763 --> 00:43:22,857 I'm fine. How are you? 559 00:43:23,968 --> 00:43:27,529 - Fancy, you look so good tonight. - Hi, sugar-pie! 560 00:43:27,738 --> 00:43:32,698 I'm glad to see you. Look at those bracelets. Where did you get them? 561 00:43:32,910 --> 00:43:34,377 These old things? 562 00:43:34,578 --> 00:43:38,571 The word I get is that they're going to indict you. 563 00:43:38,782 --> 00:43:41,410 Oh. State or federal? 564 00:43:41,619 --> 00:43:46,647 Federal. Now where's that limey of yours with the bourbon? 565 00:43:46,857 --> 00:43:48,552 Barkley! 566 00:43:49,093 --> 00:43:52,028 Your bourbon, my lords. 567 00:43:52,663 --> 00:43:55,154 Thank you, my lords. 568 00:43:59,370 --> 00:44:04,273 A federal case? Maybe we ought to run a little party for the senator. 569 00:44:04,475 --> 00:44:09,538 I always thought that they conducted their proms in an excellent manner. 570 00:44:09,747 --> 00:44:13,683 It used to be my pleasure to buy the band uniforms. 571 00:44:13,884 --> 00:44:16,944 And each year, we'd have a different color. 572 00:44:17,154 --> 00:44:20,681 Do you know why they're having a party downstairs? 573 00:44:20,891 --> 00:44:24,156 Because it's goodbye for you guys. 574 00:44:24,361 --> 00:44:28,161 It's called a "wrap party." This is all for you guys. 575 00:44:28,365 --> 00:44:30,333 They're not selling you anymore. 576 00:44:30,534 --> 00:44:34,061 They got a new toy to sell called the "Jack Brown." 577 00:44:34,271 --> 00:44:37,035 Me, the wind-up asshole. Yes, that's me. 578 00:44:37,241 --> 00:44:41,075 I'm taking over all of the stores next Christmas. 579 00:44:41,278 --> 00:44:46,409 Kids will holler for me. They won't want no teddy bears like you. 580 00:44:46,617 --> 00:44:50,314 And they won't want no sad pandas. And no camels. 581 00:44:50,521 --> 00:44:53,217 No tigers, leopards, lions, rabbits. 582 00:44:53,424 --> 00:44:58,487 And orangutans. You understand? Kids will want a Jack Brown wind-up. 583 00:44:58,696 --> 00:45:04,032 "Mommy, I want a Jack Brown wind-up. Suzy's can play basketball. 584 00:45:04,234 --> 00:45:06,896 Otto's can drive a Cadillac. 585 00:45:07,104 --> 00:45:10,471 He's real cute too and I want to pinch his nose." 586 00:45:10,674 --> 00:45:15,668 That's what I've done to myself. I sold out to Morehouse, you know? 587 00:45:16,213 --> 00:45:21,150 I'll end up in this room with all you toys for the rest of my life. 588 00:45:27,825 --> 00:45:29,759 What the hell is that? 589 00:45:33,797 --> 00:45:36,459 Jesus! What the... 590 00:45:37,034 --> 00:45:38,501 Why... 591 00:45:40,404 --> 00:45:44,306 You think that's funny? What do you think of this? 592 00:45:44,508 --> 00:45:48,000 Goodbye! I want my clothes! 593 00:45:48,712 --> 00:45:51,340 "Goodbye! I want my clothes!" 594 00:45:51,548 --> 00:45:53,277 I want my clothes! 595 00:45:53,717 --> 00:45:55,582 I want my clothes! 596 00:45:57,488 --> 00:46:01,447 - I'm not kidding! - "I want my clothes! I'm not kidding!" 597 00:46:06,430 --> 00:46:11,333 - I want my clothes. - Mr. Brown. Now sit down for a minute. 598 00:46:11,535 --> 00:46:14,834 They're in the dryer, and they're all wet. 599 00:46:15,038 --> 00:46:18,439 Now tell me something. Are you brown all over? 600 00:46:18,642 --> 00:46:23,978 You can talk dirty, if you like. I'll jump on top of you. 601 00:46:24,181 --> 00:46:28,641 How disgusting for him to force himself into my room. Go to bed! 602 00:46:29,486 --> 00:46:30,578 - Jack! - What? 603 00:46:30,788 --> 00:46:32,085 - Where you going? - Home. 604 00:46:32,289 --> 00:46:35,656 - Why? - Are you that dumb, kid? 605 00:46:35,859 --> 00:46:38,657 - Jesus! - Aren't we full of surprises? 606 00:46:38,862 --> 00:46:44,095 I'm looking for the laundry room. Frنulein's got my clothes. 607 00:46:44,301 --> 00:46:48,101 Yes, the laundry room. Why don't you just follow me? 608 00:46:48,305 --> 00:46:51,900 - See you, Eric. Thanks very much. - You're welcome. 609 00:46:53,777 --> 00:46:56,905 Excuse me. May I have your attention? 610 00:46:58,081 --> 00:47:02,313 I just wanted you all to see what U.S. Bought his boy today. 611 00:47:02,519 --> 00:47:06,046 It doesn't even need batteries. Isn't that sweet? 612 00:47:06,256 --> 00:47:10,590 I hope it'll start a trend to solve the unemployment situation. 613 00:47:10,794 --> 00:47:14,821 If y'all want one for your children, we're taking orders... 614 00:47:15,032 --> 00:47:18,160 - We gotta talk. - U.S., can't you take a joke? 615 00:47:18,368 --> 00:47:22,134 - I'm embarrassed! - That wasn't remotely amusing. 616 00:47:23,040 --> 00:47:26,840 - Not remotely amusing. - You're marking my arm, sugar. 617 00:47:27,044 --> 00:47:30,480 I thought three weeks with that shrink would do. 618 00:47:30,681 --> 00:47:33,980 You gotta spend some quiet time at the hospital. 619 00:47:34,184 --> 00:47:38,985 I'm sorry. I was bragging. You liked for me to brag on you. 620 00:47:39,823 --> 00:47:41,154 Let loose of me. 621 00:47:41,358 --> 00:47:45,658 You gonna deal with what happened? Your wife embarrassed me! 622 00:47:45,863 --> 00:47:47,797 So? You're getting paid. 623 00:47:47,998 --> 00:47:51,832 It's your bedtime. Put your toy away and go to sleep. 624 00:47:52,035 --> 00:47:55,732 - You, come with me. - You can't pay me enough money! 625 00:47:56,473 --> 00:47:57,770 You'll get yours. 626 00:48:04,081 --> 00:48:06,345 - Son of a... - You can't leave! 627 00:48:06,550 --> 00:48:09,018 - I can't? - In your pajamas? 628 00:48:09,219 --> 00:48:13,451 - Frنulein's got my clothes. - You won't get your money. 629 00:48:13,657 --> 00:48:18,890 Money? You're not hearing me. I was embarrassed and humiliated! 630 00:48:19,096 --> 00:48:21,963 You acted like money was important. 631 00:48:22,165 --> 00:48:25,259 - I was wrong! - Was I bad? 632 00:48:25,469 --> 00:48:30,099 Were you bad? What you were gave a new meaning to the word "bad." 633 00:48:30,307 --> 00:48:32,798 Stop! Don't go out that door! 634 00:48:33,010 --> 00:48:36,946 There's parking people out front, and they'll laugh. 635 00:48:39,683 --> 00:48:41,446 Go out the side door. 636 00:48:42,686 --> 00:48:46,645 You sure? Listen to me, you're something else, man. 637 00:48:46,857 --> 00:48:48,825 You never cease to amaze me. 638 00:48:49,026 --> 00:48:53,656 Each time I think you're a rotten kid, you do something real nice. 639 00:48:54,765 --> 00:48:58,531 - Thanks, pal. Take it easy. - So long. 640 00:48:58,735 --> 00:49:00,669 - Bye. - Bye-bye, Eric. 641 00:49:04,374 --> 00:49:07,537 Eric! Open this door, you little shit! 642 00:49:10,714 --> 00:49:14,480 - Should we do something? - What else can go wrong? 643 00:49:14,685 --> 00:49:18,212 Probably a short-circuited wire or something. 644 00:49:19,957 --> 00:49:21,982 Open the door, you bastard! 645 00:49:39,977 --> 00:49:43,276 - He might be armed and dangerous! - Negro! 646 00:49:43,480 --> 00:49:47,439 - Grab him. Probably on drugs. - Bet he got out of prison. 647 00:49:50,887 --> 00:49:54,721 - Hey! Watch my car! - He's high on marijuana, I bet! 648 00:50:25,022 --> 00:50:28,423 It's only a fault in the electrical system, I'm sure. 649 00:50:46,777 --> 00:50:51,441 - Well, Rasputin, what's next? - I want to go back to school. 650 00:50:52,115 --> 00:50:55,346 - Before the end of spring vacation? - Tonight. 651 00:50:55,619 --> 00:50:58,850 - But this is my week. - I knew you wouldn't let me. 652 00:51:00,323 --> 00:51:04,089 What's wrong? What happened? Are you disappointed... 653 00:51:04,294 --> 00:51:06,319 ...that I didn't drown? 654 00:51:06,530 --> 00:51:10,557 It's always my fault. Well, it wasn't. It was Fancy's. 655 00:51:10,767 --> 00:51:14,396 She didn't have to take him down and get him embarrassed. 656 00:51:15,005 --> 00:51:17,940 Now he won't come back no matter how much you pay. 657 00:51:18,141 --> 00:51:22,737 I don't want to stay because I don't have anyone to play with! 658 00:51:23,180 --> 00:51:27,776 Don't, Dad! I want him back! Don't! I want Jack back. 659 00:51:27,984 --> 00:51:33,251 Please, Daddy. Please get me Jack back. Please! 660 00:51:44,267 --> 00:51:46,428 They've come for the pajamas. 661 00:51:49,539 --> 00:51:51,336 Just a minute! 662 00:52:08,492 --> 00:52:10,119 - Please, Mr. Brown! - No. 663 00:52:10,327 --> 00:52:13,455 - The kid needs a shrink. - I agree with you. 664 00:52:13,663 --> 00:52:19,124 I take a little something so I can sleep, and tonight I took two. 665 00:52:19,536 --> 00:52:20,730 And he told me... 666 00:52:20,937 --> 00:52:25,465 ...that I either do what he wants or I can look for another job. 667 00:52:25,675 --> 00:52:28,644 Please, open this envelope. Just look at it. 668 00:52:28,845 --> 00:52:29,971 Come on. No. 669 00:52:31,748 --> 00:52:32,874 Please. 670 00:52:34,518 --> 00:52:37,282 No. This is my house. 671 00:52:37,988 --> 00:52:39,455 Let me say something. 672 00:52:39,656 --> 00:52:43,148 It doesn't matter the compensation. The answer is no! 673 00:52:43,393 --> 00:52:47,557 Can I say something to you? I admire your moral fiber. 674 00:52:53,470 --> 00:52:55,700 Ten thousand dollars! 675 00:52:57,440 --> 00:53:01,399 $10,000? For a week or the rest of my life? 676 00:53:01,611 --> 00:53:04,808 - He only has the kid for a week. - $10,000? 677 00:53:07,984 --> 00:53:10,748 Jack, now we can buy the house! 678 00:53:10,954 --> 00:53:13,354 Come in. We'll discuss moral fiber. 679 00:53:13,557 --> 00:53:16,856 Yes, Mr. Morehouse. Jack, we're gonna buy a house! 680 00:53:17,060 --> 00:53:18,925 - Want to take a nap? - Yes. 681 00:53:19,129 --> 00:53:22,326 We were about to make love. You can join in. 682 00:53:45,622 --> 00:53:47,089 Welcome home! 683 00:53:54,464 --> 00:53:58,491 Mr. Brown, I'll make it pleasant. I will scrub your back. 684 00:53:58,702 --> 00:54:01,603 - I will draw a bath for you. - Get it ready! 685 00:54:01,805 --> 00:54:05,502 - I'll see you in 10 years. - 10 years? Who needs it then? 686 00:54:27,464 --> 00:54:28,453 Morning, Barkley! 687 00:54:28,632 --> 00:54:33,296 You're up early this morning. Or didn't you go to bed last night? 688 00:54:33,503 --> 00:54:35,368 I went to bed. Is this Jack's? 689 00:54:35,572 --> 00:54:37,597 Yes, this is his breakfast. 690 00:54:37,841 --> 00:54:40,810 One, two, one, two... Thank you. 691 00:54:43,613 --> 00:54:45,012 Come in. 692 00:54:46,149 --> 00:54:49,607 Here's your breakfast. How are you this morning? 693 00:54:49,819 --> 00:54:52,310 Fine, sir. Good. Wonderful. 694 00:54:52,522 --> 00:54:56,481 Better than the dinner I gave you on the floor last night. 695 00:54:56,693 --> 00:54:58,024 Oh, this is great. 696 00:54:59,829 --> 00:55:02,389 Where would you like it? Near the window? 697 00:55:02,599 --> 00:55:04,362 Anybody seen the little monster this morning? 698 00:55:04,567 --> 00:55:06,728 Do you want me to find him? 699 00:55:06,936 --> 00:55:10,770 He's a pain in the derrière, I can tell you that. 700 00:55:10,974 --> 00:55:13,636 - Yes, well, bye-bye. - Bye-bye, sir. 701 00:55:34,464 --> 00:55:35,590 What the...! 702 00:55:36,933 --> 00:55:39,925 I've had it! I've had it with you! 703 00:55:40,136 --> 00:55:41,933 - This is it! - Put me down! 704 00:55:43,073 --> 00:55:44,062 This is it! 705 00:55:44,274 --> 00:55:47,437 - No! No! - Put me down! 706 00:55:48,845 --> 00:55:51,143 What the hell is this? 707 00:55:51,348 --> 00:55:54,215 Let me go! Don't spank me, Jack. 708 00:55:54,417 --> 00:55:56,112 Please don't! 709 00:55:59,289 --> 00:56:00,551 What's wrong? 710 00:56:00,757 --> 00:56:04,352 What's wrong? Why the hell did you pick me? 711 00:56:04,761 --> 00:56:08,094 You made me laugh. I wanted a friend who made me laugh. 712 00:56:08,298 --> 00:56:10,459 Of all the things in the store, you wanted a friend? 713 00:56:10,667 --> 00:56:13,727 If you want a friend, you don't buy a friend. 714 00:56:13,937 --> 00:56:17,839 You earn a friend. You know, with love and trust. 715 00:56:18,041 --> 00:56:21,772 I mean, you don't throw firecrackers at them. 716 00:56:21,978 --> 00:56:24,708 You don't dump stuff on their head. 717 00:56:24,914 --> 00:56:27,712 You don't throw their food on the floor. 718 00:56:27,917 --> 00:56:29,885 I've had enough of your routine. 719 00:56:30,086 --> 00:56:34,079 You love a friend, you know? You earn a friend. 720 00:56:35,258 --> 00:56:36,520 Come see my train. 721 00:56:36,726 --> 00:56:39,024 Didn't you listen to me? 722 00:56:39,229 --> 00:56:41,720 You don't order your friends around. 723 00:56:41,931 --> 00:56:44,297 If you have a friend, you ask them. 724 00:56:44,701 --> 00:56:45,690 Sorry. 725 00:56:45,902 --> 00:56:49,394 Would you like to come see my train, friend? 726 00:56:57,313 --> 00:56:58,905 I'm gonna kill you. 727 00:56:59,115 --> 00:57:01,015 I love you, Jack. 728 00:57:20,870 --> 00:57:24,135 We've got four more days. What'll we do? 729 00:57:24,340 --> 00:57:26,433 Oh, I don't know. Play? 730 00:57:27,076 --> 00:57:30,944 - Let's do something interesting. - Watch this. 731 00:57:39,956 --> 00:57:44,825 Hey, I know what. We'll start a newspaper. You can be a reporter. 732 00:57:45,028 --> 00:57:46,427 Boring. 733 00:57:46,896 --> 00:57:48,363 Come on, man. 734 00:57:48,565 --> 00:57:51,591 Listen, I'll be the editor and you be the reporter. 735 00:57:51,801 --> 00:57:53,928 I'll call you "Scoop." 736 00:57:54,137 --> 00:57:56,128 Yeah, and you can take pictures. 737 00:57:56,339 --> 00:57:59,706 You got a Kodak you haven't taken out of the box. 738 00:58:01,444 --> 00:58:05,244 Heaven forbid you might learn something useful. 739 00:58:05,448 --> 00:58:07,348 - Boring. - Boring? 740 00:58:07,550 --> 00:58:10,849 All this is not boring? All this garbage? 741 00:58:11,087 --> 00:58:13,351 Look around! You kidding me? 742 00:58:13,590 --> 00:58:18,027 I mean, all these people kissing your ass isn't boring? 743 00:58:19,362 --> 00:58:22,456 I have an idea. You want to go fishing? 744 00:58:22,665 --> 00:58:24,565 For fish? 745 00:58:24,901 --> 00:58:29,668 We used to have all the hoi polloi from town in this stream. 746 00:58:30,373 --> 00:58:34,969 Swimming, picnicking, leaving their beer cans all over the place. 747 00:58:35,178 --> 00:58:37,203 So Daddy bought some piranhas. 748 00:58:37,413 --> 00:58:41,440 The first week, a cow went in there. All gone. 749 00:58:41,651 --> 00:58:43,243 Somebody's cow got eaten. 750 00:58:43,453 --> 00:58:45,944 I gotta pull my boots up real high. 751 00:58:46,155 --> 00:58:48,988 Because the bullshit's getting thick. Piranhas? 752 00:58:49,192 --> 00:58:50,750 I'm not kidding! 753 00:58:50,960 --> 00:58:54,589 - Piranhas are South American. - I'm not going in there. 754 00:58:54,797 --> 00:58:56,856 I'm going in there because... 755 00:58:57,066 --> 00:58:59,967 ...you put a whoopee cushion under me. 756 00:59:00,169 --> 00:59:04,071 There's nothing here. No piranhas! 757 00:59:04,274 --> 00:59:08,074 I'm not kidding you! There are piranhas in there. 758 00:59:08,278 --> 00:59:10,473 Come on. Get out! 759 00:59:10,680 --> 00:59:13,672 Damn you! Do you see any piranhas? 760 00:59:20,690 --> 00:59:22,157 Come on, Jack. Get... 761 00:59:26,829 --> 00:59:30,595 Come on! You don't believe me? 762 00:59:32,635 --> 00:59:34,694 You didn't believe me, right? 763 00:59:36,806 --> 00:59:40,105 I'll never doubt your word again. They're murderers! 764 00:59:40,310 --> 00:59:42,972 - Shut up! - What? 765 00:59:43,179 --> 00:59:46,842 - Hold the noise down. - Who the hell was that? 766 00:59:50,587 --> 00:59:51,815 Mr. Morehouse. 767 00:59:57,393 --> 01:00:01,295 I came down to do a little fishing this afternoon... 768 01:00:01,497 --> 01:00:03,055 ...because I had a... 769 01:00:03,266 --> 01:00:07,100 ...difficult morning. - You had a difficult morning? 770 01:00:07,804 --> 01:00:09,999 I had to let Mr. Geffran... 771 01:00:10,206 --> 01:00:12,106 ...head of accounting, go. 772 01:00:13,576 --> 01:00:18,138 He was pushy, Eric. He insisted on shaking hands with your father. 773 01:00:18,348 --> 01:00:20,942 - So what? - He has very sweaty hands. 774 01:00:21,150 --> 01:00:22,947 Very sweaty hands. 775 01:00:23,152 --> 01:00:25,416 Your father said... 776 01:00:25,622 --> 01:00:27,556 ...get rid of him. 777 01:00:28,825 --> 01:00:32,090 He fired a man because he had sweaty hands? 778 01:00:32,295 --> 01:00:34,490 No, he made me do it. 779 01:00:35,365 --> 01:00:38,732 Good man. Father and husband. Mortgage. 780 01:00:38,935 --> 01:00:41,495 Mr. Morehouse, you gonna be all right? 781 01:00:41,704 --> 01:00:42,932 Yeah. 782 01:00:43,439 --> 01:00:44,804 We gotta go. 783 01:00:47,510 --> 01:00:49,444 Good luck, Mr. Morehouse. 784 01:00:51,748 --> 01:00:55,309 You know, we could tell. We could get even. 785 01:00:55,518 --> 01:00:57,247 Who we gonna tell, God? 786 01:00:57,587 --> 01:01:01,148 What are you gonna say? "Hey, God! Life's unfair." 787 01:01:01,357 --> 01:01:04,349 You know what he's gonna say? "Tough titty." 788 01:01:04,560 --> 01:01:06,551 No, in our newspaper. 789 01:01:07,563 --> 01:01:10,225 We're not doing a newspaper, remember? 790 01:01:10,433 --> 01:01:14,995 We could interview Fancy, Barkley and everybody. 791 01:01:15,438 --> 01:01:18,703 They wouldn't talk to us. They work for your dad. 792 01:01:18,908 --> 01:01:20,705 You can make them talk. 793 01:01:22,045 --> 01:01:24,377 Didn't you see All the President's Men? 794 01:01:24,580 --> 01:01:27,879 Reporters make people talk, if they're any good. 795 01:01:28,151 --> 01:01:30,745 You told me you were good. I believe you... 796 01:01:30,953 --> 01:01:34,753 ...so we're gonna start a newspaper. Let's shove off. 797 01:01:37,360 --> 01:01:38,987 I want to be the editor. 798 01:01:39,195 --> 01:01:41,493 I wanna call you "Scoop." 799 01:01:42,031 --> 01:01:43,794 Shut up before I let you go. 800 01:01:44,000 --> 01:01:45,262 Don't let go. 801 01:01:47,036 --> 01:01:50,733 You don't know anything about running a newspaper. 802 01:01:50,940 --> 01:01:52,464 You got that, Scoop? 803 01:01:52,675 --> 01:01:54,074 Quit calling me "Scoop." 804 01:01:54,277 --> 01:01:56,507 Just because your dad owns one... 805 01:01:56,713 --> 01:01:59,511 ...doesn't mean you can run one, does it? 806 01:01:59,716 --> 01:02:01,240 I hate typing. 807 01:02:01,451 --> 01:02:05,581 I hate you calling me "Scoop." I want to be the editor. 808 01:02:05,788 --> 01:02:08,256 You're doing it by yourself, champ. 809 01:02:11,194 --> 01:02:12,957 I'm doing it myself! 810 01:02:13,429 --> 01:02:17,525 I'm doing it myself! I'm doing it myself! 811 01:02:17,734 --> 01:02:20,294 Jack... Jack... I'm gonna fall. 812 01:02:20,570 --> 01:02:22,765 I got you. I got you. I got you! 813 01:02:23,973 --> 01:02:25,838 I got you! You give up? 814 01:02:26,042 --> 01:02:30,911 One, two, three, that's all! I was robbed! This guy is... 815 01:02:32,248 --> 01:02:34,614 You're nuts, but I love you. 816 01:02:36,853 --> 01:02:41,119 Eric! Come on, Scoop. Get up! Time to go to work. 817 01:02:41,324 --> 01:02:45,158 - Come on, I just... - Come on, Scoop. Hey, wait! 818 01:02:45,361 --> 01:02:50,025 Just a minute, my friend. I'm gonna take your picture for the paper. 819 01:02:50,233 --> 01:02:52,428 All right. Say "cheese." 820 01:02:56,973 --> 01:02:59,840 Jack, I'm gonna get you for this! 821 01:03:00,042 --> 01:03:01,475 You're in for it. 822 01:03:09,452 --> 01:03:11,852 Couldn't we get these in a 40-Iow? 823 01:03:12,054 --> 01:03:14,682 Come on, Jack. I'll race you for a beer. 824 01:03:14,891 --> 01:03:17,052 The last one in is a rotten egg. 825 01:03:17,260 --> 01:03:19,956 Come on, Jack. You gotta let me win this. 826 01:03:20,163 --> 01:03:22,529 Come on. Don't do that to me. 827 01:03:22,732 --> 01:03:25,360 Let's go up there, man, and take a rest. 828 01:03:32,975 --> 01:03:34,203 Careful. It's hot. 829 01:03:34,410 --> 01:03:37,004 - Race you up to the top of the hill. - Okay. 830 01:03:37,680 --> 01:03:39,910 First one up is a rotten egg. 831 01:03:43,219 --> 01:03:46,677 If my father's rotten, does it mean I'll be rotten too? 832 01:03:46,889 --> 01:03:48,288 Probably. 833 01:03:48,491 --> 01:03:51,949 - What if I don't want to be? - You can't do much about it. 834 01:03:52,161 --> 01:03:55,824 You're hopelessly locked in. You can't avert it. 835 01:03:56,032 --> 01:03:58,694 If you're hopeless too, I don't mind. 836 01:03:59,602 --> 01:04:00,864 What's Angela like? 837 01:04:01,070 --> 01:04:05,200 I thought we were talking about your father. 838 01:04:05,708 --> 01:04:07,107 What's she like? 839 01:04:08,845 --> 01:04:10,369 She's like America. 840 01:04:10,580 --> 01:04:13,674 She loves to fight. A good fighter. 841 01:04:13,883 --> 01:04:17,046 She loves to take on chemical companies. Like that. 842 01:04:17,253 --> 01:04:21,986 Stuff that pollutes the world. And she loves the underdog. 843 01:04:23,025 --> 01:04:26,392 And she loves to be filled with righteous indignation. 844 01:04:26,596 --> 01:04:30,930 She's pretty wonderful. Probably what your father would call a pinko. 845 01:04:31,234 --> 01:04:33,498 Do you mate a lot? 846 01:04:33,703 --> 01:04:36,536 What? Animals mate. 847 01:04:36,739 --> 01:04:39,333 Well, you know, go to bed... Make it. 848 01:04:39,542 --> 01:04:43,069 - It's none of your damn business. - What's it like? 849 01:04:43,279 --> 01:04:45,975 Doesn't anybody talk to you, like your father? 850 01:04:46,182 --> 01:04:49,049 What do you do with your... 851 01:04:49,252 --> 01:04:50,276 ...thing? 852 01:04:50,486 --> 01:04:51,919 What do you do... 853 01:04:52,121 --> 01:04:56,080 Is this a hypothetical question or is there a lady involved? 854 01:04:57,193 --> 01:04:59,388 Somebody going to your school? 855 01:04:59,595 --> 01:05:02,120 There's only boys in my school, dummy. 856 01:05:02,331 --> 01:05:03,730 What's her name? 857 01:05:08,337 --> 01:05:11,534 - Megan. - Megan. You like her? 858 01:05:11,841 --> 01:05:13,775 Yeah. She goes to St. Mary's. 859 01:05:13,976 --> 01:05:17,377 We have stupid parties with them all the time. 860 01:05:18,047 --> 01:05:21,141 Know what to do next time you have a party? 861 01:05:21,350 --> 01:05:25,377 You go up to her, very gently. Take her by the hand... 862 01:05:25,588 --> 01:05:30,616 ...gently. You kinda pull her to you and you jump on her bones. 863 01:05:30,826 --> 01:05:32,350 Oh, come on, Jack! 864 01:05:32,561 --> 01:05:36,361 - Are you serious? No kidding around? - No. 865 01:05:38,034 --> 01:05:39,626 Why don't you call her? 866 01:05:39,835 --> 01:05:41,928 Play bingo or something. 867 01:05:42,138 --> 01:05:46,234 Buy her a puppy. Get her some ice cream. Play tiddlywinks. 868 01:05:46,442 --> 01:05:49,639 Jack, you're asking for it again. 869 01:05:52,014 --> 01:05:54,812 Show her how much money you have. 870 01:05:55,017 --> 01:05:58,544 Tell her you're from the Bates Millionaire Club. 871 01:05:58,754 --> 01:06:01,348 Why won't anybody tell me? 872 01:06:02,558 --> 01:06:04,651 I was just kidding, man. 873 01:06:11,167 --> 01:06:14,534 Listen, you gotta be nice to her. 874 01:06:15,972 --> 01:06:19,874 Tell her how you really feel. Take a chance. 875 01:06:20,076 --> 01:06:22,943 Stop being so tough. They don't like that. 876 01:06:23,145 --> 01:06:26,672 Women like it when you're sincere. They respond too. 877 01:06:26,882 --> 01:06:29,680 She'll look in your face, check out your eyes. 878 01:06:29,885 --> 01:06:33,480 She'd really like you if you'd show her what you're made of. 879 01:06:33,689 --> 01:06:35,589 Do you know what I mean? 880 01:06:35,791 --> 01:06:38,487 And don't worry about your thing. 881 01:06:38,694 --> 01:06:40,889 Plenty of time for that. 882 01:06:41,097 --> 01:06:44,555 Just show her some of your heart, what you're made of. 883 01:06:44,767 --> 01:06:47,099 You're made of a lot, you know. 884 01:06:51,107 --> 01:06:53,075 Yeah, but the guys at school say... 885 01:06:53,275 --> 01:06:56,802 ...if you don't make it with a girl a week, you'll go nuts. 886 01:06:57,013 --> 01:06:58,378 They're nuts. 887 01:06:59,115 --> 01:07:01,015 Don't you know that? 888 01:07:01,217 --> 01:07:05,119 Don't you know that physical love is the easy part? 889 01:07:05,321 --> 01:07:09,849 The hard part is loving somebody with your heart. 890 01:07:10,226 --> 01:07:11,921 That's the hard part. 891 01:07:12,128 --> 01:07:15,222 Yeah, but... I love her with my heart. 892 01:07:15,431 --> 01:07:19,868 Well, do you ever tell her, "I love you with all my heart"? 893 01:07:20,069 --> 01:07:25,166 No. But I'm definitely gonna tell her that I love her with all my heart. 894 01:07:25,374 --> 01:07:27,808 And then you're gonna jump her bones? 895 01:07:28,010 --> 01:07:32,208 You gonna jump her bones? Are you gonna jump her bones? 896 01:07:34,650 --> 01:07:37,244 Eric and I are gonna start a newspaper tomorrow. 897 01:07:37,453 --> 01:07:39,785 I just love educational toys. 898 01:07:41,524 --> 01:07:44,049 I'll show him how to do an interview... 899 01:07:44,260 --> 01:07:46,854 ...and put it into newspaper form. 900 01:07:47,063 --> 01:07:50,863 Use his camera. He has a photocopier in his room. 901 01:07:51,067 --> 01:07:53,729 It's a shame to waste that equipment. 902 01:07:53,936 --> 01:07:55,961 Wonderful. Splendid. 903 01:07:56,172 --> 01:07:59,767 I was wondering if you'd tell us how you and your wife met. 904 01:07:59,975 --> 01:08:02,705 And we'd sorta do a practice run on you. 905 01:08:02,912 --> 01:08:05,745 You'll have to practice on someone else. 906 01:08:05,948 --> 01:08:08,473 - Daddy? - It's just for your son, sir. 907 01:08:08,684 --> 01:08:12,142 It's not like everybody doesn't know already. 908 01:08:12,988 --> 01:08:15,456 Around here. But the boy... 909 01:08:17,560 --> 01:08:19,790 Are you ashamed of me? 910 01:08:20,896 --> 01:08:23,262 It's just the sweetest story. 911 01:08:23,466 --> 01:08:24,524 I love it. 912 01:08:24,733 --> 01:08:27,600 It's exactly like Cinderella. 913 01:08:29,805 --> 01:08:31,170 Off the record? 914 01:08:31,373 --> 01:08:34,968 - You give me your word? - Absolutely. Off the record. 915 01:08:44,854 --> 01:08:46,412 Go ahead, sugar. 916 01:08:47,089 --> 01:08:51,856 Well, U.S. Was on his way home from Colorado, visiting Numero Two. 917 01:08:52,061 --> 01:08:54,621 She's in a loony bin in Colorado Springs. 918 01:08:54,830 --> 01:08:58,231 What I was doing in Colorado is irrelevant. 919 01:08:58,434 --> 01:09:03,235 It's where I might be shortly. I think it's real relevant. 920 01:09:03,439 --> 01:09:07,375 You know, I don't believe you know how to tell a story. 921 01:09:08,377 --> 01:09:10,845 She was a little-bitty thing. 922 01:09:11,046 --> 01:09:12,877 Scrawny, scared... 923 01:09:13,082 --> 01:09:16,882 ...wobbling on platform sandals. 924 01:09:18,654 --> 01:09:21,987 She was the newest, the youngest... 925 01:09:22,191 --> 01:09:25,490 ...and the worst waitress in the bar. 926 01:09:25,694 --> 01:09:28,720 It was a little bar outside of Amarillo, Texas. 927 01:09:28,931 --> 01:09:30,990 Right next to a motel. 928 01:09:31,800 --> 01:09:34,064 I remember she was... 929 01:09:34,403 --> 01:09:38,840 ...wearing some kind of rayon-like uniform. 930 01:09:39,041 --> 01:09:41,271 It hardly covered her. 931 01:09:41,477 --> 01:09:44,969 With some kind of metal things on the front. 932 01:09:45,181 --> 01:09:46,739 Propellers. 933 01:09:47,650 --> 01:09:50,847 Propellers? Is that what they were? 934 01:09:51,687 --> 01:09:53,780 You didn't know that? 935 01:09:54,223 --> 01:09:59,251 The place was called the Fly-By- Nite. The motif was airplanes. 936 01:09:59,461 --> 01:10:04,160 All this time you didn't know my metal things were propellers? 937 01:10:04,366 --> 01:10:07,961 You're the one who doesn't know how to tell a story. 938 01:10:09,305 --> 01:10:11,671 U.S. Came through that door... 939 01:10:12,074 --> 01:10:15,601 ...like the archangel Gabriel. 940 01:10:15,811 --> 01:10:19,338 And he lifted me out of all that misery. 941 01:10:19,548 --> 01:10:21,482 And he gave me new hair. 942 01:10:21,684 --> 01:10:24,551 And then he gave me new boobs. 943 01:10:24,753 --> 01:10:26,277 And a mink coat. 944 01:10:26,488 --> 01:10:28,615 And a pink Continental. 945 01:10:28,824 --> 01:10:31,657 And a charge card at Neiman's. 946 01:10:31,860 --> 01:10:36,297 And I swear, if you don't believe in prayers and miracles... 947 01:10:36,498 --> 01:10:38,830 ...all you gotta do is look at me. 948 01:10:39,034 --> 01:10:40,023 I mean... 949 01:10:40,202 --> 01:10:42,261 ...I am living proof. 950 01:10:45,975 --> 01:10:48,842 What did your boobs look like before? 951 01:10:54,883 --> 01:10:57,215 Don't touch that table. 952 01:10:59,355 --> 01:11:01,050 Now get the camera ready. 953 01:11:01,257 --> 01:11:02,554 Stand over here. 954 01:11:03,125 --> 01:11:05,423 And don't forget to focus. Okay? 955 01:11:05,628 --> 01:11:07,118 Sit in Daddy's chair. 956 01:11:07,329 --> 01:11:09,889 Why? I don't want to be in the picture. 957 01:11:14,903 --> 01:11:17,497 What did you turn the light on for? 958 01:11:17,706 --> 01:11:20,504 Hit the button on the left of the drawer. 959 01:11:28,017 --> 01:11:29,507 I'm waiting. 960 01:11:45,267 --> 01:11:46,962 Spoilsport. 961 01:11:53,208 --> 01:11:56,803 Your father is very strange. Now take the picture. 962 01:11:57,012 --> 01:11:58,912 Okay, duck. 963 01:12:01,583 --> 01:12:05,178 Now turn out the light. Let's get out of here. 964 01:12:08,057 --> 01:12:10,150 I can't take you anywhere! 965 01:12:11,493 --> 01:12:13,461 Be careful of the table. 966 01:12:13,696 --> 01:12:15,061 Let's get out. 967 01:12:25,240 --> 01:12:29,301 - Why did you stop? - My dominoes just went down. 968 01:12:30,646 --> 01:12:34,844 He says, "You're responsible for the lunchroom." You know him. 969 01:12:35,050 --> 01:12:38,918 I said, "Sure, yes. What'd you think? You know that." 970 01:12:39,121 --> 01:12:42,784 And he said, "You let that black man serve." 971 01:12:42,991 --> 01:12:46,984 I said, "Mr. Bates, Mr. Morehouse hired him. 972 01:12:47,196 --> 01:12:49,164 I didn't hire him." 973 01:12:49,498 --> 01:12:52,956 Two more months, my pension would've taken care of my kids. 974 01:12:53,168 --> 01:12:54,465 Can I take your photo? 975 01:12:54,670 --> 01:12:56,900 Why, sure! Let me get fixed. 976 01:12:57,106 --> 01:12:59,904 I was employed... What was I talking about? 977 01:13:00,109 --> 01:13:02,270 When you were in England, sir. 978 01:13:03,312 --> 01:13:05,507 I'm so sorry. Thank you very much. 979 01:13:05,714 --> 01:13:08,911 - I was employed by an English lord. - Lord who, sir? 980 01:13:09,118 --> 01:13:13,248 A fellow called Lord Cavendish. He met this fellow Bates. 981 01:13:13,455 --> 01:13:16,618 Met him in a theater queue or somewhere. 982 01:13:16,825 --> 01:13:20,454 I don't know. It turned out they were both gamblers. 983 01:13:20,662 --> 01:13:23,460 So they arranged to play a game of billiards. 984 01:13:23,665 --> 01:13:27,101 Billiards. Take a pole, hit the balls into pockets. 985 01:13:27,302 --> 01:13:30,635 At any rate my friend, my lord, my boss... 986 01:13:30,839 --> 01:13:34,434 ...had a bit of luck and he won a herd of cattle. 987 01:13:34,643 --> 01:13:37,840 Herefords or something. About 700 of them. 988 01:13:38,046 --> 01:13:42,949 And Bates sent them over on a 747, first class. 989 01:13:43,152 --> 01:13:47,987 And that was 1978. Good heavens, time goes quickly. 990 01:13:48,190 --> 01:13:50,920 Well, '79, it must have been. 991 01:13:51,126 --> 01:13:54,061 Well, Bates came over again and he won me. 992 01:13:54,263 --> 01:13:57,323 Maybe Lord Cavendish should get better at pool. 993 01:13:57,766 --> 01:13:59,757 God bless. God bless you. 994 01:13:59,968 --> 01:14:03,495 Here's to Cavendish. May his pool game improve. 995 01:14:04,039 --> 01:14:07,372 - What'll we call it? - Paste this down there. 996 01:14:07,576 --> 01:14:10,044 - Don't move that over here. - Why not? 997 01:14:10,245 --> 01:14:12,372 It doesn't balance out. 998 01:14:12,581 --> 01:14:15,482 You put it across the top. Big headline. 999 01:14:15,684 --> 01:14:16,981 That's a good idea. 1000 01:14:17,186 --> 01:14:19,746 You know, the morning crew comes in at 8. 1001 01:14:19,955 --> 01:14:21,422 What morning crew? 1002 01:14:21,623 --> 01:14:23,955 - At the Bugle. - So what? 1003 01:14:24,159 --> 01:14:28,220 Well, we need a press. It's the only press in town, isn't it? 1004 01:14:28,430 --> 01:14:31,831 You wanna use your father's press to print our newspaper? 1005 01:14:32,034 --> 01:14:33,558 Yeah, it'll irk him. 1006 01:14:34,536 --> 01:14:35,969 I think. 1007 01:14:40,409 --> 01:14:41,603 Got it, I got it. 1008 01:14:44,179 --> 01:14:45,942 Were you ever a thief? 1009 01:14:47,216 --> 01:14:48,308 Well, were you? 1010 01:14:48,517 --> 01:14:52,851 Don't you know it's part of the black cultural imperative? 1011 01:14:53,655 --> 01:14:56,681 Come on. Grab this. 1012 01:14:58,293 --> 01:14:59,817 I've got the key. 1013 01:15:00,028 --> 01:15:03,862 You've got the key? Why didn't you tell me? 1014 01:15:04,066 --> 01:15:05,124 You didn't ask. 1015 01:15:05,334 --> 01:15:06,699 I didn't ask, huh? 1016 01:15:10,706 --> 01:15:14,767 - Evening. - Evening. Have a nice evening. 1017 01:15:17,980 --> 01:15:21,108 We really could put out a paper every week. 1018 01:15:21,316 --> 01:15:24,979 Not just about Daddy, but everything else that's wrong. 1019 01:15:25,921 --> 01:15:29,652 Best of all, I wouldn't have to go back to that school. 1020 01:15:30,125 --> 01:15:32,150 Don't worry about that now. 1021 01:15:32,361 --> 01:15:35,194 The next phase is the press. 1022 01:15:35,397 --> 01:15:39,197 - No, gotta make a plate. - Is there anything you don't know? 1023 01:15:40,836 --> 01:15:42,269 Police department? 1024 01:15:57,019 --> 01:16:00,182 The Toy. Oh, man. All right! 1025 01:16:00,756 --> 01:16:02,485 - That's it! - That is great! 1026 01:16:02,691 --> 01:16:04,818 - That's it! - That's it! 1027 01:16:05,260 --> 01:16:07,854 - Police! Hands up! - Let's get out of here! 1028 01:16:08,063 --> 01:16:09,826 Freeze! Put your hands up! 1029 01:16:12,401 --> 01:16:15,302 You can't arrest me. My name is... 1030 01:16:15,604 --> 01:16:17,697 Take them in and book them. 1031 01:16:25,747 --> 01:16:27,078 What is he saying? 1032 01:16:27,282 --> 01:16:31,048 And one of his gang came up and stuck a gun in my ribs. 1033 01:16:31,253 --> 01:16:32,515 That dirty sucker! 1034 01:16:33,422 --> 01:16:37,449 Pointing at me. What's he telling them? 1035 01:16:37,826 --> 01:16:40,795 - I've got some friends. - Wait! 1036 01:16:46,635 --> 01:16:50,298 Wait a minute. Those aren't my friends. Is there a problem? 1037 01:16:55,043 --> 01:16:58,069 - Yes, there is. - You're in big trouble. 1038 01:17:15,530 --> 01:17:19,990 Can you give me $10 for a cab? All I need is 10. Just $10. 1039 01:17:35,617 --> 01:17:37,744 Here you go. Read this paper. 1040 01:17:37,953 --> 01:17:41,116 Sir? Sir? Did you read that paper? 1041 01:17:42,290 --> 01:17:44,554 Get your paper! Read all about it! 1042 01:17:44,760 --> 01:17:46,193 Here you go. 1043 01:17:50,465 --> 01:17:54,367 Read about how U.S. Bates found his wife one day... 1044 01:17:54,569 --> 01:17:56,696 Holy shit! 1045 01:17:57,005 --> 01:17:58,768 Get your paper! 1046 01:17:59,975 --> 01:18:01,306 Paper. Free paper. 1047 01:18:01,510 --> 01:18:03,205 What do you think, Mr. O'Brien? 1048 01:18:04,379 --> 01:18:06,006 Forget you know me. 1049 01:18:07,149 --> 01:18:09,777 Jack, I gave out my last one. 1050 01:18:09,985 --> 01:18:12,852 Me too. Let's go fishing. 1051 01:18:13,055 --> 01:18:16,616 Oh, man, am I tired! Thank God this is over. 1052 01:18:25,267 --> 01:18:26,859 Mr. Bates, sir... 1053 01:18:27,502 --> 01:18:29,197 - Morning. - Good morning. 1054 01:18:29,404 --> 01:18:34,740 Take a look at the newspaper distributed by Eric and Mr. Brown. 1055 01:18:40,549 --> 01:18:45,282 - Eric is responsible for this? - And Jack Brown, sir. 1056 01:18:46,054 --> 01:18:48,921 I want them both here... 1057 01:18:49,124 --> 01:18:52,184 ...in my office, now. 1058 01:18:57,466 --> 01:19:00,128 Attention, Jack Brown and Master Bates. 1059 01:19:00,335 --> 01:19:05,170 Report immediately to the office. Repeat, immediately. 1060 01:19:06,374 --> 01:19:08,740 - Yes, you two. - Okay. 1061 01:19:11,513 --> 01:19:13,845 Would you have me stay or go? 1062 01:19:18,587 --> 01:19:19,815 Come in. 1063 01:19:25,460 --> 01:19:26,984 Take a seat. 1064 01:19:32,534 --> 01:19:36,937 Eric, how many of those papers did you hand out? 1065 01:19:37,139 --> 01:19:38,766 About a thousand. 1066 01:19:39,474 --> 01:19:42,466 I want each paper accounted for. 1067 01:19:42,677 --> 01:19:45,646 And then I want them shredded. 1068 01:19:45,847 --> 01:19:48,782 Let Carter do it. I want you back here. 1069 01:19:49,684 --> 01:19:52,778 We'll make even more tomorrow and sell them... 1070 01:19:52,988 --> 01:19:57,448 - That's one trick you won't manage. - You wanna bet? 1071 01:19:58,093 --> 01:20:01,585 I assume, Brown, you know the penalties for libel? 1072 01:20:01,797 --> 01:20:06,632 - Everyone knows it's true. - They're lies if I say so. 1073 01:20:06,835 --> 01:20:09,497 - But it's the truth. - The truth? 1074 01:20:12,507 --> 01:20:15,169 Truth has nothing to do with reality. 1075 01:20:15,777 --> 01:20:18,405 You have to deal with reality. 1076 01:20:19,181 --> 01:20:24,016 In reality, any one of these people, with a little persuasion... 1077 01:20:24,219 --> 01:20:27,052 ...will say what I want them to say... 1078 01:20:27,255 --> 01:20:29,917 ...because I am reality. 1079 01:20:34,729 --> 01:20:36,822 Take your pants down. 1080 01:20:40,335 --> 01:20:44,829 I said, take your pants down. Right here. Right now. 1081 01:20:48,710 --> 01:20:52,544 - I have to? - Well, if you value your job. 1082 01:21:00,422 --> 01:21:02,253 That's reality. 1083 01:21:10,498 --> 01:21:11,522 Get dressed. 1084 01:21:13,068 --> 01:21:17,630 Mr. Brown, maybe I could use your talents on The Bugle. 1085 01:21:18,006 --> 01:21:21,806 - Cleaning lady get fired? - Start Monday, in the newsroom. 1086 01:21:22,277 --> 01:21:25,474 A press card, salary, everything. 1087 01:21:30,685 --> 01:21:32,152 Your hand? 1088 01:21:52,574 --> 01:21:54,599 It's that bad out there? 1089 01:21:55,410 --> 01:21:56,672 Worse. 1090 01:22:16,765 --> 01:22:20,496 I got a job. I guess I can be happy about that. 1091 01:22:20,969 --> 01:22:23,403 Why are you so happy about it? 1092 01:22:23,605 --> 01:22:28,941 My father will tell you to drop your pants, and you're gonna do it. 1093 01:22:29,544 --> 01:22:33,503 He treats people like nothing. Didn't you read our paper? 1094 01:22:33,882 --> 01:22:35,679 I can see the headline: 1095 01:22:35,884 --> 01:22:39,945 "Jack Brown Sold Out Today to U.S. Bates, as Expected." 1096 01:22:40,155 --> 01:22:42,817 You want me to starve to death? 1097 01:22:43,024 --> 01:22:46,687 I can't feed myself on high ideas and principles. 1098 01:22:46,895 --> 01:22:49,159 I thought you were world-class. 1099 01:22:49,764 --> 01:22:54,258 Your head's in this American dream, but it doesn't work for me. 1100 01:22:54,469 --> 01:22:59,805 Truth, justice and the American way do not work for me, okay? 1101 01:23:00,342 --> 01:23:02,776 I gotta play in the grownup world. 1102 01:23:02,978 --> 01:23:06,470 - You could've come to Houston with me. - As your toy? 1103 01:23:06,681 --> 01:23:08,979 No, as my friend. 1104 01:23:13,722 --> 01:23:17,590 Damn, man. I am your friend, Eric. 1105 01:23:27,602 --> 01:23:31,868 - It's the senator! - Senator Newcomb. Congratulations! 1106 01:23:44,953 --> 01:23:46,079 Senator Newcomb. 1107 01:23:55,630 --> 01:23:59,964 - Who's that? - Angela. Jesus H. Christ! 1108 01:24:00,168 --> 01:24:01,465 That her full name? 1109 01:24:01,669 --> 01:24:03,637 Greetings, senator! 1110 01:24:03,838 --> 01:24:06,705 Oh, U.S., it's good to see you. 1111 01:24:06,908 --> 01:24:10,537 - You remember Terry Gay? My secretary. - I sure do! 1112 01:24:10,745 --> 01:24:14,704 - You look good enough to eat. - Say, what is all this? 1113 01:24:14,916 --> 01:24:18,852 I think it's the orchestra. Come in. Party's in the back. 1114 01:24:19,054 --> 01:24:21,249 Senator, darling. 1115 01:24:22,724 --> 01:24:24,055 My wife. 1116 01:24:24,259 --> 01:24:27,490 We're not getting back in the bus. 1117 01:24:27,695 --> 01:24:31,256 Now, we can legally protest. We are... 1118 01:24:31,466 --> 01:24:33,195 You're Mr. Brown's... 1119 01:24:33,401 --> 01:24:36,427 He's raising money for the KKK fund. 1120 01:24:39,908 --> 01:24:42,274 The auction is tomorrow! 1121 01:24:42,477 --> 01:24:45,037 - Let's talk. - What are you doing here? 1122 01:24:45,246 --> 01:24:47,806 What's going on? Where you going? 1123 01:24:48,016 --> 01:24:51,179 What are you doing? Somebody could get hurt. 1124 01:24:51,386 --> 01:24:53,877 - I'm trying to help. - You're not. 1125 01:24:54,089 --> 01:24:58,549 - They're raising money for the KKK. - Lf you ever loved me, trust me. 1126 01:24:58,760 --> 01:25:03,322 - I'll take care of it. This is Eric. - Nice to meet you. 1127 01:25:03,531 --> 01:25:06,432 Nice to meet you. You better be right. 1128 01:25:06,634 --> 01:25:10,365 You'd better be right. Let's get back in the van. 1129 01:25:20,014 --> 01:25:23,882 Nobody throws a garden party like U.S. Bates. 1130 01:25:27,155 --> 01:25:31,216 I appreciate you throwing this party for us. 1131 01:25:31,426 --> 01:25:34,987 Old Democrats don't usually support young Liberals. 1132 01:25:35,196 --> 01:25:40,133 Senator, we agreed to keep this under our hats, remember? 1133 01:25:40,335 --> 01:25:43,634 If they knew it was a fundraiser, we'd be alone. 1134 01:25:43,838 --> 01:25:47,035 - We wouldn't want that, would we? - Pardon me. 1135 01:25:48,977 --> 01:25:52,572 You remember my pal and fellow Klan member, Clancy. 1136 01:25:52,780 --> 01:25:55,214 Hi, how are you? Good to see you. 1137 01:25:55,416 --> 01:25:57,976 The Klan really thanks you. 1138 01:25:58,186 --> 01:26:01,519 Democrats don't normally support us in the open. 1139 01:26:01,723 --> 01:26:05,659 We agreed to keep that under our hat, remember? 1140 01:26:05,860 --> 01:26:09,728 If they knew this was a fundraiser, we'd be all alone. 1141 01:26:09,931 --> 01:26:12,627 Come on over and meet the senator. 1142 01:26:14,002 --> 01:26:16,163 Meet my friend Clarence. 1143 01:26:16,371 --> 01:26:20,569 This is the senator. Photographer! 1144 01:26:20,775 --> 01:26:23,938 Take a little picture. And make it good. 1145 01:26:26,214 --> 01:26:28,148 Hang on to your seat! 1146 01:26:35,290 --> 01:26:36,723 Hi, Dad! 1147 01:26:37,959 --> 01:26:40,723 What are you doing here, you asshole? 1148 01:26:40,929 --> 01:26:44,729 The question is, what the hell you doing here? 1149 01:26:44,933 --> 01:26:45,922 You're fired! 1150 01:26:46,134 --> 01:26:48,967 You know who you're taking a photo with? 1151 01:26:49,170 --> 01:26:50,330 No. Who? 1152 01:26:50,538 --> 01:26:53,632 The Grand Wizard of the Ku Klux Klan. 1153 01:26:54,375 --> 01:26:57,105 That'll surprise a lot of your voters. 1154 01:26:57,312 --> 01:27:01,009 Mr. Bates'll get a lot of mileage out of that photo. 1155 01:27:01,349 --> 01:27:06,548 - You're fired. - Are the FCC, IRS, or FBI after you? 1156 01:27:07,989 --> 01:27:12,426 He doesn't know what he's saying. Music! Everybody dance. 1157 01:27:12,627 --> 01:27:15,460 - Let's get him! - Holy shit! 1158 01:27:25,740 --> 01:27:29,369 - Go for the tents! - I'll get the other side! 1159 01:27:29,577 --> 01:27:31,408 Get the tents! 1160 01:27:33,915 --> 01:27:35,473 Duck, you suckers! 1161 01:27:38,319 --> 01:27:40,844 - Senator... - Later, Bates. 1162 01:27:41,256 --> 01:27:45,488 Fair-weather friend, the bastard. I told you to dance! 1163 01:27:45,693 --> 01:27:46,682 Yes, sir! 1164 01:27:46,894 --> 01:27:48,828 Don't jump her. Just dance! 1165 01:27:49,030 --> 01:27:52,659 - Let's get them again! - Let's go back for another try. 1166 01:27:53,568 --> 01:27:56,799 - Here they come again! - Do your thing, Jack! 1167 01:27:58,940 --> 01:28:01,966 All right, war has been declared! 1168 01:28:04,579 --> 01:28:06,444 You show them, Jack! 1169 01:28:08,883 --> 01:28:10,544 Angela, this is for you! 1170 01:28:16,691 --> 01:28:19,455 What's the matter? I'm in the back. 1171 01:28:19,661 --> 01:28:23,859 - Hang on, wizard! Let's go to Oz. - Let me off! 1172 01:28:24,065 --> 01:28:26,260 You want to get off here? 1173 01:28:27,402 --> 01:28:30,428 Way to go, Jack! All right! 1174 01:28:33,875 --> 01:28:37,971 You look like an Eskimo Pie. No, I've got it. Al Jolson. 1175 01:28:38,179 --> 01:28:41,774 - Jack, look out! - I'll give you an Eskimo Pie! 1176 01:28:41,983 --> 01:28:44,076 What's wrong? Are you okay? 1177 01:28:55,096 --> 01:28:57,963 Frنulein, this is for you! 1178 01:28:59,934 --> 01:29:02,095 I've had enough of this. 1179 01:29:02,637 --> 01:29:06,095 - Put that pie down! - I didn't throw the first pie. 1180 01:29:06,307 --> 01:29:08,207 Klansman, let's go. 1181 01:29:18,686 --> 01:29:20,017 Why, you nitwit! 1182 01:29:27,862 --> 01:29:30,023 Let's get out of here! 1183 01:29:30,231 --> 01:29:32,699 - Move it! - I'll get you! 1184 01:29:33,267 --> 01:29:37,533 - You trying to kill the kid? - No! I'm trying to kill you. 1185 01:29:37,739 --> 01:29:39,536 Come on, Jack. Hurry up. 1186 01:29:43,878 --> 01:29:47,712 I'll get you! There's no way to get away! 1187 01:29:47,915 --> 01:29:51,112 - Can't you go faster? - I'm hurrying. 1188 01:29:55,156 --> 01:29:58,489 - Look out! - You can't get away! 1189 01:29:58,693 --> 01:29:59,557 Look out! 1190 01:30:07,602 --> 01:30:10,594 Holy cow! It works! 1191 01:30:11,539 --> 01:30:13,234 Daddy! 1192 01:30:14,709 --> 01:30:16,939 He's in trouble! 1193 01:30:20,648 --> 01:30:22,138 But I can't swim! 1194 01:30:26,120 --> 01:30:28,645 You dirty son of a bitch! 1195 01:30:29,056 --> 01:30:32,514 What? I can't hear you, Mr. Bates. 1196 01:30:35,029 --> 01:30:36,326 Come on. Get out! 1197 01:30:39,534 --> 01:30:41,798 Daddy, are you okay? 1198 01:30:42,036 --> 01:30:44,095 Thank you, Jack. Thank you. 1199 01:30:58,920 --> 01:31:02,617 Mr. Bates, please don't shoot me! 1200 01:31:06,561 --> 01:31:08,188 Come in. 1201 01:31:15,369 --> 01:31:18,896 You saved my life. So I guess I owe you one. 1202 01:31:27,215 --> 01:31:32,016 After what I did to your party, I think we're even, okay? 1203 01:31:32,220 --> 01:31:35,485 You know, that kid loves you. 1204 01:31:36,023 --> 01:31:37,854 He never loved me. 1205 01:31:38,059 --> 01:31:41,460 Sorry to hear that. Try talking to him. 1206 01:31:41,662 --> 01:31:45,723 Yeah, I talk to him. But he won't talk to me. 1207 01:31:48,469 --> 01:31:51,632 Your son loves you. You gotta hug him. 1208 01:31:51,906 --> 01:31:53,806 You mean, physically? 1209 01:31:54,008 --> 01:31:57,944 Have you ever let your son sit on your lap... 1210 01:31:58,145 --> 01:32:01,376 ...and put your arms around him and talk to him? 1211 01:32:01,582 --> 01:32:04,710 Pretend I'm Eric, and I'm home for a week. 1212 01:32:04,919 --> 01:32:09,549 "Dad, I haven't seen you in a while! I wanna sit on your lap!" 1213 01:32:09,757 --> 01:32:12,419 - Are you crazy? - Yes, but trust me. 1214 01:32:12,627 --> 01:32:15,994 "Come on, Dad, let's sit down! Come on!" 1215 01:32:16,397 --> 01:32:20,993 "Pops, how you doing? Boy, I had a great time all year." 1216 01:32:21,202 --> 01:32:25,070 I'll sit in your lap. "How you doing?" Hug me. Come on. 1217 01:32:25,273 --> 01:32:28,936 - Hug me and say, "I love you." - I love you. 1218 01:32:29,143 --> 01:32:31,475 - Say it louder. - I love you! 1219 01:32:39,720 --> 01:32:42,211 You kinky little devil, you! 1220 01:33:30,705 --> 01:33:33,640 I want you to understand something. 1221 01:33:34,108 --> 01:33:38,044 Whenever I drill an oil well, buy a cable system... 1222 01:33:38,245 --> 01:33:41,442 ...open a store, it's for you. 1223 01:33:42,249 --> 01:33:46,310 When you grow up, you'll control South Central Louisiana. 1224 01:33:46,520 --> 01:33:48,385 And that's some trick. 1225 01:33:48,689 --> 01:33:52,489 Jack says life's about people, not about your power. 1226 01:33:52,693 --> 01:33:56,288 He has no power. Of course it's people for him. 1227 01:33:56,497 --> 01:33:58,397 He has nothing else. 1228 01:33:58,899 --> 01:34:01,800 He says friends are most important. 1229 01:34:02,003 --> 01:34:04,267 I'm trying to talk to you. 1230 01:34:04,705 --> 01:34:09,870 He says you don't have any friends and that you know two kinds of people: 1231 01:34:10,077 --> 01:34:14,741 - Ones that owe you and ones you owe. - I've heard enough about Jack. 1232 01:34:14,949 --> 01:34:16,246 That's it! 1233 01:34:21,956 --> 01:34:25,357 Eric, I'm trying. Give me a chance. 1234 01:34:28,095 --> 01:34:31,997 How about you and me going to Europe together? 1235 01:34:32,199 --> 01:34:35,566 There's no reason for you to go back to camp. 1236 01:34:35,770 --> 01:34:39,001 We'll go to London, Paris, Rome. 1237 01:34:45,446 --> 01:34:47,744 It might have been a nice trip. 1238 01:34:59,160 --> 01:35:02,288 Good to see you. How are things going? 1239 01:35:02,496 --> 01:35:04,896 The storm is moving southwest... 1240 01:35:05,099 --> 01:35:08,626 ...so there's really no problem... Mr. Bates! Eric! 1241 01:35:14,041 --> 01:35:17,477 Jesus! Come on, follow that kid! 1242 01:35:30,091 --> 01:35:33,185 - Put it on my dad's bill. - Okay, kid. 1243 01:35:36,731 --> 01:35:39,700 No. Running away, what is that? 1244 01:35:39,900 --> 01:35:42,460 - I wanna stay with you. - No! 1245 01:35:47,508 --> 01:35:51,569 I don't like this mean game you're playing with your dad. 1246 01:35:51,779 --> 01:35:56,239 He's reaching out to you. He's making an effort. You're not. 1247 01:35:56,584 --> 01:36:00,918 You're a better person than that. Give the man a break. 1248 01:36:04,792 --> 01:36:05,986 Please. 1249 01:36:12,399 --> 01:36:13,889 Come here, man. 1250 01:36:16,003 --> 01:36:19,234 - I love you, Jack. - I love you too, Eric. 1251 01:36:19,440 --> 01:36:22,136 But I want you to do what's right. 1252 01:36:23,010 --> 01:36:27,572 You, your father and me gotta be the strangest people on earth. 1253 01:36:27,782 --> 01:36:29,044 Do you know that? 1254 01:36:44,565 --> 01:36:46,863 I want you to do what's right. 1255 01:37:00,981 --> 01:37:05,816 If you love him and if you need him, you gotta tell him so. 1256 01:37:06,220 --> 01:37:09,951 If ever two people needed each other, it's you two. 1257 01:37:19,700 --> 01:37:21,031 You know... 1258 01:37:22,236 --> 01:37:23,897 ...he's right. 1259 01:37:24,939 --> 01:37:28,670 I do need you. And I love you. 1260 01:37:30,911 --> 01:37:34,278 I love you, Daddy. I really love you. 1261 01:37:39,720 --> 01:37:41,813 I really love you. 1262 01:37:45,359 --> 01:37:47,224 Get in the car, son. 1263 01:37:50,030 --> 01:37:53,522 - You know that job I offered you? - On the newspaper? 1264 01:37:53,934 --> 01:37:55,595 It's for real. 1265 01:37:56,370 --> 01:38:00,636 - You won't be sorry, U.S. - "You ass." You're allowed. 1266 01:38:02,843 --> 01:38:05,311 Next year, he'll have two weeks. 1267 01:38:05,512 --> 01:38:08,276 One week with me, one week with you. 1268 01:38:08,482 --> 01:38:10,507 All right! 1269 01:38:11,619 --> 01:38:13,814 - Take it easy. - See you later! 1270 01:38:14,021 --> 01:38:15,886 To the airport, Mr. Bates? 1271 01:38:16,090 --> 01:38:18,786 - You're okay, "us." - I'm okay, me too. 1272 01:38:18,993 --> 01:38:21,621 All right, I'll see you next year. 1273 01:38:22,129 --> 01:38:25,826 Hey, Jack. You got some rich friends. 1274 01:38:29,536 --> 01:38:33,097 That's all right, Roberts. Oh, Mr. Brown! 1275 01:38:33,307 --> 01:38:37,710 - You want to talk to me? - I don't know if you remember me. 1276 01:38:37,912 --> 01:38:40,472 I'm Honey Russell, the D.A.'s wife. 1277 01:38:40,681 --> 01:38:44,617 We met at the Bates' party. I want to talk to you a bit. 1278 01:38:44,818 --> 01:38:48,345 Fancy and I were talking the other day... 1279 01:38:48,555 --> 01:38:52,457 ...about the wonderful job you've done with U.S.'s son. 1280 01:38:52,660 --> 01:38:57,120 Is it possible for you to come and spend a few weeks with us... 1281 01:38:57,331 --> 01:39:00,528 ...and sort of help us with our son, Eugene? 1282 01:39:01,302 --> 01:39:03,031 Up yours, you mother! 1283 01:39:04,972 --> 01:39:09,807 I'm sorry, Mr. Brown! Gosh! He'll never do that again. Please! 1284 01:39:12,012 --> 01:39:15,072 Mr. Brown, please!